#I love being a dumbass

[mayzdayerz]

Change of plans

I wanna dress up as them for Halloween but I’m too much of a pussy 💀💀💀

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

Eldritch/not-entirely-human Grunkle Stan stories have been eating away at my brain, so I have a silly little concept of Mimic!Stan.

He and his Mystery Shack are both mimics that lure tourists in as a literal "tourist trap" to gather and devour them! Since the house is alive, it raises a few (read: several) child safety concerns that lead to a LOT of rules to be created for Dipper and Mabel to follow when they eventually arrive, such as:

Be careful not to get lost in the winding hallways! The Mystery Shack is bigger on the inside, and you don't want to end up in the wrong areas.

Don't go through randomly appearing doors, they may eat you.

If you think you feel the walls around you breathing and the floor beneath you shifting, no, you don't.

If you think the walls feel a bit damp, you're imagining it.

Watch your fingers around windowsills! You wouldn't want to lose any of them.

Don't linger too long under the doorframes; it may start feeling like they are slowly constricting around you.

[shootingstarrfish]

a family who loves you

[caffess]

Rip to the only reasonable Targaryen and her poor dragon

[sodamnbored]

Leo: *frantically rubbing himself down with balloons*

Nico: What on earth are you doing?

Leo: I’m about to try asking Jason out.

Nico, sarcastically: Sure, that explains everything.

Leo, impatiently: I need it to go well. Look at that face. He must have people hitting on him all the time, so I need a way to stand out.

Leo, grinning: So I’m going to use static electricity to create an electric shock when I casually touch him, so sparks will literally fly when I ask him out.

Nico, amused: Okay, well have fun tricking Jason into falling in love with you.

[sunnythedawg]

Happy halloween!!!

[disheveledtranquility]

"Wow...I know how much you hate musicals."

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i have a Scene - a Plot if you will - that backs this as context. y'all are gonna have to trust me on this one <3 or read the tags...

[crazymizusmoocher]

Just saw this pic on Pinterest and thought that mizu and taigen might seem cool in there, I M U S T M A K E M O R E

Don’t mind taigen’s fingers, this was SO rushed 😭

[bluerosefox]

Dinner?

Feeling a bit Spirit Halloweenish.

Danny blinked, stared blankly, blinked again before slowly very slowly closed his front door.

A few seconds later Danny opened the door again and once again meet a certain tallish young man, around his age if maybe a few years older, in front of him...

Who was it?

Bruce Wayne....

Bruce freaking Wayne, someone according to what he heard from Sam telling him from what she heard from her parents had apparently just dropped out of med school and was 'in the wind' according to rich elite gossip talks, was at his front door.

........

Why?

Wait... Did he just ask Danny out on a date?

-x-x-

Bruce Wayne has just dropped out of med school and is beginning his training into becoming the person his city needs him to become. While looking into where he can he remembers how in his teen years the planet was almost destroyed but was saved by a ghost teen hero and looks into it. He digs deep to uncover what happened, uncovering impressive firewalls Amity Park has, etc and finds out about Danny Fenton/Phantom.

He decides to go visit the younger man, who is just about to start college himself, and ask a few questions.

He uhhh... Bruce just wasn't expecting to find Danny very cute (even though he was pretty certain Phantom had been his first male crush when he saw a photo of the teen years ago), and adorable with his owlish stare, and well the first words out of his mouth was

"Would you mind joining me for dinner?"

-x-x-

[essektheylyss]

I'm also still laughing that he really showed up, introduced himself as an Archivist of the Cobalt Soul, and then insinuated that they were going to go extrajudicially hunt down, capture, and "interrogate" a Cerberus Assembly Archmage. Sir, archivists do not do that kind of thing, least of all on their own, LEAST OF ALL with a bunch of random hooligans they were just sent to collect for an unrelated excursion. Quite honestly, that was the thing I kept going back to in evidence of, there is absolutely no way this is a legit archivist.

[sillygoofyqueer]

oh my god i love seeing wei qingqwei content in the tags hes so funny. anyways i personally believe hes one of the few peak lords who refuses to let shen jiu's jabs get to him and keeps trying to tell him his bad puns and it makes shen jiu SO mad

Everyone else whispering and spreading rumours about what Shen Jiu does with his time, and then you see Wei Qingwei carefully scribbling down a list of jokes that he's going to send with a letter about the next sword choosing ceremonies to Shen Jiu; this man WILL succumb and become his didi. Yue Qingyuan seemed to have awkward history with the man, but WEI QINGWEI doesn't. I like to think Shen Jiu receives these shitty jokes, reading through them with the upmost straight face because the messenger from Wan Jian Peak is still hovering around and will report back to Wei Qingwei if Shen Jiu's lips so much as twitch. Then he calmly, slowly writes a single note for the messenger to take back - "your puns suck. Do better." While most people would take this as an insult, Wei Qingwei sees this as nothing but a challenge - it's the longest he's spent away from the forge, coming up with the best puns possible and putting them on the xianxia equivalent of flashcards, meaning that Shen Jiu will have to read the puns one by one, flipping each one over to read the punchline. He does not stop, will NOT stop until he gets his shixiong to laugh. It's a matter of principle NOT to laugh, Shen Jiu thinks - as though he isn't sort of, kinda, pleased that someone is putting in such a sincere effort to make him grin. Not get angry or snap or become embarrassed. Wei Qingwei wants him to laugh. There isn't even any ulterior motives of guilt as there is with Yue Qingyuan. (This is the reason we don't hear much about Wei Qingwei in canon - Shen Jiu has no fight with his existence (provided he keep up with the puns) /j/j)

[lostonmyroad]

the orv dokja moment where he’s like “i see i’m so galaxy brain yjh is acting devastated over my death is to get coins from the constellations and not because he actually cares for me i’m so genius” is the most iconic moment in literature ever to me

dokja thinks he’s being so fucking smart he’s overanalzyed this to the point of looping back to being a fucking dumbass

im pretty sure it has legendary status in the fandom

[casually-eat-my-soul]

Derek asks to win a bet, nothing more, nothing less. His own curiosity was secondary. So he asks, as his eyes bore down into Stiles.

“So, what is your favourite colour then?”

Stiles’ breath hitches before he answers. “Green”

Derek contemplates, confused, as he had heard Stiles answer the same question two night ago. He could have sworn Stiles had said red.

[fatedroses]

Two former military elites taking merc jobs perform absolutely hellish battle tactics together.

[thesmokinpossum]

If My Body Could Speak, Blythe Baird | The Godfather, Mario Puzo | My Father's House, Sylvia Fraser | To The Daughter Who Secretly Longs For Her Mother’s Affection, Lynne Shako | Storms from Jupiter, Wanda Deglane | DO NOT REPLY, @filmnoirsbian