5queerducksinatrenchcoat

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

Rip Howl Pendragon, you would’ve loved Korean skincare.

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

well it finally happened

so my dad is almost 80, this man's been making Spirk content since Star Trek started airing basically

he never knew ao3 existed, he just thought people stopped writing fanfic when ff.net died, like it was a fad that had outgrown him or smth

he clicked an ao3 link in my pinned last night, realizing that they were in fact clickable

he's mad at me for not telling him earlier. "I don't have a lot of years left in me and there's so much to read"

he's gonna spend his whole retirement reading trek fanfic now jesus christ

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

I just think it's kinda funny if Rook is a Grey Warden mage given Varric's experience with them in both DA2 and DAI. Truly a wildcard.

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

the menswear guy added mr beast to his kill count

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

So I tend to put on a youtube video most nights to fall asleep to (laptop on a shutdown timer.) And lately, my recommendations are a lot of videogame speedruns or videogame hidden facts.

Last night I pulled up youtube and got a "I played the 10 worst wii games ever" kind of video. ~30 minutes long. Fair enough! Show me the terrible wii games.

I'm paying attention for the beginning, since hey I'm still awake. And maybe like, 6 minutes into the video the guy starts going into heavy detail about how to pirate and copy wii games.

And I'm like, shit, bold, considering this video has 500,000 views. Bravo and all that.

The terrible wii games go on. I fall asleep.

I wake up to the sound of like... mechanical grinding?

Look at the laptop. There's a guy in a hazmat suit mixing dangerous chemicals, going "hey don't mix these dangerous chemicals."

I'm like, "Oh, the video ended. And the algorithm put me on... chemical mixing Youtube I guess."

I look at the video Title. "I Played The Worst Wii Games Ever Made"

....Oh.

It's still the video.

So surely he is... mixing chemicals to clean off an unplayable wii disk? Trying to touch up the lone copy of some forgotten game bought off ebay?

No...

He's just.

Mixing chemicals.

I hover over the video sections.

The 10 worst wii game sections have ended. He played them all.

The last 10 minutes is just dedicated to... him in a hazmat suit mixing dangerous chemicals.

....????

I fall back asleep.

....

I need to go back and check this video to make sure I did not imagine this all in a half-asleep stupor

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

I see people talking about the idea that Teia and Rook commiserated over the challenges of dating Antivan men and I raise you, it is actually Teia and Lucanis commiserate over the challenges of dating De Rivas and their love of puns.

Teia: It is a miracle they have survived so long

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

last night my partner held a somber little passover seder to show me what it’s about and when they got to the part where they were supposed to open the door for elijah they paused, frowned, and said “oh. huh. there is a clown.” and I looked out. and sure enough. there was a clown.

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

Lucanis: Teia! Crow!Rook is pregnant! I'm so excited to be a father, but a little nervous too, what if I'm not a good da...

Lucanis: ... why do I hear boss music?

Teia: I would start running if I were you.

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

I actually think Davrin's death would have been more heartbreaking if Assan didn't die with him. You take over caring for a piece of Davrin's legacy and have to learn how to cope with the loss with Assan. You build Davrin a statue in Arlathan amongst the ruins of the statues of old, dead Elven gods and name him the Father of Griffons.

Davrin becomes a legend, remembered not for being a monster and killing, but for saving the world and for being a caretaker. His arc is complete.

Throwing Assan down that hole was just a cheap shot at the player's emotions. Davrin's arc deserved better.

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

I somehow always come back around to drawing a ship taking a bath together, it's a cute thing to do.

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

bro...what we could have had..

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

"he would not fucking say that" applies to almost all existing characters except for the seinfeld cast, who can plausibly say anything

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

Positive affirmations:

I deserve a halberd

I should be given a halberd

People want me to have a halberd

I can be trusted to own a halberd

I will be given a halberd one day

People will think my halberd is incredibly hot

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

over-psychoanalyzing blorbos is healthy and needed enrichment for the girlies in order to avoid over-psychoanalyzing themselves. like giving a dog a chew toy in order to redirect chewing on its hind legs

[5queerducksinatrenchcoat]

You guys know those memes that are like "dad and the dog he didn't want". That's what Rook de Riva and Viago are to me. What did Rook do that was so horrible. Well he had the audacity to almost die or something idk this was a quick doodle. Viago shows his concern for rook via verbal harassment love him for that‼️‼️