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popculturebuffet · 2 years ago

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Sam and Max Save the World Retrospective: Culture Shock (Patreon Review for WeirdKev27)

It's time to hit the road you happy people as we've got a hot new retrosepctive courtsey of Kev set to run through next year using his Patreon reviews as I finally play a game i've wanted to play for close to two decades now: Sam and Max Save the World!

For all .. two of you reading this who don't know what Sam and Max is, Sam and Max is a multimedia franchise with a very simple core: A large dog man and his diminutive rabbit sidekick/bestfriend/husband/hired goon go around engaging in ultra violence, shenanignas and what have you to solve assorted cases. This simple framework is an excuse for the two to engage in hilaroius one liners, absurdist slapstick and whatever else can be crammed in. It's likely why the franchise has both endured and has such a sizeable fanbase: You only need the two main characters to make a sam and max story and they can get up to just about anything.

Sam and Max was created by Steve Purcell….'s brother. Yeah his brother Dave made the two as a kid and being a bit of a stinker, Steve made what were basically parodies of them. Eventaully he'd fleshed them out so much and drawn so many full on comics with them beyond just taking a shot at his brother as big brothers tend to do (Mine has called me stalin, what can you do?), Dave gifted him the characters one birthday. Purcell has one heck of a career in video games in animation, having made the first three monkey island games, manic mansion and of course, sam and max hit the road. He's also friends with Mike MIngola of Hellboy fame and X-Men and countless other comics legend and Longshot creator Art Adams.

His biggest legacy though is a franchise I should've visited way sooner but seems like it was made for me: Sam and Max: Starting in comics ala the Tick, while Purcell's creation hasn't had a huge number of works, the quality vastly outstrips the quantity: we have the original comcis which I intend to both read and cover at some point and have this panel so we're already off to a good start

There's a tv series i've seen a decent chunk of that's utterly brilliant and sadly didn't get the 8 seasons it deserved but the one it has is pretty good. It even features a few guest apperances from The RedGreen Show's Patrick McKenna, as Norm THE FRIEND FOR LIFE, who if they make something else sam and max at some point will hopefully come back.

One of the biggest attractions for our heroes though is games. One of their bigger projects was Sam and Max Hit The Road, coming about because Purcell had already made models for the two for some training software for LucasArts and they wanted a full game after how well his previous work had gone out, wanting more ips.

This SHOULD have lead to sequels, but Purcell's first attempt sputtered out for some reason. The second is a bit more troubled, as Lucasarts did not only make a new game but have it almost finished… until Lucasarts pulled the plug. Yeah canning something that's almost finished and could make you money isn't a new phenomina, Warner Bros has simply taken it to new douchey heights.

The fan's reactoin.. was a predictable as it was 100% accurate

This was part of a larger issue as Lucasart was phasing out adventure games, and thus laid off a bunch of it's staff. A bunch of them decided to quit and founded Telltale Games.

The team waited until LucasArts liscene experid as they refused to give it up for no explicable reason, doing csi and texas hold em games, but as soon as it was up Purcell offered it to them immeditly and we were off to the races.

Save the World was also one of the very first games to use an episodic release. Such a release isn't seen often nowadays with companies preferring to do updates or dlc instaed, but at the time it was a brilliant model as downloadbale games were still new, and while there wasn't a gurantee the game would finish (as seen sadly with an attempt to make a game out of Jeff Smith's bone) you still got something and as far as I could tell coudl pay as you went. The model was iffy.. but ended up wildly succeeding as Save the World was a rousing success, making telltale a juggernaut for the next few years. I personally remember, since I co9udln't install the game, playign the back to the future game religously and i'm curious to check out the batman one at some point.

The bottom eventually did fall out due to crunch and other such bullshit, but but thankfully for the current gen of consoles Skunkape games, made up of former telltale employees, was born and so far has mostly focused on remastering those games, wtih a third set for this year. So since i'm long overdue to finally enjoy some ultra violence and adventure gaming with these two, kev bought me the remasters for Save the World and Beyond Time and Space, with plans to get the Devils Playhouse when it comes out to play through and review every month. So with all that possibly needless but still vital expostion out of the way what kind of game did we get? Find out with me under the cut as our heroes deal with some Culture Shock, washed up 70's stars, boxing gloves, and more for episode 1!:

Presentation wise.. this game is majestic as an eagle or that time max caused an international incident by hitting said eagle with a pistrami and crowbar sandwitch to save america from the ghost of william henry harrison. The game looks crisp and the world nicely lived in, even if you'll mainly juts be going between the duo's delapadated office, their friend Sybil's psycharcy office or whatever it is this week and Bosco's Inconveince for cheese and assault rifles. The music is simple but nicely fits.

The voice acting is excellent despite being filled with actors i'd never heard of, mostly working in the adventure game genre. The Cast does a PHENOMINAL job. David Nowlin does a terrific job of Sam getting his deadpan down just perfect while Andrew Chakin does a great job as max though he's replaced by a questoin mark for the rest of the series. The two play off each other perfectly, as they should and the rest of the cast isn't too shabby either with Oggie Banks and Amy Provenzero doing a great job as Bosco, the team's suplier, conspiracy theorist and Sam's surrogate father, and Cybil, a woman who changes careers more than her hair and serves as a friend and ally of the duo in the telltale games. The result is a game that has the lively energy of a cartoon while oftne lacking it due to the format.

Finally we have the core of any comedy, how funny it is.. and for me at least.. this may be one of the most hilarious things i've ever seen and i'm only on chapter 1. While the angaonitst aren't the best and we'll get to why in a second, it's thorughly compesnated for by our main heroes just unleashing a near nonstop barrage of great lines. IT's to the point I can't remember half of them simply because they come in so fast and there's smuch. Even tv tropes crowning moment of funny page only has a fractoin. It's probably the funniest video game i've ever played and i'm only on part one. If I miss a joke it's not out of malice but more because there's hundreds.

So with all the tehcnical stuff out of the way, we're on to the case itself. Well sorta first we get a very simple but welcome tutorial, mostly because as will become clear this is only my second adventure game. I played the first chapter of telltale batman.. but that's ore like a visual novel with some quicktime events, at least as far as I got. This is a full on classic use crap in your inventory to solve shit gameplay.

I played it on switch and while I admit a point and click like this is probably better played on a pc, ironically despite relying on it to write this very review.. it really can't game. While the Skunkape remasters arne't that intesntive I got this pc entirely because the graphics card was wonky, meaning I can cover 16 bit or so games, and likely other old pc games like Sam and Max Hit The Road, but I have ot be careful going too high up as I need this thing to do my job.

The controls are decent.. it can be frustrating having to wait for sam to be in position to click on something, but it's easy enough to scroll and dosen't slowdown gameplay too much, making it a fine option if you only have a console, especially this port as you can take it with you which granted is a plus for any switch port but given how easy it is to break up gameplay here outside of cut scenes, it's perfect for it , provided you have some headphones as while the game is fine without them, as I learned while you can play the game without sound it's just better with the voice acting.

Okay so now i'm done being a lying liar who lies we can REALLY get to things as the first task sets it up. One of your inventory items is Sam's gun, and to bribe their rat Jimmy Two teeth to give them their phone back, you have to shoot up a closet full of cheese just under jesse james hand to give them holes. It's also where my inexperince set in as I didn't realize part of the point of an adventure game is "Try everything you have in your inventory" so I didn't think the gun was something I coudld use till it came to me.

With that we get our case, Bosco who runs the inconvience store, it's actual name, has had some weirdo delivering free videos to his store and wants you to stop it. Before I do though I find someone comitting some grafitti and since threats of violence don't seem to sway the little middle aged scamp and he just runs if you try to use your gun, you have to do the one thing a policeman hates most.. actually talking to the suspect. Turns out the culprit is Specs, one of the soda poppers, a bunch of child stars on a 70's sitcom who have seen better days, and whose grafftotagging our heroes office as a tribute to his hero, brady culture, star of eye-bo and fellow former child star. Since our heroes can't get rid of him for now, or so I thought, we move on to our case where it turns out it's another Soda Popper, Whizzer.

Not that one, we don't want marvel to sue… no Whizzer is another soda popper and his one character trait is…

Yeah while specs is tolerable, not having much of a personality bu having a decent enough voice the rest of the soda poppers….

Whizzer really is only the gags he can run fast and pee. His voice is annoying, and pee jokes jokes usually take the piss out of a good bit of comedy. They can be gross or just… IT'S PEE LAUGH AT IT, which thankfully Sam and Max falls into more than the former. It's just not funny. And while i'm generally not a fan of pee jokes, you CAN make them work. Observe.

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Now this scene is one long pee joke, one the creators were embarassed by… but actually works. Now in itself the intial bit of Little Cato pissing on the ship to mark territory is just gross.. but the fact Gary somehow thinks this is somehow legally binding, and that Clarence instanlly buys into it and order shis own child to start pissing it up, does… and then it wraps around to comedy gold, pun unintended and now regretted, when it turns into a giant war with every one of these idiots (with Nightfall understandably sitting this stuipdity out) getting into some weird pee war, stopping to hydrate and Ash being delighted she has UTI as a result. It's still gross.. but it's also actually funny just for being so entirely stupid, in character, and well thought out.

We can't stop Whizzer for now.. well okay like Specs we could but my dumb ass hadn't figured out how. We do meet bosco whose a delight, a throughly paranoid man whose set up security, gladly tricks sam into triggering it just to get a laugh, and has a great runner of Sam asking "do you have any" only to get a solid nope. I already love bosco and like Sam wish he was my dad. He has a teargas grenade launcher ofr sale for 10,000 dollary doos.

Before I got to the third popper though I actually tried the Eye-Bo, with our heros thankfully not present for the obvious brainwashing, it instead being jimmy two teeth. This leads our heroes to needing to stop him and cultures minons.

It's here I met the third and final and worst soda popper. Yes Whizzer somehow wasn't the worst. We get Peepers. And just starting at the voice..

It is PURE agony to listen to and given any time I tried a weapon it went to a HIGHER pitch, it's pure excuriation. It's this naisly, whiny pain that just digs into your brain. It makes his eventual compuance satisfying, but given he has the most dialouge out of the main trio, and spends it having tied up Sybil in the closet and claming to be her while sounding like louie anderson's clone whose badly melting and swallowed a bunch of hellium. The actual jokes aren't bad and Sybil herself is great, we'll get to her more in a sec, Peepers is pure pain.

So after failing to cave peepers skull in as he richly deserved, I hit the road as you can drive aorund the city aimlessly and pull people over.. and turns out that was th eproblem as, this being post george floyd, I was trying to be senstive and not abuse my power. But in a spoof like this that also clearly does not see the police kindly… that's EXACTLY what I was supposed to do: shoot the tailights out and then extort the 10,000 dollars. Our heroes grossly weild their power.. but that's always been kind of the joke and intentioal or not nicely parodies the real police. Though as Homer Simpson has warned this can have consequences.

This allowed me to buy the gun which is really just a salad shooter with onions in it. And yes that was a real thing and to my shock still is. you can buy one on amazon. I best know it from these bloom county strips

Bosco's works well enough and with that I can FINALLY take my well deserved vengance out on peepers

And I DIDDDD. I got the little bastard to cry and while we sadly didn't see it on screen, Max clubbed his head in with a boxing glove.. not enough to kill him unfortunatiley but we get some info. As you'd expect I have to take out each of the soda poppers to get a piece of the clue. And after trying for ten solid minutes to figure out what I was supposed to do I consulted a guide. And it showed off two vastly diffrent kinds of condrum in an adventure game.

With Whizzer… the solution was actually well laid out and taught me a valuable lesson in patience and really obeseriving things closely when your stuck with an adventure game puzzle. Bosco had mentioned his security system and left a piece of cheese out you coudln't buy, but if you left with would boxing glove you. Earlier i'd also found out Max using the bathroom made whizzer go. So while I had to look up the solution.. it turned out to be pretty clever: put the cheese in whizzers basket of videos while he's in the bathroom. It was satisfying finding it out and more satisfying watching Bosco's security brain the little bastard. It was a solution that while time consuming I probably woudl've been able to figure out, was cleve rand nicely used every facet of the area

In contrast Specs is frustraingly vauge. Finding a pen I figured out one part, you doodle on his grafiti to move him.. but the solution is frustrating. part of it Is I didn't realize the grafiti was on their building, but even with that i'm stumped as to how I was supposed to figure "drop a bowling ball on him from the office"> It taught me sometimes these things take multiple locations.. but also taught me there's no shame in getting help as while i've heard older adventure games have had some way worse puzzles, some are just that difficult.

This however leads into a chase instead which well made up for my frustration as we get a jazzy tune for the crew that's far better than 2/3 of them deserve as you try to shoot out the wheels of Specs car.

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And now we're finally free of these guys part of why they don't work, as does main villian brady culture..is what their parodying. It's clear this is a parody of the celebrity culture of the early 2000's, where it was common to make a spectacle of former child stars and other celebrties down on their luck. I mean it's not like child stars can't do horrible things in modern day, just ask drake bell, but after so many former child stars have come out with horror stories, Jenatee Mcurdy's abuse under dan schnder in paticular… it's clear that this just isn't funny any more and never should've been. The Soda Poppers aren't really sympathetic, but it's no longer the easy target it was and thus while the chapter still has merit the main villians fall entirely flat to me. It dosen't help I've been more into 80's, 90's and so on sitcoms, as most 70's sitomcs either werne't avaliable to me as a kid or just weren't funny.

Brady himself is a bit better, being pompous, arrogant and the kind of former star WORTH mocking: someone who was famous for five minutes, whose show got cancleed (as we learn on a where are they now type thing you can optionally watch in the office) in favor of Soda Poppers. He didn't seem to suffer any abuse and thus decided brainwashing was better and pettily made the soda poppers lives even worse just to satisfy his ego. I also like his bits every time a soda popper is clubbed as he enjoys it.. only to realize his plan is unraveling as a result and that's not good.

To actually get into his evil layer though, the Brady Culture Home for Former Child Stars, our heroes have to get admitted and have to be diagnosed with artifical personality syndrome. Symptoms include an obession with money, a violent reaction to dentestry and an unconcious desire to see one peers getting older, so to get comitted we go to Cybil. I took her up on her offer of free psychatricy earlier and honestly while it's easy enough at least for the first two tests to get diagonsed, her tests are worth spending a while just messsing around with. We start with an ink blot test which is full of great answers, followed by a word assicoation where you can just.. react howeve ryou like, though myf aviorite is also the one needed simply pulling out your gun and shooting things. Granted I'm not a fan of a gun in real life… but I also suspect randomly shooting non living objects is something sam and max do for fun anyway, so it's fine here.

The final test is the hardest and the only one I needed help on as it's "your peers aging"… and you have PLENTY of options of stuff ot see from max's head on a plant to bosco as your father figure and mos tof it is hliariously, partly because Sybil is VERY bad at her job and frequently calls you some degree of crazy, and because she's convinced herself max is Sam's imaginary friend despite being both able to see him and interact with him. It's great stuff and like any great time concludes with a jump out a window and Sybil singing off.

Things.. don't go great though as just a few minutes later Sam is brainwashed and giving away tapes. This puzzle took me a second but i'm proud of myself for solving it: you simply grab the cheese and get conked out. The following setpiece is a LOT of fun as you have to take out a bunch of brady culture heads: he's stolen max's body, shown up in the light socket, on the tv and in the closet as a cheese man.

The solutions are all fun: you simply jimmy your antena to shut off the tv, turn the light off to turn off Brady

And most hilarously, make Jimmy Two Teeth giant with a bike pump.. which took a second to figure out but is oh so satisfying when he finally gets messily devoured by a rat. Huh.. I wonder if i'm the one who needs therapy , not sam. Who am I kidding.. we both do.

There's also a puzzle I tried my best to solve but just.. coudln't. You can use the one way sign the boys have ot reverse gravity but I coudln't figure out how to get max's head onto hugh. As it turns out what I was supposed to do was shoot the sign, and once I read that in my guide, it was easy enough to grab the little budy head and thus take my brain back.

With that our hero is free but he has to go rescue max. Problem is to prevent this repeating again we have to figure something out. Thankfully Sybil has some blueprints from a patient for an anti mind control device, who i'm sure will be important later but for this chapter this gross breech of doctor patient confdientiatly nets me what I need and Bosco is able to build it.. and thankfully let us back in after the whole brainwashing incident. What's a good tape delivery between friends eh?

So that leads us to our finale. Using the weird helmet, Sam is able to resist the hypno ray and it seems has a straight shot to brady.. until the soda poppers show up… and immdietly get brainwashed making this climax into an actual puzzle.

Thankfully you can talk to them and there are plenty of fun options from becoming sam to becoming brady to play around with for a while before the actual solutoin: Have them worship you.. then get brady confused enough to order them to attack him instead of "the dog", allowing you to pass through , rescue your little buddy, and have Hugh Bliss blissfully dead. Sadly the Soda Poppers are still alive but you can't have everything I guess. Our heroes have won.. but it' shinted on th etv that this hypno buisness isn't sovled.

Culture Shock is a fun start to thing. Like I said the villians.. are okay. Brady is funny enough thanks to his voice acting, but the soda poppers are one guy whose kinda there.. and two of the most annoying wastes of space and my patience i've ever seen. Especially you peepers, especially you. But the comedy is still at a fever pitch enough to be fun, and theres enough highlights, paticuarlly the second act with the therapy and sam's brain sequences, to make this a solid start. Pick up this game if you haven't and i'll see you next chapter as our heros have to taste the fame to stop another mind control scheme. Until then you can follow me here and on twitter for more shenanigans. Thanks for reading.

#sam and max #sam and max save the world #Nintendo switch #telltale games #bosco #sybil #skunkape games #sam #max #peepers #specs #whizzer

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optreasurecruise · 1 year ago

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some more updates on future plans

Hello! Sorry if these kinds of posts are annoying but anyways, I just have some brief information on some future plans.

First off, I'm almost done with the start of the tag masterlists. Sometime soon I will post the tag directory but only one the alphabetical character list has been worked on thus far. I have plans to do one for characters by affilations, one for specific group tags, and one for arcs/outfit types.

Second, I've nearly queued up all of the remaining artwork. I actually recently just finished all of the artwork since I started this blog, but there's been some new ones since then.

Third, I mentioned sprites and sprite sheets in this post, and my plans to post them. I've been playing around with making some of the sprites animated and it's been pretty good (I'll show you the few I've done so far at the bottom of this post). I can probably look up references for some of them, but definitely can't say they'll be very accurate or perfect without proper reference. Either way, my goal will be to post both the animated sprites and the sprites sheets, but I will no longer be posting hourly once I reach that point. I will continue to post new artworks and I will probably post sprites daily.

The process for animating the sprites is pretty tedious. I've been using Ezgif which has a sprite sheet animator, so that does help. They definitely look pretty iffy but eh, I tried? It's not going to be easy. You can definitely see some misplaced pixels so I'll have to look into a way to clean them up. Just issues with working with transparent images I suppose.

#update

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hannahsassessmentjourney · 1 year ago

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Appointment the first: Background

In hindsight, I'm really, really glad I took the time to list out my sensory issues whenever I did so recently, because it was one of the things she asked at the appointment today (the first appointment, going through various development and history things).

There were a few questions she asked that I couldn't answer, but that's okay. And I don't really remember much of the appointment by now, anyway. She made some comment towards the end of it about masking, which I thought was interesting; I wouldn't necessarily call what I do masking, though I don't know if others would. I've never really thought of it that way. Possibly 'runlikepeopleexpect.exe' is actually masking, who knows.

I also played with an infinity cube ($2.75 at Kmart in Australia) the entire time, and barely made eye contact at all. I can't even picture her face (though even if I'd been staring at her the whole time I couldn't necessarily picture it, because that gets iffy for me).

Anyhow, second appointment is on the 24th - ten days from now. She told me details about it towards the end of the session, but I was getting quite overwhelmed by then and thus couldn't easily process what she was saying. Rightly or wrongly, I figured she'd reiterate them if necessary. She has to be used to working with people who process things differently or with more difficulty than the average population, right?

I sincerely hope there are instructions for some mystery thing she said I had to fill in before the next appointment and that would be emailed to me, though. I missed all that. (You know when your brain just switches off and you've suddenly got to figure out what's going on with only half a sentence and the expectation that you will respond to whatever they just said? Yeah.)

#asd assessment

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jacksgreysays · 2 years ago

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It sounds like the most likely option would be for ANY to gather support and force Naruto to resign in favor of a different candidate. I think they'd go for a more political approach, both because Naruto is not great at politics and also because they know actual fighting would end poorly, y'know?

Probably not Kakashi, but maybe someone like Tenten? Or Neji? Someone respected, mostly neutral, but also leaning a little more in Shikako's favor so as to get her home - aryaokayfriend

That's definitely a reasonable alternative course of action, aryaokayfriend, and I would think in a less bleak AU such a route would be feasible and without worse consequences. But since this is a bleak AU and thus everyone is being their most cynical/suspicious, it's unfortunately not the path the ANY clans can take. But, to clarify, when I say civil war, it is largely a COLD civil war in that the ANY clans ALSO don't want it to end in actual fighting--the secession IS them politically/legally maneuvering their way out of being part of Konoha (ie if the clans joined Konoha initially with the understanding that certain clan rights would be respected, then the Incident was a violation of that founding contract)

Although, to be fair, part of the problem is that the point in the timeline that Primadonna Girl (ftvuwc) happens is a full decade AFTER the Incident. And I would also think that the ANY clans already TRIED other methods before settling on a mass exodus/secession from Konoha. Especially early on when the Incident was still fresh and a vote of no confidence (or at least the military dictatorship equivalent) on Naruto would be striking while the iron was hot. A full decade later would be too late. Especially if you consider that a decade of peace is probably one of the better/longer Hokage reigns.

I do have the headcanon that the Akimichi (and thus the Nara and Yamanaka) have closer ties to the daimyo of the Land of Fire than the other Konoha clans, and such a thing could be useful for gathering economic/political support. And I do think that economic/political support is also useful for the ANY clans (and whoever decide to go with them) to essentially found their own mini-village. But while that economic/political support would put pressure on Naruto's reign (perhaps not as drastic as what happened with the Fourth Kazekage before the Konoha Chuunin Exams) there's other, more important, factors to consider seeing as how the Hokage is not beholden to the daimyo but rather a deterrent to the other hidden villages (ie, our leader is so strong, don't mess with us)

Which gets to the second part, in that for all that Naruto is not politically savvy, he is undeniably one of the strongest shinobi of Konoha. It's part of the reason why Danzo didn't become Hokage after the Sandaime died even though he must have jumped at the opportunity: there were two more obviously powerful candidates available (Jiraiya and Tsunade.) So there's more than just administration when it comes to being Hokage. And, again, to be fair this is right after an attempted invasion with them fully knowing that Orochimaru is a major threat and Tsunade is one of the few people who can take him in a fight. World peace is a little iffy in a society of magical military might as the basis for government, but even if it didn't matter how powerful a candidate is, it still matters how POPULAR a candidate is (ie, can their reputation alone protect the village)

And obviously Naruto's generation is absolutely FULL of badasses. Unfortunately, the only people who have the level of reputation that Naruto does are his teammates and his sensei who just stepped down. Which is part of the tension in the village since some people (in their most cynical/conspiracy theorist opinion) that the Incident happened as a way to get rid of Shikako. And while Naruto is not politically savvy, he is extremely charming/personable which Sasuke is not (and Sasuke wouldn't even want the role of Hokage. AND it would be very awkward for him to BECOME Hokage without it seeming like a huge betrayal to Naruto, no matter which side of the Incident Sasuke falls on.)

TenTen simply doesn't have the reputation or political backing (and some people, again in their most cynical opinion, would simply view her as a knock off Shikako considering a lot of her fire power comes from seals.) Neji might have a more impressive post-war reputation (since we're entertaining the idea that he lives in this otherwise extremely bleak AU) and is a clan kid but that's also part of the problem. Because he's part of the Branch House of the Hyuuga clan and has, essentially, a slavery seal on his forehead (again, bleak AU, we're presupposing the caged bird seal has not been dealt with) which is not something you want in a Hokage--although, as far as the cynical/conspiracy theorist versions of the Hyuuga are concerned they have Naruto who has, in all but name, married into the Main House.

There is also Sakura (because some part of me will always be so enamored with a Hokage!Sakura) depending on how actually devoted to world peace the other villages are because she is the last apprentice of Tsunade and so has both the healing and combat abilities to ride that legacy even if she doesn't have the clan lineage that other candidates have. Especially if, given Konoha is already known for being medical leaders, that's the direction they (and I don't know who "they" are tbh) essentially market Sakura as a Hokage candidate. And while those same cynical people who thought TenTen is just a knock off Shikako would think of Sakura as a knock off Tsunade, that's not as bad a thing. Because Shikako is still arguably available, versus Tsunade being fully retired (or deceased?) and passed her prime. Sakura as a knock off Tsunade is the closest to a Tsunade in her prime that the Konoha would be able to get at the point in time everything goes down. Additionally, Sakura is not as close to Naruto in DoS as she is in canon and so she wouldn't be as concerned about it and it wouldn't feel as much like a betrayal for her to replace Naruto as Hokage.

Unfortunately, there would still be that sign of weakness that Konoha would even switch Hokage without the previous Hokage being dead/medically unfit. Would the other villages act on it considering the "world peace?" I don't know, but it certainly doesn't look good.

I know I said it jokingly in the first PG(ftvuwc) review response, but at this point in the timeline, it might actually be that the safest/least politically tumultuous route to fixing this bleak AU is for Shikadai to become Hokage. Or at the very least declare his intentions to be Hokage (since I don't think Konoha's political landscape can survive another decade of cold civil war.)

And it does harken back to the original premise of Naruto (boy trying to be powerful/Hokage so as to protect his precious people) in a very twisty sort of way.

Because Shikadai (declaring his intent to) becoming Hokage does unpack the politics of the Incident without needing anyone (ie Naruto and Shikako) to backtrack their decisions. (Not that, at this point, the individuals that used to be friends, Naruto and Shikako, WOULDN'T backtrack and apologize to each other. But by this point in time they are no longer individuals so much as they are unwilling symbols of different sides of a civil war.)

And while Shikamaru wouldn't have had the power/reputation to be a Hokage candidate, Shikadai is also Temari's son (and the Incident was a consequence of how she was the better Kazekage candidate than Kankurou) and he's been a motivated Nara since the beginning similar to Shikako AND if he does end up getting the deer summons from her (and maybe other training?), will probably end up her heir which is, similar to Sakura, enough of a connection that he can ride that legacy even if he never becomes AS badass as Shikako.

As for the other side, it wouldn't be seen as Naruto being replaced so much as it would be passing the hat along to the next generation. Yes, it would be him retiring relatively early as opposed to having to step down because of health (or death) but it would be less jarring politically (internally and internationally) if it's going to the next generation rather than laterally to someone less powerful in his same generation.

This is probably way more of a response than you were expecting for, aryaokayfriend. Sorry about that, the brainrot is real.

the bleak primadonna au brainrot is real

I have loved your posts on characters' thoughts so far, but I haven't really seen Kakashi mentioned? How does he feel about the whole ordeal? How is he reacting to the fallout? What would he do if there was a civil war over it?

AHHHHHH, anon, thank you for validating bleak primadonna AU brainrot is real. I’m patient zero and it is wild how much I keep thinking about it, lol.

To be fair I hadn’t really considered Kakashi much in this AU until you asked. Except for the canonical “had he still been Hokage this wouldn’t have happened” type thing. But as a person also affected by the Incident and, again, living with the knowledge that he could have prevented this, there’s all that good classic Kakashi Guilt™

BECAUSE I do still stand by the idea that he would have given Shikako her justified revenge. BUT ALSO, another part of the reason for the brewing civil war is that some people think Shikako is the better Hokage candidate so there must be a part of Kakashi that is wondering what if he had chosen Shikako as his successor.

And, like, we have to imagine that when it came time for Kakashi to pass down the hat he did know that objectively Shikako is the better leader, administrator, mentor/guide, general, etc. etc. Of course as of canon DoS, Naruto is still out on his time skip training trip, but Shikako has gone full jounin with SQ’s world building of peace time jounin requirements and even before then we see the difference between Shikako taking the lead on missions versus Naruto being mission leader.

Although, again, haven’t consumed Boruto, so I don’t know if they ever explained what happens between teen Naruto to Hokage Naruto. He could still be genin ranked for all I know, although I would think that whatever powers that be that decide the next Hokage would want him to prove himself as a jounin. And while, arguably, wartime promotions are a thing (obviously child Kakashi didn’t have a civic leadership project considering his almost literal lone wolf vibe and also being a child) the whole point of a Hokage Naruto is that he wants/brought about a world of peace. Which is to say that we don’t necessarily know what Naruto will end up doing for his jounin civic leadership project or even if one is required of him, but I can’t imagine it’s more impressive/significant than the, essentially, multiple jounin civic leadership projects that Shikako has done/contributed to, etc.

All of that to say, if Kakashi were to be logical about his successor he would definitely consider/ask Shikako first—privately so as not to rub it in Naruto and Sasuke’s faces--then ask for her opinion on who it should be after she says no. Because obviously he knows about being a reluctant Hokage forced into a position he doesn’t want (he probably tried to pass down the hat even earlier, but it’s not until a certain age when his students are a more acceptable option that it becomes reasonable) and he would never want to do the same thing to his students. And of course at this point in time—post war/all threats dealt with—Shikako just wants to relax and come up with cool seals and not worry about any oncoming tragedy so she certainly doesn’t want to be Hokage. And moreover of course she wouldn’t want to steal Naruto’s dream. So she turns Kakashi down.

(And this is maybe something she thinks about, too. After everything. The hubris she had that even if she didn’t become Hokage that she could still guide/influence her friends into doing what she wanted/thought was correct. And how galling it must have been when Naruto refused her. O_O)

But back to Kakashi.

He wonders, maybe, if he should have… not MADE her take the hat per se, but been a little more convincing. Encouraged her toward it in a way that said, “Hey, I was the best option Konoha had at the time and I stepped up. I think you’re the best option Konoha has now and I want you to step up, too.” Because it’s not always about who WANTS it the most but who is BEST for the role.

(And also, for all that Naruto is arguably not great in the bleak primadonna AU, I don’t think he’d be resentful towards Shikako had she become Hokage. He would have been a little heart broken for a little bit, maybe, and always think about it wistfully, but I think he would have eventually come to terms with it and, like, re-contextualize his desire to be Hokage for what it really was (to be publicly respected and liked which he achieved before becoming Hokage anyway))

But, let’s move beyond Kakashi’s Guilt and Regrets™

If Sasuke is conflicted to the point of being neutral and staying in the village, I would want to do something different with Kakashi. In classic Kakashi fashion, he does turn the blame inwards, but he also has to never show it because now—with the exception of Gai—the only people he can be vulnerable about these types of things are his students who are at the heart of the issue (and also Sasuke who is already SO conflicted)

It’s a very fine line he is walking and I’m not sure if I’m even articulating it right, but basically I think he is a big Kako Heijo fan but also never acknowledges who Kako Heijo really is. Like, whenever possible, he goes to the midnight premieres of her movies but never reaches out to use his obvious connections to get merch or autographs or special seating or anything like that. Why would he? He’s just a fan of Kako Heijo. He has no other connection to her. Of course he never taught her, you must be confused, Kako Heijo is a civilian actress not a shinobi. Why are you being so weird. Oh, you must be thinking of my student Shikako Nara. I suppose they have similar names, but I don’t see how you’d get them confused.

Extreme denial is the way he’d go.

I also think, in order to prevent… hm… there’s probably another faction in the village who want Kakashi to be Hokage again instead. Like, a neutral faction or a faction who is also trying to prevent a civil war by seeking a third option or, like, the older generation who see both Shikako and Naruto as overdramatic upstarts because Kakashi shouldn’t have even given up the hat anyway. You keep it until you die (or are unable to fight. Actually, DOES something happen to Kakashi that would make him unable to fight? I did not read much of Shippuden.) But even if Kakashi thought it would work (it wouldn’t) I don’t think he’d want to be Hokage again. And if anything that would just be kicking the problem further down the line because he’d have to retire again eventually and his successors would still be Naruto and Shikako… and maybe Sasuke, although I feel like he’d want it even less?

Anyways… in order to prevent that, I think Kakashi really is leaning into the whole… I’m just a silly old man. Yes I used to be Hokage and one of the deadliest S-rank shinobi on the planet, but now I like to watch movies and play with my dogs, nothing to see here.

And so as not to seem one-sided in his personal but not professional support, I do think Kakashi gets closer to the Uzumaki family as, like, a strange uncle figure (which adds to Boruto’s weird double prince privilege vibe) so its not just them and the Hyuuga clan. But understandably it gets fraught when Naruto neglects his fatherly duties to be Hokage—which both Boruto and Himawari are sad about and only adds to the guilt that Kakashi points inward—and Kakashi doesn’t help him with that because 1) that’s not his job anymore, 2) he’s just a silly old man, and 3) if Kakashi helps Naruto professionally then what was the point of even passing the hat down, if he’s going to advise Naruto then he should have just kept it and maybe the Incident wouldn’t have happened and he wou—

Things get cyclical with Kakashi and his Guilt/Regret Spiraling™

When I say civil war, I don’t actually think there will be outright war and fighting. Most of the movement would be led by the ANY clans and most of that would be a peaceful secession from Konoha, possibly citing the original clan laws of why they joined Konoha in the first place, and sort of implying that there were contracts in place about clan responsibilities to the village and vice versa when Konoha was founded.

Now whether or not the other side accepts the secession peacefully is up in the air, but the ANY clans have been PLANNING and PREPARING for this for a long time so i would think that if it did come to actual battle, the ANY clans would have the foresight to have already evacuated all their noncombatants which puts more risk for the other side. And, sure, Naruto would kick Chouji’s ass—especially since, without Shikamaru, he and Ino aren’t as effective in battle as they were before and no way is Ino going to be able to mind jump a jinchuuriki—but by that point it gets kinda dicey since like… Naruto’s whole stance is that he brought peace to the Elemental Nations and also that Shikako straight up murdered who she wanted… so obviously it’s not hypocrisy per se, but it doesn’t look great in either direction for Naruto if he lets a third of his village leave or if he forces(?) a third of his village to stay under threat of imprisonment(?)

Kakashi knows this. And this is the one case where he is being proactive, competent Hound/former Hokage in that he is trying to reintegrate the ANY clans into the village without tipping anyone off about the plan to secede and also that he knows about the plan to secede. Or maybe he doesn’t really KNOW it per se, but I think he gets the vibe that something is happening to the ANY clans similar to what happened to the Uchiha clan and he’s trying to fix the problem the same way he would have fixed that without realizing that the ANY clans are isolating/diminishing their presence themselves rather than it being done to them by other people.

(Because if it comes to actual war, Kakashi knows what he’ll do. It’s what he’s always done. He’ll fight for Konoha. He’ll kill for Konoha. He doesn’t want to, but he will if it comes to that. But it won’t. Because the Hokage is Naruto and that’s what got them into this situation in the first place)

That being said, it really does depend on the Hyuuga Branch House on whether or not things turn to violence. Because if the ANY clans are able to recruit the Branch House they get that moral victory AND the majority of Konoha’s current most powerful bloodline which means that even if the other clans are willing to stay with Naruto’s village, much less fight for it, odds are not in their favor. But, if the ANY clans CAN’T recruit the Branch House, it then depends on whether they are willing to fight against their current best chance at removing the seal (because even if Shikako is currently off being Kako Heijo that doesn’t mean she won’t at some point go back to sealing. And she won’t look favorably on them if they mess with her clans) and even if they do fight, I can’t imagine they’re going to go all out. (And, also, I have to wonder if Akimichi physiology is at all a deterrent to the Hyuuga’s style? Like… does their bulk mean that more effort is required to hit the tenketsu?)

And, like, even if the ANY clans lose, at worst Naruto is going to imprison them (specifically Chouji and Ino and maybe Kinokawa as the leaders) because the whole situation even started because he doesn’t believe in capital punishment. And then, what, their clans are just supposed to fall back in line without being resentful? And then as if Kako Heijo won’t come out of retirement to prison break her childhood friends and her little brother. AND THEN! THAT JUST FURTHER PROVES THE FUTILITY OF NARUTO’S STANCE (but also does maybe now turn Shikako into an official S-rank nuke nin like the many Konoha S-rank nuke nin before her, but who’s going to go up against her, really, lol)

Oh Kakashi, so little of this is your fault, and yet I know he’s going to internalize all of it and just destroy himself emotionally while still being cool and casual externally.

Sorry for ranting, thank you for indulging me.

#jacksgreyson #aryaokayfriend #reblog #review response #brainstorm #primadonna girl (says no thank you)#naruto uzumaki #sasuke uchiha #tenten #neji hyuuga #sakura haruno #shikadai nara #shikako nara

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creamecream · 3 years ago

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Some of my BNHA characters as Pokémon because why not.

(Obviously can’t fit all of them)

Lyna Aymaya

(No proper gif found.)

Vivillon, either meadow or elegant form, as those include both the blue and pink of her wing colors.

Bianca Demetria

Glaceon.

Possibly shiny, as it’s a lighter color! but obviously, the ice fox for the ice fox.

Cassius Markandeya

Ninetales.

I know his coloring makes more sense with an umbreon, red eyes, black hair, etc. but ninetales fits his kyuubi aesthetic a lot better, so I went with ninetales.

Keiko Yamabiko

Noibat.

Because is smol and is bat, obviously.

Kotohina Emiyo

Lycanroc (midday form)

Doggo, protective doggo. midday form because while none of them are white, it has some browns like his skin, a large white tail, and blue eyes, just like Koko does.

Kaja Fukusha

Zorua.

Smol and mischievous, and full of, whilst illusions, changing appearance at will! so I found it the most fitting for Kaja.

Feel free to add some of your own!

#head kinda real empty so just have #only did characters I could pick out without too much thought #I didn’t wanna spend too long on this at all meh #I only was iffy on a few of these for a few seconds thus they made it in #like I have no idea what chisuke or aiko etc. etc. would be atm #so I just stuck with these guys #boku no hero academia #fan characters #lyna aymaya/lunar moth #bianca demetria/arctic fox #cassius markandeya/kyuubi #keiko yamabiko #kotohina emiyo #kaja fukusha #Creame brabbling

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punkylilwitch · 3 years ago

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Medusa

Myth vs. Modern

In mythology, the story of medusa has a couple translations that you’ll be sorry to hear aren't great. Specifically, the version that we hear today about Medusa being the victim is a lot more iffy than what’s been accepted by society. First, I’ll share the most widely recognized (and debated) stories, while I do this I’ll compare them to each other by sharing the history in the similar parts of Medusa’s story, and second I’ll share the modern reclaiming of the symbolism medusa has come to be.

The Beginnings

Medusa was born to Phorcys and Ceto, a minor sea god and water goddess/mother of sea monsters. Her siblings include Graeae (The sisters who share one eye and were forced into telling Perseus where Medusa laid so he could slay her. This was done by Perseus holding their eye hostage), Stheno and euryale the gorgons, Echidna the snake woman, Thoosa the sea nymph, Ladon the dragon (guardian of the Golden Apples in the Garden of the Hesperides), and the nymphs of the evening - the Hesperides. Medusa was the only one of her gorgon siblings who was born mortal. She was also the most human of all her siblings, even being beautiful amongst humans. She lived amongst the mortals because of this, becoming a priestess of Athena in Athens. She was incredibly popular out of the priestesses, gaining the attention of the god of the sea and storms Poseidon.

The Controversy

A Tragedy

Sympathetic - a curse given as a blessing

Some believe that Medusa’s curse was given to her as a blessing. In this variation, Medusa did not consent to Poseidon and Athena knew this, so she gave medusa the supposed power to keep away anyone else who may want to do this to Medusa again. This merely had the unfortunate side affect of afflicing literally everyone (sort of how the blessing of King Midas’ touch became a curse)

Cruel - a curse given out of malice

Others believe that Medusa did not consent to having intercourse with Poseidon, but was punished by Athena anyway. In this iteration, Athena blames Medusa for being too flamboyant and vain. Thus, the curse was given as just that - a curse.

Fairness in Justice

Justice - Medusa was cursed for being gross in a sacred place

A number believe that Medusa and Poseidon mutually had intercourse within Athena’s temple. Thus, Athena cursed her to more closely resemble her siblings so Medusa was forced to flee Athens and her life there.

Freeing - a curse given along with freedom

A few believe that Medusa and Poseidon willingly had intercourse in the temple, but that Athena was forgiving about it. They believe that this curse was given in order to free Medusa of her duties as priestess, freeing her from the burdens of humans and elevating Medusa to a divine form.

Misfortunate - Medusa tricked the gods into sympathizing with her

The remainder believe that Medusa maliciously tricked Athena into sympathizing with her this group is similar to the group seen in the “Sympathetic” section when it comes to the reason in which medusa was given the curse, but they believe that Athena purposely made it so that the power cannot be misused by making it affect medusa, ending in a sort of bittersweet power as a result. One thing I would like to note is that I could not find proof in this theory, but given the other theories, I decided to add it because some may believe it. Therefore, this theory is the only one without a source. If you have one, please feel free to reblog this and add it

But in every variation, a few things remain. Firstly, Poseidon left the moment they were caught in every variation. Secondly, what medusa became remains the same. Her long hair turned to snakes, her skin turned green, and her face was cursed so that anyone who looked upon it turned into stone. Thirdly, Medusa, once being transformed, no longer wanted to remain in Athens and instead fled to an island far away to be closer to her family.

Similarities

There are a couple ways in which Medusa’s story connects with itself. These are parts of the story historians are much less divided on.

One such connection is the known belief that in the story of Medusa, she is in the end killed by Perseus, who had been sent by Polydectes in the hopes that Perseus would be killed by the interaction. Instead, Perseus is aided by the gods by being given a sword and winged sandals from Hermes, and a mirror shield from Athena. He was also gifted just before this a cap of invisibility and a magical bag used to hold Medusa’s head safely once the deed had been done.

Notably, it was Athena’s temple in which Medusa was caught in, so take from that what you will. Medusa’s head is chopped off in her sleep, and that ends that.

Once Medusa was dead, Pegasus and Chrysaor were born of the wound, popping out of her neck and waking her two gorgon sisters who she was sleeping by in the cave. However, Perseus got away, delivering the head first to Polydectes and turning him to stone by showing the head to him and second delivering it to Athena. Also notable, Athena was then presented with this head as evidence of Perseus’ worthiness, which Athena then wore on her shield.

Modern Reclaiming

https://www.inkedmag.com/original-news/medusatattoos

Nowadays, most have accepted the theory that Medusa was taken against her will, though those who say she was a willing participant are still in the many. But Medusa’s story has evolved into much more than that. Now, She is a symbol of strength and being a survivor of SA (sexual assault) and is used in tattoos, stickers, art, and much more. Specifically, a medusa tattoo can be a protection from the evil, and/or a symbol of the victims. The most common interpretation of Medusa suggests she is an apotropaic symbol similar to the modern evil eye. She is said to represent a dangerous threat; and is meant to deter other dangerous threats. An image of evil to repel evil so to speak.

(I hope this doesn’t get taken down for nudity but it’s art soooo..?)

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/10/13/arts/design/medusa-statue-manhattan.html

According to this article called How a Medusa Sculpture From a Decade Ago Became #MeToo Art by The New York Times, A statue made by Luciano Garbati sparked quite some controversy. The art, called “Medusa With the Head of Perseus” is a riff on the previously mentioned tale in which Perseus takes the head of Medusa. Accoridng to the article, “On Tuesday[The article came out on October 13th of 2020], Mr. Garbati’s sculpture — “Medusa With the Head of Perseus” — was reimagined as a symbol of triumph for victims of sexual assault, when it was unveiled in Lower Manhattan, just across the street from the criminal courthouse on Centre Street.” (Julia Jacobs).

Sources:

Medusa and Poseidon did it willingly (discusses theories of Freeing and Justice) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrmjcQuG-Gg

Perseus’ story summary (comical and over simplified) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4h8vzK60yk

Lineage source and also they thought that Medusa and Poseidon had an affair and she was punished (discusses theory of Justice) - https://www.thoughtco.com/greek-mythology-medusa-1524415#:~:text=One%20of%20three%20Gorgon%20sisters,she%20was%20born%20at%20sea.

General story and also they believe that Medusa and Poseidon had intercourse willingly and Athena punished Medusa (though notably specifically because Medusa was impregnated and Athena was the goddess of virginity) - https://www.greekmythology.com/Myths/Creatures/Medusa/medusa.html

They believe that Medusa was a victim. (discusses theory of Cruel) TW: mentions of SA. - https://eportfolios.roehampton.ac.uk/hsa020c132h/2018/06/29/medusa-as-a-victim/#:~:text=Medusa%20was%20so%20beautiful%20that,Gorgon%20instead%20of%20helping%20her.

They believe that Athena had to protect her former priestess by cursing her. (discusses theory of sympathetic) TW: mentions of SA. - https://www.parlia.com/a/athena-helped-medusa-by-transforming-her-into (The source’s source -http://diaryoftheblackdog.blogspot.com/2017/10/medusa-was-defending-herself.html#:~:text=Athena%20did%20not%20punish%20Medusa,Medusa%20was%20never%20touched%20again.)

#classical mythology #greek mythology #medusa #medusa myth #mythology #greek myth retellings #greek myth #greek mythos #witchy #witches #witchcraft #witches of tumblr #witch

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disneyanddisneyships · 2 years ago

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Last chapter before the epilog! @gyubby99

"NORTH PLEASE HELP, ITS AN EMERGENCY!" Jack shouted into the empty room with only he and elsa. A portal opened up in the middle of the room and north popped his head in. "Time already? A week early?!" North exclaimed before he and Jack helped a pregnant Elsa into the portal. "Its not rocket science North! It's very iffy. All depends on if the baby is ready to- ahhhh!" Elsa cried. "You're lucky we got her room done early! Come, come. Go lay on thus bed and I'll get your family," North stated as he showed Elsa into a small room where Elsa would have the baby. "The contractions are getting stronger!- Agh!" Elsa yelled as she layed down on the birthing table.

A few minutes later everyone was out in the main room, waiting for the baby to be born. Jack was with elsa. "I don't understand, why are we not at a hospital?" Anna asked. "No one would've been able to see jack there! Which means he wouldn't have been able to hold his baby," Hiccup replied. "Okay but does norrh even know how to deliver a baby?" Anna asked. "Actually, yes, he does," tooth stated. Anna sighed. "I should be in there with her...." Anna muttered. "She wants the gender to be a suprise for us all," Kristoff stated. "I'm just happy we'll be here for this grandchild..." Agnarr murmured. "Where are your kids Anna?" Rapunzel asked. "School. I told tyen I wanted to enroll them into high-school and the principal let them join classes for the day," Anna replied. "Ugh. School is fer nerds, and people who can't have fun..." Merida stated. "Mer, you were homeschooled..." Rapunzel replied. "Aye, and I hated every second of it," Merida explained.

North walked out of the room, a smile on his face. "Elsa wants you all in now," North stated as he gestured for everyone to walk into the room. Elsa was in bed holding what looked to be two babies, while Jack was laying next to her, his arm wrapped around her shoulder. "Hey guys," Elsa said with a smile. "Twins?!" Anna exclaimed quietly so she wouldn't wake them. Elsa nodded. "A beautiful boy and a beautiful girl," Jack stated with tears in his eyes as he looked at his kids. "Anna, do you wanna hold one of them?" Elsa asked as she held the girl out to Anna. Anna took her, and the eye contact was immediate. Anna began to cry. "What are their names?" Anna asked with tears and a smile. "The girl is Ella, and the boy is Robin," Jack stated as he held his son and kissed him on the head before handing him to Agnarr. "He's so small...." Agnarr whispered as he held his grandson gently. "He's the youngest," Elsa stated. "They're about 5 minutes apart," she explained. Anna handed Ella to Iduna, and Agnarr handed Robin to Anna, and so on until everyone was able to hold both babies. Kristoff handed Ella back and Rapunzel handed Robin back. And the family stood like that for a while. Elsa and Jack looked at their small family that they created themselves and they smiled.

It took almost 300 years for this happily ever after. And it'll be at least 300 more years until it's over. But that's the story of how thus small group of people managed to create a family with each other, and it all started with a blast of ice.

#jelsa #frozen #elsa #frozen 2 #rotg #jack frost #rise of the guardians #snowtp #royalfrost #disney

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purefandomonium · 2 years ago

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Part 6: Blissful Ignorance

But wait, there's more!

Or in other words, this project is still ongoing. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year (because I probably won't be posting anything again until sometime after) and hope you enjoy!

RED: So what exactly is the point of all this?

“It’s just a stupid dance. They do it every year for the freshmen but the whole school can go.”

RED: You’re not.

She stopped cleaning the mess that was her room for a moment. She could use a break anyway. It was getting kind of troublesome having to stop every few seconds to read what Red was saying. Not to mention having one arm perpetually tied up with holding the GameBoy to do so. She’d taped the mic to it while she figured out something less bulky.

She fell onto her desk chair with a thump, sliding it back and bumping into the desk. An old keyboard and a couple pens fell to the floor with a clatter.

RED: What was that?

“Sat down too violently,” she said, absently wondering when he’d started hearing the background.

RED: Oh.

RED: So why aren’t you going?

“Why do you care so much? It’s not like it affects you.”

Red was unfazed by the curt reply.

RED: It’s just a bit strange to me that you don’t want to.

RED: My company can’t be that interesting.

“Trust me, it’s not,” she said with a smirk. “I’m just not into dances.”

Red considered that. Leann didn’t seem to be ‘into’ anything, if every previous conversation about her social life was anything to go by. She told him all about her little projects and hobbies, but all of them seemed devoid of anyone other than herself. The girl was clearly a loner and yet…

She didn’t sound very satisfied about that.

RED: Don’t you have friends?

His concept of time was still a bit iffy; being trapped for decades in digital hell did that to a person—or whatever he could call himself. However, he was fully aware of the amount of time he’d spent with Leann thus far and, unless she was lying to him and his sanity had degraded worse than he thought, she never seemed to hang out with anyone outside of school. It appeared she woke up, got ready, left, then came right home once the day was over. It was like clockwork. She picked up the GameBoy at almost the same time every. Single. Day.

He may have lost his mind in that damn cartridge, but he wasn’t stupid.

The hesitation in her voice only drove the point home further.

“I have friends,” she said, tone defensive.

RED: Doesn’t sound like it to me.

RED: Don’t take it the wrong way.

RED: I’m just worried.

Red? Worried? For her, no less? The thought was both slightly amusing and more than a little unusual. “What are you worried for? I just don’t really like anyone.”

RED: Out of an entire school of students, there isn’t a single one you get along with?

“What happened to all that mistrust you had a month ago?” She was starting to get a little weirded out by his prying. The more time she spent with him, the more human he seemed. She often found herself lying awake at night, staring at the lit GameBoy on the desk and wondering how something so complex could exist within it. Red wasn’t programming. Couldn’t have been. Which didn’t leave a whole lot of options. Either he was the soul of some dead kid trapped in there, or he was some sort of demonic entity. Neither were things she should really be messing with, if she was being honest. Still…

She did enjoy the company.

Red didn’t respond immediately, opting instead to contemplate. What had happened to that mistrust? At some point in time he couldn’t remember, he just… started trusting her. He tried telling himself it was because it was nice to have someone to actually talk to, and it was. But that didn’t give him a reason for what he was doing right now, did it? He was picking up on things that he shouldn’t even be concerned with. What did it matter if she didn’t have friends?

A month ago, he’d have said nothing to all of this. What changed?

“I take it you don’t know either,” she said to the screen, showing Red’s sprite as it stood somewhere in Viridian.

RED: …No.

For the life of him, he couldn’t figure out why he was being so friendly.

Though she still hadn’t been allowed anywhere near the game’s code, Red had allowed Leann to play the game normally once she made it clear she wasn’t going to hurt him anymore. He’d warn her if things were about to go south and he couldn’t prevent it, and she’d stop whatever she was doing and switch to something else.

Right now, she had a Caterpie for no particular reason that she was building up in her spare time. She didn’t have the heart to say anything, but she’d never actually been that into Pokemon. She only bought the cartridge because it was a ‘cool old thing!’ and it was cheap compared to the rest of the game store’s wares. She’d actually forgotten her GameBoy had even existed from its place in the back of her closet.

She was sure it would be a gut-punch to Red if he found out, so she kept silent and proceeded to Google reasons for why she did certain things. Poor guy didn’t seem to have any concept of the internet.

She hummed. “Can I ask you something personal?”

RED: Sure.

“Do you… I don’t know. Do you, like, remember exactly how you came to be… like this? Were you always aware you were in a game?”

It was something he’d pondered himself on multiple occasions. Hearing it asked from another person seemed to give him some form of clarity on the matter.

RED: I…

RED: I don’t know what first made me realize. If I had to guess…

RED: Maybe it was the same narrative repeating with every new game players created.

RED: The more it happened, the more I kept asking myself: Why? Why do I keep doing this? Hasn’t this been done before? Why do I need to keep repeating it? What’s making me do this?

The text got a little too cozy in the box and some of it ended up cut off. She could still make it out though. It seemed she’d opened some sort of floodgate.

RED: People I thought were my friends, rivals… EVERYONE started repeating the same lines all of a sudden.

RED: No matter what happened, it was the same set of dialog. Almost like they were following some sort of script.

RED: …Do you know what it’s like to realize you never had any freedom? To have your illusion of choice ripped away from you and be told you were MADE to do this?

“…No. I don’t.” The thought made her stomach twist.

RED: Even my accomplishments were stripped from me. The only things I could hold onto that made me something, GONE. Taken by something “better.”

Her interest piqued at that. “I don’t know if you still remember, but early on when we started talking… Back when I had to spell out everything, you mentioned being replaced? What did you mean by that?”

RED: They took everything from me and replaced me like I meant NOTHING. Then they cast me aside to rot while my legacy was destroyed by some…

RED: …BROWN-HAIRED KID.

‘Brown-haired kid?’ Suddenly it clicked. “Do you mean the games that came after yours?”

RED: …

She could practically feel the anger emanating from those three dots. Now it made sense. Mostly. There was just one issue: How in the world did he know there were other games? If she was the first person he ever had a conversation with, then how could he know about the newer games? And there were so many. Was his anger directed at all of them or a handful in particular?

She cursed her lack of knowledge on the franchise and made a mental note to look into things later. Back to the matter at hand, she wondered if maybe he had somehow read the data on the different GameBoys he was inserted into. Maybe he had some sort of backwards compatibility that let him look into the tiny internal memory. She wasn’t an expert, but she figured it might be likely that there were little traces of data here and there that remained on the console itself. Data that would reveal there were different games and that Red wasn’t in them. If that was the case, then it was likely his anger was directed at any subsequent games that would’ve been out in the 90’s or so and not, say, games on the DS or something.

“That’s… I’m really sorry, Red. I wish I could say I understand what that’s like but…” She struggled to think of an appropriate response. “I don’t know if it matters any to you, but yours is the best game in my opinion.” Technically a bit of a stretch, seeing as how this was the only Pokemon game she’d ever owned, let alone played—save for a random Pokemon-themed pinball game she used to have—but the poor guy deserved some validation. It wasn’t exactly a lie either; she would gladly trade every game she owned if it meant getting to keep his.

RED: …….Thanks.

RED: That actually means a lot.

It felt wrong to ask him if he had a prior life to all this, so she left the conversation where it was at. She was no closer to figuring out what he was now than before, but that was ok. At least he seemed to be feeling a bit calmer now. A change to a lighter topic was in order.

She asked him if he knew about TV shows.

So confession time: I actually never have owned or played a single Pokemon game in my entire life. I have recently been thinking about picking up one just to try it, but yeah. The mention of the GameBoy Pokemon Pinball thing is legit the only game I've ever played. Funny, right? Of course I remember the original series, I had a few toys and even some of the movies, but I was never really into the franchise. Would not have seen myself doing this at any point in time but hey, life's weird like that.

Part 5: here

Part 7: here

#glitchy red #pokepasta #my writing #fanfic #yes i know i'm taking many artistic liberties here #this was never supposed to be a retelling though #think of it as a sort of alternate “what if”#one that's mostly comprised of my own headcanons for glitchy #it's still gonna make some mentions to certain things from the original creepypasta #and i think it still works regardless of if you think this takes place after the original story or if that never happened #or maybe it doesn't #idk #connection

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itsmaddienotmaddy · 3 years ago

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I’m staying awake by sheer force of irritability to give a ROUSING recap of the most boring game of soccer that we all decided was worth watching in the middle of the night.

US v. Australia

Alyssa - sweet Alyssa. Out there, saving the ball, watching her teammates play like strangers. I’m happy that she got a clean sheet at least.

Becky - had a good game. Like she said, it’s not her job to score goals. It’s her job to not let the other team and she DID THAT. Maybe she should have tried to score. Would have at least made things more interesting.

Tierna - she was absolutely the right choice to start and play a full 90 over Abby. She was her usual calm and collected self and even though Kerr didn’t seem fully in it, Baby T squandered any chances she thought she had. So proud.

Crystal - a good game. Not to her usual standards but that’s because she’s usually so insanely good. Few great defensive saves but wasn’t able to push into the attack. And we need her to do that.

Kelley - she did fine. Few iffy moments, but nothing dangerous. Was moving well and got good crosses off. That cross to Alex’s offsides goal was so PRETTY. I’m a little salty about that. Hopefully her fragile joints are okay from the few tackles she got tangled in.

Julie - Julie Ertz appreciation over here because she did save our butts a little bit. She was one of the few that looked like she was trying out there. Another full ninety for her, hopefully she can keep it up otherwise…. We a little (a lot) fucked

Rose - Rosemary. The only one with energy. The only one who looked aware she was playing an Olympic game. She looked fast. She looked strong. And she was creating chances. Her defensive slide tackles were sexy. I don’t know how she was not screaming at everyone to help her tf out.

Sam - Sammy is having a really tough tournament and I just want to sit her down on the sidelines with some orange slices and find out what the hell is going on with her. The turnovers, the positioning, the physicality, just all off.

Lindsey - she did better than Sam, I guess. I wanted and expected more from her. She definitely created more opportunities and helped us keep better possession. Would have loved her header off the Tierna set piece to at least have been on frame.

Kristie - wish she was in sooner for Sam Kerr chaos. Whatever. She was running around a little more than everyone else. She looked happy to be there.

Alex - had glimmers of brilliance. Her run through in the first half where she fell and didn’t get the shot off well. The GOAL. VAR is a fugly slut and I don’t trust her. Alex was definitely frustrated, v apparent by the few seconds of her on the sideline just shaking her head. SAME GIRL.

Pinoe - she always does better as a sub so idk why we’re so insistent at starting her. Her and Carpenter are always a fun match up to watch though. Even in this boring ass game. Pinoe didn’t do much, but to her credit, did track back on defense a good bit which, for her, is BIG

Christen - ugh. pressy. She got herself in position and got some beautiful opportunities. The finish just wasn’t there for her today. Like Alex, was frustrated. Hope she tells her legs ‘good job’ anyway.

Tobin - this may have been her best game thus far, but still v far from her best playing form. It looked like she started a small spark when she came in with Lindsey but it dimmed quickly as the mood of the game brought her down. Was that field an energy vacuum? Seriously. The fuck.

Carli - I thought we were gonna press when she came on but I GUESS NOT. She shoulda just gone rogue and tried anyways.

Lynn - OLYMPICS DEBUT. Happy for her for that. But like with Carli, why weren’t they just let loose? Lynn is so fast! We know this! Everyone knows this. Let her RUN!

I think we’re all out here, once again, asking the gals to GET IT TOGETHER. Selfishly, if we’re going to be staying up for these 3 am games, can they at least try and keep us awake?

I’m at a loss as to what kind of kick in the ass everyone needs.

But whatever. I’ll support them when they win. Support them when they lose. Support them when they play sleepy, boring games where the back lines just pass back and forth for 5 minute stretches while everyone watches.

LFG. (To bed.)

#uswnt #alyssa naeher #becky sauerbrunn #tierna davidson #crystal dunn #kelley o'hara #julie ertz #sam mewis #rose lavelle #lindsey horan #kristie mewis #alex morgan #megan rapinoe #christen press #tobin heath #carli lloyd #lynn williams

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crusherthedoctor · 3 years ago

Note

Can you list anything you unironically like in the games (and cartoons and comics) that you don't like?

I won't bother mentioning music, since that goes without saying and is to be expected for a Sonic game... unless you're Chronicles.

Sonic Adventure 2 (mixed gameplay-wise, annoying story-wise) - While I prefer Sonic's SA1 levels for a number of reasons, I still think his and Shadow's gameplay in SA2 is fun on its own merit. I also don't mind the treasure hunting gameplay returning or how big the levels are this time around, since Knuckles and Rouge are still fast and not '06 levels of slow. It's mainly the gimped radar that creates the unfortunate domino effect of making them a problem.

- Introduced Rouge, one of my favourite characters for how playful she is and how she's a lot more nuanced and intelligent than you'd expect.

- Some genuinely good scenes, like Eggman's trap on the A.R.K and Sonic escaping from the G.U.N. helicopter.

- Had some good ideas going for it, like the Pyramid Base and the Biolizard as a scientific monster instead of an ancient one.

- Despite my thoughts on the backstory itself (or rather, its execution), Shadow has enough depth and subtle qualities and occasional unintended hilarity to stand out from the typical dark rival characters you see in media.

- The Last Scene's music in particular is one of my favourite cutscene tracks in the series.

Sonic Heroes (mixed gameplay-wise, loathed story-wise) - The gameplay is fun when you're not being screwed over by repetitive combat, overly long levels and/or ice physics.

- Boasts some of the most consistently Genesis-worthy environments in the 3D games, up there with SA1's and Colours'.

- The in-game dialogue that isn't the same tutorial drivel repeated ad nauseam can be interesting, funny, etc.

- Reintroduced the Chaotix, which provided me with another character I quite like in the form of Vector.

- Bringing Metal Sonic back in full force and front and center in the plot after a long absence (not counting cameos and the like) is a perfectly fine idea. Just... not like this.

Sonic Battle (decent yet repetitive gameplay, mixed story-wise) - Emerl's arc is compelling, and it earns the emotional weight of having to put him down at the end.

- While some characters are iffy (read: Amy), other characters are extremely well-handled. Shadow is probably the prime example.

- Gamma's belly dance healing animation is fucking hilarious.

- When I was young, and the game was first announced, I was really excited about being able to play as Chaos. This proved to be my downfall when it turned out he was arguably one of the worst characters in the game due to being slower than me during the writing process, but I still recall that excitement fondly.

Shadow the Hedgehog (comedy classic) - The sheer amount of legendary stupidity this game has going for it makes it practically impossible to actually hate. It helps that it's not quite as white-knighted on the same level as '06... usually. You know you're in for a unique experience when you hear a gunshot every time you click something in the menu.

- By extension, Black Doom never gained an unironic fanbase like Mephiles/Scourge/Eggman Nega did, which means I'm a lot more willing to take Doom's dumbass brand of villainy in stride. He even has a unique design... a terrible one that rips off Wizeman granted, but alas, even that is a step-up from Fridge Shadow and Bumblebee Eggman.

- Despite being... well, Shadow the Hedgehog, some of the environments would fit right in with any other Sonic game, like with Circus Park, Lava Shelter, and Digital Circuit. Even the Black Comet levels look pretty cool.

- This game understands amnesia better than IDW does.

Sonic '06 (what do you think?) - The obvious one: Shadow's character was handled pretty well, even if it came at the cost of everyone else being a dummy and being forced to interact with Mephiles.

- Like SA2, there are some good moments, like the Last Story ending sequence with Sonic and Elise.

- In the greatest form of irony ever, I like Solaris as a concept and design(s), and its backstory has potential to serve as a parallel with Chaos without being a complete ripoff. Iblis sucks, Mephiles sucks, but I'm fine with Solaris.

- Introduced legendary characters like Sonic Man, Pele the Beloved Dog, Hatsun the Pigeon, and Pacha from The Emperor's New Groove.

The Rivals duology (apathetic outside of Nega-related grumbling) - There were some cool zone ideas in both games that were sadly let down by the restrictive and limiting gameplay. I particularly like Colosseum Highway for thus far being the only full-on Roman level in the series instead of merely having a couple minor hints of Roman, and Meteor Base for the unique scenario of the space station being built into an asteroid. These level concepts and others deserve a second chance IMO. (At least Frontier Canyon got a second chance in the form of Mirage Saloon, amirite?)

- Ifrit has a better design than Iblis. Not saying it's amazing, but the Firebird motif it has going on is a lot more interesting for a fire monster than the Not-Chaos schtick they had with Iblis.

Sonic and the Secret Rings (a very frustrating gaming experience) - Erazor Djinn, A.K.A. Qui-Gon Djinn, A.K.A. Dr. N. Djinn, A.K.A. I'll Take It On The Djinn, A.K.A. Not From The Hairs On My Djinny Djinn Djinn, is one of the best villains not associated with Eggman in the series. He's a Mephiles-type character done right, and there's actual weight and reason to his actions, however sinister or petty.

- I don't have strong opinions either way on Shahra as a character, but the Sonic/Shahra friendship is sweet and well-handled.

- The ending is one of Sonic's greatest moments. The sheer contrast between how ruthlessly he deals with Erazor and how comforting he is towards Shahra speaks volumes... Still gonna make fun of the mountain of handkerchiefs though. (Before anyone lectures me, I understand the significance of it and can even appreciate it from that angle... doesn't mean I'm not allowed to poke fun at it. :P)

- Another game with some redeeming environments. I love the aesthetic of Night Palace, and Sand Oasis looks gorgeous too.

Sonic Chronicles (my personal least favourite game in the series) - Uh...

- Um...

- Er...

- I like Shade's design?

Sonic Unleashed (overrated game and story IMO) - The obvious two: the opening sequence and the Egg Dragoon fight deserve all the praise they get.

- Seeing Eggmanland come to life was an impressive moment to be sure. While part of me does feel it didn't quite measure up to what I had in mind (ironically, the Interstellar Amusement Park ended up being closer to what I had in mind), it still looks badass and works well for what it is. I also don't mind the idea of it being a one-level gauntlet... key word being idea.

- Obviously, the game looks great. Not a fan of the real world focus (real world inspiration is fine, but copy-pasting the real world and shoving loops in it is just unimaginative), but it can't be denied that the environments look good.

- This game pulled off dialogue options a lot better than Chronicles did, since they didn't rely on making Sonic OoC.

Sonic and the Black Knight (just kind of boring all around) - Despite my gripes with the story (Merlina wasn't nearly as fleshed out as her unique anti-villain status deserved, which ends up severely undermining the ambition of the plot in more ways than one, and the other characters go from being useless yes men for King Arthur to being useless yes men for Sonic), I will admit it provides interesting insight into Sonic's character.

- Like '06 and Secret Rings, the ending is very nice... well, aside from Amy being an unreasonable bitch ala Sonic X at the very end.

Sonic the Hedgehog 4 (apathetic) - The admittedly few new concepts sprinkled within had promise. They may not have been as fleshed out as they could have been, but level concepts like Sylvania Castle and White Park, bosses like Egg Serpentleaf and the Egg Heart, and story beats like the Death Egg mk.II being powered by Little Planet, all could have been brilliant had they been better executed.

SatAM (apathetic outside of SatAM Robotnik-related grumbling) - I'm not a fan of the environments on the whole due to them looking too bland or samey, but there are some exceptions that look pleasant or interesting, like the Void.

Sonic Underground (apathetic) - The character designs make me feel better about myself.

- Does "large quantities of unintentional meme material" count as a positive?

Sonic X (mostly apathetic outside of Eggman's handling) - Helen was a better human character and audience surrogate in her one focus episode than Chris was throughout his entire runtime.

- Actually, most of the human characters not named Chris were legitimately likable. Including everyone in Chris' own family not named Chris. Hilarious.

- Despite arguably having the most Chris in it, I actually don't mind the first season that much, partly due to slight nostalgia from seeing it on TV when it was new, but mostly because Eggman actually acted like a villain for the most part, and certain other characters weren't quite as flanderized yet. It's season 2 and onwards where things started going off the rails IMO. (Incidentally, Helen's episode was part of season 1...)

The Boom franchise (apathetic) - Along with Chronicles, the games provide yet more proof that just because someone isn't SEGA/Sonic Team, that doesn't mean they're automatically more qualified to handle the series.

- The show had some good episodes here and there, and Tails' characterization was probably the most consistently on-point out of the cast.

- Despite not exactly being favourite portrayals for either character, even I'll admit that many of Knuckles and Eggman's lines in the show on their own were genuinely funny.

Archie Sonic (pre-reboot is mostly terrible, post-reboot is mostly... bland) - Whenever I doubt myself as a writer, I think back to Ken Penders, and suddenly I'm filled with a lot more confidence.

Sonic the Comic (apathetic) - Fleetway isn't a comic I tend to recall much of aside from how much of a loathesome cunt Sonic is, but IIRC, Robotnik's portrayal is pretty good. Different, but good.

IDW Sonic (stop pissing me off, comic) - Putting their handling aside (and being too obviously "inspired" by MGS in the latter's case), Tangle and Whisper are good characters IMO.

- Same goes for Starline, before he was killed off-screen and replaced with Toothpaste Snively.

- Execution aside (noticing a pattern?), the zombot virus was a fine concept on its own and an interesting new scheme for Eggman.

- I get to remind myself that I've never drawn scat edits and posted them publicly on Twitter.

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dailycharacteroption · 3 years ago

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Deity Drop 1: Erastil

It’s taken some time to get to, but I’m finally taking a look at Pathfinder’s many deities, which spans not only the core deities, but also those that are not as popular in the Inner Sea Region, but have relevance outside of that geographical expanse, not to mention various demigods that have their own niche followings.

Throughout these entries, I’ll give a summary of the nature of the deity, as well as more specific details that seem relevant, as well as their granted abilities in both first and second edition Pathfinder. (As well as details on how they fit into Starfinder, or might fit into it, since many deities that were relevant in the quasi-medieval period of Pathfinder lost relevance and attention in the far future.

In any case, let’s start with Erastil, also known by the epithet “Old Deadeye”.

The lawful good god of hunting, farming, trade and family is typically depicted as an aged ulfen man in trapper’s gear with antlers growing from his head, or as a humanoid with the head of a stag, and is the patron of those that seek to preserve a simple, organized life that ensures survival for the community and a future for their descendants.

Indeed, for the most part, Erastil is a pacifist, he and his followers only raising their hands to protect, rather than to go to war. Even still, both adventurers that follow his ways and the worldly alike know that such is not always possible, for evil and the misguidedness of civilization are not content to leave well enough alone of simple folk.

For those that see the value of simple pleasures, Erastil is an excellent god, but his more personable teaching style, speaking to his priests as one would to a younger member of the village, rather than as a distant and imperious god, reveals that his is a bit of a stubborn old man, viewing most other good gods as children with their priorities a little off center, what with their interest in civilization or flighty exploration and the like.

Stepping back outside the setting itself, this gets a little iffy as it is implied that Erastil really doesn’t get folks that do not pick a significant other with the intention to eventually start a family and have kids (i.e., a significant portion of the LGBT+ community). However, in 2nd edition, he’s been revised to be more open to such things. After all, adoption and being part of the community are just as important as siring a new generation.

Of course, we couldn’t talk about the down-home family man god without mentioning his wife, Jaida, a goddess of agriculture that sadly fell out of favor with the fall of the Azlanti Empire, but is very much still around.

Regardless, if your character is lawful and/or good and comes from a small village, it’s quite likely that they might at lest know a few minor prayers to Erastil, if not actually worship him.

As a lawful good deity that dwells in Heaven, Erastil’s most common servants are various archons, as well as celestial versions of his favored animals i.e. deer, elk, and every other sort of cervine. These two come together in his servitor outsiders, the horned archons, who resemble humanoid deer, and not only hunt evil and protect the wilderness of Heaven and beyond, but also range far afield into the other goodly planes, and are thus more understanding of the less lawful planes than most archons. His herald is a massive hybrid of elk and plant life called the Great White Stag, while lesser unique servants include Arangin the celestial horse, Blackfeather the shapeshifting avian archer, Proudsnout the divine boar, and Scorchbark the brash but goodly arboreal treant.

In first edition, his domains are Animal, Community, Good, Law, and Plant, with his subdomains being Archon (by way of either good or law), Education (by way of Community), Family, Feather, Fur, Growth, and Home. All of this making him quite popular with goodly characters that have an interest in nature, community, or both.

By comparison, Erastil’s 2nd edition domains are much simpler, being earth, family, nature, and wealth, as well as occasionally duty. Also he grants his clerics access to true strike, wall of thorns, and tree stride spells. Old Deadeye having domain over the element of earth isn’t much of a stretch, but it’s clearly there because they needed to fill him out since he’s a major god and morality-themed domains aren’t a thing in this edition.

It would be remiss to not also talk about Erastil’s deific obedience and boons. The ritual to maintain this obedience revolves around the planting of seeds that can survive in the local soil, preferably those of edible plants, though if no such soil exists, placing seeds or useful survival materials in a place where travellers may find it see them marked by Erastil’s symbol, and make use of them. The basic reward for doing so blesses the worshiper with guidance in their own efforts to survive.

Meanwhile, those that go further and take greater blessings for their obedience gain the following. Evangelists gain spells to heal and protect; the ability to summon an animal ally or a twin duplicate of their animal companion; and supernatural accuracy and lethality with a bow.

The exalted instead gain the ability to communicate with, befriend, and summon animals; summon a pair of hound archons; and summon forth a bounteous divine feast that provides greater benefits and forges greater bonds between allies.

Finally, Sentinels gain spells that enhance their archery in various ways, such as improving accuracy over long distance or enchanting them with flame; enhance their leather or hide armor and draw power from the animal that it was made from; and a rare bond to communicate with plants, gain sustenance from sunlight, and immunity to the poisons that make certain plants impossible to eat.

As far as Starfinder goes, Erastil isn’t mentioned, but I imagine that while his worship isn’t mainstream in the Pact Worlds, he still has his followers, particularly in civilizations and species that reject advance technology, or those who live on frontier worlds surviving on local materials and what little they can make themselves.

That does it for today. There are still a few things I didn’t touch on like Erastil’s paladin code or the divine fighting style feat and how it applies to him, but I hope you enjoyed and found this breakdown interesting nevertheless.

#pathfinder #deity #erastil

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popculturebuffet · 2 years ago

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Restocking the Buffet: Of Reporter Cats, More WBD Tomfoolery and Karate Kids

Hello all you happy people. So i've tried multiple times to find a consitent format to talk about stuff that's not this blogs normal structure (i.e. reviews of various media), trying to do just updates for the blog , smaller movie reviews, all kinds of things.

So instead i'm reintroducing restocking the buffet, what was intended to be how I did updates, but now is that plus whatever's on my head, as the shockingly massive popularity of my post railing against Warner Brothers discovery made me realize a lot of you LIKE my ranty stream of concious thoughts and opinons so there they are. Some are angry, some are less so, and some are just plain confused.. and starting off with the latter..

Warner Bros Discovery II: The Search for More Money WBD has thankfully been mostly quite these past few weeks, which is good. I barely can manage the stress of having anxiety and depression, I don't need a large major corporation essentially poking me with a stick and saying "Is this making it worse, is this making it worse, is this making it worse?".

There's still some news on that front. For starters their CFO was quoted in an article saying he really dosen't care about exclusivity just what makes them money.

With WBD having let Amazon stream The LOTR films in time for the Rings of Power which I dont' really care about. Do like the Peter Jackson OG Trilogy though, watched the second two in theaters and feel their excellent, still gotta read the books.

And honestly... it's the only time since the merger WBD has made sense in a way that dosen't make me want to shirtlessly chop down a tree to sooth my shattered Soul Ala Bill Murray. See he kinda has a point about JUST keeping a property or film to your service that isn't an original from said service just to make people buy the service. Sure i'm sure some people would've tuned into HBO Max just to watch the movies for it, but most fans that hardcore would just buy the films somewhere already or likely already have all the editions for these films and the animated films and know all the words to "Where there's a whip there's a way". There's no harm in letting two services hold the ring of power. Granted I do feel this is in part because WBD is run SOLEY on profit and not artistic integrity of any way shape or form, so it could be troublesome down the line, but two services having the same film dosen't really hurt them and hasn't. Hulu and HBO Max and Disney+ have shared films due to lingering lisecnding deals, but people will likely just watch the film on what they have avaliable. So I support this philosphy, I just want it in the hands of people who aren't using it to try and justify scraping content off the platform to have more money to swim in.

That said there was something horrible I found out as turns out there was a cameo for a kid with a fatal disease in Batgirl... whose parents now want her to be able to see it. Just when I thought it couldn't be worse.. jesus. Not much more to say but anything I can do to shame WBD more helps.

We also have the news that the Batman: Caped Crusader is getting shopped around. Sadly unlike Kevin Smith excellently suggested, Disney seems uintrested, but I did see this coming: Disney dosen't want brand confusion and also dosen't quite need it: They have a superhero show every few months, and almost every marvel cartoon ever, including two i'll talk about in a moment. That said the other names in the fight are interesting: Netflix, Amazon and Apple TV+. ANY of them would be able to give it a good home: Netflix is killing it in mature action animatoin and thus Batman would be right home, Amazon likewise, and Apple TV+ has exactly two animated properties (Central Park and the various Peanuts things) of note, so they could use this. And all of them still give WBD a fine and hardy fuck you, so i'm fine

FInally we have rumblings that Comcast may buy WBD. I'm. .iffy on it. Part of it is that one of their branches, Universal has been excessively shitty lately when it comes to YouTube and a certain channel (more on that later). Another is we really don't need more corpprate mega mergers. That said if it dosen't happen while i'm not thrilled about it, ti's still obviously better than the alternative and Peacock is finding it's footing, doing more day in date releases or next day releases than ever for it's tv shows, and is honestly doing better at the day and date streaming than HBO did, actually asking creators as far as I can tell with most seeming to be their decision or have their consent (If i'm wrong or missed one feel free to tell me) and while I still FULLY love and support seeing films theatrically, Streaming does make it easier to see some. Peacock also hasn't abandoned the 45 day window, which WBD did. I'm also okay with it if it happens as frankly at this point Discovery is selling warner for parts. The biggest danger of one of these mergers, as i've realized afte rsomeone called the disney fox merger and I realized, x-men getting to go to the mcu aside, they were right, is that a lot of projects might get canceled and reboots put in cryo. But given the current owner is canceling thigns, making shows unavaliable and generally being a dick, it's really no diffrent except those properties will likely come out of the box and they'll at least let full movies and stuff you know.. get released instead of trying to write it off for taxes. I don't WANT this merger, but it's sad when another megacorp rising is somehow a good alternative.

Disney+ Gets MOST of the Spider-Man!

Moving on from something infurating, we have some good suprising news; Spectacular Spider-Man and Spider-Man: The New Animated Series are coming to Disney+ in october!

This is also one of the omissions from the service that made some sense instead of just Disney going can't make me dont' wanna: Sony owned the rights to these two, and thus tried keeping them to Crackle and other services, and recently put Spectacular on netflix, likely as part of the two being friends now. Which is fine by me as it means I can watch Bullet Train again over and over when it comes to the service and watch the Invitation when it comes out and Watch Morbius out of morbid curosity without having to pay extra money to say keep Starz or buy a dvd that would curse my house. I'm happy to realize this deal exists even if finding it out via a failed vampire movie starring a Cult leader was the weridest way I coulda.

As for why this is a big deal it means that Disney+ is now ONE series away from having all the animated spider-man shows under one roof, two from having all of them (three if you count electric company, but I could see them just getting the rights to put just the spidey skits on there). The 60's and live action series are both missing for whatever reason. I geinely do not know, though I assume with the former it's the same kind of weird type of rights hurdles that have kept the 87 turtles from streaming (Which is frustrating if say, you've only saw a few episodes and would like to watch the one turtles series you haven't seen a good chunk of without paying money to own the series as you already own some of the dvds (Ponits to self).

I never honestly expected either series to come to D+, but i'm excited they are. Only season 1 of spectacular is, but I highly doubt it'll just one one for long and it could be a misprint for all we know.

So breaking both down for the unintiated: Spectacular is one of my faviorite superhero shows period. Granted I procastinate on those a LOT (as evidenced by the fact i'm horribly behind on doom patrol and haven't watched the much loved Harely Quinn), but it's still a classic to the genre, a clever reinvention of spidey's career that manages to take the same concept of pre-miles ultimate spidey (telling peter's early career with a modern bent) and do it even better, taking a page from the 616 and the Ultimate universe to craft something intresting well thought out and sadly short lived. It's also where Gwen Stacey being into science, something ASM codified and has kept with the character since, came from. I intend to fully review it someday, either as a season or in the various arcs wiseman cleverly packed in to make it easier to put on dvd. Check it out. It's a short binge and a worthy one. I also find it enjoyable two of Greg Weisman's two season classics (in gargoyles case one I need to see badly and yes there's a third but he wasn't involved so ... yeah two seasons), are on the same platform. Maybe we can get Gargoyles Meet the Spectacular Spider-Man Marvel? Eh Eh?

The New Animated series i'm less familiar with, having watched it once or twice when i'm younger, but is intresting enough that I want to check it out. NAS was based directly on the first Rami Film, being a sequel to it that takes it's own path.. and also actually turns Curt Conners into the lizard. Fancy that. Being the only spidey property based on one of the film series for now makes it something unique, a time capusle for the character and something fun to check out. It also has NPH as Peter, a great choice.

All this gives me the idea for a possible spider-man month at some point as he has tons of shows (and of course comics). Let me know if you think that's a good idea. I'd love to do it!

Real Dead Meat So we pivot next from some really good news to something that's been consitently frustrating, heartbreaking and obonoxious.

So as i've made no secret of i'm a huge fan of the Horror Review Channe Dead Meat. I've used their gifs..

And ocasionally used one or two of James catchphrases as a refrence.

In case your curious Dead Meat is a channel that has two primary series: The flagship Kill Count where the energetic, joyful and snarky James A Janeese breaks down a film, giving us analysis, cool behind the scenes information on the film, and lots and lots of jokes. It's sister show is the Dead Meat Podcast, where James and his Wife Chelsea (who runs said podcast) discuss horror films or subjects pertaning to the genre. Both shows are excellent and worth seeking out and some of my faviorite things to unwind to. I can't tell you how much i've watched certain kill counts. The counts ar einformative while still doing what the title says, and since his return from a hiatus (having his editor and now co-writer Zoran take over to review tremors and Chelsea also getting a shot with the american psycho films), has stepped it up in even the counting, with comparisons to other films that have been counted, the franchise and other fun stuff.

So naturally I was really amped when James decided to revisit one of my faviorite horror franchises and one he loves and appricates as much as I do Child's Play. James has as of last year (which is also when I found the channel ironically enough as I assumed it was just litterally counting kills. I feel bad I ddin't realize it wasn't sooner as I was missing something dope) started Re-Counting films he did in the first year or so of the series, as the early reviews didn't have the behind the scenes stuff or as much analysis of the films themselves, and he wants these films to get the proper treatment, Especailly Chucky and the due to be re-counted Scream as their two of his faviorites (and as we've established two of mine).

After the first two though thigns went from great, getting two counts a week... to REALLY fucking frustrating and horrible. As almost anyone who watches a content creator or has been one on youtube can tell you their copyright system sucks dirty ass in thunderstorms, being VERY slanted towards corprate intrests and making it a nightmare to run up that hill run up that building to refute claims. MAKING A CLAIM, is childlishly easy and more oftne than not automated. Fighting them can take weeks, and if their claimed it means no revune till it's resolved if it can be.

EVERY Child's Play and Chucky Film since has been claimed like this by the dickheads over at Universal. It's extra baffling because they parntnered with Shout Factory's Scream Factory imprint to do cool fancy new blu rays/4ks of Childs Play 2 and 3 and sent James those early so he could use them for the re-counts... and despite being endorsed iwth review copies this STILL fucking happens. Said counts are there to hype up Season 2 of Chucky, to ACTIVELY PROMOTE THESE FILMS NOT REPLACE THEM, and even when he dosen't like a film like CHild's Play 3 he still credits the good parts. Hell having the behind the scenes bits from the dvd means more people might buy these new versions.

The reason I feel the need to rant about this as thanks to twitter i've had to watch two creators I enjoy who as far as I can tell are some of the nicest people on the interent feel defeated and beaten down by a company whose bullying them for free promotion. And i'm not saying go scream at universal: as james himself said it's a big company: one hand likely dosen't know what the other is doing, to the point two diffrent hands made copyrights on some of the counts.

But I do want people to know about this, to watch these counts as they come out so their work pays off (You can find it just by googling dead meat), to help promote them since doing so for something they geninely love has caused them a lot of pain, and to get my rage out about this as it's likely going to be something James has to grapple with till the recounts are finished. It's not going to get much easier, so i'd like to send my best to a man who has done nothing but try to make people laugh, get them informed and hang off the bars in his new professionaly made set like a monkey, his just as warm and talented wife, and the whole dead meat crew. I'm sorry you guys have to put up with that. If your looking for a count to start with i'd recommend the Child's Play recount, which keeps a few jokes but mostly has a ton of great brand new jokes and content highly praising one of my faviorite horror films.

youtube

Seriously check these guys out, and hopefully this situation will get less obnoxious so james can get back to

As usual

Breaking Cat News

Finally I just wanted to gush about something else I like that isn't getting clubbed over the head: Breaking Cat News

BCN is a brilliant, decently long running and now as of the last few years Syndicated strip by Georgia Dunn, part of a wave in the last few years of brilliant new strips like Crabgrass and Rosebuds. I thought once in a while I could just spotlight what i'm reading righ tnow to help more people read it and full review it later.

As you can see BCN follows three (later 4 cats) who live in an apartment in a big pink house and report on the things that really matter like strange company, the leaves trying to kill us all every year, fuzzy new toilet covres making a great cat bed, horrible new cat food that's good for you, and that strange cat outside who won't go away, and MANY more.

It follows three good boys: Elvis, a cranky old siamese who flies into rages at the drop of a toy mousey, Puck, a kind, gentle good boy who while scared of company is the voice of reason of the trio, and Elvis, a white cat who can blend in with his surroundings and frequently runs around and breaks things and acts like h'es in the middle of a sugar high 80% of the time. They live in said house with The Woman, a kind and somewhat anxious nerd based on Georgia herself, The Man, an often annoyed by his cat children and somewhat snarky but still deeply kind and lovable husband to the Woman, and the boy and girl, the couple's children who the cats are ocasionally annoyed by but just as much doted on, especially by elvis who seems himself as more of a dad ot them than their actual dad. As you can tell the comic is mostly autobigoraphical, following various real incidents through our heroes eyes.

That isn't to say the world isn't deep as Dunn also incorpeates her upstairs neighbor, her best friend, and their various pets into the mix, giving the strip a decent sized continiutya nd a wide bench of supporting characters: We have Sir Figaro and Tabitha, the two spanish language reporters who live above our heroes, Tommy, a cat who at first annoys our heroes (patciually elvis) by showing up outside their window but later becomes their field reporter, Sophie, Tom's shyer artistic roomate, Beatrix, a cute kitten and former intern to the group living at a bookstore and serving as their fact checker and social media gal, Bert, the sometimes stoic patient barn cat who does their av, Baba Mouse, a cranky but wise old barn cat, The Robber Mice, a girl gang of Rodents, and most recently and adorably Goldie, a stray who heartbreakingly was simply left out by her family who moved without her and clearly didn't treat her well (As I found out recently 3/4 of the cats are rescues with Puck having had to be taken from his owner by a well meaning neighbor lest a leg infection kill him (and thus only having three legs, a detail i'm shocked I never noticed until it was pointed out to me) and Elvis being kept in a closet, catching a fever and sadi fever leaving him deaf. She quickly adapts, is warmly adopted and after a while becomes the station's investgative reporter. It's a fun, wonderful strip and I highly recommend it. Read it and thanks for reading this

#breaking cat news #hbo max #disney+#dead meat #netflix #news #Youtube

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platoniclokiimagines · 4 years ago

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All the Avengers a lil iffy with Loki after IW, but Loki meets Jane, and Valkyrie again and they fucking sprint to him and squish him in a hug and everyone’s confused cause... dangerous murderer Loki is getting hugged, and having his hair pulled by Bruce and just... ugh??? Fluffy stuff. Making dinner together. Group cuddles. Helping Bruce with his dumb science stuff. Ugh. Please

WC: 1417

Rating: G

TW: none

A/N: Each idea you posed made me So happy that I couldn’t just pick one to focus on so this is just a hypercut of each of these moments fleshed out a teeny tiny little bit. Also this is just a Complete AU in which the snap Did happen but afterwards was just Different mostly because I don’t want to deal with having to figure out the logistics of my own au l o l. But I hope you enjoy it~

It was shortly after the events of the Decimation that youjoined what was left of the Avengers. The team was in all but rags aftereverything that had happened, and you, left with no one else to go to with yourpowers, had sought out the Compound and pled your case, and since they’d beeneffectively cut in half in number, they’d let you stick around withoutquestion.

The first few days afterward had been the hardest. Everyonewas still in shock, and in various stages of mourning what had happened whilealso worrying about the unknowns. Tony, Strange, and Peter and the rest of theGuardians were in space, and no one had any way to contact them to see if theywere okay, so no one knew who, if any of them, were alive.

You weren’t the only one that had joined up with the group.A lot of old friends of some of the Avengers had sought them out, as well,seeking something familiar in the chaos the world had turned into. Thisincluded people like Jane Foster and Erik Selvig, and a bunch of other peopleyou’d never heard of before anything had happened. And once the refugee shipshad managed to make it to earth, Valkyrie was around, as well, doing what shecould to try to drag Thor out of his guilt-spawned depression.

Everyone was just trying.

But no one expectedthe day that Loki appeared out of thin air in the middle of the living room.

It had taken everyone a second to realize what they were looking at, when it happened. Loki didn’tquite look like the Loki they knew, or the one you had seen on the televisionall those years ago when the Chitauri had attacked New York. Loki looked sick,and weak. Their clothes were tattered, they looked like they hadn’t seen thelight of days in weeks, and they hadthe most horrible black and purple bruises around their throat.

It had taken a solid minute of staring before people startedreacting, the entire group split between looking surprised to see them andlooking ready to fight them.

“…we thought you were dead.” Steve was the first to speak,voice calm, but demeanor showing that he was ready to punch Loki, if necessary,and most of the original Avengers that were left looked the same, save forThor, who looked like he wasn’t sure if he was hallucinating.

But before anyone else could say or do anything, Loki wasall but tackled by Valkyrie, so forcefully that they gave a startled little “oof”in response.

“You’re a right idiot, you know that?” Val’s annoyedresponse was betrayed by the waver in her voice, and the way she practicallyclung to Loki.

No sooner did she let go of them enough to give them spaceto breathe than did Loki become engulfed in another hug, this time from, of allthe people you expected would want to hug Loki, Jane Foster.

“You’re still a jerk for whatever happened on Svartalfheim,but I’m glad to see you back.”

Loki managed a weak, raspy little huff of a laugh. “Iseverything everyone says going to be preceded by something mean, then?”

“Well, I’m justhappy to see you,” Bruce stated as he approached Loki, and rather than offer ahug, he just smiled, and awkwardly tugged Loki’s hair in a gesture you couldonly assume was meant to be affectionate. “You look like you’ve seen betterdays. And could use a nice bath.”

Loki laughed again, a little more genuinely, though stillstrained. “…and a doctor, if you wouldn’t mind?”

“Well, I’m not that kind of doctor, but I’ll see what I cando.”

Bruce stepped back a bit, then, and nodded, but in the nextsecond, Loki had been lifted from the ground in what looked like an absolutelyspine-crushing hug from Thor, who was somehow both laughing and sobbinguncontrollably.

He didn’t say anything, but really, he didn’t need to, andeveryone just watched in silence, with varying levels of confusion at thesudden and strange turn of events.

“…several of the people in thisroom have some explaining to do right about now,” Nat finally declared, and forthe first time, in a long time, everyone in the room laughed.

~~~~~~~~~~

It took several months for Loki to make the closest to afull recovery that they could. While everything physically had been healed,mentally Loki was still extremely troubled, and their vocal chords had sufferedpretty extensive damage from being crushed by Thanos, resulting in a change oftheir voice that really only went noticed by those that had been closest tothem.

But every day, they were healing.

You and Loki had become fast friends. You had always feltlike an outsider with the rest of the team, and it was obvious Loki felt thesame, and the two of you had found solace in your shared distance from thegroup, and the two of you did almost everything together that you could manage.

This included, much to the eternal excitement of the rest ofthe team, cooking together.

You’d helped Loki learn to cook as a way to cope morehealthily with some of their self-deprecating thoughts and tendencies, hopingthat, with having something to do for others, it might help Loki feel betterabout themself sometimes, and it had really worked a treat. Loki just had a wayin the kitchen that even you couldn’t match, despite teaching them everythingyou knew, and the two of you working together was just a different kind of magic.

Everyone always lovedwhen it was your turn to make dinner for the group, as the two of you were, asdeclared by the rest of the team, simply the best cooks out of the entirety ofthem all, and thus that meant dinner would always be better.

And you had to admit, it felt good to be gassed up all nightwhile you were both in the kitchen, and everyone else was excitedly setting thetable and pouring drinks and getting ready to eat.

And you knew that Loki, though they never showed it,secretly enjoyed the positive attention, as well.

It was just niceto be appreciated and wanted around, something you knew Loki had neverexperienced much of.

You hoped it would last for along time.

~~~~~~~~~~

One afternoon, when you and Loki had intended to spend sometime in the training room to work on freshening up the both of your trainingskills, you’d realized you had no idea where Loki was at all.

After checking all of Loki’s normal hiding places, youfinally checked Thor’s room, only to find quite the sight.

While you’d expected, at the very least, Thor and maybe Loki, if you were lucky, you foundnot only them, but Val and Bruce as well, all four of them absolutely cuddledup together on the floor, and all four of them fast asleep.

You didn’t have the heart towake them up, and a nap didn’t sound so bad to yourself, either, so rather thantry to wake Loki and wrestle the group apart, you just settled yourselfcomfortably in the middle of the cuddle puddle, and let the warmth of thedogpile lull you to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~

Another time, you went looking for Loki and were completely surprisedto find them sitting in Bruce’s lab, writing down notes as the two of themworked on an equation that Bruce had written on a whiteboard.

“So, if we look at it from this perspective… Take thatnumber instead of that one, and see where that gets us with the isotopecompound.” Bruce hadn’t even noticed you as he was talking, too busy watchingLoki scribble something down.

“The effectivity rate nearly doubles entirely-”

“Giving us exactly the reaction that we want!”

You had absolutely no idea what on earth they were talking about, but you didn’t have the heart tointerrupt them, so you just stood in the doorway and watched them geek out overwhatever it was that had them so excited, taking the moment to be grateful forhow long Loki had come in the short time since they had arrived at theCompound.

They had been through so much, and had suffered even more,but here they were, making friends and having fun, and being appreciated by theothers.

You couldn’t have been more proud.

#Loki imagine #platonic Loki imagine #Loki #Loki Laufeyson #Loki Odinson #Loki x reader #platonic!Loki x reader #anonymous #ask #answered #fluff #this is Soft #I'm Soft #feat. Bruce #feat. Thor #feat. Jane Foster #feat. Valkyrie

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