#I might be a lil' biased on this one

[moeblob]

I’d just like to say thank you for drawing Gavin and Chris being friends. Definitely an underrated pair and I’m so happy that art of them exists. Makes my day to see them honestly.

Also, please make more because this fandom definitely needs it 💕

OH HELL YEAH that's some of my favorite stuff to draw for DBH tbh! There is something so charming about unhinged coworker dynamics... I say this as someone who has been the unhinged coworker and someone who has heard unhinged coworkers.

Thank you so much though! I'm glad you've enjoyed what I have so far! I will say that while I didn't have the energy to draw it yesterday for Halloween, the idea that I had was them just alternating who got to wear the Ghostface mask. (I have never seen any of the Scream movies but I do know that there's not a Singular Ghostface, but multiple people)

Like someone would walk past Gavin's desk and he's just on his phone not looking up while Chris is making a work call - wearing the mask. Then five minutes later Chris tosses it over saying he needs some air and Gavin wears it. But the fact it was Halloween nobody really clocks the swap at first just "wow I am REALLY tired I thought it was the other one wearing it. I must really need coffee" and then half an hour passes and they've swapped who's wearing it again.

[23sanguinity]

It’s literally the best movie I’ve ever seen what the fuck do you mean only 71.8 mill

[masked-puppetmaster]

Maybe I just don’t know enough about welcome home I just found it last night but Wally doesn’t necessarily strike me as evil

[saintslewis]

❝ 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐒 | 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒 ❞

pairing: sir lewis hamilton x fem!journalist reader

summary: a lil joke thing i wanted to write because homeboy is bringing home the big bucks 🤭

warnings: just read 🫵🏽 this is a crack fic lol

saint’s team radio 🎀: don’t take this all too seriously 😭 hope y’all enjoy plus who know i’ll actually make it into a thing 🧍🏽‍♀️

tags: @alika-4466 @purplelewlew @exotic-iris13 @arshiyuh @mauvecherie-writes @yeea-nah @youre-sooooo-funny @louvrepool @queenshikongo3 @cherry2stems @httpsserene @motheroffae

-

Being an independent journalist in this sport wasn’t easy at all but only within the parameters of any paddock around the world as most journalists rarely agreed with you, being neutral about anything in f1 wasn’t your thing.

Speaking your mind as the race went on was what set you apart from the rest, along with your humour and your honesty towards drivers and team principals. Not to mention you were extremely biased, keeping your liking to three to five drivers but only one occupied your mind every time you think about him.

I think you know who I’m talking about.

Your support for Lewis goes back to 2015, discovering the sport and immediately wanting to put your journalism skills to the test, aiming for the f1 paddock to at least catch a glimpse of the most talked about driver. Quickly building up a blog and several other social media accounts, you got to telling the world your thoughts and feelings for every race and your supporters rooted for you to achieve your goal.

Having the opportunity to attend thee race in 2020 as a guest of F1, you arrived at the Turkish Grand Prix with your head held high and a dress so gorgeous that it sparked rumours between you and the driver you were writing about. Not to mention the hug he gave you when you first met in the Mercedes garage, praising and thanking you for the support over the years. He’s been watching you and your work. That made your heart so warm.

Then he won his 7th world championship, breaking all records and that day, he deemed you his lucky charm.

And since then, it’s been a work wife-work husband friendship between you two. Fans constantly shipping you too, the clips of your shared interviews at the media pen of the intense eye contact and even off-track sightings once in a while such as a quick lunch.

yourusername • 13 mins ago

The atmosphere in Australia was unlike anything you’ve ever seen in your career, the paddock was practically painted red, Ferrari red to be specific. Everyone eager for Lewis to arrive as his first season as a driver for the legendary team.

Deciding to subtly support him and his new team, you rocked maroon everything, not yet ready to fully embrace the extreme bright red. It just might be your new favourite colour, from your hair right down to the tips of your high heeled boots.

Whilst setting your camera equipment up (gracefully given to you by Ferrari themselves), you couldn’t help but reminisce back to the year before of when he told you he was leaving Mercedes, a single facetime call in the nighttime.

“You made me pause the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, this better be good.” You said, placing the popcorn bowl down on your coffee table. Giving him squinted eyes, he just smiled at you.

“Are you alone right now?” He asked and that set aback for a bit. “You tryna do something funny, Lewis? Because you’re in Monaco right now and I’m at my house.” You raised your eyebrow at him, hiding how nervous you were to even suggest that to him but thankfully, he took it as a joke.

“No no, I’ve got some big news and I wanted to tell you before it gets out.” He replied, seeing how you stood up and placed your phone on your kitchen counter to prepare for this. “Okay, I’m ready. What’s up?” You clasped your hands together, not prepared to hear what came out of his mouth next.

“I’m moving to Ferrari next year.”

“You’re lying.” And all he did was smile as he saw your face drop at this news. He shook his head and that woke you to run around your apartment screaming. Running back to your phone, he was still there but just laughing his lungs out.

“Give me the details right now or else I’ll fly there. I’m not playing, Lew.”

A small smile was plastered on your face as you racked through the memories of that night and till that day, you still couldn’t believe it even though it was right in front of you. The media pen became louder and louder as you continued to mic yourself up along with connecting the mic to the camera and you immediately knew who caused the stir.

He already had such an aura surrounding him so much so that you could feel him whenever he entered the room. You were aware he arrived earlier and most likely changed but seeing the official team shirt on him was odd but fitting.

Lewis had a simple routine whenever he got to the media pen: everyone else then you because his time with you could be lengthened and he was so damn grateful that it was a Thursday because it meant even more time just walking around the paddock pretending it’s an interview when really, you guys were just spending time together.

After all the drivers had their interviews with you, laughing as they walked away because of some joke you told or happy that you asked different questions than everyone else. The man of the hour strolled over to your section with a look in his eye that gave you a shiver down your spine.

“Do not give me that look, Lewis. It’s weird seeing you in that shirt.” You said as he leaned against the barricade, maintaining eye contact with you. “I’m just taking in the red on you, it’s your colour.” He smirked at the reaction from you, the slight shock from the tone of his voice.

There was always a tad bit of tension between the two of you, feeling that twinge of a spark whenever he merely touched you. As you worked with over the years, you wanted your crush on him to diminish because that would just be unprofessional but he did not seem to care. At all. Often being spotted at various places together that he claimed were just two friends hanging out but just one look from him could have you in the clouds of days.

“Uh..huh. Wanna get these questions done or you wanna keep staring?” You asked with sass, watching him tilt his head a little and maintaining eye contact. “We can go right ahead, Y/n.” Lewis replied and you knew this was going to be a long interview.

Several questions later with a bunch of tension that you were sure the viewers would catch, you discreetly turned the camera to ask one of your infamous unserious questions that you did with every driver and you were sure this one were to get a laugh out of Lewis.

Holding the little card in front of you, you grinned with your left eye closing slightly more than the other. “It’s one of my favourite parts of any interview, unserious question time.” You said. “How unserious are we speaking here?” He asked with the slightest grin on his face just admiring you do your job.

“Only if you promise to answer it.” You said, holding out your manicured pinkie finger and Lewis hooked his with yours, solidifying the promise. “Okay okay, the whole world was shocked on how much Ferrari wanted you so much so that they literally doubled your salary.” You started.

“It’s now sitting at a hundred million a year. My question to you is who you gonna share it with and will it be me?”

“If you’re being serious, then it can be you.” He smiled and in that moment, your stomach dropped.

“Carl Davidson, I’m not playing around. Are you being for real?” You asked, lowering your voice so that no one could hear a thing.

He leaned in a bit more to whisper his next answer. “As real as you meeting me later on for dinner.” Lewis faced you then winked, walking away with your face still in shock. After standing there for what felt like forever, you felt your phone vibrate with a text from the man himself.

lew <3

you look gorgeous in red btw

-

yourusername

liked by theestallion, f1wags and 43,747 others

yourusername “anything you want, princess” — lewis hamilton.

view comments

user give me your game card

user you’re eating the red wig DOWN

spinzbeatsinc oh for him to buy me a g wagon

yourusername you already have one???

user you gold digging bitch

user no ways 😭

user not you using him for his money

user think about it, what is he gonna do with so much??

fan she got the chance and she took it, i gotta respect it

user i hope this is a hard launch because i’ve been shipping these two for YEARS

user me too!!

lewishamilton just say the word 🫡

yourusername 🤭🤭🤭🤭

saint’s team radio (again) 🎀: hope you all enjoyed! again, this is like a crack fic lol. there’s so many stories that’ll be released soon i’m excited 🥹 okay bye!

[lovingksuki]

✰ SECRET ADMIRER pt.2

— highschoolers bakugo x fem!reader

synopsis: an anonymous love letter appears in your locker on valentine's day. surprised, you and your best friend start an investigation to uncover who was that person observing you from afar. meanwhile, a flushed bakugo tries to ruin your plans on the undercover alongside his shitty-haired buddy

cw: sfw; mostly fluff; lil angst; very insecure bakugo; romantic comedy; puberty; silly jokes; little swearing.

an: guyyyyss it's hereeee. i hope you enjoy since i had many people asking for me to continue with this. i hope it is as good as the first part that btw you can read here

wc: 1,3k

the two went on a mission walking around the school and very non-suspiciously investigating whose hand that might be.

"i'm telling you! there's sato, iida and..." counted.

"are they even suspects!?" you mocked. "we have to be coherent about it. i don't even have a major relationship with them..."

"how could you possibly know what goes on inside other's head? i think you're being biased about it."

"what do you mean?"

"i know you want it to be one of the hottest in our class!" smiled diabolically.

"i have no idea what you're talking about." you sweated.

"maybe we should call that double colored guy and just ask a few questions..."

"no way... what are you insinuating?" you almost screamed truly shocked.

"that you have a slight cru-"

"I don't have a crush."

"admit it already."

"I'm not admitting anything. quit pestering."

"you're no fun at all. so... are we talking to Todoroki any soon?"

"no."

"psst, isn't that sero coming this way?" mina whispered looking ahead of the corridor.

the duo telepathically agreed to their next move and mina quickly went in action.

"hey, if isn't our fave tape boy! can I have a high-five?" the pink cheered lifting her hand.

the jet-black haired guy smiled playfully slapping hands with her. watching everything, you caught that glimpse of time needed to take conclusions on the survey.

"what are you two up to? feeling extra energetic today..." sero stated.

absorbed in your own thoughts, you simply couldn't answer any of the questions made, so pinky said in advance: "we're just too excited for the... the-"

"for what?"

"the new movie...! yeah! that one with the clowns. everyone is so hyped to watch it!" mina came up with some excuse.

"oh, so you like 'bloody nightmare' series too? man, me and denki are gathering people to go watch with us." he cheered.

you and mina eyed each other nervously while sero kept rambling about horror films. pinky swiftly poked your side sending the 'make him shut up' signal and you quickly catch the message saying:

"y-yeah! it would be super cool, but we need to... to... go to the 1b room! to dis- discuss the next match-"

"we're discussing the teams for the next training match!" mina rapidly came with an excuse ready to push you up the corridor. "see ya!"

"but guys... their class is towards the other side." sero warned confusedly.

"r-right! it's been months, but we still get lost... hehe!" mina sweated. she spotted a purple voluminous hair meters away. "shinso! wait up!"

and you runned away. sero chuckled observing the girls as another duo approached.

"'sup pal?" kirishima greeted. "it's a important matter so, could you share what are the girls planning? we have business with them."

"it's no use, we're gonna lose sight of them." said the blonde ready to walk away, but his buddy was fast to grab his shirt stopping his tracks.

"be reasonable, it's creepy to chase them around the school." eijiro whispered.

"what are you two up to?" sero crossed arms curious about the situation.

"nothing particularly important. girly borrowed something from bakugo." his heart he thought slightly laughing. "did them say anything about where they're heading?" asked.

"mina said they have something to do with class 1b, and i think they left with shinso." sero explained.

"not that eraserhead wannabe..." katsuki gritted teeth.

"well, no time to lose then! thanks dude." kirishima dragged his best friend away.

when the two males finally found the duo they were shocked to see you holding shinso's hand while walking

kirishima panicked turning to the blonde who watched that scene petrified. it was the second time eijiro saw that expression on his face, the first was when they watched all might last fight. that expression that indicates he started malfunctioning, his thoughts are running wild, and he is about to break.

when he finally inhaled, kirishima's heart skipped a beat thinking bakugo would explode at any moment. he prepared himself to restrain his friend from murdering somebody or start yelling like a psycho, but bakugo just hollowed his lungs right after.

watching deadpanned as you walked away giggling.

that behavior... it was truly concerning coming from him.

"are you totally sure?" mina whispered excited.

"it's a great probability, didn't you see that monstrosity of a hand!?" you whisper-exclaimed. "his grip almost crushed mine!"

"okay, but let's don't get ahead of ourselves, there's other boys to analyze." mina said carefully.

"right, but he's a suspect! and did you notice how he didn't hesitate or felt uneasy to hold my hand?"

"i'm not jumping to conclusions but he seemed too chill! it's almost unnatural coming from a person who wrote a love letter." mina spoke wisely.

"you're right." you pouted.

"what am i suspect about? love letter!?"

"aaaaaack! for fucks sake!" you and mina jolted. "y-you heard us?" you asked shyly.

"were you eavesdropping!?" mina confronted.

the boy leaned in the doorframe crossing his arms unphazed by the pink's attitude. "you're not even whispering... some of 1b even heard about how i have big ass hands and shit." he chuckled.

you looked over shinso's shoulder only to encounter monoma, kendo, shiozaki and komori confusedly observing at some distance. "h-hey guys..." and kendo smiled amused.

"he caught us, mina. what do we do?" you said fidgety.

"there's no other way now that he knows our secret. we must kill you." mina stated creepily serious to shinso, making him falter.

"ha. you almost got me there." he laughed mindlessly. after a couple of seconds staring at each other he came to realization. " you're joking,,, right?"

_

"why did you have to scare him like that? what if he go out telling others?"

"it's quite the opposite. he won't tell anyone if he believes it's confidential information. you can question my methods but not my results!" the pink girl explained confidently.

walking down the corridor in search for another male friend. now that the lunchtime was coming to an end the school was less fuzzy, and the groups concentrated in their usual places.

"uh... mina... you're not actually dangerous, are you?" you blurted.

she looked at you puzzled, as if that question was more complicated than it actually seemed. "why do you ask?"

"it's just because, you're my best friend, and if it were for me to have a psycho so close to me i would want to know..." you reasoned.

"don't be ridiculous!" she laughed. "but like you said, we're best friends, that does mean i would probably hide a body for you."

"wait. what the-"

_

"kirishima it's been thirty minutes." the blonde stated impatiently.

the boys were sitting casually at their class waiting for the others to come grab their keys to the closets. p.e was the next hour.

"just be patient dude, when she arrives, you casually get up and go talk to her. do you remember the three steps?" the red haired pointed.

"don't scream, don't curse and look at her in the eye." bakugo grumbled a little skeptical.

when they heard high pitched voices and footsteps approaching the blonde jolted in his seat.

"there they are." kirishima whispered. "good luck soldier"

katsuki got up with a sigh, heart beating fast, he didn't even notice his feet leading him directly to you and almost fainted when you looked at him with those doe eyes.

"h-hey."

"hey!" you greeted rummaging your backpack.

"i was... i recalled that time last week you shared your notes and... i"

"you came to say thanks? it's alrighty! just gimme a shoutout whenever you need!" you smiled

his ears reddened. "y-yeah. but i was trying to ask if ya wanna grab milkshakes sometimes, my treat for the notes." katsuki managed to spill

"oh! i didn't expect that" you giggled thinking that was a cute way to invite someone to hang out. "sure. i provide the notes, you provide the milkshakes." you extended your hand "deal?"

he smirked satisfied shaking you hand.

"deal."

[quantum1mmortality]

Guess who's suffering from writers block!!! No but fr I wanna write SO BAD but I just can't 😭😭 so take some twst pp hcs until I decide to work on commissions again

Not proofread idc shank me

♧CW!!! Fem reader! twst dick hcs duh, every NRC student EXCLUDING ortho, might have some other hcs too

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Riddle:

Its... cute? Idk how to explain it

He is VERY sensitive

5.5 inches

Slight curve downward

The tip is a really deep red

Cum is watery, tastes like rosewater(this is a fantasy world i can make cum taste like anything i want)

Balls aren't all that heavy, very soft and squishy tho

Likes rimming. No further comments

Trey:

EEK MY BOY

I'm gonna try not to be biased

Hes BIG tho

I know you've seen him. Let's be honest, we all know he's PACKING

So I'm gonna say a solid 7-8 inches with a nice amount of girth

No curve, but very veiny

Heavy balls. Like, HEAVY. Bros got a whole bakery in there

Soft pink tip

Cum is the normal consistency, he takes care of himself

If you're sucking him off he'll change the flavor of his cock and his cum to whatever you want (thank god for doodle suit)

Cater:

Easy 7 inches

Not too sensitive, it takes a while for him to cum

His cum is pretty thick, its all the spicy ramen he eats

Curve upward, huge thick vein going from his balls to the tip

Cum tastes salty, but not overwhelming

Will have his clones fuck you silly

Deuce:

Another small boy

I'll say 6 inches, no curve

Hes sensitive too, but not as much as riddle

He really like getting his balls sucked more than his cock itself

Cum is watery too, but it tastes good

Like sweet in a way

Tip is a light blue dont ask why

Ace:

Another small boy 😭

He is CLUELESS

Poor man is a one pump chump

5.6 inches, curve to the left

SENSETIVE. pussy got this boy on his knees

Balls squishy, balls soft?

Yes to both

His rip is red, like a blush red

Azul:

A good 6ish inches with a curve downward

Not as sensitive as you may think

I think it would be funny if the bottom of his cock had like little suckers or some shit

Tip is dark purple and he has some veins, not many tho

Heavy balls, no squish :(

Cum is thick and black bc octopus

Tastes like what watered down hand sanitizer smells like

Jade:

😨

Its slimy.

No further comment on that

No but its like wet, a lot

So is floyds but we aren't there yet

Its like lube 🥺

Okay but he's LONG

8.5 AT LEAST

He also enjoys rimming

Tip is dark cyan

Cum is slimy too

Add some borax water and sell it on etsy

Floyd:

Basically the same as Jade

Hes smaller tho

Hes 6 inches but has SO much girth

His cum is more watery than slimy and the tip is a light blue

Lots of veins too

Kalim:

6 inches

So sensitive

He begs.

Loves blow jobs but would NEVER ask for them

Heavy soft balls

A dark brown tip and there's lil red swirlies

Cum is thick

Tastes like coconut toothpaste

Jamil:

mmmmmmmmMMMMMMM

BIG

So big

Destroy me PLEASE

7.8 inches and a big curve upwards

Likes fingers in his ass, just like Kanye west

Doesn't like blow jobs he cums too quick :(

Gets overstimulated easily and when he does hes highly submissive

Cum a lil thick (its all the curry he eats)

Its yummy tho

Tastes salty and a lil sweet

Like a pretzel

Tip is a redish-brownish

Vil:

Hes a very odd case

Hes big, dont get me wrong

But mans does NOT have sex 😭

He complains it ruins his makeup

7.4 inches with a few veins

Oh yeah hes unclipped too idk why but he is

Tip is a pinky purple color

Balls got some weight, they're not sensitive

Rook:

Hes an even weirder case

Hes very big but almost NEVER penetrates you

Hed much rather be in between your legs for hours on end

Making you cum on his face gives him so much pleasure

He doesn't touch himself either

When he's eating you out he has one hand thrusting fingers into your pussy, the other hand thrusting fingers into your ass(hes an ass man I know he is) while he sucks on your clit the whole time

He cums on the sheets whenever you do bc he knows how good you feel

Hes 8.5 inches with a curve down, large vein going upward

A creme colored tip

Cum normal consistency, you don't know what it tastes like because he never let's you suck him off :(

Epel:

Small boy

Whimpers

A lot

Hes 6 inches with a curve to the left

Light purple tip bc I said so

Light balls, but no squish :(

Cum is watery and tastes like lavender oil

Idia:

Oh god

Contrary to popular belief he has a lot of stamina

He doesn't have ANY experience tho

Played a lot of hentai games but thats the extent of his experience

I think it would be really funny if instead of whispering dirty talk or praise during sex he tells you the fnaf lore

Like he'll be blowing your back out and he'll just be like "so the crying child was actually william aftons son-" and then he cums

After hes done and doing aftercare he'll quiz you on the fnaf lore

If you get any of the questions wrong he'll fuck you until you can't walk as a punishment

If you get them all right he'll eat you out for hours until you also can't walk

Win win honestly

8 inches

TIP IS BLUUUEEEEEE

Cum is thick and salty, he doesn't take care of himself

Heavy, HEAVY balls. Very sensitive

He loves blow jobs too

Leona:

8.8 inches, but if we're being real to how ACTUAL lion anatomy is hes closer to 3 inches but yall aren't ready for that convo

Not sensitive at all, it takes so long for him to cum

But when he does hes so sweet, whispering praise after praise to you and lots of kisses

Cum is normal consistency, a lil on the thicker end

Its a bit bitter with a sweet aftertaste

Hes also unclipped and I will not elaborate

Idk if lions have them but if they do then he has a knot, not as big as jacks tho

Heavy balls, they're sensitive

Brown tip, like, dark brown tip

Ruggie:

7ish inches with a curve down

Also likes eating you out

Doesn't like having his balls touched

They're cute and squishy tho

Cum is also thick and doesn't taste like anything

Tip is a light brown and has a vein going through it

Jack:

8 inches.

Has a huge knot. Physically cannot pull out when it comes to it

Cum tastes like strawberries

Doesn't let you suck him off often bc he doesn't wanna knot in your mouth

Also gets pleasure from eating you out

Tip is grey and sensitive

Malleus:

Hes also like rook in the way he'd eat you out for hours if you'd let him

But he does penetrate you

Our big dragon boy loves the feeling of being inside your tight cunt

Will probably cum if you praise him

He has 2.

One on top one on the bottom

The one on top is longer, 9 inches while the one on the bottom is 7ish, the bottom one is a lot thicker tho

He'll be so slow easing them in and almost never goes fast when it comes to sex

He sees it as love making

They both have a black tip and the cum is normal consistency, tastes like... eggs? Hardboiled don't ask

Oh yeah his cum glows in the dark

Lilia:

Idc what you guys say this man is SO EXPERIENCED

He knows how to have sex properly and can make you cum in seconds if he feels like it

7 inches, his dick is where all his height went

Because he's so experienced he doesn't cum easily

PINK TIP PINK TIP

His cum is normal consistency, a little watery maybe

Tastes like citrus

Silver:

Loves when you ride him

Likes missionary too tho

7 inches too

His tip is grey

Very sensitive and gets overstimulated easily

Hes also just very submissive in general

Cum is watery and tastes like what a new car smells like

Sebek:

LOUD

SO LOUD

CANT TAKE THIS BITCH ANYWHERE

Cries during sex

Loves when you pull his hair

Does he have horns? If he does they're very sensitive

Cums if you touch them

Hes a crocodile right

Nah he has horns

8 inches no other comments

GREEN TIP

Cum is thick and bitter

We love him tho

Balls squishy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/n: im so fuckibg tired god help me

[coridallasmultipass]

I ran out of tags rambling about this, so I'm just gonna do my calculations here:

So there's Dirk (who is 100% Essence of Dirk, same as Bro), who makes Lil Hal at age 13: at this point, Hal is "guaranteed to be 96% indistinguishable." We'll lessen that amount for each year they grow separately until Dirk is 16 at the time of prototyping (and I'm not going to take into account how Lil Hal has no physical DNA in common with Dirk, because I don't have information on how that worked out). I'm calculating Hal as continuously diverging from Dirk to become his own person because he's quantifiable like that, on account of being made of code that constantly learns and grows.

So, 13 is 81.25% of 16, and for the guaranteed amount, 96% of 81.25% is 78%. This means that, at the time of prototyping, Lil Hal is 78% Dirk.

For the prototyping, let's call it an even 50/50% between Lil Hal and Equius, ignoring the kernel itself altogether. Half of 78% is then 39%: ARquius is 39% Dirk.

Then, for Lil Cal, I'll be extra generous and call it an even 3-way split between ARquius, Caliborn, and Gamzee; bringing that percentage down to 13% of Dirk being inside Lil Cal, at most.

And I don't think 13% is enough to qualify BroCal as self-cest. Stridercest, yes, but not self-cest.

For reference, just looking at a few sites, siblings can share from 38-60% of DNA, and while I know I'm not going off DNA, the 13% wouldn't even put Bro and Lil Cal into the sibling range, let alone the self; it'd be closer to that of a cousin in terms of how much Essence of Dirk is shared between them, which really isn't a lot.

I'd say self-cest should probably contain at least 50% of the self in order to qualify, just to throw out a generously low figure. Ignoring my ramblings in the tags (I wrote the tags before all this), this would put Bro/Dirk and Bro/Hal (depending on how many years since age 13 - around age 26 would be where Hal borders 50% divergence from Dirk) as self-cest; but Bro/ARquius or Bro/Lil Cal wouldn't be enough to qualify.

Anyways, BroCal is otp5eva 4 lyfe.

[lowkeyremi]

Shinso Hitoshi x implied fem!reader- HCS drabble (sfw)

lil note: even though the hcs are sfw i still wanna age shinso up bc 20+ shinso sounds so hot

Content: fluff, establish relationship, sleep... lots of sleep, not proofread bc im lazy

-Shinso on face time is one kind of person: the one who's camera is faced toward their ceiling and he barely responds to what you say

"it wasn't even my fault, do you get it?" you ask your boyfriend over the phone. he's currently listening to you bitch about this girl that you don't like. ".... mhm" you bring your phone right up to your face, "toshi are you even listening?" he shuffles for a second and you see a tuft of purple hair, "yeah" he watches as you set your phone back down onto the dresser it was formerly on, "good"

-Something tells me he texts like this "wsp bby" or "wyd"

-When he does have the energy its maxed, there's no in between. there's sleepy idgaf shinso then there's "AHABAHOUSAHODHOUH" shinso

"what the hell are you doing?" hitoshi is currently waving his arms around like he's crazy or something. "i'm trying that dance you were teaching me the other day." ... "it looked nothing like that." he runs toward your bed and tackles you, "what the h, man? are you hating on my dancing??" the small giggle that escapes your lips lets him know everything, "yes. yes i am."

-He was super insecure when u started dating. he was always telling you how you deserve better than him :((

-His place always smells so good, seems like a candle guy

"Ooooo, is that the sugar cookie wax melt?" Without bothering to look up at you he nods his head softly. "You like that one." It warms your heart that he goes out of his way to get your fav scent

-SPEAKING OF SCENTS i might be biased but he smells so good. not like the earthy kinda scent some guys go for. he smells sweet like vanilla and lavender or cinnamon.

-HATES when you take pictures of him (he's okay with it if you're in them but he hates pics of himself) you have to cutest ones too. when he's sleep, when he's cuddling you, and sometimes you record his reaction to goofy shit you buy him

-he can fall asleep absolutely any where.

"Hitoshi, I got the snacks you wan-" Shinso's hood is over his head and he's sleeping on the bench outside of the corner store. "I was only in there for like two minutes..." You shake him violently because it's the only way to wake him. "huh?" he slowly opens those beautiful purple eyes, "come on toshi, let's go."

-I just know he snores, and it's not the obnoxious loud kind, more like white noise ik this aint abt shota but he definitly snores too

Hitoshi doesn't believe he snores, even though you've told him countless times he does. You've decided to record him tonight just to prove that you were right. His soft snores can be heard even with his comforter covering his head..

-Type of boyfriend to tease/"bully" you but if his friends tried to do it he'd get mad

-claims he's the best cook and he can only make scrambled eggs and rice

-he's 100% a small time gamer/streamer and his fans love you, cuz they'll see you bring him tea/water or some food and kiss his forehead and such

"Need anything else, before I go lay down?" He leans into your touch, "nah. thank you pretty." you kiss his forehead, "of course, you need to stay hydrated."

[musingsofahufflepuff]

coffee shop headcanons

mattheo, enzo, theo, blaise, & draco; fluff

a/n: to all my draco people, sorry for the draco slander. also, first time writing about blaise and draco, so they might be ooc, don’t yell at me. this is shamelessly more starbucks focused bc i work there. another lil guy to make up for how long the theo soulmate au is taking ♡

Mattheo

♡ this man is a cold brew guy, whatever delivers the most caffeine the fastest. inject it into his veins if you must.

♡ definitely adds espresso shots to all his drinks, even the cold brew.

♡ energy drink in one hand, coffee in the other.

♡ i’m biased, but i think he’d vibe with a lavender chai when he’s not getting his fix. (if you catch him ordering a dirty chai, mind your business)

Enzo

♡ he’s a “barista’s choice” kinda guy.

♡ he’ll walk up to the cashier and with that charming little smile of his go, “i’ll have whatever your favorite is.”

♡ he frequently gets little heart doodles and stickers added to his cups bc the employees love him.

♡ this boy also loves a seasonal drink and will get his friends to get one with him.

Theo

♡ espresso lover, 100%

♡ however, if the beans are shit, don’t bother.

♡ latte art lover, you can make a little cat drawing on his coffee?? do it, do it rn.

♡ secretly loves a pumpkin spice latte with enzo.

Blaise

♡ iced coffee all the way, no sweeteners bc he likes the taste.

♡ will also drink black brewed coffee, dark roast.

♡ can and has been suckered into getting a seasonal drink with enzo

♡ ofc he doesn’t actually like them, why would you ask him that???

Draco

♡ fucking iced matcha lattes because they’re a bitch to make.

♡ or he’s getting the equivalent of a frappuccino/frozen coffee. (the guys tease him relentlessly for this)

♡ does not like the taste of coffee, so he has to add a ton of milk and sugar to it.

♡ he just prefers tea.

[jibanyans-chocobar]

As a funfact for y'all, you know how Peso has a Latino accent in the US version of the show, right?

Turns out there's a part of Antarctica that belongs to Argentina and also another one that belongs to Chile, which are both countries that belong to South America and are considered Latino countries. And yup, i researched, there are penguins who live in both of them. Funny thing? These countries' native currencies are called "Peso". Argentine Peso and Chilean Peso, but they're both called Peso.

The creators actually researched and named Peso after the currency intentionally and i'm dying. 😭✨‼️

As a Latina, i already knew this, but i thought i might as well share this piece of information to y'all because YES. Might make an in-depth post abt this later btw, especifically about how the education system works in both of those countries and an approximate age of how old Peso would be (or is) if he graduated from his Medical School THERE.

I personally headcanon that Peso is from Chile, but that's just me being biased because The Octonauts' VA'S from the Latin Spanish dubs are Chilean lol- (I'm neither from Chile or Argentina but the fact that the VA'S are Chilean makes me headcanon that 😭) (Most of the VA'S from the Latin Spanish dub of The Octonauts also worked for the Latin Spanish dub of Avatar: The Last Airbender, just another lil' funfact).

Anyways, enough rambling, this whole thing was pretty interesting to investigate even though i knew most of it (but i managed to investigate in a more in-depth manner) ngl.

Byeee :D (idk what i'm doing with my life i'm so hyperfixated on The Octonauts please help me-)

[byanyan]

the most important thing we talked about? how suga used to be at the bottom of her list but now he's in her top 3

oops getting drunk & staying up until almost 6am with ur mom watching bts content and crying together talking about irl shit

[craziechwiv]

Who's scarier, Ren or Nora?

Yang: It's gotta be Nora Rubes.

Ruby: Nuh, uh! It's Ren, silent but deadly trope?

Yang: That's a biased opinion and you know it!

Ruby: Just because we have one of those on our team doesn't mean it's biased! It's common knowledge!

Yang: Oh my- wait is that Jaune? Let's go ask him.

Ruby: Yea, then you'll see how wrong you are!

Yang: Keep dreaming lil sis.

Jaune is walking until he is suddenly pushed against a wall and pinned, he was gonna shake his aggressors off him till he realizes who they were.

Jaune: Uhm...whatever I did was probably a dare!

Ruby: Not what we're here for Jaune, we need to settle something and you're our prime source for the answer!

Jaune, looking at Yang: That would be...?

Yang: Who's more scarier, Ren or Nora?

Jaune: Oh, well let me go first.

Yang and Ruby let go of Jaune as he stretches out his limbs before leaning back on the wall.

Jaune: Okay, to answer this I need something more than who's scarier. Give me a scenario.

Yang: When we're on missions! Have you seen Nora mess up those Grimms last time? I'm pretty sure some we're running away from her actually.

Ruby: So? Ren is also quite lethal too! One minute he's firing precise shots at them and the next he's cutting them up like sushi!

Jaune: Well, I have to side with Yang here. Nora is more gruesome than Ren there.

Yang: HA!

Ruby: Aw...

Jaune: However...Ren is still more scary in general.

Yang: What?! How?

Ruby: :O

Jaune: Only for one incident...

Yang: And what might that be?

Ruby: Yeah tell us!

Jaune: Well...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nora is skipping along the hallways of beacon before being stopped by someone

Random student: Hey you're Nora, right? Fancy work you did with that weapon of yours!

Nora: Oh, thanks! You're too kind.

R.S.: Say, how's about we hang out from time to time? I'd like to spar with you.

Nora: Oh no thanks, I already have a sparring partner and I'm on the track to meet him actually-

The random student then grabs Nora's hand by surprise.

R.S.: Well, how about we go to my dorm then~?

Nora: Wait- what?! I don't really, uh...

R.S.: Aw cmon, we'll have lots of- *thunk, thunk*

The random student feels something metallic behind his head and freezes in place, not wanting to turn around and see what it may be.

Ren: She said, she doesn't want to.

Nora: Renny?

R.S.: Easy bro...it was just a suggestion.

Ren: Then me disposing of your life is an answer.

R.S.: You- You won't get away with this!

Ren: I can if you can't recognize me.

R.S.: Why you...

The random student tries to take a swing at Ren, only swinging at air before he feels a sharp object on the back of his neck, barely pricking its way through his skin layer.

Ren: When I count to ten, you'll run. 1...

The random student was already running down the hallways, not looking back at all. Ren then turns towards Nora.

Ren: Uhm...sorry about that?

Nora, who's flustered and looking at Ren in a whole new light: D-Don't worry about it Renny...how about we skip training actually?

Ren: Are you sure?

Nora: I'd let pancakes burn in a fire right now just to be in a bed with you right now!

Ren: O-Oh....okay, lead the- WOAH!

Ren is picked up by the muscle shortie and carried all the way to their dorm room, leaving a bewildered Jaune Arc who was watching the whole scenario from the corner.

Jaune...what the fu-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yang:

Ruby:

Jaune: So yeah. Ren is way scarier...when it comes to Nora. Which is a lot.

Yang: That was...not what I was expecting...

Ruby: That is...super hot~.

Yang: RUBY! That is the last time you read one of Blake's book.

[sixxrock666]

Can I please ask for more Mötley Crüe with a platonic reader, it was surprisingly really wholesome but yet really creative and energetic, please and thank you, love <33

thank u sweets<33 of course here u go more mötley crüe shenanigans :))

Part 2

can you tell I’m a little Tommy biased (￣ω￣;)

• you would love to braid their hair, especially Tommys, since he was always eager to get it done. You usually had some problems regarding Nikki and Mick but at the end of the day they would let you anyways

• since Nikki and Tommy get into a lot of arguments just pissing each other off all of the time, when a physical fight would break out you would always have to be the one to pull them apart. When they would finally settle down you’d scold them, and they would just sit there like sad lil puppies

• late night talks with Mick on your bed while you are painting yours and his nails, his strictly black. He would always grumble about it but would secretly enjoy it

• i feel like Tommy would get slightly possessive over u sometimes, he just wants to spend time with you in peace without others interfering, jealous boy :o

• clingy Tommy when drunk>>> hed be all over you ,Nikki, Vince and Mick, would lean on your shoulder and even fall asleep in your lap sometimes

• Vince would adore taking care of you, just random acts of service here and there like bringing you a glass of water and some pills and setting them on your nightstand whenever you’d get drunk

• you’d borrow their t-shirts all the time

“is that my shirt”

“might be yours Vince, might be Nikkis”

• once in a while you’ll all gang up on mick and tease him or some shit till he ends up chasing you all and cursing the shit out of you

• impulsively getting matching tattoos in the middle of the night, drunk with the boys

• inside jokes with Mick>>>> you’d randomly say something only you two would get and you’d just start laughing like two crazy idiots. The rest of the boys would just sit there and stare confused

• the only time they would eat homemade food is if you’d cook because they would be helpless, they would either burn the whole kitchen down or make so much mess while trying to make eggs and bacon -_-

They loved it when u did cook for them tho-Tommy’s for sure licking that plate up

• alright hear me out, movie night but it’s pure chaos

☆ you’d take forever trying to pick out a movie, you would end up arguing and pulling and chasing until one of you eventually won. Not everyone would be happy about it and would just complain throughout the whole movie

☆“ you can’t be serious this is so fucking predictable”

“ Vince shut it and watch the movie”

“ but look i fucking told you he’s gonna-“

Would get a pillow in the face so he’d shut up

☆if you’d watch some romantic shit Vince and Tommy would end up crying openly over it, and then you’d catch Nikki and make fun of him, until he would literally tackle you on the couch so you’d shut up

☆Tommys picking some sappy romance, a cartoon or some sex related shit, there’s no in between

• the boys can never say no when you do the puppy eyes except Mick of course, he’s a little devil

• you’d help them die their hair, but it would just end up with you all messing around and in the end the hair dye would be everywhere except where it’s supposed to be-the hair

Part 3

☆彡𐬾𐮚✧✯⁂☆

[killakalx]

hiii new here :)

love your writing, do you have any roy harper headcanons? petnames, dirty talk, kinks?

xo g

hi nonnie!! tysm ☹️🫶🏽 i don’t have many bc i don’t know too much about him, so i can’t make a full post for hcs atm :( but i will say a few!!!

he seems like he loves the softer ones: sweetheart, doll, pretty girl, and he likes calling you hun when he feels a lil sentimental or romantic. when he’s in a rougher mood i sort of think he likes uh… older names??? i dunno i think he’d call you a harlot or a simple “fuck, you’re nasty” over calling you a slut or whore. tells you that you look like a pornstar when you choke on his dick but he’s a mess if you let him fuck your face, gets all breathless and needy. then he’s making it up to you after bruising your throat :(.

i think his dirty talk earlier in the relationship is more dominant or purposeful, for the sake of impressing you or turning you on. but he looks like the kinda guy to fall in love real hard and get a bit weaker for ya yk? he goes from snarky and teasing remarks to praising and getting noisy about how good you feel around his cock. poor guy can’t even decide how he wants to fuck you sometimes. and this may be me being biased but he gives munch to me! i’ve said this before but one of the first things he asks from you is to sit on his face, like. on his hands and knees for it. then he gets a better idea and get obsessed with 69! don’t quote me but that has got to be his favorite position. and i’ve also said this before but he likes it when you’re loud too, he needs to know he’s making you feel just as good as he feels.

which also leads to my next one! praise kink. both ways. it just has to be that way for him. and and and it might just be cuz of this one fic i obsessed over for weeks after i read it… dare i say he has a little mommy kink? just a lil bit. therefore it also makes sense that he’d be obsessed with your tits and he don’t give no fucks about how big or small they are. ty for dropping by lvr, that’s all i got <3

[sucuretcannelle]

hi! i briefly remember you saying that you're into if's, so i was wondering what your favorites are

Sighs and shakes a red cup full of ice

Nobody thinks I'm a nerd till they hear the way I talk about interactive fiction...no one knows...

Anyway I started playing IF's in like December. Time flies

This is kind of in order? Of like enjoyment. HOWEVER take this with a grain of salt because I was sitting here trying to rearrange them (except the top 3) for 40 minutes. If it was mentioned, it's good 🙂‍↕️

1. The six that thrive by @the-six-that-thrive-if —

the way I was playing this bro. I wouldn't let myself sleep until I was done with the demo and not because it felt like I had to, but I knew I would be PISSED if I went to bed without absorbing all the content (Dante give me a chance PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏). Anyway the hierarchy system reminds me of the one that I have for the way I wrote hell and I was like 🫵 OMG THATS SO COOL.

Key factor that I appreciate: Dialogue, descriptions, and transitions. Dante is deadass so funny I'm not even playing bro. Buddy how do you write like that, lmk. Also the official art has me gnawing at the bars of my enclosure

2. College Tennis: Origin Story by @collegetennisoriginstory — I ACTUALLY HAVE A FUCKING PROBLEM BRO. LOOK. IN MY HEAD, I WAS IGNORING THAT THEY WERE PLAYING TENNIS SO I WAS VISUALIZING VOLLEYBALL. SO AT SOME POINT I READ THE WORD RACKET AND I WAS LIKE WHAT ARE WE PLAYING???

Key factor that I appreciate: Skill checks, attention to side characters, amazing use of character tropes. Idk how to describe it but the writing felt so CLEAN. Like so organized and orderly. Plus I wanna study all of the characters under a microscope

3. Superstition (omg first IF I ever played) by @13leaguestories — I played this while I was sick and that's literally all I did for 2 days besides eating and sleeping. Am I okay? Yeah cuz it happened in December but like I was OBSESSED. And ashamed. My friend told me i would be into Zillah and she was right. I haven't recovered. I promise I'm in therapy.

Key factor that I appreciate: The fact that there was always something going on. Literally at least 3 things were happening at the same time, all the time, and it kept my lil depressed ass stimulated. Who could ask for more

4. Infamous by @infamous-if — this game makes me scared of commitment cuz I can't have Orion and Griffin😐 I might be biased because. I sing! So I was just really connected to this story immediately. Either way, one of my favs cuz the writing is saurrrr good, makes ya feel

Key factor that I appreciate — Infamous is generally well rounded, so I don't feel like it's LACKING in anything. Me gusta.

5. Mind blind by @mindblindbard — I have a problem so I'm a stereotypical Rosie fan. But anyway I personally loved this one because of the world building, even tho I'm a character-focused girlie. Plus the game is so funny for no reason

Key factor that I appreciate— I actually really like the MC in general. Which is funny to say, because they're supposed to be you, but MC's are different from game to game, and I like this one

6. Soulmates Inc by @soulmatesinc-if — idk with some games, it's just the vibe. Like the vibe is right so I'll read it (which like...it's hard for me to find games where the vibe is what drags me along. Tis really good)

Key factor I appreciate — Wyatt. omg who said that...I also love this game's take on soulmates. It's simple, but original, and I fw it

7. Nine Blood Dances by @nineblooddances-if— I'm boutta cry, how did you end up here twice without me noticing bro. Idk this one and TSTT have like, vibes that are connected by a small string, and I did play this one first if that matters.

Key factor that I enjoyed: It felt very structured, and again, clean. I really don't know what this feeling is

8. When Twilight Strikes by @evertidings — I love ALL the characters because damn near all of them pissed me off once. That's actually impressive /pos. Anyway Rylan hit my line

Key factor that I enjoyed: watching my relationship descriptions change. Some left me devastated stop... Like sorry A you're driving me nuts...

Honorable mentions:

Apartment 502 by @apt502-if — I can't wait to see the future parts cuz like I like it but I cant analyze any of the characters yet. But trust me I'm ready 📝

The Kings Hound by @the-kingshound — Same typa situation was Apartment 502... I'm waiting...patiently 📝

[greenfiend]

Will Byers the Love Guru

In Stranger Things 3, he’s the one who’s “not gonna fall in love”, yet he’s out there fixing every one else’s relationship problems…

Lucas/Max

Jonathan/Nancy

Dustin/Suzie

Hopper/Joyce

and even…

Mike/Eleven…

So come along on this wild journey with me as I explain Will’s influence on those pairings…

Before I begin, I must remind you that everything is intentional within this show. If Will suddenly appears within a shot or someone says or does something that doesn’t seem relevant… it is still relevant but just not in the way you might initially think.

I’m going to start with the more simple “fixes” and end with the most complicated.

Lucas/Max

Their relationship in ST3 was fairly low key. Their “breakups” were not serious and were always temporary. Lucas does mess up at times though.

Oops! Code red! Code red! Lucas needs some help asap!

Well that was a close call! Thanks to Will of course, who magically appeared in this shot and clearly influenced Lucas.

Will understands the mysteries of the female species better than these guys clearly. Not sure what they’d do without him.

Jonathan/Nancy

Jonathan and Nancy had a major fight in ST3, and Will is having none of his big bro’s BS! He instantly calls him out for not being there for Nancy.

Will strikes again! Thank goodness for his influence. What a good little bro!

Dustin/Suzie

Okay, things are getting stranger now.

No one believes Dustin has a girlfriend… except for our dear lil Will! But I can’t really blame the others, she did seem unbelievable. I mean she did come from “Camp Know Where”. Sounds pretty made up to me.

Did Will conjure her up? Well… let’s just say it’s interesting that the first ever shot we see of her involves her holding up a book about a wizard… I’m not ruling this out as a possibility… 🧙🏻‍♂️

Hopper/Joyce

Oh Will… sweet sweet Will. He’s worried about his mother, and doesn’t want her to be alone anymore… so what does he do, you ask? Well…

He Marty Mcflys it! He influences Hopper by “flaying” him and pushes him together with his mom!

Things get a tad awkward though. But his intentions were pure!

Mike/Eleven

So… this one is the most complicated one because Will is very biased here obviously. He’s hopelessly in love with Mike. In the beginning, he had a hand in Mike and El’s breakup as he was pulling the strings behind Hopper’s intervention. Hopper “threatened” Mike due to Will’s influence. Now, don’t worry, Will didn’t actually threaten to kill Mike, Mike made that very clear.

Mike and Will have their epic rain fight and things are tense.

Until… Will has a change of heart.

Notice how Will is clearly in the shot here? Well it’s because he is wanting to give his “olive branch” to Mike. He’s tried of the tension between them and wants to make things right.

Look at the words here! These are not Mike’s words. They’re Will’s words to Mike!

Both of these moments are Will putting words into Mike’s mouth, just as he did to Lucas, Jonathan, and Hopper! But he’s not as successful.

The first moment was just bad timing as El was not even present. The second time, the connection was poor, that’s why Mike was literally drawing blanks and unable to complete his sentences. We know this because the walkie talkie call from Dustin provided the subtext for it.

Mike actually doesn’t even remember saying the words because Will said them for him…

In conclusion, Will is a great love guru, but still cannot fix Mike and El’s problems. Dunno if even the most powerful wizard could successfully fix their problems…