#I love hearing about stuff and only rarely care about spoilers

[thedemonsurfer]

8D

nothing can break the bond between a friend who loves spoilers and a friend who just watched an amazing show and needs to tell someone the entire plot from start to finish

[damn-stark]

Chapter 16 And wisdom choke you

Chapter 16 of Moonlight

A/N- Aegon: “Maester the psychos are loose. Help me.”

Warning- Swearing, talks of pregnancy, ANGST!!, fluff!!, Aegon, SPOILERS, LONG CHAPTER.

Pairing- Aemond Targaryen x Velaryon!fem-reader, Cregan Stark x Velaryon!fem-reader

Episode- 2x06-2x07

(If you want to be tagged let me know)

————

Of course, you knew Aemond was going to kick his mother out of the Small Council. He said he didn't think she was really needed there anymore.

You also saw his unwillingness as he told you.

Is that why she’s here interrupting your peace?

“You look very lovely today, Your Grace,” Alicent offers you sweet words as if working up to her bribe. Or not?

Then again it’s not like you seek each other's company, so she most likely wants to talk about Aemond with you, and you have some idea what she might say. She was basically yelling it at you for help during the Small Council meeting.

Still, you pretend you don't have a clue and spare a glance at the pretty teal dress decorated with embroidered stars on the long capes that cascade down your shoulders, and then look over at her and notice her studying the pearl headpiece that you wear, the golden arm sleeves that hang from your armbands and weigh down your arms before she meets your gaze and gives you a smile.

“I have to say I always like how you dress, and I don’t know how you do it with your morning sickness.” She says and takes a step closer while you offer her a genuine smile.

“I will admit I don’t know how I do it either, I’d rather be abed, but,” you sigh and take a glance around. “There’s stuff to be done and I really hate being bored and so plain dressed. I blame my father for that.” You laugh softly. “There was never a day I did not see him dressed so extravagantly…except for when it came to training of course.”

She offers you a faint smile and adds nothing since there’s really nothing she wanted to say about your father to avoid upsetting you, and well, she really didn’t care at the moment.

“After the small council meeting, I could not help but hear that you are having trouble keeping food down,” Alicent brings up to not drift away too far.

You nod. “Yes, I,” you pause and drop your gaze as you find that your next words come easy to you. Is it because the way she framed her question is how your mother would have asked you? Or because you really are seeking some help on the matter?

“…I have been finding it hard between not being hungry and not keeping the food down, or my head and stomach aching,�� you spill out your troubles out of desperation. “I never had that while I was expecting Aerion. It was rather easy then.”

Alicent finishes closing the distance between you to be able to grab your arm as she looks at you softly, making her brown eyes almost inviting to get lost in.

“It’s all normal, not every experience will be the same, especially with twins,” she tries to offer you what you seek. “Morning sickness goes away, I found that ginger tea with drops of lemon juice helped me when I was feeling under the weather with Daeron.”

You take in her suggestion with a gentle nod and soon thereafter see her hand gently slide off your arm.

“It will go away. Just like one of the twins will grow like their sibling, don’t worry,” she adds, making you swallow back nervously and nod in comprehension.

“Aemond,” you share in a soft voice that you rarely use when you’re talking with her. “Has tried to read into it. I caught him this morning since it’s the only time he can dive back into his own pleasures before Regent duties steal his attention.”

Alicent blinks and her eyes lose that sweet attempt at being comforting, instead, something else flickers within that makes her eyes dull and her lips droop to a long forming frown.

“He has really jumped into his role as Regent hasn’t he?” She mutters and takes a step back. “He would be so quiet at meetings with Aegon, now…” she trails off and pauses whilst her eyes search the white tree behind you. “He's…different. Colder.”

You take in her words to try and find the fault she clearly sees, but you find nothing. “Well…we are in a time of war. He needs to be hard so people listen, a gentle voice makes them too lenient and carefree like Lord Jason Lannister.”

Alicents eyes snap to you and the corner of her lips twitch with discontent, yet she doesn’t give up.

“Does that mean having to kick his own mother out of the Small Council?” She now blurts, making you stiffen only because it’s awkward and something she should talk about with anyone else but you.

“If it’s any consolation, the decision wasn’t easy to make,” you reveal, causing her eyebrows to briefly meet in the middle as she’s slightly surprised by the words you admit. But then her expression changes as she’s proven right.

“I see,” she mumbles and drifts her eyes away for a moment before she lifts her head up high to slowly look at you with this desperation that makes her eyes wide and glisten as if she wants to lure you in.

“You and Aemond are close, I see that. I have always seen it since you were children, but now that you’re married, now that you have a family of your own it seems that connection has only grown,” she rolls out of her tongue. “I’m glad that he has someone he loves, a best friend with a key to his heart. He needs that now more than ever.”

You blink and slowly figure her out. Those sweet words, and that thing she’s doing with her eyes.

“He needs someone to keep him calm, someone to make him see reason,” she continues to ramble. “And I’m glad that it’s you. You’re gentle just like your mother. You have reason. And you’re smart.”

And once again she’s proving that she does not know you. The way you are is a reason why your mother was also hesitant to let you fight, like Jacaerys you’re quick to upset, so you suppose you get that from her.

“You have to be his reason, you have to be like a voice in his head, and I know it’s not always easy but you are the only one with access to his heart—��

“And I have no means of changing it,” you cut off her rambling while looking at her with discontent and disapproval. “He can’t be on his ass, or be some lenient Regent who lets people walk over him. He has to put his foot down; he has to get his hands dirty. We’re at war. You see that, you have lost a soul because of this war, do you want to lose more?” You snap at her in defense of Aemond.

“I will interfere when I can,” you admit but that doesn’t offer her peace of mind, instead she grows more upset. “But I won't bend him at the will of anyone just so he can what? Give you your seat back on the Small Council?”

Alicent swallows back nervously and drags in a deep breath that makes her chest rise high. When she lets the breath go it comes out shaky and her eyes now glisten because she’s being attacked.

Yet she doesn’t let herself be defeated just yet; she holds your gaze and tries to jab back. “I wonder if you will say the same thing in regards to him hurting more of your family? Or do you say this now because it benefits you?”

Your jaw clenches and your anger is quickly summoned, but you’re also quick to reel it back to respond with an icy demeanor that works to intimidate her more than your anger would.

“Have you ever been in love?” You catch her off guard with your question, and as you see that you give her a moment to collect herself and gather her thoughts.

Albeit her lips part and she doesn’t answer, her eyebrows knit together and she looks at you troubled, as if the question itself is physically tolling.

You see that so answer for her. “I will take that as a no, so I will explain it to you,” you continue with a hint of cockiness behind every word. “I tried hating Aemond, I did. I told him that, but…no matter what he did, I can’t muster myself to. I can’t even muster a smidge of hate. Even when I’m mad at him he’s such a relief to see, does that make me foolish? Maybe. Maybe I am foolish for loving someone who killed my brother, but…” you trail off and swallow back thickly.

“My heart sings for him, for every part of him. The bad parts, and especially the good ones. That’s what love is. It’s loving every part of them. It’s not about changing them to your will, you can guide them, and help them, but why would you want to change who they are? If you’re going to be with someone, it's because you love who they are. Why would you be with someone that you want to change?”

Alicent blinks repeatedly and tries hard to fight the tears brought by defeat and guilt.

“I see who Aemond is turning out to be,” you try to be understanding. “I see his anger, but don’t you see that he’s always been like that? Deep inside it’s who he is, who was made to be. And he’s not all bad, he just can’t express his desperation to keep his family safe, don’t you see that? He’s not only working for my son and me but for you and Helaena. So no…I won’t change him. I love him. I love who he is. I love all of him,” you say those last words tenderly and it almost works to convince her that it will all be fine, but you see it, she’s still scared of him, of who’s coming out of the shadows.

And maybe soon you will change your mind, he will do things that will make you change your mind, but right now you believe every word that comes out of your mouth. You love him with all of yourself. You love all of him.

“We’re at war, Alicent, we have to be ruthless. Us, more than anyone because we’re women. Learn that,” you offer her a piece of advice and take a deep breath before you walk away from her, catching Helaena approaching the Godswood.

“Your Grace,” you greet her and curtsy.

Helaena curtsy back. “Your Grace,” she says back with a tiny smile. “You are Regent now.”

You scoff in amusement and see her pass her focus to Alicent. “Mother,” she greets. “I hope I am not interrupting.”

You shake your head. “No, we just got done talking.”

Helaena hums and her eyes drift back to you. “I was hoping we could take a stroll to talk. Are you busy?”

You beam at her and shake your head. “Nope, the rest of my day is open, so I’m all yours,” you assure her and skip over to her to fall at her side and guide her away. Yet before she can walk with you she bids her mother a goodbye.

“I will see you later.”

Alicent offers her daughter a sweet smile and redirects a short goodbye, letting Helaena then give most of her attention to you, and little attention to where you walk. And it’s good that she does because the truth is, you don’t pay much mind to where you walk, you just walk with your shadows trailing behind you.

“Have you thought of any names for the twins?” Helaena wanders.

You clasp your hands behind you and sigh. “I have thought of them, but I am still indecisive.”

Helaena hums and then turns her head to look at you with excitement. “When I was expecting the twins I was really eager to think of names. I remember. So perhaps I can give you some ideas, like, Shiera, or Gael for girls and for boys maybe Laenor, like your father.”

You blink repeatedly and a sweet and tender smile spreads on your lips. “Yes, I think Laenor would be a perfect name…if I have a boy…you don’t happen to know do you?” You try and probe, making her look away and lose herself in the distance.

“No,” she says thoughtfully. “My dreams…well…I can’t really conjure up what to dream. Do you understand? It all just comes when it wants.”

You follow her line of gaze and hum in comprehension. “It must be heavy. Knowing so much stuff, I mean.”

Helaena blinks and her eyes fall to her hands. “Well…I have had them since I can remember, so the weight is not something I feel anymore.”

You look at her with slight pity, but she looks at you with a very faint smile. “But that’s why I like going on dragonback, I feel free in a lot of ways when I’m in the sky with Dreamfyre. That’s why I liked it when we went flying together. Will we be able to fly together soon, do you think?”

You see the hope clinging to her eyes. You see the desire to have something not tainted by this war. And it makes it hard to be honest, but you can’t lie either. “I hope so. I miss flying without worrying that I’ll hit the blockade, or run into armies of men ready to shoot down my dragon, or me,” you don’t avoid the truth, even as bleak as it sounds.

“Maybe once this war is over and we don’t have to worry about coming across angry people, then we can fly as freely as we want and land on a small Island where we can swim, and watch the sunset. Now that our children have dragons of their own,” you muse with a grin.

Yet Helaena fails to mirror that hopeful joy, or any joy at all, her eyes remain downcast, but this time a small frown curls on her lips and her eyebrows knit together.

“Are you…okay?” You press carefully, gaining her immediate attention as if caught by surprise.

“Yes,” she answers bluntly.

You search her gaze, but like many times before, you can’t read her. You wish you could, you wish you could know all that she knows but you also know that if you did your mind would collapse with all that knowledge, and it would probably cease to exist. So you leave it untouched and leave it up to her to share what she wants or deems significant.

Thus you move on to a peaceful silence you both don’t mind being wrapped in. There does come times when you comment something to each other, but it’s never heavy, it’s lighthearted to be able to escape from the wrath and find peace with each other.

There’s also never a sign of a grudge from her since you are Regent now. She actually thanks you for taking the attention away from her and says if she could, she would give you the title to return to her humble living as a princess. But she can’t do such a thing so she gives you her thanks instead and adds that she’s also grateful that she feels tranquil when you’re with each other, causing you to think that if you had a sister you would want her to be as gentle and sweet as Helaena.

Actually, Helaena is like a sister to you. She might be older than you, but she feels like a little sister you must protect at all costs. You want to shield her from this terrible world the same way you want to shield your little brothers.

She’s too fragile and good for this world, you want to protect her from that, but you also want her to fight, to grow thorns like a fragile rose so she’s not so easily plucked. But alas you know a lot of people can’t and aren’t like that and that’s okay too. You’ll protect her regardless, you’ll be the thorns to her rose. A fire a dragon breathes, and the sharp teeth they bear. Just for her.

——

*LATER*

Whilst on your stroll with Helaena, you found yourself near the roofs where Aemond and you would escape to when you were kids, where all you had at that moment was each other's company, and you couldn’t stop thinking of those sweet moments when everything was much more simple. Maybe that’s why later that same day you found yourself sitting on the roof watching the sun set so peacefully as if it doesn't hide tragedy on its horizon, and hoping that you could still grasp onto those simple times even if you know they’re nothing but a memory now.

“Aren’t you cold?” A soft voice cuts in through the chilly air. “With your back exposed like that?”

You must have summoned Aemond with your mind, or perhaps you just missed each other when you came up to the roofs and he went to your chambers.

“Beauty is pain,” you remark with a cheeky grin. “You of all people should know that. Tell me, how painful is it being so beautiful?” You lull out cheekily, and when you look over your shoulder you catch a rosy blush on his cheeks that makes you grin and feel accomplished.

“No, but really,” you scoff and look back at the bleeding sunset. “I don’t mind it much.”

“Is it that warm flesh of yours?” He quips but also wonders out of curiosity.

You sigh deeply and wait until he’s sitting by you before you shake your head. “No. I just don’t mind the cold because I prefer less constrictive gowns. Why?” You roll out and tilt your head to the side to look at him with a pressing gaze. “Am I exposing myself too much for your liking husband?”

Aemond rolls his eye but doesn’t actually argue to prove you wrong.

“It’s not like what I say will stop you from wearing what you like,” he mutters to the part of the sky that’s already littered with stars.

“Nope,” you deadpan. “And it doesn’t seem like you mind them much when you’re gawking at me.”

Aemond scoffs and you look over at him with a smirk twitching on your lips. He then slowly drifts his eyes over to you and a smirk flashes on his lips before he smiles shyly at the book that you barely notice on his lap.

“I find you beautiful in everything you wear,” he says, making you giggle and drop your head on his shoulder—���I just don’t like when other people gawk. Like my uncle.”

“Your uncle is older than my mother,” you comment. “And thinks he’s younger than he is…no offense or anything.”

Aemond doesn’t argue in his uncle's defense so you continue.

“Don’t worry about anyone. I will only have eyes for you, and I will only be yours,” you finish in a whisper.

Aemond remains quiet and just presses a kiss on the top of your head without moving his lips away after that moment. He keeps his lips and nose nuzzled against your head and now admires the same blazing horizon you do, going unaware of your current desire to grasp at some reminder of the simple times to relive them just for a little bit. You want to live back in those moments for a while, you long for it, but you also figure out that it’s something that you can’t fight to get back. You can only reminisce and live through what life has to offer you now.

“Aemond,” you whisper shakily and want to pull away to meet him in the eye, but you’re also afraid of what you’ll see, so you stay as you are and watch as the horizon gets distorted with tears that build in your eyes. “Are you scared…of me? Of what I can do?”

Right away he sees that any hesitation will make you doubt and make you question everything about yourself, so he answers right away without an ounce of deceit. “No, should I be?”

You shake your head lightly and whisper. “No. I don’t want you to be.”

“I’m not,” he presses so you can finally cement that in your heart and stop overthinking.

“Good,” you whisper that to yourself before you finally decide to touch on the unspoken subject. “I would have said something if I knew what I was, or why I can’t be hurt by fire. I’ve been trying to look into it, but I cannot find anything. I wanted to find what I could be before I told anyone so I didn’t seem mad. Do you understand?”

Aemond hums and lingers in his silence before he pulls away and pushes the book towards you. “It was one of my father's books Aegon had stashed.”

You look at Aemond with awe because that’s all that befalls you at that very moment as you come to realize that he’s been trying to read more into what you could be, or what could have led to you being immune to fire.

You didn’t even ask him to do it.

“I could not find much, I’m sure there’s something in Dragonstone, or somewhere lost in the world, but what I did find…” he continues to make your heart dance, and your love for him to grow. “…was that our Valyrian ancestors would practice blood magic in Old Valyria, I’m sure it came from something magic-related.”

You scoff and finally tear your eyes off him to look at the pages you flip through. “So I’m cursed?”

“No,” Aemond quickly scoffs and looks at the pages you’re going through. “You are not hurt by fire, I would not call that being cursed. I think it makes you special,” he speaks softly and full of fascination, and as soon as you catch that oozing off his voice you stop flipping through the pages and slowly look at him with relief, disbelief, and just utter awe that he doesn’t shame you and proves what you saw that night right.

He sees you. He knows you’re something so much more, something important and that can mean so much.

Albeit at this very moment he is averting your gaze out of timidness, proving Alicent’s fears wrong. He’s no monster, and it’s sad that she thinks that.

“You think so?” You still ask for reassurance.

Aemond’s gaze lingers on the page before he slowly meets your gaze with a soft smile and adoration that makes his blue eye soft and easy to get lost in. “I know it. I’m certain of it.”

Your heart flutters, causing your lips to tremble as happy tears fill your eyes.

Sure perhaps if you confided in your mother or someone else you trust they too would say a variation of the same thing, but there’s something about not having to tell Aemond, about him discovering it for himself that makes this so much more special, and so much more tender. If only you knew what was really rushing through his mind, you would have probably collapsed or had some heart attack.

And he wants to tell you every feeling that’s making his heart mad with more love and lust, but he keeps it all in to avoid sounding mad to you. He doesn’t want you to think he’s mad, even if you probably wouldn’t, he doesn’t tell you how special you both are because he rides the largest dragon and you have fire-made flesh.

You both are Regents now too. You are both ruthless, you are both called for greater deeds, you both are greater than those below you, and you are one in the same now. He used to think that before but now…now you are one.

That’s what he thinks…

“I’m glad you think so,” you mumble and reach your hand over to cup his jaw and caress his cheek with your thumb as you just relish in how grateful you are that he understands and that he looks at you with admiration and love rather than fear.

“And thank you for trying to look for an answer,” you add. “It means a lot.”

He brings his hand up to cup yours and caresses your knuckles while he just stares at you in awe.

“You are special,” he makes it clear to you and your dancing heart swooning for him. “You always have been special to me.”

You lean in but don’t press your lips against his right away. You stop to smile in relief first before you close that distance with a slow and passionate kiss that you both find sync in quickly and move like you’re starving for each other's taste.

It’s no wonder why you came out with a child 4 months after having your first son. Neither of you can keep your hands off each other, or keep your lips from molding into each other. And now with you both being regent and the discovery of this gift, you find a new and hotter vigor for each other.

Yet neither of you get carried away right then at that moment. You pull away after a while to catch your breaths and press your forehead against his to avoid losing contact.

Rather than basking in the silence that the night has to offer on the roofs, you find words to share through your heavy breaths. “Will you let me fight now? I don’t want to be sitting here waiting to hear news. I want…I want to fight on my dragon. I don’t have to fight on the ground, just let me be on Astraea. We can help. Please,” you beg and stroke his cheek.

Aemond licks his lips and peels away to meet your waiting gaze. He parts his lips, but nothing comes out but hesitation that you quickly rebuttal

“At least when we’re together then,” you try to lure him to agree. “So you can be there if anything does happen. Please. I won’t get burnt, you know that. I will wear armor. And Astraea will keep me safe.”

Aemond’s eye drifts down to your belly, so you grab his hand and press it against you. “We will be fine,” you insist. “I will be fine.”

Aemond looks up at you and clenches his jaw as he stares hard, but after a while, he sighs and gives you his answer. “Fine.”

You flash him a beaming grin before you throw your arms around him and thank him by whispering in his ear over and over again.

“Any sign of any greater danger and you’re out do you understand?” He makes sure to let you know harshly. “I will throw you over my shoulder or have you taken like you’re captive, do you understand? I am not risking your life.”

You chuckle and pull your head back but keep your arms wrapped around him to assure him. “I understand.”

Aemond groans and you give him a peck on his lips and mutter against them. “<I love you.>”

Aemond holds your gaze and pouts with discontent because you just completely defeated him, but you don't care, you brush him off to steal another kiss from him, causing him to pull away.

You ignore his frustration and flash him a smug smile before you push the book away to shift around and lay on your back with your head on his lap to be able to look up at the stars that paint the night sky. Now you know that you can’t stay up here forever, no matter how much you want to avoid this war, but there’s nothing wrong with stealing a moment for yourselves under the twinkling stars, and the bright full moon.

“I’m here,” you start to reminisce. “And I can’t help but think about how I wanted to escape. How I wanted to be somewhere else…” you trail off and Aemond rests his hand on your arm that you sling over your chest. “And if you told me that you wanted to leave right now, I would grab Aerion and I would leave with you,” you admit, making him steal a glance at you.

“But,” you add. “I like to think I have matured out of that desperate desire.”

There’s nothing Aemond can really say in response, there’s nothing you want him to say so you appreciate his silence before you finally tear your eyes away from the stars that kept you captive, and look at him with a hint of sadness, but also like you’re somewhere far.

“Do you want to know what else I dreamed about when I would find myself alone here…or anywhere?”

Aemond hums to probe so you do just that, you continue softly, ever so feathery, enchantingly so. “I would dream of being Queen.”

It’s something you knew you wanted. It’s something he knew you almost had.

it was there at your reach, but it was taken away. You have never admitted it to him, your deepest desire until now. “I wanted the power,” you say like you’re reciting the most beautiful poem. “Did that make me selfish? Power-hungry? No, I never thought of it that way because I deserved it.” You nod softly and he looks deep into your soul with a softening gaze. “It was my destiny. I wanted to be like Good Queen Alysanne, like Queen Rhaenys the Conqueror. I dreamt of it, I pictured myself as Queen. I wanted to be good, I imagined I would be even though it could never be mine.”

You sigh shakily and look up at the sky as if you’re searching for that dream again amongst the stars.

“As I got older that desire turned to anger and resentment, but I was taught not to be angry about it and many things. And I was never angry at my mother or my brother, I was angry at the people who said that I couldn’t have it. I am still angry to this day. It’s deep inside me, but I still am because they took it,” you sneer but not with a loud rage, you are still soft-spoken, like you’re more sad than angry.

“And they made me feel weak,” you say between a grimace and a tremble in your voice, which Aemond catches. He catches every emotion, he’s captivated by every word and stuck on the tears that roll down your cheeks.

“They made me feel like I didn’t belong,” you continue. “Because if I’m the oldest and not my mother's heir then why? Why am I here? They…made me feel like I needed to prove myself to be something every day of my life…” you trail off and he finds tears creeping in his eye too. He finds that his throat stings because he felt what you did too when he had no dragon. Even now when he does, that need to prove himself still lingers just like it does in you.

“I understand,” he admits above a whisper, pulling your teary eyes back to him to look deep into his soul that cries as it feels understood, and as you prove to him that you are one in the same. That you were always meant to burn together—“I understand the feeling.”

You sit up and cup his cheek to wipe away his stray tear, and he mirrors your actions to wipe away the tears that roll down your own cheeks.

“But now I ride the biggest dragon,” he continues with a ferocity that he was quick to find. “And you,” he muses. “You are not hurt by fire. You are unburnt. We are Regents. We have the power, we do not need to prove anything to anyone. Not anymore. The world is ours now. We don’t have to be belittled by it anymore.”

You offer him an admiring smile and shake your head. “I don’t need the world to be mine,” you confess. “I have you, Aerion, my dragon, and the twins. That’s all I need. I am content. That’s my fight now. The power as Regent is an added bonus, I like it and if I were to have more I would make the most of it, but I am content now with you, and the little blessing you gave me.”

Aemond parts his lips, but he’s at a loss for words. All he can continue doing is admire you; your divine beauty, the sweet smile on your perfect lips, the tears that still trail down your perfectly sculpted face, and the love and awe in your eyes that make them gleam beautifully.

He really wants to say something, but he’s left knowing that all that he is, all that he wants to be, and all that he wanted to be, exists there with you.

He exists only for you, for his son, for his mother and sister, but you hold a special place in his heart because you continue to see him. You understand his conflicted soul more than anyone and he appreciates that understanding, and thanks it with kisses, with deep and passionate kisses that lead to neither of you wanting to part. They engulf you both with desire that takes you back to your chambers where you demand to be alone even if that sends your son away to different chambers.

Your passion drives you mad with lust and with the need to please each other in different ways. Your heated passion leaves you unsatisfied after one round and makes you want more and more until you're both exhausted, but completely full and happily satisfied.

Sleep came to be quite minimal after. Your days start earlier now, but you both found yourselves awake so you filled the silence while you waited for the day to get started for you.

He mostly complained though, but you don’t mind. You like that he shares his complaints with you.

“Lord Jason is just scared, it’s normal,” you try to ease the crease that forms between his brows. “He’s never fought a war, he’s scared.”

Aemond shakes his head and parts his lips to argue but you cut him off to get your point across. “With that said, am I excusing how lazy he’s being? No. He’s being too lenient and not taking it as seriously as he should. The boost in power has gotten to his head.”

Aemond sighs deeply and mutters. “He's only head of the army because of his brother, I would have chosen someone else for the job, someone who doesn’t need me to go to his rescue to get the job done sooner.”

You stop tracing circles on the mattress and snicker before you tilt your head up to steal a glance at Aemond. “I hear he’s taken lions with him,” you add with a teasing smile growing on your lips. “What exactly are they supposed to do?”

Aemond crosses his arms over his bare chest and mutters. “They want to be like us. They want to rule the land because they see we rule the sky.”

You shift your head down on your palm and giggle. “Them and their golden lions are funny. They believe their golden lions are like our dragons, but they can’t stand on the clouds, they roll in the dirt and call those clouds.”

Aemond chuckles, and as you lay on your side with your head resting on your propped-up hand, you slide your hand over his torso. “With a lion, if you turn your back, they dig their claws in you, no matter how long you’ve raised them. With dragons, you bond with them and they will forever be bound to your soul, they are a part of your soul. So no matter how hard they all try, no house will ever reach us as long as our dragons live.”

Aemond hums, and you press your fingers on his torso before you slide them over and look up with a slightly narrowed look. “That’s why you need to remind this Lord Lion that he’s no one to be ordering you or anyone else around. If he’s a coward who needs a security blanket to fight then tell him you will find someone else who can.”

“And if Daemon does decide to meet them in battle?” Aemond does let you hear some of his doubt, and as possible as it is, you doubt he will. At least you hope he won’t, there’s other battles to fight with Caraxes, it doesn’t seem like he’d be bothered to fight against Lord Jason unless they’re desperate or want an easy win.

“Then he meets them, but I doubt that Daemon will bother to fight any Lannister army. If it was Ser Criston then yes, I would say you should worry, but it’s not, so I would not give it a second thought. He'll send another army to fight for him.”

Aemond nods gently in comprehension and you stare at him for a lingering moment with a growing smile before you climb up the bed to be face to face. “Will you miss me at today's small council meeting?”

Aemond lazily hangs his arm over your waist and glances down at your lips. “Well, I’ll have to be stuck staring at old men and toads so yes.”

You laugh and query. “Toads?”

“Lord Larys.”

You snort and smack his shoulder. “That’s…true,” you wanted to say it was rude but as you think about it now it’s true. “Well,” you roll out and scale your fingers up to caress his chest. “If you ever miss me throughout the day just come to our quarters I’ll be here all day getting my braids done.”

Aemond huffs softly and can’t help but cup your cheek, the same cheek that bears the scar he made six years ago, and hovers his thumb over the scar before he gently trails it.

“Just remember,” you speak softly and grab his hand. “Clear mind Aemond. Don’t let your anger blind you. I know sometimes the men around you can be irritating and all you want to do is lash out, but anger doesn’t work in this situation. It doesn’t work when it comes to planning, okay? Clear mind and hold your anger back for this, hm?”

Aemond doesn’t say anything in return, he just presses a kiss on the heel of your hand and you take that as a comprehensive response.

Not so much later Vanessa, Aerion’s wetnurse, and servants barge in and your lax morning is upturned to a rowdy morning and you know your day has kickstarted. No more rest, and there’s only a little privacy while you break fast, but that serenity is cut short soon thereafter by Aerion crying. At least this morning you could stomach—or the twins felt like letting you eat so you really take that as a positive first step of a good day. Or as good as a day can be nowadays.

Can you say the rest of the day you're going through is bad? No, mostly because when you’re in your chambers sometimes it feels like the day passes over you. The news doesn’t come to you right away, and since you aren’t going out of your way to seek it you have to wait for it to come to you. You live in a little bubble when days like today are spent surrounded by the four walls of your quarters. Do you mind it?

Not today. You enjoy basking in the obliviousness, you enjoy the escape, the serenity as Vanessa takes her time to carefully braid your white hair whilst you pass golden cuffs, and pearls that hang from rings so she can put them in your hair.

She doesn’t tug too harshly, she’s gentle, slow, and very intricate with each braid, and each placement of the pearls, and the cuffs, that you could fall asleep. Actually, sometimes you do find yourself dozing off while you’re reading, but mostly you sit in the serenity that obliviousness brings.

“Perhaps soon I can wear that gown from Yi-Ti, the sea green one that looks blue under certain lights?” You ask for an opinion. “That one is my favorite because of the black chest piece that comes with the cloak. It’s very…exquisite, and the embroidery on the sleeves and all the golden accessories it comes with,” you swoon. “I wish I lived there, I would need a castle just for my wardrobe!”

“You should see how they dress when the summer is at its peak,” Ser Jason cuts into the conversation. “The silks are truly…silk.”

You snort and look at him through the mirror as he puts down books you needed from the library, but couldn't get at this very moment.

“You’ve been to Yi-Ti?” You muse and get tempted to turn around, but Vanessa would scold you for moving so you just stare at the knight in awe and envy.

Ser Jason’s eyes flicker to the ground and he hesitates before he nods gently. “Yes, not long, but I’ve been at the peak of summer.”

Your smile slowly grows to a grin and you probe because that’s all you can do. “Is it as they say? Is it really so beautiful? Are there golden castles?”

Ser Jason chuckles and shakes his head as he keeps avoiding eye contact and stands incredibly still. “No, those are just tall tales, but they do have a lot of gold. Statues, the peak of roofs, and tapestries lined with beautiful golden threads that almost look like rich gold. And the food,” he sighs as if recalling the taste in his mouth.

“It’s otherworldly,” you let him keep filling your head with tales of his life, a life you wish you could live just to see those wonders he got to see with his own eyes. “I…I would love to describe it, but there’s truly no words I could use to describe how all those flavors dance on one's tongue.”

You nod gently and hope for more, but he looks at you through the mirror and falters. That confidence he garnered to speak of those marvels is lost and he’s reverted back to his stammering and timidness. “Of course, you…you should go witness it all for yourself. You would love it.”

That wonder twinkling in your eyes dims and your smile is not as sweet. “It’s easier said than done sadly. I have jewelry with rare gems from Yi-Ti, I have gowns made with their rich fabrics and designed by their creative minds, but that’s how far I go.”

“You'd think with all the money and privilege you wouldn’t let them tell you how to live your life,” he dares to say, causing your second sworn protector to peek his head inside after what he overheard, while you and Vanessa stiffen and look at the sudden bold knight.

“One would think,” you hit back and catch his eyes widening in shock as if he did not actually expect you to respond, or as if shocked about what came out of his mouth is true.

“But I am a woman, a princess, and the only daughter of a queen, my life has been planned since the moment I was born,” your voice goes hard and cold while your eyes express the same bitterness. “Stories and dreams are as far as I go.”

Ser Jason blinks repeatedly as his mouth is left agape. “I know women with just as much who left it all behind to find a lot more riches in accomplishing their dreams.”

Your eyes flicker to a glare, but tears break through as you slowly come to realize that all you have is dreams of grand places and grand adventures. There’s nothing you can do but dream again. He returns that cruel reminder to your mind.

“Thank you, Ser,” you dismiss him and avert your gaze so you don’t know how he reacts, you just know Ser Cane Clegane steps in to watch the knight walk out before closing the door and leaving Vanessa and you alone once again. Now though the serenity you once relished is a dream too.

“Princess,” Vanessa whispers with traces of pity, so you quickly shut her down.

“I’ve been meaning to ask about the plans Mysaria sent?” You abruptly change the subject to something you did not want to touch just yet but have to now. “Are they ready?”

Vanessa glances back and makes sure the door is closed before she stops braiding your hair and leans down to whisper. “All done. The food will be sent later tonight and should arrive in the morrow.”

Food. That’s the plan your mother has so far. It’s an excellent plan in response to all the hungry smallfolk just wanting food but getting scraps or worse from their King, and Regent.

The smallfolk will know who to thank and start to look at your mother with hope for a change, which means they will do as she wants and gain their love and support.

“We will make sure to keep away from the city tomorrow then,” you say and watch Vanessa back up to continue doing what she was doing. “It will be chaos.”

She hums and only seconds later the doors get thrown open and in comes your beloved husband in a huff.

“What is it?” You ask right away as you notice his nose is flared and his jaw is clenched.

He doesn’t look injured so it doesn’t seem like he got hurt at the training yard or anywhere else for that matter. He looks pissed though, so something is bothering him.

“It’s,” he heaves. “Aegon. He’s awoken.”

You blink in disbelief. “But,” you shake your head. “The maester said there was little chance he would wake.”

Aemond lets out a heavy breath and walks up to your vanity to lean against it so you’re able to face him and his contorted face.

“So he said, but…it seems my brother beat the odds. He fought for once,” he grumbles and drops his glare on his fiddling hands, so you give Vanessa a break before you lean forward and place your hands over Aemond’s cold but soft hands.

“He still can’t walk, or probably stay awake for that long for that matter,” you try to make his mind clear of all the thoughts rushing behind his eye and clouding his mind. “He won’t be that competent.”

Aemond watches his thumb brush over your fingers and whispers. “And what he did to you while I was away? Does he get away with that?”

You secure your hold on his hand and pull his gaze to you, letting you offer him an assuring smile. “He won’t be as he was ever again. That’s enough justice.”

Yet you aren’t completely satisfied yet, but that’s something Aemond can’t fulfill. You have to. You will.

“Is it?” He asks as if he can read the thoughts in your mind.

You offer him a small but assuring nod that he takes to heart. “It is.” You try to assure him, but neither him nor you are left satisfied. Yet that’s not something either of you share, you just individually know you will selfishly reach for that piece of justice yourselves because you won’t be left savoring even a piece of it.

——

*LATER*

Aemond has been caught up handling some business you don’t care about so you take advantage of being left alone and go visit your King, since he’s awake now. What a miracle!

You just want to check on him, on his wounds and mental state. You want to give him your best wishes so he can have a quick recovery. That’s all.

You tell that to his Kingsguard protecting his chambers, but it’s not like they had any say in letting you in or not. They’re hesitant, they make excuses that he’s going to take milk of the poppy and fall asleep again, but you don’t care. You walk in with your long beautiful gown flowing behind you, and a golden candle handler in your hand to light your way.

Oh, and when you walk in you don’t forget to continue humming a haunting and menacing song that sends a chill down the spines of the servants and the Maesters tending to Aegon, while the king himself is confused. One could say he felt like he was dreaming, your humming was faint at first, but the haunting melody still managed to swirl in his ear. Even as your silhouette was beginning to get conjured up on the curtains covering his bed, he did not expect you to appear out of your own will.

Thus when the sheer curtains are slowly pulled to the side and you appear there like some haunting ghost, he still does not think you're real.

“Leave us,” you cut your humming off to demand the maesters and the servant girls away.

“But—” a maester tries to argue, but you snap your eyes to him and shoot him a menacing glare that shuts him up and makes him bow his head.

“I will give him the milk of the poppy,” you add to reassure the maester while you return your eyes to Aegon.

Once you know that the maesters and the servant girls are gone, you start humming again, but this time much more softer than before, making Aegon more convinced that you’re haunting his dreams.

He does watch you walk to him slowly with your eyes fixated on his flared scars still red and raw, but all he knows for sure is that his breathing is picking up while goosebumps crawl down his spine as he also feels captivated. Even more so when you come to a stop just under the moonlight that reflects inside his quarters.

The bright light completely captures you in its soft hue. It makes the golden cuffs, and the golden rings holding the pearls in your hair, glimmer, while your long silver-white hair itself almost gleams like thousands of pristine diamonds. And perhaps that's your only intention, just presenting yourself, he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know if you intend to smile at him either, but you do and his chambers now are completely silent, striking more fear to his heart.

Yet he still thinks he’s dreaming.

“Did it hurt?” You fill the silence with your question and study the part of his face that now is forever scared because of the dragonfire that feasted on his flesh.

“I have always wondered,” you continue in a sweet voice while you tilt your head up just slightly to look at the bald spot that now leaves part of his head naked. “I can gladly say that I have never been hurt by fire,” you reveal and bring your eyes back down to meet his gaze while you let your fingers graze the flames that you hold on your candles.

“I have never winced at the touch of candle fire, boiling water has never scolded my skin or my tongue. And never have I once been bothered by hearths or pyres whose flame grows too wild. So,” you roll out and take a seat beside him on the bed. “I always have wondered what it’s like to feel hurt by fire like you were.”

A smirk tugs on your lips and he realizes at this instant as the candlelight shows off your smirk, that this is no dream. You’re actually at his bedside looking at him the same way Aemond looked at him earlier today, like Aegon was nothing, like he wasn’t still king. You're looking at him as if was pathetic and nothing but someone to take pity on; he can see those thoughts playing behind your eyes and on the corner of your lips.

You were sitting, but you now cast a shadow over him that made his cower. The same way he made you feel not long ago when he visited your chambers while Aemond was gone.

But that was your intention, that’s why you’re here. You have the power now, it doesn’t matter if he’s king. You have the power and he knows it, he sees that darkness in your eyes the same way he saw it in Aemond’s eye.

“I would say it’s like drowning. You have that need to fight to survive, but,” you click your tongue and lean towards him, making him swallow back nervously and attempt to scoot away, but to no avail. He can’t move a muscle. “When the fire is eating away at your flesh I can’t imagine you can move all that much. You must be paralyzed, cut away from every message your head sends to your screaming muscles, hoping that your adrenaline can be your salvation, but all it can do is give you the power to cry and scream out your pain. Is that right, Aegon?” You direct the question at him and look at him not with curiosity but with a mocking look.

“Le…”

“Ah-ah,” you click your tongue and drag yourself closer to him to shush him. “Don’t waste your energy. It’s okay.”

You flash him another smile and hold his gaze as you push the melting candles toward his already scarred flesh, making him gasp and start to heave.

“I just want to see,” you mutter. “Maybe hear you whimper just a little to know what it’s like, you know? Live it through someone else.” You chuckle.

“Crazy bitch,” he manages to say and you slowly grin and manage to get the flames close to his skin, to the point the heat stings. Yet before the fire can actually give him a peck you pull the candles away and just keep smiling at him.

“It was a jest,” you giggle and slither your fingers up to play with the flames. “Laugh. You like jests don’t you?”

He wants to curl his lips to a scowl, but his lips just twitch in some feeble attempt.

“Hm. Well, that’s all,” you end his torture and push yourself to your feet.

Before you can walk out though, you put the candle stand down on the bedside table and grab the milk of the poppy.

“Oh! I almost forgot,” you interject and twirl around. “You are going to be an uncle to twins, is that not great? We’re hoping for girls now since we have our boy…” you trail off and lean towards him to bring the milk of the poppy to his lips. “…our heir.”

Aegon lips part to attempt to argue, but you take that as a need for his sedative, so you bring the cup to his lips and help him drink the milk of the poppy. Once the cup is empty you pull away and replace it with the candle stand.

“Goodnight, Aegon. Sweet dreams,” you tease and twirl back around to leave his chambers, but not without continuing to hum your haunting song that you make sure to travel with until you know that the king or his guards will hear you. After you put some distance and your humming doesn’t echo in their ears anymore you return to the safety of your chambers in silence.

After that, you hoped not to run into Aemond, or find him in your chambers. You just don’t want to be bombarded with questions, that’s all.

Nevertheless, luckily Aemond doesn’t join you in your shared quarters until several minutes later, so you’re spared. And since you were donning your nightgown by the time he walked in he didn’t even know you had just returned either, so unknowingly both of your visits to Aegon are unspoken of, you just individually relish in the torment you gave him. Which honestly doesn’t paint you as the most sane couple or people at all, but at least now your hunger for justice is satisfied.

That’s what lets you both actually find a peaceful sleep, that little win.

Little wins are all the rage in times like now, so you cherish them. Even if they’re small and insignificant. Even if they have nothing to do with war and battle and have everything to do with your day-to-day lives, you cherish them. You cherish good mornings too, simple ones.

Happiness is even simple when you’re not taking it for granted, and when you know where to find it, like, waking up and having Aemond lay his head on your belly in an attempt to be closer to the twins, or in Aerion tugging at Aemond’s hair and fighting him to actually copy his father and lay on you instead since he understands more now that he’s 5 months old.

You can find happiness in Aemond’s faint proud smiles as he hears his son try and talk to him. In gentle kisses and sweet compliments he passes you, or something minimal like agreeing on something at the Small Council meetings which in turn overshadows the men around the table. You can even find happiness after the meetings in matters such as names for the babes that still have a ways to go before they’re born.

Does he raise a complaint though? No. He’s not needed at this precise moment so he lets you steal his time.

“If they’re boys, Aemon,” you say right away and make him blink with surprise. “Like his father. Just without the last letter so it’s not confusing.”

The corner of his lips tugs wider as he lets out an amused huff.

“And the second boy's name…well…”

“Maegor?” Aemond tries to end your sentence, but you glare at him and shake your head.

“No!” You chuckle. “No, I am not naming our son Maegor. Do you want the gods to spite us?” You ask the question in a whisper in the fear that the gods will hear you saying such a name.

Aemond snickers and leans forward to press his hand on either side of your lap as you sit on the edge of the table, and he sits in his chair. “You believe that to be true? It’s just talk.”

You scoff and shake your head again to get your point across. “Talk or not, I will not leave it to chance. Not when it comes to our children.”

Aemond hums and you slowly lower your gaze to bring up the name Helaena suggested, one you want. “What about Laenor?”

You feel his stare weighing down on you, but you can’t look him in the eye out of fear of rejection.

“My father was always good to you. We would go fishing together, and he would take you sailing with us…I do not know if you want,” you bring up different cases to try and convince him because you know how Alicent and those of the court viewed your father.

“All right,” Aemond doesn’t take time to think about it, he gives in and you slowly trail your eyes up to meet his gaze with relief and happiness.

“Really?” You query.

Aemond nods and you flash him a joyous smile.

“But,” he interjects and sits back with a lighthearted smile. “What if they’re girls or one of the other?”

You flash him a smirk and lean back on your hands. “Well, we have our first name…”

“Daenys,” you both say at the same time and you nod excitedly and beam at him.

He hums with a smile playing on his lips and you tilt your head to the side to share the other name. “And the second, Naerys. Or Daenerys. You can choose.”

“They’re the same thing,” he mutters and you scoff and lean towards him.

“No! No, they're different. Completely! But you can choose between the two.”

He rolls his eye and quips. “How generous of you.”

You shrug innocently. “I’ll even let you choose between all four if we get a boy and girl, hm? So pick!”

He hums and taps his fingers on the chair's armrest before he takes a deep breath and shares his choice. “Daenerys and Aemon.”

A pang of pain hits your heart and your smile falls, he watches you with a serious look that shows he’s being serious, so you sit up and look at him as if the answer actually hurt you. “What?” You mutter in disbelief. “But, my love.”

He raises an eyebrow and remarks. “You gave me the freedom to choose the name of our children. I chose.” He says and leaves his lips pouted as he waits for your argument.

But he is right…

“Well,” you grumble without hiding your disapproval. “Fine,” you deadpan and look down to fiddle with a gold bead that’s embroidered on your gown.

Aemond tilts his head to try and find your eyes but you keep turning your head further down so you miss the smirk that tugs on his lips as he sees you pout.

“It was jest,” he clarifies as he stifles his laugh, and leans forward to press his fists on the table.

You raise your head and snap your glare at him. “Ha. It was not funny.”

He snickers and you nudge his shoulder. “Daenys has been my top choice since we were kids. You know that.”

He grins and nods. “I remember. You bugged me about it hundreds of times.”

“Exactly,” you press with your eyebrows raised. “So?”

He unfurls his fists and slides his hand on your thigh to rub it with the gentlest touch. “Daenys and Aemon,” he now gives his honest choices.

You nod and can’t help but throw your arms around his neck since he’s already so close, and glance at his lips, but manage not to give into your temptation, instead you smirk and whisper. “Do you think Daenys and Aemon will get into as much trouble as we did?”

He gently slides his hand up your thigh before he swings his arm around your waist and quips. “You got in trouble, not me. I was there to try and get you out of trouble, or danger.”

The corner of your lips spread up and bliss glimmers in your eyes. “Okay, but you did not discourage me.”

He narrows his gaze and counters. “I did, many times. You did not listen.”

You giggle and loll your head to the side, making his eyes follow your lips moving before he flickers his gaze back up.

“Well then Daenys and Aemon will learn to be better at avoiding trouble,” you rebuttal, making him scoff and not hold back anymore. He leans in for the kiss and you let him mold his lips into yours while you wrap your arms around his neck.

As he deepens the kiss he trails his hand away from your waist and agonizingly slowly drifts his hand down your hips, and then down the length of your thigh to hike your skirt up and slither his hand under to now slide his warm palm up your thigh, leaving a blazing trail that makes you press yourself closer to him to the point your chests meet with all the breaths you take.

You want him to touch you where your body aches for him the most, but he instead grabs your hips with both hands and with a swift and fluid motion slides you off the edge of the table to make you straddle his hips.

“Aemond,” you chuckle between heavy breaths, and he responds with a cheeky smirk before closing the small gap between your lips as if it were impossible to live for a second longer without the taste of your lips.

Yet no matter how hot your passion blazes, that is suddenly snuffed out by a knock on the door. Which you should’ve seen coming, you are in the Small Council chambers, but that doesn’t matter to Aemond, he still gets frustrated.

“What?” He seethes.

You can’t help your cocky smirk before you lean in and bite his bottom lip before moving over to sit on his lap to wait and watch who dared cut into your private moment.

When the intruder walks in though you see that it’s Ser Jason.

“Forgive me for interrupting,” he offers his condolences right away with a bow of his head. “I just received news,” he shares and brings his head up to display an almost terrified look. “A riot has started in the city where the Great Sept is, and Queen Helaena and the Dowager Queen are caught within.”

Your heart drops to your stomach and while you digest the news, Aemond basically rips away from his seat to try and go out to save them himself. However, no matter how rageful he is, or his thirst for blood, neither him nor you are allowed to run to their aid.

The smallfolk are angry, your mother and Mysaria’s plan worked. The smallfolk got the message that they were trying to get across and now they want an answer, justice for not getting treated right by the King ruling over them, the King who is supposed to feed them. And they have every right to be upset, to demand an answer for how poorly they’ve all been treated, but to take it out on Helaena? That’s something you can’t accept, that’s something that doesn’t sit right with you.

If only you had known that they planned to go to the city today, and you could’ve come up with some quick excuse to keep them inside. Anything to keep them from entering the wrath of the Smallfolk after they got the food from your mother. But you did not know, and now you can’t do anything to help Helaena but watch from a tall tower as a sea of people rush through the streets. All you’re left to do is wait, and hope that the Kingsguard can do their job, while your mind conjures up violent scenarios in response to your distress and…guilt.

Nevertheless, in response to your helplessness, and the panic that makes you breathe heavily, Astraea surprises you by flying over the tall tower Aemond and you stand on, and flying down, casting a large shadow over the streets of the city as she directs herself to the Great Sept, without as much as you needing to tell her a word.

And since she is large and her purple scales stand out against the sun, you see her swoop down on a building near the Great Sept. Albeit since you can't see what she sees, you miss the fact that she was quick to find Helaena and Alicent. You miss the warning shouts from the people who had caught her flying over in a hurry, but thanks to the calamity no one paid attention to the warnings, no pair of angry eyes caught even a glimpse of the purple dragon until her shadow cast over the crowd trying to tear at Alicent and Helaena.

Even then it's too late because by the time she lands on the edge of a building, Helaena and Alicent have been pushed against, Astraea is quick to react in defense of Helaena; the person your heart is crying over at the moment, the person you hope and pray is okay, and the person you love with all your heart.

There’s no doubt she’s there defending her because even from the tower Aemond and you stand on in the Red Keep, Astraea’s rageful roar is heard. And from where Helaena and Alicent are, her roar rattles the foundations of the buildings, it shakes the pebbles on the ground, and sets fear in the people who were just brave enough to go after the Queen and her mother.

Now those people who ran at the Queen, run away from the dragon ducking her neck and head down to shield her from any incoming danger. When someone ballsy enough tries to take a step close to Helaena, Astraea begins to snarl before she opens her mouth and snaps at them, coming close to actually taking a bite, but not managing to scrape them.

She just wanted to scare them, she wouldn’t actually bite anyone unless provoked by someone. She just has her guard up and is being protective. And she doesn’t lose that fierce need, she continues to bear her teeth until she spots Alicent rushing Helaena to the wheelhouse. After that Astraea hovers above the wheelhouse and doesn't part from them until she sees them go past the Red Keep gates because that’s the only time that you actually find relief.

After that Astraea circles the castle until you’re inside tending to a distressed Helaena, while her mother gets tended to as well, albeit she actually ended up getting cut, Helaena is just shaken up and a bit dirty, that’s all, but you still help her as you swallow back your guilt.

After all, you can’t control the Smallfolk, you can’t control their emotions. You just wish you would have known Alicent wanted to take Helaena into the city. That’s all.

“Do you want to know something?” You ask Helaena.

She hums and you share your thoughts while you wipe away the dirt her face collected in that riot. “I admire you for having twins. You were young too, I can’t imagine it was easy. I don’t know how you did it.”

Helaena’s eyes flicker to you and she looks at you seriously before she interjects bluntly. “I just had them.”

You stop what you’re doing and drop your gaze to look at her with slight disbelief before you snort softly and move behind her to undo her messed-up braids.

“I…will have to go thank Astraea,” Helaena speaks up much to your surprise, since up until now it was you who was trying to make conversation. “She protected me and my mother.”

You smile proudly. “We can go after this, how about that? She should be nestled up by the cove.”

Helaena nods gently, and the door proceeds to open, causing Helaena to ball her hands, and grow stiff after having a very hard time relaxing. Which is why you get ready to kick the intruder out, but you then come to see Aemond striding in.

“What is it? Have the rest of the Kingsguard returned?” You can’t help but ask as you grab the brush from the small table.

“All but one,” he says as he looks down at his sister unable to find that peace once again.

“Did you find out what exactly happened?” You act clueless whilst you start brushing Helaena’s hair. “What started the riot?”

Aemond walks over and chooses to lean against the couch to be able to occasionally meet your gaze when you’re not focusing on what you’re doing.

“It was Rhaenyra,” he says, causing chills to crawl down your spine at the sound of your mother’s name coming out of his mouth out of slight fear he will reveal that he knows the letters you have been sending her— “she sent food in boats which in turn made the people get mad at us. As if we’re the ones holding the blockade.”

You don’t give any other reactions besides comprehension and feigned disbelief, as if this is the first time hearing about your mother’s malicious plans.

“Well,” you sigh and pretend to breathe out a stressed-out breath at the mention of your mother. “We are the crown. We’re supposed to be taking care of them. How would you react if you could not feed your son because the people who are meant to protect you aren’t doing anything to break that blockade or feed them?”

Aemond’s gaze hardens, but you don’t back down, you challenge him and press your point so he can understand where their anger is coming from.

“They’re desperate, angry, and what my mother sent only fueled them to act out in the only way they would be heard,” you argue in their defense, making Aemond drop his head and shake it in disapproval.

“We’re trying,” he snaps and hastily brings his eye up, but you’re focused on brushing Helaena’s long hair so you just feel his burning glare.

“They do not know that,” you rebuttal. “We know that here, but they do not. Look I am not telling you what to do Aemond, I am just trying to make you see why they reacted the way they did.”

He hums and you finally drift your eyes up and watch him lose his gaze on the ground to try and collect all his thoughts on the matter and on what you just told him.

“I’m all done Helaena,” you direct your attention back to her and back away to give her space. “Why don’t you change into something different, finish your tea and when you’re done, or when you want, we can go see Astraea, hm?”

Helaena nods while you walk around her to face her with a gentle smile. “You’re okay now, okay? No one is going to hurt you here.”

Her distant blue eyes meet yours and you see her fear still clinging onto her, so you attempt your best to try and rid her of that agonizing fear. But you’re also careful, you know how she is, you know she doesn’t really like being touched, nor does she tolerate any loud noises. You also know she’s still rattled and a bit paranoid that the chaos will find her in her chambers, so you’re slow as you crouch to not trigger her. You let her know in a whisper that you’re going to grab her hands before you cradle them.

“You’re okay,” you make sure to say in a gentle and caring voice so she can feel assured, so she knows that you do care about her wellbeing.

“I know,” she nods stiffly and turns your hands around to study your palms for a moment before her thumb hovers over the ice burn you carry and reminds you of what you left behind.

“I will only leave until you assure me you’re fine,” you tell her.

She draws in a deep breath while stealing a glance at her brother behind you who is paying close attention to the gentle way you’re caring for her sister. He would say perhaps you’re coddling her too much considering her age, but he also appreciates that you don’t shame her for not being the fighting type. He likes that you’re so doting and sweet with Helaena.

While Helaena herself catches that appreciation in his eye as you hold his attention captive, and wonders how you must feel that he can’t share even an ounce of care for your own siblings. She actually wonders a lot about you when you plague her dreams, she wants to tell you all that she sees about you, you and Aemond, you and…your future, but her words don’t come easy, so she’s left silent and just staring hoping that somehow someone can read what she’s thinking.

She wishes you could see that she is indeed fine, but that doesn’t come easy either with her look still captured with fear, thus she looks back at you and gives you what you asked for. “I’m fine.”

You hesitate just in case she ends up changing her mind, but when she doesn’t follow up with a protest, you draw out a deep breath of your own and stand to your given height to step away from her. “We’ll be in the Red Keep and I’ll be waiting, okay?” You let her know, making her offer you a quick nod that seems like she’s brushing you off more than anything, but you and Aemond still leave and let her be.

And it’s only once the doors of her quarters are closed that you speak on the matter at hand. “What will you do with the Kingsguard?” You ask since Alicent said they escalated what was already happening. Or they gave the people an excuse to get violent.

“Aegon's friends are the ones who triggered the smallfolk to attack when one of them cut off a man’s arm,” he grumbles in frustration. “Which I can’t say surprises me, they have been incompetent since the start, they’ll serve better as dragon fodder, but alas, men of the Night's Watch are here, so I thought of having them banished there.”

“Hm, I think that’s an excellent response to their actions,” you praise his thought. “The Night's Watch is always in need of men, especially now that winter is around the corner.”

He hums and his eye then falls on you. At first, you don’t notice, don’t feel his stare because you’re in your own mind, but as your gaze drifts to the side you catch his stare before he can look away.

Any other time you would have brushed him off, but in contrast to that hard and blazing glare moments ago, now his eye is softer, and his blue eye isn’t clouded by the darkness of his anger.

“What?” You query.

He blinks and looks ahead before he mutters. “You just would have been good at it. Being Queen.”

Out of all the times you have confessed that dream, that desire to someone, the response is always the same. They always just take it as a passing thought, as a forgotten dream you just let them know about. Aemond is different though, he’s the first one to validate that desire, that forgotten dream still very much alive in the depths of your soul.

Is it in response to try and be something special in your mother’s eyes and those who forbid you from having such a dream become a reality? Who knows, but it still lingers there and he grasps onto it, and starts to pull it out of the abyss.

You know you shouldn’t keep dreaming, you should let go of his hand to let that dream fall back into the depths of the abyss where it will be forgotten once again, but…how can you let a hand go when it’s pulling you towards a glorious light?

A part of you wants to be free from the abyss, but as you’re blinded with clarity you think about your mother and your brother, and you can’t fathom ever betraying them like that. Your path is set already, and you can’t let it crumble and destroy what you worked hard to pave. You can’t turn your back on your mother over a dream that’s out of reach, that you had once been okay with letting go of.

You have to let go and stop being so hopelessly foolish, even if the temptation is hard not to cave into.

Thus you take Aemond’s compliment with a graceful smile and add nothing else on the matter even if your heart is swooning.

Thankfully he doesn’t add to the matter so you’re saved from further temptation. Instead, you follow him to the courtyard where Aegon’s Kingsguard friends are pushed to their knees, scared and nervous without a doubt over what fate the Prince regent will bestow upon them.

“Kneel before the Prince Regent Aemond Targaryen!” A guard announces as he and you descend the stairs to the courtyard, side by side. “And his lady wife, the Princess Regent…” he trails on to say your name.

Rather than sticking by Aemond’s side and watching the sentence he will give the Kingsguard though, your eyes go wide with glee as you spot an old, old friend from your time as a ward to Lady Karstark.

“Ser Mattias,” you whisper in disbelief and pick up your skirt to rush over to him and forget about your husband and the trial he’s conducting.

“Princess,” Ser Mattias greets with disbelief as he realizes that it’s really you.

“What a joy it is to see you, and,” you pause and study his all-black attire which differs wildly from the last time you saw him sporting bright white and typical greys and blacks with the sigil of his lady's house. “…All in black.”

Ser Mattias scoffs and tilts his head down to take a look at his own attire as if taking note of what he sports now, and what it means.

“And you,” he redirects and looks back at you to bow his head, making his long, dark locks dip with him. “Princess Regent, and…” he trails off to glance over your shoulder. “Weighed down by shadows.”

You glance at your sworn protectors before you pass Ser Mattias a smile. “It’s good to see you old friend, but I have to ask why you’re all in black now.”

Ser Mattias shifts on his feet and sighs. “After Lord Bennard tried to usurp Lord Cregan, I took the mantle as a brother of the Night's Watch. Perhaps I did serve his lady wife, but I still served their house,” he shakes his head gently. “I could not stand behind the treason, the sully to their name.”

You sigh and look at him with pity. “But Ser it was not your fault, Ser Bennard’s choices were his own. Not yours.”

“It does not matter, Princess, I could not stand for it. Nor did I have a home to return to, thus I joined the Night’s Watch and I’m better because of it,” he explains, letting you fall silent as you come to understand his reasoning, while also starting to wonder about someone after he mentioned his name.

First, though you make sure Aemond is still distracted with the sentencing before you casually bring him up since it’s not out of the ordinary. “An army from the North marches South, and their Lord leads them.”

A faint smile spreads on Ser Mattias' chapped lips and he nods stiffly. “Aye, I have heard. We will cross paths if the Gods let us.”

You nod slowly in comprehension and peek over at Aemond to keep making sure he’s distracted before you bring him up since you know you can trust Ser Mattias. “If you could Ser, pass a message to Lord Stark, for me?”

The man doesn’t react as you thought he would, nor should you have expected him to in truth. He and many others knew Cregan and you were great friends. You’re just overthinking.

“Of course. You and Lord Stark are still friends?” He asks and you nod before you pass him the message before Aemond can interrupt.

“Tell him…I’m okay. I'll be okay, and if the Gods are generous perhaps we’ll join each other on the battlefield.”

Ser Mattias shows he understands with a nod before he confirms his comprehension out loud. “I will give him the message.”

You let out a deep breath and nod your head before you step back and peer over your shoulder, catching at that moment, Aemond’s eye find you before he makes his way over with his hands behind his back, his head high, his back straight, and his chest puffed out as if trying to scare away the old man sworn to chastity.

“My Prince,” Ser Mattias greets and bows his head.

You pull on a smile and wait for Aemond to fall by your side before hooking your arm around his. “My love, this is Ser Mattias, he was Lady Karstark’s sworn protector when I was her ward.”

“Aye,” the man agrees. “I watched the Princess grow up for three years of her life, and grow from disdaining the North to falling in love with it.”

You giggle and Aemond crosses an arm over his chest to grab your hand as if trying to prove something to the man before him.

“She will be able to tell you the dire need of men in the Night's Watch,” Ser Mattias makes sure to take advantage of Aemond’s presence to ask for capable bodies. “Winter is coming and the threats will worsen. So please, any prisoners you may have rotting in your dungeons, send them to us.”

You glance over at Aemond and watch him offer the man a stiff comprehensive nod before he finally breaks his silence. “I will keep it in mind, Ser. Now I’m sure you have a long journey ahead of you, and prisoners who already require your attention.”

You shoot Aemond an annoyed side eye while you slowly slip your arm away from his. Albeit he refuses to let you go, so he discreetly tugs your arm back to keep you interlocked.

“My Prince,” the man bids his farewell with a small bow. “My Princess, it was an honor seeing you again.”

“And you, Ser,” you redirect softly. “Safe travels on your way back to the Wall.”

“Thank you.” He nods and without another word turns to follow his brothers out the gates. Aemond then turns away without letting go of you so you can stick at his side as if you will wander away or get lost on your way back inside the Red Keep.

Does that stop you from peering back at the man already paces away?

No, you still peer over your shoulder not because you long to leave too, not because you will miss the man, but because you know he will see Cregan...

——

*SOMETIME LATER*

“Lord Ormund Hightower makes slow progress.” Lord Lord Jasper shares what he knows. “There is great concern that his host is threatened on two fronts by armies allied with House Beesbury.”

Something that has caught your attention about this faction is that these great armies surely do complain a lot. You don’t remember men fighting for your mother complaining or asking for more assistance for a threat that has not hit them yet.

How annoying.

“However,” the lord continues over the ruckus that comes from the streets below and is actually loud enough that you hear it from the room. “In happier tidings, Prince Daeron’s dragon, Tessarion, has at last taken to wing—“

“Eyes on the horizon!” A distant shout starts to steal your attention.

“Your brother expects to join the fight soon—”

“Dragon!”

It can’t be Astraea, they would not make any commotion for her anymore. And Vhagar wouldn't alarm them either, so is it Sunfyre? Has he returned?

“…and when he does, the Hightower host will be unstoppable,” Lord Jasper tries to talk over the commotion, but that only turns to panic.

“Dragon! Inside! Now!”

Can it be your mother? Or daemon? Both?

Aemond turns his gaze to you and you both speechlessly come to the same conclusion that the panic is caused by an unknown dragon, there isn’t any other explanation for such a commotion, so you both rip away from your chairs and stride out to the balcony, where you see all the chaos first hand.

Like when they threatened Astraea when you first got to the city, now all the guards on the walls collect all their courage and point at a large dragon. One you can’t make out right away, but as it flies toward the city at great speed you instantly recognize the spectacular beast.

“Silverwing,” you announce her presence breathlessly as your mind wanders to who her rider might be. Is it Rhaena?

Last you heard of her she went to the Vale, but she could have gone back to Dragonstone, this might be her…

But why would she come to King's Landing alone?

There doesn’t seem to be any other dragons so it’s safe to assume Silverwing is alone, so why would Rhaena fly here?

Unless…it’s someone else? Who though? You need to know.

Nevertheless, once again Aemond seems to be interlinked with your current running thoughts because without sparing another moment he pushes himself away from the railing and twirls around to storm away.

He doesn’t ask for you to come but you don’t wait for an invitation, or care if he wants you to stay, you follow at his pace and can’t help but wonder who could be mounted on Silverwing. You want to think of anyone, someone you might know, but no one comes to mind, and those who do would not be stupid enough to bring their dragon to King’s Landing for a damn joyride. Because that’s what it seems like it is, a joyride.

Silverwing does not seem to be attacking, nor does she linger over one place. They don’t even land, they just fly, so whoever is on Silverwing must be pretty ballsy, and you need to know who it is, or perhaps protect them from Aemond and Vhagar’s wrath in some discreet way where it seems to Aemond that you’re attacking when you’re only scaring them away so they’re out of his reach.

But you can only do that if Aemond doesn’t forbid you from flying out after against them. You have already talked about this matter and come to a conclusion, but you still expect him to stop you, to tell you to stay put and wait for him to come back with a report.

Albeit he does not, he doesn’t even try to protest in some discreet way. When you finally reach a courtyard he doesn’t stop you from mounting a horse. He lets you ride out with him side by side, and between your curiosity and disbelief, you feel glad that he’s keeping to his word. It only makes your blood pump faster.

Yet nothing beats that rush when you hear your dragon’s threatening cry as she matches your enthusiasm and flies out to meet you without having to be told verbally, without having to go out to meet her like Aemond to Vhagar. As if in sync with each other's desires, Astraea flies past the city walls at the same time your horse sprints out of the city gates, and without having to come to a stop, and without having her land on some empty patch of land, you throw your arm out and stretch your fingers out.

Astraea’s shadow then casts over Aemond and you as she reaches you in a split second, but she doesn’t slow down to wait for you, she keeps at her. speed, seeming like she’s going to fly past you, but then a rope brushes over the tip of your fingers, so you grab onto it and wrap it around your wrist to be pulled off the horse as she continues flying forward; making you look like a sailor swinging across the deck of their ship, or out to danger.

Now, you usually don’t tend to mount Astraea using the rope, you tend to climb her, but in emergencies such as now, you use the rope, and strain all your upper body muscles to scale up the rope as she’s flying at a great speed over green lands.

Once you throw yourself over your leather saddle, Astraea peers back to make sure you’re secured on her back before she lets out an excited screech that matches the excitement you feel pumping to your heart, and then flaps her purple wings to pick up her speed and go faster than she already was without worrying over Vhagar or Aemond. You leave them behind because you know they’ll eventually catch up and pursue the stranger on Silverwing, the dragon that once belonged to Queen Alysanne, and who is mother to your own dragon.

Besides, leaving Aemond and Vhagar behind gives you time to know who rides Silverwing without having to be hostile. However, since Silverwing does have the lead, there's a pretty big gap between Astraea and her as she seems to be heading back to Dragonstone. Not like her having the advantage really matters, Astraea can be fast, especially when she’s excited or agitated, like now she’s as curious and rushed with as much thrilling excitement as you are.

So much so that she flaps her large wings and then dips down with her wings tucked to gain speed, managing after a few flaps to get close enough that you’ll be able to see who Silverwings rider is. You just need them to look down, but it doesn’t seem like they’re aware of you, or Astraea. Which indicates that they must be brand new to dragon riding, or stupidly careless.

Either or you need to know who they are exactly, but your voice won’t be carried out through the rushing wind, Astraea’s can though, so she speaks for you with a rather unthreatening chitter. She’s just loud and harsh enough that her noise will travel fast through the air and hit the ears of Silverwing, and her rider.

And as expected without having to call out a second time, Silverwing tilts her slim silver body to the side, letting you see the back of the rider before they look back and reveal who they are; some middle-aged man, with a plump face that matches his rather plump body, dark greying hair that flies over his shoulders, and a terrified look painted on his pale face.

He also seems to be dressed rather poorly, so does this mean he’s some bastard commoner? Did your mother really become so daring as to trust the Smallfolk to ride dragons for her? Because there’s no way Silverwing went out in search of this man, she hardly flew too far from Dragonstone, she isn’t as adventurous as Seasmoke, and with no rider, there wasn’t a reason to fly out to King's Landing or any city, so that can only mean that this was your mothers doing, but why didn’t she tell you?

Did she know you would be against it? Sure you have a soft spot for the Smallfolk, but to trust them with dragons? You can’t really trust strangers with polluted dragon blood. They can turn on you before you can know it. You can’t trust them, they’re not family.

But she seemed to trust them…so you have to…make sure Vhagar doesn’t touch them.

If only the man knew that you’re no threat, he looks like he’s about to shit himself with how scared he looks over your sudden appearance. That will not bode well for Silverwing. She’ll sense his fear and take you and Astraea as a threat, but there’s no way to make the man understand you won’t hurt them, you’ll just have to make Astraea slow down to put some distance between her and Silverwing.

“<Slow Astraea,>,” you tell your dragon in High Valyrian as you lean forward to caress her neck. “<We're on the same side.>”

Astraea chitters softly and tries to do as you say, making the man’s eyebrows pinch together and then ease as his fear turns to confusion. Yet Silverwing does not seem to go through the same emotions, because from one second to another she whips her tail down and smacks Astraea across the face.

“<Astraea!>” You call out in horror and watch her squirm her head out of pain before her brown eyes snap up and she lets out a pissed roar. “<Calm down!>” You try to ease her quick risen anger.

However, a deep guttural roar rips through the cloud bank behind you in response to Astraea’s rageful roar, and it seems that Vhagar gives fuel to Astraea’s anger because she then does exactly as you wanted her to do before, she slows down and hides from Silverwing in the cloud bank, causing the man to think you and your dragon stopped the chase because you’re out of sight.

Alas, that’s what Astraea wanted Silverwing and the rider to think. She wants them to lower their guard and waits for them to descend from greater heights to be just low enough that they’re close to the body of water you fly over.

You know she’s up to something, you can hear her groaning, and see her gaze pierced ahead and then fall, but rather than stopping her, you let her give in to her anger so you can scare away the rider and Silverwing because as you pay attention, you hear Vhagar. You see her in the distance and you know Aemond won’t hesitate to attack. Thus you let Astraea act out.

You actually let a smirk play on your lips, you relish in the adrenaline rushing through your veins as you think of what Astraea has planned. Which will give this new rider the wrong idea, but that’s what you need at the moment, you can’t blow your cover, and…a part of you doesn’t care that he gets the wrong idea about you. You…salivate over the thought of having him be scared of you.

It’s why with that mischievous longing in your heart, you welcome Astraea’s charge towards the water as you remain undetected. When you approach the water's surface you duck your head and draw in a deep breath to hold it in as your dragon dives in the cold water. And considering she’s more than fond of these antics when you’re riding her, you don’t show fear or panic, you actually tear your eyes open and find awe as you see all the wonders that live in the water.

They’re simple wonders like fish, simple deep and blue waters, and common undersea plants, but as if it’s the first time taking it all in you’re completely captivated by it all, but not forgetful of your current dire situation. You prepare for Astraea to resurface by closing your eyes and ducking your head again. Once your drenched body is smacked by the cold rushing breeze, you wipe the water off your eyes before you open them and then sit up, coming to see at that moment, as your eyes connect the shadow over you to its owner, that Astraea is now directly below Silverwing, and the silver dragon is none the wiser.

Silverwing did not hear Astraea dive in the water, nor does she catch her and you flying out and torpedoing toward her. Her rider is in the same affair, only Aemond and Vhagar see what you’re doing from a distance, and you know for a fact that neither will give you away. A proud and malicious smirk actually spreads on Aemond’s face, easing the frustration that has him all stiff. And that pride only heightens and mixes with awe as he catches how Astraea opens her mouth to get ready for the attack as she gets near the silver dragon.

Albeit just before she can chomp down on Silverwing, the silver dragon finally catches Astraea and is able to swerve the attack, making Astraea bite air.

“Damn,” you hiss under your breath and tug the handles away to steer Astraea away, but Silverwing is rightfully pissed. She flies head first toward Astraea before she tilts her body back to hook her claws on the Astraea.

However, before your dragon is gashed, she flips her body swiftly to be on her back and have you be upside down for a second before she flips to her other side and puts some distance between her and Silverwing.

“<Calm down now Astraea. That should be enough,” you tell your dragon as you pat her neck. “You did good girl. Leave her be now.>”

Astraea roars out at Silverwing, and the silver dragon responds with a louder and higher-pitched roar, but neither dragon goes for another attack. Astraea listens to you and lets Silverwing gain the advantage. The rider steals paranoid glances at you, but you don’t attempt to share any reassuring looks so he knows he’ll be fine, you feed his fear by passing him a malicious look that is the last thing he sees before he finally gains a good distance from you and your raging dragon.

After that, since you’re done with your charged pursuit you just follow him the rest of the way to Dragonstone since Aemond and Vhagar are still on Silverwing’s trail. You get so close to home in fact, that Astraea has to swerve to one side to avoid flying over land, in doing so letting you see the welcoming and relieving sight of your mother.

Your mother is there on the ground, and not alone either, she’s guarded by Syrax, and the great Bronze Fury, Vermithor, he’s there too, which is unbelievable really, but you can only give your attention to your mother who is struck with surprise as she sees you passing by. While you come to realize at the same time she does that you’re just out of reach, but still far from one another and not able to touch. The only thing you can do is pass her a prideful look for her achievement because regardless of your distrust and disapproval of this new plan, you’re still proud that she got to achieve such a feat in not only gaining a rider for Silverwing, but Vermithor too it seems! Proving how capable she is not only as a ruler but a warrior too.

You’re proud of that and you make sure she sees it with your smile not only on your lips but dancing in your eyes too.

Yet your pride and bliss are fleeting, taking your adrenaline with it when you fly over the shore and see Seasmoke with a rider. Which shouldn’t be surprising as it is, your father is gone and Seasmoke is free to bond with anyone. It was going to happen eventually, but…he was your father's dragon, he was a part of your father once and your heart always remembers your father every time you look at Seasmoke. Your heart aches every time you see the silver-grey dragon because you think of your beloved father.

Now when you look at Seasmoke you’ll see a new rider and the cruel reminder that your father won’t ever come back. He’s gone forever, and Seasmoke will now be someone else’s. He’ll be a part of someone new, someone…

Wait…

You blink and as the cloud of grief passes you come to recognize the man on Seasmoke; it’s Addam! Addam of Hull?!

But…but how?!

Who…

Oh…

Oh!

It’s not beyond the realm of possibilities, the realization that slams into you. There are other possibilities of course, but why else would your grandfather pester you and bother himself to introduce you to Addam’s brother Alyn?

You thought it was weird at that moment. Why would you care who that man is, and why would your grandfather put so much trust in a man when it came to sending him to King's Landing to check on you last year?

It’s because…Addam and Alyn, are his offspring. Potentially, but very likely. It explains why Addam is on Seasmoke!

Damn, now how can you assure yourself that it’s actually fact and not a wild assumption? Ask your grandfather? Yeah right, like he would ever confess to it. And it’s doubtful anyone else knows if it’s true.

Did your grandmother know?

Who knows.

Regardless, you want to know now, and you need to tell Aemond about Seasmoke too when you get home. It doesn’t seem like he noticed Addam and Seasmoke from where he was and because he turned away before he could get a closer look.

However, you don’t follow him home, Aemond leads you and Astraea to an elevated green mountain near the town Sharp Point rather than returning home right away, which…can’t be good. If he wanted time alone he would find it at home, not near this town.

Yet here he is and he’s pissed. You can see his face contorted with anger, his jaw clenched, and his gaze distant the moment you dismount your dragons.

“You saw it?” Is the first thing he says as you make your way to each other. “The dragons and their common born riders.”

You try to figure out his thought process, but there’s also so much in your mind, so your curiosity is second place to everything else.

“I saw it, and I saw Seasmoke too,” you share, making him grimace and turn his head away to simmer in his growing anger.

“But,” you add and step closer to him. “That’s not the most important fact. I know his rider.”

Aemond’s gaze immediately returns to you and his gaze narrows while his eye digs itself deep inside you to try and figure out what you mean by that.

“He has a brother that my grandfather introduced me to when we went to Driftmark,” you continue to heighten his jealousy and curiosity. “I thought it was weird that he would bother himself to introduce us, and then he revealed that he sent that brother to our engagement tourney, and now I think he did all this because…they might be…his bastards?” You say more like a question as if Aemond would know the truth.

“It explains why Addam can ride Seasmoke,” you explain what is clear, but then begin to drift back to confusion and cluelessness. “But I do not know, I can’t be sure. And it’s not like I can just ask my grandfather.”

Aemond swallows thickly and turns away to get lost in thought. You let your mind wander too, but as you do you also remember where you are, and what you think Aemond might do to this town in response to his anger for your mother’s achievements.

“Do you realize what this means? This dragonrider?” Aemond makes his silence short and turns to face you, making you slowly turn to face his gaze now not tense with jealousy, but softened with pity.

“If he is Lord Corlys’ bastard then he and the brother might be legitimized, and one of them may be turned heir of Driftmark and Lord of the Tides,” he shares what you did not even realize, you were so stuck on the fact that he might be your grandfather's bastard that you did not see the bigger picture. And now that you’re seeing it in its totality, that worry you had for this town is completely diminished.

“But,” you argue effortlessly as if weakened by the cruel but real assumption. “He said he would make Aerion his heir.”

Aemond sighs deeply and closes the gap between you to grab your arms and hold your gaze with your breaths brushing over each other's faces, and the warmth that radiates off him blanketing your still damped body.

“But now his bastards are fighting wars and bonding with dragons, they’re older, don’t you think he’ll favor him over our son?” He presses and only makes a sadness puncture your heart, and the need to know the truth that much more significant. After all, why wouldn’t you expect something else to be taken from you?

They took your role as heir, and now they might take your son's role as heir of Driftmark.

“Do you…” you trail off and drop your head to try and find an answer, to try and contradict that new fear Aemond planted in your mind. “Do you think he would?” You ask with a great sadness dulling your eyes while also making them gleam so brightly with the tears that cloud them.

“Why wouldn’t he? They already took your role as heir,” he says in a softer tone now as he reaches over to grab your face, forbidding you from feeling alone as your heart is once again troubled with sorrow, disbelief, and…growing anger.

Anger you can’t exactly feed without knowing if it’s true though. You need to know if Addam and Alyn are really his bastards before you can let this anger take root.

You need to know.

“I need to talk to someone,” you tell Aemond with determination. “I need to know if it’s true or not, and I know my grandfather would never say, so I need to go ask someone who will know.”

Aemond blinks and his eyebrows knit together. At first, he assumes you’ll ask one of the Hull boys, but you then tell him otherwise.

“I need to go ask the Red Priestess, Kinvara, she’ll know.”

Aemond parts his lips to rebuttal but you cup his hands and assure his worry. “I’ll be okay. I trust her. She’ll tell me the truth.”

.

.

.

.

.

A/N- something wicked this way comes ;(;

Tagged- @namelesslosers @stargaryenx @chainsawsangel @lauftivy @winxschester @cloudroomblog @llarue @padsdarlg @sofietargaryen @gracielikegrapes @dreaming-of-the-reality @itzelpeyton @patdsinner33 @mrsdominickstark @elaena-aerrin @todoroki-slut @snh96 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @nifujiswhore @sweethoneyblossom1 @kaetastic @lightdragonrayne @squidscottjeans @oh-you-mean-me @wallacewillow0773638 @icefrye19 @thescottpack @fiction-fanfic-reader @crazymusicgirl104 @r-3dlips @strangersunghoon @just-pure-trash @ethereal-athalia @missyviolet123 @callsignwidow @xunquish-blog @tabathastan

[scarletooyoroi]

Alright! S'been a hot minute the AQ and it's been properly digested so to speak. Under the cut I want to go over a different spin of content in the overview, mainly what I feel like were worldbuilding plot points that met odd ends.

Naturally will have some touch of spoilers for those not caught up.

The first thing I want to dive on is the issues that we were teased about Fontaine having.

First example being.

This was one starting example, but there was a few more NPCs and Liben's accounts that told of Fontaine's infrastructure. Now we could angle this as these researchers thinking extremely long term, yet, the realm of Fontaine itself never gives any visual or quest based storytelling of this account. If anything, there seems to be a craze trend with both robotics and the issues regarding the primordial sea.

To me that always just scratched the thought of this being a storybeat that ultimately needs attention. That said, we've virtually got none of that in response. The initial energy issues weren't even an issue as the newly established power source of Indemnitium (which we've never seen even be USED for the town, only Pneuma/Ousia has been utilized) didn't have no concerns what so ever. On top of that, we've learned from Focalors that a mere, minuscule fraction alone was enough to power Fontaine.

So okay, cool, with the granted direction and it's eventual demise, even though it's come at the VERY end of the AQ, that could lead to some future Fontaine stories for this route, right?

Well, no, for again the potential energy issue that needs to be regulated is then magically hoisted up by Nevuilette's hand. His Hydro authority granted him immediate generation, upkeep and control of Pneuma/Ousia energies. Which I mean.. is fine. That said, what to make of all the prior region teasing? Why are the humans there even bothering when technically, there should be no signs of downfall to warrant this concern? As it looks we've seen no measure of heavy pollution at all there either.

In return it gave me the impression that Fontaine's environment might've had a vastly different outlook before. Moreso a deeper look into aspects of pollution, purity and having to make good on caring for the land.

Sliding over to the next!

Another aspect of Fontaine it felt like we were going to get depth in was this, how there was this supposed shadow war between new and old generation Oceanids. Egerias idea of love and unity, Focalor's..??? We never really learned what she did to warrant this distaste, since her plan was moreso focused on just getting the Heavenly Principle's plan situated. Did the Oceanids even know about her existence? Was the distaste aimed at Furina?

There's also the new generation Oceanids in question. Was it the Hydro Phantasms that warranted this issue, or was it the Oceanids that followed the desires in becoming human? The latter feels difficult in being the case as we've seen no rhyme, reason or sign of Oceanid humanity even bothering with them, it's all in their own lives.

While the Hydro Phantasms can still be up for contention, we've rarely met any of them focused on this task. They're either wild spirits or in cases of the Veluriyam mirage, phantasms that wanted to keep the wishes of travelers there alive.

Being a longer time player, this is where many of the storytelling issues didn't end up-- bad (at least too bad to me), rather, it's a really weird note of them just shuffling some past ideas under the rug and calling it a day. I honestly don't think we're going to find any ground on them, given the gradual changes of their story overtime.

These were the big two about Fontaine that I really needed to get out there. With themes such as 'Purity' being a key part of it's story, this felt really weird to just topple on the wayside like this. Instead, it looks like it switched Egeria's sin of human creation instead.

Have you noticed any particulars yourself? Stuff like this fascinates me so I'd love to hear it.

damn you really out here readin' a lot.

[commiecricket]

Candela Obscura S2 - Thoughts So Far

Spoiler-Free!

i had the pleasure of seeing the premiere in theatres and it was PHENOMENAL. im gonna get right into it.

first off! you don’t necessarily have to watch the first season. i think you’ll have a bit of a better grasp on things and it’s also just fucking fantastic so i highly recommend. but no, you don’t have to in order to enjoy this campaign.

everyone embodies their characters so well. you can absolutely feel the love and detail put into them. you can feel them getting into their roles as the episode goes on and by the end, you’re completely attached.

it definitely starts off a lot quicker than season 1. we get right into the good stuff with a cold open directly to action. it starts off strong and ends with a bang.

HELL of a first episode, i’ll tell you that.

the vibe is definitely different from matthew mercer’s campaign. spenser has a unique GM style that took a minute to get used to. threwe off a bit at first, but i think it fits the narrative so far.

i pulled together an auggie cosplay just for the hell of it. did some makeup inspired by s1e3 and got dolled up in my best paperboy attire.

unfortunately i was literally the only one dressed up (+ my sibling in just general dark academia clothing). i also had to walk around a very busy store beforehand. so that was a bit awkward but honestly, i was so excited i didn’t care.

all in all, it was incredible. if you enjoyed the first season or are into any kind of body horror or thrillers, give it a try.

and now.. for the details.

SPOILERS under the cut!

i cant wait to see more of their backstories. im super happy with the amount of backstory we got this episode. not too much or too little. just enough to be intriguing and get you invested, while still leaving some mystery.

starting the episode into immediate action was a bit off putting, ngl. i was startled by the pretty significant difference in how spenser is GMs in contrast to matt. i adore his play style but it took a second to get used to. as the episode progressed i could tell it was working really well for this campaign, which is pleasing.

im immediately drawn to sean and marion. i loved auggie and have a fixation on newsies so i obviously have a specific character type i enjoy LMAO. their personalities and interactions with everyone are fantastic.

the PTSD-flashback-type scenes were a great addition imo. it added a lot to their characters. plus that interaction when marion gets his scar? 100/10, gorgeous, tore me apart. i will be watching that scene again when it gets posted and that is a threat.

marion’s breakdown shattered my heart and the other party members had such interesting reactions. im hoping we have more moments like that sprinkled throughout.

of course i love everyone so far. auntie b’s complex history with each party member, nathaniel’s bits of family history, jean’s struggle beginning to shine through, sean’s internal battle with trauma / vague history, marion’s conflict with his own abilities… its all so good.

needless to say i think we’re going to be fed well this season.

my sibling was crying during a few parts but i only really teared up when jean said goodbye to her dad. i knew it was coming but damn it still tugged at my heartstrings.

that entire last scene was just so. GOOD. the entire theatre was losing their fucking minds. you could hear whispering, gasping, nervous giggling. jean’s gilded 6 was wild.

my favorite part of the night was probably when jean was investigating the body and pulled an eye from his heart. as spenser revealed what she found, a loud cough/hacking sound came from the back of the theatre.

you could tell it was probably just a coincidence but after a few seconds of silence people started to laugh. it was just a silly moment that made me really appreciate the atmosphere. as someone who rarely watches films in theatre (or at all tbh), it was a pleasant experience.

anyway i fucking LOVE co and have not stopped thinking about it since the last season ended. so i am very obviously hyped. cant wait to see whats next!

spenser sparke, taliesin jaffe, chris lockey, shaun ellis, matthew mercer, the party members of both seasons, and everyone else who has had a hand in this series — thank you. youve created something viscerally beautiful.

[lynsburner]

Hi Lyn! I was wondering… in your ‘Verse, would you say Andrew wrote any of his songs for/about Lovely (reader)? If so, what are they, and what was her reaction to them?

And would you be willing to write any more Hozier fics in the future? There’s a terrible lack of them everywhere and yours are soooo good!!!

Hello. This answer is about to be super long. My bus home from work got stuck in a ridiculous amount of traffic. Plus, you got me ruminating on this all day at work (Outside the millions of phone calls I was supposed to make. People responding to an email you sent them? Revolutionary concept if you asked me!) and think I’ve decided firmly on, and hear me out on this, “No Plan.” 

That song to me is about not worrying where things are going to go (The sun’s going to go out! Who gives a shit!) and to not sweat the small stuff. And I guess in this context, it’s about being a little worried about something new, like a relationship that has a lot of shit going against it. It’s about enjoying the little things that you do have. The “I think you’re worth at least trying,” or describing this love as “shiny and new, like a toy to be played with, nervously discovering all the nooks and crannies as time goes on.” 

(Yes, I am quoting myself. I am a very self-centric person. I am sorry)

Also now I’m head cannoning that he texted her: Did you know the sun’s going out? After watching that talk and that’s when she hit him with the I like you. A lot. Too much, actually. What better time to confess your feelings for a dear friend than also getting him out of a doom spiral? 

Anyway, one day she just gets texted an audio file with just “🖤” (the black heart emoji, which I’m sure is just one big Carly Rae Jepsen reference) out of the blue. It’s a messy, unpolished demo. 

And when she doesn’t respond immediately since she’s taking it all in, he texts again: 

Just wanted to know your thoughts on this… 

Andrew… 

Yes…? 

What is this? 

A song. Not sure if you’ve heard of them before. The proper definition is: “a short poem or other set of words set to music or meant to be sung.” 

I hate you. 

I don’t care what you think about me. I only care what you think about the song. 

I love it.  You? Debatable… 

She calls him after that. They have a “Don’t bother me while I’m working,” on that list of rules, (“I wouldn’t ask you to help me with an Excel formula, would I?”) so it’s sort of rare she hears anything before it’s finished on purpose (not every wall can be reinforced with soundproofing material). It’s a special moment. 

Ok. This was a tangent and then some. Thank you for letting me indulge my fantasies lol 

Also, half of me wanted to answer this with “Sunlight” but only because that’s my favorite. But it also can be read as putting too much into something, especially with the entire 3rd verse comparing the love being had to the Icarus story, it almost sounds like it’s bound to end in tragedy (a lot of his songs do tbh I could write about that for days). 

But, I do love the lyric “know that I would gladly be the Icarus to your certainty” so much. Need me someone like that LMFAO. 

Anyway, as for new stuff? I’m currently 3 chapters deep (of 10! and halfway through the last chapter, ironically) with an idea I’ve had for a while now that I’m really excited about. It’s pretty dialogue heavy and is set around a weekly get-together. I just don’t want to post any chapters until I’m finished because then it would never get done. 

I did almost write a threequel (is that the right word?) to the first two stories, but the dialogue was too similar and they fit better in the chaptered idea. That one was about them revisiting a place they took a trip together as friends and why nothing happened between them that first time around (spoiler: Andrew was too high and too drunk to properly process feelings and his idea for them getting together comes off as more of a joke. The next morning he's got no memory of their argument, so back to square one they were!). They were probably going to get engaged at some point. Good for those crazy kids! I wish them the best!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this way too long of a response, Anon! Have a great night!

[zimbardos]

I finished Infinite Jest.

(This post contains spoilers)

I'm proud of myself for doing it. And only in two months especially since English is far from being my native language. I used the Wiki to look up difficult words while reading.

I was very pleased with the ending. It was perfectly ambiguous enough to end there. I was sure Gately died in the hospital and got a flashback to his rock bottom, it seemed so open-ended in a good way.

And then I found out I was wrong about many things. I missed a lot of the plot (since it's not chronological or clear). It's definitely not spoon fed to you and you have to really research the timeline. I was extremely impressed at how the different plots connected to each other perfectly. It's so brilliant now that I get the inter-connectedness and the incredible Lost-style foreshadowing. I don't know how he did it. Nothing in the book is meaningless, everything serves a purpose and tells a bigger story. It's incredible.

I really feel like it was worth the effort. It was difficult but I feel so complete now in a way.

Infinite Jest really helped me on a personal level too, to come to terms with the way I see academic achievement. I watched the film The End of the Tour about two weeks before I started the book. I really loved the movie and I stayed up watching his interviews, discovered I like the way he looks at the world (keep in mind DFW obviously was a really shitty human being irl though) and I decided to order the book, which I rarely do (I don't really buy books before reading them because I often end up disappointed with the book and feel like I've wasted money on it). IJ came to me at a time in my life when I was very confused about achievement. I'm studying to become a clinical psychologist, in my country it's an extremely competitive, long and difficult journey where you're constantly evaluated and compare yourself to others. I thought a lot about how do I not care enough that if I fail on this journey my self esteem won't shatter, while simultaneously caring enough to work hard to achieve it.

During my first year, I was really anxious about getting on the Dean's List. No particular reason other the selfish need for affirmation that I was good (the fact that I NEED to be good to get to my dream job obviously contributed though so it's not all narcissism) an entire year of worrying about it intensely. A few days before I watched the movie, I got an email that I was on the Dean's List. Seeing my name there made me happy, but that high only lasted about 10 minutes. I was confused, sad and disappointed as to why the suffering was so long and the pay-off so short. I tried to make sense of it. Why wasn't I really happy? I naively thought I'd be happy when I get the email. My overall wellbeing during that year was great, but it had the caveat at the back of my mind of "This is good, but I'll be TRULY happy when I'm on the Dean's List". It didn't fulfill all my dreams. Is this what is going to happen to me when I become a psychologist? I saw videos of doctors who talked about finally getting to their M.D.s and realizing the day to day life as a doctor was just as gray and boring and grueling (obviously that doesn't mean that pursuing these careers isn't worthwhile, it's just not going to magically solve all your problems and you shouldn't look at it that way). It was scary in an existential way. A small crisis.

In the book, the Enfield Tennis Academy is a highly competitive place and they have a great philosophy that they try to teach the young players in order for them to be resilient to the difficult psychic struggles of being an athlete of this level. There's an emphasis on caring and not caring at the same time, not thinking about the potential future fame, only existing in the moment. I felt very validated and seen by Hal's struggle especially. DFW was deeply concerned with that kind of stuff. You hear from his interviews he was fascinated by the difficulty of dedicating your life to something and then failing (see also: "How Tracy Austin Broke My Heart").

The main thing I got from the book is to try to get to that point where you don't put all your eggs in the one basket of achievement, it alone won't bring you much happiness.

The achievement part is not the only reason to read the book. He also deals with entertainment in general (which is a whole 'nother conversation... especially since things in this regard are so much worse nowadays compared to the 90's when IJ was written. I would have loved his thoughts on how the internet changed the world. We live now more than ever in a world where you have the right to be entertained all the time, constantly, your mind never getting a moment of quiet for itself if you don't want it) and with drug addiction.

Anyway, it's a phenomenal book. I highly recommend it. I feel stronger now in my pursuit of personal academic milestones. I feel changed as a person, the way only truly great books can change you.

[yandere-sins]

Yandere diavolo taking care of their s/o after getting them pregnant kekkekkske, I've seen 2 types of people write this, 1.how they got their s/o pregnant 2.after the baby was born ;-; , bruh, what the heck happened in between? What if the s/o tried running away while pregnant, what did diavolo do?? I need answers

Let me indulge you then! ^^

»»———————— ♡ ————————««  

♡ The pregnancy is a bit of a double-edged sword. Diavolo is ecstatic! He loves the idea of becoming a dad and all the family stuff you three get to do once the little one is born. He’s already planning trips and public appearances, and tells you about the fantastic birthdays you’ll celebrate with the kid and how he’s going to teach his child swimming and magic and all the royal shebang (spoiler: he won’t). Everything is fantastic and awesome in his world now that he’s expecting a royal heir, announcements are being made, and he celebrates every inch of belly you’re gaining with his child growing inside you. Every day, new presents arrive at your suit, both from other royals and influential figures, as well as Diavolo. And if he thinks it isn’t enough, he’ll order a few dozens more once he comes back after work so you two can spend some more time together and unwrap. The amount of pacifiers you own in the first week of your pregnancy is nightmarish. He’s much more attentive and careful, treating you like a fragile doll, whether you hate it or love it. And damn, when a prince kneels before you to massage your feet, how can you ever complain about all the ways he wronged you in the past?

♡ But... well. That is the extent of it. The palace has enough bathrooms, so he doesn’t need to stick around for your morning sickness. He has to work, surely you understand that he leaves you feeling like shit, right? His offer to massage your feet is not only a painful experience as it is a singularity. You can hire the best masseurs in Devildom, but once was enough for Diavolo, and he’ll childishly overhear and ignore it if you ever complain and ask for one in the future. In the evening, he comes over, lounging, forcing you to relax with him and let him feel your belly. He’s totally in awe when he gets to experience the first kicks, and you tell him the child can hear him now. Only to kiss you goodnight right after and leave you all alone at night to deal with your various feelings about the situation. It’s strange because he’s involved, but then... isn’t. He’s there for the good moments but never the rough patches, always leaving you in the care of servants instead of dealing with whatever is bothering you. He swears up and down he loves you, but somehow, now that you could actually need a partner, he’s giving you the cold shoulder.

♡ Even though you aren’t allowed to attend them, Diavolo throws lavish parties in your and his child’s honor, drinking, smoking, and celebrating. All the things devils do to honor and bless the child of the future king, while you have to deal with the music echoing through the desolated halls, guards complaining about having to work while everyone gets to play and have fun. You are alone and left to your own devices, hormonal, and without being granted any fun like parties or even taking longer walks ever since you became pregnant to prevent anything from happening. If things go downhill, a very tipsy Diavolo comes to visit you for some kisses and touches. Maybe more. That’s when things become weird, however, as he starts getting very emotional. He rarely asks for your opinion on matters. Still, he keeps questioning if you like being pregnant and if you’re happy to have his baby. How happy are you? Do you love the child more than him? Do you want to get rid of it? Diavolo hints (not so subtle) at being jealous that you spend so much time with your child compared to him. He reveals how unhappy it makes him that you two don’t get to do the things anymore you did before and how he misses those times. It’s bizarre since he’s usually so happy about his child and dismissive of you at the same time that his change of heart seems very misplaced. That rings some very new alarm bells in your head, doesn’t it?

♡ Your escape chances were slim already before getting pregnant. You don’t think he didn’t up the guards just in case you decide now was the perfect time after it went so well between you two for a while? Admittedly, that idea to keep you under stricter watch was whispered to him by many like-minded individuals with a little bit more experience. Even if he didn’t like having you guarded by eyes that don’t deserve to watch you all day long, he still makes sure to put more guards in front of your windows and doors. Diavolo can be a bit lenient with you at times, always having a soft spot and wanting to respect you as long as it suits him. But you can be sure as hell you’ll lose that privilege of his trust once you escape from him. He can’t even punish you, but his anger drives him to turn over every stone, uproot every tree, and rebuild entire houses in all of Devildom to find you. An added difficulty for you is that your freedom is short-lived. There are more people who are interested in your child (more than you, and some even more than the reward promised for returning you). It is Diavolo’s child, after all. That little bundle of nightmares joy has the royal magic, the access to everything the royal family hides, and if everything breaks, will make an excellent bargain. Life’s becoming dangerous. Just like Diavolo always feared, there are so many people after you that he can’t even count who to get rid of first. And with every second you’re gone, his anxiety spikes, and his thoughts muddle until he’s one raging demon you wished you had never crossed paths with. At least he swears to burn anyone to crisps, eradicate their souls and existences from the universe if they touch you. Even if you end up losing the baby to someone, Diavolo’s priority is getting you back, safe and healthy, to be locked into your room for all eternity with no moment of privacy even when he’s with you. Guarded 24/7. And maybe, once he unleashed all the anger he’s been harboring, he’ll think of getting the child back. The world will burn for anyone who meddled with his happy little family. That’s something you can be sure of.

[ashthemadwriter-archived]

How their female version would be like Ft. Karasuno

Fandom: Haikyuu

Pairings: Karasuno boys X Gn!reader

Genre: Crack,Fluff,kinda Smut

Format: Headcanons

Warnings: Nsfw content,mentions of BDSM,slight spoiler from the manga on Daichi's part

Word Count: 2.1 K

A/n: Used she/her pronouns for the characters.not proofread.doing this just with the Karasuno boys,so if you want me to do other teams as well,hit me :D

I would love to do it for Inarizaki and/or Nekoma as well…

image source here Part two with Fukurodani,Seijoh,Nekoma

↬Tobio Kageyama

-holy fucking shit,dude.shes hot as fuck and she doesn't even tries to

-I think she'll be the kind of girl who's quiet and doesn't really interact with anybody (except for you ofc)

-The heart breaker.thousands of boys have a thing for her,but none of them have the gutts to tell her because of the amount of guys she'd rejected before

-she has like, the biggest boobs ever.the sight of them bouncing up and down as he does a service ace is the hottest view you've ever seen in your whole fucking life,which is why it leads to a quicky into the locker room,and him trying to remain quiet as you suck on her nipples.

-shes not really into PDA (girl is shy T^T) , but loves it when she has all your attention.feeling your eyes on her in the court just makes her even more motivated to give it her best and win the match so she'll be able to hear your praises and feel your tight hugs.

-dunno why but she gives me a long haired girl kinda vibe.just imagine her and her straight,shiny black hair that is shaped into a long ponytail whenever she goes to play volleyball <3

-she tries to remain quiet in bed,but sometimes fails T^T you fingering her and eating her out at the same time literally drives her crazy.cannot control her loud moans,and you don't want her to either :D

-shes shy omg omg so shy when it comes to sex or confessing her feeling toward you T^T she'll blush everytime youre making her feel good and also,everytime she tells you how much you mean to her.ITS ADORABLE

-doesn't how a particular style and doesn't really care about her appearance. the only things you've seen her wearing is her jersey,her school uniform and the black & dark blue jacket she wears whenever she goes for jogging.

-her body…her fucking,goddamn,hot,toned body

-just Hallelujah

-just imagine her white,flawless body naked with her hair down,her tits bouncing up and down as your fucking eath other

-you get a heart attack everytime she wears a dress,because its rare she looks so fucking stunning

-god just help me-

↬Shoyo Hinata

-shes more like the adorable type (I mean,he already is,and hes into her sister's cute girly stuff so yeah)

-shes shy at first but when she gets used to you…omg

-clingiest baby ever

-loves it when you tie her hair into pigtails T^T appreciates any form of affection,honestly

-owns multiple types of cute hairclips and wears at least two of them to school

-her hair is not long,but not short either.medium sized :D but her height is definitely short lmao,like around 156 cm…

-but hey! its fine! I mean short girls are cute! and theres really no pressure on her,though its harder to reach the net :D

-now im giggling lol

-she wears long cute leggings which are kinda hot,but mostly cute

-big fan of phisycal touch.loves cuddles,high fives,kisses (she'll blush,but it doesn't mean that shes not into them)

-I think that she would be a switch in bed.like,you do something for her? shes gonna return the favor and even more wildly so <3 -her kisses are filled with emotions.her feelings immediately grow stronger for you as time passes by and will definitely get attached to you :>

-if you break her heart im gonna kick your ass

↬Kei Tsukishima

-HOLY FUCK

-im outta breath

-I mean goddd! hes already such a mean daddy/dom, and you think that will change if he turns into a woman? nopppppe!

-shes even meaner than usual !

-this mf is so damn fucking hot,i mean it!

-shes tall ok? so she has long,slim,hairless legs (thanks to laser lol)

-her thighs…

-Ash.exe has stopped working

-always wears long black/red leggings which makes her legs even more hotter

-people are always wondering about how she would taste :D and Yamaguchi notices this too

-"wow Tsuki! your legs are so hot!" "shut up,Yamaguchi"

-she has short,messy hair :> SHORT,BLONDE,MESSY HAIR

-longest fucking eyelashes ive ever seen,which makes her even more breath taking

-her hair reaches a bit under her shoulders

-just imagine her wearing bdsm clothes (wtf are they called? those black leather clothings? dunno lmfao) she'll block your eyesight bye covering them with a red ribbon, and will give you the best sex you've ever had

-shes so fucking mean! wont let you cum unless youre practically begging her to make you cum,and she has no mercy!

-youre obsessed with her.her salty attitude,her long fingers that makes you scream in bed,her hot fucking thighs which youre dying to lick one day…

-and she wonts disappoint you :D

-"you've been such a good girl/boy ,wanna make mommy feel good?"

-and that's how you end up lying on the bed,your tongue on her clit while she rides your face, and she wont take her leggings/long boots off :D

-just come fuck me Tsukishima lmao im desperate

↬Tadashi Yamaguchi

-awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

-no seriously, awwwwwwwwwwww

-shes so nice and cuuuuuuuuute!

-so cute! so cute I just wanna eat her up!

-which is weird how shes friends with a meannie like Tsuki, but we all know that Tsukishima is good deep down too :)

-blushing most of the time,especially when boys try to talk to her or ask her out

-"ah… blushing furiously* t-thank you but I already have y/n…"

-im gonna die I cant take it anymore theres butterflies flying out of me

-this princess is the definition of the word "Adorable"

-she has long hair :> not as long as Kageyamas, but long

-ok ok imagine this

-youre sitting on her bed and shes sitting on the ground.you braid her long hair for her and then gently pull her hair so she would look up to you,and you place a small kiss on her forehead telling her how beautiful she looks and then shower her with kisses while she blushes hard

-shes into skincare :> you spend your Friday nights trying the new masks and skincare products shes bought and she'll whine a bit when you eat all the cucumbers to tease her lol

-loud in bed lmao.moans your name and pushes your head to her pussy so youll give her all the pleasure he deserves

-god I wanna marry her

-please please please treat this her like a princess,she deserves it

↬Yuu Nishinoya

-well well well

-look what do we have here

-ok first of all,shes short lol

-so short

-really short

-barely reaches 153

-but does that effect her self steam? nooooope

-I mean were talking about Nishinoya Senpai :>

-hm…her hair is something between long and medium :>

-not to mention that now that shes a girl her hair is always down so…

-damn!

-see the lighter colored part of his hair on top? its longer now,and its down

-talkative as ever lmao

-even more so

-always encouraging her friends,no matter what is it about

-long,black eyelashes

-her eyes are stunning

-SHES NOT A VIRGIN

-IM TELLING YOU

-most experienced girl ever,honestly

-I mean shes short but shes also hot

-her wearing a black tight dress that makes her slim body even more noticeable and the light makeup she has on? people do not mistake her for a elementary school kid anymore

-remember what I told you about her eyes? add black eyeliner

-oh god

-she even playes hard to get sometimes lmao

-she will no sleep with anyone.this lady is a fan of long term relationships and prefers true love instead of messing around/one night stands

-so if you wanna get into her pants? gotta be loyal

-yeah yeah. no objections allowed

↬Ryuunosuke Tanaka

-<3

-<33

-shes got short hair

-as short as Kageyamas (the male version of course), but messy

-and blonde

-remember Kristen Stewart's hair style in the movie "Charleys Angles" ? That

-ok I dunno why but she looks like a lesbian lmao (not because of her hair bitches)

-shes a fucking fighter. shes into boxing and definitely a member of a fight club

-am I allowed to say that she still has a crush on Kyoko?…

-boys like to be friends with her.i mean shes a tough girl.tough girls are popular,right?

-shes tall.not too much,but tall.like… 170 maybe?

-super protective of her friends.shit,did some guy make you cry? you better not let her find out about it

-"who the fuck dared to upset you? im gonna kick that stupid ass of his! just give me his damn name and ill bring his dead body to ya"

-super reliable.ask her to do something and she'll do it in the perfect way

-is a fan of piercings,and has unbelievably huge breasts <3

-has black eyeliner and red lipstick on :D

-she knows how to make you feel good in bed

-just omg…

↬Koushi Sugawara

-finally! its my sugar mommy's turn now :D

-ok

-shes just like Tsukishima,only more mischievous

-like,she seems so nice,so innocent,so sweet

-until she has you on her bed

-you find your self in handcuffs,eyes coverd,ass in the air with her slapping you and youre like "dude what just happened"

-lmao

-but shes a nice girl,tbh

-shes just a bit naughty under her good girl mask lol

-shes so damn hot

-like literally the perfect appeariance

-her height is around 165,her hair reaches her hips and its unique color…

-very very popular among boys. theyre like "Damn! here comes the hot girl from class B! ive been dying to ask her out!" and youre like "back off mfuckers shes taken"

-shes super professional in bed.makes you go wild.

-always has lip gloss on.her shining lips are the most eyecatching thing ever, and that is the reason why you always end up in the locker room,half-naked, having one of your intense makeout sessions.

-likes to put mascara on <3

-ok idk why but I think she would be into bananas lmao.no perverted thought honestly

-definitely sits on your face.if you ever upset her? get ready to be punished lmao

↬Asahi Azumane

-again,awwwwwwww

-lmao I feel bad for him XD I mean hes such a softie when hes a man,let alone being a woman

-so soft.sooooo soft T^T

-you mean the world to her and she will not hesitate to show it to you

-I think she'll be a good cook,but sucks at making desserts

-like,she wants to make you some cookies for your date night,and the next thing you know is firefighters in front of your house pouring water into the kitchen lmao

-she apologizes so much! I mean,literally for everything.things are not going according to the plan? shes bending over and crying "im sooooorryyyyyy waaaaaaaaa" "w-what are you saying sorry about? freaking out* "

-long hair lmao.reaches under her waist.and her height is around 172 ig

-shy in bed.whatever you do,shes gonna BLUSH,and will definitely praise you afterwards

-"I love how you make me feel so good…blushes* "

-Daichi still messes with her sometimes lol

↬Daichi Sawamura

-ok im getting writers block,so lets wrap this up quickly

-this bitch

-lmao

-short messy hair,always shaped into a ponytail

-dude its hot

-shes a cop,but one of those sexy cops

-your trying to clean the bed and next thing you know shes behind you, putting handcuffs on you and whispering to your ear "sir/ma'am, youre under arrast" "oh yeah? for what?" "stealing my heart.you have the right to remain silence until we get to the court"

-and by court,she means the bed :D

-likes to eat you as a dessert,or may I say,with the dessert.she'll put some Nutella on your sex,licking it while giving you shivers

-so naughty,so responsible,so nice

-will never offend you,but gets serious when youre doing something that may be harmful to yourself.will immediately stop you and doesn't care if you get upset.she'll eventually convince you that its for your own good tho,so no worries.

-the kind of girlfriend who would definitely be labled as "your wife" in the future :>

damn! this is long for me lmfao reblogs,comments or any kind of interactions are super duper appreciated! :D

[nicka-nell]

Things you fight about a lot and how they comfort you

Pairing: Kuroo x reader, Ushijima x reader, Suna x reader

Warning: hurt/comfort, MDNI, manga spoiler

⋮  ➛ Navigation | Open Collab - Three seconds

About his overtime

In a fight, you can both get louder.

Nasty words don’t fall, but one or the other accusation is sometimes there.

If it becomes too much and you notice that the fight goes too far or you are about to say something that can not be taken back afterwards, you say “reset”.

As soon as this word falls, you stop arguing, no matter how bad the argument was, and try to calm down. With or without the others nearby.

“Tetsurou, I have the feeling we live two different lives. People only see me alone because you’ve only been working overtime, so what do we have the relationship for?” you yell at him angrily, punch your little fists against his chest. “You know that we are going through a hard phase right now at work, and that I have to do overtime just so that we can manage everything in time. Also, why would you care what others think about our relationship? We know we are together, that’s enough!” Now Kuroo gets louder, can no longer hear the subject. You’re arguing more and more about his overtime. He understands your frustration, but right now, he can’t change anything. Why can't you understand that? It's not like he's enjoying it.

“A phase, of course, Tetsurou... It’s always a phase. And I don’t care what the others think about us. But right now, I don’t even know if we have a relationship! Honestly it doesn't feel like it anymore!” Your eyes fill with tears, not only because you’re sad to see him so rarely but also because you’re angry. “Reset…” You hear his broken voice. He looks at you with heavy eyes, visibly shocked by your statement that hurt him. Kuroo knows he is currently too little at home. Therefore, he does everything to make you feel that he is thinking of you. In between work, he writes you messages, sends you flowers, funny selfies, and tries to spend the time you have together only with you. Without his mobile phone or stuff like that. But at the moment, his hands are simply tied.

“Reset…” you agree with him, realize that you have overreacted and that you have visibly hurt him. Both of you take one step at the other, take each other in your arms and know that this fight is over, at least for now.

Whether ending a fight with this kind of ‘reset button’ is really a proper way to resolve disputes, you doubt, but for you, it’s something that works. So why should you change it?

After such a fight, you both usually stay like that in each other’s arms for a few minutes. Just keep quiet before you lie down in bed, cuddle and watch a funny series. Like Friends or King of Queens. Something where you can just stop thinking about everything and just laugh.

Together you lie there. You on the side, Kuroo behind you. You’re still looking at the TV, laughing at the scene in front of you. But Kuroo only has eyes for you, for your smile. He's happy he has you. That you're his. And he's counting the days until he can finally finish work on time. When all the stress and tension of both of you falls and you can do more together again.

Kuroo gently strokes your side, sees you blushing and looking at him from the corner of your eye. "I love you, kitten." he says before rubbing his nose against your warm neck. "I love you too, Tetsu."

Misunderstandings in the communication

You two rarely fight. And if only because of miscommunication.

Similar to Kita, Ushijima is never loud in a dispute. You can yell at him, punch him, and he would still remain calm, rather look at you questioningly.

Ushijima notices very late in an argument that you are actually arguing before he asks why you are angry. Usually he does not understand the reason for it.

“Why did you invite her for a coffee, Wakatoshi?” You ask irritated, your tone is angry. So angry that Ushijima should recognize it, but he just looks at you as always with this big question mark on his face. “Well, you told me to invite her…” he replies. “No, Wakatoshi, that was ironic! That was not meant seriously! Why are you always like that? You really think I’d like you to meet someone else who was flirting with you?” you’re so angry, nobody can be that stupid. He does it on purpose. He wants to annoy you, you think. You pass him angrily, but he follows you like a lost puppy.

“Then why didn’t you just say that?”, “Because, ah, forget it!” you scream and want to leave, but Ushijima catches your hand and stops you from leaving. “Are you mad at me? If so, I don’t understand why. I’m not going to this meeting if you don’t want to. I just thought that’s what you wanted, that’s why I said yes.” Ushijima is helpless. Earlier that day, a reporter asked him if he could answer some questions. But since he was with you on the way to a restaurant, he had no time and also no desire for a spontaneous interview. The reporter had then asked him if he wants to answer one or the other questions tomorrow over a coffee, but he had no interest. Actually it was you who said 'oh yes of course, that sounds great to go on a date with the nice lady, Toshi,' so why are you mad? He just said yes because you laughed so pretty.

"It's just... Nevermind. I should have expressed myself more clearly," you whisper, and try to calm down. Your voice was so quiet, Ushijima couldn't hear you but right now you look sad. Still a bit helpless he takes you into a firm embrace, brushing over your hair.

Even if he is not good with words, is not the person who likes to cuddle, or who looks for closeness, you are glad that he is with you right now and that he can calm you down by his hug and his deep breathe tickling your skin. Maybe it’s also his heartbeat that calms you down, but no matter what it is, you feel your anger subside.

You should have known he’d misunderstand your irony. After all, it's always like that. That’s just not his thing. Sighing, you look up at him, just want to open your mouth to apologize, when he looks at you with his usual monotonous look. “I’m sorry if I made you mad. You know, I never wanted that.” He says before you even have a chance to say anything.

After his apology, you usually still look for support in his arms, enjoy the moment with him before you live the everyday life quite normal.

Because even if you were resentful, for Ushijima such an argument with an apology is over and therefore there’s no longer a reason to address it again. If you accept his apology, there is no reason for him to think or talk about the subject.

"I'd like to go jogging now, will you come with me?" He asks you, while putting on a thermal shirt, because it’s still too fresh in the evening. Shaking your head you look into the fridge. "I want to prepared dinner, will you be back in an hour?" you ask and turn around to wait for his answer. "Yes, I guess one hour is fine," he nods and takes you in his arms to give you a short but sweet kiss. "See you later, my love."

That he’s too lazy in the household

Suna is also not the loud part in an argument. He is rather a listener who has no desire for a discussion or an argument.

Nevertheless, he can also give snappy answers if he thinks it is necessary, but with you, this has never happened.

For Suna quarrels are always exhausting, and mostly so meaningless because he can’t change anything at that moment anyway.

“What’s so hard about doing the laundry? Or to empty the dishwasher and not to simply put the dirty coffee cup on the work surface!” you yell at him and point to the dishes he has placed on the dishwasher, intentionally did not put away the clean dishes in the machine." Nothing," he answers you shrugging, follows your hand pointing at the porcelain. He could really do more. He also knows that. “Then why don’t you?” you ask, arms crossed. “Don’t know… I will change that in the future. Promise.” he answers you, and sits back on the couch to look for news on his social media channel.

“You’re not gonna do that anyway!” you hiss, can only shake your head because Suna goes away in the middle of your argument. “Yes, but now I can’t do anything to show you that I’ll do it in the future, or?” he asks. This time you hear in his voice that he is annoyed. The apartment is clean, just like the laundry… Actually, he can’t do anything right now. But you know very well that his clean-up will be short-lived and you will talk about the subject again in two weeks. Rolling your eyes, you leave the room, have no desire to talk about it unnecessarily, because your argument won’t lead to anything.

The fight between the two of you almost always ends unspoken.

While you’re still angry and offended, Suna pretends everything is the same.

Sometimes you play his ‘game’, because the fight is no longer important to you. But you don’t always do that. If you don't go along with his game, Suna tries to bring you back to a normal mood with some tiny questions about random stuff a few times.

If you ignore him then he just leaves you alone for the day, because he knows that you need it then.

If you’re mad at him until the evening, he cuddles up to you at night, gives you a good-night kiss on the forehead and tells you that he loves you, although he knows you’re just pretending to sleep.

Silently, Suna opens the bedroom door before he silently crawls into bed, taking care not to be too loud. He knows you’re not really sleeping, but if you want to keep being grumpy, you should be mad at him. But that doesn’t apply to him. Carefully he lifts up your blanket, lays down under it and gives you a kiss on the back of the head. "Good night, sleep well and dream of something nice. Love you, princess." he whispers before he pushes his arm under your head and presses you from behind to his chest. The hand on your breast, the other around your waist.

"I love you too.." you answer him quietly, just can’t be angry at Suna. You sense the soft smile of your boyfriend before he presses you even closer to him and fall asleep.

[with-love-from-hell]

Hey sissy!

I wanted to ask that can you make a hc where the brothers finds that MC is pregnant after she went to human world?

Like her time in devildom ended and she was sented back there and after 1 year the brothers visit MC and sees that she has their baby!

Sorry because I said a lot and if the requests are closed then I am sorry again (I am not forcing you to do this, you can ignore this if you want!)

HELLO luv omg I am so sorry it took me so long to do this. I'm finally finishing up my backlog 😭😭

Mc now has a child: the brothers reacting to it being theirs

Written for a F!Mc

Cw: mentions of pregnancy, suggestive language, implications of sex w/ the brothers, pre-established relationships with the brothers, spoilers for lessons 16+

MINORS DNI.

Lucifer

Came to the human world on business with Diavolo and Barbatos.

Diavolo suggested paying Mc a visit since no one had seen you in nearly a year.

Lucifer was excited. He had only been able to talk to you on the phone, but opportunities have been more rare over the past couple months.

They approached the door to your home. Lucifer figured you'd be home- since the last time you spoke you had mentioned you were taking a few weeks off of work.

You opened the door, looking like you hadn't slept properly in weeks, wearing sweats and a loose t-shirt with no bra, which was much different than you would usually dress in the middle of the day...but you were still just as beautiful as you were the last time he had seen you

You squealed and practically jumped into his arms. He hugged you back tightly, littering your head with kisses.

You welcome them in and Lucifer immediately notices the plethora of baby stuff littered around your home. Diapers, burp rags, bottles, etc are EVERYWHERE.

"Mc...what's all this?"

Color drains from your face as you remembered you hadnt told him about your pregnancy, nor the child you now had that was his.

A sharp wail of a baby crying made all three of men widen their eyes.

You sigh and ask them to wait moment before exiting the room, only to return moments later with a swaddled baby that looked to be no more than 7 weeks old.

The baby had bright red eyes, little traces of jet black hair, and small curved horns protruding from the sides of its head. Tiny black feathers trailed behind you as you approached Lucifer.

Diavolo was giddy- he loved babies. Barbatos was surprised, but worried about what the consequences would be of this being hidden for so long.

Lucifer however, remained silent. Staring at the baby in your arms.

"Is that..."

"Yeah... [It's] yours."

Lucifer immediately got up and approached you and the child, reaching out to stroke its tiny cheek with his gloved hand.

He didn't realize humans and demons could procreate, otherwise he would have been much more careful during your heated night of passion 11ish months ago.

After the initial shock wore off, he would be very upset you kept this from him

You would explain that you weren't sure if you had wanted to keep it once you found out at the 4 month mark, and after you gave birth you still weren't sure if you would keep the baby- tossing around the idea of adoption

But three weeks ago it sprouted horns and the teenest traces of wings. Needless to say, you were stuck with it.

But you had already kept it from him for 10 months, and you weren't sure how to tell him.

Lucifer would calm down after hearing your reasoning, and immediately request to have Diavolo move to let you live in Devildom indefinitely.

He would also research lifespans of hybrid babies to see if he should find a way to give you Immortality, like Solomon.

Would absolutely be attentive to you and help you raise the baby however he could.

He would learn everything and become just as protective over the baby as he is toward you.

Would also probably propose shortly after you moved back to Devildom.

Overall a pretty good parent, but you are probably doing a lot of the caretaking during the day while he works.

Mammon

You were staring down adoption papers now that you had finally got the baby to go to sleep when your front door burst open.

"Oi! Mc! Where ya at?!"

Mammon trudged through your living room searching for you, completely oblivious to all of the baby stuff sitting around your flat.

You nearly collided with him as you got up and ran to meet him when he entered the kitchen.

Cue adorable lift and spin embrace. (D'awww)

Mammon would then scold you for not talking to him in damn near 3 weeks

"Why are you ignoring my phone calls?! I heard ya talking to Lucifer last night and I couldn't take it anymore!"

Little did he know that you had only been talking to Lucifer to problem solve your situation and ask how you should tell Mammon. His advice was adoption, so you decided to do that...but then three nights ago the baby sprouted horns and started flying around your apartment.

Lucifer had made plans for you to come back next week to talk through options with Diavolo but I guess Mammon beat you to the chase.

After you remained silent at his question he began to take in his surroundings. He began noticing the plethora of baby stuff, the crib that sat in the corner of the living room, the sound-proof foam that covered your ceiling, the adoption papers the fact that you were wearing only maternity bra and shorts...

"Mc...what...are ya- or, were ya..?"

You knew the gears were turning in his head and the sound of the baby screaming again once more gave him his answer.

He followed right behind you as you rushed to the crib to try to silence the baby's cries.

Mammon gasped when he saw the twisted horns, snowy white hair, bright blue eyes, and bat-like wings of the screaming baby before him.

He would hug you and the baby tight, and cry.

He would ask why you didn't tell him, but he wouldn't be too surprised.

He would immediately take you back with him to Devildom after helping you pack like 3-4 diaper bags (he would carry all of them for you)

He would lose it when Lucifer tells him the best option for both of you is adoption by demon parents.

He would fuss until he found out you agreed.

It would take a long ass time to find parents who seemed competent and had no ill intentions though- and Mammon found problems with every potential couple you found.

Eventually you would give up and raise the baby together.

You obvs would move back to Devildom

Mammon is surprisingly a really good dad and eager to learn EVERYTHING and has a really good bond with the baby.

Leviathan

Levi and the rest of his brothers came to visit you- you planned it perfectly around your maternity leave and had a full proof plan to tell him about the baby

What you didn't expect was the brothers arriving a day early to surprise you.

You answered the door while you were breast feeding, as you were expecting a friend to come help you clean up a bit.

Well, cue your shock to be fact to face with the father of your kid.

Levi would see the small purple hairs sprouting from its head, the long snake-like tail wrapped firmly around your arm, and the twig-shaped horns just starting to pop out of its skull and would immediately faint.

All the other brothers would be shocked as well. They never thought Levi would build up the courage to make any sort of move on you.

Once he came to your would explain the situation to him and his brothers.

He is terrified of the idea of being a parent, but he warms up to the thought of it once the baby wraps its tail around him and gurgles happily.

"Do you want to hold [it]?"

"C-can I? ...but what if I drop [it]?!"

You would help settle the baby in his arms to reassure him that he won't drop it.

Once he's holding the baby, good luck getting it back.

The brothers would have to pry it out of his arms in order to get a turn.

He is very giddy and excited when you tell him you want to keep it.

He would beg Lucifer to have you move back.

Though, you would stay in separate rooms for the first week or two.

Not because he doesn't want you or the baby in his room, but because he plans on surprising you!

He and Lucifer budgeted and hired contractors to completely renovate his room.

His on-brand Otaku aesthetic would still be there, but it will be much less of a baby death-trap, and there would be many new things added for the baby and for you!

Overall a decent parent, though you do have to fight with him over the compulsive video game playing sometimes.

Satan

Satan would probably have decided to Video call you rather than go on a spontaneous visit. He would also probably find out the fastest for this reason

He would catch onto your excuses to not video chat for two whole weeks and would have enough of it, demanding you video chat with him to find out what you're hiding.

He honestly had thought you were cheating on him.

He did NOT expect to be greeted on the call by you holding a blonde demon baby with horns that matched his and a bubble-wrapped tail (obv due to how sharp it is. You def got some scars from it whipping you a few times)

He would be awestruck and probably not even be able to find any words

You would def have to explain to him why you kept this hidden, and he probably wouldn't forgive you right off the bat.

"I have to admit though...[it] is pretty cute."

"Just like [its] dad."

He would ask how you would like to approach raisint the baby rather than assuming you'd just want to drop everything and move to Devildom indefinitely.

He would be glad when you say you do want to come live with him.

He would immediately go shopping for parenting books, as well as various kids books and maintaining romantic relationship books (because he absolutely wants to be a better partner to you, particularly since you had felt scared tell him about this)

He would probably move to baby proof your old room and make that your permanent living quarters with him...his room is pretty much unsalvagable lol

He would immediately forgive you for not telling him about the baby once he holds it for the first time.

He is VERY protective of both of you, and will helicopter over every brother who takes turns holding it, and immediately intervene when they overwhelm you or try to bother you when you're finally able to get some rest.

He would develop a shit-eating grin every time the baby spits up on Lucifer.

Asmo

Asmo came to the human world to surprise you with a bunch of gifts (including himself, dressed to the nines) with Solomon's help.

He hadn't seen you outside of the tiny box of his phone in so long, and hadnt really even been able to talk to you at all in about 4 weeks because you noted you were too busy - though he was so excited to see your beautiful smiling face again.

However, he was greeted by a very exhausted, disheveled, and irritable version of you.

Literally looking like you hadn't slept in weeks with how dark the circles under your eyes were, and like you hadn't changed your clothes in at least a couple days.

"Darling you look so awful! What hap-"

*cue screaming baby and a deep annoyed sigh from you.*

You invite the two in and they see that your home matches your disheveled state.

The minute you pick up the baby it stops crying. You give a half-assed explanation, not having the energy to explain the situation further, and noted the Baby demands so much attention you barely can attend to anything other than going to the bathroom and taking short naps while the baby sleeps.

Asmo feels very guilty for not being here to help you. He isn't mad that you hid this from him- he was sure you were probably worried about ruining his reputation as the heartthrob of devildom.

He didn't care about that as much as you- and now this lovely miniature version of him- though.

He offers to hold the baby and give it attention while you get rest. You give him a summary of what each cry means, how to change a diaper, and to wake you up if it needs to eat.

While you slept, Asmo gushed to Solomon about how much the demon looked like him- from the tall twisted horns, the four delicate wings, piercing coral-colored eyes, and the heart-shaped birth marks on its shoulders.

The baby was quiet as long as Asmo held it, and he definitely got a good photoshoot in to post on Devilgram with Solomon's help.

Once you got a few hours of rest and the baby became restless for some nourishment, they woke you up to breast feed and discuss what the next steps were.

Asmo refused to take no for an answer when you noted you were worried about how his fans would react to him having a baby-mamma. He was determined to have you live in with him.

He would get the brothers to help you move while he, Solomon, and the baby go on a shopping spree.

He would absolutely get matching outfits for the three of you, and would get only the best brands of care items for the baby.

He would also treat you to a spa day, taking the baby while you got your nails done, a massage, and a hair cut.

He would definitely get his own attention needs met by the baby, while the baby got its excessive attention needs met by him.

Parenting DEFINITELY became easier with his help. The baby certainly was his without a doubt with how needy it was lol.

Beelzebub

He had planned a trip to the Human world with Lucifer to come visit you since they hadn't seen you in quite a long time.

He liked being able to talk to you on the phone nearly every day, but he missed being able to hug you and take in the sweet scent of your perfume.

As they approached your door, he immediately knew something was up. There was an unusual smell coming from your home.

After you invited them in he saw the bottle you were shaking in your hand and immediately recognized the smell from when he was a baby- even though it was many, many years ago.

It was breast milk.

He nearly pushed past you in excitement to enter the room where he knew the baby would be.

Though he was still shocked when he saw the tiny red-headed being. Its face was quite chubby as it cooed at you to bring it another bottle.

"Mc...that...that baby looks just like me!"

"Well, I'd hope so. [Its] yours, after all."

Beel nearly fainted as the delight completely consumed him.

He begged you to let him feed it, and I mean...you weren't going to argue if your arms finally got a break from holding both the baby and the bottle.

Not only did it look like Beel, but it absolutely had his hunger.

Beel was absolutely glowing, giddily rocking the baby as he fed it. He had completely ignored the fact you hadn't told him about it yet, figuring you had your reasons and all that mattered was that he was here with it- and you- now.

He gushed about how they had the same wing pattern, as well as the same horns and body markings. He felt so connected to the baby and he hadn't even been here 5 minutes.

You questioned why you had been worried about telling him at all.

You chatted with Lucifer about potentially moving to Devildom and he assured you he'd figure out the logistics.

Beel was excited to have you stay with him and Belphie, getting Lucifer to arrange for renovations on their room to accommodate two more individuals in addition to him and Belphie.

Once you all actually moved in, he was very protective of the baby, only letting the brothers have limited holding time (with the exception of Belphie of course)

He always offers to feed it for you- especially after seeing how exhausted you would get holding it and having it latch onto your breasts all the time.

He would be a pro at mixing formula and would absolutely massage your shoulders while you pumped.

He is ELATED to be a dad, and he's even more happy that he gets to be a parent along side you.

Belphie

Absolutely another one who would just try to video chat with you instead of trying to make a trip to the human world.

Mehhh... loved you, but his bed was calling to him.

He would be half awake while he talked to you, but he was happy to hear your voice and see your smiling face.

"Hey Belph, I have something kind of important to tell you..."

His attention would perk up at your worried tone and he would wake up a little more, giving you his undivided attention.

You hesitated before turning the camera view around and revealing a tiny creature with dark hair, similar horns to his, dark splotches covering its body, and a long tail with a disheveled floof on the end of it, curled up in a crib.

Belphie is shocked, so much so that he's sort of in denial.

"What...what is that."

"Belphie, its our child."

"No...that can't be..."

Belphie would probably not know how to react and would probably say something mean unintentionally.

He would apologize though.

Probably not too hurt that you didn't tell him...after all, he did try to kill you at one point, so it was probably fair that you didn't want to tell him that he was your baby daddy.

Once he sees you in person though, he would be much more attentive and back to his soft and snugly self.

He would be VERY worried about hurting the baby, so he probably wouldn't want to hold it for a long time.

It will take lots of reassurance to get him to hold the baby...but once he does he will never want to let it go.

Belphie is a very protective parent, often only letting Beel get any alone time with it. He would probably growl if any of the other brothers got near it until you convince him its fine.

His cow pillow? Yeah, that's now exclusively for the baby. He'll get another one though.

Def takes naps next to the baby all the time, and will often help change diapers without question.

Though you probably would be the one doing most of the feeding- primarily because both of them have fallen asleep during feeding time.

Over all, a baby with Belphie would be a piece of cake. It tends to sleep a lot and isn't too fussy, so you both still get lots of alone time to recharge.

[catgirlforkaeya]

kaeya relationship hcs

kaeya x gn!reader

little bit of everything (fluff, hurt/comfort, crack, little bit of angst)

also kinda a modern au ig idk tvs exist

warnings: not proofread + all lowercase

a/n: i’m procrastinating requests and sleep rn so take these. there’s no specific theme just random hcs my sleep deprived brain thought of. i’ll add onto this randomly probably but feel free to comment hcs in the comments/ send to dms or ask box i would love to hear them (pls i am desperate)

!! also spoilers for kaeya’s lore, if u don’t know it i recommend looking it up before u read this !!

ok i’m gonna start with the obvious stuff here: i see a lot of people saying “oh kaeya would manipulate his s/o and cheat on them blah blah blah” then continues to say stuff that makes him seem like an ass (if you’ve ever said this dni /hj). the poor guy has lost sm people in his life & more than likely has abandonment issues so why would he purposely do something to drive his s/o away/hurt them? plus it’s canon that he really only is manipulative when it comes to getting information out of people which is normal in that line of work ig

more utc!!

i feel like he’d be possessive over you but not in a creepy insane way more of a “i don’t want to lose you so i do my best to keep tabs on you to make sure you’re safe” (a caring way ig)

very touchy. he doesn’t go all out in public (just a half on the waist, holding hands, sharing kisses, small acts like that) but in private my god he cannot keep his hands off of you. constantly is cuddling with you, runs his hands up and down your body during makeout sessions, playing with your hair while you two sit on the couch/lay in bed watching tv. literally does everything he can to constantly be touching you

NECK KISSES. kaeya would 100% love neck kisses (giving and receiving). sometimes his neck kisses are soft and other times they’re rougher. he def leaves a hickey on you at least once or twice a week. and when you give him a kiss on the neck he’d melt on the spot

isn’t very open with you at first but once you two get further into your relationship & you prove that he can trust you he’ll open up about stuff. it’ll be a slow process because he’s never really shared any of this with people & he’s scared what you’ll think of him after you learn about his past

def rarely ever cries. you always remind him that it’s okay to cry but hes gotten so used to bottling up emotions he just doesn’t know how to cry whenever he wants. when he does finally break though it’s basically non-stop for a few hours. weeks, months, even years of emotions are bottled up in his body so a lot comes out when he breaks. you are always there for him no matter what. holding him in ur arms as he cries into your shoulder, giving advice the best you can, giving small reminders that you love him in between kisses

insomnia. this man has been through so much shit i feel like he just has frequent nightmares of stuff. those nightmares cause him to be scared to sleep for a day or two because he doesn’t want to experience it again. you do your best to stay up w him to keep company but you usually crash around 3-4am

hates storms. his lore mentioned there was a bad storm when his father left him & the night crepus died and that whole fiasco afterwards so it’d make sense. tries his best to hide it at first but eventually gives up. usually just turns the tv up high and buries his head into your chest

drinks a lot (which is obvious) even at home. whenever he starts having problems mentally he drowns it with alcohol. it’s never a problem because he honestly is just a sad drunk and usually ends up venting about stuff randomly but it just concerns you. probably stopped drinking as much since you came into his life tho

has scars/burn marks that he’s insecure about but when you trace them/give them kisses all those insecurities fade away

overworks himself. ik he’s seen as lazy and stuff but i feel like he’d purposely just drown himself in work as a distraction from life to the point you have to go and drag him out of his office

ok back to happy stuff, he definitely likes it when you play with his hair. most likely is very touch starved so that small action is like heaven to him

his love language is a mix of all of them but prob mostly touch, words of affirmation, or acts of service

uses a lot of pet names for you but mostly uses darling, sweetheart, hun, babe, or love

when he works late shifts and you fall asleep before he gets home he will probably feel awful (even tho you’ve reminded him that it’s okay & you understand). crawls into bed and holds you in his arms while whisper sweet nothings even if you’re dead asleep. does his best to not wake you but sometimes does just to let you know he’s home safe

takes you stargazing. i feel like kaeya likes the stars bc he finds peace in them somehow. will 100% take you onto rooftops in mondstadt at random hours to lay up there and look at the sky. would say some cheesy comment like “out of all of these stars you light up my night the most”

loves taking showers/baths together. even if you don’t actually shower he enjoys it either way. half the time you can never get anything done because he’s just giving a bunch of kisses and teasing you

absolutely loves seeing you in his clothes. he finds it adorable and if the shirt is oversized on you that’s even better for him

he will paint your nails. i’m not going into detail here he would just simply paint them i’m not taking any arguments

the last like hour before you two go to bed he just constantly reminds you how much he loves you, how much you mean to him, how he wants to have a future with you, etc while he holds you close in his arms

you don’t have to fight over blankets since he sleeps so close to you it doesn’t matter you two have plenty of blanket space

prefers being the big spoon but doesn’t mind being the little spoon occasionally. when he’s the big spoon he feels like he can protect you more

has you sleep on his side where his eyepatch isn’t at (i can’t remember what side it’s on i’m sorry it’s 4am rn). at first you didn’t really understand but he later explained that he just feels he can protect you better (when he gets comfortable enough to take it off it doesn’t matter what side)

as i’ve mentioned in these past few points kaeya is VERY protective of you. again not in a weird way he just doesn’t want you to get ripped away from him. if u mention somebody fucked with you he’d “talk to them in private” and then they’d never mess with you again

i feel like he’s a good cook idk he just has that energy, it’s not something he talks about but is good at it and really only ever cooks for the two of you

will take care of you the best he can when you’re sick. you scold him saying he’s going to get sick too but he doesn’t listen

absolutely LOVES books and reads in his freetime. it’s kinda a guilty pleasure for him but he constantly shares it with you and sometimes even has you read it with him

takes you ice skating in the winter, he’s prob a pro at it and loves teaching you how to skate

cold ass hands. i mean he’s a cryo user what would you expect. it’s helpful in the summer though

barely ever wears a shirt on around the house, even if it’s cold as hell he just doesn’t put one on. you don’t mind seeing him shirtless but u are always so lost on how he doesn’t get cold at all

gets you a lot of random gifts— half the time you don’t even expect them but you love and cherish them because they came from kaeya

© all rights reserved to catgirlforkaeya. reposting, plagiarizing, modifying, and translating is NOT allowed.

[vivi-taylorsversion]

Being Diego Hargreeves Daughter would include...

Type: Fluff. Just pure fluffiness

Summary: Headcanons on what it would be like to be Diego Hargreeves Daughter

Age: 0-4 (I imagine them around this age but I might do an older version)

Warnings: Threats (I guess?)

Onto the headcanons...

• Diego and some woman hooked up which resulted in none other than you. After the woman decided she didn't want kids Diego was left to take care of you

• He didn't care though

• One of the things he loved the most was that you shared his powers with him

• He absoloutely adored you

• His family were a whole other story when it came to loving you

• Luther, even though not liking Diego, liked you

• He didn't exactly love you since you were a lot like Diego but he thought you were cute and occasionally held you

• Allison absoloutely loved you

• She spoiled you rotten

• You had the absoloute best clothes

• Klaus though

• He practically was glued to you

• You adored him and absoloutely loved everything about him

• Especially his coat and even better he would bounce you in the air (Diego would have to be absent and considering how overprotective Diego would be it only happened on rare occasions)

• Five would pretend not to care about you however he would kill anyone who made you cry.

• Doesn't matter if they just did something they didnt know you hated or anything like that he would still straight up kill them.

• If it was a family member however he would just tear you from their arms, scold them for making you cry and hush you

• " She obviously doesn't like it you moron! Just give her to me!"

• He wouldn't care who it was. It could be Diego and he'd still act that way

• After that he would proceed to carry you around on his hip practically the whole day

• Ben was dead so you couldnt see or hear him but from what Klaus had said he cared about you

• However he cared about you a lot more than Klaus said

• You never really met Vanya considering she exposed everyone secrets in her book.

• ANYWAYYY

• Diego is so overprotective.

• Literally purely mama bear

• Your first word was either: Knife, Klaus, Five or Dada

• I will not take any arguments on that

• He would get extremely mad when you touched his knives and when you were younger even considered throwing them away incase you got ahold of one

• Diego would have to try his best to not give into the temptation of giving you sweets after your bedtime and remind himself it's not good for you

• Diego would get Allison to teach him how to braid and stuff like that so he could make you hair all cute

• He would always leave you with Klaus at night when he had to go out and be a vigilante and stuff like that

• He would always come back to see you lying on Klaus' chest, nuzzling into him, while he has an arm around you and is burrowing his face into your hair

• He would get extremely either smug or embarrased whenever you assumed Patch was your new mom or something

• He would get you something like a staffordshire bull terrier (Fun fact: I have one and he's adorable!) or doberman to protect you if he couldn't

• It sort of defeated the whole purpose when the dog ended up being a huge softie and would cuddle with you 24/7

• Would watch any show with you regardless of how kiddy it is and ends up watching stuff like Gravity Falls with you every day

• He would eventually let you do trick or treating with Klaus however he'd make sure Allison or Five would also be there so you don't end up getting killed

• Being scarily like your father

• Him being one of the only people who could calm you down during a tantrum. Those people being: Diego, Five and Klaus (Sometimes Eudora)

• (Spoiler for S1:E4) You also saw Eudora as a mother figure so when she died it broke your heart but we'll just pretend it never happened

• Affectionate hair ruffling is a must.

•Nicknaming you:

1. Princesa (Princess)

2. Osito (Little Bear)

3. Estrellita (Little Star)

4. Pequeña dama (Little Lady)

5. Pequeño (Little One)

6. Little Knife

•Lives for nicknames. Loves them

•You prob call him dada or something like that

REQUESTS ARE OPEN

Rules for requesting here

[an-angel-in-the-garden]

Dating the Obey Me! boys

So I had surgery yesterday and have to be stuck in my room not doing much for a bit so I plan to try and write lots of things and I thought why not start with Obey Me. Hope you enjoy, these are also kinda short since it was so many people! CW: Spoilers and slightly dark

Lucifer

Dating Lucifer is a bit of a struggle at the start

He's headstrong and cruel even to those he care's about so it can be hard to get into a relationship with him

Once that bond is formed however its a different story though he is still blunt and a bit harsh he's more open

He enjoys classic dates candle lit dinners walks under the moon or swaying in his office with his records on

Lucifer adores when you visit him in his office just to spend time with him while he works

Not much PDA but not fully against it will wrap an arm around your waist and might kiss your head if he's feeling really soft that day

Supportive even if he's harsh he wants the best for you in his eyes you deserver the world and then some

Mammon

Mammon is very open about his feelings

Not good with PDA gets very embarrassed but loves it all the same

Will spend money on you without really thinking about it he wants to you everything and in his eyes money is everything

He gets you involved with many schemes but also does everything in his power to not let you get hurt

If any of his siblings are having a bad day and it gets taken out on you he steps in and will swing if needed

Speaking of siblings they dont treat him that well and though he tends to put on a front you kindness to him means so much he can and will cry

Soft just wants you happy your smile makes him feel special and truly loved so he wants you to feel the same

Leviathan

This is a roller coaster that's for sure

Leviathan is a tsundere on the surface but once in a relationship he's a bit more yandere then one might think

With that Levi is very tameable quelling any jealousy of another he might have is simple just give him affection

He can not handle PDA he blushes freaks out and might even faint if people are around

Indoor dates in his aquarium room and also gaming together or watching anime

Though he's not one to enjoy the outdoors if you want to go on a public date all you need to do is ask

Parise for him is heavenly you telling him he's done well or that he makes you happy means he world to him

Satan

Getting into a relationship with Satan is a friends to lovers kinda story he need so much trust to know he can be truly honest with you

Its very give and take he wants this to have the same importance on both side

Café dates often to a cat café and if you allergic dont worry he has a spell for that

Will show off your relationship to everyone

Enjoy soft PDA i.e. hand holding an arm around the waist forehead kisses etc.

Really loves talking with you about books whether about a book you both have read or simply you listening as he goes on about one he likes, Satan also loves hearing you talks about your interest

Hell protect you with his life you're someone who let him feel more then just anger someone who loves him for himself and its all he really wanted

Asmodeus

Dating Asmodesu is not easy and there's a chance it will never be a healthy relationship

He's flirts alot and that's something you have to get use to but Asmo try's very hard to never take it to far once your together

Love PDA will always want to be all over you and hopes you feel the same

Shopping dates are a must in his eyes and of you ever feel self conscious he does his best to help

Talks about you non stop to anyone and everyone he's happy your in his life but in the end his sin makes it quite hard to ever be in a fully committed relationship

Spoils you so much, wants you to live in luxury like him after all someone as perfect as you deserves it

The genuine affection and love is something new to him its something he never thought he would have so when you entered his life he felt you could only ever make things brighter and he plans to always be there for you

Beelzebub

This is a relationship that develops without much thought

It becomes a habit for Beel to share his food with you or to seek you out just to be with you for a while

At some point its pointed out how you both act and Beelzebub confesses

Dates are common and its often food date going to new and old places he thinks you would like

Not great at planning things but if you have something you want to do or talk about he's all in

Very soft with you though its not often that hell innate PDA or anything he's always up to reciprocate it

A gentle giant who wants you safe and happy even if it means sharing his snacks

Belphegor

This is a full slow burn with his hatred of humans and his lack of trust its not an easy ride

Being with him takes a while starting as just people to friends to maybe more to lovers its a drawn out thing

No PDA he just doesn't handle it well however at the house or alone he's very affectionate

You all go on dates rarely as he's not one for going out and would rather spend quite time with you at home

One of his favorite things to do with you is laze around while you talk about your day or things you've been into lately

Will always make sure you have a good nights sleep if your someone prone to bad dreams he can help with that

Though the relationship with him starts a little rocky he treasures you more then he might admit and he happy you gave him a chance

Diavolo

Another friends to lovers and a little forbidden on top of that but you two make it work

It starts as just him being overly interested in the human world and not so slowly he starts to take interest in just you

Diavolo spoils you when he can you've given him so much and he wants to give back

Loves PDA but knows that he has to reel it in due to him tittle so he settles for just holding your hand

Is a very soft demon for you wanting to make you're as comfortable as you can be

Really enjoys when you visit him even if it just you popping in to say hi it just brightens his day

Being in a relationship wit Diavolo isn't easy it takes alot to keep up with everything but he's never been happier then with you by his side

Barbatos (I love him so much so his is slightly longer)

A slow burn and secret relationship full of its ups and downs yet its something he wouldn't trade for anything

The start of the relationship is slow and honestly it doesn't even seem like your dating he's still closed off only being polite when you two are together

It takes him far longer then you would think for him to realize how much that hurts you he hasn't been wit someone for so long if ever he's not use to it

Once you break that barrier things are smoother he's willing to be open with you alone giving you affection when you ask and even sometimes acting with out you saying anything

Barbatos thinks about you alot when he's working always wanting to know what your up to and how your feeling

Wont want to tell anyone he takes his work very seriously and doesn't want that to ever be at risk but on top of that he knows some people dont like him and if they know about you well he doesn't want to think about that

Refuses to look into your future he knows he wont be able to handle what hell see

It a relationship that takes time and sometime it seems like it might slip away but he's always there and he strives to be with you and make you happy just please give him all your love too

Simeon

A story tale romance most the time but one that almost seems impossible to keep

He's the perfect gentlemen sweet moonlight date or strolls through a garden, holding the door open or offering you his coat

With that it might seem like you never see the real him just the person/angle that he wants you to see someone perfect

Once you two have been together a few months hell start to really open up letting you see his more mischievous side and even talking about the pain from when the others fell

Simeon will always be there for you and when your down he wants to be someone you can lean on

The two of you in the in his room the soft lighting thanks to the fire with the only sounds in the room being the scribble of pen on paper and quite breathing making the night feel like endless bliss

He knows this relationship is dangerous if he's not careful he could fall but when you look at him eyes shinning with nothing but love he thinks maybe that wouldn't be so bad

Solomon

An almost tragic love story that much to his glee ends in happiness

He's met you in many lifetimes yet you were never his bit this time this wonderful time you choose him

The most romantic dates with Solomon anything you want he can probably get

Tried to cook for you it didn't go well but man he tried

Helps you study and will partake in your hobbies if you want

Is ok with PDA prefers the simple stuff over anything major

Is such a lovely relationship one he's spent so long waiting for and he's wont let it slip away now

[extravaguk]

sex education 2.0

pairing: college!au, jungkook x reader

summary: "Are you calling me boring?" Jungkook gasps dramatically, looking at you dumbfounded and visibly offended. You roll your eyes, taking a napkin and leaning forward to wipe the crumbs of garlic bread on his lips.

"First of all, don't talk with your mouth full, you pig. Second of all," you stop to take a sip of your coke, aware of Jungkook's expectant eyes on you. "A little, yeah." 

wordcount: 9k

genre: smut - angst(? not rlly - fluff, like tons bc im a slut for fluff

rated: m (duh!2.0)

warnings: alcohol and weed consumption, just jk and tae being bros having bro convos, switch!reader, switch!jk, but mostly dom!jk, dirty talk, glimpses of poorly written bdsm, reader being a jealous and ‘insecure little bitch’ (her words, not mine),slapping (dont worry i tried to make it funny), how i met your mother spoilers (sorry im a gemini i spoil shit), spanking, degradation kink, back at it again with the spit kink, slight anal play, beware!of jungkook being a sweetheart, a lil mean at the end but a sweetheart nontheless.

read sex education here!

Three months of being in an actual commitment with Jeon Jungkook, your brother's partner in crime since the young age of five and, therefore, a common denominator throughout your childhood and teenage years, has proven to you a few things you never knew you would discover about the boy himself: Jeon Jungkook is definitely not what you thought him to be. 

You thought growing up with him would've been enough telltale about everything that made Jungkook be, well, Jungkook. He wasn't as immature as you had believed prior to the beginning of your relationship, he was funnier than you remembered -although maybe you found him funnier now that Taehyung wasn't in the picture to interfere with infantile inside jokes that you never were able to grasp-, and smarter than he had ever let you known before. Although you're sure the main reason his grades had started to improve was solely you and the way you rewarded him by opening your legs everytime he passed an exam. 

But above all, if there was something that had truly surprised you about Jeon Jungkook was the fact that he was truly an absolutely and undeniably softie.  

You loved it. Loved the random scribbled love notes he sometimes left in your backpack before kissing you goodbye to leave for his own class, loved the Spotify playlists he made exclusively just for you -with genres that varied between sappy and romantic and wanting to tear your 'wet ass pussy' in two-, loved the late night texts filled with emojis telling you how much he missed you when both of you were too busy doing assignments and studying to see each other -even if it hadn't even been 48 hours since you last saw each other-. You loved how careful and sweet and thoughtful he was. You really did. 

But.

"Are you calling me boring?" Jungkook gasps dramatically, looking at you dumbfounded and visibly offended. You roll your eyes, taking a napkin and leaning forward to wipe the crumbs of garlic bread on his lips.

"First of all, don't talk with your mouth full, you pig. Second of all," you stop to take a sip of your coke, aware of Jungkook's expectant eyes on you. "A little, yeah." His mouth falls open and you supress a laugh. You really shouldn't be enjoying this so much, but there's something about Jungkook's reaction to his ego being bruised and that terribly adorable pout on his face that just makes your insides tingle with joy. 

"What do you mean? I've had plenty of girls in bed before you, like a whole lot, and none of them have ever called me boring! They loved this adventurous and fun dick, alright? Why do you think-" you raise a brow, scrutinizingly. It still amazes you how with just a simple expression and no words needed, you can make all color from Jungkook's face banish and how quick he is to reach for your hand across his bed. "But I only love youuuu, and you're the best thing that has ever happened to me and my dick like, baby, have I mentioned how head over heels I'm for you?"

"Only like five times today." rolling your eyes again, you pull your hand from his to toy with the peperoni piece on your slice of pizza. Jungkook swallows the lump in his throat, he was starting to get truly concerned now. You couldn't possibly...?

"Are you not satisfied? I mean, do I not make you feel good or...?" there's clear worry in his voice and that makes you meet his eyes, shaking your head hurriedly. Now it's you who take his hand in yours.  

"No! No, babe. I love sex with you! I love everything you do to me, I love how you treat me, I love how you make me feel. I'm a hundred percent satisfied, I swear, It's just..." you sigh, dropping your gaze to rub slow and reassuring circles to the ink adorning his skin. "All I'm saying is... I may also want to experience what all those girls have experienced with you, y'know... the not so vanilla stuff. But you always seem to be scared to try new things with me, and I don't know if it's because of m-"

"Baby," Jungkooks soft voice calls out to you, removing the pizza box in between the two of you to slide closer to you on the mattress. He craddles your face with his fingers, tilting your chin up to make eye contact with you. "_____, don't say that. I just don't ever want to cross any boundaries. I don't want to hurt you or do anything you might not like or regret later, you know that, right?" placing a small kiss on your lips, you hum in content nodding your head yes.

"I know that." you pull him for another brief kiss, oddly not caring about the faint taste of garlic and spice on them because that's what love will do to you. "But what if I do want you to hurt me? What if I want you to fuck my mouth with no mercy until I cry and slap my face after you've cum all over it while you call me a slut?" you pause, eyes meeting his through your eyelashes. "Or viceversa."

It's not that Jungkook is afraid. Because Jungkook is afraid of nothing in this world. He will murder any spider in his way, he will throw a punch to anyone who denies mint chocolate ice cream as the superior ice cream flavour -and he knows that means he will have to literally fight like the entire population on planet earth-, and he will Rey Mysterio you if you ever discredit or deny his incredible skills playing Overwatch.

Jeon Jungkook prides himself in being fearless in every aspect of his life. Except when it comes to you. 

So yeah, maybe he was a little afraid. Because hearing you use the words 'choke', 'slap' and 'slut' in the same sentence did things to him that he didn't deem possible considering none of you were newbies anymore to intimicy. You have been together for three months, for God's sake, but you still made his cock twitch like the first day and he's sure in twenty years you'll have the exact same effect on him.

He didn't want his most primal instincts to overpower the respect and love he'd harboured for you since you were kids because at the end of the day, one, you were still his best friend's little sister, two, he appreciated you too much to ever cross any lines, and three, as cliché as it sounded, you were nothing compared to the girls he had been with previously. What he feels towards you cannot be compared to anything he had experienced before. 

And fuck, was he in a predicament. Because you made him weak in his knees for you and you were not even aware of it. You were not aware of how badly he has wanted to explore and take things way further, way out of both his and your comfort zones. But he's terrified. He's terrified because all he wants is to to take care of you and what if he fails at the one thing he's swore to himself? What if he lets the darkest side of him consume him and at the same time consume you? What if he does actually hurt you, not just psichologically but also physically?

He would never be able to forgive himself. And neither could Taehyung.

And that, was also tormenting him.

Taehyung seemed fine with the two of you dating -or at least that blow to Jungkook's face seemed to ease things between them-, but Jungkook is not dumb and has felt his best friend slowly distancing himself. 

Sure, they were still best friends and will ever will. Taehyung is loyal to Jungkook and Jungkook is loyal to Taehyung. Has been that way since they were five and that will not change just because Jungkook's caught feelings for his little sister.

But the phonecalls were not as often and not as long as they used to be; in rare occasions Jungkook could sense a certain type of awkwardness between them that really had never happened in their friendship, and sometimes Taehyung's jokes seemed to hold more truth than lightheartedness. 

And to top it all off, Jungkook's dilemma regarding you was eating him alive and, usually he would turn to Taehyung for girl advice, only to later realize he was also frightened of doing that. 

But a Friday night at 2 a.m, Jungkook decides he can't take it anymore. 

"Sup, man." Taehyung's voice answers Jungkook's phone call on the second ring, like he always does. 

"Hey, bro." Jungkook clears his voice, suddenly feeling self conscious. "Are you busy?"

"I don't know," his friend seems to be chewing on what Jungkook bets is red Skittles -yes, only the red ones- because he just knows him too well. "Are you busy still fucking my little sister?" 

Taehyung chuckles at his own joke, but Jungkook doesn't. He knows there's no malice, but he can't help to think there might be. He settles for a sigh. "Yeah." he can hear some shuffling on the other side and the clicking of a computer mouse. Jungkook would also bet he was playing Among Us and he would lie if he said he wasn’t disappointed he hadn't called him to play with him. "Y'know what, it's not even important, I'll just call y-"

"Come on, man. You haven't even laughed at that and you usually laugh at everything I say even when no one else does." Taehyung swirls in his chair, his attention fully focused on his best friend. "Seriously, what's bothering you." Jungkook takes a deep breath, rubbing the side of his face. 

"It's about _____."

"_____? As in, my little sister? Who you're fucking?"  

"Tae, dude-"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Go on." Taehyung stiffles a laugh and waits patiently for Jungkook to continue.

"She um... Fuck, I hope this isn't weird, dude. I really do. She wants to like... rough it up in the bedroom, I guess? And I just... I don’t know... I'm terrified dude." There's silence filling the gap between Taehyung and Jungkook and Jungkook almost feels like throwing up. 

"You're coming to me for sex advice... about my little sister?"

"I know, dude but... Who else I'm supossed to talk to? Jimin? Hoseok?" Jungkook sits up on his bed, an ugly knot beginning to form in his stomach. "I mean, you're my best friend," Jungkook swallows again, voice cracking. "...right?"

It's Taehyung's turn to sigh after a few seconds before he replies. "Forever and always, bro." His tone settles Jungkook's uneasiness. There's nothing but honesty in it. "Listen, Guk. I really don't know what kind of advice to give you because, literally, ew. But I do know my sister, and if that's what she wants and she's communicated with you about it, it’s because she trusts you. And I trust you more than anyone in my life. So there you go, man."

Relief washes all over Jungkook's body and he lays back on the bed again, heart not beating as hard as it was a few seconds ago. 

"Thanks, dude." Jungkook smiles. "Sorry for calling you so late."

"No problem, bro." Taehyung smiles as well, swirling his chair back to his computer screen. A weight of his own being lifted. "Among Us next time?"

"Yeah, I'll let you know. Good night, bro."  

Taehyung calls Jungkook's name before he can hang up. "Hey, man?"

"Yeah, man?"

There's a pause between them and then Taehyung speaks. "I love you, man."

Jungkook supresses the threat of tears about to spill because he knows Taehyung would try to bruise his other other eyebrow if he ever found out. Or hug him to death. Or both.

"I love you too, bro."

"This reminds me of the first time you gave me a blowjob." Jungkook chuckles, watching you get down on your knees between his spread thighs, make up free and sporting a similar low messy bun as that time he's mentioning, except this time you're wearing one of his hoodies engulfing your smaller frame. Proof that this time around, you're exclusively his and no one else’s.

"You mean the blowjob of your life." you giggle as you reach out to pull down his sweatpants, deligthed to see he decided on not wearing any underwear. Your spit on the back of your hand and immediately wrap it around the base of his rock hard cock while his own darts out to push the strands falling down your face behind your ear, heart eyes emoji looking down at you looking up at him. 

Your tongue swirls around the tip timidly, swallowing the drop of precum oozing as he sighs heavily and lovingly. "Every blowjob you give me is the blowjob of my life." he unties your hair from the band holding it together because he prefers his fingers to be the hair tie, prefers to be the one to guide the bobbing of your head up and down his dick. 

You hum in appreciation against him, cherry balmed lips wrapping fully around the head of his cock and he hums back. "Love seeing you on your knees for me with your pretty mouth stuffed, fuck." You take him deeper, closing your eyes. 

Your hand moving accordingly to your mouth and your panties already wet, clinging to your folds. It's really not your fault Jungkook is the most delicious eye candy on earth and how fast can the mere sight of him make your pussy lips quiver. You slurp around the head obscenely , a moan of yours mixing with a moan of his. "Hands on your back." 

You obligue, removing your hands and growing excited at the dominating low tone his voice exerts. The grip he has on your hair tightens and controls your motions, pushing you further down his dripping shaft until your nose hits his pubic bone. He holds you there, his own eyes closing shut and his dick twitching insde your mouth. A thrust of his hips make you gag and has one of your hands flying to tap his leg two times, letting him know you were in need for air. 

He releases you, pulling you back until his cock is pulsating in front of you. He looks down at you, both breathless but the difference is you look so messy. Eyes watery, chest moving heavily and saliva leaking from your lips. 

Yeah, there was a reason Jungkook hasn't been like this with you before. The sight of you submitting completely and looking so nasty was too much for him to handle. He might never want to see you any other way than this. 

"Isn't this what you wanted, huh?" the free hand that had been supporting his weight on the matress grasps your face harshly, making you lock eyes with him.

 "I thought you wanted me to choke you with my cock like a little whore?" you nod your head eagerly, unable to form words. Your pussy throbs, prompting you to rub your thighs to get some sort of relief as his thumb smears the spit adorning your lips. You're quick to envelop it in the warmth of your mouth, an involuntary moan leaving your throat. "Such a pretty slut," he lets his cock slap against your cheek, removing his thumb to move his hand back to his previous position. "Open again."

You do, his length entering your mouth again -that you gladly accept- and then he's shoving you down by your hair. "Shit, gonna fuck your mouth so good..." 

And he does, not holding back anymore, his hand thrusting your head along his shaft until your throat tightens around him repeteadly, struggling for breath. But you take it, you take the aggresiveness and the degradation because fuck, you've been waiting for so long to know what this feels like. To have Jungkook be mean and have this type of control and power over you and you're enjoying it a bit too much. 

"F-fuck, I'm gonna cum, leave your mouth open." he releases on your tongue, not able to look away from the image of you with tears falling down your eyes and mouth drenched with him and your spit, some of his cum staining down your chin and the corners of your lips that he gathers with his thumb and pushes back into your mouth. He groans, watching you swallow all of it like a good girl, your tongue grazing around his digit for the remainings, gaze not leaving his. "Let me grab my phone real quick, I need to take a picture of this."

You were definitely not the jealous type.  

You prided yourself on being able to recognize when your behaviours were due to your own insecurities and removing all sorts of feelings of uncertainty from your mind. You never liked toxic patterns or the glamorization of them and your relationship with Jungkook was proof. You knew relationships were supossed to be based on blind trust and faith in your partner and yours definitely reciprocated in the same way. 

"So can anybody tell me why Eunha is basically all over my boyfriend right now?" you wish you could blame your state on Hoseok's weed, who's sitting on the left side of the couch right next to you at the frat party. You really wish you could have an explanation for the way your heart tugged in such a weird way and your stomach swirled dangerously until almost making you nauseous. You really tried to blame your overthinking on the joint you had just passed to your friend. 

You knew it was bound to happen someday, especially considering Jungkook had always been a ladies' man and the kind of attraction from both men and women he was able to manifest, willing or unwillingly. You just never thought it would happen so soon and in such way that made you clench your fists so tight and your nails dig into the palm of your hands so painfully. 

"I mean, they did have like a long fling a few years ago, didn't they?" Seulgi, sitting on your right, chimes in. 

That was true. Longer than most flings Jungkook ever had before you.  

"Yeah, before she dumped him." Hoseok adds.

Your eye twitches and your jaw contracts. Because that, was also true, and it was mostly what was bothering you so much. 

Had it been Jungkook the one to move away from his situationship with Eunha like with most girls, you wouldn't have such a problem with the way she's shamelessly leaning towards him from across the room. Or the way she's twirling a strand of her hair between one of her fingers while battling her lashes. Or the way she's hysterically laughing at whatever he was saying, because your boyfriend was funny, but he was not that funny. 

You were not the jealous type, and Jungkook definitely wasn't giving you any reason to be, because as coquettish as the blonde was being or as provocatively as she was pushing her tits into his arm, he politely keeps his distance and tries to also engage with Jimin in conversation, leaving her pouting. But that wasn't enough to not make you start seriously questioning your feminist ethics right now. 

"Wait, you're not jealous, are you?" Seulgi turns to you, offering you the joint -how long had you been focusing your attention on Jungkook and Eunha to not realize it was your turn again to smoke?-. You take it, hesitating between answering right away or taking a hit before doing that. You were never a good liar. You look between your two friends who are looking back at you with their eyebrows raised.

"I-" you close your mouth and run your fingers through your hair. "Maybe? I don't know what I'm feeling and I don't like it one bit." 

"Aw, babe." Seulgi squeezes your knee, eyes showing you sympathy. "Jealousy is a natural response to any relationship."

"I know..." you take the joint in your hand, taking a long drag before letting the smoke out. "I just don't want to sound like an insecure little bitch!" you whine. "I don't want to be like 'Oh, why would Jeon Jungkook, a God of the Olympus, dare give his attention to a peasant as unworthy as me!?' Like no, he's just a man. A little less mediocre than most but a man nontheless. I'm not going to doubt myself or other women just because he's more beautiful than most, and hotter, and funnier and has a massive co-" you notice you're getting carried away by the look of disgust in Hoseok's face and Seulgi trying to hold back a laugh. 

"Anyways, he's lucky to have me. We're both lucky to have each other but sometimes I feel like I might be the luckiest out of the two. And seeing Eunha looking so pretty and throwing herself at him is triggering me because..." you pause to take a deep breath and lounch back on the couch. "What if he realizes one day that I'm luckier than he is and he could be luckier with someone else?"

There's, ironically, a long silence. Ironically because the sound of Travis Scott making the walls tremble is anything but, until Hoseok speaks.

"I think you feel that way because you still haven't seen how that boy looks at you, _____." and then he motions to the spot from across the room you had been observing for too long, the spot where Jungkook is now glancing at you after noticing your detectable distress, with a frown on his features. 

'You okay?' he mouthes, his fist raising in the air in a thumbs up, questioningly.  

Your heart jerks, and not out of bitterness or envy caused by a girl trying to get your boyfriend's attention. Because his attention is always entirely on you, no matter how many feet are separating the two of you. 

'Yes' you mouth back, with a nod of your head and an encouraging smile that has formed itself on your face. He beams as well at you. Mouthes an 'I love you' and puckers his lips in a flying kiss that makes you giggle. You mimic him, your heart tight against your chest. 

Hoseok is right. You have nothing to worry about.

Jungkook is in love with you. Sometimes, he thinks, he's too in love with you.

"Can't believe I'm letting you do this."

"Can't believe you're such a pussy."

Jungkook huffs in annoyance. He would smack your ass right now if his hands weren't restricted by a scarf of yours he had never seen before to your bedpost. He would also send you a mean look if his eyes weren't covered by the only tie he owned and had so generously lent to you. 

When you mentioned you wanted to try this, he expected you to be in this position. Not the other way around.

He's sprawled on your bed, only his boxers covering him as your legs straddle his waist and you tighten the hold of the scarf around his wrists sternly. He winces and manages an 'Hey!' He knows you're only wearing your panties because he can't feel anything else and he's felt one of your naked tits brushing  his face as you tied him up. He also tried to catch one of your nipples in his mouth as a form of punishment, to no use because you swiftly backed away from his attempt. 

"I've never been a bottom before, this is new for me." he says. He really doesn't mind any of this. He's just not used to it. He knows he'd be lying if he said it didn't turn him on a little bit, even if he'd rather be the one to have you completely unmoving and naked beneath him. Especially now that you're skimming your nails up and down his torso.

"Mm, good to know." your lips follow the path your fingers created, from the center of his chest up, moving steadily and tracing soft kisses over his flesh. 

"Don't worry. I'll be gentle." you croon, dragging your tongue from the pulse of his neck to his earlobe, nails scraping lightly over his left nipple. Jungkook shudders, air sucked in through his teeth as his mouth opens on its own. Taking advantage of this, you place a kiss on the corner of his lips before slipping your tongue inside. 

He answers simultaniously, his own tangling with yours, swallowing each other's moans. Your hips set a slow peace, clothed cad core griding over the length poking between your thighs. His hips move unvoluntarily, trying to find some sort of friction to make up for the fact that his hands are unavailable to knead your ass and pull you closer, if that was even possible.

You separate from him, raising on your knees. Jungkook whines in protest, hips buckling up from the mattress to try to meet yours again.

"Jungkook, I'm serious, stay still!" 

"I take it back." his voice shaky and hands straining against the tight hold the scarf you tied around has on them. "I don't like this. Untie me so I can fuck you, babe." he complains. You sit on his tiny waist, your thighs trying to stop his movements. 

You take a moment to assess him. He looks too beautiful for his own good: hair courtaning his forehead, biceps bulging and abs flexing. You can't see his eyes but you know they might be glassy. You bite your lip to supress a whine of delight. You almost consider doing as he says. Almost. 

But you mantain your ground. Your jealousy from the other night had been crawling slowly from within these past few days and since you couldn't take it out on Jungkook any other way because he really wasn't to blame, you figured you'd try something new to punish him and let some of your supressed anger vanish. 

Twisting your body back to pull down his boxers, not all the way, just enough to have his cock springing free from the confines of the fabric and slapping against your asscheeks.

"Has toxic masculinity seriously polluted your brain so much you can't take this seriously?" you fall forward, one of your hands balancing you beside his head as the other wraps around his neck, a tentative hold not yet to constrict his breathing. 

He gulps, his body's tense and his Adam's apple is prominent under your touch. All he can see is black but he'd do anything to watch your pretty tits bouncing in front of his face. "I don't like this conversation either." he pouts.

"Then why are you so hard?" you grin, holding yourself back from laughing as he hesitates for an answer. You lean closer, mouth against his ear as you whisper. "I'm so wet right now, I could take you just like this. No lubrication at all and my pussy would just swallow your dick." Feeling his girth still between your ass flutter, clearly affected by the sultry tone of your voice. You remove your hand from his neck seeing as he has stopped moving obediently. Reaching back, you slide your panties to the side and align your entrance to the head of his leaking cock. 

"Fuck, baby, please~" Jungkook's pleads fills the air, hips desperately back in motion and sliding just a few inches inside your drenched heat. The warmth envoles him instantly, your pussy pulsates around him and neither of you can't help the in synch groans tearing from your throats. 

"Just the tip" you lick your lips, your voice betraying you as you resist the urge to glide the rest of his lenght inside your quivering core.

"Just the tip, my ass." 

Out of sudden, Jungkook is swiftly lifting his hips from the matress, sinking all the way in. You cry as your body jumps forward, face hidden in the juncture of Jungkook's sweaty neck. His thick cock stretches you out as nice and deep and perfectly as he always does. You mewl. This was not supossed to happen at all.  

"See? This is what you really wanted." you can hear the chuckle threatening to spill from his lips, anger starting to boil inside of you again. 

Regaining a little bit of your lost control, you lift yourself on your trembling knees and sit back again, the tip of his dick hitting your cervix. You groan in unision, placing your hands on the hard planes of his chest and steadying yourself to try to reclaim your dominance. Finding it troublesome, because Jungook is set on having it his own way, his thrusts meeting yours in perfect synch.

You really shouldn't feel your climax approaching so soon but somehow battling for control while bickering with Jungkook is about to send you over the edge and that's making you even more annoyed.

"I swear to God, Jungkook. If you don't stop moving and shut the fuck up..." your murmur through gritted teeth, jaw slackened and eyes fluttering shut.  

"What?" he spats, breathing rugged and voice coarse. "If I don't shut up, you'll wha-"

The sound of a sharp smack echoes inside your room and Jungkook's movements freeze on the spot. His head is turned to the side from the impact, and a faint print of your fingers is adorning his  already stinging cheek. None of you mutter anything for a few seconds, until concerned words start to rush out of you.

"Ohmygod, Jungkook, I-"

"Did you just slap me?" Jungkook is unmoving, his mouth agape and you can picture the incredulous expression his eyes might be oozing. "Baby, what the fuck?!" You're mortified. Your hands cover your mouth and your eyes, wide open, stare down at him although he can't stare at you back.

"Babe, I don't know why I did that, you wouldn't stop talking and I know that's not an excuse but it-" 

"It was fucking hot." a breathy laugh in disbelief leaves his chest. Your forehead creases, hands falling down to your chest to try to steady your incessant heartbeat. His tongue darts between his pearly teeth, a smug smirk on his features. An eyebrow of yours raises as you size him up, the realization that his body is completely motionless now hitting you.

Lurging forward, you pinch his jaw between your fingers, your hips carry on their grinding on their own accord. He releases a raspy moan, your walls clenching around him as another hit strikes his cheek, softer this time. 

"You gonna be good to me?" you mutter against his lips. He nods slowly, his mouth salivating as your hips swirl on top of him. He blindly tries to reattach his mouth to yours, but you dodge him, going for the skin of his clavicle instead. "Can I fuck you slow like this until you're filling me with your cum?" He squirms when he feels you sucking a pretty purple bruise on his flesh, your cunt dropping all the way down his cock, leisurly grinding against his pelvic bone, looking yourself to find some relief to your clit. 

"Ah!" his head tilts back, back slighlt arching as you soothe the mark on his neck with your tongue. "That m-might be s-sooner than you think, babe" he admits timorously, swallowing the lump in his throat, the veins on his neck on full display. 

You sigh in content because, thankfully your orgasm is also closer than he thinks it is. "M-me too-" you gasp, your face buried on his shoulder, letting your fingers brush his ebony hair, nails gently scrapping his scalp as you keep the tortuous movements of your hips against his, his girth hitting that spot just right everytime until you feel the knot in your tummy finally snapping. "C-cum, J-Jungkook, I-m-"

Jungkook doesn't need to be told twice because he has been holding back from it for a while now, not really willing to admit he was enjoying this as much as he was. With a thrust of his own fused with the way your pussy is tightening around him it's enough to send him over the edge, an unpredicted cry emanating from his vocal chords harmonizing with your own, his whole body tensing as your walls milk every single drop of his cum. 

For several minutes you stay just like that. Jungkook's hands still tied, blindfold still on, his mouth still agape as his chest rises and falls until his breathing becomes steady again. And you, on top, your fingers tangled in his dark locks, your breath fanning against his neck and his release dripping down your thighs. You stay like that until your body starts shaking with uncontrollable laughter. 

Jungkook tilts his head towards yours, eyebrows furrowing and eyes still covered.

"What was that noise?" you manage through your giggle fit. "'Aaah!'" You've never made a noise like that before, I can't- it was so funn-"

Even while still being strained and blindfolded and with you making fun of him, a loopsided goofy smirk starts making an appearence on Jungkook's features. 

Fancy dinner parties were never your thing. 

Wearing heels that were too high -specifically to try to match Jungkook's height-, a new expensive dress that you were surely going to return as soon as the event was over because you definitely could not afford it and socializing with Jungkook's clique was definitely not the way you envisioned your Saturday night going. 

At least Jungkook had barely been able to keep his hands for himself at the sight of you wrapped in emerald green silk and lace. But even that couldn't make you feel less uncomfortable and out of place. 

Yugyeom, one of Jungkook's friends, had definitely more money than your boyfriend had previously let you know. Apparently, being a 'lil rich' as Jungkook had mentioned meant booking a luxurious restaurant to hold a dinner party with at least fifty people who looked just as 'lil rich' as Yugyeom's Gucci tuxedo.  

'It'll be alright babe. Yugyeom always insists on celebrating his birthday like it's an Oscar after party. We'll just eat some of that disgusting caviar and then head home to watch Netflix, I swear'. 

And yes, caviar was gross, but so was the fact that Jungkook had failed to mention a certain someone would also be making an appearence. 

After introducing you to a few of his friends and realizing that Mingyu's frendliness and amiability helped you feel more relaxed, he had excused himself to the bathroom, leaving you and his friend to entangle in a heated conversation about How I Met Your Mother's finale season. 

You were thankful for Mingyu's humble nature and easygoing talk for a few minutes until you finally spotted your boyfriend making his way back into the room, stopping in his tracks to acknowledge a group of friends from his class. 

Again, you wouldn't have such a problem with a certain blonde if she would just stop looking at Jungkook with stars in her eyes and pressing her cleavage against him while playing with her hair. It was hard to keep track of your conversation with Mingyu while Eunha was standing right next to your boyfriend and seemingly ogling up at him. It was also hard to not let your mind waver to dangerous territory when you took notice of how disgustingly good they looked together. 

Just two attractive people who would look disgustingly good together. 

Mingyu's voice makes you turn back to him. 

"...I don't know, like, Barney was a womanizer until Robin, you know? He changed for her! They were just perfect for each other, but they had to throw it all away by killing the mother and then making Robin marry Ted? And Barney going back to his old ways?" Mingyu sounds exhasperated and you would laugh and find it cute if your stomach wasn't tugging again in a way that made you regret drinking so much wine so fast. Specially after his last statement.  

"That's what I'm saying." you mumble, turning your attention back to your boyfriend in the crowd.

Jungkook wouldn't go back to his old ways. He loves you. There's nothing to worry about.

But as you watch him start to make his way towards you, you also watch the way Eunha grabs the sleeve of his blazer to pull him back. She leans in, whispers something in his ear to which he just shakes his head, says something that it's impossible to decipher from here you're standing and simply walks in your direction. 

Still, as much as you tried to be neutral and objective and not a 'jealous little bitch', it's almost impossible to hide the sour expression on your face. It's impossible to unclench your jaw throughout the entire evening or lose the too tight grip on your glass of wine. Even when Jungkook whispers in your ear if you're okay, you merely nod yes. You avoid eye contact with him and everytime he tries to slip your hand into his, you dodge him it by wrapping your arms around yourself, claiming how cold it is.

Jungkook is not dumb. 

He know something's up but he's also not stupid enough to cause a scene in public or preassure you into talking. So he settles on wating and being patient. Even as he slips his jacket on your stiff shoulders with pouty lips and his eyebrows drawn together, all he does is press a small kiss to the back of your neck. It takes all power within you to not throw yourself in his arms. 

But as midnight approaches and it's time to leave, you notice a change in Jungkook's behaviour as you say your goodbyes. His hand on your back is not just a soft caress, instead, his fingers pull you closer, dig into your skin as he drags the both of you to where his car is parked. Now it's him who avoids your gaze. His tensed jaw and his tongue pressing against the inside of his cheek is a visible indicator that Jungkook is pissed. 

You know his body language as well as he knows yours. And now, as he opens the door of the passanger seat so you can slide in, the guilt and the remorse of acting cold towards him for hours is finally dawning on you. 

"Are you going to tell me now what was that about?" when he closes his own door shut, he doesn't bother to put his seatbelt on. Just grips the steering wheel as he turns to you. 

"I-I don't know what you're t-"

"You don't know what I'm talking about?" he laughs, not a bit of humour in it. "I know scenes like this make you feel uncomfortable but I actually thought everything was going fine. I leave you for five minutes with Mingyu and when I come back, you won't look at me, won't touch me, won't act like I'm your boyfriend. Like I did something wrong. So please, _____, tell me, what's going on?"

You know there's no excuse for the way you acted. You know it's not Jungkook's fault he attracts attention and it most definitely not his fault if an ex of his is still hung up on him. You know it's your own fault and you know you should not try to excuse yourself and fight back. You'd swore to yourself you'd push down any feelings of jealousy deep inside until they disappeared. But something about tonight makes you explode.

"Why was she being all over you?"

Jungkook's face twists in confusion. "What? Who?"

"Eunha! Who the fuck else? She was all over you a few weeks ago at Minghao's party, and she was all over you tonight!" your voice is louder than you would've liked but at this point all you care about is letting it all out.

"This is what all of that was about? Eunha?"

"Yes! I've seen her on campus as well! Always trying to get your attention! I don't care that you have friends in common, but specially tonight, she whispered something to you and she was looking at you like she-"

"Who cares how she looks at me? All you need to care about is how I look at you because the only thing I care about is how you look at me!" Jungkook exclaims, clearly exhausted of this conversation. 

You sink in your seat and look away as the knuckles on his hands turn white from gripping the steering wheel. 

"_____," he calls you gently,  but his voice mantains a stern tone to it. "We don't do jealousy. I thought we were supossed to trust each other blindly. Have I not proved to you how sickenly in love with you I am? Do you not trust me and what I feel?"

"I-... Of course I do. I-just... I don't know. You're right. That was uncalled for." you wrap yourself in the warmth of Junkook's blazer, trying to make his scent wash away any ugly resentment and guilt in your body. 

"Wanna know what she said to me?" a rethorical question, because he was going to tell you anyway. "She asked me if I was going to stay for Yugyeom's after party, way past midnight. Wanna know what I said?" he turns to you. "I said no, I'm spending the night with my girlfriend."

None of you say nothing after that. He just puts his seatbelt on and starts driving. It's not too much of a far drive to his dorm, but the silence and the awkwardness makes it feel so much longer than it should be. You don't remember the last time Jungkook was mad at you. Actually, you don't think Jungkook has ever been mad at you. He loved the banter, loved to tease you, loved being competitive with you. But you had never seen him being avoidant of you. And that feeling tears your heart on the seat of his car.

"Are you mad at me?" you ask, voice barely audible, when the car stops at a red light. His dark eyes meet yours, his face immediately softening as he studies your expression. Then he picks one of your small hands in one of his big ones, brings it to his lips and lightly kisses your knuckles. He communicates with his eyes what he doesn't with words and it's enough to make you feel secure, at least for now.

When you finally arrive at Jungkook's room, he holds the door ope for you and lets you walk in, but he's still unusually quiet. So much so, you start to worry you might have fucked up big time. 

You stand there, not knowing what to do as you watch him sit down on his bed, slipping his shoes and socks off and loosening the tie around his neck. His hair, that was perfectly styled a few hours ago, is now messy by the amount of times his hand has pushed it back. He looks too yummy, and you hate the fact that tension and a little bit of fighting has managed to make him look as delectable. 

You ignore the heat starting to form in your belly because now it's not the time to be horny. Not when you still need to apologize and make things right. He's rolling  the sleeves of his black shirt down his forearms when you decide to speak. 

"Jungkook, I'm very sorry." you start, as you remove his blazer off you and place it on the chair right in front of his desk. "I don't know why I acted the way I did. I dont get easily jealous and I really don't think I am but..." your throat constricts your words for a moment. "The more I love you, the more frightened I get when I think that one day you'll realize I'm better off as your best friend's little sister. I-I dont know what I'd do with myself if that ever happene-"

"Take off your dress." Jungkook's impassive voice and emotionless face startles you and you freeze on your feet. 

"What?"

"Did I stutter?"

His elbows rest on his knees and he's holding your stare with his. His doe eyes lack that free spirited and amusing glint they usually have. He looks bored, scrutinizing you. He's not challenging you. He's commanding you because he knows you will obligue. 

That's why you gulp and slowly slide the straps of your dress down your arms until the fabric pools at your feet. His eyes waver along your naked breasts, nipples perking up like the mere intensity of his gaze is ordering them to. He doesn't make a move and doesn't say anything for a few seconds. He doesn't compliment you like he normally would at the sight of you almost naked in front of him.

His lack of words make you feel insecure, regardless of how turned on you are. You're used to Jungkook being reassuring, you're used to his lighthearted jokes and his playful kisses in the bedroom. But you're not used to Jungkook telling you what to do and keeping his distance while doing so. Your arms move on their own to hide yourself.

"Don't. If you hide from me, I swear to God, _____." he watches you as you let your arms fall back to your sides, your chest moving up and down while you struggle to breathe. You can't deny Jungkook's gruff voice and his eyes studying every bit of skin available to him like he hasn't seen you naked before is not making your underwear stick to your lower lips. 

"JK, I just don't think this is the right moment to-"

"On my lap." your heart skips a bit, a thrill of excitement coursing through your veins.

"Jungkook-"

"I said, get on my lap, face down." he says again, this time slower. One of his eyebrows quirk up. "Or would you rather me drag you myself? Or make you crawl?"

Your eyes widen, and your feet are quick to approach him. Your nipples tingle, your core is throbbing and your cheeks are adorned by a beautiful blush that Jungkook doesn't miss. 

He doesn't move until you're in front of him, just to help you lower yourself on his lap, your cheek and your nipples touching the mattress and your ass up. You close your eyes when Jungkook skims his fingertips over your skin, his carressing relaxing your body until he eases your nerves a bit. He sighs when he notices the way that poor excuse of a thong sticks between your folds as his strong hands massage your buttcheeks. 

He's taking his time, his fingers gliding over your soft skin, his breathing too calm for your liking. Until one palm of his hand collides sharply against your right cheek, sending your body forward. You gasp, the stinging making your body want to pull away. But he's quick to catch both your wrists behind your back, keeping you in place. 

"Jungk-!"

Another smack, this time harder, on the same cheek. 

"Did I give you permission to talk?"  

Smack. This time on the left cheek. Your back arches on its own will, presenting more of your ass to him unwittingly. Your eyes squeezed shut and bite the inside of your cheek as you rub your thighs together. You keep quiet as his hand lands another blow on your ass. 

"That's a good girl. Now," his voice is gentler this time as his hand soothe your reddened cheeks. "do you think what you did tonight was okay?" you say nothing, only a mewl slips past your lips. Another smack. "Answer me."

"No." you lick your lips, anticipating more. 

"Do you think it was funny to pull a stunt like that?" 

Smack.

"N-no!"

"No, it wasn't. Spread your legs for me." you do as you're told and he finally pulls down the drenched piece of lace down your thighs. He leans forward, spreads your cheeks with one hand as he lets a glob of spit fall directly into your lips. He makes you gasp when his fingers start sliding up and down your folds slowly. 

"I've had to put up with this kind of behavour since the day you begged me to fuck this tight, virgin pussy like the little slut you are." you whine, face red as humiliation starts to creep in. Jungkook slips one finger in, pumping it slow and easy. Your hips move to take him deeper.

"I tried to be a gentleman, you know?" he says, adding a second finger. "I've tried to treat you nice and sweet and be the best boyfriend I could be to make you happy and keep you satisfied in every sense of the word." his thumb finds your clit, rubbing tortuous circles. 

"Been compeletely whipped since I kissed you for the first time. Haven't looked at other girls because I just can't when I have everything I want to look at right in front of me." murmuring, he starts to get lost your pussy and how it swallows his fingers and how obscene you look and sound, dripping right on his trousers. He watches his fingers moving in and out, almost hypnotized. "Yet, somehow..." he pulls away. You whimper in protest. 

"Somehow, you still seem to doubt me." His hand smacks your cheek again, wet fingers spreading your essence all over your skin.

"P-please, please." you cry. You miss Jungkook's sadistic smile before he releases the grip on your wrists, still keeping you on his lap. Both his hands spread your cheeks now, and another glob of spit falls right into your asshole. His fingers find your cunt again, easily taking you almost over the edge.

"If you could only look at yourself right now... All spread out for me like a needy whore in heat" his thumb teases your unexplored rim, hesitantly, coating it with his spit and your own arousal. He presses in slowly. You gasp, your body tenses and Jungkook stills his movements immediately. There's silence for a few seconds. 

"Too far? Should I stop?" and there's your Jungkook, concern lacing his voice. His free hand caresses your back, your body relaxing, laying back down obediently. His fingers are still inside you and his thumb is still asking for entrance. He leans forward, placing a small but comforting kiss on the bruised skin of your right asscheek. 

"Go on." you whisper, but he doesn't move right away. This time, it's his own body that tenses momentarely before going back to his tranquil demeanor. He breathes through his noise as his fingers pick up where they left off. 

"Yeah?" you swear you hear him swallow a lump in his throat. "Gonna let me finger this tight little ass like a good slut? Mm?" his thumb slides deeper, slightly stretching you out while his fingers work your pussy in a solid rhythm. "Gonna let me stretch you out little by little until I can open you up with my cock one day?" his movements speed up, fingers sliding out of your cunt to play with your clit and his thumb slowly moving in and out. "You don't wanna talk now? You just want to stay silent while I fuck your ass and-"

And then you're cumming, so unexpected it takes both of you by surprise. Your hands grip onto Jungkook's sheets, your thighs clasp around his hand as you scream his name. He doesn't stop though. He rides you through it, encouraging words mixing with filthy insults that prolong your orgasm until you're squirming beneath him. 

"Shit, baby... My hand is soaked." he mumbles, as he slowly removes his fingers and thumb from you. "You okay?"

You faintly nod your head yes, not able to find words through your dry mouth and your pussy still convulsing. 

"Good. Get on the bed. On your hands and knees." 

You somehow manage to slip from his lap and position yourself as he says. Except your arms and legs are shaking. Although the sound of Jungkook undoing his belt and his hands gripping your hips and bringing you towards him until the head of his dick is at your entrance is enough to make you forget about how tired your body is. You surrender to him, not even bothering to hold yourself up on your arms, your fingers crumbling the sheets and your face buried into the pillow. 

When his cock enters you, a pitiful moan leaves your mouth. His thick lenght slides into your heat, filling you perfectly as he always does. It's a wonder how well he fits inside you. 

"Such a perfect slut for me. Always ready for me to do whatever I want with her, since day one. So tight, so ready. So, so perfect. All mine." he talks as measured as he moves, dragging each word out as his hips find a nice tempo. 

Then he doesn't move for a while with his dick buried between your walls, and you know he's holding himself back. You turn your head slightly to look at him. He catches your eyes instantly. Sees your mascara running down your watery eyes, and your smudged lipstick and your messy hair and then he's giving you that look. That look that lets you know that Jungkook is, indeed, whipped for you. Leaning in, he presses his shirt-covered chest to your sweaty, naked back. His cock dives deeper, not an ounce of space between you as he lovingly kisses your cheek until his mouth finds yours. 

He kisses you hard but soft, tongue meeting yours for the first time since you entered the room. Jungkook is not a man of words. He's silly, and a jokester, and finds it difficult to express how he's feeling. But when he kisses you, or looks at you, when he touches you, or when he makes love to you, even if it's as dirty and filthy as right now, he's always able to transmit exactly what he can't vocally.

He's telling you there's no other place he'd rather be than here, with you. 

When he pulls back, a string of saliva still connecting your lips, his hand moves to the back of your head, fisting your hair in a tight hold that makes you arch your back and desperately moan for him.

"A-and you're mine." you sob.

It's like something snaps inside of him. He growls and suddenly his hips lose control. He nails you against the mattress, his grip on your hair pulling your head back, his lips against your ear as your cunt clenches around his cock. 

"Just yours. All yours." his grunts send shivers down your spine and you're close again, even in the painful and uncomfortable position your body is in. Being at Jungkook's mercy and him being at yours is enough to have you seeing starts.

"This is the only pussy I want wrapped around my cock. Your lips are the only ones I want to kiss. You're the only one I want between my arms." It only takes two flickers of Jungkook's free hand against your nub and his next words to tip you over. "You belong to me, and I belong to you."

You squeal as you come, and Jungkook bites your shoulder to keep himself from doing so as well as he follows shortly. He fills you up with his release,  but he doesn't release you from him. He wraps his arms around your frame, both your bodies becoming soft as he rolls over to one side with your back still pressed to his chest, cock still inside you. His lips find their way to the skin of your shoulder and the back of your neck. His breath fanning your flesh makes you smile.

"That is so not like my sister. I'm telling you, she never gets jealous." Taehyung says over the phone. He's munching on something again and Jungkook would bet all the money in his wallet again he's eating Skittles. Red Skittles. "So, everything cool now?"

"Yeah, man. We just talked it out, you know?" Jungkook's gaze falls on you, laying on your stomach on his bed, laptop iluminating your face, earbuds on and your head moving to whatever music you're listening to. Jungkook would bet all the money in his bank account it's Shape Of My Heart by The Backstreet Boys. Or at least that's what he's been able to guess so far. He was never good at reading lips, specially when trying to guess boybands' lyrics. 

Friday's nights meant late 1990's/early 2000's pop nostalgia for you. It meant shaking his head and spending the following week trying to get Britney and Xtina songs out of his brain for him. Although lately, he hadn't been trying that hard. Jungkook sighs in content, not really trying to cover the fact that he might be looking at you like a starstruck teenager. Which, it was totally fair because that's exactly how he feels about you. "Communication is key, bro."

He keeps watching you until your head perks up and catch him gawking. You smile at him and he smiles back.

"By 'communication is key' you mean you actually fucked my little sister silly right? Bro, I swear, I'll block your numb-"

"Sorry man, gotta go." 

"And now you're gonna fuck her silly again, right? You son of a b-"

Jungkook hangs up just as you take your earbuds off, making his way to you to kiss you silly.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hello Miss Raven! Happy one year to you and your blog! May I request some wedding headcanons with Azul and Jamil with a fem reader please? Thank you! 🧡

I also wrote these Azul x merperson S/O wedding headcanons if you’d like to read those~

***Mild spoilers for the Scalding Sands Fireworks event!***

I do.

The venue is to be on the beach, where the shore and the sea meet. It’ll be hot, so you take care to order tents to keep seating cool, and warn the guests to come in appropriate footwear. (You opt to go for strappy sandals yourself to make it easier to walk around in your wedding attire.)

Speaking of guests, there’s a mix of humans and nonhumans, namely merfolk, at the ceremony. Whereas the human guests happily wander on the golden sands, the merfolk guests splash around in the water. It’s a union of land and sea, a reflection of your perfect partnership with Azul.

Just because the wedding is outside doesn’t mean it can’t still be classy! The décor is mostly white, with lavender accents, pearl beading, and water lilies and colorful coral centerpieces. (Azul spent a long time meticulously combing through wedding catalogues to find the ideal silverware to pair with your decorations!)

There’s a large variety of food at the wedding, but of course, your husband-to-be makes a beeline for the fried stuff. It’s a special day, so he figures why not indulge? You join him to feast, offering to hand feed him a piece of fried chicken or a bit of cake every so often--which Azul graciously accepts with a bit of a blush.

You were originally going to hire an orchestra, but Idia ends up being all the music you need. (”He’s free and convenient,” as Azul had described him. “Not to mention he owes me, and the time has come to collect.”) With DJ Shroud running the dance floor, there’s a mix of classic and modern music sure to satisfy guests from all walks of life.

The weather’s so nice on your special day, so you take advantage of that for pictures! You can walk along the shoreline and perch on the pier, or even leave messages in the sand with sticks or your own feet and hands. Azul’s very shy and hesitant about having his picture taken at first, so it takes some encouragement on your end before he becomes more comfortable around the lens. As long as he’s focusing on you, he’s never nervous, and his smile doesn’t fade.

When the time comes to toss your wedding bouquet, you and Azul instead write your vows out on slips of paper, then place them in a bottle and cork it. The message in a bottle is set into the sea, with the hope of one day blessing its discoverer with true love.

The ceremony concludes with you and Azul riding off into the sunset on a lavishly decorated ship. Your guests see you off with smiles and waves--and with the smashing of a champagne bottle against the vessel (the twins’ idea, not yours or Azul’s) your voyage to newlywed life begins. 

The wedding is to held in the heart of Silk City, in Asim Park. Of course, you’ve got Kalim’s full support and financial backing for the event! He’s so excited to attend his best friend’s wedding that he waives the entire rental fee for the venue for you. (Yay, money saved to go toward an extravagant honeymoon vacation!)

Being the worrywart and the overachiever that he is, Jamil originally attempts to arrange the entire wedding by himself. He’s used to this work thanks to Kalim’s constant parties, but it soon becomes apparent that a wedding is too big for even Jamil to handle alone. You intervene to remind your husband-to-be that this should be a team effort. Then, and only then, does he finally relent and invite you to assist.

The wedding pays homage to the customs of the Scalding Sands, with an extravagant twist (thanks to funding from Kalim). There are traditional instruments and foods, plus swathes of fabric and jeweled decorations abound. Your garb is just as bejeweled and flowy, with a sparkling headdress, fine slippers, and jewelry hanging off of your neck and limbs.

Jamil is obligated to invite Kalim and appoint him as the best man and ring bearer (much to his own chagrin). Kalim ends up crying while giving a speech about his friend, which makes Jamil want to disappear into the ground. Meanwhile, Najma is one of the bridesmaids, and excitedly helps you do your hair and makeup for the ceremony. (By comparison, she and Jamil bicker as they’re preparing.)

The centerpieces feature jasmine and desert roses--though Asim Park boasts so many flowers that the entire wedding smells lovely anyway. While you’re going around and greeting guests, Jamil picks a jasmine flower and tucks it behind one ear. “As pure and as graceful as you are,” he murmurs, a sly smile on his lips.

Most of the guests are standing or walking around the park. Kids enjoy running their hands around or playing near the peacock fountain, while the older folk like admiring the plants. But most importantly, people love tearing up the big dance floor! Jamil joins in himself, putting on a stellar break dancing performance in spite of his suit. It’s rare to see him so loose, so free--it puts a smile on your face. He catches you staring and grins, tugging you by the wrist to join him in the next dance.

Instead of doves, parrots are released into the sky. You and Jamil open up their cages and set them free together--and as the parrots escape and fly away, you watch them, hand in hand, wishing them the same happiness as what you’re experiencing today.

As the night draws to a close, you and your new husband board a magic carpet. You still hear Kalim sobbing happily as you take off-- Fireworks light up the sky as you delve into the diamond-dusted evening, promising a bright and colorful future for you both.

[stardustincarnate]

Dating L Lawliet Would Include :

— chances of him getting a partner is less likely than light getting rid of his god-complex

— but hey, that's not completely 0%, and that doesn't mean he finds any difficulty in asking you to be his when he finds you quite intriguing

— though since he's new to it he finds the feeling very odd.. you know all that mushy mushy stuff called love inside him—

— in fact it's YOU who's having some difficulties

— why wouldn't you be, after being asked to solve a bunch of codes you didn't even know existed, and then asked to solve a couple more of mathematical equations, and then asked to string your answers all together so that you could arrive at one FINAL answer which translates to "be mine"

— spoiler, you gave up solving them (because who wouldn't) leaving L no choice but to ask you directly

— it'll come abrupt. for instance while you jotting something on your keyboard he'll turned around, chewing on his cake and casually saying

— " do you wanna be my girlfriend? "

— " pardon, what? "

— " i asked if you want to be my girlfriend. "

— you're gonna have a hard time picking your jaw up from the floor after hearing that

— congratulations for getting emo sherlock for a boyfriend

— i hope he doesn't die—

— he's not the most affectionate boyfriend out there. even before you got into a relationship you could clearly see how he avoided any physical contact as much as he could

— doesn't relish the idea of being held and will rarely let you. it'll only become more often when the relationship progresses

— rarely holds you, but when he does, he's holding you as if you're something fragile—quite loosely. he's careful lest he accidentally hurts you physically

— ruffling your hair and nimbly flicking your forehead is sort of like his love language

— while he may not look like it and doesn't really show it at first, he flirts better than anyone you know

— it only happens once in a blue moon but you will never forget the things he says

— he's not the best at comforting people and he's quite prone to saying some things that are harsh and offending

— but he'll make it up the next day by entertaining you with his top-tier dry humor

— and who doesn't love that

— he may even share a bit of his snacks with you

— which he rarely does because even though he loves you his snacks are HIS

— he's also prone to saying suggestive.. stuffs

— of course, they're only words

— unless . . . ; )

— well, that will come at the later part of your relationship so none of that for now

— he's okay with walking with you side by side but prefers it more if he's walking behind you, that way he can look after you

— need i mention that he's really REALLY good at explaining stuffs

— it makes you gape in awe honestly

— smart is the new sexy

— though sometimes, since he's really REALLY smart, you fail to understand and catch up with him

— and unfortunately he will not repeat

— " weren't you listening? "

— you do not want to disturb him while he's working and completely absorbed with a case

— he. will. roast. you. alive.

— THIS MAN IS ALSO THE BIGGEST HYPOCRITE OUT THERE

— telling you to sleep early because he's worried your brain might not function properly the next day

— HAHAHA WOW

— LOOK WHO'S TALKING

— with the amount of daily sugar and the very teeny amount of sleep he gets you wonder how's he still alive and not only that he's also so much stronger than he looks???? HOW—

— when he sleeps he'll still notice if there's a presence beside him and he'll wake up. we obviously don't want that. so if you want to take a look of his sleeping figure you'll have to be very very careful

— you think you've won, silently giggling, but when you look at him again he's looking at you with an unimpressed look on his face and then you rush out of the room

— meanwhile, if you're the one sleeping, he'll gently come over you and sit on the edge of the bed (or just stand looming at your figure if you're on a couch or elsewhere)

— he'll stoop and put a blanket over you if he feels it's too cold for you and arrange your pillows if they'd become a mess

— will caress your hair so softly his fingers barely skim over it

— will then fondle your cheeks and stare at you lovingly for about five minutes

— pretends none of that ever happened when you wake up

— if you started dating way before the kira case he'd tell you not to involve yourself in said case

— and by telling you that he has done the worst thing he could possibly do to you

— " i never truly loved you if you're asking me to be honest. i only asked you to be mine because you were the only person around at that time. if i were surrounded by a throng, i certainly wouldn't have picked you amongst them. "

— he'd be lying if he said it's not painful to say those words to you. even his facade keeps on faltering

— but what else can he do? he'd rather risk changing your perspective about him by pelting you with words that stab like a knife than risk having you killed by kira once you've associated yourself with the case. says it's alright having you hate him as long as you don't die

— all in all, he's leaning towards the tsundere side. may seem a bit cold as a boyfriend but can be hilarious and flirty if he wants to. actually caring on the inside but chooses the worse words when it comes to certain situations. has his own little, very subtle ways of showing that he loves you <3