#I love the concept of the pack but execution looks terrible

[foxtronaute]

Businesses and hobbies and those are all the new hobbies like... make an effort EA please, or at least don't sell your game with that title

[icravemusicx0x0]

rating music pls dont hate me #33 | BRAT - CHARLI XCX

CHARLI has always been an icon of the pop industry, the internet culture, and the gays. she's responsible for the making of HUGE HITS like I LOVE IT by ICONA POP, FANCY by IGGY AZALEA. she helped REVOLUTIONIZE a new LANDSCAPE for POP MUSIC, taking inspiration from BUBBLEGUM BASS and the PC MUSIC record label and making POP 2. as you can see, she is a BIG DEAL.

with the help of her long-time executive producer A.G COOK, CHARLI returns to the HYPERPOP concept i know and love in her newest album, BRAT. however, BRAT add a simple twist in this form of production—it's a 41-minute long CLUB RECORD. a GREEN PANTONE-coded back drop with with the text 'BRAT' in lowercase printed in the center that is slightly compressed is presented in the cover of the album. "i think the constant demand for access to women’s bodies and faces in our album artwork is MYSOGINISTIC and BORING [sic]," CHARLI tweeted out in response to people's criticism of the artwork's MINIMALISM. she's "not doing things to be NICE." CHARLI's confrontational actions is an introduction of what to expect.

now what is BRAT? BRAT is how CHARLI refer to a person who is "a bit MESSY who loves to PARTY and says DUMB THINGS," CHARLI explains. "she's HONEST, BLUNT, AND A LITTLE BIT VOLATILE. that's BRAT."CHARLI's BRAT SUMMER is a SUMMER holiday where you can do whatever you want and be, and you can assume what a BRAT SUMMER is whatever you like. "[BRAT SUMMER] can be LUXURY but it can also be TRASHY. just like a pack of CIGS and a BIC lighter and a strappy white TANK with NO BRA," the POPSTAR joked in a radio interview with NICK GRIMSHAW. "that's kind of all you need." it's like MEGAN THEE STALLION's HOT GIRL SUMMER, but you're a RAVE GIRL.

what i love about CHARLI's BRAT is how HONEST and RELATABLE she is in the ALBUM and how CONFRONTING she approach to it. CHARLI did confirm that there is no other DISS TRACK in the album but VON DUTCH, but the lyricism is BRUTATLLY HONEST and DIRECT, yet it feels PERSONAL and INFORMAL—CHARLI described it as "the way i would say it to a FRIEND in a TEXT MESSAGE". this way of CHATTING her feelings on the album helps me connect more into all the things she's talking about.

the production is top-tier, too. A.G COOK cooks just as hard as POP 2, now with a more UPBEAT and RAVY tune. CHARLI took part in CO-PRODUCING the track APPLE, she did AWESOME looking at the overall quality of the song (and her BOILER ROOM stage which you should check out). with the PERFECTLY-CRAFTED lyrics over a layer of AUTO-TUNE in some places, she cooked up a AOTY contender, no doubt the AOTY winner.

well, in conclusion, BRAT is now my top 1 album of the year, and my most favorite CHARLI album, succesding POP 2.

underrated gem(s): EVERYTHING IS ROMANTIC - crazy how unpopular this song is like HUHHHH, I MIGHT SAY SOMETHING STUPID - my top 1 sad song of all time in tie with CARAMELDASSEN BUT IT'S PLAYING IN A DIFFERENT ROOM (1 HOUR LOOP), SO I - RIP SOPHIA the best memorial song for the best artist in the HYPERPOP game,

tracks that i rec listening: all

worst track: I THINK ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME - it's a very meaningful song but it kind of run dry BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN ITS TERRIBLE THO.

overall score 9.9/10 - this is all opinion so pls no hate

[pleas3pretendimnothere]

I'm going to make a little diary on here from now on! I love talking about fiction, and I tend to dislike a lot of "popular" fiction, so that leads me to reading whatever book I pick up that has an interesting summary! However, that means whenever I read a book, I don't know anyone else who's read it! I don't have any (ANY) friends that enjoy reading as much as I do, so I'm just going to put my thoughts down on here!

I started reading more vigorously last year, because last year was the first I wasn't working (I was an RN in the US, but I moved to Tokyo, where I can't work without a Japanese license). By then, I'd collected over 90 books on my bookshelf that I hadn't read, so when the New Year started, I decided it was time to tackle them! This year, I want to discuss what I read with...anyone!!! (and i don't have a twitter...) So keep reading!!

Proxy

By Alex London - Because I've been collecting so many books for so long, I tend to have a lot of YA fiction that's sat on my shelf for years and years and years going unread. This is one of those books! I fully went into this one expecting it to be another terribly developed YA novel. That can be very hit or miss--some YA novels are so bad, they become impossible to put down. It's like looking at a car crash!

Proxy was bad bad, and that's because it was disappointing. The book starts with a lot of positive surprises. It's a cyberpunk retelling of The Whipping Boy, where the hyper-wealthy are able to employ vulnerable, poor "proxies" to inherit their debts and legal punishments in exchange for an education. For cyberpunk, this is a match made in heaven. It made so much sense, I asked myself, "How has this not been done before?" And then, you quickly learn that the main character is LGBT! What a refreshing surprise from a 2013 sci-fi YA novel! All of this was setting up the book to be fresh, fun, and new. Unfortunately, it was none of those things.

The first half of the book is quite strong, setting up interesting characters with compelling dilemmas in a frightening, nonsensical world. The second half falls into the YA pitfall. As action ramps up, pacing ramps down. Things that appeared to make sense no longer do. And of course, now there is a rebel faction, and only our MC can lead them. And, wonderfully, the gay love story--spoilers here--doesn't end well! What a shocker!

Not worth anyone's time, building up an exciting novel only to crash and burn so hard. Read Snow Crash instead, and please SKIP IT!

Rot and Ruin

By Jonathan Maberry - Here is another book that's been with me for ages and ages. This one is a 2010 zombie YA novel. I have so much to say about this book, and unfortunately, it's quite like Proxy. A lot of good ideas, but poor execution.

This book has been recognized very positively, and it's clear why. The book is all about humanity. Introducing a concept like a "closure specialist"--a bounty hunter who specifically finds and puts to rest loved ones lost to the zombie pandemic--was a spectacular idea. It makes sense for any zombie world, and yet, I've never read about it! However, the extent to which this concept is explored doesn't always read well. The narrative wants you to sympathize with zombies, seeing them less as hungry packs of senseless wolves, but instead as hordes of human victims who were never properly put to rest. That's hard to understand. I mean, they want my brains! Maybe they were people once, but I could never see them as still human! Maybe that's the fault of Maberry's, or the concept of zombies itself. So while I LOVED the "closure specialist" angle, the book's goal of creating empathy for zombies falls quite flat.

My central issue was the book's pacing. For a zombie novel, it's incredibly slow from beginning to end. Even when exciting things are happening, it felt like a slog, perhaps due to our MC's frequent lack of agency. Often, characters are telling our MC pages and pages of more interesting things that happened far in their past--believe me, this apocalyptic world is cool, we'll tell you about it! The MC's brother is constantly showing the reader what a more compelling MC he would have been! What a shame! Instead, we are stuck with a rather annoying, childish young MC, whose contribution to the story, by the conclusion, feels minute.

So many good ideas, and in fact, one of the most powerful, emotional Epilogues I've read in a long time, but overall quite boring. Took me 3 weeks to read! If you love zombie fiction, this is worth a RENT IT . Otherwise, SKIP IT!

Her Fearful Symmetry

By Audrey Niffenegger - Here is a 2009 novel about a pair of young American twins who inherit their estranged aunt's London flat. Little do they realize, the flat is being haunted... That is the summary that attracted me to Her Fearful Symmetry. I see often the "Horror" genre tacked on to this one. The only horror is the book's lackluster story.

This is a beautifully written piece that left me asking, "Why?" Why was this book written? Who was it written for? Two eccentric 21-year-old sisters, who are virtually connected at the hip and share a mutual lack of ambition, move into a mysterious flat, where they both fall into the arms or the poor, emotionally damaged male neighbors who are twice their age. One man is married and struggling with severe OCD--oh, have pity on him! The other was romantically involved with the aunt. What an interesting choice!

There is a real charm somewhere in here. It's clear that Niffenegger fell in love with London's Highgate Cemetery--she even went on to give volunteer tours of the cemetery following her work on this novel, which is so incredibly sweet! Love for the cemetery reads clearly all throughout and is undoubtedly the strength of the novel, but unfortunately, it's made background to a story that left me confused and sometimes uncomfortable (I am so tired of girls in their 20s dating men in the 40s). Even worse, it's predictable in all the wrong ways. I was never surprised by the story, impressed by the concepts, or invested in a character. I just kept asking, "Why?"

And when the plot twist hit? Ugh! Silly, and overcomplicated. Trying to relay it to my husband just made him laugh. SKIP IT!

The Slanted Worlds

By Catherine Fisher - This is the second novel in Fisher's 2012-2016 Obsidian Mirror series. Thankfully, I didn't read ALL bad books this month. While this book, much like its predecessor, isn't incredibly new or special, it's executed well enough to keep me invested.

The writing isn't special, but it's approachable to readers of all ages, and luckily, the story and characters are enough to keep you glued to the page. If you're able to suspend your disbelief and consume a book about time-travel, this is great addition to the scif-fi genre! There are elements to the story that are confusing, as time-travel is doomed to be, but that is rescued by the book's colorful cast of characters. Each contender is technically working with everyone else, and yet, they all have their own conflicting motive surrounding the series' McGuffin. It's executed well enough that I am constantly wondering who is going to snap first and betray the group. That works magic for the pacing! Every character has secrets waiting to be discovered by both the characters and the reader!

There is an emotional aspect missing from this book, but the rest of it is so strange and magical and weird, that I couldn't help but zip through this one. Wonderfully paced, RENT IT!

Tada! And that was January! Thank you if you read this, and I'll be back at the end of February!

[midnightmuffingay]

Rating the pets of EAH based on what is on the EAH wiki and my limited knowledge:

Adelita - Rosabella's butterfly. I have never heard of this. Also apparently Adelita translates to 'noble'?? 3/10 I don't think it suits her and also how do you keep a butterfly as a pet.

Barber - Poppy's squirrel monkey. I guess squirrel monkeys are cute and I can see it as a pet for her but I have yet again no memory of this. 5/10

Clipper - Holly's lion cub. Apparently it is 'charmed' to stay a cub forever?? Don't know how that work or why she has a lion or why she would name it Clipper?? there are better names girl. 3/10

Carmine - Cerise's dire wolf. Okay so technically they're part of the same pack or something but it's the daughter of Littler Red Riding Hood and the big Bad Wolf. You can't go wrong with giving her a wolf friend whose name is another shade of red. 6/10

Carrolloo - Kitty's caterpillar. A sneaky little guy. From what we saw of him he compliments Kitty's personality and you know, a caterpillar with a wonderlandian? It's not like I can be mad. 6/10

Clockwork - Cedar's wooded cuckoo. Okay I do actually like this a lot. Even if we never really saw him it's a great concept for her pet to be wooden like her. Especially when you consider it would probably have to been made specifically for her. I love it 8/10

Clydesdale - Farrah's pet mouse. Don't recall and there are better mice. 2/10

Divacorn - Briar's unicorn. Absolutely slayed so hard I don't care about the name which is an astonishing feat. I mean of course Briar would have a pink unicorn it just makes sense. 8/10

Drake - Hopper's dragonfly. Drake. 2/10 Only getting extra points because it is a literal DRAGONfly. He breathes fire.

Earl Grey - Maddie's dormouse. Perfection. Best dressed of all of the pets. Is a silly little guy with a silly little hat that lives in her hat. Impeccable. 10/10

Gala - Apple's snow fox. Gala is a great name just because of the fact this it is not only a type of apple but also a fancy party. Very royal, on brand, like to curl around her neck. Iconic. 8/10

Grizz - Blondie's baby bear. Blondie. Girlie. You are a reporter. Please get original. A bear for goldilocks' daughter is fine but it's just like. I'm bored girl. You can do better. 3/10

Jelly - Ginger's gummy fish. I. Love this. A sentient gummy fish she accidentally made? So iconic I'll ignore the basic name. It's like naming your goldfish 'Goldie'. Anyway, I love the concept, love the execution. 8/10

King Benedict - Humphrey's chicken. No. 2/10 for egg related name.

Mr. Cottonhorn - Dexter's jackalope. Guys. Guys. look at him.

He's just a little guy. 10/10.

Moustro - Melody's rat. I like the idea and the pun name but I feel like I'd need to see a picture to be impressed. 5/10

Nevermore - Raven's dragon. There is no need for discussion. 10/10

P-Hawk - Daring's peacock. I think I remember him being kind of terrible so uh 1/10 because Daring I don't think that's how you say peacock honey.

Pesky - Hunter's squirrel. I love how even though they're like enemies they have the same haircut and Pesky has a little acorn bag that Hunter definitely made for him. Lives up to his name. 7/10

Philia - Cupid's Pegasus. Apparently 'Philia' is one of the ancient greek words for love that is often translated to friendship. soooo, even though I didn't know about her she gets a 6/10 because I think that's sweet.

Pirouette - Duchess's swan. Queen. Icon. Slay. Need I say more? 10/10

Sandella - Ashlynn's phoenix. The fact that Ashlynn has a phoenix because it rises from the ashes is so hardcore and I love it. Even if her name is Sandella. 7/10

Shuffle - Lizzie's hedgehog. The bestest and cutest little croquet ball. I don't have much to say but love you dearly. 7/10

Sir Gallopad - Darling's horse. He can change colour and camouflage which is THE coolest thing. Horsegirl Darling. 8/10 Also Daring officially has the worst pet out of the Charming siblings.

Spindle - Faybelle's pomeranian. Of course an evil fairy you have such an unassuming evil little dog. And of course she named it after her evil destiny. Iconic. 8/10.

[cloudyevaa]

— warning!!! spoilers for the 2.1 genshin impact archon quest, and a lot of disappointment up ahead. also disclaimer: i am not by any means qualified to give this criticism lol this is just my take and my opinion on the quest's execution, and i need a place to rant.

I can't be the only one who feels very conflicted about the 2.1 archon quest, right??

I think one of the appeals of inazuma's main story was the fact that there was a war, an ongoing conflict between a nation and its deity - the fact that the archons' moralities are not so black and white as we'd thought is hammered home by the dictating reign of the raiden shogun, in contrast to both rex lapis and barbatos, who have directly aided the traveller in their previous endeavours.

the 2.1 archon quest, though?? it feels as if ei is played off to just be a lonely and misunderstood deity, and she so easily changes after... what? yae miko visits her in her realm of euthymia? the shogun knew of the repercussions of the vision hunt decree, the tenryou commission's involvement with the fatui, and even the civil war.

so why was the plot building up to the reveal that the raiden shogun may have just been mislead by false commission reports? what difference does it make that both the tenryou and kanjirou commissions have betrayed the shogun if she already knew they colluded with the fatui?

I hold nothing against ei's character — in fact, I love the way her ideals seem perfect on paper, but works in detriment to the very people she wants to protect. I love that she struggles to understand how eternity is not stagnation, and that growth is the only thing that will stay forever unchanging, because all moments are fleeting, and all life ends.

but mihoyo makes it extremely hard for me to enjoy her story completely when all we do is fight her and rely on the power of friendship vision bearers' ambitions to change her mind about the vision hunt decree. like, ,, what gives?? everything happened so quickly, how could she so easily throw away the ideals she's been so adamantly holding onto for decades?

I haven't done her story quest, but it looks like she's not even being taken accountable for being the spearhead in a literal civil war. all those vision bearers who lost their lives ( including kazuha's friend ), all the common people she has harmed because of her tunnel vision - she lifts the vision hunt decree and she is suddenly absolved? of course, I don't want a perfect morally good character, but at the very least mihoyo can show us that she is not so perfect so as to suddenly change her mind about the vision hunt decree and sporadically feel compassion for the very people she knows she has harmed.

I'm sure people are also really shocked about signora's death - I am too. I was never a fan of signora but her presence was always filled with mystery, intrigue, and an impending sense of doom. she was that antagonist - beautiful, hauntingly cruel, and jam-packed with unknown backstory ( as seen with the crimson witch and pale flame artifact set lore ) that I thought was going to be further explored on future quests. but?? she??? just???? dies???? and for what?

I don't mind if she dies ( in fact, I would like for an opportunity to use traveller to execute her myself ), but the fact that her death brings no substance to the overarching story, especially since scaramouche just. got the gnosis from yae miko. like, mihoyo can do signora MUCH better than this. she deserves a glorious death as a fleshed-out antagonist, yet I felt nothing for her, not even the slightest bit of satisfaction, when she disappeared into ashes.

and scaramouche. I like the guy, he's funny-looking, and kind of sadistic. the fact that he was appearing in inazuma was a welcome surprise. it made sense, considering he was confirmed to be from inazuma, and there were theories about he and the shogun's similar appearamces which I eagerly consumed. but he appears for like, 3 minutes, and then we're KNOCKED OUT???? seriously???????

when yae miko suddenly appeared I actually thought she'd betrayed us and was working with the fatui. but then she wakes us up, tells us nothing about the SINGLE MOST important exchange in the whole quest until AFTER the main conflict is resolved, and just dumps scaramouche's identity on us as a SIDE COMMENT. what is this tomfoolery??? we weren't even there to see it? at least give us a cutscene explaining what went down, because this was LITERALLY one of the most important parts of the entire archon quest, and one of the recurring goals of the traveller.

also, can we talk about the resistance? oh wait a minute, we can't, because they literally did nothing. absolutely nothing. they contributed a total of 0 times the whole quest. only teppei was a memorable figure, and he had more lore than the upcoming 5-star master strategist of the whole army; kokomi.

as a person who loves kokomi, i am devastated by the lack of actual role she holds within the plot. she is a famed strategist and the only reason the resistance has been holding out for so long, as kujou sara said herself. but she's not given so much as a 30-second fight scene, and we never see her cunning wits on the battlefield - we probably never will. why, you may ask? well, because the freaking war is OVER. because baal just decided to stop the vision hunt decree.

i sincerely hope there will be more substantial kokomi content during her banner where we get to see her shine, seeing as it seems that mihoyo is already nerfing her abilities and focusing their efforts into promoting ei instead.

however, seeing as the main inazuma conflict ( the vision hunt decree ) is already over and dealt with... what the frick is kokomi supposed to bring to the table??? 😃 the one character i feel that shone throughout the quest was kujou sara, who had actually had a set-up for potential character development from the previous patch. but even then she's rendered unconscious by signora in front of the archon she is the loyal right-hand of??? like y'all pls tell me I'm not dreaming.

I loved the graphics, the concept, the lore - but the execution fell flat and felt terribly rushed. I wonder if it's because mihoyo is very insistent on hyper-fixating upon the raiden shogun this update.

anyway, that was a long tangent lmao. if you enjoyed the quest, good for you!! I enjoyed it, too; but my enjoyment is far overshadowed by the glaring issues that i had with it. i'd love to hear other people's thoughts about the quest.

[mylifeinfiction]

Skeleton Crew by Stephen King

It's eternity in there.

It's really tough for me to rate and write reviews of short story collections. This one's no different. There's a lot to love, here. There are also some complete duds. I'm not going to rate each one and average it out. That's not fair to the ones that I loved, because the ones that I loved... I LOVED! So I'm just going to post the notes that I made for each story (slightly edited for clarity) as I was reading the collection.

There may be some slight SPOILERS throughout this review, so please proceed with caution.

-The Mist: A novella. Incredible. Creepy and full of dread. The prose and mystery of it all is brilliant. I loved what it had to say about heard mentality and fear of the unknown. The film is a perfect adaptation. It even 'fixes' the ending, which is the only part of this story that isn’t a hard ten. (The film's ending is perfect. And fits the rest of the story so much better than this one. However, this one still works for what it is.)

-Here There Be Tygers: Meh... It's decent at depicting the illogical nature of childhood fears and imagination, but little else.

-The Monkey: Okay, I guess?? Way too long for what it has to offer, but there are a few moments that work very well.

-Cain Rose Up: Okay (and only just okay) because of how brief it is. And I like that it doesn’t give reasons or any backstory.  It definitely feels like he wrote it around the same time he wrote Rage.

-Mrs. Todd’s Shortcut: Loved loved loved this one. The story within a story structure (which comes back very often throughout this collection... that's some tried and true King shit, right there) works beautifully, the beauty of it is poignant, the magical/paranormal aspect is so exciting. Amazing.

-The Jaunt: Another awesome one. The ideas and execution are great. The ending is fantastic. This might be the best of the whole damn bunch. I would very much like to adapt this for the screen.

-The Wedding Gig: Not terrible, but I would’ve rather it been a whole story about the fat bride rising to power and the fall thereafter. She ended up being the most interesting part of it all.

-Paranoid: A Chant: A poem. The title says it all. A man sinking further and further into his paranoia. The structure works well enough.

-The Raft: Not very good. At all. It has a cool concept that could’ve packed some serious suspense, but all the characters (aside from the first killed, Rachel) were terribly unlikable, so I really just wanted them to die... Get it all over with.

-Word Processor of the Gods: Short and sweet. A fantastic concept with superb execution. And a hopeful ending?!? Hell yeah! I loved it.

-The Man Who Would Not Shake Hands: Fun/interesting to be back in the world of The Breathing Method. I like that room and the potential mysteries/mythology it holds. The story itself is interesting if slightly long-winded. But I thoroughly enjoyed the curse angle.

-Beachworld: Not a planet I'd like to visit. Similar hypnosis slant as The Raft. Dug this one significantly more. Interesting ideas and execution, but far from the best.

-The Reaper’s Image: I do really like the idea and mythology behind cursed items and shit like that. So this one worked for me despite being one of the lighter stories in this collection. Would work well as an episode of Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities.

-Nona: Just plain bad. So very bad. A Bonnie and Clyde/Natural Born Killers vibe with a pathetic, annoying main character. Didn't work at all.

-For Owen: A poem. A nice token for his son to look back on, but absolutely nothing more. Pure filler.

-Survivor Type: This one didn't do much for me, but it does have its moments. The exceedingly rambling prose throughout actually kinda works. And there's some wonderfully stomach-churning moments in here. I just wish the character wasn’t so damn blah.

-Uncle Otto’s Truck: I liked the whole truck holding a grudge idea, but its execution was the definition of meh.

-Morning Deliveries (Milkman #1): Hard to review it on its own, as solo it works as nothing more than a character building exercise.

-Big Wheels: A Tale of the Laundry Game (Milkman #2): The better of the two milkman stories because it has the payoff. The garage scene is a little sluggish, but it all works rather well in the end because of what it all leads into.

-Gramma: Ooohh this was a good 'un. A creepy glimpse into the irrational childhood fear of the elderly. And it’s witchy, too! The ending creeped me out big time. Damn good stuff.

-The Ballad of the Flexible Bullet: Very good, but a good deal longer than it needed to be. I’m convinced King understands and translates the toll writing has on an author better than any other writer out there… maybe ever. It’s a weird and interesting tale. And of course, another story within a story situation. No one does those quite as skillfully as King.

-The Reach: Didn’t like this one - at all - until its very end and King’s notes on it. Should’ve been shorter and in a different voice. I did really like that ending, though.

This was my first short story collection of King's, so far. I'd done a couple of his novella collections, but no short stories. The ones I loved most, here - The Jaunt, Mrs. Todd's Shortcut, Word Processor of the Gods, and (of course) The Mist - just may be among some of the most exciting pieces in terms of ideas that I've read from King, yet. So I'm definitely looking forward to getting to his other short story collections, soon.

"Madness is a flexible bullet."

8/10

-Timothy Patrick Boyer.

[bagofbonesmp3]

So what's wrong with Loki TV? I wouldn't expect the MCU character to properly resemble any Loki from comics (especially because MCU Loki is effectively a different character every time he appears thanks to inconsistent writing and no one working together to ensure a coherent narrative), but am I missing something here in why they've made a mistake? I do greatly enjoy the series for what it is on its own.

i don't particularly love the series. i like making fun of Loki and the aesthetics are cool but to be honest.... i don't really care about the show anymore. before talking about the aspect of the show itself i don't like, there is the issue of the evident misogynoir of the show, which bothered me specially after the last episode.

(cw for misogynoir)

it's become evident how little the (white) show runners care about the female black characters (ravonna, hunter b-15 and hunter c-20). ravonna has had little character development asides from being a strict antagonistic character, who just keeps on intruding on Loki and Sylvie's plans for no reason apparent (that we've seen). b-15 is another black female character that gets ridiculed constantly by Loki, used by Sylvie to escape and so far I've only seen her be used as a comedic relief or an enabler for the plot, with little to no information about who she is as a character (unlike Owen Wilson, who has the same position in the agency but has way more character development). lastly, hunter c-20 gets used, hypnotized and then killed off screen by the titular white woman. these are all the black female characters in the tv show. also let's mention the fact that they get assigned numbers as names unlike Mobius does. interesting. all of these characters are either antagonists or victims with no agency. it's very fucked up to say the least. i was excited for gugu mbatha raw and wunmi mosaku to be casted in a marvel project, but the way they've been treated so far is frankly awful. this is not exclusive to the Loki show, wand*vision had the same issue with monica's character.

now with the show narratively:

the first two episodes were very strong. they focused on the mechanics of the world, loki's character and how he felt about this new environment, and the humor (which the writers are known for). but onwards, with the introduction of Sylvie's character, it stopped... being loki's show? i get that she's supposed to be another Loki but we're here for the Loki Loki guy! he's in all of the posters!!! why are we suddenly treating him like a secondary character? he just asks questions and reacts to situations. i don't care about Sylvie. also there are a bunch of plot holes in universe but that's a minor thing.

from a Loki Fan™️ standpoint:

look ngl, this must only bother me because I'm a Loki comics fan, although this IS an MCU issue in general... and that is using imagery or plot points from the comics without the actual story that makes them relevant. this is the case with Sylvie's broken horn crown, which has a whole reason to be in the comics, but here it's just a stylistic choice. and i have a feeling this is also gonna happen with kid Loki and king loki's appearance in the next episodes. they're gonna be stripped away from their meanings and be given a funny, ridiculous backstory. this is an MCU thing. they love to mock the source material and then use their imagery or concepts (and they usually execute them in a mediocre or just bad way). of course i don't expect it to be comics accurate, or to adapt these storylines right, but then simply... don't borrow from them? do your own thing? it's specially nasty because they've credited the writers and artists who made these concepts, took what they wanted from their stories, and then they mock them. loki in the MCU was always incapable to be comics Loki. but they're having all of these elements from the newer comics in their show with none of the soul.

and as an extra, hi I'm genderfluid and bisexual

why are you like this marvel!!! stop profiting from lgbt identities and then give them scraps you cunt!! i would prefer Loki remained a cishet character at this point, if I'm being honest. that little blink and then miss it moment did nothing for me. and then have the AUDACITY to market him as genderfluid, and make the "female Loki" another whole different character? there was a post that said "the Loki show had the genderfluid character be a cis man and a cis woman" AND LITERALLY that's how it feels. they didn't even paint his nails smh. Loki means a lot to me as a trans person. his latest arcs specially. i don't care about marvel's terrible rainbow capitalism. I'd rather have no rep than bad rep.

overall, i think the show is just another one of marvel's flawed and mediocre products. I'll stick around to see how it turns out, but my previous expectations of it just being a funny wacky show with small emotional moments is gone i just know it's gonna be an action packed series trying to be epic and groundbreaking and failing to do it

[dontmindmyshadowhunting]

Am I forgotten ? (KitTy Fan Fic)

KitTy fan fic based on Kit and Ty’s flower cards (art by Cassandra Jean), to celebrate the release of Ty’s latest flower card. I alternate between Kit and Ty’s POV.

If you prefer reading it on AO3 or if you have missed the previous chapters, Link is here. AO3 Link - Am I forgotten? 

Following Chapter is Chapter 5 - Blinded by the Sun

*****

Tiberius had never understood the concept of nightclubs. Of sharing loud music, like cacophony in his ears. Of sharing breath and body odors in the same crowded space. Of physical contact with mere strangers. No matter how large the room, he felt like he was trapped. Like he couldn’t breathe. Like all his senses were challenged, driven to the brink of explosion.

Tiberius clutched his pendant, his fingers reflexively stroking the heron shape in a soothing gesture he had made a habit of whenever he was confronted with stressful situations such as this one.

He had been in such a hurry that he had left the Institute without his headphones. This had been a terrible mistake. And Ty did not make mistakes. His mind never faltered, never betrayed him. Except, this was not entirely true. It only took one look into a pair of blue eyes for his mind to come tumbling down like a house of cards, as if hit by a storm, leaving a jumbled mess of incoherent thoughts.

He wasn’t going to be able to go through with it. He had to get out of here, and come back in through a back door. Not the best plan if you tried to remain inconspicuous. But this was a matter of life and death. He couldn’t stay one minute longer in this noisy, giant tin can.

He was moving towards the general direction of the exit, trying to find a clear path through the throng of strangers, when a hand gripped his shoulder. He fought the urge to take the hand off. Literally. To cut it off.

“Not so fast, Dark and Brooding” said a girly voice. Tiberius turned to look at his assailant. He could see under the glamour that she was a blue-haired Faerie. He knew enough about Faeries to know which kind. A mermaid.

“Oh my, but you are gorgeous,” she said, her eyes widening, before zeroing in on the Runes partially visible under his shirt. “I have always wanted to do it with a Shadowhunter… and you, my dear, appear to be one of their finest specimens.”

“Sorry, not interested,” Ty answered in a clipped tone. Although his gaze was directed at her collarbone, his posture must have sent a warning, because she withdrew her hand as if she had been burnt. 

He was about to move past her, doing his best to avoid physical contact, when he caught the change of expression in her face. She looked stunned, as if she had just seen the sun rising in the dark windowless room, her lips parting in awe. But she was not looking at him. Her gaze was directed at something - someone? - behind his left shoulder. Ty tensed and spun.

Kit was standing there, a grin showing white perfect teeth plastered on his face, his blond hair elegantly tousled as if he had just gotten out of bed looking like other people did after three hours at the hairdressing salon.

Actually, he looked like the Angel himself had decided to shrink to human size to walk upon the earth for one single night of debauchery. His thin white shirt did nothing to hide his muscular torso, and the broadness of his shoulders was barely concealed under a tanned leather jacket. He looked as if he owned the place. As if he could snap his fingers and get anyone to do his bidding. As if he knew he could but did not care. He looked dangerous.

And he was all Ty could see, as if he - not unlike the Faerie - had been blinded by the sun. There was only him. It was as if the crowd had vanished, as if the music had been turned off. 

Except, Ty’s heart had started playing staccato inside his chest.

****

It had not been difficult to find Ty among the crowd. Not only was he one of the tallest figures in the room, he stood out. Even as packed with Downworlders as this club was. It was as if a fairy tale character had lost his way in the modern world. Kit almost expected Sleeping Beauty or Snow White to come strolling around in the room, looking for him. The artificial lights gave his pale white skin an eerie glow, making him look even more surreal. 

As soon as Kit saw him across the room, he fought the urge to fight his way through to get to him as fast as he could. Even from a distance, he could see from Ty’s stance that he was in pain.  

Upon seeing him, Ty’s eyes widened in surprise, but he didn’t acknowledge him otherwise. He seemed to be in a state of shock. Well, you weren’t expecting me, were you?

“Sorry, I am late,” Kit said, resting his hand casually on Ty’s shoulder. Ty leaned into his touch and relaxed infinitesimally. “Difficult to find a cab in Manhattan these days.” 

The Faerie who had appeared to be talking to Ty was joined by two of her friends and the three of them were giggling and staring at Kit, as if he were a movie star who had just shown up at the club after his Premiere. Good. Focus on me. Ty doesn’t want that kind of attention.

“Evening, ladies,” he said in his most pleasant voice. “Have you been enjoying yourselves so far?”

One of the Faeries batted her eyelashes at him. “It has just turned into a very interesting evening.”

“Happy to be of service,” Kit said. He executed what he hoped was an elegant bow. It must have been, seeing how his fangirls had turned hysterical. Well, he had learnt from the best.

He mouthed a silence thanks to Jem, then turned to Ty, whispering urgently in his ear. “So, who are we planning to kill tonight?”

“Not kill. Interrogate. A Faerie. I will recognize him as soon as I see him. Two, maybe three bodyguards.” Ty jerked his head towards the far end of the room. “He will probably be spending most of the evening in one of the private rooms in the VIP section.”

Kit’s mind was racing. All his training had led to this moment. Adrenaline was coursing through his veins, and he was beginning to sense the thrill of the fight. Now was his chance to show Ty just how much he had changed from the harmless mundane to the skilled Shadowhunter. But first things first. He needed a plan.

He turned to the puzzled faces of the three Faeries who hadn’t moved from their position during his whispered exchange with Ty.

“Apologies, fair ones,” Kit said. “We’d love to stay and chat but my friend and I had a long night. We are heading home. Enjoy the rest of your evening.”

He pulled Ty away from the Faeries’ disappointed faces, to a more secluded corner of the club, with a direct view of the double doors leading to the private section of the club. He started racking his brain for a plan.

“Should we use the ladies as bait?” He asked after a moment. “We could go back and find them. We would make sure, of course, that no harm comes to them.”

Ty shot him a puzzled look before realization dawned on him.

“No,” he replied. “ From what I hear, he has a preference for….” He cleared his throat. “Men.” 

Kit paused to consider this new information. As he did, he noticed that Ty was searching his face, his eyes moving restlessly, as if he was looking for something there. What are you looking for, Ty?

“Ty,” Kit said after a moment. “Do you remember when Mark had to pretend he was in a relationship with Kieran? Do you think you could play the part of... my boyfriend tonight?” 

He hoped Ty hadn’t noticed the way his voice had risen to a high pitch when he uttered the word “boyfriend”.

Kit understood his mistake a second too late. Ty stiffened and a wave of pure panic crossed his delicate features. His hands were shaking as he grasped the heron-shaped pendant tied around his neck. My gift to him, Kit realized with a jolt. Trusting his instincts, Kit caught Ty in his arms, squeezing hard, and started stroking his shoulders, his back, applying as much pressure as he could. Ty heaved a sigh of relief and relaxed under Kit’s touch, nuzzling his face against Kit’s neck. Kit was able to breathe easily again. He had made the right call.

“Ty- Ty, I am sorry,” he said. “It was just an idea I had. A stupid idea. I will come up with another plan.”

“No, Kit,” Ty said in a quavering voice, muffled against Kit’s shoulder. “I want to help you. Except that… I don’t know how... How to act. How to play a part. I wouldn’t know what to do. Tell me what I need to do.”

“Nothing, Ty. I am not asking you to do anything. I will do the talking. You just need to… come along. I just wanted to warn you in case I touched you in… inappropriate ways.”

“That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

“That’s alright,” Ty said, in a clearer voice. “You didn’t have to ask. You can touch me anywhere you want to. I don’t mind if it’s you.” I don’t mind if it’s you. Butterflies were fluttering inside Kit’s chest and around his stomach.

“Don’t worry. I’ve got you, Ty. I’ve got you...” 

It was Kit’s own way of speaking the words he couldn’t say. I love you, Ty. I love you.

Too soon, he released Ty from his embrace, took his hand and, together, they moved towards the far end of the room.

*****

Tagging @arangiajoan @nenyx @naerysthelonesome​ @adoravel-fenomeno @unorganisedbookshelf @blindbandit1515 @whyhastgodfarsakenme @noah-herondale-lightwood @georgiaherondale @nicotheangel17 @joonjxne @that-dreamer-girl-m @mariiaarranz @writeforjordelia @shadowfae1878 @majollica-blog @mferraz ​@darkkitai @justanothermultifandomgirl @kitty-appreciation-week @gabtapia

and anyone who wants of course

[bitter69uk]

Recently watched: Voyage of the Rock Aliens (1984). Tagline: “the story of a guy, a girl and an alien... and one night they will always remember!” I’m using this period of enforced social isolation to explore the weirder corners of YouTube for long forgotten and obscure movies. (My boyfriend is accompanying me only semi-willingly).  

Incomprehensible. Stultifying. Bizarre. Botched! In the early eighties, former child actress, cherub-faced starlet and “triple threat” Pia Zadora reigned as the undisputed queen of bad movies. (Her filmography-from-hell includes crimes-against-cinema like Fake-out (1982) and The Lonely Lady (1983)). Enduring the 97-minute duration of misbegotten low-budget New Wave musical comedy Voyage of the Rock Aliens certainly justifies how Zadora earned that title. (Note: don’t confuse Voyage of the Rock Aliens with Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women (1968) – an entirely different but equally terrible film starring that earlier queen of bad movies, Mamie Van Doren). 

Voyage was calculatedly formulated to promote Zadora as a viable pop siren in the vein of Madonna or Cyndi Lauper. In fact, it opens with an epic rock video for “When the Rain Begins to Fall”, Zadora’s hi-NRG disco duet with Jermaine Jackson. The video has that artfully distressed post-apocalyptic / post-punk look typical of the era (it’s hard to overstate the stylistic influence of Mad Max in the eighties). Seemingly tacked-on at random, the video bears zero relation to what unfolds next. How to explain Voyage of the Rock Aliens? According to Wikipedia, its scriptwriter conceived it as a deliberately campy tongue-in-cheek spoof hybrid of fifties and sixties b-movie genres. A postmodern mash-up of science fiction, beach party musicals, monster movies and rock’n’roll juvenile delinquent flicks sounds potentially amusing in more competent hands, but the conception and execution here is frankly - if cheerfully - inept. 

Zany hijinks, wacky misunderstandings and “what-the-fuck” moments ensue when a group of rock’n’roll-crazed aliens (styled to vaguely resemble Devo) land their guitar-shaped spaceship on earth and try to ingratiate themselves with the local teenagers of a town called Speelburg. Voyage’s tone is established with an introductory Beach Blanket Bingo-style musical number. The song is grating. The choreography is clunky. The weather is visibly overcast and chilly. Some of the “high schoolers” are seemingly well into their late twenties. To be fair, it does offer a time capsule of eighties fashion trends: it’s a veritable day-glo riot of ra-ra skirts, crimped hair, fingerless lace gloves and wraparound sunglasses. Dee Dee (Zadora) yearns to sing with her boyfriend Frankie’s band (Frankie and The Pack) at their high school’s upcoming cotillion. But surly delinquent hoodlum Frankie (Craig Sheffer) is such a selfish, insecure jerk he won’t let her. (This scenario reminded me of Lucy constantly wanting to crash Ricky’s stage show in old episodes of I Love Lucy). The leader of the aliens (Tom Nolan) develops a crush on Dee Dee and has no qualms about her joining his band, inciting Frankie’s jealousy. 

Proceedings are padded-out with some annoying sub-plots. Two homicidal killers escape from a high security mental facility. The eccentric elderly female sheriff investigates the town’s UFO sighting. (This surely represents an unseemly career low for Academy Award-winning veteran character actress Ruth Gordon of Rosemary’s Baby and Harold and Maude fame). There’s also a sea monster whose tentacle pops up at random and is never explained. Storytelling coherence isn’t one of Voyage’s strengths: it frequently feels like some pages have gone missing from the script, or some crucial explanatory scenes have been accidentally deleted.   

Anyway, Zadora gamely tackles the acting, singing and dancing with more enthusiasm than skill. Frankie’s bandmates are played by a genuine Los Angeles psychobilly band called Jimmy and The Mustangs - a poor man’s Stray Cats, although it must be said they do provide eye candy in their mesh t-shirts and studded leather biker jackets. Speaking of which: pouting young pretty boy Craig Sheffer’s Frankie is filmed like an escapee from an eighties gay porn film, with a homoerotic focus on his sinewy torso and painted-on black jeans. With horrible symmetry, Voyage concludes by reprising “When the Rain Begins to Fall” (with Scheffer lip-syncing to Jermaine Jackson’s vocals) with some of the most half-assed green screen technology ever captured on celluloid. Clearly the filmmakers had stopped caring by then. Problem is, you will have too! 

Voyage of the Rock Aliens is FREE to view on Amazon Prime. Watch the trailer here.

[bisexualhobi]

wait I think I agree not today is really bad but now rank all their title tracks from best to worst pls

lmaoohdksjjdjf i love this question so much anon but due to the fact that i’m me this would get way WAY too long. so i’m doing the top 5 best title tracks and then top 5 worst ones okay? i’m looking at google and apparently they have 26 korean singles so yeah that’s too much.

to rank them as objectively as possible I'm gonna try to take into account gp impact (which is not the same as chart impact since the fandom inflates those numbers), production, creative value (how innovative/different from other pop songs was it?) and the concept of the music video/aesthetic in general. 

BTS TITLE TRACKS: TOP 5

5. Black Swan (2020)

am I cheating by putting here a pre release single? maybe. but it would be a disservice to leave this one out so bear with me

⭐gp impact: this song made more noise as a pre release single than the title track. I saw it in at least 3 end of the year editorials for best kpop songs of 2020. and the thing is it could have been WAY bigger but a lot of stuff happened that sadly made it go away too soon. I don't think this one is as famous or recognizable as the others in this list which is why it's going last, but also I think this song is the most underrated gem in bts discography so it's still going here.

⭐production: this song beat out the front runners (I need u, save me, DNA) solely because of its production. there are not a lot of kpop songs out there that manage to pull off what this song does. it's powerful, it's nostalgic, it's a dark and sexy song without being too on the nose. the mixing is SUPERB I remember the first time I heard it I thought "this would blow the fuck up if it was a Travis Scott song" and I will DIE on that hill. this is an example of heavy autotune on a song done right, not like the rest of their super autotuned songs that sometimes come out unrecognizable and empty sounding.

⭐creative value: it's not truly a new concept in pop to make a song about the Death of the Artist. it’s also not something a rookie group can do, this song needed to be released at exactly the time in bts’ career that it was. there’s just no emotional impact if you just sing about how the music makes your hear beat and you’ve been in the industry for,,, 3 years. this is the type of Swan Song you release at the peak of your career, so that really contributes to the message. mixing a trap beat with a ballet motif is GALAXY BRAIN SHIT.

⭐️concept: the ballet influence is just beautifully executed, this song is a beautiful piece of craftsmanship on all fronts. i think they could literally build an entire ALBUM off this concept, so the fact that they jampacked it onto one single song is both amazing and a little sad for me. i wanna hear more of this. i want a literal Black Swan (the darren aranofsky movie) horror concept where the protagonist falls prey to his own madness because he strives for perfection. but yeah, the song itself and the orchestral version just make this a complete golden concept in my book.

4. IDOL (2018).

⭐️gp impact: i think a lot of people that didn’t know anything about kpop vaguely knew about this song when it was released. i know i wasn’t into kpop at all but in my pop culture circle there was a small bleep from this song bc of the concept and the dance. i think it’s a great “embassador of kpop” track, like if you wanna explain to someone with no previous knowledge what kpop is about you can show them a performance of this song.

⭐️production: the production is a little all over the place for me. the instrumentals are amazing and really creative tho, but like in terms of mixing vocals and the structure of it, it might be a little too grating. it’s not the best produced song in ly: answer by any means but it still makes it work

⭐️creative value: the whole hanbok thing is a 10/10. bts weren’t the first ones to do it, but they did it in such a tightly executed way that honestly that “classic korean roots meets the edgy western feel” concept belongs to them now. groups are still recreating it. it’s a really innovative concept in general.

⭐️concept: the music video is,,,, something. you might love it or hate it, but it’s memorable. i think the purposeful way in which they made it as loud and brilliant as possible can be taken either as a camp adjacent or just as the group going nuts with the budget, which props to them. the choreography is also a BIG plus. the south african influence is really well executed and they made sure to do it as cultural appreciation and not appropriation. definitely the most memorable thing from this song is the choreo

3. Run (2015).

⭐️gp impact: this was their second song to have a music show win. it was the lead single from hyyh pt2 and honestly it might be the best song off hyyh as a whole. it cemented bts as not just another kpop group, because it made non fans turn their heads too! from what i gather this really propelled them forward and made the fanbase grow a lot.

⭐️production: hyyh pt2 is super well produced. i feel like this song in particular makes a fine job of mixing the vocals but it’s not outstanding. the best part is the instrumentals. but overall it’s a really good song with amazing lyrics and a great melody.

⭐️creative value: this built off of what they did with pt1 so they were already in a comfortable place, when they found this sound they really explored it well and deep and it works! i’m glad they went this emo pop route because it was a good contrast to what was dominating the charts in kpop in 2015.

⭐️concept: the aesthetic is PERFECT. there’s not a single other thing that i could add or that i wanted gone. it’s the perfect mix of coming of age teen film and heartfelt, dreamy pop. the music video is by no surprises the favorite mv of a lot of the fandom. the cinematography is beautiful and the song and the video perfectly capture that fleeting moment in life when you’re in the brink of adulthood.

2. Mic Drop (2017).

⭐️gp impact: this song was the first bts song to chart on the billboard hot100. back when the fandom had no idea how to chart, mass buy etc. that’s enough said. (personally i think mic drop is the quintessential bts song and their best release so the fact that i’m not putting it first should count as something).

⭐️production: for the purposes of this ranking i’m using the original mic drop and not the steve aoki remix even tho it was the steve remix that was released as the single. the song has the BEST mastering i’ve heard in kpop. the transitions are flawless, the beat is pure fire, the entire first minute is literally the hardest hype rap i’ve heard in kpop. everything about it WORKS.

⭐️creative value: it’s kinda funny how this song got released the same year as kendrick lamar’s humble, because imho it’s the best hiphop song of that year after humble. 2017 was truly the year of the diss tracks. bonus points for including it right after the billboard acceptance speech skit in ly: answer. SUPER refreshing among the ed sheeran type of pop that dominated that year.

⭐️concept: it’s a great concept but not innovative by any means. still, it works and bts managed to exploit it to the max. the choreo, the mv, the styling, everything was amazing!

1. Blood, Sweat & Tears (2016).

⭐️gp impact: it's probably the first song to put bts on the map beyond the kpop sphere. it really set the tone for their 2017. it's one of their most famous and recognizable songs to date.

⭐️production: this song is STUNNINGLY arranged. the mix, the ambience, the progression,,, it's all brought together to make a very well crafted song. it has a distinctive electronic/pop sound to it that still manages to set itself apart from the trend that was going at the time. black swan is probably the closet single they have to this in terms of production.

⭐️creative value: the song itself is very in compliance with the 2015/2016 trend of hype songs with edm influence, (ie. closer, shape of you, cheap thrills, let me love you, something just like this, etc.) but it still packs that punch that makes it sound fresh even for 2021.

⭐️concept: it wasn't the first song to sound like this in kpop ofc but it was the first truly sexy concept for bts. the aesthetic is innovative and very well thought out, the mv is amazing and the choreography too. i read somewhere that j-hope had a lot of input for this choreo so that's amazing. also blond taehyung is literally the best thing to come out of big hit.

WORST BTS TITLE TRACKS

ok so here we go with the worst ones! this is in ascending order as i prepare myself to pick the worst of them all, but please remember this isn’t meant to be mean spirited, i am simply applying the same criteria to their most underwhelming songs but that doesn’t mean they don’t have their own merit! it’s just that out of 26 singles, SOME of them have got to come out at the bottom right?

5. Life Goes On (2020)

⭐gp impact: this song is not memorable with the general public, its #1 on the bb was the product of mass buying and even though it's a feel good song made to comfort fans in the times of pandemic it's still bland and boring. I think it had no music show appearances either, and as far as bts ballads go this is just bottom tier. it’s not that it’s terrible, it’s just very underwhelming 

⭐production: the autotune in this song is very poorly executed, it doesn't add to the song the way black swan does for example. it's just off putting and the melody is really forgettable. it's funny bc the chorus is directly pulled from the 2018 reggaeton super hit "La Canción" by J Balvin and Bad bunny lmaooo 💀 so I can't get that out of my head either. the structure is just fine and has nothing of substance 

⭐creative value: the song is attempts to be a heartfelt acoustic song but it really has nothing that sets it apart from other songs product of the pandemic like Justin and ariana's stuck with u. for a song in a self produced album it's the song with the least input from the group. the lyrics are good, but they're not as sincere or groundbreaking as for example Spring day. 

⭐concept: as a ballad ofc I'm not expecting it to have a grand choreography, and the mv being filmed in their personal dorms to reflect the lockdown is actually a nice touch but besides that there is nothing exciting, innovative or even sincerely comforting about the song and the concept. the greatest thing abt it is the fact that jk directed the video, which is actually pretty good.

4. We are bulletproof pt 2 (2013)

⭐gp impact: this song made no noise back in the day and to this day its just beloved by the fandom due to a sense of nostalgia and "remembering bts' roots". don't get me wrong it's amazing that bts still perform it in the year of our lord 2020 because you can't forget where you came from, but it's not a good or memorable song by any means. 

⭐production: I went back to listen to it for this and oh god. I can't remember the mixing being THIS bad. jimin, jin and taehyung sound exceptionally bad, they don't sound like themselves especially jin. it's just a really poorly mastered song, but then again the rest of their debut album isn't far better. 

⭐creative value: this is straight up ripping off early 2000s black culture from the US. not only the music, the styling for this era in general is unfortunately really bad and culturally appropriating and overall it's a mess. 

⭐concept: there is nothing of substance to be said about this song. it's just really a miss. the mv is terrible, the only thing that can be salvaged from this is the choreography, but besides that the whole thing feels sloppy, rushed and is also kinda cringey.

3. N.O. (2013)

⭐gp impact: no noise. this song was just a really weird pick for their first comeback when attack on bangtan or coffee was right there. not to be mean but no wonder they didn't have a music win this year. 

⭐production: it's an objectively bad song. it's just really underwhelming, the whole mixing feels amateur. it's not a good hiphop song and it's not a good vocal arrangement and the chorus is also a rip off of a late 90s American song I can't find right now 

⭐creative value: this song isn't innovative in any way, it's just..... there. very meh in general, I have nothing more to say about it 

⭐concept: the storyline kinda wants to go somewhere with the music video but it doesn't manage to make a connection. the styling is plain, simple and not flattering at all. it tries to make a protest of the Korean school system but it doesn't say anything beyond "school bad" which we already knew

2. Not Today (2017)

⭐gp impact: its a very middle of the list song for a lot of the fandom. I literally know of no one that claims this as their favorite mv/era/song. when you ask people about their least favorite bts songs they won't mention this one either, you know why? because it's that irrelevant. it had no music show wins either. it's precisely because of this why I put it so high up on the list. there's nothing worse than an unmemorable song, if it was widely hated then at least that would be a response. 

⭐production: it's a really mediocre song in terms of structure and melody. it tried to be hype but it falls short. the chorus feels half finished and the message of the song is just “the revolution has begun”? which okay? but it adds nothing to the You never walk alone album either.

⭐creative value: there is nothing exciting about this song, and the chorus is too grating. the rhythm is repetitive and nothing new either in kpop or pop in general. 

⭐concept: sadly there's not a lot to be said for the song. it says nothing of value and what it says falls flat. there's no innovation. you can actually see a lot of idol in this song, and also ON. those two songs are what this one tried to be but failed.

1. War of Hormone (2014)

⭐gp impact: thankfully none. this song got the treatment it deserved, if they had won a music show for this one it would feel tainted lol. now it's just a meme in the fandom but overall it made zero noise and contributed nothing to bts' evolution 

⭐production: the production is very lazy, which is odd because dark & wild has some pretty tight tracks. but this one is just meh, nothing outstanding and the melody is just annoying 

⭐creative value: this is a song that was probably born out of the desperation to have a gp friendly hit. it tries really hard to replicate an outdated idea of what boy bands should be, and it does it badly. simply put this song is very mediocre and misogynistic and the fact that it's a running gag in the fandom that "feminism isn't important when war of hormone comes on" isn't funny and it's actually cringe. please stop 

⭐concept: the styling is so ugly :( the mv is very low budget which isn't surprising but they managed to make more with less in past releases. it's just embarrassing and I wish this song didn't exist, there's a reason why they never play it anymore lol. overall a dark mistake in bts' career

[totallypathet]

Episode Four

Okay so first things first, I love a ball. I'm just not that psyched when they do them so early on in the season, because it feels so overwhelming when there's 12 queens doing 3 looks each, there's just sooo much to process! Having said all that, I do absolutely adore the ball challenges because it shows us so much about each queen. It's always interesting watching their creative processes and how they think. My favourites in the ball challenges are the ones who really *KimChi voice* embrace the materials. I just find it so boring when they just sort of glue stuff to corsets and don't really incorporate the materials of the challenge. So having said that, let's get into it!

1. Aiden Zhane

Miss Aiden... after the runways the only thing I had to say about Aiden was "really girl?".

She put so little effort into that third outfit. She put less effort into that that Derrick Berry put into the book ball. It was basic, bitch, don't come at it like "well I have a simple aesthetic" simplicity is not low effort. Simplicity is not basic. Simplicity is Gigi Goode's Lady Baller look. It was simple; but it was perfectly fitted, it was a fully realised concept, the fabric choices were perfect - it's simple, but it's effective, it's beautiful, and it's a story. That fucking corset was terrible, and she should've lipsynced for that alone. Her Lady Baller look was cute, I liked the reference, but I've seen it before. Her Basketball wife was horrific. I own that dress, and it's cheap and tacky. Speaking of cheap and tacky, can we talk about that black wig she wore with her third look?! Like don't get me wrong, I'm so glad that she's wearing a different fucking wig finally, but that wig came straight out of a bag and she put it on her head. It had that awful cheap synthetic shine, and I can't believe noone mentioned it.

She's so unpolished and I feel like she just doesn't even care. Shes like Shangie season 2 except not even 10% as charming or likeable. I am so ready for her to leave, and the fact that she's survived 2 eliminations already is beyond me.

2. Brita

Almost everything I've just written above about Aiden Zhane could also apply to Brita. I really really don't like her attitude. She's coming across so bitter and so cocky at the same time - and what's even worse is that I've seen no talent from her to justify her attitude at all!

This week was not a good week for Brita, and honestly I think she should have gone home. I actually really liked her Lady Baller look, it was a clever concept, it was immediately recognisable and it was styled well. The fact that her other two looks were utterly shocking makes me think that that first look was entirely the work of a designer and she had no input whatsoever. The second look?? Where she was like "oh it's an adaptation of Kim K's Met Gala look??? Delusional. Girl, it looked so fucking cheap, it didn't fit that well, and it was ugly ugly ugly. Kim K would never.

All of that pales in comparison to the third look. What was that? Honestly, what the fuck was that? It was so badly made, it looked ugly, it was unrecogniseable, and it was just a catastrophe. I was humiliated for her when she walked out in it. Her lipsyn also wasn't that good. She should be next to leave after Aiden Zhane.

3. Crystal Methyd

Listen, I love Crystal. What the fuck was she wearing for her Basketball Wife look? Choices. Other than that little blip, Crystal made me so happy this week!! He Lady Baller look was perfect, it was exactly the level of fun and quirky I wanted from Crystal, she totally sold me that 80s bowling fantasy! And then her third look!!!! The Carmen Miranda reference was perfect, that dress fit her impeccably, and it moved beautifully! I think she's going to just go from strength to strength and I am so excited to watch her! I never know what she's going to be wearing when she comes around the corner and I love it. Strong night for Crystal!

4. Gigi Goode

I mean, you handed Gigi Goode a design challenge and expected her not to win??? She sold me every look this week, and I loved it. She gave me 3 distinct and recognisable characters, and her presentation of each one was totally different, that's talent. I don't have all that much to say about Gigi this week, because it was all said on the show. She killed it, I think she's going all the way and I cant wait to see what she pulls out next.

5. Heidi N Closet

LET 👏 HEIDI 👏 KEEP 👏 HER 👏 NAME! I'm still so mad about that and I'm not over it. Heidi had a bit of a slip this week for me. Not nearly enough to deserve being in the bottom (especially not next to Aiden and Brita), but it wasn't a great week for her. Her first look was really ill fitting and unfortunate, but I do respect that she took the golf ball and club out on the runway, props can be unpredictable. The second look was cute, but it was just cute, and her third look... wow. I get what she was going for, that very high fashion androgyny, but...that green and that purple... someone put in that gif of Chrissie Teigen 😬😬. I'm glad this happened when there were enough people for her to fall middle of the pack, because she deserves better than to go home for some shoddy looks. But honestly, I do hate when queens go on this show and say "I don't know how to sew, I've only ever made one garment", you know you're coming on the show!!! Learn some sewing basics!! Make some dresses!! You know there's going to be sewing challenges, prepare yourself!!

6. Jackie Cox

Jackie Cox 😍😍😍 Jackie should absolutely have been top 3 this week!! Every. Single. Look. Was. Stunning. Her references were on point. Her shapes were gorgeous. Her presentations were perfect. Her characters were all recognisably different. But all the looks were recognisably Jackie. Jackie was Robbed. She gave me my whole life this week.

7. Jaida Essence Hall

Jaida was absolutely gorgeous this week! Her face is always stunning, but she brought it with her outfits too! And the third outfit was probably my favourite of the week, she knows her body, she understand her shapes and you know what it was nicely executed. I think Jaida is super solid and I don't think a whole lot in this competition is going to phase her.

8. Jan

Jan was also robbed!! I'm still thinking about her Basketball Wife look, how perfect was that! It was exactly what you would see a Basketball Wife wearing, at a Basketball Game. So on point. And the Janel bag? Iconic.

Her Lady Baller look was absolutely what I wanted from her as well! It was made of footballs! (I refuse to say soccer balls, I'm not American) And then she dribbled a football down the runway! In heels! Stunning.

Her third look was couture, high fashion, and so distinctive from her other 2 looks. Honestly top 3 should have been Jan, Jackie and Gigi. You can't change my mind.

9. Nicky Doll

This was a great week for Nicky! Which, to be fair, was to be expected in a fashion challenge. But she did a fabulous job! I think her Lady Baller was my favourite of all the Lady Baller looks. The makeup was perfect, the wig was stunning - also I challenge anyone to clock Nicky Doll's wigs! It's so strange that out of drag she has dark hair and it looks stunning, but when in drag she's mostly a blonde and it's so perfect on her. The gilet she wore for her second look was stunning, and I loved her styling. That third look?! Iconic. It was like the high fashion baby of Roxxxy Andrews' Sugar Ball look, and Yvie Oddly's Farm to Fashion look. I loved it. I love her. I think she has a really great personality too! I don't get what the judges are saying about her not having any personality. I really hope she pulls it out next week - I already know her runway is going to be perfect!

10. Rock M Sakura

Oh my baby Rock! She didn't deserve to be bottom 2 this week. Everything she did was just a tiny bit off. Her pads were a little weird this week, I'm not sure what happened there, but that did throw me off when she was walking. Her Lady Ballers look was great! I didn't get the judges critiques about it not being enough! If she'd have worn something elaborate on the bottom, they would have said it was too much - which is exactly the critique she got for her third look! I do agree that her second look was a little bit pedestrian. I actually lived her third look though! It was over the top, but that's Rock M's style! And the way she styles it was gorgeous. I liked that it wasn't a complete dress, it looked really sculptural and architectural. The fact that she went home and Aiden Zhane was safe is so beyond me. Robbed. Also she is a better performer than Brita, she just struggled with that dress, which is such a shame. I'm glad they really let us get to know her before she left though, she's not just going to be that "oh yeah her" queen who shows up at the finale.

11. Widow Von Du

I like Widow so much, but I don't know that she's going to go all the way at the moment. I really really really want her to pull it out next week! She was so amazing that first week, and since then she's just sort of coasted for me. Her looks this week were just okay. Her first look was really stunning, but the cheap horse stick prop made it look costumey, which is such a shame. Her second look was pretty, but it swallowed her up a bit, I felt like it was wearing her. Her third look I actually really liked but omg those shoes. What was she thinking. It ruined the whole thing for me. I really want her to succeed and I'm keeping my fingers crossed for her next week!

There is one other thing I'd like to say about this week, which is that the Miss Trunchbull look that walked itself down the runway was incredible. If anyone knows the designer of that look, please let me know, because they deserve recognition for how great that look was.

Edit: @rattlethosestars let me know the designer of the look is Florence D'Lee, who you can follow on instagram here!

Otherwise, that's all for the breakdown this week! I am so looking forward to "Gay's Anatomy" next week, I feel like it could be such a entertaining challenge!

[badsext]

Kid Klaus’ Christmas

The Concept: Hazel and Cha Cha go back earlier in time (before Five even learns about the apocalypse) to storm the Hargreeves mansion and take him out. They bungle it again…

Warnings: Mentions of abuse, drug use, underage drinking, violence. —————————– Fourteen year old Klaus wakes up from another night of barely sleeping. He listens for the others. Nothing. So he reaches under the mattress for the bag of weed he’s been hiding from Mom. He stuffs a towel under the door, rolls a sloppy joint and lights it, takes a few drags. It is strange to be the first one up, he thinks. But he just shrugs it off and pops a new mixed tape into his Walkman, one he made for himself with songs from The Smiths, The Cure, and Depeche Mode, songs of aching and longing.

Klaus lays back down, pulls the headphones over his ears and closes his eyes to enjoy his moment of peace before morning drills. Grace always knocks. He makes sure the volume is just low enough to be able to hear it. He smokes until the joint is so small it burns his fingertips, hides the evidence and sprays some cologne he stole from Diego. Klaus’ stomach is rumbling at this point, so he gets dressed in his uniform and ventures out of his room to see if breakfast is ready.

All the bedroom doors are open. The hallway is empty. The kitchen is empty. “Mom?…Pogo?” Klaus snatches a banana to eat while he continues to look for signs of life. How early is it exactly and where did everybody go, he wonders. He goes into the parlor. Mom has decorated - a tasteful Douglas Fir and literal boughs of holly. Funny how little they actually celebrate, but it’s Christmas Eve and at least the place looks the part. Klaus checks the old reliable grandfather clock for the time, but becomes deeply distracted by his reflection in the glass.

Something suddenly catches his eye. Moving figures in the courtyard change the shape of the light streaming through the adjacent windows. A twinge of fear sends Klaus to hide behind a column and peer through the curtains to see who it is. If he did miss drills, that probably means more hours locked in the mausoleum. To his surprise, there are two suited masked figures with guns standing in the snow. Maybe this is a test.

Hargreeves believes that guns are a crutch, especially for those with powers. The only gun in the house is Reggie’s old big game hunting rifle in the garage, which is too far away to be of use at the moment. Klaus needs a plan, but first he needs to hide, so he heads for the attic, his favorite hiding spot. Reggie wouldn’t be caught dead up there among the dust bunnies and old junk - that was the servant’s domain, so it was a good place to escape the old man’s torment for a while. The floorboards in the mansion make creaky music in certain spots, but Klaus has them memorized so he could avoid them when sneaking out at night.

From the attic with his ear to the floor, he can hear the intruders. “This place looks empty. It’s Christmas, right? I thought the kid was going to be here.”

“Well, look around. If we don’t find him maybe we can get a clue or something. Climbing that wall was a real bitch. I’m not leaving empty handed.”

“Let’s split up. Check all the rooms. We can’t fuck it up like last time.”

Last time? Who are these people and which kid are they looking for? Am I just paranoid?, Klaus considers the fact that he’s still pretty stoned. But if this is real, as the apparent ‘man of the house,’ he would need to step up. Scared, angry, demoralized…Klaus is all of these things, but he loves every one of his siblings and would be damed if he’d let a couple of masked assholes hurt even a hair on their heads. He determines that whatever he does, Reginald is likely to throw him in the mausoleum for more ‘conditioning,’ so he might as well just go for it.

Klaus takes some old drawing paper and a charcoal pencil from an unmarked box. Here he finds drawings, elicit ones of Hargreeves at his worst. Some are funny, some are just accurate. Maybe he is not the only one using the attic to escape. He regains his focus and begins sketching out a map of the mansion. If they are searching the bedrooms, he’d need to start at the other end of the mansion setting traps. They have been taught this skill, though Klaus has spent many of these lessons high, as he’s recently discovered how it provides some relief from his terrible power. He’d have to get creative. He looks around and spots Luther’s old dumbbells that are no doubt too light for him now. Maybe he could wait from above and drop them on these fools cartoon anvil style. He reaches for one and struggles to lift it, but it won’t budge. Nope. Okay, what else do we have up here…

He locates some darts, sharp ones that Hargreeves once made them throw at each other for practice. When they asked why they couldn’t use targets, Hargreeves insisted that they needed to feel a sense of urgency or it was a waste of everyone’s time. When the children hesitated, Hargreeves threatened them with punishment, as if it wasn’t punishment enough. Grace provided first aid for the resulting wounds. It was a miracle nobody lost an eye. Klaus stuffs several of the darts into his pockets.

Diego brings his knives any time he leaves the house, so Klaus wouldn’t have access to any of those, but the kitchen is full of knives and other sharp and heavy things. Allison has a flat iron in the bathroom that could come in handy. He recalls having experimented with it on his naturally curly hair. He could hear the chime of the clock in the distance. It was time to get serious. He collects some rope, super glue, and a flask he’d stashed up there for emergencies. It’s lighter than he remembers. Klaus suspects he’s not the only one using liquid courage. It is another reminder that he’s not the only kid suffering at the hands of his father. Whoever those goons downstairs are after would be counting on him. He hardens his resolve and climbs down the ladder to execute his plan.

In the kitchen Klaus rigs a mixing bowl full of every knife, blade, scissor, corkscrew, basically anything sharp and a blunt instrument or two above the door with the hope that something is bound to fall at the perfect angle to do some damage. It is hard not to make noise, but the kitchen is one floor and several rooms away from the bedrooms where the villains are searching. Klaus oils the floor as he exits and moves onto the parlor.

He finds a few packs of replacement violin strings on Vanya’s music stand. He ties them together between the columns to create a zigzag pattern. If it does’t trip them up at least it will slow them down, he figures. He hears them arguing in the distance followed by a loud crash and a chorus of metal clangs. 'Yes!’ Klaus celebrates silently with a little wink to the taxidermied owl on the wall.

“Now we know you’re here setting your cute little traps! We’re gonna get you, you little bastard!”

Klaus hurries up the stairs to the bathroom. He snatches Allison’s flat iron and applies some eyeliner, a little war paint, while he waits for the iron to heat up to 450 degrees. He brings the hot iron to Reginald’s study. Klaus removes the millionaire’s garish portrait to reveal a safe, a safe to which he knows the combination and has for months. He’s never taken anything, for that there would be hell to pay. He just opens it from time to time, touching the objects inside for the personal satisfaction. He sticks the hot iron inside, hides the cord and leaves it wide open. Then he stands at the base of the stairs. “I’m right here. Don’t you two have guns?”

Klaus dodges a barrage of bullets that miss as the bumbling assassins trip through his maze of wires. The chase is on. Klaus runs through the study and out through the other side, squeezing a generous layer of super glue on the door knob and closing the door behind him. The bad guys enter the study. “Hey look at that,” the big one sees the open safe.

“There’s nothing in there. Why would they leave an open safe with something in it? I’m sure the little shit took everything of value,” the short one replies.

“No, there’s something in there,” he insists, reaching blindly inside and grabbing the hot styling tool. He screams, shaking his burnt hand.

“You’re an idiot,” the short one goes for the door. Her hand becomes stuck. She is sure to lose some skin removing it.

By this time, Klaus has called the police and is waiting in the foyer. He goes to sit and is startled by sudden sharp pains in his thighs and buttocks. He remembers the darts in his pockets. The villains stumble down the stairs. Their masks are gone and it’s clear they have taken a beating. Each of them have handkerchiefs wrapped around their dominant hands, now barely able to hold their guns. This is the first time they have seen each other close up and face to face. Klaus is nervous and frightened.

“Hazel, is this the kid? I don’t even think this is the right kid.”

“Jesus, Cha Cha, I don’t know. Whoever he is I’m gonna kill him.”

A spark of recognition comes over Cha Cha’s face. “This is the kid - the guy in the towel we kidnapped…the junkie with a choking kink. Look at that face and add fifteen years.”

“Holy fuck. You’re right. Grab him. I want to make an example of this one.”

Klaus starts throwing darts as they approach. Police lights flash outside. It is too late to escape now. They are surrounded on all sides. Klaus has the satisfaction of watching them get taken away in handcuffs. Cha Cha’s words made no sense…well, most of them. Klaus is pulled aside for questioning. They give him a blanket and a glass of water while they take his statement. When Hargreeves and the rest of the clan return home, the police turn their questions to Hargreeves. Klaus overhears the police being offered and accepting money for their silence. The kids look at Klaus incredulously, too afraid to say anything in front of their father. Diego comes up to Klaus. “I tried to wake you up, but Dad said we needed to leave you behind…I was going to say you missed a wild mission today, but it looks like you had one of your own…That’s pretty cool how you managed to capture those two. Merry Christmas, man.”

“Merry Christmas.”

@bubblyani @helena-way07 @writingthosedaydreams @moorehollandplz @chipster-21 @bi-satanist @therealzoeyael @siriuslynore @yeetskeetbuddy @renegadesheehan @chokemerobert @fandomaddicted123 @dandycandy75 @zoemassingale @cottagecompanion @klaushollandyoung @klaushargreeves420 @dopeybubbles @zombiedixon89 @onedaysoonyoullsee @feral-cat-lady @eightpolygonidiots @vinawyatt

[what-the--curtains]

Braving the Elements

Chapter 13: To Russia with Love

TW: Swearing

Song(s)

Keep it Comin Love - KC & The Sunshine Band (song playing on radio when they drive to hotel)

Cold as Ice - Foreigner (Just for the overall chapter, its cold i had too!)

Authors note: I know its from russia with love but I liked this one better!

You're sitting in the living room filing your nails and minding your own business when you’re called into the meeting room.

“Alright everyone suit up, we’ve got the locates on his houses! Luckily, it looks like Roman hasn’t flown anyone into any of the countries recently so we can assume that they’re empty. That being said, once you arrive at your destinations you’re still expected to stake them out for the first two days, if there’s no activity on the second day you can place cameras around the location and hook them up to the systems we’ve provided you with. If nothing happens, if no activity is detected, then you’ll get the go ahead to move into the house and get those files. If at any point you suspect someone is watching you, or that you’ve been made, inform SHIELD and get out as soon as possible. Everyone got it?” Tony pauses to see if anyone has questions.

“Good! We’ve split everyone into teams. Myself and Peter will be going to Hawaii, Sam, you and Clint will be heading to Italy. Wanda and Vision you’ll go to Sweden, leaving the rest of you to Russia.”

“Why so many in Russia?” Sam asks.

“Frankly, it’s more likely he has eyes there, so safety in numbers.”

“How did you pick where people are going, I mean really Tony why do you get to go to an island paradise?” you complain. You were not the type of person who enjoyed frigid temps.

“Well, because I’m in charge so I get to decide.” He says smugly before leaving.

“Well it was really great working with you all, but I have to quit because I refuse to freeze to death in the Siberian wilderness!” you say throwing your hands in the air and slowly sliding down your chair

“Oh c’mon it won’t be that bad!” Sam say laughing

“Says the boy who gets to go to ITALY.” You say emphasizing every syllable of the last word.

“Who’s the drama queen now!” he retorts, causing you to sit back up in your chair and stop complaining. After wallowing In self-pity for a few more minutes you get up and go pack before getting in one of the team's jets with Nat, Steve and Bucky.

Day 1

The jet lands deep in the Russian wilderness in the early hours of the morning. You’re met by a group of agents who hand over keys to a truck which you all pile into.

“Jesus fuck its cold here. Who has a holiday home in Russia anyways?” you ask, leaning forward to turn up the heat from the back seat.

“It's actually pretty beautiful here in the summer, but you're right it is way too cold right now!” Nat responds, rubbing her hands on her thighs to warm them up.

“Oh come on, it’s not that bad, I don’t hear Bucky complaining” Steve chimes in,

“Ya, easy for you to say! You two have super serum making you hot!” You retort.

“Aw you hear that Buck, she thinks we're hot” Steve says, pretending to be flattered.

“Oh shut up Steve I’ve seen your bare ass.” You respond, causing Bucky to snort and Nat to shoot you daggers.

“ Can’t you control the elements make some fire or whatever” he says

“Firstly, that’s not how it works and secondly, engulfing my body in flames isn’t exactly a solution if you ask me.” Although you had contemplated it briefly.

You pull into a small hotel on the outskirts of town at around noon.

“Alright, stakeout rotation, Y/N and Nat you're up first, we’ll get everyone checked in while you’re out.” You and Nat drive the truck out to Romans house, parking it in the driveway of the neighbouring cabin. The two of you move to the back seat and pull out your binoculars zooming in on Romans place. It was a large wood cabin approximately three stories with glass windows facing south. The upper stories have balconies gazing out onto the lake and overlooking the front porch. It was one of many luxurious cabins along the private lake.

“You want me to light the car on fire?” you ask Nat after a few minutes and she seems to contemplate it for a second before muttering a No.

“So how was that night with Steve? We never really talked about it.” you ask

“He hasn’t really spoken to me about it either, I think he’s embarrassed, or awkward or both.” She says looking slightly hurt.

“I mean me and Bucky did kind of see his dick that night maybe that’s why he’s being so weird?” you offer.

“You guys saw it?” She exclaims.

“We didn’t mean too but you guys were half naked in the kitchen it just kinda happened!” you respond defensively.

“Ugh, remind me to never go clubbing with you again it leads to terrible choices!” she says burying her head in her hands.

“He was that bad hey?” you laugh

“Shut up, that’s not what I meant,” she says hitting your arm.

“I know I know, I mean he’s from the past so he’s probably just no use to the concept of sleeping with someone before marriage. So he was good then?” you ask, pressing her for details

“Oh ya he got the hang of what I wanted very quickly, and you’ve seen his dick..” she trails off before continuing. “What about you and Barnes can’t say I was convinced when you told me you hadn’t just fucked in the living room.”

“Nothing.” You say she gives you a side eye “Really! Some kids threw a glass bottle at him, well at me, he just got in the way. So I was cleaning him up.”

“Whatever you say.” She smirks. You let Nat take a nap for the rest of the watch knowing she had a long night ahead of her.

Steve relieves you around 1am and you return to the hotel shivering unable to feel your face. The only thing on your mind is getting in the shower and getting a few hours of sleep before you have to go back into the freezing temperatures. You bump into Bucky on your way in and ask where the rooms are. He leads you up to the third floor and he shows the two rooms, you and Nat were in one room with a single queen bed and Steve and Bucky were down the hall with two double beds.

“Hey no fair why do we have to share?” you ask, looking up at him.

“That’s what you get for taking first watch.” he replies snarkily.

“God you suck sometimes!” you say shoving past him into your room.

“I can do more than that if you want” he replies, leaning in the doorway.

“Get outta here Barnes” you say pushing him out of the room “I gotta shower i’m frozen!”

“Alright, well i’m just next door if you need anything” he says, grinning as you close the door in his face. You manage to get a few good hours of sleep before being woken up around 12pm by Nat starting the shower in your shared room.

Day 2

“How was the watch?” you ask her, letting out a yawn.

“Interesting.” She said with a slight blush forming on her cheeks

“Oh my god tell me!” you say throwing a pillow at her. She tells you how her and Steve had been really flirty, and that he had even given her his jacket to stay warm when he had noticed her shivering.

“So cute I may puke.” you respond, rubbing your eyes. “Anyways the boys stuck us with the shared bed.”

“Well, I say we do something about that,” she says, pulling Steve’s room key out of the jacket he had lent her. The two of you proceed to break into their room and move all their stuff out and all your stuff in.

“That’ll show them” you both high five before flopping down onto the beds and falling asleep. Your alarm goes off at midnight. You get up and dress yourself in your warmest clothes and head out to relieve Steve.

“Hey Steve, you're all done.” you say scooting out of the harsh cold of the morning and into the slightly less frigid car. The sun hadn’t risen yet making it a good 10 degrees cooler than when you had been there yesterday afternoon.

“Any movement?” you ask

“None so far.” Bucky responds “how rich was this?”

“God if zillionaires existed he was that for sure.” you say wrapping your arms around yourself to maintain body heat.

“So that’s how he kept you around so long.” he remarks.

“Well it wasn’t his kind and nurturing demeanour.” You state. It was too early for talking or thinking so you both sat there in silence staring at the cabin. After the first few hours you couldn’t feel your hands or feet or face. Using your lighter you make a small ball of fire in an attempt to warm yourself up but to no avail.

Bucky glances from his binoculars to you, back to the house then quickly back to you again realizing that you were looking colder by the second. With the watch not over for another 8 hours Bucky knew he had to do something.

“Look, this isn’t a move, but you're about 5 minutes away from becoming a human popsicle and seeing as I’m basically a human furnace…” he trails off realizing the confused look you were giving him. “Well what I’m saying is that I can keep you warm”

“I bet you say that to all the girls freezing to death.” you retort, staying in place feeling slightly stubborn and like you had to prove something to him. Or maybe it was because you didn’t want to get too close to him, afraid of how it might make you feel.

“Seriously,” he says, with a small chuckle “if you die I think Wanda and Nat will execute me”

“I’m fine” you mumble

“No you aren’t. Just come here” he says pulling you onto his lap with ease.

“Jesus you are warm.” you say as you curl up into him. He wraps his human arm around you knowing it’ll be warmer for you and uses the metal ones to hold up the binoculars. He feels your hands moving absentmindedly over his chest. He laughs “Are you feeling me up doll?”

“Well let’s just say I get why so many ladies love you.” you respond

“What? It isn't my shining personality?” he asks, almost offended.

“The only thing shining about you is your arm.” you say with a laugh.

You two stay like until you’ve warmed up enough to go back to your seat. You two wait until you reach the 48 hour mark before heading into the yard to set up the cameras and returning back to the hotel.

[skvaderarts]

Apocrypha Chapter Twenty Four: Discretion

Masterlist can be found Here! Thanks!

Chapter Twenty Four: Discretion

Notes: I’ve just gotta say, I LOVE the comments that I got on the last chapter! Jokes on YOU, I’m crying too! I just use humor to mask my pain like Dante because it’s my only coping method! I’m worried about V, too and I wrote this shit! *Cry laughing*. Oh I’m so sorry, V. Please forgive me!

(-~-)

The coming storm built up momentum as it coated the forest below in a heavy layer of fog and rain. The air cooled down considerably as the minutes ticked by, night settling in earnest across the region and somehow making it even more difficult to see. As he neared the edge of the clearing to make a timely rondevu with the rest of the team, Griffon couldn’t help but shake his head at the insanity unfolding before him. If he strained the reaches of his subconscious, he could swear that he could still hear Nero and Vergil protesting V’s proposal, the plan seemingly unfathomable to them. 

While the concept was sound, the actual execution of the plan depended upon variables that none of them could control. While Nero was a bit more flexible in terms of ideas presented to him, Vergil couldn’t claim anything of the sort. Minimizing dependence on outside factors was quite literally a way of life for him, and the idea that the lives of either of his sons could fall into that category practically made his blood boil. But V’s counter-argument had been difficult to turn down, especially with the prospect of being rid of the cult forever on the table. It all came down to Vergil’s willingness to tolerate a plan that he despised, but he agreed to do so against his better judgement. At the end of the day, this was the best overall method of thinning out the ranks and being free of this threat for the foreseeable future.

At least Vergil still got to cut down his enemies…

Griffon landed with a firm thud, shaking rain droplets off of the tree as he came to a stop before the rest of the group. Being the only one who was experienced with a weapon who they could afford to spare, Nico had volunteered to get everyone out of town and onto the train. She had her own undisclosed plans as to how she intended to accomplish this that she wasn’t disclosing, but that was her primary objective overall. The last two days had been a refreshing change of pace, but there was no way in hell they were staying in town with the potential things had for going catastrophically wrong. While the young mechanic doubted that the city would end up under a pile of ash and rubble like Redgrave City had, she still thought that it was a good idea to round up Patty, Kyrie, and the children and skip town. And it was an idea that the rest of the team wholeheartedly supported. Having bystanders in the line of fire was never a good policy, especially when those bystanders were family.

They were in unfamiliar territory, and fixing that as quickly as possible was a solid idea. As soon as Lady and Trish had returned from escorting Patty and Nico to the relative safety of the hotel, they would return to help back up the rest of the team. But for the moment, Griffon had the stage, and his audience was what remained of Sparda’s descendants. Well, at least those of them that were present.

“Oh boy, I don’t like anything about this plan.” The vibrant blue bird said as he shook his head, totally unsure as to how the situation he currently found himself in was going to pan out,” I got out of there just in time. That cult made off with V right after I left. I heard them say something about taking him back to their base. It has to be that cave, right?”

Dante shrugged, totally unsure as to what was going on. All he knew was that Nero had bolted back into the clearing at top speed with Vergil behind him and that his older twin looked less than pleased about whatever had happened back there. He’d stepped away for a moment to figure out where they had disappeared to, casually mentioning that he was going to figure out where they’d gone. But when Nero had returned with more than a few cuts and bruises, and V hadn’t returned at all, Dante knew that something was terribly wrong. 

Vergil was clearly on edge, despite the fact that he was doing an excellent job of hiding it from everyone around him. Well, everyone but Dante. The younger of the two knew his older twin’s mannerisms far too well for that to sway him. But at the same time, he couldn’t help but agree with the wiley bird’s assessment of the situation they currently found themselves in. The youngest Son of Sparda had precisely no idea what had happened back there and the same amount of input in the plan, but he knew that he was a part of it and he’d take the opportunity to rip Vergil a new one about it after V was safe. 

As much as he’d like to tell his frigid twin off for not explaining things to him, a part of him was actually happy that he knew he could depend on him to help him, even without asking him first. Even if Dante would have preferred that they discuss things beforehand, he was relieved to know that Vergil finally trusted him to some measurable degree. He’d been on the fence about it for a long time.

“So what’s the plan then?” Dante asked, looking over his twin pistols idly. He wasn’t so much checking their condition as he was trying to find something to do to occupy his wandering mind.” I mean, there is a plan, right?”

Griffon shrugged, flapping his wings. He was honestly just as lost as Dante was. “Your guess is as good as mine. V didn’t explain the fine details to me. He just sort of does things sometimes and I just go along with them. All he had to say was that “everything was going according to plan”. Cryptic little brat.”

Both Dante and Nero were willing to agree with that statement. Sometimes V really did do things that made them consider that fact that he might be slightly unhinged. Vergil folded his arms, clearly unamused with the entire situation. Did they really have time for pleasantries and small talk considering the situation?

“I assume he sent you to lead us back?” Vergil said as he stepped towards the edge of the woods. He didn’t strictly need the rest of them to come with him. He’d found the cave once, and he’d find it again. He had to.” That part of the forest is thick with dark magic and, as such, is incredibly difficult to navigate. Having an aerial view would be advantageous.”

Griffon nodded and took off towards the sky, double checking the trajectory they needed to follow. Vergil addressing him wasn’t something he was used to, and he got the distinct impression that Vergil was only doing so to further his own goals. Luckily for both of them, they were on the same wavelength in that regard. Everyone present wanted nothing more than to help facilitate V’s safe return and take down the cult that had seemingly developed an unhealthy fascination with him since his return from the underworld. If Griffon could help in some way, then they were glad for it. But how long could the blue bird stay away from his master?

“Well, let’s get out of here then. We can talk on the way, right?” Nero said as he followed after Vergil. “Wasting time here talking when we don’t know what they have planned isn’t going to get us anywhere or help V.” 

Dante returned his guns to the holsters and nodded in conformation. Nero made a good point. Their limbs and mouths worked in tandem. Why not use them that way? V was skilled at adjusting to difficult situations, but if the cult had magic and demons at their disposal, who knew what they could be capable of. The longer they spoke, the more Dante got the feeling that he understood the premise of the plan. And the less he liked some of the finer details of it. Giving the cult exactly what they were looking for was a good way to gain access to their domain, but to what end? How did that benefit them? After all, there was no way that Vergil and Nero would've accidentally left him behind. As he entered the forest behind them, Dante took one last look at the peaceful clearing behind them. He had to agree with Griffon. This particular mission had “bad news” written all over it.

(-~-)

Panic worry and calm vigilance melded into one tense atmosphere as everyone packed their bags in a blind rush in anticipation for the trip home. While they were shaving off almost an entire day from their trip, no one had the time to worry themselves with such trivial concerts and they rolled their belongings into messy tubes and tossed them into their suitcases. They could do this again somewhere else at a later date, but they had to live that long first. 

Lady and Trish watched the door to the room with a level of professionalism born of the kind of experience that came with a lifetime of fighting the denizens of the underworld. Under no circumstances were they going to let anything harm their companions, human or otherwise. While it was true that they didn’t tangle with humans very often and normally stuck to the more overtly demonic cases, they had been forced to take up arms against less demonic foes in the past. The only thing worse than fighting a crafty demon was fighting one that was backed by an intelligent human.

Hopefully this subsect of the cult wasn’t very smart.

“Look, Love, all you need to do is make it to the train station and head back to town. I’ll be there to back you up as soon as you arrive.” Magnolia said firmly from the other end of the phone. There was no questioning the honesty and seriousness from which her statement had been spawned.” I protect my own, and those cultists are going to rue the day they threatened you sweet girls. Stay safe until then!”

Nico nodded in agreement, not considering the fact that the older woman couldn’t see her from this end of the phone. She still had Magnolia’s number in her pocket from the card she’d given Nero before they had departed back to Fortuna with V. The young mechanic wasn’t entirely sure if she was stepping out of line by asking for help, and she didn’t care. Anything that kept the people she cares about safe was a win in her book, and she trusted Magnolia. All she could hope for was that they would arrive back in town safely and that the botanist didn’t have to reopen any existing injuries to save them. Nico didn’t know if she could live with any untimely deaths on her conscience, especially when it was someone who had shown her nothing but kindness. That, and Magnolia was basically Vergil’s only friend. Getting her killed was bound to have negative consequences.

“Don’t work about it, Magnolia. We're gonna leave here as soon as I get off the phone with ya. The train ride is only a couple of hours. Seeya then!” Nico said, trying her best to sound confident and sure of herself. She wasn’t lying, but she did have her reservations. She could practically feel Magnolia’s concerned smile through the phone as she wished her a safe trip and hung up, leaving Nico holding the receiver with nothing but the sound of the dial tone to keep her company. All she could do now was hope for the best and do what she could to help everyone get out of there safe. The gunsmith sighed and turned to the rest of the group, pleased to find that they were all packed and ready to head out. All she could do now was hope that the cultists didn’t know who they were.

“Is everyone ready to go?” Trish asked, giving the room a once over. Lady unfolded her arms and reached down to grab her luggage bag. She shared a similar sentiment. The trip had been fun, but she was ready to get the hell out of there and back to a more familiar place. At least she would have an advantage to use against her opponents back in Dante’s stomping grounds.

Everyone nodded or vocalized in agreement, trying their best to hide their uncertainty. The children were too little to comprehend the danger they were in, and to a certain degree, they were glad for that. The last thing anyone wanted was for the children to have another thing to keep them up at night.

“Yea, were good. Let’s get outta here! The train is gonna be here in like twenty minutes!” Nico said as she helped grab the bags and herd the children towards the door. Someone was going to have to pick Carlo up to keep him from lagging behind or wandering off in the commotion. She just hoped it would be someone else. She didn’t have a hand to spare.

“Okay then! You head down towards the lobby. Trish will lead the way and I’ll cover your backs. Let’s get out of here before they find us.” Lady stood out of the way and allowed Trish to leave the room, followed closely by Kyrie, Patty, Nico, and the children. Moving with a group this large was going to be a challenge.” Paying repair fees to the hotel is not going to be the thing that finally sends me into bankruptcy. Let’s get out of here in one piece, okay?”

As soon as the room was empty, Lady closed the door behind them and bolted after the rest of the group. The only straightforward path in the entire place was the route down to the lobby. If they could make it down there and out of the building, all they had to do was go a handful of blocks up the street. Then they were home free. And she was going to make sure they got there in one piece. She’d never be able to face Nero again if something happened to Kyrie or the kids, and Dante would literally go to hell and back for Patty. She couldn’t let her family down.

(-~-)

“Why are there always so many people willing to jump at the opportunity to join some sort of sinister death cult?!” Nero said as he kicked one of the cultists in the chest, knocking them off the side of the cliff they were facing towards. They wouldn’t need to worry about that guy anymore. “Like, where do all these idiots keep coming from?! Is there a super villain lackey shop or something?!”

“Because it is the nature of humans to seek power beyond their current threshold, and they latch onto those that promise to deliver that to them.” Vergil said as he came to a stop, sheathing Yamato. Half a dozen cultists that he had taken off guard toppled over in a very upsetting way, clearly no longer a factor in the current battle. “All one must do to gain the trust of another is promise them something they do not currently possess that they seek to acquire, and many will see that as enough justification to commit unspeakable atrocities.”

Nero raised an eyebrow, giving Vergil a sideways look before turning to face Dante. “Care to translate, Dante? Your brother is speaking another language again!” 

The youngest Son of Sparda had just finished off his opponent’s summon and was pursuing them. The hooded man was spouting some indecipherable nonsense about something he didn’t care to understand and throwing everything between them at the red coat wearing devil hunter in an attempt to slow his approach. In a way, Dante pitied them. They seemed to be clearly out of their minds, the presence of so much demonic power and the toll of summoning so many demons with so little training had clearly robbed them of their humanity and their sentience. All that was left of them were the shells of what had once been people. But now they were twisted beyond recognition. Despite the fact that they were human, they were more akin to a demon than any pure blooded human should be. He’s seen powerful pure blood demons that could easily pass as more human than these poor husks pretending to be living beings. No. They were like worker ants, more akin to the Empusa than anything from the human world that wasn’t an insect ought to be. And he needed to find out who the leader of the hive was and give them a heavy dose of insect repellent.

Whoever was in charge of this cult needed to be stopped before any more lives were ruined.

“You think I know? I wasn’t really listening! Nothing Vergils says makes sense to me.” Dante said as he closed in on the cultist and finished him off quickly. No need to drag things out. His life had clearly been filled with enough suffering. No need to rub salt in his wounds.” Something about how it’s easy to deceive despirate people into doing stupid things for you, if I was going to make an educated guess. Why don’t you ask him?”

Vergil finished off the last of the demons, grabbing one of the cultists around the collar and slamming him into a nearby tree with enough force to shatter both him and the sturdy oak in two. They groaned and shook their head, clearly dazed.

“You're going to tell me where the rest of your ilk took him, or things will not end well for you.” Vergil said sternly, making eye contact with the young man in the hood.” My companions are patent. I am much less so. Do not test me.”

The younger man stared at him, clearly intimidated. “ B-but Agreus will kill me if he finds out I said anything! I can’t!”

”Yes, I’m quite sure he will. That is not my problem. You should’ve put more care into who you trusted in the first place.” Vergil gave him a sideways glance, allowing a hint of his demonic power to manifest in the form of his eyes flashing an eerie red for a moment.” But I am here now, and while he might kill you, I assure you that if any harm should come to my son, you will wish that was all I did. There are worse fates. Trust me.”

A visible look of horrified shock crossed the cultist as his blood ran ice cold. It was evident to anyone that could see him that he took Vergil’s threat to heart. With a sigh, he raised a shaky hand and pointed in the direction of the cave, barely hiding his worry. In that moment, he was more afraid of Vergil than he had been of anything in his entire short life. Not only was he sure that the Darkslayer could kill him, he knew that he wouldn’t hesitate to do so.

“Follow that p-path towards the interior of the cave. The part you can see here is only the mouth of a greater cavern that stretches several miles under the forest. At the end of the left fork is the cave you're looking for. You can’t miss it! They took him that way, I swear! Something about Master Agreus wanting to understand “what the dark lord saw in him”. I don’t think they plan to kill him, though. No. Master Agreus might be our leader, but he answers to a much higher power. A terrifying power. And that power is what is after that kid. We just do what they tell us to. I’m sorry, I didn’t know they would do something like this. I didn’t sign up to kidnap people! None of us did.”

Vergil yanked the younger man away from the tree and forced him in the direction of the woods before releasing him with a forceful shove. The younger man glanced at him for a moment, wrapped in confusion as the Darkslayer allowed Yamato’s blade to peak out of its scabbard. “Leave before I come to my senses.”

“Your… not going to kill me?” The older teen asked, clearly shocked by his decision. If he had been in Vergil’s place, he wasn’t sure what he would’ve done to the man who had helped kidnap his child.” What if I’m lying.”

“Then you're a fool and you should spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder for me. Now go before I bathe my blade in your blood and leave your corpse here for the wolves.” Vergil said, far beyond the limit of his patience. Was this foolish boy actually going to stand there and look a gift horse in the mouth? Humans were truly something else…

“T-thank you! I hope you find him.” The young man said as he took off running in the direction of the forest. Vergil doubted his ability to navigate in the vast darkness, but he’d made his way out there so there was no way of knowing. Regardless, he was no longer the eldest Son of Sparda’s problem. As the young man disappeared into the darkness, Vergil turned in the direction of the cave and his two companions, both of which seemed genuinely surprised at his decision. Vergil half groaned and passed them, heading into the cave. Dante and Nero shared a glance at one another before following him.

“So Vergil, why didn’t you…” Dante started, unsure of how to approach the topic in a way that wouldn’t reignite his twin’s barely contained blood lust. It seemed that his older brother possessed more restraint than he gave him credit for.

Vergil stopped for a moment, glancing over his shoulder at Nero. While his response was a result of Dante’s inquiry, his response was meant more for his youngest son than his twin brother. “... I don’t kill children, Dante. I see no need to elaborate further.”

With that, Vergil continued towards their objective. It had been entirely too long since they had heard from Griffon, and Vergil was admittedly concerned for what that might mean for his oldest child. Hindsight is twenty-twenty, and as such, Vergil loathed the fact that he had agreed to go along with this foolish plan. But he felt the need to allow Nero and V to prove that they were as capable as he believed them to be. After all, they were descendants of Sparda and they had worked together to bring him down in Redgrave City. Not just anyone was capable of doing something like that.

He just hoped they would all survive long enough to regret what they had done.

(-~-)

Oh, the last two three chapters have been a blast to write! This is the kind of melodramatic shit I live for! Thank you so much for reading this chapter and have an awesome day! I’m thrilled that you’ve all stuck around this long. Thanks for all the love!

[focusfixated]

february fic rec round-up

month #02: february - good omens, it, the goldfinch, little women, maurice

(please feel free to reblog)

---

jesus died for somebody’s sins (but not mine) by @lavellington

rating: G

fandom & pairing: good omens - aziraphale/crowley

summary: 'So you're going to start, what – praying?' 

'I already pray,' Aziraphale says, primly. 'I am an angel.'

'Yes, but it's different, what you do,' Crowley says, impatiently. 'It's not all sitting around trying to decipher mistranslated Hebrew, and searching for the Virgin Mary in your tea leaves. You're on the staff!'

notes: sharply beautiful, and a whole-ass queer mood in terms of the idea of awakening, of being able to fully occupy your own self and identity. there is a really lovely thing here of aziraphale finding a new, human way to express his faith and understanding of what god means to him, and it's explored in a way that is both incisive and uplifting. very well-observed, in terms of character, and crafted with such a light touch when it comes to the pace and wit of the dialogue. a joy to read the whole way through.

---

not exactly where i need to be (and yet it seems so close) by varnes

rating: M

fandom & pairing: IT - richie/eddie

summary: Richie runs all the way to Eddie’s. He has a bike but he can’t remember, just now, where he put it. Everything feels real, feels — the gravel hurt his shoeless feet, his lungs burn when he gets tired, there’s a cut on his chin that aches a little. It feels real but things always felt real, with It. You can’t trust how you feel or what you see. That’s the core of the terror of It. That everything is real and nothing is real and all of it can kill you.

notes: a subtle and thoughtful look at how your outlook changes over time, how your life shifts as you grow up, at the ways you can still make a difference. this is such a strong concept, and a masterful execution of a complicated, dimension-hopping story. full of world-building details and wonderfully in-depth character study. cathartic and emotional and beautifully written. 

---

24-pack card and sticker valentine kits by @stitchyblogs

rating: M

fandom & pairing: IT - richie/eddie

summary: Eddie grabs a bottle of Elmer’s and starts tracing each letter with glue. There’s a dopey, sort of proud feeling in Richie, watching him carefully craft the letters of his name. He could of picked Bill or Stanley, gnashing away on the other side of the table with their pinking shears, or the teacher - but he picked Richie. 

notes: structured as a series of valentines from 1984 to 2019, this is such a neat way of telling a story. a brilliant set of snapshots of richie's life, his trials and emotions, the absolutely compelling highs and lows. each segment is coloured by wonderful background details, sharply-observed, and the dialogue flows at such a pace, it sparkles with this characterful wit that is an absolute DELIGHT to read. 

---

feet on the ground, head in the sky by @suzybishops

rating: T

fandom & pairing: IT - richie/eddie

summary: richie and eddie put themselves back together, one long-distance phone call at a time.

notes: just a really lovely story of someone putting in the work to get better. taking the time to heal. learning how to be themselves again. captures the essence of fear and self-doubt - specifically, how richie feels about his writing, and about his potential lack of talent in the aftermath of any magically-boosted success - and leads us on a slow, soft walk towards renewal and acceptance.

---

a renaissance, another day by @tiny-steve

rating: E

fandom & pairing: the goldfinch - boris/theo

summary: Two years after Amsterdam Boris shows up on Theo’s doorstep in New York and he hasn’t had a hit in twenty-four hours.

notes: this is just INCREDIBLE. a deeply-felt, keenly-observed, brilliantly-constructed bit of storytelling. uses gorgeous imagery that is dramatic and sordid and beautifully-drawn, showing us the horror-show of drug withdrawal in a terribly visceral, awful way, but which also clears a path for something that gives us hope for the future, in a story that is otherwise characterised by its trauma. a brilliant end-piece to where the novel left off.

---

the home front by kindkit

rating: G

fandom & pairing: maurice - background maurice/scudder

summary: Alec Scudder and Clive Durham meet again in 1915.

notes: so neatly-conceived and executed. a lovely character study of scudder, full of warm, bright details of the world around him. a really gladdening thing to read and to imagine that, amongst the turmoil, the strength of this connection survives.

---

all this practice and still no grace by @drawsaurus

rating: E

fandom & pairing: little women - jo/laurie

summary: Laurie would have taken any humiliation, tenfold worse than this, to be as close to Jo as he was allowed now.

notes: a fascinating look at the gender-play between jo and laurie, the way they form their roles in opposition to each other. this is such a brilliant dynamic to play with, and is done in a really neat, sharp way, vividly-painted with economic and precise language. this is a look at people who are unsure of themselves, and the way they feel their way through something unfamiliar in an attempt to gain the freedom to get what they want. such a good read. 

---

previously:

month #01: january

[nightmare-circus]

Serica | Reaction 4/4 | Ode to…

When: Second motive, when their surroundings were not these ephemeral islands but a quiet village. In the midst of suffocating fear, after she had committed to holing up in her room, before he had come to stay with her.

Where: On their mirrors. Due to aforementioned self-isolation.

Who: One conspiracy theorist, one nurse. Just friends, for now.

What:

( > seriously though i dont want to find you dead )

> then don’t go looking

( > how could i not? )

Why:

IX. Yamamoto, Deacon

Was it her fault, for trying to make concrete plans for the future?

( “Deacon Yamamoto, I will do everything in my power to make sure you and I can leave here, that I will find you and bring you home and we’ll spend days just sitting on the couch watching terrible sitcoms, riding on the subway gossiping about tourists, walking through the park hand in hand…“ )

No, that was stupid. 

Serica may have been a woman who believed in more than the average person, trusted in platitudes and jinxes where others would scoff, but even in the midst of the unthinkable she was dimly aware this wasn’t her fault. It wasn’t his fault. It was…. someone else. Someone else’s fault.

A someone else who she needed to find. But, she found herself once again incapable of meaningfully investigating. Not this time for exaggerated pain and weakness, but of a pure inability to move forward both physically and psychologically.

She’s done this before. She had just forced herself to shallowly rationalize and pack away the deaths of Miles, Juniper, Tatsuya, Elise. One more couldn’t be bad. She was great at compartmentalization wasn’t she? She was able to laugh and have drinks hours after poisoning a man, she was able to pretend to be a victim when only half an hour before she had killed one Danny Ostergard with her two hands. If she approached this from a distance, with the veneer of a woman who had nothing to do with the dead man before her, with the objectivity of a woman who simply was trying to figure out what was going on… she could do this, right?

Let’s begin.

How does she even begin to explain Deacon Yamamoto?

(Ah… he’d probably like that reference, wouldn’t he?)

u/BoysBBUGS ||  u/aviary23

Head mod of Fanatical Ravings of the Disappeared, he(?) had a lot of theories that she didn’t necessarily subscribe to, but saw his contributions interesting to pick at. Ships passing through the night on the world wide web ocean.

IX. The Hermit || XI. Justice

A neighbor of a neighbor, though she hadn’t seen him around much. Does he keep to himself? Why the mask?

Cockroach & Serica

A riot of a man, able to make her laugh to hysterics at their first meeting. Supposedly 32 years old, supposedly unable to bath for fear of chemicals, supposedly with child with a man he had just met. Willing to have himself come off as incredibly unreasonable in public. Despite all this, clearly intelligent, clearly possessed a mind that had a voracious appetite for information and was wonderful to bounce theories on. An asset, despite it all.

( “I’m Serica by the way!” )

[…]

“They gave me the name Cockroach. Fucking COCKROACH Ser. What kinda joke is this shit?”

“I have a dumb fucking gift and Cockroach might as well be my real name since I doubt I’ll ever hear my original one ever again.”

Roach & Riccy

Slippery in every way, but not so unreasonable as he seemed. Logic was a great way to combat him, and any answer often had to be weaseled with either heavy theorizing (her specialty) or with a tango with some off the cuff roleplaying (decidedly not her specialty). She wouldn’t be so cocky to say that he changed his habits for her but… she thinks she had a hand in convincing him. He really wasn’t so bad, if you gave him a chance, and he’d surprised her more than once with acts of care and thoughtfulness.

Dee & ██

A friend for sure, and one who seemed to have a genuine loyalty. No qualms at seeing her drop a stun gun in front of him, no reservations when she admitted tentatively that she slept with a knife, no judgements when she casually brought up murder once more. Morals in the traditional sense didn’t seem to shackle him, which was very convenient to incorporating him into her tentative plans. 26, not 32. A New Yorker, as well though rather than any borough, his car was his home. Given his life he had become a stranger to hugs, to positive affection, but once he had a taste he was hungry for more. For all his mock lovers and public swooning, he was dense to actual subtle flirting.

( “My middle name. Aka, no risk of harming me if a faelien hears it. ██.” )

“I don’t have a middle name. I’d tell you if I did, swear. You can call me Dee though. It’s a part of my first name and you already know the first letter of it when I fucked up that one time. So Dee is a pretty good substitute then, yeah?”

Deacon & ███

Incredibly cute. A true newcomer to being hit on, to being told he’s handsome, to being kissed, to being in a relationship. A strong backbone even as she herself wavered in the days leading up to the decisive moment. Determined, stating possibilities as if they were facts and refusing to acknowledge her agonizing over the worst case scenario. Through everything, an unwavering support, a hand on her back, a shoulder to lean on. A good singer of lullabies, in her opinion.

( “███. My name is ███.” )

“Deacon.”

Deacon Yamamoto & ███ ██ █

Did not hold himself in the same concern he showed her. Makes a fuss in the public chat about the wrongs done to him but brushes off the severity when questioned by his own girlfriend. Still a liar, still a master of faking a smile. 

( “I won’t remember much but i’ll know your name, your, that you helped me so much in escaping that, that you mean the World to me–” she’s just babbling “I probably will believe myself if, if I actually try to find your information or maybe your drivers license– maybe if I put you in as a missing person or– But oh no will you believe me? What if I just show up at your car and you just think I’m a scam artist or–” )

“My license plate is HGO789. Deacon Yamamoto. I’ll believe you. I’ll always believe you.”

( “…█. My last name is… █.” )

███ ██ █

There once was a man upon whom was foisted a change. Upon his rise to a breathing dream, he was stripped of his taste and stripped of subsequent limits. Immune not only to the aches of poison but the salve of saccharin, the burn of capsaicin. To match with his steel stomach was his mercurial tongue, not gifted but cultivated carefully. Silvery and poisonous with every other word, it was at the command of a mind that paralleled in fluidity. It was as if he was a maestro, and his instrument of choice was a dictionary, phrases and scenarios slung with such rapidity that all who listened were on guard for constant whiplash.

So, it meant something when words became actions.

Anyone can say anything. He especially was able to say anything, a master class perjurer of the highest degree. The sun was about to peek through the sky at any moment, he was a Staten Island woman in an unhappy marriage trying to hook up her hair dresser with her son, he was fine, he was going to be okay, he was going to get out of here–

…

There is a difference, between telling someone that you will take consideration for the situation, and spending precious currency to fit yourself with a weapon.

There is a difference, between telling someone that you will help them, protect them, and taking the extra mile to pull down the mattress of a woman who’s waking hell of a gift would not let her climb up the steps otherwise.

There is a difference, between telling someone that you want them to live and helping them plan and execute the death of another person.

There is a difference, between telling someone that you want to live and…

…

(She was failing miserably in this task).

…

No one who looked at his body, at the stagnant ichor dripping out of his head, could understand the potential for warmth like she would. His fingers combing through her hair, pulling out loose tangles and tucking locks behind her ear so she could look at him unfettered. A grin, not sharp and pulled taught, but gently reassuring, murmuring soothing phrases to ease her anxious hands. Irises, bright not with the promise of information to unravel but with unbridled emotion that made his eyes crinkle, a devoted gaze meant for one.

One person, who stood here alone.

“And it’s not like I need it, yanno? I kinda wasted my life away before all of this. Not sure if I want it back.”

"I won’t die. Not yet at least. I have some things that need getting done." 

“I mean I’m not gonna let myself die after I break a leg like some racehorse. I wanna be useful, not a damn trigger happy martyr. ” He had snorted. “I’ll still make a valiant effort to get out of here Rics. But if it comes down to me and you? Well.” He had shrugged. “As a consolation prize I will say, you do make me wanna become someone worth living again.”

"I was impliiiied my dear, of course I’m making it out of here with you. What would the point be otherwise. I was trying to make it seem all badass and broody, adding a technicality to it all would’ve been underwhelming.”

“You’re going to be stuck with me until the end of times.”

“You’re getting out of- we’re getting out of here. You were wonderful.”

“Yes I know. I will. I’m going to get out. With you.”

“Of course, █. We can live a life worth living together out there.”

“It’s going to be alright █.”

“I love you █, please. Trust me, things are gonna be fine.”

“One day at a time.”

One day at a time, she had repeated.

One day at a time, she repeats, staring at his face, flesh frozen in the way that only a cadaver could. She’d never forget the first time she had touched a dead body, and was forced to confront the jarring dissonance, the coldness, the stiffness, the pallor of the skin that had been warm, soft, pliable, just hours before. Only a child, forced to confront the concept of lives ending for the first time. Since then she had seen more than her fair share, from work, from this place, before her very eyes.

Joints creak and echo through her body as she moves, finally. To fold her knees under herself, sit at his side, hand hovering indefinitely, torn between not having to face that final moment of confirmation and wanting to just hold him once more. Before she would have to be torn from him for hours, before they returned from a useless trial and his body would be gone, before she’d have to trudge to their caravan, who’s emptiness would threaten to collapse on her.

“There is nothing worse than not knowing.”

( “No, there’s nothing worse than not living.” )