#I personally don’t mind the fact that they changed up the whole ‘convincing them that the other secretly loves them’ bit

[mariathechosen1]

Was Anyone But You a good Much Ado About Nothing adaptation? No, not at all, but fuck it was fun!

[jadeoru]

shame marathon! - iwaizumi x reader

after begrudgingly agreeing to see the minions movie with his friends, he hoped no one would see him in this state: dressed in small denim overalls, with yellow face paint sloppily smeared all over his face.

unfortunately for him, the person serving him popcorn was exactly his type.

warnings: minions. this is so stupid lmao, iwa dressed like a minion, terrible jokes, deadpool is awesome, awkwardness, cursing, terrible flirting, clu declared this silly and whimsical!!, fluff! wc: 2.8k

a/n: this is entirely self indulgent i work in a cinema and was overwhelmed by the amount of grown people dressed as minions LMAO ^__^

Iwaizumi had never felt true shame until now. His denim overalls were far too small for him, so he walked cautiously - scared that if he flexed his biceps even slightly, the buttons would pop off. He regretted every action he made that led him to this moment. Embarrassment heated his face as he watched his friends enthusiastically hide their candy stash in their pockets. They looked ridiculous: sporting the same overalls as he was. At least theirs actually fit them. Their faces were poorly painted yellow, and some of them (Bokuto and Hinata) even went as far as to wear goggles. He buried his hands in his pockets, silently hoping that even by only covering his hands, somehow, magically, the rest of him would be hidden too. With a tap on the shoulder, his shame was quickly put on hold, now focusing on his yellow best friend, Oikawa.

“Oh come on grandpa, lighten up. Would it kill you to have fun?” He nudged him with his elbow, and Iwaizumi groaned in response. “Why are we even seeing this movie? We’re grown fucking adults! This is- this is ridiculous!” He released one hand from the security of his pocket, running it through his hair, trying to wipe away the sweat that had formed. “Excuse you! Minions is a cinematic fucking masterpiece. I will not let the fact that I'm an adult get in the way of enjoying art!” Bokuto chirped in, his expressive face wonderfully displaying the excitement that surged through him. Iwaizumi’s voice decreased in volume, a clear sign of giving up. “Did we have to go out in public like this? Why couldn’t we have just, i don’t know, stayed home?” as much as he tried to persuade his socially fearless friends to just go home, to spare him the embarrassment of someone he knew seeing him in this state: dressed like a fucking minion, nothing he said would change their mind. “Because it’s funny! And imagine the look on kids’ faces when they see a whole group of minions pulling up to the movie!” It was Hinata's turn to convince him now, flexing his muscles in a half-hearted manner as he spoke, trying to ease iwaizumi’s woes. He wasn’t having any of it. “We shouldn’t be there anyways! It’s a kids movie!” he waved his hands in the air, exasperated, desperate to help his friends realise how utterly ridiculous they were.

Did they fear nothing? Was social anxiety a foreign concept to them? Kuroo slung his arm around his shoulder, a lazy grin stretched onto his face. “Dude, the minion costume isn’t gonna kill you. Plus, we’re all wearing one too so you aren’t alone. Quit complaining and have fun, loser.” He wiggled Kuroo off of him and rolled his eyes. “I agreed to do this when I was high! Now that I have a clear mind, obviously I don't want to do this! You guys totally took advantage of me!” His friends slowly inched further from the car as his complaining progressed. By the looks of it, he had about one minute to convince everyone to just go home, otherwise they’d already be inside the cinema.

Oikawa looked at him from over his shoulder, waving him over to catch up with them. “I’m sorry that your post-nut clarity is biting you in the ass right now, but quit being a wimp! You’re the big strong hunk of the group, you’re supposed to be fearless! Imagine what the ladies would think if they knew you were scared of minions!” his teasing words caused his anger to overpower his shame, quickly speed walking to catch up with everyone. “I’m not scared of the fucking minions!” he shouted at Oikawa, who’s head was turned away from him, holding in a laugh at how ridiculous his once-terrifying best friend looked. The whole group looked like a bunch of jaundiced babies. Everyone struggled to contain their laughter. Before he knew it, they were at the doors of the cinema. “Come on!” Hinata shouted, shoving everyone, including Iwaizumi, through the doors; not giving him a single second to turn around and make a run for it.

Trying to bury his shame, he let out a groan. Looking to his left, both Bokuto and Hinata were bouncing with excitement; their eyes scanned the prices of popcorn. As he thought of it, he realised their personalities were eerily similar to the minion’s. Now that they looked the part, he realised this was the closest he’d get to seeing the real thing. He smiled at that. Okay, maybe this wasn't so bad. Maybe he should just have fun. With his hands on his hips, and that small smile on his face, he inserted himself back into the conversation his friends were having.

“Ew. you look terrifying when you smile.” Oikawa laughed, immediately making his newly found confidence plummet. “Fuck you! You don’t look so hot yourself, shittykawa.” He could feel the vein on his forehead throbbing with annoyance. “Not true! I make a gorgeous minion! I’m like Bob, the cute one!” He winked, Shoyo quickly jumped in. “Nuh uh! I wanna be Bob! He’s the little one right? I meet all of the Bob criteria!” Kuroo let out a laugh, “Sorry Oikawa, Hinata is way more of a Bob than you are. You’re definitely a Stuart.” Iwaizumi could’ve sworn he saw Oikawa’s eye twitching at that comment. He slowly turned his head to face Kuroo, giving him the nastiest dirty look he’d ever seen. “Tetsurou, with all due respect, I hope you wake up in the morning and there are fucking skid marks in your bed.” Oikawa spat his words at Kuroo as if they left a bad taste in his mouth. He hit him in the chest with his finger, poking him repeatedly to add to his threat. “Clearly you haven’t done your research before you showed up today because I am literally Bob in human form!” Oikawa whined. Iwaizumi let out a cackle that quickly silenced the group. “He’s right, you are absolutely a Stuart.” he spoke through laughter. Oikawa looked at him with betrayal in his eyes. “Well if I’m Stuart, then that makes you Kevin.” Iwaizumi’s eyebrows furrowed. “What? I’m not Kevin.” Bokuto chuckled, “You are absolutely Kevin!” his eyebrows furrowed, “How?” He got a smile in response. “Well, for starters you have an abnormally stretched head, you’re a know-it-all, and you take care of everyone. Face it bro, you’re Kevin the minion!” Iwaizumi gritted his teeth. “What’s wrong with my head? It’s shaped completely normally, prick!” he shouted, garnering the attention of the surrounding children. “It’s definitely Kevin shaped!” Whatever. 

He scoffed, not wanting to lose any more brain cells from this conversation than he already had. He looked at his watch. 9:21pm. 9 minutes until the movie started. “Let’s just get our tickets and get this over with.” He mumbled, catching a glimpse of himself in the reflection of his watch: his yellow face in all of its glory. Oikawa stopped him before he could begin walking, taking a step in front of him. “Not without popcorn! We can’t watch a movie without popcorn!” He yelled dramatically, more people around them started staring. Iwaizumi wanted the ground to swallow him whole. “Let’s get your stupid popcorn then.” he grumbled, placing a firm hand on his friend’s wrist, Oikawa quickly yanked it away. “Can you just get it for us? I wanna take pictures of us before the movie starts!” He smiled, pulling his phone out and fixing his hair in front of the camera. “So you’re gonna make me talk to the staff on my own? While I look like this?” he huffed, staring at him with irritance. “Trust me this is not your worst look, Iwa. Remember your bowl cut phas-” he cut him off with a nudge to the back, bumping him forward with his elbow. “Shut up! Fine, I'll go. What kind of popcorn are we getting?” He massaged his temple with his fingers in an attempt to soothe the headache that was forming. “Butter!” Hinata shouted, Kuroo nodding behind him. “Gross! Get salted!” Bokuto shouted back, sticking his tongue out; feigning disgust. Oikawa, the tie-breaker, looked at Iwaizumi with shrugged shoulders. “Just get one of each, I’ll pay you back.” Iwaizumi glanced at his watch again. 5 minutes until the trailers started. “Whatever.” he muttered under his breath, quickly turning on his heels and making his way towards the counter.

He was so focused on being fast and time-efficient he almost forgot that he was dressed up like a minion. He almost forgot how stupid he looked. And as he reached the counter, a line quickly forming behind him; leaving him with no chance to flee,

He saw you.

In front of him, stirring nacho cheese with your back facing him, he watched in silence. Maybe it was the shame of seeing your reaction to his current state, but he was nervous. He swallowed the lump in his throat, and stuffed his hands into his pockets once more, fingers fidgeting with his money.

“Uh, excuse me?” he spoke politely, but loudly, trying to catch your attention. You turned around to face him and god, he felt as if his body was set on fire. Embarrassment washed over him like a wave as you jumped slightly at the unexpected sight. “Oh! Sorry!” you smiled, amused by the man in front of you. “What can I do for you?” His fists clenched, and with white knuckles he regrettably made the realisation that you might’ve been the most gorgeous person he had ever seen. For fuck’s sake. Of all times to meet a person like you, it just had to be when he was dressed up like a fool. With yellow fucking face paint, and tiny overalls. He felt guilty for just looking at you.

“Um- could I get 2 medium popcorns?” he cleared his throat, trying to make his voice sound deeper, to make up for, well, what was happening on his face. “One salt, and one butter. Please.” He avoided eye contact. If he could be grateful for one thing in that moment, it was that the yellow paint concealed his blush. “Coming right up!” He could hear the slight chuckle in your voice, trying desperately not to laugh at a customer. “Nice outfit by the way. Let me guess, you’re seeing longlegs?” You joked, grabbing a popcorn bucket and shovelling the plain popcorn into it. Iwaizumi laughed - a lot harder than he should have. Was he laughing with nervousness? Were you just so pretty he couldn’t help himself? Were you laughing with or at him? A thick cloud of questions circled in his mind like a cyclone. But the sound of your laughter fading quickly calmed it down. “How’d you know?” he attempted to joke back. He spoke through a smile, gritted teeth trying to hide the embarrassment that danced on the tip of his tongue.

You laughed again, walking further from the counter to add butter to the popcorn. You hummed to a melody only you could hear in your mind, knees bending up and down in a subtle dance. You turned back to face him again, handing him the now buttered popcorn.

“Are they with you?” you asked, pointing at his minion friends behind him, who were dancing as Oikawa recorded them. He rolled his eyes. “Unfortunately yeah. This was their idea. You have no idea how embarrassing this is.” he spoke quieter, causing you to lean in closer to listen, grabbing another empty popcorn bucket. “I don’t think it’s embarrassing. If anything, it’s cute! This job gets boring really easily so seeing people dressed up like you just makes my day!” You weren’t looking at him while you spoke, partly because you weren’t capable of making eye contact after calling him cute, and also because you needed to focus on making sure the popcorn actually landed in the bucket.

He gulped, suddenly way too aware of his sweaty palms. Was he going to make it out of this interaction alive? He doubted it. Honestly, he didn’t care. He was just glad you were talking to him; treating him normally. As if he wasn’t currently about to sweat the yellow off of his face. Noticing the silence that formed around you, he continued the small talk. “So.. You uh, you work in a cinema right? You a big fan of movies?” He straightened his back, flexing his height. His face almost scrunched up with disgust at how pathetic he sounded. You mixed the salt into the popcorn as you spoke. “Honestly, I'm more of a fan of older stuff. Nowadays people just don’t make movies like they used to. Ah- Except for minions, of course.” You winked at him, unaware of how you almost made his heart stop. “I’ve been meaning to see the new Deadpool too, actually.” you spoke at the perfect pace for him to process and cherish each syllable that left your lips. Oh god, he really was pathetic.

Grabbing onto the second popcorn bucket you handed him, he struggled to mirror your smile. “I love deadpool!” He lied. He had never seen a single Deadpool movie in his life. Hopefully you wouldn’t quiz him on his plot knowledge. You smiled again, “It’s so funny!” He nodded in response, not trusting whatever lies would come out of his mouth. You typed something into the register, and then told him his total. He forgot about that. Trying to balance the popcorn, he reached into his pockets and pulled his money out, handing it to you with shaky hands. You thanked him and placed it neatly into the register.

Before you could utter your classic ‘Have a nice day!’ he spoke up again. “Hey uh. How about we see the new Deadpool movie together sometime? - when you’re free of course.” He clutched the popcorn buckets for support; stability. Like if you said no, he could retreat inside of them and hide away forever. Had he misread the whole situation? Did you actually hate him and feel repulsed by the sight of him? He hoped he was wrong. You totally liked him too, right? You leaned forward onto the counter, almost close enough to feel the breath that escaped his lips. “Are you asking me on a date? Am I getting asked out by a minion?” you asked, a teasing lilt in your tone. He cleared his throat, almost choking on his spit in the process. He was so embarrassed it hurt. “Do you want me to?” He choked out - His desperate expression matched his voice. You giggled, holding your chin in your palm. “Maybe I do.”

He almost dropped the popcorn after hearing those words fall from your lips. This time, his smile was natural; wide enough to make his eyes squint. “Awesome! So uh.. When are you free?” he asked, getting lost in your gaze in the most cliché way possible. Your eye contact broke as you acknowledged the long line that had accumulated behind him. Where did these people come from? With a sigh, you looked back at him. “Sorry, would you mind if we planned this later? I need to get back to my job.” You spoke sweetly, pretending to gag at the thought of working another hour. “I could give you my number?” you asked, with a hopeful glint in your eye.

He never said yes faster in his life.

Grabbing a ballpoint pen from your pocket, you wrote your phone number down on a napkin and neatly folded it up, handing it to him. He eagerly grabbed it, placing it in his pocket. He muttered a shy thank you, to which you nodded. “See you later, minion boy.” you joked, the smirk on your face was decorated with cheeks that were hot to the touch. His eyes widened as he realised, he hasn’t even told you his name. “Oh, it’s Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi Hajime.” He almost forgot his own name. You introduced yourself in return. Was it possible to fall in love with names? Because nothing had ever sounded better to him in his life.

“See ya.” he said, repeating your name. It rolled off his tongue like a fluent language. You winked, “Later, Iwa.”

You texted him later that night, when the both of you were at home. You were free tomorrow, and there was a Deadpool screening at 10am. He had to pull an all-nighter that night to:

One: watch the deadpool movies,

Two: plan how he was going to talk to you,

And three: come up with witty jokes that would make you laugh.

He hoped you would like normal him more than the minion version.

[dreamwritesimagines]

The Eye of the Hurricane [13] - Cupcakes

A.N: Here’s the new chapter my loves! ❤️ Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback, you made my day! ❤️I hope you’ll like this chapter as well and please don’t forget to tell me what you think! ❤️

Summary: There are many ways to plan a wedding.

Word Count: 2500

Pairing: MobBoss!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Violence, stabbing, death, guns, crime, blood, explicit language, dysfunctional relationship. This is an AU, friendly reminder that I don’t condone any of the actions depicted on this story and please read with care.

Series Masterlist

Apparently, the fact that you had been in a car chase with bullets flying around last night didn’t change the fact that you had to go cake tasting the next morning.

Even if you were in desperate need of some sleep.

Bucky had brought you back into the honeymoon suit last night and put around twenty bodyguards in the hallway before leaving, and even if you wanted to go with him to question the captives, you were way too tired to do so. Since he was nowhere to be found in the suit after you woke up, you figured he had gone to his apartment instead of here after he was done. You heaved a sigh as you filled your cup with coffee, then walked to sit down on the couch and pulled your phone up to check the schedule for the day. Taking a sip of your coffee, you sent a quick text to Becca, and looked over your shoulder when you heard the door open.

Bucky offered you a small smile as he stepped into the hotel suit, and you tilted your head.

“Hey,” you said. “I was wondering where you were.”

“Hey,” he rasped out, exhaustion laced in his tone and you frowned slightly.

“Why do you look like you haven’t slept last night?”  

Bucky shook his head, making his way to the coffee pot before grabbing a cup from the cabinet.

“Because I haven’t—” He stopped talking when he looked down at the red fingertip stains on the white porcelain cup he was holding, then cursed under his breath and went to wash his hands in the sink. You took a better look at him, now noticing the blood on his clothes and pulled back slightly.

“Bucky?”

“Not my blood,” he said. “I was uh—we were questioning the guys.”

“The whole night?”

“Mm hm,” he said, wiping his hands with a paper towel before grabbing another cup to pour himself some coffee. You leaned back to the kitchen island, cradling your cup in your palms.

“You should get some rest.”

“No time for that,” he said, taking a huge sip of his coffee. “I’m gonna take a quick shower and go to work. How do you feel? Could you get some sleep last night?”

“Are you trying to divert the subject?”

“Yeah, is it working?”

“No,” you deadpanned. “You need to sleep.”

“Sleep is for the weak,” he joked, making you roll your eyes at him.

“Bucky.”

“I’ll be fine,” he said. “Don’t worry about me.”

“I don’t,” you said quickly. “I don’t worry about you as a principle. It’s just that if you get sick because you haven’t slept or whatever, we’ll have to postpone the wedding and I know you haven’t met our wedding planner but she is not the type of person you cross.”

“Noted,” Bucky said. “Do you have any plans today?”

“I’m going cake tasting with Becca,” you said. “So did the guys say anything?”

“One of them will, eventually,” Bucky said. “We’re being very convincing.”

You hummed.  “Do you have a preference?”

“In weapons?”

You blinked a couple of times.

“In cakes,” you said. “Flavor wise.”

“Ah,” he said. “Sorry, my mind is still at the warehouse. Anything but banana.”

“Very helpful,” you muttered. “You don’t have a favorite flavor in cakes?”

“Not really, I’m good with all of them—” he started but his phone vibrated in his pocket and he pulled it out, then his eyes skimmed the lines before he let out a groan.

“What?” you asked and he rubbed at his eyes.

“I forgot I had a meeting with Stark,” he said and cleared his throat. “Great, okay. So doing wedding stuff today then?”

“Yeah I gotta take a shower and get ready, but I can wait. You’re the one who looks like a horror movie killer.”

He grinned. “You know, if you ever wanted to save water…”

“You’re about to pass out from exhaustion and you can still make sex jokes?” you asked with your brows raised and he shrugged his shoulders.

“I have my priorities,” he said. “So if you—”

“That will never happen,” you pointed out. “Go.”

He held up his hands.

“Okay, okay…” he said as he climbed the stairs and you shook your head slightly when you heard the bathroom door close.

“Jesus Christ,” you muttered, taking another sip of your coffee. “Can’t believe I’m marrying him.”

                                             *

When you planned this cake tasting with Becca, you were sure it would be fun for you but safe to say, Becca’s mood wasn’t the best after last night. When you first talked about it, you had said Leila could join as well but since she wasn’t here, you could only guess they had a big talk last night, after the car chase incident.

“So,” you said as you sat down and grabbed the nearest cupcake, then read the label that informed you that it was walnut and carrot. “How have you been?”

“Fine,” Becca said, turning the cupcake in her hand and you pressed your lips together.

“How is Leila after last night?”

“Uh, she went to work,” Becca said, still staring at her cupcake. “And hasn’t texted me yet so I wouldn’t know.”

“Did she say anything last night?” you asked as you bit down on the cupcake, then shook your head and put it aside while Becca heaved a sigh.

“Yeah we talked.”

“And?”

“She says—I mean obviously she was terrified but she kept saying it wasn’t my fault.”

You hummed. “But you don’t believe her.”

“Well she has been in zero car chases with bullets flying around before she met me, so…” Becca trailed off and you reached out to hold her hand.

“Becca…”

“She’s going to leave me,” Becca said and cleared her throat. “You know what, she should leave me. That’s the right choice there.”

“Becca!”

“I never thought I’d say this, but maybe mom was right.”

You rolled your eyes. “I love Winnifred, but I wouldn’t take her advice on romance.”

“No no,” Becca said. “She kept saying this life is no fit for civilians, and she’s right.”

“You’re not even officially in the business,” you told her. “I mean I can see why being with a civilian would put them in danger if you’re one of the bosses, but you’re not. You don’t even want to be.”

“It doesn’t matter though,” Becca insisted. “I put my girlfriend in danger—”

“HYDRA put your girlfriend in danger,” you said. “And everyone is fine except those guys. I don’t know where Bucky took them but—”

“The usual warehouse.”

“Ah,” you said. “Well apparently he questioned them all night last night, so I can assure you that we’re taking revenge.”

“My girlfriend’s safety is more important to me than revenge,” she said and you pulled back slightly.

“Right,” you said. “No I know. But they’re never going to hurt anyone else, I assure you. And Leila is safe.”

She pursed her lips together and shut her eyes before squeezing at your hand.

“Sorry if that came out snappy.”

“No I get it,” you said. “Trust me.”

“It’s just…” she muttered and swallowed thickly. “Is this going to be the rest of my life? Always looking over my shoulder and worrying I might get someone killed?”

“Of course not,” you said in a rush. “No way. We had truce so far and it never happened before right? It’s just until we get rid of these assholes that we need to be extra careful, that’s all. After that, it will all be fine.”

She scoffed a small laugh.

“You sound like Bucky.”

“That might be the worst thing you ever said to me throughout our friendship,” you deadpanned and she let out a giggle.

“He looked pretty worried last night.”

“I mean I’d say so, you’re his little sister—”

“No no, for you,” she said. “We had a talk when he took me and Leila home.”

You pulled your brows together and shook your head.

“No way, Bucky doesn’t worry about me,” you said. “Why would he?”

Becca blinked a couple of times, and opened her mouth then closed it again to lean her fist on her lips, as if trying to control herself.

“Because we’re picking cakes for your wedding right now?”

“Oh yeah but that’s the only reason,” you said. “If I get killed, he will have to do business with Ian and he won’t do it so… It’s in his self-interest rather than my wellbeing.”

“I can’t believe I used to accuse Bucky of being oblivious.”

“Hm?”

“Nothing,” she said. “Okay so, my relationship issues aside, let’s pick the perfect cake for you and my brother’s wedding that is completely pragmatical on both sides, nothing more.”

You nodded fervently, then turned to look at the table.

“Not the bananas though, apparently he doesn’t like banana flavor in cakes.”

Becca raised her brows and tried to bite back a smile.

“Right. Uh huh.”

“Anyways,” you said and grabbed the next cupcake. “Let’s do a pragmatical cake tasting then.”

                                                        *

By the time you were done with everything you were supposed to do, it was already evening. You and Becca had picked two cakes but you couldn’t be sure so you had asked the bakery to give you a box of them so that you could get Bucky’s opinion as well.

Even though the idea of making his slice banana flavored just to mess with him was tempting, you were going to play nice.

Well, as nice as you could.

You pulled over in front of the warehouse and left the car with your bodyguards following you. Bucky’s men rushed around as soon as they saw you walking there with the small bag thrown over your arm, and one of them opened the door to no doubt let Bucky know. You smiled at the men by the door.

“May I?”

“Of—of course ma’am,” one of them said, opening the door for you and you stepped inside to see Bucky approaching the door.

“Charm?”

“Hi there,” you said looking around the warehouse. You had been here a couple of times while you were still the heir, and it looked as huge as you remembered. You could see the tied up figured on the chair far away in the room as the familiar scent of blood hit your nostrils, and you scrunched up your face before turning to Bucky’s men. “Could you leave us please?”

They turned to look at Bucky who nodded, so they all left one by one, leaving you with him and the tied figure that almost looked unconscious. Bucky went to the table to grab a towel so that he could wipe his bloodied hands.

“What are you doing here?”

“Wedding stuff,” you said, putting the bag on the table to open the small cardboard box. “I’m supposed to let them know tonight about which flavor we picked, and I figured I wouldn’t have the time if you decide to spend the whole night here again.”

“Okay but—”

“Also what kind of a question is that? We’re getting married and I can’t visit you at work, asshole?”

“I didn’t mean—”

“Here,” you cut him off by pushing a piece of cupcake into his mouth before he could say anything else and he pulled his brows together as he chewed on it, obviously deciding that arguing with you was useless.

“This is amazing,” he said. “What is this?”

“Lemon coconut,” you said as you tore a piece of the other cupcake in the box while he nodded.

“We can go with this one—”

“No so fast buddy, try this too,” you said, pushing the piece of the other cupcake into his mouth again and he chewed on it, deep in thought.

“And this?”

“Chocolate blueberry.”

“Fuck, this is a hard decision.”

“I know right?” you asked while the guy tied to the chair let out a whine. “I’m more leaning towards lemon coconut but…”

“Yeah no, chocolate blueberry is delicious too—why don’t we have two cakes?”

“Because the cake is symbolical Bucky!” you whispered while the guy let out another groan. “This marriage is going to require us to take some decisions about business together, how are we going to do that if we can’t decide on—shut it asshole!”

Bucky looked over his shoulder at the guy. “Yeah prick, we’re having a conversation here.”

“Fuck you,” the guy managed to wheeze out and Bucky shook his head slightly.

“You’d think he’d be more cooperative since I killed the other guy in front of him.”

You hummed, picking at the cupcake. “We are killing him too right?”

“Obviously, he put you and Becca in danger.”

“He also made Becca upset!” you said. “You know how I feel when people make Becca upset.”

Bucky popped the piece of cupcake into his mouth, then nodded his head.

“Lemon coconut it is,” he said. “Can I go back to beating the fuck out of him now?”

“Yeah don’t let me stop you,” you said and grabbed another cupcake from the box to follow him to the guy.

It was quite obvious that Bucky had broken every single bone in his face considering how he looked. Blood was dripping from his nose and mouth, his breaths were leaving his bloodied lips in pained groans but he still managed to look up at you while you leaned sideways to the column close to you, nibbling on the cupcake.

“Oh isn’t this the princess?” he said with great difficulty but let out a groan when Bucky grabbed his throat to squeeze it.

“I didn’t say you could look at her,” Bucky said calmly and you grinned.

“Hi there,” you said, chewing on the cupcake. “You seemed more confident while you were chasing me with a car, huh?”

The guy let out a choked noise and Bucky tilted his head, then pulled his hand back so that he could breathe again.

“You fucking bitch…” the guy started but he didn’t get to finish his sentence when Bucky punched him in the stomach, knocking the breath out of his lungs. He coughed while Bucky shook his head slightly.

“He just doesn’t learn,” he told you and you shrugged your shoulders.

“They never do,” you said, turning to the guy. “That was very rude by the way. Someone should teach you some manners.”

The guy scoffed and spat out blood.

“Maybe someone should teach you, you spoiled slut—”

He didn’t get to say anything else when Bucky pulled out his knife and rammed it right into his kneecap, making him let out a howl of pain.

“Maybe,” you said, your voice completely calm. “It’s not going to be you who teaches me anything though.”

He tried to catch his breath while you popped the rest of the cupcake into your mouth, then tilted your head.

“Bucky?”

He looked over his shoulder. “Yes sweetheart?”

“Make him do it again.”

Bucky shot you a grin and twisted the knife, the guy’s scream echoing through the warehouse again.

Chapter 14

[babyleostuff]

Hiii!!! so I just read your cheol fic when he was being a dick for his s/o caring (it hurts... it's the beginning of the title, sorry brain is fried from uni) I was wondering if we could get the in-between of the fight like in the practice room after s/o left and everyone was shocked. mingyu fought him?? like gotta know what happened, anyway sorry if this is too long

hope yoyr day, night, evening, morning, or whatever time it is for you is going well!! your writing is so captivating too btw

-Nabi

thank you so much for your request 💜 hope you enjoy this!

you can find part 1 here

HURTS SO BAD | PART 2 | CHOI SEUNGCHEOL

summary | seungcheol’s pov from my previous fic

genre | angst

word count | 1k

pairing | choi seungcheol x gn!reader

“Fuck you, Seungcheol.”

Instantly, as these words escaped your mouth, he regretted every single thing he just said, praying that he could somehow turn back time. But there was nothing he could do now, the damage was done, and he simply watched you leave with a heartbroken expression.

He wanted nothing more than to crumble into a small ball and hide somewhere far from here. 

Despite the music still playing from the speakers, the silence in the room was almost deafening. Seungcheol could feel the hard stares from the boys, as they tried to wrap their heads around what just happened. 

“Did you actually lose your mind?” Jeonghan was the first to speak up. Seungcheol didn’t dare to look up and face the disappointed expressions of his friends. 

“Never in all those years we have been together have you ever said anything so cruel, no matter how fuck up things were. And now you lash out at your, mind you, partner for being worried about you?” Jeonghan scoffed, clearly angry at his bandmate. 

Seungcheol knew that there was nothing he could say or do to make this situation better, he only stood there with hunched shoulders and a tight throat. 

“What has gotten into me,” he thought.

Yes, he was stressed as hell, and everything irritated him lately, but he swore he would never take his anxiety out on you. Well, until now. 

The jacket you threw at him caught his attention, laying abandoned on the floor. Is this how you feel right now - left behind and neglected, by the person who was supposed to love you no matter what? He took a step to pick it up, still feeling the warmth of your body coming from it. 

“I’m going to fix this,” Seungcheol said quietly, putting the fabric to his chest. 

“Did I hear you right, hyung? You’re going to make it right?” laughed Mingyu, approaching the older one. “You just yelled at your partner and told them the worst things you could have ever possibly said. We can put up with your bitchy behavior, but that’s not an excuse to treat them like shit,” he said, clearly very agitated by the whole affair. 

“Let it go Mingyu, he knows what he has done. It’s his problem now how he’s going to get out of this shit,” said Jihoon, putting an arm on the taller’s shoulder to calm him down. 

“Yeah, but it doesn��t change the fact that he just basically emotionally abused one of my best friends.” 

“Hey, don’t you fucking dare saying I abused them in any way,” Seungcheol raised his voice at at younger boy, his emotions getting out of hand. “I know what I have done, and I’m going to make it right again,” he said, not exactly convinced himself. 

“So what, you think you'll buy them flowers, pout and make puppy eyes, and they'll forgive you?” he scoffed and crossed his arms, making him look bigger than he already was. 

“No, making puppy eyes is your thing, I’m not that cheap,” Seungcheol fired right back at him. 

With each exchange between Seungcheol and Mingyu the tension only escalated, the atmosphere becoming charged with a mix of anger, frustration, and hurt. Their tones harsh and cutting, both of them tried to defend their position. Sadness, and disappointment were evident on their faces, further fueling the intensity of the situation. 

“I messed up, alright? But you're acting like I hurt them on purpose-.” 

“Well, to us it looked like you wanted to-.” 

“Could you just stay the fuck away from my relationship and focus on your shitty love life?” 

The rest of the boys, who were skeptically watching what was going on, knew this wouldn’t end well. Mingyu might have been passive most of the time, letting the others walk over him and still not batting an eye, but when it comes to his friends and their well being, he wouldn’t just stand around and watch. 

Wonwoo who was standing by the mirrors slowly came up to Mingyu and patted his back. 

“There is no use Mingoo, you’re not helping here,” he said sternly. 

“Well, I have the right to be angry.” 

“No one said you didn’t, but let’s not add more fuel to the fire, okay?” 

Mingyu glared at Seungcheol for the final time, before turning around and walking out of the room. 

“I’m going to check up on him,” said Mingaho. 

As the tension evaporated the second Mingyu left, Seungcheol could feel his anger turn to sadness and powerlessness. Now not only has he hurt you, but also his friend, who was so dear to him. 

Seungcheol felt trapped, not knowing what to do next and feeling extremely mentally and emotionally drained. He sighed deeply with a blank stare, drained from all of his usual energy. 

With the silence still apparent, everyone parted ways to give Seungcheol some space. Only Jeonghan and Joshua stayed by his side, not knowing what to do. 

“What am I supposed to do now?” asked the oldest, with a tired voice. 

“We’re all here for you, Coups and you're not alone in this. Don’t worry about Mingyu for now, he’ll come around,” said Joshua. “Take a deep breath and try to think clearly about this.” 

“It's just that everything seems to be going wrong, and I feel like I have no control over it.”

“We know, but you should have just talked to them. Why didn’t you do it? Why did it have to come to this Coups?” asked Jeonghan. 

“I don’t know, I really don’t. I thought I was stronger than this, that it would pass and everything would be okay. I just didn’t want to be a burden to them.” 

“Well that didn’t end up too well,” said Joshua, laughing at Seungcheol’s pouting face. 

“Thank you for being here for me. I really need that right now.”

“Of course! That's what family is for. But that doesn’t change the fact that we’re all so pissed at you right now,” said Jeonghan. 

“Yeah, for a second there I thought Mingyu was going to punch me or something,” chuckled Sungcheol. 

“I wish he did,” muttered Joshua, and walked away quickly before the oldest could respond. 

“I’m going to make this right,” thought Seungcheol. “No matter what it takes.” 

[yuikomorii]

I got a question but I need an objective answer please. So I saw a lot of people complain about Yui being written in a very bad way in Ayato’s routes starting with More Blood and was curious if you think that she became a bad girlfriend as the story progressed?

// I will analyze Yui’s versions from Ayato’s routes and provide an answer at the end of this post.

More Blood:

Even from the first two chapters we are aware of the fact that Yui got a big crush on Ayato merely because of his looks and pleasure he gave her. At first sight, these reasons seem very superficial, but at the same time you can’t blame her completely for that. Yui went to a normal school and used to read magazines for teens, therefore it’s obvious she would have hormones and fall in love with someone who got features portrayed as the beauty standard.

It's understandable why some found her annoying, as she repeatedly cried for Ayato's love without making any real effort to earn it. Apart from giving him her blood, she didn't try to understand what he was going through, even when she noticed changes in him that made him crave so much blood.

Nevertheless, I believe that she did redeem herself in the last chapters, where she admitted being selfish and only thinking about her own desires, instead of focusing on Ayato’s struggles too. I know she paralyzed him out of jealousy and cheated on him in the bad endings, but in the good one, she’s actually a really loyal person. Yui waited years for Ayato to wake up from the coma and Ayato searched for Yui for years in his dream until he finally woke up. This ending confirmed the genuineness of their love.

In the After Story, Ayato planned to attend university for Yui's sake, aiming to get a job and buy a house. Yui helped Ayato with his studies and praised his skills. Initially, she fell for his looks, but in the After Story, she mentioned falling in love with him again because of his caring, determined, and hardworking personality.

Vandead Carnival & Lunatic Parade:

I really liked Yui in both of Ayato's routes and honestly, I can't find anything to criticize about her behavior.

It's not that Yui was a bad partner; it's just that Ayato was portrayed as too good, such as when he ran through flames for her or protected her from a bomb explosion. But that's likely because these are fan service games, where the love interests are designed to be your knights in shining armor. xD

Dark Fate:

I absolutely loved Yui’s portrayal in that route. It was the sweetest version of Yui I’ve ever seen, and I really enjoyed seeing her so happy and soft. Regarding her relationship with Ayato, he was truly the apple of her eye, lol.

The only problematic thing she did was pushing Ayato to face his abuser, Cordelia, even though he didn’t want to. I honestly don’t care if a character does something to another character, as long as it doesn’t affect them and the story, so since Ayato didn’t get mad at her for that, I didn’t mind it much either. However, from an objective point of view, I agree that doing such a thing is quite bad. Being in the presence of someone who ruined your life can trigger intense memories and forcing a confrontation removes the victim's agency in deciding how to cope with their trauma. Ayato might not have been mad at Yui for planning that, but if it had been Laito, I’m sure he would have shown why Yui was in the wrong.

Other than that, she was a kind and supportive girlfriend throughout the whole route, clearly having no ill intent, and I appreciate that she had an actual important role in the route.

Lost Eden:

Ok, I really can’t defend her anymore there. She literally had no redeeming qualities, no matter how many times she got the chance to fix herself. I discussed my thoughts about LE Yui in this post, but I’ll sum it up.

She tried to convince Ayato that despite Cordelia abusing him, she actually did it because she “cared about his future”, and then acted surprised when Ayato started feeling uncomfortable because of her words.

Yui knew the reasons behind Ayato’s behavior, yet when his brothers started mocking him, she didn’t even try to defend him. Everyone ganged up on Ayato, and he was on the verge of a panic attack, yet she remained silent.

Another terrible scene was in one of the last chapters, when Ruki admitted to turning the Vibora Clan and Church organization against Ayato out of envy, aiming to kill him. Instead of criticizing Ruki’s actions, Yui justified them and spoke ill of Ayato behind his back. I wouldn’t like to date someone who claims to love me but keeps hurting me without learning anything… It felt as if Ayato only continued being together with her because he had no one else. No wonder he didn’t marry her there.

Chaos Lineage:

I found Yui quite boring in CL in general, but she started off as determined and sweet in his route, so I liked that.

For most of the route, Yui’s entire personality seemed to revolve around Ayato, and she didn’t do much. There were many cheesy moments between them that made me cringe. Still, I’m sure a certain audience enjoyed those.

My only complaint is that when his brothers started treating Ayato unfairly, despite the fact that he came up with the idea of breaking the glass floor of the church, Yui did nothing to defend him, again.

However, I do appreciate that she gave him that adorable monologue. I just wish she had done it in front of others instead of only acting when Ayato was already insecure and sad.

Now… let’s see what kind of girlfriend Yui was in each route by judging her progress:

MB: Good

VC: Good

DF: Very good

LP: Good

LE: Very bad

CL: Decent

[melodiousmonk]

Ethan Hawke asks, "Why does masculine energy so often manifest itself as idiocy? Why is male sensitivity so often linked with perceived weakness? How does one be, as Johnny Cash said; ‘a dove with claws?'"

Kris Kristofferson takes a long beat, then says, “Yeah, that used to piss Shel Silverstein off.”

“What did?” Ethan asks.

“That whole ‘dove with claws’ thing. He just thought, ‘What the hell is that?'”

“Why do you think Cash said it?”

“I think he was feeling the very thing that you’re talking about ��� that if people think you are against the war, that in some way you’re a pussy.”

“Your first recorded song was a pro-Vietnam War song, right?”

“Yeah, I wrote it when I was in the Army on my way to Nashville, and I came upon a protest march. I had a lot of friends over there; and I was thinking we were fighting for freedom. And I wasn’t thinking very deeply.”

“Why did you end up changing your mind about that war?”

“I was flying helicopters in the Gulf of Mexico on one of those offshore oil rigs, and I was talking to some guys coming home. The stories they were telling me were so horrible that I think it just shocked me enough to change my thinking 180 degrees. I’m talking about things like this young vet telling me about taking people up in a helicopter and interrogating them and if they didn’t say what they were supposed to, they’d throw them out, stomping on the fingers of the prisoner holding on to the skids, you know? The guy telling me this particular story was still just a green kid when he returned from the war. The notion that you could make a young person do something so inhuman to another soldier – or even worse, a civilian – convinced me that we were in the wrong. I hadn’t been thinking in human terms of what that military action was.” He pauses, stroking my dog. “I agree with you totally about all the conditioning that makes us want to feel masculine and tough. I mean, I’m sure that’s why I went to Ranger School and Jump School. And I’m proud of that Ranger tab – still am. But the notion of bombing a defenseless country that’s never threatened us and the fact we all accepted it and said, That’s politics!’ Damn. I’m not really interested in polities. We’ve come to a place that I never dreamed and I know my father never dreamed that America would get to.

"That’s why Shel didn’t like that ‘dove with claws’ thing,” Kris goes on.

“Johnny Cash should have just said he was a dove and proud of it?”

“Exactly. ‘Cause people would have accepted anything from John,” says Kris. “We knew he was a man. I don’t really think anybody would have called Johnny Cash a pussy. But John was conditioned, just like you and me. You really have to get past all of that — where you have enough feeling about what’s right and wrong in the world to not give a shit about what kind of names anybody throws at you.

[Source - Rolling Stone Magazine]

[coffeegnomee]

Writing this because I don’t see anyone analyzing the Kab lore and I’m genuinely intrigued as to how people are viewing it.

It’s just such an interesting and all over the place story atm. I have a huge amount of faith that she will make an amazing story by the end of the season. I’m willing to let her cook. She has to get practice in this somehow.

But also she’s just so all over the place. And not really embracing the depth of mcrp, but that's a different story.

This started from having a hard time drawing the line between lore and not lore because I refuse to just say “Kab in the box was lore and everything else is not” even though I’m pretty sure that is like exactly how she views it. 

Because the moment Red killed her she went to chat and said something like “chat it only took me three weeks to get lore on the server!” Like girl it’s been lore. All of it is lore. 

And then the box arc was just like, enter the box angry at Red because he’s forcing you to hide, go through your friends and realize you care about them, go through the rest of the team and remember you f-ing hate all of them, including the friends at the start. Leave the box angry at Red, using pacifism as a cover to get close to Woogie to destroy Red. 

Like am I crazy to say that she didn’t change in the slightest because of the box and you could take that whole arc away and nothing would be different? 

But what IS interesting about that is how she never got over Red killing her. Never. I think she hoped that the box would soothe her out of that hate and come to a different conclusion, but by the end the (almost too real) rage about him killing her, especially after she made him that armor, pervades to this day. 

Now THAT’S lifesteal, holding the hurt until it has a real resolution, not trying to get yourself over it quicker. As Red said last season “we make our best content when we actually hate each other” (not a direct quote, Zam said it) and as uncomfortable as that is to blend real hate into the ability to tell a story, there is real truth to that, that unless you, You the Writer, actually Care about the stakes of the story, you’re not going to write a good story. And nothing makes you care more than actually caring.

But Kab puts up these walls around herself to delineate character vs streamer. She is, to her credit, quite good at being in character, to the point where when she drops the character it is so jarring to be told none of it is real, this is just lore. It’s wildly jarring. And makes it quite difficult to find her character to be endearing? At least for me. Because she consistently does little things to break the fourth wall like clearly having left the box to get materials. Girl PLEASE why did you not just include getting materials and being paranoid about being caught as a PART of that story?? Sigh. 

So she, in her mind, has a very clear distinction for what is her character. And a distinction for what she herself is willing to do. And that separation makes basically everything she says “in character” a lie; like she can say what she wants, be dramatic and make a cool tragic character, but that will not have a real meaning on who she is as a character on Lifesteal as a whole.

And what I find fascinating is that despite that, she is a mirror to whoever is in front of her. She absolutely becomes whatever the person in front of her is. 

She comes out of the box saying she will use pacifism to get to Woogie. But then Flame blows up spawn and she feels bad, so she talks to Zam and within 5 seconds you can tell she’s fully dedicated to that task. She fully embraces being pacifist. Because Zam is pacifist. 

But then Zam leaves to practice MCCR and next thing you know she’s talking to Wemmbu and within 5 seconds he convinces her to kill Planet publicly and with everyone online, breaking her away from pacifism. 

This also despite the fact that Wemmbu is Shit at instigating people like Zam and Pangi. He tried SO HARD to get them to kill him or change their views. But one devil on the shoulder to Flame got him to blow up spawn and one second with Kab got her to cave and kill Planet (TWICE! And get Mid’s heart!). SOOOO interesting how his approach works so wildly differently on new members vs old. 

So she mirrors whoever is around her. What a fascinating character trait out of the master manipulator. Is it manipulation? Or does she really fully and truly emotionally believe what she says in those moments? Does she come back with manipulation ideas after to fit whatever impulse she had in the moment? 

And then there’s the Mapicc castle. I 100% believe she was the one to blow it up. Maybe I’m just projecting. Maybe it was wemmbu during the window he had his pc and when he didn’t. Maybe it was someone else.

But she just declared herself evil. It’s only natural to try and instigate chaos and get the members blaming each other for things that you did. 

But she was SO GOOD during that conversation. Brainstorming and giving ideas for who else it could be, pinning the wemmbu heads on Mid but also pulling back and saying it couldn’t be her for the explosions, trying to work out the timeline. Like in so many ways she sounded like Spoke making up a story and being Unhelpful(TM). And she went out of her way to drive to her office just to have this conversation.

But also she seemed so helpful, so genuinely trying to brainstorm and pick apart this juicy puzzle in front of her. And therefore just curious, not manipulative. 

GAH I just can’t decide! She’s either completely brilliant or completely incompetent and succeeding by accident!

And it’s even more interesting given the thought that she came into Lifesteal riding the high of MoneySMP and how she pulled off a betrayal arc super well. But that was Kab vs rando content creators in the mcyt space. 

Now she’s Kab vs the very people who defined betrayal in mcyt. Everyone on lifesteal shares her ability to lie and manipulate. The thing that once made her unique is the very fabric of the server she is on. She thinks she’s got a leg up on everyone, but she’s merely on the same playing field. And that’s so dang interesting. Because she still doesn’t consider herself to merely be on the same playing field. She still thinks she’s better at this than anyone else. 

She said during the stream where Mane destroyed the Mice base (7/23/24) that she likes playing cocky characters because it makes the fall all the greater. But she just IS that cocky at times. Every time she’s jumped she’s giggly and cocky about being slick and avoiding being killed again because she sits on the respawn screen. 

So she’s cocky and willing to cause chaos, but she’s not the progenitor of chaos. She is not a worldender. She only causes chaos when someone nudges her towards it, not out of an internal desire to be chaotic and an understanding of the need for chaos on lifesteal.

And perhaps it’s because deep down, she cares about the people on the server. Not in the way Zam cares where he feels awful about everything he does that is evil and repents and has remorse over his actions. 

But she is affected by her caring. One of the most interesting moment of Kab lore was when she saw the photo of Mane standing in the blown up Mice base. 

KAB: “wow […] I knew he would blow it up, but like seeing the image is still like, fuck”

CLOWN: “really?” 

KAB: “THIS HASN’T HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE” 

CLOWN: “hasn't it happened to you like twice?” 

KAB: “he didn’t blow it up last time [...] I think, I think I have to leave. I think I should leave. I’m putting like hannah and red and leo at risk right now” 

It’s an involuntary reaction, something that is intrinsic to her core. She immediately went to: I should stop being on this team so I can save Hannah and Leo. I don’t want to see them get hurt. 

And this is before she knew Woogie was wanting to leave the Mice because he thought she was a threat!

This was before Red killed her! 

She came to this conclusion that she was dangerous to her friends outside of them agreeing with it. 

And she never brought this back up when she was in the box. She to this day thinks she did nothing intrinsically wrong (ie dangerous to others) by antagonizing Mane. At least as a character she refuses to accept this. But for a second there Kab Kaboodle came through and knew that to be an intrinsic fact. And then she didn’t expand on it. Missed opportunity tbh. 

And then I’ll end with an analysis of the Mane conversation after he blew up the base. Because it’s so interesting to see Kab banter in lore (though I suppose from her pov it wasn’t lore yet because this was before Red killed her) and see her say Way Too Much. She says she’s a master manipulator but girl you leak freaking everything. 

So, she says what she said above, then a few minutes later gets in vc with Mane.

MANE: “you didn’t think I had the guts.. To blow up the base of [unintelligible]” 

KAB: “[talking over him] you didn’t blow up the other one”

This whole conversation Kab interrupts Mane so much. She has to say things, to prove herself. Even when staying silent would give her so much more information.

MANE: “I’m gonna be honest, I was just looking for a reason” 

Every pvper on lifesteal ONLY acts evil when they have a reason. It’s so consistent. It’s never “just because”.

Kab says she put posters up of him bc she thought it was funny. 

 MANE: “yeeaa I find it funny too um. You said you're not scared which, I- I find pretty amusing” 

KAB: “ok!” 

MANE: “because you're obviously pretty scared” 

KAB: “you’re not scary. Dude. like your strength of the sword doesn’t fucking scare me dude. When you actually get smart and shit then then come talk to me” 

Super cocky. Super dismissive. Just looking for a power dynamic to make her regain control over the situation. That’s not manipulation that’s just a power grab.

MANE: “Ok. I’ll talk to you when I get smart I guess but I mean, I dunno, according to these dogs here you've been at, at the deepest level of the cave for for a while, almost like you’re hiding. [pause, Kab freezes and pulls up coords] am I right about that? That seems pretty scared to me. I dunno. But um” 

Mane absolutely cooks in this conversation but Kab just refuses to be affected by his lines and instead mocks him for being stereotypically tough guy. And yet she got scared there. She brought up her coords. 

KAB: “[scoff] alright buddy” 

MANE: “I dunno the way that you’re like, you're like interacting and the way that you’re like going about this is not the way that I would go about it personally”

KAB: “well, we’re very different people” 

MANE: “I mean. Okay. how do I rephrase this. The way that you’re going about this is not the way any other person has gone about this before” 

KAB: “thank you!” 

MANE: “it’s not a complement.” 

KAB: “I think it’s a complement. I appreciate that” 

MANE: “I’m calling you stupid.” 

KAB: “I try to be original” 

MANE: “you’re being stupid” 

KAB: “maybe in your eyes yea” 

MANE: “cause you’re gonna make a new base, I mean, you haven't even stopped to question how I found this one, which is quite interesting.” 

He’s calling her stupid for not asking more questions. Especially after she just called HIM the stupid one. He’s clearly smarter than he looks

KAB: “oh I know how you found it” 

MANE: “how did I find it” 

KAB: “my team already told me, I’m not telling you” 

Instead of fishing for more information, playing dumb, Kab instead goes for posturing that she is far smarter than him. She could’ve used this to make him think she’s stupid or to actually learn how he found the base so she can be safer in the future (later she tells chat the she has no idea how he found the base). And interesting move out of someone who wants to manipulate people. Usually you would want to play dumb, not play cocky.

MANE: “[scoff] you don’t know how I found that base” 

KAB: “okay! You can believe that” 

MANE: “yea, because if you did, there’s no secret to keep from me. Like the way I found the base myself”

KAB: “[interrupting] girl you know I don’t use that base right?” 

MANE: “okay. That’s your teammate’s base” 

KAB: “that’s fair. That is my teammate’s base. I more feel bad for them rather than me.” 

MANE: “yea. Yea. I feel bad for them too. It would suck to like, like, if I had a teammate, you know, especially considering like the fact that you, you- overall you’re team’s isn’t like the most skilled um if I was always suffering the consequences of my teammate’s actions who obviously doesn’t care about what they say” 

He’s using the info Woogie gave him to make her feel bad/see if she does feel bad AND SHE DOESN’T HIDE A SINGLE THING!

KAB: “girl if you’re trying to guilt me it’s not gonna work” 

MANE: “I’m not trying to guilt you, I I’m just saying like, if I was your teammate I- I would feel horrible, you know? You’re like” [.... devolves as mane is like if you want to loose teammates you can, and kab goes don’t mansplain to me (again, being cocky. refusing to be scared)] 

MANE: “even if you’re not scared, you’re putting your teammates in jeopardy, which you clearly already know, which is very interesting, very interesting trait for someone who cares about her team. So. I just wanted talk to you and get your consensus on the situation” 

He was fully going to stop the conversation there. But she just missed the cue and started to willingly gave him more information because her adhd ass thought that was a question not a statement /pos

KAB: “yea.. I’m I’m not overly fussed. It’s inconvenient. and that’s about it. It’s inconvenient” 

MANE: “for who?” 

KAB: “me” 

She’s revealing that her motivations on lifesteal revolve around herself. She cares more about herself than teammates in the long run. Like I said earlier, she intrinsically does care about people, but on lifesteal in particular she will first care about herself. 

MANE: “oooooh. See but you just said you care about your teammates and [unintelligible]”

KAB: “I do, but let’s be real two of them don’t log on very often and Leo’s been doing his own thing anyway. So” 

MANE: “oh. I guess you’re team’s already disbanded so” Mane brings back up how he just wanted to see what she thought about it. Again she just keeps talking.

KAB: “I think you’re being predictable and I think that’s helpful” 

MANE: “aw yea bro, glad I could help out”

[…more chatting] 

MANE: “If hiding doesn’t mean that you’re scared, I don’t know what hiding means” 

KAB: “I mean not everything has to have and emotional reaction” 

MANE: “I mean it’s not really an emotional reaction: if you’re hiding you’re scared of something” 

KAB: “scared is an emotion” 

MANE: “nah, fear is an emotion” DAMN SON. he really can just drop the dramatic bars bro. 

KAB: “fear is an emotion. I say being fearful and being scared is the same thing.” 

MANE: “if you weren’t fearful you wouldn’t be hiding” 

KAB: “that's not necessarily true” 

MANE: “how” 

KAB:” okay-” 

MANE: “hold on hold on hold on. [wanting direct clarification] Before we get into that, you’re saying that you’re not scared.” 

KAB: “no. [laughing at him]” 

MANE:” You’re not scared at all”

KAB: “no. I’m not scared at all” 

MANE: “Okay. as long as we get that out of the way” 

KAB: “I’m just not an idiot. But I’m not scared at all, no.” 

MANE: “okay. Ooooh, so you’re saying like the smart thing to do is hide” 

(/genuinely realizing this in real time. He did not understand this until this very moment)

KAB: “I mean, yea. Let’s be realistic. You are much better at pvp than I am and you have more hearts than me [ect] I’m doing it because it’s the right thing to keep my survival. HOLY SHIT I JUST REALIZED A PARALLEL. You’re a lion and I’m a rabbit” [derailed, mane says he got what he wanted, thinks she got something out of it too] 

KAB: “can I ask you one thing quickly?” 

This, I think, is the only thing Kab actually cared to ask this whole conversation. She was not being purposeful in anything else, just responding to what Mane was saying and saying things. But she wasn’t really listening to what was happening, she was too focused on looking tough and explaining herself. Until this moment.

MANE: “mmmhm?” 

KAB: “why did you go after my base and try and kill me? Was it the posters? Is that why?” 

MANE: “well, the posters were just a good reason” 

KAB: “you just want to do it?” 

MANE: “I’m gonna be honest. It’s just fun” 

KAB: “oooh. So I did categorize you correctly. Ok cool!” 

MANE: “[sad] ooh. okay.“ 

Leaves call KAB: “yea Mane is just as predictable as I thought he was”

Clown comes back in vc KAB: “[explaining the convo] he just wants to. He just thinks it’s fun. He’s just a crazy villain. I told you!” 

But like, I don’t think it’s that. I think we learned that you can get Mane to hunt someone very very easily, just give him a small excuse and he’ll gladly do it. Which is useful if you want a villain or want someone to hunt you. So in that way he is super predictable. But he isn’t “a crazy villain” the posters were just an excuse, an excuse he had been looking for. Because he wants an excuse. That is very different than pure “it was for the fun”. 

The fact that she comes to the conclusion that he’s just a crazy villain after that conversation is crazy. I feel like she just was looking for confirmation for a hypothesis she had rather than really looking for research to see who Mane is. 

Which is a huge flaw for someone who wants to figure out why people are the way they are so you can manipulate them. 

I feel like Mane, if he is smart, learned far far more information about her than she did from him.

The tension for the Kab lore here lies in how this will all blow up in her face. I think she will cling to things and copium her way into believing she won no matter what. But she will have been absolutely destroyed. 

And I keep getting hit with her being incompetent because she like, wildly, and I mean WILDLY, makes wrong assumptions about the older Lifestealer’s motivations.

Which is crazy to me because she WAS a viewer! She, in theory, (but probably not in practice because no cc has enough time to watch another smp with as much attention to detail and analysis that we do) should have a really solid understanding of the crew, and she self reports that she does but she’s been wrong so many times. 

Like not only does she get Mane completely wrong here, but when Spoke logged on one night and said he was betraying the empire because of jepex she flat out believed him??? And like brought it up again later like it was true. 

She thinks Zam has a huge plan of becoming evil. She had this whole moment in the box where she mansplained to chat that we are being fooled by him. We were being gaslit by him into thinking he isn’t planning on being evil at the end. And it was just so painful to watch because she’s just so wrong. 

Because Zam has never ever thought of his lore like that. He’s reactionary to the extreme, believing he will take the current lore to the end of the season regardless of how early it is in the season. He becomes evil by the end more often than he doesn’t, but it’s not premeditated. And she should know that. 

And she assumed that Red wouldn’t kill her. Like, no, I didn’t see it coming either, but it was a very Reddoons move. To take it personal when someone causes him anxiety. There were other small assumptions she made on older life stealer motivations that I can’t remember now. 

But to clear it out, what motivates Kab Kaboodle?? She hates not being believed. That’s what I took from all this. This is her trigger, the thing that will motivate her forward. 

Because she does lie and manipulate. And that relies upon being believed. So when someone believes something that isn’t true about her (like Red’s assumptions that she was leaking info to Clown) it hurts a hell of a lot more. 

But because she lies, nobody will ever believe her when she desperately tries to get them to believe the truth.

So yea. What do you guys think about Kab and her lore? 

[demigod-shenanigans]

Credit where credit is due because it was @poppitron360 bringing up Jason’s extended family in a fic that made me think about this.

Anyway. I think Leo deserves some closure with his extended family, too. Obviously it’s never going to happen with his shitty aunt. However. He has a cousin.

His name is Raphael. We don’t really know anything about him except that he bullied Leo when they were kids (that’s the only half-sentence mention he gets). Obviously this isn’t a great start, but I think it makes sense in context.

Rosa never liked Leo. Maybe it was a superstition thing. Maybe she took issue with the fact that his dad wasn’t in the picture. Maybe she convinced herself that he’d somehow ruined her sister’s life. Either way, of course her behaving that way and talking badly about him affected her own kid.

Raphael also didn’t really get Leo, who went on about boring machine stuff Raphael didn’t care about for ages and just wouldn’t shut up. Who’d only play in very specific ways and get upset when Raphael tried to change the rules. He was weird, and Raphael didn’t like him, so he was mean to Leo.

When Rosa tells him Leo is going away and he’ll never have to see him again, Raphael isn’t upset. He takes his mom at her word that it was Leo’s fault his aunt died.

But Raphael was nine, then.

(I’m putting most of this under the cut because it got incredibly long. Oops. Fair warning, I did make myself weep writing this.)

Raphael doesn’t think about Leo for years. They were never close. He’s just a weird kid that used to be a family member but that they’re not seeing anymore. Raphael has friends and school to worry about. Leo doesn’t even cross his mind.

But then he’s packing for college, going through boxes in the attic, and there’s two that look weirdly different from the rest. He’s curious and opens them. It’s mementos. Pictures of Esperanza, and of Leo, and a whole bunch of random trinkets taken from their apartment after the workshop burnt down. And suddenly he’s wondering what happened to his baby cousin, ashamed he hasn’t thought of Leo in so long.

So he asks his mom. Rosa shrugs and tells him Leo went into the foster system and they’ll thankfully never have to deal with him again. That if there’s any justice in the world, he’s dead, because it’s his fault that his mom died.

Raphael is horrified to hear her talk like that. Leo was eight. Even if he did make a stupid mistake that somehow led to his mom dying—and he isn’t nine anymore, he won’t just take his mom’s word for it this time—that’s more traumatizing to Leo than anything. And he was just left alone to deal with it all. A child with so much blame on his shoulders, made to feel like his family didn’t love him.

He’s kicking himself for not asking about Leo sooner. For not being nicer to him when they were kids. For not being there for him when his mom died.

He asks which foster home Leo went to, and his mom snaps at him to drop it. But Raphael doesn’t drop it. He asks his dad when he gets home, and his dad tells him.

It’s a dead end. Leo hasn’t been there in years. Ran away after a few days, apparently. It’s a miracle the person he calls even remembers who he’s talking about.

There’s nothing he can do about it now. But he takes the boxes along to college. If Leo can’t have them, the least Raphael can do is keep them far away from his mom. He puts up a picture of Esperanza and little Leo along with the ones of his own friends. Because if all he can do is carry their memory, he will.

The question of what happened to Leo never quite lets Raphael go. He tries a few avenues over the years, but it’s like Leo vanished into thin air. The only solace he has is that he doesn’t find any obituaries that fit.

Eventually, he decides to look into becoming a foster parent with his wife, and that’s how he finally finds Leo. One of the older social workers mentions she knew a Valdez boy that would be around his age now. Got into a whole bunch of trouble. Ran away from several different foster homes. He was sent to Wilderness School in Nevada the last time she saw him. Apparently ran away with a classmate—Piper McLean. Never heard from him again after that.

She only remembers because Piper is the daughter of a film star she really liked at the time. It’s just a weird random anecdote to her.

But Raphael knows Piper McLean. Not well—they’ve never really talked—but he’s seen her at an office party or two because she’s married to one of his coworkers. Reyna works in a different department, but he could talk to her. Ask her if Piper knows what happened to Leo. If maybe they’re still in contact, though that seems like a long shot after so many years.

He’s desperate and terrified to maybe, finally, get some kind of answer.

It takes him two weeks to work up the courage to talk to Reyna. She’s confused at first. They’ve only made smalltalk a few times, most of it work related.

But when he brings up Leo, something in her face changes. Yes, she knows Leo. He’s never mentioned a cousin—Raphael isn’t surprised—but she supposes a cousin could exist. She asks what he wants from Leo, and he’s honest with her about the fact that they didn’t have a great relationship growing up but tells her he’s grown since then and that he still has some stuff that rightfully belongs to Leo that’s been sitting in boxes in his house for years.

She gives him Leo’s number, albeit with some reluctance.

He calls and tells Leo that he gets if he doesn’t want to talk to him but at the very least he wants him to have the boxes with Esperanza’s things—boxes that should have been his in the first place. Leo doesn’t even have to see him if he doesn’t want to. Raphael can just drop the boxes off with Reyna or something. But he wanted to apologize for being a jerk when they were kids, because Leo didn’t deserve that.

———————

Leo is shocked to hear from Raphael, to say the least. When he first hears the name of the person on the other end of the line, he freezes up. He barely manages to keep it together for the call and afterwards, he melts into Jason’s arms and starts weeping because a part of him is terrified that this is some sort of cruel prank. Terrified to let himself hope he actually has a relative on his mom’s side of the family that cares. Terrified of whatever might or might not be in those boxes.

But he agrees to meet Raphael, if reluctantly, and he brings Jason. Maybe there’ll be some closure in it. He’s wary, because his cousin was really mean to him when they were kids, but they were also eight and they’re adults now and he realizes kids sometimes do dumb shit when they’re eight and growing up with terrible adults.

Leo is anxious when they walk into the restaurant where they’re meeting for lunch—Jason promises to lightning bolt Raphael through the nearest wall if he starts shit, which makes Leo laugh and relax a little, and they walk in holding hands.

Raphael spots them and his whole face lights up. He looks so different from how he looked as a kid, but there’s still that same scar on his forehead from the time he ran into a table when they were six. He still has the same eyes twinkling with mischief, but they’re not malicious now. He looks genuinely happy to see Leo.

Raphael is clearly nervous meeting Jason, who’s much taller and much more muscular than him, which Leo takes great joy in. And Leo gets the apology he was promised. He’s shocked to hear how long Raphael has been looking for him—shocked that apparently someone on his mom’s side of the family did care about what happened to him. And Raphael doesn’t even ask about his mom. Doesn’t ask what happened, which Leo was terrified he would. He just tells Leo he won’t believe the bs his mom is spouting about him anymore, and he’d like to be at least a little involved in Leo’s life, if Leo wants that. Even if it’s just the occasional call or Christmas postcard. But if Leo wants nothing to do with him after everything, he understands that. He’s just glad to know that Leo is safe and happy and loved.

Leo tells him he’ll think about it.

Jason sits with him when he finally brings himself to open the boxes. There’s so many pictures—several framed ones that they had up on the walls and a whole photobook with pictures of Leo, from birth until age eight. There’s several pictures of just him, and several of the two of them together. The last few pages are empty—memories they never got to make—and all of it is so incredibly painful but he can’t believe he gets to have all of this. Jason holds him through it, stroking his back and kissing his hair and telling him they can take breaks whenever he wants. Leo spends all night telling his husband so many half-forgotten stories of his mom as they look through the pictures.

There’s more in the boxes. A few of Esperanza’s tools. Her lucky screwdriver. An old folder with project sketches she made all the way back at uni that she’d sometimes show Leo drafts of. Random decorative items they had up around the house, many of them hand-crafted. There’s this tiny toy dragon his mom made him as a consolation when he was small and begging for some cool toy they absolutely couldn’t afford and Leo cannot stop crying when he finds it.

Also up there with the photos and the dragon on the list of things that make Leo weep the most is a thick notebook that’s halfway coming apart. It’s got pages torn from magazines and hastily written notes stuffed into it. Some pages have prints glued on them, others are hand-written, in his mom’s hand and different ones Leo doesn’t recognize. A lot of it is faded, and some of the pages have clearly had water spilled on them by accident, but most of it is still legible.

It’s his mom’s old cookbook.

And it’s so much less of her than he should have. But having all those memories back that he thought he’d lost forever means everything.

But after a full night of weeping in Jason’s arms and a lot of cooking (and making sure the cookbook is no longer at a risk of fading or falling into bits when you breathe on it) and even more processing he shoots his cousin a message that just says “I think I like the idea with the Christmas cards”.

And they’re never going to be best friends or anything. I don’t think Leo ever tells Raphael the truth of who he is or what happened to his mom.

But they talk to each other on the phone sometimes. Leo meets Raphael’s wife, and, eventually, his kids. Raphael meets Sofía a handful of times and sends her birthday gifts and Christmas cards every year.

He’s the reason Sofía gets to grow up with her abuela’s cooking and with pictures of Esperanza scattered around the Waystation, and Leo is always going to be grateful for that.

I’m assuming like three people total will read this all the way to the end at most! Thank you for putting up with today’s specific Leo brain worms. Not sure if this will ever be a proper fic because I have way too many ideas but have this for now

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

So, you have been in a relationship for a while and you’re ready and eager to take the next step - but your partner isn’t. What now? 

The “next step” I’m referring to here could mean a lot of different things because relationships do not all follow one specific timeline (and also because my readers may be of wildly different ages and live in wildly different situations) but I am thinking of any “deepening our commitment” things here: for example introducing them to your friends or your family, moving in together or (if you are in a situation where that’s a legal possibility) even marriage or having a child together. 

Whatever the step actually looks like, you may have this romantic idea of “If they’re right for you, you’ll always naturally want to take these steps at the same time”… but that’s not really how relationships work in real life. Even in the healthiest relationship and even if you absolutely feel like they’re your soulmate, you may still disagree on when to take those steps or even on whether you want to take these steps at all. 

In fact, it’s uniquely frustrating if everything else is going well. If their refusal to meet your mom is just another point on the long list of behaviors that make you feel like they don’t really care about you, that’s also painful but it’s easier to give advice there: maybe you should think about breaking up. It’s tempting to believe that you can make them love you more if you move in with them or that they’ll treat you better once you get engaged, but that won’t work out. You can’t fix a broken relationship by deepening the commitment - commitment needs a stable foundation to grow. And this doesn’t only go for outright abusive relationships: they may be a wonderful person but you two just have entirely different goals and needs, and those won’t suddenly overlap more just because you moved in with them or married them. 

With all that being said: if there IS a healthy and stable foundation, if you are happy in every other aspect and they’re just hesitant about this one specific step, then jumping straight to “break up with them” would obviously be pretty unhelpful advice. Differing opinions occur even in the most compatible couple, you are both whole people with your own individual feelings and those do not necessarily doom the whole relationship. It’s important to see this situation in the context of the relationship in general. 

You may be able to guess that a big portion of the advice is just gonna be “Communicate with your partner” - but first of all, I’d advise you to have an open and honest conversation with yourself. Why is this step of commitment so important to you? What does it mean to you? Do you feel a sense of urgency in taking it and if so, why? Is this specific step the only possible path for your need to be met? Are you open to alternative approaches, are you open to waiting (and if so, for how long)? The purpose of these questions is definitely not to convince yourself to give up on your needs or to talk yourself into a compromise you’re not really happy with! The opposite of that, actually: It’s helpful to reflect on what exactly you want and why you want it, so you have the clarity you need to discuss it productively. You don’t want to agree to something that ultimately leaves you unsatisfied and bitter, but you also don’t want to push hard for something you later on realize doesn’t even mean that much to you. 

When you feel confident enough about your own stance to discuss it with your partner, the most important thing to remember is: you’re on the same team. The goal here isn’t to “win” or to change their mind, but to see each others perspective better and find a solution you’re both happy with. Listen with an open mind. Try to understand before you try to influence. Remind yourself that your partner isn’t your enemy, they also want the best outcome for both of you - otherwise you (hopefully) wouldn’t want to commit to them! 

Something you should get clarification on during your conversations: is it a hard no (do not want to do that at all ever), a soft no (open to alternatives or adjustments), a no for now (want to do it but not yet), a yes but (want to do it but only under certain circumstances or in a different way than your original plan) or a I don’t know? How does this affect your feelings on the situation? (I’m sure that even just while reading these different scenarios, some instinctively feel better or worse than others! But it’s still important to take some time to sit with any new information that comes up during those conversations. Neither of you should feel pressured or rushed here!) 

You may find that they just never considered that there may be multiple approaches to that step (an example for this would be that they are not actually opposed to the idea of being married to you, just to the idea of a wedding, and didn’t consider yet that eloping is also a possibility) - but don’t set yourself up for disappointment by expecting the conversation to 100% go that way. It may also be a hard no, and that wouldn’t make them a horrible person. People can deeply, truly love someone and still do not want to take certain steps with them. It’s a good idea to remind yourself that you’re not “in the right” or “the better person” for wanting to take those steps. While certain steps may be a big part of your own future plans or even of your identity and self-image (and that’s valid!), they are just personal preferences. It’s not a moral obligation to want them, and your partner isn’t mean for not wanting them. But, of course, at this point we also need to say: if you can not imagine a life where you never get married, you are not a horrible person for breaking up with a partner who can not imagine to ever marry. “Irreconcilable differences” are a common breakup reason for a reason. 

So, to summarize: Building a strong foundation is crucial before taking big steps. Communicate openly with yourself first - understand why you want to take this step and if there are alternatives. When talking to your partner, remember you're a team; it's not about winning but understanding each other. Be open to different responses, from a clear no to conditions on a yes. Do not pressure your partner but do not completely give up on your own happiness either. 

The journey of commitment should be a shared adventure - not a battle or a competitive race! 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad 

[haespoir]

cave me in: mkl.

⨯ pairing: plug!mark x reader

⨯ word count: 1.3k 

⨯ summary: haechan introduces you to his dealer friend, and mark lee makes it so hard to keep the relationship strictly business. not that you minded anyways. 

⨯ warnings: mentions of drugs (weed), some suggestive content, i think thats it enjoy :3

⨯ playlist: cave me in, gallant / half moon, dean / wfm, realestk 

⨯ extra content: part two

⨯ a/n: im completely normal about mark lee i swear ty @markonthemoon​ for furthering my completely normal feelings about mark lee... there might be a part two. 

. . . 

It had been at least 3 hours since you had picked up edibles from Mark. Three whole ass hours, and yet he was still laying on his bed feeling less than whole. Who did you buy them for? Were you getting high with someone else? Was it a guy? 

The first time Haechan had introduced you to him he didn’t pay it any mind. You were a close friend of the younger male’s situation-ship… Whatever the fuck that was. But it was no more than that in his eyes. You were someone who occasionally bought from him, and you were always so polite about it too. And for some unknown reason, or at least unknown to him, that bothered him. A few weeks later, a not-so-sober conversation with Haechan revealed that Mark had a crush on you. One he denied vehemently. Though he guessed out of everyone he sold to, you were the most ideal to date. 

Who the fuck said anything about dating? 

Mark shakes his head as if to rid himself of such wild thoughts. “I’m just hungry,” he says to himself, thinking of ways he could fill that empty void in his stomach. If only he knew, there was no amount of food that would help him feel whole. He grabs his phone, shooting a quick text to someone who knew would also be high at this time. 

mark [11:48 pm]: ramen?  jungwoo [11:50 pm]: and netflix?  jungwoo [11:50 pm]: mark… are you asking me to hook up?  jungwoo [11:51 pm]: say less baby i’m otw!  mark [11:53 pm]: dude what mark [11:53 pm]: no, just ramen  jungwoo [11:55 pm]: mark lee you want me so bad  mark [11:57 pm]: hurry before i change my mind

Jungwoo’s texts cause Mark to roll his eyes, but he grabs his keys. “Yo, Haechan,” he calls out, peeking into the male’s LED-lit room. On his monitor, he sees a discord call and what he believes is your profile picture. Why were you on call with him? “I’m going get ramen with Zeus, want anything?” 

“Nah, I’m going over to my girl’s in a bit,” Haechan replies, smoothly muting the call as he gives his roommate his attention. “I’ll just see you in the morning?” Mark hums, and he’s out the door quickly. He doesn’t want to even think about the relationship between you and Haechan, not when there’s a green little monster creeping through his veins. 

Once Haechan is sure Mark is gone, he’s unmuting the call. “Personally, I think he’s into you.” 

Though he can’t see it, you’re rolling your eyes. “Haechan, you’re just saying that. You’re tired of me third wheeling?” 

“Listen... Your words, not mine, sweetheart,” he says simply. 

“Whatever dude,” you sigh, rolling onto your side on your bed. “Have fun with your shawty. I’m going to sleep.” 

“Just ask him to smoke you out or something,” Haechan says, like it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. “I’m leaving.” 

You hear the noise of him leaving the call before you can even reply, and you’re once again rolling your eyes. You didn’t understand how your friend was into Haechan. What a fucking brat. 

I mean, you can’t just ask someone to smoke you out, right? Isn’t that something that’s offered? You groan loudly at the thought, locking your phone and tossing it on the floor. “Fuck you, Haechan,” you think bitterly. Why the hell did he have to put that godforsaken idea in your mind? 

Because the idea doesn’t leave your mind for weeks after that night. Every time you buy from Mark, you find it harder and harder to deny your attraction to the male. His actions don’t help much either. In fact, you’re convinced you’re delusional. There was no other reason. 

You had mentioned you liked rice krispie treats, and suddenly Mark has rice krispie treat edibles. With extra marshmallows no less.  

One time you heard your friends complaining that Mark had increased his prices. Which was odd because you were spending less on weed than you ever had before. Maybe they were just buying more? 

Or sometimes there’s a small baggie of only the clear gummy bears with the things you buy from him. It’s not like you had told him that the only valid flavor of gummy bears was the clear ones. 

These things weren’t just coincidences, right? Or were they? Haechan also liked marshmallow treats, so maybe they were for him. You had taken a liking to edibles, so you weren’t smoking as much as you used to. Meaning you were spending less money anyways. And Mark said that he liked the red gummy bears the most, so surely, you were just getting the ones he didn’t like. 

You let out a loud groan, ignoring the call from Haechan on Discord. Instead, you opt to shove your face into your pillow before letting out a small scream. Mark Lee was driving you absolutely crazy. 

Perhaps if you picked that call up, the text messages that flashed on your screen 30 minutes later would not have sent you into the panic that they did. 

mark [12:20 am]: yo mark [12:20 am]: i got a new strain  mark [12:20 am]: let me smoke you out? 

Maybe Haechan wasn’t a brat, and maybe you would thank him for this at your wedding years later. But none of that matters when Mark Lee is asking to smoke you out. 

you [12:29 am]: uh yea you [12:29 am]: my place?  mark [12:32 am]: say less mark [12:32 am]: i’ll bring your favorite gummies

He does bring them, and he does smoke you out. Which is why you find yourself in the position that you do. You’re sitting on the floor in your living room, your cheek pressed against Mark’s knee as he sits on your couch. You swear he looks perfect from this angle; his hair is pushed back by a headband he had stolen from you a few days ago, claiming he thought it was like a personal head massage device. You can see the way his eyes are slightly red, and you’re sure yours look exactly like his. Most importantly, his neck is on display, and you want to do nothing more than mark it up. It takes everything in you to not climb into his lap and do exactly that. 

“You look like a puppy,” Mark says, running his fingers through your hair, stopping when he reaches your ear. He’s rubbing small circles on your earlobe with this thumb, his eyes drinking in the sight of you. “My puppy.” 

God, Mark Lee was dangerous. Absolutely lethal. You groan at his words, pressing your face into his thigh to hide away from him. Unfortunately for you, this has the opposite effect, and there is no such thing as hiding from him. The sight of you nearly burying your face into his lap like this does wonders for Mark’s confidence. 

“Come here.” It’s a demand from him, and it’s one that you quickly listen to as he guides you to straddle his lap. In this new position, Mark’s hands quickly go to your thighs; the grip he has is almost bruising. But you don’t mind it, not when Mark’s got his head resting on the back of your couch and he’s staring at you in a way that makes you nervous. 

“Sorry for making you wait,” he says, and you’re feeling a bit confused. “Haechan might have given me a hint or two.” 

The confusion is gone quickly; you were going to strangle that kid. 

Mark laughs at the look on your face, easily reading the emotions as if you were an open book to him. “Don’t think about it, we’ve got a lot of time to make up for.” 

And when Mark Lee presses a kiss against your jaw, his hands traveling under your shirt, you know you’re done for. 

[devieuls]

The way of love pt.X

Neteyam Sully x Tayrangi Fem Reader (Na'vi)

Warning of the Serie: MDNI. Dom Neteyam x Fem Reader; SMUT; ANGST; FLUFF; Dirty Talk; Fangs; Bites; Blood; Spit; Power Play; Jealousy and Possessiveness; Foreplay; violence; Swearing; Teasing; Unprotected Sex; Enemies (because of you, Neteyam treats you well). Aged characters: Neteyam 19 y.o / You 18 y.o. SERIE

Synopsis: After a great loss happened in your family, you are forced to take a role that before did not belong to you, following a path that you will feel like your only in time. Just when you thought you were finally overcoming the loss, your clan shows up with those you blame for the great offense received. You are the daughter of the first Olo'eykte of all clans and are about to take your mother’s place to lead the Tayrangi clan, but first you must follow Neteyam (the eldest son of the man you detest with all your heart) To train him, despite your contempt for the Sullys and everything about them, you inevitably bond with the boy, unknowingly falling in love with him.

CHAPTER WARNING: ///////

Lenght : 6k

Notes: This chapter is perhaps one of my favorites, after this, will miss only the last chapter (chapter 11) and then the series will be finished. Enjoy the plot twist and leave a comment to let me understand what the chapter was like

NA'VI WORDS: 'ITE: Daughter; SA'NU: Mother; YAWNETU: Darling; NGATSYIP: Little you; PARULSYIP: Children; TANHI: Star/Bioluminescent freckles; YAWNTUTSYìP: Darling

Character Cast: NEY'NARI: Your dead sister; IKEYNI: Your Mother; TSENTEY: Your Father; YÌMKXA: Your Ikran; ULEYTE: Your bestie; TUL'PEY: Your future Mate; REYIN'AL: Neteyam's future mate and daughter of Ninat

CLOTHES AND APPEARANCE: You ; Neteyam; Reyin'al

PART: 1 ; 2 ; 3 ; 4 ; 5 ; 6 ; 7 ; 8 ; 9 ; 10 ; 11 the end

· · ─────── · 𖥸 · ─────── · ·

Then why did your heart beat so fast at the thought of his eyes in love and enchanted as he looked at yours?

The morning came too early for your taste, the sea breeze and the sun’s rays forced you to wake up in a bad mood. A long sigh came out of your mouth when you remembered that today you were going to go to the Omatikaya clan, already feeling the pains in your stomach that made you regret even waking up.

You got up off the carpet, hearing your mother’s voice calling you already impatiently, almost certainly as she loaded her personal belongings on her Ikran, yelling at your father to do the same. You took advantage of the fact that Ikeyni seemed focused on yelling at your father to take a few minutes to eat some fruit and sneak out, to go say goodbye to Uleyte.

"Where do you think you’re going? Come back here and start loading your ikran." Your mother’s voice prevented you from implementing your escape plan, you sighed heavily before nodding and doing as she had asked.

For the next twenty minutes you loaded your items on your Ikran, doing everything slowly and unwillingly, hoping your mother would change her mind and tell you to stay home, but she didn’t. She turned her back on you by continuing to do what she was doing, not wanting to know of any protest or request to stay. Once the Ikran were ready, Uleyte had come to greet you and wish you a safe journey, much like the whole village.

Your friend took you aside before you left, taking you away from where the elders and clan were wishing a safe journey under Eywa’s protection.

"Are you all right? Are you ready?" she asked, caressing your face with kindness, noticing your little hidden expression of sadness.

"No and no, I don’t want to see him but I can’t avoid him either. I have a plan, I’m going to be the mature person who doesn’t suffer for him anymore." Your voice was pretty convincing, even though your heart knew perfectly well that it would screw up all your plans.

"Are you sure? I already have some things packed, I’m ready to get on Yìmkxa and follow you. You still have time to ask me" The girl’s words made you laugh and hugged her.

"Don’t worry, I’ll be fine." You answered and then you saw Uleyte take your face and put her forehead on yours. " Really, I’ll be fine," you whispered and smiled.

"May Eywa protect you, I will pray for you. If that Sully makes you suffer, I swear to you, I’ll learn to ride an Ikran and I’ll smack his ass." she said dramatically, only to smile and look you in the eye, leaving on your hand a band woven with the colors of the clan and small green leaves.

"Thank you…" you said with a thread of voice, then hugged her again, holding her with affection and holding the jewel. Feeling a gust of wind wrapped around your back, smiling gently, thinking that that was Ney'nari joining the embrace, just like when you were younger.

You broke away from the hug, when your mother called you from her Ikran, making you sigh before saying goodbye to your friend and return to your ikran. You put on the sash before you climbed on Yìmkxa and followed your parents in flight, noticing at the end Tul'pey watching you from afar, then turning around and going. Yet another sigh came out of your mouth as you walked with your family to the clan that had now become your worst nightmare, even though you would have liked to see Tuk, Kiri and even Lo'ak again, even though he looked like a total idiot.

The hours in flight passed faster than you thought and you watched your clan get further and further away, welcoming the land of the Omatikaya with wonder, noticing how the forest was enchanting, totally different from how you could admire it from the coastal area. Your family landed on the Omatikaya ground when the eclipse was already disappearing into the sky leaving room for the night, immediately noticing how the main village was welcoming you with much warmth.

You felt uncomfortable to see all those Na'vi who greeted you holding their hands to their foreheads and then pointing at you, returning the gesture immediately after your parents, looking at the people in front of you who opened the way for you to pass. You noticed how your mother’s pace accelerated when she saw Neytiri coming at her, hugging her with affection, while Jake formally greeted your family. Next to them you saw Kiri, Lo'ak and Tuk, but not Neteyam, you didn’t know whether to be happy or not, but a small gap in your heart made itself felt.

Tuktirey was the first to greet you, hugging you affectionately, emulating your mothers, this made you smile as you returned the little girl’s embrace.

"Have you grown taller these past few months? Soon you will reach me" you said playfully, making her laugh as you ruffled the pigtails in her head, while Kiri simply greeted you formally as Lo'ak. In the glances of the two older brothers you could notice some note of displeasure, making you realize that they probably both knew how you were emotionally.

"And you’ve become even more beautiful! Even your clothes are so beautiful!" Tuk’s voice made you smile again, she was really a sweet and kind girl, who did not miss the opportunity to give voice to her innocent and sincere thoughts.

The three young Sullys helped your family settle in one of the empty tree houses, very different from your clan’s wooden huts. You thanked the three brothers and for a few hours you spoke, while they took you out of the house to be eaten throughout the clan as was tradition. You would lie in saying that you had not sought Neteyam’s eyes among people or his perfume, but in this case you did not find them, his person around you seemed so absent.

"He can’t get out of the hut, it’s a tradition that the future Olo'eyktan stays alone in the Tsahik's hut" Lo'ak whispered to you, noticing that you were looking for something with your eyes. You were already fighting back. "I know you were looking for him, don’t pretend" he continued, making you sigh heavily before eating a steamed teylu.

"I didn’t ask" you snorted while you were eating.

"But you were looking for an answer, I just gave it to you." You turned to him, like you wanted to ask for something else, but you shut up before talking, knowing there was no point in raising your hopes.

"Thank you, but I didn’t need it." You whispered and then noticed the look of understanding that Lo'ak turned to you.

Lo'ak and Kiri could see from your eyes the same feeling of despondency that Neteyam had in these months without you. They knew that you both wanted each other and also understood your duties as future leaders of your respective clans, what they did not understand was why your parents did not come against you or why they seemed so blind to your unhappiness. When Jake announced the impending mating between Neteyam and Reyin'al, the Sullys' older brother had been desperate to have more time, he wanted to keep his promise to you, returning to you after some time, apologizing. The only one to understand it immediately was Neytiri who tried to convince her husband to give him more time. Neteyam had spent the days before her forced mating praying and meditating, looking for Eywa to beg her to take you back to him, if only to make you feel his apology.

After a few minutes of talking to Kiri and Lo'ak, an elderly Na'vi approached you, making herself known as "grandmother" thanks to Tuk who had greeted her. She asked you to follow her and you nodded, moving from the ground to follow her to an open house, where on the ground there was a young Na'vi that you recognized for the smell.

You rolled your eyes and noticed that Na'vi was Reyin'al. The old woman sat you next to her and looked at you. "Y/n te Skxumew Ikeyni'ite, as the last earthly guide of the future Olo'eyktan you are called to speak with the Tsakarem Reyin'al te Sxeke Ninat'ite, to guide her spiritually and mentally towards the great rite"The old Tsahìk, Mo'at, dismissed without too much ceremony, closing the curtain behind her. Your heart stopped beating as your lungs threatened to let you choke.

"There is nothing I can say about Neteyam more than one of his brothers can." You said after collecting as much air and security to look strong.

"You’ve been with my mate for over a month, you can tell me something more about him." Her sour voice made you doubt that she was the daughter of the singer of the Omatikaya clan.

"Is an exceptional Na'vi. He excels at everything he does, but I think you know that better than I do, because you grew up with him" Your tone became just as acidic, while a sharp tension was created in the air. She looked at you thinning her eyes, just like Pandora’s predators did before attacking their prey.

"These are things I already know, my mate is great at everything. He also told me about his lessons… with you." Reyin'al spit out the last part with poison, as if the thought of Neteyam with you burned in her mouth.

She had noticed how Neteyam spoke of you, describing you as exceptional, an excellent guide, a kind friend and admirable Leader, she had never heard him say a bad word about you. She smelled the situation, but she knew that Na'vi men were having fun with many women before mating through Tsaheylu with one woman.

He still remembered that 'Ma Tanhì' said when you asked Neteyam who she was, the way Neteyam seemed to fall apart after seeing you leave, and then run after you despite her trying to hold him back. She hated the moment they left and he wouldn’t stop looking back, or how he had waited for you to return to his hut until the last. She knew that you were something more than a teacher to him, but she could not afford to raise charges against the future Olo'eykte of a clan as powerful as the Tayrangi, best known for their skills in riding the Banshees and hunting.

"Like I said, he’s a Na'vi who excels at everything he does. He was a very good student." Your voice was cold, while you supported his predatory gaze with your indifferent, you did not intimidate Reyin'al in the slightest and she noticed.

"Then it is a good thing that he chose wisely to anticipate the rite of Tsaheylu with me. It was months away, but after he came home two months ago, he decided to cut it short. I guess I should thank you." Her words stabbed you in the chest without even expecting it. It was difficult for you to keep your face as indifferent as possible, because inside you a new piece of your soul was torn.

"There’s nothing to thank. I didn’t do anything." Reyin'al smiled at you with disdain before answering you.

"But you have done a lot. Don’t think I don’t know." At these words you looked at her, feeling the bitterness in your throat, as if it were poison.

"What would you know?" You asked, as your eyes tapered like hers, the only difference being that your eyes were more endearing, and she reassembled.

"That surely in your clan he will have fun with some woman, it is normal for Omatikaya men to have moments of leisure away from home." Her tone was mean, just like her eyes. "Of course I gave him permission for all this, you know how the guys are, but then he came back to me. He was so happy to come home, come back in my arms. He could no longer stay away from me" you looked at her with indifference, as you derealized what she was saying. "After all, I am his mate, I’ll be the one to bind myself to him and his soul tomorrow. For this, I thank you. You guided my soulmate wisely."

You took a deep breath before nodding, accepting her thanks, knowing there was something unsaid. "I only did my duty." You hissed

"You are too modest. You guided my soulmate on the right path, he returned home healthy and stronger. It’s no small feat, though I’m sure he’s had his affairs with some skank. You know, Neteyam had always been in love with me and he suffered so much from my lack that the first day when he came home we…you know. He was so passionate and engaging" his tone getting increasingly mean to you, you knew she was doing it on purpose. But the thought of Neteyam doing the same thing to you hurt so much. " He also started calling me 'Tanhi', He says I shine like a star, that’s why he calls me so. It’s something he said when we were kids, I’m so glad he remembered."

The heart fell into your stomach, being dissolved in the acids that were contained in that place. Neteyam called that woman what he called you, it hurt you, your bleeding wounds now seemed to result in hemorrhage. "I’m glad." you hissed before you got up from the tappet to get away from her.

"Don’t you wish me a safe path with my soulmate Neteyam? it is tradition." She smiled mean while watching you get up from the ground. Reyin'al waited for the blessing, noticing how your eyes revealed a veil of pain you were trying to hide. "May Eywa protect your path." You said clenched teeth, noticed her proud smile and winning posture before heading out of the hut.

You took a long, deep breath to hold back what looked like tears of pain, starting to walk to the opposite point from which you had arrived. You hated how you were feeling, you knew that maybe it was a lie, but there was that worm in your head that told you it wasn’t a lie. Why did she have to lie? Surely Neteyam did not tell her that they had had intimate moments, so why not believe her? But at the same time your heart screamed that you had to believe in him

Your heart hurt again, as if small needles were slowly puncturing it, causing you to feel pain, but you could not scream from the pain due to large throat knots. Unknowingly you found yourself in front of a closed hut but that had an unquestionable perfume, he was there.

You would have liked to see him, but at the same time you preferred not to. After two months you felt so close to him and the only thing you could do was lay your hand on the tent for a few seconds, along with your forehead, poisoning yourself with his sweet scent that was better than you remembered. You would have wanted to come in and look at his eyes as you convinced yourself that he was nobody, but your heart was beating so hard feeling his heart close again. You sighed once again before turning around and leaving, not knowing that Neteyam had felt youe presence too, but when he got up to open the tent it was too late to see you, so he thought it was just another joke of his mind.

It hurt, everything in you hurt, but in those few seconds that his perfume collided against your nose, it made you feel at home and calm. You were wondering if he really lied to you, all those promises, kisses, intimate moments, was it really all just fun?

You tried to buy yourself back, you couldn’t afford to collapse again, not in a place where everyone knew you like the next Tayrangi Olo'eykte, you would have been weak. And that’s how you swallowed your feelings, pulling the moments with Neteyam out of your mind and torturing yourself with Reyin'al’s words, it was good to know now, it would have been enough to convince you of the woman’s words and your heart would not have made a beat thinking of that boy who was not yours.

It took you some time before you found the right road to the house where you were staying with your parents, and when you found it you rushed in with the intention of going to sleep. Your mother told you a few things, but you ignored her words to keep your mind empty, nodding as if you were consenting to everything she said, then taking your things and going to sleep in those strange capsules that were the clan’s bed.

You prayed to Eywa to take away the pain, to strengthen you for the next day, and to protect your heart if you saw Neteyam, so as not to fall for him again. You closed your eyes, unknowingly seeking comfort in the necklace around your neck, forgetting that some threads are twisted belonged to Neteyam, feeling strangely better before falling asleep.

The day greeted you in a way too tortuous for you, the air was so intrinsic of happiness around you, hearing some Na'vi preparing the village for the big event. You could understand their joy, after all the eldest son of Olo'eyktan was going to take his place, and lead the clan in a new era of prosperity and peace under the gentle hand of the Great Mother.

You opened your eyes, cursing yourself for waking up one more time, hoping that for some strange reason the capsule would fall, but unfortunately for you it wasn’t.

You climbed to the platform where there were already many Na'vi coming and going with some decorative objects or delicacies for the banquet that would take place immediately after the main event. Formal and ceremonial clothes adorned the slender bodies of the tribe, and guests from other clans, reminding you that you too should have prepared to honor the new couple who would be your clan’s ally, but there was no joy in your heart, only bitterness and sadness. These feelings increased when you noticed Reyin'al coming out of Ninat’s tent, dressed in a charming manner that almost looked like Eywa's daughter. The long black braids were adorned with jewels typical of the Omatikaya, with some feathers that you recognized as those of Neteyam and his family, her face was radiant and bold as she walked through the village to return to her tent, drawing everyone’s attention and eyes on her. You envied her then.

Lucky for you your mother Ikeyni found you with a speed and ease that reminded you why she was recognized as a great hunter and observer, she took you from her arm and then dragged you to the house where you were staying, to get ready. She wasted no time and arranged your braids, picking them up slightly and putting some items representing the Tayrangi clan before sending you to change with your dissent.

"Mother, the ceremony will begin later. Don’t rush me, nobody’s waiting for me" You snorted while wearing ceremonial clothes that strangely were so complicated and full of draperies. They remembered the nets your clan used to fish, while the loincloth cloth was draped in such a way as to simulate the waves, but thanks to the light breeze it seemed to emulate something vaguely like the wind.

"Ma 'ite, of course they are waiting for you. I told you about it yesterday, Mo'at asked that the teacher of Neteyam prepare him with tribal painting as a last step lesson, from student to Olo'eyktan. You said 'yes', so they are waiting for you now" Hearing your mother’s words you opened your eyes wide and walked out of the corner where you were changing.

"Me what? No. Why me? II have not accepted anything. And then, even dad taught and trained Neteyam, why does he not do it?" Your voice revealed a slight panic and exasperation. You couldn’t believe the one time you didn’t listen to your mother, she asked you to do this. It felt like Eywa was starting to play with you again, or your sister was trying to help you again, and at that moment you remembered the speech he gave to her two months earlier.

"Because I asked you, if you had told me 'no', I would have asked Tsentey. But you said yes, and I told Mo'at and the Sully family" She said, and then she smiled at you in those clothes. "You already look like the Olo'eykte Tayrangi. Today will be your time to be the face of the clan" Her sweet voice made you breathe heavily.

You didn’t feel like making a fuss and going against your own word, if you had retreated back, your word would never have been taken seriously by anyone. You looked at your mother’s eyes, full of pride as she saw you wearing those clothes that fully represented your clan and your status.

"Your sister sewed this dress a long time ago, she said she would give it to you on the day of your social debut as the future Tsahik, as she said that you would be the spiritual voice of the clan…now you wear it to represent the Tayrangi as the future Olo'eykte and Tsakarem" as if the memory of Ney'nari were hurting her, in fact she never spoke of her.

"Me? Tsahik? I was so rebellious and unmanageable, how could she think I would be a good spiritual guide?" You said laughing bitterly at the memory. Ironic how even your clothes reminded you of your sister, it seemed like she was doing everything to remind you of that Tsaheylu argument.

"You were, but she said that your soul was deeply connected to Eywa, even if you didn’t participate in the rites, you ran into the forest or the sea and connected to the native animals. She convinced me that you would become a great Tsahik, but look at you here… My little girl will be Olo'eykte" She caressed your face gently, and glimpsed in your eyes a bit of the spiritual essence of Ney'nari, making her smile. "Now go, you’re already late and I still have to get ready." she said before she left you. You knew she was about to cry over Ney'nari’s memories and you left her alone, knowing she didn’t like to be seen in moments of fragility like that.

The dress felt like it was giving you warmth and strength, so you thought your request last night had been answered this way, 'a protection for the heart if I had seen Neteyam'. Now you were going to see it and you were squeezing into those fabrics that let you wear your sister’s warm embrace.

When you arrived at the Sullys' house, Neytiri greeted you with a kind hug, and then formally greeted you. She was charming, her clothes worthy of a Tsakarem, colorful and refined, while her body presented some paint marks that recalled the colors of the Omatikaya clan.

"Ma yawntutsyìp, you are wonderful. It seems that you have already taken your mother’s place" Neytiri’s gentle hands caressed your face, touch and sweet and warm.

"You are wonderful too, ma Tsakarem," you laughed slightly, noticing how her gaze fell on yours, reminding you that she wanted to be called by her name. "Ma Neytiri" this time she smiled, then called Tuktirey.

The little girl showed up with a deep bowl that contained white paint, mother and daughter accompanied you to Neteyam who was a bundle of nerves inside his tent. He stood with his back as his hands leaned on what appeared to be a table or shelf with some clothes on it that he should wear. Your hands trembled, just to see him from behind was taking your breath away

"Ma'itan, it’s time to get ready…" Neytiri politely said, as she had Tuk put the bowl on one of the furniture that were there, and then sent her to Jake to get ready. Neteyam turned around, ready to respond negatively to his mother, but remained silent when he saw you, enchanted.

Time seemed to slow, and your looks met, remaining enchanted by each other, it seemed like a lifetime ago since you saw those eyes for the last time. His eyes held a veil of sadness but there was something that made you realize that he was happy to see you but also sorry for something. Neytiri smiled as you reacted in that way, then quietly disappeared, leaving you two alone.

A thrill of excitement passed through your body. Your heart was beating faster and faster, as the butterflies in your stomach took flight creating a strange dance. You had the feeling that everything around you was fading, focusing only on him. As if the rest of Pandora is dissolving, leaving you two alone in an aura of magic and old promises.

The words got lost in your throat as you tried to breathe, to remember how to move and walk. Your senses are sharp, every detail of his face, his way of looking at you and moving seemed to have been eternally etched in your memory. His presence resonates within you, a sweet melody that makes every fiber of your being vibrate.

Your legs trembled as you approached him slowly, then carried a hand on your forehead and pointed out to greet him formally; the words intertwined in your mind as you tried to follow the plan you had studied so as not to fall back into his sweet trap.

"Sit down…" you whispered as you took the bowl that Tuk had left. Neteyam sat down and looked at you with so much adoration and nostalgia that for a second you almost thought that everything was back to the way it was. You felt a sense of déjà-vu as you sat in front of him, reminding you of the first time they had forced you to draw on his body for that distant holiday.

"You’re gorgeous…" Neteyam whispered in love, voicing his thoughts, watching you shuffle the paint inside the bowl with your fingers. At that moment all your defenses were dissolved, leaving room for a sense of vulnerability that overwhelmed you brutally. You felt like he opened a door in your heart, allowing all emotions to flow without restriction.

"Your partner is gorgeous." Your tone was slightly sad as you took the paint to begin the tribal blessing designs. The chemistry between you was palpable, and the mere encounter of looks seems to encompass a universe of meanings, which led you to look away from his cursed eyes.

"It doesn’t matter… It’s not her I’m looking at" he said without looking away from your face, while you drew the first line on his chest, feeling your fingers burning on him. At his words, you raised your eyes to meet his, for a moment you thought that nothing had changed and that you were still the same people who until a few months ago were kissing secretly in a shed, exchanging promises and talking about the future.

"You’ll see her soon, she’s very beautiful today, I saw her…" Your voice was nostalgic, you missed him so much. But talking about her was like eating a great dish, knowing it’d been poisoned.

"How are you?" he asked gently, changing the subject. His tone of voice was also evident in his nostalgia. He thought he was dreaming and that this was just a beautiful dream, shuddering at every touch accompanied by paint.

"Well, I'm fine… I’m preparing to become Olo'eykte and Tsahik… I’ll mate with Tul pey in four moons…" Your fingers did not stop working lines on his chest and shoulders, noticing with the corner of your eye his sad expression.

"Four moons…" he whispered, with disbelief and sadness "I-I’m glad you’re fine, ma Tanhi," you raised your face to hear that nickname you missed so much. Your eyes moved from his lips to his eyes, feeling that urge to kiss him and feel him again as yours.

"what about you? How are you?" Your voice was dying in your throat, you were kind of hoping he was sick today, just because he was gonna mate with Reyin'al.

"Nervous, I never thought I’d be here, on a day like this, to mate a woman I don’t feel like my own" he laughed nervously. "…It’s just… weird, that’s all."

You smiled softly at him, albeit with a slight tone of sadness, understanding where he was going. Your eyes passed through his entire body, following your fingers that traced lines and points on his torso and neck.

"Everything will be all right, the Great Mother looks up at you and protects you, ma 'Teyam" his face came up to yours and you felt his heart pounding wildly. Neteyam’s heart was beating faster and faster, He missed you so much, and he missed hearing you call him that.

"I would like the Great Mother to watch over me to follow this path with another woman." He sighed as his eyes pointed to your lips, "You… you don’t know how much I wanted to tell you before… That I’m sorry, for everything, Ma Tanhi. I-I swear. I should have told you about her, I was an skxawng"

A wave of heat enveloped you at those words, as your stomach filled with frantic butterflies dancing in a disorganized manner. Every breath became deeper and more difficult, as if just looking at him left you breathless. Your cheeks faded with a slight blush, while your thoughts falter between enthusiasm and uncertainty. A sweet and sudden feeling of lightness pervaded you, as if the chains of worry were melting.

The look you exchanged was full of contrasting emotions: passion and desire are intertwined with nostalgia and sadness of lost time. The air charged with an electrical voltage, a palpable energy that enveloped both of us after all that time. You could feel the presence of each other, the heat emanating from your bodies, as if there was an irresistible call that united you two. Your eyes attract like magnets, you peer each other, looking for clues and signs that confirm that everything you have shared in the past can still exist.

Each line of your faces bears the marks of the experiences you had experienced, but the sparks in your eyes reveal that the feelings you felt were still alive and present. The romantic tension and the weight of time spent were felt. Doubts and fears crept into your heart, like a cold wind caressing the flames. Old pains and past disappointments are scars that cannot be ignored. And so, in the midst of this dance of desire, you stood there, staring at his lips intensely, breathing suspended, while he did the same.

"I have to finish…" You said to then lay clean fingers on his chest, making him sit normally, while you continued to create drawings.

He looked at you enchanted, hoping that you understood how much he still craved you, not only carnally, he wanted all of you.

Your fingers began to draw lines and curves on his face, trying to resist the temptation to still taste his lips, and it was difficult because of his strong and sweet scent, but also because of the way his eyes burned with love on you.

The fear of suffering again, of putting at risk what was rebuilt after the separation, holds back your deepest instincts, you couldn’t give in right now.

"I missed you, ma Tanhi. Every night, every day, I missed you so much." He whispered, noticing the little distance between you, the tension became heavier and harder for both of you.

"Neteyam… you are going to make Tsaheylu with Reyin'al…" your fingers passed over his lips, making the last lines of the tribal blessing design.

"I don’t want Reyin'al" he said, brushing your fingers with his hand, smearing himself with paint while he couldn’t look away from you.

Before you could answer, Mo'at entered the room, and you instinctively walked away not to raise any suspicions.

"ma parultysip, are you finished?" asked old Tsakik, looking at you, and then smiling when you nodded.

"Yes, ma Tsahik." You stood up from the ground without looking at Neteyam, as you approached Tsahik to greet her formally. The woman puts a hand on your shoulder and dismisses you. For a second, before you left, you turned and your eyes met those of Neteyam who did not miss a single movement of yours.

A whirlwind of emotions erupted within you as memories of past love re-emerge in your mind. A mixture of happiness, excitement, and fear spreads through your body, making it difficult to control the visceral reactions that overwhelmed you. You sighed thinking how stupid you were, it was so clear you wanted him and you didn’t know if Neteyam really wanted you or was just playing.

Acquitted in your thoughts you clashed with Kiri, who held you from your arms to keep you from falling. "Hey. Y/n, but where’s your mind?" she asked, looking at you, checking if you were okay.

"Oh, I’m sorry, I’m just distracted." You said you’d pull yourself together and look at the girls in front of you.

"The ceremony starts soon, I know you don’t want to… but we have to go, it’s the other way. Follow me" Kiri took your hand and led you to the opposite side of the village, meeting again Neteyam who was to go with Mo'at from the opposite side to yours, he was dressed in traditional clothes that the Olo'eyktan wore before being recognized as such. You passed by, but your hands searched silently, stretching some fingers, as if they were attracted by a magnetic force, barely touched each other. You two felt the contact, light but full of meaning, that triggers electric shocks along the skin. It is as if an inner fire is burning within you, fueled by the memories of the past and the awareness that this moment could be the beginning of something new. And then let you go, you drag by Kiri and him to his grandmother.

When you arrived at the sacred place where all the clan and guests had already gathered, you sat in the second row, along with Kiri and Lo'ak, already seeing Reyin'al standing in front of the Tree of Souls. She looked at you defiantly, with the same eyes of those who were winning both the war and the battle, seeing you so close to the tree made her happy, because you would see that Neteyam had chosen her.

When Neteyam reached her you felt a squeeze in your heart and Lo'ak offered you his hand to shake if you needed it, remaining silent and respecting your pain. Every word of the Tsaheylu rite stabbed you in the heart, and with it you shook Lo'ak’s hand ever stronger.

"Oel ngati kameye, ma Neteyam," Reyin'al said as she took her braid very theatrically, glancing at you to make sure you saw it.

Neteyam remained silent for a few seconds, feeling the pressure on him and the look of Jake burning on his skin, hoping that he would do nothing foolish, while Neytiri hoped that her baby would become a man and follow his heart.

Neytiri understood that you and Neteyam had something similar to what she and Jake had had, she understood that since she first saw you together. In fact, she sent Lo'ak instead of Tsutey to check where you and Neteyam ended up that night in the shed.

A mother feels and understands her children even before they understand each other, so in the months when he had returned home, she did everything to help him and encourage him to follow his heart. After all, she was the one who raised her kids by telling them about her love story with Jake Sully.

Neytiri was shaking Jake’s hand while mentally encouraging his first son to make the right choice, and was slightly disappointed when she saw Neteyam take his braid. She was waiting for him to put it back, and then she saw you on the other side. You shook Lo'ak’s hand, grieving, while Kiri gently scratched your back.

Seen from the outside, no one would ever suspect that you were suffering, after all you were rigid and composed, but those little details didn’t escape her.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

Notes II:

This is officially the penultimate chapter, it tears my heart. Anyway, I’m trying not to hate Reyin'al, but I can’t </3

-Mel

(I’m in love with this picture, okay? Okay.)

[raccooncati]

In light of recent Hazbin leaks, and to distract people from them, may I offer you the first chapter of a fanfic I wrote for my sister back in March? It's spoiler free and it's basically a crack fic I wrote for fun.

(Is this self promotion? Maybe. Do I care? Not really. Might as well try to get an audience in, other than my sister.) If you like it, there's a little more on Ao3.

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The Morningstar Motel

Chapter 1: Knock Knock

It’s been a few weeks since the Hazbin Hotel reopened, the whole establishment shining bigger and brighter than ever. The only thing that didn’t appear to have changed was the staff. Of course, that was true, for the most part. Husk was still toiling away behind his bar, while listening to Angel Dust complain about the piece of shit that was Valentino, and Niffty was still at war with the pests around the hotel. Not as many as before, but still prezent nonetheless.

And, even though some people were missing from the picture, life, for the most part, was back to normal. That is, if you ignore the fact that the King of Hell has taken permanent residence at his daughter’s hotel.

Lucifer, while not exactly needing to stay there, still concluded that it was for the betterment of everyone if he moved in. It wasn’t at all because he wanted to make sure a certain someone with a red monocle and an attitude stayed as far away from his precious girl as possible. No sir, certainly not the case here.

Either way, it didn’t matter because, at the end of the day, no one cared who was sitting next to them at the bar. Be it a fallen angel or a porn star, the liquor was still the same. And the bartender's not about to judge whatever happened in Lucifer’s head that prompted him to decide that living with the sinners he formerly disliked was for the best. Not his circus, not his monkeys. Especially now.

“…and then she had the audacity to call me, demanding that I give her Charlie’s number, so they could set up another audience. Like that’s gonna happen. Not on my watch!” Lucifer continued ranting about his discussion with the High Seraphim that he had that morning, all while Husk kept pouring him glass after glass of some sugary concoction that only the Morningstars appeared to be able to ingest. Honestly, that thing had to be the reason diabetes was a thing in Hell too.

Angel chimed in, apparently really interested in what the King was saying. “If this goes like last time, we might as well tear down this joint ourselves. Just to cover our bases.”

“That’s not a bad idea.”

“I know, I’m a genius.” Angel took the glass Husk offered him, taking a sip before continuing. “In all seriousness, Your Majesty, is it really that bad they wanna talk? I mean, Heaven never reached out to us before. That has to count for something, right?”

Lucifer sighed. “I suppose so. And, whether I like it or not, this is what Charlie wants. A chance to convince those stuck up holier-than-thou idiots to listen.”

Husk took this moment to join the conversation. “So you’re giving the seraph Princess’ phone number?”

Taking a gulp from his drink, Lucifer turned to the bartender. “Oh, it’s a done deal.” He swirls his drink as he talks. “Although, I did warn Sera that Charlie is busy today, so don’t bother.”

Angel snorts. “Yeah, busy going on dates.” Which was true, Charlie and Vaggie were out for the whole day. The girls were itching to go on a proper date, the first one in months, and their friends and family assured them that the hotel will still be standing by the time they return.

While the two demons and an angel were having their conversation, Alastor watched from the shadows. The Radio Demon was in no way going to interact with that group, it wasn’t in his itinerary for today. And neither was the knocking coming from the front door. Honestly, how was he the only person hearing it? It was quite loud.

Never mind that. He was the host of the hotel, so he might as well do his job and open the door, let the new guests in.

Approaching the entrance, Alastor swung the door open, his perpetual smile accompanying his already rehearsed speech. “Well hello you pitiful sinner! Welcome to the Hazbin Ho–“ The face greeting him on the other side was definitely not someone he wished to see. The word slurred out of his mouth “–Oooo…”, then he abruptly slammed the door in the guest’s face, blocking it with his whole body, to make sure it stays closed. That perpetual smile Alastor was known for dissapeared, it’s place taken by a terrified expression.

That didn’t go unnoticed by the group at the bar. Angel Dust is the first to see Alastor in his sorry state. His eyes widened as he took in the scene. Then he tapped Husk and Lucifer on their shoulders. “Guys, look.”

The King of Hell Is the first to comment on it. “Guess the world is ending again.”

Husk, while more familiar with Alador than most, is taken by surprise by the complete disappearance of the Radio Demon’s iconic grin. “That’s certainly new. What the fuck do you think he saw outside?”

Angel took a second to think of an answer, eyes still on the petrified sinner across the room. “Maybe Hell froze over. That’d be funny.”

Husk snorted, while Lucifer added “If it’s snowing outside, I’m going home to get my sled.”

The porn star speared the fallen angel a perplexed expression. “Why do you have a sled? In Hell?”

“Oh, well, you see, there is this ski resort that Lily and I used to take Charlie to in–“

“–I don’t really care right now. What I do care about is what’s hiding behind door number three.” The demon said, pointing at the Overlord.

Finally deciding that he’d rather deal with all of this at a later date, Alastor disappears in a clump of shadows, leaving the person who has ruined his day be someone else’s problem.

And, oh boy, how Lucifer wished he could do the same. But, unfortunately for him, he now has to deal with the mess left behind by the deer. Some things never change.

Downing the last of his drink, the King approached the entrance of the hotel, bracing himself before opening the door. What greeted him on the other side wasn't a blizzard, or another Exorcist army, but his wife. His estranged wife that he hasn’t seen in literal years.

“Hello, Lucifer. May I come in?”

Yup, definitely wished he could trade places with Alastor right now.

——————

This first chapter was inspired by a fanart that had no business being as funny as it was. @_deetea_ on Twitter and Instagram

[platinumrosetail]

Soo could I request a flash sentry (Equestria girls) x male reader.

With a enemies to lovers troupe?

So both of them have a crush on twilight and they start developing crushes on each other after a while? (Feel free to genderbend twilight if that makes you more comfortable)

And both of them just deny their crushes on each other, and everyone is just convinced they're dating or like each other?

For m! readers personality I'm thinking he could be kinda rude and a tsundere, but he also can be kinda Flirty but if someone he likes flirts with him he gets really flustered?

I'm thinking he also maybe is a drummer OR he skateboards?

(Sorry if this is really long)

Interesting! I’ve honestly been hoping for a mlp request for some time now as there sadly isn’t a whole lot of male mlp x reader so thank you for requesting 😁, also yea I’ll be genderbending twilight so it’s comfortable for me.

Warning: noob author, male reader, and others.

Character: flash sentry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You and flash have a bit of a rivalry what with you two having a crush on dusk shine (genderbent twilights name).

You friends (which is the main 5 just genderbent to male hope you don’t mind I make them his friends thought it would make sense) all think that you and flash both have a crush on each other which you whole heartedly denied and said that you would never get a crush on him…… oh how that will change soon.

When dusk shine returned to his world after defeating flash’s ex boyfriend(would have left sunset a girl but considering how I already genderbend the main 6 might as well y’know?) you and flash start to hang out even flirt with each other whether it was on purpose or not the both of you didn’t know as it just naturally happened.

That made everyone think that you two finally started dating as they could tell there was tension before.

You denied it though, so much so that you said that it isn’t like you have a crush on him and lay away at night thinking about him…… it was true… until it wasn’t as apparently you had jinxed yourself that night thinking about flash.

(Please get the reference lol if not then it’ll be in the a/n at the bottom.)

You didn’t really know what to do with this predicament you’re in so you try to deny it and act normal but whenever he flirts back you get flustered and start stuttering before making a excuse so you can leave to cool off your face from the blushing as you didn’t know if he even liked you like that or just trying to get along with you from now on after dusk shine left.

It was by a sudden accident that you found out that flash does in fact have the same feelings for you, you were skateboarding and accidentally rammed into him and took too long to get off of him and he let out the ‘I love you’ as he looked into your eyes, both of you blushed before getting up, you tried stammering out a response before sighing and giving up and just kissing him saying you love him to while also adding dork at the end.

(A/n: hope y’all liked it!! The reference was from gravity falls by the way, I think y’all know what I’m talking about. I hope I did a ok job making the reader a tsundere as possible as I could, I tried my best with it so I’m sorry if it isn’t as good as yall hoped it would be 😅. Also my first male mlp request yay! This was honestly unexpected for me to get a request on it 😁 anyway hope y’all have a wonderful day/evening/night!!)

[naychuchu]

🐈‍⬛

tw: this is my first time actually posting anything i’ve written. i made these pretty late at night so i’m sorry if they’re bad i just wanted to write something. probably some spelling mistakes and stuff i didn’t feel like checking it throughly.

a/n: please be nice

personal

* i’ve mentioned this before but baji absolutely LOVES the yakuza game

* favorite one is yakuza 0 (definitely not because this is the only one i’ve watched so far🌚)

* john cena fanboy for absolutely no reason. has his theme as his ringtone

* number 1 baby metal fan. owns their merch and goes to every concert

* his favorite season is summer for obvious reasons but his favorite holiday is definitely christmas because he and mikey ride around with shin

* HATES horror movies. like nothing can convince this man to watch them. even the kiddie ones like goosebumps or scary stories to tell in the dark will have him act like the devil just touched his soul

* definitely the kind of guy to walk around with one lens in his glasses after a fight

* purposely named his bike cockroach knowing pah is afraid of them

* he used to hate his fangs when he was little because kids used to tease him and say he was a dog

* that was until he started saying he’d bite and give them rabies if they kept messing with him

* cannot grow facial hair to save his life

* judges people on how they interact with animals, specifically cats

* despite popular belief, i don’t think he would get any tattoos. he seems like a piercing guy and definitely cannot sit that long for a tattoo

* gave himself the alias edward because he used to watch twilight with his mom

* he even had a phase when he acted like a vampire but will vehemently deny and threaten anyone who dares to bring it up

* is lactose intolerant and just like many of us will eat dairy and instantly regret it as soon as it hits his stomach

* sometimes he feels insecure about the fact he was held back, all of his friends moving up while he’s left behind

* even though he has a reputation for committing arson and slightly unprovoked violence, keisuke is truly a model citizen☝🏽

* volunteers at shelters, helps the elderly, feeds the homeless, solves climate change. he truly is a saint and can do no wrong!

home life

* i like the idea that his mom was a teen mom and that his father was never really around and just stopped coming one day

* due to her job, his mom sometimes works really late or super early so over the years he’s learned to cook (the only good thing he can cook is yakisoba)

* on the nights he knows his mom will be back late he cooks her food and despite it not being the best she still loves it

* even though she works a lot the two of them are still very close and their favorite thing to do is read manga and watch mystery dramas whenever she’s off

* despite not knowing his dad(he only visited when he was a baby) he never felt insecure about it

* he’s a total mamas boy, and will fight anyone who says something about her

* when ryoko was younger, she wanted to have a lot of kids but after having keisuke she changed her mind. she felt it would be selfish to have so many kids when she works so much and after realizing how much of a handful he can be.

* despite that and having him at such a young age, keisuke was the best thing to ever happen to her and wouldn’t trade him or his wildness for the world.

relationship

* back on the yakuza point, whenever you’re sad he’ll grab a hair brush, turn up the radio and start singing 24-hour cinderella to you until his voice is gone

* when you guys get in a fight he’ll act like he’s in a 2000’s r&b mv and start singing bakamitai. chifuyu gets the hose to spray water above him, kazutora plays the music, and ryusei records the whole thing so baji can send it to you

* a biter, like what’s the point of him having those sharp ass teeth if he don’t try to take a chunk out of you

* whatever your favorite animal is, he’s gonna buy every single book about them so he can share little facts about it with you

* if you’re into a specific artist or group, he’ll listen to their whole discography and learn everything in the fandom

* becomes a horanghae enthusiast and will force you to be one as well

* just like he’s loyal to his friends and toman, he’s loyal to you

* like foreva togetha foreva LOCKED IN 🤞🏽

* a girl tries flirting with him and all of a sudden he’s hellen keller

* the type of boyfriend to say you’re too spoiled whoever you ask for something while doing said thing you requested

* will literally lift his ass off the seat while you’re sitting next to him and fart on you then blame it on you

* talm bout some ‘ew the hell did you eat’ like his diet doesn’t consist of yakisoba, monster energy drinks, and beef glizzies

* speaking of farts😸 keisuke will send pics of his shit to you asking if it looks normal

* will make fun of you if you’re lactose intolerant as if he don’t be upside down on the toilet fighting for his life

* is constantly in your personal space. like he’ll be standing behind you while you play like candy crush or best fiends mumbling about moves you can make. sometimes he’ll snatch your phone and play it himself

* what’s yours is his. mid chew on something he wants? he’s opening your mouth and popping it in his, no matter if it’s soggy

* absolutely loves giving and receiving hugs, being in your arms makes him feel safe and gives reassurance that despite all of his flaws you still love him

* stares at you with his mouth open, no matter what you’re doing or how you look his eyes are on you 24/7

* takes the absolute worst pictures of you on facetime and puts each one in his favorites until the end of time

* throws rocks at your window at like 4 in the morning knowing you both have school just so you can ride around with him until the sun comes up

* i feel like he’d totally like mellow down on the things he does. he doesn’t want to worry you while he’s away

* constantly checks up with you so you know he’s okay and not lying on the ground somewhere and dying 🌚

this is so scary bye 😭

[itsjaywalkers]

Hello!hope ur having a good day :) <33

I was wondering if u wanted to share some trans reg hc, could be overall or like the boxing au one, or anything rly.

Like who was the first person he came out to, how/when did he realise, how does he deal with dysphoria- what gives him dysphoria/euphoria, and maybe how would it translate into like relationship and sexlife, would he be able to go ahead without any/much dysphoria, or would he have to have sex a ‘specific way(?? Idk??)’ to make it work?

A lot of question I know, and u don’t have to answer if it makes u uncomfortable or anything, I just wanted to hear more about your headcanons about this.

//a trans guy who is obsessed with trans reg, and ur writing

hi darling!! i have today off so i am . in fact . having a great day <3 i hope yours is treating u kindly too!!

and ofc i want to!! i'm gonna do it boxer au based, since reg's trans experience isn't the same in every story!! and don't worry, i'm happy to answer ur questions!! it doesn't make me uncomfy in the slightest, trans reg is very special to me too for many reasons and i loveeee talking about him <3

the first person he came out to was sirius!! this is my Truth almost always no matter the fic. it changes sometimes, if he takes longer to realise and he and sirius have a complicated relationship but !! in the boxer au they get along great and they're very close, so reg told sirius first!!

sirius already had his suspicions tho, and they had a lot of long deep convos about gender. he helped reg figure himself out and supported him every step of the way

in the boxer au, he realised quite young!! he was never completely comfortable in his own body, but since he was a very awkward and . odd . kid everyone attributed it to reg just not being 'normal' in general. when puberty hit it got worse tho, and even tho everyone told him it'd pass and that puberty wasn't supposed to feel good or fun, reg knew there was something else

sirius also noticed there was something going on with his brother, so he tried to help him in every way he could. he lent him his clothes whenever reg asked (even tho it was always kind of begrudgingly), convinced their parents to allow him to wear his hair short, bought him oversized clothes and called him by his nickname and never his actual name

but i think the moment it actually hit reg was when he got mistaken by a boy one time he got out of school and went to his father's office to wait for him. the receptionist assumed he was sirius, and it finally clicked for him

he didn't tell sirius immediately tho. he researched a lot first, almost obsessively, and he doubted himself all of the time, having these moments in which . he was afraid he was actually somehow making it all up in his mind

reg was very scared of change, and this was a very big One. he knew sirius would support him no matter what, but there's always fear yk?? and there was also the matter of his parents. he was absolutely terrified

but he ended up blurting it out one night he and sirius stayed up late in secret. sirius talked to him about this one boy he was crushing into, and came out to him. and reg came out to him in return!! there were a lot of hugs and a lot of tears (they pretended this never happened the next morning)

sirius was a man on a mission after this. he helped him browse names and started using the correct pronouns, always getting so incredibly upset when he slipped at the beginning. reg found it very endearing, and assured him it was fine bc it was understandably gonna take them both some time

reg didn't have many close friends back then, so he didn't really come out to anyone in school, and he graduated with only sirius knowing the truth

those years were hard ngl, and reg struggled A Lot, but having sirius on his side made the whole thing . slightly more bearable . sometimes not even that was enough but reg appreciated it immensely

how he deals with dysphoria has changed over time!! he relied a lot on the internet when he was younger, and on his brother too, but there was only so much sirius could do apart from offering a willing ear and being comforting, considering he couldn't really understand what reg was going through. it absolutely broke sirius' heart, to see him have breakdown after breakdown, losing his appetite or refusing to leave his room for days

back then reg experienced dysphoria constantly. he wasn't comfortable in his own body and he had a hard time looking at himself in the mirror, or even listening to himself talk

some days he could kind of deal with it, remain functional despite it all. he did his best to keep himself distracted so he wouldn't think too much about the whole thing

but other days getting up from bed was Hard

now tho !! it doesn't happen That often, he's the man he was always meant to be !! he's on T and got top surgery and legally changed his name and gender so he's kind of thriving

he still has his moments tho bc this is something he's gonna have to deal with for the rest of his life so when it happens he goes to the twins!! they're both trans in this story so they Understand what he's going through and they support each other Always

they exchange advice and comfort each other when it gets especially Hard and . idk it's all very lovely, they're each other's ppl yk??

again, back then a lot of stuff gave him dysphoria, but nowadays it's more specific?? little things that usually don't upset him that badly but that sometimes pile up and end up giving him actually bad dysphoria??

like . he's a well-known sports journalist, he isn't really a celebrity or anything but ppl do talk about him sometimes, especially bc of sirius (and then bc of james) and they tend to mention his looks or how similar or different he looks to his brother

and sometimes they use more . feminine adjectives or straight up say he's kinda feminine or even comment on him being trans since it's public knowledge and reg has spoken on it more than once and . it's stuff that doesn't affect him that badly but it still annoys him

it's the same when ppl highlight how passing he looks, how u can't even tell he's trans, etc

there's also the ppl that are purposefully transphobic or misgender him which . does actually make him quite dysphoric, even tho he's mostly very comfortable with his identity + his looks now

he also has a bit of a complicated relationship with . stuff that it's considered 'feminine'

like clothes don't have any gender, same with makeup, and reg wouldn't mind wearing a skirt even tho it's not his style and he does wear some makeup semi-regularly for tv interviews etc etc but . sometimes he feels slightly uncomfy on it, like he gets bad memories or becomes paranoid about how he looks in it, if the clothes make his body seem too . curvy .

as i've said, he's very confident nowadays but he still has his moments!!

when it comes to gender euphoria, it's all about the little things!! people calling him handsome, seeing how hairy his body is now, the fact that he can take his shirt off now when he goes to the beach etc

when it comes to relationships and his sex life he has reached a point in which he can usually go ahead without getting dysphoria but . it depends on his partner really

some ppl can be transphobic without meaning to or simply bc of a lack of knowledge which is fine by him u know he totally gets it, it's a matter of being willing to learn and to listen to him

like . he's used to guys assuming he only bottoms or not even ask if he's comfortable using his front hole u know

or using afab terms to refer to his genitals without making sure first reg is okay with that

which brings me to my next point !! in oby, reg himself uses afab terms and he's fine with james using them too, they've had a convo about it and everything

but it's different for reg in the boxer au!! he does use afab terms for himself, he doesn't mind at this point and it doesn't give him any dysphoria however . when it comes to his sexual partners . he prefers them using words like a cock or hole or more neutral names . it gives him gender euphoria!! and the other stuff makes him kinda uncomfy. it's fine when he's the one saying it or thinking it but hearing it out loud coming from . other people, especially people who are just there bc they're attracted to him and want to fuck him is . Not Great

he also isn't always fine with using his front hole during sex, it depends on his mood and how much he trusts the person he's gonna be sleeping with. besides, he quite likes anal too so !!

this whole thing is another reason why . reg doesn't want to sleep with james bc he feels like he's gonna be a bit of an asshole about it or be another guy who doesn't even bother asking about his preferences or what he's comfy with

which isn't the case at all!! james has been with trans ppl before, and even if he hadn't, he's very considerate with his partners!! and as he should tbh. him being arrogant or knowing he's great in bed doesn't mean he's selfish

[cheemscakecat]

Invincible Spoilers

It actually makes a lot of sense that the Viltrumites latched on to family and changed their worldview because of it.

So for thousands of years, the dominant violent faction that killed the peace-loving Viltrumites sat unchallenged because the old peaceful ways were lost. They believed they were superior to the weaker species around them, and saw them as mere animals. Very few weapons could even hurt them, much less kill.

Under those circumstances, the killing of weak Viltrumites children made a twisted kind of sense. After all, there would always be more Viltrumites having children and the strong would live. They didn’t die often, so in their perspective, children were not such a precious resource as they are to humans.

Someone engineered a virus that could kill them. And it very nearly destroyed the entire species. There were only 50 full-blooded Viltrumites left in the wake of the pandemic.

Like Nolan said, they’re on the brink of extinction.

Nolan wrote books based on his missions to destroy threats to the dying Viltrumites species. He was the guy they sent to deal with threats and see how dangerous they really were.

So he was probably also the first Viltrumite to be tasked with having a hybrid child.

Before the virus, they wouldn’t have had offspring with “lesser beings”, but they couldn’t afford to be so picky with so few in their ranks. So why not send your danger guy to make sure it won’t give you another life threatening disease or result in a deformed child? To see if the rest can follow suit and repopulate with other species.

That’s why they sent him to live with humans, they’re the most compatible species that they could find.

Death shouldn’t be a concern under Viltrumite doctrine. And it wasn’t until the virus. But now that the remaining soldiers have watched their Viltrumite friends and family die, death holds new weight.

Nolan wouldn’t use death as a point to convince Mark if he didn’t somewhat understand the weight of it. And it’s also a point against himself, because he’s arguing out loud with himself at the same time. Why would you fight for Earth and let your people go extinct?

Viltrumite doctrine commands you to kill weak offspring. That’s how things have been done for thousands of years.

But how can a tactical minded-person see the value in doing that?! When the species is nearly extinct and you’ve gone through all the effort of getting attached and trying to raise that child? Old Viltrumite doctrine and the current situation are not compatible.

Nolan is torn between the two ideologies that are telling him how to show loyalty and care. One is telling him that he needs to kill Mark to uphold the holy doctrines of his people. The other is telling him that killing your child is stupid, wasteful, and a disservice to what he’s trying to achieve.

Mark telling him that even if the humans die, they’ll still be together has put more weight on the second, correct ideology. The whole reason you’re even here is to build your species back up and keep it from fading into myth. You care about other Viltrumites. It’s self-sabotaging to destroy the very offspring that you are having to repopulate. And if being half-Viltrumite is enough to make them valuable, shouldn’t the offspring’s life be preserved?

Let’s just get Anissa out of the way first. I’m not defending what she did. She didn’t even want to have kids in the first place, which I think is something the show should expand on. We don’t get to know why, but given the fact they’re meant to have hybrid children, I’m assuming part of it is feeling that the child may be a waste.

It would suck to be pregnant for 9 months only to have something wrong with the baby, especially if in their culture that offspring would be killed at some point. I think she decided to target Mark because he’s already part Viltrumite, and her child would get their powers faster so she could start testing the strength of the child. Wastes less time putting effort into the kid if he or she is not going to grow up Viltrumite material.

The show could also expand on the fact that she has an actual relationship with the father of her second child, and had her of her own volition, not because she was commanded to. It’s implied in the comic, but she needs more development this time around. Anyways, at some point she found actual value in her children, beyond their strength.

Kregg was so down for the cause that he had multiple families at once. And he makes a very good point to Thragg; why shouldn’t we protect our families if we’re repopulating?

He’s got like 10 families, that’s at least 10 Viltrumite kids if everything goes to plan. You really wanna forfeit going from 50 to 60 Viltrumites? Mans just has the natural and sane instinct to protect his loved ones and give his kids the chance to grow up. Thragg doesn’t.

Lucan is one of 50 remaining Viltrumites, and we don’t know the ratio of men to women. But even if there were 25 of each, both genders are a precious resource for repopulating. Should we really be surprised that a man who has had 25 women to choose from at most is unwilling to soil a relationship?

Yes, there’s billions of Earth women, but you don’t go from starving to finding yourself in a supermarket and magically stop being affected by the time you were starving. Kregg stocked up on as many families as possible: Lucan was so used to rationing that he decided to be the best he could to one family, which is still precious even in a sea of options.

Thragg doesn’t understand that. He’s the embodiment of their flawed purging ideology.

Everyone else’s natural nurturing instincts were dormant under the surface, and started sprouting up when they had Earth kids. Thragg’s nurturing instincts are in the Nether for the whole series. He seems dumb because the whole Violent Fascist Viltrumite ideology he lives by is dumb.

It goes against nature and it’s a bad survival strategy. We just get to see it spelled out because the virus has already happened and he isn’t adapting like everyone else. And what’s crazy is that his surviving kids adapted even after all his brainwashing. He could have changed, but he refused and stayed embedded in his ideology his entire life.

I didn’t know where to put Thula, but she’s cool now too. [Cool as in not evil, I mean. She was never lame.]