#I spend all day anxious and dreading his next walk

[fbisgayesttrio]

I love Loki but having a reactive dog is making my depression and anxiety so much worse

[m3l0nfl0at]

pack it up - t. kuroo

kuroo tetsurou x gn! reader ; FLUFF SO MUCH FLUFF, reader has doubts (who doesn’t honestly), domestic kuroo x reader, kenma teases you and kuroo for being simps, nerdy and simp kuroo (yummy, my fav), oh and timeskip!kuroo, 3.3k words

summary ; this is a mini fic based off of my fic here, just say yes but this can be read as a stand alone! You and Kuroo decide to take your relationship to the next level, are you ready for that change though? (aka moving in with kuroo)

melon’s recommended melody: moving out - kacey musgraves

Packing was always dreadful, it didn’t feel like long ago you were taking all this stuff out of the box and now you’re here putting it all back in a box. Even though Kenma told Kuroo to not steal his roommate, here you are moving into Kuroo’s apartment. Kenma keeps passing by your room watching you pack because each time he passes by, you’re focusing on something different. “You know Kuroo’s expecting you to be ready in three days, right? If you keep going at this rate, you’ll be done in, say, three years.” Kenma slowly walks away before you could even respond to him. Oh, how you were going to miss his sweet remarks. Truth be told, you loved living with Kenma, he was always neat, kept to himself, and you got used to hearing the video games he played during the night, even going so far as to call it “white noise”. Nevertheless, when Kuroo asked you last month if you wanted to move in, you felt ready to take your relationship to the next step. Kuroo would spend the night at your place occasionally. Nevertheless, you were more likely to spend the night at his due to not wanting to be affectionate in front of your roommate. If old habits die hard, then why were you here getting anxious at the thought of living with your boyfriend?

Living with Kenma, you got used to your daily routine in this apartment, you knew this apartment like the back of your hand, and you got used to seeing Kenma everyday but now that’s all going to change? You suppose that’s why it’s taking you forever to pack, you slightly fear everything changing too quickly. On one hand you’re excited to move in with your boyfriend, seeing Kuroo everyday? Yes please! On the other hand, you’re going to be seeing Kuroo everyday. What if he gets tired of you, what if he gets mad at your habits, or what if you guys realize living with each other that you guys aren’t meant for a relationship? Hearing Kenma walk by again, only to see you zoned out looking at a box labeled mementos. Kenma sensed something was wrong but thought if he kept walking by, maybe you would realize what little time you had and get to packing. However, by his fifth time walking by, he knew you were overthinking. Due to you being too quiet for your own good, that was his thing after all. “Tell me.”, you look up to see Kenma leaning on the door frame. “There’s nothing to tell, Ken. Just overwhelmed with how much crap I have to pack up.”, Kenma’s face relaxes as he glares at you. “Don’t make me call your boyfriend, so he can come give you a sappy talk.” You look back slowly at the mention of Kuroo not wanting him to see you in this state. “You know what? Maybe you do need your boyfriend to come snap you out of whatever daze you’re in. Who knows, maybe he’ll help you pack faster.”

You chuckle, knowing that Kenma secretly pokes fun at you guys for the way you both act so sweetly towards each other. “Would you make fun of me if I said to call Kuroo right now?” Kenma rolls his eyes, walking away. “I’ll call him.”, Kenma would never admit this out loud but he secretly loves seeing the way Kuroo folds for you. If Kenma wasn’t above publicly teasing he would so make fun of him for being absolutely whipped for you. Kenma left you alone with your sad empty mementos box, lifting up a picture frame that contained a picture with you and Kenma from when you first moved in. A part of your heart breaks, you reassure yourself that Kenma will always be here in this apartment. You hope he knows that a part of you will always be here too. If it weren’t for him, you and Kuroo would’ve never been together. You owe a lot to Kenma, from kickstarting your career to introducing you to your future boyfriend. Plus, you work under Bouncing Ball corp so you’ll still see him every other day. Kenma comes back and sees you look at the picture of you two, “You work for me you know? Plus you’re dating my best friend, I'm not dead or anything.”. Laughing you look up at him, “Can’t you let me be sentimental! I got used to your quirks, your 3 A.M. gaming, and your obnoxious best friend. I’m just going to miss seeing you as much as we are used to, that’s all.”

“We both know you just hate change but if it helps I’m going to miss you too. The apartment does look a little glum as you’re packing away all your stuff. I guess I actually have to decorate now.”, he groans thinking about how he’s going to decorate the apartment to fill your space. “Maybe now you can use my room to make that theater you always wanted?” Kenma nods, glad that you weren’t completely gone yet. Placing the picture frame in the box, you hear the door open. Quickly getting up to be met with Kuroo at the front door holding takeout, “There’s my beautiful partner, hi baby.”, you take the bags from his hands before he pulls you in for a hug placing a quick kiss on your cheek. Kenma comes behind you stealing the bags from you, gagging at the shared exchange. Kuroo laughs, “Well hello to you too, Kenma.”. You and Kuroo start heading to the table as Kuroo pulls out a chair for you to sit in.

The night goes on, as you all end up talking about your day and how the following days were going to look for the three of you amidst the chaos that was moving out. “Sweetheart, have you almost finished packing? I wanna know how much stuff you have so I can book the moving truck.”, you freeze. “About that…”, Kenma cuts you off, “All she has packed is a picture frame.”. You look over at Kenma, bewildered that he ratted you out. Kuroo laughs at how cute you look but is also shocked that you’ve packed so little in a week. “Let’s go baby, I’ll help you pack your things.” Kuroo gets up finished with his plate and grabs yours to place them both in the sink. Following him to your room you start to feel anxiety creep in, shaking your head to get rid of the thoughts. Kuroo walks in to see boxes all labeled and set up, yet lacking all the items inside. “Well, you would win the contest for boxing baby but not so much for packing.”. You place your head in your hands, “I know, this is so embarrassing. In my defense, every time I start to pack I get distracted and start doing something else.”. Kuroo grabs your hands off your face, placing them back on your lap, “Well now I’m here to help you, no need to be embarrassed sweetheart.”.

Kuroo grabs your box labeled clothes heading to the closet to start neatly folding the items in your closet. “Baby, do you want me to put this away in a specific way? Or should I just try to stuff everything in the box? Bunny?” Kuroo peeks his head out of the closet. Seeing you entranced on another picture frame, “Sweetheart, at this point I’ll pack the mementos.”. Kuroo went to grab the frame before he saw a picture of you as a toddler, now yanking it out of your hand. “Baby! Are you joking? You are so adorable! Oh my god this has to be hung up in the living room so I can see your cute little face before I leave for work!” You roll your eyes at Kuroo’s behavior, “Kenma should just pack the mementos because you would definitely not be faster than I am.” You get up to hug him from behind, “Tetsu, can I be honest with you?” Kuroo is still looking at the picture of you as he hums in approval. “I’m nervous.”, Kuroo finally places the picture in the box before turning to fully face you. Kuroo pulls you into a hug, kissing the top of your head. “Breathe baby, your brain needs oxygen.” laughing along with him for being such a dork. “You know it’s okay to be nervous right? You’re going through a big change, be more lenient with yourself, yeah?”

Kuroo pulls back from you, “All I know is right now, my heart is pumping like crazy thinking about you living with me.” You laugh as he places your hand on his heart feeling the said thumping. Kuroo brought the positives into your life that you needed, made you feel safe, and most importantly stood by you even if you surrounded yourself in negative thoughts. “I’ll wake up to your breathtaking face every morning, come home to your heartstopping smile, and go to sleep with you in my arms. What more could I ask for? We’ll get through this together. I mean it’s not like I’ve ever lived with anyone before, especially with someone as gorgeous as you.”, you punch Kuroo’s shoulder rolling your eyes . Kenma coughs interrupting Kuroo’s speech before it went off the rails, “So I take it you're still not packed? You are both hopeless, move over.” Kenma starts placing all your mementos away in seconds, you look over at Kuroo mouthing I told you so. “I brought Kuroo to help you pack and now I’m here to hold Kuroo accountable. You both are going to get nothing done at your apartment, if all you do is give each other heart eyes all day.”, you and Kuroo blush profusely knowing that you’ve both been caught.

With Kenma helping you pack everything went smoothly, Kuroo left for the night leaving you and Kenma alone for the next two days. “Well, we got mostly everything. I just need to take down the last of my posters. I don't want them to bend out of shape in the boxes. Then we can start loading everything into the truck.”, you stopped when you suddenly heard a shuffle behind you. Turning around to be met with Kenma looking around and touching the empty walls glumly, “It’s going to be hard to find something to replace your space. That something is going to fall short in everything compared to you.”, you get closer to Kenma before nudging his shoulder softly. “I’ll miss you too Ken. Thank you for everything, I could never repay you for the amount of kindness you showed me.”, breaking away it felt bittersweet. The walls were suddenly white with no more picture frames or traces of you anywhere, you’re actually moving out. “You ready to start packing up the truck?” Kuroo's bedhead fills the doorway as Kenma gives you one last smile pushing you towards Kuroo. You take up his offer, getting to work by lifting your boxes that is until Kuroo stops you. “Oh, sweetheart, I’ll take that one. Don’t want to bump into each other again, do we? Can’t have you falling for me a second time.”. You brush off his comment but you're strangling him as soon as you get to your new apartment.

All the coming and going back and forth had you exhausted, wanting nothing more than to start unpacking everything. You go to Kuroo’s room making a mental list of everything you need to buy from furniture to home products. Kuroo says goodbye to Kenma, a few seconds later you hear his footsteps approach you from down the hallway. He walks up from behind, embracing you, “You ready to start unpacking baby? Ken said he gave you the next couple of days off so you can settle in.”. You nod, wanting nothing more than to make this apartment your new home, “Yeah, I was thinking we could go to a furniture shop and also to the groceries! You know just so I can get some of my favorite products-”. “No need to worry bunny, I restocked your products you left here. I also got you a dresser for your side of the closet, even separated my side from yours. However, if you still want we can go to the groceries and Ikea just in case I missed something.” You turn around amazed he did all of that for you, “Are you serious Kuroo? You thought that far ahead?”. He nods excitedly, dragging you to the closet as you see his side of the closet filled with clothes. In addition, you see the newly setup dresser for you on your side. Then he drags you to the bathroom looking at the shower rack filled with all your regular products and a space in the toothbrush holder for you. Spinning around to crush him in a hug. He knows that change wasn’t always easy for you but if he could do anything extra to make it easier, he would do it again a thousand times. “I love you so much Tetsu.”, Kuroo grins into the crook of your neck feeling his palms getting sweaty due to being so close to you.

“Well, this is our home now. I want you to feel the same way I do when I’m with you, safe and welcomed.”, you pull back pecking him on the lips. “You’re getting too good at reading me, it's starting to freak me out Tetsu. Don’t tell me you even bought me my own loofah?” Kuroo bashfully opens the shower curtain to show you the new loofah standing next to his. You laugh suddenly feeling at ease, having to ask Kenma later if he had any part in this. Kuroo was right, this is your home, you didn’t want to be anywhere but with him. “Well casanova, help me unpack will ya?” Kuroo scrunches his nose at the new nickname you call him. “Nope, try again baby.”, you think hard trying to think of a nickname that’ll smoothly roll off the tongue. “Ok what about handsome, my love, darling, superstar, my loverboy, captain-”, Kuroo places a hand over your mouth quickly. His face is so red, it almost replicates a tomato, “Yes to all but I fear that if you kept going I was going to have a heart attack. Plus, we still have to unpack and I don’t think I can hold myself back for much longer if you keep calling me sweet names.”

After an eventful day of unpacking, you and Kuroo spent the rest of the day cuddling at ease which is something you usually do every night. Yet both of you felt so giddy laying down tonight, you don’t have to wake up in the morning and immediately leave for your train. Instead you’ll wake up, look over to the love of your life and start your new daily routine with him doing the most domestic things together. You fell asleep knowing this was a new chapter in your life and as scary as that was, you know wouldn’t want to share this experience with anyone else. Kuroo wraps his hand around your waist, sighing, feeling at peace with everything around him. He had nothing to worry about, no worries like if you made it home safely or if some creep on the train bothered you, you were right here safe in his arms. You both wouldn’t want to be anywhere but here, encapsulated in each other's warmth.

Feeling the sun slowly creeping up you turn around to face Kuroo, “No, don’t move, I need five more minutes.”. Giggling as you still move, wanting to see his face like you did the day you realized you liked him. “Isn’t this a sight to see? You know what, I don't need five more minutes, your face is my energizer. I can’t believe I get to wake up to you everyday, I must’ve solved some huge problem in my past life to be blessed with you.”, you hide your face in his chest from all the compliments he paid you this early in the morning. Kuroo kisses the top of your head before you feel the rumble of his laugh traveling through his chest. “Want to go make breakfast with me bunny? I bought some groceries to make pancakes. Yeah?”, you nod your head as you head to the bathroom to do your routine. Kuroo walks behind you, by reflex you hand him a spa headband so he can wash his face. He takes the black cat ear headband looking at it confused, your eyes widen standing straight up. “Sorry! I would always wash my face with Kenma so it’s by reflex.” Kuroo kisses your cheek following you while putting on the headband, “Okay, show me what you do baby. Maybe if I do everything correctly I’ll look as flawless as you do everyday.”

You take your time explaining to Kuroo your skincare and how to apply everything in which he obediently follows, taking note of what products you like for later. Then you both brush your teeth, making sure to go through everything diligently. However, when you looked at Kuroo you noticed his hair was sort of deflated. Due to him not being able to sleep between two pillows like he usually does. You start combing through his soft locks, seeing how he deflates under your touch. “You ready to go make some breakfast, my love?” Kuroo flushed under your touch and the use of his new nickname, nodding not wanting to wait a second. You grab his hand leading him to the kitchen, Kuroo smiles. Glad that you’re familiar enough with his apartment layout to lead him through it. “Ok handsome, let’s go make some pancakes.”

Kuroo guides you through his kitchen showing you where the spices were, how he dedicated a whole shelf in his pantry for you, and where he puts his utensils. Feeling confident enough you head to the pantry finding the pancake mix and hand it to him, while he grabs it but not forgetting to place a kiss on your hand. Wrapping your arms around his waist, feeling the muscles on his back move as he softly whisks the pancake batter, finding solace in this moment. “You still tired bunny? You can go lay down I’ll wake you when everything’s done.”, you shake your head. “No I’m not tired, just really comfortable right now with you. Being here, I feel welcomed by everything that you are. Waking up I see you, the living room has traces of your style, like it just feels like you everywhere I go.” Kuroo softly chuckles, “That’s good though right?” he feels you nod your hair ticking his back.

Letting go of Kuroo, you leave him to cook the pancakes while you prepare fruit and set the table. Kuroo pulls out your chair letting you sit down as he serves you a plate of pancakes shaped like a heart. You smile as he sits down grabbing your hand, caressing it, lifting his mug. “Here’s to our first full day of living together, I know there will be many more to go, I love you bunny.”, you smile clinking your mugs together. You send a picture to Kenma of Kuroo eating his pancakes surrounded by the array of fruit you cut up for the both of you. Making sure to get the heart shaped pancakes Kuroo made for you in the shot as well. Only to immediately get a reply back, “You both make me sick. Enjoy the new apartment lovebirds! (¬⤙¬ )”.

divider credit to @/vase-of-lilies, @/bunnysrph, and @/thecutestgrotto

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ melon's marginalia: writing this had me giggling so bad also just say yes now has a time line so please look forward to the masterlist! p.p.s i am accepting request for just say yes! kuroo short stories so hit up my inbox and i’ll try to get those done! i’m doing everything in a timeline order so pls be patient just know i see them! <3

@m3l0nfl0at on tumblr. All Rights Reserved. Do not steal, copy, or translate any of my works.

[t0rturedangel]

I read all of your fics so far and they're great!! I really like your writing, it's fantastic! :3 Could I request a fic for Lucifer with a reader who is anxious and depressed, like him? - 🐇

╭ . . . 𝚝𝚠𝚘 𝚙𝚎𝚊𝚜 𝚒𝚗 𝚊 𝚙𝚘𝚍 ੭

𝐋𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐑 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 ♰ ৎ﹕𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦

WOOOO I LOVE LUCIFER SM ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY so I'm so happy I have a request for him, i don't think i did a good job since I'm not sure how to write for stuff like this but still hope you like it!!!! also this is short so i'm sorry

✧⠀⨾ Mainly, since the two of you probably don't want to interact with the world of sinners, just stay in Lucifer's home.

✧⠀⨾ the two of you are probably coming up with new duck ideas, just the two of you- since literally no one else is welcome : the both of you hate interacting with anyone you don't have to, unless it's Charlie and her friends though that's rare

✧⠀⨾ whenever the two of you get like really anxious, or stare out the window in dread at all the sinners the other one will bring a duck over, like a personally made duck to try and help

✧⠀⨾ Lucifer has defiantly made a few ducks that look like you to try and help take your mind of your anxiety and focus on his craftmanship

જ⁀➴ Staring out of one of the many windows Lucifer had in his home, your eyes scanned over all the sinners and imps alike running around and causing havoc. Their behavior was one of the main reasons you and Lucifer never went out, beside the sheer anxiety of interacting with anyone. Sinners were crude, vulgar and had no respect for themselves or the people around them. At the thought of even talking to someone besides Lucifer caused your heart to speed up, your breathing quickening little by little which was your cue to turn from the window yet you found it difficult to do, the next option was to try and think of something different, anything different, like spending time with lucifer 

The isolation from the rest of hell wasn't bad at all, you had Lucifer, Lucifer had you and the two of you had ducks! dozens and dozens of ducks... it's almost concerning really- you and his would always spend your seemingly endless days in Lucifer's workshop for hours, always designing and creating these silly little duck toys, and while Lucifer would always bring himself down at the end of the completed project, saying how the parts that he worked on were terrible while simultaneously praising your side of the work- it was almost pitiful watching the king of hell say such things though you never indulged or agreed to his self-degradation, instead you attempted to bring his spirits back up by complementing his work. Though, your methods would only sometimes work, as at those times Lucifer would sort of- avoid listening to your words.

     Speaking of Lucifer, and the ducks- you noticed that Lucifer walked in the room you were resting in, a huge smile on his face as he held something behind his back. Your curiosity was peaked almost immediately, what did he have behind his back? was it money? food? a duck? the questions were endless and only came to a halt when Lucifer called to you. ˓˓ [name], my dearrr ʾʾ the tone of his voice perfectly matched his pale face, he was defiantly happy about something but what was it? finally, your mind was off of the outside world and now on lucifer and whatever he had behind his back  ˓˓ hm? ʾʾ was your reply- moving so you would be sitting at the edge of the window sill, your tail wrapping around the handle of the window to ensure that you wouldn't fall however you could only stay in that position for a little while as your dear Lucifer beckoned you down to which you happily obliged.

     Landing right by Lucifer, you and him both shared a smile- your one being more of a grateful smile as he did save you from your anxiety fueled thoughts. ˓˓ Hello Luci!.... what is that behind your back. ʾʾ at that question Lucifer smiled even more, chuckling to himself ˓˓ geeze aren't you curious today? ʾʾ he spoke while trying to hide what he had, you were trying to move around him so you could see what he had in his hands ˓˓ Just let me see for hell's sake ʾʾ you were determined to see what it was, and Lucifer- feeling ever so merciful today- grabbed your wrist to crease your movement ˓˓ Okay, okay [nick name] I'll show you ʾʾ finally! he was going to show you

     It was no surprise to you that what he pulled out was indeed a little duck, but what was different was that this duck looked a lot like you- like really a lot like you. ˓˓ You.. made this? ʾʾ examining the little duck, you smiled at how carefully it was made made- the small details that the duck was designed with matched your visage perfectly, you could immediately see that Lucifer put a lot of time and care into this.. that is so sweet.. ˓˓ yes, why? do you not like it ʾʾ the joy in his voice seemed to falter ˓˓ I love it Luci, it's so beautiful ʾʾ looking up from the duck you faced Lucifer's slightly shocked yet pleased smile ˓˓ I'm glad you like it, I know the both of us have been dealing with quite a bit with our anxiety and stuff so... I sort of made this for you try and remind you that hey! you're not alone! The two of us will always have each other right? ʾʾ he rambled, a golden hue on his face- did he find this embarrassing? he really shouldn't, this gift was not only adorable but so incredibly delightful

     ˓˓ of course! Of course we'll have each other- geeze Luci, this is so sweet what the fuck? ʾʾ instinctively you hugged Lucifer tightly, an action he happily returned. You stayed like that for a few minutes before you pulled away ˓˓ now I defiantly need to make something for you ʾʾ ˓˓ you dont have to! ʾʾ  ˓˓ I sure as fuck do! ʾʾ you laughed, quickly speeding away to start working on something for Lucifer while he tried to catch up to you to try and stop you.

[sanaxo-o]

How about you? (Lee Hyunjae)

Genre/Warnings: strangers to kind of friends (?), mentions of reader being drunk, office worker hyunjae and reader, fluff, comfort, Hyunjae is down bad for the reader :), if you guys want a sequel then let me know! I got butterflies writing this short story but idk if it would be the same for you guys lol

Word count: 1,389

Sana: of course I had to write on the song TBZ just released. I am totally NOT procrastinating on my series (I am) I promise I will write the next part soon but since I am in Goa I had to write something for Hyunjae since he is so summer coded for me <3 (this is not a summer based fic…) thank you @o-onikix for beta reading even tho you didn’t really add anything 😐 (she was so sweet. She said this fic is perfect). Proofread once so plz let me know if there are any mistakes lol

Tagging: @cloverdaisies @kimsohn @mosviqu special tag for @from-izzy (plz tell me you’re alive) @deoboyznet @a-dream-bookmark

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Sitting in his chair, Hyunjae couldn’t help but feel his heart flutter every time he glanced at you.

This was something he never thought he would feel for you out of all the people from the office.

It’s not like you were bad or something, he just didn’t know you well enough to think he would catch such feelings for you.

You were not strangers nor were you both friends. You both just had a mutual understanding of each other’s existence and said hi or hello when passing by.

I mean yeah, you were pretty and you had a cute laugh but that's besides the point.

He only came to know about these feelings after having a proper conversation with you at the company dinner.

The way your drunk body kept on leaning against Hyunjae made his cheeks heat up as he held onto you tightly to make sure you didn't fall down.

He still remembers the way you kept on mumbling to yourself quietly with that small pout on your lips as you sat beside him with your red cheeks.

He never thought he’d be bothered about your muttering like this, but here he was, finding those small little things about you adorable.

Looking up from his computer screen Hyunjae could feel his heart take a leap when you looked up and made eye contact with him.

Immediately flashing you a nervous smile he could feel fire seeping out of his ears out of embarrassment for smiling so weirdly.

Bringing his hand up to his chest he held it over his heart as he felt his heart beating at a fast pace.

Leaning back in his chair, Hyunjae couldn’t help but let out a small squeal when he thought back to the moment when you looked him in the eye.

The way you just looked so effortlessly beautiful in your outfit with your hair tied up in your claw clip…

He admired you for putting so much effort and thought into your outfits everyday in the morning and coming all presentable.

He looked forward to seeing you everyday, that was one of the reasons he got out of his bed. Despite dreading the work piling up on his desk he couldn’t help but just think about you.

He hates to admit it to himself, but he totally does think about you every night. The way your face flashes before his eyes the moment he closes them makes him wide awake as he thinks about how it would be like to spend his days with you.

You were such a stranger to him but now? You were more than that. If you were to be a stranger to him then you were a pretty stranger for sure.

Despite the strong feelings he has for you, deep down he is afraid to even take a step closer towards you and make a move on you.

He’s afraid that he might make you uncomfortable, of course he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable or anxious.

Standing up with a smile, he walked towards the lunchroom to make himself a cup of coffee. If he wanted to get through the dreadful day (not so much since he saw you) he would at least need a cup of coffee by his table.

Entering the area he could feel his heart stopping as he saw your struggling figure trying to grab the coffee box from the cabinet which was placed at the very back of the cabinet.

Taking slow and steady steps towards you he immediately caught onto you mumbling to yourself and cursing at the person who placed it in that place.

Chuckling a bit, Hyunjae stood behind you and grabbed the box for you.

Turning around you were immediately greeted by Hyunjae’s chest as he stared down at you with a smile while placing the box beside you on the counter.

“Thanks…” you mutter as you grab the coffee box and scurry away from there to make yourself some coffee.

Seeing the way you got embarrassed so quickly made Hyunjae giggle at your shy form.

He didn’t know where he got the confidence and courage to do that from but he knew he had to interact with you in some way.

Walking towards you he took a seat on the chair which was in front of you as he saw you making some hot cup of coffee for yourself.

Looking up at him you smile at him shyly and continue stirring your coffee, too shy to look him in the eye because of the moment back there.

“Isn’t this your second coffee of the day? And it’s only 2…” hyunjae mumbles to you as he stares in your eyes lovingly.

You chuckle shyly at his words and drink some of it, “I always drink a lot of coffee to get through the day.” You tell him while cleaning the place, not wanting to leave any mess behind.

“I don’t think that’s good for your health though.” He says while staring at your cleaning the place. Standing up from the chair, Hyunjae took it upon himself to help you clean as he told you to drink your coffee before it gets cold.

Seeing the hesitation on your face, Hyunjae gave you a small smile and told you not worry too much as he continued with what he was doing.

“Ah and I am sorry…” you mumble to him as you take a small sip of the coffee while staring at his broad shoulders.

Hearing you say those words Hyunjae’s ears immediately perk up in confusion as he stares back at you for a moment as he opens his mouth to say the obvious question, “What are you sorry about?” He questions as he dries his hands and sits in front of you.

“The night at the company dinner, I was all drunk and acting all clingy to you. I am sorry if I possibly made you irritated or uncomfortable.” You apologise formally as you look down in shame and embarrassment.

Hearing you say that Hyunjae couldn’t help but chuckle quietly. He couldn’t help but think just how adorable you looked while apologising for something he didn’t even mind.

In fact he was glad that he talked with you that night, you were drunk so you wouldn’t remember much of what you guys talked but just that small moment you guys shared at the dinner made him want to get to know you more and that was enough for him.

“It’s okay, I found you rather cute.” He said softly as he stared at you as your face turned a shade of pink because of his sudden compliment.

“Thanks I guess…” you mumble shyly as you scratch the back of your neck while looking away from Hyunjae.

“Uh…” Hyunjae stared at you anxiously as he thought back to the words he wanted to say to you, “Are you…free on Saturday night?” He asked shyly.

You look at him with your eyes widened slightly as you let out a small cough, Hyunjae couldn’t help but find that action of yours adorable as he giggled.

Maybe taking a step closer towards you like this wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

“Uh yeah sure…I will send you my address.” You mumble in a hurry as you scurry off from there, too nervous to look at hyunjae.

He looked at your figure as you walked away, the way you stumbled on your way to your seat and the way you smiled slightly to yourself was just so effortlessly beautiful in a way that calmed his heart down.

He just couldn’t find it in him to take his off the small gesture you do, the way you always scratch the back of your neck when you’re embarrassed or when you always mutter under your breath when you’re annoyed or angry at something or someone.

Those little things stay in his mind all day, all circling around his head.

“She said yes…” he muttered to himself. Squealing like a small child Hyunjae couldn’t help but giggle at the thought of you. Again.

“I think I am in love with her. Argh…” yelling in a low voice Hyunjae brought his hands up to hide his face which was starting to flare up in a bright shade of red.

[ggundeuri]

jeongin x reader - "firsts are the worst"

pairings: skater!jeongin x fem!loner!reader

genre: romance, fluff, dash of angst, childhood friends to lovers, highschool!au

warnings: reader is socially anxious, making out, jisung + minho (with his girlfriend) make an appearance

word count: 6.4k

summary: jeongin and you have seen each other almost every day since you were kids. that is, until he made new friends - cooler friends. will the two of you reconcile, or will you spend the rest of the school year hiding out in the toilets?

a/n: the first of the high school sweet hearts series !! this is a wholesome one to start off with but i'm so excited to start working on the rest >:))

masterlist - series masterlist

reblog if you enjoy!

“Y/N! You’re going to be late!” 

You make a dash for your backpack in the corner of your room, ramming your shoulder into the doorframe on your way out. It doesn’t hurt, you’ve done it so many times. You take care not to fall down the stairs in your rush and opt to pull your shoes on today - thank god you left the laces tied up.

Your mother waves a lunchbox in your face, “You need to stop doing that, I can’t afford to keep buying you new shoes."

You’re already opening the front door when you snatch it from her, “Just take it out of my allowance.”

“Have a good first day!” she calls out to you, her voice growing quieter as you burst into a run.

“I’ve done it many times before,” you think to yourself, glad that you didn’t have time to say it to her out loud. She’d clip you round the ear for it.

Rounding the corner, you let out a sigh of relief when you see the bus just pulling up to the stop. And Jeongin is there too. 

You barrel into him, almost knocking him over in the process as you use him to break your sprint. You were never very good at slowing down, anyway. He’s gotten very good at catching you these past few years, always holding you at arms length by the shoulders. 

It’s different this time, though. You only saw him just last night, but today was your first day of your last year of high school. Maybe he had just forgotten over the summer, but this time his hands land firmly on either side of your waist. It feels weird… different, but it does the job. You pull away and try not to think about it.  

“Late on the first day?” he tuts at you, taking a step back to let you on the bus first as the doors open.

“Wow, such a gentleman,” you retort, making your way to your favourite seat at the back corner of the bus and waiting for him to sit down next to you before you continue, “At least I wasn’t waiting there for ten minutes like a loser.”

“It was only five today,” he huffs.

“Oh, an improvement from fifteen the other year. It’ll be zero next year,” you grin.

He squints at you, “There is no ‘next year’.”

“Right, so my mother keeps reminding me,” you roll your eyes, watchful of how he opens his mouth, hesitating for a moment to say something, “And you better not start harping on about applying to university, too.”

The rest of the ride is spent in silence. So is the walk into your all too familiar school. It’s not a good silence, but not a bad one either. When you’ve seen someone every day for the past seventeen years, you run out of things to talk about. But you liked the silence, it was comforting. Especially on your first day. 

Nothing has changed - the hallways are the same, the people who pass you, your locker code. Hell, you even have the joy of keeping your chemistry teacher from last year. Still, you couldn’t stop your heart from leaping out of your body with every step you took. Your voice cracked when speaking to the teachers, your hands shaky when you received your timetable. 

In three years of high school, the only friend you had was Jeongin, and you were lucky enough to be placed in the same classes the entire time. Your luck had to run out at some point, though, and you absolutely dreaded the waiting game you had to play on this day, every year, to find out if you were going to be a loner or not.

“Firsts are the worst,” you sighed, already holding your timetable out to him as you finally retreated from your teachers’ gaze. 

He grabbed the sheet of paper from you, holding it next to his as his eyes scanned them. Peering over his shoulder, you felt your heart drop into your stomach. Snatching the two timetables from him, you looked closer as if it would change what you just saw.

“We have no classes together!” you whined, pushing his timetable into his chest.

“Are you really gonna miss me that much?” he laughed, “I see you, like, every day after school anyway.”

“How does this school even have enough people taking media studies for there to be more than one class?” you look up at him with a frown.

“Calm down,” he awkwardly pats your back twice, “It’s not the end of the world.”

“It is!” you pinch your nose bridge between your fingers in a feeble attempt to calm yourself down, “I don’t have friends!”

“Well, maybe you can finally make some.”

“Says you,” you scoff, “you don’t have friends either.”

He purses his lips together, “Well, maybe this will be a learning experience for the both of us.”

So the two of you began your first ever school day apart. You made a point of picking the most isolated seat in every class - usually a table in the back corner. You knew you weren’t going to be able to make any friends, so you thought that keeping to yourself was the best option. You just about manage to make it to lunch without bursting into tears, although you were close several times, but the thought of seeing Jeongin again kept you going.

[You] usual place?

[Jeongin] actually i’m gonna hang out with minho today

[You] minho?? the kid who always wears that old leather jacket

[Jeongin] yes, minho

[You] i wonder how old it is, actually

[You] let me know if it smells

[Jeongin] no smell

[You] how did you even end up hanging out with him

[Jeongin] he sat next to me in maths

[Jeongin] did you not make any friends?

[You] what do you think?

[Jeongin] you’re free to join us

[You] thanks but no thanks

[You] i’ll see you after school

Refusing to wait even a second to read his reply, you dropped your phone into your backpack and slung it over your shoulder. Your media teacher kept talking as the bell rung, music to your ears, but you were quick to file out with the rest of your classmates. You felt free as you finally stepped out, merging into the background with every other student in the school that bustled into the corridor. 

You quickly put one foot in front of the other. Just like the rare few days where Jeongin had been too sick to come in, you would retreat to the comfort of a bathroom stall to enjoy your lunch. Alone.

The end of the day finally rolled around and you followed the path you had taken after school every day for the past three years. Only someone was missing next to you. His absense weighed down on your shoulders even more when he was nowhere to be found at the bus stop. He was always there before you, always making sure the bus waited for you and scolding you for showing up at the last possible minute. The only reason you were on time today was because you were so eager to see him.

Did he go home sick? Had he finally had enough of you? You quickly propped your backpack up on the brick wall next to you, cursing yourself for ditching your phone underneath all your folders and textbooks. When you finally retrieved it, you weren’t surprised that the only notifications you had were from Jeongin - the ones that you had refused to read earlier.

[Jeongin] oh i think i’ll hang out with him and his friends after

[Jeongin] it’s the first day so we won’t have any homework

[Jeongin] i told my mother, i’ll see you at dinner anyway

It was bound to happen eventually, you thought. He was the more sociable one, always ordering at cafes or speaking to retail employees for you. You sometimes didn’t understand why he always preferred sticking with you instead of making other friends, especially when he did it so easily just today.

The bus journey home was silent, again. But it wasn’t the good silence. You made a mental note to bring earphones tomorrow, in case this happens again. Your mother greets you at the door with a slightly lopsided smile.

“You’re not going round Jeongin’s today?”

“Later. For dinner,” you slip out of your trainers using only your feet, not even sparing your mother a look as you make your way to the kitchen.

“Are you not going to tell me how your first day was?” she prompts, following you around like a lost puppy.

She only pries because she loves you, you know this, but after the day you’ve had, you don’t feel up to talking with her. You want to snap, but it would only result in an argument. You settle for something blunt, but not directed at her, “It was the worst.”

She sighs, “You say that every year.”

“Yeah?” you finally look up at her, away from the selection of snacks lined up in the cupboard, “Well, it was actually the worst. Jeongin and I aren’t in any of the same classes.”

“Oh, are you afraid, sweetheart?” she saunters over to you in an attempt to pull you in for a hug, but she’s done it too many times for you to not successfully sidestep away.

“Afraid? Me?” you scoff, “About what?”

“Well, you’re not going to be spending as much time with him this year… are you worried he’s going to forget about you?”

Not having picked a snack yet, you slam the cupboard door shut, “You forgot to buy poptarts.” 

She tried calling out for you, but by the time you had withdrawn to your room and made a point of closing the door with a bang, she gave up. She knew by now not to bother you when you were like this, knowing how you were aware of how childish you were being. At least she gave you that space.

Jeongin’s parents usually made dinner at 6:30pm. It was currently only 3:43pm. You didn’t have any homework to do, meaning the next three hours were about to pass very slowly. Usually, you and Jeongin would help each other out with homework, getting it done much quicker than most, before killing time together. Without him there to make a pillow fort with, to go on a walk with, to watch bad movies with… you finally realised just how lonely you were for the first time. If only you were good at making friends.

You fall backwards onto your bed, staring at the misshaped glow-in-the-dark stars plastered all over your ceiling. You had painted those with Jeongin when you were seven, your father letting the two of you take turns in sitting on his shoulders. Today was the first time in a while you had actually acknowledged they were there, their presence so normal to you that you had taken them for granted.

Jeongin didn’t show up to dinner that night, his mother welcoming you with a sigh, “He texted a couple minutes ago saying he was getting food with some other friends instead - he didn’t tell you?”

You shook your head. You would’ve known if he had messaged you. It’s not like anyone else does, anyway. 

“Honestly, he could’ve let me know earlier. Or he could have at least told you,” she continued to berate her son despite the fact that he wasn’t there to listen, “he’s never done something like this before, it’s beyond me.”

The two of you pinkie promised not to talk about it any more, agreeing that it would upset your stomachs too much to enjoy dinner. You ate with her, strangely happy to discuss how ridiculous the price of eggs were these days. You made sure to eat all the eggs on your plate after that. 

You would’ve preferred silence, but only the type of silence that could be achieved with Jeongin. Silence on your own was too much - you could hear all of your thoughts. But talking with his mother, helping her clean up, randomly deciding to bake cookies with her after, all of those things would have to suffice for now.

“They just need to cool down now… It’s getting late. Why don’t you go home and pop ‘round tomorrow to pick them up, okay?” she gestured to the tray of cookies on the stove top, the room still warm from all the heat escaping the oven she had opened seconds prior.

“Okay, I’ll be off then,” you announce, not even bothering to slip your trainers on properly as your house was only just around the corner.

[You] where were you today?

[You] your mother wasn’t very impressed lol

When you checked your phone the next morning, you were already at the bus stop. After his flakey behaviour the day before, you realised you might not be able to rely on him to keep the bus waiting for you. 

[You] helloooo?

[You] yang

[You] jeong

[You] in

[You] are u sick or something?

As the bus rolled to a stop in front of you, you thought about yesterday morning. Or, rather, all the details you thought you could ignore. It wasn’t just that his hands landed on your waist; you saw how he looked at you differently, his pupils dilating even though he feigned annoyance, his ears growing red at his brazen action, the way his hands hovered close to yours on the bus journey. Maybe he was ignoring you to play hard-to-get.

You struggled to comprehend it. Why was he suddenly acting like that towards you? Sure, everyone thought you were a couple, and the two of you often made jokes about it, but it was never something that you thought was on the cards, not with your childhood best friend.

If his goal was to play hard-to-get, he was certainly doing very badly. Or, very well. You hadn’t heard from him in weeks. Summer turned into autumn turned into winter. He never showed up to the bus stop in the morning or after school, nor did he ever respond to your texts. He was definitely very hard to get a hold of. 

Meanwhile, you were resigned to waking up early in order to catch the bus, struggling through your classes and your homework alone, spending lunchtimes in a bathroom stall, and scrolling through your phone for hours on end until it was time for bed. You usually struggled to sleep, the sight of the painted stars above only serving as a reminder of what you were missing.

It was those same painted stars you woke up to in the early evening, completely disoriented as to when and where you were. You could have sworn going to sleep at night, but your phone clock read 6pm. It was still light outside, as well - it was still summer. Your throat and mouth were dry, one of your socks missing in your bed sheets and your eyes puffy from sleep.

Knock knock.

Your head snapped up towards the door, suddenly remembering where you were.

“Honey, you should leave soon if you want to eat dinner at Jeongin’s,” your mother called.

Right, of course you had just fallen asleep. Jeongin would never do something like that, even if he had found other friends. But it felt so real, it even felt like months had gone by in the few hours you had been unconcious. 

You remembered what your mother said to you about being afraid, shaking your head in disgust at the thought of her being correct. You had to pretend you were still mad at her for not buying poptarts, after all. 

Reluctantly standing up, you felt something roll off the bed with you, landing softly on the floor. It was your fox plushie - Yangie. You weren’t the type of person who collected stuffed toys, but this one was gifted to you by Jeongin for your birthday a couple years ago. He said he bought it because of how much you loved foxes, never questioning why you named it after him, or how you always kept it next to your pillow. 

“Tell Jeongin he can come over tomorrow, okay?” she reminded you as you slipped your shoes on, only semi-satisfied with how you readjusted your appearance after your nap, “I’ll be making his favourite.”

“Don’t worry,” you sighed, “at this point, he knows he’s allowed over, anyway,” you reminded her - this had been the routine for nearly the past two decades, after all.

“Oh, and don’t do what you did last time, okay? If you’re going to stay over, at least text me.”

You rolled your eyes at her. Whenever you went around Jeongin’s for dinner, you usually ended up sleeping over. His bed was bigger and comfier, and you had left some of your clothes and duplicate toiletries there. Sure, your house was only around the corner, but you would usually get too lazy, huddled up under his blankets watching a film. 

How you two had managed to ignore your feelings for each other for this long was beyond your parents. 

“That was one time,” you mumbled under your breath, quickly stepping out an shutting the door behind you before she could respond.

The front door to Jeongin’s house was already unlocked, his mother fully aware that you were coming over.

“Oh, Y/N, we were wondering where you were,” she hears you immediately, scurrying out of the kitchen with a steaming bowl in her hands, quickly placing it on the table, “we were starting to think you weren’t coming.”

You look over at Jeongin, his eyes trained on you as you walk around to your usual spot. You don’t miss the way his lips slowly curl up into a smile and how he pulls the chair out for you. He’s done it plenty of times before, but it feels different today. Like he’s trying a little harder.

“Sorry, I fell asleep,” you chuckled, “my mother had to wake me up.”

“Rough first day?” his mother chuckled, taking her own seat opposite you, “I thought you two might be tired, having to adjust to the school schedule again, so I made hangover soup.”

“We’re not even hungover,” Jeongin pointed out, reaching for the serving spoon anyway, “Y/N, pass me your bowl, I’ll serve you first.”

You noticed how his mother eyed up all of his movements, slowly nodding her head in approval.

“Don’t worry, whenever I experience my first hangover, I’ll come to you,” you joked, exchanging a knowing glance with Jeongin’s father. 

He never usually said or did much, and everyone usually forgot he was there, but he was cool. He was the one who bought the two of you alcohol as a reward for making it through the semester, and always gave you a lift home if you missed your bus - which happened a lot. And he never told your parents. 

“So, Innie, are you going to take Y/N with you tonight?” his mother asked once every one had started eating. 

You look up at her in confusion before turning to Jeongin for an explanation.

“Did you not see my texts?” Jeongin raised an eyebrow at you.

“No,” you said in between mouthfuls, “I was asleep, remember?”

He rolled his eyes, “Have a look.”

You quickly apologised to his parents for taking your phone out at the dining table, aware that they probably didn’t mind at your age anyway, before having a look.

[Jeongin] so we went roller skating

[Jeongin] remember how i mentioned i always wanted to try it

[Jeongin] they’re going to be at the skate park near our street after dinner. do you wanna come?

“Oh, yes, I remember,” you tried your best, and failed, to refrain from laughing, “You blew your monthly allowance on a pair of roller skates and gave up as soon as you fell on your face.”

“Hey!” he pouted, “I have a scar from that now, you know?”

“Of course I know,” you look over at him for a brief second, instantly pinpointing the small, white scar peeking out from under his fringe.

He looked over, your eyes meeting for a moment before you turned back to your food. You stared at him a lot - whenever you wanted to scare him or if you were just zoning out, but it felt weird to look at him for too long now. You were worried he would get the wrong idea… or maybe the right idea. 

“Anyway, do you wanna come?” he asked again.

“I know nothing about skating, Jeongin,” you pointed out, “I don’t even have roller skates.”

“Just trust me,” he pleaded, “Minho’s girlfriend said you could borrow her skates, she’s your size.”

“You’ve known them for a day and they already know who I am?” you voiced out loud, more for yourself than for him.

“Oh, of course he has,” Jeongin’s mother inserted herself into the conversation, probably growing tired of watching your juvenile back and forth, “He talks about you all the time, I’m not surprised.”

“Mom!” he groaned.

“What? It’s true,” she pointed out, “I think it’s only gotten worse today because you two aren’t in the same classes.” 

“Tell me about it,” you prodded at your food, “it was hell, today.”

“Yeah, I wanted to try spending break without you for a change, but it just felt wrong,” he admitted, but you could see how he was trying his best to ignore his ears turning red.

“Oh, how sweet~” you cooed. 

“Stop.” 

His father was kind enough to change the subject, asking about the people in your new classes before abruptly standing up, announcing he was going to start tidying up. Jeongin’s mother followed suit, collecting all of your empty dishes; his father always insisted on cleaning up to return the favour of his wife cooking, but she always tried to fight him over who should do it. It was a something you had seen many times, but it still had you in awe of them to this day.

“So,” Jeongin stood up, pushing his chair out with an unsavoury scraping noise, “are you coming?”

You shrug, trying to look like you weren’t putting too much thought into it, “Sure.”

The truth was that you were actually very nervous. You didn’t like hanging out with new people, hence why Jeongin was your only close friend, but you also didn’t wanna pass up on the opportunity to spend time with him. It felt a bit pathetic, since you see him every day, but if your dream taught you anything, it was that you couldn’t let him out of your sight.

Without saying another word, he hurried to the door and picked up his skates, which had now found their place among the rest of his shoes. They looked almost the same as when you had first seen them; they were white with teal blue accents, only now they had gained a few more scratches and scuffs.

Once you had left, you asked, “So, who’s actually going to be there?”

“Minho, his girlfriend, and his friend Jisung.” 

“I still can’t believe Minho has a girlfriend. He just doesn’t seem like the type,” you mention, “Wasn’t he, like, a player?”

“I guess so. I didn’t really think about it - he’s actually quite nice, especially to his girlfriend,” he explained.

You sucked in a breath through your teeth, “I’m fine with your parents, but I don’t know if I can sit through more people being lovey-dovey.”

“Don’t worry,” he chuckled, shoving his hands in his pockets and looking at his feet for a moment, thinking of what to say, “we can always ditch and spend time together, just the two of us. Like usual.”

“Honestly, after today, that’s all I want.”

“Was it actually that bad today?” he asked.

“Well, the classes were fine. We don’t usually talk during those anyway,” you started, “But I spent lunch in a toilet stall.”

“In a toilet stall?” he scrunched up his nose in disgust.

“What? I do it every time you’re not in.”

He shrugged it off, “Sounds like you, though. Continue.”

“I was a bit upset when I found out you weren’t getting the bus home after school, but that’s on me for not checking my phone,” you started recounting your day. It was the first time you had to do this in a while, since he was usually there with you, “And then I had that nap, but I had the worst dream ever.”

“You? Had a bad dream?” he questioned, “You only ever have weird dreams - what happened?”

You started chewing at your lower lip, wondering if you could get away with making up the dream, or if you should just finally tell him the truth. Luckily for you, you had just turned the corner at the end of the street and came face to face with none other than Lee Minho.

“Oh, hello there,” he smiled, not even remotely startled as he took a step back to get a better look at you, “Jeongin’s friend… sorry, what was your name again?”

“Y/N,” you introduce yourself with an awkward smile, unsure of what to say next.

“Y/N! Have you skated before?” he asked, leading the way to the park.

You shook your head, “When I was, like, seven.”

“This will be fun, then,” he grinned, “Jeongin started during lunch today and fell over instantly.”

“Hey, I’m better now!” he complained.

Minho patted him on the back with a laugh, “You improved a lot already, don’t worry.”

“Really?” you perked up at the common interest of teasing Jeongin, “I find that hard to believe.”

He rolled his eyes at you, “I’ll just show you.”

When the three of you arrived at the park, you noticed two kids sat on the edge of the skate pool - a boy and a girl you recognised from your year. They stood up and made their way to you, panic surging through your veins as you realised you would have to make conversation with them, too. You knew the boy was Han Jisung; he was in your maths class with Jeongin last year, making innuendos and silly faces whenever the teacher turned her back. You had only ever passed the girl in the corridors between classes, but you assumed she was Minho’s girlfriend.

“You’re late,” she commented.

Minho scratched the back of his head, “We’re here, though.”

“At the cost of my sanity,” she looked over at Jisung, “he keeps going on about that girl in his English class - he’s only known her for a day!”

Minho shook his head, “Come on, you don’t want to scare Y/N off now, this is her first time skating.”

“Oh, right,” Minho’s girlfriend held up her rollerskates, “You might need these.”

You sat down with Jeongin to put on the skates, struggling to do up the laces tight enough. Without saying a word, he knelt down in front of you and diligently tightened the laces before neatly doing them up in a double knot. He made sure both sides of the bow were an equal length before getting up, quickly finding his balance. It reminded you of when you were younger and still struggled to tie up your laces - he was always ready to tie them up neatly, playing with the loops as if they were rabbit ears.

Putting your hands flat on the ground either side of you, you attempted to push yourself up, panicking when your feet started sliding away from you and instantly sitting back down again.

“How the hell am I supposed to get up?” you sighed, staring at the rollerskates in defeat.

Jeongin looked over at the others behind him, occupied in deep conversation in the middle of the skate pool, before turning back to you and holding out his hand, “Hold on to me.”

Using both your hands, you gripped onto his arm and trusted him to pull you up. Your feet started sliding out from under you again, threatening to send you to the floor on your back, but Jeongin quickly grabbed your shoulder with his free hand, keeping you steady. With him holding onto you, you felt a lot safer - braver to stand up properly. 

Eventually managing to stand up straight with the help of clinging onto his shoulders, you smiled, “That was terrible.”

“Don’t worry, that was probably the worst part,” he laughed, looking at your hands still resting on his shoulders.

Blood instantly rushing to your cheeks at your close proximity, you quickly let your hands fall back to your sides. You realised your mistake only when you started to feel yourself lean forward, the skates slowly rolling backwards. You quickly clung onto his jacket for support while his hands landed either side of your waist, just like they did at the bus stop in the morning.

“How have you not fallen over yet?” you pouted, looking up at him and deciding against removing your hands.

“I actually fell over loads earlier today,” he admitted, carefully removing one hand from your side and rolling up his sleeve on his other arm to reveal a nasty graze spanning half of his forearm, “I did this after school today.”

Forgetting your own worries of falling over, you grabbed his arm to take a closer look, “Did you clean it? You could get an infection.”

He nodded, “Yeah, I did, don’t worry, Mom,” he laughed.

You sighed, pulling his sleeve back down to look at him, “If I get injured, I’m gonna kill you.”

“I know,” he pursed his lips together, “so I’m not gonna let that happen.”

He skated backwards a little, his hands slowly sliding up your sides and down your arms until he could hold both of your hands. He held on tightly, moving even further back so that he dragged you forward, doing all of the work for you.

“Do you think you can move on your own?” he asked.

You shook your head.

He lead you to the lampost nearby, gesturing at you to hold onto it. It was cold, and although it was arguably a much more steady object than Jeongin, you would have preferred to keep hanging onto him.

“You can start slowly, but you need to face your feet outwards and move like this,” he demonstrated by skating around the lampost, “And try not to lean forward, even if you feel like it will help.”

He came back to you, carefully taking one of your arms and linking it through his. You copied him, gradually moving faster as your confidence grew with Jeongin by your side. When he unliked your arms, you finally found it in you to stand on your own. 

He made his way back to the lampost, your heart sinking a little when you realised your only support was no longer within arm’s reach, “Do you think you can skate over on you own?”

“No, but you’re gonna make me, aren’t you?” you sighed.

“Yep,” he nodded, “Don’t worry, I’ve got you.”

Letting out a scoff, you started moving towards him, surprised at how easy you found it. Sure, it wasn’t much, but the fact that you were doing something you were certain you wouldn’t be able to was exhilirating. You manage to make it over to him in once piece before your face dropped.

“How do I stop?”

You found at your answer when you held out your arms for support, your hands landing firmly on Jeongin’s shoulders again and pushing him into the lampost. It wasn’t ideal, but you did eventually come to a stop.

Burying your face in his shoulder in embarassment, you mumbled a quiet “sorry” before looking back up at him. A small chuckle escaped his lips, his eyes creasing as a smile slowly spread across his face. You always admired how he looked when he smiled; after all these years, the fox remained your favourite animal, their faces reminding you of Jeongin when he was happy.

“See, you did it! We can work on teaching you how to stop another time,” he suggested. 

“Yes, I think that’s enough for today,” you bit your cheek as you looked away, in disbelief at how you were just gushing over your best friend’s smile.

His friends were disappointed to see the two of you leave so soon, making you promise to hang out with them another time. You decided to go back to his house, remembering to send a text to your mother about how you would be staying over. Jeongin quickly led you to his room, eager to avoid the barrage of questions his own mother probably had for him.

He instantly starfished on his bed while you shut the door behind you and carefully sat down next to him, flicking his forehead. He simply turned to you with a frown, used to your antics.

Suddenly, he sat up and faced you, “What was your bad dream?”

Unsure of how to respond, you could only stutter quietly, “What?”

“You were telling me about that dream you had during your nap - what happened?” 

“I don’t know,” you lied, “it was just a dream - I don’t really remember it.”

He looked at you for a moment, squinting in disbelief before shrugging, “You wanna watch a movie?”

You didn’t even respond, simply moving further up his bed and getting comfy under the covers. He took that as his answer, getting up to retrieve his laptop. 

You opened your eyes, struggling to adjust to the darkness that suddenly surrounded you. The only light you had was the laptop in front of you, the screen asking if you were still watching, and the faint glow of a streetlamp outside pouring in through the window. It was still open, the curtains undrawn and gently swaying in the late summer breeze. You tried to move, but two arms firmly wrapped around your body prevented you from doing so. Even in his sleep, Jeongin was strong enough to hold on to you. 

His face was hidden in your shoulder, chest rising and falling steadily against your side. He looked so peaceful, you almost felt bad for disrupting him - but you really needed the toilet. Methodically extracting his arms from you, you carefully slid out from under the covers, relieved that you hadn’t woken him up.

When you returned, he was sat up waiting for you, his hair sticking up in every direction and his eyelids droopy, threatening to close.

“I thought you had left,” he laughed through slurred speech, reaching out to you.

Despite him probably not being able to see, you rolled your eyes anyway, “Never.”

Slipping back under the covers, he pulled you close to him again. It wasn’t unusual for you two to cuddle whenever you slept over, but only today had you realised how clingy he had become. Usually, it wouldn’t matter if you had drifted apart during the night, but in the past few weeks it was more normal to find him still grasping onto you, as if he feared that you would disappear.

The comment he made when you returned only confirmed that was how he felt, and it made your heart sink. You were so worried about losing him that you didn’t realise how he so obviously felt the same.

“Jeongin,” you whispered, hoping he hadn’t already fallen asleep yet, “can I tell you something?”

He only hummed, too tired to respond, but it was enough for you to keep going, “I dreamt that you disappeared - you found new friends and never talked to me again.”

It took him a moment, but he eventually lifted his head up, supporting himself with his arm, “Why would I do that?”

“You wouldn’t - I know,” you sighed, “But I couldn’t help it.”

“Do you know why I wanted to start rollerskating?” he suddenly asked.

You rolled over to face him, your eyebrows knitted together in confusion, “Bit random, but no.”

“We’ve known each other for so long, I feel like there’s not really anything I can do these days to impress you,” he admitted.

“So you chose skating?” you pointed out.

“Well, it’s fun,” he shrugged, “but you also called that one skater hot in that movie.”

You couldn’t help but laugh before the realisation hit you, “You wanted me to call you hot?” you sat up fully.

He winced at the sudden movement, “Maybe.”

“Okay, my turn,” you inhaled deeply, preparing yourself for what you were about to say next, “Do you think it would be weird if we dated?”

There was a pause, the curtains rustling being the only sound in the room. He pulled himself up and faced you, the faint light from outside softly lighting up his features. He was now wide awake, chewing at his lip in anticipation as he contemplated how to respond.

No words were said - they weren’t needed. Jeongin slowly reached out to tuck some of your hair behind your ear, smoothing it out after your sleep, before he rested his hand on the back of your neck. It was strangely intimate for the two of you. You knew what he was about to do, but you welcomed it. He leaned forward a bit but stopped, unsure if he should continue, so you helped him by closing the gap.

Your lips finally touched. Only now did you realise you weren’t sure what to do, with this being the first kiss for the both of you, but you soon found yourself melting into his touch. In that moment, your lack of experience, your bad dream, nothing mattered. The only thing you could think about was how his lips moved against yours, his tongue meekly begging to feel more of you. With his hand at the back of your neck, he desperately pulled you in closer as if it was possible for the two of you to become one.

Reluctantly, you pulled away for air. He rested his forehead against yours, panting slightly as he tried to catch his breath, “Was that weird?”

You shook your head, a smile forcing its way onto your face. He smiled back, a sigh of relief escaping his lips - the same lips you were kissing just a moment ago. You wanted to feel him again. He slid his arm around your waist once more, pulling you back down onto the bed with him.

Your first day back at school wasn't the worst after all.

“Will you go on a date with me, then?”

taglist - taglist is open!!

@sockjam @abi121 @chiimtopia @foxinnie8 @hanjistarss @sleepyleeji

[theamityelf]

One of Angie's assignments is to talk to three different classmates about their metaphysical beliefs for five minutes.

She catches herself looking for which of her classmates seem to have the weakest convictions in that regard, and she changes tack.

The point of the assignment is to hear them out, to not try to sway them to her beliefs. The De-Rad teacher has insisted multiple times that it's important to make peace with the fact that she can't control others' thoughts and opinions. She shouldn't want to. It isn't healthy.

Angie gets through a conversation with Kaede, who is vaguely spiritual but not especially religious, with only a few impulses to interject, which she does not indulge.

This victory makes her a little too confident. She talks to Miu next, and her staunch atheism makes Angie anxious. With every sentence, she feels as if she is letting Miu walk farther and farther onto train tracks. The longer it goes on, the more she feels as if Miu is pulling her onto the tracks, with her.

But the five minutes pass, and Angie hasn't interrupted. She thanks Miu for her time and goes off to the art room and says a prayer. It starts off as a string of apologies, before she can calm herself down and pray normally.

She procrastinates on picking a third person. She stays in the art room for the rest of her free period, meaning she'll have to wait until after school. She goes through her afternoon classes in a daze.

When classes end for the day, she looks at all of her classmates, gathering their things to leave, and she can't bring herself to pick someone. She goes back to the art room, as conscious of her own heartbeat as if Miu has just given her an encore.

She finds Nagito in the art room, and her mood lifts at once. "Nagito-senpai!"

He smiles back. "Good afternoon, Angie. I thought I might bump into you, here. I was wondering if you've finished your De-Rad assignment yet."

"Two out of three!" she half-sings, showing him her notes.

"Impressive. To be honest, I haven't gotten started yet. But I thought I could make you my first of the five-minute interviews. Would that be alright with you?"

It never occurred to her that she could use her De-Rad classmates, too. She took "classmates" to mean the other members of her year. "Of course!" she says. "And Nagito can be Angie's third!"

"What an inspired idea!"

She's sure she only said what he was already thinking, but she allows him to give her credit.

"You can go first," he says.

So, she talks for five minutes, watching him take notes all the while. The catharsis of it is a big relief, after spending so much of the day in unspecified dread.

It isn't entirely easy. While the assignment of course doesn't place any limitations on the people they interview (meaning she can really say whatever she wants to right now), she still honors the spirit of the rules by not letting herself preach, not letting herself try to influence him. She talks about God as she sees God, and doesn't try to lure Nagito in with the appeal of what God could be to him. (And...toward the end, she lets herself sound uncertain. She's been studying the history of her island recently, and how the traditional practices of her island were misappropriated in the past. In class, they've been studying the behaviors of cults. She's still finding the best way to engage with her faith.)

When the five minutes end, she feels...vulnerable, but not quite so anxious.

"Your turn," she says brightly.

She listens to Nagito and takes her notes. His thoughts on hope and talent are interesting. There are moments when she smiles at a beautiful turn of phrase, and there are moments when she feels concerned about his mindset. But mostly she just feels very interested.

Is this how it's supposed to feel?

[perpetuelledaydreaming]

18 | chapter nineteenth

summary: Billy and you play house. Billy makes a nice save and he doesn't particularly like Craig.

warnings: implied smut. implied abused.

listen to: Pretty boy-  The Neighbourhood | Ocean eyes - Billie Eillish | R u mine? - Arctic Monkeys (playlist here)

Please go look at the playlist, I revamped it all so you can read the chapters with the new songs and also maybe give your guesses of what's coming next given the songs?

word count: 3.6k

series masterlist + read the next chapter early on my ko-fi!!

By Monday morning you weren’t able to walk straight, with Craig out on business, it allowed you to spend all the weekend with Billy. Billy and you had spent the weekend playing house, as Billy had teased on Sunday while he helped you cook Emily and Max dinner, who’d also spent a considerable amount in your house since Billy thought it could distract your sister. She thankfully did, plus blasting music throughout the house, so they couldn’t hear you scream, was also the best idea you had. 

You’d also got to know him even more throughout that couple of days. You realized that you truly loved talking to Billy, beyond the witty banter that the both of you carried, you got to know him even more. It was unsettling how comfortable he felt with you, how easily you created a routine. But either way, you loved it. The way that he sang along to certain songs to the point that you had to hold back a laugh, his competitive nature, his interest, and opinions, even on politics. Especially how he read to you.

It was a shame that the paradise that was created by both of you wouldn't last too long. 

Billy had sneaked out of your place around five that morning, aware that Craig might show up earlier than he’d said he would. You played with his golden necklace as your limbs were tangled in your bed while Billy passed his hand through your hair delicately as you asked him to leave a bit earlier and to try to keep the PDA at bay at school. 

He didn’t say anything, nor did he look hurt or annoyed but you still knew it bothered him slightly. 

Therefore, as you limped through the hallways you were secretly dreading two things: Seeing Billy’s hurt expression and running into Eddie, who was now aware of why you’d been MIA throughout the last part of the week prior. Robin had called you on Saturday night after Eddie had told her that you couldn’t hang out with them since you had a cold, at least, that’s what you’d told Bob when you canceled your shift after Billy had begged you on his knees not to go to Peaches, after he started to kiss you through your underwear, there was little that you could do. 

Eddie, though, he knew as he waited for you on the path to your locker. 

“We don’t have to talk about it,” you grumbled as you passed Eddie who was burning you with his eyes. 

“What the fuck? Of course, we do!” Eddie gawked at you, he followed you. “When, where, how?” he asked loudly as you looked back at him with a glare. 

“Eddie, stop it!” You bit back at him when you finally stopped at your locker. “And you already know where!”

Eddie scrunched his nose in disgust as he looked at you while your eyebrows quirked up. Eddie groaned loudly with a grim on his face as there was a hint of a smile on your lips. 

“Please tell me that at least the counter at Peaches hasn’t fallen victim to both of you,” Eddie muttered as he passed a hand through his face. 

He was so dramatic. 

“It hasn’t,” you lied as you recalled your first kiss with Billy and how he sat you on the counter. If you didn’t know any better, you would tell Eddie that it could soon be a victim too. Billy didn’t have self-control and apparently when it came to him, you didn’t have it either. “And please, stop talking about that. I’m nervous enough with the results,”

Suddenly, Steve and Robin made their way to your locker with anxious smiles. Robin launches towards you with a big hug as she holds your hand. 

“Are you ready?” she asked. 

You sighed as you shake your head slightly while Steve ruffled your hair slightly and then you turned to the right and he was right there. Billy’s eyes softened as his gaze met yours, he’d been nothing but supportive on Saturday night when you snapped out of your dreams as you recalled that the announcements on student president were made that day. There was a hint of a smile as he gazed at you through the crowd in the hallways while he pretended to listen to Carol talking. 

“Yeah,” you said as you gazed at Billy and nodded in acknowledgment. “I’m ready,”

As if you’d cue the principal, the speakers in the hallways let out a pitch before it turned off and you heard the school’s music for announcements.  

“Good Morning Hawkins High,” The principal said as your heartbeat began to raise. “First, the newspaper committee will be announcing their new members on Friday, following the next week there will be renovations,” you sighed as you gazed at Billy while you tried to block out the unimportant announcements. Billy motioned you to breathe and you followed suit, it felt like you were the only two people in the hallway.  

“Y/N!” Robin pulled you, you snapped your head towards her as you listened to the principal again, but your heart is beating way too hard in your chest, it was almost bursting. Your eyes met Billy’s again as the words of the director rumbled through the hallways. 

“And the winner of the run for president of the student body is,” 

You almost didn’t hear the principal calling your name, part because your eyes were linked to Billy’s and it seemed like they drowned everything out. It’s a blur, you don’t even notice the screaming and how your friends were shaking you until Eddie literally tackled your body and huddled with your other friends, effectively tearing your gaze away from Billy. 

“YOU WON!” Eddie screamed and Robin jumped around while hugging Steve.  

You erupted in laughter as you hugged and kissed your friends before jumping around with Robin, celebrating as much as you could while people began to chant your name near you. Suddenly, you felt a strong pair of arms around your torso pulling you away, you were being scooped into a tight hug, spinning you around happily as people in the hallway clapped and cheered for you. 

You didn’t need to see his face to realize it was him who’d picked you up. You felt his broad shoulders as you draped your arms around his neck, the scent of salty air and beach wrapping around you as he held you tightly with a wide grin. It was only until he settled down, with you facing him, that you realized what you’d done. 

Billy’s grin faltered a bit, his cheeks flushing as he looked around and let go of your hips. He turned to the crowd, they were staring at him as if he was insane, they were still clapping and cheering but slower than before, your friends had frowned as they gazed at both of you, Robin disgusted while Steve in shock. Eddie thought, he had a knowing look. 

“THERE’S GOING TO BE A PARTY, PEOPLE,” Billy screamed with a wicked smile. “COME ON!” he growled once more as he began to celebrate with other people. 

People soon Billy’s action and the crowd began to roar, they celebrated amongst themselves about the party as Steve handed in the flyers for it. Billy then returned to you, he gazed at you for a second while you shook your head with a slight smile. 

“Nice save,” you muttered, trying not to seem so close to him.  

Billy smirked as he discretely pinched your butt softly, you yelped at his movement, swatting his arm away as you glared at him before you returned to your friends. Although, Billy still noticed how your lips quirked up at his action as he shook his head and went to class. 

Billy didn’t see you again throughout the day. He wanted to be selfish. If he was being honest, he would’ve wanted to pick you up from the floor in that hallway and take you to his Camaro, making you scream his name before you fell asleep together. Billy’s memories of you throughout that weekend play on repeat in his mind. How he’d woken up with the sun rising in the Quarry, your body warm and soft against his. How you peered up at him with flushed cheeks and a relaxed smile as he brushed the stray hairs from your face while placing a soft kiss on your temple. 

The weekend definitely changed whatever previous dynamic you’d held. 

It was deeper, more real than before. 

Billy now wondered if he would ever be expected to wake up alone again. He loved spending time with you, he realized that beneath your icy exterior, there was so much warmth inside of you that washed over Billy. He loved it, he loved wrapping himself around you, always touching you. Face buried on your neck while your hair repeatedly tickled his nose, arms wrapped around your waist, leaving you no choice but to tickle him to wriggle your way out of his arms. 

Therefore it wasn’t a surprise when he went to the mall, bought some flowers and then drove to your place at eleven that same night. He’d climbed to the rooms of a couple of girls before, but usually, there wasn’t any bouquet of flowers or tape that he had to hold in his mouth as he pulled himself up to the roof that covered the porch while he gazed at the neighboring houses to be sure that no one would call Hopper and report a house invasion if they saw him.

He grunted slightly as he pulled his body up and carefully made his way to your window, looking through it. Billy gazed at you, pajama shorts and a sweater as you wrote in your notebook time and time again. You were too focused on whatever you were doing to notice him, brows and nose scrunching up as you read what you’d written and began muttering it out loud.  

He realized then that there was nothing more for him, no one else could make him feel like he felt for you. You were it for him. 

Billy smiled softly and finally tapped on your window. You jumped slightly at the sound and you frowned as you stared at him, while you realized that there were his blue eyes staring at you from outside. Quickly, you looked back to your door and then ran towards the window, curling your fingers and pushing it up with caution, praying that it didn’t make too much noise. 

“What are you doing?” you hissed as you opened the window to Billy. 

“Didn’t let me celebrate with you,” Billy replied as he stepped into your room trying to be as careful as he possibly could. “I had to bring the celebration here,” he sighed as he leaned down to the roof and took the flowers, presenting them to you with tape wrapped with them. 

Your heart hammered in your chest as he presented the bouquet of lilies and the tape. He’d recalled that you’d told him that your father used to bring lilies home when he arrived from a long trip or sometimes without reason. He’d remembered. 

“Billy,” you sighed as you stepped closer to him while holding the Lillies with watery eyes. 

“I really wanted to be with you all day,” he murmured as he towered over you. 

His scent drove your senses wild as he leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. It started soft, so soft that you wondered how Billy Hargrove, who could look so brute and harsh could be so delicate with you, so affectionate. One of his hands slid around to cup the back of your neck while you deepened the kiss. Your hands quickly draped over his shoulders, pressing yourself against him while he gripped the back of your thighs, lifted you, and let your legs wrap around his waist. 

It comes almost as muscle memory now, how it goes between the two of you. How he kissed you so deeply, how he felt so warm all the time, how his fingertips were the root of the goosebumps that covered your skin. You’re dizzy by the time you’d stopped kissing and Billy settled on your bed, his sitting down while you straddled his lap. 

Leaving the flowers on the edge of your bed, you pressed yourself harder against Billy while littering his face with soft pecks that made him hum contently. 

“Why can we just let this pointless rivalry go on?” you murmured against his lips, your fingertips caressing his face slightly. 

You knew you had to say it, you knew that you had to bring it up eventually because otherwise, Billy would go around thinking that nothing had changed, that you didn’t care for him as much as you actually did. 

“Baby,” Billy whined softly as he flushed his chest against yours. 

You nudged his nose softly with yours. “I told you I can’t, at least, not yet,” you replied. 

“Why?” he asked as he pressed a kiss to the corner of your mouth. 

Billy didn’t want to pressure you on this, afraid that he might scare you off, and yet, he knew he could handle not being able to express how he felt for you for so long. At least, he believed, he needed to know what was happening in your mind. 

You stared at him softly through your lashes as you trailed your fingertips over his nose and cheekbones. With a sigh, you pressed your forehead against his. 

“I’m scared,” you whispered so softly that Billy thought he hadn’t heard correctly at first. 

“Of me?” 

“No!” you hurried, shaking your head. “I’m scared of how my step-father could react if he found out,” you stated, nuzzling your head on his neck, trying to avoid his gaze. 

Billy frowned slightly at the notion that the only thing that could be stopping you would be your stepfather. He wondered if he would feel the same if his father found out, but honestly, Neil would be amazed that Billy had managed to make someone like you notice him. 

“Are you scared of him?” he asked as he passed a hand through your hair. 

There was a beat of silence in the air for a second as your eyes wandered to the small box on your desk. 

“Have you fucked up so badly before that you feel out of breath when they walk into the room because they might point out anything that you’re currently doing wrong?” you explained. “Have you ever felt so tense that your body aches as soon as you relax when they’re gone?”

There was no emotion as you stated it; you’d been wasting your tears and feelings when you were alone. But feeling Billy tensing up as he heard you, made you want to weep. 

The answer was yes. 

“Hey,” Billy muttered softly as he cupped your face and turned your head so you were looking at him, leaning a bit on the bed so his eyes met yours. “What’s wrong?” he asked staring at you, while you were teary-eyed. 

“Nothing’s wrong,” you murmured, seemingly holding back the tears. 

He couldn’t know, you weren’t ready. You’d been technically together for about five days, no one could know. Billy could see it, the walls standing strong in front of him as he gazed at you, he shook his head. 

“Then when?” 

You placed the heels of your hand on your eyes as if they could hide the tears that were brimming in your eyes. You believed that you were well past the tears when you realized the situation that you were in, and yet here you were holding them back so he couldn’t notice how much you were hurting. 

 “I don’t know but can you just trust me on this?” you stated as you stared at him softly. 

Billy sighed before leaning into you, pressing his lips against yours. 

“I get it, it’s annoying but I won’t force you to do anything if you’re not ready,” he agreed, glancing at your face with the most delicate features. 

“Thank you, 

You lifted your chin and pressed your lips against his. Billy kissed you tenderly in return, he snaked one arm around your waist, turning you around and placing you on your back as he continued to kiss you. If you’d kissed him that morning you met him, you wondered how much time would you have spent hating him. 

Not much, honestly. 

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as Billy grounded against you. 

And then you heard the faint footstep of someone climbing the stairs, his footsteps. Billy felt your whole body tensing up and how your breath became shallow for a second. 

“y/n?” It’s Craig. 

Billy turned towards your door and then to you before you climbed down his lap and closed the window. Billy stayed still for a second, unsure how to react to the panic drawn on your face, and now that you’d closed the only way he had to go out. Your eyes widened as you saw him waiting for you. 

“Shit, shit,” you muttered as you pulled Billy to the floor. “Hide underneath my bed, quick,” you ordered him as you jumped to your bed and tried to put your papers on the bed. 

Billy simply nodded as he laid down and rolled under your bed as you asked him to. By the time Craig opened the door, you’re sitting on your bed, re-reading one of your last drafts. 

“What are you doing?” Craig asked harshly as he curiously gazed at you and your room. 

He had been in a bad mood with you in the morning, especially when he noticed the pink slip on Emily’s backpack that mentioned that she’d been late one morning. He hadn’t been too kind to you after that but hadn’t done anything about it. 

“Practicing my speech for Friday,” you explained. 

The dullness in your voice made Billy frown as he waited patiently under the bed. He also realized that he didn’t particularly found pleasing Craig’s tone with you. Billy had never seen him and you hadn’t told Billy much about him, the only information he had was that you were somehow and for some reason scared of him, maybe he was strict. 

He hoped it was that. 

“Thought I heard you talking,” Craig muttered uninteresting as he eyed your room, he still had a glimpse of suspicion in his gaze but you refused to give in. 

“No, sir.”

He nodded curtly. “I’m going to sleep, is everything ready for tomorrow? I don’t want your sister being late again,” he stated through gritted teeth. 

You rolled your eyes at what’d happened. It wasn’t that you meant for it to happen, it slipped. “I told you that I had,” you began, annoyance dripping from your voice but then Craig’s voice ripped through your words. 

“Excuse me?” he roared as he watched you with flared nostrils. 

You held your breath for a moment, waiting for him to do something and praying that Billy wouldn’t pop out of your bed. Billy’s hands quickly turned to fists, holding them so hard that he was sure crescent moons would appear on his palms as soon as he let go. 

“I’m sorry. It won’t happen again,” you muttered. 

Craig nodded. “Fucking hope so,” he said. “Good night,”

“Good night,” you replied. 

Billy waited until Craig’s footsteps sound far enough away before he climbed out of your bed as you slumped on your bed, covering your face with your hands. It hadn’t been enough for him to know about what had happened, your relationship with Craig, how he abused you, you had never shared so much. No one had been close enough to you for them to know anything about Craig, your ex had only found out because he’d been almost a witness to what had happened.

“I don’t like the way he talks to you,” Billy stated as he sat down on the bed next to you while his hand climbed to your leg up and down, caressing your skin. 

“Don’t pay attention to him,” you sighed as you uncovered your face and moved to the side so Billy could lie down next to you. Billy took his jacket off and laid down next to you. 

He turned to his side as his hand continued to caress your skin while his eyes burn the side of your head. He watched you so carefully that you were afraid that he might read you, that he might find out. 

“Has he ever done anything to you?” he asked. 

It was never too far from Billy’s realm of possibility, with his father he knew what might happen to anyone else. It still made him sick to think that someone could harm him. 

You shifted on your bed, quickly draping yourself onto his chest before you kissed his pec softly over his shirt. Billy’s lips quirked as you looked up at him through your lashes. Billy rolled his eyes, leaned over, and kissed your lips softly. He brushed his fingers over your hair, smoothing it back off of your face. He was waiting for an answer but by the way, you’re avoiding the topic, he believed that it wouldn’t be something to talk about today. 

“Come here,” you muttered before you climbed from his chest and pressed yourself to him, kissing him harder. 

Billy relaxed as you climbed over him. Your lips left his as you pressed open-mouthed kisses on his jaw and then on his throat, moving your mouth down to the curve of his shoulder and back up to his jaw. Billy grounded himself against you, his hands lifting up to your chest before going back to your hips, holding you down so you could feel how hard he was already. You whimpered. 

“Baby,” you breathed out. “If you don’t stop, I,”

You gasped as Billy’s hand slipped into your underwear, sliding his fingers along your folds. 

 “Sh darling,” he cooed. “You have to be very quiet,”

***

author's note: honestly, november has been a bit of a shitty month for me so sorry for the delay. I hope you're enjoying our section of 'fucking like rabbits and try to have a healthy relationship'. Let's see how long it lasts (it won't last too long sorry) . thank you as always for your support. you make me really really happy

***

taglist: @happypopcornprincess @hannahnikohl @thescarlettvvitch @nymphadora000 @phishyie @amethystx3 @jaziscool @vixionix @gloryekaterina @alicetweven @frogtits1 @meg11 @pillowjj @fan1237 @bucky-daddy-barnes @starloriha @make-me-imagine @piper570 @dedicated2viktor @zanmorgan @queenofshinigamis @literally-a-ferret @slutformaddyperez @milkiane @mysterygirl-14 @oli-leo-ska @tsukibaby1 @samwilsonlove @theshinyrock @belledawnidk @the-mysterious-miss-s @rio-mx@nobody-000 @rlvslouis @linkpk88 @daygirl26 @steveharringtonswifey09 @alwaysbeenfamous @kazbrekkersangel @ilovewomen711 @allazay101 @finelineskies @dacresgff @nymphadora000 @that-levi-kenma-kinnie @riffcrusader @useless-snail @patheticreative @emmettcullenswife @milenadixon @whiskeypowder @ponyboys-sunsets @yunho-leeknow @kaillou66 @randomeddieblog

[orlissa]

Drabble prompt: snowed in

hope this helps with the writers block!

Day 6: Snowed In

The trip was a hard-earned one, requiring much reasoning, cajoling, and lobbying with the Tsar, not to mention all the precaution—all the planning and organizing and checking—that had to be taken once the permission had been granted.

But it was granted, and soon they were off to a secluded dacha up in the mountains, leaving in the dead of the night with only a small retinue of guards—the less people knew about it the better.

It was supposed to be a “training retreat,” as Aleksander had termed it—a way for the two of them to work together on her summoning, without distractions, without half the court watching, making her anxious and jittery. It was what the Tsar had approved, and what they actually set out to do. And what they did.

Only over the course of the week of their stay the pleasant, shared meals started to stretch deep into the night, sessions on the theories of the small sciences intermingled with personal conversation, rigid uniforms gave way to more relaxed clothing, and before she realized, they were spending the nights in the same room.

Not that she minded. In fact, she couldn’t recall a happier period in her life.

But of course all good things must come to an end, so she went to bed with a certain heavy melancholy on her mind on the seventh night.

…Only to wake up to a world dressed in white the next morning. Rushing to the window in her nightgown and pressing her face to the panes, wherever she looked all she could see was a deep layer of snow—she couldn’t even make out the road that was supposed to take them down the mountain.

“A good two feet fell during the night,” Aleksander said almost nonchalantly as he walked into the room in his banyan, a mug of most likely hot chocolate in both hands. He looked carefree, almost a little smug—almost as if the unexpected snowfall was his doing. “The roads are completely blocked. It’s going to be a couple of days before they are cleared.”

“What does it mean for us?” she asked, reaching for one of the mugs, barely able to keep a smile off her face.

“I’m afraid we’ll have to stay here for a few extra days,” he replied, sitting beside her on the window seat, “all on our own.”

“What a dreadful prospect.”

“Absolutely terrible.”

“Alone up in the mountains… what will we do to not go mad with boredom?”

His eyes twinkled. “I have a few ideas.” 

And with that he leaned in for a kiss.

[deadpuppetboi]

Goretober Day 11: Cluster

Angel is not a big fan of parties.

Even if they were his.

Angel despised large groups for reasons he couldn't properly convey to others.

Too many people huddled together, all in one location, with no way out. It didn't matter how huge the party or how vast the place was; it just made him anxious.

Today was one of, if not the most important days of his adolescence.

The months preceding up to it were spent planning, coordinating, and spending as much money as possible to throw the best birthday party ever. Or, in Angel's case, the finest Quinceaero he'd ever have because this was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity he couldn't pass up. The one day in his life that might pave the door for adulthood was thwarted by his overwhelming dread about what might happen next.

He was dressed in a white tuxedo with the color blue (his favorite color was black), and a light tint of makeup was applied to his face to mask his acne. Yet here he was, picking at them and hurriedly drying them off to escape the anguish that gripped his mind, body, and spirit. Two fingers pinching at random areas, forcing his skin out till the pus exploded like a rocket.

It was 10:46 p.m., not yet the conclusion of the party, and Angel was locked in the restroom, unsure whether he should spend the rest of the time there.

Thankfully, nothing has happened yet, but it hasn't stopped the adolescent from overthinking everything. From the moment he opened his eyes in the morning, he had kept them focused on everything that had happened since. From the food he ate to the suit he wore to the chapel to the party, and eventually every inch of this entire ballroom.

Everyone suspected he wanted to make sure everything was perfect, similar to how his mother did. But no one could see the teenager's paranoia, the reason he couldn't say anything without appearing nuts, so he relied on himself to make sure everything was done correctly.

However, the anxiety seemed to be getting to him, as another pimple popped and he hissed. As he turned the faucet and dipped his bleeding spot to fast dry off, the pain seemed like a slap in the face. His tired gaze shifted to the mirror in front of him, his reflection mirroring his tiredness from keeping up appearances all day till the party ended.

He'd done everything he could without fail, so today might as well be nothing, and he'd be secure for who knows how long.

A knock on the door, however, interrupted Angel's conflicting thoughts.

“Uh-yeah?”

“Angel, how long are you going to be in there? Everyone's waiting for you to open the present.”

Angel clicked his tongue, cursing himself before swiftly dressing himself. He made certain that anything bad was not just absent from his face, but also from his body language. He opened the door to reveal a young man dressed similarly to himself, but taller, with broad shoulders and relatively straight hair put back into a solid but tight ponytail.

Angel looked up at his older cousin with an apologetic expression, while Abel seemed dejected.

“What are you doing in there?”

“Contemplating whether or not I should just sleep the whole thing off on the toilet.”

Abel scoffed and rolled his eyes as he stepped to the side to allow Angel to pass through and follow him into the ballroom. The two simply paused as they walked across the carpeted carpet from below to the enormous entrances that brought them into the ballroom.

“You only get this day once, at least act like you can enjoy it.”

“I do like it.”

“Then stop staying away from everyone, you’re making yourself look bad.”

Angel sighed and clicked his tongue once more as they approached the huge doorway. He returned his gaze to his cousin, noticing something was wrong.

"What happened to your necklace?" Angel asked, observing Abel's usual symbol of a spiral had vanished.

"Ah, that?" Abel frowned at himself. "I had to put it away, the flash will catch onto the silver, and it'll ruin the entire picture."

“Ah, yeah, right, right.”

Angel gazed ahead through the glass entryway and paused, his gaze drawn to the vacant dance floor, where everyone was waiting for the birthday boy to arrive.

"Do you know what's in the present?"

Abel laughed as he shook his head.

"If I knew I wouldn't even bother to come get you."

Angel scoffed.

“Not even a hint?”

Abel smiled.

“Well, a little piece of me is in there, does that help?”

Angel laughed as well before getting himself together and putting on a respectable look before walking through the doors, Abel encouraging him with a pat on the shoulder. The deafening sound of hands hitting each other in various motions assailed Angel's ears immediately, forcing the entire ballroom to tremble violently. Angel struggled not to hide his ears and smiled as he strolled up to the dance floor, the cameraman approaching to examine him.

Among the applause came his parents, who both wished him well and thanked him for being such a good son. The adolescent thanked them and kissed them both before moving to the center of the dance floor. Now, out in front of everyone, the adolescent was preparing for his 'huge' present.

Angel covered his eyes to participate in the act, his ears picking up on the laughs and cheers from the audience. He only opened them when he heard his mother yell at him too. He set his hands down and gazed at the enormous present; anticipating it to be much smaller, he was surprised by its enormity.

The speaker summoned everyone's attention once more, bringing Angel to the forefront as the present was placed in front of him. Under the lights, a tall and slightly thin present covered in blue and white wrapping paper gleamed. It would have nearly blinded the adolescent if he hadn't grown accustomed to the lights as they were.

It was taller than him, possibly over six feet tall, and wide enough to resemble a grown man.

Angel quickly ran out of breath.

No way.

There was no way this was happening.

He couldn't have-

Angel could hear everyone encouraging him to open the present and see what was inside, while the music seemed to get louder with anticipation. But it was as if Angel couldn't hear the music, the cheers of the crowd, or even his parents' encouragement. All he could hear was his heartbeat, and his entire body was cold to the bone as he surveyed the entire scene.

He started looking around.

His little cousins ran around as others slept on fold-up chairs, his aunt and uncles cheered him on with their drunken laughter, and strangers he'd never seen or met before took out their phones to capture the event for themselves.

He appeared to be out of breath, one hand over his chest, the other shook slightly as it couldn't decide whether to stay down or reach over to open the present. Nothing else could get the adolescent to open the package because everything was so bright and so noisy.

But when he turned to look to his side, he noticed his older cousin standing on the far corner of the dance floor. Abel appeared concerned but kept his cool, mouthing some phrases for Angel to figure out for himself.

“Open,” he mouthed, “Open the present.”

Angel closed his eyes and exhaled deeply, calming his speeding heart and disordered mind.

Angel reached over, standing on his tippy toes, grasped the top of the present, and yanked it off with all the effort he could muster. The four strands of the gift immediately fell off, dropping in a heap on the dance floor, and Angel was surprised to see an even smaller present before him.

Everyone laughed.

Angel took a deep breath and laughed softly as he gazed around the room. He looked across to Abel, who appeared to be laughing as well, then shifted his gaze to motion Angel to continue unwrapping his present. Angel smiled confidently and continued unwrapping his present, displaying his newfound self-confidence.

Each layer was removed one by one, revealing an even smaller present wrapped in the same wrapping paper as previously. Nonetheless, Angel continued to open the presents until he was confident enough to realize that he had reached the final one.

It was a wrapped present that was roughly the size of a standard cardboard box. It looked like the ones used in moving firms, and Angel was familiar with them from utilizing them to build his cosplays. Angel wasted no time in reaching over and opening the final present to see what had been concealed from him for so long after hearing everyone cheer him on.

He virtually tore the top apart, his eyes wide with expectation as he leaned over to see inside, his entire body shivering with excitement.

Nobody could have witnessed what Angel saw at that moment. He had fully stopped for a moment, the pupils of his eyes shivering and the corners of his mouth twitching. He stepped back, dropping the top of the present, his formerly joyful countenance turning scared as he began to shiver from head to toe.

Before the box started moving, no one knew what to make of it.

Unexpectedly, the cameraman had moved over to investigate what was wrong, taking a look inside before responding similarly to Angel. Instead, he screamed, nearly stumbling over himself as he took a step back, a disgusted expression on his face. But before he could stop the video, everyone's gaze was drawn to the huge screen overhead, which displayed the cameraman's work.

Everyone soon began to shout as well.

A volcano-like eruption of tissue and cartilage erupted from within the box. Chunks of it fell over and broke the box apart, exposing the remainder of the partygoers to its molten and repulsive sight. It didn't appear human, but it did resemble one of the minor varieties, and as it crept out of its confinement, it instantly began to move over to Angel, who began to step back.

The adolescent turned to flee before the cluster of flesh and bones alike grabbed and tugged him. Angel shouted, but not as loudly as the other screams that erupted from everyone else in the enormous ballroom. Parents came to the doors, elders rushed to the doors, children wept, and staff fought to open the seemingly unopened doors.

Angel could hear his parents yell at him as they were engulfed by the turmoil, and as he struggled to lift himself up, he could feel fluids soak through his pricey suit, causing the delicate fibers to deteriorate from within. He pounded the thing, pierced where its eyes would be, and yanked at its foul clumps, but it didn't work.

But something caught his attention as he struggled to flee the creature's grip.

Something gleaming explodes from its dissolving skin, a hint of a silver swirl dazzling the lights above. Angel reached out, grabbed, and pulled the object away from the creature, eliciting a strangled whine in the process. Angel examined the necklace in his bloodied palm, his mind attempting to comprehend what it was before coming to a conclusion.

His eyes are drawn to the deformed figure of the monster, and he recognizes the strangling voice from earlier. His heart begins to beat faster, and his vision begins to blur with tears.

“Abel-”

A figure came near Angel, and despite his mind screaming at him not to look, he did. The adolescent held the spiral necklace close to his breast, near his pounding heart, and gazed across at the figure in front of him.

Abel stood in front of Angel and the monster, his smile wide and pleased, as the adolescent began to move his head from side to side.

“No—no—you didn't-”

'Abel' began to chuckle which quickly turned into a cackle, and before anyone knew it, it had turned into full-on hysterical laughing. His hands reached over to his face and began to pull it apart, like a fleshy suit, revealing the perpetrator behind the whole thing.

A man in a three-piece blue suit walked out into the terrified audience, his wings-tipped shoes tapping across the bloodied dance floor as if nothing was wrong. He lifted his hands in the air as everyone else turned their attention to him, leaving the fleshly remains of Abel lying on the ground. His face, twisted as it was, bore a big and proud smile that no one could match!

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls," the well-dressed individual exclaimed, "You are in Laugh Is Fun!!!"

There was silence for a little moment.

Angel stared in fear at the strange man, his breathing becoming uncontrolled as he began to scream, his pleadings for the man to stop going unheard.

Angel could only watch in horror as he heard a distant chuckle.

Then that chuckle turned into a cackle.

Then that cackle turned into a howl.

And then…everyone laughed.

Parents laughed, elders laughed, children laughed, workers laughed, 'Abel' laughed, and even Angel's parents laughed.

They all laughed in strange unison for so long and so hard that their faces grew crimson, their bellies gripped, and their voices gave out from the sheer force of their laughter. Angel could only watch as laughing began to obscure his uncontrollable sobs, his body immobilized under the weight of what remained of his cousin, all he could do was stare at the man above him.

The man—no—monster who just laughed at him.

"Happy birthday, Angel!" It howled, still laughing, as it began to point out the hidden cameras from all across the ballroom.

All the time, it repeated that haunting chant that Angel would never forget, even after all these years.

“Laugh with us!”

“Laugh with us!”

“Laugh with us!”

[consumedbythemossyforest]

A Friendly Bet

“Come on Micah, why not?” Nash prods, waggling his eyebrows, “It’s just one date! You know you want to.” Micah hunches her shoulders, smothering a grimace, and continues to class. It’s just a joke Micah. You can take a joke. Despite her half-hearted self-encouragement, her heart sinks when she sees Wren blocking the door to her classroom.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks.

“To class,” she answers, shouldering her way past the both of them. As she takes her seat, Nash waves at her, and the two boys leave, laughing with their arms slung around the other. She’s not sure how she managed it, but somehow, she had gotten caught up in a bet between her two friends. They had both bet that they could make Micah go on a date before the other could. While she knew that the boys could get competitive, especially when it came to outdoing the other, the lines between playfulness and seriousness were starting to blur. She could no longer tell what exactly their intentions were, and it only made her more anxious about what their reactions would be when she finally figured things out. Micah opens her laptop, types aroace into the search bar, and goes about ignoring whatever her physics teacher is trying to explain.

Thankfully, the next few days pass without incident and Micah starts to let her guard back down. Nash and Wren are spending more and more time together without her, and she is simultaneously relieved and worried about what that might mean. Are they plotting? Have they caught on to what Micah was figuring out about herself? She’s almost certain that she identifies as aroace, but she doesn’t want her friends to scorn her because she ruined their fun, or worse, they think that she’s broken. She’s contemplating all this on her walk home from school, spiraling as her brain races through all the what-ifs.

When she opens her door, she’s immediately pulled from her thoughts at the sight of rose petals littering the floor. It’s surprisingly nice to be back on familiar ground, even when that means she’s the focus of that stupid bet. So, she follows those rose petals to the backyard. Nash is not nearly this thoughtful, this one’s gotta be Wren. And it was. She opens the door to Wren standing there with a bouquet of roses and a teddy bear.

“Micah,” he begins with a flourish, “would you do me the incredible, desperately needed honour, of going out on a date with me?” He places both the teddy and the roses in Micah’s arms as she desperately scrambles for an answer.

“Thanks for the bear. Were you too cheap to go for the chocolates?” she stalls.

“I will have you know that I got these roses for the steep price of stealing them from my neighbour’s rose bush. Don’t diss the roses!” And this is what finally broke Micah. This is how it used to be: just her and Nash and Wren, joking around and having fun. She shouldn’t dread being around them and she misses when they would just hang out. So, she stops after they re-enter her house and Wren turns around, one eyebrow raised, and Micah says,

“I think I need to call a family meeting.”

Wren’s entire demeanour changes from faux-indignant to concerned, and that’s when Micah knows she’s made the right decision. He still cares. “Right now? Do you want me to call Nash?” he asks, clearly worried. Family meetings are only called when something’s really wrong.

“No. Not right now. I need a few days to prepare. How’s Friday?” Wren looks even more worried at that but agrees. No one ever says no to a family meeting.

So, Micah spends the next few days rehearsing what she’s going to say. She prepares answers to every conceivable question and hopes that she’s not making a terrible mistake. When the doorbell rings, she just wants to get it over with, so she ushers the two boys into her living room and just blurts it out, “I’m aroace!” after a few seconds of stunned silence, she starts rambling, “Okay so basically that means that I don’t feel any romantic or sexual attraction. I didn’t know how to bring it up with the whole bet thing going on and–”

“Hey,” Nash cuts her off. She didn’t even realize that he had stood up during her panic-induced ramble until he was right in front of her. “Micah, it’s totally okay. We’re here for you and support you. Come sit down.” He guides her to sit down between the two of them. “We are so sorry if we made you feel uncomfortable with the bet or like you couldn’t trust us with this. You’re our best friend and we always have your back.” At those words, Micah sags back onto the couch, leaning on Wren who wraps his arm around her.

“And since we’re sharing,” Wren says, “Nash and I have some news too.” Micah looks up at him questioningly, and He simply leans over to plant a kiss on Nash’s cheek and suddenly, all that extra time spent without her makes sense.

“Oh,” she says. “Ohhhhhhhhhhhh.” She sits in silence for a second and then asks, “You guys are serious? You’re not just doing this to make me feel better?”

“No Micah. We’re serious.”

“Okay. Okay good.” She thinks for a moment and then adds, “And don’t forget to use protection!” They both groan, and she smiles. And she knows that everything is going to be okay.

[frogtanii]

but... why?

akaashi sighed as he put down his phone, his eyes trailing over the numerous bags and suitcases meiko had brought on the trip.

it wasn’t like he didn’t want to hear bokuto’s answer but... he knew it would be something so sweet and wholesome that another wave of intense guilt would overtake him.

keiji, despite what he seemed to portray, wasn’t an idiot. he knew he was neglecting his closest and oldest friend and he knew it was affecting the both of them. he couldn’t remember the last late night mcdonald’s cheat meal he’d gone on with bokuto or the last time bokuto had pestered him about the book he was currently immersed in.

instead, his days were primarily occupied with meiko and attempting to read books that he was meant to do reviews on for his channel. as of late, it was much more of the former, his lover (??) basically forcing him to spend time with her.

ok, so she wasn’t exactly forcing him but there were times where he wished meiko cared enough to accept that he didn’t always want to watch the bachelor (the lowest form of entertainment in his opinion) and talk shit about certain people in the house. sometimes, he just wanted to lie down in bed with a large mug of hot chocolate, a good poetry book and maybe, just maybe, the woman he loved pressed against his side allowing him to read to her.

once, akaashi had brought up his desires to meiko. she’d laughed (physically laughed!!!) in his face and told him that “if she wanted to listen to a boring man read a boring book, she’d just buy an audiobook of the bible.”

not once did he express his feelings to her again.

he realized the relationship he had with meiko wasn’t the healthiest, especially since he had the room next to iwaizumi’s and heard every single noise she made when he was with him.

keiji’s therapist (a dr kanemoto — he’d been seeing him since he was 11 for his test anxiety ((his parents had always been overly prepared))) had advised against entering this content house in the first place.

apparently, with his introverted tendencies and the resurgence of his anxiety, it wasn’t the smartest of decisions to move into a home with so many high energy, semi-problematic, super famous creators.

but by the time he figured that out, he’d already signed the contract and promised bokuto that he would follow through. it didn’t help that meiko was in his other ear, practically begging him to come.

so akaashi did.

and now here he was; sitting in his girlfriend(?)’s room, surrounded by her things while dreading a conversation with his best friend.

when did everything go so wrong?

a knock sounded at meiko’s door, making keiji jump a little at the sound. he could feel his heart begin to beat erratically, his palms starting to sweat, and his stomach tightening as he made his way to the door.

when did he get anxious at the thought of bokuto????

taking a final deep breath in, akaashi opened the door only to be met immediately with... a hug.

bokuto’s muscular arms wrapped around keiji’s shoulders, the taller man squeezing him tightly — not too tight but enough that akaashi could feel himself melt into his friend’s hold.

keiji hesitantly lifted his arms to reciprocate the hug, a large sigh leaving kotarou’s body.

“missed you,” bokuto whispered, so quiet akaashi almost didn’t catch it. the short phrase was so full with emotion that his eyes welled up with tears, his vision behind his glasses becoming blurry.

“i... i missed you too bokuto-san,” keiji finally responded, his voice thick with regret. the silver haired man didn’t respond, instead choosing to hold him tighter.

they stood there for what felt like hours but in actuality was actually closer to 2 minutes, just basking in one another’s presence for the first time in months.

they probably would’ve stayed that way too if it weren’t for kuroo awkwardly clearing his throat at the door. akaashi quickly removed himself from bokuto, missing the hurt look on his friend’s face entirely as he awkwardly waved hello to the small calvary standing outside meiko’s room.

“sorry to interrupt,” sakusa began, shifting uncomfortably at the entrance. “but we are here to help.” the rest of the group nodded in agreement and with keiji’s subtle nod of approval, they all dispersed into the room, collecting meiko’s stuff and throwing them (quite literally, in kenma’s case) into her bags.

bokuto shot akaashi a small smile before joining atsumu on the far end of the room, who was working on meiko’s hair products. it was nice to see him getting along with others and making friends but it was... bittersweet.

somehow, keiji felt like... he wasn’t a part of bokuto’s life anymore — like he was an outsider just looking in.

“he’s changed, hasn’t he?” a soft voice came from beside him, temporarily startling him until he saw who was speaking to him — you.

you weren’t looking at akaashi, your eyes entirely focused on bokuto who was now enthusiastically conversing with sakusa about various skin care products, waving about meiko’s as an example.

“bokuto is kind and he’s funny and he cares... he cares so much,” you continued, in the same soft, kind voice. “he cares about you—” keiji’s breath hitched in his throat, “and while at the moment i can’t understand why, i trust him.”

finally, you looked up at him, your gaze taking him completely off guard. “don’t hurt him, okay?” and with that, you walked off, moving to join kenma and kuroo, playfully ruffling kenma’s hair as a greeting while gently hip bumping kuroo.

akaashi couldn’t stop the tears from welling up in his eyes again but this time because of pride — pride that his best friend had a people who saw him for who he was and not just some empty headed himbo. instead they, no you, saw bokuto as intelligent, observant and oh so sympathetic.

he watched as bokuto approached you, wrapping his massive arms around your waist and pressing his nose into your hair, laughing softly at your giggles.

if you saw something in kotarou that no one else did, if you treated him with the respect and kindness that he so deserved, then maybe, just maybe, you deserved that kindness too.

and if keiji could try for anyone, he could do it for bokuto.

℗ poker face

try, for him

series masterlist

(●’◡’●)ﾉ

an - THIS CH MADE ME SO SOFT N a lil sad :( but WOOHOO akaashi’s arc!!!!! i rlly wanna know what y’all think abt this one por favor hehe <3

taglist - if your name is in bold, i cannot tag you

@boosyboo9206 • @geektastic84 • @elianetsantana • @trashy-simp • @infinitebells • @6mattsun9 • @suhkusa • @sazunari • @kotarosbabygirl • @fucktheworlddude • @insomniacwreck • @calumsfringe • @saltylettuce • @chai-blu • @al3x1ss • @hawksyoongi • @syndellwins • @jooleuuh • @amberalisa • @kissungjae • @liberhoe • @tetsurocore • @animeoverdosee • @duhsies • @saikishairclip • @afire24 • @premiyagi • @kit-kat428 • @doctorspencereid • @daphnxy • @kyomihann • @maer-333 • @sinoflust19 • @peteunderoos • @peachiikichu • @iidanotlida • @yongboxerrr • @kac-chowsballs • @tanakaslastbraincell • @memorableminds • @risjime • @starry-magicshop • @sugavwara • @smuttyanimeslut • @kiwibirbs-library • @haijkk • @airybnb • @babierin • @iwaisa • @decaffinatedtealover • @notameera • @kawaii-angelanne • @rintarovibes • @urlocalsimp

the rest of the tags will be in the replies!!

[vintage-marina]

Watching him fade away f!reader

Basically I had this really weird mash-up/crossover in my head (yeah I know another one). Only with the mcu and the maze runner lol, sorry guys.

Summary: The Snap takes a lot of people, including the people that Tony Stark loves.

Female reader

I don't know what the ship will be yet.

Inspired by: the book called: Him on fanfiction.net by Eya Silvers. It isn't finished and I think it's discontinued but every character is so much in character!! So please check that story out :))

Wordcount: 1270 words

TW/CW: Swearing, death

"Peter!"

Voice hoarse, you were desperately limping to the spider boy.

What the hell is happening?

What did Thanos do?

Your breath went up and down, the need for oxygen was enormous. But, you couldn't, you couldn't take a deep breath, it was too painful.

You took another step, the dry ground underneath you cracked. The eerie sound of rusting metal made you dread what will come.

Dust particles flew around them.

Not him too.

Your helmet was long gone, anyway what was left of it. Quickly pushing it away when he escaped. It was maybe 30 minutes, when that happend. You took a seat on a piece of rock and bide your time, hoping that whoever fought on Earth was winning.

You accepted it, your finger traced the wound on your leg in anticipation. Maybe then, the pain would stop. Your dad, Tony walked up to you with the help of Peter and swatted your finger away.

You could read his face easily.

Anxious, worried, mad these three emotions were swirling in his head.

"If you dare to touch that wound again, I'm selling all your stuff."

"No you don't." Nothing else could came out of your throat.

The two of you tried to smile eachother but it turned into a grimace. Quickly he gave a peck on the crown of your head, but the wound on his side didn't agreed with it.

"Stop- Dad! You're hurting yourself!"

"Stop talking," he ordered and with a big sigh he continued "I'm too good for this world". He turned his gaze to the wound, to examanize it, to analyse it, to heal it. He wiped away the blound on the corner of his mouth, he had to help you first. Tony had to find a way to heal you, find away to get the task out of his head otherwise he wouldn't know if you would survive it.

He wouldn't know if he would survive it to live without you or Peter. He didn't know if they could ever return to Earth.

Maybe they had to spend their slenting days on this planet.

He tried to think about something else, tried not to look at your wounds, at Peters wounds but that's everything he could see. Everthing was red, spilled with the blood of you two.

No, he couldn't lose you.

He couldn't.

So, he didn't tried to remove the piece of moon that got stuck in your leg, in fear that would cause an unimaginable blood loss.

Your breath was quick to quick for his liking. He blinked his tears away and saw that yours too were watery.

"Does it hurt?" He softly touched the side of your neck, his heart was making loopholes.

You hummed in pain, wiping away the blood on your cheekbone. You could hear Peter talk with a tensed voice.

The pain was overbearing, voices were distorting and you swore there were stars clouding your vision.

"Something's happening," Mantis whispered a warning.

You whipped your head and instead of Mantis, you saw a bile of dust flying away.

Oh my God, you were going crazy.

Then, Drax, Peter Quill and Dr. Strange followed.

Your eyes widened.

Scared were you.

No, terrified.

If you could scream, you would have done that.

Peter wasn't at your side anymore, he walked away. His breath was becoming deeper and deeper over the next couple of seconds and he folded his arms around his ribcase, he looked.. a bit sick.

"Mr. Stark?" He called out, Tony tore his gaze away from you and looked at Peter. With pain in your body, you shot yourself up, panic fueling adrenaline kicking in.

"I don't feel so good," wobbling at his feet he was looking at his hands. A couple of tears fell on the boy's cheeks.

Walking up to his mentor, no his father he stammered something out. He was looking for reasurrance, that it would be alright.

But, it wouldn't.

"You're alright," Tony's lie was a poorly covered up one.

Peter stepped forward, "I don't, I don't know what's happening. I don't-"

He fell in Tony's arms and clamped his arms around him like a scared child, he held Tony fast with a tight grip. He didn't want to slip away, Tony gripped him equally tight.

You took a step forward and then the next.

"Peter!"

Voice hoarse, you were desperately limping to the spider boy.

What the hell is happening?

What did Thanos do?

Your breath went up and down, the need for oxygen was enormous. But, you couldn't, you couldn't take a deep breath, it was too painful.

You took another step, the dry ground underneath you cracked. The eerie sound of rusting metal made you dread what will come.

Dust particles flew around them.

Not him too.

Tears were already flowing on your cheeks, you deeply sobbed while you looked at Peter. His legs were already gone.

He was frightened.

"I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go Mr. Stark please. Please, I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go," he pleaded.

It was quiet to quiet, for your liking. Only the buzz in your ears, the pleading from Peter and the soft sniffling from Tony was all that you could hear.

Tony softly laid him on the ground, you practically ran towards him. You didn't care that a piece of rock tore up your leg, you just wanted to go to him, to Peter.

On your knees you pushed away the curls from his forehead, he stared at nothingness for a second. He locked eyes with yours, turned his gaze away and looked at Tony.

He wanted something to say to the two of you, His arm, that was around Tony's shoulder dusted away.

"I'm sorry."

Turning his head, he looked at nothing again.

Slowly turning to dust.

You touched the place where he laid, but all you felt was dust.

"Peter!" you whailed.

Your dad engulfed you in a hug, trying to calm your grief, trying to calm his grief.

He lost Peter, he couldn't lose you.

A cry tore your vocal cords, laced with anguish and grief.

"No, not him. Not him, not him," you stammered out over and over again.

Tony rocked the two of you, patting the backside of your head.

You felt droplets in your hair, the both of you trying to calm down the other. You hugged your father, finding an anchor to hold on to.

He is still alive.

That's a positive sign right?

Pain is good, pain is life.

Sobbing again, you hugged him even tighter.

"What the fuck happend?"

"I don't know, I don't know."

Laying down your cheek on Tony's shoulder, you stared at the rusty fundments, should that have been buildings what Thanos talked about?

You wiggled your fingers, they felt strange. Then a hit of numbness and tingling shot up in your hands, mouth dropping to a frown you spoke alarmed.

"Dad-dad."

He pushed you softly away and looked you in the eye, you looked everywhere than his.

"My fingers-my hands. My hands are numb," your voice was higher than ever, panic laced in your voice. "My hands are numb."

Your hands were vanishing.

You freezed up, you could only watch your arms slowly disintegrating.

I'm going to die, I'm going to die.

I don't want to.

"I'm scared, dad. I'm scared, I don't want to-"

Tony hugged you again, a peck placing on your forehead.

Tears streamed down your cheeks.

"It's okay, sweetheart, just let go-"

"I'm scared."

You sniffled and a watery cough escaped your throat.

You turned your gaze away from Nebula, who stood a couple of meters away, then your eyes became glassy.

Turned to dust.

Tony doubled forward, catching the leftover dust that was supposed to be you.

When a child loses their parents, people will call them an orphan.

But what do they call parents who lost their child?

What do they call Tony now?

Disorientated he sat again, looking at his hands.

Empty.

That's what he felt.

"He did it," Nebula whispered, perhaps to no one.

Hunching foreward, he slowly shook his head and folded his hands around his chin.

What just happened?

Comments are appreciated! And who should I pair the reader up with, I thought maybe Thomas comment who your thoughts are :)

[just-a-new-gi-writer]

Creator Reforged: Building God Chapter 3b

A/N: And here’s the other half of the twin chapters! Thank you for your patience, everyone!

Word count: 3077

Warnings: Diluc goes sicko mode (minor character death, brief gore mentions), mentions of a dismembered body

Masterpost

First Prev To 3a Next

Another fruitless search in Dadaupa Gorge. Diluc frowned at the road ahead of him as he rode back to the winery. He had been more… anxious as of late, but he couldn’t pin down exactly why.

These past few days, he had slowly grown more and more uneasy in his searches of southern Mondstadt. He had found himself painstakingly searching anything he came across for the finest of details. More than once, he had to catch himself from straying from the area he was searching. Why did he always seem to be meandering west?

It took Diluc longer than he liked to notice someone trying to catch his attention on the side of the path. When he registered it as his brother, he almost wished to remain oblivious. That damn smirk on Kaeya’s face only deepened his dread as he approached.

“What is it.” Diluc’s tone was barely that of a question as he brought the horse to a halt.

“Goodness, Diluc,” That grin was insufferable, “is that really how you greet your brother? I realize the times haven’t been easy on us as of late–”

“If all you’re interested in is idle chatter–”

“Oh, enough.” Kaeya tilted his head. “You’ve known me how long, and can’t tolerate a simple conversation?”

“What is it, Kaeya?”

“Hmph. You’re almost as bad as those agents down the way.” Kaeya leaned back against a nearby tree. “Awfully unfriendly. Almost serves them right for the trouble they got themselves into.”

“‘Agents’?” Diluc paused. “Wouldn’t be from the adventurer’s guild, then.”

“You should know,” Kaeya shrugged, “you’d be far more familiar with them.”

Diluc’s eyes darkened. “Fatui. I thought they were busy with their own internal issues.”

“If they aren’t, they will be soon. I saw a couple fall in battle, and their injuries weren’t… shallow.”

Diluc mulled the situation over. “Who were they fighting?”

“Our recent arrivals.”

“The Rifthounds.” Diluc paused. “At least the monsters are fighting each other. But what are the hounds doing so far south?”

“For their part, the Fatui have taken down a few of the wolves.”

“…Wait, this isn’t making sense. Why are the Fatui fighting Rifthounds so far away from… anything? What would they have to gain? They should disengage and retreat before losses mount… Unless–”

“Unless the Fatui have a vested interest in ‘finding’ something quickly. Those wolves just make things even more interesting. It could be chalked up to a coincidence, but I’ve given up on those ever since the Traveler passed through.”

“What could the Fatui be searching for, though, especially in these times?”

“No clue. What have you been searching for?”

Diluc remained quiet for a second, pursuing his thoughts. “Where did you last see the battle?”

“Let me ride along and I’ll show you.”

DIluc hesitated, but quickly relented. “Fine.” He held out a hand to help Kaeya up.

“And would you consider letting me spend the night at the Winery?”

“…Perhaps–”

“And a bottle from your stache?”

“Don’t push your luck.”

“Turning into me, now?”

“You’re welcome to walk, Kaeya.”

The ride was short with Kaeya’s directions, but neither rider felt the time pass quickly. Kaeya pointed out where to turn off the main road onto a smaller one, as the blackened midday sky stared down at them. He warned Diluc about the different turns and pitfalls, his voice sounding unnaturally from the deafening silence about them. Even when finding a place to hitch his horse, he couldn’t help but feel like the trees themselves were all but bending down to him, begging him to stay nearby, if only to assuage their fears.

Kaeya began to lead the way, picking through the undergrowth into the forest beyond. For a while, the only sound was them picking their way through the foliage. The quiet was getting to Diluc. How long ago had Kaeya picked up on the sounds of battle? How long could the fight have gone on?

“Kaeya.” He knew he should stay quiet, but he couldn’t bear the building apprehension. But why was he feeling it in the first place?

“I know.” There was some undertone to his voice that Diluc wasn’t used to hearing from him. Trepidation? “Hopefully the victors haven’t made off with their spoils too long ago.”

“They don’t travel in small numbers when they want to ensure victory. Hard to avoid leaving some kind of trail.”

“So you say.”

“Mostly because–”

Kayea held up a hand and Diluc quickly fell silent. He strained his ears, searching for what his brother had caught. On the edge of his hearing, Diluc could hear bits and pieces of scattered conversation.

“…wh… gn… d?” Most of the sounds were lost to the surroundings.

“…hl…ls…sps…td?” Pointed anger rang in the stranger’s voice. “Clst…bv…Tsrst…hp…s”

“…can’t just stay hr… …mr of those things find us?”

Kaeya glanced back at Diluc. Two standing, he mouthed, many dead? Rifthounds defeated. Cryo gunner, electro hammer.

Diluc materialized his claymore behind himself. Surprise attack possible?

Kaeya shook his head. Too far away.

Distract electro, Diluc stepped up as he readied his weapon, I’ll deal with cryo, return to help you. Ready?

Kaeya rolled his eye as he summoned his weapon. And you call me the aggressive one. He paused, taking one last second to prepare himself, and then pushed the last bit of foliage aside, leaving some room. Diluc sprung into action, identifying and closing in on the obese gunner while steering clear of the hammerer.

“–Company!” the gunner sputtered behind his mask. With practiced hands, he snapped one, then two cartridges off his belt and into his weapon.

“Crimson Hawk!” the hammerer shouted, grabbing his weapon and hefting it, “Don’t let the bastard get close!” One quick motion, and the hammer squealed with electro power, a few small arcs glancing off his armor. “Why now, of all times–”

“Cool it, lapdog,” Kaeya snapped. Diluc felt a few stray flecks of ice spray past him. “We’re here to crash the party, not to be insulted.”

The silver edge of the Favonius Greatsword began to tinge with flames as he neared the gunner. The inexperience betrayed the Fatui agent as he fumbled with his gun, eventually snapping it shut and engulfing himself in a freezing cloud barely before Diluc’s blade could slip past it. The air rang with the shield’s shrieks against the flames but it still remained standing.

Diluc had personal experience with how much punishment these shields could take before breaking- something this new recruit seemed quite unfamiliar with. With measured and precise strikes, Diluc hammered on the weakening shimmering surface- once, twice, and empowered with Pyro, the third strike shattered and dispersed that last vestige of security the gunner held onto.

Shaken by every blow, the agent scrambled to get a grip on his gun as Diluc changed his grip and sized up how quickest to finish him off. The armor around the vitals would make for a sloppy kill with his claymore, and the bulk would draw out assaults around there. An insight crossed Diluc’s mind.

Diluc swiped quickly, knocking an arm away from the gun. Carrying the momentum, he spun around and buried the claymore as deep as it could go, carving into the gunner’s arm, breaking the bone, and lodging the blade partially into his bulk. Now loosened from its grip, he snapped the barrel of the gun up, catching the muzzle on the underside of his opponent’s mask.

Diluc pulled the trigger, and within a second, the gunner slumped to the ground.

He reached down and wrenched his bloodstained claymore out of the gash it sat in, then turned around to clean up Kaeya’s enemy. To his disappointment, the hammerer still stood, trading cautious blows with the captain.

“Heinrich?” the Fatui agent called back, “Hang in there, I’m almost–”

“Don’t talk during battle.” A sudden shock of ice from Kaeya, and the hammerer’s shield dissipated.  “You’re wasting breath when you should be paying–”

Diluc moved forward, the gap between him and the last Fatui agent evaporating. His claymore wreathed in flame, he lunged at the last moment and swung it down with all his might.

In a moment of tearing flesh and pulverized bones, the hammerer crashed lifelessly to the ground.

The battlefield fell quiet, its only noises being the adopted brothers’ heavy breaths and the death rattles of the Fatui Agents. Diluc let go of his sword, letting it reappear behind him.

“They still haven’t learned, it seems. Still using ‘Crimson Hawk’?”

“I’m sorry,” Kaeya blinked in disbelief, “that’s the first thing you say after murdering two people?”

“If I didn’t take care of them now, I would have taken care of them later.” Diluc readjusted his gloves. “Shall we see what these creatures risked everything for?”

“…All this time I’ve known you, and you still surprise me. It seems even you aren’t immune to the wildering impulses lately.” Kaeya clicked his tongue. “Wonder how long it will be before you’re making human sacrifices in the name of the Creator like the rest of them.”

“I’d at least let you do the honors of putting me out of my misery before then.”

“Flattering as always.”

Diluc surveyed the battlefield. Various Fatui corpses were strewn about, each covered by a white sheet, each stained with blood to varying degrees, marking how its charge died. Between them lay the remnants of the Rifthounds, irregular, unnatural stone dyed cyan and shattered to near unrecognition.

But sitting, almost untouched in the middle of it all, was something else entirely. Something not large enough to be a whole body, carefully and meticulously swaddled in white cloth. As he neared, Diluc slowly concluded what it had to be.

Kaeya approached alongside Diluc and knelt down next to the bundle, briefly unwrapping it to confirm Diluc’s suspicions. The hips and legs of some unfortunate soul, separated from the rest of their body. “You know what I’ve said about coincidences.”

“Still warm?”

“Unfortunately so, yes.”

“‘Unfortunately’?”

Kaeya looked up at Diluc. “It means we’ll get tangled up in something worse. Bad things come in threes, after all.”

“Then at least we’ll see some conclusion to this mess.”

“Hopefully one that won’t involve us reuniting with Crepus.”

Diluc glared down at his adopted brother.

“Am I not getting that bottle of wine?”

Diluc at least found the kindness to drop Kayea off at the main road before turning to ride to the trailhead of Dragonspine. The night would be long and the ride hard, but this was not a task to be deferred for tomorrow. He could brave the climb and hopefully rest the night with Albedo. He hadn’t had much interaction with the alchemist, but with any luck, a surprise visitor wouldn’t be turned away.

Travel in these times never ceased to unnerve Diluc. Of all the threats to plague travel in better times, between the Treasure Hoarder ambushes, Fatui attacks, and Hilichurl raids, few managed to seriously unnerve him to the degree that these handful of trips have. Especially now, as the thin sliver of sky turned blue to yellow to red, a mockery of a sunset as the pale disc of a sun dipped low and the stars refused to appear, Diluc found himself slowly growing more and more guarded. It almost would have been a relief if something were to try and strike out at him, but the fact that the roads were so unused…

The tension kept building within him, even as the ride ended and with the horse hitched, even as he followed the meandering path up the mountain’s side. The furious passes lying silent, the biting winds stilled.

Just the sound of crunching snow, the nipping of the cold, the slow heat of the bundle in his arms. Diluc had never felt so utterly alone.

It was a small relief to see the lights of Albedo’s station, brilliant against the snow. Few others would be so mad as to call this mountain home, but in the Knights’ eyes, it was worth it to grant the alchemist’s request. He crossed the last few meters just like the countless before: slow, measured, unceasing.

As he reached the door, he shifted the bundle in his hands to pound on the door three times. He heard the sound of someone inside scrambling to their feet and rushing to open the door.

The door flung open and Diluc looked over the haggard man standing in the doorway. While he had seen Albedo before and was generally sure of his appearance, several things seemed off about him. His clothes were disheveled and messy, marred with old stains. His hair was a mess- what Diluc remembered to be a tight braid of hair wrapping around his head now hung loose and with several locks pulled out of order.

“Di– uh,” Albedo had to pause, searching for a name, “Diluc. To what– Are you–”

“Albedo. Kaeya and I have found another oddity for you.”

“Another– I-Is it really…?” Albedo blinked. “Oh, please! Come inside.” He stepped back and motioned Diluc to follow.

He wasn’t entirely sure what to expect out of the alchemist, but this entire place was in a miserable state. Books and paper littered in every corner. Dried spills long past any hope of being cleaned without serious work. Several scraps of fabric each sewn to a pair in the same pattern- with obvious drive but no obvious purpose. What Diluc assumed to be experiments, neglected and left to gather dust. But it was only in one of the side rooms Albedo led him to, was there something that deeply unsettled Diluc. He recognized it as the torso he found in Rominten, though that in and of itself was nowhere near surprising.

It was how it was displayed. It was laid out on Albedo’s bed with the seeming utmost care. It was almost darkly humorous, seeing it almost propped up against the pillow and the sheets pulled up and smoothed out. Diluc half expected to see a glass of water on the stand nearby.

“Albedo,” Diluc didn’t bother hiding his worried tone, “what is going on.”

The alchemist snapped his head back to look at Diluc, almost like he had been caught in some untrustworthy act. “What?” he innocently asked, “Isn’t it only proper to give Them Their respect?” He didn’t like how some of those words were intoned.

Diluc swallowed. Angel’s Share was always ablaze with rumors, and lately people had little more to talk about when drowning their sorrows than how people they had known to be entirely within their right mind slowly and perceptively over the days lose their sanity, speaking of lamentations on the winds, of messages hidden in the wisps of sky on the horizon, of feeling the very earth gently shudder as it sobbed.

These stories inevitably ended poorly, the people becoming lost in their delusions, sometimes trying to drag their family or friends along into their fantasies, sometimes striking out to find others who followed similar enough mirages.

DIluc didn’t completely discredit those stories- they did explain why Mondstadt City felt more empty as of late- but he never thought that he would stand face-to-face with one of those very people.

What was he to do? Jean had praised Albedo for his clearheadedness and insight, of steadfastly clinging to reason and truth. What could have tipped him over into bordering madness? Was it Albedo’s isolation? The torso that Kaeya had dropped off? Something else entirely? …Would it be right of him to leave Albedo alone with this new addition? Would he be making this entire situation worse?

“Diluc.” Albedo’s stern tone snapped Diluc out of his thoughts.

“Ah–” Returning to the moment, it dawned on DIluc that he wouldn’t have the time to deliberate. Albedo had the covers pulled back, exposing where he was expected to set the legs down.

“Leaving it to me, then?” Albedo stepped forward and reached for the bundle in his hands. “Perhaps it’s only right. You’ve been blessed by Their touch long enough.”

DIluc felt his uncertainty stretch on as Albedo’s hands slipped under his own. “By… what? Albedo, what are you talking about?”

“The Creator’s, obviously.” Albedo pulled the legs off of Diluc’s arms with the utmost care. “You and Kaeya each had plenty of time during the climb. Then again, I suppose I’ve had all the time I wish for here.”

“The Crea–?!” DIluc blinked in disbelief. “Albedo, you cannot seriously believe–”

“Diluc.” Albedo’s tone turned harsh. “I will not permit this blasphemy against Them. Perhaps you cannot yet see Their likeness, but ignorance does not excuse disbelief.”

“Albedo, are you listening to yourself?”

“–Yes, why?”

“Claiming that the Creator, of all things, has descended to Teyvat? From what? A couple pieces of a dismembered body?”

Albedo jerked back, just as he was about to set the legs down. “I’ll have you know that I have plenty of evidence to back my position. The only hurdle is explaining it all to you. But what would some backwater bartender want to know about this? But no,” he gently laid the legs down, nearly touching the body, “you’ll find your evidence in due time, I have no doubts about that. Maybe by you, maybe by your brother.”

“Albedo–”

“Just wait, and you will have your questions answered.” Albedo reached over and grabbed a needle and a spool of medical thread. “Perhaps it would be for the best for you to go back to your search. The sooner you find the final parts…”

“At this time of night? Maybe you have lost your mind.”

“It’s nighttime?” Albedo’s tone snapped back to normal as he glanced at the window. “Already?”

Diluc paused. “…Albedo, how long have you been awake?”

“Not that long, not that long. I’ve just been practicing my stitches for the past five days, ever since Kaeya stopped by to drop off the torso.”

“…Albedo, that was a week and a half ago.”

There was a pause as the wheels turned in Albedo’s head.

“Perhaps your craft could wait until the morning?”

Albedo looked down at the tools in his hands, then turned back to the body. “Those parts aren’t going to miraculously show up at my doorstep.” With shaking hands, he began to thread the needle. “You are familiar with seeing yourself out, I presume?”

Diluc turned and left. Things were worse than he thought. The ride to Mondstadt City would not be easy, but he needed to inform Jean about his concerns.

---

To 3a Next

[earlgreydream]

tame.

| zemo x reader | smut |

anon requested. bratamer!Zemo or something with Zemo and spanking

cw: spanking, whipping, degradation, gagging

“Turn it down, draga!” Zemo snapped, throwing his office door open to reprimand you.

You were stretched out on the couch, starburst candy in your mouth as you kicked your feet to the beat of loud bubblegum pop music.

You’d already been told twice to turn it down, and Zemo was at his wits end with your obnoxious behavior. He was in meetings, the underlying bass of the songs interrupting his important business.

“I did turn it down.” You rolled your eyes, practically sneering at Zemo.

“You keep up this attitude, and you’re on your way to my wrath,” he warned.

“Whatever,” you turned onto your back, draping your head off of the side of the couch.

He stared at you, trying to let his fury simmer down. He finally pulled the plug on your stereo, plunging the room into silence.

Zemo ignored your glare, unable to put up with your bratty behavior any longer. He returned to his office, apologizing to his client. They finished the meeting, and Zemo had his secretary cancel the rest of his schedule.

.

Meanwhile, you were tanning on the deck, completely bare. His clients got an eyeful as they passed your nude body on their way out, making Zemo seethe.

Before you could say something coy, Zemo’s hand wrapped around your bicep, dragging you inside.

“Helmut-”

“I don’t want to hear it. You’ve disrespected me, and yourself, and I’ve had enough!” Zemo snapped.

You dug your heels in, putting up a fight against his manhandling. You were in a mood, and you wanted to rile the stoic sokovian. Household staff avoided looking at your body as they passed, each person who got a glimpse of you— of what was his— only angered Zemo further.

“You think you’re earning yourself a good fuck, yes? That’s what you want?” Zemo snapped, practically throwing your body up against the wall, getting in your face.

You glared at him, caught in the truth. That was exactly what you wanted— Zemo to fuck you thoroughly. He made a noise of disdain, as if your very existence disgusted him.

“You selfish little brat.”

The blood in your veins turned to ice, and you started to panic, realizing you hadn’t earned the reaction you’d hoped for. His dark gaze frightened you, and you dreaded everything that was beginning to unfold.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” you tried to backtrack, tears welling in your eyes.

“You will be sorry,” Zemo hissed, his chest heaving with labored breaths.

He offered no sympathy at the sight of your tears, knowing it was a ploy to get him to lighten your punishment. He wasn’t falling for it, not after how you’d repeatedly pushed his buttons and been disobedient.

“Don’t cry. I haven’t even hurt you yet,” he held your jaw in his hand.

A pathetic whimper escaped your lips, and he dragged you down a side hall in his extensive mansion, to a room you detested. Both of your wrists stayed trapped in one of his hands, while the other pulled a key from the top of the doorframe.

“No, I don’t want to go in the playroom,” you shook your head, struggling against his grip on your wrists.

He said your name in an eerily calm tone, dark eyes boring into you.

“Stop struggling.”

A strained whine caught in your throat, and he pushed you into the room ahead of him. The lock clicked behind you on the door, and your arms went around your naked body. The black marble floor was cold under your feet, contradicting the shame and dread that burned through your skin. Your eyes danced along dark walls, covered in instruments and toys hanging from hooks, to a large bed in the corner.

His hand pressed against your lower back, leading you to the middle of the room, under a honeycomb structure attached to the ceiling. He threaded red cords through it, barely looking at you as he did so.

“Give me your hand.”

You miserably placed your hand in his. Red cord was bound around both of your wrists, tied to the ceiling with just enough pressure to leave your muscles straining, and your feet unsteady.

“Zemo-”

“I don’t want to hear a word out of your slutty mouth unless it’s red.”

You pulled your lower lip between your teeth, falling silent. He walked over to a chest of drawers, pulling out tiny clamps from one of them. You squirmed even before he approached you, the chords rattling against the grate.

You couldn’t escape him, you could barely move even a few centimeters. Your lips were parted, shallow, anxious breaths being exhaled softly. Zemo carefully monitored your reactions, listening to the pained squeak that came as he closed the clamps around your nipples, the sharp pinch biting into your hypersensitive skin. A chain hung between them, and he tugged lightly on it, just to see your toes curl in pain.

You gave Zemo a wounded look, struggling to stay quiet. You knew the rules, making noise and protesting would only land you in deeper trouble. Zemo was angry, and it was not the time to test him. He traced his fingers up your side, smoothing over the curve of your body.

He broke away from you, walking over the wall where different paddles were hanging from hooks. You squirmed in dread as he took a woden one off of the wall, tiny holes in it because he knew it was the one you found the most painful. He reserved it for when you were particularly bratty, or just downright disobedient.

“Stand still,” Zemo broke you out of your spiral of pity.

You exhaled, letting your feet settle on the ground. You didn’t need to be told to count, a quiet “one” falling from your lips as he struck your ass with the wood. Your numbers got progressively more strained until you were sobbing them out, trying not to lose count as your ass burned completely raw. 

Your arms ached, held above your head as you struggled not to teeter, your feet unsteady on the cold floor. Zemo had ceased spanking you, letting you hang there. A cracked whine slipped out when he roughly pulled the nipple clamps off of you, sending a split second of blinding pain through your chest. 

“You don’t have to count these,” Zemo’s voice broke the silence, making you open your eyes. 

You shook your head, another round of tears slipping down your cheeks as he pulled a brown leather whip down. He waited for your safeword, but you didn’t speak, crying silently and turning your face into your arm. 

The leather cord cracked against your already painful skin, welts raising and making you scream into the gag Zemo had placed in your mouth. You bit down on the fabric, sobbing as he whipped you for what felt like hours, though in reality it was likely only a few minutes.

He said your name, calling out to you, but you hardly heard him over your heart pounding in your ears. Zemo pried the gag out of your mouth, tilting your head up with both hands. You blinked slowly, gasping as he released your wrists from the restraints. You collapsed, but he caught you easily, ready for it.

You were shaking in his arms as he carried you to your bedroom, gently laying you down on the bed, easing you to rest on your stomach. He kissed down your spine, laying his hand on your side. You turned your face into the pillow, ashamed of your behavior, and him seeing you so vulnerable. 

“Draga, it’s alright,” his voice soothed your insecurities, and you relaxed as he tenderly massaged cream into your burning skin. 

You sniffed softly, wincing as he gently pulled some silk shorts up over your bum. He buttoned the matching top around you, earning your thanks. You twisted to look at him, pulling him to lay down in front of you, still fully dressed in his suit.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, and he pulled you into his chest, letting you snuggle against him.

“I know, my love. It’s perfectly okay. All is forgiven,” he promised, kissing your head. 

You wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him tightly for as long as he let you. He kissed the protests off of your lips when he stood up, promising he was just changing and then coming back. 

You laid in the white sheets, waiting for your lover to return. He slid into bed next to you, watching the way your eyes lit up at his arrival. He pressed a kiss against your mouth, smiling as you curled up to rest under his arm. 

“My darling.”

.

“Zemo?” you called, walking with a slight limp into the kitchen. 

“I’m here. You didn’t need to be up so early,” he said, looking out the window before kissing your cheek. 

“I wanted to see you,” you answered, happy you’d caught him before a day of meetings.

“See me? Why wouldn’t you?”

“Work...” you answered, looking up at him as if he’d forgotten. 

“I’m off today. What would you like to do?” he asked, turning around and placing a plate of pancakes in your hands. 

You gazed up at him, his smile reaching his dark eyes. He’d felt guilty with how much time he’d spent working. He knew that was the real reason for you acting out, and all he wanted was to make up for it and spend some extra time with you. 

“Would it be wasteful to watch films? And eat these?” You asked.

“That would be perfect,” he helped you onto the couch, making sure you were able to sit comfortably. 

You giggled as he forked a piece of pancake into your mouth, kissing the syrup off of your lips. You ate and watched the movie, gasping at the scary parts and laughing as Zemo covered your eyes. 

“I love you, you know?”

[apollostears]

BEEN LIKE THIS [ h. iwaizumi ] II

↬︎ anime: haikyuu

↬︎ pairing(s): iwaizumi hajime x fem!black!reader & kyōtani kentarō x fem!black!reader

↬︎ warning(s): swearing, mentions of violence, slight ooc!iwaizumi

↬︎ wc: 2.5k

↬︎ PLOT. after breaking up with your longtime boyfriend, iwaizumi, you’re now finding comfort in old friends.

part one

one year timeskip

"please, this kid is going to lose his fucking mind over this." kyōtani cursed excitedly, wrapping up the baby gift in cool alien wrapping.

you had walked past, holding a bag of gifts you had gotten your godson for his first birthday tomorrow. between you, oikawa, and his friends that baby was spoiled. emma hated it, but only because you guys always beat her to the best surprises.

"it still pisses me off how good you are at gift wrapping." you murmured, setting the bag by the front door and then talking a seat next to your boyfriend on the couch.

after breaking up with iwaizumi and having to start over, you ended up forming an uncanny relationship with kyōtani. the two of you had always been close since high school and had slowly drifted due to your commitment with iwaizumi and his with pro-volleyball. he was one of the first people to comfort you, despite the previous respect he had held for his old teammate.

you hadn't wanted to fall in love again, especially so soon. and you honestly thought you never would until you and kyōtani hung out more and it became easy. easy to fall in love with someone who loved you long before you realized it yourself. at that point, it was six months post-breakup and you hadn't heard from iwaizumi ever since that day.

while you were the godmother to oikawa and emma's son, iwaizumi was the godfather. you knew that you'd have to face him tomorrow for the first time in over a year, but you couldn't find yourself to care. not when he had easily moved onto his coworker less than two months after y'all ended things. besides, tomorrow was about your godson and nobody would distract you from that.

"princess, you're staring again." kyōtani mumbled, redness coating the apple's of his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

"sorry my love. make sure write it's from you AND me. i refuse to have a repeat of the last time we got him something and you flipped it to make it look like it was only you." you lightly scolded, grabbing the remote to put something on.

kyōtani grumbled under his breath before reaching over to press a quick kiss to your lips and place the last gift on the table. with the sendai frogs on a by-week, you and kyōtani were spending some much needed couple time together.

"you nervous about seeing him?" kyōtani asked after a moment of silence as the tv show played in the background.

settled under his arm, you couldn't see his face but you could tell that he wasn't looking at you. "nervous? no. anxious? maybe. i just don't want him to do anything to jeopardize bubba's day." you admitted, dreading what would happen if iwaizumi dared to make a scene at your godson's first birthday party.

kyōtani gave you a reassuring squeeze in response, dropping the issue after that. it went without saying that kyōtani would quite literally do anything to maintain your happiness. even if it meant fighting someone whom he used to be friends with.

the oikawa house was completely decked out in alien decor. the whole thing looked like it cost a grip but it was a nice feeling to know that tooru was still the bougiest motherfucker you knew. walking up the steps to the house, kyōtani held the bag of gifts in one hand and held your hand in the other. using your free hand, you used the secret 'alien' knock emma created, to get it.

they were both dorks honestly.

the two of you waited a moment before the door opened to reveal hanamaki dressed like an alien. big head and all. kyōtani busted out laughing at his old teammate while you tried your best to hide your amusement.

"how much are they paying you?" you asked, tears welling up in your eyes from how ridiculous he looked.

"not enough." he deadpanned, taking the bag of gifts from kyōtani to put with the others. "close the door please." he called out, walking away from you two.

"this is the funniest thing i've ever seen oikawa do."

you finally let out your own laughs as you caught a glimpse of hanamaki hitting his head on the chandelier from it being too big. "i have to pee!" you wheezed out, hunched over in complete tears at the situation.

"c-come on babe. we gotta go—we gotta go see the kid." kyōtani stuttered, unable to contain his own laughter.

"y'all make me sick." hanamaki muttered, walking past the two of you to go take a seat on the couch.

after a minute, you both regained your composure and made your way to the back where everyone was at. so caught up in the sight that was hanamaki, you had forgotten all about your ex and happily went out to the backyard.

it didn't take long to spot your godson as he had spotted you before you were able to land eyes on him. you heard your name being yelled and then saw a cute toddler force his way out of his godfather's arms.

letting go of kyōtani’s hand, you crouched down with open arms to scoop the little boy up and pull him close to you. “there’s the birthday boy!!! how are you my little angel??”

he flashed you a toothy grin before rubbing noses with you to signal his happiness. it was odd, but when he was only a few months, he started doing that with you every time he was happy and it just stuck.

“uncle mad dog!” he screeched, flinging his arms out for kyōtani to hug him.

oikawa’s to blame for the nickname still being in play, but honestly, kyōtani didn’t mind. he’d do anything for the little spawn of satan. to him, baby oikawa was an angel born from an angelic mother and a demon father. it’s a funny joke the two of them have.

“y/n! mad dog-chan! glad you guys could make it!”

speaking of the devil. . .

oikawa and emma both walked over to you guys dressed up in star trek attire. your godson wiggled himself out of kyōtani’s arms and ran off to his friends that were playing in the bouncy house.

meeting the married couple halfway, you shared your greetings and followed them where the other adults were sitting. just about everyone was there, sitting and talking with daichi and ushijima on the grill, probably to prevent the others from eating all the meat.

iwaizumi sat next to akaashi with a pregnant woman on his lap and a ring on her finger. it was the same woman you remember meeting when she joined the black jackals team as an assistant athletic trainer to iwaizumi. honestly, you weren’t surprised that that was who he ended up with. you were just surprised at how fast they were moving. you’re with someone for four plus years and never got proposed to. let alone pregnant.

“did little oikawa call you mad dog, kyōtani?” kuroo snickered, a knowing smirk on his face.

you playfully rolled your eyes at his behavior before taking a seat next to emma on the shared hammock. “you still lookin like a rooster?” your man fired back, grabbing a drink from the cooler before sitting in between kindaichi and tendou.

the rest of you laughed at kuroo’s pouty face, enjoying the familiarity of it all.

“y/n, did you get the gift i sent you for your promotion?” hinata asked excitedly, lean legs having grown a bit with his hair still as orange as ever. he had an arm around yachi’s shoulders and it made you smile that the two finally got together.

“yes, i did thank you sho! it was very sweet of you.”

hinata smiled brightly at you in thanks. he was always sending gifts to his friends for every little achievement. it was sweet.

“i saw the huge bag of gifts you and ken brought in. please don’t tell me you spoiled the mess out of my baby.” emma pouted, giving you and kyōtani a look.

you put your hands up in shock. “in our defense. . . i told y/n not to go over board.” kyōtani spoke, throwing you under the bus.

“oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me! all we did was buy him a toy or two. . .or ten. plus the newest motorized car that just came out.” you answered sheepishly, realizing that you may have went over board.

emma gasped and lightly hit you in the arm. “now when he throws tantrums because he can’t get his way, i’m blaming you.”

you just laughed knowing that there was no way your sweet angel baby could ever throw a tantrum. “you got him that too? oh, what a coincidence!”

it was unintentional, but the hairs on your skin stood up as you heard her voice. she was looking at you with a smile, almost in a nice-nasty kind of way and it made your skin crawl.

“hmm, that’s unfortunate. no worries, that’s what receipts are for!” you answered back, trying your best to come off as polite.

the two of you had never formally met. you just saw her in passing when the boys were talking about her one practice. iwaizumi had never mentioned her to your prior to your breakup and you never brought it up to him.

“we’ve never met, have we? i’m maki, hajime’s fiancé.”

you could feel the energy shift as all eyes were on the two of you. emma held your hand and squeezed it as a warning. she knew what kind of woman maki was and knew she’d be able to get under your skin.

“good for you.” you gave a tight lipped smile before turning your attention to lev who was sitting in the chair next to you. “i saw you in the vogue magazine for germany with your sister. you guys looked amazing!”

lev had opened his mouth to speak, surprised that you had directed your attention to him instead of the woman across from you two, but was cut off by maki.

“hajime and i won’t be returning our gift by the way. we brought it here first after all. just wouldn’t be fair.” she interjected rudely.

feeling yourself grow irritated, you took a deep breath and exhaled, turning to face her now that she’s interrupted your conversation with lev. “that’s fine. i’m sure he’ll love the gift.”

you could see her face drop at the response you gave, seeing that it wasn’t the one she wanted. this woman could try all she wanted, she wasn’t going to win. no matter how much iwaizumi’s very presence makes your soul itch, you weren’t going to come out of character for her.

“didn’t you used to date haji? thank you, by the way, for giving him to me.”

now that comment made you heat up. you were tired of her already trying shit, and at a children’s party no less. there were few things you played about and your godson was one of them. you were not about to let her ruin this.

“iwaizumi, you better get your girl.” kyōtani warned, already growing agitated at her childish behavior.

your ex scoffed, now choosing to speak up. “nobody’s scared of you or her. besides, all my fiancé has done was tell the truth.”

“that’s enough hajime. cut it out man.” oikawa advised, but it was too late. the damage had been done and now you were mad.

leaning forward in the hammock, you clasped your hands together and narrowed your eyes at the vile couple before you before speaking.

“let’s get something clear; i am not the one nor the two. this is my godson’s first birthday party and i refuse to let you two bitches, fuck this up. rest assured, that if you say anything else sideways out yo mouth, i will drag you pregnant and all. your fiancé is a bitch and ain’t shit and won’t ever be shit. matter of fact, tell me; did he propose to you before or after he knocked you up?”

“oh shit.” atsumu uttered out loud as the rest of them listened to you clear her and iwaizumi with a quickness.

maki and iwaizumi looked at you in anger. “say something else to her and i will, quite literally, fuck you up.” kyōtani threatened, coming to stand behind you.

your heart was racing with adrenaline, ready to see what would happen next from the two. “that’s enough. y/n’s right, this is for my son and the fact that you are trying to start unnecessary problems, is very inappropriate. i’m going to have ask for you to leave." emma ordered.

“are you kidding me? oikawa, you can’t just kick me out of my own godson’s party.” iwaizumi protested, baffled that he was actually being asked to leave.

oikawa shook his head in disappointment. “i’m sorry, but your behavior towards y/n has been unacceptable. what my wife says, goes. we don’t need the unnecessary drama and i also don’t want to see witness maki being dog walked up and down my backyard.”

it was silent after oikawa’s admission and you were honestly a little surprised that he said what he said. iwaizumi would always be his best friend, but now that he was a father and a married man, there were other things more important than friendships. he wouldn’t allow iwaizumi or maki to ruin his son’s birthday nor disrespect you and get away with it. enough was enough.

“wow. you’re unreal you know that?” maki scoffed, standing up from iwaizumi’s lap and gathering her things.

you watched quietly as the two left the group of y’all and went out the gate to their car. once they were out of sight, you released a breath you didn’t know you were holding and relaxed.

“are you ok?” emma asked you while kyōtani rubbed your shoulders gently.

“girl, i almost dog walked a pregnant lady! that was some scary shit.” you laughed, coming down from the adrenaline rush.

at your joke, the others laughed and slowly eased the residual tension. “is it wrong that i would’ve definitely paid to see that?” tendou asked.

“yeah, cause then i’d have to arrest you guys.” daichi commented, walking over from the grill with tongs in his hands and an apron on that said ‘kiss the cop.’

you were 100% sure suga bought that as a gag gift that daichi took literally.

“oh here comes officer daichi. always killing the vibe.” tanaka said sarcastically, to which earned him a slap to the back of the head by kiyoko.

“yeah yeah, come on so we can eat.” he muttered before going back over to ushijima.

as everyone stood up to gather the kids and get ready to eat, you and kyōtani stayed behind to talk.

“you okay princess?” he asked, sitting next to you in emma’s spot and pulling you in for a hug.

you nodded, grateful for his presence. “i love you kentaro.”

“i love you more baby. always.”

NOTE. i hope you guys liked this final installment! i know a few of you asked for a part two, so i hope this did you justice! thank you for reading!

↬︎ join the taglist: @sweeneyblue1 @knjkitten @namjoonswifeyy @supop @exomama-random-writing @sunrayyellowhalo @pimpnameyannie @brownmochi

[kpostedsum]

high | d.m

summary: you find an unhealthy way of coping after draco cheats on you

warnings: drug use (marijuana) angsty¿, cheating, illusions to sex

song: habits - tove lo

a/n: this fic isn’t meant to romanticize drug use in any way. i also know nothing abt weed so LOL and very rushed & not edited

masterlist | taglist

I eat my dinner in my bathtub

Then I go to sexclubs

Watching freaky people gettin' it on

It doesn't make me nervous

If anything I'm restless

Yeah, I've been around and I've seen it all

you had a few minutes left of your charms class which was your last class before the weekend. you wanted nothing more than to get out of here and cuddle up with your boyfriend— who was enjoying his free period right now.

draco was one of the best boyfriends you could ask for, the frequent dates, gifts, and attention— it was more than you could wish for.

“you’re excused. you essays are due at the beginning of next week” snapes monotone voice dragged on as you quickly packed up your things and made your way to the slytherin common room.

I get home, I got the munchies

Binge on all my Twinkies

Throw up in the tub

Then I go to sleep

And I drank up all my money

Days get kinda lonely

entering the slytherin common room your eyes immediately searched for a certain blond boy, yet he was nowhere to be found. you made your way to the boys dorms in hopes of finding him there but you’re quickly interrupted by two familiar voices.

“why hello y/n, marvellous weather we’re having today aren’t we?” theo asked looking towards the ceiling and smiling as if he were outside, blaise blocking your path as he did so.

“i’m not sure what weather you’re talking about since we’re inside but i am okay thank you” you responded with a chuckle, trying to make your way past blaise.

“wait y/n” he stopped you. “can i borrow the astronomy notes? i would ask luna but i can’t find her anywhere” blaise continued.

they both seemed awfully on edge and anxious, you figured it was just quidditch nerves getting to them since there was an upcoming game this week.

“i have yet to finish my astronomy notes, but i did see luna in the great hall if you want her notes. now if you’d excuse me i’d like to see draco” you said trying to push past the two boys who still wouldn’t let you through.

“forget malfoy! let’s do something instead, we’re so much more fun than him, right blaise?” theo said giving blaise a pointed look as he threw his arm around your shoulder.

“right you are nott, let’s go!” blaise continued also throwing his arm around your shoulder and leading you away from the boys dorm.

“what? no, i have plans with draco. now excuse me” you said pushing them both off and heading towards dracos door.

as you get closer to his door you can hear heavy breathing, pants and skin slapping on skin. you’re confused, you figured draco would be taking a nap or running over drills for quidditch practice. the closer you get, the louder the noises become.

“pans, you feel so good”

you recognize that voice anywhere.

You're gone and I gotta stay

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

quickly you turned your head towards blaise and theo who had their heads lowered in shame, refusing to meet your gaze. “is this some kind of sick joke, are you guys pulling a prank or something because this isn’t funny” you said seriously not wanting to believe what you’re hearing from inside of your boyfriends dorm.

“we’re sorry, we tried to convince him not too but he wouldn’t listen” theo muttered silently.

it felt like your world was breaking apart slowly. just not too long ago you were excited to spend a weekend with your boyfriend who you loved so dearly, the same boyfriend who you’ve been dating for years, the same boyfriend who gets jealous about how much time you spend with his mum rather than him.

with shaky fingers you put your hand on the door knob and quickly pushed the door open, already preparing for the worst.

there he was, wrapped up with parkinson in the same bed you two shared not even twenty-four hours ago. her body straddling his naked, just like yours was doing the night before. you stood there frozen, mouth agape— not even knowing what to do with yourself.

“baby, i can explain, just please— y/n please don’t leave” draco said pushing pansy off of him, shuffling on his pants and reaching out towards you.

“dont touch me, malfoy!” you yelled and everyone froze. “you lost the right to touch me the minute you even thought of touching her” you continued sending both him and pansy a glare with tears threatening to slip from your eyes.

“darling please, i can explain—”

“no draco, we’re done just leave me alone, please” your voice cracking at the end as you pushed past blaise and theo rushing towards the girls dormitory.

Spend my days locked in a haze

Trying to forget you babe

I fall back down

Gotta stay high all my life

To forget I'm missing you

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

it’s been days since you last left your room, days since you last saw draco. daphne would come by and check on you but you’d always dismiss her, wanting to be alone. regret is one word to describe how you’ve been feeling— you gave him everything and he threw it away so carelessly for a quick hook up.

you missed waking up against his smooth skin in his embrace, tracing the lines and scars across his porcelain skin as you waited for him to wake up, the way he’d try to kiss you in the morning without brushing his teeth and you wouldn’t let him because of morning breath— but he’d still do it anyways.

you missed him, but he didn’t want you anymore.

maybe it was something you’ve done, you’ve been quite busy with work recently so you haven’t been spending as much time with him as normal. he was probably lonely and trying to seek the attention you lacked to give him.

getting up, you stared at yourself in the mirror picking yourself apart. you were pretty, it was a well known fact around hogwarts, maybe he thought she was prettier. she was the life of the party and always up for some mischief whereas you preferred to do stuff in silence and would rather be with a small group of people. maybe he liked how exciting she was in comparison to you, she probably brought a spark of excitement to his life that you couldn’t.

dreading to feel something you quickly showered and got ready to leave your room hoping to run into a specific set of twins.

Pick up daddies at the playground

How I spend my daytime

Loosen up the frown,

Make them feel alive

I'll make it fast and greasy

I'm on my way to easy

“well what can we do for you today” fred said to you with a cheeky smile plastered across his face.

“do you have any muggle herb left?” you asked in a low voice making sure no one heard you.

“maybe we do, maybe we don’t” george said. “how much are you offering in exchange though” he continued.

“ten galleons for three ounces, is that enough” you said pulling the galleons out of your pockets and placing them in george’s palm.

“it was a pleasure doing business with you” they said in unison as fred placed the tiny baggie in your pocket so no one would see.

once you returned to your dormitory you quickly pulled out the pre-rolled muggle herb, lit it and let yourself forget.

You're gone and I gotta stay

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

Spend my days locked in a haze

Trying to forget you babe

I fall back down

Gotta stay high all my life

To forget I'm missing you

you started showing up to class late with red tired eyes, not caring about the looks you got. at this point every one knew what had happened but you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

the muggle herb brought you a sense of bliss and freedom, a new feeling you haven’t felt before but something that you now craved.

“are you high right now?” draco said as he sat himself in the seat beside you.

“since when do you care about what i’m doing” you said sharply, not wanting to talk with him.

“love, you don’t smoke. who gave that stuff to you, i’ll kill them—”

“no you won’t.” you said turning towards him. “you won’t do any of that because you don’t own me and i’m not your girlfriend anymore. so mind your business malfoy, i’m sure parkinson’s waiting for you”

the rest of the class you both sat in silence working on potions that draco did most of since you weren’t in the correct mind state and he wasn’t willing to let his mark falter over your slip up.

you find it amazing how even when you’re on drugs he still looks amazing. the way his nose curves perfectly with a slight bump, and the way his hands move with caution as he pours the potion into the waste bucket.

“look, i’m sorry for what happened with pansy. it didn’t mean anything i swear, i don’t know why i did it but i regret it with my life” draco said breaking your thoughts, he looked older than normal and had dark circles underneath his under eyes. you wondered why he looked so distraught when he wasn’t the one who got cheated on.

“a sorry isn’t going to fix this draco” you told him. he knew you were right but he didn’t want to admit it. he hadn’t talked to pansy since the day you walked in on them, the guilt has been eating him up inside. he stayed silent and didn’t bother respond to you, he knew anything he said would have made the situation worst than it already is— but how he wished you were still his sweet y/n.

“now if you excuse me, i have some fun to attend too” you said leaving him alone as you made your way back to your dorm.

Staying in my play pretend

Where the fun, it got no end

Can't go home alone again

Need someone to numb the pain

You're gone and I gotta stay

High all the time

To keep you off my mind

over the last few weeks, you couldn’t remember the last time you were sober. you started skipping classes to smoke and avoiding your friends so they’d stop questioning your habits.

you were forgetting and that’s all that mattered, you didn’t care how it was affecting your health— it made you feel better. sometimes you wished there was another way, another way to forget how he held you at night pressing soft kisses to your skin, another way to forget the way he took pansy the same way he took you. you wonder if he feels as sorry as he looks, he’s the one who cheated so he can’t possibly care that much.

you hear two knocks at your door which quickly break you from your state making you more attentive, cleaning yourself up and opening the door. there stood draco— his eyes red as well, like hes been crying.

“y/n listen, i know what i did was wrong and that i tried to pretend it wasn’t me but please. i didn’t mean too, you mean the world to me. i miss you so much love.” he pleaded with you.

“y’know draco, i miss you too” you admitted. “but i’ve found a way to forget about you, maybe you should do the same”.

Gotta stay high all my life

To forget I'm missing you

-

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