#I really like the pot of gold one tbh

[cardinalphlox]

hallo!! Im back :3

The snail one took 52 images be grateful /hvyj

[not-poignant]

I hope it's okay to ask, but how are things? Looking forward to Underline The Gold on Sunday so much

Omg I'm looking forward to it too

Tbh I'm up to chapter 8 on that now so we're ready to really start pushing ahead with some of the side stories which is exciting

As for me, it's been pretty rough, anon, not gonna lie. I'm going to put this under a read more because I'm pretty honest and also because there's more than one 'I might have cancer' mention among other things:

I kind of thought I was doing fine and then it all got on top of me a couple of days ago and (self-harm mention) I ended up self-injuring due to autistic meltdown. Sometimes I don't realise how bad things really are until I'm at that stage and I have bruises and soft tissue damage to show for it. I've since talked to my doctor and therapist about it, but like...oof.

I've actually been taking a break from writing since I've hit 50k and I generally have a rule that I have to take at least 2-4 days off once I've hit that point, but I'm still pretty stuffed, but mostly for health reasons. I've written 14 chapters this month so I feel okay about the break lol.

On Friday (the day after the meltdown) I needed to have a hand X-ray (even right now, the knuckles in my left hand are really sore), see my GP for 40 minutes, talk to my therapist, organise an iron infusion (I have microcytic anemia and need an iron infusion again, which I think is my 5th or 6th - I need one about once every 2-3 years, and mostly the time between is the slow downward spiral of losing more and more iron until I'm truly fucked) and a meeting with one of the head haematologists in the state because my red blood cells are bullshit and weird (yay). Guess that explains the exhaustion.

I still need to organise a lymph node ultrasound (which is probably nothing, except there is like a 'higher than average' chance it could be metastatic cancer, since I do have tumours in my head right now that could metastasize, and the tumours are extremely close to the swollen lymph node - also I haven't had a virus).

I need to organise a meeting with a dermatologist, I need to organise a full abdominal MRI to see if I have any other tumours we don't know about, and I got an eating disorder management plan for restrictive eating, which does entitle me to like...cheaper dietitian appointments, but also formalises me as having an ED as opposed to 'disordered eating.'

On top of that I had to deal with a tribunal after my Dad had a catastrophic stroke a few months ago, and the tribunal was last month, to determine who would look after him. Our family is so broken and my stepmother so manipulative/vindictive that the government decided no one could be trusted and took care of his finances and healthcare themselves meaning none of us can have any real say in his future (truly the best outcome, but a damning one for the state of the family), and I also had to listen to my stepmother accuse my sister of being a criminal for 20 minutes with completely unfounded lies, and of course, my Dad has had a catastrophic stroke, and that's complicated. That's a whole...

That saga is so much anon, I cannot even begin to explain even the tip of that iceberg.

I've been spending a lot of extra time like scanning family photos and other things and packing items in his home for storage etc. and while that's been done now for over a month and a half, I guess the burn out started some time ago and it's just been slowly getting on top of me. Kind of the 'slowly boiling a lobster in a pot' analogy.

I've been overall quieter on Tumblr as a result of all of this, and it all just...destroyed me on Thursday, and ever since then I've been recovering.

I've just realised it's nearly 1.00am and I swear the last time I looked at the clock - which felt like 5 minutes ago - it was 11.00pm.

Oh and to top it all off I've had vicious 'not falling asleep until 4.00am' insomnia + increased nightmares because my PTSD has relapsed back into 'pretty severe.' So um, managing most nights on 3-4 hours of sleep a night, and that's bad for all my chronic illnesses, of which I have many.

Ah. Yeah. :(

Lemme rustle up some good news for you, anon, because I feel like this is just too much crap.

Bushflowers/wildflowers are really nice right now as it's turning to spring in Western Australia (it's Djilba in the Noongar seasonal system, which I prefer)

Rhubarb is in season so I'm making a lot of stewed apple and rhubarb as a comfort food.

Reading the manhwa Punch Drunk Love and enjoying it.

Asks like yours - even if all of this sounds dire - helps me to undestand that I actually do have good reasons to feel tired and that it's okay to take breaks and that's really valuable (sometimes - though rarely - people use my anon function to talk at me, rather than talking to me as a person, and I just...really value feeling like a person sometimes aslfkjsa) so while I might seem down, this has actually been nice to end my night on. Also you've reminded me that I am super excited/happy to share more Underline the Gold with people

I got some organisational stuff and organising stuff in the house makes me feel good.

I have an extremely good doctor and tbh for a long time I didn't, so like, every good specialist and doctor is worth their weight in gold. :)

I hope you're doing okay and looking after yourself / taking care anon, and that you get something good out of what remains of the weekend. <3 And for everyone who needs one, hugs are on the house.

[kawaii-butt-crust-core]

Rise of the TMNT headcanons because I feel uhhhsodk emotions or something

Warnings: anxiety , gore mention, trauma/PTSD mentions, kidnapping, yelling mentions, claustrophobia mention, if I missed any please lmk ‼️‼️

Donatello ( my favorite hands fucking down )

LOVES "it's always sunny in Philadelphia" and relates to Dennis wayyy too much

( also made a joke about how splinter is frank and he was actually cool with it )

Likes those HYPERBOP and songs like that

At 5am and raph is waking up for the day and he finds Donnie in his room fully awake

"Ive been up for 3 days everything is haunted everybody's evi-"

He also likes twentyone pilots

House of gold, taking my time on my ride, and car radio are his favorites

Actually hates monster ( like the drink ) but he has a can in his room from 2020 that he just poured out for decoration

( honestly I can't even really hate on it I think 2020 just ruined it LMAO )

Has no blankets. Sleeps with a single sheet and a unwashed unsheeted pillow.

Is one of those people that people mistake for way older

Yokai thinks he's at least 18-20 and get so freaked out finding out he's actually just 14

( he loves the attention )

He actually likes HOMESTUCK 😭

( this is based on my friend who likes Homestuck and they remind me of Donatello to some degree )

Has a fan that hasn't had a break since 2016

Maybe longer

Has seasonal depression

He likes to be with April or doing something during the winter because of it to distract himself

April and raph are good with helping him

Leo knows but he knows to just stay out of his way and leave him the fuck alone

And Mikey hasn't really been told because Donnie feels like he's burdening people with his problems ( he didn't even want Leo to know but he just caught on )

He even feels guilty for dragging April and raph into it

Him and Mikey LOVE LOVE LOVED spiderverse

( Donnie got the movie illegally before it even came out )

This mother fucker definitely fell to his knees for spider punk im so sorry

This same mother fucker also probably loved Danganronpa...

He doesn't really like southpark but some episodes get to him

LOVES GHOSTFACE

TO ANOTHER LEVEL

NO ONE CAN LOVE GHOSTFACE AS MUCH AS HIM

Actually probably has purple injected into his veins

"yeah my veins bruise in the blink of an eye and I can't move my body sometimes but so what? It was worth it??"

hates on dream so hard....

DONT HUG ME IM SCARED AKWNWJJF

ALL OF THE BOYS WATCHED IT ( maybe not raph tho actually )

He actually made discord ( idk if I'm even joking or not )

Would this be a good time to add a picture of what I think human Donnie would look like?

Uhhh yeah

Yeah I think so

Ok next

Leonardooooooooo

Just fyi this shit is gonna be so angsty

It will dip I promise

He can't get enough of those "drake the type" memes

But also low-key he is drake

Has a hello kitty clock in his room that actually works for him

He was that annoying ass kid who would say "I can scream like a girl" and then scream to the top of their fucking lungs

The ADHD was tooo muuchhh

So he just basically climbs walls who cares

He's on the ceiling? What's new.

Ok so spieerpunk had don to his knees but Leo was all for Miguel

" NOOOO MY SPIDER PAPIIIII- " *splinter right fucking there*

Daddy issues just crawling out of all of their skin ANYWAYS

Can't draw for shit but loves art

The way he words things makes him sound like a complete gaslighter but he's just stupid

"?? I don't gaslight?? HUH no seriously what did I do?"

The Mario movie possessed him for a while tbh

DIP!

even hours after him returning from the prison realm he was dissociating so bad he was crying to feel something

Just a few weeks later, he isn't better yet by any means he's just ok enough to function

Someone dropped a plate or something ( I probably need to rewatch the scene before I make headcanons for it LMAO ) or dropped a pot, something loud

And he practically went down with it

He fell to the floor and stayed there for a bit

He didn't cry or say anything

Then Mikey tapped his shoulder and he fucking SNAPPED

He will never forgive himself

🫶🏼

The CRUCIAL NIGHTMARESS

*rubs my hands in evilness*

He could feel the same AIR as the prison realm at times

He smelt the same scent

Raph, draxum, and Casey had to sleep in the same room for a while so they would hear him

But sometimes he didn't loudly jerk himself awake

Sometimes it played through and he woke up and didn't make a peep

Sometimes they knew and sometimes they didn't

Most of the time one of them would just wake up because of instinct and see him just frozen

Can't handle gore now

He used to but can't anymore

It reminds him of 1

The kraang

And 2

Seeing his brothers eye all fucked up like that was too much

There were times he didn't even know who he was anymore

He was scared to leave his room for a while and felt such bad guilt for it

While they're out on a mission and Leo's just curled up in his room blowing up raphs phone

Raph wishes he could say something like "oh how the tables have turned" but this isn't what he wanted at all

Uhh ok sudden switch up

HE LOVES BO BURNHAMMMM

Him and Don and Mikey listen to Will Wood

SHAYFER JAMES TOO

JUST THOSE TYPES OF ARTIST

Mixed with late 90s to early 2000s

"erm.... what da flip ;-; NO STFU IM JUST KIDDING STOP BULLYING ME ITS A JOKE-"

Him if he was a hummmaannn

+ maybe some scars on his back

Raphael

Blind in his one eye and low-key has bad eyesight in his other one

He can still see decently but it's pretty much fucked

He likes squishmellows but he knows Mikey LOVES them so if he buys/ finds one, he'll give it to Mikey

He's more of a "childhood stuff animal nostalgia" anyways

Doesn't like to cuss but if he's REALLY scared, he'll let a loud and quick "FUCK -" slip out of his mouth

Or if he's angry hell mumble "this bitch-" or something like that

He feels like he's not doing enough as a brother but genuinely forgets that he needs to take care of himself

Not physically but more so emotionally

He beats himself up when making a mistake even if it was out of kindness

He doesn't think things all the way through and just immediately jumps to "I wanna help people!"

And ends up making a bigger mess so he feels like a bad person

( people have reassured him he's not but he plays back how people get mad at him when he messes up and he doesn't know how to forgive himself if someone got THAT mad at him )

He sometimes just gets this burst of love and just hugs one of his siblings or friends

I think he doesn't develop feelings easily ( infact it's kinda hard for him to, not in a bad way )but one time there was a yokai, about his size, and they really enjoyed each other

He didn't tell anyone but he got her number and they still talk and he might have small feelings for her

The reason he hates being alone because it's a PTSD thing ( that only got worse after the kraang thing )

( he was alone and in danger for most of the movie, the only reason he wasn't freaking out because he knew if he did he was fucked )

And he got possessed before he could even lose his shit

But basically I think he got kidnapped by a hunter and held him captive ( either chained, or in a cage ) for 2 days before splinter found him

( yes they searched for him for 2 days )

The hunter would shoot his gun next to the cage ( or restraints ) he was in to purposely mess with him

And if he cried he would get in his face and start yelling until raph forced himself to stop crying because of fear

It was traumatic

Splinter has his own trauma from losing his fucking kid for 2 days, but it still fucks with raph badly

He still remembers it so vividly that it feels like it had only happened a week ago

So add that in top of the kraang doing what they did to him.....

He was only holding it together for Leo tbh

He can't go to certain areas or he'll start to hear the hunter yelling in his face again, like a hallucination

It's gotten a little bit better over time but the kraang set him so far back

He was also already claustrophobic, but if anyone tries to hold him down now he just immediately throws them off

And hard

Anything that really reminds him too much of the past he just starts freaking out

So he doesn't like to be alone :)

I could do a separate post for this maybe

But moving on

Any early 2000s song from anyone or any 2000 themed song is his SHIT

They did a karaoke night and he did Brittany spears ( yes I know that's like late 90s but yk THAT CATEGORY )

He put on a blonde wig tho and was actually kinda feeling it at some point

He LOVES walking around at night

Just strolling

He loves food. He eats everything

There is nothing he won't eat

He just loves everything

I forgot his scar sadly but here 😔‼️💔

( the nose piercing is fake he's too scared to get one HELP )

Mikey:

This lil shit STEALS

HE USES HIS INNOCENCE TO HIS ADVANTAGE

And I sleeps fine at night with all of it in his room.

ADVENTURE TIMEEE

he loves cartoons

Adult cartoons, children cartoons

If it's animated he wants it injected into his spinal fluid

His music taste is everything

But he really likes indie / indie rock songs

Has all of his art and drawings hung up on his walls

There's maybe one or.two posters he actually bought the rest is his art

Loves spiderverse but he couldn't even enjoy it because he kept looking at Leo crazy with this out of pocket comments

"I wanna pick him up like a baby lion and wash him and feed him milk and release him back into the wild"

"*deadpan* Leo. What the actual hell."

Draxums favorite. Only Mikey knows he's his favorite. If anyone asks drax who his favorite is he says he hates everyone equally and looks over at Mikey

Speaking of drax I think they're vent buddies

Drax vents to him Mikey vents to drax

Drax was very helpful with all of them during the time they were all fucked up from kraang

He even got them into therapy but I'm gonna make a draxum section because I love him ( I lied he's my favorite character, then Donnie)

( God I love drax and Mikey so much let me go on a rant rq )

Apart of draxs training he could definitely pass as a licensed therapist

So if really anyone has some sort of mental thing going on he's there

Even for Leo ( even tho Leo didn't really want his help, that quickly changed tho, again I'll just put this in his section✨ )

But Mikey has these really bad panic attacks that even his brothers don't know about

Only splinter and drax

Splinter is there to comfort him and drax is there to let him talk about it

Mikey doesn't want his brothers to know because he's technically the "therapist" so splinter and drax will never tell anyone

Watched MSA just to make fun of it

Also says cringe shit because he thinks it's funny like Leo

"GYATTTTT....... Y'all know I'm joking right-"

Loves Lilo and stitch

Has an art Instagram with over 1000 followers

LOVES SPICY FOOD

He ate the spiciest chip and then asked for another

Loves spooky month

Fought leo for that damn hello kitty clock

Then stole it

" I'm in your walls :3"

He ate a like 2 handfuls of orbeez when he was 5 before splinter caught him

HUMAN

Draxum:

MY ACTUAL FAVORITE FUCKING CHARACTER AAAAAAAAA

YES I absolutely believe he could qualify as a therapist and he absolutely uses that to his advantage

Leo was still "ish" about draxum but he became a lot more appreciative of him during the times that raph and Casey couldn't be there ( like missions )

He even took time out of work to be there

If he called? He's already almost there

He absolutely a mom IDC he even has the messy mom bun

Mikey calls him dad and that's part of the reason he's his favorite

"honey, it was ruined when she bought it *snaps*" ( I'm sorry ) ( I have to draw this now)

LOVESS BLANKETS

Like all the blankets

The resting bitch face is so real

He has to be leaping for joy happy to maintain a happy face

Goes to Donnies room and tells him to lay his ass down ( he doesnt )

Sends millennial memes to the boys....

*insert a cat smashing on a piano* he's wheezing.

Him and Mikey paint together sometimes

Because he can actually paint super fucking good

Scars all around his body

HUMAN FORMMM

Thats all ill probably make more for April and Casey and splinter

[madfoxx]

listen i loved s2 as much as the next guy but some of the plotholes are just hilarious to me because they employ the fanfiction logic of “i want this scenario to happen so it will just happen” and i feel people aren´t talking about it enough, so here are some of the things that made me go “oh, no beta read huh.”:

1) first question: why the fuck did gabriel delete his memory?? seriously though, i havent seen one single post about this, but i just dont understand!? So, heaven threatens to fire gabriel and delete his memory, which, okay, bad news. and then his solution is to....delete his own memory for them, so now he doesnt remember his own name let alone the love of his life, beelzebub, who he planned to run away with?? WHY??? he left heaven immediately afterwards anyways it literally made no sense and just caused major problems for everyone involved. But i guess the answer is: we needed him to have no memory for the story to happen so that makes sense by ao3 standarts

2) on a related note, why was he naked?? he could have just speedwalked outta heaven in his suit with the matchbox in his pocket, so why strip down?? Again, no reason, but arent you glad we got to see john hamms naked butt, so lets pin that on gabriel being an sweet dumb himbo maybe

3) also, how did he find aziraphales shop while not even remembering his own name? Dont know dont care, googlemaps probably.

4) not really a plothole, but that whole Maggie and Nina getting locked in the bookshop thing was the tropiest trope they pulled this season and it didnt even work because we got nothing from that scene, not even one hearfelt deep conversation

5) this one is a bit pedantic, but how is it that a demon with magical powers has to live in his car? i guess its a character thing and we need to see him at his lowest point but he could literally just miracle himself an enormous pot of gold if he wanted to

6) why would beelzebub order an attack on the bookshop and risk gabriels life? why didnt they simply explain the situation to aziraphale & crowley? well you see we didnt want the story to be over after 1 episode and also we needed a finale of some sort.

7)  i mean the whole attack on the bookshop was just....a thing that happened i guess. kinda strange the demons (especially shax who seems to have at least 1 spare braincell) would dare to kidnap an archangel in the first place. isnt he like, insanely powerful? and they didnt even know he lost his memory, so to them he was just an archangel hanging out on earth because he wanted to. how did they think storming the bookshop and taking him prisoner would go down?

8) tbh i dont really understand why heaven wanted gabriel back so much they would threaten to destroy anyone helping him and then....they just let him just go without any problems whatsoever? feels incredibly anticlimactic and illogical to me but i suppose the season needed some kind of threat to make the romantic elements work

9) this might actually get resolved in s3 but i cant believe Upstairs wants aziraphale - an angel who spend years deceiving heaven and overall just sucked at his job because he was too busy trying to fuck a demon - they want him to be the new supreme archangel of heaven. he literally stopped the last apocalypse a couple of days ago and now he´s in charge of armageddon 2.0? that´ll for sure take some explaining!

there´s a lot more stuff, but these are the most obvious things that have been on my mind since s2 aired. i also want to reiterate that i do love many things about this season despite the writing being all over the place. and no, i dont believe that all inconsistencies will be magically explained away by s3. i think it boils down to neil gaiman saying “lets make a big budget 6 chapter fanfic so david tennant and michael sheen can kiss each other on the mouth. also not beta we die like eric the disposable demon” and i can respect that. 

[dollsonmain]

Photos over the course of the morning:

So, this is the space I have to work with. The only thing I can think of why Rolly would have installed an over-large toilet in the basement bathroom is that he liked to sit there to poop and didn’t want his dangle touching the rim.

It’s very much in the way.

I NEED counter space to work, so moved some stuff around and added a tiny shelving unit that just barely fits into the space between the sink and the wall. The sink leaks so I keep the faux drawer front off of the front of the cabinet...

Wrangled a bench under there for extra storage space. The bench is wider than the table so doesn’t exactly fit.

There’s ONE power outlet. It is a small bathroom. It’s very funny to me that Scott was just shaking his head at his father having run power strips around the bathroom and here I am stuck doing the same thing. Mine’s not zip-tied to the wall, though, and the outlet part isn’t right above the sink. It’s on the back of the too-big toilet. I don’t like having a toilet in my workspace, but no one ever uses it, so it’s just a bowl of blue water. I flush it now and then to keep it fresher and that’s it.

But then I took my small utility carts down there and had to move the table and bench again to make room. I do prefer the table not cutting off half the walkway.

Drying rack is back in the shower. I have to be very careful what I put in the shower because it can and did leak. I also can’t put anything over the back of the toilet because I need to be able to access it if it starts leaking again.

I took out the toilet paper holder and the towel rack because both were in the way. I should take down the shower rod. It’s just tension and installed crooked, but everything I take down reveals lots and lots of holes and missing paint. Rolly didn’t take them down to paint (and apparently doesn’t know how to decide where to drill a hole for a screw swiss cheese walls what the fuck), and I didn’t, either when I repainted.

BUT Pony Cart also needed to go in there, which meant the table and shelf had to come out, and that sucks because that’s all of the counter space. I NEED counter space. I’m used to having an approx 1ft by 1.5ft segment of counter space.

If I hadn’t depressed enough at this point because I’m having to cram myself into a windowless bathroom, I was then. I’m claustrophobic. This was unpleasant.

Right now this is all the workspace I have. If I were able I’d get and install a different sink vanity thing that had some counter space. I can’t do that because money. I was going to put all of my bottles of T.A. on the bottom of this shelf thing but I don’t think it can take the weight, tbh. They’ll go in the shower.

Rearranged a little, again, and that’s better. Dehumidifier will probably be on top of that gold plastic table there, with the hose pointing at the shower drain which is just below it.

I need to take the pony bins down, still, and clean up the kitchen because I’ve made a mess up there dumping things off of workstations to get to the furniture.

I also need to find a place to store the small appliances when they’re not in use. I was keeping the mini crock pot and ozone generator on the table in there, but it’s gone. I’ll need to take my electric kettle down, too. It’s ONLY used for doll and pony hair.

I’m tired. It’s all futile. I comply here, he starts poking his nose elsewhere shrinking and shrinking my space.

Obviously, all work is off until the dehumidifer gets here or else the basement will explode into mold again.

Removing the resin jugs did immediately improve the air quality. Those are out in the garage.

I still need to move the SunBox down, two large and one medium storage unit, all of my dolls, and my computer and things (I’m not sure there even are enough outlets down there to accommodate my computer, not that I really trust Rolly’s electrical work), which I guess will go where the unused sewing machine is.

Act like my stuff is unwelcome in his space, see how he likes having no me near him at all.

[your-pal-nebula]

WordGirl characters feat my OCs portrayed by Bob's Burgers, Compilation Edition (tho some of them don't have my OCs- I just made them cuz they were funny)

-----

Miss Davis: Okay everybody, read the list and find your randomly assigned buddy.

*Silver and Royal Dandy go up and read the list, they both start screaming up not being together*

Miss Davis, desperately editing the list: AHAHAHA, WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT, SILVER AND DAN JUST SO HAPPENED TO BE PARTNERS.

-----

Cori: When I kiss Victoria under the disco ball, it'll be like we're all kissing Victoria under the disco ball.

Tobey: Okay, well I'm going second, because I don't wanna have to go after you guys.

Silver: I'll go last. I'm fine with that.

Twobrains: WE'RE NOT KISSING VICTORIA.

Silver: YES WE ARE!

-----

Silver: All we need is some gold-colored clay, a hard mold, and one of Ms. Question's coins.

Cori: And the blood of a virgin.

Dandy: What's a virgin?

Cori: I think it's somebody who gives a lot of blood.

Dandy: Oh, my mum's a virgin.

-----

Twobrains: WE'RE ABOUT TO DIE, SILVER, YOU REALLY WANNA SPEND THE LAST MOMENTS OF YOUR LIFE SARCASTIC?!

Silver: NnnnooooOOOOOOOO!

-----

Twobrains: Happy valentines day. ...I didn't get you anything.

LRW: I didn't get you anything either. ...You wanna go make out?

Twobrains: ...Yeah :)

-----

Big Left Hand Guy: YOU'RE GONNA ARGUE WITH ME NOW?! WHILE WE'RE FLYING 30 MILES AN HOUR DOWN A RIVER?!

InvisiBill: YEAH!

-----

Reason: Oh come on, the leak isn't THAT bad.

*him and Rhyme literally have like... 10 pots on the floor for catching water*

Alynxai: Hey gu- AAAAAAA- *trips over all the pots*

-----

I might actually draw all of these someday tbh

[tilbageidanmark]

Movies I watched this week (Year 4, week 4)

The blue caftan, my first Moroccan drama by Maryam Touzani, and another one starring Lubna Azabal ('Incendies', 'Tel aviv on fire'), this generation's Hiam Abbass. A daring topic about a closeted bisexual tailor who hires a new apprentice while his wife slowly dies. It's extremely slow, and tbh took me a few starts to get into, but eventually it won me over with its beauty, especially the metaphor of the embroidered blue caftan itself which he eventually finishes. 8/10.

*Woman Director

🍿  

“Everyone has their reasons”

First watch: Jean Renoir's The Rules of the Game, a comedy of manners about the haute bourgeoisie in Europe on the eve of World War 2. Banned nearly everywhere for two decades.

As of now, I haven't seen four from the Sight & Sound Greatest 50 films of all time list, ('Beau travail', 'Sunrise', L'Atalante' and 'Wanda'), which I plan on visiting soon.

🍿  

2 with André Dussollier:

🍿 François Ozon's latest film, The Crime is Mine, was an unexpected 1930's-style screwball comedy. A light and fluffy murder bonbon with a lesbian subplot, a feminine message of sort, and Isabelle Huppert as a faded Norma Desmond diva who used to act in the silent movies of “the great Alice Guy”! 7/10.

🍿  Truffaut's worst film, A Gorgeous Girl Like Me, was a chore to finish. No wonder I never heard about it before. An unfunny, unsexy black comedy about a an immoral, horny grifter who was arrested for murder, and the hapless sociologist who fell for her. 1/10.

🍿  

"... Evidently, an Ethiopian in the fuel supply: Seems to me I'm getting the old heave-ho..."

My Little Chickadee, a strange western spoof, with two completely subversive cynics, who really had nothing to do with each other, and yet were thrown here together in a middle of an otherwise-unfunny mix. W C Fields, a boozing, resigned con-man, and Mae West, an eye-rolling, horny sex-pot. How incredible this story 'could' have been, if it was given air to breath, filled completely with one-liners, was not censured, and stripped of all the fake moralities!

🍿  

Now that Jon Stewart is returning to 'The daily show', I discovered that he wrote and directed Irresistible 3 years ago, which came and went without fanfare. It's a mild and old-fashioned political satire about a Democratic consultant, the likes of which were done many times before. But it contained a fantastic twist at the end that made the whole thing absolutely vibrant. Rose Byrne is gorgeous as usual, and Mackenzie Davis felt to fill the moral fulcrum of the movie, and the end showed why. Don't read anything about it beforehand, if you decide to watch it. I saw it twice in the same evening. 8/10.

🍿  

Beyond the Bolex is an interesting documentary about a fascinating man, Jacques Bolsey. It is deftly told by a young director who was not aware that the unheralded inventor of the Swiss Bolex camera was her own great-grandfather. The story of this nearly forgotten pioneer is reminiscent of other giants of the arts, forgotten and now re-discovered: Hilma af Klint, Georges Méliès, Alice Guy-Blaché, Vivian Maier, each of them earned a new comprehensive biography.

(Unfortunately in my view, this one was the blandest of the five, due to the narrator's irritating intonation.)

*Woman Director

🍿  

"Stay Gold". First watch: Coppola's seminal The outsiders, the first of two coming-of-age adaptations he made of SE Hinton novels in 1983. Teenage gang members in a mid 60's Oklahoma town, born on the wrong side of the tracks, with early performances by a bunch of the "Brat pack" members, including young, red-haired Diane Lane, and cameos by Tom Waits, Melanie Griffith, and Sofia Coppola as a child looking for 15 cents. Now I'm off to see 'Rumble fish'. (Photo Above).

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An Irish Goodbye, a benign trifle about two estranged brothers, one of whom has Down Syndrome, dealing with the death of their mother. Won the 2023 Oscar for live short.

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3 re-watches:

🍿 “Sometimes you do your best work when you got a gun to your head.”

After reading the New Yorker story about $300K/week script doctor Scott Frank, I had to go back to his breakthrough Hollywood satire Get shorty. And indeed, wow, what a brilliant screenplay, economy of dialogue, elegance and balance, and a perfect cast (each of the 10 top billings stars was born to play their roles here). And so appropriate of him to place the emotional 'Touch of Evil' viewing scene at exactly the 45 minute mark, where it serves as the heart of the story. 9/10.

🍿  “This is your Rubicon. Do not cross the Rubicon!”

My second watching of Alexander Payne's absolutely charming The Holdovers (and the adaptation of the 1935 French 'Merlusse', which I saw last month too). 10/10 again for superb soundtrack and writing-directing as well as general kind-hearted wholesomeness.

I haven't seen 'American Fiction' yet, but in my opinion Paul Giamatti and Da'Vine Joy Randolph deserve to win this year's Oscars for best actors. Also that this will quickly become an American Christmas classic.

🍿 Oh, how I didn't like the heavy-handed Paths of Glory on re-watch. Yes, it exhibited a brave anti-military sentiments for Cold War 1957, but the injustice inflicted by the generals on the privates was laughably outdated. In was nice to see young Joe Terkel, in the second of his three Kubrick roles. And at least, it was the only time that Kubrick raised his own private curtain, by directing his (then-new) wife, as she closed the movie with her tearful cabaret singing. 3/10.

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The Constant Gardener, my 3rd by Fernando Meirelles (after 'City of God' and 'The two Popes'). It's an adaptation of a John le Carré's thriller about corrupt British diplomats in Kenya, a corporate conspiracy by multinational drug companies, and a love story (which is the weakest part of the whole thing).

I had a mixed reaction to this, nothing serious, won't go into it. The only lasting memory of this for me will probably be the Kothbiro leitmotif. 6/10.

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Torremolinos 73, a Spanish sex comedy from 2003. A bald, plain-looking man and his loving wife start making explicit home movies in 1973 Spain, after his career in encyclopedia sales ends, and 'become big in Scandinavia'. The premise is somehow promising, but it quickly develops into a ridiculous story about how he becomes interested in legit movies making. He ends up directing one symbolic Bergman-inspired art fart, with none other than young Mads Mikkelsen. 2/10.

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2 short shorts:

🍿 Dollar Pizza - Food porn of the highest quality makes you hungry: Now I want a slice! No judgement! 9/10.

🍿  The sheep and the flower, a real time (2 minutes) animated movie that fits in 8 kilobytes. Decent graphics, animations, direction and camera work, and the matching music… all in 8kB.

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Throw-back to the "Art project”:  

Pizza Adora.

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(My complete movie list is here)

[the1975attheirverybest]

its just so evident that women love shitting on other women to prop him up and i dont care for it. like saying he looks better or happier with one person is just digging at everyone else. or even going as far as to say he’s finally with someone hot when all of these women are objectively stunning? no one’s capable of just being like, she’s pretty! he looks happy! good!

Ohhh bestie were you on here when people were sending asks like “Meredith is not marriage material” or whatever? Like Matty’s gotta trade her in for some goats and a pot of gold coins. I’m sorry, is this the 1400s????

It’s extra painful to me, tbh, cuz like I expect it from other fandoms and their toxicity (I speak as someone who was deeeeeeep in the one direction fandom back in the day and is currently deep in the Harry Styles fandom) but from us 75 fans???? I thought we prided ourselves on deconstructing such sexist behavior. What the fuck is happening to us?

Even the idea that if matty is with someone else it must mean that Meredith’s been misled or whatever. Cuz the woman is always the wide eyed idiot and he’s the rockstar so he must be the one who broke things off or whatever. Yeah. The fandoms sexism is really showing.

[jellycaustic]

Tagged by @shadwife, thank you! :D

Last Song: Glitter and Gold by Barns Courtney. Not the sort of thing I usually listen to; I heard this song like a month ago on a marvel AMV and it actually made marvel sound sort of appealing.... Last Show: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, I think. Not the new season, some of the older stuff. I don't watch a lot of tv tbh :P Currently Reading: The Brothers Karamazov, by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, and it's taking me forever. I really like it though! Current Obsession: ... ... Man, I don't even know. Feels like it's been a while since I had a proper obsession going :( Last one might have been Creatures, which was like a year ago? I got back into it all of a sudden and went on a cobbing spree; I made these neat "Smashing Honey Pots" that start out as a honey pot, and then once depleted became smashing jugs. I tag: @mellow-sandwich, @pinkcatmints, @dataframe-daze and @viriditys ... and sure, anyone else who sees this and wants to :)

[so-true-jestie]

Ok so. I already typed up the entire thing and then I closed it accidentally and everything was gone and now I'm retyping it. So. Prepare for a ride.

NT-Version:

Lovely, I liked it a lot, but bc I watched the Globe version a day before, I now feel like I can't appreciate the NT production as much as it should be.

What I liked and what tipped the scale in favour of NT (bc i really liked it better than Globe maan):

Benedick's and Beatrice's relationship. They felt more real to me - I could believe that they were in love (the Globe one... yea.. nah).

They were also incredibly human, which was lovely to see. I liked both actors. Benedick's journey was great to watch and seeing Beatrice be vulnerable was touching, too.

Also, the scene where Benedick was eavesdropping to Don Pedro and co. was hilarious - I think the entire theatre was howling with laughter. (Ice cream (cones) play an important part, that much I'll say)

There were also many little details sprinkled in which where nice to discover.

I also enjoyed Hero's characterisation; she was more confident than I'd ever seen her.

But the person I remember most is Margret, which was a surprise to me. She was funny and sweet and her journey was so so great to watch - from first flirts to the night spent in hero's bedchamber to her being all witty was - dare I say it - a revelation of sorts. I had never seen her played quite like that before (and with such compassion for her character, too!). I feel like by watching this performance some things fell into place for me regarding her.

Memorable scenes I remember are eg the bath scene with Benedick and the parties (lush colours, bright costumes! Feathers! Swing&Jazz!!!).

I'd totally recommend watching it! I'll def rewatch it when it comes out on the nt at home website.

Also, I want to get some things off my chest regarding the 2022 Globe production:

I didn't like Beatrice&Benedick which is. Difficult to achieve to say the least. Also they were kinda forgettable (as were Claudio and Hero). Well, except for this one scene where Benedick said 'I can't get out of the plant pot', which lives in my head rent-free.

Don Pedro was a dilf. Do I remember correctly that he had his long hair in a messy bun all the time and when he proposed marriage to Betrice he dramatically opened it? And dramatically stared into the middle distance? And when she refused, he sheepishly put his hair up again? Lovely choice, 10/10, chef's kiss.

I liked the choice to let two scenes run parallel, but the food fight took me out of the story completely. I feel like food was such a rare and precious good in war times and after, wasting it for a food fight is a thoughtless choice to say the least? Even if it was supposed to signify new, carefree times... not a vibe tbh.

I loved Dogberry and Co., they were all lovely and some great choices (in regards to audience interaction, too) were made.

Also. Dogberry forgot part of his text and started scatting on the spot which is still hilarious to me. Even Leonata's actress broke character and looked at him confusedly, laughing and mouthing 'what??'.

Which kind of brings me to my favourite. The star of the evening for me.

Antonia.

She was . So. GOOD.

She made every correct choice and then took her performance up a notch again.

She was silly and loving, despairing and furious. It was a joy to watch her and I know I'll rewatch this version for her and her alone.

... ok! Hope I could give you an impression of the NT-Much Ado production!! Have a lovely day! :)

YES this was such a treat and then some!!!!

for the NT version, i will say: i saw clips of the ice cream and bath scenes and they were comedic gold. i only wish i'd seen Benedick at the end of the ice cream scene and during the "against my will i am sent to bid you" bit, cause those parts always get me in any production.

(also i would kill for Vulnerable Beatrice and Confident Hero. i love them. and i am looking forward to seeing Revelatory Margaret, i do think she's interesting and you could play her with quite a bit of depth if you made the effort to understand her. i should get on that.)

as for Globe 2022:

i did think Benedick and Claudio could've been better — Beatrice stood out for me because Lucy Phelps is generally magnetic, and i thought Hero was pretty spunky, which remains a relatively new take. and yeah, i remember the plant pot bit, because my view was obscured by that potted plant for the entirety of the show. didn't Beatrice get stuck in the badminton net though? credit where credit is due.

you are absolutely spot on that Don Pedro was a DILF and about his hair. that was super fun. unfortunately i don't remember much of the rest of his performance (like when he aided and abetted Claudio in his Crimes). as for the food fight, i honestly mostly watched it in confusion. it felt... surreal. like a dreamscape. renaissance painting come to life.

you liked Antonia! that's an interesting choice!!! looking back i have to say, yeah, that lady could do no wrong. in a show where the mains were on the meh side (sorry babes), i think we got some solid supporting characters in this one. i'm usually a fan of the prods that replace Antonio with Innogen, but the combination of Leonata and Antonia was... interesting. i wonder if it compromised on the emphasis on patriarchal societal structures in MAAN, though. i wonder.

i will love you forever, anon, thanks for this.

[tsuki-sennin]

Having grown to appreciate her unusually kind form of selfishness, Gira propositions the exceptional Queen Himeno for aid in his crusade in the aftermath of the battle at Ishabana's capital of Flopital. However, before she is able to treat the wounded in the castle, Kuwagon signals the arrival of a newcomer. The silver and gold God Kabuto, who fires upon the King-Ohgers. Yanma, Himeno, and Gira are swept away by Kuwagon's rescue, and God Kabuto pursues them...

So the story goes! Anyways, let's get back to that now, Spoilers, I guess~!

-Oh fuck, he's one of the big boys.

-Wow, that reformation was

-Instant, holy crap.

-Aaaaaaand, they're down! Booooosh!

-Oooooh

-There he is, Kaguragi the bee man.

-His facial expressions are equal parts hiliarious and terrifying.

-Since female bees of all are the ones with stingers, this implies to me that he has T-masc swag, so I think I'm incorporating that into my headcanon. Entirely independently, mind you.

-Anyhoo, I'm now listening to Zenryoku King for the tenth time today.

-Aaaaah~!

-What a lovely place, Toufu is.

-I love seeing Toei go through all these typical high fantasy JRPG settings, it gives me joy.

-I think the one recurring bit they don't do is try to claim the whole setting as just one continent.

-I've gotta ask, does Sebastian get paid? Y'know, a lot?

-I suppose Himeno skipped her bible study. ...can't say I blame her, tbh.

-Girl really said "I'm taking God for my collection."

-I just noticed this, but Yanma's headphones apparently aren't cat-ear ones.

-Ooooooh, remaking the divine in the form of modern industry. That's very thaumatech-y. Like Radiant Historia or uh... Fantasian, I've never played that one.

-Oooooh, grasshopper? I mean, of course there'd be one.

-...Ooooooh, what if there's a moth like Inazuman?

-Racles fucking cheated to wake it up somehow, didn't he?

-Oh okay, just leave Yanma there. Okay.

-Oh fuck, I didn't notice! Where is Gira?

-Good morning!

-Okay, goodbye... Kabutan!

-Kaguragi Jumpscare.

-"You..."

-I absolutely love So Kaku's voice.

-"Hail to the king, dude!"

-Kuroko! ...Oh wait, no, I'm not supposed to take note of you, uhhh...

-Daaaaamn, Kaguragi! You sure have a lot of... wheat!

-"Turning yourself in? Seems like kind of a bitch move."

-Oooooh, oooooh, ooooooh!

-"You! Are a very brave and wonderful man, tyrant boy!"

Gira: ...so like, do you have issues with Racules or- Kaguragi: He is nothing BUT an issue! He works his people to death, attempted to wrest control of my nation's god, withholds his industrial innovations from my subjects... He even made fun of my ponytail by calling it a manbun, even though they're TOTALLY different!

-Ooooooh, funky!

-What a lively place.

-Must be nice to have.

-...wait, so there's more grain in Toufu than anywhere else in the world? ...guess the scale's a lot smaller than I thought.

-"This radish is is covered in dirt and bugs... my favorite~!"

-Wash your veggies before you eat 'em.

-There's God Hachi up there.

-Working hard to claim the fruits of thy labor! That is the Land of Toufu!

-"Sir Gira! ...let your best buddy in the whole wide world Lord Kaguragi handle this!"

-Alright, time to get it!

-Bonk!

-Man, I am just digging this soundtrack.

-Ohger Finish~!

-Aaaaand we've officially given up!

-"Could you like... give us time?"

-Well, he's given up.

-He has far too much drip to care what Racules thinks, Yanma.

-Guess the Shugoddamites still believe in their asshole king.

-...man, I miss Toufu's air already.

-"Shhh, shhh. There's the peasant Gira likes. ...Yeeeees, I look forward to seeing him prostrated before me."

-The Judge.

-There's Rita. There they be.

-"Well, that bitchass loser Racules doesn't wanna help me... which is why I must ask that you provide your aid!"

-"FOOOOOOD!"

-"Yanma, you fucker, keep your gross chopsticks out of the pot!"

-God this is so funny.

-The top of Tikyu's pecking order!

-"Pwease do it for our children!"

-Well, Gira's caught on.

-Slack jawed tanuki... Hey man, Keiwa'd be carrying you guys! ...more literally than anything, but.

-I love you Kaguragi.

-Here they come. The Bugnarak. In the quarry~!

-Fuck you, Dezzy.

-Tomato~!

-"Time for a bit of pesticide!"

-Hatch It!

-Ohgai Busou!

-Hachi Ohger!

-Yoooooooooo!

-Whoa, he's flexible!

-How bold of him.

-Bees. My God.

-This is amazing.

-Shugod Jumpscare.

-Using the lady as bait, smh Yanma

-Oh shit, there he is!

-"...That's not Racules."

-Kaguragi Dybowski. He cheated us all.

-God, this is epic.

-Well, he is giving Gira what he demanded at the start of the episode.

-"You little bitch!"

-Well, Gira sure was quick to forgive.

-Bug Kiss

-Good morning, Kabutan!

-Together!

-King-Ohger, come forth!

-I guess God Hachi picked up Kaguragi during that transition.

-God Papillon. Where's your Chief Justice, eh?

-King, King! King Ohger!

-Man, this dynamic's gonna be the best thing ever once Rita jumps in.

-Thank you, God Hachi.

-Ahhh, the old "attack the parts not covered by the shell" tutorial boss.

-Blown off the mountain.

-Bee Man did it.

-"Apology not accepted. Time to die, Bee Boy!"

-"No dying today."

-Man, Himeno really was about to relieve him of his head. She really is a mantis lady!

-Kaguragi has joined the party!

-"Hohohoho! Leave the scheming to the professionals, hmm? As for you, Sir Gira..."

-Oh wow, he sold them right out!

-Rita Time.

-Goddamn, they're on point.

-"Treachery, assault, attempted regicide, illegal trespassing, obstruction of justice, unlawful consumption of food... swagless behavior. By the power vested in me as Chief Justice of the International Court and Sovereign of Gokkan, I place you under arrest."

-Ohhhhh I've been waiting anxiously to see you, Your Honor.

[oliverpdaniel]

Advent of Code 2022: Days 1-5

Welcome back, party people, to Days 19-25 of the 2021 Advent of Code! Hmm, wait, no... Those are just items that have been sitting and going stale in my to-do list since last year, since I still can't figure out how to visualize rotating beacons or prioritize movements in a hallway. Grr. I've been doing lots of AoC problems in anticipation to keep my skills sharp, so hopefully I'll be approaching the 400-star club sooner rather than later™.

In seriousness, I could not be more amped to get this year's batch of puzzles underway. I am joined on my leaderboard this year not only by my roommate of yore, but a new friend, whom I've taken under my wing to help introduce them to the god-awful world of software development. I'm wishing her all the best in this year's challenge, and I can't wait for your Icarian hubris to melt like waxen wings after Day 10 or so.

These first few days proved more than trivial to solve. I have a new-and-improved workflow with VSCode, which means that I should be able to write about each solution immediately after getting that all-important gold star. Let's get right into it!

Day 1

Don't talk to me unless you're top 1000 on at least one day of AoC. I'd probably be even higher-ranked than #511 if I hadn't made a dumb slicing mistake. Looking forward to another exciting year of challenges, this time with friends!

Day 2

Well, that was absolutely embarrassing. I think this officially marks the end of my staying up to work on puzzles: as satisfying as it was getting another top-1000 finish for the first part (which should have been even faster, tbh), it took me entirely too long to finish the second part, because I kept rushing to submit rather than taking the two seconds to think things through. As I tried to solve while also preparing a pot of pasta and maintaining a phone conversation, I am somewhat reminded of this classic scene, although I really shouldn't be. Anyhow, morning solves it is from now on, even if I'm up at midnight.

UPDATE: While groggily making coffee in the morning, my roommate pointed out that, ALL THESE YEARS, I never realized that modulo worked with negative arguments as well, completing the symmetry of the circular list. ARRRRRRGH. Well, glad to know AoC has already proven educational.

Day 3

Despite telling myself that I was going to start going to bed before midnight and thus doing challenges in the morning, I did find myself awake at 12:10, though I hadn't even noticed the date change. Oh well, works for me. This challenge went much more according to plan: I quickly recognized what needed to be done, and my solution for both days worked first-try. Looks like sets and modular indices will be flavours of the month. (Hopefully not too many cellular automata or convolutions...)

Day 4

I was just barely awake at midnight, but I opened the puzzle and decided to go to bed anyway, which I think was very brave of me. The solution to part 1, which I more or less dreamed up, worked as expected: Python's chained comparator operations (a <= c <= d <= a) really are quite delightful. However, I had a little more trouble than expected figuring for any sort of overlap, so rather than have another day 2 situation, I took advantage of the megabytes of memory God gave me by porting both ranges to sets and checking for nonempty intersections. Once I had the right answer, I decided to amend my solution to include the "correct" way of doing it: there are planar intersection problems every year.

Day 5

Stacks! Honestly, the toughest conceptual part of this puzzle was parsing all the input. I wrote a bash command to create all the template files I need for the day -- test input, puzzle input, and solution script -- the latter of which includes a line to read in one of those files, break it into lines, and strip off trailing whitespace. That last step proved to be problematic today, as if a particular line of input, say, didn't contain any boxes in the first few columns, then I wouldn't have any way of knowing. Luckily, all the ~~procrastination~~ practice I did with previous years' puzzles mean that my cursed cursor-fu is top-tier, and I was able to bash out a line (first-try!) that automatically broke down each line into the correct tokens. Also different from most puzzle inputs, the file was broken down into three sections -- the stacks themselves, column names, and instructions. You could argue the second section isn't inherently useful (especially since I don't program in a language with static array lengths), but I did end up employing it just to make my life a little easier.

This puzzle is also the first time in a while I've meaningfully used a del statement in Python, since I was a newbie way back when. In this case, I used it in Part 2 to quickly lop off the last n values when I remove them from one stack and extend them onto another. I considered doing something similar for Part 1 in hopes of a minor speed-boost, but everything ran in, like, a millisecond anyway, so I didn't see much point.

One more thing...

As crypto culture (finally) crashes and burns around us, a new and ugly era rears its head: idiots thinking that "prompting" (i.e., writing inputs specific enough for GPT3 or similar to produce desired outcomes) is the future of programming/art/whatever, and is just as meaningful of a skill. Yes, sweetie, it's very impressive that a gigantic AI system was able to solve your AoC puzzle in 10 seconds after having consumed terabytes worth of other people's code, and yes, you pushed the button to make it go! And now your name is permanently on top of the leaderboard, because you think that you deserve all the credit for those solutions! Your family must be so proud of their little genius.

Yes, things like the AoC leaderboard aren't important in the grand scheme of things, and yes, it ultimately doesn't matter if it gets polluted with GPT solvers, because the rest of us still had fun and learned things working on the puzzles ourselves. But, if you truly believe that the ends justify the means (i.e., second-hand plagiarism on a supermassive scale), and the rest of us should just have to deal with the fact that you don't understand the concept of fair competition and should -- I don't know -- have to start a separate leaderboard with a human-verification system... you're not the future, you're the obstacle the rest of us have to get around to continue being a humanocentric society. I have no doubt that conversational AI systems like GPT are going to be here to stay, and the rest of the tech world is going to have to enter crunchtime to more effectively protect things like people's art from getting hoovered up by completely unattended systems. But hey, as long as you make a buck, I'm the idiot for not doing it first, right?

Anyway, all this to say, if you think it's cool that GPT-3 can solve programming puzzles just by reading a prompt, fantastic. I think it's awesome, and the possibilities are very exciting! Just wait fifteen goddamn minutes before submitting your solution. It's not cute, and as much as there aren't any rules to AoC, it's very clearly being done for the purpose of getting your username at the top of the leaderboard, not for 'raising awareness' or showcasing the power of AI everyone already knows is ridiculously powerful. It's for you and your ego.

Rant over; let's save Christmas.

[carpsurprise]

 ˗ˏˋ ´ˎ˗ flower shop!au sam ... !

→ gender neutral — (they/them pronouns)

→ notes: ok tbh, this is more of a home depot!au because it made more sense for a farmer. but he DOES mention making flower arrangements. give me a break. under a read more so i don’t clog the main tag. tell me if this is boring?? also i’m posting this to ao3. 

→ word count: 1.5k

The deep clinging of brass bells echoed above the farmer’s head as they entered the flower shop, already tinged with sweat on the back of their neck from the weight of the summer. Inside, a boy hunched over on a frail wooden stool sat on his console, his tongue poking out of the side of his mouth in unaltered concentration. The farmer idly wandered about the store, window shopping to see if any fertilizer would come to mind, or if a bird feeder they had dreamed of happened to appear. 

“Oh, hey! DIdn’t see ya come in, my bad!”

The farmer turned around, face-to-face with the boy from behind the counter. He was sweating, just as they were, a thick pink soaked into his cheeks and neck from working in the sun. The air conditioning was working over itself, whirring out in pained cries to fill the tiny shop with some solace from the outside air. 

“Don’t worry about it.” They smiled kindly. “I’m just looking around.”

He nodded, stepping back from them. His apron was an airy lavender, with the name ‘SAM’ written sloppily above the shallow pocket— thick lines and squiggles danced around his name in a joyous, child-like harmony. Gold stars lined up under his name, some peeling off from the mix of canvas fabric and sweat. The farmer had frequented the shop enough before to know that the employees were not rewarded with gold stars. Ignoring their odd realization, they returned their attention back to the lined shelves, stocked full and neat with fertilizers and bird seed.

“I can make arrangements, too, if you’re in the business for those,” he said, almost stuttering with urgency. The farmer looked at him, assuring him with another friendly smile. Their hopes that he would take this silent cue and step away had wilted. “I can get you one for free. Like, a free sample.”

“It’s okay, I’m really just here to look for some flower pots. I got a little distracted looking at these.”

Sam turned his head, allowing the almost pitiful way he tied his hair up off of his neck to finally be shown. The farmer could not even fault him, not with the way the heat had become near parasitic to the land. Even with the air conditioning roaring above them, the weight of the humidity had still managed to crawl into the shop. Excusing themselves, the farmer made their way to the outdoor section.

“Do you need me to show you where the pots are?” Sam called out, standing on the tips of his toes to see above the display stands.

The farmer turned to face him, waving their hand dismissively. “No, thank you! I’m fine,” they yelled back. “Thank you, though!”

They knew exactly where they needed to be: the spinning rack of seeds and the empty pots. Their time looking for seeds was short, immediately retrieving their learned (by trial and error, unfortunately) knowledge of what seeds would work with the amount of time they had left in the season. The shops’ assortment of pots had expanded since the last time they visited, all beautifully crafter and shaped in fun, different ways. 

Wanting some difference for their garden, they strayed from the terracotta pots and into the fancier ones. Even with tight funds, there was never a more opportune time to treat oneself than when buying plants. The glazed ceramic pots stood out against their company, shining in the sun with its finish and large size.

The farmer’s fingers gripped the lipped edges, spinning the pot around to look for any hidden scratches or gashes. Deciding the pot was beautiful as is, they pulled it out into the walkway further, bending down in preparation to lift it. Despite its hollow center, it carried the weight of solid brick. The soreness that accompanied them radiated in their lower back and arms, eliciting a wince and muffled groan from the back of their throat. 

After pushing a deep breath from their nose, their body still bent over the clay pot, they raised their head to peer into the dark windows of the flower shop. Sam was so floaty before their separation, following the farmer’s heels like a loyal dog— or a late-day shadow— and when they needed him most, he seemed to have vanished. His silhouette inside of the shop was pinpointed easily, with his spiked hair out of his small ponytail, towering in height, and in constant motion. Standing in front of him was a smaller shadow, holding up two bird feeders in their hands.

“Dammit,” the farmer cursed under their breath, recognizing the shape of one they held up. 

Feeling envious of another customer snagging what was supposed to become a treat for themself, they channeled their energy into their shoulders in one more attempt to lift the pot. A sharp pain pulsed in their shoulder once more. They rolled both shoulders forward and backward, looking back into the shop for any hope to catch Sam and flag him down.

Sam’s saving grace had appeared after a few minutes, his head poking out from the shop door. “Hey, they, are you still doing alright out here?”

The farmer’s head lifted, snapped up as if they had been dozing off, beaded with sweat and red in the face. He caught on with an immediate rush, breaching himself into the sun and over to the pot anchored in front of the farmer’s feet. His legs separated from each other, ready to brace the weight of solid clay, just before he paused— with his hand held up to his customer— before letting out a sudden sneeze into his elbow.

Their eyebrows furrowed for a split second, before regaining their composure. “Bless you.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” Sam responded, lowering himself to cradle the curves of the pot, lifting it and suspending the weight onto the center of his stomach. The farmer jogged before him, holding the door open for him as they returned to the haven of the shop. He thanked them in a strained voice, before continuing to speak. “I’m just allergic to flowers.”

They looked at him carefully, admiring the curves of his face. “Why do you work at a flower shop if you’re allergic to flowers?”

He muttered something under his breath, carefully setting the pot against the counter before dropping it with a thud, retracting his bony fingers quickly. The counter shook under the force of the drop, and Sam hurried himself back to the register with a shaky smile. “I just think they’re pretty cool.”

“Yeah,” the farmer responded simply, looking at the finish on their new pot with a blank look. “I guess so.”

“And my mom really likes them,” he added. 

Picking up the price scanner, he splayed his hands around the curve of the pot, spinning it around. After scanning the same seed packet a few times, he started poking at the buttons of the cash register. The farmer, left to their own devices in their patient waiting, had peeked around the store, looking for any one object to jump out at them— scream their importance— or jog their memory of any forgotten needs. A hanging pot of vibrant red flowers had caught their wandering eye. The bulbs nearly spilled over the sides, vibrant and full of life.

Biting back a surprised gasp, the farmer lifted their finger up to Sam. “So sorry, just give me one moment!” 

Hurrying themself over towards the flowers, they carefully lifted the plastic hook from its hanging home and supported the weight with an opposite hand placed gently underneath it. They returned to Sam’s counter, placing them with the utmost tender care of a gardener. Sam raised his head from the register, looked to the flowers curiously, then back to the farmer. His hand cradled the tag, his eyes scanning across their scientific name in a small, italicized font, with the price and barcode just below it, and the sun bleached caring instructions. Letting go of the tag, Sam reached to grab a paper bag.

“That comes out to,” he paused, looking back at the screen, “seventeen gold.”

The farmer moved their hand to turn the price tag to verify the price.

“Don’t worry about that!” He grinned. “Those are on me.”

“Oh,” they cried out, moving their hand to touch one of the velvet petals. “Thank you so much, that’s so kind.”

Sam shook his head, handing their bag to them with a gentle hand. “I can help you get that out to your care, if you need me to.”

The farmer hummed, eyeing the deep blue of the pot before placing their bag inside of it, setting their new flowers on top. Hugging it awkwardly, they lifted it from the counter. While the pain in their back began to rip into their muscles, it was not nearly as agonizing as lifting from the ground. Sticking their head out from around the pot, they let a strained smile stretch across their face. “I got it, I think. Thank you, though.”

He smiled at them, still pink in the cheeks. “Anytime.” The farmer kept their grin, watching the pink of his face deepen into a reddish tone. “Come back to the shop soon.”

“I guess I’ll have to, huh?”

[smallblip]

Levi ends up regularly sitting in on the get-togethers between the old ladies in his and Hange's apartment as they knit and play cards. He's one of the gals.

More Levihan modern AU headcanons with your lovely prompts (y’all are geniuses I swear)💖💖💖💖💖

This is the AU where Levi and Hanji live in an area where it’s predominantly old people and they have a black lab named Bean. I love this neighbourhood. I love this AU😭:

Levi for sure gets asked to come sit when the old ladies who live in their neighbourhood come over for potluck and bridge. Hanji is so bad at bridge but she insists she’s getting better. Levi helps her out sometimes (“goddamn Hanji why are you still so shitty at this?”)- the old ladies allow for it because it’s cute and funny and they all have a laugh. If Levi’s not helping her, he’s crocheting/cross-stitching beside Hanji. The ladies teach him some of the more complex patterns. He’s pretty good at it.

He also sits really quiet and listens when the ladies trade gossip. Hanji loves stirring the pot. Hanji doesn’t know who they’re gossiping about but adds in lots of “oooohs” and “ahhhs”, asks them to elaborate, “oooh she sounds like a bitch!”, “how can he do that! Unacceptable!”. Levi secretly loves the drama even though him and Hanji aren’t personally invested.

The one story they ARE personally invested in however- a friend of a friend’s husband’s brother who had recently gone missing. His family found a stack of cash, gold, a gun, and wristwatches of varying sizes in his garage. Serial killer? International super spy? Who knows!

Bean hangs around the table because two of the ladies will sneak him some of their homemade meatballs. It’s a little competition between them and they’re each convinced Bean prefers their recipe. But he doesn’t discriminate. He just loves meatballs. Levi’s eye will twitch because that means Bean will be gassy all night. Stinky boy.

Bridge night is also when Hanji makes her famous pesto with basil from the community gardens. Hanji’s not so good at bridge, not the best at knitting (she’s able to replicate a pattern but kinda loses it when it comes to making anything more complicated than a scarf), but she’s really good at gardening. Like really good. She often has to give away produce because there’s just that much.

They’re pretty much the IT support/tech troubleshoot of the entire apartment complex. As mentioned, they live in a place that’s predominantly older people, that makes them the token young couple. So they get a lot of knocks on their door for computer/phone problems (“Alexa isn’t replying anymore. Is it her day off?”/ “my grandkids want to speak with me. How do I work a Zoom?”). Tbh Levi’s really shit with tech too, so if he answers the door he has to shout for Hanji. His expertise goes as far as changing the batteries in the remote control and force shutting a computer. The old people are always so thankful. Very often Hanji and Levi get introduced to the whole extended family on video call.

After work they sometimes go to this little Chinese hole in the wall (they often get takeout from there too). And the grandpa who owns the place always gives them free sides? And they’re always sides that aren’t even in the menu?! As a joke he calls Levi and Hanji his grandkids and as a joke they call him grandpa. Except it isn’t a joke anymore and their picture is on the wall with the rest of his grandkids’ photos.

[catbatart]

As a fellow hands-on, craft-loving dice goblin, I've admittedly been thinking about learning how to resin cast and make dice etc! I was just curious what your process/set up is, for your sets that you make?

I've heard you don't necessarily need a pressure pot, but that it's best for getting out any bubbles. Is this a piece of equipment you use, and if so, what brand do you recommend? Or where do you find your pigments for the resin?

Sorry for bombarding you with questions, I just think your crafts and skills are neat! ♥️

Ayy no worries! PRESSURE POT: I DO use a pressure pot. It was a huge investment for me for sure (the one I ended up getting was $330ish. Oof.) BUT! I didn't start off with one! The result was decent dice with lots of little bubbles on the surface of one side. Still workable as gifts for friends, though!

I'd recommend letting your resin sit for a couple minutes after you mix it so the bubbles come to the top. Then scrape them off or avoid them with your dropper or whatever!

MOLDS: The first set I bought were those cheap little ones from Etsy that were a ripoff of the Dispel Dice set (though I didn't realize it at the time.) They are a pain in the ass to work with, so if you can, I'd just jump straight to nicer molds. Sprue molds were a huge step up, but I hate sanding/polishing. Now, knowing what I know now, I probably would've jumped straight to slab molds, but sprue molds did me good for awhile. Good slab molds require a LOT less finishing. I'd recommend Werpy Dice (haven't tried their slab mold yet, but they have great stuff) And Druid Dice Shop. Both have done great sprue molds, but both recently released slab molds. I've used DDS's slab mold and it's my new favorite. I think it would probably be very useable without a pressure pot if you wanted! They're also great for inserts/additives and dirty pours!

PIGMENTS/INK: I can't recommend T-Rex ink enough. Decently priced with a great range, tbh. I've got a couple other random inks from different brands as well. I also have a small collection of glitter and mica powder that I've picked up from Michael's or etsy over time! It's kind of a slap-dash accumulation of additives. I already had gold and silver foil from art projects, so I've had a lot of fun with that! RESIN: I like Clearcast 7050 a LOT. HOWEVER! It turns purples and some pinks/reds into a muddy brownish color which is REALLY annoying and I ruined a LOT of dice that way. SO! I have a special supply of Art N Glow JUST for purple/pink dice. Just a heads up! I haven't tried many others though, so you may find something that works better! IN CONCLUSION: I've done a LOT of experimenting with products and molds, etc. I wish I'd known what I know now when I first started. It'd have saved me a lot of time and money. D: So I hope that this helps streamline that process for you!

Hope this helped!

[helloalycia]

my patient’s neighbour [two] // wanda maximoff

summary: as you spend more time with your patient's neighbour, you come to realise that your crush may be getting too much

warning/s: none, just fluff tbh

author's note: i’m so glad you guys enjoyed the first part! here’s the next bit :)

part one | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | masterlist | wattpad

When Sunday rolled around, I did everything in my power to make it the perfect day for Anna. We went out for breakfast at a café around the corner, a stroll around the park, then I made her lunch before she conked out afterwards, napping in her bedroom. I took that as my chance to decorate the living-area with birthday decorations. Nothing too much as I knew she'd kill me if I went overboard, but little things like a banner, some balloons and streamers.

I told Wanda to come at this time, too, and she showed up with a bag of groceries and a pretty smile on her face.

"Here, let me help," I said, already moving to take the bag off her. "How are you?"

"I'm good," she said, closing the door behind her and following me into the kitchen. Her smile widened when she saw the decorations. "Y/N, this is lovely! Anna is going to love it!"

"You think?" I asked, spinning around and doing a once over of the living-area. "It's not too much? I know she'll hate if I do too much."

"It's just the right amount," Wanda reassured, glancing at me. "How has she been today?"

We both began to unpack the groceries as we talked.

"Really good actually," I said with a nod. "I treated her to breakfast at that café she likes. We went to the park, fed the ducks, had a nice stroll. Then I made her some lunch and she's napping which leaves us the perfect time to crack on with dinner."

Wanda chuckled. "Great." She paused, making me look to her to see her smile fading. Nervously, she asked, "Did her granddaughter call?"

I sighed quietly and Wanda seemed to know what that meant without me saying anything further. 

"It's okay, we'll just have to make this the best meal ever," she said, not letting it get to her.

"We will," I agreed, before looking to the food on the table. "So, chef. Where do we start?"

Wanda and I spent the next hour prepping dinner, a beef stew called Solyanka, as it would require two hours to cook on the stove so we were starting early to make sure it would be ready in time.

I was chopping some onions as she prepared the beef, but I couldn't help myself from glancing at her every two seconds, still filled with concern because of her cast and minor injuries.

"You should take a picture, it'll last longer," she said teasingly, making me look up to see her watching me with a stifled smile.

"Sorry," I mumbled, shaking my head and looking back to my chopping board.

"What's wrong?" she asked gently.

I chewed on my lip as I glanced at her wrist again, before meeting her gaze. "How did it happen?"

"I already told you," she reminded me playfully, trying to lighten the mood, but I was still fretful. "It happened on a mission."

"Yeah, but how?" I asked again, hoping she understood what I meant.

She seemed reluctant to share, face scrunching up with thought, before looking down to her own chopping board. I thought she wouldn't tell me, but then she spoke.

"I can't tell you too much," she started, shrugging, "since it was a confidential mission. But basically, I was undercover when my target recognised me and we got into a fight."

Watching her with the utmost attention, I nodded, imagining it in my head.

"It wasn't difficult or anything, but it surprised me, y'know?" She looked to me with a smile, as if trying to make it sound less scarier than it was. "The guy, the target, he managed to get in few good hits. And he sprained my wrist. But it's alright."

I wasn't as amused as she was, wincing at the thought of her being in a fight. "Are you sure you're alright?"

She tilted her head knowingly. "I'm sure, Y/N. It's my job."

Shaking my head, I looked back down to my chopping board and continued chopping the onion. "I don't know how you can do that as a job..."

"Well, it's rewarding," she said like it was obvious. "Why do you spend most of your week caring for the elderly?"

"It's rewarding," I said without hesitation, before realising what she'd done and looking her way.

She was smiling cockily, making me roll my eyes and laugh.

"Okay, I see your point," I gave in. "But still. It's a dangerous job what you do. Just be careful, yeah?"

"Always am," she promised. And I wanted to believe her, but the cast on her wrist said otherwise.

—

"It smells like home, devochki, spasibo (girls, thank you)," Anna said from her place at the table. "Are you sure you don't want me to help?"

"We're sure, Anna," Wanda called back to her. "I'm just putting the food into a serving bowl and Y/N is grabbing some glasses. You sit and wait like the patient woman I know you are."

Anna mumbled something in Russian which I didn't understand, but it seemed to make Wanda chuckle as she rolled her eyes.

It was finally time for dinner and the stew had turned out beautifully, not that I had doubts since Wanda didn't seem like one to kid around with cooking.

As she was readying it for the table, I was setting everything up and all that was left were the glasses. But, of course (and oddly enough, since Anna was shorter than I), they were stored on the top shelf of the kitchen cupboard and just out of my reach.

In hindsight, I probably could have grabbed a stool and stood on it, but I was too lazy, so I went on my tip-toes and stretched with all my might. The tips of my fingers brushed against a glass and I attempted to move it towards me, unable to see if I was actually doing anything since it was too high. After a couple of tries, I managed to bring it forward, but my stupid self flicked it too hard and it came tumbling off the shelf and towards the counter.

I braced myself for the sound of glass smashing, but instead, a wondrous red energy wrapped itself around the glass and kept it suspended mid-fall.

"Very clever," Wanda said sarcastically, appearing directly beside me. Her accent was daringly teasing.

I looked up and saw her smirking at me with amusement, right hand raised and aimed at the glass. Red tendrils of energy glowed around her hand and the glass; I widened my eyes a little, amazed at how easy she made it look. Though I knew she had powers, I'd never actually seen her use them up close and personal. It was stunning.

"I totally knew you were going to do that," I played it cool, cheeks flushing as she set the glass on the counter.

"Mhm, sure you did," she played along with a melodious laugh, before pressing her front to my back without warning and reaching to grab two more glasses. "Here, I got it."

My body tensed at the feeling of her unexpectedly so close to me. My mouth went dry, her warmth emanating from her and washing over me with the scent of her perfume. Did she always smell so good?

When she grabbed all three glasses, she didn't seem to notice the effect she had on me (unless she did and kept quiet for her own amusement).

"Think you can grab the food without dropping it?" she asked, quirking an entertained brow.

Still distracted by her perfume, I nodded and cleared my throat. "Food. Right. Yeah."

As I stirred the stew to mix everything thoroughly, I felt my heart rate return to its normal pace and told myself to chill out. Wanda just happened to be an extremely pretty individual who was kind and thoughtful and funny. It wasn't a big deal.

When I was sure I wouldn't make a fool of myself, I returned to the dining table with a pot of stew and set it down on the placemat.

"Priyatnogo appetita (enjoy your meal)," I said, trying not to stumble over my pronunciation. 

Both Anna and Wanda raised their brows with matching surprised smiles on their faces.

"You said that perfectly, Y/N!" Wanda said encouragingly, as I took a seat to the right of Anna at the head of the table.

"I see you've been practicing," Anna added, looking to me with an endearing gaze. "A present in itself. Thank you, milaya (sweetie)."

I smiled bashfully. "I have to keep up with you both somehow, right?"

Anna chuckled as Wanda gave me a brilliant smile. Something in my chest stirred as she did, and I was forced to look away, though my own smile didn't fade.

"So, Y/N and I put this together for you and I'm sure you'll know what it is," Wanda said, before serving up a bowl for Anna.

"Solyanka," Anna exclaimed with delight. "Devushki (girls), this looks and smells amazing." She paused, glancing between us both with a grateful smile. "Since you've both been here, this place... it's beginning to feel alive again."

To my surprise, she teared up and began to laugh, using her napkin to pat the corner of her eyes. I rested my hand on hers, squeezing it gently and giving her a small smile.

"I appreciate this very much," she continued, before squeezing my hand and letting go to grab her spoon. "I can't wait to try it."

The three of us dug into our stew and Anna loved it, talking about the first time she ever had it as a kid and how it was one of her favourite dishes. The rest of the meal went by wonderfully, with Anna looking as happy as ever and Wanda listening to her intently. I was listening, too, but my gaze did end up wandering to Wanda as she sat there animatedly, nodding along and smiling to Anna.

For some reason, she was ethereal tonight, though she looked like she always did. Her long brown hair was tied up in a ponytail and she wore a loose tee shirt over some jeans. Nothing fancy, but she pulled it off so well. Rings adorned her fingers as she played with them thoughtlessly, and it caught my eye before I got distracted by her cast on her left wrist.

She'd said she was okay, but it still worried me. It wasn't my right to worry, but she was my friend. I was concerned. She could take care of herself, but that wouldn't put the ache in my heart at ease.

As if she could hear my concerns, her eyes flickered to mine, a kaleidoscope of blue, green and gold. She sent me a reassuring glance before looking back to Anna with focus. I chewed on my lower lip, trying not to let my worry get the best of me, before looking back to Anna.

Towards the end of the meal, after we'd eaten and were merely conversing, Anna's landline rang in the apartment.

"I'll get it," Wanda said, already standing up to grab the phone from its cradle.

Anna and I watched as she answered the phone with a friendly 'hello', before a surprised expression appeared on her face.

"Sure, I'll pass it on now," Wanda was saying before approaching the table and stopping by Anna. Her expression softened as she said to Anna, "It's Sasha."

Anna's expression fell at the mention of her granddaughter. She nodded slightly, before standing up and grabbing her cane to balance. Accepting the phone, she began to walk away into her bedroom. Wanda and I heard her say a faint 'hello' before she closed the door behind her.

"Her granddaughter rang?" I asked with mild disbelief.

"It is her birthday," Wanda pointed out, returning to her seat.

"Bit late into the day though, isn't it?" I retorted, pulling a face. "Almost like the day is over, in fact."

"Sounding a little judgemental there, Y/N," Wanda teased, leaning forward into the palm of her hands and watching me.

"I'm not," I said with an eye roll. "I just think she should show her grandmother some respect. Who does she think she is?"

I paused as Wanda gave me a knowing look, then winced.

"Okay, I heard it that time," I admitted, making her laugh.

"I get it," she said, nodding slightly. "Maybe she's finally starting to realise though."

I sighed, leaning back in my seat. "I guess... For Anna's sake, I hope so."

Wanda and I talked amongst ourselves until Anna returned silently, hushing our conversation. She returned the phone to its cradle before taking a seat at the head of the table. Wanda and I exchanged looks before I decided to speak, noticing Anna wouldn't.

"Is Sasha doing okay?" I asked gently.

Anna was staring ahead, barely listening, before she glanced at me then looked down to her empty bowl. Sentences left her lips in Russian, mumbled and incoherent, at least to me. Wanda leaned forward, holding her hand and frowning with sympathy as she listened to her words. I felt horrible, sensing something was wrong, but unable to do anything to help.

"I'm sorry, Anna, I didn't mean to upset you," I said, shaking my head.

Wanda met my gaze. "It's not your fault... Anna just misses Sasha."

I frowned. "Oh."

"But I'm glad I have you both," Anna finally spoke, accent thick with emotion, as she looked between us before settling her eyes to me. "Even if you're paid to be here."

She cracked a smile, making my shoulders relax. I returned her expression, glad she still had a sense of humour.

Anna didn't mention Sasha's name for the rest of the evening. We cleaned up, had some tea, played a quick board game before I made sure she was okay for the night.

"She alright?" Wanda asked when I closed Anna's bedroom door and stepped into the hall.

"Yeah, she's tired from all of today's excitement," I said with a smile.

"So are you by the sounds of it," she joked, but stepped forward to rest a hand on my arm. "I think we should call it a night."

"I think we should," I said in agreement.

After grabbing my stuff, Wanda and I left the flat before walking to her apartment and stopping outside.

"Thanks for helping me out today," I told her with a tired smile. "I really appreciated it."

"Well, you asked so nicely... how could I resist?" she said, staring up at me through her eyelashes. I rolled my eyes playfully, making her smile. "I had fun. Thanks for inviting me."

I was going to respond, but a yawn escaped my lips, prompting me to cover my mouth as I did.

"Sorry," I said, trying to blink the fatigue away momentarily.

She chuckled, tilting her head and watching me carefully. "You're cute."

I breathed out through my nose, unsure what to say to her words, but I definitely felt my heart rate speed up a little.

"I'll let you go," she said, clearly entertained by my silence. "Get home safe, yeah?"

"And you look after yourself when saving the world, yeah?" I replied with a quirked brow, eyes glancing at her wrist.

"I promise." She grinned before moving forward to hug me.

I returned the hug, the smell of her perfume permanent in my nose by now, before pulling away with a final smile. Of course, I probably shouldn't have stared at her lips so intensely, wanting nothing more than to kiss them.

"See you tomorrow," I said, snapping back into reality and taking a step back. "Goodnight, Wanda."

"Goodnight," she said sweetly.

I turned to leave and was suddenly wide awake. Did I just think about kissing Wanda?

—

It was a few visits later when I was caring for Anna and she decided to have a dance around the living room. One minute we were flicking through different radio stations, and the next she was putting on some old records on her record player. She settled on an upbeat, 50s dance song, the music filling the apartment with joy.

"Egor and I danced to this very song when we first met," she told me, talking about her late husband with a twinkling passion in her eyes. "It was a party and he had been staring at me all night, and I him. Then finally, when this song came on, he approached me and said, 'dorogaya, okazyvayesh' mne chest' tantsevat' so mnoy?'"

I suppressed a smile as I watched her reminisce. "And that means...?"

"'Darling, would you do me the honour of dancing with me'?" she repeated in English for my benefit.

My heart melted. "Anna, that's adorable. He sounds like such a gentlemen."

"He was," she said with a sigh of agreement, smiling to herself.

Whenever she talked about her husband, I'd never seen her look more content. The mere mention of his name was enough to put a smile on her face. I could only hope to have a love like theirs some day.

I stepped forward, putting out my hand. "I'm no Egor, but I'd love to dance with you if you'd let me."

"Oh, I can't do that," she said, waving my hand away. "I can barely walk, milaya (sweetie)."

"Hey, as your carer, I am insisting that you dance with me," I said, feigning sternness.

She hesitated, before resting her hand in mine and smiling with gratitude. The two of us danced together, myself being careful to keep her upright and make sure she didn't overexert herself. She was smiling and laughing as I spun her around, dancing her all around the living room, and it warmed my heart to see her so cheery.

A knock on the door caused me to excuse myself from Anna, only to find Wanda on the other end.

"Someone's in a good mood," she said instantly, taking note of my smile.

I stepped to the side to let her in. "Yeah, well, Anna is doing good today. It's contagious, what can I say?"

Before Wanda could respond, Anna called from the living-area with excitement.

"Wanda, idi syuda i potantsuy so mnoy!" she exclaimed, already grabbing Wanda's hand and pulling her in.

It didn't take a genius to know that Anna had basically asked Wanda to dance with her. I chuckled as I followed after them, enjoying the sight of Anna and Wanda dancing together.

"What's the occasion?" Wanda asked, glancing over the short woman and to me with a helpless smile.

"No occasion," I quipped, crossing my arms and trying to hold in my laughter at Anna's speed and perseverance with a reluctant Wanda. "Just having a good time."

Wanda looked like she wanted to retort with a comment, but Anna spun her around before she could, making me laugh aloud.

"Prikhodi odin, milaya (come on, sweetie)!" Anna said, holding out a hand. "Dance!"

Unable to resist, I joined in with the two Sokovian women, appreciating how happy Anna looked and how awkward Wanda felt in the situation. She wasn't much of a dancer, but she was trying and God was that adorable.

We danced for a little while longer until Anna's back began to hurt and she took a seat. Though, she insisted that Wanda and I resume with our dancing.

Just on time, like a sign from the universe or a higher being or whatever you wanted to believe in, a slow song came on next, filling the apartment soothingly.

To my surprise, the awkward dancer that was Wanda was oddly confident as she held out her hand to me.

"Would you do me the honour of dancing with me?" she asked softly, a small smile playing on her lips.

At the familiarity of her words, I glanced to Anna, who seemed to pick up on it, too. She said nothing as she watched us with a smile of her own.

"I'd love to," I said, looking back to Wanda's eyes.

They looked blue in the light, a beautiful sky blue that put me at ease as soon as I stared into them. I slipped my hand into hers, letting her pull us closer together as she rested her other hand on my waist, the touch sending shivers up my spine. I put mine on her shoulder, allowing her to take the lead.

It was the most intimate we'd been, and as she maintained eye contact, I wondered if she could feel my hands trembling slightly, or my heart hammering loudly, or my palms turning a little sweaty. She made me nervous in the best way possible, her smile dazzling without realising and her eyes piercing without meaning to be.

She must have felt it, too, that tug in the pit of her stomach that I was feeling now. Otherwise there was something seriously wrong and I was already too deep into a crush on my patient's neighbour.

When the song ended, it feeling like mere seconds in total, she let go of me and I missed the contact and the smell of her perfume and the way she was looking at me.

"Couldn't have done it better myself," Anna spoke, forcing me to tear my gaze from Wanda's lips. She smiled at me knowingly. "You ladies definitely know how to dance."

I felt a heat creeping up my neck as I smiled to myself, distracting myself with the laces on my shoes. When I finally brought myself to look up, I saw Wanda already looking my way, a calm expression on her face.

As she did most times she visited, Wanda stayed with me and Anna until I tucked Anna into bed and bid her a goodnight. We left the apartment and Wanda decided to walk me to the lift that evening, a distracted look on her face.

It was silent between us, a comfortable one, until the doors slid open and I looked to her with kind eyes.

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow," I told her, making her look to me. "Have a nice evening, Wanda."

She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. I watched with amusement, wondering what was going on in that pretty head of hers. The lift doors began to shut, so I put my foot between them to keep them open.

"I should go," I said with an awkward laugh, before grabbing her hand and squeezing it gently since she wouldn't speak. "Goodnight."

When I turned to leave, I got, maybe, a step into the lift before I felt her fingers wrap around my wrist and tug me backwards, spinning me around. I didn't get chance to ask what was up as she stepped forward, pressing her lips to mine in an instant.

Startled, I froze at the contact, but then her hand rested on the back of my neck as her thumb caressed my jaw, and I found myself melting into her, closing my eyes at the blissful feeling.

Her other hand fell to my waist as she deepened the kiss, sending me into the lift and the wall hitting my back. I moved my lips in time with hers, revelling at how soft and delicate and gentle she was being. Kissing Wanda Maximoff wasn't something I had realised would be this good, but now that I was, I never wanted to stop.

Unfortunately, the sound of the lift doors shutting pulled us apart. I was breathless, my heart racing and my lips swollen from her spectacular kiss.

"I've wanted to do that for such a long time," she revealed, stepping back a little. Her eyes were bright and her cheeks were flushed as she watched me with mild concern. "I completely should have asked though. I'm sorry that I overstepped."

She pursed her lips, forefinger and thumb pinching her bottom lip regretfully and gaze falling to the floor.

"You didn't overstep," I said, already missing the sensation of her lips against mine. "You stepped just the right amount."

She looked back up, eyes softening as her lips curved into a radiant smile.

"You wanna, maybe, do that again?" I asked without thinking, my mind a haze as Wanda still remained so close to me.

She laughed melodiously before raising her hand and cupping my cheek. Her eyes looked between mine before falling to my lips affectionately.

"I'd love to, dorogoy (darling)."

I smiled toothlessly before closing the gap between us, secretly wishing this lift ride would go on forever if it meant I could kiss Wanda like this.

—

After making out with Wanda in the lift, she asked me out on a date and it was the best date I'd ever been on. Nothing over the top but very thoughtful as she took me for a picnic in the park before getting ice cream for dessert.

We went on a few more dates after that, taking turns to take the lead with them, and she ended up asking me to be her girlfriend which of course I said yes to.

All whilst this was going on, I still cared for Anna and Wanda paid her visits when she could, though we tried to remain as normal as possible. We didn't think it was best to tell Anna that we were together since we didn't want to startle her or make her feel uncomfortable in our presence. Of course, keeping a secret from Anna is as good as nothing when she had eyes like a hawk.

Wanda and I were putting a plate of tea and biscuits together for Anna one day, myself lining up the biscuits neatly as Wanda lingered beside me. She was about to grab a biscuit from the plate when I smacked her hand away.

"Just one," she pleaded, but I shook my head before nodding to the packet on the side.

"Help yourself to those," I told her condescendingly. "These are for Anna."

"Just get her another," she said simply, before reaching over again.

I smacked her hand away again, giving her a knowing look.

"Y/N!"

"Wanda!" I mirrored her childish smile.

She narrowed her eyes petulantly. "Are you seriously doing this right now?"

"Are you?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

She pouted and I so badly wanted to lean forward and kiss it away, but Anna was sat on her recliner behind us. Wanda seemed to know this as a mischievous smile fell on her lips, eyes watching me carefully.

"You're not cute," I mumbled, before grabbing the tray and turning to leave. As I was walking to Anna, a biscuit began to float off the plate, red wisps of energy wrapped around it and bringing it to– "Wanda!"

She laughed, eyes glowing red with magic, before grabbing the biscuit from mid-air and taking a bite.

"Such a child," I said under my breath before setting the tray on the coffee table before Anna. Smiling at her, I said, "Here you go, Anna. Do you want anything else?"

As I straightened up, flipping Wanda off behind my back and encouraging her laughter further, I noticed the way Anna looked between us both curiously.

"Everything okay?" I asked, eyebrows knitting together as she continued to study us both.

"Something happened," she decided. "Between you both."

"What do you mean?" I asked, taking a seat on the couch. "Nothing happened."

"Something definitely did," she said knowingly. "I may be old, milaya (sweetie), but I have very good eyes."

"Anna, what are you talking about?" Wanda played dumb, taking a seat beside me, biscuit in hand.

"Don't think I haven't seen the way you two steal glances when you think I'm not looking," she said, pointing between us. "Or the way you," her finger settled on Wanda, "have been helping Y/N out more often than usual."

Wanda and I flushed, embarrassed that we'd been caught out. I was so certain that we'd successfully hid it from her, but clearly we were mistaken.

"We wanted to tell you," Wanda began, cheeks still pink as she leaned forward.

Anna silenced her with a wave of her hand. "Save it. I knew I was right. You two are together."

Pursing my lips, I waited for her to say something because I wasn't really sure what to say myself. Suddenly, a smile appeared on her lips.

"I'm very happy for you both," she said to us. "Wanda here always needed somebody in her life who wasn't me. And you, Y/N, are the perfect match for her."

I chuckled, looking to the girl in question, whose face was as red as her powers that she used to torment me with. I grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently, and nudged her in the shoulder.

"You hear that? Perfect match," I teased, making her roll her eyes to distract from her flustered self.

Anna said something to her in Russian, way too fast and incomprehensible for me to understand, even with the extra effort I was making to learn it. Whatever it was, it made Wanda get even more embarrassed, her green eyes darting around the room in an effort to overcome it.

"What did you say?" I asked Anna with amusement.

"Oh, nothing Wanda hasn't heard before," she said dismissively. "It's all okay. Isn't it, Wanda?"

"Yeah," Wanda mumbled.

"I don't know what's happening here, but I'm all for someone putting Wanda in her place," I said, looking between them both with an entertained smile.

Anna chuckled as Wanda shoved me in the arm gently before pulling me close again. I smiled at how cute she looked, pink blush creeping up her neck and teeth chewing on her lower lip to contain her smile.

I'd never get sick of the sight.