#I love a group of gay chaos gremlins

[sorbriquette]

Playing fire emblem 3 houses again.

Completely OBSSESSED with the black eagles again.

Truly the most discordant group of eccentric little weirdos to ever become found family.

Edelgard is out here tryna be normal but she cant help but drop ominous foreshadowing and insane questions.

Hubert is slinking around all sinister and trying to make everyone behave with threats and insults.

Ferdinand is also trying to make everyone behave but with long lectures on nobility. Which should make him and Hubert team up but no they're 20 second from killing each other because Ferdinand is in the worlds most intense one-sided rivalry with Edelgard.

Linhardt, a 'problem child' just wants to take naps, read books and have unmedicated ADHD. He's a rude lil shit who will just drop a 'goodbye' to end of conversation.

Caspar is somehow BFFs with Linhardt but all they do is bicker and have the 'my dad could beat up your dad' arguement. And Caspar just want to fight everything 90% of his supports are people saying 'Caspar, NO!" while he screams "CASPAR YES!"

Dorothea is doing her darnedest to flirt with everyone she meets (except Ferdie who she openly hates) like a true gold-digging bisexual disaster. And she keeps breaking into song.

Bernadetta is Bernadetta. Switches between running in fear and begging for mercy because she thinks everyone is trying to kill her. Wont come out of her room to the point where Caspar picks her up (not cool) and runs her out to see the gdamn sun for once in her life.

Petra is the only one who can be normal for more than 5 minutes and she's the youngest at FIFTEEN.

In conclusion they are terrible and no one can do it better worse.

None of the other houses come close

[bleep-bloop-boo]

₊˚✧ ✰ ‧₊˚✧ ✰ ◡̈ ✧ INTRO ✧ ◡̈ ✰‎ ✧˚₊‧ ✰‎ ✧˚₊

hihihihihihhihihi WELCOME TO MY VERY AMAZING AND TOTALY NOT CHAOTIC MESS OF A BLOG :DD IM PRETTY FRIENDLY, COME SAY HI!!! OPEN TO ALL appropriate ASKS AND DMS!!! This is a big mess of all my interests hehe Reblog heavyyy i love making friends so plss flood my DMs, i love meeting ppl (i will act weird tho, this is a warning) esp to give me recs for books/shows/media in general I thrive on chaos. PLEASE GIVE ME RANDOM ASKS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEE spam me MY DMS ARE ALWAYS OPEN IF ANYONE WANTS TO VENT!!! (i may not be the best at comforting but I can listen <33)

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Matching banners with @gay--gh0st THEYRE SO TALENTEDD, THEY DREW ITT go follow em, right now, they're awesome :DD Also, I did not draw my own pfp unfortunately :(( It was my irl friend who's tumblr I do not know....... yet >:)

MY OTHER ACCOUNTS:

@that-dam-heartstopper-fan convinced me to make a pjo rp account! if i followed a rp account, its meant to be from @delilah-isnt-dead-yett

follow @evilforestcult for my chaotic ADHD with @fairyycoffin godly mysteries AND @i-eat-so-much-grass gremlin vibes

i also have a Mitchell blog (from pjo)!! its for a rp group with me, @that-dam-heartstopper-fan and @boba-pearl. GO FOLLOW @the-forgotten-son-of-aphrodite

𖦹‧☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ ⋆｡𖦹°‧ ☆⋆｡𖦹°‧ ★‧°𖦹｡⋆☆ ‧°𖦹｡⋆ ★‧°𖦹｡⋆☆‧𖦹

☁︎ You can call me Honey! Or any other nicknames! I LOVE NAMES THAT MAKE NO SENSE <333 (@graysonhawthorneswife has declared its Honey Honeyington) ☁︎ Pronouns: she/her ☁︎ Age: I'm a minor (no being weird okay?) and heading to 10th grade! ☁︎ Time Zone: PST (im a california gurl, yes, i am ✨magical✨)

🎧★ 𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𖤣𓋼 MUSIC 𓋼𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼 ★ 🎧

✰ CAVETOWN <33 ✰ PENELOPE SCOTT ✰ MADILYN MEI ✰ Taylor Swiftt hehe ✰ Olivia Rodrigo ✰ musical soundtracks 𖦹 SIX the musical 𖦹 hamilton 𖦹 HEATHERS <333 𖦹 the lightning thief 𖦹 EPIC the musical GIMME RECS FOR GOOD ROCK/INDIE MUSIC TO LISTEN TO PLEASEEEE, LIKE FLOOD MY INBOX WITH SONGS

★ 𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𖤣𓋼 FANDOMS 𓋼𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼 ★

✰ Percy Jackson (Books) ✰ School Bus Graveyard (Webtoon) ✰ Owl House (Show) ✰ Your Turn to Die (Video Game) ✰ Gravity Falls (Show) ✰ Avatar the Last Airbender (Show) ✰ Hunger Games (Books) ✰ Miraculous Ladybug (Show) ✰ Homesick (Webtoon) ✰ Doki-Doki Literature Club (Video Game) ✰Jackson's Diary (Webtoon) IF YOU KNOW/LIKE ANY OF THEM SCREAM AT ME PLEASE, ILL SCREAM BACK PROLLY!!! WE CAN BE A BUNCH OF SQUAWKING CROWS TOGETHER!!!

★ 𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𖥧 MORE ABOUT ME :DD 𖥧 𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼 ★

I'm an ENFP (mbti nerd hehe)

Hufflepuff <33

Can't spell... Good luck figuring out what im saying!

very deranged when prompted

MENTAL HEALTH ADVOCATE (abelists, pls DNI)

GIANT ALLY (homophobes/transphobes, pls DNI)

Hyperactive and very random! (lemme know if you're overwhelmed by that sorta stuff, ill try to tone it down :) )

Chatterbox! Love talking, just can't start conversations! DM or send me asks though!

very very curious, love talking to ppl about studies and fun facts

Character my friends associate me with and I relate to the most: Luz Noceda from the Owl House

My vibes are all over the place- (im emo, cutesy, and chaotic)

I MISS TONS OF SOCIAL CUESS!!! I'm trying to work on it but if i ever overstep my boundaries or make you uncomfy, pleasee let me know <33 im just a bit oblivious sometimes

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My amazing moots! You all make me so happy :DD (pleaseee remind me to add you or take you off <33 ) @ashthenerdtheythem @y0urnewstepp4r3nt @whyamionthisgodforsakensite @queen-of-weird-girl-nation @boredcoldandhungry @nosanehumanallowed @roselandsrl @apollocabinrep @mybedroomceilingsbored @gay--gh0st @catinasink @redmegarex @chaoticgremlin-1 @totalcharliespringsimp @cabin-7-bitch @lunarcat982 @chriscrosswallflower-blog @obsessingoverl @pretentious-media @small-giggle @rose-bug-bear @aheartstopperfan @dandelionsarenotweeds @rookhuntt @i-eat-so-much-grass @justafrogghost @fairyycoffin @th3-st4r-gur1 @brains-out-rn @arsenic-laced-tums @dracosleftarsecheek @boba-pearl @tarantulaluv @rainydaywithcats @touslin @gay-little-isopod @ali-da-demon @kairos-in-space @thebookshelflord

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Okieeee I THINK THATS IT :OO i am done aesthicifyingfjhjjendndjfgh my into post!! I have no tagging system so uhhhhh my blog is pretty much the equivalent of screaming into the void :)) Have fun in my little corner of chaos and pleaseeeeeeee say hi, i love talking with ppl and making friends!!!

Thanks for reading! (its a lot, ik, i blabber, i tried to bold key parts) Boop! Bye <33

[mayabunny23]

Cringe ass Headcanons about the Don't Starve Together Gang's gender and sexuality

Wilson - Aroace He cares more about science and being a smart ass than he does romance or sex.

Willow - Lesbian She seems like the type of girl that scares men away on purpose... Gremlin woman.

Wolfgang - Aroace He would rather settle down with a friend than a lover. The man also sees most of the people in the group as friends.

Wendy - Aroace She is a kid but even if she was an adult, her grief for her sister is stronger than any love for someone (be is romantic or what not)

WX-78 - Non-binary & Aroace They are canonically non-binary so the obvious is obvious. They don't feel romantic feelings but they can feel many other forms of love... they are not truly emotionless.

Wickerbottom - Asexual Biromantic She wouldn't mind a partner to help her at her library but she might not go with any of the people here... except maybe Wanda.

Woodie - Pansexual More like axe-sexual... Wait wouldn't that make every ship with him a polycule? He loves Lucy but if he was to love someone that wasn't a talking axe, he wouldn't care what gender they are.

Wes - Demiboy & Asexual Wes feels like the type to be referred to with he / them... Be it because of the character he plays or because that's what they refers to themself as.

Maxwell - Bisexual "I miss my wife, Wilson... I miss her a lot... I'll be back." he swings both ways but uh... who wants this pathetic man outside of Charlie?

Wigfrid - Demigirl & Bisexual This queen of theater (Sorry Charlie) uses she / them much the same way Wes does... that and she is just cool like that. Oh and she likes people.

Webber - Demiboy & Aroace His reasoning for being demiboy is because he is literally two beings and the spider is a they / it... also same thing as Wendy, his fixation on bugs and critters is stronger than dumb romantic love. (If he was like an adult)

Winona - Butch [Lesbian] Obvious thing is obvious, she has a girlfriend back on Earth that thinks she's dead. Also like look at her, she is straight up very butch leaning.

Warly - Gay The other side of the spectrum, Warly is probably gay... Totally not because Waokevale and another person influenced me with Warly x Woodie...

Wortox - Aroace Mortal concepts as "love" and "sex" doesn't interest this imp, he is only after chaos and fun.... Also Wortox gives zero DAMNs what pronouns you use on Wortox.

Wormwood - Non-Binary & Aroace The lad doesn't know or really feel that type of stuff [And it's not because he is a "kid", he is an adult.], Wormwood only uses he / him pronouns on himself because they sound nice but he doesn't mind any pronouns really.

Wurt - Aroace Wurt is a kid and she's more focus on creating a merm kingdom and learning to really care.

Walter - Aroace Kid doesn't care about romance but probably had a crush at some point.

Wanda - Asexual Lesbian Wanda doesn't have time to have sex with your mother, she is trying not to turn into dust.

Wonkey - Literally not even a real character.

If you scrolled down this far or read this, thanks! this is probably hell to read for people with like... reading issues (I have some form of it, don't worry)

I might do the DLC characters from Don't Starve next but uh... maybe never, just need to remember they exist.

ALSO!!!!!!! If none of the headcanons suit you then be happy knowing they are HEADcanons and are not real...

ALSO Also... sorry for no art bros, been doodling ocs shit for discord server and no one would be interested in that.

[arty-shadow-morningstar]

So today there was this class where the teacher wanted us to learn how to be "empathetic".

Context is that this is the first day of the second semester back and this class is basically giving an environment for us to learn on how to interact with people different from yourself and work together to tackle a problem. (It's mandatory for us students.) So it had a mix of students (age 18-21) from different courses grouped together. We don't know anyone. We won't interact outside of this class.

She also wanted the pre-assigned groups of ppl to get to know each other a little better using this exercise as a team bonding activity.

Continuing on,

The exercise goes like this:

Each person in the group is a part of the family unit (u can be the mom,dad, child, grandparent and even the pet)

You are all living in the same house

Then you draw up what budget looks like for the family in a month.

The thing about this is that this class is happening at the end of a long day. A very long first day back to school, at least for me.

So chaos is waiting to be unleashed from inside of me.

My classmate, who I know is a shit stirrer, was also part of my group. There was also a guy who claimed to be a professional gaslighter during our icebreaker exercises.

It started simple.

My classmate (who we will call C) tells us that he will be the rich grandpa and the rest of us will be his family who is mooching off his wealth.

The two seemingly less chaotic people of the group goes on to take the role of mom and dad. Useless detail to add but the one claiming to be the mom is a guy. (Yay! Fuck traditional gender roles or sth)

In chaos gremlin mode, I claim the title of the aunt (divorced once and secretly gay) and sisters with the mom. The aunt hates the mom because of sibling rivalry and also because the mom was better than her. So the aunt is bitter and jealous and a hater.

Mr. Professional Gaslighter goes on to be the adopted kid taken in by the mom and dad.

Then C shared a google doc so we can use it to draw up the budget.

Clearly, the budget would need some context to explain the expenses so we used that opportunity to expand the backstory of our characters.

Meet Grandpa Xavier Demarcus Ang used to be a criminal and hv connections with the mafia. That explained his wealth. And also on life support.

He adopted 13 year old Nino Mazino as his grandson to be the heir to his empire and teaching the ways of the family business.

Little Nino is suspected of criminal activities, expert gaslighter (has framed the dad for something once)

Then the two Ang daughters:

Calista Ang (my character) the unmarried Aunt. Coporate Slave who does shady deals with shady people (her dad is a mafia boss so obvi she was a little bit in the underground world). Basically a professional hater. Hates her sister. Hates her brother in law. Hates the kid. Greatest desire is to unplug Xavier's life support and get her inheritance.

Cheryl Ang-Tan (Mom) social media influencer by day, taxi driver at night, single on tinder profile with another husband on the side. She is planning to divorce her current husband in 2 months.

Finally:

John Tan (Dad and perhaps the only normal character who should never have gotten involved with the family) office worker who wants to make more money and get promoted.

If you expected us to make a perfectly normal budget plan after making up that whole drama filled backstory, you are dead wrong.

-----

The basic budget plan the teacher wanted us to make:

Accommodation:

Food:

Groceries:

Utilities:

Clothes:

Any other expenses:

-----

The budget we made:

Accommodation: $3500/mon (bc we lived in a 4 bedroom flat and mortgage paid for by Xavier. This is the number they pick don't ask me how they got it.)

Food: $300 per person /month

Groceries: $450/month

Utilities: $550/month (because we want hot showers but Xavier would kill us we ever try to take a bath)

Finally the best part:

Clothes: $4588/ month (bc mommy and aunty love designer clothes)

Under any expense you can think of:

Car gas: $300/month (bc Calista needs a car to get to work and Cheryl is a 'taxi driver' at night)

Hospital bills: $5000/month (bc rmb Xavier is on life support)

-----

So while other groups got their total budget to be around 3~5k /month. Our group got over 15k /month as our total and we were mostly mooching off Xavier's wealth.

Then the teacher revealed the next step of the exercise:

Suddenly, your gross total household income has become $1500 per month. What will you do?

We had to redo our budget.

My suggestion to pull the plug on Xavier was well met and we made the almost unanimous decision to kill off Xavier Demarcus Ang bc his hospital bills were too high and he was dying anyways. We also needed his inheritance to live on. (You were a shit dad, Calista said to her father as he laid on his deathbed)

Then, we found out that Xavier was a spiteful shit that made it so little Nino got his inheritance and no one could access it.

Unfortunately, the family had to downgrade to a 2 bedroom flat bc the rent is cheaper. But that would mean that there was not enough space for 4 people.

The sisters made the decision to kick Nino out into the streets because he was so useless anyways. John was only kept around bc he contributed something(money) to the household.

The once mighty Ang family resorted to a meal a day, quick cold showers once a week and the bare minimun to survive.

The Ang sisters had to make the hardest decision to stop buying designer clothes and they couldn't afford any new ones right now.

(If you are asking why we didn’t sell the car or our expensive clothes, the rule was that we couldn't increase the budget by selling things so there was no point in selling anything)

-----

The new budget:

Accommodation: $150/month

Food: $200

Groceries: $200

Utilities: $200

Clothes: $50

Car gas: $0 (bc we ain't driving anywhere bc the gas price is high and the car remained a relic of pur former glory days)

Public transport fee: $50

Hospital bills: $0

-----

You might be wondering where the empathy part of the exercise it.

Well....

The teacher announced that the student playing the character that would be most affected by the changes in the budget to come up and tell us

What the hardest decision to make was?

What was the easiest decision?

Who was the most affected and how?

Our Answers:

The decision to stop buying designer clothes. And kicking the adopted kid out because he got the inheritance no one can get but no one wants him around anymore. Nino was Xavier's favourite so everyone hated him.

Easiest decision was pulling the plug on Xavier. Dude was dying alr and we couldn't the hospital bills even if we wanted to.

Most affected was Nino. And Mr. Pro Gaslighter gave this whole tragic story of how he was abandoned by the family since Grandpa Xavier was the only one to care about him and with him gone, Nino no longer had his protection. This 13 year old made his way in the world by catching pigeons in the park and making satay out of the birds in order to feed himself or sell them to ppl for a dollar a stick.

Me and C were giggling like mad the entire time.

Hilariously, the teacher went along with the entire thing and ask normal questions like:

"How would your friends feel about your new homeless situation?"

They don't know about it because I haven't been back in school bc the Ang family were sponsoring me and now they aren’t sponsoring me and I can't go to school.

"Where are you sleeping since you were kicked out?"

On a park bench

"How are you feeding yourself?"

I make satays out of the pigeon I catch and sell them for a dollar a stick. Also I steal from the Angs when they are not home. Grandpa taught me a lot of tricks.

-----

With each word coming out of his mouth, everyone was trying not to burst out laughing.

Honestly, I was dying of laughter and holding back tears at the end of it.

The teacher eventually decided to move onto another group because our group had taken too long. I think she was a bit in disbelief of how far we had taken the entire thing.

Our family dynamic had to be the most toxic out of the all of them and filled with drama.

It was shit but oh what glorious shit it was.

[timkonshipper]

How I imagine Ash’s relationship with his friends to be(Part 1):

Ash, brock & misty are the og trio: There’s no way that brock and misty don’t hold a very special place in Ash’s heart. Ash knows he wasn’t the most likeable child but his journeys with the two of them transformed him into the Ash he is now. Whenever Ash sees rock themed stuff or unique cooking utensils, his mind immediately goes to brock. Same with water themed shit and bug pokemon. He talks with them quite regularly and the group chat they have is complete chaos. Brock is Ash’s big brother. He’s the first one Ash turns to for comfort. Misty and Ash start bickering, bantering and making fun of each other within 2 minutes of talking, but know that the other would wholeheartedly back them up no questions asked. 

Ash and Gary are the ultimate besties: They grew up together and were there for each other during the hardest parts of their lives - Ash’s father leaving and Gary’s parents dying. They motivate each other to be the best versions of themselves that they can be. In my ideal world, Ash and Gary did not have quite a big falling out as shown in the show because they talked things out and didn’t let any misunderstandings get in the way of the special bond they have. Although they act quite gay for each other, their relationship is 100% platonic (I personally love ash x gary however their friendship dynamic where everybody thinks they’re dating but they’re actually not and don’t ever plan to be is my fav). Ash is the one who helped Gary realise that researching was the path for him. 

Ash, Max and Bonnie: Max and Bonnie are the little siblings that he never had. He loves them to pieces and even if they can get a little annoying sometimes, he wouldn’t change it for the world. Whenever he sees anything that he thinks Max would like, he buys it without hesitation and mails it over. Same goes for bonnie. Both May and Clemont are completely exasperated because their respective siblings keep flexing whatever Ash has gotten for them. 

Ash & May are the gremlin twins: Brock had quite the time with these two. He thought that no-one could surpass the trouble that Ash and Misty gave him but he was wrong. Those two would get too caught up in arguing with each other, but these two were on the same wavelength. Sure they had a few disputes but most of the time they got along like a house on fire. They managed to get themselves into all sorts of crazy situations. Max and Brock would have to work together to manage whatever shenanigans they got upto. Ash is insufferable in shipping May and drew. He teases her and mocks her and writes cringy fanfictions about the two of them so he could embarrass her. 

They always practice battling together so they can refine their needed skills (contest flair for may and speed and precision for Ash). When the two of them get together, they can eat anyone out of house and home. 

[hazelelel]

hi please tell me about your OCs or I guess your favorite pretty please ok thanks bye

I actually don't have many active ocs atm.

-I do have this Harry Potter oc named Jackson that, long story short, was a chaos gremlin muggle that accidentally found Hogwarts and his only power was being immune to the obliviate spell (having his mind wiped) so all the magical folk were forced to keep him around and he eventually becomes a teacher. He does shit like wander into the forest and come back covered in pink glittery hair and someone is like "Is that highly valuable, highly rare unicorn hair???" and he'll be like "Oh you mean that weird horse I found in the woods? yeah idk maybe." He introduces Dumbledore to Kdramas and phonk and Snape to fancy light up ballpoint pens and MCR.

-I had another oc named Gray that was really odd because they ended up being named the Creature of Limbo, not quite human or magical or anything, just unsettlingly connected to this sort of liminal space forest and had some other weird horror stuff happen with a string of fate and abomination flowers which symbolized their soul and yada yada...

-Had an oc pair named Goose and Lynx. Lynx was a shapeshifter and a bastard. Goose was their sister and like secretly a teeny weeny bit evil. I really enjoyed writing her because one of her lines is "Arguably the most Slytherin thing a Slytherin can do is to not be in Slytherin..."

(A little extra lore) Lynx creates a new spell that can be cast from anywhere in the body and invents a move called ✨The Claps of Magic✨ where both Lynx and Goose stand back to back, handspring backwards, and land with both their feet on one another in handstands so that they can both wall twerk off of one another.

^^ here is an crappy sketch so i look less insane

they do this when they are threatened with the consequences of their actions

ummm...

-Had a Criminal Minds oc who was Spencer Reids cousin named Flute and he was an amputee (had his leg lobbed off by a serial killer who he ends up killing later). He helps the team for a bit. His leg lights up so like, "Hey Flute, mind turning off the leg?" "Why?" "I can't see the blood splatters when your leg is making everything look like a gay rave." He sometimes hits people with it and when he does, it plays the Seinfeld theme (and other rage inducing fight appropriate songs).

-Another oc named Foil that was in love with this guy, basically an unrequited love story, but then throw in some magic and it centers around this Cult of the White Shadow. They are a group of people trying to live forever through time magic (they believe that erasing parts of your own past tricks the time continuum into making you live longer. It doesn't). Foil finds out if they go through with this ritual that basically time will collapse which is NOT GREAT and she tries to stop them. She arrives on the scene and as a last resort throws herself into the time sigil to stop it and gets mega cursed™. The cult is stopped but she is screwed as she is wiped from history and forgotten (damn time magic). Forgotten Foil would be her nickname lol. She is my angst oc because she's always like "WhY shOuld i livE iF nOOne KnOwS WhO I Am wAhH-" ~~(🎶they call me mr forgettable 😩🫠🎶)~~

anyways imma stop there because that's a lot already even if I have a few more tucked away. most of these are not in active use and are pretty fluid because I can't make a concrete decision for shit

Thanks for the ask :)

[justablah56]

TJ anon once again: this is great because it's like writing a multi chapter fic but there's no plot and it's made for a readership of one person

Cass "Hey, if there's no security footage, there's no proof" Swift-Close-Foster-Freeman-Stampler is definitely a bit of a chaos gremlin. She and Lark once almost got arrested for public indecency when she got him to unbutton her shirt in a nightclub. Why? No one really bothered to ask, they were too busy trying to bargain with the police. One of them turned out to be Jodie's old work mates, who let them off.

You know what, this is going to be a clubbing themed ask. Disclaimer: I have never been clubbing. Legally, I cannot

The kiddads, Rebecca, Marco, and Cassandra have gotten kicked out of multiple clubs. At some point, they developed a system to create the wildest night possible, involving when you can start dancing on tables, and the best place to make friends for the night. The answer to the latter is the girls' bathroom. There is always a crying drunk girl in a bathroom, and Cassandra and Rebecca are very skilled at comforting and befriending them. Your boyfriend broke up with you? And he's here with his new girlfriend? Girl, you're so much better than him, we will buy you drinks and hype you up. We have 6 hot men who will dance with you and treat you like a goddamn celebrity for the entire night, let's show that fucker how much you don't need him. And if you're worried about them being weird, two of them are gay and all of them are respectful. Have some discount coupons for Swallows Ice Cream and a random makeover. We will turn a terrible night into one of the best for you.

Certain members of the group have been mistaken for erotic dancers on multiple occasions. No comment as to who. It does mean that they have more money for drinks though.

Cassandra and Nicky will be the ultimate gnc couple. Cass goes in a suit, but one of those more casual ones that have lowcut shirts and a deliberately loose tie. Nicky goes in a crop top and mini skirt with fishnets. They have switched outfits part way through the night without people noticing at least 7 times, because honestly, they would both wear each outfit.

Terry and Lark are usually the sober ones, as Lark is often the designated driver, and Terry just assigns himself designated drunk people wrangler. Since they're also the two who (at the time) are not in a committed romantic relationship, they carefully accumulated embarrassing moments for everyone's weddings, knowing that there was no sufficient retribution.

(Side headcanon that Terry and Lark go on platonic Valentine's dates every year in college/uni. They take lots of photos of Terry being cutesy and couple-y and Lark just being grumpy. Terry Jr always buys him sunflowers for the date, and although he'd never admit it, he keeps them for as long as possible. One year, TJ actually had a girlfriend on Valentine's Day, but he told her he was busy and still went on the date with Lark. She broke up with him after seeing the pictures of them together on social media, which, in retrospect, Terry Jr admits was completely fair)

hello again tj anon !! <3 also , this is great bcs I get soso many hcs and fun storylines that are vaguely connected , all written specifically for me to read and it's absolutely lovely <3333

anyways , the kiddads and co just being the most chaotic clubbers to ever exist <333 they commit enough crimes when they're sober , so it only makes sense they'd commit even more when drunk LMAO but them also just being like . that one story that a bunch of random girls have . just some club cryptids that find random sad girls and then proceed to be the nicest people ever and give them the night of their lives dbnsnsmsm also multiple of them being mistaken for strippers 😭😭 love that for them honestly <3 also glad to see Nicky is continuing Glenn's legacy of having the most gnc "straight" relationship to ever exist <333 them sharing outfits is everything , actually <3333 but lark and terry collecting everyone's embarrassing moments for weddings dbjsnssksk they are so silly <33 it's just the Lark and Terry dynamic !!!! they are the qpps of all time !!!!! and Terry ditching his gf of valentine's for lark 🥺 like yes that sucks for the gf , but Terry and Lark !!!! I love them !!!!!

[what-if-nct]

Is it odd that lately I've found myself wanting more chaotic bi's in my male kpop groups? Like I only follow like 5 with any degree of regularity and 3 of them have one. Or at least one that strongly hints or may have hinted such in the past. Don't get wrong either I love my glass closet gays too but they aren't that kind of chaotic, ya know?

No not at all the only chaotic bi I can think of is Yuta, he's the definition of chaos and has the strongest bi energy I've ever seen. As a bi I can sense the bi energy. Like Lauren Jauregui, Doja Cat and Dove Cameron very strong bi energy. I'm on the fence about Selena Gomez but I am hopeful. Just one chance Selena. Doja is the most chaotic of the them though. Lauren is close behind. Yuta fits very well in this but he's the only male idol I get that energy from. Though I also see Baekhyun, but he has more bi gremlin energy like Awsten Knight (not bi but he wants to be, seriously he said that) but speaking of I want a show, a podcast, a live anything with Keeho and Kevin Moon. Like it would be the funniest hour ever and I need it. I mean you could throw in Ten, but I wanna see Key and Ten together more.

[unrepentantcheeseaddict]

Character Intros For The Changeling Trilogy

So, I have news . . .

I started the first draft of Book 1 of the Changeling Trilogy! I’m only about a chapter and a half in, but I’m delighted with how it’s turning out so far. Due to interruptions from family, focusing on it has been a bit of a debacle though. But enough of that, let’s meet the characters. All the changelings are canonly autistic, since A, I am and B, that's probably the original basis for changeling lore anyhow.

River Collins

The main protagonist, a Failed changeling made to take the place of a specific person.

She’s got magic that eventually manifests during Book 1, but it’s mostly good for big flashy combat stuff, and it is NOT easy to control, it’s basically turned on by her fight-or-flight response because she has no training.

Her other thing is keeping a clear head during chaos. She can stay outwardly calm and functional during almost any situation, even if she pays the price with a crying meltdown later once things are settled. River’s always had the autistic feeling of not belonging in her human life, but she discovers that when she's with other changelings, she's in her element and kind of a natural leader, because they get her more than most humans do.

She’s also a huge zoology nerd, I plan to have several scenes of her geeking out over all the weird magical creatures in the Fae Kingdoms.

Luke and Brian Collins

River’s Dads!! They’re alive, they’re happily together, and they’re supportive of anything their little girl does, even if that’s leading a rebellion in a magical underworld. Think Sally Jackson but they’re a nerdy gay couple.

Snaketongue

Our love interest. Sharp features, fair skin, messy dark hair. Like all changelings that weren’t made to impersonate a specific human, he’s got some nonhuman features and abilities. In his case, a forked tongue like a snake and slit-pupiled yellow eyes. He’s got an amazing sense of smell, he can pick out and identify almost any scent in any situation.

Snaketongue was the closest thing the group had to a leader before River took charge, and he still sometimes resents her and chafes against her decisions. He can be cocky, headstrong, hotheaded, and impulsive, but he’s got a good heart and is unswervingly loyal if you can actually manage to earn his trust and respect. River eventually manages to, and from that point on they’re best friends (and also mutual pining idiots).

Cami

She’s the group’s resident chaos gremlin, bringing her own brand of cheerful, earnest mayhem to everything she does. Loud and friendly and silly, the life of the party and the one who tries to cheer everybody up when morale is low.

Cami has a mohawk-like ridge of scales on her head instead of hair, and smaller patches of scales across her body. She can change the color of both her skin and scales at will, to either stand out or blend in.

Whisper & Spider

Aka just The Twins, they’re cynical, brutally honest, and willing to do just about anything for the people they care about. Also kinda codependent tbh. They’re tiny for their age, more like the size of a human ten-year-old. They have thin, iridescent black feathers instead of head and body hair, sharp talon-like clawed nails, and they can move unnervingly quietly.

Star

The group’s magical healer, bioluminescent night light, and Mom Friend™. She’s tall, slim, and albino with long hair and a long, thin, whiplike prehensile tail.

Alenza

The girl River was crafted to replace, who’s alive and well as the wife of a prince in one of the Fae Kingdoms. She’s always been told she was saved from an unsafe human family, so when she finds out the truth, it causes an identity crisis that sends her spiralling into a full-blown villain arc.

[caffeinatedopossum]

Choose your character

A lot of you wanted another tag yourself post so here ya go. Sorry some of them are oddly specific

Bendy straw:

- chronically ill or disabled, knows a bunch of weird medical facts because they've had to do their doctors job for them

- childish but also an old soul. Likes stuffies, straws, kids meals, coloring books etc. but comes off older than they are because trauma aged them too fast

- full of Gatorade and exasperation (iykyk)

- can NOT sit correctly and not just because they're gay, will sit on the floor given the opportunity

'skip thinner, wak up dinner' 🥴

- bestie please up your cal intake, I mean this in the nicest way possible

- just a bit delusional and completely incomprehensible

- touch starved, attention starved, and just plain old regular starved

- completely anorexiapilled

- *experiences an episode of self awareness* uhhh...so, anyway chile-

- "yk 1200 is less than what a child would eat right" 👁👄👁

The lorax:

- speaks for the trees, loves nature but also shit talks it all the time

- stoner witch all the way, has a tarot deck but never uses it because they're salty about being called out

- anxiety is through the roof without 🍃🍃

- hehe r a w c k s (you cannot stop them, if they see a rock they must have it)

- complete gremlin, the chaos energy abounds

Bubble tea spiked with prozac:

- actually tries to be normal

- basic bitch in denial. Studyblr and Starbucks aesthetic

- will never live up to their own high standards. Seriously please give yourself a break, hun

- is actually very multifaceted but is surrounded by too much judgment (internal and external 🙃) to embrace it

- definitely was a gifted kid. Please stop lying to your physciatrist, I see you 👀

-and for the love of god stop defending your parents, there's no excuse

Hyperpop:

- somehow manic and depressed simultaneously

- very obvious caffeine addiction

- bright colors and loud music. likes being overstimulated to block out the feelings. Needs constant distractions

- alt, neurodivergent, and genderqueer

- absolutely hilarious, 10/10 sense of humor. Never fails to make the whole friend group laugh (haha pls check up on them srsly I'm kinda worried)

- basically ??? from the last tag yourself but if you knew them irl and offline

[luminous-shifting-vibes]

*sequel* to actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server

once again, it's out of context because x1000 funnier

also x1000 longer than previous post

"ur satan is gnc af"

"Bestie I’m already having gender envy over a fucking demon please"

"O_O ODEPIJHFbavevisdpvfhzdcnjawedsidjksjdkoeirjfmkdsoeirujdksodifjndmksoidfjdksidfj ITS" NOT IN MY FRAFTS IS SPEDNT 1 hour PN THAT SHIT"

"AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"ohoho sexy"

"I am very proud of myself"

"himbo x edgy fuck"

"YOU COULD SQUISH HES CHEECKS"

"he has teefs"

"SQUASH"

"good for biting 📷"

"he's a himbo basically"

"B͂̒̄iͫ̍̈tͧ̓ͯè̄̇"

"bifth"

"i havent watched blue exorcist in years but mr okumura my beloved </3"

"MY LIFE QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED"

"is it important information to mention that the person i put up for my turn is the son of satan" "I know like 1 thing about everyone who isnt ranboo lmfao"

"crimes"

"tumblr sexyman"

"idk why but my first thought was cowboy onceler"

"I vibe with him but he is very long and twisty"

"steampunk e-girl"

"steampunk tumblr sexyman"

"Canonically bi crimelord I agree!!"

"OOO FRIEND SHAPED"

"ARTIST SIGHTED"

"they look like someone i would want to be friends with but is way cooler than me so i'd never actually talk to them"

"babby..... would die for him"

"honestly i probably kin him"

"i'm sure he's lovely but he looks way too much like my ex i'm sorry-"

"i'd be down for another rotation! i have another twink to show y'all"

"Also :00 blonde friend"

"Let us all infodhmo"

"Hsjagdvbs shhh im on phone"

"Nix woukd you like to joon?

"skitters away"

"I have two braincells and they both drink dumb bitch juice"

"oof wait whats the order again i have 0 memory"

"i want to bond with him over cosplay-"

"Awkwardly watches in band kid"

"One day I'm gonna a broadway star"

"which isnt to say they were bad. they were just fortnite dancing during rehersals"

"I threw it so hard my glasses flew off and slid under the stage right divider"

"anyway heres my boi"

"emo"

"haha emo"

"virgil sanders kinnie"

"he looks like he listens to my chemical panic at the fallout boy"

"Bro I bet he'd kick my ass with his deck"

"bird man my beloved"

"fuck i had so much to say and then i forgot it all"

"Birds!!"

"guiguhuh"

"crabrave"

"She sounds like someone I would end up stealing her personality"

"yess name collector gang"

"alias glass aiden haven absinthe fish brick rice"

"But I have Cypress, Remure, Genesis, Lemres, and Comet"

"And she's named after a mars candy bar bc alien"

"Hey, if plato went by plato, you can be king thief"

"im not dissing my gramma like that shfojd"

"My dad has seven legal names" "bitches be like *looks at fictional character* *steals their name* it's us we're bithces"

"coraline lowkey traumatized me but i adore it regardless"

"mmmmmm magic man :]"

"°0° green man"

"criminal (affectionate)"

"he would shoplift a candy bar from walmart and then brag to all of his friends about the sick stealing he did"

"despite the fact he's canonically been capable of overpowering a minor deity"

"i would commit so many crimes for him"

"Very babey"

"Yes please tell green man he is very pog"

"he also keeps a lot of dumb secrets"

"but I will sorely miss the chaos and energy of this here chat until I wake again" (by request XD)

"i just say words and if they're funny then they're funny"

"* or extremly chaotic either works"

"at this point we are just taking turns rambling"

"oH--"

"bc my brain has a schedule"

"Hopefully they have gyoza there or I will lose my mind"

"hehe yes spooky man"

"my ghost glucose guardian"

"the head of the undead group that lives there, and we end up dating. (yes I date a ghost, no I will not be taking constructive criticism /lh)"

"ghosts r just inherently sexy"

"i mean im becoming a squid thing so"

"Raven quirk raven quirk!!"

"ł â m p"

"łæmp"

"mothman: ooh lamp you look very nice today! do you come here often? mothman: wait shit no"

"I'd date a ghost"

"mine is still accurate, i am still sobbing (/j)"

"p e e p e e"

""@nick wilde is a tumblr sexyman" is the best thing i have ever seen"

"im sorry im cackling like a dying hyena"

"you're all 12 year olds"

"PEENIE"

"He once caused global warming on accident so he could get a tan"

"god, what a himbo. i love him"

"that reminds me of my friends kin assigned me jesus"

"Man outside of battle be like: princely crying but then in battle hes like: "CATACLYSM! DISASTER! DEVASTATION!" Chill out man"

"Every time I talk about satan it never fails to shock people it's my favorite thing to do"

"im kin assigning him roman sanders" ""Oh yeah he caused global warming because he wanted to get girls" "he what""

"oh damn i forgot satan was straight"

"twink appreciation club"

"give us the twinks"

"my first thought was bottom-"

"so many people to try and get his dad to love him"

"daddy issued"

"OH MY GOD ITS WILBUR"

"Big boy but"

"anyways janus is swagggg"

"........................."

"gib twink"

"give twink then i will share"

"holds him gentle like hamburger"

"This dumb bitch opened a book that said "do not open" and got possessed by a little bastard"

"he is. fragile creachur"

"klug is beauty klug is grace i would let him step on my face"

"If I'm playing swap and I have to hear one more "Pwanet Powew" Im gonna lose it"

"Who is to blame? Pandora or the box?"

"Bakugo isnt my type but I respect the drip"

"i say like my type isnt long-haired pretty boys and girls that look so gnc that people have a history of confusing them for men"

"hes a gremlin and i can appreciate a pretty gremlin"

"that is to say i am attracted to VFlower vocaloid. This is a confession."

"note i am a lesbian"

"You may like Schezo wegey"

"why does he have one single expression"

"soul soul eater passes the vibe check"

"magic wand"

"I Want To Hold His Hand"

"i would commit a war crime for him any war crime idc which one"

"my favorite one is when he sounded rlly gay because he said "Muscular bodies keep me satisfied""

"p e a n u t"

"Klug is a homophobic homosexual its just facts"

"grug from the croods is peak male performance"

"jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely."

"tag yourself im the fireworks shooting from the top of the head"

"i like essays"

"central time gang"

"11:11 pog-" (wait... is that a suprise angel number?? yes it is lovelies just for you <3)

"Then again im also a dumbass bitch who wonders what the souls in soul eater taste like. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. THEY LOOK TASTY AS HELL!!!! LIKE GODDAMN BRO YOU'RE MAKING ME FUCKING HUNGRY. Like. that shit- it's Bone Apple motherfucking Teeth. hell yea my guy. Im hongy now.... shlorp I'm seriously considering this. Like. They seem kinda like a liquid? But a solid? Are they like jello? The fuck they taste like my guy???? I keep imagining they're like sour, like sour candy maybe? Or do they taste salty? Sweet? Maybe some combo of two? Do they even have a taste or is it about the texture? The sensation? God my mouth is watering what the hell. I am starving. I think I need to go get a cookie. I'm gonna go get a cookie. Brb. I'm better. I'm still craving souls though. Which is a weird-ass cringey thing to say but I'm being dead-ass rn. They just.... look tasty???? And I wanna eat one. Thus. I am shifting to Soul Eater for the express purpose of satisfying my fucking cravings. enjoy"

"points were made"

"jello? more like helloooo schloooAHFJDSDAIDWNALDHSJKDAIDANDM"

"WAIT I THINK I HAVE AN ANIME GIRL BITING VIDEO TOO"

"anime girl voice: mmm! mm... ahhhhmp!! mmm, mmm... aaahmp!"

"i think it sounds great i'm going to start eating like that"

"several people are typing"

"do these look edible to you"

"forbidden gummies"

"when I was on lsd I couldn't eat my fruit gummies because I thought they were alive because they had little faces on them"

"oh shit yeah don't do drugs"

"anyways general consensus is puyos are edible, ty for your input everyone"

"everypony is a word so powerful it can bring nations to its knees"

"pls the self control it's taking me not to say "hewwo everypony" in gen chat when someone new joins-"

"hewwo evewrypony uwu deaw cewestia i hopwe it doewsnt wain owo"

"ive cooked up a sowution wiwth the knowwege ive acwued. they say a kitcwen time saves niwne, but im just savwing two. Ive gathewwed the inwedients to make a time sowbet. Thewe's hawdly woom fow seconds when the seconds mewt away."

"I had a ten year old sister... you know what happened to her??? very sad, very tragic... she turned eleven....."

"NIIICE"

"Guts dont say the secks word :( /j"

"watch your fucking language in front of the president"

"im so sorry lumi"

"i think you're like ehhhh 8/10 funny"

"now me???? 10/10. Hilarious"

"sometimes i have to take a step back and remember that this is the same guts i follow on tumblr /lh"

""ok every here's some good shifting advice!!! uwu have a good day" "yeah i did lsd and ate fruit gummies""

"i have one setting and it's whatever this is"

"my bitch ass cat just pushed the door open with his fuzzy face and now my sleeping dad is being lulled into dreams by Cosmo Sheldrake's 'Pliocine'."

"me on discord: nick wilde"

"me on tumblr: shifting water! haha funne! me on here: my hermit crabs are cannibals also i want to eat souls."

"im sorry yOUR VIBESA RE JUST SO DIFFERNT"

"u give off older cousin ive never spoken to but always admire at the family gatherings vibes"

"what the fuck"

"BC I HAVE LIBERTU"

"If you adopt me then yes"

"am I qualified for dad jokes???"

"we're all a lot smarter on tumblr"

"I'm like "awww... sweet... sweet little shiftlings... posting such sweet shiftling content... so pure, so wholesome... does not even know abcs....""

"can't think before you speak if you never think B)"

"I'm not responsible enough to be a mom"

"cat pet"

"show us pictures of the cat or i will do Crime"

"maybe thats me being a coward tho"

"MOTH!!!! MOTH MY BELOVED"

if y'all want I can make this a series bc shiftblr keeps giving me more content

[kuroopaisen]

who are your fave female (anime) characters? <3

ooOO YES I LOVE GIRLS AND TALKING ABOUT MEDIA LET’S GO

okay so

akane tsunemori from psycho-pass 

akane is well-developed, interesting and engaging as a protagonist, and she’s the sort of person you want to root for. the world of psycho-pass is grim and hopeless, but i wanted to see as much capacity for goodness in it that akane does (which she does without being naïve). i also love her dynamic with kogami; they both make each other more interesting, and you can really see how they’ve rubbed off on each other as the series goes on. i could talk about psycho-pass and it’s characters at length but i will Not right now 

nobara kugisaki from jujutsu kaisen

i love most of the girls from jujutsu kaisen, and i’m so glad we finally have a shounen where the girls get to be as diverse and developed as (some of) the boys. but i also love how feral she is; she’s a chaos gremlin and i adore her for it. she’s funny, but her deeper motivations resonate strongly with her character and the actions she takes. i can’t be too sure of my feelings right now, as the show is still running (and i haven’t caught up on the manga), but i think she’s gonna stick with me :’) 

riza hawkeye from fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood

riza provides such an interesting perspective in fma:b and she adds even more depth to the experiences of the characters in the show. and on top of that, she’s sharp, clever, and yet still has a warm compassion which she extends to the kids. i just find her so interesting and well-developed, as well as a good foil for other personalities in the show (see: the team she works with dfkljfds). furthermore, i adore her relationship with roy; there’s a bittersweetness to it, and i just! want them! to be happy! 

winry rockbell from fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood

and i love that winry’s arc includes her learning that she does contribute! a lot of shounen often have female characters bemoan that they’re not as strong or as helpful as the men, and while that is a concern for winry, the trope is subverted in that winry discovers her strengths lie outside of the fighting. i also love her spunk and the fact that she’s still feminine despite having traditionally “masculine” interests (no contrived Strong Female Characters here, just winry fangirling over automail). she’s so cute i adore her 

oliviei armstrong from fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood

okay okay i promise i’ll shut up about fma:b in a bit, but-- i think one of my favourite things about the women in this show is that we see them with a variety of personalities, in a range of positions, and with varying wants and desires. and i love olivei -- i love her strength, her cleverness, her dedication to her subordinates. the narrative doesn’t feel the need to ‘soften’ her with some gap moe moments (something that usually gets on my nerves). she doesn’t need to act ‘feminine’ to show that she cares about her men -- it’s just part of her character. she’s just UGH. i love her. 

princess euphemia from code geass 

now... there are elements of the “benevolent oppressor” in euphemia given the world she lives in and her place in it, and i’m not 100% sure that code geass addressed it enough. but, similar to the other girls on this list, euphemia made me root for her; her kind-hearted yet spitfire personality made me want to protect her and give her all the good things in life. the show and i have very different viewpoints on that, apparently. i loved that while she’s kind, she has a will to fight, and she doesn’t take things lying down; she knows what she wants to achieve, and she’s going to work towards it regardless of anyone else’s opinion. 

emma from the promised neverland

call me basic but i do enjoy the typical shounen protagonist personality (so long as they don’t shout too much), and it’s so nice to see someone other than a early-teens boy stepping into those shoes. but most of all, i love emma’s sheer determination and her kindness. you can tell she really, genuinely cares, and it has an effect on the people around her. but that doesn’t mean she’s above reason, or doesn’t understand the situation she and her family are in; she’s just optimistic, and is willing to do whatever she can to make good on that optimism. i understand that some people might find her frustratingly naïve, but her determination to do and be good resonates with me. 

lenalee from d.grayman

she’s my daughter i love her i would do anything to protect her-- lenalee brings a necessary openness to the group that the other main characters lack (allen, please talk about your feelings i’m begging you--) she’s so sweet and so likeable, and she invokes that Protective Instinct (both in me and in lavi). she’s one of the emotional cores of the show, and i just find her so endearing. 

haruhi fujioka from ouran high school host club

for a show (and manga) of it’s time, i’m genuinely surprised with how her gender non-conformity is handled? like it could be done better, of course, but i appreciated that she was allowed to be uninterested in feminine presentation without it being mocked. that, and i just remember her being... supremely likeable? or maybe i just think that bc she resembles the girl who was my gay awakening dkljfld

[zims-left-shoe]

Agent Mothman (Dib x Male Reader)

Like most of my other fics, characters are aged up to high school. Plus, a friendly reminder that my request box is open!!

The silence was overwhelming. The pressure of everyone's collective held breath was almost palpable, your chest reactively tightening for no good reason. As you looked around you, eyes were wide, jaws were set and clenched in preparation to cringe. The only two who stuck out from the crowd were Zim and Dib, when did they not? Zim looked lost in thought, mind seemingly several thousand galaxies away, hands folded together neatly in front of his face, his chin resting on them. Dib, on the other hand, appeared to be over the whole ordeal. His posture was slouched as he stared ahead at the board through half-lidded eyes. As the quiet persisted, an anxious energy settled over your classmates (besides the two previously mentioned, of course). Eyes twitched, fingernails scraped the tables, feet began to tap restlessly on the floor.

"Y/n." The teacher finally spoke, bringing the whole class to sigh in relief, the building pressure suddenly released all at once. Many students leaned back in their chairs, high fiving each other. "Y/n, you will be partnered with Dib." You shrugged your shoulders as many looked to you in pity, some even whispering their sympathies. You had never aligned yourself with any group in particular throughout your school year. Granted, you were only a few months in, but you had switched schools so much you had learned to play the field. You avoided Dib considering his stigma, enabling you to be tolerated by the majority, however you were never mean to him. In fact, you rather liked him. You only chose to silently observe him rather than act upon your curiosity. 

"But wait, who's going to be paired with Zim?" You heard a student groan, everyone's breath being held once more. You let your gaze drift over to your partner. He seemed relieved, a slight smile settling on his lips. This was probably the best case scenario for everyone. No one else had to work with Dib, and you were the only one who never picked on him for being just a bit different. 

Once your teacher had finished reading names, you were all asked to sit with your partners. Without an ounce of reluctance, you sauntered over to Dib's otherwise empty table, taking one of the many available seats surrounding him. You needed to figure out a plan quickly, considering you only had one night to do the project. The project wasn't super taxing, in fact it seemed almost like busy work that would promote socialization at the same time, but it wasn't like your time frame was ideal. 

"Dib, right?" You held up your hand in a slight wave. "I don't think I've officially introduced myself. I'm Y/n."

"I know. The new kid who has no real friends yet is somehow still deemed acceptable by the popular kids? An anomaly for sure." Red painted his face, his eyes widening as he realized how his words may have came off as. "Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound rude. Or creepy. You know what? I'll just stop talking." An awkward chuckle escaped your lips as his eyes fell to his sneakers. After a slight pause, Dib spoke again, his tone much more reserved than before. "I can just do the whole project and you can put your name on it if you want. It's not that hard." He was giving you an out, not wanting to piss you off. Reaching an arm out, you slugged his shoulder lightly.

"Nah, come on. I don't roll that way. Besides, I want to hang out with you a little."

"You...want to hang out...with me?" Dib pointed a finger to himself, eyes wide behind his large glasses. An incredulous expression was etched into every single feature of his face, as if he couldn't believe those words left your mouth. 

"Yeah." After that syllable, the bell rang, dismissing you from school. You stood up, gathering your things. "Anyway, I'll be at your place after dinner. Just text me your address or whatever." You quickly scribbled your digits down on a scrap piece of paper that was laying around, passing it to him. "See ya!" You dashed away, sneaking one last glance back to see Dib still sitting in his chair, as still as a statue, not believing that this was even happening. 

Your stomach felt as if it was full of butterflies, and you couldn't shake the grin that had spread across your face as you began your walk home. 

God...he was even cuter than I thought... You were embarrassed by your own thoughts, pinching yourself on the arm. Truth was, you may or may not have been stalking him a little. He lived in your neighborhood, and you just couldn't help it. You had always been a hopeless romantic of sorts, and all it took was one look at him in class giving a presentation on the gremlin in his backyard and you were in love. You didn't even need his address, you knew where he lived, but you didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable, so you asked for it anyway. Plus, it was a way to sneak him your number. And it wasn't as if you were actively trying to find out where he lived. It was pretty much impossible to ignore him and Zim screaming at each other as they ran back and forth between their houses all day. 

"This is going to be a long night." You sighed out, foot striking out to kick a rock, the satisfying skittering sounds it made calming your nerves a small amount. 

-

You drew in a deep breath as you brought your fist to the door, rapping on it a few times. Rocking back on your heels, you clutched your notebook and other supplies tightly to your chest, internally cringing at yourself. Everyone at school thought you were incredibly cool, but on the inside, you were just a lovesick gay who was overflowing with big dumb energy. The door swung open, bringing you to jump and be pulled from your motivational speech that was being given inside your head. 

"Come on in. I'm surprised you showed up." Dib stepped aside to let you in, gesturing past the living room to the kitchen where a purple-haired girl sat at a table, picking at the remaining food on her plate. A floating monitor hovered near the table as well. "We're just finishing dinner, but you can follow me if you want." Nodding, you padded behind the social outcast wordlessly, taking a seat next to him at the table. "Gaz, this is Y/n, my partner for my project. Y/n, this is my sister Gaz."

"Hey." You waved to the girl. Her expression remained squinty as she continued to pick at her food, eyes dancing between her plate and a Game Slave which was charging on the counter. 

"Whatever." She grumbled, never even directly acknowledging your existence once. You began to wonder if Dib was actually the most normal out of his entire family, which was saying something. Dib awkwardly cleared his throat as he pointed to the floating monitor, which displayed a man in a lab coat and goggles furiously working on something. 

"Oh, and this is my dad. He's at work right now, like usual. When he can't be with us for dinner, he either videocalls us from his lab or plays a pre-recorded video reminding us of chores and dinner instructions." Despite how sad the things he had just said sounded, not an ounce of bitterness was up for display on his face. Instead, his eyes shone with pride, happy to have a dad who was making a difference in the world, even if he could never really be a conventional father. "Anyway, just let me clean up and then we can get to work." Dib stood up, bringing his own plate over to the sink and running it under water, placing it in in its respective place in the dishwasher afterwards. Waving for you to follow him, he led you down the hall to a room that was clearly his. The door was covered in posters and stickers of aliens and other supernatural creatures, a good sized "Keep Out" sign the centerpiece. You wondered what would be inside, becoming excited. You figured you were the first person besides his own family to be seeing his room. He twisted the knob, casually pushing the door open, allowing you to step inside. 

"Wow..." You trailed off as you glanced around. There was so much to look at. Your eyes darted from one thing to the next, barely able to take it all in. There were several computer monitors surrounding a desk that was littered in papers and catalogues for supernatural hunting items, a few prototypes of possibly his dad's inventions scattered there as well. His room was lined with posters of aliens and other entities, an important looking briefcase thrown haphazardly onto his bed. The one thing that held your gaze the longest was a ginormous cork board. Several photos, drawings, diagrams, and hurried scribbles of notes were tacked up there, filling it to the max. Each paper was connected with color coded strings, things circled in colored pen seemingly at random, although you knew better. It was the definition of organized chaos. In large, bold, red letters, one word was scrawled on a paper at the top of the board: ZIM.

"I'm sorry, I tried to clean it as best I could. It's still kind of a mess." Dib hurriedly stacked papers together on his desk, trying to make it look presentable. 

"It's fine, don't worry about it. You should see my room. Half of my shit isn't even out of boxes yet, and we moved in months ago." You laughed, sitting down on his floor. "So, alien invasion, huh? Isn't Zim that kid with the skin condition?" You asked, gesturing to his cork board. His shoulders tensed as he unplugged his computer and brought it down to the ground, taking a seat beside you.

"Could we just get to work? Please?" He seemed to want to sweep that subject under the rug, and you decided that you would let him.

"Okay...so anyway, this research poster. You got a topic in mind?" Your prompt drew him out of his unsociable shell, albeit hesitantly. 

"Personally, I was thinking Area 51, but if you wanted to do something else..." He genuinely appeared to not want to upset you, despite usually not caring about how he came off to others. 

"That sounds great, Dib. Interesting too. You think they're really hiding aliens there?" Laying down on your stomach, you rested your face in the palms of your hands, gearing up for a long talk. A smile crept onto your face as immediately his eyes lit up.

"I'm glad you asked."

-

"I think we have the essentials. Now we just need to get them onto the poster, which is probably the most time consuming part." Dib stretched his arms towards the ceiling while you yawned and cracked your back. You didn't know how long you had been sitting on the floor for, but a glance to the clock by his bed told you it was 8:01 pm. The two of you had spent the last couple of hours researching, organizing notes, and mainly just talking about yourselves. You had no idea why everyone constantly was ragging on him. You found him to be incredibly interesting and entertaining, hanging onto every single word he spoke. You weren't really sure if you believed in all of these supernatural creatures, but you also didn't think that they couldn't exist. 

"I think so too. You ready to start on the poster now?" Reaching out, you gathered the posterboard and construction paper Dib had brought in from his garage together.

"Yeah, in a minute. I have to use the bathroom and then see what Gaz is up to, I'll be back in a few." You hummed a response, Dib standing up and exiting, closing the door softly behind him. Deciding to take a closer look at the Zim conspiracy board, you pushed yourself to your feet, leaning close to try and decipher the grainy images. One in particular caught your eye. It wasn't in color, and everything seemed fairly blurry. Zim, or what was supposedly Zim, was hunched over something that looked to be a robot. Except, as you looked even closer, Zim seemed to have these buggish eyes and long, skinny antennae in place of his hair. Rubbing your eyes, you flopped down onto Dib's bed.

"God, I must be seeing things." You had managed to convince yourself that you had been staring at computer screens and papers for far too long, and that your eyes were playing tricks on you, showing you what Dib wanted you to see. Closing your eyes for a minute, the rise and fall of your chest turned slow and steady, and you could feel your grip on reality loosening. 

A ringtone of sorts snapped you back from your almost-doze, and at first you thought it was your phone, but after waking up a bit more, you realized it was coming from one of Dib's monitors. It appeared he was getting a call. The monitor showed nothing besides a logo of some sort of eye, as well as an option to accept the call or decline. Filled with curiosity, your feet took you to his desk where his monitor sat. You barely felt in control of your body as your finger swiped at the screen in the direction to accept the call.

"Agent Mothman-" The voice coming through the monitor was distorted, but you got the impression that it was on purpose. The image displayed was a dark silhouette of what seemed to be a man. "You're not Mothman."

"You mean that cryptid from West Virginia? No. I'm not." You took a seat in Dib's desk chair, which was very comfy. You assumed he spent a lot of time in it when he wasn't hanging out with Zim. 

"Who are you and what do you know?" The voice was menacing, and you vaguely wondered if Dib was involved in something more serious than you thought. Quirking an eyebrow, you tried to not let any miniscule amount of fear you were feeling show.

"I'm, we'll just say Agent, uh...Nessie." Feeling uncreative, your mind drifted to the Loch Ness Monster. 

"You're not Nessie either." 

"You got one of those too? Ugh, fine. What about Agent Chupacabra?"

"Well, no, but...you're not any agent we know of."

"But I could be! Agent Chupacabra reporting for duty!" You brought your hand up to your head stiffly in a mock salute.

"But you're not a member of the Swollen Eyeball! What are you doing on Mothman's computer?" 

"The Swollen what now?" You were smiling stupidly, only because you couldn't really grasp what the current situation was. 

"Hey, sorry, Gaz decided to hound me over drinking the last soda, so I took a little longer than I thought-" Dib opened the door to reveal you sitting in his desk chair, trying to look all spooky for the guy in the monitor. You thought he'd laugh at your stupidity, but he was not in the least bit amused. "OH MY GOD AGENT DARK BOOTY!" Slamming his room door, he darted over to where you were sitting, almost tripping and falling on his face. He made a strangled noise as he noticed the disappointed expression that rested on the silhouette's face.

"Who is your little friend, Agent Mothman?" The distorted voice was cold, and you could feel Dib almost shrink next to you.

"Listen, I can explain-"

"I thought we stressed secrecy, and the fact that you are not allowed to have outsiders sit in on our important meetings."

"Meeting?" All of a sudden, several of the other monitors sparked to life, various other silhouettes coming into view. Just in one glance, you could see that Dib wanted nothing more than to fade away into a cloud of space dust in that moment. You stayed silent, knowing that Dib was in some serious trouble because of you.

"We had a meeting at 8:30 pm sharp, Mothman. You knew this. And you had a friend over?" Dib's face, already pale, turned even more so. Any lighter, and you thought for sure he'd become a ghost on the spot. 

"I am so sorry, I had a school project, and he's my partner, I lost track of time." He looked absolutely helpless, and without a word, you stood up and gathered the poster supplies. Snapping back to his senses, he turned to you and began shoving you out of his room and herding you to the front door.

"Dib, I-"

"You really need to go!" There were no other words said between the two of you as he quite literally slammed the door in your face. A sigh slipped past your lips as you clutched your project items in your arms, dragging your feet across the pavement on your walk home. You lazily stumbled through your front door, mumbling a greeting to your parent(s) as you headed to your room, gearing yourself up to finish the project before morning. 

-

"Thank you to Y/n and Dib for their, erm, informative...presentation on Area 51. That was your last one, so enjoy your last five or so minutes of class." Your teacher went back to their desk as you and Dib retreated to your own table. You hadn't talked much since the incident last night, and quite frankly, you were tired from spending hours of your night creating the visual portion of your project. Dib's lips were tightly pressed together in a thin line, and you guessed there was something he wanted to get off his chest. 

"Look, Dib. If there's something you want to say to me, just do it. I'm sorry for answering your call, that was not a good move on my part, and I also apologize for getting you in trouble with your, uh...society." Running a hand through his dark hair, Dib shook his head.

"No, that was my bad. I forgot I had a meeting. I'm also really sorry for kicking you out and then forcing you to finish the project on your own." Your expression softened, unable to resist forgiving him.

"Yeah, that was kind of a dick move." You elbowed him jokingly, hoping he would loosen up now that bygones were bygones.

"No, seriously. How can I make it up to you?" He looked as if he wouldn't be taking no for an answer. He had gotten a taste of what having someone who genuinely enjoyed being around him was like, and he wasn't willing to let that go. A sly grin tugged at your lips, and almost immediately an idea came to mind.

"Consider yourself forgiven if you take me ghost hunting, or whatever it is you do." His shoulders tensed, but relaxed when he realized you weren't making fun of him. 

"Well, you're in luck. I just received a case file investigation last night on a bigfoot lead. I'll pick you up at eight, if that works?" His words were cautious, almost as if he still believed you were phishing.

"It's a date!" You cheered happily, already excited about getting to spend more time with him. A faint blush dusted his cheeks at your wordage.

"Of-Of course." He stammered out, grateful for the bell that rang not even a second after. 

"See you tonight, Dib!" You waved as you made your way home, wanting eight to come as fast as possible.

"He knows the project is over, right?" Torque Smacky raised an eyebrow, questioning Dib and wondering why someone as cool as you would be hanging around with a guy like Dib by choice. 

-

The doorbell rang, and you sprang up from where you sat on the couch, overjoyed to head out. Practically throwing open the door revealed Dib in all of his trench coat glory, albeit a bit nervous looking and sweaty. 

"Alright Mr. Mothman, where are we going?" You grabbed onto his arm, eventually linking it with your own. He cringed at the nickname, but resisted nothing else. 

"To the park. Apparently, some woman saw bigfoot there the other night. Also, fun fact, I saw bigfoot in my garage one time. He was using the belt sander." Your eyes widened, and you immediately realized why everyone called him crazy. You took it upon yourself to believe him. He obviously believed in himself, so why shouldn't you?

"Interesting. You see any other spooks in your time here?" He shrugged as you walked.

"I mean, I think a few ghosts and, well, aliens of course, but we've been over that. Also, I have vague memories of being abducted by aliens as a kid. I think they were trying to experiment on me to create some sort of genius super baby or something." You couldn't help the laughter that tumbled from your mouth. It wasn't necessarily laughing at him, more so that you weren't sure how else to respond. You didn't want to put him down, but at the same time, his story was very out there. And although you weren't 100% on board with the whole supernatural thing, you believed in him and his words. If that was his truth, you would stand by it. "You ever see anything supernatural?" You pointed a finger to yourself, as if to ask, 'me?'. 

"Well, I mean...I did live in West Virginia for a while when I was younger...a lot younger. And then we moved around a lot." Your eyes instinctively narrowed as you tried to recall those times with you and your neighborhood friends. "And, you know, Mothman was like the local legend. He's basically a celebrity down there."

"No way! Did you actually, like, see him?" If you didn't already have it, you sure had his full attention now. 

"No. I believed in him for a while, but we never saw him, and as I got older and distanced myself from there, I just kind of figured it was bullshit. My friends and I, we would go out at night trying to hunt for him with flashlights and stuff. Sometimes we'd bring lamps onto the porch and plug them in, building little 'Welcome, Mothman' forts to sleep in." You chuckled, remembering how much you had believed in all the spookies and specters as a child. 

"That's adorable." Dib's lips were parted in a smile as he continued to lead you deeper into the park. You weren't sure when you had actually gotten there, but you weren't really paying much attention.

"Well, maybe we could do that together some time. I know Mothman isn't really big in this part of the country, but who knows. Maybe he'll come." Softly bumping Dib in the side, you were pleased to see his smile only grow. 

"I'd like that." The nice moment was interrupted by rustling of the trees, and Dib turned on his flashlight, pointing it to the treetops. "There!"

"I thought bigfoot was more on the ground!" You called as you raced after him. You both came to a grinding halt, your feet skidding in the grass to try and avoid ramming straight into Dib's back. The boy you were with aggressively pointed his flashlight into the tree, resulting in a loud hiss from whatever was up there. "Maybe it's just a cat, Dib!" You tried to pull him away, not really liking how riled up he was at the moment.

"Zim! What are you doing here?! What evil things are you planning?" 

"Zim?" You looked upwards, following the beam of the flashlight. Sure enough, there was a green body hunched in a tree branch, a robot of some sort next to him. 

"None of your business, Dib-stink!" Zim spat, turning to face your friend. It was then you got a good look at his face. It wasn't the slightly abnormal one you were used to seeing every day. His eyes were red and buglike, sleek, black antennae sprouting from his head. 

"Holy shit, Dib. You're not crazy." You flicked your flashlight on as well, aiming it at who you thought was your classmate. "He really is an alien!" A strangled cry came from the alien sitting atop the tree branch.

"GIR! Do something!"

"Yes, master!" The once cheerful-looking robot suddenly turned much more serious, dropping down from the branch to where the two of you were standing. You yelped, unsure of what this thing was capable of.

"Relax, his robot is pretty much usele-" Dib began, but his sentence came to an abrupt end when several missals and other weapons emerged from his head. 

"How do you like GIR's new adjustments, Dib? I finally got his behavioral chip fixed to where he's responsive, but not too serious." Zim smirked, and with the point of one of his clawed fingers, his robot was on the two of you. 

Simultaneously, both of you let out a scream, reaching desperately for each other's hands as you ran for your lives back to Dib's place. Your feet pounded the pavement, lungs feeling as if someone was raking knives down your throat and organs, yet despite all that, you both refused to look back. Only when you were on his porch did you feel comfortable sneaking a glace behind you, only to find an empty street lit up by streetlights. Breathing heavily, the two of you leaned on each other for support. Dib looked very worse for wear. He didn't seem to be too athletically inclined. 

"I think...we lost him..." You spoke between gasps for air, grinning all the while. He nodded vigorously, still wheezing. After the two of you had regained your breath, you both managed to catch each other's gaze. You felt every portion of your brain that was in charge of thinking shut down as you leaned in closer to him. You were barely even aware of what you were doing as you pressed your lips to his. His eyes looked as if they were about to burst from his skull, but after a moment, they eased shut as he relaxed into the kiss. You pulled away, feeling heat rush to your cheeks, almost as if your face was on fire. Your stomach was tied in too many knots to even look at Dib, but if you had, you would have seen that he wasn't fairing much better. In fact, he was probably in worse condition. "Thanks for the night of fun, Agent Mothman."

"Uh-huh." He mumbled out, and his brain looked miles away. You decided just to go home before you did or said anything else that could be classified as stupid. As you power-walked away, Dib's hand found its way to his lips, where the feeling and warmth of your own still lingered.

[the-last-magpie]

“Lincopia, You’ve Got Mail” A Ghost Fanfiction, Chapter 2

More rantings, some malice, some phantom of plot, and the Papas are in town. More or less.

Rating: still not M

Genres: General, Humor, Romance, Friendship

Based (mostly) on phone/Whatsapp chats

Hope you enjoy!

-          1.46 am

WhatsApp Lumia/Maery

Lumia: Maery.

Maery: hey

Lumia: Are you hearing this.

Maery: hearing what

Lumia: Like someone is running on the roof?

Maery: don’t hear a thing. why are you up?

Lumia: …because there’s someone on my damn roof?

Maery: probably just mist and air clearing the area

Lumia: ?? Excuse me?

Maery: didn’t you hear that

Lumia: I asked first.

Maery: we are haunted for real

Lumia: No shit Sherlock. We have been haunted since Papa I.

Maery: thanks god elizabeth is gon

Lumia: DON’T SWEAR

Maery: i hated that binch

Lumia: I was talking about god

Maery: better about than to

Lumia: What kind of creatures are we talking about here?

Maery: mh a bit of all

Lumia: Fucking Ghostbusters better be on their way.

Maery: you are aware of the existence of the band Ghost aren’t you

Lumia: Look, I just hate this whole hierarchy thing. Ghouls are always treated better than us. We can’t even know if we have to die because of a ghost or the bitchiest demon in hell.

Maery: unlikely, that just got up from the throne last month

Lumia: I liked Papa II. He was strict. He was smart. He was intimidating. He was tall and handsome.

Maery: a one woman fan club

Lumia: I don’t think so, a lot of people loved him.

Maery: i meant, you could do his whole fan club alone. also sounds like you like to suffer

Lumia: He was very kind to me.

Maery: KIND

Lumia: SHUT UP

   -          2.17 pm

WhatsApp Omega/Alpha

Omega: Are you ready.

Alpha: For what?

Omega: To finally see Air losing his shit.

Alpha: You sat on his keyboard?

Omega: Uhm. Yeah?

Omega: Actually no, I jumped on it.

Alpha: …

Alpha: Why.

Omega: You should have seen it bro. Keys exploded everywhere.

Alpha: A lot like your teeth when you are going to tell him. Again, why?

Omega: I fell.

Alpha: I made my best to understand logics and physics of this. I have no idea why someone would fall on a freaking keyboard.

Omega: I was… let’s just say I was dusting cobwebs from the beams?

Alpha: Of course. Look, just make sure to be at the rehearsal. We won’t have any piano, but who cares, it’s not like Meliora has a shit tons of it in it.

Omega: It’s not that much…

Alpha: Absolution is gonna sound so flat man.

Omega: I’m going to cry for it then. Eh eh. You got it.

Alpha: This was the cringiest thing I ever heard.

Omega: I’ll dust the piano down in the dungeon.

Alpha: Make sure to tell Papa of that, so he can slam the door right behind you and then throw the key.

Omega: He loves me.

Alpha: Yeah. Must be that the reason why he suddenly forget how to crack a smile when you enter a room.

Omega: This Emerituses are so butt hurt. You can never joke around them.

Alpha: This would be the third idiocy you throw at him man.

Omega: Excuse me? And what would the second be? Also first time I was very much justified.

Alpha: Maybe that one time you loudly whistled at him to get his attention?

Omega: HE WAS VERY FAR AWAY IN THE HALLWAY.

Alpha: YOU DON’T FUCKING WHISTLE AT A POPE. I SAW THE SKIES DARKENING.

Omega: Alright, I’ll behave. You know, it’s not that easy of a moment. Every new papacy is hard for everyone of us. We have to learn anew how to comunicate with them.

Alpha: I’ll give you a tip in this troubling times: shut your trap.

Omega: Thanks dad.

   Mitra was essentially a nosy person. Just pretending to mind her business, most of the time she appeared collected, diligent, and to some extent extremely bored. That was the reason why, when confronted with something out of the ordinary or simply suspiciously odd, she completely lose it.

Looking out from the second floor of the cloister, almost hidden behind a column, she peered below to look better at black vestments now almost familiar. That wasn’t the only thing she was seeing: the owner of said vestments was almost giving her his back, a back where two entwined hands met, shaping an embrace. Mitra stared, searching for details: the other person seemed to be a woman. There was the hint of a black and white tunic, with a large skirt that almost reached the ground. At a movement, a shoe came into view, and she recognized the bright yellow, another familiar signature of a very specific person. When this woman seemed to wrap more tightly one of her arms around the pope, she rested her head on his shoulder, a really contented, gentle smile on her lips brightening her angular features.

Mitra suppressed a gasp and very quietly moved away from the edge of the balcony, comically pursing her lips.

She now had some gossip to share.

   -          12.36 pm

WhatsApp Chat Group: Feels Ya Sista

Mitra: LADIES i just saw Fairy Feet with Papa!!

Ambrosia: what do you mean by that?

Rita: OH NO

Lumia: Is this nsfw?

Rita: OH NO

Rita: NO NO NO DAMMIT I HAD TO BE THE FIRST

Valeriana: HEY CALM DOWN YOU GREMLINS

Mitra: it wasn’t nsfw but maybe it is at closed doooooors

Maery: who cares

Ambrosia: you are being vague, what did you see?

Rita: I WAITED LONG ENOUGH

Valeriana: Rita I’m going to kick you out of the group. You unholy little shit.

Maery: why all this fuss papa II fucked half the women in here

Maery: and honestly i thought III was gay

Maery: have you seen him moving his hands that’s totally gay

Mitra: she was embracing him, very INTIMATELY

Ambrosia: that doesn’t makes sense

Lumia: These are the times when I see clearly how tired we all are.

Ambrosia: what kind of public embrace is so intimate to suggests that kind of relationship

Maery: maybe she was grabbing his ass

Valeriana: This conversation is hands down killing me, oh my god I’m snorting, you goblins

Lumia: Ok but what about Imperator? If she finds out…

Ambrosia: You’re taking this for a fact, it’s probably just Mitra imagination

Mitra: DO YOU WANT TO BET?

Maery: i bet he gay

Valeriana: hfhgkdksh

Lumia: What about bi? SISTERS I’M TELLING YOU ALL I’M SIGNING UP FOR THE HAREM THIS TIME

Lumia: I LOST MY CHANCE LAST TIME, IT’S NOT GONNA HAPPEN AGAIN

Lumia: Can you imagine an harem with a bi Papa? HHHHH EVERYONE FOR EVERYONE

Valeriana: I’m so tempted to invite Imperator in here, you have no idea, I would die seeing you all implode from shame

Maery: what a party buster

Valeriana: I just long for unlimited fun.

Ambrosia: I’m not betting, good for her if it’s the truth

Rita: i’m taking my chance tonight.

Ambrosia: oh for fuck’s sake…

Mitra: WELL I’m going to investigate.

Valeriana: Good, see if you can find a couple of minute for work too while you’re on that

Lumia: Eheheheh

—

Chaos: …what the hell happened in here?

   WhatsApp Chat Group: Ghouls with the Most

Alpha: Family reunion.

Earth: what’s up?

Alpha: We need to figure out things. And honestly, I need the advice of my brothers.

Omega: Someone has to inform Mist @KittyKat

Air: I will be there.

Omega: We didn’t even decide time and place Air

Air: I will be there.

Omega: ‘k.

Water: What’s the matter?

Alpha: The same as last papacy. Assessment of the new Papa.

Omega: Well looks like there’s indeed a lot of ass in there.

Earth: lmaoooo

Water: What’s there to asses? He’s… fine. I mean, I don’t have that much of a problem with him.

Alpha: Look, we did the same for Papa II, and I understand that that was war zone, but I can’t figure out this dude. At least II was an old grumpy bastard and that was it. I don’t know what to make of him. He seemed so ready to be all over us with that first supper thing together last month, and then he disappeared. One moment he is all kindness and jokes and the next he raises a fist. I don’t understand what runs through that head.

Earth: ??? did he struck someone?

Alpha: It was a metaphor

Water: Are we discussing it now, here?

Alpha: No. I was just stating what troubles me.

Omega: Bro, it’s not that difficult. You piss him off, like I do, you get a stern look. You do your job, he pats you on the back.

Alpha: Doesn’t look that clear to me. Also weren’t you complaining the exact same way just last week?

Omega: I took your advice.

Special: I’ll tell Mist @OHmega. But, Alpha, actually I think you should go talk to him personally if these are the facts.

Alpha: I’m not saying I have troubles with him. Also I want to understand if it’s just me, or if he really is shady.

Earth: this doesn’t sound very good bro

Water: Should we present this to the other group chat? Maybe the other ghouls have some problems of their own

Alpha: I DON’T HAVE PROBLEMS WITH HIM

Air: Sounds like you do.

Alpha: Damn

Omega: Look, let’s just grab a cold one and crack it open over a nice chat all together. I could use some brothership… in this troubling times.

Alpha: You are so sensitive.

Omega sent  00083546589_22_nop.jpeg  to Ghouls with the Most

Earth: lol

Water: So? When and where?

Alpha: Tonight, 10 pm, rooftop terrace. @Lowmega very mature.

Omega: You know I love you.

Earth: gayyyy

Omega: Well, I am.

Air: I’ll be there.

Omega: Thanks for your contribution Air.

   Message from: Loose Ass (received at 5.35 pm)

Hey. Sorry to disturb, but actually not sorry. I tried to call you. Obviously you didn’t pick up. I need some intel on those assholes. If you can find some time to answer between a daiquiri and an heart attack I’d be very glad.

Message from: Loose Ass (received at 7.17 pm)

Of course you’re not answering.

Message from: Loose Ass (received at 7.59 pm)

Just call me when you’re free.

Message from: Bald Hitler (9.03 pm)

Get lost.

Incoming call from LOOSE ASS…

Missed call from LOOSE ASS.

Message from: Loose Ass (received at 9.05 pm)

Pick. The Fuck. Up.

Incoming call from LOOSE ASS…

 “What?”

“Hallelujah. Shouldn’t your blood pressure be lower while on vacation?”

“I’m perfectly calm. It just sounded like some strings remained attached. It is your problem now.”

“I’m not asking you to do the homework, genius. I just want you to answer a very simple question.”

“And that is?”

“Do you trust them?”

“…I wouldn’t trust them with an empty gun. Are they giving you troubles?”

“No. Not yet. But I’m going to.”

“What?”

“Since I have been elected some weights have shifted. I already knew they were backstabbing bastards, but I’ve never seen so many teeth and flashing smiles in all my life. It felt like Hollywood, but more on the side of Sharkwood.”

“Don’t make a mess. Don’t do stupid things.”

“Worried?”

“What the fuck do you think.”

“I’m not. I’m not going to turn the Church inside out. Just wanna open some windows for stale air.”

“Can you wait until I come back?”

“I don’t need you to babysit me—”

“For advices. That’s what you wanted, no? I’m going to take High Priest role after all. If you are going to make a mess at least I want to witness it with my own two eyes.”

“Look. There’s no way for me to do anything in a couple of week. I’ll need a couple of months probably. To… see through things. And then probably another couple to make some plans. And then another couple—”

“I GET IT, you need time. When I’m back we are going to have a chat… Sven was really too kind to you, you spoiled brat…”

“Why complain, we had our father to counteract that.”

“You don’t know a fraction of that.”

“These are the kind of arguments that always get us in a fight. Let’s just drop it.”

“I’ll be back in a week. Don’t do stupid things.”

“Don’t die over white stripes.”

“Idiot.”

“Venom-spitting butthole.”

“Loose ass.”

“AH!”

“It’s true.”

“See you at the gate.”

“ahAH!”

“I’m short but I can beat your ass.”

“I’ll see you in a week big baby.”

“Are you hanging up on m—”

 Call ended