#I know you're out there and I hate to be a party pooper. That's why I left really!

[isablooo]

every time i blink theyre doing another terrible adaptation of a gothic novel will i ever be free

[thyandrawrites]

Dabi danced then changed clothes and burned himself to near death again and everyone just left the fandom hdjsjshdhjs like his chapters used to give us early leaks just saying 💅 (but srs the pacing of this last arc has been horrible, for understandable reasons but still, and even tho the volumes have been selling well in japan bnha is not important or relevant to SJ currently so i wonder if hori doesnt hurry with the ending it wont eventually get canceled)

I don't think a title like bnha is under risk of being cancelled, ever, what with it being in the top ten sellers of the year. The rushing is just pacing issues and possibly editorial interference imho. The former is something Hori admittedly always suffered from. Overhaul's needlessly long arc comes to mind as the first example, but then also the overarching Todofam plot went at a snail pace, so much so that fans predicted where it would eventually go years before it became the focus. Hori's not the best at figuring out how much space to give to big plot points, and with the story reaching its climax and many character arcs converging, he sort of... Let down a lot of expectations? He tried to give everyone space but sorta ended up with a big messy soup imo.

But tbh it wasn't even the pacing issues for me. My passion for the series dwindled when a lot of character arcs took weird directions or straight up stopped moving. Which is as much Hori's fault as it is mine I suppose. I expected bnha to act more on its premises than Hori really wanted to, and as a result felt pretty "meh" when entire plotlines were swept under the rug or forgotten about in favor of character stagnancy and protecting the status quo

It's just... Eh. I'll own up to the fact that I probably shouldn't have expected the story to go my way, but I also think Hori wasn't entirely honest, either. The quality of the writing took a nosedive when Hori got scared by his own premises and backtracked. Personally, I find it a dishonest way to tackle the plot. Either commit or don't hype it up as though you intend to

[boysmentfs]

The fraternity party.

It was Saturday morning and as Timothy knew, today was a day full of alcohol and sex at the fraternity and like every Saturday, he couldn't study with the music so loud.

Timothy stood up from his bed, rubbed his eyes and put on his glasses, the boy was cute, with just his cute brunette hair combed halfway down, his cute glasses and his baby face and with only 1"60 height, They made Timothy one of the cutest guys in college even though everyone knew he was gay and a nerd.

"Good morning, I guess" Timothy commented as he got out of bed and went to the closet to put on something comfortable, it was Saturday, it was sunny and he was just going to be studying all day, So he just put on a white t-shirt, jeans and sandals.

Once he got ready, he sat on his bed with some books, pencils, notebooks and started studying, it had to be like this because he had a scholarship and he couldn't waste this moment, His dream was to be a scientist so he had to study a lot, it didn't affect him, he loved studying.

"I will have a future, not like that idiot Jack and his "brothers" " Timothy commented while letting out a chuckle.

While someone was laughing, or rather something, interrupted the moment, Timothy continued with his thing while saying a "come in" The moment they opened the door, to their dismay it was Jack, He was shirtless, wearing short shorts showing off his amazing hairy legs and a pair of sandals showing off his large, masculine feet.

Even though Timothy hated Jack, he actually had a crush on him but it was obvious that he would never tell him, because if that happened he knew his life would change completely.

"Hey! Lil' bro, I came to invite you to our frat party and well, I also wanted to know if we could be friends, you know? I had an argument with that idiot Luke"

Timothy looked at him and raised an eyebrow, Jack wasn't the typical idiot jock who made fun of him for being gay or nerdy, but he found it quite strange that he came to invite him to the party and even more so, Also ask him to be his friend.

"Uhm, Jack, you know that I don't like those parties and also, why would you ask me to be your friend? I mean, there are quite a few differences between us." Timothy commented in a calm and light tone as he continued reading a book.

"Uh, uh, I know that bro, but I don't know, I'm feeling nice today you know? Plus, you'd be a good replacement for Luke, I mean, two of both weren't the same in body or sexual orientation, but you guys are pretty cute and funny, so what do you say, lil' bro? Jack commented with a smile on his face.

"Sorry Jack, but I can't go to your party. Be your friend, yes, but go to your party, no. I have homework to do and a lot more chores, but seriously, have fun!"

"C'mon, bro! Don't be a party pooper, I see you studying every day, you should go out and party for a while to brighten up your life! It'll only be for a little while and then I'll leave you and you can come back to study, okay?"

Timothy turned to look at him and a smile appeared on his face.

"Okay, okay, you win, you're right, I should have some fun, but then I go back to my room to study, okay?

"yeah!" Jack commented as he watched Timothy get up from the bed and walk over to him to stand by his side, their height difference was different.

Once Timothy stood next to Jack, Jack put an arm around him as the two walked towards the frat house, once they arrived Timothy was quite surprised, There were shirtless men everywhere, women flirting with these same men, and quite a bit of alcohol.

Jack's brothers turned to see him and greeted him, Jack grabbed Timothy and they went to where they were, Timothy greeted them and they did too.

"Wow, wow, what do we have here?" one of Jack's bro's commented.

"Well, he'll be our new bro, since that idiot Luke didn't appreciate us and speaking of that"

Jack looked at Timothy.

"This is a frat party, it's hot, it's summer, Luke left some clothes at our frat, go to his room and wear what you like, okay? Back room and turn to the right."

Hearing this, Timothy nodded as he walked into the fraternity house, he wasn't surprised at all, there were clothes lying around, they were dirty, they had a weird smell, just like he imagined, Once he got to Luke's room and opened it, there were still some posters of half-naked women, workout gear, and some stuff lying around.

Jack went to his closet and looked for something clean and that would fit the heat and then he found some brown shorts with palm trees printed on them.

"These are pretty cute, hehe, I can't believe I'm going to wear frat boy clothes! So horny... I hope they fit me well."

Once Timothy told himself that, he took off his jeans and threw them on the floor while he put on Luke's shorts, once he put them on he had to go look at himself in the mirror And luckily for he, there was a full-body one in Luke's room, so he went and looked at himself, it looked pretty cute.

And then before he could get back to Jack, he started to feel weird and hot, the idea of wearing a muscled frat boy's clothes excited him but he didn't realize how much.

The heat that his body felt was too much, so he took off his shirt and let it fall on the floor, while the heat rose even more.

"What the fuck is going on!?" Timothy said while covering his mouth, he had never said a rude thing in his life, so he was in shock.

But before he could continue wondering, he saw with his own eyes how his feet began to become larger and more masculine, His fingers lengthened as a manly scent came from them.

At this point Timothy was so in shock with everything, that he froze, instead of running or calling for help, he stood in front of the mirror with a scared face.

He watched as his thin legs began to increase in size, while becoming stronger, more of an athlete, Muscles began to emerge from these same ones while their skin changed to a more mature one, Now he had two trunks as legs.

He watched as his stomach began to move on its own, burning all the fat he had so that a six pack of abs would appear, They looked very worked out, as if they were in the gym all day, Timothy knew this was all wrong, but he couldn't move.

The next thing to change were his arms, which were once thin but began to swell with pure muscle while his biceps reached the size of soccer balls, some veins stood out on his arms, his hands also changed, his fingers lengthened while now having a more masculine and mature appearance.

His thin chest began to burn as his pectorals began to bulge reaching a great size, they became large and sensitive, His torso expanded along with his shoulders to give him a more jock look.

His face began to creak as he began to change, his Adam's apple becoming even more prominent, All the baby fat he had began to oxidize to give way to a more defined jawline while a small shadow of hair appeared on this same jawline, His lips became fuller, his nose became prettier, his cheekbones became more prominent, but despite all that, he still had a rather cute and baby-like face.

He also increased in height, going from 1'60 to a powerful 1'80 making him the tallest in the fraternity.

His eyes also changed, his haircut also began to change to a more relaxing and masculine look and also somewhat jock, His hair that was brown began to change, The black began to take place to completely disappear into the brown, his hair that was also straight began to change to curly, curls fell on his face.

Timothy began to feel pressure on his cock, it was at that moment that he saw how his cock began to grow bigger under his shorts, Curious to know, he pulled down his pants and his new designer boxers and watched as his penis went from 5 centimeters to about 15 centimeters, His cock was now thick and big, even more so because it was erect, then he began to feel the need to jerk off.

"I have a nice body... Nice face and a nice new cock, why not?" Timothy commented as he began to jerk off his new cock.

As he did this, new memories began to flood his mind, memories of how he joined the fraternity, how he became friends with Jack, how he loved women and their t*ts... No, he was gay... Right?

He also remembered how this morning before the frat party he had gotten into a fight with Jack, Timothy reached orgasm and his "sweet milk" began to spread all over the floor of the room.

"Damn... Just imagining how many girls I'll pick up today and also how I'm going to feed them with my seed makes me pretty horny." Luke comment with his voice, which certainly sounded masculine and very mature.

"Right! There's a party outside, Jack and my other brothers must be waiting for me."

Luke commented and then put his cock in his shorts, left his room and arrived with his brothers.

"Wow, looks like someone isn't mad at me anymore, right Luke?" Jack commented while patting his chest.

they talked for a while and then he asked his brothers to take a photo to upload it for his Instagram.

He knew he was hot and he didn't want to waste any time showing off his great achievements.

[plasticferal]

hey queen! can you pls do an angst story with chris. where they get into an argument and chris said things he never meant. then he apologizes to her afterwards. ( basically angst to fluff)

damsel in distress | chris sturniolo.

i added my own twist to this ask. it's my favourite prompt so thank you! 18+ protective!ex-boyfriend chris x fem!reader. fighting, touches on themes of unwanted attention, mentions of alcohol, explicit language. reader discretion is advised. p.s inspired by the unreleased olivia rodrigo song 'prison for life'.

the house is filled with familiar faces and strangers. a small gathering turned into a full blown house party from the moment the word got out. where the sturniolo triplets are, a flock follows. you sigh, pushing and shoving your way through the unwanted crowd.

all you want is to make it into the kitchen, miraculously being the only place no one wants to linger. the last person you need to see right now is your ex lover. chris is standing ahead of you, leaning on the kitchen counter, alone in the room. you shut the doors behind you, needing to escape. even if it means with him.

“if you wanted to get me alone, you could have just asked." he speaks smug, before taking a sip from his red solo cup.

“i'm not in the mood,” you dismiss. you open the fridge, eyes scanning the shelves but nothing calling your name.

you know you're not actually looking for anything, you just don't want to look at him. the entire night has you shaking with anger. from the mess in your home, the lack of care everyone is taking, the noise complaint you know you'll be getting later, and worst of all, that one guy who won't leave you alone.

you've never seen him before tonight, you don't even know his name, but all he's done is make you uncomfortable. try to dance with you, try to give you drinks. he brushes your waist every time he walks past.

all of your friends have been encouraging you to go for it, to get over chris. and honestly, you consider it for a moment. just to finally move on, but you can't bring yourself to. at least not with some random creep.

the break up is still raw. he tells everyone it was 'mutual' but it was a part on your request. he'd never throw you under the bus like that. he knows why you made your decision, he's never questioned it.

chris feels like it's unrequited love. although, you haven't lost any love for him, no matter how much you try to push him away. he has every right to despise you, but he doesn't.

every time you close a chapter with him, you find yourself in a sequel. it's like you're re-reading different stories, but the ending stays the same. your heart wants him, your brain wants to hate him.

"what's wrong?" he asks, sensing you're genuine in your frustration.

"nothing." you refuse to let him know what's happing in your world, let alone your mind. you don't need to let in him anymore, even though you want to let it out. he's the one person who could just sit and listen to you for hours on end.

"alright, just askin" his words trail off into a hush. he switches the tone, not wanting the conversation to stop.

“your friends are nice” he speaks in a sickeningly sweet tone, because if anyone knows how to kick you while you're down, it's him.

"you would think that" you scoff, implying that you've seen them throw themselves at him all night. him pouring them drinks, smiling and frothing over the attention he's receiving.

"the fuck is that supposed to mean?" his temperamental side seeps out, and you grow only more irritated.

"chris, can you get out please?" you huff, hands crossing over your chest. an unintentional way to seperate yourself from him, a metaphorical wall being put up.

"such a party pooper. you really gotta let loose, relax a bit." his words come out a lot more nasty that you hope he meant them, and it makes your face hot.

you give him the benefit of the doubt and think he's speaking with resilience, at the fact you keep shutting him down.

"i wonder why we ever broke up." you reply sarcastically, a fake smile on your face. he rolls his eyes, finishing off his drink and letting out an audible "ah," like a child finishing a juice box.

"i haven't seen you all night, y/n" his voice softens, and it becomes clear he's speaking for the sake of talking to you. he always wants to talk to you.

looking at the counter quickly to place his cup down, he looks back at you, tilting his head to the side slightly. he's not being horrible to you, he never has been. he's still in your life whether you like it or not, despite your hostility.

"sorry. i'm just tired." you lie. he knows it.

"your poker face isn't very good. i learnt that the hard way," he bounces his eyebrows, biting the tip of his tongue, eyes a bit wider as he stares at the ground and you can tell he's having a flashback.

you chuckle at the reference. the one time he caught you faking an orgasm didn't end very well, and he's been able to catch you out ever since. he's never been afraid to pull you up on your own fibs.

"sorry, again." you hug your body tighter, avoiding his eyes. he pushes himself off the counter with a stretch like hum and walks over to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder.

"stop apologizing, you sound like matt," he rolls his eyes lightheartedly, and you let out a small laugh. that's always his intention, to make you smile.

"c'mon princess, let's get you a drink. seems like you need it." he nods toward to the door, rubbing your shoulder enthusiastically.

you let him try to fix your mood, because god knows you do actually need to stop stressing. you can't control what happens, just how you react. that's what chris always used to say when you were together.

feeling safe in his embrace, he security guard style moves you through the party. he hollers "excuse me!" and "coming through!" and everyone just listens, parting like the red sea. he's not the biggest guy in the room, but he sure is the most assertive. especially with you under his arm.

when you finally get to the drinks table, he makes you a vodka lemonade, saving the rest of the can for himself to finish off. it's not the most thrilling drink, but enough to keep you settled. ease the tension a bit. plus, it tastes good. no harm, no foul. as chris is mixing the liquids into cups, you feel an unwanted hand snake up around your hip.

"there you are. are you hiding from me?" your stomach drops at the voice of the mystery man towering over you, and you look ahead to watch chris's eyes snap up instantly.

chris lowers the cups, holding his eyes on the man behind you. you watch as he kinks his neck and his jaw tenses, taking a step closer. you shake your head at chris, holding a hand up subtly to tell him not to come any closer.

turning around, you stare up at the man. his breath reeks of liquor, and his shirt is drenched is sweat. it makes you sour your face and tense your entire body.

"i don't know what you want from me, but it's not gonna happen. i think you should leave." you speak sternly, trying not to let your voice shake with pure nerves. not even liquid confidence could help you right now.

"the party's just getting started," the man smiles, stumbling toward you in what you think is an attempt at a hug, but you begin pushing his body away from yours with a shove.

"dude, she doesn't want you. walk away." you hear chris's direct voice over your shoulder.

the last thing you want is negative attention on chris in a room full of people who would spread the news like wildfire. you never want that for him.

"it's okay, i got this." you dismiss chris in the nicest possible way, but you're being serious.

"come on, we'll have fun," the man hiccups through his words, mumbling them and tripping over toward you again.

"get the fuck away from her." chris's breath hits the back of your neck as he moves even closer to you.

"christopher, i'm serious. stop." you speak through grit teeth, so people can't read your lips, as he lingers next to you.

you try to be as inconspicuous as you can in your rejection to his advances, but he won't give up. the man appears more annoyed, and he grabs your wrist with a tight grip.

"let go of me." you grab the mans hand, trying to pry his grip without making it obvious.

you’re shaking at the thought of attention drawing. not for you, but for chris. eyes are already on you, being his ex. it's not what he ever wanted for you either. if he could make it all disappear, he would. it becomes more difficult when chris notices, and this time, has no intention of backing down.

"i'm not gonna repeat myself, back the fuck up." chris walks around your body, face to face with the guy who has a hold on you now.

"please, chris." you beg, voice quivering.

you know his temper can change in the blink of an eye. him and matt both have that in common.

"she doesn't need your help, pretty boy." the man splatters his words, a malicious smile on his face as he leans toward chris, almost nose to nose.

chris smiles criminally, flashing his teeth.

"you're right," chris puts his hands up in defence, a downward smile on his face as he chuckles darkly, taking a big step backward.

there's a feeling of relief, and intense fear as he actually does start to back away. but you know chris. unfortunately, it's unavoidable.

you try to catch his eyes, and speak through a begging stare without using words. he looks at you with sadness, and you mime the words, 'please don't'.

the moment the man tugs your wrist as if to leave with him, making you wince with the grip he holds. you regret your counteraction instantly, because chris reacts viscerally.

he flares his nostrils and squeezes his nails into his palm, balling up his hands by his hip. his knuckles are turning white.

before you can get pulled away, chris lunges forward with a tight fist, throwing a strong, perfectly aligned punch to the mans cheekbone. it throws the man to the ground in the blink of an eye, relieving the pressure on your skin. you stumble backwards, out of the line of fire.

chris steps heavily forward, shoving a foot into his ribcage before straddling his legs, completely overpowering him. the man projects forward to swing and hit chris's mouth. chris doesn't even flinch, like it was painless. you watch chris raise his arm up again to pummel down onto the now defenceless stranger.

the surrounding crowd gasps and yells, clearing the space that chris has created with his actions. iphone cameras flash, making you feel sick. the whispering and gossip you can already hear pounding in your head is overwhelming.

you feel so futile. chris is too in his own world to even realise the repercussions. you're not saying the guy didn't deserve it, you have no care in the world for him. you care about the aftermath.

in a fantasy world, a daydream, a fairytale even, this is attractive. a knight in shining armour, fighting for his lady. a world where there are no consequences, or social media, or fear. a reality chris has suddenly forgotten about.

he looks natural doing it, too. the veins in his arms so prominent, his tight mouth and huffed breaths as he gives it everything he's got.

you're frozen in shock, watching chris pelt another punch into the man, and you want to pull him off, you know you need to, but all your body can do is watch. watch the two men roughhousing and exchanging blows, chris taking every hit with pride.

you're numb to the feeling, screaming in your head.

appearing out of thin air, nick and matt are in your line of vision, hiding the chaos ahead of you. his brothers move into action before anyone else needs to.

they've obviously been summoned, but there's a part of you that believes they could just sense it. like they telepathically knew chris was getting himself into trouble by the lack of surprise they express.

nick grabs chris by the collar of his shirt, pulling him off. matt grabs his wrists, to stop him from using his fists. the fight comes undone, finally, but chris is disoriented. he spits onto the man as he's being escorted into the kitchen by his brothers.

your eyes burn with tears that refuse to fall, and matt sweeps your hand up, guiding you with them in a hurried manner. matt is trying to snap you back to reality, but it's just white noise.

chris hits his palm aggressively with frustration against the door frame of the kitchen as you all walk through, and you take a deep breath to compose yourself. your eyes are still welling as you choke back a sniffle, and you're not sure if it's shock, hurt, or anger anymore.

you're in a trance as you walk over to the freezer. your body is in autopilot, moving without you even knowing. you grab a frozen bag of vegetables out of the tray.

"so fucking stupid," you say nastily under your breath, slamming the door shut.

walking over to chris who's sat up on the ledge of the sink. you throw the packet at his chest, and he grabs it, questioning you for a second before matt walks over and shows him to place it on his bruised and red raw knuckles.

the room is filled with tension.

matt is biting his nails, you're leaning against the closed door, and nick finds himself squatting on the floor.

"what the actual fuck was that?" nick is too stunned to even yell, he just speaks aloud.

"i asked you not to, chris. i could have handled it myself." you shake your head, vision blurry as you stare vacantly ahead. you want to lash out at him, but for some reason you can't.

"yeah, it really looked like you had it under control." he crushes the frozen packet harshly against his hand.

"we'll leave you two alone." matt cuts through awkwardly, shooting nick a warning glare.

matt knows it's not his place to go off at chris right now. he'll do that later.

"but-" nick begins, and matt snaps toward the door. you hear nick sigh, knowing he would love nothing more than to stay and listen to you tear into chris. alas, they both leave promptly, matt flashing you a sympathetic smile on the way out.

you can hear from the other side of the door, both nick and matt are hustling trying to kick everyone out. it’s a weight lifted off your shoulders. the literal mess being left behind is the least of your worries now.

you're alone with chris in the kitchen again, the second time not being anymore pleasant than the first. you blame yourself fully for dropping your guard, even if for a second.

“i begged you not to, chris.” you repeat with a stern tone, laced with betrayal and genuine hurt.

he’s silent for a moment, staring at you from across the room with no emotion on his face. you know he feels terrible, he doesn’t have to show it. or tell you.

“did you think i was just gonna stand and watch?” he rebuttals.

“i would have preferred that, honestly.” you don’t understand how he can’t grasp the intensity of the situation.

"did you want him? go back out there then." he's bitter, pointing at the door. you roll your eyes, shaking your head in disbelief.

"chris," you start. he keeps talking.

“because i’m sure he’s still laying on the floor. go ahead. he might have a hard time talking now, though.” chris shrugs, speaking in a provoking manner.

“you’ll be lucky if he doesn’t press charges." you apprise.

“he should feel lucky i didn’t do worse.” he takes another step toward you, presumptuous in the way he carries himself.

"you've done a lot of stupid shit, chris. but that," you raise your hand as you speak, laughing in shock.

"that was unbelievable." you pinch the bridge of your nose, taking yet another deep breath.

"you know what's unbelievable is how you haven't even thanked me once" he ignores your words and bites back with irritation, face growing more twisted with upset.

"thank you?" you repeat, jaw dropping. you step toward him this time. you feel dejected trying to get him to understand.

"thank you for what? for causing a scene? for putting yourself in danger?" you step forward again, feeling like you could drive your heels into the ground beneath you.

"you're acting insane" he brings his hands to his head, tugging at his own hair with despair. his words sting, despite the back and forth arguing.

"you're the one that lashed out on that guy with no consideration for anyone else around you. that's insane" you speak with physical gestures unconsciously.

you're trying to reason with him, but with the state he's in, it's like trying to put a brain in a statue. you examine him, trying to search for his eyes but his body won't keep still, twisting and moving around.

"fuck, okay, i get it! i get it, y/n. you're not happy with me. you never fucking are apparently," his words trail off and he waves you away, turning his back to you. he sounds desperate for it to end.

you want to scream at him at the top of your lungs, and quite frankly, you could. your face burns and steam is about to shoot out of your ears.

"you don't need to protect me anymore, chris."

"i saved your ass out there." he speaks with his hand, four fingers direct to your chest. his words are like salt being rubbed into an open wound.

"saved me? that's a fucking stretch. your brothers saved your ass, because you don't think before you fucking act!"

"this is about YOU, y/n! what i did for you!" he slaps the back of right hand into the palm of his left.

"i'm not some damsel in distress that you need to sweep up and put in a tower, chris"

"yeah well at least in a tower you can't attract trouble." he speaks as if it's your fault, and of all the things he's just spit out, that's by far the worst. the most menacing and cut to the bone tone he's used.

"that was low, even for you." you huff, emotions at an all time high.

your breathing feels tight, but instead of reacting, you force yourself to seperate your emotions from the reality of the situation. you're both feeling very intensely, and expressing it the same way.

in hindsight, you could have redirected some of your emotions, but you also wish chris would take back some things he's said. there's no excuses.

chris re-collects himself and turns toward you again. he shrugs his shoulders, like he has nothing left to say. no fight left.

the closer chris is standing the more prominent his face is, and more specifically, his busted open lip.

you gasp in a mix of being upset, and shock. it feels like a piece of your heart is breaking off, seeing his delicate, pale skin so sore.

"your lip, chris." you exhale, stepping toward him.

he flinches when your hand raises to touch his face, and you know now that you've acknowledged it, it's hurting him. neither of you paid any attention to it amongst the turmoil.

"come here." you sigh, pulling his arm, bringing him over to where the paper towels are, in the corner of the sink.

tearing a white square into your hands, you rinse it under cold water lightly before squeezing the saturation out, leaving a damp cloth in your hand.

turning into chris's body, he looks down at you. he's still at last, and looks like he has no thoughts behind his now seemingly innocent eyes.

you cup his cheek gently, to turn his face downward. you bring the towel up to his lip, wiping his stained chin and mouth. he lets you, and doesn't even wince. he visibly gives into your touch. he's content.

"i need you to promise me you'll never do something like that again." you pull back, folding over a clean side and then wiping his lip softly, trying not to cause him pain.

"i can't promise that." he speaks in a whisper, as if he doesn't want you to hear his word.

with his lip no longer being red, you toss the damp and crumbling paper into sink, making it a problem for another time.

"why?" you look into his eyes, wiping your hands on your shirt.

his blue eyes are big but blameless, pupils dilated. holding his stare as your arm lowers.

"because if anyone lays a hand on you again, i'm going to prison for life." the piece of your heart that broke off earlier reattaches at his words alone.

chris's much shorter hair is spikey around his ears, and wet at the ends, turning dark brown from his sweat. you caress his messy curls, tucking it over the curves of his ears and taming the wispy strands. you hold his head in your hands, tiling him up and your mouths are inches apart.

"how hard did he hit your head?" you ask against his lips. he chuckles, genuinely.

he's an idiot, undeniably. but the gut wrenching, lawless love he has for you makes him that way. his low, smooth laughter, makes your heart skip a beat.

"i mean it, y/n."

"but i know, i know it was stupid." he admits.

"yeah, it was." you agree, shaking his head around slightly.

he grabs your hands with his own, engulfing them and holding them in his palms. he squeezes your hands, bringing them to his lips and kissing your knuckles.

"i'm sorry." he speaks on your skin.

"like really fucking sorry." he strains his head back with remorse, making his adam's apple more prominent, and he swallows hard. like he's swallowing his guilt.

"i said some nasty things. i wish i could take them back, y/n. i really do."

"i know, chris."

"no, you don't. i'll apologise to you everyday for the rest of my life if i have to. i've been horrible tonight."

"chris, enough," you hush him, the calmness in your tone making him understand you hear him. loud and clear. you need some time to forgive, but you absorb his words.

"i don't know how you didn't smack me in the mouth." he jokes, and you giggle through your breath.

"there's still time," you joke back. and he knows it by your tone.

"i could never bring myself to do that. as much as you deserve it." your banter eases the pressure, and you feel chris squeeze your hands in his again.

you rub your thumbs over his knuckles, looking at the little purple marks forming. he notices your face drop with stress, and he slips his hands away, moving to your hips instead.

"hey, i'm fine. i don't care what happens to me, i just need you to be okay."

"i am okay," you reply. he drops his face with a look that expresses he doesn’t believe you. you give a light eyeroll, and small smile.

"i mean it, i swear.” you raise your pinkie finger to him, to keep your promise. knowing it’s the only way he’ll actually believe you.

chris smiles, weak with his bruised lip, and wraps up your pinkie with his own, wriggling your hands around.

"i'm always gonna want to protect you." he pulls you toward his body. he's so warm, and radiates a magnetic energy that makes you want to collapse into his arms.

you know you don't need him to, but deep down, you would like his protection. his unconditional love. selflessness.

"i'll be sure to send you love letters in jail" you grin up at him, and laughs from the chest.

his voice is like a scratched record, fatigue taking over his body. you swallow hard, all of your senses coming back. he feels so real standing in front of you all of a sudden, like it's not just a dream you're about to wake up from.

"stay the night." you speak mindlessly.

chris brushes your hair from your face, cupping the back of your neck lightly to pull your forehead to his lips, kissing just above your eyebrows gently. he rests his chin on the crown of your head, pulling you tight to his chest in an embrace.

"i'll stay forever if you ask me to."

this is the feeling he fights for. requited love.

[leclerc-s]

track five - birds of a feather, we should stick together

series masterlist

SUMMER BREAK 2023

ines_alonso, charles_leclerc, and oscarpiastri posted new stories

what is genuinely wrong with this man?? why is she standing in the middle of the road?? to take a selfie?? surprise shawty!!

maxverstappen1 replied to your story

maxverstappen1 how much time do you have?? ines_alonso GO TO THERAPY!! maxverstappen1 i'll go when you do ines_alonso that's not fair. you have deeper trauma than me. maxverstappen1 bitch please

alex_albon replied to your story

alex_albon this is such a charles thing to do ines_alonso it was oscar actually alex_albon no freaking way oscar did that ines_alonso oh boy oscar has all of you fooled into thinking he's normal.

francesca.cgomes replied to your story

francesca.cgomes you wouldn't understand the need for perfect lighting, you're a man charles_leclerc in the middle of a road?? francesca.cgomes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do leclerc charles_leclerc you're right, i'm so sorry

logansargeant replied to your story

logansargeant mate, what is that picture of charles? oscarpiastri he pissed me off so i took a horrible picture of him logansargeant what the hell did he do to you? oscarpiastri he called my car ugly piece of metal, after i jokingly said i wouldn't be caught dead in a ferrari logansargeant i will never understand how your relationship works oscarpiastri charles and i like to squabble for shits and giggles. inés hates it.

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ines_alonso we're gonna have fun in sun ☀️🎶

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maxverstappen1 i was unaware we were doing a couples holiday?? where's my invite??

alex_albon lost in the post i guess ines_alonso this was 100% an accident maxverstappen1 traitors, both of you

lilymhe let's run away together and leave the boyfriends behind?

ines_alonso deal, when and where? alex_albon oh i bet [redacted] just let out an unholy screech ines_alonso can confirm that is what just happened. he is now pouting on the couch.

user01 are those, high school musical lyrics?

user02 how the fuck did you recognize that? it's the most generic ass caption. user01 i had a huge crush on vanessa hudgens, i still do, so i naturally watched hsm so many times. user03 THOSE ARE HSM LYRICS!! I WOULD RECOGNIZE THEM ANYWHERE!!

alex_albon i see we're not including the picture where [redacted] almost drowned you

fernandoalo_oficial sorry what? ines_alonso he's being dramatic. alex pushed me off the boat and [redacted] helped me up fernandoalo_oficial i know where you live alexander alex_albon you don't? fernandoalo_oficial that's what i want you to think alex_albon i'm actually scared now

charles_leclerc you look angry in that second picture

ines_alonso some girl was flirting with my boyfriend charles_leclerc understandable, have a good day user03 charles said, not my problem user04 well, if the rumors are true, then i want to know was someone flirting with oscar or charles?? user05 probably charles user03 put some respect on my man oscar ❤ liked by arthur_leclerc user04 arthur leclerc, head of the oscar piastri defense club

francesca.cgomes did you guys play mermaids??

ines_alonso you know it but someone (alex) was being a party pooper and didn't want to play logansargeant common alex albon L alex_albon uncalled for logan francesca.cgomes i would play mermaids with you inés ines_alonso marry me 👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏻💍

sebastianvettel it was nice seeing you inés!

ines_alonso please come back to the grid. we miss you. we need you. sebastianvettel i quite like retirement ines_alonso so did my dad and then he came back

patriciooward wow and no visit??

ines_alonso you literally told me, 'i don't want to see you' patriciooward lies. slander. dishonor on you! dishonor on your cow! ines_alonoso i'm telling rossi! patriciooward I'M TELLING ROSSI!

user06 inés being friends with a bunch of people in different careers will never not be funny to me.

user07 girl is out here collecting friends in different careers like infinity stones user06 it's more like pokémon no? there's only six infinity stones user07 see now that you say that pokémon makes more sense

user08 papaya orange and ferrari red nails?? she's dating charles and oscar confirmed.

user09 nurse, she's out again but also i aspire to be this delusional user08 you'll see that i was right when the confirm it themselves.

oscarpiastri why does it look like you were in four different countries already??

ines_alonso i was only in three oscar! just because your ass is a homebody and prefers to be in australia doesn't mean the rest of us do?? oscarpiastri i was literally in monaco?? bumped into charles and everything maxverstappen1 ahh the proper monaco experience, bumping into prince charles at least once charles_leclerc okay so fuck you max. maxverstappen1 name a time and place baby 😘 kellypiquet 🤨🤨 ines_alonso 🤨🤨 oscarpiastri 🤨🤨 arthur_leclerc 🤨🤨 alex_albon 🤨🤨 fernandoalo_oficial 🤨🤨 danielricciardo 🤨🤨 patriciooward 🤨🤨 f1 🤨🤨 logansargeant 🤨🤨 redbullracing 🤨🤨 lewishamilton 🤨🤨 lorenzotl 🤨🤨 jensonbutton 🤨🤨 scuderiaferrari 🤨🤨 pierregasly 🤨🤨 instagram 🤨🤨 puma 🤨🤨 maxverstappen1 man you guys know what i meant ines_alonso happy pride month i guess 🏳️‍🌈 alex_albon BE WHOOO YOOOOUUU ARRREEE!!! danielricciardo it's okay we support! ALLY!!! maxverstappen1 the three of you can go fuck yourselves

user10 max is never beating the gay allegations after this

user11 this plus the grindr thing, i fear the closet is made of glass user12 to be fair, max does nothing to help the allegations

3 HOURS LATER

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ines_alonso i wanna be your endgame 🩷

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📍 ines_alonso the alternate caption was betty, james, and august if they got their heads out of their ass and dated each other but oscar said that would send people into a coma

user13 THAT'S WHAT WOULD SEND US INTO A COMA?? NOT EVERYTHING ELSE??

user14 girl, not you tagging taylor swift. (also was that for speak now (tv)?)

ines_alonso taylor has to know that i am committed to her and the agony her albums bring me, even when i'm in a relationship (yes it was. nothing better than crying to dear john)

logansargeant IT'S ABOUT FUCKING TIME!! I WAS GOING TO LOSE IT IF YOU DIDN'T ANNOUNCE IT SOON!!

oscarpiastri you're being dramatic logansargeant i'm going to enter a secret relationship and force you to keep it a secret and see how long it takes for you to crack

user15 THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME IS WAS OSCAR AND CHARLES!!

user16 I TOLD YOU GUYS BUT NOOO YOU ALL CALLED ME CRAZY. I EXPECT AN APOLOGY WITH TEARS!! user15 NOT THE FUCKING TIME ANNIE!! user16 IT'S ALWAYS THE RIGHT TIME TO RUB IT IN EVERYONE'S FACES THAT I WAS RIGHT!!

pierregasly THE GROUP CHAT IS FREED FROM THE SHACKLES!!

charles_leclerc calm down calmar, no need to be so dramatic pierregasly DRAMATIC? I KEPT THIS SECRET FOR 2 YEARS CHARLES! 2 YEARS!

alex_albon oh thank god. i can breath again

ines_alonso you're exaggerating albono alex_albon i am not exaggerating, i couldn't handle keeping this a secret any longer.

taylorswift i think the alternate caption would've been much better 😉

ines_alonso holy shit- i died, dead, deceased. rip me. please marry my dad taylorswift tell him to show me the ring first 😂😂 ines_alonso oh my god fernandoalo_oficial you heard the lady!! fernandoalo_oficial please don't feed into her delusions. dumb and dumber do enough of that already charles_leclerc if the lady wants to play mermaids in the middle of the ocean, then we'll play mermaids fernando oscarpiastri yeah fernando, if she wants to play mermaids we'll play mermaids taylorswift oh this adorable

oscarpiastri have i told you that i love you lately?

charles_leclerc funny because this morning you called us 'pain in my ass' oscarpiastri no, i called you that because you set fernando's kitchen on fire again! ines_alonso i love you oscaroo!! charles_leclerc hey!! what about me?? ines_alonso love you charlie

user17 i don't know what's funnier the argument in the comments between oscar, charles, and inés or charles being a pyromaniac when it comes to fernando's kitchen

user18 charles should be banned from the kitchen oscarpiastri we have banned him but he still tries to cook charles_leclerc sebastian would never treat me like this danielricciardo no, he'd treat you worse. that man is controlling in the kitchen and you know it.

scuderiaferrari ❤️🩷🧡

louieee oh baby girl i'm so happy for you and your boys. so glad the three of you finally decided to do this.

ines_alonso thanks for helping max convince me to go on that date 🩷 louieee anything to see that beautiful smile back on your face 🩷

scuderiaferrari admin is definitely shocked and did not catch inés and oscar sneaking into charles' drivers room in australia...last year

mclaren admin over here is also shocked and did not catch charles and inés sneaking out of oscar's drivers room in miami this year... ines_alonso shout out to the best admins ever astonmartinf1 so guess who lied, like a liar ines_alonso no! i swear it's not what it looks like!! astonmartinf1 heart 💔 been 💔 broke 💔 so 💔 many 💔 times 💔

mclaren we call dibs for the next race weekend!!

scuderiaferrari um no 🤓☝️ you guys had her last weekend? astonmartinf1 um actually she's going to be in our garage look what happened last time she was with mclaren scuderiaferrari that was not our fault mclaren according to the footage it was redbullracing maybe she should be in our garage instead scuderiaferrari forget you man mclaren over our dead body astonmartinf1 that can be arranged 😃

patriciooward i would like everyone to know that i have known since the start!!

user19 and when was that pato? patricooward since 2021 user19 2021? I THOUGHT THESE BITCHES STARTED DATING IN 2022?? patriciooward i fear this is common knowledge? user19 TO WHO PATRICIO? TO FUCKING WHO?

user20 oh the mclaren and ferrari teddies. i could die, they're so adorable.

ines_alonso they gave them to me after oscar's mclaren announcement because and i quote, 'you need to have us with you at night when we're not here.' user20 oh that's so fucking cute ines_alonso this was also before they found out i would be working for sky sports

maxverstappen1 glad you're finally happy inés. you deserve happiness 🩷

ines_alonso we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you forcing me to go on that date 🩷 so thanks for that maxie!! charles_leclerc yes, thank you for that max oscarpiastri have i told you how much i like you? as a friend, that is. NO ONE START RUMORS!! maxverstappen1 as if i would ever date you oscarpiastri excuse you, i'm a fucking catch charles_leclerc not that you would ever need to know because that's my boyfriend not yours ines_alonso correction leclerc, *our boyfriend

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charles_leclerc mon soleil et ma lune ❤️ [my sun and my moon]

tagged: ines_alonso, oscarpiastri, patriciooward

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oscarpiastri i see who the favorite in this relationship is..

charles_leclerc she doesn't scream at me when i set the kitchen on fire. you do. oscarpiastri IT WAS 3 IN THE MORNING CHARLES! charles_leclerc even during the day you yell at me! oscarpiastri i'm sorry i don't want our apartment to burn down

arthur_leclerc i want everyone to know that i have caught oscar several times wearing the sally shirt

oscarpiastri sometimes inés forces charles to wear the mater shirt so she gets to wear the lightning mcqueen shirt logansargeant it's true, i've seen it happen. ines_alonso i just want to say kachow!

sebastianvettel so you didn't hate them?

charles_leclerc we agreed to never talk about that again sebastian. ines_alonso no this sounds like a conversation we should be having oscarpiastri i agree, tell us everything sebastian. sebastianvettel oh you two should know what i'm talking about charles_leclerc STOP! PLEASE STOP!

user21 their conversations seem to be so fucking unhinged and i love that

user22 honestly the three of them are so fucking unhinged user21 they're so fucking iconic, i love this for them

patriciooward so that's a no on being your fourth?

oscarpiastri according to charles he will only "tolerate one man in obnoxious orange" patriciooward it's papaya? charles_leclerc it's a shade of orange patricio. patriciooward papaya is not orange charles. it's papaya. papaya is it's own thing.

user23 charles breaking his theme for those two? oh he in love love

user24 never thought i would live to see the day but i love it user23 charles has an emotional attachment to that theme, so this is a surprise

scuderiaferrari congratulations to the happy couple!

mclaren they're not married 💀 scuderiaferrari they could be and we wouldn't even know it. astonmartinf1 speak for yourselves, we would definitely know, fernando would never shut up about it.

user25 HIS SUN AND HIS MOON? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???

user26 THAT'S WHAT THAT MEANS?? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME LECLERC?! user25 BESTIE THE TRANSLATION IS RIGHT THERE!! user26 MY FAT FINGERS CAN'T TOUCH THE TRANSLATION BUTTON!!

maxverstappen1 i know for a fact she's holding a red bull can in that photo

charles_leclerc i will NOT be posting red bull propaganda on my page georgerussell63 WHO THE FUCK TAUGHT YOU THAT WORD? oscapiastri i wonder who could've possible done that alex_albon why the fuck are you teaching him the word propaganda in the first place?! oscarpiastri all i said was that the hatred a specific family was spewing was propaganda against him and the word stuck maxverstappen1 sometimes having you around is good

carlossainz55 what the fuck? what the fuck is this?

charles_leclerc so that is who i forgot to block... maxverstappen1 YOU STILL FOLLOW HIM BUT YOU WON'T FOLLOW ME BACK? charles_leclerc YOU FUCKING CHEATED THAT'S WHY! maxverstappen1 HE CHEATED ON HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND! IF ANYONE IS THE CHEATER IT'S HIM! alex_albon CLOCK HIM MAX! louieee oh max emilian verstappen, you make me so fucking proud sometimes.

oscarpiastri this man is acting as if he didn't purposefully tell us to hard launch because he wanted to piss someone off

ines_alonso right, as if he wasn’t losing his shit earlier charles_leclerc is this what my life is now? you two roasting all the time? alex_albon mate, they do this to you in private all the time already logansargeant the group chat has seen some shit man fernandoalo_oficial she call you and oscar bald headed demons user27 yo, what the fuck goes on in their group chat?

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oscarpiastri one of us has set fernando, jenson, sebastian, and lewis' kitchens on fire, but i won't tell you who🧡 hint: it's the one who gets offended when you call him french

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arthur_leclerc why am i always getting dragged into shit?

maxverstappen1 because dumb, dumber, and dumbest have two people each they always drag into shit alex_albon this shit isn't funny anymore. i've been suffering with max for ages it should be louie suffering not me. pierregasly free us! logansargeant you two try being in the junior categories with dumb and dumber as they fail to flirt fredrickvestiofficial never been so happy to not have an f1 seat louieee i think you mean, they have two drivers they drag into shit because i don't go through half the shit you guys do. just ask alex how much he suffers in my place ines_alonso honestly fuck you guys

aussiegrit congrats on going public, even if it took you months to tell me.

oscarpiastri it was over a year and a half actually. aussiegrit i take back my congratulations oscarpiastri sebastian wouldn't treat me like this aussiegrit disowned. sebastianvettel welcome to the family oscar aussiegrit go away, who invited you?

user27 not oscar choosing an old picture of him and inés to one up charles

user28 we were in the trenches hoping they would end up together since 2017 user27 real and now they're together with charles.

jensonbutton charles is no longer allowed back in my home

charles_leclerc i was just there 2 weeks ago? lewishamilton more like you're no longer allowed in our kitchens except for fernando's, burn that down if you wish. fernandoalo_oficial this is why you lost 2021 lewishamilton this is why i beat you in 2007 fernandoalo_oficial WE WERE EQUAL IN POINTS! lewishamilton I STILL GOT 2ND PLACE OVER YOU!!

user29 the chaos these three bring to the world of f1 is unmatched

user30 no cause what the fuck do you mean mark ended up with fernando and seb in another universe? user31 this is my favorite f1 inside joke ever

nicolepiastri is this why you said he was never allowed to cook in the house?

charles_leclerc HE TOLD ME YOU DIDN'T LIKE ANYONE IN YOUR KITCHEN?! oscarpiastri i'd like my family to live, thank you very much charles_leclerc you're a liar piastri nicolepiastri every time, every single time ines_alonso imagine what it's like living with them.

user32 all i see is barbie and her kens

ines_alonso I TOLD THEM I WAS BARBIE! alex_albon to be fair, they said you were racer barbie maxverstappen1 then you proceeded to argue over what racing series racer barbie would be in. pierregasly and you called them bald headed demons, again logansargeant all in our group chat while fernando and daniel squabbled over multi-21 for some reason user32 i think i just shit myself...

hattiepiastri the best part about oscar and charles is their girlfriend

ines_alonso best part about oscar is his sisters and mom 🩷 arthur_leclerc and for charles it's his brothers right? ines_alonso no, it's your mom?? arthur_leclerc mommy issues alonso over here fernandoalo_oficial i know where you live leclerc arthur_leclerc nevermind, i take it back. ines_alonso according to charlie i don't have mommy or daddy issues, i have family issues fernandoalo_oficial i know where he lives too. charles_leclerc she was being self-deprecating! YOU SAID THAT WAS ALLOWED! fernandoalo_oficial i will let it slide, this time.

nicolepiastri finally someone who can help you do your laundry

lorenzotl charles dyed all of their white laundry red. fernandoalo_oficial inés caught the washing machine on fire by not clearing out the lint compartment nicolepiastri god help them

user33 i want to know how often charles and inés are causing oscar headaches

oscarpiastri so often that i've lost count. user33 oh it's that bad? ines_alonso he's a bitchass liar is what he is. i've never caused him problems in my life. that is a lie. charles_leclerc i accidently cause problems. it's not on purpose. oscarpiastri inés nearly fell off the balcony trying to grab one of our cats and charles fell down three flights of stairs, more than 5 times already. user33 holy shit, someone get those two hazard pay or something.

lorenzotl maman wants to know if you three are coming over for dinner?

charles_leclerc this couldn't have been a text? lorenzotl oh i tried, someone (you) kept ignoring me so i came here. ines_alonso i would never do this to you lorenzo oscarpiastri i wouldn't either lorenzo charles_leclerc STOP FLIRTING WITH MY BROTHER! ines_alonso have you seen him?? oscarpiastri i do what i want

user34 with every comment i find out more and more about these three

user35 ines and oscar flirting with lorenzo makes so much sense though user36 i've seen enough, netflix get them their own series. forget dts

landonorris what the hell? is this a joke?

oscarpiastri my relationship is very much not a joke lando. despite what max says maxverstappen1 it was one fucking time oscar, let it fucking go. oscarpiastri no ❤️ logansargeant this is why people think max is a part of your relationship. jensonbutton he's not? oscarpiastri jenson i swear to god- user37 the world could not handle the combined powers of lestappen as a couple ❤ by charles_leclerc and maxverstappen1 ines_alonso WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU LIKING THAT SHIT? maxverstappen1 drama.

ZANDVOORT 2023

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ines_alonso they're fine, charles is just dramatic.

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charles_leclerc i am not dramatic

oscarpiastri you lost it over a pair of socks 2 weeks ago. charles_leclerc they're my favorite socks! ines_alonso they look like all your other socks?? charles_leclerc i know which ones are my favorites, thank you very much. oscarpiastri you're so weird sometimes

maxverstappen1 who the fuck did you grab lunch with? cause that sure as hell isn't me or alex??

ines_alonso i have other friends?? alex_albon that's a funny joke. never joke again. maxverstappen1 you actually don't?? ines_alonso i do. alex_albon what are you cooking baby alonso?? ines_alonso cooking up a diabolical plan to get rid of the sf-23 charles_leclerc for legal reasons this is a joke ines_alonso no it isn't

mclaren please tell charles to not tweet a hate tweet about oscar. we need a break over here.

scuderiaferrari don't worry bestie, we got him on lockdown astonmartinf1 free my boy he ain't do nothing wrong

user38 gay (affectionate)

user39 so true bestie, but this doesn't explain the way charles looks at max?? ines_alonso please don't bring it up. it's a sore subject. maxverstappen1 you're just salty because your man likes me more than you oscarpiastri i am not above throttling a dutch fucker verstappen user40 oscar piastri, i'm sorry, i was not aware of your game

user41 OSCAR PIASTRI CALLED MAX A DUTCH FUCKER??

user42 this man is so chaotic. it's always the quiet ones... user43 he's so unhinged. i love him

landonorris wait, so this wasn't a joke??

alex_albon and the award for never being able to read the room goes too... landonorris CARLOS SAID IT WAS A JOKE?? charles_leclerc do you want to see me shove my tongue down oscar's throat?? will you believe it then?? louieee carlos also said he would never cheat on isa and yet here we are?? landonorris who the fuck invited you?? louieee myself, you winless bitch fernandoalo_oficial as the children say, GAGGED HIM!!

user44 the year is 2054 and people are looking back at how f1 world champions charles leclerc and oscar piastri (it's going to happen, trust me) threatened to shove their tongues down each other's throat...

user45 OKAY!! charles threatened to shove HIS tongue down oscar's throat. not oscar. user44 same difference

MONZA 2023

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ines_alonso no one tells you how hard being a double wag is

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lilymhe just be my wag? you never have to struggle with rosso corsa and papaya ever again.

ines_alonso you're so right oscarpiastri back 🤺 off charles_leclerc i am not gods strongest soldier

user45 girl are you forgetting the aston martin of it all??

user46 aston martin daughter, red bull/williams bestie, ferrari/mclaren girlfriend. inés pick a struggle user47 i wish i had that struggle

charles_leclerc how dare you wear his number but not mine?? dishonorable!

georgerussell63 yeah inés, how could you? where is your honor? alex_albon and no mention of her father?? who won monza in 2010?? no honor! maxverstappen1 how could you do this inés?? danielricciardo people these days have no honor ines_alonso oh shut up, you people are dramatic.

patriciooward maybe you should just come to an indycar race. no struggles there.

charles_leclerc she is one comment away from dumping us. please stop patricio. oscarpiastri they only papaya she'll wear is in support of mclaren not arrow mclaren. ines_alonso it's truly a shame the indy 500 falls on the weekend of the monaco grand prix patriciooward a shame really

user48 i think inés and pato live for terrorizing charles and oscar.

user49 the only man charles and oscar seem to be insecure about is patricio o'ward. and honestly, i get it. louieee right?! where do i find a man like that?? user48 louie is the realest person in these comments honestly.

francesca.cgomes ditch the men and become my wag instead.

ines_alonso done. when do i start? oscarpiastri charles might actually get a heart attack if you keep joking about this arthur_leclerc no one ever died of a heart attack charles_leclerc are you serious right now?

user50 i live for the domestics in the comments between oscar, charles, and inés

user51 truly the highlight of my week when they do that

pierregasly i would appreciate it if you would stop flirting with my girlfriend?? she should only be giggling and kicking her feet over me.

ines_alsonso it's not my fault i'm a better flirter than you?? francesca.cgomes she just gets me charles_leclerc gonna go jump off a bridge brb (jokes) user52 had to clarify before pr got on his ass and the sainz family threw a party

user53 no one tells you how hard it is being a double wag because it's never been done before

user54 she may no longer be on the paddock as a driver but she will slay regardless user55 ones thing about inés alonso is that she will ALWAYS slay!!!

¡taglist!

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¡leclerc-s speaks!

charles leclerc is a menace, pass it on. i live for charles being a disaster in the kitchen for this fic. it's the funniest running joke in this fic. what me adding side plots for funsies??? why i would never…(i couldn’t help myself) (this also came out way later than i planned)

¡disclaimer!

this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[harunovella]

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ love language (verse v); s.g.

synopsis: it's utahime's birthday and you play spin the bottle... bonus, you're tipsy! content: canon divergence (teen!gojo era), fem!reader, hopeless romantic gojo, underage drinking, seven minutes in heaven (probs done wrong? idk), semi-first kisses, not beta read (sorry for any errors!) note: here's another one shot for my gojo anthology series! I found out it's utahime's birthday (2/18) so I managed to pull something together for this lil series (happy birthday utahime)! wanna be tagged? lmk in the replies!

"Happy birthday, Utahime!" Shoko exclaimed, wrapping an arm around the dark haired girl, clinking her beer with hers as the two chugged. There was an obvious buzz in the air, not only them, but everyone else. Mei Mei managed to get a private room where no one would question what was going on inside, seeing as some of the attendees were underage—yourself included. Your interest had always been piqued by it, this not being the first time your friends had beer around you. However, this was your first time having it... And you weren't the only one.

"Who would've thought you were a lightweight," Mei Mei piped as she nudged Gojo with her shoulder. "You never bothered to drink with us before, what's changed your mind?" Smirking at him, already knowing the answer, the older woman gazed at the white haired boy as his cheeks burned a bright pink. His eyes shifted in your direction—where you had been huddled up with the birthday girl and Ieiri. "Oh, trying to impress someone, huh?"

"Shut up," Gojo mumbled, rubbing his cheeks as his body slightly swayed. "I didn't want to be a party pooper..." Eyeing you as you laughed, Satoru felt his heart race faster than it ever had in his life. He blamed it on the alcohol. "It tastes like shit."

"Then why do you keep drinking it?" Geto asked, now settled beside his best friend. "You hate beer, the first time you tried it at Shoko's birthday was enough to stop you."

"It's because he's trying to impress little miss sweetheart over there," Mei Mei nudged her head in your direction. Suguru looked over, not surprised that he was doing this just to look cool in front of you. 

"She's not gonna care if you hate it, Satoru," Suguru nudged him. "This is her first time, too."

"That's exactly... why," Gojo hiccuped. "If she can do it, so can... I!" He nodded, lifting his bottle to take another swig. Instantly hissing at the taste, squeezing his eyes shut as he shook his head, Geto laughed beside him before patting his back. "I'm trying to find a way to enjoy this but, god it's aw—"

"Satoru!" You exclaimed, waving at him before stumbling over. Falling to your knees in front of him and smiling wide, waving your own bottle before him. "This is really good, right?" You asked, realizing he had chosen the same beer as you. 

"Y—" choking on his words, Suguru smacked his back. "Yeah! To— Totally!"

Giggling, you made your way beside him as Mei Mei crawled away to sit with the other girls. "This is so much fun... what a great party," you beamed, leaning your head on his shoulder. Gojo grew stiff, grip on the bottle tightening as his free hand clutched onto his knee. Geto sat there with a smug grin, an idea coming to mind as his focus shifted towards the empty bottles. 

"Hey, I've got an idea," he spoke up, moving onto his knees to grab an empty bottle. "Let's play spin the bottle, hmm?"

"Yes!" Utahime nodded, tugging on Shoko's sleeve and waving for Mei Mei to move over so they could form a circle. 

"That'll be fun!" You nodded after lifting your head from Gojo's shoulder, grabbing his wrist so he could join you. 

He wasn't sure if it was the liquid courage, or maybe he was hyper aware, but you were being more touchy with him. Normally, you kept things cordial, constantly smiling or laughing with him as he was the one finding ways to touch you... Now with the tables turn? His heart was basically at the pit of his stomach, slightly trembling as you sat practically thigh to thigh with him. 

"Okay, let's do truth or dare," Suguru said as he settled the bottle, "whoever it lands on has to answer. Got it?" Seeing everyone nodded, the dark haired man grinned as he eyed his best friend, who basically looked like he was disassociating from the world. 

"Let's go!" Utahime exclaimed before clapping. 

"Birthday girl has the honor," Suguru nodded as Utahime beamed before reaching over to spin the bottle. 

Everyone watched with curious eyes, and like that, one by one everyone took a turn to spin the bottle. Most answered with truth, only to earn an annoyed groan from Mei Mei saying how things need to change up. 

Spinning the bottle, Mei Mei smirked as it landed on Gojo, "truth or dare, blue eyes."

Gulping, he eyed everyone as they eagerly watched him. Sucking in a sharp breath, he sat up, "dare."

"Finally," Shoko mumbled as Utahime stifled her laughter. 

"Perfect, I dare you to play seven minutes in heaven with cutie over there," Mei Mei nudged her head in your direction. "No take me backs, get in there," she pointed at the tiny supply closet behind the two of you. Gojo looked over with hesitation as you blushed. 

"Okay!" You nodded, standing up and grabbing his hand to join you. 

He felt like he had no control over his body, following you along the way and nearly tripping over his own feet as you practically shoved him inside once opening the door. Watching as you followed inside, shutting the door behind you as you were pressed against one another, Satoru held his breath. Looking down at you with wide eyes as your own looked up at him, hooded, he felt his heart thudding against his ribcage. 

Pressing your hands against his chest, you smiled up at him. "We've got seven minutes in here..." you said. 

"You— you think they'll make us... stay that long in here?" He stuttered as you shrugged, only to shyly look away. 

"I hope so..." you admitted, nibbling on your bottom lip. 

Eyeing you and wanting nothing more than to touch you, Gojo clenched his fists at his sides before throwing his head back. His mind was racing, thoughts rushing around as he felt not only your hands on him, but your whole body. It took his entire being—and willpower—to fight the blood rushing towards a place it shouldn't be. Not in a moment like this. Even if it was meant for that. "You... Uh..."

"Hm?" You looked up at him as he lowered his focus to meet yours. 

"N— Nothing, heh..." he awkwardly looked away, lifting his hand to rub the back of his neck. 

"Satoru..." you spoke up. 

"Yeah?" He mumbled. 

"Please look at me..." you begged but he stubbornly kept his eyes on the wall beside him. "Toru..." you quietly spoke as the man shivered at the sound of his nickname. "Please..."

Feeling your hands snake their way up to his face, you gently turned his head to look at you. "I— I—"

"At a loss for words?" You tilted your head, teasing him as he blinked. "Can I kiss you?"

Feeling his heart sink as you gazed up at him with lazy eyes, Gojo took in deep breaths, "you— you want to... kiss me?" He asked, gulping. 

"I wouldn't ask if I didn't want to..." you nearly whispered, causing Satoru to shiver yet again. The feeling of your nails gently caressing his skin as you didn't bother to look away, Gojo squeezed his eyes shut. How were you being the bold one? How did you have the power to always turn him into mush? Sure, you had liquid courage, but even when you weren't tipsy you had him so easily wrapped around his finger! "Toru?"

"Yes," he nodded. 

"Yes... I can?" You asked as he nodded again. 

"Please..." he whispered, begging. He knew this wasn't the right time to get his first kiss from you (or ever) but he was so desperate and so needy. He should've said no, should've said another time. However, he was a teenage boy. He didn't entirely use common sense...

Tiptoeing as you tugged him down gently, hands moving to the back of his neck, your lips pressed against his. Feeling his heart in his throat as he gazed at your closed eyes, Gojo's shaky hands settled on your hips as he kissed you back, indulging in this (what felt like) once in a lifetime opportunity. Surely neither of you would never forget. 

"So, how was it?" Shoko asked as she sat beside you on a bench, enjoying a pair of strawberry milk boxes during your break from training. 

"How was what?" You tilted your head. 

"Your seven minutes in heaven with Satoru," she chuckled, only to earn a confused look from you. "Y'know, last night?"

"Seven minutes in heaven with Satoru?" You asked as she nodded. "I don't remember that..."

tag list: @bakananya @strangehuman101 @thirtykiwis @sillygoosegoose @mandysfanfics @pinksaiyans (some of u I sadly couldn't tag!)

[ivystoryweaver]

With You part 14

<-prev next-> || Fic Masterlist || My Masterlist

Summary: Your husband is a system and an amazing person. There's hope.

Pairings: Jake Lockley x gn!reader, Steven Grant x gn!reader, Marc Spector x gn!reader. No use of Y/N.

Word Count: 2.4k

Content: So much fluff, these babies have earned it

Warnings: NONE, you can die happy. for now. well there is always cursing so... and the tiniest mention of Marc's past, slightly suggestive. not beta'd

PREVIOUSLY, on "With You"...

"Can I ask you something?" You echoed his question. "Do you want to be Moon Knight?"

He didn't answer for a while. And that pretty much told you everything you needed to know.

3:24 a.m.

Jake unlocked the front door and found you curled up in Steven's reading chair. Frowning, he wondered what had kept you awake, hoping it wasn't him. It felt good to be worried after, but he didn't want you to wait up.

Kneeling down in front of you, he gently smiled, watching the way your lips formed the sweetest pout as you deeply breathed in and out.

"What are you doing here, cariño?" He whispered, his eyes traveling over the face he'd come to love so much.

Watching you unguarded for another indulgent moment, he decided to take you to bed. This, of course, woke you up, earning him a sleepy smile and the musical sound of his name on your lips.

"Jake," you murmured sleepily, watching as he worked his way through his nightly routine - shedding his jacket and flat cap, pulling the gloves from his fingers, and all the things that never ceased to make you tingle with desire.

"We talked about you sleeping in that chair," he playfully scolded, sliding the tie from his neck before kicking off his shoes. Easing down on the edge of the bed, he leaned down to press a kiss to your forehead.

"You're gonna be twisted up in knots, and then I'm going to have to spend the rest of the night massaging them out of you."

"Sounds good to me," you drowsily giggled. "But I didn't fall asleep on purpose."

His dark eyebrows pinched together in confusion. "Why, then? One of Steven's books bore you to sleep?"

With all the sleepy noodle-y arm strength you could muster, you bopped him on the chest. "Nothing about Steven is boring."

"I know, I know," he conceded, trapping your hands in his and kissing your knuckles. "Steven reads to you in French." Playfully rolling his eyes, he added, "Yo te puedo leer en español."

"Damn, I love it when you do that," you sighed, your eyes heavy with exhaustion.

"Go to sleep," he sweetly admonished, a smile crinkling his nose as you let out a big yawn.

"You too," you murmured, your eyes flittering closed.

By this point, you were halfway draped across his lap. He didn't really have the heart to wake you again, so he eased down, holding you close.

"You're still dressed," you mumbled into his chest.

"You prefer me undressed?" The deep rumble in his chest equally soothed and exhilarated you. You never ceased to be amazed at how the timbre of his voice differed from Steven's so much.

"Always," you teased back, trying to make your fingers cooperate with your brain so you could unbutton his white shirt.

"Too late for all that, mi vida," he admonished, even as he pushed your hands aside and removed his shirt anyway.

"Party pooper," you pouted, nuzzling against his solid, bare chest, feeling satisfied that you'd gotten your way.

After a few moments of sleepy contentedness, he asked you one more question before he let you drift off. "You weren't really waiting up for me, were you, honey?"

"No," you sighed. "I was researching. And studying."

"Okay. Can I ask what you were researching?" He hated to keep you awake, but he was curious.

"Well I was studying for my next nursing exam, but I was researching some stuff Steven's been working on."

"Are you doing Steven's homework?" He teased, nuzzling your temple as he rubbed his strong hands up and down your back.

"No, it's about Khonshu and stuff like that. To help Marc. And you."

Halting the soothing motion over your back, he inched away so he could see your face. You thought he might disagree with what you were researching, but he nodded slowly.

"Steven's been talking to me about that," he confessed. "Marc too. I...I told him I was sorry."

Completely awake now, and extremely curious, you sat up in bed. "What are you sorry for, baby? If it's okay for me to ask. You guys don't have to tell me everything you say to each other."

"I know that," he gently smiled, sitting up to join you. Reaching for your hand, he tangled his fingers with yours, the way he did the first night he met you. "You know how I didn't want to take Marc's time away from you and...I think I might have actually done that."

"Jake - "

"No, just listen," he went on, squeezing your hand to let you know it was okay. "I've been watching over Marc for a long time - way before he knew I was there. And nothing has ever made him feel as safe as he feels with you. Not even Steven."

You heart stirred at this confession - both at the protectiveness of Jake over Marc, and the realization of how you could make Marc feel safe.

"So, it's not easy for me to feel like I'm not protecting him," Jake explained, rubbing his thumb back and forth over yours. "That's why I left you alone for so long and tried to keep him in the dark about Khonshu, but...I think maybe it's worse that I did."

Nodding slowly, you waited to see if he would continue.

"Feeling out of control - it really scares him. So not knowing part of himself - me, and not knowing Khonshu was there - it hurt him." Jake sighed, grateful to have you to talk to, after so many years of having no one. "But since Marc was the one who made the deal with Khonshu originally, and because I'm a part of him - all it did was make him angry at himself. He blames himself, you know."

"Oh, I know," you agreed, leaning over to rest your head against Jake's shoulder.

"But I think it's getting better," Jake added. "We talk a lot."

"You do?" A smile brightened your sleepy countenance. "Jake, that's wonderful. He needs you. I know he does."

"Mmm," Jake agreed, his eyelids drooping. "I better sleep or they'll both kill me."

The next morning, Steven was already up and making you breakfast by the time you clambered out of bed (neck as stiff as Jake had predicted) and hit the shower. Once you were dressed, you headed into the kitchen to the same question Jake had posed the night before.

"You alright, love?" Steven asked, noticing you rubbing a sore spot on your neck. "Been sleepin' in my chair again, have we?"

"Yes, I know," you playfully grumbled. "My fault."

Reaching for your hips, Steven turned you around and pulled your back against his chest with a little more force than you were used to from him.

"Steven," you giggled as his breath warmed the skin of your neck. You shivered as he pressed an open-mouthed kiss there, nibbling just a little before nuzzling his way to your ear.

"Do you have time for a neck massage?" He murmured, running the tip of his tongue along the shell of your ear, sending a wave of chills all the way down your body.

Biting your lip, you squirmed in his embrace, knowing very well you didn't have time to fool around.

"Massage? Yes," you stuttered out, wetting your lips. Thrusting your rear end backward, you groaned at what you felt developing there. "No time for that though."

Kissing a trail down the side of your neck, Steven stopped at your collarbone, gently biting before completely releasing you from his strong arms. "Je te vois plus tard, mon cœur.," he whispered, turning you around once more and pressing a tempting kiss to your mouth.

"How am I supposed to leave after that?" You gasped, swatting Steven's arm playfully. Grasping his oversized white t-shirt, you pulled his mouth back to yours.

'On the roof -M'

The note on the countertop sent a thrill through your body, which was a nice change from sheer panic or profound worry (when it came to Marc). Looking a little closer at the note, you noticed an arrow at the bottom of it, seeming to indicate to turn the paper over.

'Change out of your scrubs.'

Biting your lip excitedly, you decided to freshen up for just a few minutes, and change into one of Marc's favorite outfits. Nothing too fancy, but something that fit you perfectly, and always caught his eye.

Blowing out a nervous breath of anticipation, you decided to use the long ride up in the old building's lift to calm down a little. You loved Steven and Jake, of course, but it was Marc who was struggling so mightily lately, and who you had spent the least time with. You were elated to see him.

Your outfit choice paid off because, upon making your way out onto the roof, you saw that Marc had set up a rooftop dinner. And not just a picnic, like you and Steven were prone to do. This was something else.

Blinking a few times, you felt as if you had become the lead character in a rom com. It almost felt a little cliche, except that this was Marc Spector. So it was nothing short of miraculous.

Your Marc had found a small, circular patio table with two chairs, procured a table cloth, brought up the dishes from your grandmother... The food was likely catered and smelled delicious. A hodgepodge of colorful candles were lit on a silver tray - a makeshift centerpiece, you assumed.

Then there was Marc. Your husband. Dressed in a simple, fitted black t-shirt and jeans, his dark jacket was draped over the back of his chair. His inky curls were neatly smoothed away from his face, the way he preferred, and even before he reached you, you could smell the rustic warmth of his aftershave.

In his hands, he held three orange flowers: tiger lilies.

"I hope this isn't too much," he disclaimered, in classic Marc fashion. His warm, chocolate eyes met yours before briefly flickering down and back up your body. The tip of his tongue dragged temptingly across his bottom lip appreciatively.

"I just...I wanted to do something for you." Reaching up to scrub his hand over the back of his neck, he shuffled forward, thrusting the vibrant flowers out as a meek offering. "Tiger lilies. You said my voice was like tiger lilies...not long after we met. I don't know if you remember - "

"I remember," you breathed, surprising even yourself as moisture gathered in the corners of your eyes. "Thank you. They're beautiful." Reaching for the flowers, your fingers brushed his and you felt a thrill that he could make you weak for him after four and a half years.

"Come on," he urged, placing his arm around your shoulders to guide you to your chair. "I hope you're hungry. If not, it's okay, we can eat later - "

"I am," you quickly assured him. As soon as he took his seat, you reached across the table for his hand, careful to avoid the gathering of candle fire. The flames showed off the handsome contours of his face - the rusty warmth of his eyes, the strength of his square jaw. The scrub of stubble that tickled when he kissed you - something you were dying to do.

"You look...really good," he complimented, squeezing your hand affectionately. "I love when you wear that."

"I know," you smiled flirtatiously. "That's why I wore it."

He eagerly nodded, relaxing at this small triumph. But unsure of what to say next - of how to begin to explain to you the feelings bursting inside of him - he defaulted to the next sensible task.

"We should eat," he decided.

You were hungry, but really - you could hold his hand and stare at him forever. Nodding in agreement, you set your three lilies down on table's edge and squeezed his hand.

From there, conversation was pretty standard - he asked about your day, your co-workers and if you thought you might advance to the next level of nursing. He asked about your family and, of course, teased you for falling asleep in Steven's chair.

"Yes, my god - you guys are three-for-three on the chair interrogation," you playfully pouted. "I'll try not to do it again."

"Jake told me why you fell asleep...and Steven told me, you know - what you've been researching."

"I just want you to be okay," you confessed, reaching for his hand again, now that dinner was done. "I don't want you to ever be harmed like that again, Marc. It scared me so bad that Khonshu let you get hurt."

"I know," he nodded, and you realized, when you saw the distant, pained look in his eyes, that it scared him too. After a brief but comfortable silence, he went on.

"Steven talked to him, you know. Talked to Khonshu."

You probably looked like one of those cartoons with gigantic eyes bugging comedically out of the character's head.

"He what?"

Marc nodded, easing out of his chair. Keeping hold of your hand, he helped you to your feet and started leading you on a nighttime stroll around the rooftop.

"One night, he suited right the hell up - like, the whole, three-piece, Psycho Colonel Sanders get-up, marched right up here, to the roof, and said he would wait all night until the 'silly old bird' showed up," Marc explained.

"I think he wanted to call him the 'bloody stupid pigeon', but realized he might get an audience if he was a little bit nicer."

"Oh my god," you laughed out, concerned, but amused by Steven's antics. "What happened?"

"He gave Khonshu hell for what happened, apparently. I didn't hear him. Jake told me later, and then I asked Steven about it. Jake said he did hear it and he was laughing his ass off."

"The shit you three get up to in the middle of the night, I swear to god," you marveled. "Did Khonshu actually answer him?"

"Yes," Marc responded, bringing your stroll to a halt. Taking both of your hands in his, he stared deeply into your eyes. "He gave Steven the 'protect the travelers of the night' speech, like a damn broken record. So Steven said he would just take things up with the Ennead if he needed to."

"He did not!" You gasped. Steven had always been forthright and could be terribly sassy when he wanted to be, but this was next-level.

"He did," Marc confirmed. Shaking his head, he pulled you into his arms. "You know, when I was a kid...I never had anyone to look out for me. Not once. Not even my dad, but now..." His jaw twitched as he fought through his emotions, "Now I have three of you."

next->

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[legendary-69420]

Chapter 10: The Turning Point (Part 1)

(Racing Hearts : VOLUME 1)

The bass thumped in the dimly lit club, a pulsing rhythm that echoed the energy of the crowd. Mark Spencer was in his element, surrounded by an array of admirers. The night was electric, and his carefree attitude drew people in. He leaned against the bar, laughter spilling from his lips, his shirt unbuttoned enough to reveal the chiseled contours of his chest and abs.  "Mark! Over here!" a voice called, and he turned to find a group of girls beckoning him over. He grinned, the adrenaline of the night surging through him as he made his way to their table.  Across the club, Charles Leclerc watched from a distance, arms crossed, irritation bubbling beneath the surface. Mark was oblivious to the attention he was drawing—too wrapped up in the thrill of the moment. The sight of Mark flirting with admirers, their hands brushing against his skin, sent a wave of jealousy coursing through Charles. "Typical rookie," he muttered to himself, shaking his head. Deep down, he knew he shouldn't care, but he couldn't shake the feeling that Mark was flaunting himself, almost daring anyone to look away. As Mark's laughter echoed over the music, Charles felt the tension rise. He wasn't just annoyed; he was frustrated. Why did Mark have to make it so easy? When Mark finally turned his gaze back to the bar, he spotted Charles and waved him over. "Come join the fun, Charles!" he shouted, a broad grin on his face, completely unfazed by the lingering glances from the crowd. "Yeah, right," Charles shot back, a sarcastic edge to his tone. "I'd rather not watch you gloat." "Oh, come on! Don't be a party pooper!" Mark teased, his carefree demeanor only adding to Charles' irritation. "I thought you liked seeing me have a good time."  Charles clenched his jaw, pushing his way through the crowd toward Mark. "I like seeing you not make a fool of yourself. You look like you're auditioning for some cheesy reality show." Mark shrugged, his grin unwavering. "At least I'm having fun! You could learn a thing or two about loosening up, Charles." Just then, one of the girls leaned in closer to Mark, whispering something in his ear that made him laugh even harder. Charles felt a flash of anger and envy spark within him. He hated the way Mark's easy charm attracted everyone around him, how he made it all look so effortless. "Seriously, you're just going to let them paw at you like that?" Charles blurted out, unable to contain his frustration any longer.  Mark turned to him, eyebrows raised, a playful smirk on his face. "What's the matter? Jealous?"  "Not in the slightest," Charles replied, crossing his arms tighter. "I just think you should know how ridiculous this looks." The laughter around Mark faltered, and he stepped back slightly, his expression shifting. "Ridiculous? I thought that's what we were here for. To let loose. Or do you prefer being the wallflower?" "Maybe I don't need to be the center of attention to enjoy myself," Charles shot back, but even he could hear the edge of jealousy creeping into his tone.  For a moment, the tension crackled between them, a volatile mix of irritation and unacknowledged feelings. Then Mark shrugged again, his bravado returning. "Fine, keep sulking. I'll just enjoy my night without you."

[cabinofimagines]

OKAY hear me out Grover introduces the concept of "Satyr Claus," a nature-inspired version of Santa Claus hehe

A/N: I have been summoned -Danny

Words: 615

Warnings: Mentions of drunk!Chiron

Satyr Claus —(Platonic!Grover xGN!Reader)

"There you are!" Grover approaches you with a big smile. "Been looking for you..."

"What's up?" You take a break from training and sit near the dummies making some room for Grover to sit with you.

"Thalia said you were looking to create some new traditions," he sits and pulls his satchel forward. "I've got an idea..."

"Oh, yeah but it was just for the Grace siblings..." your voice dies down when you see Grover pull out a whole notebook and a pen. He really has prepared a whole list for you.

"Okay, so I've been thinking," he starts excitedly. "Some of the traditions that humans have right now surrounding Christmas are so dangerous to the environment, I mean, the wasted food, the extra use of electricity, paper—don't even get me started on pine trees!"

"I won't," you mutter, supporting your chin on one hand. "So what do you have in mind?"

"Behold!" He turns a page and shows you a very well-made sketch, probably drawn by Annabeth. "Satyr Claus!"

You take a look at it and reply matter-of-factly. "That's Krampus."

Grover frowns. "No, it's not. 'Cause Satyr Claus isn't a bad guy."

"Okay, but they definitely look like Krampus."

"No, they don't!" He grabs the notebook and points at different parts of the drawing. "The horns are smaller, there is no ugly cape in sight, no whip, and this guy smells like pine tree!"

"Well, Krampus could smell that way too, you don't know that," you tease him.

"Y/N," he scowls. "I'm trying to do something good here, raise awareness so people stop being so careless about the waste."

You feel a little guilty now, so you grab the notebook again and change your tone to one of real interest.

"But what is the appeal here? I mean, is he going to give out presents if we look after the earth, or candy?"

"Haven't thought that far ahead, that's why I came to you," he pouts.

You're flattered that he's seeing you as an expert, but you sigh. "Honestly I'm completely blank here. You should ask Klaus, bet he's got thousands of lore that people have long forgotten about him."

"For the last time, I'm not Santa!" The boy jumps out of the tree in front of you fuming.

"Oh, there you are!" You smile. "What were you doing there? Is that a secret portal that takes you to the North Pole?"

He shows you the object in his hand and scowls. "I was hanging mistletoe."

Grover squints to try and spot the plant. "You're not actually going to let it sit there for too long, right? Mistletoe is bad for the trees."

"I know that," Klaus huffs, dusting off his jeans. "And no, I'm taking it down after Christmas, since y'all decided to be party poopers this year..."

"Hey, don't get frisky, Santa," you tease him. "Are you still upset about the trivia night?"

Klaus's eyes cloud with resentment. "That was a mean use of my skills and you know it."

Grover is still focused on the mistletoe, staring at it with his mouth slightly open. "Klaus, I don't think anyone's gonna be able to see that, you placed it too high."

"Then you fix it, Satyr Claus," the boy glares at him, his ears turning red with annoyance. "I need a drink..."

"We ran out of eggnog the other night," you inform him as he walks past you. "After Chiron got overexcited, drank his whole cabinet of special drinks, and started to give us his own version of drunk history."

"Dang it!" Klaus kicks a few dry leaves that fell when he jumped off the tree. "I hate it here."

[grandaddy-of-all-liars]

for the reader folks, a one shot inspired by the fantastic art of none other than @snailgam, dedicated to @snailgam & @rensnumberonefan for well, you guys know ❤️

(CW: some expletives/harsh language only)

🚧 🚧 🚧 🚧 🚧

" 'B'! Bleeker Ave!"

"You can't do that, you used eet for thee 'A' already."

"Nuh-Uh, that's a different word, 'Avenue', so it's not cheating! Your turn."

"Aghhh ... fine, whatayver, I don't care."

"Come on now, your turn!"

" 'C'. Closer. Ya happy? Go."

"Wait a minute, where's 'Closer'?"

"Een thee mirr- eet's etched een the side mirror, okay!?"

"Nowww that's cheating, it's on the car!"

"Eet's outside, OUTSIDE THEE CAR. And you want to double-use words!?"

"That's different, though!"

"Give me thee strength ... makeeng up your own damn rules ... "

"I don't SEEEE a 'C'! Try again!"

"Okay, 'C' for thee Crap I'm goeeng to beat of your, 'C', Carcass, later!"

"Jeez, what a spoil sport."

"THERE! Kowalski EleCtreeC, 'C'! Now you go twice!"

"Wh- how come?"

"Because there's an 'E' too, you EEEmbecile!"

"Now now, you know that's cheating. Same word."

"Just play by your dadgom saylf and geeve us a rest, ah?"

"You're such a party pooper. Play wittthhh meee ... I bet we get to 'Z!' "

"We already deed twice! Now lay off, I need to theenk."

"Okay, on to 'D' it is ... "

"I'll geeve ya a 'D', pain een my ass ... "

"What Ren?"

"Huh what nothing. I deed'nt say a theeng."

A Frank Comstock & His Orchestra cassette spooled along, ticking at every rotation. Everything in this car was at least slightly well-loved. Okay, so there were in fact worse things he could conjur up than being stuck on the road with Stimpy for, what, thirty-seven minutes now? Bearing in mind, this was supposed to be a two-stop, forty-five minute errand, tops. At least they had snuck in a fast lunch of eggs and refried beans and almost too-stale-to-eat toast before flying out of their apartment. But for what? To sit on the crosstown overpass for half an hour? Because Stimpy just had to insist on coming along for the ride, and just had to insist Ren take the bridge so he could look down at the sailboats in the bay and wave at the cranky gulls on what should have been a smooth jog across the waterway. And, as Ren had decided, the universe of course hated him especially. Just for him, it had plotted the lifting of the bridge gate for a marvelously timed passing barge, as well as the lout who had started turning just as traffic halted and was now delightfully stalled out across both narrow lanes. What a freaking terrific plan, Ren callously applauded. He sunk deeper into the bucket seat, pressing his angry hide against the blazing black backrest. Oh how he now lamented having not fixed the air conditioner. But it wasn't his fault. How was he to know he'd get stranded on sun-baked tarmac hovering over the glaring brown waterway's blindingly reflective waves microwaving fire air back into his little sedan? Why him, why always him?

Stimpy seemed content with the windows down, angling about to look for all the letters in the alphabet. Again. Ignoring that their car and everyone adjacent had maybe traveled four feet in the last half hour. Ignoring that the big box truck offering a canopy of shade had of course been held back by a pushy little shit in a compact that just had to get one vehicle ahead, forcing them into raw sun without any shielding reprieve. At least Stimpy was seemingly spared of the cosmic torture doled out just for Ren. If only he'd taken the tunnel. If only they skipped their meal. If only the budget for his department wasn't axed two-thirds through the fiscal year to offset a horrible company investment that had fallen through. If only he wasn't relegated to treating their few precious possessions as collateral until he got a new job. If only he'd never woken up this morning. Why did he ever bother waking up at all anymore? He leaned forward, pressing weary brow hard into the steering wheel, pressing sweat-soaked hat rim up against his ears. He closed his eyes too tight, so tight they hurt, so tight he swore he could see solar flares vacuuming his body inward to a flaming abyss.

"Ren?"

Stimpy sounded worried.

"It's gonna be ok."

"Steempy, I don't even know eef we're gonna have enough gas to get home at thees point. Maybe thees ees a sign."

"How's that?"

"Maybe we're not supposed to make eet today. Maybe there's another way."

"What way is that then?"

"I don't freaking know, ok? What's weeth all the questions weeth you always! How about an answer for once in your brainless life!? Do you not get thee sheer pressure to be me all de time!?"

Ren motioned toward the glove box. Stimpy reminded him he'd smoked the last cigarette in that box about twenty minutes ago. Ren rubbed rigid hand over his scowl, pulling his eye sockets tight as palm dragged across his weathered face. As last resort, he pawed beneath his seat, knuckling greasy crumbs and loose change and straw wrappers until he heard that sweet telltale cellophane crinkle.

"C'mon C'mon C'mon, for Daddy ... "

Two white tips rolled in the corner of the carton.

"Sweet baby Bee-ayzul-bub!"

Maybe not every stellar installment fixed above loathed his existence. He lit up and savored the distraction from their predicament.

"So how much ya think we're gonna get for this stuff?" Stimpy quizzed, shaking a small dirty envelope.

"I told you to stop asking me questions, for fuck's sake. And poot that down, you'll drop sometheeng."

Stimpy returned it to the console compartment dejectedly.

"Hey. Don't be so moody, I'll buy ya a new one some day, huh?" Ren quipped.

"I know you will, it's not that."

"Well what then?"

"Do you really care, Ren?"

"WHAT DEED YOU JUST SAY?" he ripped the cigarette from his lips and held it out the open window, panting hot nicotine breath through his mouth into the cabin.

Stimpy flinched only marginally, turning his unperturbed frown to look Ren dead in the eyes.

"I asked if you really cared. About me."

"What's your goddamn problem!? You gonna start weeth me now?!"

Stimpy huffed through his nose, "It's a simple question, Ren."

"You got sooome nerve, ya know that, and for what!? Where do you get off ... you theenk I'm haveeng thee time of my life right now? Stuck weeth all these bastards in thees stewpid old jalopy weeth you? No job, no plan, selleeng our sheet for a few bucks? And you have the fuckeeng right!?"

Stimpy finally relented and peered back out his window, tracing his finger along the door paneling. Ren threw his elbow into his seat and pushed his hat down low over his eyes. He pulled the last drag off his smoke in one long slow suck and flicked the filter toward the murky waters below. He expended his smoky exhale purposefully in Stimpy's direction, sending tiny faint ribbons whirling around his kitty ears and nose. Stimpy didn't react. Only continued to stare blankly at a sky that was neither cloudy nor blue. Just an undefined, opaque hot white. Ren's shoulders relaxed down his back. He sneered at the envelope. Might as well take one final inventory while they were stuck motionless, suspended. Nowhere important. He needed a derision from Stimpy's attitude regardless.

Lip peeled and folded back, Ren beheld the contents of the meager package. A few gold fillings that supposedly came from his grandfather's muzzle. His silver Communion bracelet. A 14kt hoop he'd been lucky to find on the boardwalk earlier that summer. A couple old coins of questionable value. His platinum chain with saint medallion his mother had gotten for him as a pup. And then their wedding rings. An odd collection of somewhat precious items spanning his entire lifetime, reduced to the contents of one battered envelope. Their destiny now felt cheap, hollow, meaningless. He would exchange these relics for a few nondescript bucks and their individual meanings would be forever lost on civilization. He examined each of the personal items more carefully. The St. Michael medallion on delicate chain that had adorned his neck throughout gradeschool, a special gift his mother gave him as a symbol of protection from the world she had just yanked him into. The words 'Protección y Devoción' along with his initials etched into its back. The bracelet his aunt gave him, which had not fit around even his weak little wrist for years, not that he'd worn it more than a few weeks after he recieved Communion. Or to gatherings for which his mother reminded him his aunt would be in attendance. He found it difficult to believe he'd somehow been even smaller than he was today. And finally, the only adult jewelry he'd ever worn until last night, the two artifacts of their union tied together with a snip of fishing line. Disbelief gnawed over him. How he'd picked these out with such pride and candor, such deliberation when he finally accepted his life would have and never would again be as full as it was without Stimpy in it. Perhaps the only time in his life he'd felt so ecstatic and terrified at once, assured Stimpy would agree to become his for good, yet, simultaneously gripped with the threat of rejection that had cast its plague over every other step in his journey. How such a small earthly metal object could carry with it such incredible power and history. Memories filled his senses, the smell of the store where he'd purchased the rings, the carefully planned but ultimately scrapped proposal in favor of a more organic approach, Stimpy's lovely green eyes looking at him and nothing and no one else in that gorgeous moment just before and just after he said his "Yes", no wait, how he'd told Ren nothing would make him happier and if only Ren knew how much his heart had wished for this, the weekend of bliss that followed their engagement, right up to their municipality wedding set between small claims and traffic court, Stimpy dressed to the nines on the courthouse steps beaming after the judge had announced them officially documented family. It wasn't painful last night, when he was mixed up in the mania of instant gratification and fast-cash scheming. But now, cradling the rings in his fingers, feeling their figurative and literal weight in his grip, a sadness crept through his spine.

"I know it doesn't mean we're not together, ya know. I'm not that dumb, Ren."

Stimpy had caught him poring over their marital bands.

"I know you know that," rolled Ren's eyes with some poorly hidden embarrassment.

What Stimpy didn't know, or maybe he did by now, was how petty and careless Ren could be about pretty careful things. Stimpy knew Ren had collected these items to take the the dank and derelict pawn shop they'd visited with curbside finds many times before. Stimpy knew the sedan needed a new alternator and battery. Stimpy knew this was yet another lean yet temporary period in their timeline, bookended by Ren's gainful employment and his supplemental stints as seamstress, cook, or courier to make ends meet until their refrigerator and wallets could fatten up. What Stimpy didn't know was that Ren planned to ignore their car's mechanical needs, and was actually going to march those dollars right into the seedy betting parlor next door while Stimpy remained transfixed on shelves of abandoned memories in the pawn shop. Stimpy didn't know any of that as he looked over at Ren from across the cabin, understanding and love in his eyes overtaking his gloomy countenance. Ren felt rotten to the core, wondered if Stimpy could see the slime leaking from his orifices or smell the decay emanating from his soul. He was reminded why, as he clutched the rings, why he had been so apprehensive to ask Stimpy to be his, in the first place. Stimpy was pure. Stimpy was whole. Dumb as paint, but the truest he would ever meet and have the privilege to be loved by. Ren always contended he himself was deep down no good, nowhere near decent enough, and it was only a matter of time before the cat figured that out for himself. But no matter how many times Ren spoonfed him the sour fodder that was his true self, Stimpy never balked. Only wrapped his arms and tenderness more tightly around the broken dog, mending his heart with unconditional uninhibited adoration. It was beyond anything Ren could convince himself he deserved. Ren's eyes lowered to his knees as he sank back in his seat, envelope of trinkets tinkling in his lap.

The still moment was broken by some distant hollers and honks, which dominoed toward their little red car stuck on the bridge. It must have started up ahead at the stalled vehicle, one irate commuter finally snapping the herd into heated frenzy, concentrated frustration no longer containable for the hoarde of lives delayed by a singular disruptive variable blocking natural order. Reframed in Ren's mind at least, had this traffic dalliance not thwarted his path, he would at this very moment very likely be in no better financial shape. A betting voucher wealthier maybe, but spiritually poorer for certain. Horns blared around them, for no purpose other than for motorists to vent their disgust. The noisy exchange layered rage on rage fruitlessly in the concrete and iron colony. Ren threw back his head and rubbed his face with both hands, then returned all shiny treasures to envelope with a defeated chuckle.

"Too bad we can't turn around now, huh?" he shook his ears.

"Ren."

"Yeah."

"Ren, we ... I don't think we can go back."

"I know that, I just said eet."

"I mean ... Ren ..."

"You're een some kinda mood today."

Just then flashing DOT lights beaconing from the front of the jam caught Ren's glance, the heroes of disabled vehicles had arrived!

"Yeah now wee're talkeen!"

"Ren, you're going to be a dad," blurted his passenger.

The heart can only beat so hard and so fast. As long as it's attached to its host. In Ren's case, it fell through his ass past the leather and steel and machinery and asphalt and rebar, plopping heavily into the brown water and sunk straight to the planet's center. He froze. He repressed urges to vomit and cry and scream. Stimpy panted as quietly as he could, he himself looked ill for having just dropped such a revelation. Ren tried to make some sounds with his parched mouth but tongue and vocal chords were petrified in place. Stimpy's ears lowered and nose dropped. He couldn't quite gage Ren's reaction or his own for that matter.

Ren could only emit a confused whining sigh, inflected for confirmation. Stimpy gave a single assuring nod. Their mouths hung open. Time meant nothing. The chorus of horns and yells ceased for them alone. Nothing else mattered.

"Like right, right now?" Ren finally squeaked, grabbing at his own gut, pointing to Stimpy's belly with his eyes.

"Uh huh," Stimpy delicately placed his gloved paw over his own tummy, which looked very much the way it always had, though it was very much not the way it always had been.

Ren had forgotten to breathe until his lungs autonomously forced a choke of fresh oxygen back into his body. The exhale pinkened his sclera and flared his nostrils and yielded the ugliest sob from his rattling chest. Fat hot teardrops rolled from his eyes. His nose leaked down his upper lip. His hands grabbed at the air aimlessly. The weight of a strange and fraught lifetime pressed upon his temples, rendering him absolutely bewildered in body and mind.

"So, you're really upset, huh Ren? I'll understand if you'll wanna move on and-"

"HUH?" Ren's bloodshot eyes shot upward.

"Well it's just that, I know this is a lot to put on you and all, I just, I wasn't ready to say goodbye is all," Stimpy whispered holding back his own tears.

"Jesus Christ, ees that really what you theenk of me?!" Ren wailed unabashedly, his voice breaking between gags.

Maybe Stimpy really had sized him up for who he was, afterall. Maybe Stimpy had always known. But the notion that Stimpy did not see his own worth beyond convenience broke something in Ren he didn't know was there. It pierced Ren. He clutched his chest, feeling as if applying pressure was the only thing that would stave off implosion.

"Well you're crying Ren!"

"So are you!"

Gates finally broken, Stimpy began sobbing freely, flooding the passenger seat.

"You're sure?" Ren's hands wrung.

"Uh-huh. I went to the doctor three days ago. You're, uh, you're gonna get a bill. I'm sorry, Ren."

"NO!"

Ren ripped off his seatbelt and climbed over the middle console, wriggling himself between Stimpy's thighs on his knees.

"Whoa hey hey! Get a room!" shouted the car beside them.

"Mind your own business pal, thees is an emergency!" Ren returned, trying not to scream into Stimpy's face as he cupped it in his palms.

Ren ran his hands down Stimpy's cheeks, wiping his tears away. He coasted them down Stimpy's shoulders to his breast and over the sweet little pudge of his belly, caressing it gingerly as if the most exquisite treasure in the world. He pressed his forehead against Stimpy's and continued crying until he'd wept himself dry.

"Steempy, I've nayver, I've nayver wanted anybodies as badly as I want you right now, een every way."

"So you're happy?"

"I don't theenk there's words, Steempy baby."

It was so infrequent Ren called him that. Stimpy swooned. If ever he so desperately needed Ren to reveal his affectionate side, it was right here and now. They embraced and held each other tight, not wanting the moment to end.

"Steempson?"

"Yes?"

"I loave you. I've ... always loaved you."

Ren picked up the envelope and pulled out the rings, freeing them from the cordage. He put his band back on, then took Stimpy's hand to replace the ring to its rightful home.

"Are you sure, Ren?"

"Everytheeng's deefferent now, Steempson."

A horn blared behind them. They'd not noticed traffic had begun breaking up, the disabled car was now off to the side, and vehicles began pressing forward to bottleneck past the obstruction.

"Let's go scumbag!" someone yelled.

"Eat my deeck!" Ren screeched back at no one in particular, stretching back over to the driver's seat.

The car lurched forward, in line for a one-lane merge ahead.

"Take thees," Ren gestured, holding out the St. Michael medallion to Stimpy.

"What's that for?"

"To keep you and the baby safe," Ren pronounced.

"But you don't follow all that religious stuff?"

"It's seemboleec. Plus, eet's thee one thing I can pass on, ya know, besides my dasheeng good looks."

As they inched past the stalled vehicle now pulled over, Ren leaned out his window and addressed the driver who was sitting against the guardrail.

"Thanks a meellion, buddy, I owe ya one!"

"Hey fuck you asshole!" retorted the distressed mororist.

"I mean it! Fuck you vayry much too!" Ren laughed, speeding free of the auto tangle at last.

The gold teeth and bracelet and coins didn't fetch much, just enough to minimally feed the gas tank for job-searching the next day and procure for Stimpy a great big porgie from the fish market as a celebratory dinner. Ren even purchased some dill and lemons and garlic and herbed butter to fashion a savory sauce for the panfried delicacy he served Stimpy that evening. He waited on Stimpy hand-and-foot, brimming with a newfound exhilaration he wished he could bottle and dose every day for the rest of his life. Stimpy was not one to shirk his contributions to the home, and helped Ren scrub the pans and dry the plates after they'd picked every bit of meat from the fishbones together. They spent the evening talking of cribs and formula and parenting styles and potential colleges and bibs and names that would suit either a girl or boy manx-chihuahua hybrid. They were inseparable through the wee hours, cuddled close in bed, staring through their ceiling together upward to the stars above, excitedly imagining and planning every milestone ahead.

"Are you scared too?" Ren would nudge ever so often.

"Not as long as you're here," Stimpy would reassure.

"Let's play ag-ayn."

"Okay Renny. 'A', for ... Alton or Alina."

"Hmmm, Alina Höek, ok, that could grow on me. Now 'B', 'B' for Balthazar or Belsita?"

"Always with the classical names huh?" Stimpy teased. "Ya know they might call him Balls for short, or ta' tease 'em, you know how kids are."

"Don't I though! Ah, when you're right, you're right."

This continued on until it was Ren's turn to pick 'R' names.

"Dont even suggest that, I don't like eet!"

"Oh come now, if he's a he and you're his daddy, he'll be Ren Junior!"

"Keed's gotta have hees own indenteety. We can geeve him my meeddle name, but that's eet."

"You're gonna be such a good father, ya know that, Renny?"

Ren buried his face into Stimpy's belly, hiding his big idiot grin from view of his beloved moron. He sure hoped Stimpy was right. He pressed ear to abdomen, hearing the sounds of dinner but pretending he heard the teensiest little heartbeat behind the digestion. So much of his identity, within the last twelve hours, was now primed on slashing fear from his quintessence and burning bravery into its place. Even if it took some pretending to achieve mastery, something had ignited in him today. Perhaps the flirtation of chance with destiny had reformed him. He would do everything he could to be the better version of himself from here on, no matter how hard he had to fight his demons. With his cheek snug against Stimpy's belly, he talked to the little life inside telepathically, convincing it that it was in good hands so long as Ren Höek walked this world. He would bet every last material good he owned that the baby answered him back, forging a lifelong connection. He was finally holding on to letting go. He felt like the baby was already in his arms, looking up at him as the great protector he knew himself to be. It was bliss. Pure unequivocal bliss.

"I can't wait to meet you, Reecardo."

"I like that, Ren. I like that a lot."

[kittyball23]

Out of the Zone (a Trolls fanfic)

Summary: A glimpse of BroZone’s final moments together

__________________________________________

"Why are you acting like this?" The question came out in a combination of frustration and exasperation, the teal Trolling in sunglasses who had uttered it flinging his arms out at his brothers. To him, they were being entirely unreasonable out of nowhere. To the others, this was not the case. "Because I'm tired of it, JD!" Spruce exclaimed. "You're always mentioning that you're the leader - " "Uh, that's because I am," John Dory cut in. He shut his mouth when Spruce held up a finger. "SHH! I'm not finished," the purple Trolling said harshly. "Like I said, you're always mentioning that you're the leader. Well, you know what? A 'leader' listens. A 'leader' lets the group make decisions to-ge-ther." He enunciated each syllable of the last word. "You're just one Troll, and you're not the boss of everything!" "Yeah?" JD said, getting annoyed. "Well, someone has to be the boss. Somebody's gotta remind you guys why we're in this band. Somebody's gotta show you the ropes!" "Yeah, well, if ya ask me, you're showing us more of your uptightropes," Clay said, snickering at his own joke and nudging Spruce so that he could laugh along with him. The purple Trolling did not find the joke funny, however, and whirled on the yellow Trolling. "You pick the worst times to joke about stuff, you know?" he grumbled. "Can't you take something serious for once?" Clay frowned, not appreciating his dismissal. "Wow, okay. As if you're Mr. Perfect. The guy who's more concerned about what girl's heart he's gonna break next!" Spruce glared at him. "No, I'm the guy who's more concerned about what the future of our band is. Maybe if you're not so busy with your silly pranks and actually got your head in the game, you'd see that!" Clay shook his head and crossed his arms, not liking how his usually chill brother was behaving. "Like you haven't laughed at some of them," he muttered, making note to get back at Spruce with one of his so-called 'silly pranks.' Unable to help himself, Floyd spoke up. "Well, some of them aren't really that funny. I hated that time you did what you did with my eyeliner." The magenta Troll shuddered to even recollect the horrible, bright neon green that had been on his eyelids. Clay rolled his eyes. "Whatever! It was funny to me. And as long as it's funny to someone is what counts." JD ignored the little scuffle between the Trollings, wanting to get clarification. "Why is it that you're backing out of the dream, bro?" "Dude, he never said that," Floyd piped up, trying to show support. It wasn't met positively however. "I can answer my own questions, thanks," Spruce said, a little annoyed at his brother's interference. "I'm just trying to help," Floyd said. "Well it's best you don't," Spruce snapped.

Floyd frowned. "This involves me just as much as you guys. I write a lot of the songs here, in case you forgot! Like you always like to forget about me," he said spitefully and crossing his arms. "Just because you're older doesn't mean you can think that you're better!"

"We don't think we're better," Clay said, "we know we're better!" Not at all meaning it, he laughed, hoping Floyd would laugh at this joke too, but the magenta Trolling shot him a dirty look. Clay rolled his eyes. When did his brothers become such party-poopers?

"Cry me a river, Floyd! You seem to be real good at that, too!" JD snapped, annoyed. "And if you're talking about that one song you showed me the other day, I already told ya we can't do it. Not all of us have that vocal range!"

"You mean you don't have that vocal range," Floyd muttered, knowing very well that he could hit the required notes, and knowing that JD likely didn’t want to feel like he was being upstaged.

"What does it matter if we're all singing songs and everyone likes them, anyway?" JD challenged. "As long as my band is popular, why does it really matter?" Spruce gawked at him. "YOUR band, huh?" The purple Trolling shook his head. "I knew it." "I mean our band, ours!" JD quickly tried to correct himself. "OURS. Geez, Spruce, I thought Floyd was the sensitive one here!"

"It has nothing to do with being sensitive," Spruce said. "It has to with the fact that I feel like I can't trust you anymore, JD!" he blurted before he could help himself. He instantly regretted it, however, noting how crushed the aquamarine Trolling looked as a result of his words. It felt like a harsh thing to say. But, the more he thought about it, the more the regret began to dwindle away. This really was the way that Spruce felt, and seeing that Clay and Floyd were not quick to jump in and protest, he knew that they likely felt the same way, too.

"Actions speak louder than words do, JD," Spruce said. "And so far, you've been doing a lot of talk and not coming through with any of the promises you've said."

JD swallowed, thinking hard. Had he... had he really been as blind to his brothers as Spruce was making it seem?

NO! His conscience nearly screamed at him. You're doing what is best for the band. And if Spruce, and Clay, and Floyd can't see that, well, then... then...

JD's face hardened. "All right then. Problem solved." He clapped his hands together once and plastered an insincere smile on his face. "I'm going to be removing myself from the equation, then. I say it's about time the world gets introduced to John Dory, the solo artist, anyhow, without anyone else holding me back. Don't you think?"

A part of Spruce wanted to stop his brother's train of thought. He did not like where the situation was heading, but at the same time the purple Trolling was angry. It wasn't an emotion he usually felt, his demeanor usually that of good vibes, but even he had his limits. This was one of those times that it couldn't be helped. He really had had enough of JD's controlling ways. And right now, he wasn't about to move over to stop his brother – his closest brother in bond amongst the bunch, admittedly – from walking out the door that he was making his way towards. "Agreed," he simply said. He knew the anger he felt would go away eventually. He wasn't the kind to hold much of a grudge, and perhaps one day he might even be happy to see JD again. But he also knew that it would likely not be for a long, long time.

JD glared at Spruce, his hard gaze drifting over to Clay and Floyd, too. He shook his head, that small part of him not really wanting to leave. But they had a lesson to learn. "Who knows," he said, his anger getting the best of him. "Maybe I'll even find better brothers than you guys."

"So you can treat them the same way you've been treating us?" Spruce asked, but JD didn't hear. The aquamarine Troll was already gone, sunglasses, teal vest and all.

A silence hung in the air for a moment.

Then, Floyd spoke.

"Guys, we can still make this work out," he said, hopefully, peering at his brothers. "Look, we can maybe be a quartet until JD decides to come back, and then we can be BroZone again, right?"

Clay scoffed. "And I thought I was the funny one," he muttered, starting to walk off.

"Yeah, who put you in charge now?" Spruce said, frowning at the magenta Trolling.

"I'm not trying to be in charge," Floyd said defensively. "I just don't want things to end like this for us." He sighed and rubbed an arm, unable to look his brother in the eyes.

Something flashed across Spruce's face. Perhaps regret? Floyd couldn't be sure, as it was gone the very next second and the purple Trolling frowned. "Cut the sap, Floyd. Can't you see it's over? Save your breath for your solo career."

With that, Spruce rolled his eyes and waved a dismissive hand at them as he walked off, muttering something under his breath about needing a vacation as he too walked out the door. Left alone in the silent pod were only Floyd and Branch now.

Branch had so far been a silent witness to everything, standing to the side and hovering by the magenta Trolling's legs. The baby stared wide-eyed after Clay and Spruce, not quite understanding things completely but knowing something was very, very wrong. Why were his brothers leaving? Why weren't they singing and dancing and hugging like they all usually did? Distress starting to prick at him, Branch peered up at Floyd, confiding in the magenta Trolling for some kind of answer.

Floyd stared down pitifully at his baby brother for a long moment and then sighed. "Branch," he began, trying to sound as gentle as he possibly could. "We're... out of sync."

Branch cocked his head, as if to say "Huh?"

Floyd nodded slowly. "You see, we've gone from boys to men, and now there's only one direction for us to go." He gestured out the front door. "The backstreets."

Branch blinked at him. What was Floyd talking about? Branch knew Floyd was poetic, but he wished that his brother wasn't talking in these confusing riddles right now.

Floyd seemed to get this vibe off of the little one and he kneeled down, putting a hand on his small blue shoulder. "It's time for us all to move on, Branch."

Branch whimpered at this, and Floyd patted him on the back. "I know it sounds a little scary. But it's really not. We all have to move on sometime. You'll understand someday." With that he stood up and began to make his way over to the door. But suddenly, he paused. The magenta Trolling then whirled around and knelt at Branch again, scooping the baby into a tight hug. Branch liked hugs from his brothers, but this one was a different kind of hug. He didn't know what exactly it was that made it different, but Floyd did, and it was tearing the magenta Trolling's heart apart. This was a goodbye hug.

"I'm going to miss you," Floyd whispered, his voice on the verge of breaking and the familiar sting of tears starting to pool in his eyes. "Please don't forget me." He held on a moment longer, his grip tightening slightly before it finally went slack and he released the baby. Then he shuffled off and began to move to the door. Branch began to toddle after him, but Floyd put a hand up and shook his head. "No, Branch. You have to stay. Someone has to be the man of the house." He forced a chuckle, but wasn't really feeling all that into it. "Take care of Grandma for us, okay?"

Branch glanced worriedly up at his brother, but did not put force any resistance. He stepped back, watching as Floyd shot him one last sad smile and then turned to leave.

It was only after he'd made sure that the pod was far behind him that Floyd allowed his tears to fall.

__________________________________________

A/N: I think there were multiple factors at play when it came to BroZone’s disbanding. This is just my wild guess 🤷

[blissfulalchemist]

9, 12, 17, and 18 for the halloween asks!

Thank you Liz! I hope the answers satisfy!

9. Which OC goes all out with Halloween decorations?

Would it be cheating to say that if Sib's mother knew about all Saint's Wake she'd go all out? Yes? Okay fine. But real answer is a bit of a tie between Cat and Tia. It was always honestly a fun time for Cat especially once getting her own place before the horrors of Hope County. Tia has a smaller space but she did switch out some decorations in her van to be Halloween themed and you're damn right that she went and decorated Khaki's office because he was being a bit of a bore :/.

12. If you could dress up as one of your OCs for Halloween, who would it be?

God if I had the body for it I would dress as Sib because she gets such a princess look at times and how can I not want that?! I would also pick Sahar's hero outfit because uh have you seen it? It's badass!

17. Which OC is easy to scare?

Cat and Thea are the easiest. Rip to Anthea especially since they are surrounded by tricksters. At least Emet won't do anything during the holiday.

18. Do any of your OCs dislike Halloween and why?

Stasia because she can overall be a party pooper and its frivolous and frankly in her og verse kind of overlooks the way it minimizes the fact that witches like her were once hunted and hung so you know pretty valid. Chance doesn't hate it but it can get on his nerves the amount of people that try to convince him that the supernatural is real, just leave him be, he's just trying to get ready for his annual hunt big foot adventure.

[m-jelly]

Hello Jelly 🛷

First & foremost, thank you for your amazing series "Sinful Confessions", a real bliss to read (I had no time enough to comment it all yet, though... Sorry 😞)

For your winter event, how about canon Hange married with Survey Corps soldier preparing together a (sweet) secret birthday for their best friend Levi (he is not part of the story, of course).

I think they would find all the little attentions to make this day comfortable, happy & memorable for him, according to their kindness & understanding of Levi's tastes & state of mind 😊

Hope this is not too detailed 🙏

Thank you 💖

For a friend

Pairing: GN!Hange x GN!Reader

Genre and tags: Fluff, romance, married couple, sweet moment, canon world.

Concept: You and Hange prepare some gifts for your dear friend Levi for his birthday.

Link to event

You put together a simple box as Hange hummed under their breath. You picked up some tissue paper and filled out the box. You glanced up at your partner and smiled at them. You felt your heart flutter as they smiled back at you.

You picked up a tea set and checked it over. "Hange?"

"Mm?"

You glanced back at your partner. "Do you think Levi will like this?" You fiddled with the pot. "I want him to be happy. I know he hates his birthday."

Hange smiled softly. "Levi will love it all. He's our dear friend and he has covered for us. He was at our wedding. He's our supporter. We know him and we know what he likes."

You nodded and placed the seat set into the box. "You're right. I guess I just worry about him."

"I do too."

You put more tissues you and closed up the box after. You wrapped it up and tied a bow on the top. "Remember, no big party."

Hange sighed. I know, I know, he's a party pooper."

You smiled softly. "He just likes peace and quiet." You moved on to the next present. "I think my idea is the best."

Hange stopped. "I think so too."

You stood up and sighed. "Let's fix this room up more for him."

Hange looked around the room to see it was spotless from your cleaning, you had reached Levi's standards. By the big window was a bath ready to be filled with all kinds of nice products. There was a table and chair to the side covered in a tea-tasting collection. The last parts were a comfy chair with some nice books along with a nice bed with drawings of his mother and lost friends on the bedside table.

You organised the tea table and arranged everything perfectly. "I've arranged the tea for him in order of what he should try."

Hange walked over and looked. "Great order."

You sat down and started writing information on little cards. "There, now he knows that each thing is and what is blended into them."

Hange hugged you from behind. "You're truly wonderful. You care so much about others and it's one of the reasons why I love you so much."

You turned your head and kissed Hange. "I love you too."

"Come on, let's go get the grumpy birthday boy."

[struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor]

Fans actually didn't know what it was exactly if it was track video or was a MV cause the label wasn't clear about anything at all. no one had any idea till the tim of release. fans thought like usual the album would have a MV for pre-release and title song. so it's basically label's fault. All i know is he's singing live in the video that's why it's not called a MV. The label really under promoted the song. Gave itunes preorder presave just a day before when the songs released in 2024 itself from other members had it days before. And they even did it because fans were constantly tagging them for past week so they did it a day before. Idk man what's the problem this company has with jm, that the Geffen ppl even disrespecting him in broad daylight. The official accounts from Geffen didn't promote it at all. There's nothing posted on tiktok at all. Even tae's new project is posted there but jm's pre release. The only good thing was that Instagram group chat and all that's it.

As for song then I'll say it's growing on me per each listen. The more i listen the more I'm loving it. It's a fun and joyful song and I'm really enjoying it. I love that with jm he's totally unexpected like u don't know what type of song he will release. Although many always expect dark theme songs from him but he tries different things with his music and i like that about him.

I know, but most fans suspected it was a track video, right? (due to the lack of promo, even by Hybe and Jimin standards). It's being treated as an MV by the fans, because it's all we have, but it's kind of live and pretty simple (no set or outfit changes). I don't think it was meant to be an MV. By that reasoning, any track, performance or visualization video could be called an MV. It wasn't intended to be one imo, and I think that label is a bit dangerous. Because the video is good for a track video, but underwhelming for an MV (imo).

Yes, Hybe didn't try very hard, but they failed him so bad even Billboard (always chasing the opportunity to badmouth kpop) wrote about it. Bad press is still press. And Army did well on Twitter, at least.

I still don't really like the song. It's like NLG in terms of very subpar production, but it's not a fan song and I love JK's voice - the more I listened to NLG, the more I liked it; JK, as always, added tons of layers of vocals and the song has a lot of small details to pay attention to. But I just don't like Jimin's voice in the song (Pdogg being himself with the autotune), so I'm not sure it'll grow on me.

I think Jimin does best with a darker sound, like Lie, but the level of effort put into his darker tracks is way bigger than this lighter ones (which are mostly fan songs). Think of the complexity behind Lie, LC and SMF vs. CTT and SGMB. We always have this argument when a bright song isn't well received (or gets some criticism). If you don't enjoy a fun song, you're a party pooper who hates fun, but what Army doesn't like Dope, Fire, Airplane Pt.2, Go Go, Just One Day, I Like It Pt.2, Baepsae, Spine Breaker, Anpanman, Jump, Coffee, Disease, Telepathy, Run BTS, etc.? You see where I'm going with this? Everyone loves BTS's lighter or funner songs - it's what they're known for imo - but you aren't allowed to dislike PTD without being accused of hating fun. It's like the whole fandom hating the English trilogy for being Western sounding, without somehow acknowledging that the most beloved BTS songs are extremely Western sounding (Just One Day, I Like It Pt.2, House of Cards, Coffee, Airplane Pt.2, Pied Piper, Love Maze, etc.). Maybe people didn't love BWL, but most of their hard sounding kpop songs do worse (like Idol vs. DNA).

Regardless, Serendipity, Filter and Promise are some of Jimin's most beloved songs and they aren't dark. And Christmas Love and CTT aren't dark at all. Only Lie and Face are dark, so tbh I don't understand why people associate him with dark music and think he's branching out with SGMB. It's only due to Face and the fact that all his darker songs are performance songs with lots of impact (and his best performances in BTS are in songs like Black Swan). SGMB is very close to CTT imo. It brings nothing new in terms of showing what Jimin likes or can do. It only surprises because I expected more quality from a pre-release and his album in general. But I think Muse is more of a parting gift than an exploration of his artistry. Also, I guess lyrically I was expecting something more too.

Tbh, I still don't quite know who Jimin is as a musical artist. I know who he is as a dancer and performer, but, as a musical artist, it's a big question mark. Besides Jin, he is, to me, the one with least defined musical identity and signature. His fan songs all have a certain sound, but, beyond that, I don't know... I'm not sure this album will clear things up any. I wish he worked with other producers.

I didn't mean to sound harsh, but I keep reading the same perspectives, and I just disagree with them...

Thanks for the ask!

[sanaexus]

social's as sae's girlfriend

-liked by shiidoryu, isaichii and 125.2k others

yourusername: don't be fooled he actually enjoys being with me (the last image is him when he sees me)

tagged: itoshi_sae

itoshi_sae: fuck off ↳yourusername: don't fuck off, fuck me instead ↳itoshi_sae: oh god i hate you ↳yourusername: no you don't ↳itoshi_sae: i don't

shiidoryu: wow sae you've never looked at me like that?? 💔💔😔😔 ↳itoshi_sae: you're an eyesore ↳shiidoryu: and she's not?? ↳yourusername: RUDE ASF?? YOU LOOK LIKE A TOMATO TFYM ↳itoshi_sae: as much as i hate saying it out loud she's pretty i guess ↳yourusername: was the "i guess" necessary? ↳mikka.kaiser: did you use the tomato as tomato or tomato? ↳yourusername: i used it as tomato ↳mikkar.kaiser: ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID? ITS TOMATO ↳yourusername: BOY STAFU ITS TOMATO ↳mikka.kaiser: NO??? ↳yourusername: SQAURE UP BITCH I'LL FUCKING FIGHT YOU ↳mikka.kaiser: BET

nikkoki: who got bro smiling like that? ↳yourusername: the waitress ↳nikkoki: elaborate ↳yourusername: she was approaching us multiple times, we thought she liked sae nah turns out she's gay thought i was cute thought sae was my brother and asked for my number lol ↳eita.otoya: ohhhh that's why he looks like he's ab to fight someone ↳yourusername: he don't bite 🥰😋 ↳itoshi_ sae: yes i do tf? ↳yourusername: no you don't

isaichii: he's secretly a hopeless romantic (it's canon you won't change my mind) ↳yourusername: frfr (it is i caught him watching shoujo) ↳isaichi: (NAH WAIT FR?) ↳yourusername: (DEAD SERIOUS) ↳itoshi_sae: for context she put it on, forced me to watch it with her and then left the room ↳yourusername: BOO HOO PARTY POOPER

-liked by kuniisuke, chigi.who and 139.7k others

itoshi_sae: cute (the cat)

tagged: yourusername

karasu_tabito: OH EMM GEE SAE POSTING SOMETHING THAT ISN'T SOCCER?!?!?! ↳mikka.kaiser: for FUCKS SAKE MATE IT'S FOOTBALL ARE YOU AMERICAN OR SOMETHING? ↳megubachi: RAHHH WHAT'S A KILOMETER🔥🔥💯💯🦅🦅💣💣🔫 🔫🔛🔝🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 ↳isaichii: FREEDOM RAHHH 🔥🔥💯💯🦅🦅💣💣🔫 🔫🔛🔝🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 ↳itoshi_sae: sigh

yourusername: OMGOMGOMGOMG IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING SAE'S POSTING ME?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?! ↳shiidoryu: you might have won the war but i'll win the battle ↳yourusername: that's the wrong fucking qoute dumbass ↳reo.miikage: quote* and it isn't even a quote it's idiom ↳rin.itoshi: fucking dumbasses it's a phrase ↳yourusername: kys 🤬🤬

user1: she's🎀so🎀coquette🎀 ↳yourusername: ikr sae called that bow stupid :( ↳itoshi_sae: and i apologized and watched inside out with you ↳yourusername: i know i just like making you feel bad

julian.loki: sae apologizing wasn't on 2024 bingo card but love to see it ↳user2: fr now all that man needs to do is apologize to the better sibling ↳itoshi_sae: fuck off ↳yourusername: what he meant to say is "yes of course" his autocorrect must be acting up ↳itoshi_sae: no, i said what i said

-liked by itoshi_sae, rin.itoshi and 144.3k others

yourusername: did you know i like the beach? i like the beach also sae in his photographer era 😝

tagged: itoshi_sae

itoshi_sae: i was taking picture of the food and you had to ruin it ↳yourusername: you're not gonna say allat when you legit forced me to pose for like 15 minutes ↳itoshi_sae: shut up

user2: her eyelashes are so pretty ☹☹ ↳yourusername: stop im gonna kiss u 👉👈 ↳itoshi_sae: not on my watch ↳user2: boo hoo your js jealous i got a chance ↳itoshi_sae: fuck off ↳yourusername: that's not nice

reo.miikage: damn that looks fine ↳hiyori: what the fuck . ↳kuniisuke: what. ↳reo.miikage: THE FOOD I MEAN YALL ARE SO PERVERTED?? ↳kenyu.yukimiya: MAYBE YOU SHOULD SPECIFY??

nagi.seishiro: who took this pictures though ↳yourusername: idk it was in sae's gallery so i took it lol ↳rin.itoshi: y/n wtf what if some creepy old bald oily man took it? ↳yourusername: that's my type 🥰 ↳itoshi_ sae: wtf? ↳yourusername: shh look away

shiidoryu: i thought he hated the beach? ↳yourusername: HUH?? BRO THAT MAN PLAYS FOR A SPANISH TEAM?? HE'S ALMOST ALWAYS SURROUNDED BY WATER? ↳shiidoryu: IDK BRO HE TOLD ME HATED BEACHES WHEN I ASKED HIM TO COME W ME ↳yourusername: I THINK THAT'S BC YOU ASK HIM AND HE DIDN'T WANNA GO W YOU ↳shiidoryu: THAT'S SO RUDE??

itoshi_sae: you're pretty ↳yourusername: OMGG IT'S HAPPENING OMGOMGOMG CODE RED ↳isaichii: WOOO HOOOOO ↳nikkoki: ITS HAPPENING !! ↳nikkoki: WAIT WHAT'S CODE RED AGAIN ↳chigi.who: js cheer her on ↳itoshi_sae: y/n why are your friends like this ↳yourusername: THEY'RE YOUR FRIENDS TOO? ↳itoshi_sae: nah

wooo we're finally done?? idk how i feel ab this but i hope you enjoyed it <3

[j0kers-light]

How do you think the joker would react to Y/N taking him on a data to the farm and they see a crooked mouth Alpaca 😭

cuz this shit gave me a heart attack 😞

@reneisance my beloved. My love for alpacas would have me screaming with joy.

I live not too far from a farm and each Christmas the fam drives me there so I can see these majestic creatures. Ugh! I’m rambling… let’s talk about it! In a completely un-biased manner of course.. 👀🖤✨

It smells. That’s the only thing on Jokers mind. He's only here because you suggested this as a 'fun outdoor date'.

Obviously your definition of fun is secretly a method of capital torture because he's two seconds away from turning this farm into a crime scene.

You hold J back when you see him beginning to stalk up to a group of people with murder on his mind.

Joker hates people and being normal. You know this. Why can't he take you dancing on top of a chemical plant or let you ride shotgun during a high speed case on the expressway?! Anything but this.

Can't he just wait in the car? One look from you tells him: No. No he can not.

Joker wore his normal mask that covers his scars in public but he's debating on doubling up... how can anyone tolerate this smell all day?

"J, I know you ain't talking. You go days without showering." And I oop. He' s insulted but has no comeback to relieve that burn. Moving right along...

You're running around like a kid in a candy store, pointing at every animal on display with a disgruntled Joker trailing behind you. He's your personal shadow/party pooper and everyone gives you a wide berth after sensing Joker's dark aura.

Why are you going crazy over these dumb looking animals anyways? Some of them appear to be on death's door and the intense heat isn't helping. Why is it so hot? How come you aren't complaining about the heat? He could use that big drag fan you were using earlier...

Wait. Where did you go?! Perfect, you gave him an excuse to tear this place apart (not like he needed on but anyhoo).

Joker hears your loud, joyful squeal and sighs in relief. He can stop his imminent rampage, you're not in any immediate danger, but now he has to figure out what captured your attention to make you stray from his sight.

He thought he told you not to in the car, but yet again. When have you ever followed his orders?

"ALPACA!!!!!"

Joker barely heard your loud squeal over the hyper children screaming and running around the farm. It's too much noise for his taste, but it will be a cold day in hell before he misses a single word you utter.

He tunes out the unnecessary noise and hones in on your voice. There. He finds you jumping for joy in front of a stall. He doesn't see anything worth your level of excitement until a.. creature walks up to sniff your outstretched hand.

He hopes to any higher being, that this isn't what you're going crazy over. Unfortunately, it is. His Bunny is ecstatic all because of... whatever this is.

"What is it? Can it see?" Joker ponders aloud.

You hit his shoulder and let the funky looking alpaca sniff your other hand. It takes in your darker complexion and deems you friendly. It loiters nearby for you to fangirl over more. One could say you are enthralled; however, you hear Joker's snide comment and turn his way with a theatrical gasp.

"How dare you disrespect this majestic creature! Of course it can see!" You scoff at J before facing the alpaca again. More have appeared, more likely attracted to your inner light.

The sudden gathering of alpacas draws the attention of kids and their parents. Everyone comments on how you're an 'alpaca magnet' and an employee allows you to enter the enclosure to be one with the herd. You are living a dream, soaking up this once in a lifetime opportunity.

Joker just sees you being surrounded by smelly, ugly looking goats. He seen some wild things in his life but this is up there. And this is supposed to be a date. O...kay....

As long as your happy, he can endure whatever this is.