#I love that usually in settings like this the human fighter is the Normal Guy

[waitineedaname]

What is dungeon meshi btw? It looks cool and I assume it's a manga but other than that I draw a blank

it is in fact a cool manga!! Dungeon Meshi (also translated as Delicious In Dungeon) is a high fantasy manga where the premise is that this party of adventurers is trying to rescue their partymember's sister from a dragon, but because they have limited money and supplies, they have to resort to eating monsters. The chapters are a wonderful blend of fantasy action and lovingly constructed recipes. Seriously, they'll go through each of the steps of a recipe, and then have beautiful meals at the end

I've never had a manga make me so hungry

The art is gorgeous, the characters are compelling (I adore every single main character), it genuinely has some of the most creative fantasy worldbuilding I've seen in a while, and also the plot gets fucking nuts. It's about the importance of taking care of your body and eating well and resting and supporting each other, and it's also about going absolutely insane, driven mad by your desires. It rocks. You can read it here.

As a treat, here are some of my favorite panels

[the-illiterate-pirate]

4k words of drunk Anasui baby!!!! I don't have much to say so let's get in to it

I'm trying something different. What do y'all think about the header? Looks good, yeah, yeah??

Dancing with a Stranger

Notes: SFW, hurt/comfort?, starts off a little sad, a lot of talk about Anasui feeling like the gang does care about him :(, fem!reader, drinking, needy Ana, literally sleeping with a stranger, dw you take good care of him and you get breakfast, this is less romantic pairing and more you playing babysitter

Btw dividers used below are not mine, credit goes to @/cafekitsune, big fan of their work!

It was happening again. Anasui could feel the atmosphere change around him at the drop of a drink. All at once the noise of that dingy bar he was in became so hard to ignore. Who knew that such a tiny building could hold so much noise.

They were supposed to be there together, drinking away the week's stress from work, studies, and tests. And Anasui had the pleasure to watch the only four people he cared about leave, two at a time. Jolyne was getting hyper. By the time Hermes was able to wrestle her out the door she had her knee on a neighboring table, trying to pick a fight with a guy twice her size that she deemed was too loud. Hermes had apologized, leaving both their half of the bill while she took Jolyne to their car.

Following a little after, Foo Fighters needed to be taken home, too. Always the lightweight. They were never good at holding their alcohol. Their face was about the same shade of green as their hair by the time Weather decided to drive them home.

And that left Anasui, rotting, left alone with nothing but his thoughts. Something he didn't like. He was sure he heard Weather speak softly to him. A gentle, "will you be okay by yourself?" Anasui wasn't sure if he responded coherently. Or if he just kept staring at the peeling booth in front of him, realization of what was happening slowly starting to sink in.

And the bar became too loud. His little bubble of security was popped, being flooded by all of those negative thoughts and ideas once again like a punctured submarine. And there Anasui sat, in a far off corner of the building in a booth seat alone, with only his iced down liquor to console him. He loved his friends, he loved them deeply, even more than his own self. But he hated the feelings they left him with to fight alone. A dark, deep set hunger he wasn't sure how to satisfy. A painful panging in his chest for something more. It made it all the more tempting to find something to feed his humiliating ticks.

He was alone now, depressive thoughts slowly circling and constricting his alcohol ladened mind, like how his finger followed the rim of his glass. Tonight was the last day he had to enjoy his time with friends. By the time the sun rose tomorrow morning, the girls would all be busy with school, whereas Weather Report and Foo Fighters would go on with work. Leaving him to drown in more school work with other idiots who classified him as a human garbage fire. It'd be another seven days until he could wrap himself in the embrace of his friends once more and forget everything for a short while. But now, he was left to shiver in the cold leather booth that stuck to his bare skin.

Anasui decided one more drink wouldn't hurt. Or two. Maybe three.

           

               

You weren't Anasui's original target. Simply put you were stuck in the crossfire between him and a friend, playing shield to a man cowering under the woman's menacing fist.

You just got out of the bathroom.

"It is way too late for this." You exhaled noisily. After pinching the bridge of your nose you took a once over of your damsel in distress. He looked familiar, and pathetic, as the only regular you knew that wore so much fishnet, plus the hot pink hair was a dead giveaway. Normally you'd see him every Saturday night in a group of five. Your friends usually left before they did, but tonight flew a little south. One of your girlfriends was hitting a lucky streak with the pretty bartender, it took an extra hour for her to seduce them into giving her free drinks and a ride home. That left you, two drunks to babysit, and the other designated driver. Oh, and the koala glued to your back.

"What did he even do?"

"Asshole tried to grope me!" Helena shouted, pointing an accusing finger at behind your back. "Called me by some other chick's name and threw himself at me! Do you know this guy?!"

"Hela, don't you think it's obvious this guy is drunk? He must've thought you were someone else!" You were already over this. But no one was going home until everything was settled.

Come to think of it, you have seen this guy with a girl before. Black locks, tan skin. From a distance, you could see where he was coming from. Being drunk probably didn't help either. "Huh. You kinda do look like her." You confirmed with a tilt of your head, eyeing her hair.

"Yer agreeing with this dick?! So you do know him!" You groaned in frustration.

Helena wasn't going to quit without an apology. That was how she rolled. You really needed to quit giving the angry drunk liquor... Or keep her confined to her apartment.

Luckily for you Stacy was there to calm her down. After a painfully slurred apology from the man in mesh, it was deemed good enough. Although barely. Helana's designated driver hauled her out to the car, you and your other friend following outside. She was still sipping away on a bright blue fruity drink, watching the show in the car go down.

You looked between her and your new "friend".  Definitely not fit to stay here by himself. Now he was leaning on you for support, swaying on his feet, shivering. Jeez, curse your bleeding heart. You couldn't leave him like this.

Roxanne felt your gaze, slurping down the final gulp of her drink before turning to you. "What are you thinking 'bout, baby driver?"

You took a deep breath. "Rox, I know this is gonna sound crazy, but would you mind staying with Stacy and Hela tonight? I wanna stick around and help this oaf."

"Oooohh," Roxanne wiggled her eyebrows, slurping down the nothing in her cup and making an annoying noise. "I can do it, but I didn't think you were the type to pick up boys at a place like this."

"Not a chance. I just wanna help this guy get home."

"Suuure," Her bright blue eyes rolled back in her head. She dropped the glass at the door of the bar, before sauntering to the car with her other two friends acting giggly. Stacy didn't seem to mind. the five of you were always sleeping over at each other's abodes. Most of the time it was to your house because you were the only one that didn't have to worry about neighbors. You had already finished college, found a great job and made the big bucks. You were the team's honorary sugar momma.

Speaking of... You didn't think you saw any of them pay for the tab. Damnit. That left you to do it.

"Those..."

You waved your friends goodbye, a pleasant but forced smile on your lips while Roxanne waved back, riding off back to Helena and Stacy's campus.

"Bitches." You finished strong once their car disappeared. You sighed.. Whatever, you'll get back at them. Somehow.

From behind you, the drunk hiccuped, taking you out of your revenge fantasies. He was nuzzled into your collar, appreciating the feel of your shirt. It would've been cute, if he was. I don't know. A child.

Wait. Right. Finding this guy's owners.

"Okay man, let's find your friends." You huddled back into the bar, first paying off your friend's tab, second scanning the tables and the booths for any faces that wrung any bells.

"Hey. Hey, pinky. Where did you and your friend's sit?" It was worth a shot. Luckily, it worked, the guy pointed a weak finger at the corner of the room with a booth. But the booth was empty, already cleaned, no glasses or plates or anything.

"What the..?" You turned around, lightly gripping his shoulders to make him look you in the eye. "Hey, listen. What's up? Did your friends already leave, or-?"

"They left." He confirmed with a sniffle. "They left already. Without me. I'm...."

Like it finally hit him what happened, he froze. Tears began to show in his eyes as he gripped tighter on to your cardigan. "I'm all alone."

"Oh! Oh, jeez, okay," He practically threw himself at you, silently shaking. His sighs vibrated against your neck as he tried to find his breath. "I don't wanna be alone anymore. Please... Please don't leave me..."

No. Were you actually thinking about taking this stranger to your house? What were the odds that this guy was some insane murderer, and this was all some elaborate plan? Looking down at him right now, he didn't seem vicious. Just very, very... sad. He was acting like a lost puppy.

God. You were actually going through with this.

Tab paid. Dog man in toe. You walked back outside to your car. You had his arm slung around your shoulder to lead him to the vehicle faster. He was still mumbling incoherently, but at least he wasn't crying anymore. You weren't sure your poor heart could handle it. "Hey, real quick, can you tell me your name?"

You finally got him into the passenger seat. Immediately he curled himself into a little ball, shivering from the surprisingly cool summer air. Then again, he was only wearing mesh, that was probably why. "It's Anasui." You heard him whisper, huddling closer. You paused, before shouldering off your cardigan, throwing it over his arms. You gave him your name.

"Listen Anasui. I'm taking you to my house. After you get some sleep and sober up I can take you back to your place. Does that sound okay?" You paused again, then added softly, "I'm not gonna leave you alone tonight, alright?"

He sniffled. "Alright."

Great.

Then you were off. The drive home was a  little uncomfortable. The silence was deafening, and there wasn't anything good on the radio this late at night. 

"Damnit..." You gave up, staying on a station playing early 2000's hits with the volume on low. Not exactly your cup of tea, but Anasui seemed to take interest in it. You didn't know what song was playing. It was some sort of pop, but on the slower side. Anasui sounded like he knew the song by heart. He mouthed gibberish into his headrest, eyes closed, fingers lightly tapping the beat. It was kind of sweet, even if you couldn't understand a word he was saying. But the thought immediately turned sour as you were reminded that this Anasui guy was just drunk, and you'd just found him alone at a bar. "Tch, I can't believe your friends would just abandon you like that." You remark offhandedly, not expecting any response. You're surprised when you do get one.

"They didn't leave me drunk." Anasui sighed, burrowing his face deeper into the fabric of his seat. "Leas' I was sober when they left."

"So why did you start to drink more? Why not leave? That's so..." You didn't want to scold a grown man. "...That sounds very irresponsible."

"I know." He mourns. "I was'n thinkin'. I'm so stupid."

You've finally stopped the car in the driveway up to your house. It was a nice house. You were proud of it. Anasui seemed to think so, too. You get out, swiftly making it over to his side and opening his car door. "You're not stupid," You assured him, waiting for the man bundled in cotton to unbuckle his seatbelt. "Some people just make some bad decisions. Look at me and you, we're still young, it's bound to happen."

Anasui was able to get out without help, still clutching to your cardigan like a lifeline. The same couldn't be said for the walk up to your porch. "Besides. Sometimes we just need some help getting through a rough patch. I can't blame you for that."

You unlock the front door. The house was deep black inside. You didn't think to leave any lights on. Not that it mattered, your eyes had already adapted to the night, Anasui behind you would probably get sick if you turned them on now. And you knew your house like the back of your hand.

Unfortunately. Anasui didn't.

"Ow!"

"Sorry! The door leads to the dining room. Just follow behind me, I'll try not to let you bump into anything else." Try was the key word.

You praised your past self for choosing the room on the bottom floor as your own. Upstairs was the guest room, and you didn't feel like lugging Mr. Tipsy up the stairs. He would be okay in yours for a night.

You liked your room a whole lot. Maybe you splurged a little more than you should have after you moved in, but your teen self would've been so happy. And the best part? Dimmer switch.

The room was illuminated by the warm lights in the ceiling, but only the softest glow that allowed you to see under your feet and the scattered posters on the farthest wall. You deposited Anasui on your bed, before moving to your dresser, pushing past your favorite shirts and others you couldn't remember wearing in the past year. You seriously needed to throw them out. But for sentimentalities sake, you couldn't bring yourself to.

A white shirt caught your attention. An old, extra large Van Halen shirt you got for your last birthday as a last ditch attempt for a gift, with the "Panama" cherub on the front with his cigarettes. You liked it enough, even if it was a little big. You just needed something that could fit the redhead on your bed, because surely those fishnets were not comfortable at all.

He looked about ready to conk out, as he was barely holding on by the time you came back. The cardigan was placed delicately to the side as he swayed in place. Looking very, very sleepy. "Here's this. You don't need to strip if you don't want to, but I thought you'd appreciate it better than that mesh crap." You offered him the shirt, explaining the deal. You weren't even halfway through with your last sentence before Anasui began to peel off his skimpy outfit and his hat-thing, you watched in a mixture of shock and impress at how easy it was, to both strip with an audience, and just in general. You weren't sure if you could've pulled it off so easily.

"...Right. I'll be back, I'm just gonna get you some makeup wipes real quick," You had to peel your eyes away from his physique. He was godly. He was able to keep that lean figure without sacrificing the muscles, incredible!

But no! You mustn't let your mind wander. Anasui was drunk and sad, the last thing he needed was some stranger ogling his muscles.

You found those makeup wipes, along with some Advil and two sips of water for you and your new friend. This whole fiasco as well as the headache from babysitting Helena and Roxxy wasn't helping you focus.

When you got back, Anasui's mesh was at the foot of his bed, with him huddled underneath your thick and very pale comforter. Two totally different alarms started buzzing in your head. The one warning you of expensive makeup staining your sheets, another making the painfully clear observation of the skirt and go-go boots next to Anasui's outfit. His lower half was underneath the covers, you prayed he was wearing something underneath.

"H-Hey! You aren't off the hook yet, sit up so I can clean your face!" Anasui complained with an outraged moan, but he got up anyway. He took his medicine while you prepared the wipes for his face.

You took him into a gentle hold under his chin, beginning at the mascara that stained his pretty cheeks. The way he held eye contact the whole time unnerved you slightly, put you powered on, tossing the old wipe to the side to get a new one for his lips. The lipstick stained his mouth a pretty shade of pink. You leaned back to get a good look at your work. He looked a lot better without the makeup, his natural beauty taking you by surprise. Maybe the dim lights wouldn't see you blush. Hopefully.

There was a light pause. This time, it was Anasui getting embarrassed by the attention. He looked to his lap, and the hands he rested there.

"Do.... Do you think my friends hate me?"

You tossed the used wipes away, looking back at the man to answer truthfully. "I don't think they do." You moved back to the bed, "But, I do think they don't understand what's going on in that head of yours. I don't think they knew leaving you alone was gonna do... this to you."

You were interrupted by Anasui propping his head on your stomach. He was affectionate like a cat, hands wrapping around your waist. Subconsciously your hand went up to brush through his hair. Tonight was full of firsts, why stop now.

"You should try to talk to them about it, I'm sure they'll understand."

"And what if I was right, and they leave me if I told them?" It felt weird to have him talk against your stomach.

"Then they aren't real friends, are they? Anyway, I'm sure that's just your head lying to you." You couldn't get over how insane his hair was. It was silky soft, without any tangles. You were adult enough to admit you were jealous. "And on the tiniest, minute off chance I'm wrong, you could hang out with me and the girls! I promise Helena is super cool when we aren't out drinking." He didn't talk back immediately, and instead of agreeing he asked, "You're not leaving, are you?"

"Well, I was expecting to sleep upstairs and give you your privacy," You sighed, beginning to think that was just wishful thinking. Anasui finally looked up at you, violet irises sparkling like puppy eyes. "Stay here with me, please?" You echoed back the same groan he made previously, but you guess deep down, you really didn't mind. You just wanted the guy to feel better. Plus, you were tired, and ready to have this night end. "Fine. Just let me change in the bathroom quick, then I'll get in bed."

By the time you got out again, he was already dozing off in the covers. Again, you were envious of his skill to fall asleep so quickly.

You got an extra cover, not chancing sharing one with him, whether he was half naked or just a blanket hog. The room was extra cold, so you made sure to get a big one. You could finally get into bed, your sore muscles immediately relaxing into the mattress. In the blink of an eye, Anasui sensed the new presence, quickly sliding over to mooch off of your body heat. You've officially given up, allowing him to stay close. He smelled good, at least, and it felt nice to cuddle. Maybe it was wrong to admit to liking sharing your bed with a stranger, but you couldn't say no to Ana. Maybe in the near future he wouldn't be a stranger, maybe this didn't need to be a one time thing. You weren't in love with this guy, not by a long shot. He was emotional and clingy. But maybe you could grow to like him more. And if you didn't start to develop those feelings, maybe he could stick around as a new buddy? Maybe keep this one away from the juice, though.

   

Anasui woke up the next morning alone, in a bedroom he didn't recognize. He was scared for a second, but he got to calming back down quick. He didn't feel sticky, or gross. He was clothed, well, for the most part. Nothing hurt aside from his splitting head and his empty stomach. The smell of cooking food didn't help it at all.

He looked around. The new morning light lit up the place in warm oranges and yellows. There were clothes scattered around the floor, metal and classic rock posters on the wall next to the big window, the two dressers in the room were covered with carelessly placed books and knick knacks and trinkets that didn't go together. Was he picked up by a teenager?

The door opened, Anasui threw his covers over himself in surprise. He recognized your pretty face. Speckled with a drunken haze that gave you a glow like a halo. Imagining you seeing him in such a state made his cheeks hot, but he tried to ignore it.

"Morning!" You chirped. "How're you feeling?"

Bad. Anasui wanted to say. "Sober." He said instead. At the same time his head throbbed, and Anasui grabbed at his crown, groaning in pain. He changed his mind. "And bad. Everything hurts."

You nodded, "I'll go get you some pain meds, one sec."

He took the two pills gratefully once you came back, along with a cold water bottle that tasted like the nectar of the gods. "Thank you." He said. After a pause he added, "I wasn't too much trouble last night, was I?"

"No way," You giggled. "It's nothing I haven't had to deal with before."

Memories started to trickle in to Anasui. Memories of watching Hermes leave, then Jolyne, then Weather, and Foo Fighters, the memory of him clinging on to a stranger's back sobbing like a loser. Come to think of it, that stranger was probably standing in front of him right now.

The cringe on his face was probably obvious, if the obnoxious laugh you let out was anything to tell by. "Hey, we don't have to talk about last night if you don't want to. I've got breakfast ready in the kitchen. Wanna join?"

The promise of food, maybe bacon and eggs, made Anasui's mouth water. You smirked slightly. "Just put your skirt back on, I'll meet you in the dining room pretty boy." And you left without another word. The little comment made his heart flutter in a weird way. Anasui didn't think little pet names on his appearance would make him feel so light in his chest, but you've proved him wrong.

He put his lace back on, along with the boots and his skirt. But he wanted to keep wearing the Van Halen shirt. What a stupid little thing to get excited over, sharing similar taste in music, but he couldn't help himself.

Your house was much more tidy than your room. It was cozy, and Anasui liked it a lot. He found you setting two plates down, piled high with breakfast food with two glasses of orange drinks. You settled at the table in your seat, looking proud of yourself, "Eat up, afterwards we can drive back to your place. Or go back to the bar, if you have a vehicle."

"Thank you. For everything." His fork poked at some eggs. They were bright yellow, fresh. Anasui had never seen yolks so bright in his life. "I can't remember the last time I had an actual breakfast."

Your smile faltered a little bit at his tone of voice. "It's no worries. Don't beat yourself up over it, I would've done all this for anyone."

"Thinking like that could get you hurt." He muttered rather darkly. You snorted in response. Most of your conversation with him was like that for the rest of breakfast. He was much more mature sober, you appreciated that. Made him much more appealing. He was a little more haughty too, though. Any sarcastic comeback was met with more sarcasm, though sometimes you'd say something that would make Anasui stop and look away. Like the shirt.

It was after he helped clean your dishes. You walked him out to your car, swinging your keys around your pointer while Anasui shielded himself away from the sun like a vampire. He stopped you before you'd completely gotten into your car. He was about to pull off your shirt before you stopped him.

"Keep it." You told him.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"Yeah. Why not? You can give it back next Saturday, after you clean off the drool and makeup." He raised an eyebrow.

"So, this won't be the last time we talk?" You laughed, unlocking the car and getting in. "Shoot, no. We go to the same bar every weekend, I see you every time! Me and my girls will crash your friend's little get together next Saturday, to pay back your babysitting fee."

It was meant as more sarcasm, but the thought of getting to see you again made Anasui's heart jump again. You pulled out of the driveway, leaving back to the bar like Anasui asked. In secret without you seeing it, he enjoyed the smell of your cologne on the fabric of the shirt he wore. It partnered well with his own. He couldn't wait for next week.

[lexisnotasimp]

BBIEAL SU AU pt 1:

Baldi/Emerald:

Baldi is an emerald, and he used to work for yellow diamond until the war started, and he made a team of a few other rebel gems. They all made up fake names for themselves. (I will tell you the reasons and meanings for their fake names later)

He started the team because he was tired of getting bossed around by a diamond and wanted to have a normal life without a diamond controlling him. His team was also allies with the crystal gems. After the war ended him and his team relaxed for the next few thousand years until they heard that Steven (Steven was 13 at this time) was trying to save the world. (This would be set in like season 3)

Baldi and his team were sometimes helping the crystal gems until su future, when they quit battling.

Mr. Thing/Holly Blue Agate:

Mr. Thing is a Holly Blue Agate, and just like Baldi, he used to work for a diamond blue diamond in specific but then rebelled and started working for Baldi's team. He is the second in command in the team and would usually be more cautious of anyone not in the team.

Mr. Thing was very cautious when Lex first decided to help, and he would make sure she didn't try to shatter anyone, but then he became less cautious when he knew she was actually helping with them. He usually plays chess with the other team members (mostly Mrs. Pomp).

Mrs. Pomp:

Mrs. Pomp is a rose quartz and obviously used to work for pink. She then Rebeled and joined the team.

Mrs. Pomp is the healer of the team since she is a rose quartz. Mrs. Pomp is very sweet unless you anger her, and she has a really bad temper when angered.

Dr. Reflex:

Dr. Reflex is a Jasper and used to work for pink just like Mrs. Pomp. Just like everyone else, he rebelled and joined baldi's team. He is the fighter, and in the last season, when he gets uncorrupted, Bismuth gives him the doctors hammer thing because he looks like a doctor with his new outfit.

He was in the war and became corrupted in a fight. In season 3, he first met Lex while she was sleeping in an Amythest kindergarten. He couldn't talk because he's corrupted and his teammates weren't around. So he woke her up, and then he fell in love with her but would never show It until he became uncorrupted in the last season.

Lex:

Lex is just a normal human, and she later joined the team in season 3. When she first met Dr. Reflex, she was scared of him but thought he was adorable a minute later. And she didn't fall in love with him until he became uncorrupted.

Lex is the detective of the team and would spot any clues out. Only being in the team for a few months, they quickly got used to her, and she would play chess with Mr. Thing.

Later in su future, she got married to Dr. Reflex since they have been together for a few years.

---

Extra:

How they got their nicknames (ps this is not from the characters' perspective):

Baldi: Because Mr. Thing would joke about it since he's almost bald.

Mr. Thing: He thought it sounded cool and formal.

Dr. Reflex: He saw it in a poster in a small town and thought it sounded cool.

Mrs. Pomp: Because one of her human friends was named that.

(also yes i acted like they were in the show (because i said what seasons something happens to them in) so its easier for me to tell you guys when they appear or what happens to them)

[transneonneko]

Things from Archie Sonic that I would love to see return in the Mainline Games and/or IDW Sonic!!

Recently, I decided to read some of the Archie Sonic Comic, from like issue 186ish up until the first MegaMan crossover and the reboot, mainly because there were some gaps in my knowledge of those stories. Mainly Issues 198 till 235, which I never got to read as a kid and, I have to say, there were a lot of really interesting concepts during Ian's run of comics before the reboot that I really loved. There was a lot of really interesting concepts I love after the reboot too. I wanna celebrate that. A lot of these concepts and story idea I feel really deserve another chance.

So I wanna make this list of stuff I wanna see return in either for stories in the Mainline Games or the IDW Sonic comics. Before we start, I do wanna add somethings. This post isn't meant to be shitting on IDW and being like "IDW would be better if they did this". I really love the IDW comics and universe. I also know that some of these concepts likely can't be done due SEGA Mandates and I'm not gonna include stuff like "Bring back the Freedom Fighters" because I feel asking to bring back characters isn't gonna be very productive, as much as I would like to see their return. Anyways, let's begin.

The Fate of the ARK

One thing that really inspired this list was this scene right her. We'll talk more about Silver's Future later but for now, let's focus on the ARK. I'm gonna assume anyone reading this knows the story of the ARK from SA2 and Shadow. Sadly, the ARK hasn't really been revisited in the main canon since Shadow, despite how iconic of a set piece it is. In the Archie Comics, we get a look at Silver's future and one of things that may have been the cause of how bad things are is the ARK crashed. Sadly, Archie got rebooted before the writers could go more into it but, from SA2, we know that the ARK was set to crash into the planet if all 7 Chaos Emeralds are placed into it, wiping out all life on the planet. This could be an excellent premise of another Silver adventure, whether it be in the comics or games, where Sonic, Silver and some friends have to stop someone from making the ARK crash into the planet.

Expanding the Eggman Empire/Egg Bosses

Something I've always found a bit lacking in the game canon is how the Eggman Empire itself has been presented. In the games, the Eggman Empire is usually just made up of Eggman, Metal Sonic, Orbot, Cubot, a bunch of robots and (recently) Infinite. It's not really an Empire if it's just one guy and a bunch of robots. The main goal is the conquer the world but we hardly see Eggman actually see what happens when Eggman conquers a place, like what happens to the people who used to live there, besides like Colours and Forces, where the Wisps and Mobians are usually just seen being imprisoned. The Egg Bosses are the perfect solution to this and adds so much to Sonic's World.

The Egg Bosses are Mobians who, either willingly or unwillingly, aligned themselves up with Eggman for whatever reason, becoming commanders of the Eggman Empire. This usually comes about when Eggman has taken over a part of the region and the people living in that region have no choice but to join the Eggman Empire, for their own safety. Not only does this make the Eggman Empire feel more than just one person but it also makes Eggman more a villain himself. It able to portray Eggman as someone to be feared and, I mean, this is a dictator and genocider who is pretty much declaring war against the world.

It also brings up some interesting thoughts about the world. Characters like Maw, Thunderbolt and even Nephthys to a degree joined up with Eggman because they felt it was the right thing to do for the sake of the world, or in Nephthys case, to stop things getting worst later on, meanwhile characters like Grand Battle Kukku are plotting to usurp Eggman, with Clove and Beauregard only working for Eggman to protect family or close ones.

As I said before, having these Egg Bosses also makes Eggman look more threaten, both because he's able to look like a "bigger bad" next to these villains he has command of and, because almost all the Egg Bosses hate Eggman's guts, they are cyberized, a terrifying process in which those who work for Eggman are focus to have parts of their body replaced with cybernetics, with either bombs which will blow if they decide to leave or a locking mechanism that will paralyze their entire body, ready to be locked up.

If either in the game or the IDW comic, I would like to see the Egg Boss concept return. It doesn't even need to be the same characters or use the name "Egg Boss." It would help expand the army of the Eggman Empire, as well as provide some fun bosses for the games I think.

Mobians and Humans living together

This was always a weird hangup I felt the series had. In the case of games between Sonic Adventure & Unleashed, Sonic and friends were the only Mobians, humans made up the NPCs while Mobians were reserved for main characters. Then in Forces and IDW, Mobians made up the background characters, so then Eggman is the only human. I really prefer it when they have the two living together, it makes it seems more normal and, honestly, a better solution than the whole "Two Worlds" explanation.

Eggman Seemingly Defeated

Can I just that I love Issues 198-200? In these 3 issues, Sonic and friends Eggman's main base, the Egg Dome. This including fighting on the outside of the base, involving fighting hoards of the Dark Egg Legion soldiers and Eggman in the Egg Phoenix. After dealing with the outside, Sonic and friends raid the Egg Dome itself, taking different directions, with the Dark Egg Legion seemingly retreating, until they reach the center of the base, where they are blocked off by a barricade, which only Sonic can pass through, giving a "Point of No Return" vibe, Dark Egg Legion soldiers lining up and saluting Sonic. Then Sonic reaches the center and finds Eggman in the Egg Tarantula, starting their final battle which Sonic wins. This defeat is enough for Eggman to lose his sanity, seemingly ending the war Sonic and the Freedom Fighters have been fighting their entire life.

Of course Eggman returns but, god, it's just such a memorable couple of issues. There's a real sense of finality to it. I would a sequence like this in the games, something that feels like truly ending the Eggman Empire and defeating them once and for all. Of course, it wouldn't be the end, Sonic games are always needing to be made which would lead to...

The New Rulers of the Eggman Empire

In the comics after the defeat of Eggman, the Eggman Empire is taken over by some of it's Commanders, the Iron Queen and Iron King, who rules the Empire as their own until they are defeated and Eggman's return.

I love the idea that even if the Eggman, there will always be someone there to take his place. The games could do this by having Neo Metal or Infinite take his place. Hell, IDW did have Neo Metal take over but I think what made that less interesting was that Neo Metal wasn't doing it for himself, he was doing it for Eggman. I think this would work well if a concept like the Egg Boss was introduced in the games, maybe have one of the characters part of that group take over OR have a lot of the more ambitious Egg Bosses war against each other to take command, until eventually Eggman returns and puts them in line.

Silver's Future

Silver is one of the most recurring characters, who always joins the gang when his future is in trouble. The problem is that we never see his future besides 06. We have no idea what Silver's future is currently until it's in danger and, even then, we never see it.

We see Silver's Future in both continuities of the Archie Comic, with two different takes. Pre-SGW has a destroyed city vibe, like 06 but less lava. Post-SGW brought a whole new take where people are ruled by a corrupt council where people are put into class groups, and security robots will arrest if you are not at your job at the right time. They even re-contextualize Silver's bracelets as cuffs that the robots can activate. With Silver being my favourite character as a kid, I remember being obsessed with this new world and story, wanting to know more.

I'm not saying they would need to copy this world exactly but it would be nice if they gave us a concrete and consistence look for Silver's Future.

The Heroic Metal Sonic

Right before the SGW, we were introduce to Shard the Metal Sonic. His story is that he was the original Metal Sonic, the one that raced Sonic in Stardust Speedway. He appeared later in the comic, where Sonic made him realized there was more to life than just being Eggman's killing machine. He seemingly died, but was rebuilt to serve as a member the Secret Freedom Fighters.

This one would be tricky to be included. It worked in the Archie comic as they had been many Metal Sonics throughout the series, each one getting destroyed. Meanwhile, there's only officially been one Metal Sonic in the games made by Eggman (two if we count Classic and Modern). Admittedly, Gemerl fits Shard's personality and does need to be used more in the games but having it be Metal Sonic is just a cooler concept.

I think a solution to this is that we have Metal Sonic 1.0 made by Eggman and, in Rivals 2, we have Metal Sonic 3.0 by Eggman Nega from the future. But what about Metal Sonic 2.0? I think we could have a game where after Metal Sonic fails, Eggman builds a replacement, being 2.0, which would give reason to Metal Sonic wanting to revolt, which could lead to a redemption? While I am loving the IDW comics, I do really miss a lot of what both Archie continuities offered. I haven't mention the some other concepts and stories I liked that really focused on certain characters such as Naugus, Geoffrey St. John, Dimitri etc. Maybe I'll talk about that another day...

[soulmate-game]

Upon further consideration. Even though it is entirely the wrong ecosystem and I know I already said that Merman!Adrien was born in the coral reefs. But. He totally looks like a betta fish. This guy is colorful and has long, beautiful fins and he totally has little neck fins that pop out when he’s angry (but just make him look even more adorable to everyone else). Like, if the mer-community cared at all about photography, he would still be an underwater model. Does everyone forget the fact that he’s one of the fastest swimmers in the School and definitely a vicious fighter when he needs to be? Yes. Yes they do.

Meanwhile, I don’t know you guys caught my little Easter egg before. But I totally want to make the Gotham Sirens all actual sirens in this AU. Because it works, and it’s funny. So here’s the rundown;

Selina Kyle: I want her based on an iridescent shark— which isn’t a shark, it’s a species of catfish. Which is... maybe partly why I chose it. Because of this, her tail is all her black, but in the right light some of her body is iridescent and shines with soft blues and purples. This isn’t bioluminescence like with a deep sea mermaid, it’s just the color of her skin shifting in the right light like glitter. I say skin, because she doesn’t have scales (iridescent sharks have no scales). So her tail is smooth and slippery. Great for escapes. Being a siren, some of her features are exaggerated even on her fish half. So, her tail fin is more flowy and feathery, almost like a beta fish’s but not nearly as long, and the edges of the tail fin are extra thin, so that they shine and are extra iridescent even in dim lighting. She doesn’t have whiskers, but she does have minor control over her hair. She can control how it floats or falls in order to evoke a certain aesthetic, and the tips of her hair do act as weak sensors. She can’t grab anything with it though, it’s kind of like if you can wiggle your ears. You can move it, but you can’t really... do much with that.

Harley Quinn: totally based off a Mandarinfish/ mandarin dragonet. She has a shorter tail than most mermaids, but it’s much wider and rounder. She has a long torso though, with a decently large, rounded dorsal fin on the middle of her spine. She is very, very colorful. You can tell she is meant to be a siren that captivates immediately, whereas Selina is more of a siren that was meant to allure with mystery. Harley is all bright blues and reds and the occasional dash of pink, supplemented by a few black spots and outlines to bring the other colors into sharper focus. She isn’t fast like Selina, but she is small and agile and very hard to grab ahold of. Her fins are very thin and delicate, but soft and incredibly flexible so they are almost impossible to grab and keep hold of. She is also scaleless like Selina, and her tail naturally produces a mucus that is enhanced by her Siren genes. Instead of being a smelly deterrent, Harley’s natural mucus is actually a quick-acting toxin that can be absorbed by the skin and induces hallucinations. She can control when she does or doesn’t produce it. She still keeps her hair up in pigtails (her hair is mostly blonde, but her fish half does color the tips of each side of her hair so she still has the split blue-and-pink look. Only natural this time). Don’t underestimate her just because she is much more compact in size than a normal siren/mer-person. She has a surprising amount of strength in her upper body to compensate for her lack of easily maneuverable tail.

Poison Ivy: I couldn’t quite decide which species I wanted most, but I knew immediately she had to be an eel mermaid. She’s still very environmentalist and all about protecting the oceans, she will straight up terrify to death anyone she catches dumping in the ocean. Litterbugs, beware. But we’re gonna go with a mix of a dragon moray eel and a snowflake moray. Her main body is dark green, but she has black-and-orange spots down her body and tail. Some look like leaves, others look like skulls. Really, it’s like an ink blot test so it mostly depends on whether or not she’s trying to intimidate the people who see her. Scared people will see skulls, people who are on her good side will usually fondly pick out leaf-patterns (Harley). And she still lives up to the nickname Poison Ivy (humans have this name to her, and she liked it) because she entire body is riddled with different toxins. Like Harley, her body can produce a toxic mucus— but Ivy’s mucus-toxin just makes the victim very drowsy and uncoordinated. Her kiss is also toxic, and is boosted by her Siren powers. Anyone she kisses, as long as she wills it, is temporarily mindlessly in love with her and will work to please her even without her having to say anything. This can be as simple as saving her from a tough situation to... more. Ivy is also the largest of the three infamous Sirens, clocking in at right about ten feet long from head to the tip of her tail, and she is the most physically strong. She suffers a bit in the mobility department purely because of how big her body is, but she is still extremely agile and quick-striking. She often hides amongst kept forests and dense seaweed because she likes plants more than people, but also because her body easily camouflages amongst the similar shapes and colors. Both a captivator and a mysterious beauty in her own right, she has skills that match both Selina and Harley in the Siren department, but it’s tempered by the fact that Ivy is the most quick to attack. Harley enjoys playing with her prey much more, Ivy just does what she needs to be able to get to the violent part. She is picky in her prey, however, in that she really prefers only preying on those who harm the ocean.

General siren information for this AU (or my take on it, anyway). Sirens do have a few common traits that solidify them as one distinct race of Mer-people even with each one usually taking on very different fish-traits. The most well known is a siren’s Charm ability, in which they can use their voice to captivate an audience and perform minor hypnosis. This can be done through both singing and regular speech, as long as their voice is in use and they are putting care into the types of tones they are using. The Charm ability becomes entirely ineffective on other mer-people once they realize that a Siren is not a normal mer-person and even if they don’t know, other mer-people are resistant to the Charm effect. It can only be as potent as social manipulation on other sea dwellers, and cannot make a mermaid or merman do something too far out of their normal character. For humans, knowing they are being Charmed allows them to slowly build up a resistance to the charm’s effect. If they build up enough resistance, then they become effectively immune unless caught off guard. A Charmed human will do almost anything the siren demands, as long as it is not drastic enough to shock the human out of the mind control (i.e telling them to kill a loved one or jump to their death knowingly).

Sirens are largely carnivores, where normal mer-people are omnivores. Some sirens (Ivy) do participate in eating humans, but it is known to be fairly unhealthy (like eating junk food) so it is now done mostly in moderation. Sirens have two sets of teeth, but unlike Deep Sea mermaids, neither set is retractable. The set that is visible is human-like, while behind those human teeth hides a set of needle-like teeth that can slightly extend further out of the gums when necessary for hunting but cannot be completely hidden. These teeth are backward’s curving, like giant snake teeth, and it is notoriously difficult to escape a Siren’s bite.

Sirens, unlike other mer-people, actually do have a need for air and cannot breathe under water. They can hold their breath for hours at a time and speak under water, much like dolphins, but they need to break the surface for air at least once or twice a day. This, of course, leads to more contact with humans.

Sirens are the only mer-people who can develop legs. This happens when they let themselves completely dry out, and if they desire to they can morph their tail into two legs. Their legs will never look human however, as their toes will be webbed and everything below their bellybutton will still be the same colors and pattern as when it is a tail, along with any scales or armor plates they might have remaining. A siren can only maintain this shape for a maximum of forty-eight hours before their skin dries out too much and they start to get dehydrated. Immediately upon contact with water over three inches deep, their legs will begin to re-morph into a tail. Splashing the skin with small amounts of water will only delay dehydration for a maximum of an extra twenty-four hours, as the body consumes water faster than it can be replaced by splashing or small amounts of rain.

That’s what I got :) hope you like it!

[themadauthorshatter]

... I just love OTPs, I can't help it.

OTP HEADCANONS: 2020 Edition

These will include the series of Red Queen, Dorothy Must Die, SGE, The Folk of The Air, and Nightmare Before Christmas(I'll throw in the Skellington kids, too, because I love them💙)

MAJOR TW FOR ALL THE EVENTS THAT OCCURED IN 2020, AND THAT INCLUDES QUARANTINE.

RED QUEEN:

At the news of a Pandemic, Mare and Cal are equally confused and scared, but at least they're not on the battlefield.

They hold up in Paradise Valley until the quarantine is lifted.

It starts off fine with them doing puzzles, hiking, and doing some exercises to pass the time. Then 3 weeks pass and both are bored; Mare's bored enough to drink coffee onto of the fridge and Cal's sitting in a chair upside down because fuck court etiquette, he's so bored.

Cal contemplates luring wolves with dinner scraps again.

They had a mini argument that meant nothing because Cal's hair got long and he wanted Mare to cut it, she but only offered to shave his stubble, not cut his hair.

They both get a lot of sleep, and have a lot of nightmares, which they comfort each other from.

They also really enjoy the silence.

Cal gets into poetry and Mare paints. Both are surprised at how good the other is at their new hobbies.

They talk. A lot. It begins awkwardly and ends with the two in each other's arms.

Cal becomes more of a punner, and Mare loves and hates it.

There's tall of getting a dog, but there's one problem: Paradise Valley doesn't have any shelters, and they'll be arrested or forced ro turn back hime, regardless of rank.

Mare grows taller... by 2 inches. She almost killed Cal for how much he laughed.

When they're allowed to go out, Mare often forgets to bring her mask.

Cal's good at remembering their masks.

Mare REFUSES to leave when she hears about the murder hornets.

Cal gets repellent to calm her down.

They also recover some Old Era TV Shows.

ENDLESS quotes from The Office, Friends, and many more shows.

Cal visits Maven's grave more. Mare comes with every now and then, but usually lets him go alone.

They don't usually argue, but those arguments never last.

They tried a bit of ability training, and greed that they should be careful when Mare summoned a bolt of lightning from the sky and Cal almost set fire to everything around them.

They read a lot, too, but Cal reads more than Mare because she falls asleep, usually on him.

DOROTHY MUST DIE:

Nox had no clue what a Pandemic was, or what the big deal was about going outside and not being near people, until Amy explained it.

First day of online school crashed and burned because Nox had NO IDEA what he was doing, which led to Amy 'accompanying' him in classes.

Amy puts her college plans on hold for a little while.

Nox is more emotional and neither of them know how to handle it.

They have more nightmares, since there's nothing to keep their minds busy, but Amy is more reserved about it. Nox prefers to write about what he dreams, anyway.

Nox stays up, from all the nightmares, but Amy sits with him to keep him company.

When Amy heard about the murder hornets, Nox held up a fly swatter and opened all the windows.

Amy does fine, but Nox dies from boredom, when they're done with school. And I don't mean he just sits and groans, he lies face down on the couch as Amy tries to get him up.

They spend A LOT of time in Nox's apartment, and it's literally spotless because Nox is THAT bored.

They binge a lot of TV shows, and Nox falls in love with shows like Peaky Blinders.

They tried watching Game of Thrones. It didn't go well; negative past experiences.

Nox figured out the plot twist to The Umbrella Academy WAY before Amy did.

They watched Heathers and Amy asked Nox what he'd do if she was dealing with trash friends and guys who don't take 'no' for an answer. The look on his face when he asked who it was reminded Amy of who he was before meeting her.

Nox finds YouTube and discovers the guy that makes knives out of anything and makes it his mission to copy each and every video, come Hell or high water.

Amy walked in on him doing this and genuinely wondered if he was okay, and asked if she could help him.

They also binged musicals. Nox isn't a huge music person, but he still loves them; Kansas has its own magic that he finds intriguing.

Amy once found Nox crouching ontop of the fridge while drinking a mug of coffee.

Madison stopped by and dropped off some rhinestones, lash glue, and a tool to apply the stones. Amy spent a lot of time putting the stones on her face while Nox watched, with Madison and Dustin also watching via Facetime, sitting backwards in a chair and wondering what her plan was, even making very Julien Solomita-esque comments, mixed with very 'I used to be a fighter and a spy' comments that made Amy, Madison, and Dustin laugh. Some if those comments:

"I know Glamora told you to lighten up, but I don't she'd expect this."

"If those were real diamonds, you wouldn't need any armor or a weapon. Just headbutt them, and you're good."

"Don't be upset, but it's the beginning of summer, so I don't think winter's coming any time soon."

"Whichever chandelier you made out with, I will find them, damn it."

After a little while, Amy asked if Nox wanted a rhinestone face. He agreed, but only as long as she took out all the red stones. He could handle pink, but no red.

It took them an hour to get the stones off.

Their hair gets long and they agree to cut each other's hair. Nox cuts her hair chin length and Amy tries to be as style his hair. They don't look the best, but they at least look good.

They absolutely watch Unus Annus, and start quoting that.

When they get the news they can go out wearing a mask, Nox got confused and got 3 different masks: a masquerade mask, a normal face mask, and a gas mask, which he wears all the time to annoy Amy.

They do stay in shape as much as possible, but there is evidence that they could have been more active, with their muscles shrinking and both having lost a little weight.

Nox NEVER drops his guard, and quarantine didn't help.

They tried dying their hair, but it didn't work as well as they'd hoped.

SCHOOL FOR GOOD AND EVIL:

Tedros worries about Agatha and everyone else, but Agatha keeps him in check.

Crime drops big time, so that's a plus for Tedros and Agatha.

They have more time to breathe, with everyone being inside and avoiding each other.

Tedros hates the quiet at first, but Agatha helps him adjust.

They spend a lot of time wandering the castle and answering whatever call there is, if any.

The SGE is out for a little while, so they don't hear too much from there.

Tedros, without normal king business to distract him, has more nightmares and starts losing sleep because he doesn't want to dream about what's happened to him and his friends.

Agatha has nightmares, too, but she's better at hiding it.

They do talk about it and agree to be more open with what's going on in their heads.

They also agree that they'll help each other through these times.

Tedros helps Agatha with swordplay and Agatha both gets him into reading more and tries to help him with his magic.

Whenever there's something they need outside, Agatha gets it because she's not that afraid of getting sick; she grew up eating frog and lizard soup.

Tedros worries about her, but doesn't really stop her because she's taller, and having fun trying to stop Agatha once she's committed to doing something.

Tedros finds a new hobby: origami.

Agatha doesn't join in, per se, she more watches because she's never seen Tedros be so patient with something.

They play around with each other's hair, as it grows longer. Agatha ties Tedros's hair back and Tedros braids her hair.

They write to Sophie or anyone else, like people who have some sort of report of a crime or complaint duch as infertile soil, so their penmanship improves.

Tedros grows a bit of a stubble and, after some prickly kiss attacks, Agatha threatens to shave it off herself, if he doesn't. It's all in good fun, but she sort of did mean it because his face and cheeks were really scratchy.

Tedros REFUSES to let Agatha go out alone, even when she's masked up.

When they go out, Tedros always carries a sword.

Picnics in the woods.

Star gazing at night.

Agatha starts wearing pants, as an experiment, and her "dresser"/dress designer is APPALLED.

There are times they argue, but they stay together and communicate because relationship goals.

THE CRUEL PRINCE:

At the news of a Pandemic/plague, Cardan ordered all the human servants to get as healthy as they could so they'd be able to go outside. He would accompany them, but they could not let Jude go out.

She's not happy, when she finds out

Cardan asks if she can avoid going to the human world, so she doesn't get sick.

She goes anyway and returns unscathed.

Cardan considers glamoring the human servants to keeep Jude healthy, but Jude almost pincushions him for it.

Anxious? Worried? Psh! Don't be silly. Cardan becomes somethimg if a paranoid maniac because he's scared of Jude getting sick and dying because he's Fae and she's Mortal, so she's more susceptible to illnesses and he doesn't know wnoufh about mortals to get her healthy agaun were she to get sick, but there's nothing wroung with him, really.

Whenever they're not ruling, Jude practices her swordplay while Cardan reads, major plus being that he reads full series to not worry about Jude so much.

Jude helps Cardan with sword fighting, using wooden practice swords not metal, and Cardan helps her try to get into reading, reading to her as she rests her head on his chest when she doesn't want to read read.

Cardan discovers manga and graphic novels and is too confused for Jude NOT to laugh; "He's in armor made if IRON. How is he able to fly!?" "I've seen a lot people different people, and none of them have made this face." "... So is Spiderman THIS one or THIS one?"

Sword practice usually ends with Cardan on the ground exhausted while Jude simply stands and chuckles for him to get up.

Cardan doesn't get beat smd scarred, he gets poked and minorly bruised, which he was not ready for because of how he was treated by Balekin.

One day, while Cardan was reading some Sherlock Holmes, Jude slipped hoop bracelets on and tied ribbons to his tail, at least as many as she could before she got caught; she only realized as such when his tail started flicking out of her reach and curling around her wrist, and saw Cardan grinning at her.

They do visit Taryn and Vivi still, but Cardan only wears a mask to remind Jude, who does not forget ever.

Cardan thinks about his 'friendship' Nicasia, Locke, and Valerian and semi-realizes that Valerian and Locke may have been using him while Nicasia was at least a little genuine.

They talk about Locke and equally wish that they had helped Taryn in killing Locke. If not, then they wish that they at least watched. They agreed that if time travel was real, Jude could help Trayn kill Locke and Cardan could watch, as long as he helped dispose of the body.

They laughed at that a couple minutes later.

THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS(Featuring the Skellington kids(I'd say Skull Kids, but I feel like Skull Kid(s) was taken)):

Jack knows what a Pandemic is; he lived through one while he was alive.

Sally knew it would happen because she knows one happens about every two hundred years/whenever a year ends in 20.

The triplets know what a plague is, but have never seen one actually happen.

When they explored the human world at night and noticed there were absolutely no humans in sight, Luna reminded her brothers that the humans were told to stay inside to prevent any spreading.

Jacob takes the opportunity to MAKE SURE people actually stay inside.

Pro: he got Instagram famous. Con: Jack and Sally were not happy at all with how reckless he was.

Let's say, for the sake of the story, Halloween had to be cancelled worldwide because regulation and a need for things to get better.

Upon hearing the news of Halloween getting cancelled, Jack was very salty about it; "Why cancel Halloween, if the 4th of July was still allowed to be celebrated?"

All of Halloween Town was very upset; the living are so fragile, it ruins the fun of scaring them.

The Mayor was in deep, DEEP distress, but Jack made it up to him, and the rest of the town, by saying next year's Halloween would be ine no one would ever forget, and it's not because he's 'borrowing' a holiday again, it's because they'll all have a year of scaring shenanigans built up inside them all that will make up for what was missed.

Everyone rejoiced and Jack, once he got back inside his house with his wife and children, sighed and mentally kicked himself for saying no one would forget next year's Halloween; there was one Halloween in particular he sure as hell isn't forgetting any time soon.

Daemon's carving more intricate pumpkins and plans on giving the humans mini-scares so they keep quarantining, hiding a 'surprise' for any entitled Karens he finds.

Luna is the most obedient of the triplets by staying in Halloween Town and instead studying what she calls a 'counter-plague' so there's no need for a Pandemic; she refuses to call it a vaccine because that would imply sje wants to help the humans that shot down and could have killed her dad. She still has a bone to pick.

Jack doesn't spiral out like in the movie, he has Sally to help and the triplets to keep his mind busy.

While Jacob and Daemon keep the humans from leaving their houses, Luna researches the current events and learns of murder hornets that are large, sting like all hell, and cause death to anyone unfortunate enough to get stung.

Jack gets very intrigued and they collect as many as they can and keep them in a jar, but take one out to study it.

They were not impressed; murder hornets? Jack has seen worse.

Since there wasn't a Halloween, Jack decided to walk through the streets, seeing as how Daemon and Jacob already did a lot of the scaring for him(thise little shits). He had to admit, it was nice to walk in the night and only hear the animal sounds and not screams.

Luna did not find a 'counter-plague,' even with Sally's help, but she did discover some poisons she could use against her brothers. Sally made her promise not to do so.

On the Halloween night where nothing happened, Jack took his family out to a picnic/star gazing session. Genuinely one of his favorite Halloweens to date.

HENRY STICKMIM COLLECTION:

Henry and Ellie knew it was going to happen and were more than surprised to also see Charles planning ahead by making a list for what they needed, even admitting he'd been following the news and rumors and stocking up on ADD medicine so he wouldn't have to go out to get them.

The other soldiers weren't worried until they were told to go home and take a break for a little bit.

Triple Threat wasn't really effected until day 24.

On day 1, they just hung out and were relatively calm, working online, doing workouts to stay fit, and just being as normal as possible.

On day 24, all three are more than a little bored. Henry's bored enough to andwer calls from telemarketers and prank them, Ellie's contemplating bleaching her hair with peroxide, and Charles is playing with fidget toys he's bough and collected over the years, though he's doing it more because he's a little stressed than bored.

Henry and Ellie are surprised to this this, but Charles admits he used to bite his nails a lot, but stopped after a LONG while.

Speaking of names, Ellie paints hers and the boys', though while Henry paints his in clear coat, Charles paints one hand black and the other in red, mint, and glittery pink on one nail because try stopping him.

It makes Ellie laugh and pisses off Henry so much.

Ellie gets calls from her family saying they want her to come home, or closer to home, because they're worried and she instead blocks their numbers.

They watch a lot of horror movies as a reason to stay inside.

When they get bored of American horror and try Japanese, Asian, and more western horror movies.

Instant regret.

They watched the movie Audition and Henry looked at a very unimpressed Charles, who said the antagonist was being sloppy, and hid all the kitchen knives, saws, and sharp and blunt objects, including tools(must've remembered Human Piece).

He stopped after a week of Charles being himself and literally shaking at Hannibal Lecter as they watched the Silence of The Lambs series.

All three open up more about their lives. It's ugly, there's yelling, conflicting life philosophies, and even some insults thrown. Henry admits that gotten screwed over by the law enough times while fending for himself to have as little faith in it as possible, Ellie admits she ran away from home and would rather die than go back because of how tight of a leash they kept her on, and Charles admits that while he has thought about quitting on the government and turning to a life of crime, he never did because that would have been to easy of a choice. Training for the military was and still is hard as hell, which Henry and Ellie can tell because Charles can physically do more than them(if they ran a mile, Henry and Ellie would be exhausted and Charles wouldn't even be out of breath), but he's never given up on it because he knew his parents would skin him, if they were still alive.

There were tears at the end, and the team all needing to be alone for a little bit, but they were back together and agreed to be a little more open with each other, since they were a team now.

[noodle-puppy]

Critical Role Campaign 3 Race and Class Hopes and Predictions

So here I am, going to throw my hat in the ring guessing what I think the cast of Critical Role are playing, giving that Campaign 3 is just around the corner. I’ll probably be wrong but I think I’ll have fun with this! Guesses are under the cut, as this post might get long...

TRAVIS: Centaur Order of the Lycan Blood Hunter

Travis seems to prefer melee combatants who just hit things and get the job done; supposedly he’s said somewhere about not wanting to play a full-caster, yet I’ve seen a lot of predictions for Wizard (though I can see why). Blood Hunter seems like an obvious choice, but perhaps too obvious - but I can’t deny that I would love to see Travis go full werewolf! Besides, with what happened to Mollymauk and all, this class needs more time to shine: so Order of the Lycan Blood Hunter it is! Honourable mentions to Bard, Monk and Rogue; as they’re also classes I’d like to see Travis play.

For the species pick, I’d kill to see Travis play a Centaur. The idea of a centaur werwolf is hilarious to me, and has evocative imagery! I know that as fey creatures centaurs can’t normally get lycanthropy, but I can see Matt making an exception for the reasons I just said. Realistically though, I think he’ll pick a Human, so if he does you can’t say I was wrong! >:)

LAURA: Tabaxi Echo Knight Fighter

My first thought was Bard, but after Jester I don’t think Laura will want to be a support class any time soon. I think she’ll be a melee combatant, probably one without magic since both Vex and Jester had magic at their disposal. Barbarian is a popular pick for her, and while I can see the appeal, I’m going with Fighter. Perhaps she’ll go Echo Knight as a fun callback to Jester’s Invoke Duplicity? It’d be a pretty cool subclass to see in action!

As for species, I think we all want to see a Tabaxi. I'm getting early 2000′s 3D platformer vibes from this character, akin to Ratchet and Clank and Sly Cooper.

LIAM: Drow College of Tragedy Bard

Liam has gone on record to say that he’s playing through the four traditional RPG classes: Fighter (Orym), Thief (Vax), Mage (Caleb) and Healer. Cleric seems to be the obvious pick here (and hey, it’s probably right), but honestly? I’d love to see Liam as a Bard. I think he’d have a lot of fun taking a class associated with cheerfulness and revelry and injecting it with his trademark angst and sorrow. Could be a fun subversion! Apparently Matt has a Shakespearian homebrew College of Tragedy subclass in the works, and I think I’d be perfect to debut here!

Species-wise my first thought was Warforged, since they exist in Exandria now and the idea of a robot with instruments integrated into its body is very cool (write that down!), I’d love to see an Elf in the main cast, and I can see Liam paying tribute to Essek by making a Dark Elf his choice.

SAM: Kenku Circle of Dreams Druid

I know that Liam picks Sam’s combo, but from what I’ve seen Sam is the opposite of Travis: he loves magic-based characters, cleverly manipulating the games with his usual chaotic glee. A Wild Magic Sorcerer is probably going to be the winner (I like the theory of him and Laura making Wild Magic siblings!), but if a man can dream I’d like to see him as a Druid. I’d like to see a high Wisdom character from him, but yet the idea of messing around with Wild Shape is too good to pass up. I have no preference on subclass, so I’ll just pick Circle of Dreams because it sounds cool.

As you can tell I’d like to see more monstrous characters this time around, and you know what would be perfect for Sam? A Kenku. I’d trust no one else to pull it off. Also a kenku usually has black wings, so they’re totally going to be the love interest of Marisha’s character. Nailed the most important question!

MARISHA: Fairy Oath of the Crown Paladin

Speaking of, Marisha has summoned the wrath of nature as Keyleth and the might of martial arts as Beau; so this time it’d be interesting to see her step back and make a support character instead. We’ve already got Liam as our healer, but I think it’s time we had someone start out as a Paladin! Marisha looks like she has the gusto to pull off any of the subclasses, but of the lot the Oath of the Crown is catching my eye.

Something I’d like to see from this campaign is some of the new races, and one of my new favourites was released just recently - the Fairy! Only problem is they can’t fly in medium or heavy armour, so maybe we’ll see an unconventional Paladin build here?

ASHLEY: Dhampir Way of the Long Death Monk/Phantom Rogue

I’m going to be predictable here and say Ashley’s playing a Monk, a class that she expressed interest in during the Vox Machine vs Mighty Nein oneshot. I’m picking Way of the Long Death as the subclass to pair well with my species choice. On a similar note, the Phantom subclass of the Rogue will also work, and after her miserable dice luck I’d want Ashley to play a character with a consistent set of skills: she’ll finally get a good Slealth check!

Ashley’s seems to like playing characters at extreme ends of the spectrum -  Pike and Fearne look innocent, yet hold terrifying power; Yasha looks gothic and intimidating, but is gentle and introverted outside of battle. I’d like to see a character from her who looks like they could kill you and will, and the Dhampir is a fairly new playable species which not only fits the bill, but could lend itself to some great roleplay.

TALESIN: Fire Genasi Alchemist Artificer/Genie Warlock

Talesin seems almost inscrutable to guess for, so it was a hard pick for me here. I’ve got to be honest and say that 99% of what you see here is wish fulfilment, so if I’m just pulling everything out of thin air I think Talesin has what it takes to be a great Artificer, considering he knows a lot about the game. And the Alchemist subclass means that he could have a lot of fun with a mad scientist character. But this party is skewing towards support, and I would like to see a proper caster here beside the Druid. It ultimately came between Sorcerer and Warlock, but I think Warlock wins in the end. The Genie subclass is maybe cliche considering the race I went with but again, I can do what I want :P

Genasi is one of my favourite playable species, and while I know we just had Fy’ra Rai, a Fire Genasi is going to be my pick here. A hotheaded scientist with his efreeti parent watching on is what I’m going for with these choices.

So that’s all I’ve got in me (my arm is so sore from typing this guys); I might reblog this with further thoughts once we figure out who the characters are once and for all!

[high-off-energon]

I saw your pinned post saying requests are open ? (If not just ignore this) But could i get headcanons/reactions of any of the autobots(TFP) reacting to their human charge (who's usually quiet/shy/insecure being captured by a con and when the con holds them up to their face, the human charge just utterly destroys the cons optic by punching their arm through it. And after words when they're safe start crying and tell their guardian they never wanted to hurt anyone (Aka, back to soft and shy mode)

Optimus

He enjoys the company of his shy little friend. They’re just so gentle and a calm distraction from the war

How they got dragged along with the other kids onto the battlefield he has no idea, but feels his spark drop at the sight of you in Starscream’s talons

They looked so scared and small, and yet, almost irritated in the mech’s clutch

“So, are you going to let us have this energon? Or are you going to risk this fleshbag��s-“

Starscream suddenly shrieks after a small shattering sound, and nobody has any clue what happened besides Optimus.

The kid he thought of as so pacifist that they couldn’t even hurt a fly whipped around and punched Starscream in the optic. The optic!

He was very happy to have them safe back in the base, only to realize they’re crying.

“I didn’t want to hurt anyone!”

Bless their heart

Ratchet

Ohhhhh boy, Ratchet loves them to pieces (although he’d never say it)

They’re quiet, work on their own, and just the right amount of curious! He loves being able to talk with them on calmer days about what he’s working on, and he also likes hearing them talk when they want to share something they’ve learned

So when the two of you get into the worst possible situation out of any that could have been passing through Ratchet’s normally paranoid mind, he wants to stamp on one of his own tools

How in the frag, did the two of you, get stopped by Breakdown and Knockout? Ratchet even took a back road! Not to mention that Ratchet isn’t the best fighter, so now he’s just angry at himself for not training more

Knockout had them in his hands, holding them as if they were some nasty rag, and spoke with his low voice.

“Now, you’re going to give me a relic, or your little pet here is coming with us!”

His charge was not happy with being called a pet and being flung around apparently, because as soon as they were close enough, they sent their fist straight into Knockout’s optic

Ratchet lurched, shoving Breakdown, and transformed around his charge, barreling down the highway, taking notice of the scratches around their wrist

“I didn’t want to hurt him so much..”

Oh Primus they’re gonna break his spark

Ultra Magnus

He never knew how to be around his charge. They were quiet and insecure at times, and he was a strict and set in stone general. How is he going to losen up his militaristic ropes when he’s never had a genuine time to have a softer side?

He really does try to loosen up around them. He speaks with a gentler tone and is generally a pretty nice guy! But he’s got very few interests. He’s taken it upon himself to try to learn more about some of his charge’s interests to make up for it

He takes them on occasional drives to do this. It’s quieter, there’s less people around, and the rolling scenery is always nice.

However, today, a certain spider lady wanted to interrupt the fun when Mags accidentally took a wrong turn. Whoops.

Next thing Magnus knew, you were in her grasp and his charge was being held in what looked to be rather uncomfortable

“Well well well, won’t you two make for some nice trophies? You are just the cutest thing~”

Magnus was shocked silent when his charge whirled around and socked Airachnd in the eye, causing her to drop them as she shrieked

Magnus scrambled to scoop the kid up and run for the hills, transforming around them and calling for a ground bridge

When they were cleared as cleaned up and safe, they were given to Magnus carefully. With teary eyes

“I didn’t mean to break her eye..”

Magnus can’t respond, he doesn’t know how, and the big watery puppy eyes aren’t helping

[trekkiehood]

Impossible Decisions - SPN Fanfic

Title: Impossible Decisions

Fandom: Supernatural

Words: 4.3k

Setting: Brotherhood AU - During S1, "The Benders"

Characters: Caleb, Dean

Ship: None

Ao3 Link

Summary: Caleb has a vision of Dean being tortured by the Benders. When he meets up with the Winchester's, he realizes it's not the physical wounds that need to be mended.

Trigger Warnings: Torture, Mention of Body Horror, Mention of Death, Psychological Horror

Authors Note:

Hey guys!

This fic was unexpected. Not even sure where it came from. I wrote most of it on my plane ride home from college. It came out of nowhere and I had to write it immediately. I meant to post it before now, but I got hung up on a title (still don't love it but hey). It was originally just Caleb having a vision of the Benders and spiraled into... well you'll see lol.

This is based off of Ridley's Brotherhood AU and has multiple references to the cannon series. If you haven't read it, I would highly, highly recommend it!

The first bit in italics is taken straight from the S1 Episode "The Benders"

Supernatural and the Brotherhood are not mine, I'm just playing with them :)

Please enjoy!

It was dark, it took him a moment to realize that his eyes were closed. He groaned with the pounding in his head and was not surprised when the voice was not his own. He'd felt the vision coming on, and since he was alone in a motel room, there was no reason to fight it. Caleb wasn't quite sure who he was viewing this through but when he tried to move, he found himself immobile. He was used to being the monster, but this felt different.

He finally worked his eyes open, his head was pounding, and it was more than the usual side effects of a vision. Someone was in front of him. He felt a spike of panic from whoever he was viewing it from. The emotion was strong, but purposely tampered.

"Come on, let us hunt him." A man, probably in his thirties said, leaning over an older man.

"Yeah, this one's a fighter, sure'd be fun to hunt." Another voice joined in. He was having trouble tracking what was happening.

And for a moment Caleb worried that he was the monster after all. A monster captured by hunters who weren't prepared. Then he found his mouth moving.

"Oh, you got to be kidding me." And Caleb's own emotions threatened to overwhelm. He was viewing it through Deuce. That's why this felt different. It had happened before due to their connection, but it was never pleasant. And never a good thing. "That's what this is about - you yahoos hunt people?"

"You ever killed before?" The oldest of the group said. Dean's vision had cleared some and Caleb could now see there was the old man, two younger men, probably the guys kids, and a little girl.

"Wha-?" The pain and confusion were making it hard to think. Even if it wasn't his own, he was having trouble concentrating through the pain and very obvious concussion. "Well that depends on what you mean."

"I've hunted all my life." The man continued, "Just like my father, his before him. I've hunted deer and bear, I even got a cougar once. But the best hunt is human. Oh there's nothing like it. Holding their life in your hands. Seeing the fear in their eyes just before they go dark. Makes you feel powerful alive."

He was struggling to hear the words, but enough sank through, and he had to work to keep the fear out of his voice. "You're a sick puppy."

The man scoffed, "You give 'em a weapon, give 'em a fighting chance. It's kind of like our tradition passed down father to son." There was confirmation of the family lineage. "Of course, only one or two a year, never enough to bring the law down. Never been that sloppy. "

"Yeah, well don't sell yourself short. You were plenty sloppy." And that was likely what led to being tied to a chair in a house so run down that it made the places the Winchester's normally stayed at look like the Hilton. Looked like Dean had been a bit sloppy too. If John was there, he never would have let them hear the end of it.

"So what? You with that pretty cop. Are you a cop?" Far from it. But Deuce could have gone the cop rout.

"If I tell you, you promise not to make me into an ashtray." He needed to have a conversation with Dean about self-preservation. Then again, he had learned from the master of baiting your captors. And it was a defense mechanism. Dean was in pain and helpless and he didn't do well with either of those circumstances.

The hard punch to the face wasn't unexpected, but he struggled to keep his eyes open. He was already in bad shape, the last thing that he needed was to be knocked around more. Dean shook his head, trying to get his vision to come back and shake away the pain so he could keep his head in the game.

"Only reason I don't let my boys take you right here is that there's something I need to know." Meaning once it was gotten, he was dead. Caleb absently wondered where Sam was.

"Yeah, how bout it's not nice to marry your sister."

"Tell me," The man was losing his patience, "any other cops gonna come looking for you?"

"Eat me. No, no, wait. You actually might." He was biding his time. He knew he was a deadman. The longer he could keep him talking the more likely he'd make it out of there alive.

One of the son's grabbed his face, he grunted. His panic spiked up a notch as they held his head still. A moment later the father was standing over him with a hot poker in his hand. The red hot fire was gleaming in the darkened house.

"You think this is funny? You brought this down on my family. All right. You want to play games? We'll play some games." He addressed the man holding Dean. "Looks like we're gonna have a hunt tonight after all boys." All the fear up to that point was nothing compared to the overwhelming terror that overtook him. "And you," He made eye contact with Dean, "Get to pick the animal. The boy or the cop."

That answered the question of where Sammy was.

"Okay wait, wait, wait. Look nobody's coming for me alright, just us." Fear for Sam would always trump fear for himself.

The man was past negotiating. "You don't choose I will."

The poker came down and the pain in his shoulder was so stark it actually numbed some of the pain in his head. Dean cursed, trying to fight the pain. The poker was readjusted, coming towards his eyes. He could feel the heat and he wanted to close his eyes, but the goon holding him was forcing it open. The panic he felt now, rivaled that of his fear for Sam. If he started crying, he'd blame it on the concussion. He friggin' hated fire. The poker came an inch further, ready to either pluck out or burn through his left eye.

Caleb pulled himself out of it, gasping awake. The pain lingered for a moment, the excruciating pain in his shoulder and the pounding headache. Fear surged, both an after effect of Dean's as well as his own.

He fumbled to get his phone open, feeling his stomach revolt at the images still playing in his head. He dialed Dean and was sent to voicemail. He tried two more times before trying Sam and getting the same. He hadn't gotten an address except hillbilly nation and that could be anywhere.

The only consolation was that his link to both of the boys was strong. They were both alive. Even if nothing else they were both alive.

But Deuce was being tortured, possibly mutilated beyond repair. Caleb lost his battle with his stomach, barely making it to the bathroom and hitting his knees before losing everything he'd eaten in the last day. With one last grasp at hope, he dialed John. Getting his message to call Dean sent a spike of fury through his already pounding head. "I had a vision. If you know where the boys are, call me. Now." He smashed the phone closed, taking a calming breath.

He could always have his dad track them, but they didn't have anything recent of Dean's to use. Dean hadn't been to the farm or to New York in months. Even Bobby hadn't heard from the oldest Winchester boy since Sam had entered the picture. Ever since John officially disappeared, he'd been distant. He couldn't blame the kid. Caleb had been intentionally MIA. He would be there for Deuce if he needed him, but he was busy being overrun by knight duties as well as Tricorp and just John's order to stay out of it in general. It had caused him to check in less and stay away from Dean. It was easier to stay away than to be there but not be allowed to help. Maybe he'd made the wrong decision. He was supposed to protect him. He was the Knight. If the future Guardian got killed it would be on him no matter what his father or Pastor Jim would try to make him to believe.

John had always threatened to pull out of the Brotherhood if he was not allowed to continue his personal hunts, Sam had outright left the Brotherhood, breaking off all contact. Deuce had always loved and thrived in the Brotherhood. But Caleb knew that if Dean was forced to choose between the Brotherhood and his family, his family would always win. Maybe the two sides had finally pulled him too much. Pushed him too far.

None of that mattered right now. What mattered was that Dean was being tortured by the Donner family in some backwoods condemned building and Sam was also captured, possibly about to be hunted like a dog, and that was if they didn't decide to just shoot both of them right there.

His duffel was already packed, had never really been unpacked, and he quickly threw it in his jeep. His initial thought was South. It fit the creepy backwoods vibe.

He was about to pull out of the motel parking lot when he received a test. It was one word.

Minnesota

Looked like John did actually care about the lives of his children. Shocking.

He was about three hours from the border. And if John wasn't going to be more forthcoming than that then he probably didn't know exactly where. Caleb pushed down the fear that he wasn't going to get there fast enough. That he was going to be too late. Walk into a dilapidated kitchen and find the mutilated body of his best friend. If that was the case, he'd kill them. All of them. He might do it anyway.

~SPN~

Caleb had just reached Minnesota and was wondering where to go from there. Both Dean and Sam were still alive. That was about all he could say for them. He was hoping that as he got closer the link would get stronger and he could tell how much pain Dean was in. He wasn't sure when the vision took place. Dean had already been captured in the vision and he was already roughed up at that point. Who knew what had happened before then. But it wasn't like Dean to not answer his phone. John? More chances of him not than answering. Sam? About a fifty-fifty shot. Deuce? If he didn't answer, there was a problem.

He'd now called Dean ten times and left five messages. If Dean was able to get to his phone he would have.

No matter how hard he tried or reassured himself that Dean's link was still strong, he couldn't get the mental image of a bloodied corpse out of his mind. A partially burned body, one eye socket empty and the other a pained filled glassy eye forever frozen in death. Blood dripped from the mouth, nose, and ears. It was gruesome and gory and definitely not going to happen. Ever.

Deuce hated fire. He hated fire almost as much as Caleb hated water. Crazy how watching one or both of your parents die had a habit of ruining the elements involved. Seeing and feeling Deuce be burned, tortured, brought back memories of a wide-eyed and sick ten-year-old trying to hold it together while Griffin Porter used him to get information out of Caleb. And this was even more extensive. If Dean was even half as bad as he feared, he'd kill the old man real slow and make his son's watch.

Caleb's phone lit up and he almost ignored it until he saw who was calling. Feeling a mix of terror and hope he flipped it open.

"Deuce?!"

"We're okay." He sounded weak and tired, Caleb could feel some of the pain now that he was more strongly connected, but it didn't matter right now. Dean was alive and apparently not missing any body parts. Winchester's might be stoic, but even in the book of John Winchester, missing body parts warranted a reaction.

"Thank God." Was all he was able to muster, letting his head hit the back of the driver's seat with a thump.

"Sorry we just now got back in cell range… I take it you had a vision…" His voice was hesitant, "What exactly did you see?"

Caleb let out a small huff, "Let's just say I'm taking it on faith that you wouldn't be this calm unless you had both of your eyes."

"Yeah," Dean just sounded tired, but he tried to offer a laugh. "Yeah."

"Deuce?"

"I've got to go, I don't know if the cops will be actively looking for me or not but considering I'm legally dead I don't want to take the chance." Caleb absently wondered if the cop mentioned in his vision had died. If Dean had chosen her death over Sam's, it would explain his desire to get out of town.

"Where are you?"

"Look man, I appreciate it but we can take care of ourselves."

"I'm already in Minnesota. Where are you?" He needed to see Dean with his own two eyes. He needed to see what damage was actually done, how far the psychopaths had gotten.

Dean sighed, and Caleb could practically see the younger man rubbing a hand over his face. "We're in Hibbing right now, but we're heading out. We don't have a place in mind, just… away from here."

"Meet me in Duluth?"

"Yeah, okay, I'll see you, Damian."

"Deuce-" He cut in before Dean could hang up. "You did what you had to do, okay? Sammy's alive and that's all that really matters."

Dean's guilt and grief swept over him so strong that Caleb almost jerked the car off the road. "Yeah." His voice was quiet. "Yeah, he's okay. We'll be there soon."

This time Dean did hang up. Caleb was even stronger in his resolve to meet up with his best friend. Something was definitely wrong.

~SPN~

Caleb reached the motel first, he was tempted to check into one of the nicer hotels, but unsure of what shape the boys would be in, decided to go with one of their typical, run-down ones.

He texted Dean the address, getting a simple "k" as a response.

When the impala pulled into the parking lot, Caleb frowned to see Sam driving. Deuce rarely gave up the keys to his baby. He remembered the mild concussion he felt during the vision and wondered just how bad Dean had to be feeling to willingly sit on the passenger side. Dean shouldered his bag before slowly walking towards the room. Sam hung back, watching.

Caleb opened the door as his friend was reaching it. "Deuce." He nodded, letting the younger man in.

"Damian." His voice was even weaker in person. He pushed past Caleb, keeping his back to the older man. "You get us a separate room or is one of us sleeping in the impala?"

Caleb appreciated his attempt at levity when he clearly didn't feel like it. "I was thinking the Runt could sleep on the pull out. Save us some money."

"Since when are you concerned about money?" Sam rolled his eyes, entering the room. "You just thrive on making my life miserable."

Caleb smiled, "Well when you put it that way." Sam was concerned. He wasn't even trying to shield it. The joking was forced and uncomfortable. True to their normal banter but without the normal lightheartedness.

Dean was another story. He had his shields up and reinforced. Not much was getting through except an occasional wave of pain that he was quick to tamper. Emotionally he seemed almost dead. All locked up. He'd probably let Sam drive just so that he could work to pull his walls up on the ride over.

"Speaking of making your life miserable, how 'bout you go on a food run."

Sam raised his eyebrows, "You paying?"

Caleb rolled his eyes, pulling out his wallet and handing him a fifty. "I expect change, Runt."

"I'll be sure to save some pennies for you."

Sam's eyes flickered over to Dean, and he gave a pleading look. Caleb nodded. Sam started towards the door, but Dean's voice stopped him.

"No, I can go, you two stay here."

"Really Deuce? You look like death warmed over."

Dean rolled his eyes, "No one asked you to come here, Damian."

"Yeah, well too bad. I'm here, and I want food, and as already pointed out it's my job to make the Runt's life miserable." He nodded to Sam who offered a sheepish smile to his brother before leaving.

"I could have gone." Dean grumbled, glancing at the door.

"Yeah, well, the kid could use some time away."

"I think he's had enough of that." Dean mumbled. Caleb wasn't sure if he was referring to Sam's time at Stanford or something else. He cleared his throat.

"So you want to tell me what happened out there?" Caleb asked, wincing as the words came out a little too much like John Winchester.

"Monsters I get, people are crazy." Was the cryptic answer.

"So we are looking at 100% humans?"

"There's no we in this Damian. Everything's taken care of."

"So they're dead?"

Dean turned, his eyes darkening, "They're human Caleb."

"If what I saw was anything to go off of, barely."

Dean grunted in response, turning back to his bag. In the brief second Dean had turned to him, he'd seen the bruising on his face. The bleeding had stopped, and had likely been cleaned by either Dean or Sam. Even turned around though, it wasn't hard to miss the way Dean was holding his left arm. The arm that the father had burned in his vision.

"You let Sam clean the burn?"

Dean turned back; face set blankly. "What burn?"

"Come on Deuce, freaky visions, remember?"

"I'm fine."

"Yeah, sure felt fine when your skin was being melted off. Distracted from the concussion at least."

Dean glared at him, and Caleb thought he was going to actually fight him on this. But Dean sighed, sitting down on the bed. "How much did you see? I know you said… but how far did it go?" The walls were breaking down and the fear, and anger, and pain, and most staunchly, the guilt nearly caused the psychic to physically react.

"That was it. Started when you woke up tied to the chair and ended as the poker was coming up towards your eye."

Dean ran a hand over his face, "I'm guessing it was from my point of view."

Caleb nodded. Dean sighed.

"I assume you brought your own first aid kit. Ours needs restocked."

Caleb took it as the concession it was. As he went to grab his Dr. Ames approved medical kit, Dean began working his shirt off. It was painfully slow, but Caleb knew better than to offer assistance.

There was a white bandage over the skin, but Caleb could already see the swelling. He began to peel away the bandage, causing Dean to hiss.

"Come on Damian, I thought you wanted to try to fix my burn, not tear my skin off."

"Looks like you did a good job of ruining your skin yourself. This is definitely infected."

"Don't overreact. It's only been a couple of hours."

"Well, I'm looking at it and it's definitely not okay looking. I doubt the Donner's sterilized their fire pokers."

"Benders. And it was on fire, shouldn't that make it sterile enough?"

"Don't let my father here you talk like that, or you'll be stuck listening to a speech on proper triage etiquette. Benders?"

"Yeah, the family. Psychopaths, all of them. They kidnapped people then let them escape so they could hunt them. It was sick."

"So, you didn't kill them?"

Dean sighed, closing his eyes as Caleb worked to clean out the wound. "Kathleen killed the old man. Said he was trying to escape. Don't believe her for a second. He killed her brother."

They both knew had either Sam or Dean died, no one would have been left alive.

"Who's Kathleen?" Talking was good. Silence was not.

"A cop. Let's just say she wanted to find out why people were disappearing as much as I did." There went the cop's death theory. Dean wouldn't feel guilty about the old man's death, right?

"And how did you get mixed up in a family full of serial killers?"

"They took Sammy." Well, there was a valid reason for guilt.

"What?! Why didn't you call man? I could have helped find him! Or Mac-"

"By the time Mac would have gotten down here it wouldn't have mattered. He was gone for less than twenty-four hours."

"And me?"

"You haven't exactly been the most available guy, dude. And you would have talked to Mac who would have called Jim who would have called Dad…" His voice trailed.

And Caleb realized what this was really about. Dean had lost Sam. Like in Flagstaff. Like in that diner when he was a kid. John would have been ticked.

"Johnny's not the easiest person to reach right now, Deuce."

"Still would have been ticked." Great, now Dean was reading his mind.

"It's not your fault. He's an adult. You can't always watch out for him."

Dean's voice was quiet when he spoke again, "That's not the worst thing I did."

They were finally getting to the root of the problem. He taped the piece of gauze over the wound. "I'll need to look at it again tomorrow to make sure it doesn't get worse. And as for whatever you think you did, you're both alive so it can't be all that bad."

Dean gave him a look saying that he clearly disagreed. "I told them to kill Sam."

And Caleb didn't know how to respond to that. Of all the things he thought Dean would say, that wasn't even on the list. "What?" he said dumbly.

"They asked me to choose. Sam or Kathleen. I told them to hunt Sam."

"Deuce-"

"What kind of a brother am I?" He stood up, running his good hand through his hair. "How could I let them hunt Sam like that?!"

"It was the most logical choice, Deuce." And he wasn't just trying to comfort his friend. They had been trained to save innocents. That's what Dean had been trying to do. "Sam is a trained Hunter. Not just a normal hunter either, he's a member of the Brotherhood. He could have easily evaded them. Clearly, he did."

Dean snorted, "Yeah well that's not exactly what they had in mind."

Caleb's eyes darkened, rising to meet his friend. He hadn't noticed any marks on Sam, but he hadn't exactly been looking. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"He told them to shoot him in the cage. Both of them. He wanted me to make a decision just to make one and I chose wrong!"

"Deuce, hey, it's not like that. They put you in an impossible position. You made the best decision you could with the information you were given."

"How could you say that?!" Dean was worked up, dangerously worked up. "I almost let them kill him!"

"Dean they had you tied to a chair while they tortured you! I don't think that's letting it happen!"

"But they made me choose-"

"And it didn't matter! Get that through your thick skull! It didn't matter who you chose! He always planned to kill them both! They were trying to break you the best way they knew how, and you can't let them win, okay? You can't let them break you!"

"I'm not broken!" He snapped.

Caleb deflated, dropping back to the bed. "I know you're not. You're the strongest person I know, Deuce. But you can't let this eat at you. Everyone's okay and that's what you need to focus on. You never had any control over the situation. You were trying to protect innocents. It's what you've been trained to do."

"I've been trained to look out for Sammy."

"And maybe you're finally starting to realize that Sam can take care of himself."

Dean sank down beside his friend. He let out a sigh. "He grew up at college. Even more than I realized."

"Yeah," he answered back quietly, "He did."

"Dad would be proud of him."

Caleb felt something lodge in his throat, "He'd be proud of you too, Deuce. He is proud of you. And once this whole mess is done, he'll come back and tell both of you."

"Yeah," Dean cleared his throat, "well if this overwhelmingly girly chick-flick moment is over, I haven't slept in two days."

"Probably because you have a concussion."

Dean rolled his eyes, "Fine, then you can do the honors of waking me up when the food gets here."

"Only so long as you don't stab me again."

"Dude, that was one time. And it was your fault. You know to watch the hands."

"Whatever dude. Go to sleep."

"Stop acting like a girl and I will."

Caleb rolled his eyes. "Goodnight Deana."

Dean sank down into the ratty mattress, grumbling something that would have had Jim fetching the soap. The young man's eyes were falling shut before his head hit the pillow.

Caleb remained silent for a moment, seeing what he could glean from his best friend without blatantly disregarding his privacy. The guilt was still there but not as overpowering as before. The mental image of Dean tortured beyond recognition was still burned in the older hunter's mind. But it was okay. Yes, Dean felt some undue guilt, but he'd get over it. Sam was fine. Dean had made sure of it. And Dean, he would be fine too. Caleb would make sure of it.

~TH~

I hope you enjoyed that! Would LOVE to know what you think!

I definitely have some more ideas for Brotherhood fics and hopefully I'll have some time over the break to write them!

Please let me know what you thought!

Merry Christmas and God bless,

Jamie

[onebadwinter]

The Joker Tropes Part 2

Taken From Here and here

Nether Realm Studios especially seems to love making Joker out to be evil incarnate. In Injustice: Gods Among Us and its sequel, he loses all his cred (and life) once he nukes Metropolis; Harley ditches him entirely, Batman just completely gives up on indulging him any more, even Guest Fighters like Hellboy consider him worthless, and non-Batvillains such as Grodd and Brainiac and even Darkseid loathe him for either Metropolis, or just in general principle. Mortal Kombat 11 shows that even the MK cast see him as a scourge upon the realms, and also express distaste toward him for either his nuking, a previous outing, or because he's seen as a buffoon who cannot be taken seriously (this is usually the case for other villain characters).

About the only person who can tolerate him for long is Lex Luthor, only because they both have the same level of hatred for their respective enemies. Even then, Luthor prefers to keep his distance from the Joker, if only because a bored Joker screws with everything For the Evulz.

In the animated series, he claims to have been beaten as a child when interviewed by Harley Quinn. It is unknown if this is true. According to Batman, he's simply making it up.

In one issue of New 52, he claims to have been driven insane by an abusive grandmother, who also bleached his skin to its present pallor.

In the same continuity, he is one to a baby gorilla he adopts, trains up as a gun-wielding henchman, and ultimately gets killed off for laughs.

In the comic book adaptation of Injustice, it's implied Harley fears Joker would be one, and gives their daughter to her sister, lest he kill the child. It's left ambiguous whether the Joker's even aware of the ruse.

Averted in one story, wherein one of Arkham's doctors realizes Joker's faking insanity just to piss off Batman as revenge for his disfigurement. Another doctor finds the report and excitedly reveals it to the current head doctor, only to learn that  the Joker left it for everyone to read, since the paper's written by Harley Quinn, and therefore worthless as evidence.

In Batman: The Man Who Laughs, it's established that the name "The Joker" was given to him by the media, and he liked it so much that he decided to call himself that.

The same happens in Joker (2019), where Murray tells the audience to "look at this joker" when talking about Arthur. Arthur took it to heart.

Batman: Arkham Knight takes this even further by revealing that being forgotten is the only thing the Joker truly fears.

Just to demonstrate how much disregard he has for his henchmen, a reoccurring motivation for offing his own lackeys is failing to laugh at one of his jokes. Or laughing too late. Or laughing for too long. Or laughing at the wrong joke. He's... unpredictable.

The Joker loves it when people laugh with him, whether genuine or not, but if someone laughs at him, they're most likely already dead.

Joker loves attention and being above the normals, so never imply that he's not interesting or unique. Terry exploits this flaw in Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker just to drive him to a Villainous Breakdown.

The Batman Who Laughs. Since the character's first appearance in Dark Nights: Metal, the mere mention of him is enough to put The Joker in an uncharacteristically un-jolly mood and is a good way to get on his bad side. In fact, the dislike of this twisted version of his archnemesis is so great, that when Lex Luthor and The Legion of Doom started cooperating with him against Joker's protests, he quit the legion (after non-lethally jokerizing every other member of it) in disgust.

If you're going to hurt Batman, do it right. One of the supplementary stories for Joker War had him beyond furious with Bane - to the point of promising him he'd kill him in a way he would never see coming - for showing so little imagination in killing Alfred in City of Bane without even letting Batman listen to it to torture him. By his reckoning, if you have a great gag to break the Bat, use it to break the Bat - don't blow it by having Robin be the only one to witness it.

Originally Conrad Veidt from The Man Who Laughs.

Later portrayals base themselves on his actors, with Cesar Romero a popular candidate, and after Jack Nicholson came in, artists such as Alex Ross base him on him, such as the actor's distinct widow's peak and slicked back hair.

During Knightfall he and Scarecrow killed several members of a SWAT team, and one of his last actions in Batman: No Man's Land was to kill Commissioner Gordon's second wife, Lt. Sarah Essen.

One of the alternate realities seen in Zero Hour! was one where he killed Commissioner Gordon instead of crippling Barbara.

Part of the reason Gordon takes over the post of Commissioner in both The Dark Knight Trilogy and Batman: Arkham Series is due to the Joker killing Gillian Loeb. Additionally, the first game in the latter series, Asylum, he sees several of Arkham's guards killed by him and his men.

He's holding a dead cop's corpse in his intro in Injustice: Gods Among Us and using it as a puppet. He also talks to the body of one of the Regime enforcers who captured him once he breaks out and heads to Gotham.

Whether he was driven insane or was already insane and became completely bonkers.

Where he is on the spectrum between "wacky prankster" and "utterly depraved and sadistic sociopath and murderer".

Whether he is a senseless, performative terrorist wreaking havoc for kicks or a deceptively cunning and competent criminal mastermind. Or both. Usually both.

He's no Batman, but sometimes he is a proficient hand-to-hand combatant, Knife Nut or marksman, and other times a flimsy wimp who goes down in one punch. In some of the grittier settings, his raw strength, numbness to pain and viciousness are enough to level the playing field with Batman.

Whether he actually loves Harley Quinn varies. In the animated series, (where Harley first appeared) the writers haveoutright said he's a sociopath incapable of loving anyone, and just sees her as a useful mook. Some other works imply he really does love her on some level (although he's usually still an abusive asshole.)

He can either be Faux Affably Evil, Laughably Evil, just a Monster Clown, or some combination of the three.

At least one such incident implied he would be interested in Batman... but only after he was dead. Again this may only have been a tactic to get under Batman's skin or truthful admission. The readers will never know for certain.

His plot in The Killing Joke is to put Jim Gordon through the wringer hard in the hopes of driving him mad. He'll also try to drive Batman over the edge (particularly, drive him to break his "no killing" rule), sometimes by cutting off all of Batsy's human connections.

The Dark Knight reworks it into Driving Gotham To Senseless Violence with wanton acts of destruction or terrorism, just to prove everyone's as bad as him deep down.

Ironically, a 1952 story has the Joker get himself falsely committed to an insane asylum, to question a patient who knew the location of a cache of money. The end of the story has him Laughing Mad due to a prank Batman used to disguise his identity.

He didn't have his signature laugh. This seems to have been a way to "goofy up" the character to make him less terrifying in the days of the Comics Code Authority. Later on, he'd learn to giggle while remaining terrifying.

He actually committed crimes for moneynote , and wasn't really interested in causing chaos or terror for a joke's sake.

Building off of that, his plans weren't really "insane" until the Silver Age (at which point it's not even fair to say this was exclusive to him), nor was there any question of the character's mental stability.

His obsession with Batman wasn't there, much less the idea that he would pass up chances to kill the Bat or learn his identity. This aspect was probably introduced to explain the Bond Villain Stupidity he (and every Batman villain) had become infamous for in the Silver Age.

His clown-like complexion was actually makeup in his early appearances. He even removed his makeup to disguise himself as a cop, which was referenced in The Dark Knight. It's later revealed that the look is permanent after falling in a vat of chemicals.

The Brave and the Bold #111 and #191 have him team up with Batman to clear his name after being framed for several murders. The first instance turned out to simply be a framing the guilty part occasion but the second instance was actually genuine on Joker's part (except the person Joker seemingly murdered turned out to be faking their death).

He also does this with Batman whenever The Batman Who Laughs is involved (specifically in the Dark Knights: Metal series).

He abruptly ends a partnership with Red Skull when his Nazi affiliation comes out. Red Skull simply wonders why he is so surprised when he thinks that the Joker would make a great Nazi. The Joker is NOT happy about this, proclaiming "I may be a criminal lunatic, but I'm an American criminal lunatic!" It even provides the trope's image. And yes, folks, even an equal-opportunity murderer like the Joker despises the Nazis!note

The exception is mentioned again in the Last Laugh arc where the Joker immediately refused to join the American Neo-Nazi Aryan Alliance group in the Slab after he was offered membership. Joker: I'm evil and all that, but you guys are just plain mean.

Will not harm dumb animals and doesn't condone it. There's no humor to be had in that. Higher primates apparently do not qualify but a lot more effort went into that one.

While in Arkham with villain Warren White, AKA the Great White Shark, Joker calls him the worst person he ever met. He states that while he may kill people, even he doesn't steal their kids' college funds.

Sees nothing funny about someone parking in a handicap spot when they're not handicapped. However, he does think it's hilarious to hurt them in ways that will make certain they'll always be able to park there.

A girl named Janey Bennett, whose class was studying criminal behavior, became pen pals with the Joker while he was in Arkham. When Janey revealed that her father, the mayor of Motor City, was abusing her (exactly how isn't specified, though it was implied to have been really bad) the Joker broke out and, convinced that the authorities would be of no help, tried to force the mayor into admitting to his crimes and giving him Janey (so that he could find a better home for her) by threatening to contaminate the city's blood supply, going through with it (because the ends justify the means) when the mayor refused to give in to his demands. He originally intended to give her to Batman as well so he could protect her but at the end decided to give her to her mom. Joker: I mean, stealing a city blind is something I can admire... but being mean to one's own daughter... that just makes my blood boil.

For a rather literal form of "standard", the Joker's team-up with Carnage in Spider-Man and Batman: Disordered Minds fell apart in part because the Joker, known for his love of theatrics, found Kasady's desire to get straight to killing boring. Conversely, Kasady didn't like the Joker's flair for theatrics.

The Joker absolutely loathes The Batman Who Laughs, to the point where he drops his usual joking demeanor and is deathly serious whenever directly referring to him, even willing to work together with Batman to face him when it comes down to it. When Lex Luthor goes behind his back to make a deal with The Batman Who Laughs (going against the only condition Joker has for joining his plan), Joker responds by Joker-gassing the Legion of Doom, putting Lex into a series of deathtraps, trashing Lex's Power Armor, and quitting the Legion. In the process, he tells Luthor how he had planned on ruining the Legion utterly on the verge of victory, and as nightmarish as his plan sounded, he claims it is nothing compared to what the Batman Who Laughs is going to do.

While he still gloated about it and found Commissioner Gordon kneecapping him funny after remember that he'd crippled Barbara, the actual act of killing Sarah Essen in the penultimate issue of Batman: No Man's Land is one of the few times the Joker wasn't happy with something he himself did, considering he's seen walking away while scowling afterward, leaves the babies he originally planned to murder unharmed and immediately turns himself in to the police.

Emperor Joker sees the Joker disgusted with a corrupted Jimmy O Lsen tormenting the Superfamily and Batman when they're turned int animals.

Later one he is disgusted when his minions vandalize the Moai on Eastern Island.

Again, when he rescues Lex from The Batman Who Laugh's infected minions in Hell Arisen, the mere mention of his alternate universe rival prompts him to have a very uncharacteristic Freak Out. The Joker: I told you. I told you not to deal with him. You should have shot that thing in the head the second you had it in a cage! It is wrong. It is a wrong thing.

Played more straight in his relationship with Punchline. Only time will tell if it lasts.

There’s also a comic storyline when Hush informed that a dirty cop Office Halmet killed his wife Jeannie. The Joker wanted nothing more than to kill said cop in revenge. Then there’s Batman: Three Jokers where, despite it being being heavily implied he was abusive, the “Comedian” Joker is seen setting up fake tea parties with dolls, clearly trying to substitute them for his wife and child showing that he does miss them and desire to be a family with them.

While The Dark Knight is one of the few times the Joker's clown-like appearance is the result of make-up, he does sport a Glasgow Grin.

While Joker still has the permanent clown look, it's combined with the Glasgow Grin.

While Batman: Endgame would see the skin of his face restored with a chemical called Dionesiumnote , at the start of The New 52, the Joker had the Dollmaker skin his face and then, after he recovered it, spent Death of the Family wearing it like a Leatherface-esque mask. And even in Endgame, his restored face ends up badly burned as the result of the finale battle between him and Batman, though it still ends up restored again.

Gotham sees neither Valeska escape this. After his death in season 2, Jerome (the proto-Joker) ends up resurrected in season 3, but because Dwight thinks his attempt to revive him failed, Dwight ends up cutting off Jerome's face ala Death of the Family and Jerome ends up stapling it on when he catches up with Dwight and while he later has it properly reattached, there's still scars from what happened. Jeremiah, Jerome's twin and the show's true Joker, ends up with the "perma-clown" appearance due to Jerome having the Scarecrow brew something up to spray in Jeremiah's face, but season 5 sees his fateful fall at Ace Chemicals badly scar his face and sear off most of his hair with only stringy patches left.

Averted entirely in Joker (2019), where his clown appearance is entirely makeup, and the worst it gets is painting his iconic smile on his face with his own blood from a car crash. Not even a Glasgow Grin or anything, the blood is from his hand and his face only has a few normal cuts on it.

While Batman is a rather serious character who refuses to kill anyone, The Joker is a rather comical character who revels in death.

Joker's gadgets tend to be rather goofier but much more lethal, such as the Joker Venom that he often uses to kill his victims.

While Batman gets along well with his sidekicks Robin and Batgirl, Joker frequently abuses his sidekick Harley Quinn and has tried to kill her before, not to mention all the times he has been a Bad Boss by killing his henchmen for any reason you can think of, sometimes for no reason at all.

While Batman's backstory is well known, even by the citizens of Gotham who know of the tragedy of the rich Waynes' in Crime Alley, no one knows anything about the Joker's backstory, but most versions he tells are consistent in two things: he was a nobody, and possibly someone poor.

In most adaptations, his voice is high-pitched in contrast to Batman's Badass Baritone.

Why he went by the name the Red Hood has changed over the years: The Killing Joke claims he was a failed comedian driven to crime to support his pregnant wife. The trauma of his disfigurement from jumping in the acid and his wife's earlier accidental death drove him insane. However, even this backstory is questionable, as the Joker himself calls it "multiple choice".

In Injustice 2, an intro with Atrocitus has the Red Lantern wondering what drove the Joker to nihilism.

In the animated series, he claims to have been abused as a child when interviewed by Harley, but according to Batman, it's just another ruse to escape Arkham.

The purple suit and matching pants with either an orange and/or green shirt with a bowtie or tie, remains the definitive Joker look one that many artists and costume designers have given spin on. He is sometimes known for wearing a cool hat but other times goes hatless. Heath Ledger's custom-designed purple long-coat, trousers, blue shirt and green Waistcoat of Style with a tie has likewise become iconic and famous for its contemporary and downright stylish update on the classic look.

The original Red Hood outfit which is a black suit, white shirt, bowtie with an opera cap and a bizarre red dome is also quite famous.

The Hawaiian tourist outfit he wore in the notorious scene in The Killing Joke.

The white suit he wears in Miller's The Dark Knight Returns as well as the white nurse maid outfit with red wig in The Dark Knight is also quite notable.

The Future Joker look from Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker which went with a mime look (black body suit, slicked-back hair) is also quite distinct and unique.

The first issue of Batman with Joker's debut has him described as having "burning, hate-filled eyes" and the moniker, "the harliquin of hate".

The Man Who Laughs had Bruce dosed with a light version of the Joker Venom and he felt his perspective shift into a paranoid vengeance were he felt everyone deserved to be punished for his parent's death just for existing.

Death of the Family had Batman describe how Joker's irises are always narrow when looking at anyone but Batman and that it is usually an indication of negative feelings toward something with Bruce mentioning that his eye are the eyes of someone who hates everything he sees.

In the Justice League storyline "Rock of Ages", Martian Manhunter has to put in incredible effort to reorganize Joker's mind long enough for him to give up the cataclysmic Philosopher's Stone. The briefly sane Joker immediately says My God, What Have I Done? verbatim as he hands it back, before quickly losing his mind and going back to the laughing madman.

The famous example from the end of The Killing Joke, where Batman tries to convince him to allow Batman to rehabilitate him before their vendetta kills them. Joker considers it for a long, somber moment before quietly reflecting that they're both too far gone.

Batman: Cacophony ends with Joker being pumped full of an inhuman amount of antipsychotic drugs to keep him under control while in recovery from a near-fatal stabbing. Batman takes the opportunity to have a relatively-sane conversation with him, though it's somewhat subverted by Joker still being a homicidal sociopath even while heavily sedated.

He even gives multiple reasons on how he came Back from the Dead in Injustice 2 and will go along with whatever his opponent thinks is true, despite being Dead All Along in story mode and only appearing as a hallucination to his ex-moll.

Batman: The Dark Knight Returns sees him kill David Endochrine and Ruth Weisenheimer, who were clearly based on David Letterman and Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

During Knightfall, once he realizes that Azrael isn't Batman, his plan's gone to hell, and one too many criticisms from Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert stand-ins, he kills the stand-ins.

In one of the issues for the The Batman tie-in comic, The Batman Strikes, he terrorizes a stand-in for Conan O'Brien. This becomes darkly Hilarious in Hindsight as the real O'Brien voiced Endochrine in the animated version of Batman: The Dark Knight Returns. In the series proper, Harley's debut had the two of them terrorize a stand-in for Dr. Phil for the climax.

If you want to know how truly terrifying The Batman Who Laughs is, look no further than the way Joker acts whenever discussing him. He doesn't laugh, he doesn't smile. He becomes calm and serious and simply tells whomever he's talking to that the TBWL is "a wrong thing that shouldn't exist". Someone HAS to be scary if the very thought of him makes Joker act like a calm rational sane person.

In Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker, the clown has a massive Villainous Breakdown when Terry mocks him for his failed attempts to break Batman.

On the rare occasion Joker gets bored and leaves Gotham, expect everyone to think of him as just a silly clown, until the bodies start piling up.

One issue of the Robin Series had him talking about having Abusive Parents, only for a psychiatrist to tell him it's the seventh story he's told now.

Batman lampshades on this to Harley in the animated series, thinking it's another lie to gain sympathy.

The Killing Joke claims he was a failed comedian driven to crime to support his pregnant wife. The trauma of his disfigurement and his wife's earlier accidental death drove him mad. However, even this could be a lie, as he himself calls it "multiple choice".

It's even discussed in Injustice 2, as Atrocitus wonders what drove the Joker to nihilism. Despite only appearing as a hallucination to Harley in story mode, he spews out multiple theories for his Unexplained Recovery and will say Sure, Let's Go with That in non-canon fights. Was he resurrected by someone, or is he from another universe? Did he escape from either the Source Wall or the Phantom Zone, or is he just an apparition?

Shadow of the Bat #38, Tears of a Clown: He celebrates his anniversary of the day he was a still sane, but hapless comedian, and was thrown out of an exclusive Stand-Up Comedy club for an unfunny act the patrons mercilessly heckled. It was the last straw as he agreed to provide to his family by pulling a job for the Red Hood gang. So he kidnaps all the patrons and reenacts his act with control collars that will kill them when they laugh. Oddly enough, the patrons are hardcore Stand-Up Comedy fans, so they can't remember the number of times they've booed someone. However, even this origin story could be a lie.

It's come to be his primary disfigurement over the original skin bleaching.

In Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker, Terry McGinnis exploits this by delivering an epic Boring Insult so the clown will have a Villainous Breakdown.

King Barlowe proved to be a big one in his Thanatos Gambit in the episode "Joker's Millions" of The New Batman Adventures. In a spiteful Video Will, he gives the clown his millions, revealing in his tape that most of it was fake. Expecting the clown to splurge on it, he won't have enough to pay off the IRS, allowing Barlowe to get the "last laugh" after his death, without the Joker coming after him.

Alan Moore's "I go Loony" from The Killing Joke, an in-panel song-and-dance tune that was eventually made into an actual song belted out in Batman: The Killing Joke.

Batman: The Brave and the Bold has "Where's the Fun in That?" from the episode "Emperor Joker".

Batman: Arkham City ended with him covering The Platters' "Only You (and You Alone)", Batman: Arkham Origins had him cover Hank Williams' "Cold, Cold, Heart" and Batman: Arkham Knight had him provide an original composition, "Can't Stop Laughing".

Action Fashionista: This incarnation of the Joker has a wide variety of garish outfits for every occassion — most of them straight from the comics.

Adaptational Attractiveness: Metal teeth, lack of eyebrows, and tattoos aside, he's still being played by the youthful-looking real life Pretty Boy Jared Leto; especially since the last two cinematic Jokers were a creepy middle-aged gangster with a botched face-lift and a filthy, scarred vagrant (even the mentally unwell clown-for-hire doesn't scream Mr. Fanservice one bit). This version looks more like Marilyn Manson.

Adaptational Nice Guy: A very downplayed example. While he's otherwise the same Clown Prince of Crime we all know and love to hate, he appears to genuinely care for Harley, and even throws her out of a falling helicopter to save her life. Almost any other iteration of the Joker would do that to save his own skin or rid himself of her.

Adaptational Skimpiness: This version of the Joker tends to be shirtless a lot more than he has in any other medium. It mostly seems like an opportunity to show off his tattoos.

Adaptation Distillation: Leto's Joker seems to be less of the "evil philosopher" that Heath Ledger portrayed him as in The Dark Knight, and instead seems to be a cross between the garish, larger-than-life Mark Hamill version from the animated series and the Arkham games, and the creepy, deeply twisted Brian Azzarello version. David Ayer had also stated that he looked specifically to the Golden Age Joker for reference, providing reason for many to believe that Leto's Joker is a modern re-imagining of that incarnation.

Advertised Extra: Heavily featured in Suicide Squad promotional materials, barely appears in the film for more than seven minutes. According to Jared Leto, several of the scenes he shot were not included in the theatrical cut.

Ambiguous Disorder: In Suicide Squad, most of the time the Joker seems... not all there compared to Harley. In addition of psychopathic tendencies, the Joker has random bouts of maniacal laughter, confusion, and slurred speech-like patterns. All attributes that stem from punch-drunk syndrome. Considering he has faced Batman one too many times, it makes sense that the Joker's mental stability is finally catching up to him.

However, come Birds of Prey, they broke up, mirroring the comics where they do have an Relationship Revolving Door. It appears to stick, as Harley publicly calls it quits between the two of them.

His tattoos are very reminiscent of the Joker in All Star Batman and Robin.

Ax-Crazy: Like all the incarnations before him, calling him a violent psychopath is one of the biggest understatements you can make.

Bedlam House: Spent some time at Arkham Asylum, where he met Harley. Then he broke free from it with the help of both Harley and his gang.

Chewing the Scenery: An important part of the character is his theatricality.

Cool Car: A bright purple sports car with underglow lights and a "HAHAHA" license plate.

Dented Iron: It's subtle, but the numerous scars on his body and metal replacement teeth in his mouth are clear signs that his frequent run-ins with Batman are taking their toll.

Disney Death: He seemingly dies in the crash of his helicopter... only to come back to free Harley from her high security prison at the end of Suicide Squad.

The Dreaded: In true Joker fashion, everyone is terrified of him.

Establishing Character Moment: One that takes place before he even makes his official debut in the setting - he killed Robin (a minor) and vandalized his outfit to mock Batman over his inability to save him.

Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Insofar as much as the Joker can love anyone, anyway, but he does seem to genuinely care about Harley. Eventually, subverted.

Evil Has a Bad Sense of Humor: He considers the brutal murder of a minor as a joke he played on Batman. When he's torturing Harleen Quinzel, he promises not to shatter her well-kept teeth while flashing his own hideous metal dentures. When Harleen later has him at gunpoint, Joker just says "please don't kill me, I'll be ya friend" in a snarky tone.

Evil Is Hammy: It's not The Joker if he's not Chewing the Scenery. And, sure enough, he does.

Evil Is Petty: The graffiti on Robin's costume seems to imply that Joker murdered him just to prod at Batman. It is confirmed in Suicide Squad that Joker and Harley killed him.

Evil Laugh: It's kind of his thing. One notable example is when he chuckles while surrounded by an arsenal of weapons.

Fake Shemp: Indie rocker Johnny Goth stood in for Jared Leto in Birds of Prey, in the flashback where he and Harley torture and tattoo the big mafia thug Harley later bumps back into.

Foil: To Batman as usual, but with some new additions. After 20 years, Batman became more jaded and cruel, while the Joker somewhat mellowed out and his criminal activity became more professional. Batman didn't settle down until the death of Superman while the Joker grew attached to Harley Quinn.

In Suicide Squad Griggs' smug indifference about his gambling debt immediately becomes pure terror when he realizes the Joker has gotten involved.

He is so feared that even the likes of Black Mask would rather steer clear of him. Harley's enemies only start gunning for her in Birds of Prey when it's become clear that she's no longer with him.

   G-Y

The Ghost:

There is an allusion to him in Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice ("HA HA HA Joke's On You, Batman" painted across the chest of the dead Robin's empty suit in the Batcave), but he doesn't actually appear.

He gets mentioned a lot in Birds of Prey, but he's only seen very briefly in some flashbacks, always from the back (including footage from Suicide Squad). There is a whole Deleted Scene where he and Harley have a domestic dispute. Harley leaves the house through the window and the Joker throws her stuffed beaver out through the window. In the film proper, she's just kicked out of the house, with no shot of Mr. J.

Greater-Scope Villain: His role in Batman v Superman. Despite not actually appearing his murder of Robin by this point has driven Batman down a darker, more vengeful path that goes against Batman's traditional moral code; the one that the Joker is always trying to prove is wrong. Batman's rage towards Superman blinds him to the possibility of Lex Luthor being the real threat long enough for Superman to die fighting Doomsday. In a way the Joker's actions contributed to Batman's failure.

Guttural Growler: This Joker is noticeably more snarly than previous incarnations.

Handshake Refusal: He doesn't like to shake hands, as Monster T finds out.

Hell-Bent for Leather: Wears a purple crocodile skin duster at some point in the film.

Jerk with a Heart of Jerk: Despite being a homicidal sociopath, he seems to truly love his girlfriend Harley Quinn. Then in Birds Of Prey, he coldly and violently breaks up with her.

Joker Immunity: He appears to die when his helicopter is shot down about halfway through Suicide Squad. To absolutely no one's surprise, he shows up alive and well in the final scene. It helps that he's the Trope Namer.

Knife Nut: And by God, does he have enough blades.◊

Lean and Mean: This Joker, while muscular, is quite lean, especially compared to the heavily muscled Batman.

Love Epiphany: Well, "love" is pushing it, but Joker realizes his affections for Harley when she dives in the chemical bath that ultimately turned Joker into what he is. Symbolic in the sense she was agreeing to join him in madness. Further adding to the complexity of the scene; Joker was tying up a loose end, having used Harley to escape from Arkham. He lead her to her demise and intended to leave her for death but at the same moment realized she had entered his world and his madness. Joker never anticipated the amount of utter devotion Harley would have for him, something inside him just couldn't walk away from her, so he jumped in to save her.

Manipulative Bastard: He manipulated Harley into helping him escape Arkham because she fell in love with him. When she served her purpose, he would have had her kill herself jumping into a bath of chemicals to prove her feelings. He instead saves her from this demise because he has a Love Epiphany in the moment.

Monster Clown: Like the previous film versions, Joker is an Ax-Crazy criminal with clownish makeup. Green hair notwithsanding, his white makeup, red lipstick and absence of facial scars make him look closer to a mime than his predecessors.

Noble Demon: In Suicide Squad, his whole motivation is to rescue Harley Quinn. His commitment is so strong he doesn't even waste time with pranks or petty acts of cruelty. Everything he does is for someone else.

Only Known By His Nickname: He's only known as The Joker, or "J" / "Mr. J".

Outlaw Couple: He and Harley Quinn are lovers and partners in crime.

Sadist: Even though there was only a few select scenes of him, one of them is him torturing Harley. It's disturbingly obvious that he is positively gleeful over it. And he doesn't seem to have lost any sleep over murdering Robin, either.

Pet the Dog: David Ayer confirms that while he did push Harley out of the falling helicopter, his intent was in fact to save her life.

Satellite Love Interest: To Harley Quinn in Suicide Squad. His characterization revolves entirely around Harley, not even getting involved with the main plot.

Scary Teeth: Several of his teeth are made of metal. According to David Ayer, Batman punched his teeth out after he killed Robin, leading him to replace them with metal teeth.

Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: Although he has a presence at the start of the film, The Joker appears to have left Gotham City to be controlled by Black Mask in Birds of Prey, with Roman saying that Joker has already skipped town.

The Sociopath: He's chaotic and remorseless, much like his previous versions. Special mention goes to his murder of Robin, which he topped off by spray-painting a cruel taunt for Batman onto the boy's costume.

Tattooed Crook: His torso is covered in jester-themed tattoos. He also has a few on his arms and face.

Villain of Another Story: He mainly appeared in Suicide Squad, but his biggest act of villainy to date — killing Robin — happened some years before Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, in which he doesn't appear. The spray-painted message on Robin's empty suit ("Ah ah ah joke's on you Batman!") in the latter film can't be anything else than his doing.

Where Does He Get All Those Wonderful Toys?: Is seen with a rather impressive arsenal of guns and knives. And even says to warden Griggs, at some point, "I can't wait to show you my toys." note Notably, he manages to hijack the gunship which was sent to extract Waller and the squad so he can rescue Harley.

Would Hit a Girl: In the past, the Joker electroshocks and manipulates Dr. Harleen Quinzel into allowing her to fall into a vat of chemicals, in order to become Harley Quinn.

Would Hurt a Child: He killed Batman's sidekick, Robin, while the boy was an underage minor.

You Gotta Have Blue Hair: His hair is bright green.

   "Knightmare" Joker

"You won't kill me. I'm your best friend..." Appearances:

Zack Snyder's Justice League

"You need me. You... need me... to help you undo this world you created, by letting her die."

The Joker meets up once more with Batman in the nightmarish alternate future where Darkseid has conquered the Earth and Superman turned evil. But things aren't the same anymore between the two legendary foes.

See also the Knightmare page for more on that setting's characters.

Break Them by Talking: He deliberately tries to agitate Batman by reminding him of how many people have died on his watch.

Cop Killer: He wears a bulletproof vest with at least two dozens police badges on it. Whether these were good cops killed prior to the apocalypse or servants of the oppressive regime of Superman after the apocalypse is not detailed.

Costume Evolution: He has ditched his garish gangster suits for what looks like either a medical gown or a butcher gown, complete with orange gloves and a bulletproof vest with a dozen police badges pinned on it. He got rid of his "Damaged" forehead tattoo, let his hair grow and put red makeup around his mouth, looking closer to more common depictions of the character.

Enemy Mine: He and Batman had the worst kind of enmity imaginable, but the Earth being conquered by Darkseid is enough of a Conflict Killer for them to call a truce and work together to try undoing this mess.

Evil Has a Bad Sense of Humor: He utters the line "We live in a society" while gazing upon the devastated landscape in the trailer. This is clearly a Meme Acknowledgement, and it's quite awkwardly used given the context (is there really any society left in this post-apocalyptic world?). It doesn't appear in the actual film, however. The line was improvised by Leto.

Evil Laugh: Even with the world being in such a sorry state and him still being sane enough to acknowledge how bad the situation is, he'll still let some laughs out, even though they sound more subdued than ever.

Evil Versus Oblivion: Even he sees the necessity of teaming up with Batman to try undoing what Darkseid did to Earth.

Future Badass: He survived the apocalypse brought upon Earth by Darkseid and looks like he's geared for guerilla actions.

My Card: He gives a Joker card to Batman as a symbol of their truce. Shall the Dark Knight want to break that truce, he'd just have to tear that card up. The card could be seen strapped on Batman's assault rifle in Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice.

Nice Job Breaking It, Hero!: Joker gets a high reminding Batman how costly his mistakes in the past have been.

The Nicknamer: He nicknames Mera "my little fish stick" and Robin "Boy Wonder".

Progressively Prettier: Despite being worse for wear, this Joker is arguably even better looking than his previous appearance, with his over-the-top tattooed gangster image toned down and his androgyny played up. Ironically, this version also more closely resembles the Heath Ledger incarnation.

Thousand-Yard Stare: He has such a stare when looking at the devastated horizon as he starts talking to Batman.

Villain Has a Point: While he’s the one who killed Robin, he gives Batman a minor What the Hell, Hero? for sending “a Boy Wonder to do a man’s job.”

Vocal Evolution: His voice is much softer and higher pitched than it was in Suicide Squad.

[cherry-valentine]

Fall 2020 Anime Season:

Golden Kamuy Season 3 is, so far, just as good as the first two seasons. For anyone unfamiliar with the show, it follows a former soldier called “Immortal Sugimoto” (nicknamed so for his tendency to survive a lot of shit that would kill most people) and a young Ainu (the Japanese equivalent of Native Americans) girl as they search Northern Japan (and even parts of Russia) for hidden Ainu gold. The story is pretty wild, with threats coming from the wildlife and the harsh, snowy conditions as often as from mercenaries, assassins, and various other human dangers. The cast has expanded enough that we have several separate groups of cool, well-written characters roaming about (and they’ve shuffled a bit from season two, making their interactions very interesting). Sugimoto remains one of my favorite anime protagonists. He’s one of the more brutal, violent main characters I’ve seen, but, strangely, also one of the nicest. He’s kind to innocents (both people and animals) but will slaughter his enemies without hesitation. He’s also pretty funny. Then again, almost every character is subject to the show’s weird but endearing humor. It’s very hard to dislike any character, even the ones who are quite cruel. The show is also notable for having a lot of homoerotic subtext. The beefy, handsome men sure do love taking their clothes off and wrestling. Like, taking it ALL off. Multiple times per season. Yeah. Watch this show, everybody.

Ikebukuro West Gate Park is a new show this season that I was initially interested in because it reminded me of Durarara!! in that it’s set in Ikebukuro and features color gangs. That’s where the similarities end, however. Whereas Durarara!! had tons of supernatural elements and just plain craziness, IWGP is more realistic by comparison. The show follows Makoto, a seemingly normal guy who seems to function in a sort of “odd jobs” type of role for a color gang called the G Boys. While they’re a gang, they don’t seem like criminals or thugs, or even delinquents. They really feel more like a club, held together by their respect for the leader referred to as King. So far the series seems to be episodic in nature, with most stand-alone episodes focusing on some sort of social issue, from drug addiction to immigration. It’s interesting to see these issues presented in such a sympathetic light, viewed through the lens of Tokyo’s youth. The art is nice, with varied character designs and animation that’s just good enough that you don’t notice the problems very often. The music is a highlight, with my favorite opening theme of the season and one of the better ending themes.

Magatsu Wahrheit is a show I was very iffy on at first. It has a lot of things working against it. It’s based on a video game I’ve never heard of, the opening theme is one of the cheapest, most unimpressive things I’ve ever seen (note: it does improve a few episodes in!), and the series overall has a low budget feel (though nowhere near as bad as Gibiate from last season). But the story is actually very interesting and very well written. The basic premise is that Young Man A (I’m not remembering these weird names, sorry) works as a delivery truck driver in your usual “modern fantasy” setting (kingdoms and monsters and other medieval fantasy trappings alongside trucks and cars and advanced science laboratories). When he’s loading up his deliveries, Young Man B, a fresh recruit in the kingdom’s military and general goody-two-shoes, randomly offers to help Young Man A load his truck. Young Man B spots some boxes off to the side and, assuming they were part of the load, puts them into the truck while Young Man A is talking to his boss. These boxes turn out to be illegal weapons being smuggled by a group of... freedom fighters? I guess? This, in turn, drags Young Man A into a shit storm of trouble when the illegal weapons are discovered in his truck. It also leads directly to tragedy for Young Man B as well, setting them both on wildly different but similarly dangerous paths. The whole idea that a simple act of kindness for a stranger sets off such a terrible series of events is pretty engaging. As it stands in the show right now, Young Man A is the more compelling character. He’s just a truck driver. He’s a coward who runs from danger and wants no part of any of this. But at the same time, he can be surprisingly brave at times (usually when a child is in danger). In a twist on the usual trope, these spurts of bravery are rarely rewarded. At least twice, his decision to act has led to heartbreaking tragedy. So far Young Man B is your typical “idealistic youth realizing the military isn’t comprised entirely of nice people” type of character. As such, he’s just not as interesting. He hasn’t had as much screen time though, so hopefully he’ll grow as a character. I guess it says a lot that I’ve written so much about the show, and almost all of it is about the plot. But the plot is really the only remarkable thing about it. In this case, that’s enough.

Higurashi no Naku Koro ni is, well, a bit of a trainwreck. And I’m not necessarily talking about the quality of the show. Let me explain: The show was marketed as a remake of the 2006 anime, which was one of my all-time favorite series. I was pretty excited about it. Lots of new fans who had never watched the original started this one. The first episode was okay. I wasn’t crazy about how shiny everything looked (I realize the original’s visuals are a bit dated now but at least they were unique, this new one looks like pretty much every harem anime from the past five years) but the story seemed to be doing good and I looooooved the use of the original opening theme song as the closer. Then episode two dropped, and the fandom basically exploded. The first few minutes of episode two reveal that this is not a remake, but a sequel! Shock! At first, I was impressed by this little bit of manipulation. It felt exciting to realize the truth. But then it dawned on me (and the rest of the fandom) that new viewers who came to watch this were screwed over. Those first few minutes of episode two spoil some very important things from the original series (we’re talking major spoilers here), and it’s going to ruin a lot of plot points for those who never watched the original and now want to go back and watch it first. So here’s a PSA: If you’re new to Higurashi and want to try this new series, DON’T unless you’re okay with watching a sequel that spoils the original.

Okay, so now let’s talk about this new series/sequel. First, the good points: The ending theme is GORGEOUS. Just... go watch it. Soak it up. The opening isn’t bad but I can’t help comparing it to the far superior original opening. Aside from the overly shiny and generic character designs, the rest of the visuals are pretty great. The scenery in particular is very nice. In terms of story, I like the idea of beginning each new “arc” by staying close to the original story, then throwing in some pretty wild deviations that make them end in completely different ways because a character that lived through the original is trying to make subtle changes (that so far have ended up turning out very badly). When it comes to the bad points, one in particular sticks out: It’s not scary! The original had some truly unsettling moments, and so far this one hasn’t even been creepy. It’s had some moments that obviously tried to be scary but have failed miserably. For example, the early scenes with Rena in the original were actually terrifying. But I felt none of the intensity or creepiness in this sequel. Still, it’s nice to see these characters again and to see how this story deviates as someone tries desperately to change the outcomes.

Haikyuu!! has another new season and... I don’t really know what to say about it. I’ve talked about this show several times now. Looks like this season is going to focus primarily on one long match, a concept I’m not crazy about. They also made the baffling decision to cut in with a full episode about a rival team’s match right in the middle of showing the match with the main team. I mean I love seeing more of the rival teams but it felt disjointed to do it this way. Still yet, it’s a fun and energetic show full of great characters and easily understood volley ball matches.

Jujutsu Kaisen is probably the most hyped up new show this season, and I would say it definitely deserves that hype. It’s a pretty familiar shounen fighting anime setup: A teenage boy acquires special powers and joins a school to train so that he can use those powers for good. However, following that formula does little to negate just how fun and well-done this series is. A lot of people have compared it to Naruto (the protagonist is a vessel for a powerful entity, he joins a trio of characters with a more serious and moody black-haired boy and a chick, and they have a badass teacher with silver hair who keeps his face partially covered). So sure, it’s like Naruto... except it’s much better than Naruto in every conceivable way. The animation and fight choreography are consistently fantastic. The main character is not the least bit annoying. The only chick in the group (there are more cool ladies in the story, just not in this group!) is a badass in her own right and her story and motivations have absolutely nothing to do with romantic interest in any of the guys. Even the teacher character is incredibly fun. The music is great, with my favorite ending theme of the season. You know it’s an excellent ending theme when people start making different versions of it using characters from other shows. It’s so, well, fun. A word I keep using here, because that’s the first word that comes to mind when I’m watching this series.

Talentless Nana is one of those shows that’s going to be difficult for me to talk about without spoiling a very cool surprise. This surprise comes at the end of episode one (basically, the show makes you think it’s about something, but turns out it’s about something completely different). So if you want to really enjoy that surprise, stop reading this and go watch episode one before coming back. If you’ve already watched it or don’t mind having the surprise spoiled, here we go: The first episode sets up the series to be a cheap Boku no Hero Academia knock-off. We have a school of “talented” (super powered) kids training to use their powers to save humanity from (so far) unseen monsters referred to as “the enemies of humanity”. We are told one boy has no “talent” or special power and he’s ridiculed for this. There’s a new transfer student named Nana, a super sweet and cheerful girl with pink hair who has the ability to read minds. There’s also another transfer student, a sullen and quiet boy named Kyouya who hasn’t disclosed what his “talent” is. With that setup, I think a lot of people were ready to dismiss it as “BNHA, but not as good”. But then, a few minutes before the first episode ends, we’re hit with the twist that reveals what this show is really about: Nana is the one with no “talent”. She lied about being able to read minds (the boy we thought had no talent did actually have one). She’s a totally normal human being, and she has been sent to infiltrate the school and kill off the students, the true “enemies of humanity” (called so because their powers make them incredibly dangerous). Thus, the show is about a normal human girl using only her wits and skill in manipulation to kill off super-powered individuals. Watching her work is an absolute delight. She is ruthless and incredibly intelligent, but she does have one major problem: the other transfer student Kyouya, who is at least as smart as she is and is suspicious of her right off the bat. But since he’s not sure she’s up to no good, he can’t really act on his suspicions. Nana in turn knows he suspects her, so she has to be careful around him. As a result, the two become “friends”, constantly watching and outmaneuvering each other. In this way, the series reminds me of the early, best parts of Death Note, with the mental sparring between Light and L. But the most fun you’ll have with this show is watching Nana come up with ways to deal with each new “talent” she comes across, from the ability to time travel to necromancy, all while having no special power of her own. The art is nice, a bit generic, nothing too fancy. The music is great, with one of the better opening themes this season.

Moriarty the Patriot focuses on the classic Sherlock antagonist Professor Moriarty. Let me get this out of the way first: I know next to nothing about Sherlock. I haven’t even watched any of the various tv shows about him. What I know of the character basically comes from mentions of him in Detective Conan. So I’m coming into this series with no preconceived notions about these characters and no other versions to compare them to. Anyway, Moriarty as a series is about class warfare. Moriarty as a character pretty much embodies the phrase “eat the rich”. If you’re familiar with the phrase and understand its meaning, you’ll probably like this show. Moriarty works as a professor, but his side job is as a “Crime Consultant”. He helps the poor lower classes get revenge on the cruel nobles and elites who have wronged them. This revenge most often involves murder. There’s something refreshing about how unapologetic it is. In most anime, the hero tries to find other ways to punish evil than by actually killing them, or there’s some lesson involved about how revenge isn’t the answer or how killing someone who wronged you makes you as bad as them. In this series, there’s absolutely none of that. People get their revenge and, so far as I’ve watched, seem to be living much happier lives afterwards. In this way the show totally avoids being preachy. The art is gorgeous, with classy character designs and lovely backgrounds. There’s a certain lushness to it. The music is very nice as well (particularly that poppy ending theme). The only downside is that this has probably ruined me for watching other versions of these characters now. I mean, once you see them as sexy anime pretty boys, it’s hard to see them as anything else.

Carry Over Shows From Previous Seasons:

Black Clover

Best of Season:

Best New Show: Jujutsu Kaisen

Best Opening Theme: Ikebukuro West Gate Park

Best Ending Theme: Jujutsu Kaisen

Best New Male Character: Moriarty (Moriarty the Patriot)

Best New Female Character: Nana (Talentless Nana)

[leapyearkisses]

For the director’s cut: Orbs Are Bad News, please? Part 2 (or both, if you’re willing!) It’s one of my favorites 💗

One of my favorites, too! Thanks for the ask! :D I'll do both parts, with Part 2 to follow this a bit later.

Director's cut comments in bold below the cut! MESS, m/m, holding a handkerchief, etc.

This story came from a prompt on a writing meme about a character losing the use of their hands while having to deal with snz. I can't remember at the moment if the prompt was D&D-flavored or if I just picked that setting myself because I was really into playing the game at the time (still am!). Also I'm incredibly sleep-deprived, so I hope these comments don't ramble overmuch.

"Okay, we don't know what we're dealing with here, so let's be careful." Gerrit pushed open the heavy wooden door and lifted his torch to illuminate the room inside. The firelight played over several tables covered in intriguing objects and glinted teasingly off of more than one hint of gold. Gerrit himself spotted a stolid wooden chest in the corner and his heart rate quickened.

When I was a kid, my mom gave me the Dragonlance books and I fell in love with them, although it was a long time before I was able to play D&D myself. I attribute my love of the very traditional fantasy realm to these books and my enduring love of sickly mages to Raistlin (Soulforge was like an EXPERIENCE for me). Gerrit has his origins in Tanis Half-Elven - he's a good guy, kind of a normal/default fighter build. "Jackpot," breathed Remembrance, the party's resident ne'er-do-well. She rubbed her hands together, sharp nails clicking. Gerrit was sure she was assigning price tags to the lot of it, except for whatever she hid in her bags for herself, of course. "I know a guy in the capitol who'll pay through the nose for that pervy little statue there." "That is a religious object," chastised Cordes with a haughty tsk. "It's used in rituals of worship for the goddess Fortuna." "Oh, I'm sure he'll be worshipping," cackled Remembrance, and she slipped past Gerrit into the vault. "Few hundred gold and he'll be rubbing out a grand ol' prayer." Her pointed tail waved with greedy delight. "Hey! The proper course of action would be to bring it back to a temple!" Cordes went after her, pushing Gerrit aside.

Remembrance and Cordes are here to be the beta couple and provide background color. Their development was based on a few factors: A) a D&D party should have ~4 people with different abilities (fighter, sorcerer, cleric, rogue), B) a priest and a devil is never not a fun/ny dynamic, C) I'm not into F snz but I feel bad that most of my OCs are not women, and D) given that Gerrit is a "default" archetype, there needed to be differing characters to contrast his personality with (or he would seem to have none). Also I like dirty jokes, so Remembrance can be my humorous id for this purpose lol The half-elf grumbled but wasn't surprised. "At least TRY not to touch anything cursed," he called. He'd been the one to organize this little band, but although he was the one who reported to their patron, he had precious little influence over what they did. They were happy to point to him when some upstart had a problem with the party, though. Ingrates. He turned to the last member of the group. "What about you, Llewellyn? I thought I saw some books on the far table." "Lead the way," replied the sorcerer, and his usually mellifluous voice sounded strained. Purple shadowed the hollows under his faintly luminous silver eyes, and he had his nose tucked into his handkerchief again. Gerrit hadn't spent much time around full elves, but he'd always believed they couldn't get sick, at least not like a human or dwarf. Llewellyn had been dragging since Saints' Day, though, and seemed to have come down with a flu. His skin, where visible under his fitted robes, was wan.

Fuck up that slender, haughty elf man is an endlessly running subroutine in my head. "Sure," said Gerrit, and he stepped into the room, holding the door out so that Llewellyn could join him. "You, uh, you don't look like you're feeling any better." "Oh," said the sorcerer, "I'm not. I ran out of tonics." He entered the vault and walked over to one of the tables, investigating a strangely shaped glass bowl. "But as we were already down here, I'm not sure what you want me to say. There's no inn at which I might rest my weary bones." "Cordes could make you an herbal remedy," Gerrit grumped. He went over to the chest he'd seen earlier and smashed the lock off with the pommel of his dagger. He didn't need any fancy lockpicking tools like Remembrance's. And hitting something felt good when his companions were all intent to be annoying, acerbic, or both. "I suppose," Llewellyn replied, sounding uncertain as his voice wavered. Gerrit tried to ignore the way his ears heated at that. That was the tone that overtook the elf when he was preparing to sneeze. It wasn't any of Gerrit's concern. His occasional roll in the hay (literal and figurative) with Llewellyn did not make it easier or more appropriate to acknowledge his odd attractions, especially since they were currently ransacking a dungeon with a priest and a psychopath. He focused his attention on searching the chest, and he was rewarded with a heavy coin purse, a stack of calfskin-bound journals, and a ruby the size of a robin's egg. He whistled.

Gerrit and Llewellyn are the dynamic opposite of Eliseo and Padgett. Gerrit is the less-privileged, more personable, "low class" character and Llewellyn is the high-born, fussier, sarcastic noble; however, in this story Gerrit is the voyeur character with the fetish and the POV window while Llewellyn is tortured for everyone's amusement. Narratively it's more fun and easier for me to describe the non-fetish-having character because I also like the power of the narrator to be that voyeuristic eye. Llewellyn gasped. "Hah- hahttsch-ow!"

I made myself laugh while writing this hahah "'Ow'?" Cordes appeared from behind a bookshelf, one arm wrapped tightly around a thick rug, the other reaching for his pack of salves. "What is it? Cut? Burn?" When Gerrit looked, their sorcerer was rubbing his nose with his left hand. "Bruise," Llewellyn said. He lifted his right hand, in which he held a blue crystal orb that was knotted inside a thin lattice of gold chain. "I got my hand caught." He'd apparently run the thing into his nose when trying to cover his sneeze. Llewellyn's thin face was already dusted pink from the embarrassment. Gerrit couldn't help but laugh. "Very graceful," he chuckled. "I will thank you for keeping it to yourself," Llewellyn replied, and that was elvish dialect for "fuck you." Gerrit laughed again.

Embarrassment is a huge part of my enjoyment of this kink because of the ensuing power dynamics. The victim is thrown into disequilibrium by something (snz) that is inherently seen as socially inappropriate, disgusting, or at least uncomfortable. Almost always their reaction is outsized to what it would probably be outside of a fet context (most people can sneeze in public without feeling shame - which is the typical mode, lol. It's a normal bodily function). However, then the other character, motivated by their BF's anxiety and potential humiliation is prompted to caretake and comfort them, "approve" of the "shameful" act, and deepen the intimacy of the couple. They can also enjoy the embarrassment and the act voyeuristically while feeling their own discomfort about watching, then deal with either having to divulge the kink or be found out by their partner later (because consent is the sexiest thing, really). But I love my characters and I'm not into hardcore stuff so much, so there are almost never any consequences of the "humiliation" - the characters do not get caught out, they do not get shamed by society, they do not actually lose face or have to explain their sexual preferences to anyone who should not know them.

Now you know way too much about my psychology but also the basic formula for any kink story I have written or will write in my entire life. Yay! Cordes had leaned over to see the orb better in the firelight. He was the only one among them whose vision was hindered by the dim light. "What kind of artifact is this?" he asked. "It doesn't resemble anything I've studied."

Lol humans don't have darkvision. "I'm not sure." Llewellyn held it up to the torch. The orb lit up like a lamp, but otherwise nothing happened. "Whatever this chain is, though, it's very prone to tangling." He tried to shake it off his wrist and failed. This was a task for both hands, and he set to freeing himself. And kept trying. And trying. Gerrit frowned. "What are you doing? Cordes, would you get that off of him?" "Sure." The priest reached out to help, but Llewellyn suddenly backed away out of reach. "Uh... I'm not trying to steal it, elf." "Oh, I would let you take it," Llewellyn said, scowling. "But I have a feeling we would be in for some trouble if you touch it now." He held up both hands. His palms were wrapped around the crystal and bound with the ball in that thin gold chain. "I am... I'm stuck."

---

"STUCK," hooted Remembrance again. She was crouched at the entrance to the dungeon - a root-cellar-like set of doors they'd found in a small bandit settlement - and hauling out a heavy pack stuffed with loot. In the daylight, she looked menacing and out of place, her horns, dusky maroon skin tone, and black eyes setting her apart from this land's primarily human residents. "And you even said not to touch any curses!"

Jump cuts are funny! I love this kind of thing, honestly. It's some of my favorite humor - that and dramatic irony, which is also often depicted in visual media with a funny jump cut. "I recall you said so as well," said Cordes, who looked exactly like a run-of-the-mill human resident except for the star-like scar on his left temple. He reached down and grabbed Gerrit's hand, steadying the half-elf as he climbed out of the hole. Llewellyn was hanging uncomfortably on Gerrit's back, arms looped around the other man's neck. They'd tried to find a more dignified way to get him out of the dungeon, but he couldn't manage the ladder well enough without the use of his hands. "The artifact didn't react to my detection spell," sniffed Llewellyn disdainfully, and Gerrit was quick to set him down before that sniffing could become another sneeze. He didn't want to blush in front of the others.

Blushing is very appealing to me, so everyone blushes all of the time. "There must be someone in Veigh who can help you," Gerrit said. "We'll just swing by on our way to the capitol." The city was three days out of their way, but they couldn't have Llewellyn stuck this way for the two week trip back to their patron. With his hands bound, he couldn't cast any spells that required him to gesture, and that was almost all of them. He'd effectively rendered himself completely useless in combat. Veigh had a chapter of the Mages Guild in residence, though, and if no one there could help, they might at least be able to send Llewellyn on ahead via a transportation spell.

Let's go on a short tangent about names. Usually I name my characters using Babynames.com or similar sites and I pick based on the look, sound, and meaning of the names. For this little group, things were slightly more haphazard. Llewellyn is a Welsh name meaning "leader." I just happen to like this name already, but it also has a visual beauty and difficulty to pronounce on sight that lent it well to an elf character without me having to look up specifically elven names. When I make elf characters in D&D, I tend to give them a nickname or alias that is easy to remember and pronounce so that the name isn't a hindrance while playing the game.

Gerrit's name was picked based on sound. It is similar to the Welsh name Gareth ("spear ruler"), which is on purpose, but it was altered to make it a bit more fantastical/removed. It's appropriate for a fighter in meaning but also suits his more familiar/pedestrian half-elven experience vs. that of a noble elf.

Cordes was given a short name because he is a no-nonsense human, but I chose it to resemble that of conquistador Hernan Cortes because of the "holy invasion" and "treasure hunter" associations. Remembrance is named using the PHB's suggestion that tieflings often pick "ideal" names for themselves, and she has a complicated past (like most tieflings). "I will hope there is." Llewellyn looked pale and worn, though his fine features still exuded the otherworldly beauty of the high elves. His hair was a silky black, although mostly covered by his hood, and the contrast made his silver eyes look even more curious. He fumbled for a minute at his waist before scowling heavily. "I can't get into any of my bags, of course..." "What do you need?" asked Gerrit. Remembrance had started off through the trees, humming, her bulging pack swaying with her sinuous movements. Gerrit really didn't want to let her get too far ahead, not least because she was scary good at concealing herself in the foliage and might slip the party completely. However, Cordes was with her, and Llewellyn couldn't exactly fend for himself right now. "My handkerchief..." The elf's voice had gone wavery again, and Gerrit watched as his nostrils flared. Fuck.

Oho! Here is the plot and the kink conceit. Gerrit hurriedly patted his pockets until he produced his own handkerchief, or what he bothered with when necessary. It was a large square of flannel, rough around the edges. It wasn't embroidered or monogrammed like Llewellyn's, but he figured by now the flannel was a hell of a lot cleaner, and it was soft for an irritated nose. "Here, take mine."

Characters' belongings are also a good way to contrast their situations and personalities. I don't consider handkerchiefs particularly vital to my enjoyment of this kink, but they are a useful visual and I like to describe things. Small details like this are how you can worldbuild without having to do too much extra research. Llewellyn held out his hands plus the orb for it, breath hitching, but no matter how Gerrit tried to drape the cloth, it kept slipping off of the artifact. He supposed he could try to tie it around the-

This is just so funny to me XD Llewellyn made a desperate sound and tipped his head back, exposing the long line of his throat. His breath was coming in soft pants now. And he was raising the orb reflexively. Gerrit couldn't let him whack himself in the face again, so he did the only other thing he could think of. With one hand he reached out and took Llewellyn by the shoulder. With the other, he lifted the handkerchief and pressed it over the elf's nose. His fingers settled firmly on either side of Llewellyn's nostrils, and none too soon. After another half-hitch, Llewellyn ducked forward again with a quiet but insistent sneeze. "Happtsch!

One of the most pleasing sneeze sounds, tbh. Gerrit was sure he was beet red. “Bless you,” he mumbled. Through the cloth, Llewelyn’s nose felt hot, and any gentle pressure resulted in a bit of a squish. “Let me just…” "Whh- wait-" Llewellyn leaned into the handkerchief. "I'm nh- I'm not done hhH-" His eyes slipped shut and he gasped again. Gerrit swallowed and tried to ignore the tenting of his breeches. "R-roger that." He could feel Llewellyn's nostrils twitching against his fingers. "Hh...Haah- Hapttschuh! Snrk... Aptschiu!" His body rocked, and he took a half-step forward. Gerrit could hear the thick sound of congestion in the elf's nose as he tried to stave off another sneeze.

The desperation, talking through the sneezing, and congestion are all vital parts of this scenario. Unavoidable embarrassment + disgust factor + need for caretaking/mitigation. "Blow your nose," he said. "It will help." Llewellyn hesitated, but in the end, he had to comply. There was nowhere for the mucus to go except out. He started to blow with a gurgle.

I used to be really against mess, but the taboo/disgust part of the brain turns off psychologically a LOT during arousal and now I really do not find snz interesting without it. Snz without mess isn't embarrassing enough or visually exciting. Gerrit moved the hand from his shoulder to start rubbing Llewellyn's back. The handkerchief and his fingers were rapidly growing damp, but he really didn't mind. "There you go." He held the handkerchief to Llewellyn's nose until the elf moved back on his own. His nose was red and tender looking, and his cheeks were flushed rosy. He didn't seem to want to meet Gerrit's eyes. Gerrit didn't mention it. He didn't really want to look at Llewellyn either right now. It had been a while since the elf had looked so very fuckable.

Potentially due to my propensity to write fanfic about established ships, all of my OCs apparently have a history or mutual attraction out of the gate. On one hand, it's difficult just mechanically to write a scenario about a romantic or sexual encounter without there being chemistry and an excuse for them to already want to rub bits (obviously), especially in short stories, but I also cannot stand the thin veneer of situational causality that underlies porn (to borrow from Cards Against Humanity). If I can't care about my characters' lives outside of the one random fetish scenario, I can't care enough to write about them at all. He put the handkerchief in an easily-accessible outside pocket of his vest. "Ready to go?" Llewellyn coughed lightly. "Yes." "Excellent." Gerrit gestured for Llewellyn to precede him, and the two of them headed out through the trees, following the sounds of Cordes negotiating the underbrush and swearing about it. --- Travel proved easy enough once they made it to the road. They were fortunate not to meet anyone else along the way. The party could handle a group of bandits without their sorcerer, but they had their treasure to worry about, and Remembrance always drew stares, and sometimes aggression, even from normal travelers. Gerrit thought her skills more than made up for the extra negative attention they drew. And anyway, Remembrance was crazy but she wasn't evil. She did better out on the road than in town, but that was probably true of all of them. Llewellyn kept up with her pace, but it was clearly a struggle. He was usually fairly quiet, but he didn't speak at all as they walked, focusing on breathing and not devolving into coughing or more sneezing. There were a few times when Gerrit hastily reached into his pocket, at the ready, but Llewellyn fought back the itch with admirable determination. He kept his nose from running by sniffling heavily, which sounded somewhere between awful and revolting. Cordes commented on it multiple times with disgust, but nothing could be done. Llewellyn held his tongue, and Gerrit was reluctant in this case to offer the handkerchief without being asked.

Cordes is here providing the societal reaction and voice of reason lol, but there still aren't any consequences or shaming from them. I just imagine how fricking uncomfortable it would be if people acknowledged this porn scenario happening in-world and so that is never part of the story development. They found a place to camp about half an hour outside the small village of Tewks. Remembrance cleared out some brush to make a flat area for the bedrolls and then promptly decided she'd rather sleep in a tree with everything she owned. She found a good, solid oak a few yards from the camp and ensconced herself in the crux of its branches. She had a good view of the road in either direction and volunteered to take the second watch in the middle of the night, which was her favorite time. Gerrit agreed to take the first watch as Cordes started to set up his tent. The priest refused to sleep on the ground and always took an extra fifteen minutes to erect a curious one-person canvas canopy. It wasn't even large enough to sit up inside, but whatever. The priest never asked anyone else to haul it along, so Gerrit wouldn't complain.

Remembrance and Cordes are thus handwaved away from the sexual center of the plot and they will neither see nor hear anything they aren't invited to. These arrangements left him and Llewellyn alone together on one side of the fire, and he supposed that was preferable during the orb situation anyway. Llewellyn couldn't handle his own bedroll, help with the fire, or unpack any of their supplies. Gerrit realized he would probably have to help the elf eat, too. And... Well, when he noticed Llewellyn fidgeting uncomfortably, Gerrit took him out into a thicker copse to see to his other needs. They didn't talk about it... Llewellyn could hardly undo his own buttons, though, and it wasn't the first time Gerrit had taken over.

I am very into watersports, so it creeps in, although I don't think there's a friendly community out there for that like there is for snz, so I haven't developed any kind of presence for it. It appeals to me for pretty much all of the same reasons as described above. Maybe someday I will start writing those kinds of stories on this account as well, but I don't know if they would find an audience, so maybe not. By the time the fire was hot enough to cook over, Llewellyn had tucked himself up to sit on a tree stump, exuding an aura of furious self-reproach. Cordes took some jerky into his tiny tent with him - for some reason. Gerrit made up two bowls of pottage and sat himself on the ground at the roots of the stump. He put one bowl on the ground for himself and then held up the other. "Hungry?" "Not particularly," Llewellyn replied, voice blunted with congestion. He coughed. "But you're going to make me eat something, aren't you." "I'd prefer you do it willingly." Gerrit tapped the spoon on the side of the bowl. "Come on. It's hot. You'll feel better." Llewellyn growled in a manner more suited to orcs than elves. "I feel like an invalid." Gerrit sighed. "Well, if it makes you feel better, we can pretend you lost your arms in an owlbear attack very tragically." He could feel Llewellyn's fiery glare on him and smiled a little. "Look, we've all done stupid things while adventuring. I'm sure you remember when I tripped and knocked myself out on that knight's shield during the tournament." "I remember," replied the elf, begrudgingly. "Besides, you're sick on top of the whole orb thing. Maybe your detection spell wasn't sensitive enough. Maybe the thing's not even cursed! Maybe it's supposed to do this, and we just don't know why." "I have a hard time believing that. What possible purpose could this serve?"

Porn! Gerrit shrugged. "Don't ask me. Dad says my mother was a druid, but I haven't got a magical bone in my body." He tilted his head. "We could always try smashing it?" Llewellyn's rejection was forceful. "Do you want to explode?!" Gerrit chuckled. "Not really." Llewellyn sighed. Gerrit held out a spoonful of pottage. Feeding both Llewellyn and himself was a bit difficult, but Gerrit did well enough when he could alternate. It would be better if he could use both hands equally like Cordes, but he couldn't, and so he didn't. He just thought about it wistfully as he worked. Llewellyn ended up eating most of his bowl, then went back to sitting quietly and sniffling. Gerrit finished the rest and put the utensils aside to deal with later. And... Even though Llewellyn hadn't asked, he drew out his handkerchief again.

More caretaking, more intimacy. Gerrit is a kind and loving person even though he's a fighter by trade. "Hey," he began, trying not to sound awkward. "You wanna blow your nose?" No one else was paying attention and Llewellyn didn't need to inhale any more of that crap. The elf gave him a shitty side-eye. "Come on," said Gerrit. "Don't be like this." He patted the ground in front of him encouragingly as if Llewellyn was a recalcitrant cat. "I'm fine," said Llewellyn, and then betrayed himself with a quick breath. "Hah--" "Come on," Gerrit repeated, "before you make a mess."

He is also pretty comfortable talking about a lot of things that people with the fetish have generally admitted difficulty acknowledging. This is because even though he's the one with the fetish in this, he is also the "Padgett" character and practical and not caught up in the anxiety prison. Llewellyn came down off the stump to sit in front of him, legs tucked underneath, and rested the orb on Gerrit's thigh to balance himself. His eyes were pinched with reluctance, but Gerrit could see that the elf's nostrils were already damp. "Hah- hh- hurry," Llewellyn gasped.

People should sit in each other's laps. It's good. Again, Gerrit reached out with the handkerchief, enfolding his companion's nose. He could feel Llewellyn's breath fluttering against his hand through the fabric and hear quite clearly how it kept catching on congestion. "Hah-hngk- Hahgkttscht!" Llewellyn ducked forward with the force of it and Gerrit steadied him with a hand on his hip. "Ngkttsch! Hnggktxch!!"

The sneezes now involve nasal consonants because of congestion. Sometimes people tend to have a certain way their sneezes always sound, and I try to maintain that, but these details are important to show a change in the severity of the cold (and evidence of sniffling for hours). Gerrit bit his lip sharply to keep from saying anything, but his body was singing with arousal. Llewellyn hiccupped a short gasp and Gerrit pulled the handkerchief away to present a clean corner. The current spot had become soaked and silvery. "Bless," he managed after a moment, and he carefully readjusted the cloth. "Are you going to sneeze again?"

Hiccupping is also sexy and cute. Also I spelled that wrong in the original, gdi... Llewellyn nodded, eyes teary with the effort of the first bunch. Gerrit wasn't surprised; the elf had been holding back since they left the dungeon. He couldn't imagine it had been comfortable, but Llewellyn had his pride. He never would let Gerrit give him love bites either. Annnd Gerrit was going to have to stop thinking about that. "Haptsch!" Easier said than done. Really. But Llewellyn's comfort came first.

Voyeur with a heart of gold. "Hahkptsch!" The sorcerer groaned softly. "Hah- hh- Hgnaptscxhx!" Gerrit did his best to assist Llewellyn through the fit. He kept the handkerchief secure, moving it when necessary to keep it dry enough. He steadied the elf when the sneezes bent his body or when he felt faint from lack of breath. He even massaged Llewellyn's nose for him when he was trying to blow it and the congestion was stubbornly refusing to move. By the time he felt finished enough to lean back, Llewellyn was flushed and light-headed, swaying where he sat. Gerrit was sweating and needed a towel. "........Thanks," murmured Llewellyn, eventually.

Sometimes kink authors tend to just write out like twenty sneezes in a row and I hate that, honestly. (No shade - I don't even have an example in mind because I don't read a lot of stories anymore and everyone has their preferences.) I just think that the kink should support the storyline and not the other way around. The story should be enjoyable and sexy but have a narrative structure and coherent rising and falling action. Even if a fit is a sexy scenario (it is), trying to make your eyeballs power through a repetitive series of nonsense syllables is counterproductive and takes the reader out of the story and into the realm of annoyance, which disrupts arousal as well. "Yeah," said Gerrit. "Sure." He swallowed. "Let's wash up." He helped Llewellyn to his feet and they went a little way to a creek (generously; it was little more than a ditch through the woods). Gerrit gently washed Llewellyn's face, careful of his tender eyes and nose, and sent him back to camp to lay down for the night. He lingered at the water's edge to wash the handkerchief and, well, to take other matters in hand.

If ya know what I mean. Llewellyn was completely out when he returned, and Gerrit was grateful. He smoothed the elf's bangs back and then settled beside the fire to take watch. The woods in the dark were full of the sounds of insects and small animals moving in the undergrowth. And Llewellyn snoring and sniffling in his sleep. Safe sounds. Gerrit rested his chin on his hand and looked toward the road. Damn orb. It was going to be a long way to Veigh.

And this was getting long, so this is where I cut it to make part 2, which I will also commentate in a bit (hopefully after a nap =___=). Thanks!

[words-writ-in-starlight]

what's DFZ?

DFZ! DFZ! DFZ!

Okay, so, the DFZ series(es?) is kind of a catchall name for a couple of series by Rachel Aaron that take place in the same urban fantasy universe, the DFZ books and the Heartstriker books.  Urban cyberfantasy?  You could throw a lot of adjectives into that descriptor if you wanted to.

The general premise is that once upon a time Earth had magic.  A lot of magic.  Absolutely god-creating levels of magic.  And then, mysteriously, it all drained away some thousand years ago, leaving humanity to forget all about it while the creatures who needed it to live either withered away completely (spirits, gods, etc) or went into hiding and hibernation (also some spirits, dragons, etc).  And then, like a switch being flipped, it all came back at once in 2035, and suddenly humanity had a lot of magic to throw around and no idea what was going on.  That was a few decades ago at the start of the Heartstriker books, which are a couple decades before the DFZ books.

(Incidentally, I really like that choice.  It would have been very easy to write a novel about humanity getting magic back and running around like chickens with our heads cut off, and don’t get me wrong I would have read and adored that book, but setting things a little later means that magic is just Part Of The Deal and it’s so much goddamn cooler.)

Which brings us to the DFZ proper, also known as the Detroit Free Zone.  When magic came back, a lot of shit woke up really fast, chief among them A, dragons, and, B, Spirits of the Land.  Like the Lady of the Great Lakes, Algonquin, who was really, really not having it with every city in a hundred mile radius dumping pollutants into her water by the metric ton.  So she wiped most of the Great Lakes states off the map, and took over the ruins of Detroit to make the Detroit Free Zone, where the only laws worth mentioning are:

No murder

No dragons

No polluting the water

Anything else is pretty much free game.  So you can imagine that the DFZ gets to be a pretty interesting place pretty goddamn fast--the most magical city in the world, where anyone can do anything without fear of the law coming down on them, under the iron hand of a goddess who doesn’t much care for humans.

Anyway, if that sounds cool and you like any of the following, you should actually just trust me and go read these books without bothering with the rest of this post:

Immaculately well-constructed magical worldbuilding--the entire second book of the DFZ trilogy is basically “how to out-litigate a curse and the consequences of doing just that”

Humans Are Special trope, but in the “if you could all just slow down on the innovation we’d all be a lot safer” kind of way, which is a personal favorite

Dragons!  Lots and lots of dragons from all over the world!  This is an absolutely spectacular series for dragons, despite Algonquin’s best efforts!

Sentient cities!  The DFZ takes a while to get moving (magic takes time and big magic takes big time) but once she does, oh boy do I ever love her so goddamn much, get wrekt Algonquin

Magic Is Normal tropes coming out your goddamn ears, mixed with a healthy dose of Technology Is Magic (AIs can project stuff straight into your brain by hooking into your natural magical field and y’all...I’d kill for it...that’s so cool)

Really genuinely likable characters--Julius, Marci, Opal, and Nik are all completely fantastic and I would get drinks with any of them, and also the main romances actually enjoy each others’ company in non-romantic contexts, which is remarkably refreshing

Seers, and the finicky game of making the future jump the way you want it to jump while someone else who can also see the future is trying to make it jump the other way

Doesn’t that sound rad?  Yes, it does, I’m telling you that these books are amazing, the first DFZ book is called Minimum Wage Magic, and the first Heartstriker is called Nice Dragons Finish Last, go forth and read.  Either series is a great starting point, I actually liked reading the Heartstriker books after the DFZ books because I loved seeing Opal meet Julius, Main Character Boy for the Heartstrikers, as a competent and universally respected adult, and then getting insight into his brain which is just that one gif from Community with the pizza and the fire, all the time.

As per usual, more details under the cut.

So, magic comes back and Algonquin wreaks destruction and the DFZ happens.  Smash cut sixty years into the future for the Heartstriker books, starring Julius Heartstriker, the youngest and most regrettably tenderhearted dragon in the massive Heartstriker clan.  Julius’ primary problem in life is that he does not enjoy lying, scheming, manipulating, threatening, murdering, or power tripping, which means that his entire family pretty much takes carte blanche to kick him around like a soccer ball.  This comes to a head when his mother, Bethesda Heartstriker, puts a curse on him so that he can’t access his draconic form and dumps him unceremoniously into the DFZ, where dragons are executed on sight, with strict orders to find something to impress her, or else die quietly out of the way.

Julius, to his credit, throws himself into trying to become a Real Dragon as best he can, but he’s just so goddamn nice, he goes out and saves lives and makes bargains and enforced democracy instead of unilateral dynastic rule and falls in love with a human (hi Marci) and makes a name for himself as “the dragon you go to when all your other options would kill you or laugh in your face.”  It’s absolutely delightful to watch.  He’s doing such a good job.

Basically, the Heartstriker books go like this: Julius doesn’t like the way his world works!  And fuck you for telling him that he needs to be less kind in order to work in the world!  He’s not changing himself, he’s going to change the world instead, and because he’s very, very nice, he’ll even let you live there once he’s done!

Next up, the DFZ books, twenty years later, star Opal Yong-ae, who moved to the DFZ from Korea for reasons that become apparent later but mostly boil down to “freedom.”  Since Julius’ first arrival in the DFZ, a lot’s changed--Algonquin is gone, the Spirit of the DFZ is a sovereign entity who has her own motives and desires, and what was once a no-dragon zone is now a neutral territory governed by the Peacemaker, who you might remember as a twenty-four-year-old baby desperately out of his depth and is now a straight up force to be reckoned with, feared and respected around the world.  (I’m so proud of my son.)

Opal’s problems are that she’s a mage who hits like a tank when she’s desperate but can’t handle even the most basic tasks, and she’s scrambling to pay off a massive debt to her father in order to prove that she should be allowed to remain in the DFZ.  These are both old news.  The dead body she finds in an abandoned apartment that she’s been hired to clean out and get ready for renting, on the other hand, that’s a new, kicky, fresh kind of problem, especially once someone starts shooting at her about it.  

She joins up with another Cleaner named Nikola Kos, who she mostly knows as “that scary guy in black” and is an absolute tank who is also secretly very soft.  Their dynamic is so much fun, very intensely “Small Chaotic Drags Big Exhausted Into Drama” with the added bonus that Nik is a very cool cyborg fighter type.  Opal is so determined that it verges on being completely unhinged and I would read 15 books about her.  Also, the third book is out, so that brutal cliffhanger at the end of Half Price Gods is a problem for Eight Months Ago Me, rather than Present Day You.

[sarahxalice]

Character Introduction - Meww Hatsune

--Edits/Updates-- --Edited 8/30/21-- Organized body type information into a list rather than a paragraph.

Hello first post here, maybe I’ll try and setup a format or whatever, but I’ll just go with the flow for now. This very first post will be of my Main and very first OC, Meww Hatsune.

--Origin and Inspirations-- Her origins are quite fuzzy a bit as she is by far my oldest character. She originated as either a character concept to either represent myself online and in games, or as a DND character. She was most definitely used as both and for an extremely long time. Of course character development happens over time and isn’t all at once, it’s just a question of when a solid basis was made for her.

Her name is a bit easier to talk about, while my memory is terrible I can at least probably pull a few references I came across that inspired it. One of the main sources of inspiration was Nyu from the anime Elfen Lied. Unfortunately am currently failing to recall other name inspirations, I can recall having around 3 and yet am missing the others. If I can I will edit this post to update this part, if not I will just make a new post later on adding on information.

As far as inspirations for appearance, characters like Lucy and Nyu from Elfen Lied, Zoey from Tokyo Mew Mew and Yuno Gasai from Mirai Nikki. Main inspiration from these characters is her pink hair and eyes. Skin tone and clothing preferences are based on myself and my own preferences.

Inspirations for her personality while partly coming from characters like Yuno Gasai, a majority of it is just something I was taught about when making characters for the first time for a DND campaign. Which was basically to take a personality trait from yourself and just exaggerate it. And essentially it would be close enough to yourself so it would be easy to roleplay while also not being a complete self-insert.

--Appearance-- As for her appearance, she is shown in my tumblr profile image on the left. Going into more detail I will break it up between her physical appearance and her fashion choices.

-Body Type: -Race: Human (Most Commonly), Half-Demon, Demon -Ethnicity: American (Most commonly) -Sex/Gender: Cis Female -Romantic/Sexual Interests: ♥ Girls ♥ Girls ♥ Girls ♥ (Self-claimed “Super Gay”) -Height: ~5ft 2in -Weight: ~100-110lbs -Physique: Lean musculature (Very fit and active) -Skin Tone: Pale White -Hair: Short, soft, messy/wild Pink hair (Varies between pale pink[255,170,255], neon pink[255,0,255], dark reddish pink[120,0,70] and dark pink[180,50,180]). Eyebrows are neat and moderately thin, usually matching the color of her hair. -Eyes: Tend to be sharp and intimidating. Color usually a bright, near glowing, neon pink. -Age: Typically a young teen to adult, roughly in the range of 16 to 21. -Other: Teeth vary between normal human teeth, adding a fang(s), or razor teeth similar to Soul Eater from the anime Soul Eater.

-Clothing Fashion: For fashion, she typically wears a zip up hoodie, cargo pants, combat boots, and a plain black t-shirt. For some extra details she likes chains, belts, buckles and zippers. Most prominently everything she wears is black, if there is any additional color to her outfit it would be pink as a trim highlight or supplementary color (typically a bright or pale pink). Jewelry isn’t very interesting to Meww, however she sometimes has earrings and is more recently depicted with a ring on her left ring finger and will almost always have it from here on.

--Personality-- She is a rash energetic girl. Hyperactive and proactive, likes to do everything herself. Willing to help anyone she gets along with, willing to take on projects or jobs from others as she likes to just do things herself especially when it comes to fighting. Of course things vary based on the kind of world she is in, in a more fantasy setting she’s typically a fighter/adventurer while in a more “realistic” or modern world, she’s really into athletic fields (commonly things like kendo and track), though combat isn’t out of the question, again depending on the world setting. She has the mindset of a rebel and likes to do things her own way rather than taking orders from another person, though not completely disobedient to anyone, and is not entirely against working with others. She just has a tendancy to lead or go alone on things. She is headstrong, confident, positive, a hard worker, supportive, loving, caring, fierce, aggressive and reckless. Of course she is not without her negative qualities too, some of which have been already named such as reckless and her confidence can be overbearing to outright unreasonable and annoying, and at times even worse. While she is a caring and loving person, she can also be really cruel, uncaring, cold and even sometimes sadistic and heinous. Of course interactions depend highly on the person or situation theyre involved with. As for some more negative qualities, she is very apprehensive and more likely to act negatively towards males than she is females. This as such also affects her romantic interest in people as well, making her solidly a lesbian and having no interest in guys in the least. She’s even hesitant to make friends with the opposite gender and acts very standoff-ish with them (this dislike of males can even be seen with other species such as animals as well). As for females she really loves girls, she loves how they’re all so pretty, beautiful, kind and finds them all amazing. Which kind of skews her views on right and wrong with it. She is way more forgiving to a female who does questionable things and is willing to forgive them or make excuses for their actions. Whereas males she almost is ready to condecend them and look down on them as if they are a bad person before even knowing anything of them. As far as children go she is conflicted on them. She tends to dislike children as well, but can also show kindness and caring towards them. As far as the world around her, she absolutely loves nature and flora. She enjoys fauna too, but not nearly as much, and as far as certain types of fauna, she actually dislikes for example, reptiles and insects. For time of day she loves the night and when its darker out, enjoying gloomy weather as well, such as rain and overcast. She has a neutral feeling towards storms, not particularly enjoying lightning or thunder, but is not disturbed by it. She loves nature to the point of even happy to sleep outside, usually in high places such as in a tree or on a roof. She absolutely loves the snow and snowy regions thus making her favorite season by a landslide, winter.

--Other Information-- Here is where I will put other information that I didn’t feel belonging to any of the previous groups of information, and nor do I believe I could write a whole section on it by itself.

-Relatives: Miku Hatsune (Mother; Yes, the Vocaloid), Teto Kasane (Mother; Yes, the Utauloid), Sylvia Hatsune (Wife), Miku Hatsune (Daughter; Named after her grandmother), Chloe Hatsune (Daughter)

-Allies: Sarah Alice (Close Friend; Soul Twin)

-Likes: Girls, Love, Fighting, Adventuring, Witchcraft, Tea, Cats, Sky, Puns, Sarcasm

-Dislikes: Guys, Not doing anything/Waiting

Fighting Style/Powers: She highly enjoyed close-ranged combat, primarily using her bare hands for hand-to-hand combat, a scythe, a spear, or a one-handed sword with an empty off-hand (rapiers are a particular favorite type of swords she prefers). As far as ranged combat goes, she enjoys and prefers bows, pistols and sniper rifles. As far as magic she uses it slightly more often than ranged weaponry. Prefering the elements of Dark and Ice, while next most commonly used would be fire. Other kinds of magic she has been depicted with is the ability to manipulate blood (while not inspired from, but was rienforced with/from Mirai Kuriyama from Beyond the Boundary) and telekinesis. She thrives on and is extremely fast, being usually one of the fastest people in her world. This also gives her a fairly strong reaction time as well.She sometimes is depicted as fairly strong physically as well, though not usually too far off from average in the world she is in. As far as style, she enjoys and tends to go along with more flair and aesthetic choices in her fighting, sometimes at the cost of efficiency. For strategy she tends to forsake it, while she is fairly intelligent and has the capability to be quite strategic, she tends to more commonly rely on raw emotion and instinct instead resulting in a more feral and sometimes beastial fighting style. As she can be reckless, she is highly aggressive and does not tend to protect herself, sometimes even getting hurt unnecissarily. As she really loves the sky she often dreams of flying, so she usually finds some  way to do so.

Possible Quotes: -”I love you.” -”Fight me!” -”Oh no~ how awful.” -“But why?” -”Meow.”

[the-mill-kat]

Unshaken Chapter III

Arthur Morgan x Reader (18+) Slow-Burn

Posted March 16, 2020

A/N: Here it is! I hope you guys like it, even took a special screenshot for this chapter. Please **like and reblog** if you enjoy, and leave a comment! It really means a lot to me and lets me know if you guys are enjoying it and want more.

You save a mysterious man who is dying on a mountain. Finding out he has Tuberculosis, you use your knowledge and skills with herbs and natural remedies to save him from death and help nurse him back to health. As he slowly starts to recover, you can’t help but wonder: Who is this man? Why had you found him the way that you did, beaten and ill? Only time, patience … and perhaps love … will tell.

2 weeks later

It was mid-morning, the day was absolutely beautiful and you decided to take full advantage of it to tend to your herb garden in the small field next to your cabin. You were on your hands and knees pulling weeds and pruning the plants as the sun shined directly onto you.

The plants you grew needed constant care and were a lot of hard work. But they were worth it, you thought, thinking of all the benefits that they brought. Though it was a difficult task to care for so many kinds of plants, you still enjoyed doing it. Especially whenever you got the chance to go out and see if you could discover any new kinds of herbs to bring back and add to your garden. The hobby was time-consuming, but that was a good thing since it could get boring being by yourself when your brother was out.

But you weren’t by yourself, you thought. Arthur was inside the cabin lying on the couch in the sitting room, still recovering from his tuberculosis.

You smiled to yourself as you pulled another weed from the ground. Arthur had been getting progressively better over the last couple of weeks, and you were so grateful that his body seemed to be growing stronger and stronger with each passing day. Why, just a couple days ago he’d managed to sit up on his own and eat some canned pineapples that you’d decided to give to him. It was really good news that he was able to start eating more solid foods again.

His clothes were another matter you’d worried yourself over. You knew you couldn’t leave him in the same attire for so long, so you’d taken the liberty of taking off his old ones so his body could rest more easily. You’d left his undergarments on out of decency, knowing you could wait for Arthur to decide what he wanted to do past that point.

As you’d undressed him you hadn’t been able to help but admire that body of his. His wounds were healing remarkably well and he had no longer needed any bandages at that point, so his skin had been completely bare for your view. All that thick muscle and that weathered, sun-kissed skin …

At that point you’d forced yourself into a strictly professional state, refusing to allow yourself to look over his body in any other way but medical. You’d washed his old clothes, folded them neatly and placed them on the nightstand by his feet so he’d know where they were when he came to.

You straightened up from the ground and wiped some sweat off your brow with the back of your hand. “Dammit,” you cursed under your breath.

You’d been working ever since your brother had gone out early this morning to go hunting, and that had been at last three hours ago now. You weren’t worried, however. Austin usually took a long time on his trips, often wandering around aimlessly until he found an animal to kill. He wasn’t the greatest tracker, but he tried his best.

Several days ago Austin had returned from one of his trips with a mysterious satchel.

“What do you got there?” You’d asked as he’d brought it into the kitchen and placed it on the wooden table in the middle of the room. You’d went over to close the door to the sitting room so as not to wake Arthur.

“I ain’t too sure,” Austin had answered, taking a seat at the table as you sat down across from him. “I found it by O’Creagh’s Run near where we found that man at.” He scratched his neck. “Haven’t bothered lookin’ in it, figured it might be his.”

You’d looked at your brother skeptically, surprised at that last statement. Due to his strong animosity towards Arthur why on Earth would he not be suspicious of what was in the satchel?

Austin had confessed then, having felt pressured by your peeling gaze. “Alright, alright, I looked. But it didn’t look like nothin’ special. Just an old journal of some kind.”

Your curiosity had peaked at those words and you’d reached into the satchel to pull out the journal. It was definitely worn, but from the edges you could tell that most of the pages had been filled in.

Then you’d lifted the front cover and saw the name in beautiful handwriting.

Arthur

You had immediately closed the journal and placed it back in the satchel, your heart beating rapidly, and Austin had looked over at you questioningly. “Well?” He’d prompted.

“It has his name on the first page,” you’d answered with a shaky voice. You wanted so terribly to see the rest of what was in that journal, but your better conscience won the battle in the end and you’d closed the satchel and locked it in the bottom drawer of your desk, figuring you’d give it to Arthur once he got back on his feet.

You came back to the present at that last thought. Arthur was the first human you had ever treated … and his body was actually responding surprisingly well to everything you had given him.

You reached over to crush some dead leaves off of one of the flower bushes.

You’d been monitoring Arthur’s heart and lungs every day and you could tell the huge difference. The heart was beating regularly and powerfully now, and his lungs were taking in much more air than they had been before. His breaths were getting slightly longer every day, letting you know that they were slowly regenerating the lost tissue that the tuberculosis bacteria had eaten away at. There would be scarring left behind that would stay there for the rest of his life, but you hoped his body would still fully recover enough for him to be able to lead a normal life again.

Only time would tell, though.

He’d been in and out of consciousness for the past two weeks from all the treatments, but that was no doubt a side effect from the medicine and herbs he’d been ingesting. He was also getting better at talking whenever he was conscious, no longer having to take a breath between every few words.

Whenever he woke, you’d taken the opportunity to make sure he ate. Just a few days ago Arthur was able to sit up and start feeding himself. After he would finish his small meals, you made sure he consumed several more spoonfuls of honey each time. It was so important that he take the honey so that it would assist in killing the bacteria in his lungs and the rest of his body.

Honey was the main fighter, the main substance more important than any other in getting Arthur to heal, right next to all the other medicine.

You pondered then, thinking back two weeks ago.

He’d called you honey. At least, you thought he had? Maybe his mind had drifted at that moment, and he’d just been thinking of the sweet substance and happened to say it out loud? You couldn’t be sure … it wouldn’t make sense for him to actually call you that endearment since he hardly knew you past your own name.

But you still wondered.

There was a noise behind you, and you jerked your head around in that direction, expecting to see Austin coming back from his hunting trip.

But it wasn’t your brother.

It was Arthur.

He was fully dressed in his old attire … the same clothes you had found him in that night. A blue long-sleeved shirt with dark brown pants, faded black boots and a large black neckerchief. His chestnut-brown hair was tangled, and his beard had grown out quite a bit from the past two weeks.

He was limping out of the cabin and onto the front porch, an arm clutching his chest as if he were trying to keep himself from falling over.

“Arthur!” You got up from the ground and rushed over to him, forgetting all about your garden. Placing yourself in front of him you stopped him in his tracks, reaching out to try to steady him. “You shouldn’t be out here, you shouldn’t even be standing! Much less walking around.”

Arthur’s blue eyes looked down at you, and for the first time you noticed how truly tall he was. You realized then and there that you’d never seen him at his full height before. The man was practically a giant, standing a full head above you, your own head barely reaching above his wide shoulders.

“I’m fine, Y/N,” that deep southern voice drawled. Arthur closed his eyes in a grimace, letting out a slow breath. “Don’t you worry, now. I just need to take a walk.”

He tried to walk around you but you stepped into his path. “No way, mister, I ain’t letting you take another step away from that couch. Now you turn yourself around and go lie down.”

He smiled at you, but there was no humor in it. “Get outta my way, darlin’,” he said with a bit of venom in his voice, not too harsh but enough to have you back up a little. “I know you mean well, but I ain’t stayin’ on that damn couch any longer.”

Your face grew worried, concerned for his well-being. “You can’t possibly leave now,” you said firmly, “you still need more treatment, or you’re going to get sick again!”

He scoffed, a forceful breath shooting out of his mouth in a huff. “It’s alright, girl,” he said gruffly, “I ain’t got nowhere to go from here, so don’t you fret none.” He lifted his other arm slowly as if it weighed a ton, pointing towards the wide stream. “I’m just gonna head on down to that water over there.”

You realized at that moment that there was going to be no persuading him. Once he had his mind set on something, there was no way he was going to be shaken from it.

With great reluctance you stepped to the side, grabbing the tall walking stick that was propped on the wall, the one you used all the time when you went hiking up into the mountains to search for herbs. “At least take this. I don’t want you falling on your face, you hear?”

Arthur stared at it for a long while then nodded, taking the walking stick with his spare hand, leaning onto it as he started making his way off the porch and towards the large stream that was about sixty feet away.

“Would you like me to come with you?” You asked after him.

He just shook his head and kept going.

You watched him, feeling completely helpless as he continued to grunt in pain with each step he took, slowly getting closer to the water’s edge. He still held his chest with his other arm, his body hunching forward slightly but not stopping.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Arthur felt as though his lungs were going to fall out of his chest, but he couldn’t stay inside that cabin anymore. He needed to get out.

He remembered Y/N telling him that they were above Cerberus Falls, where the hell was that? Y/N had told him it was right before Brandywine Drop.

Finally he reached the side of the wide stream. Looking down, he took in his reflection on the water’s surface. He could see his disheveled hair, his beard had grown out quite a bit, and he looked like a complete mess, but he seemed to be in one piece.

Funny, he thought, he didn’t feel like he was in one piece. He felt as though he was going to fall apart at any moment.

Arthur brought a hand up to his forehead and grunted as a sharp pain went through his head. After several seconds, it finally passed.

He looked down the stream, hearing the roaring sound of waterfalls in the distance. He turned and started heading further down the stream, following the sound.

As he made his way over, he began to lose himself in thought.

He was still here.

Was this real?

Arthur couldn’t begin to fathom the fact that he was still alive, the mere thought of it was overwhelming to him. He tried to remember back to that night again. Damn, why was it so hard?

He almost missed his footing but caught himself on the walking stick Y/N had given him. He was grateful she had offered it to him, it definitely helped keep his ass from falling on the ground. Catching his breath, he started walking again.

Eventually he reached the top of the falls and looked out over the landscape below.

The waterfall was loud as it fell over the edge and landed onto the surface several feet below. Cerberus Falls, Y/N had called it. He almost laughed to himself, was the waterfall named that for the three separate falls it split into? He supposed it made sense, but he’d never heard of the name before.

Arthur looked out further, and noticed the familiar sight. Brandywine Drop. Further still he could see Roanoke Valley after that.

So he was truly in Roanoke Ridge, or just outside of it.

After a moment of taking everything in, he sat down right at the edge of the rocks, letting out a long exhale as he relaxed his entire body and just looked out at the land below.

Maybe this was Heaven?

He almost laughed to himself. No way, he wasn’t a good enough man to make it up there, and even if he was he shouldn’t be feeling any pain, right?

Arthur reached up and rubbed at his chest, trying to ease the aching soreness he felt there.

The air felt cool as it rushed up from below to meet him, the wind blowing his hair back slightly. He took a long, deep breath, then exhaled it out slowly.

He hadn’t been able to do that in so long. It felt so damn good. He took in the sun’s rays, feeling the warmth on his skin. The sound of the rushing water flooded his ears, and he closed his eyes, losing himself in his thoughts.

He thought of the deer again. It had been appearing in his dreams every night since Y/N had saved him. But he couldn’t fathom why, having no idea what it meant.

A haze slowly began to form in his mind, and a dark figure materialized in front of him, taking the solid form of a man. Black hair, a scarred face … Arthur saw his own hands reaching out to the figure in an embrace, placing something on the figure’s head —

John.

Arthur’s eyes shot open, his whole body lurching. He steadied himself on the walking stick as he panted, his entire body hunching forward, suddenly feeling heavy with some kind of invisible weight bearing down on him.

What the hell? Had he been holding his breath? He swallowed hard, closing his eyes as he tried to recall the image again.

The figure reappeared.

John … John Marston.

His brother …

Arthur lifted his head, looking over the vast land into the distance beyond, narrowing his eyes as if he was trying to see where John was. John … his family … where were they? Were they safe? The questions began racing in circles around his mind … then he remembered.

He’d sent John away … right before —

Another sharp pain shot through his head, and Arthur grimaced, bringing his hand up to rub at his temple. He flinched, feeling one of the healing cuts on his face with the tips of his fingers.

Letting out a groan he dropped his hand and gripped the walking stick with both hands, feeling completely lost … in a world that thought he was dead …

A tear rolled down his cheek.

••••••••••••••••••••••••

You’d watched Arthur walk down towards the stream, wanting to make sure that he didn’t get hurt in any way. As soon as he’d reached it, you’d watched as he just seemed to stare down at the water.

Was he looking at his reflection? He lifted his head and looked in the direction of the waterfall.

What was he thinking about?

He started walking down the stream.

Wait, what was he thinking? He couldn’t possibly try to make it any further with the state he was in. You almost felt the need to stop him, but … you were afraid that if you tried he would only fight back, no doubt placing more stress on his body than it was already going through.

You decided to follow him, if only to make sure he was safe.

You were careful to stay in the shadows of the trees as you both gradually made your way over to the waterfall.

Finally, Arthur stopped right at the edge, leaning on the tall walking stick and looking out at the land below. Oh, God, was he going to —

Arthur just sat down slowly, his legs hanging over the edge of the cliff. He kept a grip on the walking stick as he continued to keep his other arm wrapped around his chest.

You approached closer and hid behind another tree, telling yourself you were just keeping an eye on him. Truthfully, though, you were worried for him.

Arthur seemed lost, deep in his own thoughts. He looked as if he were in a great deal of mental pain, and you almost felt the urge to give in and go over to try and comfort him. But you decided it was best to just stay back and give him some space.

After some time passed, Arthur’s upper body suddenly lurched over, nearly falling off the cliff. You lunged forward but stopped yourself as he caught his balance using the walking stick. You squinted to get a closer look … was he crying?

He looked over his shoulder, “What’re you doin’ over there, Y/N?” You were shocked to hear Arthur ask as he looked in your direction, right where you were hiding.

How on Earth did he know you were there? How could he have possibly heard you over the waterfall?

Taking a deep breath, knowing there was no getting out of this, you stepped out from behind the tree and approached him. “I was worried about you, Arthur,” you confessed as you sat down beside him, letting your legs hang off the edge of the cliff as well. “When you started walking toward the falls I wasn’t sure what you were going to do.”

You felt embarrassed, and he let out a rough chuckle. “Did you think I was gonna jump off the cliff, darlin’?”

You felt your cheeks flush, afraid to admit the truth. “Well, I didn’t want anything bad to happen to you. I’m sorry I followed you out here.”

He stared at you then smiled. “You’re alright,” He said, his voice deep. “I don’t blame you.”

You looked over at him. He looked straight ahead, but you noticed the wet trail that ran from his eye and over his cheek. You were almost tempted to reach out and wipe it away, but why?

He let out another grunt of pain, flinching and rubbing his forehead with the tips of his fingers. “What is wrong with me, Y/N?” He asked hoarsely, “Why can I barely remember anythin’?”

You worked up the courage to reach out and rub his back in an effort to try and comfort him. Oh, Lord, you thought. His back was extremely broad and the skin under his blue shirt felt warm, the muscles underneath your hand tensing up.

You shook yourself mentally. This was no time to be thinking that way.

“The medicine and herbs I’ve been treating you with have properties that may cause some side effects to certain parts of the body. They can numb the brain a little bit, effecting your memory. I’ve seen animals act a bit funny on the doses. But don’t worry,” you gave him a smile, “Your memory will start to clear up once we start spacing out your treatments. For now your body needs as much help as it can get so it can fight off the bacteria that’s left.”

“How long will that take?” Arthur asked, but he didn’t look at you. He just kept staring out at the landscape.

“A couple of months is usually the time it’s taken for an animal I’ve treated, but I’m not sure how long it would be for a human. I’m hoping for your sake that it won’t take any longer than it needs to. I’m sure you have family or friends to go back to?”

His body froze under your touch. Had you said something wrong?

“I ain’t sure of that anymore,” he said softly, his voice sounding pained.

Immediately you regretted bringing it up as you noticed another tear roll down his cheek. “Arthur?” You stared at him worriedly.

He just kept looking ahead, a small stiff smile on his face even though his eyes showed immense grief. But of what, you wondered. You turned your head in the direction he was looking, taking in the sights as well.

It felt as if hours had gone by before he spoke to you again. “I was supposed to die … wasn’t I?”

His sudden words had you looking back at him. He was staring at you again, those blue eyes of his red around the corners, as if he was trying to hold his emotions in.

“What you did, what you’re doin’,” Arthur grunted and laid a hand on his chest, “it shouldn’t be possible, should it?”

You didn’t know how to respond as those eyes seemed to stare a hole right through you.

He continued on, “The doctor I saw. He told me it couldn’t be cured.” He rubbed his chest, “I feel like I’ve cheated death … because of you.”

You looked down at your lap, unable to look at him because you weren’t sure of what to say. “I … well … there’s still a lot of work to be done, but — ”

“Why’d you save me?”

His sudden question surprised you, and you looked back up at him. “What?”

His blue eyes narrowed at you. “Why did you save me, Y/N?”

You opened your mouth to respond, but then you realized you had no idea how to reply, not sure if you knew the answer yourself. You thought about it for a moment, trying to form the words in your head. All the while you felt his piercing blue gaze, which wasn’t helping at all.

“I …” you swallowed hard, “You were dying. I couldn’t just leave you there.” There, that should be enough, right? After all, it was the truth, wasn’t it? Maybe?

Arthur was quiet for a moment, then asked under his breath, “Why do you hide it?”

You gave him a confused look, “What do you mean?”

He narrowed his eyes at you intently. “Why do you hide your skills? All this knowledge you have on plants and such.”

You smiled, letting out a small laugh at his wording. “I wouldn’t necessarily call them skills,” you said modestly. “More like a hobby. I’ve never went as far as to treat a human, like I said before. I’ve only ever treated forest or farm animals in my entire life. I haven’t really done anything else.” You looked down at your hands as you fiddled with your fingers nervously. “Honestly I’m surprised that your body has responded so well. And I’m grateful.” You blushed, surprised at those last words that had just slipped out of your mouth.

Arthur chuckled softly. “You’re grateful, huh? “ he asked with humor laced in his voice. A long pause, then he said, “Any other stranger would’ve left me up there, you know.”

You almost gasped at that. “Why on Earth would you think that?”

He just gave a small smile, looking back over the valley. “I ain’t a good man, honey. If you knew who I really was, you’d have never tried to save me.”

You tensed, hearing that word come off his lips again. Honey … You couldn’t say anything in response as you took in his expression, his stiff shoulders, the way he just looked out at the land, almost as if he were staring off into nothingness.

“Arthur … ?”

He didn’t reply.

You reached out again and tapped his shoulder. “Arthur, are you alright?”

His body jerked at your touch as if you’d electrocuted him, and you almost jumped at his unexpected reaction. He turned his gaze toward you and he relaxed, seeming to recognize you. Had he forgotten where he was for a brief moment? Maybe it was the medicine.

“C’mon, Arthur, I need you to come back to the cabin,” you stood and held out your hand in an offering to help him up to his feet, “Your body needs to lie down and rest.”

He looked up at you with disgust at the thought of going back to that couch. But finally he seemed to listen, probably realizing it was for the best. “I guess you’re right.” He grunted in a low voice as he grasped your hand in his big one.

It turned out you needed both your hands and all of your weight to pull him up, but you managed with his help. You offered to let him lean on you but he just shook his head, gesturing at the walking stick. “I’m fine, honey. You got me this, remember?”

He didn’t want to burden you with his weight, you noticed. Smiling, you nodded and turned toward the cabin, walking back slowly by Arthur’s side.

As you made your way over, you couldn’t help but finally ask it.

“Arthur?”

“Yeah?” Oh, God, that heavy southern voice of his sent shivers down your spine.

You took a deep breath, bracing yourself. “Why do you keep calling me ‘honey?’”

— To Be Continued

[nona-gay-simus-main]

Top 10 Worst LGBTQ+ Tropes

It’s pride month so I’m talking about my least favorite LGBTQ+ tropes in media.

Disclaimer 1: Once again: my post my opinion. If you feel differently, do you. But I will assume you’re probably an asshole.

Disclaimer 2: In this post, I use the word Queer Interchangeably with LGBTQ+. If you’re uncomfortable with that, feel free to move along. If you tag my post with ‘q slur’, I will block you.

1. Bi/ Pan Character That ‘Doesn’t Use Labels.’

Why is it that gay/lesbian/straight people often just get to say what they are, but when it comes to bi/pan characters it becomes some type of extreme wordplay. “Ex lesbian”, “lower on the Kinsey scale”, “oh, I just like people, not gender.” (Yes, those are all real examples.)

Of course, there are people who don’t use specific labels, and of course, you can include that in your writing, but there seems to be a big disparity between multi-gender attracted characters who don’t use labels and everyone else, who weirdly enough, usually gets a specific label. 

Just... say the word, pal. Bisexual. Pansexual. It’s not that hard. It’s not offensive. And I’ve never met any bi/pan person who thought that erasure was all the jazz.

2. Coming Out Stories

I’m not saying that’s there’s no value in coming stories, especially ones that are in tune with the changing times, and especially coming out stories of anyone who isn’t a cis WASPy gay man (or occasionally a cis WASPy lesbian), but also, can we please get... something else. 

Like, literally anything else. Queer romcoms, lesbian mafia, bisexual vampires, gay pirates, asexual/aromantic monster-fighters, trans superheroes, nonbinary thrillers. Anything where we are allowed to just exist past our coming out and the focus isn’t how hard it is to be LGBTQ+.

It just seems like for the longest time Coming Out stories (about cis white gay people) were pretty much the only media we can exist in, and while that’s slowly starting to change in recent years, we are nowhere close to where we could be.

3. Bury Your Gays

If you have twenty characters and ten of them are queer; and if straight characters also die, then sure. I’ll let you kill a couple gays. 

But if you only have one or two queers (that also happen to be a couple) and you kill them (or you kill one half of the couple), we’re gonna have a problem.

Especially if the queer character ends up sacrificing their life to save the Straights. Just represent us in media, where we don’t die or suffer, how hard is that?

4. “Blink and You’ll Miss it” Representation

Oh, so you’re a major franchise, or maybe you’re writing a popular long-running book series and you have FINALLY added a queer character to your gigantic cast?

That’s cool. I mean it sucks it took you this long, but we all have to make progress eventually. So are they a main character? How much does their sexual orientation or gender identity affect their experiences? Who’s their love interest?

Or did you just mean they only show up for one scene and have a single line that confirms their identity, and then they disappear into the nether? 

Yeah, fuck you. That’s not representation. That’s you jerking yourself off for brownie points. Well, I’m not giving them to you.

5. Lesbians With Men

Sure, outlier cases exist, but... why do we gotta keep making stories about them?

If this is your lived experience and you want to explore it in a fictional medium, absolutely, by all means. But most of the time this story is made not by queer women, but... pretty much anyone else and it’s just. Exhausting. 

There’s a reason it’s called a “lesbian.” And if she falls in love with a man, at the very least have the decency to make it clear that she’s exploring her sexuality, and it’s cut and dry case of “turning a lesbian.” Or better yet, don’t write it at all.

6. The Trans “Twist”

Can we stop fetishizing and discriminating against (binary) trans people in this way? Trans people are just people. There’s nothing scandalous about someone being trans, and nobody is trying to trick anyone into anything. 

Stop treating being trans as this huge, insurmountable thing. Especially if your story is set in the last ten years or in an SFF context, and just portray trans folks like normal people. Please.

7. The Token Queer

There’s this group of cis allo straight friends and the one gay guy, who is also usually white, cis, middle class, etc. You know - for diversity. 

Sure, maybe if they were childhood friends, or a superhero team or something (although there’s literally nothing stopping you from making at least one more person in the group queer), but I have never in my life wanted to do anything less than constantly hang out with a group of straight people. 

The vast majority of straight people don’t make me feel safe, and I rarely have more in common with them than I do with other queer people. Also, if one person in a friend group comes out, at least two more will - this has happened to pretty much all my queer friends.

It’s far more likely to see a group of queer friends with one adopted Straight, who is a good ally, then the other way around.

8. The Awkward AroAce

There’s nothing wrong with being aromantic asexual. There’s also nothing wrong with being autistic and struggling in social situations. There’s even nothing wrong with being both of those things at the same time. And some people are indeed like that.

But why does this seem to be the only way to write aroace characters? It’s such a stereotype. 

Being aroace just don’t experience romantic and sexual attraction, it doesn’t mean you can’t make friends, or that you don’t know how to behave socially. Aside from their (lack of) sexual and romantic attractions, aroace people are just people and they come in a variety of personalities.

9. Queer Villains

I actually love queer villains. 

In a lot of stories the villain is the most fun and interesting character them being queer is a way of reclaiming things that have been used to hurt us in the past (and still are, in some cases).

But it’s still pretty problematic when this is the only queer character in the work - whether explicitly or just in coding. 

You can have a queer villain, but make at least one of your heroes queer too.

10. The Non-Human Non-Binary

I think it makes sense that some aliens, robots and otherwise non-human entities are nonbinary. Why would a robot have a human gender? Why would an alien race have the same exact gender and sex divisions as humans do?

But can we also get nonbinary representation in humans? Please? Because I don’t think that an alien is doing much to help us be more accepted, and might, in fact, be even more alienating. (ha-ha, alienating. Get it?)

To end this, because of the time we live in:

A list of organizations dedicated to helping Black people you can support.