#I need to kill him So fucking bad and then he wss like 'well do you have black friends and *slur* friends?'

[23z567]

my biological father is so racist especially towards asians and it makes me sick in the stomach. I got in a fight with him over how he talked about things i dont want to mention but It just triggered me so fucking much I genuinely wanted to slam his head against a wall

[thegreatestheaver]

Conventional nightmares are scary but I think it’s the unrealistic ones that are the most scary

[gronjon44]

OK RANT TIME

This inspired by @ben-10-setting-omnicrom and their Omni-Rant so bare with me.

I've always seen way too much flak being flung at Ben 10 so I feel like ranting and sharing what I personally find to be particularly awesome/enjoyable about the series.

First, the art style/animation

Why did people hate the art style so much? Like, I thjnk its the most dynamic thats the series has had do far. It helps the characters look more fluid I think and it just looks really cool. Also i think the character designs get too much flak. I mean yeah they have WAY more green then alot of the older designs do, but cmon. They look awesome.

Next up, the villains.

I absolutely love the villains in Omniverse, both big and small, though for now im focusing on the major big bads for the purpose of this.

- Albedo is put to some of the best use in this show, even if he just becomes a sort of M.O.D.O.K clone. He has good banter when he's around, the ultimatrix is put to better use here then in Ultimate Alien I think, and the fact he remains a more active presence then Vilgax says alot. I'll admit I never saw too much of his inclusion in UA and AF, but what I like about Omniverse is that it still manages to still keep his inclusion so solid that it doesn't feel kike you have to watch the previous shows to understand his motivations as a villain.

- Khybar is by far a fan favorite, and his sheer determination for trying to kill Ben keeps him interesting. Plus he introduces Skurd so that helps (Also the nemetrix is by far my preferred alternative to act as the opposite Omnitrix) I think hes one of the best reacurring villians the series has and, while i acknowledge he has flaws as a character, I think they can be looks past pretty easily.

- Ghost Freak (Zs'Skayr) is put to SUCH GOOD USE. I love the fact that Omniverse went into more detail about his home planet, and they even brought back Dr Victor as an active part of the story. Also was Cujo supposed to be the Yenaldooshi? Cause it always bugged me why he looked so different from other Loboans, including Benwolf and Scout) And yes there's the obvious fact that he has a much more apparent alterations to his design, but I like hoe they tried to make him look more like a Grim Reaper. I think it works and I believe that it can stand well next to the classic Ghostfreak design.

- Malware is hands down my favorite villain. Not only is he voiced amazingly by Corey Burton, who also played Megatron in Transformers Animated, he's also just hands down an amazing villain. Yeah they could've gone more into his potentially sympathetic side, but even still he's so well written, and even has a major part in the first couple seasons of the series. I'm still annoyed at how he wss essentially turned into a suit for Vilgax but nonetheless it doest change anything.

- Maltruant is a great series finale villain, and while i was never a huge fan of Clockwork as a alien or character, I like how they put more focus on the Chronosapiens as a species with Maltruants character. Plus we get more Time Travel antics and while this isn't necessarily a beef I have with Maltruant, I just think this treatment shouldve been stretched out to Eon who, frankly, got sidelined pretty hard outside of his inclusion with Proffesor Paradox. Also last thing, HE'S VOICED BY MARK HAMIL! I SWEAR MARK HAMIL NEEDS TO MORE VOICE WORK AS ANIMATED VILLAINS.

- PSYCHOBOS IS THE FUNNIEST FUCKING VILLAIN HANDS DOWN YOU WILL NOT CHANGE MY MIND ON THIS.

Legit I love everything about Psychobos. His banter with Asmuth and the galvans, the fact he has such a massive ego he could give The Leader a run for his money, and he's seemingly outsmarted by both Blukage and Driba its just stupid funny to me. And like he can actually be a semi threatening villain. When I was first introduced to Alien Force as a kid I loved Brainstorm, just for the fact that he's a super intelligent crab. It just stuck with me.

And this isn't even including the other side villains in the series. Psyphon, Fistrick, Fistina, hell even fuckint Thunderpig, they're all enjoyable villains. Really theres only 3 villains I actually dislike, and thats Vilgax, Kundo, and Eon.

Kundo was just meh to me, Eon I feel like was rather underused outside of Proffesor Paradox (yeah I know I said it twice)

And Vilgax... Vilgax got sidelined heavily, to the point his most interesting inclusions was when a janitor/plumber was mistaken for being Vilgax. And I think this comes from how oversaturated he's become.

He was such a central villain in the original series, up until Sectret of the Omnitrix. But after that I think he was just, kinda overused. Yeah in the latter half of AF and part of UA he was fine, but he just got overused. He's basically a Cthulu version of Thanos with his reputation and all.

This is all personal and I know some people still think he's one of the best villains in the show, and I agree. I just think that he started to lose his touch after the original series ended. Plus, I just didn't like his various redisigns. The tubes and the massive dark armor just stuck with me more.

Tell me, which one looke like an extremely intimidating villain who could slaughter planets? And which one looks like an amalgamation of Thanos, Darkseid, and Cthulu?

Finally, my overall thoughts on the show as a whole and Bens growth throughout it, compared to previous shows.

I think the show does really well for what it tries to accomplish, and I don't quite understand the hate. Yes I admit, it has some rather crude or cringe worthy moments, but it has some equally funny and heartfelt moments,, intercut with some fun and enjoyable action all throughout the series.

And for those who think he's at his worst as a character in this series. How is it compared to how Ultimate Alien essentually turned the Ben we knew from Alien Force back into immature and clueless 10 yr old Ben? The Omniverse interpretation actually has more explanation for his more slacker/relaxed moments.

Like @ben-10-setting-omnicrom said, he isnt just a hero on his own or working with a nonexistent alien government like the plumbers. He's been doing this for so long now its become second nature to him at this point. I like to tbink of him as the "Tony Stark of Bellwood". He's a celebrity and for him, all of this is just second nature of force of habit, so he acts more freely and cocky with situations, because he knows how they'll always play out.

That is to say, he isnt without his mature moments or losses. He loses plenty of times in this show, or he is forced into situations where he can't be his usual cocky self.

When the Incursians invaded earth and he was banished, forced to stay away at the risk of his whole planet being destroyed? He planned an infiltration strategy, executed it with minimal to no issues, and managed to return to earth and save the planet.

When Feedback was erased from the Omnitrix and he was forced into an emotional slump, losing what he believed to be an integral part of his being, what did he do? He grew from the situation, learned to never heavily rely on one alien (for the most part), and he grew to learn form that loss and become the hero he is today.

If he was just an immature teenager who didn't really bother to care for fights or their outcome, shy would he jump headlong first into a literal big bang. He was willing to sacrifice himself and risk never even existing, just to ensure a villain didn't win.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk, I'm gonna go sleep this off now.

[sungieskies]

Demons - I

Demon! Gang! AU

A collab story with @doubleknot42

Summary; lee miso tries to summon a demon, summons an asshole.

Genre; Angst, fluff?

Warnings; cussing, violence

Words; 1.3k

A/N; this is written in second person but when the main character is addressed she will be addressed with The name Lee Miso.

You sat down on your bed, sighing as ypu looked at the book in front of me. It was a book on Demons, you knew it wouldn't do anything but wanted to try and summon a demon. You open the book to the page with the spell on it and read it over before grabbing the candles you needed. You grab your lighter and lit all 5 candles before setting them up correctly.

Once everything was set up, you looked back down to the book. You sigh gently before chanting the spell (Im lazy so I'm not putting a spell 😂). You squeaked as all the candles suddenly went out and ypur mirror cracked. You closed your eyes after seeing everything happen and sat there shaking. You thought nothing was going to happen so when something did, your bad bitch persona left and you looked like a scared puppy instead.

You opened your eyes once all the noises stopped, thinking everything had died down. You were wrong as right in front of you stood a male in all black, glaring down at you. "You summon me and then act like a child, god I hate people like you. 'Lets summon a demon. This will be fun' well sweetheart i have something to tell you, this isn't fun for me. You are interrupting my damn work." The male spoke, his voice deep and dark. You sat there dumbfounded as you had actually summoned a demon and the first thing put of the demons mouth is trash talk.

You slowly stood up and looked at him before making the bold move to try and touch him. The male tsked and teleported away to a corner of your room. "Don't fucking touch me..." He growled out. "I'll send you to hell if you do.." You roll your eyes before trying to touch him once again. You push against his chest gently before squealing as he grabbed you roughly and threw you to the ground, growling as he did. "Look Princess, learn to listen and shit doesn't happen to you" he spoke before putting his hand around your neck and gripping tightly. You choke and cough, trying to get air. You cry out and scratch at his arms, cutting into him. He hisses and pulls away as he holds his bleeding arm "why the fuck are your nails so sharp..." He says as you get on your knees, coughing and gasping. "You owe me your soul...or I'm killing you." He growled out. You nodded, not even thinking about what he said since you were still light headed.

He laughed at you "stupid girl...you are now owned by a demon..." He said as he gripped your hair and started whispering something but you passd put before hearing it all. You woke up and looked around, you were in your room but something felt off. The mirror was fixed, your closet was suddenly full of nothing but black and white clothes and you felt empty. You got up and walked to the door, going to open it. Once it was open You were greeted by unfamiliar faces. One of them came up to you, he looked familiar and then you saw the bandages on his arms. He was the one from your room, the one who almost killed you. You instictivly back away from him, trying to go back into the room you just came from but the door didn't want to open. He got closer and close to you and eventually you could feel his breath against your cheek. You whimpered and started shaking as you were finally scared of him.

"So it really takes me dragging you to hell for you to be terrified of me? Pathetic..." He spits out before grabing your arm. You scream before feeling a hand hit your mouth and cover it "shut it..." He growls. He then pushes You back into the room and to the bed. "You stay in here...no body knows you-" he was cut off by another male, skinny and much taller than the one infront of you. "Changbin who the hell is this? Why do we have a human here?" The taller one asks. "Goddamnit..hyunjin just leave. Now!" The one holding you to the bed, now known as Changbin, yells out. You watch then scared and your shaking never stopped. As Changbin turned his head, you were passed out once again. He sighs and leaves the room to deal with Hyunjin.

When you awoke the second time, you were surrounded by 9 people. One of which gently held you down as you tried to get up. "Don't get up... You have too many needles in you to get up." The male spoke gently. He sounded much nicer than Changbin and you welcomed the calming voice. You laid back down on the bed and sighed softly before your eyes opened wide "n..needles?" You ask softly "for what...?" You continue with another question.

"You're Lee Miso aren't you? You have a ton of medication that you take so I'm making it easier on you and giving it through an IV..." The male said. You calmed down and nodded "w..who are all of you...?" You asked quietly, your eyed looking around at all the faces. The one taking care of you opens his mouth first. "My name's Woojin...but to make this simple so you don't ask...we are all demons..." He spoke softly as you went to open your mouth, but you soon closed it when he answered your question.

You nodded before your eyes travled to the next male, the youngest looking one. "Name's Jeongin..." He said quietly, his braces making him look even younger. The next one was the one who came into the room while changbin wss pushing you earlier. "Hyunjin" he said as he waved before looking at your neck "damn Changbin...you really did a number on her neck...those bruises are dark..." Changbin rolled his eyes "shut up...she'll live..." He said coldly. Soon enough you had been introduced to all the boys, all of them but Changbin and chan looking concerned about your body. "Why did you bring a human here?" Chan asked as he glared at Changbin. "For one, why the hell are you asking weakling... You're the one who brought the slut here. And for two i took her soul, didn't expect she'd come down to hell with it." Chan rolls his eyes before leaving the room.

You watch him before looking at woojin, he had an apologetic look on his face. "I need to take the needles out..." He said softly. You nod "o-okay..." You said and closed your eyes as he started taking them out. It hurt but it was way less of a pain then changbin trying to strangle you. You soon sat up as the needles were finallt out. All the boys leave besides Changbin, making you really worried.

"Stop being so scared. I'm not gonna kill you" he said as he came over to you. "I'm sorry about earlier but you were pissing me off. Also, this is an exact replica of your old room minus your clothes and belongings we couldn't duplicate. The clothes in the closet are my old clothes..and your laptop is on your desk. Tell me if you need anything..." He said, sounding a lot less mean than he did earlier. You slowly got out of bed after he left the room and you went to the closet to change into something that wasn't the hospital gownesc clothing you had on. As you stripped the dress and your bra off, you heard the door open again. You turn to the door to see Changbin standing in shock as he wasn't expecting to see you without clothes or a bra on. He blushed deeply as did you. You cover your breasts before huffing "what do you need..?" You ask softly. "I..i was just gonna tell youbwe ordered food...so you can come eat..since you have met everyone." He said before shutting the door. You sigh and grab one of the large hoodies in the closet before leaving the room.

[darksouls2yuri]

Jersey Devil okkkk

Im already a minute in I gotta keep up

Smh Scully has a life outside of you Mulder

Shes so miffed lol also her outfit?? Cute

Mulder in the casino who will he call with the payphone

Ranger man is wack

“You know, 32 years.. I see a lot of weird stuff.” Bro you saw a werewolf who just transformed back smh

Its just grug. Grug lives in NJ

Or wait ni its scary were the rats man i hate him jerma scares me he lives in thw oods and haunts me hes gonna eat me i swear

Lmao

He just hits the wall

WhT did you think was gonna hapoen DOG

Dog eat cake. Dog like cake.

Why is scully so pretyyyyyy her clothes are great

OOP

Dana has said Fox is cute bro time

Rob. Scott’s dad.

(Whispering): divorced.

I had hiccupps now theyre gone come back

Mulder is so trusting what if Roger’s friend just vibe checked you in the alley what are you gonna do thats so bad Dana come get ur bro hes so dumb

Ah yes. The drawing. From the jacket he found. The tall man like thing with long hair and the funky pose.

Omg Fox you’re too nice lol

“Hey, they got HBO?” he’s gonna watch shaka zulu or wait was that stars idk shit when did shaka zulu air

Mulder you’re so wholesome 👀👀👀👀👀 its them. The tall man like thing with long hair and the funky pose. Dumpster diving time

(Soft grunting) (sniffing)

He can outrun a horse. Yet he can’t fucking catch up to a wildman.

“Enjoying the beautifyl night life in atlantic city”

I think danno said he’d dumpster dived in atlacnic coty once idk

Elmer fudd

“THE DRUNK TANK???”

I have a date. Can you cancel?

Scully just do it its bro time.

Hell yeah bigfoot lore

Scully we’re not at the top of the foodchain we just fuck shit up

Rulers of the world lmao

Carnivorous Neanderthal thats just waylon our resident football player he fake punched me in the face while i wore a Santa hat and bathrobe

Scott’s dad is boring Scully get up and leave hey im hingry??? Snacc time

Societal norm of having kids being pushed on her >:(((( Scott’s dad needs to leave

“Well, it had all the plumbing”

Scully LEAVE GO GO GO YOUR BRO NEEDS YOU you gotta go also?? OMG BIGFOOT TITTIES IM RIGHT PATTERSON GIMLIN ISSSS BIGFOOT PORN LMAO

Pepto bismol commercials scare me

Skellyman >;)

That coroner looks rly familiar?? Who is he

Why would primates have a natural fear of heights. Chimps like Heights i thought. I have a wholeass VHS tape of Gibbons having fun on a jungle gym

Ponytail man is wacc

COPS

(pigeons cooing)

Why is ponytail man just lazily rummaging lol

Bro ehat if that wss her pad what if you picked up a pad thats so gross bro eugh

Cowboy hatt

“Maybe she spends her day shopping” “maybe we’re just beasts with big brains”

Mulder has no sense of self preservation

His tie is funky

She scamperin

PARKOUR

PARKOUR ×2

(Metallic clanking)

Mulder its dark in there :( bring a flashlight

(Fan squeaking)

OH MY PIZZA

Mulder look out oh no oh god oh fuck

Scraggly

(Quiet, grunty rasping)

ZENDAYA

Scully in her action heels

“You should have seen her. She was beautiful.” Mulder you’re so wack

BUTT

BUTT BUTT BUTT

Mulder’s exasperated face

They all run like Anakin on his way to listen to Sheevy talk abt plagues

Mulder mad.png

“Same reason you kill a rabid animal.” Harsh okay wtf

Neanderthal babies

I’m putting my settings on kill I hate Rob

FRAN, keeper of requisition forms

Bro tiiiime

Road trip to the Smithsonian

FERAL CHILDREN

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Other Matt: like she's always dragging me around and I don't do the compromise.. I wanna eat steak. I wanna eat steak. I never tell her what I want to do, I just say what do you want?

Me: well,you have to be careful you don't push her away. So you say, "babe how about we grill tomorrow. Im thinking corn on the cob and steak"

Jeremiah: that's what you used to do and i thought you were leaving me

Me: because you act like I'm 13 and You're 20 and there is a reason we should not be together. And you would get irritated and then mad.

Jeremiah: oh

Me: so then May be she would day "but I want chicken" well, easy then "babe I'll throw you a chicken on the grill, how do you want me to cook it?"

Jeremiah: shit That's what I didn't do

Me: no, you got mad and made me feel you hated me

Jeremiah: I see.

Other Matt: so what would you do in that scenario?

Me: well... That's why i say the beginning is the hardest because you habe to establish patterns and when they change its a red flag... But for me I was feeling more comfortable with him and he went the opposite way... So it wss really difficult. And obviously we aren't together... But I didn't twk3 his insecurities seriously.

Other Matt: because you had amnesia

Me: yeah... I always left an opening for him to discuss himself but he didn't. And I didnt understand him. So but now I realize I should had been more romantic with him... Instead of being intimidated by his moping and bad moods I should had,tried to seduce him

Jesse's head exorcist spins: do what?!?!?!

Me: yeah.., to me it was already about him, I wanted to be with him i told him,i wanted dinner the next day. But he .., didn't get 8t and his moods were so up and down and crazy I would get exhausted just watching him much less try to interpret, see my ex didnt care how I,felt and i had to kick him out. So I,didn't expect someone that loved me and hurt me Would leave. I would never leave my daughter. I mean, why would he leave me?

A bunch of people: you kicked him out!

Me: I was in an,abusive relationship previously and h3 had more mood swings than I could count.

Jeremiah: she didn't kick me out. I asked her if she wanted me to leave and she said if I wanted to, i could. And I left.

Me: you weren't my prisoner and I wasn't a jail guard

Jeremiah: i asked you the reasons why you would,want me,to and there wss more than two

Me: there always will be. There will be millions of reasons to leave for me to say why you could. Did you ask me why I wanted you to stay?

Jeremiah: no

Me: and im sure that list would had at least one. Love is the greatest gift of all. Pure. Real love. And i can't get that just any where. And all the reasons I said you should leave were all the reasons you should stayed. You cleaned the house. Watched my kid. Had fun. Smiled. Any person would want to leave for those reasons

Jeremiah: why?

Me: May be they knew they were imposters and would become abusive later. May be because they were scared and needed space. May be because they didn't like to clean.

Bill: she's too deep. She's so entertaining I see why no one realized that

Me: or that I wanted to kill myself. I knew like comedians kill themselves.., so I knew no one understood what I was really feeling. And so Bill. I,understand what you're saying

Bill & Jeremiah: does it help?

Me: yeah

Bill: but don't change

Me: I won't. Those are my mood swings. They're just part of Me. Like Jeremiah's craziness makes me a better person and friend. Your love understands me. We talk about deep shit and we laugh. There's not a reason I can't be that with everyone. Except Jeremiah's jealousy

Jeremiah: weeelll, now that you mention it.

Other Matt: those two are stubborn as Hell! That's your biggest problem

Me: it's communication.

Other Matt: oh You're right

Jeremiah: for 14 years she never talked to anyone. Only listened.

Me: I didn't have anything to talk about.

Jesse: did you see what she just did? She closed herself off completely

Me: i had an abusive mom that killed my kids and got away with it. I told people about 911, it happened anyways. And so much more no one listened to. So I quit talking.

Jeremiah: so now are okay?

Me: as much as I hated it And as much as I resented it. The NHRA made a difference in my life that you were unwilling to make. It took thousands of people to do what you could have done by yourself. And yeah, I am okay.

Jeremiah: I am a spoiled brat.

Me: I know.

Jesse: you do what you do and you just blow my mind

Me: I learned a lot only listening for 14 years. Its good for the soul.

Jesse laughs: only you!

Me: I must give Jeremiah some credit had it not been for him knowing you were in trouble and needed help I would not had the opportunity to blow your mind.

Jesse: yeah And so many times I wanted to shoot myself in the head, too.

Me: I'm not surprised. As i wanted to shoot myself, too. Misery loves company.

Jesse: yeah. But you kept me Alive! Kept telling the kids to call me and yeah, they did. It took a lot from you.

Me: I didn't mind. I had not really much else to do. Telling people, reminding them to love and listen

Jesse: and to care

Me: is the easy part. Its erasing the evil tendencies that's difficult. But I was able to. Something I always wanted.

Jesse: yeah then you tell us you wanted to kill your self after

Me: well, now I'm okay. Jeremiah some what came back around. And this, I think, really makes a difference

Jesse: yeah! And I helped by being a bafoon and ass hole!

Me: yeah

Jeremiah: you're a bitch! I can't believe you said that about me!

Me: what? Lol

Jeremiah: that's what Jesse always says when you say something about him

Me: I know. He thinks all the woman want his Dick and he's scared of them

Matt: so hey when are coming over!

Jesse: yall are sick little fucks!

Me: oh it looks like we're in luck, Matthew Hagan!

Jeremiah: you're nasty as Hell!!

Me: yeah And you like it too.

Jeremiah: shut up, dad

Matt: see now you see why she was yelling about people asking other people for advice about her and not asking about herself to her!!!

[boozycow]

Safe and Sound

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: Flangst, depictions of violence and injury

Word count: ~2.3k

Summary: You and Dean recover from a rough hunt. But it isn’t just your wounds that need healing.

A/N: this one kind of took on a life of it’s own and I kinda hate it. BUT T Swift is an absolute treasure trove of inspiration for romantic shit. So this pile of crap was produced. Feedback would be amazing! (Also this isn’t beta’d and is probably riddles with typos, and I’m on mobile so I can’t put it under a cut, I am very sorry.)

Dean grunted and took another swig of whisky as you pressed the sharp needle into his skin. The soft flesh of his shoulder twitched under your small hands as you looped the needle through to create the first of what would be many stitches. There was blood everywhere and the smell of iron and salt made your stomach lurch. It made your heart ache, to know you were hurting him. No matter how many times you did it, it never seemed to get easier.

It had been a normal hunt. Just a couple vamps, something you should have been able to take on with ease. But things had gotten messy quickly. The nest was ten times larger than you had thought and they seemed prepared for your attack. You killed about half before they killed the hostages they’d been holding. You barely escaped with youe lives.

But it had been in the final bout of chaos that you took the most damage. Sam was knocked clean out and had Dean not acted as quickly as he had, he would have been vampire food. Other than that, he was okay, aside from a few superficial bruises. You were worse, though it was nothing serious, just a light gash on your abdomen that stung like a bitch.

The same could not be said for Dean. His nose was bleeding and you hoped it wasn’t broken, though you couldn’t know for sure because he wouldn’t let you touch it. He was ridiculously stubborn at times. But his shoulder was a complete mess. One vampire had taken his blade and embedded it in the muscle. It was deep and jagged and would leave a sacr. Another to add to his vast collection, you thiught wryly to yourself.

You’d managed to get Sam in the car moments before another wave of vamps came for you. Dean was bleeding everywhere and you were too exhausted to fight, so you ran. You drove for what felt like hours before you made Dean pull into a motel. The bleeding was getting worse and your anxiety for his well being was growing with every passing second.

And that was how you ended up sat behind Dean on some crappy double bed in some crappy motel, his ruined shirt discarded as well as your jacket, a needle in hand and a bottle of whiskey being shared between you. He’d been reluctant at first, but your pleading look had convinced him.

He cursed as you pressed the needle into his skin again. Stitches were his least favourite. “Sorry.” You murmured, your heart breaking for him. You reached up to wipe the sweat from your forehead. “I’m almost done.” You tried to reassure him. Two minutes later you completed the last stitch.

“Thanks.” He said dismissively and stood up from the bed. Taking the burning whisky with him, hoping it would numb the pain. He took a seat at the small table, staring at the wall and tapping his fingers rhythmically on the wooden surface, already scratched to oblivion. Although he was hurt physically, it was nothing compared to the pain he felt in his heart. The guilt he felt was eating him alive. Those people’s lives were over and he couldn’t save them. They needed him and he had failed.

What was worse was that he had failed you. He’d let those fucking vamps get their filthy fucking hands on you amd he hadn’t even been able to save you. What the hell kind of person was he supposed to be if he couldn’t protect the people he loved?

And he did love you. Not that he would admit that. He knew if he did, you’d say no, you’d reject him. And even if you didn’t, he’d end up losing you. He lost everyone he loved eventually. And he couldn’t do that to you, couldn’t risk you like that. But fuck, he wanted to. He wanted you more than he could put into words. Maybe one day that part of him would win. He stayed silent.

Dean wss silent as he sat at the table. Usually the sight of him half naked would have had your insides a mess, but you were too tired and too depressed to think about him like that right now. You still wanted to comfort him, though. You knew what he was feeling, because you felt the same. But Dean wasn’t the sharing sort and you weren’t about to push him into talking if he didn’t want to.

You went to stand from the bed to go and clean the blood from you hands and arms as well as disinfect the copious cuts adorning your body, but you never made it to the bathroom. As soon as you were on your feet, your vision began to blur and your head became light. You hit the floor in a second, almost passing out completely. Everything had gone fuzzy. You could barely see and what you could hear sounded like it was being muffled, like there was cotton wool in your ears. Your limbs were heavy and all you wanted to do was sleep.

Dean had been a moment too late. His hands grazed the bare skin of your arms just as you hit the floor, the thud of you weight on the carpet like thunder in his ears. “Y/N?” He shook you gently by the shoulders but you didn’t responde. “Y/N!” He shouted, louder and more firm, but still panicked. You still lay still. His blood began to race and a thin sweat broke out across his brow.

Shit. Shit. Shit. What the hell was happening? He scanned your body hastily. You were covered in blood and sweat, most of it his. Finally, his eyes landes on the cut on you thigh. “Fuck.” It wasn’t that deep but it was enough that it had continued to bleed slowly until you had lost a good amount of blood. He would have to stitch it up. Shit.

Heaving you into his arms, bis own stitches threatening to break, he dropped you on the bed and scrambled for the first aid kit. He would not lose you. He would not lose you.

He felt like he’d been punched hard in the gut. There was no air left in his lungs.

He found the needle and tooth floss you’d been using amd went back over to you.

You began to stir, a sharp pain in your leg waking you from your slumber. You forced your eyes open and saw Dean standing over you with a worried expression. “Dean?” Your voice was barely a whisper.

His eyes snapped up to meet your and immediately his expression softened, though it still held worry. “Hey, Sweetheat. Listen…” he began, sitting beside you as you propped yourself up on one elbow. That had been a bad idea and Dean moved to steady you as you lay back down.

“What’s going on?” Your mind was still mush but there was an ounce of panic sneekimg in.

“You passed out.” He took a breath, as if the words were difficult to say. “You have a cut on your thigh. It needs stitches or you’ll bleed out.” He started threading the needle, never swaying from his task. Not when the stakes were so high. He wouldn’t lose you.

You managed a soft groan before you started to lose consciousness agian. You were almost gone when you felt two calloused hands on your face and Deans voice through the haze. “Come on, Y/N. Stay with me, please. Please, please, come on.” It was panicked and you tried to reach out to him, but sleep was already taking you. Only his name escaped your lips before you lost yourself to unconsciousness.

You woke up in the double bed with sunlight pouring through the window. You ached everywhere and there was a strange pressure around the top of your thigh. There was a pounding in your head, worse than any hangover you’d ever had. But what was strangest was the man laying next to you. Cracking your eyes open, you met his own, watching you.

“Dean?” You questioned, confused, though not disappointed. Waking up next to Dean had often been a daydream you exolored.

Dean released a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. You were alive. He hadn’t lost you. You were alive.

But his anguish wasn’t over. He was relieved but he was still angry, at you and himself. He was still hurting.

“Dean, what’s wrong?” You propped yourself up on one elbow as you watched a single tear escape his eye. He began to turn away from you, but you placed a hand on his cheek to stop him. You didn’t want to force him to talk, but the least he could do was exolain what the hell was going on. “Dean.” You were more firm. “Tell me.”

“I,” he began shakily, “I almost lost you.”

Your breath hitched in your throat. That wasn’t quite what you’d exoected. Dean was rarely one to admit he cared. Your voice was barely a whisper when you spoke, your heart hammering in your chest as you realised the intimacy of the situation. “I’m not going anywhere. Hell, I enjoy annoying you too much.”

A wry smile touched the corners of his lips but it was too quick to be sure it was real. Melancholy quickly took it’s hold again and the guilt rose to the surface. He sat up in bed, staring out of the window. “You got hurt.” He stated matter of factly, paim lacing his voice.

“But I’ll heal. Getting hurt it kind of am occupational hazzard.”

“You almost died, Y/N!” He barked and you were taken aback by the anger swelling in him. “I should have been there!” He got up and began pacing the room, the muscles in his arms, still bare, twitching with rage. He lent on the window ledge, his back towards you. But your eyes never left him.

You’d been right. Guilt had been eating him alive, but you were wrong about why. You were struggling to process it. “That wasn’t your fault, Dean. I knew the risks-”

“I should have stopped him. You should never have gotten hurt. He should never have been able to put his filthy fucking hands on you!”

“Dean,” you stood up to stand behind him you reached a hand out to touch his bare skin. You didn’t know why but you couldn’t stop. “Dean, you did save me. I’m alive, aren’t I?” You murmured.

He grunted before he finally looked at you. You knew he was angry but his eyes only reflected pain and looking at them made your heart break. For all he wanted to deny it, Dean cared fiercely for those close to him. And he was the ‘big brother’. He was used to feeling responsible for people, especially after his dad… and so he blamed himself completely when things went wrong. It was a burden he carried with him always, and it was particularly evident now. But that didn’t make it better. You still hurt for him.

Before you had time to think about it, you wrapped your arms around his taut waist, resting your head on his back. He didn’t move at first, but slowly he relaxed, the tension and anger seeping out of his body under your touch. If only you knew how crazy he was for you. If only you knew the difference your touch made. If only you knew.

“I’m alive because of you.” Your voice wobbled.

He seemed to give in. He turned in your arms and returned your hug, resting his chin on your hair as you buried your face in his chest. You let the tears flow now, and so did Dean. There was always emotional hangover after a tough hunt, but this was worse than anything you’d experienced before. Your heart was breaking, for Dean, for Sam, for the people you’d lost.

Suddenly, you felt two stong arms scoop you up and carry you back to the bed. Laying you down, Dean climbed in beside you, and pulled your body close. He whispered “I’m sorry,” against your hair more times that you could count and you’d gotten tired of trying to stop him.

“Y/N?” Dean’s breathy voice broke the silence that had fallen over you.

You looked up at him from where you lay on his chest. “Yeah?”

“Never leave me, okay?” His gaze never wavered. Your breath came faster. The look in his eye was… there weren’t words to describe it.

“Dean, I-”

“I just want to be with you forever.” He had to get the words out now, or he’d never pluck up the courage to say it again. “When you passed out last night, and I thought I was going to lose you,” his voice cracked, “shit, y/n, I’ve never been so scared in my entire life. And it made me realise that I couldn’t live without you. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I don’t-”

You cut him off with your lips on his. It was gentle at first, Dean shocked at the turn of events, but he slowly melted into the kiss. You drew back a moment later, your eyes wild, your breath coming fast, your forhead, resting against Dean’s, plastered with sweat. His green eyes were bright and untamed and he stared back at you, bringing his hand to your face.

A nervous giggle escaped your lips, a smile left on your lips. “I’m not going anywhere, Dean.” You breathed agains his lips.

And suddenly, he shared your smile. “You know…” he entwined his fingers in your hair, “I’m not quite convinced.”

A breathy laugh later and your lips were on his again. And again. And again.

[neuropathicgypsy]

Yesterday Jesse was seriously being a bitch to me and his daughter. Just being absolutely disgusting.

So I tell rhe FBI, Jesse needs more charges on him.

S they're at this federal penitentiary. It's unconventional and they had to sign all kinds of agreements and legal papers to be there. Like you can let me escape and I won't sue. But I'll be put back in jail for max. And worse punishment

So it's an earn your way prison.

For example. Dejoria heard screams and heard that some of the other people were being sprayed with the fire hose. So she took her bible and put it under the plastic pillow case to protect it because it's literally the only thing she has to read. And it's thick.

Well they were doing my side of the prison and they had to investigate her to see what's going on. So the sprayed her. And it's super hot water. Then it gets cold when you have no way to dry off and there's no sun, etc.

So she just put her head on her knees and cried and tried to get warm. Jumping jack and crying. So they went to check on her and they opened her actual person door not tray/handcuff door (just a big crack) and told her to put her hand out palm up but she was also told to put her hand on the wall mid way, yelled so she panicked and put both hands on the wall. She was supposed to just put the jail cell hand on the wall. So the jail guard took her hand faced it palm up and slid a heater handle onto it. And let her take it into her cell to dry her cell, blanket and warm up.

She was the only one of two out of 9 people that got a heater. 9 people got sprayed. 2 got a heater.

When they open the door it showed her they were trusting her emotional, spiritual and physical reaction to be true. And they were rewarding her.

I suppose that would anger some of you. Some or all of you victims. But I saw her later. And she was truly traumatized. And she didn't complain to anyone at all. Just took the punishment. Cried like a baby but didn't whine. Just had pure emotions.

I don't order people to do anything -- let me make that clear --- I tell on the bad guys and I say when I've had too much then they take action. I can't lie, well I could but I don't. Everything is extremely monitored. I also didn't make the punishment system. It's a federal guideline thar have been tweaked and worked on for years. I'm actually quite surprised about how it all works. But I'm also very pleased.

It's much like "on Earth as it is in Heaven" The infamous Lords Prayer. If you're worth a shit you're left alone. Or rewarded after a punishment.

They're all in the testing phase.

So I'll continue to tell us why we will have a very Merry Christmas:

Jesse James escaped and apparently broke his back and has been laying in a dirt street for over 12 hours. He was given a tiny bottle of morphine just like the kind he stole from my sick and hurt babies. Without a needle to extract it. With double sealed lid.

JP Degoria also escaped but Jesse told him he was going to kill him and to turn back. So he did like the coward he is and he got the shovel they used and went to a different part of the yard to dig himself another hole.. using the corner of the yard which makes it more difficult to actually get out. Then he found himself a floral print dress and a pair of black High heels a tad too small. So keep that in your mind. He's fleeing all jolly in a pair of heels his nappy gray hair flowing behind him.

So what happened was, I said Jesse needed more charges.. like fucking with me and his kid. Except. They were all okay, "get your shit, you're moving" and took them out barefoot in the cold, basically in rhein underwear. Then they stopped about 100 foot from the fence where there were 2 or more shovels. And the door of the van opened. So they made their choice to escape custody at that time.

Then Jesse went and dug like a dog on his hands and knees after JP helped start the hole

Jesse ended up finding some tennis shoes and an old burly coat. His section was only woods.

The section JP eventually escaped from held an "established" fake town with food, clothes, electricity, water, beds. Everything like it was 1950. He's having a lovely time creating more charges like breaking and entering, theft, grand larceny, auto theft and more. While on federal land. So it's federal charges. No misdemeanors here

Meanwhile Jesse lays in pain in the middle fo the road, having fallen off the back of the van he tried to comadeer.

They took Alexis Dejoria out, too. But she refused to get out. But she wss screamed at to get out. So she did. But just sat in a ball and cried and waited. At the road away from the fence. So she was allowed to get back in after about an hour. She was also allowed to use a direct cell phone to call her kid. She did and finally her daughter answered.

For billionaires they're penny pinchers and don't want to pay the outrageous costs of collect calls. So it was finally her ability to talk to her daughter. She was just crying and crying. Absolutely terrified and hysterical. It was pure emotions. While we may all believe she deserves that. It's not really an eye for an eye. But she's learning alot now through her own eyes. And she's suffering. Which is the point of prison.

If she continues she will eventually be moved to a better housing unit. The one where good behaviors go. She can commisary, talk to other people, make cheaper phone calls, be in a regular type prison.

Right now they're all in solitary confinement.

Escaping adds a year to that sentence. So she saved herself that year and got a phone call to her daughter and since it's Christmas she also gets to call her today, free of charge.

That wasn't me. I didn't say she could do that

But to further reward her they did use my suggestions and they gave her bleach and a sponge and music to listen to as she cleaned. She had to return the music and did and said thank you and didn't whine she couldn't listen longer.

They wanted to allow her to feel some of the freedom she gave up.

I think she deserved it

So while JP found himself an old wooden jail and scratchy wool blanket and a slab to lay on, Jesse not desiring to move, near woods just like he took Matt Hagan over 30 years ago and starved and beat ---- they're still both enclosed in jail.

So they escaped. Yet. They haven't even left.

It's a maze. They use it as training facility for army/police type shit and there's fences all over and if you don't know where you are...

For example. Jesse would go under a fence to get to where JP is so Jesse wold think "freedom" but JP to get there Jesse is would think he's going back to prison that way cause the woods. So he would escape even more if he went the other way, he would think.

And to make shit lovely, their holes are already covered back up.

**they don't have their sentences yet. They're only charged but they will be held n solitary for a year now because they won't be able to actually escape. Eventually they will get them.

***also they were incorrect last night in the communication styles with me last night. It's expensive to call, they can only leave messages tho. The other person listens. So in in good behavior they make regular person to person calls.

***extreme pain today so anything else that's misleading, whatever. I don't care.

[internetdetectives]

11/11/19 - Chat with Erika

Erika_XP💚: "Oh my lord I am so sleepy”

Slinky Stinks△: "Dudes”

Slinky Stinks△: "I can't stay up untyl 11/11”

Slinky Stinks△: "I'm too sleepy”

Xenquility: "Dude

Xenquility: "sleep now and wake up later”

Xenquility: "If you're gonna sleep do it early”

Xenquility: "Cause it's only 4:30 est

Erika_XP💚: "I was supposed to sleep a while ago but I cant actually bring myself to sleep I am so excited and worried”

Xenquility: "Probably a good while till jid starts”

Slinky Stinks△: "B r u h”

Slinky Stinks△: "I gotta go 2 school”

Xenquility: "o”

Slinky Stinks△: "I can just stay up and drink redbull tho”

Slinky Stinks△: "That was my summer plans for two weeks”

The Sun: "All who get cancer from my radiance weren't born to bear the gifts I give unto them. :ArmLeft: :dawn: :ArmRight:”

Erika_XP💚: "Those things are rubbish”

Erika_XP💚: "poison really”

Slinky Stinks△: "I'm so brave, I sunbath WITHOUT CREAM”

Slinky Stinks△: "brUH”

The Sun: "Wtf is an erika”

Slinky Stinks△: "THAT COMEBACK WAS”

Slinky Stinks△: "LMAO XEN UR DED”

Slinky Stinks△: "SHE KILLED U”

Xenquility: "She uh”

Xenquility: "said”

Erika_XP💚: "Im sorry are you ok”

Xenquility: "ur mum”

Xenquility: "If that's a comeback I'm jumping off a roof”

Xenquility: "Why am I doing this anyways”

Xenquility: "What's life anymore”

Slinky Stinks△: "Shut up xen ur ded”

Slinky Stinks△: "She got chu”

Erika_XP💚: "I did not know my own strength on that one I feared I shattered you”

Erika_XP💚: "OH GOD THIS IMAGE DISTURBS ME FOR SOME REASON”

Slinky Stinks△: "Well then prepare for the day your skeleton gets freedom”

Slinky Stinks△: "It is uncomfortable inside a meat vessel”

Erika_XP💚: "I have delt with scarier”

Erika_XP💚: "I once watched the regiminis video but at 11:11 at night alone outside on my laptop”

Xenquility: "ok you do not exist”

Xenquility: "you are not real”

(...)

Erika_XP💚: "I think I passed out for a moment but I think  may have just woken up in time to make sure Tyler is ok”

Erika_XP💚: "@IIIII Tyler I am sure you are busy and can't see this but GOOD LUCK I have been saying prayers for you this whole day”

ADULT_LINK△: "just a uh”

ADULT_LINK△: "suggestion”

IIIII: "Jesus h christ fuck off”

ADULT_LINK△: "people tend to get annoyed when ya ping em needlessly”

Erika_XP💚: "I just wanted to make sure you were ok I am sorry”

Eevee Reborn: "Erika has severe stokholm syndrome”

Erika_XP💚: "Would you kindly sod off”

DensO Burton: "Oh god”

Ross the Claus 🎄: ":0”

Eevee Reborn: "Erika: exists”

Eevee Reborn: "Tyler: rabid foaming mad demon”

Xenquility: "It's like watching a disaster in slow motion”

DensO Burton: "Ok erika how do u imagine tyler's d”

DensO Burton: "Sorry”

Erika_XP💚: "I beg your pardon?”

DensO Burton: "Just a joke”

Erika_XP💚: "Sorry I am really socially awkward ^^;”

DensO Burton: "Don't worry it wss a BAD joke”

/Mr. Circle\: "i'm ashamed of the voice i read erika's messages in after "sod off"”

DensO Burton: "Lol”

/Mr. Circle\: "soteetos”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 10:56 PM: “ᴛʜᴀᴛ sᴇᴇᴍᴇᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ ʀᴜᴅᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ.”

otherLiam 10:57 PM: "I’m surprised you joined us in here. Not worried about our chats being monitored?” 

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 10:58 PM: "sᴇᴇᴍs ᴘᴏɪɴᴛʟᴇss ɴᴏᴡ.”

Densgivin 10:58 PM: "Hey”

Ross the Claus 🎄 10:58 PM: "hey ghost”

Xenquility 10:58 PM: "Nice role….”

otherLiam 10:59 PM: "Anything interesting going on?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:00 PM: "ɪᴛ ʜᴀs ʙᴇᴇɴ ᴀ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ, ɪ ᴀssᴜᴍᴇᴅ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅʀᴏᴘ ɪɴ.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:00 PM: "ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴏʟᴇ ᴄᴏʟᴏʀ ɪᴍᴘʀᴏᴘᴇʀ, xᴇɴ?”

Xenquility 11:00 PM: "Just the name”

Xenquility 11:00 PM: "Mainly the /”

Xenquility 11:00 PM: "and the \”

Xenquility 11:00 PM: "Anyways, seems more than coincidental the "Time to drop in” is 11/11”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:02 PM: “ɪ'ʟʟ ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇ ɪᴛ ᴛʜᴇɴ.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:02 PM: "ᴀʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴀᴛɪsꜰɪᴇᴅ?”

Xenquility 11:03 PM: "Very”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:04 PM: "ɪ'ᴍ ɢʟᴀᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟʟ ʀᴇᴄᴇɪᴠᴇᴅ ᴍʏ ɢɪꜰᴛ.”

Xenquility 11:05 PM: "Im dumb”

Xenquility 11:05 PM: "no surprise there”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:05 PM: "ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ᴍʏ ᴛʀᴀᴅᴇᴍᴀʀᴋ ꜰᴏɴᴛ ʟᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ.”

Xenquility 11:06 PM: "Yeah I got it now”

Xenquility 11:06 PM: "My brain likes to act before I think”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:06 PM: "ɪ ɢᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰᴇᴇʟɪɴɢ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴅɪsᴄᴜssɪɴɢ ɪɴ ʏᴇᴛ ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛɪᴠᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴍʏ ᴘʀᴇsᴇɴᴄᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ ʙᴀsᴇᴅ ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇᴅɪᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴇxᴛ.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:06 PM: "ᴘᴇʀʜᴀᴘs ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪs ᴍʏ ᴏᴡɴ ᴜɴsᴀᴛɪsꜰᴀᴄᴛᴏʀʏ ᴘᴀʀᴀɴᴏɪᴀ ʜᴏᴡᴇᴠᴇʀ.”

Xenquility 11:07 PM: "No, my original text was me snarkily saying "What gift?” before I realised it was the video”

Xenquility 11:07 PM: “I’m surprised there aren’t as many people here right now”

Xenquility 11:07 PM: ”(Everyone here raise your hand)”

Ross the Claus 🎄 11:09 PM: “:raised_back_of_hand:”

Xenquility 11:09 PM: "Liam was here but has disappeared in the past two minutes or so”

Eevee Reborn 11:10 PM: "Hand”

Xenquility 11:11 PM: "Hey Ghosty, just to confirm, what day and year is it for you?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:11 PM: "11/11 2019”

Xenquility 11:11 PM: "Good”

Xenquility 11:11 PM: "Should we be doing anything to help those in the past?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:12 PM: "ɪᴛ’s ᴀʟsᴏ 11:11”

Erika_XP💚 11:12 PM: ”@IIIII  This is the pivitol moment I always assume. TYLER LET US KNOW IF YOU ARE OK”

Ross the Claus 🎄 11:12 PM: “fucking stop”

IIIII 11:13 PM: "not only is it 11:12 but you are single handedly the most annoying little fuck to ever grace this group”

Erika_XP💚 11:13 PM: "Im just glad to know you are ok”

IIIII 11:13 PM: "NO NO I AM NOT OK ACTUALLY”

otherLiam 11:14 PM: "this has now crossed over into obvious trolling”

IIIII 11:14 PM: "were yuo expecting a fucking video?”

Xenquility 11:14 PM: "Can we just ban them at this point”

IIIII 11:14 PM: ”@Erika_XP💚”

IIIII 11:14 PM: “@Erika_XP💚”

IIIII 11:14 PM: ”@Erika_XP💚”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:15 PM: “ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜʏ.”

IIIII 11:16 PM: "Fucking a yuo dumb bitch dont worry there will be a video tonight its just going to be late now because I had to sit here and call you an annoying cunt for distracting me”

ADULT_LINK 11:18 PM: "oof”

Erika_XP💚 11:18 PM: ”@ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ I dont think he is usually like this I think he is just having a bad time considering the day. I will harden myself as well!”

ADULT_LINK 11:19 PM: “snrk”

Erika_XP💚 11:19 PM: "what is this short for?”

otherLiam 11:21 PM: "Assuming you aren’t trolling because I’m bored, it’s not short for anything. It’s the sound of someone holding in a laugh.”

ARGdov 11:23 PM: "oh shit I missed soem shit”

otherLiam 11:23 PM: "not much”

otherLiam 11:23 PM: "mostly just ghostbabel joined”

otherLiam 11:23 PM: "and tyler yelled at erika for being annoying”

ARGdov 11:23 PM: "well I also see someone got chewed out lol”

ARGdov 11:23 PM: "astounding”

QuoteBOT 11:26 PM: "Ok erika how do u imagine tyler’s d”

ARGdov 11:26 PM: "ive heard its quite a lot for most to manage tbh”

ARGdov 11:26 PM: "so Im wondering too”

Erika_XP💚 11:27 PM: "Ok I get that I am annoying, I remind myself of this often. But I see no reason for all the awful aggression. I only excuse it because of who we are talking about here and considering the situation.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:27 PM: "ɪ sᴇᴇ ɪ ᴀᴍ ɴᴏᴛ ɴᴇᴇᴅᴇᴅ.”

Eevee Reborn 11:27 PM: "The fuck”

Xenquility 11:27 PM: "Actually you are needed”

ARGdov 11:27 PM: "nope”

Xenquility 11:27 PM: "We always need you”

IIIII 11:27 PM: "You were literally never needed”

ADULT_LINK 11:27 PM: "hi ghost”

ARGdov 11:27 PM: "as usual we are capable of tearing ourselves apart on our own”

ADULT_LINK 11:27 PM: "howsit goin”

otherLiam 11:27 PM: "okay hang on what is happening here”

IIIII 11:27 PM: "can you stop fucking larping”

ARGdov 11:28 PM: "Im lost”

ARGdov 11:28 PM: "if tylers fucking ooc why is ghost not ooc”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:28 PM: "ᴄᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ?”

otherLiam 11:28 PM: "That’s what I’m wondering”

Eevee Reborn 11:28 PM: "This went from trial of fire to full on…. dammnit, Dov’s watching”

ADULT_LINK 11:28 PM: "oof”

ARGdov 11:28 PM: "lol what did I do now”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 11:28 PM: "ɪ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴛʜɪs, ᴀɴʏᴡᴀʏ, ᴀᴅɪᴇᴜ.”

IIIII: "Oh trust me I would fucking love to dumbass”

otherLiam: "Is this ooc?”

ARGdov: "night, ghost”

Eevee Reborn: "Oof”

ARGdov: ".....if it is Im confused.”

otherLiam: "I can’t even fucking tell anymore.”

ARGdov: "but also if I start asking Tyler questions I feel like it'll annoy him more lol”

Erika_XP💚: "what does ooc mean?”

ARGdov: "out of character”

ADULT_LINK△: ":eye::eye:”

Eevee Reborn: "I'll ask him a question”

IIIII: "@Erika_XP💚 it means none of this is real and you are a stupid cunt brb”

ARGdov: "gosh”

otherLiam: "ok so he is ooc”

otherLiam: "but is talking to characters”

ARGdov: "weird”

ARGdov: "still dunno what you mean by this xD”

otherLiam: "by the way eevee, it’s become clear this is a troll”

Eevee Reborn: "You guys are brutal”

ARGdov: "this is certainly a new form of trolling tbh”

ARGdov: "acting like a fangirl who wants sempai to notice her”

ARGdov: "this is forwarding the field of trolling quite a bit, it used to be you barged in and called people slurs and made them mad”

Eevee Reborn: "Quick, let's play bolero of fire so Erikas epic trial of fire has a soundtrack”

ARGdov: "this is much more subtle”

ARGdov: "much more sinister”

otherLiam: "where’ve you been, trolling has advanced quite a bit”

ARGdov: "much more traditionally feminine”

ARGdov: "she deserves an award”

otherLiam: "i’m gonna laugh when it turns out this is just wolfcat on another screen”

Erika_XP💚: "I dont know where this "trolling" idea comes from”

Xenquility: "Honestly the wolf idea has come to my head a few times”

Eevee Reborn: "Feminine troll”

ARGdov: "@Erika_XP💚 I present to you this honorary doctrate in trolling”

ARGdov: "oh my gosh”

Xenquility: "fuckdsf”

ARGdov: "this being Wolf”

ARGdov: "that makes a lot of sense”

ARGdov: "but also like”

ARGdov: "I dunno if he'd do that”

ARGdov: "after he got in trouble for gamejacking”

Xenquility: "They did  just freak out after being accused of being wolf”

otherLiam: "he totally would”

ARGdov: "they did yes”

ARGdov: "which makes me wonder if they are”

Xenquility: "Also wolf has never been online with her”

Xenquility: "Or interacted with her”

ARGdov: "shit yeah”

otherLiam: "lmao”

otherLiam: "good bit wolf”

ARGdov: "@Wolfcat WHERE ARE YOU”

otherLiam: "10/10”

ADULT_LINK△: "what iff....”

ARGdov: "you got us all lol”

ADULT_LINK△: "this is ALl canon”

otherLiam: "that’s a good fuckin bit”

ADULT_LINK△: "im :high:”

ADULT_LINK△: "fuck”

ARGdov: "thorin”

ARGdov: "you're always high”

ARGdov: "and you've lost track of the story”

ADULT_LINK△: ":eye:”

ADULT_LINK△: ":eyes:”

otherLiam: "we’ve all lost track of the fuckin story”

mfgreth: ":thinking:”

ARGdov: "@Erika_XP💚 because you're wolf we're revoking your honorary doctrate”

Eevee Reborn: "Quick Dov, we need your wise ideas. Ideas that have NEVER lead us astray.”

otherLiam: “greth pls help”

ARGdov: "yes, listen to me”

ARGdov: "clearly I have always made the right decision in this ARG”

Xenquility: "We need to post a screenshot of the future to the past”

Xenquility: "bomb plans 8.9”

otherLiam: "brilliant”

otherLiam: "then we play the oath to order and summon all the giants”

Eevee Reborn: "We look Dov. Our overlord”

Xenquility: "Then song of storms 10 hours which we never turn off”

otherLiam: "but then we use the giant mask to make them bigger”

Xenquility: "then .root”

otherLiam: "then we >c_connect johnisdead.com”

Erika_XP💚: "who is wolf?”

ARGdov: "uh no we dont need to use the giant mask to mkae them bigger”

ARGdov: "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWbkxaTU1Z0”

ARGdov: "we'll just use the rita repulsa method”

otherLiam: "damn u rite”

mfgreth: "You wan erika banned???”

Xenquility: "yes”

Xenquility: "please god”

otherLiam: "prolly a good idea”

otherLiam: "before tyler’s head explodes”

Xenquility: "holy shit the tags on the pumpkinpology video say "erika"”

Xenquility: "no jk”

otherLiam: "...holy shit there’s no way.”

Xenquility: "no”

Xenquility: "I'm kidding”

ARGdov: "ahahahhaha”

otherLiam: "fuck off”

otherLiam: "dont do that to a man when he’s already hurtin”

ARGdov: "in any case I need a magic wand to go make whatever the fuck grow”

Eevee Reborn: "Penor”

Erika_XP💚: "Why should I be getting banned???”

ARGdov: "because you're Wolfcat”

otherLiam: "because you’re either a troll, wolfcat, or way too young to play this game.”

mfgreth: "Im not gonna ban erika”

mfgreth: "I dont see a reason tbh”

ARGdov: "or alternaively because you are a naive nusiance and for once we're gonna nip a problem in the bud before it gets too large”

Eevee Reborn: "And being wolfcat is NOT a victimless crime”

Xenquility: "(They might not actually be wolfcat lmao)”

otherLiam: "I mean she literally poked tyler until he was forced to drop character

with weird fan worship”

ARGdov: "see the one thing is about her being wolfcat Im not sure about is”

ARGdov: "Tyler was super pissed at him literally yesterday”

ARGdov: "why would Wolf decide to try and troll him”

otherLiam: "im mostly memeing, i doubt it’s wolf”

Erika_XP💚: "Maybe you are naive actually, just last night I was linking one of you a video none of you had technically ever seen and now you are acting like this”

ARGdov: "Im pretty sure we had seen that video actualy”

otherLiam: "wat”

ARGdov: "just because it ws unlisted doesnt make you special”

Eevee Reborn: "Wolfcat likes to start drama. Big drama starter always. Yup”

ARGdov: "actually Im next to POSITIVE we have”

otherLiam: "What video was it?”

Xenquility: "Yknow if this is a troll they've succeeded”

Xenquility: "We're all fighting over nothing on 11/11”

otherLiam: "I mean, nothing’s happened yet.”

otherLiam: "Other than the Greths poking us”

Xenquility: "If they aren't getting banned we can't do anything about it”

otherLiam: "and GB joining”

mfgreth: "I can protect erika with communism”

otherLiam: "people cant even protect their own families with communism”

ARGdov: "this was the video”

Xenquility: "Yeah we've seen that”

ARGdov: "Im aware”

ARGdov: "Erika claimed she was the first person to find it”

Xenquility: "It's been on the ID channel for months”

ARGdov: "my point is literally just that she was wrong”

otherLiam: "Not only have we seen that”

otherLiam: "we’ve also solved the ciphers on it” 

ARGdov: "yup”

mfgreth: "Rood”

ARGdov: "look, if shes not Wolf, then idk what her deal is”

ARGdov: "because she clearly knows to some extent that this isnt real. earlier yesterday she asked if the issue was "gm stuff"”

otherLiam: "listen slinky’s a kid, but at least he just endearingly screws up instead of weirdly worshipping Tyler.”

Xenquility: "I think we should just drop the issue for now. We're not going to be reaching a resolution anytime soon and to be fair, if this is a really young kid, we've kinda just mobbed on her like a lynch mob”

otherLiam: "this is clearly a plant from the lunar children”

ADULT_LINK△: "i bet yall bitches never seen THIS video”

otherLiam: "if you post rickroll”

ARGdov: "or its Raven”

ARGdov: "or Suxx”

ARGdov: "honestly I would buy it being Raven”

ARGdov: "...”

ADULT_LINK△: "and now nobody else gets to see the video”

ARGdov: "Im not sure if we have seen this”

ARGdov: "Ive opened it”

Xenquility: "oh my gid”

Xenquility: "I love this”

ARGdov: "oh my gosh”

ARGdov: "its a monica vid”

ADULT_LINK△: ":hylotl_eyes:”

ARGdov: "of course”

otherLiam: "tfw you will never have tyler because his heart belongs to monika sempai”

Xenquility: "Some say video 2 only appears once a year”

otherLiam: "just monika”

ARGdov: "always”

ARGdov: "just monika”

ARGdov: "only monika”

otherLiam: "Just Monika”

otherLiam: "Just Monika”

otherLiam: "Just Monika”

ARGdov: "smack Liam”

ARGdov: "GET AHOLD OF YOURSELF MAN”

otherLiam: "neck snaps at 90 degree angle”

ARGdov: "OH SHIT”

otherLiam: "runs at screen”

ARGdov: "pulls out fairy in a bottle”

ADULT_LINK△: ":honl:”

ARGdov: "heals you”

ADULT_LINK△: ":fairy:”

otherLiam: "dov have you played this dumb game”

Xenquility: "what the hell he gets a sledge hammer”

ARGdov: "I have but I didnt finish it tbh”

ARGdov: "but I know its deal”

Xenquility: "this usb is indestructible”

otherLiam: "takes too long to get going imo”

otherLiam: "act 1 should be like, a day shorter”

ARGdov: "eh, whatever”

ARGdov: "its god shit either way”

Xenquility: "LMAO I didn't see the "Game" part and I thought you were talking about the video”

ADULT_LINK△: "im gonna keep smoking and open my  f o u r t h  e y e “

ARGdov: "this reminds me”

otherLiam: "no im talking about ddlc”

otherLiam: "also man”

ARGdov: "I should keep palying Dream Daddy”

otherLiam: "it’s almost not 11/11 anymore on the ec”

ARGdov: "but it was so wholesome it made me gag”

ARGdov: "rip”

ARGdov: "somethings coming”

mfgreth: "Yeesh”

Eevee Reborn: "Me :sweat_drops:”

Eevee Reborn: "Now if anyone is going to obsessively fangirl over a hottie, jontron is it”

otherLiam: "he got married”

Eevee Reborn: "Jontron > Tyler”

ARGdov: "what if I wanna fangirl over someone else”

mfgreth: "Happy 11/12”

ARGdov: "Lestat the Vampire > Jontron”

ARGdov: "he can suck me any day”

otherLiam: "but something’s” 

otherLiam: "changed”

otherLiam: "Changed”

otherLiam: "Changed”

otherLiam: "CHANGED”

mfgreth: "Lestat is a punk bitch”

ARGdov: "or any night, I guess”

ARGdov: "well yeah and thats why hes great”

Eevee Reborn: "Lestat? But he's french.”

ARGdov: "I can forgive him for that”

Erika_XP💚: "11/11 is over @IIIII Tyler are you safe? I hope so”

ADULT_LINK△: "oh goddamn it”

otherLiam: "erika”

otherLiam: "stop spamming tyler”

Erika_XP💚: "Whatika?”

Eevee Reborn: "Oof”

ADULT_LINK△: "i had the song i wanted to hear earlier downloaded :dabeangery:”

ARGdov: "no one likes getting that manys pings”

Erika_XP💚: "Im not spamming him”

ARGdov: "also”

ARGdov: "NONE”

otherLiam: "he’s been pretty clear he wants you to stop”

ARGdov: "OF THIS”

ADULT_LINK△: "quit pingin him”

ARGdov: "IS REAL”

ADULT_LINK△: "EVERYTHING”

ADULT_LINK△: "IS”

ARGdov: "SO STOP ACTING LIKE IT”

ADULT_LINK△: "REAL”

ARGdov: "Tylers not in character right now”

ARGdov: "in fact, do you know whats happened to Tyler in-game?”

Eevee Reborn: "Ben is real Dov, stop ruining the emersion”

ARGdov: "Tyler was kidnapped”

ARGdov: "and taken to another dimension”

ARGdov: "and we dont know whats happened to him”

IIIII: "I'll show you something real”

ARGdov: "so before you spam, read the fucking wiki for starters”

Xenquility: "LOL”

Xenquility: "She's gone”

IIIII: "Fucking stupid bitch”

Eevee Reborn: "what happened”

mfgreth: "What the heck”

ARGdov: "what?”

ARGdov: "no shes still here for me?”

ADULT_LINK△: "why u so aggresive over the dum fangirl”

ADULT_LINK△: "yeesh”

otherLiam: "she’s a troll”

ADULT_LINK△: "like i get she's annoying you but like”

ARGdov: "dumb fangirls tend to do that topeople”

ADULT_LINK△: "still, we didnt get this hostile towards raven”

ARGdov: "um”

ADULT_LINK△: "at least, not this quickly”

ARGdov: "we sort of did? after awhile?”

mfgreth: "Wow”

mfgreth: "Tyler”

ARGdov: "like I literally told her to fuck off”

IIIII: "What”

Eevee Reborn: "Is she kicked or something?”

ARGdov: "granted I didnt call her a bitch but still”

mfgreth: "Banned”

ARGdov: "no shes still here, Im p sure”

otherLiam: "man i tried to give her the benefit of the doubt but she really did kinda reach that point real fast”

ARGdov: "@Erika_XP💚 testing”

Eevee Reborn: "OOF”

ADULT_LINK△: "she got kicked”

ARGdov: "oh ok”

ARGdov: "well”

ARGdov: "we did try and explain to her multiple times she was acting inappropirately but she refused to listen”

ARGdov: "so, even if we were pretty harsh on her overall the ban still seems deserved”

otherLiam: "just constantly pinging tyler and asking him weird shit”

ADULT_LINK△: "damn”

Eevee Reborn: "Wow, Tyler. Wow”

ADULT_LINK△: "fuckin brutal yall”

mfgreth: "Thats fucked up imo”

mfgreth: "I am not down with that”

otherLiam: "she referred to him as “my Tyler”.”

ARGdov: "and called him 'handsome'”

mfgreth: "Shes probably 12”

mfgreth: "Or 14”

ARGdov: "wait no she didnt but she said something close to that”

Eevee Reborn: "My tyler? Handsome? That BITCH”

otherLiam: "slinky is 13”

mfgreth: "What if she has some sort of spectrum disorder?”

otherLiam: "he doesnt act like that”

ADULT_LINK△: "she sounded older than 12/14”

ARGdov: "I was an obnoxious needy 14 year old and I wasnt this bad”

ARGdov: "you know”

ARGdov: "she may have been on the spectrum”

otherLiam: "what if she does? who cares? i hold people to the same standard of not being assholes.”

Eevee Reborn: "No, you've gotten badder”

ADULT_LINK△: "when i called her young she said something about who said she was young”

mfgreth: "I feel like yall are gonna do the usual fucking thing start speculating i was erika trolling like you did wolf”

mfgreth: "(Bs btw)”

mfgreth: "But im not cool with that”

mfgreth: "Im out.”

otherLiam: "that was mostly a joke”

ARGdov: "but even people on the spectrum can understand that when you're told "you should stop this" multiple times will usually stop”

ADULT_LINK△: "whys everyone bein so fuckin hostile tho jesus”

otherLiam: "wat”

ARGdov: "oh I dont think shes you”

ARGdov: "I mean”

ADULT_LINK△: "shes not mugen, she's just some random chick whos a bit odd”

Xenquility: "Wha-”

Xenquility: "Holy fuck”

ARGdov: "I dont think greths totally wrong tbh”

ADULT_LINK△: "aaaand greth left”

ARGdov: "Tyler got out of hand”

ADULT_LINK△: "goddamn it you guys who the fuck gave everyone angery pills”

ARGdov: "welp”

ARGdov: "wait shit”

/Mr. Circle\: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANGERYYYYYYYYYYYY”

Xenquility: "Welp”

ARGdov: "...oh ok right other people are mods”

/Mr. Circle\: ":angery:”

Xenquility: "If they're a troll, they sure as hell succeeded”

/Mr. Circle\: "this emoji is massive??”

ADULT_LINK△: "emoji's are bigger when alone!”

ADULT_LINK△: ":notzelda:”

ADULT_LINK△: "i love it”

ADULT_LINK△: "makes gif ones easier to see”

IIIII: "So tonight”

IIIII: "is finally the end”

ARGdov: "I do think Tyler got out of hand and honestly I probably did too, but, also....yeah she needed to get banned.”

ARGdov: "the end?”

otherLiam: "The end?”

IIIII: "I hope you are excited”

/Mr. Circle\: "the end?”

ARGdov: ".....nope now Im nervous”

otherLiam: "arg ends in a rickroll”

IIIII: "I have been for years”

otherLiam: "is this real? We’re really ending it?”

ARGdov: "no way”

otherLiam: "the final death of the id’s”

ARGdov: "its not ending like this.”

otherLiam: "jk i’ll fuckin start something if it really is”

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Y'all getting tortured too..I lost it. I couldn't handle it

I got germ x on a cotton round and started washing my face.

I got more body parts to literally scrub

After my grandpa died of cancer -- well. Denise killed him but they said it was the cancer...

I took a shower and scrubbed my body every day. I got a new toothbrush weekly.

I used a scouring pad from the kitchen and I didn't ever turn the cold water knob but just a tiny stream.

The water was all the way on full blast hot.

I scoured my skin off.

My Uncle Dad took me to the hospital when he finally came home from the ship. It finally docked.

Doctor asked had I burned myself. "No I just took shower and it just didn't feel clean.. It never feels clean"

"How hot is the shower?"

"Oh will the way hot. I turn the cold on slightly about midway to do the final rinse"

"How long do you shower for and how many times do you perform a "rinse"?"

"Well the shower stays on... I'd say 3 - 4 times when it's all the way hot then at least twice, so about 6.. Sometimes 10.. 12... 45 one day"

I heard my uncle dad sob from the corner. I looked st him perplexed. Cause I was doing right. I was keeping the germs off me.

"I just gotta stay clean dad" as he raised his head he sucked in air through his nose. And i saw a man in misery and guilt

"I'm so sorry sorry i thought you could handle the cancer. I thought you'd be okay and i just had ti fo to work but she...."

"I can handle the cancer dad. I just gotta stay clean and keep the germs off of me"

"What kind of products do you use. SOS pads... Denise doesn't buy a lot of Shampoo so i try to keep,that for my hair... So I'll use dish soap or sometimes even laundry. Bleach is good but she doesn't buy that one slot either. I don't like the amoniea. The smell bothers me but I had to use it 3 or 4 times because I didn't have anything else but that was when i found the SOS pads under the sink. Lo and behold they have soap in them already. So, i quiet using extra except when i wash my face with them. Soften the skin up a little bit more than so I don't get wrinkles"

I looked dead into his eyes and told something I didn't tell any other adult about what i did. I told my friends... But not in a way that it was me. "You know someone i heard of was...." Not I did this. But someone did.

My dad according to my DNA4U although there's,a story about that...

He was in the corner crying the whole time I was talking. "No she needs help. I need help for her."

The doctor said they had received a phone call he thought it was from the FBI. But he looked at his notepad and said "Nope the CIA."

"I just have to keep the germs off me tell them that. They need to, too"

"I'm calling them Billy don't you worry"

"Yeah" he said into the phone "i got a situation here. I'm gonna need you to come in and take her. ... Mental ward"

Son of a bitch. I attacked him. I wasn't crazy. I needed to be germ free.

I grabbed the phone "WHAT I NEED IS TO BE CLEAN AND YOU DO TOO GODDAM THE WHOLE WORLD"

And i beat that poor doctor in the head and back wirh that phone until it fell apart and nothing was left.

"And that's how I kill germs" I told his dead body.

Mental institution?!?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!? THE GERM INFESTATIONS I WOULD DIE IMMEDIATELY JUST BREATHING THE AIR!!! NO WAY IN HELL!!! GOD FUCKING NO!!!

My dad just sat there as i beat the doctor to death m his eyes and jaw open as wide as can be.

"You understand right? I'm not here to hurt you but This place it's so dirty but i came here with you. Because i trust you to keep me safe. But he wouldn't. Not. The dirtiest place in the world he would send me to and i just can't have that. I'll push the panic button to get you some help that you need"

It was right by the door. So these big ass mother fucking dudes came me in started grabbing me to hold me down and strap me to the bed. Big mother fuckers HUGE. Body builders and shit. "ARE YOU GERM FREE!! DONT GET A HOLD OF ME!! LET ME GO. GODDAMINIT!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I killed all 3. "Now i gotta wash my hands and arms. They fucking touched my face and every thing. Stuck thier fingers in my mouth and all. I need to,start with bleach. Can you get me some?"

My dad was in shock.

"Maybe later. I'll ask you again when your nervous system calms down" I washed my face and elbows.

It was 1992 Christmas was a few weeks away. My lie age I was 12. My real age I was only 8.

Finally the CIA came in "are you here to help or force me to wash my hands again?"

He put his arms up as he walked by me and sat next to my dad "well i know Gaberiel and Calvin can help. Gaberial goes to school with her and he said she looks alright but seems to be in a trance like state most of the time. But they will know what to do. Do not worry. Sabrina you cannot keep killing doctors like that"

"I'm not going!! The backwoods motel where they put the strange and i tell you none of them know how to,wash their hands!!"

"You look like a witch!!"

"At least im a clean one fuck y'all shit"

This whole team of huge CIA dudes... They all washed their hands no less than 3 minutes up their elbows for an additional two while I watched.

This big one said "she's not alright you know that. I never washed my hands this much in my life"

I warned him i would kill him if he didn't get off the team "oh no it's refreshing I don't have a problem. My face too here i come"

When he lifted his face he saw mine. "There's nothing wrong with me sir. This world is unclean"

"That's that transelike state. Her voice gets hollow and the carries. Did she kill the others like that Bill?"

"No I didn't. He made me upset while i waited for th3 help I supposed to be needing. Like no one knows,l they can poison me any second"

I knew but i didn't know Denise injected medicine into my grandpa's vein.

I COULDN'T handle this guy at the sink. He wanted to teach me like he could do it better. Like i had something wrong with me. And he didnt like it"

"Out. Just get the fuck out of here. I'll give you a chance to live."

I ended up killing the whole line of people but this one little yellow Asian man.

He was surrounded by dead bodies. 5. They took the 3 guard nurses and the doctor out already.

"Do i wash my hands now? Is it my turn?"

"SIR!!" i said pissed off. I looked around me. My poor dad "well what do you think about your surroundings?"

"You look good. Able to kill real easily. Looks like I need some more training. But I'm just here to wash my hands as i was told to"

He told me the times he needed to wash.

"Well no one else is in line so I suppose that yes it's your turn now"

I laid down on the little check up table bed and fell to sleep. I was exhausted. Killed 9 people. Because they were aliens. And i would let someone live. 3 people in total. Out of 12..

It could be a good day after all, as long as i didn't go to Baywood Inn Acres.. I'd been there before. I escaped and let all the mental patients out. Well maybe if i went I could do that again I thought as I drifted off to sleep. I could still do it. I'd killed 9 today in just seconds.. I could let the rest escape.

Snoop put me on time restrictions. I bit him. I kicked him. I punched him in the stomach. He would walk in with a shield from SWAT to tell me to stop washing at the sink.

It was all scuffed up and I had to clean it. Germs get in them scratches and cracks...

Before he knew it it was all soaped up and If he exposed, his face he would get soaped too. Bar of soap.

Oh boy he was pissed off at me. "You need to kill the right people!!" Him and Alex Laughlin both said

"Then let me use the soap for as long as I want to"

I was a horrror show star. Like a doll. Like poltergeist. There's that doll that turns it's head all creepy. My eyes be glassy I walked around like I was dead.

I was. I was so dead inside. I KNEW my grandpa would die for no fucking reason. I knew and there wss nothing I could do to save that Old man!!!!

And i KNEW i was going get cancer, too!!!

Just wash it all off. Wash it down the drain.,that is I what i would say.

This video to some. But I used to do that.

2 years later I did get cancer in my throat just like I knew I would. I wrote about it.

So I handle death a lot better. Losing one. Germs.

If I know a person doesn't wash their hands and their hands are warm. I freak the fuck out.

"Don't fucking touch me" and I get filled with violent rage.

Some people think it's cool to make fun of me. A violent assassin. To this date with my bare hands no magic included in the last 35 years I've killed 22,489,601,427 people.

So y'all need to learn to wash your mother fucking hands. 35 seconds i recommend.

CDC says it's good in 20... Don't underestimate the power of germs. Scrub faster and go for long term use of that soap you just squirted on you. Go up to the elbows!

Eventually I got okay. To be okay I had to kill people. 862 thousand.

All aliens in stolen bodies. Then i was okay again.

But until then i would sleep walk to the sink wash,me up then hit the streets in a trance.

So they got a kid to live with me... Anton. From Queer Eye... Him...

"No what are you gonna do? He's got germs on him and he's our only kid!" Alex would bark at me.

"Then you kill him" i would tell him. He never did.

So i posted a video earlier. Poor child. "Wash your hands" "wash your hands!" In the video I shared that he shared. Poor child, "Now you gotta wash both hands although only one is dirty. The other might get jealous. Up to your elbows if you want to but definitely up to your wrists"

He played in the dirt a lot. If he didn't Snoop would pour it on him. "Now what are you gonna do?!?"

I smelled him make sure the cat didn't piss on it

Man Snoop did a hard fight. "Its fucking dirt snoop shut the fuck up!!:

I let that boy teach me about dirt. Is it clean? Does it feel fresh? Or smell bad?"

I let him choose whether to wash or not.

Somethings he HAD to wash after touching "raw meat" we had a list of things that could harm us if it was left on our hands.

I had to wash after uncooked hot dogs. Had to. Kid goddam creeped me out because he didn't

I'd just look at him like he was a leeper to give me leprosy from an uncooked hot dog.

"CHILL OUT!!!"

"Uh anuh he touched a raw hot dog and he didn't wash. Uncooked meat!! Its on there check the goddam list in a hurry" he was like a monster under my bed.

"It says raw meats baby."

"Uncooked is raw"

That little boy. Sweet precious angel he is. He said "i didn't agree because i wanted to go out side and play but now I see i take the hot dog containments into the dirt if I don't wash. So i would like to wash please"

I earned a kiss from Alex who was going by Gaberiel. At the time.

It shocked me with surprise. I did something right for the first time in weeks i wasn't yelled at by an adult. I put my head down on the arm of the chair and wept and wailed and cried.

I spent so much time fighting with who was supposed to be my friends. That it made me calm and feel normal. Ever since that day my grandpa died. I had so much built in my chest like a wall. Filled my body so.

Snoop finally understood under all that muscle mass and need to assassinate... I was still there.

"Lets go get some ice cream it's on the list for,being,human and you get sprinkles for crying."

"Lets go ma then I wanna play in the dirt.

I wasn't sure i could leave the house. I felt really wobbly... To go outside and not kill... It was dangerous. I tried to go back in like 14 times. But Alex kept stopping me. Or snoop or the baby Antony.

"Took us 15 minutes to go get us a dam treat,jist from the door to the car. When we go killing shes flying down the steps and first one to the car. Ain't no one gonna know what's wrong with her! Ain't no one!"

"I do! You just need to wash your hands! Wash Your hands!!" I had a sweet little boy next to me... I looked out the window of that white Cadillac and I sure did hope i could figure out how to,keep the world safe. They played and teased and made,him laugh.,all every one,in the car laughing with joy.

I just wanted to open the car door, jump out and die.

Later I finally told. Some movie reminded me of my grandpa... The only one I ever had. The one that allowed me to kill Denise. A prison guard.

"He died from something out side of him. Not inside out side. I can't handle it. It went down his arm.. Pink. It was something pink"

Snoop on his knees. "What was it poision?"

"Watch. Into here down this way to his pinkie then back up and then down around his heart and through his legs and up the other side and to his brain then he could smell the medicine cold cough syrup. And she kept doing it until the full bottle was,in,his body. It didn't work tho. The next day and the next. 3 more,days than,that. Then he was,dead. 2 bottles each day. Of cold medicine to kill tiny germs"

Alex's face,was,in terrified horror. Snoop still as a statue.

"Where do they live at?" Asked snoop.

"Texas. Redway lane"

"That is where you live at".

"That is what i am telling you. And i was in Texas and i didn't go to Arizona"

Snoop began to throw up in his hand and,ran,from the room.

Alex and Anthony looked at me all "why did you have to tell the truth?!"

"I'm trying to watch the movie here!!" Said Anthony "and tomorrow I wanna play in dirt"

"That's ok baby That's what you can do with Uncle Snoop. We'll be quiet now so you can watch the movie."

If you don't get germs on you. You don't get sick. Then you don't get murdered.

Stay Clean.

Corona. I'm telling you. It ain't no different.

Except I was told something worse than eating Vicks Vapo Rub would happen to me from Denise.

I had to kill 981,602,375 people like Denise until I felt satisfied the world was safer.

Until I could breathe again.

I felt my grandpa die. I was with him. I felt his whole body. When his left lung collapsed...

And he was begging "no Denise don't do it. It won't make me better. No Denise I don't want none. Dont put it in my IV. I don't have no cough or cold. I have cancer and I'm going to beat it"

And that Old man died. And I tried so hard. To keep his body alive. Just stay with him.

And his body was so riddled with cancer. He couldn't take being filled with the thick cough syrup.

After a million kills. Grandpa said I could stop the world would get better then. "If I do two more grandpa then it would get allot better"

We killed 6 million predators. By hand. We picked them from prisons.

Death Row and life sentences. They could die early if they wanted. They understood they would die. They signed contracts. And we filled them in gas chambers. And filled the air with a non toxic cough syrup smelling gas that made them relax. Laughing gas. Then we used rat poision gas. Until they died. We had some other gases too. I didnt care.

We did right by our promise and they choked end coughed choked on a white foam frothing from,their mouths. And,died.. And we watched them through a little window with gas masks on our faces.

"You know you could used a little more nitrous" would say Alex

"Only half choke to death. Most of them lay down peacefully to die."

Oddly white men were more often to fight Than the black man.

"Either the black men are innocent or they know,what to do in a poison situation"

One man. Black. Should been,dead. But he was crawling around checking on,the others. In pain he was.

I ran,from the control booth. Dodging people trying to stop me. I swung open the door against policy. Grabbed him up under his shoulders "why did you sign the paper if you didn't have any thing to do with the crime?$?!" I yelled through my gas mask

"All these are all dead i want to,know why I'm not!!: he was crying he was scared. "I didn't sign the paper because i wanted the hell out. I knew if i died I would go to Heaven!: he was sobbing. In a gas chamber. Filled with poison.

Alex held up a gas mask in,the Window I pointed my head towards my direction.

And I held the black man while he was on his knees in a room full of gas. Alex put the gas mask to protect from,gas on his face.

"Lets go you got to get out. You only have half a,mask"

"I can't"

"You got to,get out now"

He chose his fate. No one else. He would tell me when he was ready to live and i would hold him on his knees until he did. I just stared into Alex's eyes. While he said over and over "you got to, get out" like in case i forgot.

"I wanna get out! Can you help me??" I reached down and grabbed him by his waist. Hoisted him up to my hip and carried him out like a toddler. A nice grown man.

This poor man was a mess.

No one mentioned i was covered in cyanide. For 3 hours until when my skin began to itch "you need,to shower"

"When you finally get covered in killer germs you don't care Because you found someone more important, more desperate. Someone more in a bad situation.,then you don't even notice"

"You trained me not to. Could I at least get an SOS pads for my bath?"

Every one wore a gas mask around me. Even the kid. For three days Anthony did.

"Snoop said you can't go in his car covered in,gas,like,that so we got a rental car"

"You gonna drive in that gas mask?"

"Yeah. Sounds fun. We have to roll down the Windows for you to breathe. I know downtown LA but... And also we got you w hotel. You are covered in cyanide!! No on wants you home. But i do"

I think... It was the first time in my life any one ever gave me a bath while wearing a gas mask.

We had to,change,3 hotel rooms. So i wouldn't pollute the place up.

"See? You yelled at me and you're all jist as bad,and,won't even let,me,see my kid"

"Yeah well you trained us to be extra careful. More cautious than sorry"

Gaberiel. Alex Laughlin slept in bed next to me. In a gas,mask.

Sometimes I couldn't sleep. Thinkin about that man and my grandpa.

And I'd look down at the man next,to me. Pased out. Looking like an innocent kid himself.

I adored him. I felt so much love that a person would be in,danger for me. I shook his gas,mask gently

"What you woke me up what do you want? It was on purpose, too"

"Do you think that man knowed i cared? That I might love someone other than myself?"

"We treat you as though you are selfish because you sre using self harm and you don't understand it. No one is supposed to gargle with bleach? What If you swallowed it?"

"It burns my nostrils any way"

"That's not the point but baby doll. You could kill yourself and we wouldn't have you no more. That is,the point.,that is why we called you selfish. Your addiction to cleanliness could,kill you snd no one,wants that to happen. But look what you do. Go,in a gas,chamber FULL of gas with only a half mask on. You're lucky you don't go blind. But look st it this way. We pushed too hard and in the wrong way and you did drink bleach on purpose in desperation to be clean. It was undiluted, too. I know. I watched you. And you Didjt say anything. Just smiled and said "i feel" i wanted to,slap you then for not listening. But when you pushed me back so you could leave,tje room through the door i was blocking. You didnt act like nothing happened. You felt like nothing happened. And I realized we were doing something wrong then two,weeks later you tell us why it was so,important to be kept clean and germs off of you. And i wanted to die for the way snoop and I had been mistreating you. And that is why I started the gas chambers of criminals to honor Yoir grandpa for working at the prison to keep,them in line. End,it for your grandpa and avenge his death with revenge. It would be what healed you both. And next time call the police when someone is being poisoned."

"She did it when i,was asleep. I would fall asleep all kinds of times of days to be with him. I promised when i was a young kid that i wouldn't let him die alone. Not by her. And when i woke up I was too groggy to remember what was going on. I thought it was a dream a bad one i hoped it wasn't real but it was and i can't get over this feeling this fear.. That had me at constant companion"

"What does that mean my love?"

"Evil. My grandpa said"

So y'all in,this world of 2020

Keep,calm.

It is,gonna be okay.

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

The reasons why the Asian Restaurant cover worked so well is because i could go in, take them out for dinner and feed them usually the factory knew would see and so I would be their friendly. Frenemi is the word now but i would be friendly to the kidnappers because they kidnapped from children's parents ad i kidnapped from the kidnappers so in revelency we were similar enough to where we were both on a common criminal territory. I didn't want to get caught or beat up so I remained a low social. Helllo. Hey. Shit like that. Social interactions limited to im not a threat to you on the street in public so if you attack me then you will be the attacker to the general public and you'll be arrested not me because i am friendly.

Friendly not nice. Friendly is a personality trait. Easy go be friends with or easy to get along with. Nice is a vulnerability.

I was nice to the victims not the kidnappers

The fine line.

Secondly and most importantly, few girls left at a time. The restaurants would pick the girls up from the bunker facility or down the street,

In Bangkok near Jane and Lily they used a seafood delivery truck. Like he was dating and killing the girls.

In Times Square we used a taxi like the girls got comfortable and called for a service and they actually did there.

So up to about 5 would go missing at a time. So it wasn't a huge deal.. They wouldn't really notice until it was too late an they just figured they were running away on their own

Because i always returned them every time and wouldn't leave until every last girl was tucked away i wasn't a culprit.

I knew the girls but i would just deny knowing they left or sometimes i would admit they went home and i knew if the girl said i could So that my cover was okay And she would be okay if they returned for her or sbe returned.

At Times Square At the Thai restaurant they ended my restaurant taking before it began because the 31 girls that left with LL Cool J

They had a guard when i went to attempt to restaurant them the first time.

I explained you have girls missing because they run awsy because you don't give them freedom. Let me take them out tonight without you a guard and let them taste it and some Chinese food and you'll see they stay more frequently.

They said they heard about me and let them ask the boss. I asked if they had cameras or tracking and shit like that.

See friendly. I get the information i need to stay safe while they think im looking out for them. I am looking out for them but I'm trying to watch my own ass and not support theirs

They didn't. So the next night they agreed but it had to be during the daylight.

That was the doughnut eating guy always leaned against the wall, the boss.

So we trained the little ones to give LL Cool J a fit since he was so pent up nervous exhausting himself.

That three year old "golle dude you need to chill it'd 25° and you are sweating like a pig!" Was an inner fighter and we sprung her loose.

She had telepathic communication with her mom. She moved from the middle to the very last of the group. I watched her change her movement. She became nervous. So i watched her intently. I had dreams about her. One day she was a bit more bouncy. "If you need to GO" i esp to her.

She took off from our group into the crowd. "Wait! Stop!" I yelled to the group. I was way behind them. I was shocked she ran. I wasn't as scared as i thought i should be. The group didn't stop. I realized i didn't even say it. My head spun from the group to her.

She took off zig zag through the crowd towards the group, away. Towards me. Away.

LL Cool J glanced up at me from his dance, stood up straight and looked directly at her "wait stop!" She slowed. "Get her!!" He pointed. I was staring at him, i already lost sight of her. I walked slowly towards him purposely ignoring him. Knowing the boss was watching, I wanted to pass out. I couldn't lose her. But i couldn't chase her. She needed to run.

The boss three done his doughnut started to down the last of his coffee intending to go after her. I stopped in front of him. He didn't even see me. "Wait. Don't. She just has a lot of access energy and she will return to the group. He wont even need to get her. Oop too late"

She was running back and LL Cool J picked her up and tossed her over his shoulder he was bewildered. "PUT ME DOWN!!! I WAS COMING BACK! I WANT TO EAT TO!!!"

I grinned apologetically, raised my palms and said "see?"

The boss threw down his cup and then himself against the wall in a dark relief sigh of exhaustion.

"I gotta go catch up"

"I'll love you" i told the girl

"Huh"

I smiled, turned arounf jogged backwards and said "alllriiiuught girls! Hut to it! Hut two three four!!"

They looked at me like the fuck? You make me nervous. So i turned and slow jogged in place till i got to the little one in back

"What about it? These girls got no energy." The older girl in front caught on and told the other girls to catch on.

"Huh what. I just want my mom. I think it's Don-- no Idk what it is"

"Well you run anytime you need to"

"That was you?" I stopped my body fake jog "I'll do anything to get to where you need to be to be rescued if that means running for a bit here and there. Just be careful we can't lose you, too"

I didn't realize the boss was right behind me. He cut around us, speeding his legs. Told the front he wanted the girls to return. "Don't be disobedient"

The older girls turned around "I'm going to the restaurant!! Anyone else??"

"Uh huh" the little one held my hand. No one older than 6 disobeyed him. I had 4 plus me and the runner.

"Walk brisk" they had to run to keep up.

He raced behind us "come on I said to return the other girls"

"The other. Not these. Come with. Don't be disobedient" he threw his hands up in the air. And stopped in the street. He stayed at the corner. We continued to the restaurant.

"I got a problem" i explained everything. I was distressed. I hadn't explained about the dreams when LL Cool J walked in

"He said walk in small groups because the one ran off and they held hands the whole way"

"They did. I didn't even tell them to" i was stressed do when everyone started crying tears of pride for the little girls i didn't know why. I was scared my heart hurt I had to get these girls home. Soon all my girls were in the restaurant, walking in holding hands.

Finally my heart released its death grip on itself. I was happy. It meant i could get them home.

"Hey i got an idea, i don't carry--"

"Oh. My gun is at the hotel"

"Why are you at a hotel?"

"Michael"

"Usually he gives us houses. No hey. Money. I need money. I don't carry anything on me but these fake jewels. Just so i look older. I'm thinking if i take these little ones my group out the other way down the street to shop then i can say I am treating them extra special like a mom would. He heard me. He heard her say she wanted her mom. That's why he returned them"

"Yeah here" he gave me way too many $100 bills. I was all I need a $10

"Okay let's just keep the street clear of us while i try this thing"

So i explained to the girls we were gonna do a mom thing and do a little shopping maybe for candy. Just a little treat, and this time not to leave my vicinity. If they were gonna run they had to run together and not in the streeet only the sidewalk.

Those streets were not used for car traffic m it wss one block over from Times Square so we had no street traffic, only delivery trucks. But the mom Donnie had been panicked when she heard her kid was in the street.

It wasn't the first time i doubled psychic with natural but it was rare. And i wasn't used to it. But the child was calm and relaxed. My heart gripped itself in fear.

"I'm scared to death y'all but I'm going to do it anyway" I walked out the door and closed it behund me, stood in front and looked down the street I was already familiar with.

The door opened and hit me "come on. We are almost done eating and he wants to talk to you anyway" a small toddler hand grabbed mine. She was so mature my mind whispered to my heart. Lets just relax.

She disappeared into the restaurant as LL Coolly J walked up to me in the door way. The restaurant like most we used has a small wall to block in our guests and keep people from grabbing and dragging them out. One design I find important before scoping out a place to see if they are helpers.

"Why are you so scared? I can take the girls..."

I explained the tension, what was currently going on and for the first time outside of my NYC apartment I cried in public. I faced the door, LL Cool J stood behind me. Back to back. So no one noticed. I turned and tapped him on the back.

"Okay you need to fix your face. I'll take them meet me in the street"

He got so nervous he panicked at the first store, told the store cashier he was in an emergency hurry he thought the kids were kidnapped and did he have candy? He got it all for free.

At the restaurant LL Cool J handed me the bag of candy and small toys. A guy ran past us, LL said "that's the guy!" His face changed a thousand expressions until it reached a boiling point.

I turned he was talking to the boss. Wlldly pointing.

"Come on little ladies!! Come on girls!"

"That's the guy that gave me the free stuff? Why is he talking to the bad guy? He gave me a card for the police. Here look. He told me to tuck it into my waist band"

I kneeled down in front of them "I want you to do me a favor. Walk to the corner. Stop and wait for me there. Hold hands"

"But you never ask me for a favor and you said---" I grabbed her and held her tight in a hug, trying to stop the tears in my eyes.

Her eyes popped open huge "alright little ladies let's dance!" They grabbed hands and walked to the corner

I approached the two men "GO" he dismissed the employee

"Hey I would never done what he did. I thought hey lets shop. Burn some energy. But i started crying -- the wind -- so hey, do you mind if? Hey. This is neat" I twirled the card between my fingers

"It wasn't windy when you went in"

"Smoke. Steam. Restaurant. Look listen, as you heard the little girl she said she wanted her mommy. Now look how happy she is"

He turned and saw she had her arms spread wide her back to the 4 girls stopping them from crossing the street.

He began laughing. "You do have a way with them! Hey you got a trick" he took the card "this doesn't go to the real police Just some characters in costume"

"Oh that's kinda sucky"

"You look displeased"

"Well it's just... Nevermind" i touched his wrist wanting to snatch that card back "do you mind if we take them shopping when they have expansive energy?"

"Expensive or expansive?" He laughed

"Well they're really the same thing actually" i twaddled at him like hahaha hand flapping around so cute I dont want you to know the first thing I,want to do is throat punch you while you think about trying to fuck me.

"Sure sure. Go ahead" he blushed and smiled big

"Okay thanks. Let me get these girls" I growled him thinking my anger was towards them

"Hey use your money" he called after. He tossed the card in the air And caught it. He was sure happy. I hoped it was good for me.

I pushed the crosswalk button. "That was great girls"

"What are we doing? We never pushed the button thing"

"Magic watch see it will change and it will mean its safe to walk if there are cars"

"Did I do good? You're not my mommy but i tried to do twice as good for her, you know, for today"

"Nothing is less than perfect" my mind said loudly as the boss nearly dropped his card 3 times thrn did then looked at me to see if i noticed. Then picked it up and slid it in his pocket while turning away and doing a whistle. He sure does eat a lot doughnuts for Bing so skinny i thought

"Hmmm?" She looked up at me and moved her hair around her face

"Yes you did baby. You did perfectly?" You love me, i thought as i pushed her hair back from her eyes to help. What was with me? I never so affectionate. I know not to get too close. Oh well fuck me. It over. She would be home soon and each girl did neef attention and hugs and these were too short for m to look in their eyes all the time. Shit they probably don't even know i care.

"So who wants to hold hands with me!?"

"Me" They all said

"Okay let's hold my belt loops. Everyone just grab one. Its sort of strange for a skirt to have so many but here it is. We all have one"

"We choose you anyway. Not that the boss the mean man that's why we let her be the boss because you choose her to give a hug. And I want a hug! We all do! And our moms!"

LL Cool J turned down the street.

"I like this skirt its made of children, I'm like a human merry go round" I thought loudly the child I had dreamed of smiled as she ran around me ad i spun. The others not so much but when i quit spinning the girls kept running and twisted my skirt around me. And i watched all their smiles brighten ae,they ran faster and faster holding my skirt belt loops. I was stuck in magic and it was beautiful

"That guy is a real fucktard he gave the card for the police and then he went and told"

"Its the fake police, its a fake business card. Come let's talk inside" i said blissfully

"Idk what is with you" he shook his head and went around me angry

We played on the sidewalk until all the girls passed and went around the way around the corner.

I asked LL Cool J to accompany me home because I was afraid the boss was still at the corner and I had to pass him to get home.

Because the closest corner to my house was between the restaurant and my apartment but the bunker was a block over and behind a building so i could only see one corner. So I used to walk the longer way the oth3r direction to avoid notice on the way I walked the girls and would disappear into the traffic of the shops. Plus there were cameras in case I got mugged, I hoped.

So i asked LL to walk that way. He said he was almost too mad but i said we could do more research and i explained that the man said we could take the girls and so he got excited brain storming with the new found freedom we had and the ability to break down doors to find who the real kidnappers were.

Once he realized how close my apartment was, he moved in for 3 weeks until Michael could get him another. Uncle Donald owned most the area So he got him one in the same building a floor higher. He had been taking a train to Michael's hotel he owned so he spent most of his time in the bunkers and a lot of times slept in the boys bunker.

That sweaty nervous lad turned into a real detective.

Meanwhile i turned into a nervous wreck going to work cause i knew the boss liked me more than just a girl walking by. He wanted me a girl in his bed.

So Mark Anthony heard from LL Cool J if he was paranoid or if i was really upset about it. So he told me he could help me.

"Im going to go to work with you. Lets walk down the street like we are in love"

"Huh what's that got to do with it?"

"I mean let's be normal just like we are at home"

I couldn't say anything I just gave big nods

"Will that work for you?" He was all concerned and actually cared

I burst into tears, "it's true i can't take it anymore. The guy creeps me out so much!" I yelled into my hands.

LL Cool J popped his head into the door, leaned against the frame. Just watched.

"Yeah she said it would be a good thing to do, yeah she's normally not a crier but that mom is really getting to her Delores or whatever her name is..."

"Its Donnie. Delores is... Someone that is going to be very bad for me"

We found the little girl would hear her mom tell her things about her home and how to find it when she would "escape" she would say "i escaped! I escaped!" And her mom would ESP her home and all that. I should known she would be an Alabama girl. Huntsville. Just North of Decatur. That's why my heart squeezed so much. It's why we had such a deep connection.

So we would tell the girls "escape! Run! You are free!!" And i would lean against the wall 5 feet from the boss. "How do you know they will return to you?" He asked in a panic

"Its NYC. I'm an Alabama girl. I have no place else to be. Neither do they"

He really had the hots for me.

"Alabama huh? I been there once or twice. Got a couple of those 3 year olds from there"

"Uhh huh mmm yep"

He looked at me with a struck by lightning look knowing he let himself be caught "you know don't you" dead in my face.

I was tired of him he disgusted me. His stupid smile. His blushing. His bulge in his pants. I wanted him dead and if it was the last thing i did, i would order it.

"Yeah i do." I stood off the wall. Tall. My chin high. Disobedient. Fire. Ready to be challenged. To kill. "My dad was kidnapped in Decatur. So i went to Iraq, Isreal, Iran. I escaped And now im here too"

"And you are going to let them escape"

"Now you know and i will kill you if you have a problem with that. Now do you?" I didn't take my face off his. My pissed off face. "LL Cool J. Get the kids. Return to my house."

It was unexpected. He had casually mentioned it the night before and we were unprepared. But i was done fed up with this piece of garbage. He walked over. Saw my rock hard face. The little bitch against the wall bouncing his ball. "Okay"

"Out through the weeds" i waited till they were at the corner.

"No! You can't!"

"You tried to replace me with Delores because you couldn't fuck me?:

"But you are back now! And free!"

"Do not try to take my kids from me. I will kill you. Don't follow:

He did begging after me "please don't I'll get fired. I'm just a kid. 19"

I was 5 years old. I didn't give two fucks about him

"I SAID NOT TO FOLLOW" i took my shoe off and beat him with the heel. It felt like the world stopped and it was just me and him, him squatting down stupidly at my feet. Exposing his back So i could kill him easier. The hired English police ran over. "Take him"

"You could killed him in two hits" tells LL when i caught up

I cried a bit because i should had. I shouldn't had sympathy because he was stupid. We saw the English Cops then began to beat them with their baton "no wait" he called after me

I threw up. His desperation was so thick. Like he needed help. He was human. Whay did i miss with this one? He was actually respectful. Nosy.

LL saw me catching up to his thinking... "I'll stop him"

"I really think he's actually a kidnapped victim and doesn't know what to do." LL said again

"That's why i told him the truth"

"About these three??" He pointed to my Huntsville Hunnies.

"No about me. Take them to get their stuff then to my house. Let me talk to him"

We walked back. "You sit. You stay" the faux police stood next to the bench facing us. Hands clasped in front of him.

"Well what is your story"

"I was kidnapped at 12 or 5... Well both actually. And like i told LL Cool J, I just never thought to go home. Just stay and work and all would be okay. Then this gig came up and i volunteered. Thinking this might br my way out"

"But you kidnapped"

"No! No i didn't! I would never do something like that! I just knew we had some from the same plqcr Because the kids walks n all cheerful, "hi im from Alabama" and i got to talking to the kid..."

"And here i have been afraid of you all this time and you were one of me"

"The next one. That is how it is up here with the premonition. You are afraid of me but the next two you have to fear. You are always in hurries. So for real you are from Alabama"

I relaxed and leaned against him. Finally felt his real energy, not the cloud that he put out around himself. "But you were the guard that said you had to ask the boss"

"Because I guard these bunkers. 32 kids went missing in one night. We didnt know if they were dead or raped. God! What do you expect from us?!?!"

I grabbed his face and kissed his cheek. "You know you wanted that one. Hey. I'll send you home. Where are you from kid?"

"Michigan"

I looked at him playing with the rocks on the sidewalk.

"My dad was kidnapped. I went to go find him. I couldn't. So now i do these. Send kids home to their parents"

He looked up at me His eyes huge "we been doing this 6 months and you just now tell me"

"Hey. I thought you were the boss out to rape me"

"Shit please. I wouldn't"

I grabbed him and hugged his side as he bent to play in,the dirt

"So what's wrong with you anyway why are you so huddled?"

"Well someone actually went and stuck their high heel shoe into my stomach then someone else beat mr with a baton"

"Will you go get him some ice please?" The police of faux nodded

"Me?"

"For you" i rubbed his thin back to help heal. "Did it go in?:

"Just a scratch"

"I bet it's as deep as a bullet wound"

The faux police returned with a 20 pound bag of ice. "He's losing a lot of blood"

"The ice will help stop it. Here sit up"

"That's too much. I have to put pressure on it"

"Your shirt is soaked. Here take my skirt. Let me see how deep it is." I stuck my finger in. Then shoved his t-shirt into the hole and then put my skirt down to absorb blood and the ice on top

He said it was my favorite skirt. And it was. But I told him it would wash out. I was wearing a man's business shirt and it was almost as long as the skirt and with tights I was okay dressed.

"Hey is this expensive?"

"Idk Michael Jackson bought it for me."

"You get paid?:

"Yeah"

"How much?"

"Idk. I never need for anything. Just to get people home"

"Are you a clone?"

"No that's gross. Are you?"

"Idk are Detroitians usually clones?"

"Uhhhhh....,the city? No."

"I have a twin that's why I ask. Do you think you can get him home?"

"If you know where he is, i can get any one home"

"He said not to tell"

"Well come on kid. Get your stuff"

"I will tell his brother" said the police.

I had a feeling someone was behind me. I couldn't figure it out

"Your boyfriend must be calling"

I stood up and yelled "hey" towards my apartment balcony

"It is you" I heard behind me "LL Cool J called me and said he had you all kinds freaking out"

"Huh? HEEEEYYY!"

"Silly. And i thought i was dumb"

"Nah he isn't..."

"Hey I'm right here" he touched my ribs on the right "where are your clothes? I'm sure I didn't see you leave the apartment like this" Mark Anthony said.

"Like my shirt? I kept it on. I nearly killed this one So i took off my skirt to help absorb the blood.

"You what? Can i take a look?"

"I figure get him home in a warm bath and help clean it out, medicate and we will put a bandage. I missed any internal organs but it went through and through. You'll be alright. Its just a flesh wound."

"It hurts."

"The bath will help. It will i promise"

LL Cool J carried Kidd Rock to our apartment. The girls trailing in front using LL Cool J's luggage and bags from our apartment.

Our new temporary family. For some it would be a few hours before they got sent home. We had been waiting. Too cautious, not knowing who was really on our street.

For them it would be the first and last time they crossed the vacant lot across from my apartment in what was once called the New World, in NYC

And for them all It was the start of a New Adventure.

My heart sang the song of the Heartlands.

I heard nothing...

Just felt the love and glory. LL carrying my wounded victim, girls gabbing and carrying bags. I saw them all. Their love and their forgiveness.

...

Oh and the cards for the fake police? It was for our Englishmen! Our own faux police!!!

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

"40 acres and a mule"

Baby what the Hell you want a mule for?

Alright baby. Let me tell you.

You will never ever ever get reparations.

Y'all this lady instigated him and pissed him off. Called him a dam liar and a begger and all kinds of bad.

I quit watching it. I seen enough. "Hustler"

Bitch I'll hustle my fist in your teeth and get you a new set, don't talk hustle when you don't know a dam thing about it.

Let me tell you about me.

I'm registered 1/16 Muscogee (Musckogee and/or Muskogee as well) Creek Nation out of Oklahoma. Our tribe headquarters is in Oklahoma in a mound of dirt -- under a pile of earth is our headquarters.

We have the original council house of brick in town it's a measeuem were all very proud of. Its on 6th street. On a big ole square.

So. Let me tell you. We used to be in Georgia. That's why i picked Atlanta for a big ole fuck you fire. I picked others but I said "this is a government thing?"

"Not really Sabrina it's more police"

"I'm hearing government in that word. Can I fuck up Atlanta? I'll take some country Georgia but you know my tribe is from Atlanta specifically. I don't want no one to get hurt though"

Tree said "i got something perfect, a Wendy's because you use to live in Ireland, too Miss Red Leg hairs in the sun"

"Alright then. Ill take you on Then. Its a done deal".

This was 2008 and to be clear, we didn't start human trafficking in that parking lot -- they already was. 12 years and they ain't stopped. We did intervene but, they dumb and stubborn and they stayed away from the Wendy's unlike the other night. For the last 12 years. This way they would be more inclined to use it. Like we bust them and they keep on. They don't care. Its greed. An addiction. They can't see. So.

I get punched in the face and I get back up and fight again. Same thing - different American Dreams.

So Spain came now Spain is over by Europe. Look at a map. And we left. From fear, we went to Florida.

We didn't have no label. We were humans. We were love. So we moved down to Tampa area.

Then we got named by the whites. The whites then fought us unlike the Spaniards who just wanted to share and we didn't want to. So we just left.

So some of us was all fuck you. We ain't moving just because Spain said we did for them don't mean we will for you. So. We fought.

Some of us were captured. So then the white people said you will show us America, The New World. Like bitch you think we know it all been all over and shit like we got cars. Fuck.

So the whites raped and tried to kill all that refused to move. So they left them. We left them. They were named Seminoles.

Because semen they were raped and we also left the old that were unable to travel. And the small kids. Two words. Semen in. Olds. Raped. Wounded. Old and children.

The rest of us took the whites and Spaniards (some did and some didn't war) across the new world.

And we followed Creeks. The Spaniards knew the rivers went North and South. They wanted to go West.

So we walked. All the way to the Middle of the United States of America. And stopped.

We said we want our land. We want our trust. We want our lives back. You go do you and leave us here and alone without you.

The Spaniards agreed. And the whites of course so fucking greedy and non cognitive. Fought.

Eventually we got our land. My family. We had a big ole 2 floor 10 room mansion. It felt like.

32 years later the government decided they wanted to build a dam. And once again. Our land was gone.

And our land was stolen.

Now that glorious home we had that my family earned to show the way West is gone. Flooded under a lake built by a dam in Oklahoma.

They moved us to Okmulgee about 45 minutes South of Tulsa.

Its not a reservation. Anyone can live there. In fact our HQ is in the city limits.

And we don't have land. We don't have anything we were promised.

Since i don't live there and i live in New Mexico, I don't get any of the benefits. And because New Mexico Native Americans warred with each other due to the Hispanics from Central America. Other Nations don't like to help me.

Here. Native American tribes in New Mexico. They're prejudice against each other. And whites.

And it's really fucking bad. I used to work at the BIA. Beaururu of Indian Affairs. "What tribe are you?" And if you were Aztec you were cool. If you were Peublo you were fighting with Navajo. And vice versa.

And we were making sure people of ALL Tribes got money for their needs. Like for medicine or transportation. And our office was fighting each other.

Like what the Hell? We all have the same purpose here. We all come from the same place, we all have the same heart and same pain. And we're all are hurt and so why are you all hurting each other?

I got a tattoo of an Indian Head on my left lower arm so no matter what unless it was long sleeves, everyone could see.

And i would hear them physically hitting each other. And they all remembered I got the tattoo and i showed them when i came back from lunch and I wss all bleeding and it was brand new.

Then i went around and showed them all as it healed. Showed them progress and lack off.

So they would fight. The Aztecs didn't put up with shit like me. And so people would try to dominate them

So i could always hear them fight. And it was a big office. An entire floor of the big Compass Bank building in Albuquerque. But I could always hear them except on the complete opposite because door ways. But three certain ladies would go to the hall and call for me to go stop it.

You know. It was the year 2000. I was only born in 1985 although I have always used a different birthday since i was adopted of 1980.

So literally I was 15 years old. "Legally" i was only 19 and not even old enough to buy alcohol and there I was pulling grammas off each other And people old enough to be my mom.

They called me a stupid white. Because I am light skinned. A stupid white nigger. I know what that is. An abusive slave owner

Me!! Me of all people!!!

I already had PTSD coming out the ass and i could barely drag my ass out of bed in the morning because i wss so suicidal depressed. And i get called a slave owner. A lazy and abusive one at that!?!

"Well i don't see you working!! You wanna call people nigger you brown ass bitch?!?! Your ass is always fighting!! Why don't you go earn a paycheck!!" She regretted running her mouth at me more than 2x. I had shoved her and when she got closer, she claimed because she couldn't hear although people from the complete opposite walls came running, i punched her in the face. Cold coked her dead to the floor. She had that evil gleam. The dead Zulululu look. That evil dumb bitch look. And no fucking way was she touching me. So then her back up who was like 7 foot tall grabbed up my hair and vagina and threw me 8 feet across the room.

I just got up and sat at my desk and pretended like nothing happened. Just like the Zulululu do. I had road rash like a mother fucker tho.

I got him later in the parking lot. Shoved him in front of a moving car at 40 mph. This girl that worked with us. A 68 mustang all real metal total steel.

He never came back to work to mess with us. And,the girl got transferred to another floor. And I got called down for her 5th fight and I interviewed the people around the fight area and they said they all worked in peace until she had come. They had whites tho.

And most New Mexico Native Americans HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE whites.

So she got fired, I recommended it. She couldn't get along with anyone. I recommended she get a job on her reservation in Montana for her tribe and so the BIA paid for her to move. Citing emotional difficulties, PTSD due to government intervention in Native American lives.

So this man he's asking for reparation in this video.

And i just want to answer him..

You never will. They were gonna fire her. Leave her dead. I asked special they send her away to a place she could likely find peace.

Nd she did. But if it wasn't for me, she would had nothing.

And she had called me a white nigger and I got thrown 8 feet across the room because of her.

I'm adding her now and him to the list. Idc if they been interviewed, its eye for an eye. They are both Zulululu and still causing fights over nothing.

I had slammed her against the wall by her throat and i wanted to kill her and i should had. But i told her "im going to do something for yoh because i hate myself more than i hate you and you will accept it. And if hou keep acting like this you will receive death more than me slamming your head on this printer until you can't breathe" then i put all the pressure I could without killing her on her throat. Then killed her anyway. Died myself went through the black hole and dragged her ass back in her body pushed the EMT OFF ME, got up and jumped on her stomach and chest full body and killed her again then this bitch tried to go to the sun, so i got her ass back. Threw her ass back in. Woke up in the fucking elevator, trying to get outta the stretcher "oh im fine where is this dam bitch"

"Oh my God! You gotta lay down!"

"Fine i bet she's not back in" got out of my body and found her hiding in the dirt.

This bitch wanted to fight?! She was gonna find me fighting her. Behind death for the rest of her life.

She was old, too. Like 46... I was only 15/19. More than twice my age. 3x my real.

I woke up in the stretcher downstairs laughing and farting. She was crying how scared she was. I thought it was funny. I was so mad I didn't care how she felt. Scared was not what i expected. It surprised me and made me laugh. I didn't know how she would feel. She never stopped fighting. Scared of me? Nah. Im just an innocent sweet babe.

So other than her, i would show people my tattoo when the fought. "You and I. You and her. We all come from the same place. We are all Indians! Look at me! My tattoo! It hurt! For no reason and I didn't want it to! Lets just get over it and heal ourselves in our souls the Indian way!"

They had saw. Some had taken photos. They knew it hurt. It swelled up. It was red. Imflammed but not infected. Like anger of the hearts.

I shouldn't had to prove we suffered

So I ask those asking or demanding reparations, please don't.

We don't all have benefits. And we have pain and suffering. And a lot is jealousy because some tribes have more than others.

If you get reparations, i fear the ramifications.

"Oh them ni**ers got shit and we didn't"

Babes. Sometimes it just time to let go.

Just let it go, baby.

I can't think of my family's land and mansion under water. Flooded. I get punched in the fucking heart. And it hurts. It hurts so bad

I ain't a piece of trash. Following a dam creek so fucking far just to climb what looked like another mountain. Fuck that.

Then they flood it. Fuck you back.

Fuck you back. Fuck you back. They said. FUCK YOU. BECAUSE YOU DIDNT WANT TO BE RAPED AND WOUNDED AND YOU TOOK US TO THE MIDDLE OF THE COUNTRY ON YOUR BARE FEET AND HALF YOU DIED ALONG THE WAY BECAUSE WE BEAT AND RAPED YOU ANYWAY. FUCK YOU BACK FOR NO REASON THAT YOU WERE ALIVE AND IN OUR NEW WORLD FIRST.

OUR NEW WORLD. FUCK YOU. PIECE OF TRASH.

Lost city of Atlantis. People look for it by Greece and shit. Its just in Oklahoma.

We came from Atlanta. "Fine this can be your new Atlas location" said the Spaniards..

But they were too nice. Christopher Columbus was too nice. Spaniards brought food and shelters. But we we're afraid of them. Their odd food, and so on. We did not know what they were. We didn't recognize any one. When we went to Florida they did go with. It was exploration to them. Running away to us. They followed, just curious.

Then we understood. They were like children playing. Innocent. They followed. They kept us safe.

They knew we were afraid once there was a ravine. Their scouts spotted it. They knew we ran our horses too fast and we would all died. They raced ahead in the night while we camped and they all stood to block us off. 100 feet from the edge they formed a line of their own bodies to stop us.

That is when we knew we could trust the Spaniards. So we went scout back to Atlanta to see what happened there. And to tell what had occurred. That our lives had been saved.

Then we took court. We camped near side them for 10 days to decide how much of our lives we should give. Reports came back that 100% trust would be accurate. And so slowly we allowed the "wapuauhaluani" to lean into the Spaniards to truly see what they were all about.

We became friends.

But the whites took over the country. And we all lost.

So I understand what my brothers and sisters and my ma's and pas and little babies in the African American community is going through.

From the eyes of my current life as a registered 1/16 Native American, 23andme says only 3%

As a person to get a tattoo to stop war after I did so many years of community work in the Black Panthers where obviously I am not black any more and I was accepted.

I know what it feels like to be white and hated.

I know what it feels like to be hated for the color of my skin.

As a white person.

But fully accepted into the black community..

So excuse me when I go to a state that has an actual African American population and I just sit and stare looking like a true jack ass.

I just feel like myself. I feel complete. And I feel accepted.

And so not all of you know me. I do work in South America and all over the globe and i treat them all the same.

Reparations, i am afraid. I know and I believe will have repercussions this day and age.

So now Altlanta. Where i am from. My tribe was all brown there. Is now black.

I don't be ignorant and hate them because they took over my town.

That's not why i say. I say because it happens to everyone else.

And so I plan to treat people all the same. We do the DNA4U paid education and quizzes. And i know its not what you ask but it is done by the Tree of Infinite Knowledge.

And right now I'm just a POW and i can't do more than what I can.

But all you beautiful people that is gonna survive. I promise you.

Every single person on this Earth has suffered.

Every single person will get rewards for living. Every thing will be okay..

I know it's not today. Today is the fight for our beautiful children in this world and ourselves.

Its not almost over yet its not just beginning.

This is the orgasm state. Orgasm. So intense and wild and pleasurable and exhausting.

What comes after? Bliss and peace.

Tree keeps telling me two to four years more

My babies, it sounds so long. But every time he says 2 years I say "Well at least it's only 2"

I ask him 3 times a week. "How long is it now?"

We are gonna be okay.

You know those books that you pick the ending? What you do effects it?

Sometimes you can do 5 different things and the ending is the same?

People. I saw call it the "plandemic"

Trust me, it's planned so hard core the black hole feels it. We will win.

I gave up my only child. She was 4 years old. In 2008. I have a clone. And her spirit comes sometimes in it. And sometimes it's other ghosts.

People were wondering why I was crying the other day when I was driving. And I didn't want to say.

My daughter is in prison now. To keep her safe. You cannot imagine the intense fear I have every single day. And I don't even understand myself as for why.

I can see my daughter and she's safe and she's happy and laughing. But... She's a divine clone. My parents made her and the evil aliens took my real daughter.

They call her Sophia. She volunteered. Well. Voluntold. She said "someone needs to fix this! I was born on Martin Luther King's (Jr) birthday of his I have a dream speech and I have a dream too! For someone to fix this!!"

And my mom said from the dead, "I have a proposal"

Like I'm screaming and already bawling but u stop myself because she goes straight out of body and stands in front of my mom.

Its so beautiful. Then it is like a horrible Disney Fairytale curse.

"So i just want you to say yes and don't think about anything and don't think about your mom. She's hurt. Remember her back is broke? Now back to Martin Luther King. Yoh can make all dreams come true. You can be the Hero for the whole entire world because your dad is a mess and you can change this from oh 47 years to about 12 what do you think about that?"

"Yes!! I do! I want that! What do you think mom?"

And i could only stare at how beautiful mu child is. And I felt the horrific horror of how the Queen or fairy God mother puts the whole town to sleep for the curse and you know i began to bawl.

In our past lives. She wasnt the brave one. She was the first born. And she was always with me. Over protective like crazy. Someone was always watching just to make sure she breathed right and had all she needed immediately. Never went out. Always had 7 layers of guards between her and the outside world.

And my mom of all people was telling her to go free and go Just walk in the front door of evil to live.

I was proud. And joyful and in complete agony.

I had to do what was right.

God didn't send his only begotten son to die on the cross. That never haoend.

But a Goddess gave birth to a girl after having sex. And the aliens that attempted to kill her on a cross, named her Jesus and wrote a shameful book about her called the Bible. With nothing but lies. And that Jesus. The real Jesus. The Only Jesus. Sent her only daughter into the pits of Earths most Evil to destroy it with dreams.

So we will all suffer for two to four more years..

For that child to allow us to finish our work.

And no one will say the word reparations again. They will simply say "thank you, I am happy with the changes"

My mom promised me and my daughter.

Due to the True Annabelle parading around as Sophia (now in my prison and went swimming with a historical sibling that was born in a lifetime different than this in their shared hall cell) we are down to two to four years as opposed to 35.

So please quit fucking with Christopher Columbus.

The statues that are being taken down by states will be placed when it's safe to do so in places Christopher Columbus loved, if that is okay with every one else.

Robert E Lee as well. Tree has already publicly listed our blessed that we were so lucky to have that ARE heros for Earth.

Obviously not all white people are bad. But they used to be. Back then. Obviously I am 95% White according to 23 and me.

We had an emergency situation. So we changed the skin of all people not on the Africa continent to white. That os on the non American side. Later after invasions we changed all our good to brown.

This way. Because the invading aliens were so power full. So #1 is protect.

So Northern Europe was changed to white from Negro in order to blend in with the invaders. This way invaders in that,area,didn't know who to kill.

So,obviously invading in Ireland was red heads and white skin.

Sweden, yellow hair and white skin.

So we instantly did that.

Then because of information they would continue to invade that area, we kept them the aliens color.

So all of us except the negros are the color of aliens.

But the Zulululu kills and invades the body with their souls. So now African color folks have alien as well as every other color..

And that is why I'm fed the fuck up.

Im killing every fucking alien i don't agree with.. We did 12 years of intensive studies. In 1994 we jailed ass holes like Trump and more. And this is the end result.

THIS IS THE APOCALYPSE..

Y'all Jesus been here 35 years.. And i want to kill myself. This Earth. I just wanna blow it up and start all over. But I'm stubborn.

And I'm PISSED the fuck off.

And i have a child willing to risk her life until age 16.

Like the damdesr Princess in the world.

So every one will get the land they are owed.

African Americans. Remember VIKINGS.. Our babies, our brothers and sisters our elderly had their land stolen.

People in Africa. The Middle East.

I had to tear down a dam wall in the middle of Germany.

Okay?

I'm here and i hate it.