#I mean the Disney Pocahontas
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What's your favourite scene in any of the Emily Windsnap books?
Mary Penelope regaining all her memories of Jake! From Book 1. It’s my favorite for several reasons…
It’s such a wholesome mother-daughter moment, where she opens up to Emily more than ever.
It’s such an intense and emotionally satisfying moment. After all the BS Emily went through to help her mom remember. Especially after Emily’s first failed attempt. The moment Mary P. regains her memories , she says everything I’ve always wanted to her say!!! First she furiously tells off Mr. Beeston, tells Emily the ENTIRE truth about Jake, and so passionately supports Emily being a mermaid ❤️
It’s THE moment ALL of Emily’s questions — and my questions — are answered. Did her dad really love her and her mom? Why exactly don’t her mom and grandparents get along? How did her mom react to her dad being a merman? So how would she react to her daughter being a mermaid?
It’s the most accurate account we hear of Jake. From someone who loves him and has no reason to lie or hide the truth. Until this point, all we’re told of Jake is that he’s a criminal and a deadbeat dad — from 2 people who clearly dislike Jake, making them unreliable resources. One of those 2 people lied.
We learn just how much Jake and Mary P. sacrificed to stay together. He risked a lifetime of imprisonment for her, she cut all contact with her family for him.
Jake&Mary P’s first meeting has this Romeo & Juliet /Little Mermaid/Pocahontas vibe that makes me instantly root for them for the rest of the series. They also remind of Odysseus and Penelope. Jake&Mary P. were my Edward&Bella.
I just love the imagery of the Rainbow Rocks. I tend to love any scene with them.
They’re probably THE first merman/human romance ever in pop culture. At least the first one I ever read about or saw. Seriously the only other examples I can think of came afterwards (Mabel/Mermando, Elisa/The Amphibian Man, etc.) Which makes me wonder if/why there were any before them.
You can tell this scene is my favorite by how many times I drew it 😉
#ask#answer#orithetreticent#emily Windsnap#emily Windsnap fanart#The tail of emily Windsnap#middle grade fiction#middle grade series#middle grade books#Jake Windsnap#mary penelope windsnap#Jake and Mary P were my Edward and Bella#Praying for the movies to do their scenes justice#my artwork#also when I say Pocahontas#I mean the Disney Pocahontas#I know the real Pocahontas’ story and Disney’s Pocahontas are VERY different#mermaid#merman
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"Marry Kocoum? But he's so...serious."
Pocahontas (1995)
#rip kocoum u will always be famous to Me#pocahontas (1995)#pocahontas x john smith#pocahontasedit#pocahontasgif#disneyedit#disneygif#disney's pocahontas#disney john smith#disney pocahontas#pocahontas#john smith#pocajohn#queso*edit#queso*gif#point is one of the first things pocahontas sees john do is SMILE and EXPRESS HIMSELF with total abandon#i am firmly in the camp that kocoum and pocahontas marrying in this movie would have been terrible for both of them#pocahontas bc she needed someone who matched her freak and kocoum was incapable of that (however well meaning he might be)#and kocoum bc he was trying to manufacture normalcy after experiencing the horrors of war#and just like any hemingway character he would Not have succeeded (mostly bc pocahontas is just Not the angel that could save him/fix him)#in this essay i—
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You know, it's not that bad of a stained glass, it only sucks specifically when it's supposed to be Descendants Beast/Adam and Belle. Bc as like, fanart of the og animated movie? It rocks.
#beauty and the beast#disney descendants#descendants#descendants 2#this was background details at cotillion#apparently they made stained glasses for all the princess and their princes#and we just never got to see it properly which is SUPER COMPLETELY DISAPPOINTING#but also probably the reason for that was bc the glasses were all clearly based off animated disney princesses and princes#which means that adam looks nothing like descendants adam. sleeping beauty is clearly white and blond. and other details that don't fit#also pocahontas and john smith were there in stained glass form too which i don't even want to consider what that means
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How would each Disney princess react to meeting Mozenrath? We already know about Jasmine from the series.
I'll be honest and say that I haven't seen all of the Disney Princess movies, so this will be going off of what I know and what's provided by the character descriptions from different Wikis.
Snow White: Snow White would probably be the easiest for Moze to manipulate since “Stranger Danger” is not a concept she holds to very well. Still, once she learns that he isn't the kindest person, she'd probably try to ignore him. Fortunately, she herself doesn't have anything too magical on her, so Mozenrath would be more likely to pursue someone like Grimhilde than he would her.
Cinderella: Cinderella likes how he looks and thinks his outfit is interesting, but she isn't a fan of pretty much anything else. He's rude and he bosses his minions around, not to mention that he's dismissive or outright critical of anything that doesn't benefit him. It all reminds her of some certain family members of hers, and she's not itching to go through that again.
Aurora: He's a stranger, but even apart from being a stranger, he's a bit… unnerving. She can't quite put her finger on it, though the slight stinging pain in her finger may give her, or at least her biological and adoptive family, a hint as to why.
Ariel: Mozenrath meeting Ariel would be interesting for both of them. For Ariel, it's a human who has a similar amount of magic, if not more, than Ursula. For Mozenrath, it's the daughter of the legendary and VERY magical King Triton. They'd definitely go out of their way to study each other, though Ariel would be a bit more wary considering what she's experienced by the end of the film. She'd more than likely eventually get herself into trouble or fall into a trap from Mozey. Still, Ariel has a lot of friends in high places, so that wouldn't end well for him.
Belle: Mozenrath isn’t as loud as Gaston is, so that's at least something in his favor. He's also intelligent and well-read, along with having an interest in magic and seeming a bit more thoughtful. She could maybe admire him as a "villainous character," like one that she'd find in the books that she reads. That being said, he's still very much a villain, and one that acts rather demeaning around women (Jasmine and Eden at least,) so there's no way she's supporting him in any of his endeavors. I do honestly think that Mozey may enjoy Belle's presence at least a little, though. She'd probably be the type of person to come closest to redeeming him. …Which still wouldn't be much, but it is at least something.
Pocahontas: Ohohoho, Pocahontas would DESPISE Mozey for disrupting the natural order of things. She would dislike him for reanimating the dead, she would dislike how he treats Xerxes, she would dislike him trying to conquer and enslave groups of creatures… Plus, Grandmother Willow talks crap about him, and no one disagrees with Grandmother Willow! Mozey wouldn't have much to say about her apart from her being a nuisance to his plans.
Mulan: Now this would be interesting. Mulan wouldn't be sure how she feels about Mozenrath at the start. He's got magical undead soldiers that follow his every will, yeah, but every emperor has guards and soldiers. He's got a magical animal companion, just like her, and he seems to know his way around politics. It isn't until Mozenrath starts flaunting his more omnicidal morals that Mulan can officially decide that she doesn't like him. Funnily enough, she definitely would be one to catch Mozenrath off guard, which is to say that Mozey caught those hands. As he's tending to his bruises later on, Mozenrath realizes that Mulan reminds him of Jasmine quite a bit, which is not a compliment on his end.
Tiana: Mozenrath's magic reminds Tiana of some people that she knows. Unfortunately, his personality is much more Dr. Facilier than it is Mama Odie, so she's pretty sure she knows what to make of him immediately. She at least approves of his work ethic.
Rapunzel: Rapunzel would at least be a little more trusting when she first meets Mozey due to his softer “non-thug” appearance. Unfortunately, Mozenrath would be ALL over her. A woman with hair that could heal any wound and reverse a person's age?! He would want that power so desperately, but he wouldn't want to deal with a living person to get it. Rapunzel probably interacts with him and then finds that some of her hair had turned brown, much to Mozey's chagrin. There would be a full scheme with Mozey just trying to drain the power from Rapunzel's hair. Rapunzel, meanwhile, is unsure what to think since she certainly dislikes Mozenrath but feels bad about his physical condition. Whether she decides to try and heal him or not would depend on how far Mozey gets in his scheme, but he gets more than his fair share of bumps on the head from the frying pan.
Merida: Oh man, I want a full movie with just the events that come about from these two interacting. Merida wouldn't support Mozenrath in any of the stuff that he does, but if she felt that she could survive the situation, I imagine that she would try to manipulate him into making a deal with her. She's already had experience with purchasing dubious spells from shady magic users and fighting literal monsters with her bow, so dealing with Mozenrath would be like reliving her strongest teenage rebellion days all over again. On the other side of the coin, Mozenrath's opinion of her would be flipping faster than his temper. She's royalty, she's rebellious, she's a princess, she's a swordswoman, she's naive, she's manipulative, she's headstrong, she retreats at danger… I could imagine Mozenrath and Merida going on one of those enemies to begrudging allies journeys where they're just bickering the entire time and getting way too close to literally killing each other with magic and weaponry. At the very least, they could go to each other for some sort of deal, like buying spells or trading goods. Either way, there would probably be casualties.
Moana: Moana is someone that Moze would have to keep an eye on. She'd have very strong opinions on his use of magic, and while she'd consider what her father said about striving for peace and safety, she goes to throw hands the moment she thinks Moze may have any schemes involving her or pretty much any other island. Mozenrath would also be very interested in the magical items that Moana interacted with in the past, so trying to use her while seeking out the Heart of Te Fiti or Maui's Hook wouldn't be out of the question.
Anna: I think Anna would be a bit taken in by Mozenrath's “fair” appearance when she first meets him, with her wasting no time in telling him how pretty his hair and robes look. Mozenrath would find plenty to manipulate from Anna, like her loneliness, her desire to belong, her care for everyone, her love for her sister… As long as he didn't show his hand too quickly, Anna could be manipulated into getting quite a few goods or doing a few tasks. Unfortunately for Mozenrath, Anna still has quite a bit of fight in her, and she would probably give Mozenrath the same treatment that she gave to Hans at the end of the film. That is to say, Mozenrath gets punched square in the face.
Elsa: Elsa has a lot of trust issues from the get-go because of her time alone. She's wary of Mozenrath from the start of their interactions and is very hesitant to make any deals with him. The fact that Mozenrath would be constantly referencing her power would definitely drive her away, and it wouldn't be long before she isolated herself from him completely. These two would be enemies for sure, whether Elsa knew of Mozenrath's true colors or not.
Raya: Mozenrath would not help with Raya's trust issues. It would only take a few moments for Raya to decide that she doesn't like him and to finger him as a threat. If she doesn't go on the offensive right away, she would in probably less than a minute after hearing him talk.
Asha: Asha would probably be the most welcoming out of anyone to Mozenrath when she first meets him. Maybe he wants a tour or could use some information! Mozenrath certainly would like at least some information, especially anything regarding Rosas and its wish-granting king. It probably would take Asha seeing Moze's cruelty in-person before she figures out what he's really like. At that point, I really hope she throws a bookshelf on him cause it'd be ironic and hilarious.
#I forgot how much I love Merida. I want a full story on her and Mozenrath bickering and almost killing each other#so far I haven't seen Snow Whie / Pocahontas / Raya / and Wish. ...Yes the Disney fan hasn't seen Snow White#Mozenrath would definitely be interested in some characters more than others based on their interaction with magic#that being said I think he'd probably be EVERYONE'S enemy. I said that Belle would be closest because she has experience#I've seen a lot of people ship Moze with the Disney Princesses. ...I mean I see the appeal but Moze is just... Moze. He's a creep#doesn’t mean I don't love him tho#mozenrath#aladdin the series#aladdin the animated series#disney princess#snow white#cinderella#princess aurora#princess ariel#disney belle#disney pocahontas#mulan#princess tiana#rapunzel#princess merida#moana#princess anna#queen elsa#disney raya#disney asha#disney
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cinderella has the lowest high note of all the disney princesses and like. doesn't that just sound fake? you'd think that because she's the second disney princess, and sandwiched by the two highest singers (snow white and aurora), she'd also sing pretty high but. no. she is the most solidly an alto of all of them. anyway i stan my alto queen.
#for reference: cinderella is g3-db5#snow white is d4-b5#aurora is c4-a5#and then the others bc i can't copy paste the pinterest post#ariel is c4-d5#belle is g3-eb5#jasmine is c4-f5#pocahontas is g3-e5#mulan is ab3-d5#tiana is g3-e5#rapunzel is g3-e5#anna (who isnt part of the line up but i digress) is a3-e5#elsa (again not part of the line up) is f3-e5#which tracks bc if you have idina menzel. you use as much of her voice as you can#and moana is gb3-d5#it also means that the cinderella and moana have the same midpoints of their voices which. wild#disney princess#disney cinderella#it's FASCINATING to me
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need to binge the masterlist…. long overdue but ๐·°(⋟﹏⋞)°·๐ (˃̣̣̥ᯅ˂̣̣̥) "(っ- ‸ - ς)ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 (꩜ᯅ ꩜。) ദ്ദി˙ ᴗ ˙ ) interpret this message
also i have almost (almost......) forgiven you for The Crime™ but i will be mourning its loss while i read this #seventeen fluff fic…….. also can’t say i’m surprised about mingyu being bullied but mc better than me because i would Not let him be my EX
vernon already going through it at work and then there’s mc god (Pretending I Don’t Know What Vernon’s About To Be Put Through) but oml him geeking over how pretty she is what if i Die <///3 the disney movie discrimination is CRAZYYY if vernon was woke enough he would’ve been even More down bad after the disney princess movie question
He tried, as confidently as he could, to voice out his supposed opinion. “Nolan’s Inception is one of the greatest films ever made.”
LMFAOOOO THIS MADE ME LAUGH TOO SORRY VERNON of course he’s a christopher nolan fanboy 🤮
HIM TAKING HIS SISTERS MOVIE SET IS INSANEEEEE i would never forgive him fr but also from mc’s perspective…… waoww ❤️ he want me so bad ❤️
vernon: Mingyu was the biggest piece of shit to grace the halls of his university me: 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 #NEEDTHAT
Your smirk deepened. “Judging by your blush, you’re either terrible at lying…or,” you offered, voice lowering a little as you drummed your fingers against the counter, “You’ve never had a hot girl this close to you.”
my queen why en GET HIM AGAIN!!!!!
this might as well be a contract killing with the way they’re about to swipe mingyu’s entire collection Tbh but ACTUALLY SO VALID BECAUSE WHY IS MINGYU SLANDERING MC LIKE THIS 😡 also vernon feeling guilty for being an asshole because of his hate boner for mingyu #truelove
AND VERNON AGREEING TO THIS PLAN WITH ZERO CONTEXT OF WHAT IT IS LIKE HE IS DOWN HORRENDOUSSSS he’s so valid tho don’t let anyone hurt ur queen <3
“Please tell me, Miss Bond, how are you planning to carry this out?” You offered him an incredulous look. “I don’t know what that reference means, I’m too pretty.”
LMFAOAOOA THIS IS THEE BEST TWO LINER ok three but like. ok just the dialogue. ok.
vernon malfunctioning because he insinuated he wanted to see mc again and in the context of robbing mingyu’s house again GODDD WHAT A LOSERRR (i want him so bad u have no idea) (god i should’ve bullied u harder into writing that smut scene)
You still could not believe how your ex-boyfriend was taking this long for the realisation to hit. Even when Eric jumped up on the screen, holding onto the ship’s ropes, the watcher only regarded the character intently, as if he was somehow part of the stranger film.
LMFAOOO WHY DID IT TAKE HIM SO LONG TO REALIZE FUCKKK he just secretly really enjoyed watching it ❤️ AND HIM TAKING SO LONG ON MULAN TOO i love my men useless with innate babygirlism so somehow this isn’t even giving me the ick .
VERNON HALFWAY OUT THE WINDOW AND MINGYU STILL CALLING HIM A NERD GODDD HOW ARE U GONNA ROB SOMEONE AND STILL GET GAGGED . okay wait my bad i read further and he actually followed up with the craziest line ever #ThankYouAmourCheol like wow. true literature
the way he’s so endeared even though she’s geeking out to disney Omg that is called real true love <3 UR KIDDING HES GONNA KISS HER TO THIS SONG….WWAOWW oh i killed myself i really did <3//33 WOW WOWW….. and she likes him sm missing out on TANGLED for a man like gawd. and the shrek reveal was so perfect he really matched her freak in the end
worst timeskip of my life TELL US WHAT HAPPENED IN BETWEEN. also the fact that it was to shrek goddd they were boning to all star
THE BARBENHEIMER SCENE LMFAOOOO kitten and the reader killed themselves after reading that thank u mc Okay waow. CUTEST FACKING FIC EVER i need to die at the way he was ready to commit crimes for mc from beginning to end. his down badness needs to be studied. in a lab. with me as head scientist. anyways that was beautiful and i think fia ficology also needs to be studied because how does it hit every single time!!!!!!!
𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐨-𝐳𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝
❝Who knew all it takes is a hot girl with top-tier taste for a man to admit he's wrong?❞
𝒈 𝒆 𝒏 𝒓 𝒆 : fluff, comedy, suggestive, college! au
𝒘 𝒐 𝒓 𝒅 𝒄 𝒐 𝒖 𝒏 𝒕 : 21.7k words
𝒔 𝒖 𝒎 𝒎 𝒂 𝒓 𝒚 : self-proclaimed movie mastermind chwe vernon minds his business—whether that be avoiding the popular, problematic kids in his college to reducing customer interest in his parents' film store. his plan of isolation, however, is completely destroyed when you, a seemingly insane disney fan, slam his perfect movie taste and ask for his help to take down an evil ex.
𝒄 𝒐 𝒏 𝒕 𝒆 𝒏 𝒕 : loosely inspired by watching the detectives, film major! vernon who owns an outdated film store, fem! reader is the baddest (but also the craziest) bitch in this fic, vernon is a loser, film major! mingyu who will be violated many times in this fic sorry king, mentions of many filmbro films which will also be violated, self-indulgent mentions of some of my favourite films, a few super dark jokes nothing serious though, kissing, mentions of sex and the act of cumming (all joking wise) but no actual sex because im fearing god today (super suggestive at best), barbenheimer reference <3
𝒕 𝒂 𝒈 𝒍 𝒊 𝒔 𝒕 : @hyuckworld @junyangis @hiraethmae @lllucere @intoanothermind @kokoiinuts @shnnzsworld @lilifiedeans @talkyoongitome @vanishingboots @cookiearmy @person1fys
𝒂 𝒖 𝒕 𝒉 𝒐 𝒓 ' 𝒔 𝒏 𝒐 𝒕 𝒆 : she is finally here !! so so sorry for taking so long </3 i never thought it would be finished atp but thank you addy and alice for pushing me to complete this lil fic !! addy ur film major info birthed the filmbro slander, and alice...no smut LMAO LOSER anyway do enjoy homies <33
𝒑 𝒍 𝒂 𝒚 𝒍 𝒊 𝒔 𝒕 : if you're too shy (then let me know) by the 1975 || q&a by seventeen || wonderful women by the smiths || confidence by ocean alley || talk talk by charli xcx || oh my! by seventeen
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“NO, THE HOBBIT IS SET BEFORE THE LORD OF THE RINGS.”
This particular customer, however, refused to grasp the concept. “But the Hobbit was released after,” he repeated, as if he had not heard twenty minutes ago, when he first entered the store. “Wouldn’t it make sense to watch the more recent movies?”
Vernon clamped his lips together, stopping himself from saying something that would lose him a potential buyer. Well, not that it would matter much, considering the man before him could not comprehend what a prequel was, but still—he had to make this idiot understand.
“I understand that, sir, but the Hobbit is a prequel to the Lord of the Rings.” Holding onto the DVD set, he pointed to the grand picture of the movie’s protagonist. “It’s based on Bilbo Baggins’ adventures.”
“But was that not the little fellow from the Rings?”
“No, sir, that was Frodo. Bilbo is Frodo’s uncle.” The boy then clarified, tone heightening, “You know, where he reclaims his home from Smaug?”
“Smog?” The customer parroted incorrectly, scratching his hair as if the action would jog his memory. “Now why does this hobbit’s home have health violations?”
The twist of his lips was inevitable. “Smaug,” he corrected. “The dragon…the villain…the whole reason the movie was created?”
“See, I only know that one slimy creature with the ring. What was he always saying…” The man snapped his fingers, a lightbulb switching in his otherwise empty brain. “Ah, yes!” He then completely distorted his voice, rasping, “My presh-shious!”
For a split second, Vernon was a little gob-smacked at the impression. Then, he remembered he needed sales, and made sure to laugh as if that customer was the funniest man that ever stepped foot in the store.
This particular joker, who was clearly not understanding Vernon’s analogies, instead asked, “Well, which one do you recommend?”
Ah, the fated question.
Besides from the Lord of the Rings collection, he had been asked this very question a few too many times, when customers would browse the films on offer and ask for his opinion. Not that he considered himself an all-knowing master of movies—
He smiled. Now that was something he could chuckle about.
“Well, sir, the Lord of the Rings is a timeless classic. I would recommend it to anyone interested in a well-written, well-produced fantasy.”
The man twisted his lips. “But I don’t really like fantasy, though.”
Vernon could not help his smile dropping. I don’t get paid enough for this.
With as much strength he could muster, he persuaded the idiot to get a rom-com instead, and ushered him out.
He sighed, going back to the desk. The store was never busy—unsurprising, since nobody buys DVDs anymore—but that was how he liked it. The less customers that bothered him, the better. He did not want to be that type of guy, but he would rather have his own company than those who thought that the Marvel movies were God’s gift to man. (The Spiderman movies, however, he had to leave out of his apparently controversial statement).
Vernon was about to close the shop out of pure boredom when someone stepped in.
His eyes darted to the newcomer.
They stayed as he beheld you.
Perhaps this was a gross generalisation, but he did not expect someone so cute walking in a store this run-down. Maybe you had mistaken it for a vintage shop, planning to rob the CDs, or thought there might be decades old clothing in here. He was certain you had walked in by mistake, but then you began to browse the movie sections.
His first thought was that you seemed to have excellent taste.
You slowed your steps in the classics section, eyes roaming at the Fan Favourites shelf which was simply movies Vernon had seen this week. Still, they were amazing fucking movies, hence their place on the shelf, now being admired by the likes of you. He wondered what you thought of the one DVD you picked up, assessing the blurb at the back. Roman Holiday. The boy could have smiled—you truly had a knack for picking out special films.
Your fingers lingered on the movies for only a couple of minutes before you saw the desk—first the counter, and then the person behind it.
The fact that your first instinct was to smile at the boy behind the counter had a profound effect on him.
Now, he did not want to sound pathetic; he did not know you, had never seen you before, but someone this aesthetically pleasing did not come to stores like his. Someone who picks up Roman fucking Holiday and be this cute did not acknowledge boys like him.
But Vernon Chwe will be cool about it. He will not look like a loser in front of you.
He pretended to look over some DVDs on the counter desk as you approached him. “Hey, there,” you greeted, and only then he allowed himself to look up, glancing you over. Already you had propped your arms on the top, eyes darting around the store as if finding something which deserved your attention. “I wanted to ask about a specific film. Well, films.”
Films? Vernon really thought all the intelligent minds had rotted in this lifetime, but clearly you were an exception. “Of course,” he said, setting the movie on the side. “What genres are you interested in?” he ticked his head towards the Fan Favourites. “You were looking in the right place, to be fair.”
“Hmm?” you only spared that shelf a momentary—dismissive—glance. “Oh, sorry! I was looking for a specific box-set, but I can’t seem to find it on the shelves. I was hoping you could have it out back.”
Specific box-set? Vernon tried to contain his smile. Of course you were looking for a collection of timeless classics. “What’re you looking for?” he asked you, hoping you were going to request Hitchcock’s best. If you asked for Wong Kar-Wai’s trilogy, he might have fallen to his knees.
You smiled at him.
Then dropped the bomb.
“I don’t know if you’d have the Disney Princess box set? You know, the complete edition?”
Vernon’s eye twitched a little. What the fuck?
Your gaze on him did not shift. “Are you okay?”
It took a moment for him to realise that you had asked him a question. “Huh? Right, sorry,” he said hurriedly, mind rushing for the many possibilities as to why you had requested a set like that. Perhaps you were braindead? No, that was too harsh. But then, who was watching Disney movies at that age?
Then an idea came into his head, and it made him feel much better.
“So sorry about that,” he reiterated, scratching the back of his neck. “Anyway…Disney Princess set, huh?” He sighed out a laugh. “A sweet treat for your younger siblings, then.”
“Younger siblings?” A swift shake of your head, still smiling. “Haven’t got any of those.”
The twitching was back. “...anyone under the age of 12 you know?”
“Now you’re making me sound like a freak,” you mused, locking your hands together. “Is it that shocking that I’m getting the set for myself?”
Vernon’s any attempt to diffuse the conversation died the moment you said those words.
Disney. Princess. Movies. The box-set you wanted was a Disney. Fucking. Princess box-set.
At this rate, his eye-twitching was very much visible to you. “Don’t tell me no one’s ever bought a Disney movie from you,” you said, surprised by his change of attitude.
“Well,” he jeered, “I usually have first-time parents with their toddler kids asking me about sets like that.”
You then titled your head back a little, taken aback with the comment. “Are you saying I’m too old to watch Disney movies?”
“No!” he instinctively defended himself, though he had virtually no defence to offer. He had, in his own words, called you a hag.
This was it—he was usually stellar at keeping his opinions to himself. Now, the one time he could have kept his mouth shut, it spluttered open and not only embarrassed him, but one of the only cute potential customers. He was his own saboteur. His own destruction.
After catching the flurry of emotions on his face, you had a realisation.
Did his stupid comments get to you? Perhaps they would have, had you not seen his like before. Not only that, you had a sneaky feeling he himself had no clue on what category he was slotted into.
So you let the corners of your mouth curve upwards—up to the point where you were smirking, completely catching the boy off guard.
“My god, you’re a filmbro!”
Those emotions that you had witnessed now all conjoined into confusion. “Huh?” was his intelligent answer to the accusation. Filmbro?
And then you began to chuckle—little bursts of soft giggles, which escaped your mouth the more the revelation settled over you. “Wait, wait,” you began, “I need to ask this first!” You wiggled your finger at him. “What is your favourite film?”
Again, the fated question. This time, though, he felt as if his answer would not be the right one. Still—if there was one thing he was confident about, it was his expertise in films.
He tried, as confidently as he could, to voice out his supposed opinion. “Nolan’s Inception is one of the greatest films ever made.”
There was one, solitary, quiet moment.
It was ruined by the subsequent laughter, courtesy of your mouth, which could not shut after his answer. You had to grip the counter, cackling at the response, and Vernon could only gawk at you, face reddening with every second spent watching you keel over.
After what seemed like a lifetime (but was only about thirty seconds), Vernon finally cleared his throat. “Alright now, that’s enough comedy,” he muttered.
Another thirty seconds later, you finally seemed to calm down. The mischievous mirth on your face, although would have had any man swooning at your feet, seemed to irritate him all the more. “I’m sorry,” you gasped out, wiping a slight tear from your eye, “You just…you reminded me of my boyfriend.”
Of course. Vernon nearly clicked his tongue in disappointment. Of course the pretty, borderline-mean, borderline-terrible-taste-in-movies girl was taken. Fuck my life, son.
Your smile flickered—almost as if it turned cruel. “My mistake…ex-boyfriend.”
His eyebrow then raised a little. Maybe life can be unfucked; maybe the pretty, not-that-mean-as-he-thought, changeable-taste-in-movies girl was still attainable.
Your eyes wandered once more, but this time to your hands. “I was actually going to get the Disney Princess set for him.”
The eyebrow decided to raise further up. He was dying to know why you were 1) getting your ex-boyfriend a present and 2) getting your ex-boyfriend the worst fucking present. But of course, due to the lack of balls in his pants, he did not ask you.
The crazier notion was, maybe you knew the lack of balls that should be present in his pants, because you iterated for him. “I’m surprised you’re not asking why I’m giving my ex a Disney Princess movie set, Mr. Filmbro.”
That term had him immediately frowning. “I don’t particularly care,” he lied as best as he could. He then crossed his arms. “Plus, I’m afraid the store doesn’t have the sets. I’m gonna have to order them in.”
A tilt of your head. “Are you lying?”
The cross of his arms was gone—now his hands were raised in surrender. “No, no!” At least not the set order bit…
Although it was quite clear that you did not believe him, you spared him this once. “Alright…” you receded your arms from the desk, taking a step back. Instead, you pointed at him. “But don’t think I’m gonna leave you alone on this!”
Vernon’s insanely suave, cool, mystique response was giving you a thumb’s up. “Of course.”
As you walked back to the entrance, hand on the door, you looked back at him. “I’ll see you soon, Mr. Filmbro.”
The eye-twitch was about to come back. He did not bother waving as you left the shop.
VERNON COULD NOT STOP THINKING ABOUT YOU FOR THE SEVEN DAYS BETWEEN YOU AND TODAY.
It was slightly embarrassing—he supposed he should have expected some extraordinary meet-cute, where someone who looked and acted like you would waltz into his dusty-ass film store and ask for possibly the worst movie collection to grace the western cinema.
But then you called him a fucking Filmbro, and now the self-hatred might bubble to the surface of his usual calm demeanour.
The boy scoffed as he fixed the alphabetical order of the CD covers, located in the Classics section. Filmbro…what the fuck do I look like a Filmbro for…
He firstly supposed that he should consider it a compliment—so what if he had superior knowledge of movies over the average morons that wandered into the store? He was paid minimum wage for this knowledge! Fuck, he was doing a degree within this field! (Not that he was quite sure he would end up as a blockbuster director at the fine age of 21, but the arts majors were always told to dream beyond the realistic limits.)
The more he contemplated over the vicious term, the more it began to bother him. Filmbro…Film. Bro. God, it sounded like a classist clique—a club where the members considered themselves above the laws of society, but were horrendously ridiculed by the outsiders. At the end of the day, he had always been an outsider in these clubs—he did not enjoy being the laughing stock, even if it meant being a member of an elitist group.
Whatever. So what if you called him a Filmbro? He had only spoken to you once; the opinion of one girl—regardless of how pretty she was—was not of any relevance to him.
But then you sauntered into his store, and suddenly he forgot that he was seething over you for an entire week.
There you were, footsteps harmonising along the bells of the entrance, and he swerved back to see you. You, in all your frill-skirted, layered-shirted, gum-chewing glory, catching his eye and bringing back the smile which you had offered him the moment you bestowed him that term of little-endearment.
“Hello again, Mr. Filmbro.”
Don’t be a prick, don’t be a prick, don’t be a prick—
It was fine—it was okay. Vernon was a man now—no longer in his teens. He could have a normal, pleasant conversation. He was mature and able enough to interact with a girl who just happened to disagree with him on certain interests.
He would be cordial—kind.
“How can I help you, Miss Disney-Hag?”
His skin nearly crawled. I need to kill myself immediately.
A bit of a low blow from his nickname, but you were laughing, a silly little melody. You must have been crazy, because any other sane, rational human being would have been offended—should have been offended. Vernon fought to keep his face straight.
“I see you’ve been thinking about me then,” you said.
That had him looking away, walking behind the counter. “It’s not everyday I get a grown-ass woman asking me about children’s films.”
You mocked a gasp, slapping a hand over your chest. “Ouch. Do you hurt every girl that walks into your filmstore, or is this special treatment reserved for me?
Vernon focused on the cash in the register. “When another girl asks for the special edition for the Cinderella trilogy, then I’ll hurt her just the same.”
You clicked your tongue. “I should have known all men suck in their own ways.” You then approached the counter, propping your elbows atop the surface. “At least show me you’re good at your job and bring me the movie set I ordered.”
At this precise moment, all the thoughts about your stubborn addiction, playful smirk and how terrible the Little Mermaid was had completely vanished.
Shit.
Maybe his irrational dislike ran further than he thought.
“Yeah…” but then he realised he sounded incredibly suspicious, and cleared his throat, forcing a little assurance in his usual monotone. “Yes! Yeah, of course! The movie set.” He took a step back, nodding his head ever so slowly, as if his head was not churning out a million different plans. “Give me one second…”
“Sure,” you could barely get out before Vernon whirled on his heel, bursting through the backstage door, and into the Chwe flat.
He did not know whether this was going to work out.
Like lightning he ascended the stairs, hands brushing against the bannister as he went past his bedroom, door slightly ajar. Not the destination he was seeking, he stopped before the neighbouring door—this one firmly closed.
The boy made sure to knock first. No answer. Perfect. Slowly turning the knob, he opened the door, peeking around just in case there was someone in the room, and then he would have to resort to more planning. Since the coast was crystal clear, though, he put his mind at ease, only focusing on the main plan.
The room he had entered was a myriad of pop culture references and childhood memories, plastered on the butterfly-covered walls, sitting atop bedside tables or hanging off the hooks. Vernon never realised how invested his sister was with certain TV shows or films till he saw Lindsay Lohan’s mugshot plastered next to her bed. He had asked about it once, but she only waved him off. You wouldn’t understand her impact, she had said to him, and went back to shitting about him to her friends.
Prying away from the poster, his eyes settled on what he came for, settled in the middle of the huge book shelf.
Sofia prided herself with her book and movie collection, a hereditary trait which Vernon shared: the top and bottom shelves were filled with her all-time favourites, even resorting to furthering her obsessions with the merch related to her treasured characters. He remembered laughing at her ideas until he saw a Barbie FunkoPop figure staring back at him one day. That notion was already horrendous, but the black, soulless eyes had guaranteed its spot in his sleep paralysis the next day.
Thankfully, the little horror was not on show on her bookshelf—this time, right in the middle, was the very prize that he sought.
The Disney Princess Movie Set—Complete Edition.
Packaged in pink casing, Sofia’s most treasured piece sat, almost with its head held high as the other movies orbited around its pull. As far as Vernon remembered, it held all the Princess movies, and was worth at least 6 hours of his wages.
The boy looked around the room, as if his sister would appear any second.
Then, like a thief in the night (even though it was broad daylight, and would definitely be caught), he swiped the set off the bookshelf, and hurried out of her room.
“Sorry, Sofe,” he could only murmur under his breath as he dashed down the stairs, hoping you had not been bored by his absence, and left him with stolen goods at the scene of the crime.
He opened the door adjacent to the shop, and he almost sighed in relief when you perked up, eyes darting straight to your apparent order. When he saw your face light up like fireworks in the night sky, he titled his head back a bit, stunned by your boisterous reaction.
“You actually bought it!” you exclaimed, drumming your hands against the counter as he set the movies down. “I had a feeling you would blow me off.”
“Business is business,” Vernon said, crossing his arms, “Shit taste in movies will not stop me from making my money.”
You clicked your tongue. “Spoken like a business major.”
“Film major, thank you. I would rather kill myself than submit to the horrors of finance.”
“Don’t die on me just yet.” Bringing out your purse, you fished through its contents, first setting your card on the counter. Then, you brought out a crumpled piece of paper. “I actually have a few more films I want to ask about.”
The boy was expecting another long list of early 2000s rom-coms—perhaps an opinion for every Disney movie ever made in its existence. He swore if he had to hear about Rachel McAdams’ versatility one more time, he might blow his brains out in front of a customer.
Then you dropped the names, and he had to surge his head forward.
“What are your thoughts on Wolf of Wall Street, American Psycho, Pulp Fiction…Fight Club, Saving Private Ryan, Scarface…” You squinted at the list, finding the names neverending. “Jeez, this list keeps going, huh?”
He could not help the scoff. “And you called me a Filmbro.” He set his forearms on the counter, locking his hands together. “What do you need these movies for?”
“They’re for my ex-boyfriend.”
The term had him pausing. Of course—the ex-boyfriend. How has he heard of this man, but not know a thing about him? Shit, he did not even know your name.
“This ex of yours has…an interesting taste,” he said slowly. “What’s he like?”
“I can tell you he attends the same college as you. Well, us,” you clarified, jerking your head towards the college colours of your server’s hoodie. “Film major. Just like you, actually.”
“Oh?” Small world. “What’s the name?”
“Kim Mingyu. Do you know him?”
Vernon Chwe nearly shit his oversized jeans.
A hesitant nod of his head. “I have a few classes with him.”
“Oh?” Your stare was a little more intense now. “What do you think of him?”
Right.
Another fated question—the people around him had to stop asking him such controversial questions, or else he was bound to piss someone off. You were already letting him off the hook too many times; one more judgemental comment, and he was having that Princess movie set smashed on his head.
Kim Mingyu. Fuckass Kim Mingyu. Film major—just like him. One of the most popular boys in the year—very unlike him. All the teachers love his essays, all the girls love his freakishly-perfect six-pack, which Vernon is extremely irritated (and devastatingly intimidated) by.
What all these people failed to realise, though, was that Mingyu was the biggest piece of shit to grace the halls of his university—and the planet, if dramatics were in order. If you thought that Vernon was a filmbro, then Mingyu was Filmbrother. Filmcomrade. Filmnemesis.
It was as if you could hear the thoughts churning in his head. “You can be honest, you know. He did dump me at the end of the day.” A smirk began to appear. “Say your worst.”
The reassurance did not help. “I mean,” he started, swiping your card, “He’s okay? I haven’t talked to him enough to have an opinion on him.”
A half-truth—that should suffice.
But because the fates like to shit on his head every now and then for kicks, they decided to leave you unsatisfied with his answer. “Or, you can keep lying!”
Excellent intuition, really. “I’m not!” he exclaimed, slapping the card back on the counter. “I really don’t know much about him.”
The big man upstairs was testing him even further, when, with a determined gaze, you set your elbows atop the surface. You leaned closer, tilting your head to the side as you inspected him, and Vernon blinked back at the sheer lack of space you had created. His mouth twisted, eyes frantically darting at the features of your face, not quite taking in the entirety of your being. Your vision seemed to work perfectly, because it caught the slight flush at the tops of his cheeks, where it was just pale skin seconds before.
Your smirk deepened. “Judging by your blush, you’re either terrible at lying…or,” you offered, voice lowering a little as you drummed your fingers against the counter, “You’ve never had a hot girl this close to you.”
Fuck everything and everyone, because that only made him blush more furiously. You could not help the chuckle that escaped, deciding to cease torturing him and take your card. “I’ll not say the answer, Mr. Filmbro, but I think you already know.”
Since he had no plans of turning into a human form of a ketchup bottle, he evaded the topic entirely, instead focusing on interrogating you. “You still haven’t told me how Mingyu is related to the movie list you made.”
That seemed to hold your interest. “Oh, of course!” Putting the list back into your bag, you began, “Well, the list holds my ex-boyfriend’s favourite films. I wanted to know your opinion on a few.”
He could not contain his sigh. Oh, he had an opinion on these films that you mentioned. Again, he would rather be buried with his thoughts on the specific genre than ever tell you. The curiosity, though, was eventually going to eat him alive.
So much for minding his business.
“I mean…” he began to think, trying to find the right words. “I don’t mind them? Godfather is a good film, but I’ve seen better from Brando. I like American Psycho, but again, people tend to miss the point of the movie.”
As you nodded, listening to his two-cents on the movies you mentioned, he paused, furrowing his brows. “Why do you care about my opinion?”
You smacked your lips together, folding the list back. “I don’t know much about you, Mr. Filmbro,” you began, “But you don’t run a filmstore without knowing a thing or two about the films you sell.”
“So?” He crossed his arms atop the counter. “Shouldn’t you have asked the guy who you made the list about?”
“Trust me,” you said, your smirk turning more into a rageful flash of teeth, “I know exactly what he thinks of these films.”
Don’t particularly know what to make of that comment. “Well, I don’t know what my opinion for these films is going to help you in any way.”
“It has helped.” You paused then, waiting to see if he would egg you on, asking how his seemingly tame opinions would play into the grand scheme of things. “All part of my master plan.”
Master plan? Vernon may have been interested before, but he was certain that, before, he could have hid it without letting you catch onto it. In a sudden flash, though, as if his mouth was beyond his control, he regrettably slipped out the words which had you smiling more than he would have liked.
“What master plan?”
He almost closed his eyes. Shit. Now I’m fucking invested.
The corners of your mouth, lifting upwards, had him almost nervous. “I was hoping you would say that.”
Great. Brilliant. Fantastic. Fucking Stupendous. Vernon could not think of other pretentious synonyms. “I will tell you, Mr. Filmbro,” you began, once again settling your locked hands on the counter, “If you help me out with it.”
That had his eyebrow shooting upwards. “What does that mean?”
“Exactly what I intended.” A pause. “Look, I know it’s a little crazy…being asked by someone to help in some mysterious plan. But hey!” you added, “You know who the target is, and you know I can be trusted.”
“Calling your ex-boyfriend a target makes this sound like a contract killing. Also, I actually don’t know that,” he corrected, crossing his arms. “The only thing I know about you is your weird obsession with children’s movies.”
“Well, buddy, that’s basically my entire personality, so you don’t need to know any more!”
Vernon sucked in a breath. “I don’t even know your name.”
Your eyes darted to his features, the sharp brows, the speculative eyes, the flared nostrils. His lips, which were twisted in a curious, bemused line. “That’s an easy problem to solve.” You decided to battle his frown with a smile. “_____.”
_____. At least he knew one important thing about you. He swore Mingyu had mentioned your name before, but then he should not also hold certainty—that boy’s favourite subject had always been himself.
You snapped him out of his thoughts. “This is when you tell me your name now…or do you enjoy being called a filmbro?”
Man…he could not look you in the eye afterwards. “I don’t…” he got out, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “And it’s Vernon. Chwe Vernon.”
“Vernon,” you repeated, lips curling upwards. “Alright, Vernon, since both of us know each other’s names, you can definitely help me now!”
The said-boy tried to smile, which was more a grimace. “Well…”
“Tell you what,” you said, trying to find something in your bag. “Wait, give me a second…shit, where is that piece of paper…?” You finally managed to fish a crumpled piece out. “Right!” After catching sight of a pen lying around the counter, you took it and scribbled something quickly, sending it his way.
Taking it, he looked at the messy scribbles—your number. “You’re looking at it as if I passed you a death threat,” you snickered. Vernon gave an uneasy smile. “Just think it over. I need movie expertise, and there’s no one else I know who can help me more than a guy who runs a film store.”
The boy behind the counter listened to you, paper still in hand. Maybe Mingyu made some points breaking up with you—you did not know who Vernon was, save for the name that was tied to him, and the job he was forced to do by his parents. Realistically, he had to decline, because if he has ever learned something in his life—or from watching a myriad of golden age romantic tragedies—is that you never trust the beautiful, crazy girls.
“Hey,” he heard you say, and he swore your chirp had softened. “I’ll go ahead with my plan in a week’s time. If I don’t hear from you, then I’ll know your answer. You don’t have to tell me now.” When he looked at you, he saw your expression shift. “That’s why I only gave the paper.”
He supposed he could appreciate this sentiment. “Thanks,” he could only say, pocketing your number. “Is there…anything else you want? Aside from the—” a snide glance at the DVD set—”the movie?”
“I saw that,” you scoffed, taking hold of the movie set. “And no, I’m alright. I’ll bother you about children’s movies another time.”
“I’ll make sure these children’s movies are all conveniently sold out when you come,” he countered without thinking.
You could only shake your head, trying to contain your laugh. “Careful, or I just might bother you after the plan.”
Vernon did not know what he felt at that notion—would he want that? However, he did not have time to ponder, since you were already heading for the door. As you nearly left the store, bell ringing, he did not hear the door close. He glanced up, catching you looking at him with an indecipherable expression. “Yes?”
You waited a moment before parting your mouth. “I hope to hear from you, Mr. Filmbro.”
With that, you swiftly exited the store, leaving this Mr. Filmbro even more helpless than he was between the seven days between your first encounter, and now this very second.
“JO MADE SENSE WITH FRIEDRICH AT THE END. SHE SIMPLY…NEEDED A MAN AFTER PINING FOR LAURIE.”
The professor listened in the small circle, the rest of the students typing or writing down the answer. “Like, realistically,” Mingyu went on, twisting his mechanical pencil between his fingers, “The whole point of the movie is her relationship with Laurie, and that was shattered the moment he married Amy. Friedrich was like…” he pouted in thought, furrowing his brows. “The light at the end of the tunnel…does that make sense, Minghao?”
The said-man nodded. “Interesting take,” he noted, walking closer to the circle he was teaching. “So you agree that Jo needed Friedrich at the end of the film?”
“Absolutely.”
There were a few murmurs around the room, majority of them agreeing with the golden boy who was sitting at the head of the circular, white table. Vernon, who was sat one girl away from him, typed furiously in his laptop, adding to his notes. MINGYU IS A FUCKING IDIOT…CINEMATICALLY ILLITERATE…BORDERLINE MISOGYNIST…Okay, perhaps he was exaggerating on the last one, but his analysis of the question pissed him off.
Did Jo need Friedrich at the end of the movie? Was what Professor Minghao had asked them about an hour ago. Vernon knew the answer immediately, and, although did not share it with the seminar, was surprised to be disagreed by the majority of the class. Not surprising, however, when his class was filled with men who could not imagine a woman in a film wanting anything else but a man beside her.
Whatever, he thought, straying from the web page and instead checking the release date for Oppenheimer when he heard your name crop up amongst the discourse in the table.
“Did _____ actually?”
“Oh, yeah, said she thought Jo should have been on her own.” A click of tongue. “Not surprising, coming from her.”
Vernon instantly perked up, fingers pausing on the keyboard. Not surprising? The boy was actually floored at that opinion—and how valid you were for expressing it.
“I mean,” another girl, right next to him, chimed in, “Didn’t you say she was really stupid, Gyu?”
“God, I don’t know where to begin,” Mingyu said, aghast, and the boy who eavesdropped felt a little dread at every word that escaped his mouth. “Everytime I watched a movie with her she always got bored, or argued with me when I tried to explain shit to her.”
“I remember we sat with her while we were tryna do our film project last semester,” the boy beside Mingyu recalled. “She had no fucking clue who Martin Scorcese was, man!”
The group audibly gasped, save for Vernon, who could not help himself, refusing to mind his business. Nasty habit this—he made a note to call you out for this later on, should you walk into his store again.
Fuck. He did not want that. Of course he did not. He should stop thinking about it too.
You, that is.
“She’s gotta be the dumbest one yet, Gyu,” the boy snickered, snapping his laptop shut.
“You don’t even know the half of it,” the dumper groaned, raking through his locks. “You know she was always watching those fucking Disney princess movies?” Vernon’s eyes widened a little. “Man, I remember she wouldn’t get enough of them. Like, what are you, six? Why the fuck am I watching a movie about a midget dragon?”
Then, Mingyu said the words that made the eavesdropper’s spirits shot down.
“_____ may have been hot, but she was one stupid bitch. Thank god I got rid of her.”
The others agreed. He may have spoken more on the matter of your lack of media literacy, but the professor was back, and the seminar had quietened, all in focus.
All except for the boy who had not given his two cents on the matter, frozen solid at the conversation that occurred. What the fuck was that? He had first thought, over and over to the point that he nearly typed it in the seminar document. He had always known Mingyu was an asshole, but what he said about you gave him a very uneasy feeling.
What sent him over the edge was that a lot of his grievances sounded identical to Vernon’s own words.
Miss Disney Hag he had called you—to your face he had insulted your taste in films, and you had only laughed. He wondered how you felt when it was Mingyu amplifying those very opinions on a daily basis.
A frown marred his features. Damn it. He knew he was a loser, but he did not know he was an asshole. Like Mingyu…
Vernon visibly shivered.
As Minghao voiced out the objectives for the second half of the seminar, the boy brought his hand into his trouser pocket, slipping out the paper. He looked over your number, the messy scribbles dancing in his eyes. Darting to his phone on the table, he held it in his free hand, looking over the contacts.
“Damn it,” he said under his breath.
Was he going to regret this? Most probably. Will you probably make him do something that would result in a fatal injury, and land a permanent stain on his social record? One hundred percent.
If he knew these things already, then what he should have done was toss the paper in the nearest bin. What he did instead, as he typed in some vital information in his phone, was something that changed his life (or at least the life he will live for the next few weeks).
vernon: u dont have to wait till next week
vernon: ill help u with the plan
There. And now, he shall wait.
Which, he pondered as he saw the immediate response, was not very long.
normal disney enjoyer: wait who tf is this??
Oops.
vernon: oh mb this is vernon lmao
vernon: from the filmstore
normal disney enjoyer: oh damn why didn’t u say so !! freaky ass text
vernon: ??? ive said it now tf
normal disney enjoyer: and im happy u have ;)
Well. Vernon sighed a little, trying to focus back on his work, but to no avail.
Let’s see what you have in store for the next week.
VERNON WAS WONDERING WHETHER HE STILL HAD TIME TO KILL HIMSELF.
It could be quick—maybe if he jumped in front of the next incoming car, full speed, he might suffer a haemorrhage in his brain, and die bleeding out as his parents took him to the hospital. Of course, that does mean that it would be slow and excruciating, but he thought that nothing would be as painful as whatever you had planned for him.
Come on…maybe it won’t be that bad. Perhaps his thoughts were spiralling too quickly. Perhaps his assumptions of you were a stretch, and that all this anxiousness, pent up in him, would wash away the moment he saw your car pulling up to the store’s driveway.
He felt himself prepare mentally as, eventually, your small, red car slowed in front of him. Right before him, he saw the passenger window roll down, and he caught sight of your smiling face, teeth showing.
Perhaps it truly would not be as bad as he imagined.
“Get in loser, we’re going trespassing.”
Nevermind.
“Oh my God,” was the unsatisfying answer to your perfect reference. Seriously, you should not bother saving your precious material on such a lame boy, but there was something so exciting about his eyes sharply rolling, colour staining the tops of his cheeks. “I’m not doing this if you’re going to quote terrible movies the entire night.”
“First of all, fuck you. Mean Girls birthed half of your customers.” You flicked the lock on the passenger door, pushing it open. “Second, you don’t have a choice. You’ve agreed to ruin Mingyu’s life.”
“First of all yourself, I did not agree to that.” Begrudgingly, he settled shotgun, snapping the car door shut. “Second, Mean Girls was a waste of Rachel McAdams’ talent.”
You scoffed, starting the car. “I don’t take opinions from men who can’t drive.”
This shut the boy up nicely, clamping his lips together in quiet shame. He wished he could argue with that—you, he feared, had a good point. Despite that, it was not his fault that his parents insisted on the reliance of public transport; the bus was his greatest villain—aside from the middle school kids in his store that always ask for the next FIFA game.
You could not help taking a second glance at him, chuckling at his defeat. “Don’t be sad, Mr. FIlmbro,” you reassured him, changing gears. “I like my men a little pathetic.”
That did not help at all—his eyes widened, gawking at you, but you were already looking ahead, pressing your foot on the accelerator.
“Jesus!” he exclaimed as he held onto his seat, taken aback by your sudden rush of speed. “I thought you wanted to kill Mingyu, not yourself!”
“My bad,” you only said, turning right. “I’m just so excited! You know, getting there.”
“I can see that,” he mumbled, looking away from you into the back. Strapped in with the seatbelt, bizarrely, was Sofia’s Disney Princess Set, as if the dozen-movie box was a toddler in need of extra assistance. What the fuck…?
“I’m having these films in pristine condition, Vernon,” you explained, though it still made no sense in his head. “You understand, don’t you?”
Of course not. “Sure.”
He waited for further explanation, which, as the silence continued, you decided to throw him the conversational bone. “I don’t just carry the set around with me, you know.”
Sure. “Of course not.”
“It’s relevant to today’s plan,” was all you would offer, speeding more to reach the destination quicker. Vernon held onto the belt a little tighter, still eyeing the movie set rather suspiciously before focusing back on the road.
The drive was not long—perhaps thirty minutes at most—but he knew he was leaving the rougher parts of the city when nicer neighbourhoods welcomed his vision, the litter on the roads disappearing, instead trees in an orderly line painting the sides of the pavement. The further you drove into these suburbs, the more he was surprised at the sheer luxury of the exterior of these houses; granted, he did not originate from poverty, but his idea of a holiday was three days in the comforts of his bed, bingeing the Miyazaki collection with a lifetime supply of mint chocolate chip ice cream on his lap.
Vernon had to save his mouth dropping to the seat of the car floor when they rolled into the Kim household’s drive.
He was aware that Mingyu derived from wealth—the former could not help noticing his pricey, flashy brands every time the taller boy sauntered into the Film Sound classes, but he did not expect this Bridgerton-ass looking house, nestled in between the other million-dollar homes in the neighbourhood. He was greeted with a clearer picture the closer you parked in their drive, surprisingly empty; it was around that moment that you noticed that all the lights were turned off in the house, almost a haunting image.
The boy was on his way to make a comment about your terrible spying skills when you rebuffed him immediately, saying, “I know what you’re thinking. I have it covered.”
“Please tell me, Miss Bond, how are you planning to carry this out?”
You offered him an incredulous look. “I don’t know what that reference means, I’m too pretty.”
His answer to that was a thin, long line of his mouth. You chose to ignore it completely. “Mingyu’s parents are out of town right now, and his sister’s on a ski-trip in Austria.”
A glance of confusion. “In the middle of March?”
A shrug. “You know what rich people are like.” Weirdly enough, he knew exactly what you were talking about. “But it worked out great for us.” With a hard exhale you got out of the car, the boy beside you reflecting your actions. “All the easier for what we have to do.” You opened the car door behind the driver’s one, unstrapping the seatbelt and carefully bringing out the movie set.
“How’re we getting into the evil lair, then?” he asked dryly, crossing both his arms. “I assume the millionaires don’t happen to put a spare key under the carpet?”
“Imagine,” you said, sighing melodramatically. “I tried making them do it so I could sneak into his house, but for some reason, Mingyu never agreed to it.”
“I wonder why,” he muttered.
“Worry not, young grasshopper!” You strolled to the very right of the house, where a thin wooden door was almost hidden from view. “Where there is a door closed, another is mysteriously open.”
With a hard push, the door trudged back, swinging heavily away. He stared at it, not quite believing how someone can be so careless to keep their gates unlocked. “Another weakness of Mingyu’s—” You pointed at the cleared path into the house—”whenever he leaves from the garden, he never locks the gate.”
Vernon could not quite believe it. “Either the wealthy are incredibly secured in their safety, or stupid as fuck.”
“I think you know the answer to that,” you joked, going further into the journey, ushering him over. Like a siren calling his name, he followed you, unaware of the shit you might be getting him into.
Into the fancy garden they arrived, clean-cut hedges bordering in dozens of flower bushes, peppered also with a few fruit trees—berries of every kind ripening on the green. While Vernon admired the natural luxury, you hurried to the nearby shed, where a ladder was situated right beside it. “Quick, help me out here!” you shouted in a whisper, ushering him over. Dropping the DVD set for a moment, you grunted as you held the large ladder up with his assistance, slowly making its way to the brick wall of the house. “Wait, line it up against that window over there,” you instructed, jerking your head towards the far right window, no doubt on the second floor. Once the ladder was lined up properly, you moved the boy out of the way, shaking the rails to make sure it stayed put.
“I can’t believe we’re actually doing this,” Vernon muttered, watching you take the Disney Princess set in one hand, the other making the first step on the calendar. “We can still…you know, not commit breaking and entering.”
“You can happily leave, Mr. Filmbro,” you offered, looking up at your destination.
That had him scoffing. “My ass is not walking two hours back to my house.”
“That seems more like a you problem then!” you chirped. “Now are you following me up, or pussying out?”
Once again, pussying out seemed like the obvious choice for the boy. He was not made for missions such as these—he was merely meant to watch other people act out said missions in front of his television. Unfortunately, because he was too far away from the film store, it was either sitting it out, waiting for you to come out and do something diabolical, or at least watch over you should you cross a line (if the latter were the case, then Vernon had already failed).
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he kept uttering like a mantra, waiting for you to climb up enough to hold onto the ladder as he began to follow after you. He made the mistake of looking up as you climbed up, and he got a full, HD view of your ass. He tried his very best to look away out of some semblance of respect, but you also made the mindful decision of wearing the shortest skirt known to man. His fuck, fuck fucks! rang louder, causing you to shush him.
“Stop freaking out, my guy!” you called out, right on the top of the ladder. “I know my ass is crazy built but this is not the time.”
“That’s not why I’m freaking out, _____!” he countered, but knowing you, you did not care for his explanations. He only waited as you pushed open the slight-open window, all the way to the top before climbing inside.
As he reached the top of the ladder, he watched you dust yourself before glancing back at him, ushering him inside. “Here goes nothing,” he said to himself, hands on the top of the window ledge as he put his foot on the sill, pushing himself inside.
Vernon dropped into the unknown room, an oof! leaving his mouth as he landed rather ungraciously on his feet. Quickly, he looked up, surroundings rather dimmed due to the lack of lighting. Still, with the help of the moonlight, he could slowly make out the huge smart TV in the middle of the bedroom, beneath it a wide shelf filled with DVDs, some opened and scattered on the carpeted floor. The bed was on the opposite side, right next to the window the two of you had entered in, black and gold sheets tousled and unmade.
As you turned the light on, the boy then made out that Mingyu, in fact, did not have a bed frame, but just a mattress, with the sheets barely done properly. The wall on his left was a full black-shutter closet, where he could see the collection of his designer clothing behind the gaps. Posters were plastered on the rest of the walls, most of them being the Tarantino classics —a reclined, raven-bobbed Uma Thurman watching him with bedroom eyes being the most prominent—with certain papers of autographs also stuck next to the posters. There was another poster—American Beauty and the girl surrounded with rose petals—which had him quickly looking away.
“Jesus,” was all he could say, but he supposed he should not have judged. He himself had only his posters in his room—except he did not have the same taste as a middle-aged incel.
“I know.” You looked around at the familiar space, and the memories you had made here. “Imagine having sex in this hellsite.”
Then the image of you having sex with Mingyu on that messy bed came into his mind, and Vernon could have combusted then and there. “I can’t imagine,” he mumbled out, walking to the door, opening to make sure no one was inside. “_____, are you sure no one’s here?”
“Swear on my life, Mr. Filmbro.”
He had to trust you now—or you had very little respect for your life.
He kept eyeing the DVD set you had in your hand. “Are you still not gonna tell me what we’re doing with that?”
You marched over to the shelf beneath the TV, settling yourself down. “Come here and I’ll show you.” You patted the empty carpet space next to you for added emphasis.
Hesitantly, he obliged, sitting cross-legged next to you. Finger pointing as it scoured the shelf, you carefully brought out one of the films from Mingyu’s selection, all the while sliding out a Disney film from your own set. “Now, tell me,” you began, as you showed him the two movies. “Do you think The Dark Knight and Mulan are a good match?”
First pulling a face at the choice, he then resorted to keeping his twist of features as he turned to you. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“So like, you know Mulan is a woman disguising herself as a soldier in order to defeat the Huns and save her father’s honour, right,” you explained, though you had a small feeling he was not particularly listening. “And Batman is the same thing, except he dresses up as a fucking bat…stupid furry.”
Vernon could not understand how you compared one of the most beautiful, nuanced depictions of a broken, three-dimensional superhero into a furry, but he needed to get to the bottom of your plan, once and for all. “No, I mean, what are you doing? Why the hell are we here?”
You tutted extra loud. “I’m gonna swap the CDs, dumbass!” You held up the princess movie. “Thought Mingyu could say to me that Disney princess movies sucked, huh?” Then, the classic DVD’s turn to rise. “Let’s see how he’ll like watching a talking dragon in China instead of a talking bat in Fantasyland!”
The boy could only watch, shock growing with the successful swap of the movies, the secret Mulan CD safely tucked into the The Dark Knight’s DVD case. “It’s Gotham, actually,” he murmured, but he knew you were not listening. “Wait, _____, we really just snuck into your ex’s house to swap a few movies?”
You looked up briefly as you began opening another DVD case. “I mean, if you want to trash the place, that’s fine, but you can’t do anymore than what Mingyu’s dirty ass hasn’t done already.”
Fair point. “I think you’re going insane. Like, clinically.” He kept looking at the door, which was closed shut. “He’ll kill us if he catches us.”
“Forget about us, you’re barely doing anything!” you exclaimed, tossing some of Mingyu’s movies to him. “Can you actually help me instead of complaining?”
What he should have done was argue with you properly, perhaps even make his escape and leave you to dig your own grave. Sure, he could not drive, but was it not just three pedals, a wheel and a dream? He could have left, never to see you again.
But then his eyes wandered to the Inception DVD scattered beside you, no doubt collateral damage as you took out the other Nolan films, and saw a Disney Princess movie sitting beside it. Sleeping Beauty, it read out, with the picture of some skinny blonde chick slumbering with a man overlooking her. He thought it a bit strange, almost creepy how this brunette was watching her.
And then an idea came into his head.
He closed his eyes for a fleeting moment, clamping his lips together. Please forgive me, Mr. Nolan, for what I’m about to do.
Hand reaching out to grasp both DVDs, he opened one of his favourites, unclipping the CD. You glanced at him, swapping the movies around. You could not help your stare lingering a little, watching his lips pout, brows furrowed as he fixed the new CD in the Nolan set, as if the task was a serious one. Well, it was a serious task for you, but you expected more complaining.
When he looked up, he managed to catch a small smile on your lips before he quickly looked away. “And now you’re slacking,” he accused, closing the DVD and setting it atop the newly improved.
“What’s the plot for Inception?” you asked him, cracking open The Princess and The Frog.
“I thought you knew, since you laughed at me for saying it was my favourite.”
“I don’t know the full thing,” you admitted. “The only reason I knew about it was because Mingyu never shut up about it…sorry about that, by the way.”
Vernon sighed. “It’s fine…if I made fun of your Disney favourites, then bullying me for Nolan isn’t the worst…I think.” He looked at your new suggestion before picking out Alien from Mingyu’s selection. “A thief has to implant an idea into this powerful guy’s mind, and he does this through infiltrating other people’s dreams. However, he has to be asleep while he does it.”
As you began to laugh, he threw you an irritated look. You shook your head, unable to erase your smile. “That’s a really good match.”
His eyes widened for a moment, mouth parting. For a moment (and he did not know whether he was going to regret making this assertion), he did not care for Christopher Nolan’s disrespect, after seeing your reaction.
With that, the two of you sat in near silence, the crisp opening and closing of the DVDs, the sliding of the discs being the only sound between the two of you. The Princess of the Frog was successfully matched with the Alien—you, unsurprisingly, had not watched the movie, but Vernon had watched both (one against his will, which you could guess), and thought it the best match. Brave was slotted into The Revenant's case, while Beauty and the Beast went straight into Pan’s Labyrinth’s.
“Okay so…” the boy held up the Pocahontas CD. “Native American princess falls for the coloniser? How the fuck are you defending this?”
You could only offer a sheepish smile. “The soundtrack is really good?”
“Knowing Disney,” he crowed, cracking open the DVD, “They probably have a song on how terrible the poor Natives are.”
You eyed him, surprised. “How the hell did you guess that?”
First, Vernon made a face, as if he himself could not believe his excellent intuition. Then, he only laughed a little, taking out the Dances with Wolves DVD from the shelf. “I’ve watched enough Disney movies with my sister to know how they work.”
“Oh, so you have watched them?” you mused, watching him exchange the discs. “All that time I thought you only watched what Mingyu watched.”
“No, I watch foreign indie films like an asshole,” he clarified, shutting the cases, and putting Dances with Wolves back on the shelf. “The thing is, I still have my grievances against the super popular films. You know the list you mentioned to me the other day?” You nodded. “Most of these film junkies get off on those movies. I’ll admit I like them, but I’ve seen so much better.”
You snorted. “Like Inception?” Vernon watched you for a moment, biting the inside of his cheek. “What? You asked him, tilting your head.
He followed your movement—he too, craned his head, his brown curls cascading along his forehead. “Like Inception…and better.”
“Better?” you gasped out, fingers rising to your bottom lip in shock. “Does Mr. Filmbro prefer a movie over Nolan’s grand—no, best release ever?!”
“Ha, ha,” he monotoned, only adding to your amusement. “It’s still his best film! But,” he added, shrugging a little, “I may or may not have lied to you the first time we met. Inception’s not my favourite movie.”
“What?!” you could barely contain your grin. “Oh my God, if I find out it’s a fucking Disney movie, I’m never letting you live it down!”
“Let’s not go that far,” he jeered, earning a harsh nudge of your elbow. “Hey! You should be thanking me for my honesty.”
“How about you extend that honesty and tell me which movie is your favourite?”
Vernon mocked a ponder. “It’s a hard pass.”
“Come on!” you pressed, scooting a little closer, almost reaching out as if to nudge him some more. “You’ve already committed a felony with me. Telling me your favourite movie is naturally the next step.”
“Because that’s obviously how normal human interaction goes,” he countered, sarcasm clear in his voice.
“Tell me.”
“No.”
“Tell me!”
“Hmm…no!” he repeated, assembling the last of the DVDs. “Maybe if we raid Mingyu’s house next time.”
“Oh?” Leaning closer, you paused his hands on the movie sets. “Do you want there to be a next time?”
It was then Vernon realised the implications of your question, a consequence of his own suggestion. It was almost comical, how his eyes widened like full moons, and he immediately shook his head. “Now you know that’s not what I meant.”
“Then what did you mean?” you asked him, and the way he exposed a slight stutter at your question had you laughing. “Would you want to see me again?”
What Vernon wanted to tell you was no, no, no, because another second with you would end with all the blood in his system rushing to his head, and other places. Damn everything and everyone, he would want to see you again—no. No. He wouldn’t. He would not.
“You haven’t answered the question,” you said, snapping him out of his thoughts.
The boy was about to stutter out an answer when the two of you heard a door slam downstairs.
You whirled back, eyes instantly darting to the door. They then focused back on you, widened very much like his not long ago. “_____,” Vernon muttered.
“Mr. Filmbro…”
The furrow of his brow appeared for a split-second before it disappeared at the shuffling underneath. “What the fuck do we do?” he gulped out, looking around to find anywhere to escape from. This was it—he thought he was getting away with trespassing just because you had convinced him to, but that fuckass ex-boyfriend was going to catch them in his bedroom, two inches away from kissing you, and—
“Wait,” you then said, catching his wrist in your hand. He barely had time to react to it before you shot up from your seated position, hauling the boy along with you. He stumbled, but then you nearly made him fall flat on his face as you ran to the shutter closets, sliding them straight open. The inside was a mess of branded clothing and boxes of sports equipment, but there was one opening with just enough for two people in trouble to hide.
You first went in, and, with a harsh tug, pulled him in with you. He crashed into you, but you had enough control to slide the shutter door shut. There was so much commotion that when you both finally stilled, breathing harshly as you heard Mingyu enter the room, Vernon blinked back to see your face about two inches away from him.
He was going to yelp—strong on going to, because you sensed his incoming shock, and smacked your hand against his mouth. His eyebrows could have touched the top of his forehead, but what you noticed the most was the warmth of his skin, burning the longer your touch lingered on his lips.
The smile you offered him as you put a finger to your lips had him almost passing out.
“Yeah, man, come round whenever,” was all Vernon could hear, still not comprehending Mingyu’s speech due to your hand. “No, Minseo’s not here, what the fuck? Why do you wanna know where my sister is?”
Slowly, ever so carefully as not to alert him, you pulled down on one of the blinds of the shutter, spying the movie which he was about to see. Vernon should have been following your movements, but he could only sense you, inching closer and closer to him till you were pressed against him. Of course, you were only trying to better your vision of your ex-boyfriend, but the boy beside you could not focus. The hand on his mouth—God—he needed, so badly, to be put down. Your fingers were soft, and although his lips could not help brushing against your palm, everything in him resisted the urge to react.
Quickly glancing at your accomplice in glee, you dropped your hand from his mouth, silently urging him to watch. He could have rebelled against your pulling away, but he instead obliged. Bringing his face next to yours, he glanced at you one last time before peering at the vision that welcomed.
There he was, the golden boy, raking his hair as he strolled into the middle of the room, observing the TV before him, and the DVD player sitting at the bottom. He kept humming, as if agreeing with whoever was on the phone. “Yeah, yeah, I’ll go to that party later…no, I’m not bringing _____! You know about that already!”
The boy in hiding quickly snuck a peek at you, who soured a little at the mention. “Hmm? Yeah, whatever. What? Nah, I’m just gonna watch a chill movie before leaving.” Mingyu scanned the films on his shelf. Walking over, he leaned down, sliding out The Shape of Water from his collection, cradling his phone between his shoulder blade and his craned head as he opened the DVD.
Vernon could not help pulling a face at Mingyu’s choice of a ‘chill movie’ being a film about a mute woman wanting to fuck a water creature. You probably did not understand the reference, but by the growing anticipation on your face, you only cared about the scene you two had created, and was about to unfold just then.
Mingyu slid the CD into the player, pressing play as he made his way to his frameless bed, settling down in the sheets. “Yeah…no, no, it’s just starting.”
The two of you could hear clearly the opening credits, which began with the most obnoxious opening music of Disney’s intro. Vernon was taken aback by how Mingyu did not realise it from that very moment, but considering he was too busy chatting pure shit on the phone, laughing to himself, the boy assumed he was simply waiting for the action to occur.
“Any minute now, Mr. Filmbro,” you whispered, oh-so-fucking close to him. He did not respond, merely a nod.
Craning his head to see through the shutters, he noticed the animation come to life, the ship within dangerous waters sailing with uncertainty. He snuck a quick glance at Mingyu’s face, which started garnering a little confusion.
“Are these extra credit scenes? I don’t remember any of this,” he heard the OG filmbro complain.
You could not help the snort that escaped you. Vernon glared at you, but with little effect. “What?” you whispered. “I don’t remember him being this thick.”
“What the fuck is this cartoon…” the two of you heard Mingyu pipe up. Finally, the buffoon is realising this is not the two-time Oscar winning animation, but the four-time Oscar winning CGI. “This wasn’t in the director’s cut.”
You still could not believe how your ex-boyfriend was taking this long for the realisation to hit. Even when Eric jumped up on the screen, holding onto the ship’s ropes, the watcher only regarded the character intently, as if he was somehow part of the stranger film.
Only when, fifteen minutes in, Atlantis is finally introduced that something clicked in his brain. Mingyu tilted his head, thinking out loud. “What the fuck…?”
Getting up from where he sat, he ended the call, informing whoever was on the other side that he would meet later. He took out the CD from the player, examining its exterior. “Can’t see shit on this CD…” He was not wrong—you were smart, choosing the discs which did not have any images, confusing the boy all the more. “Maybe I put in the wrong one…”
He shrugged it off, taking out The Dark Knight instead, another easy, breezy movie to watch when The Shape of Water did not pull through. Now Nolan was a hard one to criticise—Vernon himself was a huge fan, but seeing Mingyu try to watch it irked him. A good thing, then, was it not, that he was bound for a second surprise?
Repeating the routine, he slid the secret CD, settling back into his frameless bed. “Great minds, huh?” you whispered to him, and Vernon only rolled his eyes, not enjoying the dig against him in the slightest.
“You dated him,” he griped, watching the movie start up.
“Waste of good looks,” you whispered, your partner-in-crime nodding in agreement. The movie beginning had you both falling silent as a bird of prey hits on one of the soldier’s heads. The scene is set in the cold mountains of China, but the sole audience does not catch it immediately.
“So fucking weird…” Mingyu trailed off again, leaning forwards. “This isn’t the robbery scene…”
Of course it was not—the idiot would not witness one of the best film openings in Vernon’s humble opinion. He would not feast his eyes to the workings of Joker’s bank robbery, nor the cold one-liners from the incapacitated bank manager.
No, what he was served was the Huns crossing the Northern border, which, as the boy finally began to clock after a good ten minutes, was not what he was expecting.
“What the…” once again, he heaved himself up, walking over to the player. “Now I know something’s wrong…”
Both you and Vernon stretched further close, as much as the closet would allow, to peek at Mingyu’s frustration as he brought the CD out once more, examining the back and front. He then took out some more of his favourites, opening their cases and taking out the CDs, observing them closely. He was suspicious now. How could he not be, when he was expecting incel excellence, but was greeted with the same shit his younger sister—his crazy ex-girlfriend, even—would usually watch.
He blinked back.
His deathly stillness had the two trespassers pausing. You two looked at each other, faces losing any humour, perhaps recognising that he had clocked on. You watched the scene as Mingyu rapidly added one CD after another, expecting one movie only to have a Disney-fied replacement, completely botching his plans. Every movie that received such Disneyfication further enraged him, the grit in his teeth heard, the tick in his jaw visible.
The final straw was when the Godfather was slotted in, his all-time, unmatched favourite. There was darkness for the first few minutes, and he sighed too quickly in relief, about to lay back on his mattress.
Then, a curly-haired girl, a toddler at best, in huge green glasses becomes visible, being told to open her eyes.
“Is this where magic comes from?”
“What the fuck?!”
And as a conversation between the little girl and her elderly grandmother blossomed, there was a specific dialogue which sent the young boy over the edge.
“This candle became a magical flame that would never grow out…and it blessed us with a refuge in which to live…a place of wonder…An Encanto.”
You nearly burst out laughing.
Mingyu, on the other hand, could have seen red.
“Who fucked with my CDs?!” he demanded to no one in particular, though in his mind he knew there was a culprit. “My fucking CDs, man!”
“Did you do the Godfather swap?” you whispered, barely able to contain yourself.
“Two special families with one heir that doesn’t feel connected to their lifestyle.” Vernon grinned at you, impressed with himself. “It was too easy.”
“Where did you even find the Encanto DVD? It wasn’t in our set.”
“I found it in his little filmbro shelf.” He ticked his head towards the boy in physical agony. “My guess is that his sister is a Disney fan and left it in his mancave.”
“Oh my God,” you got out, watching the melodramatic scene of your dear ex show rage akin to a teenage boy losing Call of Duty online.
“That fucking bitch,” he guttered, over and over again as he threw the Encanto CD across the room. Those words came out, and the boy behind the shutters stiffened. Okay—there is rage, and then there is straight up promise of violence. Vernon may not be much of a knight, but if they were caught, he knew he would have to protect you.
He hoped to everything that existed that it would not have to come to that—Vernon would rather fake having a heart attack and have you drag his body out of the Kim Manor.
It seemed as that might have been a real possibility, until the boy called out a threat to a name they were not expecting.
“Minseo, I’m gonna kill you!” Mingyu roared as he stormed out of the room, undoubtedly on his way to destroy her room, even take his anger out on her Jellycat collection.
As you heard his frenzy disappear down the halls, the trespassers took this as the opportunity to escape the closet, Vernon already creating a little distance in case you come too close and cause his passing out.
“We need to get out now,” he declared as you crept out of the wardrobe, his head whipping to the door which Mingyu left from.
You nodded, not quite looking at him as you dashed straight for the final DVD. “Oh, Jesus,” He groaned, watching you scramble for the movie, trying horrifically to hide it within your clothes. “You do realise he can come in any second!”
“Okay, okay,” you said, hurrying over to the window. “Wait, you can go first.”
Vernon raised a brow, following after you. “How come you don’t want to go first?”
You only ushered him further, grinning. “You can peek at my ass again.”
“My eyes will be closed,” he sniped, already carrying it out, trying his absolute best not to imagine your ass in his mind—maybe stakeouts for goofy purposes were not for the weak-willed. “You know, just for that alone, you’re going down first.”
“Whatever suits you, Mr. Filmbro,” you almost chanted, aggravating him all the more as you stepped out of the window, beginning the trek down.
He looked down as you descended with one film in hand, still stealing glances at the only door in the room, terrified that the boy would burst through the door, see you both and bring about his downfall. Subconsciously, his fingers hovered just before his mouth, biting the skin around his nails. He knew he should have run himself over with an oncoming vehicle. A messy plan, but still fool-proof.
“Stop panicking and come down here!” your voice snapped him out of his anxious frenzy. “I know you’re biting your nails off right now!”
The boy instantly repelled his hand, instead furrowing his brow. A little irritating—scary, as well, really—how predictable he was in your eyes. How quickly you had figured him out.
“Alright,” he said, absent-mindedly as he reached for the windowsill. He peaked down again, not realising how far down the descent truly was. Rationally, he knew it was not the worst drop he’d seen on the first floor, but the nerves had started affecting his mind. Now, this entire time he was watching you take one step, two steps down, but he did not have the strength to follow you.
Still, he knew it was now or never.
Vernon was going to be at your heels (or, more anatomically correct, at your head) when he heard a shuffle from behind him.
He whipped his head around, anticipating the worst.
The worst arrived in all his golden-skinned, empty-headed glory. Holding one of his DVDs, Kim Mingyu stood at the doorway, his eyes widening with every second they beheld the intruder, one leg out of the house, the other a moment away from heaving him up.
Oh. Jesus. Christ.
“The nerd from film theory?”
Vernon’s face dropped.
The Nerd from Film Theory? The Nerd from fucking Film Theory?
It was then and there, in that exact moment of time, that the filmbro in question did not give a single care for what the popular boy thought of him. Vernon knew everything about this boy (whether he wanted to or not); his every class, his every terrible friend, even his film preferences, thanks to yours truly. Yet Mingyu did not even know his name—did not even bother to remember.
It was because of that that he managed to garner some essence of his bravado, finally settling both feet on the ladder steps.
He also decided to add in some corrections to Mingyu’s knowledge.
“Jo March did not need any man after Laurie…in fact, she did not need any male support, asshole.”
For added effect, he raised his middle finger, as if the burn was sick enough to hurt.
Mingyu’s devastating response was a confused tilt of his head, clearly not understanding his reference.
It was enough time for Vernon to hurry his descent down, catching the former more off guard.
“What the fuck—” was all the boy heard before he quickly tried to travel downwards, feet nearly slipping on the steps by his sheer carelessness. Mingyu’s head popped out from the window, and saw the great ladder leaning against the sill, shocked gaze lowering to where Vernon was descending to.
When his eyes found yours, he could have choked on his gulp. Even more so when you smirked at him.
“_____?”
As Vernon finally dropped off the ladder, dusting himself off, he watched the two of you, staring each other down. When he gauged Mingyu’s fear of you, there was a small part of him that was filled with admiration.
Mingyu’s demand sounded more like a whimper. “What are you doing here?”
You only curled your lips further upwards, grinning like a wild animal. It chilled your ex-boyfriend to the bone when you held the Tangled CD up for him to see, with your other hand raising your middle finger.
“This is for calling me a stupid bitch.”
His mouth dropped open. That gave you just enough time to grab onto Vernon’s hand, enveloping your fingers around his wrist.
And run for your life.
Vernon let out a yelp as he was yanked forward by your hold, barely hearing Mingyu’s loud curses and retreating back into the house, no doubt to follow after you two—the trespasser could only guess, much too occupied by your hand, a guiding beacon of mischief, never absent in his life as you ran and ran and ran out of the garden, out of the sleek maze which you two first entered, catching sight of the open garden gate.
The boy heard distant footsteps coming from the house, and as you both saw your car parked beyond the greater gates, you fished out your keys, finally letting go of his hand to dash over to the driver’s side, jamming the key in the lock. Vernon let out a startled noise as the car unlocked, wasting no time to jump inside, heart beating loud enough for the entire neighbourhood to hear. Mingyu appeared at the main doorstep at the exact same time, even more shocked to realise he had not noticed his ex-girlfriend’s car casually parked before him.
Just as you climbed inside, swivelling the keys into ignition, Mingyu began to run after the car, a mere ten seconds between him and catching you two.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, _____, just start it already!” the nervous boy in shotgun begged, his head swivelling back at every chance, heart lurching at every metre closer the filmnemesis crept.
The car revved to life at your signal.
It was time to get the fuck out of here.
“GO, GO, GO!” Vernon screamed at the top of his voice, fisting the handle at the roof of the car as you slammed on the accelerator, racing out of the driveway with Mingyu’s bellowing following after you. Of course, since he was a mere, enraged college student, and you both were in a (slight) state-of-the-art vehicle, you zoomed out of the neighbourhood, his curses fading with every turn further out, you managing to escape.
Vernon, because he had never done such a thing before, was still screaming to leave for the next ten minutes until you had had enough, swerving to the side of the road, not far from his DVD store. You almost crashed into the nearby park, frightening a few birds that expected peace within the sidewalk trees, only to be disturbed by a troublesome ex and a film-obsessed loser.
You gushed out an exhale, fingers gripping tightly to the wheel, almost as stunned as the boy beside you, who seemed to take in the town’s worth of air in his little body. But then, you realised the gravity of the situation, the sole movie at the back which could not be swapped, and the valiant escape from something you never thought you would come out of alive.
Just then, you burst into laughter.
The boy whirled his head to you, who could not stop the tumbles of laughter that escaped your mouth, hanging on to the car wheel as you cackled and cackled like the Wicked Witch of the West. Well, that was what you thought you sounded at that time, but you, as always, did not care.
Only that you were wrong—at least in Vernon’s eyes. You were wrong, because if you were laughing like some Disney villain, then he would have been more pissed off—enraged even. He was instead in awe, shocked at the raw guffawing that spluttered out of you without shame. Had the two of you not evaded a great danger? Nearly been arrested for your legally ambiguous behaviour?
For the first time in his life, he was not embroiled with dread.
There was no anxiety in his body, no essence of panic at the consequences of your actions. No, he could only stare at you and your mirth, and find himself raising his brows, the beginnings of a scoffed laugh creeping from his lips.
The more he looked at you, the more his own laughter joined yours.
And then you were both laughing, giggling beyond control at the narrow escape, and the near crash against some tree. Vernon knew how stupid this whole situation was, but strangely, he did not seem to care—not when you did not see it like that. A very odd prospect.
After a few minutes, when it finally seemed as if you would settle down, you sighed, leaning back into the driver’s seat. “We should do that again.”
Despite the amusement lingering, he immediately shut the idea down. “Not a chance.”
You admired the ancient lining of the tree’s bark in front of the car. “The way you were laughing with me just now, you’d think you want to commit crimes from now on.”
A dramatic roll of eyes. “I’m not going to jail. They don’t even have a TV there.”
“You and your fuck ass movie collection…”
That brought out another chuckle from the boy—you smiled at the notion. He then looked at the rearview mirror, where the last movie was splayed, all alone and away from the others. “Kind of a shame we missed out on one last movie.”
“Right?” You followed his line of sight. “Fuck, Tangled of all movies?”
“Wait, isn’t that the one with Rapunzel?”
You let out an impressed hum. “A week of seeing my face, and you’re already catching on!” A mischievous raise of brows. “Another month with me and you can sing all the tracks from the film.”
“You really shouldn’t have this much faith in me, _____,” he said, shaking his head. “Plus, this might be the one movie I didn’t watch with Sofe.” He saw you perk up at the new name. “My sister. She’s the one who forced me to watch all those Disney films years ago.”
“I like her already,” you mused, a finger on your chin. You paused for a bit, looking down at your shoes, settled lightly upon the pedals. Then, you started the engine once more. “So…Tangled is the only one you haven’t watched, huh.”
A glance at you. “Yep.”
You looked back, hoping to reverse away from the tree. “Right…” You checked your watch, the car slowly moving out of the pavement. “Interesting…super duper interesting.”
It was something insane, fantastical the way Vernon’s nerves seemed to hum at the implications. “I don’t like where this is going.”
“What? I just said that it’s interesting you’ve never watched Tangled…”
The boy scoffed, crossing his arms. “This is where you’re gonna force me to watch the stupid movie.”
But then he caught the look of surprise on your face, as if you had been caught. “Oh, Jesus, you’re not gonna let me out the car, are you?”
“No, no!” you countered at once, raising your hands. “Well, yes as in I was hoping you would watch the movie with me, and no, I won’t force you.” You sighed a little, fingers back on the wheel. “You’ve already done so much today. If you want to go home, I’ll drive you straight there.”
He watched your expression, the prepared acceptance, the anticipation—the sliver of hope, hiding itself amongst the flurry of other emotions. In all honesty, he was tired; the entirety of this evening had exhausted his social battery (which he doubted he had to begin with) and he still had some sound image work left back at the college studio. If it was any other person asking, he would have happily bunked them off—pretended that he had suddenly developed a terminal illness in the span of minutes, and begged them to drive him back home to ‘live out the rest of his days’.
You, on the other hand, were a problem. He could not let you down—not anymore. Not after today.
When he let out a soft sigh, you were anticipating the worst. Then, he revealed the answer.
“Let’s watch a fucking Disney Princess movie.”
VERNON DID NOT WANT TO WATCH A FUCKING DISNEY PRINCESS MOVIE.
The moment you opened the door to your house—a shabby, student house about twenty minutes from campus—stepping inside, he realised there was no way back, and that he had to humour your wish, or else lose respect in your eyes.
As you brought him down the small hallway, leading into the little living room, you quickly grabbed the takeout boxes of your flatmates, murmuring hurried apologies as you left the room. The boy looked around, the slight cracks of the blue walls, the 32” TV sitting at the opposite end of the fraying couches. Posters of Bridget Jones, Notting Hill, and other Hugh Grant movies were plastered on one end of the wall, while Vernon nearly had a jumpscare when he caught a life-size cardboard cutout of some Disney hero—this one unrecognisable.
“That’s the love of my life you’re staring at,” came the voice behind him, and he whirled to see you, a huge bowl of popcorn cradled in your hands. “Why’re you standing in the middle like an idiot? Sit, sit!” Vernon obliged, making to settle on the sofas when you tutted. “Are you mental? No, sit on the bean bags near the TV!”
How stupid of me to assume I could sit on furniture designed for sitting, he meant to crow, but the moment he settled on the bean bags, he instantly preferred their malleable comfort. When he let out a relaxed sigh, you huffed out a laugh, propping the bowl before him. “See?”
“I was gonna say…” Vernon trailed off, watching you press a few buttons on the DVD player. “Where’s the CD?”
“Already in,” you said, picking up the remote as you settled in the beanbag next to him, scooting closer. Catching a look at his face, you bellowed, “Yes, Mr. Filmbro, I watched it recently!”
“How recently are we saying?”
“...yesterday evening.”
“And this is the masterpiece you wanna show me,” Vernon murmured, sneaking a look back at the cardboard cutout. “Don’t tell me he’s the floozy that’s leading the film.”
You turned the TV on. “Fine. I won’t tell you.”
He then looked at you. “Oh, Jesus.”
“Trust me!” you then reasoned, putting a hand on the boy’s knee—the mere touch had his brain rewiring, nerves all ceasing to work on the one point where your touch remained. You really had to stop—first your hand was on his mouth in that damned (blessed) closet, and now this soft reminder. He tried his best not to fix his eyes on your lingering fingers as you carried on, “This film is a modern classic. I promise.”
Well shit, he thought. When you looked at him like that, you could have convinced him that Quentin Tarantino was a better foot fetishiser than a filmmaker.
“Okay,” he said, almost believing in your words.
With that, the landing page for the movie turned on, and there were the main characters; he assumed the chick with the long, blonde hair was Rapunzel, and the man behind her—which, Vernon thought, did not deserve to be celebrated as a life-sized cardboard cutout—was the love interest. Whatever.
“Let’s just get this over with,” he mumbled as you pressed the fated Play, anticipating the worst.
And as the two of you fell silent, Vernon still holding out on the popcorn, watching suspiciously at the screen, the voice of a man flooded the TV speaker.
“This…this is the story of how I died.”
The boy immediately reacted, face dropping. “The fuck?” he got out, catching the WANTED! Poster of the very man he bad-mouthed not two minutes ago.
“But don’t worry, this is actually a fun story…and the truth is…it isn’t even mine.”
“Wait, this dude is already dead?” he asked.
“Just watch the movie!” you answered impatiently, making the boy sigh and lean back into the bean bag.
“This is the story of a girl named Rapunzel. And it starts…with the sun.”
You wanted to keep your eyes rooted to the screen, watch the unfurling of Mother Gothel’s backstory, but that was precisely when the incessant complaining began.
“Now why are we already getting context of some random witch’s actions? Less telling, more showing, man!” Vernon kept his arms crossed, shaking his head at the TV. “Oh, great, poor little king and queen in their big ass castle!”
“Having basic sympathy will take you great places, my guy,” you merely said, scoffing down the popcorn in the bowl. “Their kid just got stolen by some crazy bitch.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he murmured, piping down once more when the flashbacks ceased, and the present day was introduced into the story. On the screen, a small, green chameleon entered, camouflaging himself behind a pot of flowers. He guessed that the chick with the long hair—Rapunzel—would be finding him, and, lo and behold, he was right. In all fairness, though, it did not take a film degree to work that out.
He also did not need a film degree to guess that a musical number was about to be introduced, not even ten minutes into the movie. That he worked out all by himself, when the guitar riffs sounded. Beside him, you instantly brightened, smile widening as TANGLED morphed on the screen, the song about to begin.
It was around that point when, as he spared you a glance, he realised you were about to sing along.
“Oh, Jesus—”
If his life was a romantic film, this would have been the perfect setup; the girl that made his heart flutter was seated dangerously close to him, bean bags already touching with shoulders barely following, watching the cheesiest animated movie. He could have seen the shot now, with his gaze turning rose-y as you would open your mouth and sing along to the song. Of course, you would sing beautifully, better than the original singer, and he would sit there, absolutely mesmerised.
Oh, he was stunned alright.
“SEVEN AM THE USUAL MORNING, LINE UP—!”
The boy flinched at the sheer volume of your chant—screech would be the better word for it, for he guessed singing was not one of your natural talents.
You could not see his judgement at all, eyes closed and clutching your fists to your chest, continuing the song. “START ON THE FLOOR AND SWEEP TILL THE FLOOR’S ALL CLEEEEEANNNN—!”
A scoff escaped him, not quite believing the scene before him. He was shocked to silence, the movie’s music now in his background, the forefront being your attempt to outsing the princess. Either no one had told you how horrendous your singing was, or you simply did not care for the opinions of others. A part of him hoped that it was the latter—for you to be so comfortable in singing away, despite what others thought, made his judgement disappear.
Shamelessly you sang the entire number, up to the point where the scene cuts and the supposedly hot love interest—whose name was Flynn Rider, apparently, which he should have known if he just read the poster at the start of the movie like a normal viewer—was now trying to steal the crown jewels.
Vernon was too busy thinking about how stupid ‘Flynn Rider’ was as a name to realise that another song had just started. Immediately you changed your tune, your tone lowering, almost sultry.
This time, you looked at him when you started singing.
“Look at you, as fragile as a flower…”
“Ayo?” A glance at the TV screen, where Mother Gothel was now singing. “Another song?”
But you did not answer his question, only singing further as you reached your hand out to him. “Still a little sapling, just a sprout!” You continued, and, at that, your hand patted his mess of curls atop his head, mirroring Mother Gothel’s actions.
Blinking back repeatedly, he could not even shrug it off, stunned once again by how you were casually able to touch him and not feel anything—while his entire system shuts down like a lagging desktop when it tries to run the Sims.
The overdramatic flair was present in your singing, changed from the sweetness of the previous song. It was crazy how you remembered each word, not slipping at any chorus—you were a true fan, a committed admirer of the film. Even he could not comprehend knowing every single line of his favourites.
It was admirable indeed—to love a film as you did this one.
It was what made Vernon smile a little, turning away from your melodrama and focusing on the screen, where Mother Gothel now threatened to never be asked to leave the tower. Again.
This time, he would give the movie a chance. Thank God he decided to wake up.
The movie picked up the pace instantly—he had not expected Flynn to meet—and be whacked out by Rapunzel’s frying pan—so quickly, and had reflected her dejection when the mother screamed at her. He could tell where this was going, especially with the thief now in the closet, but he found himself grabbing a handful of popcorn from the bowl without turning away from the screen.
By the time the third song of the movie came around, he was taken aback that it arrived further in, surrounded by the thugs of the Snuggly Duckling. Without realising, he turned to you, anticipating you breaking out into a song, but you were merely watching the movie, bobbing your head along to the beat.
Noticing his stare, you glanced at him. “Expecting a show?”
“Since you were giving them out without request, I figured this time would be like any other.”
You snorted, grabbing the popcorn. “I’m saving my heavenly voice for the best song, actually.”
Vernon mocked a gasp. “So you’re telling me Mother Knows Best isn’t the best feature?”
“Don’t chat shit, Mr. Filmbro, because Mother Knows Best is one of the top five.”
“I look forward to seeing which song you’re holding out for,” he only said, turning back to the movie again. The popcorn ran out about this time, and you shot up from your bean bag, promising more as you exited the room, leaving him to continue.
By the time you returned, the protagonists were escaping, chaos ensuing all around them with the guards, his partners and that eccentric white horse chasing them. Ending up in the cave, they recognise a lack of way out, and although Vernon was aware that the movie ends on the happiest note, a small part of him filled with dread.
That dread disappeared instantly when Flynn confessed his little secret.
“Eugene Fitzherbert?!” The boy demanded.
You chuckled at his disdain. “Yeah, Flynn Rider was hotter. Eugene Fitzherbert ages him about forty years.”
“Flynn Rider was silly, but Eugene is straight up diabolical.”
“He is still fuckable regardless!” you shushed him, raising your pointer at him. “You wish you had his sex appeal.”
The boy rolled his eyes. “Yeah, let me just change my name to Bartholomew Whiteman real quick.”
“Hey!” you whacked him on the arm, this time laughing heartily at his quip. “Let my man live!”
He decided to spare your fictional man any more bullying, taking in the town atmosphere where the two adventurers and Maximus had now ended up. “Ooooo, the castle dances are my favourite scenes!” you gushed, scooping popcorn in one hand and eating with the other. “Wait, look, look at the braid!”
“Jeez, I’m looking!” he insisted, watching the girls braid Rapunzel’s hair. Flynn—which Vernon is continuing to identify him as, because Eugene was too much for him—stared at her longingly at the results. Vernon used the popcorn as an excuse to gaze at you matching Flynn’s longing at the screen. Your head rested on your knees, locking your hands in front of them, forming a lazy smile. This smile remained throughout Rapunzel and Eugene’s activities, even to the point when the couple were settled in a boat, waiting for the lights.
“It’s happening,” you declared, the smile widening as you released your legs from your hands. “Oh my God, it’s fucking happening!”
Raising the volume, the boy watched the screen, where thousands of lanterns were sparking alight at the king and queen’s signal. The lanterns’ lights broke across the borders of the town, melting into the sea, the docked ships. Rapunzel had not noticed though, too busy dropping flower heads upon the water’s surface, Flynn helpfully holding out the bunch.
As the princess dropped another upon the waterbed, she finally noticed the beginning.
It was then Vernon heard your favourite Disney song.
“All those days, watching from the window…All those years, outside looking in…”
You followed this time, not as loud as the other songs, quiet and soft, as if letting the blonde shine in her song. “All that time, never even knowing, just how blind I’ve been…””
You exhibited the same excitement as Rapunzel, who, noticing the lanterns, threw off Flynn’s balance, hanging onto the curling bow of the boat.
The boy, however, was not really focused on the screen.
Because the music that surrounded the two crept into his ears, playing the strings of his senses; because the lights were off save for the TV, shining its dimmed lighting upon your face, making you glow with the dark purples, blues, golds of the Tangled scenery. He lost all interest in everything because you were looking something out of a daydream, watching the events of the movie as if they were scenes of salvation. The two of you were definitely not on any kind of boat, merely sitting on bean bags. Despite all of that, he began to float—swaying from where he sat, as if he was truly settled on water.
“Now I’m here—” You put your hand to your chest— “Blinking in the starlight…now I’m here, suddenly I see…”
You kept singing the lyrics, voice more subdued than your last outbursts, and Vernon could only watch you, the pure love of this song radiating off your very pores. Vernon’s anticipation rose with every octave of the singer’s voice rising, eyes never leaving your face, the parted mouth.
“Standing here, it’s oh! so clear…!”
As the viewers themselves were about to observe the thousands of lanterns Rapunzel witnessed, Vernon himself waiting, he made the mistake of averting his gaze from you, if only to see the grand reveal.
It was what made you unconsciously envelop your fingers with his, clasping his hand with yours.
He whipped his head to yours, eyes widening to the point of spilling.
You were already looking at him.
When you sang the next lyrics, Vernon could have melted molten.
“I’m where I’m meant to be!”
And as the lanterns surrounded the protagonists, lighting up the entirety of the night, you sang the chorus to the boy in your little college flat, no one to witness it but two of you.
“And at last I see the light! And it’s like the fog has lifted!”
Your voice was hoarse now, all the screech-singing catching up to you. Vernon, in another lifetime, would have instantly resisted, ran for the hills if it was literally anyone else in the room but you.
“And at last I see the light! And it’s like the sky…is new…”
But it was you—you holding his hand tightly, you looking at him with the light of the lanterns in your eyes, you opening up to him in your little haven, away from anyone else. Granted, you could have offered this performance to anyone, but he liked to think—shit, he was truly hoping—that you would not have done this for anyone else.
You would have only sang your favourite song to him.
“And it’s warm, and real, and bright! And the world has somehow…shifted…”
Vernon watched you halt a moment, waiting for the next verse, your hand tightening in his.
“All at once…everything looks different…”
You were right—the world had shifted underneath him, stilled under the dimmed lighting of this dingy living room. The two of you now faced each other, music still tuning from the TV, but the characters long forgotten, as if they never existed. Yes, you were right in that everything looked different, seemed different, as if he was seeing you for the very first time.
“Now that I…see you.”
Shit. You were rather beautiful before him.
You paused then, watching his reaction. You tilted your head, thoroughly amused by the sheer awe that radiated from his face, but then you noticed his chest rise and fall, more unevenly the longer you observed him.
The next detail you caught was how his eyes darted down—down to your lips.
It was the lips, which were watched so intently, that parted.
You attempted at a little humour. “Out of all my talents, I guess singing isn’t one of them.”
But Vernon did not respond with words. Sure, he would have agreed with you, but singing was irrelevant now. Out of all these infinite talents you possessed—your natural charm, your ease in making him laugh, your trespassing and eventual escaping of such crimes—Vernon could not have given less of a shit about singing. Not when you were before him, bathed in an unnatural, extraordinary light, soft music playing in the background. Almost as if he had adorned the rose-tinted glasses, courtesy of the universe.
In any romantic comedy, he would have kissed her.
The boy was not known to be courageous—anything but brave. Real Life, Not Clickbait Vernon would have left by now. The Real Vernon should have pussied out.
You, however, looked a little too beautiful to be treated with cowardice.
“Are you going to kiss me, Mr. Filmbro, or are you gonna make me wait till the end of the movie?”
He parted his mouth for a split second, gob-smacked at your question. The twinkle in your gaze, though, had him spluttering out a harsh chuckle, craning his head down at the sheer absurdity of it all. But then he looked up, smiling, not quite believing what he was about to do.
“I should make you wait.”
That was what he said. What Vernon instead did was finally grow the two balls that were supposed to be hidden in his pants, leaning in and pressing his lips against yours.
Now the boy always wondered whether the movies were right—when mouths would touch, move against each other, whether a fire would ignite between souls, whether one really felt as if they were not of this world.
It seemed like Hallmark-level bullshit to him, but the moment his lips touched yours, he began to float out of this room. A soft hum reverated from you, approval at his actions, and he could have burst as he felt you smile against him.
Maybe Disney was right. God, he really did not want to be in such accord with that stupid corporation, but they were onto something with the fireworks, the orchestral singing when couples kiss. He himself felt a choir-like chant all around him as he brought his hand to your face, angling it slightly so he could gain better access, boost your pleasure as he delved slightly deeper.
He was unstoppable. He was alive and ecstatic and delirious, opening his mouth wider, his other hand now finding your waist, snuffing out any distance between you two. It was not like he was a pro in these situations—he had only ever had one serious girlfriend, and that was at an age where a boy could get away with merely ‘french-kissing’ (as the kids back then would have gloated) your significant other. Again, he may have fooled around a little in college, too, but never had he experienced this haze of lust, this newfound desire.
This desire enhanced further when you slipped your tongue from the seams, sliding it along his as an invitation for more, and he could have honestly thanked that heinous hag Walt Disney for making movies you adored so much, to the point of showing him and landing him in this situation. Of course he indulged you, opening his mouth enough to let you inside. The sensation of your tongue slipping past his lips had a soft noise releasing from his throat.
Tangled was all but forgotten, the two of you too occupied being entangled with each other. You pulled him even closer, wrapping your arms around his neck, fingers brushing against the ends of his hair. The soft touches had every strand of his locks standing on edge, a wave of delight washing over him.
You were sagged into the bean bag, Vernon’s weight upon you sinking you further, but you did not mind it—relished it, his scent engulfing you, the sighs and soft murmurs of his every exhale haunting your eardrums. Who would have thought that a boy who could recite every Joker quote from The Dark Knight—Virgin Supremism you termed the talent—had this kind of game hidden underneath? How was he able to ignite such powerful emotions from you?
How was Vernon ‘Filmbro’ Chwe able to make you feel so good you did not realise Tangled finishing right before you?
The two of you could have spent all night intertwined in each other, perhaps would have gone past the boundaries of mere making out. However, between the haze of his soft whispers to you, your own mist swimming in your head, you heard the starting music of the DVD reverting to the home page, and like instinct you opened your eyes, finding that the movie had ended.
You must have paused, because Vernon immediately stopped, concern staining his pretty features. His knitted brow, eyes laced with nervousness, shamed you for ever stopping. “What’s wrong? Did I do something?”
“Oh, no, no!” You felt like a fool for the answer you attempted to give him. “It’s just, um…”
He followed your line of sight, turning around. Once he realised, he looked back at you, you surprised to find a little shock replacing his concern. “We were going for that long?”
Your smirk had his stomach knotting. “This is what happens when you make out with someone you like, Mr. Filmbro.”
He could not respond, looking away as his flushed face managed to redden some more. You only laughed at him, playing with the hem of his shirt, his arms still steady as they caged you. “You are so lucky, you know.”
He quirked a brow. “And why is that?”
“I would never miss the second half of Tangled for a man.”
It was so incredibly stupid, how he felt a semblance of pride at the notion.“Happy to know I’m an exception.”
“You do know I’m gonna make you watch it again so you can say you’ve watched it.”
Vernon tilted his head to the side, lost in thought. You watched him, anticipating. “This is the part where you say you’d rather Mingyu jump you than rewatch Tangled.”
“Well yes, but…” He glanced over his shoulder, where your shelf of DVDs were stacked, a particular movie which had caught his eye previously now standing out all the more. “I, uh…”
He looked back at you, and the self-conscious glint in his gaze had you watching his every movement. “I was hoping to show you my favourite movie instead.”
You were ready to make a comment on how you prided on avoiding Nolan films like the plague, but then you remembered the conversation at Mingyu’s house. Your eyebrows could have touched your hairline. “You said I could never know.”
“Well…” a small smile escaped him, slowly pulling himself away. “If I am to be your exception, _____, then I suppose you can be mine.”
Gaping at him, you could only keep silent as he, with great effort on his part, heaved off you, making his way to the shelf. He was lucky, you thought—had he been a moment slower, that comment alone would have had you kissing him again.
What quickly caught your attention was him sliding his pointer finger through your collection, a series of your favourites. The anticipation was rising, you not quite believing that Mr. Filmbro’s favourite film was within your arsenal. Weeks ago, you would have bullied him relentlessly for the ironic hypocrisy.
When he pulled out the fated DVD, you let out the greatest laugh.
The boy instantly frowned, but you did not realise, cackling and cackling away at the selection, the final boss of Vernon’s favourite film, nestled between his fingers. “Shut up,” he mumbled, but again, you did not hear him, lost in the shrill sound of your laughter, erupting the room to life.
“Oh, Jesus—” Your chortling did not seem to stop, almost to the point of hiccups. “Your ass…this entire time—!”
“And suddenly I’m leaving!” Vernon announced, getting up and about to drop the DVD.
He did not last long in his determination when you grabbed onto the end of his shirt, grinning still. “Thank God you’re not a Nolan kiss-ass…that’s all I’m saying.”
All he could do was stand like an idiot, the tips of your fingers caressing the skin just above his trousers. “But I am a Nolan kiss-ass,” he murmured, crossing his arms.
“That’s what I thought, too, but this film—” you jerked your head towards the prize in his hand. “You’ve redeemed yourself.”
“Stop it,” he only said, crouching down to pull out the Tangled CD, replacing it with the new, and, in his opinion, improved movie. “This is why I didn’t want to tell anyone.”
“And nobody will know,” you assured him, watching the movie’s main menu pop up, the PLAY option highlighted. “This’ll be our secret.”
“First the trespassing,” Vernon began, sitting down beside you, “Then the tampering of movies, and now this.” He grabbed the remote, about to play the movie. “How much more are we gonna sneak around?”
You looked at him, and the smile you offered him had him glancing away—only for a second. “Have you not had fun, though? Sneaking around with me?”
Normally, in a situation where he had zero balls, he would have evaded such a question, not fanned the flames of your fire. But tonight he had watched a Disney movie with you, felt your fingers caressing his skin, had even kissed you in the purple hues of Tangled’s light. Tonight, he could conquer the world.
What would answering a heated question do any harm?
Vernon locked eyes with you then, trying to fight his smile. “I think I could have fun with you anywhere…in secret or for anyone to see.”
As something in your gaze shifted, he turned the film on (an entendre which was completely intentional).
Once again, the two of you were in the same position, watching yet another film, this time another’s all time favourite. The narrator began in a strange, European accent, explaining the tale of an unfortunate princess, much like Rapunzel, and her dire situation.
Although it was undoubtedly his most treasured film, the boy had a very hard time paying attention when all he could feel was that penetrating stare of yours, capable of revealing his very soul from beneath his measly shirt. Even when the stranger main character was introduced, following his main routine in his strangest abode, Vernon was not particularly concentrating anymore.
Not when he heard your voice, a soft question amongst the gaudy music of the 2000s. “Do you mean that, Vernon?”
And perhaps it was because you said his actual name, especially when your voice sounded like…like that. Like something from a perfect movie soundtrack, akin to the end-credits of an unforgettable TV show.
Because he was too occupied with simply admiring you, he merely nodded, biting the inside of his cheek.
And because you were too busy admiring him, his words, the entire night where you had felt pure, euphoric joy, you did Mr. Filmbro a little dirty by making a decision that negated his film.
You shifted closer once more, hands reaching out to hold his face.
This time, Vernon was prepared when you kissed him.
There was a certain eagerness in your lips this time which was newer—more enjoyable to his senses. It made sense now, why all these couples in movies made out for hours and hours on end. He felt as if he could kiss you forever, move against your mouth, delve inside until his tongue memorised your very imprint.
You moaned a little louder this time, and the very sound had his heartbeat racing, moreso when, as he pressed you against him, shifting upon his beanbag, he knew then and there that something in the air shifted.
Last time, you had stopped. This time, there was no such indication—the very thought had him skirting his hands around you, holding you tight enough to never let go.
Still—even with such possibilities, there was no way you and him would escalate to the point of losing his virginity.
Whatever happens though, he will still watch the end of his favourite film.
Whatever happens, Vernon would not be having sex with you if Shrek was playing in the background.
VERNON LOST HIS VIRGINITY WITH SHREK PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.
Certainly not his greatest achievements, considering he could not focus on his favourite movie, but it was certainly not his fault. You were—to put it quite plainly—hot as fuck.
He did not leave until the very next day because—as he had stated that night—he still wanted you to watch Shrek, and did, somehow, end up watching it properly. You did not stop teasing him, and he did not stop shutting you up by kissing you senseless.
Unfortunately, the boy did have college the next day, so he had to leave at some point, but not without promises of meeting you again. This time, however, you two did not continue the crimes he committed with you. You and Vernon were not modern-day Joker and Harley Quinn.
When the two of you were not terrorising Mingyu’s livelihood, you decided to hang out at the filmstore, where it all began. Vernon would host weekly movie nights, and both of you would eat popcorn and watch each other’s recommendations, scoring them differently in accordance to what was most important for each other.
For the film majoring student, the rating was influenced not only by the actors’ performances, but also from the intricate storyline, the character developments, their relationships. A story, for him at least, was about relationships. Good cinema was about the chemistry between two actors, the emotional connection they had not just with each other, but also their effect on the audience. The actual editing of the film, too, was another bullet point in his criteria.
Your rating, on the other hand, differed slightly.
“Michelle Yeoh is such a MILF,” was your only comment upon finishing Everything Everywhere All at Once.
This comment nearly made Vernon lose his mind. “One of the greatest movies of this decade, and this is your only input?”
“But am I wrong, though?”
Vernon sighed a little at that—at the end of the day, you were absolutely in the right. There was a reason Crazy Rich Asians went platinum in his dingy little room.
Of course, it was not just his personal recommendations that played. You had compiled a list of your all-time favourites, going beyond Disney’s borders, and Vernon was introduced to the dashing timeless genre of the rom-com. Now having a younger sister who (he thought) was a basic bitch meant he did possess some knowledge of the genre, but he had never really sat down and watched a rom-com without falling asleep in Sofia’s bed.
For you, though, he braved the most famous romances, which he found himself enjoying more than he would have liked—more so when he found one of his favoured actors in 10 Things I Hate About You.
“Heath Ledger singing was something I never thought I needed,” Vernon commented as the ferocious couple finally kissed.
“And this is the same fella who was the Joker in your little Nolan film,” you reminded him, as if he was not aware already. “Oh, and he was the gay cowboy in that movie.”
“Gay cowboy?” His confusion lasted for approximately thirty seconds before he groaned, pushing you over on your beanbag. “My god, are you talking about Brokeback Mountain?”
“Yes, that one!” you exclaimed, picking up the TV remote. “My guy has range, but him as a high schooler is still my favourite role.”
“You do realise how bad that sounds, right?”
“You know what I mean,” you said, waving him off as you began searching for the next movie. “Now, Two Weeks’ Notice or The Proposal?”
Vernon endeavoured to weigh in on the options. “Which one do you think I’d like?”
“Well, both have Sandra Bullock in them…”
He looked over both DVDs. “Now that’s a white woman I can get behind.”
You scooched a little over to him, locking your hands together. “We can watch something you like…” When he knitted his brows together, not quite answering you, you went on, almost unable to look him in the eye. “You’ve been super nice, you know…sitting through all my favourites.”
The boy could not help it, unable to let a smirk slip. “Is this _____ appreciating me for once?” The beginnings of his shit-eating attitude did not develop, since your smack on his arm completely snuffed it out. “Ow, damn!”
“You deserved that,” you muttered, beginning to scoot away until Vernon’s hand on your wrist stopped you.
When you focused your gaze at him, he already beat you to it. “Let’s watch both today.”
It was silly, how that made your heart beat faster. “Really? You would watch two rom-coms in a row?”
As his hand pulled you closer, his stare had you almost—almost—nervous. “I’ve done worse for you.”
“Very true,” you said, absent-minded, more lost in the twinkle of his eyes. “Very, uh…good point.”
Vernon thanked all the higher bodies that may have existed for the pure, unadulterated rizz he was attempting to spew. “I’m full of good points,” he crowed. “Now, are you going to stare at me all night, or are we going to watch Sandra Bullock?”
Although your cheeks burned, you pushed him off, earning a chuckle from him. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Mr. Filmbro. The only man I’ll be staring at will be Ryan Reynolds in The Proposal.”
All of the boy’s suave attitude dissipated at his shock. “The Deadpool guy?!”
“Ryan Reynolds did have range before,” you explained, shaking your head. “Then the superhero bug bit him.”
“What a shame,” he only said, as if Vernon did not follow the Deadpool universe to the point of possessing special editioned comics in his room. Still, he happily slotted the CD inside the player, and excused himself to make more popcorn for the two of you.
As the boy prepared snacks, glancing back every time at the opening scene, he managed to sneak a look at you, eagerly watching the screen.
He could only smile, putting all the popcorn in the huge bowl before hurrying back to you.
THIS WAS PROBABLY THE FIRST TIME YOU WORE A SUIT TO A CINEMA. PERHAPS THIS WAS THE FIRST TIME YOU WORE A SUIT AT ALL.
Admittedly, it was not as if you had intended to go into the cinema in formal attire—or, at least the only formal clothing you had. Your first plan was to steal something from your father’s wardrobe, but when you tried it on, it did not fit properly, and you refused to look like an idiot in public.
Not that you cared much about looking like an idiot in public before, but there was another person to look out for. And that person, although had already done embarrassing enough actions for you, did not want to push it further. One more ceremonious act of humiliation, and Vernon would have run a thousand miles from you—or that was what you thought.
You observed your cinema fit one last time before your bathroom mirror, fixing the lapels for the nth time. Your rented three-piece suit was almost a second skin, waistcoat snug underneath the tweed jacket, matching coloured trousers adorned alongside. You borrowed some Oxford brogues from a friend, which made you realise that you had more posh friends than you knew. You tried to find a hat similar to the one Cillian Murphy wore in the promotions, but because you did not have the wardrobe of a middle aged man, you resorted to let your head rest.
All of this elaborate planning to see Nolan’s (apparently) greatest release yet—Oppenheimer.
Because the cinema was not far away from you, you decided to walk, messaging your date to let him know that you were on your way. You were certain he was already there in the cinema; Vernon, since you had started hanging out more with him, had only ever talked about Nolan’s upcoming epic. You swore if you recited the IMDB plot out to him during sex, he would have spunked within minutes (a mental note to experiment on that later). His excitement had you booking midnight release tickets, which consequently made him so happy you thought you had invited Nolan to the town cinema.
The night, furthering along, had beautified the black sky, stars twinkling on your journey. The consistent vibrations from your phone indicated the boy’s imminent excitement, and you smiled, double-checking your formal attire once more. You would have romanticised the nighttime further but living in student area brought you right back to fearing slightly for your life, so you quickened your step, cinema already a close speck in the distance.
You knew you were nearer to the destination when the flocks of pink and black grew, the cowboy hats and fake pipes all piling up in your vision. Seeing the pink reminded you of Barbie’s influence, also being released tonight alongside the more serious counterpart.
A small part of you really wanted to see the midnight release for the new movie. The original plan most people were following was either to watch Oppenheimer and then Barbie, or the other way around. You were so close to procuring tickets for the latter, but decided that it was important to accompany Vernon to the seemingly bigger release. After all, you were never as excited about films as the dear film major you had rather grown to like.
Another vibration of your phone, and you finally decided to stop ignoring said-film major and text him, possibly informing you of his arrival.
mr. filmbro: yo where u at
mr. filmbro: they’re too many pink mfs out here im getting suffocated
You rolled your eyes.
_____: im coming to save u kitten.
mr. filmbro: :0
Once you were inside, it was a complete sea of pink and black and grey. Two sides, which one would assume would be opposing, were all celebrating, sharing their drinks, anticipating when the theatre doors would open to let everyone in. Within this myriad of fans, you tried to search for the most mentally ill one—the one who you were certain had a finer three-piece set than you, who would have happily stolen Cillian Murphy’s set clothes to truly honour the movie.
Strangely enough, after a few minutes, you could not find him, even after confirming your seats. You searched for anyone wearing anything devoid of colour, but did not find the boy. This time, you decided to bother him, calling him and pressing the phone to your ear.
“Where are you, kitten?” you purposely growled, lowering your voice an octave. “Daddy’s waiting.”
“Kitten actually killed himself after hearing that,” was his purposeful monotone.
“Can you resurrect yourself for me real quick? I’m tryna find where you are.”
“I’m next to the Oppenheimer popup.” Immediately you tried to find it, scouring through the crowds. “I figured you’d find me easier.”
Scoffing, you ignored the Barbie stalls, walking further ahead. “How very smart of you to wear Oppenheimer clothing while standing next to it. So much easier to find you, isn’t it?”
He did not retort back, instead inciting your excitement. “Wait, I think I can see you…?”
Your eyes darted over to the fresh faces of the Nolan fans, all taking pictures of the cast pop-ups. What you were observing were the men and women, all lack of colour.
What your gaze ended up on was someone completely different.
What you were expecting was a mini-Oppenheimer, the too-large blazer, the sashed hat upon pretty brown curls. What you received instead was a boy engulfed in all the pinks of the colour wheel.
Pink was the colour of his top, bubblegum pink the colour of the stringy fur coat sporting over said shirt. Magenta was the colour of his flared trousers, whilst rose was the colour of his converse. What topped off the entire look was the hot pink cowboy hat, sitting perfectly upon his wavy locks, completing his fit—a fit which was perfect for the Barbie movie.
It was around that point that he caught on to your stare—through the oceans of opposing fans, he, too, finally found you.
Vernon heard your curse murmur through the phone. “Oh my fucking God.”
That was when his own gaze roamed over you, shocked and shameless amongst the crowds. Not that the crowds mattered, not anymore. He was a little nervous, he had to admit it to himself, only because there were so many people, and they were only watching for the fad, for the trend. A part of him wanted just you and him in this midnight cinema, the biggest official date yet.
But then seeing you here, in all your black-clad, Oppenheimered glory, had stunned him to his core. Although he had specifically brought you here to watch the movie, he had completely expected you to arrive in the pinkmania fit. Because you had kindly booked tickets for his anticipated film, he thought at least to participate in the Barbie craze fit.
It was like instinct, how his steps gravitated towards you, his phone still pressed against his ear, very much like you. You followed him slowly, hearing his ragged breaths through the speaker, watching him walk closer and closer until you both were a mere couple of feet away.
Only then did you drop the call, your hands at your sides as you admired him. It was a while before any of you spoke.
Like always, you spoke first. “Tell me the fur coat is yours.”
A ghost of a smirk. “Sofia’s.”
“Stealing’s like second nature to you now, isn’t it?” you taunted.
Like always, he dodged your taunts. “I thought you were gonna wear all pink.”
“I thought you were gonna wear all black.”
He tilted his head. “Well, I thought since we were watching both movies…”
Your confusion was clear, the corner of his lips curling further up. “Wasn’t Oppenheimer first?”
He then went inside his flared trouser pockets, fishing out two tickets—its colours matching his outfit. “I know how much you wanted to see Margot Robbie be silly.”
“I did!” you exclaimed, taking the tickets from him, admiring how pretty they were designed, especially when compared to the Oppenheimer marketing tickets. In your admiration, though, you noticed a detail which had your excitement faltering. “Wait, are you sure? It says the movie’s at the same time.”
Vernon then checked the timings, mouth parting. “Oh shit. Didn’t think about that.” He shook his head, mouth straightening in a line, dejected. “This is what happens when I try to do something romantic.”
“I have to give points for effort,” you offered, bringing your hands to his wrist. “Hey, it’s okay. Let’s watch Oppenheimer, honestly. Cillian Murphy is still hot when he’s old.”
“No, no,” he countered, clasping your hands on his wrist. “It’s chill.” He glanced down. “Let’s do Barbie first.”
You attempted to argue him on this, but he simply let go of your hands, with his one hand wrapping around your waist, and the other hand’s wrist being checked for the time. You bit back a smile at his mere actions, relishing his fingers skirting under the suit, the waistcoat. “Vernon,” you attempted.
“_____,” he said back, staring at you with an awe that you would have deserved had you worn a couture gown, not some rented hand-me-downs.
You knew he would not take no for an answer now. “But what about Oppenheimer?” you asked anyway as the two of you made your way to the cinema.
Vernon only pretended to think extremely deeply of the situation, making you elbow him playfully. “Now tell me, Dear Disney Hag, how did we enter Mingyu’s house?”
“Why, we walked straight in!” you answered like an over-enthusiastic student, in which he sarcastically clapped for you.
“Right on.” As you both walked towards the Barbie theatre, the opposing movie was being screened right beside you, where people were bursting in. “See how everyone is walking in right now?” He gave you a knowing glance.
That knowing glance had you scoffing in excited disbelief. “My God! Look at you, all ready to commit crimes!” you looped a hand around his arm. “I have taught you well, young man.”
He patted your arm. “Mr. Filmbro has come a long way from chatting shit about your movie taste.”
“So you admit it?” you leaned in. “Disney makes better movies than your flop directors?”
“That’s a completely different claim,” he clarified. “My taste in films is objectively better.”
“Still doesn’t change the fact you're watching the Barbie movie before Oppenheimer.”
He rolled his eyes, tugging you closer. “That’s ‘cause I like you a lot, Disney Hag…”
You did not stop your smile from lighting up your entire face. “You’re not the most insufferable filmbro I’ve dated I guess…”
”I better be the last filmbro you date,” he muttered, watching over the last of the crowds, where they now stood, waiting to enter the theatre.
The longer you waited to answer him, the more incredulous his face became, brows knotted in disbelief. You only chuckled, leaning in and pressing your lips upon his. Of course, he was taken aback, but surprises like these were pleasant, welcomed with open arms as Vernon closed his eyes, pulling you in.
The moment the line started quickening you broke away, only to make sure no one skipped in front of you and him, and thus deal with yours and his passive aggression. You could not help the giggle that escaped you at breaking away from his lips, relishing in his dazed state.
Honestly—you truly would not have minded being anywhere with him.
When it was finally your turn to go inside the Barbie screening, you held tightly to his hand. “Let’s go, Mr. Filmbro.”
Vernon only smiled. “Right behind you, _____.”
And as the two of you entered the theatre, hand-in-hand, the boy learned that perhaps he, too, would have gone anywhere with you.
#alice recs#group: svt#member: vernon#genre: fluff#author: amourcheol#trope: college au#type: oneshot#fia sucks#fia loser#i guess you could say….. they were filmnemesises to filmlovers#i have to respect the filmbro research you did for this fic#vernon’s so real for getting annoyed at that customer who asked the stupid ass lord of the rings question#i’m not even into lord of the rings like that but DONT PISS ME OFF#VERNON STOP THROWING DISNEY ADULT ALLEGATIONS AT HER 💔#vernon internally beefing with mingyu during the little women discussion was cinematic in my head#AND HE'S SO RIGHT#JO SHOULD’VE BEEN ON HER OWN IDGAF#her contact name being normal disney enjoyer is killing me#mc asking him who it was as if she recruited several more people to carry out her plan#vernon being a mean girls anti i just killed myself#PLEASE FORGIVE ME NOLAN FOR WHAT IM ABOUT TO DO IS CRAZY#mc is so right about the pocahontas soundtrack#colors of the wind changed my life#‘vernon may not be much of a knight#but if they were caught#he knew he would have to protect you.’#‘vernon may not be much of a knight but if they were caught he knew he would have to protect you’#😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 WHY IS HE SO CUTE…….#MINGYU RUNNING AT THE CAR LIKE A VILLAINNN GOD I WOULD BE SCARED FOR MY LIFE#(jk mingyu i would be running back to u)
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I came to mention that Marvel is owned by Disney and Disney supported Israel, so we are boycotting Disney
I'm giving you an additional reason to boycott (And I'm angry that Pixar's movie about emotions, the continuation of the previous movie, was a success, even a bomb, which means that Disney got the money)
So in short, Marvel belongs to Disney, and Disney supported Israel financially and even bragged about it, so if you type "Disney support Israel" on the Internet, you will see his message and how he brags about it)
So fuck Disney, not for "Woke", but for supporting Israel, for censoring the creators, for recording in the area next to labor camps during the filming of "Mulan", fuck him for everything
TOH proved that diversity is not Disney's problem and right-wing conservatives call it "Woke" I give depth to the characters, the problem is queerbaiting and paying for anti-LGBT+ organizations
Disney is a disgusting capitalist company that only thinks about making money (Pocahontas and how much they romanticized white crimes and antagonized the tribe because they are angry and aggressive towards innocent white colonizers… And this romance, which is problematic, because it was based on a book by a man who distorted the facts and the real Pocahontas gave him a hard time for what he wrote in the book)
This movie proved that Disney counts on money, not on quality and creative freedom (Because "Beauty and the Beast" won an Oscar, it must get it too, fuck the fact that the movie is distasteful to those who learn about this girl's story)
Disney has so much shit on its conscience that it's no wonder it gave money to the colonizer
So yes, boycott the movie not only because of the characters depicting Israel, but also because Marvel belongs to Disney
#free palestine#palestina#free free palestine#i stand with palestine#long live palestine#palestine#palestine will be free#palestinian#palestinian genocide#palestinian lives matter#pro palestine#palestinians#strike for palestine#we stand with palestine#israel is a terrorist state#gaza#israel#free gaza#disney animation#disney#walt disney#fuck disney#marvel#gaza strip#gaza genocide#stand with gaza#fuck israel#boycott israel#anti israel#israel is evil
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Disney songs that hit different when you're queer
"Reflection" Mulan (specifically if you're transgender)
"I'll Make A Man Out of You" Mulan (the transmasc euphoria song)
"Jack's Lament" the Nightmare Before Christmas
"Part of Your World" the Little Mermaid
"God Help the Outcasts" the Hunchback of Notre Dame
"I'm Still Here" Treasure Planet (specifically my transmasc anthem but my experiences are not universal)
"Out There" the Hunchback of Notre Dame (when you're closeted)
"Waiting On a Miracle" Encanto (when you're queer and religious)
"One of Us" Lion King 2
"How Far I'll Go" Moana ( when the people who raised you wouldn't let you be exposed to any queer media)
"Colors of The Wind" Pocahontas (the only good thing the Pocahontas franchise brought us was the soundtrack. When my friend was closeted she said to a girl who was being blatantly homophobic " you think the only people who are people are the people that look and think like you." Stopped her in her tracks!)
"Kiss the Girl" the Little Mermaid (but specifically when. You know what I mean lmao)
"When Will My Life Begin" Tangled
"Go The Distance" Hercules
"I Won't Say I'm In Love" Hercules
"One Jump Ahead (reprise)" Aladdin
"Proud of Your Boy" Aladdin Broadway musical
"If I Never Knew You" Pocahontas
Do feel free to add. Just don't let Disney see this
#be niceys to me i know my experiences are not universal#queer#queer Disney#gay disney#disney#the hunchback of notre dame#treasure planet#the little mermaid#mulan#tangled#hercules#aladdin#encanto#the lion king 2#moana#the nightmare before christmas
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CP: Yeah. I hope this gets cut. But then Jasmine, I'm more of an Aladdin. Like, I wasn't really a John Smith. So, like, I if I had to, like, have a love story, I'd definitely then Jasmine. Okay?
Until they have their lesbian Disney movie.
TH: I mean, what a great combo that would be.
CP: Oh my god. Pocahontas with Jasmine?
TH: Right?
CP: No. No. Too much of the same.
TH: Too much good hair. Too much hair.
CP: Too much hair.
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Thanks for tagging me! ❤️❤️
reblog this and put which disney princess was your childhood favorite in the tags. it’s for science
#Princesses by Birth Or Marriage: Aurora Belle Cinderella Ariel Jasmine Eilonwy Pocahontas Maid Marian#Princesses by Disney meaning only and no title officially: Esmeralda Mulan Katrina Megara Jane Alice Duchess & Marie Nala#I feel like I’m missing someone but can’t imagine who at the moment
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Disney Princes Ideal Partners (Pt. 2)
Request: Hi I loved the Headcanon you made of A Relationship with the Princesses, so I could make a Headcanon of a relationship with the Princes. please it would be great
NOTE: I do not write for Pocahontas and I'm not a huge fan of Smith but in the interest of keeping this even and mirroring it with the princess one, he has been included
Aladdin
First and foremost, Aladdin wants a partner who accepts all parts of him. Sure, he can be cunning and sweet talking but he's also rough around the edges from living on the streets for so long
Someone who has a similar situation or who is always up for a good time would also be welcome
If you can provide (money or food) he will also be hooked, he's not a gold digger but the idea of stability and knowing where his next meal is coming from will definitely have him interested
John Smith
An ideal partner for John would challenge his way of thinking
He's a lone wolf, married to adventure so in order to have him falling for you, you'd need to be someone new, someone he wants to learn from
He wants a partner who will inspire him to think and see the world in a new way and likewise, he wants to share his own views and life with you
Li Shang
General Li Shang's first and foremost thought always is pleasing/making his father proud, so a partner who his father approves of is always a good start
He doesn't want a traditional partner who stays at home, he wants someone he can see as his equal, who will challenge him and who he can challenge
His ideal partner would be someone who respects him, but who he can also respect. Bonus points if you know how to fight
Naveen
Naveen is a fun loving guy, so his ideal partner would balance him out. They would appreciate and know how to have a good time, but when it comes down to it be able to be hardworking and serious when he struggles to be
He doesn't know a lot of the basic skills required to function, so he would appreciate someone who could either do that or teach him how. Someone he could also teach things he knows to, how to let loose, music, that kind of stuff
Someone who understands he's more than just a prince, someone who wants to be with him not because of his good looks or money but because he has a good heart and cares about them
Flynn/Eugene
Flynn wants someone who knows how to have a little bit of fun
His ideal partner understands where he's come from and wants to build a future together that means something, he wants them to truly know him
He also wouldn't mind if his partner is struggling in their own way, he wants to help them just as much as they help him. He wants the chance to prove that he's more than everyone sees him as and that he has a lot to offer
#disney imagine#disney headcanons#disney x reader#aladdin x reader#john smith x reader#li shang x reader#prince naveen x reader#flynn rider x reader#aladdin imagine#john smith imagine#li shang imagine#prince naveen imagine#flynn rider imagine#gender neutral imagine#gender neutral reader
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Pocahontas (1995) is a good movie, actually, btw
#yesss. yeesssss. torture the blond man some more.#pocahontasedit#fyeahpocahontas#disneyedit#disneyfeverdaily#disney animation#disneygif#pocahontasgif#disney's pocahontas#disney pocahontas#disney john smith#john smith#pocahontas x john smith#(kinda)#girl's got her priorities right tho look at her grabbing him ass-first in that last gif#most important thing to check#queso*gif#queso*edit#for real tho how do people not love this look at them yanking this twunk around by neck and pulling his hair and everything#and him just taking it like a slut. look: he's got almost a whole tiddy out 80% of the time#he's such a damsel i mean lookit this shit#john pomeroy was doing the Most here and we don't appreciate him enough for it#for real: on an animation level they were doing some insane shit with john's face in this movie#this whole was a Bitch to animate according to the directors and it's partly due to these character designs#john and pocahontas especially#and no wonder: fucking hell there's a lot going on here!#pocahontas (1995)
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HI!! I'M REAL SUCKER FOR DISNEY AND PIXAR MOVIES SO IF YOU COULD DO SOMETHING WITH THEM? LIKE DISNEY PRINCESSES OR JUST A MIX OF DISNEY AND PIXAR CHARACTERS HEDCANONS DATING?!! THANK YOU A LOTTT!!!!
i hope you like it! i wanted to give a credit to those forgotten characters because you didn't tell me what specific characters you want so..
Disney/Pixar characters dating hc's
ft. pocahontas, diego, prince philip, aurora, kida, ember lumen, simba, tigress, killian, nod, robyn goodfellowe, belle
༺☆༻
-Pocahontas - Pocahontas
-i see a secret relationship with her, because of her father... so she will sneak out at night to your teepee just to see you and cuddle with you.
-exploring the nature together like hiking hills and mountains, swimming in every river, lake, sea,... while splashing water on each other.
-when you are having trouble falling asleep, she will sing to you, probably a lullaby from her mother or some she wrote for you.
-matching bracelets and it's a BIG deal for her. it's like a promise ring to her so if you take it off (without a good reason!) she will be really upset.
-grandmother Willow wants to meet you so bad but Pocahontas refuses. not because she's ashamed of you or something, but because she talked about you to grandmother Willow so many times so she's scared what grandmother willow might say
-she will pick different types of rocks, feathers, crystals, flowers,... and bring them to you and say something like "this reminds me of you" "this is almost as beautiful as you"
-Ice Age - Diego
-hunting together. he finds it hot when you hunt so he may lose his focus, if you smack him or growl at him; he will snap out of his trance.
-watching after each other all the time. Diego was with the wrong guys from the start so he was always 'alone' even when he was with Soto. when he met Manny and Sid it got better but then Manny met Ellie etc,... so he tends to protect others before him, he puts others before him so when you watch after him and he watches after you it feels right to him, makes him feel safe
-he will tease you A LOT. i mean he's a man AND a cat, what did you expect. so when is winter he will push you on ice or throw you into a snow and when you get angry and start chasing him, he will just laugh because he's stronger then you so in case he can pin you down
-cuddles and a lot of purring. at night, when Diego gets tired he become a huge cuddly cat. you two are alone in your shared cave so he just snuggles to you or put his paw around you. and at day time around Manny and Sid he's the 'tough guy' again.
-when you are mad at him, he will bring small dead animals to you or some flowers or he will do things for you and he will be 'nice' to Sid, Crash and Eddie just so you see how good boyfriend he is and so you can forgive him faster.
-Sleeping Beauty - Prince Philip
-he's a real gentleman. he will hold the door for you, dance with you, read with you, ride a horse with you, take your shoes off, massage your back or feet,....
-riding a horse with you or walking through the royal gardens hand in hand are his two favourite activities to do with you. he loves you a lot and he loves your ideas and opinions (he basically loves how your brain works yk) so when you two are walking through the gardens while talking... he just love it!
-sneaking you inside the castle at night and outside at early morning from the start because of his parents reaction, or he will sneak outside at nigh to your house in town.
-he will bring you flowers at least twice a week because he can. i mean he doesn't have a specific reason for it he just wants to see you smile
-baking with each other! hear me out i feel like he's a huge fan of baking so when you said you can bake, he was SO happy! he will try and help you or he will just watch. for sure he will eat it almost all
-he loves when you touch his hair. it makes him feel safe and it calms him down. he doesn't like back scratches or massages JUST playing with his hair.
-Sleeping Beauty - Aurora
-collect wild strawberries, raspberries, blueberries and other wild fruits. this may sound weird but she loves it. she's with the love of her life; you, she's in nature which she loves so much, also with animals, that's why she loves it so much. it's many things she loves at the same time.
-dancing and singing around the house with each other. she doesn't care if you cannot dance nor sing, you can just swing around and hum with her, and it will make her happy!
-Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather are always giggling and 'running' around while watching you two, telling each other how lucky Aurora is and how cute you two look,...
-they will also make you matching dresses. and yes, they will fight over the smallest things while doing it. the dresses ended up really pretty! it was simple two blue dresses with your initials on the other side of the dress (like under?)
-cooking and baking together. you are also such a good team, when Aurora washes the dishes you dry them, or she mix the ingredience you decorate the cake
-she's also pretty touchy at all times like she will walk behind you in the kitchen and just touch or slightly squeeze you arm/shoulder. also pretty cuddly so mostly at nights she will put her head on your chest and listen to your heartbeat OR she will hug you from behind and put her head in your neck.
-Atlantis: The Lost Empire - Kida
-matching crystal bracelets. she has her blue one and you have the same one just your favourite color. she will kiss your crystal multiple times so when you are sad or feeling lonely and she's not near, you can kiss it like you kiss her, yk
-swimming late at night together. feeling her hands traveling on your body under the water with a smirk because when you relax in her touch and lost focus, she will splash water on you and swim away a bit, just to tease you.
-playing with her hair. she loves it because it kinda reminds her of her mother so it brings her a lot of comfort and when you do it, she's over the moon!
-braiding small braids in her hair which she will have until they unravel.
-she will hunt and you will cook, there is no other way. and she always eats all the food saying how delicious it was and how you are so good, sometimes she will even watch how you prepare the food just so she can see your hands work...
-having her hands ATTACHED to your waist. she just loves it there! and whenever she can, she will squeeze your waist or just put her hands on it.
-Elemental - Ember Lumen
-one of the main reasons she fall in love with you is that when you are near her, she's calm. like it's so weird how you can control her without knowing, so when she was in the shop with her dad she could (and probably will) lose her temper at some customer, but when you are there (talking to her or her mom or anyone else, or no one!) she's calm and relaxed
-she will admire you a lot. it's some kind of habit of her, when she was little she admired her father a lot... now when she's adult, she admires you (and still her father) because you can handle her, and you love her no matter what...
-she will make you ton of things from glass/lava, you have full room of them and you love it! mostly when she has delivery she quickly knock at your door, give you her gift from the glass she handmade and say something like "you look beautiful today, bye" "i love you, bye"
-she also uses the delivery as a way of saying 'nice' things to you, i mean she just gets so nervous around you and she cannot flirt for her own good so...
-at night she loves to fall asleep next to you while holding your hand. she moves a lot in her sleep and she gets 'hot' quickly so she doesn't want to hurt you and she needs a space but she also wants to be near you so holding your hand is the best.
-Lion King - Simba
-he will show you off all the time! i mean you are his mate, his queen, his goddess, his pride so of course he's gonna show you off to everyone.
-he will let you have the first bite. that's a really strong gesture of love because we know that alpha/king male lions eats first, then lionesses and then cubs... but Simba let's you have the first bite and then you eat together.
-he's a flirt and a tease so he will say a lot of cheese things like when you wake up in the morning "you look stunning, my love" following by "god, how lucky i am to have you, love"
-he also craves for your touch. so snuggling his nose in your neck because that's where the most of your natural scent is and just breaths in.
-protective af! like a lot because you are his EVERYTHING, like literally. so he's almost everytime with you, just when you REALLY need privacy he'll leave you alone.
-Sarabi loves you and she often tease her son about how much he loves you etc. which Simba hates but you find it cute how she keeps talking and Simba's rolling his eyes and saying that it's not true.
-Kung Fu Panda - Tigress
-Tigress is pretty tough, so if she falls in love with you; you must be special. i mean she's capable of love and all, she just doesn't focus on that, she's mainly focused on training and kung fu so...
-training together! that's a need, she will make you workout at least twice a week so you can be fit and healthy, if you want more you can train more... if you are sick or on your period you can just sit there and watch her
-she will try to impress you and show off her muscles and skills to you. like a way of proving to you that she can protect you and take care of you, so she can make you feel safe..
-a lots of scratching behind the ear and purring. she loves it! she'll lay on your stomach, wrap her arms around your waist and just cuddle to you while you can scratch her behind her ears.
-master Shifu knew that she's in love with you before she realized! he know his daughter so he was ready for it... maybe he panicked a bit from the start and talked to Oogway first, he calmed him down and the both of them were really supportive and happy for her.
-Mantis, Monkey, Crane, Viper and Po were also really happy for her, and they teased her a lot about it which she than repaid them in training.
-she's also really really protective and possessive. if someone hurt you, she will go FERAL.
-Spies in Disguise - Killian
-Killian is a villain so he is extremely protective of you. Cameras everywhere around the house, tracking your phone and laptop (watch, car,...) so he knows where you are... he also sends your personal bodyguards with you (in case he has a meeting or business.
-he spoils you, A LOT! he often shops with you, to see all those outfits and you smiley face, but there are times when he cannot which mean he'll send you at least 3 bodyguards to protect you (he has like 20 bodyguards watching over you but shh)
-he loves how he can relax when he's near you. often, when he comes home, late, he sits on his huge velvet chair with a red wine while you sit in front of him; talking.
-like i said he spoils you at normal days but on your b-day or valentine's day or christmas!! you have everything you can think of, you look at that thing and he's already paying.
-he doesn't really like when you took his hair, like he doesn't mind but he prefers when you stroke your nails, softly on his arm up and down. that's much better for him.
-Epic - Nod
-Nod is another teaser. he will gently poke your waist or gently pinch your arm and laugh everytime you slap his hand but when you aren't looking he will whisper "ow" under his nose.
-his father loves you, he thinks that you keep Nod calm and focused on many thing, which he needs.
-he'll race you through the forest on your hummingbirds and when he wins he'll brag about it for a week and if you win, he'll also brag about it to others how awesome his girlfriend is.
-i feel like he loves dancing so he will dance with you around, mostly on the balcony of your shared bedroom, mostly at middle of the night.
-he's keeping an eye on you every single second. always when you are near him and not right next to him, he'll turn to look at you from time to time just to make sure you are safe.
-when you two are cuddling, he'll probably lay his head on your chest and make you play with his hair or he'll make you to lay on his chest so he can play with your hair, it just depends on his mood.
-Wolfwalkers - Robyn Goodfellowe
-Robyn will want to be with you every single minute she can, because she loves you so much! i believe that it takes her some time to fall in love and deeply care about someone, you also have to be a bit "special" to her to fall in love, but when she does, she loves deeply and strongly
-she's a hunter, in her human body or wolf form, doesn't matter she's a hunter, hunter blood runs through her veins, so you two will spend a lot of time in the forest just hanging around...
-Mebh will be a little suspicious about you from the start but eventually she will like you and she's just happy that Robyn is happy, same with Robyn's father and Moll.
-she trusts you a lot, so she will show you her wolf form and even tell you that she's a wolfwalker. she loves when you scratch her behind her ear or just stroke her fur.
-if you're a wolfwalker as well then you two are running through the woods all the time.
-Robyn love when you braid her hair. you can make her two braids and she'll fall asleep with them or you can make her a pony-tail and she'll hunt with it,..
-Beauty and the Beast - Belle
-Belle is really loving person but she's introvert, which means she needs a time to open herself truly. i mean she'll share many stuff with you but after some time she'll share some deep thoughts and stuff like that.
-you two will have "your talks" every single saturday. it means that you two sit on a picnic blanket outside or near the fireplace inside (depends on the weather) and talk about books you've read and gossip and just talk about everything.
-she will mark every sentence or word that she finds amazing like "kiss me until i'm sick of it" and the say it to you.
-she can be shy but that doesn't mean she cannot flirt and you'd be surprise from the start that she can flirt like this with just a giggle
-Belle loves touching you. braiding your hair, stroking your hand with her thumb, kissing your shoulder... doesn't really matter, she's just touch starved
-reading to each other. if one of you cannot fall asleep because of any reason, the other one will read 'till falling asleep. she finds it really comforting because she loves your voice.
#sivyera's masterlist#sivyera#x reader#fluff#sivyera request#sivyera masterlist#disney#pixar#disney x reader#pixar x reader#disney characters x reader#disney/pixar characters x reader#pocahontas x reader#dating pocahontas#pocahontas#pocahontas x fem!reader#pocahontas x fem reader#ice age x reader#ice age diego x reader#diego x reader#dating diego ice age#ice age diego x fem reader#sleeping beauty x reader#sleeping beauty 1959#sleeping beauty 1959 x reader#prince philip x reader#sleeping beauty prince philip x reader#sleeping beauty philip x reader#sleeping beauty prince x reader#aurora x reader
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Just A Cartoon
I really wanted to do a Dadster and babybones type thing.
In my Physics class we have been analyzing animations to practice calculating height and velocity and stuff. I learned that the cliff Pocahontas jumps off in the Disney movie is approximately 500 meters tall, meaning she was going about 200 miles per hour when she hit the water.
I've been putting Gaster into my science teachers' shoes, so expect more Gaster comics inspired by them.
Undertale belongs to Toby Fox
#undertale#gaster#sans#papyrus#dadster#babybones#my art#physics#cartoons#you should see my family overanalyze dumb kids shows#gaster would not let his children watch such blatantly wrong stuff#papyrus with his fluffy bunny#first time drawing babybones. planning on doing it again.#i gave up on drawing gaster's hand#ignore it
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Hello, brazilian anon here! So I have been following criticisms of LO for a while now, and Psyche and Eros caught my attention in special, because their relationship is legit a racist trope commonly applied to indigenous people: Woman of color is put in a arranged marriage or pressured into marrying a guy from her village/tribe but "falls in love" with a white dude who "saves" her from her abusive and "uncivilized" family. Think of Disney's Pocahontas. This trope is commonly used to dehumanize non-european/anglo-saxon cultures and portray them as barbaric, and is rooted in colonialism and its direct heir, imperialism, as a means for colonizers to justify and sugarcoat raping and forcing women of color to marry them. So not a good look for Rachel.
OH YEAH IT IS
(you just opened Pandora's Box by mentioning Pocahontas around me LMAO)
It's even more egregious when you consider how Rachel changed the original myth from Psyche undergoing trials on her own to her ... being turned into a nymph servant for Aphrodite. Like huh. Is that really your final draft, Rachel? Have you thought this through?
I made a very spicy post about this like a year and a half ago and honestly I think it's still worth talking about because it's incredibly telling that Psyche had her entire story uprooted and replaced with a version where she's transformed into a non-POC character to disguise herself as a servant to a woman who's already racist towards nymphs. It's got that issue of "take the black character and transform them into an animal/other being that isn't black so that we don't have to have a black character onscreen for more than 10 minutes."
And yeah, you can tell how much Rachel is absentmindedly taking from Disney without challenging what those stories were portraying or asking deeper questions to get to the heart of their messaging. Pocahontas is rightfully panned for being a very white-washed version of a story that was written in the blood shed by Native Americans at the hands of colonizers. "Pocahontas" herself, even, was not some independent native woman who fell in love with the "one good white guy" on the boat, she was a teenage girl, whose life was spared but made worse when she was forced to travel overseas to be used as a prop to justify their continued actions in murdering and colonizing the "savages" overseas; she was then forced into marriage and had to carry the children of her captors, all while being treated as an exotic spectacle by the people around her who would undoubtedly kill her at the first sign of disobedience.
Her name was Matoaka. Her life and story is not something that should be romanticized. It's a tragedy and much of what instigated it is still alive and well today. She only lived to be 21.
I don't know if Rachel intentionally referenced or ripped off Pocahontas in Lore Olympus the same way she clearly has with Hercules and Beauty and the Beast. But it's incredibly telling in how she treats the racial divide between nymphs and gods and how she's twisted the Eros x Psyche myth into what it is that even if she did watch Pocahontas, she probably never realized how problematic it is at its core in the way that it's told.
In the original myth, Psyche is a woman who's meant to represent the fickleness of vanity - the loneliness it can make one feel to be admired and not truly loved, and the destruction that can be brought about in jealousy - and her pursuit in finding genuine love in Eros, a journey she travels alone, thematically with the rest of the story.
In Lore Olympus, she's an illiterate woman of color whose only purpose is to be Eros' wife, robbed of all agency so that she can be a trophy for him to earn, a test for him to pass. It's boring and really icky when you really peel back the layers of it with Psyche's character design in mind. Even when she finally does get more agency in her task to bring down Apollo - or at the very least, keep an eye on him - it's still at the behest of Zeus who gives her immortality not as a reward for overcoming the trials she set out to pass, but so she can be his errand boy. So once again she's not capable of doing anything motivated by her own best interests (especially when she already knows how dangerous Apollo is, why is she the one who has to follow this guy around?)
So yeah, no, not a good look at all LMAO
#lore olympus critical#anti lore olympus#lo critical#ask me anything#ama#anon ama#anon ask me anything
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My frustration with Asha's writing
A lot of people liked "Wish," and a lot of people didn't, and a particular concern for the latter was the main protagonist. Since I'm in the camp of "I'm frustrated with 'Wish,'" I'll discuss a little bit about why Asha feels like such a letdown.
She's an archetype, but not an individualized character. She screams "Disney heroine," but she doesn't have anything about her that makes her character stand out (positively) among other Disey female leads. She has no flaws that hinder her, and her positive traits are vague at best. "I care too much," is the most generic thing I've ever heard a main character say. In fact, it becomes almost meaningless when a character (who genuinely means it) says it about themselves; caring too much is a statement that works best when talking about someone else. In fact...
2. She has significant plot armor. She gets far in the process of being considered to be Magnifico's apprentice, but it's never said WHY. Considering her friend (or friends? I'm not sure) works in the castle, Dahlia putting in a good word for Asha would make sense to why Magnifico would consider her, and even him asking around town for their opinion of her would make more sense. But it feels like she gets so far in the process simply because she's the main character, despite Magnifico knowing next to nothing about her. And Magnifico has several magical powers at his disposal, but he's still defeated by her (mainly because he only uses his staff against her).
3. She has a lot of influence, but again, it's not really said how or why. During the reprise of "This Wish," the people of Rosas side with her against Magnifico--but this is likely because she's the only one who dared to stand up against him. We only see Asha interact with the people of Rosas during the opening song with her as a tour guide (how did she get THAT job?), and it feels very professional, very timed. It doesn't feel intimate or personal, like Asha has built up a good rapport with the other citizens.
4. Her family is poorly defined. Sabino's wish is to create a song that inspires the next generation, but as Magnifico himself mentions, that's a vague wish--plus imo, it's cheating; rather than working hard and creating a legacy for yourself, you want to wish to give something for people to remember you by. And Sabino is obviously older than Magnifico, but his life--and how he lived it without the kingdom of wishes--is never explored. Perhaps if it was explained that he experienced great hardship and his spirit was broken, it'd explain why he was so fixated on getting a wish. And Sakina's wish is never explained. She's probably the worst-characterized parent in a 21st century Disney movie, since she's pretty much just there. And Asha's father inspired her, but he isn't shown much. I'd have enjoyed it if the plot revolved around her trying to revive her father and it proves Magnifico's point that some wishes can't/shouldn't be granted.
5. She learns NOTHING. Her whole song is about "I've lived a lie" when that's not entirely true; she takes a very black and white view on the situation without ever trying to evolve her viewpoint via Magnifico's perspective, and the people of Rosas never stop to think "we shouldn't be codependent"; they just think "we shouldn't have let Magnifico lie to us." It's a giant avoidance of guilt on everyone's behalf, and since Magnifico is a villain, no one really cares that he has some semblance of a point. When you look at protagonists like Pocahontas, Judy Hopps, and Anna, you see how they learned a new way of looking at things, that they've suffered hardships (either through their own making or otherwise) and that they've grown from it.
6. She's "relateable." Disney's adorkable thing hasn't been too much of an issue for me up to this point; it was unique when Anna did it, and it never feels super cringey with Mirabel and Moana (though if Mirabel is cringey, it fits into the narrative). But now it's tired. I'd enjoy more mature leads like Raya, Tiana, and Elsa, rather than Disney trying to make a protagonist that tries--and fails--to be quirky. And I never really saw Rapunzel as adorkable as her later leading ladies. But Asha tries too hard; honestly that should've been one of her flaws in the film. Her desperation to meet everyone's approval would've been something neat (albeit familiar if we compare her to Mirabel) to explore in the film.
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