#I love them so much man this cured my art block

[espikola]

[separatist-apologist]

Do you have any recs for Feysand-like characters romance but healthier? I love them but I love the wholesome parts of them so so much more and it would be nice to enjoy them in a sweeter setting. I will take books/shows, even movie works but not my favourite option.

It's fine if you don't have any. Thanks anyways.

I consulted my feysand experts (@thesistersarcheron, @rosanna-writer, @octobers-veryown, @kataravimes-of-the-shire, @velidewrites, and @reverie-tales - this is what everyone came up with) (under cut due to length):

One Dark Window by Rachel Gillig (duology, complete):

Elspeth needs a monster. The monster might be her.

Elspeth Spindle needs more than luck to stay safe in the eerie, mist-locked kingdom of Blunder—she needs a monster. She calls him the Nightmare, an ancient, mercurial spirit trapped in her head. He protects her. He keeps her secrets.

But nothing comes for free, especially magic.

When Elspeth meets a mysterious highwayman on the forest road, her life takes a drastic turn. Thrust into a world of shadow and deception, she joins a dangerous quest to cure Blunder from the dark magic infecting it. And the highwayman? He just so happens to be the King’s nephew, Captain of the most dangerous men in Blunder…and guilty of high treason.

Together they must gather twelve Providence Cards—the keys to the cure. But as the stakes heighten and their undeniable attraction intensifies, Elspeth is forced to face her darkest secret yet: the Nightmare is slowly taking over her mind. And she might not be able to stop him.

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by Victoria E. Schwab:

France, 1714: in a moment of desperation, a young woman makes a Faustian bargain to live forever and is cursed to be forgotten by everyone she meets.

Thus begins the extraordinary life of Addie LaRue, and a dazzling adventure that will play out across centuries and continents, across history and art, as a young woman learns how far she will go to leave her mark on the world.

But everything changes when, after nearly 300 years, Addie stumbles across a young man in a hidden bookstore and he remembers her name.

Unsteady by Peyton Corinne:

Rhys Koteskiy is back — at least, he's supposed to be.

During last year’s Frozen Four, the Waterfell University hockey captain, and NHL legacy, took a brutal hit that left him with a concussion and a new discomfort on the ice. Plagued by nightmares and panic attacks every time he attempt to skate, Rhys wonders if he’ll ever play again — if he’ll ever want to.

Sadie Brown is staying focused this semester — no matter what.

Currently drowning in debt, custody hearings for her younger brothers and skating practices, she's just trying to make it to the next day. A spitfire figure skater known for her bad attitude and frequent disappearing acts, she has a reputation on campus. And it’s not a pretty one.

When she accidentally witnesses one of the golden boy hockey captain’s panic attacks and attempts to help him, a strange sort of understanding strikes up between them.

No questions asked. Just comfort.

But Rhys finds himself drawn to Sadie. Where he feels empty, a shell of the man and player he was before, Sadie is so full of everything it bursts from her; every emotion she feels seems like it’s blasted at max. Rhys is desperate to feel anything, Sadie wants to stop feeling so much.

But healing doesn’t mix with secrets, and they’re both skating a thin line, unsteady .

Red String Theory by Lauren Kung Jessen:

 When it comes to love and art, Rooney Gao believes in signs. Most of all, she believes in the Chinese legend that everyone is tied to their one true love by the red string of fate. And that belief has inspired her career as an artist, as well as the large art installations she makes with ( obviously ) red string. That is until artist’s block strikes and Rooney begins to question everything. But then fate leads her to the perfect guy . . . Jack Liu is perfect. He’s absurdly smart, successful, handsome, and after one enchanting New York night—under icy February skies and fueled by fried dumplings—all signs point to destiny. Only Jack doesn’t believe. And after their magical date, it looks like they might be lost to each other forever . . . until they’re given one more chance to reconnect. But can Rooney convince a reluctant skeptic to take a leap of fate?

Neon Gods by Katee Robert:

He was supposed to be a myth. But from the moment I crossed the River Styx and fell under his dark spell... he was, quite simply, mine.

Society darling Persephone Dimitriou plans to flee the ultra-modern city of Olympus and start over far from the backstabbing politics of the Thirteen Houses. But all that’s ripped away when her mother ambushes her with an engagement to Zeus, the dangerous power behind their glittering city’s dark facade.

With no options left, Persephone flees to the forbidden undercity and makes a devil’s bargain with a man she once believed a myth... a man who awakens her to a world she never knew existed.

Hades has spent his life in the shadows, and he has no intention of stepping into the light. But when he finds that Persephone can offer a little slice of the revenge he’s spent years craving, it’s all the excuse he needs to help her—for a price. Yet every breathless night spent tangled together has given Hades a taste for Persephone, and he’ll go to war with Olympus itself to keep her close…

A modern retelling of Hades and Persephone that’s as sinful as it is sweet.

The Magician's Guild (Black Magician's Trilogy) by Trudi Canavan:

"We should expect this young woman to be more powerful than our average novice, possibly even more powerful than the average magician."

This year, like every other, the magicians of Imardin gather to purge the city of undesirables. Cloaked in the protection of their sorcery, they move with no fear of the vagrants and miscreants who despise them and their work-—until one enraged girl, barely more than a child, hurls a stone at the hated invaders...and effortlessly penetrates their magical shield.

What the Magicians' Guild has long dreaded has finally come to pass. There is someone outside their ranks who possesses a raw power beyond imagining, an untrained mage who must be found and schooled before she destroys herself and her city with a force she cannot yet control.

Hoarded by the Dragon by Lillian Lark:

A thief doing a final job and the dragon caught in a precarious situation that changes both of their lives.

He’s powerful and wealthy and he hates me.

But I have something he wants.

It wasn’t a part of the plan.

I’m the thief stupid enough to break into a dragon’s hoard… and walk away pregnant with his baby.

An Enchantment of Ravens by Margaret Rogerson:

With a flick of her paintbrush, Isobel creates stunning portraits for a dangerous set of clients: the fair folk. These immortal creatures cannot bake bread or put a pen to paper without crumbling to dust. They crave human Craft with a terrible thirst, and they trade valuable enchantments for Isobel’s paintings. But when she receives her first royal patron—Rook, the autumn prince—Isobel makes a deadly mistake. She paints mortal sorrow in his eyes, a weakness that could cost him his throne, and even his life.

Furious, Rook spirits Isobel away to his kingdom to stand trial for her crime. But something is seriously amiss in his world, and they are attacked from every side. With Isobel and Rook depending upon each other for survival, their alliance blossoms into trust, perhaps even love . . . a forbidden emotion that would violate the fair folks’ ruthless laws, rendering both their lives forfeit. What force could Isobel's paintings conjure that is powerful enough to defy the ancient malice of the fairy courts?

Isobel and Rook journey along a knife-edge in a lush world where beauty masks corruption and the cost of survival might be more frightening than death itself.

Desire In His Blood by Zoey Draven:

Gemma Hara is drowning under the weight of her father’s debts. Working herself to the bone, she knows that if she doesn’t pay them off in time, the sadistic creditors will take everything: their home, their respected name, and, worst of all, her two beautiful sisters.

To save her family, Gemma agrees to do something reckless: marry a wealthy and mysterious stranger, who offers her a wicked bargain she can’t afford to refuse.

However, his bargain comes with one terrifying catch. Because her husband-to-be is a Kylorr.

One of the most fearsome alien races in the Four Quadrants, the Kylorr are beastly monsters, all muscle and menace, with powerful wings, depraved cravings, and berserker-like rages. The worst part?

They survive on blood.

Cold and cruel, Azur of House Kaalium, the High Lord of Laras, demands Gemma as his blood bride. To feed from her. To use her body in whatever way he wishes. For paying off her family’s debts, he expects her complete submission.

What neither of them predicts is how his bite doesn’t bring pain—it fills Gemma with more exquisite pleasure than she’s ever known. And as she finds her footing on a strange new planet, the one thing Gemma thought she’d never surrender might be at risk after all.

Her heart.

Too bad her new husband can’t seem to decide if he wants to break it…or keep it forever.

Master of Crows by Grace Draven:

This is the question that sets bondwoman, Martise of Asher, on a dangerous path. In exchange for her freedom, she bargains with her masters, the mage-priests of Conclave, to spy on the renegade sorcerer, Silhara of Neith. The priests want Martise to expose the sorcerer's treachery and turn him over to Conclave justice. A risky endeavor, but one she accepts without hesitation--until she falls in love with her intended target.

Silhara of Neith, Master of Crows, is a desperate man. The god called Corruption invades his mind, seducing him with promises of limitless power if he will help it gain dominion over the world. Silhara struggles against Corruption's influence and searches for ways to destroy the god. When Conclave sends Martise as an apprentice to help him, he knows she's a spy. Now he fights a war on two fronts -against the god who would possess him and the apprentice who would betray him.

Mage and spy search together for a ritual that will annihilate Corruption, but in doing so, they discover secrets about each other that may damn them both. Silhara must decide if his fate, and the fate of nations, is worth the soul of the woman he has come to love, and Martise must choose continued enslavement or freedom at the cost of a man's life. And love.

[viperbunnies]

𓍯𓂃𓏧♡ Have you heard of the moon's rabbit?

Nyallo and welcome to the blog~I go by Tato/Tater or Yu whichever you prefer, also I use they/them pronouns. Welcome to my art blog/twst blog. I'll be posting and archiving most of my art, wips, doodles here, reblogging some art that i like. I'm quite shy but please don't hesitate to drop something in my ask! I try to answer if it doesn't overwhelm me. I mainly be moots with ppl I see interacting with me :>

ART ONLY ACCOUNT: @vbpotaters

Do not repost my art or use for A*i learning! Don't forget your daily clicks: https://arab.org/click-to-help/palestine/

Art Masterlist: here! Barren dump acc: @viperbnuy Strawpage (small summary): https://viperbunnies.straw.page/ Current status: Freedom but at what cost ๋࣭݁ ⭑.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ONGOING EVENT: Oc Ask Game!

[BYF + TAGS + MORE INFO BELOW]

Read BYF: - This blog will be SFW, and while I am an adult I'd much rather if you don't send me NSFW asks. - DNI if you: ship Inc3st/Minors with adults, support A*i art, L0licon/sh0tacon, or fall under any of these. - This blog isn't spoiler-free. If you do not wish to see any spoilers block/filter the tag #spoilers / #twst jp - While my main fandom is TWST as of the moment-- Please do expect that there will be some posts from other fandoms as well. - English is not my first language + I'm neurodivergent, there may be times where I might misinterpret your statement-- clarify it to me gently if i do!

ASKS ARE OPEN - All my social media are linked on my strawpage, if it's not there it's not mine. - DMS are closed to avoid bot mails, but Mutuals are always free to dm me here (Or ask for my Discord handle if you want to chat!) - I don't mind tags especially from moots! May it be for tag games or something that you think I'd like, feel free to tag me. - I don't mind if you make content featuring my OCs, given that it's done respectfully and SFW. I always appreciate everyone's efforts hehe :>

More about me- - I'm tater! I'm an INFP and Filipino, currently in my last year of Univ so I'm quite busy now (and will be busier in the future) My timezone is GMT+8 but I'm sometimes awake at questionable hours. I like the color blue a lot, and make a lot of OCs. - My love language is gift giving, I do a lot of arts for friends and people I vibe with :3 (Btw please don't feel pressured to give me anything in return! really just interacting with ya'll is enough for me!) - I also don't mind sharing F/Os!

What to expect from my blog? - Lots of Jamil Viper art, that man cures my artblock and is the main driving force for my art. He is my muse, and I enjoy analyzing his character a lot. - Yumeship/Selfship/Oc x Canon content ! I reblog a lot of yumes from mutuals, and do some yumeship art as well. - Art style practices? My style fluctuates a lot, partly due to me forgetting what brushes I last used and also cause I don't enjoy sticking to one style.

TAGS

Art related: #Taters doodles - My art tag #Taters fave - Art I'm particularly proud of #Mashed tater - Style experiments/ Art studies / Practices #Taters kid - Personal art of my Original Characters #Viper sightings - Miniseries of Jamil doodles. #Taters inspos - Stuff that I look back on when I need some inspiration

OC / OC x Canon ship related: -> OC MASTERLIST - (WIP) #Oz Damarys - My main twst oc #Ozml - Main tag for my Jamil yumeship (mute it if you want) #AuroraVoid - Main tag for my Silver yumeship #Croccymouse - Main tag for my Yuu and Sebek ship #RiverofMementos - Tag for my Clyde & Idia platonic ship #StripesNClaws - Tag for my Kaden & Leona platonic/familial ship

Miscellaneous: #Taters yap - Some yap session, can be irl or fandom related. #Taters misc - random things, varying from pet photos to etc #Taters straw - Findings from my strawpage #Taters gaming - Gameplay from the many games i play x.x # (Moot's name)tot - Mutuals!

#Taters treasure box - Gifts from others!

[bluebellwrenart]

CoD OC Dump #1 - [Black Ops Edition]

Decided to cure my art block by doodling all of my OCs so that I have an excuse to talk about them. Started off with my many CoD characters, so here's the first set. Names and info under the cut.

[Goes upper right -> lower left -> upper middle -> lower middle]

Joanne Locklear — Because not everyone has to be the most epic soldier or spy to ever soldier or spy, Joanne is one of my civilian characters.

A med-student with a clinical interest in neurology (and a personal/non-professional interest in psychology) only partly because of her husband (drumroll, please), Alex Mason. She's my OC version of Mason's wife.

Her parents own and run a bar & grill in Fairbanks, where she works part-time when she's not busy with school, and her father happened to have grown up and served in World War II alongside Mason's father. They were friends because they were the same age, they were classmates, and also because when they were little their dads made them. She's half-Alaskan Athabaskan through her mom, half-white through her dad.

Lillian Scott — An analyst in the CIA with a specialty in linguistics and a knack for codes as well, her main role in my fanfic series is to serve as a translator, gather intelligence, analyze said intelligence, and so on and so forth. She serves a mainly supporting role as far as operations are concerned, and she's fine with that. After all she is a scrawny little nerd (affectionate) and although she can fight if necessary she isn't exactly great at it. It's too much for her poor constitution.

A fun fact is that she can actually shoot really well (girl is Appalachian born and raised, she grew up hunting, what did you expect) it just hurts her hands and she kind of needs those. Also she's paired with Weaver because if you know me then you know that I love me a man with an eyepatch and a tragic complex backstory.

Nadezhda "Bell" Belkina — An OC!Bell because you can't give me a faceless protagonist and expect me NOT to make a very long and intricate backstory for them (if you know about my AC fanfics then you know exactly what I'm talking about). Abandoned on the streets, taken in by Perseus, something of a prodigy, then brainwashed by Adler through the MKUltra program...you know how it be.

She and Woods end up bonding over the fact they both spent their childhoods on the streets.

Claire Anderson & Michael Isaacs — AKA Svetlana Andreyeva and Mikhail Isakov, both KGB operatives planted in the U.S. to assume American identities, their job was primarily to track down and kill rogue operatives/traitors. The problem with that is that both of them ended up really liking their fake lives in America, and were tempted to defect. Claire defected to the CIA, Mike/Misha was killed before he could. By Russell Adler no less.

Oh, and speaking of him, Claire is his ex-wife. She wasn't his ex until after he shot Mikhail, though. And then tried to shoot her too. Yeah, you can see why their marriage went up in flames. Somehow they worked out their problems enough to work together in the 80s...and again in the 90s. RIP Mikhail though.

[demvalhaken]

Dear god, am I late for a Pride Month post lol

This is Bevel Stingheart and Queen Snow! They are married, let me emphasise IT IS A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP!!!

My favourite lesbeans. Bevel is Snow’s super cool awesome strong beautiful wife and Snow is Snow. I love them so much!!!

Snow is an albino because I thought it was cool, she is quite literally the only one alive right now (It’s really super rare)

I FINALLY HAD A GOOD ART DAY

Why do they have three things in their eyes, well bug. HERES SOME DOODLES WITH SOME AMAZING WORDS BY THE ONE AND ONLY DEM

Btw in the second image… I can just imagine Bevel calling Snow a passenger princess…. it was a very random thought…

“The woman face to my man face” - Dem’s 264th brain cell, 2024

Bevel is the man face and Snow is the woman face, it’s very poetic and inspiring 😔

TOP SECRET LORE REVEAL?!?!?! Angy Snow grrrr (Actually it’d be buzzing because they’re Wasps….)

OLD BEVEL DESIGN REVEAL?!?! It still fits her personality btw

Me when I see this (It’s the wallpaper on my Ipad)

WAHHHHHHHHHHH- (I need more Bevel content for my addiction)

I’ve been cured of thine blocking of the practice of art

Love you guys… QUICK QUIRKY QUIZ?!

(I loved making this post)

[rubykgrant]

RvB Fusion AU? Caboose and Grif becoming like a fun lazy guy, Tucker and Kai becoming THE sex-crave fusion, Sarge and Carolina becoming the most competitive fighter ever, etc.

Oh man... there have been a lot of fun RVB Fusion AU scenarios people have come up with through the years... I think Kai and Tucker fused would weirdly sort of balance both their two extreme flirty attitudes, and they are somehow SUPREMELY charismatic in an effortless way (like, they aren't even TRYING to flirt with anybody, and don't even notice all the heart-eyes. they're also really funny and giggly and affectionate, but in a relaxed way). Caboose and Grif fusion is super chill, but also? They have all of Caboose's weird, reality-bending concepts, and Grif's gift with words, so they're just there being all philosophical, possibly unlocking the secrets of the universe. Carolina and Sarge is BEYOND competitive (and has the same attitude of Aqua from Brave and the Bold; very valiant and enjoys the thrill of battle! unless you tick them off, then it is just. a massacre).

Church and Caboose fusion is a fun one, because Church has to like... come to terms with "loving himself", not in a false-bravado/ego-trip way, but actually having good self-esteem? They also freely share how much they love everybody else, but still has Church's potty-mouth. Everybody thought they should worry about a Tex and Carolina fusion, but again, they are just sort of balanced out somehow? Simmons and Church fusions is sooooooooo smug. Any fusion with Doc means they also have O'Malley in there... Kai and Doc genuinely have a lot of fun fused, and the result is a such a subtle smart-mouth sense of humor, enhanced by O'Malley being their "anger translator". Donut and Simmons fused is sort of a mess... all of Simmons' anxiety makes Donut ACUTELY aware of his own insecurities, and they just keep over-apologizing for everything. Wash always thinks he won't "mix well" with somebody when fused, and it is true that a fusion with him will like- just start crying at some point, because it is like having an internal conversation where one gives the other a chance to open up. Yeah, even Sarge. In fact, Sarge and Wash seems to have all the serious/professionalism of both, but will just give out very deeply emotional compliments to the others, said with a calm matter-of-fact tone. Kai and Carolina is TERROR, just full-on rebel, with the muscle to back it up. Tucker and Donut is the most prettiest and flamboyant fusion.

Oh, and I can't talk about RVB fusions without showing some of the awesome art by @creatrixanimi !

[masked-and-doomed]

NEW ME NEW INTRO!!

Hello, I'm Kat/Kats (or Yomotsu), welcome!! I am so normal about my boyfriends.

Please feel free to ask me about my OC, UG!! Hell, even cooler if you do it in a roleplay kinda way.

Other places you can find me:

@katsdoodles - art blog/archive.

Discord: thatonekats

👆 just in case. Tumblr explodes. Talk to me if you wanna ig (I am not good at conversing. So. Keep that in mind.)

Ao3: ThatOneKat2

👆 Might as well have it here. I've been more in a writing mood this year.

Twitter: @ThatOneKats

I have a twitter now I fucking guess. A bit of bonus content there (a little bit more of unhinged thoughts) but you're not missing much if you don't go there.

UG RP twt: @LIBRARIAMYLAMB

If you wanna see little bits of UG musing about go there.

--

Suspected BPD, have been diagnosed autistic. You may see vent posts. Every now and then. Check the tagging system to block em out.

I am deeply in love and sickly affectionate for my 4 darlings. They're my boyfriends, girlfriends, besties- our relationship? Is uhh whatever man. It's love. It's love.

First two being Yomotsu Hirasaka (pfp), and Takao Hiyama. They are my most intense hyperfixation of 2 years.! They are from Mirai Nikki/Future Diary. An anime/manga which I don't really like.

The next beloved is Pocketcat! He is from Fear and Hunger. He's. A silly :) There's so much intrigue of him aaaghhh ough he is so sad.

Last one !! Faust. From Guilty Gear. He's a. He's somebody. Got him on Valentine's Day. He makes me a different kind of ill. Alas, this doctor cannot cure me.

They're 💙 just like me fr. I love them. URL is them btw. Masked men, doomed.

(comfortable with sharing and gushing together with everyone. I don't mind if you send or @ me in stuff that has Faust shipped with someone, (I like appreciating art of Faust in any form :] ) just know I'm uncomfy with all (canon x canon) Faust ships except Happy Chaos, meaning that I won't talk about them (eg., fau.slayer) together.)

I am. Also obsessed with my lambs as well. (The Conclave, consisting of Axus, Libraria, Baldias, and Chronus) They mean a lot to me. I wish to give them happiness they didn't have the time nor place for. You will see me reblog lambs and tag it as them. Feel free to send me lamb pictures, effectively beaming Conclave to me.

NOTE! I do sometimes post about needing my darlings to kill themselves, or wish great harm upon them. I will not always have positive things to say about them. I am a hater as much as I am a lover. (Not the "I want him dead" (lovingly) (though I do have sadism and would enjoy killing them for the fun of it), I have genuine hatred towards them all (Excluding Libraria) and I loathe their existence.

(if I had to guess, this is the bpd doing its thing)

--

Yayaya tagging system time!

#ah rambling - general yapping tag

#[MN/funger] rambling - ramblings of MN or funger

#[MN/funger] bangers - memes/shitposts of that fandom

#oc time - posts about the little OCs I have (currently empty. DW about it)

#unnamed girlie - posts about my self insert. (UG for short)

#UG spoilers - in case you wanna go through the UG tag but not be spoiled about the endings and such.

#guy in my head - headcanon posts

#doodle tag - stuff not high effort enough to put into my art blog goes here

#reblog moment - reblogs! So you can filter them out

#lovesick - yandere / obsessive behaviour

#gatito - kitty tag.

#belalang beloveds - grasshopper tag. Belalang is grasshopper in Malay :)

#art save - images I wanna draw (typically memes I wanna draw with my guys)

#art reference material - reblogs of posts with helpful art stuff

#general reference material - reblogs of posts with whatever that isn't art. Not really 'general' perse but I don't have another word

#epic meowtual art - art by the meowtuals!

#ask game - reblogs of ask game posts

#ask game answer - answers to asks abt the ask game

#hello asker - ask tag

#tag game - reblog of posts that are meant to have you tag other ppl to continue the chain

#negative. And #/negative are used for vent posts. Make those sometimes.

#hxrny aroace on main - (mind the x) epic posts where I feel feelings for some characters (carnally)

#fanfic shit idfk - when I post about my fanfiction. (Used to be for talking abt fanfic I'm reading, older posts like that still have this tag)

#girl what you on?? - posts where I'm in some sort of delirium, talking to my beloveds. And being ill about them.

#shit I send to fictional guy - posts I'd send to fictional characters. Will prob have their name tagged too.

#unnamed oc core - wow it's just like him fr. Many things will be tagged this btw. They are not okay. (Same person as UG jsyk)

#pocketkitty - for posts I don't want in the pocket.cat tag or reblogging posts that are like pocket.cat. (only applies to him everyone else gets tagged with their name in posts that are like them)

#robot nephew - similar to pocketkitty just that it's. Mr robo.t K.y

#silly doctor man - I fell into gui.lty g.ear and now I'm in love with this bozo. When I don't want it to be in the main tag. Yes like pocketkitty and robo bo.

#mister omelette - guy that asks which came first the chicken or the egg. Answers himself, it's omelette.

#mask quartet - fucking stupid masked bitches trying to save humanity gone wrong

#spoon cloak - that fucking mantis that I hate

Liveblog tags:

Guilty gear: #pride in my gears: sign, #pride in my gears: rev, #pride in my gears: overture, #pride in my gears: strive

Bleach anime: #not drinking bleach (from Arrancar arc and onwards)

--

Tag me in stuff you think I like!! I don't mind! Or like tag games.

There's also a side blog. For degenerate thoughts of mine. If you want it just give a DM ig. (On the harder and disturbing side of kinks though, so warning) (also sometimes post my own drawn pornography there)

--

Pictures i want here

(This applies mostly to Faust. Sorry not sorry Faust. I will give you the worst horrors.)

(This is me any time someone mentions Conclave. I wish I could say I was exaggerating. I'll just say that Conclave has spiked my libido and I've been the fastest to draw suggestive art of them and write smut of them than of any other character I've fallen in love with. I need them carnally. And I tell you, it is a need.)

(Sure yeah blinky. Conclave. My beloveds.)

[the-kr8tor]

I've been writing so much tonight that my finger's are cramping up in the double jointed way and I'm listening to the sauciest, most diabolical jaw-dropping, toe-curling, the father the son and the holy spirit amen-needing songs but WE PERSIST. Daily Hobie HC! I love the art of Hobie you get for your fics- they're crunchy and tasty and I love them. Hobie was always mesmerized by the way your art seemed to be so captivating, yet you were always able to find things you don't like about it. Whenever you tried to even nitpick ever so slightly about your art, Hobie would hold a hand over your mouth, whispering playfully about how you shouldn't talk badly about something that you spent hours on in case the government finds out, and that's where he knows he loses you due to the absurdity of it all. But, despite you rolling your eyes multiple times at him , he's aware it works wonders as you're no longer hyper-focusing on every little detail of your art and instead just laughing at his creatively worded ramble about government schemes. He always loves to nick (or buy, depending) art supplies and sketchbooks for you, adoring the way your eyes light up at whatever he brings you, whether it be a mechanical pencil which you always gush over what led it is (Hobie is clueless but he likes listening to you), or a new sketchbook with one of those textures on the hardcover which feel nice to run your fingers along. Any time you're doing art, you can't help but use Hobie as a muse. He could be doing anything, and yet you can't help but sketch him out, including his texture and border. Hobie teases you on how he is the perfect remedy for art block, and yet he really is. His textures, borders and colours always make you try something different with how far you can stretch with your style, as if he was perfectly made to be the cure to one of the most frustrating things you have to go through. One thing that usually happens as you're sketching out a picture, this time, a polaroid picture, Hobie will come over and drape himself across your back, burying his face into the back of your neck while his arms tightened around your middle, snuggling into you from behind. Occasionally, he'll look over your shoulder and rest his chin against it, his eyes roaming over your work. He'll sometimes point out things that you might've forgotten, like an extra stud on his choker or the dripping mascara design on his Spider-Man mask. Or, when you ask, he'll suggest things for the background. Certain flowers to frame, or a pattern or just even funny icons. However, you noticed that sometimes, Hobie will toss some crumpled up papers aside with a frustrated sigh, as if he had no idea what to do and was trying to think of something. Once, your curiosity got the better of you, and you took one of these crumpled pieces of paper while Hobie was patrolling. Your heart melted when you saw the chibi drawings that Hobie had doodled representing the two of you. You could see that in corners he was planning out your design, before one being a coloured final. This one, you two were holding hands and smiling at each other, with little scribbly hearts surrounding it. Unravelling the other pieces of paper, you noticed that Hobie had spent a while in figuring out what design best suited you, not wanting to simplify your appearance too much, yet not wanting to complicate it.

He figured that he wanted to leave a bigger gift this time, so why not leave a piece of art? Yet, he was having some trouble over the past few days figuring out a doable design for you. When Hobie came back, he barely noticed that one crumpled paper was missing, while you had already cut the doodle out and hid it in your little memory box, out of Hobie's grasp. Only was it on the anniversary of you two when Hobie finally gifted you the little drawings that he did was when you revealed the one you took. Although he was slightly surprised you paid that much attention, he was happy that you at least enjoyed it much more than he did. For Hobie, that made it all the more worth it. -🐦‍⬛

I'm so jelly rn I wanna write a lot today too! I'm happy that you are writing so much today tho!! ❤️

Daily Hobie HC ‼️‼️‼️

I have such talented and amazing lovelies! I'm not worthy of their talents

HHAHHAHAHAHHAHA he starts to spill out conspiracy theories just to stop u from bringing yourself down

Oh Hobie would have the time of his life (nicking) in one of those bougie art supply stores with the world class stationary!

You are so right! Hobie is the best muse there is! (Stares at my 100+ fics of him)

Lol he's backseat drawing 😂

Aisbwjbswhjs He makes art of you!!! 😍😍😍 Ooh what if he paints like a little chibi version of your face on his guitar! That would be so sweet I'd cry fr 🥹

[b0nelessdoodles]

Art Summary 2023

shoutout to the one month were i drew fanart and then everything else was just dnd content again lmao (also shoutout to me being late to posting this haaaaa)

2023 wasn't the best year for me personally. between money problems and job searching, health issues, mental health issues, unintentional discomfort at my new job, and the overall issues of the world it just hasn't been great and I felt it heavily in my creativity. I never really had any creative highs this year outside of artfight (and even then i felt like i didn't do well) which only fed into some of the issues I was having.

But looking back I am really happy with most of what I made! Sure I didn't draw much but hey I think I popped off when I did!

So here is to 2024! Already off to a good start in the art department and even if I slow down at least I've had fun so far!

(i was gonna put me gushing about things in tags but its a lot so i'm doing a read more this post is already so damn long lmao i'm sorry)

okay i'm here to gush about two pieces at a time and their contents cause then make me happy to look at so lets get started on that with march and september 'cause hey! look at the relationship development of my little goblin guy!

march was when kk (tic's best friend and now boyfriend) first appeared to the rest of the party outside of just tic talking about him. literally the entire party could see that kk was in love with tic and was just like "oh buddy sorry about that" 'cause tic was a dumbass and romance was just never something he thought about until meeting the party. then we flash forward to september where the two confessed to each other after what really felt like the end of tic's story arc. at least it felt that way to me 'cause he reached his goal of killing groll and becoming the king of goblins but i know he still has shit to do I'M LOOKING AT YOU TRAVELLER AND RIP! but yeah that was the whole reason he left and it was done. he did it! but it almost cost him kk and the two ended up having a really important talk about it. kk chewed tic out and spilled his guts and i still think about it a lot holy shit it was so good omfg but it was in that moment that it clicked for tic. that if he had actually lost kk he had no idea what he would do, that he felt like his whole life would fall apart without him. and just man it was good wholesome content. congrats to the goblins for being the first canon relationship! (even tho they were not the first confession that one goes to rhami!)

now that that block of the text is out of the way we get to more depressing ones, those being january and october with my guy, dr. cecil wilfree.

its just.... man. what do i even say about him. january was probably the last moment before his life went into a full downward spiral, eventually leading into his demise. that piece isn't even anything major but rather something like a reminder going "hey, remember when wilfree had two normal eyes? good times!" and just man (-insert that image of a horse standing on the beach-) compare that to where he's at in october and knowing what happened in those 10 months? january he still had trust and hope, he believed that he was going to get back home and help river out with his plague, maybe even get aster home if she'd let them, maybe find a way to cure himself and help casey. but by the end there was no hope and he found out that he had been used, was nothing more than a tool for someone who he trusted, despite knowing that he really shouldn't have. river was dead and it was his fault (at least in his mind it was), he had failed to protect aster and traumatized both her and willow, and he could do nothing to save an entire population from being wiped off the face of the map. and he caved under the guilt. he gave up. its sad to see him alive and pissy in january and then look at december and see a shell of the same man, no more thoughts in that head as his mind got disconnected from his body and self.

and then for extra sads we've got december which was his birth month, so i drew something from a time before the campaign. back when he was alive and well, no soul curse and unknowing of the horrors yet to come, and receiving a gift from someone whose life he could soon destroy due to his own hubris.

anyway! pay no mind to may! i didn't draw a damn thing that whole month!

[roughly6500bees]

hey girlies i have been working on. a horror oc............

tw: body horror, bugs, trypophobia, fire, self harm, death

we follow my guy Mark Warren, who was mercilessly haunted by this mysterious figure as a kid- a walking corpse, full of squirming maggots and centipedes, falling apart, voice a gasp of wet, raspy breathing. whatever it would touch would become infected with this decay, to which the only cure would be to burn the rot out.

this childhood haunting eventually ended with him setting the figure itself on fire, putting it to rest.

(the first drawing of Mark Warren)

now we find him as an adult, married, living a fairly normal life, having mostly tried to block out his childhood encounter with The Bug Man. His mother dies, so he goes back to his childhood home to help pack her stuff and prepare for her funeral. while he’s there, he finds a box of his old stuff, full of charred clothes and singed stuffed animals. and at the bottom of the box, a dead fly. nothing unusual.

this is a very rough concept, very early in development, but basically he starts to find himself transported to what seems to be an alternate version of reality, where his home is full of the same rot and infestations he was haunted by as a child, where he finds versions of his wife mangled and half eaten, rotting but still somehow partially alive, where he finds himself eaten away at while explores the impossible twisting corridors of this ruined house, a distortion of what should have been a comfortable and safe place. other than husks of his loved ones, he is completely alone in this reality, save for a voice that sometimes whispers to him through the flies and cockroaches.

(body horror concept art. corruption avatar looking mf)

the time he spends in the real world is not much kinder. flashes of this other reality seep into what should be his normal life. he’s not sure who he can trust, he’s not quite sure what’s real or not. when he wakes from the other world, he finds himself places he wasn’t before, out in the woods or even just doing something in his house. he always finds himself clutching his lighter, often holding it to his own skin in an attempt to burn out the rot.

at the same time, when he does actually get to sleep, he finds himself in his childhood home, watching his child self go through the first haunt. it doesn’t take long, however, to realize that the creature he had been fighting against all those years ago was him, now. he was the monster in his closet, the creature in the corner of his room. which means that he is the thing that gets burned in the end.

(me playing around with textures and brushes during a concept sketch of Mark’s nightmares)

i really don’t know how ill conclude the story yet. there is. a lot to work on. if i were to break down the concept to purely allegorical parts, i’d say its about how childhood trauma and mental illness can carry on to adult life and you kind of HAVE to deal with it. also in a way about how like. you often make your own memories worse by dwelling on them without trying to resolve and sort of. adding to them in your head. #mentally ill

anyway thanks for readying ♥

[positivelyapunovexponent-good]

Oooh this looks quite fun! I shall partake. I’m also a bit shy about tagging people but anyone who wants to is welcome to join in!

A couple notes on each of my choices because I have much to say about each of them!

Dungeon Meshi is one of the only pieces of media where I cannot pick a favorite character. At all. I love everyone in the main party + Falin and equal amount and agonised over which character to chose for this poll for frankly too long. Finally settled on Senshi because he’s the most iconic

It was also a little difficult to settle on The Archivist as my favorite character in TMA since the supporting characters are so good, but at the end of the day I cannot resist the incompetent asshole academic who is canonically described as a “grubby Jesus”

I have admittedly been somewhat liberal in what I have interpreted a “character” to be, in my inclusion of real life mathematician Paul Erdős in my poll. However, I stand by my decision, as many would describe him as “a character” in the sense he was quite eccentric. If you don’t believe me PLEASE read his Wikipedia page (or at least the ��Personality’ section). Seriously it’s one of the few Wikipedia pages I’ve ever read that’s made me laugh out loud uncontrollably. Also - quirks aside- his mathematical work is very cool too! Look up the Erdos Distance problem if you want somewhere to start- mathematicians continue to be chipping away at it in the decades after Erdos’ death. My research advisor once attracted the attention of airport cops after he started jumping up and down with joy in the terminal upon receiving the news that his colleagues significantly improved the exponent of the Erdos distance problem bound. (Honestly he’s kinda a “character” too. )

Okay I now proceed to get even more liberal with the definition of “character” for the purposes of this poll. In particular, the Fourier characters of the cyclic group G = (Z_n, +) are the star blorbos of my thesis. This is because they are QUITE useful for computing the eigenvalues of the adjacency matrix of any Cayley graph on generating set S of G (specifically, the eigenvalues are the sums of Fourier characters evaluated at each of generators in S). Because they are such blorbos to me and literally called characters, I maintain they deserve a place in a character poll

Okay I finally return to a slightly more… ahem… traditional interpretation of “character” in a fandom context. The fandom in question here is my girlfriend’s D&D campaign, so not much of a broad audience. Which is a shame, because it’s WICKED good. If it was a piece of published media widely consumed on tumblr, the character of Ubiquity in particular would have a firmly cemented status as a tumblr sexyman in the most traditional possible sense. I hate the tragic grease stain of a man so much, but I hate him so affectionately that he’s also my favorite. Anyways, my girlfriend’s campaign has been going for years now, and it is by far the “fandom” I spend the most of my creative energy on thinking about- I could theorise for hours, it singlehandedly cured my art block, and I have multiple dumb AUs living rent free in my mind. All that is to say my girlfriend is an absolute world-building genius and one of my favorite writers

inspired by @1tbls et al— no one tagged me but it seemed fun and I want in

if you want to partake, make a poll with 5 of your favorite characters & tag 5 people

however I get Very Nervous about tagging folks in things like this so if you see this just consider yourself invited to join in

[space-dragon-ace]

Draw me

Pairing: Albedo x Reader Word count: 891 Description: Art block is horrible. Good thing you have the right cure for it Additional info: Inspired by a post by manic-nova Tagging @clouds-rambles; @deadlyboyy; @irethepotato; @manic-nova

„Everything alright, hun?“, you asked, even though you could see that no, everything was not okay. Albedo's head was laying on the table, hands in his hair and art supplies thrown all over the surface, some of the papers even laid on the floor. The signs were more than clear, your husband suffered from an art block. Which was very unfortunate, there was a deadline he had to meet and many illustrations to make. „You have eyes, you can see“, he grumbled from his position, causing you to sigh. Sitting down next to him, you rubbed a hand over his back in comfort. „That bad?“ He only nodded, moving so he could use your lap as a pillow, burying his face at your thighs. „Every time I get an idea, I end up scratching it. I lose focus halfway through“, he explained his problem, „I need something to focus.“

„So...drawing things you don't see is not bringing you places right now?“, you carefully asked, receiving a nod. A smile spread on your face, and you pulled Albedo up. Your hands cupped his face before you kissed him on the nose and on the lips for a moment. „Draw me, hun.“ Albedo blinked, this proposal seemed to have thrown him off-guard. Yet the idea was not bad, it checked all the boxes he needed right now. He could see you, didn't need to use his imagination and he could ogle you all he wanted.

„That is a wonderful idea, my love“, he said, his smile matching yours. Before you could chuckle and make a remark, he kissed you. „Go dress into something comfortable~ I'll prepare a comfy nest of blankets and pillows for you~“ You giggled, kissing his nose again before leaving. It took a bit to find an outfit that satisfied both the want to be comfortable and also the desire to not look like a formless blob. Didn't want to make it too easy for you beloved, after all. If it was, he would be done too soon and his art block would not be cured, leaving him with less time and still no inspiration. Which was against why you did this in the first place. As you came back into the living room, you saw your husband piling up and arranging various pillows and blankets on the couch, trying to set a scene and also make it look like the perfect background for the painting. You chuckled, announcing your presence. Albedo spun around, a smile on his face, evidence on how much he wanted to draw you. It was cute, really. „Looks great, my dear“, you said, kissing his cheek before settling among the pillows. He smiled, pulling up a chair and sitting down on it, canvas on the stand and pencils ready as if his life depended on them. Archons above, you loved this man.

„Well then, Mister Artist~“, you chuckled, quoting from a play you recently saw, „Draw me like one of your fountaine girls~“ Albedo snorted, remembering how much you talked about that play, especially that line. Seemed like you finally found a good way to use it, even with fitting context. You giggled while you watched him, and the sound was infecting. He needed to control his own laughter, or his hands would shake too much to make a usable sketch. „Stop giggling“, he demanded, though his voice was soft and almost a giggle itself, „You're distracting me.“ The comment made you giggle even more. „What can I say? I'm having fun, and I can admire my husband doing something he loves.“ Albedo blushed a bit, a tiny smile on his lips. „And I can stare at my beloved all I want~ And create a masterpiece for our living room~“ Now it was your turn to blush, the thought of Albedo wanting to keep the picture not even having crossed your mind. Then again, Albedo kept everything related to you. Even the pebble you swore looked like a heart, when nobody else saw it. That little thing never left his pocket and he had gone crazy when he thought he lost it once. People could say what they wanted about him, but Albedo was a lovesick fool when it came to you.

Not that you minded it at all. Moments like this were the ones you lived for. The quiet peace, when you both were filled with content and love. Eyes meeting each other, soft smiles shared. Times when you could both laugh about yourselves, not having to put on a facade for anyone else. Just the two of you, wrapped up in your love for each other. Just the purest of love, sometimes silly, sometimes tender. Just for the two of you, and no one else. You felt the warmth of the moment bubble in your chest, before filling your entire body. „I love you“, you whispered, and heard how the pencil stopped on the canvas. Albedo stood up, walking over and kneeling down to you. Gently, he placed a kiss on your lips, smiling. „I love you too, [Y/N]“, he whispered back. You returned his smile, before he went back to his work. This was another moment engraved in your memory forever. And judging by how the smile didn't leave Albedo's face, it would be the same to him.

[themculibrary]

Marvel Siblings Masterlist

fics in which siblings are the spotlight such as thor+loki, pietro+wanda, etc.

Bucky & Rebecca

Frayed Ties (ao3) - Erica45, snarkymuch G, 2k

Summary: Bucky never went looking for his family, afraid of what he'd find or what they'd think of him. He thought if they were out there, they would be better off without him. It wasn't until a little boy who shared his name ducked into the coffee shop to hide from a fight that his feelings changed.

new york is the ocean (and the ocean is bleedin' salt) (ao3) - defcontwo rebecca/peggy, steve/bucky M, 3k

Summary: It is 1970, and ten minutes and however many blocks ago, Rebecca Barnes looked across the street and out of the corner of her eye, saw a man ascending from the U-Bahn and set off down the street. He had on a dark coat and he walked with a deep, heavy weight to his gait, a swagger with no joy in it, and for all that he walked with his head down, she saw enough to be sure, in that moment so completely dead certain, that he wore her brother's face.

The trouble is, James Buchanan Barnes has been dead for twenty-six years.

Protective Big Brothers (ao3) - haveufoundwhaturlookingfor rebecca/sam, steve/bucky G, 1k

Summary: Sam is taking Rebecca out on their first date, he has the pleasure of meeting her big brother, Bucky.

Unlike Bucky (ao3) - 107th (FeelsVomit) G, 622

Summary: In 2016, Bucky was not the only Barnes alive. Rebecca Barnes was still living in New York City.

Bucky goes to visit Rebecca, and she recognises him.

Sam & Sarah

'cause with a love like this (ao3) - philthestone G, 3k

Summary: “I am so proud of you, Sam Wilson,” Sarah says, and means it, so very much.

Static in the Dark (ao3) - thefatedthoughtofyou sam/bucky T, 4k

Summary: Prompt from abc-easy-as-123 on tumblr:

So prompt idea, some bad guy follows Bucky to the docks for revenge (over whatever you can decide) and Sarah gets to see how protective Bucky really is over Sam when he gets in the line of fire

summer's end (ao3) - junipermoss sam/bucky n/r, 5k

Summary: When Sam shows up to Sarah's house with an injured Bucky, she expects them to hate each other.

They don't.

the smile that's on my mouth (it's hiding the words that don't come out) (ao3) - the_crown_jules G, 1k

Summary: Six months ago Sam walked back into the Wilson family house for the first time in two years. Except it hadn’t been two years, it had been seven.

Sam tries to find his footing.

Thor & Loki

Castles in the Air (ao3) - cosmic_medusa T, 182k

Summary: Loki’s first act as King is to collect his banished brother to aid his regency, however brief. Thor discovers that the political landscape is far from what it seemed, and that the lies of Odin have resulted in the threat of both his sons’ safety and sanity. Drama, angst, double-crosses, butchering of folklore and history, and the epic bromance of Asgard’s Princes ensues.

Fevered Memories (ao3) - Storyteller_of_the_Forest G, 31k

Summary: Being trapped in one’s own mind is a terrible fate. When the past and the present start blurring together, how does one tell them apart?

With most of the healers out of town, the Odinsons struggle to find an answer to a mysterious illness before it’s too late. The answer may lie in the past. However, the destruction of Asgard meant the destruction of most of their remedies. If the illness is from Asgard, the cure may no longer exist.

The Art of Spinning (ao3) - gaslightgallows (hearts_blood) T, 12k

Summary: Following Malekith’s attack on Asgard, Frigga survives, but the only thing holding her to life is Loki. Desperate to save his wife, Odin alters Loki's sentence, imprisoning him instead in Frigga's sickroom. Alone with his ill and unconscious mother, Loki helps Thor and Jane escape Asgard as best he can, and then must confront both the damage he's caused and the damage his family has inflicted, on himself and on others.

Will to Live (ao3) - Lise T, 60k

Summary: Thanos is dead and the war is over, but the universe hasn't seen fit to give Thor anything back. When he finds out that there might be a way to return at least one person to life...how can he not take the chance?

Unfortunately, everything has a price.

Gamora & Nebula

Bad Habits (ao3) - Sholio T, 3k

Summary: It looks like Nebula might be developing a bad habit of helping Gamora out of trouble. Set post-GotG 2.

Certainty of Tides (ao3) - MyresLight T, 3k

Summary: At every opportunity, Thanos pairs Nebula with Gamora.

Be it for competition, training, or war, the sisters are disciplined and appraised as a matching item.

They are two halves of a whole. A weary, broken machine.

A look at Nebula growing up under Thanos, and her relationship with Gamora.

Circulate (ao3) - interabang T, 2k

Summary: With the exception of Gamora, Nebula couldn’t care less about what happened to the Guardians. Not even a little bit.

Things Never Stay the Way They Were (ao3) - Rekall T, 1k

Summary: It has been a year since Gamora was taken in by Thanos. As she trains to be his assassin, she finds herself drawn towards the new girl who recently arrived.

pietro & wanda

Open Mind, Metal Heart (ao3) - Huntressride13 wanda/vision T, 80k

Summary: For the first time in her life, Wanda Maximoff is alone. Even with the chance of Pietro's return she cannot linger on the past, but must focus on her future as a new member of the Avengers. Somehow she never considered the possibility that the Vision would be such a large part of that future.

pietro and wanda. (ao3) - pyroallerdyce G, 1k

Summary: when they were children, their mother and father had encouraged their closeness.

[felikatze]

give me the a brainworms i am deeply invested in this man

(0) (2) (3) (4)

okay first of all you asked for this. second of all if i am a little off track from the game that is explained by me just building thoughts like building blocks without looking back. third i was supposed to be studying for an exam but this counts as practice right? it's character analysis anyway lmao.

buckle the fuck up, my dearest anon, because I have sub headings.

1. A as the Player Character

Let me begin with why I am obsessed with this horrid little guy in the first place: he's a silent protagonist. I am always obsessed with protagonists. It's a law of nature. I love taking hollow characters and dissecting them for scraps. It's a long standing practice of mine.

Being a silent protagonist, A, as X, does not have a set personality. However, there are patterns. Firstly, as any semi-silent protagonist, A is a reactive character. He does not start incidents, he only responds to situations, presented by the Sephirah, as they arise. He does not actively seek out new information, merely going about the routine of expanding departments, but expresses curiosity when information is presented to him.

I'm aware fandom likes to characterize X and A differently, likely because they are initially presented as different characters. I, on the other hand, would like to pose the theory that they are more similar than expected.

I believe that A is also a reactive character, rather than active. Despite the fandom wiki describing him as stubborn, the goal A pursues with such fervor, the completion of the Seed of Light, is not actually a goal he set for himself. Carmen is the one who set this goal for him by leaving him her legacy.

Throughout the backstory we get relating to the Cogito Project, A is Carmen's assistant, whereas Carmen is the driving researcher. This is how many of the City's inhabitants seem to be; going with the flow of goals set for them by superiors. Yes I will get into his attachment to Carmen later.

The above is not to say A isn't stubborn. Once he has accepted a goal as his own, he will pursue it at all costs, as is obvious from any and all flashbacks leading to horrible deaths. But the point isn't his pursuit of the goal, but where that goal comes from. Even Lobcorp itself supports this, despite what Hokma may say; A as X follows the "simple" task of managing the Corp's day to day activities, and executes any mission given to him by the Sephirah. He outranks them, and doesn't actually need to do their missions, but does so anyway. Players are driven by the reward offered by those missions, of course, and A might be the same in that regard. Nonetheless, at no point in gameplay do you do anything somebody else hasn't told you to.

The overarching narrative of the Script would be the most obvious example. Every single person in the game follows the script, whether they know it or not.

Lastly on this note, a phrase we hear attributed to A, "Machines must behave as machines." Now, Angela may be attached to this phrase because it bears significance to herself as a machine, and informs most of A's unjust treatmeant of her. However, what if it doesn't just apply to machines? The phrase reads as such, "Everyone must act according to their own role."

2. A, Carmen, and the disease of the mind

So, A will at any cost pursue goals Carmen set for him. Question is, why? The obvious answer would be saying he's in love with her, which like, true. But also, how did Carmen come to be so precious to him?

Let us return to the comparison, "This is how many of the City's inhabitants seem to be." We don't really know why exactly most characters joined Carmen, excluding mainly Daniel and Benjamin. But this does not mean we can't have theories.

Carmen's ideal was curing the "disease of the mind." What is the disease? Complete hopelessness. The inability to form aspirations and dreams, to think of a better future. A is a very reactive character who does not set goals for himself. Therefore, I personally conclude, that initially, Carmen's ideology resonated with him because he could identify with the disease.

This is the point where I start rewatching Lobcorp story clips. Dear god.

So, by briefly binging day 27 onward, I've come up with lines that very much support this lil theory of mine:

First, from Carmen, a description of the disease, "People lock away their own potential."

Second, a line from Angela, after the memory synchronization, "You've locked yourself in this prison without bars."

Carmen describes A as humble, and Benjamin thinks he is warm. If I suppose A was one of the diseased initially, Carmen would be the catalyst for this change. Carmen was someone with big aspirations, with plans to heal what is wrong with the City, and it gave him hope. He was one of the diseased, but through time with Carmen, with that relentless optimistic spirit, he may have been cured, for a time. It's not a stretch to say that she was his light.

But lor shows us what happens when the seed of light sprouts wrong, doesn't it? It distorts. A grasped hope for the first time and then it is ruthlessly crushed. Carmen was everything. Yes, A is described as a jack-of-all-trades, as a genius in all pursuits he puts his mind to, but what does that matter in the face of someone who can unite people? Who can give them hope of a better world? Who can inspire them to actually use the talents they have?

And what kind of pressure is it to put the legacy of a messiah in the hands of the diseased?

3. A and the Perception Filter: A is weak to White damage

No, I am serious about that. He's extremely weak mentally. Obviously death of a loved one is a changing experience for absolutely anybody, but Carmen's death destroyed him.

Not only did he refuse to confide this grief to anyone and bottled it up, now everybody looked to him to lead the project, but he just isn't Carmen. He isn't an ambitious person, he doesn't have the same optimism, he can't bring people together, but people expected him to, and he failed. Hard.

While he was without a doubt talented in science, he was also just an average guy.

After her death, A grew to hate humans. He lost trust in them. He refused to confide in anyone, and be confided in by anyone. Thus, the team fell apart.

In both lobcorp and lor, we get interesting tidbits about precations taken to protect the manager.

Firstly, Lobcorp's perception filter. The cartoony art-style of the game is a result of the game being in first person. Through the eyes of the manager, everything is cartoony!

This is a measure undertaken to specifically protect the manager's psyche. Angela tells us that, before it was deployed, the manager would frequently go insane, one notable incident including the manager trying to hang himself. When we first hear this, the previous managers and X are still separate in our minds. However, they're all A! A went insane multiple times without it.

This is understandable, considering that employees also frequently go insane and try to kill both themselves and others. But they're there in action, confronting the Abnormalities directly. Just watching them made the manager go mad. They could not handle the responsibility for the employees' deaths.

In lor, Angela explains why she picked the Rabbit Team from R Corp as their main contractor instead of any other team. One team was simply too big for L Corp's narrow hallways, and the other team... dealt in psychic damage. It was simply too big of a risk for the manager. But the manager is always secure behind the cameras. Would that teams methods just be that brutal visually, or would their attacks have reached the manager?

Combined with his immense grief at all of his friends and coworkers dying in part because of him, A cannot bear to look at death.

4. A's greatest flaw: Avoidance

A common thread during Core Meltdown flashbacks: A refuses to look at suffering. He just can't. Whether it be looking away from Elijah writhing on the floor or hanging up on Daniel's panicked report of death.

This is actually the thing Angela takes the biggest issue with, and what hurt her most. A would never look at her, acknowledge her, and she did not understand why. But I think A did not refuse to look at her out of maliciousness. Rather, it was out of grief over Carmen. He could not look at her without being reminded of what he lost.

Angela's creation came about because A wanted someone to guide him, someone like Carmen. He threw himself into the project to the point it made Benjamin happy that A was passionate about anything again. But as soon as the project he distracted himself with is complete, he is filled with regret. Carmen cannot be replicated, and he breaks again.

Furthermore, tying this back to my first point about A being a reactive person, we see Angela take charge over A. She's the one recruiting employees and leading the business. It was likely a relief for him to be able to step down from the leading position.

But avoiding it made everything worse. He did not act when he saw Elijah's unchecked ambition, he did not act beyond a simple check at Gabriel's decay, he gave Giovanni the same hope he clung to to no avail, et cetera et cetera.

Avoiding his problems is making them worse and sending everything down the drain (including his psyche), so he deals with it the only way he knows how, avoiding them more!

Biggest example of A's big avoidance problem as his psyche crumbles: the memory wipe. A, in perhaps his one singular moment of acknowledging his emotions, recognizes that he is incapable of fulfilling the Script in his current state. His grief is just too much.

By erasing his own memory, he could start fresh without his grief, because he might've really killed himself otherwise. His suffering became bigger and bigger, and he coped by avoiding it.

The memory wipe allowed him to distangle his problems. Through his interactions with the Sephirah (which I will not individually detail for the sake of my sanity and because I dumped all this on a friend on discord already), he can deal with and actually process his issues one at a time.

As the motto describes, only by facing the fear can he build the future. Only by finally facing his grief and acknowleding it, seeing that the past cannot be changed and he has no choice to move forward, can he actually do so.

5. The Sephirah as ghosts

Lobotomy Corporation feels like a ghost story. I've touched upon this in my previous A post.

As you reach the Corp's lower levels, there are less Sephirah. First there are four. They act like normal employees, and do not breach into the story's underbelly until you reach their core supressions and the facade breaks. Second, counting Tiphereth as one, there are three. They still go about their duties, but they know what they are. Third, there are two, and the facade is gone. They know what they are, and they will tell you about the sins of the past.

And finally, you reach Keter, and there is only one.

This gradual decay of the facade is what really gets to me. I said that by interacting with the Sephirah, A deals with his issues one by one, but that's what the Sephirah are, in this case. Representations.

The people the Sephirah used to be are dead, and the Sephirah are their ghosts. The core supression involve putting these ghosts to rest. Doesn't it match the progression of a typical ghost story? Find the ghost, find what they used to be, and help them move on.

So, if everyone is a ghost, then A is alone.

But, behind the scenes, the Sephirah are still there. They are still people, and they have changed for the better, too. As always, A simply does not look.

(Does he even see the good others see in him? Does he look away from praise, too? Did he even realize Benjamin's admiration for him? Will we ever know?)

6. A's end.

A's progression of moving on would be fine and dandy if it did not end as thus: A does kill himself.

A sees himself beyond the point of no return. Everyone is dead. He is alone. Carmen is never coming back. He can't call it quits now, or else everything has been in vain. (Even if the last days show us a part of him wants to just quit, so badly.)

So, there's only one thing left to do: follow the Script to its ending. Fulfill Carmen's legacy at all costs. Death as the ultimate release.

This is the point where I admit I do not like the death as release trope. But the game does a good enough job as presenting it as the only option A had, or the only option he saw himself as having.

However, I've mentioned it before, I'll mention it again: A was not alone. Death was his release, but he left wreckage. In order to end his own suffering, he inflicted the same pain he went through on others.

Throughout the game, he moves on and pushes through. The ending shows that in reality... he didn't.

At least in lor the characters stick together and help each other heal.

This has been most of my thoughts on A, amounting to my longest analysis post ever, having taken me approximately two and a half hours to complete, and clocking in at 2337 words including up to this paragraph.

Thank you anon for giving me the incentive to verbalize all of this, so I can finally be at ease having inflicted my thoughts on everybody else.

[yanderepuck]

I HAVE BEEN SUMMONED

Alright. So it's fanon that Vincent doesn't feel negative emotions due to trauma. And the fact that he doesn't remember much of it due to trauma. He sorta blocked it out.

I tried to do some research a few months ago on Vincent and Gauguin but I didn't get many answers. But basically the two got into some sort of argument and he cut his ear off in response. And Gauguin basically went "fUCK THIS" and dipped. There's also rumors that Gauguin was jealous of Vincent bc it seemed like his talent came naturally??? But Gauguin was also a little scared/wary of Vincent. Vincent was also schizophrenic.

Gauguin isn't in Vincents route for reasons that are explained in Theos. We get more info on Vincent in Theos route.

But what I believe could have happened is that rather than Vincent having an episode and cutting his ear off after the argument, Gauguin shot him during said argument. Sort of like...a different timeline/ what if situation

WHICH ALSO DOESNT MAKE MUCH SENSE TO HAVE HIM AS THE RIVAL TBH BC IRL THEY DIDN'T HATE EACH OTHER.

There's also no official diagnosis on Vincent. So we aren't 100% what was wrong, there's just diagnosis from people studying his behavior after death.

As for cybird not making him depressed but they did with Dazai.

They actually didn't do Dazai justice. They combined all 5 suicide attempts into one..and made it seem like he killed himself because he blamed himself for a woman's death. There's much of Dazai's past missing. Is he depressed in game? Yes. But his trauma is barely a fraction of irl Dazai.

With Vincent I think they wanted the cute sunshine flower boy trope because you look at his art and why would you think this man was in multiple mental hospitals. Plus there's just simply the dynamic that Theo and Vincent have, they wanted siblings that were opposites.

And honestly....I'm glad cybird went with the cute sunshine flower boy rather than his actual depressed self. There are only two instances where they have proved they can show that much emotion. Theo's route when Jean mentions Theo's PTSD. Charles' route with his PTSD. In my opinion they haven't been able to do that right in any other routes. So I'd rather just have this boy who can't remember anything bc trauma/depression brings memory loss...then have them mess up a very important guy in history that many of us care about.

I am 100% okay with creating my own version of Vincent rather than cybird trying to depict manic-depression, schizophrenia, and whatever those episodes were.

They only give themselves 26 chapters and they do have to rush things at times, and that is NOT something I would want them to rush. Because they did with Dazai. And what did we get out of that? The power of love cured him

I know your love of van Gogh a bit too well (and I love him too) so I thought you'd be the perfect person to air these thoughts out to

Basically you know the whole thing of Vincent cutting his ear off we all do but I think Ikevamp realllyy missed out on something here because recently there was the whole theory that Gauguin was the one to cut Vincent's ear but they both decided to keep it a secret for sake of protecting Gauguin from prison.

And then there's the theory that this was also spurred on by Theo's marriage coming up soon and it caused Vincent to have a episode due to stress about his future

Now personally I don't believe these in their full it probably was a combination of all his mental health struggles and bits and pieces from these theories but

OH MY GOD Ikevamp missed out on some good stuff ESPECIALLY considering they portray Gauguin as being jealous and Vincent being this all good angel of COURSE he'd do something like that for his best friend right

I will die mad about ikevamp cutting (haha get it) that part of Vincent's true life out there's so much good stuff there

And that concludes my tedtalk that you for listening to me ramble about Vincent (i'm a little crazy about him sometimes irl and ikevamp's verison)

SDHJHJSDHJSDHJHJ I THINK EVERYONE DOES AT THIS POINT HELPPPP

I KNOWWWWWWW THEY SHOULD HAVE TALKED ABOUT THAT??? LIKE TAHTS SUCH A CRUCIAL PART OF HIS LIFE AND THEY JUST SKIPPED OVER IT??? AND GAUGUIN DIDNT EVEN SHOW UP IN HIS MAIN STORY ROUTE IT WAS ALWAYS WILL. THEY COULD HAVE DONE SO MUCH AHRAJJHRAJHRHDJ

like ok ikevamp vincent has trauma thats very relatable to me but they didn't really address the mental things he struggled through during his life its like they made him a completely different guy AND YEA OK ITS AN OTOME I GET IT BUT ITS A HISTORY OTOME I WISH THEY DID HIM BETTER