#sae social media au | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

saerins · 1 year ago

Text

⋆୨ chapter three ୧˚ for a while, you were all mine

⋆୨ if not for you (masterlist) ⋆୨ previous: chapter two - a million miles away, still you connect me in your way <> next: chapter four - behind a box of reasons why ୧˚

⋆୨ synopsis ୧˚ neither of you want this. both you and sae reluctantly agree to this marriage, although sae’s dissatisfaction far outweighs your own. with hidden agendas and old flames, will this ever work out between the two of you, or will your forced spark be doomed to fail?

ೀ series: sae x f!reader | wc 6.3k | ೀ content warnings: fluff/angst, modern au, arranged marriage, rich!sae and rich!reader, jealousy/paranoia, third parties, yn and sae finally sharing one bed | notes: eeep this was long i’m sorry !! more of the other girl here heh ^_< also mwah thank you to all of you who’s reading ily !! <3

In hindsight, maybe it wasn’t right of you to go through your husband’s stuff. Maybe you should’ve just looked at that little black box and left it there and continue to be ignorant.

But no. In this world, you’re nosy and greedy and you wanted to know who exactly it is that Itoshi Sae of all people can’t get over and now you have exactly what you were looking for.

After extensive research—and by research you mean scrolling through your husband’s social media (all of them), you managed to find her tagged in a post buried way below on his Facebook wall. Silver lining is: there’s nothing recent. The bad part? Judging by the date, they’ve known each other for a long time.

Apparently her name is Mirin, and her family’s made up of a whole slew of top lawyers in the whole of Japan. There’s not a lot on her Facebook, but her Instagram is a whole other story. Her posts the last few years put her somewhere in Europe, and judging by the content, she’s been studying there for a while. But before that, back when the posts were all in Japan, you catch a few photos of Sae. Some of them have Oliver and Eita, and a couple of other guys you haven’t met before.

It’s really wrong of you to do this, only because you know you’re just setting yourself up for a world of paranoia, but you can’t stop. You move over to the pictures she’s tagged in, and there’s one from Oliver that catches your attention.

Because it’s dated a few weeks back.

The first of two photos show Oliver, Eita, Sae and the same guy you saw back in Mirin’s feed—the one with jet black spiky hair. They’re in a bar, you presume, sitting around a private booth with a ton of alcohol in the ice bucket on the table. You recognise his attire; it’s from the very first night Sae bothered to sit down at the dining table and eat with you.

The second makes your heart crash to the floor. In the photo, in Sae’s place is Mirin herself, looking drop-dead gorgeous in a skin-tight red dress that you wouldn’t ever think of wearing. (One, because it’s much too revealing for your own taste, and two, well, just because you’re more of an oversized t-shirt kind of girl.)

All you can take away from what you saw is that Mirin is now back in Japan. Coupled with the fact that Sae had been gone even though he was off from work for those first few days of your marriage, you deduce what you wish isn’t true—was he meeting up with her all this time? Even

Trying to avoid falling into utter madness, you grab your phone and text your ever-trusty best friend.

Reo, meet you at our usual. ASAP!!!

Just as you’re about to leave the house, Sae gets back from wherever he’s been (which now you can’t help but wonder whether he was meeting Mirin), and you run right into his chest.

“Careful, busy?” Sae asks, which is more than Sae usually does and you realise just how low the bar is set right now.

Still, you answer him like you always do. “Yeah I’m gonna meet Reo for a bit,” you tell him, biting back a snarky comment about Mirin.

Even with those doubts of Sae in your head, you can’t help but stop to appreciate how he hands you your keys from the key hanger before you forget, or how his other hand is gripping onto yours, warm and just slightly calloused. It’s the first time you’ve felt them since that day at your own wedding.

“Take your time, I’ll handle our dinner tonight,” he tells you, and you think that’s already a lot considering that he’s never really bothered with anything the past few weeks, but then you feel a soft sensation against your forehead—very brief, so unfamiliar, way too soft—and then it’s gone in just a second and it’s way too quick that it has you doubting its existence at all.

All you hear is a soft “see you” before the door shuts behind you, and then there’s only the erratic beating of your heart that fills your ears.

“Yikes.”

“Very helpful, thanks,” you sigh exasperatedly as you plop down onto the cushioned seat across from Reo.

Reo laughs, handing you your phone back, open to Oliver’s Instagram account. “Then ask for a divorce, I’m sure he’d happily oblige if all of that’s true.”

“You know why I can’t, Reo,” you remind him, close to giving up.

Reo nods, remembering about your parents and deciding not to make matters worse. “Did you ask him about it though?”

You frown, glaring up at your best friend who’s now happily sipping on his cold brew. “And let him guess that I was stalking his ex? Sure I did.”

Reo snorts at your sarcasm. He thinks it’s funny how you’re oddly meek in front of Sae, and yet you’re snappish around him. Comes with the many years of being best friends, he supposes. But on that note, “you think there’s something going on between them?”

For the first time, Reo sees you helpless, eyes staring into nothing, index finger idly tracing circles on the polished wooden surface. “I don’t know,” because all you know is that you’re already exhausted from overthinking all the things they could be doing behind your back. “But… he’s always away and he says it’s work when I know it’s not. And she’s back and they were at the same place and urgh, I don’t know what to do.”

By that last line, you’re already burying your head in your hands, slumped against the table, Reo watching on as you grumble in frustration. He chuckles, gently patting your head before you look up at him, “what if they’re just friends right now?”

“It’s still weird, isn’t it? I mean… from the looks of it, they were pretty serious at one point.” Your words are all muffled because you’re pretty sure this is you being jealous now—thanks to Sae considerably warming up to you (be it at his own sluggish pace), it’s hard not to feel anything for him. In a way, you’re learning to like a lot about him, but there’s this unshakeable doubt you can’t brush off in the form of his ex.

Reo leans back against his chair now, pondering out loud. “Hmm I wonder what that reminds me of.”

In a second, you know all too well what he’s referring to, and you find yourself unable to look him in the eye. “That’s… different. We didn’t act on it.”

He rests his elbow on the table, head resting against his fist, “yeah but… we were still each other’s first kiss, right?”

“But we didn’t amount to anything.”

“Except that we’re best friends now,” Reo tells you, and you know he’s trying to get a point across but you’re not sure you want to understand it.

“And that’s all we ever were, Reo.”

Smiling, Reo leans forward a little, cautious at keeping his voice down. It won’t do if people misunderstand and word gets around. “Listen, I don’t know about you, but you were all I wanted at one point. For more than just that one day under the cherry blossoms, more than that one time I stole your first kiss.”

It stuns you a little to hear it, because any romantic emotions between the two of you were never said or shared. Both you and Reo knew back then that your parents wouldn’t ever be in favour of him and his rebelliousness that you both just decided it wasn’t worth the hassle. At that time, when you were both foolish kids, having that something intangible was enough. Maybe it faded for you faster than it had for Reo, but he knew that it once existed. Even if only for a second.

“And?”

You’ve gone soft now, and Reo knows you understand. You’re just in denial.

“Are you sure Sae would feel the same if he knew about it? If he knew I used to love you too?” Reo asks you, genuinely wondering for himself.

You’re about to argue that Sae doesn’t even care, but putting yourself into his shoes, you get where Reo’s coming from. History is history. No matter how long ago it was or how short the relationship (or lack of one) was, the feelings still existed, once upon a time.

Still, you have a feeling that there’s more than meets the eye. Especially if Sae has to hide it all the time. He’s never even said her name to you, if they met at all.

“Anyway look, do you want me to try asking Oliver about it? I’ll be discreet, though I can’t really say the same for that knucklehead,” Reo warns you. It’s not like he knows Oliver much outside of any business dealings, but he can tell that much at least.

You shake your head anyway, knowing it’s a bad idea. For all you know, Sae would just lash out at you for prying into his business when you’re just his on-paper wife.

“Wonder why they broke up though,” you think out loud, watching the liquid in your cup swish around, close to spilling off the edge as you swirl it with your hand, almost completely lost in thought.

Reo answers you without missing a beat. “She went abroad to study and just called it off thinking it wouldn’t work.” His eyes go wide the moment your head shoots up, and he winces after letting it slip.

“You knew?”

“Yeah…”

“What the- how?” Because it’s incredulous how Reo happens to know that much more about the relationship.

He sighs, fessing up. “I was asking around about Sae remember? When I told you he’s just a tough nut to—”

“Yeah yeah,” you wave it off, wanting him to get to the point.

“Well, Oliver’s kinda a blabbermouth so…” Reo sighs, as if he senses there’s no point in keeping it in, not when you’re already halfway into that rabbit hole yourself.

And you’re all ears. Half because you really just want to learn more about it and the other half just wanting confirmation that you’re not crazy for overthinking about this. But then Reo tells you and you’re not sure anymore.

“He said Sae was never over her, loved her to bits.” Reo pauses, hesitating before he opens his mouth again. “He said Sae was waiting for her to get back before starting things up again.”

Oh.

SEVEN YEARS AGO.

“You’re kidding me, right?”

Surely it wasn’t a stretch to be furious that distance would be enough of a reason for a breakup? Surely Sae didn’t have to think himself crazy for refuting such an idea?

Mirin’s hair flowed in the wind, pretty as it always was, and it would be even prettier in his memories. She looked unsure, and he knew it too. He knew her like the back of his hand, down to the injury on his ankle. She was only doing what she thought was right, and that was offering each of their own freedom, though Sae had no single doubt in his mind that that wasn’t what he wanted.

“Sae, please don’t make this harder than it already is,” she told him, her eyes swimming with tears that she wouldn’t allow to overflow.

Always so stubborn, and forever thinking less of herself. That was how he knew her to be. And as much as he hated that stubbornness at that moment, he loved her just as much.

With a hand reaching out to her, he pulled her to him, letting her rest her head in his chest, something that he savoured because it wouldn’t be long until she’ll be gone for who knows how long.

“Is it selfish of me to say I don’t want to break up with you?” Sae was asking her, genuinely. He didn’t know how to handle this—when life held different paths for two people in love, wasn’t it just common sense that they could still tread it and yet be together? Was long distance really the end of everything they had?

Mirin sniffled just a little before she pulled away and forced herself to smile, something that Sae hated. It was always the fake ones that irked him, even now.

“Is it selfish for me to think that we’re supposed to?”

Maybe he didn’t know the answer. But all he knew was that if she still felt like they should, then he’d concede. He was always weak when it came to her. It was always the same. He couldn’t imagine being weak to anyone else. It was her. Only her.

“Fine, we’ll do that, if that’s what you want,” he told her, a tone so gentle that no one but her has ever heard. But he drew close, tipping her chin up so she would look at him, his teal eyes appreciating every inch of her beautiful face, the most beautiful one he had ever seen, and the most beautiful one he thought he would ever see. “But you know something?”

Mirin swallowed the lump in her throat, the amount of love she felt threatening to swallow her whole. “What?”

Sae let out a deep chuckle, a soft one before he pressed his lips against hers, a promise laid between their lips like it was a secret only they both would keep.

“Nothing would stop me from waiting for you to come back. So come back to me, okay? Come back, I’ll wait for you.”

That night when you get home, you feel just slightly numb. After hearing what you did, it’s no surprise. You’ve always been kind of weak when it comes to feelings. You’re more heart over mind and you’d choose your heart over and over again even if you had no more blood left to bleed.

You think you’re never getting over it until you walk in and realise that Sae’s in the kitchen, setting your dinner down on the table. It’s like your tears automatically dissipate once you look into his eyes.

“Oh, just nice,” is all he mumbles before he sits down at his place on the entirely too-big dining table for the two of you.

Across from him, you sit down as you look at the spread before you. A steak on each of your plates, potato puree at the side. In the middle there’s assorted sides of mushrooms, corn kernels and what you assume to be a tray of sauces for the meat.

“Did you cook all of these?” You ask, almost breathless. You’re about to say he’s a much better cook than you are, until Sae speaks up.

“No.” He seems nearly unwilling to answer you, a delicate frown on his face. “Accidentally burnt the pans when I tried to cook.”

“Huh?” You spin your head around to find the sink filled with all your pans, and from the looks of it, Sae had been trying to scrub the burnt portions off unsuccessfully.

“We need to buy new pans.”

Sae says this all too monotonously, like he’s half-robot and half completely embarrassed, that you can’t help but laugh out loud. Besides, it’s kind of cute that there’s a faint pink on his cheeks. You’ve never seen that before.

He looks at you incredulously, like he wasn’t expecting you to laugh at him like he’s a damn clown. Flinging a mushroom at you with his fork, he rolls his eyes. “Shut up,” he groans.

Pouting at him mockingly, you decide to tease him a little more. “You didn’t touch anything else in the house and ruin them, did you?”

And you were joking, until you realise Sae’s averting his gaze, stuffing his mouth full with corn kernels.

“Sae!”

“We might need to get new stuff for the laundry room too,” he confesses, talking with his mouth full. (Spoiler: you find out later that he put the wrong detergents in the washer and accidentally flooded the laundry room.)

Still, you think it’s sort of endearing that he tried to do the chores while you were the one out for a change, so you stop yourself from making fun of him too much. It’s not like whatever you learned earlier isn’t still sitting in the back of your head (because a part of you wonders if he’s doing all this out of guilt), but some part of you wants to be selfish and let yourself feel special, even if it’s delusional, at least for a little bit.

You want to feel like the wife he misses when you’re not around, like the person he would think of when his mind strays. Is this all too much to ask?

Maybe you just can’t help yourself, so you bring yourself to ask: “Sae, why did you agree to this?”

There’s a pregnant pause in the room, the only sounds filling the silence being the stainless steel cutlery hitting the plates as Sae adjusts himself. “Why did you?”

You suppose that maybe it’ll be easier for him to share if you start first, so you bite the bait. “Long story but… if I don’t then it’ll fall to my sister and she’s happy with someone else.” You swallow the meat in your mouth, the fat rendered so well it makes you crave for more. “I don’t want her to have to sacrifice that. Our parents aren’t exactly the nicest people in the world.”

Sae listens to you, an understanding settling in his chest. He could laugh from the coincidence of it all. “Same, but for my brother,” he tells you, prodding at his steak. “And he’s happy with soccer, not some girl. Can’t get a girl to save his life.”

Somehow, you can hear the quiet fondness that he has for Rin that makes you believe he’s a good brother.

“Would a marriage affect his career all that much?”

There’s a certain complexity behind Sae’s expression when you ask that question, something that you can’t decipher. But he scoffs, “let’s just say, my parents aren’t the nicest people either. I would know.”

And something tells you that it’s not something you want to ask yet, so you let his answer sit with you.

“Oh, speaking of parents,” Sae brings up his phone, switching the subject and handing it over to you. It’s a string of texts between him and his mother, apparently. You hold it up to your face, reading through and it appears they’d gotten you both tickets. “Mine got us both tickets, so.”

As you scroll, a grin appears on your face as you look at him. “Honeymoon tickets to Korea?” You’re almost squealing. It’s been a long while since you’ve last had a vacation, and ten days of distraction sounds really nice after all the information you’d just learned today.

Sae rolls his eyes, though you don’t miss the slight tug upwards at the corner of his lips. “Yeah, so get packing, we leave in two days.”

And as excited as you are, you feel a vibration and the brief flash of ‘dummy’ messaging him, the only part of the preview that you can see being: no, take me with you :(

You’re pretty sure it vibrates some more but by then, you’re already handing the phone back and Sae just locks his phone without bothering. Shaking your head, you try to stuff that image back to the deepest crevices of your mind, determined to not let it ruin your mood for your getaway.

Ex lover or not, Sae is still your husband and it’s not like he hates this (by the looks of things, it’s only been getting better and better), so you’re still hell bent on making things work.

Two days fly by way too quickly.

The day after Sae tells you about the trip, you immediately get to work at packing. Ten days is not a short trip and you plan to make full use of it, and for that, you have to be ready.

You had spent the whole day buying anything you would need—travel-friendly items and whatnot—while commuting back home to your parents’ house (at a timing you know they’re at work, of course!) to take anything you might’ve left there that you needed. Just as you left the house, nostalgia took over as you looked around at the place where you grew up.

It’s strange. People say to cherish what time you have with your parents, that one day you’re going to move out and you’re going to miss it.

You don’t feel like that’s necessarily true, because you’re living proof. The only thing you’d miss is your sister and you still talk to her everyday. Meanwhile, the only times your mother or father ever talks to you is to ask you about your marriage and warning you not to annoy Sae too much, as though it was a given and that it shouldn’t be the other way around.

Maybe it doesn’t make much sense; you and Sae (or maybe just you) trying to be a family when you both have no idea what a proper family is like. Even if it is just on paper.

Now you’re on a town car to the airport and you’re fiddling with your passport in your hands, staring out the window like a little child that’s going overseas for the first time. (Next to you, Sae’s thinking the exact same thing—you do look so much like an excited child. Or maybe a puppy.)

Of course, Sae’s parents waste no expenses in gifting you two first-class seats. Not that you’ve never been in first class, but it’s nice to be next to Sae, and you catch yourself, realising just how quickly you’re catching feelings.

“What?” Sae’s just getting ready to turn his phone to flight-safe mode when he catches you staring, a hint of smugness forming inside of him.

Even with a small partition separating your seats, you can see his teal eyes staring at you, long lashes fluttering in all its glory. Instead of offering an answer, you just shake your head and lean back, busying yourself by adjusting the screen in front of you.

Being in a state of denial is easy; it’s actually fun to sit in first class next to Sae, on a three-hour flight to your honeymoon, annoying him each chance you get, earning yourself a death stare every instant before laughing yourself silly when he flips off at you. It’s been a few weeks, but you think you’ve grown accustomed to what Sae is like that you know his middle fingers to you are never meant to be taken seriously and his silence is just how he is when he isn’t fully opened up. It nearly makes you think you’re crazy for doubting him and yet you don’t have the balls to question him about any of that. Not yet, because you’re not ready for this to end (if it will).

The itinerary had already been planned out by Sae’s mother, but it wasn’t like either of you wanted to follow it. One, Sae likes to do things spontaneously anyway and two, well, you have a feeling that he might want to treat this like a solo trip. It’s not like either of you have properly been husband and wife much to have a proper honeymoon together.

So count you surprised when you suggested that you both try to do solo trips around the city and just meet up for dinner, only to have Sae agree and yet follow you wherever you decide to go that first day.

At first, you were just wondering whether he had the same plans, but after he followed you into a Sephora looking absolutely clueless and then getting all flustered and sticking to you the moment the staff there asked him if he wanted to do a skin test, you allow yourself to think that he’s actually tagging along with you.

“What are you doing?” You decide to ask after exiting another store, carrying no less than five bags thanks to your anxiety of asking Sae what he’s up to.

On his part, he merely shrugs and looks away, hands in his coat pocket, looking absolutely like a model out of a magazine. Sometimes you wonder if he’s really yours. On paper, at least.

“This is our honeymoon, right? Makes sense that we’re together.” That’s all the explanation Sae offers, his gaze hovering over the bags you’re carrying, before he leans closer. “Besides, you’re my wife,” he says, gently grabbing your bags and carrying it for you.

He doesn’t say that it’s just on paper this time. And you can’t help but read into it. It’s perplexing how easily his words can affect you. It has your heart doing somersaults and your lips nervously pursing together.

“So, where next?” He prompts, looking at you expectantly.

And maybe you’re a little too excited for this pleasant turn of events that you’re grinning from ear to ear as you stare at him. “Wait, really?”

You can’t even hide the glee in your voice and Sae, for the first time, smiles—even if he’s doing it as he rolls his eyes at you.

“Yes, stupid,” he tells you, chuckling as you hop slightly in excited. “Are we going or are you just gonna stand here like a little puppy?”

With excited nods and a little squeal, you clap your hands together before daring to put your fingers around his wrist, dragging him with you.

Sae follows quietly behind you, staring at you as you happily tread ahead, your hands warm and guarding his against the slightly chilly air, hair flowing in the wind and he suddenly thinks you’re even prettier than he first thought you were. And then he starts thinking that maybe this part of his life that’s planned by his parents isn’t so bad after all.

Though, when you get back to the hotel, you find out that Sae has already specially asked for two separate beds, to the surprise of all the hotel staff, because of course, Mrs Itoshi had booked the honeymoon suite for the both of you. Special requests for that room usually mean flowers on the bed, or breakfast just the way they like it—not for the groom of all people to be asking for a separate bed altogether, especially when he insists there is no additional person.

“I’ll sleep out here,” Sae tells you the moment you get back to the hotel that night, gesturing to the bed set up by the television, much to your bummer. But you suppose you can’t expect too much—hand holding was already a miracle in itself.

“Oh yeah, sure,” you shrug it off, like it doesn’t even matter. Deep down you feel like a rock was dropped from your throat to the bottom of your stomach, forming a gaping hole in your heart along the way that you tried to will into non-existence.

Still, somehow, despite this little obstacle, you find yourself optimistic after being witness to Sae’s change in demeanour.

“Hey, Y/N?”

When you turn around, you see a hint of hesitation flicker across his teal eyes before he shakes his head, brushing it off.

“It’s nothing, goodnight.”

Although you’re curious, you decide not to press him about it. Offering a small smile, you nod.

“Goodnight, Sae.”

Over the course of your entire honeymoon, you find that you shouldn’t be chiding yourself for being delusional in the first place.

For once in this one-sided love affair, you feel like perhaps it’s not so one-sided at all. Because from what you’ve learned about Sae in your close-to-minimal time together, he isn’t someone that you can force into doing anything he doesn’t want to. At least when it comes to mundane activities which includes trips. (Unless you’re his parents who you have no doubt in your mind probably mirrors your own and have their ways of controlling him, per se.)

But it’s hard to think he doesn’t want to do any of this with you when he’s so compliant. He follows your bucket list of things to do and doesn’t complain once. He lets you drag him to the palace and looks only slightly concerned when you tell him you want to “do the thing where we can dress up like royalty and take pictures” but he only sighs and concedes within seconds.

When he comes out of the room looking like the most handsome prince you’d ever met, you’re too shy to meet his gaze but he tilts your head up to look at him for most of the shots anyway. With his face so close to yours, with these kinds of small gestures which he willingly initiates, you begin to wonder if it’s possible to make him happy in this possibly loveless marriage.

Spending ten days together, surrounded by just each other and doing things that couples do; it nearly makes you feel as if this is real. Like Sae really loves you and that he had asked you to marry him one day out of the blue because of it. Nothing like how you felt that first time you met him, in your dressing room minutes before you were about to become husband and wife, being talked down to and told that this was a facade and could be nothing more.

Now he’s here with you, sticking close and following you around, entertaining your requests for activities, falling asleep on your shoulder when you were on the plane to Jeju, and sometimes he absentmindedly holds your hand like he’s used to it. He helps you with your luggage always, and he makes sure you get food whenever your stomach starts growling, and he’s more observant than you give him credit for because he starts picking the radish off your plate without you asking.

Your album’s suddenly filled with pictures of you and Sae and you were hesitant at first but dragging him to the amusement park when he wasn’t for it at first was a good decision; for a while, you get to see what he’s like when all the downturned lines on his face reverse, when he looks the most like an actual guy in his mid-twenties, enjoying life instead of brooding all the time. Thanks to that, your pictures are more both of you smiling or being goofy together instead of faceless pictures because neither of you feel like showing your faces at all.

By the time your honeymoon is about to come to an end, you find that maybe there’s hope for this after all. That maybe you’d just been overthinking everything prior to this and it shouldn’t be worth worrying over after the trip ends.

But you find that hope can be flimsy sometimes.

On the seventh night there, you and Sae are both on your bed, in the actual bedroom, fighting (not literally) over a multiplayer game. Just two adults hunched over one phone playing frustrating games meant for kids. (Somehow it makes you feel like perhaps neither of you ever had a normal childhood and this is something to make up for it.) It’s all fun and games until you see a throng of message notifications from dummy mixed in with several from what you presume to be Sae’s group chat with the guys.

And you can keep pretending like it doesn’t matter, except Sae immediately stops after the current round and tells you he has to take a call. And you already know more or less who he’s going to talk to. And just like that, you feel like you’re back to square one all over again.

The subsequent nights (and days) aren’t easy for you either. After just giving up on thinking and forcing yourself to sleep that night, you’d been stuck with paranoia everyday. Especially when you realise that he’s starting to take calls every night outside on the balcony where he’s sure you’re out of earshot.

You wonder if he’s being lovey dovey with her outside when he talks to her. You wonder if he imagines you as her when you’re out together. You wonder if he wishes you were her. You wonder if all this is just a gimmick; a test run for when he does the actual things with the actual girl he wants to do them with.

Safe to say, by your last night there, you’re a mess. The moment you get back from trying to be happy all day (which was a disaster because you wouldn’t stop trying to minimise contact with Sae), you tell him you’re too tired and that you’ll just go ahead and go to bed.

Which, of course, is code for ‘you just want to lie in bed and cry all night’.

Sae couldn’t even get a word out before you shut the door on him, plopping down onto the bed and crying into your pillow. Maybe holding everything in was a bad idea. Now you’re bursting with emotions and you try to call Reo a few minutes later but you can’t even get him because he’s busy somehow and you’re positive that the gods hate you right now.

There is one thing about being on rock bottom that you like, though; at least you know how you feel. You’re exhausted and upset and envious because you wish you could be that person for your husband. But you keep getting reminded that you’re not. That somehow you’re just a mere stand-in until he marries his real wife next time. The one he promised to love forever. (Technically, he vowed that to you on your wedding day too, but that’s not the same and you know it.)

Deciding to shut off your phone and have this time to yourself to cry your eyes out, you miss the sudden swarm of notifications that come in. And thanks to you stuffing your head into the pillow, you don’t notice Sae opening the door and peeking inside, an unfamiliar feeling settling inside him at the sound of you sobbing.

He gently closes the door behind him as he walks to you, your back turned to him, your hands and feet hanging onto the bolster like a koala to a branch. Slowly, he saunters over to you, almost like he’s afraid to. When his hand rests on your shoulder and he sinks into the mattress beside you, you stiffen up for just a moment before spinning around and sobbing into his chest instead.

You didn’t expect him to even enter your room at all, much less let you stain his shirt or hold you close when you’re being emotional like this, but he stays there, hand gently rubbing your arm, up and down, a gentle kiss placed on the top of your head. It makes you wonder what kind of games he’s playing. Is this Sae not being able to make up his mind and that’s why he’s still so nice to you even when he has his old flame in the back of his head?

“Do you… want me to leave you alone?” He asks, though you can argue it’s kind of a stupid question but then you realise he probably doesn’t know much about actual relationships so you let it slide.

You shake your head in response, deciding that as stupid as it all sounds, you want to throw your hat in the ring. You’ve fallen for him, and you want him for yourself.

And maybe it’s wrong of you to project this on him, but your absence of a normal family where a home is not just a house and where parents shower their children with actual love and concern makes you yearn for one yourself. And maybe it’s not a great idea to want that from a man you married from being forced to, but thanks to this honeymoon you can see that there’s a flicker of spark there.

That Sae’s not emotionless and he’s definitely not cold to you. Not anymore. That if you guys had been given more time instead of being rushed into things by your parents then maybe the whole wedding could’ve gone without any of the hitches you experienced. That every single radish he picked off your plate, every picture he took with you, every time he held your hand, every time he pulled you close—none of that was manufactured, was it?

So isn’t it possible for you to be happy with him? So is it still foolish or selfish of you to want to be with him?

Is it too much if you ask him about it?

“Hey, Sae?” Your voice is soft and timid and more vulnerable than you’ve ever shown, but he hears you loud and clear, his “hm?” resounding against his chest, right next to your ear. “Can you stay?”

A few seconds of pause, and he replies, “of course.”

You shake your head slightly. “I don’t mean that. I mean, you know, what we said on our wedding day.” Your voice is entirely muffled, still Sae understands.

There’s an even longer pause this time, and you think that Sae’s just thinking of a way to get out of this until you hear him speak up again.

“Idiot,” he chides, but you can hear the soft affection in his voice. Suddenly, you feel his pinky wrapping around your own, and he holds it near your face. “I promise you,” he whispers, and you wish you could see the expression on his face, “I’ll stay.”

It might be wishful thinking but you think he really means it.

taglist: @kimvmarvel @mxplesyrvp @yuzurins @futuristicxie @kiopanxp @k0z3me @y-sabell-a @sae1toshilover @xoxojisu @karmatiz @sagejin @minnieminnie00-got7 @hearts4heidi @shiinobu-x @n1uh @prepchuu @leeyzhuo @shidouryusm @tsukishiro-yue2402 @kaiserkisser @pookiebearcave @dcvilxswish @saeskiss @whtflrr @arminseas @raphsimp @saharei @danibxe @lectris00 @comet-kun @ishitam67 @gskill @sweet2wthsblog *bolded: can’t tag you due to your settings >_<

#bllk x reader #blue lock x reader #itoshi sae x reader #sae x reader #bllk x you #bllk x y/n #sae x you #itoshi sae x you #sae x y/n #itoshi sae x y/n #itoshi sae #blue lock #૪ aeri’s fics !

380 notes · View notes

yazis · 2 years ago

Text

I’M NOT INTERESTED!!

SUMMARY: in which 2nd-year y/n l/n one day turns up at their high school and falls head over heels with a certain 3rd-year, one who has a strict ‘no-dating’ policy.

PAIRING: itoshi sae x fem!reader

GENRE: social media au, high school au, crack fluff and angst most likely

WARNINGS: swearing, inappropriate jokes, this is my first smau series so it’s probably gonna go wrong somewhere… i’m really disorganized sooo

START: 11/04/23

END: -

taglist is open!

PROFILES!! - y/n’s minions | prodigies

CHAPTERS!!

一 - new term new me

二 - love at first sight (written)

三 - somethings not right

四 - sibling tingz (half written)

五 - GET ME THAT NUMBER

六 - lionel ronaldo

七 - hippo

八 - take a shot (written)

九 - grandma

十 - that thing

十一 - basic bitch

十二 - wtaf

十三 - rise and shine

十四 -

十五 -

十六 -

十七 -

十八 -

十九 -

二十 -

#sae is bbg #blue lock #blue lock x reader #blue lock x y/n #blue lock x you #blue lock smau #sae itoshi x reader #sae itoshi x you #bllk sae #sae itoshi smau #sae itoshi #blue lock sae #itoshi sae x reader #itoshi sae #itoshi sae smau #my first smau 😍😍😍😍#welp wish me luck 💔#yazi ♡

685 notes · View notes

qinluofu · 2 years ago

Text

⊹﹒blue lock boys + younger sibling headcanons ♡

michael kaiser, sae & rin & oliver aiku reacting to a gn!younger sibling who just received an anonymous confession letter

masterlists ^o^

KAISER would think the confession is mid. it's just a letter and you're already fawning this hard ?? the person should've at least paired it with a rose bouquet and some nice gifts too. but noo, it was just a simple letter.

he outright snatches it from you and tells you it's a waste of time and you shouldn't be trying to investigate who sent it to you any further. you think he's being mean but really, he'd never admit he's just protective of you.

after taking the letter for himself, he quickly investigates it on his own. he WILL be texting all his friends about it & asking allll the players in the soccer club. so thanks to kaiser your confession is basically public now.

a few days later, the situation died down and no one brought it up anymore but kaiser never seemed to let the situation go. he started to pick you up from school everyday, waiting for you outside the locker room and also visiting you at lunch to tell you the most random and unnecessary things ever .

SAE & RIN said "lukewarm" at the same time, and stared at each other - giving the "don't copy me" look while you stood between them, letter in your hands. rin thinks the confession is absolute bullshit and sae thinks the confession is someone pranking you and they would be so confused like ??.

these two would always get over each other's personal beef just to protect you. everytime you were alone at lunch they'd automatically be at the seat right next to you, doting on you. not to mention that your social media is always stalked by them too, they see your every post & story, they check your every follower and following and the following of the followers too. they know your every friend and your every gossip and as far as they're aware, there's only 2 guys who you were close with, one being gay and the other already taken.

so who the hell was this anonymous person that just decided to randomly plop in out of nowhere and write a shitty letter to you ?? they were very frustrated the next few days and you were just like :|, the letter wasn't anything special to you but to your brothers it was like the devil had knocked on their door and had taken your soul away.

even as you grow up, they still bring it up, at least twice a month, and they would have the most serious expression ever, telling you, "don't ever accept random confessions without telling us beforehand, okay?" and you'd just nod along wanting them to drop it already. jesus.

OLIVER AIKU is happier than you are. he thinks it's like god has given him a blessing, that you and him are the world's undefeated players. on your way home, he tells you all the tips and tricks about how to get someone whipped for you, how to gaslight someone, how to appear offline in instagram even if you're online, et cetera.

and you just want him to shut the hell up already, giving him the "are you serious?" face. your brother was hot, he was those stereotypical jock guys who has had 25 different partners, every week there'd be a different one knocking at your door and you had just received your first confession letter, seriously.

when the both of you arrived home, oliver went to social media to flex about his younger sibling getting a confession letter. something along the lines of "following my footsteps" and "rizzler" ( you blocked him after he tagged you on 5 different posts about it ). you were slightly embarrassed as you walked into school the next day as his friend group teased you about it.

nevertheless, it was a funny experience for the both of you.

note : definitely went overboard with sae & rin but yolo , should i write more siblings au or should i write romance more ?

#sae itoshi x reader #rin itoshi x reader #itoshi siblings #sae itoshi #rin itoshi #michael kaiser #oliver aiku #kaiser x reader #aiku x reader #sae x reader #rin x reader #bllk #blue lock #itoshi archive fics #sae itoshi x y/n #rin itoshi x y/n #oliver aiku x y/n #michael kaiser x y/n

470 notes · View notes

crossbowwwdotcom · 4 days ago

Text

camilo's bllk fic reccs pt 2 (as of december 24, 2024):

- are we dancing after death? by calmgeyama ... 9.5k words and 1/1 chapters. read tags! gantz tabiori au where they all die and have to fight monsters to continue living... so terrifyingly written!!

- laced drill bits to my pointe shoes by ethereally ... 4k words and 1/1 chapters. kunigiri as old men fighting for their right to be married in jp. GREAT formatting and story and i love this so much

- conception by missiletoe .., 1.8k words and 1/1 chapters. egonoa character study pre-blue lock. its cute and short and they are just so Interesting.

- never let you come apart by ethereally ... 9k words and 1/1 chapters. i cant believe i almost forgot this one omfg. its so good! bachisagi fic set post canon with aroace isagi again. i fw it so much ughhh

- the sweetest flower by lockedskies ... 20k words and 5/? chapters. allsagi bachelor au!!! all the interactions between everyone is so good. i never realized how interesting the bachelor au could be...

- what we stand to win by raindrops_0 ... 6k words and 1/1 chapters. gen fic centered around isagi when theyre starting at bastard munchen. its just great hurt/comfort with some very relatable themes. love!

- GHOST OPERATIVES by shiryurealest13 ... 41.5k words and 23/30 chapters (chapter cap fluctuates). read tags! chatfic and still currently updating. not central focus but rinsagi, shidousae, nagireo, and tabieita. its about part of the bllk cast who are assasins are given the mission to kill reos dad and have to infiltrate reos fg (the rest of bllk) to get close to him. SO funny and the plot is actually so engaging. someone pls talk to me ab this its one of my favs rn 😭

- finding passion by strawberrytiramisu3773 ... 100k and 11/? chapters. read tags! VERY interesting canon divergence rewrite! i fear im a huge angst and whump fan and reading this was soooo good for me lol

- spoiled by vett .. 5k words and 1/1 chapters. rinsagi future fic that had me GIGGLING OMG. rin being a clingy drunk and isagi being so embarrased was so funny and i was literally freaking out lol. second hand embarrassment almost killed me but its ok!

- the language of losing by raindrops_0 ... 10.4k and 2/3 chapters. socmed kaisagi fic staged in the nel where each team gets more of a social media presence. im such a sucker for socmed fics and this one is so funny lol

- three is a charm by mistresssleepless ... 6k words and 1/1 chapters. ahhhhh i love bachirinsagi and this was so good. them having sex is referenced a lot but it isnt explicitly written (still teen+ though). theyre so cute together and i love these three together

- six facts about lobsters by smallghosts ... 3.7k words and 1/1 chapters. bachisagi kinda character study fic written from second person pov. one of the most well written things ive ever read

- fixation by celestee (jenjaemrens) ... 5k words and 1/1 chapters. rinsagi fic where isagi lives in spain and is part of re al with sae. SUCH a cool concept and im so obsessed with it

- good luck rin! by cyberialyr1 ... 60k words and 12/18 chapters. rinsagi highschool au where isagi is the new kid and rins the football team captain. very cute with internalized homophobia and angsty backstory isagi! i havent caught up since like ch9 though but its really good

- like glass from sandy ground by ethereally ... 7k words and 1/1 chapters. such a GOOD bachisagi ff where isagi is aroace but loves bachira and bachira loves him anf theyre just. struggling to figure things out. wonderfully written to portray the love of someone aroace! if ure gonna read anything on this list then read this one Please

- oat milk (and other irredeemable vices) by caluette .., 26k words and 3/3 chapters. kaisagi coffee shop au where kaiser is the frustrating customer with a long and specific order and isagi is a struggling employee. banter and light hearted enemies to lovers!

- of intrusive thoughts and sickly sweet smiles by zhiruiii ... 14k words and 4/4 chapters. soft rinsagi with isagi being a social butterfly and rin being insecure about it. cute!!!

- pretrichor by flowersforaliens... 3k words and 1/1 chapters. i LOVE. karasu centric angst fic with tabiori about karasu having an injury and having to retire. so good!

- i cant stay on your morphine (cause its making me ill) by witchcoded ... 22k words and 4/6 chapters. FEM LESBIANS ryurin!!!! perhaps the best??? the emotional constipation of rin is so good and the intimacy of them is so well written (or^o). great side roles too!

- to lose yourself in the world by thecurrator .. 25k words and 21/? chapters. egonoa fic where ego is a daycare worker, noa is his roommate, and bllk are the kids. so funny and pretty fluffy!

- art of momentum by illicitly ... 4.9k words and 1/1 chapters. cute little nagireo oneshot w nagi being protective!

- kintsukoroi by laylayli ... 54k and 3/3 chapters. read tags! kaisagi fic set after nel where kaiser finds out his dad is dead. lots of interesting grieving and well-written character study! loved this and i swear by this author

- maybe it was ego swinging by sopenation ... 3k words and 1/1 chapters. kunigiri w protective bllk and kunigami over chigiri. yk i love to see it!

- invincible like ive never been by mkat1020 ... 2k and 1/1 chapters. gen and chigiri whump during the u20. i looooove this one and isagi is such a good friend in this and its just. Good

- love you like oxygen by sweetdreamers... 12k and 1/1 chapters. kaisagi breakup and makeup fic. they have a generally toxic relationship and isagi is super sad and pathetic in this but the rest of the bllk cast comforts him and they figure shit out

- l'amour est bleu by laylayli ... 40k words and 5/5 chapters. perhaps my FAVORITE kaisagi ff and one of my fav bllk fics oat. its about isagi starting to babysit for kaisers younger sister and them falling in love during it. isagi just cares so much for kaisers younger sister and kaiser slowly starts loving him so much for it and isagi cant help but fall for kaiser its just. so endearing and i love it <3.

- world class hypocrite by aashimar ... 80.5k words and 9/10 chapters (EPILOGUE PLEASE PLEASE UPLOAD). read tags! explicit sex scenes throughout but its staged post-canon. this fic made me SICK. rinsagi au where isagi was outed as gay by rin before the wc and his life was basically ruined afterwards. the LONGING and RESENTMENT in this is the absolute peak of society. both rin and isagis characters are written so amazingly like theyre so flawed and theyre very messy people but theyre like really actually in love with each other. they say a lot of fucked up shit to each other but i still swear by this fic! the plot was SO SO intriguing and the way its written is really realistic. the chemistry is absolutely INSANE in this fic. my personal fav bllk fic and one of my fav fics ever! belongs in the hof tbh

see pt 1 here!

44 notes · View notes

lunaviee · 2 years ago

Text

INFRUNAMI — rin itoshi SMAU

(400 follower event/special!)

,, cause i was blind to see that you were right in front of me “

⨳ SYNOPSIS — rin finally realizes what he had before he lost it..is it too late? or maybe you feel the same…?

⨳ TAGS — college au, hurt/comfort, classmates to friends to lovers, social media au, f!reader, idk what i’m doing

⨳ STATUS — ongoing, started: may 27th

⨳ AUTHORS NOTES — yes ik the song is about his ex but umm we’re ignoring that!! it’s basically the same thing methinks…anyways, this is my first smau and event! hope u all enjoy!! + idk how much i’ll upload so be patient!

PROFILES ✮ TAGLIST

01. - complaints

02. - denial is a river in egypt

03. - wingman?

04. - jealousy…?

05. - ,, yn, you’re an idiot… “

06. - sae is done with rin

07. - tba…

08. - tba…

#blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #blue lock #itoshi rin x reader #bllk #rin itoshi x reader #rin itoshi #blue lock fluff #smau #social media au #bllk fluff #itoshi rin fluff #rin itoshi fluff #infrunami smau

279 notes · View notes

kitorin · 2 years ago

Text

OUR SPRING - PROFILES

Y/N'S GROUP

y/n. 17. an ambitious yet stressed student who just wants to get in and succeed in university and have a high paying career. currently dealing with rumours and harassment because of the assumption that they're dating kira ryosuke.

meguru. 17. going pro in soccer, is on the school soccer team. really into kpop and jpop, as well as jdramas and kdramas. biggest concern right now is either y/n's drama or the fact that they don't bother with people aside from him and yoichi.

yoichi. 18. also aiming to be a professional soccer player. is on the team with meguru. equally as unhinged as meguru, just in a verbal manner instead of physical. current concerns are the national level and kira.

CHIGIRI'S GROUP - public ver

CHIGIRI'S GROUP - private ver

egoism. the rising idol group of japan. famous for their wide range of music and their stunning visuals. run by the company blue lock entertainment, with ego jinpachi as ceo and anri teieri as their manager.

hyoma. 17. main rapper of the group. never intended on being an idol or actor until anri scouted him, which led to his sister and mother encouraging him to give it a go. all he wants to do is sing and perform the songs he loves, but is constantly dealing with dating rumours and accusations, as well as obsessive fans.

rin. 17. main vocalist, but can rap too. initially wanted to beat his brother as a soccer player, but switched to the music industry due to soccer consuming his life and his obsession with beating sae ruining his self esteem. still plays a lot of soccer and workouts out a lot.

nagi. 20. also a main vocalist. became an idol because he had a knack for it. all he wants is an income that lets him live comfortably, and one that he can achieve "easily" (compared to studying at uni).

reo. 19. main dancer. his father disapproved of pursuing music, but reo insisted because the status and fame of an idol can't be achieved with money and he wanted to earn something by himself as once. he's also studying business while consistently practicing for concerts.

MASTERLIST | ONE

PAIRING. chigiri hyoma x reader

SYNOPSIS. school gets overwhelming with constant rumours and accusations, thankfully someone is willing to help. but what happens when this mutually beneficial agreement escalates into something more?

GENRE. social media au, fake dating, idol / actor au, high school au

AUTHOR'S NOTE. a lot of songs will be referenced, none of these are mine and belong to their respective owners. i will add the composer / artist as well :)

TAGLIST. open

#EXACTLY 2 AM OH GOD #i made the matching headers for the boys btw #drove me insane but i did it #our spring - kouyun #chigiri hyoma #chigiri hyoma fluff #chigiri x reader #blue lock #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #itoshi rin #bllk #fluff #chigiri x y/n #chigiri scenarios #smau #bllk smau

100 notes · View notes

imagination-mess · 2 years ago

Text

Blue Lock: Manager Au

Manga spoilers (After U-20 Arc)

After the U-20 tournament, and the hard work of managers who prompted the events to the best of their abilities with the members they were assigned with. Once the break was over and coming back, all of the remaining managers had to underground another round of elimination which is promoting their assigned members of blue lock in the good light. It is also promoting them to sponsors of their abilities. This time around is centralized in social media management and physical physique.

This would involve heavy editing of photographs and video clips. If you don’t know anything about it, you gonna wing it and self-teach yourself. You also would be required to do the daily physical training depending the whoever you want to be training under.

The members that you could be assigned could be in different teams of Blue Lock which requires you to go everywhere. You would also be within the auction depending on your skills of being able to market and gain a fanbase for your assigned member.

There would also be unknown observations by professional players such as Chris Prince, and Noal Noe, etc. It is to see how you are treating everyone else on the team regardless if they are your assigned member or not. It is the grade of your social skills. There is also the opportunity of being recruited to be on international management teams, especially if you can handle their egoist players such as Micheal Kaisier even the blue lock members such as Shoei Barou or Ryusei Shido.

You also be scouted for member who is troublesome such as Sae Itoshi.

Imagine 1

Imagine 2

#blue lock x reader #blue lock x y/n #blue lock x you #blue lock imagines #blue lock #bllk x reader #bllk x you #bllk x y/n #bllk imagines #manager y/n #manager reader #manager!reader x blue lock #blue lock manager!reader

111 notes · View notes

sanaexus · 7 months ago

Text

social's as chigiri's girlfriend

-liked kuniisuke, nagi.seishiro and 155.6k others

yourusername: he lets me touch his hair i win losers

tagged: chigi.who

kuniisuke: yeah but i'm the one who he kicks balls with ↳hiyori: MATE. NO. ↳yourusername: yeah and i'm the one playing with his balls ↳karasu_tabito: okay what the fuck ↳chigi.who: not true please don't trust her ↳eita.otoya: you sure ab that princess? ↳yourusername: ew don't you have enough bitches already?

nikkoki: he looks so tired of you in the second picture ↳yourusername: YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE HIM WHAT ↳nikkoki: exactly. his annoyance radiates off the picture ↳yourusername: go back to crying like a lil wuss or something

user1: i love your eyelashes ↳yourusername: i love you ↳chigi.who: no you don't ↳yourusername: i'm a free independent woman with my own free will ↳chigi.who: icecream if you shut up ↳yourusername: ok ↳karasu_tabito: so you just buy her silence? ↳chigi.who: yes ↳yourusername: HE LETS ME TOUCH HIS HAIR TOO SO HONESTLY I'M WINNING ↳karasu_tabito: valid

kenyu.yukimiya: what the fuck is he doing in the first picture? ↳chigi.who: can't you see? ↳chigi.who: oh wait no nevermind he actually can't ↳yourusername: THAT'S SO RUDE?? SAY SORRY ↳chigi.who: i'm sorry that you're blind as a bat i guess ↳kenyu.yukimiya: fuck you

mikka.kaiser: why is everyone fucking everyone in this comment section ↳alexis.ness: could be us? ↳isaichii: no one's fucking

-liked by megubachi, reo.miikage and 163.9k others

yourusername: in a world full of boys he's a gentleman (the last image is me n him)

tagged: chigi.who

chigi.who: no that is not us what the fuck. ↳yourusername: aww hyo don't be shy ↳chigi.who: you like playing w my hair right? ↳yourusername: no i'm sorry+ i love you+ don't remove my hair touching privilege + i'm js a girl + don't be a hater

megubachi: the last image is canon (i was the chair) ↳yourusername: my real one fr ↳isaichii: bavjura i didrn except tjis frmo yoi ↳rin.itoshi: what ↳yourusername: "bachira i didn't expect this from you" ↳megubachi: you're still my number one ↳isaichii: sorry guys kaiser was chasing me around like a mad maniac ↳mikka.kaiser: come to papa ↳reo.miikage: what the fuck

nikkoki: was the last picture really necessary? ↳yourusername: are you really necessary ↳isaichii: throwback to the time when someone asked chigiri if his haircare was necessary and without any hesitation he went "are you really necessary" ↳shiidoryu: dk ab that but i can throw a back ↳chigi.who: did it once and i'll do it again

user2: you should date me instead i'll let you touch my hair ↳yourusername: oh emm gee let's go on a date to the park and we'll terrorize kids tgt !! ↳user2: ofc bae ↳chigi.who: i am that kid because what the fuck . ↳yourusername: 🙁 ↳chigi.who: ew ↳yourusername: BEO YOU BETTER FUCKING SLEEP WITH A EYE OPEB I'M GONNA FUCKING CHOP OFF YOU'RE HAIR STEAL YOUR SISTER AND THAN LIKE DRAW IN YOUR FACE ↳mikka.kaiser: bro* an* open* your* then* on* ↳shiidoryu: SHUT UP CAN YOU NOT ENJOY THE DRAMA W/O BEING AN GEEK FOR 2 MINUTES ↳alexis.ness: it's a geek and don't talk to kaiser like that you good for nothing zesty butt loving horny demon ↳itoshi_sae: please help he keeps touching my butt ↳shiidoryu: you're into that bae 😘

-liked by julian.loki, oliver.aiku and 211.5k others

chigi.who: i actually act like a normal boyfriend

tagged: yourusername

julian.loki: just how broad is normal in this situation? ↳yourusername: broader than yo mom ↳julian.loki: .. ↳julian.loki: ok i kinda maybe sorta might have laughed ↳yourusername: normal can mean pushing me off a swing or fighting w a 7 year old who was rude to me btw ↳oliver.aiku: bro got bullied by a 7 year old ↳yourusername: you got cooked by a guy who does puzzles btw ↳oliver.aiku: bye

yourusername: i'm spiderman (REAL NOT CLICKBAIT 3AM CHALLENGE GONE WRONG 🙀🙀😱😱💯💯) ↳rin.itoshi: weren't you batman? ↳yourusername: shhhh that's a secret ↳megubachi: I'M BATMAN??? ↳yourusername: no but you can be hello kitty ↳megubachi: deal

nagi.seishiro: how much we betting y/n fell of the roof on her ass ↳yourusername: RUDE !! I HOPE CHOKI DIES ↳nagi.seishiro: not cool dude :x ↳chigi.who: she did in fact actually fall on her ass ↳yourusername: ihy ↳chigi.who: not what you were saying last night ↳yourusername: I'M STILL A MINORR ↳eita.otoya: TRYNA STRIKE A CORD AND IT'S PROLLY A MINORRR ↳mikka.kaiser: drake fr got cooked ↳yourusername: so did you ↳karasu_tabito: drake x kaiser

yourusername: no but i fr love you ↳chigi.who: i know you do ↳yourusername: WOULD IT KILL TO TELL ME YOU LOVE ME BACK?? ↳chigi.who: i'm js a girl ↳kuniisuke: I FUCKING CALLED IT HE WAS TOO 💅💅 TO BE A SWEATY MAN WHO KICKED BALLS ↳reo.miikage: what ↳megubachi: wajt ↳isaichii: huh ↳hiyori: the fuck ↳mikka.kaiser: why ↳alexis.ness: what ↳eita.otoya: 💀 ↳karasu_tabito: w h a t . ↳rin.itoshi: what the actual fuck ↳shiidoryu: I FUCKING KNOW RIGHT ↳itosh_sae: no ↳barou.shoei: get help and sleep because it's 2 fucking am ↳chigi.who: :p

chigi.who: you're pretty ↳yourusername: i know

wellll that was mid asf i don't know how to write chigiri exactly if you can see but it's fine

897 notes · View notes

mcdonaldsnumberone · 2 years ago

Text

UNDERDOG!

rin knows he’s powerful: more powerful and hungrier than others.

content warning(s): formula one au, not an x-reader fic

It is in moments like these that Rin swears the entire world comes to a standstill.

Before reality can even sink in, his body responds to everything. His blood roars in his ears, and his heart rate refuses to calm down. But even in this adrenaline-riddled state, Rin has never felt so clear-minded before. His inhales and exhales are steady and rhythmic, and his hands don’t even shake once as he drives his car to the winner’s podium and parks it above the CGI of fireworks going off underneath him.

It also fully doesn’t sink in when he’s clambering out of the car. His team is whooping and celebrating over the radio intercom, yelling all sorts of things that his ears don’t register at all. Rin looks almost monstrous, the dark aura radiating off of him in waves as he hoists him over the safety bar of his race car. He feels the thick of it himself. It’s like everything his eyes register is moving in slow motion, and he’s just a spectator caught in the midst of the busyness. His lips are parched when he stands on top of the car to face the endless seas of faces, cameras, and smartphones all directed at him.

But he can’t hear any of it. The flashes in his eyes from the audience are like the stars in the sky. They’re distant and foggy.

He doesn’t even feel giddy. All he feels is the tension in his body, coursing through his honed muscles. His teal eyes pierce through the aquamarine colorscape of his helmet. His entire face remains hooded and masked save for his eyes. It’s good humor for him to take it off and to greet his fans, to be courteous and sportsmanlike, but Rin doesn’t want to. He doesn’t know if it’s shame or a kind of gleeful sadism that forces him to keep his helmet glued onto him, his number and company emblazoned over it. Barely anybody can catch how inhuman he looks when he’s covered from head-to-toe in his helmet and uniform, the crowd distracted by screaming and cheering for him, but Rin knows that he resembles more of a beast than a human in that instant.

He’s done it. He’s won the Grand Prix. On his debut race, no less.

(“Itoshi Rin, younger brother of the favored Ferrari champion, to make his Formula One debut!” The news reports and social media posts all blared the same headlines. “Can the younger Itoshi live up to the hype of Itoshi Sae?”

Rin almost crushed his phone in his hand. He had never felt this kind of rage consume him before in a long while, not since he had first made the decision to become a Formula One driver. Everyone called him crazy and stupid for it, for throwing himself so wholeheartedly into such a risky sport, but Rin was never one to listen.

Rin trained like his life fucking depended on it. The moment he opened his eyes, he was forcing his sleep-logged body to the garage, stuffing himself into his uniform and revving his car to life. Rain or shine, day or night, he’d run the track until the asphalt was branded with the scorching hot skids of his tires. It wasn’t until the smell of fire and gas stuffed his nose that he even thought about taking a break, and it wasn’t until the team literally had to drag him out of the car that he stopped his practice. And much to their dismay, the moment they let their guard down around him, he’d be running for his car as if he was addicted.

Maybe he was. He wouldn’t put himself past it.

Too much practice would only mean that the car would fall apart, they scolded him. But Rin understood the underlying message. It would kill him too.

He didn’t fucking care. None of this was enough. He locked himself in the training rooms, constantly running racing simulations over and over until his eyes were red and bloodshot. While other champions giggled about their hobbies during interviews or relished the wealth their salaries brought, Rin lived and breathed racing.

No matter how much his manager pleaded with him to not overdo it or how much his company rebuked him for abandoning all common sense even before he got to his debut race, all Rin cared about was being better. So he raced, over and over, on the track and off of it, making sure that complete and utter victory was the only outcome he would reach.

He needed to. Ever since that scumbag of an older brother abandoned him and ran off to make a contract with Ferrari, all Rin ever cared about was ripping Sae to shreds. Flesh from bone, champion from podium, he wanted his brother as good as dead.

“You’re being unreasonable, Itoshi!” His manager had gasped, face morphing into pure fear towards Rin as he emerged from his qualifying race. “You’re… not acting right. I know racing means a lot to you, but nobody should be acting like this!”

Pole position. Best qualifying time. Better than Sae, better than anybody else. Having the best time meant that he would be first position tomorrow during the actual race. Even if it wasn’t much and anything in Formula One could change at the flip of a coin, as long as he could beat Sae, that was all that mattered.

Rin ignored his manager, walking past with nothing but a starved, depraved anger scrawled all over his face. He was going to win. It didn’t matter if this was his first race or not. If there were more experienced drivers. If there were more favored cars. He was going to win, even if it meant putting his life on the line.

He was hungry.)

His chest rises and falls as he stands on top of his car, eyes drinking in the sight of everything around him. The checkered flag waves for him and him only, and everyone in the seats that had been underestimating him are all coming to terms with the realization that this fresh-faced boy has uprooted all of the projected winners in one fell swoop.

But that isn’t what grounds him the most. When Rin cranes his neck behind him to see the other racers trickling in, it is the aftermath of his cruelty that brings the world back to him.

The other companies’ cars and drivers slowly emerge behind him. Some of the drivers refuse to meet his eyes, too prideful to properly admit that a boy nearly half their age could best them as if it were nothing. All the experience under their belt dissolved like sugar in warm water when it came to Rin’s raw ambition. Some looked at him with horror written over their pale lips and sunken cheeks, the revelation that a new generation of drivers filled to the brim with an unparalleled craving for victory was here to uproot them all.

“What a demon, that Itoshi Rin!” The sports commentators scream. “He’s gone and done it! The boy that Mercedes managed to bring out from the dust, the one that had all the odds stacked against him! On his first race! He’s managed to beat out all the champions and take first place! What a kickoff to the season!”

God, Rin wishes they would shut up. It was just hours ago that they were all harping about his downfall, snickering amongst themselves about how he was too young to know anything and that his company was making a losing bet by putting so much on him.

“And how hideously he destroys!” They chirp up again, laughing in disbelief. “Those sharp turns, the brutal brakes… No wonder he’s thrown the entire racing world in a frenzy! I’ve never seen a driver so aggressive and so ready to tear apart everybody else on the track!”

Rin sees it too. He sees it in his reflection. The way the whites of his eyes seem to be swirling into black, his teal pupils blown wide open as if he’s taken some kind of drug he shouldn’t have. He’s sent everyone scrambling for mercy, leaving opponents spinning off of the race track and devouring everyone in his path.

But he doesn’t care about all the second-rate champions that sob and wail at his feet. All he cares about is the sleek, fiery red Ferrari car that parks itself right behind Rin’s car. The world spins around sideways, dangerously, when Rin sees a gloved hand reach out and grab the safety bar, and before Rin can even fully turn himself around to face his older brother, Itoshi Sae is hoisting himself out of his vehicle.

The look on Sae’s face is indecipherable. Sae stands on the ground and looks up placidly at Rin, who stands above him on top of his Mercedes car. The redhead’s lips are pressed into a thin line, and his normally well-maintained hair is tousled and thrown all around, like the embers of a dying fire.

Rin can’t make out his older brother’s voice, but through the visor of his helmet, he sees Sae’s lips move.

“So you’ve gone and won, Rin,” Sae speaks, his voice drowned out by the shrieking crowds pressing all up against the partition rails. “I never thought I’d see you making that face again.”

Rin’s heart leaps to his chest when Sae turns around and walks off. Not even with Sae placing second does the older Itoshi brother stick around for the celebrations. Rin doesn’t know how to respond when he sees Sae’s retreating back disappear into the Ferrari garages: the very scene being the material of his dreams.

He’s done it. He’s won over his brother. On his debut race, no less.

And only then does it hit Rin all at once. He nearly stumbles, almost falling off of his own car, but he grips his head as the rush and the endorphins come crashing down on him. He struggles to breathe, as everything knocks into his chest and squeezes the oxygen out of his lungs. It hurts, and his nerves scream with overstimulation. The lights are blinding in his eyes, and everything’s too much. It pierces him, wriggles inside his body like a creature demanding to be freed, burning his organs and skin from the inside out.

But goddamn—does it feel ridiculously good.

For the first time in his life, Rin gloats. He doesn’t show it on his body, but as he properly drinks in the sight of the world being forced to acknowledge him, Rin gloats in the glory of his madness. Never before had they seen anyone like him. Never before had they come across such insanity, such raw drive to destroy and tear apart everything that’s ever been known. Never before had they encountered someone like him, so dedicated and driven to leave everything in his path engulfed in flames. The despair, the enlightenment, the drama: it was all because of him, and it was all for him to take.

Defeating Sae wasn’t going to be enough. Rin knew this much, his eyes narrowing sharply under his helmet. Winning over him was only the beginning, and this was just one battle out of many he would win. The war still was yet to be fully won.

Rin wouldn’t be satisfied until he utterly destroyed Sae. Until his older brother would be nothing more than the shell of the person he used to be, where not even his shining reputation as Ferrari’s prodigy could save him. Rin swore that he would make it so that Sae couldn’t even think about driving without being grief-stricken at what Rin had stolen from him, destroying everything his older brother had built up until none of it would remain. He would make Sae crawl to his feet and beg for mercy, and only then would Rin laugh and do away with it all.

Rin was hungry then.

But he’s so much hungrier now.

x x

#blue lock #bllk #itoshi rin #my writing #hey guys . so i might be a little mentally ill abt this au .

53 notes · View notes