#I seriously need to put my ideas into works
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cowboylikefaith · 2 days ago
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with great power...
art donaldson spiderman! au x reader
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summary: stanford has a masked superhero on the loose, and you're trying to crack down on his identity. little do you know, it's your boyfriend art.
warnings: cursing, injuries, reader highkey gets mugged, art is being mysterious af, reader is incredibly oblivious, sappy at the end sorry, not proofread
author's note: HI so this is actually my first time writing a fic ever... but this au idea has been absolutely rotting in my brain for the past week or so and i need to get it out. enjoy!!!!!!
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"dude!" you say barging into art's dorm (not realizing that your poor boyfriend was in the middle of a nap) "look at the topic the newspaper just assigned me. some shithead on campus is doing parkour in a scuba suit, people are calling him 'spiderman'."
art is pulled out of his trance-like state when he hears the name fall out of your mouth. you feel bad after realizing you woke him up, seeing him wipe his tired eyes with a pout on his lips. "hey pretty" he says with a lopsided smirk on his face "what were you talking about? some spider-idiot?" you hop into bed next to him "yeah it's nothing...sorry for waking you up, just go back to bed, 'kay?"
you don't know what's been up with art recently. he rarely returns your calls, he's always tired, and when he's awake, he's either in a rush or incredibly sluggish. you asked patrick about it and he said that the beginning of a new tennis season is wearing both of them down. seems reasonable, right?
now, it's been a few weeks since you were assigned this story, and jess (your senior editor) wants you to photograph and interview this spiderman guy, because apparently he's some kind of campus superhero (returning stolen laptops, helping drunk sorority girls avoid getting hit by cars, the usual) however you have no leads so far.
until one day, tashi tells you a story about how he saved a freshman from the tennis team from being hazed, and you decide to ask your boyfriend about it.
"you don't know anything about a kid named steven mcdonald, do you?" you ask art as you settle down to watch some gossip girl.
"that freshman who survived a hazing incident? yeah, i know of him" he replies as he pulls you into his arms and kisses your forehead.
you pull away with furrowed eyebrows "well did he...say...anything about that night?"
"uh no. no, not really" he says (a little distantly) "anyway! i seriously don't understand why serena loves dan so much, nate is obviously the better choice for her."
you roll your eyes sarcastically "wow donaldson...really smooth transition! way to change the subject there honey."
"i'm sorry.." he replies as he plays with your hair "it's just that...i don't want you getting mixed up in that kind of stuff. if you got hurt.." he sighs "i don't know what i'd do with myself"
and so you promise art that you'll stop working on the article...until jess says she'll kick you out of the stanford star if you do.
one night, as you're walking back to your dorm after dinner with tashi and patrick (third wheel much?), a man in a black ski mask suddenly approaches you and orders you to put your hands up.
"give me your fucking heels lady...and your purse!" he demands.
"oh god no" you shut your eyes and groan "please sir, these are really expensive and- and these are manolo blahniks!! my mom bought-"
before you can finish your rambling, you can hear a thud, and when open your eyes, you can see that he's been wrapped up in some web-like substance.
"don't worry, he's not dead" a figure says as he walks out from behind the criminal. you feel like you know him, you can't even see his face but something about him is just so familiar, and you can't put your finger on it. until..
oh my god
"oh my god! you're spiderman! thank you so much, seriously. that guy could've killed me" you say excitedly, forgetting about your past opinions about him.
art- i mean spiderman, chuckles and says that it's no problem, and asks if he could take you back to your dorm.
"yeah! i would love that, thank you." you reply "actually, could i take your photo? i'm doing an article about you for the stanford star." oh and art eats it UP. he's doing stupid poses and acting silly and goofy (just to hear you laugh of course).
you get back to your dorm safely, and spiderart bids you farewell. just before he leaps out your window, he pulls a red stanford cap (one that you've never noticed, and one that looks suspiciously like art's) out of his pocket.
"hey, maybe i'll see you around" he says as he puts the cap on...backwards. something that only art would do. lucky enough for him, you're too tired to notice.
"...and those are the differences between meiosis and mitosis." you're trying to study for another biology exam when all of a sudden you hear a tapping noise on your window.
at first you think it's a bird, or some frat boy trying to piss you off by throwing empty beer cans at your window, but the tapping turns into banging and you start to hear sounds of pain through the glass.
you run to the window and see a boy in a familiar red and blue suit sitting on the windowsill. this time with a huge gash in his side.
"spiderman? oh my god, get inside, what happened?" you ask while scrambling for a first aid kit. art falls onto your bed, unknowingly bleeding all over your new floral sheets. he groans and holds his side, mumbling something about...well god knows what.
art protests as you try to patch up the very open wound by his waist. "you're just like my boyfriend art," you say with a grin "he gets all fucked up during his tennis matches and doesn't let me help him out." you can hear him through the mask but you can't tell if it's a laugh or a whimper.
"jesus- how long is this going to take? i have an econ final to study for" he says with a wince. "not very long if you sit still, spiderboy" you retort "why don't you take off your mask? you must be dying with that thing on."
you feel his face, and it feels...familiar. you slowly take off the mask, and reveal art's lips, sculpted nose, blue and brown eyes, and tousled blonde hair.
suddenly you realize. you realize the reasons for the missed calls, hurried kisses, and rain-checked dates. all this time you've been thinking that it was tennis kicking his ass, when really art was kicking other people's.
"hi honey" art mumbles, same lopsided, boyish smile that you fell in love with gracing his face "i'm sorry. i should have told you." before you can say anything, he kisses you and sneaks his hands to the small of your back. you can feel him smiling into the kiss as he pulls you into his lap.
"i missed you" you say, pulling away with a pout. you card your hands through his blonde curls. "i know, i know, i'm sorry pretty girl, it's just that...i don't want you to worry about me." art replies, pushing your hair away from your face.
you flick his forehead. "you dumbass. of course i'm going to worry about you, whether you like it or not...because i like you. a lot. no matter what kind of freaky superpowers you have." art lets out a weak chuckle, then he kisses you like a man stuck in the desert for 40 days. you can feel him drawing small circles along your hips and caressing your thumb.
you pull away one last time. "now tell me spiderboy...how did you go from tennis team captain to stanford superhero?"
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flwrkid14 · 2 days ago
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Hi! Can we get some more Jason Todd: Dad Mode Activated? đŸ„ș👉👈 maybe about how Jason helps Tim with his crushes or maybe like how to cope with some mental health struggles/ Tim comparing how different Jason lectures him to Bruce’s lectures?
Hi!! Thank you so much for the ask! <3 These are such great concepts, and I’d have so much fun exploring them! While I’m not sure I’ll make a full post for this, I’d love to share my thoughts on how these ideas could play out!
For Jason helping Tim with crushes, I feel like he’d totally be that dad—the one who embarrasses you in front of your crush on purpose. Tim, of course, doesn’t tell Jason about his crushes for this exact reason, but Jason is way too observant not to figure it out anyway. Imagine them out together (because Jason has once again dragged Tim away from his work to make him take a break), and Jason spots Tim’s current crush walking down the street. He’d nudge Tim with that smug, teasing grin of his, going, “Timmy! Look, Timbo! It’s Bernard! Isn’t he a good friend of yours? What’s he doing out here? Let’s go say hi!” And then, before Tim can protest, Jason’s already dragging him over, while Tim is blushing furiously and muttering curses under his breath. Jason’s embarrassing as hell, but... it’s also endearing. And for Tim, who didn’t grow up with that kind of playful, teasing love, it felt oddly nice... even if his dad was now enthusiastically talking about his cuddling habits when sleeping (screw him for being touch starved) to a very confused Bernard.
As for coping with mental health, Jason would be such a huge advocate. Realizing that Tim is his kid now—and that he’s essentially a dad—would really push Jason to work on his own mental health. He’d know he can’t preach good habits to Tim if he’s not setting a good example himself (because independent Tim Drake—who grew up without much supervision—definitely needs someone to lead by example. He needs proof that taking advice from someone else is worth it, especially when his own methods have always worked just fine for him).
So Jason starts his own mental health journey, taking active steps to improve himself, and Tim notices. And it hits him hard, because none of his parental figures before—Bruce or Jack—ever did that. They never cared about their own well-being for his sake, to be better parents to him. Seeing Jason make that effort makes Tim feel so incredibly loved and valued.
Jason wouldn’t just lecture Tim or bark orders at him; he’d actively help him build better habits. He’d set up mandatory family dinners once a week to encourage better eating patterns and help Tim develop routines that supported a healthier sleep schedule, tailored to his needs, once they realized the standard eight hours a night just wasn’t realistic for him.
It’s these little changes that make Tim realize just how different Jason is from Bruce.
Jason doesn’t demand things from Tim that he doesn’t practice himself. He wouldn’t tell Tim to stop working late if he wasn’t also putting his own work aside and calling it a night. If he’s telling Tim to eat better, he’s leading by example—packing ready-to-go meals for both of them when there’s no time to cook. Jason shows Tim why these changes are worth it, through actions and positive outcomes.
Bruce, on the other hand, never did that. Whatever Bruce told Tim to do was just an expectation. He’d demand Tim do better or lecture him without ever showing how or why it mattered. If Bruce criticized Tim’s performance in the field but was himself guilty of being distracted—like running off mid-patrol for a rendezvous with catwoman—Tim just nodded along and tuned him out. Bruce’s hypocrisy made it impossible for Tim to take him seriously.
But Jason? Jason shows Tim why he should listen, fixing his own behavior and performance first before ever asking the same of Tim. And that difference speaks volumes. For Tim, who’s used to parental figures endless demands with no understanding behind them, Jason’s approach feels like a breath of fresh air—and the kind of support he never knew he needed.
hopefully that lived up to your expectations! <3
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ang3lc · 7 hours ago
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hello đŸ«¶đŸ» I love your fics!! I have an idea, there's this prank on tiktok, where you put more on your partner's plate and very little food on your plate (even though there is more in the kitchen, you tell them that's all that was left). It would be nice to read his reaction to this prank. Thank you!
everytime i think of domestic!john i think of joe graves and then my legs start shaking 😕
cw: none
john settles into his chair, his usual end-of-day silence filling the room as you place his plate in front of him. it’s piled high—more food than he could possibly finish—and for a second, he just stares at it.
you set your own plate down next, and his eyes flick to it immediately. barely anything, just a few bites arranged neatly on the plate.
he doesn’t say anything at first, just picks up his fork and glances between the plates. then he exhales, low and sharp. "what’s this?"
"dinner," you say, as casually as you can, taking a tiny bite.
he gestures with his fork to both of your plates. "this is all there is?"
"yep," you say, nodding.
he doesn’t look convinced, his eyes narrowing slightly. "and you thought i needed enough to feed me and my men twice over, while you’ve got
 that?"
you shrug, avoiding his gaze. "you’ve been working all day. figured you could use the extra."
he sets the fork down and leans back, arms crossing over his chest. "right." there’s a long pause as he watches you, his expression unreadable, and you have to fight to keep a straight face.
then he sighs, getting to his feet without a word.
"where are you going?" you ask, trying to sound surprised.
"kitchen."
"john, seriously, that’s all there is."
he doesn’t even look back. "mm-hm."
you sit there, biting the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing, as you hear him open the fridge. a beat passes before his voice cuts through the quiet.
"so this is all there is, yeah?"
when he comes back, holding the container of food you tried to hide, he sets it down on the table without a word, his expression flat.
you can’t hold back your laughter anymore, and he just shakes his head, sitting back down.
"you’re an idiot," he says, but there’s the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he pushes some of the food from his plate onto yours. "eat."
"you’re lucky you’re cute," he mutters when you beam at him, then sitting back down. but there’s a softness in his voice, and that little smile tugging at his lips gives him away.
mlist
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justalittleweird · 1 day ago
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Just some shit that gets me... I know it's long... some of my fav quotes... there's so many
"You hurt my brother, I'll kill you, I swear. I will kill you all." -1x15
"You said you're a big brother. You'd take care of your little brother? You'd do anything for him?" "Yeah, I would." -1x18
"That's my boy." -1x11&1x21
"I'm gonna say this one time you make a move on him, you'll be dead before you hit the ground, you understand me?" - 2x09
"Come here. Let me look at you... Hey, look at me, it's not even that bad. All right?... I'm gonna take care of you. I got you. That's my job, right?... Oh god..." -2.21
"I always tried to protect you... keep you safe." -2x22
"Don't get mad at me, don't you do that. I had to. I had to look out for you. That's my job." "You save my life over and over. I mean, you sacrifice everything for me, don't you think I'd do the same for you? You're my big brother. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you." - 2x22
"'Cause I know you... 'cause I've been following you around my entire life. I've been looking up to you since I was 4, Dean. Studying you, trying to be just like my big brother. So yeah, I know you. Better than anyone else in the entire world... I wish you'd drop the show and be my brother again... just cause." -3x07
"Sammy, all I'm saying is that you're my weak spot. You are. And I'm yours." "You don't mean that. We're-We're family." -3x16
"Got your lunch? Books? Butterfly Knife?.. you okay?" -4x13
"You poisoned him." "No, I gave him what he needed, and it wasn't some bitch in a g-string. It was you." -4x14
"I'm sorry." -4x22
"I don't think we can ever be what we were. You know? I just don't think I can trust you." -5x01
"Because whatever we have between us. Love. Family. Whatever it is, they are always going to use it against us. And you know that." -5x03
"I just know we're all we've got. More than that. We keep each other human." "Thank you, really... I won't let you down." -5x03
"In between jobs, Sam and Dean would sometimes get a day – sometimes a week, if they were lucky... Sam used to insist on honest work, but now he hustles pool, like his brother. They could go anywhere and do anything... when it was clear, they'd park her in the middle of nowhere, sit on the hood, and watch the stars for hours without saying a word. It never occurred to them that...maybe they never really had a roof and four walls
but they were never, in fact, homeless." -5x22
"Sam, it's okay. I'm here... I'm not gonna leave you. I'm not gonna leave you." "It's okay, Dean. It's gonna be okay. I've got him." -5x22
"Look at me. Come on. You don’t know what’s real?... Let me see your hand... This is real...I was with you when you cut it, I sewed it up. Hey, I am your flesh-and-blood brother, okay? I’m the only one who can legitimately kick your ass in real-time. You got away. We got you out, Sammy... Believe me, okay? You gotta believe me. You gotta make it stone number one and build on it." -7.02
"You can barely do it with me. I mean, you think I screw up everything I try. You think I need a chaperone, remember?"
"Come on, man. That's not what I meant."
"No, it's exactly what you meant. You want to know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was? It was how many times I let you down. I can't do that again. What happens when you've decided I can't be trusted again?...who are you gonna turn to next time instead of me? Another angel? Another vampire? Do you have any idea what it feels like to watch your brother just.."
"Hold on, hold on! You seriously think that? Because none of it -- none of it -- is true. Listen, man, I know we've had our disagreements, okay? Hell, I know I've said some junk that set you back on your heels. But, Sammy
come on. I killed Benny to save you. I'm willing to let this bastard and all the sons of bitches that killed mom walk because of you. Don't you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you! It has never been like that, ever! I need you to see that. I'm begging you." -8x23
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jadasmp4 · 2 days ago
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★ PAIRING: ARTIST!MADISON X FEM!READER
★ warnings: use of y/n, suggestive content ★ a/n: shit writing but im bored so like why not ★ SYNOPSIS: Madison gets the idea to tattoo reader while they're hanging out.
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The rough scratch of a pen against paper filled my ears as I laid on one side of my bed with my eyes closed. Near the edge of the bed was Madison, sketching whatever her mind could think of on a random piece of mail that was thrown onto the table, either earlier today or maybe a month ago. Who knows how long ago? Its anybody's guess. We’ve been laying around in my room for like, 2 days. Doing whatever really. Watching rick and Morty, doing each other’s makeup, etc etc. I open my eyes to glance at her once I can't hear the pen anymore. Madison's by the edge of the bed, laying on her stomach and swinging her feet back and forth in the air. She's admiring her work, or maybe critiquing it as she scribbles a part of the drawing out. I'm drawn to the way her slender fingers hold the pen tightly. "Would you ever want a tattoo?" She asks, with a soft voice like she's scared to penetrate the silence in the room. "Mm.. yeah, why not? I just don't have the time to go out and get one." I say, turning my head to give her my full attention. I examine the thoughtful look on her face as she gives her drawing another look. "Now's a good time, right?" She turns her head to me. Her eyes flicker over my face, taking in every feature as if searching for something. "I dunno, mads. I hate needles and I don't think you have any tattooing experience.." My thoughts were cut off by her scooting beside me. I feel my heart rate increasing slightly. I've always been a little scared of needles, but the thought of getting a tattoo from Madison
 That's different. "Take off your shirt." She says, so demanding I almost want her to keep directing me. I watch her lips move when she speaks. They're glossy and perfect. God, I'm soaked. Okay but seriously, what? Like, huh? "What..??" I say out loud this time. I can feel my heart beating. Definitely faster than it was a few minutes ago. She gives me a look like- 'I'm not repeating what I said,' so I just do it. I'm not fully exposed, i still have a bra, but it stills feels weird. Like, forbidden for your friend to see you almost naked. But I kinda like it. The shirt had some random indie rock band on it that I couldn't care to listen to. Can't tell you the name since I threw the shirt on the floor. Whatever, who needs shirts when Madison Beer is telling you to take yours off.
She straddles me right after successfully pulling my shorts down long enough so that they're now low rise and I swear I'm going to have a heart attack. I feel her thighs rest on the sides of me and not to mention her slowly lowering herself down on me? I think I just saw the light. I swear I could cum right now from the view of her on top of me. Madison's eyes rake over my bare skin, and I can feel myself blushing under her gaze. She grabs some chunky ass pen from somewhere on my bed and the piece of mail she was sketching on before. She also puts on some gloves. "Don't worry, you're in good hands," Madison says, sensing the worried look on my face. She traces a medium sized image in the bottom right area of my waist. It kinda tickles. I have goosebumps. While she traces the image on my midriff in pen with one hand, another is laying right below my bra. If only she would move her hand up just a little bit, rip the cloth right off and jump my bones right here, right now. She looks up and scans my face, her lashes flicking up and down with her eyes. "Gosh, y/n, you're so red.." She smiles smugly. "Gosh, Mads, you're so annoy-" I gasp quick, feeling a kind of quick pricking, or a burning sensation on my midriff. My gaze falls on the chunky tattoo pen shes holding in the air. "don't move." Her voice was low, a bit raspy maybe, as she focused on my skin, dropping her hand and the pen back down on the outline. I would let out a guttural moan at the sound of her voice if it was socially acceptable between friends. "Maddie, seriously, go easy on me. This hurts like hell.." I whine, no lie I'm being dramatic about it. "It would hurt a lot less if you shut your pretty mouth and stopped moving. Maybe like, 15% less.. 20%, give or take." "only 20..?" Pouting, I swoop some hair out of her face so she doesn't fuck up my perfect skin if she can't see. Minutes, or maybe an hour passed of Madison tattooing me and she was finally finished. She fully sat up to admire her work while caressing up my waist and around the tattoo. Her fingers trace gently along my skin, sending small electric shocks through my body. It's like she's mapping me out, learning every curve and scar. The butterflies in my stomach were having a boxing match and I swear with how silent it was she could definitely hear them. I shiver involuntarily under her touch and she notices. Hazel eyes snap to mine and with a provocative smirk she leans in close to the shell of my ear. Her warm breath on my ear mirrors the warmth I feel growing in my panties. She leers, enjoying the effect she's having on me. Her hand continues to explore my body, skimming across my ribs. "What's the matter? Can't handle a little teasing?"
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puppyeared · 1 year ago
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if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified
#if it isnt already anyway.. i can see it happening as a school frosh thing. idk if it would catch on as a workplace thing#i kind of find the concept of being locked in with strangers and working to find a way out weirdly exhilarating though#at least compared to icebreakers cause i dont have to spend 10 minutes racking my brain for something to blurt out abt myself#as a bonus u could like. put people into groups and give prizes to whoever escapes first second third etc. apparently they also do themed#escape rooms.. maybe let people pick a theme? or voluntary sign up? actually this would be really fun for smth like a blind friend date#although if i found out i was locked in a room with an online friend id be too excited to actually escape LOL#ive never done an escape room before so sadly i cant speak from experience. its like up there on things i want to try next to rug tufting#workshop and visiting new art exhibits or conventions. i seriously need to get out more if it wasnt for the horrors <- school and anxiety#i was planning to invite cass to a drop-in art workshop in town but neither of us could go bc typography is making us go thru hell and back#AND THEY HAD A BUTTON MACHINE TOO#im nostalgic bc i miss working in groups and not being awkward abt it or worrying abt schedule conflicts#i realized that i learn best in groups and its a little corny but i like sharing ideas and talking through a problem#in elementary i could just sit down with friends for review and come out of it energized *and* more familiar with the material#and i could technically still do it now. but as adults we're more picky abt who we work with on top of being way more busy outside school#maybe im lonely. im shy and grew up not talking to ppl unless i absolutely have to so its hard to make friends on my own i guess#only thing getting me thru it is telling myself that humans like helping and that my cringe is overblown in my head. but its hard#hence the escape rooms. i have been able to talk to 2(!!) people though!! mostly abt school stuff but im glad to be on friendly terms#i dont really know how to be happy these days cause im constantly scaring myself abt my portfolio and finding places to work#not being ambitious is part of not wanting to put energy into something that wont work out while also not having the passion to do literall#anything else.. i should probably talk to my counsellor ugh#yapping
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si0writes · 2 months ago
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Just had this that I drew up over about 13 hours of work put up to block light (as it’s covering a window that has no shutters/shades on it) so if anyone tells you I’m not the biggest neuvillette fan they’re LYING
v clearer pic v
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Unsure on the full measurements (I didn’t cut the fabric my grandfather who put it up for me did for context) but it’s almost half a meter wide or so about your standard door size + half! It’s up about 3 meters? I can’t reach it for shit LOL
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carpisuns · 2 years ago
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theOrEticalLy . if I opened commissions at some point. would there be. a smackerel of interest . ??
#i have never opened them bc it’s intimidating and I don’t know how to price things!!#but mostly bc i work full time w a good salary so I don’t really need side things to make money#like it feels selfish to suggest that people should pay me to make fanart?? When#a) I already do that for free bc i enjoy it lol#and b) there are so many creators out there who are struggling to make ends meet#and I am privileged enough to generally not have to worry about that#this would be just like extra spending money to fund my scented candle habit DHDJDN#and the clothes I just bought while trying to Discover My Vibe and Finally Be Myself (at age 28 lol)#also tbh it would likely be reinvested in other commissions bc I buy commissions fairly often lol#anyway. idk the idea of commissions always sounded cool but also guilt inducing and scary#it feels weird and silly bc it would make me have to take my art seriously if that makes sense??#like me saying ‘I think I’m good enough at art that people would buy it from me.’ that feels so bold and like. arrogant or something dhjsjd#coming from me I mean. just a silly little guy who still struggles to draw human limbs properly#ok I’m thinking about how I’d have to make a commission sheet and put a dollar sign on my art and I’m aaaaaaa#and I’d have to execute exactly what people want and what if I can’t!!!#omg ok maybe noT help lol#well im not committing to anything rn im simply. asking a question while the dash is asleep and then running off to bed seeya#i think part of me always wanted to try commissions to see if I could be a Real Artist about it ??#and potentially end up with like. Portfolio pieces ??#why I would need an art portfolio I don’t know. I am an editor. What do I think I will be doing here#ppl left comments on my animatic that have been giving me crazy what if thoughts. sit down#don’t look at me#ohhh swirly brain thoughts I need to sleep
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beastsovrevelation · 9 months ago
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I said I have 4 storylines of Good Omens fanfiction (including the Crossover with Legion). Had I said that today, I would've lied. There's five.
["Diary entry" under the cut, so there's no litany on an unwilling scroller's feed]
NOTE: I haven't seen S2 of GO, not do I intendt to, so beware of canon divergence
Well... The 5th one is less a coherent storyline, more a concept. I was playing Gardenscapes, and suddenly thought "What if F!Crowley were my Antichrist's mother?"
You know, maybe Crowley owed Satan a new Antichrist, or something. I guess, she'd have screwed up this one, too... Well, she'll gladly take over the world, she just won't destroy it.
The conversation (between myself and myself) went about like this:
Me: ...
Also me: what if?..
Me: for fuck's sake, not again
Also me: Lady Crowley...
Me: please stop
Also me: Was Maxine's mother?
Me: whyever would she be her mother?
Also me: because she owed Satan for the ruined Apocalypse, and had to carry the next Antichrist
Me: Maxine doesn't want the Apocalypse, she's a sane politician
Also me: works for Crowley
Me: she also has black hair and blue eyes
Also me: Satan has black hair and blue eyes, Benedict's not his faceclaim, anyway
Me: fine, why would her last name be Frost?
Also me: Satan goes by Lucian Frost on Earth
Me: why would he ever go by the surname Frost?
Also me: a not to Dante's Inferno
Me: I hate you
Also me: đŸ€Ș
Me: you're killing me
Also me: with pleasure 😊
[End dialogue.]
Now, like I always do with any new idea, I of course collapsed down into the daydreaming pit, which often turns fanfiction, and original stories alike, into Tolkien-level complex universes you'd need a lifetime to fully explore.
I thought, it could be funny. When Max meets Anathema and Newt's daughter Agnes in Oxford, they can bond over their unhinged families.
"You'll probably think my parents are weird as fuck, they have a pet raccoon they dye black, and pretend is a cat."
"Honey, no, I get you. My mother mentally abuses her house plants, and wears sunglasses at midnight."
Rich people things, I guess. I mean, they're both nepo babies, who would ask questions about why their families are weird. Who would ask questions about why a rising star politician's mother mentally abuses her house plants.
There's a lot of potential for comedy. Crowley's issues with her sister-in-law, for example. Satan and Michael... They have a strange dynamic. The last time they spoke to each other is mentioned in the Book of Jude. But, they both have the familia ante omnia, blood is everything mentality. They support each other's political aim. They would kill for each other. And, Michael feels very protective (possessive, even) over her niece (the family mediator, why do you think she's a perfect diplomat). It would annoy the Hell (Heaven?) out of Crowley. Still, in the end, she and Michael would probably kill for each other, also.
I'd imagine Satan forbidding any contact with his disowned son... I don't know. In my fanfictions (where he is a thing), Maxine and Adam usually do have eventual contact, and consider themselves siblings (do keep in mind, though, Max would always choose her father over her brother). Satan doesn't mind her not wanting the Apocalypse, as long as she's loyal to him. He sees good points in her arguments against. He never really cared for it, anyway, it was mostly the armies.
Also... Maxine rides horses, ever since she was a child. Crowley doesn't get along with animals, everyone knows that. But. She's the nightmare equestrian mom (think soccer mom, only worse - much worse). How does she get along with Max's animals?.. Well, Titan (the hellhound) actually likes her. Ulysses (the horse) tolerates her. Horus (the falcon - yes, Max's so posh she's in the falconry hobby)... I have no idea. He'd probably sit on her shoulder, sometimes. But, Crowley's anxious around him, since snakes aren't usually friends with raptors.
At first, I thought about conflict between Crowley and Maxine. For example, her refusing to ride in the Bentley, because she (every author must place pieces of them in their characters) despises Queen. But... I don't like writing that. I like writing loving, healthy relationships between mothers and daughters. So, it's more "What do you mean you're bad at being a demon? You caused the Fall of Humankind. None of them can compare to you", and"You'll be the perfect Secretary-General of the United Nations, honey". We love mothers and daughters supporting each other here. ❀
I even thought of cute scenarios, like Crowley coiling in Max's crib, because she's anxious, and wants to protect her baby.
Max is fiercely protective of Crowley. That's why she'd be in conflict with Beelzebub - funny enough, for a similar season to the other stories (Beelzebub causes the death of her adoptive mother, after she realizes she's raising the Antichrist). Beelzebub hates Crowley, and the Beast of Rev. will show her very sharp teeth, should someone threaten her mom. Satan's on his family's side, don't worry.
Actually... You know why this story is cool? Horrific things happen to Crowley in my other fics. Not this one. Actually, she's doing great. She's the Queen of Hell. Damn... She'd outrank Beelzebub. She could terrorize... Her? Like I said, I haven't seen S2, Ι don't know the pronouns, and I don't care, you can get them right if it matters to you (I just know in S2 an actress from Bridgerton played her (?)).
As for Satan/Crowley... As long at Crowley's female, I don't mind it. I like it. Good for you, you little serpent tempter. Because, you know I always romanticise the Devil.
Have I any ideas for smut? You bet I do. I even have crack ideas... You know that picture of a female wolf protecting a male wolf's throat? Think that, but Crowley's coiled around Satan in her snake form, and snaps at anyone who wanders close.
So, I let this out into the web. Now I'll have to actually do it. Wish me luck. 😑
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hotwaterandmilk · 1 year ago
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Questions are being taken until after episode 8 airs!
Thank goodness someone already asked about the necklace so I don't have to do it myself. I enjoyed all the questions about Kongming's headwear logistics and Maezono Keiji's shorts too.
A+ great show, great fandom, great thighs on Sekiguchi Mandy.
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supercantaloupe · 2 years ago
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it'd probably be a terrible idea but i kind of wish i was healthy enough to audition for one of the military bands. tee bee aych.
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medicinemane · 4 months ago
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I once was talking with my pharmacy manager about... democracy, about how while there's plenty of stupid people in the world we'd all probably prefer didn't vote, that it was very very hard to actually make a line that makes sure only wise people vote while keeping all the idiots out
And I basically said to him "think of all the doctors and pharmacists you know who are smart, well educated people, who you 100% don't think make good choices"
From the look and his face, I'd say that spoke to him (it's incredible how many smart idiots there are in the world, isn't it?)
Anyway, I make that point because it much more addresses the whole concept of... lets call it democracy of the fit
Like it sounds great till you actually take even one second to think about it. It's almost like trying to draw any line in the sand for who it's ok to disenfranchise is not only dumb and ineffective, but also super dangerous. Ah man, I'm sorry, you scored too low on this test which happens behind closed doors and is graded by my political ally... it's not like you disagreeing with me had anything to do with that
(I'd hope we don't even need to touch on why the idea that testosterone levels are a really stupid useless way to decide who gets to vote, cause if that's true then we don't even have to disenfranchise anyone, we can just give out steroids and have the best country in the world... or is it only naturally produced T that makes you a free thinker?)
oh hey just in case anyone who left twitter is wondering how things are going over there
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last night elon tweeted a 4chan screenshot (with bonus antisemitic text in the OP image) advocating for only “high status males” in government and the implied repeal of women’s suffrage. Cool cool cool
#as if elon musk is a free thinker instead of someone that gets lead around by the nose nonstop#and seriously; you'll forgive me if I give hormone levels absolutely zero credit when it comes to intellectual inner workings#...mhh... I'm reminded of someone I know who was talking to me and saying he thought that low testosterone#was causing him to have trouble focusing on things#and it's like... my dude...#you have ADHD; just the other day you were talking to me about when you were younger and spent years talking to a therapist about this#and how they had you on medications to help you with your ADHD... and... you're not on any meds right now#perhaps you less need testosterone and more need... your ADHD meds#but to be clear; this is the guy I'll refer to sometimes on here as Dr Jekyll and Mr Dumbass#cause he's capable of being either real smart; or saying the stupidest edgy shit you've ever seen#...and... I honestly feel like there's a strong correlation between which of those he is and how much weed he's been smoking#but like... people get way to fixated on estrogen and testosterone... especially dudes getting fixated on... well... both of those actually#'the soy has too much estrogen; it'll make me a woman' that's... that's not how any of this fucking works#'if I just got on testosterone everything would be cured for me' often... you hear those ads and they talk about stuff like hair loss#I had a teacher in high school who was bald specifically cause he had too much testosterone#he was quite literally a big bearded bald mountain man; lived up in the mountains with no running water#would come into town on his motorcycle and shower at the YMCA and then taught at our school; everyone still to this day loves him#real great teacher in a lot of ways... and I think he'd be the first to say you're stupid of you think his testosterone is what makes him#people are their choices and their thoughts and their actions; not just a readout of hormones#just such an idiotic shit show of an idea on how the world works#'oh lets just have a council of high testosterone men... and autistic' my dude you're being fucking weird and fucking stupid#I'd love if only people with good ideas could vote; but there's literally no way to make that happen#and lets be blunt that no one would agree on what that looks like; and in the end that's called a dictatorship#where a select group of people who are so smart that they'll always vote for the leader has a sham democracy#so we're not doing that; and since we're not doing that I'm just telling you that there's no way to weed out stupid voters#and again; T levels is the stupidest of them all; cause if that's true just give everyone steroids#this is just so stupid; and it's being said by someone who can't even understand how stupid they are#(which... is most people who spout alpha bullshit; which anyone who knows anything knows alpha stuff in wolves was dropped)#(and the person who said this actually has no value was the person who put forward the idea)#(realized his model was messed up by the situation the captive wolves were in and it wasn't actually true in the larger world)
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practically-an-x-man · 1 year ago
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dogsitting lady. is not listening to me
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4unnyr0se · 6 months ago
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Haikyuu characters catching you masterbating ?
❄ caught ya! | haikyuu guys catching you pleasuring yourself
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warnings: timeskip! characters, fem! reader mentions of masturbation (duh), jealously, fingering, teasing, voyeurism, toy usage, lewd language
MDNI | 18+ content
word count -> 650
a/n: hopefully i assigned the characters correctly
got a request? my asks are open!
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❄ They think it's cute
He walks in on you, knuckle-deep in your soaked pussy, panties hastily pushed aside as you plunge your fingers into your dripping heat over and over again. You were too preoccupied with fucking yourself on your fingers that you didn’t even notice how the door to your bedroom closed, your boyfriend crossing his arms in amusement as he leaned against your dresser. He observes how his name falls from your lips like a broken prayer, your nose sniffling pathetically as you try too hard to rip an orgasm out of you. But sadly, your fingers were no match for his own, and they never will be. You squealed in delight as you finally hit that sweet spot that you so craved, only to have your moment of bliss interrupted by your boyfriend's gentle cooing.
“Did my baby miss me while I was working, hm? Don’t worry, sweet thing. I’ll just stand here and watch. Go on, try to make yourself cum without my help. You’re so fucking adorable, my precious angel.”
SUGAWARA, kuroo, yaku, ennoshita, UKAI, semi, hanamaki, kenma, OSAMU, kita
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❄ They think it's stupid
He hears your oh-so-familiar moans behind your shared bedroom and busts in without a second thought. Who the hell was ripping those perfect noises from your pretty lips without his permission? Why, was it you, of course! A bullet vibration practically danced on your throbbing clit while your legs were spread like a slut, your slit drenching the innermost part. Your perfectly manicured hand squeezed your breast, your thumb rolling over your nipple whilst your pearly whites bit down on your bottom lip, hips bucking into the air on occasion. His eyes filled with fury as he ripped the vibrator off your clit, earning an annoyed moan from your slutty mouth.
“What the fuck is this, hm? You seriously couldn’t wait for me to get back so I could fuck you? Who the hell needs this stupid toy when you have me? That’s it. Get on all fours. Right now, don’t fucking test me.”
kageyama, TSUKISHIMA, kyoutani, IWAIZUMI, atsumu, suna, sakusa, ushijima, daichi
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❄ They're completely starstruck
Oh, fuck. They have absolutely no idea what to do. He’s fantasized about this so much, and it’s finally fucking happening. He caught you bouncing on a dildo you had bought yourself, whimpering as the silicone head hit every spot so perfectly deep inside your gummy walls. His eyes landed on your pretty fingers, desperately swirling your clit, beads of sweat flying off your forehead. You looked so fucking ethereal, he had to say something. He just had to let you know how fucking pretty you looked!
“Holy fuck, you look so fucking pretty. Can you keep going for me, please? I wanna see you cum over and over again, please, baby girl. I’ll fuck you as much as you want, just put on a good show for me. God, you’re perfect.”
HINATA, yamaguchi, asahi, GOSHIKI, oikawa, akaashi, takeda, TANAKA
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❄ They join you
His ears perk up once he hears you mewling in pleasure from your bedroom, eagerly slamming the door open to reveal your hands fucking a vibrating bullet in and out of your weeping cunt, the sheets beneath you a filthy mess. He smirks and practically pounces on the bed, not even bothering to shut the door as he peppers your face in a million kisses. You always look so pretty when you wanna get yourself off. What if he fucked his fist in tandem with you? That's the best idea ever.
“Shit, don’t stop just for me, baby. Let’s cum at the same time, yeah? You wanna fuck yourself with that cute bullet I got you while I fuck my fist to the sight of your pretty tits? C’mon, don’t say no! It’ll be fun, I promise! Then I’ll fuck you nice and good afterward, okay? Thank you, pretty baby.”
nishinoya, BOKUTO, konoha, matsukawa, TENDOU, terushima, yamamoto, lev
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foldingfittedsheets · 4 months ago
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I am a little creature largely made up of anxieties. There have been times in my life when it was worse. It’s currently significantly better. This story takes place at a time when it was pretty bad.
Food was a prison for me. I moved out early with very little idea of how to feed or care for myself. Every meal was a question mark. For three years I had Brendan doing most of the cooking but when things ended between us I moved in with some other friends. I suddenly had no way to feed myself again.
I was working at the sex shop and living with all my coworkers; a premise that would make sitcom writers weep. In that house, at the age of 24, I learned how to fry an egg. It was the only thing I knew how to do but by god, I mastered egg frying. I was so proud. I could now have one stress free meal a day of an egg on toast.
The problem was my roommates. Living with three other people is already tough but messes pile up alarmingly fast, especially in the kitchen. No one sees the whole mess as their responsibility but the one person who’s responsibility it absolutely wasn’t was mine, as I only ever cooked eggs. Glaciers moved quicker than the dishes got done, mountains of greasy unwashed dish ware were fixtures across the counters.
My friends occasionally cooked for me and each time I happily cleaned all the resulting dishes. This seemed fair.
But on my own I only used three implements for my egg. When I finished with my spatula, pan, and plate, I carefully washed them and set them to dry. Every time I came back to the kitchen there was nothing clean.
Crusted on ketchup, dried food, and unsavory residues plagued everything I needed to touch. So I ended up doing all the dishes twice, once to use my three implements and again once I was done.
I started to realize I’d come home, see the filthy pile of dishes, then go to bed without eating because I didn’t have the energy to wash it all. So I finally addressed my roommates about it. Please, I beseeched them, can these three things always be clean. I cannot function like this, and eating is already hard for me.
The answer returned: no. My request was deemed unreasonable and a counteroffer was made to turn off the small space heater I ran in my room in exchange for them magnanimously cleaning up after themselves. I declined, as my bones ached with cold everywhere except my room since no one else wanted the heat on. The impasse continued. I went to be hungry.
I noodled on it. I schemed. I plotted. And on my day off I went to a thrift shop and acquired a nice little pan and spatula. I squirreled them away into my closet. The plan was just to wash and dry it after meals and keep it in my room.
This is not how it went down. On day one of my pan coming home one of my roommates popped into my room to chat, glanced into my three quarters shut closet and immediately said, “What is that?”
I sighed and admitted my plan. All three roommates roundly condemned my plan as extremely passive aggressive. I tried once again to explain that I wasn’t eating, but my secret pan was now a source of contention, a precious resource held back from the collective.
Their discontent reached a fever pitch and I finally declared, “Fine! I will put my pan in the kitchen. On one condition. If I ever find this pan dirty, ever, I will scrape whatever is left on it into your bedding. I swear to god, if I ever come home to it being dirty there will be a reckoning.”
Terms were agreed.
The first month or two went okay. On the third month I awoke to eat breakfast and found my precious pan sullied. I grabbed it and marched upstairs. Betty was named as the culprit. I strode into Betty’s room and stood over her sleeping form like the vengeful ghost of dishes past.
“If you don’t get up and clean this right now I’m going to dump it on your bed.”
Betty groggily regarded me. “Seriously?”
“I have never been more serious.”
“It’s one time, can’t you just clean it yourself?”
“No. You promised.”
With much huffing and grousing Betty arose from bed and tromped downstairs, hastily cleaning my pan while I watched. “Happy?” She demanded.
I was. I made my egg, cheerfully cleaning the pan afterward, leaving it to dry.
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ellecdc · 2 months ago
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i have a small idea! (this totes bounced off that one poly!marauders pregnancy post)
sirius would absolutely find comfort laying on readers belly later on in her pregnancy animagus styleđŸŸ
I loved this! you must've read my mind; yesterday I was considering sending out a request for any pregnant!reader or dad!marauders prompts!
poly!marauders x pregnant!reader who Padfoot is obsessed with [1.4k words]
CW: fem afab!reader, pregnancy, discourse regarding shower temperatures
“Wait, so, explain to me why you can’t both just take a shower together?” Remus asked as he followed Sirius and James into the flat, the two boys having argued nearly the whole way home from the shops over who was going to get to shower first.
Sirius made a derisive scoffing sound as if Remus had asked something particularly ridiculous. 
“Remus.” He muttered like he was talking to a troublesome toddler. “My hair and skin are only as beautiful as they are because I don’t scald myself under water heated by hellfire.” 
“My showers are not that hot, Pads.” James argued, though Remus could hear the smile in his voice. 
“My gods.” Sirius breathed out. “It’s starting to affect your brain cells too.” 
James made an offended sound and swatted at Sirius. “Fine, out with you then; go take your freezing shower, but don’t come looking for me for cuddles when you can’t stop shivering.” 
“I’d sooner find Moons for warm cuddles.” Sirius responded haughtily. “Those werewolf genes keep him nice and warm.”
Remus hummed in acknowledgement. “Dove may just have me beat there soon.” 
All three boys took a moment to sigh lovingly at the thought of you; growing and stretching and likely more than a little uncomfortable but doing it so gracefully nonetheless. 
“Sirius if you’re just going to sit here with hearts in your eyes
” James started, though he didn’t need to finish his threat when Sirius turned and took off in the direction of the shower.
“You do come out of the shower a little pink, love.” Remus murmured into the side of James’ face once he knew Sirius was out of earshot. 
James scoffed but leaned into Remus’ embrace. “How does he know that hot showers aren’t how I get my hair and skin so beautiful?” 
“Fair enough.” Remus laughed before he moved to put the groceries away. “But I don’t want Y/N getting into any showers with you; we don’t want her blood pressure rising.” 
James hummed in agreement. “But you may have to tell her that; her showers are equally steamy.” 
“Okay,” Remus agreed, “family meeting tonight about appropriate shower temperatures.” 
The two worked through the kitchen in relative silence before James slowed in his movements; dark brows furrowing behind his wire frames. “Speaking of showers, I don’t hear one running.” 
“Did he seriously fight you for dibs over the shower and then not get into the shower?” Remus laughed, causing James to stalk down the hall muttering something under his breath along the lines of “stupid no good sodding handsome boyfriend, going to be the death of me”. 
Remus waited for the inevitable yelp when James startled Sirius from behind, digging his fingers into his ribs in punishment.
He waited for the two of them to start trading insults - far louder than necessary - that quickly divulged into heated kisses where they pressed each other up against various solid surfaces.
Except no yelps, no tickles, no insults, and no passion could be heard.
In fact, it was quiet
too quiet. 
“Is there some weird portal in the flat that my partners keep disappearing through or something?” Remus called as he moved in the direction of the bedroom. “And where’s dovey?” 
But the answer only came when Remus rounded the corner into their bedroom - nearly colliding with James who had paused just inside the doorway - to find you asleep, curled up on your side in bed with a placid looking Padfoot curled up behind you and his head resting on your waist; your ever growing bump (that you’ve insisted cannot possibly grow anymore) dutifully under his chin.
Remus made an affectionate tsking sound as he took in the sight. “Did you get distracted, Pads?” And the dog’s tail began thumping loudly against the bed, though Remus could tell Padfoot was working very hard to not move his body in any other way lest he disturb you. 
The three of you always joked that whatever Sacred 28 gene allowed Pureblood's to appear impassive, bored, and to expertly save face was absent in Sirius, who never bothered hiding a single one of his emotions; the way he was feeling always displayed loudly and proudly on his face, though he claimed that was by choice rather than design.
But for as expressive or closed off as Sirius could or couldn’t be, Padfoot didn’t have a poker face to save his life.  
An almost embarrassing coo left James’ lips as he made his way to the bed, kneeling carefully on the edge of the bed so as to not disturb you, before reaching over to place a hand on your bump.
Padfoot, for his part, snapped his jaw playfully at James, pretending to bite his wrist only to then lick his arm aggressively when James diverted his loving caress to the top of his head instead. 
“She’s been so tired lately.” James murmured to no one in particular once Padfoot seemed appeased and he moved his hand to push some hair back from your forehead. 
“You try building an entire new person from scratch.” Remus chuckled quietly, moving to stand behind James but pausing when Padfoot’s head shot up.
The canine stared down at your midsection with his ears standing straight up in the air before tilting his head comically at a nearly 90 degree angle.
James laughed, making a breathy ‘wha-’ sound when Padfoot’s head snapped in the other direction, snout still pointed dutifully at your stomach. 
The dog let out a quiet whimper and pressed his wet nose into your side, causing James to laugh and Remus to tsk chidingly at him for risking waking you up.
“Is he kicking, Pads?” James asked then, moving his hand to the now damp spot on your shirt from where Padfoot poked you so rudely as the dog’s tail thumped excitedly on the bed. 
“Please.” Remus scoffed playfully as he reached forward to place his hand next to James’. “Don’t you mean she?”
“They” you corrected suddenly - though your eyes remained closed - as your boyfriends (two human and one currently canine) hovered around your midsection “are lucky they’re so loved when they’re currently using my ribs as a kick drum.” Your breath hitching in time with James and Remus’ hands feeling a strong thump and Padfoot’s head tilting the other direction. 
“Awe, I’m sorry, angel.” James cooed as he pressed a kiss to your forehead.
“You should be.” You grumbled, though Remus could see the faint upturn in the corner of your lips. “It’s your fault.”
“My fault?” James shrilled. 
You hummed in agreement. “They were very well behaved before you showed up.”
“How do you know it’s not Moony’s fault?”
You cracked one eye open to look at Remus who simply winked at you. 
“Just do.” 
“Pads?” James tried then.
“If it was Sirius, I would say the chances were equal.” You admitted as you settled back into the pillow. “But baby is well behaved for Padfoot.” 
“Well
” James started, looking helplessly between his partners. “Well this is just not fair.”
You let out a groan and shoved your face into the pillow at the interruption of your nap when Remus finally took pity on you.
“Wasn’t someone supposed to be showering?” 
James looked over at Padfoot who simply stared back at him before letting out a long sigh and resting his head back down on your belly. He wasn’t going anywhere.
“Looks like there’s been a change of plans, Jamie.” Remus translated. 
“Fine.” James grumbled, though Remus could tell his ire was only for show. “Do you wanna join me, Moons?” 
“I showered this morning.” Remus declined as he took James’ spot next to you on the bed.
“I’ll shower with you, Jamie.” You offered as you went to rise, pausing when all three boys protested. 
Well, James and Remus protested. Padfoot let out a bark. 
“You should rest, angel.”
“Leave Jamie to his hellfire showers.” Remus agreed. “I’ll run you a bath after dinner, how does that sound?” 
Apparently that sounded lovely, because you easily fell back into your pillows with a smile on your face, a dog resting its head on your stomach, and Remus rubbing his thumb lovingly against your temple.
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