#I love the story and the characters I get to create

[liondrakes]

Absolutely. Speaking as a writer, I could tell from jump that there’s no satisfaction in using gen-AI. Even if someone took out all moral disputes regarding the technology, I’d still have no incentive to use it.

This technology doesn’t know what I know on a personal level. It doesn’t know my style. It doesn’t know the themes or angles I want to tackle. Even if I gave it this information, it’d be a derivative of what I actually want to convey.

Why would I waste my time using it for my work?

There is nothing satisfying about asking a bot to “write” what I’m thinking of and watching said bot spit back “content” that it scraped from somewhere else. If I wanted a story that was loosely stitched together, I’d sift through my old WIPs from high school or undergrad, pick out what I liked, and stitch something together myself.

It will never have the satisfaction of writing out the ideas circulating in my head, knocking out the ones I’m not too into and making outlines for the idea that wins me over.

It will never have the satisfaction of the drafting process— the moment you finally get to write, to go through the trial and error of how you want to present your work. It’s hard. It’s time-consuming. It’s humbling, but it’s rewarding all the same.

It will never have the satisfaction of sharing what you’re working on with other people. It’s certainly nerve-wracking if you’re looking to publish, but I’m talking about friends, mutuals on social media, other writers in Discord servers and forums, et cetera. It doesn’t even need to be completed. Exchange drafts with people. Organize the notes you’ve taken on your characters, and share them as OCs (because that’s basically what they are).

I get none of that from gen-AI.

You know what I get? Empty words from a generated response.

I’m impartial to that. It’s technology at the end of the day. It’s programmed to do this. Yet, it’s still one of many reasons why I’ll never touch it as a writer. Empty ideas, empty criticisms and empty feedback in general get me nowhere. It doesn’t motivate me to write, and it damn sure doesn’t help me improve what I’m writing.

Furthermore, sharing that you told a bot to “create” something holds no weight. Anybody can do that, and I find it funny when this sentiment is used to defend gen-AI. The bot scrapes together anything it can muster to give you results. It does the same for anyone else who uses it, thus you have nothing of interest to show.

Not only would using gen-AI deprive me of what makes the creative process so worthwhile, it also keeps me in a cycle of monotony. Writing stops being a creative practice. It becomes boredom.

Tech companies pitched a vacuum of button-pressing and sold it to people under the guise of efficiency. Meanwhile, their idea of efficiency guts the entire experience.

If someone told me as a teen that if I love writing, and that I should give ChatGPT a try, I likely wouldn’t care for their suggestion.

Think of it this way: if someone recommended you a video game, and also recommended you to look at a bunch of walkthroughs and shortcuts while playing it, would you?

It’d defeat the purpose of playing the game, right? You don’t get the full experience that way.

Why scrape the arts and miss everything when you alone hold the key to that experience?

As gen-AI becomes more normalized (Chappell Roan encouraging it, grifters on the rise, young artists using it), I wanna express how I will never turn to it because it fundamentally bores me to my core. There is no reason for me to want to use gen-AI because I will never want to give up my autonomy in creating art. I never want to become reliant on an inhuman object for expression, least of all if that object is created and controlled by tech companies. I draw not because I want a drawing but because I love the process of drawing. So even in a future where everyone’s accepted it, I’m never gonna sway on this.

[14dayswithyou]

I literally have the most amazing and wonderful community in the entire world???? T_T In this essay, I will—

This is going to be raw and unedited because I want to get my initial thoughts out there before I forget n go back to crying /pos, but?? Yawl.... I can't even begin to find the words to express how appreciative and grateful I am for each and every one of you!! ;v;

I've spent the past few hours reading through everyone's personally written messages, then rereading them all again to let it all fully sink in. I'm being genuine when I say that I've never felt this loved or appreciated in any community before in my life.

Those in the Discord server might know about this already, but since the start of this year, I haven't really been enjoying myself (nor have I been as active) in the yandere VN community. There was far too much infighting between devs, parasocial communities, and toxic anons that ruined so much for me — so I withdrew from it all and remained in my own small bubble. Even then, I still got belittled, harassed, doxxed, and even became the target of Tall Poppy Syndrome by others; most of which nearly made me want to leave altogether, but the overflowing amount of support from everyone in the 14DWY community made me want to stay.

And even now, after reading all those heartfelt messages... I think it's permanently solidified the little space I occupy here on the internet :3

So... Yeah, long story short (and a story that will likely end up as its own separate Tumblr post gjskskjd), I wasn't enjoying myself at all in the yandere VN community... but I did have the time of my life in the 14DWY community. And it's all thanks to you guys.

I'm genuinely sooooo proud to have such an endlessly kind, social, and talented community; and I'm glad to have brought such an interactive and friendly group of people together over our shared interest in such a nice concept. 14DWY is essentially a labour of my love — and although I'm ultimately creating it for me and my silly interests — it's still something that I want to make worthy of you guys as well. All the love and support you've shown me and 14DWY motivates me to do my very best, and y'all deserve nothing less. So...

Thank you all for finding a comfort character in my Totally Normal Guy and his Totally Not Eccentric quirks. Thank you for all the insanely talented creations y'all make and share with me. Thank you for sending in your silly (/pos) questions and turning them into inside jokes and AUs for the rest of the community to enjoy. Thank you for talking with me and making this space a genuinely fun place for me to be in again.

From the bottom of my heart; thank you all so much. I really hope everyone has had an amazing year so far, and I hope 2025 will be as kind to you as you all were towards me.

I also want to give a big fat massive huuuuuuuge shout-out to Ashe / @flaneur001 my love (/p) for organising the 14DWY letter event on Discord, and for contributing so much of their time and dedication to the 14DWY community. You say you've only been part of the community for a year, but to me, that was a year well cherished and appreciated. The 14DWY community (and me especially) have all been so lucky to spend this past year with you, and I sincerely hope you've enjoyed it as much as we have. You've done so much for me, the community, and the 14DWY Discord server, so it's only fair that you get the recognition you deserve. So thank you, Ashe!! And a big thank you to everyone in the 14DWY Discord who participated in this event as well!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some cryin and sobbin to do <3 /silly /pos

[kudouusagi]

Pash Utsumi Hiroko Interview

It's sure to be a heartwarming, Fan & Fun experience!

It's about the moments you weren't able to see in the main series.

--Looking back at the scenario meetings, is there anything that stands out in your memory?

Like the fact that there was a longer version where (series writer) Ookouchi Ichirou, the producers, and I all came up with ideas for what to do in the OVA and decided on it, only to realize it didn't fit into the time limit plan I came up with myself and so it was rejected (laughs). Of course Reki and Langa are the main characters so they're going to appear in the OVA but we really wanted to include them all... and that would be difficult to do in one story so we made it into an omnibus format.

--What do you want people to pay attention to in this OVA?

I'd like it if you could check which scenes were shown in the PV. For example, Reki and the others play karuta, but what kind of karuta is it? Who's playing against who? Will Langa, who is bad at reading and writing, be okay?! In the part with Sakurayashiki and Nanjo set in the past, what was their high school life like? What were their fights like back then? How developed are Nanjo's muscles?! Also, the unknown life of Kikuchi, which was kept top-secret in the main story, is revealed...!?! And more!

--Please tell us about what you remember when looking back on recording the voices for this OVA.

I was happy to see that Hatanaka Tasuku-san, who plays Reki, and Kobayashi Chiaki-san, who plays Langa, were still the same Reki and Langa even though several years had passed. I didn't feel any time had past... ∞(eternal) Friendship! It was also memorable how Koyasu Takehito-san, who plays Ainosuke, struggled with a certain scene. Look forward to finding out which scene it was! It had been a while since I last did the voice recording for SK8, and it brought back memories for me, making me feel like SK8 was back!

--What exactly is the theme for this OVA...?

Since it is an omnibus format, there is no overall theme, but they're each filling a gap that wasn't able to be seen in the main story.

--In order to get to know the characters more deeply before the OVA is released, are there any behind-the-scenes details that you haven't revealed yet (that you couldn't show in the first season of the TV series)?

The different headband Reki is wearing in the OVA PV is a souvenir present from his sister Koyomi. It's shaped like an akabeko with a tiger pattern... it's quite unique. Reki only wears it at home. Langa doesn't care about clothes, so he'll wear anything that's comfortable to move in, so he's wearing something strange this time. Please check out the OVA to find out the details☆

--For those who are rewatching the first season of the TV series, what are some of the points you would like people to pay special attention to?

Don't miss anything! The relationship between MIYA and Reki, the outcome of Hiromi's fleeting love, the current fight scenes between Sakurayashiki and Nanjo, the vibe of the master and dog relationship between Ainosuke and Kikuchi, etc. The bond between Reki and Langa through the whole series and how it develops into friendship, keeps your eyes peeled on it till the very end!! And since the theme song for this OVA was created with the TV series in mind, so I'm certain it will improve your understanding if you watch the whole series and think of it while listening to it☆

--Finally, please give a message to the fans of "SK8". 

We're sorry to have kept you waiting for so long, but thanks to everyone who has been waiting that the day we can finally deliver it to you is fast approaching...! There's only a few more sleeps till the OVA is here ♬ How about going to the cinema to watch "SK8 EXTRAPART" as the finale to your New Year's celebrations? It's sure to be a heartwarming, Fan & Fun experience! Please look forward to its release☆

[tiyawnyana]

So this is a special request sent in by @reader210 , thank you for the request! I loved your idea and want to turn it into a multi-chapter story so this is chapter one!

A/N: I actually had so much fun creating this story because the characterization was a blast

Characters: Mel Medarda x Fem!Doctor!Reader

Warnings: nothing explicit, brief swearing, general confusion

—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—

An Apple a Day

Chapter 1

Synopsis:

Everything was normal- everything was starting to become better, pieces falling into place. You got your new position within the hospital secured, you were thinking about getting a dog, maybe even a cat. Life was beginning to make sense.

Until you end up in an entirely new world, apparently.

—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—

Footsteps echo through the halls, a soft sound in these vacant cells as you munch on the fruit given to you a Iittle while ago.

You huff, annoyed and tired with this insane situation.

You didn't expect this- to be somehow spawned into another world. One minute, you're in your office finishing some paperwork for a patient, the next, you're collapsing in the middle of a huge room, seemingly a meeting of elites to some sort.

You remember the shrieks of surprise, the throbbing in your skull as you weakly pushed yourself up with your palms. Your glasses had flung off in the events, nowhere to be found so now you're stuck with fuzzy vision and locked away while whoever figures out who and what you were.

You lean against the cold wall, huffing softly as you rub your fingers into your temple, feeling another headache brewing.

Footsteps get closer, entering the cell hallway and you sigh, rolling your eyes as they get nearer.

You see the fuzzy outline of someone, squinting to try and make them out but no such luck.

You groan as they stop at your cell and you decide to get up, pacing closer to the bars.

“Well? Figure me out yet?” You sass sarcastically.

“I don't think you're in a position to be sarcastic,” the woman murmurs, and you're almost convinced you hear a smirk in her tone.

“I don't think I'm in a position to do anything, I'm afraid, but here we are,” you smirk, leaning against the bars.

She's silent for a moment, gaze seemingly boring into you and you feel heat creeping up your neck in embarrassment. You avert your gaze, huffing softly.

“The Counsel hasn't figured out the cause of your appearance.. Where are you from? Noxus?”

You raise a brow in confusion and question, turning your gaze back to her,”Where the hell is Noxus? I'm from Chicago-”

“Chicago?” She echoes, bewildered,”I don't recognize your accent-”

“Typical brit, huh?” You try to joke but it falls flat. You swallow, looking away again.

“What is your position? Status?”

“Uh- what?”

“Your title,” she speaks firmly.

You look back at her despite her still blurry form,”Uh.. Doctor?”

“You're a Doctor?” She echoes, seemingly surprised,”In that uniform?”

“What's wrong with my uniform?” You look down at the white doctors coat with your soft navy cardigan underneath.

“I've never seen that kind of uniform on a doctor- seems unfitting-”

“Okay-”

“That- is not the main focus of my visit,” she sighs, before lifting her hand and handing you something.

“What's that-”

“Your glasses.”

“Oh, thank fuck,” you grab them from her hand and quickly put them on, wincing at the slight blur before your vision comes back into focus and redirecting your gaze back to the woman before you.

Jesus- this woman is gorgeous. Unlike anyone you've ever seen- what?

“Uh- wow,” you murmur, eyes wide as you take her in.

“What?” She tilts her head in confusion.

You figure you must be dreaming. Some drug induced coma, for sure.

“You're stunning,” you say smoothly, uncaring for any embarrassment you'd surely feel if this was real life.

Her gaze widens in surprise, before she quickly masks over it.

“The counsel wishes to conduct an interview, an investigation of sorts to understand your appearance,” she speaks smoothly, bringing keys forward before hesitating,”I trust you'll behave?”

You snort, giving her a nod,”Yes, I'll behave. I'm just as curious as you all are.”

She eyes you for a moment before unlocking the cell, sliding the bars open and beckoning you forward.

You step out, stretching your arms above your head before inhaling sharply in surprise when a guard approaches quickly, cuffs on display.

“Those won't be necessary,” the woman speaks firmly, brushing her hand to signal the guard.

You eye her carefully,”Thank you.”

She nods in silence.

“What's your name?”

She rolls her eyes, ushering you to walk out and you huff a soft laugh.

She walks beside you, leading you through halls with the guard following behind. You can't take your eyes off of your surroundings, enthralled with the architecture and some paintings on the walls.

“This is one insane dream,” you murmur to yourself.

“A dream?” The woman echoes, shaking her head,”How interesting.”

You remember these doors, suddenly nervous at the sight of the giant, overly designed wood as you recall being dragged out of the room behind them.

They open, revealing that those same people from before are seated in their same chairs.

You're pushed forward by the guard and you out of reflex turn to smack at his hand but the woman waves the guard off as she beckons you to follow.

“In the center, if you will,” she murmurs, walking away for circle the table back to her own seat.

You listen as requested, hands clasped together at your front as you stand in the center, feeling as if you were under a microscope.

“Uh.. hi,” you wave awkwardly with a sheepish smile.

The doors open again, a higher pitched voice gaining everyone's attention and you turn to look, only for you to find nothing. They're still talking, though, and you follow the sound to the head of the table when a small person? Seats themselves down.

“It's about time we figured out this anomaly!” He grins through quirked ears and a bushy mustache.

Your head tilts, confusion etched into your face.

“Counselor Medarda, have you found out any new information about our guest?”

The woman, you learn now is something Medarda, turns to nod in his direction.

“Our guest is from what you called Chicago? I am unfamiliar with it-” she turns to look at you.

“Yes- Uh, Chicago, Illinois, to be exact.”

“Illinois-?” A man echoes, and you turn before stifling a smirk.

The blonde man was the definition of a twink back home.

You shake your head, refocusing as you face the head counselor,”Yes, in America?”

His ears perk, eyes narrowed as he peers back at you,”We don't know what you're talking about, this America- there's no lands here by that name.”

“What now?”

Counselor Medarda sighs in defeat,”I truly don't believe we'll find anything of ill intent here,” she speaks smoothly,”Counselor Heimerdinger?”

Your head turns to the head counselor- Heimerdinger, as he furrows his thick brows.

“You don't look of Noxus style,” he huffs,”Nor any other land I've ventured through. I'm curious, what was your occupation?”

“Oh- I'm a Doctor, sir,” you respond sheepishly.

“A Doctor! Impressive,” he smiles genuinely and you're surprised to find delight in that,”I think we could find use of you while keeping an eye on your movements.”

“Use of me-?” You echo in confusion.

“Oh, yes! I believe we could very well use your talents,” he looks to the other counselors.

Some honestly look as if they care less, that one twink in particular, but as your gaze flicks back toward him, you catch onto Ms. Medarda.

She's looking at you with a certain look, a glint to her eye, like she found something worth investing in.

Heat creeps up your cheeks and you don't hear anything else, too occupied with the golden freckles dusting her cheeks and her near hypnotizing eyes.

“Then it's settled!”

You whip your head back to Heimerdinger, expecting the worst but he's got a genuine, friendly smile on his face.

“You'll be under surveillance, of course, but we want to understand your form of healing- perhaps it is different in this.. Chicago?”

You nod in understanding, smiling shakily,”Of- of course, uh-”

“Counselor Medarda and Shoola will lead you around, you will have a stationed enforcer keeping an eye on you until we can determine that you are not a threat.”

You nod again, hands tightening at your front out of nerves.

“I expect weekly reports, have them set up the east wing for board and the first floor for an office for her,” he grins back at you,”I do hope to see good things from you.”

He calls the meeting to an end, hopping down from his chair and exiting the room with a few of the counselors following behind you.

Counselor Medardo waves off Shoola, approaching you from behind before stopping.

“Doctor?”

You snap back into focus, turning to look at her.

“Ready to go?” She beckons toward the door.

You take a moment to reply, nodding in confusion.

“What the hell was that?” You manage to say, following her out of the room.

“That was your interview, investigation, call it what you wish,” she waves it off.

You look at her in bewilderment,”Was that counselor made of metal?”

“Counselor Bolbok?” She side eyes you in confusion.

“Sure, whatever-”

“Hold on.. you've been looking confused,” she turns to you, stopping in the hallway.

“No shit, Sherlock, I’m confused-”

“Sherlock?” She questions, face scrunched in confusion.

Your eyes go wide, hand coming up to cup the back of your neck, stressed,“Ok- what is happening.”

She just raises a brow, that confused look still on her face.

“What was that!” You huff,”Counselor Heim..”

“Counselor Heimerdinger,” she finishes.

“Yes- what?” You laugh in surprise,”What.. is he? In the least disrespectful way possible.”

She's quiet for a moment before sighing in defeat,”You really aren't from here.. are you?”

“That's what I've been telling you-” a headache begins to form,”Did I somehow end up in an entirely new universe? Huh?”

She covers her mouth, hiding the small laugh at your expense.

“Heimerdinger is a Yordle,” she murmurs with a grin,”Bolbok is a gaseous being- he controls his metal exterior.”

You look at her as if she'd grown a second head,“What the hell is a yordle?”

—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—-—

A/N: I just needed an excuse to describe Salo as a twink sorry not sorry

[brightening-the-stars]

I was going to try to yap in the tags but it was too many characters, so for a bit of irrelevant commentary-- I'm personally fascinated by stories that follow semi-utopian societies in which a group of people has solved a bunch of problems caused by life under capitalism, but also thrown out a few desirable aspects of our current system as they built something entirely different. I think Ursula LaGuin's "The Disposessed" and Lois Lowry's "The Giver" do this especially well. (I've linked the Wikipedia synopses in case anyone is interested, though I would absolutely recommend reading both books!)

My tastes are partially driven by my politics (I really love stories that try to create realistic anarchist societies that maintain a level of technological sophistication similar to our own) but I think these stories are also just really engaging literature, because we get to explore the world through characters that take for granted things that we dream about, and dream about things that we take for granted. Because of this, they can avoid being prescriptive or preachy, and there's a pretty clear route to an interesting plotline as the characters dive into the non-ideal aspects of their organizational systems and try to rebel against or improve them.

I think solarpunk would lend itself really well to this sort of thing! What would it take, to unify people to create this sort of a future? What would we lose along the way? Even if we think these losses would be worth it, what would our great-great-grandchildren think as they are growing up in the world we've created? They should be allowed to complain about their world in a nuanced manner that recognizes that a broken utopia doesn't have to be cartoonishly oppressive. Work that criticizes aspects of a possible solarpunk future without reducing it to something monatonically bad would allow us to more clearly examine the flaws in our ideas and envision a realistic future.

(as a disclaimer, I'm not all that familiar with solarpunk so im not sure if this is coherent?? Also tagging @guutzprojects bc we were discussing similar ideas recently!)

I think a lot of the reason there's not been a ton of big solarpunk-style media is because it's inherently utopian and that leads to a real lack of conflict. Which is a shame that there's not a lot, because I LOVE how Solarpunk looks! But A lot of it is very big-scale from what I've seen; theorizing about ways man can integrate technology with nature, but not really what man is actually doing after that. What are the kinds of lives people would live in a solarpunk city? Surely actual human stories don't simply end because a lot of our needs are met. There's gotta be something!!

[mikeblocky]

Misaki Takamatsu speaks about her long-term serialization journey in Skip and Loafer (Translation)

Shuko Yokoi: Behind the Creation of Manga, Vol. 16 Shuko Yokoi - Manga Writer

Shuko Yokoi explores the beginnings of manga stories by speaking with their creators in her series "Behind the Creation of Manga." In its 16th installment, she sits down with Misaki Takamatsu, the author of Skip and Loafer.

Skip and Loafer: A quick synopsis

Mitsumi Iwakura, a bright and earnest girl from rural Ishikawa Prefecture, enters a prestigious high school in Tokyo as the top student in her class. While navigating her new environment, her straightforward and slightly quirky personality begins to influence her classmates in ways she doesn't realize. Among them is Shima, the "popular boy," with whom she slowly builds a meaningful connection. A heartwarming school-life comedy about the subtle power of sincerity.

A hybrid of Shojo and Seinen manga?

Yokoi: Reading Skip and Loafer feels so uplifting. It’s quite different from your earlier works, like Ameko Hime or The Boat of Canaries.

Takamatsu: That’s true. When I first started submitting stories, I mostly worked on short, standalone pieces. The Boat of Canaries, for instance, was heavier in tone, which suited the shorter format. But when I struggled to get approval for long-running concepts, I began thinking, if it’s going to be a longer series, why not make it something that encourages and uplifts readers? That shift also led me to adopt a lighter art style.

Chapter 1

Yokoi: Mitsumi’s expressions feel so vibrant and full of life.

Takamatsu: Thank you! I wanted her to feel cute but approachable, so I kept the lines simple and clean. During this time, I revisited shojo manga I loved as a student, like My Love Story!! by Aruko and Kazune Kawahara and My Little Monster by Robico. As a reader, I hadn’t noticed their subtle techniques, but revisiting them as a creator taught me a lot—how to leave certain lines out, how to balance coolness and cuteness in key panels.

Chapter 2

Yokoi: Skip and Loafer is serialized in the seinen magazine Afternoon, but it feels like it carries the soul of shojo manga in many ways.

Takamatsu: I think it’s had a huge influence on me. Since it’s a seinen magazine, I initially explored themes that felt more fitting—like professions, clubs, or other specialized topics—but they didn’t align with what I truly wanted to write. For example, if I focused too much on character drama in a shogi (Japanese chess) manga, readers might start wondering, “What happened to the shogi? Where is this story even going?” But with a romance-based shojo manga, those concerns seem to fade. It’s such a fascinating genre that allows for more flexibility.

Yokoi: There’s that saying about storytelling: “Meet expectations, but subvert them too.” Romance seems to naturally leave room for unexpected turns, without rigidly fixed outcomes.

Takamatsu: Exactly. Romance is a theme without a set goal or a definitive “correct” path. Readers can imagine and interpret as they go, which makes it easy to follow and invest in. That’s why I borrowed the classic themes and structures of shojo manga as the foundation for Skip and Loafer. From there, I could focus on the characters and create a story that felt uniquely mine.

It starts off like a typical rom-com—a “city boy” falling for a “simple, country girl”—but gradually, it’s clear that the story isn’t quite what you’d expect. Predictability isn’t fun, so I worked to subvert expectations little by little, surprising and delighting readers along the way.

Turning the "Prince" character into someone who feels human

Yokoi: You’ve mentioned before that Mitsumi and Shima’s dynamic was inspired by Mitsunari Ishida and Sakon Shima from Ryotaro Shiba’s novel Sekigahara. But, um… the connection seems a bit distant now, doesn’t it?

Takamatsu: (Laughs) Yes, the original inspiration has almost completely disappeared. But reading Shiba’s masterpiece taught me something vital: strong characters are everything. Mitsunari in Sekigahara is this intelligent, somewhat prickly figure who rubs people the wrong way, while Sakon, his loyal retainer, sees through his awkwardness and thinks, “He’s so bad at expressing himself, but that’s kind of endearing.” I loved the idea of a relationship that embraces someone’s flaws.

Chapter 1

Yokoi: It’s the kind of bond that goes beyond conventional labels like friendship or loyalty.

Takamatsu: Exactly. I wanted to explore that kind of relationship in a school setting. Of course, Sekigahara is steeped in war, which adds an intensity that wouldn’t suit a school-life comedy. So I gave Mitsumi some lovable quirks and made her more approachable to balance things out.

Yokoi: Mitsumi and Shima’s relationship feels refreshing—it’s not strictly romantic, yet it’s deeply compelling.

Takamatsu: That reflects my own high school experience. I had more fun with friends than anything else. I’d spend my allowance on manga instead of clothes, and I was so focused on art school that my mind was far from romance. Not everyone is caught up in love during their teenage years, and I wanted to depict that reality.

Yokoi: That balance of emotions feels universal. Are you the type to vividly remember your school days?

Takamatsu: I think so—memory might be one of my strengths. I remember the feelings, thoughts, and dynamics of those years very clearly. At first, I worried those details were too mundane to hold readers’ interest. But as I received feedback, I realized those “ordinary” parts were what readers connected with the most.

Yokoi: Many manga artists seem to have remarkable memories. It feels like a special gift.

Takamatsu: (Smiles) Maybe. But I also try to balance realism with gentleness. I don’t want the story to feel too raw or painful. Take Shima, for instance. At the beginning, he’s a "prince" type—a genuinely nice guy, but honestly, a bit too convenient. He’s the kind of character who inexplicably likes the protagonist and is always there to help her. At some point, though, I wanted readers to see, No, this guy is human too, with his own struggles.

The same goes for Mitsumi. I didn’t want her to be so good-natured that she came across as a saint. That would make her feel distant and less relatable. It’s about keeping the characters grounded while letting them shine.

Chapter 55

The bond between Mitsumi and Shima: A journey through time

Yokoi: Are there any particular scenes that left a strong impression on you?

Takamatsu: There are many, but one that stands out is the moment in Volume 7 when Mitsumi and Shima, after briefly dating, decide to go back to being friends. It’s a scene that could only exist because of the long journey they’ve shared. It’s something they could only say to each other because of the foundation they’ve built as friends over time.

I was worried readers might dislike Shima for that decision, but thankfully, that wasn’t the case. There are so many moments like that throughout the series—ones that only became possible because I was able to continue the story all the way through to Volume 11. Those are the kinds of scenes that make long-running storytelling so rewarding.

Chapter 46 - Warm Picnic

Yokoi: That’s one of the joys of a long-running series—the time to explore those shifts.

Takamatsu: Absolutely. The teenage years are such a transformative time—like a sponge, you absorb so much and evolve in ways unique to that period. I want to keep exploring how personalities and relationships shift during those formative years. If readers can feel that growth alongside the characters, connect with their journeys, and cheer them on, that would make me incredibly happy.

A story rooted in home and the heart

Yokoi: One character that becomes more and more moving as the story progresses is Mitsumi’s aunt, Nao. The scene where she cries alone in her hometown in Ishikawa changes meaning as the volumes go on.

Takamatsu: Thank you for saying that. As I worked on the series, I realized that the story isn’t about declaring, “City life is better” or “The countryside is the best.” Through Mitsumi, I wanted to depict the warmth and openness of rural life. At the same time, Nao’s journey as a transgender woman allowed me to show that the city offers a space where some people can truly thrive and express themselves. It’s about finding where you belong and honoring both sides of that balance.

Chapter 55

Yokoi: Mitsumi’s hometown is described as being “at the edge of Ishikawa Prefecture,” and Skip and Loafer has consistently included efforts to support the areas affected by the Noto Peninsula Earthquake. The 10th volume even had a special edition dedicated to disaster relief.

Takamatsu: I’m so grateful for all the people who have actively supported the relief efforts, especially during times when I couldn’t do much myself. It’s been a year since the earthquake, but the region has also suffered from heavy rains, and some areas still don’t have fully restored sewer systems. There’s a lot more to be done, and I plan to continue supporting these efforts moving forward.

A friend in the form of a story

Yokoi: Your acceptance speech at the Kodansha Manga Awards has stayed with me. You said, “When life feels like a battle against regret and loss, I hope my work can stand by readers like a friend, reminding them that it’s not just about those things.”

Takamatsu: As we grow older, it’s inevitable that we face moments of profound loss—whether it’s the death of someone close or other significant challenges. In those moments, instead of focusing on what’s gone, I think it’s important to realize, I had so much fullness in my life before this. That perspective can help us remember that we’ve been supported, loved, and fulfilled in ways we might overlook during hard times. That’s the kind of feeling I want my stories to evoke. If Skip and Loafer inspires someone to reach out to a friend they haven’t spoken to in a while, or to summon the courage to connect with someone they care about, I’d be so happy. Human relationships often reward us most when we engage with them wholeheartedly, even if it takes some effort. It’s in those genuine, fearless moments of connection that we find something truly meaningful.

Chapter 19

Extra (not in the original)

Have you ever wondered who is Shima Sakon and Ishida Mitsunari that Takamatsu-sensei mentioned? Here's something about them!

Shima Sakon and Ishida Mitsunari are two fascinating figures from Japan’s Sengoku period (1467–1615), an era of political upheaval and near-constant military conflict. Mitsunari was a high-ranking samurai and one of the key strategists for Toyotomi Hideyoshi, a unifier of Japan. Known for his intellect and strict adherence to rules, Mitsunari was often described as cold, calculating, and socially inept—qualities that earned him respect from some but disdain from many. His inability to navigate interpersonal relationships and his unrelenting idealism made him a polarizing figure in the Toyotomi camp.

On the other hand, Shima Sakon was a samurai who eventually became Mitsunari’s right-hand man, joining him during the latter’s rise in the chaotic power struggle following Hideyoshi’s death. Sakon was known for his military prowess, tactical skill, and charisma, which contrasted sharply with Mitsunari’s intellectual but often distant demeanor. Sakon reportedly referred to himself as a “wandering ronin” before aligning with Mitsunari, but once he joined, he was unwavering in his loyalty.

What made their relationship stand out was its deeply personal undertone, rare for a lord-retainer dynamic of the time. Mitsunari was a man who struggled to gain allies due to his blunt nature and rigid personality, yet Sakon saw beyond these traits. He recognized Mitsunari’s intelligence and idealism, appreciating his flaws as part of his humanity. In return, Mitsunari trusted Sakon in ways he couldn’t trust many others. Their bond went beyond strategy or battlefield hierarchy—it was grounded in mutual respect and understanding.

Their connection becomes especially poignant in the context of the Battle of Sekigahara (1600), one of the most pivotal conflicts in Japanese history. Mitsunari led the Western Army against Tokugawa Ieyasu’s Eastern Army, and Sakon played a significant role as a commander. Despite their combined efforts, the Western Army was decisively defeated, and both Mitsunari and Sakon met tragic ends—Sakon was mortally wounded in battle, and Mitsunari was later executed. Their fates reflect the collapse of their ideals in the face of political reality, but their loyalty to each other remains an enduring legacy.

In Sekigahara, a historical novel by Ryotaro Shiba, their relationship is portrayed with nuance, focusing not just on their roles in the war but on their personal dynamic. Mitsunari is painted as a misunderstood figure, awkward but driven by a sense of justice, while Sakon serves as his grounded, pragmatic counterpart. It’s this understated connection—marked by loyalty, respect, and a recognition of each other’s imperfections—that resonates deeply.

This dynamic, as Takamatsu-sensei mentions, subtly influenced the relationship between Mitsumi and Shima in Skip and Loafer. Shima, much like Sakon, begins as an idealized figure—a “prince” type who seems perfect but reveals vulnerabilities as the story progresses. Mitsumi, on the other hand, mirrors Mitsunari in her straightforwardness, occasional obliviousness, and quiet strength. Their connection isn’t easily categorized—it’s not purely romantic, nor is it strictly platonic. Instead, it’s about two people growing together, balancing each other’s strengths and weaknesses in a way that feels natural and deeply human.

The parallels between the historical duo and Takamatsu-sensei’s characters highlight the timelessness of certain human relationships. Whether it’s two samurai navigating the chaos of war or two high school students finding their place in the world, the essence of connection—flawed, messy, and quietly profound—remains the same. It’s not about perfection or grand gestures but about understanding and complementing each other in ways that make the journey worthwhile.

Personal part of my thoughts

shima sakon and ishida mitsunari are these figures from japan’s sengoku period, and their story feels weirdly timeless. mitsunari was this brilliant strategist, but he was also terrible at winning people over. he had no filter, couldn’t sugarcoat things, and honestly came off as cold or arrogant most of the time. but the thing is, it wasn’t like he was trying to be difficult—he just didn’t know how to be anything other than himself, even if that made him unpopular.

then you’ve got shima sakon, his retainer, who wasn’t just loyal but actually understood mitsunari in a way that most people didn’t. sakon looked at him and thought, “yeah, this guy’s awkward and kind of terrible at communicating, but that’s what makes him human—and honestly, a little endearing.” sakon didn’t see mitsunari as this cold figure; he saw someone trying, even if he wasn’t great at it.

their relationship wasn’t just about duty or ranks—it felt personal. sakon stuck around not because he had to but because he respected mitsunari, flaws and all. and mitsunari, even if he wasn’t great at showing it, clearly leaned on sakon in ways that went beyond their roles. together, they balanced each other out—mitsunari’s sharp mind paired with sakon’s charisma and groundedness. they were stronger because they had each other.

what’s so compelling about their bond, especially as it’s portrayed in sekigahara, is how understated it is. it’s not about big, dramatic moments—it’s in the quiet, everyday loyalty that doesn’t need to be spoken. it’s messy and imperfect, but it feels so real, and that’s what makes it stick with you.

in skip and loafer, you can kind of see shadows of that dynamic. shima starts out as this “prince” figure, someone who seems perfect on the surface, but as the story goes on, you see the cracks, the insecurities he carries. and mitsumi, with her straightforward and awkward charm, reminds me a little of mitsunari. she tries so hard but doesn’t always realize how she’s affecting others. their relationship, like mitsunari and sakon’s, isn’t easily defined. it’s not just friendship, and it’s not exactly romance—it’s about two people quietly growing and balancing each other in unexpected ways.

and i think what makes relationships like these so memorable is how real they feel. they’re messy and don’t fit into neat boxes, but that’s the point. whether it’s a warlord and his retainer or two high schoolers figuring out life, it’s those small, imperfect moments of understanding that make you feel something. it’s not about being perfect—it’s about being human, together.

Original resources

Interview: Link

Chapters: 1, 2, 19, 46, 55, translated by Tsubame Club and other people! Please check them on MangaDex: Link and also support the original version on COMIC Days: Link

All translated and resourced by me! Thank you for reading this!

[the-ellia-west]

SO

WHO WANTS HELP WITH THEIR STORY???

Moots and Open tag!

I am providing my free services, Hop in my DMs or my ask box with your Plot, Worldbuilding, Character, or just concept Troubles!

I need practice for helping people with their stories and keeping several people's WIPs straight in my head if I'm going to be the leader of Storytelling Club next year!

I can provide advice, help brainstorming, what kinds of things I would personally like seeing, feedback on plot or scenes, critiques, or help you create something or flesh it out, like a character or a city

Just tell me what you want, I'll send some clarifying questions, and We can get right into it!

I am by no means an expert, but I love helping and I know a lot about Cliches, critiques, tropes, and dialogue! I am also very Excitable and Passionate about storytelling, so if I go off on a ramble, feel free to shut me down or ask me to stop and I will, no hard feelings at all!

That's all! I would also like to Schedule these, in case I have more than one, because I would LOVE to give each and every one of you who ask my full attention

To apply for this, Just... send me an ask or a DM, or comment or reblog this post asking about times, or telling me to DM or ask first!

AND YES, I HAVE THE FREE WILL, AND I CAN AND WILL REJECT HELPING WITH STORIES I AM UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE CONCEPT OF, I WILL MAKE MY BOUNDARIES CLEAR

Love you! Have a wonderful day! <33

@thewritingautisticat @yolbert @vyuntspakhkite-l-darling @ambersky0319 @lunaeuphternal

@an-indecisive-nerd @homelessnerd @vesanal @thebookishkiwi @write-with-will

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@tiredpapergirl @whatwewrotepodcast @busybussinbee @urnumber1star

[lesbianherald]

hiii I’m curious : what’s your process for creating your stories? like character development, plotting, creating arcs, etc?

thank you for asking !!! i'm going to get way longer and more thorough about this than necessary I feel it in my bones so I'm going to read more this now (I included a few tidbits from my miro board for carry the blade :) )

it's such a mixed bag ! part of this is my adhd lmao, and part of it is because, genuinely, I think each story needs something different.

almost ALWAYS (with one rare exception of a sci/fi fantasy world I've been building for years) I start with character, especially in original work. Because character is everything it's who we're following it's what the audience/readership will grab onto. Usually I have a basic premise and setting already there, but I don't build on it until I get to know who we're dealing with in the story. And then after building up the premise, setting, and plot I do even more character work after.

sometimes.... sometimes I get really impatient to start and start writing half way through the planning process. But anyways.

so I come up with character. do the basics. think about what their deal is. What is the journey they need to have, the lesson they need to learn, what themes and emotions do I want to explore with this character? Why is she important to me? Why will she be important to others?

I also think a lot about relationships

i just wrote a coming of age dramatic comedy for instance, and for that one, I broke up the story into my protagonists relationships. Wrote out the arc/story of each relationship and then combined each of these arcs into the key points that made up the film. Each relationship I wanted to be relevant to her grieving process, as she had just lost her mother. IDK if that makes sense. I wish I could show you but unfortunately I cannot.

for fic its honestly similar, but we already know character, so I usually ask what about this character/these characters am I most excited to explore.

that being said, coming home came to me in the idea for what they'd be like in modern day, and then a single idea for a single scene - their first kiss in the lab. I wrote that first, then asked myself what the context I wanted to give it was. Of course, I changed it a little once I actually got to writing and fleshing out chapter eight.

but this fantasy fic i'm writing is a fun example. I'm building out a lot. I'm building out characters, the world, the themes. - using visuals to help me kind of guide myself.

but because I have adhd and get impatient. I am outlining throughout this process to keep myself entertained. perhaps ideally you'd figure out everything first then outline then write but my brain just doesn't work that way.

in fics, especially, the relationship is so important that I really like to see how the obstacles they face, both due to their own psychology and internal pressures, can reflect the themes, create tension, etc.

but i also like to reflect on side characters too - their motivations and desires. So they don't just become like - flat little reflections of the central love story.

Finally, and this i learned from acting theory mostly - but I love it - is in each scene I like to think of what each character wants, what they are going to do to try and get that, and why they want it. In this fic, wants are something I also look at from a chapter by chapter basis.

side note - and i'm only saying this this far down so hopefully not too may people will see it - but I do have a secret subplot going on throughout the first half of this story that the audience doesn't know about.

in order to make this work I've been mapping out everything going on behind the scenes, and making sure they pair up well with events that people reading will see. it helps me plant little hints and seeds while hopefully not giving too much away (secret subplot in blue, actual story in red)

sorry i know this is such a ramble I just took my meds and had a double shot of expresso so I am buzzing right now lmao! Obviously I'm not the expert and there's not only one way. And also it really is so different for me every time. It's important to think about what the story actually calls for !

[kikyoupdates]

Changing Plotlines ⭑˚💞⭑ 𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑠

yandere!ocs x f!reader

yandere, reverse harem, yandere reverse harem, original characters x fem!reader, slowburn, isekai

A desperate cry on your deathbed leads to you being given a fresh start at life. You're overjoyed at having finally obtained a healthy body and a real chance at living normally, only to discover that you've been transported into a yandere game, where danger lurks at every corner. Determined to protect your new life at any cost, you vow to stay as far away from the major characters of the game as possible. But things don't always go as planned.

previous | story masterlist | next

When you arrived back at the manor, it was clear that you needed to get your shit in order.

The situation was crazy to begin with, but this newest revelation was something you just couldn’t wrap your head around. It was one thing to reincarnate into the past, or even in a separate world, given the very high likelihood of multiple galaxies existing. But this was just a game. It wasn’t real. So then, how was this possible?

Obviously, you didn’t have the answer to that question, and you weren’t even sure if you ever would find the answer. But that was really beside the point. It didn’t matter how you ended up here—what mattered was what in the hell you were going to do.

For the time being, you decided to lock yourself in your room and try to rack for your brain for just about everything you could remember. Thankfully, you’d just recently finished the game, so most of the details were still relatively fresh in your mind.

The most pressing issue was obviously that the game you found yourself in was by no means a happy one. It was marketed as a dark fantasy for a reason, because the love interests were dangerous and hardly good people. The yandere genre had become explosively popular over the course of the past decade. It was particularly enjoyable due to the strange thrill it provided people with, the mystery and suspense, but yanderes were far from desirable. The game had both a good and bad ending for each of the love interests, with all of the bad endings being remarkably messed up, and even the “good” endings were plenty concerning in their own right.

Which is why it was quite a bitter irony that the game was called Zodin’s Benevolence, given that there was nothing truly benevolent about the twisted challenges the protagonist was forced to undergo. She repeatedly found herself tangled up in all sorts of sinister plots after being adopted into a baron’s family and acquiring a noble status.

The good news was that you hadn’t been reincarnated as the protagonist, which meant that so long as you kept your distance from the main events of the storyline, there shouldn’t really be any reason for you to get dragged into that mess.

A grimace fell upon your lips. Thinking about it like that, it sounded a bit selfish to intentionally ignore a poor woman’s suffering, but you’d finally been given a chance at a proper life. The last thing you needed was to suffer a gruesome death at the hands of yanderes simply because you’d interfered with their twisted obsessions.

“I will do absolutely nothing,” you stated determinedly. “There’s no way my character even existed in the first place. When I woke up in this world, it sort of created a little slot for me to fit in. In other words, I’m a side character, and my actions should have no effect on the story so long as I don’t get involved.”

Yes, that was the plan. Do nothing. You could do that. You were very good at doing nothing.

The rules of this “game” you found yourself in—both literally and figuratively—were rather simple. Actually, there was only one rule at all, and that was to stay as far away from the protagonist and yanderes as possible. Which, given that you’d accidentally run into Cassius today, meant that you already weren’t off to a very good start. But a simple bump-in shouldn’t be reason enough for him to go after you with a vengeance. Apart from deliberating angering him, the only thing you could of think that would incur his wrath would be to prevent him from interacting with the game’s protagonist.

Speaking of... how far into the game am I at this point?

The game began with the protagonist being adopted by a kind baron after dutifully waiting on him during one of his trips to the countryside. She then proceeded to move into his estate, getting acquainted with her new life, and promptly beginning lessons at the renowned academy in Zodite’s capital city, as per her adoptive father’s wishes to grant her a formal education. This was the catalyst that set the plot in motion, because it was at the academy that the protagonist met the first yandere—none other than Cassius himself.

As far as you could recall, Zodin’s Benevolence began sometime early summer, because the baron encountered the protagonist while in the middle of a leisurely seasonal trip. Given how warm the weather currently was, summer was either peeking right around the corner, or already here. Which meant that there likely wasn’t much time left until the official plot was set in motion.

Although you had no concrete benchmark as to when it would officially begin, one thing was for sure. If you wanted to avoid an early death again, you would need to keep your eyes peeled for the protagonist’s appearance and keep her away from you by any means.

You frowned, nibbling on your bottom lip.

It’s okay. I can be selfish. No, I have to be selfish. It’s the only way.

Dying from illness was one thing, but the things those crazy bastards were capable of... you had a feeling that dying by their hands would be a million times more painful than anything you’d ever endured.

This new life had been placed right in the palms of your hands, and you’d be damned if you were going to let go of it.

“Mom, dad. Do you think it would be alright if I stopped going to the academy?”

After having discovered that you were in a yandere dating sim, that was the question you chose to ask your parents the very next morning.

Naturally, they were completely flabbergasted.

“Is this another one of your jokes? You wanted to go to school so badly up until now. Sorry, we’re just struggling to understand where all this is coming from.”

It had been your hope that in not attending the academy, you could prevent any run-ins with both the protagonist and the yanderes. But truthfully, you did want to go to school, because your sickness had prevented you from actually attending college back in your old world. It sounded like the version of you in this world was interested in pursuing an education as well, so perhaps it was for the best that you went. You couldn’t stand to see your parents’ disappointed expression once more, even in this reality.

From what you recalled seeing in the game, the campus was quite large, so if you were cautious, there was no reason for you to get wrapped up with the yanderes.

That being said...

You still didn’t want to be ill-prepared for what this world had to offer. There was only so much that had been outright stated in the game; you would have to find out the rest for yourself. One of the key points that you wanted to look into was the usage of magic. In this world, magic was mainly used through magical ores, which helped to supply certain buildings with things like electricity, heat, and even reinforcing walls with something akin to a barrier. Some people were blessed with magical abilities themselves, although it was exceedingly rare. The topic of mages had been briefly touched upon in the game, and it seemed as though with every passing generation, fewer and fewer people found themselves capable of such feats. Dwindling bloodlines, or something like that.

It did make you curious, though. Was it at all possible that you might be fortunate enough to be a mage yourself? If so, you could train your abilities to make sure that you would be able to protect yourself from harm in the event that something really did go wrong.

You didn’t really know how to use magic, though. After all, the game didn’t exactly expand on this detail very much.

So, you tried various methods to see if you could channel some hidden power. Reciting cringy incantations, straining your body so hard that it made you feel like you had to rush to the bathroom—you even drew a horribly misshapen pentagram on the floor of your bedroom, with leftover jam from your breakfast, and Lizbell nearly fainted when she saw the mess.

Needless to say, none of it worked, so you decided to just come out and ask.

“Can I use magic?”

For the second time that same morning, your parents gaped at you.

“My dear, what’s the matter?” your father chuckled. “You’ve been going full throttle since yesterday. Your mother and I can hardly keep up.”

“Does that mean I can’t use magic?”

“Of course not, good heavens. You know very well we don’t come from a family of mages.”

Despite their immediate dismissals, you knew that it was possible for people to potentially grow into their magical powers. Magical ability was traditionally passed down by blood, but it could just as easily manifest in an unsuspecting individual. Hopefully, that individual was you.

“I haven’t been able to use magic up until now, but something may have changed recently,” you persisted. “That’s what I meant. I’m wondering if my abilities have awakened by now.”

Fortunately, your parents had always been the patient sort, so they merely shrugged their shoulders. “If you're really still holding out hope for a thing, then you can always go and get tested at the Bureau of Magic.”

You decided to do just that. The Bureau of Magic’s central headquarters was a large, impressive building. You didn’t really know anything about this organization, but you were tickled pink by the thought of being magically gifted on top of having perfect health. You could already imagine it, shooting fireballs from your hands and creating geysers out of nothing.

You were going to be the best mage ever—

“Zero magical affinity,” the man testing you stated. “Although there are cases where people may develop magic over time, by looking at your mana reservoir, I can tell that there is absolutely no chance of you ever becoming a mage.”

Well, that was certainly a short-lived dream.

The man then frowned, peering closer into the strange device he was measuring your aptitude with. “Come to think of it though, this is really strange. Even average citizens have very trace amounts of mana in their system. Mana is present in all living things, whether or not they can actually manifest that mana and convert it into magical energy. I’ve never seen a case like yours before, not in all my years of working here. You’re an anomaly. Almost as if you aren’t meant to be a part of this world...”

Uh-oh. It sounded like he was starting to get suspicious, so you hurried to wave him off. “Your machine must be broken,” you dismissed flippantly. “Anyways, I’ve already lost interest in becoming a mage, so I’ll just have to take your word for it.”

“What? Miss, if you could just—”

“Gotta go, bye!”

Since magic was clearly a no-go, you figured you should at least have another plan to fall back onto. You were weak and sickly back in your previous life, but you had a perfectly healthy body in this one. There was no reason you couldn’t pick up a weapon and learn how to protect yourself. For instance, sword-fighting!

“You want to do what?” your parents blanched. It was the third time today that they were confused beyond belief, though they looked particularly horrified in this instance.

“Sword-fighting,” you repeated calmly. “I just think it’d be neat.”

“Oh, [Name], but why that of all things? Those blades are seriously dangerous, you know. You could hurt yourself!”

“Well, not if I’m good at it.”

“Someone in your position will never have to worry about their safety,” they insisted. “We can hire more guards to keep watch outside the manor if it’ll help you feel better. Come on now, what use have you for a weapon like that?”

“It’s not that I’m worried about my safety.” That’s a lie. “I just want to challenge myself and see if I can do this. Plus, I think it’d be pretty amazing if I could pull something like this off. I’d be bragging about it constantly.” Okay, that part isn’t entirely a lie.

Their reluctance was plain as day, but as expected—they just couldn’t seem to say no to you.

“Very well,” your father sighed. “But we’ll at least be hiring an instructor to ensure that you have someone watching over you and making sure you’re safe while you train. Please allow us at least this much.”

“Yeah, that’s fine!” you beamed. “I’ll learn faster with a teacher, anyways.”

So far, things were looking good. You had your plan to stay out of everyone’s way and make sure you didn’t become a target, and in the event that it all failed, you would at least have some way of fighting for your life.

“Oh, and uh, the sooner the better,” you said. “I’d like to start learning as early as possible, since I’m just so excited! Okay? Okay!”

You proceeded to skip out the room before they could mutter a protest.

It was actually incredible how much your parents loved you. They were parents from a different reality, but your parents nonetheless. In spite of their visible concerns to allow you to wield a sword, they’d managed to secure you a personal instructor in less than twenty-four hours.

Currently, you were out in the courtyard, eagerly awaiting your guest. You were dressed in a loose tunic and comfortable pants that were perfecting for working up a sweat in. It was a shame you couldn’t wear clothes like these more often, though you had to admit that your collection of dresses was rather delightful.

It was hot out. Definitely summer, you were sure of it now. It was a good thing you were starting your sword-fighting lessons so early on. Even if you never ending up needing your soon-to-be lethal skills, you would definitely feel more at ease knowing that you had them.

Your personal instructor was apparently a knight, so you were already inclined to trust that he had hands-on experience. You wondered what he’d look like. Knights in fantasy settings like this one were always so damn attractive. Hopefully he wasn’t much older than you...

Ah, focus, goddammit! What does it matter what he looks like? The most important thing is staying alive.

You lightly slapped yourself upside the head. Right. No distractions. You were no longer the same weak person from your miserable previous life. You were a living miracle, and a future sword-wielding badass.

Hardly a minute later, your tortuous wait seemed to have come to an end, and you were able to get a good look at your new instructor.

Wait, is that...

“Good day, Lady [Name],” the knight greeted, bowing his head courteously. “My name is Sergei Garin, member of the Cavalry Brigade. I am humbled to be in your service.”

You couldn’t quite seem to hide the shock on your face. Sergei Garin. You knew this character. Fortunately, he wasn’t one of the yanderes—otherwise, you would’ve probably feigned a heart attack to get out of this situation. No, he was nothing but a supporting character, although a character that you admittedly had a soft spot for.

Why did you have a soft spot for him? Well...

Probably because he was fated to die.

More chapters are available on Quotev!

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[winchesterwild78]

Unspoken Words pt 6

Master List

Characters: Jensen Ackles x Reader, Reader’s daughter, other characters

Warnings: fluff, attempted kidnapping, anxiety, almost smut, nightmares

A/N: Another collab story with @cheekygirl2309. This one is about a single mother with a nonverbal autistic daughter who loves Supernatural. The reader is going to a Supernatural Convention with her daughter and things unfold from there. The daughter character is near and dear to my heart. I have someone very close to me who is nonverbal, but he’s such an amazing kid. 

*This series is about to wrap up. Enjoy one of the last few chapters.*

This is a work of fiction and does not depict real life. Jensen is single in this story. 

All work is my own and @cheekygirl2309, don’t take it or use it as your own. Reblogs and likes are appreciated. 

Minors DNI 18+

The next day after the post from Jensen about our relationship, he suggested I put my profile private or create a public one. He said most of the cast have two, one for the fans and one for friends and family. 

He showed me his personal profile and I chuckled. “I had no idea you had a secret account. Now I see why you don’t post all the time.” 

He laughed, “Yeah. I guess I didn’t forget my password after all.” He winked.

I wanted to take advantage of the nice day and take Lily to the park. Jensen’s interior designer and her team were going by his house today, so we needed to pass some time. 

Jensen helped me load up the car and get Lily ready. She clung to his neck as he carried her to the car. 

“Jensen, you know she can walk.” I laughed as I saw him carrying her. “Yeah I know, but she needs to save her energy for the park.” 

I playfully rolled my eyes. “Uhhuh, okay.” 

Jensen put Lily in the car and we both climbed in. Putting the car in drive we headed toward the park and Jensen took my hand in his. 

“First time out since we went public, are you ready for this?” I took a shaky breath, “Yeah. I’m ready.” 

Arriving at the park I noticed a lot of people there. I got Lily out and held her hand. Jensen grabbed the bag. 

I noticed a few stares and some pictures taken of us. I tried to shield Lily. 

A few people approached Jensen and asked for pictures and he was polite. “Sure, just please keep her out of the pictures. We don’t want her face all over the internet.” I smiled. He was talking about Lily. 

A little girl ran up to us and squealed, calling Lily’s name. “Lily!” It was a little girl from her class, Tara. “Well hey, Tara. How are you? Where’s your mama?” “Hey Ms Y/N. Mama’s over there.”

She pointed to the bench near the swings. “Can Lily go play with me?” She asked. I nodded, “Yeah. Y’all stay close.” 

Jensen and I walked over to Tara’s mom. When she saw me she jumped up and hugged me. “Hey, Y/N! I haven’t seen you in forever. How have you been?” 

I smiled, “I’ve been good. Tara just grabbed Lily. They took off to play. Jessica I want to introduce you to my boyfriend, Jensen. Jensen, this is Jessica. Tara’s mother.” 

She blushed and smiled. “Nice to meet you Jensen. I’ve been a fan for years.” 

“Nice to meet you too, Jessica.” 

The three of us sat on the bench chatting and watching the girls play. 

I lost sight of the girls for a moment and started to panic a bit, but they both came into sight and I relaxed. 

Jensen put his hand on my leg and leaned in. “She’s okay, baby. I can see her.” I nodded. 

I wanted Lily to play like a regular child, but I often worried due to her lack of vocabulary. Tara had always been so sweet to Lily and was a great friend to her. I was so grateful for her. 

A few minutes later Tara came running up, panic in her voice. “Mama, Ms Y/N a man grabbed Lily. She tried to get away but he grabbed her.” 

Before I could react Jensen was off the bench and on the other side of the playground. He heard Lily scream. “Dada!” He saw her reaching out for him and being carried away by a man. 

Jensen grabbed the man and pulled Lily from his arms. 

I ran to his side and grabbed Lily and Jensen punched the guy in the face. He subdued him until the cops came. 

I gasped when I realized who it was, David. I saw red. “David?! What the fuck were you trying to do?!” 

I punched him in the face and the cops pulled me back. “Ma’am you have to calm down.” “Like hell I will. This asshole tried to kidnap my daughter. He better be glad all I did was punch him in the face.” 

Jensen pulled me into his arms, holding Lily and I both. “Baby, come on. We don’t need you to go to jail either.” 

Lily was shaking and crying. Jensen pulled her into his arms, “Come here baby girl. I’ve got you. You’re safe, baby.”

The police let us go after taking our statements. They charged David with attempted kidnapping. He tried to protest and tell the cops she’s his daughter. I told them he’s not on her birth certificate and he hasn’t been in her life at all. The police said since he doesn’t have custody it’s still considered kidnapping, so they took him to jail. 

Jensen took us back to his house and made lunch. Lily was still shaken and I was filled with rage and fear. 

Jensen leaned down and kissed my lips. “Hey, look at me. She’s safe, okay.” 

I looked up at him and softly smiled, “I know and it’s because of you. You ran and got to her in time. Jensen I don’t know how to thank you for that. I don’t know what I would have done if he took her.” 

He cupped my face, “Baby you don’t have to worry about that anymore. You and Lily mean everything to me and I’ll always protect you two. I love you both. I love her like she’s my own and I would have walked through hell to keep her safe. Now come on, let’s show our baby girl her new bedroom. It’s ready.” 

I smiled, kissed his lips and nodded. 

“Hey Lily, your new bed is here. Do you want to take a look at it?” Jensen asked with a grin. She squealed and leaped into Jensen’s arms. 

We walked to her room and when Jensen opened the door I gasped. Her brand new bedroom set was there, along with a gorgeous pink area rug and Jensen had a mural painted on the wall to make it look like the carriage was on its way to the castle. Inside the closet was every princess dress and accessory you could think of and there was a white and pink vanity in the corner. 

“Jensen, this is too much. I can’t believe you did this for her.” He smiled and I swear he puffed out his chest a little with pride. “Nope, it's not too much. It’s perfect for my baby girl. She’s a princess and deserves a princess room.” 

Lily squealed and started playing with the new toys and clothes. Jensen snaked his arms around me and pulled my back flush to his chest. 

“Jensen, this is amazing. You’re amazing. She’s never going to want to leave here now.” He kissed the side of my head, “Well maybe she doesn’t have to.” 

I turned and looked at him. “What?” “Why don’t you two move in with me. I have a great security system, Lily has her new room, and you can decorate our room however you want.” 

I bit my lip, “I don’t know Jensen. That’s a big deal. Can I think about it?” “Of course darlin’. Are you two still going to California with me?” 

I nodded, “Yeah. I think after all of this it’ll be good to get away for a bit.” Jensen held me tight, “Good. I can’t wait, and we can see what it’s like living together while we are there and you can use that to help with your decision.” “Good thinking, Jensen.” I kissed his lips and he deepened the kiss. 

Lily was lost in her own world playing in her room. Jensen and I left after a few minutes and headed back downstairs. 

He was due back in California in two days, so he looked at adding Lily and I to his flight. Lily had never been on a plane and I was worried. Jensen worked his magic and was able to secure two tickets in first class on the same flight he was on. 

“Jensen, we don’t need first class.” I huffed. He cupped my face, “Baby, you and Lily deserve so much and this way I can be there to help you with her on the plane.” I nodded, “Okay, but you’ve got to stop spending so much money on us. It’s not right.” 

He looked at me, green eyes full of love, “Baby, if we were married it would be our money, not mine. Please let me take care of you two.” 

I placed my hands on his chest, “Jensen I just don’t want you to spend so much on us. I’m not used to this, and if I’m being honest it scares me. I don’t want you or anyone to think I’m with you for your money.” 

He placed a soft kiss on my lips, “Baby, I don’t think that and screw what everyone else thinks.” I chuckled, “Okay, but please try to stop.” 

He smirked, “I can’t make any promises, sweetheart. Hey, I have an idea. Since we head out in a few days, why don’t you and Sarah go out for a girls night.” 

I smiled, “I’d love that, Jensen, but what about Lily? I can’t ask Annie to watch her on short notice.” “I’ll watch her. She can stay here with me and when you get back you and I can have some alone time.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me. 

“If you’re sure. I’ll see if she’s able to go out tonight.” He pulled me close, “I’m sure baby. You go have some fun and I’ll be waiting for you.” 

I called Sarah and she was excited about going out. I got ready and told Lily I was going out with Aunt Sarah and she was staying with Jensen. 

“Dada?” “Yes, baby. You’re staying with dada.” It made my heart swell anytime she called Jensen dada. Part of me hoped he’d want the job. 

Walking downstairs Jensen saw me and whistled. “Damn I’m one lucky man. You look amazing, baby.” My cheeks flushed red, “Thank you Jensen.” 

Sarah rang the doorbell and Jensen answered it. She took one look at me and gasped, “Damn girl. Love looks good on you.” I shook my head and giggled pulling her into a hug. 

“Are you ready?” I asked her as I grabbed my stuff. “Yep.” I hugged Lily goodbye and gave Jensen a kiss. 

“Go have fun, and don’t worry about us. We will be fine.” I nodded and Sarah and I left. 

The uber brought me home about 1am and I toptoed in the house. When I walked in I noticed the television was on, the volume was low. 

Walking over to the couch I saw Jensen laying on his back, one arm under his head and the other holding Lily. She was snuggled up next to him with her squirrel and moose stuffy. 

My heart swelled. Then I saw a picture Lily drew. She drew a picture of Me, her, and Jensen and we were all holding hands. At the top she wrote “mama, dada, Lily”. 

I snapped a picture of the two of them. I didn’t think I could love him more, but seeing him holding her and protecting her made my heart so full. 

Jensen stirred and his green eyes fluttered open. I smiled softly at him. “Hey baby. Let me take her to bed.” I kissed his lips and picked up Lily, carrying her to her bedroom. 

I turned on the lamp Jensen bought her and it filled the room with a soft pink light. I chuckled, she definitely has him wrapped around her finger. 

Walking back downstairs I found Jensen sitting up and waiting for me.

“Did you have a good time, sweetheart?” I sat beside him, “Yeah I did. Did you?” “Yeah, we had a great time. Lily told me she wants you two to move in here with me so we can be a real family.” 

I smirked, “Oh did she now? She said all that to you?” He laughed, “Yeah, she did. See, look at the picture she drew. It’s proof.” 

I took the paper in hand, “Yeah, I see it. Come on, let’s go to bed.” 

He locked up the house and the two of us went to our bedroom. 

Closing the bedroom door, Jensen’s arms snaked around my body and turned me to face him. His lips ghosted mine, “I want you baby.” 

I smiled, “I’m all yours.” Jensen guided me back to the bed and laid me down slowly. His lips never leaving mine. 

He hovered over me, his strong arms caging me between him and the bed. I looked up into his eyes and saw so much love it made my breath hitch. 

His hand softly touched my face, “I love you so much, Y/N.” I swallowed the lump in my throat. Tears pricked my eyes and slowly fell.

“Hey, shh. What’s wrong baby?” His thumb wiped the tears away. I bit my lip, “I’m sorry, Jensen. I’m just so in love with you. These aren’t sad tears. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, what I did to deserve your love, but I’m so thankful I did it. I never thought I’d meet a man like you, let alone someone who accepted Lily and loved her too.” 

He smiled, “Hey, you both have me forever. I’m not going anywhere.” 

I chuckled, “Great, you were trying to have sex and I started crying. That’s just perfect.” We both laughed. 

“Hey, who said we were finished.” Jensen kissed my lips and worked his way down my neck and to my chest. 

I leaned up and he pulled my shirt off. “Jens, I need you baby.” 

His hands traced every curve, every imperfection, and his lips trailed over my body. Marking me and making me his.

Jensen was gentle every time we made love, but something was different tonight. 

I felt like I was the only person that mattered to him. Nothing was rushed, every movement perfectly executed. Our breaths mingled together as our bodies became one. 

His hands were in mine and his lips pressed against mine. 

We were so wrapped up in the moment we forgot protection. When Jensen came his seed coated my insides and my body pulled every bit of it out. 

Jensen got up and cleaned us both. He pulled me into his arms and kissed my head. “I love you so much, Y/N.” “I love you too, Jensen.” 

We drifted off to sleep. My sleep restless, replaying the events of the day with Lily and David. My dreams plagued with the images of him taking her and me not getting to her in time. 

I heard her crying in my sleep. In my groggy state I thought it was just my imagination, but then I felt Jensen leap out of bed and run to her room. 

I realized I wasn’t dreaming. When I made it to her room, Jensen had her in his arms holding her and calming her down. I leaned against the doorway watching as he chased her fears away and wrapped her in the safety of his arms.

She looked terrified and clung to him. He laid down beside her, and softly sang to her. One song after another, and I saw her relax against him. 

His voice was like a balm on her heart, easing her pain and calming her. The melodic sounds that filled the room lulled her back to sleep. Lily’s breathing evened out and her face relaxed. 

When Jensen was sure she was asleep again he tucked her in, making sure her stuffies were next to her, and her blanket was around her. 

I smiled up at him. He smiled and took my hand. Leading me back to our room. 

“Jensen, that was incredible. You were made to be a father, you know that.” He kissed my lips, “Yeah, it’s something I’ve always wanted. Now with Lily I get the chance. She’s an incredible kid and I’m grateful I get to be part of her life. Now, we have a busy day ahead of us, let’s try and get some sleep.” 

He wrapped me in his arms and started humming. I smiled against his chest. I took a deep breath and slowly let it out, letting the stress of the day wash away. 

The next morning we were all up early and getting last minute things ready for our flight. The detective in charge of the case called Jensen and told him David made bail, but there was a restraining order against him. His next court date was next month, and we had to be there. Jensen thanked him and told me not to worry about anything. His attorney would prepare us and let us know what we needed to do. Lily, thank goodness, wouldn't have to go to court. 

The rest of the day was spent getting packed and making sure Lily was ready for the trip. She’d never been away from home and I was very nervous. 

I had made a list of everything and I kept checking it over and over. I sat on the bed, looking over the list again and Jensen chuckled from the doorway. “What’s so funny?” I smirked at him. “You are, come here.” He pulled me up and into his arms. “She’s going to be just fine. She has us, and her stuffies.” He cupped my face in his hands and placed a kiss on my lips, “I promise.” 

I took a shaky breath in, “I know, I just..” He cut me off with another kiss. “Jensen..”, again another kiss. “Are you just …” another kiss. I laughed. “See, now don’t you feel better?” I smiled, rolled my eyes and nodded. 

Lily walked in our room with her stuffies in hand, looked up at Jensen and said, “Dada, Lily, Mama, air.” Jensen nodded, “Yes, baby. We’re going on a plane tomorrow.” She held up her squirrel and moose stuffies and said, “Sam, Dean too.” Jensen laughed, “Yes, Sam and Dean too.” 

Lily squeezed them tightly and hugged Jensen. I leaned down to her, “Lily, baby, go grab your princess bag so we can make sure your stuffies are packed and other things you need.” 

She ran to her room and came back with the princess carry-on bag Jensen had bought her. I opened it up and found her princess dresses and accessories stuffed in it. 

I laughed, “Lily honey, we can’t take all this with us. If we do there won’t be any room for your stuffies.” She nodded, grabbed the bag and ran back to her room. When she came back it was empty. 

“Okay, Lily, put Sam and Dean in the bag.” She clung to them and refused to move. “Sweetie, we have to pack them so we don’t forget them.” Still, she refused to move. 

I took a deep breath, “Okay, well it will be your responsibility to put them in the bag tomorrow morning then.” She nodded. I was worried she’d forget.

Jensen leaned over and whispered in my ear, “Don’t worry sweetheart, I won’t let her forget them.” He winked as he pulled away. 

The next morning was a whirlwind getting out the door and to the airport. Lily made sure her stuffies were tucked away safely in her bag. Jensen double checked, just to make sure. We were able to board the plane first. One reason was Jensen’s celebrity status, and the other was Lily’s autism. The flight crew were so sweet with her. She got to meet the pilots and received a pair of wings for her and her stuffies. 

When it was time for take off she wanted to sit in my lap, but I had to explain to her she couldn’t. She started to get upset and I was sure she was about to have a meltdown. 

Before we got ready to head down the runway to take off, Jensen switched seats with me and held onto Lily. His presence beside her comforted her enough she forgot about wanting to sit in my lap. 

I was in awe of him again. He looked over at me and smiled and took my hand in his. “See, we’ve got this, together. I’m not going anywhere.” 

My heart fluttered in my chest. At that moment I knew without a shadow of a doubt I was going to marry that man. 

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[bonaesperanza]

I saw a similar post that I can't find right now where one of the replies introduced the concept of narrative porosity.

Basically, it's not about how good the piece of media is, it's about how many threads it leaves for you to pick up and follow up on (or how many holes it has for you to fill, hence the word "porosity"). A sort of fandom equivalent to affordances in developmental psych.

If a piece of media has resolved all its character arcs and subplots and dealt satisfyingly with all its narrative themes it leaves you nothing to do. It's all tied in a bow and you can't add anything without ruining it. Lots of more highbrow media is like that because these are things something like, say, litfic or an Oscar bait movie cares about: it has a small number of characters but their psyches are explored to exhaustion and the themes are usually done well because that's litfic's Thing. (That's what makes it good, while Fast & Furious is beloved less for its intricate characterization and more for its excellent car chase sequences.)

OTOH a CW show will have straggling plot threads and characters that appear and disappear ad hoc and themes that get dropped after two seasons and minor characters that are given certain traits for variety but that turn out to have fascinating psychological implications. Mediocre media has lots of threads to pick up on because it's shoddily made and therefore undersaturated with meaning by default.

BUT that's not the only way to have narrative porosity.

Worldbuilding that only hints at certain areas of the world or gives loads of information you can expand on also increases narrative porosity because that also gives you threads to pick up on. You wouldn't call LOTR mediocre but it has a huge fandom for exactly this reason - you get to flesh out all the random blorbos from the appendices or whatever.

This is also why media dealing with institutions and hierarchies and life within them does well - it gives you scaffolding to create your own iterations on those contexts, e.g. making your own Jedi or wizard or shinigami or waterbender OC or writing about the previous or next generation or whatever. The worldbuilding is basically a grid template where only the boxes for the main characters have been filled. OTOH if I wanted to write fic for, say, the movie Anora, I can only do that by featuring the characters of Anora, otherwise it's just a story set in New York.

Having a plot-oriented piece of media means that in-depth exploration of the characters' psyche doesn't fit the genre/format, but if your thing lasts more than like three hours your characters will behave in ways and react to things and if you've made them even the least bit humanlike that can be inferred to hint at hidden depths. Tantalizing glimpses of more complex characterizations that are never paid off in canon also create porosity, because they also leave unaddressed straggling threads. There's tension there, room for a theme or a character arc that the OG writer(s) haven't put in.

I'd argue that having characters and plots fit into easily comprehensible archetypes that are relatively detached from the setting also fits because it gives you AU potential. I recently had a talk on an ASOIAF discord server about how difficult it'd be to make a modern AU version of Theon Greyjoy, because his entire personality and mindset have been shaped by the medieval institution of sending relatives as hostages to guarantee your good behavior it'd be very hard to transplant that without losing a huge chunk of his character and motivations. OTOH more universal character beats or traits: abusive parents, star crossed love, overachieving, yearning for adventure, etc. are easier to play with by making various iterations across various settings. Luke Skywalker could be a random dude from Appalachia and he could have all the character beats from the OG movies - yearning for adventure, coming into his own, encountering his estranged father who turns out to be a dick. This can happen in Ancient Greece or in Alberta, Canada or in the Horn of Africa.

The dissatisfaction people talk about is recognizing that picking up some of the threads I described above would have made for a stronger work, or at least one more interesting to you. They're unresolved and frustratingly so, they're an annoying empty hole asking you to fill it. There's a connection that could be made but wasn't. The work isn't saturated enough with meaning, or a specific thread you care about a lot hasn't been addressed.

You can also connect the work's unresolved threads with other threads inside your head - e.g. I think I would make blorbo happy (readerfic) or I think blorbo would get along with character from fandom Y or whatever. E.g. I'm obsessed with the idea of a modern AU of The Count of Monte Cristo, because I see a novel written by a mixed race man about a man twisted by unjust imprisonment and I think about the modern prison industrial complex and what it does to minorities, and I also see the lavish wish fulfillment descriptions of fast boats and cool clothes and lavish furniture and people being judged on "taste" and I think about the cottage industry that analyzes every expensive object that's ever appeared in Succession and I think a Monte Cristo modern AU would be a crowdpleaser that I would LOVE to see. That's a thread I've connected to something entirely outside the original novel that's relevant and fun to me.

OTOH I think there's a type of work that says very little in the actual text but wields its blank spaces so masterfully that you get this feeling that trying to fill them would make everything worse. The blank spaces already have meanings.

Challengers for example - a lot of its artistry is in expertly wielding the tension, in choosing what to show you and where to cut off. It does feel saturated with meaning even though it leaves so much unsaid because the "narrative whitespace" takes on a meaning of its own, like the arrow in the FedEx logo can only possibly be an arrow. It's hands down my favourite movie of the year, but I'm lowkey kind of scared to look up fic for it in case I ruin it somehow. I feel like extending the narrative beyond the movie's ending would make things less thematically resolved, like adding things to the FedEx logo might.

A lot of my favourite book series play with unreliable narrators and characters' perceptions and what is said and what is implied, and it feels almost crass to break up the way the whitespace in them is set up. I dunno, it feels like easy pickings to write a fic explicitly describing how the Regent abused Laurent from CaPri, or Gen and Irene's first night as a couple for Queen's Thief, or Lymond breaking down emotionally for the Lymond Chronicles. Like circling the FedEx arrow with a red pen and writing "arrow underneath". It kind of kills the tension, because you can already make out the shape of the missing piece from the canon, and writing it point blank kills the delicious tension in it, and perhaps even obscures the meaning and characterisation that was built into the way certain things were not said.

Sorry for the wall of text this is just a really fascinating subject for me

also this might be an unpopular opinion, but i think MOST people are actually completely able to "consume" a piece of a media without anaylzing it through a shipping lense, but i just think they than aren't likely to be posting that analysis on archiveofourown. i think for the most people what's happening is that people are like. going on fandom websites and communities and getting really annoyed they're seeing too much yaoi or whatever, and it's like there's alot of fast food at mcdonalds too, i'm sure the people eating there don't have anything else going on in there lives either

[aptbelle]

FOREST BOY

pairing: earthfairy!jun x female!reader

summary: y/n was a lonely little girl. she had no friends, just her imagination and the forest behind her home to get her through the day. the forest is where she’d run to to escape reality and day dream. one day, after running from her bullies, she meets a strange, yet charming boy, wen junhui. junhui shows her what lies deeper in the forest, and she is amazed. every single day, she goes to the forest just to see junhui, and they spend hours together. one thing y/n had noticed about junhui was that she never saw him outside of the forest, nor did he have any interest in leaving. they spend every day together until y/n has to go away for college. the news breaks junhui’s heart, and he goes away, which hurt y/n in return. four years later, y/n lands a job in her hometown, allowing her to come back home. she is excited to see junhui again, but he is nowhere to be seen, no matter how far in the forest she travels. however, she meets another boy, who is very similar to junhui, or so y/n thinks.

warnings: this story only includes jun and minghao! they are characters in this and not related to the ones irl. lower case intended! this story may have possible angst!

author's note: this is a story i had started on wattpad a couple years ago, but i never published it. so i decided to continue it on here! i hope you enjoy! i am a student, so i will update as much as i can while juggling school.

previous chapter: prologue

next chapter:

CHAPTER 1: HOME SWEET HOME

4 years later…

y/n never realized how blurry the train made the outside world look. the first time she took one on her way to college, she was occupied by a book the whole time. having finished all her books, she was left with nothing to read. she had her headphones on and was taking in the scenery of her hometown.

it’s been years since she came home, with school and summer internships she was very busy. all the hard work had finally paid off, she was finally graduated and began her career for her local newspaper, writing blogs about whatever the managers tell her. her first task was writing a nature article. this allowed her to be able to stay at home, for once.

she felt so guilty for not visiting more, but her parents had busy schedules as well, so hopefully they understood.

it was the end of spring, so everything was in full bloom. y/n had missed all the trees and flowers. her college town was nothing but city; the closest garden was too far for y/n to even consider walking. she reminisced about her childhood and teenage days she spent in the forest, with nothing but her thoughts and wen junhui to keep her company.

wen junhui.

y/n felt her heart skip. junhui. the boy she spent almost every hour with. she hadn’t thought about him in awhile. he was the reason she loved everything about nature. he taught y/n all she knows about the forest. she had created so many memories with him between those trees.

she could not wait to see him again.

y/n remembered how she left him, without a good explanation. she hoped he had come around, and would be happy upon her return.

though it was going by fast, y/n began to recognize the scenery around her. she was almost at her local train station. the stop would be any minute. she paused her music and put her phone away into her purse. she took her headphones off of her ears and put them around her neck.

her luggage was in the overhead compartment. she didn’t have much, just her clothes. she knew her mother would have kept her room just the same. the extra stuff she had around her dorm, she sold for extra money.

just a few minutes later, the train slowed down. the blurred image outside the window became a clear show of the station. y/n stood up and grabbed her luggage’s. she looked around outside, and saw her mother standing there with a sign.

‘welcome home, y/n!’ the sign read. her mother was shaking it around with a smile. her mother was usually the strict type, but where y/n had not been home in a very long time, her mother showed a happier side.

y/n hurried into the middle aisle so that she would not be the last to leave the train. she finally reached the doors to the outside and stepped off the train onto the platform.

she turned her head and instantly saw her mother running towards her.

“my sweet, y/n!” she exclaimed. she wrapped her arms around y/n. y/n missed these hugs so much. it felt so warm and inviting, reminding her of old times.

“hello, mom,” y/n hugged back, putting her head into her mother’s neck.

“i am so glad you are back home,” her mother said, letting go of the hug and putting her hands on y/n’s shoulders. y/n noticed the tears in her eyes. “you look so mature,” her mother continued.

y/n doesn’t think she had changed her appearance that much. she did cut her hair and change her style a bit. then again, her mother hadn’t seen her other than video calls for a couple years.

“thank you, mama,” y/n replied. her mother hadn’t changed at all, aside from the slight gray peeking from her roots. y/n had always been told she was a spitting image of her mother, which was a compliment she always loved to hear.

“was the trip okay?” her mother asked, “i know train rides can get boring after a while.”

“yes, it was alright,” y/n said, “it was nice seeing everything after so long.”

her mother smiled and patted y/n’s arms. “that’s so good to hear.”

y/n’s mother grabbed her stuff. “the car is just this way. don’t worry about driving, i will let you rest.”

“thanks, mama,” y/n replied.

y/n followed her mother to the car. there was a crowd of people at the station. the mother and daughter pushed through the crowd until they reached outside. her mother led y/n just a few more steps until they found the car.

y/n’s mother popped the truck and carefully set her luggage in. y/n walked to the passenger side and opened the door. she was suddenly hit with a nostalgic smell. the car had always kept the clean, new-car scent that y/n had loved. she truly felt at home. she got in the car, shut the door, and strapped the seat belt.

seconds later, y/n’s mother got in, letting out a big sigh. “oh, y/n, i am just so happy you’re finally home,” she said, patting her daughters thigh.

“yes, it’s been far too long,” y/n agreed. her mother started the car and began to drive out of the parking lot. “i’m surprised you aren’t on one of your business trips right now,” y/n continued.

her mother slightly smiled. “i’m scheduled to leave for one tomorrow, and stay gone for a couple days.”

y/n looked down. she knew her mother was very busy, but she had just gotten home. this didn’t upset her, though, she was used to this. this did give her more time to herself. more time to spend in the woods.

more time to find junhui.

“what are you smiling so wide for?” y/n’s mother asked, interrupting her thoughts.

“nothing,” y/n said, “just excited to see an old friend, junhui.”

y/n’s mother furrowed her eyebrows. “y/n,” she said sternly, “i thought you would grow out of that. this ‘junhui’ boy doesn’t exist. you’re too old for this kind of imagination.”

oh, right.

y/n’s mother never believed her when she brought up junhui. y/n didn’t blame her. junhui would never want to come over for dinner, and would only come to her house late at night, never through the front door but through the window. he would always use the same excuse, that his parents didn’t want him going to strangers’ houses.

y/n never met his parents neither, or seen his house. the more she thought, she only ever saw him in the forest. he didn’t go to school, or to town. just the forest. she had always assumed he had been homeschooled. that’s the only reasonable explanation.

“he exists, mother,” y/n said, chuckling, “he was just super shy.”

“super shy and super odd,” her mother replied, “only staying in that forest. no wonder you didn’t get kidnapped.”

already with the scolding. y/n loved her mother, but she knows that junhui was real, no matter if her mother saw her or not.

“plus,” her mother continued, “i never saw him when i went to the forest for a walk. just dead trees. maybe he left when you did, along with the rest of your mind.”

y/n kept her mouth shut, not wanting to further draw out her so called ‘delusions.’ she’d introduce them one day, if junhui was still around, which she hoped.

“are you still planning on keeping in touch with your college friends? i know you said you had made a few,” her mother chimed in.

y/n did make a few friends, but none were too close. she had a roommate in college, but they were far from friends, polar opposites. she told her mother, however, that they were close as can be.

“they’re all busy with their careers,” y/n told her mom, “not much time to talk.”

“ah, i see,” her mother nodded.

before too long, the two reached their neighborhood. everything felt like nothing had changed. their house was in the far part of the neighborhood, so it took maybe another couple minutes to reach it.

it was a comforting two story, accompanied by the wonderous forest in the back. just the sight of the trees made y/n feel safe. so many memories, and more to be made.

“home sweet home!” y/n’s mother exclaimed, pulling up to the house. she put the car in park and unbuckled. “don’t wait too long, you’re room isn’t in perfect shape for nothing!” y/n’s mother hopped out of the car and shut the door. she went around the back and grabbed her daughters stuff before heading into the house.

y/n stepped out of the car as well, looking around at her surroundings. no major changes, but she did notice a car at one of the houses down the street. when y/n left, that house was for sale. standing outside of it was a man who looked to be about y/n’s age. he had a black mullet and glasses. it seemed he was tending to some plants in front of his house. he turned in y/n’s direction, flashed her a smile, and waved. y/n waved back, and he turned back to what he was doing. he had an attractive smile, one y/n would remember, but she had never seen him before.

she turned her focus back to her childhood home, and began to walk in. she opened the door and was greeted once again with a familiar smell. her mother’s favorite scent was vanilla-lavender. she always made sure the house smelt like it. every time she’d smell this scent outside of her home, it made her think of home. now she was finally there.

“go get settled into your room, honey,” her mother said, “i’ll be asleep before too long. i have to leave early in the morning.”

“okay, thank you, mom,” y/n said. she walked up to her mother and gave her a hug.

“y/n, thank you for coming back,” her mother said.

“of course, there’s no where i’d rather be.” y/n let go of the hug, grabbed her stuff, and walked up to her room.

it was the last room in the hall, closest to the back of the house and closest to the forest. the door was shut, and still had the ‘y/n’s room’ sign on the door surrounded by assorted stickers that she put there when she was a little girl. she opened the doors and was flooded with nostalgia.

the bed was still on the left side of the room doused in the blue bedsheets and matching comforter that feels like marshmallows. the bookshelf on the right side still had all the same books that y/n had read a dozen times. the desk next to it was oddly neat. y/n usually had some kind of mess going on on it. the window was placed perfectly in the middle. the window which jun had popped in on countless occasions. the window which y/n had always escaped with him out of. the window showed a perfect view of the forest. she was eager to go for a walk. she needed material for her first article anyways, and the forest would be a perfect spot to come up with ideas.

she needed to unpack first. she set her luggage up on her bed and unzipped it. she didn’t have too many outfits, but she had a lot of lounge clothes. she put all her outfits in the closet ans the random shirts and shorts in the drawers, along with the undergarments. she left one set of lounge clothes out: black t-shirt and grey sweats. she changed out of her current clothes and put the lounge set on. she put on a pair of sneakers she brought with her.

y/n’s door opened. her mother was standing outside.

“i’m heading to bed now, sweetie,” her mother said, “are you settling in nicely?”

“yes, everything’s just the same,” y/n said, “i was going to head out to the forest a bit, find something to write my first article about.”

her mother nodded. “well, if you see you’re imaginary friend, tell him i said hi,” she joked before leaving the room.

y/n hoped she saw her ‘imaginary’ friend. she missed him after all this time, and hoped he was still around. she had so much to tell him about, and she was sure he did as well.

y/n grabbed her laptop and headed out the room. she went downstairs and to the back door. she opened it and headed into the forest.

there had been a perfectly paved path that she’d always take. she had walked it so many times that the grass had never been able to grow there. looking around she had noticed the trees had new vines on them, new bushes had sprouted, trees had grown taller, but she knew it would always be the same forest she basically grew up in.

she walked farther and farther in until something caught her eye: a rose bush. roses were her favorite, and a perfect topic for her to write about. roses symbolized so many different things, and were the cause of many memories with jun, who never forget they were her favorite

—

“tag, you’re it!” junhui yelled as he tapped 14 year old y/n’s shoulder from behind. before y/n could fully turn around, jun had already sped off. he was a lot faster than she could ever be, which is why he loved to play tag.

“jun!” y/n chuckled as she began to run after him the best she could. he was so far ahead that he looked like a tiny speck. y/n’s one goal was to catch up to him, and that was all she was focused on.

not the fact that her shoelace was untied.

she sped her pace up, not taking her eyes off of jun. all of a sudden, she felt her shoe get caught. she looked down and saw that she had stepped on her shoelace, causing her to fall in front of her.

in front of her, unbeknownst to her, was a large rose bush filled with thorns. when she fell, she felt them all prick into her at once. some of the thorns were in her face, arms, and thighs. she yelled out in pain.

“jun, help!” she called out, but he was probably too far to hear. everytime she tried to move, a new thorn pricked her in a new place. she was basically stuck in her favorite flower bush. to most people, it would have been great to be surrounded by their favorite flower, but in that moment, y/n wished to be anywhere else.

“y/n? where are you?” junhui’s voice rang. he must have turned around after he didn’t hear y/n chasing him anymore.

“jun!” she yelled, “i’m in the bush! help!” she peaked her head up as much as she could, and she saw jun in the distance. he was looking around frantically until he finally caught sight of the bush. he ran over to her as fast as he could.

“oh my gosh, y/n,” he said, “how did this happen? are you alright?”

“i tripped over my shoelace, and fell on a bed of roses,” y/n chuckled, “it hurts to move.”

“here,” jun said, putting his hands on her sides, “i’ll help you up.” he began to lift her out of the bush. thorns latched onto her and were stuck in her skin, but most of them were still on the bush.

“oh, y/n,” jun pouted, “you have maybe 20 thorn pricks. i am so sorry we shouldn’t have played this game out here.”

“jun, it’s okay,” y/n consoled him, “i had fun. i always have fun with you.” each spot burned in pain. she looked down at the arms and upper legs and saw many bloody cuts. she reached her hand up to her face, grazing her cheek. she winced in pain, feeling more cuts. tears rushed into her eyes.

junhui grabbed her hand. “don’t touch your face,” he said, “there are more cuts on it.” his dark brown eyes were full of concern and empathy. he wiped y/n’s tears before they got into and of the cuts. “i can fix them for you. make them heal faster.” jun took y/n by the hand once again and began to walk her deeper into the forest.

every step y/n took, her left ankle felt sore. she groaned in pain following behind jun. he took around and took notice of this, stopping in his tracks. “here,” he said, “put your arms around my neck.”

y/n nodded, doing as he said. she put her arms around him, and felt him reach under her legs and lift her up. he began to carry her bridal-style into the forest. “you feeling okay, m’lady?”

y/n smiled. “besides from all these pricks, yes,” she said to her charming friend carrying her, “this feels quite nice.”

“special treatment for a special girl,” jun said. he always had such a way with words, and he was the most caring friend y/n had, the only one to be correct.

“where are we going?” y/n asked. this is the farthest they have travelled in a while, and she doesn’t know what down here would help with her cuts.

“you’ll see,” jun said, “i’ve been meaning to show you this little spot anyways. now we have a perfect reason to go.”

that just made y/n too curious. what could it possibly be?

“and we are here!” jun exclaimed.

y/n looked ahead of them and her jaw dropped. in front of them was a beautiful pond. it was surrounded by vines and trees. the water was so clear. it almost looked blue. it was like an oasis.

“my little- wait,” jun said, “our little paradise.” he smiled at y/n. he carried her over to one of the rocks by the pond and sat her down on it.

“junhui, this place is beautiful!” she said, taking in the scenery.

“isn’t it?” jun said giving y/n a smile. “sit tight and i’ll clean the cuts for you. this is the cleanest water you can find.”

y/n relaxed on the rock as she watched jun at work. he walked over to a bush full of coral bells. they were called such for their bell-like shape. he took one of the flowers off and dipped it into the pond, collecting water in it. he brought the water-filled flower back to y/n, kneeling down in front of her.

jun took two fingers into the flower and rubbed the water over the cuts, wiping away all the blood. the water made the cuts feel painless, seemingly healing them. it made y/n feel at ease.

“you wanna know something?” jun said to y/n, his eyes looking all over her face, “no matter how much your face gets cut up, you’ll still be the prettiest girl in the world.”

y/n blushed. he always knew how to compliment her. he had the nicest and sweetest things to say no matter what.

“you’re a liar,” y/n chuckled as jun finished cleaning all her face-cuts.

“i never lie, m’lady,” jun said, dipping his fingers into the water again. “can i see your arms now?”

y/n nodded, showing her arms to jun, and he began to clean. he took care of them pretty quick, then moved to her legs. just a few minutes later, she was all taken care of. none of them burned anymore. y/n felt no pain.

“there you go,” jun said, “all better.”

y/n smiled at her friend. “jun, sometimes i swear you’re some kind of forest god or something.

jun shrugged and laughed. “something like that,” he said. his face suddenly changed, like he had remembered something. “i almost forgot!” he said as he walked off.

y/n cocked her head to the side. ‘what did he forget? i’m feeling all fine now,’ y/n wondered to herself.

jun was at another flower bush. this time it was another rose bush. he picked one of the roses off, taking the thorns off the stem one by one. he walked back over to y/n. he pushed her hair back behind her ear, and placed the rose there.

“finishing touch,” jun smiled.

y/n smiled. roses had always been her favorite, and jun remembered it. “kinda ironic, don’t you think?” she joked, which made jun chuckle.

“i couldn’t help it,” jun said, “they’re your favorite, and they suit you so well. everytime i see a rose, i think of you. no rose can live up to your beauty.”

y/n smiled wide. she wrapped her arms around the boy. “thank you, junhui, for everything,” she said.

he hugged her back. “of course, m’lady. anything for you, forever and always.”

—

that day just made y/n love roses even more, even though they tore her skin up. after looking at them for a few more seconds, she decided to start typing.

“Roses, often hailed as the "Queen of Flowers," hold a special place in human culture and history. Their beauty, fragrance, and variety have made them a symbol of love, passi-”

a sudden noise behind her caused her to pause typing. she looked behind her, but didn’t see anything. ‘must’ve been a squirrel or bird,’ she said to herself and went back to typing.

“-passion, and admiration across different civil-”

the noise was closer now, and sounded bigger than any squirrel or bird. it sounded like footsteps. the footsteps were then accompanied by a voice.

“well, hello there.”

[velvetvexations]

Nursed With Kerosene Chapter One Willow World

Here it is! The first part of my serial novel, Nursed With Kerosene. This is the result of so much hard work. It's a story I've been wanting to tell for awhile, with a core cast of characters I first created as a child and many more I've created over the last few years. It's 79 pages long but it would mean the world to me if you read it and enjoy it. I really can't tell you how much this work means to me.

To give a brief description, Nursed With Kerosene is about praxis, love, rage, friendship, compassion, humanity, horror, lesbians, capitalism, psychosis, faith, therapy, music, understanding, swords, parenting, ninja, and a lot of other things.

To give a somewhat less brief description, Nursed With Kerosene is influenced a lot by the structure of TV shows like Angel and The Librarians, featuring a team of supernatural problem-solvers dealing with things no one else can. There is also more than a dash of anime in there, because I'm a shameless weeb. My ideal medium would be a series of Newground animations in 2006.

Nursed With Kerosene is part of my setting Memoirs to Prove the Existence of the Devil. The only other released MtPtEotD story is my previously published short story Six Underground, but it actually takes place long after NWK. Having said that, like a Soulsborne, a large part of NWK is going to be slowly unraveling things. You're not intended to understand everything. Names and events and concepts get mentioned, and you don't get it, and that's the intended experience. Hopefully you feel like you want to learn more.

Memoirs to Prove the Existence of the Devil is an adaption of the Cthulhu Mythos, as well as several stories in it's orbit not nearly as remembered as the works of Lovecraft, such as Algernon Blackwood's work. I really mine the shit out of the public domain, ngl. The journey I've taken through obscure late 19th and early 20th century literature is worthy of a non-fiction book all of it's own, and I may write that someday as well.

Some content warnings:

gore

transphobia

ableism

sexual harassment

misogyny

anti-masculinity

feds

Englishmen

characters who are honestly pretty terrible people but I demand, selfishly, that you like them anyway

I hope you like it. <3

[lol-jackles]

Hello,

It’s nice to see you more active on here at the moment.

I was thinking about how you tend to say that the bi-bros who lean towards Sam are more in line with the GA.

But, I watch lots of reactors watch SPN for the first time, and they often lean towards Dean (I’d say 3/5), and I’ve heard a similar ratio say that they think Jensen is a noticeably better actor than Jared.

So, my questions are, are they letting fan expectations colour their reactions (hellers and Dean girls are very fast to pounce on new reactors), are they already Destiel curious from seeing edits in tumblr (I know of at least one who fits this), or do they acquaint “they make me feel emotional therefore they are the best actor”?

For me personally, on my first watch, Dean killed me with his love for family and Sammy and I empathized more with him usually, at least until Season 4/5 where he started pissing me off regularly. But, when I rewatch, I love episodes like Mystery Spot and Born Under a Bad Sign, or Souless Sam episodes because Jared is just so good when he gets something interesting to do. I find the Dean crying stuff less compelling on rewatches because it’s not as interesting to me (with a few expectations) after the first and second viewing. And acting at mirrors scenes gets old for me in particular very quickly.

In short, I think both are good, with different strengths, but I wonder why so many new viewers that I come across see Jensen as being stronger and Dean as being better. Do the just fail to see past the narrative bias? Or they just like Sean because he’s more fun?

Anyway, I appreciate any thoughts you want to share on this. And I’m also wondering if there is stats anywhere in GA favoring Sam?

First, because Sam girls commit “geek social fallacies” by also liking Dean because they love that Dean revolves around their Sammy. But Dean/Jensen stans don’t return the favor because they hate that Dean revolves around his Sammy so they hate on Sammy even though under their breath they’ve said if Jensen had been playing Sammy all along they wouldn’t change any of the writing.  That’s why there appears to be a Dean bias in the SPN fandom because Sam fans also likes Dean.  

It’s not a coincidence that Sam girls are the fandom’s official representative (all the meta fans on the show are Sam fans).   The show is mostly Sam-centric, if the bitter Sam girls won’t believe me then believe Jensen’s interviews when he said that SPN is Sam-centric and called season 10 a "rare Dean-centric storyline". (X)

Second, Dean is supposed to be a scene stealer, that's what support-protagonist do.  Often our favorite characters are not the protagonist but these scene stealers characters, they are usually cool or very funny. But it becomes a problem when producers try to capitalize on the character’s popularity, like creating a spin-off.   Like spices, which can not take the place of the main course, scene stealers often fail as leads because their “special-ness” evaporates when they have to carry the show. It's why WB canceled Supernatural when Jared told them he was leaving, because they knew a Dean-led Supernatural wouldn't work.

So while I'm watching an episode, I am more drawn to Dean because he’s more fun or interesting to watch. However the next day I remember the episode through Sam’s actions and interactions. Some of my readers tell me that they were surprised that they seem to “forget” Dean when they recall specific storylines, I said that’s supposed to happen with the support-protagonist.  We don't remember much of what John Watson did in the classic Sherlock Holmes or what was Nick Carraway's deal in The Great Gatsby.

It's the protagonist who mobilizes the story and stands out in readers’ or audiences’ minds.  Dean needs interaction with Sam in order for the audience to even remember him because he's part of the protagonist’s story. It’s why I keep saying Supernatural is Sam’s story, it's his Hero’s Journey.   Dean is at his best when he’s focused on Sam (which is why season 10 sucked and season 5 was kind of weak).

Third, Jensen is a personality actor and people are generally more drawn to them. Jared is a character actor who is trapped in a leading man role. Jensen has been Jensen “Dean Winchester” Ackles for the majority of his TV and movie roles since 1998.  It’s why Jensen initially made a bigger splash with Dean in the early Supernatural seasons because he’s already been playing Dean for years since Days of Our Lives.  In 2005 when SPN premiered, Jensen had a 7 years head start playing Dean compared to Jared who was just starting to play Sam and had to create Sam from scratch.  By season 3, audiences began to notice Jared's versatile acting skills and he would soon be tasked with playing different characters because that's what character actors do.

[waynes-multiverse]

Aww, glad you enjoyed the first part of this! I tried to capture him as best as I could. I definitely had too much fun with all the twists 😂🤍

(A hot tub in the back, huh? Wayne, stop giving me ideas for ESC one-shots. 🥵🫠)

Yesssss, girl! Please write that!!! 🥵🔥🫠

Ooh yep! You really picked up on aspects of Russell's personality that I felt inherently when I was watching (studying) him, but hadn't consciously put into words. 👌🏽

He's for sure a little enigma 😏 (and a little shit lol) I found it interesting when I read the books that he was described as reclusive, and even though he comes off as charming and quirky in the show, I still get the feeling he's hiding the biggest stuff underneath the surface... I really wanted to showcase that his behavior and words don't always match his feelings and thoughts 👀

It's also so interesting (and crazy) how little Russ and Colter know about each other now as men. There's got to be shades of who they were when they were younger, but it's bittersweet in a sense. And now they're both trying to suss each other out like lone wolves that are kinda sorta friends. 😂

Yesss!!! That's always something I wanted the show to address, so I had to weave it in there! 😂 And considering they grew up pretty isolated and only had each other, it made sense to me they would've had a pretty close relationship as children (kinda like Sam and Dean if they'd ever been ripped apart for 20+ years 🥲)

But naturally, they wouldn't trust one another fully after all this time. I had a lot of fun writing their suspicion mixed in with brotherly banter 🤓

Okay, this whole thing with the reader is fascinating. Because why does he have to go through all this trouble to find her if they've been a thing for 10...12...14...20-something years?! (Love how the number in Russell's "memory" just kept getting longer. 🤣🤣)

Russell giving vague estimates of numbers actually became a running gag lol I used it first in the prequel before sprinkling it in here too 😂😂

Not the "we were on a break" gif 🤣🤣 (But the topic of how broken up they really were comes up in the next part lmao)

I'm full of questions, but I know you have a brilliant master plan for all of this. I've noticed this about the most recent stories you've created, but you're so very good at writing these law enforcement/military men paired with heroines that share their world, almost the "same foxhole" type of deal. Except for that his heroine partners usually outrank him. 😏

Haha thanks!! I honestly think I get hung up too much on details and then it escalates into a monstrosity 😂

And you already now I love all things SVU, crime etc. A year ago, I then got super into spy/CIA novels and media (Homeland, The Americans etc.), so I've been dreaming to write something like this for ages and jumped on the chance with Russell's background 🤓

Lol yes they always outrank him, don't they? I might go with the "tough love" approach a little too much, but I always feel like the Beaus, Deans, Soldier Boys, and Russells of this world need that 😂🫶

Also something about a little submission in a strong guy is a turn-on... 🫠

I tend to go the opposite route, partly because I'm interested in the dynamic between these kinds of men and a "civilian," but also because I don't think I'd be able to do the "same foxhole" trope justice. So that's something I really admire about you as a writer. 💜

Oh, I know! It's actually why I love your stories so much because you go the opposite route of me and I get a different experience. I usually struggle more with the "civilian" characters 😂 For fluffier fics, I go more civilian as well, but I clearly had an agenda for this one lmao

The push and pull banter between Colter and Russ in this chapter was also so fun to read lol. I could literally quote every moment because it was all so well-written and priceless. And it just kept building up the mystery of the reader and why Russell is doing all of this, right up until that awesome cliffhanger!!

Aww, thanks! That means a lot 🥰 I had so much fun writing those two. At some points, they even gave me Sam & Dean vibes 🥲❤️

Thanks so much for that sweet comment, Alex!!! 🤍

Btw, I'm so excited to read the last parts of ATW and the ESC one shots!! I so wanted to read them before the new year, thinking a week-long stay with baby's grandparents would get me some Mommy time, but... family. My husband actually sent me this after we left and I still feel it deeply 😂👇

The Exit Strategy – Part 1

Summary: Russell is ready to hang it all up and retire, open up a brewery, and enjoy the rest of his civilian life. However, there's one important thing missing before he can take the big plunge. Luckily, he knows just the right person to help him find it.

Pairing: Russell Shaw x Female!Reader

Warnings: +18, language, mystery, a tinge of angst, humor & brotherly banter, one tiny surprise 🤓

Word Count: 5.8k

A/N: Happy holidays, guys! Enjoy 🎄❤️

Main Masterlist || Series Masterlist || Tag List

Part 1: This Is Not a Pipe

The heavy truck door slammed shut behind him as Russell slid into the passenger seat with an exhaustive sigh. Colter’s big pickup was parked right next to his beautiful Chevelle in that same old motel parking lot in Virginia.

Russell hadn’t moved – yet. Well, sort of. He’d been away on assignment in some frosty region for a couple of weeks. He wasn’t allowed to say where exactly he’d been, and he knew better than to put it into writing, so let’s just agree he was at the North Pole looking for Santa Claus.

He could’ve ended up anywhere he wanted once he touched ground in the States again, but a very appreciated phone call from a former colleague made the decision for him. Besides, Russell knew this particular motel well. The coffee was more than decent and got the job done, the owner and employees were nice, comforting, and, most of all, trustworthy, and there were always fresh towels.

“Extra fluffy for you, Mr. Russell,” Rosa, the maid, would say every morning with the brightest smile.

Oh, and they had a hot tub in the back…

“Thanks for coming, man,” Russell extended his greeting without glancing at his younger brother once. He could feel Colter’s scrutinizing eyes on him, though, drilling for answers. Granted, his request had been rather unusual, so Russell understood where his younger brother’s ever-frozen furrowed brow stemmed from.

Providing answers didn’t come easy for the older Shaw, however. In fact, it had always been sort of a problem for him – even in the past. Especially in the past. Russell never lied, but he did omit things. Important things. On purpose.

“Yeah, uh, sure,” Colter replied with a polite smile as he started the car and rolled out of the lot.

Ah, yes, politeness…

That was what they were at, although it was progressively improving. It was only the third time the brothers were seeing each other since they had reconnected. And while the last two encounters had given the Shaws some well-needed time to talk things out and build trust, Colter was still naturally wary of his estranged sibling. As was Russell.

“So, what’s this about? You were pretty vague on the phone. You in trouble?”

That finally caught Russell’s full attention. He quickly shook his head, causing his hair to fall into his face. “What? No! No… No trouble,” he swiftly assuaged his brother with a dismissive hand gesture and a lighthearted chuckle. “Just need your help tracking down an old friend of mine, is all.”

Colter quirked an eyebrow at that. “Another Army buddy of yours?”

“Uh, something like that, yeah,” Russell replied rather mysteriously and didn’t even try to conceal the fact that he was hiding something more behind his ambiguous answer. But Colter only intensified his stare at him and wouldn’t let go that easily. Russell knew that. After all, they were related.

Persistence was a Shaw family trait. Another survival skill, if you will.

But this time, Russell wasn’t hiding a big government secret (or maybe he was). No lives depended on this particular mission (or so he thought). He wasn’t protecting a client, a company, or even his dubious employer (but someone else). He wasn’t choked by an NDA or about to save someone in grave danger (as far as he knew).

No, if anything, it was the fact that Russell didn’t know how much he could or should share with his brother. They were related, yes. But, technically, they hadn’t seen each other in decades, so they weren’t just considered merely estranged but strangers. Russell had always been aware of that fact, and Colter was beginning to catch on.

Especially during this mission.

See, once upon a time, the two hadn’t been just brothers. After moving to the cabin, societal contacts became scarce for the siblings. All they had was them. They were friends. Best friends. Always competitive, but friends nonetheless.

How much did they really know about each other now, though? How much of the old was still there?

“So, who are we looking for? What’s the guy’s name?” Colter asked, suddenly eager as he jumped into gear. He had always been restless, even as a kid, which fondly reminded Russell of their childhood.

But how much was he still the Russell that Colter once knew?

Well, Russell, on the other hand, remained calm and ruffled a casual hand through his beard. “Well, she’s, uh–”

Eyebrow cocked, Colter snapped his head to the passenger seat where his brother started to squirm. “Oh… Oh, so it’s a she,” he emphasized with a small grin. “Now I think I get it.”

There it is. I knew it, Russell thought with an internal sigh. In order for this mission to work, he knew he had to reveal some things. Private things. Things about himself and his life. Going in, Russell knew he couldn’t ask Colter for help without giving him something.

Their father had loved tests (and so did you – but that’s another story…). Russell always thought it had been the professor in him. So, Russell saw this as a test as well.

Could he trust Colter? And more pressingly, considering some long held accusations of murder, did Colter trust him?

A clear of Russell’s throat cut right through Colter’s chuckle. And then, the eldest tried his best to give no reaction at all. “Yes, she’s a… woman, but hold your horses. It’s not what you think, okay?” Colter lifted his eyebrow once more, causing Russell to heave another exhaustive sigh. “Fine, alright? It’s exactly what you think.”

Well, close enough, Russell thought. He knew Colter couldn’t even possibly imagine the reality in his wildest dreams.

Usually, Russell was an expert in avoiding uncomfortable questions. He was a pro at ditching answers and keeping secrets, even under torture and duress. However, there was just something entirely unique about dodging questions posed by little brothers.

And Russell saw it as a perfect bonding opportunity. He wanted to fill the chasm between them that their father’s death had caused – once and for all. But he couldn’t lie and say he wasn’t walking around on eggshells most of the time – something that reminded him of you again.

Learning from past mistakes, Russell wanted Colter to experience the fun side of him. The one that brewed his own beer, cared too much about his car, and had weird tastes in food. He chose to leave out the rest – the dark stuff and the very best stuff, too.

After all, Russell was good at omitting things.

Colter chuckled triumphantly. “Does this mean you’re finally giving up on Reenie?”

Amused, Russell let out a snort. “Ha! You wish… First things first, alright? Let’s just see how this thing pans out. It’s kind of a long shot. You know that exit plan I told you about?”

“Yeah, you wanna open your own brewery, right?”

“Yeah, well, let’s just say in an ideal world this, uh, woman would be part of that exit,” Russell said and sounded purposely casual as if he didn’t care the mission was successful or not in the end, omitting yet another thing – he did care.

He cared a fucking lot.

“Really? Okay.” Colter scratched his jaw and gave his words some thought. Then he offered a small, yet kind, smile. Honestly, Russell didn’t know what he had expected. “But, you know, if you want me to find the future Mrs. Shaw, I’m gonna need more information to go on. A name, last address, or a-, uh, a picture, maybe?”

“Well, name’s not gonna help you much in this case.” Your first name might’ve been shareable intel, but your last name was of the highest classification. “Her last address that I know of was in Berlin. And while I do have one photo of her, it’s not meant for your eyes, brother,” Russell said with a firmly territorial look that still carried a mischievous twinkle, revealing the exact nature of the photograph to be indeed inappropriate.

Russell had one naughty photo, yes. But he had a whole giant box of others, too.

Colter’s eyebrows met above his nose as he licked his lips. Customarily, people gave him more details when they needed him to find someone. But then again, those people usually weren’t his brother. “Do you know anything about this woman? How long have you two dated?”

“Uhm… not that long,” Russell supplied with a clear of his throat before mumbling the rest of his answer, hoping his beard would swallow most of his words. “Ten years. Give or take…”

What is time anyway if nothing but a concept, right?

Colter blinked at him and almost steered the vehicle off-road before gripping the wheel a little tighter. “I’m sorry… Did you just say ten years?”

“Well, might be more like twelve,” he admitted finally. “Well, anyways, saw her last three years ago.”

“Wow, okay, uhm…” Colter became quiet for a moment, speechless probably, the tiny bits of information running on a loop through his mind. He figured his brother still had lived a life while they hadn’t been speaking. Of course he had. He just never thought about what that life might have entailed, aside from classified military operations. “So, you’ve dated a woman for twelve years…”

“Fourteen.”

“…haven’t seen her in three, and know basically nothing about her?”

Russell snorted a laugh. “Yeah, I know. Ridiculous… Not even sure the name she did give me was her real one,” he said. It was a joke. He did know the name. He knew everything there was to know about you. So, maybe he did lie – sometimes. “But it’s the job, you know? It’s-, uh, it’s complicated.”

That part was true. Truer than he could ever possibly describe in words.

“I guess so…” Colter sighed, and Russell could hear the growing frustration. “So, she does what you do?”

Russell nodded. “In a way, yeah…” And Colter knew what that answer meant – he couldn’t say more. Again. “But don’t worry. We won’t have to turn over every stone on the face of this planet. I have a general idea of where she lives these days,” Russell provided. “One of my, uh, associates was working a job with her not that long ago. That’s how I found out she’s back in the States.”

Colter nodded in acceptance, knowing it was no use to try and prod more answers out of his brother. “Alright. Guess that’s something. So, where are we headed to?”

Russell then flashed him a grin with newfound determination sparkling in his green eyes. “Falls Church.”

The short drive had remained quiet for the most part. Colter refrained from asking more questions, knowing he wouldn’t be able to get straight answers out of his older brother in one form or the other. To accentuate Colter’s assumption of receiving non-answers, Russell mostly stared out the window with an intensity that had Colter believe his brother was counting trees when, in fact, Russell was pondering what he would, could, or should tell Colter.

Of course, Colter could also always ask more questions about their elusive father, but he didn’t do that either. Sure, one could say he was curious. More than that even.

What did Russell really know about his death? Their mother? Their family? Their work?

Another time, he kept telling himself throughout whenever he stole glances at his long-lost sibling. It was too soon. What was the point when Russell was so clearly reluctant to share anything at all?

Thus, there was nothing left but silence among peaceful woods and dense foliage till Colter pulled his truck over curbside in the idyllic town center of Falls Church.

Patiently, he waited a moment for Russell to open the floor and tell them their next logical steps. He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel, blew raspberries, clicked his tongue, and waited and waited and waited…

Nothing.

If Colter didn’t know any better, he would’ve thought someone carved a lifeless wax statue out of his brother and planted it on his passenger seat. Russell’s entire body stood motionless, only a set of green eyes flickered alive every once in a while and swayed out the windshield in search of something – or someone.

“So, what’s the plan here?” Colter asked with a clear of his throat. “You just wanna stay here and wait till she accidentally runs across the street?” It was meant as a joke, but to Colter’s dismay, Russell remained dead serious.

“That’s exactly what we’re doing,” the older Shaw confirmed and squinted his eyes at the busy street. Again, he had omitted a few things. In his mind, Colter didn’t need to know why Russell knew to be in front of the post office at exactly 15:03 (UTC–4) on a Tuesday.

Colter snorted a laugh. “What? C’mon, that can’t be the plan… Do you know how many people live in Falls Church? Or in the general Washington metropolitan area? We could be here for days. Weeks even…” The younger Shaw then switched fully into work mode, grabbing his phone from the Bluetooth car mount. “We’re never gonna find her like this. You got a phone number, maybe?” But before Russell could answer, Colter replied himself, shaking his head at his own silliness. “What am I even asking? Of course you don’t.”

Russell only smirked at that. Restless, he thought again.

“What about an old one? Maybe even that would help. I could call Bobby, Reenie… You got anything? Nothing?” But the younger Shaw’s questions apparently stumbled upon deaf ears. “Russell? Russ? Are you even listening to me? I’m trying to help you here. You could at least–”

“Found her!”

Russell almost jumped out of the car as his voice rang with sheer excitement. His heart was beating a mile a minute when his emerald eyes landed on the target. It felt like the very first time all over again.

Granted, the first meeting didn’t go so smoothly – there had definitely been some bumps (all on his part). Then again, he expected this next meeting to go a little roughly too (again, all on him).

“Wait, what?!”

Russell downright beamed. “Told you this would work.”

Colter only scoffed under his breath, the familiar competitiveness crawling back to the surface. “Yeah, well, beginner’s luck, okay?”

One boot had nearly touched asphalt before Russell remembered this wasn’t a situation that required him to storm in guns a-blazing – not even covert. Gentle hands, he reminded himself and swiftly closed the car door again, falling back into his seat. His lungs deflated.

Colter, on the other hand, was more confused than ever. “What-, uh, what are you doing?” Half-amused, his brow furrowed a bit more. “If you’ve found her, go talk to her. Where is she? Who is it?”

Curiosity could only be contained for so long. Colter wanted to know who had been a part of his brother’s life for almost as long as he had. He felt this was a key piece of information that would cause the first domino to fall. And then, revelation after revelation about Russell’s past would unravel.

Basically, Colter was waiting for the big epiphany. No pressure.

Russell vehemently shook his head. “Can’t. At least not like this. I need more intel first. You need to find out her name, and then we need your guy Bobby to get onto this.”

And yet again, guess what? Yes, Russell was, indeed, omitting things.

“Me? Why me?” Colter blinked at him. Surprise, surprise…

“‘Cause, obviously, she’d recognize me,” Russell pointed out. Again, omission. Like he had explained earlier, it was a real problem…

Colter exhaled a deep sigh. “Okay, and I’m guessing you’re still not gonna tell me why we’re doing all of this, right?”

“Nope.”

“Yup, thought so.” Still not convinced, Colter narrowed his eyes at his clearly paranoid brother. Maybe paranoia ran in the family. Not to point fingers – he recognized it in himself, too. “Do we really need to go through all that trouble? I mean, you’ve known that woman for, what, fourteen years, you said? Isn’t that a little extreme… even for you?”

Fifteen, Russell corrected in his mind. Close to sixteen. Nineteen max.

“Just trust me, okay? It’s necessary,” Russell reassured, knowing those words bore some weight. Hurriedly (he was getting antsy – this was a time-sensitive issue), he pointed a finger out the window to the sidewalk across the street. “You see that woman walking into the post office? That’s her.”

“What, the brunette in the flowery dress with the golden cross necklace? That’s her?”

“Yup.”

“Wow, okay…” Surprised didn’t come close to explain how Colter felt. He had expected… different. His brow almost met his hairline, but he still tried his best to conceal his wonder – to no avail.

Suspiciously, Russell leaned back in his seat and assessed his brother’s demeanor with a small glare. “What?”

“Nothing.” Colter threw his hands up in surrender, swallowing. “Just… She doesn’t really seem like your type.”

Amused, Russell stifled a chuckle. “And what exactly do you think is my type, little brother?”

“I don’t know…”

“What, you think some nice Christian girl is too good for me?” Russell deadpanned. Admittedly, he enjoyed bantering with his little brother. It reminded him of what he had missed out on for years. This was what he had wanted and longed for since he had left the family at eighteen.

Well, “left” wasn’t really the right word for it now, was it? It implied a voluntary act, and his leaving wasn’t so voluntary.

“That is exactly what I’m saying,” Colter countered, laughing. “It’s just, you know… dental hygienist in a motel hot tub springs to mind.”

“Okay, alright… You done?” Russell huffed, shaking his head. He refrained from showing his honest amusement. “You’re gonna follow her in or not?”

“Alright, I’ll go,” Colter finally agreed somewhat enthusiastically and jumped out of the car, swiftly following the woman inside. After all, he was curiouser and curiouser…

Russell kept his eyes trained on his younger brother until Colter vanished inside the post office. Now, it was out of his hands, only hoping his little brother wouldn’t blow it. Chances were high he would. Not that Russell didn’t have some faith.

He just had more faith in you.

Colter spotted you picking up mail from a PO box and decided on a plan of action in a matter of seconds. After all, he was quick thinking on his feet and the best at what he did. That’s why he was here. That’s why Russell had picked him for the job, right?

As you made your way back to the door, Colter eloquently intercepted you without disturbing the crowd. Another thing he had learned from his father.

He bumped straight into your shoulder and almost tackled you to the ground by the sheer force of his sneak attack. The mail in your hands scattered to the tiled floor like autumn leaves, and as Colter bent down to help you pick it up, he took a peek at your name on a postcard.

“Oh my God, would you look at that… I’m so sorry, Miss–,” the younger Shaw apologized clumsily, “Nora Laurier.” He uttered your name with a suave smile as he handed you back your pile of letters. The flirt in his eyes, however, he only added for Russell as revenge for Reenie. “Beautiful name.”

Your hands lingered on the letters between you for a moment as you took in his features and tall stature. It left you with a strange haunting of familiarity.

“Thank you,” you finally said with a hint of a smile as he let go of the mail. “Be more careful next time.”

“I will. Sorry again.” Colter chuckled with blushed cheeks and watched you leave. He waited till you had passed the row of windows before exiting himself.

He was a good actor, too.

Antsy, Russell almost bit his lip bloody as he stared the post office down till a migraine began to form. God, what he wouldn’t pay for some X-ray vision and super-hearing. He could be downright Superman with that – and the hero always got the girl.

His heart dithered anew with longing as you walked out – it took his breath away. You always did that, and you did it well. But then, you stopped short for a mere second, which wouldn’t have caused a civilian to raise a single brow. But Russell did.

“Shit…” he mumbled in the silence of the truck and lowered himself down to the dashboard. He watched you reach for your phone in your purse and call someone as you headed down the street.

Eventually, you stopped three houses east and finished your call in the shade of a tree next to a busy (and noisy) bus station. Russell caught your eyes drifting back to the doors of the post office, though, just as his little brother walked out and jogged towards the car.

“Shit, shit, shit!” Russell ducked even further down, hitting his head in several places. “What did that knucklehead do?”

The driver’s door opened as Colter casually slipped inside. “Got a name,” he announced victoriously. Part of his happiness emanated from gathering yet another puzzle piece of his mysterious brother – meeting you. “She goes by Nora Laurier now… And she seems nice. Way too nice for you, actually…” As he drifted off, his eyes searched for the elder one before finding him almost kissing the floor mat. “Russ, uh… What-, uh, what are you doing down there?”

“What the hell did you do?” Russell’s tone was both snappy and frustrated.

“Whoa, what d’you mean what did I do?” Colter waved off defensively. “I did what you told me to do!”

“She made you!”

“She did not make me,” Colter brushed off with a laugh, quite confident of his own skill set. They’d had the same teacher. He would know if you had suspected anything.

“Then why did she wait and look after you, huh?” Russell pointed out in annoyance.

Colter’s lips itched to break a smile. He couldn’t help it. It was the perfect opportunity to teach his flirt of a brother a well-needed lesson. “Well, maybe I caught her eye… piqued her interest, you know?”

Russell cocked a brow from below, his stare lethal. “Did you flirt with her?”

Colter hesitated for a moment. Mostly for dramatic effect. “I-, uh… You told me to get her name. ‘Sides, I told you Reenie was off limits.”

“Oh, so this is about revenge? Very mature.” Russell frowned. “She still there?”

“Where?” Colter stretched himself a bit as he looked out the windshield.

“Tree. Bus station.”

An amused smile formed on Colter’s lips as he spotted you. “Oh, yeah. I see her. I don’t think she suspects anything. She’s not even loo-… No, uh, wait… Yup.”

“What?” Russell’s brows drew together as he rose a little from his crouched position.

“Yeah, she’s definitely looking over here.”

“Well, stop looking down,” Russell hissed through gritted teeth. After a deep breath, he spoke in a calmer, more advising tone, “Pretend I’m not here.”

“Trying to, trust me… Should I wave at her? Smile?”

“Are you nuts?! Just look ahead. Pretend you’re getting a phone call.”

Colter did as he was told and held his phone to his ear. “She’s still looking,” he informed with a pressed smile, barely moving his mouth when he spoke.

“Okay, what’s she doing now?”

“There’s a-, uh, there’s a car coming and pulling over by the bus station. Dark gray Audi A6. Virginia Plates. Yankee-Papa-Charlie-5824,” Colter said as Russell hauled a pen from his pocket and began to jot down the plate numbers on his left palm.

“Copy that.”

He’d memorize them anyway, but one could never be too safe. He could get a concussion in the next hour or so (most likely because of you), and then what?

“Okay, she’s getting in,” Colter narrated. “Driver’s in his late-thirties. Male. Glasses. Medium height. Medium build… I think you could take him,” he added with a teasing grin.

“Shut up,” Russell retorted. “Are they gone now?”

“Pulling away from the curb and… Yep, they’re gone. Headed south down the road,” Colter affirmed.

“Alright.” Russell popped back into his seat with a sigh and some sore muscles. He had been sure he’d heard a few bones crack while he’d been cowering down there. He might be finally getting too old for these missions. But that was part of the reason why he was here in the first place – retirement was calling. And Russell wanted to fill the chair next to him on the porch.

“You good?” Colter checked and choked the small laugh that wanted to escape upon the ruffled sight of his older brother.

“Yeah, go ahead and follow them. Just keep a low profile,” Russell instructed. “On our way, you might wanna call your op analyst, too. See what he can find out.”

“Alright,” Colter agreed somewhat reluctantly but still tailed the sedan. “You sure this is a good idea?”

“What d’you mean?” Russell said mindlessly, keeping his eyes focused on the target vehicle.

“Us… stalking your ex-girlfriend?” Colter noted with a cocked brow. “And her potentially new boyfriend?”

Russell only laughed at that. “We’re good. Trust me.”

Admittedly, though, a small part of him wondered (and worried) if this was all real. Maybe Nora Laurier wasn’t your real name, but it might be your actual new one – one you’d adopted as a safety precaution after you’d left it all behind. Maybe you had finally done it and retired, found a perfectly normal guy, and settled down – just without him.

Or:

Maybe you were still in the game, after all.

Russell was hoping it was the latter. Otherwise, he could probably expect a hefty restraining order in his future, but he wasn’t about to tell Colter that. Not until he knew for sure.

The Audi parked in front of an organic grocery store a few blocks down. Colter chose a spot across the parking lot, keeping a reasonable distance with the perfect view. Russell watched as you and Unnamed Man #1 sauntered into the store, an arm slung tightly around your waist and a smile on your face.

While on the phone with Bobby, Colter could tell that the sight of you in another man’s arms stung. “Okay, uh, thanks, Bobby.”

“What’d he say?” Russell fired as soon as Colter had removed the phone even just an inch from his ear.

“Uh, well, there’s some bad news,” Colter revealed hesitantly and licked his lips, not knowing how he was supposed to break his brother’s heart. “Bobby ran the plate number through the DMV. It’s registered to an Aiden Laurier.”

“Laurier?” Undeniably, Russell’s heart flinched at the connection. “Maybe a brother. Cousin…”

Or a colleague, Russell’s mind stubbornly added.

Colter bit his lower lip hard before he spoke, “They’ve been married for two years. I’m sorry, Russ.”

A hand comfortingly patted Russell’s shoulder. A part of him wanted to scream heavenward, but something else inside was gnawing on him.

He clicked his tongue. “No… No.” Sure, one could argue that denial was always the first step of grief. “No. No way she married sweater-vest John Mulaney over there.”

“I’m pretty sure she did. Bobby sent me the marriage certificate,” Colter countered and showed him the screenshot on his phone.

Russell glanced at it for a short second, not even bothering to waste more time on fake news. He shook his head. He knew better.

“Nah. I’m not buying it. You need to go in there and tell me what you see.” He sealed his words with an encouraging pat on the shoulder.

Colter exhaled deeply. “Russ, I-, uh, I think you need to let this go, man. You’re starting to… Never mind.”

“No. Go ahead. Say it,” Russell prompted with some thunder in his voice. “I’m reminding you of Dad, don’t I?”

Colter only twitched his shoulders. “I mean, yeah. A little.”

Russell’s head bobbed in thought before he met his little brother’s eyes. “You really don’t see it?”

“See what?”

“The post office, the road crew over there, the-, the fake documents?”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“C’mon… Just think about everything Dad taught us, huh?”

Was Colter really not getting it? Russell found that quite hard to believe. He had known his little brother to be as sharp as a whip. While Russell didn’t always have the nicest things to say about their father, he could admit the old man had prepared them well for life. Well, one life at least. This one.

The nomad life, the odd jobs that required them to have a particular set of skills like Liam Neeson.

Colter shook his head. “I have no clue what you’re talking about, Russell.”

Russell let out a sigh and leaned back in his seat. “Alright, if you don’t see it, you don’t see it.” A smirk twitched in the corners of his lips. “It’s your funeral, brother…”

With narrowed eyes, Colter pursed his lips. “Alright, just tell me one thing, okay?”

“You know I can’t tell you anything,” Russell reiterated and brushed his beard.

“I know. I know… It’s not that kinda question,” the younger Shaw reassured.

“Go ahead,” Russell relented and curiously looked at his brother.

Within a second, Russell could think of a million questions Colter might want to ask him, but this hadn’t been one of them:

“In the past three years, how many times have you thought about her? And I don’t just mean ‘crossed your mind’ every couple of months. I mean ‘seriously thought’ about her?”

“Hmm.” Russell pondered for a moment before replying, “Every damn day.”

It wasn’t a lie, no omission of anything, and Colter could tell. You were the first thought that popped into Russell’s still groggy mind when he woke up and the last one every night that fluttered across his weary eyelids. Obviously, he didn’t give Colter the soppy answer, though.

“Fine. I’ll go,” Colter softened his stance. “You owe me,” he added with a pointed finger before setting foot outside the car.

“I do owe you. Anything you want, brother,” Russell agreed with a broad grin. “How about we start with a full case of my homebrew, huh?”

Colter danced gracefully through the aisles, spying through canned goods and boxes of cereal. He watched you carefully select fruit with your husband, move through the dairy talking about “organic” and “locally sourced” till you landed on a few choices of toothpaste and finally strolled to the cash register.

Everything seemed boringly normal and ordinary. You chatted with the cashier. They handed you a coupon, which you slipped into your purse. Your husband paid with his credit card (which carried the same name matching the DMV records), and both of you left the store with two paper bags in your arms.

Once through the sliding glass doors, you stopped and turned to your husband. “Darn, honey, I think we forgot the milk.”

“You want me to grab it?”

“No, I’ll do it.”

“Okay, I’ll wait by the car and load the rest of the groceries.”

Now, Colter found that odd. He had watched you spent at least five minutes in the dairy aisle. How could you forget something as basic as milk?

As you hushed inside, your husband sauntered back to the car, and Colter followed you back in. You passed right by the dairy and, with a few looks that resembled a scan of your surroundings, you slipped past the door that led to the restrooms.

Waiting a beat, Colter went in after you. But you were long gone – just not to the restroom. An ‘Employee Only’ door that led to a dumpster alley outside was just falling shut.

Granted, Colter had a bad feeling about this. It was the same feeling he always got shortly before walking into a trap. In his defense, though, you were not a seven-foot-tall, 300-pound kind of guy. He wasn’t about to be ambushed by Shaquille O’Neal, which is probably why Colter didn’t find it necessary to pull his gun.

In hindsight, he should have.

The narrow alley was quiet and empty, except for some trash littering the ground around the dumpsters. It was closed-off, too, wedged between buildings with no view to the parking lot or nearby streets.

And then, something hit him. Or better yet: You hit him. With an elbow to the face and a stiff, flat palm to his throat, Colter stumbled forward before you gave him the final blow and knocked him off balance, tackling him to the ground.

Pressing his cheek into the rough and unforgiving surface of the asphalt, you jumped on him and restrained his arms tightly behind his back. While he squirmed to get out of your hold, he didn’t use as much brutal force as you expected he would.

“Shit,” he muttered below you, his voice muffled by the gravel. A light chuckle escaped him. “Okay, you got me.”

“Sounds about right,” you agreed with a smirk and tightened your grip on his arm.

Then, Colter heard a gun click above him. Hoping to see his brother, he looked up – only to find your husband with a weapon in hand as he stared down the barrel.

“Ah, I think you broke my nose,” the younger Shaw mumbled with a groan.

“Good. You’ve been following me. Why?” you prompted sternly. “Who are you? Who are you working for? Jafari? Mueller?”

“Listen, I-I think you’ve got the wrong idea. I’m not who you think I am,” Colter argued with a strained voice. What the hell had Russell gotten him into? “This is just a big misunderstanding.”

“Uh-huh.” You could only roll your eyes at that. How many times had you heard that line before?

“Let’s hood him. Get him to the Market,” your partner suggested. “We’ll see if he talks then.”

“No, really,” Colter insisted, growing a bit more uneasy. He had no idea what the Market was, but it didn’t sound pleasant. “You know my brother.”

“Who’s your brother?” With your elbow, you put more pressure on his back.

“Ow, alright…” Colter groaned once more as the pain intensified. “Looks kinda like me. Think two decades younger. He was in the Army, so probably didn’t have long hair and a beard. Uh, kind… green eyes? No? Doesn’t ring a bell?”

Colter watched your brow furrow in his periphery as he squinted upwards. He could see the gears starting to turn in your head. You just needed one final push to put all the puzzle pieces together.

“If it helps, my name is Colter. Colter Sh–”

“Shaw,” you shot like a missile. Your jaw plummeted to the ground, your heart springing right out with it. Your grip on the man caught between your thighs loosened, hearing Colter’s sigh of relief before you heard his voice.

“Hiya, sweetheart.”

Your head darted up, the man beneath you long forgotten. You swallowed as your eyes landed on an all too familiar face – even when it was covered by a bunch of hair that had never been there before. The heart-crushing smile was still the same as if it had been ripped straight from an old photograph you had of him.

“Russell?!”

Part 2: This Is a Russell Mission

Quite the entrance! Writing Russell reminded me somewhat of Plastic Hearts Dean (minus the addiction problems unless you count lying) because of all the wild overthinking 😂

If you enjoyed this story, then I'll gladly keep working on its prequel. Was a bit nervous to post this since I filled in some family history gaps myself 😅 I also dove into the books a little and added some things that kinda fit their "show" personalities.

Please let me know what you think and if you'd be interested in a young soldier!Russell series 😉🤍

TAGS:

Forevers: @alwaystiredandconfused @xlynnbbyx @lyarr24 @deans-spinster-witch @blackcherrywhiskey

@deansbbyx @foxyjwls007 @ladysparkles78 @roseblue373 @zepskies

@agalliasi @yvonneeeee @hobby27 @iamsapphine @globetrotter28

@mxltifxnd0m @lacilou @feyresqueen @suckitands33 @onlyangel-444

@syrma-sensei @perpetualabsurdity @deans-baby-momma @yoobusgoobus @jessjad

@hunter-or-the-hunted @k-slla @just-levyy @mrsjenniferwinchester @illicithallways

@muhahaha303 @ultimatecin73 @nancymcl @leigh70 @brightlilith

@nesnejwritings @samslvrgirl @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @fromcaintodean @barewithme02

@thebiggerbear @star-yawnznn

@deansimpalababy

[ladyhoneydee]

Fic Recs - Expanding Hyrule Bingo!

If you're looking for some hot fresh recs that you may not have seen before, boy do I have the post for you!

For the last few days, I have been compiling answers for the @expanding-hyrule TBR Bingo Community Challenge! If this is the first time you're hearing of it, EH is a LoZ fandom project that intends to popularize a tag and create an archive for Original Legends, or LoZ fics, art, etc that create their own version of Hyrule, characters therein, and plot different from the canon games. The Bingo Challenge is a project to get people viewing and talking about more of these stories!

Of course, as a chronic overachiever when it comes to fandom, I got blackout on my bingo card. And because several of the works I counted aren't yet in the Expanding Hyrule Fic Archive, I felt this would be the perfect way to get the word out about even more cool works!

If it has a * asterisk, I had already read or been reading it prior to the announcement of the challenge. If two ** asterisks, I had already read or been reading it prior to discovering EH!

A1 - Recommended by a friend: Cycle of the Stars by @daeyumi

A2 - A genre I don't normally read: The Ritual of Lomei Labyrinth by @pocketseizure **

A3 - Caught up on a work: The Legend of Three by @fablesfables **

A4 - An incomplete project: Mark of a Hero by @amelias-zelda-calamity-quintet **

A5 - I made an Original Legends work: Too Old to Keep by @ladyhoneydee (me) **

B1 - Updated this year: Uneasy Lies the Chosen of Farore by @drsteggy **

B2 - Less than 5000 hits or 500 notes: Hero of the Dunes by @webhead3345 **

B3 - Picked because of the synopsis: Vessels by @ro-blaze **

B4 - A comic: Chained Truths by @mirensiart

B5 - Subscribed to an ongoing work: All That Hurts Us by @karama9 **

C1 - A familiar creator: A Link to the Stars by @abbyz-elda **

C2 - An Original Legends work not in the archives: The inconsistencies of fate by @stinkyguar

C3 - Show Us Your EH TBR: The Hunt by andrhars **, A Link to the Stars: Constellations *, Divine Gemstones by @divine-gemstones, all updates for ULtCoF, THotD, ALttS, AVftD, and CotS since Jan 2

C4 - By a mutual or someone I'd like to be a mutual: The Princess's Heart by @loz-untold-myths **

C5 - Multiple POVs: The Legend of Zelda: A Crossing of Stars by @ixtaek **

D1 - A new favorite: A Voice From the Desert by @avoicefromthedesert *

D2 - A reread: The Conviction to Save by @advocaado **

D3 - A fic: The Promise by @zeldaelmo ** (rated E)

D4 - A genre I love: In the Blood by @zeldaseyebrows ** (rated E)

D5 - Picked because of the title: Linkubus by RoughInTheDiamond * (rated M)

E1 - A compete project: Cherished by @sparklyhyperbole **

E2 - Last updated more than a year ago: Path of the Infinite by @shadow-djinni ** (rated M)

E3 - A new creator: Depth of Darkness by VeeLilu **

E4 - Less than 1000 hits or 100 notes: On My Honor by @pelicanpig **

E5 - Left a review in EH's Story Spotlights: The King's Lament by @transmascgerudo ** (rated E)

If you pick up any of these, I hope you enjoy! They all come with my blessing <3