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#I should clean the dishes and the bathroom and wash some stuff
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Going to bite someone because I thought my sleep medicine would be here by now, thus not taking the zquill with me when I left my parent’s house. IT HAS NOT BEEN DELIVERED YET!!! All the fucking medical system being so complicated to the point where I only just got it refilled Friday BUT I HAVEN’T GOTTEN IT IN THE MAIL! Zquill was supposed to be a temporary solution for the weekend and I don’t prefer taking it to taking my prescription medication. The prescription makes me drowsy and sleepy while making a dent in my anxiety that is handled by a different medication during the day (one that doesn’t make me sleepy) and I was taking zquill as a last resort. Ugh, I hate how I always feel drowsy all day after taking it before bed. My prescription doesn’t do that, AND it shuts up the scared voices a bit and lets me keep my heart rate normal to go to sleep. I’m so fucking tired and drowsy. I need to clean but I can barely make myself move. I know therapy takes a lot of my energy but I’m so tired and I NEED to clean today and tomorrow. I have more stuff going on this weekend and I can’t miss it. Biting the medical system. Biting it biting it biting it! And I still have a nurse visit today. Maybe if I napped afterwards I could check the mail again and clean things up a bit. Im not actually sure when the mail gets delivered 🤔
#emma posts#none of my doctors are bad but all these hoops to jump through when refilling the prescriptions#ugh#the doctor that prescribed my sleep medicine wasn’t able to be reached by the pharmacy#and the prescription was expired so I need another one#so they asked my normal doctor if she could prescribe it#I don’t know what exactly happened from there but there was jumping around between two doctors one nurse and the pharmacy#I’m actually feeling bad for my pharmacy now#even though the mail never seems to be delivered on time#I should clean the dishes and the bathroom and wash some stuff#dust more#tell the apartment about the burnt out lightbulbs#why is just managing my mental and neurological issues so hard and exhausting?#some people are out there having full time jobs with these things and I don’t even work every week#I need money and insurance from the state and while I know it’s nothing to be ashamed of#it doesn’t change the fact that people have talked about people. abusing the system’#and ‘freeloading off the government and their tax dollars’#and they don’t even directly address me. yet their words dig in there#I don’t feel. ‘disabled enough’ and I have the voices of those people at the back of my head#yet I don’t think that when I’m around OTHER people who use these services#I’m like yeah. it’s fucking hard to live like this in our society#but it’s so much harder to stop thinking that about myself when I KNOW people think I’m okay enough to handle myself#logically I know I’ve only made it this far because I had assistance and I’m lucky to get what I do#but it’s still there aimed at myself because I feel like I’m somehow too functional for these services#I’ve seen what happens if I don’t get them. I crash and fall apart. but the words won’t go AWAY from my thoughts about myself#I’m way off track now. oops#after the nurse I am definitely trying a nap so I can maybe handle more of the stuff I need to do#I want disability services to be more accessible and available. I know what it’s like without them and I know people who have a harder time#than I do. and some who function a bit easier. but they all should get the help they need!!#so why can’t I think that about myself?
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furiousgoldfish · 3 months
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Survival skills: Cleaning, Laundry, Living space maintenance
(there's a separate post about cooking, here's a LINK)
So I will assume you're too tired and sick to clean, and in this case we're just trying to prevent actual incidents happening: do not leave food, especially food containing meat or animal products, laying around, because it will cause bacteria and maggots to occur, you don't want that in your home, dispose of them (you can flush bad food in the toilet to get rid, if you don't take out the trash every other day).
In the same vein, sadly dishes sometimes need to get done, if you don't want very odd smells of decomposing food in your kitchen, but it's like, do it once a week in winter, twice a week in summer, and you'll be okay. (High temperature decomposes food quicker). Dishes usually are the most time-consuming cleaning activity because it's something that needs to be done pretty often and it's annoying. You can do it with gloves if you don't like the sensory feeling of it. The absolute easiest way to get it done is to rinse everything as soon as you're done using it, before It gets gross, but do I do that? No. I would never. But it is recommended.
If cleaning is overwhelming, exhausting and just triggering for you, I encourage you to only do whatever is easiest, or even just doing one little area and having that clean and easy to use, without looking at the rest; we're just trying to survive here, not be perfect. No cleaning needs to be perfect, it just has to be done.
Okay, but if you want to have the actual knowledge of how to clean things easily, here's what I do:
Kitchen: I will go against rules and start with sweeping the floors, because I hate walking on messy floor, and having the floor clean already makes the room looks way better, so I don't mind sweeping it once again later. If I have cluttered all the surfaces (which does happen a lot), I will grab all of the things and put them in one spot, like on the table, or the floor, or anywhere just to have all surfaces clean. If there's something dried, grimy or awful happening on the surfaces, the best way to deal with it is to grab a sponge with some soapy detergent, run over the grime, and then leave that to soak 10-20 minutes. Once the dirty part is softened, you can run a wet sponge over it again and it comes out no problem, generally anything you need to clean and it's difficult, leaving it to soak will resolve your issue easily.
So once I've removed all of the things, soaked all the surfaces in soapy water, rinsed them with a sponge, I'll run a dry cloth over it to remove the last of the water, and the surfaces are super clean then. At this point I'll put a cloth on one surface, slowly pick up dish by dish and bring it to the sink and wash it. If the sink is full when I'm starting to wash, it's overwhelming. If I'm bringing in things in one by one, it feels easy, I'm just washing one thing. Once I've washed a dish, I put it on the cloth to dry. Once I'm done with all of the dishes, the pile of stuff I've compiled is usually almost empty, if there's something left like ingredients, decorations, or whatever else, I'll put it back where it belongs. I'll wash the sink and the stove top, when they're also completely free of stuff, and at the end sweep the floor again and wash it. And the kitchen is done!
Bathrooms usually need something acidic for cleaning, you either need a specific bathroom cleaner, or some vinegar (optionally with baking soda). This is because water leaves a lot of calcification on the surfaces, and acidic stuff melts calcium! It takes a while, so like before, it's best to put away all of the things that are stuck in the bathroom, use a sponge to cover everything in bathroom cleaner mixed with water, or just vinegar, leave it for 20 minutes to soak. After that, you should be able to rinse it off, or maybe scrub a little in some places where calcium is a bit heavy, and you should have a clean bathroom.
If you're cleaning a wooden floor, the best way to go about it, is to have a bucket of water, with some floor-cleaning product, few spoons of it mixed with water, and a cloth you can drop in it. Wooden floors can easily get water damage, so you do not want to have them wet for more than few minutes! You squeeze the water out of that cloth as good as you can, and then you can attach it to some squeegee or a broom or whatever you have, (if you don't have a floor cleaning tool) and slide it over the floor to clean it. It should take a few minutes to dry and then you have a clean floor!
If you have a very dirty floor, and it's not wood, but like tiles or something that doesn't get damaged with water, the easiest way to get it cleaned is to put very wet cloth over it, and to soak it a lot. I will not squeeze the water out at all if I'm deep-cleaning tiles, I'll let it all get super wet. Then, you rinse your cloth, squeeze it maximally so it's near dry, and start collecting the dirty water with it. This way, all of the dirt will get melted in water, the floor will be covered with dirty water, and you're collecting that dirty water and taking it away! It's better than just sliding, because sliding in a very dirty area will just mix the dirt, not remove it. You keep rinsing and squeezing your cloth to near-dryness, until you've collected all of the water in it, and then it should be clean or nearly-clean, you can still slide over it in a normal way with a cloth if you want perfect.
Cleaning in general, has no clear rules, you can do it your own way, however you want, with whatever you want. It's recommended to start at the top, clean top shells first and go down from there, do the floor last, but you don't have to listen, clean how it fits you. If you want more tips and really useful information on how to clean hard-to-clean surfaces, go see 'auriikatarina' on youtube, she's a professional cleaner and will make cleaning look both easy and satisfying.
Organizing: When you're organizing your stuff, the easiest way to make everything look neat is to stack things upright, and do it so everything in one category is put together (your books in one place, pencils in another, clothing is in the third spot, your sanitary products in another spot), and line it up so the tallest stuff is in the back, and shortest stuff at the front. In this way you can look at your stuff and immediately see everything, nothing is hidden from view. If you can find cool places in your home to store things from specific category, it will be the easiest to find each time. You want to be able to see everything without rummaging trough it, or attempting to remember where things are, it should be logical. If you can't categorize your stuff, or can't figure out how to organize it, think about how it would be organized in a store, and where would they put it – this helps figure out the logical category and way to store it.
Maintaining your living space
Things break sometimes, or get clogged, and if you watch out periodically for these things, you can prevent a lot of it! If you make sure never to let food get inside of your sink, and have the little plastic things in your bathtub that stops the big pieces from getting in your drain, you can prevent a lot of clogging. Kitchen and bathroom sink have a part underneath that can be dismantled (unscrewed) and you can see if there's any dirt or hair in it, and clear it out, to prevent potential clogging. If you can tell the water is draining very slowly in your sinks or your bathhub, there are drain unclogging products that you can buy, and just pour down your drain in order to clean it, before it gets actually clogged! I do this every time when I feel it's draining slow, and it prevented actual clogging for years now.
It's customary to clean all of the windows in your house, and wash the curtains in your washing machine, at least once a year, twice if you want to be super attentive to it, and this will actually improve the quality of air in your space. Yearly deep cleaning, when you move all the furniture and get to all of the dust, grime and spiderwebs stuck in there, will also improve the air quality, because all of that dust is constantly circulating in the air you breathe and it makes a noticeable difference to clean it.
Airing out the rooms should happen daily, even when it's winter it's good to air the space even for a few minutes, it will improve the amount of oxygen you have in your living space and prevent bad smells from happening. Sometimes you should take a clean broom or cloth and wipe the grime from your ceiling and walls, I rarely do this, but like if you see unattended spiderwebs in there, it will make a difference if you remove those (live spiders can stay, they take care of the flies).
Walls of your living space should be repainted, I think every 5-10 years? I think people have different preferences, I'm okay with walls getting slightly dirty. Usually the kitchen will be the worst because the walls absorb all the fumes from cooking. And, any place you have heating, radiators and such, it will darken the walls. This is normal and happens to everyone.
If you have mold anywhere, that needs to be tended to immediately, there's products for destroying the mold, you should not let that linger on the walls, and it means that either your place is not well protected from the outside wetness, or that you need better air circulation in that space. Do not just repaint it either, mold is poisonous and it grows, wetness and dampness helps it spread, dryness, fire, good dry air circulation kills it. If you have mold in your bathroom, like at the edges of your bathtub, you can destroy it by soaking patches of toilet paper with bleach, covering the mold with that toilet paper, and leaving it like that overnight. Some people say it works with vinegar too, but I haven't tried that. Don't spend time in bleach-soaked bathroom though! Get out of there, bleach fumes are not good for you. And don't mix any, ANY cleaning products together, especially not with bleach, you can create poisonous fumes, and they can gas you.
Carpets should be cleaned once a year, usually they're scrubbed with water and some carpet-cleaning product, in the old times we used just plain soap! There's now dry carpet cleaners too so you can try that as well if you don't feel like washing the entire thing by hand.
Laundry
So every washing machine works differently, but the basics are the same: you can pick a program and temperature, and click start. I have one dial with numbers of different programs, and it's like 'cotton, polyester, whites, quick wash, eco wash, colored' and I don't know what the difference is, I think whatever program you choose, the stuff will get washed, it's a washing machine, it will just take a different amount of time.
The basics of using it are: you put the clothing in, you close it. You open the little compartment by the top, which offers you a place to put detergent, and fabric softener. You can be okay without fabric softener. You figure out where to put the detergent, and put whatever amount you feel is necessary. You close that compartment. You click start. The washing machine starts working and tumbling your clothing around with water and detergent. It takes an hour, sometimes more. After it's done, you can easily open the door to your clothing. The clothing is wet and clean, you take it out, you put it up to dry.
What is important to know, is that if you put colored clothing in a high-temperature wash, it's likely to bleed color, and sometimes this color can attach to your other clothing, so if you accidentally put one red sock with your white stuff, and put it to wash oh a high temperature, you might color all your white stuff into pale red or pink. Which is fun and nothing to feel bad about, except if you really need all that stuff to stay white.
Colored stuff is usually washed on lower temperatures, it can even be washed cold, so from 0-60 is okay. It's recommended to wash winter stuff with other winter stuff, and light summer fabrics with other light fabrics, just because heavy fabrics will usually pull in more water and detergent, so your light fabrics might get neglected. There's different detergents for colored and white stuff, and I usually ignore that too because both can wash both stuff.
White stuff needs to be washed on higher temperatures sometimes, especially your undergarments because they take in a lot of sweat and stuff, and can get less white if you never put them in boiling temperatures. It's normal to put them on 90 degrees. However! Don't ever put super stretchy fabric on high temperatures, because if it has a lot of elastine in it, which is plastic, it can melt! I accidentally destroyed a white hat by putting it in with whites, it was no longer stretchy because all of the stretchy stuff got completely melted in hot water.
I don't have a dryer, so I cannot help you there, usually after the clothes is washed I'll put it on a clothing line, it dries the best in the sun, but will dry anywhere (except exposed to rain, you need to not put it in rain).
If your washing machine starts smelling odd, it's possible that some mold or bacteria is happening in there, and you can disinfect it and clean it by putting a lot of baking soda inside, and then pouring vinegar into the detergent slot. You put the washing machine to a quick wash, with hot water, and this should resolve the issue. Also if you leave wet clothing in there without taking it out and drying it, for more than 24 hours, it is going to develop mold for sure, and this can actually ruin your clothing (I had it happen to a few garments, they got black stains, it's not nice).
If you don't have a washing machine, you can still hand-wash your stuff. Putting it into a bucket with some warm water and detergent, rubbing it together, rinsing and squeezing the water out a few times, and then rinsing in clean water until only clean water is getting out of it – that can work just fine. Sometimes if you need just one garment clean and don't want to use the machine, it's best to just hand-wash it. If your clothes are basically clean but just a little sweaty, rinsing it a few times in water and detergent will make them nice again. If you have some hardcore stains that cannot be washed out even with a washing machine, there's products likes spot-cleaner, and bleach, to help you with that. However you can never use bleach on colored clothing, because it will make very ugly stains on it, bleach is only for pure whites!
Alright this is all I can immediately think of, I probably left some things out, and if anyone wants to add to this, or correct me or anything feel free! I hope this helped you feel less overwhelmed, and more informed about how to successfully live independently. Also if there's questions you want to ask go ahead! This knowledge can be hard to get by if nobody had ever taught you.
Also, this is not something you learn all at once, just from reading one post. You don't need to immediately absorb all of this knowledge, or know how to do it all at once. This is stuff that is learned over months and years or living alone and figuring it out, and none of it is difficult or impossible to do. There's no punishments for doing it wrong, maybe some annoying dealing with some stuff. Nobody should shame you if you don't know all of this, I knew none of it when I started living on my own. I learned it a bit of here and there, and I'm compiling it so it would be more accessible, but none of it needs to be followed directly or done perfectly, and you can ignore some of it completely.
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elisysd · 1 year
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hi! could i please request some comfort charles? like you’re sick or feeling down and he’s just the best boyfriend ever and helps you through it? thank you so much 🧡
Thank you for your request and sorry for the little delay! Hope you'll like it! Requests are open. I'm not guarantee you to be fast tho 😅
Tissues and Pit stops
You couldn’t be sick for Charles’ home Grand Prix. You just couldn’t be. You did not know how you managed to get the flu right before Monaco’s race but here you were, in bed a box of tissues next to you and medicine to help you get rid of the headache.
You had not said anything to Charles. You did not want him to worry, he did not need that. You were not proud to admit it, but you lied to your boyfriend when he asked you if you would come to the paddock for qualifying. You pretended to have some work to catch up on, but you still would be keeping an eye on the TV and cheering him on from the window. On the other hand, you did not manage to find a good excuse to miss his race. That’s why today you would keep things slow. Bed rest, soup, and medicine and hopefully, you were praying for it, on Sunday you would be fine for the race.
But what you did not plan was for Charles to show up upset at your door after the qualifying session. Ferrari had, once again, found a new way to mess with his home Grand Prix. When you opened the door to let him in, completely caught off guard by his presence, he immediately noticed that something was wrong.
Your flat was a mess which was unusual. You were always so put together, so organised. The opposite to Charles. So, seeing cluttery everywhere and abandoned dirty plates in the sink of the kitchen surprised him to say the least.
“Babe… are you okay?” he asked carefully while looking around.
“Me? Perfectly fine. Never been this good.” You tried to persuade him while trying to suppress a sneeze. “I should ask you the question, I heard about the penalty.”
“Yeah… well it is what it is. I can’t do anything about it. I’ll try to have a good race tomorrow, but I don’t expect anything from it. I just needed to see you and hold you.”
He made a move to take you in his arms, but you skilfully avoided him, pretending to pick up something that was laying on the floor.
“I’m not sure it’s a good idea… you must have so many things to do. Like meetings and people to talk to. I don’t want to stay in your way. And you must be tired. You should sleep it’s important.”
“Y/N are you sure you okay, you are acting weird.” He was starting to worry.
“What do you mean? I’m…me. My usual self.”
“No, you’re not. What are you hiding? Why is your flat a mess?”
“I told you; I caught up with some important paperwork and I just did not have time to clean.”
“I know my girlfriend and I know there is no way she would let her flat be this messy.”
His eyes scanned a room trying to find a clue that could explain his girlfriend’s strange behaviour. And then his gaze landed on the sofa where a used tissue and a stuffed animal he knew well from giving it to you on your first anniversary as a couple were lying around. As he approached, he noticed a heating bottle and a thermometer under a cushion. He did not need more to understand the matter.
“How long have you been sick?” he asked.
“It started this morning… I woke up with fever. That’s why I did not want to see you today… I don’t want you to get whatever I caught. I would feel bad.” You confessed.
“Baby, you will always be one of my biggest priorities. I want you to tell me these kinds of things.”
“I did not want you to worry…”  
Without a word he took care of the stuff that was laying around in the living room before washing the dishes. When the flat looked cleaner, he took a blanket from your bedroom as well as your computer and installed them on the sofa and coffee table. He then went into the bathroom to prepare you a hot bath with some lavender in it to help you relax. Without asking for anything in return, he took care of you, washing your hair with your favourite shampoo and massaging your shoulders and back that were aching from the fever.
He then helped you get comfortable and once back in the living room he wrapped you in a big and fluffy blanket before making you both some chamomile tea. He pressed you against his chest while setting up your favourite movie, his hand tracing patterns on your skin and his lips absent-mindedly resting on the top of your head.
“Charles, I appreciate what you did, really but you should not be here. What if you got sick?”
“Then we will be sick together and honestly I don’t mind it.”
And indeed, a few days later, Charles was stuck in bed with the same flu that you had a few days prior. And just like him, you spent the day taking care of him. After all, you both did promise to one another to always stick around when things would get rough. You were each other’s rock, there in the good as well as in the bad moments. Forever and always.
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moochalove · 10 months
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Last Nights Mistakes and New Beginnings (Pt. 2)
(yandere!kazuha x pregnant!reader x scaramouche)
Another part finished!!! This kinda scratches my brain but i need more…. so expect a part 3….
i got into some darker themes and I intend to keep them around so please be warned.
word count: idk but it’s pretty long 🗣️
not proofread 😋
TW: panic attacks, yandere themes, implied noncon but nothing detailed
Rolling over to stretch you notice the sun seeping through your curtains. Ah, that’s right, he’s still here. Well you suppose it wouldn’t hurt to drop him off wherever he needed to be, then come back and sleep some more. With one last stretch you stumble out of bed, heading to the living room you notice Scara curled up with the blankets surrounding him. He even sleeps weirdly….. You stop and think for a moment, should you wake him up? Or should you just let him sleep longer…
“It’s not nice to stare, Y/n.”
Cutoff from your thoughts you take a few steps back, eyes settling back down onto his now awake figure. “S-sorry, I was just trying to figure out whether to wake you or not- I…” Rubbing his eyes he throws the blankets off of himself. “Yeah yeah, save it.”
And you thought you were cranky when woken up early, huh.
“I’ll give you some time to get ready.” Turning on your heel you walk back to your personal bathroom wanting to wash up quickly, “By the way, hope you slept well.” You weren’t sure why you were inclined to say that. Shrugging it off you leave him to gather his stuff. Scara, on the other hand was taken aback by the comment. Was he a flustered? Maybe. Surprised? Definitely. Was he gonna reciprocate the act somehow? Hell no, it’s not like he owes you anything! Nope, nothing at all! Huffing he folds up the blanket before placing it back in the basket.
While reaching down he notices a funny looking book, “How to prepare for motherhood!” Did your sister leave it here? He was curious to ask you more questions but it definitely wasn’t his place. Shrugging he ignores it and tosses the somewhat neatly folded blanket onto the book.
Coming out of the bathroom your face was freshly clean, teeth: brushed, hair: combed, contacts in if needed. You were dressed casually, but still wearing a baggy shirt so no one would notice your baby bump. Grabbing your keys you jangle them around before teasing, “let’s go drop the baby off~!” “Ugh, as if!” his face is slightly red and churned. He combs his hand through his hair- you are reminded of a certain someone by this singular action.
Staring at him your mind floods back positively bad feelings. The way he treated you oh so gently, like a porcelain doll that would crack under too much pressure. And the way he pleased you like a lover should. As if he’d been a starving man and you, his first meal- but it seems you were just a side dish- an appetizer before the real meal he could ravish any other day.
Scaramouche stared back at you a little distraught, “Oh my g- What is it now? You look like a deer in headlights.” He’s already poking your face and shaking you slightly.
Your mind is retelling you the events of that night at a pace you can’t even comprehend. The tight feeling in the head that hurts so much yet feels hollow and empty is telling you something’s wrong but you haven’t been caught up to speed yet-
“Hey, this isn’t funny! What’s wrong?” he sounds genuinely concerned.
Once your mind starts running at a pace you can’t imagine, it starts linking certain events of your life together like it’s some tragic movie. A horrible one at that.
Scara is shaking you now he’s practically begging you to snap out of it. Oh, how you would laugh at the way he’s begging, the way he’s actually concerned. You wouldn’t think someone like him had it in him.
By the time you regain consciousness you’re lying on the couch with an ice pack on your head with a straw attached to a bottle of water. Trying to move and get up at the sudden reminder that you were supposed to drop Scara off you shoot up only for your head to pound in return, “Ow… what the f-“ this action causes you to lay back down.
Scara is practically inches away from you, eyes wide with relief and a small smile plastered on his dumb looking face. “You’re awake! I was sooooo- um..” he quickly backs off with a sigh, “I was just getting tired of being here, was just about to call someone to come pick me up. But it seems sleeping beauty has finally woken up!”
“What the hell happened?” you reach to hold your head, slowly recounting the events that led up to a blank space in your mind. Your face scrunches up, realizing you had a panic attack in front of Scaramouche…. You contemplated on telling him the truth of making up some random bullshit. Both of you look like you’re about to say something, “So-“ “I’m-“, with a small chuckle of you both wait to see who will speak first.
“I just wanted to say that i’m.. I’m sorry for whatever that was earlier. I don’t know what came over me. Perhaps I didn’t get enough sleep.” Your words trail off and your ears start to feel a little warm. “It’s okay, Y/n, I-I was worried about you, you know?” Scaramouche trailed his last words, looking off at some painting you have hanging up on your wall, “Anyways… I’m not too sure what happened with you but it’s none of my business so don’t try n explain yourself because I really don’t care ,” you could only feel a little guilty and embarrassed but you nodded along, “Let’s go grab some dinner.” Huh? Why did he wanna get dinner? Perhaps he felt bad about what he said? Oh well, it’s free food! Surely you would need to replenish all your engere after this whole ordeal. Plus, you needed to stay healthy so the growing life within you can stay alive and healthy.
You’re hit with a sudden realization that you’re not wearing an oversized shirt or sweater of some sort. Had he removed it in attempt to see if there was something physically wrong? Like a wound of some sort? Okay- maybe if you get up slow enough he surely won’t notice? right? RIGHT? Just act natural- slow and steady does it! Or do you just look awkward slowly rising? Hit with a sudden way of embarrassment you shoot up before turning to run to your room to change, “O-oh no…. I forgot my phone… in my room… haha… i’ll be back….!” slamming the door behind you you’re sliding the oversized hoodie on and grabbing your phone then putting some casual slip-ons. When you walk out you notice the previous hoodie folded up to where you were laid.
“O-okay! let’s go!” He can tell you’re still frazzled just by the way you’re so inconsistent with your actions and moods. Maybe it was just “that time of the month” for you. Scara knows how scary women can become during that time. It’s best if he just ignores it and goes along like nothings wrong, lest you end up berating him like his sister did that one time.
The car ride was silent, only asking where he wanted to eat and some small talk.
When your food comes out, piping hot and steaming, you’re fighting the urge to cool it the best you can before shoving it in your mouth, very well knowing that choice would result in a burnt tongue, and the roof of your mouth scorched. Scaramouche on the other hand- he’s taking his time cutting the food up into nice bite-sized pieces, although you see he’s also fighting the urge to scarf down uncut meat that’s laid on his plate. You both hadn’t eaten all day after all so of course you’re making an excessive amount of noise with exaggerated huffs and puffs, blowing your food cold. The way you’re both chugging your drinks down. I’m sure you would both regret ordering the amount of drinks you did when the bill is shown.
Both of you stare at each other while the bill sits in the middle of the pile of plates that would soon be taken away.
“Well, I take this is your treat? Of course for making me stay longer than I wanted to-“ before he can finish you’re cutting him off with a overdramatic voice, “Oh thank you! I’m so relieved knowing that you are paying tonight!” He can only scoff, he’s using an unopened straw and pushing towards you. Your face churns as you can practically feel your hairs popping out but you still put on a cocky smile, “I’m sure you’re well aware of what you just did? Whoever comes in contact with the bill must pay-“ “IT WASNT DIRECT CONTACT!” With another overdramatized action you’re pulling out your wallet with a slight ‘sigh’. All the while Scara is watching joyfully.
On the way back to the car you get a phone call.
Maybe it was a work related issue? Not wanting to risk it being an important call you answered it.
What happened next you could’ve never anticipated would happen.
All you really remember was that the call consisted of Kazuha, who was clearly drunk, and busying himself with a woman as you could hear giggles, moans and whimpers coming from himself and the other participant. He claimed you left with Scaramouche and he was still with you. Claiming how he must’ve left with you, since he went missing after you both got kicked out, and how he never came back to their shared apartment. The way he kept reiterating that he “wasn’t upset, just disappointed” I mean, he wasn’t wrong- you did leave with him but it’s not like you guys did anything? It scared you a bit how controlling he was trying to be even though you weren’t even in a relationship with him. The last thing he said before he hung up was that he would be over soon and that he didn’t want to hear any excuses. It scared you even more how he kept his calm and collected demeanor up. If it weren’t for the context you’re sure you’d be excited to see him.
Scaramouche is already waiting in the car, growing impatient by the second. Once you sit down your mind starts to slowly pick up the pace. What do you do? He said he would be there soon? How soon? Was he just planning to talk it out? Was he worried about his friend? Should you be honest? What if- A hand placed on your shoulder snaps you from thoughts. “Knock it off. You’re doing that thing again.” Hah, it was obvious that you were freaking out. Taking a deep breath you start to explain the situation. By the time you get halfway through explaining Scara is urging you to drop him off at his house and for you to get home and lock up, or go to a friends house.
The car ride was… something to say the least…. Speeding when nobody was around then acting like normal law-abiding citizens the next second.
Tires screech loudly from when you slammed on the brakes. Scara practically went flying and hit the window. He’s unbuckling the once neglected seatbelt, before he you exchange numbers in case anything happens, like if he needs to contact the authorities if you can’t. Stumbling to the backyard to sneak in. You, on the other hand, you’re speeding back home on the back roads. You had planned on parking inside the garage and locking up. From what Scara had told you, every now and then Kazuha will get absolutely wasted and make the worst decisions possible.
Also mentioning that ever since his friend’s death he’s been a lot more controlling of certain people. Like apparently one time he was so invested in the woman he was practically bat-shit-crazy over her, tracking her every move, monitoring who she spoke with, what she wore, and even some of her actions. Once she had enough and wanted a break from him he let her go, surprisingly he let her go, but soon after she was allegedly admitted to a mental hospital. Surely these are just rumors, right? There’s no way that someone like sweet and caring Kazuha would actually be like this? Right?
Once you’re parked you’re heading inside and locking everything up. One thing you should’ve did was let a friend know of the situation but it totally slipped your mind.
You decide to wait it out in your room. Laying on your back and gently rubbing your stomach, “It’s okay. Mommy is gonna be okay. So please, don’t worry..” Your skin is stretching every day, it’s an uncomfortable process but a needed change. It’s not like anyone was gonna see your body again after this. Nope, the one time you drop the “strong independent young woman destined to be the next ceo act” you end up pregnant, and the father also happens to be a sleazy alcoholic who was also crazy.
You could feel the sorrow in your heart. Eventually, you would have to tell your child that he shouldn’t be the kind of man his father was. Well, that can be something you worry about in the far distant future, for now you just gotta keep him alive and well.
There’s a gentle knock at the door.
You just have to wait it out.
It turns louder, more impatient.
It’s now a loud pounding. You can hear your name being called gently despite the knock being the opposite.
It stopped. Maybe he’s finally regained his composure and is willing to give up. Huh? Is the door know rattling? Really? Is he really trying to do what you think he’s doing? Crap. You don’t have enough time to hide.
Once the door swings open you’re locking your bedroom door and reach for your phone. Hell. you need help. Oh god. He’s already at the door, rattling the door handle and banging on the door. You’ve barely opened the keypad. You’re frantically tapping the screen.
Once the call goes through you feel as if you’ve been saved! Surely they’ll come help!
A hand is placed over your mouth firmly, “Ah, i’m so sorry, it seems my girlfriend’s sister dialed this number! Yes. I assure you everything is alright! No, no need to send someone over. I understand, we’ll give her a thorough talking. Thank you.”
Once you hear the call end your blood runs cold. You want to scream and make a break for the door but you’re not sure if you can make it.
Kazuha lets out a huff before combing through his hair, “I wish you would just talk to me, Y/n. I wish you would just listen.” He tosses the phone off into some corner before he’s pushing you down on the mattress.
You try protesting to his attempts to undress you, yelling at him saying he’s drunk and that he’s being delusional. It seems to go through one ear out the other, he’s not listening. But his calm and lover-like demeanor is present all the while. He’s kissing you gently and whispering sweet nothings in your ear, he’s feeling up and down your body, squeezing whatever his hands can grab. You hate how he’s acting like he didn’t do anything wrong. You want to scream and disappear from the face of the earth, hoping to never see his face again.
Kissing your neck seems to draw you from your thoughts, “My sweet little princess, be honest with me. What did you do with him?” you gulp nervously (or is it from fear?) you reply, “After we got kicked out, I dropped him off at his moms place. I swear baby- we didn’t do anything. It’s not him I love, it’s you!” oh how you wished to rip your tongue out and scrub it clean. With a ‘tsk’ Kazuha is starting to fiddle with his pants, “I already told you to not make excuses. Please, sweetheart, just tell me what you did and i’ll forgive you.” Covering your face, hiding your eyes, threatening to spill unwanted tears you try refuting but he seems to stuck on the idea you “cheated” even though you did nothing wrong.
The rest of the night is another blurry one, but not from the alcohol, from unwanted memories. From that day on you tell yourself you’re gonna take a break from work and fly home to spend the rest of your pregnancy with your family. Sure it seemed irresponsible and you didn’t exactly have the funds for it but you’re sure once you tell your parents your situation they’ll understand and lend a helping hand.
Scaramouche on the other hand, he’s sitting in his younger self’s bedroom, everything is outdated to his likings now but some things remain to what he still enjoys. A cracked phone lays before him, wondering if he should call to see if you’re alright, perhaps the situation has changed? Biting the skin of his inner cheek he decided against it, ultimately deciding to call in a few days.
Fiddling with the cheap metal rings on his fingers his mind keeps wandering back to the idea of you. Had you really caught his interest? You? Of all people? Pfft, as if some lowly scum such as yourself could dare to invade his mind! Yet, here you are. The way you laugh, your smile, your everything. It truly captivated him.
He thinks back to how you both practically agreed to take care of your new baby, Meowmeow. Hopefully you would be able to feed her tonight. He needs to consult his mother about his new cat so he can get all the finical support he needs. Although he’s sure she’ll just flash him a dumb smile saying, “Oh, such a silly thing to want to invest in. Well, it’s not like you ask for much so i’ll be a good mom and help my son!” or at least something along those lines.
His mind also plagued him with not so happy thoughts, like the idea of you truly disliking him and pushing him away. Maybe revoking his rights to care for your stray animal and shutting him out forever. No use in worrying about it now, it’d be best to do something else for now. Even when his mind would slip in images of you here and there. Oh well, it’s not like he didn’t mind.
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topazy · 10 months
Text
Tomorrow's promise
Pairing: Shane Walsh × reader, Rick Grimes × sister reader
Warnings: Mentions of SA, blood, character death
Chapter: 2.10
Lori gave you a knowing look while Andrea continued to whine about issues that weren’t real issues. While Maggie and Beth argued in another room, Andrea stated she thought you should try to encourage Beth to accompany you while taking Jace for a walk around the farm, insisting the fresh air would do the three of you some good.
You did want to snap back at her since Andrea was unhelpful most of the time, but you bit your tongue for the most part and started washing dishes in the kitchen. It’s not until Andrea mentions your brother and Shane being sexist since they always dealt with the more dangerous tasks, leaving the women behind to do all the housework.
“It's because they were cops! They risked their lives every day, and they know what they are doing.”
Andrea lets out an over-the-top huff, placing her hands on her hips. “Well, if they spent more time teaching us how to defend ourselves properly, then maybe we could share the load. I should be able to handle my own goddamn gun.”
“Oh yeah, because you’re so good at handling them.”
Lori shakes her head. She was trying her best to defuse the tension, but neither you nor the blonde were listening at this point.
“Excuse me?”
“Last time you fired a damn gun, you almost killed Daryl!”
You step out onto the porch with a fresh cup of coffee in your hand. It wasn’t the real stuff and properly tasted stale, but it was better than nothing. You sit down beside Maggie on the wooden steps and hand it to her. “I thought you could use this.”
“Thanks.”
“How is she?”
Maggie pauses before answering, “She’s alive.”
You give her a sympathetic smile. Things had gone from bad to chaotic in the last twenty-four hours. Beth had locked herself in a bathroom, broke the mirror, and then used the sharp material to cut herself; luckily, her father was able to stitch her wrist in time. Rick and Shane had taken the kid Randell somewhere far to leave him, but apparently the area was surrounded by walkers, so they brought him back to the farm, where he was now essentially a hostage.
“Since we got here, we’ve brought nothing but trouble; I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, you do,” she says, letting out a slight chuckle. “But if I’m being honest, I’m glad you folks came here. I just wish it was under better circumstances.”
You watch as Daryl comes out of the barn covered in blood, which you assumed came from Randell. You feel physically sick thinking of what could have transpired behind those wooden walls. You tell Maggie, “I’ll be back shortly.”
You walk quickly to grab a bucket of water that was half full and a cleanish cloth that was hanging up to dry, and you call out after your friend, “Daryl, wait up.”
He keeps walking towards one of the wells. “I gotta go wipe—”
“The blood off? Yeah, I got you covered.”
He lets out a snort as he begins to wash his hands. “You just assume I’d come out covered in blood?”
“I noticed the cut on your arm earlier, and I don’t want it to get infected.”
Daryl glances down at his arms before cleaning them as well. Usually he was covered in more dirt and dried blood than the rest of you; what worried you was the uncovered cut on Daryl’s arm surrounded by dirt. He says, “You're such a mom.”
Daryl asks how your injury from the crash is healing as you make your way towards your group, which is sitting by the tents outside. The first thing you notice is the look on Shane’s face; he’s looking pissed off as his eyes dart between you and Daryl.
"Boy, there’s got a gang, thirty men,” Daryl says. “They have heavy artillery, and they ain’t looking to make friends. They roll through here; our boys are dead. And our women... they’re going to wish they were.”
Hearing those words come from Daryl, you instantly become scared. You avoid making eye contact with Shane as you walk towards him; he hands you Jace before resting his hand against your hip. He whispers, “I won’t let anything happen to you.”
Carol notices Daryl’s bleeding knuckles. “What did you do?”
“Had a little chat.”
When your brother starts to talk about ‘eliminating the threat’ you shake your head, not wanting to hear anymore, you decide to leave the conversation. “I’m going to take Jace inside.”
You didn’t doubt Randall was a bad person, and you believed you would rather wish you were dead if his gang tuned up, but you weren’t going to partake in anything to do with him.
“Can I ask you something?”
As soon as you hear Dale’s voice, you roll your eyes. You walked to the other side of the farm so you could be on your own with Jace. “I appreciate what you’re trying to do, Dale, but I’m not going to vote.”
“So you’re just going to stand by and let your brother kill the boy?”
You lean against a tree, continuing to stoke Jace’s thin, dark hair with your fingers. “My personal opinion on this doesn’t matter, but what does is keep our people safe.”
Dale looks disappointed. “So you agree with killing him; you just don’t want to admit it.”
Learning that Randall stood by and watched as men in his group raped two teenage girls in front of their father stirred something inside—emotions that you couldn’t shift. “All due respect, it’s different from us, Dale. I understand why it’s wrong, all of us against one kid, but…” You stop talking when your mouth suddenly becomes dry, and it takes you a moment to find your voice again. “I’ve met Randall’s before, and trust me, you want to be on the opposite side of them.”
Dale gives your arm a friendly squeeze and says, “I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
He licks at his lips and says, “I spoke to Shane earlier to try and convince him to change his mind.”
“I imagine that went well,” you snort.
“He was dead set on never letting a man like that near you again, and I had a theory you met men like that in the past; that’s why I’m sorry. Nobody deserves—”
“Dale,” tears fall from your eyes. “Just please, don’t go there.”
“I’m sorry if I’ve upset you. Just—they listen to you, Rick, Shane; hell, even Daryl seems to value your opinion.”
You remain standing in the same spot as the older man walks away. “Dale?” He turns back around to face you. “How long did it take you to stop trusting Shane?”
“I never did.”
You stand by the front doorway of Greene's farmhouse; everyone has gathered to talk about Randall’s fate. You had already made it clear you weren’t getting involved, a decision that received mixed reactions; some thought it was unfair, while those closest to you understood why you weren’t getting involved.
You hold your hand out for your nephew and say, “Carl, I need you to come help me in the RV.”
He pouts, “What with?”
“I need you to help watch Jace while I mend a bunch of torn-up clothes.”
“Now?”
“Go.”
Carl sulks as he walks by you to go outside. You didn’t really need his help in the RV, but you, Rick, and Lori wanted him out of the discussion.
“You’re really not going to share your thoughts on this?” Dale asks.
You glance around to make sure nobody else is listening in before answering. “Honestly, I don’t know what I think. I want to believe I’m a good person who votes against it, but then I remember what he’s done, and then I’m unsure. But I do admire you, Dale; it’s not easy. Always remember who you are.”
He gives you a slight nod, and then you leave the house.
You’re unsure of how much time has passed by when you hear a loud yell of pain. “Carl, stay here with Jace and lock the door behind me.”
You run out of the RV and in the direction of the field. Your brother calls out for T-dog to get a shotgun as he follows closely behind you.
Spotting a walker trying to bite Dale, you pull your blade out of your belt and stab it in the head before pushing it off him, but you’re too late. Dale’s stomach had already been ripped open, and he was bleeding out. “No! Rick, Rick! Help, over here!”
Daryl is the next person to arrive. He kneels down and says, “Hey, buddy, you’re going to be okay.”
Rick and Andrea both scream for Hershel to come outside as soon as they see Dale, but you knew there was nothing he could do. You hold Dale’s hand and kiss his forehead. “It’s okay; it’s going to be okay.”
Dale was so confused by the loss of blood that it was hard to know if he knew what you were saying to him. But you could tell he was in pain and choking on his own blood from the way he gurgled.
“Shane... Rick,” with glossy eyes, you look up at them, your voice breaking. “He’s suffering; please do something.”
Rick points his gun at Dale’s head, but he’s unable to pull the trigger, so Daryl takes the gun from him. You move further back as Daryl kneels down, but you still hold onto Dale’s hand, not wanting him to feel alone.
“Sorry, brother.” Daryl pulls the trigger, ending Dale’s suffering.
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durrtydawg · 11 months
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hey gorl! idk how cereal you were about headcanons, but can i request something domestic? like what the uncharted boys are like when they're at home and not treasure hunting for once? (can be as clean/dirty as you like hehe)
Hey lovely! Thanks for waiting for so long, and sorry if this isn't what you had in mind, but I've spewed some domestic Sam headcanons into my notes that I think about too often. A lot of them are very random, so if you want something more specific, please let me know 👹❤️
I started writing Nate, too, but honestly, if you want some good Nate hcs, you should ask @nathandrakeisabottom bc she's gonna have them done to a T.
[Masterlist]
Without further ado,
Domestic Sam Drake Headcanons...
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Sam likes to rotate his 'at-home wardrobe' between two pairs of ill-fitting jeans, raglan shirts, the odd henley, and a fuck tonne of minimalistic graphic tees with references that he has no clue about. Boots are abandoned for trainers. (- sneakers, for those who are anglo-challenged)
If it's cold-cold, he adds his trusty sherpa-plaid shirt combo.
If it's hot-hot, he opts for his slutty vests and perhaps some track shorts if he's feeling... frisky.
And fucking baseball caps. He wears them lots, and he wears them well. I do NOT make the rules.
Whenever the weather is good, Sam is outside working on his bike. Whether he's cleaning it, fixing it up, or just revving it for the attention, he'll be out there in aforementioned slutty little vest, cigarette hanging out of the corner of his mouth, tinkering away because he can't sit still for long at all.
When the weather isn't good, he's miserable. As soon as Winter rolls around, he contracts at least one cold a month, and whilst he gets surprisingly over dramatic about it, he also refuses to take any meds for it. Stubborn man.
Untidy- but never unclean. Being stuck in that grotty old prison for so long, it's clear that Sam wants nothing to remind him of his disgusting cell. He always cleans up after himself in terms of dirt and grime, BUT he's also become a bit of a hoarder, which also makes wherever he lives constantly untidy. Books, ugly little ornaments, and also clothes that he buys and never wears are scattered all over the place.
The idea of owning his own stuff remains seemingly overwhelming; he grows attached to whatever he gets his hands on because he's lived for so long without things of his own.
Continuing down the cleanliness route, Sam takes the longest showers you could imagine. The warmth? The privacy? They'll forever be luxuries to him that he wants to take complete advantage of.
Uses some sort of 250 in 1 body wash/shampoo/car brake fluid concoction, and is in complete refusal of the fact that he needs anything else... though once or twice his intrigue and thieving nature have gotten the better of him, and he's left the bathroom with an oddly feminine aroma that's dangerously similar to the scent of whatever it is his partner's using. Not that he'd ever use a girl's body wash.
Sam whistles around the house. A lot. Also sings quietly to himself throughout the day. He keeps it hushed, mostly, but for some reason, he thinks the shower is soundproof. Lucky for any cohabitors, he's got a pretty good set of pipes on him, and it's actually really sweet. ('We Didn't Start the Fire' by Billy Joel is one of his go-to's. He definitely brags about his ability to remember all of the words.)
He's a dab hand in the kitchen. Well. Sometimes. Sam's got a selection of about three dishes that he makes to Michelin star standard. Other than that he's fucking useless, which can be frustrating since he eats like an animal. Guys of his stature need fuel!
Many times has a frozen lasagna or a teaspoon that's been absentmindedly left in the microwave ended up almost burning the house down. Though, his mind is always in about six places at once, so you can't really blame the poor guy.
But those that he's good at? He's really good at. It's not often that he can be found in the kitchen with a tea towel strewn over his shoulder, four different pots and pans bubbling away on the stove, whilst he bops his head along to a crackly radio station, but when he is? You know you're in for a treat.
He can't scramble eggs for shit (he does it in the microwave and insists it tastes fine💀 it does not.) but can poach 'em good. Expect eggs benedict in the morning, or banana pancakes if you've got a sweet tooth. Not the type to eat brekkie? You are now.
Speaking of breakfast in bed:
Morning 👏 sex. Like... more than any other time of day. Sam wakes up with insane levels of energy in the morning, and the first two hours of his day are more productive than the other twenty-two combined. So if he's not out for a morning jog (eugh.) or busy finding out what recipe he wants to try out for breakfast, he's got it in you. End of. Perhaps you used to grumble about the time... but he's got a thing for your early-am laziness, and you've probably woken up with his head between your thighs more times than you can count. I suppose that feeds in to the somnoph1lia he's most definitely privy to.
That, of course, is not to say that he's exclusively into morning sex.
Is verrrry cuddly with partners when they're visiting or living together. Sam craves touch, so even if it's not a super committed relationship, lingering shoulder squeezes, resting his chin on your head whilst his arms are wrapped around your middle, and gentle strokes to the small of the back are staples- half the time he doesn't even realise he's doing them.
Overall, he’s one handsy bastard, and at his cockiest will take any opportunity he can to smack, squeeze, and even bite your ass if it's convenient enough, offering you nothing but a complacent grin when you try to snap at him. Best you save your moaning for the bedroom. He knows you love it.
Hear me out. He has a weird fascination with teleshopping channels. Not because he wants to buy any of it. Moreso because he enjoys criticising some of the ridiculous stuff they try to flog on there. With a mouthful of cereal, he'll be mocking whatever poor sod has a slot to sell their item, calling you to come and watch in hopes that you find it just as ludicrous as he does.
With TV in general, he has a very stereotypical 'dad' stance on it. Does the whole "what's this crap you're watching? Don't you wanna do something more productive with your day?", only to be glued to the screen within minutes, asking about characters and plot alike.
Unfortunately, this also includes Hallmark Christmas movies.
Sam loves loves LOVES 90's-00's british sitcoms (And no, that's not self-indulgent). I genuinely believe he would binge watch Father Ted and Peep Show happily, especially because he enjoys satire and absorbs the dry sense of humour like a happy sponge. He'd try to impress you with the accent too. Doesn't work.
Falls asleep on the sofa more than anywhere. Since he's often up at the crack of dawn, as soon as 5pm rolls around, he's yawning and 'resting his eyes'. That, and the fact that he finds it hard to get to sleep in bed unless he's totally fucked out. Something about being left alone with nothing but the view of the ceiling and his thoughts makes it difficult for him to switch off. Trauma, eh?
When he does sleep, though, he's precious. Definitely fidgets throughout the night, waking up all stiff because he's been in all sorts of weird positions. He doesn't snore... but he definitely mumbles in his sleep. And it's always nonsense.
Never plans a big groceries run. Sam's trips to the supermarket are solely made on an ad hoc basis, and every time he returns with something that definitely wasn't on the list, i.e. he'll go out to buy pasta but returns with a novelty kitchen timer shaped like a lemon, and a new wooden spoon because he doesn't like the turmeric stains on his current one.
Big porch dweller. Will idle away the hours smoking on his porch or balcony when he's exhausted all of his other options, and will draw little smiley faces on the railings with the burnt out end of the cigarette before throwing it away. Awh.
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Note
AITA for getting mad at my roommates?
A while ago I had to move out of my college apartment due to disagreements with the roommates. I was told I was ignoring boundaries and ignoring their stuff, cited as disagreeable in remediation meetings, and also told my disability was “not able to be accommodated” despite the fact theirs all were.
When I moved in, our roommate agreement as per signed by the university said the kitchen and the dishes within the kitchen were all communal property, and could be used by anyone with permission. It was also stated in the same agreement that responsibility for the management of personal items was one’s own responsibility, IE it was your job to inform someone else if something within the kitchen came with special instructions, or if it should not handle something that the person may be allergic to, like nuts or milk. This was a big deal at our university because someone had died a few years ago from a peanut allergy after their roommate ate peanut butter from some utensils which were not washed properly, and sued the university as a result.
I went on to take these rules as they were written, because I come from a similar culture where the kitchen is a communal space and what is in it is considered as belonging to everyone. I ended up using many of my roommates’ pots and utensils because I was poor and could not afford the same things they had, always with permission and always cleaning up after.
After a while, I ended up being informed by one of my roommates (I had 3) that I was “destroying” one of her pans because I had put it in the dishwasher and it was an “heirloom” from her grandmother. I had asked her multiple times if it was okay, and she always said yes, and the complaint was about that she had mistakenly told me yes and never intended for me to use that. She said I was destroying her property and not taking care of it, even though the pan said dishwasher safe on the bottom in extremely faded letters and i saw no signs of damage whatsoever.
Fast forward a few months, and the rest of my roommates are taking her side. One of them was someone I actually shared a bathroom with, who ended up screaming at me in a hissy fit over me having left two (2) actual literal hairs in the drain. Like not two clumps of hair, but two hairs. I cleaned up the drain every time, but she continued to yell at me for being so “dirty” and “uncivilized”, and the other roommates began joining in on this too.
Everything eventually escalated into arguments because I did not want to take what they were saying lying down. I told them very plainly what the roommate agreement was that we all signed to, and they all told me it was null and void and that they would be changing the terms of it extremely shortly. I told them that this was unfair and that the kitchen should be a common space that is shared, and not gatekept, and that they have a duty to uphold that as we all lived in the same space and managed the same things.
They called me selfish, and said I had no sense of respect for others or responsibility for my actions. Eventually they took this to the RA who told me since I signed the lease last, I would eventually have to leave if everything was not settled. We tried many mediations and many things to settle our differences, but I just kept getting called selfish for explaining where I came from and the cultural differences between me and them and they just kept calling me selfish and destructive.
Am I really the asshole here? It was the first time I’ve ever felt unsafe sharing a space with other people.
What are these acronyms?
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nats-revival · 8 months
Text
𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙗𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 / 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙩𝙝 𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙪𝙥 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙨𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙨 | 𝙚. 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙢𝙨
pairing: ellie williams x afab!black!reader
tags: told from readers pov and ellies pov, alternates between third person and first person, sorta angsty, fluff at the start, basically ur dina lol, jj isnt here tho, one use of y/n, one description of reader (just hair?? i think that’s it), ellie has ALOT of inner turmoil, reader lowkey knows that tho, great music/artists (not to toot my own horn but the songs and artists mentioned are BANGERS!!!!), sorta canon typical universe, mentions of abby and tommy (not really any actual involvement in the story.. well, sorta ig), ellie refers to reader as ‘she’, and i think thats it!!
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a/n: lowkey thinking abt making a part two but everytime i start a series i always end up stopping at the second chapter. 😭 anyways, ill get to finishing those other requests diligently! 😇🙏 also ignore the fact i added hella tags, its prolly like random stuff but just trust me bro its in here!!!
Ellie was acting weird. Like, really weird. After Tommy had come and gone, something shifted inside of her. Like he’d altered her brain chemistry in some strange way. She was much quieter and she was biting her nails — a habit she’d picked up whenever she was thinking or nervous. You stand in the kitchen cleaning up some dishes as a Lauryn Hill vinyl plays softly. Ellie didn’t know much about your music taste but god, did she love it. She loved lots of things about you, your cooking, learning about your culture, how you helped her broaden her outlook on the world with the lessons instilled into you by your parents and grandparents. It was something she valued above all else. You found yourself humming along to the tune of the music and occasionally mumbling the lyrics. The stairs creaked as she walked down them rather slowly. The sound of the record player being on made her wonder what you were up to. She picks up the sleeve the vinyl had been in and she reads it. “‘The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill’? You’re always listenin’ to this record. It must be your favorite then, I presume.”
She walked over to you while you were drying off a plate. “It’s a classic, Ellie. Who doesn’t like this album?” You ask as a small smile creeps onto your face. She’d always made you smile, but it now just seemed like she was trying to deter you from the fact that something had obviously been going on in her mind. She leans against the counter, looking over her shoulder at the setting sun. She hadn’t said anything as she alternates between looking at the sunset, you washing the dishes and nodding her head to the beat of the songs playing. Once the dishes have been washed, you rummage through the cabinets for a small candle. It was one Ellie liked. It smelled like some sweet citrus scent and the label had been rubbed off. You reach into a drawer and pull out a box of matches. You strike it until it burns and you light each wick, then putting the match out. 
   Then, you stop the record and put it back in its sleeve. “I should get you another vinyl. Who else do you listen to?” Ellie asks as she steps behind you. You shrug. “In the old world, I listened to a lot of music. I had a Walkman but yknow, someone stole it.” “That sucks. I had a Walkman aswell at some point. Never saw it again.” She pushes her hands into the pockets of her worn jeans and you nod in response. You let out a little yawn. “I think I’ll go to sleep soon.” You mumble to yourself as you turn to Ellie. “Yknow, for my birthday, you could get me like a.. New Edition one if you could find it.” You suggest with a smile. “You got it, babe. I’ll search as hard as I can.” She smiled softly and kissed your cheek. You return the kiss and begin walking up the stairs.
    You head for the bathroom to shower. The water never got as hot as you preferred but you couldn’t complain. At least you’d been getting some water. The water was lukewarm. Your clothes had been discarded on the floor. You step into the shower and your mind begins racing. You were there the entire time Tommy had been talking to Ellie. You’d opened the door to him. You watched him limp into the dining room. You let him in! You were starting to think that wasn’t a good idea as you washed your body. Ellie tended to rethink her actions and doubt herself a lot. You couldnt like, literally see inside of her mind, but you knew she had lots of inner turmoil. Killing people and the undead coupled with trauma definitely wasn’t an easy task to balance. You could see it in her. But she was addicted to that sense of justice. She felt compelled to protect the ones she loved even if it meant it was self destructive. 
   As you exited the shower, you found Ellie sitting on your shared bed awake. “Ellie, are you not tired?” You ask softly as you dress yourself. “No, well, yeah. I was just.. waitin’ for you.” You nod in response. You wore a pair of shorts and a shirt with some faded graphic that appeared to be from some Mortal Kombat game. You sat next to her and you grabbed her hand gently. Your thumb runs over her knuckles. “Yknow you can talk to me. I’ll listen, Ellie. I’m here for you.” She mumbled a soft ‘I know’ before she leaned her head against your shoulder. The moonlight shines through the windows, gently illuminating your features and Ellie’s. You could hear the windchimes outside swaying with the wind. “Cmon, let’s get some rest.” You suggested as you walked over to your side of the bed. You knew Ellie had a hard time sleeping most nights, and some days it was visible on her face. You just wanted her to sleep for one night. In a way, you knew why she couldn’t sleep. Maybe because she wanted to protect you from whatever may stumble in here while you’re in your most vulnerable state, or maybe because her self-decapitating thoughts were  eating her alive. You laid in the bed, facing Ellie as she settled in the bed. 
    In one hand held her switchblade (she went to sleep holding it most nights.) She looks at you with a tired smile as one of her hands comes up to gently caress your face. “When this is all over, ‘m gonna give you the whole goddamn world.” She mumbled as she leaned forward to give you a soft peck. “I’d do the same for you. I’d get you everything you could possibly ever want.” Moments like these were your favorite moments to have with Ellie. Her words of affirmation, love and even her promises were all you could ever think about whenever you couldn’t sleep. You knew she meant everything she said because of the sincerity in her voice. You smiled to yourself. Ellie saw you and she smiled too. You turn to her. “Ellie?” “Yeah?” “Don’t leave me. Not ever. I can’t lose you, I still have so much to show you.” There was this kind of.. expression on her face. Uncertainty. Worry. Compassion. Her response was small, as if she wasn’t sure if she’d ever abide by this unspoken promise to you. “I won’t.” You smiled softly before you got a little closer to her, holding her in your arms as you drift off into sleep. 
(Ellie’s POV now lol)
She was so close. Holding me as if she’d never let go. Thoughts were too much. My mind is racing. I keep seeing him. Tommy did something to me. I couldn’t just.. leave my girlfriend. The one who’s been with me through thick and thin. A woman like this wasn’t easy to come by, especially during an apocalypse. The moonlight was always my favorite light to see her under. She’d been glowing, god, she was beautiful, ethereal even. The way her braids sprawl over the pillow, her soft breathing, the soft thumps of her heart were all I would’ve needed in a perfect world. The draft coming through the window gave my goosebumps. We’d been laying here for a few minutes. It was amazing how fast she could fall asleep. The switchblade I hold has a reflection from the moons light. I see myself in the blades reflection. I look away.
  Something inside of me screams ‘Go get her. Go kill Abby. Finish the job like Tommy suggested.’ Slowly, I slide out of the bed. Standing in the middle of the room, I realize that there are some windows open. Shuddering, I go to close them. I made sure to keep my footsteps light so the floor didn’t creak. After closing the windows upstairs, I go into the room my art was stationed in. There was a box under my desk containing my journal. I know she never looked through it because I didn’t want her to and she respected that. I flip through the pages of it, looking back at my entries. There’s an entry in my journal. ‘Sometimes, I hear people talking. They tell me to do bad things. I know I shouldn’t. But how do I ignore a voice so loud? I should tell (Y/N). I can’t tell her. I don’t want to ruin this for her. She seems.. happier when she’s not constantly running for her life.’ The note was next to a few sketches of her and moths I’d roughly sketched. I was tired of the voices. I return the journal and walk downstairs to close the rest of the windows downstairs. I stop infront of my guitar. 
  I sit down, strumming a few cords before I stop. ‘Go get her. Go kill Abby. Kill Abby. Show her what pain feels like. She killed Joel. Finish the job.’ The voice was repeating. It was driving me insane. The voices came after we left Seattle. I want the cycle to end. Nothing ends if I just ask it to. That’s in some.. nonexistent world. My skin crawls with this need. Not the kind I feel when I look at her and her beautiful face and body. It was bloodlust. A vicious cycle never ends, that’s what makes it so vicious. This is the continuation of a cycle I can't break. “I have to do this.” I mumble. I move mindlessly as I gather my things and get ready. I have to kill Abby. I feel like my only purpose in life is to protect, sacrifice, and suffer in silence. Killing Abby seems like.. my magnum opus right now. She tells me that ‘violence isn’t the answer’ and to ‘control my urges’ but I can’t.      As I stand in the kitchen, putting the last of my things into my backpack, the stairs creak. She’s awake. Fuck. She wasn’t supposed to wake up. God, don’t look at me. Don’t do this to me, I need to do this— “Ellie? What’re you doing?” Her voice makes me freeze in place. I don’t move. I stare at her. Her tired eyes. The longing in her eyes for some sorta.. normality in her life. Our life isn’t normal and has never been normal. Was anything normal in this life? Who knows. Nobody knows. Matter of fact, I don’t know.
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yeowangies · 1 year
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Puffiness
PAIRING: Raditz/GenderNeutral!Reader RATING: Everyone CONTENTS: Little Angst, Comfort, Established relationship WARNINGS: Mentions of mental illness. WORDCOUNT: 1440
Summary:
But it was like piling up a bunch of emotions you pushed back, suddenly floating up to occupy your mind at once. 
Luckily Raditz wasn’t there to witness it.
Notes:
I meant to finish this small piece last weekend, but well, I didn't. I was feeling bad and writing things like this from my own experience is hard.
I have a love hate relationship with this kind of confessional fics. It feels good to put my own feelings into words, but on the other hand, I spend almost all the time it takes me to write it crying, but it's also a way to have catharsis, though I feel exposed, but then again-
Anyway, I don't go into anything specific about mental illness and stuff, but it's there. I also barely proof read this.
It was one of those days. You weren’t exactly sure why you’d randomly felt like that even when nothing really happened; you even woke up in a good mood. But it was like piling up a bunch of emotions you pushed back, suddenly floating up to occupy your mind at once. 
Luckily Raditz wasn’t there to witness it. While you hated that he spent so much time training with Goku, sometimes being gone for weeks and months at a time, at some point you were glad he wasn’t around much. He had rarely seen you when you were down, and if he had, he noticed enough to try and make the day easier for you (which usually just involved more kisses and attention during sex, and you appreciated it).
This time, it was different, and you were glad he wasn’t home. You’ve been on the edge of tears for half the day, and after dinner, you couldn’t help but cry a little. Or a lot. It was uncomfortable to do it, eyes puffy and stuffy nose, but it was worse to try and hold it in, so you were basically sobbing while washing the dishes. Even after taking a shower and washing your face thoroughly, you couldn’t help it, and you wonder if there even was a point in putting on night cream if you were going to keep crying your eyes out once you went to bed. 
You were startled when you heard the front door open. You could tell by the sound alone that it was Raditz. He had come home sooner than you expected. 
Trying to wipe your tears as quickly as you could, pressing your fingers to your eyes to will the puffiness away magically. He was going to notice, no matter how much you tried, but maybe the shower would have made it not so obvious. 
“Hey!” Raditz greeted you with a grin as he walked into the bedroom. 
You smiled at him from your seat by the vanity, and he didn’t even give you time to greet him back, standing by you in the blink of an eye as he leaned down to kiss you at once. You made a startled noise, returning the affection before he pulled away. 
“I wasn’t expecting you tonight.” You commented, wondering if your voice sounded even right at that moment. 
Raditz kept his smile on his face as he looked down at you but it soon flattened, and you blinked, confused. 
“You’ve been crying.” 
So it was noticeable. 
Unsure of what to say, you didn’t reply to his comment, your eyes going elsewhere to avoid his gaze. 
“Have you eaten? I can make you something quick.”
“No, I ate.” 
“You should shower before bed then, I know you must smell bad.” You said, standing up and walking past Raditz towards the bathroom to get everything ready for him. 
The frustration on his face was more than obvious when he walked into the bathroom a minute later, still keeping his eyes fixed on you until you closed the door so he could clean himself up. He must have known you weren’t angry or upset with him; you made it painfully obvious for him when you were. But he must still be confused about your sadness, and while you knew well that he wasn’t human, sometimes you forgot about it and what it implied. 
Would he even understand your heartache?
You were settled on your side of the bed when Raditz walked into the bedroom a few minutes later, completely dried and wearing only his boxers. You tried to meet his eyes for a second, taking all of him before you averted your gaze. Too much distraction to see him like that, so you turned around, facing the other side of the room as he laid on his side. 
He was close enough that you felt warmth radiating from him, but when you tried to move to turn off the lamp by your nightstand, he pressed his body to yours, his chest against your back, and sneaked a hand around your waist. Under any other circumstance, you would have relaxed into his touch, but knowing that he had seen right through you so easily, you felt more vulnerable than you would like, so you stiffened immediately. 
“Are you going to tell me why you’ve been crying?” Raditz asked softly, his face buried in your hair. “Was it me? Was I gone too long?”
“No, it’s not you.”
Sometimes it is you. 
However, you didn’t want to say it. It wasn’t his fault you felt like that, but when a haze of sadness creeped up on you, you doubted everything, even his affection. 
You remained quiet, wondering if or how you should even voice what was currently going on inside your head. Putting your emotions into words was difficult, and while it might help, you knew you were going to spill tears, even after spending the last couple of hours crying before he arrived home.
“I feel like a failure.” You finally confessed, very quietly.
“A failure?”
“Nothing I do matters.” Your voice wavered, and you tried to keep yourself together, breathing in deeply, as you spilled everything out. “It’s like never enough. But at the same time, I feel like I might explode from doing too much. Like every single emotion will break me into pieces. Everything overwhelms me and… I wish I was normal…”
It had been naive for you to think you could hold in the tears, and they ran down your nose and cheeks, wetting the pillow. It was a surprise you could still make sense while you spoke, but you didn’t know if you could speak again after that, and your heart weighed heavy on your chest when Raditz didn’t reply while you sobbed as quietly as you could.
Would he understand, though? He was a warrior, and he had faced death more times than you could count, and that had surely left scars on his body and his soul. But would he understand that your feelings had nothing to do with that kind of trauma? Surely he thought you were just being too dramatic and feeble. What has even happened in your life that you were unconsolable?
“I understand.” Raditz murmured gently against your neck. 
“You do?” You snuffled, wiping your face with your hand. 
“Yes.” He sighed, and you noticed the slight trepidation in his voice. “Our lives have not been nearly the same, but the frustration you’re describing… I know that too well.”
You pondered on his words for a moment before he urged you to turn to him. Reluctantly, you rolled over, wiping the rest of your tears away as you faced him, carefully lifting your eyes to meet his. 
Raditz had shown sides of him you never even imagined during the time he had spent with you; he had shown kindness and empathy and even silliness. The softness he had in his eyes then, however, you wanted to engrave it in your mind forever. 
He didn’t say anything at all, only looked into your eyes for an instant before holding you as close as he possibly could. You buried your face in his chest willingly, wrapping your arms around his waist as tears began to spill once again. It was still embarrassing to cry in front of him, but the strong hold he had on you, one hand patting your head, the other resting on your waist made you feel secure, more secure than you ever felt. And it shattered you; if there was even a wall left to keep you intact, his arms around you had made it come down, and all you could do was weep. 
There was only a certain amount of tears left to cry after spending half the day lamenting to yourself, so you calmed down after a couple of minutes, pulling away only a little to once again wipe your tears, realizing you had wet his chest (and the sheets). 
“I’m sorry.” You sobbed, moving your head to nuzzle his neck. 
“You have nothing to be sorry for.”
Raditz buried his face in the crook of your neck, dragging his nose along your jaw. That was usually an erotic gesture; he did it before initiating sex. But this time he only held you close, keeping a firm grip on your body, as if you were going to slip away at any chance. 
You wouldn’t, obviously. An entire new feeling overwhelmed you, even making tears well up again, but you didn’t feel like bawling anymore. Just being there, in his embrace, was enough to feel safe. 
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just-imagine-bleach · 2 years
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Hello, I hope you are having a nice day! Can I request a Toshiro Hitsugaya x fem reader scenario with the reader being 4 months pregnant with his son? I don't know if you do pregnant smut, but if you do, can you write it soft and romantic and really intimate. Should you not write pregnant smut, then I would request only the pregnancy scenario? Maybe Toshiro's reaction to his son's small movements? It would be a wish come true!
Hey there! I’m so sorry this took so long, but I hope you enjoy it! I don't mind Pregnancy stuff in general! I get baby fever, so these asks help me cope. (also Tokophobic friends, if you see this, let me know if there are more tags I can add to help keep this post out of safe spaces :) thanks!)
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Toshiro is a strict , but fair Captain and this mostly translates well into all corners of his life. However, he holds a bit of softness for those he is closest to and can be incredibly lenient towards them, sometimes allowing them to get away with ,admittedly, more than he should. This is especially true when it comes to his significant other.
Now, don't misunderstand me. I’m not saying that he is a complete doormat, the man knows when to put his foot down, but even so he has a habit of spoiling you. This bad habit of his only becomes more apparent when you announce your pregnancy and suddenly you find there is less and less for you to do around the house. The laundry is washed, dried and folded by the time you have finished soaking in the bath. The trash has been sorted and both bags are set out for collection. Anything that has to do with using cleaning chemicals such as bleach or harsh detergents are now off limits to you. He cleans the bathroom and kitchen for you. It’s a miracle if he allows you to do the dishes after he finishes cooking dinner. Grocery shopping on the other hand can be a bit of a nightmare for you. When you are pregnant, movement can be incredibly limited and any amount of walking or standing makes your ankles swell, but he still insists that you come with him to the market each day, assisted or otherwise, so that you can get a bit of exercise and fresh air, but he makes it worth it afterwards. Sitting you down on the couch, he puts away the groceries and makes you a healthy snack, incorporating whatever you might be craving, feet propped up on his lap while he gently rubs your swollen feet and ankles. His hands are cold, like natural ice packets, his long elegant fingers digging perfectly into the joints of your foot and once he is done putting on the lotion, he slips on some therapeutic socks. (They help with circulation and swelling)  When hormones rear their ugly head, Toshiro is admittedly caught off guard. Sure, everyone had told him you might be sensitive, but this was more than just crying during a sad movie. This was an emotional vulnerability that he had never experienced before. Your body has gone through an irreversible change. Swollen and stretched, making room for the life growing inside you. And though everyone has told you what a wonderful thing it might have been, you can't help the words that might ring in your head from time to time. Ugly. Toshiro is quick to address it, showing you his love through acts of service. He has his back pressed against the headboard. Your back against his chest, blindfolded, as he uses his legs to keep your legs spread for him. He kisses your neck slowly, his breath nipping stinging your skin like a winter breeze as he whispers words of love and encouragement. His hands run themselves over your stomach, smoothing away your stress and anxieties as he climbs lower and lower. You shudder as those slender fingers meet their mark, and ,ironically, cause your body to heat under his menstruations. When all is said and done, you will be certain that you are indeed loved, no matter how your shape may change.
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miscfandomwrites · 5 months
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Please keep in mind these are reposts from my old (dead) account, Miscmarvelwritings, and thus some have my tag on the photos.
A/N: Did I slightly base this off of mine and my boyfriend’s relationship? That’s a high possibility. As far as the whole ‘housewife’ thing, it’s more so the reader wouldn’t mind just taking it easy and looking after the house while working an at home job. This is boyfriend, can confirm it’s based on us considering I had to help her write it XD
Pairing: Thor x F! Reader Smut
Warnings: Primal kink, breeding kink, basically filthy smut, language (when isn’t there), my attempt at writing smut after a couple months, reader is a sarcastic little shit, Dom / Sub dynamic, daddy kink, somno kink, Slight bit of CNC
Words: 5.6k 
Tagging: @tyler-t0t
~
“FUCK!” I snapped as the plate slipped from my fingers and fell on the ground, shattering. Just my luck, it was one of our nice ones. 
Bending down to pick up the pieces, carefully collecting them and throwing them away and grabbing the dustpan and broom, getting the rest of the shards discarded, I realized that I had accidentally nicked my hand. 
“Of course, (F/N), drop a plate and clean it up with your hands. You’re definitely not going to nick yourself.” I muttered to myself as I went to the bathroom and grabbed the medkit, carefully washing off the blood and checking to see if there were any glass shards in the cut before wrapping a bandage on it. Once that was done and I tossed the bloody tissues out, I headed back to the kitchen to finish making dinner. 
Thor had specifically asked for some sort of pasta dish when he returned from the two month mission that he was forced to go on with the team, and I definitely obliged. I had garlic bread baking in the oven as well as the pasta sauce simmering on the stove, the noodles just needed to be boiled and all I was waiting for was for him to get home so everything was fresh. 
He should be getting back anytime now… I thought to myself, before remembering I was still in my pajamas from the morning. I’d been cleaning most of the day so I headed to our bedroom and freshened up, changing into fresh clothes, a simple blue and white sundress and decided to not wear anything underneath. 
Padding back into the kitchen just in time for the door to swing open and Thor to come inside the house, a backpack on one shoulder and him holding a duffle bag in his other arm. 
We both stopped, taking a second to realize “yep, that’s my person” before he dropped his bags and ran to me, picking me up and spinning me around, holding me close to him. 
“I missed you, little mouse.” He whispered as he gently set me down, careful of the height difference. 
“I missed you too, Thor.” I whispered back as I gently held his face and kissed him. A kiss that held two months of missing the domestic bliss of living together and being in each other’s presence. 
Pulling away, resting each other's foreheads together. “Dinner is almost ready, you should go shower.” I told him, the smell of diesel and dirt clinging to him. Along with his normal scent of slight rain and more of an earthy, ground smell. 
“I don’t need a shower, I'll drop off my stuff and start a load of laundry though.” he replied, pulling away almost reluctantly as he went and grabbed his stuff and headed back to our room.
I made my way back to the kitchen, turning up the heat so the pot of water would start boiling, and adding the ricotta cheese to the sauce, along with some more seasoning. Once the water started boiling, I grabbed the fettuccine pasta and pulled out the contents of the entire box, mindful that I was living with a god, and he definitely ate like one….in more ways than that. 
I heard his footsteps before he wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his head on my shoulder, nuzzling into my neck, gently kissing it as he murmured I love you which I happily replied the same to. 
Finishing up the pasta, I went to grab it and drain it through the strainer that I’d placed in the sink, but he carefully took the pot and did it himself as I turned off the stove and oven, taking the garlic bread out and setting on top of the stove, unwrapping the tinfoil and letting it cool. 
I watched as he grabbed a tupperware and poured the noodles in it, bringing it over to me and then going to grab another for the sauce. It’s a lot easier sometimes to just serve from the tupperware when it’s freshly cooked so all we have to do is leave it out lightly covered for about an hour to let it cool before we can put it in the refrigerator. 
He poured the sauce in as I took the garlic bread off the tray and set it on the counter, taking a few pieces and putting them on the plates, him serving up my plate first than his, then grabbing them and taking them to the table. I lightly put the lids on the containers, then took the pot and the rest of the things I used to cook with in the sink and started to wash them, setting them in the dishwasher. I was almost done before a hand reached around me and turned off the faucet.
“Hey, I was almost done with those-'' I started telling Thor off, but not before he picked me up, bridal style, and took me to the dining room, plopping me on my seat. 
“You need to eat. I know you haven’t yet.” He told me, a look of slight annoyance but mostly full of care. 
“And how exactly do you know that?” 
“Because unless you’re reminded, you tend to forget to eat.” 
I gave him a look of annoyance, and all he did was give me a pointed look before I huffed, grabbing my fork and started eating.
We caught up about the last two months, him giving me the details he could of the mission while I told him about how my job was going, as well as a few new things I did around the house. 
“Autumn is approaching, I need to go out and finish harvesting the garden and make sure the hen house is kept for the winter. Also we need to cut some more firewood, as well as just the typical prep for winter.” I explained to him. It was late September, the cold was starting to kick in more as the leaves turned their fall colors. 
He hummed in response as he finished his food, then replied “Do you need to get more stuff for your canning? I believe you mentioned that a couple months ago that you need some more things for it.” 
“Yes, I also want to get a new food dehydrator, the one we have is good for fruits and vegetables, but not very good for meat. I’d like to process the venison we have and make some jerky with it.” I said as I finished the last bite of my garlic bread. 
Both sipping our preferred drinks, I leaned back in my chair, the dress riding up my thighs a bit. 
“Did you want dessert?” I asked after a bit, trying to think of what I could make quickly. 
“I do want dessert.” 
“We have ice cream, and I think there’s an instant brownie mix in the cupboard…” I told him as I got up, about to head to the kitchen until he stood up, grabbing my arm. 
He gave me a dark look, one that I’ve seen less than a dozen times, one that told me that I should probably start running. 
“Not that kind of dessert, little mouse.” He growled. I shrunk back a bit, not necessarily out of fear, however. 
“You have a two minute head start, better start running, little mouse.” I was told. He let go of my arm and I took off, running through the back door and into the woods, heart pounding as my head raced with what he’d do to me when he caught me.
Dodging trees and bushes, jumping over downed logs and small streams, I ran as fast and as far as I could. Eventually, I needed to stop. A rather large tree was ahead of me, and I took a gamble and dove behind it, back against the tree and a hand on my mouth, silencing my heavy breathing. 
Hearing nothing except for the wind and the sound of a small creek nearby, the sun setting causing the birds to all fall silent as they fell asleep, I thought I was in the clear. Peering around the corner, I saw nothing. He must’ve gone a different way. 
A small sigh of relief, I turned around only to be facing him, a small squeak coming out as he pinned me against the tree with his body, his face going to my neck as he kissed it tenderly. 
“Seems my little mouse wasn’t as clever as she should've been. You’re in for a long night, (F/N).” he growled, nipping at my neck. 
I whimpered, moving my head so he had better access and he gladly took it, wrapping an arm around me, he pulled me until I was flush against him, feeling his very obvious excitement through his jeans. He bit harder, causing me to cry out and grip him tighter. His grip was rougher, he was biting and creating marks all along my neck, to the top of my dress. 
He paused, making me look up at him, panting, trying to catch my breath. He gave a small smile, then pushed me gently against the tree, then grabbing a thigh in each hand he wrapped my legs around his waist causing me to let out a small moan as he pressed against me. 
He pulled the straps of my dress down, getting frustrated when they got caught and he ripped it a bit, a gasp leaving me as I felt the fabric rip away from me. Instantly his mouth was on mine, a hungry kiss filled with need built up over the last two months. 
Partially breaking the kiss, I pouted a bit “I liked that dress…” 
A dark chuckle, and suddenly the rest of the dress was ripped away, dropping to the forest floor. “You can buy a new one.”
He growled upon noticing I wasn’t wearing anything underneath the dress, kissing down my shoulders as he lifted me up a bit more, enough to where he could brace me against the tree with his body and leave his hands free.
“You’re such a pretty little thing, aren’t you?” He murmured, kissing on my neck, his hands traveling down my body and to my center, a breathy whimper as I felt his calloused hands travel my sides quickly turned to a needy whine as his hands hovered mere inches from where I needed them most. I could feel the heat radiating from his godly body. The hunger in his eyes staring into my soul as if he could read my every thought of how I wanted him to ruin me on the spot. 
“P-please…” A cocky smirk flashed onto his face as he gripped my thighs harder upon hearing my shaky voice. 
“Please what, Little Mouse? Gotta say it properly.”
“...wanna be touched…” I hazily replied, head foggy and all I could think about was him touching me.
“Oh you do? I don’t hear any begging Darling” He teased as his fingertips trailed the inside of my thighs, careful not to get too close to my center.
A needy whine escapes me as I subconsciously try rocking my hips. Something that didn’t pass his notice. He presses his body harder against me, the bark of the tree scratching my bare back. A light moan escapes my lips at the subtle pain.
A deep, guttural growl rumbles in his chest at my noise, his eyes growing impossibly darker. He flexes his fingers into the soft skin of my thighs as his impatience grows
I quietly sighed, leaning my head back against the tree. In a soft, almost pouty voice, “wanna be touched,..need your touch…” 
A dark chuckle sounds through the forest as he trails his fingers up my thigh and through my folds, causing me to whine and press against the tree more, not caring about anything else than him touching me. 
“So wet Little Mouse, must have missed me huh?” he teased as his fingers continually refused to enter my drenched hole, circling on my inner thighs and through my folds, avoiding both my clit and entrance.
“Mnn, mhm, missed you ‘lots..” I quietly whispered, gripping his arms tighter as he circled closer, only to whine in disappointment when he pulled away from where I needed him the most. 
“And have you been a good mouse? No touching or playing without me?” 
Whimpering, not giving him a clear answer, 
His lips grazed my neck, softly kissing it. “If you tell me the truth you won’t get into as much trouble as last time, lovely…”
“...did touch…but I wasn’t able to finish without you, Daddy…” I whined softly, one hand gripping his arm and the other going and gripping the back of his head, fingers tangling in his hair as I tried to pull him closer to my neck. 
“Hmhm, poor Little Mouse. Can’t even pleasure yourself properly… Don’t worry Baby Girl, behave and I’ll take good care of you.” A soft smile spreads across his face as one of his thumbs caresses my cheek, his eyes still holding the intent, dark look of a predator about to pounce. “Now are you going to ask nicely for what you want, or do I need to tease you a little more, hm?” 
“Please, please touch me, need your touch, please..” I finally told him, wanting his fingers in me, wanting the feel of him, the relief only he can bring.
“So pathetically needy aren’t you Little Mouse?” He groans as he allows a finger to enter me, quickly sliding another in to join the first. His pace starts slow, allowing me to adjust to him after so long, however, he quickly picks up the pace. "And so pathetically messy for me..” 
I could feel the bark lightly scratching into my skin, enough where I took notice of the feeling, and the feeling of his fingers in me, circling my entrance before they delved in again, my wetness making an audible noise as his pace picked up, my whimpers turned to whines as he studied my facial expressions as if when he was home he saw them every night. 
Two months of pent up frustration, of neediness, of not being able to get off without his touch was finally being released. My orgasm was nearing quicker than I thought it would, and feeling the stretch of a third finger caused me to cry out his title, resting my head on his shoulder. 
“You’re alright, little one, You can take it.” He murmured to me as he kissed the top of my head, carefully sliding his fingers in and out of me, stretching me in a painful but delicious way. 
With his body pinning me to the tree and using one hand to thrust his fingers into my cunt, he reached his other hand to undo the buttons of his pants, the tightness within them becoming too much for the fabric. He groaned as the tension on his bulge lessened. With his irritation temporarily eased his focus went back to thrusting his fingers deep inside me, hitting that special spot with almost every thrust.
“Please-, please, feels too good..” I whined 
“Aww, Does my Little Mouse want to cum~?” He rasped into my ear, ending his sentence with a light lick along the outside of my ear that sent shivers through my body.
“Need to, please, please Daddy…wanna cum..” My hips meeting the thrust of his fingers, my orgasm on the brink as my eyes were tightly shut and I was starting to drool a bit, panting hard as he sped up his ministrations. 
His free hand gripped my jaw as he growled “Look at me when I fuck you.”
Opening my eyes, his dark stare making me whimper and shrink back against the tree, the moonlight framing his muscular body, making me want him even more. 
Sensing how close I was based upon the fluttering of my walls he angled his hand so he could circle his thumb around my clit while he thrust his massive fingers into my core. “Who’s the one that makes you feel good, hm? Who’s the only one that can give this pretty cunt what it needs?”
“You, only you-” the rest of my sentence got cut off as he went harder, abusing that spot that made me see stars, my keening whine making him chuckle, my orgasm so, so close.
Feeling me getting closer to the edge he quickly leans in, continuing to mark up my neck. The sensation sends a tingle throughout my body, heightening my sensitivity.
“Cmon dove, I know you want to come for me..”
“Please, please, let me come. Wanna... please my god- please!~” I finally borderline yelled out, needing release so bad but wanting to be good for him. 
“Good fucking girl.” he snarled out, biting my neck as I felt the wave peak, and finally crash over me. Stars filled my vision and it felt as if every part of my body was electric, my hips rutting against his hand as I came on his fingers, tightening down and feeling my release gush out, dripping along his hand, my thighs, and even to the forest floor. 
“Gods, you’re messy little one” he chuckles out using his free hand to hold me while he brings his slick covered fingers to his lips.
 I whimper as I watch him suck my slick off his fingers. As soon as his fingers leave his mouth his lips are on mine, making me moan as I taste myself on him.
“Now, pretty girl, I’m going to fuck you so hard you’re going to scream my name into the forest, and be thankful that I haven’t decided on a punishment for you yet, Little Mouse.” he quietly murmured in my ear, the dark tone making me shiver. 
He gently places me back on solid ground so he can pull down his boxers and free his massive cock, stiff and tall, the girth and sheer size of it never fails to make me nervous. Even when I’ve been prepped to handle it, it still stretches me and borderline hurts sometimes, but oh, if it doesn’t feel good…
His groan was more of a roar as his cock sprang free. His eyes gleamed as he watched my reaction to seeing it, taking special notice to the way my tongue darted out to wet my lips. "Just going to watch Little Mouse or are you going to do something about it? You can't convince me you haven't thought of this while I was away... Two months, where I obeyed our rule..two months, I didn’t touch myself like you did, and now, you’re going to regret that.” He snarled, finally showing his annoyance at the fact I'd touched without permission.
I whimpered, shrinking back a bit, slightly fearful of what he’d do to me. 
“What do you want to do, Little one? You want to make this better?” He asked as he advanced on me, and with nowhere else to go, my back was pressed against the bark of the tree yet again. 
Barely anything more than a whimper, I told him “Wanna make you feel good..” knowing I can’t do much since he’d already made it clear that tonight would last several hours. 
He was less than a yard from me and with one word he commanded, "knees."
Not wanting to worsen my punishment, I quickly comply, ignoring the rocks and sticks poking at my legs and knees. I'm already naked, so what’s the difference between a little dirt?
"Now unless you really want me mad, I suggest putting that mouth to use Little Mouse." he places a large hand on the back of my head, making sure I can't pull away.
Taking my hands and wrapping them around his member, one hand couldn’t even wrap all the way around him, he was so big compared to me. 
Kitten licking the tip for a little bit, he eventually got frustrated enough he grabbed my hair and pulled me closer, forcing me to take his cock in my mouth, "keep teasing me like that and I'll make you regret it" he growled harshly. "Now do it right. And keep those pretty doe eyes open for me baby"
Looking up at him, I start bobbing my head up and down, taking him slowly and letting myself get used to feeling him and tasting him in my mouth. Pulling out just enough to circle the tip with my tongue, then going back down, taking a bit more of him. I can feel him in the back of my mouth, almost in my throat, and I still have another inch or so until I’m at the hilt. 
He has a musky, almost slightly earthy taste that reminds me of kissing him deeply after he’s been off world. He tugs my head farther, making me gag and my eyes water as I take him down my throat, a satisfied smirk from him and half-lidded, lust filled eyes stare down at me. 
He groans and allows his head to tilt back for a moment as the sound tears out of his throat. The sound drives me to suck harder, to increase his pleasure and drive more sounds from him.
Going deeper, wanting more of him, I grip his thighs and keep bobbing my head up and down, saliva starting to drip down my chin, the sounds of his spit-covered dick going in and out of my mouth makes me flush, knowing just how noisy it is and how thankful I am that we are in an empty forest. 
He tugs me off after he groans particularly loud. “I’m not going to waste my seed in your mouth, I want you to be filled. Cant let 2 months of it go to waste now, can we?”
He grips my hair and tugs me up, quickly picking me up. He starts running the head of his cock along my folds, teasing my entrance with the stretch to come.
I’m firmly pressed against the tree once again as he eases me down his length. Both of us moan loudly as we adjust to his cock in me
"Fuck you're tight Baby, might cum on the spot" He groans out, his hips roughly picking up a pace that has me breathless. 
He’s being rough, yet I need him more, need him rougher on me. 
“More, wan’ more…” I manage to get out, wanting to feel him pounding into me at almost a bruising pace. 
“That’s my girl..” he murmurs, snapping his hips into me, the feeling of him hitting every spot that could possibly feel good, and I feel another orgasm approaching. 
His strong arms wrap around me, hold me against him so he can thrust into me at full force. He then tilts his head to take one of my breasts in his mouth, both moaning at the sensation, my chest sensitive and slightly cold, my nipples perky in the chilly forest air. 
I feel the coil in my stomach growing, feeling him slightly pause, and move his arms downwards so he could grip my hips, massaging them causing me to relax more into his touch, the floaty, weightless feeling of my orgasm so close to me. 
"Is my baby getting close? You know you're not allowed to come without permission" he taunts, moving a hand to toy with my clit. 
Whining louder, I started to babble slightly, starting to beg. “Please, let me cum..wanna cum around you, please..”
"So desperate," he scoffs. "I almost forgot how easily you get drunk on my cock baby" he thrusts up into me hard, causing a loud cry to tear out of me. "Now be a good girl and cum for me. Cover Daddy's cock. You may just get bred too."
Letting myself go, I borderline blacked out from the pleasure, it was so intense that I could barely comprehend where I was when I gained back my eyesight again. The waves still crashing over me, not helping by Thor fucking me continuosly, I was already over sensitive, but now? I was about to faint from the feeling of him still fucking me. 
Him fucking me through my orgasm quickly brought another to the edge, I was so lost in pleasure all I could do was babble. Unable to form coherent thought I came without warning
"Fuck, you're going to squeeze me dry baby" he roared as my clenched walls threw him over the edge as well, his hot cum painting my walls, starting to drip out of me, barely taking notice and falling forward against him before everything went dark. 
A cool, soft breeze caused my hair to shift and I slowly opened my eyes, seeing white sheets and feeling the sheets against my bare body. I feel…clean, and sore. 
A strong arm is wrapped around my waist, and my back is flush against my husband, the feeling of comfort, the warmth, and everything causing me to quietly sigh and smile contently, slowly drifting off into sleep again. 
Waking up a little while later, the feeling of him tugging me into him more, a quiet whisper of “Good morning, little mouse..”
I was barely awake, enough to where I could hear him, but not enough I bothered opening my eyes. I quietly hummed, and he chuckled softly as he got up, carefully turning my body over as he kissed my collarbones, using a hand to trace the marks that littered my neck and chest. 
“So beautiful…” he murmured softly, kissing my chest and slowly moving down my stomach
I quietly whined, loving the feeling of his lips on my skin. 
"Gods I've missed you" he mutters, continuing to kiss my bare skin. He's so warm and gentle, I'm struggling to keep consciousness. "You're tired Little Mouse, go back to sleep. You know I'll take good care of you"
With that I let sleep overcome me once again, oblivious to exactly what he had meant about taking care of me.
Thor's POV:
I gently ran my hands along her skin, helping her relax and fall asleep. I kept this up for a little while after I was sure she was asleep. She can get so stressed, it's nice seeing her so calm and peaceful. Sleep adds a graceful glow to her. The past months had been hell not being able to see or feel her, and even worse since I could barely talk to her.
Even after the events in the forest last night I still hadn't had enough of her. She was so addicting, like my own personal drug. Not even the women of Asgard I'd met in my younger years could compare to the small human woman I held now. 
At the remembrance of the previous night I could feel the need growing within me, my cock twitching and growing slightly. I recall months ago she had made a comment to me. She gave me permission to use her if I ever woke up needing relief.
Keeping my eyes on her to make sure I didn't stir her, I carefully propped myself to hover over her. Slowly I trailed a finger through her folds. She was already wet. I chuckle to myself as I continue to run my finger up and down her slit, a soft moan falls from her lips but she remains asleep. I make a few more passes before easing my index into her soaked entrance. Even unconscious her walls greedily pull me in.
I start easing my finger in and out slowly, adding a second finger and after a short while a third. With every additional finger she moans and stirs, but I make sure I don't wake her. Her moans and innocent, sleeping form make my own arousal soar. My member growing more erect at the messy sounds coming from my fingers pumping her drenched hole.
My need is too great to ignore. I ease my fingers out of her, rubbing the slick that's collected on them along my shaft as I give myself a few quick strokes. With one hand  holding me up, the other grips the base of my shaft as I line myself up. I rock against her painfully slow. My massive head pushes against her small entrance, eliciting a moan from her as I stretch her.
Her cunt is so tight around my cock, I bite my lip in an attempt to quiet the roar that's tearing through my throat. Once I've finally bottomed out I pause a moment to allow us both to adjust. She fusses in her sleep, a dopey grin on her face that I know all too well is from the pleasure of being full.
I start slowly rocking into her, doing my best to keep my moans quiet. Even in her sleep she tries shifting closer to me, soft moans and whimpers occasionally leaving her parted lips. After about a minute I start getting carried away, too lost in my own pleasure. My motions get rougher and my groans get louder. 
In a groggy, confused voice I suddenly hear "H-honey? What are you-"
"Ssshhh, everything's fine Little Mouse," I interrupt, gently smoothing down her hair, "Daddy just needed a little relief is all."
She suddenly realized what was happening through the fuzziness of her sleepy brain. Moans and whimpers begin pouring from her much louder than they had in her sleep. Knowing she was awake I begin pounding into her much harder.
Reader's POV:
"O-oh god" I panted, his cock stretching me as it drove deep into my core. His breaths came out in growls that only furthered the warmth settled in my abdomen. I glance down to look at him only to be distracted by a small bulge in my lower stomach. He sees where my gaze has settled and smirks.
"What Little Mouse? I can give you an even bigger bulge. Want Daddy to fill you? Might even end up with a little one of our own…" 
A loud whimper escapes me as I nod my head, wanting nothing more than for him to fill me with all of him. 
The thought of being a mother had also been an idle thought of mine. Childbirth scared the hell out of me, but this man made it worth it. If he wanted kids, I'd gladly be the one to carry them.
"Gods I've missed using my little fucktoy" he muttered as he began rutting into me relentlessly. 
His calloused hands grip my hips hard "I'll have to look for bruises later" I think to myself
One of his hands trails down to circle my clit, a loud whine erupts from me as his finger applies steady pressure to my throbbing bud.
“Please, ‘s too much, too much, ah- Ah~” I was already so sensitive from my previous orgasms from only hours before, it felt so overwhelming that I tried to move away from his hand, it felt so good it was borderline painful. Yet he growled and gripped my hip harder, enough where I hissed in pain. 
A tinge of worry crosses his face as he slows his movements. "Do we need to stop (Y/N)?"
My eyes were closed tightly, as soon as he slowed almost to a full stop I carefully opened them, wincing at the sudden brightness. “M okay, hips are sore…so is my back” I quietly murmured to him.
He stops fully, pulling out of me as I whimper, losing the feeling of being full of him. He took his hands off my hips, carefully looking and seeing the dark purple bruises forming already from his grip. “Turn around.” he commands softly, but with a firm and steady tone. I carefully flip myself, wincing at the effort. I love him, I do, but he needs to be reminded that I’m a human and he’s a god. 
He gently runs a warm hand on my back, and I shiver at the unexpected touch. 
“Why didn’t you tell me the bark was hurting you?” He asked me quietly, stroking some lines on my back that made me wince when he touched them. Only then did I notice the fresh and old bloodstains on the bed, and since I had flipped from where I had laid….
My back was bleeding. 
"Stay put. I'll be right back" he swiftly climbed off the bed and strode to the bathroom. I hear the sound of the sink run a moment then see him return with a wash rag. He kneels on the bed beside me and carefully dabs the cloth along my wounds.
 I wince, a small pained whimper falling from my lips at the sting. Once he’s cleaned me up he disappears out of the bedroom once again. He comes back a minute later with a bag of ice wrapped in a towel, as well as some pain killers and a glass of water.
“Let's get you feeling a little better” he helps me sit up before handing me the pills and water. While I take those he applies the ice to my back. I stiffen at the sudden cold, but the relief is too nice for me to care much longer.
“Good?” he questions.
“Mm-mhm” I hum out. I lean into his chest so that my side lay against him, his arm holding the ice to my back while his other hand gently runs through my hair.
He started muttering a song I couldn’t recognize. From what I could tell it was an Asgardian lullaby. The low bass of his voice lulled me to sleep right there, in the arms of the man I love.
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robinruns · 10 months
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So far today I have charged my watch, charged and updated my headphones, updated my computer, washed a bunch of dishes, made breakfast that was like 90% veggies, drank a ton of coffee, put my fall training plans in my 2024 planner, as well as the shows I'm going to, birthdays and other stuff I already have on the books. But now that my watch and headphones are charged I unfortunately have no more excuse not to go to the gym. Also it's not below freezing anymore so I can't even use "It's cold" 😅
The rest of the day I have to get our turkey breast in the crock pot and make some stuffing and mashed potatoes for Kyle and I, I should clean up both the closet in our bedroom and our coat closet, and the bathroom needs to be cleaned. Tomorrow I plan to go into work for a little bit, but everything we're gonna be eating will be leftovers so that's cool. Also whatever I don't get to today can be done then.
Just trying to follow the momentum I have going right now.
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cryptidsurveys · 2 months
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Friday, July 26th, 2024.
Do you like coffee? I do.
Do your eyes ever twitch? Sometimes.
Do you get excited when you get something in the mail that isn’t a bill? No. Because if it's not a bill, then it's probably paperwork of some sort and I hate paperwork.
What was the last thing you wrote by hand? I signed out after volunteering earlier.
Why did you last feel exhausted? I currently feel somewhat emotionally/socially exhausted. Sometimes things just get to me. It's been a day like any other - nothing all that different or out of the ordinary has happened - but it's like my defenses/reserves just aren't functioning the way they usually do. It's exhausting to try so hard, to continue putting myself out there, but to still feel like a permanent outcast.
Have you ever used emotional blackmail to get your own way? I'm not sure what you mean by emotional blackmail, but have I ever been emotionally manipulative? Sure.
Has anybody ever used emotional blackmail on you? I guess.
Assuming you have any, is your hair soft today? Not really. My hair always feels so dry.
Who did you last worry about and why? I'm not sure who that would have been.
When are you next at work? I'm just going to answer work-related questions with my volunteer stuff from now on. I'll be there again on Sunday, probably for a full day.
Do you enjoy your work? Yeah. I get to spend my day around a ton of cats, and the actual "work" aspect is relatively easy and straightforward. I'll give a basic rundown.
Depending on the day, I'll get there sometime between 7-8am.
Start laundry; fold and put away any clean stuff.
If Alex or Diane is there, then I'll go back to cattery around 7:30 and start getting things set up - line up carriers to put the cats in while we clean the colonies + get the dish/scoop/rag/mop bins ready if someone else hasn't already done that.
Clean colonies and kennels from around 8-10:30 (sometimes it takes a bit longer; sometimes it goes by quite quickly). We wipe everything down, refill food and water, scoop litter, change bedding if needed, and sweep and mop colonies.
I don't do all of the following tasks - it's kind of divided up between whoever is there - but then we wash dishes and scoops, sweep and mop the main room, clean out and put away carriers, take out the trash, and straighten things up.
Then we chill out for a bit and play with the kitties. Go to lunch sometime around 11-12pm.
Come back, continue to chill; help direct other volunteers or anyone looking to adopt.
I think around 2pm is the afternoon feed, so we'll feed the cats, let them eat, pick up and wash dishes. They let me feed yesterday, so that was cool. :')
3pm, second litter scoop + clean scoops afterward.
Shortly before 4pm, go get Smeagle from the office and put him back in his cattery kennel.
4pm, go around the whole shelter and empty and replace trash bags, then take trash out to the big dumpster.
Around 4:30-5pm, see if the dog side needs any help with things; so maybe do dishes, fill water bowls, mop and dry kennels, pick up stuff from the yards, take stuff to the back to spray it down, etc.
Annnd get out whenever all that's finished and final checks are done. Sometimes it's close to 6pm, but yesterday we managed to get out of there at 5:15.
Are you currently looking for a new place to live? No.
When was the last time you ate/drank something gross just to be polite? I'm not sure. I don't tend to put myself in that sort of situation.
Can you see any toys from where you’re sat? Do stuffed animals count? I can see a couple of those.
Last time you heard a growl, who or what did it come from? Probably a cat at the shelter.
Does it bother you when you forget something that you should know? Yeah. Or whenever I forget to do or mess up something simple.
What was the last thing you put off doing? Cleaning the bathroom. I'll do that when I'm finished here, though.
When did you last make up a baby’s bottle? I've never done that before.
What was the last thing you cooked? I haven't done any real cooking in quite some time. Most I'll do is heat stuff up on the stove/in the oven or put something in the microwave.
Do you eat your dinner at a dining table, coffee table or just off your lap? I usually eat in my room, at my computer desk. Sometimes I'll eat at the kitchen table and chat with my dad, though. Especially after full days at the shelter because it's pretty much like - get home, shower, eat, get ready to go to bed.
When did you last see the sea? Not since I was a teen.
Which would you prefer as a view; mountains or the sea? Mountains.
Do you have a mouse for your laptop? (Assuming you have a laptop) I don't have a laptop.
Do you apologise a lot? Not excessively…? I mostly just use it as a variation of "excuse me" if I accidentally get in someone's way or whatever.
Do you have any framed black & white photos in your home? Who are they of? No.
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thejennhall · 1 year
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The Art of Homemaking
The simple art of homemaking means turning your house into a home. A calming, clean, safe place for yourself, your family, and guests. You want people including guests to feel welcome in your home. It doesn't need to look like a museum or something. A simple, cozy, warm, and welcoming home is fairly easy to accomplish. I have been a Homemaker for 27 years. I absolutely love creating a peaceful and beautiful home for my family. It takes a special person to take on the role of Homemaker. You have to be creative first of all. You will be in charge of deciding how to decorate your home with what you have on hand and how to use those items to create a beautiful, peaceful, cozy home. You will also need to be extremely organized. Without organization you will become overwhelmed very quickly. I will cover a Homemaking schedule in another blog post that will help you organize your time.
Taking care of Family
Taking care of your family should always be the first priority. For my husband, I always have a special room ( study) set up for him to relax and enjoy. I believe each spouse should have a place of their own to relax, read, etc. Children need to have fun and be children without all the nonsense that goes on in the world. They also need discipline and boundaries. It's our responsibility to raise respectful children, not the schools, churches, camps, etc. Homeschooling is a great way to know what your kids are being exposed to on a daily basis. I homeschooled our daughter and loved every minute of it. Our daughter was extremely creative when she was young and loved writing and art. Homeschooling allowed us the freedom to really encourage her creativity and watch it blossom and grow. After graduating High School at 15 she went to work as an entertainment writer and Junior Editor at a major entertainment company.
A good rule to follow in the family category is this: Spouse first ( they will still be with you once the kids are grown and on their own), then children. If you're a religious person the order will be God, Spouse, Children.
Clean Daily
Contrary to popular belief cleaning doesn't have to take all day. Clean as you go through the day. Always put stuff back where it belongs when you finish using it. Wash, dry, and put away dishes as you use them. Wipe down kitchen counters and table several times a day. Clean the bathroom every morning.
Cooking
I am the first one to admit that when I got married I had very little knowledge when it came to cooking. I was a big believer in takeout when I was single. My husband taught me how to cook some things but I mostly learned by visiting people and watching how they cooked and prepared weekly menus and grocery lists based on those menus to save money. Over the years I have learned how to prepare meals for very little money and I still have easy dinner ideas I fall back on when I have had a busy day.
Create Inviting Atmosphere
This is probably my favorite part. Throwing quilts over the furniture to wrap up in is a great way to add a cozy feel. I love that warm, cozy feeling I get from having a beautiful quilt to throw over my lap. Scented candles and incense sticks is another way to make a home smell great and add a level of comfort to your home. I also use relaxation music to achieve this effect. When it comes to music you want to be sure it's playing softly in the background. Loud enough to hear but not so loud that people have to yell to hear each other talk.
Entertaining
Most of us don't host fancy dinners but a good rule of thumb is to be prepared when guests stop by unannounced. Always welcome them into your home with a smile. I always have plenty of coffee, sweet tea, and a variety of hot tea on hand for occasions such as this. I also have a couple of no-bake cheesecake mixes on hand. It's simple to whip up a cheesecake to go with coffee and tea.
Hospitality
A good Homemaker always shows grace and hospitality to everyone. It's easy to show hospitality to people you know but you can also reach out to people in your community. A young married couple that may need help, parents that could use a small break from the kids so they can have a date night. Neighbors that need groceries picked up from the store due to age or health problems. Look for ways to help those in need through your church, neighborhood, etc. Hospitality goes hand in hand with Homemaking. Writing letters, sending birthday cards, Christmas cards, even Thank You notes via snail mail is a wonderful way to show hospitality and let people know that you are thinking of them.
Enjoy the article? Consider buying me a coffee 💖
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regular-lord-reckoner · 5 months
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it is spring time and appropriately, i have been a very busy bee !!
i'm on much needed pto and it is wonderful. i somehow managed to get completely caught up on all my work before i left so i'm not stressed about when i go back next week
i've mostly been sleeping a lot which i desperately needed and i've been doing a lot of things i've meant to for a while now
namely scheduling doctors appointments and updating my insurance everywhere i need to and that sort of shit, plus some legal stuff my mom and i are doing for some of my dad's stuff.
since monday i also started finally working on my closet again. i had to stop last time and toss everything back in there because...yeah, but now that i can spread some things out again i've made a lot of progress so far
every day i go in with the goal of getting out at least one bag of stuff to throw away and i've also moved out a bunch of clothes i'll need to sort through and a few other things i might be able to give away
feel like i can actually breathe in there again so that's nice. needed that. i'll probably work on it some more over the next two days and then take a break but it should be a lot easier now that i've really gotten the ball rolling to finish it up and fingers fucking crossed this time it'll be all done by the fall where it can just be my nice closet again and i can actually find things !!
i also finally went to get my oil changed today and fortunately there were no other problems so that went smoothly !! i got it washed, too (not that it matters now because it's pouring rain outside now lol) and i stopped to get my mom a birthday card and a gift bag for her present since her birthday is on monday !!
other than all of that i'm just trying to take it easy and unwind. trying to still rest a lot and not push myself too hard or do anything i don't feel up to.
for the past, mmm, i dunno, while i've just been full of piss and vinegar if that wasn't evident so i've tried to just be real quiet and keep to myself until i can feel less overwhelmed.
i'm still in that time out corner for now but i'm starting to feel a lot better so that's something! i've been doing a lot of cleaning lately as well (i did my bathroom on monday and will be doing laundry all throughout the week as week as well as the usual dishes and garbage duty) so that usually helps me feel a bit better.
it's also very cathartic just...throwing a bunch of shit away !! and having more space !! yay !!
oh, i also finally had therapy again after like...a month and i'm not sure yet what my new insurance situation will look like, but i think we're all happy to be done with my old insurance (she was telling me about something weird they did that i just...cannot fathom (something about mailing her a paper credit card that no one would accept ?? idk), but oh well, good riddance !!) and i'm slowly but surely working on paying her back !!
lastly, i tried a new coffee place today because i'm still trying to figure out which local coffee spot will be my new favorite now that i no longer haunt starbucks or dunkin and i went to this new one today and i....i definitely ordered a chai...a 32 oz one at that because why not, i love chai.... whatever they gave me definitely was not chai.
i'm not sure what it is exactly, but it's definitely got coffee in it and i thought at first maybe it was a dirty chai but no. and it's no big deal, i took it and just drove on but what's baffling to me is i was the only customer at that time.
nobody in front of me, no one behind me and maybe they were doing a mobile order or something but i had to sit there for a few minutes while they made it and it was...not at all what i was expecting, but also not bad !! haven't had an iced coffee in a minute so i'll take it !! (they also put a little chocolate covered espresso bean on the top which was very good)
anyway, i thought that was kinda funny. i've also finished all my chores and errands for the day now so i might take a nap or i might read or who knows what i might do, i actually have time to myself !!!!
just wanted to give a little update since for once it isn't me just bitchin' about things XD
hope if you're reading this that you're doing well and i'll be back to being a human (or as close to it as i get) ....sometime !! <3
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twistsandtwizzles · 1 year
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Stars on Mars: Episode 2
Well, friends. Since Adam was found too hot to be voted off of “Mars” last week, we find ourselves back here for episode two of Stars on Mars. I wish I could tell you that it has gotten less dumb, but I am not here to lie to you.
We open with another Shatner intro, breaking down the concept for us: twelve celebrities, twenty-four days, on a mission to find out if they can “survive on Mars.” Unfortunately for Ariel, this intro includes her calling Lance Armstrong “a real astronaut” and this poor woman is going to be saddled with that for the rest of this show’s run, I’m afraid. Shatner also doubles down on his “Starssssss on Marssssss” line delivery, which I respect.
It’s morning in the hab on “Sol Day 3” and BOY did this show’s production team really love the movie The Martian. Our celebrities begin waking up and wandering around the hab. Schwartz and Adam are in the kitchen, Schwartz apparently washing dishes while Adam pokes around for some food. “Hopefully it’s a nice calm day today, with no emergencies,” Schwartz says, which is an incredibly naive thing for a guy who makes his living on reality tv to say.
“I would BEG for that to happen,” Adam replies, the huge grin on his face demonstrating that he knows there is not a chance that they will have a nice, calm day on this reality show about celebrities pretending to live on Mars. “But we’re going to do something today though, for sure.”
Schwartz VOs that everyone is tired from their satellite repair mission the day before. The Hab AI lets the crew know that they need to keep the hab clean and reminds them again that rations are limited.
Ronda is in the bio-dome tending to the plants and “making a compost.” It appears that they have a pretty robust supply of carrots and a bunch of other greens. Richard wanders in to give her a hand, explaining in a talking head that he is nervous about the food situation, but that also it’s pretty cool that they are growing stuff, adding that “I’ve never done that in my life.”
Adam and Ronda are working out when Marshawn wanders out of his special Base Commander suite, wearing a fluffy white robe and brushing his teeth. Schwartz tells that camera that being Base Commander is a “status symbol”: “It’s like having a Rolls-Royce on Mars. It’s cool.” Lance takes this moment to use Marshawn’s private bathroom, which last week Marshawn explicitly told him not to do. He thinks this is hilarious; Marshawn is less amused.
The group is starting to jockey for position for who is going to be the next Base Commander, since Marshawn’s 48 hours are up. Ronda is interested - she says she always wanted to be an astronaut. Schwartz, on the other hand, says there is no chance he will ever be Base Commander and that he likes doing grunt work and not being in charge. He adds in a talking head that he may be “too passive.” 
Lady AI Voice instructs the crew to pick a new base commander, and as they all gather around the monitor to listen to their instructions Porsha throws her arm around Adam, which is cute. Marshawn says that he will wrestle someone for the position. Most of the cast looks flummoxed, but Ronda Rousey is like, you want to do what? And promptly pins him to the ground. Because she’s Ronda Fucking Rousey.
However, the cast agrees that the actual best way to choose the next Base Commander is to vote. Tinashe throws her hat in the ring. Marshawn says he wants to stay Base Commander and Ariel immediately tells him that he is not going to be Base Commander a second time.
Meanwhile Tallulah (whose chyron this week says she is an “entrepreneur”) is suggesting to Adam and Schwartz that SHE should be Base Commander - a promotion after she was a successful Mission Specialist last week. They are buying what she’s selling - and so is Ronda, who says that Tallulah was great on the coms during the mission: “I heard every word of her encouraging haikus.” Ronda then follows up her supportive words by saying that she’s worried that Tallulah might wander off after a butterfly if she’s out in the field. 
Porsha has the role of talking-head-explaining-reality-tv-basics this week, and she tells us that in this game you have to build social bonds, but at the same time you are all competing against each other. 
Tallulah wins the vote and Tinashe doesn’t seem thrilled. Tallulah says, “I don’t know what prepared me for this, but I’ve waited my whole life to show up for it” which is sweet but also girl it’s a reality show where you are pretending to be an astronaut and so I hope there are other things you are also waiting for. She adds that she’s holding them all in her “heart chakra.”
Adam’s take: “Tallulah is somebody so authentically themselves, and so unapologetically quirky and lovely . . . yeah, this could go horribly wrong.” Cut to commercial.
(Oh, Tallulah also says she’s not going to move into the Base Commander Suite which of course THRILLS Marshawn.) 
Natasha is in the kitchen “getting to know her fellow teammates” which in this case means Schwartz. She tells him she’s never seen Vanderpump but her friend watches every episode. This leads Schwartz to explain Scandoval to the people in America who have somehow managed to avoid coverage of it over the last three months and if this is you, please teach me your ways. I’ve seen five minutes of the show in my life and can still tell you about Ariana and Raquel and that apparently Tom Sandoval has ruined white nail polish for us all.
Also Schwartz says he is recently divorced, and Natasha says, “yeah the pandemic was kind of rough,” to which Schwartz strangely muses, “It was good for our marriage I think.” And Natasha, confused as the rest of us, says, “Why, it ended in divorce.” And I laughed.
Tallulah assigns base duties - notably sending Schwartz and Ariel outside to squeegee the solar panels and assigning Porsha and Lance to conduct health and wellness checks. These health checks appear to include blood pressure, heart rate, temperature, and a “wellness” survey.
During Adam’s wellness check, Lance asks him how he’d rate his happiness on a scale of one to ten. Adam replies, “Ten. I’ve never been happier.” Natasha immediately calls him out: “You’ve never been happier? That’s so good to know" and they both laugh because clearly this not the happiest any of them have ever been. Porsha tells Adam that his temperature is . . . good. I am not convinced she knows how to use a thermometer.
Schwartz and Ariel clean the solar panels and complain about doing physical labor; they decide to dump the excess water because “I guess we don’t need it.” This, my friends, is what we call “foreshadowing.” They plod back to the hab as Schwartz talks about how desperately he wants a shower.
Then, a cut to the command room where the screen lights up with a warning: Water Pressure Critical. Then a cut to a water tank outside, which explodes. Then a second tank explodes. Then a third. 
Inside, the crew discovers they have no running water. You know what that means: an emergency dispatch from Shatner. He explains that there is no water! (Duh.) But guess what: there is a bunch of FROZEN WATER UNDER THE SURFACE OF MARS. Amazing that they know that and also exactly where it is! Important Shatner note: if the mission fails, the Base Commander will be up for extraction, but the Mission Commander is going to be safe from extraction success or failure.
Oh my god this episode isn’t even half over why am I explaining all this in so much detail! Jesus. Okay, blah blah blah they have to send the crew out to get the water. Natasha volunteers to be Mission Specialist, primarily because she doesn’t want to go out to Mars and also because as she tells the rest of the group, that she’ll be able to translate Tallulah’s “woo-woo” instructions as needed.
So everyone except for Tallulah and Natasha dons their spacesuits and head out to the surface. The mission is going to involve rappelling down a cliff and then using a tarp to direct the water to a hose that will bring the water back up top. They have thirty minutes to fill four barrels with water.
Tallulah and Natasha have assigned Adam and Ariel to stay at the surface and fill the barrels. Immediately Marshawn says that he doesn’t want rappel down because he does not want to go into a cave “where I don’t know if there are snakes or spiders.” Tallulah sighs and switches Marshawn with Adam.
Porsha rappels first, confronting her fear of heights with encouragement from Richard, Adam, and Lance. Adam goes next, saying he looks “like a gay Buzz Lightyear.” Everyone makes it down and it’s only Schwartz left when Ariel suddenly decides SHE wants to go down into the cave, not stay up top. This causes a crisis in mission command, and Schwartz volunteers to stay because Ariel is clearly “experiencing a little FOMO.” Tallulah sighs and says fine, Ariel can go down, despite that fact that the mission guidelines say that physical strength is needed in the cave and they’ve already lost Marshawn. It is clear that literally everyone except for Ariel thinks this is a bad idea.
Okay. So it takes a bit of time for this crew to figure out how the tarp works, to Lance’s annoyance and look Lance is clearly an asshole but I would be annoyed here too. But they figure it out and start filling the barrels. Everything is going smoothly and Schwartz reports that they have three and a half barrels full and there are still six minutes left. Everyone celebrates! 
Then the hose falls apart, and Ariel can’t hook it back in because it’s too heavy for her. Adam rushes over to help. We cut to a talking head where Ariel says that “maybe” if she “knew how physical” the task was going to be, she would have stayed up top. And . . . girl. 
The pipe gets fixed and the team loses maybe a minute of time. And up top, Schwartz has bad news: actually, when he said they had three and half barrels filled before? He “misspoke.” There were only two and half barrels done.
Natasha and Tallulah are in disbelief. “You said we had three and a half.”
“I misspoke,” Schwartz says again. There are two minutes left.
They keep trying but obviously there is no way they are going to fill another bucket and a half in this amount of time. The mission fails.
Tallulah is directed to go up to the airlock and join the rest of the crew up for elimination. Natasha is left alone in the hab to start selecting people to stay. She chooses Ariel as mission critical first which would not be MY choice seeing as her insistence on switching jobs is the reason Schwartz was up top to begin with, but, whatever.
Anyway, this episode’s bottom three: Schwartz, Tallulah, and Marshawn. The group decides that Marshawn should stick around given that his strength will probably be useful on Mars, and also, he’s not the one who miscounted barrels. 
To me, this choice between Tallulah and Schwartz is clear: it is not hard to count to four even for a man who stars on Vanderpump Rules, and Schwartz should be out of here. Tinashe agrees with me. However, the rest of the crew thinks that Tallulah should have been more forceful as commander and not let people switch jobs willy-nilly. So they say goodbye to Tallulah.
Tallulah says that on Mars she found “joy and deep connections with people" and that she is very proud of herself.
This is a bad elimination!!! Why do I care?? This show is so dumb.
Next week: fire in the biolab! A robot dog! And Marshawn refusing to give up the base commander suite.
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