#I may have made this just because I saw someone else post a Will Wood Tierlist

[3bookworm]

[naughtyneganjdm]

Lost & Found - Chapter 2

Summary: Once Negan gets better, he tries to teach Mia to fend for herself so she can take care of herself when he leaves, but Negan finds himself more attached to this girl than he expected to be.

Characters: Negan, Mia, Y/N (reader/OC), etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53376820/chapters/135146467

Warnings: Swearing, Gore, a child gets hurt, Severe Angst, etc.

Notes: I was going to wait to post this, but since it's already done and the reason I didn't post it all at once because I thought it may have been too long is why I'm just posting it today. I know it won't get the hits because it's not smutty, but that's okay. I wrote this all in one night a few weeks ago. (Chapter 1)

“Would you knock it off,” Negan looked back over his shoulder to see that Mia was standing in the middle of the woods with her head tipped back and her hands thrown up in the air. With the rays of sun shining through the trees, she was enjoying the way it felt over her flesh. “You’re being weird again.”

“I’m sorry man, it’s just been a long time since I got to be outside this long,” she informed him, her long eyelashes fluttering when she turned her head to stare out at Negan with a big cheesy smile. “It feels nice to get the sun on my skin.”

“You have to listen to me,” Negan snapped his fingers to get her attention hearing her huff loudly. “You’re never going to survive if you can’t focus.”

“I’m focusing! I listened to you when you explained to me how to dress a wound. Which I obviously knew by the way since your ribs. I helped you move the bush and the branches over the gates to hide the fence. I listened to your long ass description of each and every gun,” she listed off the things they had already done together, “So please excuse me if I take a moment to enjoy the warmth on my skin after being locked away inside of a house for so long.”

“Mia, I’m leaving tomorrow,” Negan reminded her of what was happening. Over the last few days Mia had been taking care of him and nursing him back to health. Today was the first day he actually had the strength to get up and move around. “If you don’t pay attention now, you are never going to make it. You have to find your own food and be able to survive.”

“Okay! Okay! I’m listening boss,” she lowered down into the same position that Negan was in noticing that he was pointing to the footprints that were in the grass.

“You have to be able to track and be quiet,” Negan motioned her to follow him to track the deer that they had been for a while now. When they made it to the bush, he motioned her to be quiet and reached for the bow to give it to her. Pointing out in the distance to where the deer was, he saw her face turn pale at the idea of actually killing the animal. Motioning her to use the bow the way he taught her earlier had her expression changing and he could tell she didn’t want to do it. “I know you’ve never done this before, but it’s the only way to survive.”

With a frown, she did what Negan had shown her earlier in the day with the bow and arrow. When it hit the deer and it let out a pained sound, Negan reached out to pat her on the shoulder, “Good job. We’ll have a good meal tonight because of you.”

“I just feel like a horrible person doing this Negan,” Mia stated when Negan moved up on the deer with his knife and she had to look away when Negan finished the deer off. A gagging sound fell from her throat when Negan looked back at her with his hands bloody. “I hate killing something else…”

“It’s the only way you live,” Negan reminded her hearing the sound of something moving in the bushes and he pulled his handgun out, stepping before Mia to keep her behind him when he saw three men approaching them. “Back off.”

“Hey, we don’t mean any harm,” the man in the center explained, his features softening when he looked beyond Negan to see that Mia was with him. “We just didn’t know someone else was out here hunting. We didn’t mean to scare you and your daughter.”

“I’m not his daughter,” she spoke up, her face scrunching when the man that was speaking gazed over her. Negan hushed her and tried to push Mia back behind him to keep her safe. Hearing someone else refer to her as his daughter out loud made even him uncomfortable. “What?”

“She’s not your daughter? With the same eye color, the dark hair and the dimples?” the man inquired drawing Negan’s lips to part, getting distracted in that moment to look back at Mia. Clearing his throat, Negan noticed the way that the sun hit in her hazel eyes and he felt a breath catch in his throat. “I’m sorry young lady. I just thought this was your daddy.”

“My dad died,” she responded once more and immediately Negan cut her off.

“The deer is ours,” Negan informed them, his thick eyebrows bouncing up.

“Do you have a place around here somewhere?” the stranger questioned, but Negan remained quiet. “If you’re looking for a group to join, we have a campsite about a mile or so away. If it’s just the two of you, it might be easier if you join us.”

“We’re good. We’re not alone and our group is waiting for us,” Negan lied, keeping his gun up like he had taught Mia days earlier. “The three of you can move along now. We’re fucking good.”

The three strangers stayed where they were and Negan clicked something on the gun drawing the stranger in the middle to throw his hands up, “Listen fucker, if you don’t leave, I’m going to put a bullet right between your eyes and then your friends. So I suggest you get the fuck out of here.”

“Like I said, we didn’t want any trouble,” the stranger hit the chest of the other two he was with before nodding in another direction. “We will get on our way.”

“Better do that,” Negan waited for them to leave, never lowering his gun until he knew they were far out in the distance. Swiftly moving down, Negan grabbed the deer the best he could and threw it up over his shoulders. Motioning Mia to stay close to him, he walked around in circles for a while and out of the way to make sure that people weren’t following them. Just in case they might be tracking the two of them, he hoped by doing what they were, the strangers would get lost.

“What are we doing?” Mia questioned when she even picked up on Negan acting strange. “This isn’t…”

“Quiet,” Negan hushed her with a hiss before finally leading them back to the cabin. Once they got there, Negan did his best to hide everything and dragged the deer into the kitchen. Dropping the deer on the counter, he heard Mia let out a disgusted breath when the blood splattered. Starting to pace back and forth in the kitchen had Mia’s eyes locked on him, confused. “Fucking hell.”

“What is it?” Mia didn’t understand what was going on and he gave her a glare.

“You are going to fucking die Mia!” Negan claimed with tension flooding his veins.

“What?” she gave him a surprised expression when Negan threw his bloody hands up in the air. “Why?”

“You don’t give strangers personal information!” Negan snapped at her, his face twisting with anger when she looked up at him with her big hazel eyes. “People aren’t nice anymore Mia! They are more dangerous than the walkers and you are able to wind up dead in those kind of situations.”

“You were a stranger,” she reminded Negan and he immediately shook his head.

“I’m not like everyone else Mia! You have to be cautious of everyone. You have to be prepared to kill anyone because they are going to do the same to you. They don’t care if you’re a kid,” Negan continued to lecture her seeing the color growing in her cheeks the further he yelled at her. “People will kill you or they will do something…much, much worse.”

“What’s worse than killing me?” she whispered, her eyebrows furrowing and Negan let out a growl of frustration. “I just don’t understand Negan.”

“People aren’t good Mia. That’s why I had to walk around like I was so they couldn’t follow our tracks,” Negan educated her on what he had done, his head shaking when he stared her down. “Men like that are dangerous. You’re a pure, sweet, little girl that they can take advantage of and hurt. Do you understand me?”

“Negan, I just…” she tried to reason with him since she hadn’t really felt like she did much wrong.

“Do you understand me?” Negan screamed at her causing her to lower her head.

“I understand,” she nodded, a lump growing in her throat while she tried to avoid getting upset with him screaming at her like he was.

“If you don’t listen to the things that I’ve been telling you, you’re going to die and then there will be nothing for your mother to come back to. Do you understand?” Negan snarled when he noticed the redness growing in her cheeks as she continued to avoid looking at him. Curling his finger underneath her chin, he forced her to look up at him and let out a shuddering breath. “Do you understand me?”

“Yes sir,” she responded with a firm nod trying to hold back on her emotions that she was having. Even though she was trying to put up a façade, Negan could tell that she was getting emotional. “I’ll pay attention and listen to everything that you have to say.”

“I’m going to show you how to deal with this deer. It’s very similar to how you would deal with any other animal. You don’t let things go to waste. Not anymore,” Negan started, leading her toward the counter while he started doing the process of what to do after you killed the deer. Even though she was uncomfortable, he made her do a lot of it with his help and instructions because he knew she would be left alone. Whenever it looked like she was going to get sick, Negan would take over and give her a break. At the corner of his eye, Negan could see that Mia was observing him closely. “Why are you staring at me like that?”

“Do you think that guy was right?” Mia brought up the men that they had run into and Negan stopped for a moment to look over at Mia. “Do you think you look like you’re my father?”

Hearing her ask him that question caused his heart to skip a beat. A breath caught in his throat and he immediately lowered his head to go back to work trying to avoid the question. It had been something that he considered several times since being here, but he didn’t want to bring it up to her.

“We do have the same color eyes. The dimples,” she pointed to her cheek when Negan gave her a quick look trying to avoid getting blood on his face. “Even the freckles on our shoulders.”

“Your father died, Mia,” Negan reminded her, his nose wrinkling when he tried to stay firm about everything. “You know that.”

“Yeah, but maybe my mom was lying like you said,” Mia suggested and Negan almost heard a hopefulness in her voice. “We have so much in common and I do look like I could be yours. We both love peanut butter…”

“Everyone loves peanut butter,” Negan corrected her with a grunt, shaking his head when she was considering this whole thing herself. In one hand he had a knife when he shrugged his shoulders and he noticed that he was dripping blood all over the floor. “You know, unless they are allergic or some shit.”

“You don’t think I look like I could be your daughter?” she wondered having him step back to stare out at her. The truth? Yeah. She looked very much like she could be his. He thought it from the first moment he saw her.

“I’m not your dad,” Negan shook his head, refusing to allow that thought to linger between either of them when he went back to work. “Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? Some random woman gets pregnant with my baby fourteen years ago and just somehow, miraculously I find her in the middle of the woods in a cabin fourteen years later?”

“Weirder things have happened,” she went to try to help Negan when she noticed his hands were shaking and he lifted his hand to stop her. “So there is no way that you could be my father? You weren’t with anyone back then?”

“Mia, I can hardly remember what I did last week let alone fourteen years ago,” Negan reasoned with her, his Adam’s apple bouncing in this throat. “I’m not the only person in the world to have dark hair and hazel eyes.”

“Yeah, but the dimples and the freckles,” she reasoned with him, tugging at her shirt to reveal the freckles that were over her flesh. Stepping forward, she tugged at Negan’s shirt to look at the freckles that were on his shoulders and he pulled away from her with a huff. “Maybe it was the world’s way of…”

“You’re not my daughter!” Negan snapped at her, throwing his hands up in the air to have her stop talking. “I understand that you are probably feeling a certain way because your mother has been gone for so long. You’re looking for someone to cling onto, but I’m leaving tomorrow, Mia. Think about what the chances would have to be for that to happen. It’s impossible. And I have a family. A son that I have to get back to. He needs me.”

After Negan brought up Joshua to her, it made tears burn at her eyes and she nodded her head, “you’re right. I don’t know what I was thinking. My dad is dead.”

“Can we finish this please? I’d like to get some sleep tonight so I can start early,” Negan begged of her noticing her lifting her arm up to wipe at her eyes with an area of her arm that didn’t have blood on it. Without another word, she stepped forward to help Negan.

Most of the night she stayed quiet, even throughout dinner after they cooked. That was rare for Mia, but she talked. A lot. Just like him. Negan taught her how to preserve the meat and use other parts of the deer. When it was time to separate for the night, Negan went to the room he had been staying in. During the middle of the night, he heard movement in the hallway and he carefully got up to look through the small crack in the door. Mia was sitting on the stairs and she looked deep in contemplation, but also sad.

Considering talking to her, Negan realized it would only make things harder in the morning when he left so he just went back and crawled into bed. By morning, when he came out with the bag he had upstairs packed, he found her sitting on the couch and he wondered if she had been up all night.

Usually Mia never shut up. Yet she was speechless right now. Mia went to sit on the stairs again with nervous energy, but she still said nothing. With him packing the rest of the supplies that he would need that he was taking from what Mia had after their agreement, he could see that her face was red and she looked extremely upset.  

“Well kid,” Negan went to the bottom of the stairs with her hazel eyes lifting to meet his. “I guess this is it. Thanks for taking care of me.”

“Yeah,” she moved down the stairs and held out the thing that she had in her hand. Seeing that it was a full jar of peanut butter made Negan’s eyebrows bounce up. “Here, you should have this since I know peanut butter is your favorite.”

“I already have enough,” Negan pat his backpack knowing that she had already given him supplies for his journey. When she held the jar out further toward him, he accepted the jar of peanut butter and gave her a small nod. “Thanks kid.”

“I hope you find them,” she whispered, a tremor falling from her throat as she tried to keep things together. Holding her hand up, she curled it into a fist and held it out to Negan. With a smirk, Negan fist bumped Mia and gave her a wink. “Goodbye Negan.”

“Goodbye Mia,” Negan motioned her to follow him outside so she could let him out of the gate. Before he left, he made sure to help her chain everything back up. “Make sure you cover everything once I leave,” Negan gave one more order noticing that she was having a hard time looking at him when he left. “I hope your mother comes back Mia.”

There was a single tear that was sliding down her face when Negan frowned and lowered his head. Maybe he should have said something more or done something, but he couldn’t bring himself to. Pushing forward, he knew that he had to keep on and find his family. It was hard leaving a kid that he knew had nothing, but he had to. His family was out there waiting for him and he had been gone long enough.

For a while he walked and made some good distance. After some time, he started to hear footsteps following him and he would steal a look over his shoulder to try to see what it was. Keeping on, he heard the footsteps start to quickly come up on him. Turning on his heel, he brought his gun up only to come face to face with Mia who had been following him.

“Mia! What the hell are you doing?” Negan yelled at her, his heart pounding away inside of his chest. Mia had stumbled back when he had thrown the gun in her face out of surprise.  

“Do you think…do you think that maybe you could just stay until my mom comes back?” Mia requested causing Negan’s throat to tense up, a small rumble of a groan falling from his throat. “Please. I have so much to learn still and…I don’t want to be alone again Negan. I’ll give you all the medicine that I have if you do. Please.”

“I can’t,” Negan shook his head, clinging tightly to his bag drawing the color from her features to return. “I have a family of my own that I have to find and get back to. I can’t just wait with you until your mom finally comes back.”

“You’ve been away from them this long,” she reminded him causing his dimples to become more prominent with the anger that flooded his veins when she brought up how long they had been apart already. “Why not wait a couple more days? What difference would it make if you just stayed with me a few more days until my mother came back?”

“I owe you nothing Mia,” Negan reminded her, his eyebrows bouncing up and his head tipping to the side.

“I mean, I did save your life,” she pointed toward his ribs, her chest aching at the annoyed glance he gave her. “You’d be dead if it weren’t for me.”

“And I paid you back plenty with my knowledge,” Negan insisted, throwing his hand up in her direction. “So don’t pull that shit on me.”

“Just a few more days,” Mia placed her hands together, her jaw clenching when she stepped forward toward Negan who pulled the cowboy hat he was wearing from his head. “And when she comes back, then you can just…”

“Your mom isn’t coming back Mia!” Negan interrupted her having a frown flood into her young features. “I hate to be the one to tell you this Mia, but your mom is dead. You know that I’m right. If your mom was alive, she would have come home a long time ago. Something obviously happened while she was out on a supplies run. I can’t stay waiting forever with you because I have a son and a wife to find. You can’t trap me into staying with you while waiting for your mother to return when we both know it’s never going to happen.”

“Just a day?” she tried to get him to agree to something, but he frowned and shook his head. “Please? My whole life I’ve felt like I was just some kind of mistake. It’s my biggest fear. It always was. That I was something my parents didn’t plan and I shouldn’t have been here in the first place. I felt like a waste of space Negan. Until you came along. I felt like maybe I wasn’t a mistake anymore. I saved you. I took care of you. I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

“Go home Mia,” Negan ordered, clutching to his bag and letting out a long sigh. It was breaking his heart hearing all of this, but there was nothing he could honestly do. “You’ve got a target on your back if you stay out here.”

“Negan?” she whispered his name with a whimper and he shook his head before continuing in the direction that he was headed all along.

It hurt leaving that girl all alone, but he had to or else he knew that he would never leave. There was no way that Mia was ever going to understand that her mother wasn’t coming home. He couldn’t get stuck in a child’s dream that was never going to happen so he had to make his way onward. For a while he walked until he came up on a small camp where a fire was burning. Swiftly making his way into the bush, he wanted to get by without being detected until he heard the sound of a radio being used.

“We found the girl from yesterday,” Negan stopped when he heard that and looked over his shoulder to see one of the men that he had ran into with Mia the day before. Biting down on his bottom lip, Negan squeezed his fist closed and lowered his head.

“Just keep going Negan,” he tried to coach himself, cussing under his breath.

“Did you find out where they were hiding?” the man stood from where he was sitting beside the fire and Negan lowered down. “Did you find the guy that she was with?”

“It was just her. She won’t talk,” the voice on the radio responded leaving Negan to lower his head. “I can’t get her to talk, so we’re bringing her back to the camp.”

“Good idea,” the stranger replied with a grumble, pacing in the small area that they were taking up in the woods. “I can think of a few ways to get her to talk. And if she doesn’t, I really don’t care. I’ll make good use of her.”

“Fuck,” Negan lowered his head into his hand. There were four people already at the camp and he had no idea how many were coming back. Cussing to himself, Negan thought about what he was supposed to be doing. Where he belonged. If he stayed behind to help this girl, he would likely get hurt again or die before he found his family again. “Come on Negan.”

Trying to stay close to the ground, Negan managed to get out of the area of the camp, keeping his head down. He couldn’t let a few days ruin the few years of planning that he had done. It was the sound of a gunshot going off that made him panic. Rushing back toward the camp, Negan carefully came up on it noticing that one of them he had just seen was lying face first in the dirt dead.

“Stop moving you little shit,” the original stranger they interacted with was screaming at Mia from where she was underneath him on the ground. Two of the others were holding her wrists down while she struggled. “You just killed one of my men, you can’t just expect me to let you go without punishment.”

“Get off of me you fucker,” Mia spat at the man and Negan could see that her face was bloody from whatever the men before had done to her. “I’ve got nothing to give you.”

“Where is your dad?” the man questioned, grabbing a firm hold of Mia’s face to get her to look up at him. One of Mia’s eyes were swollen and Negan felt his chest tightening when Mia said nothing. Reaching behind him, the stranger grabbed a hunting knife and held it to Mia’s throat hearing her whimper. “Where is your dad?”

“He’s not my dad,” she repeated what she had told the man the day before. A scoff followed and the stranger dug the tip of the knife further into her flesh. “He’s not my father!”

“Come on little girl. You look exactly like that guy and you expect me to believe you aren’t his kid,” the man half laughed drawing Mia to swallow down hard. “It be one thing if you weren’t a spitting image of him, but you are. You’re expecting me to believe that you aren’t a product of that man’s nutsack?”

“I’m not. Even if he was my dad, he’d want nothing to do with me,” Mia explained wincing when the tip of the blade cut at the side of her face. “He left me! He was just a stranger. Please.”

“Fine. Whatever. I don’t care, he’s not your daddy,” the man mocked her hearing her straining to get out from beneath him. “Where is all of your stuff? Your community?”

Instead of answering the man above her, Mia spit causing the blood from her mouth to spray in his face. With a laugh, the stranger shook his head and wiped at his eyes, “You don’t want to talk? Fine. I’ll find other things to do with you then…”

Going to reach for Mia, the man screamed out when she sank her teeth into his hand causing him to yelp. Trying to pull his hand back, the man couldn’t get her off him and when he finally did, his fist came crashing into her face.

Immediately reaching for his gun, Negan started firing it off hitting one of the men that was holding Mia down on the ground between the eyes. There was no more holding back, Negan needed to protect her now. Shooting the gun at the other one holding onto her wrist had the man rolling backwards and Negan felt his body being tackled by someone from behind. The gun fell from his hand, sliding a few feet away while he struggled with the weight that was over him. Bringing his elbow back over and over again, Negan managed to get the person that was there off before he reached for his hunting knife to bring it back to stab the person that was behind him in the throat.

Shoving the weight off of him, Negan swiftly got to his feet only to feel someone tackling into his ribs drawing him to hit the ground hard. That knocked the wind out of him, especially since he was still tender there from being injured. Over and over again fists hit him and he did his best to block the punches, but the person still got a few good hits in. When the man over him got tired, Negan managed to get a few powerful hits in before bringing his knife up to dig it into the center of the attacker’s chest. Pulling it down gutted the stranger that was over him, causing blood to pour down over Negan. Grunting out, the weight of the body fell in over him and Negan hissed shoving the weight off of him. Struggling for the gun that he had dropped, Negan scoffed when someone shot at the gun causing him to fall back. Gazing back over his shoulder, Negan saw there were two of them left. One was the main stranger that they had seen yesterday and Negan presumed he was the one in charge. He was the one with the gun and the second stranger was approaching Negan.

“I knew daddy wouldn’t be far away,” the man in charge muttered when Negan considered his next move. Noticing that there was a rock beside him, Negan waited until the man approaching was close. Sweeping his legs out, Negan locked his legs with the stranger causing him to stumble, hitting his head on the oversized rock leaving a large blood smear across it. Snatching his gun up from the ground, Negan held it up at the stranger in charge while keeping his knife in his opposite hand. It was then that Negan noticed the stranger had an unconscious Mia in his arms with his knife pressed to her throat and his gun pointed at Negan. “Don’t!”

“So you get your rocks off hurting little girls?” Negan questioned wiping the blood away from his bottom lip. “Is that your thing?”

“Drop your gun or I swear to God I will cut her throat,” the man screamed at Negan watching Negan toss his gun to the side and hold his hand up in the air. “You give me your group’s location and I will let you have her.”

“See, here is the thing,” Negan took a step closer hearing the nervous breath that fell from the stranger. It had him clinging tighter to Mia and Negan clung tightly to the knife in his hand. “You hit that little girl. There is no fucking way I’m going to keep you alive.”

“I said stop,” the man warned, shooting the gun off and hitting Negan in the arm with the bullet. A grunt fell from Negan’s throat when he looked to it and then back to the man. “I said stop!”

Rushing the man, two more shots went off, but a gurgling sound fell from the stranger’s throat when Negan managed to bring his hunting knife into the stranger’s belly before pulling up. Dropping backwards, the stranger released Mia who fell to the ground as well. Standing over the stranger, Negan looked to his own shoulder with a wince. One of those two shots hit him in the shoulder, but the second missed him completely.  

“Your aim is shit,” Negan reached for the gun that the stranger had used, his head tipping to the side. “Are you part of a bigger group?”

“Fuck you,” the man snarled and Negan pointed the gun down at the stranger’s groin. “I’m not telling you shit.”

“Fine,” Negan shot the stranger in the groin hearing him crying out in agony. “Are you the last one?”

“I’m the last one. Please…” the stranger begged holding up his hand for mercy when Negan moved further in over him. “It’s just me. It was only us.”

“You should have left the little girl alone,” Negan took one final shot, hitting the stranger right between the eyes. Dropping the gun on the man’s chest, Negan looked to Mia and frowned. Picking her up in his arms, Negan made sure to grab his things before carrying her back toward the cabin. It took longer since he was injured, but once he made it back, he carried her into the cabin first and laid her down on the mattress that she had previously pulled into the living room for him. Going back outside, he locked things up and hid the gate as best as he could before heading back inside. Getting some water to clean Mia up, Negan frowned while he took care of her hating that he let this happen. He wished she would have just stayed in the cabin like he asked.

After he was done cleaning her up, he could only really see that she had a swollen eye with a bloody nose and lip. Which she should have never had in the first place. Once he was sure that she was okay, he shakily pulled his shirt off and assessed the damage of his gunshot wounds. The one in the shoulder was a whole lot worse than the one that hit his arm. The one in the arm was a flesh wound, but the one in his shoulder was one that he would have to dig the bullet out of.

Shakily searching the medical supplies that Mia had, Negan did what he had to in order to get the bullet out of his body finding himself thankful that this guy had a shit shot enough that it didn’t hit anything major. It was hard to clean up the wounds but he did what he had to in order to make sure that he was safe.

Waiting in the chair that Mia had before when he was hurt, Negan stayed there until morning. Toward the middle of the night he had started to drift and he tried to fight it, but he couldn’t. When it was morning and she started to shift, Negan noticed her trying to lift her head up and he motioned her to stay when he moved to the bed beside her.

“Hey, it’s me. It’s Negan,” he hushed her noticing the way that she seemed to calm down when she heard his voice. “You’re safe. I’m with you.”

Shakily her hand reached for his and he hooked his fingers with hers hearing her breathing uneasily, “I’m sorry I left. I’ll stay with you until your mother returns. Okay? I won’t leave you again. I promise.”

Mia said nothing, just gave a nod and lowered her head back to the bed weakly. Clearing his throat, Negan went to pull his hand away, but he felt her still clinging to it, “Please don’t leave.”

“I won’t,” Negan assured her lowering down beside the bed to allow her to keep holding onto his hand. “I’m right here.”

It didn’t take long for Mia to fall back asleep and he frowned looking her over. The thoughts about what the stranger said about her looking like him was running through his mind. They both had questioned in multiple times and he really did wonder if he was her father. Getting into the bed beside Mia, he laid at the other side watching her while she slept.

After a while he had fallen asleep as well and in the middle of the night woke up to see that Mia had cuddled up next to him much like he had described Joshua to her in the past. Clearing his throat, Negan lifted his head to see that her head was laying over his chest and he was thankful it was on the side that wasn’t hurt. Cautiously, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close to him so he could nestle his chin in over the top of her head. There was something about Mia that felt personal. And now he knew that he had to stay with her. There was no other way.

----

“Would you show your cards already?” Negan snickered from where he was sitting across the table from Mia who was staring out at her cards that were in her hand. It had been a month and a half since Negan had decided to stay with Mia and wait for her mother to return. Each day Negan could tell that her belief and hope that her mother would return was leaving her. But Negan did his best to keep her hope alive. “You take forever with this game. If I would have known you were incredibly slow, I would have never taught you poker.”

“Hold your horses old man. There is a lot at stake here,” she pointed toward the potato chips that they were playing with in order to do the game. Tossing the potato chips into the center to match his bet made Negan smirk and shake his head. Lowering down his cards, he showed her that he had a straight.

“Not so arrogant anymore, are you?” Negan stole one of the potato chips and she playfully swatted his hand away from the rest of them. Plopping one between his lips, Negan watched her lay down her cards to show that she had a full house. “Jesus. How do you always beat me?”

“Because I’m awesome,” she dropped her hands forward to scoop the potato chips in closer to her. A snort fell from Negan’s lips when she shook her head and pushed the potato chips forward. “But we can share.”

“Very bold of you kiddo,” Negan winked at Mia, taking another potato chip for himself before relaxing back in the chair that he was sitting in.

While relaxing, Mia collected the cards and started to shuffle the cards. It made him smile to see her working them the way that he had taught her. Grunting out, Negan pulled himself up from the chair and moved toward the fire that they had set up earlier in the fireplace. Grabbing his chair, he pulled it to him. Taking a seat, he got comfortable and looked to his wrist. Around it was a bracelet that Mia had made for him in their time together. Sadly, it made him think of Annie and Joshua. It had been six weeks since he agreed to be here with Mia and he never thought he would wait this long for Mia’s mom. It had been over two months since Mia’s mother had left and there wasn’t a doubt in his mind that she was never coming back.

“You know,” Negan began, looking back over his shoulder at Mia while she was playing a game of solitaire on her own. “You just keep beating me at all the games that I teach you.”

“That’s because you’re a good teacher,” she got up from where she was seated and grabbed her chair to move in beside Negan. Clearing her throat, she stared out at Negan who was looking at her funny. “What is it?”

“Can I ask you some things?” Negan inquired knowing that they had been on his mind for a while, but he was worried to ask them considering the topic at hand. When Mia gave him the go ahead, he stretched out his legs and frowned. “What else do you know about your father?”

“I told you everything I know about my father,” she reminded him, her jaw flexing when she reached up to stroke over her earlobe in a moment of contemplation. Grumbling to himself, Negan knew that was something he did when he was uncomfortable too and it made him sigh.

“You never saw a photo? She never gave you a name?” Negan threw his hand up in the air pretty sure at this point that Mia was his. That stranger wasn’t wrong. The more time that Negan spent with Mia, the more he realized it. From her physical features to some of the ridiculous quirks that she had—she was so much like him.

“I think it just hurt her so much to lose him,” Mia attempted to explain her mother’s behavior. “I don’t know Negan. She just has a ring that she wears. They were married and she never took it off. That’s all she has from him.”

“What does the ring look like?” Negan’s eyebrow arched up as he stroked his fingers down through his short beard. “Is there anything that stands out?”

“I don’t know, it looks like a ring,” Mia was dramatic, a laugh falling from her throat at how serious Negan was being about everything. “Why? What does it matter about the ring that she wore?”

“I don’t know,” Negan lied knowing that he was just trying to strike something in his memory that would make him think about a moment in his life where things made sense. “I just…I feel like if I heard something or knew something, it would make me remember.”

“Remember what?” she could tell something was wrong and she reached out to place her hand in over his. Negan’s fingers hooked with hers and he gave her a weak smile.

Negan’s lips parted when he considered telling her that he thought he was her father. Instead, he waved his hand in the air dismissively and shrugged his shoulders. There was a long silence that lingered over them for a while when they both sat by the fire before she finally cleared her throat. “I was thinking…it’s been over two months since my mother left. I uh, I know I shouldn’t think like this, but I was wondering…”

“Yeah?” Negan tipped his head to the side seeing the color draining from Mia’s features. “What’s on your mind kiddo?”

“If I was ready to finally let go, would you take me with you to go find your family?” she threw out the idea that had been on her mind for a while now after they had waited so long for her mother to return. “I know I’m just some stranger to them, but I really like being with you Negan. You’re the closest thing to a real parent that I’ve ever had.”

“Hey,” Negan frowned, hushing her when she said that out loud.

“I mean it. I loved my mom, but she never used to play games with me,” she pointed back toward the cards that they had been playing with. “I’ve learned more from you than I ever did my mother. I know about football because of you. So many new games. I’ve actually gotten to see the outside. And you make me actually feel seen. Before I felt like my mother’s pet.”

“You don’t mean that,” Negan’s Adam’s apple bounced in his throat and she shook her head with a saddened breath. “I’m sure your mother loved you.”

“My mother loved me the best way she knew how. You’re the first person I’ve actually felt safe with,” she insisted, turning in her chair so that she could face Negan. “You want to get back to your family Negan and I can’t keep holding you back. So why don’t we pack up and I’ll go with you? I’m helpful. I’m a decent cook. I can teach Joshua games. I can babysit when you and Annie want to have alone time.”

“Mia,” Negan snorted, rolling his eyes at the last comment.  

“Please?” she begged of him, her eyes gazing over Negan when she shook her head. “I’d rather just go with you than stay waiting for someone who really never loved me that much in the first place. I know you don’t feel the same way, but I lo…I care about you Negan. You’ve cared for me more in the last month than anyone has in my life.”

“I…” Negan could see the hopefulness in her eyes. It took a minute before he sighed and he gave her a slow nod. “Okay. Yeah. I’ll take you with me to Missouri. You’re just going to have to listen to me and be on my ass at all times.”

With an excited breath, she jumped across the small space to give Negan a hug. An amused sound escaped his throat when she put as much of her strength into it as she could. Hugging her back, Negan nuzzled his nose in against the side of her neck and smiled.

“Thank you, Negan,” she was grateful for him agreeing and she excitedly hopped up from her seat. “I’ll pack tonight! What should I take? How much should we bring?”

“Hey! Calm down. We have to think things out and then we can pack tomorrow. We’ll leave the day after,” Negan announced knowing that he had found comfort in this home, but he wanted to find Annie and Joshua. Staying here was nice, but this wasn’t where he belonged. He knew that. “Let’s just sit and talk about it. Then we will figure everything out.”

And that’s what they did. They planned everything. They packed and she asked a million questions about Annie along with Joshua. What they were like. The things they liked. And he found it charming that she was doing that. With how much she talked, Negan couldn’t help but find amusement in it. She was so much like him and he knew that. They had fallen asleep talking about things before waking up in the morning to go over everything.

“When are we leaving?” Mia seemed frustrated while she paced the living room with Negan taking in account of everything they were bringing with them. “We should just go.”

“Missouri isn’t that close Mia. We just have to make sure that we have everything. We have a very long journey ahead of us. Okay? Just let me make sure that we have everything that we are going to need,” Negan hushed her while he finished looking through all their stuff. The fact that she was so excited to leave surprised Negan. It was a huge difference from the little girl he had met originally. A laugh fell from his throat when he felt Mia wrapping her arms around him from behind. “What are you doing?”

“I’m giving you a hug,” she answered him, burying her head against the side of his neck drawing Negan’s laughter to grow. “I’m just glad you came into my life Negan. You showed up when I needed someone the most and I love you.”

Hearing that drew a breath to catch in Negan’s throat. Closing his eyes, he cherished the hug that she gave him.

Tension flooded Mia’s body when she heard a faint sound coming from outside. Looking back over his shoulder, he could see something change in her eyes when she looked back toward the door, “What is it?”

When they both heard it this time, Negan watched Mia scramble to her feet and run to the door looking out the front of it, “It’s my mom.”

“Mia, don’t,” Negan warned knowing that it had been so long that it likely didn’t make sense that her mother would be returning. It was too fast though because she was running outside and pulling away the brush that Negan had previously thrown in front of the gate. Once it was open, Negan saw a woman hunched over. She was thin, her hair messy, her clothes dirty and she was covered in blood. It made his throat go dry knowing that whoever this was, she had obviously been through hell. “Mia?”

“Mom?” she whispered and Negan heard the woman let out a tremoring breath before stumbling forward. With the way she could barely hold herself up, Negan swiftly swooped in and caught her when she collapsed. It was obvious she had passed out and Mia was scrambling to get a good look at her face. “It’s her. Negan, it’s my mom.”

“Run inside and get a cloth wet,” Negan instructed carrying the woman in his arms toward the cabin after making sure things were locked up again. Laying her down on the couch, Negan could see that Mia’s mom was likely starved and abused. Wherever she was, she had gone through hell. Footsteps were heard when Mia returned with a cloth. “Go find her some clothes Mia. Some clean clothes.”

“Okay,” Mia ran off to do what Negan requested of her.

Negan did his best to clean up the woman before him. Once the blood and the dirt was mostly gone from her face, Negan felt his heart sink finally seeing the features of Mia’s mom before him. An overwhelmed exhale escaped him when he looked to her hand. Observing the ring over her finger had the room spinning around Negan. Dropping back onto his bottom, Negan cleared his throat and lowered his head between his thighs.

“Hey?” Mia called out when she entered the room again with the things Negan asked of her. “Negan? What’s wrong? Is she okay?”

“I uh…I don’t know,” Negan stammered with an uneven breath brushing his hair back when he gazed over at Mia. “Let’s just get her cleaned up and we’ll have to wait.”

For days they actually waited. Mia was exhausted and finally fell asleep in her room leaving Negan alone with Mia’s mother. When he was finally about to pass out, he noticed her shifting on the couch. Sitting up straighter, he saw her eyelashes fluttering and she let out a pained sound. Moving in beside her, Negan was doing his best to monitor how she was so he could help her in whatever way possible. When she finally came to, she turned her head to gaze over at him and she let out a shocked breath.

“Negan?” she muttered his name, shakily lifting up to reach out and stroke her fingers over the side of his face. Leaning into her touch, Negan closed his eyes and felt his mouth dry when her whimper followed. “Am I dead?”

“No,” Negan answered her, his eyes opening and he could see that she was crying while she stared out at him. “Hey Y/N.”

“How is this happening?” she let out a tremoring breath, doing her best to pull herself up, but Negan hushed her and tried to stop her from overextending herself. “I thought you were dead. When I went to Alexandria, I was told you were gone. That you weren’t…”

“I’m not dead,” Negan shook his head, biting down on his bottom lip grabbing a hold of her hand while she brushed her fingers through his hair. “I never was.”

“How did you find us?” she questioned, noticing that Negan was crying while he stared down at her and she reached up to swipe the tears away. “I never thought…I never thought I would see you again. I tried to talk to Rick after Mia was born, but no one would listen to me. They took some of the people from The Sanctuary, but they wouldn’t take me. I was too loyal to you and they wouldn’t let me in. Even knowing I was pregnant. They just gave me some supplies and shooed me off. I tried going there. I did and I thought I would save you, I just…they told me you were dead.”

“You stayed at The Sanctuary?” Negan confirmed with a frown, his bottom lip trembling when she nodded.

“Until we couldn’t anymore. We were forced out after a while. It couldn’t sustain life there anymore and we had to leave,” she educated Negan, her fingers tracing over the side of his face while she slid in closer to him. “I’m so sorry. I would have kept trying if I would have known that they had you. I just didn’t and…”

“Y/N,” Negan breathed out feeling her lips claiming his and he was frozen against her kiss at first. Closing his eyes, he allowed her to kiss him before faintly starting to kiss her back. When her fingers brushed through his hair and stroked at the back of his neck, he pulled away and pressed his forehead to hers. “I can’t.”

“You can’t what?” she repeated with a weak smile. “Does Mia know that you are her father? Did you tell her? She’s going to be so excited to know that her daddy found us.”

“I’m married,” Negan stammered, his body trembling when she stared out at him with confusion. When she went to kiss him again, he put a distance between them and shook his head. “I can’t Y/N. I’m married.”

“I know,” she lifted her hand to show the ring that he had given her when they were at The Sanctuary together. Y/N was someone that Negan had flirted with for a long time. Someone that he had relentlessly asked to be one of his wives, but she always turned him down. So he romanced her and he romanced her hard. And somewhere down the line he truly felt like he had fallen in love with her. So that’s why when she finally agreed to be one of his wives, he had given her a real ring. At the time, he promised her that after everything went down with Rick that she would be his only wife. And he did know that she was pregnant. It was something he learned toward the start of his war with Rick. It was just when he asked about the people that were still at The Sanctuary, he was told that they all died and he believed it. When he returned to The Sanctuary after he escaped his cell that one day, when there was no sign of Y/N or a baby there, he just believed them. He thought they were dead and never went looking for them again. He couldn’t believe it was something he forgot until he saw her face again the other day. “I’m your wife.”

“Stop,” Negan begged when she went to touch his face again and he lowered her hands down to keep her away from touching him. “I’m married to a woman named Annie. We have a son. His name is Joshua and they are waiting for me in Missouri. I found Mia by mistake almost two months ago. I started thinking she was my daughter, I just didn’t know for sure. We were going to leave for Missouri the day you showed up to go find my wife and my son.”

“You’re not being funny Negan,” Y/N declared with a saddened breath and Negan shook his head slowly. “It’s not…”

“I’m not kidding Y/N. I’m very happily married,” Negan informed her noticing the way that she looked down at the ring that she still wore that he had given her so long ago. “I’m sorry. They told me when I was locked up that everyone was gone at The Sanctuary. I believed them. I thought you were dead. I thought our baby…”

“But Negan, I love you,” Y/N whispered, her voice broken when she shakily reached out to touch him. “I’m your wife.”

“You were one of my wives,” Negan corrected her, leaning back on his knees and shaking his head slowly feeling his heart breaking when she started to cry. “You are a past that I wanted to forget Y/N and I did. I moved on. A long time ago. I thought you were dead and I fell in love with someone else. Someone really great. She knows all of me and she still loves me.”

“So did I,” she reminded him with a sob and he felt guilty, dropping his head down when he saw her sliding back on the couch that he had her on. “Why wouldn’t you look for us? You know that I would never give up on you because I loved you so much. We worked so hard to get pregnant with Mia. We were…”

“I know,” Negan interrupted her with a shake of his head, letting out an uncomfortable sound. “I know. I just thought you were dead Y/N and I moved on. And I’m happy. I was happy. And I want to be with my family. I didn’t mean to, but I completely wiped that part of my life out of my head that I shared with you. I didn’t even remember it until I saw your face again the other day for the first time.”

Silence. That was all that was heard other than her cries while she stared out at him, “Mia and I were going to leave to go to Missouri and search for my family. She thought you were dead and you weren’t coming back. We can take a while to get you feeling better and if you want, I can bring the two of you with me. I can wait the extra time and we can all go together.”

“No,” she immediately responded with a shake of her head, reaching for the pillow that was beside her to bring it in closer to her. “I refuse to go on some journey with you so you can find the family that you actually wanted.”

“That’s not fair,” Negan cried, his head tipping to the side while she stared at out him with pain in her expression. “I didn’t know you were alive.”

“You didn’t even bother to look,” she yelled at him causing the color to drain from Negan’s features. “Now you’re asking me to follow you to another state to find the woman you are in love with. So I can what? Watch you and her together for the rest of my life?”

“You’d be safer with me. You and Mia would be much safer with me,” Negan suggested, his eyebrows full of emotion and he let out a tremoring breath. Hearing her sobbing broke his heart, but he couldn’t fix what had already been broken for so long. “Just come with me. We’ll find my family and all of us can be together. Mia is my daughter too and…”

“Oh, fuck you,” she snarled at Negan shaking her head in anger. “You’re in her life for how long and suddenly you think that you can say and determine what I do with Mia? No Negan. That’s not how this shit works.”

“She wants to be with me,” Negan explained, his fists tightening up at his sides with his body clenching up. “She doesn’t even know I’m her father and she wants to come with me. She loves me. She belongs with me.”

“You didn’t even fucking care to look for her,” Y/N snapped back drawing a shuddering exhale from his throat. “So how dare you act like you even care now. Do you have any idea what I’ve done to get back to Mia. What I’ve suffered through? What those people…” she stopped to look down toward the ground and she shook her head. “No, I won’t let you take Mia from me. Not after what happened to me. You won’t take my daughter. Why don’t you just leave Negan.”

“I can’t just leave knowing that you and Mia are here, vulnerable,” Negan reasoned with Y/N hearing her sobs getting harder. “You aren’t healthy. You both need to be protected. Just rest and in a few weeks we can all…”

“Get the fuck out of here Negan,” she screamed at him shoving her hands into the center of his chest drawing him to fall back onto the ground. “I have been heart broken since the moment they took you away. I haven’t been the same since and you just think you can do this?”

“It sounds like you were so fucked up that you were a shitty mother to our daughter,” Negan erupted back on her, shocking her with his response. “You taught her nothing. If I wasn’t here to take care of her in the two months you fucking disappeared, she would have been dead. I kept our daughter alive and she almost…she almost fucking died at one point, but I saved her. And then she tells me that you never even acted like you loved her to begin with. She’s felt more loved in the last month with me than she ever has with you. So why the fuck did you have to show up and ruin it? It would have been fine if you wouldn’t have showed back up!”

“So you get to just show back up in our lives, say fuck you to me and take Mia away from me?” she spoke softly while Negan’s heart pounded away inside of his chest. “So what was I Negan? Just someone you used to get pregnant? You promise me things that you will never give? Did you ever really love me Negan?”

“Of course I did,” Negan replied back with a frown, throwing his hands up in the air. “I did love you Y/N.”

“Like you said, I was just one of the wives though,” she reminded him what he had said earlier and he reached up to shakily brush his hair back. “I was just the only one dumb enough to love you, wasn’t I? To let you get me pregnant.”

“I understand you have to be going through a lot of emotions right now because of everything,” Negan began, the vein at the side of his neck protruding with the tension that he was feeling. “And no matter what I say to you, you’re never gonna believe me because you’re hurt. Regardless of what you think, I did love you and I was happy that you were pregnant.”

“But you found something better,” she filled in the blanks, her head nodding slowly. “I understand. I’m glad you found what you always wanted. I hope it makes you happy.”

“I am happy,” Negan assured her with a nod of his head knowing that what he was telling her absolutely destroyed her. “But I would be a lot happier if you and Mia came with me back to Missouri. You’d be safer. I’d get to be with my daughter. It’s a win for all of us.”

“No, you don’t get to have the best of both worlds,” she denied him, shaking her head and confusing him. “You pick them or her, you can’t have both.”

“That’s not fair,” Negan countered, anger flooding his veins with her giving him an ultimatum. “I don’t want to lose Mia now that she is back in my life. I’m her father. I belong in her life. You know that you both would be safer with me, but you’re mad at me so you’re holding this over my head. Look what happened to you being alone Y/N. Get your head out of your ass and do the right thing. The right thing for you and the right thing for your daughter. The two of you are just going to die here if I leave you. Look at you Y/N.”

“And it’s not fair that you abandon us and then you get to have everything you ever wanted. A family. A wife that you actually love. Two kids. While I have nothing,” she shook her head causing Negan to frown and drop his head back. Dragging his hands down his face had Y/N dropping back against the couch. “I wish you would have just stayed gone. Because at least with me thinking you were dead I thought you died protecting us instead of knowing that we meant nothing to you.”

“If I would have never showed up, your daughter would be dead,” Negan reminded her with a bit of venom in his tone. “Our daughter deserves to know that she’s mine. I’m leaving to go find my family and I’m going to give her a choice. She can stay here with you. Or she can come. She deserves to have a choice.”

“And she will pick you because you’re what’s new. You’re the fun parent that has shown her love that she never felt,” Y/N pointed out with a frown, squeezing the pillow in closer to her. “Thanks Negan. I take over two months of abuse and torture to make it back to my daughter only to have you take her from me. Thank you.”

“It’s not my fault that all of this happened,” Negan stood up from the floor, staring out at her with confusion flooding his veins. “She deserves to know that she’s my daughter. And she has the right to pick who she wants to be with.”

“Great. I’m glad that you are going to go find your family. Your son. Your wife. And you get to have Mia,” she tremored, a long shallow breath falling from her lips. “Congratulations Negan. You got everything you ever wanted in life. Good for you.”

“I suffered too you know. I was in prison for seven years with people abusing me and treating me terrible,” Negan hissed, his eyebrows furrowing in anger when she rolled her eyes and shook her head. “Fuck it. If you want to be like that. Be like that.”

“I should have known from the start you never loved me. They all told me,” she laid back down on the couch, turning away from Negan when he stopped to listen to her. “Sherry, Dwight, Simon…even Rick. I just never fucking believed it. I was too in love with you. Or the idea of you, I guess. How happy you got when you found out I was pregnant, I thought you were happy to finally have a family. But it was just the baby you wanted. Not me.”

“That’s not true,” Negan reasoned with her hearing her crying when he attempted to move forward to reach for her again. “Can you please just be an adult about this and understand? It makes more sense for you to leave with me and go to Missouri. We’ll all be together and…”

Negan knew it was no use talking to her like this. It just wasn’t. In the end they were never going to agree. Going over to the other end of the room, Negan sat down and cornered himself. Thinking about things, he rocked back and forth. It took him seeing Y/N’s face for him to actually remember that he had a woman that he was married to that was pregnant when he got taken to Alexandria. Maybe she was right. How could someone who loved someone like that forget?

Looking up toward the stairs, Negan knew that he wouldn’t be able to say goodbye to Mia, but he knew he had to leave. Grabbing his bag and one of the bag of supplies, he threw it over his shoulder and headed out the door. It was better for everyone if he just left and he knew that.

For a while he walked until he heard the sound of feet trying to catch up to him. Cussing out, he lowered his head and swallowed down hard, “Go home Mia!”

“No,” Mia’s voice responded while she moved in behind Negan. Looking back, he saw that she had the other supplies and her backpack on ready to go on the journey with him. “We made plans, we’re going to Missouri together.”

“Go home!” Negan screamed at her and she immediately shook her head. “Your mother is home now. We made a deal.”

“You promised. You told me that you would never leave me,” she reminded him with a whimper hearing Negan scoff.

“Until your mother returned home,” he reminded her with what he had said. “Your mother is home. Therefore, I owe you nothing. My promise? I made it. So I’m leaving.”

“Please,” Mia begged from where she was standing behind him with the bag over her shoulder. Her eyes were optimistic and she shook her head. “I want to go with you.”

“You are meant to be with your mother,” Negan could see that there were tears swelling up in her eyes while she stared out at Negan. Here she was begging to go with him not even knowing that he was her biological father. And that fact? It tore him apart. “You can’t come with me.”

Turning on his heel, Negan went to leave when he heard her feet following him and he stopped again, “Stop following me!”

“Negan,” she reasoned with him, her bottom lip quivering while she stared up at him. “I…we…I think…”

“You can’t be this stupid, right?” Negan dropped his bag at his side knowing that there was only one way he could think of to get her back to her mother and that was to break her. “I don’t love you, Mia. I don’t. You were a means of keeping me alive. I have no feelings toward you. You told me you cared about me and that you loved me. Did I ever tell you it back? I don’t love you.”

“That’s not true. You wouldn’t have stayed that whole month and a half if you didn’t care about me,” she reasoned with him, her dimples sinking in and it killed Negan seeing that he was breaking her down after his talk with Y/N. “I know you’re just lying to get me to stay here, but with you…I feel safer than I ever have in my life. I love you Negan. Please. I don’t care about anything else. I want to be with you.”

“I don’t want you with me!” Negan screamed at her, his body shaking and his eyes tearing over when she took a step back. Fear flooded into her features as Negan shook his head and bit down on his bottom lip. “You know, your father didn’t die Mia. In fact, your father knew that your mother was pregnant with you and he didn’t care. He didn’t even think about the two of you while he was gone. He just assumed the two of you were dead and he didn’t bother to come looking for you because he didn’t care. You and your mother? The both of you meant nothing to him.”

“That’s not true,” her voice tremored, her head shaking. “My mother said my father very much wanted me. That he loved me. That he loved her. That he would have done anything to keep me safe and…”

“Then why did he go off and have another family? He got married again and had a little boy,” Negan explained, his eyes narrowing when his jaw tightened. Contemplation started to flood her features when Negan started going off about things. “A little boy he loved more than he loved you.”

“Why are you saying these things?” Negan was hurting her and he could see that his words were breaking her heart. “You told me that I could come with you before. You said…”

“I thought your mom was dead,” Negan reminded her, his bottom lip quivering when he shook his head. “You see Mia. I know your dad isn’t dead because I’m your dad. We both know it. Even those strangers that we ran into knew that you were my daughter. All you have to do is look at us and you know that you’re my daughter. You have my eyes, my dimples, my freckles, my smart-ass sense of humor…”

Negan’s finger circled his own face and then he pointed out at her, “I’m your dad Mia.”

That backfired. After he confirmed for her what they both had wondered before her mother even came back, she ran to him and wrapped her arms around him to hug him. Holding his hands up in the air, Negan swallowed down hard and closed his eyes.

“Get off of me,” Negan demanded, shaking his head while venom flooded into his tone. “I didn’t want you then and I don’t want you now.”

Stumbling back, Mia looked up at him with her hazel eyes full of tears and Negan shook his head, “I knew your mother was pregnant with you. Once I was taken to Alexandria, I never looked back. I didn’t give a shit about the people there. I didn’t give a shit about your mother. And most of all…I didn’t give a fuck about you.”

A hurt sound fell deep from within her and her sobs followed. Even though he was trying to hold it together, he was breaking himself and he hated himself for doing this but he knew that he had to find a way for her to stay with her mother, “I could have come looking for you. And I didn’t. Because I didn’t care Mia. I started a whole new family. I have a son that I love. A wife…”

“Maybe…maybe you could learn to love me,” Mia whimpered, tears sliding down the sides of her face. “I don’t think we can make it without you Negan. I almost didn’t. Daddy please…”

“Don’t call me that,” Negan warned her, holding his finger up in the air and pointing it at her. “Don’t you dare call me that. You have no right to call me your fucking father. I didn’t want it then and I don’t want it now.”

“But you are,” she frowned, reaching up to rub at her tear-stained face while he continued to down talk her and chastise her. “I know you love me. And knowing that you are my dad, that just proves that this was meant to happen. You were meant to find me…”

“I have a son that I actually love and I’m going to find my way back to him,” Negan informed her with a shake of his head and he reached for his bag. This isn’t how he wanted things to go down, but Y/N made things clear earlier. There was no way that she would come with them and if he took Mia, it would destroy her. “I have a family that means something to me. And I’m going to find them. So why don’t you stay with your mother? Someone who actually loves you.”

“Please, I can help you find them,” Mia begged of Negan, her body shaking while Negan tried his best to stop himself from crying, but he couldn’t. “I’d be a really good big sister. I’d…”

“I’ve spent the last month and a half with you Mia,” Negan reminded her of the time they spent together and he shook his head. “And in that time, it only confirmed for me what I knew back then. I feel nothing for you. There is nothing here. You were a mistake. A poorly timed mistake that I never wanted in the first place.”

Calling her a mistake when that was the thing she was the most afraid of hearing hit her deep down and he knew that it would, “Goodbye Mia.”

Her sobs filled the woods and Negan continued walking through them. After a minute, he felt her running out and grabbing a hold of him in attempts to keep him near. Yanking his arm away, Negan spun on his heel and stared down at her, “I don’t want you, Mia. What about that don’t you understand?”

“Then I will sit here. And I’ll wait for one of the flesh eaters to get me,” she whimpered dropping down in the middle of the woods that they were in. “If you don’t want me, I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t like it with my mother. I love you and I want to be with you. Please.”

“I don’t care Mia,” Negan scoffed, grabbing his bag hearing her cries getting louder when he threw his hands up in the air. “If that’s how you want to leave your mother, then that’s your decision. From here on out? You aren’t my problem.”

“Please Negan,” Mia’s voice was broken when he turned away from her to look in the other direction. He had to convince himself to keep going. He couldn’t let this break him. He made his choice and so did Y/N. “Daddy. Please. If you leave, you’re leaving me to die. I’m begging you…”

Walking away, Negan could hear her cries no matter how far away he got. And he had to force himself to keep going. After what her mother told him, there was no way that it would have ever worked. And he had to tell himself that. He had to find Annie and Joshua. There were no other options. Y/N was his past and while he understood why she was hurt, she was the one that denied them going with him. So he had to respect her wishes. The best that he could hope for at this point was that they were able to keep going. That they would find a community and be able to move on.

More than anything he wanted to bring Mia with him, but her mother made it clear that wasn’t a possibility, so he had to wipe that idea from his mind and keep going. No matter how much it broke his heart.

[kiriekonamistan]

I was debating with myself over wether I should post this or not, but y'know what I like thinking about Fairy Tail and I'm gonna post it. Just incase it makes someone else as happy as it makes me.

NOTE: the words I bolded below the cut are words/terms I believe the Heartfilia women associate with their personal idea of Zeref.

So: What do the different generations of Heartfilia women associate with Zeref?

-Anna met him in the woods one day without knowing his identity for quite some time. He was a mysterious hermit mage with unbelievably high levels of magic power, and to Anna he had a lot of potential. Eventually he shared his ideas with her, a gate to connect the past and present, she instantly envisioned its usefulness and how it could save future generations.

To Anna he was a muse, a scholar and the guiding light who brought miracles into reality. But he was also a murderer, even if not by his own will or intentions, he had begun experimenting with the creation and manipulation of souls long before she met him. Her friend and teacher was the Black Wizard Zeref, she knew of him centuries before the terms 'Black Wizard' or 'Dark Mage' were conceived.

(Personally, I think Anna would also associate him with the Morning Star. The last star seen as dawn bleeds into a new day. He's a relic of the past even as far as Anna would be concerned because he's the last surviving student, and teacher, of the Mildian academy of Magic. Plus, the morning star is very closely associated with Lucifer. Depending on which interpretation of demonology you believe Lucifer either is a prince of hell who serves under Satan, or is Satan himself and Lucifer is just another name for him. I dunno, I can see connections between the two.) Also, Zeref's name is derived from the word Seraph as in the Seraphim Angels.

-Layla grew up hearing about the despicable actions of cults who claim to be following Zeref's last will. She knew that many scary stories about the dark mage himself were made up by parents to frighten naughty children into behaving themselves. But Layla wasn't a foolish woman, she knew he existed once and may still exist somewhere in the world she grew up in. Her ancestors' journal regarding the Eclipse Gate likely spoke of a brilliant wizard, one who Layla probably wondered about.

Could a man like Zeref, with all of his infamy and supposedly impossible accomplishments even be human? Chances are Layla thought he might be a God or Demon, maybe even a Demon God. Zeref was credited with creating a unique species of demons after all, and humans can't just make life so carelessly or easily as myths and legends said Zeref had. Maybe he was a Celestial Spirit, one who did something awful and was banished for his misdeeds? One who's constellation was no longer visible? Whoever and, or whatever Zeref had been and still might be, Layla would always feel like his name is a Dark Omen especially after having her daughter Lucy.

-Lucy knew of the scary stories that used Zeref's name. She knew about the legend of Lullaby, a death flute he had poured dark magic into thus creating a weapon of mass murder. He was the author of Demon Books and his name alone carries an Omen of Death.

Lucy saw Lullaby in person and nearly witnessed first hand its terrifying cursed power. Then on Galluna Island there was Deliora, another demon crated by Zeref who ruined the lives of so many people, including her own guildmate Gray. During her first year with the Fairy Tail guild alone Lucy encountered multiple demons made by Zeref's hand and nearly half a dozen groups of people (mostly dark guilds and cults) who were connected to his image in some way.

To Lucy Heartfilia, even before the incidents on Tenrou Island, Zeref was a real person. A monster in human skin, perhaps, but he had been real once.

And then Tenrou Island happens. Zeref is real in more than just a lingering image or some remnants hanging on from the Dark Ages of Magic. He's an immortal, who the members of Grimoire Heart believe to have mastered One Magic, the origin and completed form of all magical power.

----------------

Now I want to go into some speculation of what Lucy's image of Zeref; as a person and legendary mage, could've been if they had ever gotten some one-on-one interactions!! (Seriously, Lucy and Zeref could've had some very interesting interaction at any point in the series. There is just too much to unpack here, though.)

If Zeref and Lucy had met face-to-face (no, I don't count his unconscious body being manhandled across Tenrou Island. He was unconscious, she couldn't have gotten a read on his personality while he was unconscious...) at any point after Tenrou Island I feel like her impression of him would be similar to mine.

He's like a porcelain doll, empty and cold with unnaturally smooth edges. He fakes his smiles so often that they look natural now, but he's very good at pretending and I feel like Lucy would recognize this due to the environment she grew up in. He's unstable and unpredictable. Zeref is like a black hole he takes in so many things from knowledge, magic power, people, and even the essence of life which is stolen by his curse. In Lucy's mind he is a void that cannot give anything but death and sorrow. His curse makes him a cosmic force compressed down into a human body barely restrained by his own ability to compartmentalize his emotions.

Natsu, on the other hand, is like the North Star to Lucy. Her own guiding light always leading her back home to Fairy Tail. Natsu is Lucy's Polaris. (I need someone to write a fic with some of this imagery, please I am begging on my hands and knees. The huge difference in how Lucy views Zeref as a terrifying cosmic force in human skin with a sort of uncanny-valley appearance v.s. how she sees Natsu as everything that embodied her idea of 'home'! The way these two are brothers who are both so alike in certain ways but vastly different in others-!!)

I think about the Dragneel boys a lot. They are my favorite shade of angst and literary symbolism, I think. (Oh also, @spot-of-tea I'd like this to be seen by them.)

[daily-hyosatsu]

Let's continue the tea theme today! This is not, as far as I can tell, a human name (though I did find a tweet saying "Hey, I saw this 茶柱nameplate, but is this a name that actually exists?"). This appears to be a business sign—for a tea leaf reader, I think—that's designed to look like a nameplate, but there is a cool story behind this word!

茶, meaning tea, is read チャ or サ. The radicals are 艹 grass crown, 个 (for counting stuff), and either 木 tree or ホ ho, depending on who you ask.

柱 means pillar, post, cylinder, or support. It's read はしら or チュウ. The radicals make sense with the meaning: 主 main/lord + 木 tree/wood sorta means load-bearing, no?

Put them together and you get 茶柱 [ちゃばしら]. It doesn't mean a long block of tea, or that tea is the pillar of society; it refers a tea stalk floating upright, like this! (x)

(No matter how I look at it, all I see is a candle wick, but that's neither here nor there.)

An upright-floating tea stalk is considered auspicious. There are all kinds of local variations to this belief, but generally, getting one in your cup doesn't confer good luck automatically; there are conditions. For example, you might need to swallow the stalk without anyone noticing, or maybe you have to remove it and hide it in the left sleeve of your kimono, or you have to keep it a secret because telling someone else about it will transfer your good fortune to them.

It seems that this superstition didn't come about organically; it was apparently invented by teamongers. Traditionally, only lower-quality teas had any stems at all, so people had a negative view of stemmy teas. This story was designed to make stems a feature and not a bug. The belief stuck, and today, there are actually some tea makers that purposefully incorporate hollow stems because they're floatier.

Finally, now that the facts are done, here's a crackpot theory of mine. All of the tea pillar superstition corollaries have something in common: they encourage you not to call attention to it. If guests have to conceal any tea pillar that they might find, it allows their host to save face because no one is pointing out that they're serving a cheaper, lower-quality tea. It also protects those of us who are bad with social cues or not knowledgeable about tea but don't want to cause embarrassment. Even if you're just feeling petty or actively want to embarrass your host for some reason, it gives you an incentive not to. I think that's kind of nice. I may have made it up myself, but I do think it's nice.

[bekkachaos]

Fuck it Friday 🔥

starting this because it's Friday here and I wanna know if y'all would read this because I'm a SICKO and started writing some post-apocalyptic Buddie (because I can't stop thinking about the book All That's Left In The World)

tagging these wonderful people if they wanna share x

@monsterrae1 @the-likesofus @eddiebabygirldiaz @bi-buckrights @shortsighted-owl @elvensorceress @loveyourownsmiilee @doublecheekedkinard @loserdiaz @spotsandsocks @wildlife4life @jackluvsdaniel @belovedbuddie @bidisasterevankinard @wh0rebehavi0r @thewolvesof1998 @bucksbisexualawakening @weewootruck @daffi-990 @spagheddiediaz @honestlydarkprincess @loveyouanyway

He pushed through the pain and got himself back up. It was starting to get dark and he needed to find a sheltered place to rest for the night, if he could call it that. He had barely slept in the three days since he injured himself, even before that it's not what he would have called it. Fitful bouts of sleep and nightmares and evenings in the dark listening to the wilderness come alive and looking up at the stars imagining he was anywhere else.

As he hobbled through the woods he caught a glimpse of something between the trees and felt his heart begin to pound, he was either in so much pain and hallucinating, or by some miracle he had managed to find a cabin for shelter.

He struggled towards it, he couldn't focus on anything other than making it to the door, his hand gripping tight to the wooden porch railing, the other to his makeshift crutch, and then he heard the sound of a gun cocking behind him.

"Not another step."

Eddie was frozen in place. How long had it been since he heard another person speak? Weeks? Months? He wasn't even sure anymore.

"Turn around."

Slowly he shuffled his crutch around, wincing in pain again and still using the rail to support his weight as he let himself look back and past the barrel of the shotgun now pointed steadfastly at his chest.

It may have been odd, given his predicament, but for some reason his first thought was 'so I'm not the last one left'. He knew he wasn't of course, but it was easy to forget that fact.

The man who held the gun stood only slightly taller than he did, shoulders hunched up so his arms looked bigger as he adjusted his hold around the barrel with his finger on the trigger. His jaw was set, nostrils flaring as his unnaturally bright blue eyes stared out at Eddie's unwaveringly. He was intimidating, sure, at least he would have been if Eddie wasn't close enough to see the fear in his eyes. The gun was certainly helping though.

"Not here to rob you," Eddie said, and had he been in better shape he might have put his hands up.

"What do you want?" the stranger asked, inching the gun closer.

"I'm hurt, it's getting dark, just looking for a place to rest," he said.

"Well you can keep walking," he said roughly, and it made Eddie grind his teeth together.

"That's not working so well for me," he growled, and for a fleeting moment the man's eyes flitted down to his leg, the latter half of his jeans torn and drenched in a mix of fresh and dried blood.

"I know," he said, eyes back up to Eddie's. "I watched you walk up here."

"And you're still going to send me away?" Eddie scoffed.

It didn't surprise him, people didn't trust each other anymore. If you saw someone, you stayed away from them unless you absolutely had to. A desperate and hungry person would do just about anything to survive. Lie, steal, kill. Eddie had had plenty of uncomfortable encounters since he left the base, and each one gave him even more reasons to steer clear of people. If you were out on your own, you had to do what you needed to if you wanted to survive. The minute you let your guard down around someone, they'd betray you. He didn't say anything, just kept his hard stare on Eddie as if waiting for him to give in, but Eddie was in too much pain, too tired, too hungry, and too sick and tired of the woods to go back out there. "Listen man, all I need is some shelter, I'll sit under that porch while you barricade that door if that's what it comes too," he said. "But I'm not leaving." "Do you not see that I'm holding a gun to your chest?" he said, raising an eyebrow and making Eddie look him over for a moment. "You're not going to shoot me," he said, and maybe it was not the right time to be calling someone's bluff, but there was something in the stranger's eyes that made Eddie take the risk on it. "And why not?" he asked, an irk of irritation spreading across his face. "Because you don't want to shoot me," Eddie said. "You think I won't?" Eddie nodded towards the side of the gun. "Not with the safety on."

[patxhwrk]

Guys look i said id write stardew valley for sebastian but i have too much shane thoughts

he may be mentally ill but i am too

Also didnt have an jncorrect quote last night so have this instead

-ˋˏ✄— Uncoincidental

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Shane x Reader

Pronouns: they/them

"Look in the mirror say, "What's up you useless fuck?""

.navigation. // .stardew valley masterlist.

CW!!

—past alcohol addiction

Shane felt so useless, staring at his reflection in his dark bedroom. The television screen was dark and so was his reflection. His eyebags were heavier, but at lease his stubble was shaved, right?

This was pathetic, he thought.

Pathetic, pathetic, pathetic—

He shook off his thoughts and instinctively reached for something on his desk. His hand made contact with the cold wood and he sighed. Bringing back his hand to his face, he dragged it down as if it would wake him.

Right, he thought and scoffed. No more drinking, dumbass.

He sat on his mattress with his thoughts. Laying down on the soft plush did not help them ease. He raised both hands to his head and covered his eyes as he groaned.

Sunday mornings were so lame. It had barely been ten am but his room was still so dark. At least this was better than Joja, maybe.

Shane was left alone with his thoughts racing and running and loud and loud and if he could only drink one beer—

A knock echoed from outside his room. A knock?

He groggily and hesitantly stood up, fighting the urge to stop by the kitchen for the single beer can that was left in the fridge. Maybe he should just grab it, not let it go to waste. It was just one, and it was so close. It wouldn't be too bad if—

He opened the front door of the ranch empty handed.

"Hullo," the farmer up the hill greeted him with a bright smile. And Shane smiled back. Because he would smile for the farmer any day that he found them standing in front of him. He'll smile for them whenever they showed up to lighten his mood.

"Y/n." He smiled and his shoulders slacked. His thoughts were moved on, the beer in the fridge a past afterthought. And then he realized. "What are you doing here so early?"

They stared at him confused. "Shane. It's five in the afternoon."

Shane glanced at the outside behind them where the sun slowly set and the sky started dimming. Maybe his room was dark because it was five. "Oh."

They shook their head and heartily laughed. "Anyways, I saw the sign you posted yesterday about needing a shad for something, so I decided to get you one since I was fishing anyways. I—uh—got distracted and forgot to give it to you yesterday and—"

Shane cut them off. "Hold on, did you go fishing out in the rain without a cover? Again?"

Mouth stretching across their face in a line, they looked away. "...Maybe."

Shane couldn't stop the soft smile growing in his face, but he sighed to cover it. He knew Y/n wouldn't be able to miss it, though. "Dumbass. Get in here."

They entered the warm ranch and sighed in relief, taking a seat in the kitchen and placing the basket—one which Shane only noticed now—on the table. There was a piece of cloth covering something inside, the fish atop it. "Thanks, it's so fucking cold outside."

"It's fall, Y/n."

"I know that!"

"And you're not wearing a coat."

"...I know that."

He sighed and shook his head. How could someone be so stupid and so—

He paused his thoughts to look for the right word, glancing towards the farmer smiling down at their basket of goods.

—cute.

He blushed red and moved towards the kitchen counter to hide it from them. "Want anything? Tea, coffee?"

"Oh, no need really! I just wanted to stop by and give these to you."

They passed him the basket and he gently moved the fish somewhere else. Lifting the cloth to peek underneath, his eyes widened at the sight. The basket was filled with hot peppers, plenty good quality he assumed.

"A lot grew last summer, so I decided to save some for you," they stated with a scratch to their warming cheek. "And I thought, since it's fall, why not restock your supply?"

Shane could marry them then and there, if he was more confident in himself.

"You are a fucking deity." He grinned bright and joyous and genuine. He then shook his head. "And no, you're not going out without at least warming up. Tea or coffee? Or maybe hot cocoa?"

Y/n sighed, smiling softly at Shane's back before choosing their drink. "Thank you, Shane."

He paused. The look over his shoulder towards them and a soft smile was enough to tell Y/n that he wasn't just talking about the shad on the counter, or the peppers in the basket, or for stopping by just as his thoughts were so near to bringing him a can of beer to his hand. "I should be thanking you, y'know?"

Y/n smiled. "I know."

—PATCHWRK !

[foxes-that-run]

Two NYE ago means 2015 NYE right? Since Harry was with that girl, and she was pretty mad at that time, maybe she was reminiscing about their time together and hoping to find someone who'd stay and then after meeting Joe she repurposed it because she thought she found that love she was searching for with Joe. I think most of reputation is her repurposing songs/ideas that were about something/someone else. And Joe just fit but some songs definitely has part Joe in them too. So I guess she succeeded in that bait and switch thing

That video, (which Taylor Nation has cut at 24:38 from their version) is from Chicago 27 June 2018, so she is referring to NYE 2016/17. (side note: Harry was also in Chicago 30 June 2018. In his next show he changed the Lyrics to MMIH to 'running with thieves you'... a few weeks before Hamille ended due to cheating......)

We have been told a few things to tell us she was with Joe then:

In 2018 the Reputation magazines included photos from Stella McCartney's farm in Bishampton (on the pages adjacent to NYD) and in January 2016 Joe posted a photo of himself woods that also had trees... not the same trees, but OK... I guess.

In 2019 in promo for A Christmas Carol Joe told interviewers he swims in Hampstead Heath every christmas, which many linked to Paper Rings, along with a very natural photo of Taylor painting a literal wall. And maybe he does, just him, his family and (long time lcy swim enthusiast) Harry Styles and by chance no one ever photographed or spoke about it.

Then on 30 December 2020 Taylor was hacked and the only photos they got/leaked was 7 (rather odd) images of Taylor and Joe getting ready on that new years eve. Amazingly they had access to Taylor Swift's camera roll and only leaked 7 PG images that placed her with Joe the at the time of a story Taylor Nation edited out of one of their videos about an icy swim on NYE, almost on the anniversary of when they were taken. (The 7 Photos were in 2 drops, the proper (non-mirror) selfies leaked October 2021.)

So why do I doubt this? Any alternative version is pure speculation we don't know where Taylor was NYE 16/17. But the edited video is weird, and I find the above odd.

FIrstly New Year's Day seems like an 1989 outtake to me, the story also fits the NYE 2012/13 Haylor Kiss that did involve hardwood floors, a Taxi in which to squeeze hands, a lobby girls could carry shoes in and an insane crowd that did make it hard and probably made them feel lost. And she looked ready to cry performing it while she was dating Joe?

Where was Harry on New Years Eve 2016/17?

Well he was spotted with Taylor on 28 December 2016 in Liverpool. Within a few days, one of his friends signed a record for Taylor to gift Austin Swift. Austin thanked the band who replied "when someone asks you to sign a record for their "friends little brother' and the friend turns out to be Taylor Swift."

After being missing for a few days he was next seen taking photos with fans in Holmes Chapel (1.5 hours drive from Stella's farm) on New Years Eve.

But wait! Taylor said she and Joe had been together for 3 months in the Lover Journal? What she said was "we" maybe that was Joe and we didn't find out for another 5 months. Or maybe she was with someone else.... in this entry shaped like a butterfly.

Updated with more.. so I question adding this and need to cavet that haylorsecrets was an account that claimed to have inside info from Taylors PR office and lost the inside connection (in hindsight after Taylor fired her publicist before Tree in 2014) they then had a friend who fed them some info. It may have all been made up, but they were right about some things. Looking for another post I saw these where she posted in February 2017 that Harry and Taylor had been together at christmas. (x, x)

[lawsend]

Murder at Vista Heights Chapter 6

Series: Law’s End

Episode 1: Murder at Vista Heights

Fandom: The Royal Romance (loosely, there’s not much canon in here).

Pairings: None yet

Word Count: 2,500

Rating: MA

A/N: This counts as @karahalloway ask from my 1500 followers celebration post on my main account @angelasscribbles.

Warnings for series: adult themes, any given chapter may contain murder, violence, language, drinking, drug use, etc.

My other stuff can be found on my main blog @angelasscribbles here is the Master List.

The homicide division of the seventh precinct had been plunged into chaos. All three interrogation rooms were in use, leaving a person of interest cooling his heels in the waiting area.

Riley was trying to get comments from anyone that would talk to her. Max had narrowly evaded being tossed out of the station when he had attempted to get photos of William Sloan as he was brought in for questioning.

The mayor was livid at being called late in the evening by one of her biggest campaign contributors. “I don’t care what fucking time it is or how many hours you already worked today!” Madeleine was yelling at a lithe redhead with her hair pinned immaculately in place despite her protestations over the lateness of the hour.

Olivia Nevrakis narrowed her eyes at her boss. “And I don’t care how much money Sloan Enterprises has donated to your re-election campaign. If he’s a suspect, he has to be questioned, just like everyone else!”

“William Sloan most certainly did not murder Trent Hayes! Are you out of your mind?”

Olivia doubled down. “If there wasn’t some reason to suspect him, Liam wouldn’t have brought him in for questioning!”

While the mayor and the DA were having their showdown, Drake Walker was pacing the floor, waiting for his turn in interrogation.

He was a person of interest. Presumably, because someone had ratted him out to the police about his business relationship with William Sloan. His eyes scoured the open office area until he spotted her.

Riley saw him coming and made a strategic exit to the woman’s room. She almost ran over the sketch artist from earlier. “Oof! Sorry!”

“It’s okay,” Lillith assured her. “Who are you hiding from?”

“What makes you think I’m hiding from anyone?”

“I recognize the panic.”

“Wait. Who are you hiding from?”

“My sister.”

Riley’s brain spun to catch up. Then realization washed over her. She should have made the connection before. Nevrakis was not a common name. “The DA is your sister?”

Lilith flinched a little. “Half-sister. She hates me.”

“Why?”

Lilith shrugged. “Something about my whore of a mother breaking her mother’s heart.”

“Oh….” Riley was rarely struck speechless, but she had no idea how to respond to that.

“Sorry!” Lilith dropped her face into her hands. “That was TMI and now I’ve made things awkward!”

“No, no, you’re fine!” Riley assured her. “Trust me. As a reporter, I’ve heard every damn thing. That’s not even in the top ten for most awkward.”

Lilith smiled wanly. “I’d like to hear that top ten list then.”

“Sure. We should get drinks sometime.”

“Really?” The sketch artist searched her face to see if she was joking.

“Yeah, why not?”

“Okay, yeah, I’d like that.” This time, the smile was bigger, brighter. Lilith didn’t have a lot of friends, tended to be socially awkward, and was used to being somewhat of a pariah in certain upper society circles because of her status as the bastard child of an extramarital affair.

Riley eased the door open to peer through the crack. “Unless you have any information about the case you’re willing to give me, I need to get back out there.”

Meanwhile, in Interrogation Room One…

“I get it.” Flynn eyed the man sitting across the table from him. “Beautiful woman. Rich, powerful husband. You don’t want to get sidewise with him, so when Trent started blackmailing her, threatening her—”

“I told you I know nothing about that!” Dean yanked on the chains holding him to the table, making the hard metal slam against the wood with a satisfying clang.

“You didn’t know he was blackmailing her?”

“No!”

“Did you know he found out about the affair?”

“No!”

“So, you don’t deny the affair?”

“What?” Dean looked up at him with a defeated expression. “No.”

“Okay, good. We’re getting somewhere. So, you were sleeping with her and—”

“I love her!”

“Okay, okay.” Flynn held his hands up in surrender. “You’re in love. And this man threatened her—”

Dean heaved a sigh and slumped back in his seat. “How many times do I have to tell you that I knew nothing about that?”

Interrogation Room Two….

“Here you go, buddy.” Liam sat a bottle of ice-cold water on the table and slid it across to the CEO of Sloan Enterprises. “Sorry about all this. But we have evidence your wife is having an affair and was being blackmailed by the victim. You understand how that gives you motive, right?”

William fixed the detective with a steely glare, remaining silent.

“So, how did it go down? She missed a payment? He called you up and told you? When confronted with proof of the affair, you snapped, shot the messenger so to speak? It’s understandable. Heat of the moment. The sooner you tell me what happened, the sooner I can help you.”

William leaned forward and pushed the water bottle back across the table. “I want my lawyer. Now!”

Interrogation Room Three….

Bertrand stood in the doorway of the room in his somehow perfectly pressed suit and tapped a file folder against the palm of his other hand as he regarded the woman in front of him. “Did you do it yourself, or did you have someone else shoot him? Leo Rys, maybe?”

Katie sniffed as she lifted an imperious gaze to the man across from her. “I had nothing to do with Trent’s death, but I would certainly like to thank whoever did. He was the worst kind of pond scum, and he won’t be missed.”

“Not exactly the type of sentiments that will exonerate you, Mrs. Sloan.”

She gave him a coy smile. “Please. Call me Katie.”

Bertrand’s dour expression never changed. “I don’t think you grasp the gravity of the situation, Mrs. Sloan.”

A mirthful laugh bubbled out of her. “I’m not worried because I didn’t do it.”

“Who else had more of a motive than you?”

“I don’t know. Why don’t you talk to that psycho he cheated on me with?” Her face lit up with clear hatred.

Bertrand languidly raised an eyebrow. “And that would be?”

“Sabrina Simmons!”

“Are they still an item?”

“If they are, he’s cheating on her, I guarantee it, and you know what they say about a woman scorned. Besides, she has a history of stalking behavior. She’s fucking crazy!”

Bertrand made a noncommittal sound in his throat as he jotted the name down on his notepad.

Back in the main office area…

Riley was trying to sweet talk a crime scene investigator when Drake caught up with her. “Rashad. That’s a beautiful name.”

“Thanks.” Even with his dark complexion, the blush that spread across his features was noticeable.

“There you are!” Drake’s voice boomed out as he grasped her upper arm firmly and pulled her away from Rashad. “I think we’re overdue for a conversation.”

“I’m sure I don’t know what—”

Rashad was suddenly serious. “Hey! Is everything okay?”

Riley’s eyes darted back and forth between the two men, noting the tension in both sets of shoulders. Diffusing the situation was preferable to escalating it, so she smiled sweetly at Rashad. “It’s fine. He’s right. We have a previous…. agreement we need to discuss.”

“Oh.” The other man looked disappointed, but excused himself with a regretful glance back at the reporter.

“Did you rat me out to the cops, Riley?” Drake asked as he pulled her to the side of the room for a private conversation.

“Absolutely not.”

“Then why have I been brought in for questioning? Why is my client in an interrogation room right now?”

“Your client is in an interrogation room because his wife got busted with her lover tonight by the lead detective on the case.” Riley pulled her arm out of his grasp, but moved her body closer to his. “As for figuring out he hired you as a PI, I’m assuming that was their own detective work because I did not rat you out!”

He wanted to believe her. All CCPD had to do to find him was to run Sloan’s financials. Or Max’s. “Hm. Why do I have a feeling you’re going to be a giant pain in my ass? Tell me this, who pointed them in the Sloan’s direction in the first place?”

“A private citizen who witnessed—”

Drake’s lips pressed into a thin line as he shook his head. “Maxwell Beaumont was not a private citizen when he took those photographs!”

A scathing voice cut through their conversation. “Did she sleep with you for information, too?”

They both turned to find Liam approaching, with Max hot on his heels.

Drake took a step back in confusion. “What? We haven’t slept together!”

“Yet,” Max mumbled under his breath. His eyes widened when he realized Liam might have heard him. He cleared his throat and began to fiddle with his camera, pretending to ignore the conversation.

Riley shot a murderous expression at Liam. “For the last time, Liam, that’s not what happened!”

Drake blinked as he processed the insinuation. Moving his attention back to Riley, he asked, “You slept with him for information?”

“No, I did not.” She replied through gritted teeth.

“Come on, Walker.” Liam gestured toward the interrogation room. “We need to have a discussion about what services you provided for William Sloan.”

Drake turned his head to watch Riley over his shoulder as he followed the detective, mumbling the whole time about client privacy.

As Liam and Drake walked down the hall toward the interrogation rooms, they passed William Sloan and his lawyer, Sadie McGraw, on their way out.

The moment Madeleine saw William and Sadie, she scurried after them, apologizing profusely for the misunderstanding.

Bertrand and Flynn walked into the open office area deep in conversation, comparing notes about their respective interrogations. Olivia approached them before they could make it to Bertrand’s office, a dark haired young man trailing behind her. She wasted no time demanding answers about the investigation.

Bertrand ushered everyone into his office, where the DA was given all the latest updates on the case.

When the detectives were finished talking, Olivia nodded her head. “Between Trent’s bank account showing deposits from Katie and Dean’s confession of the affair, I think Kiara will sign off on a search warrant for the Sloan properties and bank accounts.” She turned to bark at the law intern who had been shadowing her for weeks. “Anton! Get Judge Theron on the phone!”

“Yes, ma’am!” Anton squeaked as he fumbled for his phone.

Thirty minutes later, the CCPD had a search warrant, Drake was released from interrogation and Bertrand was yelling at Riley and Max to get out of his station house.

“What are you doing at my desk?”

Riley looked up into Liam’s stormy expression as she closed the lid of her laptop. “Updating my story. I promise I didn’t look through your files!”

“This time.”

“That’s what I said.” She gave him a disarming smile as she rose and started stuffing the computer, notepads, and pens into her taupe, Saffiano leather Kate Spade laptop tote. “I didn’t read any of your files this time.”

It had been a long day; he was tired; he was irritated; he was ready for a break in this case… and yet something about her infectious grin and the teasing lilt in her voice pulled a begrudging smile from him. He shook his head in wonderment. How did she keep getting under his skin?

He called out to her as she walked away. “Hey, Riley!”

She turned back to face him. “Yeah?”

“Thank you. Your intel was actually helpful tonight.”

Her grin broadened into a full fledged smile, lighting up her whole face. “You’re welcome, detective. See you around.”

She found Drake and Max both waiting for her at the homicide office door. She directed her attention to Drake. “What are you still doing here?”

“Just got out of interrogation, thanks to someone who doesn’t understand confidentiality.” There was no accusation in his tone, just a simple statement of fact.

“It’s not my fault your client was implicated in a homicide.”

“Oh, I’m not blaming you.” He replied as he looked past her to shoot daggers at Max.

Max blinked. “What did I do?”

Drake shook his head as he pushed off the wall he’d been leaning against. “Come on, I’ll walk you out.”

“Oh, that’s not necessary. She’s with me.” Max flushed a deep shade of crimson. “We’re both in my car, I mean!”

“Then I’ll walk you both out. Can’t be too careful. It’s late, and this is Cordonia City.”

“I’m perfectly capable of protecting her.”

Drake’s eyes ran quickly and dismissively over the younger man. “Sure you are, kid.”

The three stepped out into the dimly lit, air-conditioned hallway as Liam watched them leave with curiosity, regret, and annoyance mingling in his expression.

The ancient, decrepit elevator dinged as it rocked to a stop on the first floor and the doors slid creakily open.

Neville VanCouer was arguing with the front desk sergeant. “I heard suspects were brought in for questioning. I just want to get a statement—”

“Heard? Or read it in my story?” Riley gloated.

Neville looked like his head was about to explode. “Why were they allowed in?”

The desk sergeant’s bored expression never changed as he shrugged. “Came in with a homicide detective.”

“How?”

Another shrug from the sergeant.

Neville spun on Riley. “The updates you’ve been posting…someone is giving you insider information!”

She gave him a saccharine sweet smile. “Or I’m just a better reporter than you.”

Neville took a step toward her, but Drake moved quickly, inserting himself between Riley and the other reporter. “Why don’t you go harass someone else?”

Neville glared at Drake, but he stepped back. The showdown was broken by Neville’s photograph, who had just reappeared from the men’s room. “Hey! That’s the guy that told me there was a door open around back!”

Max lifted a shoulder innocently. “There was when I was back there.”

The other man’s eyes narrowed. “Then why haven’t any crime scene photos been published anywhere?”

“Ah…. technical difficulties.”

The photographer looked skeptically between Max and Neville, as if trying to decide if Max was lying.

Neville shook his head, “It’s not worth it, Tariq. Come on, let’s go.”

“See?” Drake was almost gloating. “You needed me.”

Riley rolled her eyes. “Neville is annoying and slimy, but he’s not dangerous.”

“Yeah,” Max chimed in, “And we’re standing in a police station.”

“Listen.” Riley decided to get the elephant in the room out of the way. “I know you think I threw you under the bus with Liam. I’ll understand if you want to cancel our dinner plans.”

“Oh, we’re still going to dinner.”

Riley’s brows furrowed in confusion. “But I thought you said—”

“I said you were going to be a giant pain in my ass.” His eyes tracked across her face. “But something tells me you’re worth all the trouble.”

[alpydk]

🌿 🌸

Good morning anon. Thanks for the ask, talking about fics I love! I did a huge post the other day so quickly going to add them in here as well. - Recommend only one hahahahahaahahahahahaahaha.

🌿Rec someone else’s BG3 fic and tell us what you like about it!

The 5 from the other day (Find the post here to see why)

Alchemy 410 Broken Horizons Weave me the Sunshine Professor Dekarios Twin Compasses

And now some more that I didn't link Weave and Woods - @weaveandwood - Honestly I just love the pairing. Auroria is such a good character who I genuinly see ending up with Gale. And it's not been all that eay relationship where they fall in love and are happy. They have their challanges. I most of all love seeing her learn new spells because that doesn't really happen in fics and its great to see. (Especially how proud she is with it.) "The second, third, fifth, ninth tries were similar. On the tenth try, she thought she saw a few sparks of electricity surrounding the arrow, sending a surge of pride through her. She was close, she could feel it. " - Come on Ori, you can do it!

---

Strange Highways - I have been on about this fic since chapter one. No fic has caught be like this. It's like it calls to my chaotic nature and I will keep screaming it into the Tumblr void like some insane looney fan. Just me alone with my billboard - READ THIS FIC. It's Cazador in a rock group in the 80's. It's funny, has amazing music referances but most of all it's just so fucking good to read.

The words spoke to his soul, into the very depths of it. He felt them with every cell of his body. This was not like the weak melodies bards played back in Faerûn. This music had authority. It had power.

Master of puppets, I'm pulling your strings

Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams

Blinded by me, you can't see a thing

Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear you scream

It was perfect. He imagined saying the words, making them his own. This was a supreme incantation, it had to be. This one would make people obey. Just Fuck Yeah!

--- Paperback Writer - (Short 600 words) - Haarlep edits Raphael's novel. It's fucking funny and I love it. Simple as. "Quivering, the hero took my hand I’m pretty sure Tav told you not to touch them, and it made you pout for a week."

And now the non Bg3 ones... because oops...

RE: Umbrella Asylum (Resident Evil) - @judasiskariot - It's got that lab, depressing, in your head build up mood. You know the one, everything is clinical but there is evil shit going on. The descriptions are fucking beautiful and I love it. "Icy blue eyes that were at least as cold as the black lenses of the glasses." - Just that about Wesker. I still think of it even now. ---- La Petite Mort - One of the most beautifully written crackfics I've ever read. Barbie/Dracula. - Just try it and love it. He should have gotten rid of her by now. Made a meal out of her, at least, even if only the once: her blood will surely be sweet, so sweet, heady and deep and dark when he drinks from her.

But he keeps finding excuses.

Not yet. If I'm honest my reading of fics has been limited recently. I have a few too many that just seem to have been abandoned and I'm becoming hesitant to start up reading newer chapter fics. I'm also a little put off when I see things at chapter 54 and then find its over 200k worth of words to catch up on. Yeah, I need to have people recommend fics to me so if people want to send me asks with their recs go ahead.

🌸Rec one of your fics and tell us what you like about it! Only one.... But I'm so good. (They say, going through the 40 fics knowing they really could be better.) I'm my own worst critic. Fuck it, you get more than one. This is my answer!

Cabinet of Oddities - It's Nana's story. What started all this chaos. It is love and adventure and mental illness and healing all rolled into one big Galemancer sized ball. 56k words of just me. I may also be writing the sequel/prequel right now... “A kiss does not necessarily have to mean love though, just as a hug certainly does not. Is that what you were expecting to feel?” He looked into her eyes. He had always been that of the hopeless romantic. As much as he wanted to believe his own words, he knew he was not the type to kiss without love, or at least potential love.

She gazed back at him. “I’m not sure. I wasn’t expecting to feel fear though.”

“And, do you fear me?” He hoped that she would say no. That maybe this feeling could blossom, that all their unspoken feelings could be revealed and yet he was also nervous of her answer. That if she said no, it would be something else holding him to this mortal coil, someone else who would eventually realise he was not good enough.  Just look how fucking good that is. (I'm not allowed to be down on myself so the other end of the spectrum it is)

--- Tattered Souls - RuganxGale (Also writing the sequel right now) - This is my ZhentWeave baby. This is all for me. I love it and that's all that matters. Honestly writing something like has been extremely liberating and I recommend everyone write something like this at some point. “Just get out of here...” Rugan’s voice was weak, his gravely tones quiet, and he tried to lift himself from the ground.

Gale spoke calmly, keeping his eyes on the mercenaries in front of him. “Not without you.” He could unleash the lightning bolt and possibly fire a magic missile before being hit if he moved quick enough.

“This isn’t your fight.” A hacking cough brought up small amounts of blood, which were spat onto the ground. “Just leave.”

An arrow flew from a trigger-happy archer whistling past Gale’s ear and he almost unleashed the lightning bolt in reaction, stopping only as he saw Rugan stand before him in defence of the female Zhentarim.

“Gale, not your fight...” Love me some cliches and tropes. Love them.

--- Okay, last rec. Not that anyone will read all of this, anyway. You're all looking for your own fics after all (I do that then get quietly depressed when my name isn't on the list... But we all do that, right? Right???)

Where is that child now, I wonder? - Gale past short (500 words). I keep thinking of this one a lot recently. Of young Gale and his relationship with his father. This is probably more a head cannon than an actual fic but it's stuck with me. - I recommend a read if you're looking for ideas. "No! I won't let my son read poetry and become like a delicate flowered prick of an elf. Weak, pathetic! No, he will do as I say and do it when I tell him to!" 

Again, thanks for the ask. I do love talking about recommendations and I have a number of Chase whump fics on the bookmarks list, as well as a few quick one shots I've enjoyed. Would love recs from others as said - The more angst the better. :)

[t4tozier]

(Sorry if this to dark there’s some non con/dubious consent/ coercion stuff between Jace and porter ahead);

Ok but I think we’re all ignoring the creepy and entitled potential of Porter like man literally planned to make himself a god! And was perfectly fine killing and using literal children’s (teenagers but still) along with his coworkers.

Like it’s never shown how much control Porter and the rage crystals have over those that have them, but Brennan did call it a high mind and the Porter could make those affected feel physical sensations like pain.

So same as in canon Porter kills Jace and resurrects him with a rage crystal. At that time they were just coworkers and the only reason Porter went after him was because Jace as a sorcerer must understand magic and Jace being a relatively recent hire was still trying to befriend and get along with everyone (it made it so easy to ask Jace if he’d like to do some sparring in the woods where they’d be sure not to cause damage to the school, one quick strick to the back of the head while jace walked ahead chatting about something random) plus no one new him well enough to question any sudden anger related personality changes.

So Jace is brought back and it’s almost like he he has a permanent state of suggestion cast on him, whatever Porter thinks and feel trickle down to Jace so if Porter truly believes bringing back a god just to kill them and take their place is the right thing to do then Jace thinks helping him is also the right thing to do.

Porter then begins to develop some thoughts and feelings towards Jace which Jace of course can’t help but reciprocate and act the way Porter wants him to and ends up a toxic sexual driven relationship.

Porter justifys all this thinking if he’s a god (well almost a god) he should be able to take whatever he wants and in fact Jace should be grateful porters showing so much interest in him.

Jace is just along for the ride and it isn’t until the plan fails and he’s resurrected along with the rat grinders (no rage crystals this time), that he’s finally able to think clearly and sort through his thoughts and realise that those emotions and feelings weren’t his own and everything was controlled by Porter.

It definitely fucks him up what Porter did (he won’t call it rape because he wasn’t strictly forced into it and it’s wasn’t porters original goal, it definitely is rape since Jace couldn’t actually consent to anything with Porter).

Buts he’s a sorcerer so of course has high charisma and puts that to full use acting like everything’s fine in front of others, tries to catch up on the teaching he missed helps the rat grinders anyway he can (they may still be little morons, but they’re his little morons now).

The rat grinders also start being more open about the control Porter and the rage crystals had over them; jawbone absolutely makes sure they all attend therapy and his counselling sessions.

Then them being kids without must real world experience occasionally mention or bring up stuff they saw Porter do and say to jace without really realising how bad it was (Porter: I killed you once I’ll do it again stardiamond) and jawbone ends ups coming to a very dark but accurate conclusion on what happened between Porter and Jace. Xx

i have a feeling someone else will take this and run with it because angst is not my brand here at t4tozier <3

however i do agree that TRG and jace would be severely fucked up post failed ascension especially if we take it this route where jace doesn’t really have any autonomy during his shatterstar period. i want to see jawbone being a good counselor to the rat grinders and not letting his personal biases get in the way!! or referring them to outside help because lbr they all need more than the school guidance counselor he isn’t a licensed therapist.

i think it takes jace a long time to accept what happened because he’s so used to putting on the mask for everyone around him, plus his memory for those years is so fuzzy, and porter was so manipulative that it’s hard to determine what’s real and what he imagined. he gets there, though. next step is just. moving on. easy, right?

[echoghost1]

Five Fav Fics

got tagged by @jackdaw-sprite to pick 5 of my favorite fics that I've written! (here's their list)

this is gonna be hard cuz I have over 100 to chose from... ( ╯□╰ )

at least they don't have to be complete right?

Under the read more are the ones I chose

These aren't in order, just five that I picked

Carnival Mythika

Summary: What starts as a fun day at the carnival takes a turn after an innocent mistake. Danny gets separated from his friends at the carnival and asks the fortune teller for help to put him in the right direction, or maybe just back to the place he last saw them, the Cryptid Zoo.

Reason: this fic is my baby 😭 it's practically a novel and it really won't be that hard to change a few things and make this an original story because of how much of an AU it is. It's not done yet and it's taking me forever to write mostly because I keep having to take breaks because the emotional parts are so fricken heavy. Danny goes through it. he has a horrible time and it's all emotional trauma If you haven't read it, which it's an over 60k incomplete work with lots of angst and heavy topics, so I don't blame you. BUT if you wanna just read ch. 3 and let me know what you think （*＾-＾*）

Lively Conversations In Dead Man’s Land

Summary: Danny goes on a voluntary field trip to help his suffering grades.

Reason: This is one of the first fics I ever wrote way back in 2013 during PhannieMay (now DannyMay). The prompt was Western and I just went ham with a fluffy GrayGhost field trip fic. I had so much fun writing it and I still enjoy it today.

Quoth the Librarian, “But I’m Alone?”

Summary: Eleanor loved her job at the school library. She always made sure to come in early to make sure everything was just right before the students came. Today something beat her there.

Reason: One of the many fics I wrote for my first phic phight (2021) that I liked but it didn’t get much traction. The premise is simple, just a “what happened to this side character after a scene from the show” + making up a random OC that may never be used again.

Parallels

Summary: It's amazing the things you learn on a field trip.

Reason: My take on a reveal fic where Maddie & Danny try to have a normal mother-son bonding time during a field trip only for Danny to get triggered by something innocuous. A big part of the reason I’m proud of it was because I figured the trigger was so obvious but every comment that mentioned it was surprised by how perfect it was despite having never thought of it themselves.

A Night in La Casa del Sol

Summary: La Casa del Sol is an abandoned Bed and Breakfast on the North end of town, which like any good dilapidated building, has the reputation of being haunted. Paulina may act like an airhead, but she can still put two and two together. If her favorite ghost only comes out of hiding when there's another ghost around, she sure hopes her Abuela was right about the place. Danny is fist clueless, and then just confused, but mostly wants to make sure Paulina doesn't get hurt. Besides, what's the worst that could happen? Another sleepless night?

Reason: Even though it took me a while to add the final chapter to this one I think it was worth the wait. I had fun with a more classic haunted house type horror of Paulina and Danny exploring the old B&B together. That and that last chapter man, I don’t want to spoil it if you haven’t read it or if you did and forgot (it has been three years since I posted that final chapter lol)

And honorable mention goes to...

I think it would be illegal for me not to mention jackdaw’s favorite bedtime story 😜

Lost and Found

Summary: His parents had always warned him about the dangers in the woods.

Reason: Fae AU! Lost Time flavored Fae AU even! Also, like I said, Jackdaw really enjoys it If you don’t believe me check the comment section on that fic But I also really like it too. It was fun to write and it had my two favorite things, an au and taking an idea someone else did but putting my own spin on it! Fun fact: the final spoken bit of dialogue was actually the very first line that I thought of. It’s what made me write this story. It was just so good. And I’m happy to report that it did in fact pay off

[smytherines]

got very excited when i saw u reblog the anon post thats been going around bc u deserve all the compliments. every compliment ever

as someone who's kinda still slightly new to this fandom, youre one of my favourite creators!! you're always interacting w others abt ideas and just having a blast discussing different aspects of the show, the amount of thought u put in all of ur posts is so incredible. the fact u love saf so!! much!! how u consider every aspect of the show w so much detail, how you have such beautiful complex characterisations of them. the way u write them in chwm is just sooooooo!!! you just care so MUCH about these characters and this show and it makes me so fucking happy. you really make such a wonderful impact on the community space. thank you sososososo much for caring as much as u do abt our silly little spies i cant explain how much we appreciate it <3

(also, the woodworking thing u made is actually SO CRAZY COOL IM OBSESSED W IT. YOU DID THAT. WITH YOUR HANDS. AND TREE SHIT. THATS SO FUCKING CRAZY. the detail is impeccable, the shapes of curtwen's silhouettes are made w such care, AUGH woodworking is such a cool art form and ur so amazing for being so good at it im lowkey jealous)

(also also so sorry if this is slightly incoherent, i am very sleep deprived but i really wanted to send something in)

Oh wow, thank you so much! I honestly worry sometimes because I can get kinda intense and write obscenely long responses and theories and headcanons, and I worry that it just makes me kind of tedious and irritating to everyone else. Just like our boy Agent Curt Mega, I am ADHD, so rejection sensitive dysphoria is something I have to manage pretty much constantly. So it really means a lot to know I'm not being a pain in the ass for everyone.

I'm absolutely thrilled to see chwm get a shoutout!!! So thank you for that. It was a total accident, it was only ever supposed to be that first chapter, but I sort of fell in love with that fic and decided I had to fold it into the larger series I was originally planning. I just adore getting to get inside these characters heads, to explain the way I see them in a more artistic way as opposed to long theory posts (although obviously I love those too). They're fascinating, messy, beautiful, horrible, compelling characters, and every chapter I post I just say a little prayer that I'm doing justice to them.

I'm actually finishing up the epilogue for chwm in between answering these asks, so that should be up by morning. I'm gonna spend most of May doing writing projects for Curtwen week, and then I have the sequel/next installment mostly mapped out to start working on after that!

I'm also thrilled to see a shoutout for the wood segmentation project! It was a lot of work, but I'm so happy with how it turned out! I can't really draw or do a lot of the immediate, visual stuff that our wonderful talented fandom artists can, but woodworking is something I love and I just had to find a way to honor this show I love so much with it. I've considered a few ideas for another SAF woodworking project, but I'll probably be focused on writing for the immediate future, so we'll see if I can make it happen.

Seriously though, thank you for this very kind ask, it really felt so good to read

[beheadedhoward]

HIHIHI THIS IS MY INTRO POST THING FOR MY PINNED!! :3 ITS NOT VERY WELL PUT TOGETHER BUT I'LL FIX IT EVENTUALLY I SWEARRRR

-------------------------------------

DNI

mainly just basic dni criteria (racist, lgbtqphobic, ableist, etc)

radinclus and radexclus, terf, antineoprns/antixenogender, zionist

nsfw accounts and proshippers

-------------------------------------

ABOUT ME :3

my name is robbie or kenz/kenzie, idrc what im called but those are like always good kinda names for me yk

he/ghost and really any neoprns, dont use it/its for me unless we're close pls

im NOT used to tumblr yet ive barely used it until a few days ago but ive had it for a while, im one of those twitter refugees from that one time. so that might explain some stuff yk

this is not my main i made this just for six and other musicals maybe. my main is @/feelterribleinc

I am autistic, bpd, bipolar, anxiety and cptsd

im a trans guy (and prob bigender with that but like mostly a guy) and bi, also aroacespec

I AM A MINOR!!!

i am always way too scared to message first so if you ever want to become friends or talk to me you have to do it first I will not ever get the hint!!!

i am cringe but i am free or whatever o7

i experience delusions often! i am delusional! a lot of the time its harmful things but i won't talk about those often! less harmful delusions of mine are genuinely believing i am someone else/a character i like

im an artist and a kind of writer!! all my art is on my main rn, but keep in mind most of the art there rn is old

im very very very passionate about my interests be warned ...

-------------------------------------

WHAT I LIKE:0c

this will be a list of my main interests, and some music i like and some musicals ive seen

main interests:

Six (obv)

^ because of this, the tudor family and royals in general !

Monster High

Scott Pilgrim

Coraline

MLP

TADC

SpongeBob (more so the musical than the show, but both either way)

Into The Woods

Musicals I like/have seen:

Six

SpongeBob

Legally Blonde

Addams Family

West Side Story (havent seen the newer one tho)

Matilda

High School Musical

Dear Evan Hansen

Into The Woods

Hamilton (I saw it live on broadway in May!!!)

this list will be updated as i watch more so. yaur !

Music:

The Front Bottoms

Pierce The Veil

Penelope Scott

System Of a Down

Korn

Mommy Long Legs

My Chemical Romance

Sublime

and a LOT more.

after here isnt as important BUT i would like it to be read if you so desire

if youre not reading on, thank you for reading byee:3

more info regarding the fandoms im in

i am VERY passionate abt my fav ships and such (i'll list my main ones that will be posted abt at the bottom of this section)

i headcanon my favs very heavily, and it will show when I draw them or write about them

this blog is mainly for six the musical but im deffo gonna use it for other stuff, MOSTLY musicals but whatever I post is what I post. my main is more insanity about everything I like tho

my main ships: araleyn, clevemour, parrward, plankaren, patbob

(also: not at the same time as the other six ships but parrleyn, katanna, parrmour, aramour)

if you read to here thanks! and bye!! if you have questions then uh yeah do your thing

THANK YOU GOODBYE XO BABYS

[loustyleshtommo]

I posted 5,375 times in 2022

124 posts created (2%)

5,251 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@writtenalloveryourface28

@blushingpizza

@technicallysideacc

@bluewinnerangel

@i-was-once-a-flower

I tagged 1,196 of my posts in 2022

#louis tomlinson - 74 posts

#larry stylinson - 50 posts

#darling sweetheart beautiful - 46 posts

#harry styles - 45 posts

#crying 😂😂😂😂 - 31 posts

#taylor swift - 24 posts

#i love seeing lou happy - 22 posts

#kaylor - 22 posts

#adorable unhinged smolbean - 18 posts

#lou’s beautiful it’s true - 18 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#what if ​the teasing has nothing to do with his actual height but everything to do with how he finds ‘smolbean’ offensive instead of endeari

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Why Perfect is totally about Taylor Swift

Yea I know Louis wrote the song with Harry and that’s exactly why I’m even MORE convinced that it’s about her.

Long story short, the description of Taylor’s physical characteristics minus her gender and how tall she is could practically fit Louis to the T. She is the PERFECT stand-in for a het narrative if Harry ever wants to write about Louis’s eyes, which is always, but I digress.

Meanwhile, Harry has green eyes and tattoos. Liz Huett has green eyes and Dianna Agron has tattoos. Harry is the PERFECT stand-in for a het narrative if Taylor ever wants to write about her ex-girlfriends, which should probably be never, but she couldn’t help herself. What should be over burrowed under my skin in heart-stopping waves of hurt and all that.

Good thing H is also tall. So when Tay wrote Karlie into Wildest Dream, Harry Styles™️ can take all the credits for HIM (which was totally written from Dianna’s POV but that’s another story for another time, just like how Out Of The Wood was totally written from Louis’s POV but again I digress.)

See the whole premise of Perfect is that “I might never be [things you expect an actual good lover to be] but I can be the one [for this specific setting aka when we’re stuck in the closet]”

So, yes, I constantly think about how Louis’s big Swift bird tattoo is related to Every bait and switch was a work of arts.

Like how it’s been ages, different stages, comes so far from Princess Park & This dorm was once a madhouse, I made a joke well it’s made for me:

See the full post

31 notes - Posted May 10, 2022

#4

Not sure if someone did this already but I put coordinates from YouAreHome.Co on Google map. So feel free to do all the street view FBI?

51 notes - Posted March 18, 2022

#3

The vibe of H’s As It Was is like an idealistic child who’s screaming IT’S NOT FAIR into the world while Lou’s Change is like a disillusioned kid who’s trying to hold it together in an unfair world and tell his friend that it’s okay, even when things aren’t fair, I’m still by your side, see?

52 notes - Posted April 2, 2022

#2

My 2 cents on Taylor’s love life speculation:

She loves music and reads a lot. With how much time she always spend practicing and developing the skills of her crafts, she didn’t have that many friends growing up. Like creative kids everywhere, she started making arts through others’ lens. Her life experience as a child is not as dramatic and interesting to write about as a fix-it fic for Romeo and Juliet. Oh yeah, she started writing fan fic in a song.

She knew all she’s ever wanted was to make good music for a living. But that wasn’t a stable career’s path in the eyes of any sensible adults. So of course, her parents supported her but also encouraged her to have a plan B. Thus, the path to future @swiftonsecurity began. Because tinkering on the computer also allowed her to explore more sides of music, two birds in one stone, see?

Taylor was a smart kiddo. She didn’t need to actually go through a breakup to know how much it hurt. Hell, she saw her best friend went through heartbreak cuz somebody else changed their minds and the marriage of her own parents fell apart.

So when it came to choosing between a chance at love and a music career, it wasn’t even a choice for her fourteen-year-old self. It’s MUSIC. Of course, it’s music. A boyfriend, no matter how good they seemed at the start, will eventually break your heart. Stephen and Drew could get a fast track for that in her song. There.

So she jumped into the music industry headfirst, diving right in to the gigs and performing everywhere she got a chance. Basically hustle and put it the work. After signing with label, she quickly learned that “relationship” was part of the job and would help her realize her music career. Ok, cool. It’s not like she was slamming on her guitar to look for true love anyway. If saying she was dating someone when she wrote the song meant more album sales, then tell the story she would.

Then, her debut albums sold. Like they really did. Now, she had a band. For real, her very own The Agency. So cool. Opening the stage for her favorite artists. Best year of her life. And she might have a crush on the fiddle player. Emily. Who’s so cool she’s quitting the band after a year to go study in law school. Taylor would miss her a lot. Like a lot. Cuz this was the first time Taylor was kinda falling in love and it felt safe. almost FEARLESS. But no, actually. She found out that Emily didn’t necessarily want to quit the band. But apparently Taylor had been too obvious about being into Emily that the higher ups in the label suspected that she might be gay. And so they got rid of Emily, so to speak, to keep things from getting out of hands.

Oh wow, that sucks. Taylor was getting the taste of how manipulative the Music Industry Behemoth could potentially be. She turned to music for solace, as always. By herself too, cuz she didn’t know who else she could trust to SPEAK NOW. She made a villainous character out of the shadowy figure controlling things in the background. So it’s not all rainbow and butterflies anymore. But hey! It’s okay. She still have her fans, her friends, and Liz. Gosh. Liz was the awesomest. She could make anything fun, even in the sometime terrible circumstances. Liz made bad days more bearable. It didn’t matter if Taylor had to talk about Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, John Mayer, or a thousand other boys to sell the albums. Liz understood what it’s like to WANT TO MAKE IT in the music industry. Liz wanted to make it too. Liz was there make things okay at the end of the day. Liz was also shoved so far into the closet to keep her career by Taylor’s side. Liz got her own PR boyfriend to parade around. Fuck.

Suddenly, this wasn’t so cool anymore. They started fighting all the time. Ugly jealousy reared it’s head in the cruelest way. Taylor didn’t know how to deal with seeing Liz with someone else. Liz threw it all back in her face cuz guess who had had to deal with their significant other’s MULTIPLE PR boytoys. Suddenly, Taylor realized THIS this was what & why Emily NOPED out of there at the first sign of trouble. Music industry is very good at breaking down people and their relationships. Taylor and Liz broke up and oh LIZ HELD GRUDGES LIKE NO OTHERS. Because in her POV? She willingly walked into the closet for Taylor and got dumped for it wtf?? Meanwhile Taylor was just choosing between a) stay with Liz so she could be deliriously happy in-between bouts of absolute misery, b) breakup with Liz so she could start picking the pieces of herself that the music industry had broken her into.

Then Taylor got the news that Emily was getting married. And it hit her like a ton of brick that she could’ve had that with Liz if they could just talk it out and not let the resentment cloud their judgement. But no, there was no way that could’ve happened with Liz due to both of their personalities clashing like fire. It was opposite attracted, passion turned to ashes—burning red.

So Taylor threw herself into making RED. She met Dianna, and sorta maybe moving on from Liz. She wanted to take it slow and made sure that this wasn’t just a rebound. But Liz wasn’t ready to let go. She saw Swiftgron taking off and wouldn’t you know it. Liz, too, saw RED.

And, oh it burned when Taylor saw what PR relationship with her was doing to Harry. And Louis. It was like looking into the mirror and recognizing the SAME HURT. In a blink of an eye, Taylor knew THIS COULD NOT GO ON. This had to end. This MUST END. With her. With Harry. For whoever comes next. Because Liz was on warpath, tearing up Taylor’s heart and screwing up Dianna’s trust. All because Liz was SO FUCKING HURT by the SAME GODDAMN THING.

Harry and Louis had a good thing going so nothing was gonna changed that. Not on Taylor’s watch. Not on Ed fookin Sheeran’s watch. Suddenly, Taylor met this enigma of a British man. So blasé with public perception of him and trust his own music enough to look at label and say “you need me, I don’t need you.” SUDDENLY. SUDDEN-FUCKING-LY. It made sense. No artist = no music = no money for label. The fans are fans of her MUSIC not her label. Suddenly, EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED.

And Taylor was, all at once, at her most powerful and vulnerable. Everything else but her career was falling apart. Dianna proposed, Taylor wasn’t ready. Liz showing up in their life again meant Dianna thought there was another reason Taylor said no to her proposal. Who was Liz to dissuade her otherwise. Taylor broke her heart and now someone else broke Taylor’s. All’s fair in love and war, isn’t it? But my goodness, Liz was not a monster. It’s just that. Hurt people hurts people. Taylor knew that and understood that. CUE Louis just being like NO. NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT. “You said so yourself—we are never ever ever getting back together. Like ever. NO.” And proceeded to write DIANA. Because Taylor is not the only protective one in this chosen family goddamnit. So Taylor sent back STYLE to basically explain that if it was HARRY LOUIS wouldn’t say the same. And Harry was like HOLD UP, you cheated on Dianna with Liz? Wtf? I though Dianna was mad at me? And Taylor was like. NO! WTF is wrong with you. Me & Di already broke up and it’s frankly none of your business whether me and Liz get back together or not. (She wasn’t getting back together with Liz but these boys were pissing her off so Taylor felt zero ounce of guilt as she dragged Harry’s and his accented drawl on stage at the AMA)

Cue Ed’s Photogragh cuz the siblings are bickering like smol children for the world to see. And they all actually talked it out like adults for once. Taylor was healing emotionally while she making 1989 and hanging out with Karlie who showed up right when everything was quite fine and dandy on the outside and absolute dumpster fire on the inside.

Because other than dealing with Liz-Dianna nonexistent love triangle drama, Taylor was bestowed another heartbreak as she learned more and more about the horrific nature of her contracts. And not just her own, every other artists’s too. So it’s taking a lot of plotting and planning for her to figure out how to escape Big Machine and by extension Scooter. Karlie knew she was threading on thin water, walking a fine line, balancing on a tightrope when her girlfriend and boss would soon be going toe-to-toe. And Taylor was terrified of if Karlie decided that the closeting was too much. Also, the exes gossip? Not only were the hetero ones still on paper, the Liz & Dianna one was still fanning the flame. Like if Louis & Harry of all people thought that of her, then who else wouldn’t?

Well, Louis and Harry = stubborn little shits but they weren’t actual dickheads. So they wrote a song to convince her that YES TRYING WITH KARLIE IS A GOOD IDEA. PERFECT.

Because Karlie Kloss knew what she was getting herself into right from the get-go. There wasn’t gonna be a surprise intervention, closeting, exes who could show up and screw up everything. HONESTY IS THE KEY.

And so it went. Taylor and Karlie against the world. “I tried to pick my battle til the battle picked me.” After 1989, it was the end of the line for Taylor and Big Machine. The old contract was set to expired soon and Taylor needed to choose her next career move.

And while negotiations could’ve been where she was headed, what happened to Louis and Harry absolutely changed her mind. Louis signed another contract with Syco and it dragged Louis’s reputation through mud with babygate. So Taylor knew then, beyond the shadow of the doubt, that no label was truly on the artist’s side. At the end of the day, she was on her own.

But not really, she had her Swifties. When she began her reputation era, Taylor finally realized that she COULD be anywhere/do anything regardless of label and pubic perception of her. In fact, any label would be lucky to have her. Just like Ed said before, “You need me, I don’t need you.”

So, now Taylor knows what the labels have on artists are built on a house of cards. And it’s ALL LIES.

While she can’t directly call out or contradict the liars on her own behalf, she can and do call out the blatant abuse on others—starting with her prologue letter for reputation “as if inspiration for music is as simple and basic as a paternity test.”

Despite the pain they inflicted on each other, Liz taught Taylor how to go on a warpath. Dianna taught her how to be brave even when it hurt like hell. Emily taught her when to run.

Karlie runs with her. If other girls, like Lily and co, join their marathon every once in a while, well it’s the choice they made together and frankly? Good for them, sharing the love and all.

And oh, I forgot to mention practically all the boys she “dated” after Harry, because at that point “dating Taylor Swift” had become synonymous with “coming out as gay in a subtle way” in my mind, so.

72 notes - Posted February 13, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

After hearing ‘Nothing New’, I’m more convinced that ever that Taylor wrote Wonderland in 1989 about her own relationship in comparison to that of Harry Styles and how the music industry kinda broke them both.

Cuz “I felt your arms twisted around me” is nothing short of forced and painful.

When 1D exploded to stardom, Harry Styles WAS “the kind of radiance you only have at seventeen” and Taylor Swift had been in the business for half a decade at that point. “How did I go from growing up to breaking down?”

Then: “How can a person knows everything at 18 but nothing at 22?”

For Harry, Louis made damn sure he knew “I have loved you since we were 18.”

Meanwhile, Taylor had been dealing with one heartbreak after another like Emily Poe getting married “so casually cruel in the name of being honest”, Liz Huett leaving “fuck-the-patriarchy keychain on the ground”, Emma Stone “some actress asking me what happened” before she met Dianna Agron, at which point her insecurities had reached the point of “would you still want me when I’m nothing new?”

Then: “I knew I had to go back home.”

This is what hurt the most, I think. Because HOME for Harry has always been LOUIS “When you’re lost, I’ll find the way I’ll be your light.” But Taylor didn’t have that and Dianna literally had the inspiration for WONDERLAND tattooed on her waist, as if to say “it’s me, for you. I could stay.” But well, that tattoo didn’t stay either.

Though this Swift bird tattoo stays and fookin reminded her of Fearless:

“Tell me do you still remember feeling young, strong enough to get it wrong in front of all these people.”

To which Taylor responded: “sometimes giving up is the strong thing. Sometimes to run is the brave thing.”

Which led me straight gay to Kaylor’s Big Sur “you don’t have to save me but would you run away with me? YES”

See the full post

82 notes - Posted February 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[nights-nonsensical-ramblings]

I posted 2,717 times in 2022

That's 2,464 more posts than 2021!

221 posts created (8%)

2,496 posts reblogged (92%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@niyana-the-ambiguous-mobian

@doomfox

@help-i-need-a-cool-username

@autisticshadowthehedgehog

I tagged 2,303 of my posts in 2022

Only 15% of my posts had no tags

#sonic - 796 posts

#night reblogs art - 754 posts

#knuckles the echidna - 612 posts

#knuckles wachowski - 411 posts

#sonic movie - 389 posts

#sonic wachowski - 374 posts

#sonic the hedgehog - 356 posts

#tails wachowski - 354 posts

#video - 283 posts

#miles tails prower - 271 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#i was scrolling and thought i had come across one of those old and not quite popularenough to gain legendary only seen in screen shot status

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

boom and movie interaction ideas

scu tails and sonic keep getting people to have a hand shake with scu knuckles. theyll just be off to the side grinning wildly as someone makes the huge mistake of offering scu knuckles a hand shake who is doing his best and trying to be polite so of course gives them one without realizing how much pain he causes.

scu sonic probably got most of his belonging when was living in the cave by collecting stuff people had thrown away so sees nothing wrong with rummaging through garbage. And getting confused when someone calls Sticks out for doing it. “But people throw good things away all the time”

Sticks and scu tails being boomerang buddies. 

Scu sonic thinks amy’s giant hammer is one of the the coolest things

everyone gets “donut lord/pretzel lady” style nicknames

The Boom team trying to explain to scu tails and sonic that spying on someone to learn about them is not how to make friends 

dave the intern says something vaguely rude towards scu tails and scu sonic and knuckles take this as an insult to their little brother. and are ready to jump the counter and throw hands in their little brothers honor.

scu tail won’t stop making deadly and intense weaponry. (like the wedding cake exploder gun thing) and at one point  gets yelled at by Amy “WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THAT” “idk seemed fun”

the miles electric has caused a LOT of trouble (they didn’t tell anyone about the hologram function at first) some incidents include: a hologram repeatedly entering a room from the same door and everyone loosing their mind. using it to look like scu tails beat boom sonic to somewhere. an incident that caused sticks to run into the woods and not be see for hours

344 notes - Posted May 4, 2022

#4

general sonic headcannons

Rouge made team dark play untitled goose game. It quickly became one of their favorite games.

Sonic was once in the city and got the impulsive thought of “grab pigeon”  and he succeeded. Sonic then stood there for five minutes processing what to do next because his brain hadn’t come up with what to do next.

Knuckles has an extremely skewed sense of time. Like he sees midnight as a reasonable time for visits, he’ll have breakfast anywhere between 1 am and 11 am, he’s willing to wait for what everyone else considers absurd amounts of time but to him are nothing.

Silver loves collecting random trinkets. Especially things that most people these days would take for granted, everyone likes to give him random items to see his face light up with wonder.

Silver lives half in the present and half in the future.

Big gives the best hugs. Team Chaotix especially appreciate them during winter.

Not a single person in the group uses a chair in a normal way.

351 notes - Posted September 12, 2022

#3

Another thing I love about the sonic movies (that gives me major neurodivergent vibes) is seeing how the kids are leaning by mimicking.

We have sonic in the first movie copying Tom with pressing the ice to his face and Maddie with the yoga (come to think of it a majority of Sonics learning probably was from mimicry) oh yeah the trying to smash a bottle of a guys head because he saw it in a movie.

Then Tails with the dance sequence (I’m sure there was more but I can’t think of it off of the top of my head)

And knuckles getting ready to join the battle just like the older warriors. and especially the scene where he sees Robotnik playing around and acting destructive to the sonic hologram and then proceeds to do it himself. Or how sonic throws sand so he starts doing it to (I love this scene it really help remind you that they’re teenagers who went through hell and had to grow up too fast)    And The particular way he uses a handshake or power bump once he learns what they are.

I know there’s more examples of all three of them doing this but I’ll have them to rewatch the films to remember 

anyway they’re neurodivergent and I love them for it.

369 notes - Posted May 1, 2022

#2

i notice a lot of fanart likes to portray SCU sonic as being around waist height to boom sonic and following that logic I used these two screenshots to try and compare the scu and boom characters 

They where the closest I found where all the characters where standing straight/neutral in a line and all basically the same distance from the camera.

So I lined them up, put scu sonic at about waist height and measured them.

See the full post

392 notes - Posted May 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Idk I think this is the dynamics they’d have.

424 notes - Posted August 30, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[something-named-vexxie]

jazz anon is back with the "get a grip comment," i didnt see that comment at first bc theres 4k reblogs on it. i thought u were referring to breezybee who said "you dont have to interact with this post." while it seems rude in your perspective, i think my point still stands (when i said its like going to the soup store to buy clothes. or bringing up bach on a post about rock music). i think kiton (OP of the post) was fed up with everyone missing the point of their post. i think i would be a little annoyed too if i wanted to talk abt a genre important to me and everyone tagged it as people who didnt have a huge part in it or if people tagged it as fictional characters. in fact, people were tagging kiton's post with the guy from lala land, frank sinatra, and matt damon from the mr ripley movie. and then you replied to the post with a pop song, which is completely off topic. and i saw someone else tagging it as will wood, even though id say hes more rock, indie, folk, and alternative than jazz. theres so much that goes into what genre something belongs to, like how the instruments are used, how its sung, and so on. a trumpet or a saxophone being in a song doesnt make it automatically jazz. if that were the case, careless whisper would be a jazz song (its not btw). sure, saying "get a grip" may not be the most productive thing in the world, but i couldnt blame kiton for it. people kept derailing the conversation or tagging it with people who werent important to the genre in any way. and yeah kiton made a public post, so people are gonna say whatever. but its a two way street. people are gonna say whatever to the stuff you publicly post as well. in the replies section of the post, kiton does actually say why theyre upset. their replies are still on the post in case u wanted to read it for urself. id say more, but i dont want to repeat myself a bc my points are based off of what OP said.

Jazz anon hii!

Nah breezybee is fine, it didnt help my situation too much but i forgot about it pretty quickly (i also dont remember who anyone is, i didnt memorize any of the usernames)

The reason I brought up the song I did was cause I thought it was a jazz song, I don’t know what pop sounds like (or jazz apparently)

I can understand OP being fed up with people derailing it by talking about everything but jazz and I didn’t mean to be one of those people (I thought I was talking about jazz). Tbh if I was talking about, like, My Little Pony or something and people kept responding by talking about Star Stable Online or irl horse things I probably would’ve been agitated too because that was not the topic (this is just an example I’ve never talked about MLP and had someone talk about SSO)

I didn’t mean to push the situation further by throwing a screwdriver in the drill head pile, I was just unable to tell the difference -m-“

If OP is aware of me and jazz anon’s exchange, sorry about that, it was a mistake on my part ^^”

Extra: I’ve never heard careless whisper before, thanks for letting me know it’s not jazz in advance ☝️