#I remember not too long ago I was so sad because I felt like he wasn't happy in Frankfurt
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fortunapre · 2 days ago
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𝐖𝐡at Happens 𝐢𝐧 𝐓𝐞𝐱𝐚𝐬… | 𝐎𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫 𝐏𝐢𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢
SUMMARY★ the internet gets suspicious after Oscar Piastri’s childhood best friend shows up to the USA GP after swearing off races a year ago…
(multiple face claims)
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y/nusername home sweet home *read in southern mama accent*
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oscarpiastri: hey! no way i’m going to be there too what a coincidence!
➜ y/nusername: its not a coincidence im stalking you
➜ oscarpiastri: 😀 what.
y/nbff: tell me you’re joking
➜ y/nusername: lemme tell you something... LEMME TELL YOU SUMTHING!
user1234: why does @y/nbff sound mad? Did she not tell her bsf or something?
➜ user999: don’t quote me on this but i’m pretty sure it has to do with the drama about y/n and her ex.
➜ user 1234: wait what?!? Im new what is that???
➜ f1updatesfans: well like i think 2 years ago y/n was seen around with this guy while she was in Austin (her home town) for the USA race.
➜ f1updatesfans: Then suddenly he like disappeared and y/n didn’t go to another race since. but now apparently she’s going to this one??? it’s all very speculative but yeah.
➜ user1234: ok but what does y/n have to do with formula one? Wait was she dating a driver?
➜ f1updatesfans: No! I dont think so... And shes Oscar’s friend I think. Best friend.
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imessages- y/n's POV
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Once y/n got off of the plane and through the gate, she stood waiting for Oscar. Considering he was already in town for the race, he had no problem coming to get her. They were best friends after all.
y/n had a hand on her suitcase and leaned against a pillar. She looked worn out and utterly tired. Her eye bags could practically be called carry-on luggage. She rested her head on the wall and scrolled through her contacts before choosing Oscar's name.
Her phone only rang once before Oscar's voice answered from the other side.
"Hey, y/n." He said in his signature sweet tone that always made y/n smile. The corner of her mouth lifted at his voice while she closed her eyes. Maybe tired was an understatement.
She was exhausted. Usually she just sleeps on planes, but for the whole 6-hour trip she never dozed off. The closest she got was simply closing her eyes.
She couldn't sleep. Not when she was so worried about what would happen once she landed.
"Yeah, hey Oscar." she murmured, and let out a long yawn. "My gate is A6." She held her phone between her shoulder and cheek while she tried to fish out her wallet from her purse.
"You good? You sound tired. Or sad. I can't really tell over the phone." Oscar spoke through the speaker pressed up against her ear.
"Yes, I'm fine..." Once she found her wallet, she pulled out cash to buy something to drink at the mini market across from her gate.
"Oh, I see you! Stop walking I'm coming to your right now." Oscar said quickly. Y/n looked around her, trying to find him. Eventually, she spotted his familiar smile.
They both hung up the phone as Oscar got closer. He was smiling at her, almost smirking really. When he stood next to her, he took a moment to look at her state, no doubt remembering it to make fun of later.
Y/n smiled back and then continued walking to the minimarket, with Oscar alongside her.
Once she got her water, they both started walking towards the exit.
"Here, I can take this." Oscar stopped y/n and put his hand on top of her hand which was holding her suitcase. His touch felt familiar and warm. His hands always felt rougher than they looked, but y/n felt comfort in knowing it was Oscar. At first, she didn't speak.
She was too busy staring at their hands because something different was happening.
She felt different. Suddenly, she wanted his hand to never leave. She wanted his hand to grab hers and lace their fingers. She wanted his hand to touch her more.
She shook her head and looked away from their hands. She must be really tired, and sleep deprived.
Instead of agreeing verbally, y/n just let go, suddenly conscious of Oscar's burning touch, and nodded, letting him take her suitcase.
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ynusername airport fit check
photo credits: lando norris’s teammate, i think?
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oscarpiastri shut up
landonorris *my future boyfriend
➜ ynusername LANDO WHAT! is this a hard launch for you two???? wdym your bf
➜ landonorris WAIT HAHA NO I MEANT MY AS IT YOURS
➜ landonorris I WAS CORRECTING YOU AS YOU
➜ landonorris WAIT DONT
➜ landonorris i’m deleting this.
comment and thread deleted
comments on this post are limited
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imessages- oscar's POV
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imessage- oscar's POV
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"Who are you texting?" Y/n asked casually, wanting to start conversation. She sat comfortable in a sofa across from him. Originally, they were both laying down on the sofa's facing each other, a table in the middle.
But once Oscar got the first message, he sat up quickly.
At one point y/n caught him looking at her, with the most confused face she's seen on him, but he just went back to typing.
"What?" His head shot up from his phone, and his eyes got wide.
"I asked who you were texting." She replied. Y/n sat up slowly, matching him and then leaned in, with her elbows on her knees, hands clasped together.
"Oh. um. no one. Just Lando"
"Oh ok." This conversation was just making her more bored, and she wanted to talk to Oscar. There was a beat of silence before she spoke again. "What about?"
"Hmm?" Oscar seemed extremely distracted.
"What about?"
Instead of answering, he ran a hand through his hair and looked down. Y/n was going to ask what was wrong but he suddenly stood up and walked around the sofa.
He was still silent, and he changed positions to now stand behind the sofa and leaned on back, arm folded, facing away from her.
"Osc-" Y/n was going to ask why he was so distracted, but he cut her off.
He turned around, now looking her in the eye. "y/n can I ask you something?"
Now y/n was worried, because what could be on his mind that he needed to ask her about.
"Of course, Osc"
Oscar looked at her as she waited for his question. Like really looked at her. She was wearing Mclaren merch with his number on the back of course. She looked gorgeous. The realization made Oscar run a hand through his hair again, no doubt messing it up this time.
"It's kind of personal, y/n. I understand why you haven't said anything about it before. It's your personal life and I want you to know that i understand."
"Oscar what-"
"Is your ex in Austin?"
Y/n was surprised to say the least. She knew that questions about her past relationship would come up, but Oscar asking was surprising. She told him last year about how her ex broke up with her.
She was devastated. He had broken up with her over the phone, on the way back from last year's Austin Grand Prix. His reasons were stupid, and his apologies sounded incredibly forced.
She immediately called Oscar and told him everything. Well, everything except from his name. Oscar can be protective when it comes to y/n, so she kept her ex's name secret. It sounds stupid now that she thinks about it because even if Oscar did get mad, he would never do anything Y/n didn't like.
"Yeah. He's here, in Austin, but I haven't talked to him at all. You know what he did, and I want nothing to do with him." Y/n didn't know why she was trying to explain herself so much. She felt like she needed to make it known that there was nothing between her and her ex anymore. What this had to do with Oscar? she didn't know.
He nodded and walked towards her. They both sat next to each other on the small sofa while Oscar overthought everything.
"You want nothing to do with him? like at all? because Lando was making me think that you were possibly here to get back together with him..." He needed to know for sure.
"What? Oscar not of course. Why would Lando think that?"
"I don't know." he was going to run a hand through his hand for the third time, but y/n grabbed his wrist instead. She held his hand softly and intertwined their fingers.
Oscar felt relieved. Y/n was probably wondering why Oscar had so many sudden questions about her love life, but neither of them brought up the suddenness of the conversation. They instead sat close together; hands intertwined, hoping that the other couldn't tell how fast their heart is beating at the they're simple touch.
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oscarpiastri new merch that even I'd wear (it's a white shirt, get it?)
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ynusername cool now I have another shirt i can steal
➜ oscarpiastri get your own! https://mclaren.com
➜ oscarpiastri hope this helps!
➜ ynusername you're going to give it to me anyways I know it
➜ oscarpiastri probably...
landonorris @.ynusername where have you beeeeeen I haven't seen you all weekend
➜ ynusername clearing my calendar for you right now!
➜ landonorris tell oscar to stop keeping you to himself!!!
➜ oscarpiastri no go away
➜ landonorris *cough* jealous *cough*
➜ oscarpiastri 😐 that’s enough
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2 days later, and neither Y/n nor Oscar had made any progress on acknowledging their feelings. Even the internet and gossip columns knew more about it them each other.
a/n:
just a small smau i wanted to try. i’ve never done one of these types of stories, so sorry if its bad or confusing!
not sure if i’ll do a part 2…do we like?
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mangionebabymama · 1 day ago
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hey there! it’s “lulu feels too hard” anon back with another mini rant (not really a rant, more like an observation haha)
It’s in the same vein of him feeling emotions hard, but i think one thing that needs to be emphasized in this dynamic is how much he’s tried to subdue his emotions – and i don’t just mean recently. in many clips from his prep school days, like when he’s getting an award for example, you can see him smiling like a bit, but then cutting back to this neutral expression. Funny enough, it’s his eyebrows that always give him away loool. It’s similar to how he acts in the court hearing, full of expression, but then immediately goes back to a stoic, neutral expression. There’s even moments like this in some of the clips from Hawaii.
I guess my point is, how much was he taught to mask his emotions, and put up a front. It seems to me that he was brought up in a collective environment where the saying goes “always put your best foot forward, regardless of the circumstance”. I can understand this, coming from a family with similar values of “you represent the family name, your success is our success.”
i think though, that this seems to be what makes lulu resonate with so many of us: he’s empathetic, despite trying to be stoic. There’s a duality about him – the confident Ivy League scholar and the vulnerable, empathetic people pleasing boy who seeks affirmation one way or another.
but I think under this guise of putting your best foot forward, combined with a sense of always showing your masculinity that many guys of that age are pressured to do (and let’s not forget that for most of his schooling he attended an all boys school so there is that sort of “our boys” culture that’s pervasive in these realms), he had to hide the other part of him which felt so deeply, so hard.
it reminds me of one of his Reddit posts talking about his issues with Brain Fog, and how he initially never thought to talk about it with his friends, and instead masked it under this idea of “oh well, marks don’t matter for computer science majors” even though he was hurting and feeling so disappointed in himself to the point of contemplating dropping out. But the part that sticks out to me the most is what he said after in the post about even if you do end up telling them, if you wait too long, it’s almost like they won’t believe you (or something along those lines). And idk, that’s just such a heartbreaking way to think and it makes me sad for him. He internalized so much it seems. And truthfully, I’m not blaming anyone in his circle (family/friends) because I think part of it was also lulu never wanting to seem weak, which unfortunately clouded his vision of seeing that there were people who probably may have wanted to help. It’s just an all around sad circumstance :(
Sorry for the long write up, don’t feel like you need to provide a long response too! (haha i guess in some ways, i relate to lulu too :)
No, no, please don’t apologize for writing this, you captured this so well! 🥺 I wish I had more to add on, but you literally took all the words out of mine and emphasized on this beautifully.
I also think there’s that duality of having an internal vs. external struggle, where he could easily show and offer empathy towards others like it was nothing, but when it came to himself, it was a completely different story to extend grace. I know he had to internalize a lot, and the physical exertion of carrying all that weight on him had to have shown. I remember somebody mentioning how when he’s in deep thought in some photos, you see all the lines on his forehead—and there’s a lot of them, and once you notice them all crinkled, you’ll never not look at them in other photos. So, he literally has/had so much on his mind.
Reading that part of about his brain fog, about the irony of opening up too soon to your friends, fucked me up, to be truthful. I similarity dealt with this about two years ago, when I experienced two close familial deaths within a month before I started my senior year of college, and I was grieving hard. So many people that I know looked at me and considering my bereavement with the “strong Black woman” trope because I do have a strong personality, and I’ve experienced a lot of hardship in my life, so some felt like that I was gonna be alright, regardless, and kind of brushed off my grief like, “Oh, she’ll be alright, you’ve always managed to go through things” but no, lol. It’s the reality that I think, that many of the “strongest” friends in the group more often than not, face, surprisingly, contrary to belief—it happens all the time. When you’re commended to be a strong, resilient person, people don’t consider you to be weak, as in, you can’t persevere through struggles, but if you do, you’ll be fine, and the suffering won’t take much of an effect on you. But, like anyone else in this world, it still hurts, and it’s still acceptable to just give yourself the space to say that it sucks, and it hurts to be hurting. It’s sort of like, you have that universal perception of what it means to be hurt, but you can’t express that you’re hurt in the same breath.
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purplecoffee13 · 8 months ago
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The Silent Type*
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Summary: “Harry, the quiet guy in the office, has silently admired you during your time working for the firm. Now that your work there is done, Harry finds that he can’t let you go just yet…”
Wc: 5k
Tropes: colleagues (ceorry/nerdrry)
Warnings: SMUT, overstimulation, daddy kink, switch sub/dom dynamics, oral, choking
A/N: SUP Y’ALL!!!! God I have just been waiting to be able to write again! I still have some exams coming up next week, but I spent all evening writing this one shot because I have been dying to get back into it😋 This is my first time writing a more subrry tinted fic, so I hope you enjoy it!
General Masterlist
if you want to support me more than liking or sharing, you can consider buying me a coffee!
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Harry has never been one to talk much.
It is one of the reasons why he chose the career of software developing. Most of it, he could do on his own.
It wasn't so much that Harry hated people, he just preferred his own company. More people tend to complicate things, and Harry is a more logical guy.
That was until he met you.
About three months ago, the company for which Harry worked had started their expansion, and he was to lead the people transferred to that section of the firm. With the expansion also came new employees, and that’s where you came in.
You had been temporarily hired by the company to weed out applicants, and assist the current HR manager to help with the job interviews.
Harry still remembers that first day when you walked into the office, all nervous and fidgety. He had spotted you through the glass walls of his office, and couldn't physically tear his eyes off of you.
It wasn't until your third day helping in the office, that you actually met Harry. You had no idea what to think of him. Well, besides the obvious, of course. He was ridiculously handsome, and from the way he was staring at you, you figured that maybe he was thinking something like that about you too.
But he didn't talk.
Your first time meeting consisted of nothing but a gruff 'nice to meet you' from Harry's side, and no input in the rest of the conversation whatsoever. It was only a couple days later, when you asked the HR manager about it, that you found out that's just how he was, that he didn't really talk to anyone. From that moment on, there had been a surge of motivation to let him make you the one exception.
Harry was just fascinated by you, and he had no idea why. You were a ball of energy, talking so fast you'd think someone had clicked on your 'sped up' button, and you were chaotic, all over the place. The amount of times he watched you bump into people was impossible to keep count of.
Then, one day, you bumped into him. It should have angered him, the spilt coffee on his pants. But he had an extra suit, and you looked so worried, he didn't want to make you feel worse. You still felt bad, though, so you decided to make it up to him, and started getting him coffee every morning.
By the end of the first week, he looked you in the eyes when he thanked you. By the end of the fourth, he'd ask you how you are and recall things you'd told him. By the end of sixth, he told you things about his life, and by the end of the tenth week, you were having longer conversations with him.
It was difficult to keep up the small talk with him in the beginning. You soon found out that his lone wolf attitude may had something to do with his awkwardness. You thought, perhaps people weren't willing to work through that, and eventually he just stopped trying.
Such a prospect made you sad, and it only motivated you more to get to know him better. Of course, the longing glances, and standing unnecessarily close to each other with his knuckles barely touching your arm, those things helped too.
There was an undeniable tension between the two of you that you found incredibly difficult to decipher. The way he'd let you catch him looking at you gave it away quite clearly, but the lack of any real initiative confused you.
Had you read it all wrong? Did he even think there was something there too?
Unfortunately, there was no way to find out, as your assignment at the company was coming to an end. Today had been your last day, and tonight is a launch party to officially celebrate the expansion of the company.
You were a little sad to leave the company, especially since you really liked the people working there. It is why you are most excited for tonight.
Wearing a long yellow dress—it is your favorite color—you stride into the building. You are mesmerized by all the balloons and how pretty everyone looks. Wearing expensive suits or classy dresses. You immediately realize you might be a bit too happily dressed; everyone is wearing darker colors.
It does make it easy for everyone to spot you, though. By the time you've gotten your drink, five people have already walked up to you. About half an hour into the party, the CEO of the company takes the stage to give a small speech.
"I would like to thank everyone who has participated in making this expansion go as smoothly as it did. Your work does not go unnoticed." He says through the microphone. Everyone claps for a few seconds, and the man waits to go on until it is quiet again.
"Now, I have a special announcement to make. I have wanted to make this expansion happen since I began working for this company in 1988. Now that I finally have, I feel that my job at this firm is done. And so, I have decided to retire from my position as CEO."
Your eyes widen at the speech; you had no idea this was even a thing. By the sound of the gasps and murmurs traveling through the room, you deduce that the news is unexpected for the rest of the company as well.
"It is also with great pride that I present the new CEO of our company, chosen after careful consideration. If mr. Harry Styles could please join me on stage."
Your mouth falls open at the mention of Harry's name, and you are certain you will never be able to close it again when you see him walking onto the stage. He wears a black suit, perfectly tailored to his body, and the sight of him has you concerned that you may be drooling.
The bald man hands the microphone to Harry, who does not look very pleased to be on stage; it almost seems like he is regretting his decisions. Until his eyes meet yours, that is when you see him let out a breath.
"Thank you, Mr. Johnson." He says, breaking eye contact to look at his former boss.
Right, that was his name, Johnson.
"I look forward to leading this company into more successes, and I promise that I will put my heart and soul into it. I have worked at this firm ever since I graduated college and they offered me a job during my internship, and it is safe to say that I have not regretted that decision a day of my life. I have always been loyal to this company, and I will remain loyal to you. Thank you."
You are perplexed. Why did he never tell you about this? You are very happy for him, but you do find it weird. It also makes you doubt again. Did whatever you had been building up the last months not mean as much to Harry as it did to you?
Well, it doesn't really matter, you're gone after tonight anyway.
Once the shock of the news has calmed down a bit, the party resumes as normal. Most people visit Harry one by one to congratulate him on the position, but you steer clear from him. It is no use, after tonight you will probably never see him again anyway.
Time passes, and you think you're ready to go home. There was a file in the office you forgot to sign earlier today, so you head up to do that first. The office is entirely dark when you walk out of the elevator. It's kind of eerie, so you are quick to turn on the lights.
It takes you a few minutes to find the file, since the receptionist placed it on someone else's desk. You find it on your colleague's desk, and walk over to the receptionist desk to sign it. Laying it on the keyboard of her computer, you pray that she won't displace it again, and make your way back to the elevators.
A loud shriek escapes you when Harry suddenly walks around the corner. He covers his ears at the high pitched sound, shocked by how much he scared you. With your hand on your chest you try and steady your breathing.
"Jesus, you scared the crap out of me."
"Sorry, didn't mean to." He says, a bit of worry in his tone. You look up at him.
"What are you even doing up here?"
"I was looking for you." He shrugs.
"Why?" Your eyebrows furrow, that same old tension in your stomach settling like it does every time Harry looks at you for longer than two seconds.
"You've been avoiding me." He answers casually, and you feel your heart drop. You didn't think he'd catch onto it.
"Congratulations by the way, for being the CEO. That was definitely a surprise." There is a bitterness in your tone. It is Harry's turn to frown. He hears the condescension, but his mind can't seem to come to a conclusion. Why are you angry? It's so hard to tell.
This is why he doesn't do people.
"You're mad that I am CEO?" He guesses, and your mouth falls open, much like it did when Harry's new position got announced.
"What?! Of course not! I'm very happy for you." You sputter out. The last thing you'd want him to think is that you don't want him to be happy or satisfied or successful.
"But you're still avoiding me." He repeats slowly. "You know, I didn't tell you about it because no one was supposed to know. I had to sign for it and everything. It's nothing personal."
The painful grip that his potential distrust in you had on your heart releases at the sound of his words. You could have known that it was due to something like that, you work in HR after all. That fact alone makes you realize how invested you unknowingly had become in Harry.
"I...I figured." You give him a weak smile. Harry's eyes search for yours, holding onto your gaze once he has found it. You stay like that, staring at each other for a while until you break the silence.
"I'm heading home. I don't think I'll see you again, so good luck. I'm sure you'll do wonderfully."
With much difficulty, you manage to look away from Harry and walk past him. At least, you try to, because halfway through, Harry's hand grabs your arm. You stop in your tracks, looking back at the man who stopped you. The man who has been sending you mixed signals for the past few months.
"D– do you want to join me in my office?"
You refrain from the shiver that threatens to run down your entire body, and nod. Harry's hand slides down your arm to your hand, and he intertwines his fingers with yours before he leads you to the glass doors that belong to him. On your way there, he flicks off the lights, leaving the two of you in the dark.
The city lights light up the otherwise pitch dark office that belongs to Harry, for now. He will be moved to the CEO's office when he starts his new position.
You don't say anything as Harry closes the door, or as he walks to the closet and pulls out a bottle of whiskey and two glasses. You wait in anticipation of what he's going to do.
But then he sits down. He just sits down on his chair.
You stand there, staring at him, utterly confused about this man and his intentions with you, while he obliviously pours the whiskey into the glasses. In that moment, there is a switch inside of you, one that says: fuck it. This is your last day, you need a way to release this pent up tension, and you probably won't see him ever again after this. What have you got to lose? Nothing.
You walk over to the desk and sit down on it, extremely close to Harry. The split of your dress shows your bare, freshly shaved leg, and he seems to notice. His eyes pull to your legs like magnets, and he has to force himself to look you in the eyes as he hands you the glass of whiskey.
You try your best not to smirk at the effectiveness of your plan, focusing on your next move instead. Straight for the kill.
"So, why am I here, Harry?" You ask nonchalantly, taking a sip of your whiskey. It tastes quite strong, and it takes you a lot of effort not to have an expressive reaction to it.
"What?" He asks, eyes wide like a deer in headlights.
"Why'd you take me here?" You ask again, setting down your glass at the table before moving to stand in front of him. "To admire the view?"
Harry looks out the window, but his head shoots back to you when he notices you're sinking onto your knees in front of him. He thinks he may have forgotten to breathe as he observes the lustful look in your eyes. His eyes travel down to your tits, even more visible from this angle.
"Because I've admired it every day for the past three months." You continue. Harry swallows, frozen by the overload of his brain and the sensitivity of the growing constraint in these pants. "Why don't you take your pants off for me? Just enough to give me your cock. I like you in this suit."
Harry doesn't let another second fly by before he is unbuckling his pants, sliding it down just enough for you to have access to his cock and his balls. Your mouth waters at the size and girth of it, your cunt getting wetter with every passing moment.
You shimmy forward, leaning over his cock and grabbing it with your hand. Harry sighs at the minimal contact, making you feel even more powerful. Looking up at him through your lashes, you ask him one more question.
"You'll hold my hair, won't you?"
With that, you take Harry in your mouth as far as you can, before pulling away from him. A gasp leaves his mouth, and his eyes fall shut as you pump him with your hand while your mouth kisses and sucks on the head of his cock. You begin licking and kissing down his cock, while your hand softly feels up his balls.
Harry feels like he is in heaven already, and he forgets everything around him. It is only when you completely remove yourself from him that he opens his eyes again, and he sees. Catching on quickly, he leans forward and gathers your hair, twisting it around his palm.
Satisfied with Harry's obedience, your mouth attaches itself to his cock again. You take him slowly, teasingly, and move your head up and down. With every movement, you take him an inch deeper.
"Oh, f–fuck!" He groans out when you gag on him because you took yourself too far too fast. You steady your breathing, which is a bit more complicated as you can only breathe out your nose. You resume sucking him off for a bit longer, bobbing your head down a bit faster. The small sounds that leaves Harry's lips, along with his scrunched up face, gives you enough indication that he is approaching his climax.
So you remove your mouth from his cock.
He lets out a whine at the loss of contact. If your panties weren't wet before, they certainly are now. You smile at the state of him; desperate and needy for you. The fact that you've managed to make him fall apart like this makes you incredibly horny.
"I want to take all of you in my mouth, daddy." You tell him, looking up at him with your big eyes. "You'll have to help me."
You went out on a bit of a limb when you decided to call him daddy, but he doesn't seem to mind at all. In fact, Harry's eyes light up and his jaw slacks at the mention of the pet name.
"Shit– anything, sweetheart. Whatever you need." He croaks out.
"I need you to fuck my mouth." You respond sternly, not wasting any time and taking him between your lips again. You push yourself down his cock as far as you can, breathing deeply before moving your hand to Harry's hand, which is holding onto your hair, and pushing your head forward to indicate that he needs to push his cock down your throat.
Again, it doesn't take him long to listen, because Harry's hips thrust forward, his dick gliding into your throat. You moan at the force with which he pushed, and keep your mouth wide open as you let Harry navigate your head.
Once he fully understands that you are allowing him to let him use your mouth, the true fun begins. With the firm grip he has on your head, he pushes you up and down at an ungodly speed. Your jaw is already tiring from its locked position, but you power through it because the sounds that leave Harry's mouth make up for it.
"Fuck baby, such a good mouth. Never had anything like this... Jesus!" He pants out as he begins to thrust up into your mouth, and you feel like you might pass out. Suddenly, he pulls you away from his dick.
You frown, and realize as he is grabbing for a tissue that he is avoiding messing up your face. You don't stand for it, though, and wrap your lips around his cock again just in time for him to come inside your mouth. You take him deeper and feel the way his sperm shoots in the back of your throat.
"Fuck! Shit, shit..." The not so wide arrange of curse words are the only thing Harry is capable of saying as he dumps his load inside your mouth. The fact that you were so adamant about having his sperm in your mouth made his orgasm even more intense.
Your mouth lets go of his cock with an exaggerated plop, and you swallow every last bit of him, grinning at his fucked out face.
"That was... amazing." He sighs, his gaze flicking from your mouth to your eyes. You hum in agreement, and get up from the floor as he pulls up his pants. You are about to walk away, when Harry grabs your wrist.
"Where are you going?"
"Home." You answer with a smile, but Harry's grip on you only tightens. He shakes his head, his lips pouting.
"No, you need to stay. Let me make you feel good too." He protests. You squint your eyes at him.
"I don't need to do anything."
Harry's eyes widen. "You're right. But just let me make you feel good before you go, please? It's the least I can do."
Your mouth slowly forms into a grin, glad to have him where you want. Well, almost.
"Beg me."
Harry scoffs. "Are you serious? I don't really do begging."
You shrug, smiling at him. "That's fine. My vibrator can get me off too."
You take a few steps towards the door, while Harry contemplates his decisions. However, those were all clouded by the sole moment to please you the second you mentioned your vibrator. The image of you getting off like that is too much to bear. He needs to do it for you.
"Stop." He says. You turn around, and walk back to him as he gets out of his chair and gets on his knees. Grabbing your waist, he pulls you closer, his nose digging into your dress. His hands run up and down your legs, and it is making you weak in your knees.
"Please, let me eat you out baby. I'll do anything to make you feel good. I need to taste you so bad, please let me pleasure you."
You swallow, eyelids ready heavy, as you sigh out. "Alright."
Harry grins at your admittance of defeat, and stands up. He leads you to sit on his desk, your dress hiked up. He removes the stuff behind you, so that you can lean back entirely in case you want to, and waltzes over to his chair.
Spreading your legs, he rolls himself closer to you, and assesses your soaking wet panties. Chuckling, he leans to the side and grabs a pair of scissors, before he cuts the skimpy material from your body. You'd say something of it, but the sight of him admiring your pussy like this is too fascinating to interrupt. So, you keep quiet.
When Harry's thumb suddenly presses on your clit and begins to rub it, you can't help but gasp. His touch feels too good, and that blowjob got you really worked up.
"You have no idea how many times I've fantasized about this." Harry says, marveling at how reactive you are being.
"Me too."
His eyebrows rise up. "Yeah? Tell me more, baby."
You bite your lip, too obsessed with the pet name he's given you. It sounds so sexy coming from his mouth. He awaits your response with bright eyes, lazily rubbing your clit.
"Your arms... I'd think about them so much. And your hands, I'd imagine you choking me with them. They're so big..." You begin, and you know that you could go on for hours if you had to tell him about everything you've thought about doing with him, or doing to him.
Harry doesn't say anything, instead responds with two fingers entering your pussy. You moan at the feeling of his large fingers pumping in and out of you. It feels way fuller than your hand already. His two fingers is the equivalent of your three fingers.
"We can definitely make those fantasies come true..." Harry says softly. "But first, let's make you come, hmm?"
You nod, your head falling back and allowing yourself to fully indulge in the pleasure Harry's giving you right now. You let yourself lay on his desk, wrapping your legs around his shoulders.
"Fuck, that feels good– oh fuck!" You shriek out when Harry tongue begins attacking your tongue after he adds a third finger. He speeds up the movements of his hand to match those of his tongue, and holds onto that tempo until your mind can't conjure up any more words to speak to him.
With the control entirely out of your hands, you let Harry guide you to your orgasm, which washes over your body like a tidal wave. You unconsciously push Harry's head further into your pussy with your legs. With an arched back, you moan at the sensitivity of your clit.
Harry lets you take a minute to catch your breath before he pulls on your arms to have you sit up straight. He is smiling sweetly at you, and your heart warms at it.
"You okay?" He asks, kissing your hands. You nod, trying to ignore the flutters in your heart at the way he is being so gentle.
"Thank you for letting me make you feel good, baby." He says, getting up and leaning into your face. His nose brushes against your cheek as he plants his lips on yours. Your arms wrap around Harry's neck as you kiss him deeper, too caught up in how good he feels and how much you want him.
You're never this greedy. You've never felt like you needed a man's cock inside of you. Like it was the only feasible option. You feel it driving you crazy, and you're sure it is the only reason you say— no, ask:
"Please, fuck me."
The grin that forms on Harry's lips makes you feel like you should regret what you said. A grin like that usually belongs on your face in situations like these. But you need him so bad, you don't really care that you are the desperate one this time.
"Oh, you're begging now too, huh?" He says cockily. You glare at him, pissed that he's acknowledging your neediness and mocking you for it too.
"It's alright baby, I'll give it to you. 'M cock's already hard again from watching you come like that. So fucking sexy..." He says. He pulls his pants down and lifts you off the table, turning you around to the glass windows and pushing your hands against them. "Bend over a bit and speak your legs for me, baby."
You do as he says, biting your lip at Harry's hand that pushes away your dress and roams over your ass. He positions his cock at your entrance and pushes himself into you, sighing in pure relief. You shut your eyes tightly at the size of him filling you up.
"Fuck, you feel good baby." He says, slowly beginning to move in and out a bit. You let out a soft 'yes', causing Harry's jaw to clench. He spanks your ass, watching as it bounces from the impact, and his cock twitching at your yelp.
"Perfect fucking ass... perfect fucking girl, aren't you?" He groans, now lazily thrusting into you. He wants to give you time to adjust, but he learns your wishes when you begin to push yourself back into him.
"Ah, I see. Greedy girl wants to speed things up, hmm? Your wish is my command." He mocks, but does speed up his pace. His hands hold your waist as he begins to pound himself into you, your ass shaking at the impact. He spanks your ass again for good measure, obsessed with the way it moves.
You nearly lose yourself in how good it feels, but you know that he can get deeper than this.
"I want to ride you... want to feel you in my tummy." You spit out, hoping he understands what you're saying in your croaky voice.
Harry listens, pulling himself out of you immediately and taking a seat in the chair. You turn around and walk over to him, throwing your legs on both sides of his lap, before grabbing his cock and sinking yourself down on it.
It goes smoother this time, but Harry's really deep now, just like you wanted. The sensation is everything to you, and it isn’t hard to tell how good it feels for him too. Glad to have a bit of the control back, you start to bounce on his cock.
Harry’s eyes travel over your body, fascinated by the way you are moving above him. His hands travel to the straps of your dress and push them down until he can get your tits out of the top part of your dress. He begins to massage them as you keep impaling yourself on his dick over and over again.
"Fuck, daddy, you feel so good... so good for me. Listening to me. Knew this was the best way to fuck you... you love it." You slur happily. Harry nods profusely at your words, jaw clenched and moaning out in pleasure.
"Yes, needed it so bad baby. You're fucking daddy so good..."
You smile at how caught up Harry looks in his pleasure, like he doesn't know what to do with it. You, however, do know what to with it. You grab one of his hands and wrap it around your throat, before you do the same to him. With his hand on your neck and yours on his, you begin to fuck him as fast as you can.
"Ah, fffuck... shit! Holy shit!" He yells out, and automatically thrusts himself up into you, reaching an even further level of deepness you had never thought possible. That along with your hands on each other’s necks, is enough to know that your climaxes are near.
"Come inside me daddy." You pant out, and he does. It is as if your permission set him off. You smile in delight at the feel and knowledge of his cum being so deep inside of you.
You fuck Harry through his orgasm, and even after. He squirms in his seat. "Wait— too sensitive."
"I don't care, I haven't come yet. Don't you want to make me feel good? Have me coming around your thick cock?" You say sensually, and Harry nods. "Words."
"Yes– fuck! I want you to come, please come around my cock. Please, please..." He begins to beg, a tear rolling down his cheek.
Your toes curl at his whiny voice, and soon your juices are gushing all over his cock. Your pussy contracting around him seems to set Harry off even more, as you feel even more sperm spraying out of his dick and into your walls.
You ride out your high until you can't move anymore. You sit there, forehead pressed against Harry's as you both come down from what just happened.
After a minute or two, you decide to pull out. Slowly but surely, you manage to get Harry's dick out of you without hissing too much at the sensitivity of every single body part down there.
You lean against the desk, too wobbly to stand on your own, and you let Harry wipe you clean with the tissues on his desk. After cleaning himself up, he stands up and positions himself in front of you.
"Hey." He says. Your hand cups his jaw and your thumb wipes away the tear that is far down his face now.
"Hi." You tilt your head. The both of you burst out laughing, still surprised by what went down just now.
"That was really good." He says once the laughter has died down. You nod in agreement.
"Good enough for a repeat?"
Harry pretends to think it over, before he responds: "under one condition."
"And what would that be?" You quirk up an eyebrow, intrigued by his vagueness. He smiles at you so wide that you wonder if his mouth might be hurting.
"You let me take you out on a date first."
You roll your eyes, pretending not to be amused as he chuckles at your reaction. But the second you see the look on his face and the sincerity behind it, you realize that he is being quite serious about this request. You bite your lip, wanting to kiss him right then and there.
"I would love that."
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gf2bellamy · 15 days ago
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fear — spencer reid
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader ( no use of y/n ) summary: after a difficult day at work, spencer is now convinced that continuing to date you puts your life in danger. content warnings: mention of death, talking about an officer watching his girlfriend die, lots of angst and sadness a/n: hello why did i break my own heart writing this
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Spencer ascended the stairs to your apartment, each step feeling heavier than the last.
Cases always took something from him, left invisible scars no one else could see. But this one? This one had carved into him deeper than most. 
By the time he reached your floor, he stopped, staring at your door at the end of the hall. His hand gripped the keys you’d given him months ago, the metal cold against his skin.
You had handed them to him with a soft smile, saying it just made sense considering how often he stayed over. He remembered the warmth in your eyes, the way you’d trusted him so easily. 
But now, standing outside your apartment, that memory only added to the knot in his chest. 
This case hadn’t just been hard—it had been devastating. The victim’s name echoed in his mind: a woman who had been vibrant, kind, and full of life until her boyfriend—a detective working the case—had been unable to protect her.
The unsub had used her as leverage, exploiting the detective’s devotion to gain the upper hand.
And just like that, she was gone. 
Spencer had watched the man crumble. The detective had blamed himself for being too close, for caring too much, for letting his personal life overlap with his work. 
It hit too close to home for Spencer. 
He took another step forward, his heart pounding as he stared at your door. His fingers tightened around the keys, and for a moment, he debated turning back. 
The words the detective had said haunted him. “If I hadn’t loved her, she’d still be alive. I should’ve kept my distance.” 
Spencer couldn’t stop thinking about it. Was he putting you at risk just by being with you? His job didn’t allow him to separate personal and professional—every case bled into his life.
Every loss, every fear, every failure. And if one day his work found its way to you? He didn’t think he could survive that. 
He unlocked the door, the familiar sound of the tumblers clicking echoing loudd in the quiet hallway.
The soft light spilling from the kitchen gave the space a warmth that felt almost jarring after the day he’d had. 
His gaze found you instantly, your back turned as you moved around the kitchen. You were making tea. 
He must’ve made some noise, maybe the soft click of the door closing or the shuffle of his feet, because you turned around. 
The second your eyes landed on him, your face lit up with a smile so genuine it made his heart ache. 
“Spence,” you said softly, setting down your cup without hesitation. You crossed the room in a few quick steps, your arms already reaching for him as you enveloped him in a tight hug. 
Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him close, while his instinctively settled around your waist. For a moment, he just stood there, letting himself be held.
You smelled like chamomile tea and faint traces of your favorite lotion—comforting and familiar. 
“You’re home,” you murmured against his shoulder, your voice filled with quiet relief. 
He swallowed hard, his throat tight with emotion. “Yeah,” he managed to whisper, his voice barely audible. 
You pulled back just enough to look up at him, your hands sliding down to rest on his shoulders. Your brows knit together as you studied his face. “Rough day?” 
He nodded slowly, his hazel eyes dark and heavy with exhaustion. “You could say that,” he admitted. 
Your fingers moved to his face, brushing a stray curl from his forehead as you searched his expression. “Do you want to talk about it?” 
He hesitated.
“I don’t know,” he said honestly, his voice soft. He stared at you for a long moment, his heart aching with a mix of love and guilt. 
You studied him carefully, your brows furrowing as you tried to read him. Something was off—more than just the usual weight he carried after a hard case.
He wasn’t just tired; he was troubled, deeply so. 
“Do you want tea?” you asked gently, hoping to coax him into some sense of comfort. 
He shook his head, his movements stiff, almost mechanical. “I, uh…” he stuttered, his voice unusually small. “I’m not staying,” he mumbled, barely loud enough for you to hear. 
The words hit you like a jolt, and your hand, which had been resting lightly on his arm, fell away.
“Oh,” you breathed out, the single syllable heavy with confusion and concern. “Why? Are you okay?” 
You tilted your head slightly, searching his face for an explanation, but he barely met your gaze. His eyes darted everywhere but to yours. 
“I think we—” he started, then stopped abruptly. His jaw clenched as he closed his eyes, as though trying to summon the strength to get the words out. “I think we should break up,” he finally said, his voice cracking under the weight of it. 
Your mouth fell open in shock, the air suddenly feeling thick and hard to breathe. “What?” you whispered, barely able to process what you’d just heard. 
“I…” Spencer’s voice faltered as he ran a trembling hand through his curls, his shoulders slumping. “I just think it’s for the best,” he murmured, still refusing to meet your gaze. 
“For the best?” you repeated, your voice rising slightly in disbelief. “Spencer, what are you talking about? Did I do something wrong?” 
“No!” he said quickly, almost too loudly. He flinched at his own outburst, finally glancing at you before looking away again, his guilt written all over his face. “It’s not you. It’s not anything you did. It’s me. My job. My… everything.” 
“What?” you repeated, your voice barely above a whisper, laced with confusion and disbelief. You stared at him, trying to make sense of the words he was saying, but they didn’t seem real. Your brain felt foggy, like it was struggling to keep up with what was happening. 
Your chest tightened as you fought to hold back the tears threatening to spill over. You couldn’t believe this was happening.
Not now, not like this. 
Spencer still wouldn’t meet your eyes. His gaze darted to the floor, to the wall, back to the floor—anywhere but at you.
But occasionally, his eyes flickered up, and in those fleeting moments, you saw it. The pain. The guilt. His own tears welling just behind his lashes. 
“Spence,” you said again, your voice breaking as you bit down on your lip to steady yourself. 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, so softly it was almost inaudible.
You shook your head, your brow furrowing as you stared at him, searching for some kind of explanation. “Where is this coming from?” you asked, the tremor in your voice betraying the effort it took to hold yourself together. 
“Why, Spence?” you pressed, your voice rising slightly, tinged with desperation. “Why are you doing this? I don’t understand.” 
His lips parted, but no sound came out. He seemed to struggle, as if the words he wanted to say were caught somewhere in his throat. He dragged a hand through his curls, a shaky breath escaping him as he finally forced himself to speak. 
“I don’t want to lose you,” he said, his voice raw with emotion. 
You blinked, your tears finally spilling over. “Lose me?” you repeated, your voice breaking. “Spencer, what are you talking about? You’re the one pushing me away right now!” 
He winced at your words, his head bowing as though they physically hurt him. “Because I’m trying to protect you,” he said, his voice cracking. 
“Protect me?” You shook your head, utterly bewildered. “From what? Spencer, I don’t need protecting. I just need you.” 
His head snapped up then, his eyes finally locking onto yours, and the sheer pain in his gaze nearly broke you. 
“You don’t understand,” he said, his voice shaky. “This job—it’s dangerous. Every day, I see how fragile life is, how quickly it can be taken away. I see people lose the ones they love because of… because of monsters like the ones we chase. And I—” He stopped, his voice catching. “I can’t let that happen to you. I can’t let you get hurt because of me.” 
You stared at him, stunned into silence for a moment. Then you took a step closer, your voice trembling. 
“And what about me?” you asked. “Do you think it’ll hurt less if you leave? Do you think I’ll stop worrying about you just because you’re not here anymore? Spencer, I’ll still love you. I’ll still worry. The only difference is I’ll have to do it alone.” 
Spencer shook his head, his curls bouncing slightly with the movement as a tear slipped free and traced a path down his cheek.
His lips parted, trembling with the weight of his words. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice cracking. “I’m really sorry.” He repeated it, the words tumbling out of him like a mantra as if saying them enough times would make it all hurt less. 
And then he took a step back. 
“Spencer,” you uttered, your voice so quiet, so heartbreakingly fragile that it felt like it could shatter under the weight of the moment.
It was a sound he would not forget—a sound that would haunt him. 
His gaze flickered to your face, and when he saw the tears freely falling down your cheeks, his breath caught in his throat. You weren’t trying to hide them. You weren’t even wiping them away.
They were just there and it was his fault. 
He couldn’t believe that he was the reason for your pain. The reason for the hurt that now etched itself into every inch of your expression.
But he told himself it was for you. He told himself it was for your safety. 
Spencer cleared his throat, his voice hollow as he tried to explain. “There was an officer on this case,” he began, his words slow and deliberate, as though forcing himself to relive it. “He was one of the first responders to the crime scenes. Dedicated. Smart. He had been working the case for weeks, just like us.” 
You stayed silent, your watery eyes locked on his face as you listened. 
Spencer took another shaky breath, running a hand through his curls in frustration. “He had a girlfriend,” he said, his voice cracking on the word. “She wasn’t involved. She had nothing to do with the case—she wasn’t even in law enforcement. But somehow…” He trailed off, swallowing hard. 
“Somehow the unsub found out about her,” he continued, his voice barely above a whisper. “And he—” Spencer stopped, his hands balling into fists at his sides. “He used her to get to him. Killed her. Right in front of him.” 
Your breath hitched, as you took in the horror of his words. 
Spencer’s tears were falling freely now, his voice trembling as he kept going. “I saw the officer after it happened. He was… broken. Completely destroyed. And I kept thinking… that could be me. That could be you.” 
“Spencer,” you said softly, but he shook his head, cutting you off. 
“You don’t understand,” he said, his voice rising slightly in frustration—not at you, but at himself. “Every single day, I walk into work knowing that I could lose someone I care about. Knowing that I could be the reason they’re gone. And if that someone, is you—” His voice cracked again, and he looked away, unable to finish the sentence. 
“But it won’t be me, Spence,” you said, your voice trembling but determined. You took a small step closer, desperate to reach through the wall he was building around himself. “It doesn’t have to be me. We don’t have to let fear decide this for us.” 
He didn’t respond, his jaw tightening as he stared down at the floor. You could see the battle raging within him—the love he felt for you colliding with the fear that had taken root in his heart. 
“Spence,” you said again, softer this time. “I know you’re scared. I know you’ve seen things I can’t even imagine. But just because something terrible happened to someone else doesn’t mean it’s going to happen to us. It doesn’t mean I’m going to get hurt.” 
He finally looked up at you, and the anguish in his eyes was enough to shatter your heart all over again. 
“You don’t know that,” he said, his voice low but steady, like he was forcing himself to say the words out loud. “You can’t know that.” 
You swallowed hard, your hands trembling as you reached for him again. “No, I don’t know that,” you admitted, your voice breaking. “But you don’t know it will happen either. We don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that. No one does.” 
He closed his eyes for a moment, exhaling deeply. “This is about protecting you.” he said quietly, shaking his head. “It’s about making sure that you don’t end up another name, another victim, because of me.” 
You stared at him, the weight of his words pressing down on you. “But you’re hurting me now,” you whispered, tears slipping down your cheeks. “You’re so afraid of something that might never happen that you’re pushing me away before it even has a chance to.” 
Spencer flinched as if you had physically struck him, his shoulders sagging. He dragged a hand down his face, letting out a shaky breath. 
“I’d rather you hate me for this,” he said finally, his voice barely audible, “than lose you because of me.” 
The silence between you was deafening. You stood there, your tears falling freely now as the meaning of his words sank in.
He wasn’t going to change his mind. No matter how much it hurt him, no matter how much it hurt you, he was convinced this was the right thing to do. 
“Spencer,” you said, your voice breaking, “please don’t do this.” 
His breath hitched, and for a moment, it looked like he might break—like he might give in to the love that was so clearly written all over his face.
But then he closed his eyes, shaking his head as he stepped back once more. 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice trembling with the weight of his decision. “I’m so, so sorry.” 
And with that, he turned and walked toward the door, his footsteps heavy with regret. He paused for just a moment as he reached for the doorknob, his hand lingering.
But then he opened the door.
When he stepped out, the sound of it closing behind him was like the final nail in the coffin. 
You stood there, frozen in place, staring at the spot where he had just been. Your chest ached, your hands trembling as you tried to process what had just happened. 
Spencer Reid—the man you loved, the man who loved you—was gone. And no amount of love or pleading had been enough to stop him. 
So you stood there, letting the tears fall, your heart breaking for both of you. Because even though he had made his choice, you knew that he was walking away just as shattered as you were. 
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clare-875 · 5 months ago
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Wait, I'm Sorry (Gojo Satoru x Reader)
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_____ Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Female Reader Summary: You get hurt after an argument. Warnings: Angst/Fluff, Descriptions of injury, some swearing, Gojo being kind of unreasonable in the beginning, Canonical violence [JJK Masterlist] _____
The atmosphere was tense within your home. You hated it, you hated feeling the trepidation churn in your chest as you watched silently Gojo's unusually rigid form. You are standing as you look at him sitting on the living room sofa and his sharp eyes glowing with his anger. They are trained purposefully on the ground before him, like he hadn't just spat cruel words at you. Suddenly, the lovely evening that was supposed to be spent felt heavy with the built-up tension. Suddenly, the beautiful dress you picked up and the makeup you perfected on your face was ruined with tears and the angst of the evening. What had happened? What had happened to the compliments on your form earlier that evening, the words "stunning," "beautiful," and "love" whispered in your ear. What had happened to his arm wrapped around your waist as he took you on your weekly date? What happened to the flowers that still lay within a vase, your favourites, ones he had given you mere hours ago. Why was he being so cruel now, because of something you couldn't control.
"Satoru, I'm telling you, you're overreacting." Your voice is sullen now as your tears make exhaustion creep up on you after the half-hour spent now arguing. "He was just-" Satoru's eyes are narrowed as they turn to you quickly, and your heart drops at the sight of his irritation. It was a sight of anger you never had seen pointed at you, and you felt sadness creep up at the fact that now you knew what it was like; what it was like to have the 'strongest's' eyes look at you in a way that didn't reflect love and devotion. "You didn't see him [y/n]! He was basically undressing you with his eyes in front of me!" You groan now sharp irritation ringing in the back of your head at the same scenario brought back and forth. "And what did you do?! You fucking smiled at him!" Your body is now consumed with rage as you turn to your boyfriend and his incessant words, his blunt and stubborn reasoning. "Yes Satoru, I smiled because he was our fucking WAITER, and he was being polite!"
Satoru rolls his eyes.
"You know what, I'm done." You turn, lips tugging downward at his childishness that returns when he can't see reason past his daftness. "Come get me when you actually want to have an adult conversation about this." You gather your purse and make a beeline for the door, but Satoru's eyes are still trained on you angrily. "[y/n], I'm not done with-" You turn to him sharply then, your own anger and disappointment seeping into your gaze, seeping into his eyes. "I'm done." With that, you slam the door closed and you leave Satoru looking wide-eyed at the spot you just were. He feels an unfamiliar grip on his chest as he looks at the lack of you now in his home following the lack of a beautiful evening. But Satoru can't help it. Even if it had all been in his mind and even if he had taken it too far, all he imagines are his eyes looking at you with a spark of desire he knew too well. All he saw was his smirk, one that rose subtly enough so that only Satoru could see. All he saw was your angelic smile pointed at him like his thoughts were shrouded with the mere innocence of pouring you another drink. So, Satoru stays put despite his body telling him to get you before you leave.
But he remembers your eyes, angry and disappointed.
You, on the other hand, make your way to Shoko's place and she is surprised when she sees your tear-stained face at her doorway but ushers you in. "What did Gojo do this time?" Her eyes are narrowed as she thinks of the white-haired man, so undeserving of you, or at least in her mind he was. You wipe your eyes quickly and shake your head letting out a long sigh. "It was so stupid." You mutter disbelievingly at the ceiling as Shoko nods her head in grim understanding. "Well, you're welcome to stay the night, you know that." You smile gratefully at your best friend as you nod slowly. "Thanks, Shoko." She grins half-heartedly as you watch her go back into the depths of her home and see the swipe of her hand as she pulls out a cigarette, leaving you be. However, when you got yourself ready to go to bed that night, you slept terribly and he did too. You hated it; the lack of his warm arms and the cheesy lines he'd say before bed. He hated it; the lack of your sweet words and your loving gaze lulling him to sleep. He would apologise in the morning, he thought to himself.
But he never got the chance.
You were awoken to a call early in the morning and your eyes were weary as they shot to your bright phone in the depths of the dark dawn. You half expected it to be Satoru, but when you look, you see that it is a number retained for your work. Sure enough, when you pick up, it is for a job to exorcise a grade-two curse causing a reign of terror in a nearby abandoned hospital. You were a semi-grade one sorcerer and the only one with an apt grade who was free for the day. You sigh heavily and despite thinking you would have the day free, you decide that maybe you could use a win. So, you leave a note for Shoko thanking her and asking her to inform Satoru if she has the chance. Then, you quickly make your way to the Jujutsu High School for your uniform and further details. However, when you finally do make it to the abandoned hospital in the early shine of the rising sun, you notice instantly that something is wrong. You feel it brimming within the atmosphere, an untold power, an untold curse that felt too strong to be a second-grade curse. But before you can contemplate the situation further. A curse appears from the depths of the floor.
You quickly ready your weapon and soon, there is a multitude of smaller curses building upon smaller ones, gurgling incoherently and its disfigured form towering over you. You grit your teeth but ready your cursed technique. This wasn't the one you were worried about. You dodge an incoming attack and strike your weapon, but you defeat the curse after only a small number of attacks. Soon, all that is left is a muddle of its remains slowly disappearing into the floor, but this was all too easy. You know the fight's not over, and you are right. "Help me." You turn quickly at the sound of a child's voice in the barren hallway, your eyes sparking wildly at the trembling of it. The reports said nothing about hostages. "Help me, please." You start to run swiftly through the cool corridors left with built-up mould and cracks. You follow the voice as it calls out to you louder now, more rapidly.
Thinking back, you really should have been a bit more weary.
As you rip open a door, the sound of the child reaches your ears and your eyes spot a small young girl with teary eyes and soft blond hair looking at you desperately. "Please, please help me." Your eyebrows furrow at her form slightly dirty and eyes that reflect despair. "It's okay," your voice now reaches the air as you slowly approach her from the door cautiously. "Everything's going to be ok-" You are slammed into the wall from your side so rapidly that you can't even react. For a moment you're confused, and then you feel the pounding of your head and the gut-wrenching scream you stifle in your throat at the pain. The pain that now seeps through your body. Your mind whirls and your vision sways as you desperately try to get a grip on your reality, but your form is betraying you. "Help me." Your eyes go to the girl that had been in front of you but you watch wide-eyed as she disappears from sight. More like, she had never been there in the first place. It was all a trick of your mind, a hallucination put in place by the curse that looms in the corner of the room before you.
A special grade curse.
Your breath comes in rapidly as you watch it smile wickedly at you, and you groan as it slowly approaches you as you wrestle yourself from the floor and try to move. But you are too slow. The curse lets out an intolerable blow and you feel yourself break through walls and you feel your blood start to mingle atop your skin. Your vision blurs from nothing to the blurry scene of the special grade curse slowly approaching you. I'm dead. Your mind buzzes and you feel your eyes slowly start to lose their will to be kept open. I'm so dead. I couldn't even do a single thing... Your mind then flashes to a pair of bright blue eyes, to the smile you adore. Satoru... what would he say? You groan as your breath shakes at the weight of your injuries. You then feel your hands reach for your phone and you are surprised to see it unshattered after the multiple hits you undertook. You press the speed dial and bring it shakily to your ear as you watch your death approach you. It rings once, it rings twice, and then you hear it, his voice, so comforting it almost makes you cry.
"[y/n]?"
There is silence as your heart thrums faster at the impending defeat that looms and you say two words that you never thought you would say so bluntly to your boyfriend, even when every day he swore to keep you safe. "Satoru." Satoru's eyes are wide when he hears your stuttered gasps and the strain in your voice as though you were in pain; you are in pain. His heart pounds erratically and he knows instantly there's something horribly wrong. "[y/n]! What's wrong?! What's happening?!" Your mind slowly starts to turn dull as you can't even keep your eyes focused on the curse that comes before you. "Save me." With that, your phone falls limp to the floor and you don't hear the screaming that takes place from within it, or see how Gojo almost loses his mind. But as your mind whirrs and you see the building power of another cursed technique before you, your thoughts are only of him. So as consciousness fades and you finally let yourself delve into peace, you think it is a final blessing, a rare kindness of the curse when you see a flash of white hair and movements you could recognise from anywhere.
Because it has to be another hallucination.
You feel it then, arms wrapping around you and words shrouded with grief. "Baby, please, wait, I'm sorry." He blabbers and his crystal eyes are broken in his tears. "[Y/N]!"
The Gojo Satoru sobbing over the top of you, what a beautiful sight to die to.
.....
You hear it first before you see it. Pain. But it wasn't yours. There is a steady beep in the background and though your eyes are closed you wonder if life had actually gifted you more of it. You hear the steady rise and fall of your chest and you feel the steady squeeze of your hand.
You hear unsteady words, murmuring with loss.
It had been years since Shoko had seen his crystal eyes so broken as he turned to you, endless streams of tears tearing away his usual composure. His gaze is wide and full of fear so unnatural it makes even her, unbearably uncomfortable. "Gojo I know you're worried but you need to leave you can't be-" She is cut off when he looks sharply at her, form taut with dread and trauma. "Shoko, I-I can't what if she, what if she doesn't-" Shoko sighs as she looks at him and finds her own heart constricting when she looks at your seemingly unconscious form resting from injuries she had worked tirelessly to heal. Shocked was an understatement to how she felt when Gojo brought you in battered, bleeding, bruised; almost dead.
"When she wakes up, come get me."
With that, Shoko leaves with a pack of cigarettes in her hand, already blowing on one before she even reaches the door. Unbeknownst to them, you are trying desperately to move. Amid the quiet of the room, all you hear are the murmured words of your boyfriend; the 'strongest' begging you to come back to him. You finally succeed when you lightly squeeze against his hand and your eyes flutter open to unbearable light. "[y/n]..." Satoru's tired eyes are on you instantly and you meet his gaze with a half-smiling, half-grimacing regard. "Hey, S-Satoru." He moves up from his seat abruptly and wraps you around him tightly. His infinity is off as he desperately tries to feel you alive and well beneath him. "Satoru... l-life-threatening injury..." You wheeze out as his gaze widens before quickly releasing you of his form, still drowning in relief. However, as he breathes in the reality of you, a flash of realisation seems to hit him. "[y/n], I'm sorry, I let you go after a stupid argument, and if I didn't maybe then-" He starts to ramble; Gojo Satoru is lost for words. You stare at him; eyebrows furrowed, gaze adverting.
You look at the trembling of his hands.
"Satoru," you call out to him and see the rare seriousness that encompasses his gaze and the questioning look in his eyes as he turns to you. You know of his past; you lived it with him. So, you know how much this all may have impacted him. "It's okay," you say breathlessly before you feel a slight pounding in your head making you lean back down. "It was just all so stupid," you then reach for his hand once more and Gojo returns your grip quickly, his crystal gaze on you. They were filled with worry and apprehension, but they were filled with love and devotion once more; all for you. "Thank you, for saving me." You whisper and you finally see the slight upturn of his lips as he looks to you upon your bed. But you also see the severity of the worry and dread he held onto. "Don't do that again," was his only reply. You smile at him teasingly as you reach out to wipe away any remaining tears. He then leans forward slightly and cups your face in his hands, pushing away at the hair that lingers upon it. He allows himself to calm down as he gazes at you in front of him, safe and sure. He had almost lost you, he would never allow such a thing to happen to you again. His lips capture yours and you return his fervour to the best of your ability. His hands are gentle as they cradle your form and you feel your own hands carve their way gently through his hair. The both of you are lost in each other for several long moments. Or, until Shoko returns to the horrendous sight of him on top of you.
"How many times have I said, Gojo, not in here!"
Satoru barely misses the edge of her rage, but you laugh at the sight of them, safe and loved. Gojo turns to you then, his own smile quirking upwards at the relief of your joy, of your blatant forgiveness. He swore never to see the look of disappointment in your gaze again. He swore he would die before he saw your form withered in his grasp. When Shoko finally calms down enough to continue her examination, relief brimming in her own gaze as she looks to you, his gaze does not falter. His promise lingers silently in the air.
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apricot-blossomss · 4 months ago
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are you still taking requests? if so, can you do something about Apollo? anything really
☛ mortal!f!reader is captured by the greeks and they experience the wrath of apollo
☛ sfw; tw: violence, threats of sa, disease; takes place in the iliad so i guess this is officially iliad fanfiction in which not chryseis gets kidnapped as a bride prize but you, apollo's mortal lover; i really like writing morally ambigous apollo for some reason
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The rope burned into your wrist as you tried to budge but it was to no avail. Agamemnon's squire, a young man who had been tasked with binding you to the pole, had done a good job at it. Only stubbornness had you still tugging on your bindings. But when you felt blood trickle down your wrists, you halted your movement and opted to look around the tent instead.
It had several rooms, full of treasures he had stolen from your people. A home fit for a king, or as close as possible in these circumstances. The duvet was decked with expensive blankets and golden trinkets covered the floor. With a sigh, you let your head fall against the pole and closed your eyes, letting out a long sigh.
You had lost track of time, but it couldn't have been half a day since you had been captured. Just this morning you had woken up to the chatter and street noises of your home of Lyrnessus. You had pulled back the curtains and relished in the warmth of the sun on your face, quite like a good morning kiss from your lover. Until the Greeks had sacked the city. In an attempt to hide, you had flown down to the cellar and hid in a barrel, but Agamemnons soldiers had found you and abducted you to their camp where they had chained you down in their leaders tent.
Was it evening now? The air was cooler than before, but you couldn't see. Was that the crackling of bondfires? You pulled your legs to your chest and tried to get comfortable. If you were to flee or fight anyone, you would need your rest. But it was hard, when worry and sadness about the fate of your city and people threatened to overwhelm you, fueled by fear and anxiety about your position.
Last night, you had slept in a bed, clean, soft and with your lover by your side. The thought of Apollo gave you a little hope. He wouldn't let anyone touch you, right? That's what he had promised a few nights ago, when the air was humid and your face rested against his warm chest, blankets discarded because it was too hot, skin on skin, nothing between you two.
Your thoughts had carried you away, and of course he had taken notice and lifted your chin to meet your eyes. "Tell me," was all he had said, and you had only shaken your head and leaned your temple on his bicep, looking up into his golden eyes. And the moment you had, you and him had both known what was going on in each others head. It just happened.
"Don't worry," he had said, running a hand through your damp hair. "I wont let anything happen to you." You had nodded, though not wholly convinced, and angled your head upwards to kiss him, but he had hushed your attempts by tapping your lips with his index finger. "I mean it. If any of them lay their hands on you, I will wipe them off the face of this earth."
It had been weird. His voice had been so soothing, yet their meaning was so utterly destructive. "I'm scared," you had confessed. You had tried to deny it for a long time, reminding yourself of his love, but this was a war, and war wasn't kind to anyone- especially not to women. "Lyrnessus will be next, won't it?" It wasn't kind to homes either.
"I don't know," he had admitted. His eyes had taken on a darker shade of gold, his voice a grave tone. "But no matter what, I will always protect you, alright?"
"alright," you had answered, and he had leaned down to return your kiss. In order to calm yourself, you tried to remember the way he tasted, like honey, so sweet and warm. How he held you, tried to imagine his warm arms around you, not the pole digging into your back. and for a moment, you managed to find comfort, just from the thought of him, sitting in a cruel king's tent, hunched over and scared.
Until the covers of the entrance were pulled back and you came face to face with the commander in chief of the greeks, the king of Mycenae. You had expected more. Sure, he was of an imposing figure, but with all the stories you had heard, he was still just a man. You didn't know wether that was good thing when you saw his eyes trail over your body and his tongue wet his lips.
"Get me wine," he told his squire, eyes not leaving you as he stepped further into the room and sat down on the duvet to take off his armor. Now he was truly just a man. You opted to avoid looking at him, instead fixing your eyes onto one of the vases full of valuables. The squire hurried inside again and filled a cup with wine for his king.
"You must be uncomfortable, sitting on the ground," Agamemnon said to you, but it was not in a caring way. There was a mean and guileful tone to his voice.
"I'm not," you answered, trying to steady your voice. You couldn't show fear. You had the distinct notion that he would take great enjoyment in your terror. Never before had you wished so much for a coat, something to cover your cleavage with, because the way he was ogling it made chills run down your spine.
He laughed, and it was a raw, condescending laugh. "Hm, you're comfortable, huh? Wonder for how long, once I have my way with you." You prayed that the effect of his words wasn't visible on your face. A long sigh left his lips as he poured himself another cup of wine. "Look at me, girl."
You didn't and he chucked his cup onto the floor next to you. Both you and the obviously anxious squire of his flinched as the red liquid drenched your dress. Agamemnon laughed about your squirming attempts to get away from the puddle and his eyes devoured the sight of your wet, now see-through skirt. "You won't be playing tough much longer, girl," he mocked you and stood up to stand before you. "What, you got a lover you want to stay pure for? Should I send you back to him once I am thoroughly done with you?"
"He will make you pay," you said and finally met his eye, determinded to keep your gaze steady and firm. The situation was overwhelming and you hated how your lower lip started to tremble. "Everything you do to me, he will inflict on you tenfold."
Another laugh, and he kneeled down to your level. The proximity made you anxious, but you continued to stare him down without showing fear. "I don't see him anywhere," Agamemnon mocked and again, his tongue wet his lips, dry from the sand on from a thirst you could read in his eyes. "Is he a Trojan warrior? He will be dead soon, how will a corpse avenge you? Maybe I'll kill him myself."
"You can never kill him," you breathed. "And he will come for me."
"You think he'll still want you after everything I'm going to do to you?" the man sneered. He was so close you could smell the wine in his breath and you averted your face. "Ya' think that will do the trick?" he grinned and grabbed your chin to violently turn your face towards him.
Just then, the covers of the entrance were pulled back once more and an out of breath greek soldier, one of Agamemnon's Mycenaean warriors, if you were guessing right, stood in the entrance. "What do you think you're doing, soldier?" Agamemnon snarled at him, and the man babbled under his breath, asking for forgiveness.
"What do you want?" Agamemnon said in annoyance, already turning back to you again and still nearly crushing your jaw with his tight grip.
"Sir," he panted and held his side. "The fleet- we are under attack, I think, I don't know, but our men are dropping like flies and we don't know what is going on, several ships of soldiers have already been anihilated! It is a sickness, and it's spreading fast!"
"What?!" Agamemnon roared, jumping to his feet. His face was red with wine and anger. "Go ask Calchas, this must be a god's doing!"
As the soldier stormed out, you laughed breathlessly, laughed about yor captor's anger and confusion. Enraged, he turned to you and you gave him a mocking grin. You were about to open your mouth to ridicule him and his situation when he stormed over and grabbed a fistful of your hair, painfully tugging it so you were forced to look at him. "You little minx, you! You won't be laughing for much longer!"
WHACK!
Both you and Agamemnon jolted away when something hit the ground between your attacker's feet. When you looked down, a new sense of hope and courage flooded through you and your muscles relaxed. Agamemnon, however, shot up and let out a panicked gasp. It was a golden arrow, and you knew who the archer was.
Agamemnon wasn't stupid, and he knew what this meant. He turned around to his terrified squire who was staring at the arrow with widened eyes. "Untie her and get her to Calchas, now! And someone get me another cup of wine!"
As you were dragged out by the young man who folowed his king, you saw that the greek camp was in absolute disarray. Agamemnon pushed through soldiers who were running around in panic, informing each other of the havoc that was presumably being wreaked on the ships at this moment. When they saw him, the soldiers followed their commander in chief and a massive crowd formed when you reached the seer, Calchas.
Agamemnon walked towards him and seemed to explain the situation to him as other men, who seemed to be in command as well, pushed through the crowd to stand by them. You couldn't hear what they were talking about, but they seemed to be trying to persuade the seer to tell them the cause for the sudden destructive outburst. Just when a young man seemed ready to get his answers in a violent way, Calchas raised his hand and pointed at you.
The crowd fell silent and you felt several hundred eyes on you. "It's her," the seer rasped, "She brought death to the camp with her presence." So you had been right with your assumption.
"Why? What is with this girl?" one of the men in charge pressed. There was no malice in his eyes, only worry.
Calchas eyes met yours and he gasped. His hand was shaking. "You have captured the lover of the divine god Apollo himself. She must be returned immediately, or the pest will spread even faster among the troops. The wrath of Apollo knows no limits as long as she is held in this camp." Your heart warmed with pride of being called Apollo's lover- and with satisfaction at Agamemnon's shocked expression.
Anxious whispering broke out and you felt the squire's tight grip on your arm loosen slightly. All the commanders' eyes were on you. One of them spoke up. "Alright, we should act as quickly as possible. Let's release her into no man's land, make sacrafices to Apollo to soothe him and hope for his mercy." The other's mumbled words of approval and nodded, only Agamemnon spoke up.
"No."
"What do you mean, no?" a young man said sharply. "How is this not a clear decision?"
"The girl is my bride prize, she is mine by right!" Agamemnon shot back.
The squire next to you gasped, so loud that everyone turned to him. At first, you thought he was just being jumpy again, but then you saw the golden arrow that had pierced clean through his chest. And the growing patch of red on his tunic. You could only watch in shock as his grip on your upper arm slipped away and his knees buckled under him. Before his body hit the ground, he was dead.
☀️
A short time later, one of the officers escorted you out of the camp. You had gotten the cloak and water you had asked for without any hesitation, but had refused the valuables offered to you in an attempt to soothe your lover's destructive rage. Relief filled your heart, and you didnt know how you could have ever doubted that Apollo would save you.
After you had left the last of the tents behind, you walked another few hundred steps until you were out of sight of both the camp and Troy, in the midst of no man's land. "You are one lucky girl," your escort said as a goodbye and you nodded. "Yes, i am."
He walked away, back to the camp, and you were left, waiting for Apollo. You didnt have to wait for long. He descended upon the earth in a rain of golden light. To avoid being blinded, you averted your eyes until the light dimmed. As soon as his feet met the ground, you let go of the cloak, ran towards him and threw yourself into his welcoming arms. They locked around you in an instant, fingers digging into your flesh and his face buried in your neck.
You felt him breathe in and out in a shudder and retreated, thinking he was about to cry, but when you looked into his eyes, they were filled to the brim with a chilling and utterly destructive rage. Your soft hands cupped his face and he let out another shuddering breath, as if he was trying hard to compose himself. Instinctively, you knew he was trying not to scare you, that had to be why he was averting his deadly eyes and pulled you close once more.
"I would have killed all of them, burned down every. single. ship. If it were in my power, I would have striken down Agamemnon and dragged him down to Tartarus myself, so he couldn't even escape his torture in death." His hands loosened their almost bruising hold on you and his voice softened. "Forgive me, my love. I didn't mean to scare you."
"Oh, I wouldn't mind," you smiled shyly. Retreating a few inches, you looked up at him and placed your hand on his marble cheek. He leaned into your touch and kissed your temple and you smiled. "The last part, I mean."
"I'm sorry I can't do that right now," he said, lifting you up into his arms and holding you as if you were as fragile as glass. "but I may have something even better. Let's go home."
Your heart dropped at the mention. Blinking away the tears in your eyes, you looked up at the stars. "I don't have a home anymore," you said, whispering it for some reason. Maybe because you didn't want to know it yourself. "My city is destroyed, my house is burned down, I have nowhere to go."
"You have," he said and golden rays engulfed you, the same ones that had announced his arrival from Olympus. As you realized what he was planning to do, you looked at him in disbelief, and he smiled at you. "I meant my home. Our home. If you want to." The rays of gold around you axcellerated their speed and the only thing you could see was the face you loved most, drowned in a golden hue. He was going to take you to Olympus. Your new home.
"Yes," you breathed and smiled at him. You would be willing to go everywhere with him right now. Your hand found his and he held you tight to his body as his feet lifted off the ground. "Let's go home."
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unintentionalseductress · 4 months ago
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Someone You Loved
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I'm a mess since I finished Xavier's myth and my period came early so now I'm just sad and can't focus on anything else. Headcanons for the men when MC breaks up with them. Warnings: None, but lots of angst because everything SUCKS. Love and Deepspace. Hmph. More like Love and Deep Depression.
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In the darkness, Zayne wakes suddenly, his hands instinctively reaching out to pull you to him; only for his grasp to curl into cold sheets and emptiness.
How long had it been? Since he’d slept peacefully? The nightmares never seemed to plague him when you were asleep beside him in his bed, your breath softly ghosting the crook of his neck. He glances up at the ceiling trying to calm his breath. The little dreamcatcher you’d hung so long ago sways slightly and his heart clenches. The bed felt too big for just him. Before meeting you he slept in the middle; now he can’t bring himself to take back your half, leaving it empty, remembering the way your curled form occupied it.
The only time he saw you was when you came in for your checkup. And you seemed fine, which was good, but a part of him is haunted by the possibility that maybe something about him had made you leave him. You had insisted it wasn’t but he can’t help but run scenarios over and over in mind, swirling like a mess of ink in water.
Perhaps his reticent nature had finally driven you away. Or his sarcasm. Or maybe the scars on his hands. Women didn’t like scarred men, did they? He’d wondered about that for too long before Greyson, catching him staring at his hands, said, “Your hands are healing Dr. Zayne. Why do you look at them so doubtfully?”
After those words had been spoken, Zayne had thrown himself into his work. He’d always been a workaholic of course, but it had amplified to a point where he couldn’t go home. It was on purpose. He slept in his office until his superior had caught him, insisting he can’t sleep here.
No one was checking in on him. No one to remind him to take a break or to coax him into taking a nap in between patients. No one waking him up with a smile and a slice of cake that they’d picked up on their way to his place.
The nightmares started after he tried sleeping at home. He hates himself for feeling like a little boy, unable to sleep without a security blanket. But he needed you. The way all living things needed air and sunlight to thrive, he needed you in such a poignant way that it almost stops his blood knowing you’re not in his life anymore.
He knows he needs to sleep. Silently, because that’s what he’d grown accustomed to, silently rolling out to bed so as to not disturb you, he pads over to his closet and pulls out a t-shirt, far too small to be one of his own.
The t-shirt had somehow survived the purge, the day you’d taken all your stuff out of his apartment. It was strange to look at his apartment now because all he sees are the empty spaces you left behind. The spots on the windowsill where your little planters used to be. The blank space on the nightstand on your side of the bed where your phone, earbuds, and hand lotion used to once sit. The cup in the bathroom now holds only one toothbrush.
He brings the t-shirt to his nose and instantly your scent fills his being. He’s thankful he didn’t return it to you as he’d initially planned. The piece of fabric that retained the wonderful smell of your shampoo and the fresh scent of your skin. It calmed him. Cradling it against his cheek, he makes his way back to the bed, laying the t-shirt on his pillow and burying his nose into it as he tries to find a comfortable position.
The t-shirt works its magic, eventually lulling him into a dreamless sleep. The only peace he’s ever known was when he was with you.
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It was hard to avoid Xavier no matter where you went. His being your upstairs neighbor and your mission partner made it impossible not to see him. His chest ached whenever he saw you but he masked it with a smile. He never stopped looking out for you. Because he had promised, hadn’t he? So many centuries ago, in a different lifetime, that he’d always be there for you no matter what?
The day of the breakup is always a blur to him. He can’t recall any of the details, but he remembers your face with clarity, remembers the pained expression in your eyes. He had soothingly embraced you, encouraging you to talk to him about what was bothering you, because even his deepest worries never fathomed the idea of you leaving him.
Xavier had frozen when you had tearfully whispered that you wanted to break up. Surely he had misheard you? But no, he hadn’t. You had tried, in vain, to get him to explain where he disappeared to. It bothered you when Xavier disappeared and it didn’t matter if he came back each time. You told him you wanted the truth, and nothing less than that would convince you to stay. Xavier had faltered; he knew he owed it to you, but he didn’t know where to begin.
Philos was a distant dream, probably lost to time and deepspace but he couldn’t help it. The possibility of returning to his own timeline weighed down on him, a heavy burden of duty. If it had been just him, he would have gladly given up months ago, content to stay here with you. But the crew that had accompanied him, dedicated to his cause, stuck here because of his decisions deserved the chance, and he couldn’t give up on them.
Knowing he would never be able to explain without hurting you, he had given you a sad smile, his blue eyes growing misty as he tried to put conviction into his words. “I hope you find someone more worthy.” The feeling of your hands leaving his felt like a rift had divided his heart into two, a chasm separating you both. You left his apartment, and he spent the night on his balcony, listening to your sobs carrying through the air, not knowing how he could take away your pain. 
With much trial and error, Xavier now had a cordial relationship with you. He accompanied you whenever you asked. He still hung out with you at the arcade and came out for hot pot whenever you asked. Because hadn’t he promised to love you even when you weren’t his?
Xavier watches you talking to Tara and when you finally catch his eye, you give him a smile and wave, which he returns. Although he wishes you weren’t broken up, it always brings him relief to see you smiling. He had felt the satisfaction of watching you become a happier person, seeing you grow and eventually finding joy around you. And that would have to be enough. 
He would settle for having you in his life any way he could, even if you decided you didn’t love him. Because after losing you twice, he’d take anything to cut his losses. 
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Thomas follows Rafayel around his studio. He can see the state Rafayel is in, the dark bags under his eyes, and the unkempt hair and clothes.
“Rafayel, I think some rest-”
“I don’t need it.” Rafayel picks up a paintbrush, which is already messy from the various hues it was dipped into previously and begins to put strokes onto his canvas. Across the room are scattered paintings and unfinished sculptures, all half-done and looking rather gloomy. 
Thomas tries again. “I can book you a weekend at your favorite onsen. Perhaps a massage. It’ll help clear your head.”
Rafayel glares at him, anger in his lavender eyes. “I said I don’t need it. I have work to do. You know where the door is.”
Signing, Thomas takes his dismissal and the studio is plunged into silence. Rafayel tries again to finish his painting then grits his teeth and hurls the paintbrush away. Droplets of paint drip across the marble floor as it clatters some feet away.
It had been a while since you had broken up with him and Rafayel feels like he’s stuck in time. All his works are incomplete, becoming a neverending list of things that he might never actually pay attention to again.  
Of late, he’s obsessed with trying to paint you, but each time he recalls your face, something or the other feels off. The shape of your eyes, too slanted to be accurate, the curve of your nose, too round to be correct, haunt him as he gazes at the canvas before him. It was you, yet it wasn’t you. 
There’s panic growing in his chest at the idea that he might be forgetting what you look like. His hands and memory seem to be at odds with each other, unable to communicate and translate what he was remembering onto paper. 
He traces the edge of your face, the paint smearing his fingertips, frustration welling up in his heart. He feels disappointed in himself. Hadn’t he said to himself that even if you forgot, he’d remember for the both of you? Yet now, he can’t recall the features of your face, like the image of you in his head was behind a pixelated curtain, and all he could recollect were rough features that somewhat resembled you.
He might put himself into a manic state. He hasn’t slept, haunted by the possibility that he may never paint your portrait accurately again. Rafayel pulls out his phone, the light illuminating his tired face and he desperately looks through his photos. A few days after the breakup, in a fit of rage, he’d deleted all your photos off his phone, an action he now regretted.
“Please…please…there’s gotta be at least one…” he prays as he swipes through the pictures. As he’s about to give up, he finally comes across a single photo, a group picture, taken from his art exhibition some time ago. And there you are, all your features coming back to him with painful clarity. With a sigh, he picks up a fresh paintbrush and tries again, feeling relief flood him as your familiar face finally begins to bloom onto the canvas. 
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Luke and Kieran looked in concern at the closed door of Sylus’s room. Sylus wasn't the type to conduct business remotely. Even with all the henchmen at his disposal, he still preferred going out into the N109 zone to ensure his armories and money accounts were secure. But after the breakup, he had been delegating more and mingling with his associates less. 
The missing bottles of whiskey hadn’t gone unnoticed by their keen eyes, and the twins carefully crack open his bedroom door a fraction. He’s slumped over the large desk made of fine oak wood, a liquor bottle cracked open, and a glass in his hand. 
His ruby eyes are hazy and it’s clear he’s intoxicated. The little grumpy crow plushie was sitting on his desk, and his unfocused eyes were gazing in reminiscence at it while Mephisto glared at the soft toy in objection. 
“Boss?” Luke dares to approach him, and Sylus looks up sharply. 
“What?” The irritation in his voice is evident. 
“Um…Your meeting with the protocore dealer. He just left a message saying he hasn’t been able to get in touch with you and…” His voice falters as Sylus’s eyes glow like embers in a fireplace.
“He can wait.” The words are snarled as he downs the whiskey in a single gulp before pouring more. “Get out.”
Luke and Kieran retreat but they glance at each other despairingly. This was the N109 zone after all. Dealings with mafia leaders didn’t just get put on hold without consequences.
“Damn it all,” Sylus murmurs. He swirls the whiskey in his glass, and all he sees are your eyes, fixated on him in horror. He was used to the erratic atmospheric changes in the N109 zone but the night you left, it felt like he was being choked by the air, not a drop of oxygen left for him to breathe in. He knew he’d overdone it when threatening the merchant, knew he should have controlled himself from using his evol as cruelly as he had. But he needed the upper hand and the only way knew how to assert himself was through violence.  
He’d never hurt you. His precious little dove, his whole heart. But what you’d witnessed had left you terrified of him and his ominous abilities. Sylus had begged; his pride wasn’t so great as to risk losing you. He’d fallen to his knees, his arms locked around your waist, his cheek resting on your chest, listening to the way your heart was beating in your ribcage. It was hard to say how long the two of you had remained that way until you had gently disengaged from his grip, bid him goodbye, and left. He wasn’t deterred at first, calling and texting you desperately, sending gifts and bouquets to your door until you had called him and told him to stop. 
He drinks, feeling the heat and the sting of the whiskey as it goes down his throat, the only thing that helped with the pain. You were the sunlight in this dark world and without you, Sylus feels nothing except coldness. You were gone, the only blessing he’d ever received.
© unintentionalseductress original work | no copying, plagiarizing or translating
@theimmortalbuns @otomegamesforlife @sweets-kozume @supernaturalbaesduh @ladyparamount
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cherienymphe · 1 year ago
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Teenage Dirtbag X
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JJ Maybank x Reader x Rafe Cameron
Warnings: mentions of NON-CON, DUB-CON acts, abusive relationship, domestic violence, violence (+ gun violence), gun kink, dacryphilia, attempted murder, mentions of blood, public sex, jealousy, manipulation, infidelity, underage drinking, drug use, canon ages, kook!reader
➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies | ➥ divider by @firefly-graphics
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➥ series masterlist
summary: You’re charmingly spoiled. You’re too kind for your own good. You’re the princess of Figure 8 …and you’re way out of JJ Maybank’s league, but when he realizes that Rafe Cameron’s pride and joy is actually a bruised and battered damsel, he’s determined to save you.
Your rescue just comes with a price.
You blinked at JJ’s question, leaning back against the wall of the pool house.
He sat next to you, both of you facing the couch, and you tried to ignore the feel of his arm brushing against yours. Despite the fact that it was only a week ago that he was kissing you in your bedroom—and that Rafe didn’t not deserve it—you still felt wrong about the whole thing. Horrible or not, the older blond was still your boyfriend, and it was bad enough that you were hiding out in the pool house with JJ while Rafe was probably off snorting coke with his friends.
You didn’t want to make it worse by doing anything other than talking.
The blonde’s question made you eventually sigh, straightening.
“Hey…hey, you don’t have to answer anything you don’t-.”
“No…I…” you shook your head. “It’s fine.”
That was the truth.
“It’s just that I’ve never talked about any of this with anyone before…”
Your voice shrank, and you didn’t want to admit how comforting it felt to feel JJ’s hands come up to rest on your arms. It was strange to say all of this out loud to anyone, especially JJ, because you were so used to Rafe’s behavior—had been rationalizing it for so long—and you felt nervous as to how JJ would take it.
“It was my 19th birthday,” you slowly said.
You felt JJ tense, and when you snuck a glance at him, there was a deep frown on his face as he looked at you.
“We were arguing…” you sadly smiled as you thought about what it’d been about. “…because I wouldn’t have sex with him.”
You scoffed at the memory and at how you’d ignored what you thought was a little thing.
“It’d been a sore spot for a while. I was a virgin, I wasn’t ready, and Rafe was waiting longer than he’d anticipated.”
JJ’s hands fell, and he fully turned to face you, that frown remaining on his face as he listened.
“It became this whole…thing that really just pissed me off because it was my birthday,” you spat out, frowning now too. “It was my birthday party, and he was ruining it.”
You swallowed, recalling how angry and sad you’d felt that night.
“You know, I was reading up on this one day, and it said that sometimes people like him will purposely start arguments and fights on special days and holidays and stuff to make it all about them?” you chuckled to yourself, shaking your head. “They were right.”
Tears kissed your eyes, and JJ reached out to brush his thumbs underneath them.
“…because every time I think about that day, instead of remembering turning nineteen and celebrating with my family and my friends and my boyfriend… All I remember is him slapping me,” you whispered, holding JJ’s gaze. “All I remember is where it all started and how he begged me to forgive him…and how I should’ve left then.”
“Hey…”
“It was my birthday…but to me it’s just the beginning of the end. It’s the start of when Rafe ruined my life.”
JJ wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer, and you pressed your face into his shoulder. You felt so odd—so much lighter—and you didn’t need to be a therapist to know that it was because you were finally talking about this. The blonde’s hands rubbing up and down your back was enough to make your lashes flutter.
“You know, I blamed myself for the longest time,” you mumbled.
JJ pulled away almost immediately, lips parting, and you shook your head.
“I know that it’s not my fault. I know that, now, but… I was so angry that night that I said things that I knew would make him mad,” you shrugged. “It just didn’t seem fair that I was the only one upset on my birthday.”
“That doesn’t excuse him hitting you,” JJ bit out, and you nodded with a shrug.
“It doesn’t…but…for a while I kind of believed I’d brought that on myself.”
JJ looked like he didn’t know how to take in what you’d told him, pink lips pressed together as he just studied your face. The bruising under your eye was practically nonexistent, and you shuddered when he reached up to lightly graze the skin with his fingers. You’d been exceptionally agreeable since the incident, dreading a repeat of the night where Rafe forced himself on you so violently that you’d had to strip the sheets.
JJ suddenly blinked, brows twitching, and there was an unsure look on his face.
“Can I ask you something?” he wondered, voice low, and you nodded.
A look passed over his face that you couldn’t place, and he seemed to be thinking hard about whatever was on his mind.
“A little over a year ago…”
You felt your shoulders droop, almost positive you knew where he was going with this.
“Sarah told us how you and Rafe had called the police one day.”
You sighed, recalling the story Ward had repeated. Neighbors were bound to notice a police car in the yard, bound to spread gossip, and he couldn’t very well tell people the truth.
“She didn’t know what for. Said that Ward wouldn’t tell her…”
JJ’s words died in the air as you stood, his hands falling from you. You tried not to think about that day if you could help it, and you were surprised by the quick procession of tears. JJ stood with you while you wiped your face, and you knew what he was going to ask before he even opened his mouth.
“Did you call the cops? On him?”
By his tone, you could tell that he knew the answer, and when you sniffed, JJ was there. He turned you around and pulled you against him. The reminder of that day—and all the emotions that weighed you down that evening—had more tears escaping against your will. You twisted your fingers into the back of his shirt, trembling in his hold, and JJ held you tighter.
“I thought I was going to die,” you shakily confessed. “I thought he was going to kill me.”
You could feel a shiver crawl down his spine at that.
“He was so mad,” you cried. “He was screaming and throwing glass at me and…he put a gun in my mouth.”
Your face was pressed into the crook of JJ’s neck.
“I didn’t know what else to do. I really thought…” you trailed off, squeezing your eyes shut. “It’s why I didn’t even want to talk to you. I didn’t want to go through that again for something as stupid as a smile.”
JJ seemed to freeze at that, and when he pulled away a bit, his gaze was questioning.
“What…?”
You opened and closed your mouth while JJ just stared at you, blue eyes glinting as his mind started to put the pieces together.
“What do you mean? Are you saying…?”
“No! JJ, that wasn’t your fault, it was mine.”
“Stop saying that,” he breathed. “What the hell do you mean? Are you saying Rafe did that because…?”
You rubbed your forehead, sighing.
“JJ, it wasn’t your fault. I’m the one who smiled back at you that day at The Wreck. Rafe saw.”
You swore you saw the color drain from his face, and you watched JJ stumble back, falling to sit on the edge of the couch. He was staring up at you with parted lips, and you didn’t need to be a mind reader to know that he was going over that interaction in his mind. It was such a simple and harmless interaction…one that had an almost fatal consequence.
JJ ran his hands down his face.
“…and when I told Rafe that you’d apologized to me?”
His voice was low—troubled—and when he lifted his gaze to meet yours, you only pulled your lip between your teeth. When you didn’t respond right away, you watched him exhale, shoulders sagging as he buried his face into his hands.
“JJ, that wasn’t your fault.”
I’m an idiot,” he choked out.
“JJ…” you whispered. “You couldn’t have known.”
“That doesn’t matter!”
He was standing, now, and you hated the conflict and regret you saw in his eyes.
“I knew he treated you like shit,” he spat, gesturing towards the door. “I knew it would piss him off.”
“JJ,” you reached for him.
“I just thought you guys would argue a little,” he whispered, and you rested your hand on his arm. “I didn’t know that he was…”
You held his gaze—yours pleading—as you tried to get him to see that it wasn’t his fault. You needed JJ to understand that there was no way he could’ve known. Sarah lived under the same roof as Rafe—and you half the time—and she still didn’t know. You weren’t going to fault JJ for thinking Rafe was only capable of being a little bit of an asshole.
When JJ’s hand rested on your cheek, your heart skipped a beat.
He was getting closer, and you should’ve been stopping him. The truth was that you felt safe with JJ, and you didn’t want to. The beginning of your relationship with Rafe felt like ages ago, so this safe—and excited feeling—you were experiencing with JJ felt almost new. When his nose touched yours, you placed your hand on his chest.
“I never would’ve done that if I had known…”
“I know you wouldn’t,” you reassured him, swallowing when his other hand touched your waist, fingers grazing the skin from where your shirt rode up. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay,” JJ argued. “You were right that day. I was being an asshole.”
When his lips brushed yours, you shook your head.
“JJ-.”
The rest of your words were swallowed when his lips covered yours, following you every time you tried to step back. It had been a week since he kissed you last, and the way he moved his mouth over yours told you that he would do it every day if he could. His hands were all over you, and you gasped into his mouth when they rested on the small of your back, pinning your lower half against him.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled against your lips. “I’m really fucking sorry.”
When your back met the wall, JJ wasted no time in pressing his knee between your legs, and you couldn’t hold in the shudder as he pressed his leg against your clothed mound. Things felt like they were moving too fast, so much so that you didn’t even realize what was happening until you moaned, JJ forcing you to grind yourself against his leg.
His hands were tight on your waist, and his lips had just traveled to your neck when your phone rang.
It startled you and angered JJ, the blond letting out a frustrated huff. It was Rafe—you knew it was Rafe—the other blond calling you almost every hour from the moment he’d left. JJ’s hands briefly squeezed your waist before forcing himself to pull away. His blue eyes glinted, and when you studied his face, he only shook his head.
Reluctantly, he let you go.
“Hey,” you softly said the moment you answered the phone.
You avoided JJ’s gaze as Rafe’s voice filled your ear.
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“You know what? I actually think I’m gonna just head home.”
JJ’s voice reached you from the kitchen, and you only briefly glanced up as Pope responded.
“Seriously man? Now, you don’t even want to go out anymore? You made such a fuss!”
“Yeah, I know,” the blond said, and you heard Sarah say something—probably to John B. “…but I’m not feeling too good, and I think I’m just going to go home.”
Pope sounded disappointed—as did John B. —but they didn’t argue with him much over it. You were currently in the Cameron’s kitchen getting something to eat, and you had been since Sarah, her boyfriend, Pope, and JJ came inside under the reasoning that Pope had to pee.
“We’re just going to hang out with some people at the beach,” she’d said.
You could see it in her eyes then that she’d wanted to ask you to join them, but even if you hadn’t given her a look warning her off of that, Rafe’s tight grip on you was clear. If Sarah thought he was strict before, then it was nothing in comparison to how he was now after the incident at The Chateau. His phone call only moments ago was proof of it.
“How are you going to get back?” Sarah wondered, her voice pulling you from your thoughts.
“You know I’ll find a way,” JJ told her, tone light and boastful.
She made an unsure sound before letting it go.
“Well, leave before Rafe gets back. I don’t want a phone call from Rose or Y/N telling me that my brother and my friend got into a fight.”
You closed the fridge as the rest of them filed out, telling JJ to call them when he made it back to The Cut. The house was oddly quiet, and while you wanted to pretend like you weren’t alone in the house with JJ—Rose didn’t count—it was kind of hard to do when you turned around to find him at the kitchen entrance.
He was wearing some shirt with the sleeves cut off—as he often did—and you tried not to let your gaze linger on his arms.
“I hope you didn’t do that for me…”
The smirk that danced along his lips gave you your answer.
“Maybe,” he shrugged, stepping into the kitchen. “I was kind of hoping Rafe wouldn’t be here.”
“…and he could walk in at any moment…as is his right. Considering,” you gestured around. “…this is his house.”
JJ leaned his arms on the other side of the counter, gazing up at you as you grabbed a paper towel.
“Hey, I’m sure I could find some excuse if he catches me in here…”
He straightened, slowly making his way around the island, and you didn’t miss that mischievous glint in his blue eyes.
“If he manages to find me on top of you…maybe I could even tell him I forced you into it.”
“JJ…” you said, taking a step back.
He held your gaze for a few moments before looking away with a shake of his head.
“Why do you feel bad about what you’re doing? He treats you like shit,” he chuckled, but it lacked humor.
You looked away from him, shrugging.
“I’m not doing anything,” you whispered.
He didn’t respond right away, and you didn’t hear him move closer, so you shuddered when you felt his fingers grazing the side of your face.
“You shouldn’t feel bad about kissing me,” he quietly told you. “If you ask me, you should be doing a lot worse.”
When you looked at him again, he was much closer than you’d anticipated, and you sharply inhaled. Despite his cheeky nature, you could see the way his eyes dimmed as he looked at you.
“Every time I think about him…and you…I think I could kill him.”
You frowned at his confession, shaking your head.
“JJ…”
“I would if you asked me to,” he continued, moving closer. “I’d drown him in the fucking ocean.”
“You can’t-! You can’t say things like that,” you said, voice lowering.
“Why not?” he curiously wondered. “You’re telling me you don’t want him dead for everything he’s put you through? There was blood on your sheets last week-.”
“I know,” you cut him off. “I was there, remember?”
You watched JJ take a deep breath, and he seemed to be calming himself down. The silence was a little tense, and you worriedly eyed the entrance, expecting Rafe to just show up at any moment. When JJ took your hand, you tried to pull it away, but he wouldn’t let you. You found yourself between him and the counter, and your heart was in your throat.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I just…don’t understand why you’re fighting me.”
Your eyes burned, and you briefly looked towards the ceiling.
“…because,” you breathed. “He’s still my boyfriend.”
“The only reason you’re with him is because you don’t want him to fucking murder you,” JJ sneered. “That’s not a relationship, that’s a hostage situation.”
You couldn’t disagree with JJ’s assessment, and you both knew it.
“He enjoys treating you like shit…so why can’t you bring yourself to enjoy treating him like shit?”
Again, JJ’s logic wasn’t wrong, and you briefly closed your eyes with a sigh.
“…because if he caught me, he’d kill me,” you whispered.
When JJ’s hand touched your face again, you held his gaze. The smile he gave you was small, and your heart fluttered when he brushed his thumb over your skin.
“What did I say earlier?” he mockingly replied. “Let him try to kill me for fucking his girlfriend, I don’t care.”
He pressed his lips to yours.
“I just want you to stop feeling guilty over that asshole because he doesn’t deserve it.”
You chewed on your lip as he ran his eyes over your face, and when he was about to kiss you again, you shook your head.
“You should go. Sarah was right, Rafe could be back at any moment, and… That’s not a fight I think I’ll ever be ready for,” you sighed, moving from between him and the counter.
JJ seemed reluctant, but he eventually obliged, grazing his hand along your waist on the way out.
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Rafe’s light snores grew quieter the moment you closed the door behind you.
He’d come to your house drunk and stumbling, too wasted to even fuck you—although it wasn’t for lack of trying. Naturally, he wouldn’t hear a word you said about drunk driving, waving you off and laughing in your face. After his second failed attempt to stay awake, he merely rolled off of you, his even breathing reaching your ears only moments later.
You’d pulled your knees up to your chest, eyeing him for the longest time and mulling over your conversation with JJ. You knew that the other blond wasn’t wrong. Rafe had done—and would do—much worse to you. Your relationship wasn’t a relationship, at all, but instead a prison, and maybe you shouldn’t feel guilty for finding some semblance of happiness. No matter where it came from.
Once alcohol knocked Rafe out, he was pretty much dead to the world for hours.
…and that was how you found yourself putting on shoes while he slept. You might’ve been more nervous and scared if you weren’t so in tune with Rafe’s patterns. There was no doubt in your mind that he wouldn’t wake up until at least noon the following day, but you still kept your steps light as you made your way down the stairs. You couldn’t stop your heart from racing, and your fingers shook while you disabled the alarm.
The walk across the lawn felt too long, and if you hadn’t already psyched yourself up, you might’ve turned around and went back inside the house. Out of paranoia, you looked over your shoulder, relieved to see that your room was still dark with no sign of movement in the window. JJ didn’t open the door right away when you knocked.
However, once fatigue faded a bit, and he realized that it was indeed you through the cracked door, he was swinging it open and pulling you inside.
“I just…wanted to sleep here for a few hours I guess,” you murmured, still feeling unsure.
JJ shifted on his feet, and you only then noticed his bare chest. The plaid pants he wore hung low on his hips, and you told yourself you weren’t here for anything like that.
“…and Rafe…?”
“So drunk that not even an earthquake could wake him,” you said with a shrug.
JJ pulled his lip between his teeth, eyeing you with a look that was hard to name. He didn’t respond right away, just staring at you and studying you. His light hair was going every which way, some hanging into his face, and one hand ran through it when the other eventually reached for you.
“I’m glad you came,” he whispered, pulling you to him.
The pool house wasn’t as big as others you’d seen—namely some of your former friends—but it was spacious enough for both a living room and a decent sized bedroom. JJ’s hand was tight on yours as he pulled you through the threshold, and you glanced around, recalling that you hadn’t been inside the bedroom since high school. The bedding was askew, obviously lived in, and you were glad your parents barely paid the building any mind outside of the yearly spring cleaning.
“Do you like staying here?” you asked him, sitting on the edge of the bed.
JJ found that funny.
“If you’d ever seen my place, you’d know how crazy that question is,” he told you, plopping down beside you. “I love staying here.”
His face was close to yours.
“…and not just because of the 100 thread count sheets or whatever.”
He shrugged at you, eyebrows waggling, and you fought back a smile.
“I guess I’ll have to see your place to give me some perspective then.”
His own smile twitched, and you didn’t like the way his face fell a bit.
“Nah,” he breathed. “That’s…not something I want you to see.”
You felt your own face fall.
“…I mean, I know things with your father are pretty…ugly, but it’s where you grew up, isn’t it?”
Your tone was a little hopeful, and you watched JJ watch you. His blue eyes shined in the darkness, and you didn’t miss the way his smile grew again. When he reached for your face, he let out a light laugh.
“Yeah…yeah it is where I grew up,” he confirmed. “I guess you’re right about that.”
He pulled you with him as he laid down, and you faced him on your side.
“We’ll have to find some way to get you back to The Cut then,” he whispered.
At the reminder of your last visit, you both grew quiet. You were sure you both were remembering that morning when Rafe came to pick you up, and you recalled your next reunion with JJ, feeling comforted that he was so worried about you the entire time. As if thinking of the exact same thing, he touched the skin under your eye, and before you could say anything, JJ leaned in to touch it with his lips.
“I really hate that you’re with him,” he said after a while, pulling away. “He doesn’t deserve you.”
You took a deep breath at that, reaching out and touching his arm, thoughtful.
“…and you do…?”
When you lifted your gaze, your eyes met his again.
“I like to think that I do,” he murmured, fingers dancing towards your chin.
JJ pulled you into a kiss, and despite the fact that this wasn’t what you snuck out of the house for, you couldn’t ignore the way your stomach flipped. In this moment, JJ felt like your boyfriend—lying in bed with you and talking to you and kissing you. It was the most relaxed you’d felt in bed for a long time, and you knew it was a feeling you could get used to…and have trouble going without.
“What are we doing?” you found yourself whispering in the darkness.
You looked between his eyes as you asked this.
“Rafe’s…asleep in my bedroom…and I…” you scoffed. “I’m here with you.”
“It’s sexy, isn’t it…”
“JJ,” you sighed. “I’m serious. Like…what are we doing?”
You were sure that your worry was all over your face.
“We don’t have to have an answer for that, right now,” was his response, hand touching your waist. “I just want to help you forget about Rafe, sometimes.”
He kissed you again.
“I want you to be with someone you don’t have to be afraid of,” he murmured against your lips. “Someone you can relax with.”
He pulled you closer, rolling you both, and when he rested on top of you, you pressed your hands to his arms.
“JJ, I don’t… I’m not comfortable with anything like that yet.”
Your lips brushed his as you spoke, and you swallowed.
“Kissing you and sneaking around to talk to you is one thing, but…”
You didn’t know why, but going beyond that in any way would make what you were doing seem too real—too deceptive. JJ didn’t seem to care about that though, pressing his lips to yours again.
“Do you trust me?” he wondered into the kiss.
“Yes, but-.”
“…but what?” his nose touched yours as he pulled back, holding your gaze. “You’re just scared because Rafe’s intimidated you and beaten you down so much that you’re afraid to do anything for yourself.”
Was that the root of it? It was true, of course, but you also still felt uncomfortable.
“I don’t know…”
“Hasn’t Rafe also been the only guy you’ve ever been with?”
You gave a reluctant nod, and JJ smiled at you.
“…and you don’t think that has something to do with it? You being scared of what you don’t know…?”
That was also true, and JJ took your silence as consent, kissing you again as his hand trailed down your frame. You made a slight noise of protest when his hand slipped between your thighs, Rafe’s t-shirt riding up. The blond on top of you swallowed it down, refusing to break the kiss, and you jerked when his fingers brushed over your underwear.
“JJ,” you said when you turned your head away, pushing at his arm.
“It’s okay,” he breathed against your cheek. “Trust me.”
When you looked at him again, his fingers were already tracing circles over where your opening was through the fabric. His blond hair touched your forehead.
“I would never hurt you,” he assured you, more pressure from his fingers, now.
You involuntarily lifted your hips, and you didn’t know if it was to push him away or get closer. You wanted to push him away, not quite okay with taking things this far just yet. In truth, you didn’t know if you’d ever be, and you thought about what JJ said. Maybe you were just scared, but did you fix that by pushing yourself to do something you weren’t ready for?
You supposed it didn’t matter, anyway.
JJ’s fingers were circling your clit, panties resting on his hand as he touched you. His lips trailed kisses along your neck, and without thinking, you threw your head back. You forgot all about Rafe who was knocked out drunk in your bed, none the wiser to JJ’s fingers sliding between your lower lips. You could feel genuine excitement, something you hadn’t felt in a long time, and you sighed when he dragged his fingers between your folds.
You could tell that JJ was being mindful of whatever lasting damage there still might be from last week.
“You’re so soft,” he murmured, lips at the corner of your mouth. “…and wet.”
You shuddered at those words and the feel of the tips of his fingers just barely dipping into you before he pulled them out.
“Do you get this wet for Rafe?”
The mention of your boyfriend had your heart skipping a beat, but the feel of JJ’s fingers massaging your soaking cunt had you answering honestly.
“No,” you breathed, and you felt him smirk against your skin.
“I want to fuck you so bad,” he confessed.
“JJ,” you warned, hand on his wrist.
“I know,” he sighed. “I know, but a guy can dream.”
You pulled your lip between your teeth.
“I think about it a lot…pushing my cock into you and watching you stretch around me…”
When you softly moaned at that, JJ hummed.
“Do you think about it too? About milking me dry?”
You clenched around nothing, aching as he circled his fingers.
“…because I do…especially in his bed,” you dug your nails into his skin. “Fucking you until you come on his sheets, letting me fill you up right where he sleeps.”
You gently shuddered, your orgasm washing over you as you wrapped your other arm around him. JJ rode the wave with you, fingers rubbing against you, playing with you as you soaked them.
“Atta girl,” he whispered against your lips, and you felt slightly disbelieving at what had just occurred.
The proof was smeared on the inside of your thighs, but even when you watched JJ place his fingers into his mouth, it still didn’t feel real. JJ wouldn’t let you go as you caught your breath, kissing you again when you finally did.
“See,” he quietly told you. “That wasn’t so bad.”
He may have been right in some aspects, but JJ’s way around words and that tempting influence of his had you worried about what else you’d convince yourself you wanted.
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xsignedmsriss · 6 months ago
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Okay since it’s BG3’s anniversary, I felt compelled to finally talk about the Halsin romance scene after realizing something weeks ago.
Can we please talk about the difference in expression Halsin has in these screenshots! He doesn’t make all of these looks in the same scenes, these are different loads. I only noticed the difference after the millionth time going through a Halsin romance and I haven’t yet seen anyone else talking about this???
The shots on the left are from a different load (I think a different playthrough entirely if I recall) anyway—
On the left side, we have a Halsin who is very confident, intense gaze, taking a moment to admire the beauty before him and is certain he is about to show you the greatest night you’ve ever had. Both when he’s standing and on his knees, that confidence doesn’t wane. He wants this and isn’t afraid to show it. These are the looks I get most often.
Then we have Halsin on the right. My goodness. Here is a man who likely just had the most embarrassing moment of his life and at such an age. He's incredibly vulnerable here, and yet you still chose him. The first look at the tree, he can’t believe he still has you; you still want him. So much admiration, awe, and love in his eyes. And maybe some sadness? Sad he almost ruined things. Like he’d be so heartbroken if you suddenly changed your mind. He still looks like he’s waiting for that dreadful moment you push him away, but is just so grateful to have you for as long as he can. A man who doesn’t want to ruin this.
Then when he goes down, that vulnerability in his eyes is still there. The curve in his brows. The uncertainty when he asks for consent. By this point in the scene, you can’t turn him down anymore, you are locked in. So essentially, you’ve made it very clear to Halsin that you want him just as much as he wants you. But he’s still not that confident yet. It's like he goes down not just because he wants to, but because he also wants to ensure he pleases you, that he can be so good to you. But he's still unsure if it’s okay to proceed.
Depending on the dialogue choices you make are what generate the different looks, but I seem to always get the more “confident” look more than the other. I can’t remember the exact order of choices… maybe I can go back to an old clip and try to find it if anyone wants to experiment for themselves!
Anyway, maybe I’m reading too much into it, but that’s what I do. I love discovering the tiniest details, even if others have noticed it long before. But this just made me love Halsin even more. And hopefully it made all the Halsin lovers love him much more too!
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sun-kissy · 6 months ago
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could I request an x reader with fem! X Fred Weasley (if you don’t want to write for him I’m more then fine with whoever else you choose x)
anyway reader is insecure in the relationship (mostly just anxious about physical touch because she’s worried he won’t like it? Idk how to describe but just basically early stages of a relationship)
thanks lovely xx I adore ur work
hi gorgeous! so i decided to do this with remus, i hope it’s okay. thank you for the request! :)
everything you need | r.l.
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tw: hurt/comfort, fluff
remus lupin x reader
You couldn’t stop the ache from blooming in your chest even if you tried. There’s a strong feeling of absence as you stare helplessly at Remus, pressed against the other side of the couch with his eyes glued to the television.
It’s always been a desire, to be touched. To be held is to be loved, your mother used to say. You craved the simple feeling of having your hair brushed off your face, the fat of your hip being pinched teasingly, or being held in tight hugs which squeeze all the sad out of you. You can’t remember the last time you were touched like that.
Remus and you had started dating a few weeks ago, and he really was a sweetheart; and everything you ever needed. Always buying you little trinkets whenever he came over, cooking you dinner, and writing you lovely little notes — that was how he showed his love, and you adored him for it.
But you were fraught with the need to feel his touch — for those kisses to last a little longer, those hugs to be a smidge tighter, and soft cuddles to be more frequent.
You didn’t quite know if it was alright for you to ask, though. You had only just started dating, you weren’t even his girlfriend yet. And you knew Remus was the type to show his love in soft, subtle ways, not in overt means like openly touching and holding you. What if he felt like you were going too fast? You couldn’t risk driving him away.
Remus seems to pick up on the cogs turning in your head and the faraway look in your eyes as you ogle at him. He arches an eyebrow and his mouth twists in a frown as he turns his body towards you. “Sweetheart?”
You blink dazedly. “Hm?”
“Are you okay? You looked a little lost there for a second,” he asks, not unkind in the least.
“I’m fine,” you croak, though all you can think about at the moment is brushing that stray curl away from his face. “Was just thinking about work.”
You know he doesn’t buy it, taking a second too long to answer. But being the gentleman he is, he smiles softly and indulges you. “Okay, dove, if you say so. Don’t stress too much about it, yeah?”
He reaches for the television remote beside him and presses the pause button. “I’m gonna go serve us dinner. You want sauce with your fries?”
“Yeah, sure,” you mutter distractedly, not realising how transfixedly you were gazing at his body, resisting the temptation to crawl into his lap and ask for a hug.
Remus stands up, bending down to press a quick kiss to your forehead. You startle, fighting the urge to grab his wrist and pull him back towards you. You want it so badly, but you can’t let him. You can’t let yourself.
He gives you a bemused smile as he makes a beeline into the kitchen. As soon as he’s out of sight, you heave a sigh and slump backwards on the sofa, wrapping your arms tightly around your waist. You wished he were hugging you instead, with his gentle touches and saccharine words.
You let your eyes flutter closed, squeezing yourself as tight as one possibly can. It helps, a little. You rub your arms desperately, teeth roughly biting down on your bottom lip to stop yourself from bursting out in tears.
In a moment, you hear the clinking of cutlery against plates as Remus sets your dishes down on the table. Before you even open your eyes fully, he’s crouching in front of you and needling your arms apart to press his hands to your back. He pulls you towards him, your face pressing against the crook of his neck.
The feel of his skin on yours is almost painful, and you want to pull away. “Remus,” you choke out, desperately trying to keep your voice even.
“Yeah?” It’s nothing more than a soft murmur as he tucks his chin on your shoulder, pressing his palms into your shoulder blades.
You want to ask him why he was hugging you, tell him that everything was fine. But you know he’s already figured you out.
“You don’t have to,” you say instead.
“Why not?” he asks gently, the feel of his breath warm on your skin. “You want this.” It’s a statement, not a question.
“But…” you hate how you’re warbling. “You don’t have to do this, if it’s not what you want. We agreed to go slow.”
“Going slow means I can’t hug you?” he asks softly, but you hear the teasing in his voice.
“No,” you say quickly, feeling the ache in your chest start to worsen. “But I don’t know if you want to touch me, if you want to be touched. I — I know you have different ways of showing your love, and I’ll take any love you can give me —“
“Angel,” Remus breathes, making you stop short. “This isn’t a job offer. I’ll show you love however you want me to.” He tilts his head up to press a kiss to your hair, and the ache starts to soften. “You’re allowed to want this,” he murmurs, like he’s reading your mind.
That pulls a soft sob out of you, as you ball up the fabric of his T-shirt in your hands and cling to it. You wanted this so much, it feels almost ethereal now that you’re getting it.
Remus coos sympathetically, his joints cracking painfully as he kneels down fully. He doesn’t mind in the slightest. He starts to gently knead your scalp, his other hand coasting from one shoulder to the other on your back.
You feel like maybe he doesn’t deserve this, your tears and your demandingness. You feel like you have to explain yourself. “I just —“ you try, his heart squeezing at the unnaturally high pitch.
Remus pulls back slightly, making sure to continue to squeeze the fat at your shoulders kindly. He knows you need the touch. His eyebrows bunch up in worry because of how distraught you look. “I…” you mean to apologise. But all that comes out is a timid, “I just really like hugs.”
His expression softens, and you almost see his lips curve upwards. His heart feels like it’s swelling because of how adorable you look, even with your red, puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks. “Yeah?” he breathes softly.
You nod meekly, sniffling as you train your eyes on the ground. He notes the pink starting to coat your cheeks, and resists the urge to beam and kiss you stupid.
He gently cups your cheek and begins to thumb it, relieved when you melt into his touch instead of pulling away. “I like hugs, too.”
“No, you don’t.”
Remus lets out a soft chuckle at your slightly accusatory tone. “If you want hugs, sweetheart, I’ll give them to you. I really don’t mind. In fact, I’d hold you 24/7 if you wanted.”
“You would?” your eyes light up a bit as you tilt your head up to look at him with a hopeful gaze.
He smiles sympathetically — he can’t believe you were so upset over something he would so easily give you. He wasn’t exactly used to physical touch, but for you, he was willing to try. “I would, dove.”
Remus can’t stop the lovesickness which drips into his voice like honey as he thumbs at your cheeks. He ducks his head to meet your eyes, grinning when you meet his gaze and give him a small smile. “Sweetheart, I wanna be with you for the long haul. So you have to tell me when something’s wrong, okay?”
“Okay,” you mumble, flustered with the attention. You felt yourself melting at the affection in his gaze.
This time, he can’t stop the wide smile from curving his lips as he cups your cheeks and presses a soft kiss to your nose. “I love you, sweet thing. Just say the word, and I’ll give you everything you need.”
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teapartyprincess4two · 8 months ago
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Y/n and Matt get closer when it's just them 2 in the house, and i was thinking Fluff and Smut like a lot of Smut. Maybe Matt is a virgin but Y/n aint so she teaches him???
End of the World- M. Sturniolo
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pairing: fem!reader x Matt
classification: Zombie Apocalypse AU, smut, fluff, angst/sad (kinda? Idk it’s a mix of everything)
inspiration: request^^
warnings: 18+, MDNI, set in modern day, use of y/n, literal sex, slight cursing, zombies & general apocalypse stuff (death, lnives, guns, killing, blood, hunger, dehydration, etc.), kinda long
summary: No one deserves to die a virgin, not even at the end of the world.
If anyone would’ve told you two years ago that you’d be huddled around the hood of a car, staring down at a worn out map, covered in blood, you would’ve called them crazy.
Two years ago your life was convenient. Now? Now life was simple, all you had to do was survive. All the things you wished would disappear; homework, bills, work, none of them mattered anymore. But they were easily replaced with an even greater burden, a zombie apocalypse and the end of the world.
Two years ago you wouldn’t have had even a spec of dirt under your fingernails, yet here you stand covered in blood that isn’t yours, weeks worth of dirt and grime, and sweat dripping down your forehead. Your hair is pulled back into a ponytail, exposing your shoulders to the harsh Texas heat and further working towards dehydrating you.
Two years ago you wouldn’t so much as hurt a fly. Now you wouldn’t think twice before pulling the trigger if it meant you had a chance at survival.
Two years ago you didn’t have to worry about where your next meal was coming from or if your bedroom was secure enough to sleep in. But the world has changed and so have you.
It’s been months since anyone in your group has had a good nights rest or a warm meal. All you’ve done is run from anything that threatens to harm you. Although you’ve all managed to set up a temporary moderately safe camp within the woods, it’s been difficult to stretch resources that are already scarce.
Food, water, clothing. These are all things that you wish you didn’t need. Why? Because leaving camp to retrieve them is dangerous. But, it’s been 2 days since your last run, and canned goods can only last so long, especially when there’s mouths to feed.
Chris uses his knife to point to an unmarked location on the map, “Nick and I will head south. I saw an old water tower in that direction when we passed through, maybe there’s a town nearby.” He uses the back of his arm to wipe the sweat from his forehead before returning it back to the map, tracing the blade up a road.
“Matt and Y/n, you two try looking in this area. We haven’t checked there yet and if we’re lucky it hasn’t been completely ransacked. You might find something…” Chris pauses, taking a look at the group of people not far behind. They’re chatting, all of them wearing exhausted expression and filthy clothes. “…something to get the group through the next couple of days. We can’t stay here anymore, place is crawling with infected.”
Chris became the leader of your group easily. He had a great way of talking to people, of showing them that even though the world was ending, the glass was still half full.
“You want us to split up?” Nick whisper shouts, a clear alarm evident in his tone. “Remember what happened last time? We lost a third of the group!” Nick flails his arms in desperation, almost like he’s willing Chris to realize the stupidity of his actions.
Nick was reasonable and smart, but too kind for his own good. If he wanted to, he could’ve become the leader of your group and done just as good of a job as Chris, but Nick was too empathic to take on that responsibility. He felt the needs of the group and often was led more by emotion than by reason or logic.
“You think I don’t know that?!” Chris bites back.
You stand next to Matt, watching the argument unfold. This was typical for Nick and Chris, but it stressed you out every time.
“If we had more people, we wouldn’t have to split up. But we’re low on supplies and can’t wait around for food to magically appear,” Chris says.
“If we hadn’t split up the first time, we’d have more people,” Nick snarks, storming away. Chris groans, running his hand through his hair. This was much more responsibility than he could handle, but as the youngest, strongest members of your group it was up to you all to pull the heaviest weight.
“We’ll be fine. Y/n and I are always careful,” Matt finally chimes in, placing a firm hand on Chris’s shoulder to ease any tension. “Besides, that part of town is pretty deep into the woods. I doubt any infected will be lurking and if they are, Y/n’s good with a gun and I’m fast.”
“I’m fast too,” you chuckle, knowing that Matt is trying to make light of a dark situation.
“True. I just gotta be faster,” he replies, sending you a cheeky wink. You laugh, earning a small round of laughter from Chris and Matt in return.
Chris visibly relaxes, grateful that at least one of his brothers isn’t giving him a hard time. But truth be told, Matt didn’t agree with Chris’s plan, he was just smart enough to keep it to himself. He knew that doubt created fear, and once fear infected you, you were as good as dead.
That’s what Matt was good at, being quiet. It came in handy on runs like this, especially because he was so quick on his feet. It’s your favorite characteristic of his, he’s a good listener, he’s observant, and you know that you’ll be safe as long as Matt is with you.
“Alright. Let’s head out, we’re gonna lose the light,” Chris instructs, jogging in the opposite direction of the camp to begin loading up a few trucks with guns and ammo.
“You two can take the car.”
Matt mulls the idea over. A car would be faster, but definitely much louder. Noise attracts anything looking for its next meal, especially the infected, and with only you to cover him he’s not sure he’s willing to take that risk.
“Nah. We’re walking. The town’s not too far, we’ll make it back by tomorrow morning the latest,” Matt replies, tossing a rifle in your direction. You’re quick to catch it and just as quick to respond, “Are you sure? A car would get us there and back before dinner.”
He understands your concern, but he can’t risk losing you, not after all the losses he’s already suffered. “Just trust me,” he murmurs, the look in his eyes being enough to calm your nerves.
“Whatever you have to do, Matt. Just come back,” Chris says, slamming the trunk shut.
Leaves and dry grass crunch under your feet with every step. It’s late summer and the Texas heat has managed to kill everything left alive that wasn’t infected.
You’ve been walking for two hours, only running into a few infected on the way, managing to take them out with nothing but your blade. Matt hates using guns, in fact you’ve only seen him use them on very rare and necessary occasions. You never understood his apprehension, I mean it’s the end of the world for Christ’s sake, but you’ve never questioned him.
“Heads up,” Matt whispers, nodding his head in the direction of a gas station.
You follow his gaze. It seemed like an easy place to loot. Apart from the few rotted corpses that roamed the exterior, only parked cars litter the parking lot, most of them still connected to the gas pumps.
“We’ll go in through the back. There’s got to be dry storage there,” Matt says, crouching and leading you towards the back of the building. You hum in response, readying yourself with your weapon and following closely behind.
Your scent must carry because as soon as you’re within 10 feet of the infected, their attention is drawn to you. Their arms are limp at their sides and their walk is more of a stagger, but it always manages to get your blood pumping.
“Hurry!” Matt whisper shouts, reaching behind him for your hand. Soon he’s pulling you into the building, shutting it securely behind you and bringing his pointer finger up to his lips to instruct you to keep quiet.
“I’ll go left. You go right,” you mouth, beginning to walk the aisles of the store while ensuring to keep your back to the wall. Matt nods, perusing the aisles as best he can while his life is in immediate danger.
Infected bite and claw at the glass windows, snarling as they watch you and Matt like prey. Sometimes you wondered what their life was like before they were bit, but the second one is close enough to harm you, all sympathy leaves and you don’t think twice before unloading the clip.
When you’re sure the building is secure you put your knife away and grab a shopping basket, securing it in the pit of your elbow as you load it with as many supplies as you can. Chips, jerky, candy, canned food, oil, rags, water, any and everything you two can carry is being thrown into these baskets.
“How are gonna get all of this back?” You ask Matt, noticing the even greater pile he’s accumulated. He scratches his head, taking a look around for something that’ll help lighten the load.
From the corner of his eye he spots a few duffel bags. Matt grabs a few and motions for you to begin packing them with as much as possible. “If they get too heavy I’ll carry them.”
“Bet you wish we had a car now,” you chuckle, neatly organizing the duffel bags.
“Not when those things are staring back at me,” Matt says, shuddering as he looks behind his shoulder to see the group of infected that have pooled at the entrance of the building.
You’re carrying two duffel bags full of supplies, one weighing on either one of your shoulders. Matt’s holding three, two rest on his shoulders and he’s carrying the other in his hand. He holds the straps so tight that his knuckles have managed to turn white.
The both of you are exhausted from the strength you’re using to carry this supplies back to your camp, from the long trek up-hill, and the energy you exerted to take out at least a dozen infected.
You stumble on a rock, the weight on your shoulders making it difficult for you to fix your footing. “Hey, you okay?” Matt asks, examining you with his eyes.
“I’m fine. Just tired,” you wheeze, hunching over and supporting yourself with your hands on your knees.
Matt’s tired too, of course he is, but it’s not like you two can set up camp in the middle of nowhere while surrounded by infected. He remembers seeing a few houses further up the road, it’s not a long walk and if you can make it, you’ll be able to rest there until morning.
“C’mon I think I saw a neighborhood, just push through a little longer. We’ll rest there for tonight and pick back up in the morning, okay?”
He waits for you to catch your breath, rubbing your back and comforting you, but never once letting his guard down in case something gets a jump on him.
You take a deep breath, straightening up and adjusting the duffel bag’s straps on your shoulders.
“Okay.”
The walk to the neighborhood was much longer than you thought, and you were starting to wonder if you were lost.
“Are you sure this is the right way?”
Matt looks at you from behind his shoulder, subtly rolling his eyes before averting his gaze forward again. “You wanna lead the way, princess?”
The nickname makes you chuckle, mostly because you knew Matt used it when his mood was starting to sour and that only ever happened when he was hungry or tired. By the looks of it, he was starting to become both.
A small town comes into view just as you’re about to reply. It looks like you’ve stumbled across the Main Street, and as packed as it is with abandoned businesses and stores, a residential home is nowhere to be seen. “Didn’t I tell you I saw a town,” Matt snarks, a hint of sass laced in his tone.
You hum. “No. You said you saw a neighborhood. There isn’t a house anywhere to be seen. We might as well season ourselves for the damn infected to eat.”
A twig snaps in the distance. Your voices, although relatively quiet, have already worked towards alerting the undead of your presence.
“Shut up,” Matt grits, pulling you close to his body. You know better than to argue, instead pressing your back against his and unsheathing your knife.
Snarling and growling echoes through the town, bouncing off the buildings and making it difficult for you to pinpoint exactly what direction they’re coming from. That doesn’t stop Matt though, instead he uses the hand that isn’t holding a knife to grab your arm.
“Stay close,” he mouths, so inaudible that you almost don’t catch it. You nod your head, taking a fleeting look at your surroundings before following Matt through a back alley between a cafe and a gym (or what used to be a cafe and a gym).
The alley is a dead end, fenced off at the end with nothing but hungry zombies reaching through the metal rods in attempt to grab you. The old you would’ve screamed and cried for help, but you’ve learned to suppress your fear in order to survive.
You take a firm hold of your knife, stabbing it into the head of as many infected as you can. Quiet grunts emit from you and Matt as you clear the path, watching undead body after body hit the ground. For a second you feel sad, but only for a second. You don’t have time for trivial things such as emotions anymore, especially not when a trail of flesh eating monsters follows closely behind.
“Through here. C’mon,” Matt ushers, opening a door that leads into a gym. Although it’s safer than being stranded outside, the brick walls can only protect you for so long. You do a quick sweep of the room, looking for anything useful while also ensuring there aren’t any hidden surprises.
Once you’re sure it’s safe, you motion for Matt to follow you with a head tilt. He locks the door behind him, barricading it with an old elliptical before following you into the next room.
You enter a changing room, lined with showers and lockers that were sure to have at least one fresh pair of clothes. You set the heavy bags you’ve been carrying down, sighing with relief as you stretch your shoulders. Matt does the same, joining you in rummaging through the lockers for a new, clean shirt.
A lot of the clothes is tucked away in backpacks, most of it being unflattering male clothing, but you weren’t big on fashion nowadays. “Here. Found this for you,” Matt says, tossing a white tank top your way. You hold it up in the light, “Cute. Thanks.”
You’re about to change your shirt, without any real warning for Matt, so he quickly looks away and fixes his gaze on the shower heads and tiled walls. His hands fiddled with an unopened bar of soap he found in one of the lockers. Matt doesn’t know why he grabbed it, it’s not like he had access to running water, but a man could dream.
“I wonder if the showers work,” he thinks out loud.
You stand behind him, wearing only your bra and underwear as you wonder the same thing. God knows you could both use a shower right now. “Hmm,” you hum, tilting your head in wonder.
“Only one way to find out,” you shrug, pushing past Matt and sauntering over to the knob. You twist it quickly, patiently waiting for even a single drop of water.
Nothing, just groaning pipes and a slap in the face for naivety.
“Guess they don’t,” you say, standing under the shower head and looking at Matt with a sad smile. He chuckles, and just as he’s about to give up too, hot water spurts out abruptly, hitting the back of your head and running down your spine.
“Holy shit that’s hot!” You gasp. In all the excitement, Matt forgets how inappropriate it would be to join you in the shower under regular circumstances, and throws his clothes off. You’ve somehow already managed to remove your remaining clothing and have started scrubbing at your skin with your bare hands, letting the water run down your face.
“Matt! Hurry before it runs out!” You say, waving your hand behind you blindly. He doesn’t skip a beat, joining you under the shower head and letting it relax his sore, aching muscles. The water draws an audible groan from his lips, bringing you back to reality. You were naked and taking a shower with Matt, someone who was a stranger to you before the end of the world.
Suddenly, he remembers the bar of soap still in his hands and he accidentally takes in your naked figure as he opens it. His dick immediately rises, a clear indicator that he’s enjoying the view.
“Turn around,” he instructs, running the soap under the water and lathering his hands up. You do as your told, immediately feeling his fingers tangle themselves in your hair as he massages your scalp. It wasn’t necessarily an in depth hair wash routine, but it would suffice for now.
Soon, you’re turning around and rinsing the soap from your hair before reaching for the bar and instructing Matt to do the same.
“Here lemme get you now.” You shuffle behind him, tip toeing to reach better. Although it was odd and unexpected, you were glad to be sharing this moment with Matt.
The rest of the shower is silent as you and Matt bask in the warm water that runs down your bruised and battered bodies. You try keeping your limbs to yourselves, save for the brief moments Matt’s erect member brushes against your thigh or butt, but it’s hard when there’s only one shower head. You want to say something, mostly because you’ve had a crush on Matt from the moment you met him and his group, but you don’t. This isn’t about pleasure, not in this world at least. It’s about survival and the second you forget that, you get hurt.
“Haven’t felt that clean in years,” Matt chuckles, shoving a shirt over his head. The shower seems to have brought his spirits up, providing both of you with a new surge of energy. Little things like running water meant so much more now, especially when you’re trudging through highly forested areas and fighting for you life on the daily.
As you’re about to reply, a loud bang echoes through the locker room, followed by the sound of shuffling in your direction. You’re putting your pants on, buckling them quickly as you try to keep quiet. Your eyes are wide in fear and anticipation, watching Matt for a signal on what to do next.
He doesn’t say anything, instead grabbing the duffel bags from before and darting his eyes towards the exit. Your gun, which you hadn’t used at all today, rests in your hand. Matt holds his as well. He’s on guard, raising the weapon close to his face as he inspects the area.
You follow behind him trying to keep as quiet as possible, fully expecting him to shoot whatever lurks behind the wall. But, as you near the exit, you see it.
Tense shoulders relax, lowering your weapon and sheathing it back into your belt. A squirrel sits on the cement floor, grooming itself and chittering away. You want to approach it, maybe even pet it, but Matt stops you with a hand to your chest.
Unlike you, he’d inspected the entirety of the situation and didn’t let himself become distracted by the first cute animal that crossed his path. After recognizing that it was a squirrel, he wondered what could’ve lead it into the building in the first place, causing him to check the window it entered through. A reanimated corpse stood right outside the window, dragging its feet as it paced back and forth in search of the fluffy animal.
“Let’s go. We’re done here,” Matt ordered, pulling you back towards the exit. And just like that, you were off to find somewhere to sleep, leaving the fluffy animal to fend for itself.
“Bye little guy.”
“Forgot how quiet and boring the world is,” you huff, slumping down onto the worn out mattress. Whatever energy the shower provided you was now long gone. You and Matt walked for another hour before finding the initial neighborhood you were searching for. And, after that, you spent another hour finding the perfect house and clearing all its rooms.
“Quiet’s nice,” Matt replies with a soft groan, joining you on the mattress. It sinks with his weight, the coils creaking as he becomes comfortable.
“You’re just saying that cause you want me to shut up so you can fall asleep.” You kick your shoes off and unbuckle your belt, letting it fall to floor with a soft thud. A smile tugs at Matt’s lips. “Right now yes. But in general, quiet’s good. Means we’re safe,” he replies, toeing his own shoes off.
Matt shuts his eyes, fluffing the pillow under his head and willing himself to finally get a full nights rest. This house is safe. He secured all the rooms, barricaded the doors, and his weapon is on standby. He can finally rest and relax. But, of course, your mind begins to wander and when your mind wanders, your words follow. “Guess you’re right… But quiet also means you’re not learning anything about the people you care about.”
A deep breath causes Matt’s chest to rise and fall. He doesn’t understand why you’re trying to be all philosophical at the end of the world. Nonetheless, he responds, “I know you, Y/n. I know you’re strong, I know you’re a kind person, and I know you have my back. I also know you’re annoying, but I trust you and I learned all that from watching. Sometimes you just have to watch people. In quiet. Can we sleep now?” He turns onto his side facing away from you in hopes that you’ll drop the topic and fall asleep.
You stare at his back. “Those are all things you learned about me now. I was nothing like this back then.”
Matt takes another deep breath. It’s obvious you’re in the mood to talk, maybe because you finally feel safe enough to keep your voice anything above a whisper, so he decides just to give in and turn your monologue into actual dialogue.
“Back then?” He asks. Matt shuffles on the mattress, now staring at the ceiling as your eyes remain on him. “Yeah, before everything went to shit. Before the end of the stupid fucking world when the little things used to matter. You know, like first kisses and picking the perfect outfit for a date with a cute guy.”
Matt picks at his fingernails, listening to every word that escapes your lips. When you put it that way, he really didn’t know anything about you. “Okay, so tell me about yourself then. Pretend like we’re not in a strangers house, in a strangers room, on a strangers bed, and tell me all about Y/n… Before the ‘end of the stupid fucking world.’”
You chuckle, preparing yourself for the vulnerability you’re about to put on full display, but now that he’s put you on the spot it’s much harder than you thought.
“Okay so… you already know my name. Hmm. My favorite color is pink?”
Matt scoffs. “That’s the real you? C’mon, you can’t go on this whole tangent about how you were different before and then say THAT.”
“Fine fine.” You think for a second. “I was a waitress at a hotel bar. Mixing drinks was easy, the customers were nice, my coworkers made the job tolerable. Mostly only worked weekends because I was at school during the week… I went to UCLA. Go Bruins!,” you let out a breathy laugh, “My siblings were going to visit me that weekend, the weekend it all happened. They had planned the trip for a long time and finally were gonna make the drive.”
Your mind goes to a dark place, the only thing anchoring you being the hand that Matt places on yours. You clear your throat before continuing, “I had a small off campus apartment. Cleared the living room out and everything for them. Even deep cleaned.” Matt squeezes your hand.
“College was fun while it lasted. My parents worked really hard to send me off. They threw me a going away party and everything, even dressed up my dog as the school mascot,” a small pause as you recollect your thoughts, “I had a puppy named Pig. Well he wasn’t a puppy, more like an old fart, but the name suited him. Named him after my favorite animal and because he had the pinkest nose when he first adopted him.”
You feel yourself becoming increasingly sad as you reminisce on what once was. “You know what? Maybe quiet is nice,” you laugh solemnly, wiping the tears that are rolling down your face.
Matt offers you a warm smile, thinking of something, anything, to get you to smile again. But he can’t help it, he’s curious, and since you’re already on the topic he wants to pry further into your personal life. “What were you going to school for?”
“Engineering. I’m shit with numbers, but I was pretty undecided so my parents just chose for me. Brandon would help me a lot. He was really smart… really sweet… But enough about me, tell me about you. Who was Matt before all this?”
Matt ignores your question, instead posing one of his own. “Who’s Brandon? Was he your boyfriend?” He cringes slightly, both at his boldness and at his lack of awareness of your vulernable, emotional state, but his curiosity keeps getting the best of him.
You snort. “Brandon? God no. He was my best friend, sure, but I was definitely not his type. Plus, I never had time for anything serious. I made time for the fun stuff, but never the commitment.” Matt couldn’t hide the relief on his face even he tried. A relationship status meant nothing during a zombie apocalypse, yet he found himself relieved to know that your heart didn’t belong to another.
“I’m sure you had girls swarming you,” you continue jokingly, poking Matt’s sides with a teasing edge. He makes a noise, something between a groan and chuckle as he runs his hands down his face.
“I take that as a yes?”
He hums, remembering the short lived internet fame he shared with his triplet brothers before shit hit the fan. “Some would say that. If you consider subscribers and followers as swarming girls.”
You visibly cringe, “Oh God. Were you one of those thirst trappers? Bet you went to influencer parties and vlogged your morning routine.” Matt laughs loudly, a genuine laugh, one of the few you’ve heard from him since you met.
“Rent was due, okay?” He replies between laughter. Soon you’re both laughing, bodies clumsily bumping as you clutch your stomach and wipe away tears. Your bodies are impossibly close, closer than they should be on a queen sized mattress, and you only notice it once your laughter dies down.
Your eyes have locked with his and your noses even manage to graze. Neither of you make an effort to look away or even to apologize for invading the other’s space. Instead, you do the unthinkable, the one thing you didn’t allow yourself to even think about doing even when he was naked in front of you earlier. You kiss him. You lean forward and close the gap, moulding your lips onto his.
Matt doesn’t hesitate to reciprocate the kiss. His hands find a comfortable resting place on your upper thigh and lower back, using the little energy left in his body to pull you closer. One of your hands lays on his chest while the other gently weaves its way through his hair.
The kiss is sweet and innocent, and it could’ve been over by now, but because you’re both so touch starved you separate for air and dive right back in. You moan against his lips, caressing the side of his face your thumb before moving so you’re cradling his waist. Subconsciously, as if on instinct, you grind down onto him, wanting to feel and explore him further.
Matt wants to go further, and he knows you know it too, especially with the display he put on earlier in the shower, but he’s a virgin who’s afraid to disappoint. So, he pulls away from the kiss and holds your hips in place with strong hands.
“I— Give me a second,” he murmurs, squeezing his eyes shut and gulping so hard his adam’s apple bobs up and down. Matt’s mind is racing, every possible outcome for this situation playing through his mind.
You sense his apprehension, plus it’s written all over his face. You never want to push his boundaries or make him uncomfortable. So, you do the only thing you can think to do. Quickly, you shuffle off of him and off the bed. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. I just thought— today in the shower— I’ll sleep downstairs on the couch.”
You begin to gather your things, leaving Matt dumbstruck as he stares between you and his raging erection. If he didn’t speak up now, you were going to get the wrong idea and he’d miss his chance at a shot with you. Your face is red hot with embarrassment.
“Wait.” He reaches out and grabs your hand, gently pulling you back down onto the mattress.
Matt prepares himself for the vulnerability he’s about to display. He’s nervous, embarrassed, scared, and to top it off you’re the hottest girl he’s ever seen. And it’s not just because you’re the only one left either.
“I’m a virgin.”
Your eyes blow open in shock. “But earlier you said about the? I just thought?” He laughs at your inability to form a coherent sentence, but he gets the gist.
“It was hard to trust people when I was famous, especially girls. I never knew if they truly liked me or just wanted to have my name associated with them for the clout. But it’s different now, I know I can trust you. We took a shower together without making it weird after scavenging through old worn out clothes to find something slightly newer than what we had. You’re covered in the blood of monsters we killed to keep each other safe. You’re here with me when I have nothing permanent or safe to offer.” Matt pulls you back onto his lap, sitting up against the bed frame so your torsos are parallel.
“I should’ve said this a long time ago, but it’s hard to find the time when you’re fighting for your life on the daily… I care about you, Y/n. A lot. I’m not sure what to call it yet, but I care about you and I trust you. I trust you enough to do this.” You’re touched by his words, feeling their effect on your heartstrings and your throbbing core.
“I trust you too, Matt. So much more than you’ll ever know.” In that moment those words felt more real than an ‘i love you’ ever could. Matt leans forwards and kisses you, holding you by the neck. This kiss is different than the one from before, it’s needier and laced with lust.
His hands travel towards your tank top, tugging until he successfully untucks the fabric. You pull away from the kiss and lift your arms, allowing Matt to remove your shirt in one swift motion. The smile on his face as you slowly begin roaming your hands all over his body is genuine, filled with admiration, love and lust.
Your fingers beginning slipping his flannel over his shoulders, your mouth falling down to his broad shoulders to pepper kisses on the skin there. Soon, you’re both removing the rest of your clothes and Matt’s excitement has him flipping you over on the old, worn mattress. He gawks at the sight beneath him. You lay there completely exposed with only the soft moonlight that trickles in through the blinds to illuminate your body. Matt takes it all in, relishing in your beauty like it’s the last time, because in this world it very well might be.
A gentle hand trails from his stomach down to his penis, tracing the outside of his cock and watching intently at the way Matt’s eyes screw shut in concentration. It’s been so long since he’s touched himself and the sight of you alone is enough for him to combust, but he pulls himself together. You trace your thumb over the slit, coating his member with the natural lubrication that’s already spilling out before dragging his cock along your folds. Matt’s breath hitches at the new sensation, you already feel so warm and soft, he doesn’t know how he’s meant to last even one second once he’s actually inside you.
“We can stop if you want to.” Matt gulps, shaking his head feverishly. He doesn’t want this to stop, he’d never want this to stop, even if it hasn’t even really started yet. “No,” his voice is choked, “don’t stop.”
Your lip is caught between your teeth as you continue to guide the tip to your entrance, finally unwrapping your fingers from around him and instead wrapping your legs around his waist. Finally, Matt moves, sinking his cock into you slowly until he’s completely bottomed out. The initial feeling is euphoric, so euphoric in fact that his arms wobble as he tried to keep himself from collapsing on you. You love seeing him like this. A strong man who’d do anything to protect you, so weak and vulnerable from your touch.
His head finds the place where your neck and shoulder meet, forehead resting in the divot there as he slowly begins thrusting. Soft grunts and groans brush against your skin, sending shivers up your spine. Praises fall from your own lips as his tip continues to kiss your cervix, egging him further in helping you reach your climax. But tonight was about him, as long as the man on top of you convulsed with pleasure you’d be happy.
Matt’s hips snap against yours, picking up the pace as he chases his orgasm. It’s so close, right on the edge, and from the way he sounds and feels you’re close too. “Keep going, Matt. Don’t stop,” you moan, pulling him in closer with your legs around his waist. Matt whimpers your name, sucking and biting on the skin of your neck harder with each passing thrust.
“I’m gonna cum,” he grunts, words choppy and interrupted by pants and moans. All you can do is whimper in return, snaking a hand between your bodies to rub your clit. As soon as your fingers touch the sensitive bundle of nerves, your body goes into overdrive. Your legs are shaking, pussy fluttering around his cock as you grip his shoulders and moan his name. The feeling of your walls pushing and pulling around him, mixed with the way you chant his name, pushes Matt over the edge. His hips tremble slightly as he spills his load inside of you, his inexperience making it to where he’s unable to pull out before the wave of pleasure washed over his body.
Your bodies remain intertwined for a while, both of you trying to catch your breath. Matt reluctantly pulls out of you, relishing in the way your body chases after him. The mattress dips as he slumps into the spot next to you.
“Thank you.”
You turn to face Matt, a confused look on your face. You’re not sure where this will lead your relationship, but you never expected a thank you after sex, nor had you ever received one.
“Thank you?” You chuckle, curious to where the conversation was heading.
He hums. “Yeah, for not letting me die a virgin.” You can’t help the snort that follows.
“Well in that case, I guess you’re welcome. No one deserves to die a virgin, not even at the end of the world.”
Matt smiles again, a sight you’ll never grow tired of. He leans in for a kiss, pulling you close and keeping you there. The kiss is sloppy, mostly because you’re both exhausted from the days events, but neither of you dare pull away. You don’t know what tomorrow will bring or if there will even be a tomorrow, all you know is that this moment right here is real and you’d like to enjoy it for as long as possible.
“Get some rest, we have a long trip tomorrow.”
MASTERLIST
A/n:
Thank you so much for this request my sweet anon. I’m currently rewatching (binging) TWD and needed to get some zombie apocalypse type story out of my system, so I hope you don’t mind that I used that idea on your request. Also, I know you requested for the reader to teach Matt and I didn’t include really any of that here. I focused on the whole Virgin!Matt aspect of it all. Hope you all enjoy, sorry for not writing a lot recently :P I’m deep in the trenches of Daryl Dixon fanfiction right now so if u need me, that’s where you’ll find me (if u can’t already tell by my reblogs lolol)
ps, I didn’t go to UCLA so if that’s not the mascot don’t kill me. A quick google search told me that much
luv u all xxx
- L.A.M.B 💗👼🏻
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daydreams-after-dark · 8 months ago
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Good things come in small packages
Part 1 | Part 2
Pairing: Mini Han x fem reader
Synopsis: One year ago you purchased a ‘miniature companion’ named Hannie. He’s the size of a Ken doll but alive and horny. But something unexpected happens on your one year anniversary.
Word count: approx 2k
A/n: Hey!!! It's finally here! My Mini Han oneshot (posted in a couple of instalments because I get too excited to share). The idea for Mini Han was born through a conversation with my girl @noellllslut (we always have the most unhinged thoughts). Then I wrote a little "imagining" here (which I’ve incorporated into this fic anyway, so you don’t have to read), which then sparked quite a bit curiosity amongst you sweet/filthy readers. Questions came, and I felt compelled to explore more of this theme.
I hope you enjoy this little fic. It's sweet and smutty, and as I kept writing, I fell in love with our dear y/n and Mini Hannie. I want one for myself tbh.
CW below the cut
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CW: supernatural themes, oral sex, sexual acts, sexual themes, voyeurism
You've had your miniature human, Hannie, for almost a year?! You realize, sitting at your work desk as you look at your desktop calendar. You smile and make a note to organize a celebration for just the two of you, and to buy a cheesecake for dessert. Hannie loves cheesecake. Your smile grows. He always manages to get it all over him, then wants to get it all over you so he can lick it off you.
One year this coming weekend. It feels like time has flown, yet at the same time it feels like he’s been part of your life forever. Your heart bursts as you think back to how it all came to be.
You had been lonely. You'd broken up with your long term boyfriend and was feeling sad one night. So you went online to doom scroll, and online shop. You expected you'd end up down a rabbit hole of cat memes and be $500 down in shoe purchases, but instead an ad appeared on your screen.
"Miniature human companions" it said, with images of very attractive men. Miniature men. Were they human? Couldn't be. Were they robots? Probably. They must be really expensive to make which is why they are so small, you'd decided.
You were intrigued, so you researched the company, finding that this new type of 'companion' utilizes cutting edge technology that simulates actual human behavior and bodily functions.
By 4am you'd chosen your companion. His name was Han. He was adorable and attractive, with fluffy black hair and pouty lips, and from the personality trait notes, he sounded like a lot of fun.
"Pay Now". You can still remember the feeling of excitement that ran through you as hit the button to complete your purchase.
When he arrived, he came in a box with air holes, which you found kind of weird considering he didn't actually breathe oxygen. You set the box on your kitchen table, took a deep breath and lifted the lid. You gasped as you peered inside.
A little man, about the size of a Ken doll, sat on a blanket eating miniature crisps out of a miniature chip bag.
"Oh hello!" he looked up at you. "Are you my Noona?" he waved excitedly.
Holy fucking shit. You almost fainted as you stumbled to sit down on a dining chair.
You knew he was meant to talk, but he just seemed so real as he chewed his food then licked the seasoning off his lips like he could actually taste it. His little chest moved with his breath, like he was really breathing. Could he do everything a human can do? You wondered.
"My name’s Hannie." He said standing up and brushing the crumbs off his trousers.
"Um...I-I'm Y/n..." you stuttered, trying to process what you were witnessing,
"You're really pretty, Y/n." He beamed up at you with a gummy grin.
You prepared him a little space of his own, with a makeshift bed, clothing that you had also ordered from the company you purchased him from, and bought a set of Barbie sized cups, plates and furniture. You even bought him a Barbie Dreamhouse to live in, but he preferred to just climb up your full sized furniture and use that.
You studied the information manual that came with him and learned that he could in fact, experience life just as a human did. He needed to eat, sleep, wash, poop. Oh and he could get erections and ejaculate. Wow!
Over the next weeks and months you'd gotten yourselves into a routine, and became really close. He was your best friend. You did everything together, mostly staying at home. You assumed he was some sort of AI, and that's why you got along so well, but the longer he was with you, the more his own interests came to the surface. Like singing and Anime.
He helped you bake, often getting himself covered in flour and other ingredients. You'd watch movies together. Most nights you'd lay on the couch and he'd lay face down on your chest while you watched your favorites. Sometimes you'd feel him get hard against the curve of your breast, and you'd think inappropriate thoughts about him. You'd grow wet between your legs and wish he was able to touch you.
He loved it when you’d brush his hair with a tiny little hairbrush and sit him on your benchtop in the bathroom when you’re getting ready for the day. You know he loved it when you forgot he was there one time and you took a shower in front of him. He got so hard watching you soap up your body.
Sometimes you'd take him out on a picnic somewhere secluded near the ocean so he could freely move about the picnic blanket without fear of being seen. Or he'd sneak into your work bag and scare the shit out of you when you were working.
In the early days, you'd occasionally go on dates with actual men. Mostly to take your mind of your growing feelings for Hannie. You'd bring them home and fuck them in your bed, knowing he was somewhere watching, listening. You'd imagine him getting hard from your noises, and it made you moan even louder just picturing it. You'd imagine it was Hannie inside you too, pounding hard into your cunt, and making you come on his cock.
He was distant with you in the days after. He’d sit around sulking and pouting.
"What's wrong, Hannie?" You asked him after he’d ignored you for three days.
"Noona... it's just…I get so jealous of them." He burst into tears. "I want to do things like that to you. I want to the be the one who makes you come." He sobbed.
Things changed after that. You no longer went out with other men, and you and your miniature companion began to explore a more physical, more sexual, relationship.
From letting you see each other naked, to mutual masturbation, to eventually touching each other and making each other come.
You soon learned that even though Hannie is small, he is extremely talented with his mouth, and he can make you come harder than anyone had ever before.
One morning he noticed that you were still asleep, and very naked. The way you were laying, legs splayed out looked so inviting to him. You’d kicked your blanket off at some point. He couldn’t help himself.
You woke up to a sensation between your legs, and when you looked down you saw him kneeling between your your legs, using his arms to push your pussy lips open and doing his very best to lap at your clit.
“Hannie?” You whimpered. He stopped for a moment to stand up and wave at you, the entire front of his body dripping with your arousal. “I’ve just found my favorite thing to do!” He said enthusiastically and then he was back to being buried against your pussy.
These days, at night time he’ll climb up onto your chest while you’re lying in bed watching videos on your phone. He still loves to nestle against the bulge of your breasts, especially if you’re in a loose satin camisole, and he’ll slide himself under the fabric.
“What do you want to watch, Hannie?” You’ll ask him.
“Porn!” He’ll answer excitedly. The phone is like a giant screen to him and it’s never long before you feel him shimmying his clothes off and rubbing his little swollen erection against your skin.
He’s such a desperate little thing that you let him do whatever he needs to get himself off. Often, he’ll rub his cock along your bottom lip while he humps your tits, or he’ll scramble to suck on your nipple. He does his best to stretch his mouth around it, while he grinds against you and cumming on your soft skin. Then he’ll pass out right there. Poor little tyke gets himself tired.
Some of the kinkier things he gets you to do include tying him up and edging him until his cock becomes so painfully red and engorged that he’s crying. His naked body is delicious to look at, and you love to run the pad of your index finger over his muscles. He’s perfectly toned, his skin honey brown, and his cock is mouth-wateringly big for his frame.
He’s rendered helpless as you stroke your finger gently up and down his body. Then, using the tip of your tongue, you lick his cock carefully whilst shoving your pinky finger into his mouth.
There are times when you’ll dress up in lingerie covered in buckles and straps and he’ll climb up your body like he’s doing some kind of adventure hike. He gets so sweaty and very hard as he explores the terrain of your body.
He really is the perfect companion.
You are broken from your thoughts by your alarm signaling it's time to go home from work, and you hurry home to see your Hannie.
_____________
"Fuck! Hannie! Please... need to come...need one more...please. Don't stop." You pant. It's later that evening, and you're on the verge of your third orgasm with Hannie between your thighs sucking expertly on your clit. He's got your lips spread open as far as he can manage, and he's grinding against your core seeking his own release. Inside your pussy you've got your vibrator egg on full intensity. "Yes!!! Yes...coming!!!" You cry as you arch off the bed as you come all over him.
He quickly climbs up your body, almost slipping off because he’s covered in so much of your cream, and kneels on your chest to pump his cock until he’s spurting cum onto your tongue.
“Tastes so good, Hannie.” You show him your empty tongue, but he’s already collapsed across your body.
You clean him up and put him in his striped pajamas, before you both nestle into bed. You’re used to him sleeping on the pillow next to you now, although it took you a while to stop worrying you’d roll on him in the night.
“Noona? Did you know that tomorrow it’ll be one year since I came here?” He says sleepily.
You roll onto your side and smile. “Yes, actually I do, honey. Have a think about what you’d like to do to celebrate, okay. Anything you want."
He nods. “Yeah, I’ll think about it. But just so you know, it’ll involve me being buried in your pussy.”
————-
Han laid back on the pillow. What would he like to do to celebrate? He’d love to celebrate by being inside you. Properly. Fully.
He wishes he could do the things he'd seen those men you’d do to you all those months ago. To pin your legs up and fuck you so hard the bed would shake. He takes his mind back to when he’d hide on your shelf and watch, fucking into his hand and holding back tears of despair.
What would it be like to bend you over and fuck you from behind? What would it even be like to fuck you at all? He wants to know so bad.
But he does have a special relationship with you, he supposes. Not every guy has to stretch his mouth around a nipple or clit like he has to. Can those men be covered head to toe in your juices? Or lay completely across the bulge of your boob. No. They can’t. Only he can.
He pouts to himself.
He knows he’s got it good, you are his everything. But as he lays on the pillow next you and closes his eyes, he wonders if he’s enough for you? Could you give up real men forever, with real sized cocks that can stretch you out and fill you deep? Would you be okay with never having a boyfriend you could take out in public, or take to family events, or be seen with?
Could you settle for him? A miniature version of a man?
He sighs. "Goodnight, Noona. Love you." He whispers as he leans over and gives your giant lips a kiss.
"Goodnight, my sweet Hannie. I love you too." you reply sleepily.
As he drifts off to sleep he wishes what he always wishes. That he could be human sized and be with you like a proper human.
-----------
The morning sun peeks through your window, landing on your face and causing you to stir. You groan and try to stretch, but a heaviness across your middle keeps you in place. You peer down to find a man's arm wrapped around you, snuggling you tight.
Fear courses through your body, and you scream as you fling the arm off and jump out bed. You grab your lamp, ready to hit the intruder.
"Noona?" The man lifts his head, his dark locks falling around his face.
Your eyes almost pop out of your head when you see the confused look on his face. "Hannie!?" You choke, hands poised to strike.
"Noona? What are you doing?" he peers down at the pillow his head had been resting on, and then down the bed toward his feet. "Why is your bed so small?"
"Hannie?" You whisper, lowering the lamp, letting it drop to the floor.
"Why is everything so small? Wait. Why am I naked? Noona, have you been playing with me in my sleep?" He looks up at you confused and worried. "Noona, why are you looking at me like that?"
His eyes land on his pajamas, torn to shreds next to him. He picks up the scrap of fabric that was his pajama top, and his eyes widen. "Why are my clothes so tiny?"
"Hannie," you take in the man before you, naked and taking up most of the bed. "You're big."
To be continued…
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@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @chuuchuu1224 @fun-fanfics @rhonnie23 @jisunglyricist @strayywayy @armystay89 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @mylittleponeypinkrosieposie @kyunchoni @justforreaders @melochacco @scenuniverse @oddracha @ismokeeweed @galaxycatdrawz @jiminssluttyminx @teddy-stay @kayleefriedchicken @imperfectlyperfectprincess1
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jinnie-ret · 1 year ago
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people pleaser
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stray kids x ninth member!reader (platonic)
genre: fluff, angst
content warnings: toxic friends
word count: 3.6k
summary: in her one kid's room episode, y/n reflects on how it was hard for her not to be so kind and sweet to everyone, because she just wanted them to like her.
MAIN MASTERLIST
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
The music at the start of the video played, cutting between different things the members were saying.
"Ah, she's too kind for her own good," Seungmin shook his head with a slightly sad smile.
"She hypes everyone up, she's like a mood maker of the group," Lee Know added on.
"Y/N is very selfless," Jeongin said turning his head to the others as they nodded.
"One Kid's Room, Y/N!" Y/N smiled into the camera, relaxed into the armchair with her comfy purple fleece on.
••••••
Ever since the group's trainee days, Y/N had been a people pleaser. Not that she realised that fact about herself, until it came to the future where she would reflect on herself.
She remembered when she had seen Han around the practice rooms, and it didn't matter what he did, singing, dancing or rapping... he was talented in all areas. He was even charming to her despite his shyness occasionally. She knew for sure he'd debut soon, he was an ace after all. There were also rumours going around that her good friend Chan was creating a group to join the showcase and have a chance at debuting. She wanted to be like him, so she made a lot of effort to greet him and be kind to him.
"Hi Jisung!" she would wave at him as she passed him in the corridors of JYP Entertainment.
Of course, Han being Han, would wave back without really knowing who she was at first, but he felt too awkward to ignore her. When he spoke to his hyung about a pretty girl always saying 'hello' at him, Chan was quick to tell Han about who his friend Y/N was (and also that she was off limits because he was thinking of adding her to the group but he didn't tell Han that last part).
Soon they became more comfortable around each other and Y/N found herself practising singing songs with Han, wishing she could belt notes like he could too.
"Wow, you're so good at hitting those higher notes! I wish I could do that," Y/N turned her head towards Han, from where they were both lying down on the practice room floor, feet pointed outwards to opposite walls but their heads side by side.
"Hey, you've got a great voice too, you know?" Han quickly moved his head to the side to look at her, but decided against it and stared right back up at the ceiling.
"You really think so?" Y/N's voice wavered. She needed reassurance, she knew that herself. There was still a long way to go, but she'd get to a place she wanted with her voice one day.
"I know so. Maybe one day you could be my backup singer?" Han said casually, before belly laughing when Y/N leaned over and turned to him with a pout.
"Hannnn!" she whined.
"Yah, you know I'm joking, just keep practising, you'll do great, yeah?" Han said genuinely, before standing up and hauling her up himself as they left the practice room.
•••
The next to join the group Chan was preparing for was a boy the same age as her, Jeongin. He was cute, Y/N thought, shy as well and maybe even similar to herself in some ways for wanting the approval of others, especially their future leader.
Dropping her bag in the corner of the room, first to arrive, Y/N quickly exited the practise room realising she needed the bathroom. Only to return to see Jeongin sheepishly standing in the entrance, Han looking away and Chan stood in the middle of the room with his arms folded.
"Jeongin you should have been here ten minutes ago," the Australian guy frowned running a hand through his hair. Ten minutes? Wow, Chan could be scary sometimes, and Y/N didn't regret joining the group lineup so far, but he was pretty strict.
"I-i was just..." Jeongin tried speaking up but clearly didn't have the words to explain why, practice bag in between his legs and hands clasped nervously behind his back.
"Oh that's my fault, Chan," Y/N decided to lie for him and came forward and stood next to Jeongin, resting her hand on his shoulder as they stood at the same height, "I was showing Jeongin this video at the dorms and I insisted he watch it before we leave..." she even looked off to the side awkwardly, and that part was genuine because the moment Chan let out a huff through his nose, she felt intimidated.
"Guys.... ugh, just, get ready for practice, yeah?" Chan sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose as the two youngest rushes to one side of the room.
"Why did you do that?" Jeongin whispered, pulling out his bottle of water.
"Because I want to know why you were really late," Y/N joked and nudges his shoulder, making him laugh.
"Guys, stop messing around!" Chan rolled his eyes. Y/N wasn't so sly, he saw her bag that had already been there, and knew she hadn't arrived at the same time as Jeongin, but he allowed the excuse nonetheless.
•••
Walking back into the dorms after a busy shift at work, with school the next day, hearing a loud argument was not ideal at all for Y/N. And of course, it had to be between Han and Hyunjin. The taller boy had recently been recruited by Chan after his exceptional dance skills and potential. Perhaps Han was jealous? Y/N didn't really know, all she wanted was her bed right now but she hated the confrontation she heard.
"You can't just leave your things around everywhere! You're so messy!" Hyunjin yelled at Han.
Y/N peeked her head round the hallway after taking off her coat and shoes to see them yelling at each other in the lounge. Chan and Jeongin were nowhere to be seen - they must be out somewhere.
"I was here first! You think I care about your complaints? Get over yourself!" Han shouted, fists clenched at his sides.
"Oh so it's not ok for me to complain, but you get to act like a spoilt brat and like you're better than everyone else?!" Hyunjin yelled once more.
"Guys, what are you doing?" Y/N yawned, staring at the shouting boys who immediately flipped round to their dongsaeng.
"Oh, hey Y/N," Hyunjin's eyes softened, and so did his tone as he saw her standing there tiredly.
"What are you doing up so late?" Han questioned, glancing across at her.
"She works, remember? Gosh, you don't care about anyone but yourself and-" Hyunjin shouted before Y/N quietly cut him off with her calming demeanour.
"Stop. Just stop. You ask me why I'm up late but you two are up awake and arguing... If we're gonna be a team we can't go on like this. And that's not fair to Chan," Y/N shook her head sighing. She couldn't even look at the boys, but from the resounding silence there was she hoped her words had gotten through to them.
"I guess you're right," Hyunjin nodded, shifting awkwardly on one leg.
They all looked at Y/N as if seeing her in a whole new way, she seemed more mature than ever in that moment.
"We all have early starts tomorrow, don't we?" Y/N checked with them, chewing on her lip.
"You're right we do," Han sighed and nodded.
"Right, let's sleep then," Y/N nodded and rushed off to her room, not wanting to be in that situation again. She liked offering her advice, yes, but being the voice of reason? That felt like another level of having responsibility.
"Let's not fight again," Hyunjin whispered, tired himself, physically and emotionally.
All Han could do was roll his eyes and nod as they retreated to their rooms.
It may not have been the last time they fought, but they both put in more effort to control their emotions.
•••
3RACHA was completed. Changbin joined Han and Chan in making music and releasing in onto SoundCloud together, and despite his darker aura, the boy was one of the most caring guys she had ever met.
He would check up on her often, noticing her floating away into her own little world. It happened again one day, when Y/N was sat in the studio with the three guys, until Chan and Han went to collect lunch.
"You good, Y/Nnie?" Changbin asked, breaking the comfortable silence that was in the room.
"Hmm, yeah, why?" Y/N wiped sleep out of her eyes as she saw him staring back at her.
"It's ok, you know, to be upset, or tired," Changbin gently spoke, sensing from the start that she was a sensitive, soft soul.
"I'm not upset... I just need to improve, that's all..." Y/N sighed, curling up into a tighter ball on the sofa, tugging a blanket over her legs.
"I saw your face after the staff spoke to you," Changbin informed her, helping to straighten out the blanket.
"They just said that I shouldn't expect to be a part of the group if I'm dancing and singing the way I do and that even a rat would have done a better job," Y/N shrugged, not able to look at Changbin.
"They what? They can't say rude shit like that to you!" Changbin stood up, arms folded.
"I-it was just constructive criticism," Y/N jumped slightly, not expecting the strong reaction from her fellow group member.
"No, they were rude to you, there's a difference between constructive criticism and being rude. How is what they said helpful in any way?!" Changbin growled, shaking his head with a clenched jaw.
"I just caught them in a bad mood-" Y/N shared the thought that was playing over and over again in her head, eyes shining as she looked up at Changbin.
"No, you didn't, ok? It's alright," Changbin side hugged her to him, joining her back on the sofa, "it's ok to feel sad from what they said, I just want you to talk to me about it, I'm here. Now, come on, Chan and Han will be back with food soon."
•••
Next to join the group was a charming freckled boy, also from Australia. He had quickly grown close with Chan from their shared nationality, but Y/N craved to be close with him too. She wanted him to like her, after all, she got on well with her other members, so she found herself worrying when she hadn't really had a chance to bond with him yet.
He was a cute and loveable guy, and with the language barrier, Felix not really knowing a lot of Korean yet, Y/N felt disheartened when her words would be met with a blank look from him. She just hadn't connected the dots yet, not realising it was because her quick ramblings in Korean were an overwhelming whirlwind of incomprehensible words.
"Hi Felix! I'm so glad you joined the group, you've got such a cool voice I think it will really make us stand out!" Y/N gushed to Felix after they all did a vocal practice together.
"Thank you," Felix awkwardly answered before looking away at the ground, smiling bigger only when Chan stood next to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.
That was when Y/N decided she needed to find a better way to communicate with Felix, so she started writing notes, using an online translator to write an English translation below her Korean words, to tell him words of encouragement and show him she was there as a friend.
•••
"Thanks Y/N! See you soon, maybe," Y/N's trainee friends giggled as they left the lobby of JYP, Y/N waving goodbye to them as she zipped her purse back up.
"What was that about?" Seungmin spoke up, leant against the wall opposite her.
"Oh, umm, my friends asked if they could borrow some of my money to get some snacks," Y/N grinned, feeling happy she was able to help her friends.
"You didn't have to do that... give them your money so easily," Seungmin shook his head, walking over and standing closer to her now.
Seungmin was recognised for his polite nature and gorgeous voice, hence his joining of the group.
"It's ok, really, they needed it and plus they said they'd pay me back," Y/N defended her friends, lips pursing when she saw Seungmin frown.
"Whenever I see those friends of yours they ask for money," Seungmin was trying really hard for Y/N to see sense.
"It's fine I have a part time job for a reason," Y/N smiled, trying to brush away Seungmin's concerned but it only made it worse.
"Yeah, not to fund their snacks," his eyes only widened in response.
"They need it," Y/N's voice became higher pitched, as she was desperate for Seungmin to believe her and just leave alone the subject. She didn't want to be in any sort of argument with him but he also didn't want him to be thinking badly of her friends.
"So do you, please be careful around them," Seungmin sighed and patted her shoulder, seeing she wanted to leave the subject alone, as they both left the company.
Later that night at the dorms, Y/N and Seungmin were relaxing on the sofa, with the other members too, as they scrolled through their phones. Looking at her social media, Y/N tapped on her friend's story, only to see they were all hanging out without her, and seemed to be eating at a slightly more expensive fast food restaurant. But they didn't even have enough money for a snack earlier?!
It seemed Y/N had spoke this last thought out loud. Seungmin peered over her shoulder and frowned, recognising the people in the photos as his younger member's friends.
Stopping himself from telling her 'I told you so', Seungmin offered his comfort.
"You've got us, yeah? Don't worry about them anymore," Seungmin swiped off of the story and took her phone out of her hands.
"I don't know what i did wrong..." Y/N bit her lip, wondering how she always went wrong with her friends.
"You did nothing wrong, they took advantage of your kindness, Y/N, now let me order some fried chicken for us, yeah?"
•••
The final member Chan added to the lineup was a guy called Minho, who, very impressively, had completed the basic JYP dance moves in 2 weeks. Y/N was in awe of him.
"I can't believe you completed the moves already! I bet Chan will make you dance leader when we all get to debut together!" Y/N smiled at Lee Know, singing his praises.
"Aha, thank you," Lee Know awkwardly bowed at her, not really saying much after. Y/N just wanted to compliment him and show her appreciation, but seeing his short responses made her feel awkward too, and soon they'd be left in silence.
Y/N found herself sat there thinking, she spent so long trying to get everyone to like her, but maybe what she said, what she did, wasn't good enough?
"Is this too much for you?" Chan sat down next to Y/N, who had isolated herself to sit in the corner of the practice room.
"No it's fine," Y/N waved her hand away, running a hand through her hair.
"Tell me the truth," Chan insisted, shifting his body to look at her, feeling concerned.
"I am, I'm fine," Y/N bluntly said, not wanting to talk about how she truly was feeling, and the thoughts she was having.
"Don't lie to me, I need to know you can do this, I don't want you stressing out, we've got the showcase ahead of us, Y/N," Chan urged her to tell the truth, resting a hand on her knee, patting it gently.
"Look, ok, it is a lot to deal with but I can do it, I promise you. I just, I'm trying to figure everything in my head," Y/N leant her head back against the wall, closing her eyes.
"Thank you for telling me the truth, and, Y/N, that's why we're here, we don't want you feeling like you're on your own when you do so much for all of us, ok?" Chan side hugged her, warmth in his eyes, and some relief there when he finally broke through to her.
"I am? I mean, I do a lot for you guys?" Y/N's voice pleaded for the truth, looking at Chan with hope in her eyes.
"You always do," he smiled and ruffled her hair.
••••••
Back to One Kids Room, Y/N smiled as she thought about how she had come as a person.
"As much as I still look up to my members, my self-esteem has grown so much and I've learnt to value myself. I love them so much, but I need to give myself energy and time too," Y/N smiled at the camera, hands squeezing the long arms of her sleeves and balling them up.
"She's so much more confident now, I remember she used to ask me if this was fine or that but now she's more confident," Changbin commented, the other guys nodding in agreement.
"She used to come to me being like, woahhhhh you're such a good dancer!" Lee Know chucked, thinking of the younger version of Y/N, who would always praise her members.
"Ah yes she'd speak exactly like that! Wow... And she'd look at me like, with these wide eyes being like, I wanna rap like you!" Han laughed as he perfectly imitated how Y/N spoke to him.
"She used to have this really sweet habit, when I didn't know Korean very well, umm, she'd leave these little notes for me, and write the Korean and English translation for me just so I knew what she was saying. There'd always be these words of encouragement, it just made my heart feel warm," Felix told the members, who all 'ooh'ed in response, shocked at this fact because they didn't know that Y/N used to do that.
"Ah, yes, I did used to leave notes for Felix... I wanted to be his friend so badly! He just seemed so cool but whenever I spoke to him he just sort of awkwardly smiled and nodded. I thought he didn't like me, turns out he had no idea what I was saying, so I left notes for him instead... yeah," Y/N felt shy when she admitted this, covering her face.
"I remember back in trainee days, I was late for practice because I overslept. And then when I arrived I thought Channie hyung is really going to scold me but Y/N suddenly appeared, I think she came back from the bathroom or something but she said it was her fault that we were both late, and I thought phew, hyung won't be angry at me now, haha," Jeongin told his own story, remembering Y/N covering for him, and that wasn't the only time she had done that.
"I remember that! I knew she was covering up for you!" Chan gasped, pointing an accusing finger at Jeongin who laughed in response.
"She's so sweet and kind, whenever any of us would argue she'd try and stop it from happening," Hyunjin shook his head in wonder at how selfless Y/N was.
"Oh yeah! She'd try and get us to see from each perspective, even though I felt like I was right I thought wow I can't argue because now Y/N would be sad too if we carried on," Han covered his mouth slightly as he laughed, patting Hyunjin on the shoulder knowing that the argument he was referring to was definitely between the two of them.
"Right! Right! She's really good at seeing other people's feelings, but she used to struggle when it came to herself... She'd look so confused if I said to her that she was acting sad, she looked like a lost puppy..." Changbin said in a more serious tone.
"Oh when she had those puppy eyes! Yeah!" Chan nodded along enthusiastically, knowing the look all too well.
"It made my heart ache, she didn't understand, she's much better now though, I'll get a knock at my door and we'll talk for hours," Changbin confessed, feeling happy he was needed in helping his member feel better.
"Ah yes I talk to Binnie a lot about my feelings these days... I still find it confusing to understand how I feel but it makes a bit more sense when I talk with him, yeah..." Y/N began, still a bit shy in admitting when she needed help but better than she would have been before, "I don't think I look like a puppy? Seungmin is more like a puppy, haha."
"Remember Y/N used to have that part time job?" Seungmin asked the rest of the guys.
"Really?" Felix was shocked, not realising everything Y/N had to balance.
"Yeah she used to work at a cafe whilst training and school, I really admired that," Hyunjin grinned, proud of the younger girl.
"But she'd still have to ask us for money," Chan laughed.
"She'd spend it on her old friends! She wanted to make sure they were ok and then suddenly she wouldn't have any money left!" Seungmin said in disbelief, his voice cutely rising up and down in pitch showing how he was feeling.
"Oh, that makes sense I remember one time we got some boba, and she asked me like oppa, can you get me that please? And I asked her where her money went and she said she spent it on a present for Innie... I think it was near his birthday at the time," Lee Know commented, leaning back against the sofa.
"Woahh, my heart," Hyunjin gasped, placing a hand over his chest, "that's so cute!"
"Ah I love giving gifts! I feel like if I can find someone the perfect gift and they are happy then I'm really happy too," Y/N explained after a staff member asked her the question.
"I think I'm definitely different from debut days... If I could say anything about myself now... It would be... You have grown. Y/N has changed, but in a good way!"
"One Kid's Room, Y/N, finished!"
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
tagged: @skz-streamer @kiraisastay @hannahhbahng @kpopmenace143 @sakufilms @kai-lee08 @arloo00 @dunno-wut-to-do @splat00z @cheesemonky @his-angell @turtledove824 @2minstan @royal-shinigami @yangbbokari
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roanofarcc · 7 months ago
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IN YOUR ORBIT
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pairing. javi x fem!reader
summary. a quiet moment between chasing storms makes you feel like you’re in college again, with your two best friends. you realize just how far you've all come since tragedy plagued your lives five years prior.
warnings. pregnant reader, mentions of past trauma, fluff! 
word count. 1k || masterlist
a/n. some love for javi <3
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Life moved on in strange ways. Five years ago, after the death of three of your best friends, you weren’t sure how life was supposed to look. You wandered around in a haze for a while after the accident, pulling apart from Kate as she hung up her storm-chasing hat and moved to New York. You had tried to pull away from Javi, but he was too stubborn. Even when he joined the military, it seemed like both of your worlds revolved around each other; you fell back into the other’s orbit every time. 
Five years didn’t seem like much time, but everything for you changed. The loss of your friends remained a carved-out spot in your heart, but time did its best to give something back to you, something good to help ease the hurt. That was Javi. 
Before the accident, you and him were close friends. Abby used to call you two halves of the same brain because of how in sync you were. It wasn’t until afterward, when the harsh realities of life forced you to realize how precious each moment was, that you and Javi became more than friends. Three years later you married him in a little courthouse in your hometown, sweet and simple. And by a wonderful surprise, five years later you were expecting your first child. 
The two of you were ecstatic, still flushed with the new excitement of the news, and yet to get into the plethora of worries that awaited. You had one more tornado season before you had to decide exactly what your future in your field looked like with a child. 
Javi had called in Kate to help with the series of chases his company’s team needed. You didn’t work for them, but you helped out where you could, offering your expertise but never venturing too close to the storm; you had forgone that after the accident, and it took a long time for you to be okay with Javi putting himself at risk again, but you couldn’t stop him from doing what he loved. 
“It’s just so exciting,” Kate said, lounging on the motel bed with a bright smile on her face. “You’re gonna have a little baby! Let’s hope it takes after you and not Javi,” she teased. 
“His brain with my looks, they’d be set for life,” you said, only somewhat joking. 
She looked at you with slightly glossy eyes, a little more emotional than you had expected. “I’m really happy for you guys.” Since you could remember, since you had befriended Kate in college, she had been convinced Javi liked you. At every turn, she was the one nudging you towards each other, but you had brushed it off, thinking there wasn’t a chance for you two. But so much had changed, and amidst all of the bad, Javi was your silver lining. 
A knock sounded on the motel’s door before it was swung open by Javi who balanced a pizza box on his hand. “Who’s hungry?” he said. Before he was fully in the door, Kate had jumped up and snatched the box, bringing it back over to the bed. 
You couldn’t help but feel giddy mixed with a sharp pang of sadness. It felt like college again, sharing pizza in a cramped room with your best friends. Only there were three missing. An incompleteness haunted the scene, but you were grateful for what you had left, and for the future that looked so much brighter than it had a couple of years ago. 
“What about baby names? Have you thought of any yet?” Kate asked before biting into the still-warm pizza. 
“Not yet, but Javi has some terrible contenders.” 
Your husband scoffed, faking hurt by placing a hand on his heart. “You said you wanted to be creative!” 
You laughed as he took a seat beside you on the bed. “We’re still figuring, well, everything out.” 
“Well, if you’re in the market for middle names, I think my name should be tossed into the ring,” Kate said. “I like to think I’m the reason you ended up together.” 
Javi threw a wadded-up napkin at her. She swatted it away with a huff. “No way is that true!” 
Kate scoffed. “Is too!” She turned to you. “You have no idea how many times I had to sit and listen to him. ‘She’s so pretty.’ ‘She’s so perfect.’ ‘Oh, I’m too scared to ask her out.’ ‘Blah, blah, blah.’” 
You turned to him, surprised. Back in college, you had thought about the idea of you and Javi a couple of times, mostly because Kate was sure you’d be a good fit. But you didn't know he had been pining after you for that long before he confessed his feelings. “You really said all that about me?” 
He shrugged. “It was a lot more chill than Kate’s making it sound, but…yeah. What? You think I asked you out, out of the blue?” 
“I don’t know.” You had been so caught up in your research in school that relationships fell to the back burner. Not that it mattered anymore; you two had found your way to each other regardless, but he somehow became even more endearing in your eyes.
“Oh, that wasn't even half of it, but I don’t want to embarrass him even more,” Kate said. 
Javi’s eyes narrowed slightly. “You want to talk crushes? What’s going on between you and that cowboy?” 
Kate’s eyes widened. “What? Nothing? Are you kidding me?” 
“He seems to be awfully interested in you,” you added, shifting the teasing onto her. Relationships still seemed to be on the back burner for her those days. You couldn’t imagine how hard it was for her to not only lose her best friends but someone she loved too. The ‘tornado wrangler’ that Javi’s team seemed to be in slight competition with during their recent chases had taken quite the interest in Kate and maybe that wasn’t the worst thing. 
Stealing two more slices of pizza, Kate rolled off of the bed. “He is not, and I have zero interest in him.” With a huff, she made her way toward the door. “See you guys in the morning.” 
“Are you gonna pay me back for the pizza or-” Kate closed the door quickly, cutting off Javi’s words. He threw his hands up as you laughed. “Now it really feels like college again.” 
In the warm glow of the bedside lamp, you looked at him with a soft smile. There was so much you still had to figure out, but even in the chaotic world of chasing down storms, your life finally felt peaceful and on the right track despite the universe trying to shake you off. 
“You know,” you started, placing a hand over the small bump of your stomach. “Kate’s a bad middle name.” 
Javi lowered himself down the bed so that his face was in line with your stomach. “I need you to be a boy, just to spite your auntie Kate, all right,” he said to your baby. “That’ll show her not to pay me back for pizza.” 
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brawberryz · 7 days ago
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Please don't leave me alone
Batfam Yan! × Eva Pilot! Reader
Note:English is not my first language, sorry if there is any translation error
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You were a normal student
Or well almost nothing was normal in this world, but in your life it was pretty normal
You were a first year student, you weren't very sociable but it's not like you didn't have friends either. You were the middle point of being someone extroverted and introverted
But that's not the main issue, a few days ago you had received a letter from your father, father...
Years ago you hadn't heard from him, well when you were younger you remembered him but since the incident you haven't seen him anymore
Since then you have been living with your teacher, he was a good guy and he was a good father figure for your depressed self
You didn't imagine that after so much time your father would want to talk to you although you didn't complain
You were in front of a telephone booth, you were trying to contact the boy in the photo which your father had sent to look for you
Richard "Dick" Grayson
But your attempts failed, all the telephone lines were cut so it was impossible to have some kind of contact, apparently it was because of the attack of something, you didn't know very well what but the streets were empty so it must be something serious and dangerous
"Ugh, I shouldn't be here..."
You said as you left the phone and picked up your bag, you were still in your school uniform, they hadn't even given you time to change, now you were here in the middle of an abandoned city with no signal
"I guess it won't make it in time, I should go to some shelter"
You said letting out a long sigh, you knew it wasn't a good idea to listen and come to this place, but your desire to be able to see your father after so long won but you were slowly regretting that
You put your bag on your shoulder and began to walk through the abandoned streets trying to find some kind of shelter to protect yourself
But before you could do anything a loud explosion was heard near you made the whole city shake like some kind of earthquake or schism, that explosion could have easily damaged your eardrums and made them bleed
"What's going on..."
You said scared looking up right where like some "airplanes?" Strangers came out of a place
And there you saw it... a giant thing maybe bigger than a 30-story building, it was too scary you had never seen anything like that before, your body was in shock and you weren't able to move
You tried with all your might to make your body react in some way but it was impossible, it was as if your feet were stuck to the ground
Some large missiles passed close to you and you instinctively crouched down protecting your head, whatever that thing was was too dangerous
You saw how those missiles barely did any damage to that creature, what kind of strange monster was that creature, the only thing you could do was watch in a daze as the fight developed
The creature threw something from its hands causing one of the planes to fall and to your bad luck it fell right next to you, you could barely react when the plane fell in front of you, you were lucky not to be crushed
But it seems luck was not on your side today (if it ever was) You were lucky) there was another explosion and the creature staggered towards you causing its foot to step on the plane causing a huge explosion, you fell to the ground and tried to cover yourself with your arms accepting your end
But you didn't feel anything, you heard the sound of a car braking hard in front of you and the door opening, you looked up and saw it
"Come in, sorry for being late"
The boy said giving you a sad smile, you could barely process everything that was happening it was too much for your poor teenage brain
"What are you waiting for? Come in now!"
The boy spoke again, it felt more like an order than a request, you quickly came out of your state of shock and quickly climbed into the passenger seat, buckling your seat belt tightly.
"Hold on tight, this is going to be a bit of a dangerous ride."
Before you could respond, Richard accelerated the car as fast as he could before the car was run over by the creature.
He drove as fast as the car would allow him until he reached a more remote place, you felt like you were about to die from the car flipping so much.
After a few minutes, Richard stopped on a small hill in the distance, he let out a sigh of relief and then turned his gaze to you.
"Sorry about that, I know it was too much to process but- wait a minute."
Richard stopped talking in the middle of his sentence as soon as he saw something in the window, he quickly took out a pair of binoculars from a small drawer in the car.
He quickly moved closer to the car window to see more clearly.
"Wait a minute, are they going to use the N-2 mine!?"
Richard said in surprise before grabbing your arm and pulling you against him to use his body as a shield.
"Bend down and hold on to me!"
You barely had time to react when a huge explosion was heard making everything nearby shake, with so many explosions you heard today you swore you were about to go deaf
A strong gust hit the car causing it to fall and spin around on the ground, you felt Richard hug you tighter, he wasn't going to allow you to get hurt in any way and if that meant he had to be some kind of human shield he was going to be
After a few minutes things calmed down and they were able to get out of the car unharmed
"Hey little one, are you okay?"
Richard asked worriedly looking at you on the ground trying to calm your labored breathing
"Yes...yes I'm fine"
You gave him a half smile, so many things had happened in less than 1 hour and your head was only full of doubts and more doubts
You just wanted to go home and have that monotonous life
"Okay, now help push the car"
You just nodded getting up from the ground and shaking off your uniform, you helped him push the car with all your strength
It was difficult the car was too heavy but after a few minutes they were able to do it
"Thanks for the help, (name)"
He gave you a grateful smile, he gave you a small pat on the head
"Don't worry, I should be the one who should thank you, thanks grayson"
You said shyly, in a way you were grateful that he had risked his life to protect you
"Just call me Richard, there's no need to be so formal"
You just nodded and then got into the car with him. It was going to be a long trip, but you felt a little safe with him. It was like having an older brother.
_
"This place is so big!"
You said in amazement walking through the large facilities, you had never been in a place like this
NORV was an amazing place, you couldn't believe that you were going to have something to do with this place
"Too big I would say.."
Richard said as he looked at a map of the place, he hadn't remembered that the place would be so confusing and giant
The two of you were going down an escalator, you were too focused on reading the manual that Richard had given you to pay attention to your surroundings
"I wonder where Barbara is..." he said in a small whisper "I'm sorry, I don't know the place that well"
The boy said embarrassed, you just nodded without paying much attention to what he was saying
You were walking for a few minutes until you reached a hallway
"I think it should be here, follow me"
He said grabbing your arm, you weren't going to tell him out loud but it bothers you a little that you touched you so freely, you felt that he had gained too much confidence in such a short time and that made you uncomfortable, he barely gave you your personal space and treated you as if he had known you all your life
You just made a small sound of acceptance and then continued walking, you got into a small elevator and you were there for a few seconds
Just when the elevator opened a red-haired woman appeared with a serious expression looking at Richard
"Ah!, hello Barbara, how long?"
Richard said greeting her with a smile, you just kept your eyes on the book pretending not to pay attention
The girl just nodded and got into the elevator with you
"I could say the same..."
She said in a monotone as she leaned against the wall of the elevator, Richard let out an awkward laugh as he adjusted his uniform
You just pretended not to feel the awkward atmosphere that the two of them radiated together
"Is this the girl Bruce was talking about?"
Barbara pointed at you, you just shrank further into your book
"Yes, the institute reported to us that she is the third kid chosen"
Mmm, I see, well it's nice to meet you"
He gave you a small smile as he gave your shoulders a small squeeze
"Likewise"
You nodded nervously, you returned your attention to the book at this moment you felt that your only safe place was this manual on the NORV facilities
"You and your father look so alike, it seems that neither of you are able to smile or show your emotions"
Richard let out a small laugh as he said that, Barbara simply nodded at Richard's poorly made joke
They continued to go up in the elevator, they began to talk about something that you didn't really understand nor did you care
They exited the elevator and arrived at a hallway, just as the three of them arrived and entered the door slammed
"I-it's really dark!"
You said confused, it's not that you were afraid of the dark you were just afraid of not seeing your way and tripping over something
But before anyone could answer the light went out Suddenly it turned on
And there it was, it was the biggest robot you had ever seen in your life, you could only see its head but it still looked big, it was buried in a bright pink liquid you wanted to ask what it was but you decided not to say anything
You decided to flip through the book to see if you could find any information about this giant robot
"You won't find any information there"
Barbara said staring at you
"Uh..."
You looked at her confused as you listened to what she was saying
"This is the latest combat weapons system created by humans, an artificial life form called...evangelion or in a few words unit 01"
You just nodded at all the information you received, you barely understood what she was telling you, this was too much to understand for a teenager like you
"Is this what my father does?"
You asked curiously staring at Barbara
"You got closer, congratulations, (name)"
You heard A voice, one you recognized all too well, you looked up and there he was
Watching you from a window above, it seemed as if nothing had changed he still had that cold and disinterested look he always gave you when you were younger
"D-dad..."
You said in shock, so much time had passed that you didn't even know how to start a conversation with him, what should you tell the man who left you for more than 10 years
"Activate the Eva"
Bruce said bluntly as he stared at you
"Activate the Eva!? But unit 01 is still in preliminary phase, did they lose their minds?"
Richard couldn't believe what Bruce was asking, it was too dangerous for you to get on that Eva, you could easily die or get hurt
The mere thought of you being hurt made Richard's stomach turn, he wasn't going to allow another innocent child to get hurt to fulfill Bruce's whims
"We have no choice, Richard"
Barbara said dryly
"But Damian is too hurt to be able to be a pilot and (Name) doesn't even know how to fly one!"
Richard tried to get Barbara or Bruce to see reason but his attempts were only ignored
"Well today he will learn, are you ready (name)?"
Barbara turned her gaze to you, you swallowed hard you felt too scared and confused were you supposed to get into that thing!?
"What...really?"
You said confused
"Yes..."
No There was time, all the pilots they had were too injured to be able to handle any Eva, (name) was the last salvation
The angel was approaching and causing destruction in its path, it was now or never, the fate of the world right now weighed on your shoulders
"But it took Damian more than 6 months to synchronize with the Eva! She barely arrived and if it's too dangerous and she won't stand it, have you thought about that!?"
Richard got defensive again trying to get Barbara to see reason
" (name) just needs to get into the capsule and everything will be fine" Barbara said "But-" Before Richard could speak again Barbara interrupted him "defending humanity from the angels is our highest priority, we need someone to be able to synchronize with the Eva even if the chances are almost zero"
Richard just stayed quiet, he knew she was right but he didn't want to admit it, he hated the way he felt his heart tighten every time he thought about the possibility of you getting hurt or worse yet dead
"Fine, but if something happens to (name), you'll regret it"
Richard spoke in a somber tone looking at Barbara, the woman just looked at him for a few seconds before just nodding
"Okay, (name) get ready you'll get on the Eva"
You just nodded, you didn't know what was about to happen but you didn't like it
_
You had woken up in a hospital bed, your whole body hurt, you felt like you had a bandage on your left eye
You barely had time to react when the door opened abruptly, there was Richard
He had a worried look on his face, before you could say anything he launched himself at you giving you a big hug
"(Name)! Thank god you'are okay I thought you were going to die..."
He said hugging you tighter, you didn't know what he meant by that you could barely remember what had happened but you thought that finally you were going to be able to be calm
But how wrong you were
The days passed faster than you would like, you were accepted to be an Eva pilot
It seems that in your fight with the angel the Eva went into an aggressive mode and controlled itself while you were in a state of shock
During your short time being an Eva pilot you learned to control it better But you still hated handling it
You managed to meet other Eva pilots called Tim and Damian
Tim was very talkative not as much as Richard but he still talked a lot, you made a small friendship with him
With Damian it didn't go so well, he was too quiet it seemed as if he had no emotions, you simply decided to leave him since you thought he didn't like you
Days passed and you met more people like Jason, stehp, Cass and Duke
Some were retired pilots and others who helped repair the Evas like Jason and Stehp
For the first time you felt important as if you really mattered
Too bad that happiness ends little by little
Every day that passed you felt like each one of them became more possessive and weird
Every time you met someone other than them that person disappeared out of nowhere
Every time you came back from a fight with an angel and was too hurt Richard treated you like a fucking baby
And you hated him too much, you were old enough to be able to take care of such superficial wounds
They didn't even let you be with other people other than them, they even fought to see who would sit with you at lunch, in those cases you simply went to your room to lock yourself in and eat
But you didn't even feel safe there, the last time you checked your room to clean it you found a hidden camera among your things, and there was only one person who would be able to do that
Bruce, that son of a bitch you swore that if you saw him again you would kill him
But you knew very well that you would never You were going to be able to do it
You had no one, Bruce was the only family you had left out there you were no one, not even your mother her death was still engraved in your head, you still had nightmares about it
The only thing you could do was ignore all of that and pretend it didn't affect you
You felt like you were tangled in a spider web and every time you moved you only got more tangled
Maybe you should just stop moving and hope that maybe at some point those spider webs would loosen and you could get out
But you knew it wasn't true
You were trapped just like an insect, being the spider's prey and you would stay trapped there until your body is completely rotted
Dying there without being able to be free again
What's the point of living if you're not even able to enjoy life
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If you see any similarity with Evangelion chapter 1, it is literally lol
So far I think this is the longest one shot I wrote
I hope the person who asked me for this enjoys it, I'm really happy with the result
Maybe I'll do other one shots about this Evangelion AU 🔥
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mind-intheclouds342 · 3 months ago
Text
A new ladder - Reader x Curly
Previous - Part 2 - Next
"Those were the words of the former captain of the Tulpar ship, owned by Pony Express, Grant Curly, who miraculously was the only survivor even in his condition after going through a series of murders on the ship, completely vulnerable, by the same person who caused the crash, his co-pilot Jimmy-"
You turned off the television while they were broadcasting Curly's testimony on all channels.
"I'll go buy a few things" you mentioned, getting up from your seat and putting on a jacket to go out. "Wanna come with me?"
Curly turned to look at you curiously, thinking you were going to leave him there on his own until you returned, or that you would take him without asking to keep him close.
Curly: "Please"
He sighed and you took his chair to start pushing him to the store.
They could notice the looks of the people passing by, all recognizing the man, but none able to approach him to ask a question.
"Do you like peas? Lin told me that you could eat without any problem as long as your pieces are small." 
Curly: "I have no problem with the food... I just don't like sweets."
"Okay"
You nodded, adding things to the cart, checking the prices, and thinking about what you could cook.
He stood gazing into the distance at the chocolate aisle, remembering the boxes of chocolates he used to buy for Linda, sighing at the thought that those days were in the past.
He found it strange to think that she was already over 50, while he remained at the age of 34, now being cared for by the younger sister of the woman who had once been his fiancée, who must now be around 32.
Curly: "Your birthday... It was a few months ago, right? I remember Linda used to say that she liked spring because it was when you were born."
"...No, my birthday hasn't happened yet, there's still some time left. But I don't really celebrate it, I just treat myself and that's it."
You shrugged even while looking at the products on the shelves.
Having everything you needed, you went to the cash registers to pay. The woman had seen Curly on television and gave him a discount as if he were some kind of veteran or senior.
That didn't please the man very much.
You stopped halfway back to his home, the streets were no longer so busy, after all, you had left a bit late after all.
"Would you like to feel something different?"
You asked him while firmly holding the wheelchair, there was a slight slope on that street, the man immediately turned to look at you, you looked excited to do something, like a child about to pull a prank.
Curly: "Sure?..." he said without being very convinced
And he let out a scream when you climbed onto the chair's wheel tubes and let the slope of the street make you go down, he could only hear a mix of his screams and your laughter as you went down.
He feared crashing into something or flying off, he didn't want to experience more pain, but the chair kept moving even after the descent was over. Curly was grateful for the good quality of the chair, and that it didn't fall apart when you got on it too. He was able to breathe easy when they stopped after a few seconds.
"And we arrived! Much faster, right?"
You patted his shoulder, ready to get off and push him inside the house, the man could feel the rapid beating of his heart at that moment.
Curly: "Do you do things like this often?" he asked, trying to have a conversation to calm down.
"Didn't you feel more alive?"
He fell silent as he thought about your question, while they descended, the only thing he could feel was his heart racing, the wind on his face, and he heard your laughter close to him, but at no moment was there sadness, remorse, or any of those emotions he constantly felt.
Just adrenaline.
Curly: "You could say that... yes..."
You put the groceries in their place and left out only what you were going to use, you ended up making some fried rice with chicken, egg, onion, and peas.
You could see how the man struggled to use his prosthesis to hold his utensils and eat, everything falling onto the table several times.
You moved your chair closer to him, making him look at you.
"Do you want to keep trying or would you prefer that I help you?"
Curly: "I give up for today..." was his only response, sighing.
You took food on your fork and brought it to his face, he opened his mouth and finally managed to take a bite, enjoying the taste of that simple food, he had missed homemade meals after so much time eating the provisions on the ship and then the bland hospital food.
"And? How is it?"
Curly: "Delicious," he replied, opening his mouth, hoping you would give him more.
You couldn't help but compare it to a baby bird begging for food, but you held back your laughter to keep feeding it.
Curly: "Mm.. So, when is your birthday?"
It was a very bad idea to talk to his implant while eating, causing him to start coughing as he choked on the food. 
"Well... It's exactly in 5 weeks," you smiled, making him raise his arms and you patted his back.
He was surprised at how quickly he was able to stop coughing when you did that, you immediately handed him a glass of water.
"I'll be right back, I'm going to get a cloth to clean the food scraps off the table."
You mentioned standing up to go to the kitchen.
While you were away, he kept trying to eat on his own, managing to get a small amount of rice on his fork and being able to eat that.
While he chewed, he kept watching out the window; that orange and reddish color appearing in the trees was tinting the whole place.
Her birthday... It's in autumn...
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