#I say I’m grieving my first car like it died

[bugsybaritone]

I know I dont post my art on here a lot, mainly because when I do post it I don’t get any notes BUT I made a self portrait recently that is very meaningful to me and I want to share it with as many people as I can. Scroll past the pictures to get an explanation of why I chose this as my final for my drawing class this semester!

TW: fake blood

Back in January I was in a car accident that totaled my car, thankfully I walked away almost entirely unharmed except for a single 1-2mm laceration on my head. Despite walking away perfectly fine with no lasting physical effects this accident has stuck with me and even now I can barely talk about certain details without crying. For days following it I still felt like I was covered in glass and blood, it took me weeks to stop seeing it every time I closed my eyes and I still have nightmares about it. I miss my old car and in a way I’m grieving the loss of it alongside my trust in other drivers.

For my portrait I decided to capture the raw emotion of it: the sadness, grief, and anger that this happened to me. I chose to portray what I looked like when it happened, so I put the outfit that I hadn’t touched since I peeled it off in the hospital on for the first time in months. I used to love that outfit and now I can’t bear looking at it. I sat down in front of my camera, set a countdown and closed my eyes thinking about that day. Thinking about how in a matter of seconds my first car was ruined and I was longer an accident free driver, about how it felt when it finally sunk in ten seconds after it happened and what it was like looking through my windshield silently asking the people I could see in their cars through their windshields what I should do. There’s dozens of moments from that day that I sat there remembering to get the reference photo for this drawing, it was hard to not only make myself relive it for a picture but also to draw it as well.

This isn’t the first drawing I’ve made related to the accident and I don’t think it will be the last.

[impishtubist]

I came across yet another tweet that screamed Sirius raising Harry to me and demanded a ficlet. For @soloorganaas because I can.

(Removed all identifying info from the tweet so no one goes and tweets about HP at some poor unsuspecting person)

---

Harry Potter is subdued today when his papa drops him off for school. Mrs. Carter watches as Mr. Lupin crouches in front of Harry, speaking to him in low tones while Harry nods morosely.

When he leaves, Harry sits quietly at his desk, coloring on a piece of paper and not looking up at his classmates as they trickle in. He’s usually one of the most talkative students in the class, so Mrs. Carter goes over to him.

“Harry,” she says quietly as she kneels next to him, “are you feeling okay?”

“No,” Harry says, not looking at her. “My daddy died.”

Mrs. Carter barely catches her gasp before it slips out. “Oh, Harry, I am so sorry. You must be feeling very sad.” 

Harry nods. Mrs. Carter can’t believe that Mr. Lupin dropped Harry off without saying anything to any of his teachers about this! Of course, he’s been married to Mr. Black for six years now, or so he’d mentioned at the last parent-teacher conference. He must be in a state of absolute shock himself.

She spends the rest of the day loving on Harry as best as she can while her aides help manage the rest of the class. She gives him extra hugs, excuses him from certain activities that he’s not feeling up to, and slips him an extra biscuit at snack time when the other students aren’t paying attention. They’re paltry efforts at comfort, but they seem like the least she can do.

She plans to have a discreet word with Mr. Lupin at pickup, and to gently suggest that maybe Harry should stay home from school for a few days, to be with his family and properly grieve.

Unfortunately, it’s not Mr. Lupin who picks Harry up--it’s Mr. Black.

“Hey, squirt!” Mr. Black says cheerfully as Harry launches himself at him. He catches the boy and swings him up on his shoulders. “Guess what I’ve got in the car for you?”

“A Happy Meal?”

“You got it,” Mr. Black says, and Harry cheers. “Say goodbye to your teacher, love.”

“Bye, Mrs. Carter!”

“But,” Mrs. Carter manages, “Harry said you died!”

Mr. Black blinks at her, and then pulls Harry off his shoulders. 

“Harry,” he says, setting the boy on the ground. “Did you tell your teachers that your daddy died? Again?”

“Again?”

“Sorry, Daddy,” Harry says, not sounding sorry at all. 

Mr. Black shakes his head as he takes Harry’s hand. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Carter. Harry’s done this with all his teachers at some point or another. We thought he’d grown out of it.” 

“I don’t understand,” Mrs. Carter says.

“His birth father, James, died when he was a baby. You know that, but he also calls me “Dad”. So sometimes he’ll tell a teacher that his dad died, because he’s learned it gets him extra attention and snacks. He means James, but he’s going to let you believe it’s me because that’s how he gets away with it.” Mr. Black tries to give Harry a stern look, but he’s not very successful at it. “Can you apologize to your teacher, Harry?”

“But it’s true! Daddy James is dead!” 

Mr. Black pinches the bridge of his nose. “We’re still working on it.” 

---

“Moony!” Sirius calls. “You’ll never guess what your son did today!”

“My son?” Remus pokes his head out of his office. “Did he turn his teacher’s hair blue again?”

“Nope. He told her his daddy was dead.”  

“Harry.” Remus folds his arms. “Is this because I wouldn’t stop for ice cream on the way to school?”

“Mrs. Carter gave me an extra biscuit! An’ I didn’t have to do my letters today! Can I have a snack now?”

“You just had a Happy Meal!” Sirius exclaims.

“I’m hungry again!”

“Nice try, squirt. We’re going to say sorry to Daddy James.”

Harry sighs. “Do I have to?”

“Yes, you have to.” Sirius takes him by the shoulders and turns him in the direction of the back door. “Let’s go, mister.”

When they had first moved into this house with baby Harry four years ago, Remus had suggested that they plant two trees in memory of James and Lily. They had done so, and installed small plaques at the base of each one. Sirius found over the years that he much preferred visiting the trees to the horrible memorial in Godric’s Hollow.

“Hi, Daddy James,” Harry is saying when Sirius catches up to him. He’s sitting cross-legged by James’s plaque, twisted some blades of grass together in his hands. “Daddy says I gotta say sorry to you. I told Mrs. Carter you were dead.”

“That’s not why you’re saying sorry, Harry James,” Sirius corrects.

“I told her Daddy died. She didn’t ask which one!” 

“Harry.” 

“Sorry for telling Mrs. Carter you were dead so I could get a biscuit, Daddy James,” Harry says. “An’ extra coloring time. Daddy, can I go fly now?”

“Go wash your hands and change into your flying clothes, and meet me back out here,” Sirius says, and Harry scampers off. Sirius kneels by the plaque, presses two fingers to his lips, and then brushes them over James’s name. “He’s a menace, Prongs. You would be proud. Thank you for trusting me with him."

[liquidcatt]

your boyfriend writes a letter to come to terms with your death

cw: angst, maybe ooc, slight comfort, mention of car accident, grieving process, no happy ending, implied s*icide, lots of tears are shed

My dear Y/N,

It's been a few years since your passing. I struggled to write this so I apologize if it sounds like I’m rambling. I want to get this off my chest right now before I regret not doing it later. 

Before I met you, I was not a fan of Christmas. Like, at all. It brought back memories from my childhood. Memories that reminded me of a different time before life showed its ugly face. Memories that I use to look back on with contempt and melancholy. Memories that honestly I would wish to forget. Memories that basically made me not want anything to do with it at all.

I remember it like it was yesterday: I got invited to an early Christmas party by one of my friends and I saw you being dragged through the crowd by your sister, wanting to introduce me to you. I was aloof with you at first as you weren’t too into the holiday spirit either to even have a casual chat with me. But as we talked, however, I felt myself being drawn to you. Like someone was telling me that you were one. And they were right. Some say it was a slow burn romance in the making, but screw it, I didn’t care. Seeing your face turn bright red when I asked for your number before you left so we could keep contact was the highlight of the night. Honestly it felt like I was in high school all over again; asking the cute girl next to me in class if she wanted to go out with me. I don’t regret that night and I’m glad you didn’t too. 

Every Christmas with you was so different, I was so happy to share it with you. We’d watch all those cheesy Christmas movies and sometimes do little commentaries on how stupid they were. Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” was always blasting on the radio as we drove home from dinner. On certain nights, I’d get into my winter clothes excitedly so we could go outside to see the snowflakes fall from the sky, feeling their wet kisses land on my cheeks. Your family was so fun to be around. Your parents were a little old-fasioned, but I was happy they welcomed me with open arms. I even got to meet some of your young cousins; they were so adorable, I hoped that we would've started a family as well. I will always cherish those memories of you. The memories that made me remember my childhood and how much I took them for granted. I wish I could tell myself that things would get better and that I would find my soulmate. 

But as they say, life showed its ugly face yet again, only this time it took you away from me forever. Your mother woke me up one day, screaming on the phone and told me that you had gotten into a car accident. I can still hear the sound of her crying echo in my mind. I hate it so much. It was raining heavily and they said your car had slipped off the road and crashed into a nearby tree. You died on impact. Seeing your body in the coffin was like something out of a nightmare. It had to be right? My mind kept screaming that you were just asleep and that this wasn’t real. But it was. You were dead. I wanted to console your parents, but I held my tongue and stayed silent. After that, things were never the same.

To ease the pain, I watched all the movies that we use to snuggle together. I’m listening to your favorite Christmas songs over and over again, singing my heart out like you did. The ugly sweater you gave me one year to match yours is still hidden away somewhere in my closet. I have no desire to wear it unfortunately. My friends try their best to cheer me up during this time, like visiting the places you used to frequent and eating at your favorite restaurants. They’d also check up on me to make sure that I don’t do anything stupid. Yeah right. Like I would ever. I’m too much of a coward to even try. I’d visit your family once in a while to chat with them. Your parents told me that I was always welcome in their home, but it does little to heal the gaping wound in my heart. They let me have some of your belongings as they didn’t have the heart to get rid of them. The grief of losing you took a toll and I can see it on their faces. You and your mother look so alike, it was almost like talking to you again. The wrinkles on her face get worse and worse every day. I swear she looks like she had been crying for a long time and I can’t blame her. Your dad is a hard-working man. He worked a lot to make sure you got everything you wanted. And your sister, I never got to thank her for introducing me to you. She has no idea how much I would’ve loved to get married. The more I see them, the more guilt I feel festering in my throat. I feel like I let them down; I felt like I let you down. 

But that’s not what I’m writing this letter though. No, I’m writing this letter to tell you that these past few years were some of the best and I wish that I had more time to spend them with you. The truth is Y/N, you made me love Christmas again. And I miss it so much. I miss you. I miss being excited to see the presents nestled under the tree waiting to be opened. I miss the ornaments on the tree you would decorate as they swayed slightly like they were waving. I miss holding your hand as we walk the streets at dusk admiring the Christmas lights hanging on the houses and shops. I miss making cookies with you even if they didn’t always turn out perfect. I miss falling asleep next to you on the couch as we struggled to stay awake to see Santa. As long as I was with you, everything was okay. You were what Christmas was always about: being with the people you love.

What’s even the point of celebrating it anymore? I know that you would tell me that you wouldn't have wanted this. You’d hold me in your arms cupping my face to wipe away the tears, saying you wouldn't want me to be sad. No way in hell that would you have let me stay cooped up in my room either, shut away from the world. You’d tell me to be happy and remember you in a positive light. You’d want me to celebrate Christmas with everyone who loves and cares about him. But you aren’t here to tell me any of that. You're gone. And I have to accept that.

As I’m writing this, it’s only a few more hours until Christmas. This year has gone by so fast. I bought a small, white cake at the last minute at some store nearby that's open till midnight. It was the cheapest one I could afford as I’m short on cash right now. It’s plain, but simple, just how you would’ve liked it. You didn’t care if anything I bought was expensive or not. 

I still live in the apartment we shared together. This ‘home’ that was once full of radiance and mirth for a time is now replaced with a dark, melancholy ambience. It’s so different without you. I have trouble sleeping because I instinctively turn and expect to see you laying next to me. The other side of the bed is cold, I miss looking at your peaceful face while you slept. I took a picture of the cake and sent it to your family and some of my friends. They all loved it and I’m sure you would’ve too. 

There’s so much more I want to say, but this is all I'm able to get out. If you're looking down from heaven right now, always know that I’ll always keep a piece of you in my heart until my dying day. I love you and that feeling will never change. Merry Christmas Y/N. 

Love you always, Your boyfriend

Kageyama, Tendou, Tsukishima, Akaashi, Suna, Kuroo, Ushijima (+ your fav)

a/n: One of my managers at work had a daughter who died that loved Christmas and it was never the same for her :’(

[theficpusher]

If This Is To End In Fire by Jiksa | E | 4306 Apocalypse makes it sound a lot more glamorous than it actually is.

It's Been a Minute Since I Called You by winterschild | nr | 5336 “Hi, mum. It’s been a minute since I called ya. I know you won’t get this, but I’m going to leave a message anyway.” He didn’t want to feel alone. In order to cope with grief, Louis has been paying for his mum's phone so he can leave her voicemails to calm him down. One day, when he forgets to pay her bill, the number disconnects and is later given to Harry Styles, a baker with a kind heart. On a drunken night, Louis leaves another voicemail, but how will Harry respond to this man, who sounds so broken? OR This is a self-indulgent, Louis centric fic about grief and a very kind person who takes concern for the small Doncaster boy with a somewhat broken heart.

Always Keep You Next To Me by lululawrence | nr | 8325 Louis jumped when the passenger side door opened and Greg somehow folded his entire lanky frame into the car. “Hey, thanks for waiting for me,” Greg said with a small smile before buckling up. “Do I get the honor?” Right. Louis couldn’t drive safely with Will’s remains in his arms. It was just ever since his mom had handed the urn over to him last night, he hadn’t been able to bring himself to let it go. He’d even curled up around it on Will’s childhood bed as he called his cell over and over again, just to hear his voice once more. Fuck. When Louis' twin dies, Louis decides to take the birthday road trip they were meant to take together with Will's best friend Greg instead. As they both mourn Will's death and celebrate his life, Louis and Greg become closer and maybe start to heal a little bit too.

Keep Driving by dead_tobeginwith | M | 11726 The first time Louis picks him up, it’s raining. He slides into the backseat smelling like hospital, like plasters and cleaning products and burnt coffee. He shuts the door and leans against the window, folding his arms protectively across his chest. He sighs heavily and closes his eyes. There’s a crease between his brows. It must have been a long day. Louis feels it when one of his knobby knees starts bobbing an uneasy rhythm. Bad news, then. Or waiting for bad news. Sometimes purgatory is the worst kind of hell. Either way, he says nothing. Louis watches his breath fog the window in the rearview mirror. When he drops him at the station, there’s a little frowny face fading in the misted glass. _________ OR Louis works as a driver contracted through the local cancer institute. All of his clients are associated with the hospital—mostly patients and their families heading home. One rainy afternoon, he picks up Harry.

You Might Want to Marry My Husband by Rearviewdreamer | nr | 24528 When Harry’s husband dies, he asks one thing of him; to find love and happiness again without him. It’s a request that Harry is happy to disregard, until he meets the one person who is impossible to ignore.

like a timebomb ticking by infinitelymint | M | 31734 Louis loses everything. Harry's still there.

we should open up (before it's all too much) by disgruntledkittenface | M | 43129 “I’m not–” Harry breaks off, his voice strangled as he clutches his phone in his hand. He takes a breath and looks up, trying to keep the tears threatening to spill over at bay. “Louis, I’m not very good company these days. I–” “Harry,” Louis interrupts, his raspy voice soft and soothing. “I get it. Sometimes it’s just easier to be alone, yeah?” Harry nods, blinking back the last of his tears. “But it can get lonely,” Louis states. Harry nods again even though it wasn’t a question, finally looking back at him. “So why don’t we try being alone, together?” Struggling with grieving and depression since his dad died, Harry has never felt so alone. It’s too much to cope with on his own, but he feels like a burden when he tries to open up with people. Then he meets Louis.

Plant New Seeds in the Melody by 28sunflowers | E | 58700 After losing his husband in a tragic car accident, the last thing Louis needs is to keep running into popstar Harry Styles, who David was quite fond of. Obviously, that’s exactly what keeps happening. But as their unlikely friendship blossoms, Louis realizes that, maybe, having Harry in his life was the only good thing that came out of his adverse circumstances. Harry could be just the right person to help Louis find trust and intimacy in someone new.

shelter as we go by fondleeds | nr | 75094 Louis looks at him like his words might break him, glass about to splinter, one wrong footfall away from shattering into a million tiny pieces. “Hey,” Harry breathes, and he knows, meeting Louis’ eyes, that his words could break him easy as anything. He almost wants Louis to bring his boot down. - AU. Nova Scotia, 1968.

[goodoldfashionedengineer]

The more often I rewatch Season 1, the more it becomes obvious how Klaus is the Mascot of the family, the family member who diffuses tension with humor. But he also fits the criteria for the avoidant personality type.

Here's my analysis on this:

1.Sensitive to Rejection

People with an avoidant personality try to steer clear of rejection or criticism, because it leaves them emotionally vulnerable. We can see this very well with Klaus. To name a few examples: When Allison points out the rehab wrist band in the first episode of the show, he says “Oh, no, I’m done with all that.” He tries to deny it. We can see this exact same behavior later when he tries to talk himself out of conjuring Reginald. Allison is the one to interrupt, asking if he’s high. When everyone just looks annoyed at that, he springs up, defending himself “How are you not?”.

He knows his addiction is disapproved of by the family, that it will earn him a lecture. In the show we can see this when he tells Luther “Save the lecture” when he leaves Reginald’s office. And when he tries to conjure Reginald, he also says “big angry ghost lecture.” When he smokes in the living room, Luther says “You know dad didn't allow smoking in here.” All of this showcases how he is used to criticism and also his ways in avoiding it.

So, how does he handle actual rejection? Let’s have a look at his and Diego’s dynamic. We have seen multiple times how Diego is on his way to leave, when Klaus says “I’ll come with you.” And even though Diego says no, Klaus doesn't treat it seriously, knowing Diego won’t kick him out. They're siblings.

But later, when he is in the van with Luther and Five, he DOES get kicked out by them. And he MENTIONS this later when they vote on turning off Mom. The reason he is on Diego’s side, at least from what he is saying, is because he’s mad at Luther. “I’m with Diego, because screw you!” And “Get out of the van, Klaus. Well, welcome back to the van, Klaus!” While it is a funny scene, it is proof that rejection sticks with him.

2. Difficulty in creating meaningful relationships

There is a lot of evidence for this one. His prior relationships all seem to have been surface level. He can't remember how he lost his virginity. The longest relationship he had prior to Dave lasted three weeks and even that was only because he was tired of searching for a place to sleep. When he is grieving over Dave with Diego in the car he says that he lost the only person he loved more than himself (Which is not actually the case, there are a lot of points that could disprove that line, but Klaus feels this way and that's what’s important).

Dave was the first push towards his healing journey. He values him so highly, even after years. He places Dave’s well-being over his own with him trying to stop Dave from enlisting into the military in S2, even if it means they’ll never meet. And it is Dave who goes into the kiss.

3. Running away

The stereotypical avoidant character is gruff, pessimistic and oftentimes nihilistic. But Klaus uses humor as a mask. He seems like a flirt, extroverted, light and funny and while this isn’t necessarily false or all a lie, it is still an exaggeration. This is a good example of him being the Mascot of the family.

It is when they are stressed it really shines through. It’s when Dave dies, he decides to go back to 2019. He almost gave up on finding Luther if Ben hadn't said anything.

The drugs are a way to run away from the past, from the pain, from himself, to make everything go numb.

And while he’s not really nihilistic, he can be a bit, for the lack of a better word, pessimistic. He believes that the future can only be bad, evidenced by Five coming back and saying “[The future] is shit, by the way” to which he responds with “Called it!”.

He also dislikes the whole notion of “eternal peace”, saying it’s overrated when he tries to summon Reginald and in S3 saying so to his birth mother in the afterlife.

Also, the whole cult storyline.

4. Conflict Avoidant

While he does cheer on Diego and Luther during their fight at Reginald's funeral, this fight does not involve him. In all other cases, it is really clear once you notice it.

Him being the Mascot of the family already makes this obvious. The tone gets heated? An argument may arise? Throw in a quick joke, draw the attention towards himself. For example, when Luther says how they should bury Reginald by the oak tree because he spent time there sometimes and he says “None of you ever did that?”, the others gave him strange looks. Klaus immediately says something completely unrelated “Will there be any refreshments?”.

He is the only one to suggest “I vote for running!” when the portal through which Five falls through appears.

5. Not sharing problems

He rarely ever shares the trauma he goes through and if ever, he downplays it. This is seen when he comes back from Vietnam and Five points it out, he deflects and says “long night”. He does not say where to, when he answers Five’s questions it is followed with something funny like when he asks for how long “almost a year. [...] which means I’m 10 months older.” Or when he finds out he’s immortal, he says it in a way easily mistaken for a joke and then never brings it up again.

Even when he is vulnerable he shares minimal information. Like when he had a breakdown at the VFW, he tells Diego that he “lost someone” but does not expand. The most open he was was during The Day That Wasn't. Here he talks about Dave, what he was like, that Klaus followed him to the front lines. And Diego doesn't pester him with a lot of questions, which is important here. Klaus is in his thoughts and shares this willingly. It is such a good step towards healing, because talking about stuff actually can help.

6. Fear of failure/low self-worth

Here you have to look past the surface. Because sure, Klaus says Dave was the only person he loved more than himself, but other scenes say otherwise.

He does not believe it at first that Viktor is capable of destroying the earth, he argues that he’s their brother and they shouldn't just lock him away, they’re family. They can just ask him! When in S2 Viktor leaves for Sissy, he is the first to join him. He goes after Diego when Diego almost gets killed by Hazel and Cha-Cha, despite Diego having told him to stay in the car.

He is extremely sympathetic towards Luther when he finds out that Reginald didn't care, even though the rest figured that out so long ago. He tries to stop Luther from taking drugs, he goes after him even after Luther hurts him, doesn't even hesitate. He seems really affectionate with Allison, giving her hugs, letting her play with his hair, coming to her in S2 when he feels lost.

He tries to comfort Five in his own way when trying to find out who the owner of the glass eye is didn't work. He feels obvious guilt because he thinks he’s the reason why Ben can't move on.

So yeah, I’m calling bullshit on that “only person he loved more than himself.”

Then there's his “Yeah, me neither” line in response to God saying “I don't really like you all that much.”

Ben is the one who gives him support and says that he can do better, that he is better than what he thinks. (And that Dave knew it too). Because Klaus can't tell this to himself, another point in his low opinion of himself.

He calls his own powers “pretty much useless” and is very surprised to hear when Reginald told him he never reached his full potential. What potential? He can do more?

When he is appointed look-out for the Apocalypse Concert/The S1 Finale, he looks disappointed, like he isn't doing enough. He was always the look out when they were kids. And he clearly wants to do more, that's why he tried to make Ben corporeal at the bowling alley, to prove that he can.

He has struggles with becoming and staying clean. He is constantly judged for it, yet doesn't receive any support in return from his living siblings so his answer? More drugs.

After Vietnam, he almost relapses and the reason he gives is that sobriety didn't improve anything, everything’s still the same, still nobody takes him seriously. If everyone sees you as a failure? Why bother being anything else? And after a long enough time, it is hard not to internalize that.

His fear of failure is tightly knit to his fear of rejection.

Even when he finds out about making ghosts corporeal, he doesn't train his powers, doesn't try to do more, doesn't try to advance despite having the knowledge that his powers could allow more.

It’s the classic “Can't fail if you don't try”.

And it’s really stemming from being Reginald’s “greatest disappointment”. Because that is absolutely not the first time he told Klaus this.

With kids, if your expectations are too high and they can't meet them, often you need to lower the bar, instead of raising it.

Reginald kept throwing him into a mausoleum, expecting a certain result, then got angry when he got the exact opposite and just continued the punishment, because it IS a punishment by this point. It’s like “you’ll study three hours a day now and don't you dare fail that next test again”.

Origins: So, where does this avoidant personality come from? In Klaus’s case I’d assume it comes from emotional neglect. From being let down and not having his needs met. By a father leaving him alone in the dark with the ghosts instead of showing him love.

He wants to be loved, he wants to be trusted, but his early life experiences have given him the opposite.

[princessofgotham777]

Dating Jason Todd (Part Fourteen: Red Hood)

Fic type: angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, (ongoing) I don’t write smut

If you liked the Titans show but wish they handled Jason’s story line differently you might like this fic!

I’m gonna be taking inspo from under the red hood, titans, Arkham knight, comic lore, the Batman, arrowverse and my imagination lol. Of course I don’t own any dc characters this is purely fanfic. Reader is referred to as she/her.

Heyyyy, inspiration just struck me for some reason today. Also so like yk how tik tok got banned for like three hours, well I deleted it and now can’t get it back (don’t worry I saved my favorited edits to pinterest lol). But anyway I’m pissed cause like they took away freedom of speech but also on the other hand I was planning on deleting it away and so now that it’s gone my screen time has been down so much and like I’m off my phone and not doomscrolling anymore and that’s been actually amazing. So yeah long story short mad about the reasoning behind its deletion but happy that I’m not doomscrolling anymore and have a lot of energy back. Anyways I got some more ideas for the red hood plot. I’m probably gonna post a couple more parts to this section of the dating Jason Todd fic but then I’m gonna do another series that is a backstory for this one (so that one’s gonna be reader meeting dick and Jason and becoming a titan).

Warnings: death, talking about death, suicide and depression, injuries, violence, weapons, hallucinations, talking of religion, mentions of stalking in other parts, reader is depressed

Part Fourteen: Red Hood

The drive is silent, you fell asleep halfway through and when you open your eyes again, you’re outside the Queen mansion.

“Please please don’t run off again,” Dick says quietly. Even though he’s quiet you can still hear the undertone of anger in his voice.

“I didn’t ask you to go after me,” you snap.

“Listen,” he says turning his head. “I know you think no one’s gonna give you any crap because Jason died,” he sounds so harsh it shocks you. “And I know you and I made up but i won’t let you keep being an asshole to everyone including me in hopes of pushing us away.” “Just because he died doesn’t give you the right to pretend like he’s the only thing, the only person in your life that mattered cause he wasn’t.” You just stare at him with sadness and frustration. You knew he was right and truthfully a couple weeks ago in Chicago you were genuinely happy you and Dick made up, but now he was pissing you off and you were going to make that obvious.

“Thanks for the ride,” you say sarcastically as you grab your bag from the backseat. You get out of the car and see him about to as well. “Dont worry you can watch me go inside to make sure I don’t run off.” You walk to the door and knock. Quickly Thea opens the door, Dick must’ve texted her. Before stepping inside you yell to Dick, “have a nice ride back to San Francisco fuckface.”

“What was that about?” Thea asks.

“Don’t worry about it, he’s just pissing me off,” you say. “I’m sorry I ran off and scared you.”

“You scared everyone,” she says.

“Doesn’t mean I’m going to apologize to everyone,” you say.

“You will…eventually,” she says calmly. “But until then the professional on grief, myself, is here to put up with your mood swings and reckless behavior,” she announces falsely enthusiastically.

“I missed you…I missed being here,” you say.

“Course you missed me in the bestest friend ever,” she says playfully pulling you into a hug. “It’ll get better eventually,” she says in a more serious tone.

A week later and things had in fact not gotten better. Sure you stopped being reckless and snappy but it became the exact opposite. You were unusually quiet, only speaking when someone talked to you first. You spoke softly and slowly, normally you talk a million words per minute. Thea was freaked out by this behavior but you assured her you were fine, just grieving. What she didn’t know was when you were alone, assumed to be reading or doing whatever, you just stared off into space. No music, no TV, just nothingness. Dick hadn’t called you directly. Thea told you he’d been texting her asking how you were to which Thea pointed out how fucking weird the dynamic of your and his friendship is. Rachel called you a couple of times, you answered even though you didn’t want to talk with anyone. Your family back in central city didn’t suspect anything. You didn’t want to worry them or have your mother demand you come home so you acted normal. They knew you dated Jason so they asked how things were going and you simply responded things were fine. He’d never met them, you’d actually been trying to find a weekend to roadtrip to central so he could finally met them, then he died.

You figured Dick and the titans would be going back to the tower but apparently there was some new freak in a mask running around Gotham. So much has changed, but Gotham remains the same old crazy city. The guys calling himself “Red Hood”, or something like that. Apparently he’s killed a bunch of dealers who sell to kids, honestly you couldn’t really argue with that and you knew Jason would see nothing wrong. But since he’s killing, Dick and everyone else have decided he’s their new problem since Joker has been unusually quiet. You don’t even cry anymore and you’re sick of it. You’re sick of acting normal to your parents, of Thea being perfect and understanding, of being angry at Dick, of Dick pissing you off, of being weird to Rachel, of doing nothing. As night approaches you get an idea, a bizarre disturbing self-sabotaging idea. That night once Thea was asleep in the other room, you closed the door to the guest room and turned off the lights. You’re terrified of the dark, yet you turned out the lights; desperate to feel something. Even if that feeling is fear. You sit in the middle of the bed waiting. Waiting for the vines, the terror, the panic that always accompanied the darkness you avoided religiously. The vines never came. Oddly you still felt numb. You weren’t scared, you were sad. Sad that this is what your life had come to. And sad you’d gotten so low you attempted to scare yourself. Suddenly something moved in the darkness. The vines, you thought. It’s always the vines. This time as different though. It was as if the room went cold, a shiver ran up your spine. Suddenly something human shaped moved toward you with a stumble. Your eyes grew wide as you were faced with a hallucination of Jason’s corpse. Quickly you moved away from it and sweared for the light switch. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You say frustrated unable to find the light. Suddenly someone else flicks on the light and the image of Jason’s corpse disappears. You turn toward the light switch expecting to see Thea, instead you’re faced with a man in a red mask; redhood. “Shit,” you say knowing he’s not another hallucination and very much real. You dash towards the gun in the nightstand and hold it up towards him.

“Why would you turn the light off,” you look at him with confusion. “You’re scared of the dark,” he says as if he knows you.

“What the fuck do you want,” you say still pointing the gun at him.

“I’m not gonna hurt you,” he says as he takes a step closer. Without hesitation you shoot him in the arm.

“Leave!” You shout. You hold the gun toward him as he walks to the window he broke in.

“I-“ he starts to say.

“I said leave!” You shout as you fire the gun at his head. He’s quick enough jumping out the window so you miss. Seconds later Thea comes running in, holding a gun of her own. Seeing the intruder is gone she lowers her weapon.

“Thought you’d have a bow and arrow,” you say sarcastically.

“I would’ve thought the same of you,” she says playing into your joke.

“What can I say…I was in a rush,” you joke. “Fucking hell this means I have to talk to Dick,” you add.

“Unfortunately yes. Even more unfortunately I have to leave. Oliver’s dealing with Ra’s al Ghul for the millionth time. I guess someone used the Lazarus pit without permission and Ra’s thinks it was Oli,” she says.

“If Jason wasn’t so stubborn and against resurrection I’d have thrown him in,” you say half joking.

“You can still stay here of course, but I have to leave,” she says.

“Course I understand,” you assure her. “Unfortunately I should go to Gotham,” you say. “I have to figure out what this redhood asshole wants.”

Heyyy, I hope you liked reading this part. If you enjoyed it please like, reblog, and or follow. Any positive feedback is much appreciated it inspires me to keep writing and posting parts. If you enjoyed and want to read the other parts please check out my Masterlist, there’s also dick Grayson x reader and Anakin Skywalker x reader fics on there. Thanks for reading🩷

Masterlist

[lightdancingwords]

Crossroads of the Heart - Part One of ?

Pairings: CJ Braxton x Y/N Female reader Series Summary: Y/N is a psychology major assigned to shadow CJ at The Stand, unaware he's the one who basically saved her life four years before. CJ is unaware that she's the one who left a notable impact on him over the phone four years ago. As they navigate the work at The Stand, they develop a spark that demands revelation and connection.

Word Count: 3,145

Tags/Warnings: Angst (so much angst), depression, mentions self-unaliving (sorry!), passing of parent

A/N: Comments, Likes, Reblogs, Kind feedback are always highly appreciated. Please let me know if you want to be added to the tag list! Evidently my muse won't shut up, so here we go! A new story in a new setting! I hope you all enjoy!

Note: The poem is obviously from Taylor Swift's "Snow On The Beach"! I do not claim it, only used it for the sake of the story! In fact, it inspired a bit of this series!

Dividers: credit to @saradika-graphics

Chapter One: Four Years Ago

“The Stand, teen helpline, how can I help you tonight?” CJ said automatically as soon as he picked up the phone ringing by his desk.

Y/N hesitated. Did she actually dare to speak? Did she dare to try and get help? The silence stretched out, and she wasn’t sure how to begin.

“I—I’m sorry, this was a mistake,” she finally said.

“It's okay,” CJ said. “Let’s take a breath. Why did you call?” The soft tone was comforting.

Y/N closed her eyes tight, trying to articulate her messed up feelings. She sniffed and wiped away a tear. “Um… l-last year, my mom died. And today was…” She couldn’t even say it.

“The anniversary?” CJ said gently, having a suspicion of what she was driving at.

“Yeah,” she whispered into the phone. “It’s also my birthday.” The tears began to spill unhindered. “Yay… happy birthday, right?”

“Birthdays can be tough,” CJ said empathetically. “Especially if it reminds you of a loss. Do you have any plans for the day, maybe distract yourself?”

“N-not really,” she admitted.

“It’s okay. Sometimes the best distraction is just talking to someone. You’re not alone—you’ve got me,” CJ said, giving a small smile, even though he knew she couldn’t see it.

“No offense, but you’re paid to do this,” she replied. “Doesn’t quite make it altruistic of you.”

“True, I am paid to listen,” CJ said, “But it still doesn't mean I’m just going to be going through the motions. And I’m sure I’m not the only one at The Stand who actually cares about a little more than a paycheck.”

Y/N winced. He was trying to be nice and she just kept wrecking it. She sniffed again and whispered, “Sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” CJ said, still talking in a soft and soothing tone. “I won’t try to guilt you for feeling the things you do, and I’m not going to expect you to be over your mother’s death immediately.”

“You’d be the first then,” she said bitterly. “My father already remarried.”

CJ could tell she’s holding back some bitter feelings. “I'm assuming he did it quite quickly?” CJ sighed.

“Yeah, pretty much.” She sniffed, wished she could stop crying. “Tried to get me to come to the wedding and I didn’t want to. Instead of talking to me, he… he threatened my college fund. Because god forbid Henry L/N actually bother to talk to his daughter. Or grieve with her. Or even just… or even wish me a happy birthday.”

CJ couldn’t help but to feel a little bit of anger towards her father for how he behaved towards her. “Sounds like he's a real piece of work,” CJ said. “No wonder he had to go and remarry immediately. He probably can't deal with being alone.”

That actually got a chuckle out of her. “God, no. He’s absolutely helpless when it takes to taking care of anything.”

“Let me guess,” CJ said, giving a small chuckle as well. “Your mom did all the housework, cooking, grocery shopping, and general upkeep.”

“She even fixed the cars,” she said, and there was a tinge of awe and respect for her late mother.

“It sounds like your mom was quite the woman,” CJ said, “I’m sorry for your loss, and the... unfortunate change in your relationship with your father. That can make things complicated.”

“It… it wouldn’t be so bad if my father just pretended to care. He doesn’t even do that.” She let out a long sigh. “He wants me to study business so I can excel and all that crap.”

“Sounds like he’s just planning his next inheritance,” CJ said, “What about you? What do you want to study?”

Rachel was silent for a moment. “Um. This is going to sound dumb.” She cleared her throat. “I want to be a writer.”

“A writer? I think that sounds great!" CJ said quickly, giving an encouraging little laugh. “Don’t let your dad convince you to do something that's just going to make him look good. You should be able to decide what path is best for you, not just something that makes your parent proud of you.”

“I don’t even know I’m any good,” she said, protesting weakly.

“Well the only way to find out is to try,” CJ said with a soft smile, “Are you currently trying to pursue writing? Or is your dad pressuring you not to?”

She hesitated again. “I…” She bit her lip. “You know the college newspaper? The Explorer?”

“Yeah?” CJ said, recognizing the name of the student-run local newspaper. “What about it?”

“They’re having a contest.” She picked at a piece of lint on her blanket. “I… didn’t tell my father but I sent in a submission for a poem. I find out tomorrow if I win.”

“Well,” CJ said with a soft smile, not wanting to get her hopes up just in case. “I hope you win. It sounds like he’s not been very supportive of your writing—did he just tell you not to pursue it at all?”

“Basically, he said I should live with my feet on the ground and not in the clouds,” she said with a scoff.

“Well, I think he’s wrong,” CJ said quickly. “You should be able to chase your dreams, and if he doesn’t support you, I’m sure there’s tons of other people out there who would love to take his place. I bet you’re a wonderful writer, and I wouldn’t be shocked if you win.”

“You don’t even know what I wrote,” she argued half-heatedly. “How could you be so sure of that?”

“Well, I just have a hunch,” CJ said. “You’re articulate, and I’m sure your poem is full of emotion. Do you mind telling me what your poem is about?”

“It’s about what seems to be impossible, like snow on the beach. Seeing something so special and rare and incredible,” she said timidly, feeling a bit embarrassed to tell him about it.

CJ was intrigued by this, and he could appreciate the poetic quality. “That sounds like an amazing subject,” he encouraged. “When did you write this poem? I’m sure you’ve worked hard on it.”

“It was something I worked on for the last few months,” she admitted. “I kept trying it over and over. I sent in the final draft just hours shy of the deadline. I just wanted it to be perfect.”

“Well, I think your hard work shows,” CJ said. “I just have this gut feeling that it’ll be good enough—and even if it’s not, you can always just keep improving. You know what they say: Rome wasn’t built in a day.”

She chuckled. “I could easily counter that supposedly God built the world in six days. But I get your point.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not sure about how long it took for the world to be built,” CJ said, amused at her remark. “But what I meant was, you can’t create something amazing instantly—you have to just keep working on it. And from the way you’ve described this poem, it seems like you’ve put your heart and soul into making it.”

“I did,” she said softly. “My mom was the dreamer. She was an amazing artist. Actually duplicated the look of the stag from Bambi. And she did it from memory.”

“That sounds like quite the talent,” CJ said, impressed. “Did you ever take after her? Do you do any art?”

“I can do Hangman stick people really well,” she said by way of answer.

CJ gave a little chuckle in response to her answer. “So what are your plans for tomorrow?” CJ asked. “I assume you’ll be checking to see if you won the contest?”

“Definitely that,” she said. “They announce the winners in the morning edition so I may just be up with the birds at why-six-o-clock and run to the nearest newsstand.”

CJ chuckled at her description. “Just hearing you say that makes me think even more that you’re going to do really well. What are you going to do if you do win?”

“Um, you mean besides faint?” she asked.

CJ gave a small laugh. “That’s one way to react, I guess,” he said. “If you were to win, would you consider continuing to pursue writing and submitting other works for contests in the future?”

Evidently that never occurred to her. “I… I don’t know. I didn’t even think that far.”

CJ gave a soft smile. “Well, I think it’d be great if you did,’ he said. “Whether it’s writing poetry, essays, short stories—whatever takes your fancy, I think you should consider submitting for more contests. I bet you’d do really well.”

She smiled faintly. “Maybe.” She paused, then said, “I guess I just didn’t think beyond just making it past today.”

CJ seemed to take notice of the hint of sadness in her voice. “Yeah,” he said softly. “I know being stuck in the present is something a lot of people go through—it’s easy to fall into the mindset of just surviving every day.”

“It’s… it’s been really hard.” Did she dare tell him? Should she? It would change everything for her, even as far as her whole life.

CJ could tell that there’s more going on here, but given that it was her decision, he was not going to force her to tell him anything just yet. “Can I ask you a quick question?”

“Um. Sure.”

“Does anyone else know about this poem you sent it?” CJ asked.

“No… just you,” she admitted.

“Can I make a request?” he said.

Rachel blinked. “Sure… I guess.”

“Since it seems like you care a lot about this poem…” he started to say. “Would you mind reading it to me?”

That surprised her. “You want to hear the poem?”

“If that’s okay with you,” CJ said. “I’d love to hear the poem you've been working on.”

After a long moment of astonishment, some rustling of papers could be heard. Then she took deep breath.

“One night, a few moons ago I saw flecks of what could’ve been lights But it might have been you Passing by unbeknownst to me Life is emotionally abusive And time can’t stop me quite like you did And it’s like snow at the beach Weird but fuckin’ beautiful Flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful You wanting me tonight feels impossible But it’s coming down, no sound, it’s all around I searched the aurora borealis green I’ve never seen someone lit from within Burning out my periphery It’s fine to take it until you make it Til you do, til it’s true”

CJ was completely immersed in the poem. It’s not his usual fare—usually the poems he heard from the helpline were full of hopeless feelings and misery, nothing like the more optimistic tone of this one. It’s almost like it was meant to be read out loud—it had the perfect rhythm and flow.

“Wow…” he finally said, his soft smile growing wider. “That was incredible.”

Rachel found herself blushing, glad he can’t see her through the phone. “Thank you,” she said shyly.

“Honestly,” CJ said earnestly. “If you do win, I hope you stick with writing poetry. It makes me happy that there are still some people out there who want to try and see the world through a brighter perspective.” He paused. “Is it really okay if I ask another question?”

“I’ll think about it,” she said in regards to the first part, about continuing poetry. “And um, sure, ask.”

“Are you open to my honest opinion on the poem?”

She hesitated, then went for it. “Yes.”

“Well...” CJ took a deep breath, hesitating on how he should phrase what he wanted to say. “I know you said you were trying to get it right, but I just wanted to let you know—I think that it’s perfect already. It doesn’t need to be edited or made better—it’s already flawless.”

Her breath caught in her throat. “I… wow. That… that was really nice of you.”

“It's honest,” he said. “And I just think that you should know that.”

She smiled shakily, then glanced down at her lap. “Can… can I tell you something?”

CJ’s smile widens, giving an encouraging nod. “Of course, I’m all ears.”

She cleared her throat, deciding to be fully honest. “I… I didn’t know what was going to happen w-when I called The Stand. I was… just in a bad spot and scaring myself.”

CJ didn’t let on the fact that he could’ve guessed that, considering the state she was in when she first started talking to him. “Well, I’m glad you called—even if you didn’t know it was going to help you. But are you still in that bad spot? You said you were frightening yourself—what do you mean by that?”

There was a long, quiet pause. “I… I was thinking of… of ending it.”

CJ can’t help but feel concerned and a little shocked when he heard that. “You were considering...” He trails off, not being able to say it.

She sniffed and let out a shaky breath. “Yeah…. I even… I even got a bottle of… something.”

His body tensed a bit when she said that. “Can I be honest with you?”

“…yeah,” she answered softly. Hesitant as to what he would say.

He took deep breath. “That really terrifies me. I don’t want that to be a path that you go down, because that’s the path where the light gets shut off forever—and it sounds like you have so much light left to show the world. What made you think about ending it?”

The tears came at once, flooding her vision. “I was just…” Her voice shook, thick with emotion. “I was just so tired of hurting. I’m all alone here at the college and… it just feels dark.”

CJ was heartbroken to heard her like this. He knew that there were probably many more students like this out there—lost, sad, and alone. He’s experienced plenty of dark days himself, though never quite to this point.

“I know the feeling," he said solemnly. “I know the feeling when it feels like it’s just going to hurt forever, and when it seems like the walls are closing in around you.”

“That’s why I called,” she whispered over the phone. “It felt like I was drowning.”

“Well, I’m glad you called,” CJ said quickly. “Because if you didn’t, you might have actually gone through with...”

He trails off, not wanting to say the words out loud like she did, not wanting to put the idea in her mind.

“The thing is—I know you’re in a really dark spot right now,” he continued softly. “But it really seems like you have the potential to do incredible things if you hang in there. You’ve got to give yourself another chance, just like this poem.”

“I don’t know if I can do that,” she admitted shakily. “It just feels really lonely and dark. I don’t have friends here. Hell, even the guy I’m crushing on doesn’t even know I’m alive.”

“Yeah, it does sound like you’re in a pretty bad spot,” CJ admitted, sympathizing with her about the lack of friends. “And you’re saying you have a crush on a guy but he doesn’t even know who you are?”

“Yeah.” She wiped at the tears on her cheeks. “He’s in my English 203 class.”

“And what’s so special about him that makes you have a crush on him?” CJ asked, trying to understand.

“He’s… he’s got this smile that seriously lights up a room,” she said hesitatingly. If she knew she was talking to the very guy she was crushing on, Y/N would’ve fainted. Or screamed and hung up.

“And he’s in your English class? He must be pretty smart then, right?”

“I think so anyway,” she said. “He’s got this self-deprecation thing going on, as though he feels he isn’t.”

CJ laughed at this—it sounded a lot like his own way of coping. “I get it,” he said with a sympathetic laugh, though he didn’t reveal that that’s how he saw himself as well.

“And he’s got a nice smile as well, and he’s smart?” he continued, trying to imagine who could fit this description so perfectly.

“Yeah… and really nice. He’s usually the first to jump up and help if the professor asks for it,” she said. “I like that. He’s not even doing it to butter her up either.”

“And he’s kind? It sounds almost like you’re not even talking about a college student, but some angelic being,” he teased, his curiosity growing as they discuss this unknown man. “Like something out of a fairy tale.

“Well, it’s pretty obvious why you have a crush on this guy—he sounds like the full package,” he said.

“Yeah,” she said with a despondent sigh.

“Listen,” CJ said gently, “maybe he doesn’t know you like him. He could be crushing on you too and you both aren’t aware of it.”

She let out a soft laugh. “You mean like a rom-com?”

“Yeah! You never know.” He smiled a bit. “You’ve got a lot going on for you… don’t give up, please.”

Y/N took a shaky breath, sniffled, and wiped her eyes. “Thank you,” she said shakily, her voice thick with emotion.

“For what?” CJ asked, his voice low and soft. “For listening. I know it won’t fix everything, but… it helped me,” Y/N whispered. “Thank you.”

CJ felt his heart clench. She sounded like a sweet girl who was just in a bad spot. If it hadn’t been against the rules, he would reach out to her outside of the helpline, be a friend, hell, maybe even date her because she sounded so incredible.

“You’re very welcome,” he whispered. “If you ever need to talk to someone… we’re here. I’m here.”

Y/N smiled tremulously. “I’ll remember that.” She took another breath. “Thank you, again…. G-goodbye.”

“Goodbye,” he whispered.

The line went quiet. CJ hated himself so much in that moment. He didn’t get her name. He didn’t know who the guy in English 203 she was talking about, her crush. He… didn’t even get her phone number.

The next morning, he went out and grabbed a copy of The Explorer to see if the girl won. He saw her poem, Snow On The Beach, as the winner. But no name. They only put her initials. He cut it out, framed it no less, and kept it by his desk at The Stand.

Absurdly, for the next four years, he would obsessively answer every call, wondering if it was her. He never forgot her.

And when Y/N came into The Stand for her practicum, he didn’t know it was her—and she didn’t know it was him.

To be continued….

Tag List:

Please let me know if you want to be added to the tag list for this series! Or you can use my tag list!

[ratsoh-writes]

(Based off a folktale, the guy in the story just didn’t question it and went along with it despite the creepiness of it all) Skele boys from the Mafia Aus have a close friend who they hang out with very often yet said friend just disappeared one day and hasn’t talked to them for the past 6-7 months. They suddenly recieve a hastily written from said friend saying something along the lines of “My spouse died recently and some random person just showed up in my a house, a complete stranger, and started doing the cooking and cleaning and looking after my kids. I don’t know them, and I can’t get them to leave. Please help me”. How do they react?

Snipe: bold of you to think you can hide from snipe. The second friend goes silent, he automatically assumes they’ve either been kidnapped or murdered, so he starts the hunt for a body. Of course he finds out they’ve just lost their spouse, a terrible thing really, and is probably grieving. Snipe won’t impose, but he does send “I’m there if you need me” texts and calls every now and then. When friend contacts him about the “imposter” he almost doesn’t believe it. He’ll cautiously go visit to investigate, with butch or boss as backup of course

Bruiser: bold of you to think you can ghost bruiser. He broke into friends house after the first week of silence and easily learned what happened. Friend can’t get rid of bruiser at this point. Bruiser is checking in every couple of days, sometimes taking the kids out for fun so friend can get a break, and stealing friend of course every now and then. He’s not letting his bestie loose themself in their grief. When the imposter shows up the first time, there’s a solid chance bruiser was over as well. They of course duke it out right there.

Butch: bold of you to think butch wont just let a friend disappear. After about a month of no contact, butch basically barges in to angrily confront friend, and immediately all the wind is taken out of his sails when he hears about their loss. After that he’s a supportive buddy in his gruff way, forcing his friend to go out with him so they don’t just rot at home. When friend calls him about the imposter, butch storms over, brass knuckles ready, and boss as backup. The faker isn’t getting out alive on his watch~

Boss: bold of you to think he won’t know. Boss low-key keeps tabs on his closest friends, especially if they’re normal folk. He has good reason to given how his dangerous lifestyle seems to bleed out on others. So boss is likely one of the first to know his friends spouse died, even if they didn’t tell him in person. He of course is the best bestie one can have. He cooks for friend, helps with the kids when his schedule allows, and anything else he can think of while they grieve. And of course he’s storming over immediately when they call for help. Honestly his reaction would be the same for almost any situation. Boss is protective

Ace: bold of you to think lol. Ace knew spouse died mere hours after friend found out. He already stabbed the poor sucker who crashed their car into them. He also stabbed the healthcare agent that delayed spouses insurance. When friend calls him, he rushes over with the exact same knife, ready for his next hit heroic act

Slim: he’s the least invasive of the mafia brothers. So friend lasts a solid 2 or so months of silence before slim contacts them. Probably because a brother decided to randomly do some snooping and told slim the tea. Slim is crap at comforting people, but he does at least talk to friend, just to let them know he’s there for them. When they call him panicked about the imposter, he sends over snipe and butch to scope things out.

[lcvesjj]

I'm sorry I couldn't stay… bau x fem!reader

Prompt : “I’m sorry I couldn’t stay” / “Wasn’t your fault… I made my decision”

Paring : platonic!bau x Reader, JJ x reader, father figure!Hotch x Reader

Warnings : major character death, angst, general criminal minds stuff, mentions of death and grieving, a lot of sadness, reader dies, no happy endings (if there is anything else I should add please just let me know and I’ll add it!)

Summary : an ‘easy’ arrest goes horribly wrong. (Please read warnings before reading.)

“Y/n are you ready? Hotch is already waiting for us by the SUV’s.” JJ asked while looking at you. 

“Yea, I think I’m ready.” You replied while nervously looking at the blonde.

You were new to the team, only having spent around 2 months with them. But you already loved them all so much, they were all like family to you - a little dysfunctional but still a family. 

This was also your first time being in the field since being shot, luckily it was only a graze on your shoulder that had left a small scar. Hotch didn’t allow you to join them into the field, since he left like you needed more rest. You were allowed to travel with the team, but every single time that there was a raid you were left with Reid and sometimes Derek or JJ back at the station.  

It was supposed to be a really simple arrest. Go in, get the unsub and bring him back to the police station. But it all went so horribly wrong. 

As soon as Hotch put the car in park, everyone carefully got out and took out their weapons and flashlights. Quietly walking towards the old house where the unsub was supposed to be. You were standing behind JJ and Derek, suddenly the wind picked up. Goosebumps started to appear on your skin, something was off you could feel it in your bones. The chilling sensation flowing deep down to your bones. 

That’s when you realised - It was a trap. Before you could even shout to alert your teammates, it was already too late. Bullets started flying everywhere, the team obviously started firing back at the unsub. This didn’t make any sense. Why were there so many bullets flying? 

The team profiled that there was only one unsub. 

“So if there are so many bullets flying, that must mean that there are at least two or more unsubs.” You thought to yourself.

You saw a bullet heading for JJ so before you could even think twice you quickly jumped to push her away. 

The next thing you knew, you were laying on the grass. With a hot white pain numbing your senses and the only thing you could hear was the constant ringing in your ears. You were shot in the stomach twice. Tears started blurring your vision, you felt so much pain it was really hard to deal with. 

Derek was instantly by your side and seeing you in so much pain broke him. You were like a little sister to him since you were even younger than Reid he felt like he had to protect you and take care of you. Even though you were an adult he still felt responsible to keep you safe. 

The bullets stopped flying and everything went quiet. They had been able to sneak in and arrest the unsub. Hotch looked over to see if everyone was alright. Seeing you down on the grass and seeing Derek’s distraught expression he immediately rushed to your side and started helping Derek press down on your stomach to stop the blood from gushing everywhere. The rest of the team stood frozen while Derek started shouting that a medic is needed. JJ klent down next to you head and quickly took off her FBI jacket to put it under your head gently. She kept on saying that you'll be fine, and that the paramedics were coming. 

Reid broke down seeing the state you were in. Everyone was just hoping that the medics would get there on time. They couldn't let you die, not like this. You still had many years in front of you, you were so young. 

“Wasn’t your fault… I made my decision.” You slowly said while coughing up blood. The words were mostly aimed at Hotch. In the small time you got to know him he became something similar to a parental figure. 

“You’ll be okay kiddo, you just need to hang on okay?” Rossi gently said, trying his best to keep you awake and alive. 

“Where is that ambulance?! We need a medic now!” Hotch yelled. “Don’t you dare close your eyes Y/n.” He pleaded while quietly crying. The whole team was gathered over your nearly passed out b0dy. 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t stay…Tell JJ I love her please.” You said while crying and coughing up more blood, you knew you wouldn’t make it. And that was one of the most terrifying things ever. The feeling of slowly dying was so scary, you were so young. You didn’t want to die - not like like this.

You were starting to lose your vision and senses, all you could now hear were the sobs of your teammates fading away in the distance. The pain started to disappear. All you could see was this white light and you felt so calm, with a small breath you were gone. 

You were dead.

You were long gone before you could hear Hotch constantly repeating that it was all going to be alright and JJ’s soft voice saying that it was okay and that it was alright, and that she loved you too and would never forget you. It hurt her to say that, but she knew that this was the end for you. There was nothing she could do to help you.

And as much as it hurt, she knew you weren’t going to make it. The only thing that comforted her was the fact that you were no longer in pain. And as much as she already missed you, JJ knew you were at peace. Nothing more could hurt you and you were finally safe. 

A few days later was your funeral. Everybody was dressed in black and gathered at the church to say a final goodbye. JJ was wearing dark sunglasses to cover her puffy and teary eyes. Knowing that you died to protect her made her feel so guilty. If only she was more careful… 

You died as a hero and they were all thankful that they had the chance to meet someone as amazing and kind as you. And to this day they still talk about you and their memories with you.

[elliespassagerprincess]

Idk if ur taking requests anymore, but I rly love ur stories! Could you do an Ellie x reader story based on the song together by beabadoobee? THANK UUU!!

Together (ellie williams x reader)

hi anon! thank you sm for the request, and for the compliment, i started giggling... i hope you enjoy this pookie <3

This story is based off the song Together by Beabadoobee, if you can please listen to the song as you're reading:)

Pairing: ellie x fem!reader

Requests are always open feel free to leave one! You can send me a song and I'll take it from there!

Warnings: toxic relationships, death, suicide and self harm and a little blasphemy

Summary: Your relationship was toxic, you both knew this... but yet both of you couldn't stay away from each other

wc: 1.7k

(If you want to be added to my tag list, just leave a comment so i can tag you in future work!)

Crash the car again

The same mistakes again

Don't wanna hurt you like I did

Screaming, crying, dishonesty. These were some of the words you used to describe you and Ellie’s relationship. It was unhealthy. It was toxic. Religious people would always quote that one bible verse where it says a dog would vomit and then it would go back to eat its vomit. The same way sinners would go back to sin. The same way you would go back to Ellie.

You and Ellie’s relationship hadn’t always been toxic, there were happy times too. The times she would come over and the two of you would watch a movie together, that one time Ellie snuck you out of Jackson to show you a dinosaur museum. You were happy. Very happy.

Until Joel died.

When Joel died Ellie changed. She became cold, distant.

 But you understood why. She was grieving.

And you truly did assume that eventually she’ll go back to normal. But then her obsession with finding Abby started. She left Jackson. You were broken.

Life without Ellie felt like a life without sunlight. There was no light. No joy. It was cold. You remembered the countless nights of you crying yourself to sleep. The nights you would reach over and touch the side of the bed Ellie lay on. It was always cold. The cold side of the bed was a painful reminder that she chose revenge over you.

But Ellie came back to Jackson.

You were happier than ever.  Because you waited for Ellie. You put your life on hold for her, because you couldn’t imagine a life without her.

Ellie changed. She became more aggressive. One second she would be ok the next moment she’d explode with anger. Hurtful words leaving her mouth. And that was when you decided to breakup with her, for the first time.

The breakup lasted 2 weeks. And you went back to her again. The arguments and lies got worse, and you left. For a second time. But not long after you came back. You would always come back.

That’s probably why you were standing outside Ellie’s house. The two of you had an argument 3 weeks ago. Ellie had lied to you about where she slept the previous night saying “don’t worry baby I’m going to Maria and Tommy” but you soon found out she went to her ex-girlfriend’s house.

She lied. You were hurt. You felt Betrayed. And you broke up with her again.

But you came back. You had to talk to Ellie.

But for the first time ever, you weren’t here to take Ellie back, you weren’t here to listen to her bullshit promises, you were here to say goodbye. You were her to end it all, so that you could be free from Ellie’s harsh words. You were doing this for yourself. And for the sake of your mental health.

You shakily reached for the door, your left had curling into a fist, you felt the wood on your knuckles as you lightly knocked.

The door flew open, revealing Ellie in all her glory. Her autumn brown hair is longer, reaching past her shoulders, dark circles covered the bottom of her beautiful eyes.

“Baby?” she asked softly eyes wide.

'Cause I'm not waiting for you

But I don't want to hurt you

Ellie knew Joel’s death affected her in more ways than one. She knew her mental health suffered because of his death. Out of everyone she hurt and killed the last person she wanted to cause any harm to was you. But it was as if she couldn’t stop herself from hurting you.

She couldn’t kill Abby because she knew it wouldn’t bring Joel back. She was filled with anger. Pain. Hatred and she didn’t know how to get it out. And there you were. Her soft and sweet girl, that waited for her.

In a way Ellie was jealous of you. How innocent you were. All the people she killed, everything she did to try and get Joel some justice, just made her dirty. And there you were. Ellie sometimes wondered why you wouldn’t just leave her. All she did was hurt you.

She wanted to make you feel what she felt all these months as she went after Abby. But yet you stayed. And that’s why she was so surprised to see you standing in front of her house with a small smile on your face.

“Hi els” you spoke softly; your eyes briefly fell to the floor as if you were preparing to tell her something. Something big. Something Important.

 After a few seconds your eyes met again, and you spoke once more; “we need to talk”

All alone again

It hurts my heart again

I think my blood is running thin

I'm away again

It hurts my head again

Don't wanna be away from your skin

As toxic as your relationship was, you both couldn’t stay away from each other. The countless times you and Ellie broke up, the two of you would sneak out to meet each other. Just to be in each other’s presence.

 Neither you or Ellie would never admit it: but you can’t live without each other. The two of you had built such a bond that you were both so incredibly dependent on the other for comfort. All the nights Ellie cried when you left her, all the days Ellie would plead and beg you to come back because she would change and she would be a better person. She really tried. But she couldn’t. Her past was haunting her. It traumatized her. Broke her beyond repair. When she looks at you the only thing she could imagine was all the people she had to kill. But at the same time she felt comforted by your smile.

Ellie was planning on changing but she doesn’t know how.

 How does one go back to the way they were before they watched their father figure get brutally murdered?

But you had other plans. There isn’t going to be a next time. You weren’t going to let Ellie say another word that will put you into another depressive episode. You had to end it all.

You sat across her, and Ellie felt like her heart was being ripped into a million pieces. It felt like her heart was shattered, and you were watching her bleed pout.

She had been shot, stabbed, but the pain of the words you muttered, hurts even more.

“Earth to Ellie” you said because she went silent. She zoned out thinking of all the ways she could try to get back together with you.

 “No” Ellie spoke “you can’t do this”

“I can” you said softly the room fell silent, the tension rising.

 “Ellie” you spoke again “we can never be together again” you started “you hurt me too much” and Ellie felt shame wash over her.

“I’m sorry” she said with a pleading look in her eyes “I’ll change” and Ellie watched you shake your head.

“You never fucking changed, what makes me think you’ll do it now?” you spoke harshly.

You got up and started walking towards the door. Ellie felt the tears running down her cheeks. She watched your figure walk towards the door. You didn’t even look back at her.

 “Goodbye Ellie”

Hurt myself again

I thought you'd notice it

Don't wanna fix it like you did

Your body was found on a Saturday morning. You were hanging from the roof. You had hung yourself. You didn’t leave a note. No one knows why you killed yourself. Your secrets died with you, the reason and the problems you faced, went to the grave with you. And this puzzled Ellie.

Why didn’t you tell her?

 Yes, your relationship was bad, but you could’ve told her. She would’ve helped you. She would’ve hurt those who harmed you.

Two days after your body was found your words ran in Ellie’s mind.

You keep hurting me….

It was her. Ellie was the problem. Ellie was the reason you felt so depressed that you ended your life.

 It was all her fault

She felt bad, guilty. She murdered you. She had your blood on her hands. Ellie didn’t deserve to be alive. The day of your funeral she watched as your body was lowered into the ground, Ellie’s loud sobs echoing across all of Jackson. Ellie wished that was her. She wished she was the one being buried because you didn’t deserve that. Ellie start hurting herself. She’d watch her blood drip onto her bed as she cut herself. She wishes she could give some of her blood to you. She wishes she could give life back to you. Her blood in exchange for your life. The way Jesus died on the cross to give us eternal life the same way she wanted to die. For you. To give you the life you deserved.

I think I'm okay by myself, I'm doing great

But we'd be better together, better together

Together though, together though, together again

Ellie thought your death would be good for her. Maybe if you weren’t there she’d be ok. But your death made everything worse for Ellie. She thought she could live in a world without you. She realized she couldn’t and as Ellie took her final breath as she lay on her bed bleeding out, she hoped that she would be reunited with you in the afterlife, that the two of you would finally be together.

 They say death separates people. Death rips families and relationships apart. And that’s what Joel’s death did to you and Ellie’s relationship. His death ruined the only good thing both of you had left. But now that both you and Ellie have passed away, she hoped that her death might bring you back together. For your souls to be intertwined.

Ellie hoped that if God was real that he would take pity on her and forgive her sins. That He let the two of you be together in the afterlife. That death would bring you closer. And that you’d be together forever.

Authors note: Sorry for going MIA again, life has been kinda messy rn, but I promise I’ll try and get more stories out soon, to all the requests in my inbox, I swear I’ll write your stories soon. Remember you are loved and my requests are always open!!

Yours truly

Zia <3

[delicate-luv]

Two Become One ~ Chapter Four

Summary: you meet Steve and decide to spend the night and Eddie’s house once again…will your actions finally catch up to you?

CW: 18+, MDNI, vomiting, nausea, mention of pregnancy, mention of death, mention of parent death, distant parents, cancer, abusive parents

Masterlist

This one is a bit shorter but next chapter will be worth it! :)———————————————————————

You arrived at Steve's house and he answered the door shortly after Eddie knocked twice. All the lights were out. He had one other person there with him who was a few years younger and said his name was Dustin.

"Eddie! How you doing bud?"

"Doing great. This is my uh- this is y/n." Eddie gestured towards you

"Pleasure to meet you. I see Eddie looks happy, so that's good." He opened the door wider, giving you a warm smile. “This is my other friend, Dustin. He annoys the hell out of me sometimes."

You shook his hand. "Nice to meet you. Eddie's told me all about you Steve. Says you are the 'unofficial official babysitter'?"

"He would be correct. Everyone just dumps their kids on me but I don't mind."

You let out a yawn that you failed to hide, which got a reaction from Eddie. "She's tired, can I have Otis so we can go home and go to sleep?"

"Yes. He's out like a light, so hopefully you can get the little guy home before he wakes up."

"Will do."

Steve left the door open for a minute, before walking back with the 2 year old in his arms. He swiftly handed him over to Eddie, without waking him.

Eddie quickly put him in his car seat in the back of the truck.

"Thanks again Steve. I owe you one."

Steve crossed his arms and leaned against the doorframe. "Actually, you owe me a lot. Remember what happened a few weeks ago?"

"Yes, I do." He avoided any further discussion and turned to you in a sudden rush. "C'mon, let's get you home."

You all got into the truck and started towards Eddie's home.

You whispered. “what did Steve mean by a few weeks ago? What happened?"

Eddie rubbed his face and quietly groaned. "ughhh. That's when I was with you. I was supposed to pick Otis up from Steve's house after the gig. Instead, I got black out drunk and slept with you instead."

"I'm sorry." You slouched in the car seat.

"It's not your fault. You're not the one who got black out drunk and picked your son up at 10 a.m. when you we're supposed to pick him up at 1 a.m." He could tell you felt guilty about the entire situation, so he quickly changed the subject. "let's just worry about getting some sleep."

You eventually got back to Eddie's home. He snuck Otis into a room adjacent to his and tucked him into a small bed. He all did it without waking him. It was like magic.

Last time you were here, the door must have been shut-hence why you didn't see any evidence of a kid except for the sonogram picture.

As you laid down in his bed, Eddie noticed you were particularly quiet.

“What’re you thinking about?”

You sighed. “If I’m being honest, I miss my mom.” You finally admitted, a little bit shocked at yourself. “I never said that out loud before.”

He turned to you, fully ready to listen. His eyes shined with empathy for you.

“Ever since my dad died, she-” you stared into your lap. “She’s just been distant. I feel like I’m grieving not only one, but two parents right now. Who knows if she even had a funeral for my dad. God, he was such a good person, he really deserved the best memorial, too. She’s always been manipulative, projecting and isolating when she doesn’t want to face reality.”

He grabbed your hand and rubbed it lovingly. “I know how you’re feeling, and I’m so sorry. My mom died of cancer when I was 8. My dad was very abusive, but his abuse only became worse once she left us. Sometimes death just does that to a person. It’s sad, I know. But I just think about Otis and- and how he needs at least one of his parents to show up for him, even if he’s too young to even notice his mom is dead in the first place.”

“Eddie, I’m so sorry.” You shook your head in disbelief. “Let’s be each others rock from now on? You can trust me with anything.”

“Don’t apologize.” He whispered to you. “But I uh- I fell into drugs, my dad caught me with them, forced me to shave my head. I tried to run away. He was caught with the possession of my drugs, they found me with a shaved head and a black eye, and took him in for questioning. He’s been locked up ever since and I’ve been living with my uncle for the rest of my childhood. I’m happy he’s gone forever, but I did live with that guilt for a while. They were my drugs after all.”

“Don’t feel guilty. He got exactly what was coming to him. He was abusive, he needed to be taken away one way or another.” You took a deep breath, and Eddie helped you wiped your tears. “It sounds like we’ve both had pretty bad childhoods, yeah?”

“You’re right about that.” He brought you into a warm embrace. “It’ll be alright.”

This was a completely new side of him you were seeing tonight, and you were beginning to really like it.

The next morning, you woke with a pounding headache and awful nausea. Your hangover was terrible.

except for that fact that you had nothing to drink the night before.

You felt it all coming up, so you made a mad dash over to the bathroom, trying not to wake Eddie.

You started to throw up in the toilet. Eddie obviously heard, as he came running over. He tied your hair up and started rubbing the small of your back.

"You okay?" He sounded panicked.

"I don't know where this is coming from?!" You stammered. "I feel hungover. But I didn't drink anything last night."

A few moments went by in silence. Your heart was racing and your hands were shaky. You hated vomiting, so you usually didn’t do things that would provoke it on purpose. You were consumed by all the possibilities that could have happened. Eddie eyes went wide before he grabbed a towel to wiped your mouth off with. "You think you could be-"

You didn't even wait for him to finish his sentence. "I think so." You began to wipe your mouth. “Didn’t we use protection though?”

“‘M not sure. We were both black out drunk, remember?”

The two of you just stared in silence at each other. Neither of you knew what to say. Eddie got up to get you a water bottle. He helped you up and walked you back into his bedroom. You laid down on his bed while he got you another cold towel to put on your forehead. "Maybe it's food poisoning? Or possibly there's a bug going around?" You groaned, the nausea still not going away.

"There's only one way to find out. And we need to be sure." He declared as he placed the wet towel on your forehead. "Listen, I'll go to the store. You stay here, just check on Otis from time to time, please." He threw on a pair of jeans and a Metallica t-shirt. "if you throw up again, let me know." He insisted before he grabbed his keys and left.

You laid there, rethinking your decisions. You regretted most of them. However, If you really were pregnant, that would be the one thing you could not bring herself to regret. Eddie was already an amazing single father to Otis. Maybe things really could work out between the two of you. Maybe you could really be a happy little family. You had a little bit of hope.

[54t411]

I Hate Jodi Picoult’s My Sister’s Keeper and think her saying the movie was trash adaptation was a stupid opinion despite her being the author.

Here’s why

| SPOILERS for My Sister’s Keeper |

Jodi Picoult, or as I will refer to her by her last name, is famous for her many novels she has published such as the subject for today: My Sister’s Keeper. A book about a young girl named Anna fighting for the right to her autonomy after being born to be her older sister’s , Kate, organ donor for her dire medical condition.

This story is based on the televised and sensational case of Marissa and Anissa Ayla who shocked the world when the Ayla parents conceived Marissa to save their 16-year old daughter with Leukemia. The story ends happily with both sisters succeeding in life as Marissa helped make her older sister cancer free.

Picoult saw that and decided to take the story and make it into a romance and idiotic novel we know as My Sister’s Keeper. The plot followed what the Ayla sisters went through but Picoult made it her own. She added a steamy oh so necessary romance between Anna’s lawyer, which Anna got when she decided she no longer wanted to give her body to be cut open for her sister, and her court appointed caretaker, which she got when her parents became inadequate to care for her while the court proceedings took place.

Not to mention, at the end of the novel, when Anna wins her case and is driving with her lawyer, they get into a car wreck. Anna becomes brain dead. She becomes fucking brain dead after all her hard work to gain back the right to her own body. What’s the first thing her parents do when they realize she is brain dead? They mourn her, of course, before USING her body that she fought so hard for them not to use and gave her organs to her sister Kate and other kids in need of organs.

Anna was born an organ donor and died being nothing more than an organ donor. The one thing she begged not to be.

Terrible. I wasted 2 weeks reading a book only to be disappointed. If I wanted a trashy book I would have picked Haunting Adeline. I didn’t enjoy the book and I hated how in the end Kate got better and the stupid lawyer and court appointed caretaker got together. What was the point of the whole book?? That fighting for your rights is useless because when you die people will go against everything you fought for??

What is this?? The Hunger Games??

I finished the book and decided with all my brain cells that remained to watch the movie adaptation with Alex Baldwin.

I won’t lie. I enjoyed the movie. In where the book failed to catch my appeal, the movie created something more with it. In the end of the movie, Kate dies but Anna wins rights for her body. But Kate isn’t mad, she wanted Anna to be her own person and Kate mentioned how she wanted to die because she was in constant pain. It was a beautiful movie about grieving and the acceptance of death.

It was everything the book failed to be. It showed what grief and the beauty of life looks like in a movie form.

Yet Picoult complained and said the movie went away from the book. Horrible, she called it. Well Picoult, if I wrote a shitty novel and saw how the adaption was much better- I’d be mad too.

Picoult failed to understand how the movie helped resonate with audiences and capture their emotions into a coherent narrative as where hers failed.

She tried to be too many things and failed at even being one. I stay up at night hating how she failed at understanding such a simple concept. People such as this shouldn’t be authors. Yet I will commend the fact her stupid book has drove me insane for years now.

Good fucking job, Jodi. You wrote a shitty book and now I’m here saying it’s shit. An author’s dream because all commentary is free promo for your book.

Anyhow, check mate, read better books people. There are more things to literature than half baked romances.

- anon 🦖

[amethystunarmed]

Somebody's Gotta Do It

Word Count: 925 AO3 Link Part 2 Ted Spankoffski visits Duke Keane with an important request.

It had been a long day. Duke had gotten back to his office an hour after he was supposed to leave for the day. He is exhausted; the last visit he went on ended with a call to the police. Despite his insistent recommendations, they had sent Officer Sweetly as well, which had only escalated the situation. It had gotten so stressful, Duke somehow managed to dial a number he knew could help him, only to forget it halfway through. Maybe Miss Holiday at the high school is right, and he needs an assistant to help lighten the road. Ever since Miss Holloway died, he has been scattered, his memory full of holes. An extra hand around the office wouldn’t be remiss.

Unfortunately, today he does not have that extra hand. Instead he has a headache, a mountain of paperwork to fill out, and apparently, someone pacing on his office porch. 

Duke recognizes him. In a town like Hatchetfield, everyone knows everyone, to an extent, but Ted Spankoffski has a reputation that supersedes even small town familiarity. Duke knows the rumors are true firsthand. Ted had been a patron at Miss Retro’s a couple times, until his flirting with both Miss Holloway and Duke himself had gone from annoying to downright infuriating. 

The look on Ted’s face when Miss Holloway had-

Duke shakes his head, clearing it.

It had culminated, somehow. Like most things surrounding Miss Holloway, Duke can’t remember a lot, just that they had laughed about it. The gap in his memory feels warm, like the space on a counter where a cup of coffee had just been sitting. There is no sign of what was once there, only the impression of something pleasant.

Duke has a lot of pleasant impressions to look back on these days. Miss Holiday says it's natural, that the grieving brain will protect itself, and Duke knows that. He is missing entire years of his childhood centralized around the time when his dad died. But still, he feels guilty, forgetting her like that. Apparently he had found her body, and didn’t have the decency to remember until the police had shown up at his door for a second round of questioning. 

It makes him want to scream and tear his hair out and pound his fists against his head until she gives him his memories back-

The reminiscing means he’s more than a little frustrated when he gets out of his car. Ted perks up like a dog at the sound of the car door. 

“Fucking finally!” He says, like he isn’t loitering outside the building well after business hours are over. “I thought you would never show.” 

Duke shoots him a smile that he hopes looks less like a grimace than it feels. “I’m sorry, business hours are closed. If you like, I will be open tomorrow morning.”

“What, no! I’ve been waiting here since before your hours ended, you can check the cameras!”

Duke takes a deep breath, and prays to every deity he can think of for patience. “I had other commitments today, which you would know if you had tried to make an appointment. I have availability tomorrow?”

Ted frowns, thick eyebrows furrowing. He has nice features, if a little oily. Duke would almost call him handsome if it wasn’t for the terrible attitude. “No, no, tomorrow won’t work, can’t you just-”

“Later in the week then, if you need. On my website, you can schedule an appointment in any of the open slots-”

“No, that’s too late, you don’t understand-”

Duke is cutting this off before it can even begin. “No, you don’t seem to understand. I have set a boundary that you seem incapable of respecting,” Duke says as neutrally as he can. His jaw is tight with frustration, and it only makes his head pound harder. Flickers of memory worm through his brain, and Duke is getting the distinct feeling this isn’t the first time he’s said this to Ted. “Not that it has ever stopped you before. Have a good night.”

He brushes past Ted, eager to get inside and lock the door when a hand clamps on his wrist. Duke takes another deep breath. He doesn’t want to give the police another call tonight, particularly not after he cold-cocks Ted for not being able to keep his hands to himself.

(Not that I condone violence.)

But when he looks up at Ted, he finds himself at a loss. Any of the previous frustration on Ted’s face has melted away. He is gazing at Duke with wide, desperate eyes. His fingers are tight around Duke’s wrist, keeping him locked in place, like an anchor in a storm. Duke hasn’t seen someone this desperate since-

Rose.

He doesn’t know when.

“Wait. Please wait,” Ted gasps. “I’m sorry, but it’s for a kid. You like helping kids, right?” Duke gives a reluctant nod, and Ted breathes easier. He still doesn’t let go of Duke’s wrist, like he is afraid Duke will dash away if Ted gives him the chance. 

Ted runs his free hand through his hair, and for the first time, Duke takes note of the bags under his eyes. He wonders when the last time Ted slept was, because he gets the feeling it wasn’t last night. Ted bites his lip, then clicks his tongue. He bounces on his heels, then nods to himself, clearly coming to a decision Duke wasn’t privy to. He looks Duke straight in the eyes.

“I need your help getting custody of my little brother.”

[damonsalvitorewife]

Big Brother

Summary: your brother died and JJ doesn’t like your 

Request: no 

Warnings: talk of death, dead bro, mean comments, JJ being an ass, fluffy end. 

My brother just died and this is how I got my anger and emotions out. I’m sorry if it’s bad. 

MY WORK IS NOT TO BE REPOSTED, TRANSLATED OR COPIED PLEASE DON’T STEAL MY WORK!!

*******************************************************

You’re on your way to the Château for the first time since your brother just died you haven’t really been up to hanging out much is Justin died he died three months ago and it’s been really hard. Justin was your rock. Both of your parents passed away when you were seven since then Justin has been there whenever you needed him wherever you needed him I guess until now .

“ hey yn look who finally decided to show up” JB said giving you a hug.

“ it’s good to see you guys.”  You  said giving Sarah a hug.

“ how have you been since Justin?” Sarah asked. 

You spelt, tears sting in your eyes at the mention of Justin‘s nam. 

“ i’ve been all right it’s just hard because I still tried to call him and text him and I wake up and realize he’s gone.” You say in a sad tone. 

“ come on we have to go pick JJ and Pope up.” JB said.

JJ maybank he never really liked you don’t know why he just… anytime you talk to get mad at you randomly for no reason to hurt your feelings sometimes but just you know, we said that tell men wore. 

You were torn away from your thoughts by JJ speaking. 

“ ugh, who invited Miss emotional.” JJ asked clearly upset. 

“ I did she needs to get out of her house.” Sarah said.  

“ oh, so we’re babysitters now is that it?” Jj said with an eye roll. 

“ dude stop being such a dick all the time.” Kie said.

“ I’m not being a dick all I’m saying is that why can’t she go hang out with her brother or some shit? Why does she have to hang out with us?” 

Jj said.

You start tearing up at his words.

“ I mean come on man look at her she’s already crying again. He said pointing a finger at her. 

“ John B can you just take me home? I’m sorry for intruding. OK I’m didn’t even wanna be here. you know what fuck you.  if I could hang out with my brothers still I would be instead of sitting here. Bitch about how I’m fucking snob and stuck up when I’ve done literally nothing to you. I’m sorry that my brother just died and that I have nobody anymore OK but don’t worry I’ll be off the island soon enough!!” 

Right then all there faces dropped as JB pulled up to the dock you jumped off with all your belongings and ran to your car. 

“ JJ what the actual fuck is wrong with you. She just lost her brother. The only family she had left. And your mad at her for grieving! How much more of a dick could you be? Hm?” Sarah yelled at him.

“ I-I didn’t know. I’m I’m sorry. I’m really sorry okay?” Jj said flustered. 

“ okay. First of all how the fuck did you not know? Second of all why are you telling us sorry when it should be yn you need to  apologizing to?” Pope said. 

“ okay okay I’m going.” The blond said 

Time skip at your house. ( sorry I’m lazy) 

“ what do you want Jj? Hm? To make fun of me some more?” You asked anger laced in your voice. 

“ no. No actually I came to say I’m sorry. And I am I’m sorry for today and not only today but every other day too. It’s just your so nice and pretty and I- I don’t know. I just.. I know I’m out of your league and I didn’t want to get attached. But it’s not about me it’s about you and I’m really sorry.” The blond looked at you shyly. 

Your heart felt like it was on fire. He liked you. JJ Maybank liked you. 

“ I want to say it’s okay but it’s not J. Everything you said really hurt me. But I do like you too.” You admitted. 

“ Is there any way I can make it up to you.” He asked a little taken back with the fact that you like him. 

“ actually two things. One you stay and we hang out eat some dinner and learn more about each other. And two you take me on a date.”  You said with a slight smile. 

“ absolutely.” He said with a huge smile on his face. 

Things may not be good right now, but maybe with JJ and the pouges things could eventually get better. 

[sam-winchester1327]

Story- My Own Funeral

My Own Funeral.

I sit and watch the funeral bordering the time limit it was set for. In their defense, it's a graveyard, and who will stop a funeral full of grieving people? I shadow the crowd of only a few weeping people. Those weeping people were some of what I learned to be my true friends, the people who cared, only a very small percentage of the people I knew. I guess the others just wanted sympathy and attention. They just wanted to play the “my friend just died” card. They were over the world about my supposed death. 

I leave before the funeral ends. I retreated to my apartment. Elizabeth Burch was now gone, just a memory. Only little do I regret what I did. I regret leaving my friends, even though it's probably best. I already bought a new car with a new license plate under the name, “Clara Walls”. Almost all of my belongings were already in the trunk. The only things that remained were the items that I could easily carry. As the sun started to set, I piled myself into the small bug-looking car and drove approximately 3 hours outside of town, far from any hospitals. I got to a town where the missing posters hadn’t been taken down yet. Not far enough. It didn't matter though, this was only a spot to stop at a gas station for a snack. I know they wouldn't know me from the posters. I had changed my hair from a long flowing blonde to a vibrant black short layered cut. I finally arrived at our destination. A cabin on the outskirts of a small town in Oregon. It may not have been out of state,  but it would work.

TIME SKIP: 13 years.

I've been living in Crescent, Oregon for about 13 years now. I have been doing detective work. It doesn't bring in many exciting things, mainly just petty theft. I adopted one of the K-9 puppies that couldn't work a few years back. Grim was a black, long-haired German Shepherd. He was my best friend. Work was somewhat boring, well up until Jan 14, 2019. I look down at my desk, still a little hungover from having my 31st birthday the night before. I read something that made my heart almost stop. Shit. It was a break in the case of Elizabeth Burch from Portland Oregon. My family had a thing for keeping things as they’ve always been. For example, when my older sister went off to college, her room was untouched. It was like she never left. 

There was a break in the case. A book of the maps of Oregon had been found. A book of maps where the town that I had found to be home, had a small dog-eared page. I vaguely remember hiding that in the bottom of a wardrobe somewhere. Why? Why had they gone into my old room? After 13 years to the day. Then it hit me. 13 had always been my favorite number. They must have remembered that. I had been just 18 when I “died”. I realized what I had to do. I had to confess what happened. Why I had to get out, this was going to be a “fun” drive. I get home and pack a few things into a bag. As I’m packing when my boss calls about the case. Crap. I try to explain everything. He surprisingly isn’t mad. I look at him as I did my father. The fact he wasn’t mad made me tear up and I started to cry. I hung up, finished packing, packed Grim into the car, and went back to Portland as Elizabeth Burch. 

After a long 3 hours, I arrived in Portland. I drive into town and the first place I stop is my own grave. Wait. There is someone there. Then I realize who's at my grave. It's Wyatt. He was one of my best friends when I was Elizabeth. I get out of the car and walk up to him.” Wyatt”? I ask. He looks back like he’s seen a ghost. Well I mean he kinda has. “Lizzy”? I nod. He runs and hugs me. He then does something I didn’t expect. He gives me a well-deserved bitch slap. I’m not even mad, all I say is, “Fair enough”. “What in the world were you thinking, did you not think of us” he yells at me. I do not respond, all I do is give a confused look. “We missed you terribly. You should probably know this, Lucy is dead.” I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Lucy was one of my best friends when I was Elizabeth. Wyatt can tell by my face that I’m about to cry. He pulls me into a hug and we talk for a while at my grave. 

We decided to walk into town and go to the diner we always went to. We are about to order our regulars when the waitress recognizes me. “Elizabeth”? She asks. When I nod she goes on about how I wouldn’t know her but she never gave up hope and knew I would come back. When she catches herself talking too much she apologizes and takes our orders. We get our food and continue talking. After we pay and are saying our goodbyes he slips in an, ” I love you”. I stop mid-sentence. Had I heard that correctly? “What”? I ask, still a bit in shock. “Here, this will clear it up”. He strides right up to me and kisses me. When we pull away my face feels like it’s on fire. He takes out a pen and writes his new number on my hand. He nods and says, “Now get out of here and go see your parents”. 

[alphinias]

Jeremiah is so INSUFFERABLE in the first three episodes and I actually can’t believe this is the BJ season and audiences are supposed to root for them? This man hasn’t talked to belly in like almost a year and the first real conversation they have about Susannah dying and then not talking he thrOWS HER BREAK UP IN HER FACE AND BASICALLY SAYS I TOLD YOU SO???? Like hmm.. I thought he was the “nice one” who was empathetic and cared more for belly? Like I’m sorry in what world bc he clearly only cares about himself? And the way he like at any given opportunity during the car ride up to cousins and when they were going to see aunt Julia was calling Conrad an asshole and shit talking him unprovoked… never once giving his brother grace for GRIEVING their mother??? Like the stark parallel to the fisher boys fighting/not communicating vs the Conklin siblings fighting and Steven and Taylor having a convo where Steven admits he was wrong and doesn’t shit talk belly with the clear intention of making things right once he sees belly again? Like Jeremiah makes everything about his feelings, he’s so selfish!!!!!!!!!! and thinking that we have already sat through belly assuaging his ego (“I called you first not him” meanwhile like the bold face lie bc we know she would’ve called Conrad had she not acted like a fool at that funeral) and are gonna have to sit through it to prove narratively that he’s the better choice (for the time being) makes me wanna gauge my eyeballs out!!!! He makes my blood boil

Yeah, I’m not going to act like both Jeremiah and Conrad don’t have flaws, because they definitely do, but personally Jeremiah’s drive me insane. The selfishness is a huge ick for me (and so is the fact that he can’t even change a tire! Ew!). One is too selfless and the other is selfish so there’s no choice whatsoever for me.

And he’s spent his whole life competing with Conrad and it’s clear there’s a part of him that jumps on every opportunity to think less of him for this reason or that. I did like the brother talk at the end, but the constant shit talking is super annoying. I do think a part of it is Jeremiah grieving in his own way too and taking certain things out on Conrad, which I can understand how that works for that character but still don’t personally like. I do love how Belly and Steven will fight like cats and dogs but ultimately for the most part they’d be like “no one can shit talk my sibling but me.”

In comparison to Jeremiah, Conrad’s main flaw is thinking he has to do everything himself, even to the detriment of people around him, but he was making so much progress with Belly and telling her so many things he’s never told anyone. They’re super compatible. But then he backslid because he’s an 18 year old kid and his mom died, so personally I can’t be too mad at him for that.

I think ultimately, even though he irritates me, I can see why someone else might like Jeremiah. Just not for Belly over Conrad.