#I literally don't remember which tag
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YES HELLO ASK GAME FOR GAVIN REED
♥!
I can't say my opinions on Gavin will be truly hot takes but here they are anyway.
1: sexuality headcanon
Gavin clearly has the largest crushes on so many people around him and none of those people are women, so while I won't rule out that he might be attracted to women, I imagine he's mostly into men/masculine presenting people.
2: otp
Uh honestly I literally never think about Gavin and shipping in terms of pairings I actually like so... I guess I can say that the fandom take on Gavin and RK900 has some dynamics I like? It can definitely be made to work, it's just that it's an inherently fandom ship in not just the pairing, but in RK900's entire personality (whether or not Gavin is fandomized or given his canon personality.) So it's really hard for me to actually ship it, but in terms of fun dynamics I appreciate in otps, it counts.
3: brotp
The relationship between fandom Gavin and Tina gives me life and I love it. The two of them being terribly chaotic BFFs has been one of my favorite fanon things, even in like, fics and such where they're not the focus but are just being menaces in the background. It's beautiful and I love them.
4: notp
Gavin and Connor. Starts off terribly and I don't think their personalities would be well suited together even if you're using fanon Gavin instead of canon Gavin. In social situations Connor tends to flip flop from extremely passive to overly aggressive and both of those would be absolutely terrible when mixed with Gavin's bullying and insecurity, and also their canon relationship being as it is I just hate everything about this pairing.
5: first headcanon that pops into my head
It's barely even headcanon since it's basically canon anyway but Gavin constantly gets himself into situations he has no idea how to get out of. I imagine he liked to pick a lot of fights, some relatively minor and some serious, when he was younger and then instantly was in over his head in all of them.
6: favorite line from this character
I'm too lazy to go willingly seek out Gavin content but the line in the Eden Club where he's talking derisively about the guy who Echo killed always stands out to me. Gavin hates androids but he also has an utter disdain for the sorts of people who frequent Eden Club and I think that's an interesting little character bit.
7: one way in which I relate to this character
We are both small and angry, though Gavin's still a hundred miles taller than me, so in a way I'm really winning the small and angry contest here. Also the extreme urge to make bitchy comments every five seconds is very much relatable, though Gavin hasn't yet learned the art of NOT making those comments every time you think about them.
8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character
He's trying SO HARD to be tough and impressive and he's just like, the lamest dude and on one hand that's very funny but on the other I'm so embarrassed for him. Him showing off for Tina in Waiting for Hank by bullying Connor while Tina is just like, completely stone faced is one of the funniest background things to me.
9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?
Not even a problematic fave since I hardly ever think about him, but he is problematic. So problematic. But I do love that even his biggest fans know he's a complete disaster and I don't believe anyone anywhere would ever call him a cinnamon roll.
#detroit become human#ask and answer#gavin reed#dbh gavin#I literally don't remember which tag#I use for him#which I think says a lot
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Wild how we know that Elizabeth Woodville was officially appointed to royal councils in her own right during her husband’s reign and fortified the Tower of London in preparation of a siege while 8-months pregnant and had forces gathering at Westminster “in the queen’s name” in 1483 – only for NONE of these things to be even included, let alone explored, in the vast majority of scholarship and historical novels involving her.
#lol I don't remember writing this - I found it when I was searching for something else in my drafts. But it's 100% true so I had to post it.#elizabeth woodville#my post#Imo this is mainly because Elizabeth's negative historiography has always involved both vilification and diminishment in equal measure.#and because her brand of vilification (femme fatale; intriguer) suggests more indirect/“feminine” than legitimate/forceful types of power#It's still bizarre though-you'd think these would be some of the most famous & defining aspects of Elizabeth's life. But apparently not#I guess she only matters when it comes to marrying Edward and Promoting Her Family and scheming against Richard#There is very lacking interest in her beyond those things even in her traditionally negative depictions#And most of her “reassessments” tend to do diminish her so badly she's rendered utterly irrelevant and almost pathetic by the end of it#Even when some of these things *are* mentioned they're never truly emphasized as they should be.#See: her formal appointment in royal councils. It was highly unconventional + entirely unprecedented for queens in the 14th & 15th century#You'd think this would be incredibly important and highlighted when analyzing late medieval queenship in England but apparently not#Historians are more willing to straight-up INVENT positions & roles for so many other late medieval queens/king's mothers that didn't exist#(not getting into this right now it's too long...)#But somehow acknowledging and discussing Elizabeth's ACTUAL formally appointed role is too much for them I guess#She's either subsumed into the general vilification of her family (never mind that they were known as 'the queen's kin' to actual#contemporaries; they were defined by HER not the other way around) or she's rendered utterly insignificant by historians. Often both.#But at the end of the day her individual role and identity often overlooked or downplayed in both scenarios#and ofc I've said this before but - there has literally never been a proper reassessment of Elizabeth's role in 1483-85 TILL DATE#despite the fact that it's such a sensational and well-known time period in medieval England#This isn't even a Wars of the Roses thing. Both Margaret of Anjou and Margaret Beaufort have had multiple different reassessments#of their roles and positions during their respective crises/upheavals by now;#There is simply a distinct lack of interest in reassessing Elizabeth in a similar way and I think this needs to be acknowledged.#Speaking of which - there's also a persistent habit of analyzing her through the context of Margaret of Anjou or Elizabeth of York#(either as a parallel or a foil) rather than as a historical figure in HER OWN RIGHT#that's also too long to get into I just wanted to point it out because I hate it and I think it's utterly senseless#I've so much to say about how all of this affects her portrayal in historical fiction as well but that's going into a whole other tangent#ofc there are other things but these in particular *really* frustrate me#just felt like ranting a bit in the tags because these are all things that I want to individually discuss someday with proper posts...
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the great thing about falling really deep into a new media niche is developing opinions on many new things. the terrible thing about falling really deep into a new media niche is developing opinions on many new things
#fjdkfdjkfd.#anyway. last week a trailer came out for something only called kidnap. which is hilarious because that's a blocked tumblr tag#it's a romance (with the kidnapper. who is secretly only doing it to pay a medical bill). i don't think it sounds or looks very good#& considering who is airing this and their history with Edgy Content the keyword here will probably be Bland. or maybe Toothless#but unfortunately...... tragically...... one of the leads is an actor i'll take in literally anything.#so i've spent my week periodically being attacked by this insignificant bit of knowledge and experiencing shrimp emotions#literally just. going about my day. thinking 'kidnap'. going OOF. then remembering i'm in the middle of brushing my teeth#also. i found out the original writer of bad romance & together with me is ALSO the writer of not me. and it's things like this#that would take like. twenty layers of explanation of these properties in general and also my takes on them specifically#and how it contrasts or aligns with their general perception. to even come CLOSE to explaining the mental hit i took from that#i need a corkboard and some red thread. and then probably three more corkboards#for day 1 that is. i think i have a week's worth of loosely connected spontaneous deep dive video essays i could do off the top of my head#ah well. the curse of having interests#*
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My first attempt at writing that's vaguely like poetry: from a dragon
I am not what you think.
I walk around, awkward limbs and flighty mannerisms, and you think I’m strange. You have no idea how strange you would think I am if you only saw what was underneath.
Underneath, I am a creature of the ocean. Something that could never pass as human, and no longer wants to. Saltwater rushes through my veins in secret, silent to everyone but me. To me, it’s a roaring sound of the waves that I have never seen except for within my soul. It yearns to dissolve into the ocean like it could long ago, but for now those days are over and I am hidden underneath skin and muscle.
Underneath, there are wings; fins; antlers. They ache to tear from my back, through my skull. Nonetheless, they stay hidden for me, safe in the silence. Protected like I protected my kin in a lifetime so close to the surface and yet unreachable. Wrapped in a form that no longer coils around them like a serpent, but keeps them hidden from predators well enough I suppose.
I suppose.
I accept my form reluctantly and do what I can to make it mine. I shape it to feel better when I discover my gender, and when I can’t shape it to fit my true self I cover it in things that feel a little more like home. A little more draconic. A little more like the ocean that I never have seen, but feel homesick for anyway.
I do find joy in being in this body, at least. Out there, there are others. Angels working minimum wage, dragons sitting on a park bench, wolves buying groceries. We hide, but we do so to be free. We walk through crowds, and no one notices our scales and fur and feathers. But we do. We see each other, even if from miles away, and we see what’s underneath.
And underneath, none of us are what you think.
(Tags for side commentary/context)
#not looking for even constructive criticism since this is literally my first ever writing that isn't fiction or just a vague ramble#at least the first that I finished#I'm not calling it poetry bc that feels too fancy#this is a ramble that's shaped like poetry#because I'm such an open book type of person to the point that some people have called me “so brave for being open” about things#which I still genuinely don't understand bc bro I'm just talking about being autistic and queer and shit like if you had issues with that#I would tell you to fight me#but that aside#it's become an issue that I can't talk about my otherkinity irl to most people#like it'd be unsafe and all that jazz#so this was sort of about that#and sort of just a general exploration of my draconity for fun#and sort of a shoutout to the otherkin community for making me feel normal about it#bc otherwise I'd feel like a freak and be miserable right about now#otherkin#alterhuman#nonhuman#dragonkin#otherkin blog#otherkinity#therian#otherkin community#amphitere kin#it feels too dramatic or smth but that's just the tone I write this type of shit in so???? ehhhh fuck it#I'm not looking to make GOOD writing#I'm looking to write that's it#(also I'm not fishing for compliments in the slightest I'm legit writing that down so my ADHD ass remembers to not judge my writing later)#not sure if i should tag a tw but like#body horror tw#? I think?
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So I read A Stitch in Time and one result of that which I was certainly not expecting was that I feel so much sympathy for Enabran Tain. Garak's life is a tragedy, but Tain's is a fucking black comedy.
I mean, he's a terrible person and an absolute shitbag, but can you imagine? You have this kid. You go to all the trouble of arranging for him to be raised in a family situation where he won't be rejected from society for being your bastard. You get him into the nicest indoctrination school where he can hobnob with plenty of uppercrust kids. You get him a job in your Order and all the proper training. And he's actually, like, really good at it. But he has this fatal flaw of being completely incapable of not making stupid, short-sighted, emotional decisions.
A scene I imagine has to have happened just prior to Garak and Tain's confrontation at the end of part II:
Like goddamn. When Tain asked "what's your plan for getting rid of her husband?" and Garak's just like "plan what plan." Dude. I'M disappointed, I can only imagine the guy who's job it is to know and plan for everything isn't at least as disappointed.
I know he didn't actually, but do you think there was ever a time when Tain wanted to be like, You know what. Just go back to Tolan and become a gardener. Join that illegal hippie cult. It's fine.
#enabran tain#<tagging mostly in case anyone has him blocked bc i get it.#a stitch in time#elim garak#ds9 the garyalmore rewatch#(obviously not technically part of the rewatch but that's mostly a timing tag for organizing my opinions)#can't believe this is the second time i've compared tain to a character from teen wolf. BUT IT WONT BE THE LAST#I was reading apolesen's fantastic Love in a Time of Oppression and for some reason it made me remember a fic i read last year by#GoddessofBirth called There Are Many Names in History (but none of them are ours). which. yeah that's probably bc of the doomed nature of#a prequel romance. but also Chris Argent and Garak both win the 'i'm sorry your dad is the literal worst' award. Anyway I've always felt#like I *should* get a Tywin Lannister vibe off of Tain. like this is the guy who orchestrated the red wedding. who fucked up his kids so ba#he died from it. But I don't. I can definitely agree to a Gerard Argent vibe though. The 'you though you were laying out some kind of#dynasty but in actuality your son is a better person than you and everything you have ever striven for has been undone' sort of vibe
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modern trek erasing mccoy is genuinely my villain origin story
#mine#i just remembered how terribly mccoy was treated in into darkness again#and how the changes they made fully cut out the katra of it all#i mean they literally had not established the kirk + spock friendship enough to even make the story make sense at that point#they were fully leaning on tos and the pop culture history of it but they didn't EARN it at ALL#meanwhile they HAD established the kirk + mccoy friendship and they didn't even have mccoy in the goddamn room#unlike tos which of course had spock have his moment with mccoy BEFORE he goes in (and then of course the katra)#also i haven't watched SNW (and likely won't) but the fact they haven't had mccoy on there.................#anyway. it's. just. Interesting. is all.#[powering up my comically large supervillain ice ray]#(also let's not even talk about the certain segments of fandom that do it too lmao y'all know who you are)#i am too sleepy to be writing this so i am not putting it in the tags i'm positive it's bitchier than i mean it to be i'm just. v annoyed.#lol. lmao even. giggling cutely as i sharpen my knife. don't. erase. the doctor.
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Realization.
#etrian odyssey#moe once again picking names on a whim LMFAOOO (first instance was. itself. and it just keeps doing this.)#I HAD TO. MAKE THIS. i had to give the sheep a name so bad upon learning this.#also i think one thing that's really important to remember about sharena and her core character#is that she's a weird girl at heart.#like i think she makes the same mistake i did (thinking kuro is a plushie) and is enthusiastic about it anyway#LIKE. sharena is a concentionally attractive literal princess weird girl. she flies under the radar#bc of those first two things (and also is given more grace/weird traits could even be romantised BECAUSE#she's pretty. high status too)#someone like moe. on the other hand. maybe there was a time it was considered close enough#to conventional attractiveness. but it's deviated so far from that One (1) societal expectation#that now it's more ostracized. its weird traits are no longer packaged in something pretty.#it's no longer desirable. it's un-romantisizable. which makes its traits more unpalatable.#it's... an aquired taste. some might say.#also i can't fucking get over the fact that moe looks like a fucking gnome in that hat LMFAOOOOOOOO#SOMETHING ABOUT THAT SPECIFIC HAT SHAPE AND THE FACIAL HAIR...... IT'S SO GNOMECORE.......#i'm gonna cry. moe. you got gnome'd. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#sharena#moe tag#my art#don't. mind the typos in here btw i'm not fixing that.#ALSO TECHNICALLY FE??? but also it's such a rough sketch idk if it matters??????#also primarily eo????#well.#fire emblem#feh#moe is. technically a summoner oc as well.#i feel like we're so far removed here i'm not tagging it LMFAOOO
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I read Possession by AS Byatt after people told me "if you liked Gaudy Night you'll like this" and WELL.
Warning- spoilers for both books abound below!
So it sounded great- as a lapsed academic (though not in the field of literature by any means) there's a part of me that loves reading about academia because it's full of such obsessive people, and this book seemed to be exactly that and so I was excited.
Then I read it, and on the one hand, my first thought was "all these people are dull as heck, the only sane modern-day one is Val, and at the end of the day the historical stuff is just two people having an affair, who cares." My second thought was "there's just enough stuff here that makes me think that maybe the author knows that all of this is stupid, like the fact that Val is obviously one of the few sane ones here." But the ending made me doubt even that. Essentially, and I say this even as that lapsed academic, the author could not convince me to care about the important things at stake here, and as a result couldn't get me to care about the people who only seemed to care about those things.
I didn't care about Ash and LaMotte- they came across as two people high on their own supply who had a tawdry affair. (And each of them is the less interesting person, as a person, than their official partner!) As a result of not caring about them, I couldn't POSSIBLY care about Roland, Maud, and the rest of their crew, because their only functions were to be possessed by, and weirdly possessive of, these two entirely unworthy individuals, whose in-universe historical and literary significance Byatt couldn't convince me of, and to use that possession as a mirror for their own very lame romance. Beyond that they're utterly uninteresting, and there isn't even meant to BE much beyond that so it's not that surprising.
Anyway, I didn't like this book much, but it still made me think a lot. And there's a way in which a certain kind of person might say "well if it made you think then that's surely a sign of some positive quality" and... maybe? I don't know. I didn't hate all of it, and some parts were interesting, and I do have a whole separate list of things about the book that bug me including a breakdown of some of the book's (perceived by me) themes that I particularly disliked lol. Perhaps I'll post it another time. So I guess you can say it spurred me to thought, but loads of things that I don't like do that, and the only positive thing that that draws from me is that they're not downright dull.
The thing is, after finishing the book I was immediately struck by that "if you like Gaudy Night..." element, because it has a situation that felt weirdly similar (if for totally different reasons)- a young scholar stealing a letter from a library/archive. The circumstances are different- in Gaudy Night, the scholar does it to hide its existence so as not to contradict his thesis, and in Possession, the scholar does it so as to explore the document further, though still secretly- but there are still some interesting parallels vis a vis class. Possession goes into the class thing more than Gaudy Night does, but neither book goes much into it- the scholar is lower-class and someone who has scraped their way to their position, and is encumbered by a female partner of lower social and academic standing, and in the end they are juxtaposed against scholars who come from an elevated class and who have more money and opportunity. In Gaudy Night, Arthur Robinson is judged by the likes of Lord Peter Wimsey and a college full of women who don't have to do anything but think, teach, write, and grade papers; in Possession, Roland has to convince a bunch of academics of standing and resources to take a chance on him (and while this is more about money than class, he's the main one who's like "maybe it's good if Lady Bailey gets her wheelchair"). Byatt elides over this at the end by having him magically become in demand and on his way to achieving his academic goals, but I think in both books, the class element really could have taken on more significance in the text.
(I'd add as well that Byatt pits the upper-class and moneyed Maud, who of course is doing things for "the right reasons," vs the evil American businessman who clearly... doesn't care about Ash enough? Despite how much he clearly and obviously cares about Ash? The book was way more interesting when he seemed like a valid rival to the British team, who only thought that they deserved the letters more because of their obsession, rather than how it turned out at the end where the American dude is an actual cartoon villain. What made him genuinely less worthy besides having money without class, and of course having the bad taste to be American? What makes one scholar's possession more justified? Sayers was never this unsubtle.)
So that made me think more about Possession vs Gaudy Night, and the thing is, there are actual living people in Gaudy Night! Say what you will about the unworldliness of the academics at Shrewsbury, but you get a very keen view of their personalities by the end, even as they are (by necessity given the rules of their world) subsumed by academia, or subsume themselves in it. And the people who do fall in love are REALLY in love, and you understand why...
And somehow a book from 1935 feels far more interrogative of the possession (or lack thereof) found in love and romance, and just about the place of women in academia and relationships overall, than one from the late 80s. In Gaudy Night, Harriet accepts Peter once she has determined that despite their power differential (brought on by class, money, history, and to a degree gender) he will not threaten her personhood, because he has proven himself to her. In Possession, Maud accepts Roland because she has the power (money, class, position, even height) and so Roland actually cannot threaten her- and yet still that final scene is about her being taken by him, basically to prove some kind of a point. In contrast, in Busman's Honeymoon, the euphemistic sex scenes are about Peter trying to please Harriet.
When I say it's to prove a point, I'm paraphrasing Byatt, incidentally- who said: "And in the case of Maud I had made it very inhibiting. She was a woman inhibited both by beauty (which actually isn't very good for very beautiful women because they feel it isn't really them people love) and she was also inhibited by Feminism, because she had all sorts of theories that perhaps she would be a more noble kind of woman if she was a lesbian. And so she was a bit stuck. And Roland was timid because I am naturally good at timid men. It's the kind of men I happen to like. He's a timid thinking man, so of course it took him the whole book." I mean... yikes, but also that explains a lot. Maud can only bring herself to be with a man who is weak/effeminate (?) enough to justify whatever weird psyche Byatt has imagined up for her, but still she needs to get over her inhibitions and under him because... reasons. I don't know.
(Height is also interesting here as a point of contrast- Byatt makes Maud taller than Roland to make a point about how on the one hand she retains the power but on the other hand there is now even more of her that has to surrender. Peter and Harriet are the same medium height and wear the same size gown.)
I think the thing that most stuns me is how regressive Possession feels when it comes to gender politics on relationships than Gaudy Night does. I'd need a whole other post to talk about this, but the theme of Possession seems to me to be "relationships that produce things (whether art or children) are worth more than ones that don't." Roland is better with Maud than with Val because Val is a second rate scholar who drags him down (while supporting him financially) and Ash is better with LaMotte than with Ellen because LaMotte didn't only inspire his writing (Ellen's contributions are described only in the negative "didn't impede"), she gave him the child that Ellen refused to. Incidentally, in both cases it's the man pursuing a relationship that will give HIM something... But, to paraphrase Peter in Busman's Honeymoon, one wouldn't want to regard relationships in that agricultural light. Gaudy Night is about how two people can produce great things without each other but choose to be with each other for their own, and each other's, happiness. They aren't each less apart, and as I noted in a prior post, they don't need to solve cases together or conjoin their work in order for their relationship to be worth something. It is worth it for them to be together because it encourages some kind of inner balance within them and between them, as people. They enjoy collaborating but that is by no means the basis of their love (and, incidentally, I think that a lot of, if not most, detective series romances fail this basic test of "would they have fallen in love if they were accountants who met on a dating app." Peter and Harriet definitely would have- would, say, Albert Campion and Amanda Fitton have? I do NOT think so).
And here's the thing- another reason why Byatt's quote above is so off-putting is that it makes it clear that not only in the text but on a meta level, the purpose of the relationships is to prove a Point. I found Roland and Maud to have zero chemistry, and honestly I was expecting them to get together 3/4 of the way through and split up at the end when it turned out they had nothing in common- it seemed like that kind of book. I was kind of stunned when they only got together at the end in an "it's meant to be" way because nothing about it seemed meant to be. They were stuck together by that one thing and they each apparently needed the relationship for some kind of self-actualization or historical rhyming or other. (Whatever I say about Ash and LaMotte... at least they seemed to like each other!)
Peter and Harriet... they get together because they love each other. Do they change over the course of Gaudy Night, and over the course of the other books they share together? Of course they do. But if it makes sense, I'll put it this way- Harriet doesn't accept Peter's proposal as proof that she got over her hangups, Harriet gets over her hangups so that she can accept Peter's proposal. Her hangups only matter because they were keeping her from this particular kind of happiness- she was a fully actualized person even with them. She is a person who does things for human reasons so that she can build a mutually happy life with the person she loves, not a little plot mannequin being moved around in order to tell the author's desired Message. People can say what they want about Gaudy Night and its flaws, but despite the intricacies of its construction, nobody can call the characters' actions and motivations anything but brutally human.
Whether within their universes or on a meta level, the books have SUCH different things to say about the value and nature of love, the place of and purpose of sex, the place of art and intellectual accomplishment in relationships, all of the above in the context of femininity… and I can't help but feel that each time, Gaudy Night wins the contest. It's possible I'm missing something major about Possession, and maybe sometime I'll post the rest of my notes about the things I disliked and people can tell me what I'm wrong about- but if nothing else it made me appreciate Gaudy Night even more, so for that I'm grateful.
#possession#as byatt#gaudy night#dorothy l sayers#lord peter wimsey#harriet vane#i'm not tagging all the characters from possession bc i don't actually really remember their full names and i'm too lazy to look them up#I also saw recs for possession for “if you like jonathan strange and mr norrell” and “if you like jfsp s9”#for jonathan strange and mr norrell i actually have several Thoughts#and am happy to share if asked#but i'm perplexed by the jfsp comparison#though a reading of ellen ash as asexual vs uncle newt would be...interesting#i guess it's based on romances contrasted through time?#also- i've seen people claim that possession is satire#to which i say#BS!!!!#the way that book is written either literally every word of it is satire and none of it is meant to be taken seriously#or it's serious as gospel#the only bits where some parts felt like they might be meant to be “satirical” in relation to other parts#came across more as caricature than anything else#cough cough lesbian feminist american professor... i mean jeez#which reminds me#any future writing i do about why i disliked possession#will have to include my take on that thing some women writers do where they're really WEIRD about how they write women#(sexually but in a way that they THINK is clinical to the point of objectivity)#while barely even describing what the men look like#and not having the women be physically attracted to them#another contrast point with sayers actually#who is perfectly prepared to have harriet be physically attracted to peter
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#not gonna make a real post but i gotta vent a little#there was that one poll abt which DA man has the most annoying fans#which i did not vote in bc as someone who values my own sanity i don't hang out in tags of characters that get on my nerves#but i'm just dumb enough to have looked in the notes and apparently solas was sweeping i guess#which by itself is whatever#but then the tags were just dozens of ppl complaining that solas fans were annoying bc they *checks notes*#post about solas a lot???#and 'flood the lavellan tag'? you know...the only character you can romance him with w/o a mod???#and they hate that we're 'acting like DA4 is going to only be abt him'...you know. the game originally called 'dreadwolf'#idk my guys i get that if someone jumps on your post and makes it abt a character u hate that's annoying#but it sure sounds like ur just bitching abt ppl having fun in their own fandom space#this sounds very much like a YOU issue#like i remember someone literally made a post like 'UGH why do Solavellans even like him?!' that ended up on my dash#and I answered in good faith not feeling like i was being mean or aggressive#and i promptly got yelled at for 'not staying in my lane'#my brother in Christ YOU asked MY part of the fandom a question#Not saying there aren't Solas fans w/ Rancid Takes but i swear half the complaints i see are people just mad that we're having a good time#curate your own online experience guys it's not that hard#i waited 10 years for closure with this dumpster fire man#and no one is going to spoil my fun about it#block me to the moon and back idc
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Seeing Kafka in overtly revealing ("sexy") dresses in fan arts: I just... don't see why? Me over here: The most 'revealing' thing that I can imagine her in, if I envision her without a coat draped over her shoulders, is something like this. Am I just weird; where am I supposed to see this 'overtly revealing' nature of hers that oozes 'sexy'? That woman has class, and in that, I think she's sexy (f I have to use the word). And where do I get that impression from? Her entire default attire screams it at me from the rooftops.
#[ mini study. ] she must have sought something extraordinary. everything she does comes at a great cost.#[ class. class. /class/. ]#[ she's refined. everything from how she walks; to her mannerisms; to how she phrases her sentences. all of it plays into it. ]#[ that's also /why/ she's so good at unnerving everyone in my opinion; it's because she has a certain stature to her. ]#[ i swear. she wears high-waist shorts. yes. but can we remember that the /high waist/ element is very important? ]#[ that was literally an element in the 1960s when these shorts became more mainstream to counteract the concept... ]#[ of bare legs. ensuring the waist was covered. even if with high-waist; the waist gets cinched which is inherently an 'attractive' thing.#[ yes. ]#[ but still; that keeps her shorts also within a realm of some semblance of attire conservatism/classiness. ]#[ and then out of everything she could 'collect'-- it's COATS. ]#[ an item of clothing that is often the first thing we judge a person by; and often is tied to perception/judgement of elegance. ]#[ sophistication and even a level of... professionalism. and if we look at public figures-- we often account status by their presentation.#[ or hell; their sense of style. and the first element of someone's presentation is often derived from their coat. ]#[ i feel like i need to stuff this post into the longer meta tag as well for sheer reference for myself. but i just!!! ]#[ i hate the super overtly fan arts of her. i don't understand where this perception comes from. ]#[ meta. ] the mara's tether is firmly in her grasp. she will not pull upon it before the designated time; nor shall she relinquish it.
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I'm sure other queer people will relate, but I always get apprehensive around The Talk (as in, non-queer people talking about queerness in the abstract), and that's the topic my shul decided to land on today during lunch. And I feel so fortunate to have found them first because they were talking about a previous member and how they want him to visit and they want his boyfriend to visit so they can all scramble to feed and welcome him. I'm imagining a hoard of people just shoveling food at this member and his boyfriend if (and hopefully when) they decide to visit 😭
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#shul shenanigans#personal thoughts tag#no matter who it is talking about queerness i always hold my breath and i'm sure it's obvious why#my previous church wasn't homophobic really at all which i feel fortunate for but i WAS exposed to the sect of homophobic xtianity a lot#and i know jewish thought about queerness is: 1. not monolithic and 2. not the same as xtianity#but i feel beyond grateful that g-d has given me the chance to find this shul. it's literally everything i've dreamt of in a shul#literally the ONLY issue is that we are so small as to have problems with budget#i need to remember to withdraw some money to donate... i always forget#i also feel grateful because i'm a heavily pierced person and i always forget that i look VERY alt to 'normal' people#i've been slowly realizing that maybe the entire world doesn't see me as normal the way i do#because to me i do NOT look alt whatsoever. but having more than like two facial piercings (i have Way more) is very not normal apparently#i think that's partially why one of the families at my shul seemed... apprehensive about me? which was funny because...#...i don't notice i'm a pierced person anymore. to me my piercings are literally another body part#and also one of the members said he's totally fine with the Queer Thing seeing as his son is trans and he's gotten used to it#girl (not specific to gender) that's a bombshell to drop 😭
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just a few foster puppy pictures out of the hmm. 500 that i have
[id: nine photographs of various brown, floppy-eared puppies. first: top view where puppy is sitting down and looking up at the camera. second: sitting with his tongue out. third: laying down on her side with her head on my leg, looking straight at the camera.
fourth: laying down on her belly. fifth: sitting and leaning against me, his head quite close to the camera, which he's looking at. sixth: one puppy lays down while another rests her chin on his back.
seventh: an extremely close-up view of a puppy's face. eighth: a puppy, who notably has one blue eye, looks through the glass door. ninth: puppy stands on her hind legs, front paws on the glass door, looking inside. end id]
#monotonepost#piranhapuppies#<- gonna be tagging any pics i post of them as that#dogs#couple of the pics r a lot older than others.#and possibly 500 is a bit dramatic i dont actually remember how many i have. but i have a LOT regardless#realized i never rlly posted any of them though...#we don't have any of them anymore. they're either gotten given to other fosters or adopted#unfortunately half of them did get sick with parvo. a couple were ones we'd given to another foster#the last 3 we had left we had to give to a parvo house#they've been pulling through tho they're doing ok!#if u dont know about parvo it's a really nasty (literally) disease. fatal if u dont get them help within 24ish hours#um. on a more brighter note that pup in the 2nd to last pic? he actually ended up keeping that blue eye#which is weird cause neither of his parents have blue eyes. the pups ARE mutts tho so shrug#of course the brattiest one had to be the prettiest one <3 very pretty brown brindling pattern too. like a calico cat#i say brattiest he's actually a sweetheart. just very excitable#goddd i miss these guys so much...#was really tempted to keep one of them for a bit there but im just not a very energetic person so i figured it was best i didnt.#does mean im forever gonna be wondering about what-ifs though.#ALSO to note: these were some of the few nice pictures i got. most of them were blurry cause they were never still sdfjkhdsfj
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genuinely always so shocked to see mirei hate. like literally god forbid women do anything.
#y5 haters in general... does playable haruka mean nothing to you...#DOES SHINADA TATSUO MEAN NOTHING TO YOU...#for legal reasons this is a joke people are allowed to feel however they want about whatever it's just viddy games#and i fully acknowledge y5 and its litany of flaws#of which there are certainly enough for any given individual to justifiably dislike/hate its entirety but I AM A Y5 LOVER THRU AND THRU#saejima's arc is just an arguably less interesting rehash of the one he had in 4?#(jail; jailbreak; betrayed by his lil buddy guy#but now we're sans the interesting character stuff of his feelings regarding the hit. & also i miss his hair.#& that's not even to say i think saejima is boring in y5 i think there's some interesting subtext to take away from his character#unique to this entry but it's pretty hard to deny how much is literally just y4 again but now he's bald)#BUT WHO GAFS he got buffed to hell gameplay-wise and punches bears now#and also baba's a great character and he doesn't have to do a whole chase minigame if a cop sees him anymore#bloated/unfocused feeling in general to the game?#WELL THAT'S JUST MORE CONTENT BABY!!! only a real issue if you're a completionist imo#+ are u telling me you don't wanna drive a taxi? u don't wanna play a video game in which the goal is to drive as normally as possible?#and i loveeeee multiple protagonists yay <3 y0 y4 and y5 are my favs so far lol (up to y6)#kiryu's inclusion in y5 also feels way more justified than in y4. he was so tacked on there i'm trying to remember what he even really did#other than tiger dropping as a boss fight before instantly forgetting how to tiger drop the second he became playable#and losing track of yasuko and getting tag-teamed by akiyama and tanimura (cough) and beating up daigo#but in exchange akiyama becomes the protag that feels kinda tacked on in y5. way less so than kiryu in y4 tho for sure#anyway. weird/strangely justified plot beats? WELL THAT'S JUST EVERY YAKUZA GAME#an arguably strange/poor writing choice for majima especially given how he ended up being written in y0?#well honestly other than the age thing i think it makes him more interesting... he's kinda fucked up!#but i do get why people are /really/ not a fan of it. ik i just said i think it makes him more interesting but if it gets retconned#or even just never mentioned again i wouldn't be surprised tbh and i wouldn't say that i'd mind either#but additionally he's not even a major character in y5 so it feels like it's not really a significant complaint imo#anyway anyone can do this ('this' being acknowledging the flaws of a thing and then letting how much they otherwise enjoy#said thing determine how much they let said flaws influence their overall opinion) ...such is the beauty of subjectivity... i love you.#contra.txt#yakuza
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EXTREMELY CRUSTY but I’ve been working on oc designs in between DC prompts. My little meow meows im so sorry i neglected you (i will inevitably do it again </3)
#the enterprise of evil#holden romero-cortes#dolly cooper#aurora lincoln#jo hawkins#tagging with full names to separate these from my old enterprise stuff (which im still fond of! but is just being slowly reworked)#mine#i literally always forget to tag my stuff with that#oc art#ocs#anyway BOOM design updates. uhh holdens much the same just some stronger shape language + cute socks and headband :]#aurora isn't skinny anymore (BLESSED BE) and i redid her hair very fun. the skirt is her old cheerleading skirt#she's wearing it as a weird power play to the cheersquad. but it's also a little sad <3#she has headphones too bc she's the sound guy#dolly has a slightly less generic haircut. magnus said he looks archie coded and i very much agree#also switched up his blazer design. very cool i likes it very much#i tried to give jos hair a more exaggerated graphic quality but i don't have thr most experience drawing protective hairstyles-#-so if anyone wants to weigh-in feel free! she also has the white streak now. either bc it's plot relevant or bc she's a weeb#currently undecided. and jo likes to play the most with her uniform bc she doesn't respect Desdemona or her family-#-and also she's alternative. and everyone in foolshope loves jo and would take mob action if Desdemona was mean to her#meanwhile Holden has the most complete uniform bc she has internalised notions of respectability and-#-'gaming the system' by being a part of it. oh sweet darling you have no idea the trouble that will get you into later#anyway enterprise 2.0 doesn't have much of a reworked plot yet but this was fun#i was (initially lmao) trying to simplify them for potential comic usage but uh. we'll see#anyway yeah lol for all 5 ppl who remember these goobers. behold
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girls literally only want one thing and it's fucking disgusting
[life size replica of Courier's bike]
#akudama drive#< i don't think my posts are showing up in the tag anymore actually.....#now that they finished all showings. do you think they destroyed the bike or is it just Out In The World Somewhere#anyways I just finished watching the play#i'm literally the only one who has the disk but i'm like the last person to have watched it#and it's like. exactly what i expected. which is to say it's good#i have no fucking clue what anyone was saying but the ending was so sweet#like Kurosawa just seems so genuine she was literally sobbing at the end#and holy shit i remember complaining that Honda said all his lines really quick#well his normal speaking voice is like: hiimplayingcutthroat 'n mynameishondareothankyouforcoming#but I do appreciate how he puts in so much in-character energy even when he's just in the background#and all the undertones of the bond between the actors 🥺 like Master and Courier's actors seemed to get along really well#i find it strange that they sort of removed Boss from it#like she shows up twice as a disembodied voice (i think it's her actual VA too) and that's it????#where's Sniper's actor lurking in the background >:(#rave ramblees#am i happy about the near $200 i spent on this? no#am i happy that I have it and it's properly archived forever? yes absolutely#i couldn't stand the idea that the play would only exist in the memories of whoever saw it#and the few who owned the disks but didn't rip it. leaving it vulnerable to destruction via scratches/degradation#the chinese uploader on bilibili definitely had a rip of it though so it's fucking annoying that they only released a few minutes of it
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the whole 'there are not very many Great Causes worth fighting for these days' from Julian scanned as WAY more out of touch than the moon landing thing for me the first time i read tsh
#like to the point of it being actively jarring when i got to him saying that#the secret history#'they landed on the moon??' well okay i guess it's not really their area#and they've been really out of touch with the news since it's also not really their area + they've been#off to the woods/a country house/etc and getting very drunk and killing deer and also people#i don't remember the exact dates re the moonlanding + the events of the book but like.#Sure. that's probably fair or at least kind of understandable#that could Feasably Happen On Accident at least#but julians like 'there isn't much worth fighting for these days' and um.#if you pay attention to literally anything happening in the world at any given moment at all. ever.#....what? literally what do you mean by this?#there have always been So So many Great Causes that people are dying for all the time constantly forever#and even if you've somehow managed to comoletely block out literally every piece of news/political development/etc#that's not really a reason to assume there Aren't. that's a reason to go like. well if there are any Great Causes left today then#I don't know about them. and even if we assume he's defining what makes a cause worth fighting for by classical values#and saying that that means for example that he wouldn't necessarily think of say the civil rights movement or liberatory movements etc#as fitting (which i think is also probably debatable- it comes to mind that the athenians valued (their own) freedom. political engagement#was valued but only the right kind from the right people. etc. what i'm saying is that#no i don't think they actually fit what julian would be thinking of as the classical mind's* idea of a great cause worth dying for#but also you could debate that/frame things differently/etc (*presumably there is a more particular subset of the population he has in mind#than just 'classical' or 'greek' in actuality. like. specifically those from whom we having writing/would have citizenship/etc.))#i'm certain there are plenty of arguments to be made. like plenty of people are fighting for various countries#it's not like wars or empires have stopped existing or other myriad conflicts have stopped existing#also in typing this i've realised he was maybe forshadowing henry's death#and now i need to go look up the exact quote and make another post i guess.#(also disclaimer that i'm aware i've phrased a lot of this clumsily. it is midnight these are the tags of a tumblr post and i am not sober.)#anyway to rephrase my initial point i just think with the moon landing thing that's One major event you missed.#if you're saying that there are No Great Causes Worth Fighting/Dying For (with the understanding that you think those are a thing#that can exist) then i think maybe you managed to skip out on hearing about significantly more#than just the one major event. that's much harder to manage i would think
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