#I said no thank you but I do actually need to go to work
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muletia · 3 days ago
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[tfp] optimus prime x human!reader
summary: you had to go on a business trip. optimus doesn't take it too well
cw: obsessed!optimus, hardcore pinning, angst, i wanted to practice writing dialogues and it shows lmao
word count: 1800
an: i want you guys to know that i am reading EVERY reblog and comment from you swirling my hair and kicking my legs like a schoolgirl
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you are so real for that anon
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When you, out of your own free will, expressed the desire to join him on patrol, Optimus was overjoyed. You rarely got the chance to be together, just the two of you, always consumed by work or saving the world. And although Optimus wouldn’t dare ask you outright to accompany him on patrols (because the last thing he wanted was to make you feel uncomfortable), he deeply longed to spend more time with you alone. He knew he was feeding only his own illusions, fueling the machinery of madness, but by this point, he couldn’t stop. Not when you sat comfortably on his seat, gazing at the views outside the window, visibly content with your outing together.
He wanted so badly for this to be your everyday reality. Maybe then he could finally find some relief from his fixation, maybe you would even save him.
"Hey," you started, and his entire attention focused on you. "Actually, I’ve been meaning to tell you this for a while."
Oh.
Did your feelings match his? Did you feel affection for him as well? Had you noticed his suffering? Or maybe you wanted to reject him, once and for all, to make him understand that his passion was an illusion, that no matter how much he wanted it, the two of you could never be together — too incompatible, too different. That he had developed this coping mechanism, exhausted by the war.
But before Optimus could spiral further, you crushed his hopes.
"The company I work for is sending me on a business trip," you sighed, clearly dissatisfied with the news. "It’s supposed to take two weeks, but you never really know with these trips, especially since they’re sending me across the continent."
"I understand," he replied, his tone not betraying the turmoil within. "What does this business trip involve?"
"Oh, shoot, sorry! I should have explained that right away," you laughed casually as if you hadn’t just delivered news that shattered his spark. "Business trip is assigned by an employer for training sessions, conferences, exhibitions, and other boring stuff. Kind of like a mission, but without explosions, action, or danger."
It was good to hear that you’d be safe, though you would truly be safest only at the base, under his watchful optics.
Pessimistic, ugly thoughts churned in his processor. Of all the things he expected to hear from you, this wasn’t one of them. Suddenly, he feared being alone, feared his own dreams. Because he knew you wouldn’t be there to comfort him after a nightmare, and nothing else could bring him peace.
"I am sorry to hear we will not see each other for two weeks," he said, "but I am confident you will do exceptionally well on this assignment. You are dependable, unyielding. You can handle anything."
"Oh, thank you," you answered, a bit flustered. You hadn’t expected a compliment. "It just makes me sad to leave Jasper. I don’t say it often enough, but I have a wonderful time with all of you. With you."
"Likewise, [Name]. When are you leaving?"
"The day after tomorrow. Tomorrow after work, I’ll say goodbye to everyone else."
So soon. Too soon. He’d hoped you wouldn’t leave until next week, to at least give him time to mentally prepare for the separation, but you denied him that luxury. Not that any amount of time would have prepared him for this.
Slowly, subtly enough that you wouldn’t notice the change, he reduced his speed, prolonging your shared drive.
"I’m not sure I’ll have time to write," you warned. "Unfortunately, they’ve given me a really tight schedule. But! If I can, I’ll write to the kids. Oh, and expect some souvenirs — I’ll bring something back for you all."
"You do not need to spend your valuable time searching for trinkets. But if you insist, I will cherish anything you bring me."
"Aw, don’t worry—it’ll be no trouble." You waved your hand dismissively. "You do so much for me, for the kids, for the whole Earth without asking for anything in return. You deserve something nice."
"I do not protect your planet for glory or offerings."
"I know, I know. That’s very noble. And amazing. So many years, sticking firmly to your values."
He eagerly soaked up your praise, allowing himself, if only for a brief moment, to forget the world around him, to forget his duties, unfulfilled promises, fallen brothers and sisters. He’d never describe himself as 'amazing', nor did he believe the praise his own kind gave him about his greatness. But for you, he could believe it. If only for a moment, a few seconds, so that you’d leave on your mission thinking warmly of your time together and of him.
"Thank you, [Name]. Please know that I value your words tremendously."
"Oh," you blushed, "that’s nice to hear."
Embarrassed, you quickly changed the subject, unaware that Optimus was watching you closely, curious about your reaction. For now, he pushed thoughts of your departure to the back of his processor, wanting to fully enjoy your presence. You recommended songs from the country genre, one of his favorite discoveries on Earth, which he promised to listen to later. He knew well that this would lead to more daydreaming, imagining a future that would never be. Because no matter how hard he tried, his tomorrow would not be entwined with yours. His desires would forever remain mere fantasies born out of desperation, longing, and sorrow.
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A week had passed since you left. In the lives of the Autobots, not much had changed because of your absence; they went on with their chaotic schedule. The kids, however, missed you. No more evenings spent helping them with their homework, working on your reports, playing games, or simply chatting. The worst part was that no one really knew what was going on with you. You rarely messaged, didn’t have time to talk, and when you did, it was just to say, "I’m alive, it’s boring, I’ll message you on Thursday." Life continued, despite how much Miko wished she could play games with you instead of doing her homework.
Everyone managed to adapt to your absence.
With one exception.
At first glance, it seemed like Optimus, the bot with whom you shared the closest bond, hadn’t been affected by such a drastic change. Nothing in his behavior indicated any longing. He didn’t express his opinion on the matter, didn’t ask, didn’t demand. As always, he buried his feelings deep within, playing the role of a diligent leader, hiding from everyone the nightmares running through his processor, now even more intense because of your absence.
He was withering, quietly and alone.
Until now, he had been content simply watching you. He had established a routine, unhealthy as it was, that kept him going. He knew that most of the time when he returned from patrol or a mission, you would be at the base. Even if you came every other or every third day, Optimus knew that eventually, you would show up. It gave him a sense of stability amidst the chaos surrounding him. But now? Maybe two weeks wasn’t a big challenge for you, but he was done after one.
Now, he wanted to be more than a passive observer. He craved physical contact, to hold you close, to feel your heartbeat against his metal. He wanted to know you were alive, to feel your pulse under his digit, to listen to its rhythm, to understand how your chest moved against his metal. He wanted to feel, taste, touch, enter.
He kept glancing at the spot on the couch where you usually sat with your laptop on your lap or spent time with the kids as if hoping that if he looked just one more time, you would materialize there. That everything would return to normal, that he wouldn’t suffer so much, that you would give him the daily dose of antidote he needed to function without plunging deeper into despair. But no matter how many times he looked, you weren’t there, and wouldn’t be for another week.
At some point, however, someone noticed their leader’s miserable mood.
"I can’t quite figure out what kind of bond you have with that woman," Ratchet said, pausing his work to look at Optimus. Before his friend could answer, he continued, "But she’ll be back soon. And whatever she’s doing, she’ll do it well. She’s tough."
"Thank you, old friend. I have no doubt in her abilities. But I would feel better if she were stationed closer to the base in case of a Decepticon attack."
"Mm-hmm," the medic scoffed. "Sure, that’s all it’s about."
Optimus had no response to that. He wasn’t surprised that Ratchet noticed his infatuation, but he would prefer that his friend not delve into the details of their relationship. At least, not yet. Not while Optimus himself was a wreck.
"Hey, hey! [Name] messaged!" Miko yelled.
The Autobot leader immediately approached the platform, finally abandoning his conversation with Ratchet, aware that it would only spark more suspicions. But he didn’t care anymore, not in such an important moment.
He stood directly behind Miko, with Bumblebee and Bulkhead beside him, equally curious to know what you had been up to over the past week.
"She sent photos, too! Look!"
Miko turned to show the messages to the others but paused when she noticed Optimus’s helm close to her.
“Whoa,” she whispered, surprised that out of all the bots, he was the one standing the closest. She swallowed, but her confidence quickly returned.
Holding her phone firmly, she displayed a close-up selfie of you. You were smiling, though the bags under your eyes betrayed that you were sleep-deprived, probably exhausted.
Optimus felt the accumulated stress, pain, and longing of the past week slowly dissipate. Everything was fine with you. You were alive, pushing forward with a smile on your face, happy to simply exist. Admiring your photo didn’t compare to seeing you in person, but it let him vent a little easier, granting him a brief respite from worry, gnawing at him from within. It was enough. For now. For a moment.
“She sends her regards to everyone,” Miko went on, “Oh, and she also asked Ratchet to take a break and mentioned she already bought a gift for Optimus and can’t wait to come back. Hey, I want a present, too!”
Optimus couldn't be certain if another week apart wouldn’t inflict even more damage on his processor and spark, or if longing would eventually consume him entirely. But he knew he was already lost, that you held sway over every aspect of his life. He was wrapped around your finger, tethered by a leash you didn’t even realize existed. And he didn’t mind one bit.
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threeacttragedy · 2 days ago
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Entry 3 – The One About That Guy, That Girl, and the Dragon
I’m just going to jump right on my magical pixie pony for this one – because why the fuck not? But, I promise this speculation has a foundation of fact. So, there’s that.
On Sunday, November 10, 2024 – seemingly out of nowhere – Zoe McConnell posted to her IG stories a picture of Nicola from a photoshoot from November 2022.  Yes, you read that right – 2022. Zoe reposted this to her stories exactly two years from the day she first posted it to her grid.
Why?
Uh, happy anniversary to the picture? [feel free to scratch your head in confusion because I sure as shit did – but only for a second]
Who cares about a photoshoot from 2022?
And, don’t even get me started on the weird ass suggestion this was a push for Nicola to win – what bullshit award show is up next? – People’s Choice Awards. Actually, do get me started on that because that theory just makes my eyes roll.  The only connection I see here is that the dress Nicola is wearing was from her 2022 Glamour Awards appearance.  What exactly does that have to do with People’s Choice? Nothing.
Now, forget all about that shit and keep reading.
What IS interesting about this post from Zoe is that, if you’re a certain creator or anyone who has ever read this certain creator’s timeline, you’d know that this picture is referenced in said timeline (P.S. My disclaimer today is that I am not a fan of said creator but that doesn’t negate the information she has distributed to the masses).
Here’s what happened two years ago:
On November 9, 2022, Nicola posted one of Zoe’s images to her own grid, thanking Glamour for her award. Luke liked this post.
On that same day, Nicola posted a second set of pictures from that same photoshoot. Luke did not like that post.
The following day, November 10, 2022, Zoe posted one of those additional pictures to her own grid. Luke liked that post from Zoe’s grid. But, he did not go back and like Nicola’s second grid post from the day before. Why? Why go to Zoe's grid instead of Nicola's to like the pictures? I could speculate on this for the next eight minutes but I’ll let you come to your own conclusion.
So, this past Sunday, Zoe posts to her stories a link to that November 10, 2022 grid post that Luke liked. Nicola reposted Zoe’s story to her own IG stories. If you’re a Nicola fan, I can probably guess what you're going to do next. You’re going to click on Nicola’s story – which takes you to Zoe’s page – and when you click on Zoe’s stories – it takes you to the original November 10, 2022 post, which Luke liked at that time.
Odd, that.
And, by “odd,” I mean odd in the fact that no one cares about a two-year-old picture. I mean, really, who fucking cares? Except Lukolas who see Luke’s like on the original post.
Let’s keep moving.
On November 11, 2024, Zoe was right back at it. She posted to her IG stories another picture of Nicola from the same photoshoot. This time it was the one Zoe originally posted back on November 11, 2022. Yay, another anniversary. Zoe put a cutesy little caption that read: “Princess Peach.” Nicola did not reshare this story. I mean, at this point, we’re all watching Zoe, right? No need to reshare because our Lukola interest has been peaked, in my opinion.
Then, a few hours after Zoe’s post, Rachell Smith, also a photographer, posted an old picture of Luke to her grid. This picture isn’t as old as Zoe’s but it does go back to May 2024. Rachell follows it up with an IG story of the same image with the song, “Lifting You” by Jungle. Take a moment and go look up the lyrics and meaning of that song. Fine, fine, fine. I’ll just tell you. The song is about being deeply committed and doing whatever is needed to make a relationship work (this, per Mr. Google). Rachell’s caption? “[O]ur knight and shining [Luke].”
Well, fuckety fuck fuck fuck.
We have a princess and we have a knight.
Interesting.
I mean, we grew up with this idea that the knight in shining armor saved the princess, right?
To be honest, yesterday, I had no clue what that was all about (and I really didn't care -- the seas have been rough for the USS Lukola lately) so I went about my day like normal.
But, this morning, the wheels and cogs in my head started working together.
I wondered how that ever came about – the idea that a knight saved a princess.
So, I asked Mr. Google: “Where did the story about a knight rescuing a princess originate?”
Okay, yeah, I see Perseus and Andromeda…and in Western culture….Saint George and the Dragon…
Wait --
What?
Saint George and the Dragon?
Nope. Not possible.
But, I was certain it was.
I scurried over to Tiktok to find the post I’d seen a few months earlier about the medallion Luke wore for a long time – the one Nicola allegedly gave him. The TT creator believed that the necklace depicted none other than Saint George and the Dragon! Now, I must add that this has never been confirmed but the TT creator did make a fairly convincing argument for it. This is also the necklace Luke was allegedly wearing in the “Polin” picture that was released simultaneously by Nicola and Luke on October 21, 2024 (based on the chain of the necklace he was wearing).
Delulu?
Yeah, maybe.
But, we also can’t make this shit up.
Edit (11/14/2024): Today, Luke's People Magazine photoshoot came out. Guess who his photographer was? Zoe McConnell.
Again, we can't make this shit up.
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The Shy One
Inspired by this post; in the same universe as this and this
Warnings: non/dubcon, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Character: Bucky Barnes
Summary: a night out ends in an embarrassing encounter.
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️
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It feels like you’re seeing the world through tinted glass. The low lights, the buzz of voices, and the subtle clink of glasses feed the haze around you. That and the cocktail in your hand. Just ice now. Your second. You’re surprised how easily it went down. 
“Want another?” Mikayla asks as you play with the thin straw. 
“Maybe not yet,” you shrug. 
She grins at Alina, “lightweight?” 
The other women laugh. You’re too embarrassed to admit it but you are. In fact, it’s the first time you’ve ever tasted alcohol. If they don’t mock you for confessing, they wouldn’t believe you. 
“So happy you came out,” Katy grins. 
“Yeah, too bad you didn’t make the work mixer last month,” Lu says. 
“Hm, yeah, I just... I couldn’t make it,” you chew your lip. 
“Mmm, Mik,” Katy purrs, “you seeing what I’m seeing?” 
Katy tilts her head and Mikayla follows her gaze. Alina and Lu do the same and you dare to peek after them. There’s a table of men across the bar. There timbre forms a dulcet drone amid the din. 
“Sexy, look at that beard.” Alina slithers 
“Which one?” Lu giggles. 
You shift and look down at your glass. You wrap both your hands around it and squirm. They said it was just work drinks. You don’t want to be dealing with strangers. 
“Oh, honey, loosen up,” Alina grabs your starched collar and pops the top button. “You have another one of those and you’ll be dancing on the table.” 
“Um,” you lean away from her, “maybe. Erm, I need to go to the restroom.” 
“Boo, too early to break the seal,” Katy whines. 
“Sorry,” you apologise and stand. 
You take your glass with you and as you turn, you stop short as your eyes meet another pair. One of the men from the crowded table catches you in his gaze. You gulp and quickly lower your chin. You hurry on to the bar and set your empty glass on it. 
“Thanks,” you say. 
“Oh, thanks,” the man behind it swipes it away. “The waitress coulda grabbed that.” 
“Oh, now worries,” you show a palm and turn to find the restroom. 
You head down the hallway behind the bright blue sign. You dip into the ladies and claim a stall. As nice as it is to release the pressure, it’s even nicer to get a breather. You’re not the bar type. Not a drinker or a dancer, as much as Alina keeps suggesting it. You’re a total square. Thirty years old and you’ve never done anything more fun than laser tag. 
You wash your hands and leave the bathroom reluctantly. The music seems louder as you come out, the voices too. As you enter the barroom, you slow down. You’re mortified to find Alina and Katy in the open space, dancing. Grinding against each other. 
You stand there, frozen and embarrassed. The other women at the table cheer them on lewdly. You don’t know what to do. Sitting with Lu and Mikayla would draw as much attention as joining the dancing. This doesn’t seem like the place for that. 
Maybe it’s time for you to go. You’re feeling a bit cloudy and your eyes are fuzzy. You’ve been up since five in the morning. 
You slowly cross the space but have to dodge as Alina spins out and nearly crashes into you. In an effort to avoid her, you hit the side of a table, bouncing off of it and staggering until you fall onto something soft. Thank gosh you managed to find a seat in your descent. 
“Mmph,” the grunt greets you with the firm cushion beneath you, “y’alright, doll?” 
You look over in horror at the man who’s lap you sit upon. How embarrassing!! You look around at the other men at the table as it dawns on you. This is the worst crash landing you can imagine. 
You gasp and peer back at the man who serves as your chair. He’s terrifyingly handsome. His eyes are so blue and his jaw is chiseled beneath his dark beard. His brown hair curtains down around his cheekbones and his cheek dimples in amusement. 
“I’m so sorry,” you wriggle against him as he spreads his large hand across your back. “I tripped. I didn’t man to—oh gosh.” 
You touch your scalding forehead and try to shimmy out of his lap. It’s useless as you can’t get much of a stronghold. You just manage to ground your butt down on him. 
“You okay there?” He runs his fingertips up your spine and sends a shiver through you. 
“I’m--- sorry!” You gulp out again. “Please, I’m--” you grab the corner of the table and manage to haul yourself up. “I’m so...” you shake your head and bluster. You’re burning in humiliation. You can feel the other men watching you. “Ugh.” 
You turn and scurry around Alina and Katy. You quickly gather up your purse and coat as the women at the table laugh. “Oh, honey, why don’t you give him a nice ride,” Lu teases. 
You blanch at her and makes a face, “I didn’t mean to--” 
“Oh, chill,” Mikayla chides. “Really, it was funny. Where are you going?” 
“Home,” you exclaim. “Stop laughing at me. You’ve been laughing at me all night.” 
Lu scoffs, “well, you’re a bit silly, aren’t you? Act like you’ve never touched a man or a drink before.” 
You frown and flutter your lashes against the singe of hot tears. This is why you always say no. Why you are always ‘busy’. You don’t fit in. You’re better off alone. 
You hug your coat and bag and hurry across the bar. You push through the door and stagger out into the night with a sniffle. Oh joy, work is going to be even worse. Now they’re going to sit around and cackle at you instead of Wendy and her tacky dresses. 
You look around, searching for your bearings. You need to find a cab and get out of here. You see once coming down the pavement. You shift your things into one arm and throw your other up. The taxi steers towards the sidewalk but picks up another pedestrian further down. 
You huff and crane in search of another escape. 
“Hey, doll,” a rocky voice calls over the hinges of the bar door. “Where’re you off to?” You continue to peer down the street, frightened as you feel a gentle nudge on your elbow, “hey, talking to you. You didn’t even give me a name after you sat right on me.” 
You flinch and reel away from him, “huh? What? Oh, I’m sorry. That was just... clumsy.” 
“Ah, it’s fine. Really. It was funny,” he assures you. “I’m not making fun of you. Just, a pretty girl falls right in my lap then runs away, I kinda gotta wonder...” 
“Umph?” You furrow your brow, “you’re making fun of me too.” 
“Why would I do that?” He tilts his head. “Come back inside. Let me by you a drink.” You shake your head and wave your hand past him at another yellow cab. He chuckles softly, “you don’t gotta be shy.” 
“I don’t know you,” you insist. 
“I’m tryna fix that,” he counters. 
“Really, I just wanna go home,” you whine as the taxi drives by without stop. 
“Right, let’s do that,” he turns and throws his hand up. He whistles and wiggles his fingers. A cab rolls right up to him. “Let’s go.” 
He opens the back door and stands back. You stare at it. 
“Thanks,” you sigh in relief. You get in, ducking through the door, greeting the driver with a polite, “hello.” 
Yet the door doesn’t close. Instead, you’re urged further inside by the man as he sits on the seat next to you. You slide over as he pulls the door shut behind him. 
“Tell him where we’re going, doll,” he commands. 
You look at him, then the driver. You’re too stunned to think. What is he doing? You give your address and curl your shoulders as you shrink down. 
“Now,” the man stretches his arm across the seat, “we got the whole ride to get to know each other,” he offers his other hand, “I’m Bucky, I hear I make a pretty comfy seat.” 
You can’t help half a smile. You reach and shake his hand. You suppose he did help you out and he doesn’t seem angry about your unceremonious fall. You give him your name. 
“Thanks,” you say again. 
“Thanks? Oh doll, what kinda fool wouldn’t help a girl like you?” 
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hannieehaee · 2 days ago
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Idk if you're taking requests but I would give it a short and it would mean so much if you actually wrote smthg bout it.
An angsty fic/drabble where woozi and reader are in a long term established relationship and the reader gets their absolute dream job opportunity but it's far from Korea and she tells it to woozi but they get conflicted since woozi cannot transfer between his work and seventeen and reader does not want to give up this once in a life time opportunity. At the same time they are sceptical about a long distance relationship since reader had already been fed up of how less they get to see and stay with woozi with him travelling and working constantly.
You don't have to write it if it's too complex but I'd love to see cuz I really like the way you write!
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content: idol!woozi x nonidol!reader, established relationship, light angst, fluff, long distance relationship, etc.
wc: 716
a/n: thank u so much!! im so sorry for how long i took to get this out!!
masterlist
it'd been a week since you told jihoon about your new work opportunity. a week since the air in your apartment became just a little bit colder and the future slightly more grim.
jihoon had been supportive immediately, congratulating you and insisting on you accepting the position. he'd been as supportive a boyfriend as he'd been in the past two years of your relationship. it filled you with warmth and hope for the future of your relationship.
it wasn't until you'd let him know of the location of said job that things became more sad than hopeful.
although he still maintained his supportiveness, there was now a clear air of worry in his voice any time it'd get brought up.
you'd tried to ignore it, pushing it aside until you found the courage in you to actually accept the position. it was your dream job. a once in a lifetime opportunity. except it was an entire country away from the love of your life. and you only had three more days to accept the offer letter they'd sent to you.
the thought of doing long distance would have been fine had you been anyone else. but you barely got to see your boyfriend as it was. living with him was really the only way for you to spend time together. his busy idol schedule had him going all over the world, and when he was at home he was usually ever at the company or in your shared apartment.
if you left, you'd give up on ever getting to see him.
"babe."
the voice took you away from your train of thought. the same train of thought distracting you for the past week.
you looked away from the tv that had been playing in front of you. you hadn't even been watching it, but the background noise helped.
jihoon was at the entrance of the living room, two mugs in hand as he walked over to you and took his usual seat, silently handing you your mug with a tight smile.
not even a single sip from your drink was taken before the subject filled the room once more.
"you need to take this job."
"jihoon ..."
"no, listen," he turned his body to face you, "you and i, we're a forever thing, okay? i don't care if we have to be away for a while. i'm already living my dream, it's unfair that you don't get to do the same," he argued with conviction in his eyes.
"but, jihoon ... it won't be like when you're touring. we'll never be in the same country at the same time, i-"
his hands went to take your mug, placing it on the coffee table before taking your hands into his own.
"i don't care!", his voice raised without meaning to, "so we'll have a year or two in which we can't be as close as we've always been, so what? it won't matter in the grand scheme of things. we'll be together for forty- no fifty years. a few years of uncertainty won't matter a few years from now. babe, please."
his voice pleaded at you.
he was afraid you'd end it all instead of at least trying.
what made it worse that he refused to consider a possibility in which you didn't go and follow your dream. it was a done deal to him. he loved you that much.
that was all you needed to make a decision.
"i'll take the job," you said decisively.
jihoon released a sigh of relief right away, hand squeezing your own in encouragement.
"i-i'll rent a place big enough for the two of us over there. i'll ask for a week off every six months. i'll have it written into my contract so i can go visit you. and- and we'll keep this place here for any time you have time off. we'll call every night, no matter what. even if it's just for two minutes, we'll- we'll make it work."
all you could do was smile at him.
how could you ever worry about change when he was willing to work so hard to move along with it all?
you kissed him then, shutting him up with no words.
and he understood, kissing you back with just as much unspoken love.
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redrose10 · 3 days ago
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This was a request for fake dating with Jungkook and prompt #40 I think I have always been in love with you for @yoongznme. I hope you like it!
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< Lemonade >
Warnings: Hints of body insecurities
#40 “I think, I have always been in love with you.”
*******************************************************
“I’m sorry what?”, you asked them to repeat themselves for the third time still not believing what you were hearing. When your boss asked to have a word with you about a promotion you thought it would include a few extra responsibilities and hopefully a much needed raise because being a makeup artist for an award winning kpop group did not really pay as well as you’d think.
You never expected to be told that you would be pretending to be Jungkook’s girlfriend though. It was some crazy plan that the company’s PR team came up with after he had recently gotten some bad press over something dumb and out of his control but at the end of the day it was still bad press effecting numbers which effected profit.
They thought that it would be a good idea to make it look like he was a loving, sweet, devoted boyfriend who could do no wrong. Somehow or another your name got thrown in the mix because you yourself were nice, polite, and you had this kind of the good girl next door thing that they were looking for.
You were nervous to say the least. Jungkook was attractive, no one would deny that. He was also always very kind and thoughtful when you interacted and you definitely had a small crush on him but you were a professional and knew not to let your emotions get in the way of your work plus there’s no way a global superstar would ever actually want to date a struggling makeup artist.
However you agreed, though you had the suspicion you really didn’t have a choice anyways if you wanted to stay employed, and they told you to be back at the building tomorrow night at 8pm.
So you did just that. You were in the dress one of the stylist left for you and you’d done your makeup and hair. Jungkook was styled perfectly as usual and he smelled so warm and comforting as he gave you a hug, “You look really nice Y/N.”
“Thank you.”, you whispered hoping he couldn’t see you blush.
The plan was to drive over to a very well known hotspot for dinner. Idols frequented the place constantly so there was also a stream of paparazzi and fans trying to catch a glimpse.
When you arrived the amount of people shocked you. As soon as Jungkook appeared there were earth shattering screams and so many flashes of light you couldn’t see a foot in front of you.
“Y/N, just stay close behind me.”, he said taking your hand and helping you out of the car while making sure to block the view of the cameras so you could get out comfortably in your dress.
Once you were in view the screams got even louder although maybe angrier. The camera flashes definitely increased though giving you a headache. The bodyguards began to push through the crowd with Jungkook close behind, his hand tightly gripping yours as you tried to keep up.
Inside, the restaurant was significantly calmer which you appreciated. Jungkook sipped on his beer while you stuck to a lemonade.
“I’m sorry the company is making you go through this.”, he said finally after a bout of silence.
“It’s okay. They’re paying me quite a bit so it’s worth it.”, you chuckled not noticing the slight grimace on his face.
The rest of the dinner went smoothly. Jungkook was a great guest and you relaxed enjoyed hearing about his travels and all the funny stories he had, especially the one about Yoongi tripping and falling face first into a cake that Namjoon had decided to leave sitting on the living room floor for some strange reason. He showed you a picture of Yoongi’s face covered in frosting and you couldn’t wait to tease him about it when you saw him next.
After dinner the crowd outside had died down a little bit was still enough that you had to put on an act. Jungkook pulled you close against him as he took you outside and right into the waiting vehicle where he continued to hold you against him even as the car sped off. It sent a wave of emotions through you so you made sure to create a little bit of space between you both just to remind yourself that none of this was real.
It looked like the plan was working perfectly because the next morning there were several headlines questioning who was the cute woman Jungkook was photographed with last night. The fans were also loosing their minds over it, posting over and over about speculations and rumors. You did your best to try and avoid most of them because while a good chunk were generally in favor of the relationship there were still many, mostly fans, that were not happy about Jungkook possibly being in a relationship. This resulted in you seeing some hurtful words about yourself m before deciding to log out of all of your social medias.
The next several weeks were filled with much of the same. Various stages photo ops took place so that fans and photographers could catch moments between you both. When the rumors finally started to become out of hand the company released an official statement confirming the relationship between Jungkook and you, a sweet, down to earth makeup artist that he had fallen madly in love with. The media and fans lost their minds.
You went into this whole thing thinking it would be easy. You were getting a big payday to basically hangout with Jungkook and let your photo get taken. You didn’t expect for your crush to grow into being full on in love with him but it was hard not to fall. He was so incredibly thoughtful and sweet. He was always ordering you lunch or bringing you a coffee even when the cameras weren’t around. When your cat needed an unexpected emergency surgery he paid for it in full after overhearing you cry to one of your friends about how you couldn’t afford it. He was always telling you how pretty you looked or complimenting your clothes with a slight hint of a blush on his cheeks. When you were visiting a friend and missed the last bus and you called him as a last resort hoping he could ask the company to send a car he drove over an hour at 2am to personally pick you up himself while staying on the phone with you the whole time so that you wouldn’t be scared.
After a few months of this it was getting harder and harder to remind yourself this wasn’t real.
Up until this point things were going great. Your relationship was doing exactly what the PR team had hoped. People pretty much completely forgot about his previous scandal and were focused on how he was a sweet and generous boyfriend. His image had never been better.
Then there was an incident. Jungkook was very protective always keeping you close to him. Even when the bodyguards reminded him that they were there for your protection as well he still insisted on personally seeing to your safety.
So one morning you were set to board a flight to New York. Of course the entrance to the air port was packed full of paparazzi and fans all screaming and trying to get photos and videos of you two. The airport had put up barriers but with the amount of people all pushing and shoving some of the barriers got knocked down allowing the crowd to surge in.
Security did their best to surround you guys and get you through the crowd but they were greatly outnumbered.
Thanks to the loud noises and flashing lights and amount of people surrounding you it all became too much and you began to panic. You held onto Jungkook, squeezing his hand that was interlocked with yours to try and ground yourself and remind yourself that you were okay.
“It’s okay Y/N. I’ve got you. We’ll get through this.”, he said trying to comfort you.
The crowd surged forward again. Thanks to your blurry vision and panic you aren’t sure exactly what happened but somehow you tripped ending up on the floor. You were trying to get up fast before you got trampled on but you kept getting pushed and shoved down until you felt someone grab your waist and pull you up. Instantly you recognized the familiar cologne and tucked your face into Jungkook’s shoulder as he quickly pulled you through the rest of the airport.
On the plane where it was quiet and safe you started full on crying. You felt so silly but you couldn’t hold it in any more.The fear and anxiety became too much.
Jungkook came over handing you a bottle of water and some ice for your bruised knee. He rubbed soothing circles on your back as the plane took off, “It’s okay Y/N. It’s okay. You’re safe now. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I didn’t protect you.”
“It’s not your fault. You did everything you could.”, you whispered starting to feel a little better.
After a while you managed to fall asleep and take a small nap. When you woke up Jungkook was still sitting next to you. He was staring intently at your face.
“Stop looking at me. I’m always so ugly when I wake up.”, you chuckled feeling much better than earlier.
“Impossible. You are never ugly Y/N.”, he whispered.
He was fidgeting with his shoe lace. Something you had picked up on being a nervous habit of his.
“Hey Kook, is there something on your mind?”, you asked.
He waited a moment before nodding, “When we get back from New York I’m going to tell the company that we need to end this fake dating thing. I can’t do it any more.”
You felt like you wanted to cry again but you swallowed it down because maybe he thought you were too weak or why would he want to be with the girl who tripped an embarrassed herself and himself, “O-Okay. It’s up to you.”
“I just…I’m so selfish”, he chuckled, “I’m not going to keep putting you in danger though. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you Y/N, especially if it was my fault. What happened back at the airport…that was a wake up call. I’m sorry I ever suggested this.”
Your brows furrowed in confusion., “What do you mean you suggested this?” You were under the impression this was all the companys PR team but now it seems like he had a part of it.
His cheeks turned a bright red before he ran a hand through his already messy hair, “Well I guess I might as well come clean now.”, he turned his body to look at you fully, “Y/N when the company suggested this fake dating thing I was against it at first. But then…then I thought maybe I could use it as an excuse to spend more time with you. I’ve always thought you were really cute and sweet and kind and I had a bit of a crush on you. So I convinced them to get you to be the woman I fake dated. I was too shy to ask you to hang out so I thought it was a way to spend time with you and get to know you better.”, he made eye contact with you for a brief moment and you could see the fear in them. He continued, “I think I have always been in love with you. I love you more and more every day.”, your heart was practically beating out of your chest at his confession. You tried to stop him but he continued, “And that’s why we have to end this. I don’t want you getting hurt because of me. You don’t deserve this.”
He looked as if he was about to cry and it made you want to just cuddle him and make everything go away. Instead you chose to grab his hand and hold it on your lap, “Jungkook I love you too. I have for quite a while. Honestly, I didn’t think you would ever see me like that so I thought this was all your company’s idea.”, his shoulders seemed to relax a little at your words so you went on, “I know that dating you comes with lots of hardships but I think the positives greatly outweigh those negatives and I don’t mind going through them. If…if you want to I would like to continue to date you, but maybe actually date and not fake date anymore.”, you chuckled.
That got a big smile out of him too which warmed your heart. “I would love to keep dating you Y/N.”, he nodded. You cuddled in closer to him spending the rest of the flight talking and laughing and enjoying each other’s presence.
When the plane landed he had already arranged for a car to pick you up straight from the tarmac so that you wouldn’t have to endure the stress of walking through the airport with him again.
When he finally made it out front and jumped into the car he smiled at seeing your face, “I missed you Y/N.”, he then leaned in and kissed you like it was nothing new. “You already got into the lemonade didn’t you.”, he chuckled after tasting it on your lips.
“Kook we were only separated for like ten minutes and of course I did. You know lemonade is my favorite.”, you giggled.
He leaned over and rested his head on your shoulder, “Doesn’t matter. It was ten minutes too long.”
You gave the top of his head a kiss as the car sped off to your new destination.
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bitchslapblastoids · 17 hours ago
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Prompted by your post about dnp inviting audience interaction: it /is/ really brave, and so interesting! I haven't been watching them for long at all and one of the biggest things that just drew me in and deeply fascinated me about them is how so much of their work (not just on stage) is in some way a conversation/interaction with their audience and the more you watch the more you notice it. No wonder its easy to be parasocial about them and about the Phandom itself!
To me, at least, they seem to be the sort of performers/creators that need a relatively high level of audience interaction in order to be inspired or for their work to feel meaningful. Like, im absolutely sure they could also create things without this close relationship with their audience but it seems to be what their naturally drawn towards? Obviously the problem has been in maintaining boundaries within that but it seems like that's going better now than at some points in the past, which makes me really happy for everyone!
Sorry about the long yap, this is so interesting to me and I just needed to express it a little
yes!!! i love this!!! so beautifully worded! no need to apologize at all - i am in such hearty agreement and actually think about this so often. i think the engagement with their audience is their superpower, and it runs so deep. what was one of dan's favorite things about phil before he met him? phil's interactive adventure videos, in which he was creating an interactive experience for his viewers.
when they film pinof1 together, what are they doing? they're answering an audience-submitted q&a. the audience interaction is literally baked into their foundation! <3
2010, dan's uni dorm. what's displayed behind him on his wall? art and letters sent to him by viewers. he films danmail vids where he opens and reacts to said art and letters and personally thanks the senders.
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for years and years and years, what's at the end of every phil video? fanart! draw phil naked! (in retrospect literally so weird lol but shhh)
the ongoing avalanche of vyous and younows and tumblr reblogs/follows and responding to yt comments and retweets and and and. so much interaction. the videos directly engaging with twitter and tumblr creations. they see us, they know us, they get us.
their first book? included a double-page spread with dozens of pieces of phanart.
every single one of their tours has multiple essential audience interaction components, and even more brilliantly, with multiple different access points that are perfectly calibrated to their audience. too shy to speak up? send in a submission ahead of time. want to be a part of the masses? shout something out during the audience participation segments! and there's always the likelihood that they'll include fanart in the show itself, casually mention an actual actively popular fic, throw in an ancient phwedding manip, or just build whole segments of the show around our tropes and the world that we created with them. all of that keeps things exciting and engaging on stage, bc you never know exactly what's going to come next. but it also keeps their audience feeling seen, valued, and like co-creators in a way.
When you look at the other britcrew and big yters from the 2010s, they simply weren't generating that ongoing, authentic conversation with their audiences. their approach followed the simple format of: i post, you watch. and then it became: i post, you watch, then i try and sell you something while i call you my 'community' because you are all watching me and sometimes you talk to one another in the comments. but it's not like zalfie or joe and casper etc. were chiming in on the convos too, or at least not in any meaningful way. it wasn't a community in the same way.
dan and phil truly built community. i think communities require mutual exchange, communication, a sense of value and worth, commonly agreed upon truths, shared experiences, touchstones of connection, and leaders who have integrity. i know this is all starting to sound a little lofty, but i really do think dan and phil are good humans who have worked hard to wield their power and influence responsibly and compassionately. they set the tone for us, constructed this world, paid attention to what landed for us, how we responded to things, everything that we were up to in response to what they were up to. they listened. they made us feel seen and celebrated and appreciated, and in turn we continued to celebrate them. they created weird inside jokes, we adopted them, then we all shared the weird inside jokes. they existed, we created our own language and lore and encyclopedia in response, and now there's a whole stage show about it.
that's how you get people sticking around for 15 years. that's how you get people to actually want to spend money on you. and yeah, some more boundaries at times couldn't have hurt. they fostered a sense of proximity and entitlement that obviously put them in harm's way. but i'd say ultimately what they've manage to do has been a net good for them and a tremendous success.
you raised such a good point that it seems to be what they are naturally drawn towards. i think it's because they, too, were fangirls. phil was writing buffy fic. dan was running a lost wiki. they both understood the power of online fan community before they were the titans of their own. they get it, they get us <3
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starberry-cupcake · 2 days ago
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oooohhhh boyyyyyyyy Stuff Happened you folks, this might be obnoxious because there was a lot of exposition, let's hope I can keep it decent. As always, sending you all positive vibes in these trying times ♥
previously, in harrowcita del 9:
this happened
CHAPTER 50
30 minutes for emperor destruction, prepare the champagne
gideon is being taken by yandere twin to meet doctor reverend emperor john
she isn't very into that idea, but doesn't have much of a choice
doctor reverend emperor john is having a very important conversation with someone in the room, so gideon and yandere twin hide to listen in
and the conversation is with non other than not!dulcinea
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not!dulcinea is being possessed
by commander wake
I ASKED FOR THIS IN THE PREVIOUS ONE
why did you need harrow, then, you dramatic asshat?
so, basically, commander wake's name is actually a couple quotes and lyrics to eminem's song from 8 mile
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her name isn't amanda, it's just awake, etc.
I'd take amanda over eminem but ok
they said they are words that date back thousands of years, so we're in the future
I considered this, but not due to book reasons, just because one time I was talking to @lady-harrowhark about one time a barbie of mine was stolen when I was a kid and it somehow related to tlt, this was A Long Time Ago but I thought "what, are the books in the future?"
I have no idea if my hollywood hair barbie had anything to do with the books directly or if it was just some fandom thing @lady-harrowhark knows and I don't, but that planted the idea in my head
if it's a spoiler, don't tell me
but I didn't pick up any clues from the book until eminem
emperor's last name is gaius, which I knew from an untagged non context dashboard post
doctor reverend emperor john gaius wants to know what commander wake was doing in the ninth, because she landed there on purpose
and also is impressed that she's been a revenant for nearly 20 years and doesn't know how she got there
I think it's the sword
so, in come augustine and mercygirl
because now we're having a party
dr reverend emperor john says "Am I in trouble?" because he's the most punchable asshole in the known universe
and introduces commander wake with an evanescence quote rather than an eminem quote
yes, ok, I much prefer that, thank you
thank you, Fallen by Evanescence (2003) you changed my life
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so, turns out that commander wake was in cahoots with these two lyctors
but things turned south and gideon the first was sent to kill her
she went to the ninth to break into the tomb
it always comes down to the tomb
ice cube barbie is very popular
so, I was right when I said that gideon wasn't conceived Traditionally
the eggs were my clue on that bit, the eggs on the notes
they were supposed to 1) use dr reverend emperor john's genes to 2) create a baby with his blood to 3) break the blood ward to 4) open the tomb
CONVOLUTED LYCTOR PLANS
but the eggs didn't work, so commander wake decided to birth gideon herself
when I said gideon was a demigod and used hercules memes and when I compared her to superman or whatever
I was more correct than I thought
commander wake called gideon "bomb"
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this song could go into the gideon playlist @lady-harrowhark and I were talking about
because we didn't have enough lyctors at this party, in comes gideon the first
from battling the beast, which is what everyone was supposed to be doing, btw, just putting that out there
gideon the first will receive a lot of very clever, funny and amazing nicknames by gideon that I can't even remotely compete with
I vow to you and your prowess for nicknames, queen
gideon the first comes in, removes gideon's glasses from harrow's body, and slides them on his face
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commander wake me up before you go go looks at him with heart eyes
and he shoots her
gideon, things were so much easier when you didn't have a family, girl
this is too stressful
everyone is surprised that gideon the first fought the beast, the beast ran and gideon the first is alive
I am NOT SURPRISED because HE WAS FIGHTING ALONGSIDE MATI NONIUS
and ortus, and protozoa, and martita
BUT, MOST IMPORTANTLY, MATI NONIUS
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well done team harrow!!!
so, basically, gideon the first didn't say anything about the whole commander wake situation because he thought gideon was his
which accounts for my doubts the other recap on how I thought gideon wasn't Conceived Traditionally but there were doubts from gideon the first's side
gideon prime, gideon zero, gideon senior (all gideon jokes, not mine) says he was with her for about two years
so augustine starts explaining how they got dr reverend emperor john's genetic material through god apate major
WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED
IT'S ALWAYS THE ORGIES, ISN'T IT?
man, I'd rather not know the details, thank you
gideon the first also doesn't want to know the details
the emperor's bolthole wasn't as inexorable as it was advertised to be, turns out
it's basically a revolving door
ANYWAY
the emperor goes "so you killed her and the baby, right?"
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IN COMES GIDEON, INTRODUCING HERSELF
"I'm not fucking dead"
and the emperor goes "hi, not fucking dead, I'm dad"
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CHAPTER 51
gideon starts remembering childhood things like suffering and fighting with harrow and telling harrow that maybe she is the daughter of someone important and they don't know it
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"You remember how the fuck-off great aunts always used to say, suffer and learn? If they were right, Nonagesimus, how much more can we take until you and me achieve omniscience?"
man, this is rough
so, the thing about the eyes
gideon apparently has AL's eyes
whose name isn't only Annabel Lee
it's also Alecto
the alecto everyone keeps mentioning in the fandom
so, this explains why seeing gideon's eyes was like seeing a ghost to these lyctors
also why ice cube barbie had gideon's eyes
THERE ARE A LOT OF THREADS GOING ON IN THIS BOARD
GIDEON IS CONNECTED TO A LOT OF PEOPLE
NONE OF THEM GOOD
the lyctors bring back what teacher said in canaan au, about them asking dr reverend emperor john to kill AL aka Annabel Lee aka Alecto aka ice cube barbie
apparently all of them (except for gideon the first) hated her and were low key scared of her and high key scared of what might happen with her around
they think the beasts are coming partly because of her
and whatever dr reverend emperor john did to resurrect her
the emperor says he didn't kill her, he "switched her off"
not successfully, because she's been sort of roaming around
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mercygirl and augustine say that everything about this is very sus because what if he didn't kill AL??? and what is going on with the origin of his power???
dr reverend emperor john goes "you both do tend to go overboard on the foreplay"
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mercygirl and augustine figured out that harrow's true cavalier had AL's eyes
but it was impossible for a baby to be born with AL's genes
however, it was very probable that a baby had been born in the ninth with the emperor's genes
because they had been planning on that to happen
albeit in a different way, without the human intervention
so, if gideon has AL's eyes but the emperor's genes
it means AL's eyes aren't hers and the emperor's aren't his
the emperor's weird eyes are AL's and gideon's eyes are the emperor's
because.......
he achieved lyctorhood without having to slurp his cavalier aka AL
I'm very interested in this potential situation if we get gideon alive again
but everyone else is pissed off because they had to slurp their cavaliers unnecessarily
yandere twin also decides to join the chat after this
and, apparently, anastasia had figured it out too
the ninth necro who everyone said was the one who couldn't become a lyctor
the one with a room unused
until harrow
the emperor's version of events is that things went off the rails in the process and he had to kill them both
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augustine tells dr reverend emperor john to just stop already with his plan of destroying everything
and the emperor says that the man before his resurrection would have hated him to say that
mercygirl then goes "I'll forgive you if you tell me you didn't mean to kill my cav"
and the emperor goes "yes, I'll do whatever"
so he hugs mercygirl
and mercygirl
FUCKING DECIMATES HIM
SHE WRECKS HIM
SHE MELTS HIM INTO NOTHINGNESS
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gideon says she's an orphan again while I'm giving everyone a party hat and a piece of celebratory cake
I'M SORRY THIS WAS LONG but we're reaching the end of this book!!! See you next time!!!
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jillsandwhichs · 2 days ago
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Joel Miller x Reader Smutshot Collection , Chap 6 , Beer and Sex
Masterlist
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Pairing: F!Reader x Joel Miller
Summary: You, Joel and Tommy are at an event in Austin that includes being outdoors, drinking & games! Well, long story short, you and Joel end up heading back to his place for some indoor fun
Status of your guy's relationship in this one shot: Friends
WC: 3.0k
Type: NSFW
Warnings: No outbreak (AU), Usage of alcohol, Buzzed sex, Dirty talk, Making out, Breast play, Living room sex, You ride Joel, Unprotected sex, Choking kink, Clit rubbing, Denial of orgasm, doggy style & you ride him
A/n: Hi! Hope you all enjoy. Please check out my masterlist, there's a lot of stuff there. You can get to know me, you can see the rules of my blog and then you can see all of my fanfictions. You'll be able to find the previous chapters to this fic and upcoming ones. You'll also be able to find my Wattpad & AO3. Comments, reblogs & likes are appreciated. Thank you
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You sat back down whilst laughing. Picking your beer back up, you sipped it and put it back down. You haven't drinken in a while, it's nice to finally do it again. You're usually so busy with work that you never have the time or energy to get some alcohol in your system. Your friends Joel and Tommy convinced you to go with them to this event in town though and when you saw there were drinks, you couldn't refuse.
The only reason Joel and Tommy are here is because Maria is hosting this event. She's very big with the city council and hosts events like this from time to time. You don't mind coming. You're actually enjoying yourself. Just a bit ago you were playing darts with Joel and then tether ball with Tommy. You're slightly buzzed too. You can't get full blown drunk though, you need to still drive home.
As you watched some of the younglings run around and play, you felt the weight of the table increase as Joel sat down. It's a muscular man. He weighs a good bit. "Hey." You said in a friendly tone. "Hello." He replied, sipping his tall boy. "You got another one? Shit, don't make me go get another one too, I still have to drive home." You joked, resting your head in your hand. Joel chuckled. "My house is just a few blocks away and I walked here so I ain't even bothered." Joel stated.
That's right, he lives in the suburbs. That's not something you'd expect from a country boy like him. Then again, being country is defined by where you live. "Where did Tommy and Maria go?" "No fuckin' clue," Joel snickered, "Probably fuckin' in the bathroom or something." He teased. You laughed and nodded. "They are newly weds, what can you expect?" You said whilst giggling. Joel nodded. "True that."
Joel was once married, he even had a daughter with the woman. Joel has been single for years now though. Everyone jokes he's out of commission but he just says he's waiting for the right lady. Sarah, his daughter, is almost twelve. She's getting older and cuter by the second. You've met her quite a bit, even babysat her, she's a dear. Joel told you she's with her mother right now, so he's free.
"At least Maria is getting some. It's been a good few months for me." "Months? Try years darlin' and it ain't by choice." You cackled at his words. He isn't wrong. He's celibate from what you've heard. "Sorry Joel, that has to suck." "It sure fuckin' does." He took a shot of his beer. You nodded and sipped off of yours too. The beer was getting warm. Gross. You sighed deeply. "I'm going to go get a new beer, I'll be right back."
You stood up and headed towards the cooler. This cooler was brought by Tommy himself. He decided to provide it for everyone. It's the good stuff too. You bent over and picked up a new one. It was ice cold to the touch. "Hell yeah." You murmured, cracking it open. You're currently wearing a black tank top and short jean shorts. It's hot during the summer, you have to stay cool somehow.
When you turned around, you saw that Joel's eyes were on you. He looked like he was trying to play it off as if he wasn't just checking you out but he totally was. You can't lie, you've checked him out too. Those big muscles and that handsome face are a sight for sore eyes. He's a hottie, admittedly. You giggled and sat back down beside him.
"You were totally just checking me out, weren't you?" You said with a laugh, tipping your beer into your mouth and drinking it all while looking into his brown eyes. He snorted and nodded. "You caught me." Oh, so he was? You don't mind. You knew Joel would be there and that did somewhat take part in what you're currently wearing.
You've always thought he was sexy. The day Tommy introduced you to him you though that. That was only two years ago. Your guy's friendship has been great but you're awfully surprised the two of you haven't hooked up yet. You've definitely flirted and hit on one another. You've even went as far as to having him lick salt off of your stomach before taking a shot of tequila and that had you soaked.
It is very surprising.
"But you can't deny you were checkin' me out earlier." Joel whispered to you with a husky voice. You giggled. "Guilty as charged. You've also caught me red handed." This isn't just the beer talking. You totally were. When he was putting the cooler down earlier, you were indeed gawking at his veiny, buff arms. You giggled and bit your lip while looking up at him. "How drunk are you?" You asked him. "Not drunk enough." You rolled your eyes at his words.
You looked around the area. You still have no clue where Tommy and Maria are. "I'll shoot him a text. Let's get out of here." He whispered to you. You scoffed and breathed in deeply. "Alright." You giggled. He got off of the picnic table and took your hand in his, helping you out of the table as well. You smiled at him. Your guy's hands stayed interlocked. Is this actually going to happen? Are you going to fuck Joel Miller? After all this time?
"My house ain't too far from here." Joel said to you in a deep voice. "I know." You smiled, walking alongside him. You don't feel drunk. You do feel buzzed. It isn't anything you can't handle. You're a heavy weight. It takes you time to really hit the drunk point. The trees around you and Joel brought you two shade, but you're already too hot, in more ways than one. He looked down at you and chuckled. "I can't wait to fuck you." He admitted. You huffed out. "Good." You bit your lip to hold back a big grin.
You glanced over your shoulder. You hope no one will wonder where you two are. You'd rather keep this between you and Joel for now. "Will we come back once we're done?" "We'll have to, I left my goddamn brother back there." You laughed loudly. "That is true... He'll be fine, right?" "He's a grown man, he's fine. Like I said darlin', I'll text him." You nodded. You just don't want them to come looking for the two of you.
You'd rather not be in the middle of getting fucked when Tommy and Maria show up.
-
As Joel opened his front door and locked it behind him, he chuckled and grabbed you, smashing his lips against yours. You kissed him back. His messy beard scraped against your face. "Mmph." You moaned, wrapping your arms around his neck. He picked you up into his arms like you were a feather. You giggled and continued to kiss him. His hands were on your ass cheeks, squeezing them as he took you two to the living room area.
"Baby?" "Hmm?" "Bedroom or living room?" You snorted at his question. At least you get a say in this. You thought for a moment. "Let's keep it fun-living room." "Glady." Joel smirked, kissing you again but this time, his tongue found it's way into your mouth. You didn't mind. It made you even more horny. Your guy's tongues fought for dominance. You wanted to explore every crevice of his mouth. You moaned loudly as he sat you down on him. You could feel his erection through his stained work jeans.
You giggled and kissed him before reaching your hands down to the end of your tank top and pulling it off. Joel just stared in admiration. He thinks you're gorgeous. "Look at you," He purred, "You're beautiful." He whispered. You grinned. "You're handsome, and so sexy." You spoke seductively before licking his lower lip and kissing him again. His hands went to your tits, he squeezed them gently. Joel is more of an ass guy though.
After making out for a little bit, Joel finally pulled away to take deep breaths. "I'm fuckin' twitchin'." He sighed deeply, looking down at his bulge. You think that's the sexist thing ever. You love when a man is vocal about how he feels or what you're doing to him. "I'm so wet for you, wanna feel?" You whispered against his ear. Joel's breath shuttered. "Badly." And his hands went to your shorts, undoing them and helping you out of them as well.
Stepping out of your shorts, you climbed back into Joel's lap and sighed. "Feel." You whispered, kissing his neck and jawline. Joel brought his finger down to your core and pulled your panties to the side. As he dipped his fingers through your folds, he let out a low groan. "So fuckin' wet, just for me, hm?" He whispered, nibbling on your jawline. You giggled. "Just for you." This surely isn't the first time you've gotten wet thinking about Mr. Joel Miller.
Joel swiped his fingers through your folds, picking up all of your juicy wetness. You continued to kiss him. He seemed desperate, like a wild animal. He's hungry for you. You bit his lower lip and once again swiped your tongue along his. You moaned so quietly, it was more of a whimper.
He pulled his finger away and grunted. "Need to feel you from the inside." He murmured as he pulled his cock out of his jeans. Oh yeah, he's big. You're excited. It's been so long, especially for him. You hope you're as good as he'll be to you. Grabbing his member, you yourself pulled your white panties to the side before you then sat down on his dick. Both of you made sensual noises as your folds and cunt enveloped him. He was already so deep inside of you. It feels so good.
"How's that?" You chuckled, your arms around his neck. He snickered and gripped your ass tightly, landing a smack onto it which caused you to jolt slightly. "You feel so good. Now fuckin' ride me." He began to squeeze and slap your ass and you started to ride him. You went slow at first. Your movements were just simple grinds back and forth but you'd occasionally lift your ass up and back down, literally bouncing on his cock.
You wanted to savour this. You haven't felt this good in awhile. Having sex with Joel tonight was not on your agenda of plans but seriously, it is a welcomed surprise. He feels amazing. He knows what he's doing too. Each time he pinches your ass cheeks or spanks you playfully, it either makes you moan or kiss him even harder and more passionately.
Now, Joel is holding your hips. You began to ride him faster too. His dick is so deep inside of you, you can hardly believe it. "I've wanted this for a long time." You moaned out, looking him in the eyes. His eyes got darker and even more full of lust. "Me too babygirl, me too." He then swatted your ass again before going back to squeezing your hips. You're sure you'll have red marks all over your cheeks by later in the evening.
Bouncing on him, each thrust was just a mark bringing you closer to your climax. His member is deep inside of you and is shoving itself against your tight walls with each movement. "Yes baby." He groaned, kissing and licking your neck. He thinks you smell amazing. You did put on your perfume before going to the event. You're glad it's doing it's job.
"Babygirl, turn around, cowgirl, y'know?" You giggled at his words. "Yes sir." You teased and lifted yourself off of him slightly to turn around. You were surprised he asked you to switch positions, but you aren't complaining. You pushed yourself down onto his dick again and you both made whimpering noises. He seems to be feeling good. That's all you want. It's been years for him, you better make it good.
Once you got comfortable, you moaned loudly as he started to thrust up into you. "Joel!" You practically screamed, tossing your head back against his broad shoulder. He cackled and kissed your neck, leaving numerous bites and hickies onto it too. How are you supposed to go into work on Monday? You're sure these'll last a few days, hopefully not. "Need to make sure I still got it." Joel grunted, now he is the one fucking you and man, it's heaven.
Joel noticed your head was still tilted back against his shoulder. He smirked. He brought his left hand up to your neck and held it, choking you now. You moaned and turned your head slightly, kissing his messy hair and giggling. "You're so deep inside of me." You panted. "Yea? You're takin' it so fuckin' well too baby." Joel replied, kissing your cheeks numerous times, making you smile and chuckle.
His free hand, his right one, was one your lower stomach, holding you in place. You wanted to look down to see him moving inside of you, but you couldn't. With his hand on your neck, there's not much you can do with your head. You aren't complaining. You think it's hot to be choked. He does it so well too. "Been thinkin' about fuckin' you for awhile now," He whispered against your ear. His breath was warm. "You feel better than I ever could've imagined." That made you whimper in pleasure.
You felt his right hand slither down from your waist and to your clit. You whimpered. "Oh God!" You whined out as he began to rub your clit fast and with pressure. It felt so good. He works well with his fingers. He continued to thrust up into you, which made the experience a million times better. "I'm gonna cum." You whispered to him. "No baby, not yet, hold it in." What!? How are you supposed to just hold it in? "What?" "You heard me babydoll." He licked behind your ear and bit on your lobe. "Do not cum yet." He sternly stated.
"How?" "Just do it."
How are you supposed to hold back your orgasm? No hookup has ever asked you to hold it back. Actually, they need you to cum quickly or else they'll finish before you. You whimpered and bit your lip. No, you're going to cum. "I can't," You panted, "I just can't." Joel didn't respond. "Joel!" You moaned out, reaching your hand behind his head and tugging on his hair. He grunted and bit down on your neck.
"Cum for me."
That was it. You moaned softly as you coated his cock in your fluids. You let go of his hair. Shaking in his lap, Joel continued to rub your clit until you came down from your high. It overstimed you even. "Holy Christ." You moaned. You went to turn your head to kiss him but he lifted you up and chuckled. "I still haven't finished." He then pushed you down onto the couch, doggy style, and began to pound into you.
You moaned loudly and gripped the couch beneath you. Your knuckles even went white. He moved so skillfully inside of you. Each pump was one of excellence. "Wish I could cum inside of you." He whispered, running his hands up and down your back before he ultimately rested them on your rear. Joel gripped your ass, squeezing it tightly before leaving multiple slaps onto it, all of which made your moan or squeal.
With just a couple more thrusts, Joel finished. He quickly pulled out and stroked himself. He finished all over your ass and lower back. "Fuck sakes." Joel groaned, caressing your ass as he came. You pushed your ass against his manhood and giggled. He spanked you again and snickered. "One sec." He leaned over and grabbed a random wipe, cleaning your ass and back off. He tossed the rag to the other side of the living room and you chuckled.
Joel heaved deeply and lifted you up by your waist and pulled you back into his lap. You were basically completely naked, only in panties whereas he was fully dressed. So unfair. "Was it good?" You asked him, resting your head against the arm of the couch. He glanced down at you, still breathing heavily. "You're a funny girl." He leaned down and kissed you softly. "It was fuckin' glorious." He then nibbed on your jawline, making you giggle cutely.
You hummed and looked up at him. "You're the only man whose ever denied me of finishing, by the way." You snorted. "That's because you've only done slept with boys who finish too quickly. I think it's sexy to see a woman be restricted of her pleasure." You giggled at his words. "It felt better." "That's the point babydoll." He caressed your cheek and you brought yourself closer to his face, kissing him gently.
He breathed in deeply and cupped your face firmly, holding you in place. "Don't convince me to fuck you again." He said with a smile against your lips. "If you can't handle it..." You bit your lip. You acted like you were about to get off of his lap and you suddenly squealed as he tossed you back onto the couch and put you in missionary. Your legs went over his shoulders and you smiled.
"Oh I think I can handle it."
That was where the next of many rounds began.
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keepingitformyself · 8 hours ago
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there’s been no way for me to say (that i felt a certain way)
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Synopsis: natasha romanoff has loved you for ages and she could never seem to get it right.
pairings: natasha romanoff x reader
genre: college AU, fluff and angst.
warnings: angst?
please do not repost my work anywhere for any reason at all. if you do see this happen to any of my stories, please let me know. thank you x.
natasha met you in a very peculiar way.
it started at a friends of a friends party, in some internet starlet’s brooklyn loft.
drinks were going around, the music was loud, the smell of marijuana was very strong. she doesn’t quite remember it— after having been to a bunch of parties they all seem to blur into one— but she knows it was enough to leave a lasting impression on her.
she’d heard your piercing laugh from across the room. you, in a tight tank top and some black slacks. she could see the shine of sweat against your skin, the colorful lighting of the room making you seem so beautifully human.
everything sort of froze in the coming moments. she watched as you took your top off without a second thought. you were about to shotgun a beer and you stood tall as you did it atop the kitchen island. you didn’t need the attention, nor did you want it, but you had it.
it was a simple behavior. but it stayed with natasha long after you had crushed the beer can and tossed it on the floor somewhere.
natasha thinks you never notice her staring for the rest of the night but you do.
weeks later she sees you again at another party.
clint, wanda, tony and everyone else joins her this time. she isn’t surprised when she sees you. it was the same crowd, similar friend groups. but this time you made it easy for her to approach you.
somehow you end standing next to eachother near where all the drinks had been laid out.
"hey," you said, voice casual but warm. "didn’t expect to see you here again."
natasha smiled, though she hadn’t expected to talk to you at all. nor did she think you noticed her. "i guess we have similar taste in parties."
you laughed lightly. “guess so."
there was a beat of silence before you added, “you know, you were kinda staring at me last time.”
natasha froze for a second, unsure how to respond. she hadn’t thought you’d noticed. but before she could stammer out an excuse, you were already grinning.
“i’m just messing with you. it was funny. i didn’t think anyone would care enough to notice me.”
natasha was relieved, yet still unsure if you were actually joking. either way she felt this was going better than she planned.
the night wore on and you guys carried easy conversation. natasha was still unsure how to even approach talking to you. she felt kind of shy. so she improvised by making references to things she didn’t think you’d get, but you almost always did.
you dropped a reference to something obscure, a movie natasha had once obsessed over, and natasha stared at you for a moment longer than was socially acceptable. she couldn’t stop herself.
“you’re really into that, huh?” she said, and just like that, the bond started to form. it wasn’t immediate or instant, not the kind of connection that screams “best friends forever.” no, it was something stranger, something subtler, like two different puzzle pieces that had almost fit, only to get pushed back together by sheer happenstance.
“your references are spot on.” you laughed. natasha smiled at how easy you made it for her to be around you.
you and natasha started seeing each other more, slowly building this weird, unspoken routine. she’d text you at random, making some kind of sarcastic comment or joke only you would get, and you’d shoot back a meme that only someone with your specific sense of humor would understand. over time, you both ended up in the same circles, passing each other in the hallways of the university, at class, at parties—always just a little bit more than acquaintances, but never quite crossing into the territory of “best friends.”
there was something comfortable about it. easy, even. but for natasha, it was also strange. the more she saw you, the more she felt like there was something else there, something neither of you wanted to acknowledge. maybe it was a crush. maybe it was more than that.
it wasn’t as though either of you had been completely oblivious to the passing of time, to the fact that you were both growing older, moving through college with the same bittersweetness that everyone else felt. and yet, there was still this distance between you, an unspoken barrier that neither of you had broken down.
natasha thought about you a lot more than she’d like to admit. how she so badly wanted to cross the line between friendship and something more.
by senior year, natasha couldn’t ignore it anymore. her feelings for you weren’t just fleeting glances or passing thoughts. they were there, constant, sitting beneath her skin, running through her mind like a song she couldn’t shake. but it wasn’t just a crush. it was more. she could feel it. she knew it.
the desperation kept getting worse.
it was a slow burn.
you were months set from graduating, natasha felt it was time she’d try to test her luck.
it was late into the evening at yet another party—music blaring, laughter echoing through the crowded living room, and cups of cheap beer littering the tables. one last semester before graduation, before the "real world" set in. natasha was sitting on the couch, leaning against the back with her legs stretched out in front of her. her eyes roamed the room, scanning for someone to talk to. and then she saw you.
you were in the middle of a conversation with clint and wanda, your hands animatedly gesturing as you told some wild story about a disastrous trip to the beach, the kind of tale that had everyone in stitches. natasha couldn’t help but smile from across the room. there was something magnetic about you—how you lived so fully, how you pulled everyone into your orbit without even trying. natasha had been watching you for months now, always on the edge of your space, always wishing she could be more than just a silent observer.
she didn’t know when it started—when the simple admiration had turned into something else. but now, as she watched you laugh with your friends, something in her chest tightened. this wasn’t a crush she could just ignore.
it wasn’t the first time natasha had thought about asking you out. but tonight felt different. maybe it was the proximity of graduation, the sudden realization that this was it—that you both were on the brink of leaving behind this chaotic, unmoored time in your lives. she could either stay on the sidelines or take the chance.
she stood up, smoothing out her jacket and walking across the room. her friends—clint, wanda, and sam—noticed her approaching and exchanged knowing glances, all but daring her to make a move. natasha could feel the weight of their stares, but she ignored them. she focused only on you.
"hey," she said, stepping into the conversation, a little breathless from the nerves she’d kept hidden.
you turned, giving her that warm smile you always did. "hey, nat! what’s up?"
"not much, just wanted to, uh, ask you something," natasha began, her usual confidence faltering just a little.
“i was thinking about heading to this bar later, just to get away from all… this,” she gestured vaguely to the party around them, “and i was wondering if you wanted to join me? for drinks. just us. you know, before we all get caught up in the whole graduation mess.”
it was casual, maybe too casual. but natasha didn’t want to make it seem like a big deal. not with everyone watching.
there was a pause, just a beat too long, before you looked at her, a faint frown pulling at your brow. you were processing. “uh,” you hesitated, glancing at your friends.
clint, wanda, and sam all turned their heads at the same time, giving you the slightest raise of their brows. you bit your lip, clearly unsure, and natasha’s heart sank a little at the hesitation.
"i mean," you said slowly, looking back at natasha. "we’re friends, nat. i just… i’m not sure."
it was a gentle rejection, but it stung all the same. natasha swallowed, masking her disappointment with a shrug. "no, yeah, of course. no pressure." she let out a quiet laugh, her hand rubbing the back of her neck, trying to laugh it off. "i was just messing with you. don't worry about it."
you nodded, a small, apologetic smile on your lips. "i mean, i’d love to hang out more, just—"
"totally fine," natasha interrupted, her voice light but edged with something that made her own heart ache. she smiled, keeping it neutral. "maybe some other time."
she turned away quickly, but she felt your eyes on her as she walked back to the couch, her friends watching the entire scene unfold. clint raised his brows, and natasha just shook her head, not wanting to give them the satisfaction of knowing how deeply that small exchange had affected her.
but inside, it stung. it stung more than she cared to admit. it wasn’t just a small rejection. it was the fear that maybe you had noticed her feelings all along and were just too scared to say anything about it.
that night, natasha tried to sleep, but her thoughts wouldn’t stop racing. you were everything she had wanted, but in this strange, liminal space, neither of you had been brave enough to admit it.
weeks passed, the semester came to an end, and graduation day loomed on the horizon. natasha and you both moved on in your own ways, starting to make plans for life after college. but something lingered. something unsaid. life became a little more faster, and faces got a little older.
you reached out to her a few times. it was never the same as before. it was different now, with this strange tension lingering between you both. but you kept in touch, as if you both were afraid of letting go of something that might have been, something that might have still been.
and maybe it was ridiculous, natasha thought, but she was okay with it. she had loved you for years, and maybe that was the most honest thing she could admit to herself.
because even if you two had never been the closest of people, you’d always been there. always in the background, always in between. and somehow, that was enough for natasha. enough for her to hold on to the hope that maybe, one day, you’d both be able to finally figure it out.
it had been two years since you both left the university. two years where natasha had started a career in marketing, constantly moving up, climbing the corporate ladder while trying (and failing) to suppress the things she didn’t want to feel about you. she had dated, of course. a couple of short-term relationships, nothing serious. but nothing had ever lasted, and she had never quite understood why until now. the answer had always been there, hovering just out of reach, in the form of a text, a call, a passing thought about you.
as for you, you’d moved across the country for a job in graphic design. you didn’t think much about natasha at first. life had been busy—new city, new friends, new routine—but every now and then, you'd wonder if she'd thought of you. if she remembered how everything had felt when you were both on the brink of something, but never quite dared to cross the line.
and then it happened.
it wasn’t planned. it wasn’t expected. but one saturday evening, natasha found herself sitting at a bar in brooklyn after a long week at work. she’d had a rough day. one of those days where everything felt like too much. and then, as she nursed her gin and tonic, she heard someone call her name.
it was a voice she hadn’t heard in what felt like forever.
“natasha?”
she turned, already recognizing the voice before she even saw your face. and there you were, standing in the doorway of the bar like a memory coming to life. your hair had grown a little longer, and you looked different, older in a way that made Natasha’s heart skip a beat. but you were still you—the same you who had been in those parties, those late-night study sessions, the one who had always made her laugh with a look or a passing reference.
for a moment, neither of you said anything. just stood there, eyes locking, as if trying to figure out whether this was real.
“i didn’t know you were in new york,” natasha said, her voice betraying the sudden weight in her chest. she couldn’t keep the smile from forming, even though she tried.
“i wasn’t planning on being,” you said, grinning. “work sent me here for a few weeks. i was meeting some friends, but it’s been a while, so i thought i’d just see if you were around.”
it wasn’t exactly casual. but you both knew it wasn’t entirely random, either. it felt like fate had decided that you two were finally going to do this.
you sat down, and the conversation flowed as naturally as it always had. the awkwardness of the past melted away. you didn’t need to pretend anymore. there were no more games, no more hesitations.
just you and natasha, picking up where you left off, though this time, the space between you felt a little different. there was an understanding now, a quiet knowing in the way you both spoke, a recognition that time had done its job.
“so…how’s life?” natasha asked, pushing her drink aside and leaning in a little closer.
you shrugged, but there was something different about you too, something less guarded. “it’s been alright. busy. but you know how that goes. i’ve been thinking about home, though. about—” you paused, then looked directly at natasha. “about people i should have kept in touch with.”
natasha’s heart was thudding in her chest, but she kept it together. she was a master of hiding emotions, after all. “yeah?” she asked, her voice softer now.
“yeah,” you said, with a smile that made natasha’s stomach flutter. “it’s funny how things work out. you don’t realize what you miss until you’re standing in front of it again.”
time had always been a strange thing between natasha and you—something both distant and close at the same time, like a thread that wound its way through your lives, never quite snapping, always lingering. you’d known each other for years, seen each other at parties, shared quiet moments, and laughed at the same jokes. but all that time, there had always been a hesitation. a space between the two of you, filled with something—something both of you had been aware of but had never dared to name.
it was the kind of thing that was easier to ignore in college, easier to pretend it wasn’t there while you were both busy with classes, with your lives, with the thrill of being young and not yet knowing what you wanted out of the world.
but that something between you had always been there, pulling at both of you, quiet but undeniable. the way you caught each other’s eyes a little too long. the way your conversations turned into something more meaningful without either of you intending it. the way natasha would see you at parties and catch her breath for just a moment. the way you’d smile, as if you both knew, but neither of you was brave enough to act on it.
you’d both dated people. tried relationships. but it had never lasted, had it? there was always that nagging feeling in the back of your mind—something missing, something not quite right. as if your lives couldn’t fit together because they weren’t ready to yet. you didn’t have the words for it, and neither did natasha. but you both knew. you always knew.
the things that had once seemed complicated—life, timing, fear—suddenly didn’t feel as big as they once had. there was a quiet honesty between you now, as if you both had grown enough to stop pretending you didn’t feel it. the awkwardness, the hesitation, the “maybe” that had been there before was gone.
it was you. it had always been you. and you knew it too.
“so,” natasha said after a beat, her voice softer now, quieter than before. “what are we doing here, really? we’re not strangers. we’ve known each other for, what, almost four years now?”
you looked at her, your lips curling into a smile that didn’t hide the tension in your gaze. “we’ve known each other longer than that,” you said. “we’ve always known.”
“i think i’ve always been afraid of this,” natasha admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “afraid that i’d say the wrong thing, or that it would mess things up between us. that maybe the timing was never going to be right.”
you nodded slowly. “i’ve been afraid of that too.” you paused, then added with a wry smile, “i was never good with timing.”
“maybe we don’t need perfect timing,” natasha said softly, her gaze meeting yours with something she hadn’t let herself feel before—a quiet certainty. “maybe it’s just the right time now. after all this time.”
you didn’t answer right away. you didn’t have to. instead, you reached across the bar, your hand brushing gently against hers, and just like that, it all clicked. there was no more hesitation. no more waiting. you both knew what this was, what it always had been.
“yeah,” you said, your voice low and certain. “i think you’re right.”
and that was it.
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dazzlerwriting · 3 days ago
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call me & i’ll come
robert ‘bob’ floyd x singer!reader
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Pictures are not mine, credit to pinterest!
3.5k words
summary: inspired by “Watermelon” by Jane + John Q Public. after bob joins a D&D campaign to make friends in San Diego, he gets talked into also joining the band that is formed within the group. Over time he and the lead singer slowly get closer and closer. What happens when they kiss, but don’t talk about what the kiss meant to them?
warnings: slight miscommunication! fluff fluff fluff. a bit angsty at one point. the end gets a bit heated so 18+ MDNI!!!! Reader uses she/her pronouns, but theres no other descriptors! petname “darlin” is used twice. use of y/n (i tried so hard not to lol) flashback is bold and italicized
authors note: first off, thank you @lewmagoo for posting about drummer rhett, which in turn helped inspire this story! & everyone posting their Atta Boy stuff was also a huge inspiration to this!! only my second fic and i wrote so much. i just kept going and didnt stop until it was finished! im so sorry lmao. but i hope you enjoy!! this is mostly from bob’s pov!
Bob Floyd has a secret. Well, two. The first one is that he plays in a band in his free time, specifically, he plays the drums. Anyone who may watch how Bob acts when he thinks no one is paying attention, they would see him drumming on his lap, on the desk, or on any free surface. But the Dagger Squad isn’t that astute when it comes to their fellow workers lives. Natasha knows but, there’s a certain trust to be had between a pilot & their WSO. So Bob told her, and while she was taken a bit aback that the quiet Bob Floyd played the drums in an actual band, she was supportive.
Now, the secret that not even Natasha knows, the one Bob would swear he would take to his grave, is that he has a crush on the lead singer in their band. It's not just a silly crush that would go away with time; no, this crush has stuck since he first met her at a community D&D meetup.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Flashback
He saw a sign that read “New Dungeons and Dragons campaign, starting Wednesday! All leveled players welcomed!” on the board at the grocery store a week after being stationed in San Diego. He decided he needed a creative outlet after work and maybe to make friends that weren’t pilots. So he went, and that’s when he saw her. She was their Game Master and she was wearing a renaissance faire-esque outfit. From that first sighting, he was a goner. He would look at her theatrical storytelling during their sessions with a fondness that rivaled the way Orpheus looked at Euridyce. Quickly he would look away before she caught him, but if he had kept looking, he would have noticed her looking at him the same way.
Somewhere along the way, another member of the party, named Blake, noticed Bob drumming on his thigh when the game would die down for a bit. They suggested Bob joined their band, seeing as they were in desperate need of a new drummer, the last one leaving to hit it big time. He went on a whole spill about everything having to do with the band and Bob was apprehensive at first, performing was way out of his comfort zone. He wasn’t like Rooster, he didn’t think he had the proper stage presence to perform for a crowd, and he didn’t want to make a fool of himself.
But that’s when she walked over to the two, a smirk on her face as she looked at Blake and said “Blake… go easy on Bobby boy here. I’m sure he doesn’t need a whole infomercial on why he should join us.” She turned to Bob and put her hand on his arm, and for a second he was sure his brain short-circuited. Now with a soft smile on her face, she gently said “Bob we would love for you to join us, only if you’re comfortable. I know you could be called away at a second’s notice, but regardless it would be an honor to have you as our drummer.” He sat there for a second just taking her in, from the casual way she was dressed, to her kind demeanor. He realized at that moment he was royally fucked because he would do anything she asked. He looked her in the eyes and responded “I-I’ll do it,” stuttering a bit but getting through it. Her smile widened, her eyes lit up with what Bob thought could be adoration, and she jumped up a bit clapping, “Great! We rehearse every Saturday, usually, gigs are small just hangouts for friends or family! I’ll text you all the details.” He missed the warmth from her hand as soon as it was gone but her reaction was worth it. That night while Bob was getting ready to sleep, his phone lit up with a text.
Y/N: Thank you for agreeing to this Bob, it truly means a lot. I’m glad you decided to come to our session that first night :)
And after replying, he fell asleep with a grin on his face, not regretting his decision one bit.
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Now after a few months, Bob and the rest of the members have gotten close. They hang out outside of rehearsal and game sessions, and they’ve even been to Bob’s apartment for dinner. That’s when he told Natasha that he was in a band, and introduced them to her. They had a great night and Bob felt like he had found his group of people. The thought of leaving them for a mission, where the outcome was unknown, was scary, but the idea of having them all there to come back to, outweighed the formidable thoughts. Especially when he thought about the kind, charming, and beautiful singer who made it her mission to text Bob every day to ensure he was having a good day. Over the few months they had learned a lot about each other, she made sure to ask him the same questions he would ask her. Including dreams, they had as kids, favorite movies, biggest music inspirations, etc. He opened up to her about the constant teasing from the Dagger Squad, including the “Baby on Board” joke. And he learned she was the biggest nerd outside of D&D, texting him updates on the latest comic she had read, the newest Doctor Who update, and random fun facts about his favorite movies. With every text he received, Bob fell deeper and deeper into Cupid’s chokehold.
It all kinda got turned upside down when he and Phoenix suffered from a Bird Strike during training, and they had to eject. Early morning, after leaving the hospital and getting home, he texted the band group chat to let them know he would be missing both D&D and band practice. He was bombarded with questions regarding his well-being, and texts lending out sympathy to him. But y/n had been quiet, that is until he heard a knock on his door. When he opened it, he saw her standing there with several bags full of groceries and a shy smile on her face. “Hi,” she said softly “I’m sorry for the intrusion but I just wanted to make sure your recovery was a stress-free time, and well, I just, I’m sorry I can drop all this off and go if you want me to. I should’ve texted beforehand and I..” she was rambling now and he thought he couldn’t find her any more endearing than he did right now. He adjusted his glasses and stepped out of the doorway, “N-no come on in, you are welcome here at any time, you know that.” At that, her shoulders dropped a bit in relief and he could see her let out a breath he doubted she knew she was holding in. He led her to the kitchen and watched her get to work doing whatever she was here to do.
“Okay so I have the stuff to make baked potato soup, Alfredo, and I also brought peanuts, chips, Gatorade, and a bunch of other snacks for you.” She quickly got everything out of the bags, putting things in the right place, and Bob was hit with a daydream of this being a normal occurrence. A domestic life with her, both of them dancing around each other in the kitchen, making dinner while dancing to songs like “I’ll Be Seeing You” by Billie Holiday. He was so caught up with his daydream, he didn’t even realize she was talking to him. “I’m sorry what did you say?” He asked with a bashful smile. She shook her head with a gentle laugh, and said “I was just saying you should go get comfortable, I’ll be in here for a while.” He looked at her and gave a soft nod, immediately going to lie down on the couch and continue his daydreaming. For a while, he could hear her gentle hums coming from the kitchen, and he let that lull him into a peaceful sleep where he dreamed of a future where they were together.
A few hours later he was woken up by someone gently shaking his shoulder. He rubbed his eyes, put his glasses on, and when he looked to see who it was, he swore he was still dreaming. She looked almost angelic standing above him with a caring smile and a bowl of something in her hands. “Sorry to wake you, it just hit 4, so I thought you might be hungry,” she gave a soft shrug and looked a bit nervous to see what his reaction might be. He took the bowl from her hands and gave a soft thank you with a smile he hoped was kind, and not some kind of grimace from still being a bit tired. He realized it was baked potato soup and he had to admit it was the best soup he had ever had, “This is amazing, thank you so much.” She gave another shrug and replied “It’s the least I can do, need our best sorcerer and drummer to get better soon! I put the rest in the fridge along with the Alfredo. The snacks are still on your island, but I should get out of your hair now. If you need anything please know I am a call away.” He really didn’t want her to leave just yet so he did something that even shocked him, “Do you want to stay, I’m sure you’re hungry as well and we could watch a movie or something?” Her eyes widened and a bright smile appeared on her face, “I would love to if you really don’t mind.” Of course, he didn’t mind, was she crazy?? If he could he would spend all of his time with her. “I don’t, please you’ve done so much for me today so please stay.” He didn’t mean to sound so needy, but it didn’t seem to deter her. In fact, her smile got brighter and she nodded her head.
They decided on watching Wall-E, it seemed like a good idea at the moment, but now they are both sniffling on the couch. “God who knew a cute robot could turn two adults into an emotional mess?” she said while turning to him, wiping the tears from under her eyes. He looked at her and she was gorgeous he thought. They sat looking in each other’s eyes for a moment and in a flash, their lips were on each other. He doesn’t know who leaned in first, all he knew was her lips were soft and he could feel her breath from her nose. As soon as it started, it was over and he chased her lips when she pulled away. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I’m so- I’m gonna go. Thank you Bob.” she rushed out, quickly grabbed her stuff, and practically ran from his apartment. He sat there dumbfounded, had he messed it up so quickly? Did she not like him in the same way he did her? He didn’t know, he kept wondering what happened while putting things away, and he fell asleep asking himself what happened.
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A few weeks have passed, and things have gone semi-back to normal. There’s an awkward tension between them every session, every band practice, and the texts from her have stopped outside of letting him know of any changes to the schedule. Natasha could tell something was going on with her backseater, but he wouldn’t budge. He just told her it was nothing and that he was fine. But anyone with any common sense could see he wasn’t fine, he was distracted at work, he didn’t have the band members over for dinner, and he just seemed lost in thoughts every time someone talked to him at Hard Deck. But Natasha wasn’t having it, so she contacted Y/N, she told her Bob was acting strange. Y/N let her know what happened, and that she felt as if the kiss had only happened because Bob was emotional. She also let it slip to Nat that she had been harboring a crush on Bob since they first met, and despite trying to ignore it, it continued to grow. Nat told her the band should perform at the Hard Deck that weekend, and Y/N agreed only if Bob was okay with it. She texted Bob and he decided it was time to overcome the fear of the Dagger Squad knowing he was in a band. If he couldn’t overcome the fear of telling her how he felt, and how the kiss made him feel, then he could at least do this. And so it was set, the group would be performing at the Hard Deck, and Bob let that distract him from whatever else he was feeling at the time.
Saturday finally came, and Bob was a ball of nerves. He was sure the squad wouldn’t be too harsh towards him, but when it came to Hangman, he could never tell. When he arrived at the bar to do sound checks, he saw her again and a bit of his nerves calmed. She looked at him with a gentle but nervous smile “Hey Bob, glad you made it. We’re just gonna run through a few songs, and then we’ll get going with the show. I also brought a new song, it’s not too much but it will be the last song for the night.” He nodded his head, a bit lost in her eyes. He pushed his glasses up a bit and got his drums set up. After sound check, people started filling in the bar. Nat came up to him with a bit of a smirk, “I know about your kiss with Miss Gorgeous Singer up there.” She then lightly punched his arm, “Why wouldn’t you tell me, Bob? This is important information and I thought we were best friends.” She had a faux pout on her lips now and he shrugged, “I don’t know what happened Nat, it was going so well and then she just ran out.” He looked down, twirling his drumsticks, and she realized he was quite upset. She’s guessing the two idiots haven’t even talked about it. “I’m sorry Bob, but hey maybe things will work out after tonight,” she said with a comforting smile. It was at that moment, Jake, Javy, Bradley, and Mickey realized it was their own “Baby on Board” on the drums for tonight.
“Well well well, what do we have here?” Jake said with his usual smirk on his face. “Cut it bagman.” Natasha quickly replied, she realized it was time for the band to start so she gave Bob a final comforting smile, then quickly pushed Jake and the rest of the guys back.
You got on stage and introduced the band. The show started and everything was going well. Bob was keeping up, concentrating hard and using the quick time between songs to push his glasses up his nose. Finally it was time for the new song, and he was a bit nervous, seeing as they hadn’t rehearsed it yet. He heard you clear your throat as you said “Hey y’all, this last song is a new one I wrote about a week ago. Sometimes you just meet someone and realize you will always be there for them no matter what.” With that, you looked back to the group and nodded to let them know it was time to start.
I’m the watermelon slammed into your driveway
Crack me open so I feel the air inside me
Bob stared at her while playing and realized that in someway, she had cracked his introverted shell. She helped him become more comfortable. She even was a huge reason he had a group of people who cared about him, outside of the dagger squad. He quickly looked at Natasha in the crowd, just to see her smirking right at him.
Music boyfriend I’m your yum yum
Call me and I’ll come
Y/N’s words from weeks prior echoed in his head as she sang, “If you need anything please know I am a call away.” And it hit him in this moment that maybe just maybe, she did feel the same way about him.
Am I dreaming or did you just kiss me
You don’t know it but you already miss me
He looked back at her and realized she was looking at him. Singing this song to him. She had a bashful smile on her face, and he could tell she was a nervous.
Fuck the rest of them
Fuck em all
Fuck em all but us
In this moment, everyone else in the bar seemed to fade away. It was just them, and he made the decision to admit what he was feeling after the show. She was breathtaking, and he thinks he may not make it if he doesn’t tell her tonight. She finally turned away in time to sing the last line to the crowd.
Fuck em all but us.
When the song ended, the bar was full of applause, even the squad looked impressed by the show. Bob watched her walk off stage after saying her thank yous, and head for the back deck. He got up to follow but was immediately stopped by the Dagger Squad, they were all patting him on the back and smiling at him. “Didn’t think you had it in you Bob, but that was truly amazing. And it seems as if the singer thinks so too.” Jake said to him with a genuine smile on his face. Natasha pushed Jake out of the way and gave Bob a hug, pulling away she said “Go get her, we’ll all still be here when you get back.” With that Bob gave a quick thank you and rushed toward the back door.
He saw y/n standing there, arms crossed over the railing and head up to the sky. When she heard the door open, she turned her head and she had a sheepish smile on her face. He thought she looked so beautiful, a bit sweaty from the show, the moon as backlighting. Her beauty rivaled that of the ocean. She was gorgeous in every sense of the word.
“You did good tonight Bobby. Thank you for letting us come play here.” She said softly as he made his way over to her. He felt warmth crawl up his neck at the use of his nickname, and he put his hand on his neck as he told her “You were gorgeous tonight.” She gave a soft laugh and bashfully turned her head. Before she could respond he continued talking, “Thank you. For everything. You invited me to this band, not even knowing if I was a good drummer. You texted me daily just to make sure I was doing okay. You made me possibly the best food I’ve had in forever. Don’t tell my ma I said that, she would never let me live it down.” He chuckled while saying that, he took a deep breath in and continued, “You have changed me as a person, so thank you.” She looked back at him, eyes wide, mouth agape. She had tears lining the bottom of her eyes, as she rushed over to hug him. “I’m so sorry I ran out of your apartment that night. I was nervous you were only kissing me because of the emotions from the movie and the tiredness. But that kiss meant everything to me. I haven’t stopped thinking about it or you since it happened.” Her speech was a bit muffled from the way she was pressed to Bob. Now it was his turn to look a bit shocked, he hadn’t even thought about how she might have thought it was all her fault. He held her and said“Darlin’ I think we’ve both been a bit idiotic. I’ve wanted to kiss you ever since I met you, and after that night I thought I messed everything up. I truly like you, I think I might even be falling in love with you if I’m honest.” She pulled back a bit and looked him in the eyes for the slightest sign that he could be lying, when she couldn’t find one she put her hand on his neck and pulled his lips to hers. This kiss was different. This kiss held all of the unspoken feelings they’ve both kept bottled up for months. He grabbed her hips and pushed her back against the railing, she opened her mouth to gasp, allowing his tongue to slip inside.
She tugged at his hair and he let out a quiet groan. Just as he was making way to pick her up, the loud noise of several nosey aviators cheering burst their bubble. She pulled back and leant her forehead on his chest, shying away a bit. He turned back to see the group smiling, clapping, whooping, and hollering. He turned back towards her and lifted her face up to his, “I’m sorry about them. Also I’m sorry I feel like I’m doing this a bit backwards, but would you like to go out for dinner soon?” He felt a bit nervous asking the question but she just looked at him like he hung all the moon and stars. “Sure, how about we go talk to your friends for a bit, then go pick up some food, and maybe finish what we start at your place?” She asked with a flirty smirk on her face. Yeah she was going to be the death of him.
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@zepskies
Aww thank you sweetie! 🥰
It does make sense, poor thing. 😭 She's so unwilling to believe he could love her the way she wants/needs, while he's hesitating to allow himself to do it. And I'm thinking he's fighting off some self-doubt/self-worth issues as well?
Yes! I think that both of them are having some "self-doubt/self-worth issues." I think that deep down Ben is having those issues especially after she told him that he's not really a relationship guy and after he saw how she was "considering" Jake. Ben would never admit feeling inferior to someone else, but I think that he really does feel a little bit intimidated by Jake in some ways. I think Ben sees how Jake is in essence what the reader "wants" and Ben doesn't know how to be that. And I also think that's why Ben's been buying her coffee and walks with her to work.
LMAO factssss. Who could say no to that adorably confused grandpa face?
No one should look that cute while being confused. It should be illegal lol.
Ooooh yesssss. 😏 And totally agree with you there! It's too bittersweet for me when you know one of them is going to die someday and the other keeps living on, carrying the weight of their memory. It's why I had to come up with that twist in BMD loll. Thank you for noting on that! It took some head scratching and BS science (and some inspo from my love of Smallville), but I think the reasoning was convincing enough on how the reader in BMD "caught up" with his longevity of life. 😂 I also love the idea of the plants giving her healing abilities and prolonging her life through that cell regeneration. 💚💚
I think it's the hopeless romantic in me that can't take the idea of one person "carrying on the weight of their memory." And I know you can sympathize, also being a hopeless romantic 🥰 One of the best parts of being a writer is coming up with the BS science LOL. And oh I thought it made complete sense in BMD! It was completely something that I never saw coming!!
I'm losing it over the gif. I LOVE "My Big Fat Greek Wedding."
Oh Ben, he'll get there. He just needs some actual love in his life, and someone stubborn enough to not only put up with his shit, but like you said, "take a chance" on him. 😉
Exactly lol. He needs someone to show him what love really looks like.
It's always my pleasure to read your stories, hun! Giving the feedback is the least I can do. 💕
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Aww my sweet friend thank you so much! Hearing your feedback always means the world to me. ❤️
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Chapter 14: Don't Be A Bundt Cake
Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV, Soldier Boy POV
Summary:  When you decided to work with Butcher and his merry band of supe hunters to take down Homelander, you never expected to be saddled with a sullen, grumpy, jerk like Soldier Boy when the job was done. The more you're around him the more you hate him, but you can't help but wonder, is he really as big a jerk as you think? Reader is a supe with plant powers. This takes place in an AU about a month after the end of The Boys Season 3, in which Butcher has let Soldier Boy continue to work with him on his team.  (I'm real bad at summaries, please forgive me!)
Tropes: Enemies to Lovers (Not in this chapter), Slow Burn, Age Difference (Reader is in her 20s), Soft Ben/ Soldier Boy, Protective Ben/Soldier Boy, Miscommunication Trope
Word Count: 13.1K
Warnings: I'm going to label this 18+ because Soldier Boy (he's a warning and everyone knows it), Swearing, Mentions of Sex, Sexual Innuendo, Talks of Death, DENIAL, Idiots in Love, Pining by the Reader (and SB, but he won't admit it) Depressing Thoughts, Mentions of sexual assault/rape (not detailed at all, really just in passing) Talks about weed, Sexist comments, Ben makes derogatory comments, Threatening Ben/Soldier Boy might be a little bit OOC.
Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!
Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.
Series Masterlist
Main Masterlist
A/N: I am so sorry this one took me a bit longer. The writers block was fighting me the whole way, but we are very closely nearing the end of this series and the moment the reader and Ben stop being so stinkin' stubborn.
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Reader POV
You lean your forehead against the cool window, watching the world flash by in a flurry of color. The wooded forests had vanished hours ago and all that was left were the yellowed sprawling fields of corn and grain and family farms that were laid sporadically along the interstate. Each one a little world that caught the flecks of golden sunlight as the sun began to peak above the horizon.
The bus rolled smooth and steady over the weathered pavement towards it's destination and was filled with an odd assortment of people young and old. There was man with a brightly colored parrot that had been singing "It's A Small World After All" since you left NYC, a woman with a little boy playing with an iPad and who refused to turn down the volume no matter how many times his mother asked him to, a group of teenagers a few seats up that continued to pass around a flask, and due to how far back you were sitting on the bus an uncomfortable smell emanated from the bathroom each time the door was opened.
But you didn't notice any of it.
The only thing on your mind were the events that happened almost twenty hours ago. They continued to circle your mind, playing over and over again like a perverted cassette tape making you sink further into the worn cloth covered seat at the back of the bus. The images were haunting, some new and some old, but all the more still horrible to re-live.
The song "Nights In White Satin" floating into the backseat of your family's car, the flash of unnatural light you knew was never lightning, the caskets at your parent's funeral covered in flowers that were much to pretty to lay on something so morbid, Elijah's body succumbing to the poppies that ripped him apart, the proud sneer on your brother's face when he admitted to killing your parents, Darren's broken and bloodied body strewn in pieces over the street with the creature standing over him with a dripping red maw, the ruined building that housed "Please Don't Die" reduced to nothing more than rubble, and the look on Ben's face when you turned your back on him and fled the scene.
For some reason that particular image seemed to cling on to you and refused to fade. You'd never seen him look that way, almost… helpless and a little fearful. In all the time you'd known him, Ben had never looked at you that way. Sure you'd seen him proud, angry, cocky, lustful, mischievous, but never fearful. And you were sure that it wasn't an emotion that he was used to feeling, but that begged the question… why?
Why was he looking at me like that? Why wouldn't he let me go? And what was he afraid of?
The creature curled in your lap snorts something in it's sleep, turning it’s head further into the cradle of your elbow to shut out the brilliant early morning sunlight. It was now the size of a toaster and had warranted several odd looks whenever you got off to change buses, but you didn't care.
You weren't sure about anything anymore. Everything your brother confessed to you made you feel like you were living a lie and the revelation of exactly what your powers could do- take life from plants to heal yourself, create whatever the hell it was on your lap, and speak to plants… it scared you.
You thought for so long that you knew everything about your powers, that you were in control, but now you weren't sure.
You felt different, as if something had unlocked deep down that you couldn't shut up again.
You'd felt different after you killed Elijah, but this was more alive, weaving and twisting in the pit of your stomach. You felt more connected to the earth, to the world outside the bus even though you were divided by glass and metal. You could feel the energy that thrummed through the body of the creature on your lap, bending to your will, the life force of the plants it was formed from molding with you, becoming a part of you.
You felt so different than the person you had been before Darren entered the shop, so uncertain, and there was only one place you wanted to be when you felt like this… home. You couldn't wait to run up the worn front steps of your grandmother's house and into her arms. She always knew what to say in times like this.
And you desperately needed the comfort of her embrace.
The phone in your pocket buzzes again and you flip the screen to see the ridiculous selfie Annie and you had taken on Halloween last year. The one that you'd both spent dressed up as the two brothers from your favorite paranormal tv show. It wasn't the first time she'd called. Annie had called and texted you more times than you could count over the past twenty hours but you didn't answer her. You didn’t want to.
It was the first time that you didn't want to talk to her, but talking to her meant that you'd have to re-live all of it again and you were clawing at the last shred of sanity you had left to keep it together.
The overwhelming waves of emotion kept pummeling you, dragging you deeper beneath the white surf. Each one brought the memories of what happened surging over you and were followed by everything that Darren said to you. Years of taking care of Darren and doing whatever he wished were tearing at your soul, years of giving up little things in your life to make him happy, and years of taking care of a man who you thought cared about you, but hated you enough to kill your parents and try to kill you too.
It made your skin crawl. Each time your brother told you that he loved you was an even bigger lie and now that you knew the truth and saw him for what he was, it felt like you were drowning. The darkness that ebbed just on the edge was begging you to leap into the abyss, but you were resisting the best you could.
The tears had stopped falling miles ago, but you couldn't stop the memories or the emotion that formed a cold ball in the pit of your stomach.
A sigh works it's way up and you pull your legs on the seat underneath you, jostling the creature on your lap that raises it's head for a moment to blink it's black eyes at you sleepily.
It was surprisingly docile right now, especially considering that twenty hours ago it had ripped your brother to shreds. In fact it seemed to understand how upset you were and had spent the better part of the last twenty hours rubbing it's head against your arm as if trying to bring you some comfort. It was settled on your lap, the weight of it a comfort, almost like a weighted plushy that gave you something to focus on.
"It's alright buddy." You whisper, scratching him under his chin. "We're almost home."
The phone in your jacket pocket buzzes again, but when you pull it out to turn it off, you catch a glimpse of the screen, and you hesitate. Because this time it's not Annie who's calling, it’s Ben.
The picture that flashes on the screen under the contact name "Gramps" is the picture of Mr. Fredrickson from Up. It always made you smile whenever he called you and you saw the picture because Ben did often remind you of him. He was certainly just as grumpy as Mr. Fredrickson and just as out of touch, but you thought it was cute.
Your thumb hovers over the answer button and you think about talking to him.
But what would I say?
You weren't sure what to say to him, or why you wanted to speak to him so badly, why you wanted him to be sitting here on the bus with you as you went home, and why you wanted him to hold you against his chest while you allowed yourself to break, but you did. You wanted to feel his awkward shoulder pat and his awkward version of hand holding and you wanted to hear him try to tell you to "buck up" or whatever he thought that a comforting word should be.
He's really not the best at that.
You smile to yourself at the memory of how he tried to comfort you back at the hospital, but the longer you sit there and look down at the picture on the screen the worse you feel.
Maybe that scared you more than your newfound powers, how much you were realizing that you needed him, how much you depended on him when things got too much for you to bear. The memory of him appearing as soon as you needed him back at the shop, another of him grabbing Darren and throwing him into the street as soon as Darren insulted you comes in a flash, and finally followed by the memory of Ben carrying you out of Elijah's office while you curled into his chest. You couldn't remember too much from that moment, in fact you'd thought that Ben had kissed you on top of your head, but you ascribed that to the haze of pain you'd been in from your broken arm.
What you did remember was how wonderfully warm he was after you'd been trapped in that damn freezer and how nice it felt to be in his arms. Another memory of Ben sleeping on the couch at the hospital bubbles up and you feel something in your chest begin to crack open. And you try your best to tell yourself the same thing that you always do when you feel like Ben might care more about you that he was letting on.
Ben doesn't want that. He's made it perfectly clear. He doesn't want a relationship. He's only wants one night, that's why he goes out with all those women-
You hesitate, thumb still hovering over the answer button as you do, the memory of the week you'd spent at the apartment with him flickering in the back of your mind. The week where he refused to leave you alone in the apartment, where he refused to do any jobs for Butcher, where he took care of you the best way he could, when he sat with you on the couch and made you laugh with his ridiculous movies, and the week where he hadn't had one date.
Your finger itched to answer the phone, but you couldn't, because you didn't want to feel this way about Ben, not when he'd told you countless times that you kept romanticizing him, not when he told you that he didn't want a relationship, and not when you could feel yourself beginning to fall for someone you thought was the wrong man.
For just a moment you tried to pretend that it was different, that he was different, but you didn't want to. It only made it hurt more.
The phone stops ringing, but the pit in your stomach still gapes open at you and for the first time in twenty hours you feel tears begin to fall. You didn't know why you were crying about this, why the thought of not picking up Ben's phone call seemed to hurt more than everything that had happened, but something made it hurt.
The bus driver announces over the overhead that you're reaching your final destination as he takes the exit for your hometown. The familiar buildings that line the streets are sheathed in a honeyed glow from the sun, the long shadow of the bus darkening them momentarily as it rumbles down the small streets to the bus station.
When it rumbles to a stop at the bus station you wait for everyone else to get off, trying to summon the strength to stand, and swipe the back of your hand across your face to rid yourself of the remaining tears.
The bus station was about a thirty minute walk from your grandmother's house, and you still hadn't called her. You didn't know what to say, didn't know how to tell her that Darren was dead and that he was the reason why your parents were dead.
The creature crawls up your body to drape it's warm body over the back of your neck as you stand. It wasn't bothering to hide, besides the people in your hometown already thought that you were odd because you were a supe and you'd always welcomed it. You give him a scratch on top of his head and his warm tongue flicks on the bottom of your earlobe as if thanking you before it curls further into the side of your neck, seeking warmth.
The first few steps on solid ground are shaky, but you find the strength while taking in a deep cleansing breath of the outside world, letting the gentle warmth of the sun and the tickle of the autumn breeze pull at your coat. You hadn't stopped at your apartment before coming here, instead you had stumbled your way to the bus station covered in dust, flecked in blood, and demanded the first ticket back to Illinois. It was lucky that the next bus was leaving immediately, because you didn’t want to spend another second in NYC, not when all you wanted was to be home.
Plus you were worried that someone had recorded what exactly happened outside the plant shop and you didn't want to get arrested.
It was self defense anyway. Maybe Jake would represent me in court.
The thought of Jake makes you twinge. You hadn't checked to see if he was alright before you ran from the scene. Not to mention you'd destroyed the shop he'd put all his life savings into after he stopped being a lawyer.
Oh fuck, what if he sues me? He can't exactly sue Darren…
You hear someone call your name and you open your eyes.
Your grandmother is standing in front of the same baby blue pickup truck that she'd had longer than you've been alive, wearing a long multicolored skirt and a pressed white blouse tucked elegantly into it. Her silver hair is loose and long, curling over her shoulders in gentle waves. She looks the same way she looked one week ago when she left, and you've never seen anything so beautiful in your life.
You're running before you can stop yourself, crumbling into her warm embrace, with more tears streaking down your face, but she doesn't mind.
"Shh. It's alright honey." She whispers, rubbing her hand over your back, her embrace steady and surprisingly strong. "Let's go home."
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Her home is the same as it's always been. A two story Victorian house painted in a happy yellow shade, with a white wrap around porch and two white rocking chairs sitting empty on the front porch. You'd spent more nights than you could count rocking silently beside her with a crochet project in your lap listening to the rain fall and soak the world outside, while the plants sang praises with every gentle bend beneath the heavy droplets.
You could barely remember the home you spent in your early years with your parents, not when you'd spent most of your childhood spending the night here and after your parents died living here permanently. There was still a large oak tree were a wooden swing swung in the slight breeze on the left side of the yard, a gardenia bush that stretched as high as the second story on the right side of the house and brushed it's soft leaves against the sunshine colored outer walls, a garden filled with both flowering plants and herbs that perked up on both sides of the front yard as you walked up the path, and a cobblestone path that Annie and you had spent hours of your shared childhood covering in chalk art.
Neither of you were good, but when the rain would fall and smudge the clean lines, you'd jump in the puddles that pooled along the walkway singing the lyrics to ABBA's "Cassandra" not quite understanding what it meant.
Standing here outside your house made you miss Annie and feel worse about not calling or texting her back, but you didn't feel like talking about what happened and you were sure that Butcher filled her in. The only thing that you wanted was to collapse in your bedroom upstairs and curl under the comforters.
Despite everything the house was a welcome sight, but at the same time it was different. You could feel the plants calling out to you, asking for you, bending towards you just to touch your shoes as you walked by. You'd never felt so connected with them before, not even when you were in your apartment or working at the shop.  It was overwhelming.
And although a part of you was frightened by it, another part of you rejoiced in it. You didn't feel alone, didn't feel weak, and you knew that you never would ever again.
The creature nuzzled into the side of your neck with a sigh, soaking up the sun's healing rays as you walked up the front steps with your grandmother following behind you silently. She hadn't spoken since she picked you up at the bus station and you hadn't supplied anything in the ten minute car ride back to her house.
You didn't know where to start and you were still trying to process everything yourself.
The inside of her house was just as cozy and warm as it was the day you moved out. There were photos of your parents and you covering the walls (Darren's had been placed in the closet long ago), half-finished knitting projects sorted in different baskets on both the dining room table and the living room coffee table, spools of yarn were strewn over the couch sorted by color, and the fresh smell of gardenia wafted through the open windows on the breeze.
It was home. This was what you'd been missing the moment everything began to crash over you, but as you stood there in the familiar living room it felt like something was missing. Something tugged at the back of your mind, but you couldn't put your finger on it.
There was something or rather someone that should be here, but you didn't know what or who. And your mind supplied Annie, but you weren't sure that's who you meant.
"Let's have some tea." Your grandmother says from behind you and you feel her soft hands come down on your shoulders to steer you through the familiar creative chaos and into the large kitchen at the back of the house.
The kitchen isn't spared from the madness, it rarely was. There are boxes upon boxes of cookies in different stages of being packaged all over the counter, dirty bowls and a measuring cup stacked in the sink, and a large opened bag of chocolate chips spilling over the flour covered kitchen island.
It wasn't unusual to find the kitchen or the house in a state of chaos, your grandmother always said that a house should look lived in and that the mess was part of the fun of any major project as long as you were responsible enough to clean it up.
"Bake sale?" You ask as you sit down in the breakfast nook, uttering the first words that you'd said to another human being in twenty hours.
The next breath that you inhale was supposed to be cleansing, but you can still feel a weight pressing down on your chest, the same one that settled in the moment everything happened with Darren.
You contemplate again how you're going to tell her that Darren is dead and was the reason why your parents died.
Damn it Darren.
"Mhmm." She hums, filling the well used red kettle. "Annie's mother practically cornered me in the supermarket yesterday and begged me to make cookies. I love Annie, but her mother needs someone to pull that stick out of her ass. It's been up there for so long that I'm sure it's rotten."
The creature crawls down from your shoulders and down your arm to sniff at one of the chocolate chip cookies nearest you. It hadn't eaten since…
Darren.
You wince slightly at the thought and hope that you hadn't created something that needed and craved human flesh. The last thing you wanted to unleash on the world was Audry two especially in the wake of Homelander.
Truthfully you were waiting for the guilt at killing your brother to come, but it never had and you wondered if it ever would.
Probably not. He deserved that, he killed our parents, he tried to kill me, he tried to kill Ben.
The thought of Ben again makes a lump form in the back of your throat. You didn't know what was happening to you only that you felt guilty for leaving him like that, for yelling at him to let you go, and just vanishing on him when he probably thought that you were going back to the apartment.
He doesn't know where I am. Maybe that's why he tried to call, because he got back to the apartment and couldn't find me there and he was worried. You press your lips together. Yeah. Worried. Right.
"Honey?" Your grandmother says in a soothing voice
You look up from the box of chocolate chip cookies that you didn't remember picking up. Even the creature is looking at you with an expression that you can only explain as worry.
"Yeah?" Your voice shakes slightly.
She's leaning back against the counter, arms crossed over her chest, head tilted slightly to the side, her beautiful grayed hair pulled up in an elegant bun, but in her eyes you can see genuine concern. "Fuck." She sighs after a minute.
You blink in surprise. It was the first time that you'd ever heard her say that word in your entire life.
"I shouldn't have left." She breathes. "I told Ben to look out for you. I told him, that little bastard was bound to show up again and what did he do? He left you at that plant shop alone with no protection!"
You'd only seen her really angry a handful of times in your lifetime. Like you, your grandmother often had a gentle disposition and didn't get angry unless the situation called for it.
I mean, Darren admitted to killing our parents and then got fucking ripped apart. But how does she know about any of that? I haven't told her…
"How did you know that he left me there? Did Ben call you?" You ask putting down the box of cookies.
An odd expression crosses her face, as if she's contemplating something. "No." She hesitates again. "I saw it."
"No." Your grandmother hesitates. "I saw it."
"You saw it?" You repeat, confused.
What's going on?
"Too late of course, but I'm a little rusty. I was able to warn Ben that Darren was coming back. That's how he got there so quickly or rather-" She shrugs sheepishly. "He got there in time to make sure that Darren didn't get you to forgive him. Which you shouldn't have at all, but I know he's always had a talent for manipulating you."
"What?"
Is she saying what I think she's saying?
Instead of explaining further your grandmother walks out of the kitchen, leaving the kettle behind on the stove and you in a state of utter confusion.
Is she saying that she can see the future? Because that would mean that she's a supe and there's only one supe in history that I know of that can do that. A supe that no one has seen in over forty years.
You can hear her open the door to the closet under the stairs and the sound of her sifting through all the junk that the two of you had shoved in there over the years instead of finding the right place to put it.
When she comes back into the kitchen, she's holding a giant cardboard file box that you'd never paid attention to each time you opened the closet to find something. Your eyes shift from the box to her still not comprehending exactly what she was saying.
"I probably should have told you this a while ago, but…" She trails off and nods her head at the box before turning back to the kettle on the stove that has begun to scream. "I kept putting it off."
The box is old, worn at the edges, and theres a musty black fabric beneath a collection of yellowed photographs. You pull out the one on top to examine it.
Ben is standing there in his full Soldier Boy regalia outside of Vought tower and the woman standing next to him is Soothsayer. The outfit she wore was familiar, a black-skin tight suit with a blind fold tied over her eyes.
Soothsayer was a supe who could see the future and who was apart of Payback, a supe that had vanished a year before the mission in Nicaragua and no one knew where she went. There were rumors that she'd died and that she'd been a Russian spy, but you'd never believed them. You'd heard Butcher talk about how he tried to find her when he was trying to figure out what happened to Soldier Boy, but he never had. Said that the trail went cold.
But now you knew where she went, because she was standing directly in front of you.
She's Soothsayer? Holy fuck that's why Ben kept accusing her of cheating in the poker game because he knew that she could see the future.
"You were Soothsayer?" You gasp. "But why didn't you say anything? Why didn't you tell me?"
She continues to measure the tea leaves. "I didn't tell anyone."
"Grandpa didn't know? But he was alive when you were a supe?"
Your grandfather had never spoken about a history with supes that you remember.
"No." She turns to look at you, a hurt expression crossing over her face for a minute. "Well, I know that I said I was going to have tea, but if we're going to talk about this I'm going to need something a little bit stronger."
Your grandmother opens a cabinet under the stove an pulls out an enormous bottle of scotch. Truth be told you'd never seen her drink more than just a glass of wine, to see her like this was about as shocking as seeing a polar bear sunning itself on a Florida beach.
"Do you still want the blueberry tea or do you need something a little stronger?" She looks back over her shoulder at you as she pulls down a glass for herself.
"I think I need something stronger." You answer honestly.
Learning about everything Darren had done was one thing, but finding out that your grandmother used to be a famous supe and that she never told you about it was another thing. It was like looking at another person. You'd always loved your grandmother's gentle way, her care for her community and her family soft, but now you weren't sure you really knew who she was.
She sits down across from you and hands you a glass of the amber colored liquid. There's a heavy silence that hangs between the two of you as she tries to find a way to start. The photo of her and Ben is laying on top of what you realize is her uniform inside the box and she smiles down at the photo, just a little twitch at the corner of her lips.
"I met Ben when I was twenty three years old." She begins taking a sip from the glass. "Legend 'discovered' me. I had the injection of Compound V maybe two years before that, not when I was born, but I hadn't gotten popular. Other powers were much more flashy and by then there were so many heroes coming out of the woodwork that someone with the ability to see the future didn't seem as marketable."
There's something reflected in her blue eyes, the same eyes your father had, that you can't place. "I had just moved to New York, I had no money, and the way I was getting it was by pretending to be a fortune teller and betting on some sports events on the side. It wasn't hard to prove that I could see the future, the past was more difficult, but Legend somehow stumbled into my shop and figured out that I was a supe. And he didn't think I was too bad looking so he helped me get big."
"You pretended to be a fortune teller?"
She snorts into her glass. "Mhmm. People really will believe anything if they're desperate enough and back then there was so much turmoil going on with Russia that people were scared and wanted to feel comforted. My job provided some of that."
"But why did you walk away from it if you were such a big hero." You ask. "Everyone knew your name, you were-"
Your grandmother raises an eyebrow at you and you fall silent so she can continue. "When I got onto Payback that's when everything exploded for me, the films, the commercials, the ridiculous ads." She sighs. "That's also when I met Ben."
You take a sip from the glass in front of you, sputtering slightly. It was stronger than you were expecting. "And you two were-"
Please don't say dating, please don't say dating, please don't say…
"Friends. Just friends." Diana sits back against the back of the breakfast nook, sinking into the navy blue pillows. "But he is almost as charming now as he was then."
You cringe at the thought of Ben coming on to a younger version of your grandmother.
She taps her glass with her index finger deep in thought. "But I think that I was the only person that Ben actually talked to, the only person that he was comfortable being around."
"What do you mean?" You ask confused. "Didn't he talk to Countess and to Legend?"
Her expression hardens at the mention of Countess's name. "He didn't talk to her the way he talked to me. Ben is difficult, he always has been and I think that most of the people he meet him write him off as this asshole with a chauvinistic look on the world, but he's not. At least, not all the time. There are so many people that he's met that are never willing to take a chance on him. To trust that there is really something beneath all of that bravado."
It was what you had been thinking for the past week, that there was more to Ben than he was willing to let people see, but you were slowly realizing that Ben was letting you see those parts. In the quiet moments at your shared apartment when he sat with you while you read or made you laugh or walked you to and from work you saw another side of Ben that you never saw when he was around anyone else. The guilt rises again when you think of how you ran from him, how you turned your back and left him standing there to clean up your mess.
I shouldn’t have done that, but it was all just so overwhelming and I didn't want to talk to anyone.
"I think that Ben is the most loyal friend I ever had. No one ever seems to believe me when I say that. That we were just friends, but nothing happened between us."
"You didn't date? Or sleep together?" You ask cautiously. It was difficult to imagine Ben being friends with a woman and not having a sexual relationship with her.
Well. We're friends, but that's different.
The last thing you wanted to think about was Ben and your grandmother having sex.
I would need so much therapy after that. You sigh. Yeah, because after all the shit I've been through and found out about my life in the last twenty hours, the knowledge that Ben fucked my grandmother is what's going to push me over the edge.
"No." She shakes her head with a small smile. "About a week after I met Ben, I was running late to a movie shoot and I stepped off the crosswalk without looking. There was a car coming and I didn't see it. Ironic isn't it?" She laughs at herself. "I can see the future and I didn't see a car coming, but your grandfather did and he grabbed the back of my jacket and yanked me onto the sidewalk, saved my life. And the second my eyes locked with his I saw our future. I saw our wedding, our first house, I saw our son take his first steps and I saw how much I would love him and how much he would love me." She clears her throat for a minute, her fingers tighten on the glass, and her gaze drops to the wedding ring on her left hand. “The future is never set in stone, it’s fluid. It morphs and shapes with your decisions, but in the future I saw, I was so happy. And I didn’t want to lose that.”
Your grandfather had passed a few years ago, but you knew it weighed on her everyday. She had spent the week after he died in her room not saying anything to anyone. And sometimes she'd look out the window into the backyard with an odd expression, but you knew that meant she was thinking of him.
Growing up you'd seen how in love the two of them were, more so than your parents. Seen the flowers your grandfather always brought home just because he was thinking of her, watched him do little things around the house without being asked, saw how they never walked away angry from one another, and seen the soppy expression he'd get when he watched your grandmother move around the kitchen baking with a grace that you'd never possessed.
You reach across the table to touch her hand and she takes it gratefully.
"I didn't want to tell him that I was a supe, and at the beginning I thought I could balance it all, but then Ben started dating Countess." She takes another sip from her glass. "She hated me."
"What? Why?" You ask. The creature crawls across the table to sniff at the glass in front of you, before it snorts and falls into your lap, curling into a ball.
"Countess was a bitch." Your grandmother says mirthlessly, her expression hardening. "She wanted to possess Ben completely. Only loved how famous he was, how popular it made her, and he threw himself at her feet, in his own way, not understanding that love didn’t look that way. He’s never had a good example of it in his life. And she never understood that Ben and I were just friends. By then I had been dating your grandfather for a few months and things were getting serious. It was about a year before everything that happened in Nicaragua."
She presses her lips together as if remembering what happened to Ben there. "She was jealous, possessive, and she came to me one night. Ben was out of town for a film so she knew we wouldn’t be interrupted. She threatened to tell your grandfather who I really was and threatened to kill him.” Her jaw sets. “My powers were never really as offensive as hers were. And she said that Ben wouldn’t ever protect me over her because he loved her and would do anything to make her happy. So I left and I never looked back.”
And here I thought I couldn't hate Countess any more than I did for what she did to Ben.
“You didn’t talk to him ever again?” You wonder out loud.
She left without telling him goodbye?
“There was the occasional phone call. Sometimes Ben would ask me to see who was going to win a ball game or something so he could make a few bucks. He stopped by to say hi a few times because he was in the neighborhood. One time he brought your father a baseball glove that was way too big for a one year old.” She snorts, the memory flashing in her eyes. “I always thought Ben would be a good dad some day. But I think seeing your father was when Ben realized how much he wanted to have kids. And I think seeing the way your grandfather treated me made him start to feel conflicted about Countess. But he respected that I walked away, he saw that I was happy.”
“But what about Nicaragua?"
A dark look crosses her face followed by something that looks suspiciously like guilt. “I saw what they were going to do to him.”
“What? But why didn't you tell him what they were planning? Why didn't you-"
"I tried." She snaps, shoulders tense, but then they drop. "I called Ben, but Stan answered. By then your father was turning two, your grandfather had opened up his practice, and Stan threatened me, he knew where we were and knew everything about us. So I kept my mouth shut and I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”
You could feel your heart breaking for her.
Ben was her best friend and she had to sit by and watch them do that to him. She saw what they were going to do and they were going to kill her for it, kill my family for it.
The anger that surges in your chest makes the creature in your lap stir and grow a few inches, but you tamp it down before it gets bigger than a small dog.
“Does Ben know?” You ask her to distract yourself.
You didn't want Ben to hate your grandmother for this, didn't want him to hate her for something that wasn't her fault.
She nods. “Yes. I told him everything.”
“When?”
“The moment I saw him in your hospital room. I couldn’t keep it in any longer. I wasn't expecting him to be there, but it all poured out of me. I was so surprised to see him there. I hadn't seen a future where he came back."
“Was he mad?”
I mean… he didn't seem mad when I woke up, not to mention he was upset when she left to come back to Illinois.
“Not at me.” She shakes her head. “He knew how much I wanted a normal life and how much I loved your grandfather. He doesn’t blame me for any of it.”
“Good. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”
The glass in front of you is still more than half-full but you don't want to risk another sip of what you're sure is gasoline packaged to look like Scotch. Your grandmother reaches to pour herself another glass.
“I didn’t want to until you were ready.”
“And when would that be?”
Your grandmother shrugs. “Maybe on my deathbed.”
You weren't angry for her not telling you, more surprised, but now that you knew everything about her it was hard to see her the same way you had.
 You snort. “And no one knew?”
“Your dad figured it out.”
“How? When?”
“The moment you made that strawberry plant grow from your high chair.” She shakes her head with a smile. “It skipped a generation. Don’t know why, but you got it all somehow.”
“I was never injected?”
“No. That was a lie your father created. He knew that your grandfather didn't know and he knew that I didn't want your grandfather to know."
“Darren thought I was.”
“I know.”
At the mention of your brother's name, you watch her expression harden and she takes another swig from the glass in front of her, not flinching as the liquid goes down her throat.
“Did you see everything that happened?” You ask in a small voice.
You still weren't 100% sure how it was her powers worked, but you figured that she was able to see some of what Darren did and what he said.
“Yes.”
“You heard everything Darren said?"
“Yes.”
You chew the inside of your cheek for a minute hoping that she didn't take it as hard as you did. “Did you know that he killed them?”
“No.” She breathes, rolling the glass between her hands for a moment. “The night they died, I got a vision a few minutes before the car ran off the road. I was the one who called the police and who told them where to look, but I never saw that it was Darren or that it was anyone causing the accident. All I saw was the three of you in the car. I should have known.” Her voice breaks.
“It’s not your fault.” You squeeze her hand.
“And it’s not yours either.” She squeezes your hand back.
The memories are beginning to float up from the recesses of your mind and your teeth clench together as you try to keep them at bay.
“I know.” You breathe. The memory of the ruined shop flashes through your head. “I didn’t know that I could do something like that.” You gently touch your healed right arm and glance at the creature that is nibbling on the edge of the cardboard box with its sharp splinter-like teeth. “I feel so different and I don’t know how to go back to the way I was.”
“I don’t think you ever will.”
"Really?"
The thought was unwelcome. You were hoping that all of this was going to blow over, but you knew it wouldn't. Your powers had changed. There was an energy that thrummed in your veins now, stretching out of the house to the plants that grew in the garden. You could feel them all if you concentrated.
She frowns. “When you told me that you were working for Butcher I was worried about you getting involved in the supe world. I didn’t want that life for you, didn’t want you to suffer the way I did-“
“Was it really that bad?"
“Not all the time, just at the end. But I think that’s why I loved your grandfather so much. Because he was different than all the supes. He was down to earth, not just normal but-“ She shrugs. “I think Compound V does something to our minds, makes them more susceptible and when you’re surrounded by people using their powers and thinking that they’re gods it’s easy to lose who you are. I was glad I left when I did."
“Great." You huff, thinking about how your powers had grown exponentially since you killed your brother. It was scaring you to think that you would reach a point where you acted like Homelander, where you saw yourself as a god and killed anyone who stood in your way.
As tired as the stereotype of you only being able to make the flowers grow, you liked doing that. You liked healing plants, tending to them, and helping them grow. For you it had never been about using your powers the way that you had to kill Elijah and your brother and had always been about spreading a little more joy and love like your grandmother did with her kindness in her community.
Your mind flashes back to the first night that Ben stayed with you in your apartment and he'd asked you why you worked for Butcher and told you that he thought you "didn't fit."
Before you hadn't. You knew that. You weren't intimidating to look at or fueled by revenge or had a bone to pick with supes. You'd joined because you thought it was the right thing to do and because you wanted to be closer with Annie. She had been so involved in the supe world and you'd felt like you were losing your best friend. When in reality being at "Please Don't Die" was the only thing that felt natural for you.
You could feel yourself changing and you weren't sure that you wanted to and you weren't sure if you were changing for the better. Deep down you still felt like you, despite everything Darren had revealed, but your powers were greater than you'd thought they could be.
“No.” She squeezes your hand pulling you out of your head. “I don’t see you losing yourself in this.”
“You’ve seen-“ Your eyes widen.
“The future yeah.” Her lips twitch up at the ends in a smile. “It is what I do.”
“That’s so weird.”
You hadn't meant to say it, but you really didn't want to know too much about your future.
Well, not all that much. Maybe just a little.
“You of all people have no right to judge what’s weird. Not with Godzilla sitting in your lap.”
"Godzilla" yawns, flashing a mouthful of his pointy teeth, before settling back down on your thighs.
You smile for the first time in twenty hours, but then it drops. “I don’t like losing control. I thought I knew who I was but now I don’t-“ The emotions were bubbling up again, chest tightening, and lungs beginning to gasp for air. “I don’t know who I am anymore or what I am or what I can do and-“
“There’s nothing wrong with not being in control.”
“But what if I hurt someone? What if I kill-“ You body shakes as you think about all the important people in your life, Annie, Hughie, Butcher, Kimiko, MM, Frenchie- and then your mind stutters on Ben.
“Your powers are growing and there’s nothing to be afraid of or ashamed of. If you’re afraid of them it won’t get easier for you. You have to embrace the fear to see the lights that line the path through it.”
"I killed Darren, I killed Elijah-"
"Not because you lost control. You did it because you were protecting yourself and protecting your friends."
"But-"
"Who is it that you're scared of hurting? Annie?" Her expression turns sympathetic. "Annie is a supe and understands what it's like to lose control. None of us are in control all the time and it's ridiculous to believe that you won't lose control at least once."
Your throat clenches tightly, because when she asked the question you didn't see Annie's face, you saw Ben's. You knew that it was probably ridiculous to worry about hurting a guy with a nuclear reactor stuffed in his chest or a guy who'd been through every torture known to man, but you were. And you weren't entirely sure if you meant hurting him with just your powers.
Tears crest and fall down your cheeks as you sit there, throat thickening. "I don't want to hurt Ben."
"He's a little more indestructible than us sweetie." She cracks a smile, but you can't smile back and you don't answer because you're unsure how to.
She sits back against the breakfast nook and sighs, examining your face and slowly realizes what you mean. "Ben is complicated. He always has been. I like to think that most of it, is his father's fault. Has he told you anything about him?"
You shake your head.
"He was a dick. Made Ben think that he was a disappointment his whole life. I don't think that Ben has had someone love him unconditionally since his mother died. And loving Countess only made it worse for him. Her love was jealous, possessive, and I don't think that he's really come to terms with what real love should look like." She lets out a breath, tapping her index finger against the glass. "I never saw him as more than a friend, but I do love him. It's not a crime to love him."
"I don't love him." You say it immediately.
"Why not?"
"What?" You sputter. "I don't know what you're-"
"Tell me why you don't love him." Your grandma says methodically, as if she's trying to talk you through it.
"Because I-" The pressure was back in the back of your throat and you couldn't quite meet her eye. "Because-" You scramble for the answer, trying your darndest to keep your heart from clenching in your chest. "I want what you and grandpa had, what Annie and Hughie have, and what my parents had. A strong relationship with someone who sees all my flaws, the little parts, and the darkness and still choses to fall in love with me anyway. I don't want just one night I want every night. I want something real and Ben has said countless times that he-"
"So you've talked about it with Ben?" She raises an eyebrow.
"Only because he kept trying to sleep with me and I told him that I didn't want to have sex with him." You reply exasperated.
"You don't?"
"Gran!"
"What? He's attractive."
"It doesn't matter. None of it does. Because Ben has said that he doesn't have relationships, that he doesn't care about feelings, or emotions." Saying the words that Ben had told you countless times made something inside begin to shrivel up and die. "And I do. And I don't want to manipulate him into being something he's not or force him into a relationship that's doomed from the beginning. Ben is Ben. He's not changing or-"
"He has." She interrupts.
"What?"
"The Ben I saw in your hospital room is not the one I knew." She says it so matter of fact that makes it hard to breathe. "And neither was the one that I saw in your apartment when I stayed with you. I mean he is in essence Ben, but-"
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"He is changing. Not completely, but he's acting differently than when he was with Countess. I mean, I saw all the things he did for her. The way he was around her."
"Why does that matter?"
"Because he loved her."
The words make your heart seize in your chest. "Ben doesn't love me. He's my roommate and my friend-" It was the same thing that you kept telling yourself on repeat to beat back the other feelings that you hadn't quite identified yet. "And he's told me that he doesn't want a relationship and that I should try to meet other people."
That last part was a lie, but you honestly didn't know where she was going with this conversation or why it was getting so hard to breathe.
"Have you thought that maybe Ben doesn't want to love you because he's scared?"
"He doesn't love me and Ben isn't afraid of anything."
"He is. It might not look the same way on him as it does on everyone else, but if you pay close enough attention you can catch it." She hesitates. "And I think if you pay attention to you, you'll see what it is that you're afraid of too."
What does she mean? What the hell am I afraid of? Ben isn't afraid of anything, he's practically shouted that from the mountaintops like Julie Andrews.
"I already told you what I'm afraid of."
"I'm not talking about you hurting someone honey. There's something else that you refuse to admit to yourself because you're scared." She smiles sadly at you. "You should though, because when you embrace it, what comes after is really beautiful." There's a far off look in her eyes and you realize that she'd seen something further ahead that she wasn't letting on.
"And it's all I want for you. To be happy." Your grandmother stands from the other side of the booth "I think you need some rest. You drove all night long and I doubt you got any sleep. And I have to package all of these before Annie's mother calls down the four horsemen of the Apocalypse on me."
"Wait-"
"Please sweetie." She lays her hand down on your arm. "I think you'll feel a little better about all of this when you've had some rest." Her fingers raise to push back some of the hair that's fallen forward into your eyes. "Hmm?"
You didn't want to rest, you wanted to talk about this, but you knew better than to argue with her. Not to mention she was right, you hadn't slept.
"And when you wake up I'll make your favorite for dinner, alright?" She smiles, but there's something behind it that you can't place.
"Okay."
And this time you don't argue with her. You go up the worn staircase that you have your entire life and collapse onto your bed, wondering exactly what it was she saw your future hold, and what it is that you won't admit to yourself.
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Soldier Boy POV
There was no light in the apartment save from the burning red tip of Ben's blunt and the bluish glow emanating from the tv that caught the dips and sharp edges of his face. But it was nothing more than background noise.
His hand absentmindedly stroked along Bean's back, his eyes focused on the ceiling above the couch. He hadn't moved in hours. It had been over twenty four hours since everything that happened at the plant shop, since you'd summoned a creature from the depths of the store, since Darren had thrown Ben through the plate glass windows of the bakery, and since Ben had last seen you.
He didn't understand why you hadn't let him take you back to the apartment and why it was that you had to leave. Ben hadn't liked the feeling that stabbed him in the chest when you turned your back on him and ran away. He'd felt the urge to comfort you the way he'd watched Hughie do for Annie in the car a week ago, but you hadn't let him.
Instead all he'd done is stood there and watched you run, still covered in dust, rubble, and blood. Worse was you hadn't let him check you for injuries and Ben hated the thought that you were hurt somewhere and he didn't know where you were.
You were so much more fragile than he was. He was realizing that more every day, was acutely aware of it after everything that happened with Elijah. Honestly, sitting there in the hospital with you laying there asleep with nothing that he could do, but wait for you to wake up had been agony. Not to mention that looking at the bruises around your throat, over your eye, and the bright green cast only made him feel worse. He'd never felt so helpless in his entire life and he hated it. Because Ben wasn't some helpless damsel in distress, he was a man and a man shouldn't wait on anyone or feel out of control, or at least, that's what he told himself.
Ben hears someone walk down the hallway outside the apartment and he perks up to listen, hoping that it's you finally coming home. Ben's mind stutters on the word "home." He'd lived many places in his life, apartments that felt more like way-stations, and the drafty cold mansion back in Philadelphia where he grew up, but neither felt like home. And although he hated how small your apartment was, it was the first place that Ben liked living in. He was starting to understand the word home.
But the feet keep moving past the apartment and Ben sinks into the couch cushions. Even Bean seems to be disappointed. "It's alright buddy." Ben mutters. "She'll come back."
But he wasn't sure.
Ben also wasn't used to feeling this way. It was close to the way that he felt when he went to Boston and was sitting in that damn hotel room waiting for something to happen and he still didn't understand what it meant. He didn't understand why he couldn't stand it that you weren't back yet. It made him feel like a woman waiting for her husband to get home from work when he told her that he was "running late." He'd tried to distract himself by looking at some possible prospects on Tinder, but just like the week after you'd come home from the hospital and just like the date he had in Boston, no one held any appeal.
His mind was awake and roaming around, pacing back and forth. The blunt was supposed to help, but it hadn't.
His phone chirps and Ben picks it up to look at the screen, but it's not you, it's Jake.
Jake: I know that I'm not your favorite person, but thank you for what you did.
Ben huffs and turns his phone face down on the couch once more. "What a fucking pussy."
When you left Ben had realized that Jake was still inside the building and as much as he wanted race after you, he understood that you'd be even more upset if you'd killed Jake. So Ben had tromped back through the building and found him trapped beneath some rubble. Jake was okay, just unconscious, but Ben had carried him out and put him on the sidewalk before he high tailed it out of there. The last thing that he wanted was to be caught with a shredded body outside a ruined building.
I didn't do it for him. I did it for her. Ben thinks to himself, looking down at the text message.
As much as he hated the thought of saving your future boyfriend, he didn't want to see what it did to you if you found out that you killed Jake, so he'd done it to avoid watching you cry again.
Ben didn't understand why he hated watching you cry.
Women cry. They're damn emotional all the time. He tries to reason with himself taking a puff from the blunt pinched between his thumb and forefinger. And she fucking cries way too much.
The image of you crying outside of the shop in the wake of everything that happened pricks something under his ribcage. Fuck.
Ben didn't feel remorse for what happened, well, the only thing he regretted was not getting there sooner and getting to fuck Darren up himself. When Diana had called him to tell him that Darren was coming, Ben had practically ripped the apartment door off in his haste to get back to you. He hadn’t wanted to leave you at the plant shop, but Butcher had told Ben, that he had a possible location for Darren, but it came up empty and Ben had been at Butcher's apartment chewing him out for sending him on a fucking wild goose chase.
It only made Ben more angry to allow Darren to speak to you, but he was trying to let you handle it even though he wanted to handle him. But it had brought him an unholy amount of joy to throw Darren in front of that minivan and to watch that creature tear him apart while the final whitish blue pulses of electricity jumped and crackled down the street making the streetlights shower sparks everywhere.
But Ben was more upset that Darren had been able to land a few hits on you before you killed him.
Ben remembered the giant lizard that crawled out of what was left of "Please Don't Die" and felt his lips quirk up into a smile. As much as he hated the entire situation, Ben couldn't help but feel a little surge of pride at what you'd done to your brother. He'd never seen you look so powerful standing there in the street, your eyes glowing a brilliant green, arms outstretched, and the ground trembling around you as the world begged to be unleashed.
Of course he'd been just as surprised as you were at the fact that you'd healed your broken arm. He wasn't sure if you'd noticed it yet, but you looked different too. There weren't as many lines on your face and your hair was more springy, the few silver hairs that Ben had noticed in passing were no longer there.
He wasn't sure what that meant, but there was something that felt suspiciously like hope tingling in his stomach, hope that you weren't as fragile anymore and hope that it meant you wouldn't die.
When Diana had told Ben that her husband had died, he saw the pain in her eyes when she said it, saw her relieving the memory, and for some reason as soon as she said that he was dead, the first thing Ben thought about was you. Ben hadn't considered his inability to age as much in the past, hadn't cared about outliving anyone before. Seeing Countess as an older woman had made him more aware of it. Looking at the woman who he once thought he loved, had showed him what that was like. Not that he had a problem with daring older women, Ben always thought that women really did get better with age, but it was what came next that Ben wasn't fond of.
And for some reason thinking that one day he'd wake up and see the marks of age on your face or one day he'd wake up and he wouldn't be able to annoy you or hear you yell at him made his chest tight.
Ben takes another hit of his blunt. The longer he sat there the more then unnatural feeling stirred in the pit of his stomach, thrumming through his veins, the feeling that he was trying to avoid. He thought that the joint would calm him down, but he found himself jumping at every creak and footstep in the apartment building, perking up each time and hoping that it was you coming home.
He didn't know where you were. You hadn't answered any of his texts or calls and Ben was ashamed at how many times that he had tried to call you.
Get a fucking grip. He'd thought to himself when he typed out another text message to send you, stopping himself from sending it.
But he'd been so desperate to hear from you that he'd actually gone to talk to Annie who seemed upset that she couldn't get ahold of you either. When Hughie and Annie had seen how upset Ben had been, Hughie had laid his hand on Ben's arm and told him not to worry. Ben had yelled at him that he "wasn't fucking worried and to mind his own business" and had shaken off Hughie's comforting hand before stomping out of the shared apartment.
No one else seemed to be as concerned about finding you. Butcher, MM, and Frenchie were all deeply involved in trying to figure out the cover-up for what happened outside the plant shop. By some miracle no one had caught a picture of your face, but there was little they could do about Darren's body that had been strewn across the street. Annie was having to deal with the repercussions at work, trying to handle what the news was calling a "super villain threat."
Personally, Ben thought that since they froze Homelander, the Seven looked weak and Ben believed that the superhero team that represented America shouldn't look weak. Of course before Ben had also thought that they looked like a bunch of pussies and again felt himself sink deeper into the couch when he thought about what his supposed son had become.
He shakes off the feelings he has about it and his thoughts turn back inevitably to you.
Ben wasn't used to thinking about someone as much as he thought of you, but each time he settled back into the apartment and you weren't there he was hyperaware of how quiet it was.
Maybe I should call Diana. She might know where she is.
As soon as Ben thinks that, his phone begins to ring, but Ben doesn't bother to look at who it is before he answers it. 
"Hello?" Ben huffs out a breath of smoke that hangs in the air in front of his face, catching in the bluish light coming from the television.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" The voice on the other side of the line yells at him.
"Di?"
"Yes it's me. Who did you think it was? Santa Clause?" Your grandmother snarks.
"Why are you calling me and why the fuck are you so mad? What did I do?" Ben answers slightly annoyed.
As much as you got under his skin, your grandmother had been the same way. He actually thought that it was amusing that even before he figured out that she was your grandmother that he had often compared you to her in his mind. You had the same mannerisms, the same defiant and stubborn attitude that drove Ben up the wall, and you were just as beautiful as she was.
Ben was okay with admitting that he was attracted to you. To him that felt normal, it was the other feelings that he was conflicted about, the ones that he'd never felt before stirring in his chest that made him feel "too emotional" and "woman-like."
Truthfully, Ben was sure that if your grandmother had given him a shot that maybe he would have felt that way about her too. She was the only person that Ben actually trusted in the 80's, the only person that was brave enough to call him out on all his shit. You did that now. But he liked her husband also, so Ben was content with letting her go. He liked how happy that Henry, your grandfather, had made her. He knew that she wasn't happy as a supe and seeing her so happy and in love made Ben feel something that was close to happiness.
And it was seeing the way the two of them were together made Ben wonder if what he had with Countess was the same thing. Because he did have feelings about her that were different, but each time he went to visit Diana and saw your father playing on her lap he felt that there was something missing in his life.
It was the same way that he thought something was missing when you weren't in the apartment, but Ben hadn't realized that yet.
"Because I don't understand what the hell you're doing!" Diana replies and Ben honestly doesn't know why she's angry with him.
"About what?"
"My granddaughter."
Ben sits up the blunt in his fingertips forgotten. "Is she there with you?"
"Yes." Her voice softens for a moment.
Ben relaxes and leans back onto the couch, sighing in relief. "Good.  That's good." Relief swelled in his chest when he thought about you staying with her, safe.
That's what she meant when she said that she wanted to go home. Home is with her grandmother. Ben stopped the next thought before he could go there.
The thought that home wasn't with him.
Ben was trying not to think about that or think about you hating him. He didn't think you did, well, didn't think you did anymore. At first it really was touch and go, but now he was almost eighty percent sure after you'd told him more than once that you weren't afraid of him and didn’t hate him that you sometimes wanted him around.
"No, not good."
"What do you mean? Is she okay?" Ben's grip on the phone tightens so hard that he's sure that he hears the screen cracking.
"No."
"What happened?" Ben's voice is a growl, the feelings of relief evaporating as soon as they had begun to bloom in his chest. He mentally calculated how long it would take him to get to you.
"Her entire life fucking fell apart and where are you? Not here!"
Oh. Ben relaxed a little bit.
"I don't need to be there." He says on an exhale of smoke.
"Yes you do!" Diana presses.
"No, I don't. She a big girl she doesn't need me there, she's-" Ben takes a puff from the joint.
“If you were any denser you’d be a Bundt cake Benjamin!” She says exasperated.
"What the fuck are you talking about doll? I am not-"
“Let me guess." She interrupts and Ben can imagine her tapping her foot. He hated when she did that. "You’re moping around smoking a blunt on the couch probably with a glass of something that you're hoping to numb whatever the hell it is you're feeling."
Ben's eyes shift to the bottle of whiskey on the coffee table that he hadn't touched in a few minutes.
“I’m not fucking moping and stop spying on me!” He snaps back at Diana.
He hated how well she knew him. She was his best friend in the 80's through all the shit, she had seen him at his worst and at his best too many times to count.
“I don’t have to use my powers to know what you’re doing. I know you Ben.”
"Sorry to disappoint you sweetheart.” Ben grits his teeth, temper flaring hot. “But if you know me as well as you fucking say you do then you then you know that this is-“
“You avoiding your feelings by acting aloof and brooding like a fucked up version of Mr. Darcy.” She interrupts.
She certainly hasn't changed.
“I am not avoiding-“
“She needs you here Ben.” Diana stamps her foot, the same way you do when Ben pisses you off, and Ben can hear it.
“She doesn’t need me! She said that she wanted to go home, that she didn’t want to be here with me! I tried to-“ Ben shouts back standing up. It was the exact thing that he'd been thinking for the past twenty four hours, that you didn’t need him and that you didn't want to be any where near him.
That last thought made an uncomfortable sensation prickle in his gut when he thought it, because all it did was remind him of how you acted when the two of you first met, when you didn't want him to live with you and tried your darndest to make him go away.
He didn’t want to and he wasn't sure why that was.
“Try harder.” Diana interrupts him again and frankly it was pissing him off.
Ben clenches his jaw. “I think that you’ve confused me with someone else baby.”
“Don’t you 'baby' me Benjamin! We both know that you’re doing what you always do when things get hard for you.”
“And what’s that?”
“You pretend not to care and shut out everyone who tries to care for you. Not to mention you drown yourself in drugs, booze, and women.”
“She doesn’t care about me!” He spits.
“She does!” Diana snaps back. “And believe it or not she needs you here and she wants you here.”
"But-"
"Ben please." It was the first time that he'd heard Diana sound softer and almost pleading since the conversation started. "Don't do this to her. She's worth more than Countess and all those other women you've fallen into bed with."
"Do you really think I don't know that?" He roars. The answer surprises himself. "Do you think I don't know that she's different?"
Wait what?
"If you know that, then why aren't you here?"
He hesitates.
Everything you said to him the night of the party comes roaring back. You looking beautiful in a dress that made his throat tight, and you telling him that you just wanted to be friends and that you understood that he wasn't the type of guy to have relationships. He didn't understand why it stung a bit when you said that, but it had.
Ben thinks about the week that the two of you spent together after Diana went home, when he tried his best to take care of you, distract you from everything that happened with his movies, and would sit with you and try to make you laugh. He'd never wanted to take care of someone before.
Not to mention he kind of liked the way you laughed. He wouldn’t admit that to anyone, but each time you did, it made him want to laugh too. That had never happened to him before. But he wanted to make you laugh to forget everything that happened with Elijah. His fist clenches when he thinks of exactly what Elijah tried to do to you and it makes him feel so mad that he feels close to spontaneously combusting. Ben might not be the best role model when it came to women, but he couldn’t imagine the type of man who would force himself on someone else.
It had made him angry when he thought that you were suggesting that he would try something when he first moved in, because he wasn't that type of man.
Ben was trying to be better for you. He wasn't admitting that, but he really was trying to be better. He didn't understand why. You'd told him countless times that you didn’t want to be with him, that you wanted to be with someone else like Jake.
Ben frowns when he thinks about the man he'd pulled from the rubble of the shop. And again thinks to himself that you should be with someone different, someone who was a supe and could understand you. Ben had seen how difficult it was for Diana when she was keeping her supe life a secret from your grandfather and he didn't want you to have to do that with someone.
"Because I'm not-" Ben begins to say, but he holds his tongue. It was too honest, too raw, too unlike him to admit this to anyone.
Because I'm not this guy. Because I'm not the one she wants. Because I'm not some knight on a white horse. Because she's everything right with the world and I'm just a fucking asshole who sleeps on her couch.
"Ben." Diana breathes and he can practically hear her pinching the bridge of her nose. "In all the years I've known you, you've never done what you did for her with anyone else. You carried her out of that warehouse, you stayed with her in the hospital even after she woke up, you took care of her when she came home, you protected her from Darren. You can't ignore all those things."
"I'm not ignoring them. She's my friend." The word sours in his mouth as he says it. "And she would have done the same thing for me." He knew it was true.
She's a good person and she wouldn't let me chase her away if any of that shit happened to me and I told her to leave me alone.
"Yes she would. Because she cares about you." Diana sighs.
"She doesn't."
"Why don't you believe me?"
"Because she's told me what she wants!" Ben shouts so loudly he can feel the room shaking. "She wants to be friends-“
"Because she doesn't think that you want a relationship you nitwit!"
"I don't." Ben spits the words before he can stop them, but as he does something tightens at the base of his throat.
"How is it that it's been forty fucking years and you're still able to dance on the grave of my last nerve?"
Ben chuckles. "I missed you too sweetheart."
She sighs into the phone again making it crackle in Ben's ear. "She needs you.” Diana repeats. “And I think you need her too.”
His temper was flaring again, the thoughts that his father pressed into him surging up before he can stop the words. “I don’t need anyone. I’m Sol-“
“If you say that you’re Soldier Boy, I’m going to reach through this phone and slap you silly.” She snaps. “And you do need her, but you’re still just too stubborn to admit it.”
“I-“
“Ben I know that everything that happened with Countess was fucked up, but my granddaughter she-“ Diana pauses before she changes the thought.  “You say that you know she’s different, but right now you’re treating her the same way you treat all those other women.”
“I’m not-“
“My granddaughter has decided you’re important to her and once that’s happened it’s hard to make her let go. You saw the way she was with Darren and that guy was a manipulative asshole. Imagine what she thinks of you.”
“I-“
“Stop making excuses!”
“You didn’t even hear what I was going to say!” Ben shouts.
“And I don’t need to! Think what you want Ben but if you’d stop acting so stubborn and so ridiculously blind to what’s right in front of you. I promise that what comes next is worth the risk.”
“Don’t go all fucking mystical on me doll.”
“And don’t go all macho- no feelings asshole on me! So stop being so damn stubborn, get on a plane and get your ass here.” She retorts. “Don’t fuck this up Benjamin because if you do I’ll fuck you up.”
The line goes dead.
Ben sat there for a minute in the silence still holding the phone up to his ear, listening to what your grandmother said to him ring around in his head for a second.
No one ever spoke to him that way. In fact, Ben had never allowed anyone to speak to him the way that she did, well, not until you came along. You reminded him so much of her that it was astounding and he wasn't going to admit that maybe it's why he liked being around you so much.
Ben frowns at what Diana said, thinking about the unusual feelings that were swirling in the pit of his stomach. He felt wrong and the feelings were odd for him. He hadn't felt anything remotely like this ever in his life, not even for Countess.
And although Ben refused to be afraid of anything, the feelings he was having scared him. He didn’t understand and he wasn't sure that he wanted to. He wasn't sure that he wanted to see where this ended up. He felt like he was in too deep.
As much as he wanted to go to you like Diana ordered him to, he wasn't sure that he should. Something was holding him back, digging it's heels in and refusing to budge.
But why do I feel like-
His phone rings and he doesn't look at the caller ID when he picks up, expecting it to be Diana again, yelling at him.
"Di I-"
But it's not Diana.
"Hello Ben. It's nice to hear your voice again." The familiar voice says, sounding calm and collected.
"What the fuck do you want?" Ben snarls.
 "I thought it was time the two of us had a chat.”
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A/N: At this point Diana is really just trying to give both Ben and the reader the kick in the pants they need. And yes I know another cliffhanger, but you know you love it. 🤭😉 We are quickly reaching the end of this series, but that means the confession scene is coming and I am so excited about it!!
As always thank you so much for reading! Reblogs, likes, and comments are not required, but are always appreciated. I love hearing what y'all think! If you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series let me know. 😊
Taglist:
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lulublack90 · 2 days ago
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Prompt 12 - Jealous
@jegulus-microfic November 12, Word count 746
Previous part First part
James jumped out of his car before any of the others could even unbuckle their seatbelts and opened Regulus’s door for him. Regulus looked up at him a bit bewildered, but took his hand anyway and let James guide him out of the car. 
“How come you never do that for me?” Remus pouted as he walked around the car to where Sirius stood waiting.
“Because of what I let you do to me this morning,” Sirius quipped, raising his brow, daring Remus to keep going as he would definitely describe every moment in minute detail. He’d done it before and would feel no shame in recounting their exploits in front of his brother. Remus smartly kept his mouth shut, and they headed into the gallery silently. 
James was surprised how many people were milling around the exhibits and just how large the art show actually was. There were so many artists showcasing their work. 
“Where’s yours?” He asked Regulus as they followed the crowd to the first display. 
“Back right,” Regulus told him, pointing in the right direction. James started to walk that way, but Regulus tugged his hand to stop him. “No, we have to look at everybody’s. We can’t just go straight to mine,” Regulus muttered quickly. 
“Why not?” James questioned. “I want to see yours,” Regulus’s cheeks turned pink as he ducked his head. 
“I need a few minutes to prepare myself for going over there,” Regulus admitted, clearly nervous about how James would react.
“Let’s go look at some art then,” James said, kissing the back of Regulus’s hand and following after Sirius and Remus. “Thank you for telling me what you needed, love. You can always do that, and I’ll respect it every time,” He didn’t need to look down to know how deep the red was that coloured Regulus’s cheeks now, he could quite happily picture it in his head.
They caught up with Sirius and Remus, the former having a heated discussion with Remus in front of the artist about his piece. 
“I just don’t get it,” Sirius was saying. “I mean, it’s just a tennis ball,” Remus sighed. 
“It’s modern art; the tennis ball represents the way that commercialism has changed the way sports are viewed,”
“It represents a game of fetch,” Sirius retorted, much to the artist's ire. Remus hurriedly moved Sirius along to a painting of a park. “See, Remus, there’s a dog playing fetch with a tennis ball,” He said loudly as they took in the work. 
“I changed my mind,” Regulus said quietly into James’s ear. “I can not follow him around here, let's just go see my stuff,” James beamed down at him. 
“Lead the way, love,” 
Regulus led them all the way to the back of the hall and stopped in front of ‘Burk with a Nana’. “Wait!” James exclaimed. “They let you display it with that name?!” Regulus shrugged. 
“Art,” He said simply, as a means of explanation. “As long as it isn’t too sweary, they don’t mind.” 
James moved with Regulus, looking at each piece. Regulus seemed to lean towards painting, but there were charcoal sketches, clay sculptures and a cat made from intricately twisted gold-coloured wire. James was in awe of Regulus and was about to say so when he spotted him chatting with a tall, dirty-blonde-haired man. He felt suddenly quite jealous, an emotion he wasn’t used to feeling at the easy way they were conversing and the smile on Regulus’s face. He strode over there, putting a possessive arm around Regulus and waited to be introduced. 
“James, this is Evan. Our parents know each other. Evan, this is James, my, er, my…”
“Boyfriend,” James provided helpfully. To be fair to Regulus, they hadn’t discussed labels, but, by the pleased look on Regulus’s face, he quite liked this one. Evan’s eyebrows shot up his face in surprise. 
“Oh, wow,” He said. “Erm, wow, Regulus, that’s so good,” His face softened. “I’m so happy for you. I’m here with my boyfriend, actually. I think you know him. Oh, look, here he is now. Darling, look who it is,” A slim-built man in an expensive-looking suit strode over to their little group, his dark brown hair slicked back expertly, showing off the sparking diamond earring, glinting off the light as he neared them. James felt Regulus still at his side. 
“Barty,” Regulus breathed out when the man stopped before them, looking shocked at who Evan was talking to. 
“Reggie?” 
Next part
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givekennyabreak · 3 days ago
Text
Irreplaceable. (Kenny Liu x gn!reader)
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Summary: A cop arrived along with Tabitha, and she thinks she owns the place; you think it's time to teach her how to be humble.
Rating: T
Warnings: whole lotta cursing, canon-compliant violence, spoilers for S3E8 of From, survivor's guilt, mourning, Acosta slander, reader is jealous but for a good reason, mentions of blood, mentions of gun. Acosta is her own warning.
Word count: 2.15k
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Tabitha was back.
She went through the tree, got into a lighthouse, went outside and wound up back in town. She was hurt - scared, you could see the way she looked around with wide eyes at every waking moment.
You talked to her once; it didn't go far, though, as Jim arrived a couple minutes after you finally got the poor woman alone, telling you whatever went on in their life wasn't any of your business.
You flipped him off.
"If you ever need to talk," you told Tabitha, eyes as gentle as possible. "I'm at the station."
Not only did Tabitha come back, she brought in Victor's father with her (by accident, she said. Of course.). Henry, he said his name was, was a gentle man through and through. You could see how much he cared about Victor - the way he tried his best to be patient and reconnect with his son.
He never berated the man, listened to whatever he said with the utmost patience and always tried to remain calm, although you're all only human - he panics a few times, too.
He went to the goddamn caves with Victor.
If that isn’t love, you don’t know what is.
Victor, your first friend in this hellspace; one of the four people you trusted with your life - the other three, obviously, were Boyd, Donna, and Kenny.
The man was a gentle, misunderstood soul. If anyone asked you who was the person who wanted to leave this place the most, out of everyone, Victor would be your answer. He was used to it, yes - but he didn't like the place.
He was tired.
You were tired.
That's why you tried to help him as much as possible.
(Victor told you how he tried to remember what happened with Christopher and the townspeople at the beginning, but it didn't work - he was going to see Sara.
"Does it have to be her? Do we have to do this?"
"Yes."
"Dude, c’mon. She-"
"I know. But it’s gonna get scary, and she’s the scariest person in town."
You blinked up at him. He blinked back.
You sighed.
"Fine. But I'm taking a knife with me.")
Yet, there was a third party who got in town with the two good parts; and, as all is never well in this place, the woman was an absolute menace.
Acosta was her name - surname? Who knows -, a policewoman who refused to change out of her uniform, going around asking people invasive shit and managing to piss you off more times than you can count by berating Boyd, of all people.
Her last stunt was to come up to the station as you were talking to the sheriff about the kinds of food you managed to find with the last group of people who went foraging, demanding him to give her gun back.
She did so without even acknowledging your presence, trading insults back and forth while you watched the scene, flabbergasted; Boyd, tired of her shit, actually gave it back to her without the ammunition (this is why you trusted him so much), and she walked out of the station, without as much as a glance towards you.
"Am I invisible?"
Boyd sighed. "To her? Most people are."
And then - there went your last straw.
Just as you arrived at the diner, ready to give your boyfriend a tight, much needed hug, you caught sight of a blonde ponytail and blue uniform.
"Oh, hell no."
You swung open the inner door, and walked up to the stools just as Kenny poured hot water into a mug.
"Yeah, they… they do that sometimes." He said, as the jukebox played by itself (again.).
Acosta looked at him - really looked at him. “Is that something else you get comfortable with?” A pause. “Look, thanks for the tea.”
He looked down at the mug. “Uh, you didn't even...”
She stood up, body almost colliding with yours. “Excuse me.”
And then, Kenny looked up, eyes locking with yours. He brightened up immediately - his smile widened, and he put the pot back in its place, just to beckon you over with his free hands.
"Good morning, my love." You said, ducking under the opening to the back of the counter. When you straightened up, your boyfriend was already by your side, arms wrapped around your shoulders, drinking in your presence.
The blonde turned around, now staring at you, with furrowed brows and a scowl on her face.
“Mornin’.” He swooped down, lips connecting with yours in a chaste kiss. A sigh left your body, arms encasing around his shoulders, and you heard a scoff sound from behind, followed by the door opening and closing.
You stayed there for a couple of minutes, in each other’s arms, just enjoying the peace and quiet – the rarest thing to happen when in town. You nosed at Kenny’s throat and he inhaled deeply, red creeping up the side of his neck.
“I missed you.” You whispered. He stayed silent for a few seconds, squeezing you tighter.
“You saw me last night.”
You could hear the smile in his voice; this is it, you thought. This is a good change.
Kenny was hurting.
Kenny was mourning.
But the town – the people, didn’t give him the time he needed to go through this, so the best thing you could do to not see him fade away was stay by his side and not let him wither.
(You missed Tian-Chen, too.
She treated you like her own. She loved you, and you loved her.
She told you to stay with Jade and Victor that night.
You shouldn’t have.)
“It’s a few hours too much, still.” You replied, grinning.
Kenny let go of the embrace first, in favor of throwing away the – now – cold tea. "You're veeeery cheesy."
"This is how you love me, anyways."
"Yeah." He sighed, leaning back onto the counter, arms open again. He didn't need to ask - you gladly embraced him, arms around his waist this time, as he leaned down and hid his face near your collarbone.
"I do."
You stayed there for God knows how long, fingers carding through Kenny's soft, thick hair; humming a song you knew he loved, whispering about how your mornings went, and the dreams you had.
You both had given up on the house after Tian-Chen passed away, and Jim permeated the place with his presence (although you knew he meant no harm, the place was suffocating). Kenny moved into colony house, while you stayed at the station with Boyd. Victor would have no qualms about you moving there with him, seeing as he had the safest room in that place, but Henry was there with him, and you didn't mean to intrude.
The both of you left the diner together, hand-in-hand, ready to face the day ahead.
Shortly after, Boyd assigned you with the task of helping him around - there were more people now, and he could use some help figuring shit out. Ellis was panicking - something happened with Fatima -, and the man wanted to help his kid, so you left to do some of his own chores.
Night came.
You slept in the "archive room", a little nook used to store boxes in the station; Boyd had helped you get a bed in there, and that was good enough. There was one little window on the upper side of the room, and, even though you kept it tightly shut (you nailed it, as a precaution), the whispers and giggles still seeped into the space and made it harder for you to sleep.
The sun rose with a golden hue. The orange glow shone through the clear glass, straight onto your face; with a groan, you rose up from the mattress, stretching as your body slowly woke up.
Another day where you got up, did your shit and hoped for the best - except this time, there wasn't even any hope to begin with.
"Tillie's dead." Boyd told you as you got to colony house, a few minutes after him. "We don't know who did it, but it wasn't a creature."
Ellis fidgeted beside his dad; it looked like he wanted to say something, but held himself back.
"You okay, Ellis?" You asked, with furrowed brows. "Is Fatima okay?"
Ellis inhaled sharply. Boyd glanced at him, and back at you.
"She's fine." The young man replied, nodding his head. "Aside from the nausea, and the, uh. The other stuff."
The ultrasound issue.
"Oh. Make sure she's safe, okay?" You said, nodding at the sheriff. "'m going in."
Boyd shook his head no.
"Wait here, please. Kenny and Acosta are inside, questioning the folks."
A burning feeling made its way up the back of your neck, up to your cheeks and forehead - although it was commonly associated with red, you knew what this was: green.
Jealousy.
Now, you wouldn't consider yourself a jealous person in any way, no; but the lingering glances, the manner in which she scoffed with no shame at your affection, how she thought she was the crispiest fucking fry of the batch?
Oh, fuck no.
Boyd and Ellis rushed away while you steeped in your own anger. Not long after, you heard two sets of footsteps walk out of the house, and there they actually were - your boyfriend, and the blue-uniform menace.
Kenny had a troubled look on his face while Acosta - what the fuck was her name, again? - yapped away with no regard to his feelings; obviously, no one would walk on eggshells here when it came to other people's feelings, but this was too much.
"Was what that guy said about Sara and your dad true?"
Enough is enough.
"It's not that simple."
You trailed off behind the duo, your own brows furrowed and fists tightly closed as you breathed in and out slowly.
Do not fight her. Do not throw fists. Do not. Refrain.
"Okay, you didn't think it was worth mentioning the girl that already murdered two people?"
"Look, it's just, uh, she's different now, and Boyd trusts her."
"Who gives a shit what Boyd thinks, okay?"
"Hey!"
They stopped at your shout, turning around. Turns out you were closer than it seemed; four steps were all it took for you to walk up to her stupid face and swing a fist straight to her jaw.
Kenny yelped, rushing to your side as Acosta doubled over, hand cradling her face; wild, blue eyes stared into your own as she straightened up, raising her own fists. Your boyfriend tried to step in, but you walked around, pushing him behind your own body.
"Come on, hit me." You said, ready for a blow. She hesitated, and then - you spoke up. "You're walking around like you own this place. As if you're mightier than anyone who has been stuck here."
Kenny moved, but you lifted up your hand, placing it on his chest. "Hun, please. Sit this one out."
Acosta scoffed. You faced her, seeing the way she looked between you and Kenny.
"Yeah, we met here. Yes, we fell in love here, we got together here. Yes, this has become our routine. Do you think we wanted to be here? You think we chose to stay?" Her eyes softened. "No, we don't. But we're trying our fucking best to stay alive and sane, because that way, we can think and figure out how to escape."
Your fists shook, angry tears threatening to fall.
"You have no idea what it feels like to witness the people we love wither away and get lured in by those fucks by night. So, at least, try to be a little more considerate of these people's feelings, won't you?"
Kenny took one of your closed fists in his own hand, slowly opening it and lacing your fingers together.
"That way, you might be able to actually help someone." You finished, staring at her bruising jaw. "Sorry I punched you."
Acosta swallowed deeply, glancing between yourself and Kenny.
"I never thought about that." She said, eyes finally settling on your own. "I understand. Apology accepted."
Kenny squeezed your hand, leaning down to whisper in your ear.
"Well, that's better than nothing."
You held in a snort, bumping your shoulders together.
"Are you going to come with us?" She asked, tilting her head towards the forest.
You nodded your head. "Yeah. What did you guys find out?"
Just as she opened her mouth to answer, a shrill yell echoed through the place.
"Help!"
Ethan.
Everyone looked towards the boy, as Kenny rushed to ask him what happened.
Acosta looked at you, and nodded; the both of you ran, and you sure fucking hoped this was the beginning of a good teamwork.
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rodanhoax · 23 hours ago
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Jaune: *Wielding the relic of destruction* It's over Pyrrha! Give me back my son!
Pyrrha: Don't you mean, "our" son?
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Jaune: Pyrrha... y-you look so different.
Pyrrha: I did a little something with my hair. And my lips.
Jaune: Are those thigh highs?
Pyrrha: So you noticed those too?
Ironwood: Okay Jaune, take the shot.
Pyrrha: What do you think of them?
Jaune: I uh... um-
Ironwood: She's standing right there, Jaune. Take the shot.
Pyrrha: Do you like my open bust dress~?
Jaune: Oh god yeah.
Qrow: What the hell is wrong with you?!
Port: Blast this harpy!
Jaune: I'm sorry guys, b-but I cant.
Port: The shrew has been forged from brimstone.
Qrow: Translation?
Ironwood: He's saying she's an evil clone.
Jaune: I hear ya. Counterpoint:
Jaune: She's really hot.
Qrow: Damn it Arc!
Port: Reject women! Embrace huntsmanship!
Ironwood: Can't you see how evil she is?!
Pyrrha: I'm going for the goth girlfriend look.
Jaune: Okay guys, I know she's an evil clone... But, she is the mother of my child. To be honest, this situation is confusing as hell for me. I... I'm tapping out.
Qrow: Tapping out?
Ironwood: You're a huntsman, you can't tap out.
Jaune: Dude, I'm tapping out.
Port: What would Ozpin think of this treason?
Jaune: The professor?
-Flashback-
Ozpin: You're like a son to me Jaune, I trust you with my very life. I want you to know that I keep a gun in hidden inside my cane. It's always with me Jaune. I sleep with it. I dream of it. You can never be too careful around these students-
Jaune: It's not working, he... keeps talking about guns.
Ironwood: Guns?
Jaune: Yeah.
Qrow: That doesn't sound right.
Pyrrha: Are you sure this isn't his evil clone?
Jaune: He kind of hinted it was for... self defense?
Port: Guns are nothing before my axe!
Qrow: Isn't your axe also a gun?
Port: Silence!
Ironwood: You don't think the professor actually used it do you?
Jaune: Do I think the professor shot someone? No, of course not. That's like totally ridiculous. Besides, we would have heard about it.
Pyrrha: He could have just wiped your memories.
Jaune: What?
Pyrrha: He could have shot someone then wiped everyone's memories about the event. With his magic it would have been easy for him.
Jaune: This is a terrifying thought.
Ironwood: Don't listen to her Jaune!
Pyrrha: Join me Jaune. The Grimm Queen needs a king.
Jaune: Not gonna lie, Grimm Queen is kind of weird, but i'm in.
Port: Step away from her you fool!
Jaune: I'm kind of bricked up at the moment.
Qrow: Don't worry Arc, I know this ain't easy. That's why I offer myself... as a sacrifice. Do what you want to me Pyrrha, make me your freaky sex puppet for all I care. Just let Arc go!
Port: What a noble gesture!
Ironwood: He is truly the best of us.
Qrow: Tie me up. Slap me. Step on me! It's alright, my ego ain't that big. Just leave the kid out of this!
Jaune: I know what you're doing.
Qrow: You ain't gotta thank me Jaune. Y'know... I really shoulda said this sooner, but... but you're like a brother to me!
Jaune: You've always had a thing for her.
Qrow: Oz would've been proud of ya, kid. I know I sure as hell am.
Jaune: You can't just live out your sick fantasies with my fake goth girlfriend!
Port: Your words can no longer reach him... His heart is set.
Ironwood: We shall remember you, Qrow... We shall remember you.
Qrow: So Pyrrha... How ya wanna do this? Should I take off the cape now, or-
Pyrrha: Sorry, Qrow, but you're a little old for my taste. Not to mention a furry.
Qrow: Furries deserve love!
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ribbonsncherries · 2 days ago
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I have a request if you are interested? :)
A teen!dad jess. He has a best friend from New York (she can have a name or it can be Y/N, you can choose) (they are endgame, jess never had feelings for Rory but she has feelings for Jess, it won't go anywhere) Jess and his best friend have a kid, they co-parent (whether they are dating already or in the future is up to you) Jess gets sent to Stars Hallow, she ends up moving to stars Hallow to, to be close to Jess and so their kid can be with him too (she is emancipated, plus Jess knows she's coming because they keep in contact) if anyone reading this would like to turn this into an actual story, I'm totally down for reading it :) if you choose this request, I look forward to reading it. Thank you!!
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ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི₊ ⊹𝓗𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓸 𝓢𝓽𝓪𝓻𝓼 𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀!˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥
A/N: Of course! I’ve had the biggest crush on Jess since I was little. He really opened my eyes to bad boys lol. But this is my first story request, so I was super excited I literally made a whole timeline of what happened which would've taken way too much time to publish so I hope you enjoy this mini one shot! 
Summary: Jess Mariano became a teen dad at 16 and a year later is now struggling to find a place in Stars Hollow to keep his son and girlfriend safe and close. Eventually, the Gilmores come to the rescue! 
Warnings: Nothing but fluff :)
Divider credits:
@anitalenia @cafekitsune
GIF Credits:
@luke-danes
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REBLOGS AND LIKES ARE ALWAYS APPRECIATED!
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It started as a game. Just a stupid game of 7 minutes in heaven at a house party. It turned into a friends-with-benefits deal cause Y/N and Jess were too stupidly shy to express their feelings yet the sex was enough for both of them. They were dumb hormonal teenagers. But when Y/N needed to go to the bathroom more, her craving for lemonade increased, and her period was late. The two faint lines appeared boldly. When she told Jess his heart sank. They both didn’t know how to feel, but when talk of abortion came for the both of them from a flyer they didn’t have the heart to do it. So they chose to have the baby even though both were scared shitless. When Y/N’s parents found out it was even worse, they told her they would not take over anything. Everything was up to Y/N and Jess, They would not keep or take care of the baby unless she went to school or got a job. Jess’ mother however was displeased. She was a bit afraid her son would follow the path his father did, to abandon Y/N and start something new with another woman and never hear from him again. But as Jess began working more and more to help financially his mother’s worries lessened, Y/N however continued her studies at home getting money from Jess every day to prepare for the arrival of their baby. So when their baby boy Liam finally came after 9 months it was like hot potato. Liam was passed back and forth between the both of them, although both Jess and Y/N liked each other it was hard to see each other so often from work and school. But after a year Jess was shipped off to Stars Hollow, Connecticut to be with his uncle because of his lack of effort in school. So Y/N and Jess decided it would be best for the both of them to make this work and go together. But there were some problems with Luke.
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“No,” Luke said as he began making coffee. Jess had his arms in the air and shrugged with a scoff. “Luke, it’s my girlfriend and my kid. I can’t be away from my kid.” Luke looked him up and down “You shouldn’t have been doing that tango kid, 'cause I'm not having a puking and crying kid in my already cramped-up apartment. Jess, I'm sorry but we don’t have space and even if we did your school is one of the priorities along with taking care of both of them.” Lorelai came into the diner like always and sat in the barstool. “Hey! Mr Lukey Danes, Coffee for your very special and loyal customer pretty please with a little cherry on top,” she said snapping her fingers in a joking manner. “Lorelai not now.” Luke scoffed. “What’s going on? What's with the attitude between you men? Did he steal your super secret Krabby patty formula or something?” she asked. Jess rolled his eyes as he went upstairs. Luke grabbed a mug and poured coffee in it “Jess wants to bring his girlfriend and kid to Stars Hollow. But we can’t.” he said simply. Lorelai’s smile faded, “He has a kid..” she asked softly. “Yeah, with some girl named Y/N. She graduated early to take care of their kid and Jess wants both her and his son here but I told him there's no space and I can’t help cause of the diner and-”
“I’ll bring her in.” 
Luke looked at Lorelai. Her face wasn’t her joking face or smiling banter like always. But a serious one, her look of almost desperation. Lorelai looked back on when she was pregnant with Rory. How no one helped her and Christopher not even being there. But she saw how disappointed Jess’ face was when she came in. “Lorelai I can’t ask you for that, it’s too much your house is already cramped up,” Luke said. “No, tell Jess to tell Y/N to come, and I'll take her in, besides, it’s only me and a smarty pants who's always in school,” she said seriously. “I know how she probably must feel. I’ll tell Rory and we’ll make adjustments to an old upstairs room,” she said as she got up almost excitedly. “You forgot to pay!” Luke yelled out. “You can cover the bill for me ol’ diner boy!” she yelled out. 
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Jess got the news and began helping out Rory and Lorelai with moving everything and making sure everything was perfect for when Y/N and Liam arrived. He paid for furniture and sheets while Lorelai and Rory cleaned up some of Rory’s baby furniture to give to Jess and Y/N. Although they were girly it was better than nothing after all. Then suddenly everyone in Stars Hollow now knew Jess Mariano the 17-year-old schoolboy had a son. “Thank you guys so much, for letting us stay, I’m sorry for the bother, Liam cries only when his diaper is wet I promise I’ll try to keep quiet,” Y/N said as she carried Liam into the house while Rory helped with her luggage. “I’ll clean and cook, anything you tell me I’ll do,” she said. Lorelai smiled, “Well, thanks our wallets are crying from takeout every day.” she joked “But seriously it’s fine I was in your shoes before and I understand how hard it is for you to be so young. it’s fine.” Jess came in with bags in his hands filled with baby stuff. “I was gonna surprise you but I guess not,” he said smiling. Y/N sped walked towards him and hugged him while Liam was in between the two. 
“I’m glad you're here,” he said softly in her ear. He kissed her softly and pulled away to take Liam from her arms. “Hey.’ Jess smiled at Liam. His black hair shone in the sun from the window as the baby smiled and tugged on Jess’ shirt. “Hopefully you haven't been giving your mom a hard time these past few weeks,” he said to him smiling. Liam laid his head on Jess’ chest as he sucked his pacifier while Jess’ carried him around the house while Rory and Lorelai were giving Y/N a small tour of everything in the House as well as Stars Hollow. Everyone in Stars Hollow was suddenly interested in the new mom and son in town Including Kirk who offered to babysit for the very specific price of 23.99. Although the people were strange (Kirk) and people began asking about her and Liam it was finally Jess and Y/N alone in their room with Liam right in between them. 
“I’ve missed you” he whispered to her. His fingers ran through her hair as he looked into her eyes. Y/N closed her eyes as she took in everything. “Me too, just afraid I guess. It’s much quieter than New York I'll say that.” she smiled. She looked down to see Liam softly snoring in between them. Her hands went to the soft black hair he got from Jess as she smiled.  “This wasn’t the life I expected, but I’m glad I’m down this path with you and I don’t regret it one bit…” she said softly. Y/N leaned in and kissed Jess softly and passionately. This was their fresh start in life in the small town of Stars Hollow.
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thisgirlnamedblusy · 2 days ago
Note
Hey big fan of your work! I was wondering if you could write about Donna killing a trespasser in front of reader, she becomes really worried that this has upset reader/reader will see her as a monster but it actually really turns the reader on (powerful/protective lady moment ahh), maybe smut if you can! No GP <3
Yess!!! Thank you for your request and your kind words!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!! :))))
Powerful enough
Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Reader
Warnings: Slightly dark themes, smut at the end, Minors DNI, mentions of violence and murder, Donna being Donna, fluff
Word count: 8,404
Summary: Can she really protect you?
N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours!!! I love you all!!! :))
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“I don't know what I'm doing here, I should be making my dolls,” Donna murmured, letting you take her hand, despite her reluctance.
Opposites attract or so they said. Nonsense, attracted was a too insignificant verb to describe your relationship. In the two years you had been in that isolated house, you had felt many things similar to pure attraction, but with an intensity that made that word not enough.
Still, convincing Donna to leave her house, even for an innocent and invigorating walking around the grounds, was quite a feat.
“You spend all day with your dolls, I think a quiet walk with your girlfriend won’t hurt you, right?” you said amused, giving her repeated kisses on the cheek, to which the brunette protested with a playful movement of her hands.
“Ugh,” she groaned; her grumpy attitude at an all-time high.
A pity that those tender protests were one of the things you adored about Lady Beneviento.
“Going out is fun!” Angie shouted, who seemed much happier with that excursion than her owner.
“Look, Angie is happy,” you commented, blinking petulantly, leaning towards the lady’s shoulder. “Donna, stop being so grumpy, will you?”
“I'm not grumpy, tesoro,” she protested, sighing and looking around. “I just feel helpless to your requests.”
“That's because you love me,” you hissed with a mocking smile, clinging to her affectionately. “Or well, maybe I have some mental powers too.”
“Maybe, you're the most stubborn girl I've ever seen,” Donna teased, stealing a quick kiss on your lips and making your cheeks blush. “What's your goal with this?”
“My goal?” you asked confused. “Well… it doesn't have a goal. It’s just to spend the time and…”
“Spend the time,” the brunette repeated, looking around. “It's terribly cold, (Y/N).”
“You're such a whiner, darling, but don't worry, I'm used to it,” you said with a tone impregnated with malice, but without really being an acid comment. “Let's talk about something.”
“Mm? What do you want to talk about? It's cold,” she said, frowning, uncomfortable since, once again, you managed to convince her not to wear her veil.
After all, she didn't need it, it was still her land. No one dared to go beyond the wooden door, much less the bridge.
It took you a while to convince her to lose her fear of letting the breeze caress her beauty, but over time you had become a true master of conviction. Well, it could be that or that Donna was simply madly in love with you. Either option seemed valid to you.
“Let's see, let's see...” you whispered thoughtfully, looking up at the snowy trees that guarded the Lord’s territory like silent guardians, like a reminder that you were, in some way, safe. “Oh, yes, I've already finished the book you gave me.”
“You read fast,” Donna murmured, glancing at you out of the corner of her eye, resuming her steps, perhaps more calmly than before.
“You know I love adventures,” you said, sighing romantically, finally managing to walk at the same time as her, holding on to her hand, as if you didn't want to let her go. “Hey, let’s go that way,” you said, deviating slightly from the path towards one of the dilapidated cabins.
“That way? Why do you want to go that way?” the lady asked, letting your hand go and tilting her head as she looked at the cabins. “(Y/N), it’s dangerous, something could collapse and…”
“How old are those cabins?” you asked, making your way through the undergrowth surrounding what was once surely a beautiful metal structure, full of flowers.
“Oh, um…” she replied, watching your clumsy steps through the weeds. “Those cabins were here before my family built the house.”
“Interesting,” you commented, nodding slowly and looking for the best place to cross that kind of protection time granted to that place. “Well, if they haven’t collapsed in all this time, I doubt they will now, right?”
“You are definitely stubborn,” the lady whispered, leading you by the arm along a safer path to one of the cabins. “There, a ruined cabin just for you.”
“Great,” you sighed, rubbing your hands together, but showing no sign of imminent freezing.
“Be careful, (Y/N),” Donna whispered as you explored, the thirst for adventure running through your veins.
“Yes, yes…” you said, rolling your eyes and glancing around that desolate cabin. “Who lived here?”
“Josef, the gardener,” the lady said, answering your question in a somewhat hasty way. “He always worked for my family, he even took care of me after…” she whispered, stopping right at the end of the sentence, not wanting to remember all the tragedies she had to live through.
“Donna, calm down,” you said, cupping her face in your hands before an inevitable crisis clouded that wonderful day. “You don't have to tell me, come on, breathe…” you said, doing relaxation exercises you already knew and that luckily, also calmed the inevitable madness of the lady in black.
“I-I'm sorry,” she stammered, regaining her calm gaze and sketching a shy smile. “I've gotten a little nervous.”
“I know, it's okay,” you said, kissing her slowly on the lips, thus finishing to calm her tormented mind. “Come, Angie, let's explore,” you said to the doll, who followed you immediately.
You and Angie walked through that ruined cabin, finding just old books, typewriters destroyed by time and gardening tools, but, nothing interesting, unfortunately.
You were about to give up, to recognize the cold you were going through and tell your girlfriend you wanted to go home, when you noticed an old shed on the side of the cabin.
“Well, well, Donna, come, look at this,” you said as you and Angie peered over a fallen piece of wood that spanned the shed. “Wait a minute…” you sighed, pulling the obstacle and letting it fall into the snow.
“Be more careful, silly!” Angie protested, as she was almost crushed.
“Oops, sorry,” you said with a worried face, enduring the blows of the doll on your shins. “Look at this…”
“Mm,” the lady murmured, frowning and looking into the shed.
Inside the old structure was a sort of miniature of a house with a too convenient path leading down, as if something had to go there. Beneath the model, there were some tightly closed bars, and inside there was a golden glow that immediately caught your attention.
“What’s this?” you asked, studying that miniature house. “Look, it moves,” you said surprised, realizing that you could move the model at will.
“Oh, it's one of the four labyrinths of Norshteyn,” the brunette explained, with disinterest.
“Who?” you asked, scratching your head and looking curiously at the lady. “A labyrinth?”
“Mm,” she murmured in response, approaching the model with a serious look. “In the 19th century, a craftsman named Norshteyn came to the village. They said he was considered a heretic in his country.
You nodded, blinking in curiosity.
“A craftsman?” you asked, running your fingers over that house. “Wow, he was good.”
“It is said that he made them due to the hospitality in the village. He built four labyrinths for each of the noble families of the place, labyrinths that could contain whatever they wanted,” Donna explained, passing her hand next to yours. “The families deposited some of their treasures inside the labyrinth, hoping that no thief could get them.”
“Oh,” you said attentively, trying to open the gate, something impossible. “He certainly did a good job, this is impossible to open.”
“You can pull as hard as you want, tesoro,” she said, amused by your fruitless attempts. “Karl, Alcina and Salvatore have one model too.”
“Of course... the four families, four Lords, it makes sense,” you said amused, studying the mechanism. “Surely he felt satisfied with his job.”
“Not exactly,” the lady corrected, getting closer to your ear. “When he finished the last of them, he blew off his head.”
“Um, what?” you said, scared by the sinister voice that Donna mastered perfectly. “Why?”
“Nobody knows, it is said that he had four wives, and they all died. He couldn't handle the guilt and…” she whispered in a mysterious tone. “There are many stories about him, but the legend said that he sold his soul to the devil to rescue those of the four loves of his life, paying a very high price.”
“A-A price…” you stammered, letting yourself be carried away by that slightly terrifying atmosphere. “Which one?”
“His own life,” she said, with an increasingly sinister tone, surrounding you by the waist from behind, making you swallow. “There are people who say that those souls… live in these labyrinths… the souls in pain of his wives, desperately searching for their lover, for all eternity.”
“Boo!” Angie screamed, coming out from behind the model and making you almost jump into Donna's arms, taking refuge behind her.
“Yiah!” you screamed, your heart beating very hard while the doll laughed, as did her owner. “Donna…”
“What's wrong, tesoro? Did we scare you?” she asked, grabbing your arm and pulling you closer to her in a playful way, kissing you quickly.
“Yes…” you reluctantly admitted, crossing your arms, but returning the kisses while the doll laughed satisfied. “Donna, you give me the creeps.”
“It must be the cold,” Donna joked, kissing you for the last time and releasing you from her grip while you, pathetically, tried to regain your composure. “Anyway, you won't be able to open it just like that, it needs a key.”
“A key,” you commented, shaking your dress and squinting at the doll, who was still laughing at the scare she gave you. “What key? Do you have it?”
“I don’t,” she said, arranging your clothes lovingly, rubbing your arms. “It's not just any key, it's a kind of ball that you have to roll along the rails to get it into this hole here, see?” she pointed to a small round hole at the end of the model, and you nodded curiously.
“A ball... I see, well, we'll have to look for it, right?” you said, catching your breath and searching around the model. “You don't know where it is? It belonged to your family, didn't it?”
“Yes, but it's probably lost,” the lady commented, sighing with a victorious smile. “Don't bother looking for it, my grandfather tried several times and didn't find it.”
“Well, maybe I can,” you said enthusiastically. “It could be a good adventure, right? The search for a treasure…”
“(Y/N), let's go home, you're just wasting time,” she said, putting a hand on your shoulder.
“Killjoy,” you hissed discreetly. “Come on, Donna, it has to be somewhere…”
“No, besides, it's getting dark, we should go back now,” the lady insisted, crossing her arms.
The cold was already unbearable, and, although you hated to agree with your girlfriend, that time she was right.
“Ugh, okay,” you sighed with a childish grimace. “But I plan to find that key,” you said, raising a finger and letting Donna slide her hand around your waist, guiding you on the way home.
“Mm, I didn't know you were interested in treasure hunts,” she commented with a tender smile.
“Well,” you said in a passive tone. “I've read a lot of similar stories, but I still prefer novels about knights, you know: damsels in distress, dragons…”
Donna laughed, shaking her head and pulling you a little closer to her.
“They are my absolute weakness,” you murmured, fantasizing about your favorite stories. “Especially the part where the brave knight kills the dragon and saves the girl. It must be very romantic.”
“Dragons don't exist,” Donna said in a serious tone, showing you her poor conversational skills, taking everything you said totally seriously.
“Tell your sister,” you said amused, making her shake her head. “The feeling of being saved by a strong and brave knight… it must be great, right?”
“Mm,” she murmured, kissing your hair, not paying too much attention to your fanciful words.
“You know, oh my dear knight, I'm so weak I think I'm going to faint…” you said in a dramatic tone, pulling away and putting a hand on your forehead before doing something stupid, before letting yourself fall to the ground, hoping that she would pick you up in her arms, something that, of course, didn't happen.
“Ouch!” you screamed as you fell to the snowy ground with a thud, glaring angrily at your girlfriend.
“What are you doing? Have you gone crazy?”  the lady said, clumsily helping you up as Angie laughed out loud again. “(Y/N)…”
“Ugh, you were supposed to pick me up,” you whispered, letting yourself be helped and checking to see if you had hurt yourself. “Donna… you didn't save your damsel in distress.”
“Damsel in distress? Cavolo, (Y/N), how do you expect me to know that you were going to let yourself fall?” she protested, checking your condition as well. “Are you hurt?”
“No, I'm fine,” you growled with a childish gesture, pushing the brunette's hands away. “And you, stop laughing,” you said to Angie, who was writhing on the floor.
“You are so silly, silly, silly,” the doll mocked, pointing at you with her finger. “You amuse me.”
“Fine,” you hissed, rubbing your back and noticing an even more penetrating cold. “Brr, I'm going to catch a cold.”
“Don't worry, tesoro, let's go home and take a hot bath, do you fancy it?” Donna suggested with a warm smile, kissing you as an apology.
“Yeah, sounds great,” you said, relaxing your expression and your posture.
 A hot bath next to the woman you loved was certainly a good plan. Your naked bodies warmed in the water as you intertwined in a comfortable, relaxing silence.
With your head on her chest and her arms around your waist, you continued to fantasize, making your mind travel through stories and memories, memories of how you got to where you were, why you were there, next to her.
You were a simple villager in a not so simple village. The Black Gods, the Lords, Mother Miranda… These were things that made the place very different from any other. You knew it, but you didn't give it any importance, at least until you realized what it meant to have all these entities around you.
You were eight years old, you were a little and dreamer girl like any of your friends, running errands for your parents, praying and having fun. One night, when you had to give some tools to your uncle, while you were walking in the dark through the poorly lit streets, you got a scare that would change your life forever.
Miserable rat or idiot, you didn't know how to describe the man who attacked you from the shadows, demanding, under threats, that you give him all your money. You were a child, you were scared and defenseless.
You had never been so afraid, the knife the robber carried shone in the moonlight and you closed your eyes as you cried in terror. It could have been your end, or, at best, stayed in your mind as an insurmountable trauma, but it wasn't.
You never really believed in miracles, that your devotion to dark deities served any purpose, but that night, yes, that night you witnessed your mistake. Just when you gave up, cornered and with your bag of coins already at the mercy of the attacker, some blades shone next to the knife, abruptly pushing that man away from you.
A local hero? A divine intervention? No, a Lord.
The lady of the castle, Alcina Dimitrescu, finished off that robber. She didn't say anything; she simply looked at you, smiled at you and took what was left of that evil man.
Then your vision of the village changed completely. Everyone, your family, your friends, everyone feared the Lords. They saw them as a constant threat. Mother Miranda always insisted that she, as well as the four nobles, protected the village. You didn't believe it before, but you started to.
The rejection and fear that those four shadows caused you silently mutated into an admiration that became increasingly sick. The priestess was right, they protected you. They were in charge of keeping the village at peace, of freeing you from possible threats. It was impossible for you not to believe it, you had lived it.
Stopping seeing the four Lords as a threat to see them as a shield unleashed many thoughts, you even dared to write letters to the lady of the castle, thanking her for her intervention. They could be childish things, but time passed, and your devotion to the four shadows of the village didn’t diminish.
They were your saviors, your protectors, and it almost seemed like you were the only one who saw them that way. Each and every one of them had extraordinary powers, capable of chasing away anyone who dared to poke their nose into the village's affairs, or harm you. They didn't care if you were rich, poor, or who you were; to them, all of your lives were worthy of protection.
Your devotion to these protectors surpassed even rationality, fervently wishing to meet them, admire them, have a moment to talk to them, to thank them for everything they did. Already 20 years old and with a bold and extroverted character, that goal was closer than ever.
What you never imagined was falling in love with one of them, one that you saw off guard to attack with your questions and sick adoration, the lady in black, the doll maker, Donna Beneviento.
The woman in mourning, always silent and mysterious, unwittingly put herself at the mercy of your approach, at the mercy of your exaggerated words of admiration. As much as the Angie doll protested, the lady didn’t move; she simply listened to you.
Thus, with time, you came to see the beauty she hid, to hear her melodic voice speaking to you, incredulous, surprised because you, unlike the others, didn’t fear her. Love arose soon after, and without wanting to, you ended up completely in love with the lady in black, just as her with you.
Maybe she couldn't transform into a dragon, or control metal, but those trifles ceased to be important to you the moment your lips touched hers. Power and strength stopped being your fixation, Donna began to be.
Two years later, your relationship was perfect, harmonious. The fact that she was a Lord, that somehow you felt safe was something you didn't usually think about.
Donna was a strange woman, hurt by a madness no one could remedy, but she was much more than that, much more than the monster everyone talked about. You weren't exaggerating if you said that she was the love of your life.
Your body enjoyed the warmth of the water, the touch against hers, that vaporized silence filling your mind with dreams and memories. As you moved to let her lips kiss your neck, you felt a slight pain in your back, probably due to the fall.
That pain made you grimace in disgust, but it also made your mind move away from the pure love you felt for Donna, asking yourself a series of questions you had never gotten an answer to.
“Mm, Donna,” you sighed, playing with her hand under the water, breaking the calm, but speaking with a velvety, romantic tone. “Can I ask a question?”
“Sure, tesoro,” she whispered, kissing your ear and leaving her kisses for another time, giving you all her attention.
“Hey, who do you think is the most powerful of your siblings?” you asked distractedly, looking at the ceiling as you moved in the water.
“The most powerful?” Donna asked back, with a thoughtful sigh. “Honestly, I wouldn't know how to answer your question,” she sighed shortly after, looking at you out of the corner of your eye. “Why do you want to know?”
“Oh, curiosity,” you said shrugging, lying back on top of her body. “Well, Alcina can transform into a dragon…”
“It's not exactly a dragon, it's a…” the lady interrupted.
“Yes, yes, a mutation, or whatever. Dragon sounds much better than a mutation of a disgusting mold, doesn't it?” you joked, shaking your head.
She laughed too wrapping her arms around your waist, keeping you closer to her, if that was even possible.
“Let's see, Heisenberg can control metal, Moreau is a huge disgusting fish…” you murmured, counting on your fingers. “Honestly, I ask you because I couldn't tell you which one of them is more powerful.”
“Hey, tesoro, aren't you forgetting something?” she said in a mocking tone, frowning and moving your head so you would look at her.
“Mm? Oh, of course you're there too, but you're no use to me for this,” you said without thinking, causing the water to move along with her body, abruptly.
“Why not?” the lady asked with an inquisitive expression.
You rolled your eyes, turning around to face her.
“Donna, honey, you can't transform,” you said softly, calmly caressing her cheek due to her annoyed look. “I'm talking about real powers.”
“I have real powers, I'm as strong as them, even more,” Donna protested, crossing her arms, with a marked accent that betrayed her anger.
“Yes, yes... you make people hallucinate, but, my love, it's not like you're the strongest woman in the world,” you said jokingly, perhaps without too much care.
“Playing with people's minds isn't enough power? I'm telling you I'm as strong as them,” she insisted nervously, to which you caressed her face amused, biting your lip while your hand traveled along the skin of her arm, pinching it mercilessly. “Cazzo! Cosa diavolo stai facendo!?”
“You see, my love? You control minds, yes, but your body is weak, isn't it?” you mocked while she looked at you with resentment, rubbing her injured arm.
“You say I'm weak?” she asked in a brusque tone, terribly offended. “You think so?”
“No, look, Donna, you know that I love you very much, but maybe you wouldn't be the right one to face an imminent danger, right?”
“I'm stronger than you think!” she said, shouting in a very loud voice, making you back up in the tub.
“Okay, then prove it to me, make me hallucinate,” you challenged your girlfriend, approaching her in the water, suggestively crawling up to her body.
“No,” she answered coldly, putting a hand on your bare chest. “I'm not going to do it.”
“Aren’t you? Come on, say that I'm wrong,” you joked, making a gesture with your hand. “I want to see how powerful my girlfriend is.”
“No, (Y/N), I'm not going to hurt you,” she said, shaking her head and hastily going out the tub. “My powers are not a game, (Y/N). I don't care if you think they're useless.”
“Hey, I didn't say that,” you said, reaching out your hand to take hers while she picked up a towel, covering herself with it. “Donna, don't be mad, come here so I can apologize.”
“I have to make dinner,” she said, leaving the bathroom and you, in the bathtub, sighed regretfully.
“But what did I say?” you murmured, scratching the back of your neck and shrugging. “Oh, I must learn to keep my mouth shut…”
Luckily, the tension you caused dissipated over time and the day could end as usual. You had absolutely nothing against the lady, you didn't doubt her powers, in fact, you knew that, whatever she did, no one had dared to enter her property for years, apart from you, of course.
Okay, maybe the lady in black wasn't the strong and invincible Lord you admired, but that wasn't a reason to stop loving her. Strength was not your main goal, especially when you were able to truly meet Donna, when you saw her deformed but amazing beauty, when her whispers, her caresses, made all the hair on your body stand up.
You didn't bring up the subject again, and the next day started like any other, except that, that morning, you woke up with only one goal. You still had that sinister story of the labyrinths in your head, and you dedicated your always lonely morning to looking for some information around the house.
Your thirst for adventure was insatiable, even wandering alone through the halls of the mansion was an epic feat for you. Donna never minded you rummaging through her stuff, through her memories, as long as you did it with respect. And so you did, dusting off old books you barely understood.
While you were searching, you came across an old notebook that caught your attention, especially because of what was written in it: Fabrizio Beneviento (1878).
It looked like an old diary; a notebook as old as time, with its yellowed, delicate pages that seemed to want to fall apart among your fingers. Logically, it was the property of an ancestor of the lady in black, and the date coincided with the creation of the labyrinths. Your favorite novels were those about knights, but you didn't dislike detective stories at all.
“Oh, I have to ask Donna to teach me Italian, I don't understand anything,” you said with a confused grimace, trying to decipher what those old pages said.
After looking at those incomprehensible sentences in bewilderment, you finally found something, a name that you expected to read: Norshteyn.
“Bingo,” you said satisfied, marking the page and walking towards the workshop, where Donna was working, as always, on her dolls.
“Hey, silly!” Angie shouted, swinging her legs on a table while the lady worked, distracted by the shouts and shaking her head at you.
“Angie…” Donna murmured, dropping a paintbrush with a grimace of disgust. “You almost ruined my work.”
“Tell her, she interrupted you,” the doll said, pointing at you.
The lady smiled, shaking her head as you approached and gave her a quick kiss in greeting.
“Are you bored, tesoro?” she asked softly, smoothing your hair.
“No, not exactly,” you said triumphantly, holding up the notebook. “Look what I found. I think it belongs to a relative of yours… Fabrizio Beneviento.”
“Wow,” she sighed, studying the notebook. “Yes, he was my ancestor, what’s this about?”
“Look, in this part it talks about the labyrinths of that Norshteyn guy. It might say where the key is,” you said, pointing at the page. “But… I don’t understand what it says. Would my wonderful girlfriend be so kind as to translate it for me?”
Donna laughed, nodding with a slight blush on her cheek, looking down at the text.
“Let’s see…” she sighed, picking up the book. “There’s something about that man that makes me shudder, no matter how kind he was when he built that chest,” she began to read.
“I have a bad feeling about him. Maybe opening it is a bad idea, my legs shake every time I get close to that damn model. I have no way of knowing what evil powers will be unleashed if I let that key slide down the rails. I have enough problems already, it would be best to hide it, and I have the perfect place, under the tree in the nearby cabin.”
“Wow… is that what it says?” you asked expectantly.
“Uh-huh,” the lady said, turning the pages with curiosity.
“Great, great, we have to go to the cabin to look for the key,” you said excitedly, rubbing your hands. “Treasure, here I go…”
“Hey, stop, (Y/N), do you intend to go now? The sky is very dark, I fear a storm is approaching,” Donna said, closing the notebook and tilting her head.
“W-Well, then we better hurry up,” you said jumping. “Come on, Donna, let’s go…”
“Do I have to go with you?” the brunette asked, frowning and looking away at her dolls. “(Y/N), I'm working on…”
“Yes, yes… your dolls, I know,” you said looking up and putting your hands on her shoulders. “It'll just be a moment, besides we already know where it is.”
“No,” she said with a cold look, turning around and picking up the brush again.
“Donna…” you sighed disappointedly, waving your hands. “Don't be boring, come on, let's go…”
“Why don't you go by yourself?” she asked, annoyed by your insistence and the distraction you caused in her greatest passion.
“I…” you stammered, embarrassed.
No, you weren't a coward but… well, walking through that sinister forest, through that place in ruins… yes, it made you feel like a coward, but you weren't, really, you weren't…
“It's just that…” you whispered, dragging out your words. “I don't like walking alone through the forest. I'd rather you came with me, just in case.”
“Mm,” Donna murmured, dropping the brush again and crossing her arms. “I repeat the question, tesoro: why do you want me to go with you? I'm weak, remember?” she said, spitting out her words, telling you she hadn't forgotten the conversation from the day before.
“Oh, come on, I didn't mean it,” you said with a growl. “I'd feel safer if you were with me, because you could protect me, right?” you said, changing your tone from pleading to a slightly defiant one.
The lady in black abruptly stood up from her chair, clenching her fists on either side of her hips.
“Do you doubt that I can protect you?” she hissed with a dark look, one that betrayed that you had made an annoying insinuation.
“Mm, no,” you said, looking at your nails with disinterest. “But it would be a good occasion to prove it, don’t you think? Imagine if a lycan sneaks onto the grounds, or if I trip and fall and…”
“Ugh, basta. Va bene, va bene…” the doll maker growled, kicking the ground in a childish manner. “I’ll accompany you so you shut that big mouth, but not now, I’m busy. We’ll go this afternoon.”
“Mm, Donna,” you said with a triumphant smile, throwing yourself into her arms. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”
“Lasciami, you always do whatever you want with me, tesoro,” she said with an amused smile, fighting against your tireless kisses.
“You're the best,” you whispered, giving her one last kiss on the cheek. “I'll leave you alone,” you said with a sweet voice walking out of the workshop.
“Finally!” the doll squealed.
“Angie…”
The adventure would have to wait, but only for a few hours. Donna kept her promise, walking with you through the forest again. The lady was right, the impending storm could even be smelled, but that didn't matter to you.
You dug in the indicated place, finally finding your prize, a ball decorated with the crest of the Beneviento family, the key that opened that mysterious labyrinth.
“I found it, look, it's cool,” you said, walking towards the lady, who was waiting impatiently, with her arms crossed.
“Mm, it's beautiful,” she said, studying the ball curiously, running her fingers over the engraving.
“Yeah, and now... let's play labyrinths and...” you said, approaching the shed triumphantly.
“Watch out for the ghost!” Angie shouted, which, along with a terrifying thunder that shook your insides, caused you to lose your balance with a cowardly scream.
“Shit!” you yelled, causing the ball to fall to the ground.
You bent down to pick it up, but at that moment a drop of ice-cold water fell on the tip of your nose, forcing you to look up.
“Does it have to be now?” you protested angrily, looking at the model out of the corner of your eye as Donna ran beside you. “Come on.”
“Let’s go home, tesoro, before we end up soaked,” she said, dragging you back to the mansion. “(Y/N)…”
“Jeez…” you sighed in disappointment, but at that moment, another thunderclap made you jump on the ground. “Uh… okay, good idea.”
Luckily the storm didn't reach you.
“Almost,” you sighed, closing the door of the mansion, holding the ball tightly. “Don't think you've beaten me, stupid ball… wait until tomorrow,” you hissed, putting it in your pocket.
“I better get dinner ready,” Donna murmured, watching the rain that was beginning to fall without remedy, making the sunset even darker.
“Wait, wait,” you said hurriedly, running next to her. “I'll go with you, so I can keep you company.”
“Do you want to see me cook?” she asked, letting your hands hug her waist.
You blushed and nodded effusively, kissing her slowly.
“Yes, I want to compensate you for having accompanied me,” you whispered, getting closer.
“I can think of better ways to do it. But it's fine for now,” Donna purred, tugging erotically at your lower lip and pulling away in an almost painful way.
After all, it was a fun afternoon. The two of you cooked together, laughed, kissed, almost let yourself be carried away by passion... Nothing could go wrong that night, nothing.
“I'll set the table,” you said, exiting the elevator with the lady.
She smiled in response, walking beside you towards the living room.
You hummed as you placed the cutlery in its place, glancing sideways at the open door to the hall. You turned your head without noticing a detail, and did so again abruptly when you noticed something was wrong. The entrance door was banging due to the wind, it was open.
“Um, Donna, did you open the door?” you asked with a frown, getting closer to the entrance.
“No, didn't you close it?” the lady asked, carefully correcting the places of the cutlery so everything looked perfect.
“Y-Yes,” you said nervous, confused, remembering that, indeed, you closed it. “I'm completely sure that I closed it.”
“Mm, it must have been the wind,” Donna commented.
“Anyway, I'm going to close it,” you finally sighed, approaching the entrance.
Just as you crossed the door to the hall, you felt a strong grip on your body, hands that grabbed you tightly and an arm around your neck. In front of you was what looked like a dagger, a knife, shining in the light of the mansion.
“Ah!” you screamed, struggling with that strength, with that arm that surrounded you.
“Shh, quiet,” a male voice threatened in your ear. “Walk.”
He looked like a man from the village because of his clothes, but his furious breathing told you that he was dangerous. Slowly, trapped like a hostage, you returned to the living room, trying to scream, with your mouth covered by the hand with the knife.
With a strong movement of your body, you managed to free yourself from his hand, and finally, scream.
“Donna!” you screamed, drawing the attention of the lady in black, who immediately turned around, opening her eye wide when she saw the scene. “Donn…” you couldn't scream again, as the edge of the knife dug into your throat.
“Silence,” that man said, wet from the rain, roaring like a beast eager for blood. “Don't move, you weirdo,” he said to Donna, you suspected with a sinister smile.
The lady didn't move an inch. She just stared at the aggressor, without saying a single word, coldly.
“That's it, very good,” he hissed satisfied, pulling you to expose your throat even more. “Good girl.”
“Donna, please…” you whispered pleadingly when you saw your girlfriend's calm, a calm that began to make you nervous. “Donna…”
“Shh, shut up,” the man demanded, pressing the knife harder into your skin. “Cooperate and I won't do anything to you, little bird… I haven't come for you, but for her.”
“Dare to do something to my Donna's girlfriend, you bastard!” Angie threatened, immediately reassured by a fleeting glance from the lady.
“Oh, is she your girlfriend?” the attacker sang. “You have good taste, I admit it, a shame it's your last day with her.”
“Let me go!” you shrieked, trying to free yourself from the grip.
“You think you're very important, don't you? You and that gang of monsters,” the man said, ignoring your protests.
Donna raised her chin, but once again, she remained motionless.
“You've been desecrating this village with your lies and demonic blasphemies, but it's over. I won't allow it, I'll finish you off. I advise you to behave yourself, Beneviento, or else I'll hurt this beauty, what do you say? Will you let me finish you off?”
“Donna, for the Gods' sake, help me,” you said angrily, frustrated.
“You're not going to do anything to the girl,” the brunette finally said, walking a step closer to you.
“How bold for a nutcase like you,” he mocked, making you feel a stab of pain in your throat as you felt the knife graze your skin. “Don't take another step, monster, or the girl dies.”
“The girl won't die,” Donna said, getting a little closer, darkening her gaze and raising a hand towards you. “You will.”
“You wanted it…” the man hissed, suddenly loosening his grip. “What? What?!” he shrieked as he looked at his own hand.
Taking advantage of that moment, you broke free with a push, running into the arms of your beloved.
“Tutto bene, (Y/N)?” Donna asked in a whisper, holding you against her chest.
You nodded on the verge of panic, not letting the lady's body go.
“No, no…” the man murmured, scratching his skin with the knife, trying to get rid of something. “Take it off!”
“Don't look,” Donna told you, turning your head towards her clothes, holding you tightly against her as she raised her hand again.
“You can't!” he shrieked, desperate, along with a horrible sound of something breaking, it sounded like bones.
You heard something fall to the wooden floor, the knife. Curious and nervous, you shifted to observe, though you wished you hadn't.
The attacker's arm was twisted, completely out of place, surely broken.
“No, no! Don't make me do this!” he pleaded, falling to the floor on his knees, while his good hand hit it, twisting until that horrible crunch attacked your ears again. “Ah, Gods, no! Forgive me, my lady! No, please!”
“You threatened (Y/N), my family,” the lady whispered, with a tone that gave chills. “You have to pay for it.”
“No, no!” he screamed, desperate, involuntarily hitting his head against the wood. “No, take it away from me! They're going to eat my brain! No, out, out!”
“Do you want me to stop?” the lady asked, while hugging you with a sinister smile.
The man, terribly wounded, stood up fighting against invisible enemies, barely able to move, throwing a chair in front of him.
“Leave me alone, damn it! You won't take me alive!” he screamed for the last time, letting himself fall backwards, hitting his neck on the chair with a last terrible crunch, ceasing to scream, to exist.
“It's over, (Y/N),” the lady said, hugging your face while you squeezed your eyes shut tightly. “That's it, tesoro... shh...”
“D-Donna, he was going to kill me, he was going to...” you said sobbing in fear, with the lady in black controlling your tremors as best she could.
You turned your head to look at your attacker, with his neck dislocated in the chair, with a look of terror that you would dream about for several nights.
“H-He's… dead,” you murmured scared. “He's dead,” you repeated nervously, shaking your head.
“No, tesoro, don't look, look at me, come on,” Donna said, guiding your gaze away from the corpse. “(Y/N)…”
“D-Donna…” you sobbed again, breathing heavily, in shock and disobeying the lady's orders, turning your head again and growling in rage. “You son of a bitch!” you screamed, breaking free from your girlfriend's grip and walking towards the body, kicking it in a crazy way. “Bastard!”
“Hey, hey, tesoro, stop, please,” the lady said, grabbing you to get you away from the attacker, having to fight with your kicks. “Enough, it's over, he won't hurt you anymore.”
“Donna, he was going to kill me,” you cried, in a terrible panic attack, clinging to the Lord’s clothes while soaking them with your tears. “He was going to kill me…”
She sighed and kissed your head while still hugging you, rocking your body in a comforting way.
“Don't cry,” Donna whispered. “Don't cry, please…”
“He was going to kill me,” you repeated, unable to say anything else until you regained some consciousness, enough to realize what had happened. “He was going to kill me and now… now he's dead,” you gasped, opening your eyes wide and moving away from her embrace. “He's dead… You, you killed him, you killed that man,” you stammered pointing at the lady, who shook her head.
“Tesoro, I had to do it, he was going to hurt you,” she excused herself, trying to get you closer to her again, something that, due to shock and nerves, you rejected with a step back.
“Donna, you killed a person,” you repeated passing a hand over your forehead.
“I was protecting you, don't you understand? I… Oh, cazzo… Listen to me, amore mio… I didn't want to…”
“You tortured him and then you killed him, Donna,” you said nervously, shaking your head. “Gods…”
“What did you want me to do? He had a knife at your damn throat!” she shrieked, with a crazy look. “I… I-I'm, sorry, I… per favore, tesoro, don't be afraid of me. I promise I'm not a monster, please…”
“No, Donna,” you said in a calmer tone, with the panic fading from your mind and body. “I'm not afraid of you, I… Donna, my love, you saved me. Oh, Donna,” you sighed, running back to her side, hugging her tightly.
“(Y/N)…”
“Donna, my love, thank you so much, thank you for saving me,” you sobbed, burying your face in her dress. “You saved me…”
“Calm down, stop crying, (Y/N),” the lady said, putting a hand on your shoulder and looking at you closely. “Oh, you have a wound on your neck…” she sighed, staining her finger with your blood. “Come, sit down, I… will make some calls to clean this up and then I will heal you, okay? Just, just relax.”
You let yourself be guided by her and obeyed, giving one last look to the lifeless attacker, a look devoid of fear, full of hate. He got what he deserved, you were convinced.
Soon after, Heisenberg appeared to clean up the mess, and finally, with your nerves completely calm, you could breathe and think coldly about everything that had happened. You were completely wrong about Donna. She seemed the weakest of the four, but she wasn't, now you knew.
Mind control, tormenting someone to the point of forcing them to end their life, was perhaps not the physical strength and power you admired, but it was, without a doubt, the most dangerous skill. Isolated from the world around you, you fantasized about what had happened, imagining Donna as one of those knights who rescued damsels in distress, as your savior, the woman who would always protect you, always.
That childish thought at first turned into something more due to euphoria, something you weren't sure you could control.
“It's nothing serious, just a scratch,” the lady murmured as she passed a cotton ball over your wound, in a silent moment, warm in a certain way. “Are you feeling better?”
“Yes,” you said, taking a breath as you endured that sting. “Better than ever.”
“Mm, you must be in shock,” she commented, caressing your cheek. “Ascoltami, (Y/N), you have to understand that I did it for you, to save you. If I lost you… I don’t know what would become of me, do you understand?”
“Yes, I understand,” you said with a smile that made the brunette frown and held your face a tighter.
“You understand… fine,” Donna sighed, letting your face go and finishing healing your wound. “I would understand that you were afraid of me, maybe I would prefer that you continue thinking that I am weak,” she whispered amused, kissing your forehead affectionately.
“I have never really thought that way,” you said due to the sudden heat of your body. “Besides, I don’t need a huge monster to protect me, with you it is more than enough. I’m safe with you, right?”
“Yes, of course you are. I will always protect you, no matter what,” she whispered, getting dangerously close to your lips, leaving them at the mercy of yours, which were quick to take advantage of the situation and kiss them deeply.
“Mm,” you murmured at the lady's confused attitude towards your kisses, but without giving her much time to react. “So... are you like my savior knight?”
“Do I look like a knight to you?” she joked, playing along, returning those increasingly wet kisses.
“Mm, no, I would never do this to a knight,” you purred, leaving her lips aside, kissing her neck as you pushed her against the couch, climbing up her hips.
“(Y/N), what are you doing?” she asked at your sudden attack of lust, but not resisting at all. “I think you should rest.”
“No, no, Donna... a damsel in distress should be grateful, don't you think?” you whispered in her ear, biting her lobe, tearing a gasp from her lips as your hand ran over her chest, passively playing with the buttons of her dress.
“No, I… I'm altruistic, I just do it for love,” she said, her words clumsy, with a nervous smile at your touch, your wet kisses on her skin, the subtle sway of your hips.
“Then you will receive love,” you hissed, capturing her lips to silence her reluctance, leaving her completely still, leaving your savior without any chance of saving herself.
The kisses echoed off the walls, the euphoria drove you crazy, making you much more mischievous, fighting against her tongue in a fair battle while her hands delighted in your skin, slipping through the slits of your dress, squeezing, scratching, possessing…
“Mm, Donna,” you said, looking at the confused but visibly nervous lady, with her skin burning under the subtle touch of your lips, under the soft caresses of your fingertips on her neck. “My lady, allow me to kneel…”
You whispered in her ear, getting up to carry out your threat, letting your knees rest on the wooden floor as your hands became vines on her legs, under her dress, making her tremble.
“(Y/N), it's not the time, I…” she said, without moving away from the poison ivy that spread across her skin, those stinging leaves that dug into her flesh as they climbed helplessly, as they pulled up the black fabric to keep it out of your sight.
Ignoring those weak complaints, you reached her thighs, locking your eyes on hers, looking for a cowardly and silent approval, the trembling of her body, a subtle moan when your hand ran over her telltale wetness through the underwear.
“Cazzo…” she cursed, looking away, embarrassed, shy as always, but excited as never.
A sinister, menacing smile spread across your face as your lips distracted the doll maker, running over the places marked by your nails, kissing, tasting her warm skin.
Your hands, knowing that Donna was too busy with the pleasure your kisses gave her, the tickling your lips did to her skin, took advantage of that confusion, those pleasurable moans that came out of her mouth, to pull at the edges of the garment that covered her shame, sliding it elegantly down her legs, which didn’t resist.
“(Y/N)…” the lady moaned when she noticed you were getting closer, that your kisses and your body were moving towards her. “Gods…”
Your hands played their role well, slightly separating the brunette's legs while grabbing her flesh, while your mouth salivated at the sight of her shiny wetness in front of you, with her arousal clouding all your senses.
You didn't want to waste time, and you immersed yourself in her, kissing and savoring her essence in a delicate way, adoring her flavor, her skin, the moisture that permeated your impatient lips.
“Mm, delicious, Donna,” you moaned sensually, running your tongue through her folds, making her shudder, her hands going wild, tangling in your hair, holding you on her body. “Do you want me to stop?”
“No,” she said with a voice broken by pleasure, closing her eye from the embarrassment of the situation, from the carefully studied movements of your lips on hers.
Donna moaned, writhing when the kisses attacked her clit, her most sensitive area, licking, sucking, moving in circles like a slow and wet dance, a delicate and cautious dance that drew from her lips the most beautiful melodies you had ever heard.
Her moans stopped being harmonious, becoming a kind of claim, a demand for you to increase your speed, to be constant and never abandon her. That was always Donna's greatest fear, that you would abandon her, no matter in what sense.
She was your savior, your protector, your refuge, your inspiration, she was everything to you and you to her.
How could she not protect her most precious possession? She would do it fiercely, she would always do it, because she loved you. Thinking about that protection only gave you more pleasure. It tempted you to stimulate yourself, to be selfish, but you were always strong against impulses.
Your kisses, the caresses of your tongue, the union of your fingers to that wet gratitude were too much for you, but they were also a reward, an act of love, of promises that would always be fulfilled, of passion, of lust, of madness, of moans and supplications… Donna and you, you and Donna, Lord and villager, knight and damsel, love and lust.
“Per, per favore… don’t stop now,” the lady said, panting nervously when you dared to enter, when your fingers slid along her walls while your tongue was unable to speak, being too busy with her taste, with her movements, with the beauty of her trembling body. “Sto per venire…”
“Oh, my love…” you sighed, laughing tenderly, granting your savior the gift of release, curling inside her, feeling her body demand your presence, squeezing you without wanting to let you go.
Donna screamed and you did too against her skin. Her body moved uncomfortably from the waves of pleasure and the moisture was already part of your mouth. Her arousal slipped from your lips, her movements stimulated your own lust, making you moan in unison.
“Donna…” you said with a kind look, leaning on her knees as she recovered from her well-deserved orgasm. “You will always protect me, right?”
“Always…”
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