#I need someone to tell me they’ve done the same shit so I feel less embarassed for being a nuisance LMAO | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

unknownjpegs · 1 year ago

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movie

Halfway through the movie, the body next to him relaxes. An ever so slight shift, but Benji notices; doesn’t even really mean to notice, except he’s just…tuned in. Like the station in his brain, between channels, has been cleared. Buncha noise in the background, of course. He has long accepted that his brain works that way. Not that it doesn’t work, which is how he sometimes felt as a kid, but that it works a certain way.

So all that static and noise is there, and he can pluck congruent thoughts out with a bit of effort. Sometimes not a lot of it. His hand trails across the stark white hotel comforter, palms a thigh — recently, it’s not taken a much at all. Because he’s been tuned in to a certain station and he starts to notice things, like how —

He’s about to say something about that, comes one of those clear thoughts abruptly.

“Dude, did you see the wicked roundhouse on that guy in the back? Holy shit.”

Benji squeezes the lightly fuzzed skin beneath his hand and smiles. “Nasty.”

Xavier glances down at the touch, eyebrow wrinkled for a second as if his brain has to catch up. “Hn,” he grunts, because Benji’s hand flexes again with a bit more purpose. “How much would you hate me if I said I kinda…forgot that’s what we were doing.”

That pulls a laugh from him, and he’s gotta wiggle closer and fold into Xavier’s side.“Not at fuckin’ all.”

Because his brain is tuned in, a channel to focus on. Because the word hate anywhere near Xavier is so absurd. They’re here, lit up in the flashing technicolor of an old kung fu movie, because Benji feels like this:

By this point, the band’s done enough touring to know that they all operate at peak if they break it up a bit. So they’ve got an east, they’ve got a central, a west, a south. They go states to Europe, break that up too. Discover, unsurprisingly, there is far less bickering and drama and theatrics if they allow themselves to work and play in healthy tandem.

Last few weeks of the southern state rotation is when Benji notices: one of the sound techs likes Xavier.

Which is fine.

So many people like Xavier. And a lot of the techs like him. He’s likable, that way. Personable. Scary sometimes, when he’s guard mode, but likable the rest. He gets attention and hovering, slightly careful adoration the same way a tail-wagging guard dog from two cute breeds receives it.

People like Xavier. But sometimes they like Xavier. And Benji can tell every single time.

Liking Xavier is also, Benji understands, normal. And fine, because it’s normal. It is just that he can tell, and when it’s blatant, when the appreciation is not covert whatsoever, is when he gets a bit miffed.

And yeah, so maybe the appreciation is rarely covert. Maybe Benji spends a whole lot of time miffed, because it is Xavier. He is approachable, and so people approach. But his friendly smile is often colored shy even if it’s big and toothy. Shaky-handed crayon drawn smile. Boyish, but hesitant.

Like he’s saying, please say what you mean or I’m just standing here, what’s going on?

Benji can’t do much but sit back and watch it happen. Watch people flirt with Xavier all the time. Which is fine.Because ultimately they trust each other implicitly. It’s the other people that get him. It’s the fucking hesitant, careful smile that comes out on occasion. It doesn’t make him jealous. It makes him protective. Like when he’s sat up on the kit, watching someone lean in close and watching Xavier’s shoulders round, Benji is the chained animal instead. Baring teeth.

Give him space. He needs more space than that.

So people appreciate. And fucking fine, maybe Benji wishes they wouldn’t. He wishes he didn’t feel annoyed about it, because it is unfair, isn’t it?

Benji has constantly gotta put that cool, confident grin on when he’d rather sneer, and the groupies can’t see past the facade of friendliness to the teeth-bare request for space underneath. So they hang around. And Benji knows Xavier watches that.

Little mutual, torturous prison of their own making. Watching and being watched and watching and being watched. Steam away alone in a pot; I know you bone-deep stock and you hate when someone does that meat and that was a fake laugh, wasn’t it vegetables.

He wishes he weren’t stuck behind the kit during soundcheck and rehearsals, made to observe from that vantage point.

A tech likes Xavier. And Benji watches as a tech, whose name he knows but absolutely does not care to remember in that moment, sidles up to Xavier. Flirts.

Benji can deal with it. He trusts Xavier without question, of course. And, because most of the time he looks apologetic, confused or even annoyed. Softens, makes himself smaller. And Benji thinks fake laugh, wasn’t it. I know you and you hate when someone does that and that was a fake laugh.

Jealousy isn’t what makes him get up at the half-point of the show, when the stage lights have dimmed off and they’ve got the cover of darkness. The crowd’s tittering; pit’s disbanded and a lulling hum of hundreds of separate conversation settles over them like a blanket. He can look out at the crowd and see blue-light fireflies, screen illuminated excited, emotional faces. Usually loves that part.

Except he is not looking out over the crowd, he’s looking at the unnamed sound tech who has sidled up to Xavier and is leaning on the speaker next to his designated spot.

Benji gets up from the kit. Bit of a wave of excited chatter at the front line when he does so, because sometimes he likes to go and prattle at them. Ask how they’re liking it, maybe take a picture.

Instead, the big speaker hides him as he prowls around to the edge of the stage.

“You mind findin’ me a water, mate?” Benji asks. He’s close enough that he doesn’t need to shout above the crowd but does anyway — makes the tech jump. Xavier, who is largely used to him appearing for a visit like this, does not.

“I don’t — ” The tech starts, maybe wants to add do that kind of thing or think I’m your assistant or want to, but Benji glares. So the tech balks and scurries off to find him a water that he doesn’t need and won’t drink.

The moment they’re alone, or as alone as they can get in this circus, he crouches down.

Xavier tilts his head back at an absurd angle, grinning wide. Sweet face caught and halved between the shivery darkness and meager light. Benji’s chest squeezes.

Thanks, that expression says. He slides a hand into Xavier’s sweat-slick hair and leans in to put his mouth to Xavier’s temple. Don’t thank me yet.

“Gotta stop letting me do that.” Because it can’t be healthy. “Makes me want to fuck you even worse.”

The hand in that pretty hair digs tight. Enough of a blunt, edgy thrill of pain for his mouth to pop open a centimeter. His eyes dart around, eyebrows submissively angled in a way that makes Benji smirk. He’s glad for the shadow of the speakers and their bit of privacy. Lets him push and prod and tease a little more.

“We totally can —” Xavier says, throat bobbing on a whine when Benji yanks. Channel static clear, Benji knows he would follow it up with something like please, let’s somewhere, let’s lock the bus, we can tonight, I want you to, I want to, I want it.

“Nah. I think I’d need,” Benji interrupts, pulling his coiled earpiece out as he leans closer. He presses his nose into the messy ruffle atop Xavier’s head, right above where his fingers twist. Lips to his ear: “I need a whole weekend with you. Minimum.”

He waits for that to sink in. Gives it a good second, let’s it dangle there. When Xavier’s pupils expand, he offers the rest. The truth.

“Want it to be in my bed. If, y’know, we’re unclear on that. I really want to fuck you that first time in my bed. I’ve got this nice secluded place you’d like.” He’s grinning now, because that security stamped chest is getting rapid on breaths. “Which is good, huh, that it’s secluded. ‘Cuz I bet you are proper fuckin’ loud. You seem like the type, mate. Huh, Xavier? Would you get loud if I fuck you? ”

Xavier’s mouth drops open now. Noiseless — whatever sound he makes is lost as Matilda tests a few keys, scales the note Lark chases as he warms up. Break’s over.

Still, despite the crowd and the sounds of practice before they swing back into the rest of the set, Benji can hear the echo of that noise. What it might sound like if Xavier had any breath to offer for it. And he knows he’s right about the volume, so he laughs.

Laughs and slides his hands over broad shoulders, uses them as leverage to push and rise from his crouch.

“Yeah, knew it.” He drops a farewell kiss, later sort of promise, to the top of his head as he steps back. Visible again, in the spotlight. “Good boy.”

He acts that way because he feels like this, too:

This close to the end of tour, celebration of a successful country-hop looming, the bus is left empty. The quietest it’s ever been, void of music or clamoring voices or late night movie watch parties or the overly loud bubble of a bong and Mouse’s adorable shrieking laugh.

Instead, everyone is tired and achey and grumpy enough that separate rooms, privacy, is a necessity as essential as water and air.

During the last few shows, where they’re mostly playing big venues in even bigger cities, Benji likes to indulge. And likes to indulge others. Their tour budget doesn’t ever go to lodging, nowadays. Bunny can’t always make miracles happen, and even if she could without requesting some souls out of the deal, everyone prefers the money to go elsewhere. Merch designers, supporting acts, guest performers, techs, equipment.

So Benji drops quite a lot of money to get everyone their own rooms. Nowadays, his bank account has more numbers than he’s got the capacity to understand or knows what to do with.

He spends a bit of it on a good hotel. It’s got a fancy rooftop pool, so late one evening they all thump, loud and raucous and laughing in their way, down the hall and outside.

Chef, Sunshine’s ever-present partner, challenges everyone to a cannonball contest. He wins each round, obviously. Lark and Matilda, despite their insane unspoken cohesion, are no match for Benji and Mouse in a game of chicken. Despite the latter being a shorter duo, Benji’s got the stance to keep them upright and Mouse gets fucking feral when she’s competitive.

She leaps on top of Lark when she’s done, dunking him and Matilda both. They’re all laughing when Benji glances over. Check-in.

Xavier stretches out in a lounge chair at the pool’s edge with Ewan and Matilda’s petite blue-haired friend. The trio is engaged in conversation, but Xavier has one of those smiles on; there’s a rich, prim looking brunette business woman across the width of the pool in a chair of her own. She keeps giving them glances. Like glances.

Whether for Ewan or him is unclear. The attention is enough. Benji’s heart is in his throat, anger bubbling close after it, when he sees Xavier tug his shirt back over his head. When his shoulders round. When his eyes dart anywhere but over there.

Benji nudges Mouse aside, swims over to the edge and gets out.

It’s only six, but he puts a hand on the top of Xavier’s head. Sighs like he’s tired. “M’done in. Wanna call it?” Ewan ooohs with a snicker. “Aw, suck your mum.”

“Yours,” Ewan teases back, and with his insane wingspan reaches up to tug the towel up from Benji’s shoulders and cover his face.

When he gets free, Xavier’s smiling a bit more like himself.

It’s really a matter of miracles that they make it all the way down the hall, through the elevator ride, and nearly to Benji’s door before they’re on each other.

All it takes is Xavier whining “Jeeeesus Christ” in the way Benji likes, big palm sweeping water droplets across the still-damp dip of his spine, for Benji to get him against the wall.

“For the record,” Xavier gasps between frantic, rough presses of their mouths, “this is insane. This is….like. Insane.” His hands are trailing from Benji’s face down his shoulders.

“What?” Benji kisses his chin, his lower lip. “Snogging out here?”

Xavier makes a hm, yeah that too sort of noise. “I mean you, dude.” One hand digs fingernails into Benji’s shoulder, making him hiss. The other flattens over his chest. “You’re… you’re wet Benji, and you’re so — you — ugh. You make me feel like I need a lobotomy. But actually,” his nose wrinkles cutely, “I think actually, yeah, I just need you to fuck me.”

Benji shivers at that, the mental image. The inability to string together a sentence. Makes him feel as if he’s not alone in the dizziness of being so close together, looking at Xavier, touching him and even thinking of touching him. Sharing warmth. His mouth against the warm column of his neck curls sharp.

“M’not fucking you here,” he laughs, and that’s the only thing pitched high in the whole sentence. The rest is a low, careful growl.

They’re in the middle of the hallway, no privacy except the warning of footsteps down the hall. But still, anybody could walk by — and Benji kind of doesn’t hate the idea of that, if he’s honest. He’d actually really prefer someone to walk by. See Xavier pinned flushed and wide-eyed. All that, because of what Benji’s doing and where he’s touching and what he’s saying. Embarrassed and keyed up because of him — nobody else.

Benji is, quite frankly, a little bit tired of people looking at Xavier like he does. Which isn’t fair because it is understandable. It, after all, is Xavier. Friendly and approachable. Radiating that energy of you can talk to me I’m safe but also I look pretty in just about any scenario you can imagine me in; which he is, and which Benji does. Frequently. Is doing right now.

It’s simply that he knows others are doing the same. And that is why he probably wouldn’t be able to manage any sort of guilt or shame, if the very real scenario of someone rounding the corner were to occur. Honestly, Benji would only manage a self-satisfied smirk tossed over his shoulder. A glare, maybe, a knowingly quirked eyebrow. But satisfied and possessive because: Yeah, wish you were me, huh? You’re not though. Too fucking bad.

“Okay well that’s kind of lame,” Xavier manages breathlessly. “I think I need at least three really solid reasons why it’s not on the table.”

“I already told you. It is on the table — heh, can be on a table if you want. I wanna see you in my bed.” He speaks slow and clear, meaning every word.

The hand cupping Xavier’s neck slips up, fingers dancing into his hair. Not pulling quite yet, because Benji knows the anticipation gets to him as much as that inevitable mean tug. “And also I want to kiss you in it.”

He gets himself up to his toes, takes a proper grip. Pulls him down enough brush their mouths together.

“And I really, really wanna fuck you in it, Xavier.” He hums a laugh. “Into it, if I can manage.”

Xavier whimpers, fingers snapped up to lock around the wrist of the wet hand Benji’s got fisted and locked tight in his shirt. There’s chlorine-water seeping into the fabric, darkening it. When Benji drags him down for another open-mouthed kiss, that spot spreads taut over a nipple. He pulls away, their mouths noisy about it, and his eyes fall to the fabric. Lock there, tongue between his teeth.

Bite, he thinks, so he laves over it. Tastes cotton and bitter chemical and Xavier, underneath.

“Oh, man, I’m gonna —” Xavier starts breathily, giggling high and hysterical, his back arching away from the wall. Benji cuts him off with a firm, quick kiss.

“Sound so pretty when you cum?” He presses on, insistently dragging teeth over his pink bottom lip. “Yeah, don’t doubt it.”

Now Xavier breaks away and drops his head back against the wall with a noise that goes straight to the recesses of Benji’s brain. Sits heady and echoing in his skull. He’d ideally sound just like that — during.

“Christ, this is unfair. I am literally going to fucking die, Benji.” He whines. The vibration of it is still in his throat when Benji kisses down it as his mouth goes out of reach. Those big hands coast up his back and dig into his hair, drawing a soft, content sigh from him. “I am going to die.”

Benji kisses the center of his chest. Means for that to be it. But his nose brushes the fabric of the t-shirt and that a strange combination of pool and Xavier. Something sweet, too, like he’d spilled sour-sugar candy dust on himself.

“You are going to fucking die of diabetes, is what you’re gonna die from. All that candy.” He chuckles. Lifts up to plant one more kiss on Xavier’s chin, and then slips back out of reach. He puts himself back against the wall opposite where Xavier leans.

“Nuh-uh. It’s going to be from critical levels of no dick in mouth.”

Benji laughs a bit too loud for this quiet hallway so late at night. “You’re fuckin’ awful.”

“You love it.”

He shrugs. “Yeah.” Love you.

They stare at each other, Benji with a grin that makes his cheeks hurt and Xavier with a bludgeoned, half-lidded expression that makes it widen even more. They stare at each other, green on brown, across the narrow hotel hall.

It’s difficult to keep that distance. Benji hands aren’t shaking so much as they are vibrating, dancing with energy that beckons him to reach out and touch once more. Had a taste, a handful, and want it again.

“Wanna come back to mine and — ”

“Yes.”

“—and watch…fuck’s sake.” Benji huffs, shaking his head. “And watch a movie?”

“Sigh,” Xavier says, instead of actually doing it. Pouts even as he nods. He pushes off the wall and moves, in that strangely graceful way, to take up the space between them again. Benji’s warmed by the hands that brush up his sides, rest at his ribs. Looms over him in the way that doesn’t make him feel small or short but…appreciated. Finding the difference, adapting sweetly.

“I guess I could. You’re gonna have to walk in front of me though, dude.”

His lips are pulled in that big, toothy grin that lights his whole face. That has Benji warm in the chest, fuzzy in the center of his forehead — like there’s a sixth sense blinking there, Xavier sense. Filling him up with fog. His’s heart is hammering and a quick glance down tells him he’s honestly not in much better a state.

“I think—” One of Xavier’s free hand slaps over his mouth suddenly.

“Benji,” he whines. “I love listening to you talk, okay? But please shut up. Give me two seconds to recover, you fucking dick demon.”

Benji grins beneath his palm. I love listening to you talk, he thinks, I love you, period, and then licks a truly disgusting amount of spit over Xavier’s skin.

“Eugh,” he sneers. Before Benji can duck away, Xavier smears that hand over the side of his face. Benji huffs and shoves at his stomach, and Xavier pushes him away by the shoulders, and then they’re shoving and elbowing and knocking together down the hall. Certainly laughing a little too loud, and stomping a little too hard. Caring… not at all.

The hotel room is every dollar well spent. second they get through the door, Xavier launches himself onto the giant bed, stretched fully out.

“Holy shit,” he laughs, pedaling his legs and then dropping them. They don’t hang off the end of the bed. Benji’s smiling while he pulls off Xavier’s trainers.

“Better than a bunk, yeah?”

Xavier sits up to his elbows, grinning too. “Dunno, dude. Lots of good memories in that thing.”

“Sticky ones.” Benji agrees with a snicker. But that’s not all, because they’d curled up together to watch videos or play a game on Xavier’s phone or just chat shit until someone had yelled at them to be quiet. And even then, they’d laid crammed together in that small space, sharing air, heads tilted together and whispering and trying so fucking hard not to give each other the giggles.

Benji’s grinning while he meanders over to the chair by the empty side of the bed, where his bag sits, and retrieves a pair of sweats. With his back to Xavier, he tugs his shirt over his head and the still-damp swim shorts down. Leaves them in a heap on the floor, which he knows he really shouldn’t. More important matters, anyway.

Quick glance over his shoulder, trailing pointedly from Xavier’s slack-jawed expression and down his reclined body. “Gonna sleep in your jeans mate, or you want to borrow some sweats?”

“Uh. You,” Xavier says, voice tight, “You’re going to have to not be naked if you want me to answer questions.”

Benji ducks his head with a laugh. Pulls up a pair of boxers for himself (laughs again at Xavier’s wheezy, disappointed whine) and then tosses him a spare pair of sleep pants. They land on Xavier’s chest, and he white-knuckle grips one of the legs.

The tension is thick as Xavier stands and pulls the black jumper over his head, unbuttons his jeans. Takes him a second, because they’re staring at each other, and his fingers falter and fumble at the clasp.

“Need a hand —”

“Dude. Please,” Xavier croaks, eyes big and dark and intense as Benji kneels up on the bed, walks on his knees across it, nice and slow. Stops in front of him, their chests nearly touching. “Jesus fucking Christ, Benji.”

He’s smirking something awful when he slips fingers into Xavier’s belt loops to pull him closer (not necessary, they’re already so close), unclasps the button and pulls his zipper down. It’s absurdly, comically loud in the quiet room. Well — quiet besides the sharp, quick breaths Xavier lets out. They slip a bit more audible, higher and needy, because —

“You okay? What’re you feeling?” Benji asks quietly, hands resting on Xavier’s bare hips.

“So many fucking things,” he mutters through clenched teeth. He leans down, drops his head to Benji’s bare shoulder, and tugs the sweats up his long legs. “Murderous, like, number one. Also hard.”

He’s not lying. Benji hums and pulls away, letting his fingers brush the front of his underwear as they part, where the evidence of his teasing in the hallway is very clear and still very present.

Except Benji doesn’t do anything about that. Not yet, anyway. He throws himself down to the bed and finds the remote, flips through the channels for something to watch while Xavier stands there.

Well? His raised eyebrows say, and Xavier shudders out a long, shaky breath.

“Fuck you.”

Benji smiles like a content cat and pats the spot beside him.

So, yes. He waits until they’re halfway through the movie, when Xavier’s guard is down, to touch again. Because he thinks about Xavier the way he does, feels the way he does, and likes making a mess of it. Winding him up when he thinks they’re meant to wind down.

“You act like you hate me,” Xavier grumbles petulantly. He crosses his arms for a moment and then opens them when Benji tucks in, wraps an arm around his torso and cups his side. Palm flat over his ribs.

Xavier does not sigh or grumble or whine when Benji finds the remote and turns the movie off. Has has got no doubt Xavier has seen this one before, and that there are more pressing matters at hand.

“Well, don’t,” Benji chuckles, mouth to his freckled shoulder. There’s only a brief sweep of shyness that brushes over him, fingers down the spine, before he offers: “I love you quite a fuckin’ lot, actually.”

Xavier snickers and says it back, love you too, laugh stuck to the words. And then his face slackens at the newness. “Oh.”

Oh. Easy as, isn’t it?

“Oh.” Repeats it with a smile in his voice, pushed up on an elbow to look at Xavier. His face is the most colorful Benji’s ever seen it, freckles flung across his nose like muddy paint on a red canvas. He touches a thumb to one of those pink cheeks. “Alright?”

“No,” Xavier squeaks, and then clears his throat. “Yeah. Fuck yes. Uh —”

“Wanna be better?”

“Yes, oh. Please, Benji —”

Sounds like he’s about to unravel entirely, so Benji leans up and over. Offers a grounding, firm kiss. A kiss that starts slow and gentle. Starts soft. Chaste and sweet and tinged with novelty from that shared confession.

But it’s them. Novelty is fleeting next to the satisfied, joyful ache that pulses almost physical between them. It’s the emotion swirling in the moment, and its bodies pressed together and solid.

But it’s them. So it doesn’t take long for the kiss to deepen.

Before long, they’re side by side and facing each other. Entwined yet teasingly separate, hands roaming, connection of lips, teeth, and tongue ebbing. It progresses naturally but quick, frenzied and a bit wild. Connecting, tiny parts of air, disconnecting noisy and then back messy and them, over and over.

Pulling back to look at each other, to touch fingertips to warm cheeks or kiss-bitten mouths. They’ll part, and then one or both of them will hungrily dart back in; Xavier’s got a hand in his hair and Benji folds a palm over the swell of his lower back, falling down to squeeze unapologetically. He feels dizzy and they’re both panting.

“W-what — what’s the plan here?” Xavier groans. His hips are rocking a bit, keyed up from the teasing and the kiss. There’s a pink sheen all over him, on the tops of his shoulders and his nose and down his chest and fuck, even right above the cut of his briefs. Benji didn’t even know people could blush like that, all over, until Xavier. Had never experienced wanting to only see it on one person in particular, until Xavier.

What’s the plan? Fucking anything. Everything. Nothing, too; he could just do this, look and look and look at Xavier, and be content. He’s beautiful lying there (doing anything), lip tucked between his teeth and eyes hooded. Wanting more but not ever pushing for it, feverishly eager but docile at nothing more than Benji…looking at him.

And maybe, if they were in his bed, not this one, Benji would touch more. Pull him off the mattress and touch him and into the shower and touch him and get him ready and then fuck him. See what other noises he can pull out with his tongue and Xavier on his back, or cock and Xavier on his stomach or —

Fuck, anything. Everything.

Instead, Benji shakes his head, tendrils of hair brushing his cheek and sticking; still wet from the pool. Wet on the pillow. Not his pillow, not his bed. He grins at Xavier.

“How about this?”

He holds Xavier’s foggy, lidded gaze as the fabric gets bunched around his thighs. Stares at that beautiful, pleasured-slacked face even as his green eyes drop. As they fall lower down his body, Xavier does that specific noise. It’s the one Benji thinks he maybe isn’t aware he makes. He scoots closer.

Benji brushes a palm down his stomach, over the pale, soft dip. The muscles of his abdomen jump beneath the touch, and that makes his grin slacken, soft and fond. Fucking eager.

Might watch with eager eyes of his own as he tugs the fabric down for Xavier, too. Might lick his lips, a subconscious reaction, because yeah. All of Xavier blushes.

Benji takes himself in hand and nudges Xavier’s calf with his knee. Nice clear go on to that, a silent command. Xavier huffs and follows it, long fingers curling. Benji wants to take a picture of his knuckles like that, cock peeking out, hips pink and maybe blurred in frame with how they’re rocking.

“Might as well —” He sucks in a breath, hisses it out slow. Xavier is staring at him, eyelashes fluttering already. “— kill two birds, or whatever.”

“Or whatever,” Xavier breathes, and finally blinks. “Shit.”

“You stopped.” He glances down, though his focus stays on himself for just a second before it rolls towards Benji’s body, the soft, petting tease of his hand.

“God.”

“Xavier.” Benji huffs, airy with laughter at the monosyllabic, empty-headed tone, the stunned look about him. He slides his free hand up Xavier’s chest to rest over his heart. Brush a thumb over a nipple. “G’on.”

He tosses his head back, nodding desperately. The motion of his hand speeds up so Benji mirrors it, jaw clenched with the effort it takes not to speed up even more, chase right over the edge.

“Damn, Xavier,” Benji laughs throatily. The noise is rough, makes the syllables splinter with a hitching breath. “You’re just so fuckin’ —” Wonderful, kind, hot, short-tempered, hilarious, gorgeous, infuriating, impatient, humble, sweet. “Just everything, y’know that?”

Xavier makes a questioning sort of whine, eyebrows pinching tight as he drops his chin forward. Against Benji’s with a little knock that oughta hurt, but doesn’t. They stare at each other. Noises of their hands are dry, so Benji stops him with a soft touch to his arm and lifts Xavier’s hand to his mouth, spits into it.

“Bein’ helpful,” Benji teases, an innocent what’d I do? quirk to his brow, because Xavier glares at him.

How fucking dare you do that, right now?

Benji smirks. And I’ll do it some more. Tell me not to. Xavier makes a noise close to a sob. Benji, smug, smugly traces a blue vein running between the neatly etched tattoos on his forearm. Thought so. Fuck.

“Hate — hn, fucking — hate you, oh —Benj.” Protesting, but fist around himself again, mouth twisted into an annoyed but cute smile, brows tight in disbelief and pleasure. Ends it, of course, on a throaty whine.

“Love you,” he cheekily, just to say it. To drag out another sobbing moan.

Benji tilts his chin for a good angle to catch that, swallow it up and kiss it away. Messy. Tongue on Xavier’s bottom lip, a kiss glancing off to the side. Hard to connect it as they tug at themselves and pant. More noises, ‘cuz Xavier’s louder — always fucking is Benji think — and the hotly pitiful sounds of them are quickly doing him in.

“Feel good, gorgeous, yeah, looks like it really fucking does.” And Xavier’s lips are parting, an audibly shaky breath escaping Benji — Benji knows that expression well. “You’re close, already, huh? F-fuck, so soon, hand’s that good. It is, trust me.” He huffs. “Gonna cum for me?”

Xavier nods again, but it’s like watching him move in a dream; jittery, slow. His eyes have that haze to them, darting from his face down his chest and lower, lingering there, rolling back up. Further up to the ceiling, and that makes Benji laugh — groaning, affectionate.

Even mores when his unoccupied hand shoots out, warm and massive, to fold around his own free wrist, drag it upwards towards his chest.

“Ah, lazy,” he chides, shaking himself from the grip and sliding his own palm deliberately past a pectoral, over a shivering shoulder and into mussed hair. Cups the back of his neck, shakes him a bit. “Do it yourself.” His eyes narrow, smirk widening. “Yeah, actually — yeah, do it yourself Xavier. Lemme see.”

Again, Xavier leaps to do as told.

Benji watches him paw at himself, thinks maybe that blush should stay in place. Everywhere, right where it is, every inch of skin, for a moment longer. Wants to see if maybe it’ll deepen, if Xavier’s face can manage another step darker, if he’ll start —

Benji swallows, cock jumping in his hand. Maybe start begging. Only because sometimes, when he looks at Xavier and there’s that warmth spreading in his chest (in his gut too, like it is now, ache in the base of his spine and full, complete contentedness in the center of him) that all Benji thinks he can manage is begging, too.

Please fucking cum, please do it, do it at the same time, please because I wanna watch you feel good and you deserve it. You deserve so much fucking good, at least let me give you this, come on.

“Not yet,” Benji grunts, because he’s close and Xavier sounds it too and he can’t help himself but be a little stingy. Because he wants to watch a moment longer, wants to like Xavier, look at him, his, his.

Xavier gasps, a bit irritated like Benji’s just denied him something important — has, he supposes, amusement coursing through him as much as the heat and promise of release and adoration. Those eyes pop open, shiny. Swimming and bobbing, pond-clear and vibrant. Teared at the edges. “Please,” he tries, “Fucking love you, oh.”

And he can’t say no to that, can only let out a series of colorful, bitten-off swears. Barrages Xavier with such a flurry of compliments that he does go that extra shade, try and tuck his face in the pillow and shy away from it. Benji squeezes the back of his neck, pulls at his hair, holds their faces close.

“Look at me, Xavier,” and when he does: “Love you.”

And that’s it: Benji’s breath catches high on the next rise, tensing all over, and as he pants through it the hears through distant ring in his ears, Xavier doing the same simultaneously, staccato whines dropping from him.

Good timing, his brain offers when it shrugs and hits the reset switch and does a little stretch to get back to work. Pops a cigarette in its mouth, satisfied.

Benji refocuses.

Big green eyes on him, pupils still blown. Catching air desperately, big recovery lungfuls that expand his pink chest. Color’s draining away, which makes Benji pout a bit, which makes him realize Xavier, or him, had managed to shoot so far as his chin. To Xavier’s bewildered and almost angry-sounding moan, it’s is quickly swiped up on a tongue.

“Are you kidding,” Xavier heaves, and then tosses himself forward. Their chests knock together, mouths meeting just as forceful, just as sweet. Benji finds his face smushed between two warm (slick) palms, laughing as lips seek his. Find his cheek, his jaw, his nose, his forehead. “Are you fucking — joking me — how — was that — we’re not even,” he’s gasping between kisses. “Fucking.”

“Yet!” Benji chirps, and then breaks into manic, hysterical laughter when he’s pinned to the bed and fingers dig into his side. They tussle a moment until, inevitably, Benji manages to get the upper hand. Gets up, perched on the small of Xavier’s back and firm hands pressing into his shoulders.

“Wanna finish the movie?”

“You are,” Xavier mumbles, shifting in place, “Unforgivable.” He tucks his chin free, finds Benji with an amusement-sparkled eye. “Yes, by the way. But we’re doing that like two more times first.”

“Should probably, if we’re gonna be awhile, schedule up a room service?”

“Man.” A hand slides up his thigh. “I love you.”

And the sandwiches are good, at least for the price. Benji’d make them better though.

#writing #ua #bp #xw #bp x xw #band au

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poisoned-pearls · 1 year ago

Note

AUGH okay so actually I’ve thought about Jamil’s overblot quite a bit!!

Azul knew some parts, but not all, because Jamil didn’t want him to feel guilty about knowing about what was going to come, HOWEVER, he didn’t keep Azul completely in the dark. Azul knew pieces, like how he ‘talked’ to kalim about getting their dorm on the grindstone, but he really didn’t want Azul to get in trouble if it all went to shit.

He also, really, really was a wreck after it was done. He never meant to HARM Azul. Like the first time he’s coming out the blot Azul is running towards him, completely disregarding everything (including the ink, he doesn’t care how dirty him and his clothes get he just needs to hold Jamil) and the first thing Jamil sees is a bruise and he’s just like “I… I did that?” In the most raw voice and it breaks Azul’s heart. Like Azul was is pain the entire overblot but the moment Jamil is out of it he realizes just how badly it shook Jamil.

Despite everything, the last thing he wanted to do was to hurt azul, much less throw him across a whole desert. Like Azul is hurt but nothing hurts more than hearing Jamil absolutely sob while apologizing a million different times. He has to listen to Azul’s weird little heart beat to calm down. (And he listens to Azul’s heartbeat to fall asleep for weeks after that. Azul stayed over at Scarabia for a week or so after the overblot and after that ended he made a recording and bought Jamil a stuffed octopus with said recording in a button)

ALSO YEAH ITS HILARIOUS WITH AZUL ESP. BECAUSE YOU KNOW HIS THOUGHTS ARE JUST “he’s so pretty he’s so pretty go on a date with me please please please FUCK he’s so smart come on please please please please-“ SO WHEN SOMETHING FORCES THOSE THOUGHTS OUT

their first date he went all out (and also called his mom, who then immediately freaked out because her sons only been at school for a MONTH and he has someone he wants to court??? Tell her everything!! She’s already in g talking to his grandma about it and he’s getting a courting gift (his grandmothers shell necklace) EXPEDITED two day shipped up to the surface) He brought a fancy tablecloth, he made them pasta and made the noodles by hand and rolled and shaped them himself, hand made the sauce everything, because he was nervous as all hell. Like he’s trying so hard to impress Jamil.

But also said date is still when he’s having bad body issues, and Jamil complimenting him and his food is not helping, ESPECIALLY the potion (his human potion I firmly believe is like actual medication where it takes a few months to be very solid and like the most convincingly human) so he is BRIGHT blue and even glowing a bit (Jamil finds it very cute and very pretty to look at) and it’s like, the most awkward but fun and adorable first date ever. I don’t think they kisses but I firmly believe they almost did at least a few times

Their Second date is much more relaxed, but also it’s them so it’s not at the same time. It’d be like after a stressful test, and Jamil would grab azul on his way out like “do you wanna.. come over and play a game with me? Maybe catch dinner?” And Azul is just like “yesyesyesyes please-“

They’d start out in Jamil’s room but Jamil would also have THREE other roommates so it’d get really awkward real quickly (because some are trying to study and some just don’t want to see him and Azul’s weird flirting) so they’d pack up the stuff and kinda just wander until they found a private little courtyard where no one else is and then resume where they started.

And god they’d be insufferable. They’re both flirting and fighting and somehow they’ve both become horrible at the game but it doesn’t matter because finally when Jamil wins their 15th round and his 8th win he’d just, pull Azul in and steal a kiss calling it “his prize” and Azul would be dead. Gone. He’s done. The twins are hearing about that for weeks

And yeah!! The twins aren’t nearly as bad because they don’t feel the need to get as much revenge as when he was being CONSTANT about it. Like god azul, shut up- but they only had to deal with like 3 weeks of it, so they make fun of him and tease him, but not like they would normally

also Jamil would become a LOT closer with the twins. He’s their fourth brother now.

Eventually they kinda chill on like, official ‘dates’ and just hang out a lot. Jamil’s there when Azul wins housewarden and he is SO happy for him. He’s the first one out on that field and he’s hoisting Azul up before Floyd could even get to him because it’s all Azul had been working towards.

OH OH AND- THE FIRST PERSON TO EVER EAT IN THE LOUNGE IS HIM AND JAMIL.

Azul calls it their first “official” date because it’s actually like a fancy one, but oh god he’s so whipped. Jamil helped him get all of the processes done and even helped him get Crowley to let him build it (so the lounge became a thing like 3 months earlier than normal) and he’s just. So happy

They’re so silly to me though

❗❗❗❗❗❗

BOTHERING YOU!!! I AM INTERESTED!!!

AUGHH OKAY OKAY SO-

It’s INCREDIBLY similar to canon, that’s like, half of the point. Jamil and Azul have been in the same class for their whole school a career and I firmly believe Azul has HAD a crush on him since their first year even in canon (ex. “I’ve always been curious about you since we were first years.”)

so in this au it happened completely on accident. Since they were only around 3 weeks- a month into school, Jamil didn’t have kalim to worry about yet (who arrived a month later) and azul didn’t have such a large reputation (so Jamil was a little less cautious). Potion project, truth serum. Should be easy right? That was until azul accidentally lost balance and tried to catch himself on the cauldron, sending it all over him and into his mouth.

so when Jamil leans over to ask if he’s okay, because a giant metal thing just tipped over him, the first thing out of his mouth is “great seven you’re gorgeous.”

when Jamil is promptly like “what” Azul literally can not control his tongue and is like “please go on a date with me-“ and Jamil just stares at him for a moment before going “…sure” because, well, hell. He’s free from kalim for the first time in his life, he thinks he’s pretty too, it’s worth a shot and he’s under a truth potion, so at least he knows he finds him attractive. So sure, couldn’t hurt to try.

And it did, in fact, not hurt to try, they snuck their way up the astronomy tower and had a nice dinner that azul made. And they were both, very very happy.

another date later (this time by Jamil, where they played mancala in one of the scarabian common places) and they were official.

And a month later, (a week or so after kalim transferred) Jamil joined basketball and Azul became his number one fan, where a year later Ace learns about his existence from

Azul keeps Jamil from becoming more stressed about kalim, and Jamil uses his study guides to not go insane. Jamil also becomes a third enforcer for the monstro lounge, and knows EXACTLY how everything works, because hell he was there right next to Azul and helping him figure it all out when it was happening. He’ll catch someone trying to run from Azul and his contracts and toss them right back into the shark pit.

theyre also horrible. Like the most couple to ever couple. Jamil waits outside every housewarden meeting to walk with Azul, they always either bring breakfast or coffee for each other (they’ll switch it up on who brings it each day). Hell even Ace originally knew Azul as “Jamil’s boyfriend from octavinelle” during games.

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once-upon-a-thigh · 2 years ago

Text

The Truth

Summary: Wanda’s jealousy leads to disastrous circumstances. PERFECT LITTLE SECRET PART 2. 18+

Pairings: Fem!Reader X Milf! Wanda Maximoff, Yelena Belova X Kate Bishop X Fem!Reader (platonic), Fem! Reader X Carol Danvers (brief)

Class: Series; angst, smut

Warnings: First time writing in second person so I’m sorry for that, large age gap (18/37), mommy kink, possessiveness, strap on sex (r receiving), semi-public sex, exhibitionism, degradation, swearing, arguing.

Words: 4k

Life was easier now that your best friends knew of your secret relationship with your 37-year-old neighbour. The days were going by smoother almost now that there was less to hide. As well as, honestly, it was a relief to you that someone knew. By this point you were so incredibly infatuated with the woman it was nice to be able to express the happiness she brought out of you.

“I’ve never felt this way about anyone Lena. She just makes me feel so good, and I’m not just talking sexually, Wanda makes me feel more like me than I’ve ever felt before,” you gushed, eyes drooped to the table and unable to make eye contact with the blonde.

She pulled a disgusted face. “That’s the corniest shit I’ve ever heard,” she joked, at least you hope she’s joking.

“She sounds amazing Y/n, I just wish you told us earlier,” Kate, your other friend dropped in to the conversation from the chair opposite you.

“I know,” you whined, “but I had no choice, the least amount of people that know, the better. I can’t imagine what my parents would think if they found out.” You shuddered at the thought.

“Maybe they’ll be fine with it!” The sprightly brunette chimed.

“Don’t be an idiot Kate, what would your mother do if you were in the same situation?” Yelena rebutted.

“Probably throw me down the stairs-“ The three of you jumped when Kate’s sentence was interrupted by the slam of a book on the table.

“How many times am I going to have to tell you three to be quiet?” The librarian hissed, leering over you.

“Maybe just one more time?” Yelena chortled, however her laugh cut suddenly when she met the woman’s pierced eyes.

“Get out,” she hissed, causing the three of you to stand and pack your things hastily and rush out of the library, bumping shoulders along the way.

After giggling over the fact that none of you got any of your work done whilst you were there, you said goodbye before attempting to rush off towards the waiting car outside the gate. However, you were stopped when the pair tightened their grip on your linked arms.

“Any chance your lady friend could give us a lift to your street? We’ll walk from there.” The Russian batted her eyelashes.

“I don’t know guys, we can’t bring too much attention to ourselves…”

“We’ll be careful! Pleeeeeease!” Kate shook your arm, giving you her best puppy dog eyes.

“Fine, I’ll ask.” You gave in, shaking yourself out of their hold and jogging to the car.

Opening the passenger door, you couldn’t help the grin that instantly arose when you leaned down to see the woman.

“Hey sweet girl.” Her raspy use of the pet name sent shivers down your spine, reminding you of the many times she had used the term of endearment when praising you for the way you moved back your hips to me the rapid thrusts of hers.

“Hiii…” You giggled girlishly, instantly turned shy under her intense stare. “So my friends are wondering if you could drop them off on our street.” You scratched the back of your neck nervously, worried she wouldn’t be fond of the idea.

“Yelena and Kate?” She wondered, biting her lip in thought when you nodded to confirm. “Okay, but they’ve got to keep it down when they get out of the car. We don’t need any nosy neighbours getting in our business.”

“Okay! Thank you.” You clapped your hands happily, and Wanda practically melted at the sight of you being so excited over something so simple. She would do anything for you if it meant she could make you that happy.

You leaned down to lay a kiss on her warm cheek before jogging back to your friends who were playfully trying to tackle each other in the car park.

“Okay dorks, she said you can come but you have to be quiet when we get in the neighbourhood.”

Saluting you, Kate joined your side as you began to make your way back to the car. Yelena however, was stuck glaring at a short-haired blonde waving excitedly in your direction.

“Y/n! Wait up!” Turning towards the call, you noticed Carol Danvers, captain of the softball team and your chemistry partner, making her way towards you.

“God, not this mopho.” Yelena rolled her eyes.

“Quit it, she’s nice,” you reprimanded.

“She’s a stupid jock.” You shushed her reply just as Carol, who obviously heard the comment, stopped in front of you with a glare in the Russian’s direction. Her glare dropped instantly when she looked at you however, instead being replaced with a shy smile.

“Hey captain,” you cheeked, watching as red arose to her cheeks in embarrassment, you’re guessing.

“Hi Y/n, I was wondering if you’re still alright with me coming over today so we can work on the project?” She questioned, reminding you of the chemistry project Miss Harkness had set.

“Oh crap yeah, I totally forgot about that. Sorry.” You both laughed nervously. “But yeah, I’m fine with that.”

“Okay cool, do you just wanna…” she gestured back at her truck, hinting that she would drive you both back to your house to begin the project.

“Oh, actually my, uh, neighbour is driving back my friends and I today. But I’ll text you my address and I’ll meet you there in like an hour?” You almost slipped, having to restrain yourself from referring to Wanda as your girlfriend like you had been around Yelena and Kate for the last week since they found out about your relationship.

“Oh sure!” She nodded sheepishly, clumsily taking a couple steps back towards her truck. “So I’ll see you in an hour?”

“She did just say that blondie,” Yelena drawled.

“But Lena, you’re blonde..” Kate whispered.

Shushing them with your index finger in the air, you nodded kindly at Carol, waving her off with your other hand.

Shouting one last goodbye, you finally approached the car with your friends in tow.

Wanda stayed broodingly quiet when you gave her a peck on the cheek. “Sorry for the wait baby.”

She tapped the wheel with one finger, watching in the rear view mirror as your friends settled themselves in the back of the car.

“Thank you for the ride Miss Maximoff!” Kate politely voiced.

“Mmhm.” She hummed mindlessly, still staring into the rear view mirror.

“Wanda?” You verbalised, looking at her expectantly as she still hadn’t started the car.

“Who was that?” She questioned, still not breaking her gaze from the mirror as she began to drive off. She watched the blonde in the varsity jacket grin as she kept glancing at the car you had disappeared into.

“Who? Carol?” Your eyebrows bunched, completely confused at the woman’s interest in the jock.

“Don’t you mean Captain?” Kate joked, leaning her head in between the front seats and making kissy faces in your direction.

You pushed her back with a hand to her face, shaking your head. “It embarrasses her, it’s funny.” You shrugged.

“No, it turns her on.” Yelena let out a loud laugh.

“What?” Wanda barked. You took hold of the ‘Oh Jesus handle’ as she unintentionally sped up down the street.

“W-what? No-“ You blush, attempting to redeem yourself from the flirting you had inadvertently been taking part in.

“Face it Y/n, the idiot has been trying to get in your pants ever since you grew an ass.” The blonde grinned, leaning back in her seat and watching on as Wanda’s grip on the wheel turned whiter by the second.

You sputtered trying to come up with a reply, before settling with a grumbling “shut up.”

The rest of the drive home was silent other than the quiet music flowing through the radio. As soon as Wanda settled the car into her driveway, the duo in the back seats were clambering out, muttering their goodbyes. As soon as they left, Wanda grabbed hold of your neck and pulled you against her. Teeth clashed as she moved her lips against yours hastily, forcing every bit of resentment she held for the blonde she never met into the kiss.

Taking hold of the hair at the back of your head, she pulled you back so you were staring up at her uncomfortably. You didn’t mind though, as you were too busy imagining all the punishments she would possibly induce if it wasn’t for her boys being home from school.

“Don’t forget who you belong to,” she hissed, cupping your chin and squeezing your cheeks.

“Open your mouth,” she ordered firmly as you resisted her efforts. Giving in to her demand, your mouth dropped open. She smirked deviantly before spitting directly on your tongue. She tapped your chin until you closed your mouth, smearing the spit that missed across your lips with her ring-clad thumb. “Swallow.”

You did so instantly, making her laugh devilishly. “That’s my good girl. You would never want anyone other than your mommy to take care of you, would you?”

Her grip loosened enough for you shake your head dumbly.

“Words,” she spat.

“No mommy,” you muttered.

“Good girl. I want you to come over tomorrow whilst the boys are with their father.” She brushed her thumb over your blushed cheek softly. It was a command, but that didn’t irk you.

“Okay,” you smiled excitedly, “is 2pm okay?”

“Perfect.” She kissed you softly, with a gentleness that was completely opposite to the possessiveness she has previously displayed.

———————————————-

After taking a chilling shower to cool yourself down following your lover’s teasing, you hastily ran around your room picking up clothing and clearing space on your desk ready for your guest. Hearing the ring of the doorbell, you surveyed your room carefully to ensure there was nothing embarrassing around before making your way to the front door.

“Carol, hey!” You greeted, moving aside so the softball player could step inside. You led the nervous blonde to your room, thoroughly warning her of the mess before she could step inside. Your pestering over the mess was enough to distract you from the attentive gaping from the woman across the road.

Soon the two of you were sat on your bed cross-legged facing each other, open books between you and nothing written down.

“I really think using marbles in class is a bad idea, what if we drop them all?” You laugh, imagining your grumpy teacher finally slipping in those heels.

“But think about how much better it’ll be to display the types of bonding compared to a PowerPoint, which you know everyone is going to do,” she tilted her head at you, leaning forward and smiling teasingly.

“I guess you’re right,” you huff. Despite the boring context, you found yourself enjoying Carol’s company. You were happy to expand your friendship group beyond dumb and dumber. Carol is outgoing, kind, funny, leaning in startlingly close to your face, wait what?

Chapped lips meet yours gently, unmoving. Carol was cautious with the kiss, pulling back when she didn’t feel you melt in to it like she hoped you would.

“S-sorry,” she stuttered, seemingly shocked by her own actions. “I just- I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time. I really like you Y/n.”

You couldn’t help but flush at the revelation.

“Oh, Carol. I’m sorry but I’m actually seeing someone,” you frowned apologetically.

“Oh. Who? If you don’t mind me asking?” Carol felt a surge of jealousy, clenching her fists in an attempt to keep control of her emotions. You were Y/n, and so she remained as polite as possible whilst avoiding eye contact.

You bit your lip, wondering if you should tell the truth or not. You decided against it, not wanting to risk your relationship. “You don’t know her, she doesn’t go to our school.”

She laughed, getting up from the bed and shaking out her tense muscles. “Well maybe I’ll see her at varsity then if we’re playing against her school. Maybe then I can fight for your hand.” She winked teasingly, though you sensed a little truth in her words.

The atmosphere was quite awkward after that interaction, and so you gave her her section of the work and promised to buy the marbles for your presentation.

After she had left with an awkward one-armed hug to say goodbye, you couldn’t help the guilt that began to reside. You hadn’t kissed Carol back, and you know you don’t have feelings for her. But you didn’t push her away. You narrowed it down to the shock and confusion that led to you being so slow to react, but you still felt telling Wanda about what happened was the right thing to do.

———————————————————

It was time to go see Wanda, and it was an understatement to say you were nervous. Usually you would be ecstatic to go see your lover, but an angry Wanda was not usually something to look forward to, and a part of you couldn’t help the terrifying thoughts of her leaving you.

“Hello? Wanda?” You called out after helping yourself into the house.

“Up here babygirl!” You heard her raspy voice ring from up the stairs. She sounded like she was in a good mood, you couldn’t decide if that was a good or bad thing.

Making your way up the stairs towards the master bedroom, you gave yourself a mental pep talk to prepare yourself for her wrath. With one last deep breathe, you pushed open the bedroom door to see the beauty rifling through her closet.

Closing the doors, she made her way towards you and reached for your hips, tugging your body against hers instantly.

“I was just sorting through the closet to make room for some of your stuff for when you stay over more during the summer,” she grinned. The boys were going to a summer camp for the summer holidays, and so you planned a number of sleepovers. Her brunette hair tickled your cheeks as she leaned down to capture your lips in her own, however despite her cuteness you couldn’t help but let the feeling of guilt grow. Turning your head at the last second, her puckered lips pressed against your cheek chastely.

Pulling back, eyebrows furrowed, her concerned gaze shot at your heart.

“What’s wrong detka?” Her lips pout.

Pulling away from her, you took a seat on the edge of the bed. Reading the serious atmosphere, Wanda took a seat next to you.

“Okay so,” you paused. “Carol came over last night to walk on a chemistry project with me, because we’re partners.”

Wanda’s jaw clenched and her fists turned white. Though she nodded, as if she already knew.

Despite her obvious detest of the blonde, you carried on. “And, I don’t know what happened but apparently the girls were right about that crush she may or may not have on me…”

“What happened?” Her voice gritted through her teeth. The woman was ready to get in her car and find the dumb jock herself.

“She kissed me.”

Wanda stood up, hands gripping her hair as she seethed.

“It meant nothing, I didn’t even kiss back!” You retaliated, shaking your leg nervously.

You were expecting yelling and swearing. However, Wanda’s rigid back relaxed as she let out a long sigh. The strong hands entwined with her hair moved down her face until they dropped to her sides. Turning around after a minute, she dropped to her knees and braced her hands on your legs.

“Shh, relax baby. I’m not mad at you.” She brushed her thumb against one of your cheeks, calming your worried panting.

“You’re not?” Your eyes turned watery in relief.

“No, it’s not your fault you’re so damn enticing. And I know you would never disrespect mommy like that, would you?” Her resting hands began to grip your thighs.

“No mommy, never.” You shook your head desperately, eager to please.

“That’s my good girl.” A smile rose on your face at the praise. Who knew you would be let off this easily?

“But..” Oh. “I think you still need to be reminded of who you belong to.”

A gasp escaped you when she took hold of your sides and pulled you up from the bed. Fast as lightning she had your clothes off of you and was pressing your chest against the cold window, causing your nipples to perk up painfully. You stayed in that position like a good girl as she moved around behind you, following her rules. However, as you looked at your parents car parked at the quiet house across the street, you grew nervous.

“Wa- mommy, what if someone sees?” You caught yourself before making the mistake of using her name, one that would surely result in a punishment.

She leans over you, you gasp when you feel her naked chest pressed against your back and something solid prodding between your legs.

She chuckles. “What? Are you worried about everyone seeing what a whore you are for your mommy?”

You merely whimper in response, mind turning dumb as you lean your hips back to gain some friction against her strap.

“Look at you, falling apart for my cock.” Wanda took hold of your hair, arching your head back so she can whisper seductively in your ear.

At this moment, you no longer cared about who could possibly walk past and see you. All you wanted was Wanda. “Please.”

She moved a hand down to grip her strap, running the head through your already soaked folds. “Did you beg like this for that bitch you saw yesterday too, slut?” She thrusted against you slightly, causing the head to prod at your hole.

“N-no mommy! I promise!” Your eyes filled with tears as you felt your hole gradually be filled by the thick shaft.

“You’re mine,” she grunted as she filled you with a quick buck of her hips. You screamed at the intrusion, but her pace did not falter. She thrusted assertively, ploughing into you with intent on driving the idea of her ownership into you.

“Fuck!” She grunted, laying a hard slap on your ass as she continued to drive her hips against you. “You like this slut?” She panted from behind you.

“Yes mommy,” you squealed when she pulled out of you and flipped you around, grabbing under your thighs and pulling you up onto her muscular waist. The faux cock pushed into you again. She bucked short and fast thrusts into you, the sound of skin slapping filled the room alongside your loud moans.

One hand cupped your ass whilst the other reached up to grip your chin, forcing you to look into her eyes. “Look at me,” she demanded.

Your glazed eyes met her fiery ones, your mouth dropped open whilst she bit her bottom lip to keep her grunts in.

The coil in your stomach began to unravel as her thrusting did not relent. Her hips began to stutter as you came, your walls sucking the cock inside you further. “I’m cumming, I’m cumming!” You whimpered.

Wanda moaned as she too began to reach her peak. Pressing herself against you, she dropped her head on your shoulder as she ground against you, driving you further into the window. Glancing up from your glistening skin as she came, she made eye contact with the same blonde she had seen earlier standing on your porch. The older woman grinned as the blonde dropped the flowers she was holding onto the ground, walking away in a strop. Her thrusts slowed as she laid a delicate kiss on your shoulder before pulling out the piece and lowering your shaky legs to the ground.

Your knees immediately buckled, but her strong arms supported you. Carrying you over to the bed, she lowered you gently with a forgiving kiss on your forehead.

“I love you,” she whispered.

—— the next day ——

You were sat at home on a Sunday night, watching tv alone and missing your lover. Wanda’s kids had just got back that evening, and so you couldn’t stay over without raising suspicion. Plus, your parents would never let you sleep over at “Yelena’s” on a school night.

“Y/n, your mother and I are going to visit a friend that has been having some problems, we probably won’t be back until you’re asleep.” Your dad rounded the sofa to speak to you, shrugging on his jacket.

“Oh, okay.” You feigned a frown, instead excited to use the excuse to see Wanda. It’s not often she gets to visit your room.

“Bye sweetheart,” your mother waved as she left the house. For some reason, you felt her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. The thought was pushed to the back of your mind however when your head flooded with images of Wanda sinfully lying in your bed.

Watching your dad’s car leave the drive, you were quick to shoot Wanda a text.

Parents have gone out for a few hours, are the boys asleep? - Y/n

I’ll be right over. - Wanda

She didn’t take much convincing of course. Before you knew it, the woman was pushing you down onto the family couch, suffocating you with her lustful kisses. Soft moans left the both of you as your hands travelled along the curves of the other. You had only touched her yesterday, and yet you just couldn’t get enough.

Your hands were just slipping under the hem of her shirt when you were forced to break away at the sound of the front door slamming against the wall.

“Mum, Dad,” your eyes widened as your parents walked into the room, disappointment clear on their face.

Wanda jumped up from the couch, straightening out her clothes as she cleared her throat. “Darren, Mindy, it’s not-“

“Shut it cougar!” Your mother interrupted.

“Oh god,” you whined embarrassed, dropping your head into your hands.

“Y/n, how could you let yourself be manipulated by this woman? What you have been doing is completely unacceptable,” she continued.

“We haven’t been doing anything!” You wailed, tears beginning to drop over your flushed cheeks.

“Oh please, don’t lie to us. Your friend told us about what she saw.” Your father pointed at you, his finger shaking in fury as his face scrunched up in disgust towards the end of his claim.

The comment confused you, there was no way Yelena or Kate would say anything about your relationship with your neighbour.

“Friend?” Before either of your parents could settle your curiosity, the blonde jock who had recently kissed you walked into the house nervously.

“Carol? What?” You looked at her disturbed, how did she know?

“I’m sorry Y/n,” she wrung her fingers together nervously. “But I had to show you that what this woman is doing to you is wrong,” she gestured towards the woman, who was growing angrier by the minute.

“You little-“ Before Wanda could continue with her insult, you turned to her, tears further clouding your vision as you began to realise just what had happened.

“She saw us?” You questioned, confirming your parents suspicions. “You let her see us? How could you do that.” How could she put your relationship in jeopardy like that?

She turned her full attention to you, attempting to step in your direction but was faltered when your father drew closer to her. “Baby, I’m sorry I just needed her to see that you are mine-“

Your mother scoffed, “don’t you dare call her that. You’re disgusting, she is a child!”

“Mum! I’m not a child, I’m 18,” you declared firmly, crossing your arms.

“You’re not even finished with school yet Y/n, this woman is sick, and is using you for her disgusting sexual gratification.”

“It’s not like that,” Wanda butted in, ignoring the menacing look your father is yet to drop. “I love her.”

Your heart soared, but you couldn’t enjoy the moment with your parents staring you down.

“I want you to leave my house, and never return,” your father blocked her view of you as he took another threatening step towards her. “If I ever see you around my daughter again, I will be telling everyone in town about what you have done. You will be a disgrace, your sons will never look at you the same again.”

You could see Wanda’s attempt at bravery falter, you immediately began to sob. This great love was over. Taking a step back, she walked out of the house quietly, with one last longing look in your direction, beautiful green eyes filled with tears.

———————————————

Sorry it took so long! I haven’t had a moment to myself. Hope you enjoyed.

Love, Meg xx

#wanda maximoff fanfiction #marvel women #marvel #marvel smut #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff smut #wanda maximoff x female reader #mommy wanda #wanda maximoff fanfic #carol danvers x reader #carol danvers

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absurdist-shitpost · 2 years ago

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Seen a lot of arguments about whether or not it was in character for c!Tommy to attempt to reach out to c!Dream in the finale, but not a lot about how OOC it felt for Dream to respond the way he did?

Like. I’m upset about how Tommy’s character was handled for a variety of reasons but judging the stream purely by ‘do the characters act in ways that feel realistic based on how they’ve previously been characterized’ I actually think c!Dream was done far dirtier.

C!Dream is genuinely one of my favorite characters. He makes for a terrifying villain while also feeling deeply human, (and I really don’t think we needed a sympathetic flashback to further humanize him, but that’s a different topic) he’s cruel and controlling and deeply self-centered, but at the same time he craves connection to others while refusing to admit to feeling any sort of attachment out of fear.

C!Dream has always struck me as a character Deeply Afraid of vulnerability. Deeply afraid of Losing Control. I’ve seen posts floating around about how Dream’s planning relies much more heavily on improvisation and luck then he admits, and this is for a reason! Dream doesn’t want to say that he messed up, or that something went wrong, instead he’d much rather say that he was sabotaged (usually by c!tommy) or that This Was Totally the Plan All Along Guys.

It makes perfect sense for Dream to act like this! He was always a competitive and prideful person, even before Shit Got Bad, so when he (and the server more broadly) started taking things farther and farther, committing acts that he likely would have considered Too Far in the past, he responded by by digging his heals in. Because This Was Totally the Plan All Along Guys. If nothing else, c!Dream is a goddamn master of Committing To The Bit.

It’s what gives his character it’s tragedy. Because he would truly be happier just hanging out with his friends. But in the end, /he’s/ the one who cuts them off, not because of anything Tommy or anyone else did, but because he was scared that keeping them around would make him vulnerable. He becomes so blinded by his stubborn attachment (heh) to his own plans and power and this idea of godhood that not only does he ruin the lives of those around him, he ruins his /own/ life too.

And you’re telling me. That Dream, the same Dream that has tortured and abused multiple people, who has gotten /himself/ tortured and jailed, who cut off his friendships, ruined his own reputation on purpose and literally /died/ multiple times all in service of a plan that /he could’ve abandoned himself at multiple points/, That Dream, suddenly decides he gonna call it all off after a 15 minute conversation? Really?

And to be clear, I’m not saying that it feels unrealistic for Dream to regret his actions. In fact, I think it’s likely a part of him has regretted them since he started doing them. But Dream’s reaction to things going wrong has always been to either deflect or dig his heels in. To convince himself that it’s worth it. And above all, to never show Anyone that regret, because that would mean being vulnerable.

C!Tommy ‘understanding his motives’ wouldn’t make c!Dream happy or willing to listen to him, in fact it feels more in line with his character for him to be deeply angered and disturbed by this. There’s no way I can believe that c!Dream would want anyone, much less c!tommy, seeing what he likely considers to be deeply personal memories. C!Dream may want to be understood deep down, but that desire is overwhelmed by his crushing fear of being known. It’s why he cut off c!george and c!Sapnap in the first place, and why he’s dodgy in acknowledging c!Punz as more than just an ally. To c!dream, being understood means being hurt. It means giving someone else control over you.

And maybe c!Dream could overcome this, could realize he was only hurting himself and everyone around him, could realize that /this wasn’t really what he wanted/ but not in 15 goddamn minutes. Not when, from his perspective, his plan had finally come to fruition and he was in a position to obtain Goddamn Immortality. The Only Reason c!Dream was written to have such a quick turn around was because cc!Dream wanted to soften his character at the last second, despite his entire arc before this being built on him essentially sunk-cost-fallacying himself into self destructing and dragging everyone down with him.

Justice for c!Dream. In my heart of hearts you died drunk on your own hubris attempting to become an immortal death god.

#dsmp #dsmp meta #c!dream #dsmp finale #dsmp neg #I see c!Dream apologists celebrating this ending and I. cannot understand why #not even from my own bias perception of just not wanting a c!Dream redemption arc at all #but just like. if I had been hoping for a c!Dream redemption arc or for him to be portrayed sympathetically #likely for years #and this was what I got?#id be insulted #there’s no development #it doesn’t feel earned or in character #and three seconds later it’s all undone by amnesia anyway #it’s not even c!dreams choice #it only happens bc of what c!tommy sees in limbo #like #this is really what you guys wanted?#long post

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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years ago

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What Have I Done? - Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: Angst, Physical injuries, cursing

Summary: An argument gone out of hand. Y/N just wanted Katsuki to be home more. They’re married and yet she barely sees him throughout the week. When she finally speaks on her hurt feelings, she gets a reaction she definitely wasn’t expecting.

Chapter 1 -> Chapter 2

A/N:.....I cried while writing this.

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

‘He’s gone already. Again. Like always.’

Y/N had awoken to another empty bed. Her husband’s side of the mattress remained cold and empty. This wasn’t anything new. It’s been like this for the past few months. She would wake up alone, eat breakfast alone, spend her day alone, eat dinner alone, and go back to sleep at the end of the day...alone.

It’s not that Katsuki is intentionally ignoring Y/N. He loves her with his everything, he truly does! But villains never rest and neither does he. He’s so preoccupied with hero work that when he does get a day off, his friends drag him away to a bar or game night. Y/N always ran through his head but she had always been so understanding. And besides, she knows how busy the life of a pro is. She used to be one so she gets it. Right?

Wrong. She doesn’t get it. Because even when she was a pro, her and Katsuki always found time for each other. And ever since said man made her quit, claiming he could take care of both of them easily and he would feel better knowing his beloved is safe at home, they’ve seen each other less and less. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. Y/N was willing to quit her dream because she found a new dream in Katsuki. She always imagined that being his little housewife would give them more time together but the opposite of that came true. Now she sits in the big empty house with no company for hours on end.

Her sadness builds up every day. She misses her husband. She tries to be an understanding wife but at this point, it’s like he’s not even trying to make an effort to see her. It’s like he’s settled to just coming home to her sleeping form and waking up to her in the exact same state, leaving before he can witness her do anything else. He should understand her though, no? I mean, she had brought it up to him in a very casual way and so he never took it seriously, but she’s mentioned it before. He should have a pretty vivid image of how shes been feeling. Right?

After 6 months of loneliness and being ‘Katsuki-deprived,’ Y/N made her move to speak to her husband about her feelings. She already imagined the outcome. An argument due to Katsuki’s brash behavior and her ‘never back down’ attitude, sad times bringing in the silent treatment for the two of you up until the both of you give in and forgive each other due to the love you have. Finally ending in a compromise. Y/N released a heavy breath as she looked at the time.

1:36 a.m. Just a few more minutes until Katsuki’s home.

—

He was pissed. 3 large scale bank robberies, 10 villain-wannabe fights, an argument with his publicist about his ‘out of line attitude,’ and Deku replacing him on a random ass billboard. The last detail wouldn’t have mattered if it was anybody else but the fact that it was Deku had him riled up. He just wanted to go home to a quiet house with his beautiful wife and admire her gorgeous, slumbering state. However that was not what he was greeted with.

Katsuki grumbled as he unlocked the front door and walked in. He noticed the lights were still on and saw Y/N still awake, seated on the couch. On any other day, he’d be elated to see his wife was still up. They’d talk and cuddle and go to sleep together. If he was lucky, they’d both make love until the sun rose. But tonight, that wouldn’t be happening. He wanted a quiet house with his sleeping wife. Not..whatever was about to happen. He sighed as he dropped his bag at the front door and sloppily placed his keys in the glass bowl near the door.

“What’re you doing up dumbass?” He asked as he walked to the kitchen, not even bothering to take off his shoes. He needed a drink.

“I was waiting for you, Katsuki. I just wanted to talk to you about something,” you said in a soft voice, hoping it would suppress his for sure incoming anger. Katsuki closed the fridge with a kick to the heavy door and chugged down a quarter of his drink.

“I’m not in the mood. Had a shitty day and I wanna sleep. Just go to bed.” He said sternly while trying to finish his beer as fast as he could.

“Don’t you think I would’ve done that hours ago? I wouldn’t have stayed up and waited for you if this wasn’t important. Please Katsuki, I really wanna talk.” Bakugou was beginning to grow annoyed. Why wouldn’t you just drop it already? He squeezed his bottle hard enough for it too crack before he spoke with a louder voice.

“Y/N! You’re not listening! I’m tired. I had a horrible day and I just want to sleep. I don’t want to talk, I don’t want to stay up anymore, and I don’t want to listen to whatever bullshit you’re about to complain and bitch about like you always do!” He screamed. His words made your jaw drop.

“Not listening?! That’s all I do! All I do is listen to your every command so that you come home happy-“

“Well it looks like you failed today!” He said, cutting you off.

“Quit interrupting! And what was it that you said?! All I do is bitch and complain?! I’m trying to talk to you about something serious here Katsuki!” You pleaded, still hoping he would give in and listen. And he did...just not in the way you’d expect.

“Fine then! If this’ll get you to quit being an annoying ass waste of time, then speak! Talk! What the hell do you want?!” He asked, screaming at you, furious at all the dramatics you’ve brought up in one night.

His words kind of stung. ‘Annoying ass? Waste of time? Is this what he thinks I am?’ You grew silent at his insults and Katsuki seethed even more.

“Oh what? I scream at you and you bitch up? Toughen up Y/N, jeez. Quit acting like a baby! Tell me what you wanted to say!” He yelled.

“.......I just....I just wanted you to spend some time with me. .....Be home more.” You said in a quiet and broken voice. You looked down to the now very interesting floor as you played with your hands.

“Seriously? This shit again? I’m a pro-hero, Y/N! I’m busy! I’m not gonna drop saving lives just because your brat ass wants someone to notice you! Since when were you such an attention whore?” He asked while rolling his neck to relieve his strained muscles. Your eyes widen at the ground due to his words and your head snapped back up to face him.

“A-attention whore? I-...I just want my husband to stop working so much. I don’t know..maybe have a day off or two!” She said with a crinkled nose as you screamed.

“I do have days off, Moron. It’s why I’m not overworked, ever thought about that?!” He screamed back.

“And you spend those days off away from me! I’m not trying to act like the world revolves around me but I would hope my own husband would spend a day with me instead of his friends that he ALWAYS sees because you ALL WORK TOGETHER!” You argued. You made a valid point and even Katsuki knew that, but he was too stubborn to admit defeat. He was still tired but he had enough energy to put you back in your place. His eyes popped as a vein grew on his neck.

“Well- WELL YOU’RE ONCE AGAIN JUST BITCHING AND COMPLAINING LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO! I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU’RE SO UPSET!” He screamed.

“Don’t understand?! You know what? I know you don’t because you never listen to-“

“SHUT THE FUCK UP, I WASNT DONE TALKING! ALL YOU DO IS SIT AROUND THE HOUSE, LAZING AROUND, DOING NOTHING BUT TRY TO ARGUE WITH-“

“LAZING AROUND?!” You shouted in disbelief. “WHO MAKES YOUR MEAL PREP THE NIGHT BEFORE SO YOU CAN ENJOY IT AT WORK AND IN THE MORNING? WHO CLEANS THE ENTIRE HOUSE EVERYDAY WHILE YOU’RE GONE? WHO MAKES SURE YOU HAVE A FULL FRIDGE, CLEAN HOUSE, GOOD FOOD, AND A HAPPY LIFE? ME KATSUKI! ME!”

“Happy life? DO I LOOK HAPPY TO YOU BITCH?! NEWSFLASH, IM NOT! SO CONGRATS Y/N! YOU FAILED ONCE AGAIN! AND WHO GIVES A FUCK IF YOU PLAY MAID WHILE IM AWAY?! IM BUSY SAVING THE FUCKING WORLD! THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS BE A GOOD WIFE SINCE YOU CANT EVEN BE A FUCKING PRO ANYMORE!” He insulted again.

“because of FUCKING YOU!” You argued once more.

“I DID IT FOR YOU!” He said while throwing his bottle to the wall, causing it to shatter. “I DO EVERYTHING FOR YOUR UNGRATEFUL BITCH ASS! I PAY THE BILLS! I BRING HOME THE CASH! I GIVE YOU THE MONEY TO BUY ALL THE FUCKING FOOD, CLOTHES, AND ANY OTHER STUPID SHIT YOU WANT! AND ON TOP OF THAT, I STUFF YOUR STUPID CUNT TO PLEASURE YOUR UNGRATEFUL ASS. AT THIS POINT, YOU’RE JUST A WALKING HOLE FOR ME TO USE!”

His words hurt. They broke your heart. Did he really feel this way? If so, why was he even with you anymore. You notice a smirk grow on his face at your bewildered state. He looked as if he just won something. However, the smirk dropped into a scowl once he saw your eyes begin to pool with tears.

“Oh great! Cry! Go ahead! Just shed your fucking tears like you always do! I’m going to bed! Come join me when you’re done being an annoying bitch.” He said and stuffed his hands in his pockets as he began to walk away. You didn’t want the conversation to go this way and there was no conclusion. You needed this to be resolved now. You just wanted your husband back. You reached out to stop him from walking but the unforeseen happened.

“Katsuki..don’t walk away from thi-“

“DONT FUCKING TOUCH ME!” He said and smacked your arms away with a burning palm. Without realizing, Katsuki began to spark his quirk and so when he went in to push you away, he burned your forearm.

A loud blast and smoke filled the room and your screams of pain invaded his ears. The sound made a shocked face grow on him as he quickly turned to see the damaged he had caused. His heart sank as he saw you crying while holding your burnt arm with your other hand. You were slightly hunched over in pain as you took notice of the damage that had been caused. That he caused.

“Y/N!” Bakugou softly shouted as he ran to you. He wanted to help but before he could even lay a finger on you, you flinched. The action caused him to hesitate and hold himself back. He ran to the kitchen sink to get a cold rag and he brought it back to you. “Baby! I am so sor-“

You pushed him away and off of you as you quickly walked to your bedroom with a shadow casted over your eyes. Tears still flowed down your cheeks as sniffles could be heard from your cherry red nose. Katsuki couldn’t believe what he just did and ran to follow you.

“Y/N! Please listen! I didn’t mean it! I don’t know how that happened Teddy Bear but I swear I didn’t mean it! I swear I didn’t mean any of the bullshit I said! I’m sor-“

*SLAM* *click!*

Katsuki realized he followed you out the kitchen, through the living room, up the stairs, and to the entrance of the master bedroom you both shared before you slammed the door and locked it right in his face.

“Baby! Please open the door!” He said while knocking in a very rushed manner. He wanted nothing more than to help you and treat the damage he caused to his beloved wife. He had royally fucked up. He began turning and jiggling the locked knob in an attempt to get it open but failed. “Please Y/N! I have to take care of you and that burn. I’m so sorry but please let me in!”

On the other side of the door, you pressed your back against it as you held in your sobs and slid to the bottom. You pulled both lips in to conceal your voice while you held your wrist to examine the burn on your arm. It was so bad. Your skin turned an angry shade of red as it blistered and bled. You were dripping blood all over your carpeted floor and so you ran to the master bathroom in the bed room.

You turned on the sink and placed your forearm under the cold, running water. The water soothed it a bit but it wasn’t enough to cover the pain. You turned off the sink and grabbed a hand rag as you patted down on your wound. You took out the first aid kit and cared for yourself. You had to take the alcohol to clean it and sucked in a breath before you poured the solution over the burn. You screamed as it seemed to have hurt 10x more. After dabbing cotton over it, you wrapped it in bandages and took a breath of relief.

‘What just happened?’ You thought to yourself.

The entire time, Katsuki was still begging for you to open up. He heard your scream and grew frantic. He banged on the door and cried for you, still hoping, praying, that you would let him in. When nothing happened, he resorted back to calling out for you but to no avail.

About an hour went by and it was almost 4 in the morning. You sat on the bed with your arms holding your knees to your chest. You stared at the wrap as the memories of what went down tonight flashed through your brain.

‘Waste of time...brat ass...attention whore...ungrateful...annoying bitch.’

His words struck you right in your heart. Cruel thoughts began to fill your head.

‘He doesn’t love me. He hates me. I’m worthless.’ Your thoughts would’ve continued until a quiet knock snapped you out of you mind.

“....Y/N?...Baby?” It was Katsuki of course, but a softer version of him. A broken one. “..I don’t know if you’re listening or if you’re awake..but I need you to know that I’m so so sorry.” It was easy to hear his muffled and staggered voice that exposed his tears and sobs. “If I could turn back time right now, I would do tonight all over again, I swear. I would’ve came home and listened to you. And we could’ve talked things out. We would’ve came out of this problem being a stronger couple than we were before...because that’s what we always do. We always make it out of the dark together..because we’re a team..and I need you. .....Please...please don’t leave me Y/N. I love you so much. ‘M so sorry that I hurt you..that I burned you..that I’m such a terrible husband. But I promise you I’ll fix everything in the morning...................Teddy Bear?”

He didn’t know it, but you were listening. You heard every word but refrained from speaking. You knew that the second you did, you’d break down and go crawling back to him....but you didn’t want to do that. You wanted to leave. He physically burned you and you wanted to leave. You were going to sleep for a few hours, and when you would awaken, you would pack a bag and leave. And so, you began your plan and tried to get some sleep as tear streaks marked your face. It would all be over soon.

You woke up to the morning sun.

6:50 a.m.

You rose out of bed and rubbed at your puffy eyes. You quietly got ready in the bathroom and applied the slightest bit of makeup to look more presentable. You took out a pair of shoes and tossed them to the center of the room. You were in your closet and pulled out a bag. You stuffed it full of a few clothes for you to wear, you couldn’t stay here. Not after what he did. You fought through the pain as you pulled on your jacket and placed your shoes on. You wiped your tears as you picked up your purse and got ready to leave. You were going to stay in a hotel. Didnt matter where or how expensive. You just needed to get away.

Finally, you walked to the exit of the bedroom. You took a breath before you slowly turned the knob and was greeted with the sight of a sleeping Bakugou. He had slept in the hallway in front of the bedroom, still wearing the same clothes from the night before. His knees were scrunched up with his arms resting there to be used as a pillow. He layed his head atop of his arms and as you looked down into his hands, you saw the rag. The exact rag from the argument. The rag that he attempted to use to help you. Little did you know, Bakugou hadn’t planned on getting rid of it until you let him use it to help you. He wanted nothing more than to fix his mistake and cater to you and your wound.

You shook your head as you felt tears began to fill your eyes but you refused to let them fall. You took a step and sadly awoken the exact man you were trying to avoid. Bakugou had quickly woken up when he heard the slightest noise and was blessed with the beauty that is you. He looked up at you with wide eyes and a small smile.

“Y/N...” was what he whispered before he quickly got up to run to you.

“Y/N!” He ecstatically said with a hint of relief. He was about to wrap him arms around you but you kept a hand at his chest to keep him at bay. “Baby?...”

Bakugou looked at you with hurt and confused eyes when you didn’t welcome his embrace. Even when you were mad at him, you still allowed him to hold you so what gives? He looked at you and your attire. He noticed your jacket and shoes and saw you holding a bag. “W-what are you doing?”

You walked away from him but he snatched your wrist to make you turn to face him. “Y/N! What’s going on?!” He frantically asked with crazed eyes. You snatched your wrist back and ran down the stairs and he copied your actions. He followed you into the living room until he grabbed your wrist once more. You tried to pull away again but found it harder because this time, he gripped it tight.

“W-where are you going baby?”

“Dont call me that.”

“What? Why? Baby, please tell me what’s going on.” He begged as he squeezed your wrist.

“What’s going on? Are you serious? What does it look like? I’m leaving!” Bakugou’s eyes went wide once more and shook his head.

“N-no! No, why!?”

“Why?! Look at my arm!” You screamed.

“I know! I know and I’m so sorry! But..but you don’t have to go! I can fix you up, I’ll take you to recovery girl, I will bring you to the best hospitals around the world to fix that for you! Just please don’t go!” He bargained and offered everything but you weren’t budging.

“It’s not just the burn Bakugou.” You deadpanned with a nonchalant face. His heart felt heavy after hearing your voice refer to him with his family name.

“..I-it’s Katsuki! Your Katsuki! It’s Suki, baby please!” Bakugou stepped closer as he cried once more but you backed away again. His hold on your wrist still strong as his fingers played with the ring on your hand, trying to calm himself down and remind himself that you are still his wife.

You shook your head at his pleading. “Bakugou. You burned me. But not only that, you’ve neglected me for months.”

“I know that! And I’m sorry! I will spend just as much time off of work to make it up to you, I swear I will, I promise!” He once again bargained.

“It’s too late.”

“No it’s not, please, it can’t be!”

“It is Bakugou-“

“KATSUKI! ....please...please don’t call me that. I’m your Katsuki,” he said with a whimpering voice. At this point you felt the tears come through, but you still didn’t allow them to fall.

“Katsuki...I can’t stay here. Too much damage has been done.” You said with a soft voice. Bakugou continued to shake his head ‘no,’ but you already made up your mind. You used your wind quirk in your hand and blew his grip off your wrist. You took the quick opportunity to walk to the door but Bakugou grabbed your bag off your shoulder in a childish panic and attempt to get you to stay.

“Hey!-“

“Please Y-Y/N! Please don’t leave me! I- I know I’ve been a terrible husband! I’m sorry! B-But I promise I’ll do better. I’ll stay at home more, I’ll spend more time with you, Please!”

“Katsu-“

“I’ll buy you whatever you want! I’ll get you all the expensive brands, I’ll find you all the best jewelry, I’ll give you all the money in the world! I’ll give you the whole world! Please stay! I love you so much Y/N!”

“Katsuki, give me back my bag,” you tried to reach for it but Bakugou kept it away from you and pulled you in with one arm and held you in a tight embrace as he cried on your shoulder.

“Please...you can’t do this to me. I need you. I love you! I’ll do better! I’ll be a better husband, I swear..just please don’t go.” He softly spoke with a broken voice and soft hiccups. It was wrong for you to do this, but you sighed and pretended to forgive him as you wrapped your arms around his torso. You hugged him tight and he fell for it as he openly sobbed now. His other arm that held your bag came to wrap around your waist but before it could, you snatched the bag out of his hold and pushed him away. You ran to the door and held a tight grip on the knob as you picked up your car keys. You saw Katsuki attempt to run back to you but you created a strong barrier of wind to protect you. “IM SORRY Y/N! PLEASE DONT!”

You took off your ring and tossed it to him through the barrier. He was quick to catch it and hold it right in fear of losing it. He had to find a way to get it back on your finger. “No..baby...Teddy Bear please!”

“....I’ll send you the divorce papers....Goodbye Katsuki.”

With that, you walked out of the door, still keeping the barrier alive. Once you started the car, you dispersed of the wind and Bakugou opened the door and ran to your car.

“Y/N wait! Please!” He cried out but he was too late. You pulled out of the driveway and drove off quickly down the street. He watched your car go as he began hyperventilating and tugging at his ash blonde locks. He ran back inside the house with your ring in hand as he looked for his phone. He found it on the kitchen island and quickly dialed your number. Of course, it went straight to voicemail but that didn’t stop him from calling about 50x more.

“This-...this has to be some stupid dream. A fucking nightmare...” he said as he tried to hide in denial. “Yeah...a nightmare. This is what it is...I’ll..I’ll wake up soon and she’ll be by my side in the morning...sleeping peacefully...and I’ll take the whole week off and spend it with her. She won’t be mad, we’ll be happy like we always are. S-She won’t leave me.”

Bakugou had an insane smile on his face with eyes of distraught on him. He clumsily made his way back to his bedroom where he flopped onto the large mattress and tried to get some sleep. He would sleep the whole day away if it meant you’d still be by his side when he woke up. The ring you abandoned was held tight in the palm of his hand as he held it close to his chest. His sobs overcame him but did aid in his journey to slumber. Eventually, he knocked out and a smile of bliss adorned his face as he assumed you would still be there in the morning.....oh how wrong he was.

The very next day, he woke up at 5:30 like he always did and quickly looked to your side of the bed. It was cold and empty. He was lonely. The exact same feeling you got everytime you woke up without seeing him for the past 6 months.

6 months. You’ve been married for 4 years and together for 8. Out of those 8 years, Bakugou spent 6 months neglecting you..and now...he lost you.

He stared at the empty space and bawled his eyes out like a baby as he screamed. He got out of bed and walked to the kitchen. Maybe you were cooking breakfast! You weren’t. Kitchen was empty. He ran to the living room! Maybe you were just watching some TV and reading a book, looking all cute and domesticated like you usually did. No, you weren’t there either. Bakugou checked every room in the house and when he couldn’t find you..he snapped.

His heart beated at a rapid pace as he trashed the entire house. Breaking windows, flipping desks, smashing furniture. He used his quirk to create blasts and burn marks into the walls and floors of the house. He did everything to get his frustrations out. The entire time he shouted and cried as rivers of tears flowed down his cheeks.

When he was done, he sat in the middle of the destroyed living room, laying his back against the flipped couch. He sat with his knees scrunched up as he hunched over, staring at the ground. His nose and eyes and basically his entire face grew puffy and red. His hair was a mess and so was he. Silent tears continued to drop, but his throat was too dry and hurt far too much for him to make anymore noise. However, he did fight through the pain to say one final thing:

“What have I done?”

A/N: hi cubsss! So a lot of you may know that my very first post, writing piece, and short story (He’s Lost) was created around angst, a breakup, and the fact that the triggering point was Bakugou physically hurting Y/N. I’ve been thinking about it and I HATE MY WRITING IN THE FIRST POST! It was terrible! Why tf did y’all like it so much?😭 And so, I’ve created a new piece revolving around the same elements, sorta as a way to check my progress. I hope you enjoyed!

ALSO!!! If you guys like this enough, I’m willing to turn it into a small yandere short story if you Cubs are down for that. Let me know and I’ll make it happen! Love you Cubs! See you next time🧸💗

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bubbleteaimagines · 4 years ago

Text

He cheats and gets someone else pregnant

Haikyuu Boys Drabbles

The one where you finally realize your worth and don’t forgive a cheater

SUNA RINTARO

It was inevitable, he supposed. You weren’t a dumb person- you’d figure it out soon enough. You’d pick up on the signs- notice how much he’s been going out lately and staring at his phone. Laughing at things you hadn’t sent him, becoming distant, slowly but surely.

Suna knew you’d find out.

He just wasn’t expecting it to be soon.

He had come home one evening and took a shower like normal. While he washed up, he made the terrible mistake of leaving his phone in the kitchen, thinking that there was no way she’d text him. Their relationship was dwindling, after all. Suna was beginning to let the guilt get to him.

After 3 long months, he finally realized what he had wanted. He wanted you, forever and always. He wanted to marry you and spend the rest of his days traveling and experiencing new things with you.

Unfortunately though, he figured it out too late. A boys mistake, thinking that the grass was greener on the other side. And he’d soon pay the price for that wishful thinking.

While you were cooking dinner, you couldn’t help but notice how often his phone was going off. It kept dinging every few seconds, quickly causing you to become irritated.

Suna’s phone never went off that much, and so you thought surely it must be the boys. They probably added him into a group chat, you figured.

Oh how wrong you were.

The minute you walked over to the device and picked it up, you could truly feel your heart break. Searing pain burst through you like a rocket, a gasp leaving your lips as you scrolled through the messages.

8:53 PM

Unknown: Suna? Do you think we could talk?

Unknown: I know you said that you were going back to Y/N, but I...I’m pregnant. And it’s yours

Undeniably, you were shocked and confused. Pregnant? Who was this that was texting his phone? And why the hell did she think she was pregnant by your boyfriend?

A sickening feeling began to bubble in your stomach. Putting the phone down, you clenched your fists and took deep breaths.

In and out, Y/N. In and out.

Surely there was an explanation for this, right? You’d ask Suna as soon as he got done showering, and he’d laugh and tell you how this was all a misunderstanding. Some prank by Atsumu, wanting to get him back in his own cruel way.

But...

One look at his face, though, and you knew everything.

“Tell me you didn’t,” Your bottom lip trembled as you stared at Suna, his eyes widened as he looked at the phone in your trembling hands. Once again, it pinged, but you didn’t even have the energy to look. The only thing you were focused on was your heavy breathing, and the fact that you were becoming light-headed as Suna stepped forward.

“Y/N, baby, I can explain.”

As soon as those words left this lips, your entire world shattered. Letting out a sob, you dropped the phone and used your hands to cover your mouth in horror.

“So you did.”

Suna became panicked as soon as you started crying, holding onto the kitchen table to keep yourself from falling over. The pain that you felt was indescribable, not to mention the absolute betrayal. You had given everything up for Suna- and he repayed you like this?

“Y/N/N, please,” Suna was begging as he moved closer, trying to embrace your crying figure in his arms but you pushed him away, sudden anger taking over you.

“Don’t touch me!” Suna flinched as your damn near threw him off, backing up so far from him. The look in your eyes nearly killed him as you made eye contract, “I don’t want your filthy hands on me now that I know where they’ve been!”

“Y/N...-”

“Shut the fuck up Suna!”

You could no longer control yourself as rage began taking over your body, slowly but surely replacing the tears. The more you processed it - the more you looked at that bastards face and realized that he had went and knocked someone up while you were at home, cooking his dinner - the more infuriated you became.

“I cannot fucking believe you. Like are you serious right now?! I spend all day, all fucking day waiting for you Suna. I cook your food, I run you baths, I do everything I can to make your life less stressful and then you go and do this shit?”

“Baby just listen me, it’s not like that, okay?Whatever you saw- it’s in the past! Me and her- it meant nothing. I realize that now. It’s me and you baby- just us. That’s all I want,” Suna felt tears trailing down his cheeks as he desperately pleaded his case. Desperately grabbing at you, trying to hold you as if that would make everything okay. As if a simple “I’m sorry,” could fix what he broke.

Instead, you found yourself laughing bitterly and fought the urge to smack him in the face. No, you decided you’d have more dignity than that. You’d pack your stuff, peacefully, and leave this asshole here to rot.

“Whatever.”

That was quickly decided in your mind and within seconds, you were shaking your head, scoffing as you pushed passed him and practically ran to your shared bedroom.

“Wait-! Y/N, what are you doing? No, no, no, no!” Suna panicked even more when he followed you and saw that you were hurriedly packing your stuff in a suitcase. It was messy, and you barely had half of your shit but you decided that it’d do. At least until right now. At least until...well, you didn’t really know anymore.

You and Suna, you guys were supposed to be each other’s forever. You were supposed to be endgame, but as it turned out, Suna ruined that before you could even get a ring.

You scoffed again at the prospect of ever marrying him. Now, you began to think about why you even wanted him in the first place. How did you not notice the signs? The lack of effort for weeks until Suna suddenly warmed up again and began treating you like you were his world.

How did you not catch on? How did it completely slip your mind that you were dating a cheater, until the facts suddenly smacked you right in the face?

“What does it look like I’m doing, Rintaro,” You rolled your eyes, zipping the suitcase and then booking it to the bathroom. You quickly grabbed your body wash, all your hair products and then your toothbrush. You lazily threw them in a another bag and then stood up, glaring at Suna who tried to block you from exiting the door.

“Move,” You stared him down, venom lacing your words. “I don’t fucking have time for this.”

“Baby, please,” You flinched as he reached out to touch you, to stroke your cheek with the same hands that had touched her. They were slightly wet, presumably from wiping his tears away, but all you could think about was that you weren’t the only one he had been coming home to. You weren’t the only one he had been fucking and touching.

The thought made you absolutely sick. You were sure that if you didn’t get out now, then you’d puke all over your- his expensive furniture.

“You have to listen to me,” Suna silently cried, his body shaking as he stood there, begging for the one person he needed in his life to stay. “I told you- she means nothing. I don’t want anything to do with her, I only want you, Y/N.”

“And the baby?” Dammit. You couldn’t help yourself. Once again, your anger began to fade as tears gathered in your eyes.

Suna had a child. He had a fucking child with some stranger he’d known less than six months. She was carrying his blood, something that was supposed to be your moment. You were supposed to give him his first child. You were supposed to be the one he shared that part of life with, not her.

“I- what?”

From the looks of it, you’d almost think that Suna didn’t know. His eyes were wide, his whole body stopping as he stared at you incredulously.

And then it hit you.

He didn’t know.

He didn’t even know that she was carrying his baby. He was completely clueless. Both of you were blindsided.

At this, you couldn’t help it. You did laugh, a bitter sound that sounded almost like you were mocking him.

“Wow Rintaro. How fucking stupid could you get?” You let out a watery chuckle, shaking your head as a tear ran down your face. “If you’re gonna cheat and fuck someone else, then at least be smart enough to wear a condom.”

“But I...that’s impossible,” Suna whispered, mostly to himself. “I don’t...I mean she can’t possibly...how did you...?”

“She was blowing up your phone while you were in the shower. How did you think I found out?” You gave him a fake smile. “For someone that doesn’t like putting in a lot of effort, you sure did put a lot into making sure you fucked this relationship up. And then your own life too.”

You hated to say it, but you silently enjoyed the way Suna was going to suffer. At the very least, it was absolutely what he deserved for cheating in the first place. Now, his life was probably going to be ruined. His career, his dreams, everything he had planned...

It was gonna go down the drain.

And you for one were grateful he wasn’t dragging you down with him.

“I...” Suna was at an absolute loss for his words. His whole body slumped, seemingly going numb as he just stayed in the doorway, looking shocked. It gave you the perfect opportunity to push past him, a small smirk on your face despite the searing pain in your heart.

You knew it was serious when he didn’t even try to stop you when you opened the front door.

“I left your phone on kitchen floor. Maybe you should call her. I’m sure you’d like to know more, seeing as it is yours. For your sake, I hope it’s a bouncing baby boy. That’s what you always wanted, right?”

You spoke one last time, making sure to rub salt in the wound before taking a final glance at the man you loved.

He looked broken, a sheer sobbing mess as he still stood in your bedroom door. A part of you couldn’t help but feel bad. You couldn’t help but want to go over and embrace him, dropping everything and tell him that things were gonna work out.

That was the part of you that still loved him.

But the other part...

The other part of you told you that it’s what he deserved. He cheated, and now he has to live with the consequences. Loosing you, and becoming a father at the age of 20.

That was the part of you that gave you the extra push. That was the part of you that gave you the strength to close the door, forever walking away from the man that broke you and the empty house that held all of your dead dreams.

——————————— ☁️ ——————————

BOKUTO KOUTARO

You didn’t believe it. Or more like, you didn’t want to believe it. You didn’t wanna shatter your fantasy world, one that you had been living in for four years.

You didn’t want it to break, because if it did...

You didn’t know what you were going to do.

For the last four years Bokuto had been your world. Your absolute rock, your sunshine on a cloudy day. He made you laugh, he made you feel welcome and special like nobody else had before.

Surely...your Bokuto wasn’t capable of this. Surely didn’t...he couldn’t have...

You didn’t even wanna think about it. Bile rose up in your throat every time you thought about it...his lips on hers. Caressing her and holding her the way he was supposed to only hold you.

You didn’t wanna think about it, but yet-

You had no choice as you stared at the pregnant woman before you.

“I’m sorry,” She had tears in her eyes as she sat on your couch, sobbing while simultaneously holding her belly. While holding his baby.

She had come to you only a few hours before, taking you by complete surprise. Never in your life did you ever think you’d come face to face with your boyfriend’s baby momma.

But that’s exactly what had happened.

Apparently, she and Bokuto had both had a one stand a few months ago. It was when he had traveled to Tokyo for a game and you stayed behind because you had school.

It was the one weekend you weren’t there to support him. One weekend...and you had lost him forever.

“It’s not...it’s not your fault,” You told her somewhat awkwardly, although you didn’t really mean it. She had slept with your boyfriend, after all. And now she was pregnant, claiming the baby was 100% his.

That wasn’t even the worst part though.

The worst part was that you couldn’t even be mad at her, because she didn’t know. It was a one night thing. She had told you Bokuto had left in tears the next morning, rambling on about how she meant nothing and that he had you to come home to.

She claimed that he regretted it the minute he realized what happened. Crying out about how he was going to propose and then rushing out without so much as a goodbye.

Oh how stupid he was to name drop you.

You almost wished he hadn’t, because that was how she had found you. After finding out that she was pregnant, she tried to reach out to Bokuto only to realize that he was telling the truth. He’d been with you for four years.

But did that really even mean anything anymore?

“It’s just- I just-” The girl shook her head. “I just want you to know that I never meant to hurt you. If I had known...if I had any other choice...”

“Actually, I’m sort of glad you reached out to me. Thank you for that. That was good on your part, seeing as I doubt he would have told me,” You smiled numbly, not capable of feeling anything at the moment.

It was like...your entire body was on shut down mode. It had become numb, desperately trying to block out the pain you were sure that was coming. And you, for one, were absolutely grateful. You didn’t wanna think... you didn’t even wanna fathom how broken you were gonna be.

So you didn’t. Instead you kept your thoughts quiet and relished in the numbness.

“You know...” You laughed bitterly, sadly shaking your head as you sighed, “Bokuto’s always wanted a kid. He kept begging me a few weeks ago to have one, but I said no. We’re both so young, you know? We had our whole lives together.”

You hadn’t meant to make her cry even more, but that’s exactly what your words did. They cut a knife through this random girl’s heart, causing her pain that she had stolen that from you. Bokuto, he had taken that from you as well.

“I’m sorry,” Once again, she apologized, but you weren’t much focused on that. Instead, your attention snapped towards the front door as you heard keys jingling outside. With a sharp push, your stomach dropped.

Bokuto was home.

“Hey hey hey! Babe whose car is that-”

Bokuto’s smile suddenly dropped as he walked into the scene, your dull eyes and the girl’s tearful ones ones trained on him. Immediately, his whole demeanor began to crumble down and he nervously looked between the two of you, his shoulders dropping.

“...outside. What’s this?”

“Bokuto, I believe you know her,” You were eerily calm as you pointed towards her, showing no emotion as Bokuto’s eyes flickered to her stomach. “This is Kayla. From Tokyo, right? I think you guys have much to discuss.”

Bokuto was at a loss for words as you rose from the couch, gesturing for him to take your seat. But instead of listening, he decided to make things difficult and run after you like a lost puppy as you made your way to the bedroom.

“Babe, babe wait! Y/N, please baby I can explain. I can explain, I can explain, I swear! Just let me, just please let me-”

“Bokuto,” You stopped him, holding up your hand and shaking your head. “I’m not in the mood, really. Just go talk with her alright? She came all this way to find me, so it’s rude not to.”

“But baby-”

“Go,” You suddenly became firm, gritting your teeth as you stared him. For a second, you took a small pause, and then Bokuto heard the words he never wished to hear his in life. “And don’t you ever call me that ever again, Koutaro.”

“K-Koutaro...?” Bokuto stuttered slightly, reeling back at the use of his first name. “But baby...y-you never call me that. Ever.”

“Oh yeah?” You couldn’t help but laugh on how clueless he was. I mean honestly, you never thought that Bokuto was stupid but now...“Well what the hell else am I supposed to call you? Read the fucking room Bokuto. Your pregnant fucking mistress is sitting on my couch, crying her eyes out and you’re worried about me calling you by your first fucking name? Get a god damn grip.”

For the first time that day, emotion began peaking out from your eyes. Pure anger bubbled up inside of your body, finally manifesting after holding it in for so long.

It felt good, in your opinion, to finally feel something. A delayed reaction, sure, but late was better than never.

“B-But-”

“Shut up,” You rolled your eyes at his trembling form. “I don’t wanna hear anything else from you. So go talk to her. Figure your shit out while I pack mine.”

“No!” Panic was evident in his voice as he suddenly grabbed your arms, preventing you from entering your bedroom. Shocked, you siteuggled in his embrace but Bokuto was extremely strong.

“What the hell? Let me go!”

“Y-Y/N! Baby y-you can’t leave me! You can’t! What about our plans? What about forever and always, you and me?”

“Did you think about that before you got drunk and fucked her?” You snapped harshly, causing him to whimper. “Exactly. So don’t come pulling that bullshit out on me, Bokuto. You’re the one that ruined that.”

“But-” At this point, he was searching for something, anything to make you stay as you shoved him off and then stormed in your shared room. “But baby I- we had this whole plan...I was gonna propose! Please, I...I even got the ring! Here I’ll prove it to you!”

While you were busy running around the room throwing all your stuff together, Bokuto suddenly dashed to the kitchen and retrieved a box he had been storing for a special occasion. He completely ignored the girl that was sitting on his couch, not even sparing her a second glance as he rushed back to you and dropped to his knees.

“See?” He hurriedly opened the box and desperately grabbed your hand, slipping the shiny diamond on before you could even protest. “I had it made for you, Y/N! Pure diamond, princess cut. It’s even engraved with your name baby! Please...”

You had to admit, you wanted to break down as Bokuto began to cry, looking awfully small as he kneeled by your feet. To make matters worse, he kept kissing your hand and mumbling tearful apologizes that yanked at your heartstrings.

By now, your initial exterior had began to crumble. Pain began to surround your heart, squeezing it so bad it almost felt like you were burning. A swell of tears gathered in your eyes, and you almost, almost gave in.

You almost sank to your knees and cried with him, almost pulled him into your arms because you didn’t wanna let go. You loved Bokuto, you truly did, and you wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of your life with him.

He was a good man, that probably made an honest mistake. He was everything you had ever wanted. And you were so tempted...so tempted to give in. Until you realized that you deserved better.

“I’m sorry,” Sniffling slightly, you yanked your hand out of his grasp and shook your head. “But I need to go. I can’t stay here anymore Bokuto...you ruined this. You ruined us, and now you have a woman in there carrying your child. You have the family you’ve always wanted. Don’t ruin that too.”

Hastily, you leaned down to press a bitter kiss on his forehead and then stood back up. Bokuto sobbed as he watched your figure retreat, standing high despite the heartbreak.

It was then that he realized that even though you were letting him go, you’d be just fine. You’d pull yourself together eventually, you were strong like that. You didn’t need him, but god, what about him?

He wasn’t sure if he could survive without you. He could barely even breathe and you hadn’t even walked out yet.

Was this what it was going to feel like from now on? Empty, hollow...meaningless?

“Please.”

One last time, he cried out of you. He begged you to stay.

But you knew you deserved better than that.

“I’m sorry.”

And with that, you left him behind. Forever.

#suna x reader #suna angst #bokuto x reader #bokuto angst #suna rintaro #bokuto koutaro #hq x reader #hq angst #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu!!

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jungkxook · 4 years ago

Text

—out of the blue. (m)

⟶ pairing: jungkook x reader

⟶ genre: youtuber/gamer!jungkook + fluff / smut

⟶ words: 5,204

⟶ rating: 18+

⟶ summary: catching your boyfriend bleaching and dyeing his hair for a livestream is definitely not what you expected — but it certainly has its perks.

⟶ warnings: established relationship, some attempt at humour, .2 seconds of sort of sub jungkook (you just like seeing him on his knees), you call jungkook a good boy, shower sex, hair pulling, oral sex, face riding, standing sex, breast play, cum eating, doggy style, unprotected sex, creampie

⟶ note: because blue haired jungkook has me feeling all sorts of things. also dedicating this to the lovely ryen @kithtaehyung because blue haired jungkook is getting her too and i hope this helps!! and thank you to the wonderful @gamerkooks and @stanrandomthings for always giving me inspiration for gamer jungkook <3

“What the hell are you doing?”

Jungkook has less than a second to react when he hears you bursting through the door of his bedroom, a guilty expression plastered on his face as if you’ve caught him in the midst of a much worse act than what he’s already currently doing ━ but the flustered scowl deepening your countenance is enough for him to certainly feel that way, because how else is he supposed to casually explain why he’s currently sitting shirtless in front of a camera?

Admittedly, the sight is odd enough, and there’s a split moment where your incredulous look is enough to make him feel as if he’s wronged you, and your six month long relationship with him, entirely before he remembers that he didn’t actually do anything wrong like cheat on you, but is actually just trying to dye his hair.

He’s sat in his gaming chair, camera and lights set up around him, and the monitor of his desktop all recording his face to the hundreds of thousands of viewers currently watching his livestream. He had told you well in advance about his aim to do a twenty-four hour live broadcast for his subscribers to both raise money for a donation and to countdown to his next subscriber milestone with the help of his friends ━ and had even asked you to help him plan the event, discussing it animatedly with you for the past month on various occasions ━ but mainly just because Jungkook is crazy enough to sit through a twenty-four hour stream and call it fun.

You had known most of how the entirety of the day would go. Starting from noon the previous day to now, almost an hour before the stream ends, thus far he’s done various gameplays from Minecraft to Overwatch to Among Us simultaneously with his friends who had offered to marathon with him the twenty-four hour event; had a period of time in which Jimin and Taehyung were over and cramped in his room to answer questions and talk to viewers but mostly just to create absolute chaos. You had been there for most of it, though you’re still trying to figure out if it’s a blessing or a curse that you were suckered into paying rent for your three bedroom apartment by Taehyung more than a year ago, and subsequently falling madly in love with Jungkook and forcing you to aid in his antics. You’ve been in a handful of his videos before, appearing in Twitch and YouTube streams, and in the background of vlogs in his channel and the channels belonging to the other boys; and, on that day for Jungkook’s twenty-four hour event, you had joined him at the start before being dragged away for work and then tried to pull an all-nighter with him until you crashed on the couch in the living room, and checking in on him occasionally to give him food and water and to just generally make sure your boyfriend isn’t dead.

Now, with the remaining final hour dwindling down, you had been in your room trying to finish last minute essay writing for school, with your phone propped up on your desk and Jungkook’s livestream playing as background noise to your studying. One minute, he had been playing a round of Among Us, and the next, when you had glanced up, he had the bottle in hand and the detrimental blue dye coating his hair in slick globs. It wouldn’t have been so shocking, had you not seen Jungkook an hour ago when he had his natural dark hair still, and now he had somehow managed to sneak in bleaching his hair in the time you had left him. Maybe it was your fault for not catching it sooner, if only because you had sheepishly taken a small nap amidst your studying only to wake up to a nightmare.

Which is where that leaves you currently, dishevelled demeanour standing at the threshold of his door after chasing over to his room, watching as Taehyung helps Jungkook sufficiently ruin his beautiful hair which you love so much.

“Uh… Dyeing my hair?” Jungkook finally answers, dumbfounded. He’s fortunate he had pulled off his shirt to avoid getting hair dye on it, an old towel now draped around his shoulders to catch any excess mess. He adds brightly, “We asked for suggestions on how to end the stream and someone said I should dye my hair, so Tae got the stuff.”

“You bleached your own hair?” You retort, exasperated. “When the hell did all this happen? I’ve been next door to you the whole time! What if your hair falls out? You should’ve gotten a professional to do it, not Tae━”

Taehyung looks inexplicably offended by your slandering remarks on his (lack of) hair styling skills, retorting with, “Yo, what the━?”

Jungkook blinks, as if just being made aware of what he’s actually doing.

“My hair’s gonna fall out?” he gaps. “Guys, what the hell? Why’d no one tell me?”

He looks from you to Taehyung then over at the comments on his livestream which are currently flooding with the sole topic of you. His eyes snag the first few that appear to him in the frenzied influx of words:

uh oh jungkook’s sleeping on the floor tonight

oh shit run bro

f in the chat for jk’s hair

get him y/n!!!!

“Dude, she’s just being dramatic,” Taehyung waves you off. He ducks out of the way when you reach out to Jungkook’s bed for a pillow and chuck it at the older boy’s head.

“And when he’s bald, then what━”

“No!” A helpless Jungkook exclaims suddenly. He gestures wildly to the stream, “Don’t give them ideas. The edits are gonna start pouring in.”

“Jeon, look, it’s too late to go back now,” Taehyung says. “You’ve got half your head covered in dye and three minutes to go with the stream. How bad can it be?”

A groveling sigh eclipses your lips as you push yourself forward. “Then at least let me help before you ruin it completely.”

Jungkook’s fortunate, to say the least, though he’s left wondering if you’re truly upset with him.

He finishes the countdown to the end of his twenty-four hour stream with you and Taehyung putting the last remaining globs of dye on his hair, a heartfelt goodbye to his viewers who marathoned the stream with him, and a promise to update them on the status of his hair when he washes the dye out.

And, just as soon as he’s shut his camera off, the mundane world returns to him.

It’s no longer millions of anonymous and faceless viewers watching him from the other side of their screens in the tiny bubble that is his room, but just you and Taehyung and the older boy’s frisky little Pomeranian dog and the threat of a wallowing regret as Jungkook thinks to himself, what the hell did he truly just do to his hair?

At some point, Taehyung retreats to his girlfriend’s house taking Yeontan with him, leaving you alone with Jungkook and he basks in the sudden cozy quiet after twenty-four hours of madness as the adrenaline rush begins to fade and mellow out. Back aching, joints cracking and popping as he stretches and moves, and eyes burning in the similar way they do from having stared at a screen for too long, but tenfold, he craves nothing more than to find your sweet and comforting touch to end such a long day.

He finds you in the living room already scrolling through your phone and your Twitter feed to read and marvel at all the comments and memes made by his viewers during his stream and his heart threatens to burst through his chest because you’ve always been so supportive of him and his fans, and they’ve always adored you and your endless interactions with them. So, surely, you can’t be mad at him for bleaching and dyeing his hair. Right?

As his arms come to wrap around you from behind, face nuzzling in the crook of your neck, he hears you bemoan, “You look like a Smurf came on your head.”

Wrong.

Well, not entirely, he guesses. You do lean into his chest, practically melting against him. A sluggish grin tugs at his lips and, instead, he chooses to ask, “Shower with me?”

“Aren’t you tired, Koo?”

“Baby,” he deadpans, and your heart flutters just a little bit, “by this point, I’m running solely on Red Bull and coffee that I’m positive I could fight the gods with my bare hands and win. In fact, I’ve had so much caffeine that I’m fairly certain I’ve ascended to the astral plane. Besides, I need to wash this dye out, and I could use some help. Sleep can wait.”

“Help,” You snort. “You’re such a liar. I already know what you want.”

“To spend time with my beautiful girlfriend? You’re right.”

“I’m not sucking your dick.”

He pulls his head back to look at you. Though he tries to look offended, there’s the tiniest of smirks on his face. “Wasn’t gonna ask you!”

You turn to properly face him in his arms and shoot him a dubious glance. He leans down to press a chilling kiss to your jaw, then nudges his nose against you in the same spot so that you’ll move your head. You do so, despite your prior scolding, and let him kiss the underside of your jaw down to your neck.

“Okay, fine,” You huff finally.

You relent, miraculously, but Jungkook had already guessed you would the moment he had found you in the living room and he couldn’t be happier.

He cherishes the moments alone with you, has come to know them well as he falls into a comfortable routine with you away from prying eyes over the last few months. Because sometimes, as he comes to learn, it’s hard to establish a relationship when his job requires him to be in the spotlight often. What is authentic and what is simply fabricated for views is difficult to discern, and yet you’re patient with him. Not everything to him is money and views and numbers, or what his next big plan is, or how you could potentially help him in some way (despite knowing that any video featuring you seems to skyrocket his views and land his videos on the trending page of YouTube more often than not because he knows everyone loves you more than him). You know when he’s his online persona and when he’s simply just Jungkook, and while there’s hardly any difference between the two, his online personality surely has to maintain a level of privacy and happiness that may not always be true.

At least with you, he can just be himself. He can finally be at ease.

Showering together is just one of the many acts of normalcy he cherishes with you. So, he turns on the shower and lets the bathroom get all warm and balmy as you undress. He’s the first one inside, hissing in delight as he lets the water run over his sore muscles, washing out the dye in his hair firstly so as not to get it on you and fortunately not making too much of a mess of blue dye in the tub. You’ve joined him in an instant when he’s nearly done, squeezing into the space in front of him as you shut the glass door behind you, the pane already beginning to fog and slick with droplets of condensation. He pulls you into him once more, nestling his chin on your shoulder as his hands come to wrap around you. They slide across your front, all wet and soapy, briefly gliding across your breasts, palms brushing against your nipples before traveling down to your navel.

“Congrats, baby,” You coo gently. “Twenty-four hours.”

He murmurs into your hair, “Missed you loads though.”

You turn to look at him finally, and it’s hard not to stare. Your eyes land firstly on his abdomen and the toned muscles there, trailing up to his arm and the pretty tattoos that decorate every inch of his skin, to his soft pink lips and his big eyes. Then, there’s the matter of his hair. The water has done most of the work in washing out the dye from his hair, now falling across his forehead and into his eyes and cheekbones, and it’s only then that you fully register the dye has worked as you struggle to find any remnants of his once-ebony-then-blonde locks. The blue hair is an obvious stark contrast to his natural hair and, you think, it is pretty, accentuating his radiant skin and making his eyes pop.

“I didn’t think you were actually serious all those times you said you wanted to change your hair.” Your lips are pursed as you survey him now, your fingers twirling a strand of his tresses around and around as you inspect it.

He smiles, catching your hand and pressing a quick peck to your knuckles. “Neither did I,” he admits sheepishly. “It sort of just happened.”

You pout. “I’m gonna miss your natural hair.”

“Do you really hate it blue?”

“I don’t hate it. Was more scared you’d ruin your pretty hair and make it all fall out.”

At this, Jungkook flashes you a cheeky smile. He holds his head a little higher. “So you still think my hair is pretty?”

“I think you’re a dork,” You clarify. “And, aside from the fact you almost gave me a heart attack, I’d say the blue is so pretty. Beyond pretty. Kinda hot, if I’m being honest.”

Because you’re not really mad, but it’s fun just to tease Jungkook and see his reactions. At the very least, he can sense this, as it’s apparent with the way his smile stretches even wider on his face.

“Hot, huh?”

“Mhm. But you didn’t hear that from me.”

He feigns a look of mock hurt. “Oh no. You must be really mad. Want me to make it up to you?”

“How are you gonna do that?”

“Well, what do you want from me?”

You take a moment to think it over, but the answer is already obvious enough. It’s one that even he knows, and one that has won you over the moment Jungkook was freed from his stream. You hum aloud, “You, on your knees, head between my legs, like a good boy. Think I can get a better viewpoint of your hair from down there anyway before I judge it.”

“Like a good boy?” A dark smirk tugs at his face. “So now who’s the needy one?”

He lowers his head so that he’s leaving a trail of sloppy wet kisses down your neck to your collarbones. As you let yourself get carried away for a moment, you wrap your arm around his neck, pulling him backwards until you’re pressed up against the glass door. He ducks even lower, kissing just above your left breast and then catching your nipple between his teeth. You swallow thickly, rubbing your thighs together, reminding yourself to respond to him.

“It’s not my fault when you were busy for the past day,” You pout. “And the blue hair really is sexy.”

“Aha!” he straightens up in front of you suddenly, a crooked smug smile on his face. “So I’m not just hot. I’m sexy.”

“You’re literally always sexy. And beautiful too. It’s almost unfair.”

“That’s even better.”

You tug your fingers at his damp locks. When you speak, your voice is a mix between urgency and a whine. “Jungkook. I could’ve already gotten off with my hand at this point.”

“Ouch, feisty!” He pokes his fingers at your sides. Then, nipping a little more firmly on the soft skin of your breast, murmurs huskily, “Alright, alright. But only if you call me a good boy again.”

Part of him is taunting you, but there’s a small sliver of intrigue that makes the thought in his head and the pretty words on your tongue excite him to no end.

Still, you choose to entertain him, maybe a little drowsily and entirely consumed by him, “I will if you let me ride your face.”

A rumble of a chuckle resonates from him. You find him on his knees in the next moment, wedging himself between your thighs. He nudges one of your legs and you follow the wordless command, hitching one thigh over his shoulder as you settle back against the glass door of the shower. He kisses at your hips as he dips his head lower and lower to where you want him, before swiping his tongue at your cunt, tasting all of you at once.

“Mmm, Koo━” A soft whimper sounds from you, making his head swim.

He wastes no time in lapping at your folds, tongue delving into you deeper and deeper as he cranes his neck. The wetness that pools between your legs and on the tip of his tongue is a sticky mess that he basks in just a little longer.

“Fuck,” he groans into your pussy, “you taste so fucking good. Missed this so much.”

His hands are big as they come to hold you close, cradling your ass, your thighs, your hips, anything to pull you into him while simultaneously pushing your thighs further apart.

You manage to find your voice and quip weakly, “Missed me or having your head between my legs?”

“You, definitely,” he murmurs. He busies himself by reaching out with his thumb to press circles against your clit. Your mouth falls open in a silent moan, hips rutting into his face. “All of you.”

“Jungkook━ Fuck━”

He burrows further into you, humming in response. His nose brushes against your clit, the muscle of his tongue a pleasant wet that makes you warm all over. You give another experimental swivel of your hips, grinding against his tongue just right. He pinches at your hips as if to probe you onward, and then you do it again, and again, desperately rocking your hips back and forth against him. Your fingers reach out to grab a fistful of his hair, clutching it so tightly he hisses. But you’re right. The blue locks look dazzling between your legs, being pulled by your hands as you push him further into you.

His eyes meet yours from below your waist, hooded and idle, enjoying the view as you squirm and writhe above him, shamelessly riding his face. Grinding against his chin, nose, and tongue, the slick wetness you leave behind glistens on his skin.

“Ah, Koo━” You cry out. “Fuck, I’m gonna━!”

Your orgasm hits you violently, sending you keeling. Your hips continue with reckless abandon, and Jungkook presses his finger against your clit a little harder, a little faster. The abrupt gushing warmth between your thighs sends your mind spinning, as the steam from the shower and your panting breaths begin to fog the bathroom. When your hips begin to slow, Jungkook laps at the rest of your leaking core before pulling away with a grin brandishing his shimmering face. He lets you pull him up eagerly, clumsy hands fumbling to hold either side of his face as you tug at him.

“God, you’re so hot, babe,” he sighs wistfully, smothering your lips with his for an all too chaste kiss, before leaning in once more to nibble at your lower lip.

“Wanna feel you, Koo,” You prompt urgently. “Want you in me.”

Jungkook hastens to comply, his hands falling to your waist. “Go on, then. Turn around for me.”

You don’t need to be told twice. You spin so that you’re facing the glass sliding door, your back to him. You watch him over your shoulder, momentarily admiring his well built stature, the tattoos that ink his body, and the water that shimmers on his skin. He has to push his wet hair up and away when it falls across his forehead and then he reaches down to grasp at his length, grip tight around his shaft so that he can pump himself sluggishly a few short times. It’s almost painful to watch him jerk himself off in front of you, the tip a burning red and glistening. He catches you staring and decides to catch you off guard when he grabs a hold of your hips with one hand. He yanks you towards him, your ass pressed firmly against his hips, making you jump from the startle, and grins when you look back at him.

Then, ever so slowly, he runs the length of his cock along your folds. Before you can brace yourself for the overwhelming rush of pleasure, he’s sliding his cock past your folds, burrowing into you deep. He curses behind you, his other hand flying out to steady himself by digging into your hip.

“Fffuck. Shit.” He dips his head so that his cheek is resting against your shoulder and sputters for air. “Jesus, fuck━ Been dying to feel you all day.”

He fits so snugly in you, so perfectly, just like always and you take him so well, coaxed by your own arousal. He ruts his hips forward into yours and you nearly fall forward before catching yourself by pressing your palms to the glass. Then, he’s grinding against you, small and precise thrusts that roll into your hips.

“Mmm, Jungkook,” you choke out. “You feel so━ So good.”

“Ah, shit,” he hisses. “Wanna wreck you so bad.”

He angles his chest a little more, pummels his dick into you in such a way that he’s hitting a different spot in you. His eyes stay fixated on the soft, round flesh of your ass and the way his cock slips so easily into you, brows screwed in concentration, jaw clenched. The slight bounce of your ass each time he rolls his hips firmly against you, the way you ricochet forward each time in tandem with his moves. You bow your head, pressing your temple against the glass door now tinted with condensation, only marked up by the imprints of your fingers grasping at anything. It’s almost sweltering hot in the shower now but you both pay no mind to it. He fucks into you with such languid, steady strides, cock beginning to throb and twitch in anticipation. You feel so wet, such a pitiless mess between your thighs already that it makes him growl.

“H-Harder,” You mewl. “Oh, Koo━”

He almost slips behind you in his eagerness to obey, awakening something animalistic in him, a yearning to just release all the tension in his core. This time, he adapts a measured pace, forceful thrusts that have you crying out in delight each time. One hand reaches up to grip at your shoulder to steady himself while his other slithers around your front to grasp at your breasts, all wet and supple, pinching at your nipples.

“So good,” he moans, pressing sloppy kisses just below your ear. His breath is hot as he pants behind you, sending tingles down your spine. “Fuck━”

His voice is cut off by a whine, hips bucking forward in an unsolicited manner as he feels his high drawing near. You lean your head onto his shoulder, stretching your arm out so that you can tug desperately at his hair. It’s a silent, simple command, but it’s one that he immediately understands even without you speaking.

“Wanna feel you━” You whimper. “Wanna see you.”

Jungkook nearly slips as he fumbles to pull out of you, hissing at the loss of warmth and friction. As soon as you’ve turned to face him, he wastes no time in closing the distance between you. He pushes his leaking cock past your folds once more and continues at the same pace as if he had never even stopped to begin with.

“Fuck,” he whines. “Not gonna last━”

You wrap your arms around his neck, drawing him even closer to you, as he presses you against the glass. He hitches one of your thighs around his waist, spreading your legs just wide enough to hit a certain spot that has both of you crying out. You’re clinging so tightly to him, fingers digging harshly into his skin in an attempt to alleviate the building pressure you feel. He knows you’ve almost reached your end when you resort to a gasping, moaning mess, writhing beneath his broad stature.

“Close, baby?” he hums.

You open your mouth to respond but can only muster a whimper. His pace treads over to heedlessly frantic, the sound of skin against skin and the lewd wetness filling the shower. Despite his hips pounding into yours so harshly, his fingers flutter so delicately under your chin, grasping it and moving your head just enough so that you’re facing him.

“Lemme see you,” he grunts. “Wanna watch you when you cum all over my cock. Always so pretty.”

“I━ I’m━ Fuck, Koo━”

But you can’t finish your thought.

You keep your gaze fixated on Jungkook’s, however exhausted and weary it may be. Your lashes flutter, brows knit together, and you suck your lower lip between your teeth, biting so hard Jungkook’s certain you’ll bruise it. Another few hard thrusts and then you’re reaching your high, overcome by such an intense burning that you can’t help but look away out of instinct. You cry his name, face contorting in pure pleasure, and chest arching to meet his. You’re clenching so tightly around him has him sputtering for air, nearly collapsing entirely against you. You’re near dripping around his cock which only means he almost slips from you with each draw of his hips that he makes. It’s why he sloppily rocks his hips into yours, desperate to reach his own high as well.

When you return to your senses, blinking away your blurry vision, you can make out Jungkook cooing into your ear, “That’s it, baby. Doing so well.”

You meet his gaze once more, only this time you’re perhaps even more tired. Hooded eyes watch him, silently probing him to his climax. He comes tumbling towards it, a few more short thrusts of his hips and, finally, he’s there. He slams his hips up into yours one final time, crying out, and then he’s releasing into you in an overwhelming abrupt gush. Only he can’t quite enjoy it because, out of genuine accident and driven by impatience to just get off, the last jerk of his hips hits you a little too hard.

It’s what causes you to slip backward and he, so lost in his own reverie, hardly has a proper grip on you or where he’s standing. When you lose your footing beneath you, slipping on the wet porcelain of the tub, and comes crashing down, he’s brought along with you. “Oh, fuck━!”

The both of you yelp from the surprise, your hands flailing out to brace yourself for the fall.

Fortunately, you land on him when you reach the bottom of the tub, courtesy of him grabbing onto you last second so that he can soften the blow upon impact.

Unfortunately, the breath is knocked out of him from the startle and from the sudden added weight of you on top of him with no warning.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” he groans.

“In hindsight,” You wince as you shift your weight above him, “maybe having sex in the shower again wasn’t the greatest idea. Remember last time when we knocked the shower curtain down and I had to get stitches on my elbow? It’s why we got the glass door installed, and then we had to lie to Tae about it.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me.” He tilts his head back, rubbing a hand over his face. Then, he flashes you an all too charming smirk. “Was kinda worth it though.”

You giggle, sounding so sweet and angelic, even despite the way his cum still leaks from you. Somewhere in the fall, his dick had slipped from you and now lays softening on his stomach which, really, is probably the worst part of the accident to him. He already misses the warmth of you wrapped around him, your mingling cum a dirty mess around him. You prop yourself up on his chest with your palms, but before you can even think to respond, you notice something out of the corner of your eye.

A small mass of fur in the shape of little Yeontan has just poked his head through the crack in the door, oblivious to you and Jungkook’s compromising position. And then, shortly following behind him, is his equally oblivious owner who must have forgotten something in the apartment to bring him back so suddenly.

“Tannie, get back here━ We gotta go━ Oh, Jesus, what the fuck?” Taehyung appears at the door for a millisecond before noticing the situation he’s just stumbled upon. Thankfully, he acts fast, and clamps a hand over his tainted eyes, clumsily scooping up Yeontan in his other hand. “Can you guys please stop fucking all over this damn apartment? My son’s eyes are too pure for this!”

And then he’s retreating, but not before bumping blindly into the doorframe, grumbling along the way. It’s silent for a moment as you and Jungkook gawk at one another; then you hear Taehyung leave the apartment once more, and the both of you dissolve into a fit of unabashed laughter.

“Are you okay?” You ask once you’ve calmed down enough as he reaches out to shut the shower off. You plant a kiss in your boyfriend’s hair. “You hit your head coming down.”

Jungkook’s heart swells at your gentle touches and smiles. “I’m fine,” he promises brightly. “You?”

“Well, you did just thoroughly fuck me, so━” You shrug innocently. “I’m kinda still too giddy to even care.”

“I’m gonna make it up to you,” he says. “For almost giving you a heart attack with my hair and for almost putting you in the emergency room again just now.”

The mention of his hair draws your attention to it once more. It’s not as wet as before, damp azure waves falling into his eyes that you brush away gingerly.

“Yeah,” You snort, “but I’ve decided I like your hair. Like, really like it.”

“Yeah?” he grins wide. “What was the deciding factor?”

You pause, as if to think for a moment. Exhaustion riddles your body and you know sleeping curled up next to Jungkook is nearing your future, but for now you let yourself entertain the last remnants of whatever lewd thoughts are still on yours and his minds before they fizzle away completely. You can’t help yourself anyway. The blue really is nice.

“Definitely the view of you eating me out,” You say. “And can’t forget how pretty it looks when I’m pulling at your hair.”

“Say no more,” he beams. “Then I’ll make it up to you by making you cum on my tongue again and again and again.”

The last thing he hears before he grabs at your cheek to softly pull you down to him for one last kiss, slow and ardent, is a bubbly giggle from you that delights him to no end.

“That’s a good boy.”

⟶ Feedback is always appreciated!

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absolutepokemontrash · 4 years ago

Text

Kid!MC/Teen!MC Needs someone to go to Parent Teacher Interviews for Them and Guess Who’s Available?

Masterlist

The brothers being bad babysitters/dad figures is something I love very much, I bet you all could already tell that considering the Fic/Headcanon series I have going on. I would just like you all to know that Asmo’s section is based on a true story. Anyhoo~ onto the Headcanons!

Why? Why Him? (Lucifer)

Is MC really dumb, or are they just a kid? No one knows.

Obviously MC asked Lucifer, the only competent one in the house, the most professional, hard-working, controlled-

MC got their things together and gave Lucifer the run down on their teacher(s) before Lucifer got too absorbed in extolling his own virtues in an intense internal monologue.

News flash Lucifer, this isn’t a Shakespeare play, you can’t have a dramatic monologue or soliloquy about how great you think you are

At the actual meeting, if MC is in there, no, MC is not actually in there. Lucifer will speak to the teacher as if MC isn’t there. As someone whose not a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down kind of person, Lucifer expects the teacher to behave the same and not spare MC’s feelings.

Feelings do not deserve to be spared if MC is being a nuisance. No fake-kid/little sibling of his gets to be the class idiot!

If MC’s doing very well academically, he expects to be pointed at projects or tests they’ve done and the grade on it. It really makes him proud to see MC doing well.

Even if they’re not the best academically, if they’re not failing and they’re doing well in other aspects of school, he’s proud.

If MC really struggles in a school environment and just hates it there but they’re still keeping their head above water, they get a head pat of approval.

On the drive home, if MC came with him to the parent teacher interviews and everything went well, he just happens to turn onto the street that has a Baskin Robin’s or something of that caliber.

If they didn’t go, he picks something up on the way back.

No fun treats if MC is being a disruptive little heathen in class, no kid under Lucifer’s care is going to be the class Mammon. Not on his watch.

MC was busily stuffed their face with the treats that were gifted to them. Lucifer had to hold himself back from rolling his eyes at the kid’s blatant disregard for basic table manners when it came to sweets.

“Is everything the teacher said true?” Lucifer asked, MC looked up at him with a smile.

“Yep!”

“Good, good.” Lucifer held out his hand and patted them on the head. “You’re doing well. Keep it up.”

“Geez,” MC mumbled as they continued to stuff their face. “Can you get anymore affectionate?”

“Don’t be sarcastic, MC. It’s uncouth.” Lucifer said sternly. “Besides, I’ll have you know that many people enjoy my headpats. I’m quite affectionate.”

“Really now? Name one person.”

Lucifer opened his mouth to respond, but no words came out. He and MC stared each other down, one pair of eyes much more nervous than the other. Spoiler, MC was still calmly eating their treat as they maintained eye contact.

“…Cerberus.”

“If you’re reaching for Cerberus, you’ve already lost.”

…his pride was under attack. Right in front of his desert…

“You’re grounded.”

“Worth it.”

*Rides by on a Skateboard* School is for NERDS (Mammon)

Pff! Stupid human! He’s not goin’ to some lame parent teacher conference-

Wait! What’s with that face?! Ugh… fine. MC’s gone and forced his hand with those damn puppy dog eyes…

Mammon does not dress up for this event, he dresses like he would every day, maybe throw on some designer stuff to let all the parents and teachers know he’s hot shit.

If MC goes with him, he pulls up in his beloved car and takes up two parking spaces (pure evil.). Every parent present already hates him, but at least the other kids there are impressed with MC’s sweet ride. MC would have gained some street cred if Mammon hadn’t managed to trip up the stairs to the classroom in front of everyone.

He’ll act way to casual with the teacher, turning the parent chair backwards and sitting down so he can lean on the seat.

Mammon gets bored crazy quickly while the teacher lists and explains all the stuff the class is learning, so his eyes begin to wander to any and all displays in the classroom. Projects, annoying posters, class pet, anything is more interesting than this teacher’s explanation.

When MC finally becomes the main topic of the interview, he’s all ears. MC’s doing great in school academically? Ha! Nerd! Maybe giving MC a playful noogie and interrupting the whole interview wasn’t a good idea, but whatever.

If MC’s failing anything, or just isn’t that gifted when it comes to grades, it’s very much a “Aw man me too” from Mammon.

This teacher is speaking with the Great Mammon, the first demon in RAD’s history to fail three semesters in a row. If this teacher thinks bad grades will phase him, they’re dead wrong.

Grades don’t mean anythin’ about smarts anyway! I mean, look at him! He’s a fuckin’ genius but he can’t get through a history test without sobbing even though he LIVED THROUGH MOST OF IT.

MC gets treats no matter what’s up in class. Though, if MC didn’t go with him, he’s likely to forget and just order something for the two of them when he gets back home.

“Goddamn teachers and their rambling!” Mammon whined, grabbing a slice of pizza from the open box on his coffee table. “You owe me, MC! Ya really do!”

“Yeah yeah yeah.” MC said, they leaned over and rolled a pizza slice into a pizza-scroll then proceeded to eat it like a veggie roll. “How do you think I feel, listening to them every day? You know how long it takes to get to the actual class material?”

“Five years?”

“Ugh! Five years if I’m lucky! I swear, I know more about my teacher’s grievances with like… five of my classmates than I do about trigonometry, and guess which one’s on the test next week?”

Mammon winced in sympathy, then remembered he was supposed to be whining and went back to it. “School’s shit and a waste of money, ya should drop out as soon as you can and help me run my new business.”

“You mean your pyramid scheme?”

“It’s not a pyramid scheme, MC! It’s legit! It’s a multi-tiered marketing-”

“It’s a pyramid scheme.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SOCIAL INTERACTION (Leviathan)

Everyone else must have been sick or something for MC to have asked Levi. He’d flat out refuse to go otherwise.

So, Levi couldn’t exactly go to the interview in his usual “I haven’t left my room or changed clothes in eight weeks” look. With the help of MC, he was able to find his military uniform at the back of his closet.

Asmo nearly fainted when he saw Levi in the uniform, not because “oooo, a man in uniform~”, it was because the outfit was so crumpled and wrinkled that it made it physically painful to look at. No time to iron and wash, the conference was in an hour!

Levi (and MC if they went with) rolled up to the school in a less than impressive ride, but one look at the uniform and all the other people present went “yep, time to be respectful (tm)”

For the first time in his life Levi was more intimidating than Lucifer! And he wasn’t even trying!

When the teacher starts explaining the course material, Levi spaces off in horror as he realizes he remembers literally nothing from school (AND HE’S STILL IN SCHOOL!) all that’s running through his head is “A squared + B squared = C squared” and “the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell”.

The actual interview was the least interesting part of the trip, the real stuff happened when Levi passed by some art on display in the hallway and something caught his eye-

Those colours… that hair… that adorable smile..!

IT WAS HER! LEVI’S PRECIOUS RURI-CHAN IN ALL HER GLORY!

Levi immediately started fawning over the art class fanart and by sheer coincidence, one of the kids walking through the hallway happened to notice.

The kid asked MC if their… parent and or guardian liked anime. MC responded with “obviously.” Levi then asked the kid if they drew his adorable Ruri-chan. The kid said no, and that they drew the My Hero Academia fanart a few rows down.

Levi was absolutely floored that there were two anime fans in one class, then his entire world shattered when MC explained there was more anime art inside the art room and other classrooms.

H-hang on… did that mean that… a lot of people here… liked anime..?

Levi needed a while to process. No snacks on the way home…

Levi and MC were sat in the back of their Uber, Levi, the Avatar of Envy himself, was having his entire sense of reality warped. S-so much anime fanart… in a school of all places..! What did this mean for the future of anime?!

“Levi. Stop.” MC sighed. “If this were an anime, the camera angle would be doing that thing where it’s right on the bridge of your nose and dramatic music plays in the background.”

“S-so many kids in your class like a-anime huh..?” Levi stuttered, weakly trying to smile. “Must be nice..?”

“Oh, that’s just my class. The other classes and grades have their fans too.”

“Oh… really?”

“Levi,” MC stopped looking out the window and looked at the otaku that was having a full scale silent mental breakdown. “Anime isn’t even a niche interest anymore. It’s a pretty casual thing to watch now. At least a third of my class watches- Levi?”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH! ANIME! A THIRD OF THE CLASS?! ANIME… HIS PRECIOUS ANIME… WAS BECOMING A NORMIE INTEREST! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

“Levi?” MC waved their hand in front of their spaced out demon’s face. “Leviiiii? Okay he’s dead.”

The Know it All (Satan)

Ah, a smart choice, MC. Satan would be glad to help further their education. He’ll do everything in his power to make sure that the human’s brain is fed all that sweet sweet knowledge.

Satan can’t dress himself normally, MC had to coax him into a suit jacket, but he still only wore one sleeve.

MC was coming along to the interviews whether they wanted to or not, it’s important to hear what they need to improve on from the teacher themselves after all.

The two arrived pretty early, so Satan asked MC for a tour of the school. It was pretty tame until they reached the library. Satan was horrified at the state of some of the books…

Their spines lined with duct tape… pages missing and torn… someone apparently used a taco as a book mark…

The first thing Satan does when it’s time for his interview is demand the teacher take better care of the library, even though they’re not the librarian. MC tries to explain this, but Satan is too distraught to listen to reason.

He enjoyed hearing about the course material, but he made it known if MC thinks the assignments are too easy that they need to be given more challenging work. THEIR BRAIN NEEDS TO BE STIMULATED DAMN IT.

It was up to MC to either agree with Satan and nod to the teacher, or make frantic eye contact with them to try and communicate “NO DON’T PLEASE”.

Similar to (ugh) Lucifer, as long as MC is doing their best, he’s happy for them.

…but if they are in any way in the running for valedictorian he is HELPING THEM WIN.

He decided to stop at a cafe or bookstore to let MC pick out a “congrats on surviving your pitiful school” present after the interviews.

MC gleefully perused the shelves of the bookstore, there were so many books too look at…

“I’ll buy you as many books as you’d like, MC, just,” Satan shuddered slightly. “Promise me you won’t treat them like those poor library books…”

MC put their hand over their heart. “I swear on the duct taped book spines that I will never treat a book like that.”

“Good… good…” Satan breathed a sigh of relief and went back to looking at his book about cats.

“Are you… reading a Warrior Cats book..?” MC asked tentatively.

“Yes, why?”

“Satan, put that back.”

“I Will Seduce the Teacher For the Sake of Your Grades, Don’t Worry.” (Asmodeus)

Oh MC dear! He’d be delighted to go! Just let him get ready~

Asmo may not be the best choice, but he was at least going to be the best dressed person at that conference. (And MC just had to come too so all the other parents could be jealous of how well coordinated their outfits are)

He teased MC a little by saying he was going to flirt with their teacher to make sure they passed the class, but he was just kidding! …but he made sure to ask if their teacher was cute, he needed to know!

While waiting for his turn, Asmo flirts with some of the single parents, if he doesn’t see a wedding ring, they’re fair game.

Once his time slot arrived, MC realized that Asmo is one of those “my child has done and will do nothing wrong ever” types. This may have ended up working in MC’s favour if they were a class nuisance.

If MC is doing very well in sports, clubs, grades, anything, Asmo is fawning over them and gushing to the teacher about how great, smart and adorable they are.

Asmo surprisingly does not exactly flirt with the teacher, he was just teasing MC after all. But um… if MC’s teacher just happens to be cute and young, he may turn up the charm, just a little. Enough to make the teacher giggle and make MC cover their face in embarrassment.

After the interviews Asmo will probably schedule a nice day out for the two of them, shopping, a movie, mani pedis, something fun!

The real weird stuff happens in the months after the interviews… if Asmo did lightly flirt with the teacher, MC gets quite a few questions about their guardian. Questions that ask if Asmo is single in not as many words…

Oh lord, MC’s teacher developed a crush on Asmo.

Nail painting night was supposed to be a fun occasion, but MC was hopping mad and embarrassed. Asmo didn’t seem to notice as he continued to paint the little human’s nails.

“And then I told Phenex to get lost. The nerve of that little monster, right MC?” When MC didn’t reply, Asmo looked up and tilted his head. “MC?”

MC’s angry face would have been much more threatening if they weren’t just so adorable, but it was getting the message across.

“MC..?”

“Asmo.” MC’s glare deepened. “My teacher wants to know if you’re single.”

Asmo blinked a few times, before he hit his tongue to keep from laughing. “Really now~. I knew they’d be madly in love with me-”

“WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIIIIIIIIIIIS?!”

Oh My Demon King is That a BAKE SALE?! (Beel)

Of course Beel said yes! He’d gladly go to MC’s parent teacher interview!

He even put on a nice outfit :D he ended up looking a bit like a secret serviceman guarding MC, the tiny president.

Beel stopped for McDonald’s on the way there, all the other kids were so jealous of MC when they stepped out of the car eating fries.

But a little something something caught Beel’s eye when he and MC walked into the school… was that a… bake sale?

MC quickly explained that the bake sale was fundraiser for their class trip that year and the snacks weren’t complimentary. He had to pay.

And pay Beel did. He cleared out the entire table. MC’s grade’s overnight trip was going to be decadent as hell. That was no longer a crowd funded thing, that trip was privately funded by a tall buff ginger secret service member and this tiny in comparison child.

Kids are incredibly blunt, just like Beel, so when a random kindergarten kid wandered over, looked up at Beel, and very knowingly said “you’re very tall”. Beel was like “yeah”. The kid then said “what’s it like being that tall?”

Beel’s response to this kid’s question was to pick them up and hold them for a few seconds before placing them back down. For just a few moments this kid knew what it like to be over 6’4. Of course, more kids swarmed in and asked to be picked up.

Sure it was cute, but Beel now has an army of kids ranging from kindergarteners to third graders.

Finally, the conference actually began. Beel snacked the entire time and dutifully listened to everything the teacher had to say.

After the interviews are over, he checks with MC to make sure everything the teacher said was true and that they weren’t lying. If all was well, the two made their exit.

They stopped at Wendy’s on the way home.

“I’m so full…” MC groaned, Beel held up a massive cookie.

“So I can eat this?”

“No. Gimme that.” MC took a very defeated bite out of it. “My stomach says no but my mouth says yes…”

“I don’t want you to get a stomachache, MC,” Beel said worriedly. “No more snacks.”

“It’s a little late for that. It’s past nine and I’m still eating, there’s no way I’m getting to sleep at a reasonable hour.”

“Oh…” Beel mumbled. “I may have not completely thought this through.”

“*Snore* Huh? Wha? MC’s Grades? Uh… Fuck…” (Belphie)

MC must be failing a class or something because why on earth would they pick Belphie otherwise.

They ask him to go while he’s delirious from just waking up from a nap, he sort of half nods and mumbles some gibberish before going back to sleep.

MC had to basically carry his ass to the school. Belphie drooled all over them in the waiting room, and when it was their time to go into the interview, Belphie had to be manually put into the chair and slapped awake.

He barely listens, he just sits and nods along with whatever the teacher is saying. The teacher could say MC brought an alligator to school and he’d just go “uh huh…” “mmmph… yep…” “really now?” then yawn.

The only thing that could possibly get Belphie to be interested is if MC is studying space. If they are, than boy howdy is Belphie suddenly interested in their education.

Other than that? *snore*

If MC is in fact failing or doing poorly, MC’s teacher asks to see another one of MC’s guardians at a later date. Their plan failed miserably.

MC drags Belphie out of the school and yells at him for not helping them. Belphie, still sleep delirious, tries to press the snooze button. MC does not have a snooze button.

“Belphie!” MC shouted, shaking the Avatar of Sloth awake. The House of Lamentation’s resident bastard was somehow sleeping standing up outside. “HOW COULD YOU?!”

“Eh?” Belphie half-snorted and looked around confused. “What’d I do? Where are we?”

“At my school! You said that you’d go to my parent teacher interviews!”

“…MC I don’t think I’d pass well for you.”

“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO GO AS MY GUARDIAN!”

“Sheesh,” Belphie murmured while he rubbed the remaining sleep from his eyes. “You humans are so noisy.”

MC looked up at their dearest demon friend, and gave him their best glare. “I’m going to take all your fancy temperature changing pillows and switch them with normal pillows you traitorous bastard.”

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mochikeiji · 4 years ago

Text

Enough For Me

Request: "Congratulations on 1k!!! you deserve it, you’re a really good writer. Can i request prompt 12 “please don’t cry” angst to fluff with yuuta from jjk. thank you, congrats."

12. "please, don't cry."

↠ Pairing: Okkotsu Yuta x Reader

↠ Warning: angst to fluff

↬ Word Count: 1.5k

↳ from Go! Go! Gogatsu Event

When did every thing become so loud?

One minute you were similing. Laughing loud with a hint of the obvious enjoyment masked on your features. Then second you're staring to nowhere but silence greeting you. An expression so dim that the light in your eyes wasn't present as well. Left at the forest training grounds, the others had already gone back to their dorms. You told them you were staying for a bit for extra training when in reality, you were looking for an outlet without anyone witnessing your hour of vulnerability.

Stupid clan and their elders. As disrespectful as it may sound, you understood now why Gojo despises them. Loud it was to the point it deafens your ears; the murmurs of a child cast away from the bloodline because of the mockery it holds. A no good sorcerer was never welcome in families like yours. People would still chew on your head even when you have your backs turned on them. So frustrating it was to shoulder a burden of their devilish gossip and expectations.

At first it was alright. You handled it well. But to the extent where one of the higher ups brought it up during a meeting? How many people know of you and the disappointment you carry?

Gojo had his fist clenched that day. Maki understood you more than anyone, having to be someone who ran away from her clan as well. Inumaki and Panda did their best in comforting you, telling you that humans are weird to drag other humans down when they're the same race. That was just being so entitled, said Panda. You however, convinced your comrades you were fine. You were used to it. And it was fine.

It didn't matter what other's say as long as other's knew you for what you weren't, right?

That doesn't mean you couldn't help but become overwhelmed of the impact they had on you. Like knives forcefully shoved their ways through your heart. The pack of negative energy should've been enough to form a large curse that could take you.

Loud it was indeed. To have so many people shit their way into your life when you only wanted to live yours and not bother theirs.

You gulped down the heavy lump in your throat. Caught up in the fog of profanities from the world. Who were you kidding, you weren't Maki who can handle all this thrown at her. Tumbling and falling, that was all you knew about yourself in your whole life. The nails that grip in your palms pierced through the skin as blood trickles down, no amount of pain could level the amount of pent up emotions you buried in your heart.

Perhaps you've were born in the wrong time and place. If only you were a simple civilian, maybe life wouldn't be so bad. A loving family would be there, instead of the ones that were throwing their unfulfilled dreams to their children and controlling of their destiny.

The look in your mother's eyes will forever haunt you. Looking already as tired as you were, her eyes spoke more emotion than you could ever endure as loveless, empty ones met your teary gaze that very day.

"I only wanted a daughter who could've done so much for me as I've given her life after birth."

Your heart throbs, soon you were down on the dirt covered ground on your knees. The weight of her words colliding in the world you swore was a safe space for you. It shouldn't matter. Not when they've cast you away and yet, no matter what there is, she was still your mother.

And still the pain is as fresh as ever coming from the one you used to call, "family."

As loud as your world was, your cries were louder and clearer this very night. As if with all your might, you wanted to scream from above on how this was truly unfair. Wanting someone— anyone to hear you curse at the world you were forced to live in. It hurts your lungs, it was indeed hard to grasp small bits of oxygen when your insides felt like they were shrinking from the compact.

You wish you could scream at your mother that deep inside you still loved her. Even as a child who never received the motherly love they deserved, you loved her dearly. It was by instincts and the remains of your vision as a baby, being held in someone arms in hushing your cries.

The surface felt so firm unlike you remembered how it was when you were young. Yet the warm embrace felt nostalgic as it shielded you from the cold blistering wind of the night, you find yourself searching against the surface without a care of any danger or anything anymore. You wanted to be comforted for once. To not feel alone.

"Please don't cry."

Small hushes drowned out your sobs, an arm wrapped firmly around your waist while the other pets your head at the outmost caring matter. Curling closer, your hand held the one on top of your head. Taking in the rough texture, but reminding yourself that someone was now here in your time of need. Here after being away most of the times.

"Yeah, it's me." sensing your troubles as he averts his gaze away from you as if he was embarrassed. "I heard what happened. I managed to finish up much just to get here." next to him was the blade he carries around. Probably less hazardous as to why he place it down.

"Yuta.." sobbing as you clutched on the white material he wore. He immediately reverts back to soothing you in your distressed state. Something about the way he holds you only made you tear up more. It broke his heart in pieces to see you hold onto him as if he was the only person left to anchor yourself. And here he thought he had it worse back then, your body language brought this resemblance to the girl he used to hold just as he was doing now.

"Shh, I promise you that none of those words said about you is true."

Easier said, he knew that. It was easy to reassure someone of their thoughts, but it's not that easy to erase. The mind is a wondrous and torturous place to be in. Old memories can be dug out to the surface and you'd still feel the emotion like it just happened yesterday. Oh if you had Yuta's vision of you, you'd believe in his words.

A strong role model like you is exactly the reason why Yuta aims to be the strongest as well. To help people realize that strength isn't found in the words of other human beings, but within yourself. Yes, it's a harsh world we live in. Those who feel lowly amongst themselves would drag those above them. And those who feel the surge of entitlement snarls at those below them.

But no matter who it is that doubts you, and your potentials, there would always be someone behind you, with the glimmer in their eyes, you are their hope and inspiration in some ways.

That is what Yuta murmurs next to your ear, your cries now subsided to focus on his voice. "You're doing great. We've seen it. I've seen it." facing you with his boyish smiles, you wondered how'd this guy who came looking like a ragged mess become someone twinkling brighter than the stars above the night sky. It was contagious, it made you smile so minimal.

"There's that pretty smile." chuckling, he pats your head softly like treating a little kid. Yuta knows deep down that he can't fully resolve the thoughts inside of you— one of these days you'll have these moments again. And it saddens him because he's often away from you. Yet he's breathless at the fact that you're able to hold yourself off with all these tormenting you.

"You're amazing, darling." came out lower than a whisper before his lips closed in with yours. Last time he kissed you boy was he sweating buckets. He wasn't even as bold as now to be able to initiate first and pull you flush against his chest. But the erratic pace of his heart still was the same as ever. The loudness that had clouded you vanished. All you could hear now were pleasant chorus played by the crickets of the night and the wind lacing together throughout the atmosphere.

He promises to do much more with you for the time being. Help you mend the wounds no one can see and assist with the battles you two could only share and understand. One day as he stated before he would walk through the doors of your clan and prove to them that you were the diamond in the rough they've thrown but he's found.

You were his own butterfly. Beautiful to his eyes, you bestowed your wings; and to yours you cannot see but for people to admire.

"Give yourself more credit. You've done so much, my love."

#okkotsu yuuta #yuta okkotsu fluff #okkotsu yuta #yuta okkotsu x reader #yuta okkotsu x you #yuuta okkotsu #yuuta okkotsu x reader #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk yuuta #jjk x reader #yuta okkotsu #yuuta x reader #raines: gogatsu event

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madametrashbin · 3 years ago

Text

Wishful Dreaming

In which I pretend Part 3 of Inazuma’s story doesn’t exist and everyone is alive before shit goes down. Yes, people who read this, it’s time for best friend headcanons/drabbles/whatever the hell this is with Teppei. Honestly, it’s just no thoughts head empty right now and I might have gone off tangent a lot.

(And by a lot, I mean the majority of this piece, probably... by the way, credits to @streimiv and @myuni-moon for making my brain be hyper focused on Self Aware Cult Genshin... I can’t get it out of my head as of right now.)

Enjoy, even if it’s never going to be beta-read by anyone and I will never go back to edit this even if I find mistakes in this later on... and I also don’t know where my brain went for this, but what’s done is done.

I’m not even sure if I did his personality correctly, ahaha... (；^ω^)

(I’m going to project my denial in this, so please know it might be wince inducing and incredibly self-indulgent.)

The sun is bright at this time of day, the gentle breeze flowing through the tranquil lands of Inazuma, leaving those who are experiencing the nice morning in a blissful escape from its current reality.

...much like a young foreigner who had left their current abode, leaving behind a note for their caretakers to see as they wander around the land of Eternity for some true fresh air and peace of mind away from the group that had more or less made their life a little too suffocating as of late.

It is also incredibly lonely in there, as they come to understand that no one (for the most part) look at them like they were a regular human... like they were them.

So they now wander, taking in the rarity of solitude that does not come as easily as one might think. Inazuma is beautiful, even if they know that the peace they see around these parts are but a veil that shields the horrible reality going on around them.

(They know what was happening outside the city, outside the teapot they were living in since they were brought here. They’ve experienced it happening before, many times in fact. They know what will happen, and they’re determined to change it. They just need to find a certain someone, and then they’re set.)

Meeting Teppei was something you didn’t really expect all that much, considering you knew he should be still a part of the logistic division of the Resistance Army and would be busy in their current base that was all the way to Yashiori Island.

Yet by sheer luck, or by fate, you meet the good fellow on Narukami Island and had managed to make a pretty good friendship with him over the course of coincidental meetings.

You’ve come to learn a few things about the young man, and it was that he was a pretty trusting guy, didn’t even think twice of being friends with you... which was a little worrisome, considering what happened in the actual storyline.

That’s okay though, you’ll make nothing happens to him... he is one of your only true friends in this world, after all.

“Teppei.”

They call to him as the Resistance Samurai turned his head away from the sight of the Tenshukaku to them.

“Is there anything you wish for? I mean, if you could have one wish granted, anything you want, what would it be?”

The young man looked rather confused at them, before they briefly clarified that they were just curious. As much as they enjoy the peacefulness of silence, they wanted to know what he really wanted... wondering if he really wanted a Vision, for the acknowledgement of the Gods.

“What would I wish for...”

The young man was quiet for a while, no doubt mulling it over before smiling when he comes to an answer, his head lifting to look at the glimmering stars.

“I would wish for the war to end... for the Sakoku Decree and Vision Hunt Decree to be abolished so people won’t have to suffer anymore.”

“Really? Not a Vision, or something like that?”

“Well, having a Vision would be nice, but thinking about it... I think it’s better if everyone is happy. A lot of people are suffering, and even if I did get a Vision, it’s still pretty difficult to win the war against the Shogunate.”

They could only hum quietly in understanding after that, not really certain what else to ask him before he gives them the same question.

What do they wish for?

To go home. They would have said, but they chose not to because they knew there was probably little chance for them to be allowed to go home... Their “acolytes” are rather over-protective and notably possessive towards them, probably rampaging around Inazuma right now in search of them.

Well, they at least know what they’re going to do once they inevitably find them.

“Isn’t it time you should head back to your camp, Teppei?”

“Huh? Oh, right! It’s getting late! Then, if I have time, I’ll see you again!”

And he’s off in a rush, disappearing when he turned around the rocky walls and out of their sight. At the same time as he left, the bushes behind them rustle, and a frantic Zhongli appears with Venti following behind... both relaxed significantly once they saw them in perfect condition.

“We’ve been looking everywhere for you, Your Grace. It’s dangerous for you to go outside on your own like that.”

“Please don’t worry us like that again.”

They immediately take to their sides, quickly ushering them to head back to the Teapot before they stopped them in their tracks.

“Your Grace?”

“I need to do something. Will the both of you accompany me for this?”

...and by the following morning, an official announcement is made to all of Inazuma with the abolishment of both the Sakoku Decree and Vision Hunt Decree.

Teppei is rushing over to them with a beaming smile on his face when they meet again that noon, the young man happily shares the good news with them while they simply smiled and nodded along with what he said even if they knew the reason behind it.

They don’t tell him anything, nor mention that it was thanks to him that it ended... well, what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

Extra, because why not:

It becomes a frequent part of your days now that the War in Inazuma was over. Hanging out with Teppei as often as you could, granted you’d have a few people trailing in the shadows at all times, watching over you so you don’t pull the same stunt again.

You have to spend a bit of time giving warning glares behind you whenever Teppei mentions the cold chills that makes his bones shiver despite the relatively warm weather.

When the two of you get roped up into a bit of trouble (whether by lingering Fatui grunts, stray Ronins or local Treasure Hoarders seeking to rob you), Teppei would always jump in between you and them, saying he’ll protect you as he holds his spear (that he brings with him out of habit).

...you thinks it’s endearing with how he’s trying to be brave, as you can see his hands shake just a tad bit due to the numbers.

But as much as you want to let him have his moment, you prefer that your friend doesn’t get himself hurt and therefore skillfully lead him away from the danger while the rest (your cult) dealt with them.

When you feel like the divine treatment is starting to get too overwhelming, and you’re feeling a little too lonely, you always make your way to Teppei who is there to provide comfort even if you never really talked about what’s troubling you.

Your friendship with Teppei is strong, even if you rarely talk about yourself to him and how he’s told you practically everything about himself.

There’s just something about that trust that bring you a lot of comfort... it gave a different feeling compared to Zhongli or Fischl’s kind of trust... it was warmer, and felt more like home.

You’re also very adamant in keeping him away from the whole cult business, not wanting him to think of you like how the others did... you don’t want to lose that friendship that practically kept you sane in this world.

The amount of times you have to keep reminding your cult to leave him be is absurd, and as much as they protest about him, the fact you’re upset at them for that is enough to get them to stop.

...for a while, at least. They go at it again for a while when Teppei does something they don’t like until you actually snapped at them. They stopped bothering him after that.

If Teppei does eventually find out about the cult, which will most likely happen because of Kokomi, you would be genuinely terrified in the beginning of it until he gives you proper reassurance that it doesn’t change anything.

Now he’s allowed to see you in the Teapot, often visiting with curious snacks he finds and occasionally sleeping over when you are feeling particularly lonely.

Overall, a very pleasant friendship to have. Being one of the few you can really be open with and not be concerned about how you’re viewed as.

Wholesome boy will always have your back whenever you need him... even if he is a little intimidated by the Raiden Shogun and the other intimidating acolytes that are a part of your cult.

#self aware genshin #genshin cult stuff #genshin impact x reader #yandere genshin x reader #I believe in platonic friendships #I have no braincells left #it was 12am when I started writing this #I barely slept before that too #idk what to tag honestly #tagging is hard #*dramatically screaming*

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winter-soldier-vibes · 3 years ago

Note

hi! request for one where reader struggles w depression a lot but hides it, tho it’s been getting worse recently and only bucky has noticed the small signs. then one night after no one seeing her the whole day or maybe something happened he went to check on her but she wasn’t in her room and he panics only to find her on the roof and just talks her down <3 all the love

Of course! I hope you're okay love❤❤❤. I saw another anon request something a lil similar in my ask box but I can't find it, maybe it got eaten, but I hope you like this!

Word count: 3,400 (ish)

Warnings: suicidal thoughts, depression, close to an attempt, Bucky talks about HYDRA, feelings of worthlessness.

A/N: This deals with very heavy subject matter, please do not read if you are in a dark place. I am here to talk if you want but I encourage you that if you feel this way in ANY way, no matter how severe, to reach out to someone. I also just wanted to say that the way someone talks someone down is never the same, some people may find a different approach more helpful or realistic. I wrote it this way because this is what I feel in my experience would have been helpful to hear. So please, if you don’t think it’s the way someone should talk someone down - please don’t come at me for it.

Overnight

People often don’t notice the small signs. The smiles that don’t reach the eyes, the dark circles from lack of sleep, the laughs that slowly become more forced. People don’t often pick up on those things right away. They happen slowly, as depression will often manifest. It’s rarely ever a flip of a switch shut down, happy one day and sad the net. Anxiety was like that, small things can trigger panic attacks. But with depression, it was this slow ache that grew in your chest, this dull cloud that made everything darker day by day.

These things rarely happen overnight.

You don’t know what caused this episode. You had struggled with depression and would go through some really low episodes before returning to baseline. It was never great, but it was...manageable. Most of the time. Some things could help you predict when you would go into another episode but you felt yourself slipping and you weren’t quite sure why.

You started withdrawing from the team. Subtly, not all at once. That would cause too much concern and the last thing you wanted was to be a burden. Especially with something like this, you didn’t even have an explanation.

It started slow, training on your own, missing team dinners, that sort of thing. If they were going out to celebrate or staying in for a movie you would slip away to your room where you didn’t have to worry about hiding it.

You didn’t want to be alone, you already felt so goddamn lonely. But somehow being lonely and surrounded by people who loved you hurt more.

The team chalked it up to you wanting to be alone, a bad day, being tired, etc. Whatever recycled excuse you gave them didn’t phase them. At least, not at first.

See, people who have experienced similar things will pick up in the small signs that others show. Someone who knows what anxiety is like will often be the first to pick up on nervous habits and tics. Often people notice when someone’s energy is coming from adrenaline and caffeine rather than sleep when they’ve done the same thing. Someone who knows what it’s like to feel hopeless and not want to reach out - they notice the small signs of withdrawing.

He noticed pretty early on the change in your demeanor. You had always been one to keep to yourself but this was different. You always seemed exhausted in a way that sleep couldn’t ever fix. Your laugh wasn’t quite the way it used to be, now forced and short, not the usual bubbly laugh it was.

Most people are able to just live and go about daily functions - eating, sleeping - it just came naturally to them. Surviving was natural to them. But it seemed like you had to put thought and effort into surviving.

Which, you were.

Slowly it became hard to motivate yourself to do the basic things to take care of yourself. You would do the bare minimum because you had to, but even that was starting to take more effort than it should. You were eating less because you just weren’t that hungry, but you still did because you knew if you didn’t you’d get sick eventually. You spent as much time in your bed as possible, but not much of it was sleeping.

Bucky picked up on these things and came up to talk to you about them, but you’d smile and shake your head.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just a little tired I guess.”

You weren’t lying, you were tired - emotionally more than physically.

Tired of more than what the day brought - tired of yourself, of your emotions. Tired of the way you felt so out of touch with yourself, out of control. Tired of how you wanted to get better but no matter what you did, it still came back. You were so tired of being exhausted all the time and there was nothing you could do about it.

You were tired of living this way.

You weren’t necessarily suicidal, it wasn’t that you didn’t want to live. You just didn’t want to live this life, not like this. You were so utterly exhausted day in and day out, every day was about getting to the end of it. Everything seemed pointless and you felt like you were watching life go by but you weren’t living it.

You were surviving. And you didn’t see much of a point to it anymore.

Your mask was cracking. And people were noticing.

Maybe it was when you were falling asleep during mission briefings, or nearly passing out in training because you had forgotten to eat. Maybe it was how no one saw you anywhere that wasn’t necessary. The team passed it off as a bad day or week, something you would get over because you were strong.

But apparently not the strong that you needed to be. You could fight off agents, assassins, you could run for miles. But you couldn’t stop your mind from telling you that life was pointless and you were a waste of space. But the team wrote it off as a bad week. But Bucky knew that this had been going on for much longer than a week.

These things rarely happen overnight.

Too many people were asking you if you were okay, and you weren’t, but you didn’t know how to say it. But you thought that if you had to choke out one more “I’m fine,” you would shatter. And you weren’t ready for everyone to see that.

You stopped coming out of your room unless it was for the bare necessities. You would come out at night for water and food, picking at it in your room so that no one would see you.

But that only made Bucky worry more.

The team, again, wrote it off as you needing some “Alone time” because maybe you just had a “bad day”. Of course they worried about you but they thought that if things were bad, or if there was something you needed help with, you would speak up. Because that’s what you did.

But Bucky was worried. He knew that when someone pushes people away, they may think being alone will help, but it only makes it worse. You may not want to talk to anyone, you may think being alone is what’s best. But it rarely is.

Being alone makes it harder to fight your demons. They can run rampant when given the chance. Being alone is the darkest and loneliest hell, and he knew that all too well.

He wasn’t going to leave you alone in that.

He came up to your room one night, wanting to check on you. He knocked on your door, being met with silence. He knocked again, calling your name, but was again met with silence. He tried the doorknob and found it unlocked, opening the door to an empty room.

Where the hell were you?

You weren’t anywhere else in the tower, so where were you?

Bucky stood there for a moment, confused before he remembered the AI system. “F.R.I.D.A.Y.Where's y/n?”

“I believe that they were heading up to the rooftop about a half-hour ago.”

Bucky’s eyes widened as he sprinted out the hallway and towards the stairs.

---

You looked out over the street, arms crossed over your shivering body. For now, you just looked down at the city below. You chuckled bitterly to yourself. There must have been thousands of people down there, thousands of lives, and you wondered how many people felt the way you did right now. So much hustle and bustle, things to do and places to be. You didn’t know a single person down there, it was just a blur of movement. Yet they all had their own personal stories and hells and blessings and shit that made them who they were.

You wondered how many of them pretended like they were fine.

You were standing closer to the edge than you should’ve been. You weren’t doing yourself any favors. You really shouldn’t be up here, but you didn’t know what else to do. Everything hurt all the time and it was just getting worse. You didn’t know whether or not you were gonna jump but here you were, teetering on the edge. Because no matter how much this hurt you still couldn’t bring yourself to fall forward.

You were scared.

You felt tears sting your eyes, angry, exhausted, everything - you couldn’t do anything right anymore, you felt no purpose, you were tired and scared all of the time. You felt so utterly done with everything, yet here you were with a way out and you were too scared of that too.

You were trapped in your body, trapped in your life, and while you didn’t want to die, you didn’t want it to hurt anymore. It wasn’t that you had nothing to live for. It wasn’t that you had nothing left. You knew you did, you knew the team was there for you. You had more support than you could ever need. But you didn’t know how to use them.

You didn’t even know how this happened. How did things get this bad? You remembered when you were happy, the person you used to be. The person everyone still seemed to think you were. Where did they go? What happened to them? And would you ever be able to be that person again?

Did it even matter? Would anyone even care or notice? They did a great job at ignoring what had been happening. Not that you wanted them to find out in the first place. It was so confusing, you wanted to scream for help, you wanted someone to just fucking notice or something. But didn’t you also answer every single “Are you okay?” with "Oh yeah I’m fine, just a little tired.”

So did you truly want them to know? Did you actually want them to notice or help?

You closed your eyes tightly, shaking your head a little to yourself. It was all so confusing, so frustrating. You didn’t know what to do. You felt completely trapped within yourself.

These things rarely happen overnight. And they never get better overnight either.

You took a breath as you looked down, toes slightly off of the ledge. One step or losing your balance would be all it would take. And then it would be over. Forever. It wouldn’t hurt anymore.

“Y/n?” you heard a calm, albeit nervous voice speak from behind you.

You felt your breath catch in your throat. As you squeezed your eyes shut. “No,” you whispered to yourself.

“Y/n, can you come down from there?”

“Why are you here?” you asked, voice strained with pain.

“Because I’m worried about you,” he said, voice sounding closer.

“I don’t want you to be worried about me! I never wanted anyone to worry about me!” you exclaimed.

“And where did not talking about what was bothering you get you?”

“No one would ever have to worry about me again. Not anymore.”

“No one on the team would ever be able to stop thinking about you,” Bucky started, walking closer to you. He spoke gently, worried he would scare you or you would suddenly jump off. “About how we should’ve worried about you. Everyone would blame themselves and ask themselves if they could’ve helped you if they had seen you were hurting.”

You heard his footsteps stop.

“This isn’t going to solve anything.”

You took a shaky breath. “What else am I supposed to do, huh?” you turned around, back facing the streets below as Bucky stood a few feet in front of you. “Pretend like this is gonna get better? Because it isn’t. I’m so sick and tired of pretending like one day everything’s gonna be okay again. It never stops hurting, it never turns off, and I can’t do it anymore!” you yelled, tears streaming down your face. You shook your head. “I know this won’t solve jack shit and it probably makes me weak, but I’m okay with that. Because I’m past the point of wanting to solve anything. I just want it to stop! Is that too much to ask?!”

“It is if your life is the price!” Bucky exclaimed. “We can’t lose you. You’re a part of this team - this family,” he said a little more calmly, trying to keep his own tears at bay. No one should go through feeling so hopeless, and you were one of the kindest people he knew.

But some of the most kind-hearted people are the meanest people to themselves.

“I’m not here to judge you or try to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. I’m not gonna tell you life is all beauty and grace because it isn’t. It’s okay to be in pain but this is not the way to fix it. I just wanna help you.”

You shook your head. “No one can help me.”

“At least let me try,” he said gently.

“You don’t understand okay? It never stops hurting,” you said, voice cracking slightly. “It always hurts and it's this ache in my chest and I feel like I’m suffocating. No one told me that life was going to hurt, no one fucking told me! They say life isn’t fair, or that life may sometimes bring you down, but they never said that existing would be torture. And I don’t want to keep living if it’s going to hurt this much.”

You saw Bucky’s face fall and you shook your head. “Please just go - You weren’t supposed to see this.”

“I’m not going anywhere. I’d rather see you at your worst than not see you at all,” he said. “You don’t have to do this yourself. I know it may seem like you do but you don’t. You never had to, and you never will have to. You have me, us, the team - we’re all here for you but we can’t if you don’t let us. But I’m not leaving you. You’ve been alone for too long already.”

You felt a new lump in your throat, feeling overwhelmed. Trapped between death and your worst nightmare. You never wanted to be vulnerable, you never wanted to hurt anyone with your own pain. But hearing Bucky’s words, seeing the panic in his eyes -

You had already hurt him. And he was right - killing yourself was only going to hurt the team more.

But it just hurt so much.

You had heard it so many times - “think about the impact you’ll have on those you love”, or how “suicide is selfish” and shit - made you feel like a horrible person. Because you did care about everyone, you cared too much. And it wasn’t that you didn’t care about hurting them with your decision - it was just that the pain of staying alive began outweighing the fear of hurting those you loved.

And it was torture.

You wanted to say everything that was on your mind - scream and cry and curse the universe, you wanted to break something, you wanted to be hugged, held, and told it would be okay - you wanted to get everything out.

You didn’t want to be alone anymore.

You’ve been alone for too long already.

You let out a broken sob, knees going weak as Bucky caught you and pulled you into his chest, away from the edge.

“I don’t want to do this anymore,” you said between sobs.

“I know you don’t, I know,” Bucky said, holding you tightly as if he feared you would disappear if he let you go.

Sticks and stones can break your bones but words can never hurt me was utter bullshit. Because the next words that came out of your mouth hurt Bucky more than anything HYDRA had done to him.

“Please just let me die. Why won’t you let me die? I just wanna die, please just let this be over.”

People didn’t realize what depression could do to a person. Someone who was full of life could end up like this. You don’t know what went wrong or when it happened, but you just felt absolutely broken inside. The kind of broken that can’t be fixed.

Bucky felt his heart shatter, tears falling down his own cheeks at how hopeless you had sounded. He had never been overly close with you, but you were always kind to everyone on the team. And the team had failed you by not noticing sooner.

“I’m gonna bring you inside okay?” Bucky said. You didn’t hear him, crying so hard that you couldn’t focus on anything else. He picked you up, carrying you back into the tower. Bucky brought you back to your room, sitting down on your bed with you. He rubbed a hand up and down your back, holding you tightly as he tried to help you calm down.

Exhaustion overtook you, your body becoming worn out from all of the crying and emotions. You never let your guard down like that in front of anyone, and shame began to overtake you.

“I - I’m sorry, you shouldn’t have seen that I’m so so sorry -”

“Don’t,” he started. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“No one was supposed to know,” you whispered.

“Why not? What’s so bad about asking for help?”

You paused for a moment, unsure exactly why. “I don’t know - I just feel really weak sometimes?” you said, more of a question to yourself. “Like I know everyone needs help and shit but I didn’t have a reason to need it. It hurts but I don’t know why, I cry when I’m not sad, I just - I’m not in control of myself and I don’t know why and if I can’t explain it to myself then how am I supposed to talk to anyone about it?”

“That makes more sense than you think. All of us on the team, we all go through shit. We see so many horrible things, we’ve been through so many things. We all have something. You have this. It’s okay if you don’t know why you feel the way you do but hurting yourself isn’t going to help anything.”

“I know what it’s like, wanting a way out,” Bucky said and you immediately knew what he was talking about. “Days that I wished Pierce or Rumlolw or whoever would just finish me rather than punish me over and over. It wasn’t that I wanted to die, I just wanted it to stop.”

You looked at him. “I know. But what I didn’t know then was that it would end. I never thought it could ever end or that it would ever end, but it did. And if I had died back then I would’ve died only knowing that pain. I wouldn’t have known that it could get better or that it would. And I’m not saying everything is perfect now because it’s not. But it’s better than it was. Okay?”

You nodded, fresh tears spilling out of your eyes. You knew the torture that Bucky went through, everyone on the team did. It had taken him a long time to speak about it on his own and move through it. But he did.

“I don’t know what to do anymore,” you said.

“Talking about it, getting it out is a great start. Talking about it never hurt anyone.” When you seemed a little apprehensive, Bucky added, “I felt alone for so long. Battling these thoughts and memories in my head. They never stopped. But when I started talking about it with someone, and they helped me work through it - I don’t know. It helped me a lot. It wasn’t just me and my thoughts anymore. I wasn’t alone.”

I wasn’t alone

“You don’t have to be alone anymore. I’m not going anywhere. Whether you like it or not I’m gonna be right here with you

These things rarely get better overnight. But maybe with someone else, they could get better a little bit quicker.

You gave a small nod. “Okay.”

---

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