#I never do anymore not physically | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mayxo-hxh · 9 months ago

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Im about to get controversial.

Out of chrollo, illumi and hisoka, hisoka is canonically the least likely to flirt to get anything he wants, if at all.

A lot of people think he's a natural flirt but I fear I couldn't have disagreed more. He only "flirted" a single time and that was solely to piss off machi, knowing she'd never agree. Hot take? He would've never asked if he knew she'd agree.

Also, bro's the biggest humanphobe in the anime. He keeps his distance from everyone. The only human physical contact he ever made was through fighting people. (If you're a person thats interested in seeing more evidence, I have an entire long thread about it on twitter that I do plan on posting here soon)

so u cannot give me 1 reason for hisoka to flirt with someone at a random bar but chrollo and illumi? i can think of a few.

chrollo, he already canonically flirts to get what he wants. straight up goes on dates gets a suit and shit. he has no reputation among the general public that hes concerned of that isnt the spider. Illumi? He's a manipulator. I HIGHLY doubt he never flirted to get something in his life from people who are too easy to win over. He's someone that wouldn't care what people think of him. He's also anonymous. People have no idea who tf he is anyways. If it affected the zoldyck reputation? Thats a different story.

Hisoka? he would fucking NEVER. Him specifically? HE HAS A REPUTATION. And whats that reputation? That hes an absolute disgusting freak that no one should dare to approach. He kills people. He fights live and makes sure the audience is always disgusted and weirded out by his actions and performances. You look at him and you should immediately look away and pray he hasn't seen you.

So riddle me this. If his entire shtick is making sure everyones afraid of him and avoids him, then why the hell would he get himself a reputation that makes him approachable????

Why would he get himself a reputation that makes you, as a person who only ever heard of him picking people up, want to approach him.

On top of that, I just.. don't see him picking random people up..??? random weaklings that dont even know nen????? he literally treats them like trash that inconveniences his time. You're saying he'd EVER give them the privilege of sleeping with him???

And then you'd say, oh so he'd sleep with strong people! HERES THE THING. Why would he sleep with them..... when he can fight them. Him getting off from fighting comes NOWHERE to actual sex. What people don't understand is that he gets off to killing people and seeing them crumble in front of him when they realize theyre going to die. Torturing people to death. What's... that got to do with like. yknow. actual sex bro 😭😭😭😭😭😭

this turned into a huge rant probably but do you know how genuinely depressing it is seeing a unique character like hisoka that gains lust through FIGHTING and KILLING reduced to. sex addict in fics. Like. be so fucking serious right now. He called himself a FIGHT ADDICT in the manga. Can I see more of him actually spending his time killing and fighting people instead of whatever the hell bros doing with a random npc.

Anyways this is also why I hc him as asexual/demisexual NEXTTTT

#When a fic is so good but they make a hisoka a sex god instead of a murderer. like dear god. Ya Allah. Mercy on me.#can i please get more fics where he absolutely fucking murders people in deranged ways like god (Togashi) intended instead of....#(checks notes) .....sex???#sorry to me this is 1 fanon characterization that i just gag from i cannot physically stomach that shit anymore.#also the way he never touched a single human and is not a touchy person yet the musical made disgustingly touchy with everyone including go #i saw red when i saw that one scene.#thats not fucking hisoka morow thats hekosa pedoro #if togashi wanted him to sleep around he would've so simply and easily made him mention that. Like even leorio said he jacks off.#yet togashi didnt. because HE DOESNT.#HISOKA GET BEHIND ME #anyways asexual hisoka morow canon goodnight everyone #also trans hisoka can we get a little more content of that i know its completely unrelated but pls im starving #i would put the “ill do it myself meme” WHICH I DO I HAVE A DEMI HISOILLU FIC but im so slow at writing fics sobs and throws up #hisoillu #hisoka x illumi #illumi #illumi zoldyck #hisoka #hisoka morow #chrollo #chrollo lucilfer #hxh #hunter x hunter #my post #my analysis

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oh-no-its-bird · 4 months ago

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I asked for a trim and my hair dresser gave me a FUCKING PIXIE CUT I'm so genuinley distraught I ended up crying on the train home

Canceling all of my plans next month I can't let anyone I care about see me like this

#IMMEDIATLEY scheduling an appointment to get lashes I cant physically handle looking this boyish its giving me hives #im currently desperatley trying to see if my hair still curls but I dont. think its long enough for it.#it just does this stupid fucking flippy thing that makes it stick out more #I look like a lesbian but not the kind of lesbian I WANT to look like #all of my favorite outfits are ruined they would not look the same with this cut #the vibes would be undeniably different #i cant be a cottagecore princess anymore the best I can now do is cottagecore maid my power has been stripped from me #this is devistating I will never be happy again #for a few months at least #fuck this better grow back fast I actually dont know what Ill do if every time I look in a mirror I look like That #birds rambles

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dailykugisaki · 2 months ago

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Day 353 | id in alt

Fushiguro can't take care of shit if it don't involve some sort of physical fighting.(Right to left💥)

#dailykugisaki #jjk #kugisaki nobara #fushiguro megumi #People say hes emotionally intelligent to which i will try not to laugh while shaking my head #Fushiguro Megumi is not emotionally intelligent at all are you fucking serious #he gets affronted when met with things he cannot do and its so fucking funny #what being raised by gojo does to you #its just that the fandom has made him into a pillar he is definitely not just because of how he is presented #the strongest thing about him is a technique that will never be truly his and isn't that good if you really think about it #Kugisaki does not indulge in his personality issues because thats just not how she is #like i said before she will never accommodate herself for others because she is physically and mentally not made that way #after everything moreso because she just really dosent have the capacity to do so anymore after mahito and whatever #Fushiguro gets vanilla ice cream because he has dogshit tastebuds

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weezerlvr228 · 26 days ago

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hi fam !!

#weezer #rivers cuomo #brian bell #patrick wilson #mikey welsh #ahhh omg :( i just fumbled so bad socially #and i just need to like. never speak again i feel.#and i’m trying to comfort myself because like. my friend started talking badly about me #and said i only use her to vent which makes me sad because i didn’t think that was true and i try to do sm for her #i made physics study guides for her ; compliment her when she posts ; and post her on my story a lot and always wave to her and talk to her #and i dunno. it makes me sad to think that but i can’t help it; you know? i just need to be alone sometimes and not speak to anyone #and it isn’t like i don’t wanna be her friend ; of course i do but like. it just hurts my heart she doesn’t wanna be my friend anymore #and it hurts my heart so bad and i dunno what im meant to do. and yesterday i had a party #and i said a bad joke in front of the wrong people and i just. accidentally embarrassed one of my good friends and i feel so bad #and everyone js went quiet and it’s just. i feel awful and need to be like. beheaded.#and i try to comfort myself like oh it’s okay. today is a new day. but today i feel even worse about it and there’s nothing i can do #to fix this; like on one hand THERES NOTHING I CAN DO TO FIX MY BLUNDER!!! but on the other hand; there’s nothing i can do and i have left #my imprint in their minds and it’s so bad. i wish i was like. dead or something; yk? like not even weezer can make me feel better and it #sucks so badly . i wish i could just not think anymore and ignore everything in my life. i just hate myself so badly right now ; and i can’t #even be sure that i’m gonna be better cuz i just lack so much social awareness. i wish #i was more socially aware . i just hate when i get too comfortable. i wish i awkwardly sat in the corner and #didn’t speak to anybody the entire night to spare myself from any awkwardness. i hate parties!! i shouldn’t have gone :(#SORRY FOR THR BENT POST I JS NEEDED TO TELL SOMEONE AND LIKE. GET KT OHT YK?#it’s just so. ahhh i hate everything sm rn :( but liek me and the friend joke like that all the time and idk. im just. :( i feel terrible #and i’ve apologized and he said it was okay but embarrassing cuz some ppl looked at him for his reaction #and i dunno. i just feel awful and need to just. focus solely on academics until my brain is fried and i can’t function or something !

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edwinisms · 7 months ago

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question that I could look up but im lazy: do we know (from the comics or otherwise) what charles’ parents occupations were? or their household’s economic status (ie; middle class, working class, etc)? if not, does anyone have any good guesses based on the details we see of charles’ life?

#im obviously also very interested to know what edwin’s family was like since its a complete mystery beyond: probably quite well-off #and canonically emotionally (and physically) distant (steve yockey’s said ‘his mother never touched him with an ungloved hand’ so.)#but charles’ household seems more possible to make inferences on since we see his parents and some looks at their house and so on and so on #from what I can see I imagine his parents are somewhere between middle and working class but I guess it sorta depends on if the school at #that point was private and if so how much it costed to attend. or if it did cost a decent amount to attend maybe charles’ father #paid for it regardless as a way of ‘straightening him out’. it wasn’t a boarding school anymore but it still seemed probably pretty #rigid and catholic #idk. his father looks working class to me and their house seems to mean that way too but what do I know #im an american raised in the 2000s I don’t know shit about england in the late 80s #well at least when it comes to socioeconomic trends and such #rambling #charles rowland #dead boy detectives

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quietwingsinthesky · 9 months ago

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the last unicorn post from earlier has me thinking about the master. that yana is still in there, you know? is still someone he was, if even for a brief flash across the life of a time lord. there’s no way to unlive that life. there are ways to twist it later, sure, to make utopia into hell on earth. but the life was lived. in much the same way that the doctor can remember, can feel, the love he held onto as john smith even as that life is ripped out of his hands. the doctor choose denial and then grief and then to shutter it all away. and so john smith died, and so professor yana died, and the doctor and the master live on. the doctor has done this before, and he lives in orbit around humanity, trying to keep the best parts of them and hold them deep enough to take root (which he can pretend he gets to choose, as a time lord. as a human, it all floods in and can’t be dug back out.) but what about the master, right?

to borrow a turn of phrase: i think there are two time lords left in the universe, and they both learned how to regret.

#regret here meaning less feeling the emotion of actual regret obviously because time lords do not actually funxtion on unicorn rules. they #already get sad just fine on their own. no humanity needed for that.#but i dont know. i just dont think he brushed it off so easily. i think he did a hell of a job convincing himself he did.#and what better way then to twist his own great works and destroy the species he was working so hard to save at the end of the universe.#but what about the knowledge that he *could* be that person. that somewhere in him exists a version that wanted to save people.#a version that is painfully too much like the doctor. even. now is that part worse or better than the human part?#but if past regenerations are ghosts i think yana deserves a haunt.#anyway maybe ignore this one im rambling about nothing here #theres just. i dont know. what if you were the last of your kind and in surviving you made yourself Not Like Them in a way you’ll never #escape.#i mean doctor who is just so concerned with all these plots about hybrids and children of the tardis and clones and What Makes A Time Lord.#but they’re so obsessed with it in just. a very Lore way. is what it feels like. we get brushes of more like with jenny and how she’s #physically a time lord and the doctor denies her that inheritance. a shared suffering…#but me myself im just fascinated with the doctor and the master as the time lords who survived. but they survived Wrong #its. its. children of gallifrey that don’t belong to her anymore. you know?#i dont care if river’s got time lord dna!!! or the metacrisis is physically human!!! i dont care!!! talk to me about what it means beyond #their blood and bones!!! what’s it like to have your sense of self stripped from you like that!!!#what’s it like when so much of you is the shed skin of time lords past. but one of you was human. one of you was painfully *humiliatingly*#human!!!#enough about how much dna you need to count as a time lord. i want to know how much they can mutate until they can’t be recognized as one.#does that make sense?

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kikuism · 7 months ago

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one of gege's hardest pages ohhhhh shibuya gojo you will always be famous.....not a single panel was wasted gege had a point to make and he wasn't playing around. the eye trauma. the pupil covering his face. are you the strongest because you're gojo satoru or are you gojo satoru because you're the strongest. who are you really

#gojo's character writing im crawling onnthe walls im gnawing my fingers off #the last panel godddd look at him he's paralyzed. gojo!!!! the strongest!!! and be can't do a thing in this moment #he never ever hesitated before this. kenjaku knew Exactly where to hit him #when all you are is a weapon and there's nothing left of You anymore. and being forced to confront that reality amid all the carnage #really wish they'd lingered more on this moment in the anime and made it eerie and introspective and haunting #goddd the eye trauma too. esp considering gojo's power is tied to his eyes. who he is—what he is—is tied to his eyes #i know that's just how the prison realm is designed but stilllll #that's why he wears the blindfold right. to keep the sensory information overload at bay #and so this bare bleeding eye feels a physical representation of the six eyes. it's a colossal burden #feels like*#gojo + eye imagery is always sooooooo

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onlyasimp4nobody · 2 months ago

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#I'm sorry I'm behind on asks I feel like it never fucking ends #can't talk to family about it. they worry too much. cant talk to friends about it. they just start giving unwarranted (well meaning) advice #and plus they basically live with me atp with how often they're over helping me fuck do I do?? bother them more??#dude it's embaressing even if it's not chronic shit it's just unlucky shit like how u gonna have an allergic reaction & then seizure same d #idk about therapy therapists scare me. it's not a therapy issue though I'm just tired and in pain all the fucking time #one more person says “same omg” or “well have you tried-” i will start cutting peoples throat and eating their livers #you do NOT know what it's like having to write your own will before 30 like this shit aint right shit aint fair #makes me petty and shit too people who are healthy like can you just fucking suffer why do you get that freedom but not me #it just never ends #like I really fucking hate it when people say “oh you have so much to live for” because no I don't #Not so sound like a right winger gosh dang god fearer but like deadass people focus so heavily on “mental health!!” they don't #realize even if you feel better and get therapy or shit that's not gonna be realistically helpful for anything physical going on in sm #it's a cycle even if you manage 1 thing - the medications cause a 2nd thing #and that's alongside all the OTHER things you take medications for which cause all those other things #it's like multiplying and makes your body slowly deplete but like never quite die. like I know realistically I can just die anyday #and yeah it is getting worse but it's no different because it's not about that #when you're sick it's not just “OMG DYING!!!” it's like. everything else in your life dies.#you can't cook for yourself. you can't clean. you can't move. you can't hang out with people anymore. you can barely work LMFAO.#I'm REALLY close to quitting it's not even funny lmao. cant put clothes on without struggling.#do people not know it's. physically impossible. to even eat sometimes. just vomit it all up or seize.#yeah it does make me petty #rant

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fingertipsmp3 · 22 days ago

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Maybe I did this to myself but it does irk me when people see me knitting and they ask who it’s for and I say it’s for me and the immediate reaction is “you should sell it” yeah… let me spend at least a week’s worth of my free time making an item I like, want, and would wear just to sell it on etsy, making at most a £2 profit on materials and not being compensated for my time whatsoever 👍🏻

#i say maybe i did this to myself because historically i have gifted most of the items i have knitted #because the venn diagram of things i like to knit vs things i like to wear is actually 2 circles that don’t touch #i looove making hats. i HATE wearing hats #also i love making baby clothes but i don’t have a baby and i’m not going to have a baby #however lately i’ve gotten really into knitting socks and i really like to wear knit socks. it’s like the most affordable way for me to get #quality wool socks. and i’m going to be watching my shows anyway. the time will pass anyways #but it feels like people are deliberately making me feel weird for wanting to make stuff for myself and not profit off my hobby #and like i’ve made 3 pairs of socks to gift already because ‘tis the season or whatever. and i’ve started another pair for a friend whose #birthday is in january #genuinely it’s very weird to hear ‘you should sell it’ or ‘oh i want one!!’ about an item i’m making for myself. after 18 years of gifting #or donating basically everything i’ve ever knitted. like i’ve gifted 2 double bed size crochet blankets #everyone i’ve known who’s had a baby has gotten a cardigan or a blanket or hats or all of the above #i spent october making poppies for the church. i’ve never even stepped foot in my village church mind you. my neighbour asked me to help #do you know what i own? that i’ve knitted? a pair of mittens and a pair of socks.#you want some socks from me? alright. that’s anywhere between £6 and £10 for the yarn and that’s optimistic #i’m currently making myself a pair with hand-dyed yarn that cost me £18 including delivery #the needles i use cost me more than £10. time… let’s call it 24 hours per sock #i don’t know anyone with 18 years experience who makes minimum wage so let’s call it an even 600 for my time. tbh #DO YOU SEE how this isn’t a viable side hussle??? i physically cannot charge what my socks are worth #if i like you and you’re willing to wait; socks are free or cost whatever the yarn costs #if i don’t like or know you venmo me £620. and you’re still going to have to wait.#just pisses me OFF when people suggest i make an etsy page and they say it like they’re doing me a favour or giving me great financial #advice. like you’ve seen me sitting here all evening and i’m barely done with the cuff.. do you actually think selling these for £20 maximum #is going to help me out. i’m not selling them. they’re FOR me. i’m making them because i want them #also when my friend’s family was saying this to me and i was like ‘well the yarn cost a fiver’ and they got quiet and i was thinking yeah…#a fiver is the maximum you cheapskates would pay isn’t it. a fiver is cheap sock yarn bought on sale. or yarn that probably isn’t actually #good for socks. like don’t presume to give me financial advice when you’re this out of touch with the market please #next person who asks when i’m going to start selling socks is getting this whole rant in entirety tbh i don’t care anymore #personal #edited to add that i didn’t even get into etsy fees or whether i would even be noticed among the mountain of dropshippers LOL

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phagodyke · 3 months ago

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the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

#struggling to tolerate this one ngl its fucking dire this weekend. i just cant do this man #thr things i would fucking do for attention please. just one person to notice and care in the slighest i feel like im losing my fucking #mind out here how does every single person who has ever mattered to me in my lifr see me in distress and choose to ignore it or maybe they #dont even recognise im ij distress in the first place i dont know whats worse i dont think i hide it well at all im just so done #listen like ultimately its fucking fine. i will get myself through it like ive gotten myself through everything else in my fuckijg life #i dont even feel bad that often these days im doing so so so much better and its so much more tolerable to only have to deal with this #once or twice a week instead of it being a struggle every single day like i dont think i could go back to feeling like that again ever i #dont know how i managed to get througyh it before jesus fucking christ. but i can deal with it i can deal with this #ik ill feel fine tomorrow. its just thr fact im so desperately fucking alone with it that makes it so much worse than it has to be #i fucking hate repression i hate being so incapable of expressing myself that its easier for me to injure myself than it is to talk about #how i feel to anyone i hate being trapped in this stupif fucking torture labyrinth and not knowing how to get out of it and never being #given a single avenue anything to hold onto i hate having to do it alone every single fucking time and when i do try i just freeze out #entirely i cant form a coherent thought my brain enters total fucking shutdown pure static white noise fuzz and i dont know why please #its so unfair i dont think its that much to want a little comfort. just once just for someone to stay with me while i cry it doesnt have #to be more than that i just dont want to be alone like this i just want to feel safe around someone just close to someone just once #and well ill survive without it bc i always have i guess. so far at least. and there are many things im grateful for and i do in general #feel pretty okay my life is pretty good at times even. i feel so pathetic and stupid and ashamed for even feeling like this #but do i have to go my entire life without ever experiencing any kind of real intimacy with another person emotionally that is #i mean physical is nice too and they go hand in hand in some ways but i just want to feel seen and safe over anything.im tired #i feel like i try.but not hard enough i know its all my fault really but i dont know how to try any harder but nothing will ever change if #i dont i cant expect anyone to do anything if i cant rven communicate in thr first place. oh i dont want to think about it anymore #i have a headache from crhing and its not even 8pm ugh. okay. well it is what it is.#ill breathe until i calm down and then tidy up whatever i left in the kitchen and get my work stuff ready for tmr #and polish my boots maybe. and read and go to bed at 9:30 i think. and ill feel fine in the morning #my fault for thinking about it earlier i know i shouldve nipped it earlier on its such an easy spiral to fall into i need to get better #it happens. okay anyway. no cause for concern im good guys. weakly thumbs up at the camera all covered in blood #my period is late actually thats probably all this is lmao. makes sense thinking abt it #cant wait for it to finally start and all earthly desire to leave my body so i never experience pain again amen #.vent #ignore this sorry for being mentally ill im not even that mentally ill anymore so no excuse rly ummmm. bit embarrassing innit.

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thebirdsareafterme · 6 months ago

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RicNation, as optimistic as I am about #ricbull2024, I really don’t think the filming day in Imola is going to about the second RBR seat…perhaps…maybe…it is about the second VCARB seat…as much as I don’t want to admit it. Why else would they be driving the 2022 AT car?

Anyways, I hope for the sake of Lawson, Perez and Daniel’s careers that the filming day goes smoothly and that they base their final decision on solid data (please please please please please sign Daniel for next year, idc where, any contract will do)

#I have never been more stressed about a decision #and dear god pls let Daniel have a seat next year #i cannot do this anymore #it’s causing me physical distress #daniel ricciardo #f1

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shirogane-oushirou · 2 months ago

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no promises anymoooooreeeee i'll appear online when i appear online 😭 every time i say "ooh i think life is almost done being overwhelming!" it. becomes even more overwhelming in the dumbest ways. all i can manage rn when i'm not stressing myself into a shut-down state is staring at the wall while listening to youtube essays + mindlessly crocheting.

i might queue up ppls art and fics w/o commentary in the tags... i want other ppl to see what all of my cool friends have made, but i genuinely can't think right now with this monstrous brain fog. i'm really sorry, just. yeah. maybe i'll think of some way to make it up later!!! once the dust has settled!!!! but until then i wuv u and miss u. smiles.

[venting in tags including familial manipulation and ableism. i. didn't mean to write all of that, thiss was originally going to be a main blog post but. aaaaaAAAAAA!!!!!

also no need for replies or anything, i'd turn them off for just the one post if i could kjsndkn, i just needed to get things out and go eep jsjndsfdn ok bye bye bye bye!!!!]

#goddd my family finds it sooooooo funny that i can't do basic tasks! it's soooo funny that i can't even think of a horror movie to watch #on halloween bc i genuinely can't remember a single one right now. it's soooo funny that i can't take cardboard boxes or #old furniture out of my room without help bc i've physically and mentally and emotionally burnt out for Months.#and me not being able to move shit out after two (2) days makes me a hoarder somehow. and ofc hoarding is a moral failing #and my mom has to give me a stern talking-to about hoarding things... that were. again. in my room for 2 days....#[tbc it isnt a moral failing no matter the reason. life is hard and things happen and it can be hard to get rid of things for Reasons.]#nevermind them making constant snide remarks about me using ugly 'mismatched' desk / storage furniture. bc it was free / cheap? no income??#AND!!!!! i have a couple of new diagnoses. which doesn't change much day to day but it does make my family making fun of me #even more dumbfounding. like. this explains a lot of really scary unexplained symptoms that constantly leave me #housebound for weeks but uhhh haha hehe hoho??? so silly so funny that i'm barely conscious for multiple weeks???#and you can see that i'm getting worse but that makes it funnier??? hmm!!!#also nevermind that i've told them the exact reason why i've been like this (read: them) but that ALSO makes it funnier somehow.#but i also can't say shit bc they're doing something ~nice~ for me (out of convenience + after almost a decade of 'don't get comfortable'#and 'don't decorate this room bc it isn't yours' and 'you need to be ready to move out by x date'#only for the date to arrive and them to pull the 'i never said that. and if i did say it i didn't mean it like that.#and if i did mean it like that i don't anymore.' card. + any big renovations are things they wanted anyway. hmmmm!!#and how i have to do all of the phys labor alone bc if i ask for help i get made fun of!!! and yelled at that i'm doing things Wrong #(hint: i'm following instructions to the letter but. my family knows better than those silly things!! ^^ ))#jfc i sure did rant. uh. yeah. things. are really weird and uncomfy and i feel thankful that i finally can have my own things on display #outside of closets and bins again after a decade?? but i'm also waiting for the other shoe to drop / them to tell me i owe them in #some way??? bc that's how it works. 'i'm doing a nice thing you didn't even ask me for so now you have to do whatever i tell you to.'#meanwhile i can't even maladaptive daydream my way through it bc my brain is soup right now. can't remember basic things abt #my interests bc i've been on negative battery / spoons for a couple of months straight and it's only getting worse.#OKAY TLDR i'm not in a state to do anything until everything irl gets settled. and i'm trying So Hard to get it all over with but there's #only so much i can do in a day before i completely shut down. i didn't even get into the insurance stuff i've been fighting too ughhhh.#so if i show up on here in short spurts -- hi! bye! hi!! i wuv and care u!!! hope youre well mwah mwah!!!!!!! i'll post what i can and then #disappear when i need to recharge. it is what it is. i need to try to sleep now... uh if this post disappears when i wake up.... yeah......#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#vent -

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ratmans-notebooks · 10 months ago

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i have to stop looking at blogs with vile takes im getting so worked up for nothing

#squeaking #'actually its okay for trans men to be excluded from trans spaces because women dont have to like men!!" Huh .#your gender essentialism is not better just cause u specified “trans” before talking about Men and Women #“trans women dont like men and also femicide is a word so therefore trans men should not be allowed around transfems ever”#is not the radically progressive take u think it is #truly incomprehensible to me the kind of shit people will come up with.#What are you talking about. do you live on Every trans person perfectly passes with no obstacles or pushback by cis people Planet ??#1. actually all trans people deserve to share space in the trans coimmunity. so jot that down.#2. there are transmasc girls + transfem boys + bigender people + NONBINARY people HELLO like how are we defining Men?#how are you deciding which trans people are Too Masculine and which of us are Just Masculine Enough answer quickly #3. do you REALLY think transmascs are just excluded from any experiences with misogyny. think real carefully now.#is the expectation from my parents to get pregnant suddenly Not Misogyny since i identify as ftm?#do the constant reminders that i would never be good at physical activities due to Being a Girl when i was 10 not count anymore-#-because at 15 i realized i wanted to have a cock?#be fucking serious.#there is this constant idea that trans men automatically gain all access to cis maleness #and face NO oppression for their proximity to/or percieved womanhood #(like. ur really gonna look a 5'2 teenager with birthing hips and b cups and a round face and a high voice he has Male Privelege.)#and it leads to us being pushed out of both womens AND trans spaces #it is a lose lose for us. everywhere #it is starting to get fucking exhausting #transandrophobia #negative

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sir-walton-goggins · 2 months ago

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Im quitting work y'all

#i physically cant do it anymore #im in immense pain everyday im destroying myself #the relief of saying “im going home and never coming back” was damn near instant #personal

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halogalopaghost · 11 months ago

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#IM SO STRESSED IM SO STRESSED #I feel like I'm not handling ANYTHING well rn #so many people have symptoms that are WAAAAAAY fucking worse and they're like. working full time jobs and being a parent and shit and #I'm like waaah oh no I have body aches and chronic fatigue looks like I'll have to be unemployed and never do anything ever 💀#how am I gonna live?? like. my parents are taking care of me and I'm so fucking glad but #SOMEDAY THEY WONT BE AROUND and that stresses me out so bad #I'm 25 years old and I NEED my mom every day if not physically then emotionally because I'm a little bitch baby that can't do anything for #herself. im having a hard time feeding myself I'm having a hard time keeping my living space clean #I'm not taking care of anything except the dogs sometimes and my lizard and she's not getting as much attention as she used to #I need a job and I need to be able to suck it up and DO THINGS but I feel like I'm not the person u was anymore #I was strong and I could push thru things and make myself do things and now I can't???? I just lay on the fucking couch!! and feel bad abtit #is it the tism. is it the ADHD. what about the chronic depression. how bout the fibromyalgia?#and the thing is that ALL OF THOSE THINGS ARE MILD #I don't have severe pain (yet).#I just can't handle it I don't WANT to handle it #so. shoutout to my mom I guess because if it wasn't for her I simply wouldn't be alive #I feel like I've never been happy!! why can't I just be content and be happy!!!!#I have no fucking reason to be unhappy!!!!!!

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dazzelmethat · 5 months ago

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Long time no Bud. Wow the last time I made her a ref was 2018. I experimented some with her pallet. Unsure if I like the profile head but oh well, open mouthed anime inspired profile faces are notoriously hard for a reason.

Sigh. What am I going to do with her.. my writing conundrum workshopping in tags. My tag rant mentions plot related suicide and ableism (in relation to the zombie trope).

#my art #my ocs #ft the irises #tw suicide #tw ableism #sh e the yello one. can you tell she's thematically yellow?#as i don't care about 'spoilers' anymore because i'm doubtful i'll ever get to finish my writing stuff i'll just dump my writing hangup her #i think she's probably about 18 here (physically)#beware the in the tags plot includes suicide and ableism (in relation to the zombie trope)#Bud's voice specifically is tricky.. as Vera (the ghost) left her body (bud) when she was 10.#And vera took all knowledge (memories and words and thoughts) with her when she left.#and bud had to start mentally from scratch after rising from the dead. thus being interpreted as a 'zombie' sort of monster #Vera hatess Bud as hate of the self/ hate of the physical/ hate of the unintelligent (vera is in the wrong here. but she's complicated)#((lol can you tell why vera named herself that haha))#i want her to prompt characters/people to reininvestigate how they think of 'brainless zombie' tropes in relation to ableism but--#but i am doubtful of my writing ability and should probably change what i have going on to something less risky #originally when i was 12 and i first made them all bud was purely a chaotic antagonist. and i have def moved past that #12 yr old me expressing my suicidal idealization by having Vera absolutely hate her old body #and bud (formerly xqi for askew iris in middle/high school) being the body that was rightfully thrown away #but now that i'm past that all.. i need to make bud a character that can actually take up just as much importance as the other 3 irises #do i have the writing skills to do that? who knows.. Bud isn't even a 'main character' the way vera is. should i still try?#even if i never wind up trying and this conundrum stops me forever.. at least these blorbos can live in my head u_u #might delete the tag rant later if i feel self conscious enough about it :/#shrugs profusely #any suggestions are welcome. join me in untangling this gordion knot if u want ashdfhasdfjldf

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