#I love you weird queer identities I have to look up and learn about on the spot to define my favorite guys

[kakusu-shipping]

🏳️‍🌈 for shirokuma :D or if you want to, any other character in the bear polycule!

YEEEEEEAH QUEER BEARS!!!!

Sense this is the only ask I've gotten so far for this I'll just do the whole polycule because I love them all and haven't talked about them in forever

Shirokuma - He/She, Bigender, Biromantic Lesbian

Monokuma - He/It/They, Trans Man, Demiromantic Gay

Mr. Grizz - He/Him, Trans Man, Bisexual

Funtime Freddy (Funfetti) - He/They/Neos, Trans Masc, Pansexual

Toy Freddy (Teddy) - He/Him, Panromantic Asexual

Jackpot - He/It/Neos, Genderqueer, Omniromantic Asexual Queer

Tad Mulholland - Any Pronouns, They/Them (plural), Polygender, Queeromantic Asexual

Riri - They/Them, Non-Binary, Genderfluid, Bisexual

[crimsonender]

have you ever thought that all of this hate comes from the fact that youre genuinely a rude, drama hungry individual? and that everytime you hide behind your gender identity it just makes everything worst? spent years wondering why masc people didnt have a place in lots of queer communities, but after seeing how MUCH you wave your flag to excuse your drama milking of people you dont like? seeing how many people on this website defend such behavior and do the same?? i get why i got lots of weird stares over the years, just because im masc. just focus on streaming and making content, stop farming drama if youre gonna cry mysandry after any asks. and before you generalize me to not give a shit about my take i hate lily and i blocked her years ago, and yall weirdos should have done the same

I know it seems like "I'm one of the good ones" is gonna be the truth that sets you free but I'm here to tell you: no amount of shrinking yourself and good behaviour will ever make you good enough for those people.

Let me ask you

Are you going up to someone like Sai and telling her that she makes all lesbians look bad? Are you telling Anthony that because of him, people hate bisexuals more?

Why do you think that's okay to do to me?

I'm a human being. I get upset. I laugh at stupid people even when it's distasteful. I play videogames with my friends. I go out into my community and live my life in ways I do not share here on the internet. I am imperfect and I am learning and growing. I have been through so much, and I have so much left I still want to do. I've loved, and been loved. I've been hurt, and I've hurt other people. Just like every other human on the face of this earth.

You know it is odd. LGBTQ people cover drama alllll the time. (And yeah don't get me wrong Sai gets an absymal amount of homophobia and Anthony gets plenty of biphobia) But when that person is trans, namely, when that person is a trans man, I guess that says something about their gender? Odd how that works. To say someone like me is the root of all poor treatment towards trans men is incredibly silly.

[epickiya722]

Actually, now I'm thinking about it, it's odd to me that Midoriya and Uraraka look similar and maybe that's on purpose.

Round eyes & face

Facial marks (Freckles for Midoriya, blush stickers for Uraraka)

"Brunette" (green hair is considered being a brunet/te in anime logic)

Shorter than the others

Now given that, what if Uraraka "falling in love" with Midoriya wasn't her actually falling in love? What if it was her having a self-reflection and accepting herself?

Further thinking about it... they're practically the same person.

They're both compassionate, kind. They learn to adapt to changes. They're cute, but they're vicious if pushed far enough. They won't give up on people or in a fight. Hell, they both float, use long range attacks, and close range ones. Works in teams of three (Uraraka-Asui-Hado, Midoriya-Bakugou-Todoroki) under a top Pro Hero.

And they both "rival" some feral blond that they don't act "normal" around.

What if Midoriya wasn't meant to be Uraraka's crush but her mirror? Mind you whenever someone points out her "crush" it's not someone you would turn to for love advice.

Aoyama is Aoyama (think about that reveal), Ashido practically ships anybody with anybody when there's no real chemistry, and Toga has a twisted concept of love.

You really think I would trust any of them on telling me I have a "crush"?

There's also the fact that Uraraka herself during her talk with Midoriya says they're both "oddballs". That whole talk during 342 comes off more as someone talking about their feelings about their identity and relating to a friend who feels the same about themselves than supposedly "romantic". When someone is called an "oddball", it means that person is "weird". They're not part of the "norm".

Sometimes it comes off as having different interests, like someone liking the arts unlike the majority of the group who likes sports.

Or it's someone who identifies as queer.

What if these last few chapters of Toga and Uraraka was Uraraka accepting herself?

@darkcircles4lyfe points out a detail that I didn't catch until now in this post here.

In this scene, Toga has a hold of that All Might keychain. We know it's of importance to Uraraka because Midoriya gave it to her. We also know that once before Uraraka snatched it away from her when Toga first got a hold of it during the PLF War Arc. Here, she doesn't do it. Granted, because she's bang the hell up and probably even isn't aware of her surroundings. But on Horikoshi's part, what if that's on purpose? What if here, Toga is taking the keychain as a way of saying Uraraka is finally accepting herself and her feelings? That Midoriya was that mirror she kept looking into and questioning until this very moment?

And let's be honest here, it's not like Horikoshi isn't incapable of writing M/F ships. I just think IzuOcha is a ship he doesn't intend to make romantic because of how underdeveloped it is.

Compare it to Kamijirou and Kirimina, it is pale. Also, make note of those two pairs.

The characters in those ships also have opposing physical features.

Kamijirou - dark and light hair colors, the extrovert and the introvert

Kirimina - Spiky hair and curly hair, sharp edges and round curves

A lot of pairs Horikoshi puts together in which the characters are close (romantic or platonic) have some opposing features to them.

Gentle Crimimal and La Brava - tall and short, dark hair and light hair, one is more hands on and the other isn't

Eraser Head & Present Mic - quiet and loud, dark hair and light hair, close combat & long range

Bakugou's and Jiro's parents - quiet & loud, dark hair and light hair

It's his shtick.

But for Midoriya and Uraraka? They are just genderbend versions of each other!

That's really all I have to say here. And if you disagree, fine. Don't care for the input though, keep it to yourselves. (I say this because some of you are just damn disrespectful.)

I myself don't think IzuOcha is a bad ship, but I just don't think it's a ship Horikoshi has on his agenda. Let alone wants the audience to perceive them as "romantic" but as a "mirror".

[thekaratcake-blog]

Clearin' some shit up

Some people have decided to take my issue with misinformation as an issue with the groups that spread it, so let's clear some shit up First, the most important shit I fully and wholeheartedly support everyone in the queer community, this includes intersex people, anyone on the trans spectrum, anyone of any sexuality I'm a firm believer in "don't fight for what you think a community wants, actually ask them what they want" and "nothing about us without us" I however absolutely despise misinformation, pseudoscience or general disregard for science and I will call it out when I see it I absolutely despise things using other terms of legitimate identity or causes to try and elevate themselves to an unearned level of legitimacy, however if you're open and honest about the reailty and level of legitimacy of your label, that's fine, if you're not pretending it's something that it's not, that's fine, as long as, of course, it isn't hurting anyone If you claim something that isn't scientifically supported, that's okay, don't expect me to take it as absolutely fact, but if it's not hurting anyone, that's okay If you claim something that is actively against the scientific consensus, that is not okay, expect backlash from me If you think I'm wrong about one of my views on a scientific or at least somewhat solid basis, I'm more than happy to hear, I want to learn and understand people as best as possible, and being wrong is great as it means I've learnt and grown However obviously if your basis for me being wrong is "well I think so" or "well you can't absolutely 100% prove that this doesn't happen so" basically any sort of fallacious reasoning, I'd personally suggest you don't waste your time, but if you want to try anyway, expect me to call out flawed or fallacious reasoning If you just want to message me to insult me or say useless shit that doesn't lead anywhere or progress anything, go nuts, I will then reply to it as if you said something completely different and turn it into an interesting learning or fact moment, so that it's not entirely wasted And finally, I'm not looking for this shit, I'm not on any tags for it, infact I've blacklisted a few of them to try and see less of it, but tumblr keeps showing it to me, I am not targetting any groups, I just call out misinformation when I see it, and tumblr is just for some reason only showing it to me from those specific groups, but I've called it out for groups that I'm in as well The reality is, I'm here on tumblr for memes, and because my partner @muffinmuffinx3 is on here, and I love them and like to see and share lil memes back and forth, but if I see shit that I have something to say about, I generally do, it's just how I am, I'm autistic, I'm weird, I'm just lke that, sorry, that's just how I do things really, maybe it'll change over time and I'll start to behave differently, but if that does happen, it'll be naturally, not because someone yelled at me and told me I'm doing tumblr wrong If you have any questions about my beliefs or suggestions of something to add to this, send it to me in an ask or reblog this or reply to it or whatever you want to do really, lmk, even private message me, I don't really care how you do it just lmk

[velvetvexations]

These days people get so weird when you point out that TERFs do more than target trans women and it's as exhausting as it is confusing.

I've had people tell me it's wrong for me to bring up the fact that TERFs and radical feminists target bi women because it's wrong for me to not center trans women in literally *every single discussion* of TERFism despite the fact that it is well known by anyone paying attention that TERFs gleefully target other queer people too. TERFs openly admit that they use ace/aro exclusionism and transmedicalism as recruitment tactics because once you get a queer person to turn against one identity it's easier to get them to turn against another. And the first big wave of TERF ideology and radical feminism went so hard on getting bi women out of lesbian spaces that now people legit think butch/feme are lesbian exclusive terms when they never were. They intentionally destroyed all connection bisexuals had to their shared history and culture until basically everyone is parroting their words without realizing, and are still responsible for some of the most vile biphobia circulating today. Like hate to break it to the "bi women shouldn't bring their cishet bf to pride" types but idc how much you say you love trans people you are still walking and talking like a TERF and deserve to be called on it.

And ofc they absolutely target trans people of all genders, acknowledging they ways they harm trans men doesn't mean you think they don't target trans women.

This is legit why I'm always one of the first people to point out what TERFs and radfems actually believe and how their ideology works and what dogwhistles you need to look out for, because imo the current idea that trans women are legit the only queer people meaningfully harmed by TERFism is happening specifically because no one bothered to learn what a TERF actually is beyond "transphobe", which is also how we get entire movements of queer people parroting TERF, SWERF, and radfem talking points word for word and not seeing a problem because they aren't transphobic(or thinking all they need to do to fight TERFs is put a DNI banner up on their blog and talk about punching transphobes).

If people refuse to actually learn what TERFs are and why they believe what they do we will never be able to defeat them. They will always sneak in, every bar will turn into the proverbial nazi bar, you have to fully recognize them to weed them out before it's too late, and so many people are completely uninterested in doing that.

Love this ask anon. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 I didn't know that at all about butch/femme having been used by bi women as well, thank you for telling me about it.

[racefortheironthrone]

I learned recently that Emma Frost is actually a natural brunette (instead of blonde). However, I also recently read "X-Men Phoenix Warsong" where the rest of Emma's thousand daughters are revealed. In their capsules, they are all shown to have blonde hair, and since Sublime probably didn't see the need to dye their hair then I assume it's their natural color. Since the Cuckoos have different hair than Emma as well as an improved diamond form, I'm wondering if they aren't purely clones. Could Sublime have included the DNA of one or more other mutants to enhance their powers? Could the Cuckoos have a "father?"

Yes, Emma is a natural brunette (although her mother Hazel and most of her siblings are blond, which is plot relevant for later) who was relentlessly Mean Girled by the popular blond girls at her private school. There's a whole fascinating sexual psychodrama about how the ideal form that Emma transformed herself through extensive plastic surgery and high-end cosmetology and fashion into is the avatar of her stock photo "bullies" that I'm not qualified to get into, but needless to say Connor Goldsmith has you covered on this.

And yes, one of the many problematic elements of the creative decision to have the Stepford Cuckoos (hat tip again to Connor) be Emma's biological children is that they're all naturally blond identical quintuplets who all look like young Emmas, even though Emma's appearance is deliberately, consciously artificial and genetics does not work that way, Lamarck.

However, this is due in part to the fact that they are not technically clones of Emma - although they are clones of each other, created en masse originally in their thousands by the Weapon Plus program. That fact is potentially quite significant, because it is highly likely that the Cuckoos' genetic father chosen by Weapon Plus (out of some weird Lamarckian eugenic theory, because the Super-Soldier Serum does not work that way either) is none other than Steve Rogers (whose preserved DNA samples as part of Project Rebirth makes him also Weapon Zero), and who also happens to be blond with blue eyes.

I like this idea a lot, mostly for the comedy value of the whole Emma/Steve ship. The Cuckoos historically think that Cap is an old square (then again, they think anyone over thirty is old). But I do kind of love the thought of them trying to parent trap Emma and Steve together as a prank - only for Steve to become the most awkwardly well-meaning "dad who stepped up" ever. I think the Cuckoos would absolutely hate being dragged to Mets games, but they'd probably be really surprised when Cap takes them to MoMa the next weekend and demonstrates a frighteningly in-depth knowledge of art history and a surprising familiarity with queer NYC circa the 20s and 30s.

[bootsandsugarr]

Song of the day☾

Today, I was going to pick lonely people - America. HOWEVER, I've been picking too many sad songs. So, the song for today is featuring banjo, mostly just because i want a banjo soooooo bad. I'm wondering if that should be my birthday gift for myself. I want one so bad you don't even understand how bad. I will treat that thing like my baby if I get one.

I've also been getting back into history which makes me happy. History has always been one of the things I've obsessed over growing up. Right now I'm taking a women's U.S. history class, so you can imagine how happy I am to do the homework for that. It is so captivating! and obviously so relevant to my life, as a woman that is living in the U.S. lol. I've been learning so much about the women that came before me, in and out of class. It makes me feel so much more connected to my femininity and what exactly that means to me. I don't think I'm very vocal about being bi but it's definitely a big part of my identity. I wish I felt more freedom to explore that, but I think a part of that being undeveloped is my warped view of what being sapphic looks like. I was watching a video essay about Jane Addams, her queerness, and long term relationship with Mary Rozet Smith. People debated the validity of their love because it was speculated that they weren't sexually active with each other. This! is what I'm saying, wlw relationships are so sexualized(news to no one). Which I think bleeds into my own perception of the validity of my sexuality. Honestly even hetero relationships have such weird ideas about sexual activity. I'll cut myself off but I have A LOT to say about this.

Kinda related because woman, my mood swings have been off the charts, thank you womanhood.👎 Womanhood + the stress of having a birthday. Cant wait for my birthday to just happen so I can focus of other things that stress me out.

Today feels like it didn't happen, time flies when youre doing nothing! Woke up, balled out on a sims house I'm making with my sister, went to work, came home, did some homework, now I'm here. The power was out all day today because of maintenance being done on the lines outside the house.

I know I started by saying I didn't want to focus on the sad but the song's lyrics are another reason why it's song of the day. Not that the lyrics are sad, not even to say that today was necessarily negative, just a lot of introspection..

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

Slightly boring question, I know, but what LGBTQ+ headcanons do you have for the mercs (if any) , and for any of those, how do you think they realized?

LGBTQ+ Headcanons For The TF2 Mercs

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oh no anon this isn't boring at all, I love talking about queer shit, and TF2 so this is super fun for me!

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Uhhhh, light homophobia and transphobia??? I tried not to add any but a little bit of it!

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Demo is trans and gay. He was like twenty when he realized he was trans, like this dude was sitting in his home, and it just randomly clicked? Immediately thinks,

"Oh, that explains a lot." He had absolutely no clue what to do with that information, but he eventually figured out how to be comfortable in his own skin. As for him being gay, it was probably just the natural progression of things. He liked men before, and he liked men after. This man was so scared to tell his mom that she literally didn't care, she loves her son.

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Engie is pan and trans. Engie just always knew, like felt it in his bones knew. One of those kids who the moment they could talk just goes, "Oh yeah, I'm a boy now." His parents would just tell him he was a tomboy and that he'd grow out of it. Wrong! He only became comfortable with his identity when he was fifteen, only after years of internalized guilt and transphobia though. Uh, he definitely had to keep it a secret for a lot longer than that. He also just always knew he was pan. He always liked women and men, and he realized he didn't even care if the person he liked was both or neither. He just likes people!

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I think Heavy is bisexual,and like, he didn't even realize it until he met the other mercs. He just ignored the fact that he liked men. After all, every man around him seemed to only like women, so he just focused on women. (Well, not really, lmao) anyway! One night, all the mercs were talking about their escapades, and then some mercs brought up their experiences with men, and he just stared at them and was like,

"You, you can do that?" The team is just like,

"Yeah???"

"Oh."

(I've seen other people headcanon this and I love it and agree so much.)

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Medic is intersex and it just went unnoticed? Lack of proper medical care and a neglectful mother will do that to you. He's glad, though. Growing up, it was confusing for him, especially when he realized that his body was different, but he learned to love himself. He actually learned that he was intersex indirectly. He read some books on anatomy and realized he didn't look like the people in the book and that his body couldn't quite be defined as male or female. Would only be able to put a name to it years later. (I think he'd have Klinefelter syndrome) He's also gay! I think he just always knew, he just never had interest in women, but always chalked it up to being to busy with his work and studies to have time for dating, then he kissed a guy, and oh boy it clicked then. Once, he didn't have to worry as much about being harmed for his identity he became the silly guy you see now.

(His ass does not have a wife! He would call his husband his wife.)

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I want to trans Scout's gender so bad, but alas, it's funnier if he's cis with T-boy swag. BUT, this man is a queer. Bi disaster. He had a stroke when he first joined the other mercs. This man had to work through a lot of shit, all while pretending he isn't working with men who make him question his sexuality on a daily basis. I think at first he tries to convince himself that it's nothing or battles with extreme internalized homophobia and self hatred, and it takes him forever to accept the fact that it isn't weird or wrong to like both men and women. He's still just scared that even though he likes both, he's not good enough for either. (Oops, got angsty my bad.)

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Sniper is queer but just doesn't care too much about exploring his sexuality. He knows he has a preference for men but also has never considered being attracted to other genders, but also doesn't think he'd mind, and over all he just, doesn't know, and it's easier for him to just call himself queer and not have to figure it out. I don't think there was a defining moment, I think one day he just realized he wasn't attracted to just women anymore.

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"You can't just headcanon every shapeshifter as genderfluid!" Uh, yes, I can. So Spy is genderfluid. Spy dress might not be canon, but it's canon in my heart. He has no problem with being masculine one day and feminine the next. I think he realized on a mission one time (not with the other mercs) where he had to present fem for some reason, and he really liked it. He's also bi with a preference for women. He dealt with a lot of internalized homophobia like Scout did (like father like son and all that), but eventually came to terms with it when Scout came out actually. He realized that it probably wasn't that weird, especially when the other mercs chimed in with their sexualities.

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Soldier is pan, but he is also another case of "I want to trans his gender so bad, but it's funnier if he's cis." The comedic value of him not understanding being trans so he's supportive in the weirdest ways. Um, as for him being pan, he just doesn't care. He likes anyone who's a similar personality type to him, gender doesn't matter. It's all the same to him. I feel like it's another case that he always knew, dealt with internalized homophobia, and then the other mercs helped him work through it. (The team is very helpful when it comes to being queer, nothing else, though, lmao)

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Pyro is well, a whole bunch of identities, but I personally rock with, mtf trans agender, pan, and ace. So the mtf and agender part might seem kinda complicated, but I'll do my best to explain! I feel like Pyro was born male, but just always hated they're body and always wanted to have a female body, but then they realized that they wanted to have a feminine body, but no gender, so they did just that. Another case of them liking everyone, they just have a lot of love to give. Being ace, for Pyro, is no sexual attraction at all, just wanting to love a person, wanting romance, not anything more. They realized everything separately, being trans when they were around their teens, basically going through puberty and realizing how awful it felt for them to present as male, being agender years later when someone referred to them neutrally and they really liked it, and being pan when they forst started viewing people romantically, and ace when they got into a relationship.

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Not that it was asked but Miss Pauling is a lesbain btw

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Ah, these queers. UH Medic did everyone's surgeries, in case you we're wondering. He has so many uteruses lying around.

Some short and sweet hcs, uhhh, i have no idea what order im writing anything rn to be completely honest, I'm hoping I'll get through my flufftober asks, then some angst and some other asks but we'll see if I switch this up.

I had such a hard time writing this, I kept getting embarrassed at my writing style and thinking it was the worst thing ever written 😭

[jewish-vents]

My entire life, I've yearned for the kind of community the Jewish community and Judaism have provided me. I found out I had Jewish ancestry when I was a kid, I looked into it more later and realized my most recent Jewish ancestor (like three-ish generations back) was almost certainly forcibly converted out, and decided to convert to like. Make amends for that I guess and also because I really vibed with the holidays and how we turn up everywhere in history bc we keep doing cool stuff despite consistently shitty circumstances.

But I digress.

I have waited my WHOLE LIFE trying to experience the joy becoming Jewish has shown me, and that gets shit on constantly.

My sister has started making a truly obscene number of Jew jokes. My mom scoffs at all the 'nonsense rules' and has said repeatedly that she thinks choosing a 'restrictive' religion is dumb and I've made a mistake. She even said it's an insult to HER parenting skills that I would seek out religion after she tried to teach me to know better.

My dad is dead but I never ever in a million years would have told him even if he were alive, and my sister thinks it's funny to threaten to 'out' me as Jewish to his relatives even though they're basically KKK-adjacent so she actually enjoys threatening mg safety at this point. (Yay family right?)

My friends have turned everything into an Israel/Palestine discussion lately and I know damn well what they're doing when they start saying truly horrible shit about Israelis and looking at me. They get mad if I try to temper their extremism so I've given up. I barely talk to them anymore and I spend more and more time with other Jews from temple and I don't want to like. Isolate myself from all non-Jews I guess bc I've always felt like that leads to weirdness and perpetuates shit about Jews being unfriendly I guess idk?

Anyway I digress again. My point is I'm really sick of constantly being expected to tolerate it when people think I shouldn't be Jewish.

Other queer people think I'm somehow compromising my queer identity by being Jewish, leftists think I hunt Palestinian children for sport now apparently, right-wingers think I traffic good Christian babies for organ harvesting or some shit idfk, my friends think that if I'm not being more vitriolic in my hatred of Israel than they already are I'm some kind of secret rabid Netanyahu fan, my family think I've been recruited into a cult apparently and the only other people who show me even an ounce of compassion or regard are other Jews and Gd knows there's like ten of us and that number is unlikely to increase.

Just. Fuck. I've put blood, sweat, tears and money into this, I invested more time and emotional commitment into this than I have into going to college or choosing a career, I love it more than anything and have only loved it more the more I learned about it, and all I get when I express this or even just let slip that I am Jewish and chose to be, I get nothing but hatred. I will never understand how a religion that has spent all 5000 years of our existence minding our business and arguing about the same book over and over can possibly have offended this many people with our existence.

Dmn anon, that is a lot you're dealing with right now. I'm so sorry you're surrounded by people who clearly don't respect you. Because yes this is a lack of basic respect, and it is antisemitic. Now I don't know how old you are and how safe you are, but if you can safely do so, set very hard boundaries. Do not tolerate this amount of disrespect towards who you are. It is hard, and many of us have had to go through similar situations, as you can read all over this blog. But I think having to spend your life surrounded by people who make you feel unsafe and disrespected is worse. I know sometimes there are situations in which people cannot safely set these boundaries, I hope it's not your case, but if it is feel free to come here to vent again.

I know you don't want to isolate yourself from goyim. Many Jewish people don't want to. Sadly, when people disrespect us like this, they're the ones isolating us. It's not your fault. Seek people who love and accept you. Sadly, a good chunk of goyim won't - I'm not saying everyone, obviously, but a portion. Having a good Jewish support network seems to be more and more important, whether it's irl or online.

I hope you can soon be in an environment that's safer and more accepting

- 🐺

[possibilistfanfiction]

I love Beatrice feels about Avas gender identity (or lack of). And how, for Beatrice, her womanhood is still an important part of her, even if she expresses that part differently than other women. And how Bea is just down for the ride when Ava experiments with their gender expression, just endless support and love and just letting Ava try out whatever they want. Like the scene with the binder, Ava wasnt visibly uncomfortable or weirded out, she just said that it wasnt something for her, and Bea never discouraged her of trying it out by telling her that she wouldnt like it, or other masculine things that fit better, like the suit. So yeah, thanks for having someone like Ava who doenst give a fuck about how she "should" dress and act as told by society and then Beatrice, for whom womanhood is still an important part of, but she puts her personal own spin on it, so she still feels like herself and happy. So, yeah you said you already have two butch!Bea prompts, so I just wanted to request a Avatrice fic with some happy gender expressions/feels it doesnt have to be butch!Bea AU, if you want. But yeah, I love how you write Beas butch style but still in touch with her womanhood. (And of course her kicking ass in Aikaido class ;) )

‘wow,’ you say, a little breathless. ava grins, spins around in their tuxedo slacks and button down with the sleeves rolled up to their elbows, an old binder of yours that’s loose on them but still offers some compression underneath, paired with patent leather loafers and a tie loose around their neck. they’ve slicked their hair back neatly and are grinning, arms outstretched. ‘you look amazing.’

‘yeah?’

‘of course,’ you say, as if there was any other possibility. ava wraps her arm around your waist and looks in the mirror at the both of you together: it’s a little different, because you’re used to ava in the dresses and crop tops and flowy pants he loves, an old favorite pair of overalls — but it’s, like, really, really hot. you’ve learned through your friends and therapy and ava’s own deep exuberance around queerness that you really are in love in so many of its forms, the textures it takes and allows; while you feel much, much better and safer and more comfortable and at ease in yourself when you’re in loose, easy pants, your chest flat, your hair short, you have never begrudged ava their expansion. they’ve seen so, so much, lived through more pain than anyone should ever have to, so everything about them, even at their most annoying, is beautiful to you.

‘if i wore a packer into a cathedral, do you think i would be struck down or something?’

it takes a second too long for your brain to get unstuck from the heat that races down your spine; ava smirks. ‘are you —‘ unfortunately your voice comes out a little strangled and you have to regroup — ‘are you wearing one?’

‘nah,’ ava says. ‘thought about it, but these pants are kinda tight and if i have to sit through some dumbass pomp and circumstance at the vatican i’m at least going to be comfortable.’

you hum, the best you can do.

‘maybe i’ll wear it tomorrow with that new skirt i got in madrid though,’ she says, far too casual for the victorious expression on her face. 

‘well, you do know god best.’

‘that’s so true,’ ava says, preening again and then turning toward you. ‘gender expression, totally cool with god, if you can believe that.’

‘i suppose i can.’ ava’s smirk softens into an easy smile, one you revel in every time it’s for you, the way sunflowers turn toward the sun. 

‘plus, this little vest situation you have going on is, like, so hot. god can’t begrudge me your arms, not after all i’ve done.’

you huff at their obvious delight in flustering you, but it’s summer and very hot and, really, the light sweater vest you’d picked out to go with your very church-appropriate slacks is also quite tame. 

‘i love you,’ they say, softening again, and kiss your cheek. ‘now, let’s go scandalize some conservatives, shall we?’

you laugh, unable to resist ava’s warmth, again and again. ‘we shall.’

[scarletspider-lily]

this bullshit discourse around cishet aromantic men is driving me insane and im not aromantic or aspect in the slightest but i gotta rant. because it's just getting very ridiculous at this point, because people make assumptions about everyone and also want to twist the definition of being queer- for some reason?? 1) "well- well they dont get oppressed!! >:(" sorry, pause, why the FUCK are we making "oppression" a part being lgbtq+ ? is this some new fucking requirement?? are you people okay?? i dont give a fuck if some queer child has had the best life ever in a super inclusive area from the second they were born, i would be happy for them?? maybe you should too? listen, ive faced oppression for being bisexual, and have felt envious of those with accepting family and whatnot, but what im not going to do is discredit my fellow queer person for facing "less" or no oppression at all for their identity. crazy take, but i think the goal should be to reduce queer oppression...

and oppression is not... some fixed scale type of thing, someone was trying to say that being asked "when will you get married?" to aro people wasn't oppression. as if that is not the only thing aro people face, as if instituitions like marriage dont exist, with certain economic benefits aro people can't partake in, and social constructs making certain people seem "weird" and straight up ostracized from social groups if they choose not to partake in romance.

2) amatonormativity is a thing, look it up. i get that it may be frustrating if you are allo to accept that youve been taught a lot of stuff about romance that seems magical and all encompassing and you dont want to give it up, but no one is asking you to do that. i used to be taken aback at some things aro folks pointed out, but as ive read more, ive realized that romance is wonderful to some people but shouldnt be held up as the ultimate pedestal in society. so, romanticize romance and whatnot if you personally want to, but understand that certain social constructs may harm people, especially those who do not want relationships for whatever reason. plus, learning about amatonormativity has helped me positively go about my own relationships- platonic and otherwise! 3) im gonna piss people off with this one, but please stop with the bullshitty radfem takes about cishet men being the ultimate spawn of satan, or something. the jokes here and there were one thing, but some of you guys actually believing that most of what cishet men do is inherently evil is legitimately concerning and this doesnt do much to actually help any matters. no, the man choosing to have another hookup this week or continuing to fuck a female friend-with-benefits isnt the ultimate enemy here against women. most takes on "hookup culture" generalize a lot of people's experiences, and i know there is research backing multiple perspectives on this, but at the end of the day what needs to be realized is that you cannot stop two consenting people from doing things together. it has no impact on you, and does not have a grand impact on society. unless you have definitive proof that whatever evil man you're talking about is "using women", there's no point to what you are saying, and if there is such a man, cishet aro men still are legitimate in their identity. would you exclude gay people from the community because of gay people who do bad things? would you do that for most identities? no? what makes this so drastically different, then? dont pull the oppression argument again for the love of god anyways, i hope all the cishet aro men and aro people in general are having a nice day. you will always be a part of the lgbtq+ community. dont let anyone tell you otherwise, or discredit you for the amount of "oppression" you face, as im sure they dont know half of any struggles you have. and if you (or any queer person in general) do happen to have few struggles, im very happy for you, as that's how it should be!!

[flyin-shark]

I'm the anon who asked all the curious questions about sexuality and gender!

First off, just to answer your question about what it might mean to be "a guy in a girl way" - So this can obviously mean a lot of things for a lot of different people, and if I were to get into the nitty gritty we could be here all day :P

But actually I was trying to express my situation in "cishet" language. So I'm agender. I'm afab. I use he/him and I am most comfortable with being thought of and referred to as if I was a guy.

But for all intents and purposes people are going to assume that I'm a woman if they don't know otherwise. I'm androgynous sure, but I'm petite to a fault, and never transitioned physically in any way, so to most people who meet me casually, they will assume that I'm a slightly androgynous and gnc woman.

I am polyamorous, and one of my partners is a mostly cishet dude. I know that he most likely wouldn't be (sexually) into me if I was a cis guy. But then again, I am not a cis guy. And I don't question his love or attraction, or respect for my gender. But I do insist that him being with me makes him at least "a little bit bisexual".

It's obviously very complicated, and like. I really respect that you sat down and learned about the community and the terminology etc despite how it might not be a huge part of your life. That's very valuable, and in and of itself, it's a very refreshing and healing thing.

I think the value of allyship is too often understated. Up to and including by the notion that if you are a true ally, you must be some kind of queer in denial.

That said, I do think that to be a true ally (and I think you are in this process!) it's necessary to acknowledge (as you do) that the categories and labels are all just approximations. This includes "cis het". It's ok to have these moments of confusion and just take them for what they are, because at the end of the day human experience is messy and complicated. It doesn't have to threaten your identity as such, because the identity is just the label you currently feel comfy with.

So for example if we met and you didn't know me well (as a co-worker or whatever), you might find me attractive thinking I was a cute lady. If you then asked me out and I knew you were cishet I would probably gently explain that I'm not your type/it wouldn't work for me.

If you met me knowing beforehand that I'm a dude who looks a bit weird, you might not feel the same attraction because your brain has put me in the box of "dudes".

But then if you got to know me and we became close or something, you might start to feel attraction based on liking me as a person and me looking the way I do. And then you might feel bad for it, because you would feel that this attraction means you don't respect my gender or something.

Obviously we are likely not going to meet so that's a completely hypothetical example, but in the latter scenario I would actually take your attention way more seriously. And I think so should you (if a similar situation ever arose).

Because attraction based on knowing a person intimately transcends gender and at that point I wouldn't care so much that you wouldn't be physically attracted if I was a cis guy. I'd be like, well he knows me and I know him, we like each other, and if we get to add freaky sex to the mixture it's a win-win.

Because misgendering is more about dehumanizing. The need to reduce me to my physical body. Somehow?

Anyways I'm literally rambling and I'm being embarrassing all over your inbox, sorry ^^""

Anyways uhhh. Keep swimming, little shark. I will shut up, sorry

Honestly these discussions just make me want to abolish gender. Everyone should just be attracted to whoever and have consensual relations with whoever :3

In the meantime I’ll keep trying to be as good an ally as I can be

[fleshengine]

Woah you look really good on your tummy Tuesday post, how long have you been on HRT and when did you start if it's okay to ask? :0

:P that's a lil personal but I'll talk about it, my story's kind of unique so I think people should hear it. Also this was originally just one giant block of brain-dump text but I decided to split it up a lil, you're welcome.

I've been really trans since I was a kid. Like my sister used to dress me up in her clothes and princess outfits and stuff and parade me around while calling me a feminine version of my name. Which sounds like bullying but like I loved it, so... I also did the classic "play a game and make your player character a girl" thing that a lot of transfems do. I played Halo Reach with my dad (love him btw) and would make my custom Noble Six a woman. There was a bunch of other little things like that, but you get the gist. I also used to pretend to be a girl and got groomed on omegle but that's a different story.

So I came out when I was like 13 or something and my parents were that kind of supportive where they use your pronouns but want you to wait a year before getting on hormones. So I think I was like 14-15ish when I finally got on E (because when we started it then took a while to get on it horray for fucking bone scans). In the time between I came out and finally got a histreline implant and E my voice dropped a ton and my shoulders filled out and I grew a fucken adam's apple. I was on sublingual pills for a couple months but they sort of gave me massive mood swings and I turned into a giant bitch so my parents and I decided I should switch to patches.

Pills gave me a decent amount of breast growth and it was pretty awesome but patches slowed that down. (I didn't really notice at the time but nerve remapping also happened and now my dick doesn't work right lol.) It's probably something with my skin or whatever, but patches just did not work for me and while I was on them I saw very very little development. It didn't help that they were an absolute pain in the ass, would get sticky and leave gunk on me and also come off in the shower sometimes. I've heard they work for some people but they were not the right fit for me. It doesn't help that during that time I started to struggle a lot with internalized transmisogyny and also a sort of... trauma based aversion to femininity?

So I made the kind of stupid decision to just... quit E and detransition to be nonbinary. No hate to people who detransition, or enbies, it was just me being a dumb kid again. Thing was I still had a histreline implant in me keeping me from producing T, and I actually got it replaced during this time, so I just had no growth hormone in me. I was Very Androgynous and it was pretty cool to ask people what they thought my agab was. When I met my current roomy and his partner apparently they had an argument where they disagreed on my agab. Which tickled me pink when I learned about it months later. Anyway it really should've been a hint to me that it always pleased me immensely when people thought I was born a girl. Like... I'm genuinely impressed at how unperceptive younger me was about that. You poor little idiot, you like it when people pick up on your feminine traits, go back on E.

It wasn't until the last bit of my second year of college that I started using they/she, I had finally gotten a group of Very Queer friends who supported me and I guess I felt that experimentation would be okay. I also ummm... started being active here on tumblr? Surrounding myself with weird transfems helped me feel more normal about being a weird transfem. So like... thanks girlies :). From there it was a pretty quick pipeline from they/she to she/they to she/her to she/they/it. Honestly the it thing didn't really start as a trans thing, I had a dnd character (that I later realized was a Identity Crisis Character) that went by it/its exclusively and my dm started using it with me outside of dnd and my brain liked it.

Anyway, after some quick phone calls and blood tests and bullshit I got back on E in December of 2023 and I've been on since then. I'm doing injections now and even though they're a little scary I really like them. Oh I also got my histreline implant taken out and I'm on spironolactone now which is fun. Maybe it's because I'm an adult but I find the mood swings lessened as well as the headaches. I've also noticed a decent amount of growth since I started as well as more nerve remapping and I finally have those puffy nips everyone talks about all the time. Currently I think most of the growth is going to making my tits wider as opposed to adding depth, which is fine with me. I really want to get on progesterone so they can grow nice and big, but my old doc said it was a bad idea and we should wait for the early structuring to finish because starting prog too early can cause nip deformities. My new doc has no comment because I haven't talked to her yet lmao.

Anyway that's where I am rn. Got my E raised again a couple weeks ago >:) Thanks for asking, sorry if this is rambly. My journey of self discovery had an entire death and rebirth like I'm a hero or some shit.

[alexawynters]

Question to the trans men out there, I am in need of some advice, please!!!

(People from home I think I cleared you out but if I missed you and you see this post - no you didnt)

So this is probably weird and please don't judge me, but.. how did you always know you were a guy? How did you know, did you feel like you were trapped in the wrong body, or were there other clues?

Just asking because.. well.. just for some background, I am afab lesbian, but when I was little my daycare once asked me which Disney character I'd like to be and I apparently said "Aladdin ", and I think about that a lot.

I also think about how I always felt wrong growing up, and then I learned about lesbians and I thought "oh I'm not in the wrong body, I'm just a lesbian".

But.. I don't know? Haha. Weird. My friends say I'm way too feminine in my mannerisms to ever be a dude the few times I've jokingly brought it up. Not sure if that's just the patriarchy and toxic masculinity or if they're right and I'm just super confused lol 🙃 I will absolutely give them that I do have what are considered to be feminine mannerisms and I am absolutely very in touch with my emotions (I will cry at the drop of a hat - I'm squishy, don't yell at me).

I've always been friends with girls, I've always liked/loved girls. I know for a fact I'm attracted to women, and I'm not overly fond of men. The few male friends I have are usually trans men, or gay men, but even they are few and far between.

I love video games, I love adventurous things like horse back riding or going to the shooting range, but I also love when my girl friends want to come spill the tea, I get super giddy, like come on girrrlll, spill! He said wHAT?! The AUDACITY!

But also I hate my body. Total body dysmorphia, I cry and vomit when I have to look in the mirror too long. To be clear this is not just because I am over weight although that certainly doesn't help. My tits are DDD and I mean they're fantastic if I wanna wear a blouse (barf), but if I wanna wear a t-shirt it makes like this weird shelf I hate it.

I look at men's bodies, even those not super fit, and I'm envious. The jaw, the shoulders. The fit of the clothes, ughhh I wish my clothes fit ME like that! I've tried! Multiple exercises, I've seen masc women say get rid of your curves to help build that physique but it never seems to do the job. Everyone compliments me on my highly hourglass figure. I hate it.

I see tiktok and Tumblr posts of trans men who are almost fully transitioned, and they look so happy in themselves, so confident. They look like how *I* want to look.

Growing up, any time I tried to wear anything I felt remotely comfortable in, my mother would say I looked like a "dyker-biker" (wtf even is that insult, mom???). Which isn't inherently anything bad, but the way she said it always made me feel like I should be ashamed, so I feel like I learned to avoid wearing the clothes I actually wanted to wear.

I hate dresses and skirts. I don't care what temperature it is outside. I would rather die than wear either. Shorts, pants, or nothing.

I've sort of tried to broach the topic with friends as I mentioned, and they always say I'm too feminine, or I would have to be gay (no offense men, no thank you). Don't get me wrong our entire friend group is queer lf some sort with the exception of two token straight friends, so the topic should be safe with them if I qanted to bring it up more seriously. But the brushing it off has me terrified. They used to talk about a former friend of ours for example when we were in college and you know figuring ourselves out, who used to waffle between their identity and we all (I'm ashamed to say I went along eith it) said they were just doing it for the attention or to go with the flavor of the month.

Well.. I don't want them to think that about me. Karma is a bitch haha. Especially not my best friend. She's been my best friend for almost two decades, we've had ups and downs, we've grown, we've been through everything together. She's like my sister. I don't know what I would do if I figured this out, made some decision, and lost her because of it.

I know that's doing her and our friendship a disservice, we have grown, we aren't in hs or college anymore. She is the most caring and understanding person I've ever met, but I'm so, so scared.

That's not even to speak of my family. My mother took twenty five years to properly accept that I'm gay. She nearly crashed the car when I first came our (not my best timing tbf). My mother and I have finally made great strides in repairing our relationship, I'm not sure I want to rock the boat with even trying to figure this out.

I thought when I moved from Mississippi to Denver that I would leave everything and everyone behind and start over completely so I could figure this out. That didn't happen because life is fucking expensive and I ended up moving with some friends back home, I haven't really made any new friends and I certainly haven't let go of the old. I'm terrified to explore any of this, but I'm so tired of feeling miserable and not feeling like I'm myself. I don't know who that person is yet but I'm 34 and I want to finally finally figure that out and then be them.

So I guess I'm wondering, how do you know? How do you know who you are? And is it possible that I could just be a straight man in a woman's body? While still maintaining my mannerisms? Or maybe I'm just supposed to be a butch 'bean? But that doesn't feel right either. Idk lol pls send help haha I'm not crying while I write this or anything it's fine.

Also sorry this is all over the place.

[cordycepsfem]

Pageboy Reviews

Spending a bit too much time on Facebook today, apparently, because I saw a question pop up that was answered by one of my friends.

The question:

Out of curiosity, what were the main reasons people rated Pageboy so low? Was it the lack of editing and his privilege?

As radblr's foremost self-appointed Pageboy reader and chronicler, the "lack of editing" hit with resounding truth, the "privilege" made me laugh. EP is a female person in a world that hates them, in a world where she's been raped, assaulted, sexually harassed, lived through abuse, an eating disorder, and so many horrible things that I have to read the book a chapter or two at a time, but sure, that's privilege, because she's white and identifies as a man and is wealthy because she works in entertainment.

Someone in the comments responding to this question suggested that the OP take a look at GoodReads to find out why people didn't like the book and WOW was that a fantastic idea.

many people said the non-cohesiveness of the story was a problem (same)

many people said it felt weird to have a half-baked memoir by someone in their thirties (more or less the words they used; same)

someone said they LOVED the Canadian history parts which is like, Did you? Did you not want to learn Canadian history from a better book about actual Canadian history?

"Maybe in another 10 - 15 years this book will be worth telling."

"The chapters and stories were pretty jumbled up and all over the place. He definitely holds some rage from his lived experience, and rightly so, but the experience as a reader got haggard pretty quick."

Let's pour one out for the GoodReads reviewer who believes trans identities involve more introspection than passing feelings about clothes and stereotypes. RIP, wish I was them.

I never thought "too much homophobia" would be a thing, but you know what, I also agree. So little joy, so much homophobia.

Thank you for your service, T. A+ review.

Even grading with special points "because trans," the book is still terrible. A+ review, Jackson.

This was an eyeroller of a review. EP is "privileged" because her writing sounds like a "white male." (I have obviously not gotten to the Kate Mara chapters in my review yet so no clue how it turns out but my guess is it's as badly/well-written as the rest of the book.)

And her book coming out when it did was a grab for money and also putting down "more important queer memoirs" (like who, Sarah Bailey? like who?). All these people are so up their own asses about advocacy and "elevating" others - elevating others often means at the expense of putting someone down.

A+ work, mostly for introducing the concept of a "whiny memoir" to me, which I appreciate.

And finally, this review knocks it out of the park and really captures a lot of my distaste with what I've read and reviewed so far:

[frostbite-the-bat]

I GET WHAT YOU MEAN ABOUT THE PERIDOT THING. I used to roleplay her on animal jam and it literally changed my identity forever gaga me loved her so much

THATS SO BASED LIKE?? SHE FR CHANGED ME AS WELL BUT OK THIS GONNA BE A LONG ONE ILL USE THIS TIME TO RAMBLE

OK BUT NO LIKE i grew up with steven universe like i got into it in s1 like shoooortly before jailbreak and all that stuff. but i wasn't THAT into it until we got more peridot centric episodes in season 2 and i instantly just became really attached to her

i'd always call her just like me and i'd draw her on my stuff sometimes and even draw my sona dressed in themed clothing after peridot and my old discord name even WAS peridot. i'd even pick up things she does and you fucking know i'd go around going "nye hehehehehehe!!" like her laugh. i even painted a triangular rock to look like peridot and sometimes when i felt bad i'd sit down on my bed and pretend i am chatting with peridot bc i didn't trust to open up to people :sob:

and also for a while i genuinely fictionkined her hard but i don't really kin like that anymore despite my Wonderful Undescribed Nonhuman Status. gotta love those 2016 questioning days. was something

but like, steven universe made me not only realize i am queer (and undertale also) but it also opened my eyes to neurodivergent communities. i didn't know what was wrong with me aside from having an adhd diagnosis. and like. i always related to peridot and what she does and she experiences. then i heard people headcanoning her as autistic aside from aroace (WHICH MEANT A LOT TO ME TOO BECAUSE I AM AROACE AND GREW UP AROACE. I HAD NO OTHER REP. I WAS SO HAPPY THERE WAS A CHARACTER WHO JUST "WASNT INTO IT" I FELT SO SEEN.)

and i was like huh autism i keep hearing its a bad thing but these people are nice. its similar to what i experience.

so i begin learning more about that. and i learn more about myself. and i stop being as hard to myself, because i finally understood a bit of "what was wrong with me" i just grew up completely untreated with anything in a horrible school system that just... made me give up on everything. but this gave me hope!! i knew there was people like me and i knew there were explanations! it wasnt because i was a bad person!! it was because i was just different!!

and even if i didn't know many people like me - i had a character to relate to who followed me through this journey. and it was peridot!!

she's just. herself. and she isn't punished or hated for it! and that meant a lot to me.

i would have probably discovered these things myself anyway - but not as early and not in the same way if it wasn't for me just seeing myself in peridot and liking her a whole lot. her confidence n just being her "weird" self just made me feel seen and welcome. i do that i am weird!! yes!!!!!!!!!!! HISSING AT PEOPLE REPRESENTATIOUN