#I miss characters with a lot of depth!
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i contain multitudes and can say that i am a little :( about vex and percy being teammates with benefits because i think there’s something particularly heartbreaking about the dynamic that was neither of them ever said a thing even though they both were aware of it and it took losing percy for vex to finally admit it and Even Then, she couldn’t say it to percy’s face when they got him back, percy was the one who had to make the first move (that they were both alive for at least) and he was only able to do that because he’d heard her confession, because he never would’ve thought otherwise. to be clear, i also very much enjoy the story being told, i think i just wish they’d maybe committed more significantly to This Is A Campaign-Inspired Story Rather Than A Retelling sooner in the show so that maybe there would be a bit more grounding or set-up for the storylines the narrative is focusing on (and i understand why they wouldn’t), because i think they’re doing very well with percy’s arc for example, because they started with focusing on his and keeping his beats mostly the same and that seems to be much the same case as some of his second wave of meaty character stuff has arrived. but with vex they’ve aimed for the same character beats but it doesn’t always feel as earned or really feel like much character at all; i think saundor particularly was a bit of an :/, since in the campaign it was really a catalyst for vex interrogating her role in the party and her morality and something she struggled to get over and that haunted her far beyond the walls of that tree, but in the show it hasn’t really had a clear impact on vex beyond the scope of the episode itself — syldor certainly has, but the challenge that saundor presented didn’t really have much weight beyond its moment. and obviously a large part of that’s also probably just, 7 protagonists and wanting to expand the perspectives to antagonists and give more room for side characters is a lot of things to cover. and, i say with love, perhaps a bit too ambitious for a 12 episode per season, ~22 minute runtime show if they want their characters to have the kind of depth that really makes campaign 1 shine the way it does.
#rambly thoughts sponsored by early morning haze and complex feelings about different medium storytelling#but i truly do question the choice to have such expansive parts of the story be showing the perspectives of antagonists or side characters#especially when it has a clear cost on the consistency of character depth#i think vex in particular suffers from it because she’s such an internal character that to get the most compelling of her beats right#a Lot of care has to be put into it#but as it is#a lot of the vex story beats are only really felt if you have the c1 knowledge to recognize them#obvs i think there’s likely a more obvious one upcoming#but . i miss vex who only cared about vox machina to the degree that it made her morally shitty to others#and i’m :( we won’t get to see that journey in the show. but alas! that’s what the campaign is for#this also is like. the continually questionable choice to change the trinket backstory in kith and kin having rippling consequences#to be clear this is in no way a like. i think there’s favouritism or anything i have no doubt in the casts ability to advocate for themselve#that said i do think that maybe their choices aren’t always the strongest writing wise !#my complaints or critiques tend to be ones about vex in particular because she is my blorbo of all time#but in general if not for my love of cr i don’t know if i think tlovm is a particularly strong story. it’s entertaining certainly#tlovm spoilers#tlovm#critical role#cr1 spoilers
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thinking about their friendship so hard
#camp camp#cc#David#jasper#fanart#DUDEEE nobody gets them like i do theyre so good#theyre so tragic.. they never truly got to know each other. the last time they ever seen each other they were angry with the other :(#but there’s so much regret that comes with it too. they never got to talk it out. be on good terms#they could see each other at any moment but they other doesn’t know#they call each other best friends yet we never really see them being best friends.. but maybe they get each other like no one else does#their personalities did a complete swap with each other - they understand how the other is thinking and feeling.#David hated the camp but after one good thing he loves it. viseversa with jasper#when they last saw each other they were clouded with their views and didn’t try to understand things from their lens#yet even if they didn’t - they still understood each other. if you get what I mean#theyre foils. but so is max and david and that’s what makes both relationships compelling for me. theyre so similar to each other#no wonder david is so attached to max. he sees himself in him and he sees jasper in him too#i know jaspers just a character to show how bad the camp is. but there’s so much depth to him too#he has a lot of missed potential.. i hope he’s in season 5 at least. id like to see him again#srry for the character analysis im insane#jaspvid
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thank you for being #1 lancer fan the world needs more lancer fans
Ho ho ho, of course!! Lancer is CRIMINALLY underrated I tell you, kid deserves WAY more attention than he currently gets
Glad to see another Lancer fan pop in <3!
#yk bit of a random thought but i think people see Lancer as relatively surface-level character-wise#they see all these other characters like Noelle & Spamton & Ralsei etc#characters who CLEARLY have more to them you would need to be blind to miss it#Noelle is one of the main characters as of Chapter 2 & has obvious struggles#<- notably her father likely passing away later on & her interest in Susie (not a struggle but yk)#Spamton is a secret boss & has a lot of intrigue & mystique to him#<- plus he already has connections to characters like Swatch & the Addisons#Ralsei well yk how it is with him he's literally one of THE main characters#<- & we still don't know much about him & some people likely still think he could be evil as i'm typing this#<- that's how mysterious he is#but Lancer? he rly just seems like the comedic relief yk#<- the goofy sidekick#but no! Lancer is SO MUCH MORE than that! & it sucks that most people don't see it!#Lancer hs SO MUCH potential man i rly RLY hope he has a major role to play later on#<- not just in Chapter 1#he's canonically part of the Fun Gang too ain't no way Toby Fox has this be canon#<- & completely tosses Lancer aside in later chapters#i have faith in Toby i think he can & will give Lancer justice in later chapters#just my endless tag ramble#maybe i should make this its own post and go more in-depth#yk what fuck it this is getting a deltarune tag on edit#ask#deltarune
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no major fic updates just yet guys TAKE MY WOY OC I MADE LIKE. April of last year IM PLUGGING SOME INFO ABOUT THIS GUY IN THE TAGS.
I may also redesign her soon or something. Make her more bug-like with some stuff. I can cook guys let me cook !!!
#THIS IS VAL !!!! dubbed her as a he/she er..#I have lore about this guy and his homeplanet Amore and the Lovebugs..#all that’s really important to know is that ive based the worldbuilding for Amore around svtfoe’s mewni#design wise mostly. I’ll emphasize.#in terms of the societal parts of Amore the kingdom kinda flourishes in the arts of all sorts and trade within the kingdom it goes crazay…#they were pretty closed off from the rest of the galaxy though. like their tech and stuff is pretty outdated compared to most of the other-#planets with atleast escape ships and all that fun stuff.#foreshadowing#ANYHOW lovebugs are silly guys I think of them as like weird hedonistic freaks of sorts#they have very big dionysus worshipping energy to them just to give a perspective#and of course they prioritized relationships and the different forms of love#romance actually wasn’t even the big thing that built the kingdom#it was more like a love for community and friends#which is also kinda silly because of the monarchy aspect to Amore and all that#OH ALSO these guys go absolutely crazy with fashion and makeup. gender isn’t a major thing in the kingdom in my eyes#you WILL serve cunt!! /silly#WORLDBUILDING ASIDEEE Val was the prince to the kingdom and was set to be the heir to the throne#the designs are like three different route ideas ive had for Val#the first is just a baseline design so like. pre amore‘s destruction from dominator#the second is like a good ending design of sorts to my ideal lineup for a season three for woy with val continuing to embrace the lovebugs-#history and culture even with Amore gone and a good portion of her people#and the third. is a bit hard to describe because it’s more of an au but it’s just a concept idea I had of Val teaming up with Dom#(it would be short lived like probably a few months max so dw)#and silly note i joked about the idea of val being an ex to peepers BUT I WANNA DEVELOP THAT MORE BEFORE I SHARE.#tap into that this may be cringe but i am free mindset or something slash silly TEEHEE#BUT YEAH Val’s just a silly gal in my heart and soul no matter what. ive missed her a lot i wanna work on fics with him and especially to-#develop more stuff for Amore and the Lovebugs before Dominator’s destruction of the planet#BUT YEAH i wanna Val post more. go into depth for their dynamic with the other characters and all that#I may cook some more stuff with him once I get these stargazing fics all set and whatnot SO WE’LL SEE!#also /nf but if anyone would wanna ask questions about val/amore/lovebugs ask away I’d love to answer any questions! 🥺
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gomez!master is by far the best one of nuwho and I will NOT hear otherwise. she feels so much like delgado!master in that her motivations are not exclusively world domination. even before her redemption arc in s10, she has a complex agenda of her own and sometimes that means her goals align with those of the doctor’s. i love seeing the master team up with companions it’s my absolute favorite thing. her dynamic with clara is absolutely fascinating and i find the “i want my friend back” motivation to be five million times more interesting than the “i want to Destroy You Forever” motivation or whatever it was that dhawan!master had going on
#don’t get me wrong i think dhawan did a fantastic job and his performance was excellent#the way he played the character lent him a lot of depth that the writing didn’t have#but the n*zi stuff really really puts me off.#simm was excellent too but he does wear me out#and like i said i get soooo tired of the I Want To Kill The Doctor For The Sake Of Killing The Doctor#some writers don’t get the difference between fun evil and real evil#the master should be fun evil#chibnall doesn’t get that and even rtd misses the mark with that in s3 imo#i hate to give moffat the dub here but . he did good with the master. i have to say#but we do owe most of it to michelle gomez#doctor who#gomez!master#delia.txt
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Honestly a lot of the romance pipeline joaks just aren't relatable to me at all.
Zevran > Fenris > Solas > Astarion? What is the man of mid Solas doing among those kings? He's nice like they're not, powerful like they're not, and doesn't play into the trope of being mean/"evil" and sexy. He also has so much power over Lavellan, which the others do not have over their love interests. Get him out of there. Yes they're all sad elves but that's it. Surface level reading.
Also I don't think Cullenites who are now obsessed with Astarion like Astarion for the same reasons I do. That is all I will say on the matter because I am seeing a large gathering of people outside my window and they seem to be chanting wishes of my death and gripping pitchforks.
#also fun fact the reason i deleted my old DA blog was because i was an avid cullen despiser and people hated that#so ppl going from cullen to astarion is like oouf ... why#explains why all the astarion fics are like that though#if someone fell for cullen's bullshit they will miss a lot of astarion's depth probably I MEAN WHAT AHHAHA i would never say that#ALSO i actually quite like solas and would've loved to romance him with my trevelyan#he's a great character and i love his demeanor and voice and personality and he was great friends with my trev#so adding a romantic angle to that whole angst would've been delish#solavellan in particular just gives me the ick#esp the popular fandom perception of it#anyway haha *gets shot and killed by the DA fandom*#bg3#dragon age
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It's always so funny to me when I see people say things like 'uty will never be undertale!' and list all the things they think it did wrong/inaccurately to the og game. Don't get me wrong I think it's completely valid to not enjoy it for those reasons, but at the same time it's a non-toby fox game that I never felt tried too hard to PRETEND to be a toby fox game, y'know?
There's quite a few things I think it misses the mark on when it comes to canon compliance with undertale, but I don't really mind that tbh (especially when it gave us such a fun fanon take on flowey, which is pretty damn accurate to undertale even if it doesn't make sense with the timeline and even if itd makes him a little too developed by the time frisk falls to make sense). To me, uty is a game that takes place in a world SIMILAR to undertale, by different people, that isn't quite trying to do the same thing. It doesn't have the same soul as undertale sure, but it doesn't need to. Different games serve different purposes and especially w the context of yellow being a completely free project done in fans' time as a labour of love to a game that they enjoyed, I think they did a pretty damn good job.
(again this isn't me throwing shade at people who don't like it, more an excuse for me to get some of my own thoughts out about the game lol)
#xan's thoughts#idk. yellow is a fun project that i like a lot. the bosses are fun the characters are enjoyable and they wrote a damn good flowey#not to mention the music is FANTASTIC#maybe not all the characters have tons of depth or much design variance#but there's TONS of games out there where that's the case and they're so loved#and i think that's mostly only the case bc by nature it's being directly compared with undertale#which is impossible to not do!!!! it's understandable!#but i think that also means it's easier for people to miss the things that belong to yellow and yellow alone#basically my thoughts on this are that i hope we start getting more fangames that are basically undertalelikes#give me similar art styles and ut combat but w new characters in new settings that have nothing to do w utdr#i don't mean like fell or swap or core or dream nightmare piss or whatever but like. original stuff#what's happening on the other side of the world from mt ebott? what other quirky monster and human shenanigans can people think up#it'd be so fun and cool to see. like when people invent new regions for pokemon fangames
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2024 reads / storygraph
Greta & Valdin
contemporary fiction following two gay siblings who live together in central auckland
Greta, in her 20s, getting her masters and living on a shitty academic salary, getting over an unrequited crush, and exploring a new relationship
Valdin, in his 30s, who quit science for a tourism show, whose ex (he still isn’t over) is in his orbit again when work sends him to Argentina, and has to confront what he wants for his future
navigating adulthood, OCD, a messy eccentric Māori/Russian family
#Greta & Valdin#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#oh this is great. also so weird/familiar reading about people in nz especially cities i am familiar with#I enjoyed the quirky writing style and I really loved the central sibling relationship!#The plot is just kinda a lot of hanging out with various people and then having deep conversations with them. and repeat#(but also nothing ever getting SUPER in depth)#(often about things that they’ve somehow never talked about in the decades of being a family despite the amount of yapping they do?)#but not a criticism really that's kinda the point of the book i guess lol! I think it worked for the most part#It is quite unstructured which I didn’t mind for the most part but the end was a bit random?#there’s suddenly short chapters from other character’s POVs which was a bit whiplashy#especially being in first person (by the time I felt used to the new character’s voice the 3 page chapter would be over)#Also maybe I’m dumb and missed something but what was going on with their mum’s possible affair?#like they were talking about it at the end but… i was confused if there was any conclusion drawn there. lol#there’s a review that’s like i hated this and all the product placement why do we need to know you got kapiti ice cream & went to [x] gelat#i just need you to know that we are like that about ice cream. they all have different vibes & giving that detail is just like...flavour#anyway yeah i thought it was good overall!#wlw books#mlm books
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Ohh im obssesed
#uprooted#uprooted naomi novik#solya#marek#my main playlists dedicated to them :]#idk why they cought my attention in 2018 and since that year they have had a special place in my heart. sometimes throughout my day-#i realise im obssesed with them and they're not just some random characters i like. ive dedicated a lot of time on them#i wonder how my interest in them will be when i get older. i certainly know that i will miss them if i stop thinking about them#you could say they have seen me grow. i knew them BEFORE quarantine. they were with me DURING. and AFTER#they have been through so many phases of my life. its so strange.#they changed so much too...except Marek. he still looks the same I imagined him in 2018. solya is definitely different tho#but i do think i have a different more in depth understanding of both characters#even if the words i read in 2018 are still the same now that i look back at the book. they were so many things unsaid but if u looked-#closely you could understand them. solya and marek as individual characters have so much depth...even if its not explicitly said#or maybe its just me reading between the lines too much. i wish i just knew more about them. this is getting so long-#but I got a bit nostalgic. is crazy how i was just a child and somehow even tho solya was just the total opposite of the type of characters-#i like there was something in him. something that made me look at him. and i think thats actually so in character of him#i think that in the book even if someone didnt like him. it was still hard to look away because he stood out from the rest.#there was definitely something about him that attracted people. or else how would have he gotten so far in his schemes?#I may be overanalyzing it. but i love the Falcon so much. and i do like marek a lot as a character. i find him very interesting. i know he-#did bad. terrible. things i like him as a character. not as a person.#i wish i could have seen what was going on in that damaged mind of his...#analyzing his behavior its so entertaining to me. i love making up scenarios where he is at his worst. im not gonna lie#marek suffering and then finding comfort in not comforting things is one of my favorite headcanons.#his obssesion with his mother is also a very important part of his character (ofc) and i love imagine him doing things related to that#thinking about the ways their personalities connect and make them have a very toxic bond keeps me up at night..they made each other worst#and we actually never see that in depth in the book. everything is so subtle but my crazy brain can find the signs in any part#i will stop this rant here. i feel its so long and if i made any spelling mistake i apologise to my future self (probably my self from-#tomorrow) because i know i won't be able to fix the misspelling and that will stress me SO MUCH.#future self please dont stress about it. just be happy. and enjoy thinking about these insane characters
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tsunade's arc
When we're introduced to Tsunade, she's at rock bottom. She's a medical ninja who's afraid of blood. She's broke and constantly on the run from loan sharks. She hasn't been back to the village in years—in fact, she's completely uninvolved with the shinobi world. She's rude and she engages in self-destructive behavior by gambling and drinking all the time. It's easy to dismiss her, like Naruto does, as a shallow, unlikeable old woman.
But then we learn that all this is because she's running from her past. Her brother and partner are both dead, and the reason she's so callous towards Naruto in particular is because he reminds her of them to the point that's it's painful.
(chapter 159)
Tsunade's most prized possession is her necklace: in particular, it's the necklace that's brought bad luck to the only other people who have worn it, her brother and her partner.
(chapter 160) (He died the literal day after she gave it to him? Jesus Christ.)
Obviously, the necklace represents the dream to be Hokage—to love and protect the village. She first gave it to Nawaki as an acknowledgement of his dream, and to prove her belief in him. She reclaimed the necklace after he died, then met Dan sometime afterward.
(chapter 160)
Nawaki's death was initially what drove her to, if not become a medical ninja, then push for greater medical access. She knew what loss felt like and wanted to prevent anyone else from experiencing that tragedy. And she wanted Nawaki's death to mean something; even if she couldn't be Hokage, she could bring a small piece of his dream to fruition by protecting the people of Konoha via healing.
Though the Hokage disagreed with her proposal, she met Dan, another person who knew the loss of a younger sibling and agreed with her ideals. He, like Nawaki, hoped to protect the village, and he envisioned a brighter future without the heavy spectre of violent, premature death.
(chapter 160)
Tsunade saw herself in Dan because of their similar trauma and the desire they both had to improve the village. But more importantly, she saw Nawaki in Dan—his kindness, his drive, his optimism. Her belief in Dan was so strong that she, once again, gave away her necklace, entrusting him with the protection of the village and its future...
... but, once again, to tragic results.
This was the moment she truly lost everything. Her loved ones, both current and the echoes of the one long gone. Her hope for a brighter future. Her belief in the village. And, most importantly, her belief in herself. If even she, the greatest medical ninja alive, couldn't save the one she loved most, then what was the point anymore? Significant change was impossible. She was destined to fail from the start.
And that's what led her to her situation at the beginning of the arc. She was consumed by grief, blaming herself and running away, burying Nawaki and Dan's (and her!) dreams along with their memory.
Then Naruto comes along and inspires her with his endless determination, as he does.
(chapter 163)
(chapter 166) (what a cool panel)
(chapter 167) (it's always the left hand!)
(chapter 167)
She sees history replay: another young man risks his life for the title "Hokage," but this time he manages two impossible achievements. Not only does he block the fatal attack, he counterattacks with the justsu she bet he couldn't master. Naruto lives, and it's like Nawaki and Dan live on through him. By saving him, she is saving them. And thus, a third impossible thing happens. Tsunade feels hope for the first time in years.
(chapter 168)
Naruto proves that the ideal Hokage that Nawaki and Dan wanted to achieve—the Hokage that protects and improves the village—is possible. Tsunade entrusts her necklace to him with the belief that he can fulfill that role, having defied all the cards stacked against him through sheer determination.
(chapter 169)
But Nawaki and Dan weren't the only ones who imagined a better future for the village. Tsunade had her own dreams once: a world where children don't have to pointlessly die. When Tsunade saves Naruto's life, first with medical jutsu and then by blocking Orochimaru with her own body, she remembers her aspirations and regains the confidence that she can make a difference. She loses her fear of blood along with her self-blame and defeatism. And thus, Konoha's fifth Hokage is born.
(chapter 169)
Bonus:
Tsunade also has the superior thematic forehead-related gesture of affection
#naruto reread#tsunade#naruto#lanecdotes#retrospectively this is all kind of obvious (as in there are panels that literally spell it out)#but I missed a lot of it when I first watched the show so I wanted to get all of my thoughts together into a coherent narrative#anyway my theory on why tsunade is like. the only female character to have more depth than a kiddie pool#is because of her huge breasts#that's where all the misogyny is concentrated#by providing the obligatory fanservice she's allowed to have a personality. as a treat.
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These deleted scenes from SAB just prove why we need two shows now (probably before now but now especially). There is so much more they could show if each set of characters got room to breathe and expand.
#shadow and bone#shadow and bone season 2#sab s2#six of crows#both deleted scenes showed a lot of depth for the characters and i get why they were cut for the overall sake of time#but these are the character dynamics that people would’ve killed to see#jesper and wylan being together?#inej and jesper saying goodbye?#so much depth we unfortunately miss out on because betflix sucks
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I understand nearly everyone hates Rebecca (which is fair) but I wish she had a more solid role and an actual plotline. I feel like up until this point she's just been there as a mostly peripheral character for the Detective to have whatever feelings about and occasionally have repetitive, stilted convos with. Anytime the game asks how the Detective feels about something Rebecca does I just sigh bc, whether it's positive or negative, it just doesn't feel like it really matters to the story. I can't even hate her tbh, like she has the same value as, say, the Captain or Unit Alpha to me…. IDK maybe this is dumb or maybe she'll actually be firmly involved in the other books but, yeah..
i totally agree !!! it's very easy to hate rebecca, but that's bc what m*shka has given us in canon doesn't really do much for me and plenty of others – like we know she wasn't the best mom. we know she wants to atone for her mistakes. but why does everything she says feel so empty – and not in the "empty promises" kind of way.
it just reads so weird because she'll take a haggard breath or whatever and get upset about rook and then be a bit aloof with mc and then. we're supposed to what? pick a choice that repairs or damages the mc's relationship with her further? she's very one-note and two dimensional to me unfortunately. and like you said, i think that she doesn't matter to the story – not that she actually doesn't, it just doesn't feel like she has as much weight on the story as we're told – but she could and that's a huge opportunity missed
#like ... i would like rebecca or want to make oc's that repair their relationship with her if it felt worth it#and if she was a character with more depth than what we've seen#i don't doubt that it is there yk it's just not shown in canon that much imo#crying and getting shaken up over rook every 2 seconds isn't depth#i would much rather her be a more stoic character that already believes she *can't* repair her relationship with mc#so she doesn't even try until the ro finally says something to her later on maybe#wouldn't it also be soooo juicy if mc were to learn rook's backstory from others and rebecca had no idea mc knew?#anyway! there's lots of possibilities with rebecca and i feel so much of her is just. missed opportunity#asks#twc book 3#twc book 3 spoilers#twc spoilers
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OH MY GOD I COMPLETELY FORGOT MIU EXISTED. You're right she is most likely to roll her eyes out of the V3 cast. And even then I'm like squinting to make it happen. Like I said, I don't really think the V3 cast is that calloused - maybe if they were having a bad day? But honestly they're pretty nice people. Kirumi would have to have a very stressful day of being overworked to do so I feel, and like I said, even then I feel she'd be too polite. Tbh I would love to see Maki cheering up a child now though.... we know how much she cares for kids & how much they supposedly love her so I think more content with her cheering some up would be fun to see! I can't believe I totally forgot Miu existed for a second there though. Wow
HAUGHDSJHGJSDKFKSF
To be fair to you I literally sat there and ran through all the characters in death order to try and remember them all. I have to do that every single time or I always end up forgetting somebody (and its usually Tsumugi even though she's one of my favourite characters... girl is too plain for her own good)
I feel like even though Maki says she doesn't like kids she obviously really cares about everyone in her orphanage. Its kind of unfortunate that we don't see a lot of fanworks explore her relationship with kids/the orphanage but I kind of this maki is a bit underrated as a character
#''maki is underrated'' feels like a weird take because she is one of the most popular girls#if not THE most popular girl#but i still feel like I dont see a lot of stuff going into her character in depth...#I feel like its standard in fandoms for like 1-3 characters to get an insane amount of exploration#and then the rest usually have their own subsets of people who love them in that way#to me it feels like Maki just barely missed the mark to be uber popular#its a shame. shes so cool#pluto answers#wow that was unrelated sorry ghdjskfsd
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You know who's underrated? Reed. Clay's brother who was their Bigwings.
Everytime I reread the first arc im surprised he has an actually defined characters unlike Clay's other siblings. He's only in like one chapter and a prolouge but Sutherland was able to make him a character with depth, which is just really impressive. Reed has a small arc where he gets over his insecurity of being his family's bigwings when it should of been Clay and it so sweet how his siblings comfort him.
In short Reed deserves more discussion and attention. ESPECIALLY explorations between him and Clay.
#wings of fire#wof#clay#mudwings#tbh im surprised there isnt more fandom content between Clay and any of his mudwing siblings.#theres a lot potential there from angst he missed out on his famiky and culture to just sweet bonding moments#everyone focuses on Sora's poor handle on her tramau or Umber being gay#which is understandable bc there more prominent characters#but Reed also deserves some attention#id argue theres more to him than Umbre whos a generic nice guy which no real explored conflict of depth#i love Umbre though
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i’m really enjoying my dwarf commoner playthrough
#fray.txt#it took me roughly 4 days to finish modding it because i go over the top#and several hours troubleshooting issues as i find them#i am having a lot of fun#troubleshooting is satisfying and the dwarf commoner origin was fun#i missed origins so much#the companions are so wonderful#i forgot how much depth these characters had#i haven’t played this since i was 19#it’s good to be home
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genuine question: how do i know if my oc is actually good or not?
or, maybe, 'well-developed and well-designed' rather than 'good'?
esp without feedback from others, lol, because it's hard enough putting snippets out there for funsies, im hesitant to put more out there if i'm just gonna be bringing a shitty stick figure glued to a popsicle stick to show and tell while everyone else is bringing like....meticulously crafted ball-joint dolls and lovingly made amigurumi and so on (/end crappy metaphor)
#everyone's ocs and tavs and such are lovely. it's kinda fun watching yall play#i wanna play too :(((#but not if my guy sucks#but i dont know if he actually sucks or if there's something there and im right to love him the way i do#idk man#im the worst at self-evaluation with this stuff#the default is to assume im failing at what i set out to do#(well my default is to assume I Suck at Everything but that mindset isnt helpful right?#so what am i setting out to do with this? and am i hitting it? or am i getting there? or am i failing? is probably more useful. idk)#(tho maybe 'am i missing the mark and how can i get there' is even more useful than 'am i failing?' but this isnt the point)#people have told me in the past that no. he doesnt suck. they liked reading about him#but if that were actually true then more people would like him. obviously.#but its actually a general question because if i can ever get out of my head and into my creative endeavors....#i'll need to create and design a lot of characters right? like.... i wanna do comics#i want to make my villain knitting circle dating sim#and if i cant even be sure the little guy i made for shits and giggles is any good#how can i expect to do something more in-depth???#i know the general answer is practice. but then if it turns out i am bad at Characters....#then i'll just practice the bad things#feedback is the answer but then that swings back around to i dont wanna just shove garbage in people's faces because thatd be cruel#so i dont know what to do. and all the while i'm just not doing anything and it's not productive and i'm aware#i know part of it is also 'feel the fear. show him off anyway' but i am!!!!!!#nobody is biting!!! and its because they hate hiiiiimmmmm/whiny baby mode#i mean. yall might see more of him bc i might actually write some things but god. nobody will probably bite with those either#ughh....#to the void with love
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