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mutenized · 2 years ago

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Celebrity Skin

Eddie Munson x Rockstar!AFAB! Reader

It’s 1991 and Robin forced all of her friends to go to a concert with her for her birthday. Without listening to the band, Eddie agreed to go without knowing what was to come. Who knew being considered a ‘freak’ all his life would lead him to find a kindred soul in the grunge-rock’s princess.

Word count: 2k

CW: 18+ MINORS TURN AWAY. SHOO. mentions of drug and alcohol abuse, small mention of distressing and manipulative/abusive father, mention of a Playboy Magazine.

A/N: it’s 1991 in the story so Eddie is 25 and reader is 22. Thank you for the support on the first part! I don’t know if I should make this a mini series or an actual series, you all let me know! Also my requests are open if you want any concepts to be done or you have ideas to be written about!

Part one / / Masterlist

Eddie edit by @eddiemunsons-missingnipple

Fate was never a concept you believed in. It was never a ‘right place right time’ scenario but that all seemed to change the moment you screamed “Goodnight Indianapolis!” into the microphone and disappeared off the stage where a cool towel and ice water awaited you in your managers hands. Thanking her as you chugged the bottle and wrapped the towel around your shoulders, you began to notice her dismayed face and the thin line between her brows which only appeared when she experiences ‘great stress.’

Spring had been like a mother to you from the moment you ran away at eighteen, the only thing you had was your guitar and a trash bag filled with what clothes your dad didn’t drench in gasoline before using it a tinder for the large fire in the backyard.

“Shoulda known you’re jus’ like your life ruining mother. First the fuckin’ loud ass music then these whore clothes. Then comin’ home marked up?!” The venom in his alcohol-laced rage sent you on edge as you watched him throw your signed Siouxsie Sioux vinyl into the pile of burning rubble that once was your beloved items. That’s when that snap broke and began to pack up what you could fit into the back of your run down car. You didn’t care if it broke down, as long as it did thousands of miles away from suburbia.

That’s what you got. Finding home in Brooklyn, you had found a spot on the street and began to make the backseat your new bed. After a few days of watching you, Spring and her partner Mac knocked on your window.

Okay, maybe that time was right place right time. The question you were about to ask died on your tongue as Mac made their way up to you and the rest of the band who now joined you off stage.

“The openers dropped out of the rest of the tour.” They informed you, the thin line between Spring’s brows reappearing as a groan left Ryder’s lips. Your guitarist, and best friend, had a bad feeling about them when they were interviewed for the spot months ago. This was his ‘I told you so’ as he shot you a side glance, walking beside you as the band and the team moved down the narrow hallway.

“Goddamn, what does the label say? It’s the beginning of tour, we need an opener!” Thalia, the band’s bassist, declared which earned her a sharp stare from Mac and Spring. “They said it’s up to us and to let them know. Our next show is in two days. Within that timeframe we need to find a band that aligns with us, who can sign a contract agreeing to tour, and that the label likes.”

Spring rubbed her temples as Mac handed her a cigarette from behind their ear before lighting it for her. “I had an idea.” They spoke, pausing before the door that led to the crowd of fans that sat waiting by their tour bus. “We’re going to be here for a few days. I’m from Indianapolis and their underground music scene has always thrived. How about open auditions?”

Before, the band and management had three bands to pick from that the label had pre-approved. This time, it was free rein, all together chaos. You loved it. “Let’s let them know when we get into the bus. I don’t know where we’ll hold it but let’s do it.” Your voice was sturdy and in control which was a shock for the two managers, more afraid that you’d tear down the venue and end the lives of each of the opening band’s members. That you’d dream of, already having to be talked to by executives about your loud, party girl nature. If any of your antics got publicized your band would be cut. Not wanting to put you and your friend’s dreams at risk so you turned down the copious bottles of alcohol and small baggies filled with nose candy that you would partake in only once in a while. Instead of engaging that, you disappeared for two months to a rehab facility to cut yourself clean of your vices, though an occasional joint and cigarette didn’t hurt.

Mac only hummed as Spring and her assistant disappeared to start calling up studios in the area to see if they had two open days free. Meanwhile, Mac guided Thalia, Ryder, Marcus, and you out into the cool night, the breeze welcomed as sweat still lingered on your skin. The peaceful moment hidden behind the brick walls of the alleyway was disturbed by the screams of fans once they caught sight of Ryder’s bright red Mohawk and angular face as he stepped out into the streetlights.

This part of the night never got old, no matter how big the began to get. The fans who helped the group’s dreams come true, supporting them through every aspect. The least you could do was sign some magazines and take some photos for someone to later get developed and paste on their wall. Today, though, excitement filled your veins with a joy unlike any other drug could have. You were searching for those doe eyes and the messy, curled hair that reminded you of your friend, Chris Cornell’s. All night the two of you would meet gazes, a wink or suggestive lyric being dedicated to him just to get under his skin which made the other male he was with howl with laughter as his face kept turning a red shade. Then, like magnets, your gazes connected again.

As soon as you stepped off the stage, Eddie shoved whatever cash he had to Steve who was already doing a merchandise run for Nancy and Robin. Steve shot him an eyebrow wiggle before chuckling when Eddie shoved him away all before grabbing the other two of his friends and shoving through the equally as eager crowd with no care as he was yelled and glared at. The two girls apologized enough for him, though they didn’t truly mean it. That man was on a mission and without him, they wouldn’t be leaned up against the same metal bars as before, the ones that held them in like cattle.

Chatting between his small group, Eddie pulled Steve in as he tried to politely nudge his way through the crowd. Once finally with his friends, Nancy laughed before fixing his shirt. “Should have let Eddie give you that makeover he offered. You stick out like a sore thumb, in the worst way possible.” Her words made Steve roll his eyes and let out a playful ‘blegh’ while handing the cassette Robin requested to her as well as the tank top she eyed but wouldn’t buy for herself. A gift from Steve to her. Nancy gently grabbed the tour exclusive vinyl that she had read about in Rolling Stone, holding it to her chest hopefully. For Eddie, though, Steve held back a laugh before handing him the recent Playboy magazine which starred you as their cover and centerfold. “So you have something of sustenance.” He smirked, handing him the bundle set of cassettes for his van.

Just as Eddie was going to return an equally snarky jab, screams and hollering erupted like a volcano from the crowd. Instantly, his chocolate colored orbs desperately searching for yours like it was his dying wish. The moment they met, a smile fell on his pierced feature and his breath stuttering for half a moment all before you began to saunter your way over to him, greeting other fans on the way over.

Your breath caught in your throat as the distance between the mystery man and you closed. Now you stood in front of him with a smile, hand outstretched for Robin as a huge, genuine grin played on your features. “Happy birthday, bitch!” You exclaimed, poking the button before pulling out a marker and perking a brow. “The band wants to take you out for a round of drinks, if that’s cool with you guys? We just have to freshen up and all, don’t want to be sweaty around pretty people such as yourself.”

A blush dusted Robin’s freckled features as she struggled to form an answer while you signed the cassette tape in her hands. “She is meaning to say yes.” Steve laughed, staring at his best friend with wide eyes as if to say ‘what the fuck, get it together dude.’ “Yea! Yes!” Her voice broke, wide eyes settling on you as your hand glided over Nancy’s vinyl with ease.

“Perfect,” accentuating the ‘per, “give us half an hour after we leave, we’re at the Biltmore down the rode and there’s a bar there.” Sending her a wink, your eyes focused back on Eddie, nerves now subsided as you’re presented with your playboy spread. A devilish smirk overcame you, tapping the capped tip of the marker on the paper. “God choice. Made sure all money spent on these would go to women’s rights movements as well as LGBT protecting foundations.” Signing right above your head, you look up to Eddie through your lashes with your bottom lip coyly tucked between your teeth.

To say he was stunned was an understatement, his eyes taking you in as Nancy placed a hand on his back. “Eddie is his name. He’s been drooling over you since the moment you walked out. Birthday bitch is Robin, that’s Steve, and I’m Nancy!” Her smile was bright and you swore you could see her being chased after promoters to be a model.

“Hey!” The taller male choked out as you moved on to continue signing things for other fans, a laugh leaving you as you took in his nervous voice crack. “Well Eddie, I hope you come along for drinks. I’d love to see you there.” Sending him a wink, your attention went back to conversing with other fans all before disappearing into the unmarked vehicles that were set up behind the large tour bus.

Turning to leave, a loud voice caught their attention which paused the group in motion. “EVERYONE!” Mac shouted, a megaphone pressed to their mouth, “due to unforeseen circumstances, the opener for this tour has dropped out. We will be hosting open calls tomorrow and Saturday at Velocity Records starting at 10 AM. Be there early to secure a spot! Note that you MUST be ready with a set before joining us, as you will be thrown right into the swing of things. Thank you, get home safe!”

Three pairs of eyes bore holes into Eddie’s skull, his mouth agape. Fate, this must be fate.

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nyotasaimiri · 2 years ago

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Arc Two (redux) 97

Nyota settled back comfortably and accepted a bottle of water from Tarvei. “Thank you. Is there anything else I should know at the moment?”

“Not sure there’s much more to tell,” Lumen told her. He pulled a pocket-watch out of his vest pocket and checked it, then shut it with a sharp little click. “We got most of them Occasus, think a few ran for it. Arjun’s been chattin’ with Esther, and Esther’s botherin’ them folks at the Outpost, to figure how they hide their little meteor there. We oughta be able to tuck this place away. It’ll be right safe soon enough.”

“Making contact with the Outpost has been a boon for our camps as well,” Lana said. “The technique is reliable for evading Miniknog sensors.”

“Good.” Nyota nodded. “You handled that well.” It was reassuring to know she could leave everything in Lumen’s hands if she had to. He was proving ever more capable as her second in command.

“Okay, but you gotta hear all about how the scuffle went, Captain,” Sonny said, jumping in with a bright gleam. “See, they had this big robot thing, like the one that went for Hadley. And somebody shot my arm. That wasn’t nice. But then all them wispers woke right up, and froze the robot stiff as a fencepost! Then Namina popped in and smacked the ol’ thing to pieces!”

Nyota sat up a little straighter. “Namina is here?”

“Sure is. Brought him and Eldie with me,” Lumen told her. He checked his pocket-watch again. “Now, I know yer gonna tell me she ain’t a fighter, but it was her idea.”

“No, I trust your judgment, and hers,” Nyota told him. The thought still sent a sour coil of anxiety through her stomach. Oldarva had learned well, but she was still untried in actual combat… “Were they hurt?”

“Nah, they’re both right as rain,” Lumen told her. He hummed, warm orange glow growing murky. “But I told them to catch up with us when they could. Shoulda been here by now.” He tapped the microphone on his collar. “Hey Ferny, where are ya?”

Namina’s voice crackled through, too quiet for Nyota to pick out the words from where she was sitting. Lumen listened and nodded along. Stopped. Whistled.

The microphone crackled again, and Sonny giggled. “Dang, that’s a good swear.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Lumen muttered. “Forgot the mic picks that up so hard. But whatcha mean she caught a prisoner?”

Nyota sat up. Her back twinged; she ignored it. “She what?”

Lumen held up a hand to stall questions as he listened intently to Namina’s voice, humming in quiet surprise as Namina told him the gist. “Well how ‘bout that. Thank ya kindly, y’all just stay there then.”

Nyota waited as Lumen gathered his thoughts, trying to at least seem patient while she burned with questions.

Hadley asked one for her. “What’s this about a prisoner? Occasus don’t surrender.”

Lumen shrugged. “This one did. Eldie said that Fern-fangs already searched them, so we ain’t got a sneak attack or sneak-spy to worry about, no weapons or wireless or nothin’. I dunno what’s up, but I trust Oldarva.” He looked right at Nyota. “She sure knows when a person oughta be spared.”

The words sent a shiver through Nyota and made her fur rise with something that had no relation to cold or fear. “Yes. You’re right.” It felt right. Lumen didn’t know—he couldn’t know what had happened between them so many months ago. But she felt that he did have a guess, somehow.

She closed her eyes and shut out as many distractions as she could, searching her mind for options. “I do not want to leave our crewmates alone out there, though. Or send them both back to our ship with a potentially volatile element.”

Tarvei raised a hand. “I’ll go look after them, sis. It’s not a bad run to get there, and we should get Hadley back to the ship soon anyway.”

“Now hold on,” Hadley cut in, half-rising in indignation before Tarvei’s hand caught her shoulder and gently pushed her back down. It said much of her condition that she did not protest, but fierce resistance still burned in her mauve eyes. “I’m not going anywhere just yet. I want to see what’s back there. Has to be something good after the fight that rock put up.”

“Ya oughta rest,” Lumen told her, and she turned her fiery glare on him. “C’mon, lil’ Firebrand. Ya know I ain’t gonna order ya, it’s no good to push so hard.”

Nyota cleared her throat; Hadley looked down. “We stay together,” she said, quiet but firm, and Hadley looked up again with a mix of confusion and hope. “Lumen, please ask Oldarva to bring her prisoner here. SAIL can keep our ship safe on its own, and I can think of no more secure place right now than the Vault, in either case.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Lumen was thoughtful, she could see that in the bubbling under his shell. But not upset—he was intrigued. “What’s the plan, then?”

Nyota gestured at their makeshift camp. “I’ll warm some rations for us. We will rest here until they arrive, and I will question this captive myself. I want to see why Oldarva thought them worth saving.”

#arc two #repost

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thetragicallynerdy · 2 years ago

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love your ofmd writing :) how about something with Jim and Olu, maybe Olu gives Jim a gift and they Cannot Handle It?

aww thank you so much!! and ooh yes, love this prompt!!

there be christmas times ahead! this takes place in the cowboy 'verse because I'm feeling cowboy times right now hahaha

They woke to the smell of salt pork frying. Salt pork, and maybe flapjacks, something sweet cutting the smell of oil and rich meat. Three months ago and they woke every time Oluwande stirred in bed beside them. And now here they were, sleeping through breakfast preparations.

They struggled upright, yawning and rubbing the sleep out of their eyes. "Shoulda woken me, I'd have helped."

Oluwande laughed and turned to grin at them from his place by the stove. "I tried." He pitched his voice into a growly approximation of theirs. "'Lemme sleep, Olu. I don't wanna, Olu. It's cold, Olu.'"

"Fuck off, I don't sound like that," they laughed, flipping him off. The worst part was, they could believe it, even if they hadn't been awake enough to remember it. They weren't meant for snow. They'd been thinking very seriously about trying to convince Oluwande to move down to Mexico.

"You do," he said gleefully, practically dancing over to them. He leaned down, pressed a kiss to their mouth. "Morning. Merry Christmas."

Jim kissed him again, smiling against his mouth. His delight was infectious. "Merry Christmas."

They traded kisses for a few minutes before Oluwande pulled away. "Wait here, okay? I've got something for you."

They crossed their legs under the covers, dragging the spare quilt around their shoulders. Even with how warm the cabin was they were still cold. Goddamn winter.

Oluwande dug around in a cupboard before crossing back to the bed with a parcel in his hand, all wrapped in brown paper and a pretty red ribbon. He sat on the bed beside them, and placed it gently in their lap.

Jim looked at it, then at him. "Um. What's this?"

"A Christmas gift," he said, beaming at them. "I've been saving it for like, a month, so I don't want to wait any longer."

They swallowed. Their hands felt too heavy, moving automatically to pick it up. It wasn't heavy, but whatever was inside was soft. "But I didn't -" they swallowed again. "I didn't get you anything."

His face softened. "Yeah, I know. You didn't need to. I just - really wanted to get you this, okay?" When they just stared at him a little helplessly he reached out and took their hand, giving it a squeeze. "Really. It's okay that you don't have something for me."

They wanted to run. Not far. Not like last time. But the urge was still there, to drag on their boots and coat and go hide in the barn until their chest felt less like it had been trapped in a vice. It was just too much. He was too kind, and they loved him too damn much.

They hadn't even fucking thought about gifts. Christmas with Nana had been austere, a time for Church and praying for vengeance and not much else. Cake, sometimes, and a meal with the other nuns. And then they'd left, and Christmas had become just another day spent alone.

But there was far too much hope on Oluwande's face for them to run. He'd gotten them a gift. He had gotten them a gift. If they ran now, they'd crush that hope like a spring flower under their boot. Even if he understood. Even if he said it was fine when they came crawling back.

Jim's hands lighted on the gift, calloused fingers plucking at the ribbon. They looked at him, then back at it. "Should I..."

"Yeah, go ahead. If you want."

They untied the ribbon carefully. They weren't one for pulling their hair back with pretty ribbons and bows, but maybe it could go in Tangerine's mane, or tied around their wrist. Or in their journal, pressed between worn pages to be kept safe. Slowly, all too aware of Oluwande watching them, of their own heart beating too fast, they pulled back crisp brown paper.

Inside lay a soft red shirt, with shiny white buttons down the front and a crisp new collar. Their breath caught.

"The one from the Swede's shop," they breathed, fingers stroking the fabric. It was light, beautifully woven, and so fine they feared their callouses would catch on it. And red, so beautifully red. They'd seen it weeks ago, hanging up in his window, and couldn't help but admire it. It was the sort of thing they always wanted to wear, but never had. They'd been taught far too many times to never draw attention to themself, to never be too flashy. Being memorable was dangerous.

But here, everyone already knew them. Being memorable here was safety, was friends who would have your back and a partner who would always have a place for you in his home. It meant people who knew them, and loved them, and didn't care if they forgot the things that normal people did, like giving gifts at Christmas.

And maybe it meant wearing a bright red shirt, with shiny new buttons, a gift that they hadn't been expecting and certainly didn't deserve.

"Saw you lookin' at it," Oluwande said softly. "The colour suits you."

Jim gathered the shirt to their chest and held it close. Tears prickled at the edges of their eyes. "I love it. So much. Gracias, Olu."

He accepted their hug with open arms, smudging a kiss to their shoulder through the worn longjohns of his that they kept stealing. Jim hugged him as fiercely as they could, arms tight around his neck.

"Feliz Navidad," Oluwande whispered. "Te amo."

Jim nodded, burying their face in his shoulder. "Yo también te amo. Feliz Navidad, Olu."

#jim jimenez #oluwande boodhari #ofmd #our flag means death #jim ofmd #our flag means death fanfiction #ofmd fanfiction #tragicallynerdy writes #christmas #chrissmuss #ye olde holiday prompts #asks #prompt fill #thank uuuu!!!

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silvertonedwords · 3 years ago

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Goldstein Sisters, Together

A little sister reunion/Together prequel for you.

See on a03

“Jacob?” Tina opens the apartment door wider, backing up before Mrs. Esposito hears them. Nobody ever comes to see her here. She curls a hand around her wand, still in its harness from work, just in case. “What’s wrong—is—”

“Oh, no, honey, everyone’s fine. Newt’s fine.”

Tina freezes at that voice, stumbling back a few more steps.

Jacob smiles. “There’s just someone who wants to see ya.”

Tina’s vision blurs, and it feels like she can’t catch her breath. “Queenie?” she gasps, but the sound is strangled, barely intelligible.

Her sister steps around Jacob and walks into their apartment—always their apartment, for she could never bear to think of it as anything else—pushing the door shut behind her.

“Hi, Teen,” she says softly.

“It’s—it’s you?” Tina squeaks.

“It’s her,” Jacob confirms, his hand resting on Queenie’s back.

Tina looks between them, and everything rushes in so powerfully that the part of her that recognizes that this is her sister knows that all of these feelings are flooding into her mind. Guilt about their fight, and about not having been the one to bring her back, about failing to be the protective big sister she’s always, always been. Anger for Queenie’s recklessness, that she ran away, and for how she was taken in by a madman, and her stubborn inability to see reason all those months ago. Hurt at being left alone, the only Goldstein, at a time when she really, really needed her sister, and hurt at Queenie missing everything that’s happened in her life, and at missing everything that’s happened in Queenie’s. The aching, overwhelming loneliness of their time apart, and regret for how they left things, and relief, and frustration, and hope, and love.

She doesn’t have to speak any of it. Some part of her had nearly forgotten what that felt like, but the rest of her has always, always remembered.

“I’m so sorry, Teen. So sorry. I’m with you all; I promise I am. I never shoulda—“

Tina pulls her sister into her arms, her tears, once released, flowing freely. She cries quietly into her sister’s shoulder while Queenie rubs her back, and she recognizes distantly that Queenie is crying, too.

“I’m so sorry,” Queenie repeats.

“You left,” Tina says angrily, “for that madman.” And then, more gently, “I never stopped hoping—I tried anything I could think of to find you and bring you back and I thought about you every day and—“

“I know, I know.”

They look at each other, and Tina holds her sister’s face between her hands. “You’re back?” Her voice is soft, hopeful, afraid, like the little girl at a funeral watching their world fall apart.

“I’m back.”

Really back? For good?

“For good. I promise.” Queenie says to her thoughts.

They embrace again and separate only after several quiet minutes, laughing tearfully.

Tina takes in her sister’s appearance. Her hair is icy, almost, her eyes tired and worn. “Queenie, what I said before, about Jacob and everything. I’m sorry. I was—I was afraid I’d lose you.” And then I did.

“I know, Teen. Of course I know. I’m sorry ‘bout what I said, too.”

You were right, Tina thinks, swiping away a tear. I’m not brave enough to be reckless with my heart, and I was jealous that you were, and I threw myself into work and made myself blind to what would make you happy.

“I wasn’t right. Not about all of it. I’m so proud of how much you care about your work. Head Auror! Momma ’n Poppa would be so proud’a you.”

Tina laughs wetly.

“I shouldn’t’a said you only care about work. And what I said about Newt—“

Jacob chimes in, as though unable to help himself. “Wait, what did she say about Newt?”

With her hands still linked in her sister’s, Tina explains briefly about the magazine, about Queenie’s certainty that there must be more to the story, until that final, bitter fight, when Queenie had thrown Newt’s supposed disinterest in her sister’s face.

Jacob laughs. “So that’s why you were so. In Paris. Oh, poor guy.”

Tina feels a stab of guilt. It still aches that she hurt Newt for those first few hours together, and during the weeks when she suddenly, from his point of view, lost interest in writing to him. Seeing their time together without the blind of her own pain, she can easily conjure up his wide, confused eyes and fumbling hands.

“Oh, Tina,” Queenie sighs, “It really didn’t seem like Newt’s worried about any of that anymore.”

Tina’s heart lurches hopefully. “You saw him?”

“M-hm,” Queenie confirms, smiling. “Oh, I’m so glad the two’a you are finally—“

Tina smiles as the warmth of their recent letters fills her chest. And then her smile falls a little. She still hasn’t managed to take that risk, not fully.

Queenie cups her sister’s face and looks at her, smiling but serious. “You are brave, Tina. You are so brave.”

Tina shakes her head, smiling tentatively despite herself.

Queenie holds each of Tina’s hands and backs away to look at the clothes she still hasn’t changed. “Oh, look at you, career girl!”

Tina laughs.

“So,” Jacob says, wandering over to the kitchen. “Dinner?”

-&-

Tina keeps looking back at Queenie while they get ready for bed, as though her sister might be a phantom she’s dreamt up after a particularly sleepless week of work.

Queenie had insisted that she was absolutely staying with her sister, at least for a while, and had her own moment of tears to find that Tina had always kept her bed ready, just in case.

They last a couple of minutes in their own beds before Queenie crawls out of her own bed and into her sister’s, just like they had when they were little girls.

They sit against Tina’s headboard in the dark, barely squeezing into the twin bed, and talk for hours.

Tina hears about everything that’s happened in Europe and beyond, and about Queenie’s plans with Jacob. She fills her sister in on life at MACUSA, their old friends, the little changes that have happened to their street.

“Aren’t you leavin’ somethin’ out?” Queenie asks. “Or, someone?”

Tina blushes and looks down. It is a relief to once more let the thoughts flow without having to give shape to them with her voice. That she’s never done this before, felt this before, or even thought it was possible for her. What if—

Their letters have been so much more, lately, so intimate. Tina knows how he feels. But she doesn’t understand it. She believes in him, just not that he could be so in awe of her, when he is so extraordinary.

Tina sits quietly as Queenie absorbs all of this. “Why wouldn’t he be as taken with you as you are with him?” she asks.

“You sound like Momma,” Tina says.

Queenie takes her sister’s hand. “Everythin’ you feel for him. He feels that for you, too.”

“Queenie, I don’t know if you should—“

“You shoulda seen him when we got to his flat in London, Lookin’ for you.”

“I know.” Tina looks at her hands. “He’s told me. But what if we don’t—”

Queenie gives her a withering look, then softens when she sees her sister’s tears. “Teenie. What are you afraid of?”

Again, Tina lets Queenie wade through her thoughts. Her trust in both her own and Newt’s feelings, and yet her knowledge that this thing between them will be—is—will be a force she cannot fight. Her fear of letting herself love like that, after this year of being so alone and wanting things she cannot or will not let herself have. The weeks before Paris, after Queenie left, truly alone for the first time in her life, angry and hurt and feeling guilty, and forcing herself not to take out Newt��s letters or acknowledge her broken heart, and wishing desperately for a sister to talk to. And the weeks after Paris, and new, beautiful letters, and fearing that she’d never get to say to her sister you were right; there was more to the magazine story, and he’d kept this picture of me, and the way he looks at me. The terror of wanting this thing so much, and how easily she could fall even harder. Pouring all of her love into raising a little sister who left, and in such a horrible way, after a bitter fight, and to a madman who represents everything Tina had thought she’d taught her sister was wrong. Feeling like maybe it would break her to give any more of her love away.

“Oh,” Queenie says softly, her voice trembling. “Oh, I’m—“

“I didn’t mean—“ Tina starts, grasping her sister’s hand.

“No. No it’s okay. I—I’m sorry.”

“I know you are. I know.” And for the first time that night, Tina hugs her sister not for herself but for Queenie, to comfort her as she used to when they crowded into Tina’s bed at their aunt’s house, and Tina sang the same song their mother used to until Queenie fell asleep.

“I just mean—“ once he’s in, he’s staying.

“Teenie. You let him in a long, long time ago.”

Tina sniffs and dashes away her tears, grateful that Queenie hasn’t let her hand go. “He was in New York once, a few months ago. Just for a day. His publisher sent him for a meeting with one of the booksellers for Ilvermorny.”

Queenie arches an eyebrow. “And you don’t suppose seein’ you had anythin’ to do with his agreein’ to come?”

Tina sighs. “I know it did. I think he woulda—I was quiet. I think he was a little confused.”

“I’ve been around him, remember? He doesn’t understand why you haven’t—but he understands. And he isn’t upset, or angry, or anythin’. Just waitin’.”

“I know,” Tina whispers.

“He’d come runnin’ in a heartbeat the second you asked.”

And that’s part of what scares me, Tina thinks.

Tina thoughts jump back to their fight, and Queenie’s accusation of jealousy.

At the time, she’d been so angry and so blind, but she can admit now that her sister had been right. Beneath her genuine concern that being with Jacob would cause Queenie harm, her fierce need to protect her sister, there had been a small part of her that had stung with every evening Queenie slipped into the apartment late, her joy and laughter written across her face. Why did it have to be so easy for them? Oh, she hadn’t envied them everything—not the doe-eyed flirting over dinner, how boldly they showed their preference for anyone to see, the danger with the law their relationship might bring.

But their willingness to want and reach in one breath--to show each other their hearts…The fact that Queenie thought Jacob was wonderful, and he was hers if she’d have him...not like Tina, the one-who-shows-up-where-you’re-least-wanted, the girl everyone seemed to assume didn’t have a heart.

She’d been terribly jealous of their recklessness with their hearts.

Queenie tugs her sister’s hand into her lap. “Jacob’s asked him to be best man, y’know. So he’ll be coming to New York in a couple months anyway.”

Tina’s heart jumps, mostly happiness, and just a touch of fear.

Her sister nudges her shoulder. “Best man, maid of honor. I think you’ll have to share a dance at least.”

Tina finds herself excited at the prospect, even with her fear. Maybe she’ll finally, finally be brave.

“Teenie, you’re already brave.”

I am?

“‘Course you are. You were so young yourself, but you were a Momma and Poppa to me. You took care’a me. You’ve always been there.”

I didn’t protect you very well lately, Tina thinks with a scoff.

“Yes, you did. Y’know, not everythin’s your fault.”

Tina sighs.

“It takes much more bravery to be afraid and do things anyway.”

“You were right about him, Queenie. When you said there must’ve been more to the story. He—“ she opens up the feelings to her sister’s mind. Her pain as they walked through the French records room, and his fumbling hands and words, and how he was looking at the picture of her, but she was looking at his face, suddenly seeing clearly how tender it was, how much he felt for her, and how desperately he wanted her to know it. His happy surprise when he found she’d read his book, and that breathless step closer, and her unembarrassed joy…”And he thought I was dating someone else, too. You told him that because I had coffee with that awful guy one time.”

Queenie shrugs.

“You were tryin’ to make him jealous,” Tina accuses.

“Hey, it’s a sister’s right, after he broke your heart, even if he didn’t mean to! As if you were gonna fall in love with anyone else.”

Tina swallows and looks down at their hands.

“Back when we—fought—when I said you don’t take enough risks with your heart. What I meant to say is. You have way too big a heart not to share it. ‘specially with him.”

Tina wipes tears away.

“You know he carries those pictures of you everywhere.”

Tina thinks of her own pictures of him, tucked securely into her desk here and at work. She takes them out sometimes and touches the edge of the paper and wants the portraits and their letters to be enough for now, and wants so much more.

“So what are you gonna do?” Queenie prompts. “I know you. You thought if you could just try hard enough, work hard enough, Grindelwald would be weaker, and the world would be safe, and you’d have me back. And then you might feel safer fallin’ in love. But Tina, it’s always gonna scare you a little. I know you trust Newt, but someday you gotta trust yourself.”

“Yeah,” Tina whispers.

She thinks of Queenie and Jacob, grateful that her first, fearful instinct with them was not borne out, no matter how much it still scares her, how valid her concerns. She’d always worried Queenie would struggle to find someone who could look past her surface. Being a legilimens seems glamorous to people, sure, but Tina knows it isn’t always. And Queenie’s gorgeous, but there’s so much more to her than that. Jacob sees it. As for Jacob—well, Tina’s seen what this year has been like for him, and she’s relieved to see him so happy.

“So be happy, too,” Queenie whispers. “Little steps, y’know. You’ve clearly already taken lots of big ones these past few months. Write to him and let him know you’re excited to see him in person.”

“Yeah, I—I will. Tomorrow.”

Queenie leans her head against her sister’s. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“You, too.”

“We should probably get some sleep, huh. You have work tomorrow and all.”

Tina wraps an arm around Queenie’s back. “No, not yet. We haven’t caught up nearly enough for me to fall asleep. And I may still be your big sister, but I think you’ve grown up enough for me to let go a little.”

“Okay,” Queenie agrees, and Tina can hear the smile in her voice, at everything the promise means.

“I love you. Even when we argue, and I know we’ll argue again, but hopefully never, ever like that, you will always be more important to me than you could possibly know.”

“You too,” Queenie says softly.

“Okay.” Tina takes a breath and lets everything settle. “Now, tell me, what did Jacob think of Hogwarts. That must’ve been quite an experience…”

#my writing #goldstein sisters #newtina #newtina fanfiction #together #queenie #goldstein sisters together #together prequel

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the-cult-of-russo · 4 years ago

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No Going Back

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Request : good morning. i wanna request number 8. “Maybe you should just leave now.” angst/fighting dialogue. to be correct it is for billy russo right?

A/N: yes it's my Billy boy :') he a lil soft in this though but also an asshole lmaooo not gonna lie, this one had me swept up in the emotion. It hit quite close to home and now I'm sad :')

Warnings: cursing, angst, sadness and heartbreak. Billy fucked up big time lol

Your hands were shaking as you slammed the door to your apartment. Tears stained your cheeks and you kicked your heels off before storming to your bedroom, grabbing a duffel bag and starting to pack his things that he'd left around. Heartbroken didn't even cover it.

You knew this would happen, it's why you fought against it for so long. But you were stupid and ended falling for his bullshit and now you were a mess.

You and Billy had been together officially for 7 months. You'd met a year ago at a bar and hit it off, but when he tried to take you home you'd denied him. That apparently piqued his interest even more. He'd always be at the bar every Friday when you went and it was always easy to just be yourself around him. You didn't take him up on his offer and he would offer every time. He never made it a secret that he wanted you.

But as the months drew on, you both got to know each other more and it became a sort of friendship. You had to admit you felt something when you looked forward to seeing him. He'd asked you once why you were so against it and you'd been pretty blunt with him. You knew of his reputation and you weren't into it. You didn't do one night stands or casual sex. You wanted a relationship, someone to settle down with. You wanted something real. You told him you didn't think he was capable of that and he'd break your heart.

Five months into knowing each other and he'd switched from just wanting to fuck you to wanting to actually date you and you'd still put up a fight. But as your feelings for him grew, he wore you down. The moment you agreed to that date, which he'd been over the moon about, everything changed.

It had been so easy to be with him. He treated you like a queen, was more affectionate than you'd have thought, and you enjoyed each other's company. He was busy with Anvil a lot so you didn't see him every day but he'd call if he couldn't see you or send you sweet texts. He swore to you up and down that he'd never hurt you, never do what you'd thought he would do when you turned him down all those times.

You'd see the looks women gave him when you went out together or were at an event as his date and sometimes you'd feel insecure. But he only had eyes for you it seemed and it reassured you. It lulled you into a false sense of security that he'd actually changed. That he actually cared about you.

But you were wrong. So very fucking wrong and now you were paying for it. You'd been having dinner with a friend you hadn't seen in a while when it happened. Your eyes finding Billy across the restaurant. He was sat with a pretty blonde, very up close and intimate as they whispered god knows what to each other. You'd felt your heart crack but tried to deny it. It was just flirting, nothing more. But then… he'd leaned in and kissed her.

You'd shot out of your seat so fast the chair fell over and ran out of the place like someone had lit a fire up your ass. And you knew he'd seen you because you heard him shouting your name as you jumped into a cab and left.

You hated yourself for being surprised at what he'd done. You'd told him this was exactly how it would go but he'd swore to you. And you allowed yourself to buy into his bullshit because you loved him.

Most of his things packed, you padded over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of wine, pouring a large glass. You swigged it in one and felt the warmth bloom in your chest. It did little to ease the hopeless sorrow that consumed you though.

There was a rough knock at your door and you heard Billy call your name loudly. You tensed, heart breaking all over again as the tears seemed to be never ending. You didn't want to talk to him, to even look at him. But this was it. You couldn't stay with him, not now. You'd never be able to trust him again. You knew you had to tell him it was done so you could lick your wounds and heal from the pain.

"Y/N, please… open the door," Billy begged from the other side. You walked over, unlocking it but not opening it as you stormed back off to your bedroom. You knew he'd let himself in. You heard his heavy footsteps entering as you shoved another of his shirts in the bag, one you liked to sleep with.

"Can we talk?" He asked hesitantly.

"No," you bit out, eyes snapping to him. His face fell when he saw you crying and he took a tentative step into the room.

"Please, Y/N, let me explain," he frowned. You laughed but it held no joy. Only a deep rooted pain that was latched onto your soul.

"Explain? Really? What, you gonna say you tripped and your mouth landed on hers?! I saw it with my own eyes, Billy! You don't need to explain anything!" You roared, pure pain lacing your words.

He clenched his jaw as he shook his head, eyes glassy as he stared at you.

"I'm-I'm sorry," he started softly, reaching out to grab your arm but you smacked it away harshly. He looked like a kicked puppy and you hated it. He didn't get to be upset about this.

"How long have you been fucking her then?" You asked snidely as you grabbed the duffel bag, holding it in a death grip.

"I haven't fucked her," he muttered quietly. You snorted deprecatingly and he bit down on his lower lip.

"Yet?" You asked knowingly. His guilty glance to the floor told you everything you needed to know.

"How long, Billy? How long have you been cheating on me?" You asked, your voice wavered but your gaze had nothing but fire in it and he shifted where he stood. He couldn't look at you.

"A month. It was always one night, I never went back to someone," he frowned. Pain clawed its way through your chest and you threw the bag at him hard. He caught it but stumbled a little and he looked at you forlornly.

"Well, I guess that makes it better then, right?" You asked coldly and he flinched.

You stormed past him back to the kitchen area and he followed quickly.

"Please listen to me, Y/N. I need to make this right," he pleaded desperately. You whirled around to face him, face flushed and tear stained and you felt like you wanted to scream.

"Why? Why did you just decide after 6 months together to do this to me? You promised me, Billy! I knew this would happen but you fought for this! For us! Why?! Just so you could break my heart?!" You bellowed, a mix of anger and utter despair in your tone.

His lower lip quivered and he bit down on it, staring at the floor.

"I never wanted to hurt you. I swear, I didn't. I just…" his voice cracked as his teary eyes landed on you.

"Maybe you should just leave now," you uttered. Your whole body was trembling and you felt sick. You couldn't stand to look at him. He stepped closer to you, dropping the bag on the floor but you took a step back. It would be far too easy to fall for his bullshit again and if he touched you, you didn't think you'd be able to get him to leave.

It felt like pure pain ripped through your chest, the weight of the world crashing down around you. You slumped onto a dining chair as a raw sob clawed its way out. Billy was kneeling in front of you in seconds, his own cheeks now damp as he cupped your cheeks. You moved your head from his grip and shook your head.

"I loved you, you know that?" You whispered brokenly though your tears. You'd never outright said it, mostly in fear of his reaction. But it had all gone to shit anyway. His lip trembled again, scrunching his nose up a little as he shook his head. He looked utterly devastated and it made you angry so you continued.

"I loved you with everything I had. I trusted you with my life. I ripped out my own beating heart and willingly gave it to you because you swore to me you wouldn't do this. You just took it and stomped all over it. How could you do this to me?" Your last words were strained as the tears flowed freely.

"Please let me fix this," he begged helplessly. He was crying openly now, not trying to hide it as he gazed at you from the floor.

"You can't fix it. I'll never be able to trust you again. It's not just the sex, Billy! You've been lying to me for a month. All those business meetings or times you were away? And you just… you'd come back to me with a smile and tell me sweet words. Looked me in the fucking eye and not feel guilty," you choked out. He shook his head vigorously, hands clasping yours so tight you couldn't pull them away.

"You've got no idea how guilty I felt. It's been eatin' me up from the inside out," he lamented.

"Why would you…? What was it? You just got bored of me? Decided you didn't want me anymore? You should have just ended this because it would hurt less than this," you wept pitifully. He shook his head, clutching your hands tighter.

"Don't… Don't say that, I do want you. I know I don't deserve you, I know I'm an asshole. And… and maybe I shoulda left it alone when you told me this would happen, but I was selfish and I-I couldn't. You were never like the others. I knew that from the moment we met. But then… then things were gettin' serious and I just… I freaked out and went back to my default 'cause I didn't know how to…'' he cried, screwing his face up as he hung his head.

You sobbed as you stood, his hands falling away and you moved to lean against the table as he stood.

"It would be bad enough if I'd just got with you in the first place and you did this. But I wanted to avoid this. I tried so hard but you kept on at it. And it hurts so much more because you promised me you wouldn't do this and I believed you. I thought you'd changed, that you…" you ran a hand through your hair, tugging on it as the tears wouldn't stop.

He stepped to you, grasping your face in both hands and you couldn't bring yourself to fight it despite the pain it brought you. His endless eyes were all consuming, his cheeks wet from his own tears.

"Please… please, Y/N, don't do this. Let me make it right," he begged tearfully.

"Without trust, we have nothing. Everytime you're on your phone I'd wonder if you were talking to another woman. When you're out I'd be paranoid about who you were with. I can't live like that, Billy. I can't live my life in… in an anxious, jealous haze. That's not a relationship," you whispered.

He made a pained noise and it squeezed your heart so hard you thought it might implode.

"I was never good enough for you. I knew that. But I wanted… I wanted to try and be-be a good man… for you. And I fucked up so bad and I just…" his words trailed off into a hopeless sob and you squeezed your eyes shut. You wished there was a way to fix this but there wasn't. You wouldn't be in one of those relationships without trust. Checking your partner's phone and always checking in. It would break you.

"You need to leave, Billy," your words were a mere breath and his hands on your face tightened for a moment before they fell to his sides. He looked completely broken and you were sure you looked the same. He opened his mouth before promptly closing it, his jaw ticking as he moved away and pushed the heels of his palms to his eyes.

You wrapped your arms around yourself like it would protect you from the pain and glared at the floor. You could still feel his gaze burning into you. You glanced at him as he grabbed the bag and slung it over his shoulder. You had to fight the urge to grab onto him as he walked to your door. You felt like you were dying.

He grabbed the handle but stopped, not looking at you as his body tensed.

"I want you to know… I love you too," his pained words felt like a punch to the gut and you covered your mouth with a hand but it did little to stop the noise that left your lips. He looked over his shoulder at you, still holding the door handle.

"I know that… right now you probably don't believe me, but I do. And I'm sorry. I-I never wanted you to get hurt. You deserve so much better," he muttered despondently. With that, he opened the door and slipped out of your apartment. Of your life.

You fell to the floor as heaving sobs left your chest. It would have been easier if he came here being an asshole. Cold and emotionless like you knew he could be at times. But seeing him, his emotions so raw and on display, it cut you deeper than any knife could. And you believed him. You knew him well enough to believe that he fell in love with you and freaked out. You knew it would happen which is why you'd turned him down at the start. You believed he never wanted to hurt you. And you wished you could forgive him. You saw how much it hurt him too but you couldn't. You couldn't get over the betrayal and you didn't think you ever could.

He'd sabotaged what you both had because of his inability to deal with what he felt and the bitter knowledge that if he'd just accepted it, how different your future would be with him, it left a sour taste in your mouth. Billy had opened up to you a lot in your time together about his past and you knew how much it had messed him up. You knew it left him struggling with emotions and relationships and you felt for him. For the lost boy who'd never felt love and didn't know how to cope with it. But nothing could erase the heartbreak. The hurt that he'd given you. Because even if you'd one day be able to forgive him, you'd never be able to forget.

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #the punisher #billy russo imagine

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plaidbooks · 3 years ago

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The R Drug part 4

A/N: I’m so sorry this took so long! I got swept up in bingos and lost motivation for it along the way. But it’s here now, and I hope you all enjoy it ❤

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

Tags: alcoholism, mentions of alcohol poisoning, a lil bit of a steamy make out, but that’s it

Words: 2114

Taglist: @witches-unruly-heart @beccabarba @thatesqcrush @itsjustmyfantasyroom @permanentlydizzy @ben-c-group-therapy @infiniteoddball @glowingmess @whimsicallymad @lv7867 @storiesofsvu @cycat4077 @alwaysachorusgirl @glimmerglittergirl @joanofarkansass @caracalwithchips @beardsanddetectives @reading--mermaid @averyhotchner @mrsrafaelbarba @detective-giggles @crowleysqueenofhell @dreamlover31 @objection-argumentative

Year 1:

Sonny hardly contacts you. You go weeks with nothing from him, only to wake up at 4am with a phone call and a very drunk Sonny.

“Sonny? It’s 4am here—”

“Doll…I’m so—” you can hear how his words slur, and you can also hear that he’s crying— “so sorry, doll. I shoulda neva touched ya like that—”

“Dominick, are you drunk?”

You pinched the bridge of your nose, worried and annoyed at once. “So—sorry…so sorry…” and then he hangs up. You fell back onto the bed, concerned about him; Genoa was only six hours ahead of Manhattan. He was drunk at…10am. That wasn’t healthy.

Unable to fall back asleep, you shot him a text, making sure he was okay before you got in the shower. But he never responded. Sighing, you call his mom; you still had her number since Sonny called her from your phone, and you had been growing close with his parents.

She tells you that she’s worried he’s drinking away his problems, but every time she offers to go to Genoa, he shoots her down, telling her he needs time alone. You’re just worried that time alone means him sinking further and further into the bottle.

********************

Year 2:

You saw when your phone lit up, Sonny’s number flashing on your screen. You glanced around the precinct before answering your phone, heading for the on-call room for privacy. It had been three months since you had a drunken call from him, and you were going to lay down the law with him.

“Listen, Sonny, I can’t listen to your drunken ramblings while at work—”

“Ah, shit, ya at work, huh?” he asked, cutting you off. But he sounded lucid rather than drunk. “I’m sorry; I forgot the time difference. I just wanted ta talk, let ya know…I’m not drinkin’ anymore. Look, I’ll let ya go; text me when ya free so we can catch up…please.”

You felt bad for assuming, but with your only contact for the past year being drunk Sonny, it had become habit. “Y—yeah, I’ll see if I can leave early, okay? But don’t stay awake for me.”

“Don’t get in trouble fer me,” he replied, making you chuckle. “I’ll talk ta ya soon…and I’m sorry, fer the past year.”

*******************

You were no longer with SVU; it had been too hard working there, especially without Sonny. But you also couldn’t deal with the stares, even from your squad. So, you transferred to Homicide instead. And your boss thankfully let you leave early.

You texted Sonny the moment you were home, and instantly he was calling you.

“First, I wanna say I’m sorry fer the drunk calls—”

“Dominick Carisi Jr. If you say the phrase “I’m sorry” one more time, I’m going to fly to Genoa and smack you,” you replied, cutting him off.

He fell silent for a moment before he let out a laugh. “Yeah, I bet ya tired of hearin’ that, huh? Well…After ya left here, I—I spiraled. Hard. Turned ta the bottle, if ya couldn’t tell. But I hit the bottom, and I’m startin’ ta work my way back up.”

“What happened? What bottom did you hit?” you asked, breathless. You were happy he was telling you all this, because you had been so, so worried. But you also didn’t want to pry into his personal life or make him uncomfortable.

It took him a moment to respond. “I…it was 5am when I woke up, shakin’ fer a drink. I remember the first three shots as I made a cocktail, and then…. I woke up in a hospital bed, my stomach pumped. I guess I dropped ta the floor when I lost consciousness, and my downstairs neighbor heard it.”

“Oh my god, Sonny! Are you okay now?” you asked, wanting nothing more than to give him a hug, hold him to you.

“Yeah, I’m good now. I had my stomach pumped and part of my liver cut out, but I’m okay. I no longa have the urge ta drink, and I dumped everythin’ I had. But please, tell me what’s goin’ on with ya; how’s life at the precinct?”

You spent hours talking to Sonny that night, even though it was getting later and later for him. He had so many questions, wanting to know everything going on with you. He vaguely mentioned that he got a job at a grocery store as a cashier, but otherwise, he was focused on you.

****************

Year 3:

You and Sonny talked almost every day, falling back into your habits before all this mess happened. You joked around, sent funny pictures to each other, ranted about your days; it was almost as if nothing ever happened. Almost.

From the pictures, you could tell that he was getting tanner, and he started growing out his hair and beard, making you swoon. Not that you’d tell him that; you weren’t sure if he’d be okay with you flirting yet.

But you were happy that things were getting back to normal with you two. It had been almost 4 years since the club incident, and it barely crossed your mind anymore. You had dated since Sonny was in Genoa, but no one seemed to be working for you. At least you could make out with someone without having flashbacks, so you called it a win.

You knew why it wasn’t working out for you, though; you were in love with Sonny, had been since the moment you met him. You were able to move past the club, but you couldn’t move past him. That’s why you had hated yourself so much, and that’s why you felt terrible leaving him behind in Italy. When he kissed you outside the airport in Genoa, you had thought that maybe he had felt the same way about you. Then that first year with drunk Sonny happened, and you weren’t sure about anything anymore.

You were still close with his family, too. Ma Carisi often invited you over for dinner, and you met Sonny’s sisters. You were the emergency babysitter for both Mia (who didn’t think she needed a sitter, until she met you and had fun with you) and Bella’s little girl. And Pa Carisi enjoyed having debates about laws with you, plus the odd sports talk. Slowly, you became one of the family, and you loved them all like your own.

***************

Year 4:

Ma Carisi called you, inviting you over for dinner once again. You accepted, telling her you’d be there in thirty. You had to park on the street with all the cars there; the Carisi girls were home for dinner, as well. You smiled as you made your way up the path to the front door, then knocked. The door opened, but instead of Ma Carisi greeting you with a warm smile, it was Sonny.

“Hey doll,” he said, eyes lit up with amusement. You froze for only a moment before you were crushing him in a bear hug. You heard the huff of air as you took the air from his lungs, but you didn’t care; you had missed him so much. You had pinned his arms next to him, so he couldn’t even hug you back.

“Doll…ya crushin’ me…” he gasped, and you finally let him go. Though, you kept your hands on his arms, not believing that he was there, in front of you.

“Are you back for good?” you asked, your voice hushed. You were waiting for him to deny it, for him to say he was only visiting.

“I’m back fer good. Already got my apartment—” He was cut off again as you hugged him, burying your face in his chest. You couldn’t stop the tears that appeared, so happy to have your best friend back. He rubbed your back, murmuring that it’s all okay now, and you had the sudden urge to kiss him. You fought the urge, not wanting to complicate things.

Instead, you ran your hands over his back, then leaned away to look at him. “Have you been working out?” It was true that he was deliciously tan, his hair coifed, and his beard trimmed neatly. He was already so much more attractive than you remembered, even with the pictures he had sent.

He barked out a laugh, a gleam in his eye. “I have, yeah. Whenever I felt the urge ta drink, I instead went to work out. I’m not a body builder or anythin’, though.”

“I’m proud of you, Sonny,” you said, and you meant it. You had gone through hell after the club incident, but Sonny didn’t have a walk in the park either. And you were glad he had found himself.

A pink tint appeared on his cheeks as he smiled at you. He took your hand, kissed your knuckles, and you swooned.

******************

After the surprise greeting at the front door, he brought you into the house. Ma Carisi and all his sisters gave you a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek, and Pa Carisi patted your shoulder; the normal greeting from the family. But now that Sonny was there, too, the energy was truly alive. Everyone was smiling and laughing, having a fantastic time together. The talk was loud, happy, and energized. It was almost as if Sonny hadn’t been hiding in Genoa for four years.

After the talk had finally died down, it was time for you to go home. Sonny offered to walk you to your car, and you agreed, not wanting to leave him quite yet.

“I’m so glad you came back, Sonny. I’ve missed you,” you said as you stood by your driver’s side door.

He grinned at you. “A promise is a promise. I told ya I’d come back once I was…better.”

“And are you better? Did you date at all in Genoa?”

His smile faded, and you worried you offended him. You were about to apologize when he spoke. “I am and I did. But no one there was…it fer me, ya know?”

“Yeah…same thing here. I dated a few people, but no one felt right—the spark wasn’t there. At least I had no flashbacks; I hardly remember that night anymore, to be honest,” you said, looking into his eyes, trying to gauge his reaction.

Sonny simply nodded. “Me either, really. It was so long ago…plus, I bet the drinkin’ didn’t help. But I do remember you, showin’ up outta nowhere on a random street in Genoa. Talkin’ me through the worst time of my life.”

“And I remember you, comforting me during a thunderstorm when you didn’t have to do that. Your emotions were everywhere; I couldn’t imagine the turmoil I must’ve put you through—”

“No, no, look at me,” he muttered, his warm hand cupping your cheek. “No matter what happens—in the past or the future—I wanna take care of ya, make sure you’re okay. Comfortin’ ya, it was a slice of normalcy after I thought I’d neva have that again. I needed ya there, and I’m so thankful I had ya.”

You smiled up at him, melting into his touch. His thumb stroked your cheekbone, and you felt closer to him than ever before. “You know what else I remember, Sonny?”

“Hm?”

Slowly, you leaned forward, going slow enough that he had plenty of time to pull away. But instead, he also leaned in until your lips brushed against each other. You smiled softly before you pressed your lips more firmly to his. The hand still cupping your cheek tilted you slightly, letting him kiss you a little more forcefully, his beard tickling you as he moved.

There was the spark that was missing from all your past relationships; you had felt it in the airport, but it wasn’t the right time. Now, however, there was nothing holding you back from deepening the kiss, your tongues coming together in a beautiful dance.

Sonny gently pushed you back against your car, the kiss getting more heated. Your hands went to his shaggy, luscious hair, tugging softly and making him moan into your mouth. His hands dropped to your hips, pushing you back against the car as his tongue memorized your mouth.

Reluctantly, he pulled away from you, both of you panting hard. You were about to suggest he show you his new apartment when he muttered, “I wanna take this slow. Please.”

You shut your mouth, nodding. You’d do anything to make him comfortable and happy. “I can do slow. As long as I have you, Sonny.”

His eyes brightened and he gave you his signature goofy smile. “Ya have me fer as long as ya want me.”

#sonny carisi x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfic #fanfic #my writing

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tloujm · 3 years ago

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Part XXVI: Giving Grief

Author’s Notes: This is the first chapter I’ve posted in months (literally since April). I don’t know if this is a full comeback. I have a few chapters in the drafts that need to be edited and formatted for posting but after that, I still plan on continuing the series bc my plan was always have a long fic. With no new content after part II of the game was released, my interest in the fandom waned but was always there. Now with HBO creating a show based off the game, as well as me being apart of the Pedro Pascal fandom, I think I will soon become more consistent in posting as new content gets released. I will say that at least half of what appeals to me for Joel is Troy Baker’s voice and while I love Pedro’s voice too, I know it won’t be the same. I still think Pedro will do the voice justice bc he can do a damn fine country accent as seen in the movie Prospect on Netflix. If you’re a fan of his and have Netflix, please go watch it!

Genre: Angst and Fluff

Summary: You and Joel reconcile and bond over Ellie and Sarah.

Ship: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Joel waited for you to come home. He paced back and forth in the kitchen switching from holding the card and setting it down on the counter. He was eager to talk to you about this new revelation partly because he was nervous to have the other conversation with you. After a while of calming his nerves down, you still hadn’t come home. The sun had set an hour ago and Joel was ready to throw on his boots and go looking for you.

Just as he laced them up, the front door opened. You walked in and immediately stopped because his body blocked you from walking in the house further.

“Going somewhere?” You asked as you slid past him. He was a grown man and could do what he wanted, but the thought of him leaving to go do other things before the issue between you was resolved upset you.

He reached back down to unlace his boots. “Not anymore. I was ‘bout to head out and find you.”

“Why?” You asked dryly.

“I’d been waiting on you to come home for a couple of hours. We gotta talk.”

“You’re right, we do. I was helping Wendy walk the kids home from the daycare; that’s what held me up. I’m here now, though.” You leaned against the back of the couch and crossed your arms. The stance you took reminded you of what Joel would do.

He walked into the kitchen and came back. “Kiddo made this for us.”

You took it in your hands. “When did she have time to make this?” He shrugged. Your fingers brushed across the drawing of the hat before finally opening it. “Oh my God.” She looked at you for a split second before looking back down at her signature. “Her name has been ‘Ellie’ the whole time.”

“I know.” He commented.

“She never said anything. All of us have asked her.”

“Technically, she still hasn’t spoken her name, but I guess she wasn’t ready for that.”

“She wasn’t ready to let anybody in.” You said. He nodded in agreement.

“Until now.” He walked up to you and pointed to her name on the card. “She’s doing so good, this Ellie. I can only try to imagine the horrors that she’s seen out in the world before she came to Jackson, but whatever happened out there, it led her to us. I’m...It’s just nice to see her opening up to this place.”

You understood what he was trying to say. “Yeah, I’m proud of her too.” You walked past him and into the kitchen to hang the card on the refrigerator. Joel followed. This time, his arms were crossed.

“(Y/N), I meant it when I said I was sorry back there. I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

“If you didn’t mean it, you wouldn’t have said it.” You rebutted.

“I was upset with you because I expected you to react the same as me when Ellie climbed up that T-Rex, but I don’t want a carbon copy of myself. I love you and want to have a family with you because you are wise beyond your years, confident even if you don’t always think so, responsible even for things that aren’t your responsibility and most importantly, you’re level headedness. Where I have a tendency to lose my cool in certain situations, you are guided by this calm...patient sense of will that I envy.” He took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, giving you the opportunity to say something. Seeing that you were still soaking in his words, he continued. “You’ll be a great mother. I saw it in the gentle way you juggled all those kids at the daycare. I saw it in the way you took care of Ellie the first day she came here. You’ll see though, if it’s meant for us to have a baby, how difficult it is to stop worrying. It didn’t stop when Sarah....even when I tried to push those feelings away. It doesn’t stop. I know she’s not her, but it’s hard for me to just stand by and watch her do something that could hurt her.”

“I wasn’t standing by, or at least that wasn’t my intention. I wanted to give her space. She’s so delicate, or maybe that’s my problem. I shouldn’t treat her like she’s some glass figurine. I just wanted her to grow comfortable with us by trusting her. Believe me, it wasn’t easy for me to do when there was nothing personally for me to go off of, but then I thought, she’s lived out there for God knows how long by herself. She’s not only seen things but has been able to survive things. It’s hard to see how clever someone is when they won’t let you in, but I knew she had to be to have made it this far. I get it though. I’ve never been a parent. I can only sympathize with your worries. I can not empathize with you until I’ve been where you have. I’m sorry too. I could have found a way to give her space without allowing her to be in such a dangerous spot. You must be disappointed in me.”

He moved up to you and placed his hands on your shoulder. “I’m not. Look at me. I’m not disappointed in you. She was both of our responsibilities earlier.” He brought you into a tight hug. “You’re right, she is smart. She felt comfortable enough to show a side of herself that no one else has seen. You know why? ‘Cause she felt safe around us. Despite the grief she put me through, it was nice to see her so happy.”

“I know it was, wasn’t it? I can’t believe she jumped though! I didn’t think she’d go that far.”

“At the end of the day, kids will be kids. It’s not an excuse to slack off on raising ‘em, but there's just a certain wild and carefree nature that every kid has. It’s instilled in their DNA or somethin’ and then it fades away as they get older, about the time their back starts to ache.” Joel chuckled as he explained. He kissed the top of your head before pulling away to get a good look at you. He made a face as if to ask if you were ok. You nodded. He took your hand and pulled you into the living room. You sat down next to him. “She reminds me of Sarah sometimes. Ellie’s about the same age as her. She ran me through the ringer, raising that one.” He chuckled at the memories. “I wouldn’t trade it in for the world, being her dad, but you shoulda seen the amount of grief she put me through. Especially being a single parent.” He wiped his hand across his face, letting it linger along the length of his neck. “One time, she snuck off to some skate park when I told her no. She was in this skateboarding phase. I bought her a customized skateboard for her birthday and she would practice using it up and down the driveway. She had barely learned that little flippy trick when she asked me to take her to the skate park. I told her no because it looked like it was for experienced skaters. I wanted her to practice more first. To say the least, she was mad at me. She told me she was staying after school for the science club, but she really went to the skate park with some friends. By the time I figured out where she was, I found her lying in the grass, holding her arm in pain. Turned out she had a hairline fracture in her...radius?” He pointed to the bone on his arm. You nodded that it was in fact called radius. “I grounded her for lying to me, but sometimes I wonder if I should have taken her to the park. I mean I’m no expert on skateboarding, but at least I could have been there to supervise; make sure she wasn’t on one of those tough looking ramps.”

“Did you ever take her skateboarding after she healed up?”

“After the cast came off, she switched interests to soccer. I installed a shelf on one of her walls to hang the skateboard on. Better that than being stuffed under her bed. Soccer was her life though. She made new friends from the team, won titles, learned tricks with the ball. Me and Tommy were regulars at her games. I was...am proud of her.”

You smiled as you envisioned his memories. “Did she give you grief with that as well?”

He nodded in an exaggerated way. “Oh yeah, but I’m sure I used to give her grief too.” You lifted your eyebrows with desire for him to elaborate. “I may or may not have argued with the coach and ref on a few occasions regarding plays.”

“You never dated any of the soccer moms?” You teased.

He scoffed. “Most of them were married and the ones who weren’t, I sent Tommy’s way instead. He wasn’t mad at it.” The two of you chuckled. “I did flirt with a few, married or not, so I could get my hands on some of their homemade baked goods.”

“I was under the assumption that soccer moms made food for everyone.”

“They did, but I still wanted a few more cupcakes for the ride home.” He admitted as you laughed. “Listen, I had a busy life. I didn’t have much time to hone my baking skills, so it was nice to be able to have homemade cakes and cookies for a change.

“Well, if you wanted cookies, that’s all you had to say! I can show you how to bake right now.”

“It’s late.” He reasoned.

“It’s never too late to feed your sweet tooth.” You rebutted as you pulled him back into the kitchen.

#TLOU #TLOU2 #TLOUII #the last of us #the last of us joel #the last of us fanfic #The Last of Us 2 #the last of us fanfiction #tlou ellie #tlou joel #tlou fanfiction #tlou oc #naughty dog #Joel Miller #joel x reader #joel miller fanfic #Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

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mammonshuman92 · 4 years ago

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- Watched - Pt.3

(Mammon x GN!MC)

**TW: cussing, stalking, kidnapping, religion,

Note: C/N (coworker name)

“Man, I’m starvin’. What’s takin’ so long anyway?” He grumbled, remembering the whole ‘first name basis’ thing with the delivery driver.

He was laid on his back across your bed scrolling through social media, impatiently waiting for you to return. His stomach started to growl.

“Maybe I should go check? But, MC said to stay here so no one could see me.” He said to himself, a slight pout on his lips.

He heard a small shuffling noise come from the living room, it sounded like a paper bag crinkling.

Ok, ya got the food, now don’t be tryin’ to chit chat MC, I know how ya are. I’m dyin’ in here!

The bedroom was a straight shot down the hall from the door, making it impossible to sneak a quick peek without fully exposing himself.

He could hear you talking back and forth with...Alex. He huffed to himself remembering your chumminess with the take out guy. Something just seemed weird to him about the whole thing.

Somethin’ is fishy about him always havin’ MC’s route or whatever. Does nobody else deliver for that place? I bet he’s got a crush on MC or somethin’.

“I’ll kick his ass.” He said out loud, his own thoughts making him sour.

He listened again, trying to hear what was being said. He couldn’t hear any actual words, but he could hear Alex’s voice. Barely, though.

Wait a minute.. Is he whisperin’? What’s he gotta say to MC that requires whisperin’?! I gotta get outta here.

Mammon was getting himself worked up, assuming this delivery guy was confessing his love to you. He’d nearly convinced himself to march out there and confront the creep. To hell with staying hidden!

Before he could blow his cover, he heard something hit the front door followed by more shuffling movement. He calmed down a bit, thinking the noises he heard were of you getting the food inside and trying to kick the door shut.

He impatiently waited for you to call out, telling him the coast was clear and that he could finally come eat. But, you didn’t.

After a couple minutes passed with no new noise, he grew slightly anxious.

He stood up and started pacing beside the bed, feeling antsy.

C’mon, MC. What’re ya doin’? I’m witherin’ away! Before long I’m gonna shrink up and turn into a Little D or somethin’..

Suddenly, he heard voices again. Well, just the delivery guy’s voice, still a hushed tone. He groaned to himself.

“If he don’t hurry up and go away, I’m gonna eat him instead.” He grumbled quietly to himself.

Something didn’t feel right though. Why was Alex’s voice the only one he heard? It had been at least five minutes since he heard you say something. It’s not like he just missed what you said because you were too quiet for him to hear, or you just chose not to contribute to the guy’s conversation.

You always talk, to basically anyone you come in contact with, never really knowing a stranger. He’s pretty sure you haven’t gone five minutes without talking since he met you. That’s why it seemed so weird to him.

That alone wasn’t really enough to expose himself though, was it?

To say you’ve been through a lot lately is an understatement. You’re sleep deprived and your nerves are shot. With everything that’s been going on, it would be more weird if you didn’t act a little different. He didn’t blame you for not being your usual self.

He still couldn’t shake this feeling though.

A sudden, loud noise outside got his attention.

Was that a car door?

He moved quickly, putting his back against the wall, scooting over to the doorway.

“MC? Is he gone?” He whispered.

No answer.

Screw it.

Very slowly, he peeked his head around the corner, careful not to be seen.

“MC?” He whispered again, louder this time.

Still nothing.

Somethin’ is definitely wrong..

He fully emerged in the doorway, eyes darting around, taking in his surroundings. As he quickly made his way up the hall, he noticed the door standing wide open. He could see that an older model car was parked in front of the house and you were no where in sight.

Hand still on the door knob, he turned around to call out into the house, “MC, where ya at? Ya know ya left the door-”

Before he could finish, the car outside suddenly accelerated, kicking up dirt and rocks as they sped off.

What the..?

“Guess he didn’t like his tip..?” He whispered to himself.

He shut the door and turned around slowly, only taking a couple steps before he came to a stop. He couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling he had.

“Oi, MC! D-don’t ya know you’re supposed to answer when THE Great Mammon calls for ya?” He waited, but the house was still. All he could hear was his heartbeat in his ears.

He walked further into the house, quickly looking around the kitchen before heading back down the hall.

Why ain’t they answerin’.. c-could it..? Nah..

“This ain’t funny ya know..” He called through the house, hoping that you’d somehow slipped past him.

Again, he was met with bone chilling silence.

Slowly, he started piecing all the little weird things that didn’t make sense together like a puzzle. The silent house and wide open door, abandoned food, the car speeding away..

The same delivery guy somehow always having this route...

His heart sank.

No, no, no, no!

He ran from room to room in a panic, desperately calling out to you, begging you to answer him.

This ain’t happenin’.. They gotta be hidin’ or something. Yeah, that’s it!

“MC! Where are ya? Talk to me, please!” He screamed, voice breaking around the hard lump forming in his throat, tears beginning to prick at his eyes.

No, it can’t be.. It can’t be..

With trembling hands, he dug his phone from his pocket, quickly dialing your number.

“C’mon, pick up. Please, please pick up.” He pleaded as he paced the floor.

His stomach dropped when he heard it ringing within the house, quickly following the sound until he found it on the coffee table where you had left it earlier. He stood there unmoving, staring at his picture and contact name with hearts on the screen, tears streaking down his face.

The weight of it all came crashing down like a tsunami, forcing him to his knees. With his face in his hands, he sobbed uncontrollably.

I shoulda listened to my gut when I thought somethin’ was wrong! Why did I wait so long to look for ‘em?! He took MC, he took MC! Dammit!

How did he let this happen? He was right here, right here, and he didn’t sense the danger. He couldn't protect you again, letting you fall right into the hands of the psycho creep who had been relentlessly harassing you, who was planning to do who knows what.

He had to do something. Anything.

Get the hell up! Ya gotta go find MC NOW! There’s no tellin’ what this creep is gonna try.

He stood up and wiped his face, trying to compose himself as he switched into demon form.

“I can still catch ‘em!” He made a beeline for the door, stopping abruptly as he reached the thresh hold.

“Wait, it’s the middle of the day and this ain’t the Devildom. A demon flyin’ around on a man hunt would be real bad.” He thought aloud.

People would most likely panic and if history proves anything, nothing good ever comes from humans when they panic.

He had to try and think rationally, as hard as it was. He wanted to rush in and save you as quick as he could, but going in blind without a decent plan could get you hurt...or possibly worse.

He switched out of demon form and moved back into the living room, trying to come up with an idea.

Your phone was here so he couldn’t have you tracked by GPS and he didn’t remember much about the car except that it was older. He didn’t even know what the guy looked like since he’d had to hide. All he knew about him was his first name and that he worked at a restaurant.

“The take out place would for sure have everything about him on file!” He quickly punched in the name of the place into his phone’s search engine, then suddenly paused.

“Wait a minute..I can’t just waltz in there and ask for someone’s personal info. They’d call the cops or somethin’. Damn!”

He was beginning to feel hysterical. He didn’t have much to go on and every idea he came up with was crap. A few ‘ding’ sounds from the coffee table tore him from his thoughts. It was your phone.

Someone named C/N had sent you a couple texts about work and judging by the text log, you talked to them often.

“Man, I hope this C/N knows somethin’ cause I’ve got nothin’ else to go on..”

Luckily, he remembered the name of the coffee shop, having heard you talk about work often. A quick internet search and he had the directions. He was out the door like a shot.

With his newfound breadcrumb, he was one step closer to finding you.

A bell chimed above the door when he entered the shop, alerting the worker behind the counter of his presence.

“Hi, how can I help you?” They greeted him as he walked up to the counter.

“Hey, is there a C/N here by any chance?”

“Oh, uh, yeah just a sec.” They went through a doorway behind the counter, returning moments later with another person in tow.

“Hello..? I’m sorry, do I know you?” They asked, approaching Mammon, visibly confused.

“No, but you know MC, right?” He asked, uninterested in beating around the bush.

“I’m not sure I can answer that.” They said cautiously, visibly tense.

They do know somethin’.

“Here, look.” He said, pulling up the gallery on his phone, showing them multiple pictures of you and MC together.

“Oh, so you’re the boyfriend. MC has told me about you. Uh, anyway, is there something I can help you with? I need to get back to work..”

“Yeah, has MC ever mentioned anythin’ about a guy named Alex before?” He asked.

Please, please, please

“Alex..Alex..” They repeated, tapping a finger on their chin as they thought it over. “They did, actually. We went to the movies about two months ago, and ran into a guy they knew. It was their usual deliver guy I think? Said his name was Alex. He gave me the creeps.” They explained.

“Why is that?”

Yes! We’re gettin’ somewhere.

“He just seemed..I don’t know, off? And when I met him, I actually remembered seeing him a few days earlier on my way to work. There was another A.T.A. protest and I saw him in the group demonstrators. He denied being there when I brought it up, saying it had to be his doppelganger or something, but I know it was him. When we ran into him at the movies he said he had just got off work, and he was wearing the exact same shirt and hat as the day of the protest.” They informed him.

“Wait, A.T.A.? What’s that?” He asked curiously.

“Anti-Treaty Association. They’re exactly what the name suggests. Everyone involved in the exchange program is public knowledge. Names, pictures, updates on how the program was going, etc. All easily found on any search engine. If he is part of the A.T.A., why would he be friendly with MC? There’s no way he didn’t know who they were.” They said.

This Alex guy is definitely the stalker. I bet if I dig into this A.T.A. I can find him..

“Alright. Thanks for your help.” He said as he turned to leave, C/N took a few steps after him.

“Hey, uh, is MC okay? I know they haven’t been themselves lately, but uh, you coming here and asking all these questions kinda scares me..” They admitted, fear for their friend written on their face.

“MC is uh, goin’ through some stuff. I’m gonna put an end to it though.” His voice was rough, angry. His face however, was full of desperation and sadness.

Mammon thanked C/N again for their information and left the coffee shop on a new mission. He uncovered another piece of the puzzle, new information that could lead him to you.

No one knew exactly what this guy was capable of, but he had the most important piece of Mammon's existence with him. There wasn’t anything he wasn’t willing to do, in any realm, to bring you back safely. He would breach the Celestial Gates without thinking twice if it would bring you back to him.

He was going to show them exactly why he's the second strongest of the seven rulers of the underworld.

I’m comin’ MC. I will find ya, I promise.

“Get out.”

The scorching heat inside the trunk made you nauseous, and severely thirsty. You felt weak and disoriented, unable to move much. You weren’t sure how long you had been stuck in there before you finally felt the car come to a stop. The lid opened, blazing sunshine poured inside the dark space, making your eyes water and squint reflexively.

“I said, get out!” He screamed.

He wrapped his hand around your wrist hard and yanked you from the trunk, letting you drop to the ground. You were much to weak to try and brace yourself so you fell pretty hard, getting small scrapes and dirt on your elbows and forearms.

You tried to open your eyes to try and get an idea of where he had taken you, but before they could adjust to the blinding sunlight, he tied something around your eyes.

“Can’t have you trying to escape.” He said to himself, as he finished tying up your hands. The restraints were very tight, already starting to hurt your wrists.

“I’m not going to.” You said weakly, your words making him laugh.

“Well, at least your a smart demon slut. Somewhat, anyway.”

Honestly, you weren’t planning to escape. If the opportunity presented itself, you would make a run for it, but you weren’t actively looking for an escape route. However, you had no intention of giving this creep what he wanted, or giving up without one hell of a fight.

Pulling you by the restraint around your wrists, he began to drag you across the ground. He let go of you a minute or so later. He didn’t drag you very far, ending up in some kind of building judging by the change in temperature and the rough feeling of concrete beneath you. It felt a little cooler in here as if you were out of direct sunlight, but the air was still fairly hot and sticky.

You did your best to pay attention to the things around you. The sounds, smells, what little you could feel. Outside you could hear cows in the distance and some kind of humming noise. It was definitely hot, but more like that humid feeling before it storms. You could also smell it too, the incoming rain. That warm earthy smell.

You could hear Alex nearby messing with something metal, there was also the sound of running water somewhere close.

I can’t believe Alex was actually the stalker this entire time... Explains how pictures taken of me from outside my house though.. I wonder what he plans to do..

You promptly chased away those thoughts in order to keep yourself calm, replacing them with thoughts of him, the time you’d spent together along with all the memories that came with it.

How soft and fluffy his hair felt when ran your fingers through it. The way he smelled; not the Devilish No.5, although you did love it, it’s smell closely related to the famous human world version, but his smell. Crisp and clean like fresh laundry or new clothes, slightly smoky like leather because of his favorite jacket and small undertones of warm cinnamon and vanilla.

The always groaned about your selection for movie night but was the first one to get really into it. Having a concert while cooking when you had kitchen duty together, getting in trouble for talking and laughing in class and later being scolded by Lucifer for it. How he always used to complain how bad humans smell, only to find out he started buying your brand of body wash for himself and would also try to casually smell his hoodie after you’d worn it.

The thought of never seeing him again, never experiencing anymore memories like these or the chance to make new ones, kept haunting you. A hard lump was forming in your throat, tears beginning to prick your eyes.

“Aw, what’s the matter darlin’? The abomination you chose as a lover isn’t rushing in to save you like Prince Charming? Imagine that.” He spat.

You ignored his sarcastic comments, wanting answers of you own, “Why are you doing this?” You could hear him walking toward you, his footsteps getting louder as he approached. The sound stopped abruptly, then he crouched down next to your head.

“I told you, you need to be cleansed.” His tone was very matter-of-fact.

He grabbed your wrist restraint again and drug you another ten feet or so. Easily picking you up and hoisting you into the air until the rope around your wrists caught on something. He let go, your full weight coming down on your restraint. You were suspended in the air, feet barely skimming the floor.

He checked your ropes to make sure it was still secure with the added weight and gravity, then he removed your blindfold. The sudden change causing you to blink several times.

Your previous assumptions had been right, you appeared to be in a warehouse that had been abandoned for quite some time. Most of the windows were broken, big vines and other foliage creeping into the building. The rusted remnants of machinery scattered around the large, open room. You looked above you to see that you were hanging from a large hook that was suspended by thick chain from a metal beam up above. Far to your left you could see what looked like a large pool or even one of those big basins you usually use to water cattle, with a hose draped over the side. There’s the source of the running water you heard.

Wait...a stock tank with water, ’cleansed’...is he going to..baptize me?

“Cleansed? That’s been mentioned quite a bit in the dozens of letters I’ve been getting. Well, you would know, huh? Since you’re the one behind it all. What I don’t understand is why?”

It came off as more sarcastic than you intended, but you didn’t really care. You had been terrified for weeks about the stalker. What would they do when they finally got to you? You haven’t truly felt alone in over a month, as if someone was always hiding in the shadows watching, waiting. Your anxiety has been through the roof and you’re in a nearly constant state of paranoia and fear.

But, now that he was in front of you, you didn’t feel scared. You wanted answers.

“Because they don’t belong with our kind. Uniting our realms is blasphemy and will throw the human world into chaos.”

‘Don’t belong with our kind’..? Whoa, what the hell..

“Blasphemy? But, the Celestial Realm is on board with it. The angels in the exchange progr-” He cut you off before you could finish, his sudden booming voice echoed through the spacious warehouse, startling you.

He stood with his back to you, facing a long metal table that looked as if it used to be a conveyor or some other piece that once belonged to one of the old machines inside the long forgotten building.

“The exchange program was a joke! Those devils just needed a good cover to get their claws on our realm so they could take it over! Using their dirty tricks and magic to bring corruption and pollute us with sin.” He stared you down like a mad man while he yelled.

This was so bizarre, he sounded insane. Like, one of those people that wore tin foil hats. This version of Alex, the real one, was scary. You would’ve never guessed in a million years that this guy was the same one that you talked about the weather and current events with a few times a week.

“None of that is even remotely true! They just want to bring peace among the realms, to prove that they are not what all the harmful, hateful rhetoric claims they are. So we can all just co-exist! That was the entire point of the exchange program! To learn about the Devildom; it’s people and culture.” You fought back.

His face twisted up in disgust, visibly becoming more and more agitated every time you spoke. He stalked closer, stopping maybe six feet in front of you, staring at you intently.

“That kind of thinking is exactly why you need to be cleansed. You’re a human, or has being a demon whore and becoming the embodiment of sin made you forget that? You are nothing but a weak, powerless human to them. A pawn in their bigger plan, collateral damage if things went wrong.”

You never cared what assumptions people made or the rumors they started regarding your stay in the Devildom. However, when the very demons you loved and cared about became the subject of people’s whispering, you were willing to fight with no intentions of backing down.

You, out of everyone, who had to live in the House of Lamentation for a year, escaped death from a couple of the brothers, helped them mend familial bonds, and held pacts with all of them, should know better than anyone, exactly who they are.

“You don’t know anything about them!” You yelled lurching forward as you filled with anger, lightly swinging back and forth where you were suspended, the thick chains above you clanking, “The things they’ve been through, they things they’ve seen. The sacrifices they had to make..” You heart ached for them. What happened during the Great Celestial War, their fall.. They’ve been through a great deal and they, along with the rest of the Devildom, are undeserving of such prejudiced hatred.

“Being demons doesn’t automatically mean they are bad people, just like being human doesn’t make you good.” You stared him down, lacing venom in your words. He squinted his eyes at you, unhappy with your implications. “That fact was thoroughly proven during my time there. Some of kindest people I have ever met, as well as the people I love and cherish the most, are demons.”

You would forever stand behind the program, your now second home, and all the friends and loved ones you made along the way. No matter what this psycho could come up with, you would not be swayed. You knew them for who they are, all Alex knew was hatred.

He scoffed at your words, walking toward you as he shook his head in disgust, eyes boring into yours. He stopped just inches in front of your face. You held onto your resolve, staring back at him intently, not letting him see that you were completely terrified. It’s what he wanted; to feel superior and pass judgement on those he deemed unworthy.

You weren’t going to give him the satisfaction though; to feed his ego, his delusions. You refused to bow to fear, instead giving it all you had to make sure that if this was how it would end for you, you would fight against his prejudice and hatred until your final moments.

“We will start with the normal cleansing.” He backed away from you, confirming your suspicions as he gestured to the stock tank. “Although I think your soul might be too far gone for it to be completely effective.” He smiled wickedly as he turned around, going back to the table he’d been at earlier and picked up the same knife he’d held to you when he kidnapped you. The only other weapons you could see on the table were a baton and a taser. There was also a thick book you could only assume was a bible and a large jar of water. The most concerning however, was the gas can, thick work gloves, and what looked a lot like a body bag.

“This may call for a more extensive purification.”

PART FOUR COMING SOON!

#obey me!#obey me fanfic #obey me mammon #mammon x mc #trigger warning #potentially triggering #obey me shall we date #obey me angst

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jadedxrealityw · 4 years ago

Text

-You Broke Me First- Draco Malfoy x Female Reader

A/N: This image is based around the song You broke me first by Tate Mcrae this image with have two endings: angst and fluff

Summary: Draco cheated on you months ago with another Slytherin and you broke it off without second thought (as you should) but Draco wants you back

Warning: cheater Draco, yelling, cursing maybe?

House: Hufflepuff

♡~🐍~♡

It had been months since you last spoke to Draco Malfoy. He used to be the person you loved and thought loved you too. You were surprised that he gave you the time of day, but with some chatting and a bit of flirting you fell for him hard. The day he asked you out would forever be a cherished memory. You were sitting alone on the courtyard when he came up to you with white roses. You’d never forget the nervous look he had until you said yes.

Being official was the best part. He would show everyone your his with sweet kisses or a arm around you. No guy dared to get close to you and you kinda liked not having guys flirt with you anymore. On one of your anniversaries he bought you a necklace. It was a simple silver chain with a beautiful emerald in the middle. It was small and shaped like a teardrop. It had you and Draco’s name on the back of it. You adored it, you still adore it.

When seventh year rolled around Draco started to become distant, push himself away from you or shut you out, leaving you confused and hurt. He wouldn’t sit or talk to you. At one point you thought it was something you had done, but it wasn’t it was never your fault. It was a late night and Blaise invited you too a Slytherin party, Draco wouldn’t give you the time of day anymore.

Blaise told you that it was Draco who wanted you to come, it made your heart flutter in hope that he still cared about you. When you showed up Draco was nowhere to be found. Thats until a girl came out of one of the boys dorms screaming about how she claimed the Slytherin prince. She had hickeys scattered across her neck and was fixing her shirt, your heart dropped as soon as you saw your boyfriend walking out behind her, with his black button up undone and messy hair.

As soon as your eyes met he looked saddened, but looked away right after. Had your meant nothing to him anymore? Tears blurred your vision as you ran off. Blaise calling your name behind you, but you didn’t look back. There was nothing to look back to.

♡~🐍~♡

A week later Blaise had apologized for Draco’s actions and said he’d always be there for you if you needed it. You told him thanks, but he rarely ever talked to you after that either. You didn’t blame him. You wanted to be alone anyway. Draco made no attempt to speak to you. One day, you had gathered his things that he had left at your dorm room in a box. It contained his quidditch jumper, the notes he wrote you during class that you had kept and one of his many silver rings. He would put one on you and say one day you would be Mrs. Malfoy. What a cruel joke.

You walked over to the Slytherin table during breakfast one morning and tapped Blaise’s shoulder he turned to look at you and gave you a smile. He took in the bags under your eyes, that were also puffy and red due to lack of sleep and crying. You gave him a half smile and handed him the box. After that you got up and left the great hall entirely.

♡~🐍~♡

Back to the present. It would have been your fifth anniversary today, why you still kept count? You didn’t know, but it was stupid. Hogwarts was destroyed after the wizard war and it took awhile for it to be put back together, but it happened. You went back to Hogwarts for your 8th year. You were in the program for students who wanted to retake &th year because of the war. You made friends with Hermione, she was pretty sweet.

One day you were walking around the halls when you bumped into someone “Im so sorry i didn’t-” your words were cut off when you came face to face with the man who broke your heart, with the man you were still unfortunately in love with. Draco Malfoy, why did he have to be the one you ran into on your what would have been anniversary “Malfoy, i’m sorry for bumping into you” you said politely before continuing to walk.

“I’m sorry” you heard him shout from behind you making you stop in your tracks “I’m sorry for not being there when you needed me, i’m sorry that i cheated on you, it breaks me to this day and i’d do anything to fix it” your jaw clenched. He was broken? he had no fucking right to say that. You spun on your heels and walked right up to him

“You broke me first, Malfoy” she seethed in anger. He looked shocked. You had never once raised your voice at him and he had never seen you anger. You were kind and sweet. Your were his little Hufflepuff girlfriend. You were his everything. You were enraged, your E/C eyes bore into him. He looked around before grabbing your hand. He pulled you both into a empty classroom.

‘Maybe you don't like talking too much about yourself’

You didn’t care, you needed all this anger out and he was going to listen and shut up “Y/N listen. I didn’t tell you a lot of things when we were dating, but i want to now” he said and stepped closer to you, but you just backed away “But you shoulda told me that you were thinkin' 'bout someone else” your voice cracked slightly. You were going to be a bit emotional about this and you had every reason to be. Draco felt a pang in his chest as you spoke to him. THe hurt coming off of your voice was enough to make him cry.

‘You're drunk at a party or maybe it's just that your car broke down Your phone's been off for a couple months, so you're calling me now’

“Y/N i’m so sorry. Just let me explain so we can fix this. I want you back in my life. You were supposed to be Mrs. Malfoy remember?” he pleaded and went to grab your hand, but you pulled it away. He couldn’t just say sorry and everything would be okay. That’s not how this works. You turned your head away from him “I know you, you're like this. When shit don't go your way you needed me to fix it. And like me, I did. But I ran out of every reason”

Draco listened to you speak, a lump forming in his throat. “Now suddenly you're asking for it back?!” you exclaimed and pushed him away. He stumbled back a bit “Could you tell me, where'd you get the nerve?” and pushed him again. Tears ran down your face “Yeah, you could say you miss all that we had. But I don't really care how bad it hurts. When you broke me first” you choked out and pushed him one last time.

‘You broke me first’

You were in a full mania and back away, you laughed and wiped your tears from your face with the back of your hand roughly. You sat on top of a desk “Took a while, was in denial when I first heard, That you moved on quicker than I could've ever, you know that hurt” she swung her legs as she spoke remembering two weeks after you broke up he went out with Pansy Parkinson, you heard they broke up after his dad was sent to Azkaban.

“Swear for a while I would stare at my phone necklace just to see your name. But now that it's there, I don't really know what to say” you shrugged half heartedly as your hand fiddles with the necklace he gave around your neck, you never took it off, you just couldn’t. Draco looked at the necklace remembering when he bought it for you. It was a happy memory for him

(the rest of the song isn’t needed so bleh)

♡~🐍~♡

Angst Ending:

You got off the desk and looked one last time at Draco who had tear tracks down his face, you reached behind your neck and unclipped the necklace. You dropped it into your palm and sighed. You finally had closure and got to say what you had wanted to. You walked up to him and grabbed his hand. He looked hopeful for a second before you placed the necklace into his hand and closed it.

“Please don’t do this” he whispered, more tears falling down. You shook your head and looked away, letting go of his hand “Goodbye Draco Malfoy, i wish you the best” you spoke politely, which broke his heart. You pushed open the classroom door and walked out. You walked down the hallway a heavy feeling being lifted off your chest.

After that you felt free and happy without Draco, he still gave you sad glances sometimes, but with Hermione by your side she helped you with it and soon Draco Malfoy was a faded memory and you were stronger than ever.

♡~🐍~♡

Happy Ending:

Draco walked over to you and you turned your gaze away quickly. He leaned in and you tried your hardest to not to look “My father forced me to become a death eater” he said making you gasp. He rolled up his sleeve to show you his dark mark and you covered your mouth with your hand. “He told me that people around me would be my weakness and darling. You are my weakness, because your the person i love the most”

You felt your heartbeat quicken. He still had that effect on you “I needed to get you to leave me, but i couldn’t break up with you. You would know i was lying. You always know when im lying” he laughed quietly “So i invited you to that party so you could see. Paid some girl to pretend to have slept with me. I’ll never forget the look on your face when you saw me” He looked away as you processed the information.

“What about that hickeys?” you asked, like it was the important part in that sentence, which it wasn’t “Blaise” “Blaise knew about this to?” Draco nods “He was a death eater to, after you left i was to be engaged to Pansy” he groaned. He never really liked Pansy, she was too clingy for him. “When my father was sent away i broke it off and came back here to find you” he spoke softly as he cupped your face with one of his hands “Your the only person i would ever want to be Mrs. Malfoy” he smiles.

You crack a smile and lean into his hand, you missed his touch so much. “Will you be mine again Y/N?” he asked, worry behind his tone. If you’d say no he would be broken inside, but he would accept it and leave you alone for the rest of your life. You pulled his hand away and scooted up on the desk, bending your knees and launching yourself at him. You wrapped your arms and legs around the Slytherin boy. Draco stumbled back before wrapping his arms around you tightly “I’ll take that as a yes?” “Yes! You idiot! Don’t you ever do that again Draco Malfoy!”

“I won’t Y/N Malfoy”

♡~🐍~♡

A/N: This one lowkey broke my heart guys, like what in the fuck. Why did i write this? Anyway, if you have a request for Draco send it my way.

#draco malfoy x reader #draco x reader #draco malfoy #angst #draco malfoy x y/n #draco malfoy x you #harry potter #potterhead #x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #x fem!reader #x female reader #blaise zabini #slytherin

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carrotmakar · 4 years ago

Text

You Broke Me First

Pairing: Ex!Harry Styles x Reader

Word Count: 2,265

Summary: He broke your heart and wants you back, but you can’t take the chance. You can’t put your heart back in his hands. You can’t give him the opportunity to break you again.

Warning(s): Mentions of drinking, drunk calling, heartbreak, sadness

A/N: Anon requested: hey can you do something based on you broke me first by tate mcrae with harry?

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You broke me first Maybe you don’t like talking too much about yourself But you shoulda told me that you were thinking about someone else

There was something especially excruciating about finding out that the entire time you were in a relationship with someone, they were thinking about someone else. Every kiss, every touch, every reassurance was given with someone else in their mind, with someone else’s name on the tip of their tongue.

Dating Harry was what one would call a roller coaster ride that began at the top and crashed at rock bottom.

There was a long period of time when you held on solely because you thought that he was the best thing that had ever happened to you. And at the time, he was. He was everything that you could have ever asked for. He was everything that you had ever wanted.

If only you had been the same for him.

The last thing that any girl wants is to be called another girl’s name. That’s bad enough as it is, but when he said ‘I love you’ for the first time? That ruined you.

He noticed what he did the moment that the name left his mouth, but there was no taking it back.

You had walked out of his life a lot easier than you thought you would. You were extremely broken, sometimes you even thought you were beyond repair. But you managed to walk out that day and not come back.

You’re drunk at a party or maybe it’s just that your car broke down Or your phone’s been off for a couple months, so you’re calling me now

In the period of time that you’ve been separated - approximately four months - you haven’t heard from him once. At first, you wished that he would reach out and give you some sort of explanation. But then, after a month or so, you were glad that he didn’t. You were better off without you in your life.

He had seemingly forgotten about you altogether, and you were glad that he did. But if he forgot about you, then why was he calling you at three in the morning?

You answer, scared that something’s wrong. If he’s hurt and you don’t answer the phone, you’d hate yourself for it.

“Y/N.” He breathes, and you can immediately tell that he’s drunk. You roll your eyes. Of course he would drunk call you. Of course he wouldn’t call you if something were wrong. You definitely weren’t his first choice for that. You weren’t his first choice in your relationship, so why would the situation be any different now that the two of you didn’t interact at all?

“You’re drunk, Harry. You’ll regret this in the morning.” You sigh, running a hand over your face. “Call a cab, go home, and go to bed.” You don’t wait for him to reply, hitting the end call button and lying back down.

I know you, you’re like this When shit don’t go your way, you needed me to fix it

Most people probably would have at least made sure that he got home safely. But you knew him. You knew that he never went out alone. One of his friends would ensure that he got home without dying.

You also knew that the only reason that he was calling you at all was that something went wrong. He messed something up and now he was drinking it away and calling you to fix it for him. He does this every time that he ruins something. He runs to you so that you can help him fix whatever mess that he made.

You’re actually surprised that he took this long to call you, drunk and obviously wanting something from you. Four months is a long time, probably a new record for him if you really think about it.

And like me, I did But I ran out of every reason

Less than half a year ago, you would have run to him the moment that he asked for help. You would have pieced back together anything that he broke. You would have done anything in your power to get him back on the right track.

But now, there wasn’t a reason for you to do that. You aren’t his girlfriend. You aren’t his friend. Hell, you aren’t even in his life. So now, as much as your natural instinct told you to go running and save him from himself, you didn’t have a reason to, and you were finally at peace enough with the situation to accept that.

Now suddenly you’re asking for it back Could you tell me, where’d you get the nerve?

The next morning, you’re awoken by a sharp knock at your front door. You know that you didn’t invite anyone over, so you’re confused when the noise pulls you from your blissful state of unconsciousness.

You debate ignoring it, but then the knocking comes again, slightly louder and more urgent this time.

You groan into your pillow. Pushing yourself up out of bed, you trudge to the door and swing it open.

You’re not expecting the man in front of you to be the one standing at your door. You blink a few times, thinking that maybe you’re still dreaming.

The last time you saw that mop of curls in person, he was calling you by someone else’s name and breaking your heart into a thousand little pieces.

You open your mouth to say something. To say anything. Maybe to ask him what in the world he could possibly be doing by showing up on your doorstep.

He beats you to it, though, speaking before a single sound can come out of your mouth. “I miss you.”

You look at him expectantly. There’s no way that he came all the way to you just to say that.

After a moment, he continues. “I miss you and I messed up and I thought that I would be better with someone else, but I’m not. And I never was.” He runs his ring clad hand through his hair, the strands getting caught in the detailing on the bands. “God, I was so wrong. I messed up so bad and I don’t know what I’m doing here, really.”

“Where’s you get the balls to come here, Harry?” You spit, the words laced with venom. “Because I know for a fact that you didn’t have them the last time I saw you.”

Yeah, you could say you miss all that we had But I don’t really care how bad it hurts When you broke me first

“I- I don’t know. I just… I miss us, Y/N.” His eyes are pleading with you, begging you to give him another chance.

You don’t feel bad for him though. You can see the pain that he’s going through, but you simply can’t bring yourself to care. You were in his place just a few months ago, and he didn’t seem to care in the slightest.

“You can’t just show up like this, Harry.” You sigh, knowing that this will make you revisit the pain, the heartbreak that you tried so hard to push to the back of your mind.

Took a while, was in denial when I first heard That you moved on quicker than I coulda ever You know that hurt

“I know, I just…” he stops, at a loss for words.

“Harry, you can’t look at me and say all this and then just expect me to feel bad for you.” You run your hands over your face, trying to relieve some of the stress that this conversation is already causing you. “While I was at home crying my eyes out over the fact that you spent our entire relationship thinking about someone else, you were with that person. It was less than a week after you broke me into a million pieces when the first picture came to me. The first picture of you kissing her.”

“I’m sorry.” You roll your eyes at him and he whines your name, trying to get you to listen to him, to take some pity on how he’s feeling.

Swear for a while I would stare at my phone just to see your face But now that it’s here, I don’t really know what to say

“No, Harry. For the first month, at least, I would keep my phone near me, just in case you called me.” You can feel the tears surfacing. The pain that you pushed down is slowly rising and you hate him for making you have this conversation. “I used to wish that maybe you thought that you made a mistake.” You almost laugh at the irony. “But now that you’re here saying just that, I don’t want to hear it. Why are you here?”

“I miss-”

“Don’t use that excuse.” You snap, cutting him off. “You don’t miss me. What happened? What fell apart?”

I know you, you’re like this When shit don’t go your way, you needed me to fix it

“She broke up with me because I wasn’t committed enough.” He shrugs his shoulders like it’s no big deal.

“Why weren’t you committed enough?” You have a feeling that you already know the answer, but that doesn’t stop you from asking.

“Realized how much I wished that I had never messed up with you.” For a split second, you wish that he had never broken your heart. You wish that you could take the few steps between the two of you and wrap your arms around him. But you can’t do that, because it’s not your job to fix him anymore.

And like me, I did But I ran out of every reason

“I can’t fix that, Harry.” You sigh, knowing that this conversation isn’t going to end well. You’re not budging, and he wants you back.

“I don’t want you to fix that. I want to fix this.” He points between the two of you.

Now suddenly you’re asking for it back Could you tell me, where’d you get the nerve?

“Look, the entire time that we were together, you didn’t want it to be me. I can’t come back to you and believe it’s different just because you say it is. I can’t wait for another model to come along and have you break my heart into pieces again.” You hate breaking his heart, something you know that you’re doing by the way that he looks defeated.

Yeah, you could say you miss all that we had But I don’t really care how bad it hurts When you broke me first

“I promise that it won’t happen again, just please.” He whines your name again. There’s so much of you that wants to give in, but you just can’t. You can’t put your heart on the line for him again.

“I can’t Harry. Your promises mean nothing to me. Because you promised me last time that you wouldn’t lie to me. And you lied to me throughout the entirety of the relationship.” He looks down at the floor, scuffing his boot against the tile of the hallway.

What did you think would happen? What did you think would happen?

“I know, but please, let me show you that this time can be different.” His begging doesn’t sway you in the slightest. He couldn’t have thought that him coming here and simply apologizing and saying he wanted you back would do much.

He couldn’t have thought that was all it would take to get you back.

I’ll never let you have it What did you think would happen?

“Harry, no. I can’t put my heart in your hands again. I can’t trust you with that. And there’s nothing that you can say right now that will change that.” He finally looks back up at you and you see the tears lining his eyes, begging to fall.

You hate that you’re making him cry, that you can’t just give him everything that he could ever want. But you know how this will go. You’ll be fine until there’s a slight bump in the road and then you’ll be the one giving and giving and giving everything that you have to offer while he’s not offering you anything in return.

There’s no way that you can go through that again. You didn’t think that you’d make it the first time, and you know for a fact that there’s no chance of you surviving a second heartbreak like that.

Now suddenly you’re asking for it back Could you tell me, where’d you get the nerve?

“Okay.” He chokes out a sob and the look on his face makes tears well in your eyes. Watching him cry was never something that you could do. And here he was, standing in front of you, crying his eyes out.

“I’m sorry, Harry. I just can’t. I wish it could’ve been different.” You try to give him a small smile, but the tears begin streaming down your face and you know that there’s no way you’ll be smiling for a while.

Yeah, you could say you miss all that we had But I don’t really care how bad it hurts When you broke me first

“I’m sorry, too.” He mumbles. “I love you, Y/N. Wish I could’ve said it right the first time.” He says, before walking away.

You watch him until he turns the corner, and then you close the door. You don’t even make it to your room before you’re sobbing and gasping for air.

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed the piece! Again, make sure to reblog the fics that you like!

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#harry styles blurb #harry styles angst #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles writing #Zoey Writes

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sylvanfreckles · 3 years ago

Text

Day Four: "How about I treat you to dinner?"

"...yeah, thanks. No, we're gonna be late tonight. Uh-huh. Just make sure Patience gets some peace and quiet to study, even if you have to lock the other in the basement," Jody glanced over to where Dean was still staring at his phone, obviously dejected about something. "Yeah, sweetie. Yeah, me too. See you soon."

She stuffed her phone in the pocket and walked over to lean one hip against the banister next to Dean, studying his face until he eventually noticed her.

"Need something?" Dean asked.

"What's got you down?" she asked in reply, nodding at his phone. "Coroner won't be here for another two hours, did you need to take care of something?"

"What, no, everything's fine," he said, tucking his phone away.

She raised her eyebrows and stared at him. He mulishly folded his arms and stared out across the half-empty mall walkway.

"I've raised a house full of teenagers, Dean, I can literally do this all day," Jody finally said.

He huffed out a laugh and glanced at her, then looked away. "It's...Cas has this stupid truck."

"Uh-huh," Jody turned so that her back was to the banister, like Dean's, and folded her arms to mimic his posture. "And the problem with that is...?"

"It's a piece of crap!" Dean half-shouted. "He won't let me touch it because it's his 'responsibility' and he shoulda had the tires rotated two months ago and now he's stuck in the middle of nowhere with a flat and no spare!"

"Middle of nowhere?"

Dean glanced at her, then slumped ever-so-slightly. "Some Tires-R-Us place off exit 113."

"Well, sounds like that's taken care of," she said cheerily. "So what's the real problem?"

"Nothing," Dean replied, almost sullen now. "So two hours until the coroner?"

"Oh, no you don't," Jody stepped in front of him before he could move, holding her hands up. "You're gonna tell me what's going on and why it's got you looking like someone ran over your cat."

He sighed. "There was...I thought we'd have time for dinner."

She felt her eyebrows shoot up again. There were always the questions, jokes, and their total lack of personal space, but she hadn't realized it was official. He saw her face and waved her away.

"Not like that, it's just this stupid grill house. Cas decided he likes burgers now, and this place has some of the best I've ever had. He was supposed to get here in time to meet up and now...he says it's gonna be at least an hour before they even get to his truck."

Jody grinned, then outright laughed when he actually pouted at her. "You can take him later. We still have to hit the cemetery tomorrow, right? You guys can grab your burgers after that."

He seemed to relax after that, and Jody patted him on the shoulder.

"Come on," she said. "We still have to eat tonight. How about I treat you to dinner?"

#spncreatorsdailyhalloween #day three #how about i treat you to dinner #supernatural #mini fic #jody mills #dean winchester #vaguely destiel

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acabecca · 4 years ago

Note

2. “I kept quiet so I could keep you.” For Jas and Bucky!!

this got out of hand fast sorry about all the angst

also why is it so long

thanks for sending this mate sorry it’s taken me approx. 4 months to answer it 😌

Rinsing the conditioner out of her hair, Jas hummed to herself as she turned to grab the shower gel, yelping when she felt a pair of arms slip around her waist.

“It’s just me,” Bucky murmured from behind her, his voice still thick with sleep as he pressed his lips to her shoulder. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Jas tilted her head backwards to smile at him and he leaned down, gently brushing his lips against hers. “I thought we agreed there would be no more shower sex after last time,” she raised an eyebrow and Bucky’s cheeks flushed at the memory of him slipping, causing the both of them to fall to the floor. Sam had teased them both for weeks when he found out how Jas had really hurt her ankle.

“We did,” he nodded. “That’s not what this is. Just wanna be close to you.”

“Couldn’t have waited an extra three minutes?”

“No,” he shook his head, burying his face where her shoulder met her neck and placing a kiss there. “Needed to see you now.”

The smile slipped off Jas’ face and she turned in Bucky’s arms to look at him in concern. “Everything okay, Buck?”

Bucky bit the inside of this cheek. “Fine.”

“You are the worst liar I’ve ever met. Should have got Nat to give you lessons. You have this muscle right here,” her fingertips traced across his jaw and cheek, stopping just below his eye. “It twitches every single time you fib.”

Bucky narrowed his eyes. “That’s not fair. You don’t have any tells.”

“I learned from the best, that’s why. Now tell me what’s wrong,” she demanded and Bucky paused, his grip on her waist tightening. “Did you have a bad dream?” she asked, and he nodded reluctantly. “You wanna tell me what it was about?”

“Not… Not really,” he let out a breath. “No. I just wanna hold you for a bit. Is that okay?”

Jas smiled softly, draping her arms over his shoulders. “That’s fine, baby,” she replied and Bucky let out a grateful breath, pulling her body closer to him and burying his face in her wet her, his fingers digging into her hips. Jas leaned her forehead against his chest and closed her eyes, the sound of his heart pounding in his check making her swallow thickly.

She hated it when Bucky got too in his head. When he wouldn’t open up and talk to her about whatever it was that was bothering him. It usually meant that it was something he thought she would run away from him for, and she hated that he didn’t already know nothing could make her leave him. Nothing could make her stop loving him.

Almost as if he were reading her mind, Bucky muttered into her hair, “I love you. So much.”

When she heard his voice crack slightly on the last word, Jas pulled back and took Bucky’s face in her hands, feeling her heart break slightly when she saw unshed tears in his eyes.

“I love you too, Bucky. More than anything. Please tell me what’s-”

“Do you?” he asked quickly, interrupting her before he could think twice about his question. “Do you love me?”

“I- of course I do, Buck. Why would you-”

“Are you happy with me? Do I make you happy?”

“James,” she breathed. “I am the happiest I’ve ever been. Of course you make me happy. Why would you think that you didn’t?”

“And if- …If Steve was still here?”

Jas pulled away from him, her hands dropping to her sides as if it physically hurt her to touch him. “What?”

“If Steve was still here. What would we be?”

“But he isn’t here.”

“Would you still love me?”

Jas sighed, reaching behind her to turn the shower off. “Bucky-”

“Please,” his voice cracked. “Please. I need to know I’m not just the consolation prize.”

Jas’ brow furrowed and she crossed her arms over herself as she took in his words. Bucky knew instantly that he’d said the wrong thing in his desperation for validation, and he knew it was too late to take it back.

“…The consolation prize,” Jas repeated flatly, shaking her head in disbelief. “Wow,” she grumbled under her breath, pulling back the shower curtain and climbing out of the bathtub before wrapping herself up in the towel she pulled off the rail. Bucky scrambled to follow her, almost slipping as he did so, reaching down to grab his discarded boxers off the floor and pulling them back up his legs as he followed her back into their bedroom.

“Jasmine-”

“Do not even talk to me right now, James. Seriously,” she told him, her voice shaking and her back to him as she pulled a t-shirt out of the dresser.

“Let me explain-” he reached out to her but she shook him off as she attempted to pull a pair of boy shorts on with one hand, keeping a tight grip on her towel with the other. “Jasmine. Please.”

“You think you’re a consolation prize? Unbelievable,” Jas laughed coldly, pulling the t-shirt - Bucky’s t-shirt - over her head and throwing her towel on to the bed.

“What am I supposed to think?” he asked. “If Steve was here, I’d still be loving you from afar. You’d be with him.”

“That’s bullshit,” she spat, whirling round to face him. “Bull. Shit. How dare you ask me if you’re the consolation prize when you’re the one who left me? Twice!” she threw her hands in the air. “You left me twice and you have the nerve to stand there and insinuate I’m only here with you because Steve chose another woman. You are unbelievable. Unbelievable,” she repeated with a shake of her head. “I can’t- after everything we’ve been through, for you to stand there and look me in the eyes and ask me that is- it’s- Christ, Bucky, I don’t even-”

“What do you mean, I left you twice?”

She froze, her mouth snapping shut once Bucky’s question had stopped her from rambling. Grumbling under her breath, she just shook her head and turned to close the dresser drawers, screwing her eyes shut when she felt Bucky’s hand land on her shoulder.

“I don’t want to do this right now, James,” she told him in a whisper.

“Jasmine,” he turned her round to face him. “What did you mean?”

“You left me, Bucky,” she pushed his arm off her shoulder. “I got home and you were gone. I didn’t know what had happened, where you were. You walked out after promising me that you’d stay,” her bottom lip trembled as she finally met his eyes. “How can you think you’re a consolation prize when you’re the one who left? I spent six months reaching out to you and you ignored me every single time. It took Sam giving up the shield to bring you back into my life and sometimes, even now, after everything - sometimes I feel like you’ve settled for me because I’m the closest thing you have left of Steve.”

“I-” Bucky sucked in a breath. “Jasmine, no. I loved you before he left-”

“But you still didn’t stay with me!”

“I know, and I will spend every day of my life being sorry for it and being grateful that you gave me another chance-”

“I’m not talking about a year ago, Bucky! I’m talking about before!” she interrupted and Bucky froze, cocking his head to the side in confusion. Sighing, Jas ran her hands through her still wet hair and took a step backwards, but Bucky reached out and grabbed her wrist. “Bucky…”

“Please tell me what you mean,” he whispered. “I can’t make things right if you don’t talk to me.”

“Let go of me,” Jas told him, and he did so immediately, allowing her to take another few steps away from him until she sat on the edge of their bed, her fingers feeling with the hem of the t-shirt she was wearing. Bucky stayed where he was, his hands curling into fists anxiously. “I’m talking about the day T’Challa came to tell us Steve was on his way. I’m talking about when you said you didn’t want to fight anymore, and I told you that you didn’t have to. That I didn’t want to fight anymore, either. That I would leave with you if that’s what you wanted,” she murmured, wiping her nose with the back of her hand as she sniffled. “You just brushed it off. Said you could never leave Steve behind like that. Fought anyway. Died. And I’m not- I don’t blame you for like, being turned to dust, that’s not what I meant when I said you left me. I meant that you-… I don’t know what I mean. It felt like you kinda checked out. Like you chose Steve. Like you would always choose Steve. But I didn’t wanna fight, Buck. I didn’t want to be there; I didn’t want you to be there. I wanted to grab you and run,” she admitted.

Bucky had moved when she looked up, crouching down on the front in front of her, his hands on her thighs to steady himself. “I didn’t know you meant it. I thought it was just something you were saying to make me feel better. If I’d known… Sweetheart, you have to know that I would have gone with you in a heartbeat. I would have followed you anywhere. I loved you just as much then as I do now.”

“I loved you, too,” Jas smiled weakly, placing her hands on his and lacing their fingers together. “Then, I mean.”

“Shoulda told me. Would have saved us a hell of a lot of time.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m sure you would have taken that really well,” Jas rolled her eyes. “You would have ran for the hills. You were still recovering from everything that had happened to you, Buck, and you never would have betrayed Steve. I knew that, and I liked having you in my life, so I kept quiet so I could keep you.”

“Better late than never, I suppose,” Bucky gave her a smile, squeezing her hand and biting his bottom lip as he leaned back and eyed her. “You, uh… I saw you slip those lacey things on underneath my shirt. You tryin’ to make me lose it?” he raised an eyebrow, and Jas scoffed.

“No. I’m mad at you.”

“Oh, so it’s just a coincidence that you put those on and decided to wear my clothes too, when you know how both of those things make me feel?”

“Yep. Pure coincidence.”

“Sure, okay,” he nodded, leaning forwards slowly. “So if I tried to kiss you right now…?”

“I wouldn’t let you,” Jas shoved a hand in his face. “Because I’m mad at you.”

Bucky’s laugh was muffled against her hand as he wrapped his fingers gently around her wrist. Pulling her hand away from his face, he placed a soft kiss against her palm, then her wrist, and he continued up her arm until he kissed where her shoulder met her neck.

“You know,” Jas hummed as Bucky wrapped his left arm around her waist and pulled her closer to the edge of the bed. “This isn’t very fair. I’m trying to be mad at you, and you’re very distracting when you aren’t wearing a shirt.”

He huffed out a laugh, his face buried against her neck. “Love you,” he told her, kissing beneath her jaw before pulling back and looking in her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

Smiling softly, Jas draped her arms over his shoulders, nudging his nose with hers. “I know. I’m sorry, too. For overreacting.”

“You didn’t,” he shook his head, his hand slipping under her shirt and resting on her hips. “I got too in my head. Never shoulda doubted how you feel about me,” he placed another kiss on her jaw, his fingers trailing dangerously close to the waistband of her underwear. “Lemme make it up to you, honey.”

“Absolutely not,” Jas tried to slap his hands away, but Bucky held on to her tighter. “Bucky! I have to get ready, I’m going to see Clint and his family!!”

“Be late.”

“I was late last time!”

“Be late again,” he smirked, peppering kissing across her face. “Hell, just cancel on ‘em. Go tomorrow. Spend all day in bed with me.”

She squealed when his fingers dug into her hips. “Bucky Barnes you are incorrigible!”

“Can’t offend me when I don’t know what that means, darlin’,” he grinned, wiggling his eyebrows at her. “C’mon. Best part about falling out is making up, so let me make it up to you. Let me make you feel good,” he cooed, pushing her back gently until she was on her back, his hands pushing her t-shirt up her body. “You are so,” he paused, leaning down to kiss her. “Beautiful.”

“And you are a bad influence, Sergeant Barnes,” she smirked, and Bucky screwed his eyes shut with a groan, holding himself up on his forearms as he hovered over her. “You gonna make it up to me or what?”

Opening his eyes, Bucky grinned down at her as his hands crept further underneath her t-shirt. “For as long as you’ll let me, sweetheart.”

taglist: @sgtbuckyybarnes @mer-writes @jewelswrites-ish @foxesandmagic @hiddenqveendom @lukespatterson

Jas taglist: @ohhitherekatie @suethor @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123

let me know if you want to be added/removed!

#bucky barnes x oc #answered #sgtbuckyybarnes #i got halfway through editing this and gave up bye #it's SO LONG #and SO ANGSTY I AM SORRY #i hate the end but there we go #fic: start of an age #fic: band of thieves #series: long live #jas x bucky #long live: prompts #why do i give myself so many things to tag i hate my life #bye!

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suchalonelysunflower · 5 years ago

Text

You Broke Me First (C.H)

Pairing: former FWB!Calum X Reader

Requested: Yes!

Summary: Based on the song “You Broke Me First” by Tate McRae. You are trying to forget about the man who broke your heart, so it’s a surprise when his name appears on your phone again.

Warnings: Angst af. Language. Mild Smut. Mentions of Alcohol and cheating. Probably one or two grammar mistakes (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word count: 5K

Author’s Note: Requested by the lovely @thebasicbitch-things ✨ I loved writing this piece, maybe because I love the song so much, so thank you for requesting it and I hope I made it justice 💕. Feedback, reblogs and comments are always welcome and appreciated it! You can read my other works HERE. Happy reading! 🦋

@thebasicbitch-things : Can you write a Calum imagine based off the song You Broke me first by Tate McRae?? Like I’m just in a weeping mood. Thank you xxx

Maybe you don't like talking too much about yourself

But you shoulda told me that you were thinkin' 'bout someone else

You're drunk at a party or maybe it's just that your car broke down

Your phone's been off for a couple months, so you're calling me now

The liquid burns your throat, but you don’t really feel it anymore. When the heat starts spreading around the rest of your body is when you know you need another one. And another one. And another one. Anything to keep him from your mind.

It’s ironic how the memory of him still lingers on, even more with every drink you drown. Well, it’s not so ironic as it is shitty. But it’s at times like this, when you’re at a random club in the middle of the night surrounded by strangers trying to create stories of their own while all you want to do is forget, that the only thing your mind can focus on is him.

A year ago:

“Babe?” You heard his voice as he exited the bathroom. Still shirtless and with his boxers on, hanging loosely “Are you okay?”

You sat down on the bed, your naked skin barely covered by the messy sheets “Mhmm” you mumbled, still zooned out in your own thoughts and worries as you saw Calum grab his shirt and jeans from the floor.

It was always the same. He would call or text, you would meet with any excuse, hang out for a while before moving to the bedroom. The same old story of friends who fuck each other, with the same old ending every night: you in your bed watching him get dressed and close the door on his way out.

“Do you really have to leave?” You asked, already knowing the answer.

“I have to”

“No, you don’t have to”

“Y/N…”

You hated that condescending tone. Not only that, but you hated yourself, too. You and this whole messy situation you got yourself into. You didn’t know how bad of an idea it was to accept his proposal of friends with benefits when you already had feelings for him. But who could say no to Calum Hood? Especially with the hopes of becoming something more along the way.

At the beginning it was all you could dream of. The night seemed endless when he hold you close to him, breathing the same air as your bodies collided with each other, creating messes as you explored every inch of skin you had to offer, seeing stars explode with every right touch, hearing each other’s names like prayers coming from your parting lips. It was almost like you couldn’t get enough, almost.

“What? God, Calum, would it kill you to stay the night just once? Would it ruin your reputation of a heartthrob batchellor?”

“What has gotten into you?” He asked in confusion at your sudden outburst “You know the rules of this”

“Oh, the rules. Fuck them”

The rules were simple: Never overstaying, no exclusivity, don’t let others find out, never do anything public… but most importantly: Never fall in love. You had agree to that once, but most certainly broken almost every rule. You’ve fallen in love with him.

“Y/N…”

“It hurts, Calum” You said with glossy eyes “It hurts when you leave, and I- I can’t watch you do that anymore”

Calum’s eyes soften a bit. Debating whether or not he should stay. But after a pleading “Please” from your lips he caved in, laying down on the bed next to you, pulling you closer to him.

You smiled, allowing yourself to drift away in dreams and hopes of him laying next to you for the rest of your lives. Little did you know that those dreams were to be crushed next morning when you find an empty bed and a note with a little ‘sorry’ scribbled on it.

That was the first nights of many where he would lay down with you. Sometimes he would stay till morning and share a cup of coffee with you at breakfast. Other times he would disappear as a ghost in the middle of the night, only leaving the marks on your body as proof of his presence. It hurted, but at least you didn’t watch him walk away. You never watched as he did.

Took a while, was in denial when I first heard

That you moved on quicker than I could've ever, you know that hurt

Swear for a while I would stare at my phone just to see your name

But now that it's there, I don't really know what to say

You feel your friend’s grasp on your arm as they drag you down to the dance floor. Pulling you away from your own pity party as you watch how they sway to the beat of a song you’ve never heard of, soon joining them with the alcohol in your veins rushing towards your brain and taking control of your every move. ‘Tonight is not about Calum’ you tell yourself as you let the music take you away, already feeling the effects of the one too many shots you did earlier. But some things are easier said than done.

It’s funny, how after so many months of not seeing each other you can still feel him in your skin. You memorized the way his hands wrapped around your waist and the smell of his cologne. You could still feel his breath on your neck, the burning kisses he used to leave and the whispers that got lost inside a dream. Even now that you are dancing along to an ear shattering beat, the rhythm of your heart still beats and longs for him.

You can feel yourself in the dire need of another drink, desperate to push those memories away and cleanse yourself from his touch once and for all. You don’t care how many nights it would take, how many people or how many hangovers. You are determined to get that boy out of your system, where he won’t hurt you anymore.

“Y/N!” Your friend yells over the music, gesturing towards your hand “Your phone is glowing!”

You bring your phone to your face, trying to focus on the image that’s plastered across the screen. A name pops up, a name you haven’t seen in so long.

Muttering an “Oh fuck” you press ‘decline’ over and over again, until Calum stopped calling.

Seven months ago:

It’s been two weeks since you last heard from him. It’s been two weeks since he left you alone in a fuzz. It’s been two weeks since he slammed the door and he still hasn’t called.

Maybe he was right and you fucked everything up. But you were sure of your words, you know there’s truth to them, so you stan by them. He will soon realize his mistake, he has to. He wouldn’t leave you like that, would he? He must know he hurt you, he must. The words he said… they are like tattoos on your mind, they don’t seem to fade with time. But you knew it wasn’t entirely your fault. You were as guilty as he was.

For the past two weeks you’ve been glued to your screen, hoping for his name to appear. Taping your screen randomly to see if you’ve gotten a text or a call or a dm or even a fucking email. But nothing ever came.

It wasn’t until you were scrolling down Twitter that you saw it.

It was a paparazzi photo, he was wearing a classic tee and the sweatpants you once told him were your favorite on him. His hair was longer, or at least it seemed like it, his eyes avoiding the cameras as he walked through the busy streets of LA as he normally would. The only difference is the hand that was holding his.

A lump formed in your throat as you opened the tweet to find a thread of even more pictures of him with the mysterious person, grabbing them by the waist and smiling as they came closer. The paparazzi seemed to catch every single intimate moment he was able to show in public, much more than he ever showed you when you were both out and sober, at least. But Calum seemed happy, and that hurt you the most.

A thousand questions ran through your head as you ignored the happy tweets from fans celebrating that his favorite band member finally got a significant other. How long has this been going on? Did he ever tell you about it? You never claim exclusivity, so it could’ve had happen when you were still ‘together’, meaning he choose them. He left you and chose them, replacing you and everything you didn’t get to have without even saying goodbye.

Swallowing the bitterness of the memory with a shot of tequila, you press decline once again and order another drink. What would you say to him anyway? Would you curse him? Would you kiss him? Would he even apologize or pretend that it never happened? The truth is, you don’t even want to know.

You catch some flirty eyes from across the bar, but you ignore them as you try to collect your thoughts on this whole situation, and besides, don’t need another heartbreak at the moment.

“That guy hasn’t taken his eyes off you since he came in” Said the bartender, pouring you another drink.

You lift your gaze towards ’pretty eyes’ over the bar, but he already seemed to have lost interest in you as his eyes scattered all over the room, looking for another person to spend his time with.

“Doesn’t seem like it” You nod toward the other end of the bar.

“What? No, not him. Him!”

They point behind you and you turn around quickly, a pretty bad idea considering how drunk you are at the moment. But wasted or not, you would recognize those eyes anywhere.

Calum is standing in the middle of a sea of people, but his eyes are solemnly focusing on you as he raises his phone to his ear, raising his eyebrows as he hears the dial tone. Almost immediately, your phone starts ringing next to you with the all too familiar name popping out again.

Without breaking eye contact, you press decline once again, standing up quickly as you start to walk up to the nearest exit, trying to get away from him as fast as you could. ‘Tonight is not about Calum’ you told yourself earlier that night, and yet there he was, pushing his way through a drunk crowd to get towards you.

“Y/N!” You hear him call, but you are not stopping. You don’t need this confrontation right now. You don’t want to see him or talk to him. You want to forget him and everything you ever did.

Feeling like your chest is going to explode at any second, you accelerated your pace, not caring how many people you have to push to get to the door as long as he doesn’t find you. Your legs, however, had other plans as they give out due to the mix dizziness and adrenaline you were feeling, just mere meters from the exit. You curse your past self for having so many drinks as you try to get up. But, soon enough, you feel an arm rounding around your waist and pulling you to your feet.

After almost eight months you find yourself reflected in those eyes again. The same eyes that made you feel butterflies in your stomach everytime he looked your way. You couldn’t help but get drawn into them, remembering that the last time you saw them they replaced the desire with anger, shaking you to your core.

He was saying something, you were sure of it because his mouth is moving “What?!”

“I said, Why aren’t you answering your phone?!” He yelled over the music. Your drunk mind can’t decide if you want to slap him or kiss him or cry right there on the spot.

“That’s none of your business! Now please let go of me, I want to go home”

You push yourself away from his grasp “Y/N, please I need to ta-“ He interrupted himself as he watched you almost trip over your own feet again, clearly too drunk to stand straight. In a matter of seconds, he was by your side again, this time pulling your arm over his shoulders so you could lay on him “Wha- How many drinks did you have?”

“As many as I needed” You scoffed, trying to pull away, but his grip on your waist was stronger.

“For what?! Drown yourself?”

“I needed to forget you” Calum clenches his jaw, feeling like his heart was shattered into a million pieces “But that’s clearly not working, given that you are here. Would you please let me go?”

“Y/N you are too drunk to function,”

“Am not!”

“Please, let me take you home. I need to talk to you”

“Leave me alone, Calum. I don’t need you and I most definitely don’t want to talk to you”

You turn your face to him. It has been a long time since you last saw him. He has more curls now, and a little five o’clock shadow, but his yes,,, oh, his eyes. The time stops, or at least it feels like it, it was almost like the first time you saw them, magnetic and filled with something you couldn’t decipher, but now they had something different. They were hurting, pleading, almost begging you for something you didn’t quite understand at the moment, but you know you couldn’t say no to those eyes, at least not here and not in your condition.

So after making sure you could stand properly, you caved “Fine”

I know you, you're like this

When shit don't go your way you needed me to fix it

And like me, I did

But I ran out of every reason

The car ride was as silent as a tomb. The sounds of the city night and the flashing of streetlights were your only source of distraction. You looked through the window, not wanting to make any eye contact with the man that broke your heart. He, however, was anxious for you to spare a glance towards him. Calum’s fingers taped the steering wheel nervously, he wanted to fill the silence with something, anything. But his words came short as he realized that you weren’t the person he knew, you were a stranger sitting in his car. The clothes you were wearing, the state of drunkenness you were in, the anger behind your eyes and words, and the fact that you couldn’t even stan him touching you… that was not the Y/N he knew.

Once you reached the house, you didn’t even wait for him to turn the car off as you practically jumped out of the seat and went to open the door. Calum quickly following you, half of him afraid that you might hurt yourself, the other half afraid that you would lock him out.

He let out a breath of relief as you let him in. Remembering the last time he was here.

Seven and a half months ago:

It was a normal afternoon for the two of you. Things were going well, Calum started to be more open towards you, spending the night, cuddling and hanging out more without the promise of sleeping together afterwards and you loved it. You were having fun as well, you would walk Duke together or cook dinner or just exist together by watching a movie or listening to his favorite songs that you “absolutely needed to hear” And today was no different as you cuddled with him watching one of Netflix’s crappy teenage movies. Things were going well, or so you thought.

You were straddling him, lips melting together as the movie was long forgotten. His hands were cupping your ass, setting a slow pace with your hips as you grinded on him. You whole body was on fire, ready to burst when his lips made their way down your neck, leaving marks that you would later trace with your fingers as you try to hide them.

“Calum,” You moaned softly as he found your sweet spot under your ear, sucking and biting it like only he knew how. Your hands flew to the back of his head, fingers lost in his hair, tugging it lightly every time he met your hips with a dry thrust.

He groaned, drunk to sounds you were making. He loved the effect he had on you, almost as much as the effect you had on him. It was addictive, dangerous. He knows he shouldn’t play with fire, but what a lovely way to burn it was.

You moaned again when you felt his teeth grazing your jaw, finding their way to your lips again. The rolling of your hips was faster, more desperate than before, the friction was almost unbearable. You needed him with a passion “C-Calum…”

“Tell me what you want, baby” He said with a raspy voice, breathing onto your neck “Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you”

You shuddered at his words, getting dizzy with his touch, his soft groans and his eyes filled with lust, looking straight into your soul, burning like the sun.

You grabbed his head by the sides, pulling him closer until your foreheads pressed together “You” you whispered loud enough for him to hear “I want all of you, Calum”

A couple of hours passed and you were still laying on the sofa, cuddled against the naked chest of the bassist. His fingers were caressing your sides as both of your breathings became even, coming out of your highs.

You felt infinite in his arms, safe and wanted. You wanted this to last forever, to have him only for yourself and be his everything. You craved for more intimate looks, for innocent touches while in public, you wanted to show the world how in love you were with this man that has, not only conquered your heart, but also your soul. You loved him, and you hope with your whole heart that he loves you too.

“What’s on your mind?” He asked, drawing circles down your arm.

You debated on whether to tell him the truth or not. You knew Calum had always denied himself the possibility of love, stating time and again that he doesn’t really believe in it. But you’ve seen a change in him for the last few months you were together. He was more caring, more attentive, staying longer than he should and being there for you when you needed, not only for a quick fuck anymore. Maybe the chances of him loving you back were not as low as you thought.

“I meant what I said earlier, you know?” You ventured, lifting your gaze to meet his. He gave you a quizzical look, not really sure of what you were referring to “I do want all of you, Calum”

He smiled “You have me now”

“Yeah,,, but that’s not what I meant”

Taking a brave step, you pushed yourself forward and kissed him. You were done hiding the feelings you’ve been accumulating over the years, ready to let yourself go and drown on him. Only him.

Calum, however, was taken by surprise. Pulling himself from you.

“I thought we agree on not to catch feelings for each other” He said coldly. Already sitting up and looking across the room for his clothes.

You sat and watched as he got up from his spot on the couch and started to dress as fast as he could.

“Cal-“

“We agreed, Y/N. We said no string attached. Goddammit, everything was going so well, but you had to fuck it up, didn’t you?”

His words hit you like a ton of bricks. Shattering you completely from the inside. You tried to collect your thoughts as the tears threatened to come out, but Calum kept going.

“What the hell were you thinking? What were you expecting? Huh?”

“It’s not my fault that I love you” Your voice sounded broken, weak, and you hated that. How could he be so angry? What gave him the right when you were the one who was hurting?

“Well, it’s not mine either! Is it?” Calum said with exasperation, putting on his shirt.

“I thought-“

“What? That I loved you? Y/N, I don’t love anyone! You knew that when we started this!”

“And what am I to you then?!” You matched his tone of voice, tears were already spilling down your face but you didn’t care. You were fuming “What am I, Calum? A friend? A good fuck? Huh? Was I just a toy that you could play with every time you felt needy? Have you ever thought of me as something more?”

Calum’s stare was cold as ice. He was standing in the middle of the living room, clenching his fists to either side of his body until his knuckles became white. You, on the other hand, were sitting on the couch, crying. But your eyes burned with anger as you saw how carelessly he was invalidating your feelings, throwing everything away just because he couldn’t admit his own. A silent war was being fought between the two of you, both of you so scared but with nothing left to lose.

It seemed like ages had passed before Calum spoke again, grabbing his jacket and heading towards the door.

“Was there ever something more?”

You kept staring at the nothing he left behind, the last thing you heard was the slamming of your front door, leaving you alone and completely heartbroken.

Calum followed you into the kitchen, completely avoiding the living room where he last saw you, where he left you. He felt weirdly unwelcomed as you poured yourself a glass of water without even offering one to him, maybe he was.

You drink your water slowly, thinking that that will give you time to think on what to say to him. Maybe he would start talking soon, but the only thing he does is stare at you from the other side of the kitchen island. “How did you know where I was?” You asked.

“Your friend’s stories. You may have blocked me from yours, but they haven’t”

Then, silence came over you again. It was almost like he was waiting for you to say something, just like you always did. You played this game before, you are not going to cave. You are not going to give him the satisfaction of controlling the situation here.

“I need to talk to you” He finally said, letting his shoulders relax for a bit.

“You keep saying that. But you sure haven’t done a lot of talking”

The tension in the room was so thick that it could easily be cut by a knife. You always wondered what you would say to him, what would you feel the next time you saw him and, right now, you felt like there was nothing more to say. He had no right appearing into your life again, not when you were picking yourself together after he shattered you.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry”

“For what, exactly?” The venom in your voice was palpable, Calum knew this was not going to be easy for him “For leaving me here alone and then got yourself another person to play the ‘couple’ part? For practically calling me a whore? Or for giving me shit because of what I felt for you, knowing damn well you felt the same?”

You tilted your head, waiting for his answer, but it seems you left him speechless. Good.

Calum ran his hand through his curls, staring at the floor then back at you “I fucked up”

“That much is true”

“I’m serious, Y/N” He started walking towards you “I’m sorry for everything, you are right. You always are. I just- I didn’t know what to do! I panicked and-“

“And that’s your excuse of why you ran away instead of facing the problem?”

“I was scared! Okay? Is that what you wanted to hear?” Calum raised his voice. He was now standing a couple of feet in front of you, so close and yet so far away from you “Y/N, I was so fucking scared. You know that I’ve never had a committed relationship before, that I never let things get too far but with you.. God, I never felt the same with anyone like that before not after you. And then you said all of those things and I- Hearing you say that you love me was too much, I couldn’t process it and instead of saying something coherent I just lashed out on you and you didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry”

Calum took a step forward, softly grabbing your hand and intertwining his fingers with yours. He took your silence as his cue to continue.

“You were always there for me, every time I needed you were there. No questions asked, no judging, not waiting for something in return. Always making me laugh, supporting me and letting me take a break from the messy life I have. You were the best thing in my life and I took you for granted. I hate that it has taken me this long to realize that, but I just miss you, Y/N. I miss us, so much that you can’t imagine how much it hurts. I need you with me, please let’s just go back to where we started. Or we can start over, whatever you want! But, please, baby, please don’t leave me”

And just before you know it, Calum cupped your cheek with his free hand and brought your face closer to him, crashing his lips into yours. You responded almost immediately by parting your lips and granting him more access, getting completely lost inside the kiss.

For a moment it felt like the old times, he tastes just like you remember and his touch stills makes your skin erupt with goosebumps. For years you’ve been waiting for this, for him to feel the same about you and love you without any fears or doubts, claiming that he was yours and you were his. You wanted this for so long… but why does it feel so bad?

Gathering all the courage you could manage, you push Calum away from you.

“S-stop!” You said, trembling “Stop, this isn’t right”

He gave you a confused look as he took a step back “Y/N-“

“What about your partner? Calum, did you at least break up with them before you came to find me?” The way he looked at the floor gave you all the answers you needed. You raised your hand to your forehead, suppressing the urge to cry or laugh at his antics “Oh my God”

“I was going to! I swear I just-“ He failed to find an excuse “Things were doing awful between us lately, Y/N. You have to understand, I-“

“What?!” You spat “that you had to make sure I was on board with all of this?! I am not a consolation prize, Calum. I am not a second choice!”

“Baby, I know. I-“

“Don’t call me that!”

Calum took another step back, he has never seen you so angry before.

“How dare you? How. Dare. You, Calum. Coming here after eight months! saying all that shit about how much I mean to you when it’s just bullshit”

“Y/N, it’s not-“

“I’m not fucking finish” You say raising a hand to silence him “Could you tell me, where'd you get the nerve? I don’t get a single text or call or fucking smoke signal from you for eight months, knowing how I felt about you, and now suddenly you're asking for it back? Saying that you miss all that we had? We had nothing, Calum. We were nothing more than just a fuck around, you said it yourself, didn’t you? There was no ‘us’ for you to miss. You made damn sure of that. You don’t miss me, not really. You miss how I made you feel. How easy it was for me to be there for you every time you called, well, I’m tired of fixing all your problems, I ran out of every reason to do it.

And I was so stupid, you know? For believing just for a second that this could actually mean something when it never meant something to you in the first place! Did you even think about how I would feel about all of this? Of course not! Why would you? After all, I’m just Y/N! The one who always gets stepped on, why should my feelings matter? If I’m always going to be there for you and everything you ask for. Well, fuck that!”

“Y/N..” Calum tried to intervene, but you couldn’t hear him.

“You want to know what I did after you left? I cried myself to sleep for weeks, reliving every moment we had, every word you said just before you left. Waiting by the phone for hours just to see if you’d call. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, I was the living incarnation of death because I realized I lived just for you. Well, not anymore. You said you were hurting, you have no idea what I went through so, I’m sorry, but I don't really care how bad it hurts. I’m done. We are done”

You walk by him and towards the front door, opening it as an invitation for him to leave. Calum, however, remained standing in your kitchen, staring at you with glossy eyes.

“Baby, please don’t do this” He said with a trembling voice “I don’t know what to do without you I’m- I’m broken”

You were still standing by the door. Unmoving and without an inch of sympathy for the man crying in front of you.

“You broke me first, Calum. But I’m all glued back together now, and I did it by myself. Hope one day you could learn to do that too”

And, for the first time in months, you saw him leave.

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carllisle · 4 years ago

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In honour of @notquitetwilight ’s birthday, here is the latest instalment of the Cullanos prequel, the famous incident involving Esme, Carlisle’s second wife, and a motorcycle-shaped pizza slicer.

For those who have missed the instalments so far, see below:

The Second Mrs Cullano - Carlisle’s wedding to Wife 2

A Taste of Boston Part I - Carlisle and Wife 3 Esme take business with the daughter they are newly reunited with to Boston

A Taste of Boston Part II - Carlisle and Esme take on a hit job while their daughter Rosalie gets to grips with this new lifestyle

More content can be found on @notquitetwilight ‘s blog under the tag the-cullanos and on my blog @carllisle under the tag the-cullanos.

This instalment has content warning for sex (not explicit) and violence. Don’t get us wrong, this is still shitposting. But at this point we are really, really invested. Shout to @stregoni-benefici and @carlislesscarf who are screaming in the back of the clown car that me and Juliet are steering.

The Second Wife and the Pizza Slicer

Esme liked the rain. She liked how the streetlights reflected in the water on the pavement, the neon colours lighting up her path. It didn’t lighten her black mood. The sound of her stiletto steps were lost in the rain as she marched down the street like she owned it. Half of it she did own, not that the IRS needed to know that. There was only one shopfront she was interested in tonight, though. Ahead, the pizzeria stood dark and empty, unassuming and inconspicuous wedged between a barbers’ shop, and a meat deli. Convenient for the pizzeria to have one of their suppliers next door. Those shops were closed too but that was to be expected; it was after 1am.

Her heart raced in anticipation as she walked through the darkness. Between the buildings was a small alleyway and she slipped down it. At the back door of the pizzeria was Tony, the long-time security guard who took most night shifts on the property, and Esme forced a smiled at him. “Hey handsome. They leave you out here without an umbrella?”

He grinned at her, rain dripping down his bald head and onto his coat. “I left it on the subway on my way in.”

“Carl not give you a lift?” Tony lived practically on Carlisle’s route into the pizzeria and he often picked him up when they both had to come in. Tony glanced at the sleek Mercedes that was hidden at the back of the alley and shook his head. “The mrs came in with him today.”

The mrs. Snakes writhed in her stomach. She couldn’t bite back her spite and it wiped the smile off her face. “Is the cunt with him now?”

“Nah. She left ‘bout an hour after they arrived. Carlisle helped them out in the kitchen tonight and she didn’t much like being left alone.”

“Heaven fuckin forbid she make herself useful. She’s only meant to be four months pregnant, ain’t she? Not exactly time for her confinement.”

Tony’s smile faltered. “Something like that. You got any weapons on ya?”

Esme frowned. “What if I say no? Ya gonna pat me down?”

“No. Won’t let you in, though. You’re always packin’.”

“You got me there.” Esme opened her coat, taking out her two handguns - white and inlaid with mother-of-pearl - and handing them over. Tony raised his eyebrow and she rolled her eyes. Knives were taken out of each shoe along with the two throwing-stars strapped to her thigh.

“Is that everything?”

“You know I don’t need weapons to kill him, right? I could kill him with my bare hands.”

“I know.” He hid her weapons in his coat carefully. “But you won’t. So I don’t worry.”

Fury rippled through her and her eyes went wide for a moment, but he held her gaze and she let out a hard breath through her nose. He was right. “You’ve worked for us too fuckin long. You can read me too well.” But her hard face broke and she gave him a genuine, albeit brief, grin. Anger had only flared in her because he was too right. “Here,” she gave him her umbrella. “You need this more than me.”

Tony smiled. “Thanks, Esme. In ya go.” And he pressed his thumb to the scanner on the door and let it swing open.

She lightly punched him on the shoulder as she passed, and waited for the door to close before making her way down the corridor. Ahead were the stairs to Carlisle’s office and she ran up them quickly, anger creeping back. It had been months since she had been here last. Since Mrs Cullano announced to the world her pregnancy, actually. Esme had cut off all contact with Carlisle that day. He had broken her goddamn heart and sadness hadn’t yet set in. She was still a raging fire and she was ready to burn down anyone who came too close. But when he had called her sounding unhinged and told her to meet her here, she couldn’t tell him no, cause she knew that tone he had - it was the same one he had had when, six months ago, they had been told that ten million had gone missing. Esme had recovered it from the 15-year-old hacking prodigy who had stolen it before adding her to the payroll, but before that Carlisle had been enraged and dangerous and he needed her to hold him back. Something bad had happened.

“Carlisle?” The door to his office was unlocked but he wasn’t inside and it was dark. On the far side of the room was a wall of bookshelves and she quickly crossed to it and pulled on one book - The Godfather by Mario Puzo - and the bookshelf swung open like a door. Carlisle had always joked how cool he thought secret doorways were and they both thought the choice of book to be the secret lever was funny. It felt like a million years ago. It felt like yesterday. Behind it was another corridor and a metal spiral staircase that led down to the final door - that only opened one way - into the restaurant below. No one was allowed to use this but Carlisle and Esme, not even Mrs Cullano. Her heels clacked on the iron and her fur coat dragged out behind her. She tossed it aside on one of the booths close to the kitchen and she caught sight of her reflection in the windows. No, I don’t want to seduce my ex boyfriend, she had told herself earlier, but her wardrobe choice said otherwise. She wore the red satin dress he had bought her for his second wedding, backless save for chains of diamonds and clinging to every curve she had, and the ring he had bought her as a sign of their commitment still kept its place on her right hand. She looked away, embarrassed at how long it had taken her to make her hair so sleek and soft, or how long it had taken to slap on her face. It was exactly how she had looked at his wedding, like she wanted to punish him for marrying that bitch.

“Carlisle?”

“Kitchen,” came his reply.

She strutted through the kitchen door and tried to keep her breathing under control. After not seeing him for so long, the sight of him was overwhelming. Carlisle stood at the salad bar chopping lettuce. On the counter behind him was a fresh pizza, the slicer forgotten next to it.

“You didn’t sound right on the phone.”

“I ain’t right.” He looked up at her and his eyes went wide. “Oh God, Es. You look…”

“Whaddya want?”

His jaw clenched. “It’s her.”

“Her?” Esme heard the spite in that one word. “Your baby bank?”

Carlisle turned to toss the knife he was using into the sink. “Don’t call her that.”

“What? You don’t want me calling her what she is?”

“She ain’t.”

Esme laughed bitterly. “She got your baby in her, ain’t she? The fuck else you want me to call her? Yummy mommy? Mother of your child? Gimme a fuckin break.”

“Es-”

“No, don’t! You called me out here in a fuckin storm to help with your marital problems? Get outta here!”

“Es-”

“I don’t wanna hear it! You dragged me out here in the middle of the fuckin night to tell me you got problems with your cunt of a wife? The one you knocked up who’s now shouting from every fuckin rooftop that Carlisle Cullano came in her! God, it makes me sick.”

“What the fuck is wrong with-”

“Shut up!” Esme stared at him across the kitchen. It was hard not to cry. It felt like her heart was breaking. When she had heard that Mrs Cullano was pregnant it felt like her world was collapsing. In the month and a half since then everything had gone black and white but that was what it was always like without her other half, just empty. Carlisle put colour into the world.

“Weeks without contact and this is how we’re gonna start, huh?” His words weren’t gentle. He looked wounded. “Not even a ‘hello’?”

Esme sucked her teeth. “Hi.”

Carlisle laughed humourlessly. “So we’ll cut the bullshit, will we? Right to it? Where the fuck have you been?”

“On vacation.”

“Where?”

“Nowhere in particular. Just needed a break.”

“From what, Es? Me? What’s got you so bothered?”

“Your kid, Carlisle! She’s having your fuckin baby!” Esme’s shout came short and furious and she threw a plate at the far wall. It smashed loudly. “D’ya know what that’s doin to me?”

He stared at her across the kitchen, mouth open and eyes wide. He looked angry. “Ain’t that what you wanted for me? To have a wife and kids, cause you knew it’s what I wanted? I did what you told me.”

Esme threw her hands into the air. “Yeah, and?”

“I’m not a fuckin mind reader!” He slammed his fists on the metal worktop, his voice getting louder. “‘I want you to have a wife and a family’, that’s what you said to me on the morning of my fucking wedding! I asked you to marry me on the day of my fucking wedding to her! And you turned me down again! I did what you told me to do and now you’re fucking punishing me! How’s that fair?”

Blond hair fell into his eyes like it did when they fucked. His face was red like it was then too. Esme saw the pain in his face, the anger that matched her own. “You shoulda known.”

“You didn’t even know. I can’t read minds and I can’t see the future and I can’t feel how you’re feelin unless you tell me!”

“Alright.” Esme stormed over to him and slammed her hand on the counter next to his. She raised her chin in a challenge. “I hate her. I hate her perfect face, her perfect fuckin body, every strand of hair on that empty fuckin head. I hate that you chose her.”

“I didn’t!” He seemed to tower over her but she stood her ground. “I chose you! I choose you every goddamn time! But you don’t ever choose me! Do you know how many times you broken my heart?”

If it was half the number of times she had broken her own heart, Esme was sorry. She swallowed the lump in her throat. It was impossible to talk about right now. “You gonna tell me why you’re calling me out here sounding like that?”

It looked like Carlisle wanted to shout again and his hands balled into fists either side of his salad.. “She ain’t pregnant, and if she was it wouldn’t be mine. Probably my cousin Renato’s.”

That pulled Esme up short. There was too much to unpack. “Whaddya talkin about?”

“She been fuckin him. For months, Es. Maybe a year.”

“Renato? But why? He looks so much like you but he’s got half the braincells and twice the idiocy. Why’s she fuckin a Dollar Tree version of you?”

“Cause I weren’t gettin her pregnant.” He dropped his gaze.

Esme blinked, trying to process it. Her lash extensions were heavy and made her vision go funny, so she fixed her gaze on Carlisle’s face instead. “How’d you find out about them?”

“She kept sneaking off so I had her followed. Got plenty of photos proving it. I’ve seen way more of Renato than I’m comfortable confessing to Father Thomas, but at least he looks like me. Guess it’s kinda like watching my clone fuck my wife.”

“That ain’t right. And why the fuck would she lie about being pregnant?” Esme’s hands were trembling.

He sighed. “She knows I don’t love her and I think she knows I wanna leave but she would miss the money, ya know? So she wants a way to keep me tied to her.”

Esme’s anger was bubbling beneath the surface. She hated that bitch more than ever for making Carlisle look like that. “How did ya find out about the faked pregnancy?”

“Medical records are kept online now. Your little hacker found hers. Two weeks ago she had a negative pregnancy test at her doctors’, and another one twelve weeks ago. There was never a fuckin baby.”

“That lying cunt. Why’d you think it’s your cousin’s if there had been one, anyway? Ain’t you hittin it raw?”

“Yeah. But… I can’t have kids.”

“We had one. Or did you forget?”

Carlisle grabbed Esme’s wrist and roughly pulled her closer. “I think about her every day, Es. Every goddamn day, just like I think about you.”

“Don’t.” She tried to pull away half-heartedly, her voice angry. “I can’t.” He ran his fingers through her hair and she stumbled closer until their bodies were pressed together. Knowing the wife wasn’t pregnant had broken down one of Esme’s walls. “Why’d you say you can’t have kids?”

“I got the snip.”

“When?”

“Two weeks into my first marriage.”

Esme gripped the front of his jacket in both hands. “Why?”

He slid his hands to the small of her back and his fingers caught on the diamonds. “You look so fucking good, Es.”

She shook him lightly. “Why’d you do that?”

Carlisle grinned half-heartedly. “Cause I knew I didn’t want no kids with no one but you.”

“I wanted to die when I heard she was knocked up.”

He stroked her hair again. “Don’t say that, Essie.”

“I mean it. I thought about it, ya know? I was gonna drive my car into the Hudson and let it drown me.”

“Hey.” Carlisle held her chin between his finger and thumb and tilted her face up to look her in the eye. “Don’t ever say that, baby. I ain’t livin in a world without ya, alright? You go, I go.”

She took his hand and kissed his palm, keeping her gaze locked with his. “You go, I go.”

“I fuckin love you, Es.”

“I fuckin hate her.”

“Yeah, me too.” Carlisle sighed and ran his finger down her neck and torso, watching how the silk of her dress moved over her skin. “What are we gonna do?”

“We? She’s your wife.”

He chuckled. “My problem is your problem, ain’t it?”

Esme hit his chest again. She was still furious. “Unfortunately, yeah. Want me to kill her?”

“Nah. I don’t want cops sniffing around ya. Someone else should probably do it.”

“Tanya owes me a favour, what about her?”

“Don’t trust her, Es, she’ll double cross ya soon as she’ll fuck ya.”

She managed half a smirk. “Weren’t that long ago she fucked us. Guess we’re due for a double crossing, then. So not her. The Blacks?”

“They don’t trust us and I can’t blame em for that. We’ll think of someone.”

There was a long silence then. Esme pulled free from his arms and slowly wandered around the pizzeria kitchen. Her heels echoed over tile and steel. She was the other side of the industrial island counter and Carlisle was arranging his salad into edible art when she spoke again. “I wanna do it, Carl.”

“What?” He looked up at her with lettuce sticking out the corner of his mouth.

“I wanna be the one.”

“I dunno if that’s the best idea.” He turned away from her to grab a slice of pizza that was on the counter behind him.

“You married the cunt.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t know she was gonna be this fuckin crazy!” Carlisle protested indignantly. He took a bite and wrinkled his nose. “Fuck. Why does my dough always turn out like shit?”

“Cause you ain’t ever learned from the Old Country. You do it the American way.”

“Shut the fuck up!” he laughed. “Most Italian place you ever been is the Shore!”

“That’s cause my cheap partner never took me on vacation anywhere more exotic than Miami Beach!” She strutted back over to him and took a bite from the slice. “God, it is shit. Reckon even Renato could do better.”

He laughed again and wrapped her in his arms and stroked the skin of her back. “I missed you, ya know?”

“Yeah, me too. But I mean it, Carlisle. I wanna be the one to pull the trigger.”

Sweeping her hair over her shoulder, Carlisle kissed her neck. “You gonna shoot her?”

It was impossible to keep her eyes open. “Maybe. I dunno. Fuck,” she sighed quietly when he bit where her neck met her shoulder. She had missed him more than words could say. “I want her gone. She betrayed you and she took you from me.”

His kisses moved down her collarbones and to the neckline of her dress. “No one can ever take me from you, Esme. I’m yours.” When he grasped her by the waist and turned her, she knew what he wanted. He lifted her onto the counter next to the bad pizza and he kissed her mouth. She parted her lips and grinned when she tasted salad and pizza margherita on his tongue. It didn’t matter. It was him.

After a while he sank to his knees in front of her and pushed up her red dress. “Fuck, Es. No underwear? Did you come here with an agenda?”

“Who says I wasn’t going somewhere else after here?” she asked, but her voice was shaky as he pulled her to the edge of the counter. She gripped the edge for support and the pizza slicer brushed her fingers.

“You sleeping with someone else?” Carlisle murmured against her inner thigh.

“Well since we stopped seeing each other, I have an opening available.”

“No you fuckin don’t.” His blond head disappeared under the short hem of her dress and Esme wondered, in the back of her mind, if Tony would be able to hear her screams. Carlisle certainly liked her taste better than the pizza.

Some time later they were both so lost in their passion that they didn’t hear the unlocking of the front door or the quiet steps in the restaurant. Esme’s face was buried in Carlisle’s neck as he pounded her on the counter and his eyes were closed in bliss.

“What a fuckin surprise.”

Both of their gazes snapped to the kitchen door that had swung open. Stood in the unflattering industrial fluorescents stood Mrs Cullano, a pistol raised. It reminded Esme of the one she had taken to their wedding. Unreliable, difficult. Mrs Cullano was no shooter. Instinctively Carlisle shielded Esme with his body, still inside her. Esme couldn’t hold back a moan at his movement.

“You’re dead, Platt,” Mrs Cullano hissed, her finger on the trigger. Her arm wasn’t steady.

“Kill her and I’ll tear your fuckin throat out.” Carlisle’s voice was low and deadly.

“And murder our baby?”

“Give it up. There ain’t no baby. And if there was, it would be Renato’s. You think I’d let you have my kids? You’re mad.”

Mrs Cullano’s face went red.

“Carlisle,” Esme said quietly. She turned Carlisle’s face back to her. “She ain’t got the guts. Fuck me. Please?” It was a move of dominance to show Mrs Cullano, an outsider, that no one would ever come between them or their love. And that Carlisle would always choose Esme no matter what. He leaned down to kiss her and moved with her.

The scream that Mrs Cullano let out haunted them both for years to come. Absolute grief and loss echoed in the kitchen, rage and delirium. When the gun went off the bullet went stray and was embedded in the wall over the stove. Without missing a beat, Esme grabbed the pizza slicer next to her and threw it with unbelievable precision. The only sound was that of the young woman’s body collapsing onto the floor, the round blade with a handle in the shape of a Harley-Davidson buried deep into her forehead. Instant death. Blood poured from the wound. Esme felt relief and pride wash over her.

“Fuck,” Carlisle gasped, moving faster. He kissed her hard and gripped her hips and then rested their sweaty foreheads together. “That was so fucking hot. Marry me, Es? Marry me, please!”

Esme moaned and nodded, clutching his back to stop her from losing herself completely. They were both close, both more turned on by exacting revenge than they could handle. “Yes! Yes, Carl, I’ll marry you!”

After they had finished and set their clothes right, Esme stood over the dead Mrs Cullano’s body. “Jesus Christ, what a fuckin mess. This blood is gonna take ages to clean, look, it’s gone all under the cupboards! Ugh. I don’t have the energy.”

“What should we do with her?”

“I dunno. She’s your fuckin wife.”

“Was. She’s no one’s wife now, she’s fuckin dead.”

“Well, yeah. Hey, d’ya mean what you said? To marry ya?”

“Yeah. Did you really mean you would?”

Esme stepped over the body and made sure not to get blood on her Jimmy Choos. “Yeah. I wanna be your wife.”

Neither of them smiled, but they shared a long gaze. Then Carlisle pulled out his phone and quickly dialled a number. “Hey, it’s me. Get some of your guys down the pizzeria, we need some clearing up done. Yeah. Mhm. Three or four. Yeah. Platt’s with me. Ha! Yeah. Yeah, the Mrs found us. Esme put her down, though, so we need it sorted. Clean-up and removal, remember this is a working kitchen, alright? I want it clean of evidence and up to code, ya goddit? Okay. See ya in twenty.”

Esme opened one of the cleaning cupboards and pulled out a spray and cloth.

“Hey, don’t worry about that,” Carlisle told her and he waved a hand. “They’ll be here soon for her.”

Esme looked pointedly at the counter where he had fucked her and grinned. “I was thinking more about cleaning that up. Don’t want extra flavour in the pizza tomorrow, do ya?” Bending over, she sprayed the wet area on the metal countertop. With great satisfaction she felt him press against her backside and stroke up her back. “Ready for round two already?”

“You fuckin bet. D’you know how much it turned me on to see you like that?”

“Yeah. But save it. Let’s not have our first time as an engaged couple be in front of your dead wife. Bring’s a whole new meaning to ‘the body’s not even cold’, don’t it?”

Grinning, Carlisle kissed her back. “Or when she told me she’d let me keep you ‘over her dead body’, huh? Joke’s on her.”

Esme wiped the counter down thoroughly and threw the cloth in the nearby bin. She turned and loosely wrapped her arms around his neck. “Ain’t no one tell the Surgeon what he can and cannot do.

“Nah, no one. No one but his Heart.”

#the cullanos #sex cw //////#ellie writes #notquitetwilight #CAN YOU BELIEVE #THIS IS WHERE WE ARE AT THIS POINT #there r a few things mentioned here that will be expanded on in future instalments gfhdjgkfdh #anyway like juliet said we need the vaccine

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