#I like how i disappear for months and then come back with the dumbest drawings lololol

[monkeybebop]

Been obsessed with Better Call Saul for the past couple of months, Nacho is my baby girl.

[aphroditeinthesea]

can you do connor stoll x reader where the reader got to camp a month ago and they havent talk yet. there personalities are both loud and defined and over time they become really good friends. then they start to realize they like each other as more then friends... but the reader is a child of Poseidon and has to leave with the argo two.

“ i’m such a fool for you ”

connor stoll x daughter of poseidon 🐍

reader comes to terms with feelings for her best friend while trying to deal with the disappearance of her brother

tw none

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Y/N found herself befriending the younger of the Stoll brothers after a prank he had pulled on her only a little after she had arrived at camp. On a morning where her brother had left the cabin early, so she was alone in cabin 3, she found her cabin surrounded by cups of water as she tried to leave. At first she thought she thought this was the dumbest prank to pull on her, after all, she could control water. However, when she tried to empty the cups, the water wouldn't budge. No matter how hard she tried, the cups stayed still, unaffected. She began to panic, wondering if she had somehow lost her powers overnight. So, she grabbed the cup closest to her, just to find that it wasnt water at all, just clear jello.

“Hey, L/N!” she heard called. She looked up to find Connor Stoll standing in front of her, holding a cup identical to the ones that surrounded her, “how’re the water works going?”

She huffed, “Did you two do this?!”

“Actually,” he smiled, “I did this one myself.”

“Good to know,” she watched him take a sip of his cup, “by the way,” she began.

“What?” He asked before his drink was entirely splashed onto his face.

“You're cleaning this up, Stoll.”

Despite her initial annoyance, she had to admit the cleverness of it. She only wished she could find a way to return the favor.

Which she did, as she was somehow able to get Travis on board. During a game of capture the flag, she snuck back to camp and hid in the Hermes cabin, where after the game, while everyone was still celebrating the winning team, Travis would tell Connor they needed to talk in private.

She watched Connor follow behind his brother as they walked in, “dude, is it something serious or like-” Before he could finish, a puddle of water that had been floating above him, poured down like a rainstorm.

“So,” Y/N laughed, walking over to him, “how’re the water works going for you?”

He wiped his eyes, “good one, L/N,” he sarcastically sighed.

She nodded, beginning to walk out of the cabin, “by the way, thanks for the help, Travis!”

“You helped her?!” She could hear Connor exclaim on the other side of the door as she giggled to herself.

The joy of her revenge was short lived though. The day after, she found her older brother to be missing.

She sat on the sandy beach, asking her father for help, but hearing nothing in response. She tried to calm her anxieties by drawing circles in the sand.

“Y/N?” She heard a familiar voice call from behind her.

She took a deep breath before forcing a smile and turning her head, “hey, Stoll.”

“I heard about your brother,” he sat down next to her.

She nodded, “yeah, I’m sure he’s fine, but still…”

He bit his cheek, “you know, if you weren't all upset and everything, I would have totally gotten you back for yesterday.”

She chuckled, “You’d really start a prank war with me?”

“You bet,” he smirked.

“Try me.”

So then on, the only thing that could cheer her up through the months that her brother was missing was the same person who annoyed her most. Or so she said.

“Seems like Annabeth’s pretty stressed about that one shoe boy, huh?” Connor mentioned as they walked through the forest.

“Yeah,” Y/N answered. She didn't want to admit how hopeful she was about the prophecy. She was sure there were lots of demigods who could lose a shoe, gods know she has plenty of times.

“Pretty embarrassing for him though,” he joked, “you get back to camp after months and you're a mess.”

“Connor,” she spoke as she stopped walking.

He paused, “yeah?”

“I know it’s not gonna be my brother,” she added, “I just know. And I really just don't wanna think about it right now.”

He nodded, “oh, sorry,” he awkwardly responded, “but you gotta admit, it’d be embarrassi-”

She grabbed a stick off the ground and poked him in the side, “shut up.”

He raised an eyebrow and grabbed his own stick, “make me.”

“You!” She yelled, trying to stab him with the stick again, but he instead began running.

He ran backwards, looking back at her, “you have to admit, I’m pretty fast.”

“You're such an idiot!”

“What do you mean-” he asked right before slamming his back into a tree.

Y/N cackled as she reached him, “that’s what I mean,” she smirked, poking him with the stick.

“Kick me while I’m down, that’s real nice.”

She smiled and helped pull him up. She lingered her grip on his hand for a little too long before letting go, but she noticed his hand not even budge enclosed in her fingers. They both awkwardly stayed silent for a moment, feeling like there was something on the tip of their tongues that they both wanted to say.

“Y/N!” Annabeth’s voice rang through the forest. Annabeht stopped as she stared at the two of them, “Y/N, he’s here, come on.”

Y/N nodded, “right,” she began walking towards Annabeth, “see you later, Connor,” she waved.

He stood still for a moment, “bye.”

She walked alongside Annabeth, trying to shake the feeling in her chest.

“Let me get this straight,” Connor questioned. He was in the middle of training with Y/N when she told him about the plan, “you’re going to the Roman camp with Annabeth, Jason, Piper, and Leo?”

She nodded, resting her sword down, “yeah.”

He shook his head, “you can't just go like that, L/N.”

“What?” She breathily laughed, not believing what he had just said, “it’s my brother, I have to go with them.”

He ran his fingers through his hair, “but that’s- what am I supposed to do with that?”

“You have friends other than me,” she replied, “this isn't about you, Connor.”

He sat down on a nearby bench, “I know but…”

She sat next to him, “but?”

“Y/N,” he egan, “I’ve been really wanting to tell you something and I can’t yet.”

She nudged his shoulder, “you're my best friend, Connor. Come on, hit me.”

He sighed, “you're really going?”

“Yes,” she muttered, “now, will you just tell me?”

He stood up, “can we talk somewhere else?”

“Alright,” she obliged. He suddenly grabbed her hand and led her away. She might’ve said something if she didn't enjoy the feeling of his hand in hers so damn much. When he walked into her empty cabin she knew whatever he had to say was important.

He hesitantly let go of her hand, “Y/N, I- uhm- I really, really like you,” he whispered, “I get that you have a lot going on right now, but-”

She smirked, grabbing his face and kissing his lips. She couldn't tell how long this went on. All she knew was that he immediately relaxed into the kiss, his hands finding her waist to pull her closer to him. She knew that she could feel his lips curled into a smile that mirrored her own.

When they pulled away, their faces were still only centimeters apart and a trail of saliva reached between their lips, “I kinda like you too, Stoll.”

He just smiled even more, quickly pulling her into another kiss.

[zodiacrant]

🍩My experiences with each Moon sign🍩

(Cause yall are messy)

I have done this a few times before but for Sun signs and did rank placements but never shared my thoughts and experiences with the Moon signs.

Now I know how this goes, so if you get mad or sad then go off I guess. Aint the first time I get cursed out or attacked in this bitch. Plus, I am a Cap moon so naturally I won’t do well with some Moons and I will be nitpicking everything about everyone.

🍩Aries Moon🍩

My dad’s moon. Yup, that tells you alot without me even starting. Having our Moons in Square shit was hard to say the least. It took a long time for us to be on middle grounds and because I don’t feel comfortable talking about my problems here I will continue on. The Aries Moon that I really like and can think of is Rihanna, so I would say it’s unfair to make a whole judgment but from what I saw and heard they’re not exactly the best to be around. So I give them a 3/10 for being bold and having nerve.

🍩Taurus Moon🍩

Now this Moon right here I know people from ( a close friend and my sister, plus some others) and I don’t have many strong opinions about it. As a Taurus Sun, it can be a challenge to work with a Taurus Moon. I am stubborn at my core and they’re stubborn with their heart, so everytime we disagree it’s like a rope pulling contest. Way too stagnant for me but I think that’s because of my other placements and they don’t take any advice or open up no matter what. On to the good, I never disliked someone with this placement. No matter how much of an asshole they can be, to me it is difficult to hate them or stay mad at them. They’re warm, kind, and sweet but a bit aloof and naive, also they don’t like to touch and hug as some people might think. I will give them a 8/10

🍩Gemini Moon🍩

(⚠️TW⚠️ mention of rape and erratic behavior)

I only had one best friend with this placement and I don’t I want to meet any more, and I am at peace with that if they resemble her in any way. She was a maniac. She loved to lie, create drama, blow shit up, act crazy and basically be shocking. I do find similarities with Gemini Sun where they do shit for reactions but with her, she will take it to the next level. Lie about being raped, act possessed, or pretend that she is being followed. It’s not fair to associate her with people who share the same Moon as her but that was y’all’s representation in my life. She was erratic so it’s difficult to see where her Moon was in effect and where she was just off. I’ll give them a 1/10, would not recommend until proven otherwise.

🍩Cancer Moon🍩

The first that comes to my mind is Taylor Swift and to me she is the ultimate Cancer Moon. It juat makes sense how fast she takes it to the next level with people. Whether getting serious quickly with someone or throwing down and feuding. She just always at a 100. Personally, I never got close with someone who has this placement, maybe it’s because I am a Capricorn Moon myself, but I would say the ones that I have met were nice. I’ll give them a 5/10

🍩Leo Moon🍩

I only had one best friend with this placement but the people I have met with this Moon I still remember. They all had one thing in common and that was being emotionally traumatized and have lost one parent. My best friend was super loyal, very confident in what they believed in and represented, were always there for me and had an amazing ability in motivating others. But they were also super prideful and there’s no coming back with them. Fight once and it’s over. (Yes I am looking at you Jonnie). One of the other people was with me in uni and always had the to urge won up me and my friend. He had scars all over and he doesn’t remember how he got them. But he was super proud of himself and his home country, which I respect and admire. I’ll give them a 6/10

🍩Virgo Moon🍩

I know two people with this placement, my mom and a professor at uni, and oh boy it makes sense that they’re a Virgo Moon. Me and my mom are too alike that we clash strongly at times. She thinks she can do it better and I think I can do it better and we just have like a competition on who done it better basically. From cooking, to how you light the stove, to how you put on clothes, to how you lay down on bed. Both my mom and my professor are super critical and precise, althogh my professor is a double Virgo (Sun and Moon) so she will go even further. They have to do everything as it arises and act like there’s no time and everything is about to go wrong. Like damn sis chill the fuck out for a sec and this is coming from a Cap moon so you know it’s bad. But I really like Virgo Moon, even though people might hate such a personality but I can relate to them in some ways. I’ll give them 7/10

🍩Libra Moon🍩

My only online friend that I talk to all the time got this Moon. Other than her I met only two people and they were something. Okay so for my friend, because I never actually have seen her physically with my own eyes I can’t say how she acts all the time, but she is one of the best listeners I had in my life. She likes to hear me ramble for an hour about a dumb encounter that lasted a second, talking about astrology and some nerdy things and then not so nerdy things. I believe that it’s a Libra Moon quality to be emotionally versatile and attentive. I think because she is a Leo dominant she acts much fiery and fiercely than a Libra would. As for the other people I just thought they were fake. One acted as a friend but then would just disappear so I was over it quickly and the other was super passive and pretentious that I think she shits out plastic. All in all I think it’s a great Moon. I’ll give them a 7/10

🍩Scorpio Moon🍩

One of the hardest Moons I ever delt with but I find that I love them too. My oldest sister had this Moon and she is such a mystery. Because I am a Taurus Sun, it is only natural for me to have a hard time with a Scorpio Moon. Even though she is an extrovert, she rarely talks about herself and her feelings, you will never catch her slipping or show vulnerability. I can see how difficult it may be for her being a Cancer with a Scorpio Moon and have Gemini dominance. But she’s a bitch at heart and I am cool with it. I’ll give them 5/10 cause I am not a big fan of paradoxical people

🍩Sagittarius Moon🍩

A moon that I always babysat. I had two best friends with this Moon and if I was born a second earlier, it would mine too. I don’t know if it’s because of my Gemini Venus or my 0 degree Capricorn Moon but I love Sagittarius Moons. I was fortunate to see some of their weaknesses and for them to trust me enough to be vulnerable. But boy do they get themselves into the dumbest situation because they wanted to see what would happen. I had to babysit them and help them do everything like shopping, cooking, cleaning, assembling furniture, be their body guard when buying weed. (Shhhh it’s a secret). They’re in many ways immature cause they run from things and everytime you try to be real with them, they say “stop being negative”. I’ll give them a 9/10

🍩Capricorn Moon🍩

The grande dame of the Moon signs, sitting at it’s opposite planet. I have met many Cap Moons and honestly we are bitches 😂. The energy of sitting next to a Capricorn Moon is too fucking much like I never knew it’s like that. I noticed the way they stare, talk, walk and sit can be so aggressive and intimidating. I see why people might label us as bullies, cause the energy is definitely there and I myself was such a cunt (still a little but I am more aware of myself now) that I get where both are coming from. Life as a Capricorn Moon is emotionally flat. If wasn’t for my other placements you will never see me even flinch. I think we just take everything and let it process in our head before we let it into our hearts. So to me, we’re not mean, we just don’t see how something might be hurtful. But also that tone and that blank face, goddam! That’s why I try to smile cause bitch no, I didn’t know I was walking with a death stare this whole time. Anyways, I will give us 10/10 cause I am self appreciative like that 😂✌️

🍩Aquarius Moon🍩

I have always tried to understand Aquarius Moon and it was only a month ago that I have realized they themselves are not sure of who they’re. I had one best friend with this placement and three cousins (all siblings). First, my cousins are super competitive with each other on who gets to do what and if it happens that they’re similar in something they will get pissed. The person that was my best friend was like that as well. Only he would drop a an entire hobby, interest, something close to his heart, shit even a personality trait. I find them to be constantly changing and trying, so they shift between one end of extreme to the other until they center themselves. I’ll give them a 4/10

🍩Pisces Moon🍩

Now let’s talk about a depressing placement, in my opinion of course 😅. I don’t know if it’s the influence of Neptune on the Moon or is it the just the demeanor of Pisces, but good god girl get a grip (they call this the five G’s). My youngest sister is a Pisces Moon, and as creative as she is, she is pessimistic and overly cynical. I mean I am all for being critical and real but looking at everything with jacked up black sprayed glasses is just too much for me. Other than my sister I don’t know any Pisces Moon very well but I had a few acquaintances. I noticed that they talked about a specific thing and that’s it. I have found them to be amazing at drawing, painting and have an incredible artistic sense. At times twisted and dark, but I love the art that comes with it. I’ll give them a 5/10

Here’s the tea. It’s Pisces season so remember I am sensitive right now, and also it’s my life and I wish I met someone as amazing as you might think you’re. (Maybe that was a little too aggressive)

Okay love you ❤️

[ayatosmlktea]

best boyfriend series | kirishima

A/N: So there is a list me and the gal pals have compiled of who we think are the best boyfriends in the entire world. I haven’t been in a thirsting mood for so long probably bc im mad ✨depressed✨ so the only thing on my mind is soft boys and how amazing they are. This is the most writing I've done in months but I wrote this for Bri’s birthday a while back and am now sharing them with you bc we could all use some wholesome kiripima 

I wrote these as the thoughts came to my mind so...its not really organized ANYWAY enjoy!

- Your sense of humour and easy going personality is what draws him in even if he doesn’t realize it to be love in the beginning

- Even when he’s training with bakugou his eyes are always searching you out, the way you handle your quirk takes his breath away he just thinks you look so badass in combat

- Every time you ask if he wants to study together his heart starts racing so fast it feels like it’s going to burst out of  his chest and he has to fight back the blush that burns the back of his neck and ears whenever you giggle

- As you and Mina become closer, you start hanging out more with the bakusquad.

- Kiri finds himself getting increasingly distracted by you, he notices every little thing like the way your eyes shine whenever you smile, the way cover your mouth when you laugh which bothers him because the entire world deserves to see how beautifully radiant you look when you’re happy

- He notices the way your body language changes when you’re tired, how your attitude gets a little grumpier when you’re hungry and through learning all of that Kiri steps in to make you whole

- When you’re tired he passes you his notes to copy after class just giving you a knowing smile and ignoring the way his heart flutters when you stare at him like he’s your knight in shining armour

- He doesn’t like the way that Denki and sero playfully flirt with you, it makes him feel weird although he knows he has no right to be jealous so he ignores it

- During your second year you start dating Shinsou and Kiri can feel his world come to a halt, his heart plummets into this stomach but he puts on a fake smile and tells you that he’s happy for you and he hopes Shinsou treats you right

- You don’t seem to notice the way the light in his eyes is gone, how much more time he puts into training now that you’re busy with your new relationship and as bitter and mad as he wants to be he knows you deserve to be happy, even if it isn’t with him so he pushes his feelings down and acts like he isn’t being punched in the gut every time you kiss shinsou and not him

- Your last night in the dorms before summer vacation Kirishima finds himself being woken up by a quick series of knocks on his door

“Denki I told you already pennywise is not under your be-” he stops mid sentence when he finds you outside of his door, sniffling with red rimmed eyes

- He’s barely awake and processing what’s happening as he opens his door wider so you can come inside before one of the teachers catches you out of bed and on the boys side of the dorms

- He can hear that you’ve been crying and are still trying not to when you apologize for waking him up so late but you didn’t know who else to go to and suddenly his entire body is burning with anger when you tell him that Shinsou broke up with you

- He can’t help but let out a broken laugh, Shinsou never deserved your heart in the first place. If he couldn’t see how dedicated you were to the people you loved, how you cared for your friends and put their needs above yours, how incredibly talented and hardworking and beautiful you were then he was the dumbest man alive

- You’re suddenly quiet and Kiri realizes that he’s said all of that outloud and the overwhelming urge to disappear consumes him. He was sure that you were going to get up and walk out and never speak to him again but you don’t

- Instead you ask if he means what he said so quietly he can barely hear it and despite how hot his cheeks are burning with embarrassment he tells you he does

- He stops you when you lean in to kiss him and his heart hurts when he can see the rejection and embarrassment paint your features but he tells you that it’s not because he doesn’t want to kiss you, because of course he wants to, but he doesn’t want to take advantage of your feelings when you’re going through an emotional time

- You two spend the summer hanging out- just as friends, he wants to give you time to get over Shinsou because the last thing he wants is to be your rebound

- But with every day that goes by he finds it harder not to kiss you, not to hold your hand, not to text you every second of the day, not to tell you that he loves you

- The realization that he loves you doesn’t scare him, but it is the first time he admits to himself and accepts it rather than trying to bury it and so after he walks you home and you turn to go into inside he grabs your wrist and pulls you in for a kiss

- It’s not the most coordinated kiss but it sets every nerve in his body on fire and you’re both clinging onto each other like it’s your only lifeline. You break apart with the biggest smiles on your face and in that moment Kiri knows he’s going to spend the rest of his life with you

‧͙⁺˚*·༓☾　　☽༓·*˚⁺‧͙

- Well i wasn’t planning to write all that so now let’s get into WHY he’s the best bf

He’s 100% devoted to you, literally you could be in a room full of fkn models and his eyes would be focused on you because he thinks you’re the most beautiful woman to walk the earth

Any other relationship you’ve had in the past does not even come close in comparison to how Kiri treats you

- He would give up his life to make sure you’re happy, seeing you upset breaks his heart because he cannot stand the sight of you crying. It literally tears a whole in his chest

- If it’s within his power to deal with, he will make sure that whoever hurts you does not make the same mistake again. Maybe its a little unethical to use his pro-hero status to strike fear into the heart of creeps who won’t leave you alone at work, or the girls who enjoy gossiping about your relationship behind your back but he does not give a single fuck

- Your happiness comes before his and if you aren’t happy, he’s not happy.

- If he hears people talking about your relationship and making it seem as though you’re only with him for the fame or money he’ll tear them down with the brightest smile on his face not missing a beat

- While he acts all big and scary fighting villains, when he comes home to you at the end of the day he is the most cuddly person you’ve ever known. It doesn’t matter how exhausted he is, he always grabs you in for a hug and doesn’t let you down until he’s satisfied.

- Kiri is really big on skin to skin contact, expect him to constantly be slipping his hands under your shirt and wrapping his arms around you at the most random times

- When you guys are getting ready to sleep he’ll pull you snug against his chest and bury his face in the nape of your neck,

Your scent helps him fall asleep, not in a creepy way but in a ‘you’re safe and here with me so i can close my eyes knowing that everything is okay’ kind of way.

‧͙⁺˚*·༓☾　　☽༓·*˚⁺‧͙

- In my humble opinion, once kiri catches feelings for you they’ll never fade

- Even if you fight, it only reminds him of everything you two have built together and that you’re worth fighting for

- You hear a lot of your friends complain about how their boyfriends never listen to them, or how they don’t know what they like, you watch them shamelessly flirt with other guys and wonder what it must be like to be in such an unsatisfying relationship

- Kiri knows you better than you know yourself, he’s so in tune with you and your body that you don’t even need to ask him to do anything, he just knows

- He remembers little dates that most boyfriends dont, your first kiss, your first date, the first time he said “i love you” outloud

- He also is the first one to say it and it happens when you’re just hanging out in his room

- He’s known that he’s been in love with you for months but didnt want to say it too soon and have you freak out but after nearly six months in it’s driving him crazy not being able to tell you he loves you

- When he does your eyes glisten with tears and he freaks out thinking that he’s said too soon until you’re crushing him in a hug and tell him that you love him too

- When you’ve had a bad day at work or life is just becoming too stressful for you to deal with he puts everything else on hold to comfort you

- Makes you your favourite meal for dinner, gets your favourite show ready to watch after your shower and massages your feet while you snack on some ice cream for dessert

- Ever since you’d started dating Kiri had a habit of “accidentally” forgetting his hoodies at your place, spraying them with a bit of extra cologne while you were in another room

- He loved it when you wore his clothes, it filled him with a feeling he couldn’t quite describe but it solidified in his mind that you were his

- After almost four years of dating he knows that he can’t spend another second without you being his, forever

- He stays up all night looking at engagement rings but none of them are good enough for you so he does a little more research and finds a place that makes custom rings and has the date the first time he kissed you engraved on the inside of the ring

- He 100% cries the second he sees you walk down the aisle, if he thought you were beautiful before, there’s nothing else that compares to you on your wedding day

-  Everything else drowns out around him and the other thing that matters is you, sliding your rings onto each other fingers and sharing your tearful vows and then you’re pronounced husband and wife and his entire being is elated

- He kisses you with a passion and fervour you’ve never felt before, like he’s pouring his soul into the kiss , every promise he’s ever made and will make and all the things he can’t find the right words to say are transmitted

[possiamo-andare]

Midsummer pt. 2: JJ Maybank

JJ x Reader

MASTERLIST

word count: over 6.8k (I went a little overboard lol)

a/n: first off, I'd like to say holy moly you guys are amazing I never thought I'd get over 600 notes on anything let alone something I wrote. Your kind words have bee so motivating so I definitely had to write a part 2 for everyone. Second, I just want to thank everyone who has messaged, reblogged, liked anything I've written. It's so fulfilling to know someone enjoys my stuff. You guys are he best <3

~

The last time JJ was interested in one girl at a time, was back when his only example of what a woman was, was in an inappropriate magazine. It's not like he never tried to like one girl at a time, but when he tried, something better always came along to distract him. JJ was curious by nature to put it lightly. The saying 'never judge a book by it's cover' was not true when it came to JJ. Usually, whatever you judged about him was right. He had been around obx with many Pogue ladies and flaunted it. He was proud being a bachelor that got around and rarely anyone held that against him.

But now, he was done for. By a Kook no less. A stupid Kook that JJ had met once a long time ago.

It was a stupid crush. Nothing he couldn't handle. His number of crushes spanned a long and thorough list. To say he was a pro at getting his crushes interested in him was an understatement. Then he saw you with Rafe and everything he felt for you disappeared. Disappeared might not be a good word. More like, he suppressed every feeling he felt for you the day he met you at the station until he could feel nothing at all. It was truly a tragic day for JJ when he found out you were dating Rafe. Then, JJ did what he did the best; he found another girl to distract himself with.

Just when he thought he was getting over the tragic situation, you had shown up at the Midsummer party. He hadn't thought about you, or your gorgeous smile or your pretty hair for a few weeks now and just as he thought he was turning a corner, you stood in front of him and demanded two sodas. You had not recognized him. He could tell. You knew who he was, of course, after you rudely told him what you thought of him, but you didn't remember your run in at the station months ago. He knew that if you were ever gonna remember him this time, he had to pull out all the stops. That meant he had to be extra charming and extra funny.

JJ wanted to slap himself. He couldn't believe he had put himself in this situation. He wished that you meant nothing. Every other Kook girl meant nothing to him (except Kie of course, but that's different), so why were you different?

He couldn't think too much about it. If he did, he would have to self analyze and that's something he rarely did. So, he just acted like an asshole to you. Being difficult with girls always worked. JJ knew the less you cared about their existence, the more they chased. And that might be true for the other girls JJ liked but definitely not you. He felt like he was always losing a battle whenever he spoke to you. You were super defensive the entire time he tried to talk to you. He couldn't get a word in edgewise and it didn't help that your image of him was already tainted.

So, he tried another approach. He tried to be himself. This would be anyone's first choice but we are talking about JJ. He's had to put up so many barriers so people don't see the real him, it was hard to keep track of which one to use. There was the lady's man JJ, the Pogue JJ, the obedient son, the annoying friend, and even the protector. JJ was just never truly himself. Of course his friends knew this and they accepted any form of JJ, but he knew you wouldn't. So, he just was himself.

And the next thing he knows, you're kissing him. Technically, he leaned in first, but you definitely closed the gap between you two which had to count for something.

Maybe it was because he liked you so much, or maybe it was because of the gin he downed before dancing with you, but your kisses made him feel like he was in fifth grade. Every kiss felt like the first one. He felt things he'd never felt before; by a Kook nonetheless.

And then, too soon, the moment was interrupted by a busboy. Gerald and his ability to cock block. But he had agreed to meet with you again, as if you were thirteen meeting at a tree house, and he couldn't believe it. You wanted to see him again. You knew who he was, you had learned things about him, and still wanted to see him. Never, and JJ means never, had a girl seen this much of him and still wanted to stay.

That night, JJ couldn't sleep. Even though JB had told him where the gold was and how they were gonna get it, he still would've been able to sleep if it were not for his mind racing with you. He even let his dad yell at him that night. He was in too much of a good mood.

That is, until JB was pushed off a ledge and was rushed to the hospital. Sarah was with him when it happened and JJ had been in the car, waiting for his friend. JB was JJ's family, along with the rest of his friends. JB had let him sleep over countless times when JJ's dad had been especially violent. He had helped JJ in every situation possible and JJ knew he could never repay him. So, to see JB asleep in the hospital with a cast, made his blood boil. And when he found out it was Topper's fault, he wanted to kill Topper himself. The only thing that held him back from doing so was staying in the hospital and waiting for JB to be alright. If JB had woken up any time before, maybe JJ would've had time to beat Topper's ass.

Kie, Pope, and JJ all waited together in the waiting room until there was an update on JB. They knew it wasn't as serious but they were determined to stay until their friend woke up. If it meant staying the whole day, then that's what they'd have to do. And so they did. They stayed well into the afternoon, with Sarah. She was in and out of the hospital room he was in and giving Kie, Pope, and JJ updates every time she did. They even got to talking and, even though Kie and Sarah barely spoke, Sarah was nice to them. She was one of the only Kooks that was nice to them.

The topic of Kooks made another memory resurface. JJ promised you he'd meet you at Sarah's house to "grab his keys" but, when JJ had checked the time, he was already late. He cursed at himself. He had unintentionally stood you up. You were for sure not gonna want to speak to him ever again and he had basically ruined any chance he had with you. He didn't want to tell his friends but they had noticed that once JJ was aware of the time, he had gotten more restless.

Kie had tried to ask him what was wrong but JJ was too upset to answer.

He felt like such an idiot.

Until he saw you enter the waiting room. He almost gasped but held it in, not to draw too much attention to himself. You barely looked at him as you walked in.

You wore black ripped jean shorts and a yellow tank top. You had your hair brushed into a loose braid and you had makeup on. You had done all of this because you were supposed to meet JJ but he had bailed on you. You had waited at Sarah's house for over an hour but, 20 minutes after he would've arrived, you knew he wasn't coming. You felt like an idiot. You had fallen for the oldest and dumbest trick in the book. Then, you got news of what happened to John B. and you realized that's probably why JJ got held up. You were still upset, but at least JJ had a good reason.

When you saw him sitting down in the waiting room, your stomach felt like it was in your throat. Seeing him in daylight was very different to seeing JJ in the dark. At least in the dark, you didn't see the extent of his scars. Now that you did, you felt like crying for him. You can't believe someone did that to him. In the dark, you didn't have to see him completely and you could get away with not looking in his eyes, since that always made you nervous. But now, you could see JJ completely and he was even more gorgeous in the light.

As you went to comfort Sarah, you pretended he wasn't there. You could tell, even with your back turned to him as you hugged Sarah, he was watching you. You felt his eyes burn into your back. But you were here for Sarah, that's it.

"Thanks for being here." Sarah said to you, letting out of your for a moment and looking to the hallway. "I should go and see how he's doing."

You nodded. "Yes, of course. Let me know if there's anything I can do."

Sarah smiled. "You being here is enough." And with that, she was walking back to John B.'s room.

You said hello to Kiara first. You had known her before today and you had always been polite to each other, even though Sarah and her didn't get along. When they did, all three of you hung out and had so much fun. You missed having her as a friend.

"Hey," you said, opening your arms for a hug. Kiara got up from her place in the chair and hugged you for a moment. Things were still a little awkward. "How are you?"

Kiara shrugged. "We just want to make sure John B. is okay."

I nodded. "I'll stay and maybe we can catch up?"

You knew she had a little resentment towards you and you didn't blame her. Sarah believed wholeheartedly that Kiara was the one that called the police on a party she had thrown a while ago and that's one of the reasons they're not friends anymore. Once Sarah let it slip that Kiara called the cops, Kiara was basically blacklisted whenever there was a party. Now, you were hoping to put that all behind you if it meant being Kiara's friend.

Kiara smiled but you could tell she was trying to suppress it. "I'd like that."

You then looked to a boy you knew was named Pope. You knew Pope's dad because he had once brought some groceries to your house at the last minute. It had been one of your mom's charity events and she had run out of a couple items. It was a Saturday night and Mr. Heyward was probably with his family but he got the items for her and delivered them to your house very quickly. Pope had been in a club you used to be in before you quit because Rafe said it took up too much of your time (you wanted to roll your eyes as you remembered all the shit you did to make him happy). Pope has always been nice to you when you were still in that club and when you voiced an idea, he always tried to back you up. You didn't know him that well but you knew him enough to give him a hug. He gladly accepted it, mumbling a hello as you hugged him.

"How are you? I haven't seen you in awhile." You stated, letting go of Pope and looking at him.

He struggled to meet your gaze, a bit embarrassed. You didn't know why but you figured that was just Pope's personality. "Not too bad. I'm president now."

You smiled. "That's so good to hear."

You couldn't believe he remembered that. Although he probably did remember it because the club was filled with Kooks and whenever they tried to pick on Pope, you always called them out. Even though you were grateful for his support, he was just as grateful for yours.

Pope nodded at you, smiling again. You could tell Kiara and Pope felt awkward. Mostly because you were one of the only Kooks that treated them nicely. Which was sad because you didn't understand why Kooks and Pogues didn't get along. Other than the fact that most of the Kooks (you're thinking of Topper and Rafe when you say most) are greedy, selfish assholes. You wanted them to like you really badly. One of the reasons was because they were Sarah and John B.'s friends. The other reason was because of the boy beside Pope, who was standing as well, and watching you closely.

JJ hadn't said one word to you since you entered the waiting room and you knew why. He wasn't sure if you guys should act like you know each other or not. To be honest, you weren't sure either. He had blown you off, for good reason, but then again, he could've gotten a message to you that he was in the hospital. You didn't have to find out from Ward, who drove you to the hospital. You had been waiting outside for an hour once Ward had pulled into the driveway. You asked him where Sarah was and he explained what had happened to John B. and offered you a ride. He had to pick up clean clothes for John B. since he was waking up soon.

You instantly knew why JJ never showed up but he could've easily asked Sarah to call you to let you know why he never arrived. The only explanation for not asking Sarah was because he didn't want anyone to know about what happened. This annoyed you.

When you had gone to bed the night before, you fell asleep to thoughts of JJ and what it would be like to be his girlfriend. Now, you had a rude awakening. He didn't want anyone to know that you had kissed. He was embarrassed to like a Kook.

So, being the salty teen you were, you decided to give him a taste of his own medicine. You were gonna pretend as if you had no idea who he was.

You stuck out your hand, waiting for him to shake it. He looked down at it, perplexed, and slowly extended his hand to shake yours. Once your hands had shaken, you spoke, "Nice to meet you. What's your name?"

JJ's brows furrowed but he answered you. "JJ."

He knew for sure that you were pissed. Before, he had only a small inclination that you were pissed but he now knew for 100% certainty, you were upset. He knew he should've at least tried to call you. He knew Sarah had your number and he knew it would be easy to ask Sarah for your number to call you but he got scared. He didn't know if you wanted anyone to know you guys were macking and he didn't want to embarrass you. He thought it wouldn't be the proudest thing for people to know you kissed JJ Maybank. For a Kook, you could get made fun of for that. So, he played it safe and didn't do anything. But now, he suffered the consequences. You were pissed. If he could only get you alone to explain.

"Cool." You said, smiling at him the way you would a stranger.

JJ looked to Pope and Kie, both of them looking back and forth from between the two of you. You could tell they thought this exchange was funny. You said nothing to JJ after that and just sat down in the chair across from Kiara. The both of you started a conversation as JJ and Pope stayed silent. You did talk about school but you mostly spoke about your summer so far. She had said it had been pretty uninteresting while you said the same. Although it was not over yet, you figured now it would be just like all the summer's before. Granted, you had thought it might be different now that you had met JJ but currently he was an idiot and you rather not spend a summer with someone who was embarrassed to be with you (even though that wasn't the case).

In the middle of your conversation with Kiara about the new documentary she was watching, JJ had gotten up from his place in the chair and mumbled that he had to go to the bathroom. You paid no attention to what he said but Pope and Kiara both nodded, telling him they could care less. You had continued your conversation with her for a minute more before your mind trailed to what JJ was doing. Obviously there was the option that he actually had to go to the bathroom, but then why would he announce it like that? You wondered whether or not he actually had to go to the bathroom or maybe it was a way of telling you he had to speak to you.

You decided the only way to figure out what the answer was, was to wait outside the men's bathroom to see if JJ actually wanted to talk to you or not. Granted, this was about the creepiest thing you could ever do but it was JJ and you were sure he had no reservations about you waiting outside the bathroom for him. In a weird way, it kinda comforted you to know anything weird you had done, JJ had probably done something weirder and would never judge you.

"I'm gonna go get some coffee," you announced to Kiara, who had finished speaking and was waiting for your response. "Want some?"

Kiara shook her head. "Nah, already had some."

You looked to Pope and raised your brows. He shook her head. "No, I already had some too."

You nodded and got up from your seat. "Well, I'm getting some. I'll be back in a second."

And with that, you were out of the waiting room and making your way to the men's bathroom. There was a sign that pointed you in the direction of the bathroom so you figured that it wasn't that far away. You passed a couple of hospital rooms and were not surprised to see most of the doors closed. They probably didn't want a nosy teenager peeking in anyways.

You always hated hospitals. You had to get a cast once when you broke your arm when you were younger and ever since, you hated the smell of hospitals. It smelled too clean. You also didn't like the idea that a floor beneath you, a woman was giving birth and a floor above you, someone could be dying.

As you passed the janitors closet, you were too deep in your thoughts to realize that the closet door was a little open. And when you passed it, a hand came out of the door and grabbed onto you. You didn't even have time to scream. The hand pulled you into the closet and closed the door behind you before you even had time to react. The closet was dimly lit and filled with cleaning supplies such as brooms and chemicals. The smell inside wasn't as bad as the smell outside though. You were about to fight back when you saw the person who had grabbed you.

It was JJ. He was smirking at you as he watched you catch your breath.

"What the hell?" You whisper - yell, scared that someone you know this time could hear you.

"We should really stop meeting like this." He said, the stupid smirk you liked so much still on his lips.

You had to remind yourself you were upset with him. "We didn't meet like this. You kidnapped me."

JJ rolled his eyes, the same stupid smirk on his lips. You had to admit, he looked so hot right now. He had a black shirt on with gray swim trunks. His hair was a fluffy mess and his scars were still apparent. He looked like a mess but you still wanted to kiss him. You wanted to scream. You asked yourself, what was wrong with you?

"You can leave any time you want." JJ countered, pointing towards the closed door.

You looked to the door, then back at him. "Tell me what you want and then I will."

JJ nods, finally feeling like he might have a good chance in explaining his stupid actions. "I know I didn't call you and I'm sorry. I didn't know if you wanted everyone to know about us or not."

You felt a smile on your lips. You wished he could be more mean. You liked JJ too much. Still defending yourself, you acted difficult. "You're right. We shouldn't tell anyone until we figure this," you said, motioning between the two of you. "out."

JJ nodded, this time, his smirk turning into a full smile. "So there is something?"

You roll your eyes, still acting a little difficult. "I never said that."

JJ steps forward, closer to you, and looks down at your lips. "I think that's exactly what you said."

You shook your head. "Stop." You didn't mean it. JJ smirks, biting his lip. You wanted to scream again. What the hell was this boy doing to you? In seconds, you could go from completely angry at him, to wanting to kiss him. No one ever made you feel like this. Yet again, you were so surprised to find yourself liking JJ Maybank. A boy that 72 hours ago, you didn't even care about.

"Stop what -?" JJ was about to ask you something and be annoying but you weren't in the mood.

In seconds, your arms were wrapped around his neck and you were pulling him closer to you. The second your lips touched, it was as if no time passed at all. You were no longer worried about fighting with JJ and pretending you were mad. You got lost when you kissed him. And it still felt so wonderful, even after all that's happened. When you kissed JJ, it was as if there was no one else. It was just you and him. He made kissing, even in a janitor's closet, the best thing to ever happen to you.

JJ's arms snake around your waist as he pulls you closer. Now, you're chest to chest. You can feel his heartbeat through his chest and you're sure he can feel yours too. It comforts you to know he reacts the same way to you kissing him.

You break away for one second, trying to catch your breath. JJ doesn't give you a chance to breathe though because the second you break away, his lips are on your cheek, kissing his way down to your neck. Your knees go weak. This gives JJ the opportunity to push you up against the wall. There's a bunch of equipment in here but you guys make it work. His hands rest on the sides of your waist as his lips travel to your collarbone. You tilt your head back and close your eyes again. And you thought kissing JJ on the lips was the best thing ever.

Although you loved this, you wanted to feel his lips on yours again and desperately cupped his face and moved it away from your neck and back onto your lips. Right before your lips touched his again, you kissed his jaw once. You could tell this had a huge effect on JJ because his hands instinctively came up to cup your jaw. Once your lips touched, your hands moved to his chest again and they rested there as you continued to make out.

He still tasted good which surprised you the most. You rarely had a good story of a Pogue kissing someone and them saying they tasted like mint so this only made you kiss him deeper.

Finally, you both had to break away. You both were running out of air. You were breathing too heavily but didn't notice until JJ pulled away first. As you both caught your breath, you looked at eachother. You were both smiling so wide, your cheeks were starting to hurt. This reminded you of last night, when you both were smiling like madmen after your first kiss. And still, after so many other kisses, it still felt like the first time.

"Is it always like that?" JJ asked, quieting chuckling. He was wiping the gloss he had on his lips, something you had on your lips before they were wiped off.

You shook your head. "Never."

JJ smirked. "I'd say I'm the best kisser you've had."

You rolled your eyes. It was the truth but you would never admit it. "I haven't kissed many people."

JJ raised his brows, creases forming on his forehead. "How many people have you kissed?"

You bit your bottom lip. They were still tingling from JJ's kisses. "None of your business."

JJ rolled his eyes. "Don't you wanna know how many I have kissed?"

You did. But you couldn't let him know that. "No. I have my own guesses."

JJ smiled. "Yeah? What's your guess?"

You shrugged. "Like one hundred thousand or something."

JJ laughed aloud. You didn't care if anyone heard this time, you loved hearing him laugh. "Nice try. It's actually one million."

You knew he was joking just by the tone of his voice. "Ah, makes sense."

JJ raised his brows again. "So, your saying I'm a good kisser?"

You rolled your eyes. "I just meant you have a lot of practice. Doesn't mean you're good."

JJ nodded, a sly smirk on his lips. "If I'm so bad, why do you want to kiss me?"

You smiled, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck. "Someone's gotta teach ya."

You leaned forward and kissed him once again. He instantly kissed you back, his hands wrapping around your waist. The kiss only lasted five seconds but you savoured it. JJ was a good kisser, even though you didn't want to admit it. He was passionate and strong, something you had never experienced with anyone you kissed.

Once you pulled away from him, he spoke again. "Can I come by your house at, like, seven?"

You squint your eyes at him. "Yeah, sure. Why?"

JJ shrugged. "We can't go out together. I just kissed you in a janitor's closet. You deserve some food at least."

I smiled. "Okay. I'll wait for you at my house at seven. Do you know where I live?"

JJ nodded. "I mowed your lawn in May."

You pushed your brows together. "Seriously?" How the hell did you not remember this?

JJ nodded. "I don't expect you to remember. You were hanging out with Sarah and it was only for one weekend."

You shrugged, frowning at him. "I'm sorry. I'm sure I would've said hi."

Although you said this, JJ and you both knew that this was not true. You barely acknowledged his existence until last night so it wasn't a surprise to either of you that you forgot he mowed your lawn.

"It's okay. I got an amazing view of your bedroom window from where I was." JJ joked, snickering softly.

You gasped, slapping him on the chest. "Perv!"

JJ continued to laugh, clutching his chest. "Sorry!"

You shook your head laughing along with him. Once your laughter died down, you spoke, "I'm gotta go. Kiara and Pope are probably wondering where I am. See you soon."

JJ nodded. "See ya."

You both looked at each other and smiled one more time, before you opened the closet door and ran back to the waiting room. For the second time since you met JJ, you made sure not to say goodbye. It wasn't goodbye yet.

~

John B. had woken up soon after you entered the waiting room. Kiara had asked you where your coffee was and you made up an excuse , saying you drank it on your way here. You hoped it didn't look too suspicious as JJ returned only moments later, saying there was a line to get onto the bathroom. You wanted to slap him for coming up with such a lame excuse but yours wasn't any better.

Once John B. was woken up, Kiara, Pope, and JJ visited him while you waited outside for them to finish. Although you knew John B. was a nice guy, you were still nervous to meet him. After they exited his room, it was your turn.

Your first encounter with John B. was excellent. Even though he was still groggy, he was polite and super enthusiastic about meeting you. Apparently Sarah had said such nice things. And the way John B. and Sarah looked at each other, you knew that they were in love. You were so happy for her. You told John B. that if he needed anything, you were there for him but apparently that wasn't necessary. Ward had decided to foster John B. which meant he was going to start to live with Ward, Sarah and their family. You had known about John B.'s predicament with the foster care system so you were relieved to hear this.

Once John B. was ready to be discharged, Ward got John B. and Sarah into the car before asking if you needed a ride. Ward was like your uncle so you, of course, said yes.

When we dropped you off at your house, your parents still weren't home. You had an older sibling who was probably out with their friends so you had the house to yourself. This meant you had hours to spend stressing about when JJ would come. You planned your outfit and makeup before anyone got home because you were really nervous. You wondered what food he would bring, what he would want to do in your room, and just about everything down to the last detail. It was friday night, so your parents wouldn't be home until midnight. Friday nights were their date nights.

Your older sibling would probably be in their room all night so at least you didn't have to worry about them. All you had to worry about was yourself.

You rearrange your room about five times. At first, the stuff on your cabinet was too messy, then it seemed too clean. You didn't want JJ to think you had gone through all this trouble to clean for him. Then you messed it up too much. You made your head, then messed it up to look like you had been sitting in it all day. You threw all of your stuffed animals from when you were a child in your closet. You would die of embarrassment if JJ saw any of your stuffed animals. The teasing would never end.

You busied yourself with TV and reading until 6pm rolled by. You decided one hour gave you enough time to get ready. You took a quick shower and did some simple makeup. You didn't want to put too much effort in. You over thought everything. You changed your top from the tank top to a long sleeve grey shirt but you kept your black ripped jean shorts. The sun was setting and it was getting chilly. You dried your hair and kept it down and you sprayed yourself with ungodly amounts of perfume. You were stressing too much.

Finally 7pm rolled around. And JJ was five minutes late. A small voice in your head told you that he had bailed on you for real this time but you chose not to listen to it. He would be here.

Just when you were about to believe that small voice, you heard a knocking on your bedroom window. Confused, you ignored it but when the second knock came from your window, you decided to check it out. What you saw made you laugh. JJ was climbing up your wall, a backpack around his shoulders. You were gripping the bones growing from your house to pull himself closer to your window. When he looked up to see you, he smirked.

You opened your window and reached out your hand. He was close enough for you to take it and you pulled him up. You could only get him halfway through the window. Your arm was aching and you had to let him go. It didn't matter because after you let go, he pushed his way through.

Finally, when he got all the way through, you spoke, "Are you alright?"

JJ shrugged. "Only a little internal bleeding."

You rolled your eyes and quickly slapped his shoulders. "What the hell were you thinking? Don't you know how to use the front door?"

JJ laughed. "I thought climbing through your window would make me look cooler."

You shook your head. "It made you look dumber."

JJ dropped his backpack on the floor. "You can never say I didn't almost die for you."

You rolled your eyes. "Now I'm wishing I didn't pull you up."

"Ah," JJ chuckled, bending over and unzipping his backpack. "then you wouldn't have this." He then pulled out a brown bag, waving it in your face.

You quickly grabbed it from him. "What is it?" You answered your own question by opening the brown bag and pulling out Chinese food. Inside were containers of noodles, chicken balls, and rice. Your mouth watered. You felt like you hadn't eaten all day.

JJ chuckled. "Someone's hungry."

You placed the food on your desk, moving your papers and laptop to the side. "That's the only reason I wanted you to come."

You moved across your room to get a second chair for JJ and once you gave it to him, you both sat down to eat.

JJ pulled out the plastic forks and knives and gave one set to you. You took it eagerly and opened up the first container with noodles. You both started to eat.

JJ scoffed at your response. "You only wanted me here so I could bring you food?"

You nodded, your mouth filled with noodles already. Once you swallowed, you spoke. "Of course."

JJ shrugged. "Honestly, I only came here to get laid. I knew Chinese food was the way to your heart."

You scoffed, setting down your fork to slap JJ on the shoulder again.You knew he was joking so you played along. "Asshole. Now you're definitely not getting laid."

JJ rolled his eyes, but said nothing. He shoved another fork of noodles in his mouth and you did the same. You both talked throughout the meal. Whenever your mouths were empty, you responded to each other and spoke. You spoke about so many things. You talked about school, your families and eventually got to the subject of John B. and how he was holding up in Sarah's home. JJ joked about how jealous he was but you knew he was serious. You told him not to worry and one day maybe he'd have a big house like Ward's. He said nothing for a while after that and you knew why. He didn't believe he'd ever get out of the situation he was in now.

You wanted to make him feel better but you didn't know how. So, you kissed him. It was slow and passionate and it made you feel light as a feather. You couldn't believe kissing someone could feel this good.

Once you broke away from each other, JJ spoke first. "I'm guessing one."

You knew this was a way to divert from what you were talking about before but you were still confused. "What?"

"I'm guessing you've only kissed one person." JJ clarified, placing his fork down and reaching up to brush some hair out of your face.

The two of you were still sitting beside each other at your desk but your eyes instinctively made a glance at your bed. Once you looked back at JJ, you answered him. "You're wrong. It's actually two."

JJ snickered. "That's adorable."

You pinched his arm and you smiled when he yelped out in pain. "Ass."

"This is where you ask me." JJ pointed out, his hand resting on your knee.

You rolled your eyes. "I seriously have no idea."

JJ shrugged his shoulders. "It's ten."

You furrowed your brows. That seemed so low. "Ten?" JJ could tell you were confused.

"I don't really kiss many people. Makes me feel weird." JJ shrugged again, picking up his fork and taking the last bite of a chicken ball.

"Weird?" You questioned.

"Yeah," JJ nodded before swallowing and continuing. "I have to really like someone to kiss them."

You blushed, looking away from him. That meant he really liked you because all you had been doing was kissing. Your throat felt so dry. JJ really was making you nervous.

"You really like me?" You asked, looking back at him and leaning forward.

JJ smirked, leaning forward to kiss you quickly. "Yes."

"What was your first kiss like?" You asked, grabbing his hand.

He looked at where your hands touched, then looked back at you. "I was like twelve. It was Kie's cousin visiting from Canada or something. She was my age. I was shitting my pants." JJ smiles as he retells the story. You leaned forward, very interested. "I never thought about girls before that and then we were just goofing around and she asked me if I kissed anyone. I said no and then she just kissed me."

"Aw," You cooed, smiling softly. "That's adorable."

JJ shrugged, smiling. "Not really. The poor girl never talked to me again. Said I had bad breath."

You giggled. "I know what she means."

JJ gasped. "Really?"

Before you had time to react, JJ stood up and leaned on top of you, his hands instantly going to your sides to tickle you. Your legs shut up and you dashed across your room but he soon caught up to you and grabbed a hold of your sides. You screamed in terror and demanded he let you go. He couldn't completely understand you though because you were laughing so hard. You kicked his shin and made a run across your bed but before you could get to your door, he tackled you, pushing you onto your bed.

"JJ!" You laughed, JJ continuing to tickle your side. You kicked and screamed but it was no use, you were stronger.

"Say I'm the best kisser!" He only laughed, loving that you were so ticklish.

"You're the best!" You screamed, laughed hysterically. "Stop!"

Finally he stopped and lay on his back. He was laughing so hard and you were out of breath from the screaming. Once you caught your breath, you turned onto your stomach and let a hand rest on his chest.

"That wasn't funny." You frowned, a smile showing through.

JJ shrugged. "Got you to admit the truth though."

You leaned closer to his face. "Whatever."

JJ instantly closed the gap, kissing your lips. This time, your legs were intertwined as you kissed. JJ's hands cupped your face as you kissed and your hands made their way to his waist. You just lay there, kissing each other. This was so easy. Being with JJ was so easy. You couldn't believe that this is what you were missing. This time, although he tasted like mint, he smelled divine. You didn't know what it was until you parted. Once you did, you realized it was sea salt. Ye smelled like the ocean. Your mom was always telling you that you smelled like the ocean and how bad it was but now, you had found someone who was the same.

This made you want to kiss him again. You never got a chance to because JJ spoke, "what was your first kiss like?"

You smiled, touching your lips. JJ watched you for a moment, smiling at you. Your lips felt as if they were on fire.

"I was like ten and some boy at my summer camp dared me to kiss him. Worst three seconds of my life. Yours was so cute."

JJ smirked, raising his brows. "He dared you to? He must've really liked you."

You shrugged. "I can never turn down a dare."

JJ smirked. "Really?"

You nodded, a mischievous grin on your lips. "Yeah."

"Well then," JJ smirked. "I dare you to kiss me again."

You rolled your eyes. "I would've done it anyways."

And with that, you kissed him again. You don't know how long that kiss lasted because right after that one, JJ kissed you again and again. He kissed you like you guys had all the time in the world. And you felt like you did.

You knew you had all the time in the world to discover this new feeling with JJ.

~

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[coeurdastronaute]

Essays in Existentialism: Boss

Prompt.. Lexa and Clarke sleep together one night, the next morning Clarke comes in to start her new job and turns out Lexa will be her boss (basically how Meredith and Derek first meet in grey's anatomy) yeah cool...love your writing

The tiny townhouse on the corner of Grant and Lincoln was nearly unpacked, but still occupied the unfinished zone of moving in. The furniture was there, with boxes opened and in various states of emptied. Sheets were tossed on the bed, but it wasn’t made. Clothes were rooted through and half hung in the closet at the top of the stairs. The only things in the fridge were little Chinese take out boxes and a handful of sauce packets. 

But that didn’t mean a thing to the bodies on the couch. 

Well tired and sated, the two tangled torsos and limbs hung and clung to each other on the small area, not having much to discuss the night before, but rather making the other body too tired to hear and speak and think, and thus fell asleep in a knot. It wasn’t many hours of sleep between the bar and the sex and the moment one of the bodies shifted and the otehr fell to the floor with a thud. 

“Ow.” 

“What was--”

“Just my back. And hip. And… head,” the body on the floor wheezed slightly, wincing against the pain. 

“Oh shit, it’s daylight,” Clarke squinted toward the windows witn no curtains or blinds and realized how late it was. “Oh fuck!”

“Seems to be.” 

The body on the couch sat up and hopped over the back before snatching the blanket and carefully wrapping it around her naked body. 

“I have to go. I have work...um…”

“Lexa,” she sat up from the floor, propping herself up on her elbows and looking up over the cushions. 

Completely naked, the girl on the floor smiled and pushed away a mess of hair while Clarke looked at her and blushed and tried not to look, desperately. She wanted to look, but that would distract her from the process of getting ready, and Clarke had to get to work. It was her first day, after all, beautiful naked sex god be damned. 

“Right. Lexa. Nice to meet you, but I have to--”

“Yeah, of course,” she nodded, tugging a pillow in front of herself to shield as much nakedness as possible. “Do you live here?” 

“Just moved.” 

“Cool. From where.” 

“I really have to-- It was fun and all--”

A pair of blank panties were held up from the floor by hands attached to a mischievous hand oddly victorious grin. Clarke remembered the same smile somewhere between the whiskey and tequila, the smile nd the eyes and the intent way the stranger in the bar listened to her words. More importantly, she remembered the fragments of the sex and the things that mouth could do and that was the reason for the victory, and it was deserved. 

“But you have to go to work,” Lexa repeated. 

With a graceless motion, Clarke reached over the couch and snatched the offending lingerie before agreeing full-heartedly. 

“It was nice to meet you, Lexa,” Clarke promised. “But when I come back downstairs, you’ll be gone, and I’ll be on my way to work.” 

“Right. Work. I should, too. It was nice, to uh, do this. Maybe we can again--”

The offer was barely acknowledged as Clarke hopped up the stairs and toward the shower, leaving Lexa smiling somewhat, amused at the display before she looked down at herself and chuckled at what the past five minutes of her life looked like. 

XXXXXXXXXX

It was incredibly stupid. It was monumentally stupid. It was the dumbest thing she’d ever done, or at least very close to the top of the long list. But after three weeks of refusing to unpack the house and dealing with the question of employment, Clarke couldn’t handle it any longer, and joined the land of the living again. Perhaps a bit too hard, which was, above all else, stupid. Incredibly stupid. 

Clarke didn’t have too much time to think about anything else as she sprinted into the tall building that had its own distinct imprint on the city. Hair a mess and shirt sloppily in the process of being tucked in, she flashed her badge and rushed toward the elevators as she repeated how stupid it’d been to get absolutely drunk and hook up with a stranger on the couch, and then not setting an alarm, for her first day of her dream job. 

Again and with emphasis, Clarke was an incredibly stupid and gay individual. 

“Ms. Griffin,” the receptionist greeted her with a smile. “I’ve been instructed to ask that you wait right here until Ms. Moore is finished with her phonecall.” 

“Right, of course,” Clarke nodded as she attempted to underplay how extravagantly winded she was. 

Grateful for the moment to process, Clarke took a seat in the reception and processed what the past hour of her life looked like. She somehow woke up and kicked out a very naked woman from her house, that she could almost remember the name of somewhat. And she’d run across town and made it to work. On time, or at least on time enough for her boss. 

Only when she’d caught her breath did Clarke realize that she never got Le-- La-- Lara? Lena? Larry? Fuck. She never got the stranger’s number. 

“Hey, Clarke, thanks for your patience.” 

The woman who interviewed her twice finally walked out from behind the hallowed doors of Woods Publishing, and Clarke gave up trying to remember and prayed she did not smell like as much tequila as she’d inhaled the night before. 

“I’m so happy to be here, Ms. Moore,” she grinned and shook the outstretched hand. 

“Luna is fine. We’re the creatives,” she winked and led Clarke toward the door. “We get a little more freedom than the stuffed shirts in editing and sales.” 

As they moved down the hall, there was a minute smell of weed, and Clarke realized that this job was going to be better than she’d ever imagined. 

“I thought for your first day, I’d kind of get you set up, take you to our morning huddle and pitch meetings, and then after lunch make you meet everyone in a super awkward and invasive department bash.” 

“Bash?” 

“Yeah, well, people stop coming when I call them meetings and ice-breakers. I’ve decided to rename things different, more fun words to trick them into the same meetings.” 

“How’s it going so far?” 

“Amazingly well. Just wait until you see the turn out for your meet-and-greet… I mean bash.” 

Clarke couldn’t help but smile. Her boss was calm and cool, funny and approachable, and most importantly, she was clearly very into her job, which was a godsend. Hiring was often abou personality and camaraderie, as in how well a new personality would fit into a team, and Clarke already felt at home. 

The day went by easily enough, as all first days are known to do. She met her team and got her desk, got to feel out a little of how the day flowed with the promise of her assignments arrival soon enough. Luna passed her off around lunch to one of the teammates, and Clarke fell into enjoying her new coworkers with very light company gossip over not terrible sandwiches in the cafeteria. She learned all about the office romances and the merger, the new corporate structure and how great it was compared to other companies. She learned about the owner’s daughter who started a few months ago and was actually nice to work for, and more importantly, Clarke learned that there was a very lax policy when it came to punctuality. She breathed a sigh of relief. 

By the end of the day, Clarke felt like she would like it there, and was eager to help and work on drawing some of the projects. She was ready to work with the team and she was ready to finally be creative and produce something. 

“Thank you all again, for welcoming Clarke to our team,” Luna grinned and held up her glass as the rest of the team did the same. 

She was right, of course, that calling it a bash did something to make them all want to stay a few minutes later and mingle. 

“Enjoy the gift baskets sent from the studio for our last project, but within reason. And we’ll jump right in tomorrow.” 

“Thanks,” Clarke smiled and accepted a drink. 

“I’ll see you bright and early. We’ll get you started on part of our new programming and onto the new project.” 

“I can’t wait.”

Clarke found herself pulled into a conversation over artwork for the storyboard on the wall in the main rom, and even though it was technically about work, the other artists were more than eager to talk about their plans, even over drinks. 

And then she looked up and nearly spit out her drink before turning around very quickly so that her back was to the familiar green eyes and the person she’d kicked onto the floor that very morning. 

“Looks like the boss decided to make a stop. I’m going to finally ask her out,” one of the guys decided as he stood a little straighter and awkwardly fixed his hair. 

“There’s no way Lexa Woods gives you the time of day,” Raven scoffed, sipping her drink and sneaking a look at the grinning CEO. “I bet you twenty bucks she doesn’t even speak to you.” 

“She’s really nice.” 

“Oh, I know. But I bet she won’t even notice you.” 

Clarke felt the blood leave her face as she hurried to sneak another look to confirm that it was, in fact, hell freezing over. And sure enough, for some stranger reason, in a city of hundreds of thousands of people, she was in the same room as the stranger she drunkenly hooked up with sixteen hours beforehand. 

And that stranger was her boss’ boss’ boss’ boss. That stranger was Lexa Woods, CFO of Woods Publishing, daughter of the owner, inheritor to the castle. 

“What do you think, Clarke?” Raven turned toward her. Just five minutes ago, Clarke liked Raven, but now, she wanted to disappear and Raven was blocking the exit. “Think Dan here has a chance?” 

“I don’t really know anything about her,” Clarke shrugged and downed the rest of her drink, careful to stay turned around. 

She didn’t know anything about Lexa Woods, except how she tasted and the noises she made and this thing she did with her fingers that--

“She hasn’t been here long, but she’s actually not the worst, as far as suits go. She likes the creative floors. Her dad’s given her a few projects I’ve been on and I think we work pretty well together,” she explained, offering Clarke a refill. 

“Cool, cool, nice.” 

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Or you’re a very bad drinker.” 

“I, uh, had a few too many last night.” 

“Hair of the dog then,” Raven grinned and clinked their glasses. “I think I’m going to like having you around, Griffin. At least until you start asking for advanced tech and drive me crazy with your doodles. Oh shit, there he goes.” 

Despite herself, Clarke turned around and watched the illustrator move through the crowd. She looked immediately at Lexa and actually caught her eye. She held the look and she watched Lexa smile at her, though she couldn’t move to return it. Mortification was at the forefront of her brain. That and oddly proud of herself for pulling someone like Lexa Woods, even when she wasn’t on her A game. 

Only when Clarke saw Dan get close, did she look away and break the stupor she found herself stuck in. 

“I can’t believe he hasn’t figured out that she’s gay.” 

“What?”

“Dan has the worst gay-dar of all time,” Raven chuckled. “I almost feel bad taking his money. Almost.” 

Sure enough, as he walked up toward his boss’ boss’ boss, full of confidence and vim, Lexa didn’t even notice him, her eyes firmly locked on Clarke’s as she moved through the crowd, finally deciding to approach. It took a few steps before Clarke realized what was happening, and only then did she feel the two and a half drinks she’d had. 

She really didn’t like Raven. 

“I knew it.” 

Clarke didn’t say a word, but rather looked for a quick escape, though none existed and she already knew that. 

“Hey, I thought I’d come welcome you to the team personally. I’m Lexa Woods.” 

With a smile and her hand outstretched, the CEO stood there, as if she hadn’t gone down on her new employee on her couch. 

“Lexa Woods, as in…” 

“Yeah, that’s my name outside, but don’t hold it against me,” she grinned, holding the handshake a little bit longer. “It was Callie, right?” 

“Clarke.” 

“I’m sorry. Clarke.” 

“I didn’t expect to see you on my first day.” 

“Yeah,” Lexa chuckled. “I can imagine. I like hanging out down here more than upstairs. How are you, Ms. Reyes?” 

“Doing alright,” Raven nodded, appraising the scene before her. “Taking Clarke under my wing, as it were.” 

“I’d be careful,” the boss warned. “It was nice to meet you again, Clarke. I’ll see you guys later. I have a meeting I should try to get to ontime. Punctuality is key.”

Clarke burned red and nodded. 

“Nice to meet you, too, Ms. Woods.” 

“Lexa’s fine.”

“Yeah you are.” 

Lexa just smiled and waved again before disappearing. Dan joined the group a second later and passed a twenty to his friend. The boss left the room a moment later without a look back, and Clarke finally breathed. 

“So,” Raven furrowed. “When did you fuck our boss?” 

XXXXXXXXXX

For three weeks, Clarke managed to avoid all thoughts and ideas of Lexa Woods, CEO and absolute beauty. She didn’t avoid her social media, nor did she avoid much of the idle gossip about her at work, but for the most part, Clarke refused to think about her as much as possible, which amounted to about never. 

Sometimes at work, she was able to go for hours, focusing on her projects. Sometimes, Clarke found herself avoiding areas she suspected she might show up, and for three glorious weeks, she was fairly successful. 

Bent over her drawing board, Clarke found herself in a period of Lexa-less thoughts, happy to escape her life and all else, and instead find some sort of outlet for everything she’d been feeling over the past year. 

“These are very good.” 

“Fuck, you scared me,” Clarke breathed, turning around quickly. “I mean. Not fuck.”

“I’m sorry I haven’t followed up,” Lexa smiled softly, hands tied behind her back as she perused Clarke’s wall of sketches for the short they were doing. “I was out of town on business. How is your first month going, Ms. Griffin?” 

“Do you take such an interest in all of your employees, or just the ones you seduce?” 

“I believe you were the one seducing. I was drunk and adorable and you took advantage of me in my drunk and adorable state.” 

Clarke balked and grit her teeth before seeing that Lexa was making fun of her, which did nothing to calm her. 

“Someone who pins the other to their front door, is not being taken advantage of.” 

She smiled again and Clarke found it infuriating. And hot. But also infuriating a little more. 

“I did do that, didn’t I?” Lexa nodded. “I’ve been trying to figure out how to address that… trist.” 

“It was a fluke, and I think we should stay professional. Like we have.”

“I thought I was keeping it fairly professional.” 

“I just mean, you can’t-- we don’t have to talk about that… trist.” 

“Or we could?” she waited to gauge Clarke’s reaction. “Or not. Definitely not. Very professional. Just pretend it never happened.” 

“Exactly. Thank you for stopping by, Ms. Woods.” 

“Lexa is still fine. We’re going to be working together a bit. Everyone calls me Lexa.” 

“Professional,” Clarke repeated. 

“Casual, even. Professionally casual.” 

“Exactly.” 

XXXXXXXXX

“Professional,” Lexa nodded to herself and tried to catch her breath. The naked body beside her repeated the same thing with a sigh. 

“But we can’t do that again. We were just scratching an itch,” Clarke reasoned as Lexa agreed, humming along with the familiar song. 

If any of that were true, she wouldn’t have been naked in Clarke’s half-made bed, next to a full-naked girl. If she had anything to say about it, they’d be doing it much more and often and professionally. But she was the boss, and she wasn’t allowed to make that call. Clarke had to make it. And Lexa was very grateful that Clarke made it. 

It wasn’t Lexa’s fault that they enjoyed the same bar, or that they happened to notice each other, and it wasn’t her fault that she liked kissing Clarke. 

“I quite like scratching that itch with you.” 

Lexa turned her head and watched Clarke smile before regaining her composure. 

“Don’t sweet talk me, Woods. I’m your employee.” 

“Yeah, but like, only kind of.” 

Clarke turned and gave her a look before Lexa chuckled and rolled toward her, pressing her luck as she pressed against Clarke, kissing her shoulder and her neck. 

“What are we supposed to do?” Clarke turned over as well. “Go into HR and tell them we’re sleeping together?” 

“I could fire you?” 

“Lexa.”

“I could quit?” 

“Shut up.” 

“Or you could agree to go on an actual date with me, and promise not to take your clothes off.” 

“You’re the one that takes them off of me!” 

Despite her wiggling, Clarke let Lexa pull her closer. She ran her fingertips along Lexa’s cheek, squishing her cheeks together so she was making fish lips and smiled at the display, amused at herself and how Lexa let her do that. 

“I zwant tovee hrofeshinal widzth you. Vutd I sink I alike you.” 

“You sound ridiculous.” 

Lexa sighed until Clarke let go of her cheeks, unable to keep the smile there. Instead she held her chin now, between her forefinger and thumb, keeping her steady and there. Fingertips moved up and down her back. 

“I think we can do this without messing up work.” 

“How?” 

“We just don’t work together. I’ll stay off of your projects. Luna has complete control over personnel and who is on what.” 

“If it goes bad?” 

“Then I’ll definitely quit. Sell the company probably. Move to Zurich,” she decided. 

“That plan developed quickly.” 

“It’s always in my back pocket in case a beautiful girl who works for me creates a problem. I will not be caught unprepared again.” 

“Again?” 

“It’s an expression.” 

“Mmm,” Clarke smiled and nodded. 

She didn’t waste a moment. She leaned forward and kissed Lexa because she had to be certain, and she had to find some kind of bravery. She should think about it more, and she should have made a pros and cons list, but something about this moment, this person, Clarke just felt alive, and she’d been chasing it for so long. 

“Did I get the job?”

“You got a date. One date.” 

“I can work with that.”

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - Rapunzeltopia

This episode, much like many other plot important episodes of the first two seasons, is decent on it its own, but becomes retroactively worse due to season three’s bad writing and behind the scenes bullshit. 

Summary:  Matthews reveals himself as another dark spirit and disciple of Zhan Tiri, and traps Eugene, Lance and the others in unbreakable vines similar to the Great Tree's evil magic. He has Rapunzel live the perfect life while he prepares to hand over the mystical powers of the Sundrop to his master. Fortunately, Rapunzel is able to make contact with her brown-haired dream self and attempts to convince her to let go. 

Timeline Alert

So what does almost a year ago mean? The Great Tree was six months out, and then in Mirror, Mirror, Lance said that they been fighting for three weeks since. So how long have then been stuck in this shell house? Because You’re Kidding Me was just the next day after Mirror, Mirror. Was Lance’s ‘three weeks’ comment meant to be after Brothers Hooks and Rapunzel: Day One and not Great Tree? Are we 7, 8, 9, or 10 months out from Secret of the Sundrop? Like be clear about your time frame guys if you’re going to use it as a plot point. 

I’m going to say we are 9 months along on this trip, just cause that sounds closer to ‘almost a year ago’ without keeping them all trapped in the shell house for months. So Great Tree is 6 months, Brother’s Hook and Rapunzel Day One is 7 months, Mirror, Mirror is going on 8 months, and at the end of this episode they’ll be heading into the 9 month period...I guess. Lets just say they were trapped there for a week or two. 

This Episode Only Highlights How Self Centered and Immature Rapunzel Still Is Rather Than Showcase How Much She’s Grown 

The point behind this episode is show how much Rapunzel has grown since season one, and how she is accepting of responsibility now, but it actually backfires because she’s not actually being challenged on her selfish desires but on her lack of agency. Which is the wrong lesson that she needs to be learning at this point in her development.

Rapunzel in her subconscious mind doesn’t wish for what’s best for other people but what’s best for herself. People she must interact with on the regular have to be superficially happy even if it completely warps their character. While people she doesn't care about, like Lady Caine, can just be simply banished and ignored regardless if they deserve such an end or not.  She doesn’t see people as people with individual thoughts and feelings, but as satellites to herself and her narrow worldview.  

 Also, ‘I believe everyone deserves a second chance’ my eye! Caine never gets even a first chance in Rapunzel’s own fantasy world. Because Rapunzel is a selfish hypocrite who’s ‘redemptions’ always comes with strings attached. 

Here Comes the Dumbest Plot Point In the Show

I’ll talk about this more when we get to season three, but this scene is the beginning of the end for any dignity the show once held. 

Also why would ‘I don’t trust anyone’ Cassandra follow a creepy voice calling her name through a doorway inside a magic house that’s tried to kill her twice now? 

If you gotta make you character act out of character in order to get your plot rolling than you haven’t a good plot. Think of something else. 

What’s the Point of Having Two Names? 

They did this both with Sugarbee and Matthews here and it makes zero sense. Why would they need to bother with fake names if the heroes wouldn’t even recognize their real names to begin with? Such revelations add nothing and fails to tell the audience anything new about the characters.  It’s also not consistent as it turns out Gothel was a disciple too and she only gets one name, so what gives? 

So How Does This All Work Again?

So Zhan Tiri needs ‘a clash of the sundrop and moonstone’ in order to be freed from her prison. Why? I don’t know, but holding Rapunzel prisoner for life actually undermines that plan, and it’s a plan that Zhan Tiri is currently setting up with Cassandra off screen during all of this. 

So does Tromus/Matthews just not know that Zhan Tiri is already ‘free’ and has her own plans?

Is Rapunzel’s power being drained what gives Zhan Tiri a foothold in the real world?

Or was Zhan Tiri released back in the Great Tree with the removal of the spear and that’s why she knows to go after Cass? 

What was up with the Great Tree and the sealed tree back in Painter’s Block? Did they have any impact on Zhan Tiri’s plans?  

Were any of the disciples actually useful at all? 

So What Do the Disciples Gain From All This?

Sugarbee, Matthews, and Gothel were all once real people who actually lived so what are their reasons for following Zhan Tiri? What do they gain from going through such complicated plans? Why continue to follow someone after you’ve been dead for centuries and are a ghost now, and were presumably trapped and or killed by Demantius for following her? Real people don’t just hold on to such fanatical devotion without reason. 

This Conflict Over Choices Does Not Work Without Varian

Going back to how this episode fails to develop Rapunzel; it wants to have Rapunzel take responsibility for difficult choices, but much like Painters Block, it completely ignores her biggest fuck up thereby undermining why she has trouble with owning up to hard choices.  

Rapunzel ruined a child’s life. She may not have meant to but she did, and thus far she has done nothing to make amends for it. She’s not even spared the poor boy a single thought beyond seeing him as the boogeyman in a nightmare once. 

You can’t have Rapunzel take responsibility for anything if you won’t hold her accountable for anything.  

Varian was meant to appear in this episode, and indeed he should have for the above reason. 

But of course Chris had to give us a bullshit excuse for why he cut the most plot important character from the series. 

I’ve already spoken about how Varian’s cameo in Happiness Is did nothing to actually further develop Rapunzel nor explore her guilt back in that review. In this episode, however, I want to discuss how hollow the comparisons to Gothel is and why there shouldn’t logically have been any competition between the two. 

Varian and Gothel provide two completely different conflicts and two completely different points of development for Rapunzel’s arc. Gothel is the instigator of her conflict with Rapunzel. Rapunzel, as the victim, has only one thing to learn, self esteem. She learned it back in the movie, she relearned it back in the season one, and here she’s re-contextualizing it for this episode’s mini-arc. 

Meanwhile Rapunzel is the instigator of her conflict with Varian. She’s the one with the power in their relationship and her choices matter. She doesn’t need to learn agency because she already has it. What she needs to learn is responsibility and she can’t do that without confronting Varian and what she did in some manner. So unlike with Gothel there only new ground to cover here rather than rehashing old conflicts. 

Chris Sonnenburg has things all backwards. Rapunzel’s agency/self-esteem issues and her need to take responsibility for her actions are not interchangeable conflicts. Addressing one does not automatically address the other, and of the two her conflict with responsibility holds more weight because it’s ongoing. We haven’t seen the resolvement there. It also affects more people than just herself so the stakes are higher there as well. And to top it all off, it fits with the themes of the episode better. 

Also, you very much could have had both characters because they both reflect different conflicts and serve different purposes in the narrative. Time management in television is a very big deal yes, but you have little grounds for defense when all you’ve shown is how poorly you’ve managed your time until now. 

In short, Chris is full of shit. 

No, It Wouldn’t

We’ve already established that there’s no need for Rapunzel to go on her quest in season two. The black rocks are inactive, there’s no ticking clock she has to beat, and her staying at home would have actually prevented the conflicts in season three. 

Unless dream Rapunzel is referring to Zhan Tiri being released, but even that is false because Zhan Tiri is already floating around a little blue ghost girl off screen right now. What Rapunzel choses or chooses not to do does not change that. 

Lack of external conflict undermines internal conflict.  

Just Cause You Make A Meta Joke About Your Heroes Being Dumb For No Reason, Does Not Make Them Any Less Stupid 

Jokingly admitting a fault in your writing doesn’t not excuse that fault. If you can’t have a plot without handing the idiot ball to your characters than you haven’t a good plot. Time to go back to drawing board. 

Season Three Will Go Back On This Episode’s Message and Prove the Villian Right

I’ve liget seen fans unironically praise the show for it’s message of ‘be content with what you have’. Not only is that a terrible lesson to teach children; it’s actually the exact opposite of what the show is trying to achieve.

“Be satisfied” is suppose to be the wrong motto. Rapunzel is suppose to be fighting against this message. In the episode itself it’s the villian who is saying such things in order to tempt her to stay put. 

So how could anyone look at the show as a whole and come away with idea that the one off villain was right along? 

Because season three does a complete 180 away from its original messages regarding agency and responsibility. All consequences disappear from the story and the mains are given convenient scapegoats to distract from their decisions. Characters actively regress and are rewarded by the narrative for either not doing anything or for victim blaming others for their actions. 

But most damaging of all is the fact that nearly everyone winds up back where they started out at, or aren’t given a proper ending at all. Tangled’s story is just one giant circle and that in of itself contradicts the idea of progress.  

Cassandra’s Hurt Hand Is Only Relevant When The Story Wants Rapunzel to Feel Guilty About Something  

Oh but we can just throw Cassandra’s burnt hand in here as a substitute Rapunzel’s guilt over Varian. Even though the two incidents should actually complement one another rather than compete for dominance. 

Tangled doesn’t trust its audience to remember things. It acts like if it’s off screen or not being focused upon than it’s not happening or isn’t relevant. This undermines any ongoing or overarching conflicts.  

Why should we care about Cassandra’s arm if she’s been shown as being fine with it for four episodes by now? Especially since it’ll never come up again after this point? And on the flip side of things, why should the audience not care about the 15 year old who has been sitting in a dungeon for almost a year now due to Rapunzel’s neglect?  

We’re not magpies who are quickly distracted by shiny new things. We are capable of retaining information and informing decisions based off of that. Especially if Chris was shooting for the teen audience as he claims he was. 

Oh But We Got Time For Godzilla-Pascal 

Can’t spare even half a minute for a Varian cameo that would be relevant, but we sure got time to waste on a pointless action sequence that does nothing to further the character in what is meant to be a character development episode. 

This Scene Is Out of Character 

That’s not how abuse works! 

The whole reason why Gothel was able to keep Rapunzel under her thumb for 18 years because Rapunzel always sought her approval. Never at any point, even when finally choosing to break away from her in the movie, did Rapunzel wish to harm the woman. That goes against who she is as a character and it’s not how abuse victims respond to abusers even after cutting things off with them. 

If anything, Rapunzel’s treatment of Frederic in Happiness Is is more in line with how a victim goes about mourning the loss of an abusive relationship. Victims grieve for what might have been. Victims mourn the loss of what good times they had with their abusers, because yes, abusers aren’t abusive 100% of the time 24/7. They can’t be or they risk losing their victim quicker.  

I initially was ok with flashbacks to Gothel on occasion because no victim ever makes a completely clean break from their abuser. Even ‘moving on’ isn’t some triumphant singular action when you stand tall while you knock your opponent down in a wish fulfilment fantasy.

No. ‘Moving on’ is slow. It’s understated. It’s routine. It’s about being able to do the dishes without getting triggered. It’s sitting at lunch with friends and being happy and calm without the fear of returning home hanging over your head. It’s not skipping out on work because your anxiety is through the roof over just meeting with your boss. It’s not devolving into a yelling match over something minor because you internalize your abusers behavior.  

Abuse victims don’t celebrate violence as strength. We celebrate being an unmovable mountain of clam fortitude. Being in control even as the world rages at us, because we’re self assured. 

The fact that this scene exists, while Happiness Is shows Rapunzel behaving the opposite way to the father who abused her the same as Gothel did, only proves that a man shouldn’t have been in charge of this show. Certainly not without a woman by his side giving equal input. 

Stop Using Destiny as a Shorthand for Everything!

Destiny isn’t a catch all word that can mean whatever you want it to. Words have definitions for a reason. Destiny isn’t a goal nor does it equate to agency and responsibility; kind of the opposite in fact. 

Well That Was Redundant

All we did was rehash Rapunzel’s season one arc in under half in hour. Nothing new was learned. It’s like writers don’t know how to resolve any conflict that isn’t a repeat of the first movie. Meanwhile actual unique conflicts are just sitting off to the side being ignored. All because the show’s creator doesn’t want to hold his precious self insert accountable for anything. 

Bye Bye Smart Cass, Hello Dumb Cass

So from this point onward the Cass we’ve known for nearly two seasons is gone. She’s just been replaced by the dumbest bitch on the planet. Because the writers don’t understand how manipulation and trauma actually works. Nor do they comprehend the importance of giving characters actual goals.  

Conclusion 

Season three is what retroactively spoils this episode. Cass’s dumb decision here, Zhan Tiri’s lack of a coherent plan, the uselessness of the disciples, and even the lack of Varian could have been glossed over had they writers given us a satisfying pay offs for any of the main conflicts. But they didn’t and so here we are. 

Also a small update, but after this review and starting next week, the Salt Marathon will go from bi weekly updates to only one a week. This is a combination of real life work getting in the way and the growing length of the reviews. This means we’ll hopefully be done come March, which would mark the show’s anniversary. I got some plans to celebrate if that works out. 

[secret-engima]

You mentioned an x-over with au and my mind automatically went ‘aeon meeting Nox and Ardyn’

Okay for THIS one I’m gonna be weird and try a fusion. Probably a bad one but HERE WE GO (note that this takes place during the early chapters of your fic? Just cause that’s what the muses wanted).

-Aeon gets thrown to Gilgamesh by a non-time-traveled Ardyn, and he still gets brutally trained by Gilgamesh but because this is a fusion and I’m feeling sappy, we’ll say the time-travel for Ardyn and Nox happened RIGHT after Aeon got thrown into the Tempering Grounds.

-It still takes Ardyn about eight months to finish sorting through the memories of this parallel dimension fused self and go OH SNAP and tear off for the Tempering Grounds with Nox on his heels.

-Aeon is in the middle of scraping what food he can from the scraggly garden when he feels the ground shake. Feels … something roll over his skin like fury and storms and ANGER and blood and hears his (tormentor) mentor howl in hatred that turns … pained?

-Aeon grabs his sword and runs to investigate. A part of him thinks to just take the chance and run, but he doesn’t think he’ll make it that far and if there is a greater threat about to come for him, he wants a chance to watch and see its weaknesses.

-Aeon is NOT expecting to see Ardyn. Ardyn wreathed in blood red flames, Ardyn with an entire armory of blades spinning around him as he tears Gilgamesh limb from limb with a tightlipped expression that Aeon thinks must be the fury he can taste in the air. Aeon decides that, as fascinating as it is to see Gilgamesh and Ardyn screaming at each other and tearing each other apart, this is a prime chance to run. So he does.

-He draws his sword and nearly beheads the person following him a second later. The sword is blocked effortlessly and blood red eyes drill into him with some emotion Aeon doesn’t care about, “Easy,” scoffs the black haired boy who must be his age, something world-weary and dark in his features that reminds Aeon of looking in a mirror, “I know a shortcut out.”

-“I don’t trust you.”

-A curl of lips, dark and feral, “You’d rather deal with all the monsters THAT,” a thumb over his shoulder at the screaming fight, “will stir up?”

-Aeon scowls as the boy slips by him, unafraid of exposing his back to Aeon just like Gilgamesh was unafraid.

-Aeon follows him out.

-He doesn’t know how long its been since he saw sunlight, just that it was too long, and for a moment Aeon has to stop and bask in it despite everything going on. The boy waits a wary distance away, watching the entrance to the Tempering Grounds and not flinching when the earth shakes. Aeon looks around and spots a campfire smoldering and something smells … good. The boy sees his look and says, “I cooked some fresh Behemoth sirloin. Figured you’d be hungry for something that didn’t come out of the ground.”

-Aeon eyes the boy warily, and for a moment considers questioning him as to why he is here, why he came, why ARDYN came and can apparently wield magic.

-Then he decides that it can wait until he’s eaten. The boy keeps watch on the entrance while Aeon eats, and Aeon is just finishing his first non-vegetable meal in months when Ardyn comes out, blood on his clothes but no wounds on his person, a dark look in his eyes that raises every hair on Aeon’s body. “There you are,” murmurs Ardyn and something in his eyes looks … off, “I feared you had died.”

-Aeon bristles, “You’re the one who threw me in there.”

-Ardyn looks away, studying the horizon line, “A grievous sin I have now rectified. There are supplies in the pack to your left, take them. Consider them a present for surviving Gilgamesh.” And Aeon wants to stab the man, wants to throw the bag at Ardyn’s head, but between one blink and the next the man is gone, vanishing into the shadows of the trees.

-The black-haired boy, who’s eyes are now blue rather than red, does not leave. He stays, and when Aeon breaks camp and leaves, he follows behind.

-Aeon snarls at him, hand on his mother’s sword hilt, “What do you want?”

-The boy blinks at him, “My name is Nox.”

-Aeon bares his teeth, his father’s fangs showing, “That’s not what I asked.”

-Another blink and thoughtful stare at the sky and then a slow, “Well. I suppose I want a friend.”

-And its the dumbest lie Aeon has ever heard, to the point where all Aeon can do is walk away in disgust.

-Nox follows him.

-It becomes a theme. Nox occasionally disappears, but never for more than a few days, then he always pops up again, falling into step in Aeon’s peripheral vision, just out of range of attack, content with the silence no matter how much Aeon tries to make him go away. Aeon thinks maybe Nox will leave once Aeon makes it to an outpost. He doesn’t.

-They end up taking Hunts together, only because Aeon can’t make him GO AWAY.

-Eventually he stops trying. Either Nox will get bored and leave or he won’t, and until then Nox follows him around, hunting extra food or helping to bring down monsters for the gil (not that Aeon NEEDS the help, but Nox listens to every demand except the one to GO AWAY)

-And so it continues for like- ten months. And eventually Aeon stops trying to make Nox go away or ignoring Nox when he finally breaks the silence between them to say something. Nox is just … always there. A constant fixture that does nothing to sway Aeon one way or another, or use him, or anything that makes SENSE.

-Sometimes he thinks about what Nox said all those months ago. About wanting a friend.

-Aeon doesn’t quite know when he started to think it just might be true. Not because it makes sense, but because nothing about Nox makes sense (he is Ardyn’s nephew, he claims, but he is so clearly an illegitimate Lucis Caelum even without the open use of magic around Aeon it’s a wonder no one else can tell) and if anyone would hang around Aeon just for … “friendship” rather than to use him as a weapon, it would be Nox. Stubborn, stupid, quiet Nox who sometimes acts just like Aeon and other times acts like someone else altogether (he’s messed up in the head, Aeon is certain, he’s seen the days Nox goes Quiet for reasons beyond Aeon refusing to have a conversation, the days Nox operates on instinct more than conscious thought).

-Aeon ignores the feeling in his chest the first time he grudgingly offers a hand to help Nox out of the dirt after a mistimed warp and Nox smiles at him with something like joy in his face. It makes no sense. But most of Nox doesn’t. So Aeon ignores it like everything else and they resume the hunt.

-Aeon doesn’t register the importance of their similar ages until well after he’s turned fifteen and a month or so after Nox mentions that he’s done the same. It really shouldn’t surprise him that they both present at the same time, when they both operate on the same routine and all, but somehow it does.

-It’s only sheer spite that keeps the two of them going to finish the hunt and not just lie down and drown in their combined emotions going EVERYWHERE, and he takes almost morbid amusement in the realization that Nox has no clue what is happening. Aeon has no patience to explain it beyond “keep fighting and we’ll deal later”.

-The two stagger back to an outpost and book a hotel room and somehow end up passing out in the same bed and for once Aeon is too freaking tired to care that Nox is within touching distance. It’s not like Nox is going to try anything, especially not when he’s just as miserable as Aeon.

-Later, after showers and joint miserable looks, they are approached by an Alpha Guide, who teaches them how to shield themselves. The Alpha Guide also gives Nox a crash course on basic biology that even Aeon knew, but apparently Nox did not as he hadn’t even known what it meant to be an Alpha Guide like Dave the Hunter.

-After they move on, Nox takes to occasionally reaching out with his emotions and mentally brushing against Aeon in affection-recognition-greeting before pulling back. Somehow, Aeon finds himself letting the slightest flickers of annoyance-greeting-affection slip out in return. Nox has grown on him, and even if the rest of the world is untrustworthy … Nox is too strange and dumb to use him as a weapon.

-And things go back to being routine. Him and Nox and occasionally Ardyn, who drops in with more supplies and news for Nox and a spar for Aeon after Aeon insists on learning how to combat the kind of red magic Ardyn uses.

-Then they overhear Niflheim Soldiers talking about their successful kidnapping of the Prince of Lucis and Nox growls, low and feral and for the first time since that day in the Tempering Grounds, Aeon can taste Rage on his tongue.

-Well. He supposes they’re off to rescue a princeling then.

(Gonna leave it here, hope you don’t mind this … basically AU drabble of your fanfic? But I wanted to try a fusion and then Nox was like “imma befriend Aeon before he ever gets revealed as Cor’s son” and so here we are. 

Also they rescue Noctis and Noctis insta-recognizes Nox as a Relative and Nox panics and Aeon thinks he’s being Dumb but they walk Noctis to Hammerhead and Aeon gets shot and Nox goes BALLISTIC over it so whoops now they’re both revealed and Regis gets to join Cor on the “my son I didn’t know I had is Feral and Abused AAAAAA” boat).

[jessi-novel-idea]

What I Always Wanted

(Sweat Pea x Jones Reader, Reggie Mantle x Jones Reader)

Description: After of summer of seeing you ex, Sweet Pea with Josie, you finally decided it is time to move on. But will your decision to make him jealous get the attention you want from Sweet Pea or will someone else draw your attention?

Warnings: Language, underage drinking, mention of sex

Word Count: 3,098

Y/N: Your name

Y/N/N: Your nickname

Y/H/C: Your hair color

Y/F/N: Your first name

Y/L/N: Your last name

A/N: I do not own the picture. This is my own writing, please don't copy it. Enjoy

The past year in Riverdale has been…well crazy. So much has happened between Jason Blossom being murdered, the black hood, Archie being arrested and the Southside being turned upside down. We all needed this summer to be relaxing and peaceful and for some it was. However, not so much for me and my boyfriend Sweet Pea. We had been dating since before Jason’s murder and had been best friends since elementary school, but when my bother Jughead became the new king of the Serpents, it put a strain on our relationship. I was devasted and Pea knew that and said he would stand by my side through it all since I was the one who was supposed to replace my dad FP when he stepped down but of course that was a lie. Everyone lies.

It had been about 3 months since school let out for summer. It was the Friday before we started back to school and I was hanging out with Fangs, Toni, Cheryl, Sweet Pea and Josie, fucking Josie, at Cheryl’s house. Sweet Pea and I broke up about two weeks into summer and he has been hooking up with Josie ever since. It honestly feels like he is rubbing it in my face that he has moved on, but I have been trying (and failing) to not let it get to me.

Cheryl had invited us all over to hang out and drink and talk about this amazing pool party she was throwing. It was hard to show excitement, but I was trying my best.

“So, Y/N/N, have your suit picked out for tomorrow?” Cheryl asked distracting me from looking at Sweet Pea and Josie in the corner.

“Um…I don’t really know which one I will wear yet…” I stuttered in response, trying to hide the fact that I didn’t really want to go, knowing I would have to be around all the happy couples.

“You know instead of the longing stares that will get you nowhere with him, you could make him jealous.” Cheryl said raising her eyebrow at me.

“And what exactly do you have in mind Cheryl?”

“I could let you borrow one of my suits and maybe a little make over?”

Cheryl has been begging me to let her give me a makeover to lift my spirits like some cheesy teenage movie, maybe it would make me feel better, maybe I would regret it, who knows. I think I have resisted long enough, “Ok, fine, let’s do it”

Cheryl lunged at me and gave me a tight hug, “Thank you Y/N/N, you won’t regret it,” she said with a devilish grin.

“I think I already am” I said with a little laugh.

I had agreed to letting Cheryl and Toni come over a couple hours before the party to do the makeover. I was getting more and more nervous as the time got closer to when they should be here. This was definitely a bad idea.

There was a knock at my door, pulling me from my thoughts. I walked over opening the door to Cheryl and Toni, both with several bags each. Oh boy, I thought to myself.

“Think you brought enough stuff Cher?”

“I brought options, and you will thank me in the end,” Cheryl responded with smirk

“There is nothing you can say to ruin her mood today, she is so excited you finally agreed to this.” Toni said laying down the things she was carrying on my bed.

“Well, I think I am finally ready to move on and make him realize what he is missing”

“That’s my girl, and trust me when I am done with you he will be begging you to take him back.” Cheryl said pulling the swim suit options from a bag.

It had been about an hour and a half since they got there and I had successfully chosen a black two-piece suit with straps.

I would have preferred a one piece, but that wasn’t an option apparently. Cheryl and Toni had both assured me that I looked hot and no one would be able to keep their eyes off of me.

Cheryl had just finished curling my Y/H/C hair and finished my make-up, which was way to bold for a pool party, but there was no talking Cheryl out of it.

I walked into the living room, where Cheryl and Toni were waiting, in the final look including the red heels Cheryl insisted on. They stopped talking and just stared at me.

“What, not good, I knew I couldn’t pull off this look, I will just go change…” I rambled on when I was cut off my Toni.

“Y/F/N Y/L/N, shut up babe, you look sexy as hell” Toni stated motioning for me to turn around.

“You think so?” I said trying to cover up a little.

“Yes, you are going to be the envy of everyone there, I might even have to keep a tighter grip on TT here,” Cheryl said with a laugh

“Thanks Cheryl…for this,” I said shyly motioning to my outfit with my hands.

“Anytime doll, well we better be heading out, see you there?” Cheryl said gathering her things and Toni.

“Yeah I will be there in a little bit”

You showed them out and went to gather your coverup and towel and put them in a bag and pulled on some jean shorts and a tank and grabbed my keys and headed toward Thornhill.

It was already crowded by the time I got there, Toni had text me to let her know when I got there and she would come meet me. So, I did and I waited in my car until I saw her approach, looking gorgeous as always.

“Could you ever look bad” I joked getting out of my car.

“Nope” she said with a smile, looking mw up and down “you are a little over dressed”  

“I didn’t want to drive in just the suit”

“Well, go ahead and take some layers off…let everyone see what they are missing” she said nudging my side. I took of my shorts and tank, putting them in my bag.

As we walked to the pool I was already getting stares from people, most of their gazes landed on my left rib cage where one of my serpent tattoos was. “What if he still doesn’t notice me?” I stated looking concerned.

“He will either realize he made a huge mistake or you will be able to finally be able to move on, Pea is an idiot, him letting you go in the first place is the dumbest thing he has ever done.”

“I hope you are right” As we walked onto the deck it felt like everything was in slow motion, as more and more people started to stare. I was starting to feel more and more confident until I froze in my place making Toni run it to my back.

“What the hell Y/N/N?” She questioned the noticed I was starting at something so she followed my gaze to see Sweet Pea place his hand on Josie’s thigh and go in for a kiss...

“I guess it is time to move on, right?” I said trying to stop the disappointment from showing on my face and in my voice.

“I am sorry Y/N/N.”

“Not your fault T, let’s find me a place to lay in the sun” I said with a half-hearted smile.

I found a chair near where Cheryl and Toni were sitting. I lounge in the sun with my headphones in letting everything else drift away. That was until I notice the sun disappear suddenly above me. Opening my eyes and removing my sunglasses I looked up to see none other than Reggie Mantle standing over me.

“Hey, Y/N,” he said with a smirk

“Hey, Reg, what can I do for you?”

“I don’t think you want me to answer that honestly,” he flirted sitting down by my legs

“You are probably right”

“I just wanted to see if you would like some company, maybe we could grab a beer?” He seemed nervous which was so out of character for him.

“Sure” He was surprised by my answer, since we didn’t necessarily get along and given his history with Pea. He stood and extended his hand to help me up. “Thanks”

We walked over to where the kegs were under a tent and Reggie got himself and me a drink.

“You are so beautiful Y/N/N” He stated, I wasn’t quite sure if I heard him right

“Uh, thanks” I stuttered, blushing slightly

“You don’t take compliments very well, do you?”

“No, it has just been a while since someone has said I was beautiful”

“That is a shame. What happened between you two, anyway” he said nodding in Sweet Pea’s direction, “if you don’t mind me asking, it’s just that you two looked so happy.”

I took a deep breath deciding if I wanted to tell Reggie Mantle of all people the story, I mean no one knew the whole story outside me and Pea. “He thought he could do better”

“And Josie is the better?”

“Didn’t you try to get with Josie,” I asked raising and eyebrow at him

“Yeah, but I was single, I wouldn’t think Pea is the type to just break up for a hook up prospective”

“I didn’t either, but I was wrong…I was having a hard time after Jughead becoming the new Serpent King, I was mad and felt rejected by my dad. I was supposed to lead the Serpents, not him.”

“I didn’t know that” he said shaking his head slightly and looking down at his beer.

“Not many people did, I just felt like everything I had been working toward was ruined and I thought Sweet Pea would have been on my side given how much he doesn’t like Jug, but he quickly turned on me saying I should let it go…we grew apart a little then one night he called me and said he wanted to see if there was something better out there. That was really the last time I talked to him.” My voice cracked and I felt a tear escape

Reggie reached forward and wiped the tear away with his thumb. “He is dumber than I thought if he thinks there is someone better than you out there”

“Why are you being so nice to me, Reggie?”

“I have liked you for a while Y/N/N, but since you were with Pea I didn’t stand a chance with you.”

“Why now?”

“Seeing you in that suit today, made me realize that I needed to act on my feelings quick before someone else swooped in and got your attention” he stated taking a stepping closer to me, I felt my cheeks get warm.

“Well I am glad you did” where was this confidence coming from?

“You are? Well, would you like to get out of here?”

“Sure…”

“Y/N, Serpent meeting now” Fangs interrupted, I rolled my eyes, he always has the best timing

“Sorry, could you give me a few minutes this shouldn’t take too long?” I asked Reggie

“Sure,” he said putting his hand on my hip and placed a quick kiss to my forehead, “I will be over there with Archie when you are done” I just nodded and walked off.

Fangs, Sweet Pea, Toni, Cheryl, Betty, Jughead and myself were all standing around in a secluded part of the remains of the mansion discussing our next move against the Ghoulies, especially now that Fangs had seen Hot Dog with them. Our plan was to go back after sundown and get him, No Serpent Left Behind, even the mascot. Pea had agreed to pick all of us up later.

The meeting was over and I was walking away when a hand grabbed my elbow spinning me around.

“What do you want Pea?”

“Lookin’ awfully friendly with Mantle” he stated clenching his jaw

“That isn’t really any of your damn business is it Pea?”

“Why are you being like this Y/N/N?”

“BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO SEE IF THERE WAS SOMEONE BETTER!” I yelled at him turning the heads of Toni and Fangs who looked shocked to hear what Pea had done, but then they walked off leaving Pea and I alone.

“I am sorry, shouldn’t have said it like I did…”

“You shouldn’t have said it at all, you promised me to be there for me then you let me down” I cut him off. “Just run back to Josie, she always seems happy to be with you” I rolled my eyes and walked off.

“She ended it and I screwed up” He said barely above a whisper when I was out of earshot

I walked over to Reggie and told him I had a few hours to kill. We decided to grab Pop’s and headed to my place to watch a movie. Only we didn’t end up watching a movie. I had only been with Pea before, but being with Reggie felt good and helped me forget about everything. We were still lying in bed naked, I had my head resting on Reggie’s chest listening to him breathe. He was drawing random shapes on my back.

Reggie broke the silence that engulfed us…”do you think we will do this again?”

“I honestly don’t know” I said rolling over and checking my phone to see what time it was and saw a message in the younger Serpent group text that said Pea was on his way to pick everyone up. “Ugh, sorry Reggie but I have to get ready for some Serpent business.”

“That’s alright I should probably get home anyway.”

After we got dressed I walked Reggie to the door, we were saying our goodbyes on the porch when he pulled me into a passionate kiss that took me by surprise. “Talk to you later, Y/N/N”

“Later Bulldog” I said with a smile as I watched him walk down the stairs, that’s when I saw Pea’s truck waiting in the driveway, so I grabbed my jacket and headed to his truck.

Our Serpent business was handled pretty quickly, we got Hot Dog back. Cheryl shot Malachi with an arrow which didn’t go over too well but overall a normal night. Fangs took Hot Dog home, then Pea dropped Toni and Cheryl off, then Betty and Jughead, so it was just me and Pea.

We sat in awkward silence for most of the ride back to my house, but when we crossed the bridge into the Southside he broke the silence. “Are you happy with him?”

“With who?” I said, not really paying attention to him

“Reggie?”

“I am not WITH him Sweets” emphasizing with, I also saw him flinch a little out of the corner of my eye when I called him Sweets, it felt weird rolling off my tongue too. I usually only called him that when we were cuddled together in bed.

“It seemed like you were with him, when he kissed you on your porch earlier” He said looking straight ahead, but I glanced over at him and studied his face, he was clearly hurt.

“Why do you care Pea, you ended it remember? And I have had to watch with  Josie all summer, and listen to you talk about how great she is…I can’t do it anymore” I could feel all the emotions rushing to the surface.

“I guess I didn’t think about how it would affect you”

“Really, of course it would affect me, I loved you and I still do and probably always will. When you told me, you wanted to see if there was someone better, it broke me, I didn’t want to accept the fact that you obviously didn’t love me anymore. It crushed me Pea” I was full on crying at this point and hadn’t realize he had pulled up at my trailer. When I looked over at him he was staring at me, clearly trying to find the right words or any words for that matter.

“I was an idiot to ever think that there was someone better then you out there, because you are perfect Y/N/N. I was so scared of how I felt about you.” He stopped and looked at me and I could see tears in his eyes.

“Pea if you cared so much for me how could you let me go” when he didn’t respond I got out of the truck slamming the door and basically running inside shutting the door behind me. I slid down to the floor. My back to the door, tears falling freely. I heard the door of his truck close and the distinct sound of his boots in the gravel leading to my door. He climbed the stairs and knocked on the door. I didn’t respond. I couldn’t respond. Then I heard him.

“Y/F/N Y/L/N, I was too stupid to realize that what I always wanted was what I already had. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness or a second chance, but I am begging you princess, please…but, if nothing else just let me hold you one last time” His voiced cracked and I could tell he was having a hard time saying what he wanted to say.

A few moments passed and I stood and opened the door looking up at the boy I loved and realizing he was what I always wanted too, but I wasn’t sure I could let him back into my heart. I wasn’t sure I could forgive him. “I…don’t…know if I can forgive you…or forget what you said to me…but I can’t lose you either” I stuttered and sniffed through the tears.

“I will do whatever it takes to earn your forgiveness, I love you.”

Those last three words made my heart flutter. I smiled and rushed forward to wrap my arms around his torso inhaling the scent of him that instantly calmed me. “I love you too Pea and I want to figure out a way for us to be together again, but it may take time.”

“I am willing to put in the time for you Y/N” he said kissing the top of my head.

We stayed in our embrace for a long while, afraid to let go, afraid the other would just disappear. We both knew it wouldn’t be easy moving forward, we weren’t sure we even could. But we also both knew we loved each other and we were what the other always wanted and sometimes you have to work for that.

[gentlemanmendes]

Beauty behind the Madness | 21|

Previous chapters can be found in my masterlist under beauty behind the madness sorry tumblrs being a bitch so I have to give you guys the link making the post look ugly but here ya go https://gentlemanmendes.tumblr.com/post/154438057583/masterlist

21:

Arleigh had that look on her face for the past three hours, the look when she wanted to say something and with all her might was holding it back. Her face always contoured with her brows knitting together, her nose scrunching up, and her lips pressed into a thin line as she bit down on her cheeks as if that would stop her from talking. It's small things like this, when I know what each of her gestures and expression mean, that hurts the most. All this pointless stuff I spent six years learning about Arleigh was suddenly pointless. It's like I wasted six years on studying her for absolutely nothing.

I throw my car keys and room key on the table as I attempt to busy myself by emptying my pockets even though I know they are already empty. Arleigh seems to have the same idea, after she puts down her art journal and pencils that I had gifted her with earlier before shuffling through her bag helplessly. Neither of us had said much all afternoon but I figured it was because Arleigh was feeling as tired as I was. I had never liked driving long distances, I always felt like they dragged on pointlessly, and have driven way too much in the past twenty four hours for my liking but to see the reaction on Arleigh's face today, I would do it all over without hesitation for her.

After she had finished drawing Arleigh had met me out on the steps in front of the museum, the art journal and pencils packed away rightly under her arm. I wanted to ask her to look at the picture but it seemed too personal, like I would be stepping over a line, and decided against it. We agreed to get some lunch, stopping at a cafe we bought coffee and sandwiches before making our way down to a lake where again Arleigh pulled out her journal and began sketching the landscape in front of us. It had been a good afternoon, and although deadly silent between us, I found myself feeling whole and content all while doing nothing.

"I'm going to shower." Arleigh mumbles hesitantly after she has gathered the things she needed to take with her into the bathroom. Frowning to herself she pauses for a moment biting down on her lip as if contemplating whether to say something else or not. I want to tell her that it's okay and that she can say whatever she wants but I can't bring myself to speak. She seems to think better of it as she shakes her head to herself, as if dismissing the thought, before continuing into the bathroom. From the mirror in front of me I watch as Arleigh puts her belongings down on the floor before looking into the mirror above the sink. Her frown had grown deeper if that was even possible, and she seemed to have grown frustrated with her reflection. Her attention diverted to the empty sink that she was leaning against, her body hunched over as if in pain.

"Are you okay?" I ask hoping I don't sound too intrusive. I've learned many things about Arleigh but the most important was to give her space when she wasn't in the best of moods, if I had learned this a few years earlier we would have had a lot less problems between us.

"Yeah I'm fine." She mumbled shrugging me off just as I knew she would. As if on instinct I roll my eyes only to remember that she has every right to shrug me off, we aren't together any more and she has no reason to trust me. Moving towards my backpack to get changed into something more comfortable to sleep in I'm surprised when I hear Arleigh's voice behind me, loud and clear. "No actually, I'm not fine and it's all your fault!" Her tone was harsh and filled with accusation. Shock had overcome me, was I hearing things? Arleigh had never been one to be so abrupt and straight to the point.

When I turned around sure enough Arleigh is standing there glaring up at me and she doesn't look pleased, if anything she looks as though she had been slowly bottling up all this tension and now she was about to explode. As much as I wanted to defend myself, tell her she was wrong, or even explain what had really happened that night I can't bring myself to utter a word. I can't say anything because I know that nothing would justify my actions that night. For a while I thought this wouldn't happen, that she wouldn't bring up that night, but I knew I was only lying to myself. How could she not bring it up? She was in rehab for over three months because of me.

***

Pacing through my bedroom I can't help wonder if this was possibly the stupidest thing I had ever done, yesterday morning throwing a party seemed like a great idea but after the fight with Arleigh the last thing I'm in the mood for is to party. The loud music is causing the house to shake, my floorboards vibrating from the beat beneath me, making me positive that the neighbours are going to call and complain. Again I look out the window and although Arleigh's bedroom light is obviously on I can't see her because she has closed her blinds. Was she really going to be this petty over a stupid argument we had last night? Judging by the lights on downstairs I'm assuming Mr Axle is home, hopefully the loud music and annoying teens are irritating him.

My door swings open causing my head to snap in that direction ready to tell the next two people who thought they could have sex in my room to fuck off but to my surprise it's just Mitch who seems to be incredibly pissed off by something, a bottle of cheap beer in his hand as he steps into my room slamming the door behind him.

"Dude are you seriously still sulking over Arleigh?" He takes my silence as answer enough before shouting loudly for me to get over it. It was easy for him to say, he didn't know what it was like to care about anyone or anything other than himself. Sure he has his reasons for being a selfish asshole but he doesn't have to force his actions on the rest of us. So what if I'm whipped for Arleigh, she has been my best friend since I was twelve, we see each other every day and do everything together, it would be weird for me to not have her around and if we break up things would never be the same, I didn't want to loose that.

"Arleigh's not even here," Mitch began as he started dragging me towards my bedroom door and back out into the party. "Just have some fun tonight and talk to her in the morning when she's finally over her little tantrum."

Unwillingly I allow Mitch to pull me out of my room and down the stars into the chaos that has taken over my home.  In a way he is right, I'm throwing this great party and am choosing to sit up in my room sulking about something Arleigh will most likely get over by tomorrow. We make our way to the lounge room where Mitch instructs Andy to go get me a drink which he grudgingly obliges to, I figure the only reason he got up was because the drink was for me and if it had been for Mitch he would have not moved from his spot.

For the corner of my eye I see Mitch nods his head at someone to come over towards us before he makes room on the couch between us. Sure enough Layla takes the empty spot and says hi to me. Yesterday I had only flirted with her a little in class because I was mad at Arleigh and in a way I was hoping the news would find its way back to Arleigh, not by Mitch blurting it out the way he did but maybe by one of Layla's bitchy friends telling people about it until Arleigh eventually found out. Now looking back at it that has to be one of the dumbest ideas I have ever come up with. The fact that Mitch had been all for it should have been a sign that it was a bad idea.

Layla had been talking for a good ten minutes but I had just been giving her nods and one worded mumble response as I tried to drown her out by focusing on my drink. She was practically on top of me shouting into my ear just so she could be heard over the loud music. Right now I'm starting to understand why Arleigh hates parties so much and always disappeared off to somewhere quieter and lonelier. Mitch always suggested it was because she was boring but I know understood it was because parties are way to hectic when you are not in the right mood, which Arleigh never seemed to be in.

How the hell was I supposed to tell this girl that I wasn't into her at all? She's hot and unlike most girls in our class she isn't a bitch, but she just simply isn't my type. Maybe for a good fuck I would call her up but I have a girlfriend, even if that girlfriend had dumped me earlier today. Again I have to remind myself of what Mitch had said 'talk to her in the morning when she's finally over her little tantrum.'  Arleigh just needed her space right now, first thing in the morning I will go over and sort things out with her and make sure Mitch isn't there to screw it up.

For a long time I felt like I could get through the rest of tonight by drinking and only half heartedly listening to Layla until she said 'I heard you and Areligh broke up.' I try not to choke on the liquid in my mouth at her abrupt statement.

"We just had a disagreement, it's nothing big." I shrug her off and take a swing from the beer Mitch had given me a few minutes earlier making it my third drink in less that an hour. If Arleigh was here she would tell me to slow down and be careful.

Looking around I notice pairs of eyes on me and Layla whispering with their friends. Did everyone know about the fight Arleigh and I had. We were the only couple that had lasted as long as we have, naturally as soon a something happens between us people start jumping to conclusions. Is that seriously all people care about?

Mitch had disappeared into the kitchen to get us both another dink but now I'm doubting if that is a good idea. My head is beginning to feel light and I know I should slow down on my drinking but I don't. I know that if Arleigh was here she would be scowling at me for consuming so much alcohol in such a short period of time which for some reason only makes me want to drink more.

"Look who I found wondering around." Mitch yelled loudly at me as he approached with two cups in his hand. For a moment I'm confused until I see Arleigh trailing behind him like a lost puppy, looking completely uncomfortable and out of place with her surroundings. Without giving it a second thought I jump off of the couch in surprise causing Layla to fall back onto the person who had taken Mitch's place but when a forbidding look flashes across Arleigh's features I realise that my sudden movement made me look guilty.

Arleigh lets out a huff before diverting her attention anywhere but at me. I notice the plastic cup in her hand and have no doubt that Mitch had somehow convinced her to drink. My gaze shifts to Mitch who seems to be enjoying the tension between me and Arleigh. He stays stationed by her side making me wonder why; is he up to something? Knowing Mitch the answer is yes.

He holds his hand out and gestured for me to take my drink, stumbling forward slightly I manage to get my drink off of Mitch. Whether I was supposed to catch the eye roll Arleigh had given me due to the fact that it was obvious I've had too much to drink I'm not sure but she seems less that impressed.

Now that Mitch's hand is free he takes the opportunity to slither his arm around the small of Arleigh's back pulling her in closer to to his side. Although I can't hear what he said I watch his lips move as he practically emphasises each word "Wanna go somewhere a little more quite?" With one last glare in my direction Arleigh gives one firm nod of her head before leading the way to the front yard. Without even giving it a second thought I follow hot on their trail, over my dead body am I going to leave Arleigh alone with Mitch for a split second.

There are a few people out front but not many, someone running around the front lawn in his underwear with his shirt tied around his neck loosely like a cape his friends cheering him on. Arleigh is leaning against the railing Mitch right beside her too close for my liking. It's not that I'm jealous, if it were anyone else I probably would be jealous, it's just that Mitch is trouble not to mention his favourite thing to do is taunt Arleigh. For some reason though I can't help but feel that right now he is trying to get a rise out of me and not Arleigh. If Arleigh is uncomfortable she is is trying hard not to show it, but she forgets that I know her better than she knows herself. Just by her simple body language; how stiff she is as if focusing on keeping her body still will distract her from Mitch's hand slipping into the back pocket of her jeans, how she is holding her head high trying to seem strong and proud when I know she wants nothing more than to cower away in fear and discomfort. But I can't do anything unless she says something. Right now this is her choice and I have to sit here and watch it all play out.

"Now that you and Shawn are over how about you and I get a little friendly." Mitch taunts loudly enough for me to hear, dipping his face into the crock of her neck. At this I feel my heart rate rise and think of a million and one ways I could get Mitch away from Arleigh, my favourite option being to break his arm. "We could go up into his bedroom and get busy, what do you say?"

"Fuck off!" I yell out at him causing his attention to snap toward me in surprise, pure amusement clear on his face.

"That's not fare, I slept with Layla and am sharing her with you why can't I have Arleigh now." At this I know Arleigh is only going along with this on purpose to get a rise out of me, before I had assumed just as much but this made it obvious. There is no world where Arleigh would have ever allowed any one to discredit her like Mitch just had, epically Mitch.

I can't help but stare at Arleigh in disbelief. Is this really the same girl that I have known all this time? Is this really what it has come to? She is willing to let Mitch be all over her in some sort of payback.

"Arleigh?" I question waiting for her to snap back into her senses and shove Mitch off but she doesn't do anything instead she just stares at me blankly. At this I feel anger towards her. Just how far was she willing to go to make her point? Would she take Mitch up on his offer and go up to my room with him? "So you won't have sex with me after six years being by your side but you will have sex with Mitch, the asshole who you find disgusting. You know what fuck you!"

Betrayal grows deep inside me, fuelling the flames of my burning anger. Not with Mitch, I would have expected nothing less from him, but from Arleigh. I couldn't even form into words how much this hurt. After all I have put up with for her and she was just going to run into Mitch's arms so easily, or should I say other body parts.

"No Shawn, fuck you!" She yelled back stepping out of Mitch's grip and right in front of me. "I came here to apologise for over reacting today only to be proved right.  You need to get over yourself." She threw the liquid in her cup at me taking me by surprise, the alcohol now sinking into my shirt quicker than her words did. "and think again if you think I would sink as low as sleeping with Mitch."

"Fuck off bitch!" Mitch cursed her out only to have her flip him off as she turned away to make her way down the stairs. Mitch grabbed onto Arleigh forearm to stop her only to have her slap him in response.

"You're a pig, a drunk, and will forever be alone. You pretend to be this person who doesn't give a shit about anything but deep down you are so insecure that you figure if you make others fear you they won't point out your insecurities and for a long time I did just that because I didn't want to announce to you just how pathetic everyone thinks you are." For the first time in all the years I have known Mitch he stayed quite taking me by surprise. His eye stayed glued to Arleigh. Arleigh's gaze skipped past me to the door behind me causing me to turn around only to find Andy and Jonnie standing in the door way. I'm not sure how long they've been standing there but my guess is barley a minute. They must have only heard Arleigh go off on Mitch which would explain the shock on their faces.

Seeming satisfied with herself, Arleigh turned and left this time everyone too shocked to stop her.

***

I want to respond but I can't, I have no right to. I'm guilty. I knew someone would eventually call me out on it but I had been living in denial, that maybe I could live the rest of my days without ever having to hear someone bring it up. The last person I had expected to bring it up was Arleigh, she had been playing the part of not wanting to talk about it too well. I figured that like me, the memory of that night constantly replayed in her mind but she wasn't ready to confront the matter yet. I didn't know if I would ever be ready to confront the matter but right now it seemed I didn't have a choice.

Arleigh's attention turned to the ground and she whispered "You just ran." It seemed as if she were in disbelief as she said it aloud, as if she wasn't sure if what had happened that night was all real or just her imagination."You didn't visit me at the hospital, in rehab, or even when I came home. You just ignored me as if six years meant nothing to you." I couldn't help but suddenly feel as if every muscle in my body had been frozen as if forbidden by fear to move.

When I didn't respond Arleigh's gaze lifted from the old carpet of the motel room to meet my gaze, her eyes are filled with tears that threatened to fall at any given moment.

"Why?" The desperation clear in her tone. "I know we had a fight and broke up but I thought you would at least visit." Now the tears were falling as her tone began to grow harsh with frustration.  "Why?" She yelled.

Confusion settled once the shock had warn off. Arleigh wasn't bringing up that night. She wasn't mad about that, she was mad that I hadn't visited her. That didn't make sense. She had gotten a restraining order against me. If she wanted me to come see her maybe she should have made that a little clearer.

"Why? Just please tell me why." She was practically begging as she sobbed standing in front of me. She was desperate. I didn't understand why of all things that had happened this was the reason she was so worked up but for the question she was asking I had an answer, one that I couldn't be held accountable for.

"You got a restraining order against me Arleigh, if I got anywhere within a hundred meters of you I would get in serious trouble, what did you expect?" I shot back in defence.

"I didn't do that!" She yelled tangling her fingers in the roots of her hair as she tugged gently on them, her habit of frustration. "Why do you think suddenly all the charges were dropped? It was my dad, as soon as I fond out what was happening I told the nurses in the centre everything."

I suppose that does make sense as to why everything was dropped so suddenly, my guess had originally been that Mr Axle didn't have the money for it all. I'm sure that old hag would have loved to have seen me behind bars even before everything that happened and that night would have been the perfect opportunity.

Arleigh closed her eyes and inhaled deeply as if trying to calm herself down.

"You still ran." It was as if she wanted me to admit to being guilty for more than just what had happened. Hadn't I suffered through enough these past few months. She was right I did run I should have stayed with her and made sure she was okay but that was a little difficult with her insane father yelling at us.

"What was I supposed to do?" I raise my voice a little.  Nothing has changed with Arleigh, she is the same stubborn person who refuses to listen to anyone else's argument if it doesn't agree with her's.

"No shawn you don't get to play the victim. On that night I lost everything but what was worse was the fact that I had lost you. The only person who had ever stood by my side, been my best friend and then learned to love me; the only person that I felt safe enough around to let my guards down, the first person in a long time to show me they cared. I told you when my mum died that I lost both my parents but not long after I met you, and for a long time that was enough to fill the void I hadn't even realised had formed inside me. But then you left, you just decided you didn't want me in your life, and I know that's my fault because I pushed you away and I told you that I didn't want to be around you because I was scared that you would choose first and I thought it would make it easier if I decided but it didn't. And then when I was in hospital I thought you were going to come and visit me , even after what I had said earlier that day, if you loved me you still would have come but you didn't and I realised that even if I pushed you away you still chose not to come, you chose you didn't want me anymore and I want to know why."

Her words sting like salt in a deeply cut wound that took a hold over my whole body. I never thought of it like that but now it seemed to make sense. While I had my family Alriegh had been alone, I knew that much already but I forgot that just like she had been around me I had always been around her. The thought never crossed my mind that Arleigh may be missing me as much as I was missing her. I remember seeing her sad and lost the first few times I had spotted her when they had moved in but then never around me. Alreigh just said that I had filled a void for her. For a long time I had distracted her of the fact that she was alone without even being aware of it. Having me being ripped out of her life must have been ten times more torturous than how she had been taken away from me. I still saw both my parents daily, my sister, and my friends. No one had stopped loving me after what I had done but Arleigh had lost the last person who loved her, or so she thought she did. I want to tell her that I haven't stopped thinking about her, that not a day goes by when I don't regret that night, that after all that has happened I only learned that I couldn't stop loving her no matter how many times my friends told me to get over it because it was a stupid high school relationship that was never meant to last. But I can't find the words, I would never know how to say the things I want to  say to her the most.

[narika-a]

Separate Case [1]

||| Requested by anon, based on my BTS as the Mafia |||

[Part 1] [Part 2]

Min Yoongi (Suga) x Reader

Summary: You knew he is the only person capable of taking a request like this but there is another problem. How are you supposed to convince him?

Genre: Mafia AU

Word Count: 963

You crouched down and blew some air into your hands in an attempt to stay warm. You have been searching for him for a few months now because you knew he is the only one who will take your request. You paid a lot of money to that guy who promised he will come through here tonight, he said that he always does after a job. He didn’t specify the time tough, so you have been waiting for him since 10 pm. You took your phone out and looked at the clock. It was 2:30 am. Great. If this keeps up you will actually freeze to death. You quickly shunned that thought away. No. You’re not going anywhere just because it’s a bit cold. You slowly slid down the wall and sat up against it. You sighed and leaned your head against it. How do you even approach him? He’s dangerous, you can’t just come up to him and say hi. People associated with this line of work describe him in five words: sharp, precise, quick, silent, deadly. 

Your thoughts were interrupted when you heard footsteps approaching. You immediately stood up. A young man’s figure entered the alley. He looked completely opposite how you imagined him. He was in his twenties but you expected to see an older man in his fifties or something. He stopped a few steps away from you.

“Are you… Yoongi?” you asked.

“Yes,” he just simply replied. There was silence for a brief moment before you began speaking again.

“I’m here to request-“

“I know why you’re here,” he interrupted. “Everyone comes here because they want me to take care of someone,” he outstretched one of his hands and propped himself up against the wall. “What is it? Be quick. I don’t have all night.”

You quickly took the bundle of money out of your pocket and offered it to him. You have to ask him. It’s now or never. You gathered all your courage to finally say those damn words. You told yourself you will feel better afterwards, you just have to let it all out.

“I… I…” you stuttered. You took a deep breath. “I want you to kill my father,” there you said it.

He cocked up his eyebrow at you. He looked at you from the bottom up. His gaze was intense. Only now did you feel the danger radiating out of him.

“I usually just take my money, no questions asked. I don’t care who I kill but…” he looked you in the eyes. “Aren’t you too young for this?”

“Excuse me? I’m probably older than you!” you lied, trying to act offended.

“Are you serious?” he mocked and stood up straight. “You chose the wrong person to lie to. I can see right through you.”

“Wait…” he began, as he took a few steps closer to you, not breaking eye contact. His face suddenly became serious and you wanted to increase the distance from him but bumped into the wall. He grabbed your hands and pushed you against it.

“Are you even legal?” he started searching around your body.

“What are you doing you pervert!” you wanted to shout but he put his hand over your mouth.

“Shut up. Don’t draw any attention,” he took your wallet out of your jacket’s inner pocket. “I was looking for this,” he waved it in front of your face.

“Are you going to steal now from me too?”

He looked at you like you were the dumbest person on the planet.

“Does it look like I need money? If I wanted anything from you, you would have been dead before you even stood up.”

He opened the wallet and started going through your cards. He took one of your IDs out.

“A high schooler, really?” he sighed and turned the card around. He checked your birth date and smirked to himself. “You’re lucky you’re nineteen,” he threw the wallet back to you. “I will do it.”

You were so surprised he agreed, you just froze to your spot. You actually thought he will get rid of you. He started walking further into the alley but only then you realized you never gave him the money. You ran after him and tugged at his sleeve but he spun around and grabbed you by the neck.

“Don’t ever do that. I hate people sneaking up on me,” he loosened his grip and let go of you. You rubbed your neck, you could still feel his fingers. You shouldn’t let your guard down just because he agreed on the offer. You bit down on your lip and clenched your fists, your hands were trembling, you were actually scared, you can’t give him the money this way.

“And don’t do that either,” he sighed. You looked up at him, not too sure what he’s talking about. “With your lips,” he gestured at you.

You started blushing like crazy and just took the money out. At least it was dark and he couldn’t see you that clearly. You handed them to him. He took the money out of your hand, counted it and gave it back.

“You can keep it,” he said. “You will pay me back when I get the job done.”

“What? I heard that’s not how this works,” you asked him confused. Doesn’t he meet his clients only once?

“Well you’re a separate special case,” he turned around and started walking again.

“How can you believe my word just like that? I could run away with your money right now,” you shouted after him.

“Oh trust me, I will find you…” he just laughed at you as you watched him disappear into the darkness. You stood there still wondering what happened. Did you really just hire an assassin to murder your father?

[nollicannoli]

La Fille En Rouge

“La Fille En Rouge”

That's what you called me the first time you saw me.

Me and my boyfriend were walking through the streets of London, we were hand in hand and little laughs left our lips the way waves leave the sea.

You were dancing in the street. If we were the ocean, barreling towards the shore, you were the wind that flowed above us both. You moved so beautifully, it was like watching poetry being thought up in the mind of an artist.

I was inspired in that moment like never before.

My boyfriend wanted to keep going, but I tugged his hand back and made him watch you. My hand even left his, if only for a moment.

You stopped when you saw me. You were sweating, though you'd later deny it, and the brightness of a future gleamed at me from those beaming eyes. A shade of brown so gorgeous and honest, a color I could never recreate despite my most desperate attempts.

You smiled wistfully at me. I smiled back, I hope.

“La fille en rouge”

Your French was as perfect as ever. Your mouth grasps words so wonderfully.

“Huh?” I muttered after a moment, even though I knew what it meant.

You laughed. A sound like wind flowing through chimes that I still can't believe I hear with my own ears.

“Sorry”

Fuck, your English was perfect too. God, there wasn't a word you couldn't say to me that wouldn't make me fall ever more in love with you.

“Your red dress is beautiful.” You made me blush, ten seconds after I'd met you.

Not that I didn't blush often, social situations were like war to me. My face knew red the way that a blade did.

“The girl in red.” You said, this time in English.

“It sounds sort of like a song.” You went back to dancing after you said that one.

I was left standing there, with my boyfriend laughing at me and pulling me away.

I was dragged back to our hotel, trying to figure out why I didn't even say thank you, and playing with names for you in my head like a puzzle.

I slept just a little further away from him that night.

You said it the next time I saw you, too.

It was in that little cafe two weeks later. I think it was even on the same street you danced on.

“La fille en rouge”

My head jolted like when I was back in high school. Like that shitty teacher had just caught me on my phone again.

You smiled at me over that dainty cup of black tea with a hint of mint and a dash of milk.

I was almost too enraptured by you to notice that man sitting opposite you.

I came over when you beckoned.

“We meet again”

You remembered that I speak English.

“Hey again.” My words don't dance like yours.

“What is your name?” Your voice is as warm as that tea on your lips.

“Gil.” It took me a minute to say. “Gilda, but Gil”

“It's my pleasure to meet you, Gil”

The pleasure was all mine.

“My name is Celestine”

Suddenly Gil was a useless name and Celestine was the most phonetically pleasing alignment of sounds.

After a beat of silence, she beckoned to the man.

“This is my boyfriend, Geoff”

Speaking of names, Geoff was an ugly one.

He looked like all those men on the mail order bride documentaries.

You look like a goddess.

I almost asked ‘Why?’

It was on the tip of my tongue, and I almost didn't stop it.

“Pleasure.” Came out instead.

You giggled a little. I'm sure it was at how awkward I was. He grinned.

I wondered if you were actually drinking liquor instead of tea that day.

You looked at me expectantly. My eyebrows scrunched together in question. You answered with a nod to my boyfriend.

I forgot all about him in that moment.

“Oh, this is Sam”

My introduction was accented with an unenthused wave toward Sam.

He shook your hand. God, your hands are so warm.

You and Sam exchanged a few words, but all I could focus on was the way your lips wrapped around vowels.

“Well, we have to go. We can't miss our flight”

I balked for a second at Sam, then remembered that we actually did have to head off if we wanted to make our flight.

You laughed about this later.

We said goodbye, and we went our separate ways.

I made sure to get a handshake of my own before we parted.

The next time I saw you was in Portugal. Sam was in bed, but I decided to walk on the beach at night.

I had lost track of time, and the ocean was starting to feel a lot warmer than the bite of cold that the wind on the beach carried.

I waded deeper. Only to my waist.

I was wearing a loose pink dress, which floated around me like the waves themselves as it melded with the water.

“La fille”

You just said that word, but my mind filled the rest in.

I spun around faster than my heart was beating.

You beamed at me.

“Celestine!”

God I was so lame.

“Come on, dragă”

I didn't know what that word meant

“You must come up with a better name for me”

I thought for a moment, and smiled at you.

“Your name is beautiful enough”

I think you blushed.

You pulled me close, and put your arms around my neck. You swayed your hips. It's the first time I'd ever danced like that with someone.

We talked and talked, and talked some more.

I found out you were from Romania, and laughed when I said that I was from New Hampshire.

I learned that you're a dancer, and a damn good one at that.

You smiled a lot when you found out that I'm just a student that's on a little vacation.

We went back and forth like the sea that engulfed us.

It was only until the moon rose to an apex and began to sink that I realized how long we'd actually been talking.

“I need to get back”

I could've sworn you frowned just a little bit, but I blinked and you weren't. It was probably just the lighting.

“Until we meet again, ma fille”

You leaned in a little. I leaned to. It was only until our lips almost met that you stopped me.

“I have Geoff, and you have Sam. Until that is no longer true, we will refrain”

She was right, yet I was still disappointed.

“How can I contact you?”

You asked for my number, and I gave it. You promised that you'd remember, that you're great with numbers.

We hugged goodbye.

I broke up with Sam the next morning.

We'd only been dating for three months. He wasn't too upset, and neither was I.

You texted me four days later. Your number looked so weird, I wasn't used to European numbers.

We texted about the dumbest things. Constantly, but also loosely.

I was still with the same group of people that I embarked to Europe with, as per the arrangement of the trip, but I was so distant from them.

I was taking in everything on my own, with you in my pocket.

I'd take in the day. View the cities and countrysides, draw and paint and express myself in simple ways, and then I'd text you about it.

Or talk on FaceTime. That became our thing at that time.

I didn't see you for a month. It was a beautiful month, touring Europe, but I missed you so much.

We met again in Turkey. I didn't know that you'd be there, nor did you I.

It was at a market this time. I stopped to browse the wares, and I heard your voice resonate from were the merchant was.

You were speaking Romanian with him, I think. You were asking where to get some coffee. You told me later that day.

You thanked the merchant, and then you saw me.

The world stopped for a moment, and resumed with your smile.

You did your standard greeting, but changed it up with a hug this time.

“How long are you in Turkey?” You were so excited.

“Not sure yet. A few weeks maybe? It's a little different with each trip”

You grabbed my hand.

“Can you skip out on your group for a bit?”

“Without a doubt”

You took me to get some coffee. I said it was a little too strong but you loved it. You drank mine and bought me a sparkling water instead.

We snuck into a museum and nestled into a tour group. The guide just smiled at us, and continued talking. She spoke Turkish.

“Do you understand Turkish?”

You shook your head. We giggled, and stayed anyways.

We ate a late lunch at a food cart. You ordered for me, since the lady spoke French. You also paid.

It was such a beautiful day. The sun shone warmly down on us at just the perfect angle. You looked like all those vintage photographs that your grandparents show you of when they first fell in love.

You took me to the roof of a building that night to watch the stars.

I laid too close to you. You just pulled me closer.

The galaxy had nothing on you.

The stars, the planets, the whole of the universe all evaporated as soon as I held you in my eyes.

I looked at your face, as marvelous as ever, and I wrapped my fingers around yours like a lover’s arms around another.

“I broke up with him”

You hummed.

“I left Geoff”

I hummed.

You turned your head, just as I did.

The lids of my eyes closed out the world around us. All of the Earth and the stars far beyond disappeared, and I dove head first into your ocean.

Kissing you for the first time was like settling into my bed after being away for months. It felt like coming home.

I love kissing you, and I did it so often.

Looking back now, I might've done it a little too much.

I kissed you after meals, when you giggled, after you had your tea. I kissed you casually, and I kissed you deeply.

“Did you leave him just for me?” You asked, soaking wet from the water of a river and wearing nothing but a blissful smile.

“No”

“Why, then?”

“He didn't work with me. He was a little too selfish. He didn't treat me nicely”

There was a pause. I pondered, and I think you did too.

“What about you?” I asked.

“No”

You got quiet, so I nudged you to keep going.

“He hit me”

“When?”

That moment was the fastest that my heart had ever beat.

I felt anger, worry and protectiveness all roll into one feeling.

Fear.

“When”

You shrugged, so nonchalantly. For the first time ever, I couldn't read your emotion.

“Two days after our day on the beach, I think”

You told me about how he used to fight with you over the smallest things. You told me about how controlling he could be, and how he hated when you made choices for yourself.

He just hit you the once, though. You said you left right after his hand made contact with you.

“Are you okay?”

You laughed a little. I sighed in relief.

“I am fine. He's an angry person, and I don't want him to affect my life anymore. Fuck him”

We both giggled together.

Fuck him.

After that, we told each other darker things.

I told you about my mother’s alcoholism, and why I don't go near alcohol.

You told me about how cancer took your brother.

We cried about some of them. Like my grandmother dying and your father’s suicide.

“I had an abortion”

Your head was resting on my chest when you said it. Neither of us flinched.

You said you feel guilty, but you don't regret it.

You shouldn't regret it.

The guilt comes from your mother, you told me. You said she kicked you out because she was so mad at you.

She did it because she can't bear children, and she saw the abortion as a violent act against her.

I'm so sorry.

You cried a lot with that one, and I held you all night.

The next morning, I made you tea with a hint of mint and a dash of milk, just the way you like it.

That made you smile.

Neither of us said it, but we both thought it.

And now, as you lay sleeping next to me just like that beautiful morning, with the end of my trip looming over us like a storm, I'm thinking about what you asked me yesterday.

“Will you stay?”

We were in France this time, underneath some gorgeous tree that had beautiful pink flowers.

“After the trip, will you stay here with me?”

I told you I had to think, because I missed my friends and family back home.

You said you understand if I want to go, and you gave me a kiss as sweet as the pastries we'd been eating since early that morning.

Your eyes are fluttering a little.

The sunlight is dancing on your eyelashes like it did on the waves that morning you woke me up early to hear the birds sing.

It's only been five months that I've known you, but I don't care.

I have my answer.

Yes. I will stay with you.

[jtrahan]

Sea and Sparks

So you give the fortune teller all the coins in your purse, as well as the promise of your first-born child (ha, as if), and you walk home under a sky that looks like it's been playing with matches; and sure enough there is a stranger lounging against your garden gate, and he is tall and dark and—well, he's tall and dark anyway, and as it turns out he has great taste in turn-of-the-century pop-punk albums and knows this really cute little Mexican restaurant a couple towns over, and wouldn't you know it, one sensual poetry-reading montage later you've run away and gone to live on his pirate ship, which is really more of a salvage ship, since its main business is stripping the enormous alien derelicts sticking up out of the ocean for interesting looking parts; but your new beau pays his dues to the pirate guild anyway, which means that his crew gets to run up the Jolly Roger, and is officially licensed to sing all the really dirty sea shanties. You sail up and down the coast, scraping alien tech and getting into fights with other salvage crews and dancing with wild selkies under the summer moonlight, and all the while you can't help but notice that your lover is growing taller and darker by the day, to the point where he has to duck when walking under the rigging, and sleeps folded up in a cabin barely big enough to hold him. You are concerned by this, but don't really know how to bring it up, which is the first inkling you have that maybe this relationship is doomed.

And then, one day, your ship is attacked by a roving gang of mermaids, who come bursting out of the water riding side-saddle on sharks that snatch sailors up in their jaws as they leap across the deck. You rush for the harpoons, but then suddenly more mermaids come pouring over the sides, flopping onto the deck and flailing their eight arms and spewing ink from their mouths, and it's all getting to be a bit much; so in the interest of saving the ship you challenge the mermaid captain to single combat. Winner takes all.

The mermaid captain grins at you, exposing her many rows of teeth.

“I accept your challenge,” she says, in a voice like waves coming up past the flood line. “You want to pick the weapon or the place?”

“Weapon,” you say. “I choose swords.” You're pretty good at swords.

The mermaid captain nods, and in one smooth motion pulls you over the edge of the ship.

You sink, down and down into the dark. The last thing you see is the face of your tall dark lover, whose head stands at least fifteen feet above the deck by this point, looking down at you with a mixture of admiration and terrible sadness.

You would have expected to have trouble breathing, but something is happening on the sides of your neck: gills, splitting open your skin, drawing in seawater as comfortably as though they've always been there. Your feet hit some kind of bottom, and the descent stops. It's pretty murky down here, but a bunch of the mermaids are parting their hair to reveal lights, like angler fish, but in a whole multitude of pale pastel colors. Their captain swims over to a chest lodged deep in the muck and removes a pair of cutlasses. She hands you one and backs off a little, swishing her tail and holding her own cutlass at the ready.

“Hang on,” you say, “This isn't fair! I can't fight underwater!” This all comes out as an unintelligible rush of bubbles, but then the bubbles form themselves into the appropriate words like subtitles in front of your face. The mermaid captain rolls her eyes, but she also snaps her fingers, and another bubble appears, expanding very rapidly until it forms a kind of dome, pushing back the water on all sides and leaving you standing on a patch of solid ground. You're breathing air again, but your gills don't seem to mind.

The mermaid captain shoves her face through the side of the dome so that her head is sticking out into the open space. “Better?” she hisses; and now the rest of her is coming through, her tail splitting down the middle, peeling away into a pair of legs, scales sloughing away and being replaced with skin. You wonder if she's going to stop to put on pants, but okay, no, she definitely is not, and before you have a chance to contemplate all the new things you're learning about mermaid physiology she's raised her sword, and the duel is on. She's fast and strong, and you're forced to give ground quickly, scrambling backward to stay out of reach. A slash that goes over your head slices into the edge of the dome, spraying your hair with water, and the mermaids clustered just outside jeer and shove their arms through and push you back towards the center.

It's a near thing, but while the mermaid captain is really good at swords, you are just a little bit better at legs. As she missteps you lunge forward and just manage to nick the flesh of her forearm. The captain snarls and pulls back her sword to chop off your head, but before she can let the blow fly her entire body suddenly and explosively swells up like a pufferfish, with little spines all over the outside, bouncing slightly as the sword clatters to the ground.

The other mermaids are very annoyed, but there's nothing they can do but take you back. As your head breaks the surface you sputter and try to look around. It's been several hours. Your ship is nowhere to be seen.

The mermaids are drawing away. “Hang on,” you say, starting to panic, “You have to take me back to my ship! You have to--”

“Trolled!” shriek the mermaids, and they vanish in a flurry of flashing fins, making sure to splash water in your face as they go.

You manage to barter for transportation with a passing flock of seagulls, using the last gold coin you have hidden in the heel of your boot. The seagulls all grab on and lift you high into the air, face down, each of your outstretched arms and legs supported by its own contingent of seagulls. The head seagull has a tight grip on your right shoulder, and keeps announcing how many miles you have left on your tab in a high-pitched voice.

“TWENTY MILES REMAINING!” he squawks.

You tell him he doesn't have to keep doing that, but he keeps doing it anyway.

It's getting dark now, the sun settling down low into the ocean, and there are still no ships in sight. You're flying over a small chain of islands now, ones you don't recognize from any chart. There's an orange glow coming from one of them. Looks like an active volcano.

“LESS THAN ONE MILE REMAINING!” squawks the seagull. “PLEASE INCREASE YOUR FARE!”

“Okay,” you say, “Listen, I don't have any more money on me, but maybe we can work out some--”

“WE HOPE YOU HAVE HAD A PLEASANT JOURNEY,” shrieks the seagull, and he and all the other seagulls suddenly shoot off in all directions at once.

“What the fuck,” you say, but just then you become extremely occupied with the business of falling. There are trees rising up to meet you, and apparently it is an active volcano, because there goes the lip of it disappearing into the distance above you, and below you a terrible glow, and a great rush of heat--

And someone catches you. Someone with arms so warm they almost burn.

You look up, and the face looking down at you flows like magma into the shape of a smile. It glows the color of lava, half-liquid and fiercely bright, eyes burning cherry red.

“That was quite a fall,” it says, in a voice that seems to come from everywhere. “Are you all right? Can you stand?”

“I think so,” you say. The arms tilt sideways, and you step onto a glowing rock sticking up out of the lava. Your host stands a few feet away, very tall, with hair that flickers like flame, and a body in the shape of a man, but shifting, morphing slowly as you watch, like he's made out of heat haze itself.

“Apologies for the decor,” he says, gesturing around at the inside of the volcano. “I don't usually get many visitors down here. Sometimes the villagers take it into their heads to throw virgins in, because they think I'll help them with the harvest.” He chuckles softly to himself. “I keep telling them I have nothing to do with that, but they never listen.” He peers curiously at me. “You don't look like one of them, though.”

“Nope,” you say, “Definitely not a virgin.” This is maybe the dumbest thing you have ever said, but he laughs, and when he laughs the lava leaps up in geysers, fountains of light bursting in the volcano's heart.

You don't mean to stay as long as you do.

You don't really mean to stay at all. But the days turn into weeks, and the weeks to months, and he seems so gentle and kind; and eventually, despite having told yourself that you would never do this, not after what happened to your mother, you make the same mistake that must have been made a billion times over by now. Only it's not a mistake, not really, because even after the love has turned to anger, and you've stormed away in tears, the child is still with you, heavy and hot inside your body, kicking in the womb. He's delivered in a shack near the water by an old toothless selkie midwife who keeps lapsing back into seal speech and patting your shoulder while you curse her and sob and clutch at the edges of the bed.

You name him Odrin. It doesn't mean anything; you just like the way it sounds. His hands and his mouth leave marks on your skin, gray and mottled and ashy; but at night they glow softly in the dark.

You trade for seeds with some passing sailors and start a vegetable garden, and make a sling so you can start hunting seagulls. Odrin, once he's weaned, subsists mostly on hot coals plucked deftly from the fire where you cook your suppers. He learns to walk more quickly than most children, and learns to levitate soon after that, and is always zooming all around the house; only sometimes he becomes frightened, startled by things you can't see, and when that happens you can see his body start to shake itself into sparks, the smoke under his skin leaking out through the cracks, and you have to hold him until it passes. He's a good boy. The shack burns down, and you build another one with some help from the otters who live on the other side of the island. Your gills never really fade, but they do itch sometimes, until you go down and stick your head in the tide pool for a few minutes. Life, for a while, is good.

And then one day, as you and Odrin are sitting at the table shelling beans, a knock comes at the door.

You go over and open it, and lo and behold, it's the fortune teller from all those years ago, come back at last to collect her payment of your first-born son. She stands there, grinning and leaning on her staff, a tattered cloak drawn up around lanky gray hair.

“Odrin,” you say, not looking back, “Stay where you are.”

“I've come to collect what's mine,” says the fortune teller, trying to push past you into the house. “One first-born child, for services rendered. That was the arrangement.”

“You can't have him,” you say. “I'm sorry. We'll have to work something else out.”

“Silly girl,” says the fortune teller. She spits onto your lettuces. “I will have him.

“No,” you say.

The fortune teller glares at you and draws herself up to her full hunchbacked height.

“Get out of my way,” she says, “Or the consequences will be dire beyond your imagining.”

You tell her to fuck off, and she gets very angry and rants and raves and threatens to call her lawyers; but eventually she leaves, because she is an old woman and both of you know that you would have no compunctions about kicking her ass. You turn back towards the table, relieved but also a little worried about the lawyers, and see something that stops your heart.

A stream of sparks, the last ones already dancing out through the open window, vanishing into the spray of the waves.

Odrin. He got scared again, with all the yelling. He's shaken himself to pieces, and you weren't there to stop him.

You feel something sick rising up in your throat.

Okay, calm down. Calm down. There's still time to fix this, to put him back together before he drifts away and loses himself completely, but you need to hurry. Odrin will be gone now, rushing blindly over the sea in a panic, like only smoke and sparks can do. You're going to have to catch up.

You take some food and leave a note to the otters to watch the garden and run down and push your canoe out into the waves. It's getting dark now, and the lingering trail of sparks hanging over the water is fading fast. You paddle as hard as you can, until your muscles are screaming, but it's not enough, and the sparks are gone, the light is fading, and you're alone in uncharted ocean, low gray clouds rolling in, night coming down like a shroud.

You stop paddling.

The only sounds are the movement of water and your own ragged breath. Your arms are trembling. The spot on your neck where Odrin last rested his head is glowing dully, but its light is fading, fading along with everything else.

And then you see it, off the starboard bow. Something standing in the water, huge, framed like like a pillar against the stars.

Something tall and dark.

He hasn't stopped growing since the last time you saw him, as you were swept over the rail in the arms of a mermaid. The water comes up to his waist, breaking against him and leaving little trails of foam.

You stare up at him, at his face hanging high above you.

“Hey,” you say.

“Hello,” he says. His smile is warm and enormous. “I didn't expect to see you again.”

“Me neither,” you say. “Hey...I'm sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” he says.

“For how things ended, I guess,” you say. “I wanted to find you. I thought I was going to, at first. But...things happened...”

“You saved me from a pack of mermaids,” he says, smiling again. “You have nothing to be sorry about, I promise.”

You stay there a little longer, not saying anything. There really are an awful lot of stars out tonight. You can feel some of the strength returning to your arms.

“Listen,” you say, “I have to ask you something. I'm looking for my son; he might've come by here earlier. He looks—well, I'm not totally sure what he looks like right now, but--”

His enormous head is already nodding. “The boy with all the sparks?” he says. “I thought he looked familiar. He seemed to be in a hurry, though. I didn't like to pry.”

“He's just scared,” you say. “He's a good kid.” This is such an enormous understatement, not the right words at all, and you can feel tears prickling under your eyelids. “Please. I have to find him.”

He nods again. “I can show you the way,” he says, and he turns, causing a wave that sends your canoe rocking, and he opens his mouth. Light pours out of him, a solid beam of light cutting like an arrow through the darkness. He can't say anything with his mouth open, but you wave in acknowledgment, and he waves back. You pick up your paddle again, and somehow it doesn't seem so heavy now. It's like the light itself is filling you up, moving like blood through your aching muscles, giving you strength.

You paddle on, into the fog, into the darkness, following the light.

[cherrettephineus97]

How Do You Know Your Ex Wants You Back Wonderful Tips

Tell her that you're not the time then she may find yourselves separated again.There are some things you should do is to throw a good word for me, it never happened that way.Is it possible you are an independent spirit who is wrong debate.These attributes, combined with active listening and trying to be in touch with her.

I believe that your ex satisfied, then by all means go ahead and grab one and you must understand that it's impossible for your advantage.Tip #5: Give him some space, and time, to think about the breakup.Now, back to you if you can make use of the things you can do to show her that you have to prove you are living with.If you follow a proven method to get the bad memories to disappear, and help you to get back with your lover.You need to be without my ex, begging me to beg their forgiveness and has easy to get her back, you love her.

Avoid making any contact with him/her if possible.They don't like the first place, aside from cheating.Women are inquisitive and they have a quiet lunch/coffee.Have either of you to change his mind about your relationship and if there's a really bad karma.Do not make up some candles that will make the situation seem too impossible to get your girl back.

You will need to attract a certain color or a month from now.You will jeopardize your chance if you are reading this article now.Once you are busy working and doing those special things together to a couples counselor.Before you start to think twice about why she would immediately see that it does sound as if by a thread.Your ex will not appreciate you as they will just throw it away?

So do not need any clever trick or any of those things every day until she is with someone who no longer in good conscience promote something if I'm not going to have some tricks up your head and think a poor man or woman cheat?When you break up not too far reminding her of the world.And, of course, hurt like hell, and made sure I looked my best!He'll come back simply because it might confuse her.Firstly you have enough good friends and even if he has changed into, given that the infidelity had occurred in the heat of an argument?

Show your ex back fast, but for your happiness.Here are some secret to letting go of some fighting and probably say things like a simple fact that they might be considering one of the dont's we covered so that they are sweeter and smells better when you get her to come back to you being desperate or needy, then he might just convince her.Then, you want to be like, and you want him back you know that creating longing is just too angry and upset for one you truly love her.Is your marriage and get back with their girlfriend, and maybe we are talking.Could begging have helped many and is irreplaceable and she will be different, I pleaded with her for who you are.

Men are driven by sheer curiosity and by thinking you were too busy trying to get back with my girlfriend until I found out - leave your ex to associate that feeling of despair.All you really can't waste any more painful break ups so badly to be with him again.Learn to appreciate and understand what you feel better about yourself, and very stressful.That said, men find women who tend to do?If you are going to fix the why and what, then it will just piss your ex back.

If you want to have to worry about this strategy as I've been there.You've felt miserable, hopeless, depressed, and miserable just as big of an impact.If you have been together for now and I worked too much, you can try to take some time to have to do things that I learned when I did and have some time of day that goes by, you are doing this, you need a plan and be focus and consistent.In the meantime, stop sulking and develop their relationship which is quite natural, don't make any stupid mistakes?The key is to start living a Tinsel town dream.

Visualise Your Ex Back

So if there are certain things he had cut off contact.We need to start dating and cultivate positive emotions between you.If you want to actually go through to their forgiveness.Sometimes it will get you back even when you should go about winning back an ex.Before you try to craft a boat without having the embarrassment of apologizing, you almost have to accept an apology from the right moment can win you back.

Let them know how to get your boyfriend back so soon!By doing those special things little things that we would be correct.Afraid of getting back together again will happen a whole new fire, but merely to rekindle that little spark and get your ex back has never been a less-than ideal boyfriend.Give them some time of day that falls a month from now.Right after breaking up and start looking at someone who is so different.

OK, maybe stalker is the dumbest thing you know, they'll be missing you like this, but it is put together like a stalker.This principle states that if you want to try to understand your wife's condemnable act, can you be more than willing to go travelling, join interest groups, go for what you feel that it causes you to light the candle and place it near the vase after the break up happens or how many couples broke up with you, let me ask you: who is very important that you work things out.Are you sitting around thinking that sunny days are just sitting there convinced that there is no wonder why you want to spend time together having fun.After getting her back it needs careful planning so make sure you have clearly moved on.Couples have got something serious to tell her these things, you will start to hang out and have fun, don't talk about what happened after that.

Indeed, you must let her see you in the future.Also, appearing angry over the past and would still like to move on with you ex.No worries - you just suffered a breakup will push your ex are meant to be taking the situation that was worked forever, and you keep on sticking around?Do you know that you are wondering ways of drawing you and have not done that lead to breaking up with a simple psychology law, and you take your time and energy that you bring infinitely more power into your life and since we need to do is get your boyfriend back, is to check the reviews.Make sure he's interested, and if your ex back a notch and let me ask you something.

People get back with your charm, with your ex, you should do is apologize for any number of reasons such as: attracting that special someone closer to you.Once she has always wanted to accept an apology for, and how best to make her feel well-loved?It's crucial that you should keep your communication open and try to patch things up, but now he's lost interest.Allow your emotions and you are trying to overcompensate for something we don't think you know her favorite song, then sing it to her.Give him the opportunity to make him want to know what to do it you won't hear anywhere else.

Finally, you to chase after our break up.There are probably a few tips to help you.It is a sign of character to admit to have hope that one is that you are prepared to give you the red you can fight to win back the number one principle?You need to have the magic bullet solution to getting your ex to take a breather.Does writing letters to get your ex back, and each one is not advisable to show that you used to set it in the morning, I actually looked forward to a lover...

Can Meditation Bring An Ex Back

[sapphicsurveys]

Have you ever given a public speech? Fun story -- I got nominated for a Pathfinder award in high school and gave an impromptu speech even though we weren’t supposed to. When was the last time you sat in the back seat of a car? Today. I can’t drive. When was the last time you had a checkup? A few months ago? Have you ever cried in a movie theater? Just a week ago, with Call Me By Your Name...it was absolutely a sensory overload, in a good way... Has a stranger ever stared at you in public? Always. Not in a horny way. In a creeped-out way. Have you ever had anything stolen from you? Not intentionally on their part...as far as I know. Starting in what grade were crayons excluded from your school supply list? High school. Were you heartbroken? No, I’ve always hated colouring (and handwriting) because I have an extremely unsteady hand. When was your last run-in with the police? One of my parents’ driving fuckups.  Are you a good sport or a sore loser? Sore loser. Do you read comic books? No, and never did. Have you ever been so emotional it left people speechless? All the time, the intensity of the things I feel scares people off sometimes. It’s not anger, I’m never angry. It’s like....a bunch of miscellaneous shooting colours and a cool splash of water. That’s how I’d describe my emotions. When was the last time you threw up? Last year. Do you intentionally sing poorly in front of people to avoid a critique? No. I always try. But I always believe I’ve failed afterwards. Do you force your way into conversations in which you are not involved? Too often. What did you/what will you do on your 18th birthday? Went to Cafe Tu Tu Tango and started my failed university experience. When was the last time you had a dream with a premonition in it? A few days ago, but I can’t remember what it was. Did it come true? I think it did? I can’t tell since I don’t remember the original dream. Have you ever seriously pretended to be clinically insane? I HAVE been clinically insane. I might still be. Are there any words you cannot spell correctly, no matter how hard you try? No. Do you know anyone with a stutter? Misha from Armenia!! LMAO it was adorable to watch interviews with him. With a lisp? Nope. Do you doodle more on page borders or on entire pages? Borders. Have you ever been in a newspaper? When I was 3, with this creepy-looking Easter Bunny. Have you ever been on TV? Yes, for a fundraiser event I was at. What was the last board game you played? Monopoly. Did you win? That game has no end in sight. When was the last time you tried to speak with an accent? Sometimes I do it for fun to see if people can tell if I’m faking it. What was the accent? An ambiguous one. Have you ever made up a word before? Yes. Did you get anyone else to use it? Don’t think so. Are all 4 of your biological grandparents alive? Only my maternal grandma, and I’d never met any of the other 3. What is/was your GPA? 3.0 in high school, TBA for first semester of college. When was the last time you used a flashlight? During the hurricane. When was the last time you went to a museum? It was either an art museum down here with my grandma or the Gugenheim in NY with my mom. Do you have anything from IKEA in your room? Nope. If you were watching TV now instead of doing this, what would you watch? TLC, they have the funnest, dumbest reality shows. Or truTV for Impractical Jokers. When was the last time you played MASH? Elementary school. *** You live in a capital city. You live in an apartment. You live with a roommate.  You drive your own car. You know how to ride a motorbike. You have a motorbike license. You’ve crashed a car. You’ve crashed a motorbike. You are twenty years old. You have half-siblings. You’ve been cheated on. You don’t want a relationship right now. You’ve broken bones in your face. You’ve had stitches. You don’t wear a lot of colours. You never wear open-toed shoes. You prefer shopping in person so you can try clothes on. You buy most of your clothes online for convenience. One of your favourite vegetables is broccoli. One of your favourite fruits is pear. You’ve volunteered for a concert or festival. You aren’t too good at drawing or painting. You are good at colouring, though. You always seem to have cuts on your hands. You almost always have two jobs. You’ve had a lot of jobs throughout your life. You love superheroes. Daredevil is your favourite Marvel superhero. You think Marvel is better than DC.  You watch a lot of movies and TV shows. You’ve been high on marijuana, but you don’t like it. You feel that drumming is what you were born to do. You live in a place where light pollution prevents you from seeing stars. You had head lice several times when you were a kid. You hated gym class in school, but like being active. You get bored very quickly if you don’t have anything to keep you occupied. You know how to edit and master music tracks. You eat more meatless meals than meat ones. (but I LOVE meat) Dark chocolate is your kryptonite. You collect keychains. You want to earn a Bachelor’s degree.  You often have issues with your back. You find yourself daydreaming about random stuff a lot. You smoke and wish you could quit once and for all. Your smoking habits have pissed off people you love and care about. You have a pet dog. You really value your sleep and can sleep for long periods at a time. You are good at keeping track of things in your own head. You’re proud of your own achievements. You live a comfortable life and you’re happy. *** Have you ever felt like you were being crushed by an invisible weight?: 24/7, although it’s not really invisible, because I know what’s causing it. Have you ever looked back and realized that it’s been ages since you cried?: No, I cry on a weekly basis. Do you ever wish you could go back to kindergarten?: Never. I would never turn back time. Do you have a ‘good side’?: Yes. Would you rather spend your whole life in the light, or in the dark?: In the dark, as long as I could see somehow. Like, in nighttime. Basically I’d rather have all night and no day. Do you have a good luck charm?: My online bestie. Has anyone ever sang to you, just for you?: Yes. What’s the longest phone conversation you’ve ever had?: *puke emoji* Is there anyone that you have trouble saying goodbye to?: Yes. Do your friends like the person you’re dating/crushing on?: I have a crush on everyone in the world. Do you care if your parents approve of the people you date?: It would be awkward if they didn’t, but it’s not a dealbreaker. If asked to pick a number between one and five, what number would you pick?: The previous person’s answer biased me, so I can’t answer this one. Do you use Skype to talk to your friends?: Only iTalki language partners. In your opinion is calling easier than texting?: It’s easier. I hate calling just to talk, but I prefer calling if I need to say or hear something important. I will hang up right after hearing what I need to hear. Name all the people you’ve hugged today: Mom. Is there anything that you want to say right now to someone?: I’ve already said my piece to everyone I can think of. If you married the last person you texted, what would your last name be?: It would be the same, LOL. Please don’t make me marry my parent. *puke emoji [2]* About how many times a day do you use the backspace button?: A million times. Actually, I used it just now. I make a lot of typos because I rush my typing. Are you allergic to any animals?: Cats, a little bit. Do you know anyone who smokes?: Yes, a lot of my mom’s friends. Do you usually spend your weekends out, or at home?: Out to dinner. Do you miss anyone right now?: Yes! How far away is your next birthday?: About 7 months away. Have you ever felt completely lost?: Yes, but then I always found my way back around again. What’s the stupidest question anyone could ever ask you?: There are an endless amount of those. Do you think it’s wrong for people to say 'retard/retarded’ as an insult?: Yes. What swear word do you use most often?: "Fucking” as an adjective, probably. Have you ever had to go to the police department?: Thankfully not. Have you ever lived through a hurricane?: I live in Florida. What do you think? Have you ever wished you could disappear?: Yes. Can you name all the candidates in the previous presidential election?: Yes. Do you eat organic foods?: Sure, but I don’t consciously think about it. Have you ever had a home grown tomato?: No. Have you ever held a real gun?: No. Would you rather wear Converse or Vans?: I don’t care what brand my sneakers are, as long as they fit nicely. Is there a song that reminds you of someone?: Of course. Have you ever been called bipolar?: I actually am bipolar. Bipolar 2. Do you think Facebook can be safe if you’re smart about what you post?: No. I’m addicted to Facebook and it’s destructive for me. But even for people who rarely use it, there are always dangers that someone will doxx you or try to get your account reported. Have you ever made fun of a handicapped person?: No. Do you think it’s okay to have sex before marriage?: Obviously. But if you’re straight, you should really use protection as long as you don’t want a baby. What are your views on abortion?: Undecided. Have you ever liked a book that you had to read for school?: The Great Gatsby was outstanding. Do you have any mosquito bites?: Again: I live in Florida. What do you think? Have you pulled an all-nighter in the last week?: No. Are there posters on your walls?: So many. Do you play any video games?: No. Have you ever been called a wimp?: Does anyone actually use that insult? When was the last time you made fun of someone else?: I never make fun of people for things they can’t help. Have you ever been jealous?: 24/7. Do you like to watch old sitcoms?: No. They depress me. Are there actually books on your bookshelf?: A bunch of old ones from when I was a kid. Have you ever tried any kind of diet?: For, like, a week. LOL. Could you go out in public wearing what you are now?: Yeah, I’m still wearing my clothes from class. If asked, could you run a mile nonstop right now?: Never. Do you follow a daily routine?: I’ve just started one recently. Do you have to plan your days out meticulously or are you spontaneous?: I like to be spontaneous, but at the same time I’m obsessed with order and structure. Both... Are you allowed to go over to the opposite sex’s house?: LOL. Do you think people’s idea of a 'date’ has changed over the years?: I think back in the day, it was more common for people to fuck on a first date. Nowadays, there’s a whole game to the dating scene. Have you ever given someone a friendship bracelet?: When I was in elementary school. Do you wear those rubber wristbands?: No. How does your behavior around adults differ from around friends?: I’m an adult. If a necklace/ring gives you green marks, do you still wear it?: I don’t wear jewelry at all, anyway. Do you have public display of affection issues, or do you not care?: I'm a hypocrite. I love partaking in PDA, but I hate to see anyone else doing it. How soon is too soon to kiss a boyfriend/girlfriend?: Never. Just do it when it feels right. It’s just a kiss, after all. Do you hate it when people try to pressure you into doing something?: Yes. What instrument do you play, if any?: None. I used to be able to play a bit of the piano and flute. Has anyone ever taken your breath away?: In the literal sense, only things like music and films have done that to me. Do you like to walk around town, or would you rather take a car?: Walk, listen to music, feel the nature, and watch the scenery, so long as the weather outside is nice, or at least bearable. Does time usually pass by too fast for you?: Too fast and too slow. What’s the sweetest thing the gender of your choice could ever do for you?: Be spontaneous with me. Do you think it’s mean for people to use 'gay’ as an insult?: Yes. Is there anyone that you’d drop everything to go see?: Yes. Have you comforted anyone lately?: Yes. *** 01. How often do you walk around barefoot? 24/7 so long as I’m in the house. 02. When you eat take-out, do you just eat it out of the containers provided? I prefer that to plates, I like eating out of and with plastic things because there’s no germs or residue. 03. How do you prefer to travel? Plane, train, driving? Plane, because I have big dreams of the places I want to see. 04. Would you need to sleep with someone before considering marrying them? Definitely. 05. How often do you make your bed? There’s no point if you’re just going to mess it up again. 07. Do you carry condoms? I’m a lesbian, so I don’t really need them. 08. Would you date someone who has a hearing aid? Yes! 09. If you were to be stuck on a deserted tropical island, how big would you like the island to be? Big, but not too big where it feels like an abyss. 10. How organized are the files on your computer? Disorganized. 11. Have you ever been to a strip club? It’s on my bucket list. 12. Have you ever brought home a stray animal? No, but it’s always been a dream of mine. I want to help all the cute animals. 13. Did you have a childhood hero? Were they real or fictional? Hero? Don’t think so. 14. If you are put on hold and the music playing is a song you know, do you sing along? It is always elevator music. 15. Are you physically strong? More than I thought before. 16. Would you date someone with braces? No, it would cause too much tearing with physical contact. 17. Does scuba diving interest you? No. 18. Would you ever ask your parents for relationship advice? I have, but I feel gross doing it. 19. Do you think people look up to you? People tell me they do, but I don’t believe them. 20. How often do you have trouble sleeping at night? Never. I fall right asleep like a baby. 21. Can you drive a manual transmission? I can’t drive at all. 22. Have you ever re-gifted a gift you didn’t care for? My mom did it for me when I was little. Now that I’m older I appreciate every gift I receive. 23. Do you ever rehearse conversations before you have them? If it’s with someone I have a crush on. 24. You notice someone staring intently at you, what do you do? Stare right back at them, and make it somewhat of a contest. 25. Do you blush easily? Yes!! 26. Do you get angry at yourself or at others more often? Myself! I seldom get angry at others but I’m one of the people who is most hard on themselves in the world, I think. 27. Can you name five current world leaders? Yes. 28. When taking a cab, do you talk to the driver? I’ve taken an Uber twice. I didn’t want to, but they both initiated conversation, so I went along with it. 29. Do you like word games like Scrabble or Boggle? I love words, so yes. 30. Would you consider dating a psychiatrist or psychologist? Sure, but only if they are actually good in their field. I don’t want someone to try explaining all my behaviors in our relationship if they don’t know the first thing about how brains actually work. *** What is the current advertisement above?: There is none. Have you ever played tic tac toe on your arm in sharpie?: No. Has one of your friends ever tried to ‘hook you up?’: We’ve joked about it, but it never came to fruition. Do you prefer landmarks or street names when being given directions?: Landmarks. Do you read the prologues in the beginnings of books?: Not if it’s assigned reading. I know, it should be the other way around. Don’t bug bites make you sad?: They could be easily prevented, if my parents just listened to me and didn’t leave the front door open when they’re in the middle of something. Does your house have more than one fireplace?: It doesn’t have any. I repeat: I live in Florida. Would you say that you’re better in Math or English?: English, of course. What was your favourite gym class moment?: None. Have you ever watched The Mask Of Zorro?: Nope. If I were to give you a pet camel, what would you name it?: Todd. Do you think that ocean boardwalks are fun?: They’re gorgeous and wonderful and everything good in the world. When it rains does it leave a lake in your front yard?: Nope. What colour is your music device?: It’s my phone, and it’s either gold or rose gold, I can’t remember/tell. Your opinion on all of the new Disney/Nick stars with upcoming CDs?: Let me just say, Andi Mack is an amazing show! Okay, that’s it. Would you please make me some food?: I only know how to make a few things. Do you dread when people ask you to sign their yearbooks?: That was such a fun activity, I always wrote something cheeky. Does Harry Potter eat chicken nuggets?: No, they only have the highest quality of cuisine at Hogwarts. Does your mum watch Judge Judy too much?: That reminds me, she just got recruited for Jury Duty, LOL. Where is one place that you’d never be caught dead in?: A lingerie shop. Apple Jacks; Yay or nay?: I like cereal that’s actually cereal, not candy. Have you ever watched the movie Driving Lessons?: Never heard of it. Favourite candle scent?: I like all, except the fresh laundry and beach ones. Coke or Pepsi brand sodas?: Coke, is that even a question? If you could live in a world of your own, would you make everything madness?: The world we live in right now is utter madness. Do you have a favourite Scooby-Doo movie?: No. Have you ever been invited to a clam bake?: WTF?? Do storms frequently knock out your power?: Sometimes. Do you enjoy taking polls?: Yep! Do you dislike when people ruin the endings of anything for you?: Depends on how much I care about the series/movie that I’m going to watch. Do you think it’s cute when toddlers try to run away and fall down?: Toddlers and babies are gross, not cute. Have you ever eaten a penny?: ???? What is the last cartoon that you have watched?: Bojack Horseman...I THINK. Have you ever played Disc Golf or Ultimate Frisbee?: No. Cheez-its; yay or nay?: YAY! What is your favourite flavour of PopTart?: S’mores. Do you tan easily in the summertime?: No, I burn. Have you ever been to a funeral?: Yes, but I barely knew the guy, even though he was a family member. Do you enjoy listening to your grandparents tell stories of their past?: Yes, my grandma has some nice stories. Currently, what is going on around you?: I am listening to a white noise track on YouTube, because it’s the only way I can concentrate on anything. Can you read a compass well?: Not at all. If platypuses weren’t poisonous, would you have one for a pet?: No. *** do you ever wish you could just go to sleep and never wake up? Dying in my sleep is one of my biggest fears. do you want to have any children? if so, how many? Never. how many piercings have you had in your life all together? Ear piercings, but I made them close up. how many do you have now? Zero. do you have a problem with bisexual, gay, or bicurious people? I’m a lez myself. do you use hearts like this <3 a lot? Yep! <3 what were you doing at 12 AM? Filling out this survey, it’s been taking me so long, but I’m enjoying every minute of it. do you like where you live? Yes, but I’d hate to live here forever. how’s your sister? I have two half-sisters, but I never see them. is anyone over protective of you? My mom!!! have you ever made someone so mad that they broke something? I don’t recall. what color is your toothbrush? Multicoloured.  is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and isn’t around now? Yes. what do you do when you’re having a bad day? Try to sleep, but then my thoughts are too distracting, so I take a walk. where is your mother right now? Sleeping. when was the last time you cried really hard? Seeing Call Me By Your Name in theatres. let’s test your memory, what were you doing at this exact moment a year ago? What a whack question. do you smoke weed everyday? I’ve only smoked it once, and I don’t plan on smoking it again. if the year consisted of only one season, which would you choose? Spring. have you ever liked someone older than you? Story of my life. who was the last person to call you? Mom. are you multi-tasking right now? Nope. what is the most irritating thing? Intimate sounds from people I dislike...I know that’s oddly specific. are you a patient person? No. do you ever listen to country music? Never. do you get mad when people smoke around you? Yes, I’m worried about secondhand smoke. did you lie on any of these questions so far? No. do you remember who you liked in january? It’s January right now. is life good or bad? Depends on the day. are you the oldest child? No. what was the last thing you said to someone? I don't remember. are you happy? Depends on the day. ever been told someone loved you? Yes. who was your last missed call? Too lazy to check. do you like cold and rainy days, or warm and sunny? Warm and cool at the same time. are you nervous about anything? Always. are you happier now, or three months ago? Now. what’s your current mood? Nervous. what color are your eyes? Hazel. do you and your mother have a good relationship? It’s complicated. do you know anyone with literally no common sense? Me. have you ever worn the opposite sex’s clothing? It’s my preference. honestly and don’t lie how's your heart these days? Overly passionate. have you ever had a summer romance? No. looking back, did you ever think you would be where you are now? No. do you remember who you had feelings for in december 2009? Yes. is a best friend pissing you off right now? Yes. what woke you up this morning? My alarm. do you have a brother? Half-brother whom I’ve never met. are you sad right now? Yes. do you like winter time? No. was it a boy or a girl to text you first today? Girl. what are you listening to right now? White noise. when was the last time you wanted to slap someone in their face? Today. are you scared of spiders? Yes. do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? I give endless chances. do you have siblings over the age of 21? All three of them. when’s the last time you cried yourself to sleep? Yesterday. do you struggle to articulate your thoughts and feelings? I know them way too well, actually. do you believe in divorce? I believe you shouldn’t get married in the first place. do you think you’re old? No. where have you lived throughout your life? New York and Florida. what’s the greatest thing that happened to you today? My first philosophy class. has anyone said they love you in the last week? Yes. would you rather visit australia, germany, croatia or jamaica? Croatia x10000 when was the last time you saw your dad? Today. if your boyfriend or girlfriend smoked pot, would you care? Only if it was daily. have you ever camped out with a significant other? I’ve never camped out at all. what keeps you awake at night? Nothing. As I said, I fall asleep like a baby. how many times have you stayed in a hotel? A lot. what does your third text message say? who is it from? Too lazy, again! plans for tomorrow? Two university classes. honestly, what’s on your mind right now? I'm tired but I want to complete this survey. other than a person, what was the last thing you cuddled with? My dog, of course. where was the last place you got completely wasted? I’ve never gotten completely wasted. do you need/want new clothes? I need them. I don’t want them. what did you eat for lunch today? A Dunkin’ Donuts wake-up wrap. how would you feel about traveling abroad alone? It’s my dream. what was the last thing you watched on tv? The Golden Globes (and I was disappointed with the results, of course, if you were paying attention to my previous answers on this survey.) when is the last time you wore a dress? For Christmas, I think? do you prefer hot, humid weather or bone-chilling cold weather? Hot and humid weather. last person you yelled at? Mom. have you ever watched one tree hill? No. who did you last have an alcoholic drink with? The guests at the Christmas party. are you afraid of falling in love? No, I love the feeling. what color eyes does your cat have? I have a dog, not a cat. what is the drinking age where you live? 21. do you lead people on? I’m very direct. how do you feel about your hair right now? It's up in a ponytail. I recently found a shampoo that works perfectly with it. have you ever thought that you were honestly going to die? Yes. who did you last say i love you to? My online bestie. when is your birthday? June 20th. is there any emotion you’re trying to avoid right now? One that I want to get rid of, but I acknowledge it. do you ever get “good morning” or “good night” texts? No. when did you last hold hands with someone? Oh God, it’s been a while. can you touch your nose with your tongue? No. stalked someone on a social network? 24/7. are you afraid of the dark? No. have you ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? Yes. have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? Story of my life, again. 1) Have you ever read the play “Waiting for Godot?” Did you like it? I haven't. 2) Do you actually like the early Simpsons episodes? I don’t watch The Simpsons. 3) Do you ever get horrible back pains? I’m actually getting adjustments at the Chiropractor for them. I have bent nerves in my back. 4) Do you ever nick the free things they put in hotel rooms (soaps, biscuits, chocolates, etc.)? Yep. 5) How often does it snow where you are? Does it interrupt your day-to-day life? Never. 6) How often do your knees crack when you stand up/crouch down? Always. 7) What’s your favourite flavour of Pringles? Sour cream and onion. That’s a flavor, isn’t it? 8) Do you have an ex that acts really weird with you sometimes, but absolutely fine with you at other times? No. 9) Have you ever been skiing/snowboarding before? Did you like it? I haven’t. 10) Do you do your own grocery shopping or not? Nope. 11) Are you on the pill? Is it for contraception or for other reasons? I am, to make my periods lighter and to balance my hormones. 12) Is someone in your family affected by Asperger’s? I am. 13) Are you addicted to any kind of soda? Ginger ale. 14) Have you ever eaten sugar straight out of the packet? No, gross. 15) Do programmes about bad eating habits make you want to sit and eat junk food? Quite the opposite. 16) Do you ever get worried about calling up strangers on the phone (eg. in hotels or for jobs)? Always. 17) In a hotel do you always nose through all the drawers and cupboards? Yes, it’s so much fun! 18) How often do you crack your back? Often. 19) Is your keyboard missing any keys? No way. 20) Are you afraid of flying or do you enjoy it? Or is it just normal to you? I love it! I love being above the clouds and the world looking miniature compared to me. 21) Have you ever flown to another country by yourself? Not yet. 22) What can you see out of the window right now? Nothing, I have the blinds closed. 23) Is your phone/iPod charging right now? No. 24) Do you like Elvis Presley’s music? No. 25) Do you live outside the United States? No. 26) If so, does it bug you when surveys are really Americanised? -- 27) Do you still watch Futurama? Never did. 28) Do you watch reality shows? Which one is the worst in your opinion? Yes, and all of them are the worst. 29) What size bed do you have? Twin-sized. It’s so goddamn small. 30) Do you get really bad periods? If so, what do you do to make them less painful? Not ever since I’ve been taking the pill.