#I regret everything I said to him but I’m aware that I can’t take any of that back

[rainy-dayzzzz]

Guys what if I got back into yttd again

[lovecoatedwords]

Bad nights (part three)

A/N: hey everyone!! So glad everyone like bad nights!! I am currently writing another poly marauders! So if stay tuned!! Thank you for reading!!

Summary: Remus got clingy cuz of the full moon, James lost a match, Sirius has problems with his parents and you aren’t well. How Will this situation turn out?

Read bad nights part two, here.

You had just stepped away, too overwhelmed by the emotions in the room to stay, but now, standing just outside the door, you could feel the weight of the tension that hung between you all. The words you’d said, the way you’d walked away, still echoed in the back of your mind. You never meant to make them feel guilty. You just couldn’t hold it all together anymore, and maybe, just maybe, they needed to see it.

Taking a deep breath, you turned back to the door and opened it slowly, unsure of what you'd find inside.

The kitchen was where you found them, all three of them sitting at the table, heads bowed, shoulders tense. Remus was standing by the window, looking out into the quiet street below. The calm, ever-stable presence he usually had was fractured today, his shoulders slumped under the weight of exhaustion. He hadn’t yet fully recovered from the full moon, and the way his hand fidgeted with the hem of his shirt revealed just how raw he felt.

James was hunched forward at the table, his elbows resting heavily on the surface, fingers running through his messy hair in frustration. His eyes were shadowed, and you could tell that he had been carrying his own burden. Sirius, too, was sitting beside him, his arms crossed tightly across his chest, staring out the window with a quiet intensity that spoke of more than just frustration. There was something deeper there. A hurt he hadn’t been able to voice until now.

The moment you stepped inside, you felt the thick raw tension. They turned to face you, their expressions unreadable at first, but there was a heaviness in the air that made it impossible for any of you to hide what you had been feeling.

It was James who spoke first, his voice rough and hesitant. "I'm sorry. I… I know I’ve been too caught up in my own head, and I haven’t seen how much you’ve been carrying, too." He ran a hand through his hair again, his gaze never quite meeting yours. "I shouldn’t have dumped all that on you earlier. I… I can’t keep pretending like everything’s fine. Not when it’s clear it isn’t."

Sirius shifted in his seat, his dark eyes meeting James's for a fleeting moment before he spoke, his voice tinged with regret. "James is right. I’ve been selfish too. I’ve been so wrapped up in my own anger and frustration that I didn’t stop to think about what you’re dealing with." His jaw clenched briefly before he looked at you, . I’m sorry for taking it all out on you. You’ve been carrying everyone’s burdens,including mine, and I never stopped to ask how you were holding up."

Remus, standing by the window, turned then, his eyes filled with concern. "I should have noticed, too. I’ve been clinging to you for comfort after the full moon, and I never stopped to think about how much I was asking of you. You’ve always been the one holding us together, and I should’ve been more aware of how that was affecting you." His voice was soft, his words gentle but heavy. "I’m sorry for adding to the pressure."

You stood there in the doorway, your heart heavy with everything they were saying, everything they were admitting. They were apologizing, but it didn’t feel like they were apologizing just for the moments when they had snapped at you. They were apologizing for not seeing you at all, for not realizing that you, too, needed support.

You closed your eyes, a wave of exhaustion crashing over you. "I’m sorry too," you said, the words quiet but genuine. You stepped closer to them, your eyes flicking from one to the other. "I shouldn’t have let it all build up. I should’ve said something sooner. I should’ve told you I was struggling, that I couldn’t keep being the one to fix everything."

"No," Remus said quickly, his voice thick with emotion. He stepped closer, his hand reaching out to gently take yours,. "You’ve always been there for us, and we’ve been blind to how much it’s been costing you. We’re sorry, all of us." He squeezed your hand. "You don’t have to do it alone."

Sirius, looking more vulnerable than you’d ever seen him, leaned forward. His voice was low, raw with regret. "You’ve always carried us, and we’ve never stopped to ask how you’re doing. We’ve been selfish. I’ve been selfish." He stood up, his eyes searching yours, as though he were pleading for your forgiveness. "Please, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just… I didn’t know what to do with all this." He let out a long breath, and then, as if unsure of what else to say, he moved closer to you.

James stood up as well, and without another word, he reached for you, his hand finding yours. "I don’t want you to carry everything. I don’t want you to feel like you have to keep it all together when you’re the one who needs support. You don’t have to do this alone anymore."

The distance between you, began to close. Remus had always been the calm one, but even he had his breaking point. Sirius had always been the one with the sharp words, but today he was raw, vulnerable. James, too, had his own walls up, but now, he was standing before you, trying to tear them down.

Your gaze flicked between them. They were apologizing,, but there was something else there, something deeper. And before you could say anything, James took a step closer to Sirius, his hand finding the back of his neck, pulling him in. The kiss they shared was slow, unhurried, but full of meaning

When they pulled back, Sirius looked at James with his red rimmed eyes. “I am sorry. I never meant to say all theses things, I was just too pent up and-and, I was selfish towards you too.” he said quietly, his voice still thick with emotion.

James smiled faintly, his thumb brushing over Sirius’s lips. "No Siri, its not only your fault, i should have been more understanding. I am sorry and I love you darling." James said everything in one breath making Remus chuckle.

Sirius turned to Remus and without saying anything instantly wrapped his arms around him, pleading him, apologising him.

You saw Remus relax completely in his embrace when you felt a hand on your shoulder. James, looked at you and brought you closer to himself, kissing your forehead.

Sirius turned to you then, his eyes full of remorse but also something else—something softer. "We’re sorry, love. We’ve been asking too much of you, and that’s not fair." His voice was barely above a whisper, but it carried everything that needed to be said.

You nodded, a small tear slipping down your cheek. "I’m sorry too. I should’ve let you in sooner. I was afraid of being too much. But I’ve never wanted to be anything but there for all of you."

Remus moved to you then, pulling you into his arms. "You’re never too much, love," he said softly, his lips brushing against your temple. "And we’re going to be better. For you. For all of us."

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requests open!!

[dimplyowl]

😩 one of the main things I see about Izzy and why he’s an innocent little lamb who has done nothing wrong is that he’s got a lot of internalized homophobia going on, as well as issues with toxic masculinity. And yeah, OFMD is all about taking those toxic societal expectations and telling them to shove themselves up their asses. And I think having a character who has those internalized feelings and who holds onto them until being proven that they’re wrong is an interesting character arc. Growth is a great thing! We love to see it!

The problem comes when people use those characteristics as excuses for any of izzys bad behaviors, as if they give him a free pass to do whatever he wants to do. But that’s not how these things work. The problem I have with Izzy’s character arc in s2 is that he doesn’t do anything to make reparations until his deathbed apology to Ed. He just kind of…continues to be there, ignoring Ed, letting the crew extend kindness to him and still not really engaging until Calypso’s Birthday.

You know who has done some really shitty things and does actually work toward making reparations? Ed. And that’s another thing I see a lot of Izzy fans say: that gb people give Ed a free pass for everything he did because of his childhood and his trauma and his self hatred and broken heart. But babes, when we talk about these issues, you’re misunderstanding why we’re talking about them. I obviously can’t speak for all Ed fans, but the majority of us aren’t listing these issues as excuses, we’re naming them as reasons for his behavior. So we can understand why he feels the way he feels and did the things he did.

I am fully aware that he did some really shitty things to people who care about him and who he cares about. I acknowledge that. I also know why he did them. And knowing why doesn’t make it okay. It helps me understand him more, and to know that he wasn’t doing them because he enjoyed them and, most importantly, that they’re things he regrets doing. That’s obvious throughout the entirety of eps4-6, in his hesitance to return to the ship, in agreeing to wear a burlap sack and allowing Lucius to push him over the ship, in taking time to actually listen to fang about his own experiences during the kraken era. It’s part of the entire reason they have a party, it’s part of turning poison into positivity. Ed doesn’t have great apology skills. His “apology” speech was definitely lacking as far as our modern standards are concerned. That’s fine. Those aren’t natural skills to have, they’re learned, and he never really had the opportunity to learn them. But you can see that he wants to, and he’s trying and he’s learning, and that’s the most important thing.

Izzy doesn’t do that shit. In season 1 he uses his position of power to bully the crew, to go against Ed’s orders (his captains orders; that’s essentially mutiny right there); he loses and turns his captain and a ship full of queer and poc to the cops; he then becomes captain and it takes less than a day for the crew to mutiny on him because he’s a fucking asshole and no one wants to work for him; and to top it all off, he tells his boss—his friend, supposedly, his depressed and already established to be suicidal friend—that he would be better off dead than be like he is.

Where are his attempts at reparation? Where does he turn around and say “yeah calling the cops on you was fucking horrible and I shouldn’t have done it” or “I shouldn’t have said those things when you were already struggling” or “I’m sorry for taking advantage of my power and using it to bully and abuse my employees and another captain’s crew.”? He doesn’t do any of that. He doesn’t even try.

Internalized homophobia doesn’t make intimidating your gay subordinate or calling your friend a “namby pamby in a silk dressing gown” okay. Toxic masculinity doesn’t make repeatedly insulting someone for having traditionally feminine traits and interests okay. Doing those kinds of things can never be okay. But recognizing these as faults and actively working to improve yourself and grow and apologize to the people you’ve hurt and try to make things better does make it more likely for the people who care about you to forgive you.

[razorblade180]

Home Sick

[inn room]

Stelle:*walks in* I’m back…

Dan Heng:Find anything entertaining for yourself?

Stelle:I am entertainment.*lays down* What I found was fleeting distraction. Emphasis on fleeting. *hands over face*

Dan Heng:Are…Are you okay? You’re not your typical playful self. Even when you’re doing work.

Stelle:…I hate it here.

Dan Heng:What?

Stelle:I said I hate Amphoreus. *sits up* The conflicts, the betrayals, the senseless death and uncertainty. Not to mention I got a dose of memories about someone I thought I hate! Let’s not forget, all these grand mechanisms and yet nothing to get in contact with the Express! The others probably saw us get shot for all we know! What if-

Dan Heng grabs her by the shoulders, causing her to flinch. She didn’t even notice he had gotten so close, or the obvious look of concern on his face. Stelle looked down at her hands to find them trembling.

Stelle:Hehe…been awhile since I’ve this worn out. *tearing up* I’m loosing my head.

Dan Heng:I’ve never seen you look like this to begin with.

Stelle:That’s what happens when you stay on the train while people start dying in a dream. Caelus and Himeko had to calm me down. Maybe I should’ve followed your example for once and stayed behind? I…I really miss those two right now. Same with March and Welt.

Dan Heng:…I miss them too.

Stelle:I’m sorry you’re stuck here with me of all people. *covers face* Caelus is far better at planning ahead between the two of us. Here I am, leading the charge into battles like always but I can’t begin to make heads or tails of the bigger picture. It’s so exhausting!

Dan Heng:You’re not doing this alone.

Stelle:I’m not doing any of it! That’s the issue! *looks at him* Before we knew it, the two of us bound and headed towards execution as means for someone else’s agenda; my gut knew something was off but in the end we-

Dan Heng: Outwitting Lady Aglea isn’t something either of us were prepared for. Let’s not forget, we are on an unknown planet having to learn everything as things develop. Playing it by ear is all we can do, and we’ve both been doing a pretty good job in my opinion.

Stelle:How can you still be so level headed despite everything?

Dan Heng:You make it easy. Even if I were used to be sociable, I’m nowhere near as captivating and genuine as you are. You and March have that quality in spades. Though between you and I, you’re the bolder one. I doubt she’d roll with the punches as well as you do.

Stelle:Yeah well, that’s what happens when you take most of the fighting requests instead of management. Kinda regretting it though. *wipes tears* Maybe I shouldn’t have put so many management tasks off onto Caelus. It’s so weird; being away from him this long has really worn me out. I wonder if he’s feeling the same?

Dan Heng:Perhaps since the two of you are connected, being apart is having some sort of impact we weren’t aware of.

Stelle:To be honest, I’m just an anxious person at heart. I just also happen to be incredibly funny so nobody notices.

Dan Heng:Funny is…one way to describe your personality.

Stelle:Heh. Dan Heng, I’m really glad you’re here. Although if I’m being real, seeing you freak out would make me feel like I’m not losing my mind. This place is crazy.

Dan Heng:Hehe, well I’m not sure what your definition of “freaking out” would look like, but I’ll admit it, you might find what you’re looking for if I don’t get to sleep under a night sky soon. It’s far too bright here for my liking. *smiles* We’ll get through this and see everyone again.

Stelle:Thanks. I…know you’re not much of hugger, but-

His arms wrap around her without a second thought. Stelle immediately does the same to him, firmly holding onto Dan Heng as a shaky breath leaves her lungs. He might’ve hugged her for as long as she needed to, but Stelle still chose to end the embrace first.

Stelle:I probably look like shit right now, don’t I?

Dan Heng:You look like a Trailblazer charting the course. Get some rest. When you wake up we can eat; maybe find some distraction together until it’s time for the next step.

Stelle:Sounds like a plan. Night, or I guess, see you later. You’re right. Constant daylight sucks.

Dan Heng:Hehe, perhaps it’s stopped you from getting proper rest too? Goodnight, Stelle.

She lays back down, her body feeling a little lighter than before and her eyelids a lot heavier. Dan Heng returns to his favorite spot on the balcony. He can’t help but sigh. Genuine was the right word to describe Stelle. It’s not that he hid his worries better. Far from it. He simply wasn’t as expressive about the sheer chaos unfolding. Still, what he said wasn’t a lie either. He had full confidence in their ability to persevere and reunite with everyone. Whenever that may be.

Dan Heng:I hope all of you are fairing better than we are.

xxxxx

Outside of a sleeping young woman’s frigid room, Caelus sat with his back against the cold metal door as he stared off into the stars towards Amphoreus. At this point, the unknown felt more inviting than the idling he was forced to do. Still, he would wait to lend a hand. It could be for March’s sake, his far off friends, or both. Regardless, he would do his best and wait.

Caelus:Stay strong everyone.

[evnovaa]

Blame Part 2 | Chris Sturniolo

“Where were you at when I needed you?”

Genre : angst

Warnings : swearing

a/n: it’s been months but here it is (ps. new fic snippet coming later🙊)

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·✦·໒꒱ ────── · ·

Chris POV

It’s been hours since Chris has heard from Y/n, he’s panicking. That’s putting it lightly.

He’s dealing with a lot, his girlfriend is ignoring him and he kissed his ex girlfriend, well she kissed him. He’s been telling himself for hours that what happened between him and Lola has nothing to do with him. She came onto him and he was just a victim of his circumstances, he has zero fault in any of this actually.

That’s when he said fuck it and booked an Uber to his girlfriend’s apartment, he couldn’t bare to sit in this regret and guilt, he’ll be able to make things right, she will forgive him and everything will return back to normal right?

“Christopher?” The Uber driver says as he arrives outside their apartment.

“Yeah that’s me” Chris says as he gets into the uber and tries to get as comfortable as his conscience will allow him, all he knows is that he’s fucked.

The drive is long and painful, he is dreading the look on Y/n’s face, he feels himself getting emotional as he thinks about how he just broke almost 3 years of trust, over what? A meaningless kiss?

It was totally meaningless, right, yeah totally pointless, it meant nothing to him, he just keeps finding himself thinking about how Lola looked at him

Flashback

“Chris do you still want to be with me? I can’t tell and I need to know I can’t keep sneaking around to meet you.” Lola says pleading with the boy.

End of flashback

He’s been more than happy with Y/n, Lola meant nothing, she means nothing if he’s lost his everything.

He recognizes the area and anxiety consumes him, he’s usually with Y/n on the way back to her apartment to sit in each others essence for hours on end and in love with each other, but now it’s different

He’s here because, if we are being honest, he cheated, he lied and he was ignorant and selfish.

“Uh, you can stop here thank you.” Chris says to the uber driver stopping outside the apartment building.

Chris is anxious and extremely sad, he’s disappointed in himself and how he even let his relationship with Lola get so personal, yes she was his ex, but that part of him was reserved for the love of his life.

Then it finally hit him like a ton of bricks. Is he still in love with Lola? The way she kissed him felt so natural, a little too natural. He melted into her like they became one, but it’s too shameful of a thought. Chris doesn’t entertain it.

He’s lost in thought but he’s now outside Y/n’s apartment and he hasn’t knocked yet, he hasn’t yet figured out how he’s going to fix all of this. He has to fix it. And he will.

He decides to take his phone out and text her so she knows he’s here

Chris : Baby I’m outside, please open the door.

Chris : I know I’ve been terrible today I just need to see you. Please.

Y/n POV

Y/n has been home for hours, but since she got into her apartment she’s felt hollow. Empty.

She found her way to her couch and crashed, her body was too tired from all the crying and all the screaming she had done to release some of the hurt and pain.

Her phone buzzes and she ignores it. Buzz.

A second notification came in and she decided to get up from her sleep, still gaining her awareness, she takes her phone and reads:

Chris⭐️ : Baby I’m outside, please open the door.

Chris⭐️ : I know I’ve been terrible today I just need to see you. Please.

Her heart dropping to her ass is an understatement, it dropped to the lowest part of hell that not even the devil himself resides in.

She debates herself on what shes opening herself up to, is it worth it? Does it even matter what he has to say? He lied to her and he didn’t have the balls to tell her about what he’s doing, and who he’s doing it with? Did something happen that she doesn’t know of?

Her body goes against everything she’s thinking and she approaches the door and opens it.

She sees the love of her life, he looks exhausted, drained and most of all like he is carrying a load of weight and he’s just waiting to let go of it

What has she gotten herself into by opening the door?

“Baby..” Chris says to Y/n with a sense of guilt and shame in his voice.

He moves towards her, she takes a step back looking at him as if he had the most terrifying entity behind him, but here’s the thing, he’s the terrifying entity.

“We need to talk, and I need you to be honest with me Christopher.” Y/n says as she allows him in and shuts the door closed.

“Listen to me baby I know, I’ve been a dick to you today but I just wanted to make sure you were okay, you sounded…I don’t know, just stressed out on the phone when you called.” he says this to her as if she doesn’t know he met up with Lola behind her back and lied to her face about it

“Yeah, about that, were you with Lola? And I don’t wanna hear shit out your mouth if you finna stand here and lie to my face.” She’s angry, she’s hurt and she feels the most vulnerable she has ever felt in front of him right now.

“I- I need you to hear me out first”

“hear what out Christopher!?” She says yelling to him not allowing him to continue further.

“I know you are mad but I need you to listen to me, please let me explain.”

“Lola wanted to meet up with me, it’s been a while since I last saw her and I figured it was time I saw her, she was such a big part of my life before I met you. She helped me become the man I am today, because of her I am able to be the Boyfriend I am to you today.” He says this not knowing it made shit worse and so much just clicked in Y/n’s head as he said he is the boyfriend he is today because of Lola.

“Do you love her?”

“What?” Chris’s face drops, he has no idea why she would ask that as he just explained the platonic nature of his relationship with Lola.

“Do you love the bitch or not Christopher, I am asking you a question. Either you answer it honestly or you get the fuck out of my face.”

As she says this she has tears running down her face, the anger on her face is very apparent to the man infront of her.

“I- no, Y/n? What? I love you and only you, I don’t need Lola, I need you, I need you alone.” The desperation in his voice was gutting Y/n, she wanted to hold him and tell him it’s okay she’s not mad at him, but in reality she couldn’t stand to even breathe the same air as him.

As Y/n is looking at Chris, she notices a smudge of make up on his upper lip, she became hot, angry, furious, whatever words could explain the absolute wrath that was filling her up

“You’re a fucking liar and you are full of shit, what the fuck is that on your face? Did you fuck her? Why the fuck do you have make up on your face Christopher!!!” She says yelling and she stood in his face and she got louder and louder as each word slipped out her mouth.

Chris knew he was fucked before but now it’s worse. He had no idea he had traces of Lola on him, hell, he would have hoped his dumbass brothers told him.

“Baby it’s not what you think”

“Fuck do you mean it’s not what I think?? So you did fuck her? WHAT. HAPPENED.”

“No, NO! That didn’t happen she came onto me, she was trying to get me to admit that I want her, Y/n I need you to understand that I don’t want her. I want you baby, you’re my world. She doesn’t amount to you. She never could and never will, please don’t do this” he was asking a lot from her, hoping she would understand despite her looking like she was seconds away from biting his head off.

“Get the fuck out of my apartment.”

“Baby please don’t do this.”

“Are you hard of hearing? I said get the fuck out of my apartment.”

And in that moment he knew, he was to blame.

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·✦·໒꒱ ────── · · ·

A/n: well that had a good ending…sooooo do we end it here or part 3? Lmkkkkkkkkk🙈

[thefairiesinthegarden]

This is me starting to try-pt4

———————————————————

Hi my little lovelies, with time and patience, love can blossom (THEHE good little reference for later) in many different ways

Word count: 2100 ishhh

Warnings: hope? Sadness???

Azriel x reader

Next part

__________________________________

Azriel sat by your side for what felt like days, his eyes never leaving your fragile form. Every passing minute felt like an eternity, and every breath you took was a reminder that you were still here, but only just. You hadn’t spoken much since that night—the night when you’d whispered that maybe, just maybe, you’d let him try for you. But nothing had really changed. The heaviness still lingered between you, the uncertainty clouding every moment.

He wanted to do more. He wanted to fix things, to take away your pain, but he knew that it wasn’t that simple. It never would be. The damage he’d done wasn’t something that could be healed overnight. It wasn’t something that could be fixed with promises or empty words. He knew that now.

But he had to try. He had to keep trying because the thought of losing you… it was unbearable.

On a quiet afternoon, after another long stretch of silence, Azriel cleared his throat softly. “Y/N,” he began, his voice tentative. “Would you come outside with me? Just for a little while?”

You didn’t answer immediately. You hadn’t left the room in days, hadn’t shown any desire to step beyond the walls that now felt like a prison. But something in his voice—something about the way he asked—made you pause. Slowly, you turned your head to look at him. His face was tired, his eyes pleading, as if he was asking for more than just a walk outside.

You weren’t sure if you had the strength to move, but something inside you stirred, the smallest flicker of curiosity breaking through the haze. With great effort, you nodded.

Azriel’s relief was palpable. He stood up quickly, offering you his hand, and though it took all the energy you had, you took it. His touch was warm, steady, and for the first time in what felt like forever, you allowed yourself to lean on him.

The Summer Court was beautiful, as always. The sun was warm on your skin, the breeze carrying the scent of the ocean and flowers. You had always loved the way the Summer Court smelled—vibrant and alive, a contrast to the darkness that often lingered in the Night Court. But today, the beauty of it felt distant, muted by the weight in your chest.

Azriel guided you through the palace gardens, walking slowly, giving you time to adjust to being outside again. The silence between you was thick, but not uncomfortable. It felt different from the suffocating silence of your room. Here, under the open sky, there was room to breathe, even if it still felt difficult.

As you walked, you became aware of the sound of birds singing, the rustle of leaves in the wind. It was peaceful. Too peaceful, considering the turmoil inside of you.

“I know it’s not enough,” Azriel said quietly, breaking the silence. “I know that I can’t just expect everything to be okay now. But I meant what I said, Y/N. I’m going to try. For both of us.”

You glanced at him, unsure of what to say. The sincerity in his voice was undeniable, but there was still a part of you that was afraid—afraid of trusting him again, afraid of letting him in.

“I don’t know if I can trust you, Azriel,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

He flinched at your words but nodded. “I know. And I don’t blame you. But I’m not asking you to trust me right away. I’m asking for a chance. Just one chance to prove to you that I mean it.”

You looked away, your eyes scanning the horizon. “It’s not that simple. You hurt me… deeply.”

“I know,” he said, his voice filled with regret. “And I’ll never forgive myself for that. But I’m not going to stop trying, Y/N. Not until I’ve done everything I can to make it right.”

You didn’t respond, and for a while, the two of you walked in silence again, the sound of your footsteps crunching softly against the gravel path.

Eventually, Azriel led you toward a field—a field full of wildflowers, swaying gently in the breeze. It was a stunning sight, the colors vibrant under the late afternoon sun. The flowers stretched on for what seemed like miles, a sea of blues, purples, and yellows. It was the kind of place that once would have taken your breath away.

Now, it only made your chest tighten with a sense of loss.

Azriel stopped, turning to face you. He stepped closer, his hands twitching as though he wanted to reach for you but held himself back. “Y/N,” he began softly, “I know I’ve ruined things between us. I know you’re hurt, and I know that words won’t fix what I’ve broken. But I’m asking you… please, let me try. Let me show you that I’m not that person anymore.”

You swallowed, feeling the lump in your throat grow. “I don’t know if I can,” you whispered, your voice breaking. “It’s not just about trying. It’s about everything that’s happened—everything you said. I gave you everything, Azriel, and it still wasn’t enough. How am I supposed to believe that anything will change?”

Azriel’s jaw clenched, his eyes shining with unshed tears. “Because I’ve learned from my mistakes. I’ve realized that pushing you away was the worst thing I could have ever done. I was scared—scared of how much you meant to me. But that fear doesn’t matter anymore. All that matters is you.”

Your heart ached at his words, but the pain of the past still clung to you, heavy and unforgiving. “I wanted to be enough for you,” you murmured, your voice shaking. “But I never was.”

“You’ve always been enough,” he said fiercely, his hands finally reaching for yours. He took them gently, as though afraid you might pull away. “You’re more than enough. I just couldn’t see it because I was blinded by my own fear. But I see it now, Y/N. I see you, and I’m going to fight for you—for us—because I can’t imagine a life without you in it.”

You stared at him, his words hitting you like a wave. A part of you wanted to believe him, wanted to let him back in, but the fear of being hurt again held you back.

“I’m scared, Azriel,” you admitted, tears spilling down your cheeks. “I’m so scared of getting hurt again.”

He pulled you into his arms then, his embrace warm and strong. “I know,” he whispered into your hair. “But you don’t have to be scared anymore. I’m not going anywhere, and I’m not going to stop until I’ve proven to you that I’m worth the risk.”

You buried your face in his chest, the familiar scent of him filling your senses. It was both comforting and painful, a reminder of everything you had lost and everything you stood to gain.

For a long time, the two of you stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, the field of flowers swaying around you in the gentle breeze. It was almost peaceful, almost like the past hadn’t happened—like there was still hope for something better.

But hope was a fragile thing, easily shattered by the weight of reality.

As the sun began to set, casting the field in hues of gold and amber, you pulled back slightly, looking up at Azriel. His eyes were filled with so much emotion—love, regret, hope. It was overwhelming.

“I don’t know if I can give you what you want,” you said quietly, your voice trembling. “But I’ll try. I’ll try for you, Azriel. I’ll try for us.”

His breath hitched, and he cupped your face in his hands, his touch gentle but firm. “That’s all I’m asking for,” he whispered, his forehead resting against yours. “Thank you.”

For the first time in what felt like forever, the tension between you eased, replaced by something fragile but real—something that felt like the beginning of healing.

But even as you stood there, wrapped in each other’s warmth, the shadows of doubt lingered at the edges of your mind.

You were trying. He was trying.

But was it enough?

Only time would tell.

———————————————————

I definitely fell like this chapter is smaller than other ones but oh well!!

[fandomfablesunleashed]

Quarrel

Ace x reader (she/her)

Chapter 16 of And they were roommates - Modern AU series

warning: alcohol consumption, swearing, arguing

I struggled with this chapter the most. I rewrote it so many times, and I’m still not really happy with it, but honestly, I don’t think I ever will. So, I’m just going to post it, so you won’t have to wait any longer. I’m not really someone who argues a lot, and I definitely prefer to write fluff, but well—it is what it is. 🤷

🫶@captainportgasdace 🫶

The party finally wound down, the buzz of laughter and music fading as your group of friends trickled out of the venue. The night, meant to be full of carefree fun, left you feeling heavier with every step. As you approached your apartment building, you and Ace fell into an uncomfortable silence. The weight of everything unspoken between you both pressed down, suffocating and unrelenting.

You became so acutely aware of Ace’s presence beside you that it felt almost unbearable. His footsteps were too close, echoing yours in a way that should have been comforting but wasn’t. His body language was tense, withdrawn. Every time your hands brushed, the spark of contact felt electric and wrong, like an overwhelming surge—too intense to handle. The almost-kisses—those moments you both pretended didn’t happen—lingered in the air. Neither of you dared to say anything, as if acknowledging what almost transpired would make it too real. It felt like there was an invisible wall between you now, one you could feel with every strained step.

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. The frustration bubbled up from deep inside, sharp and unrelenting, until it erupted, spilling out before you could stop it. “Why are you being so quiet?” you snapped, your voice cutting through the stillness like a knife. The words came out harder than you had meant—raw and biting. The harshness of your tone caught you off guard, but it was too late to take them back. The tension that had been building inside you for what felt like hours, days, or even months, had finally found its voice.

Ace’s steps faltered, his body stiffening in response to the sudden shift. He glanced at you, his eyes narrowing, his expression stiffening in a way you hadn’t seen before. “I don’t know, maybe because I’m tired, and I want to go to bed,” he muttered, his voice clipped, defensive. He wasn’t looking at you now, but you could feel the weight of his bitterness hanging in the air. His jaw was tight, his fists clenched at his sides, and yet there was something more—something buried that you couldn’t ignore.

You stopped in your tracks, the frustration boiling over. You couldn’t hold it back any longer. “Don’t give me that crap,” you snapped, your arms folding tightly across your chest, as if to protect yourself from whatever this was. “You’ve been acting weird all night. What’s going on, Ace?”

You wondered if he would be brave enough to mention another near kiss. You weren’t sure if you wanted him to. Part of you longed for him to admit it, to tell you that you weren’t imagining things. But at the same time, you were scared that you were just pushing things forward—that you were the only one who wished for more.

For a moment, Ace just stood there, silent. His eyes flickered briefly, and for the briefest of moments, you thought you saw something—regret, anger, pain—but it was gone so quickly that you could’ve sworn it was just your delusion. He shook his head and let out a humorless laugh, a sound that didn’t even reach his eyes. “I’m not acting weird,” he said flatly, his voice thin and forced. He seemed to be convincing himself as much as he was convincing you. “You’re imagining things.”

“Oh, please,” you retorted, your voice dripping with sarcasm. “You can’t even look at me now. Something’s clearly bothering you, and you’re too much of a coward to admit it.” The moment the words left your mouth, you knew you had crossed a line, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. The silence between you had grown unbearable, suffocating, and you needed him to speak—anything—to break the tension. You missed those days when he’d first moved in, when things were easy, pleasant, and most of the time he wore that stupid grin on his face—not whatever expression he had now.

Your hand brushed against the door handle, and you jerked it open with more force than necessary, the sound of it echoing in the hallway. You stepped inside, but as soon as you crossed the threshold, the apartment��your safe space—felt foreign. The familiar walls, the quiet comfort you once found here, now felt heavy, charged with the tension that followed you both.

Ace's footsteps were heavy and almost too close, quick and deliberate as he followed. You could hear the quick intake of his breath, and with a sharp exhale, he slammed the door behind him, the sound rattling the walls.

“I don’t know what you want from me!” Ace’s voice rose, louder than you had expected. The suddenness of it made you flinch. “I’m just tired, okay? Why does everything always have to be about you?”

His words hit you like a slap in the face, stinging more than they should. You felt your heart lurch in your chest, the burning sensation of something deeper than annoyance gnawing at you. It felt like rejection—like your presence, your concerns, didn’t matter. The hurt flashed through you before the anger took over.

“Oh, so now it’s my fault?” you shot back, the words tumbling out in a rush, your fists clenching at your sides, desperate for some sense of control. “I didn’t realize I was the cause of all your problems. Is that it?” The words left your mouth before you could fully process them, the bitterness laced with more emotion than you intended. You stood there, trembling slightly.

“You’re damn right, you’re the fucking problem!” The words exploded from him, raw and bitter, and you could see it—the regret, too late to stop what had been said, too late to take it back.

You felt your chest tighten as his words crashed over you, each one a wound deeper than the last. You wanted to scream, to throw everything back at him, but it felt like your voice was trapped in your throat, held by the weight of everything you hadn’t said—everything you had been too afraid to admit. The anger and pain built up, rushing through you until it felt like you might explode. And you did.

Your pulse quickened, and suddenly, you couldn’t keep the words in anymore. The frustration, the hurt, the months of whatever this had been between you—it all came flooding out at once. “Well, you’re my fucking problem too!” You felt your pulse quicken as the argument escalated, both of you moving closer in your heated state, words flying faster than you could process. The space between you shrank, and everything around you seemed to fade except the furious energy swirling between you both. There was no stopping it now. It felt like both of you were too far gone, too caught up in the emotion, the heat of the moment, to pull back.

You wanted to scream, to shout everything you’d been holding in, to demand answers about his feelings, to ask why he’d been shutting you out. You wanted to tell him how much it hurt, how much you cared, and how you needed him to admit what had been going on between you both. But the anger was too loud now, drowning out everything else.

But then, just as things were about to tip over the edge, something shifted inside you—a sudden awareness, a clarity that cut through the fog of anger. This wasn’t you. This wasn’t Ace. This wasn’t what you wanted. You inhaled sharply, forcing yourself to take a step back, trying to breathe through the tightening in your chest.

“We’re both drunk,” you said finally, the words coming out in a slow, controlled breath. “We’re not making any sense right now.”

His eyes flickered with something uncertain, as if he, too, had just realized how far things had gone. He ran a hand through his hair, rubbing his face in a way that made you feel like you’d just both woken up from some kind of haze. “Yeah,” he muttered quietly, his voice soft now, subdued. “You’re right. We’re not thinking clearly.”

The heat of the argument didn’t vanish immediately, but the intensity began to fade. You both stood there, breathing heavily, still reeling from the chaos of the last few minutes. Neither of you spoke at first, the silence now different—not suffocating, but laden with something softer, more resigned.

“I didn’t mean to say those things,” Ace said finally, his voice barely above a whisper, the rawness of the argument still hanging in the air between you both. “I don’t know why I got so worked up…” His voice trailed off, like he wasn’t sure how to finish the sentence.

You shook your head, softening, but your frustration still simmered beneath the surface. “It’s fine,” you replied, sighing. “I didn’t mean to snap either. I guess we both just… had too much to drink.”

Ace nodded, his gaze dropping to the ground, a faint flush still coloring his cheeks. “Yeah,” he murmured, almost too quietly. “We definitely did, and, um, we should probably just… go to bed. Forget this whole thing happened.”

Both of you fell silent as you made your way into your respective rooms. But despite the agreement to forget about the argument, the tension and unresolved feelings lingered in the air. Neither of you was quite able to forget the heated words that had been spoken—or the near-kiss. The night ended, but the emotions, raw and tangled, would be harder to shake. And neither of you was sure where to go from here.

Next chapter

[gallavichsreddie1128]

Change (Lore)

Description: Y/N hates Lore but he loves her.

Word Count: 931

Request: Lore x reader except the reader doesn’t like him back

Author’s note: I changed it a little but hope you like it! Also anyone want any stories for B-4? Send in requests!!!

Y/N sat with Data in Ten Forward having lunch. “You know your brother would hate this.” She said as she took a bite of her food. Data nodded, “My brother is very attracted to you.” He stated. Though he was stating the obvious. “Yes and I hate him.” Hate was a strong word but Data understood her feelings towards him.

Lore was trouble and it took a lot of convincing to let him on the ship after everything. He was now bunking with Data and had the hots for Y/N. “I understand your feelings towards him. Though he is trying to change.” Y/N rolled her eyes at that. She couldn’t believe that Lore would ever change. “You do not believe that?” He asked her and she sighed, “No. Not that you’re lying but he’s lying.” She said. Data nodded and looked around, he expected Lore to show up any minute and complain about how Y/N avoids him later.

Y/N looked at the door with Data as he walked in and his face dropped at the sight. He had a feeling that Y/N was into Data and vice versa even though Data states that he cannot feel. “Well that’s my que to leave.” She said and got up. She said bye to Data before leaving. Lore came over to Data and sat where she had been sitting, the smell of her perfume still lingering.

“You guys on a date?” Lore asked. Data always got the worst of it with Lore. He couldn’t feel anything for anyone and Lore knew that but that didn’t mean Y/N wasn’t. “Brother I have stated many times that I cannot have feelings. Y/N and I are friends.” Lore rolled his eyes and started complaining. 

Y/N stared at Picard as he told her that she would be bringing along Lore on the mission. Just her and Lore. Alone. Picard only trusted him around her and Data. Unfortunately, it was a known fact that Lore had feelings for her. She couldn’t argue with the Captain and Lore did know about the borg more than anyone else. Lore had a smirk on his face the entire time. Data kept eyeing the two as they had completely different expressions. Lore was excited and Y/N was annoyed. 

Lore stared at Y/N as she flew them to the location in the shuttle. She noticed the staring but ignored it. The entire way there she tried not to talk to him. “So you and Data?” He asked as they landed. “Just friends.” She said without looking at him. He followed her out of the shuttle and onto the planet.

“Okay so I’ve been told you know the borg pretty well.where would they be on this planet?” She asked. “I know about them not their mindset.” He told her and she sighed. “Why even be here then?” She mumbled but he heard her. “I get it you hate me but love my brother.” He said. She turned towards him, “I don’t love Data. Not like that anyways.” She said to him annoyed that he keeps bringing that up. “Right.” He said not believe her. She scoffed and turned to keep walking. “I haven’t done anything to you for you to hate me.” He said as he caught up with her. “Lore, let’s work instead of talk.” She said.

He felt anger and sadness build up inside of him, a feeling that he was all too familiar with. “No. Not until you tell me why you hate me so much.” He said. She turned to him, “Lore, you tried to kill people and take over the federation. Twice.” He rolled his eyes. “Yes I’m aware. That’s not me anymore.” She scoffed, “yeah okay.” She said and began walking again. “Why do you care anyway?” She instantly regretting it.

“Because I’m in love with you but you like Data. Precious little Data. He gets everything! The perfect life. The perfect Job. The Perfect Girl. Everything! He gets it all.” Y/N turned around at his outburst and gasped. Lore had tears in his eyes. “And You make me feel things I’ve never felt before and didn’t know I could but yet you hate me and you can’t lie to me I know you love my brother.”

“Lore” she said softly interrupting his outburst. “What?” He yelled. “You have tears.” She said. “That’s ridiculous I can’t cry I-“ but he felt his eyes and to his surprise he could cry. He’s been on the verge of it before but has never actually cried. He looked at her and she saw the heartbroken look in his eyes. Saw that he was being truthful.

“It’s you! You make me feel this way! You make me feel a way I didn’t know was possible.” He yelled. She slowly walked up to him, watching as he tried not to cry. The tears were flowing as she walked up to him. “Lore.” She whispered his name as she cupped his face. He looked at her, “I’m sorry.” He said. She shook her head, “Don’t apologize. I get it.” He started looking at her lips and she noticed. She gave him a small smile and leaned in a little, “How about we finish this mission and I’ll let you take me out on a date.” She whispered. He smiled a little and nodded. 

Data watched as his brother and Y/N laughed and talked across ten forward. He watched as Lore’s eyes lit up as Y/N laughed. He was watching his brother, who claimed superior over the human race and others, fall in love with one.

[baronessblixen]

Fictober Day 25: A House Is Not A Home (And A Dinner Is Not A Date)

Prompt: "It consumes me"

For the anon who sent this: Can you write a fic where an IT billionaire falls in love with Scully and pursues her, while Mulder gets very jealous - oh, and they're already dating, but still in secret. Rating: T, wc: 1,713

Tagging @today-in-fic @xffictober24

Over the past few years, he’s learned many things in therapy. One thing is to be honest with his emotions and not bottle them up and send them out into the world as a joke.

Right now, it proves to be difficult. How is he supposed to stay serious and true to his emotions when this 30-something guy with the whitest teeth Mulder has ever seen, is hitting on Scully?

“This was one of my prototypes,” the young man explains. Mulder knows he has a name. It’s Chad or something similar. Mulder doubts that Chad-or-whatever has caught his name, seeing how he only has eyes for Scully.

“Staying in this house was an experience.” Mulder glances over at Scully. Why is she indulging Chad-or-whatever? She’s smiling at the younger man. Oh. Oh, no. This man-child could be their son. Well, not quiet. Almost.

He’s seen Scully flirt plenty of times over the last 25 years – sometimes successfully and sometimes less so. Hell, he’s helped her out once. Too bad that the guy turned out to be a vampire. A fact Scully does not like to be reminded of.

“I cannot tell you how sorry I am,” Chad-or-whatever explains. “Let me make it up to you. I have another unit. Bigger, better, brighter. It’s yours. Rent-free for the rest of the year, of course.”

“It’s fine, Mr.-”

“Chad. Please call me Chad.” His grin is so blinding that Mulder has to look away.

“It’s fine, Chad. I do have a place to stay.” He wants to shove it in Chad’s face that Scully is staying with him. In their house. They’re sharing a bed. Something this guy can only dream about. The way he’s looking at Scully, he’s doing exactly that right this second.

“Then you must let me take you to dinner,” Chad insists, taking Scully’s hands into his. Mulder searches Scully’s face for discomfort, but can’t find any. He’s expecting her to politely decline any moment now. He’s waiting, and waiting, and waiting. It takes her a good ten seconds to answer – one second longer and Mulder would have done it for her.

“I’d like that, Chad.”

“You won’t regret it,” the younger man says, and Mulder stares at him with narrow eyes. “I’ll text you later. I have your number.” How much can a grown man grin? Mulder balls his fists, knowing he can neither say nor do anything. It’s not his place.

“Looking forward to it,” Scully says much to Mulder’s horror and Chad winks at her before he jogs off.

“Looking forward to it?” Mulder repeats, leaning his face close to hers, wondering what he’s missed.

“He’s sweet.”

“Sweet.”

“Are you parroting everything I say now? Yes, he’s sweet. It’s just dinner, Mulder. He’s sorry my house burned down.”

“Um, no, Scully. It’s not just dinner. That guy was hitting on you.”

“I could be his mother, Mulder. He wasn’t hitting on me.” But he sees doubt creep into her expression. “Was he?” Mulder nods at her. They went through this last year with Tad. Except back then, she was aware of what Tad was doing. And back then, she hadn’t been entirely uninterested. She admitted as much to him one night, not too long ago.

It was right after her house blew up and she moved back into their home. She said that she couldn’t in all honesty start being with Mulder again if she wasn’t honest. So she confessed about Tad. Mulder, on the other hand, had nothing to confess. No other women whatsoever. He had tried to hit the apps once and given up. It was Scully or nothing for him.

“It’s just dinner,” she says, shaking her head. “Mulder, he’s rich. He made a fortune with these smart homes. He just wants to make sure I won’t badmouth them.”

“So you’re going on a date with him?”

“It’s dinner,” she reminds him.

“Dinner, date, whatever. You’re going.”

“Yes, I’m going. You're not jealous, are you?"

"Me?" he asks in mock surprise, pointing at his chest. "Why would I be jealous if it's just dinner?"

But of course, he's lying.

*

She can’t believe Mulder was right. She and Chad are at an upscale restaurant where a meal costs as much as her monthly rent. He picked her up in a limo and brought her roses. That should have been her first clue. Mulder had looked miserable standing on the porch, watching her leave. As though she wasn’t planning on returning. Now she understands why.

“Dana, I cannot hold it in any longer.” In the dim light, his teeth look comically white, and his eyes are like molten chocolate pools. There are no blemishes on his skin and it hits her how impossibly young he still is. She knows a little bit about him; most importantly, she knows that he’s rich. Really, really rich. A billionaire, if the magazine she read is to be believed. Judging by his clothes, and his attitude, she has no reason to doubt it.

“Hide what?” Her whisper is not deliberate. The restaurant is quiet; a perfect atmosphere for two young lovers making their first moves.

“My feelings for you,” Chad says, smiling. “My love for you. It consumes me.”

“Chad, you don’t even know me.”

“You’re mistaken, Dana. I do know you. The moment I met you, I knew.” His smile is disarming. He isn’t a Philip Padgett, or a Donny Pfaster. He’s just a young, lonely man who’s mistaking his feelings for something they aren’t.

“Chad-”

“You said you’re single.” A mishap of her own making. She and Mulder have been back together for all of three months and she isn’t ready to let anyone else know. She knows that Mulder would like to scream it from the rooftops. He’s been the perfect gentleman, keeping his distance – as much as he can – and pretending to only be her work partner. It has worked so well that she’s ended up on a date with a man almost half her age.

She still can’t believe Mulder was right.

“I’m not… exactly single. It’s just very new and we’re keeping a low profile.” She can see the disappointment on Chad’s face, making him look even younger—almost like a little boy. His hand slips from hers, and he starts fiddling with his napkin instead.

“I should have known,” he says. “A woman like you. It was too good to be true.”

“Chad, there’s someone out there for you.”

“I thought it was you.”

He stares down at his plate and out of the corner of her eye, Scully spots a waitress, watching them closely. The expression on the other woman’s face is oddly familiar to her. Longing. Scully isn’t the first woman Chad has brought here and obviously, none of them have worked out. Maybe, Scully thinks, observing the waitress, he’s looking in all the wrong places.

“Excuse me a moment,” she says to Chad and he nods, not looking up.

“The restroom is this way,” the young waitress informs her when Scully walks toward her.

“I know. That’s not – you probably saw all that, right?”

“I’m not supposed to see things here, Ma’am.”

“I see the way you look at him,” Scully says softly. “I once looked at a man the very same way and I will go home to him now. Why don’t you keep him company?”

“I’m not supposed to… I couldn’t…”

“Sometimes we can bend the rules,” Scully says to her and the younger woman gives her a shy smile. She nods and takes a deep breath before she walks over to the table. Scully watches for a moment and is convinced that she sees a spark in Chad’s eyes. Before the man can spot and miss her, she disappears.

*

Imagining Scully on a date with another man while they were broken up is one thing. Waiting for her to return from a date while they’re living in the same house is torture. It’s shortly before 9 p.m. when he hears the tell-tale sound of the key in the door. His heart is doing somersaults. Returning home early has to be a good sign, right?

“Hey you,” Scully says, throwing her purse into a corner before she plops down next to him on the couch. She smells like roses and vanilla. A primitive part of him is trying to detect a whiff of competition. There is none.

“Hey.” He gives himself 15 seconds. If she doesn’t start talking until then, he’ll ask.

“You’re not going to ask how it was?” She turns to him. She’s gone for minimal make-up today and he spots her freckles peeping through. That alone makes him smile.

“Didn’t want to pressure you. How was it?”

“You were right.”

“Oh, you know what gets me going, Scully. How was I right?”

“Chad. He was hitting on me. He was interested in more than just dinner.”

“And?” He trusts Scully implicitly. There’s no doubt in his mind that she loves him. She wouldn’t have come back if she didn’t. That doesn’t mean he trusts Chad.

“I told him that I’m not available.”

“So Chad’s the first to know about us? Did not see that coming.”

“He said he loves me,” Scully says, shaking her head in disbelief. “He’s only just met me.”

“Hmm, I get it,” Mulder says, nuzzling her neck. He’s not staking his territory, but maybe he is. Just a little bit. “I was infatuated with you right from the start.”

“You were not.”

“Oh, but I was.”

“That’s funny,” she says, kissing him. “Cause I had a crush on you, too.”

“What about now? Do you still have a crush?” Another kiss, this time longer and with more tongue.

“More than a crush,” she murmurs into his mouth, and together they make their way upstairs. In the morning, Mulder will admit that he was jealous. Just a little bit. And Scully will raise her eyebrow, but smile and remind him that he has nothing to worry about. Ever.

That’s confirmed when a month later they get an invitation to Chad’s wedding.

“That guy moves fast,” Mulder says. “I wonder who she is.”

“Oh, I know who she is,” Scully says, grinning triumphantly, recognizing the waitress she saw in the restaurant that night.

[ghxstlly]

Semicolon

586 words, Attorney AU

TW: Non-violent suicide attempt

Occurs roughly 1 month after Ego Death

—

Ira,

I don’t know if you’ll ever see this. I know you said you wanted me out of your life, so when/if this reaches you and you don’t want to read it, that’s okay.

I’m not exactly sure what’s going to happen after tonight— it’s not something I can plan for, but I think I can safely say that you won’t be hearing from me again. I think that makes this a pretty good time to clear the air.

Meeting you was the best and worst thing that has ever happened to me. 

We were a disaster waiting to happen. I should have known better. I should have listened to my instincts. I don’t know why I didn’t— that wasn’t like me at all. I guess I wanted you bad enough to try and be something I’m not.

I just had no idea it could hurt so bad. It isn’t at all like people say, or how it looks in movies or books. It isn’t beautiful, or sweet. It is raw and ugly and awful, like being eaten from the inside.

Is that how it’s supposed to feel? Or did I do it all wrong? Maybe I was never meant to feel this way about someone. Maybe I'm not strong enough for it. I guess I’ll never know.

But despite all that, something I realized in the time since we last spoke is that I would gladly do it all over again if I could, even knowing how it ends.

I don’t regret knowing you. Not even a little.

You have the most integrity of anyone I've ever met. You’re fierce. You’re brave. You’re everything I’m not.

You deserve to be happy. You deserve someone strong like you, someone you can trust. Someone who won’t let you down. I wish it could have been me.

And even though I know I was stupid for feeling the way I did about you, I think I’d be more stupid not to. I love you, and I miss you, and I hope that someday you might miss me too, even if just a little bit.

I’m aware that sounds kind of pathetic, but I suppose there isn’t any point in being anything other than honest right now.

That’s all. Thank you for being a part of my life.

I’m sorry I had to complicate things.

—Freddie

—

In his trembling hands, a small mound of white pills sat like pearls. He looked at them for a long time, counting them, thinking about nothing.

He brought them to his mouth, paused, wavered, and drew away. 

It’s not going to hurt. There’s nothing to be scared of.

Taking a deep breath, he lifted his eyes.

In front of him, a blanket of sticky notes hid his reflection, crowding the mirror, the bathroom wall, the medicine cabinet, their messages scribbled in shaky blue pen, desperate, fearful.

You'll get through this.

Everything will be okay.

One step at a time.

Though they begged and pleaded, they could not reach him where he was, now, suspended in a moment of eerie calmness, of detachment, and soon the pills were back against his lips, but they would not pass. 

He gagged. He choked. His mouth refused them, again and again and again.

No matter how many times he tried, he could not swallow them. A terrible, frustrated sob tore from his throat, his vision blurring with tears.

He felt his lips moving, saying, I can’t, I can’t, but he couldn’t even hear his own voice.

[return-to-twisted-wonderland]

🔆anon

Canis wasn’t supposed to be up right now. He was well aware, but his body made sure no doubt would be left. He should be in bed right now because apparently if he’s in the wrong place at the wrong time, he ends up in the middle of an overblot fight.

He just had to make friends with Heartstopper and Bluey over there in Heartslabyul. He just had to listen to them complain about their dorm head. He just had to join them when they went to challenge him “for their safety”.

Does Canis regret what he did? No, not really.

Does it hurt as he bumbles his way to Ramshackle to make sure his other friend Grimstone has food? Absolutely.

He opened the door and it only took one second for the screaming cat appear in front of him, swiping at the bag he brought. “It’s been the whole day! I was starving.” Grim sniffed the air. “And what’s that smell? Smells like you brought something extra good.”

Canis pushed past Grimstone as he tried his best to close the busted door. He went to sit down on the dilapidated couch before taking out some tuna. “Relax. I had a lot happen today. And I just brought you usual stuff.” He opened the can, and was assaulted by the horrid smelling fish. “I still don’t know how you can stand this.”

Grim dumped the can of tuna in his mouth, not even swallowing before he stared talking. “Mu-uph. U gof somfing good. I shmell it.”

“I can’t understand you if you talk and eat.”

Grim gave a hard swallow to everything in his mouth. Canis was genuinely shocked he didn’t choke or something. Then again, is Grimstone even capable of that? “I said you’re lying. Cause I know you got something good. I can smell it.” Without asking for permission, he went to dig through the inside of Canis’s blazer.

“Hey! Stop that! I went through a lot, I’m not in the mood for games, Grimstone.” He pulled out the cat only to notice a black stone in Grim’s paw. Is that what he meant? That was a stone he just picked up after the fight with Red Rose. He thought it was cool and picked it up, but shoved it in his pocket without thinking when someone came over to him. There wasn’t any smell on it though.

“See! I knew you had something!”

“That’s just a rock. Does stone eat stone or something, Grimstone?”

“If it’s just a rock, why does it smell so good? It smells like a bunch of flowers and cakes and stuff.” Grim shoved the stone in his mouth. “Tasts lyk it too.”

“That’s a rock! Spit it out!” Canis tried to pry open Grimstone’s jaws but it didn’t work. The stone ended up swallowed.

“You seriously bought some good candy and wanted to keep it to yourself by calling it a rock?”

“You know what?” Canis took a deep breath. “I’ve had enough today. I’m just going to sit here in silence for a bit. You have the bag of food. It’s got some sandwiches and water and stuff left. Get whatever you want. I’m just going to close my eyes.” He closed his eyes to the sound of Grim shuffling through the bag, and the world started to fade as he drifted off to sleep.

Oh jeez

Grimmy please, stop eating the rocks.

[traineecryptid]

NPSS Weibo Q&A (20240831) Part 5

This is a Q&A session held on Weibo. People will tag their questions with the hashtag #南派三叔藏海花在线答疑# (#NPSS Zang Hai Hua Online Q&A#) and NPSS will look through the tag to pick some to answer. The event started at 1500 hours on 2024 August 31st.

Folder with screenshots and big compilation google doc is here. Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here.

1634

Q: Sanshu! I really need to know this, does Xiaoge shave?

A: Don’t you think it’s a little weird if he doesn’t shave?

1635

Q: Shu, why did writing ZHH affect your mental state like never before? (But this is also the time where everyone thought that your writing was in top condition.)

A: It’s the emotions and scenes. If I can’t write out the scenes, at most I’ll have a headache. But I have to sacrifice myself for the emotions.

1637

Q: Shu! I want to know if Yucun Wu Xie returned to the “Dragon’s Backbone, come quickly” moment in the beginning, what would he do?

A: He has to go. Else, he’ll lose even more.

1638

Q: Can the Scorpion Team be reassembled in the later episodes?

A: Scorpion Team is in the story after this.

1639

Q: Sanshu, will Haixing grow up to become a very powerful adult in the future?

A: She will. But she will also have her own worries.

1643

Q: You seem to understand fengshui very well.

A: I knew how to write it the most when I didn’t understand it. But after understanding it, I dare not write it anymore. I’m afraid that writing it will disturb the dragon’s veins.

1643

Q: Shu, at the moment when Wu Xie knew about Xiaoge’s backstory, if Xiaoge was right in front of him, what would he say to Xiaoge? What would Pangzi say?

A: Buy wine. Wine. Wine. Drink some, drink some. Pangzi, is there food in the fridge? Go take a look.

1647

Q: Is Wu Xie satisfied with his current condition? Does he have any regrets?

A: Do you know that once a person is satisfied with their condition, they would start to be afraid and collapse from the nice things. Little satisfaction is greater than big completion. Never ever live in a condition where you’re satisfied with yourself. Because after that, it’ll be the pain of losing everything.

1650

Q: Shu, Xiaoge had obviously saved them. How did you come up with Zhang Jiuri and Zhang Nian’s turning point where they hate Xiaoge?

A: Keep watching. That’s key.

1658

Q: What do you think about the saying “even if it sucked, at least a Heavenly Palace”? Do you plan on remaking Heavenly Palace?

A: Yes!

1658

Q: Xie Yuchen wanted some shares of the eye disease research. Will Hei Xiazi’s eye disease get better?

A: The more patents he gathers, maybe there will be a chance to get better.

1829

#NPSS Zang Hai Hua Online Q&A# Let me say this to everyone. There are a lot of you who don’t allow comments or only restrict comments to your followers yet you keep @-ing me nonstop. I don’t know what this means. I’m really— I wrote a long reply but then I can’t post it. It’s really maddening.

1831

Q: (T/N: original question was deleted but according to the comments…) Didn’t you say that you’ll keep answering questions? Where did you go? A: I went to take my food delivery.

1840

Q: Last year you said that Wu Xie smelled like peaches. So, what does Menyouping smell like?

A: The scent of distant mountains brought by the wind.

1841

Q: Shu, don’t the Iron Triangle’s Pangzi deserve a trophy for his awareness? Something like “The spiritual middleman who touched everyone’s hearts in the DMBJ universe.

A: Once you understand Pangzi’s importance,  you’ll understand a very important part of this story.

75 questions (or well 75 posts now!) I'm really sleepy today so pardon the mess of the grammar and what not. But I will do a double update today.

[ejzah]

Collateral Damage, Part 2

***

“Kensi’s pregnant?”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Oh my god, that’s why she was sick for two weeks.”

A sharp whistle cut through all the chatter and jarred Deeks enough for him to realize Sam was walking towards him, blocking out everything else.

“Everybody shut up for a minute,” Sam said. Gripping Deeks’ shoulder, he dipped his head, giving the illusion that it was just the two of them. Deeks focused on the tight, almost painful pressure of Sam’s fingers. “Deeks, can you hear me?”

Deeks nodded sharply, purposely drawing in a long breath.

“Good. Now are you sure about Kensi being pregnant?”

“Yeah. She’s 13 weeks,” Deeks answered, his chest squeezing so tight he thought he might pass out.

“Hey, steady Deeks, it’s going to ok,” Sam said, centering Deeks with a palm in the center of his chest. Glancing over his shoulder at the rest of the team that Deeks only just now noticed were still watching. “C’mon, let’s go take a breather. You guys get everything together. We’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Deeks numbly followed Sam to the locker room, barely aware of anything around him. In the back of his mind, he knew he needed to rescue Kensi, but overwhelming panic made focusing on anything impossible. Kensi, their children, could be dead right now.

“Hey, Deeks, breathe!” Sam ordered him as he carefully shoved Deeks down onto a bench.

“I—I can’t,” he stuttered out between ragged breaths that did nothing to stop his fuzzy vision or shaking hands.

“Yes, you can. Focus on me, Deeks.”

Deeks looked into Sam’s eyes, forcing himself to study the way his pupils almost blended into his irises.

“That’s good, Deeks. Now breathe with me.”

After an unknown amount of time, Deeks felt his heart rate start to slow, and the tightness in his chest eased.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m terrified, Sam. I feel like I’m about to lose everything.”

“That’s understandable,” Sam assured him. “This is scary.”

“If anything happens—this pregnancy is everything to both of us, but for Kensi. I don’t know what she would do,” Deeks whispered. “This can’t be happening.”

“We aren’t going to let anything happen to them. In order to do that—and I’m probably going to regret saying this—I need angry Deeks to come out to play. Because as destructive as you can be when you’re angry, you get things done. And Kensi and your baby need you right that from you right now.”

“Twins.”

“What?” Sam asked, thrown off by the single word. At any other time, Deeks would have been pleased to shock Sam Hanna.

“We’re having twins,” Deeks repeated slightly more loudly. He laughed weakly. “Not exactly how we planned on telling everyone.” Tilting his head back, he swallowed against his teeth. “I need them back, Sam.”

“We’re going to do everything in our power to make that happen,” Sam told him. “And you’re going to be right there with us.

***

A/N: I hope this was satisfyingly angsty and emotionally whumpy.

[the-amber-raven]

Snippet Sunday

It's just past midnight here, so it is technically Sunday... and when I wake up it will be all about NYE and I have no faith that I'll have time to post so doing it before bed! It's been a hell of a crazy and kind of awful few weeks quite frankly, but I'm proud of myself for completing the first chapter of the 6b fic before the end of year.

I haven't done one in a while, so have a slightly longer snippet where Bobby gets some initial inklings that Buck is perhaps more involved in the Diaz family than he realised:

--

“Are you sure you don’t want to make yourself one, Buckaroo? There really is a perfectly good room for you to stay in.” 

“Bobby said he’d make blueberry pancakes for breakfast,” Harry added enthusiastically. “And I’m working on getting him to do his mac and cheese for dinner!” 

“That does sound amazing, but I need to pick Christopher up from his party tonight so I definitely can’t,” Buck said apologetically. He was genuinely regretful, because the idea of waking up to Bobby’s pancakes and then maybe helping him bake mac and cheese while Athena and Harry hovered near them as they caught up and unpacked Harry’s things was a pretty amazing fantasy that he would have enjoyed indulging in. 

“Christopher?” Bobby said sharply, startled and concerned. “Is everything alright with Eddie?” 

“Of course,” Buck replied, mystified as to what had made Bobby jump to that conclusion. “Eddie dropped him off, I just offered to do the pick-up."

"Eddie didn't feel comfortable driving at night...?" Bobby probed, mouth pressed together in worry. There was a brief period, right after his breakdown, where Eddie had avoided driving at night since he was anxious about potentially getting triggered by something so Buck supposed he could understand where Bobby's worry was coming from.

"No, nothing like that. It just didn't seem like there was much point in him going when I was planning to crash at Eddie's anyway."

Bobby didn't look any less concerned, so Buck expanded his explanation.

"I promised Chris that we could plan out our next zoo visit tomorrow. They’re offering koala photos at the moment plus there’s some new baby gibbons so we need to make some sacrifices and adjust our usual schedule.” 

Bobby opened his mouth, probably to ask for more detail because he now looked puzzled. 

However, Harry jumped in first, his eyes wide with wonder. “As in you can take a photo with a koala?”  

“You can take one holding a koala if you want.” Buck pulled out his phone, handing it over to Harry once he found the screenshot that he’d sent to Eddie which explained the experience and showed a sample photo. He angled it so that Bobby could also see the phone, wondering if maybe Bobby hadn’t been aware that the LA zoo had Australian native animals and that was why he was confused? 

--

Hope y'all have a Happy and Safe New Year's Eve! And may the muse be stronger than ever in 2024 ;)

[abbatoirablaze]

Deal With The Devil, Chapter 2

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: slight angst, manipulation, using a sibling as a bartering chip, dubcon engagement

“We’ve got to find a way to make sure Barton, Romanoff, and Belova stay in their place.”

Steve nodded along with everything Sam was saying, “I know…I’ve got something in the works, but I can’t show my hand just yet.  I don’t want them involved in it.  Last thing I need is for any of them to catch wind and try to get the drop on me.”

“Well, what is it?”

 “Something that could really put the odds in our favor, Sam.  It’s why I called Buck earlier and told him to get back here.”

“That meeting was too close for comfort, Steve,” he reminded his long-time friend, and boss, “you saw how they just trounced in like they owned the place.  The three of them joined up and their territory is nearly as big as yours.  I understand that you have Brooklyn, but they have Queens.  Now, I know that to the west of us, Stark has Manhattan, and he’s chummy with Parker, who has the Bronx.  And you know Thor won’t take Romanoff’s side.  He can’t stand her.  But he’s friends with Clint…so who knows…”

“Odinson is too stuck up to side with anyone.  He’ll keep Staten Island to himself.”

“I think our play is getting in with Stark and Parker,” Sam reminded his friend, “they aren’t looking to combine, but they could be allies.  The three of us would be able to keep Barton, Belova, and Romanoff out of the way.”

“The boroughs have their families…no one will combine, Sam…you’re right on that.  None of us are going to be willing to give up our power.  Or our land.  Not when our families have fought so long for it in the first place.”

“We need to meet with them…”

“I’m way ahead of you,” Steve reminded Sam, “Like I said, Wilson.  We have to leave for our meeting in a few minutes.  Buck won’t be back in time.  Leave a note for him about setting up the club for tonight.  We won’t be back before open.  Then have him set up to scope out the three stooges.”

“Got it, boss.”  

Tony scoffed as he looked at Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson, “you know…you’re down a man on your entourage, Rogers.  Got a little weakness in your ranks?”

Steve frowned, suddenly regretting letting Bucky have the time to scope out what Barton, Belova, and Romanoff were getting up to in Queens. 

“Recon!” he said simply, not wanting to give Tony too much information about his own operations, but wanting him to know that one of his best friends wasn’t a weak link in his business, “are we going to talk business, or are you going to just keep me standing at your door all day?  I’m a busy man just like you are…but I made time to come to you, Stark.”

Tony smiled suddenly, gesturing for Steve and Sam to come in and sit in his boardroom, “I was wondering when you’d come by, Rogers.  Belova, Barton, and Romanoff already tried to get me to side with them…but I’m not keen on the idea of combining boroughs or letting go of any of my territory.”

“Nor am I.”

“Only one who’s territory I wouldn’t mind sharing is with Parker…but you know that,” he shrugged, “our families have been friends forever.  I married his cousin, Pepper, so we’re practically family.”

“I’m aware…”

Tony’s smirk widened as he went over to the bar that lined one of the walls.  Reaching up he grabbed a rocks glass, and a crystal decanter, pouring some amber liquid into it, “so then, Rogers…tell me why you’ve stopped by…you’re being awfully short on words, which is quite uncharacteristic for you. And some would even say that you are coming across a little secretive.  You wanted to talk business, so let’s talk.”

“We could be allies…”

“I have an ally in Peter.  Together our territories are bigger than the rest of yours; even if you did side with those trio of stooges and Odinson.  And we’re plenty strong on our own.  If you’re trying to ask for protection, this isn’t the way to go about it, Rogers.  You’ve come without giving me anything.  So try again.”

“I’m not asking you for protection, Tony.” Steve growled, “and I’m not going to sit and grovel just so I can become besties with you and Parker.”

“I wouldn’t ask you to, Steve.” Tony replied, “you’re far too headstrong for that.  And anyways, I know that you don’t really need an alliance.  You’re not looking to start any problems with anyone else, now are you?”

Sam stared between the two men.  The tension in both of their voices did nothing to ease the situation that everyone was aware of. 

“Your sister…” Sam said simply, showing the hand Steve had hoped to keep closer to his vest, “we know that she’s of age.  She has been for a while now, but no one has come for her.  And while you’ve tried to keep her out of the family business, we know that Barton approached you about her hand…and so has Odinson.”

Tony scoffed, “and that means that you’re here to do what?  Throw your name in the hat, Rogers?  Who’s to say that I won’t marry her off to one of my lieutenants?”

“If you planned on doing that then it would have already been done,” Steve pointed out, “and anyways, every single one of them that rank high enough is already married with children…and I know that you aren’t going to pimp your sister out to them as a mistress.”

Tony’s jaw clicked, eyes flickering up to Steve’s, “watch what you say about my sister, Rogers.  Inez has plenty of options, not that it’s any of your business…”  

“Bullshit!”

Tony frowned, “Rogers.”

“Come on, Tony.  Be realistic here.  We both know that she can’t exactly marry your wife’s cousin…I know that the families have done some questionable things over the years…but that one would be a little more than curious.”

The door closed softly behind the latest addition to the Stark family, pulling away from the tension in the room, and Tony watched his wife curiously as she came into the conversation.  Pepper’s brow raised, “Sam has a point, Tony…Inez can’t marry Peter, as much as you love him like a younger brother.  That’s coming a little too close to a line that I don’t feel comfortable crossing; even if he would take her as his bride!”

Steve smiled. 

Tony’s jaw twitched as he looked at the younger man, “what are you smiling about, Rogers?”

“I’m just the best prospect your sister has,” he smirked even more as he sucked in his cheeks, “Brooklyn is a tough borough, but we are strong.  Compact.  My family has ruled it with an iron fist since the boroughs started, just as the Starks have, and the Parkers.  I know that we haven’t always gotten along, but I’m the last of the old families.  If you give her up to Barton or Odinson, you’ll be caving in to new blood.  I mean, if you give her to Odinson that sends a horrible message.  His dad was one of Potts’ lieutenants, but he had no issues getting rid of her father just to fill the space.”

“That’s enough!” Pepper growled, “you won’t disrespect my father by t-“

“Pepper,” Tony sighed, cutting his wife off with a single look, “Rogers is trying to explain why he should get Inez’ hand.  He meant nothing by it in talking about your father…right Rogers?”

“I apologize,” Steve frowned, sparing her a glance, “I mean no disrespect, Pepper…I’m just trying to explain my position.  As Tony said.”

“Then tread carefully, Rogers!” Tony warned.  He reached up and put an arm on his wife’s waist.  She sighed and moved into his lap before grabbing the rocks glass and drinking the amber liquid.

“Right,” he answered, “as I was saying…Odinson would send the wrong message.  Parker is practically family.  And while my number two would have been a good option had his father been able to keep the borough that those idiots run now, that only leaves me.  You don’t want to give in to a borough that has three people leading it.  They haven’t had stability since Buck’s father was executed…you’d be sending her into a fucking massacre.”

“Are you getting to your point anytime soon, Rogers?”

“You need to send the right message, Stark…a carefully crafted one that has all the markers of being strong, bold, and thorough,” he reasoned, “anyone other than me, won’t send that.  If you gave her away to another family’s lieutenants, that wouldn’t do it.  That might put the wrong image of you out there.  Might give people the idea that you’re soft…aging out of your position before your time by giving the only daughter of Howard Stark to someone that’s unimportant.  You don’t want that.  You don’t need that.  You need me, Tony.  Send a message of strength.”

Tony’s jaw twitched even more at the younger man’s insinuations, “you’d be smart to be nicer to me, Rogers.  Especially since you’re asking for my sister’s hand.  Manhattan may not be the biggest borough, but our contributions are strong ones.  You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t need me just as much as you’re insinuating that I needed you.”

 “Boys…” Pepper said with a soft, but warning tone.  Tony looked to his wife, and then to the man from Brooklyn, “if you’re not here to ask for protection, or wanting to combine your territories, then what are you looking for Mr. Rogers?  An alliance and my sister-in-law’s hand must not be all that you’re asking for?”

“How do you even know about Inez?” Tony asked after a moment, “I’ve done everything I can to make sure that none of you have seen her.  My mother and father worked tirelessly in making sure she received her education outside of the states…she only came back after their deaths, and I made it my life’s purpose to make sure that I stayed the most powerful borough, and maintained the secret that I even had a sibling.”

“Just because she’s a mystery to us, doesn’t mean we don’t know of her existence, Tony,” Steve chuckled, “sure…none of my guys know what she looks like, but we all know that Inez Stark exists.  It’s my job to know who is who, and how to make sure I don’t lose my place to someone attempting to fly under a radar.  Be smart, Tony.  You had to have known that one day this would happen.”

Tony’s eyes closed and he rubbed his forehead.  Steve frowned, suddenly feeling guilty over using Tony’s younger sister as a pawn.  He remembered how his best friend had felt whenever Mr. Barnes had used Bucky’s sisters as bargaining chips in retaining the number two position under his father when he lost Staten Island to Odin Allfather when he was a child.  He remembered how his best friend’s heart broke when his sisters were shipped off to different parts of the state to keep Odin Allfathers’ empire happy, and the outlying generals up his sleeve. 

“I never wanted this life for her, Rogers…” Tony said in a slow, sad voice, “my parents never wanted Inez to be a bargaining chip…and she’s not going to be one.  She’s my sister.  I don’t want this life for her.  I know what happened to Barnes’ sisters.  And Wilson’s sister…I know the torment that Pepper felt when she thought she was going to be used as a bargaining chip for her father’s power.”

“No one ever prays for that life, Stark…” Steve frowned, “it’s why our fathers all prayed for boys.”

“Pepper…can you go get Inez for me?” Tony asked his wife gently.  Pepper gave him a soft look and nodded, before leaving the boardroom.  Tony downed the rest of his drink and began towards the wall once more.  This time he grabbed two more glasses.

“Sam doesn’t drink on the clock, Stark…”

“Third glass is for Inez,” he muttered softly as he filled the three glasses and walked back to the table, “she’s going to lose her shit when she hears…I’d always told her that when we were little, that I’d keep her safe…now I’m about to hand her over to a wolf.”

Steve chuckled, a sigh escaping his lips as Tony slid a glass over to him, and placed the third on his side, “Look…I never had a sibling, so I don’t know what this is like from your side…but I remember how much it tore Buck up when his dad lost Staten Island to Thor’s father a few decades back…I-I may seem old school, but I have respect for women…I helped Rebecca get out of the Allfather’s clutches when he started using them up like they were chips.  I just want you to know that your sister will be safe with me, Tony.  I can promise you that.”

Tony’s eyes flickered to the young Rogers man, “you have a reputation, Steve…you may have helped Barnes’ eldest sister, but that was for a different reason.  We all knew that you cared for her in a different way.  You don’t know my sister…and I know what you do…your reputation is one that people are loud about.”

“I know what they say…”

“Yeah?” Tony asked, “and what’s that?”

“I’m known for fucking the girls in my clubs…I know…”

“That stops when you marry Inez…”  he warned thoughtfully, “and if I ever see her with a mark-“

“I’ll be kind to your sister, Tony.”

“She’s a reserved one, Rogers…”

“Is that your way of saying she’s ugly?” he asked cheekily, “because I can do a wedding just for the paper’s sake and you could keep her here in her ivory tower while I take a mistress.”

There was a gasp from the door.  And suddenly Steve regretted his words.  Pepper stood beside a young, dark-haired woman, who looked simply appalled. 

“Shit…” Tony cursed, his eyes trailing between his sister and newest ally, “Inez, this is-“

“Whatever business deal you’re trying to set up, I won’t be a part of it, Tony,” she growled, shooting her brother a look that should have sent him to the grave, “I’m not some piece of pussy you can barter with…and I’m not some homely, desperate woman looking to be married off to a pompous ass either.”

She shot Steve a look and he frowned. 

“Inez…” Pepper sighed.  She shot her sister-in-law a worried look, and Pepper put one hand on her shoulder, wrapping it around the younger woman, while the other made its way to soothingly rub her other arm, “Tony’s doing this for you, Inez…this is Steve…Steve Rogers.  He runs Brooklyn.”

The young woman swallowed the anxiety that was building in her stomach.  Steve stood up to properly examine the young woman. 

She had olive skin, and her curly chocolate hair seemed to fall down her back, flowing like a river of ringlets.  She was petite, and perfectly proportioned, and Steve found himself salivating at the thought of her as his wife.  He found himself regretting the cheeky joke even more, knowing that he had unintentionally dug himself a hole where he wasn’t sure he’d be able to dig himself out of.

And as much as it was a business proposition to align himself with Tony and Peter, actually seeing his future bride made him want to please her, in hopes that he could do more than just have her on his arm.

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” she groaned, rolling her eyes and separating herself from her sister-in-law only to find herself walking towards the bar.

“I already got you a glass, Inny…”

“Save it for yourself,” she moaned, opening the crystal decanter and taking a large gulp of the amber liquid inside of it, “the rest of this is mine now.”

“Woman after my own heart!” Steve teased as he shoved his hands in his pockets, “gorgeous and knows how to take what she wants.”

Her eyes flickered up to his, and his breath caught in his throat, “let’s get one thing straight right now, Rogers…one thing I’m not going after is your heart.  And despite your position, I’m not impressed with your cheap words.  So, you can go to hell with that cheeky attitude right now!”

“Happy engagement, sis…” Tony tried nervously as he looked at his little sister.  Guilt gnawed at him when he watched the happiness drain from his little sister’s face, “I-I’m sorry Inny…”

“Don’t call me that, Anthony!” she all but begged as she gave him a sad look, “I-I don’t want you calling me by that name, anymore…not now.  Not after this.  I’d rather marry Peter…”

“Inez,” Pepper tried, rushing up to her, “you have to understand.  We’re doing this because Steve is the lesser of three evils.  You saw Clint Barton and Thor Odinson both coming in the past week and Tony turned them down…he wouldn’t put you in harm’s way or-”

She turned towards her brother once more, “Tony…were you-were you waiting on Steve to come to you for my hand?”

Tony frowned, his younger sister revealing his thought process aloud as his wife explained it to her.

“Pepper…”

Steve’s brow rose as he too, hit the realization, “so Odinson and Barton were already here?  And you already turned them down?  Stark, you were waiting on me to come for your sister, weren’t you?  Who exactly was it that let it slip that you had a sister who was of age?”

“Like you said, Rogers…” Tony sighed, grabbing the glass and downing it like it was a shot.  The glass hit the table with a firm click as Tony breathed out, “we need each other…Inez was the ace in my pocket.  I knew that you’d come for her.  It was only a matter of time.  You needed an alliance.  Well so do Peter and I.  Odinson and Barton want to start another war…and we’re going to stay out of it.  You marrying Inez means that the three of us band together and stay neutral.  Let the new bloods kill each other…and the three of us will split the territory when it all goes to shit.”

Chapter 3

Tag List:  @teambarnes72, @prokey16, @lohnes16

[ode2cheol]

minute too late

this is angst there’s no happy ending ＾▽＾ there’s not even any fluff ＞ω＜ 0.7k words

jun couldn’t take his eyes off of you. but oh he prays he could.

because the more he looks at you, the more he stares and hates himself for staring.

you’re not his to admire. you’re not his to want to compliment every time he lays eyes on you. you’re not his to want to hug you, and kiss you, and just tell you everyday how much he loves you.

does he even love you?

he knows he does but he tries asking himself that every now and then so he can convince himself he hasn’t been hopelessly in love with you for as long as he could remember.

everyday he regrets introducing his friend to you that one day.

and everyday he’s disgusted with himself for being so jealous of his friend for becoming your boyfriend instead of jun.

it’s not fair he thinks, but maybe it is?

he supposes it’s his own fault. why couldn’t he tell you sooner? why was he so much of a coward? why was he so afraid of rejection? why was he so sure you didn’t feel the same way?

he knows why. because he’s seen how you look at him, the look you’ve given to any past lovers was never the same as the look you gave jun. he knew he couldn’t compare. and at the end of the day, he’d rather he suffer in silence rather than lose you forever.

that was what jun wanted, but why was he avoiding you now? he couldn’t stand to be near you when that lovesick grin was never for him but for his friend.

“babe? you haven’t heard from junnie have you?” you asked nervously from your boyfriend’s side, “he hasn’t answered his texts. and ever since we all hung out that day he’s hasn’t said anything since he randomly left. and every time me and soonyoung tried hanging out with him since he says something came up”

“jun? nah he’s been the same to me, did you guys have an argument or something?” he replied, rubbing your side gently.

“no not that i’m aware of” you pouted, “hey how ‘bout i text him from your phone to see what’s up?”

“no! u-uh no” your boyfriend jumped, “you— you can’t do that- sorry baby. how ‘bout you just drop by his house instead?”

you eyed him for a few seconds before shrugging, “sure. hopefully he’ll actually talk to me instead of just slamming the door in my face”

you spent most of the car ride just thinking about jun. why was he avoiding you? did you do something to upset him? you sat nervously for a few minutes in your car parked outside of jun’s place.

you knocked on his door, dusting anything off your sweater while you waited. why were you so nervous? this was jun. jun who you’ve known since you were a kid. jun who you’ve been through practically everything with. jun who you had that crush on in-

“yn” he sighed, luckily, he actually did answer, albeit he probably didn’t even know it was you when he answered considering his surprised face, looking at you for a few seconds before his gaze was stuck on the suddenly very interesting sleeves of his own sweater, “something wrong or..?”

“can’t i just see my best friend?”

right. best friend.

“especially since my best friend has been avoiding me for a week. what’s up? did something happen? did i do something to make you mad? whatever it was junnie i’m really sorry-“

“you don’t have to be sorry. i promise” he cleared his throat, “it’s just— nothing. yn, i can’t do this anymore. i don’t deserve this, you don’t deserve this, your boyfriend doesn’t deserve this— let’s just, agree to not hang out anymore”

and before you could reply, he was gone. you chuckled mirthlessly at how he really did slam the door on you. at least he actually heard you out you guess, is what you tried to humour yourself with to distract yourself from the tears pooling in your eyes. you hummed along with the music in your car to distract yourself from the tears falling down your cheeks when you knocked his door for five minutes before you realised you really had lost your best friend.