#I really gotta be careful when I listen to him now he's always punching me right in the heart
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humanculi · 7 months ago
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"Halcyon & On" by Orbital, remixed by Jon Hopkins.
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normansnt · 9 months ago
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Knight in shining armor
(Hazbin Adam x singer!male reader)
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(Not my art, idk whose sorry I got it from pinterest but credits to the artist cuz he would SO wear that I cant😭)
Warnings: fist fight
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"FUCK YEAAHHHHHH THATS MY BOYFRIEND MF" yelled Adam to a random person at your concert.
He always did that. Whenever he went to one of your concerts (always, I am not kidding the man has not missed a single one) he yelled to every one of your songs because he knew them inside out and after each song he yelled to someone that you're his boyfriend.
It was sweet in your eyes he was truly your number one fan. However on more than one occasion this has gotten out of hand. Like right now.
Sometimes people get annoyed at his yelling even though it is a rock concert he is still the loudest one. But this time it was different. This time something happened that actually bothered him.
He was yelling about how much he loves you and how you are his boyfriend again when he overheard something that he didn't like.
"For real? That gorgeous singer is dating that flop no fucking way."
"I know right? I gotta say I wouldn't mind hearing the singers voice moaning my-" Adam didn't wait longer to hear the end of the sentence he straight on punched that guy.
"I fucking DARE you to finish that sentence." Adam literally growled. Even though this was heaven, assholes were present here too.
The fight got so big that you had to stop your performance and stop it.
"Adam- Adam stop" you tried to get your boyfriend off of the two guys who he was now fighting.
"Let me go babe, I'm gonna fucking murder those two mother fuckers-"
"Adam, they already had enough you won." You tried arguing with him while you dragged him to your dressing room. The two guys laying on the floor beaten to pulp.
Once you closed the door, the ruckus outside got just a bit quieter and you could finally take a deep breath.
"What happened this time?" You asked your boyfriend while getting the first aid kit and patching him up. He was much better of than the other guys thats true. But he still had some scratches and a black eye.
Adam told you the whole story of what happened and you listened intently while gently putting some alcohol at a deep cut on his nose.
"And then I was like- aww fuck babe warn me next time" he started whining because of the alcohol.
You sighed.
"Listen Adam, I appreciate what you did, those pigs said some disgusting shit and you were a great knight in shining armor but I worked really hard to get this gig and you know that" you said trying to be as gentle as possible.
"Babe, your boyfriend is the fucking Adam, tell me where you want to preform and you'll get in within seconds I can take care of that."
"I know Adam but I really wanna accomplish some things on my own." You sighed again.
Adam knew he fucked up, he sees first hand how much work you put into your music. But he just couldn't help it this is the kind of thing that pisses him off to no end. His first two wives left him for someone else and even though he might act confident he was terrified that you would leave him, too. He didn't want to loose someone he loved so much.
You put your hand on his cheek and made him look at you.
"Hey, its ok I understand." Thats all you needed to say. You knew about Lilith and Eve leaving him. And you knew how insecure he actually felt. You have been dating for almost 6 years now you knew him way too well.
You kissed him to let him know that you weren't mad. He kissed back with enthusiasm, he loved kissing you. It might be true that he has kissed a lot of people before you came along but he always said that you were his favorite kisser of all time. He just loved the feeling of your lips against his.
"(Y/N)...I- listen I mean what I said really, wherever you wanna play I can hook you up."
You chuckled lightly. You knew this was the closest thing you are gonna get out of him as an apology, the man was not good at apologizing. But you already knew that, and loved him nonetheless.
"I know honey I know." You put your forehead on his.
The wholesome moment was interrupted when you both started hearing chanting from outside.
"Is that-?"
"THEY ARE CHANTING YOUR NAME BABY COME ON GET YOUR BRETTY ASS OUT THERE"
And there he was again, your stupid boyfriend.
You laughed an snatched up your guitar.
"All right baby you wanna watch from back stage?" You asked back as you held out your hand to him.
"FUCK YEAAHH"
And with that you two walked out of your dressing room laughing.
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HE IS JUST A STUPID LITTLE MEN HELP I LOVE HIM SM IDK WHY😭😭
Hope you guys enjoyed😘~
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elderwisp · 9 days ago
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◁ || ▷
?: Listen skank.
Dan: God..?
?: I found a hair in my burger and I need you to refund it for me. Also make me another.
Dan: The hell you think you’re talkin’ to?
Kai: Hai.
Dan: Bitch! I thought you died! 
Kai: Nope, just life. Work. College. The usual.
Dan: Hmph. Let’s go sit.
Kai: Wait, aren’t you on the clock?
Dan: Yeah? Who gives a fuck? And if they do, I’ll punch ‘em.
Kai: DAN!
Dan: Meh, it doesn’t matter. I have news.
-
Kai: Holy shit, congrats!
Dan: It’ll be nice working near the bay. The company sounds pretty great too. 401k, free admission to the aquarium, and healthcare. First time in my life I’ve ever had that. Wild.
Kai: I’m happy for you! Who else knows?
Dan: Uh, just you, Frances and Atlas. I’ll probably tell the others at the record store soon. Gotta keep them up to date with the lore.
Kai: Ah. Have you told your dad?
Dan: No-uh. 
Kai: I see.
Dan: I want to tell him, I really do. 
Kai: So what’s stopping you?
Dan: Ugh, feelings. Don’t make me talk about them right now.
Kai: Fine! We can talk about something else.
Dan: Let’s talk about you.
Kai: Naur.
Dan: Si. Where’ve you been loca?
Kai: [ cackles ] I hate you!
Dan: I’m sorry! You seem so… Different. Confident, maybe? 
Kai: I didn’t realize. I dunno, a lot’s happened. 
Dan: Like?
Kai: I slept with someone. Well, multiple people, actually. Taryn knows I like men. About Atlas, too. Speaking of which, there’s no fixing that.
Dan: What the fuck.
Kai: [ chuckles ] I’m surprised you took all of this for confidence.
Dan: I mean, you seem to be holding up better than I expected.
Kai: I feel hollow, Dan. Like everything’s wrong but I gotta accept it.
Dan: You can change it. 
Kai: Maybe, but the way I left things with Alex-
Dan: Alex? Who?
Kai: He’s a good person and I… Took advantage of that.
Dan: What’d you do?
Kai: The night of the party. I told Atlas how I felt. Subconsciously I mean. It all sorta slipped out. I wasn’t really planning on it but he said some things. Well, we both said some nasty things. I was angry. He said that I knew nothing of compassion so I called Alex. I called him and I proved Atlas right. 
Dan: Kai…
Kai: I felt so ashamed after sleeping with him. Using him to mask the rejection I felt. He didn’t deserve that. I’m such a shitty person.
Dan: Don’t go there. 
Kai: It’s so hard not to.
Dan: So you made a mistake-
Kai: Several.
Dan: Everyone fucks up. There is not one person I’ve met that has done everything right. Look at our friend group. Complete mess but I’d like to think at the end of the day we’ve got each other. Regardless of flaws, it’s always been us. 
Kai: I miss it. All of us. Together.
Dan: I do too, but we’ve all got shit to sort out, yeah? Why not give yourself the space to do so as well.
Kai: Sure.
Dan: And stop calling yourself horrible, got that?
Kai: Maybe.
Dan: Bastard. 
Kai: How are you gonna tell me to be nice when you do this shit?
Dan: I never said I was perfect! Want me to grab you a milkshake? 
Kai: Hell no, you said you never clean it.
Dan: PFFT- Valid. I’ll grab you a soda.
Kai: Hey, wait.
Dan: What’s up?
Kai: Thank you for taking care of us.
Dan: Someone’s got to.
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orbitariums · 5 months ago
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rum punch | patrick zweig x black fem reader
writing this because patrick is definitely the type to text you like “if you wanna pull up just to get fucked here’s the addy”
obsessed with this song right now (rump punch by cash cobain) and listened to it over and over while writing this. i recommend listening to compliment your reading experience 🙏🏾 it’s sooo challengers especially patrick zweig coded. let’s review: “top five nasty, you ain’t even gotta ask me” and “soon as you leave i miss u too, like damn”; “don’t be asking questions like a interview cuz you really know what we finna do”...  “i just made her cum twice you ain’t make her cum once”?!!>!##? that’s patrick DOWN. sorry it must be said… 
so a little drabble-ish thing is ahead! contains: cheating (ooops), degradation, smut
it started when you started dating your current boyfriend, or at least that’s what you would tell yourselves to make you feel better about the whole ordeal — not that patrick cared much to begin with. but anybody who knew you and patrick knew that this had been going on for far longer than either of you would care to admit, or that either of you had enough introspective ability to even realize. every single playful shove, every time you squeezed his hand to deflect from parting at the end of a hangout, the way he’d stack his legs on top of yours while you were studying even though he knew you “hated” it, his thumb circling your hand, your head on his shoulder during a late night movie sesh with art and tashi, eyes fluttering closed until you found sleepy heaven in the perfect crevice of his neck. nearly every time you saw each other, which was frequent, you were touching without touching. art, who wasn’t one to make crass comments often, would always tell patrick: “it wouldn’t even make a difference, you should just go ahead and fuck each other. the shit you two do is more than just sex.”
it was 11:16 pm when you called him. your boyfriend had sped off in the middle of the night in a fit of anger after an intense argument about the same thing for the hundredth time. you were so tired. you’d been so close to texting or calling him before, but you refrained — you didn’t want things between the two of you to get messy when nothing in your life was going right in the first place. but now that you were nearly slumped against the wall with tears hot against your face, so tired beyond comprehension, you could blame it on the delirium brought on by exhaustion. you told yourself you just needed the comfort of your close friend, who always made you laugh.
“patrick, can i come over?” you’d asked, your voice trembling, your face buried in your sweater sleeve. 
patrick had never heard you sound so upset — he’d never even seen you cry. when you were around him, you were always so jovial and giggly. so when he heard your voice on the phone, so late at night, sounding so fragile and fractured, his eyebrows immediately knit together with concern, and he sat up on his couch. 
“yn, are you okay? is everything alright, you sound—”
“i’m fine,” you sniffled, breath catching on your voice multiple times. “just-just need a friend. please, can i come over?”
you couldn’t see it, but his features softened, and some wedge in his heart seemed to shift over,
“yeah. yeah, of course you can.”
he was so confused, but just glad to know that you were at least okay, taking pride in the fact that he was who you wanted to be around, whatever was going on. he made some rushed efforts to tidy up his bachelor apartment, sweeping crumbs under the rug, tucking in pillows on the couch, throwing yesterday’s takeout into the overflowing trashcan, and swiping the trash off his coffee table. 
he couldn’t believe how shrunken you looked when you appeared in front of his door that night, clad in an oversized stanford hoodie and sweatpants, slippers, tears still welling up in your eyes. this couldn’t be the same yn pushing him off of her with excessive force and maniacally cackling at his stupid jokes. 
“wh-”
before he could get a word out, you threw your arms around your waist, plopping your head down on his chest. he stilled for a moment out of shock, then relaxed into your touch, embracing you with his arms around your shoulders and down your back, holding you because he knew that’s what you needed right now. 
and then you were pulling away, sniffling and wiping away your tears, finally feeling some ounce of comfort now that you were with him. you knew, you knew, this was what you needed, as much as you had resisted this very thing. 
“it’s chris,” you said, moving past him and inside his apartment, groaning as you plunked down onto the couch. 
now, looking out the open door at the hallway ahead of him, patrick was nodding to himself silently, like he had come to some realization. he sat beside you, and you turned to him with a pout. and it was then that patrick knew he was not a good man for thinking about how pretty you looked with tears streaking your face and your lips pressed together in a girlish pout. 
“he’s like… intimidated by me or something. every single thing i tell him about my day, about work, about my friends, my wins… he’s always finding some thing to harp on like i’m some villain stopping him from achieving his finance bro dreams. he hates that i’m living my life because he isn’t living his yet. so every thing i earn, he just picks it apart and tears it down, questions my motives for everything.”
“he’s a dick, alright?” patrick said, in that ever so frank tone that you honestly missed, and wished you could hear during these arguments with your boyfriend. “yn, i’d never… we wouldn’t treat you like that, me and art and tashi. we’re your real friends, we celebrate you. that’s how a relationship’s supposed to go. he’s a stupid fuck.”
you grinned a bit at his correction, the corner of your lips turning up.
“i know you wouldn’t.”
“can i ask you something though, yn?”
“mhm?” you looked up at him with such innocent doe eyes that he didn’t want to call bullshit, but he was calling bullshit. 
“why… why’d you come over here? why not to tashi or your mom’s or… anyone else? why me?”
you sighed deeply, shaking your head,
“because, patrick, i… i just… want you right now.”
his face impossibly close to yours, intruding your senses and all your walls before you even realized they were up. 
“how do you want me?” he asked, his voice the softest it had ever been, his breath tickling your cheek. 
you were hoping you wouldn’t have to finish your sentence, and patrick knew it — his hands gripped the sides of your face with a stronghold, and then your lips were crashing against each other like a wave coming to the tide, foaming and sputtering and wetting the cracked sand at the shore. and it didn’t take long before you were climbing on top of him and straddling him, your clothes falling off one by one. his rough hand clutching your breast and squeezing, another in your panties navigating your clit like a fucking expert, making your back arch against the air. then your legs by your head as patrick drove himself into you, tender and slow and making you see stars instead of his face and the ceiling. fucking every tear out of you, turning your sobs of pain into sobs of pleasure. your moans were like a choir to him, licking flames against his earlobes each time you whimpered his name, leaving little half-circle imprints in his back with his nails. sweat dripping down his forehead as he clutched his eyes shut and tried not to come too fast, tried not to let the way you wrapped around him like a fucking snake— pussy squeezing his cock, legs trapping him inside you, hands roaming his back like new found land — make him lose focus. 
“fuck, your fucking moans. d’you have any idea how much i’ve thought about this? f- fuck, if you come to me crying again, i’m not gonna go so easy on you.”
if he had an ounce of self-respect, he’d have stopped you after the first time (he didn’t have the discipline to deny you completely), but something about him stirred at the unpredictable predictability of it all. he knew that at least once a week, you’d come crying to him over something your asshole boyfriend did to you, it was just a matter of what day of the week. 
he liked when you came over on friday nights most, because more often than not you’d stay the night, sometimes the weekend, making the excuse to your boyfriend that you were sleeping over at a girlfriend or your mother’s house. but really you were just spending the whole weekend getting fucked by your recovery boyfriend patrick, who would scrape up the little money he had to order food from your favorite thai restaurant every night and watch what were, in his opinion, the most insipid movies he’d ever seen — because he knew that less than halfway through you’d be split open on his cock, sobbing with pleasure into his shoulder as princess diaries became a distant echo in the background. his hand on the small of your back, his vision glazing over as he stares ahead at the tv, too enraptured by the sweet whimpers you make while you’re (attempting to) ride him, the sounds of your slick pussy swallowing him whole in slow intervals, panting and gasping as he speared you open because he was: “so big, patrick you’re so big.”
he’ll snap out of it then, find his hands wrapped around your waist and his lips buried in the crook of your neck,
“it’s okay, baby. you can take me.”
“i’m trying,” you wailed, the frustration so clear in your voice that it almost made him laugh. 
instead, he wrapped his hands around your waist firmly, leading you down onto his cock himself. 
“fuck!” you shouted out, practically collapsing forward onto him. “patrick, please—”
“if you can come to me crying just to get dick, you can take it.”
you gasped at the directness of his words, punching yourself for how much it turned you on. and he knew it too, by the way your pussy throbbed around his dick. you couldn’t see his face, but you could practically hear the shit-eating smirk in his voice as he grabbed your asscheek,
“yeah, your pussy loves it though. and you love being my little slut behind closed doors when your boyfriend isn’t acting right.”
you couldn’t control the moan that tumbled out of your lips when he said that, and definitely not the screech you let out when he started to thrust up, jackhammering into you so his cock reached the hilt. 
“that what you wanted?”
“yes, yes!” you wailed, nodding desperately, positively wrecked as your head practically hung over his shoulder, enveloped in a world of pleasure. 
“yeah… i know…”
and sometimes he won't be so nice. he'll be damn near using your pussy like a fleshlight, his body practically covering yours as he fucks you like an animal, hard and fast and rough, your pussy squelching around his cock each time he rams it into you. he'll use you like he's the one that needs comforting, like your pussy is the only safe haven he knows. and it's only fair, the way you hide out in his house and act like his dick is your life source. he fucks you like he's an athlete and this is his sport, tennis be damned. he'll degrade you anyway he knows how — because he knows you love it, knows it makes you finish two times as fast.
"he doesn't fuck you like this."
"you're such a fucking slut. come over here crying acting like you don't pull up just to get fucked." he'll laugh as he says this, and you want to smack his chest in indignation, but you can't manage anything but moans.
“you’re such a good girl. letting me use this pussy when i want.”
"there you go, squeeze my cock like it's yours."
"pussy's so greedy, getting fucked by the both of us. still so fucking tight."
"your boyfriend's probably wondering where you are." this has made you come twice now.
"whose pussy is it?" (and even though you have a man, you tell him it's his every time. sometimes he doesn't even need to ask, sometimes he fucks you so good that you just scream out: "it's your pussy — it's your pussy, daddy", and he'll chuckle and say: "i know.").
and you let him say these things and more, because he fucks you like no one ever has, like he knows something you told him in complete and total secrecy. like it's something so complex — but all it ever takes is one touch.
your friends have noticed something is different between you two, but it's honestly not a big jump from before — only this time, you guys sealed the deal and were actually fucking now. of course, patrick can't keep his mouth closed for long and ends up bragging to art, and you tell tashi because she's one of the girls, and now there's this unspoken understand between all of you. but no one feels the need to intervene, because honestly... it makes sense.
and you’ll have a conversation with him every other time, telling him “we have to stop doing this.” and one day he replies, 
“yn. not to be a dick or anything, but you’re the one who calls me. you act like you're coming over for comfort, but we both know it's my dick doing all the comforting."
and you know it’s true, you know patrick is right even if he is an asshole. but you won’t let that stop you from texting him: thai food and a movie? everytime your boyfriend fucks up. and patrick won't stop you either.
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catt-leya · 2 years ago
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I was wondering if you could do an enemies to lovers?? I’m so original, but maybe where they are on a run and get lose, and get into a huge fight because reader says they’re lost, but Rick is too stubborn to admit it:) plzzz and thank you!! Also love your posts btw, the bests toe curling pussy twisting smut I’ve read
Hurts So Good || Rick Grimes 18+ ❣Darker❣
Thank you so much for the request 💗 I LOVE enemies to lovers and I tried to make it up to you 💕
Soooo it's new for me to write Rick that way. Please look into my trigger warnings and I hope there are some people liking it 👉🏼👈🏼💗
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Trigger: cnc (?), gun play, breeding, degrading, sir kink, darker Rick yeah he's a warning and my usual smutty stuff
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You stuff a blanket in the trunk of the car and listen to your best friend talk about her new boyfriend. 
You love her to death, but since you arrived in Alexandria, she barely talks about anything but Spencer. Spencer this. Spencer that.
Somehow the two of them found each other and actually got together. That has changed your topics of conversation. 
So you grit your teeth and listen to the oh-so-awesome Spencer bring her a bouquet of flowers yesterday.
It's not that you're jealous or anything. 
No, you don't even feel like getting involved with a guy, but you just don't like Spencer and you let him feel that every time.
Now, though, you're a good friend and smile at her, "Sweetie, I gotta go."
Several times she blinks at you, as if she's forgotten why you packed some things in the car behind you, before sighing, "Oh yeah. How long is the run scheduled for?"
You shrug and lean your butt against the car, "I don't know. Rick wasn't sure how long we'd be on the road, so I packed a few things for several days and nights."
She nods slowly and you take a deep breath, "I don't even know where we are going."
You notice her glance sideways past you and know she's looking at Rick, who's a few feet away discussing something with Michonne.
Without looking at you, she says, "I'd really like to go with you."
Surprised, your eyebrows go up. Your best friend is not a person who likes to be out in the outside world. She likes the safety of Alexandria, and that's probably why she fell in love with Spencer.
When she looks at you again, she notices your gaze and shrugs, "Not that I necessarily want to fight walkers. I'm happy to leave that up to you. But I'd just like to see you in a little car with Rick, trying not to go for each other's throats."
You roll your eyes, but can't hold back a grin.
The fact is, you already like Rick just fine, it's just that your kind of 'friendship' is driving each other crazy. 
Much to the sake of everyone else. That's why it's better that it's just the two of you and you can pick each other apart in peace.
You're about to say something back when you hear Rick call out, "Are you done, sweetheart?"
Again you roll your eyes and smile at him sugary sweet, "Whenever you are, sugar bum."
The nickname Rick gave you at the very beginning gets on your nerves and he knows it very well, that's why he calls you by your real name extremely rarely and always teases you with his stupid 'sweetheart'.
The way he pronounces the word with his broad southern accent sometimes makes you blush unintentionally and to cover that you started to give him the strangest nicknames in between. 
As always, he doesn't seem to care and nods goodbye to Michonne, which is your sign to say goodbye to your friend as well.
She frowns, "Sugar bum?"
You bite your lower lip, "I couldn't think of anything else."
She doesn't respond for a moment, until she bursts out laughing, "Oh my God..."
Smiling, you pull her into your arms and murmur, "Take care of yourself" in her ear.
"You take care of yourself, too."
Before you let her go, she whispers softly, "You blushed again, honey. Watch out you don't start drooling if he calls you that again."
Gently, you punch her in the arm and hiss, "I won't."
As she looks you in the face, it feels like she knows more than you do and you have to avert your eyes.
Slowly, you walk around the car and climb into the passenger seat.
You'll have another quick glance at your friend as Rick opens the door to the driver's seat and drops into it.
Out of the corner of your eye, you see him push the sleeves of his blue shirt further up and then pull the door shut.
Without a word to you, he shifts into first gear and drives through the open gate.
You suppress a soft sigh and lean your head against the window beside you. 
For a long time you don't speak a word to each other and you think that Rick doesn't want to start a fight as long as you depend on each other beyond all measure.
After a few hours, you exchange positions and he calmly instructs you to follow the road until you come to the next intersection. When you ask him approximately how long that will take, he just mutters, "Long enough, sweetheart."
You stifle a comment that his answer is vague and start up.
Again and again you look over at him out of the corner of your eye and at some point his soft snoring enters your ear.
Unwillingly, you have to smile and now look at him properly.
His head is leaning against the window pane, like yours before, and his arms are crossed in front of his chest.
Although you can't see his eyes, you know they're exactly the same color as his shirt, and because he has those beautiful dark curls, his eyes always seem much brighter in the daylight.
You catch yourself thinking about him way too hard and jerk your head back around to look at the street. 
Again and again you repeat in your head: I don't care how beautiful his eyes are.
For some time you force yourself to look at the road, but eventually you weaken again and look back at the sleeping leader next to you.
He wrinkles his nose slightly in his sleep and you can't help but notice how soft and almost innocent he looks in his sleep. You could easily forget how many people he has already killed with his hands, looking at his soft features now.
Even with the grayish beard, he looks much younger in his sleep and as you catch yourself staring at his pink slightly parted lips, you mutter, "Holy shit."
It's not supposed to be that loud, but immediately Rick slams his eyes open growling, "What's wrong?"
Sleepily, he looks at you and frowns. All softness is gone from his features and you don't even realize you're still staring at him until he grumbles, "Look at the road and not at me."
The fact that he caught you staring at him by your own stupidity, makes you blush and you immediately look back at the road, "Sorry."
Now it's you who feels his gaze on you, praying that he'll just let it go, but hope is in vain, "What happened?"
"Nothing," your voice is a little too high and you hear Rick sigh softly, "Then why were you staring at me like that?"
His snotty question, makes you snap, "I wasn't staring at you, you dumbass."
"So did you strain your neck or what?" he teases. 
He knows for a fact that you were staring at him and now he's going to use it to drive you up the wall, which unfortunately works out just fine, "You were snoring so loud I wanted to make sure you weren't going to use it to attract walkers."
He snorts and you mentally pat yourself on the back.
You can finally get back to focusing on the track ahead of you.
You drive for what seems like an eternity on the road Rick told you about, then ask him, "Are you sure this is the right place? It doesn't look like there's anything here."
You've long since left the housing complexes and now there's nothing here but woods. Not even a small field where you could find crops is visible and you frown, "Rick?"
By the time you look to him, he's pulled out a map too and seeing his lost look, you groan, "You have no idea where we are."
His jaw tenses before he growls, "I know exactly where we are."
You spot a narrow path at the edge of the woods and pull off to stop, then turn in your seat to Rick, "Where are we, Sheriff?"
Vaguely he points to a spot on the map and you lean over to take a look at it too, "You don't think we're anywhere near Atlanta yourself, do you? We should have seen the skyline by now, Rick."
The forest he points to is close to the big city, and when you left Alexandria, you were going in the opposite direction.
But of course Rick wouldn't admit he has no idea which forest you're parked in, "The trees are just so tall we can't see the skyline."
You lean forward some more and your chest brushes his arm, "Why don't you just admit you have no idea where we are and let us out of this damn forest?"
He stiffens a little and then grumbles, "I know where we are."
You groan in annoyance, "Oh Rick." If your breasts weren't touching his upper arm, you wouldn't have even noticed, but he flinches as the words leave your mouth and immediately you blush.
You know what he must be thinking about and then you quickly say, "Swallow your pride and admit that you got us in deep shit."
Rick snorts and turns his head in your direction. 
Because you're still leaning so close to him, his face is suddenly way too close and you slide back into your seat as he growls, "Maybe it's your fault if I couldn't tell you 100% where we are right now."
You laugh out loud because he phrases it as if it's just a possibility and not a fact that he doesn't know what shitty forest you're hanging out in, "My fault? How so? YOU told me to take the road."
He throws the map in the back seat and looks at you with bright eyes, "I told you to go all the way to the intersection. It's not my fault you stared at me for half the drive and probably passed the intersection when you needed to catch your drool."
Staring at him in disbelief, you almost shriek, "You miserable asshole."
You yank open the car door and get out, because if you didn't, you'd rip Rick's head off. 
But instead of leaving you alone, he gets out too and you throw your arms up in the air, "How could I have ever gotten involved in going on a run with you?"
You go back and forth, "If we croak, it's your fault. Only your fault. You got that?"
Rick thrusts his hands on his hips and growls, "Sure, if it makes you happy."
Jerking, you look him in those ridiculously beautiful eyes, "Happy? You know what would make me happy?"
Your voice becomes shrill, "If I wasn't standing in the middle of nowhere with you."
You can see him struggling for self-control and clenching his hands into fists, "We. Are. Not. Lost." Every word is a growl and you turn your back on him, "I'll check the road for a sign so I know where we are if you're too proud for that."
You take a step and he demands, "You stay here."
Laughing in disbelief, you look at him over your shoulder, "Oh yeah? I'm certainly not taking orders from you now."
He takes a step toward you, "Stay here."
At his full height, he towers over you significantly and if he were to reach out, he could touch you. Challengingly you look at him, "Or what, Rick? What are you going to do if I just leave now and let you sit here, huh?"
Something you can't place flashes in his eyes and your eyes lock onto his Adam's apple as he swallows hard.
Suddenly your throat goes dry and instead of just going and leaving like you cockily announced, you stop in front of him and wait for his reaction.
You blame it on the adrenaline in your veins that you suddenly feel the need to reach out and put your hand on his chest. 
To feel his heartbeat beneath your palm.
Your body leans towards him, that's when you hear a crack in the bushes and before you can even react, Rick has already drawn his gun and is aiming at whatever should come out from between the trees.
Groaning, a lone walker emerges from the trees and when Rick doesn't lower his gun, you put your hand on the cold barrel of the gun and press it down a bit: "We can take him."
He doesn't quite lower the gun and looks down at you, breathing heavily.
You give him a weak smile, "Let me do that."
Gently you push the gun down even further and when he finally lowers it, you disengage from him and pull the knife on your thigh.
This one walker gives you no trouble and as he lies dead at your feet, you turn back to Rick who is watching you.
Still holding the gun, he looks to you and you clear your throat quietly, "What, you need to get something off your chest?"
The silence is cutting until he harshly demands, "Come here."
You raise your eyebrows in disbelief, "Haven't we been through this? I don't take orders from you."
His eyes don't leave you for a second as he lifts his chin slightly and hisses, "You come here now, or I'll come to you, and you don't want that. Trust me."
Your whole body screams to move toward him to find out what he wants, but your stubbornness is not so easily put out of action, "Rick-"
The knuckles around his gun turn white, "Now."
The tone in his voice actually makes you walk toward him, and as soon as you're within his reach, he grabs you by the arm and tugs you toward the hood.
His grip is so tight that you struggle against him, suddenly feeling something like panic as you realize you don't stand a chance against Rick.
He pushes you in front of him like a doll and presses your upper body onto the hood.
Panicked, you try to push yourself up with your hands, but his hand is heavy on your back and you flounder helplessly on the hood, "What are you doing? Let go of me!"
Your breathing becomes frantic and you can hardly believe it, but you're actually afraid of Rick.
When you think about how innocently he was sleeping next to you in the car earlier and now he's forcing you to bend over the hood, you feel sick.
You try to take a deep breath and relax as best you can as you murmur as softly as you can, "Let go of me, please."
Never having thought about how strong Rick actually is, you force yourself not to fidget as he takes a step closer behind you and you feel his leg against your thigh.
You barely recognize his voice as he whispers, "Stop talking, sweetheart."
Your heart stops for a moment at your nickname and you have to suppress a soft whimper as you feel his hand on your neck.
He's so...close to you. 
You can barely think straight through fear and what feels like arousal.
Rick can feel your resistance slowly weakening and he dares to loosen his grip on your neck a little. 
When you don't move an inch, he whispers softly, "Good girl."
Shit, he totally digs it when you push up against him. He loves the games you always play when you're teasing each other. He enjoys every minute of it, but after all that shit today, he's had enough.
In fact, he has no idea where you guys are and you having to rub it in his face all the time is driving him nuts.
He sees himself as a pretty controlled man, but as he watched you take out the walker, he couldn't suppress the feeling of finally breaking you for him.
How much he wants you to submit to him is almost laughable.
Quietly, you lie on the hood in front of him and he can't help but look at your pretty ass, which is maddening in those tight jeans.
Rick takes a deep breath and closes his eyes as his cock presses uncomfortably against his pants.
He doesn't really think about it as he rests his gun-holding hand on your soft ass and the cold barrel of the gun slides between your thighs. Roughly you groan and push yourself against him a bit, which surprises you so much yourself that you wince and hope that he hasn't noticed.
The hope quickly disappears as he pulls the barrel a little higher again and you take a loud breath.
Watching your body react is mesmerizing and he stares at your ass, which keeps trying to push against him, "Sweetheart?"
Mortified, you close your eyes and murmur, "Yes, Rick?"
He releases his hand from your neck and briefly you think about straightening up to get away from him, but as his hand reaches around you to grab your pants, your body resists the thought of getting away from Rick's hand and you remain still on the hood, waiting to see what Rick is trying to do.
He turns a little in your direction and instead of his leg, his cock is now pressing against your thigh and he murmurs softly, "Spread your legs."
Your stomach tightens and you do as he says, which makes him laugh harshly, "Oh, when it comes to me touching your pussy, you suddenly do as I say."
It's so incredibly humiliating and you could cry as he pulls your underpants, including panties, down so far that the fabric stretches around your thighs and the cool air hits the embarrassing wetness between your legs.
Almost as if driven by self-preservation, you do try to straighten up, but he quickly pushes you back onto the hood, "Stay down."
These little moments when you seem to be struggling after all turns him on incredibly and he slides a hand between your thighs.
A jolt goes through your body as Rick's fingers brush over your most intimate spot and you hear him moan harshly.
You bite your lower lip as you feel the cool barrel of his gun contrast with his warm fingers on your skin.
He slowly slides the gun in the direction where his fingers linger and immediately you tense, "What are you doing?" You barely recognize your own voice, but you don't care and croak again, "Rick?"
He can literally feel the panic you're feeling, and it's probably completely wrong that that's exactly what's making him harder.
Rick slides the barrel of his gun between your butt cheeks, enjoying the way you flinch as the metal of the gun digs into your soft skin.
He pulls his fingers from your wetness and instead slides his gun between your already swollen labia, "You take what I give you, sweetheart."
You whimper, "You can't be serious."
Firmly he pushes the barrel of the gun an inch inside you, "Does this feel like I'm not serious?"
The barrel is wide and you so damn tight that you feel like he's tearing you apart inch by inch as he slowly pushes it inside you. As he does so, the legitimate thought that the gun is loaded fades completely into the background and all you can feel is the cold thickness penetrating deeper and deeper into you.
Groaning, you squirm and gasp, "It's too big. It hurts."
Your pussy clenches around the barrel and Rick pushes it in a little deeper again, "Does it?"
Whimpering, you nod and look up at him for the first time since he forced you over the hood.
As you look at him with eyes veiled in arousal, his cock twitches and he tilts his head a little, "Why don't you beg me to stop then?"
He pushes the barrel a little deeper into you again and you moan, "Rick..."
It feels so incredibly dirty to be at his mercy like this, and yet you want more.
Pathetically, you try not to tighten around the barrel of the gun again, taking in as much as you can, which doesn't escape Rick's notice, and he grumbles, "Then stop lying and take it like a good girl. All of it."
Trembling, you yip, "Turn me over. I want to look at you while I do it."
He pulls the gun back a little and immediately you miss how deep it was inside you.
"What was that?" 
You can tell by his voice what he wants. 
What he's always wanted. 
For you to beg him.
"Please, turn me around. I'll take anything you give me, but please...I want to look at you while I do it-" Briefly you take a breath "Sir."
Growling, he grabs your waist and reaches around you so he can spin you around so you're sitting on the hood and he can keep the barrel of the gun inside you.
With your lips slightly parted, you watch Rick pull your pants down to your calves and then climb over them so he can stand between the fabric and your body like he's trapped. 
But only you feel like you can barely breathe because he's so close to you and your pussy is still being stretched.
Finally he looks you in the face again and the pure lust in his eyes makes you lean forward and put your lips firmly on his.
Rick grabs your chin with his free hand, pushing the barrel of the gun deeper into you again.
The feeling is so intense that you break the kiss and bite his lower lip to stifle a loud groan.
With his hand on your chin, he forces you to open your mouth and release himself so he can lean in and murmur into your ear as he thrusts into you again, "Do you like that, sweetheart? Do you like me fucking you like a whore with my gun?"
The thought of what he keeps thrusting into you makes you go crazy and you bury your face in the hollow where his shoulder meets his neck to muffle your moans, "Yes, oh god yes..."
You could never tell anyone what you let him do to you and that makes it all that much more wicked.
Your moans vibrate against Rick's hold and he takes his second hand to touch your clit.
It's only a small touch, but your hands tangle in his hair and he continues to tease, "So pathetic."
He knows exactly what he's doing and what he's denying you as you start to move on his hand to get more, but the circles he draws around your clit are too slow and he knows it.
Whimpering, you cry, "Please, Rick...please, sir."
You're so pathetic in his arms that he can't suppress a laugh, "Stop whining."
He's pushed you to the point where you'll do anything for him. 
Anything just so he wouldn't stop.
Trembling, you spread your legs as wide as you can and push your hips closer to him, but his touch remains frustratingly light and gentle, making you cry, "I'm begging you...please...what do you want me to do...I'll do anything..."
He presses a little harder on your clit and your pussy tightens around the gun inside you, "Anything then?"
You jerk your head back to look him pleadingly in the eyes as you whimper, "Anything."
He loves seeing that addiction in your eyes and he tilts his head as he pulls the gun out of your dripping pussy and you moan in protest, "No..."
Rick raises his eyebrows, "First you don't want to and now you do?"
Normally you're eye-to-eye with Rick, but his cocky demeanor makes you shrink into yourself and you whisper, "Please."
His eyes slide over your soft features and flushed cheeks, and he holds the gun shiny from your wetness in front of your face, "Lick it clean."
You hesitate for a second before looking him in the beautiful blue eyes and leaning forward to put the gun in your mouth. At the taste of your own, you roll your eyes and let out a muffled moan before looking back up at him. 
Slowly, you let the gun slide out of your mouth and lick it with your tongue.
Rick can't take his eyes off you even if he wanted to.
The way you lick the gun that took so many lives, as if it were his cock and the most beautiful gift in the world, makes even the last rational thought fizzle out and he hisses, "Unzip my pants."
He sets the gun down next to you on the hood and leans back a bit as you reach for his pants with shaky hands.
His cock pressing against the fabric is hard to miss, and your mouth waters as you think of him replacing the gun that was inside you earlier with his cock now.
You undo his holster, which immediately falls to the floor, and then his belt, which holds his pants low on his hips.
Your heart hammers in your chest and you feel your wetness dripping onto the hood below you.
He watches you undo his pants and then reach for the waistband to pull them down over his ass.
His cock immediately pops out and a low moan escapes you.
Your eyes are fixed firmly on the twitching cock in front of you and your pussy clenches at the sight.
The way you sit there and can't look away is the best thing he's seen in a long time. 
The fact that a few minutes ago you were still resisting and trembling with fear, while now you are begging to be fucked by him is all he can think about.
You are still staring at his cock, when Rick grabs you by the waist and pulls you to the edge of the hood so that his tip presses against your pussy and you look him breathlessly in the eyes, "Please."
You wiggle your ass to somehow get him inside you, but his hands on your hips are firm and unyielding, "Please what, sweetheart?"
He lifts his hips a little and slides his shaft over your wetness, making you moan hoarsely, "Please, sir. Please, please, please."
You've never begged before and never intended to, but right now all you want is for him to have mercy on you and let you wrap your wet walls around him.
He leans in and his lips graze your ear, "Will you do whatever I want you to do?" His accent is wider than usual with arousal and you gasp, "Yes, sir."
Rick presses an inch into you as a reward and growls, "Always?"
Completely will-less, you press your torso against his and whimper, "Yes, sir."
Another inch, "Good girl."
His tongue licks over your neck, "Do you want my cock?"
Moaning, you close your eyes and breathe, "Yes, sir." 
Your voice breaks on the last word and as a reward Rick thrusts his hips forward replacing what was previously the barrel of the gun inside you.
The metal from his gun was cool inside you, whereas his cock twitches hot and heavy inside you, making you almost pass out.
Your hands tighten in the fabric of his shirt to find purchase as he pulls back slightly and then thrusts slowly and deeply into you again.
Gasping, you bury your face against his neck as your pussy clenches around him again and again.
The feel of your wet walls around his cock, makes his heart stop for a moment and a low growl escapes his throat.
You feel so good around his hard cock and every time your pussy tightens around him, it feels like you're just pulling him deeper inside you.
He releases one hand from your hip and uses it to push your hair to the side so he can spread wet kisses on your neck, and you willingly tilt your head to the side to give him more room.
Slowly his thrusts get firmer and faster, causing a smacking sound between your legs that you don't even have to be ashamed of as Rick gasps against your neck, "Fuck, you're so wet for me."
He fucks you so hard you feel like he's rearranging your guts, and you dig your teeth into his neck to stifle a loud moan as he slides his hand between you to press on your clit.
You're already so incredibly sensitive there that you whimper, "I'm about to cum."
His circles around your clit speed up and your whole body is on fire, but he hisses, "No."
You tug at his shirt, "I can't take it anymore."
To torture you, his circles tighten and your legs start to shake. 
You force yourself to work against the orgasm as he thrusts firmly into you, "You'll cum when I tell you to, sweetheart."
Him calling you 'sweetheart' only makes it worse and you try to slide away from him so you can comply with his request and not cum on his cock yet.
But his grip is tight and you're too weak to pull away, "Rick...you have to stop...I can't...oh god..."
Your whole body tenses and tears come to your eyes as you actively fight against your release. 
It's almost sad that you want to make him proud by suppressing your orgasm and he just hisses, "You take what I give you and I swear I'll spank you if you cum without my permission."
Tears roll down your cheeks and you sob, "I can't take it anymore."
His fingers on your clit and his cock in your pussy feels too good and as he growls harshly, "Now." It tears you apart from the inside.
Never in your life have you come so hard and desperate as when pressed against Rick's body.
Your pussy pulses around his hardness and the feel of your tears leaving wet trails down his neck only turns him on more and he can't help but lay claim on you, "Whose pussy is that, sweetheart?"
Your whole body trembles under his grip and you give a long drawn out moan, "Yours, sir."
He rewards you by pulling his head back a little and kissing you hard on the lips and then gasps, "When I've come in your pussy, it's not just mine. Then you're mine."
Your foggy brain only hears that he's going to come inside you and you panic, "Rick...no...not inside me."
He grabs your chin and looks at you questioningly as he keeps fucking you and you whimper, "Please don't."
You look up at him pleading and trembling and his cock twitches inside your pussy wet with cum, making him grumble harshly, "You're shaking from cumming all over my cock and begging me to stop? You don't really want me to stop doing this...you like when I make your little pussy all wet and sticky, huh?"
Your last resistance breaks and you bring a soft "yes" to your lips before he presses his mouth over yours again and his beard scrapes across your chin.
His fingers dig into your hips and you know you'll be carrying away marks tomorrow as he stiffens and moans harshly into your mouth as he comes jerking inside you.
You've never had a man come inside you before and at the warm feeling spreading through your belly as he thrusts his warm cum into you, you whimper against his swollen lips.
You feel him softening inside you and you pull away from the kiss, blinking.
The adrenaline rush slowly wears off and you stare at Rick in disbelief. 
Not only because he did this to you, no, but also because you can't believe yourself that you let him do this to you.
He pulls his cock out of your pussy and you feel his cum mixed with yours dripping onto the hood.
Speechless, you stare at his pretty face as he looks between your legs and slides his hand between them.
He gathers up what's dripping out of you and pushes his fingers, saying, "You are supposed to say 'thank you'." Into your overused pussy.
As if in a trance, you say, "Thank you, sir." And he nods in satisfaction.
Rick surprisingly gently pulls you off the hood and pulls your pants back up over your ass.
You find your own thoughts, "Why did you do that?"
You look so utterly confused that this amuses him deeply and he raises an eyebrow, "What do you mean? That I fucked you or that I put your pants back on?"
He sees you swallow, "The fucking."
Unimpressed, he shrugs, "I wanted you, so I took you. Get used to it."
Speechless, your mouth drops open and he adjusts his own pants as he reaches for his gun on the hood, "We should spend the night here and see where we are in the morning."
You don't even realize he just admitted he doesn't know where you are and can't suppress a whimper as he pulls away from you and walks around the car to the driver's door.
Shit, you're dependent on him. 
Something you never wanted, but you already miss his hands on your body and run after him like a lonely puppy begging him to sit on his lap.
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jeansplaytoy · 1 year ago
Text
“Ain’t shit.” - c.springer
(part four here.) (part six here.)
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part 5
when this might be you and connie’s last conversation, you couldn’t care less about an argument.
violence, mentions of medium blood/bleeding, arguments, language.
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it was another friday, a week after you made up with connie.
but coming to your senses, you realized he did admit to cheating on you, which didn’t end well for him because you were now in his car calmly telling him how much of a bitch he was for even thinking about doing that and how “you shouldn’t even have admitted to that shit cus that just pissed me off the moment i heard it.”
“mm-hmm.” connie hummed, nodding slowly.
the whole floch thing had ended, and you forgave each other. but the whole cheating thing just caught you off guard as you thought about it.
a whole week later.
“and who was the bitch? cus i know damn well she wasn’t better than me.” you raised your eyebrows and pointed to yourself while looking at him.
connie shook his head. “nah, she wasn’t.”
“i know. cus you piss me off. how you gon get mad at me for putting yo dumbass out and you was the one lyin to my motha’ fuckin face.” you spoke to him in such a calm voice, but he sucked in air through his teeth with every harsh shot you threw at him.
“peach-“
“matter fact, i don’t even know why i’m in yo damn car when i could’ve brought my own shit. i don’t know why you wanted to pick me up.” you cut him off, completely ignoring that dumb nickname he gave you.
“y/n-“
“and then you had the nerve to blame me for all the shit i did when it wasn’t even as bad at what you did? shit, i must’ve been in my feelings when you admitted that shit cus i would’ve punched you in yo shit.” you looked at him with a frown. “see this exactly why ion listen to yo ass because you be having me forgive you for that dumb shit, nigga i should run this car off the road.” you nudged his shoulder a little.
“y-“
“and then i was dumb enough to keep you at my house? boy fuck you— i should whoop yo ass in this fuckin’ car. but i can’t mess up my nails again.” you mumbled the last part while looking at your nails that he paid for.
“you done?” connie asked after a long amount of silence. you nodded and looked out the door.
he looked at you and then at the road before softly inhaling to say something.
of course he couldn’t.
“and i fuckin hate you. we never getting back together. ever. we ain’t even together right now. i don’t even know why i’m wasting my time wit’cho ass, knowing you prolly gon do the same shit again.” you nudged his head to the side while staring at him with a pissed face.
connie sighed. “are you done?”
“yes.” you said quietly.
“so we really not getting back together?” he asked, glancing at you from the road. you raised your eyebrow and looked at him again.
“fuck. no.” you said in almost a whisper.
all he did was nod before parking his car somewhere near the house before turning it off. as he got out, you stayed in the car, giving him a mean look as he walked around the car to open your door and close it behind you.
“i gotta open the door for you too?” he mumbled with a small smile. you gave him another mean mug and fully ignored him while walking on the concrete up to the entrance.
connie only followed closely behind you, looking around at all the people that looked at you two — like they always did — because of the way you argued last week and was walking together this week.
it could’ve been a never ending cycle. if you were dumb. but you couldn’t even forgive the dude for what he did it you.
as you opened the door for yourself, you walked in, and just like last time, everything filled your ears and nose. “aye ima go wit the gang. don’t get in no trouble.” connie poked your back before walking off somewhere else. you stared at him before humming and rolling your eyes.
you’ve never even been to whoever’s house this was, but it was more spacious for a party.
you went to the kitchen, again, getting compliments on your outfit along the way.
you rubbed your glossed and lined lips together before pouring yourself a drink, taking a long sip before swallowing the whole bit, sucking the bitter flavor off your own tongue. looking around to find sasha or mikasa, or anyone other than one of the guys in that case, you couldn’t find them.
so you just decided to walk over to where connie was, in hopes of finding someone other than him, and to your surprise, everyone was there.
“girl where you been?” mikasa smiled looking you up and down. you smacked your lips. “ain’t nobody tell me the whole group was over here.” you said before glancing at connie who was already smoking weed. “my bad.” he said before exhaling.
you looked around for any source of alcohol, just to get your mind off of the normal things. but the only cup around you was connie’s. you looked at him before leaning down to get it and stared at him as you used his t-shirt to rub the rim of it before drinking the whole thing.
“so y’all back together? again?” eren raised his eyebrow as his arm rested around mikasa. connie shook his head. “nah. we cool off each other. just hanging around each other.” he mumbled before taking another swift hit of the blunt in his hand, already looking high as hell before sitting the rest on the ashtray and reaching towards the cup you had, looking at you when he saw it was empty. “thirsty ass.” he mumbled, grabbing another bottle to fill the cup.
“so y’all just chillin for now.” ony said, rolling up another blunt. you nodded slowly. “for good.” you corrected him.
“yall ain’t getting back together? crazy.” sasha chuckled at you. you shook your head. “i can’t get back wit his ass.” you mumbled to yourself, but loud enough for connie to hear. “man you look like friends sitting over there. like when yall asses first met.” ony laughed at you.
“suck my dick.” connie smiled a little before taking a sip from his cup.
“aye bro, ain’t that floch?” eren frowned, pointing behind you and connie. connie didn’t even try to look back, and when you did, he looked at you and then ony. ony widened his eyes a little before resting them again.
“you ain’t gon fight him again, right?” sasha squinted at connie. “cus if you do ima whoop yo ass.”
connie smacked his lips. “i ain worried bout him.” he mumbled. “i already beat his ass, as long as he don’t come over here fuckin wit nobody, i’m straight.” he held his hands up in defense with a light smile.
everyone but you looked at him suspiciously. you were too focused on the way floch glanced at you.
‘don’t bring yo ass over here.’ you thought to yourself. but it was too late because as soon as he saw you, he was.
you sighed. “fuck.” you muttered lowly to yourself before scooting closer to connie, who looked at you. “you good?” he asked. you nodded. “mhm.”
you tried to see if anybody else noticed the fact that he was literally walking over to you, and of course they didn’t. you felt someone touch your shoulder. “y/nnn, long time no see. it’s been what, a week?” floch said, leaning towards you.
everyone went silent and looked at connie, who licked his lips and stretched his legs out, taking a deep breath in and out.
“didn’t you just get yo ass beat by connie? so what the fuck you doin over here?” mikasa squinted at floch. “did i? oh, ion remember that.” floch mumbled before moving around the couch and sitting right beside you, gaining stares from ony and eren.
as much as you wanted to get disrespectful, you didn’t wanna get that nigga jumped, so you kept your composure and bit your lip, looking at the ground as he wrapped his arm around your waist, moving you slightly closer to him.
connie’s eyes moved to floch’s hand, before he side eyed you and looked forward again, grabbing his drink and taking a sip.
“aye, you don’t see she uncomfortable?” ony frowned, dabbing his blunt with his tongue while staring at floch. “she ain’t say she was uncomfortable, did she?” floch pursed his lips together. your hands rested underneath your thighs and you deeply inhaled.
“why you acting so different from last week? you just wanted me all up on you.” floch mumbled, loud enough to make sure connie heard, and he did, manspreading and grabbing his phone, scrolling through instagram.
“that wasn’t for real. i was tryna make somebody jealous.” you laughed a little.
“mh. it did work, didn’t it?” he said, keeping his eyes on you, taking one quick glance at connie who kept his eyes on his phone.
“ion know.” you shrugged while looking around the crowded house. “you know you ain’t always gotta stay wit the same person. i could give you sum better.” he said, moving his free hand to your thigh. you smacked your lips. “man get away from me, i don’t want yo ass.” you pushed him off of you.
that’s all it took for ony to put his blunt down, eren to start laughing, and connie to put his phone down, exhaling.
“c’mere.” connie grabbed your hand, leading you to the other side of him. before you could sit down, floch grabbed your wrist. “nah she good over here.” he said, pulling you towards him. connie finally looked at floch before chuckling.
“didn’t she just tell you to get away from her?” connie squinted. floch stood up. “you still got a problem huh.”
connie bit his lip before standing up along with floch. “ight chill con’.” sasha said, looking at him and floch.
“nah cus you wanna get’cho ass beat again so ion know why the fuck you still testing me.” connie pulled his pants up, pushing you back a little. “connie don’t even worry bout it-“ you tried to stop him, but it seemed like this time he was more mad than annoyed.
“you tryna start wit me bout a female that don’t even want yo ass, connie.” floch laughed and squinted.
“ight, but it’s still war over her ass when it come to me.” connie bit his lip, while raising his eyebrows.
“war, huh? you ain’t so shit yet tho.” floch muttered.
“listen, i ain wit allat talkin shit cus i’ll hit’cho ass right now.” connie chucked a little, reaching and resting his hand under his shirt. “connie, for real, just go outside.” eren said, sitting up.
“nah if he wanna do sum he can do sum.” floch raised his eyebrows.
“oh i can?”
“hell yeah you can, so wassup?”
suddenly you saw connie quickly reach in his waist band and you heard a gunshot, jumping and flinching.
everyone started to scream.
you looked down to see that floch was holding his thigh, panting as he looked up at connie with a frown. “what the fuck?!” he yelled before connie tucked his gun in his waistband and pulled his tshirt down, grabbing you by the arm and dragging you outside.
“what the fuck is wrong wit’cho ass?” you frowned, trying to release his grip from your wrist, but he was far more strong than you. suddenly, connie was grabbed by someone else. one of floch’s lil friends.
“you think you finna get away wit that shit?” he frowned and pointed backwards. “fuck away from me.” connie mumbled, pushing the guy. the guy pushed him back, but before he could even throw a punch, you reached in connie’s pants, grabbing his gun and pointing it at the dude.
“get the fuck back, before you get shot too.” you mumbled, finger itching to pull the trigger.
“and connie, get the fuck back. go.” you waved the gun back.
boom.
everyone paused, it’s like the screams that got louder, blurred out and everything was moving in slow motion. you looked at connie.
blood soaking the side of his waist.
you looked behind the guy in front of you, seeing floch. “the fuck? what the fuck?!” you panicked, looking at connie.
that’s when eren and ony rushed out of the house, guns in their hands too.
“shit…” you whispered.
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last comments left me a lil astonished, cs that’s how y’all feel? jk hope you like this. :)
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beautifulchris · 5 months ago
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obsessed
pairing: dancer!lee minho x videographer!gn!reader
summary: minho was the most perfect guy you had the privilege of encountering—and working with. without even trying—or meaning to—, he got you wrapped around his fingers
genres: fluff, angst, strangers to lovers to exes!au, colleagues!au, first person pov!!
wc: 4,4k
tw: obsession, toxic relationship, swearing (in lyrics only, who would've thought), violence, injuries, mention of blood
notes: heyyy! this fic is part of my collection of fics! indented are the lyrics, banner made by me on canva. andddd i'd appreaciate it greatly if you could tell me what you thought about it!! happy reading!
listen to the song for a more immersive experience: spotify link | youtube link
networks: @kflixnet @k-labels @kwritersworld @whipped-kpop-creators @straykidsland
permanent tag list: @soobin-chois @exfolitae @linos-catnip @prettymiye0n (tell me if you want to be added/removed)
stray kids tag list: @raethethey
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Lee Minho (1998).
Have you seen this man?
Perfect skin, heart face shape, a sharp nose, wide cheekbones, cat-like eyes, long eyelashes and pretty, pouty lips.
The moment I laid eyes on him, I knew it was over. He was just so attractive, always walking like he owned the place, and, without realizing it, I became infatuated with him.
I was a newbie videographer in this dancing company called Twinkle Toes. Yes, I did apply there because of its name, being an ATLA fan and all. Anyway, Minho was the best dancer they had.
The obsession started when I first saw him dance. His technique and control were perfect, I could clearly see why he was a professional dancer. All the fluid and effortlessly looking movements he made gave me goosebumps every time I was behind the camera. Or anywhere inside the room, really.
I approached him first. Complimented him on his dancing, which seemed to please him. I kept being supportive and throwing seductive glances his way every now and then. I became hungry for his attention.
Oh, my Lord, never met someone like you before Think I'm kinda going overboard Now I'm obsessed, how can somebody be so perfect? Boy, you really got me by the neck Whatever you want, you just gotta ask
I made no secret of my admiration. Soon, everybody knew but I couldn’t care less.
“You’re so strong, Minho,” I mused from behind the camera. “Thanks to your efforts, the video will come out perfectly.”
He failed to suppress a smile, yet dismissed the compliment with a vague movement of his hand. “It’s a team effort.”
Of course, I knew that. Yeah. The fourteen other dancers were good, but none of them were in the same league as Minho. He was above everyone in this company.
I was usually right.
After filming ended, I took my stuff—camera, tripod, laptop—and walked towards my designated studio where I could work on editing. I wasn’t totally installed when someone knocked on the door. It was so faint I thought I’d dreamed it, until they knocked again.
I opened the door, revealing a shy looking Minho, who didn’t seem to be able to meet my eyes. I found it adorable.
“Yes?”
“Uh, I… Can I come in?”
Now, why would he even want to come inside? Was my flirting so powerful that he already wanted to spend more time with me? I wasn’t one to complain about that.
“Sure,” I said, taking a step back and closing the door behind him.
“So that’s what your studio looks like,” he commented, looking around.
It was a small room with a large desk filled with everything I needed to do my job. The stuff I had with me in the danceroom plus a computer, lenses, microphones, cables, memory cards… Everything was perfectly organized. Bigger equipment—camera bags, studio light, reflectors, tripods—were tidied next to the desk. A gaming chair was in front of it, and on the other side was a two-seater sofa.
“Do you mind if I stay with you while you work?”
I smiled internally. It was so easy.
“No, of course. Are you done for the day?”
“Yeah, finally. Thanks.”
“What for?”
“For letting me stay with you.”
SCREAMING. PUNCHING THE WALL. I could’ve smacked his arm right now for saying this so casually. Sure enough, I didn’t. Instead, I motioned for him to sit on the sofa while I placed my laptop on the desk before opening it.
I could tell I was professional with how well I handled the situation I was in. I kept my desire to turn around and stare at him buried inside me as I edited the video. I had a week to finalize it for an upcoming dancing contest. I was determined to show the dancers’ best side through the video. I also tried not to show Minho too much, even though he was around 20% more present than the rest. It wasn’t my fault the videos he was in were better.
Oh, well. It was common knowledge he was our best hope at winning.
It was getting late, and I was feeling hungry. I saved my progress, switched off the computers and turned around. I’d imagined Minho to be fast asleep, as my job could be found boring from the outside. To my surprise, he was looking straight at me.
“Are you OK?” I asked, conscious he had been waiting for a long time.
See, I checked the time before closing my laptop. I had been working for a bit more than two hours.
He nodded. “Are you, though? Don’t you feel sore?”
Now that he mentioned it, I couldn’t feel my butt anymore. A common occurrence in this field. I got up, stretched arms, back, legs and unintentionally yawned.
“Do you want to get dinner?”
He seemed nervous all of a sudden. Ah, if I could make him mine right now…
“Only if you pay.”
“Deal.”
Ten minutes later, we were walking side-by-side toward a little restaurant owned by a strict-looking yet lovely grandma near our workplace. We’d eaten there before, with our coworkers.
As a typical small-business Korean restaurant, the room was approximately ten times bigger than my studio. Twelve four-seater tables were placed around the room at a relatively safe distance from each other. On every one of them were a wooden cutlery holder for four, and a matching little box full of thin napkins. The walnut-colored counter was on the far end of the room, and the hole that was supposed to be a door behind it led to the kitchen. The only thing giving a bit of privacy to the cook were white lace curtains attached to each side of the… door-shaped hole. On the left side of the room, a TV screen and posters—with pictures—of the menu were displayed on the wall. While on the right side, as well as a bathroom door, were decorations and an ‘appreciation wall’ with a lot of little notes and doodles from customers.
I wanted to sit next to it. If we ran out of things to say, we could always talk about that.
Grandma greeted us with a smile when she saw us, showing us to a table on the opposite side. “Hello grandma, can we actually sit at that one? It’s easier to watch TV there.”
Of course, I had no intention to watch TV, but no one needed to know that.
“Sure, my child, go sit. I’ll be right there.”
Thanking her, we sat right next to the rating wall.
There was one other customer closest to the counter. A regular, by the looks of it. Grandma went to the kitchen and came back with a steaming dish. She delicately put it down in front of the man before providing us with the menus. He thanked her and resumed his reading of a journal. Which I couldn’t identify because I don’t read journals.
Minho and I looked at the menu like we had no idea what to order. While I already knew what his favorite dish was, I opted for something I hadn’t tried before. You see, I like to try everything on the menu. It was a habit in restaurants I often went to. Of course, if it were to be a one-time restaurant, I would order the food that makes me salivate the most. Minho preferred savory foods. The tastier, the better.
He rapidly scanned the plastified paper on the table before looking up at me. “I’ve chosen. You?”
I straightened up, flashing my signature grin, and nodded once. “Same. Any drinks?”
“Soju?”
“Sure.”
Three young people entered the place. Grandma placed them on the left side of the room and came to us. “What would you like, my children?”
“Bulgogi bibimbap for me, please.”
“Jajangmyeon and a bottle of soju, please,” Minho ordered, taking the menu from me and giving them both back to grandma with a sweet smile.
She smiled like a lovely grandma would—contently with a hint of nostalgia.
We never got to speak about the appreciation wall nor did I once glanced at the TV, because we talked a lot and there were few moments of silence.
After that dinner, we spent a lot of time together outside the company. I believed he enjoyed my presence as much as I savored his. We flirted, went on dates every now and then, and recently started dating.
Then, around two months after our first day together, a new, talented dancer entered the company. Her body had beautiful curves. She had long, black silky hair, and toned abs. It didn’t help that she was gorgeous, social, and easygoing.
In just a few days, she had befriended the whole building. It felt like she had always been there. To my dismay, even Minho seemed to like her.
“What do you think of Soojin?” I asked as casually as manageable, considering I was eager to get an answer.
“She’s cool.” Minho shrugged, looking up at the blue sky. “And a good dancer. Why do you ask?”
How he could manage to look so ethereal under the sunlight yet give me such a soft glance was beyond my understanding. He got a hold on me, that was for sure.
“I agree, she’s good. You might have to share your spotlight in the next competitions and projects.”
He smirked. “Was about time. It’s been lonely up there.”
I knew he was joking. He never considered himself as above his colleagues. I frowned for another reason. I couldn’t ignore the thought from overwhelming me. Was I not enough for him? Was I just a pastime? I wasn’t a dancer. Was it a dealbreaker for him? 
Minho’s gentle glance became a concerned stare as he stopped in his tracks. “What’s wrong?”
“Do you like me?”
He opened his mouth, but I couldn’t wait for his response.
“Am I good enough? Do you like Soojin more? Do you want to date her? Are you just playing with me?”
Because I would still be wrapped around your finger either way.
“Hey, breathe, babe. I’m here, I’m with you.”
I did as told, and my next words came out as a whisper.
“Are you though?”
“Where is all this coming from? Why would I be interested in Soojin?”
“She’s gorgeous, talented, and a sweetheart. Who wouldn’t like her?”
He smiled softly, taking my hand in his. “Is this your way of telling me you’re interested in her?”
“I’m serious.”
“You have nothing to worry about. I like you.”
I wanted to believe him, but I couldn’t get rid of the voices.
Soojin and Minho were the jewels of the company. Meaning they had way more screen time—which was my job—and training sessions together—which was their job. I had to stand behind my camera for hours while watching them dance together. Helplessly watching their bodies touch and their breaths tangle. The sensual moves made me want to break something.
Jealousy stirred up inside me, and I think it showed, because several colleagues around the room sent me looks of pity and sorry.
I knew it was just the job for Minho, but I couldn’t help it. It was beyond my control. Ever since the choreographers created this dance, I have been vile to Minho. Exposing my jealousy to him in private.
“I’m sorry, sweetie. I hate hurting you. Really. However, I can’t simply stop dancing. It’s my dream life.”
“I’m not asking you to stop doing what you love, I’m asking you to stop doing it with her!” I snapped.
“Doing that will get me fired, you know that. I told you I picture you whenever I’m dancing with her. Is it not enough?”
He was pleading, but I could sense he was tired and frustrated.
“I like you, not Soojin. I need you to understand that.”
“You say that now,” I said in a low voice, “but I see the way she looks at you.” My voice broke, and I looked away.
Minho shook his head. “Please, stop. I’m exhausted. I’m dating you, aren’t I? What more do you need to be satisfied?”
It stinged. The worst part was he didn’t scream. His voice was stern and accusing. No words would leave my lips. He took my silence as a cue to leave the toxic environment I created. I couldn’t blame him for wanting to stay away.
But I could blame someone else.
I tried to film Soojin in her less good angle, but it felt like she was flawless under any angle. It was frustrating, not even being able to compromise her while doing my job.
Minho, being smart and all, realized what I was trying to do while Soojin was doing a solo dance. His eyes were glued to me the whole time. He grabbed me by the arm the minute I finished for the day and brought all my stuff back to my studio. He made me turn around to face him.
“What did you do back there?”
I was hurt by his suspicion, even though he was right. I stood my ground and lied through my teeth. “I didn’t do anything.”
He sighed in exasperation and let go of me. “Look, I won’t say I know you because clearly, as much as I thought I did, I actually don’t. But I know you did something.” His face softened, but his lips stayed pressed in a thin line. “Please, help me understand. Why would you resent Soojin so much you’re willing to risk your job? What do I ignore?”
I was angry. Why would he defend her if nothing was happening between the two?
“Why do you care so much, Minho? Who is she to you?”
He stepped back, blinking a few times. “This again? I don’t recognize you anymore, Y/N. I thought I knew you. Since Soojin joined our crew, you’ve changed. I believe I didn’t give you any reason to be jealous of her, excluding my job. Then again, I know how to separate professional and personal matters. I chose not to where you’re concerned because I liked you. But now, I don’t think I want to do this any longer. It’s draining me, and I lost my will to fight for us.”
Wait. What?
“Are you breaking up with me? Is that it?” I sounded frantic—and I was. All I understood from his tirade was that he was leaving me, probably for her. This bitch. She dared steal my boyfriend.
“All these past weeks fighting made me reconsider our relationship. I’m sorry, Y/N. I like you, but I can’t be with you.”
He silently stared at me for a moment, hurt and determination visible on his face, before turning heels and heading out.
My legs gave out. Minho broke up with me. I had no intention to accept this. It was all this woman’s fault. She had bewitched him, I was sure of it.
When I ran into Minho the next day, he avoided looking me in the eyes. Everybody could see something was wrong. They could even sense it, as the tension was thick in the air.
“Is something wrong?” Soojin asked as she entered the room. She looked around the room and offered me a sweet and innocent smile.
I wanted to lunge at her. It took everything in me to stand still.
“Let’s get started,” the director said as soon as his left foot touched the floor. He clapped his hands, getting everyone’s attention. He stopped at the center of the room. “Today we’re going to film a two-minute promotional video for our project. I count on you, Y/N, to make this video as appealing as all the other ones you made until now.” He winked at me. “Dancers, I expect you to be in good shape. I need you to accentuate your moves.” This time, he winked at Minho and Soojin.
I was close to rip my hair out.
We did as told. While the dancers gave their all in their dancing, I moved around them with my camera to capture their moves from different angles, creating a nice flow. Nowadays, videographers would use a gimbal to provide support and stabilization, but my camescope and feet were all I needed. This type of work called for a more natural flow, which could only be done without any device.
I knew how to be professional, too, but hated every second I spent filming the top dancers sensually touching each other’s bodies, especially from this close. The looks they gave one another, were they really only professional? I wasn’t sure Minho had ever looked at me like he was staring at Soojin at this moment.
I decided to put aside my anger for the sake of my job, and made the best promotional video yet. Not that I would ever admit it, but their chemistry was undeniable and greatly increased the quality of the video.
Slowly, but surely, I watched Minho and Soojin grow closer. I tried multiple times to reconnect with him to prevent the inevitable, but he was unyielding. He wouldn’t let me touch him and refused to be in a room alone with me. I found his reactions a bit over the top and insulting. But, even worse, he seemed to be protective of Soojin, as if he was scared I would hurt her if he let her out of his sight.
I would, but it was still vexing.
If you go and get yourself somebody new I don't know what the hell I'd do But if I found out, I will go and turn up at her house Break a nail and rip her hair right out Huh, and I hope you like that I'm crazy like that
Life went on, Minho still got me by the neck unbeknownst to him, and I was still wary of Soojin. A month had passed and a new project started.
“This time, crew, the theme is love. I want to feel it, alright? Do whatever it takes. I’m not worried though, because I believe in you all.”
The little speech the director gave ended up with a round of applause and a whistle from several of the dancers. The choreographers were sending each other smirks, as if they were waiting for this moment. I, obviously, loathed the idea. I had barely managed to contain myself this past month. That was going to be torture.
I was right.
The first official practice for the dance, a week after the announcement, I was behind the camera. If I thought they were close during the past month, I was mistaken. For the most part, their bodies were colliding with each other in a way that made the young managers embarrassed. My blood boiled. If there weren’t all these people around, I would’ve ripped Soojin’s hair out already.
When the song ended, their faces were mere millimeters from one another. They closed the gap between their mouths. I heard a few gasps from the crowd. My eyes lost focus. The fury building inside me sent a throbbing pain in my head. I left the room in a hurry before I could regret my actions. The last thing I saw in the long mirrors were their lips connected in a heated kiss.
I wanted to throw up. I ran to the restroom and sat on the ground in one of the cabins. I touched my cheeks with the back of my hands to check my temperature and realized I was crying. I couldn’t possibly be sad, could I? I stayed seated for what felt like hours, developing a plan to get revenge on Soojin. I was not going to let her go unscathed after what she had done.
The pain eventually subsided. Rage was all that was left in me. I was determined to make the bitch pay. I checked myself in the mirror, relieved to see there was no trace of me crying, and nodded to myself to give me courage. I came back to the dance room like nothing happened. Everybody stopped moving and watched me walk to my camera.
“Sorry, I had an emergency,” I told no one in particular, shooting an apologetic smile around the room. “Please, continue.”
I changed a few parameters on the camera and the room came back to life.
I was one of the first ones to leave the room. I stored my stuff in their respective places. Minho was waiting for me when I walked out of my studio.
“Y/N, I’m sorry—-It just happened—”
I scoffed. “Whatever.”
I'll do anything for you, boy, anything Yeah, I'll do anything, anything for you Yeah, I'll do crazy shit And I'll get away with it Boy, I'll do anything, anything for you
I raced to my car and waited there until Soojin entered her own car. I watched Minho go to her window and talk to her when she rolled it down. She nodded and smiled at him. Sickening. He went to his own car and I followed Soojin when she exited the parking lot. I stayed at a safe distance, but what if Minho knew what I had in mind and warned her?
I shook my head. It didn’t matter. She drove around fifteen minutes and parked in front of what looked like a family house. Was it her own place or did she come to her parents thinking I wouldn’t dare touch her there?
I smiled conspiratorially. None of them really knew me. I parked right behind her and stormed out of my car. I stopped at her window like Minho had done earlier and waited for her to roll it down. She stared at me with fear in her eyes and gulped.
I put on a fake smile and my sweetest voice. “Come on out, Soojin, don’t be scared.”
She slowly reached for the handle and opened the door.
“Look, I’m sor—”
I grabbed her by the neck and threw her on the asphalt. She grunted and rolled over. I pulled her hair up and ignored her faint struggle, whispering in her ear. “You really thought you could steal my boyfriend from me and get away with it?” I let out a nasty laugh.
She shuddered, tears welling up in her eyes. “You’re not together anymore,” she cried. “I’m sorry for hurting you. I didn’t mean to, I swear.”
“You’re too cute. I guess that’s your advantage.”
I pulled her hair a little higher and balled my other hand into a fist. I moved my arm back to gain momentum, but never got to use it. Minho shouted my name from his car, parked right behind mine. I let go of Soojin and watched him dash towards us.
“What’s happening?”
He kneeled next to her, checking her face and scratched arms. She cried, burying her face in his chest and wrapping her arms around his stomach. I huffed and folded my arms over my chest. The second she calmed down, Minho got up and faced me. He frowned.
“What did you do?” His tone was accusing. It angered me.
“Are you for real? How could you get over me that easily? Was I nothing to you?”
“Y/N,” he warned, pinching his nose bridge. Then he gave me a firm stare. “I’m sorry I hurt you. I never meant to. I just assumed you got over it the way I did.” His voice matched the look on his face.
Got over it? Oh, boy.
“I guess I loved you more than you ever did me.”
His surprised expression made no sense to me. He did not comment on it. Instead, he reached for Soojin’s hand and helped her up. “I’ll get you home,” he said softly.
He used to talk to me like that. Take care of me like that. My blood boiled but I just watched, feeling abandoned, as they walked away from me.
When he returned, a few minutes later, I was waiting, my back pressed against the driver’s side door of my car. “What was that about?” he inquired, stopping around three meters away from me, arms crossed over his chest.
“I’ll do anything for you, Minho. Anything. And I got angry at the way she snatched you from me.”
He stepped back, dropping his arms at his sides. “What do you mean, anything?”
“Literally anything.”
“But, Y/N, we broke up. You don’t have to. Besides, she didn’t snatch me, I fell for her.” My heart hurt. Did he really stop loving me that easily? “I’m sorry. Really, I am. I can’t undone our history, nor can I control my feelings.”
“You would undone our history if you could?” That was what hurt the most, I think. That, right there. He regretted being with me.
“No, but what you did today… I’m not sure I can forgive you. You scared Soojin, you scared me. If I knew you would be like this, I—”
“Don’t finish that sentence, please.”
Minho sighed. “I enjoyed being with you, Y/N, honestly. However, that was too much. I won’t ask you to quit your job, but can you please, leave Soojin and I alone? I feel like a dick asking you, especially since you’ll have to watch us a lot, and I also don’t want to quit this amazing company.”
“I’ll do it,” I breathed. A single tear ran down my face. “I’ll quit. I can’t stand by and watch you both all lovey-dovey. And I don’t want to hurt you. I’m sorry.”
It was my fault. I planted the seed of desire in Minho’s head, and my jealousy nourished it. The plant grew and he fell in love with her. I should've known. He never explicitly told me he loved me.
Minho reached for me and for a second, I was tempted to just let him, but that would've been wrong. I wasn’t sure I could leave if he showed me affection. I turned around and hopped in my car.
“Have a good life,” were my last words to my beautiful ex boyfriend before I took off.
The next day, I gave my resignation letter to my boss, and apologized a ton for leaving so suddenly. I pretended to have an urgent family matter hundreds of kilometers away, and moved out during the week. I wanted to put as much distance between Minho and me as possible to help me forget about him. It wasn’t an easy feat. But I moved into a small apartment in another city, got a job in a dancing company named “Encore Dance” and resumed my life.
There, I met a man so pretty I could cry.
Hwang Hyunjin.
Have you seen this man?
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thanks for reading! feedback is always appreciated :) masterlist
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hanasnx · 1 year ago
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Hi Bittyyyyyy :D !!!! Your Han stuff has been killing me I love the way you write him, I think you get his energy down pat, a big ol' meanie who lovesss his pretty little girl EEEE. When I picture Han, it's always sitting in his lap, like he's just so large, takes up so much space, chronic man-spreadder, I've gotta be in his fucking lap kissing him all over or talking his ear off, or listening to him tell stories about his past adventures, literally anything. The thought of being in his lap drives me fucking crazy. You know me and my love of dirty talk, what kind of dirty talk do you think gets him going? What does he like to hear? -donnie
thank you for your compliments :) the reassurance is appreciated bcos like i said, i am an anakin blog. so han's voice is something i have to switch into and take time to embody before i can sit down and focus on writing for him. he rly is a big ol meanie who loves his pretty little girl <3
calling him a "chronic man-spreader" is so real. thats the only way he sits. sometimes he rests his ankle on his knee, but that's still spread. it's only cos he wants to rest his hand somewhere on his calf and his elbow on the back of his chair. a real open stance, for a real confident man.
the idea of you sitting in his lap, this large ass man (who "takes up so much space" as you said 😵‍💫) while you listen oh-so-intently. big eyes looking up at him while he tells you his stories, absentmindedly stroking your head and down your hair, sending you those tingles right up your neck. his fingers catch on the last bits of your hair, closing in on them as his fingertips brush your back. then he starts all over again, big hand palming the top of your head only to slide down.
he'd tell his exciting stories so nonchalantly. as if they're uninteresting now that he's lived them through, but they still have that punch to them to you.
the kind of dirty talk that he likes is actually pretty basic. if you're able to admit to him that you "want" him or "need" him, putting him in that position of power over you, he really likes that. sometimes it works, and he's wants to get going, all because you gave him a green light. but other times, he needs a little more. sacrifice yourself on the altar of humiliation. beg a bit. tell him you can't take another step without his help, his cock, be dramatic with it. be so exaggerated and hyperbolic all so he can say, "okay, okay," roll his eyes, "i get it, sweets. where do you want me?" making a big show of finally being worn down so he can suit your needs. he, himself, doesn't like to feel too desperate, so it's satisfying to see someone else do it. makes him feel desired, necessary. pride's important to him, so show him you don't care about your own.
if you talk a big game about exhibitionism he digs that. tell him you want him to fuck you in front of all these guys at the cantina. right on the bar. he'll say no, but he likes the idea. the fact you're willing to show your most sacred parts to strangers, all for him. all to prove you're willing for him. "c'mon, han. you know you want to. i want to. i know how much you like to show off. brag about me. boast about this pretty cunt by fucking it in front of everyone. that'll show 'em."
that'll most definitely earn you a: "get your little ass back on the falcon."
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mrhowells · 2 years ago
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Smallville 4x16
*this episode put me through it, also the character building for Lois is perfection (also, if you see any typos just close your eyes, it was late and I was emotional)*
Clark looks so suspicious😭😭 Jonathan too, the way he's eyeing that food lmaooooo
Please😭
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"I'm willing to sleep in the barn." "No that's okay, Lois can sleep in the barn." LOL Clark
sass levels through the roof today for him
Look at how proud Lois is listing all of Lucy's achievements😭 She's the best wtf I love her
"Wow, that's impressive. What happened to Lois?"
He has the time of his life dragging her PLS
"You're gonna find that Clark's charm is an acquired taste, much like his sense of fashion." he had that coming
Lois said TRY ME BISH
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pls even Lucy is noticing the tension😭
she wasn't playing with that shoulder punch💀
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Yeah, Jason is not letting those stones go💀
I really feel for Lana, I feel like she just lives in constant fear bc there's always some weird shit happening around her
Lucy flirting with Clark, just pls no💀
"Lois I don't want you to get the wrong idea, but ever since Lucy came to town you've been grumpier than normal."
I love this whole conversation between them🥹
Also Clark making it so obvious he's an only child from a loving family, bless him
"You might be a little rough around the edges but as far as sisters go, Lucy could do a lot worse." EXACTLY
anyone who has Lois in their life won the lottery, not even an exaggeration she's the absolute best🤷🏻‍♀️
"I guess there was just a part of me that was always jealous she got out and I didn't."
LOIS BBY LET ME HUG YOU LET ME LOVE YOU
the way she's like 'oh fuck I was vulnerable, gotta blast🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️', same Lois, same
Clark looks so worried too😭
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this is so wholesome🥹
I think those electric shocks left him with some permanent damage because Jason seems obsessed now👀
Okay let me rephrase, he doesn't just seem obsessed, he's completely unhinged. They fried his brain🤡
Clark is in disappointed dad mode again, he's so natural at it too😭
"You're not mom alright, so stop trying to be." That hurt me personally, goddamn
LMAOOOOO
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also, is this the first episode where we see Lex and Lois in the same frame?👀
Lucy you snake
LOIS DON'T YOU EVER SAY OR THINK THAT
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To everyone who contributed to her feeling this way, I just want to have a talk
This is breaking my heart, the world doesn't deserve her😭😭
Their dad really failed at parenting HARD
no because this hurts fr, I want to hug her so bad
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she deserves to know that she's wanted and loved, SOMEBODY TELL HER
I can't get over the fact that she thinks that her life is less important than that of her sister
Clark defending Lois is something that can be so personal😭 (She deserves a good support system and friends who have her back idc)
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I'm getting very emotional about this excuse me
You know I love a character when I need everyone else to love them too. Like I need every other character on this show to appreciate how amazing Lois is.
"I'm a product of my father's breeding. He needed an heir. But your parents chose you out of love."
No because that's so important and I think it explains why both Lex and Lois are so (for the lack of a better word) fascinated with the Kents.
(ok I paused the episode and wrote like 4 paragraphs of character analysis prompted by that quote but idk what to do with them and if they make any sense, maybe I'll make a separate post🤡)
I need you guys to understand how much it means to me that he really cares about Lois😭
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Not even in any sort of romantic context, just that someone genuinely cares if she's okay or not because she's obviously never really had someone take care of her😭😭😭
I mean listen, good for Lionel that he's not an absolute monster anymore but he really needs to stay out of Lex's business💀💀
WAIT A MINUTE HOLD ON.
HOLD ONNNNNN
Did Lana vandalize her own apartment? Or did she just hide the stone and whoever searched for it didn't find it? In any case she's learning how to play the game, good for her😌😌
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Okay, first of all: More reasons to love Lois, she's self-aware and she can admit when she's wrong about something. Seriously I love her.
Second: Again, they way she's ready to be kicked out of the farm for something that wasn't even her fault??? MR. SAM LANE, SAMMY, GENERAL LANE, I'D LIKE TO HAVE SOME WORDS WITH YOU. Seriously though, this speaks volumes about how she grew up and it breaks my heart.
Third: The way she tries to be so casual and 'Lois' when she says it, I have very similar defense mechanisms and again, it hurts my heart.
"Yeah... actually I came here to tell you we have food in the oven if you're hungry."
Lois learning what unconditional love looks like through the Kent family is the only thing that matters to me, actually
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"You know, all these years I thought I had my sister pegged but... in reality? She's a complete stranger to me." "Even if that were true, I think that if she called you tomorrow you'd be there in a second to help her."
I CAN'T DO THIS RIGHT NOW, HE DOES KNOW HER😭
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SHE KNOWS HIM TOO😭😭
"I guess that explains why we're friends." "Oh, we're friends now?" "Well, I mean, I won't tell anyone if you don't."
Yes you are and I'm so glad bc you're the most amazing people to ever exist😭
Clark deserves someone like Lois in his life and Lois deserves someone like Clark in her life, yes I'm on the verge of tears AND WHAT ABOUT IT
CHEMISTRYYYYY
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shoulder punch my beloved🥹
CHEMISTRYYYYYY
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do you think these people knew they just created perfection?😭
🎶now it all begins🎶
written in the stars and all that, I love my OTP
More importantly though, I love Lois Lane she's everything and she deserves all the love in the world.
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babybammargera · 7 months ago
Text
You're supposed to be rivals Pt.2
Bf bam x fem skater gf
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(this is the vibe i imagine)
Somehow you've managed to drag Bam out of bed early so he can go with you to the promo shoot your manager is insisting on. You had April help you with your hair first, now your boyfriend is sitting on the bathroom counter watching you do your makeup as if it's the most interesting thing he's ever seen. “Babe I feel like I don't tell you this enough but you're so hot.” You lean over to kiss him leaving him with bright red lipstick that you wipe off with the sleeve of your sweatshirt before he forgets “I've gotta get dressed and you need to fix your bed head before we leave.” He looks in the mirror before following you back into his bedroom, “Well if you didn't want my hair to be this messy you wouldn't have your hands tangled in it for hours every night.” You roll your eyes and start to get dressed, “Keep it up Margera and that won't happen again for a while.” He steals a kiss and actually starts to get ready himself, “Okay okay no need to make threats, especially when I have to look at you like this all day.” You smile and pull on a pair of socks not wanting to have to wear heels the whole way to the shoot, “Thankfully I have skate shoes in your car. This is really impractical like who's gonna skate dressed like this?” You shrug grabbing your nice heels and he grabs his keys and guides you out of the room, “impractical but hot.” The two of you get in his car and head to the shoot, as he parks the car you touch up your makeup in the rearview mirror and can feel his pretty blue eyes burning holes into you, “Bammy you’re staring more than usual.” He smiles and looks over his sunglasses at you, “I can’t help it babe, I mean you’re always hot and this is different.” You roll your eyes taking off your socks and replace them with the tall black heels, “Just don’t get too used to it babe this is wayyy too much effort to be a common occurrence.” You pull him into a quick kiss then climb out of the car, he rushes to your side like a puppy still eyeing you up and down as he slips his hand into yours. Your manager rolls his eyes the moment he spots you and rushes over, “About time you got here come on!” Adjusting your bodysuit you make a face behind his back as you follow him to the skate ramps, “this whole thing was your idea so don’t complain it took so long for me to get ready. I’m here, I look hot let’s do this.” You’re rushed onto the makeshift set and handed a skateboard to pose with, the photographer hyping you up as Bam stands next to her grinning with his eyes glued to you the entire time and not so sneakily taking pictures on his phone as well. Once she shoot is over you sigh and sit down on one of the boards and kick off your heels, Bam strides over with your socks and your “emergency”pair of DCs (skate shoes) from his car, “we could go home and have a real skate sesh on the ramps if you want but my one request is that you keep the outfit on for a while.” You smile and he helps you up after you put your shoes on, “I think I can work with that.” As you kiss him your manager walks up with his arms full of boards, “ before you even say anything I don’t care about you two just don’t let it affect your skating and remember on completion days you two hate each other from the moment you enter the event until you skate, understood?” Bam tries to pretend he’s listening but you know he’s not. You nod at your manager and he pushes the 5 boards into Bam’s arms, “These are yours, you’re free to go home and be out of my hair for the day.” Bam cracks up a bit and mumbles, “you mean lack of hair.” Your manager shoots him a look, “you said something?” You both stifle laughter and turn towards where he parked. As soon as you get to the car you punch his arm, “Really Bam.” His smile matches yours and he tosses the boards into the back seat, “What? I’m not wrong, Dico has more hair than that guy!”
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banannabethchase · 1 year ago
Note
5 for matt & hangman
Checkins
Dialogue 5: “Right now?! That’s unique, even for you!”
~
Adam looks miserable as they make their way to the EVP locker room, one arm around Nick's shoulders and the other one limp next to him. It's all Matt can do to stay quiet. Talking doesn't feel helpful right now.
He pushes open their door and watches anxiously as Adam lowers himself onto the couch.
"How are you?" Matt has to ask.
Adam shrugs, a hesitant smile on his lips. "Been better. Not the first time a former friend beat me up on television." His grin turns a little mean.
"Okay, well, you don't need to add to it." He sits on the arm of the chair. "Do you feel okay? Physically?"
Adam nods and rolls his shoulder. "I'll be fine." He wiggles. "That dick punch fucked me up, though." He winces as he shifts. "Uno did not hold back."
"You two hang here," Nick says, folding his arms across his chest. "I gotta go check in with Tony after all that."
He shuts the door and Matt's left with Adam, who doesn't look like he's in pain, exactly, but he doesn't look happy.
Matt slowly slides himself onto the couch next to Adam, resting his head on Adam's shoulder as gently as he can. "Hi."
"Hey." Adam wraps an arm around Matt's waist, which is a good sign. No arm damage. Nothing wrong with his shoulder, probably nothing in the ribs. "You good?"
"I'm good," Matt says. He rests his hand on Adam's thigh. No twitch, no tensing up. His leg is probably fine. He runs his hand along Adam's thigh, watching for any sign of injury.
"Right now?" Adam asks. "That's unique even for you." Matt turns to see Adam smiling. "I mean, blood, sure but we've never had sex right after I got hit in the balls."
Matt blinks. "Huh?" He stares at Adam. "I'm making sure you aren't injured, doofus, without you figuring it out." He huffs. "You're always so stupid stoic, if you know I'm checking you it's always 'I'm fine, let's go get food.' So I had to get creative."
Adam's expression shifts. "You check me for injuries?"
Matt nods. "Every time."
"I thought you've been feeling me up this whole time!" Adam says. "I thought you suddenly got really horny after matches."
Matt laughs and shakes his head. "No, but I'm not complaining." He falls back on the couch. "Now you'll know I'm checking you all the time."
"You don't have to."
"No, I do," Matt says, as firm as he can make it. "You don't take care of yourself and you pretend you're fine when you're not. So somebody's got to make sure you aren't working yourself into the dirt."
Adam sighs. "Come here."
Matt leans in and curls up against Adam's chest, listening for any hints of distress.
"You're doing it again," Adam singsongs, running his hands along Matt's back.
Matt checks Adam's arms. "Deal with it."
"You know," Adam says. "I do have something that hurts. The only thing, really."
Matt stares at him. "Is this your bad attempt at a dick joke?"
Adam drops his head back, laughing hard enough to get his curls bouncing around his face. "It was right there!"
"You are the worst," Matt mutters. "Also, I think I accidentally made myself horny after matches."
"Pavlovian conditioning," Adam snickers.
"What?"
"Never mind." Adam makes grabby hands. "Just take your pants off."
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aydann-runs · 1 year ago
Text
Michael grins manically as Hank’s fist connects with his jaw.  He can tell by the ache already settling in that it's going to leave one hell of a bruise.
“Is that all you got?” he taunts.  “Your girlfriend throws a better punch than you do.  She does lotsa stuff better than you.”
Michael sees the next swing coming and moves with it, but it still catches his nose enough to make it bleed.  He swipes the back of his hand across his upper lip and considers his next move.  It’s a busy Friday night at the Wild Pony, and his little interaction with Hank in the parking lot has drawn a crowd.  It won’t be long before Deputy Big Damn Hero arrives and hauls his ass to the drunk tank.  He considers letting Hank knock him out just so he doesn’t have to listen to another one of Max’s sanctimonious lectures.  As tempting as that option is, he’d never willingly give up that much control.  At least if he’s conscious, he can let himself out of the drunk tank as soon as Max leaves.
Michael doesn’t even think Hank sees him at this point.  He’d been pretty drunk when he caught Michael making out with Lindsay in the bathroom, and between the alcohol and the rage, Hank isn’t tracking too well.  It makes Hank's next punch go wide, and he stumbles, barely managing to keep his feet.  It would be so easy for Michael to use his telekinesis to make Hank overbalance.  But even drunk and reckless, Michael isn’t that much of a dumbass.
He wipes away more of the blood flowing down his face.  He can hear the sirens and knows it’s only a matter of moments before The Deputy arrives, so he takes one final shot.  “I’d say I hope you’re better in bed than in a fight, but sadly, I’ve heard that’s not true.”
This time, Hank's blow catches him in the stomach.  Michael's still doubled-over trying to catch his breath when he hears Max ordering the crowd away, so he's not surprised when, a moment later, Max's hand lands on his shoulder.  He shakes it off and forces himself upright.  When he looks around, most of the onlookers are gone, leaving him essentially alone with Max.  Even Hank had the wherewithal to make himself scarce.  Great.
“Deputy!  Did you come all the way out here just for me?” he drawls with just the right amount of cocky attitude to really piss Max off.  The effect is diminished somewhat by the blood still trickling from his nose.
“What the hell is going on with you lately, Michael?” Max asks, voice tight like he's trying not to yell.  “Last week it was Wyatt Long, now Hank?”
Oh, so we're jumping right into it then.
“I guess Roswell gets boring sometimes.  Just trying to liven things up a bit.  Someone's gotta keep you deputies busy,” he answers.  He tries to smirk but it hurts, so he settles for rolling his eyes instead.
“I thought we were past all this,” Max says, sighing.  “It's been a good seven or eight months since the last time I had to bring you in, and now it's been three times in the past two weeks.  What the hell, Michael?  I won't always be here to help you.  What if someone else responded to the call?  You might have ended up in County lockup instead of just the drunk tank.”
Annnnd, there it is.
“I don't need your help, Max!  I've never needed your help!” Michael says, throwing up his hands and turning to walk away from having this argument again.
Michael isn't surprised when Max catches him by the arm.  He's always had a pretty good sense of his surroundings, thanks largely to the esteemed New Mexico foster care system.  He is surprised when he feels cool metal close around his wrist.
“What the actual fuck, Max?  Are you arresting me?  I didn't even throw a punch!”
“You never do, Michael,” Max says wearily as he secures the handcuffs around his other arm.
Michael lets Max march him to the patrol car and doesn't even try to free himself.  He can do that any time, so he might as well wait until he's not out in the open.
Once Max gets him into the back seat he leans on the door frame so they're eye-to-eye.  “Someone has to save you from yourself, Michael.  If the only way I can do that is to lock you up, then that's what I'll do.”
“You know what?  Screw you, Max.  Stop fucking trying to save me.  I don't want you to try and save me!” he yells at the person who's the closest thing to a brother as he's ever had.
Michael risks it then and uses his telekinesis to wrench the door closed, leaving Max staring at him through the reinforced glass of the window.  After a long moment, Max just shakes his head and looks away.
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aajjks · 9 months ago
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i made up my mind 🙂
TC!dad!JK
tears falls from yeonjin’s face “quit acting like you didn’t write me, jungkook. you know you did! THE ONLY REASON YOU’RE WITH HER IS BECAUSE I’M INFERTILE!!!!! WE PROMISED TO HAVE A FAMILY TOGETHER!!”
everyone says to be mad at the man not the woman because it was he who stepped out of the marriage and made a choice to throw it all always. here you are, mad at the man but you should know jungkook would never EVER cheat on you. yes, this is loads of evidence stacked against him and the two of you have to work on trusting one another but dammit, you love this man so much.
you don’t even care about whether or not yeonjin is telling the truth because in a blind rage you push the woman onto the ground, get on top of her, and punch the woman in the face repeatedly. however, if you think yeonjin isn’t going down without a fight then you’ve severely underestimated her. she rolls over on top of you and deals blows of her own, even scratching your face with her long nails.
“OUCH!!!!! YOU FUCKING BITCH!!!” yeonjin curses as she lets go of your locks of hair to look at the bleeding bite mark you dealt to her arm. once you’re free of her grasp, you kick yeonjin right in the face but before you could kick her again, jungkook gets ahold of you and instructs the guards to lock yeonjin in the dungeon.
“GET OFF OF ME JUNGKOOK!!! I’M NOT FINISHED FUCKING HER UP!! LET GO!!! LET GO OF ME RIGHT NOW OR I’M FIGHTING YOU TOO!!!” you kick and scream in jungkook’s arms.
“oh my—what happened to mom?” jinseoul panics but jungkook tells him to make sure all of his siblings are in their rooms including him and hyunjin before leading you to his office.
“I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF EVERYONE UNDERESTIMATING ME AROUND HERE INCLUDING YOU!! you always say i never believe you, i never fight for you, WELL I FUCKING DID! if you want me to fight jungkook i will fucking fight. this is what you wanted right? a wife that will ride for you until the wheels fall off and that’s what i’m doing because i love you. i’d kill for you and i bet she couldn’t. maybe if you get out my way, i could kill her!!” you scream at jungkook who is shocked, upset, and angry at your behavior but he’s impressed at how well you held your own when fighting yeonjin.
your hand touches the bleeding cuts on your face from yeonjin’s nails and it only makes you want to beat her ass even more.
you didn’t fuck her up enough to your liking but of course jungkook won’t let you go until you’ve calmed down and listen to what he has to say.
~🫧
What the fuck just happened he has no idea.
As he is staring at your scratched up and bloody face. You’re screaming at him to let you go on and finish her off but he’s not going to let you do that.
You’re the mother of his nine children and he doesn’t really want you to have blood on your hands, and it flutters his heart that you would kill for him, but you don’t have to. He believes you. But that bitch deserved to be beat up and you did a damn good job at that.
Although he is not sure at how and where did you learn to fight like that but he’s gotta be careful around you now, he’s touching your face. Jungkooks fuming because she hurt you too. “Oh baby… shhh just calm down. I know you love me and I know you’d kill for me but you don’t have to.” he tries to assure you, but he’s not sure that you still believe him or not.
“I just need to know that if you believe me or her? Yn sweetheart you know in your mind that I did not write those letters and I do not know where she got them from.”
For the first time in his life, he has stopped someone from fighting. And it’s you because he always wants to protect you.
He has no doubt that you were going to kill her and you would’ve if he was a little late. “Yn sweetheart. I’m so sorry that you had to deal with her. I don’t even know how and why she got here.” he looks into your eyes, and he hopes that you even see the sincerity in them. “let me call the doctor and have them look at your wounds. Please just calm down.” He breathes out, holding you really close to him. 
Your heartbeat is a mess right now because you’re really angry and your body feels really hot and you’re scary right now
But so damn hot too but maybe it’s not the right time to let you know that.
This is so weird because your roles are now reversed because you’re always the one calming him down when he gets into fights or kills someone so he’s not sure at how to go on about this without making you even more mad.
He honestly didn’t think you had it in you. And it’s so weird because for the first time he actually feels loved and protected by you.
“i’ll deal with her on my own. You don’t have to do anything just focus on our children and the boy because he’s innocent!” he hopes that you won’t get angry
“Also, Baby..” he breaths out, staring into your anger filled eyes. “I didn’t know that you had it in you… I swear to God you have me so hard right now.” He whispers into your ear, holding you close to his chest.
What can he do? He’s a hopeless man when it comes to you.
It was really hot with the way you were on top of her, punching her face, he was a little shocked, but soon he was there to stop the fight, even though he wishes that it could’ve gone on for a little bit more but it’s better if you don’t kill anyone.
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shaampoo · 2 years ago
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So im kinda writing another fic (damnit this stuff gonna kill me but its like a drug i cant stop it jlksjk) where Emmet shares a body with Rex but in tlm 1 and it kinda made me wonder what if Rex and Emmet shared a body in Apocalypseburg before tlm 2 happened? cause imagine if everyone knew
let's assume they've been sharing a body in tlm1 and now they're in Apocalypseburg since everyone there is like really obsessed with being tough they like Rex more than Emmet like if they're with Rex they're ok with him but with Emmet? The only reason they arent hostile with him is because they know if they were Rex would knock their light out so imagine if Emmet knew that people felt this way about him and his friends only let Rex go to patrols so he just lets Rex go out and do whatever and he mostly only takes control when he's home or whenever he's with Lucy and his friends cause imagine how much his confidence took a hit from knowing that.
Uh well yall probably already know im gonna write a oneshot about this
Rex went home after a long day out on patrol with the others, he stretched and went inside his apartment, and closed the door
Swishh
Emmet went to the bookshelf and pulled out a book and went to the couch to sit and read, as always Rex noticed that Emmet was sad. Whenever he tried to talk to Emmet about it he just brushed it off, saying that he was just having an off day
Hey, Broski you okay? Rex asked
"Yeah Rex im fine," Emmet said "Probably just having an off day that's all"
Oh please you have an "Off day" everyday Rex said Just tell me, Broski
"Rex is fine," Emmet said
Swishh
Rex threw the book behind him
"No way" Rex said "Listen you've been putting this off for long enough just tell me"
Emmet stayed silent
"I'll make you drink black coffee for a month straight if you don't" Rex said
Fine Emmet said It's just people like you more
"Well you shouldn't care what people think of you" Rex said "Plus you haven't even hung around them recently haven't you noticed that they're actually tolerable?"
Well yeah but thats because you're the one talking to them! Plus you and i both know that they're only nice to me because I share a body with you! They know you'll probably punch them if they're mean
"Listen just dont let them get to you" Rex said "They're a buncha nobodies,"
Its not just them even our friends like you more! Emmet said, ever since they've been sharing a body they've been sharing feeling too, so Rex could feel Emmet's sadness and slight bitterness
"They just need me for patrols," Rex said "Its not like they're gonna ditch you completely" Emmet was silent for a few seconds
Its just im scared that if you weren't with me they would just ditch me Rex's eyebrows flew up
"What are you talking about?" Rex said, "Listen i know they did that to me, but in the next few years they would never ditch you and I'll make sure of that!"
... Emmet was silent It's just if you're in control then maybe they would go and look for us...I mean at least I know they like you. In your timeline, it was just me and they never came, maybe if I or at least you were tough they would come back, right?
"Listen, you made me realize that they would've came for me if they knew" Rex said "So i guess i gotta do the same for you, I'm calling the others because one you guys need group therapy second you need to let them know how you feel" rex got up and went for their phone
Swishh
"No!" Emmet said "Listen Rex I'll tell them when I'm ready"
Broski. Rex said If you put this off its gonna get worse
"Let me at least think about it okay?" Emmet asked "It's late they would be annoyed if i called them this late" Emmet went to bed and could tell Rex was planning something
----------------
Rex woke up around 4 am, he was a light sleeper unlike Emmet.
"Alright wheres the phone?" Rex said searching the house, for some reason whenever Rex or Emmet was awake the other wasn't awake until later. Finally, Rex found his phone, he debated whether or not he should call the others but decided that if he didn't Emmet would just put this off forever. He went to his friends group chat and made a group meeting, the phones rang and everyone answered
"Ugh Emmet or Rex or both of you what are you doing calling this early?" Lucy said
"Yeah a girl need her beauty sleep" Unikitty said, then yawned
"Yeah you kinda disturbed my stargaz- i mean brooding" Benny said
"Hey guys Rex here sorry bout callin ya this late" Rex said "Actually I'm not, but anyways its about Emmet, he's kinda asleep right now"
"How does that even work?" Benny said
"Dunno" Rex said "And i kinda don't think about it, but back to the topic" Rex proceeded to tell them about the conversation he and Emmet had
"Oh wow" Benny said "He's been feeling this way the entire time?"
"I always kind of thought Emmet was a bit sad lately" Lucy said "But i didn't think it was because of this"
"I know!" Unikitty said "Let's visit Emmet to cheer him up"
"Yeah!" Benny said "It's the least we can do"
Swishh
Emmet almost collapsed when he found that he wasn't in bed, though he had plenty experience to know what to do
"Woah" He said as he hit the floor
Or maybe not
"Uh Rex what were-" he spotted the phone that was on call "Rex...?"
"Hey Emmet" Unikitty said "We're coming to your apartment later kay?"
"Uh sure" Emmet hung up the call before glaring at Rex in the mirror
"What did you tell them?" Emmet asked
Listen you would've just put off the problem forever Rex said I should know because I've been doing that when I was you, in fact, i was in this position before but i didn't have anybody to make the call for me so i just ended up putting it off forever
"..." Well Rex had a point Emmet would've just put it off, after all it would've been a 'weak' and 'pathetic' thing to do...
When did asking for help become something that made him look weak?
There was a knock on the door and Emmet opened it to see all his friends
"Oh" Emmet wasn't ready to come by this fast, he expected that he would have enough time to comprehend what was probably gonna happen "You guys were fast"
"Well yeah we wouldn't miss this" Lucy said giving Emmet a kiss on the cheek
"Now how about we sit down?" Benny said, when they were sat Benny began "Listen, Emmet, Rex told us that you felt a bit...unliked"
"To quote him" Lucy said "He said 'Emmet feels like that without him we would just leave you in a moments notice'"
"I-" Emmet hesitated, did Rex really have to phrase it that way "I wouldn't put it that way"
But its true Rex said you need to be honest with them Emmet Emmet sighed
"It's just you guys seem to like him more" Emmet confessed lacing his hands together, sometimes making his fingers go up and down, like how he always does when he's nervous, "And everyone else like's him more, i..." Emmet paused "Well Rex was me in some point of time, of course you guys know this, and you guys know that in his time it was just me, and well..." Emmet looked away from them "You guys know that you guys from that time just never found him and I'm scared that its because he wasn't 'tough' enough. That you guys didn't like him, that you guys just didn't like me" Emmet tried hard not to cry, it wasn't 'tough' after all, but his hands shook whenever he stopped making his fingers moved
Lucy put her hand on his, she could feel his hands shaking, she looked at him with pity, a look he was used to when he was the one in control, but this time she hugged him
"Oh Emmet..." Lucy said "Im so sorry we made you feel this way"
"Yeah" Unikitty said "I don't know how we can fix it but we'll find a way, we always do" Unnikitty joined the hug, soon everyone was hugging emmet, who hugged them right back
Told ya Rex said
"Shut up Rex we're having a moment" Emmet said, laughing, everyone laughed too, while they didn't hear Rex they knew what Rex probably said.
-------------------
The others already went home after confirming that Emmet was fine. Emmet sat on the couch
"Hey, Rex?"
Yeah?
"Thanks," Emmet said "I really needed that"
Anytime Ems anytime
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galacticwildfire · 1 year ago
Text
Fire Meet Gasoline | Poe Dameron
Eight
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Poe Dameron x Solo Original Character
Hope Solo’s haunted by the night the temple burned. Having gone rogue she hunts the First Order in search of answers until a fateful encounter with Poe Dameron brings her back to the Resistance and Leia puts her daughter under his command to find Luke Skywalker.
Word count: 9k
Tags/warnings: slowburn is slowburning, flashbacks, string theory, attachment issues, teenage sapphic angst in flashback, punching senators and stealing ships, hux being a dramatic opportunist and exposing family secrets, solo's stalling horribly, cursing, panic attack/ptsd episode, mother-daughter cover ups, references to Freefall and Bloodline
All my stories are written for adults with adult themes, I use tags but read at your discretion.
A/N: the flashbacks included are from the prequel I've published on ao3 and wattpad. It's a work in progress but mostly complete.
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Hope
Poe and I prepare ourselves in our EVA suits as we go over the plan one last time.
"I'm still a little mad I can't use my own one of these," I remark as he helps me seal the ill-fitting dome around my head, having to take one of the Resistance issue suits onboard instead of my custom one, but the visors in these unlike my own are tinted, rendering us both unrecognisable. The supposedly breathable ventilation garments underneath only providing so much comfort in the white bags we're wearing. "I'll need to get one with a tinted helmet to save wearing these damn things."
"If this becomes a regular thing I'll be getting one made as well," he says as I return the favour in sealing his suit, taking a look at his face before ensuring his own tinted helmet's sealed. At least that eliminates one problem.
I'd been prepared for a fight when I stepped on board, but he's surprised me. He really has.
"Hurtling ourselves through the vacuum of space? Let's hope so," I grin, a little too excited for that part of the plan.
And maybe I don't mind the fact it's with him. Especially after I'd remembered something, a conversation I'd overheard between Dad and Lando talking about Poe's father.
"It's gotta be twenty years since I've seen Kes, heard he cut everyone off after his wife died," Lando had said, the name Shara Bey having been familiar to me. "It's sick, spending years away from your kid fighting only to die like that after the war was finished."
"Yeah," Dad said heavily. "Leia wrote the condolence letter, messed her up for a while since Ben was only a few years younger than their son. I can tell you she was a hell of a lot more careful with her missions after that. It's a shame, Kes was one of my best men on Endor. In the twenty years I've only heard from him once and that was when his kid ran away from home," Dad paused, struggling to remember the details at the ancient age of sixty. "He was in a panic and reaching out to any contact he could think of, turns out the kid had gotten in with a group of smugglers, or spice runners, one of the two. Kes thought I could be some help."
Ben had been there, stuffing his face with food but listening enough to take a jab at Dad and his past that Ben had always seemed to be ashamed of. "Wonder why."
"Anyways," Dad said, hardly phased by Ben at that point. "I put Kes on the right track though it seems if the kid's in the Navy now. Shara was a hell of a pilot, saved Leia's life during Cinder, only right the boy would take after her."
I look at Poe a little differently having remembered that conversation, knowing that maybe Mom had her reasons for putting us together on this mission. That he isn't the squeaky clean golden boy I'd imagined him to be, but something deeper, more flawed. 
Someone I could actually find common ground with. 
"I don't suppose you've ever ejected in space before?" he asks, unaware of my revelation. 
"Can't say I have but there's a first time for everything."
Even with the helmet obstructing his face I can feel his grin, wishing I could see it, but it's important that they're properly sealed upon takeoff since the alternative is suffocating in space. 
"Alright princess let's go steal that yacht," he says as we head over to the ships but reminds me "This time-"
"No prisoners, threatening or interrogations I got it," I finish but have to ask "Can I at least punch that senator since he can't see my face?"
I'm suddenly glad I can't see his face as he exclaims "Solo-"
"He called the General a terrorist," I say, having remembered just where I'd seen the senator before and the grudge I'd almost forgotten. 
His tune changes then. "Maybe, now let's get moving."
I grin to myself beneath the helmet and BB-8 and R2 stand between us and our ships, still reluctant to let us go without them. Poe bends down to BB-8's level and rubs his head as he protests. 
"I'm going to be sitting in a Z-95 cockpit wearing an EVA suit," Poe tells his droid, speaking to him with a warmth that's unfortunately rare between an owner and their droid. "And you want to sit on my lap?" BB-8's not entirely opposed to the thought, sulking as a child would. Droids have their own personalities, but BB-8's is quite unusual, although I would assume it's manifested as a result of Poe treating him like a child, or a pet, instead of a thing made to serve organics and carry out complex tasks. That is certainly a quality I can't find fault with, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't endearing. "I'm going to come back. I always do."
I look at R2 now, who's somehow even more reluctant to leave me, he makes a sound that resembles a cry. The same sound he makes if I ever tell him to stay with the ship.
"I promise, I'm going to come right back to you," I tell R2 and rub his dome. "You're my best friend, you know I'd never leave you."
The thought of leaving R2 alone breaks my heart, he'd have Mom, but I can't make him suffer through losing me after Luke and Anakin. Thankfully he was never that attached to Ben, especially considering I had to stop R2 from stunning him once or twice.
R2's always had my safety at the forefront of his priorities, and I know it stems from being afraid to lose me like the others. "Don't worry R2, I promise that you'll be right there with me in spirit all the way."
Reluctantly I leave him, Poe having to physically nudge me alone towards the ships at the cry R2 makes. If it's true that owners impress upon their droids, I know he's taken on my fear of being abandoned. 
"He'll be alright, they both will," Poe promises me, as an x-wing pilot he wouldn't be used to flying without his astromech either. "And we'll make it back to them."
It's then Mom emerges, coming to stand beside R2 and keeps a gentle hand to keep him in place as she bids us farewell, her voice is strong but I feel the nerves that leave her struggling to maintain her composure. 
But as always, she does. "May the force be with you."
Those are words I haven't heard in a very long time, and finally I know I actually have something to return to. Which is why I can't fail. 
~
The seven hours we wait for that damn yacht to come out of hyperspace gives me time to think. Too much time. Especially since we have to maintain complete radio silence for security measures.
But for once my thoughts aren't all bad.
I'd fully expected him to not even want to look at me, and yet I couldn't tear my eyes away from his. I can't remember the last time I'd had a conversation with someone without it resulting in a fight, especially not with someone who's sat and listened to me with the intent of understanding and not just correcting or trying to convince me to do something.
He had every reason to turn his back on me, but he hasn't and I can't help but be stunned even now. After all, I've been condemned as a Sith by people who've known me far longer for far less.
Those last days at the temple come to mind as they often do when I'm left alone in my own thoughts for too long, back when I'd grappled with the darkness almost as severely as Ben had. 
I'd been reluctant to leave Mom after the scandal, but she encouraged me to finish my training. I devoted myself to it until the holonews broadcast of Mom's colleague being assassinated five feet away from her had sent me into a panic attack. I'd sought comfort, reassurance, to which Aylee had merely told me to distance myself from politics as Luke had despite the fact Mom could have just as easily been the one who was killed. It had been the most recent of her lectures regarding my emotions and attachments and frankly I couldn't listen to it for a moment longer. 
Ben had even failed to reassure me when I'd gone running to him, his own anger towards Mom stronger than any concern for her wellbeing, and I'd found myself talking with Luke in the temple when he caught me trying to sneak back in. It was the last civil conversation we'd have with one another. 
"Mom could have been assassinated," I stated and he lowered his eyes as I let it out. "Don't tell me my reaction is out of proportion or that I should just separate myself from politics because I won't!"
He raised his hands in his defence as he spoke slowly. "I wasn't going to, I was just going to ask how you are."
We'd been at odds with my anger towards him for leaving Mom to face the scandal alone, for forgiving Vader, for holding me back. It had consumed me to the point Ben had to intervene when I'd returned to the temple. Yet he still tried to extend a peace offering to me. 
"Exhausted."
"Really? I hadn't noticed the way your brother has had you training from dawn until dusk every day like you're preparing for war," he remarked but realised with my silence there were things I hadn't told him. "Hope, this scandal and what's come of it is not an indicator of another war."
"But it is," I said and found my voice thin. "I've seen it Luke, in visions. I've seen myself shot and hiding behind cover with R2 my only chance of making it out alive from an enemy I couldn't see. I don't know what's coming, but I know something is."
He reached for my arm and inspected the minor burns from the training droids I'd rewired. "And so getting shot at is your solution?"
"I can't afford to get stunned, it knocks me out for too long when I could be training."
He nodded in fond amusement. "Has anyone ever told you patience is a virtue? Because I know your parents sure haven't."
I couldn't find it in myself to be angry with him considering how true it was. "You know patience isn't in my blood."
"It's not," he admitted. "And believe it or not it wasn't in mine either, but I had to learn it as part of the discipline it takes to become a Jedi."
"But I'm already a Jedi."
"You are a Jedi padawan, yes," he said, sitting down on one of the benches and inviting me to sit with him, and surprisingly enough I accepted. "But not yet a Jedi."
Despite our differences Luke was a good master, perhaps not the master for me, but he was my uncle and the counsel he gave me that night has stuck with me over the years. Even if I'd forgotten it the moment I'd returned to the room I shared with Aylee and found her waiting for me. 
She had hardly been able to look at me after I'd become Ben's apprentice, but that was only one of the many things that drove a wall of beskar between us. I'd seen first hand the fall of the Jedi when I'd visited the temple on Coruscant, having pieced together that the complacency and arrogance of the council made them so blind they wouldn't be able to sense a Sith lord if he was standing right in front of him. 
Which as it seems was the case after all. 
But she believed that the fall of the order came solely as a result of the Jedi straying from the code, instead of seeing their fall as the complex cataclysm of war, ideology and failed leadership that it was. That blood is foremost on the hands of the Jedi council, the Sith could never have risen and orchestrated a massacre right in front of them if they weren't so blind. 
But she never saw it that way, and I could only take so much of her righteous devotion despite Luke's advice to let us interpret the force and the code how we saw fit. 
"I'm sorry," she began. "I shouldn't have been so insensitive."
"I'd use the word cold," I said and let free what I'd held back considering her promises to me before everything was exposed. The promise we would finally be together, before she decided it disagreed with the code she'd begun to follow. "It's all you've seemed to be since I've come back. You haven't looked at me the same and don't pretend it's just because you've gone and radicalised yourself with scriptures."
"Radicalised?" she repeated in disbelief before shaking her head. "I thought you'd be more cultured than to confuse devotion with radicalisation."
"I'm intelligent enough to see one leads to the other."
"Intelligent?" she scoffed "You're a lot of things Hope but intelligent isn't one of them." I huffed as she let her own grievances free. "You're arrogant and egotistical and impulsive and hotheaded and everything a Jedi shouldn't be, but you're the one who has an insane amount of power that should never have existed!"
"Oh bring it up with the force then!" I returned and couldn't help but laugh at how twisted everything had become. "It created me, it created the man I came from, so if my existence offends you bring it up with the thing that made me this way! You can't devote yourself to something and then criticise it, that's not what the scriptures say is it? No, they preach blind devotion and lack of free thinking, so if you're going to go and follow the old ways then do it properly. You might think I'm ignorant but at least I'm not blind!"
"Your existence does not offend me," she gritted out, her blue skin flushed purple with the heat that came to her face. "The way you've been acting has. Like you can come back and suddenly master the force in a fortnight whilst contributing nothing to the temple or its upkeep. At least your brother instructs the younglings when Master Luke allows it and does his best to help, you care nothing for the other students or the temple. In fact I don't think you care about anyone but yourself with how you've galavanted around the galaxy whilst I sat here sending transmission after transmission because you were missing and not returning anyone's calls after you got yourself expelled from university and-"
"I'm sorry, I was a little bit too busy finding out my grandfather was Darth Vader and getting shot at!" I yelled and that finally shut her up. "Something you've treated like it's been nothing-"
"Oh I know it hasn't been nothing because you are not the same person that left this temple," she said and finally confessed "We can all feel the shadow that follows you, it's suffocating me having to sleep in the same room as it."
"I'm sorry you're too weak to have to sense what I've lived with for years!" I yelled, my anger finally showing itself. "This hasn't just come out of nowhere Aylee, it's always been there! And I'm sorry I'm so suffocating to even be in the same room with so go kriff of with your scriptures and bullshit if you can't stand me!" She panicked as I raised my voice and reached for me in an attempt to calm me but I swatted her hands away. "No, you started this so you can finish it."
She swallowed hard as she looked at me. "I can feel the dark side in you Hope, we all can."
"Maybe I don't fear the dark side as you do," I finally said, having lived with it for so long and watched something akin to fear fill her eyes. "What is it your scriptures say? Fear leads to anger, anger to hate, and hate to-"
"To what you are," she finished, her voice wavering. "Or what I know you'll become if you continue down this path. Just because there is darkness in you does not mean you have to embrace it as Vader did. Although sometimes I look in your eye and wonder if it's too late for that."
I searched her eyes, my closest friend, someone who was more than that, and yet in that moment she felt like nothing to me. It was spite that drove me to kiss her, spite that was only further driven by the way she physically recoiled, something she'd never done before despite the isolated kisses we'd shared over the years.
And I knew there was no coming back as I looked her in the eye, because everything she said was true about the darkness that had found its way into my heart.
"You have no idea how dark it gets."
At the age of seventeen I was a tad melodramatic, perhaps I still am, but I wasn't wrong. 
That wouldn't be our last fight, that came the day the temple burned, but it was the one that convinced me everything Ben had ever told me was true. I mourned her, but I don't know if I ever felt the same towards her after that fight. I'd decided in the aftermath I never wanted to let anyone that close again, never wanted to feel the cold touch of someone I'd relied on for warmth. 
In fact it's ironic that that fight was the most passion she'd ever showed me. In her mind romantic feelings were acceptable, or at least until Luke granted her permission to the old order's surviving scriptures, and in her eyes anything that bordered on passion was dangerous. 
Meanwhile when I think of Poe... it's a silly feeling, one I should be violently rejecting for my own sake if nothing else.
But...
I bang my head back against the seat as if that could somehow numb my thoughts, especially when I find myself playing with my hands, remembering his thumb moving against mine. If Poe Dameron is anything, he's one smooth bastard. Probably not the brightest if he's using those charms on me of all people, but admirably brave. He'll need to be to get through this mission.
And finally I feel it.
My engines are the first to ignite a split second before the Hevurion Grace comes out of hyperspace and I'm off. Poe follows only a moment after and as expected they broadcast their distress signal the second they get sight of us, and that's when I activate the control on the wristbrace of my suit, the timer being displayed out of the corner of my eye.
Eight minutes.
Without any hesitation I happily fire my concussion missiles into the yacht and Poe follows suit a second after. Defensive flares activate to cause the first missile to explode prematurely as they attempt an evasive manoeuvre, but they aren't fast enough as my second missile penetrates their shields and cuts power to the yacht while the impact of Poe's missiles ensure that whoever's inside is no doubt scared for their lives.
Poe's ship boosts forward as he activates his throttle, heading sharply for the yacht and I do the same, double checking my gear satchel is secure along with my sidearm as we prepare to eject.
"Fucking gloves," I mutter as I try to make the preparations and put the ship into autopilot with the damn oversized gloves of the EVA suit, confused for a moment when I don't hear R2 talking to me but remember he's not there.
Our ships align with the belly of the yacht, keeping an eye on the range finder as I fumble with the harness around my chest to release it, not having accounted for the difficulty of my own damn space suit. It seems Poe's in a similar dilemma as he hasn't ejected yet either and I'm slamming my fist down on the ejector plate as I reach the very limit of the acceptable range to eject and wrench the handle back as the ship's alarms scream at me, hearing the bolts on the canopy detonate the moment before I'm ejected.
I've made some emergency exists sure but never in the vacuum of space, so when I'm thrown into it I'm truly not sure what to expect, but flying through space with nothing holding me down is a feeling I don't think I'm going to forget any time soon. The momentum of the starfighter hurtles me towards the yacht, the optical illusion makes it appear as if it's the yacht hurtling towards me and not the other way around. So perhaps the sheer speed at which I'm about to hit the yacht occurs to me a little late and I'm cursing as I ignite the momentum thrusters on my suit and bring my hands up, the force counteracting with the laws of physics to enable to me collide with the hull at a thud instead of with a crushed spine.
In panic I look back to see Poe about to make contact and bring my hand up to slow his collision, he seems to momentarily panic at whatever sensation he's feeling before making contact just below me, far more softly than he would have otherwise.
Under any other circumstances I would have liked to take in the vastness of space but we don't have the time and so I reach for one of the handholds, pulling myself towards the access hatch with ease, utilising the force to manoeuvre myself without gravity far easier than Poe is below me. But this is why I was brought on this mission, to ensure if one of us doesn't make it on time the other does.
But more importantly, to make sure we both make it out alive.
He catches up as I reach the access port, being the one hanging off the edge of it he pulls the fusion torch from his belt to give me and comes to my side as I begin breaking the seals, a quick look at the timer out of the corner in my eye informs me we're down to six minutes and fifty seconds by the time I've popped the last seal and Poe reaches to try to help me pull the door open, only to struggle with no gravity to balance our own weightlessness against the physical force needed to open the door. Five seconds into wrestling with the hatch is enough for me and I swat his hand away to use the strength of the force to pull it open. Poe jolts as the edge of the door hits my hand and I slither my way inside, reaching out to pull him in with me before slamming the door shut behind us and hear him call out through the viser as he takes the fusion torch from my hand.
"I'll seal the door, you get to the cockpit!"
The timer's down to six minutes thirty five, the ship's gravity transmitters are offline along with everything else as I begin moving down the ladder while he reseals the door. Everything's pitch black except for the floodlight attached to my helmet illuminating my way down but I was trained to do far more dangerous things blind.
The moment I feel my feet touch the ground he's following me down, hearing voices in the hall I switch on the speakers in the helmet and pull my blaster free. This being the part I've been most excited for.
Just as his feet hit the ground gravity and other operations come back online, light illuminating the way into the hall and we both have our blasters extended as we find only three people huddling together. Seem's the senator can't afford any more than a pilot and a servant.
I go to step forward but Poe puts a hand out to keep me back as he takes the lead on this one. 
"This ship is property of the Irving Boys," Poe announces, theirs and mine both it seems, the speakers of the suit distort his voice ensuring anonymity. 
But I can't help but hear the senator's voice in my head and every accusation he's thrown against Mom and I as I tilt my head towards him. 
"Do you know who I am!" the Senator splutters and I move forward, tearing off the damn oversized glove to grab him. "How dare-" he shuts up when I throw my fist into his face while Poe shoots at the deck, causing the pilot and the servant to scatter while I keep hold of the senator.
"Do you know how much ransom you'd be worth?" I ask the Senator before bringing my blaster up to his head, unable to help but put some fear into him after the bullshit he's spat as he chokes on the blood running into his mouth. "Or I could shut you up for good?"
"Now- now, let's not do anything too hasty!" he insists, holding up shaking hands as Poe aims his blaster at him for good measure. A little less righteous now he's having fun it seems. "I- I could-"
"I don't care," I say and shove him towards Poe as I remember the timer's still going down and we need to get out of here. "Throw him out the hatch."
'Wait- wait!" the Senator yells as Poe instead shoves him towards the escape pods where the rest of the undersized crew have gone and I run to the cockpit.
Five minutes thirty. This is good. This is good timing.
I'm ripping off the other glove to pull the preprogrammed data chip with the hyperspace co-ordinates out, along with dumping the rest of my own gear unceremoniously on the floor as Poe rushes back in, following suit in tugging off his gloves along with his helmet.
"They gone?"
"They're gone," he confirms, both of us sweaty from being trapped in those damn helmets for seven hours with our own body heat and recycled breath to keep us company. "How's it looking?"
"Good," I answer, although sparing no time in flicking controls as he goes to help get everything back online. "Just over five minutes on the timers and the engines should be back online within three minutes, the hyperdrive should be charged not long after. I'll get these booster cables fitted and bypass the motivator so the time to jump should be less than a minute once the engines are back online. We should have ninety seconds to spare before the Republic reach the system."
"Great, this is going good, great actually," he says to himself as much as me as I gather the parts and he calls out as I head for the door. "You know I didn't say you could hit him right?"
"You enjoyed it almost as much as I did," I shoot back and catch his grin before I run to the hyperdrive generator.
My movements are automatic as I attach the booster cables and make some not completely safe adjustments to bypass the motivator, but it should be good for two hyperspace jumps and we only have to make one. But with two minutes until the engines are even back online a wave of utter darkness washes over me and I run to one of the windows on the side of the ship only for my stomach to drop at the sight of two star destroyers.
The First Order.
"Solo!" Poe yells from the cockpit, still trying to get the engines online while alarms start to blare from the radar. "We have ships-"
"Star destroyers."
"Star destroyers?" He repeats and stammers "As in plural?"
"As in plural," I confirm as I manoeuvre the ship with what little propulsion it's still got so we're facing it head on, the sight only making the gravity of the situation hit harder. "Fuck."
"Fuck," he agrees, there's three minutes and twenty nine seconds on the timer, but the Republic's irrelevant now. What matters is how long until the engines and hyperdrive are online. "Looks like you were right."
"I really wish I wasn't," I say as I start fiddling with the controls and shake my head. "We've still got more than two minutes until the hyperdrive's charged and the engines aren't even online yet. Got any bright ideas?"
"Yeah, don't die," he answers, trying to bypass anything and everything to get those engines online as tie fighters descend from the destroyers but it's as I pull up it's identification everything changes.
"Wait-wait-"
"What?"
"It's the Finalizer," I realise and with that I'm slamming my hand down onto the console trying to send a transmission. "I can stall."
"How?" he exclaims, believing that destroying this ship and everything on it is their first priority, but if they know I'm onboard that changes everything.
"Jedi," I answer but he grabs my hand just before I can send it.
"They can't know it's us remember, complete deniability-"
"The Republic can't know it's us," I correct as the ties descend at an alarming speed.
"Really?" he exclaims, knowing this is the most explicit way I could possibly go against mission orders. "You're risking this on a technicality!"
"I'm sorry, what's worse? Getting blown up for nothing and failing the mission anyways or getting in a bit of trouble with the Republic for a hijacking!"
He looks at me in pure astonishment before making one last attempt at reasoning. "The General was very clear-"
"Oh shut up and let me talk my way out of this," I say and swat his hand away before sending the transmission, knowing my political value as a captive. "I'm too important for them to kill."
"Solo I swear-"
"Be a good flyboy and steer this while we wait for the hyperdrive to charge up huh?" I say, patting his offended face as we wait for them to accept it. "Let me take care of the First Order." He's stunned into silence as I take the data disk out of my pocket I'd intended to use to steal the data for myself and order him "Get the data and transfer it onto this, if this goes south get on an escape pod and get this to the Resistance. The First Order will want me more than that."
His face falls once he realises what my plan is but before he can object a transmission comes through "Heruvian Grace-"
"This is Hope Solo," I immediately spit out and a moment later the ties divert course, instead surrounding the ship instead of firing directly on it and Poe looks around in disbelief as I nod for him to go to the computers and get the data, very reluctantly he does as I order him.
"Hope Solo?" a surprised voice says and I immediately dislike it. "This is General Hux of the First Order. It is certainly a surprise to find a princess committing piracy."
"General Hux? I don't believe I've heard of you, and your intelligence must be pretty bad then, or you're out of the loop considering the twenty or so ties you sent after me last week," I say, knowing I can expose myself but not the Resistance. If I survive this I'll be the one dealing with the collateral in the senate regardless. "Hondo's gonna love this story. Two star destroyers just for me? I'm flattered."
Poe's face changes when he realises I'm throwing myself under the speeder to ensure this is seen as a rogue operation and there's a scoff on the other end. "The ego is a family trait I see."
So he does know Ben, and he knows exactly who he is.
"Pray tell, what the hell could be on this floating money pit that's so valuable?" I continue, stalling for time and very aware of the fact my brother's identity is unknown to most of high command, let alone a commander, and also the fact I have to ensure this is not mistaken as a Resistance operation. "I've been targeting it for weeks waiting to ambush and turn it into credits, but something tells me he must be a friend of yours."
"Really, General Organa didn't send you to hijack this ship?"
"Your intelligence is awfully terrible then after all if they can't tell you I haven't spoken to my mother in a year," I say, considering I'd returned to base only a week ago so I'm willing to bet their intelligence hasn't picked up on it. I look back at Poe and find him struggling with a firewall preventing him from accessing the data. He gives a grave shake of his head as we realise it will take the Resistance's own codebreakers to get into it, which means one of us escaping with the intelligence isn't an option. "And besides Hux, I'm sure you know by now that my style's rogue. I like to hunt your ships whilst lining my pockets, can't do that on my mother's orders can I?"
"I don't care whose orders you're operating on, yours or otherwise, because we both know that you have targeted this ship because you know precisely how valuable it is, whether it's Resistance's intelligence or your own. You know you are not running away this time."
"There is nothing onboard this ship that could be more valuable than I am alive," I state confidently. "And you won't be the one to issue the command, not when you know what Kylo Ren would do to you if you did. Men like you are willing to die for the cause, but are you willing to endure what people like us can do to people like you?" Poe's head turns slowly towards me and my voice shakes. "I demand to speak to him."
"You are in no position to demand anything-"
"Where is he!" My voice comes out as something unhinged, desperate, and I can almost feel Hux smiling at the plea in it. 
"Our spy told you he was here didn't he? He doesn't stay in one place for too long, not when he's trying to hunt down Skywalker to finish what he failed to do that night. Although Skywalker isn't his first priority, you are."
Somehow all I can do is draw a shaky breath as a chill washes over me.
"It truly is a shame he isn't on board," Hux continues and I search through the force, but there's nothing, and cold tears come to my eyes. "He's been waiting for a long time to reunite with his apprentice."
I feel Poe's eyes on me but I don't dare bring myself to look at him, and when I speak the cockiness has disappeared from my voice.
"I can't imagine he'd be too pleased if you blew me up before then, or Snoke for that matter," I say, my strength slowly returning to me as I remember just what I am and the value I hold. "The heir of Vader's worth more to your leader than whatever's on this ship."
"Are you?" he questions. "Because Snoke already has one of you on a leash, he doesn't need two." 
I can only pray those words go over Poe's head as I spit back "Don't be so sure about that."
"And what makes you so sure Ren wouldn't issue the command to kill you himself?" Hux continues and something wrenches in my chest. "He left you for dead after betraying Skywalker."
"No, he didn't," I hiss before I'm able to get a hold of myself and know Ben would be cursing me out for acting weak. 
But he didn't leave me to die.
He was the one who saved me that night.
He was the one who pulled me out.
He was the one who- I find myself blinking now as flashes come back to me of Voe, of Tai, of Hennix. Standing there hurling blame as Ben put himself in front of me with Luke nowhere to be found. I can taste the blood and ash in my mouth even now.
"Then why did he run to Snoke?" Hux mocks, and I look at the diagnostics that tell me my stalling for all the hell it's brought me has just about worked. 
"He'll kill you," I warn, feeling Poe's alarm blaringly loud. "He tried to kill Luke for far less, so what makes you think he'll spare you?"
"Kylo Ren is a mad dog on a leash, he doesn't bite unless he's ordered to," Hux says while my eyes continue to burn. "We both know he's no Vader, and neither are you, so you serve no value to me alive." It's then I anticipate it and activate the thrusters the moment before those ties get the order. "Fire."
Poe's the one who grabs the controls to take charge of the ship while I divert all power to the engines, shooting forward hard enough my hand slams against the console to steady myself.
"We have forty seconds until we can make the jump," I swallow, activating the automatic cannons as he dodges the assault of laser cannon fire from the ties expertly, banking hard to the point I have to grab the back of his chair to remain standing, but somehow I can't quite bring myself to appreciate his piloting skills at present when I'm looking back at two star destroyers.
But I feel it, the hesitation coming from that general. He wouldn't dare kill me without direct orders, no, if he wanted us dead we'd be dodging direct hits from two capital ships instead of tie-fighters. 
"They want to capture us not kill us."
"The two dozen ties say otherwise!" he argues and I point towards the gas giants.
"To capture us they need to get us in range of their tractor beam, they've sent the ties to try to trap us. If they were going to kill us they'd be trying harder, trust me I'd know. Just head straight for those gas giants, the yachts small enough to slip between their magnetic fields without being crushed but the destroyer won't be able to get through."
With no other plan he does as I tell him and makes a sharp turn as I begin preparing to make the jump once the hyperdrive's charged. "How much longer?"
"Twenty," I answer, the destroyers closing in fast. "But we'll make it."
He nods, not wanting to doubt that, and puts all attention into outmanoeuvring the ties that try to block us from getting through the two gas giants but even this is getting too close to my liking with the speed at which the destroyers are gaining, along with their tractor beams.
And Ben isn't on either to stop it.
But as I look back at those damn ships I wonder if he would even stop it, or if he'd be the one ordering the capture.
"How close are they?" he asks and I choose to lie for the sake of morale.
"Far, far away- just keep going and don't look back."
"So we're fucked? Gotcha," he says, as he swerves again without warning and I have to grab his arm to keep from hitting the ground before finally forcing myself into the co-pilots seat and his voice is thick with sarcasm. "Look at that, a smart idea."
"I'm not used to being the one not flying and I stalled didn't I!"
"Yeah well I don't know about your theory that they aren't trying to kill us!" he yells just before a blast from one of the destroyers explodes in front of us and suddenly I'm doubting my theory as well. "Because sorry princess but I don't think Hux likes you."
"Yeah well if he kills me he's getting brutally tortured and murdered!" I grit out with full confidence in that theory. 
"Won't matter if we're dead!" he yells but that's when diagnostics notifies us that the hyperdrive is finally charged and without hesitation I pull the lever to make the jump and we're hurtled into hyperspace.
Suddenly it's completely quiet in the cockpit without the birage of lasercannon fire and I hear my own breath, sharp and unsteady alongside his own. Once I process the fact we actually made it I fall back against the chair and realise my hands are shaking, but not from almost dying.
I inhale only to feel ash in my lungs and finally Poe's voice breaks through the silence, far gentler than it was a moment ago and heavy with concern. "Hope?"
All I can do is swallow hard as I force myself to my feet, gripping the back of the chair for dear life as I find my footing. "We made it, let's hope whatever's onboard's worth it."
I go to leave the cockpit until I feel his hand covering mine before I can let go of the chair, the pity in his eyes drives home just how much he'd heard. "We completed the mission, that's all that matters."
I give a stiff nod and slip my hand free from beneath his to make my way out towards the hyperdrive, so I have some excuse to be alone right now even though he doesn't ask for one. 
"Fuck," I breathe as I bury my face in my hands, having slid down to the floor before even taking in where I've ended up. The only sounds I can hear are the ones echoing in my head. Screams and tears and accusations I can't put memories to. 
My fingertips slip over my arm, as if I could feel the scar tissue beneath the ventilation garment. I remember that scar, remember the scream that was torn from me as Ben's saber made contact when I tried to get past him to Luke's collapsed hut. 
Then the lightning hit.
I don't know how long I'm on the floor for, only snapped out of it when Poe enters and gently brings me to my feet without questions, without accusations, he just helps me up and tells me "We've landed."
I avoid looking at his face now that he knows what he does and by the time we reach the exit I've managed to compose myself, weakly removing his hold on me before we step out and when my eyes find Mom waiting I force I smile.
"What did I tell you?" I ask, raising my arms as I motion back towards the ship. "Never tell me the odds."
"We got your yacht," Poe says, deciding to go along with it since clearly neither of us like giving her a reason to worry, and notice him also trying to ease my own worry with the look of reassurance he gives me. 
"Flyboys are all the same," Mom says shaking her head.
"Hey, some of us are flygirls too," Poe points out, and my smile is slightly more genuine. 
"Oh I know," Mom assures us. "It's a rare pilot who engages two star destroyers and lives to tell the tale."
"Word travels fast," Poe remarks.
"Yes, it does," she says, although becomes slightly alarmed when she sees the damage to the ship and asks "What happened?"
"The First Order happened," he answers, both of us knowing there's no hiding that fact and I brace myself for the interrogation. "But we made it out, barely."
"I had the situation perfectly under control," I insist and his eyebrows shoot up. "And considering we're alive you can't argue with that."
He tsks as he tries to correct. "Actually, we're alive because of my piloting-"
"No, no, we're alive because of my plan," I correct back and he laughs, but it's not mocking.
"You did not have a plan."
"Yes I did, it's called improvisation," I say and he's grinning now as he shakes his head. "And it worked."
Mom looks between us in amusement but her face changes when her eyes land on me, studying my face for only a moment before reluctantly asking "Hope, what did you do?"
"I stalled for time until we were able to make the jump to hyperspace," I say as the droids come over and I make my attempt at an exit. "R2-"
I go to dash over to him but she raises a hand to keep me from my droid. "You stalled?"
I sigh and look back at her, deciding to defend my decision instead of asking for forgiveness for compromising our deniability. "They sent two star destroyers and dozens of ties, I contacted their command and exchanged insults with General Hux until the engines were back online and we made it out."
Her face is difficult to read and she turns to Poe who to my surprise backs me up, sacrificing pride to admit it was my plan that got us out. Although admittedly his piloting did help. "We would have been killed if she hadn't. She took the fall for it, made it seem like a rogue operation instead of Resistance. I don't know if he believed it but he doesn't seem to have anything to prove otherwise."
"And besides, they can't have their agents in the senate expose me without exposing themselves," I add on and motion towards the ship. "I'm sure there's some blackmail in there to keep them quiet."
I don't know what to expect as she looks between us and the ship until she puts a hand on my shoulder. "I taught you well it seems, and I am beyond relieved you both made it out in one piece."
But it's when she brings me into her arms she feels how my body still shakes and pulls back in concern, keeping her eyes on me as she says "Commander Dameron, you've done good work today. Rest and then get started on the after action reports. We'll debrief in the morning."
"Yes General," he says and I catch his concerned glance towards me before he and BB-8 leave the hangar. "See buddy, told you we'd make it back."
Mom's voice is quiet once he's gone and no one else is in earshot. "What happened?"
"I- I thought I'd found him Mom, I thought I was safe," I manage to get out. "The Finalizer- he should have been on board."
She blinks in confusion. "Why would you have thought he'd be onboard?"
It's then I realise my screw up. 
"Hope," she says slowly. "What don't I know?"
My voice is weak. "Please don't be mad."
Her eyes widen but she gives a single nod and promises me "As long as you tell me the truth I won't be angry."
It's the greatest lie told by any parent but I go along with it.
"When we went to Batuu to get the ships a First Order spy tried to kill me," I spit out before I can decide to lie. "I grabbed him and started asking questions, Poe took over when I got carried away but he killed himself before we could stop him."
From the look in her eye it's blindingly clear Poe definitely mentioned nothing and she purses her mouth as she looks around and keeps her voice quiet. "What do you mean by carried away?"
"I shot him after he tried to shoot me," I say and she nods along, knowing I didn't break the laws of engagement if he shot first. "Then I got out my lightsaber and stuck my blaster in his wound when he wouldn't talk."
"Hope-"
"He tried to kill me to get a promotion, he was perfectly aware of what he was doing and showed no remorse for it," I insist, even she knows that I'm aware of the difference between those who work for the First Order willingly as opposed to those who were indoctrinated into it. "But what matters is that he told me that Kylo Ren is stationed onboard the Finalizer. Hux confirmed that he's usually onboard and that he'd be disappointed he missed a reunion with his apprentice."
Her concerns shift and she grows paler. "Poe heard this?"
I nod and advise her "Have the onboard recordings from the mission wiped before intelligence get's hold of them. Hux knows who Ben is and what happened that night, or at least parts of it." Mom's face is grave as she keeps a hold on my shoulder. "Poe knows I was Kylo Ren's apprentice, Hux didn't he didn't say who Kylo Ren was word for word but he said enough about already having one of the heirs of Vader and not needing another. The Commander doesn't have a great record of piecing things together but it would have been hard to miss that."
She nods in understanding and promises me "I'll take care of it, meanwhile take care of yourself and rest. We'll be transferring back to D'Qar in the morning."
She gives me one last concerned look over before leaving me in R2's hands and boarding the ship herself before anyone else can and I bend down to R2's height, resting my head on his dome to ground myself.
I don't know who in high command knows what, Admiral Ackbar is the only person I could imagine she'd trust enough to divulge the truth about what her son has become if he hadn't put it together first. I'd suspect others have their suspicions but wouldn't dare be brave enough to confront her when the official story is that he died in the fire. 
After seeing what her paternity had cost her it was a sensible decision to have the galaxy believe Ben was dead. She could be forgiven for sharing blood with an evil man she had only met in imprisonment, but for a man she birthed and raised to become the same evil that Vader was after the accusations the senate had thrown at us... it would be the final nail in the coffin for all of us.
Even the Resistance itself would be fractured, none would doubt her loyalty to the cause but they would doubt if her duty as a general outweighed hers as a mother, they would doubt her competence and capabilities. Hell the senate accused her of being a spy for Vader, there's no theory to outlandish to be believed. After all, if she couldn't keep her own son from falling to the darkness then how could she possibly keep the galaxy from falling to it? It would be the Vader scandal all over again, but there wouldn't be any returning from it this time.
And me... I'd be damned to hell right beside my brother. At sixteen years old I was damned for being the granddaughter of a man I'd never known, being the apprentice of the new Vader is something I'd never be able to escape from.
Which is why my hands shake as I look towards the exit of the hanger that Poe left through. 
Mom returns and I feel her hand on my shoulder as she reassures me "I'll deal with Poe and find out what he's put together. I trust him and his commitment to the cause, but also his personal loyalty to myself. If he has his suspicions he wouldn't breathe a word of it to anyone."
I swallow hard and ask her "How much longer can we play this game Mom? People aren't blind." My voice wavers as I remember Boba Fett's words to me. "A temple is destroyed and a Skywalker dies just as a new Vader rises. History repeats and there's only so much longer we can control this before it blows up in our faces just like before."
"Your brother is yet to become a new Vader," she promises me. "Which means he isn't lost, not yet. We control this by keeping it quiet until we can find Luke and bring Ben back before greater harm is done."
"Those things aren't exclusive," I warn her, remembering what happened before the lightning struck and knowing Luke sure as hell can't bring him back. "The Resistance needs Ben more than Luke."
"You," she corrects gently. "You need him more than Luke, but what the Resistance needs is Luke Skywalker." I open my mouth but she shuts me down "But, we do need to bring Ben back before he does become what Vader did. He's the First Order's enforcer, but he's yet to commit the atrocities Vader did. As long as his identity is not known to the greater galaxy, he still has a way to come home."
"Hux said he's a mad dog on a leash," I say and her face hardens. "I told Hux what Ben would do to him if he killed me and he simply said that he wouldn't bite without being ordered to. He's a slave to Snoke Mom, I fucking warned him-"
She hushes me now, holding me by both arms as tears fill my eyes. "I know you did sweetheart, I know how hard you tried to bring him back from the brink after he discovered the truth. Luke told me what happened in the temple on Coruscant."
I still feel Ben's grip on my arm as he dragged me out the door of Dad's apartment on Theron having decided the only place we could find the truth of Anakin Skywalker would be on Coruscant. 
Except I was the only one who saw the slaughter with my own eyes. 
"I showed Ben the holorecording of Anakin kneeling before Palpatine and told him his hero became a slave," I tell Mom, the irony painful. "When he tried to justify Anakin's decision to turn against the Jedi and take Palpatine as his master I showed him the truth of it and he didn't listen. Now history's just repeated itself."
"You can't save someone from themself," she says, her voice gentle but firm. "It is a painful fact I have had to come to terms with. I have had to watch my husband, my brother, my son, and my daughter lose themselves and learn I only have so much power to bring them back."
A tear finally spills down my cheek. "I came back didn't I?"
She nods now and holds me tight while I bury my face in her shoulder to hide the other tears that threaten to spill after being without her for so long. "You have, because you made that decision yourself, just as Ben must." Her hand smoothes over the braided crown around my head, no doubt a horrible mess by now. "Just as I told you all those years ago, you have my strength and now you need to stay and fight instead of running when things don't go your way." I give a muffled sound of agreement and she promises me "I love you, and I am proud of the work you've done today. Now rest, and we'll debrief in the morning once you've composed yourself."
"I love you too Mom," I manage to get out but I don't let go yet, I can't, and she holds onto me until I can finally breathe steadily and I look up at that damn yacht and pray whatever's onboard is worth it. 
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sl-newsie · 2 years ago
Text
Chapter Thirty Six: Can’t Erase (Spot Colon x Female Newsie)
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“Spot. Spot. Spot!” I shove him as I try ta get outta bed. “Time ta carry tha banner!”
“I don’t wanna,” the King of Brooklyn mumbles into my hair.
“I know you don’t wanna, but I gotta! Now let me up-”
“You don’t have to, Beauty. I-”
I hold up my hand. “Stop right there, Sean Colon. I am not rely’n on nobody-”
“I’s just try’n to help-!”
“I don’t ask for help!”
“I neva said you’s was. I’s just be’n a gentleman, and provid’n for my wife.” Spot responds calmly.
I try to contain my emotions. “Aw, Spot. That’s real sweet, but you knows I can’t just sit around do’n noth’n. But if it really means so much, uh… I donno. Whaddya want me to do?”
Spot sighs. “Noth’n, it’s fine.”
“No, it ain’t fine. What can I do?”
“Noth’n. I just ain’t used to a goil who’s so independent- which is a good thing!” He adds quickly.
I chuckle. “I donno whedda I should be flattered or apologize. But either way, I gotta sell papes now. C’mon, get up!”
Spot don’t say anyth’n, but gets up. I quickly get dressed and grab an apple before head’n out. Spot still doesn't say anyth’n. 
“We’ll talk ‘bout this later, ok?” I call encourag’nly from tha door.
Spot just nods.
10 minutes later, and I’ve caught up with the ‘Hattan boys at the distribution center.
“Hiya, Becs!” Crutchy calls.
“How goes it, Beccy?” Blink asks.
Their positive energy makes me smile. “Hey guys. I’s do’n ok. How ‘bout all-a you’s?”
“Hmm.” Race gets up in my face and stares straight at me. “You don’t seem ok. What’s wrong?”
I raise my eyebrows. “If you’s must know, Spot thinks I’s too independent. But maybe he’s right- maybe I should back off a little-”
“No.” Jack interrupts. He strides over from where he’s been lean’n and puts his hands on my shouldas. “Becca, you’s my sista. You’s one of the most strong, independent newsies I know, and that ain’t someth’n to be ashamed of.”
“But Jack, Spot might have a point.” Mush speaks up.
Jack turns a cold stare at him. “What’re you’s say’n, Mush?”
“I’s just say’n that it’s completely normal for a goil to be less… working?” Mush adds lightly.
“What?! Are you’s say’n she outta just sit back and let Spot do everyth’n?!”
“Uh, guys? It’s really-” I try to smooth things out, but Jack won’t listen.
“I won’t have my sista rely’n on any guy to do everyth’n for her! He’ll just abandon her-!”
“Becca can’t do everyth’n herself! She’ll work herself to death-!”
“Guys. Guys! Uh- forget this!” I hastily grab my papes and stomp away.
“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Becca,” Crutchy says. “You do what you feel is right.”
“Yeah… Just wish I knew what that was.” 
At my usual sell’n spot, the traffic is tight. It’s still cold outside, but carts and carriages crowd everywhere, and people flood the streets.
“Extra! Extra! Mayor caught in sex scandal! Corpse found in Central Park! H-”
“Kelly!”
I stop and turn around. It’s Benny, and he don’t look happy. He’s also joined by his gang- which has grown to 30 members.
Benny storms up to me, and knocks the papes outta my hands.
“Hey-!”
“You’s real dead now, Kelly!”
I sneer. “It’s Colon now, actually.”
Benny slaps me. “I could care less whedda or not you’s tied the knot- your DEAD!”
One of his goons spits at me. “You’s messed with us long enough!”
I gape. “I’s neva messed with ya- you’s tha ones always pick’n a fight with me! Ya even tried to kill me!”
“And since that didn’t work, we’s here to end this once and for all! We’s gonna beat you so hard your brains is gonna stain tha pavement!”
Uh-oh. This again.
“Well, that seems- wait! What’s that?!” I point, and when tha goons look away I dash down the street. I’s too far away to flag down the ‘Hattan newsies…
“Get the oddas! I want that bitch dead!”
Oddas?!
I just keep runn’n, hope’n to make it to Brooklyn and get reinforcements. I can see the bridge-
“Stop her!”
Oh.
Ten more goons block the street. I turn around-
And the rest of Benny’s gang is wait’n for me.
“You’s done be’n the thorn in my side, Colon.” Ben steps up and punches me in the gut- all the air is knocked outta me! “And maybe when we’s done we’s gonna pay a visit to yer brodda too!”
“No… no!’ I wheeze. “Not Jack!”
“Quiet, slut!” A goon knocks me down and kicks my legs- a bruise is already form’n.
“And then we’s gonna visit yer precious husband!” Benny continues, slapp’n my face. “While we’s at it, we’ll give those Brooklyn kids a few lessons too!”
Binx? Tommy? Mink? All those innocent kids?!
“NO!” I scream at the top of my lungs and, using what energy that’s left, kick Benny in the crotch.
“Ugh! THAT’S IT! YOU’S DEAD MEAT!” Benny picks me up like a ragdoll and flings my body against the bridge’s wall. I hear a crack, and pain floods through me.
Death at this point feels all too familiar, that I’m afraid I won’t recognize it when it comes along for good.
“With you gone, the alliance between Brooklyn and ‘Hattan’ll be over, and we’ll be able to control all the newsies in New York. So just DIE ALREADY!” He kicks me into the wall again- this time I’s in so much pain my body goes numb.
I cough, and taste blood. My vision’s go’n blurry, my lungs are on fire…
“Never fear-” A voice calls.
I weakly look up. Spot?
“-Brooklyn is here!”
I shakily smile. He came for me.
“Let her go, Benny! Or else you’s all gonna get a soak’n you’ll neva forget!” Spot dominates clearly. He marches straight up to Benny and gets in his face.
Meanwhile, Bucky comes ova to me and tries to get me to sit up- cause’n my lungs to reject me.
“Ah!” I wince.
“You’s ok? What hurts?” Bucky asks worriedly.
“Everyth’n,” I groan.
“She ain’t leave’n unless it’s in a coffin!” Benny growls.
At this, Spot grips the jerk’s shirt and pulls his face towards his own. 
“Touch her again, and I’ll kill you myself.”
“That so, Colon? Is this how ya treat old employees?”
Old employees?
“You’s know exactly why I did what I did, and I don’t regret noth’n. Leave. Her. ALONE!” Spot shoves Benny away.
Benny stumbles back, then hisses: “Get ‘em!”
The brutes charge, but the Brooklyn gang charges right back. I try to inch outta the way, but Benny comes over again and kicks me inta the wall. Through my blurred vision, I see fists be’n thrown, people be’n knocked left and right, blood and sweat fly’n.
“For Becca!” I hear ova tha noise.
Jack?
It is Jack, and all the Manhattan newsies! And-
I gasp.
Almost every newsie in New York! From Queens to Harlem to tha Bronx, they’s showed up to fight!
But Benny sees this as a perfect outcome.
“See what’ll happen when you’s dead and gone, slut? War! It’ll spread, and we’ll dominate the entire newsies network.”
No… he can’t… I won’t just let him win…!
“No,” I groan. I grip the railing and desperately ignore the scream’n pain in my ribs. Benny just laughs at me.
“Look atchya now- the tough, fearless newsie’s really just a wimpy goil!”
I grit my teeth through the pain, and use new-found strength to grip Benny’s shirt and push him towards the edge. He don’t seem to notice how close he is to the edge- someth’n to my advantage. 
“You’s couldn’t earn up to noth’n more than a housewife, ya harlot! And soon we’ll have plenty-a new members after we visit them Brooklyn kids-”
“NO!” I scream and run at him. But I’m too weak, and Benny thrusts me towards the edge- and I’s look’n at the frozen wadda beneath. An instant death.
“Au revoir, sweetheart!” Benny seethes in my ear- and I feel someth’n cold and sharp pressed by my leg. It’s a knife- Benny’s knife! An opportunity…
“B-Ben,” I struggle to make out my maybe-final words as I carefully grip the weapon. “Go. To Hell!”
With this, I jab the knife into Benny’s side- the same place he stabbed me, but deeper. One that’ll leave more than just a nasty scar.
Benny himself reacts in a frozen-shocked state. He just looks up and down from me to the wound, and stumbles back. He now sees the edge, but looks at me with a murderous glare.
“I’ll take you with me-!” He grabs my jacket and pulls me with him-!
“NO!” Spot screams and shoves Benny. They go back a forth, until Benny uses his weight to shove Spot away and try to come at me again.
But I’ve had enough. I’ve had enough of this bastard bully’n me and all the odda newsies!
Benny comes at me- so I use momentum to swing him over the edge.
Off the edge.
It all happens in slow motion- all I see is Benny’s shocked, disbelief expression frozen on his face, fall’n to a stiff, splattering death.
I look away- I can’t stand to see him hit the ice-!
Smack!
The sounds rings out for what seems like forever, and every newsie hears it.
Spot runs over, and approaches with caution when he sees my shake’n face.
“Beauty…” He holds up his hands. “It’s ok- calm down…”
I- I’m a murderer… I killed someone…
“I’m a murderer…” I stutter, and I make the mistake of look’n down- to Benny’s splattered remains scattered on the ice, mix’n pure white snow and scarlet-red blood.
Spot now wraps his arms around me and walks me away. “You ain’t a murderer.”
“I killed someone…”
“Outta self-defense. And I’m sure every newsie here would’ve done the same.”
By now all the odda newsies are gathered around.
“You’s a legend now!”
“You’s the one who offed Slick Benny!”
My face changes from shock… to horror.
“I don’t wanna be a legend for kill’n somebody!” I scream.
“You’re not. You’re not,” Spot soothes me and rubs my back. “C’mon- let’s get you’s away from here.” He turn back and addresses the crowd: “Show’s over. Thanks for come’n, but you’s gotta scram!”
“Hey! That’s my sista! I won’t just let you-!” Jack argues.
“JACK!” I yell, make’n him jump. “Please- just let me be alone right now.”
Jack’s face still looks angry, but he obliges. The ‘Hattan newsies usher him away, with him still look’n over his shoulda.
I just wanna be alone.
“C’mon- let’s get you inside,” Spot walks me away from the wall and across the bridge. 
I try to respond, but my vision goes blurry and I stumble a bit.
“Here- I’ll carry you in.”
By now we’s inside the lodge’n house. Through my spotted in-and-out vision I see Spot lay me down on the table.
“Spot- I want to be left alone. Please.”
He shakes his head. “I’m afraid I won’t allow that, Beauty. I knows you too well- you’ll beat yourself up ova this and bring harm to yourself. Am I right?” He pulls me in closer, stare’n straight into me.
I sigh, defeated. “Sean, I killed him. While you might’ve killed somebody before, I haven't! His face… the way he looked at me before he fell…” I shudda. “I donno if I’ll ever be able to go back there again.”
“Rebecca. Ya can’t blame yourself. Benny knew he had it come’n, and if you didn’t push him off he would’ve killed you. Now I donno ‘bout you, but I prefer to have Rebecca Carlyle live’n and not Slick Benny. You’s here, alive and well-” He tightens his grip on me, cause’n me to cry out in pain.
Spot’s face immediately changes. “What? What’s wrong? Are you really that hurt? What is it?”
“My… sides,” I groan.
“Lemme see.”
I sit down at the kitchen table and begin to take off my shirt when Bucky jogs in.
“Hey, boss I-” His face goes red when he sees me. “Oh! Mrs. Colon, I- I’ll just wait outside then.”
“No problem, Bucky.” I try to assure him, but I still grunt in pain.
Spot’s brows furrow. “Beauty, lemme see yer ribs.”
I have Spot unlace my corset (my shirt still cover’n part-a my chest), and immediately both Spot and Bucky’s faces change.
“Becca, that don’t look too good…”
My vision starts to black out again…
Spot’s POV
It’s all I can do not to break down myself. How can I sleep at night when Becca’ll always be in danger… But maybe now that Benny’s gone for good she’ll finally be safe?
“Just sit tight and I’ll find someone to get a second opinion-”
“No! I don’t want no stranger look’n me up and down!” Becca stands up in defiance, but it must hurt ‘cause she cries out in pain.
I frown. “Beauty, you’s hurt real bad! I gotta do someth’n-!”
“David,” Becca groans. “Get David! He’ll know what to do.”
I ain’t too convinced, but sigh in defeat and nod at Bucky, who quickly speeds off to fetch Davey. I turn back to Becca. “Davey might be smarter, but he don’t know every’n.”
Becca nods. “I know. But I trust him. And if he thinks I needs a real doctor, well…” She trails off. “We’ll see what happens.”
A doctor costs money, which is someth’n we’s don’t got much of.
Becca blacks out again, and I let her rest, on account of not want’n her to see that I’s just as scared.
In no less than ten minutes, David is hunched over pant’n and Bucky’s look’n even more concerned.
“You ok, Boss?”
I nod shakily. “Yeah, I…”
“That’s a ‘no.’”
“What if she needs a doctor?” I outburst. “I can’t afford that!”
“You won’t have to-” David says.
“Well I ain’t make’n her pay for one!” I gesture to my poor wife, who’s slowly come’n around.
“She won’t. Jack and the ‘Hattan boys went around and gathered donations from other New York newsies, even some from Jersey- she’ll be fine.”
I shake my head. “I can’t do that, David. And I’m pretty sure Becca won’t agree either. We don’t accept no charity.”
David nods. “Jack thought you’d say that, so he already ordered for a doctor to come by. You can’t say no to it.”
I- I can’t believe it.
I go over and offer my hand, and we both do the spit-shake.
“Thank you,” I say sincerely.
“No problem, Spot.”
“Wha…?” Becca groans from the table.
I attempt to look strong. “Wake up, Beauty. Davey’s here.”
Rebecca’s POV
I sit up, try’n to ignore the pain. David’s here now, so I gotta be strong.
“Let me see,” David asks. Humble, but concerned.
I lift my shirt up once more, and when David overcomes his embarrassment he looks up with a serious expression and says: “I’m sorry, Becca, but I think your ribs are broken.”
W-What?
“What does that mean?” I ask uncertainly.
“Well, it means you fractured-”
“I don’t care ‘bout the medicine talk- what’s it mean for me? Y’know- sell’n papes and such?”
David frowns. “Becca, you aren’t going to be able to sell papes for a while. You’ll need a doctor. Your ribs need to heal, and for the next few weeks you’ll need to stay in bed and only get up when you need to.”
I swallow, and hold back frustrated tears. 
“So… you’s say’n I’s useless?”
“No! No, I- well, you won’t be able to do much- but that isn’t your fault!” David catches himself. “I didn’t mean-!”
“No, David,” I whisper. “You’re right. It is my fault. If I’dve just fought harder, or…”
“Or WHAT?” Spot shakes my shouldas, unaware of the pain it’s cause’n me. “Rebecca- stop blame’n yourself! Please! You ain’t perfect, so stop try’n to please everybody!”
“I can’t help it! I always remember I was never good good enough for my own fadda, and it just-! And- And I’s can’t afford a doctor-!”
I break down cry’n. Let’n the tears flow down my face, and feel’n ashamed of make’n a fool of myself. I can’t sell papes, I can’t be of service to anybody, I can’t do noth’n- I really am useless. But my outburst is make’n me pant for air- and I suddenly realize that my lungs are on fire. My vision’s go’n blurry… It hurts to breathe, and all I can do is take short, shallow breaths.
By now Spot’s guesses someth’n’s wrong.
“Beauty? Rebecca?! What’s wrong?”
“I-” Breath. “I-” Breath. “C-Can’t-” Breath. “Can’t-” Breath. “B-Br-” Breath. “Can’t breath!” I gasp.
Spot immediately reacts by pull’n me into his lap and hold’n my face.
“David! What’s going on?! What do I do?!”
David shakes his head. “I donno! She might be having trouble breathing ‘cause of her ribs. She- she could be having a panic attack?”
“So how do you stop a panic attack?” Bucky asks.
Yeah, let’s all just discuss this while I pass out!
“I once read that you can stop a panic attack by holding your breath,” David suggests.
“Ok- how’re we’s supposed to make her hold her breath?” Bucky asks.
“I know!” Spot says.
He cups my face in his hands and smashes his lips into mine. Electricity runs through me, and I forget all about breath’n- and just feel him. His lips feel like fire, and I let him explore mine. Spot deepens tha kiss by lean’n into me, and in the end we’s both star’n at each odda with our foreheads touch’n.
Meanwhile, Bucky and David are stare’n with their mouths hang’n open.
“Well… that worked,” David states awkwardly.
“How’d you know that would work?” Bucky asks.
Spot chuckles. “When ya kiss somebody you hold yer breath, so I just went with it.”
“And I thank you for that,” I breathe steadily. I try to sit up, but Spot stops me.
“Lay down, Beauty. You’s gonna hurt yourself.”
“Yeah. I’ll go get the doctor-” David dashes outta the room.
“David no-!” I protest. “David! I’s can’t afford no doctor!”
“Who said you’s was pay’n for a doctor?” Spot asks cockily. 
I gape at him. “No. No, no no! Spot, I ain’t make’n you pay for a doctor!”
“You ain’t. Yer brodda Jackie boy and his friends raised the money.”
“And you’s let ‘em? I ain’t no charity case-!”
“No, but you’s was the one targeted by Benny the most. I guess everybody felt sorry ‘bout it-”
“Spot. Do ya know what that makes me sound like? A weak, fragile goil! I ain’t like that, Spot! You tell Jack I ain’t accept’n no money!”
“It don’t madda- Jack’s already sent for a doctor,” Bucky speaks up.
At this, a knock comes from the door. Bucky opens it, and David’s back with a man in a fancy suit.
“I was told that there was an injury I needed to inspect?”
“Yeah- right here.” David points at me, and Spot grips my hand to reassure me he’s here to protect me.
“Does she have a… proper guardian?” The doc asks suspiciously.
“That’d be me, her husband,” Spot states clearly.
The doc looks unconvinced. “Very well then, Mr…?
“Colon.”
“Mr. Colon. What seems to be the problem?”
“We think her ribs might be broken,” Bucky says.
“Let’s see…” The doctor sets a medical bag down next to me. “Please lift up your shirt, Mrs. Colon.”
I hesitate, but Spot gives a reassure’n look, so I do as the doc says.
Then he does someth’n I don’t expect- he pokes my ribs. Which causes so much pain I give an ear-splitt’n scream.
Spot immediately shoves the guy away and gets in his face.
“What the Hell’re you do’n? What was that for?!”
“I’m just checking to see how deep the damage is,” the doc says calmly. “And I'm happy to say that it’s only broken ribs, and no punctured organs. She will need to have plenty of bedrest, and stay off her feet for at least a week. The best I can do is say give it time to heal.”
“Guess you know best, doc.” Bucky tries to get Spot to back off, but Spot’s still uneasy.
“It’s ok, Spot. I’m fine.” I give a weak smile.
“How did this happen?” the doc asks.
“I… got in a fight.” I say, ashamed.
He frowns. “And your… husband didn’t help you?”
“Hey-!” Spot gets up again but Bucky pushes him down. 
“Spot, it’s ok. It’s ok.” I try to calm him down.
“Like I said before, she should get plenty of bedrest. Drink plenty of fluids.” He goes over to his bag and begins to pack up, all the while give’n the room an uneasy look as if he’s ‘bout to get mugged. “If there are any more symptoms, let me know.”
He very quickly strides out the door, and as soon as he does Bucky gets a hint that Spot wants to be left alone with me.
“I’ll be outside, boss.”
Spot nods, still stare’n at the wall. “Thanks, Buck.”
As soon as he leaves, Spot kicks a chair.
“Spot, he was only do’n his job-”
“Yeah, and he was say’n I was a bad husband! Not to mention put’n you in more pain!”
Ignore’n the pain, I grab his shirt and pull him over to face me.
“Spot, you are a wonderful husband. That guy’s just not used to deal’n with… our kind. He’s used to more rich folks. You’s the best husband I could eva ask for, no question ‘bout it.”
“I guess,” Spot grumbles.
I bury my face in his chest. “I’s know so. And, you’s was just say’n how you wanted me to be less independent-” I turn my head up and stare into his blue eyes. “Now you got your wish.”
Spot’s mouth falls open. “Rebecca, that is not what I meant at all. I neva wanted you to get hurt-”
“Sh, sh.” I place my fingas over his lips. “I know what you means. But I won’t be have’n folks do’n everyth’n for me.”
Spot closes his eyes and sighs. “You’s one unique individual, Beauty. Never ever change.” He lifts me up off the table. “Let’s get you upstairs.”
He gently wraps his arms around me and slowly carries me up the stairs. When he lays me down on the bed he acts as if I’m a doll who’s ‘bout to break.
“I’ll go get some ice for your ribs.”
“Thanks, Sean.” I give his nose a quick kiss.
Spot, in turn, leans in to kiss my neck. “Don’t mention it.”
In less than a minute he comes back. When I lift up my shirt he cautiously looks at me.
“You ok with this? Me ice’n your side?”
I stifle a laugh, and cringe at the pain it makes.
“Spot, this ain’t the most intimate thing we’s done. Please, just numb my ribs before they fall off!”
Spot grins and begins carefully ice’n my sides, relief flood’n through my skin. “Just check’n. Y’know, I can do lots-a things to make ya numb.”
God, the things this man could do to me.
“Can I heal foist?”
Spot’s grin widens. “That ain’t a ‘no.’”
I smirk back. “Neva said it was.”
“You’s one hell of a goil, Beauty. I guess we’s both gonna be wait’n for you to heal.”
At this, Spot lets me hold the ice packs while he lies down next to me and presses himself closer.
“Let me know if you’s need anyth’n,” Spot mumbles as he begins to drift off.
“Thanks Spot. I luv you.”
“Luv you too.”
Throughout the night, I try not to squirm or more too much. Whenever I breathe too deeply, my entire body aches. But every time I groan Spot immediately wakes up, as if it’s a sixth sense whenever I’s in pain. I can’t say I ain’t flattered, and I luv him for it.
I wake up the next morn’n with Spot’s arms wrapped tightly around me. After a while, I try to wake him up.
“Wake up, Spot. Time to carry the banner.”
“I ain’t sell’n papes today,” he mumbles into my hair.
“Why?” I ask openly. 
“‘Cause I’s stay’n here to make sure you’s ok.”
I can’t help smil’n. “Aw, Spot. That’s real sweet of ya, but you’s still need to sell. What ‘bout money-?”
“You comes foist, money comes later.”
I groan. “That might be fine in your book, but I say you’s can’t just stay here all day watch’n me.”
“I’s take’n care of my wife, like a proper husband. If that’s ok?” Spot asks cockily.
I respond by pulling his suspenders and smashing my lips to his. Spot cups my face in his hands and deepens the kiss. Afta a while we break away.
“Spot Colon, you’s the greatest poison I know,” I say as I lay onto his chest.
“And you’s the best wife a guy could ever have,” Spot kisses the top of my head.
Throughout the day Spot helps by gett’n me fresh water, more ice for my ribs, and keep’n my mind off the pain by talk’n to me. At ‘bout 3 o’clock my thoughts are answered: Race and Mush lead the ‘Hattan newsies into the room- even Crutchy made it!
“Hiya fellas,” I say enthusiastically.
“Hey Becs!”
“How ya do’n?”
“Your ribs still hurt?”
“David told us what happened!”
I groan. “Yeah, apparently I’s gonna be bedridden for a week or two.”
“And you’s gonna do that, right?” Mush looks at me threaten’ly.
“Yeah, yeah. I’s already heard the speech from Spot.” I look up at my husband, who grins back at me.
At this the newsies seem to realize that Spot’s sit’n on the bed with me- and I get mixed reactions. Some eyebrows raise, some eyes widen, jaws drop, some look uneasy.
Jack looks murderous, but contains any comments.
“I’s fine guys, really I’s is. It’s real sweet you’s came to visit, but you’s shouldn’t be wast’n time worry’n ‘bout me. You’s should be sell’n papes.”
“While you’s here bored outta your mind? Wouldn’t miss it!” Race jokes.
“Although looks like Spotty’s keep’n ya company,” Skittery remarks.
“Can it, Skit,” I warn, feel’n Spot tense up.
Jack walks up, and I’s can see he’s been cry’n. He pulls me into a hug and I don’t bother to remind him of my ribs. But when he squeezes a bit too hard I grunt a little and he lets go.
“Rebecca… I’m so sorry… I… We shoulda been there sooner,” Jack sighs.
I put my hand on his shoulda. “Jack, there was noth’n more you’s could do. It was only a madda of time ‘til Benny killed me or got what was com’n to him. I’s still here, alive. Don’t beat yerself up. Please.”
Jack nods stiffly, then lets Spot return to his place beside me.
“Becca’s right. We’s should still go sell, ‘cause she needs rest. Let’s move it!” He turns and looks back at Spot. “Keep an eye on her. You knows like I do how she’ll try anyth’n to get out.”
Spot chuckles. “See ya, Jackie Boy.”
They’s all leave, and Spot lays down with me. Gentle not to push my ribs too much, Spot wraps his arms around me and rests his chin on my head.
“Get some rest. I’s still wait’n for that rain check on make’n you go numb,” Spot muddas in an affectionate but seductive tone.
I smile viciously. “Sure thing, Boss.”
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