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totaldramafan-lauri · 2 years ago

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Eurovision 2023 Opinions, Predictions, and Rankings

Here it iiiiiiiiiiis~!

This flew by a bit smoother than I expected. When I first heard, I had to start this earlier than I thought, I panicked, like....worried that I wasn’t ready yet. But I was. Listening to each song for this post, I realized that my opinions on each one were already set in stone, so there was nothing to adjust. I just needed to get in the headspace to write it all down. XD Oh my god, I’m such a bad writer....

But with THIS bunch of songs, how could I lose motivation!? While it’s true that this is the year I had to regretfully bring back the “dislike” tier, last used for one song in 2018, for two songs now....I can’t lie and say I’m not totally hyped for this. I still like the vast majority, and the good stuff is REALLY REALLY REEEEEAAAAALLY good! While there’s no runaway favorite like last year, my favorites this year are a really solid group, probably one of my best top sevens in a while! My number seven was even fought over for a while, which shows how strong the competition was!

The word of the year is: energy! While there are still some downbeat songs, even those have life to them, and I count the ballads on literally one hand. This year seems to be a rebuttal to the “Eurofans complaining about ballads every single year even in years where there are barely any ballads”....How they gonna do that now, huh? Not to mention, the amount of songs I can describe with the word “intense” is a lot higher than usual, too, which gives 2023 its own identity! For now...We’ll see if next year is the same way. XD

One of the other things I’m hyped for is the juries now being final-only (something I’d been wanting for YEARS) means the semifinals are now a free-for-all with no more worries about a “jury bait” song no one else wanted through making it to the finals. Europe has ALL the power to choose who lives and who dies- I mean, who stays and who goes!

Now, before I get to the reviews, I have a note about my rankings: I’ve noticed that, most years, my “like” tier is....overly-crowded. Which doesn’t seem like a problem, but.....because of how many songs there tend to be in that one tier, the difference between the top and bottom of it started getting....really stark. At the top will be songs I really enjoy at any time, right below my borderlines, and at the bottom will be songs I like in the moment, but never have any desire to listen to again after the contest. Those are.......two vastly different kinds of like, sooooo....I’ve split the tier in half to make it easier! The “Really Like” tier are the songs I....well, really like and enjoy even if they don’t blow me away, and the plain “Like” tier are songs that I like for now, but can’t see myself revisiting often after the contest. OK? Make sense?

Please keep in mind that these are JUST my opinions. I don’t always agree with what’s the most popular, and I have a few underdog favorites. I’m not a critic, I’m just a fan who really really likes talking about Eurovision. If you disagree with me, I don’t care. I don’t wanna act like everyone has to.

Also, as always, I have no idea how any of these songs will be staged, cuz I like going in blind on that, so visuals have no influence on my ranking. This is JUST about the songs.

Nooooooow, without further ado....

(In alphabetical order by country) (Also, I'm naming the artists now, wooooo, took me long enough)

Song: "Duje" by Albina & Familja Kelmendi Country: Albania Thoughts: A lotta countries are being off-the-wall and/or taking risks this year....Albania are not one of them. I might sound a bit harsh here, but...I KNOW that Albania can send different stuff, and GOOD stuff, so....when they keep doing this kinda thing, constantly, year after year, songs that are good, but are all practically the same, it gets tiring! That's part of why I kinda liked them last year- last year was, uh....it was definitely unique! XD But this year, they're right back to the norm. Song in Albanian by female singer with soaring chorus and ethnic-sounding instrumental. Again. All these songs are good, don't get me wrong, but after each contest, they all run together. When Albania DO send songs that stand out, it's usually in a good way, so I wish they'd do that more often! Or send Mr. Bushpepa again, please! XD Prediction: Looks like this is one case where I'm not alone. This song's been getting overlooked a lot, toward the bottom of the betting odds. I don't think I can completely discount them, since the second semi is FULL of overlooked songs, but....I....I still don't think they'll qualify. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if I was wrong, however.

Song: "Dear Future Lover" by Brunette Country: Armenia Thoughts: IT'S LIKE A DAYDREAM BUT I GOT SOME OTHER BETTER PLANS / I WANNA SCREAM AND SHOUT, MY HEART CAUGHT IN CHAINS! / CRUEL HEART, CRUEL HANDS, FIRE IN MY VEINS, FIRE IN MY VEINS, HEART IN CHAINS- *cough* Uh, s-sorry, about that.....Um, yeah, this song's a grower, but it's mainly that frantic breakdown that sticks with me. The rest of the song is....fine. But THAT part? I feel it SO BADLY, UGH! "I've been hypnotized by someone that I've never ever met" and the mention of panic attacks especially....When I first heard this song, I interpreted it as her simply being in love with love - not having someone yet, but just wanting the feeling of being in love itself SO BADLY....but I actually think I was wrong. I think she DOES have a person in mind here, but it's someone she's never met, and admires from afar...something like that? Maybe it could be either or. But either way, this song overall isn't one of the best to me, but it happens to contain a sequence of some of my favorite lyrics of the year, which elevated it up a few spots on the ranking by itself. Prediction: I....I think this song might be a biiiiit....overrated? Or maybe it's me not being overall crazy about it, combined with how it's tipped to do well when being performed second in its semifinal, but the same can't be said for the OTHER song that’s performed second a couple days before, huh? Huh? >__> *grumble* ....can't even be too pissed, 'm used to it....B-but, uh, Armenia are gonna qualify, and probably finish in the top half in the final.

Song: "Promise" by Voyager Country: Australia Thoughts: DANG IT, AUSTRALIA!!! DANG YOOOOUUUU!! How'm I supposed to oppose your continued participation in this contest when you flipping BLOW MY MIND with your entry like this!?!? AAAAAAAAAAAAA, I would be frustrated if I wasn't too busy freaking out! I will never forget how blindsided I was the first time I heard this song's chorus, being so taken by the sheer intensity of...well, EVERYTHING after that point...from every burst of energy, to the desperately optimistic-sounding lyrics that fit the tone so well, to the buildup to that flipping AMAZING instrumental, and how the whole thing engulfs you with its intensity until the very last second, leaving you almost breathless....and I'm happy to say that this song's impact has NOT lessened with repeated listens. And before you start thinking it, NO, this doesn't have to do with any metal bias, OK? Metal is NOT my favorite genre of music! It's actually one I'm usually pretty picky with! But for some reason, Eurovision keeps doing metal right for me. The screaming isn't overdone, which helps, but it's not just that, it's just the MOOD that really gets me. ......Yyyyyeah, if I didn't make it obvious enough, this is my favorite song of the year. Not by a LOT - I love my second-favorite almost just as much - but it's still an honor I have to....reluctantly....bestow Australia. Good work. Now I have to root for you. I cannot lie to myself. ....But it's gonna be alright. Prediction: Ending the second semifinal with a bang! Yeah, combined with their popularity, that's gonna pretty much end with a guaranteed qualification to the final....and thank GOD, cuz the rest of my favorite songs in that semi are screwed. At least my number one isn't. XD As long as nothing goes terribly wrong, I'll be able to be happy with the results. This one song is all I need. And in the final, ummmmm....I-I don't think this'll be a front-runner, but....maybe left side of the board at least? Is that reasonable? I-I'm trying not to get my hopes too high....

Song: "Who The Hell Is Edgar?" by Teya & Salena Country: Austria Thoughts: OK, so....I underestimated this song WAAAAAYYYYYY too much at first. In terms of growers, this is an EASY second place to Iceland’s entry, but in a much different way then that one. Altho, give me a break, I'm FAR from the only one. This is a song that NEEDS multiple listens to understand, cuz on your first listen, you absolutely WILL NOT take it seriously. I was SO ready to brush this off as the new "Eat Your Salad", just a catchy song with an absolutely insane subject that I can't wrap my head around. WHY would you send a jazz pop song about being green of all things to Eurovision? Why would you send a song about being possessed by Edgar Allen Poe to Eurovision? But no, that's not what this is. This song has a lot to say, and it's very clever about it. Sure, it's still fun and super catchy, but there's more to it. I....I honestly can't sum it all up in words, cuz there's so much there, and there's probably been a lot of people dissecting this song's lyrics who did a much better job than me. In particular, if you can, search for the comment of someone named JXO in the comment section of the music video. They do a great job explaining it. It took many a listen for me to GET this song fully, but once I got it, I started appreciating it a loooooooot more. Seriously, that moment when it finally hit me that it disguising itself as a joke song was THE POINT ("At least it pays to be funny"), I just about lost my mind! BIG BRAIN MOMENT! Literally one of my favorite single lyrics of the year. This may not be one of my favorites, but it's without a doubt one of the most unique and clever songs I've ever heard. It's smart, while also being genuinely fun at the same time. Prediction: At this point, I think they're a safe bet to qualify. They're getting a lot of attention, and most of it that I've seen has been unironic, so that's a really good sign! I'm glad people are taking this song as seriously as it deserves! It's WAY too unique to be overlooked, AND it doesn't have a lot of strong competition in the second semifinal. This is making it to the final, no doubt at all. I wouldn't be surprised if it places high in the final, too, so to be safe I'll predict left side of the board, maybe even bottom half of the top ten.

Song: "Tell Me More" by TuralTuranX Country: Azerbaijan Thoughts: This is a song I think I was a bit too mean to when I first heard it. I'd interpreted the lyrics as being gross and pushy, kinda like "omaga", when I doubt that was the intention at all. While he does continually ask about "us", and there's that "I know what you looking for, it's love" part, I moreso just wanna think of this as playful flirting, nothing more. But that isn't the main reason I warmed up to this song....nah, most of that comes from that flipping bridge that does NOT deserve the right to go as hard for me as it does (which is everything from "I wanna buy a land a thousand miles away" all the way to "That is looooove, loooooooove, loooooOOOOOOVE"). In fact, the rest of the song is just OK. That bridge carries this song! The way it steadily builds and builds with every line as it goes is soooooo good! That bridge deserves a better song, pfffff....but yeah, overall, this song's kinda just there for the most part outside of the one part I really like (kinda similar to the Armenian entry), but that part does last long enough for me to say I like the song. Prediction: Will most likely qualify due to being Azerbaijan, but probably won't do too well in the final. I can see this getting overshadowed easily. Maybe....the last quarter of the board? Now that we know they can do that badly, cuz that's what happened to poor "Mata Hari"....this is the kinda song that actually deserves that placing, if you ask me.

Song: "Because Of You" by Gustaph Country: Belgium Thoughts: This is a fun one! Definitely one of the happiest songs we have, and definitely one that I enjoy a lot even if it isn't one of my favorites. Just a good time to be had whenever I hear it! What more is there to say? It's a feel-good song about finding happiness through your love for someone! Learning to love yourself because they love you....That's the dream, honestly.....Someone to give me hope to believe in myself and be optimistic.....Right now, I do have someone like that, who helped me carry on when I was at a low point, but that's....d-different....it's a different kinda relationship. B-but....eh, if it still makes me think of that, then I'm not complaining. It's something to relate this song to, and thus, make me like it more. I mean, there's no explicit references to romance in this song, so it could be about what I have, or, heck, it could even just be about friendship! Just...anyone who's close to you and brightens up your day, you can sing this to them! It's a very versatile song, huh? XD Not only that, but that beat is so good! Not one of the best, but it's a happy song that sounds happy, about being happy! It's even a bit triumphant in tone too..."Remember when they tried to break us? Well look at us now!" It's like a song for the end credits, a victory lap following a dark time in one's life finally being over. If you don't like this song, who hurt you? Prediction: Betting odds be darned in this case, I'm predicting this'll make it to the final. It HAS to. It's one of the standouts in the second semifinal, if you ask me! And it's sure to make an impact and put people in a good mood, so why not? Buuuut in the final it might not do so well. I'm gonna say it might even be towards the bottom. Once mixed in with the better energetic songs from the first semi plus the auto-qualifiers, this song might fall a bit flat. >__<;

Song: "Mama ŠČ!" by Let 3 Country: Croatia Thoughts: Ahahaha....hahahahaha what the heck. XD I still have a hard time wrapping my head around this song, to be honest. It's probably THE hardest song to rank this year. I do get its meaning now, and yeah it's kinda similar to the Austrian entry in being a silly song with a message to tell you, but this one isn't as clever and the message is a lot more obvious. Also it's a worse song. I'M SORRY- i-it's just so weird! My favorite part of the song, when it actually gets a good beat, starts at two minutes in when there's barely any time left, and the rest of it is just kinda....I wouldn't say disjointed, but it's VERY silly. I'm glad that this song went in the silly direction, allowing us to have fun, rather than be like....the OTHER anti-war song this year, ugh....so, props to Croatia. If you HAVE to say something like this, hide it well rather than play it depressingly straight. .....That being said, I LIKE this song, but would I listen to it on my own time? No. Prediction: With that being said, of COURSE it's qualifying for the final, c'mon, I'm not stupid! Why wouldn't it? It's so memorable, and seems very loved already. I can imagine some cool staging to go with it, too! So, yeah, absolutely a no-brainer. That's right, Croatia are coming for revenge for 2021 and riding their tractor STRAIGHT to the final this time! And given how poor Croatia's results have been this past decade, this thing will pretty easily give them their best result in a loooooooooong while...While I'm not sure if I'd AGREE with it, we'll see. Maybe I'll be surprised. This song is the definition of "wildcard". XD

Song: "Break A Broken Heart" by Andrew Lambrou Country: Cyprus Thoughts: There's always gotta be at least one of these, huh....a song that reminds me of a character I like? And have a hard time looking at with an....unbiased perspective? Always at least one...but thankfully, I was able to remove my bias a bit quicker this time, cuz it's really only a few lines and not the WHOLE song. This song is about a breakup, but that line in the chorus about being left in "the garden" immediately brought to mind one of my character crushes that I was previously obsessed with, and lines like "I'm torn apart, but now I'm a survivor" didn't help matters. I know that it's not overly-specific, but that ONE line had my brain interpreting every lyric and picking them apart to see how fitting each one was. And thankfully, the kiss line reminded me "Hey, it's not about that, it's about romance, dummy", so yeah, it's not the whole song. But the lyrics are still what make this song. Even little stuff like "You did your best to do your worst" are good. And his voice is good. Overall a pretty solid song that I probably wouldn't rank so high if it weren't for the lyrics and that memorable first impression, but I still do like a lot. I hope my broken heart never gets broken again....a survivor indeed... Prediction: I don't think this is qualifying. It's not getting a lotta attention, and is ranked low for most people. I'll admit that music-wise, it's not catchy enough, or emotional enough, or punchy enough. It's just....there. And I say that as someone who likes it. I gotta be truthful. The lyrics are why I like it, and most people prolly aren't gonna care too much. So, nah, not qualifying. Cyprus can definitely do better.

Song: "My Sister's Crown" by Vesna Country: Czech Republic (Czechia) Thoughts: And the award for "Unexpectedly Catchy" goes to.....Yeah, this is one of the bigger growers of the year easily. When I first heard it, I thought it'd settle around mid for me, but nope! Not only is this a powerful song, with a message many can rally behind...but, in terms of sheer catchiness, this isn't that far behind the likes of Poland's, Moldova's, and Austria's songs...although I'll admit that most of the catchiness is contained in the chorus alone. That part will NOT leave my head! Just repeating, over and over, like an incantation almost! XD This is a song I really do like, but I can't think of much to say about it. It's all surface level here. The music is good, the lyrics are good, it's just an overall solid song that doesn't blow me away. Prediction: It seems like this song's getting a lotta attention! Whoa! Just outside the top ten in the betting odds? Interesting...I personally don't think it's THAT good, but not complaining seeing an underrated country get more attention! Yeah, they're qualifying and doing fairly well in the final. My prediction will be "better than last year" (where they came 22nd), but not a front-runner.

Song: "Breaking My Heart" by Reiley Country: Denmark Thoughts: Well, if there was any song this year that combined sad lyrics with an oddly happy, poppy beat, it'd be this, huh? "I'm not scared to love you, but I'm scared of breaking my heart" sounds like a very emotional line on paper, but here he is singing it like it's just another thing....maybe that was the point? Eh, I'm nitpicking and being weird, cuz I actually like that kind of dissonance if it's done right....and also I like this song in general. It's not a favorite, nor is it even a big standout, but it's one that I just...never forget about. The lyrics stuck with me without me making an effort to learn them (kinda like "Space Man"), and I find myself subconsciously singing it sometimes, mainly the "On and oooooooff~ Couldn't meet me in the middle" pre-chorus for some reason. The lyrics are overall good, and make this song better, but the chill vibe of the song overall makes it unique this year too. Overall, solid song, not a favorite, but a reliable one that I don't get super duper into, but I can count on to never get old either. Prediction: I have nooooo idea why this song's not getting more attention, but eh, not the MOST underrated song I like this year by a longshot...It's also in the weaker semifinal, and in my opinion, is one of the better songs in it (that has a chance to qualify). I wouldn't write them off. They could still do it. So....yeah, why not, I predict they'll prove people wrong and be a surprise qualifier. Like I said before, it's unique....If they don't make it, I'll probably blame them having to open the semifinal. Not really what I'd call a good opener....

Song: "Bridges" by Alika Country: Estonia Prediction: I wanna like this song....I wanna like it SO much....when I'm paying attention to it, I feel the lyrics a LOT. I really relate to wanting to bring down my walls and build bridges instead, trying to move on from all the pain I went through before...putting it behind me, and...more than anything...asking for closure. B-but, I hate to say it....the keywords there are "when I'm paying attention". I HATE saying this about an entry from Estonia, after all the slam dunks they've put out recently like "Hope" and "The Lucky One", but in this absolute joy of a year, this song is the only one that actually makes me check out during it. I REALLY don't wanna call it boring, cuz it HAS merits! I just said them! But it's definitely the closest thing TO boring this time. And I really couldn't tell you why, when I like other slower stuff this year more. But...that's just how it is. Great lyrics, good voice, but gets buried under everything else when I'm not making an effort to listen to said lyrics. This is the only song I'd say I'm indifferent to this year, but it's VERY close to being a like. As it is, I still like it more than other songs I've been indifferent to like "Rockstars". Prediction: I...normally wouldn't think they'd qualify, but it's the weaker semifinal, so I wouldn't completely count them out if the staging's good. It's still Estonia, so I wouldn't be surprised if they pull it off. It'd definitely be at the cost of a song I like more, so I hope not, but...eh, I'll get to my two underdog favorites in the second semi later, but short answer: I'm already mentally prepared to lose them. If Estonia get in and it doesn't cost Australia, I won't mind. I don't hate this song. So....sure, I'll say they'll qualify. I gotta predict at least a few surprises, and this one might be one of them.

Song: "Cha Cha Cha" by Käärijä Country: Finland Thoughts: After only two years, Finland are already a fan-favorite again! Usually they wait a lot longer for that.....Finland are a country that have been good at appealing to my taste specifically, sending top three songs for five flipping years in a row (not counting 2020), but for Eurovision itself, they usually just cannot catch a break even if their song's good, which makes me EXTRA HYPED when their entries DO get attention. Do I think they deserve the buzz this year....? OH HECK YEAH THEY DO!!! THIS SONG IS EVERYTHING!! THIS IS HOW YOU EUROVISION IN A NEW, EXCITING WAY!! THIS is how you do it! This song is a VERY close second-favorite behind Australia for me, with my decision of liking Australia's entry more coming down to lyrics and nitpicks. I could've easily have made it a tie, but couldn't do that when the ONE THING about this song that I can even remotely call critical is that the lyrics aren't much, while the lyrics of Australia's song enhanced it. But....does that EVEN MATTER!? Do you even CARE what he's talking about when the music is just THAT GOOD!? Fittingly, my top two songs both got similar reactions outta me on first listen - I was blindsided by this. I do NOT expect the directions this song went in, and was flipping out the whole way. The fact that I was THIS invested in a song that I expected not to be taken seriously was embarrassing.....UNTIL I learned how loved it was, and now, I'm not holding anything back! CHA CHA CHACHA CHA CHA CHA!! My favorite thing about this song is that it's intense and hard, but still fun and catchy the same time! It's like....somehow managing to combine what I love about Australia's and Malta's entries, and it's flipping awesome! ESPECIALLY once the second half starts. The rapping isn't bad either, but I'm glad the whole song isn't like that. XD Then I'd have to call it nu metal, pffff.....Uuuuuhhhh, s-sorry this section's so long, I just flipping ADORE this song and I can't express how happy that Finland are getting attention for it. MAN, at this point, if in a future year, Finland send in even so much as a mid song, my disappointment will be immeasurable and my day will be ruined. XD Prediction: I WAS SO HYPED FOR THIS THAT I ACTUALLY SEARCHED "HELSINKI 2024" ON TWITTER TO SEE HOW MANY PEOPLE MENTIONED THAT, PFFFFFFF!! I am SO rooting for this song to win. Holy crap, Finland have been LONG overdue for another win, and even if this doesn't achieve that, it'll still be the CLOSEST they've gotten to it this decade....FINLAND DESERVE IT!! However, going up against Sweden, who sent Loreen, makes me doubt what'll happen. It could go either way. I love both songs, just this one a lot more. Seeing Finland not only get their second win, but manage to beat SWEDEN as their biggest competition, would be immensely satisfying, but might not happen, so I'll try not to get my hopes too high. All I know is that no matter what, this awesome, intensely fun song will at least finish in the top ten, and that'll be enough for me already....and no doubt the televoters in particular are gonna EAT THIS UP. If Finland vs. Sweden gets really close in the jury vote, Finland will win just due to the televotes. So....uh, yeah, I want it to win, but at the same time I'm not gonna jump on the idea. I just REALLY REALLY want it somehow, it'd be so cool, so unlike any other winning song up till no- *ahem* S-sorry, uhhh.....top five at least.

Song: "Évidemment" by La Zarra Country: France Thoughts: Good to know France didn't let what happened last year slow them down, and they went ahead and sent another banger! God, this is a good one! SO close to borderline tier for me, this song won me over super quickly with its infectious, disco-esque beat. It's very big and grand, while also being something I can just vibe to! AND I can give it uniqueness points! The perfect combination! It's one of those songs that I can't really say so much about, cuz I'd just be talking in circles. Uhhh....her voice is also really good? That's all I got. XD Really, just listen to it. It speaks for itself. Just extremely solid. Prediction: My prediction is JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED! Seriously, last year's robbery still bugs me whenever I think about it cuz there was no reason for it to happen....but I already complained about that enough. Point is, with how much attention this song's getting, that will NOT be happening again, and France will be getting what they deserve for sending a fun, unique song this time! Even though there are songs I enjoy more, I have no problem with this being in the top five fan-favorites as the betting odds show cuz they still deserve it! Now, I don't really see them winning (as of right now, no songs except the ones from Finland and Sweden are screaming "winner material", but that could easily change with the live performances), but top five? Why not, right? Sure, they could not do as well as expected, and fall off a bit, but....well, it's still France....um....y-yeah, I'm gonna be a bit safter and say top ten. They deserve top five, tho.

Song: "Echo" by Iru Country: Georgia Thoughts: So....this is definitely my favorite entry from Georgia for quite a few years, altho that's not really a high bar....but, with that being said, it's still comparatively mid. Good news is that for me, "mid" still means I like it. XD Yeah, this song's pretty good. I have a hard time understanding her without subtitles (I was hearing "My love is my crown" as "My love is like rain" for a while), but her voice is still great, and the whole song feels so....big and grand. But I can't rank it higher cuz for everything I just praised, there's at least one other song this year that I think does it better. This song's got a lot of power, but there are more powerful songs I like more (one even flat NAMED "Power", featuring an even better singer). Cuz of that, I find myself....not really thinking about this song much, sorry.....but when it comes on, I do enjoy it. It's better as a minor pump-up song playing in the background rather than something I give my full attention to. Sorry, Georgia, I know you're trying, it's just very bad luck of who you're up against.... Prediction: This could go either way. It's the second semifinal, where less fan-favorites are, but it's also still Georgia, an unlucky country. It's toward the middle in the betting odds, too, which is no help....Hmmmmm.....Um....I don't think they'll qualify, but they could also be a wildcard. If they surprise me, that'll be fine, too...? There are better songs, but as long as Australia make it, I won't complain about anything else, including this.

Song: "Blood & Glitter" by Lord Of The Lost Country: Germany Thoughts: Hoooooooly CRAP! Germany are certainly trying to put on a spectacle this year, huh? Well, I'd say they might succeed at that! We'll see how the staging goes, cuz this song deserves a SHOW!! I listen to this song, and I'm immediately brought back to "Hard Rock Hallelujah"...just, this BIG metal song that feels like it could fill an entire stadium even with the studio version. This is a song that BEGS to be performed in front of an audience with those booming vocals and screams. It's such a BIG-sounding song, which is what I love about it. It sounds BIG. And it cries out not in anger, but in....happiness? "We're so happy we could die", huh? More like....happiness in a "LET IT ALL GO!!" way, heck yeah! That feels good! Now, would I call this a better song than "Hard Rock Hallelujah"? No, but I can at least say I like the vocals more on this one. That's just an opinion, however. It's true that I don't care for the verses as much as the chorus here, and in terms of hard songs that pump me up, this is kinda in the shadow of Australia's and Finland's entries, but I still really really like this song, and it's a borderline favorite. Can't wait to see it live! Prediction: Honestly surprised that this isn't getting more attention...but it's not doing badly right now in the betting odds, so it might gain momentum in the final. The Eurovision audience has overall been liking the harder stuff recently (besides...."Jezebel", unfortunately...haaaahhhh....) so I can see this doing pretty well! I would NOT call it a front-runner, but maybe top 15? Is that safe enough to assume? This'll definitely give Germany their best result since 2018.

Song: "What They Say" by Victor Vernicos Country: Greece Thoughts: This was one of my picks for least-favorite when I first heard it, cuz I considered it the closest thing to a boring song of the bunch. But, surprisingly, it grew on me a bit, and now I like it! Still on the low end, but hardly worth complaining over. Turns out, Estonia's song was the one I couldn't get into instead....weird how that worked out, but first impressions can be misleading sometimes, and here's the proof. XD Anyway, this song's fine. Perfectly serviceable. Not a standout in any way, but the lyrics are pretty good in places. Fun fact: for days before finally watching with subtitles, I was mishearing one line of the chorus, and I STILL can't unhear it afterwards. I don't hear "Lost souls make sure no one loses their way", I hear "Lassos make sure no one loses their way". Yup...and I was like, "What, so you lasso someone to keep them from wandering off? What? Are you talking about horses now, whaaaaaa-" So....that was a thing. XD Probably the most notable part of this song, and it's just a mistake of mine. Haha....I got nothing left to say. Prediction: This one could easily go either way....Greece have qualified with less popular songs before, but they've failed to qualify twice, so they're not invincible anymore. And this song is just SO....unremarkable, that I can see this not sticking with people. Yet, the semifinal its in doesn't give it TOO much competition, so....I dunno, maybe! But I'm gonna be bold and say they're not qualifying. Hey, I gotta answer what feels right, and cuz there's no more jury to consider, I don't think Greece will have that much chance.

Song: "Power" by Diljá Country: Iceland Thoughts: I....I still can't explain it. I really can't. I just....can't. This lady's voice is just....it's incredible, and she needs more attention, period, end of discussion. ....O-OK, I'll talk a bit more, it's one of my favorite songs after all. But...what else is there? It's the biggest grower of the year! I always have at least one major underdog favorite that I have a hard time explaining the appeal of. Two years ago, that song was "Amen". Last year, it was "Breathe". This year, it's this. That kinda song that scratches my brain in just the right way and makes me FEEL, but I have a hard time conveying that in text. At least this time, I have a BIT more of an explanation, which is just "vocals go brrrrrr". HER VOICE, I SWEAR! This song is SO FUN to sing along to. "Whooooaaaa-oooooaaaa-ooooOOOOAAAAAA~! You have no p-p-p-POwer, ooooover me!" Her runs, her growls, just the overall sound, her voice is perfect, at least in this song! That would be enough for me to love this, but as an added bonus, the lyrics are also great, that voice I love doing an AMAZING job at portraying a cry of freedom from a possibly-toxic person! I think I did a good enough job explaining myself....Yeah, this song won't stand out to most people. I didn't think it would to me, either. Outside of her voice, this song doesn't have anything super special about it, I'll admit it. But gosh dang do I love it. I REALLY wish more people could give it some love. Prediction: Now....uh....I don't think they're a completely lost cause....There's a chance that she could sound just as amazing live, combined with good staging, and it'll save their odds and get them on people's radar! ......But that's wishful thinking. Y-yeah, I'm not completely giving up on them (like I am with my other second semi underdog I'll be talking about later), but I'm not getting my hopes up, either. A lot of people are gonna overlook this song and it'll go down easier for me by accepting that. I don't think they'll qualify....

Song: "We Are One" by Wild Youth Country: Ireland Thoughts: I....I dunno what to say about this one. It's....it's SO generic, but...somehow still good at the same time? Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm just a sucker for songs with this kinda message, no matter how many time it's said. Maybe it's the kinda thing I wanna keep being reminded about now and then. The idea that I'm not alone, even when it feels like it...and that I can keep getting back up again each time I fall. We might be different, but tonight, we are one....That line kinda sums up the Eurovision spirit, doesn't it? But yeah, this song is VERY safe. The name Wild Youth is very fitting, cuz it sounds like a song written by someone very young writing their first song ever. But that's not a bad thing in this case. It's just a very simple, innocent song, and there's a place in the world for that kinda thing. Also I like the ending with the drums. Always a sucker for drums. Mhm. -v- Prediction: Ugh, I feel so BAD for Ireland! I wanna see them do well again! It's been YEARS! From 2013 to now, they've only qualified for the final ONCE! And so many of those years were with good songs, at that! They've just been so unlucky! And I HAVE to keep being unbiased and objective as possible in my predictions, so even I can't throw them any bones....This song won't do it for them. Maybe if this song was in the second semifinal, it could've had a chance to stand out more. But not the first one. There's no chance....They're gonna have to keep waiting for the Luck of the Irish to return, sad to say.

Song: "Unicorn" by Noa Kirel Country: Israel Thoughts: Oof, this one....Um, OK, first off, lemme just say that I don't come to Eurovision looking for good lyrics. Sure, there'll be a few songs with good lyrics every year, but I consider those a bonus. For the most part, I come to Eurovision for the atmosphere, and for songs that sound good. Songs with good music and bad lyrics ("Warrior" in 2015) will be placed far above songs with good lyrics and boring music ("Growing Up Is Getting Old" in 2021). I bring this up, because this song right here puts me in a conundrum. It's definitely in the former category, and I do like it fine...but it's a case where the lyrics are SO bad that it comes CLOSE to being ruined by them. But not quite. Not all the lyrics are bad, but those that are, REALLY are. Just not enough for me to not like the song as a whole. I still cannot take it seriously. It's laughable how much this song fails as an anti-haters song ("diss track", I think they're called?). She wants to say that nothing they tell her will ever break her, and that she'll keep doing her thing. OK, valid, but how does she do this? By comparing herself to a....unicorn. Yyyyyyyeah, excuse me what? A unicorn? Ummmm....yeah, that'll show 'em to mess with you, huh? Yeah...yeah, they'll surely not get back up from that one....They can say all they want, but you'll bite back with the power of a....unicorn. Just like how I dealt with bullies in grade school by telling them Pokemon were cooler than them....Fictional creatures....Only got me laughed at harder....but y'know what? You do you, I guess. Music-wise, this is good, but not the best. I like how it ramps up at the end. But when these kinds of lyrics are the most noteworthy thing about a song, I can't really rank it very high, sorry....But I do know a lot of people love this, so maybe it's just not for me. Prediction: This song being in the top ten in the betting odds is baffling, but eh, I can't be too mad. It's still a fun song that'll bring more fun to the final when it qualifies. I'll TRY not to focus too much on how this is one of my more least-favs in a packed semifinal....and how its qualification could cost me Malta....nope nope nope. I'll focus that on Switzerland. This song doesn't deserve saltiness, cuz I do get enjoyment out of it. XD This could finish in the top ten as predicted, but I'm gonna say it'll fall short of that.

Song: "Due Vite" by Marco Mengoni Country: Italy Thoughts: I'm really happy we have a returning artist from 2013 in 2023. A great blast from the past! While 2014 was the first Eurovision I liveblogged, 2013 was the first Eurovision I ever watched live period, and the first year I started taking Eurovision super seriously (altho I'd been a more passive fan for a few years before that). It's a year I look back on fondly. So, even if I didn't like this song, I'd still have a soft spot for it, cuz well...it feels like Mr. Mengoni hasn't changed one bit. This sounds SO MUCH like "L'essenziale". It didn't blow me away, but it's still a VERY pretty song that grew on me like a lot of ballads do. I literally have the exact same thoughts towards this that I did towards "L'essenziale". I think this one is, like....a smidge worse than that one, but the chorus and his voice are still really strong. Pretty good buildup too, which is what I like in my ballads. So, not a top tier Italian entry, but still a very pleasant one nonetheless. I'm using this song as my midpoint between the "really like" and "like" tiers. Everything above it are songs I'd listen to on my own time, and everything below it are songs I won't listen to often after the contest. This song is that perfect point of comparison to me, being a no-skip song I can occasionally get really into, but also isn't something I would search for on my own. Prediction: Italy are still in the top ten in the betting odds right now, but aren't as high as they usually are, so this'll probably be a breather year for them. As in, they might actually stay outta the top five this time. XD I'm still calling the bottom half of the top ten tho, like in 2013. Can't underestimate Italy too much, y'see.

Song: "Aijā" by Sudden Lights Country: Latvia Thoughts: I like this one, but I also feel bad that I don't like it more. I THOUGHT I'd like it more. On first listen, it clicked with me pretty quickly. I really resonated with the lyrics, and thought the song 'd grow on me after I learned them all. But...it stagnated. And, as other songs grew on me, it kept getting pushed down. And I couldn't tell you why. I really dunno why....this is just what happened. But I do still like the song! I still really like the chorus, and I can somewhat relate to wanting nothing more than to stay in a fantasy and not face reality even as it stares me in the face. I can relate to wanting to say the right things even when everything's collapsing. I think, ultimately, it's just the sound of the song. It's not as strong as so many others this year to me. Good, but not as good as it seemed like it'd be. Prediction: Now, as someone who likes this song but doesn't love it, I did NOT expect this to be one of my unpopular opinions. Second-to-last in the betting odds? Whaaaa??? I mean, it is Latvia, but still- Uh....geez, I do think they deserve better than that....but, welp, in terms of underrated songs in the first semifinal, I have OTHERS to worry about...If Latvia don't qualify, I won't mind. But for my prediction....ummmm.....I-I guess I'll say no. I think it might get lost. Staging could save it, but I won't bet on that. At this point, I think Latvia are in the same camp as Ireland- until the next time they send an unironic banger, they're doomed to unluckiness.

Song: "Stay" by Monika Linkytė Country: Lithuania Thoughts: One of the more major examples of the "indifferent ---> like" growers this year. I didn't think much of this song too much at first due to it being downbeat and nothing notable music-wise, only for my opinion to improve once I paid more attention to the lyrics. These are really good lyrics. I really relate to not wanting to be alone anymore, and just...asking for someone to help heal me. Especially recently, when my journey of self-improvement coincided with me discovering the music of my new favorite singer. It really does feel like he was exactly the kind of person I needed at that point in time....It seems unrelated, I know, but...th-this song reminds me of him somewhat. How he always seems so sweet and kindhearted, and makes his fans feel so loved....and how he uses his music to comfort those who need him....a real-life comfort character..."My heart is bleeding, I need your healing" indeed. However, despite this slight bias, unlike with Cyprus' entry, I can't bring myself to rank it above the plain "like" tier. Music-wise, this isn't something I'm gonna be rushing back to. I do like the repeated "Čiūto tūto" and "Finally my heart is beating" part. That's been in my head for the past couple days. And I really really want Lithuania to be more open to sending more songs in Lithuanian cuz they did that last year and I want more, so every little bit counts, pffff. XD But yeah, overall, a song that I can really feel right now, but falls short of me calling it memorable in the long run. It definitely doesn't compare to the last song named "Stay" entered in Eurovision, that's for sure! Prediction: Lithuania are HARD to make predictions for, cuz it feels like EVERY YEAR could be one or the other. XD Ummmm....for this one.....I-I guess I'll say yes...? There are plenty of less-popular songs in their semifinal that could push them forward into qualification territory. This won't be troubling the top half of the scoreboard in the final, but I think it'll be there.

Song: "Dance (Our Own Party)" by The Busker Country: Malta Thoughts: I'm sorry "Discoteque"....but I found a new favorite party song for introverts! And HERE it is, as my third-favorite song of this crazy collection....no small feat! There's a LOTTA songs that I'd call "fun" this year, and this is my favorite of them! (My top two are more "intense" than "fun" even tho Finland's is both- anyway-) And it's not just for the lyrics, altho I do love those...Never before has an introvert wanting to leave a party that's not for him sounded so.....charismatic! And that's part of the charm, definitely, but....I-I'll be honest, it's mainly about that energy for me. SUCH infectious instrumentation and such a fun beat...almost addictive, actually! Yeah, I wanna dance! I know that there've been many sax-heavy, funk-flavored songs like this before, but this is the only one of those we got this time, and DANG it's a good one. I don't even really wanna go into the details, I just wanna LISTEN to this! Nothing but fun! All the fun! I can't listen to this without smiling....even when.... Prediction: I am crushed. I am confused. I am even a bit outraged. I expected my biggest unpopular fav to be Iceland or Poland...not THIS. I expected this song to be a hit. Like, not winner material, but....y'know, something more than this right now! And why? Literally WHY? I-I can't...I just can't wrap my head around this! Malta have sent popular songs before, so why is THIS ONE falling through the cracks? Like I said, it's unique, so it should stand out! Plenty of the Eurovision audience clearly WANTS fun this year! They're giving love to other fun songs like Austria's! What the HECK!? ....I-I can't be mad while listening to this, but I don't GET IT??? ....I can't believe I'm saying this, when I thought they'd be fine....but no....This is the main reason I'm stressed over the first semi: Malta performing second. Not a good omen, and UGH......UGH, I say! I want them in the final so flipping badly...I can imagine fun staging to go with this song, too....I'm gonna be stubborn and say that they could turn it around, qualify, and proove the nonbelievers wrong, but....I-I gotta predict something, so....UGGGGHHH....the thought of flipping Switzerland qualifying over this HURTS, but....I-I'm so so sorry Malta, but second position sucks. I-I don't....I don't think this....is...gonna....happen....Prove me wrong please. Please. Prove me wrong. I DON'T WANNA LOSE YOU! You deserve to dance to the final!!

Song: "Soarele şi Luna" by Pasha Parfeni Country: Moldova Thoughts: If I didn't read his name, and recognize it after a bit, I NEVER would've guessed that this is the same guy from 2012. Never in a million years. This is SUCH a different song than that one, it's like....well, fittingly, night and day. A song this beautiful and hypnotic, coming from Mr. "This trumpet makes you my girl"? Really? What happened? It's insane to think about...but maybe that song was the exception, and most of his music is more like this? That'd be neat! (Disclaimer: I actually liked "Lăutar", it was just really silly, that's all) Cuz man, this song is just SO flipping cool...It has an almost magical atmosphere to it, kinda bringing "Spirit In The Sky" to mind, but with a bit of "SHUM" in there as well. The chorus melody is downright addictive, and the way its constantly repeated makes that worse. I still call this the second-catchiest song of the bunch after the Polish entry. It's a HARD song to shake once it's in my head. Not to mention, the whole atmosphere thing...I think this is the only song this year that I can call "atmospheric", focusing just as much on the mood as the music. It brings images to my mind in the way no other song this year does, on top of just being a beautiful song. Moldova once again prove that their serious songs can be great too, even if they're more underrated. Love this song, definitely one of my favorites. Prediction: I'm SOOOOOOOO WORRIED for Moldova, holy CRAP! While I love Malta's song more, of the two, Moldova have a better chance of qualifying, so....I-I feel like I have to root for them harder than Malta somehow? But still, the chances are not enough in their favor for me to relax here! The first semifinal is stacked, and this song is there just vibing and possibly not being everyone's thing, and the betting odds aren't much help either, showing them in the middle! They're not popular or unpopular, they're just...I dunno WHAT'LL happen to them! I REALLY hope they qualify! This song deserves cool staging, and maybe that'll help? But it'll only help them so much against this competition! I.....gosh, what to predict? The thought of them failing to qualify in favor of Switzerland, ugh....UGH, I say! Gotta be realistic, I....Y'know what...? If I get two favorites in in the form of Finland and Norway, I guess I can afford to lose two other favorites in the form of Malta and Moldova, so....sure....I-I'll be realistic. This song....i-isn't gonna qualify. But, like, it won't lose by a lot, hopefully!....*sigh* One day, a serious song by Moldova will actually get the respect it deserves....

Song: "Burning Daylight" by Mia Nicolai and Dion Cooper Country: The Netherlands Thoughts: My feelings on this one are....c-complicated. I've decided I like it, but just barely. I'm putting it right at the bottom of the “like” tier. I do think I was a SMIDGE too harsh on it for a while. It's not as depressing as I thought it was at first listen. It's just that it starts that way, but the ending reads as more uplifting ("Goodbye, old life", as in, letting go of what burdened you before). However, some of the lyrics hit....WAY too close to home for me. Specifically, "I can't find any joy anymore" and "Don't know what made me happy before". Without going into major details, I....I went through some emotional trauma during the second half of last year, resulting in me isolating myself from everyone for a few months as I got everything together. During isolation, I did discover a new interest, but before that point, I was pretty m-miserable....it really felt like my world was ending, and that I couldn't feel any joy in the things I liked (besides Splatoon 3) without a guilty conscience. It took me three months until I decided I was ready to talk again, and about a month after that until I felt almost completely normal again. It was....bad. And this song brings me back to that helplessness. I understand why others would like this song, if it speaks to them as well. So, overall, I would compare this song to "Not The Same" from Australia last year - I feel it, and I get it, but I have to be in the right mood to fully enjoy it. This one isn't nearly as good as that one was tho....but it's the closest comparison I can think of. Again, if you like this song for the same reasons I find it too heavy, you're valid. This is just what I get from it. I'd personally rather listen to the Lithuanian song, which is also about being broken and needing to heal, but that one's a lot less depressing. Prediction: In terms of the first semifinal, I will gladly take this over Switzerland, but I have a gut feeling that both will qualify, which will come at the expense of a song I like more (PLEASEnotMalta...butmaybe) I can't criticize the betters this time, cuz this is a perfect example of a song I can see the objective appeal of while not personally being that big a fan of it. I won't get salty if this qualifies. The salt will go towards Switzerland. As for what I think'll happen, uh.....mmmmm,the Netherlands' good history in recent years isn't to be ignored, so I think they'll qualify. It helps that nothing else is like this in the first semifinal, and it's being performed second-to-last. The crowd probably won't be forgetting it.

Song: "Queen Of Kings" by Alessandra Country: Norway Thoughts: Welcome back to my favorites, Norway! Missed you! I KNEW you could send an awesome song again! And even then, I wouldn’t have predicted something like this! This song may not have conquered all to me, but it came dang close, a solid fourth placer among a really respectable group of songs! Nothing to sneeze at! But yeah, what's to say about this one? Where do I start? XD It's just...really really cool and even a bit...inspiring, but the real best thing here is that CHORUS! While this might not be my favorite song, it probably has my second-favorite chorus of the year after Australia's song's. The way it BURSTS is just amazing! And, as a matter of fact, another one of the best things here is...something I haven't praised any other song for, and that's the pre-chorus of all things! That build-up gives me goosebumps sometimes! "Who will conquer aaaaaaAAAAAAALL? HER NAME IS-" and then I nearly fly outta my seat. Easily some of the best buildup of the year leading to a huge yet catchy chorus. SUCH a cool song. Makes you both fear the queen, yet be in complete awe of her at the same time. Almost leaves me at a loss of words....almost. I still found things to say, heheh.... Prediction: Thank GOD I can say that this song's safe. It's a fan-favorite (not quite as much as Finland's, but still high up there!) and thus I don't need to worry about it. THANK. GOD. Cuz I got other favorites to worry about in the first semifinal. Malta, Moldova....they need my energy. Norway, like Finland, don't. They got enough of it, pfffff.....So, yeah, will qualify, and will also be one powerful opener for the semi too! Nice choice for one, I gotta say. And in the final....probably top ten?

Song: "Solo" by Blanka Country: Poland Thoughts: Sharing a name with one of my favorite Eurovision entries of all time, huh? Definitely a hard act to follow, and yeah, this one doesn't reach that kinda level...but I love it to pieces for what it is. Yup, this is one of my favorites and I'm not even sorry. I know that this is FAR from a fan-favorite...in fact, it seems rather...hated? I-I don't really think it deserves that kinda reputation, but yeah, if you don't like this song, thinking it's just annoying or mindless, well, I'm not gonna stop you there. I really can't. But dang it, it's just too darn catchy! This melody is SO infectious I can't shake it! With my other obvious underdog favorite, the Icelandic entry, I tried to justify my love for it. But with this one, I'm not even gonna try. I'd just look stupid. When this song comes on, I just turn my brain off and vibe to it, nothing more. It's not deep or anything, it just appeals to the monkey brain part of me that likes catchiness. And while I personally find this the fun catchy and not annoying catchy (like "Lock Me In" kinda was last year), if you see it the other way, go ahead. But just like the last time I loved an unpopular Polish entry in my own corner away from everyone, I'll do so this time too. Prediction: Do I even need to say anything here? OK, to be fair, when a Polish song gets hate, it's usually by other Polish people it seems....so, maybe people who can vote for it will? Fat chance, tho...I'm not counting on this qualifying at all. Of my two second semi underdogs, Iceland have more of a chance. But I'll at least enjoy this live once! Hope it sounds good live! XD

Song: "Ai Coração" by Mimicat Country: Portugal Thoughts: Well, this is certainly more energetic than Portgual's entries usually are! Much appreciated! Nice beat, and it appeals to that "being in love feels good" genre of song I've always said I really like. So....why is it that I'm not super into this? It can't be because of the genre, cuz I have liked songs of this flavor before (I'm scared to say what it is cuz I'm not 100% sure and I don't wanna misname it, just know that my first thought was "flamenco" even tho that's a flipping DANCE so yeah, am stupid) I do like this, but it's not something I'd listen to over and over. I like it in small doses, I guess. I definitely respect it for being unique. I can see this getting old if it wasn't surrounded by songs that bring out its uniqueness. Again, I like the lyrics, I like the beat, but there are a plethora of songs I prefer to listen to. Prediction: I'm gonna actually take a bit of a chance here and predict that they'll qualify despite being on the low end of the betting odds. And I won't mind if they do (as long as they're not the reason for...M-Malta....y'know...) but I won't mind if I'm wrong either. I just feel like I have enough confidence in Portugal at this point to make this prediction. They've qualified a fair number of times with odds worse than this, AND it's a unique song. It could happen. Will definitely not be a contender in the final, tho. It'll be in the right side of the board for sure. XD

Song: "D.G.T (Off And On)" by Theodor Andrei Country: Romania Thoughts: Man, so many good vocals this year....This is a REALLY good one. I could easily see this being a borderline favorite in a weaker year. I always have a good time listening to this, it's just that it falls short compared to the songs I love more. So, here we have a really unique genre blend of a song with a fun rhythm despite being about being in an on-and-off relationship with King Dedede! ....OK, th-that last part was a joke....but it still sounds so good! I love the vocals on this. This dude's rough voice is really good, and adds a lot to make the song stand out even more. I don't really have anything else to say, I just really like the sound of this whole song! There's nothing else like it! But at the same time, if you don't like this song, I understand why. It's not for everyone. Count me on the like side, tho! Prediction: Romania dead last in the betting odds with a good song would confuse me....if the same thing didn't happen literally last year too. XD I dunno what it is with Romania that makes everyone underestimate them, but anyway....Uhhhh, this song isn't quite as good as their last one, but it's still really good, so I wouldn't write it off either. But, they are performing early....in the weaker semifinal, tho....Uhhhh....this could go either way. I wouldn't be surprised at either result. It won't be robbed if it fails, cuz this kinda song is not gonna be everyone's thing, but at the same time...I do think some people are gonna give them a chance...? So, uh....I'm gonna say....they....won't qualify. I'M SORRY, I had to answer something, and Romania have had more poor results than good ones in recent years. That's ALL it comes down to for this. But it the same thing from last year happens again, I won't be complaining!

Song: "Like An Animal" by Piqued Jacks Country: San Marino Thoughts: Yet ANOTHER banger rock song, this one a bit more of traditional rock! MAN, I really can't explain why I like this so much, I just DO....Actually, my opinion of this song has similarities to my opinion of the one from Iceland...completely different songs, but hear me out! This is an otherwise unoutstanding song that is absolutely carried by its vocals, just like that one is. Yeah, there's not really much here. The lyrics are...well, pretty generic outside of the Aphrodite reference. But DANG IT, his voice just sells everything! I can't get enough of it! I don't even care if liking something from San Marino makes me look dumb, especially as a borderline favorite, when "Adrenalina" didn't rank that high...No, this is unironically great and I will not apologize! Eat your heart out, Maroon 5! ....Ah, no pun intended....O-oh, uh, they had a song called "Animal", and it was- s-sorry, I'll shut up, I'm sounding way too American right now, pffff..... Prediction: NOPE. Even if this song's performed well, it has NO chance. While I personally prefer it, most people will prefer Slovenia's rock song which is in the same semifinal, AND they're performed super close together. This song already was getting overshadowed, but that's not gonna help at ALL. Can't help but feel kinda bad, but...l-like I said before, my attention is gonna mostly go towards Australia, so it's whatever I guess....

Song: "Samo Mi Se Spava" by Luke Black Country: Serbia Thoughts: I reiterate from my previous update: What the heck is this and why does it sound so good?? Oh, wait, I know what it is now....it symbolizes insomnia that makes you loopy. Th-that has to be it, right? He's barely singing, and he has this creepy laugh toward the end- it sounds like he's losing his mind! I think I solved the mystery, holy crap! ...I'm joking, BTW, so don't take my interpretation as fact, pffff...but yeah, I still can't get enough of this song. I'm sorry....I know it's weird, but I get SO into it whenever I hear it. That beat is WAY too infectious....My weakness for synth music strikes again. XD It's addictive, dang it! I'd listen to an instrumental version of this song and love it just as much! This hits my brain is just the right way....Ironic that the title means "I just wanna sleep" with a beat that gives me so much energy! Those breaks are EVERYTHING,I swear! I hum them more than the actual vocals. XD Literally the only thing keeping me from naming this a favorite is that I can only call this a major guilty pleasure. It's not the kinda song I'd share with people and tell them I like it....I-I'm kinda embarrassed to say I like it so much. The vocals are just so....I-I dunno what to say....overdramatic? Nah, that's too mean, but...it's not the kinda thing that you can take seriously. But screw it....maybe it's genre bias, but I love this insomnia anthem and welcome it to my top ten. Prediction: Even tho this song won't be everyone's thing, it's WAAAAAAAYYYY too memorable to count out. Even when it's being performed super early, it will NOT be buried in the slightest. XD It also hasn't been as divisive as I expected, sooooo...yeah, Serbia will qualify! And probably won't be a top ten finish in the final, but probably close outside it.

Song: "Carpe Diem" by Joker Out Country: Slovenia Thoughts: You know you've got a group of great rock songs when THIS is the worst one! Geez, to say that makes me feel guilty....cuz I still really like this! Nice energy, nice beat, and I like that it's in Slovene! When this song comes on, I enjoy it a lot! But.....it just....got overshadowed by San Marino's song to me. I was comparing them at first to decide which one I liked more, and poor Slovenia lost pretty quickly as their competition in the rock department stole my heart. Sorry....but, if it's any consolation, I think I'm in the minority. I think for most people, it'll be the other way around. XD Prediction: I....I actually think Slovenia have a chance this year! They seem to be getting more attention than usual, which was a pleasant surprise! I have zero problem with this! ....Trust me, like I said before, I'm prepared to let San Marino, Poland, and Iceland all go in favor of Australia. So having this in instead of one of those is totally fine with me. It's one of the next best things replacement-wise. XD Just as long as nothing goes horribly wrong, I can see this in the final. It's NOT a shoo-in, and if it fails, I just hope it's so that a song I like more qualifies instead...Oh, and in the final, this will be far from the top of the board. Probably down pretty low, not in flop territory, but in the bottom half. About as well as a lot of rock songs usually do.

Song: "EAEA" by Blanca Paloma Country: Spain Thoughts: I don't wanna talk about this ooooooone.....>__< People really like it apparently, and it just makes me feel bad. I KNOW there's technical skill here. I know that kinda vocal isn't easy to maintain. I KNOW I should at least be giving it uniqueness points....but, I'm sorry, I just can't take this. I don't like listening to this at all, especially the chorus. I didn't think it'd grate on me as fast as it did....but welp. And yes, it's because of the vocals. Much like with "Suus" in 2012, just cuz I can respect a singer for doing things with their voicals, doesn't mean I have to find it enjoyable to listen to. And yes, I do respect this song at least a bit, but those ear-piercing wails are wayyyy too much for me and I actively want to skip it whenever it starts (previously, the only song I disliked enough to warrant that kinda response to me had been "Amar Pelos Dois"....and while I don't like this song, let's not get carried away, huh? This one at least has life in it) I feel like I might've angered at least a few people reading, so again, I'm sorry, this is just my take, that's all! Man, I didn't wanna bring back the 'dislike' tier anytime soon, especially not in a year where there are so many hits, but....I-I can't lie to myself. I just flat don't like this song. It's too annoying. Prediction: I'm in the minority, as this song is part of the top five in the betting odds as I type this. Because of that, I can assume that Spain might be faring better than they usually do. Maybe it'll be their second top ten finish in a row, which'll be cool, I guess! I personally don't want them too, obviously, but I hold no ill will towards anyone. Maybe I'm too uncultured or something, and if that's the case, I tried to understand it better, and still didn't like it. Buuuut.....I'll try to tolerate it. I don't wanna piss off anyone who does genuinely like this song.

Song: "Tattoo" by Loreen Country: Sweden Thoughts: Masterpiece. Yeah, getting that out there right away. This song is a whole masterpiece. EVERYTHING about this is perfection. This was definitely exactly what I wanted from the return of Loreen, containing the same atmosphere and unique, borderline-ethereal presence I remember loving before. The lyrics are also really great, showing desperation just to be loved, wanting to throw yourself at the feet of someone so badly...Now, I had to lower my expectations still, cuz "Euphoria" is an all-time favorite song for me and I expected lightning not to strike twice. And....yeah, I was right about that. This song is no doubt amazing, but it fell just short of being a favorite...at least, right now. It's my number eight, so it's first in line when one of my current favs fails to qualify from a semifinal. THEN it'll be up there. But yeah, it was tough to rank this. This is a song that deserves its acclaim, and I don't understand why I'm here ranking stuff like the Icelandic and Moldovan entries above it. My taste is weird.... Prediction: Now, for the big question - will she do it again? Will Sweden FINALLY tie Ireland's record? A lotta people seem to think that way! And Eurovision back in Sweden, a country that knows how to host very well, is certainly a tempting thought...but do I wanna put my eggs in this basket? I....I normally don't like to call a pick for winner before the contest starts, so I won't. But I do call at least a few potential winners, and this is one of them. But the thing is, even tho I love this song.....it's going up against Finland. In terms of fan-favorites, I'm not gonna lie to myself....I would LOVE to see Finland beat Sweden. That would be glorious. But that's only my opinion....I do think both of them have a chance (I personally can't see any of the other top-betted songs challenging either of them either, but that could change too), and I'd be happy with either. But no matter what, Loreen is doing well. She'll be in the top three. The juries will love her too. She's an art-eest, and the song is captivating and lyrical.

Song: "Watergun" by Remo Forrer Country: Switzerland Thoughts: HEY EVERYONE! Did you know that war is bad! Because WAR IS BAD! IT'S NOT A GAME! WAR BAD, PEOPLE DIE! THOSE GUNS ARE REAL! HAHAHA CORPSES IN BODYBAGS, ISN'T THIS FUN!? This song is exhausting. Why is it here? I'm sorry, I know people like it, but....this isn't what I want in my Eurovision. I don't watch Eurovision to be reminded of things like this. Eurovision should be FUN. Croatia made the same theme fun with their entry, so I gave them a pass. The same isn't true here. Whenever this song comes on, the mood dies. It kills the atmosphere, especially when it comes on after one of the fun songs. I'm sorry if I'm coming off as rude to a song with its heart in the right place, but this kinda thing has just never been it for me. This message of "war is bad" should be common knowledge at this point, and the fact that it apparently ISN'T just makes it worse, so we have TWO songs about it this year, just- no, we don't need it. BUT, with that all being said - this is still technically a good song. It does get its desired emotional response, and although I don't like the lyrics, they're still objectively good. I also give it credit for having an...actually pretty good buildup. This song has more life to it than "Wars For Nothing" did in 2015, so I at least like it more than that one (NOT more than "Non mi evete fatto niente" tho, that one's still the only downer song I've actually enjoyed). And even this year, this isn't my least-favorite song cuz it doesn't hurt my ears like the Spanish entry. But I still don't like this song, and would rather never hear it again. I do sympathize with it, and it does its job as a song, but this isn't the kind of thing I wanna associate with Eurovision. Prediction: When I learned about the voting changes, one of my first thoughts was being happy that the semifinals are 100% televotes and that means I won't have to worry about Switzerland qualifying by being jury bait.....but NOPE, turns, out a lot of people like this and are expecting it to do well....Crap....I really don't wanna hear this in the final and have it bring its sour mood along with it, ugh.....Especially when this is the same semifinal I'm gonna likely lose Malta! I might lose Malta, and Moldova too, in favor of THIS! And there are a lot of other good songs, and it'll be stealing a spot from one them! Whyyyyyyyy!? I do not approve!! >.< But, ugh....I will admit that this song is....memorable....so yeah, I can see it qualifying, sadly. I gotta look at this rationally, and yeah, they have a chance....ugh....FINE, I'll predict they'll qualify. And in the final, they're....not gonna flop, cuz the juries will give them points. Maybe...c-close to the top ten...They'll do a lot better than I want them to.

Song: "Heart Of Steel" by TVORCHI Country: Ukraine Thoughts: After being denied the right to host, at least Ukraine didn't lose auto-finalist privileges! Good for them, cuz otherwise.....I, uh....probably wouldn't think much of this. I-I'm sorry, I know this is yet another unpopular opinion, but....this song's just...not a standout for me. I do definitely like it, and I enjoy it when it comes on. I especially like the orchestral breakdown at the bridge. That part's cool. But...listening to the lyrics, I can tell that this is trying to be yet another pump-up song, but it just falls so flat when it's competing with the rock and metal songs this year. That's STEEP competition. Don't get me wrong, the lyrics are still good, and I'd say this song does its job. There's just a lot better this year, and I feel bad for saying that. Prediction: Oh, this one's easy! Definitely somewhere in the top ten. Won't win, but will still get a fair amount of televotes dogpiled on them. They're already a fan-favorite, it seems, so, it's inevitable. XD MAYBE top five, but I'll be less specific this time and say, yeah, top ten, guaranteed.

Song: "I Wrote A Song" by Mae Muller Country: United Kingdom Thoughts: Man, what a good one to finish off the list, huh? This song's so fun! I hope it's not a bad take to say that this has some of the best lyrics of the whole bunch....cuz it does. Well, at least to me. I don't even wanna explain them, cuz they kinda speak for themselves! This is one of the most passive-aggressive revenge songs I've heard in recent memory and it is GLORIOUS. Yeah, she could've broken down, but instead, she's gonna break HIM and let everyone know about it. And she's TOTALLY NOT BITTER ABOUT IT at all! WOO! That's the spirit! Go get him! I especially love when she says she's done such a good job at keeping her composure. "My mother would be so proud", she says. XD This song just reeks of "death blow with a smile" and I flipping love it. I'm all for songs about getting over heartbreak, but stuff like this is such a fun change of pace. Music-wise, it's not a favorite of mine and there's plenty of songs I'd rather listen to, but the lyrics alone raise this song to greatness. (And honestly, writing is a good coping mechanism. I would know...) Prediction: While they're currently doing well in the betting odds, I really hesitate to say that I think lightning will strike twice in a row for the UK....but this song is really good, so maybe? I-I can't see it flopping, at least...? But I wouldn't call it a front-runner, so...top 15 or so? Maybe I'm underselling them....? I wouldn't mind them in the top ten, so....OK, fine, I'll say 10-15....I-I just don't wanna oversell them, either....at least, it won't soar as highly as the Space Man did....

Aaaaaaand, there we go, that's all of them! If you read all that, I'm sorry, but thank you for being patient with my word vomit! I had a LOT to say about most of these! But if you also scrolled ahead for my rankings, you're valid too, so I'll give you what you want already. XD Here's my rankings!

Favorites:

1. Australia 2. Finland 3. Malta 4. Norway 5. Poland 6. Iceland 7. Moldova

Borderline Favorites:

8. Sweden 9. Germany 10. Serbia 11. San Marino

Really Like:

12. France 13. Romania 14. Austria 15. Cyprus 16. Belgium 17. Czechia 18. Slovenia 19. UK 20. Denmark 21. Latvia 22. Italy

Like:

23. Lithuania 24. Armenia 25. Ukraine 26. Azerbaijan 27. Georgia 28. Israel 29. Croatia 30. Ireland 31. Portugal 32. Albania 33. Greece 34. Netherlands

Indifferent:

35. Estonia

Dislike:

36. Switzerland 37. Spain

#eurovision #opinions

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unethicalexperiments · 9 months ago

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SOOOOO this post has been in my drafts since i watched it, so i think dec 18-19-ish? and has been (mostly) unedited since so these are still my immediate reactions.

okkkkk actual archer post now. spoilers for the entire show and into the cold under the cut

i think the ending was like. i don’t wanna say “cop out” but, kind of out of left field? it felt very disconnected from the seasons leading up to it but i honestly can’t say i’m mad about it because i don’t think the post coma seasons were very good comparatively speaking to seasons 1-5. yes i know adam reed stopped writing for the show during/after season 10. i know he got tired of the setup after season 4 and that’s why we got that mess that was seasons 5-10 which was VERY up and down in terms of writing. i do, overall, like the ending and i don't think they really could have gone in another direction.

the agency was always going to have to be shut down. we’ve known since season 2 there were issues with keeping ISIS afloat, so i don’t think people really should have been surprised by that. i do appreciate that lana got the top job in the end, i don’t think archer himself would have enjoyed that job. her whole post-coma storyline with the other man i never really cared for, like yeah it does make sense for her to move on, especially with her young daughter, but robert was absolutely not the type of man lana would have been with and i thought that was bad writing. creating conflict and a solution (him being a billionaire) for the sake of creating conflict and a solution. i’m glad that ended when it did but it shouldn’t have been there in the first place imo lmao. i also want to say that while i’m not against the idea of lana and archer having a baby, i think they were destined to have some permanent tie in some way, but the way the show went about it was god awful. lana taking archer’s sperm from a bank gave fans another reason to hate the one black woman in the show, and then to give aj little to no screen time or story line after made it all feel like it was all just there to make people hate lana more. but also, what the fuck are you gonna do with a baby in a show about spies? it should have been saved for the end of the show and again i feel like this was adam reed just trying to get out of writing spy stuff (which he said regularly in interviews he grew tired of it, which, fair, but come on).

throughout the entire show pam’s character has changed so fucking much but she remained relatively consistent with regards to who she is as a person throughout. from very early on (at least season 2 if not 1) we’re shown how physically strong she is and how she actually makes a good agent. there were weird things thrown in about her personal life that i found very inconsistent with regards to her romantic/sexual relationships though. our first look into pam’s sex life is… very uncomfortable to say the least. she’s written as a sexual predator and commits assault on screen at least once in the early seasons for a “haha sexual assault is funny” moment that is never brought up again. on top of that, we’re also introduced to her being “undesirable” sexually which very quickly changes to “she fucks and she fucks WELL”. we’ve also known from the start she’s bisexual as she comes onto lana like episode 3, but then there’s a random moment in season 11 or 12 or whatever of her asking a random one off character to “be her polyamorous primary” and then this is never seen or talked about again and it feels like diversity for the sake of “oh look at us we have diversity” which i fucking hate. she’s a woman who fucks well and often and forced moments like that feel forced. sorry.

i do not actively participate in archer “fandom” bc let’s be real there isn’t really one lol HOWEVER the way other fans talk about cyril is fucking bizarre to me. ppl on here act like hes "uwu innocent cinnamon roll baby" when he's just as complicit as everyone else. we know he’s not a very good person from the start and that has been consistent throughout the show. i really don’t have much to say about him here he’s always been a pathetic character (and that voice actor whose name i can never remember is very good at those types, i really like him in what i've seen) and the kinda guy who is always going “but what about meeeee?!” and i think his personality brought a nice balance to the gigantic egos he shared the room with, as he still has a giant ego but he can’t really voice it, and he turns kind of incel-y because of it. i really enjoyed that about him, he was shitty in a different way, y'know? i will say the finale was kind of weird with him, i keep going back and forth on whether or not i like him not really getting a clear ending.

now to talk about cheryl. this has to be one of the most bizarre character story arcs of all time. she goes from a timid secretary who wants to fuck archer to a billionaire with (and i hate this word but i cannot think of a better one atm) psychopathic behavior causing destruction for the sake of causing destruction. she has this really interesting and crazy backstory that we first hear about in season 2 that develops over time, but starting like, season 5/6ish, it’s a slow flanderization of her character from a kind of hidden evil who is smarter than she lets on to a total idiot who likes to set things on fire. and oh! look at that she hears voices sometimes too! haha isn't psychosis funny! aren't people with psychosis terrible and evil? isn't that funny? anyway. this gets SIGNIFICANTLY worse post coma (same with krieger, i’ll get to that later) to basically someone who shouldn’t be outside of a hospital. it was really disappointing and even in the finale a few characters outright say “has she gotten worse?” pointing out in universe the flanderization (or possibly intentional writing?) which just feels shitty. also, her being a country music star for one season and then outright forgetting about it the next (explicitly said in the show she has no memory of it!) is just bad writing.

as for krieger, i feel very much the same way as i do about cheryl. he started off as a weird, kinda background character who turns out to be this mad scientist with ties to malory since childhood. some of his inventions are successful, some aren’t, but he did actually do stuff. as the show went on (post season 4) you also start to notice the degradation of his character like with cheryl, turning him into a bumbling idiot. he got a moment of his old self in the finale which was nice, and the little nod to him and cheryl possibly working together after was fun, but it’s no where near enough to make up for the way they both were treated for the past like 10 years in the show.

as for the man himself, i think he remained the most consistent throughout the show. we see character development, but not a lot, and i think that felt realistic. he’s still an asshole, he’s still a bad person, but he’s not as bad of a person anymore. i think he truly did remain the same character from the pilot to the finale. there were some moments in seasons 12-14 where i felt like he was getting more.. childish? almost? but the finale was him through and through. he always loved lana, he always loved katya, he always loved his daughter. i don’t think lana/archer could ever really be a viable endgame. we’ve seen them try, but they really shine as people, as parents, and as professionals when they have that cat-mouse dynamic and i think it was a good mirror to malory and nikolai from seasons 1/2. another thing, i know he said he didn’t care who his father was, but FUCK i wanted to know! i’m choosing to believe it was nikolai because adam reed had said that at one point that was the plan.

i also just realized i forgot to talk about zara completely. zara felt like, in ds9 when jadzia was killed because her actress had enough of rick berman, but they had one more season to do so they tossed ezri in there for the sake of having someone fill the spot. since malory was gone, lana took her spot, and zara was created to fit lana’s spot. i feel the same way about her as i do ezri dax, which is i really don’t care. sorry LMFAO. i understand why she was there but she didn’t add anything to the show to me.

now the finale itself. the whole “one last mission” thing was nice, it wasn’t mind blowing or anything but it was fine. i will say, i never felt like slater was archer’s real rival, i always felt like (pre coma seasons at least) it was barry. i think the ending of archer vs. barry would have been better but that’s just me. i think they fucked up a little going the route of making them friends in the end. and the whole both katya and barry being in the same cyborg body for some reason felt very weird and last minute, katya and barry didn’t end their relationship on good terms lol. AND THEN. archer having sex with the barry-katya hybrid caught me SO off guard. don’t get me wrong! i’m glad they put that in there but it was very 👁️👄👁️. unexpected to say the least lmfao was nice to confirm his bisexuality though? i guess?

while the finale covered a lot of recurring and repeat characters and storylines, i feel like there were some BIG ones that were left out. like, what the fuck ever happened with veronica dean?? the woman who shot archer, the reason he was in a coma for 3 years?? they mentioned her ONCE in season 11 in an off handed comment that “they were still looking for her”. ok so did they find her?? maybe it’s because i didn’t think the recent seasons were that great, but i thought the finale being centered around a fabian (was that his name? i genuinely don’t remember i’m not watching or reading wikipedia or anything while writing) storyline felt kinda lame too. whenever malory had something going on with a rival agency it felt fun but the whole IIA thing was incredibly boring to me. unfortunately no one could ever compare to malory's character in her terrible diva ways that i could never get enough of. and of course no one could do it besides jessica walter.

another thing is a nod to other early season stuff would have been nice. save for barry and katya, it was all post season 5. like woodhouse. or even a one off line about popeye. what about len trexler. rona thorne? was she ever mentioned again? they were relevant in the early seasons! idk. though i do wonder if we're better off without it, maybe the new writers would have fucked it up too much. the new writers probably don't even know who those characters were fghjfkdsgf. in short i feel like the ending forgot a lot about the beginning, and i think most fans would have enjoyed being reminded of the beginning.

anywayyyyyy this was long and ramble-y and probably incoherent but there we have it. after 14 years there goes my favorite stupid little show of all time. seasons 1-4 i can rewatch infinite times (and i'm not kidding when i say i've watched each episode no less than 30 times either actually fully paying attention or as background noise and somewhat paying attention) and will never get tired of. i enjoy season 5 and some of season 6. from there its a very mixed bag and i find it a little disappointing that a show that started off that strong went out kinda weak. i think i personally would have preferred the show ended after season 5 but i know that is not my choice to make. i don't even think they're (the later seasons) that bad, but they could have been so much better. in terms of adult animation this is still the one. and i don't even think i ever said anything about how much i always loved the art style. in the end, it will continue to hold a special place in my heart and be a shitty comfort show and i'm ok with that <3

#talking to myself #archer #archer fx #there. finally!

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bublegvm · 2 years ago

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#38.5

i think this deserves to be archived under my journal tag too tbh. hence the reason this is 38.5 entry.

it’s christmas but eh i don’t celebrate it anyway i’m making this a new year entry. 2022 was, a year. the tt trend abt jan 2022 me talking to dec 2022 me….. nothing drastically crazy but i got a better job and that itself improved 90% of my depression.

idk if i’m happier, exactly but. coping w impulsive buying just random stuff i want, helped A LOT. lol. this year, i grieved but i also celebrate. i often feel nostalgic on what cld have been achieved with my life. but i also celebrate that i get to experience maturity. they said that your frontal lobe fully developed at 25. that’s, absolutely true. i forgot most things from last yr but i noticed that i had too many random realisations this year, at 26. like, sometimes it doesn’t matter. life is too short for some asinine stuff. but your grievance are never stupid. healing isn’t linear and life moves too fast. it’s okay.

i think this entry is more like a self assurance at this point lol but my reason writing these all out is because, i haven’t had any new year’s resolution in so long but, for 2023, i wanna try being happier. i wanna try actively make it better for me, my mental and physical health both. and step one for that is probably, to “put myself out there more”. ik it’s so fucking cliche but idk, maybe that’ll work? the thing is, i get super fucking lonely so easily. but yet i still decline hangout invitation from my acquaintances. as an introvert i get tired, overwhelmed and overstimulated sooooo easily when i socialise but i also desperately want more friends. making friends as an adult introvert is the hardest thing. especially when people your age has achieved a lot. i understand your life is your own, it’s not a race but that doesn’t make it any less lonelier yknow?

also it’s a given, especially on the linked ramble post but yeah. not a resolution per se, but for 2023 i wish i will find a way to move out of this country. and hopefully live with hannie together, finally.

there’s so much more i wanna say but as always, after a long ramble, every main point just evaporates from my brain lol. just wanna point out how different my dec 21 vs dec 22 post. am i in a better place now? nawtttt so sure about that, honestly! every year i’m like, i for sure hope i wont live to see [my age next year] and if i’m being completely frank, it’s not too different w 27? oh i still wish i wont make it to 27 but yknow, if i do anyway, maybe i’ll try living a more fulling life? i’ve tried this shit since 19 anyway and never succeed so idk, trying a new approach for 27 i guess lol.

anywaysssss. 27 yana, if you’re still here and reading this on dec 23, i hope you’re happier and in a so so soooo much better place. and i hope we’ve learned on how to be gentle to ourselves. see ya. or not lol we’ll see (or not).

#*journal #lol the last entry was on 31st dec 21… what a year!#221226

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lakesbian · 8 months ago

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today is good because there are alec drawing. and alec posts and alec questions in my askbox. it took me a somewhat ridiculous amount of time and someone else pointing it out to me for me to realize that his cape name is a body-jacking joke. Regent, As In Person In Charge While The Rightful Ruler Is Incapacitated. you gotta hand it to him for that one being clever.

the alec bluntness is really something. i no longer agree with much of an older post i wrote abt that scene because it was incorrect with regards to amy's characterization but i think i was correct w my thought wrt alec, which is that he demonstrates a really clear prioritization for, like. not necessarily being honest in general (there are times he lies, and he's not exactly pressed about Integrity), but for bluntly facing up to the realities of things that are awkward, uncomfortable, or upsetting.

when taylor first joins the team, he very consistently frankly answers her questions when no one else will--for example, right after she stuns everyone into silence by suggesting they share power origin stories, alec is the first one to break that silence and frankly explain how triggers work to her. it's in part a clear effort to make her feel included and befriend her, but it's also very specifically about directly acknowledging what other people are sidestepping. in his interlude (which Boy Howdy was one of the things that was his fault, they call him little mr turns into his dad when he's having a bad day on account of how he does that), he says this to sophia:

“You and I are more alike than you’d suspect, I think,” he said. “We’re both arrogant assholes, yeah? Difference is, I admit it, I don’t dress it up and tell myself that I’m a bitch and that that’s a good thing.”

& in the amy arc you mentioned, while everyone else is speaking in awkward euphemism, alec cuts in with "oh, you mean you Mind Raped Her?" with more or less explicit intent to nettle amy.

i think the pattern boils down to a few things:

he's really got an overarching pattern going where more or less his entire life has been deeply, horrifically blood-soaked, where he's been abused to every possible extent, where part of that abuse was being forced to contribute to the same abuse of others, and he's just tired. he's tired and upset by people who can still rationalize or talk in circles or avoid directly looking at the violent and the uncomfortable

he does want to grow into someone other than who his father groomed him to be, and he's self-aware enough to understand that there are a lot of "basic" moral notions that he simply doesn't have a grasp of. deciding to be consistently blunt/honest about difficult topics is likely something that he sees as presumably a consistently respectable thing to do while being simple and straightforward to pull off

abuse is quite often accompanied by the abuser insisting that they're a better person than the victim/issuing deserved punishment for some flaw in the victim and alec 'survivor of every form of abuse ever' vasil's almost proud insistence on admitting that he's being a piece of shit when he's ruining someone's life scans as almost resentful and rejecting of the idea of that behavior

his relationship with aisha is also. it's sooooo very. it's So Very. i've written about them extensively in my tag #alec essays & you might enjoy those posts...it really all boils down to the world's loneliest boy meeting someone else who is also very lonely, and them seeing & understanding each other in a way no one else did, and that being so meaningful for him that he was willing to die for a shot in the dark at protecting the most wonderful person he's ever had in his life. lays down in my puddle of cry

putting microphone in your mouth do you have any overall Thoughts on alec vasil. on his arc any favorite moments any analysis etc

im still formulating my thoughts on the name regent and how the regent is the temporary ruler of a kingdom until whoever is supposed to rule can come into power. What do u think he meant by that.

BESIDES THAT when he immediately called out amy on what she did to victoria i think him being so blunt with what kind of violation happened is so interesting bc he very much is a character that doesnt seem to want to be Vocal in situations like that but him speaking up is like oh yeah. Oh god you are too familiar with that.

hes literally just a little guy and nothing is his fault

AND HIS SACRIFICE UGH everything with him and aisha warmed him up so much to me (beyond the initial “something is interestingly wrong w you boy” impression) like the trust from aisha to let him control her like WHAT!!!! WHAT!!! They make me SICKKK

#DAYS WITHOUT TEARING UP THINKING ABOUT AISHA ALEC: BACK TO 0 #worm spoilers #jay don't look

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jinkicake · 4 years ago

Text

You Call Him Daddy?!

You accidentally call them daddy in front of the team.

Aone Takanobu x Reader

Sawamura Daichi x Reader

For you, sweet Anon! I kinda rambled about Aone,,, uhhhh,,,, I just had so much to say about him! This is my first time writing for him and I had a lot of thoughts.... too many Aone thoughts..... I think his is the longest one I’ve written.... LOL bruh,, I was looking at my other posts and realized I have been spelling ‘accidentally’ wrong every entire time wtffff i-

SMUT

WC- 2,517

~~~

Aone Takanobu

Aone… is a service top,,,,, come on we all know he is

Like you cannot tell me this King wouldn’t treat you right, he is one of the ONLY haikyuu boys I would trust enough to marry

TBH mans doesn’t say shit and he isn’t going to say shit when you call him daddy in front of the team

The team though,,,, shit is going to go down like these mfs are going to combust

You have Futakuchi just standing there speechless with a proud look all over his face as he slowly starts clapping

And sweet Sakunami is like….. ‘did you guys hear sum….”

Ugh there is so much I could say about Aone….. like he would try to be sooo gentle with you just because he is a gentle person,,,, a sweet angel whose only concern is that no one will sit next to him on the train…. HOWEVER, despite as gentle as he tries to be this man still has power. Therefore,,,, you’re gonna get your guts rearranged, isn’t that nice?

Anyway,,,, let’s get into it!!

So basically….. it’s after practice and you’re there talking to Mai while waiting for the mf clowns to hurry up

And of course, Futakuchi wants to keep practicing a little bit so you’re like whatever fine,,,,,, since Aone was staying after too

You don’t really mind too much because Mai decided to stay a little longer as well but as soon as she left you grew tired fast, you had been sitting on the floor against the wall for over 40 minutes and all you want to do is go to sleep

You try to hold your tongue and not be rude because,,,, you don’t want to interrupt your boyfriend’s personal practice but gawwwwd were you bored

Instead, you innocently look around,,,,, innocently, however, your eyes keep going back to the tall blocker…. You glare at him so he notices your anger

Aone does and stares at you with a frown like he can’t figure out what he did wrong,,,,,,, you puff your cheeks out in retaliation

Behind him you see Futakuchi looking at you with a smug expression like 0.0 ,,,,,,, and then Aone looks at him disapprovingly

“What, I was just trying to join in on the conversation,” Futakuchi jokes and slaps Aone’s back before focusing back on the court

You’re like two seconds away from stomping your feet in retaliation,,,,, it’s nearly eight o’clock!!!

So with the anger of a very tired student, you begin walking around and cleaning up the stray balls

You start doing anything to hurry up their practice so you can finally leave with your boyfriend in tow, Sakunami gives you a thankful smile and you feel your irritation slightly diminish

There is something about the first year that you have just come to adore,,,,, not all first years though....

“Yo!” Koganegawa calls and you glance at him, your eyes widen when you notice the volleyball fly past your face. It misses you by a hair

You feel your eye twitch but still, inhale a deep breath to calm yourself down before turning to Futakuchi

“Kenji, when are you guys going to finish practice?” You ask sweetly and the captain looks deep in thought before shrugging

“I don’t know like 40 mins” He responds and you can’t help but whimper and gently stomp your foot, your boyfriend notices your change in attitude and glares at his friend,,,,,, “Fine like 10 minutes” Futakuchi groans and you have to hold yourself back from kissing your boyfriend senseless

That’s how you find yourself in the storage closet minutes later, placing the volleyballs in their respective corners

Aone follows closely behind you, not that you notice, and you nearly scream when you feel his arms wrap around your waist. Your boyfriend curls over your form to rest his chin on your shoulder, gently kissing your skin apologetically….. so he did pick up on the reason for your attitude!

You reach up and ruffle his light hair, giggling when you feel his smile against your neck

“Sorry I was acting so annoyed, I’m just really tired,” You tell him and his arms tighten around you

“That’s okay” Aone mumbles and you nearly melt, it isn’t often that you hear from him but when you do….. it makes you turn into a flustered mess

“I just wanted to go home, daddy” You whisper back quietly,, Aone pulls you flush into his chest and you squeak at the contact

However, when you hear a ball dropping behind you,,,,,,, you glance back in shock at the horrified first year

Sakunami opens his mouth to speak but no words come out, he slowly backs out of the closet and nearly trips when he runs away

“DADDY?!” Koganegawa mimics and Futakuchi pushes him out of the storage closet doors

“What are you talking about-“ He starts but cuts himself off but an impressed gasp when he notices your shocked face,,,, Futakuchi only smiles at his friends back and pretends to wipe a proud tear from his face

“You didn’t hear what you think you did….” You try and cover up but Koganegawa only repeats the word,,,,,, Futakuchi simply shrugs innocently

“I’ll give you your time alone,” He quietly closes the closet door and you sigh at the darkness

“Let me turn on a light-“ You start but Aone pins you to the nearest wall, his hands are gentle on your hips and you gasp at the suddenness of it all

“My love,” He starts and your eyes widen at the heat pooling between your thighs “stay quiet”

“Daddy, please. Please, please, please.” You beg, already taken over by pleasure. Aone continues to slowly thrust into you in a way that leaves you breathless and crying for more. His low grunts ring throughout the room and you whimper when you notice how his biceps flex with every thrust.

Each stroke of his hard cock is so powerful that it nearly sends you into the headboard, you rake your nails along his ribs and tighten around him at the way his abdomen ripples under your touch. “I need more, daddy, please give me more.”

Aone reaches down and rubs away the tears that spilled onto your cheeks with his thumb, he softly cups your cheek and leans down to kiss you. The kiss is a simple peck and you whine when he pulls away, however, your whines don’t last for very long. Your boyfriend picks up the pace and begins to snap his hips into yours, your breasts bounce with every thrust and you can’t help the way your voice shakes.

“Yes, yes, thank you daddy-“ You praise and moans of appreciation leave your lips so frequently, he is ruining you. There is something about the way he moves his hips so skillfully, how he thrusts into you so deeply but still manages to brush against your g-spot every time. It runs you up the wall and you’re so far gone you can barely focus on anything but him.

Aone moves to rest on his forearms, leaning directly on his left side while his right hand reaches down to move your clit back and forth between his large fingers. His movements are slow and cautious, in a very teasing pace to build up the pleasure. Aone always winds you up so tightly before letting you snap, he is so focused on you. You mewl and arch your back, pressing your chest directly in his own, as he begins to rub circles into your clit. You open your mouth to say something but no words come out, that look in your eyes nearly makes his hips stutter and your boyfriend leans down to whisper his command.

“Cum.”

Sawamura Daichi

Let me start off by saying that all the captains have daddy kinks, no I will not be taking criticism

There is not ONE captain who doesn’t exude daddy energy…. I would love to see someone try to prove me wrong~~~ </333

Anyway,,,, Daichi is not called the dad of the team because he is mature and shit,,,,, no that is not the reason

Daichi is the daddy™ of the team, get it right, do I really have to explain this one

Like yessss feed us bitches who have issues with their fathers, yessss where my daddy kink bitches at? We are eating good tonight!

Daichi isn’t my favorite daddy captain, it will always be Ushijima Kita, but lawwwwd he does make me act up

I thought about it for a while,,,,, how Daichi would react to being called daddy in front of his team and honestly,,,,, I don’t really know…..

His team is such a mess that instead of being embarrassed or anything he would have to calm them down because they’re losing their minds like he does not have the time to be embarrassed ya know

Daichi is a soft daddy,,,,, like come on you have a crazy mf like Sugawara and you expect him not to be soft

Tbh I hardcore ship Daichi with that cute girl from the girls’ volleyball team like ugh her crush on him is sooooo cute,,,, idk why that is relevant I just wanted to point out how adorable and sweet they are ….. power couple!!

“He has a daddy kink,” Kiyoko points at the picture with the blonde in a yellow uniform, the two of you are going through the Spring High volleyball magazine

“Didn’t he hit on you one time, lucky bitch” You gasp dramatically and Kiyoko rolls her eyes before flicking your forehead,,,, it is only the two of you in the gym before practice starts

Your once shy friend is laid back and comfortable, out of her shell since it is only the two of you

“Daddy kink” She points to middle blocker daddy!matsukawa from Seijoh and you give her an approving nod

“Daddy kink” You then point to the ace ugh iwaizumi </3 and Kiyoko draws a heart over his face

“Daddy kink, daddy kink, daddy kink,” She begins pointing to numerous members from Seijoh “they all have daddy kinks”

“Somebody is eager,” You playfully flirt and she presses her fingers to your cheek to push you away

“Omg do Karasuno, please I need to know your thoughts!” You beg and flip to your own school’s team, Kiyoko looks at you cautiously before taking a deep breath in

She refuses to speak but points at Asahi and you nod in agreement “I believe so as well” You whisper and she chokes on her laughter

Kiyoko glances at you experimentally and then points at Daichi,,,,, she stares at you and watches as you try to hide your expression

“Well… not that I would know-“ You lie and she pushes your shoulder,, you dramatically stand up in front of her with your hands on your hips “Yes. He does have a daddy kink” and then Kiyoko laughs loudly, covering her mouth as she falls over and wheezes

“Girl fuck you, you expect me to fuck Daichi and not call him daddy?” You ask and she tries to wave you off

“(Y/N), I’m not judging-“ She cries, clutching her sides as you continue to scream random nonsense

“No, I do call Daichi ‘daddy’ and what about it? Tell me you wouldn’t also!” Your voice echos throughout the empty hollow gym and, not to your knowledge, outside the doors as well

Kiyoko continues to laugh loudly, her angelic laughter is something you know the second years would kill to hear, however when she glances at the open doors she immediately closes back up again

She grabs your wrist and pulls you to sit back down beside her, trying to act like you two weren’t just discussing what you call Daichi late at night

Someone clears their throat from the doorway and you glance up to see your boyfriend along with the other third years and a few second years

“H-Hey” your voice cracks and Kiyoko covers her face with the magazine to hide her laughter, her shoulders shake violently beside you “what are you guys up to?” You glance around the gym and try to ignore the silence

“Not much~” Sugawara sings and walks up to you, he grabs the magazine and points at himself before whispering, “daddy” he solidifies the secret with a wink and you burst out laughing

Kiyoko stands up and tries to hide her face into the wall to hide the way she is laughing so hard

“I can’t be here,” You choke and get up, walking past your boyfriend who stares at you with an emotionless expression

You know he heard everything~~

“Daddy,” You giggle as you continue to roll your hips on Daichi’s lap, you let out an exaggerated moan when you feel his cock harden beneath you. Teasingly you bite your bottom lip and flirt with his eyes, continuing to grind against him. Daichi simply ignores you and you move your lips to his neck, trying to get some sort of reaction from him.

You lick at his skin and release a muffled moan when you bite down on his skin. You’re acting so cocky right now, so driven by lust that you’re acting so foolishly in front of your boyfriend.

“Come on, fuck me.” You push your chest into his, purposely rubbing your breasts against him. Daichi leans forward and ghosts his lips over yours, pulling away whenever you get too close.

“Why should I fuck you when you’ve been nothing but naughty?” He asks and you bring your finger up to tap your chin before you laugh softly again.

“Hmm because I asked, daddy.” You lean up on your knees and press your lips to his, Daichi swiftly smacks your ass. His hand stings your flesh and you whimper but can’t help the smile that grows on your face from getting what you want. “Mmm just like that~” You laugh breathily and Daichi positions you down onto his thigh, you mewl at the feeling of his strong muscle pressed underneath you. His hand comes up to wrap around your throat, teasingly he squeezes the sides of your neck and watches the way your eyes cloud up at. “Yes, daddy.”

You try to kiss him once more but you’re unable to move due to the hold he has on you. Daichi continues to bring his hand down and spank you over and over, his slaps are harsh but you happily take them as you feel the liquid pooling between your legs.

“Do you have anything to say for yourself?” Daichi asks and his eyes narrow warningly at you, you pretend you don’t notice. You know he is referring to earlier today.

“I’m sorry, daddy?” You apologize but you can’t help but wonder if you really are sorry or not, you give him another cheeky smile and Daichi slaps your ass once more while cutting off your flow of air.

“You love your punishments, don’t you baby girl?” He asks and you nod eagerly. “I know, god, I’m going to fuck you so good.”

~ Taglist.

@yams046 @why-am-i-sad-and-sleepy @xhanjisungiex @xxashshs @chaosamu @angelkogane @augustdearly @kunimwuah @lovellucy @osamuonigiri

#Aone Takanobu x reader #Daichi Sawamura x reader #aone x reader #daichi x reader #aone smut #daichi smut #haikyuu fic #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu smut

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hintofelation99 · 3 years ago

Note

Hi! I love your posts and want to ask your opinion on something. Who do you think in the batfam has the most and the least common sense of a normal person? If you can, can you also list how they are arranged? Thank you!

Ooohhh, this is a fun one! In my mind all bats lack common sense. Like obviously they're hella smart, after all they are a family of detectives, they just aren't very bright.

Here's a quick rundown (least to most): Tim and Dick tie for first place, both lack common sense in just in completely different ways. Then Damian (mostly cause of the whole 'being raised by league of assassins' thing), Bruce, Cass (controversial ik), Steph, Jason, Duke, Babs, and last on the list is obvs Alfred. (Kate is probs between Cass and Steph, but I've only really seen her in the DCAMU and need to get to know her better).

And Ima add a 'keep reading' cause this is gonna get long.

Tim:

Tim is one of the smartest in the family. He deduced Batman's identity as a child, majorly fucked up the League of Assassins, and has been honored (I say this v sarcastically just btw) with Ra's creepy obsession. He's smart, plain and simple. However, when it comes to just day to day survival and being loved, goddamn that boy is dumb.

He regularly mixes energy drinks and coffee. Sometimes he even mixes energy drinks, alcohol, and coffee.

In his mind warnings are optional. "Tim, did you just sniff that drano?" "Yeah, why?" "IT LITERALLY SAYS DO NOT SMELL" "Oops"

He regularly tests shit on himself. "Why is Tim on the floor?" "He mixed joker venom and fear gas to see what would happen" "HE WHAT"

Also if you try to compliment him or tell him you love him he will find a way to misunderstand. "Tim, I love you and you are an amazing son." "I don't know who this Tim is but he sounds great" "It- it's you, literally you. Timothy Jackson Drake." "I'm a bit confused, I didn't know you knew two Timothy Jackson Drakes. You should really introduce us."

Dick:

Dick in many ways is a total himbo. He's a complete sweetheart, super supportive, and very ditzy. His ditzy-ness directly correlates to how relaxed he is. Chilling in the manor? Peak himbo. A mission in space? Absolute genius and amazing leader. Just took down a bunch of thugs? Slowly reverting into dopey boi. He always has the ability to be super analytical, smart, and big brain, but he likes being whimsical and even airheaded. And that's not a bad thing, it's just him taking mental breaks, being lighthearted.

"YOU PUT DIESEL IN YOUR CAR?" "...Yeah, in my defense the nozzles look basically the same" "They're different colors?! Also the diesel nozzle doesn't even fit into your gas tank, how did you get it in?" "I'm a good pourer."

He always responds to the word dick and it always confuses him. "God Ra's is such a dick!" "What?" "Ra's is a dick" "I'm not Ra's!" "Wha- no! I mean penis dick!" "Ohhhh, yeah he is a penis dick"

Once Dick is safe he reverts into himbo pretty quickly, even after stressful situations. "Hey Wally?" "Yes babe?" "I forgot how to change my lock screen again" "Dick, you just hacked into an alien spaceship not even an hour ago??" "What's that have to do with anything?"

Damian:

Damian lacks common sense from growing up with the League of Assassins. He's an amazing warrior and super analytical but casual human interaction alludes him. He is getting better though, so eventually he'll be lower on the list than Steph. But for now he's a senseless bby.

The first time someone tried to give him high five he assumed it was an attack and flipped them. Same with a fist bump.

This is complete canon but his original treatment of Alfred, his brothers, and, well, everyone. Like bby boy please read the room.

His ego can easily override common sense. Like he wouldn't jump off a bridge if everyone else was doing it, but if someone said he couldn't he'd immediately swan dive off that bridge.

Bruce:

For the world's greatest detective he can be a major dumb bitch sometimes. Some of it's growing up rich and some is being so wrapped up in his 'crusade for justice' that he just misses basic shit.

One time he walked in on Roy and Jason making out, the next day he saw them cuddling, then they mentioned moving in together. It took him three months to realize that they're dating.

He doesn't understand coupons, like at all. Jason has tried to explain them but Bruce just gets even more confused.

Bruce tried to make coffee once. He literally just poured coffee beans in water and microwaved it. He was surprised when it didn't taste good.

Cass:

Cass is similar to Damian in she lacks common sense from an unconventional upbringing. However she's learning way faster than Damian and depending on where in the timeline you're looking she might have more common sense than Babs.

Basic things like lines, turn taking, and speaking when spoken to aren't innate to her. Like, she knows and understands them, but often forgets about them.

There are many times that she blurs the line between civilian and vigilante because she'll do something that looks v stupid and dangerous for a civilian. The thing is she never notices when she does this.

One time she was in a restaurant and there was a cockroach on the wall across the room (cause Gotham) and instead of getting up and killing it like a normal person she threw her steak knife and impaled it.

Steph:

Steph is probably lacks common sense the most conventional yet slightly concerning way. She lacks common sense in the same way a cartoon character or sitcom character would. Like it's sorta realistic but at the same time damn bby girl why are you such a disaster??

She will do anything on a dare. Anything. There is a rule against daring Steph to do things while in the manor or on patrol.

Every time she hears someone say Red Robin she yells yum. This has gotten both her and RR shot.

Steph is v lucky that 1) she's a badass and 2) the batfam loves her because she annoys absolutely everyone just for shits and giggles and the only reason she hasn't been murdered is that Cass scares everyone.

Jason:

All common sense is lost when dramas at stake. Say what you will but Jason is the (second) biggest drama queen in the family. Also he, like most bats, lacks a sense of self preservation which leads to shit common sense.

He tried to steal Batman's tires.

Sometimes he listens to music during patrol and tries to hit people/shoot on beat. This has lead to stab wounds.

Jason loves to loudly quote classic literature while on stake outs. This is a problem for obvious reasons.

Duke:

Ok this is around the time you get to average common sense levels. But he still runs around Gotham beating people up in tights (or kevlar) so he doesn't get full points. Also he's still not Babs level common sense. One area Duke lacks common sense in is how to deal with the Batfam (which is v understandable tbh)

One time Duke was joking around with Jason and decided to steal a roll off of Damian's plate. This ended in blood.

Other than lacking Batfam common sense, most of his poor judgement moments are less notable but still concerning.

For example the time he challenged Dick to a hot dog eating contest then went on a roller coaster.

Babs:

Other than being a vigilante Babs almost has normal human common sense. However being a vigilante has negative side effects on ones common sense.

While Babs' sleep schedule isn't as bad as Tim's it's not a whole lot better. She's stayed up 72 consecutive hours multiple times.

She has accidentally poured coffee onto her computer instead of into a coffee mug.

One time she drank an entire gallon of milk before realizing it was a month expired.

Alfred:

Most assume that working for Bruce Wayne is a sign of him lacking common sense. But nah, it's him knowing, understanding, and challenging his own limits. Also it's him being a charitable human being. Like he has enough common sense to go around and tbh it's the only thing keeping the family alive.

"Master Bruce, you may not use Elmer's Glue All to close a wound."

"Master Dick I would encourage you not to teach Master Duke acrobatics on the glass coffee table."

"Miss Stephanie I would not advise trying to consume an entire jar of peanut butter in one sitting, and no, I do not care if Master Jason dared you to."

Tada, there's the list! Sorry that was probably a lot longer than anyone wanted, but I enjoy talking about how ditzy the batfam is. Like they're all geniuses but at the same time they're just sooooo dumb.

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makeste · 4 years ago

Note

I was originally going to send this message declaring my undying love for your metas and chapter reviews aND THEN - AND THEN MAKESTE - I READ THE ANSWER WHERE YOU SAID YOU WERE ARO AND THAT MAKES ME SOOOOO HAPPY. I'm aroace and it is SO FRUSTRATING to want to consume platonic or familial interaction between people and CONSTANTLY only get romantic or sexual. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING YOU CONTRIBUTE

woooo up top! solidarity lol.

for me it’s like... I don’t know if “frustrating” is the word I would use, but I do wish there was more gen out there. and that’s also something I’ve felt awkward about wanting in the past, because my early fandom years took place in a time where slash was much less of an everyday commonplace thing than it is now, and liking it was still a fairly controversial thing. the internet was a much more openly homophobic place than it is now. like, picture the purity police of modern day tumblr, but if they attacked any kind of non-heterosexual relationship as being sick and perverted and wrong. that was pretty much the general vibe. this was before AO3, and people who wrote slash often didn’t post it on ff.net and only posted it to their own private blogs and/or locked and moderated communities instead just so they wouldn’t be harassed. and there was absolutely no canon representation out there at all, or next to none. it was very much a “[rolls eyes] oh the yaoi fangirls are at it again” sort of thing where non-cishet relationships in fiction and fanfiction were at best not taken seriously at all, and at worst were treated with outright scorn and disgust.

and so like, with this being a common attitude at the time, I felt guilty for not always wanting to read slash myself. like, I don’t mind reading about romantic relationships at all, but for me there also has to be some other kind of element in play as well, or else it’s just not going to click for me. if a fic is just romance, just a lot of pining and slow burn stuff without anything else really going on in the plot, I just get bored and disinterested. I almost want to use the word tired, even though I’m not sure that makes much sense. I just can’t connect to the emotions, and so I disengage pretty quickly. and so I tend to steer clear of time-honored fandom staples like coffee shop AUs or And They Were Roommates, just because for me there’s rarely anything there for me to latch onto. I like angst, but I can’t relate to “so and so doesn’t feel the same way about me”, or “I want to be with them so bad but I don’t know how to confess”, or “they’re with someone else and it hurts like crazy every time I see them and know we can’t be together”, because none of those are emotions that I have ever personally felt, and I just can’t make myself feel them. what I can relate to are things like “this person makes me feel safe”, or “I feel a strong connection to this person”, or “I trust this person more than anyone else” because those feelings aren’t exclusively romantic in nature. I can relate to closeness and caring and love and affection and trust, but what I can’t relate to is the feeling of having a single person occupy all of your thoughts all the time, and very badly wanting to be the most important thing in their life as well, and feeling incomplete otherwise.

but anyway I spiraled away from the point I was trying to get to, which is that for a long time I actually felt guilty about feeling this way. because even though it’s rare to find fanworks where gen/platonic relationships are at the center, actual canon is chock full of said relationships. and so it’s like, what right do I even have to complain when I get to read all the time about so and so being friends, but the people who actually want them to be in a relationship in the actual canon so rarely get to see that actually happen. because that much has not changed in the past 20 years, even though society has become far more accepting of LGBTQ+ relationships. most canons are still far more likely to tease a non-hetero ship -- on purpose, even, hence why queerbaiting is a thing -- than actually commit to it. and so I often feel like I have no right to voice my desire for more genfic, because genfic has never faced the same kind of scrutiny as slashfic. gen has always been acceptable, and there is plenty of canon representation of platonic and non-romantic relationships, and so it’s not something I have any business whining about.

and even now I feel fairly uncomfortable voicing this lol. I write almost exclusively genfic myself, and up until very recently, I’ve always defined gen in my head as being just a lack of romantic or sexual content, rather than being its own distinct category. I think that’s one of the reasons it took me so long to realize I was aro (that, and I’d honestly never even come across the term until just a few years ago). for me, my lack of interest in romantic affection always felt more like a lack of identity rather than an identity in and of itself. I always felt like I was missing something. and for a very long time it never occurred to me that this might be a permanent thing; I just figured, okay, I just haven’t had this feeling yet. it just hasn’t happened for me yet. but eventually it would, and I just hadn’t met the right person, or whatever. but it was never anything I particularly wanted, and I never felt like I was missing out on anything by not having it. I never felt any kind of longing for it or felt incomplete without it. I was actually perfectly content!

but because society treats romantic orientation as the norm and places such a huge emphasis on it, I still had the uncomfortable feeling in the back of my head that if I never fell in love with someone and never wound up having a relationship with someone, my life would somehow be less meaningful and whole. like, we’re raised to think that romantic love is basically the pinnacle of the human experience, the purest and truest emotion that anyone can feel. and at the same time, there’s this idea that a life without that kind of love is just sad and unfulfilling and tragic. and so for a very long time my experience with my own aromanticism was characterized by me thinking of it as a lack of something that everyone else said was very important. and it took a long time to realize that that wasn’t the case, and that it was a valid orientation all its own and not just a matter of me being deficient in some way. and that was actually such a relief to finally come to terms with. I can be whole and complete on my own and still have a rich and fulfilling human experience even if I never experience romantic love, and that’s fine. I’m not missing anything. I’m not wrong for feeling like I’m not missing anything. it’s fine to be content with just me as I am. like, holy shit. and that was such a weight off my shoulders to finally get that.

I once wrote a fic which I was and still am very proud of. it was a genfic, and it had a really intricate plot with a big twist at the very end. and there was a ton of emotion in it, and it got very intense at times, because these were two characters who cared a lot about each other and would literally die for each other if they had to, and I’d put them in a situation where that possibility was very much looming over their heads at every turn. and I really put everything I had into trying to convey that kind of bond as strongly as possible. like I poured a ton of my heart and soul into that fic. and the responses were almost universally positive and kind and made me really happy.

there was one response though, that still sticks with me to this day. it was by and large very positive, just like the others. but it ended with a single sentence that, at the time, kind of just lowkey gutted me. Not gonna lie though, would have loved some slash in there.

like, that just cut me. way more than this person actually intended, I think. I’m pretty sure they just meant it as an offhanded comment, not even a concrit or anything. just “haha would have loved it if they’d kissed though lol.” but it stung. because this was something I’d put every ounce of emotion that I could conjure up into. and even though it wasn’t mean to be hurtful in any way, to me that comment read as “this is still missing something.” because there was no romance, the fic was incomplete. the characters’ feelings were incomplete. even though I’d struggled so much to convey all of these complex emotions which to me were so real and powerful, and even though the comment even acknowledged that I had by and large done so effectively, to me the single takeaway that stuck was that the feelings were less meaningful because there was no romance.

and that felt like a failing on my part. I even apologized for it. and here we are, ten years later, and that comment still pops up in my head any time I feel the urge to talk about a popular ship which I support but which I also enjoy as just a friendship. “just” a friendship. I still feel guilt over that. I still feel this urge to overexplain that I’m not trying to invalidate the actual romantic ship. I worry that I’d be perceived as ungrateful and/or a bad ally if I ever just came out and said “I wish there was more gen” like you were able to say so freely, anon. I worry about people getting offended if I were to say “I headcanon so and so as being aroace” because it might be viewed as an attack on their ships, or as latent homophobia, or something. like I have this paranoid fear that people might take it as me being puritanical and all “oh no, icky sex” or whatever, and so I end up just never bringing it up at all.

and that’s the thing about aromanticism, though; it’s so easy to just never talk about it at all, because for so many people it is just defined as a lack of something, rather than a something all on its own. it’s so easy for it to be something you just never bring up, and which just kind of quietly exists as the boring, bland, inoffensive yet uninteresting lack of a relationship; the default blank slate that most everyone is dying to fill in as soon as possible, except for you. and I’ve gone on thinking about it that way myself for so long that I’m still struggling now to sort out how to embrace it as an actual identity. it’s something I still have a lot of work to do on I guess.

anyway! so that all got very long and rambling and personal, far more so than I intended; clearly I have a lot of pent up thoughts and feelings about this lol. I guess I probably could stand to talk about it more, since the evidence would indicate that I clearly want to. but eh, baby steps. but anyways you are super valid anon and thank you so much for the love and comments. <3

#aromanticism #meta #aromanticism in fandom #personal #long post #ask #anon ask #hey um just an addendum this is a pro aroace post NOT an anti-shipping post #just to make that clear #like you can be for one thing without bashing the other #so if you want to reblog this that is awesome and I'm grateful #but please don't use it as a launching pad for any weird toxic 'shipping is bad' takes please and thanks

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lexilucacia · 4 years ago

Note

Hi, can you write something where Chase is in a stable and healthy relationship with a girl/guy from outside of work and one day they make him lunch with cute notes inside and house finds it and then mocks him before the team ( original or the rest) and Chase goes I'm happy and that's what matters and then he goes home and proposes because he knows his partner is all he wants in life. Pls pls pls i just want him to be happy.

This prompt really spoke to me, so I’m sooooo sorry to everyone else’s I haven’t written yet, but when inspiration strikes, it just does!

Title: Little notes For Chase

Words: 3031

Tags: Marriage Proposal ×Weddings ×Fluff ×House Being House ×Secret Relationship ×Love Letters ×(or notes really) ×love notes ×thats not a tag ×Love Confessions ×Cross-Posted on Tumblr ×Tumblr Prompt ×Teasing ×Happy Ending ×Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts ×Author Is Sleep Deprived ×I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping ×POV Robert Chase ×

Pairings: Robert Chase/OMC

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29378082

Chase smiled again at the little note that his partner had slipped inside his lunch bag. They never failed to make him smile from the ones that had long extravagant messages to the small ‘I love u!’s that often made an appearance on a busy morning. He can’t really remember how it started, he thinks it must have been a late night where Chase was a bit too tired to pack his own bag (and that made him sound like a school kid). So, Felix had packed food for him, sending him off to work with a kiss and a ‘I love you’.

He had seen the yellow postie flutter to the ground, catching in his grip recognising it as one of his partner’s lucky posties with ducks in the corners. The little message had caught him off guard, he’d expected his boyfriend’s weird rambles that he left around the house accidentally packed in his bag, but instead it was a little smiley face and a love heart. The note read, ‘don’t forget that you are loved (especially by me)’ with little hat drawn onto the printed cartoon duck.

He clutched the note to his chest, pinning it up in his locker once his lunch break was over. They didn’t speak of it, but at night, after Chase had thought Felix was asleep he pressed a soft kiss to his nape, and squeezed him a little tighter.

The notes had become a constant in his life, he was used to finding one sitting one behind the toothpaste holder, one in the cabinet next to a new box of his favourite cereal and occasionally in his textbooks when he was studying for requalifications. He still found notes in his lunchbox, his favourite sitting next to a picture of him and his beloved. This one in particular read ‘I know I don’t have to woo you my love, you’d never leave me. But if you did, let’s just say I know an abandoned warehouse, you’re with me for the long haul.’

Chase had almost cried at that one and had wanted to pull out the wedding ring he’d put in the back of his cupboard a few months prior, that very night. Felix’s warped, wacky and weird sense of humour was the reason Chase loved him so much. He nevertheless stopped himself, unable to forgive himself if Felix didn’t get the proposal he deserved, goddamnit.

They’d talked about marriage a lot, but neither had popped the question and Chase wanted to make the day that he did perfect (if Felix didn’t beat him to it at this rate). He was falling more in love with the man and his endearing notes, not that he’d thought it was possible and most days he thought his heart might burst with love. He’d be concerned if he wasn’t a doctor and working at a hospital.

Felix always seemed to know what to say. Reminders of love and worth came on days where he couldn’t his dad’s words out of his head, notes of memories and date nights came when Chase was feeling nostalgic, and his favourite every day the assurance of love. He never knew how to repay Felix, what to do for him, so he settled on small things, things that often would come up in the notes.

He’d notice that Felix was running out of clean socks and the next day all of Felix’s socks would be lined up, folded and washed (even if he’d had a night shift), prompting the drawing of tiny socks on his next note. Or Chase unloading the dishwasher, or putting Felix’s books away when he fell asleep with them on his chest.

Both of them savoured these small things, tokens of their love, their bliss and domesticity. It all seemed to be going well, until one day Chase was careless. His boss House had all but ordered a team lunch, so there was no way out with his dignity (or secrets as it may be).

Lunch started out normal, or normal as it could be with House and his nosey (pining in one case) colleagues, Cameron and Foreman, so he should have expected this. Chase pulled out his lunch bag, ignoring the snickering from House about how gay it looked and set to work digging through to see what food Felix had packed today. Inside it held a vegemite sandwich, a few pieces of chopped up fruit, juice box and a small lamington they’d purchased earlier in the week.

It honestly looked like a school lunch, House teasing him as such as he ignored his definitely flaming cheeks and certainly beet red ears. He was almost (not really) pleased to see the lack of a note perching in his bag, until something yellow fluttered past his eye, reminding him of the first day. Before he could smile goofily at the memory and snatch up his note, a loud sound rang out in the cafeteria.

The yellow disappeared under a familiar stump of wood, that Chase was used to hearing click down the halls of PPTH. The man had surprisingly quick reflexes (only when it embarrassed Chase of course) and the paper made a loud sound as it slid along the floor to House’s foot. The thrum of his heart beat and the scraping of the paper was all he could hear as the cafeteria noise was muffled around him.

The older man picked up the note, capturing the attention of a few tables around them and the new people sitting at their table. House scrunched his eyes at the note, crinkling his nose in distaste at contents and reading it disdainfully.

“3 years i’ve put up with your ugly mug and you still haven’t learnt to fold shirts properly. Date night doesn’t sound so fun now.” The note had a crudely, pencil drawn shirt on the duck, making Chase smile as he looked over House’s shoulder.

Ho honestly didn’t know whether to sob or laugh, settling for a strange mixture of both, smile wide and tears running down his face, so that the rest of the cafeteria was staring at him, if they hadn’t been before.

It was their 3 year anniversary, Felix had remembered the conversation they’d had on their first date, he had never been more in love with the man. He must have zoned back, because when he finally snapped back to snatch the note from a gaping House’s hand, he was being barraged with questions.

“3 years?”

“Why didn’t we know?”

“Who is she?”

“What’s the crying for?”

“How could you have kept this a secret?”

“Is she hot?”

“I thought you slept with everyone?”

“What about the nurses?”

Chase was already getting a headache, not in the mood for this and wanting to sneak off and call Felix, just to rant about his day or blubber about his love, whatever came out first. He put a hand out, effectively silencing everyone. He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “What do you want to know?”

Before they could all start shouting again he sighed. “One at a time.”

“Who is she? Why didn’t we know? How long Chase?” Chase had to coach his face into a neutral expression not to blow up at Cameron, the woman had made it no secret of her crush on him.

He simply raised an eyebrow, on an otherwise poker face. “His name is Felix. 3 years and I am under no obligation to share my personal life. There is a reason it’s my private life.” He glared.

Cameron looked shocked, before apologising for being rude and Chase felt a little guilty, but not enough to apologise in front of hundreds of prying eyes. He turned to Foreman who looked like he was bursting for a question.

“He?” Was all Foreman could get out, voice squeaky.

“He is the love of my life. Any more questions?”

“Knew you were too pretty to be straight.” House smirked, taking a bite into the younger man’s sandwich before spitting it out.

“Did you try to poison me?” He shrieked.

It was Chase’s turn to smirk, picking up the offending sandwich and taking a large bite out of the other side. “I hope my boyfriend wasn’t trying to do so, it would have been me.” He exclaimed with mock horror.

He munched on the sandwich ignoring the taunts coming his way from House and walked back to his locker to put away his lunch bag and postie. Unfortunately House, Foreman and Cameron had deigned it necessary to walk him to his locker. After failed attempts to get them to walk away he opened his locker, smiling at the bright yellow notes and pictures of the two of them.

The photos detailed their story, their first date and Chase could almost feel it, smell it, taste it. Their hands damp with nervous sweat, uncomfortable suits and awkward conversation at a fancy Italian restaurant that had ended with them shucking off their ties, undoing their top buttons, kicking off their shoes and running in the rain. There was a cute, but blurry before and after photo of their date that Chase had insisted on printing for their anniversary.

The rest of the images showed dates at DisneyLand, kisses under the mistletoe, birthdays and anniversaries spent together, hell there was even a picture of a half asleep Felix, shirtless and covered by a white sheet, Chase had taken one morning when the sun was just right and he looked like an angel in disguise.

The post it notes took up all his locker door, some half hanging off, some stuck with blue tac, others with sticky tape and the special ones hung on a piece of string with some old pegs. It was truly an altar for his love, his life and he couldn’t be happier. Tucked behind it was an old picture of a shirtless blonde, teen, smiling widely on the beach, arm around a similar looking but younger girl, also grinning. They were holding matching surfboards and both were dripping wet from the surf, clutching ice blocks.

Chase treasured the photo of him and his sister, but Felix took up the most space, like he did in Chase’s life. He’d bounded in and never left, from the day he’d run into him on a train and spilt coffee on him (what a cliche), while running late for one of House’s crazy ideas. Felix had filled the hole in his life that Chase hadn’t realised he’d had, life always filled with colour and joy and weirdness, with love and a warmth he’d never felt before. For once he was content, no matter what he could hear the others muttering behind him.

Foreman didn’t leave him alone the rest of the day, every time they went to do lab samples, nudging him and asking about his sex life. Cameron was more discreet but she too wanted to know everything, it wasn’t unusual behaviour for either, but it had never really been directed at him, making it disconcerting.

House however, was acting much the same, always having teased him about the nurses, only changing the pronouns he used and adding more gay jabs than usual. It didn’t bother Chase for some reason today, maybe it was because he was too excited to see Felix, see what they were for their 3rd year anniversary, Felix had said he’d wanted to plan it this year.

As he was leaving the hospital, he was met with wolf whistles and an eyebrow raise from Cuddy (of course House had gone to her). Wilson also gave him a soft smile as he left, wishing him the next of luck Chase supposed, while House had pelted him with comments about his sex life and ‘taking it up the arse’ as he left. He didn’t care, he was floating on a cloud.

He had to stop himself from speeding home, knowing it was dangerous and Felix would definitely scold him for it, besides he didn’t want to go back to PPTH tonight. After what felt like forever he pulled up outside his house and didn’t bother waiting before he grabbed his bag, rushing up the stairs. What he saw when he entered was not what he expected, but endeared him regardless.

Felix seemed to be juggling six pots, pans and bowls, food spilled on the counter and the faint smell of burning was what greeted him at the door. “Felix, my love?”

He called as he walked in, hanging up his coat and shucking off his shoes, going up behind his boyfriend and wrapping his hands around the smaller man’s waist. “What is this?”

Felix set everything down on the counter, turning around to give Chase a kiss and looking severely put out.

“Robbie,” he whined. “It was supposed to be a surprise, and good, and be fantastic and awesome and it didn’t happen.”

He was pouting and giving Robbie puppy dog eyes and it felt so good to come home and be Robbie, himself, not Chase, like his father. He hummed at his partner, swaying with him and ignoring the half-hearted flails and whines to go back to the cooking.

“How about we get some take out and we’ll clean this up in the morning?” He asked, distracting the man with kisses along his freckles and pulling him impossibly closer, flushed to his hips.

Felix looked like he wanted to argue before moaning into the kiss and pulling Robbie closer. “Okay.”

They made their way over to the couch, Felix lying in Robbie’s arms while they argued over what to watch and whether Hannibal or Will was cuter. All in all it felt domestic, it felt like home. He was warm and comfortable, his brain to mouth filter had gone by now. A few too many drinks and shared thoughts about getting railed by Hannibal ensured it, but even he didn’t think he’d be this stupid.

He opened his mouth and without thinking too much about it he asked, “Will you marry me Felix?”

Felix bolted upright, jostling a sleepy Robbie who had Felix lying on top of him and was running his fingers through the smaller man’s hair, the key word being was.

“Are you serious?” Felix asked, wide eyed. He looked on the verge of tears, but the smile on his face betrayed his emotions in a second.

It took a moment for Chase to realise what he’d said, jerking himself awake. “Yeah.” He finally breathed out, suddenly breaking into a grin.

“Yeah.” Before either of them can stop it, they’re breaking out into hysterical laughter, is this what being in love is like? Chase has never felt anything as close, he wants to feel it for the rest of his life.

“Yeah?” Chase smiles, jumping up and running to their room. He runs back out in record time, narrowly missing the coffee table and getting down on one knee just in time to see Felix sprint out of the kitchen. He opens the box up, showing the reasonable sized rock he’d gotten Felix, hoping to god that he’d like it. Felix took one look at the ring before bursting out into tears.

“Will you be my husband?” Chase asked, smiling sheepishly. “I know it’s not a grand proposal and we just had take out and it’s on our-”

Felix shut him up with a kiss which definitely distracted Chase, then opened his own box. “As long as you’ll be mine.”

The ring Felix has chosen is beautiful, there’s no other way to describe it. It is so perfectly them. On the inside the engraving reads ‘for my silly duck’, the outside a rose gold and encrusted with tiny diamonds. Chase let out a wet sob, sliding Felix’s ring onto his hand. The inscription on his reads ‘for my post-it note hero’ and he cannot wait to spend the rest of his life with this man.

They don’t do much for the rest of the night, as the excitement and nervous energy runs down they sit examining their rings, half watching the tv and both fall asleep on the couch. They both wake up a little too late, but Felix doesn’t have to go into work until midday so he packs Chase’s lunch and sends him off to work with a kiss and a goodbye to his fiance.

God it still made them both giddy. The team noticed as Chase walked in, earlier than usual with a spring in his step, Foreman making a crude comment about getting laid and Cameron just smiling awkwardly, obviously agreeing with Foreman’s assessment but unable to say it.

“So who asked?” House asked, walking in the room and glancing at Chase's inconspicuously hidden hand, that neither fellow had noticed.

“It was a joint effort.” He smiled giddily just thinking of the night before as House made gagging sounds and the other two congratulated him. He got a thump on the back from Foreman, an awkward hug from Cameron, an even more awkward bout of advice from Wilson and a happy congratulations from Cuddy. Word spread around the hospital like wildfire, but he didn’t care.

He was getting married. He had a fiance.

He pulled out his lunch, sitting alone at a table, wanting to see what Felix had packed him. As expected a little note flew out of the bag and landed on the table in front of him, it all seemed to be going his way.

‘To my duckling, my darling fiance’, it read, Chase’s heart skipped a beat at the word, ‘I love you with all my butt. I would say my heart, but it is just not as big.’

He laughed at his boyfriend’s crude sense of humor and big gluteus maximus Felix had given the duck in pencil, placing the note in his locker right next to the photo of their first date. The next photo to go up would be a photo of them at town hall, too excited to wait, along with a photo from their first dance and the traditional cake fight.

He couldn’t be happier, with what Felix called them his ‘Little Notes For Robbie’.

#robert chase x omc #robert chase #house md #proposals #marriage #fluff #everything is beautiful #fanfic #house fanfic #love letters #dumb sense of humour #wrote this instead of sleeping #lexi's fanfic #lexi's writing #greg house

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floraisann · 4 years ago

Text

eighteen

➣ ateez 9th member au

➣ warnings: a couple of curse words because jinju + yeosang = chaos

➣ genre: honestly idk since yongju starts all in His Feels™ then because ateez it gradually dissolves into chaos sooooo maybe angstxcrack??? 🤠

➣ word count: 2,317 words (how did i even accomplish this 😳)

➣ summary: it’s yongju’s birthday!! though the question is... who’s gonna tell the others?

➣ main masterlist

➣ yongju’s masterlist 🐉

➣ author’s note: i’m aware that it’s approaching noon on the 29th in korea as i’m posting this, but where i am, it’s still the 28th, meaning it’s still a valid time to post this. so anyways, happy birthday to my firstborn mr. lim yongju 🥺😭 he is my BABIE and i can’t wait until i can actually develop his character further sdkfnvsijn

❅♩♬♩❅――

“I'm tired of the city, scream if you're with me If I'm gonna die, let's die somewhere pretty, ah”

It wasn’t that Yongju’s mindless singing was a rare, unwelcome occurrence in the dorms— in fact, the ATEEZ members had grown so accustomed to the sound of his voice that the halls felt empty in the few hours where both Jongho and their new maknae were silent. Rather the thing that was making the members uncomfortable was the lyrics leaving their youngest’s lips as well as his tone.

Homesickness. The cold, empty feeling in your chest as you long for a home that is no longer yours. That’s what it was. That’s what Yongju was feeling, singing as to distract from the sentiment.

A sigh leaves Yongju’s lips as he pauses the track halfway through the first verse, the raindrops against the window somehow only working to magnify the desolate misery in the pit of his stomach. It wasn’t the first birthday he’d spent away from his family (SM hadn’t exactly allowed him to travel back for the special occasion in those thirty months spent hoping for debut with his SMRookies friends), and of course, his relatives had all sent him countless birthday wishes earlier on in the day, but it was still the first birthday he’d spent completely away from any family.

Lim Jinju. His annoying twin sister who, as the title implied, shared birthdays with him. Every year prior to the present one, even if they couldn’t celebrate with their families, at least they had each other. Perhaps her absence was just what was making him feel so miserable. Yongju couldn’t call himself outgoing by any means— often disappearing from others’ eyes hours at a time in order to recharge his rapidly depleting social battery— but it was always in the presence of such… chaotic figures that he felt able to let go.

“Do the members even know my birthday…?” He whispers, his words disappearing within the confines of the dark, empty dorm room. Wooyoung and Yeosang along with several more of the members had left for the company building to get some additional practice hours in to prepare for some upcoming schedules. The only members that stayed with him at the dorms were Seonghwa and Jongho, both of whom were unfortunately injured.

Tired, Yongju let himself flop onto his side, the headboard loudly clicking against the wall before rocking to a stop. “What am I so tired for…?” He mumbles to himself, squinting at the sudden brightness of his phone as he unlocks it. “I haven’t even done anything today.” His thumb hovers over the ‘call’ button for a few seconds as he considers calling home. The thought soon leaves him once more as he groans, shifting onto his back.

“Ah, my head hurts.”

Sleep quickly finds the young boy, its grip firm against him as he’s forced to succumb to his drowsiness. It’s restless, but still, it’s much needed. For the first time in days, Yongju can stop thinking.

♩♪♫♬⇝

“I think he might like the vanilla cake.” Hongjoong softly mutters to San, who stands hunched over, carefully inspecting the contents of the store’s bakery counter to find the perfect treat for their later celebration.

San gently shakes his head, not tearing his eyes from the iced treats as he replies to his elder in a semi-hushed voice. “Vanilla? No that’s too basic even if he is kinda plain. I vote chocolate.”

“Vanilla is basic and chocolate isn’t?” Wooyoung scoffs. “Chocolate is probably the most basic cake flavor to ever come into existence.”

“Everyone shut up, let’s get him carrot cake.”

The members all turn to Mingi, incredulous looks on their faces as they question his words.

Wooyoung is the first to explode. “You absolute HEATHEN do you want him to think we hate him?”

“I was just making a suggestion!—”

“—Wait guys!” Yeosang’s call quickly breaks the chaos as his bandmates turn, not wanting to speak over him. “I have—” He stops himself to laugh into his sweater-covered palm. “—Guys, I got Jinju’s number. Should I ask what kind of cake he’d want?”

The expressions on his members’ faces quickly shift from incredulous to exasperated and Yeosang finds that he can only laugh, giggling as he scrolls to his phone contacts to find ‘Lim Jinju’

“Yeosang,” Yunho finally begins. “You’re telling me that this whole time we were arguing, including the entire car ride to this place—” He stops, closing his eyes as he presses his fingers against his temples. “You had contact with Jinju?”

The accused blonde simply flashes a toothy grin as he extends his arm to show off the newly added contact in his phone. “Okay—” He quickly retracts, looking down at the said contact. “I’m being completely honest here— I actually forgot I had her contact since I just got it last night and entirely by chance too!”

Wooyoung blinks. “Yeosang, what you mean, sir?”

Grinning, Yeosang quickly locks his phone, clapping his hand over the screen as he launches into his story. “Okay! So you know how Yongju always falls asleep while on his phone, right? Yeah! So last night after I showered, I came back to the room and he was asleep, probably on accident too, because the episode of ‘Free!’ he was watching was only half finished.”

“Where are you going with this?” San interjects, Hongjoong quickly shushing him.

“Okay, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, when I was walking past him, I noticed his phone was on like, maybe two percent battery? So being a good roommate, I decided to charge it for him. So when I grabbed his phone, I had the sudden realization that since it was unlocked, the options available to me were endless! So in the end, I both charged his phone and saved Jinju’s number to my contacts for safekeeping.”

“Has anyone ever told you that you suck at ending stories?” Wooyoung flatly questions. Yeosang is quick to glare through his blonde locks, eliciting a few laughs from the other members.

“Well either way, that safekeeping purpose ended up being fulfilled much earlier than expected, so if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be calling Miss Lim Jinju!”

Before anyone can react, Yeosang’s phone is unlocked, and the familiar ‘calling’ chime rings in their ears.

“Put her on speaker!” Hongjoong instructs, and Yeosang is quick to comply.

“Hello?” Jinju’s strong and clear voice reverberates around them after the third ring, and there’s a momentary bout of chaos as all six men present attempt to greet her at the same time.

“Happy birthday, Jinju!” Wooyoung hollers directly into the speaker.

“What are you all so loud for?” She whines. “I swear you just gave me hearing loss— anyways, I hope I’m not the first twin you’re screaming at because last time I checked, the other June twenty-eight born lad literally lives with you.”

“Well, that’s kinda why we called, you June twenty-eight born lass, you know?” Yunho weakly sings into the speaker, causing a few odd glances from the shop’s workers.

“What could you— Oh!” Yeosang flinches, pushing the phone further away from his face as Jinju yells. “Wait I know exactly why you called! Okay, so be very mindful of Yongju’s taste buds because they’re kinda fucked, and he hates chocolate cake.”

“See! I told you!” Mingi hollers, Wooyoung being quick to slap him across the back of his head as he quips a fast, “You didn’t tell us shit, mr. carrot cake!” back.

“Stop fighting!” Hongjoong scolds, lightly punching Mingi on the shoulder. “Anyways, Jinju, if he doesn’t like chocolate, what should we buy him?”

There’s a brief silence as the twin contemplates her answer, the six members present leaning close to the phone as they make their own guesses as to what Yongju would like. “I’m pretty sure the last time we had cake he really liked the red velvet.”

The members immediately disperse, different degrees of self-disappointment on their faces, save Yeosang, who had begun to softly sing the chorus of ‘Red Flavor’ by Red Velvet.

“Why is it that no one guessed red velvet, yet one of us idiots managed to come up with the idea that Yongju would want carrot cake?” Wooyoung finally asks.

“It’s because we’re all clowns,” San starts, turning away as Hongjoong goes to purchase the small red velvet cake. “And Yongju just so happens to be the circus director.”

❅♩♬♩❅――

“Yongju, wake up!” The boy in question blinks awake, disoriented, as Seonghwa gently shakes him conscious. “Sorry we couldn’t let you keep sleeping, but the managers want you, Jongho, and me over to the company for some last minute evaluation… thing,” He explains.

Yongju sleepily yawns into his hand, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes as he asks, “What time is it now?”

“It’s 3pm,” His elder quickly answers. “They want me there earlier so I’m heading off now, but the managers are gonna bring you and Jongho over in an hour or so.” He then smiles, lovingly pinching the youngest on the cheek. “Freshen yourself up before then, alright? I’ll see you soon.”

As Seonghwa leaves, Yongju forces himself into a sitting position, dazed, yet trying his hardest to force himself fully awake. Finally, he kicks his legs over the side of his bed, padding straight over to the bathroom to put on some makeup. He was an idol now. He had to at least try to look alive.

♩♪♫♬⇝

“Guys, hurry up! Jongho and Yongju are gonna be here any minute now!” San whines, rocking on his heels.

Seonghwa immediately stops his work in arranging streamers on the wall to glare at the younger boy, who in response, flashes him a wide grin. “If you’re so concerned about us not finishing in time, you could help, yeah?” He rolls his eyes. “I’m literally injured and I’m doing more than you.”

“I’m the supervisor!” He happily sings. “I’m here to make sure you guys are doing your work the right way!”

“What time is it anyways?” Hongjoong quietly mutters. “How much time do we got until they get here?”

“It is,” Yunho begins in a sing-song voice. “It is exactly 4pm at this moment.”

The boys all turn back to Seonghwa as a small choking noise leaves his throat. “Why didn’t you say anything? Jongho told me he’d get Yongju here by four o’clock sharp!”

“Yeah, and I have some news.” Yeosang announces, glancing down at his phone as he calls all the attention to himself. “Jongho just texted the old group chat saying they’re getting out of the car now.”

“I told you this would happen!” Seonghwa yells, all of the balloons they had purchased for the event in his hand as he runs to place them. “This is why I asked all of you to keep track of the time!”

♩♪♫♬⇝

“Do you know what we’re filming?” Yongju softly asks Jongho as they approach the practice room. “Are we filming a dance practice for ‘On’?”

Jongho lets a puff of air escape his lips as he shrugs at the question. “They probably wouldn’t have brought me or Seonghwa here if that were the case since we didn’t even dance in that stage.”

“Good point,” Yongju comments, nodding. “But is there anything else we could film? There was nothing in the schedule for today either.”

Jongho simply shakes his head once more. “I really don’t have the slightest clue.”

The pair stops as they reach the practice room, and for once Yongju notices the lack of light coming through the semi-transparent door.

“Are you sure this is the right room?” He asks his bandmate, frowning as he steps into the pitch black expanse. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen the main practice area this dark…”

“Well, the managers told me—”

He’s cut off as the lights flash on and the other seven members’ faces are exposed.

“Happy birthday, maknae!” Wooyoung screams, his high tone easily slicing its way through the babble of the others as they begin singing him a happy birthday.

He can’t help but take a few steps back, his hands flying to his mouth as his eyes fill with tears of… happiness? surprise?

“Why are you running away?” Jongho asks, his hand still draped across the younger’s shoulder as he pushes him closer to the cake.

He smiles, standing somewhat awkwardly as Yeosang places the cake in his arms and he tries his best not to drop it, eyes lighting up as he notices the cake’s color.

They all applaud, urging him to quickly make a wish so he could blow out the candle and enjoy the treat.

Well, what did he want to wish for?

His life situation had taken a drastic turn in the last nine months. It wasn’t just that his thirty four month trainee period had finally drawn to a close. Finally, Yongju had friends, or rather eight brothers and countless fans who he was beginning to truly feel comfortable enough to be completely himself in front of without fear of judgement. And on top of that, he was able to get this far without giving up anything he loved.

He made it. For the first time in the nine months Yongju had spent with ATEEZ, he could finally feel the full effects of the word ‘success’.

He wants it to last.

The members all happily cheer as he blows out the candle, and he flinches away from San’s aggressive shows of affection. Despite the secondhand embarrassment he should be feeling first and foremost as the eight of them act— well— so wholeheartedly themselves, he’s distracted by the warmth he feels in his stomach as well as a sudden burst of energy as he finds he wants to mess around just as he would with Jinju back home.

Yongju debuted. Yongju had a family. Yongju had success.

#ateez #atzinc #kpopuniversenet #ateez 9th member #ateez reactions #ateez headcanons #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez writing #ateez hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #ateez yunho #ateez yeosang #ateez san #ateez mingi #ateez wooyoung #ateez jongho #ateez yongju

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avaantares · 5 years ago

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Imma rant for a minute. (This is me being critical of a thing, so if you’re eschewing negativity right now, feel free to scroll on past.) :)

Sooooo I took a break from replaying FFVII:R tonight (last night, by the time this posts) to watch the stream of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Love Never Dies, a show I already knew to be terrible (but hey, you can't argue with free musicals, right?). Long before the musical opened, I’d read The Phantom of Manhattan, the book it’s based on, and that was... like... Hmm. Think of a bad fanfiction you've read. I mean a really bad one, one that gets every single character wrong, has the stupidest of stupid fiction tropes, includes ridiculously contrived scenarios to kill off characters and weird medical "science" and historical inaccuracies and a totally implausible plot, all mashed together just to reinforce someone's OTP which was kind of an unhealthy relationship to begin with and got considerably more unhealthy in this story, AND it includes a lengthy author’s note in which the writer bashes the author of the original work his story is based on and explains everything that author did wrong and how it should have been written, using examples from the fic writer’s own work to demonstrate.*

Then picture that as a $24.99 hardback.

So I knew the general story already, and I'd seen a couple of clips from the stage show, and from what I remembered it was all pretty forgettable. But like I said, free to watch, right? Nothing to lose but a couple of hours.

Oh. My. Goodness. I was not prepared for the full experience. It's like Phantom of the Opera and Cats had a (secret) baby that got shoved in a blender with all of circa-2004 Fanfiction.net and then pasted back together by a YA fiction editor’s intern. Despite a truly exceptional cast and some strong visual and set design, it wavered between cringe-y and I’m-going-to-hurt-myself-laughing levels of bad.

Mind you, it’s still better than the book, in which (SPOILER ALERT if anyone cares, which you probably don’t because if you’re the type of fan who would, you’ve probably already seen the show) Christine’s son is not the byproduct of a willing affair she had with Erik after she became disillusioned with her marriage, but was conceived after he kidnapped her at the Opera House, and... let’s just say consent was dubious, at best. (IIRC she was “half swooning” and not entirely aware of what was happening.) Also there’s some nonsense about Raoul being impotent from a war wound and never having consummated their marriage... But broadly speaking, the story is the same as the musical -- by which I mean it completely negates everything good and symbolic and meaningful about ALW’s Phantom of the Opera, to which the book was as much a sequel as it was to the original Gaston Leroux novella.

Love Never Dies fails as a sequel for a number of reasons: Every character you liked in the original? Assassinated. Raoul, who was willing to sacrifice his life for Christine in POTO, is now an abusive, alcoholic wastrel who has gambled his family into crippling debt. Christine cheats on her husband with a guy who has made a habit of kidnapping and threatening her, and who has actually murdered a number of people. Meg, Christine’s dearest friend and confidante, is now a washed-up burlesque dancer who -- again, SPOILER ALERT -- tries to kill first Christine’s son, then herself, then finally succeeds in killing Christine. The broadest take-home message of POTO, that kindness and love can heal even the deepest wounds, is undercut by these dramatic character reversals. Even the show’s title anthem “Love Never Dies” is contradicted by the love triangle at the center of the plot. Maybe love never dies, but that doesn’t stop Christine from cheating on her husband, Raoul from walking out on his wife and son, Erik from threatening to kill Christine’s child if she doesn’t do what he wants, Meg from betraying and murdering her best friend... yeah, let’s not take relationship advice from this group.

But beyond that, LND is just bad structurally. The Phantom’s opening number builds up to be a “Music of the Night”-style anthem -- a dubious choice, since it makes everything he sings for the next half an act feel flat by comparison. Then we go into a surreal Coney Island segment for a while, then a bunch of really awkward dialogue exposition gets crammed in, and then twenty minutes into the show we finally meet Christine and her family, which kicks off the actual plot. The pacing is uneven. The tone is all over the map, too, bouncing between Phantom-like operatic ballads and Jesus Christ Superstar-esque carnival rock numbers. (All of which, I have to say, the Melbourne cast knocked out of the park. The vocal performances were definitely not a weak spot in this production.)

While I really like a lot of Andrew Lloyd Webber's stuff -- I've seen a number of his shows on stage, some of them three or four times -- his titles seem to be hit-or-miss. For every Phantom, there's a Whistle Down the Wind. Some of that isn't his fault; a mediocre lyricist or book writer can do a lot of damage, even with good music. This musical had two lyricists and four writers, and it shows. But IMO, this is also not Lloyd Webber’s best work. Apart from the title song, which I’ve heard often enough to know it outside of the show, I can recall the melodies of... two songs? The score isn’t bad, it’s just not as instantly memorable as Sunset Boulevard or Joseph or Phantom. And a weak story plus average music doesn’t equal a great show.

I’m sure I’ve complained more than anyone cares to read, but I have one final rant about something that caused me to startle my dog by making some very screechy noises: When Christine arrives by ship, the Phantom sends a horseless carriage to pick her up at the pier. Mind you, this scene is specifically stated to take place in New York in 1905. The crowd of onlookers is utterly SHOCKED by a vehicle that moves by itself. “There are no horses!” someone exclaims. "How does it work?"

Apparently all four of the credited writers slept through history class, and also couldn’t be bothered to Google a photo of New York at the turn of the century. Automobiles have been around since the 1880s, and by 1905, New York had so many cars on the streets that the New York Supreme Court had to hand down a ruling guaranteeing that horse-drawn transportation still had the same right-of-way as motorized vehicles, because the motorists didn’t want to share the road. Heck, my own great-grandfather owned a car by 1895! Glaring, easily-avoided errors like this jar me so far out of the story -- even good stories, which this one wasn’t -- that they actually bother me more than other, more significant failings. At least do your basic research, people. Use Google. Grrr.

Anyway, I’m just rambling now because I can’t sleep and I'm on prescription narcotics for pain and my dog is tired of listening to me grumble. Don’t mind me; I’m not actually this negative in real life. 😅

----------------------------------------------------

* I am not exaggerating. In the foreword, author Frederick Forsyth bashes Gaston Leroux and gives examples from his own works to explain how Le Fantôme de l'Opéra could have been written better. Like. DUDE. NO.

That book went straight into the donation box the moment I was done reading it. When Love Never Dies came out, I briefly regretted getting rid of it, but then I remembered how bad the story was and stopped feeling bad.

#Love Never Dies #andrew lloyd webber #phantom of the opera #musicals #Review #insomnia writes #long post

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yourholidaymom · 4 years ago

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Your Holiday Mom: Mama Ro

I am SO excited to have you with us for the holidays. We celebrate anything and everything here at the House of Creative Mayhem. You’ll be joining me, Ro, a purple-haired mama, and two of my three kids. Connor is 20, spends a lot of time playing video games, and is absolutely hilarious. He is on the autism spectrum, and sees things a little differently than everybody else, which makes him a wonderful person to know. He says if you like to game, you can play Team Fortress 2 with him, but if you don’t want to talk, he understands. My middle child, Ron, (24) is gender queer, and will be bringing their partner, Greg to dinner. They’re both gamers, too. And vegans,, which means I have to get creative with my cooking. I still make turkey, but I get creative with the side dishes and make a field roast for them, which is a vegan thing made from mushrooms and stuff. My oldest son lives in a nearby city with my granddaughter, but they are busy and probably won’t be able to make it. Could be a surprise visit, though, so prepare to hang out with a four-year-old. She and I will probably put on our matching tutus that I made for us. If you want one, I’ll make one for you, too. Or not. Your choice, of course.

I hope you love dogs, because I have a rescue pit bull named Lord Jasper Bighead, Earl of Fartsalot. I’ve had him for about 2 and a half years now, and he’s the love of my life. Nobody knows where he came from or how old he is, but this is his home for life now. I take him with me everywhere I can. Dogs are good company. They just give out love, and take as much love as you give them. And believe me, I can give a LOT of love. He also loves food. I’ll give you treats to give him and he will adore you.

So my birthday is right before the winter Solstice, and we’ll celebrate that with me taking everyone out to dinner. We’ll have to figure out someplace that has food we all love. I am wondering about your favorite foods and how to make sure you get them. Let’s sit in front of the fire and talk about it. While we talk, I’ll make art. I create weird things out of stuff other people throw away. Sometimes I call myself the Queen of the Trash Fairies. I also take in people who have no where to go, like my friend Chuck, who has been homeless for decades. He camps in my yard now, so criminals and homeless sweeps can’t disrupt his life. And of course I will be inviting all kinds of friends over for dinners throughout the winter months. It’s fun to gather in the warmth and light of home when it’s cold and rainy outside, isn’t it?

I’m really hoping you will spend some time making art with me. I have a gazillion different supplies. I’ve got paints, collage stuff, sharpies, jewelry-making supplies, clay, several guitars (I write protest songs, among other things. I’m what you’d call a social justice warrior and I will never understand why some people consider that an insult. Silly.) and of course, lots of journals and pens, because I’m also a writer. So, you know, whatever you like to do creatively, I bet we can do a lot of it while you’re here.

Can we have a serious talk about something? Being the parent of two queer kids, and being queer myself, I know full well how hard it can be. I spent a loooooot of years trying to fit in and be like everybody else. (news flash, it didn’t work!) Now that I’m older, I don’t even try to hide who I am, and I have found SO many people who love me exactly as I am. My friends celebrate my weirdness, which includes a love of puns, wearing dresses (never pants, ever), studying sword fighting, building an art studio in my yard that is made out of tires, custom painting my shoes… the people I know LOVE these things about me. And they love me even when my depression and anxiety keep me from being in contact very often. They just love **me,** exactly as I am, and exactly as I am not. I am sure that if you haven’t found your people yet, that you will. Just keep shining your bright self and the right people will come to you. Like me and my family. We’re your people! You’re our people. Isn’t that glorious?

Oh, I forgot to mention the house… I ilve in a pink house. The inside is painted just about every color you can imagine. There’s not a beige wall anywhere, so I hope you’re ready to experience a lot of color, because that is exactly what we have here!

What do you want to do while you’re here? We can play games. I have a bunch of fun ones, Cards Against Humanity, of course, Pictionary, Scattergories, the kind of games that rely on thinking outside the box. Or even thinking like you never believed there was a box to begin with! Or we can go for a walk with the dog at the lake nearby. Or we can go downtown and check out the holiday decorations. They have a lot of brass bands and carolers. We could join in the carols if you want. (I will want to, guaranteed. I love to sing. I’m not very good, but I have fun. Of course, I wouldn’t insist that you do anything you don’t want to) Oh, that has me thinking about popcorn. I don’t know why. I want popcorn with tons of butter, while we’re in front of the fire talking. You get to pick the music. I wonder what we’ll listen to first. I bet you’ll introduce me to things I’ve never heard before, too, won’t you?

Listen to me, you precious, wonderful being… I love you and I am so glad you’re here with us. You make everything more fun,more meaningful. This is the best year ever, because you’re here. Now, what do you want to do first?

Love your face, Mama Ro

PS OMG, I completely forgot about baking. There will be sooooo much baking. What’s your favorite cookie? Do you want to learn to bake bread? Make pies?

PSS This silly picture of me is my Halloween costume, Steampunk Peacock. What should I be next year?

** This year we are reprising your favorite letters. The original post date of this letter was Dec 08, 2019.

Your Holiday Mom: Mama Ro was originally published on Your Holiday Mom

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miss-pearlescent · 5 years ago

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my experience at a Super M concert :)

Y’all I saw Super M in Vancouver this Thursday and my eyes and ears were BLESSED! IDK how to describe it, but Kai is even more Kai in person. Like his dancing is 100x harder than what you see on screen, and his proportions...OMG HIS PROPORTIONS. I used to think his Jopping outfit did him dirty but seeing it in real life...WOW HIS LEGS ARE SO LONG BUT HIS TORSO BALANCES EVERYTHING OUT PERFECTLY. Like when I see Ten or Taeyong, I’m like “damn they are pretty skinny” and Lucas is like BUILT for a kpop boy, but Kai is like peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerfectly inbetween!!!! I could not take my eyes off of him during the group numbers (except during times like when Taeyong was grinding on the floor during No Manners fkjaldhalfjds) because he’s just soooo beautiful and his movements are sooooo expressive and purposeful and I just CAN’T.

I have been a Kai stan since 2012 and missed the chance to see the EXO concert in New Jersey so I had to make it to Super M. No regrets travelling across the country for it :’) I just wish he had more performance time LOL everyone had a solo stage but his was at the veryyyyy end and you can kinda see that he’s a little bored lol or maybe I’m just projecting LOL Also omgggg his solo (side note: CONFESSION SHOOK ME UP EVEN THOUGH I BARELY WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE BECAUSE the choreo is kinda boring ngl) is at the end and then he has to run and change to do No Manners and then get all cute for With You AND HE LOOKED SOOOO TIRED. He kept doing that thing where he has his hands on his knees (me when my anemia catches up to me lol) when the other members aren’t looking BUT THEY NOTICED and I think they were a little worried but they couldn’t show it so they just kept patting him on the back. Like right when With You began, Kai stands between Mark and Lucas and they’re both like “o_o u ok?” and he just waves it off and i’m like “OMG HE’S NOT OK” from across the stadium LOOOL He kept trying to be cute for the number, but he still hadn’t recovered even for the commentary section after ;__; he had asked backstage for a water but nobody noticed djkalhgdkalfjdskl I’m so sad.

Then he took a towel/napkin from the front of the stage and started wiping down his shirt with it and I forgot about being sad lol

ANYWAY they had to perform Jopping right after that and I was genuinely worried because he looked soooooo tired but he still went hard during Jopping. Like....I was shocked LOL He was so fine LMAO.

I would love to post videos of my commentary during the concert because they’re hilarious but it’s just me going “OMG WOW WOW WOOOOOW OMG AHHHH WOW HE’S SO HOT WHAT THE FUUUUCK”

OK about the other members:

Ten is literally an anime boy! They drew his eyebrows soooooo sharply for the show and during his solo, he literally looked like a hot anime villain like wOW. And his dancing!!!! He’s soooo strong but flow-y and everything looks easy but difficult at the same time LOL he was the member that often diverted my attention away from Kai because sometimes Ten would do some next level shit and my brain’s like “WHAT was that.”

Taeyong....he’s the sweetest thing omg He did a hard rap solo stage and then comes out and says shit like “Vancouver, you are so beautiful...like Mark!...You are so hot...like Mark!” He’s PRECIOUS with his English. He tries soooo hard and I feel like all he wants to do is make people happy ;__; i wuv him

Mark IS HILARIOUSLY AWKWARD. And he just runs with it! Sometimes he’ll make accidental innuendos with his words (he wouldn’t stop talking about how much time he and the members spent in a ~spa~ like bitch he LOVED that spa) and when he realizes he’s being awkward, he just tapers off his sentences and hopes nobody realizes but THE WHOLE STADIUM REALIZES and it doesn’t matter that he’s speaking in Korean because his members all know when he’s said something awkward LOL my whole son.

Lucas WOW LUCAS IS WHAT I ASPIRE TO BE IF I WERE A BOY. He’s really goodlooking (as we all know) but he’s just soooo funny with the shit that he does. I’m sure there are fancams of his solo stage (Go Boom??) online but I had never watched them and I was SHOCKED by how fun it was. I loooove that he doesn’t go for the sexy or hard concept because he’s sooooooo fun and cute and entertaining when he’s just being himself T____T Please go watch his solo stage online and cry at the video playing behind him. He’s SOOO cute.

Taemin..............Taemin taemin teaalfdklah WHAT THE FUCK. SHINee was what got me into kpop when they came out with ring ding dong and I fell in looooooooooooove with Jonghyun and his blond hair lol But Taemin!?!?! What?!?!?! So the concert starts off with I Can’t Stand the Rain and then Taemin does his solos.......that’s like almost 15min straight dancing/singing HARD. And then they do a bit of talking and his voice is so different! Like I knew it was different but hearing it in real life?!! wow

MY BOY BAEKHYUN I LOVE HIM WOW. I thought they would lipsync a bunch of their songs because hello it’s tiring af BUT BYUN BAEKHYUN SHOCKED ME WHEN HE DID HIS HIGH NOTES AND YOU COULD SEE HIS VEINS ON THE SCREEN JFKALHGKLSJFKDLS And he’s sooooo cute and cheesy and his voice during UN Village omggggggggggggggggg I’m soooo glad I got to hear it live ;____; I’m just a little sad that nobody really does fanchants around here other than singing along to the song because when there are those silent beats during UN Village, nobody did “BAEK-HYUN-NIE” and it just felt awkward to me and I was so sad screaming it by myself LOL

ANYWAY the show was a short 1.5hrs where we stood the ENTIRE TIME even though we all had seats -_- Jopping came on in the beginning as the background to an intro vid and everyone was shook so we all stood up...AND THEN NOBODY SAT BACK DOWN FOR THE ENTIRETY OF THE SHOW LOOOL The boys are soooooo energetic and I can’t believe they do this every two days while hopping on and off a bunch of planes/buses (they bussed to vancouver from seattle T_T) Watching them honestly makes me fear that they’re going to collapse after every set because THAT’S HOW I FEEL LOL

The concert was such an amazing experience and I hope everyone loves these boys forever and ever because they deserve it T____T

#super m #nobody asked for this but I love talking about Kai LOOOL #as well as other cute boys :3

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battlestar-royco · 5 years ago

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let’s talk about tropes

here’s a little (little?!) post on tropes, as promised!

some tropes i hate and why i hate them

love triangles: this one’s pretty simple and obvious. love triangles are unrealistic and toxic. they romanticize emotional cheating, and they cause nasty ship wars in fandoms, especially when two of the points in the triangle are women. often, the “losing” point of the triangle is a one-dimensional throwaway character who either gets killed off or accepts their fate and steps back for the “winner” to take over. this dynamic can get especially problematic when the “loser” is a woc and the “winner” is white, when the “loser” is an lgbtq+ character, and/or when the “loser” has no purpose other than to create drama for two other fleshed out characters. the character often ends up being hated for bad writing and “getting in the way” of the endgame ship. yikes. the only valid resolution to love triangles, imo, is a polyamorous relationship!!!

girl hate: it’s rare to see nice friendships and romances between women, and often this trope is used to drive an unnecessary wedge between two female characters who would have otherwise been great friends. i don’t mind when two women/girls are in conflict with one another for an interesting reason, but i absolutely hate when the conflict is based on something stereotypical and boring. the “girl hate” conflict is always based on something misogynistic, unrealistic, and/or stupid--like a man, looks, sexual practices, or a contrived competition. this is especially gross when the men in the story act as the voices of reason in the conflict, patronizing the women and teaching them how to be nice and use logic.

“strong female characters”: many writers mistake “strong” characters for characters who employ violence, sassiness, and masculine attributes to get what they want. I’m so over it. all I want is nuanced representation of women that doesn’t reduce them to a love interest or a sex object who looks down on other women. strength comes in many forms, and everyone defines it and identifies with it differently.

miscommunication: this has to be one of the laziest forms of prolonging drama, when two characters are fighting because of something that could easily be solved if they were locked in a room together for five minutes.

incest/incest-adjacent romances: this should go without saying, but we’re for some god-awful reason going through a period where incestuous relationships/fake-outs (ie, you’re in love with him? too bad he’s your brother. oh wait, it’s revealed that he’s not!/you two are blood related but you either never met or you went through a period of separation, so that means you can fall in love) are heavily romanticized or used to create extra drama, and it’s just unnecessary and not cute. i think authors use this to add some sort of edge or uniqueness to their writing, but it’s just so toxic and a complete turn-off for me.

aesthetic oppression: (term inspired by and similar to “aesthetic conflict,” thanks kat) when an author throws in some sort of oppression that is experienced by people in real life, but they either don’t address the oppression thoroughly or they only use it to add some sort of edge to their story and further a character’s romance, death, redemption arc, etc. for example, the homophobia in GOT season 6, which reduced loras to a walking stereotype of a gay man before he was subjugated by the church sept and blown up, and the patriarchy in ACOTAR that only exists to show how feminist rhysand is.

boys/men fighting, having tantrums, or expressing themselves through violence: it’s fine for male characters to fight every once in a while, but i just hate that this seems to be exclusively employed with male characters and it is used as a solution or reaction to problems when realistically, men are much more nuanced. men cry. they might be alone or in front of others. they might cry into their pillow or on a friend’s shoulder. fictional men add violence and anger to their sadness because the authors don’t want to emasculate them, but that’s a stupid goal and crying doesn’t affect someone’s gender. smashing your belongings when you are upset is unhealthy and potentially dangerous, and so is physically fighting others over trivial or patriarchal issues (ie a woman) when conversation could be/is probably much more compelling and effective. it’s important to show men that anger isn’t always the first emotion to feel under duress and that they don’t have to express their feelings by punching walls or throwing their belongings across the room. (also?! practically? YOU’RE RUINING YOUR OWN FUCKING STUFF AND/OR YOUR ROOMMATE/FRIEND/PARTNER’S STUFF, YOU ASSHOLE.)

sexy immortals: immortality can be used in clever and entertaining ways, but i feel like a lot of the immortals i’ve been seeing lately run in the same vein as the twilight vampires, which is to say: unearthly beautiful (aka conventionally attractive), overly sexy (aka stalking a love interest for the sake of “attraction”), apparently 16-25 years old (aka accessible to grown women who read/write ya).

uninvolved parents or non-existent guardian figures: sometimes young characters don’t have parents and that’s fine; some of my favorite books are about characters with one parent or no parents. but i still feel like we’re coming out of a period where it was very popular to kill off the parents (especially moms) at the beginning or before the story starts. i really want to see more exploration of characters with parents, or at least see the characters without parents make significant relationships with adults or react appropriately to the loss of their parents.

one-off character deaths: when a character enters one chapter or episode of a book/show just to immediately die for cheap emotional manipulation. this character is also sooooo often a marginalized person, and it’s super predictable and tired. try harder, author/screenwriter!

some tropes i love and why i love them

special snowflake/chosen one: I can’t explain it. I know it’s so cliche and one of the most hated ones out there, but I love when this trope is done right. I’m not a big fan of the chosen ones who have a special destiny, especially if the mc is a white boy, because that’s been done a million times before. but I’m a sucker for that one character who comes upon an unexpected special ability/object/creature or connection to a force of good/evil/nature and has to contend with that. They’ve been Chosen and they’re completely unprepared, and it’s gonna change their life trajectory and relationships and maybe even political climate.

woobies!!!: I feel like this trope is so underrated and it’s one of my favorites of all time. I absolutely love rooting for that one character who’s too good for any of the shit they’ve been through and Deserves Better^TM, but they manage to survive and grow against all odds.

found family: i love that authors are expanding the concept of family and unconventional narratives about love. the found family trope is so charming and relatable to many readers, and it’s great to see seemingly contrary characters come together to find a loving home together that isn’t necessarily romantic.

soft characters: it’s rare (though increasingly less rare, fortunately) to find soft boys, aka male characters who are compassionate, funny, kind, pensive, and/or quiet instead of brash, loud, violent, and angry. i know so many boys and men who fall all along the spectrum of masculinity, and it would be great to see more characters who represent that, especially because male characters are typically forced to express their masculinity in one way. i also absolutely love seeing women being equally as soft and kind--with the exception of ASOIAF!sansa, i feel like this kind of character has been cast aside for the sassy, rebellious, empowered^TM female character who isn’t like other girls and wields a bunch of weapons. i’d really like to see more female characters whose strengths come from empathy, intelligence, and emotion.

unique relationships within a friend group/ensemble: this one is marginally related to my love of found families. not only do i really like tight, strong friend groups, but i also like when each of the friends within that group has a different and compelling dynamic (hostile, romantic, friendly, tragic, whatever may have you) that can carry a scene or an arc. unique relationships between all the characters in an ensemble adds so much dimensionality to a story.

complex guardian figures: this mostly applies to ya, but i think it can also be said for many adult books and tv shows. adult characters often get flattened or sidelined for romance or action plots when in reality almost everyone has parent/guardian relationships, and these relationships are the source of so much complexity. that complexity may mean love, found family, anger, patronization, manipulation, and more, and all these things will be expressed differently based on the characters in question. for example, look at the difference between eleven and hopper from stranger things and harry and dumbledore from harry potter. hopper and dumbledore are so different and each of them carry darkness and baggage that comes out on the kids for better and worse. bonus points if the guardian is a woman, because these types of relationships between girls and women are relatively rare to the ones between boys and men.

anti-heroes/anti-villains: i think this is another one that goes without explaining. we’re all the hero of our own story, after all. if an author can successfully convince me to root for a character who i know is wrong but believes they’re in the right, or for a character who does the wrong things for the right reasons, there’s a good chance that i think very highly of that author.

stoic, bitter, angry characters: if there’s one character in the ensemble who has any of these traits, there’s a good chance they’ll be my favorite, especially if that character is a woman. usually this character’s journey is about what makes them vulnerable and how they become close with the most unlikely companions or form a special relationship with a foil character. it makes the audience feel like we’re being let in on a secret, specifically about that character.

and that’s about it! my inbox is always open to talk more in depth about any of these and more, so let me know. thanks so much for 700, you all are great :D

#maxine talks tropes

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sirenfromthelostcity · 5 years ago

Text

The One Where The Reader Finds Out

A/N: Sooooo sorry this took so long to post but it’s finally done! I was actually kinda struggling with this request a bit bc I couldn’t see Jack as a pinning type of guy (he’s just so frickin smooth and handsome how come ppl aren’t throwing themselves at him??) but this was actually really fun to write once i got stuff in order. It’s kinda modeled after this episode of Friends (The One Where Ross Finds Out) so you’ll see some similarities if you’ve seen the show. This is my first ever Jack Traven imagine so i really hope i got his character right or at the very least you guys kinda enjoy it. Feedback is always appreciated but now I leave you to it! <3333

Words: 4.2k

Jack Traven can be described as many things. His fellow colleagues at the LAPD often use words such as reckless, bold, and dauntless to describe their fellow comrade. His close friend and supervisor Harry would call him straight up crazy but also very intuitive and clever. As for you, his best friend, you would say that Jack Traven is nothing short of compassionate, valiant, and brilliant. For the most part, all of these descriptions of Jack do not fall short of his actual disposition. But what would best describe him in his current situation is painfully conscious of how painfully oblivious he has been.

It has been nearly two months since Jack had the brilliant idea to go on a double date with you, your current boyfriend Ian, and his then girlfriend Scarlett. Although you weren’t initially too fond of the idea he meant no harm by it. All he wanted to do was meet the new man in your life and judge if he was good enough to be with his best friend. His vigilant nature is something you’ve always admired about him and it is because of this that you agreed to the double date.

“So,” Ian turned forward in his seat to face Jack now that you and Scarlett have excused yourselves to the ladies' room, “you’re the infamous Jack Traven, (Y/N)’s mentioned you a lot and to be honest, I was a little intimidated by you.”

“Don’t sweat it, man, (Y/N) likes you a lot, I can tell.”

“I sure hope so,” he sheepishly smiled. “So you two are childhood friends?”

“Yeah, I’ve known her for most of my life. We met when we were kids through mutual friends, we lost touch after high school but reconnected when I joined the force a few years ago and found her in the forensics team.”

“And the bond has been restrengthening ever since, huh?”

“Yes it definitely has,” Jack chuckled briefly before taking on a more serious demeanor. “Listen, Ian, (Y/N) is really important to me. She is an amazing, smart, beautiful, and extremely down to earth woman who doesn’t deserve to have her heart broken.”

“Don’t worry Jack, I know I’d be a fool to not recognize (Y/N)’s worth. I know we haven’t been together for long but I really care for her.”

“I’m glad to hear it. It would be a real shame if I have to kick your ass,” he joked.

He remembers laughing and even toasting in your honor with Ian that night shortly after that conversation. He remembers the great food, good service, and the exuberant vibes of the restaurant. For the most part, everything was going great that night. Then he saw Ian wrap an arm around your shoulder, effectively bringing you in closer to him, and stirring feelings of unease deep within Jack. At that moment, Jack mentally reasoned with himself that he was simply being protective of you. However, he wasn’t able to conjure another sound explanation for why he’d feel a tug at his heart strings whenever he’d catch you smile at Ian or interlock your hands with his.

Jack rubs at his temples, recalling the night of your double date and mentally kicking himself for not reacting to his own signs sooner.

“Sir,” the waiter calls out to Jack, pulling him out of his reverie. “Are you ready to order or would you prefer to give your party some more time to arrive?”

Jack pensively casts his eyes on the empty seat opposite of him, a seat reserved for an already late blind date Harry had arranged for him due to being tired of seeing Jack “all mopey and sad about (Y/N).”

“Y’know,” he sucks at his teeth, “if I’m gonna eat alone tonight I’m gonna do it right. I’ll have the steak with steamed potatoes, a side of mac and cheese, and a beer. You guys have that here right?”

“Yes we do, sir. Which one would you like?”

“Surprise me,” Jack hands his menu to the waiter and the waiter disappears into the kitchen to post the order.

A moment later, the waiter returns with a beer for Jack and he wastes no time in opening it and gulping it down. He stares at the empty seat in front of him and continues to ponder on you and the rather disheartening news you had given him earlier in the week.

“He asked you to go on a vacation with him?”

“Yeah!” you beamed.

“A vacation,” he repeated in feigned joy. “Together… with Ian?”

“Yes, Jack,” you laughed. “For about a week I believe.”

“And only after two months together…. Wow…. Things are getting pretty serious between you guys, huh?”

“Well, two and a half months now and I guess so,” you shrugged. “I mean, I really like him. He’s one of the sweetest guys I’ve ever met, after you of course. Plus, I’ve been feeling really stressed out with things lately so a few days off and being in different setting just might be what I need right now.”

Jack motions to the waiter for another beer and the waiter readily complies. Once again Jack downs the drink as quickly as he received it in an attempt to drown his sorrows and his longing to be with you.

Moments later a slender, short-haired brunette donning a chic black dress hurriedly enters the restaurant.

“Good evening, ma’am,” says the hostess, stopping the mysterious brunette before she can venture too far, “can I help you?”

“Yes, Hi. I’m really late for a date,” she replies, her eyes surveying the restaurant for her date, “he’s probably- Oh! He’s over there!”

The waiter is handing Jack another beer and taking the empty bottle to discard it when the brunette approaches his table and introduces herself.

“Hi, you’re Jack right?”

“Yeah,” he looks up at her in question.”Are you Annie?”

“Yeah I am and really late, sorry about that but my bus caught some traffic on the highway.”

“It’s no problem,” Jack rises from his seat and quickly straightens out his brown suit jacket before shaking her hand and pulling out her chair in which she gladly sits on.

Jack signals for the waiter and he promptly returns with a menu for Annie and waits patiently for her to order. Since Jack already finished his second beer he requested a bottle of wine for him and Annie and once the waiter exits their date resumes.

“So Harry tells me you’re in the force with him,” Annie starts.

“Yes, I am. What else did he tell you?”

“Don’t worry, it was all the good stuff,” she smiles and Jack gives her a small smile back.

“In that case, he probably didn’t have a lot to say,” he jests.

“Don’t sell yourself too short now, it was enough to get me to come here.”

“Well, since you know about me, why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

Annie starts to go on about her interests, her job, how her day went, and her connection to Harry and his wife, Patty. Her connection to Harry and Patty is actually a pretty good story. Too bad Jack is too zoned out to pay attention to it. Annie is by no doubt charming and attractive but Jack can’t help his thoughts and attention from shifting back to you and Ian.

I’m not just jealous. How can you go on a vacation with someone you’ve only known for like two months?

But how can an idiot like me not have notice he’s in love with his best friend?

Time passes and the waiter stops by to collect their now empty plates. Jack nods every now and then and has been downing cups of wine quicker than he can notice. However, Annie does.

“Um, are you okay?” she questions.

“Hmm what? Yeah, why?”

“Oh, I don’t know, you just seem a little-”

Jack’s cup makes a loud clinking sound with the now empty wine bottle as he attempts to pour himself every last drop of the bottle before haphazardly tossing it into the ice bucket and chugging his cup of wine.

“Jack,” Annie calls for his attention.

His drunken eyes shoot up in question before releasing a tired sigh, finally recognizing what he’s doing.

“I’m sorry. I’m not normally like this on dates, or in life, I don’t even drink wine like that. You’re great, you’re beautiful, it’s not you,” he rambles.

“What is it then?”

“It’s me-– well, it’s this friend of mine.”

Annie, knowing exactly where this conversation is heading, props her elbow on the table and rests her head on her hand.

“Does this friend happen to be an ex-girlfriend by any chance?”

“Not exactly,” he looks down. “She’s my best friend. We’ve been friends since we were kids so we’re really close. She’s always been the one person I know I could trust indefinitely and she’s always been there for me, she just… she means so much to me.”

“Oh, I see, and what’s the issue with this best friend?”

“She’s going on a vacation with her boyfriend.”

“Wow, no, yeah, that seems,” she furrows her brows in confusion, “awful?”

“I mean they just started going out,” he motions with his hands. “Would you go on a vacation with a guy you knew for only, like, two months?”

“No, not really–”

“Exactly! He exclaims. “Why do they even have to go on a vacation? Why can’t they just go on another date or just hang out, something less serious than a vacation, why not go out to dinner or something, do one of those… what are they called? What are they called? What are they called?” he snaps his fingers, trying to think of the word he wants to say and not realizing he just said it.

“Uh, a date?”

“Yes!” he exclaims again. “Man, you’re so smart.”

“Yeah,” she flatly says. “Listen, you clearly have feelings for this friend of yours. Why don’t you just, I don’t know, tell her how you feel?”

“It’s too late for that,” he slumps in his chair. “(Y/N) has a boyfriend now and I’m just an idiot who didn’t know about his feelings soon enough. And she’s happy, she looks happy. It’s not right of me to ruin her happiness just because I want to be with her. I just wish I could get over her, why can’t I get over her?”

Annie huffs and her bangs gently fly up.

“Look, Jack, I’ve been where you’re at. You’ll get over her. You just feel like this now because you haven’t gotten any closure–”

“Closure!” he enthusiastically points at her. “That’s it! I need that! How do I get that?”

“Well, there’s no one way to it. Really it’s just whatever it takes so that you can finally say ‘I’m over you.’”

“I’m over you,” he repeats and motions with his hands. “That simple.”

Jack begins to look around his surroundings and an idea strikes him when he sees a man behind him talking on his cellular phone.

“Excuse me, sir,” he calls for the stranger’s attention but when that doesn’t work he scoots his seat closer to the man, nearly falling off from it, and continues to call for his attention until he finally turns around.

“Hold on a second,” the man says into his phone before directing his attention to Jack. “What?”

“Hi sir,” he slurs, “can I please borrow your phone? It’ll only be a minute.”

‘“I don’t know if you noticed but I’m currently using it”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed but you’re in the middle of having dinner with a pretty lady and you being on your phone right now is rude.”

After bickering with the stranger for a few minutes, and being quite unsuccessful in getting him to give him his phone, Jack grunts in frustration and begins to search for his badge.

“Look I didn’t wanna do this but,” he flashes his badge to the now startled stranger, “LAPD, sir, I'm gonna need you to surrender your phone to me right now, I don’t wanna have to call for backup.”

“Oh my god,” Annie murmurs under her breath, rubbing at her temples with her hands.

As expected, the man finally yields his phone to Jack and he quickly thanks him for it before turning back to Annie in his seat and dialing your number. His eyes are squinted and he messes up the first two times when marking your number but he finally gets it right the third time. He gets your answering machine and patiently waits to leave you a message.

“Hey (Y/N), it’s Jack. Just calling to let you know that I’m good. Everything is all good now. I’m really happy for you and Ian and the sudden vacation you’re both gonna go on. Feel free to bring me a keychain from wherever you go because I’m over you. That’s right. I am over you. And that, my darling (Y/N), is what we call closure.”

Jack lazily holds the phone above the ice bucket before dropping it in and leaning back in his chair and Annie immediately calls the waiter for the check.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The next day…..

Jack is awakened by a pounding ache in his head and the sudden exposure to daylight makes him cringe in pain even more. He slowly rises from his bed, closes his curtains, and goes to his medicine cabinet in the bathroom to search for some aspirin. Upon finding the desired drug, he pops one into his mouth, turns on his bathroom sink, and uses his hand to cup the water to drink and swallow the pill. He takes a few more gulps, finding himself suddenly incredibly thirsty, before brushing his teeth and putting back the aspirin. It’s when he closes the medicine cabinet and sees his reflection in the mirror that he realizes he’s still dressed in last his clothes from last night which prompts an important question in his mind.

How did I get home?

Jack cautiously opens part of his curtain and searches his neighborhood for his car. When he doesn’t find it he assumes his date called him a cab and is actually grateful she didn’t allow him to drive himself.

His date.

What was her name?... Andrea?... Or was it Anne?... Annie?

Immediately he begins to feel embarrassed for how foolish he must’ve acted last night. He already knows he’s gonna be getting an earful from Harry since he’s the one that set up the whole thing in hopes of helping John move on from you. Yet, it’s not like he didn’t want to try.

Jack sluggishly makes his way towards his kitchen heading specifically towards his refrigerator for a hangover cure. Right as he’s opening the door to his fridge he hears someone knock on his door. He glances at his watch, noting that it’s only a little past eight thirty in the morning, and wonders who could be at his door so early.

“Morning, sunshine,” you greet Jack when he opens the door.

“(Y/N)?”

You give Jack a quick once-over.

“You’re dressed a bit formal for our breakfast plan but I’m digging the dapper look,” you make your way to enter his apartment and he quickly moves aside, letting you in and leading you to his kitchen.

“Breakfast plan?” he questions again.

“Yeah, we were supposed to get breakfast today, don't you remember?” Jack stays silent with a pensive look on his face and you have your answer. “From the look on your face I take that as a no. Oh, how did your date go last night?”

“How’d you know about that?”

“You told me about it,” you chuckle. “Jesus, how much did you drink last night, you seem pretty out of it.”

“I might’ve drunk a little bit past the average standard of too much.”

“Wow, was the date really going that bad?”

“I honestly can’t remember much but I know it was less than ideal and I know for a fact it was my fault.”

“Why do you say that?” you wonder and suddenly you find yourself being looked at rather oddly by Jack. “And why are you staring at me like that?”

“I Just– I think I had a weird dream about you but I can’t remember.”

“Well that sounds fun. Maybe you can tell me about it over breakfast, if you’re still up for it?”

“Yeah, of course,” he nods. “Honestly food is just what I need right now. Just let me change,” Jack turns around and makes his way to his room but abruptly stops to turn towards you once more. “Did you and I speak on the phone last night by any chance?”

“No, I spent the night at Ian's. I actually haven't even had a chance to check my messages yet, mind if I use your phone?”

“Yeah sure, I’ll be out in a few,” Jack casually swats his hand in the air as an okay before retreating to his room.

You thank him as you move to retrieve his phone and dial your number and code to your answering machine. After about a minute you’re finally able to check your messages and smile in delight upon hearing Jack’s voice.

“Jack, I got a message from you.”

Immediately Jack comes out of his room, wearing only a tank top and his dress pants from last night and a look of panic on his face.

“You sound so wasted,” you giggle.

“(Y/N), give me the phone,” he quickly makes his way over to you but you start to move away towards the living room.

“No way, I love listening to your drunken rambles,” with a secure grip on the phone you run to one side of the couch and Jack anxiously follows.

“(Y/N), I need the phone, give me the phone, give me the phone now,” he pleads, anxiety clear as day in his voice.

Committed to retrieving the phone from you, Jack chases you in circles around the couch until he’s finally able to tackle you onto the couch and swat the phone away from you. However, by the look of pure shock on your face, he knows he’s too late.

“Shit,” he starts, rising from the couch and running a hand down his distressed face, “fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!…”

“You… you’re over me?” you slowly start to sit up on the couch. “When–when were you… under me?”

Jack continues to groan and pace the area, “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”

“I mean… it was only a message addressed to me. But… Jack… do you… are you … Jack,” you stand up and grab his arm, stopping his pacing and implore him to explain.

“Okay… okay fine,” he clears his throat. “So-uh basically, lately I realized I have-uh feelings for you…”

“Oh...,” you slowly sit back down to process Jack’s confession and Jack joins you on the couch.

“(Y/N), please say something.”

“.... Pineapple.”

“What?”

“You said say something and I can’t really think of anything to say at the moment.”

“Okay, that’s fair, this is all pretty sudden.”

“Ya think?” you scoff.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do this or Ian. I didn’t mean for you to find out this way. Actually I didn’t mean for you to find out about this ever, I know Ian is a good guy and he makes you happy–”

“Yeah, he is a great guy and he does make me happy,” you say aloud, yet it’s more to yourself as you’re struggling to make sense of all this. “Oh god, Ian,” you rub your temples. “Why now, Jack? Why couldn’t you realize all this before?”

“I mean, what difference does it make now… unless…. do you?... (Y/N)....”

You sit silently hug yourself.

“(Y/N), do you have feelings for me?”

“Yes, Jack, I’ve had feelings for you for the past I don’t know how many years now,” you snap, standing from your seat and pacing back and forth.

“Wait what?” now Jack stands from his seat and stops right in front of you accidentally causing you to collide with him and he instinctively holds you to steady you. “You–you’ve had feelings for me? Are they… are they over?”

“Are you over me?”

You gaze into each others’ eyes, each searching for an answer to their question. You catch Jack look at your lips and you can’t help but look back to his. Before either of you know it you’re slowly leaning into each other until there’s nothing left between you and your lips finally meet. Jack’s arms immediately snake around, bringing you in closer as he kisses you hungrily. You kiss him with the same craving and hunger as this is what you’ve wanted for so long. Yet, after a few seconds you pull back breaking the kiss and turning away from him.

“I’m sorry,” you turn once more to look at him before heading for the door, “I have to go… I just can’t right now, Jack.”

With that said, you exit his apartment and Jack slumps down onto his couch. He traces his lips with his fingertips recalling the taste and feel of yours lips on his before throwing his head back and sighing.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Later that day…..

Jack enters his apartment with Harry following behind him.

“You want a beer?” he asks Harry.

“Can’t.”

“What are you practicing sobriety all of a sudden?”

“Yeah, when the Nile runs dry.”

Jack laughs as he enters his kitchen and opens a beer for himself, Harry leans on a counter and Jack joins him to stand on the opposite side.

“I actually can’t right now. Patty and I have dinner plans in about an hour and I can’t be late or I’ll miss the earful she’s gonna give me for how drunk you were on your date with Annie and if I miss that it’s only gonna be worse when I get home.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I really did want to try and move on but the entire night I couldn’t get (Y/N) out of my mind. I still haven’t talked to her since this morning ...”

“(Y/N) just needs time, Jack,” Harry reaches over the counter and comfortingly pats Jack’s shoulder.

“What if I lose her, Harry? And I mean completely. What if she doesn’t even want to keep me as a friend?”

“That’s not gonna happen. No matter what she decides, you guys have been friends for years and I know (Y/N), she’s not just gonna throw all that down the drain. You guys will get through this.”

Harry glances at his watch and begins to straighten himself out to leave.

“I gotta go. You’ll be okay?”

“I’ll find a way to be fro tonight,” Jack takes a few gulps of his beer. “Thanks again for taking me to bring my car back from the restaurant.”

“You can just pay me back a beer some other day. See you tomorrow, Jack.”

Harry exits Jack’s apartment and he’s about to go into his room until he hears a knock on his door. Thinking it’s Harry, he puts down his beer and goes to open the door.

“Rethought that beer did you– (Y/N)...,” he momentarily freezes.

“Hey, Jack, can I come in?”

“Yeah, of course,” Jack moves aside allowing you to walk in and you stand by his kitchen counter. “How are you?”

“Honestly? A lot better. And you?”

“At the moment I’m just really glad to see you. (Y/N), can we just forget what happened this morning?”

“Jack–”

“I don’t wanna lose you, (Y/N), I know you’re with Ian and I know things could probably get kinda weird because of what I said but I don’t want to not be with you in any way.”

You smile at his sincerity and your heart flutters within you as you say your next words.

“I don’t want to not be with you either,” Jack grins in relief at your words. “And as for Ian, he really is a great guy… but he’s not you.”

Jack’s eyes light up at your words.

“You mean?...”

You nod.

“I broke up with Ian. It’s always been you, Jack.”

Instantly Jack wraps his arms around you bringing you in for a tight, warm hug and briefly lifting you up. You happily giggle and hug him back, blushing when he pulls back to kiss your forehead.

“You have no idea how happy you’ve just made me,” he kisses your forehead once more. “Aw man, poor Ian, though.”

“Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. Now that I’ve had time to think about it we were moving kinda too fast with the vacation, he’s great but I did kinda just meet him.”

“Well his loss is my gain and I am not letting you go,” he looks lovingly into your eyes before slowly leaning in and capturing you both in an ardent kiss.

The first kiss of many that is to happen in your newfound relationship and the kiss that is to kickstart the new chapter in your lives together.

#jack traven x reader #you #keanu reeves #hope y'all enjoy!

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