#I mean everyone like smiling friends
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I'm noticing that [adult swim] is getting more female-oriented nowadays. yolo, birdgirl, them rescuing tuca and bertie, unicorn warriors eternal having a female lead and romantic subplot, my adventures with superman pretty much being a shojo, sailor moon airing on the toonami rewind block, invincible fight girl, women wearing shoulder pads.
considering that Mike Lazzo infamously said that women aren't funny and refused to hire them, I see this an absolute win. he must be sooooo angry right now lol
#even smiling friends is popular with the fujos#I mean everyone like smiling friends#but when the fujos are making yaoi fanart of it you know you've won#they're the backbone of a bunch of fandoms let's face it#why else do you think they put Charlie in a maid outfit?#to thank their fujo fanbase duh#adult swim#toonami#yolo crystal fantasy#yolo silver destiny#birdgirl#tuca and bertie#unicorn warriors eternal#my adventures with superman#sailor moon#invincible fight girl#women wearing shoulder pads
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lately ive been thinking about the contrast going on in Early Lime where hes like "tbh im pretty sure i could have any girl i wanted including mochi i mean i guess if she wanted we could give it a shot one day but i dont really care lol" and then very easily becoming completely unhinged for her the second he gets a tinge of romantic affection
#lime: yeah mochis not a huge deal i mean were friends#af (after affection) lime: *needs to dunk his head in the sink at least once a week trying to snap himself out of thinking about her*#anyway. its been a while since them i miss them#my recent development is taking away limes mochi cuddle time#it makes more sense for the slow burn if he cant cuddle with her whenever he wants#starve him#lime: (why would i like her shes so plain shouldnt i be with like some supermodel or something ??)#lime: (the kind of person everyone wants but cant have??)#also lime when mochi smiles at him: (i want to kiss the shit out of you)#i think there something about limes family where being a goldwood means being expected to be a cut above#where its ingrained they should only be/settle for the best of the best#so lime catching feelings for this (pre-reveal) very normal and plain forgettable girl that no one else seems to give a shit about..#...is a struggle for him#tiramisu thinks its laughable because the goldwoods arent part of the magic community#she thinks its hilarious how they are lowkey obsessed with being successful and top-notch when they literally have no idea whats going on#i dont think the goldwoods are even especially rich#maybe its just one of those (parents being hard on you so you can have a better life than they did) kind of things#but they are known to be a well-connected and beautiful family#any goldwood you meet i the prettiest person youve ever seen#i wonder if they were disappointed or proud of lime when they found out he joined the capitol guard#his sister became a dentist#maybe it was one of those (why would you join the military...youre going to struggle...)#and then he tells them his paycheck and all of a sudden theyre like (we're so proud!!!)#(the capitol guard in general has pretty normal pay but the m-34th gets way more as a specialized unit)
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I hate work
#igm.talk#chey is back in depression mode!!! we cheered#depression mode means i have no energy to do anything 👍🏻#tmr im going to the beach with my best friends after work for a picnic and when we planned this a month ago i was so excited#and now i dont want to get out of bed tmr#bc the thought of having to go to work and then fake a smile all throughout the night is exhausting#but rescheduling also isnt an option bc the perks of adulthood is having maybe 1 day every 7 months where everyone is able to meet#but anyways about work - it sucks being the new kid and it sucks even worse when im younger than everyone else#when everyone else chats they'll talk about their kids and stuff and im here single and childless so ofc idk how to relate to them#and 90% of the staff are chinese and they all ignore me bc i look like a different race (we can all speak english tho so idk whats the issue#but when i speak to them in chinese they suddenly make a 180 and are SOOOOOOO nice to me?? complimenting me and shit??#and this has been a thing in every fucking job I've ever had like the racism is so obvious#i hate it so much#like between the racism and the loneliness and being underpaid im genuinely considering quitting#but at the same time i dont wanna be that kid who quit after 2 weeks... like i cant commit or something#and the company is 20mins away from my house and it's a 4.5 day work week so there are those perks...#but i legitimately dont know how long i can keep this up#pls can they hire another young person or at least treat me like a human being and not a statue or smtg...#im sorry for the rant i just really needed an outlet and i dont have anyone to go to irl 😞
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Breathing into a paperbag thinking about the possibility of Elbaf digging the conflict from Water 7 back up again and maybe exploring some long-term repercussions of Luffy and Usopp’s fight that not even they themselves were aware of and and and and and-
LISTEN. the Water 7 Saga absolutely rewired the way I understood the crew and how each member views themselves and the roles they play. And it’s been some time since the Strawhat’s exploration of the New World has allowed them to really take time and consider themselves and each other like that again.
And Elbaf just sounds (MUAH) like such a wonderful opportunity to do exactly that, it sounds perfect, primarily in the way it ties all the way back to the Strawhat’s early days on the Grand Line. And when you look at the presence of the Giant Pirates in Little Garden and Enies Lobby, what they share is that both times the Giants Served the purpose mirroring the conflicts between the crewmates and highlighting the importance of loyalty and comradery. Shit writes itself. Come on Elbaf don’t let me down. Come on Usopp I know you can hit us with another world shattering arc just take the stage love.
#remember when Dorry and Brogy’s story served to introduce us to Zoro and Sanji’s rivalry#by showing that even though they fight constantly theyd break if they lost each other and deep down they are still crew#and now we have an unresolved death pact looming over the two of them#Remember when Kashi and Oimo taught Usopp that the cost of loyalty can b great and harrowing but it is beyond rewarding for the right perso#just when he was doubting wether he was truly strong enough to stand at Luffy’s side or at all capable of the bravery needed to be a pirate#and now he’s going to have to look these friends and allies in the eye and be the one to show them all that his decision to remain-#-a Strawhat has brought him#when asked to look at his journey so far and ask himself if he’s truly reached his ideals will he be able to smile wide and say yes?#or will the seeds of doubt and anxiety start planting themselves in his heart again?#hell you know what would be rlly cool for me. If throughout this arc EVERYONE began losing themselves to their own doubts BUT him#Like okay okay thats an exaggeration but do you get what I mean?#Usopp staying calm and collecting and making tough calls and getting back up again all without realizing-#-that he’s truly acting like the Captain he always wanted to be#thatd be so good. god i hope this upcoming arc hits harder than crack#one piece#elbaf#usopp#monkey d. luffy#strawhat pirates
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now my least favourite part of fandom– people policing other fans reactions to things
#not to be all mean girls ‘i wish i could bake a cake of rainbows and smiles’#but it would be nice to enjoy these final moments of the series with more kindness#if someone loved ep: that’s cool#if someone hated it or was disappointed: that’s cool too#we should all feel welcome to express our feelings authentically <3#anyway i hate discourse so no further posts from me about this 🤠#you’re all my friends and i like hearing everyone’s opinions on an episode#can we focus on the real enemy: the executives who cancelled our show 😤#d stuff
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this last image contains the look of a man who knows he's broken down someone's walls.
#jcw is handsome#but my god seungho is not#i cannot explain it#he is scrappy and dirty-looking and always looks like he's drunk#not to mention he walks like a drowsy spider#i mean it's sexy in a dirty way but it's also the kind of way that...#you know when you have a crush on a guy with no future and you can't admit it to your friends?#that's the feel i get from seungho#scruffy: THAT'S THE WORD I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR#he is so scruffy#and yet!!!! he's got the whole of the gangnam union wrapped around his finger#well everyone except jungbae#jungbae sees right through seungho's bullshit#but poor chief seo#seungho has got seo blushing and smiling like a teenager#the heartbreak will be hard on this one#the worst of evil
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Romarriche - “Your company is one of a kind… I would never lie to you. I would never say a half-truth or be quiet.” “What is it in your mind, Merold?” “Hearing your voice, complaint or not—it is music to me either way.” Merold - “If there is one constant in this world… Let it be you.” “You’re the cruelest and the kindest thing that happened to me.” “…If only you continued to look at me like that.” Romarriche - “…Merold?” Merold - “But~ It’s only a minor case of bad-mood-itis.” “So Romarriche, spoil me with a spar, will you?” Romarriche - “Merold.” Romarriche - “Look at me.” Merold - “…” Romarriche - “Is something… Wrong?” Merold - “Instead of a spar…” “I might want to lie down on your lap after all.”
#fragaria memories#merold#romarriche#i wont lie i only had the first line and wanted to write something with it#i was reading this novel and i wanted to write something romantic </3#im gonna babble here on my own so you're always free to skip the tags...#if i remember correctly romarriche and merold were made knights around the same time and I work on that context#i like to think their relationship was rocky at first at romarriche's side who didn't want to befriend merold#compared to merold who thought he finally had a friend his age that was also a knight of fragaria#it was romarriche who looked at merold with a perceived perfection and was compared to him#“...I'll get better and strong. I'll impress everyone so I don't have to hear it--his name repeating over and over again.”#merold who says “if only you continued to look at me like that...” refers back to the past when romarriche didn't think of him favorably#but i like the double meaning to it “please look me as you did before and look at me as you do now”#“cruelest” and “kindest” i was a reading a novel that also used those words so I kinda grabbed from that </3#its really a cute novel though#me reading fragaria memories theories to see if it can at least make sense#i like this but i dont like this at the same time wwww#what does it say about its characters? as a writer i want to care about that because no dialogue should be said without reason#i think this dialogue is perfection but what am i writing this for? who does it refer it? what does it refer to?#but at the end of the day i simply want to indulge myself#something that could sound good and personal and something that could make people who read this smile and myself smile#Merold - “Will you make the promise to never change?”#Romarriche - “Change... But change in what way?”#Merold - “...”#Merold - “Because I'm a knight who fears a lot of things...”#Merold - “And I care about the Romarriche I have now.”#it was never supposed to be detailed but look at me now... </3
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but seriously if you're taking inspiration from emma for your story/characterisation and you DONT make them good friends who seek eachother out constantly . then you've simply missed the point
#like i get that its a thread and everyones feels for it will be different but they are not rivials or enemies to lovers theyre FRIENDS#ik ik they argue and the fight and they bicker and it's serious even!! but they are FRIENDS they want eachother around constantly!!#emma jane austen about love meaning i want to see you be better not because i dont love you like this but bc i know you want to be better#and i believe you can be. love meaning. i will be there in every change you make. meaning i want to be the one you argue with#meaning IM the friend you want to prove wrong.#also emma where mr knightley is overly grumpy and cross 🙄🙄🙄 guys he smiles so much. every other mr knightley description is just#he looks over and smiles at her. hes laughing at something she said. hes smirking. hes smiling knowingly. hes smiling at her father#hes friendly! and thats paet of why it works imo. be its so obvious how much he wants to be around her and she knows that from the start#so when they fight its like. but they both know the love is still there!#which is WHY the box hill fight is so shocking. bc it feels like suddenly a channel that has always been open between them is closed.#its whatever it doesnt matter#but you cant just have them bicker to lovers they have to be FRIENDS#what about all the times theyre not bickering. what about all the shared sly comments. what about their crazy honesty#like genuinely they're so open to eachother they will ANSWER eachothers questions#what about all the ways emma makes things more comfortable for knightley and vise versa. theyre so FRIENDS. man theyre so friends#its totally whatever but its also deadly serious to me.
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they should make a life where you don't have appointments, work, school and scheduled events every single day for months on end
#i just wanna spend like 2 full days rotting in bed is that too much to ask#december i'm going on a vacation with family + gf and we're trying to schedule a lunch/dinner so that we can go over the itinerery#and other stuff like my gf is diabetic so she's going to tell everyone the procedures in case of an emergency etc#and the soonest i'm available for that is oct 20th like bruh#every week day i've got classes 7:30-11:50 work 13:00-17:00 and then gym therapy or futsal practice at night#oh and sometimes the professor that i'm the student assistant (? monitor in pt) for wants me to go to her night classes#and then on weekends i've got futsal practice sat morning usually a match either saturday or sunday legal advice clinic 4x a semester#and then birthdays friend group meetups (with ppl i haven't properly seen in a WHILE so i don't wanna bail) family stuff or gf's family stu#oh and i take care of the finances of our futsal team so there's that as well#and then when i'm free i spend my time with my love (who i mostly see on either day of the weekend and sometimes for dinner on weekdays)#those are my favorite “appointments” i love spending time with her so much but even though we have quite a few staying in dates we also#pretty frequently go out to cafes restaurants parks meet up with mutual friends etc#so like... no bed rotting ever adfdsal#honestly i am not THAT busy compared to some ppl that i know#like i work from home most days of the week commute only 20 min to college am not a part of any study group etc etc#but man... that vyvense sure is working cause i do not think i would be able to do what i do now when my adhd was unmedicated#also i'm thinking of maybe getting a new internship next year cause even though i love my current one it's in public law which atm#is the field i'm thinking of getting into after school but getting into private law in brazil with only public law uni experience is#incredibly difficult. so i wanna be 100% sure i actually want public law. which means experiencing private law.#which means a private law internship#so i'm wondering how the fuck imma be able to pull that off next year#at least it pays much more than my current one! like probably double!#but honestly even with all the shit that i do and wishing i had more time for myself i've actually been so happy lately#i'm learning more at uni than i used to be able to i do pretty well at my internship i've got wonderful friends both old and new#my family is well and we get along like always i switched positions in futsal and am doing suprisingly good as a goalkeeper#and i'm in my first ever relationship. it's been almost 8 months till we made it official and it blows me away how good it's been#like we haven't faught once. disagreed on a couple things sure. but not a single fight and tbh even disagreements are very rare#idk we communicate and give each other grace and i just feel so loved. she knows me so well. i love her so so so so much.#like man just this saturday we were having an early dinner at a bakery. she stopped what she was saying and just stared at me smiling#and like i couldn't hold eye contact. cause she's so so fucking beautiful and she was looking at me with so much love and i had to look awa
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it's the fact that i like a guy who lives 100m down the road from me but i only see him for about 5 seconds every week and find it really hard to just go up and talk to him even though i've known him for just over 7 years now and we have multiple mutual friends and have done multiple insane trips together and last week slept like 5cm away from each other and whenever we make eye contact it never makes me feel like i want to crawl into the ground and never see a human ever again like usual but he looks at me in a way that makes me want to smile for an eternity and yet i still can't start a fucking conversation with him without someone else there
ahhhhhh
#at least he smiles at me when we see eachother#but conversations just wont conversation#and his sister is really nice#and we do two of the same a-levels#i did have to pretend to slit his throat a few days ago#for a bit#he's acting in this horror comedy i'm making#i had to defend him to my dad the other day though#my dad now knows who he is because he gave us and another friend a lift into town#other than me mentioning him occasionally#and I think he asked my brother about him for some reason#i mean they do go to the same school#and my brother said he was a bit usless#which i can understand from the context that my brother knows him (not just school)#but my dad was all like yeah he's useless i bet you don't like him at all#and i was like#huh?#he's actually very nice#and smart#and social anxiety is a a thing#so he's probably not going to seem the most confident person to someone like my brother#who is very outgoing#and the kind of person who everyone finds annoying at some point#so my brother has probably not got the best read on this guy#but yeah#i like him quite a bit if you can't tell
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Sometimes I just sit here like. Wow the k///h fandom really fucked me up lol
#I'm mostly there but. i don't think it'll ever fully leave me y'know?#that fandom was a massive headache to be in. especially the side of it for shipping Those Two Boys. i was there but it fucked me up so much#people were always so mean spirited and cruel and willing to laugh and chat shit about anyone who disagreed with them#or were publicly into really weird shit and spun it around horrifically whenever called it#or calling other queer ppl and genuine allies homophobic for not liking their ship#once i saw someone declare it misogynistic to not like their mlm ship 'because mostly women like it' which was uhh. 😬#and then there was the like. having to smile and pretend everything was fine around people you Really Didn't Like#bc otherwise somebody would notice and everyone would be talking behind your back#and spreading lies and nasty rumours that even people you were supposedly friends with would just. believe without question#(which DID happen to me btw!!!!#and when a friend showed me they immediately began stalking said friend till they chased them out of the fandom)#they couldn't even get the damn ship right. always painfully ooc and boring and lame. i was a huge shipper of it but#i think nowadays its tainted that ship and that kinda dynamic for me a lot#weirdly venting on the dash today but. hmm. i keep thinking about it#i have to super super trust people w that ship to enjoy anything remotely to do w it now lol
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Ngl youtube videos suddenly got me slowly turning into a Justin Russo hater.
#like mainly later seasons him#early seasons him is fine#but like i guess plot wise you could argue he becomes more iffy because you know the competition will be soon#and justin does want to become the family wizard#as for some reason this show still never fully tackled the fucked up shit of the idea that wizard siblings have to grow up studying magic#only for one or two or whatever number siblings to lose it to one sibling in a competition#like stevie was the closest we got to that#but like it still dont make it less bad with how justin was#like the worst example i can name is him literally refusing to save alex whose his sister btw and shes always dropped shit to save him#because he wants to project onto her that she purposely fucked up his chances to get back into the competition via#pushing the students to take the test only for them to be failed because bad guy being bad guy in reality#and basically blames her for the failure and such as a result and acts like its all an act when she is mad on the students behalf and shit#and his students have to drag him kicking and screaming just to save her from the bad guy's shit#and there's also the competition itself where harper and zeke get grabbed by a creature during it#but alex has to convince her brothers to save the two and thats just cold already on justins end with zeke#but cause they took too long they all lose the competition and magic#and both brothers especially justin proceed to treat alex like shit even during work hours meaning#fucking over family business just to get at alex#and when the dad ultimately almost sells the place justin STILL blames alex#like she was the only one working fully max was being max and justin was being a little bitch to her#aka the infamous refusing to make her orders only max's and when he does he throws the sandwich at her#and cause she was holding drinks at the time and didnt see it coming the drinks went on a customer#and also throwing table trash into her already full bin shes carrying around while cleaning tables#and therefore messing it up for her like#and alex's logo...well from sounds of shit thats just justin again being a hateful bitch to his sister with zero consquiences#even one commenter pointing how he sadistically smiled while telling her all her friends hate her#like dear god if the show was doing this to make everyone root for alex its working i hate later season justin#gonna be interesting if hes matured or not as an adult
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waittt the datz shown to hang and be silly w faitah and beh'leeb at post soj implies things At least if you have the gay goggles on cus i refuse to live in a datz/beh'leeb world but also they are both grieving immensely so its just not The Time but its like a behavior pattern for datz....he sees grieving single parent he sticks his fat head in to help out...its in his nature.... but this means the raising aj and yuty came first. over the crush on dhurke. His motives were simply to help a bestie out...the feelings crept in later over the span of years silently slowly..... This Will Affect The Dhurkedatz Meta
#it wont bc this is already what i believed but its still fun to say.#Which i mean technically the grieving didnt stop datz from getting crushy crushy first time w dhurke BUT#......Smiles idc#i cant ship datz with any woman Like out of principle#this time they really ARE just good friends#besides...even in a dhurke au... datz would still help her i just know it#I mean tbh i cant imagine shes hurting for help necessarily but. funny uncle ok?#like as opposed to with dhurke where it was like. everyone turned against him#beh'leeb probably has friends... and the rebels...#but datz will be there among the friends and rebels. and their friendship will grow for it...#Yippee#good mornibg
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what do i have to do to get people to read my stuff actually like im not about to get in everyones faces begging for attention but i dont understand how im expected to make FREE fandom content without much feedback on my work
#ignore my ranting but im actually so fucked disillusioned#like why are there so many people who scream about supporting each other and lifting up small creators#and they never do it themselves unless its their friend#sorry i dont sit at the popular table but i never expected that it would impact my reach this much#my newest fic has more hits but less kudos and less comments than my first#it's so obvious people only interacted on my first fic *because* it was my first fic#and thank you so fucking much to the people who have given me kind words#and literally religiously rbing my stuff because you think im worth listening to#this isn't about me crying because im not popular#people with bigger followings are naturally going to get more attention#but the only reason ive started posting my fics is because all these POPULAR BLOGS were like 'we support each other here!!!'#'were a big family were not a big fandom so any time someone posts it brings a smile to our faces!' blah blah blah#like youre out here lying for clout you literally only leave feed or kudos if its your fucking friend 😭 not even if its good#i guess id rather have less people interacting if it means the feedback i get is genuine and not just blowing smoke up my ass#but it still hurts to write a fic that flops and then write another fic thats over 3x longer than my first fic#WITH A PREMISE THAT POPULAR WRITERS HAVE WRITTEN ABOUT BEFORE AND BLEW UP FOR IT AND PEOPLE IDOLIZE THEIR WRITING#so im expecting to get more feedback and constructive criticism because it's a concept that a lot of people seem to love#only to get EVEN LESS FEEDBACK THAN ON MY FIRST FIC#like sorry to everyone who genuinely likes my writing i actually love you so much#but im very rejection sensitive and don't plan on continuing this. it seriously hurts me. it triggers my abandonment and selfhatred shit ba#like im sick to my stomach that another thing im passionate about is sucking the life out of me & i cant even get my foot in the door#donut rebagel this thanks and goodbye
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. anyway after writing the tags 4 this post i told my research partner i will no longer follow his dreams lmao. still helping w it but i need to engage in research that i find satisfying
#i think ive been waiting for something for a while and i will spend the next year waiting for it too#i thought i felt panic but i have decided to read it as anticipation. the thrill of rejection or of moving forward or the latter as#a result of the former. i left you with your backpack unattended in the cafe because on fridays i am done#putting my life on hold for another whim-without-a-warning#this cross country service is delayed by 26 minutes so i will grab a bucket and start shovelling the water away from the tracks#everyone is moving on in some different way and im sorry if you think im mean for telling you getting so drunk will disable you from#recording your brainwaves effectively but it seems like you think i owe you an awful lot. one year ago in four days my friend got me hegel's#science of logic for my birthday and i thanked him for proving to me the existence of things this is what i do he said#and then he will spend the rest of his life breathing philosophy and i dont want to spend the rest of my life#breathing someone elses dreams i wait for the moment of realisation. this is now a 30 minute delay. i was supposed to worship beautiful#things and that is what i will do. i think i have a best friend and i know i have a lover and i know to#restrict my love the way you have. im sorry. i hope you understand when i tell you. i am now sitting on the floor in the luggage section of#this incredibly busy train and i saw a photo of her with her boyfriend and her hair in braids smiling like a fool this is the#except a week ago you told me you almost took too much this time to live. you are a beautiful girl with a beautiful soul and you know you#have already changed the world and it somehow was not enough. now you are smiling without any makeup on next to him#and yesterday you cried in an airport in the states when you were too full of love. this is the most extraordinary human being i have met.#tomorrow he heads off to princeton while his best friend heads to harvard. he goes there to make the world a better place. he is the most#extraordinary person i have ever met. the issue with human beings is that we are incredibly good at almost dying and keeping going.#you try to kill yourself and publish a paper and give a talk. you negotiate the seperation between your own parents and submit another#phd application. i am surrounded by extraordinary people with extraordinary minds and incredibly broken happy hearts.#i only see you smile when you talk about robotics. i still dont know how manifolds work and i love the concept anyway. i dont know.#i do know that i refuse to live unsatisfied.#you can keep drinking. im going to drink this reality up#i think i was a horrible person and i refuse to engage with that mentality again no matter what it takes.
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I just do not understand the prevalence of identity policing. I just do not. It reeks so badly of insecurity. An army of teenagers pretending to know more about the human brain than any scientist on earth and spouting transmed rhetoric in system paint is never going to fail to flabbergast me. The groups are so in-policing of themselves they fail to see that they're the only ones going around and doing the one thing they don't want done to them. It's so.
#I SAY THIS WITH A DISORDER!!!!! [EXPLODES EVERYONE ABOUT TO FAKECLAIM ME FOR DARING TO NOT BE AN ASS]#my once every time someone pisses me off reminder#that even in a world where you really do need a disorder to be a system you are still wrong for shutting out endos#bc you are inevitably shutting out ppl who are 'real'#but that's how it's supposed to work right?#if you're supportive than you must be one of 'them' and be rejected right? smiles#you cant support the other. that means you're the other too. because you prove the bigots wrong by existing. and they cant have that now.#totally not something that happens in the real world like. I don't know. the queer community?#where we all know and agree it is bad and a tool to uphold bigotry?#but nobody likes to think right#anyway. you're scared of your friends girl go join an endo server and stop being held down by ppl who will drop u like nothing#phlyaros' nonsense
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