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hwnglx · 1 day ago

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pick a pile - what makes you beautiful? (detailed)

hello dear reader! let's take a look into what makes you so uniquely beautiful. breathe slowly, take your time and use your intuition to go with the pile that speaks to you the most. this is a very specific reading, so it's likely that not every message will speak to everyone. remember to take what resonates, and leave what doesn't. 𓆩♡𓆪

✰ pile 1 ✰

so, this pile definitely gave me the biggest boss vibes. you have very strong energy, with so much major arcana in my spread. i can tell you are not someone to be messed with. (also kinda feel like you might parent or coddle the other piles lmao)

your beauty lies not only within your immense strength, but also in your ability to stand over situations which can appear very dark and difficult on the outside. i do believe you come with your own struggles, insecurities, doubts and fears which don't seem to always find their way to the surface; but you deal with them in such a graceful and impressive way. i can feel some people being in genuine awe of how you handle trials and tribulations. i do think you've been through certain things which have given you thicker skin. now, you know what you want and need in life, you're aware of your potential and what you can do, so even if a situation presents itself in which you find yourself in self-doubt, you believe in the power of hard work and consistency.

you don't seem like the type to dwell on your problems for too long or allow yourself to drown in self-pity, but moreso like a person who feels this desire to work on whatever troubles you. let's say if a situation presents itself to you, in which circumstances seem unfavourable; rather than complaining or remaining stuck in this hopeless place, you'll likely be the type to think about how you can change and work on your own attitude and mindset instead, in order to come out the other side in a stronger manner. you put a lot of importance into remaining confident and keeping a grip on your self-belief. since you see that as the best version of yourself. you appear to be very mature; even if your age is still young, you seem to have a wise soul and an impressingly reliable, as well as responsible nature. maybe you had to grow up quickly, you just give off this energy of someone who had to learn how to be responsible in life very early on.

considering i got both, the emperor and the empress for you, i think a lot of your beauty also lies in your duality. you're likely to have this balance of both feminine and masculine qualities inside of you. you seem to be the type of person who can be assertive, more self-centered and individualistic in some ways, like you do think it's important to focus on yourself in order to find fulfilment in this world. however this doesn't distinguish the compassionate heart you carry for other people. you're someone with an empathetic and kind nature, someone who wants to take care of the people you love.

you could make a very good parent, actually. i think you balance this sense of responsibility, dependability and solidity, with a nurturing heart, a soft and gentle core. you might be the case of someone with a hard shell but soft interior. i feel like you're the type to root for the underdog. someone who takes people under their wing, protects them from external influences. like you'd take a bullet for the people you cherish. (i do think you might be more selective in that aspect though, like you do have your boundaries straight, and wouldn't just throw your hand in the fire for anyone)

this is a random message i got; some of you also might be on the curvier side when it comes to your bodily built, and it makes you very very beautiful. like i can tell that some of pile 1's bodies are bangin! like yes sir or ma'am, go rock that bod with confidence!

another very beautiful thing about you; you do not fear getting your hands dirty. meaning, you're willing to put in the necessary hard work in life. like “if i have to personally run up this hill for several hours straight, then so be it, as long as i finally get to the top!” you aren't someone who will shy away from bearing burdens and heavy weights on your back, you understand the need to hustle in order to succeed. you can feel this need to improve yourself, put in the required effort to keep getting better at everything you do in life. not just for yourself, but also the people around you. you want to be a comfortable and stable figure in your loved one's lives.

i keep feeling like you're just this person people can lean on with no second thought; someone who will have their back no matter what. very loyal, dedicated and passionate energy within you. i'd personally love to be your friend, like i'd feel pretty lucky! i feel like you're the friend who keeps their promises, who's okay with running errands for others. you'd get things done for someone if they're unable to do so; like e.g. picking your friends up and driving them random places. maybe you're the friend at the party who holds themselves back from drinking in order to be the responsible one making sure everyone gets back home safely. you just seem to have this devotion to the ones you love, and wanting to make them feel safe, as well as cared for. you might also be a huge hype man in their lives, always cheering them on and lighting up any dark place they find themselves in. you have such bright and inspirational energy!

you carry this beautiful balance of; focusing on your own interests, ambitions, desires and goals, but also remaining considerate and caring towards the special people in your life.

✰ pile 2 ✰

oh my gawd, this pile is super cute. so, you immediately strike me as someone very independent and freedom-loving. you love to have your own space, and being able to just do whatever you want, whenever you want. i feel like you just have this very contagious and bright energy, where people might trust you to make the best out of every situation you're in. you seem like a big risk-taker, someone who doesn't fear the concept of change, and isn't afraid of starting all over again if you feel like that's necessary. you're so beautiful, in the way of just being down and ready to do things others might shy away from. you might be the person who will drag your friend out the dark and quiet room and tell them to get out, enjoy the beautiful sun on your skin, connect with mother nature, appreciate the smaller things in life and find happiness in them, because that's where true fulfilment lies. there is this very philosophical and poetic side to you. i keep feeling like you might have significant neptune/jupiter/mercury aspects.. i can just see you running through the blooming fields in this almost movie-like way. (random but do you like ghibli movies? you just give me ghibli character vibes, especially kiki's delivery service 🥹 i love that movie, it's so comforting)

you're beautiful in the way where.. you easily see beauty in the world. you seem so easily excitable, and count all the blessings you have in life. i feel like you're the type to find something positive in everything and everyone. random, but you might love photography, and taking pictures of almost everything around you, just because you can see art in anything or any place. you love exploring new places, new cultures, understanding and learning about people or things completely different to what you're used to. you might like to travel, because you enjoy this thought of getting insight into entirely new lifestyles. you're very open-minded.

you aren't worried about leaving toxic people or situations behind if you feel like they just keep you in a negative place. it's kinda giving been there done that. i think you consciously reject negativity now because you're not at that same place anymore, and especially don't want to be anymore. you're so overly protective of your peace now, because you had to deal with so many tribulations, and took so much on the chin from life in order to get to this place of inner peace. you don't allow anyone to take it away from you anymore.

you also don't seem afraid to completely transform. maybe you even enjoy transforming yourself physically, like you love reinventing yourself and can find your identity in things like your fashion. you enjoy expressing your unique nature in that way. i also just feel like you're such a pleasure to be around, people likely just enjoy your presence because it makes them feel like everything will be okay. did anyone ever tell you about how your presence is therapeutic to them? if not, some people might think that without openly expressing it.

i do think you can be very emotional too, which is another beautiful trait of yours. you might be the type to tear up rather easily, i think your interior is very squishy and sweet. you wear your heart on your sleeve in this beautiful and special way. you not being afraid to express your emotions (although sometimes they can just take over you unintentionally lmao dw i relate..) makes you so extraordinary, it gives you this unique light and glow. don't ever lose grip on this wonderful side of you. don't ever feel ashamed of it, and don't allow anyone to make you think you're anything but beautiful for your passion! i feel like you genuinely care about the world, and everything that it involves. your energy is just so pure and innocent in a way, even if you yourself don't see yourself that way. your intentions and heart read as very sweet.

in addition, your beauty lies in your ability to see opportunity of growth in whatever life throws at you. like pile 1, i do believe you have had to deal with your fair share of challenges in life, but this lead to you being able to see how.. even situations that might look awful from an outsiders perspective, can serve you as a learning lesson. “what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.”

again, you're just so philosophical! i feel like we could just sit down together and discuss life for hours, in such a deep and intriguing manner. you seem to have a lot of understanding of the different complexities of life, just because you've experienced a lot of situations in which you had to adapt or adjust. so there's this natural know-how here, it's almost like you're not scared of life's upheavals anymore. you didn't let it discourage you at the time, so best believe it will not bring you down at this point in time. you're so youthful and almost childlike in spirit, but carry a deep sense of knowledge about life. like some other people might turn all bitter if they went through what you have been through, but you remained soft and sweet in this harsh world, which is such a beautiful trait to have! i sincerely applaud you, and hope you can never lose this truly wonderful spark inside of you.

✰ pile 3 ✰

oh, this pile seems so genuinely nice, but i can sense some struggle here too.. first of all, you read as a very humble and down to earth person. like i truly can't sense a single ounce of arrogance inside of you. you feel like you're an eternal student of life, continuously learning with every experience, and growing endlessly. you give off this energy of someone who's always so eager to expand your skills and knowledge on things. especially if you get hooked on something like a fun hobby, you're just so ambitious and approach the learning process with this modest, but determined attitude. you seem quite capable of dealing with constructive criticism, and take it as a way to further better yourself. like yes tell me what i did wrong, so i can improve. definitely a very hard-working and earnest energy within you.

you're so beautiful, because you live and lead with this sense of compassion and acceptance inside of you. you seem to have high emotional intelligence; as well as a lot of empathy for others. you're the type of person to.. hold this cup filled with love, in a crowd full of people fighting each other. while other people are overly competitive and at each other's throats to win over the other, you seem like the one who prefers seeing everyone as equally worthy of praise, equally lovable, equally deserving of respect. i truly don't see you enjoying to put yourself above others, simply because you don't see why you would want to. like i don't think you fully understand this need to argue and cause problems with others, it irks you.

you even might put other people's needs above yours almost naturally, it seems to come very easy to you. (did some of you grow up with a lot of siblings? i feel like there's this natural tendency to supress not only your own desires, but also your own emotions a lot.. i feel like you might've found yourself in plenty of situations where you needed to swallow your pride, bite your tongue, ignore your own emotions or grant others chances you yourself might've wanted.) you might be the type to politely hold the door open for people even though your arm hurts, offer the seat to the elderly even though you yourself are exhausted, allow your friend to grab the opportunity although you might need it just as much.

i do feel like you're quite peace-loving, and don't enjoy arguments at all. you seem excellent at approaching conflicts and problems in, not only this calm and collected manner, but also with this diplomatic and tender sense of understanding towards all parties. do you have any major libra placements? i can sense this beautifully non-judgemental energy in you, where you always seek harmony, no matter what situation you find yourself in. you also just seem balanced in general, and like not much can tick you off. some people might even ask you “how are you always so calm?” although i feel like you can experience feelings quite intensely once they take over you (i feel like you might cry a lot when you're on your own..) you just don't enjoy openly displaying your emotions, and might have problems expressing them outwardly. again, i keep feeling like this likely stems from a deeply rooted place, maybe you've just naturally aquired this mechanism within you, where you shut off your emotions and internalize them a lot.

you might put a lot of thought into how others view you, might dislike the thought of anyone looking at you as overly dramatic. you also seem pretty perfectionistic, especially in closely managing the way you're perceived by people, or the way you treat people. you might often fear doing them wrong, or overstepping any boundaries. i can sense an avoidance of expressing or asserting yourself strongly again here, because you just don't want anyone to feel like you're doing too much. (i know this is a reading that focuses more on positives, but spirit is telling me this selflessness in you makes you immensely beautiful.. maybe you even have a lot of egocentric people around you, therefore your kindness just stands out even more. don't lose that sincere heart you have for others, however; you need to listen to what you yourself want more as well <3 learn to balance these two sides in you out, because if not, others might take advantage of you)

i do think though, that a lot of this calmness might be a result of your maturity. it's interesting because on the one hand you can feel like the young student who still believes they have so much to learn from life, but at the same time, you do have a lot of valuable advice to give to people, just because you might relate to a lot of the things others go through. you seem amazing at putting yourself in someone else's shoes, i can feel people thinking you're a great listener.

i just feel like your unique beauty lies in this gentle, pleasant and mild energy you bring to the table. you'd be the type of person i could tell my deepest darkest secrets to comfortably, and i feel like you wouldn't mutter a word to anybody. like your friends probably can tell you the wildest sht they've done, without any embarrassment. or call you at any given moment, and you'd be there to listen to their angry rants or rages, and just take it all in quietly.

#kpop tarot #pac reading #pac #tarot reading #tarot community #tarot #personal reading #pick a card #pick a pile #pick a card reading

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jji-lee · 2 days ago

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dreamies if they weren’t idols ~*

this is all imaginary stuff from my imagination , i went by some of the things they're mentioned irl but idk i kinda let my imagination run wild LMAO , requested here !

mark , by the age of 31 he's a children's book author with a happy family

being artistic in that way is just something that comes natural to mark. i specifically think he'd write children's books or those adventure novels cause his imagination is just so grand, he has so much material to just write hundreds of pages of whatever he's imagining. considering his age and religion as well i truly think he'd at least be married at this point, kids being a big thing he's planning on soon! his lockscreen is a pic of his partner and kid, he's so full of love in the life he's living. ~* didn't finish college but majored in english , living in canada

renjun , by the age of 30 he's a small business owner who is actively dating

i genuinely think renjun would own like a little art business selling art supplies and little pieces he's created. Whether it's clay, paint, or markers renjun is good at using and selling them. I think romantically he'd do a lot of dating I don't know why by I feel like men or woman he's likes the feeling of getting some loving, he'd settle down eventually but he likes to date all different types of people before landing on the one. renjun's life is full of color and that gives him peace. ~* got a masters in art for fun , living in china

jeno , by the age of 30 he's working on cars and thinking about marriage

anything that has to do with cars, whether it's auto repair, design, engineering he's just into cars. i feel like he'd enjoy learning all about cars so that he's able to work with them in every way. he's the guy they always call at the auto shop because he knows everything. lets be real... jeno is hot as fuck and there's no way he'd be single by 30. I think he's the type to wait for a deepened bond in order to consider marriage and by 30 i think he'll finally feel ready to give it his all. loves his girl and his cars and nothing makes him happier than when they're together. is the type to let his partner decorate their passenger side. ~* did trade school for auto engineering , living in korea

haechan , by 30 is a pretty house husband with kids

idc. haechan loves kids and he wants to get on that asap. it took him a while to find the one (i think he's super picky) but when he found them that was it for him. he'd find any possible way to get as many kids as he can in a short period of time, but because of his partner he stopped at 3 kids LMAO. i think he'd be content with the feeling of being a caregiver and he gives sugar baby vibes srry. but he always has dinner ready, the house cleaned, and the babies showered. he loves that he gets to show his love for his partner in that way and at the same time have free time i follow any hobby he chooses. is the designated parent to sing the lullabies ofc. ~* didn't finish college cause he had a kid , was majoring in music theory , living in korea

jaemin , by 30 he's dr. na the cat dad

i think that jaemin is super flirty and romantic but i don't think he's seriously considering a family yet. he's taken a lot of his youth studying for his career so he's built more bonds as friendships instead of romantic ones. he's literally dr. dreamy and all the nurses are in love with him, but he's more than happy going home to his baby kitties. he does have close friends though that keep an eye on him because he's the type to really get into his work and just lose himself and go MIA. it's a hard life but jaemin is content with the fruits of his labor. ~* got a medical degree and did his residency to be a surgeon , living in korea

chenle , by 29 he's a sports media manager in love with the game (ifykwim)

i think chenle loves basketball but going pro didn't really work out with him, so i feel like he'd turn to media management, loving the idea of being with the team and campaigning for his favorite team. he's bossy and he runs the place so the players take him seriously, maybe even sometimes more than their coach. romantically i genuinely think chenle is a little shit. everyone wants him (insane face card) but he likes the game, being with one or the another to have some fun, but by 29 i don't think he's looking to fully commit. ~* double majored in communications and management , lives in the states maybe somewhere hot

jisung, by 28 he's on his way to the moon !

he's finally gotten his astronaut certification and he's so ready to get to work. he literally cried every year studying late nights and training for his job but when he puts on his suit it is so worth it. he definitely needed a push to get through the 10 years of becoming an astronaut and he got that push from his very special partner. he met them at the start of college and it has just been a sweet romance since. every time he wanted to give up they were there to remind him everything he worked for. can he bring his partner to the moon to propose? ~* has a masters degree in a random science major and 2 years of an internship , went to d.c to be with NASA, misses his mom but is now known as andy.

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werevampiwolf · 1 day ago

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Also, people can change from how they were raised. My parents are low-key white supremacists (low-key in that they'd say they weren't if you asked, but if you read them some talking points with no context, they'd agree with them). Consequently, I had to unlearn a lot of things once I got old enough to understand what was going on (and was allowed to access outside information, because I was kept extremely sheltered and isolated for most of my childhood). I did need people to give me some level of patience and space to possibly mess up as I learned. I'm not talking about saying the N-word or something; that's not something I ever liked. I'm talking like "wow, you're really pretty for a [insert thing here] girl" or asking to touch someone's 4C hair. I wasn't taught as a small child that that was rude, and was actually taught that things that were a lot more "macro" than microagressions were okay, so I had to learn where the line is. I like to think that I would have still powered through in learning not to be how I was raised if people were constantly jumping down my throat for every little thing, even though I was trying my best, but I can't actually say that for sure. I'm only human, after all, and I was just a teenager at that.

(I'm not exaggerating on what my parents are like, either. My parents made me promise when I was 8 (in 2004) that I would never date or marry outside my (white) race, and my parents still defended that the last time I brought it up, because "no one wants mixed babies.")

And I'm also a disabled trans queer who's also a leftist, and the only person I've ever been in a relationship with was mixed race. You obviously can date a person of color and still be racist though (also see "i have a black friend"), but my point is that even though I didn't keep the agreement, I can't change the fact that I did still make that agreement in the first place. Though I don't blame myself too much for that particular incident because I was 8; I wasn't even really conceptualizing dating in anything but the broadest of strokes yet (and I ended up being demi ace). Also, I really wouldn't have had the option to refuse, and doing so would have put me in danger. I didn't know it at the time, but my mother had already planned to kill me a few years prior for being "difficult" (AKA having autism that they refused to let me get diagnosed with). I'm pretty sure the only reason she didn't was because she wasn't sure she'd be able to overpower me without help from my dad, since I was always big and strong for my age, and my mother has had a severe back injury my entire life.

This isn't just a me patting myself on the back either. My point is that people can actually change, but you do need to let them. You don't have to forgive them, but no one is ever going to get better if they feel like they're not allowed to. They may be taking a real risk by even considering "disloyalty". You think neo-nazi groups let you just walk away and become a leftist without a fight? They don't. And even if they're not putting themselves in physical danger, it's still very isolating to leave behind your friends and family and start over. (I never had to leave a neo-nazi group, though I know someone who did, but I have experienced the isolation from leaving everything behind.)

Just... try and be patient with those who are fighting with you, who are still learning but are trying their best.

Never forget that acceptance of far-right ideals (ie tradwives, terfs, casual racism) in liberal spaces is a huge part of why today’s radicalization is so widespread and unquestioned

#i no longer require more patience than anyone else because I've learned a lot #and leftist infighting isn't going to make me turn away #but I'm well into my journey #if i was still in the beginning then i might have turned back in that instance #it's fucked up but it's true #i can't say either way because i didn't give up #but i could have #I'm only human

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peachhcs · 2 days ago

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https://www.tumblr.com/peachhcs/766163417530875904/httpswwwtumblrcompeachhcs765958548506198016

em darling you can’t leave it like that!!!! i need to know what happened next!!

like does she eventually call him or he does he just show up because he so worried and can’t stand being so far not knowing what wrongs with his girl.

i lowkey feel like he can’t even be mad after he hears her reasoning and hates that samy is still learning to trust him because he screwed up if anything it makes him want to keep working on gaining her trust fully back

please and thank you :)

part 6 i think??? this is my new favorite side plot going on 😌 also yes small cliff hanger it’s my favorite thing to do. also if u didn’t know samy’s middle name is poppy and i think it’s cute to make luke call her pop sometimes :)

au masterlist

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 7

will woke up the next morning with the immediate thought to check his phone. he scanned though all of his notifications, hoping and hoping there was at least one from samy or luke, but when the blonde saw nothing his heart sank.

she hates him. she forgot about him. she doesn’t care.

he started spiraling, a cloud of anxiety forming over his head, but will tried knocking some sense into himself. there was a chance she was just busy getting tests and results back. she might be with her parents, or on her way home? she was caught up in all of it, she just hadn’t called yet.

that was understandable. yeah. she wasn’t ignoring him because why would she? he was her best friend. her boyfriend. they literally grew up together and told one another everything.

will tried shaking himself from the dark thoughts as he pushed himself out of bed and made his best attempt to get ready for practice and the rest of the day. maybe she’d call when he was at practice!

he just needed to think positive.

will did what he could to distract his mind as he went through his usual morning routine. he brushed his teeth listening to some music, washed his face, sort of did his hair, and then went downstairs to figure out what was for breakfast.

patrick and christina were already downstairs along with the younger boys running around getting ready for school. the two glanced over at the blonde, trying to read his expression.

“hi will, how are you?” christinia wondered.

“i’m fine. doing fine,” will nodded, but he didn’t really sound convincing. patrick and his wife exchanged a glance.

“any updates?” patrick dared to ask.

“um, no. not yet,” will shook his head, his lips forming into a tight-lipped smile.

“i’m sure she’s just talking with the doctors and getting discharged and settling back into home,” christina assured, rubbing the younger boy’s shoulder like he was her own son.

“yeah, i know. that’s what i’m thinking,” will nodded, moving further into the kitchen to grab a bite to eat before he needed to pick up macklin. he needed to busy his mind or else it would be the only thing will would think about all day.

the marleau’s watched in slight worry, but they knew not to push too far. they knew will could handle himself and samy would call soon. the hockey player rushed out of the house in a quick goodbye, climbing into his car and driving off without a second thought. the ride was silent besides the soft hum of the radio playing and when he pulled up to his friend’s place he braved a smile.

“morning,” macklin mumbled, tired and dreary-eyed like he just woke up ten minutes ago. will nodded, pulling back onto the road towards the rink.

the silence wasn’t unusual for them. usually, it was pretty silent on their rides in because of how early it was and how little sleep they got the night before. macklin didn’t say a lot and neither did will which he was glad for because the blonde wasn’t sure if he’d be able to take the million questions macklin sometimes had for him.

“hey, did you hear anything more from samy? is she doing okay?” shit. there it was. the brunette’s curious gaze slid to will’s.

“uh, she had to get surgery on her shoulder. a tendon tear or something,” will swallowed thickly.

“oh, shit. that fucking sucks. is she doing alright? i’m sure that’s gotta put her out for awhile. i texted with her for a bit last night just to see how she was but she never told me that. wow,” macklin didn’t notice the way will’s grip on the steering wheel whitened his knuckles nor the way his jaw clenched.

how many more people were gonna tell him they talked to his girlfriend before he even did?

“you were texting her?” will couldn’t help the anger in his voice.

“yeah, just wanted to check in after seeing that hit. it was brief, but she said she was doing alright and i said i was sorry that happened and i hope she bounced back soon. she hearted the message,” macklin explained their entire exchange and even though it wasn’t even a lot, it made something stir in the blonde.

“so she can text my fucking teammate and not call me?” will huffed under his breath which macklin did catch this time.

“what?”

“she hasn’t said a word to me.”

“wait, what do you mean she hasn’t said a word to you? you just said she had to get surgery,” the younger brunette became confused.

“because i learned all of that from her brother. samy hasn’t called or texted me since it happened,” the anger didn’t disappear from will’s voice.

“seriously? you’re her boyfriend. why wouldn’t she call you?”

“i don’t know, you tell me man. i don’t really know what i did wrong or why she won’t talk to me. i’ve been trying to reach her since last night,” will finally cooled off a bit, but his grip on the steering wheel didn’t.

“well, shit. i’m sorry, i didn’t know that. maybe she’ll call while you’re at practice or something. i’m sure she means to there’s just a lot on her mind.”

“yeah, sure,” will wanted to believe that but he couldn’t after hearing how she’s spoken to everyone but him.

meanwhile, in boston, luke was sitting in samy’s room with her after their parents asked him to bring something up for her from the cafeteria. the siblings were sitting in silence, luke texting on his phone and samy just staring the wall. her mind was clouded with calling will—something she still hadn’t done yet.

finally, the older hughes brother caught onto his sister’s quietness. he lifted his gaze and noticed the way she stared off into space and waved his hand in front of her.

“hey, earth to samy?” the girl snapped out of her daze.

“huh?”

“you okay? you look..worse than i would expect you to look after breaking your shoulder,” luke raised his eyebrow at his wording making her roll her eyes.

“i’m fine,” samy mumbled.

“why do you lie every time you’re keeping something from me? you know i can tell every single time, right?” luke rolled his eyes this time.

“just got a lot on my mind, luke,” his sister grumbled.

“seriously, what’s up? if it’s about mom and dad you know i won’t tell. not anymore at least,” the curly-haired boy chuckled to himself thinking he was way too amusing while samy didn’t find any of it funny.

“it’s not about them. it’s nothing, i promise,” she tried getting him off her back.

the girl’s phone buzzed in her lap where her lock screen lit up. the two saw the picture of her and will as her background and then it quickly clicked in luke’s head.

“have you talked to him?”

samy’s silence was his answer.

“c’mon, pop. you know you can talk to me. i’m not gonna judge you or whatever,” luke’s tone fell softer, pulling out the nickname he only called her since they were kids.

“i want to call him, but i just can’t. i..i can’t do it.”

“why not? did something happen between you two again?”

“no, but that’s the problem. i’m worried something will happen—like i’ll burden him or some shit. or like..i’ll run him out again by relying on him for everything when i shouldn’t or don’t need to. i just..i didn’t wanna burden him with this knowing i’m fine and he has hockey to worry about,” the tears fell faster than samy could stop then or even process that she was really crying now—harder than when she talked with ryan and gabe yesterday.

luke’s face fell. he hated seeing his baby sister so upset, so he reached his arms out to gently wrap around her frame for a hug. he didn’t say anything, just letting her cry it out and feel all the emotions.

they stayed like that for another good minute before samy finally pulled away. she embarrassingly wiped her eyes from her tears while luke just rubbed her knee.

“i’m sorry. this is so stupid,” the brunette laughed dryly—her poor attempt at humor.

“hey, don’t apologize. this isn’t stupid. you’re allowed to cry,” luke reassured her.

“i just don’t know why i can’t just call him. maybe it’s the pity i hate? or that i know he’d offer to fly out and drop anything but i don’t want him to do that just for me,” samy rambled some more while her brother just listened and nodded.

“can i be honest with you, pop?” the older boy wondered and samy nodded.

“i think you’re scared to let people care deeply for you and about you. you know how much will cares about you and i think that scares you. especially since he also hurt you,” luke kept an even tone, but his expression was soft. “if i know anything about will it’s that i know how much he loves you. he’d do anything for you and yes, i know it’s scary knowing how much someone cares about you to do that. however, you’re not a burden. you’re not gonna run him out. you’re not gonna annoy him. he loves you and he genuinely cares about you, i promise.”

luke’s words made samy cry harder. she buried her face in her hand, the tears pouring from her eyes all while the older hughes did his best to comfort her.

“what if he breaks up with me again because i didn’t call him right away?” now there was a whole new wave of anxieties to worry about.

“he is not going to do that. if he does, i’ll fly to san jose myself and punch him, but he won’t. i’m sure he’s waiting to hear from you and has been since yesterday afternoon,” luke nudged her good arm and nodded towards her phone. “it’s okay to let people in, pop. it means they care about you. i know it’s scary to trust again, but even i admit to how much that boy loves you and would do anything to gain your trust back.”

samy sucked in a deep breath as she found will’s contact again. she looked at luke who nodded before finally hitting call.

will’s phone vibrated by his leg. he was geared up for practice when he saw samy’s contact light up on his lock screen. the blonde’s heart quickly beat as he scrambled to answer it, stepping further away from the boys still getting ready.

“hello?” he breathed.

“will?” a wave of relief washed through him when he heard samy’s familiar voice on the other end.

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warblogs17282 · 23 hours ago

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So, I've been thinking about the stuff that ghostfuckers told us about Millie, and I got curious and wondered if what we learned about her there could be used to put things shown in the first short and unhappy campers into perspective a bit more.

Hell's Belles:

Some comments from Sallie May interested me, mainly the lines "for your fancy job." and "shiny new life", and there's a line in ghostfuckers I think I can tie into Sallie May generally describing Millie's job and life positively.

That being, "Most of my life I bought into the idea that all I could ever be was a simple farm girl. Or best an underpaid goon.", and I suspect that Sallie May is still affected by this stereotype, that she feels like she's also a part of that stereotype, considering that we know that she helps out at her parent's ranch.

Which would explain part of the reason why Sallie May calls it 'fancy' and 'shiny', because she may feel like Millie is a notable exception to the stereotype, which would obviously be something that she would describe positively, especially considering that job and life now also consists of killing humans, something that is very much a one of a kind thing. Considering that Millie bought into the stereotype before joining Blitz, it's very probable that Sally May also bought into the same/similar stereotype.

Obviously this is only part of the reason why she describes Millie's job and life like she does, but I still feel like ghostfuckers adds more depth to that statement.

Another thing that I want to mention is the fact that they did some playfighting at the end of the episode, which I think ties into this line in ghostfuckers: "We're just Wrathians, Blitzo. Muscle. It's all we're good for, all I'm good for."

Another stereotype, that all Wrathians are good for is muscle, and fighting is a good way of building muscle, which would help to explain why they just naturally fell into playfighting at the end of the episode, because it's implied that they had playfights like this a lot with each other, and considering the stereotype of that all Wrathians are good for is muscle, it makes sense why they have such a history of playfighting with each other, because again, if Millie believed that stereotype before meeting Blitz, it's very likely that Sallie May also believed the same/similar stereotype as well.

Unhappy Campers:

Let's just skip to the boiling point of their argument in this episode, we know that Millie felt undermined during this episode, which we can see with the line "And for once, I feel like... like I'm important. Like I'm someone to be proud of...", which quite heavily plays into the line "We're just Wrathians, Blitzo. Muscle. It's all we're good for, all I'm good for.", which probably helps to explain part of the reason why Millie felt so strongly about this, just because you know that the stereotype is false doesn't mean it doesn't effect you anymore, it's clearly something that still resides in the back of Millie's head somewhere.

I use that line in particular, because there's two times in the episode before this where we can see Millie be visibly annoyed at Moxxie, and I believe that part of the reason is because she feels like her other qualities are being undermined, with the main one here being her smarts, which kind of plays into the line in ghostfuckers, that stereotype, because considering how prominent that stereotype was for her until meeting Blitz, it's not unreasonable to assume that this specific stereotype was playing in the back of her mind again, which would help to explain part of the reason why she felt so strongly about it when the argument reaches it's boiling point.

Plus, one of the first things Blitz told Millie right after he moved his business to IMP was 'You're tougher, smarter, and frankly more capable than anyone I've ever met in any ring.', showing even further why Millie feels so strongly about this, she probably feels like what Moxxie is doing is a slap in the face to what Blitz told her when they first moved to IMP for their business.

Plus, there's also other relevant lines like "Most of my life I bought into the idea that all I could ever be was a simple farm girl. Or best an underpaid goon." and "Not exactly a shortage of imp assassins in Wrath. Reputation is everything."

"And what's your reputation, hmm?"

Although these are less directly relevant to this scene, I still think it's worth considering into the big picture of why Millie felt so strongly here.

tbh, this is another reason while I'll defend the unhappy campers Moxxie and Millie conflict, it has quite a bit of depth to it if you consider everything, and I've just shown you all that ghostfuckers has given that conflict a bit more depth.

#helluva boss #helluva boss millie #moxxie helluva boss #sallie may #an in depth post from me where the focus isn't on Blitz or Stolas?#color me shocked

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suffarustuffaru · 21 hours ago

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Genuine question do you think there's a chance that Julius could be into Subaru? Because I only really hear about Subaru being into Julius when it comes to Juilsuba

(no arc 5+ spoilers in this post)

short answer: yes, i think there’s a chance. a pretty good chance. but whether you want to interpret julius as being Romantically into subaru is up to you. however theres no denying that subaru is special to julius and that julius Loves this guy.

long answer: so i will give the following disclaimer to this, which is that i can only really speak for my own interpretations of the text. for this ask i talked a bit with a few different mutuals about this (bc while i really enjoy julius and julisuba A Lot i wouldnt consider myself an Expert so—peer reviewing it is :3) but—yes im speaking for my opinions here, so in general i recommend looking over the text/media yourself to see what you think too 👍👍

and i think in general like. i wish we saw more subaru ships from the non-subaru lens of it!! :o speaking as someone whos made shippy content from both subarus pov and the other pov, while im not perfect with it either, i just think that it’s always important to get that other pov. and sometimes its kind of a forgotten part !! :< i just think its interesting 1. seeing someone fall in love from subaru, 2. getting that outside pov of subaru, and 3. it makes the dynamic truly equal to focus on the other side of it too 👍 i dont have a lot of julisuba content atm (this will change eventually) but in the past ive rambled a bit about julius’s side of julisuba in one of my….. bdsm……………… posts :3 but anyway ill summarize what i think is going on with julius’s side here:

for julius, his prim and proper knightly persona is pretty like. i get the vibe that hes really Cultivated himself into this over time, especially bc he wasnt involved with nobility until his parents died and his uncle took him in and joshua started trying to shape julius too into what he is now. julius used to be a bit of delinquent (dont know How delinquent he was exactly but just that he was) and of course theres a big switch into julius learning noble and knightly ways and norms, julius trying to keep that armor around his heart, according to subaru. it’s learned behavior and now he struggles a little taking it off. being a knight is entrenched into julius’s familial and personal values, and julius Always strives for perfection. julius seems so put together that we kinda forget he too has his flaws but similar to subaru, he can be a bit pushy, a bit oblivious, a bit reckless. looking at the world in slight rose colored tint. pushing for More. accidentally stepping over others, maybe, but striving for strength in their own ways. Greedy. they’re kindred spirits in that way.

on the flipside of that, subaru inspires imperfection out of julius. repeatedly. subaru inspires julius to get that part of him from his childhood where he was this earnest overzealous passionate little kid and let it out again instead of being prim and proper 24/7. “juli”.

julius steps in to save subaru during arc 3 also bc julius sees himself in subaru—a passionate kid who fumbles in every single direction but that heart is there, and subaru is a walking whirlwind bc unlike julius, he can’t slap a prim and proper persona over it. he wears everything on his sleeve. he’s misguided, in the wrong, but still. his Heart is a tempting sight, and it hits julius a little personally. subaru was a mirror of julius, the part of julius that julius tried to hide a little all while subaru Offends the knights and says shit like how the knights cling to their father’s names (when julius almost kinda does cling to his family name and his knightly ideals to make himself into something Bigger and Grander), but of course julius has Morals and cant let subaru get hurt to the other knights. and sacrifices his reputation in the process—

(these are from the Arc 3 interlude that shows Julius’s side of the duel aftermath)

“did you find his tarnishing of your knightly pride unforgivable to that extent”…… and of course julius readily accepting punishment 👀👀

“the very symbol of his pride as a knight”…. yeah that duel meant several things to julius, and it sets up the entirety of julisuba from here on out. julius treasures idealism—

(hooray juliemisuba crumbs!!) but… julius noting how this duel wasn’t enough to break subarus spirit 👀👀 “It would not be such a bad thing to trade swords with a fool full of idealism once more.” “As for an annoyance… perhaps he was that, a little bit.” fucking hilarious but also so true—bc julius himself is Also a fool full of idealism. naturally, he takes a liking to subaru quickly which then leads to him declaring subaru his friend in later arc 3 <3

“It is truly in Lady Emilia’s nature to cause pain in others…. That very nature is what allows her to live as nobly and beautifully as she does. I do not deign to wish her to change. Thus, all I can do is hope that she lives more righteously, more genuinely, without anything to be ashamed of.” / “Does that go for the boy, too?” / “It goes for everyone…. It is for that very reason I wield a sword.”

It goes for everyone, julius says. these are values he treasures most in himself and in others, and once he sees it in others, he finds himself drawn to them. (though def interesting how julius doesnt 100% answer ferris’s next question on subaru straightforwardly…) julius comments on emilia here, but its also like. why does julius, the upstanding picture of a knight, follow anastasia, a cutthroat business woman? (other than her being the absolute coolest and the ana camp being a whole family <3)

its bc of greed and ambition. the strive for something greater, to dedicate your life to your passions and devotions. theres a whole ss about how julius is told by ana that she wants the best knight possible and bc of his own insecurity assumes she Must mean reinhard—but no. julius is the finest knight for a reason—bc he painstakingly shapes himself to be that way. of course he sees a similar sort of trait in subaru, how subaru shapes himself to be something greater too, and julius finds himself a littleeee starry eyed. perhaps. pun intended.

anyway. this is my long winded way of saying—yeah, julius is drawn to subaru for a lot of reasons. julius quickly finds himself attached to subaru in arc 3, and subaru coaxes out julius’s imperfection while encouraging julius’s passions.

as far as i know (of course feel free to add onto this if im missing stuff), there isnt anything in canon that reads as particularly homoerotic about subaru from julius’s pov. at least not to the same level as subaru repeatedly checking out julius’s body and saying julius is oh so handsome LMFAO. (though julius’s rainbow spirits are super cool.) so i cant definitively go “julius is 100% romantically into subaru”. especially as im asexual myself so personally romance is fun to me but not always a requirement for every ship’s depiction (or at the very least i Love exploring ships having different dynamics across different iterations of them)—so this is more so me going “theyre so intimate with each other in their own ways !!! i love viewing them from multiple angles !!!” <3 but their friendship and what they have in canon is extremely good foundation for romance. and julius likes subaru a Lot!! theyve gone through quite a bit together and theres More to come !!

#hope this answers ur question well enough anon !!#rezero #re:zero #julius juukulius #natsuki subaru #ask

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clubsmarties · 1 day ago

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Eli smiled against her lips as she returned the kiss he had just given. There was no hesitation in reciprocating it. His hand cupped her face and pulled her close as he deepened the kiss for a brief moment. If this was what people called love, he wouldn't mind falling and break every bone in his body. The feeling was euphoric. Or maybe that was just Laurel. A soft chuckle escaped him as he dropped his hand and opened his eyes again to look at her. "I'm a man of many talents." His head nodded in acknowledgement. "They're the best but she's the one I watched grow up. She was the legit baby of the family. I cuddled her at night when she wouldn't settle. I think a big part of why her parents liked me was that I was the baby whisperer." Not only that but Emma understood him. Isa and Inez did too but they were different. Each sibling unlocked a hidden piece of what made Eli him. "You have a lot more hope for Chicago than I do. I think that is a nice sentiment but I think I'm done there. Visiting them is one thing but having a home, not really. That died with the parents." Again, Eli reverted to himself, the nomad having nowhere to call home. "Yes, really," he laughed. "I'd love to meet them. I am kind of curious to hear stories about you."

He felt for her but it wasn't pity. There was a longing there in her voice that told him that her mom wasn't a subject she liked going into but still would be willing to answer the question. Settling his hand over hers he smiled. "Sometimes people don't realize what type of diamond they have. They just see the dust and assume they're not worth much. Just because your mom had a harsher way to treat you doesn't mean you aren't worth it. Don't feel like you need to tone it down for me. I want you to be your unapologetic self." What he wanted her to take away from this was that he'd never make her change into something else to fit a mold she would never fit. "Mhm. I do like to learn. I like to get into something I've never done before. Cooking is one. Maybe we can come up with a new recipe."

An amused smile took over his features. "Fair enough. Drew you in." Lucky for him she even turned her head. "Pretty green eyes. I like it." Truly just because she said it. "Is that going to be your way to get my attention moving forward?" Amusement danced in his eyes as he leaned forward and chuckled thinking of the way everyone with colored eyes would turn if she did scream that out in the courtyard. "Definitely. I can't stand the heat. It makes me irritable. I don't like heatwaves." Now why did he pick Texas for his home would be something he'd never be able to explain but it felt like there was an inexplicable pull drawing him in to the blazing boot of a state.

"We can go together. Why not right? A cabin in the snow seems like we would both enjoy it." His eyebrows furrowed and a laugh was kept at bay as he realized she'd never had a real vacation. "Maybe we can change that. The winter break is coming up so why don't we head down to one of the National Parks and spend a day with nature. If you want to spend a day with me outside. I am a great nature guide." Eli slowly fanned his eyelashes and smirked. "Good to know you think nerdy is hot. Oh, you don't share is that it?"

"I might be trying to test your knowledge. See if any of those clap clap cheers stuck. Now, see that works well. I've got a few ideas on what we could do and since you're pretty confirmed to try something once then this should be easy." His mind had come up with multiple activities they could do and that already brought a smile to his face. "Company I can give. I'll bring at least one or two facts. It seems sad if there isn't something to learn." He took her hand and lead her out. Bag in the other hand and his hand holding one making sure they were locked. "Favorite color? Don't laugh but green. I like the color. It's nice and pretty. Place? Madrid. It is so vibrant. I'd love to go walk down their streets and eat their good food. You?" The shop wasn't too far from his dorm room which he was grateful for since he didn't want to keep walking so long. They reached his building and as he let go of her hand he took out his keys and opened his door for her to enter first. He dropped the bag of food on his desk, a neat pile of books and a laptop sitting on top and closed the door. 'Make yourself comfortable. If you want something to wear like a sweater take your pick. It gets cold here since I open the window. I'll be back."

He went to his closet and grabbed a blue sweater and sweats and his socks. After a five minute absence he came back out, hair outof his face and comfy clothes now on his person. "It's a thing we used to do. We don't sit with outside clothes on the bed."

Her smile couldn't be contained watching as he stood centimeters from her. Hiding how she felt and what she anticipated was not possible in any way or form. Laurel's eyes fluttered shut upon feeling those soft, lovely lips she had been hooked on from the start. "High praise, and you say I'm the one with the flirting skills," she teased, her hands cupping his face before pulling him in for a kiss of her own. The last two have been initiated by him, it was high time she give one to him. It's all she'd been thinking about for the last two weeks. "Hey, that night was great. No apology needed. I understand family, I just got it all mixed up. That's so sweet, being so close to your little sister." She zipped up her lips, "You're a great brother, and don't worry, I'll keep your secret." He had mentioned that last time, with that same sad tone. Chicago really was home, it seemed. "Well, for what it's worth, Austin is not that bad. It grows on you for sure, but don't say goodbye to Chicago. You never know where life could take you." Laurel was giddy at the thought of him meeting Julia and Aaron. Julia will be thrilled, especially when she was already such a big fan. "Wait, that's great! I love it, I'll let them know meeting you has made it to the itinerary."

It hadn't occurred to her that her answers had a deeper meaning somewhere in there, but she had said she was an open book. "I'll hold you to that," she said with a smile, though it didn't quite reach her eyes. His question had thrown her off for a second. "Yeah. My mom, when she was still around. She was always going on and on about being a bit much, which is fine. It makes sense, I suppose. It helped me learned to tone it down." Though, she supposed toning it down was debatable. "Really? You'd learn with me. That would be so much fun, and we'd get a new skill out of it. Hopefully, some good food too." The thought was intriguing - her mind already trying to think of how could they make this work. Maybe borrowing her dad's kitchen, because the communal kitchen in the dorm buildings wouldn't cut it. "True, but it's all you at the end of the day. Pretty green eyes," and just like that - new nickname unlocked.

Laurel happily listened to him talk about his family. Usually, the family talk bummed her out, only reminding her of the odd mess she had. But, hearing him was a breath of fresh air. His family just sounded so sweet, full of love. Hearing that kind of love envelop him comforted her, especially when she thought back to the melancholy in his tone now. "Fooled me, or drew me in?" Wasn't it all about perspective? "Both of them like dancing, sounds like I need to thank them for their hard work teaching you. So, you're a snow over heat kind of guy?" Yet, he ended up here. How amusing. "That sounds so relaxing, cabin for holidays. You'll have to let me know how it goes. To Aspen? Unfortunately, no because you make it sound so fun. When we did vacations, my mom was always picking the places, and it was New York or Paris. I was also a kid, so it was a lot of following her around during shopping trips and then spending time with some random caretaker while they went out. Once it became my dad and I, then we tried visiting the Grand Canyon and sprained his ankle, so vacation cut short. But, his job keeps him busy too, so vacations are not too fun." He did try though, and that effort was everything to her. "Oh, true. Nerdy can be hot though, still doesn't matter if it's others' favorite hobby. Just yours. A self-help book, to teach others to flirt with you? No, thank you. I'll politely decline," she joked with a wink in his direction.

Something in common made her feel excited, eager to discover what else they could have in common. The possibilities seemed endless, which only made it better. "Random hobbies, huh? I mean, I'll try anything once really," that was said with a shrug. Her curiosity had a tendency to lead her to the most odd roads. "Are you trying to test my knowledge? Maybe so, or maybe I don't, but I could just throw random moves together and you wouldn't even know the difference. I'd have to dig the pom poms out of retirement," she laughed at the thought, though her attention was drawn back to his words. Laurel had never thought of silence that way, but there was no way to say that without it sounding pitiful. "The first one sounds familiar, but I guess I haven't had much of that second option. It could also be because I can never be quiet." Deflecting with jokes, a fine option. "You are just checking off all my boxes - cooking classes and stargazing, I am too lucky. I will be taking you up on that offer! I don't need the facts, just the company." His company, more specifically. "Yes, sounds like a plan. I still need to see these awesome blankets you hyped up earlier." They'd covered a decent amount of things already in the getting to know you trail, but she was quick to think of other things. "Okay, favorite color and what's one place, anywhere in the world, that you've always wanted to visit?"

#carmichael thorn |▪︎orphan au ▪︎|#believe me im on the floor rn #that song you sent earlier in the week helped with this reply just sayin #Laurel dont even know how true that is the cabin ✨✨✨✨#ITS TRUE NOT ALL SILENCE IS BAD THATS WHAT HE TEACHES HER #hes a cheer boy 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺#babygirl being mini menace makes me laugh #isa proud af there

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vodika-vibes · 2 days ago

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Hey, Vod'ika!! I saw you reblog memepocalypse's "gentle care" prompts and I saw you suggest requests for underrated clones so I'm here to deliver (numerous times) .

How about a Hound x reader fic where the reader sees him injured after an anti-clone dickhead jumps him with the prompt "I can't believe someone would do this to you"??

Love your work and hope you have a good day/night!!

You Deserve Better

Summary: Hound shows up on your doorstep bleeding, and you help him.

Pairing: ARF Trooper Hound x F!Reader

Word Count: 986

Warnings: Reader got pregnant at 17, and mentions of domestic abuse and child abuse.

A/N: So I'm not sure this is the greatest fic, I got really dizzy halfway through writing it, but I tried. I hope you like it.

Click HERE to be added to my taglist

“Are you okay?” You glance over your shoulder, from where you’re pulling your first aid kit out from under the sink, when you hear your son’s voice, tiny and afraid ask his question.

“I’m alright, verd’ika,” Hound sounds as jovial as ever, even though his face is covered in bruises. Even though he’s holding a cloth to his face to try and stop the bleeding, “Just a bad day.”

You watch your son watch Hound for a moment, his eyes old and tired in a way that looks out of place on a six-year-old. “Mama will patch you up,” He says, “She’s got a lot of practice.”

“Why don’t you take Grizzer and get ready for bed, Nel?” You ask as you walk over to Hound and set the massive first aid kit on the couch next to him.

Nel looks up at you, “What if the bad man comes here?”

“He won’t.” You smooth your hand over his head, “And if he does, we have Grizzer.” Your son stares at you for a moment longer, and then he nods. You wait until you hear his bedroom door click shut before you focus your attention on Hound.

You pop open the first aid kit and pull on some gloves before you carefully start to tend to his injury. Hound watches you, his gaze darting between your hands and the first aid kit.

“You know,” He offers, “I really only needed you to call my brother. This wasn’t me needing you to take care of me.”

“I don’t mind,” You reply, “Head injuries bleed a lot, so it looks worse than it is. I am a little worried about a concussion, though.” You pull away from him to grab something else out of the kit, “How did this happen? Your armor is supposed to protect you.”

“I was jumped by some anti-war protestor.”

You pause, your gaze snapping to his in disbelief, “What?”

“Yeah, apparently it’s my personal fault that we’re still at war.” Hound jokes with a wry smile.

“That’s…” You take a deep breath to smother your anger before it flares hot, “I can’t believe someone would do this to you.” You say instead.

“People are tired of the war,” Hound replies, “I’m just an easy target.”

You scowl at him, “It’s not right.”

“Of course not. But it is what it is.”

Your scowl deepens. This situation sucks. All of it. You wish you could just take Hound and run away somewhere. Hound and Grizzer.

But there’s nowhere in the galaxy where a clone would be safe.

“So,” Hound interrupts your thoughts, “Where’d you learn how to first aid like this? Nel seems a bit…steady…to need a first aid kit like this.” You’re able to translate his words easily. He means that Nel is too careful to get badly hurt.

And, well, he’s right.

You consider him for a moment, “My ex. Nel’s father. He liked to drink and he didn’t much like me. Or Nel.”

“You had a kid with someone who hates you?”

“Eh. I was 17, and my implant failed, and then I got guilted into keeping Nel. In truth, he’s the only good thing that came from that relationship. But I stayed with his father for far too long.”

“What happened—ow!” You roll your eyes when Hound jerks away from you when you start to clean his head wound.

“Well, he tried to kick Nel after he was done working out his anger on me,” You reply, “So I took Nel and went to my parents. I stayed with them while my dad and brothers got all of my, and Nel’s, stuff. And I never saw him again.”

“Never?”

“Well, he vanished.” You shrug, “I have a pretty good idea about what happened, but I don’t have any proof. And, really, we’re better off without him.”

“So, you know first aid because you were in an abusive relationship,” Hound says slowly.

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry. That should have never happened to you.”

“Yeah, well. People are people, and people suck sometimes.” You pull away from him, “Alright, all I need to do is put a bandage on this, and you’ll be all set.”

Hound catches your wrist when you go to put the bacta bandage on his forehead, “You know people are generally good, right cyare?”

“How can you, of all people, think that?” You shake off his hold and press the bandage to his forehead. “You’re a member of the guard, it’s no secret to me that you are all being mistreated by the people who work with you.”

“I mean, sure. People in positions of power suck, but the average person—”

“...you were, quite literally, just jumped by an average person, Hound.”

“...I’m sure he didn’t mean it.”

You sigh and tug your gloves off, before gently cupping his face in your hands, “What am I going to do with you?”

“Love me forever?”

“Silly man, of course I am.” You just wish you could keep him safe. But the only way to do that would be to leave Coruscant, and he’d never leave his brothers.

Hound stands, hand hands dropping to your waist. “I don’t deserve you.”

“You deserve better.” You correct him with a gentle smile, “Now, do you want to stay the night? Nel will be thrilled to see you in the morning.”

“Just Nel?”

“Mm, well. I wouldn’t kick you out of bed.”

Hound laughs and leans in so his nose is bumped against yours, “Let me call Fox and get his okay, and then I’d love to stay.”

“Good,”

He closes the tiny distance between your lips, and you sigh into the kiss. Maybe, if you find a ship big enough, you can steal all of the guards? You're sure your brothers and parents will help. But that’s a problem for later you.

Present you needs to make some food for him to eat.

@imabeautifulbutterfly

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@justiceandwar98

@mira-loves-star-wars

@tiredbi-peach

@dukeoftheblackstar

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@etod

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@continous-mistakes

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@rebell-ious

#star wars #tcw #arf trooper hound x reader #hound x reader #star wars fanfiction #x reader fanfiction #f!reader fic #answered asks #tw: abuse #tw: child abuse

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liquidorcard · 2 days ago

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HEY Y'ALL IT'S MIKAILER WITH AN "ER" WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO GRASP!?

---

Did I get your attention, Mikaila? I hope so, let's see.

Mikaila, I don't like you. You've done shit that's soured my opinion of you. I'm acknowledging that now to get that out of the way. I'm not here to be two-faced about this or blow smoke up your ass.

But as one idiot who stayed in a toxic relationship to another-- I'm not making fun of you because I think I'm better. I know. Being in a relationship like that brings out some ugly shit. You resent and fear people will never forgive you. You don't know if you will forgive yourself. I'm not making fun of you because I think I'm better than you.

And it feels kinda good, being treated badly? In a weird way? When you're used to it? When you feel you kind of deserve it? It did for me too. My abuser did some fucked up shit to me. I don't know how to describe to you the strange feelings I'm left with now. Sometimes I think I finally hate her, sometimes, as pathetic as it makes me feel, I still miss her. It's a rot in you that never really goes away, but you learn to live with it. I understand that agony. I understand that anger of how fucking unfair it is.

You know my opinion of Lily. You're not going to trust me that I'm not saying all this just to get you two to break up to hurt her. Fair. Very fair, not going to pretend like it's not. But if Lily loves you, nothing I'm about to say should be an issue. She should want what's best for you, right?

Here's the rub Mikaila, it's been a few years now. I know you want out of your situation at home, but it doesn't seem like Lily's going to be able to help you with that at this point. I'm sure Lily's given you plenty of reasons as to why, and it's time to listen to her.

If you're heart's set on coming to Canada, your best bet is getting a job here. Or even, going to school. Art degrees (Here in Canada) aren't as expensive, provided you go to the right school. Even taking out a student loan for just one year to figure your shit out. I know you're in quite a bit of debt right now and don't want to get into more, but. You gotta do what you gotta do.

Here's the college I went to. Yes, your work is sufficient to potentially get admitted. Believe it or not, art school's get that illustration is a learned skill. Artists start from all different levels:

Look through the admissions requirements to see if you have the academic records to be admitted. If not, you could also consider upgrading through online classes aswell.

Again though, your best bet is to try to find employment. The cost of living isn't great here right now, but it isn't great anywhere. I doubt you'll be able to find cheaper rent in America.

Once you're here or wherever you end up, away from the chaos of your home, you might find it a lot easier to get your head around, establishing some better independence and becoming a citizen by yourself. It's a shitty process, but not as bad as the one you guys have in the States. We stan an immigrant here.

You need to look out for you, Mikaila. It's not selfish. It's not a matter of whether you "really deserve it or not." Nobody's going to save you. You're emotionally spent because of your parents, You're emotionally spent because of Lily. And it feels kind of nice how much Lily needs you. But you can't help her until you help yourself - and again, if we're all wrong and Lily really loves you, she shouldn't have a problem with you finding your way.

My own mother once told me I was "born sad." I've never not hated myself. I ate up any little bit of love and validation no matter how many bitter, razor pills that came with it too. That's just how it is for some of us.

But you know what Mikaila? Fuck em. Fuck all of them. Fuck everything. Fuck me, Mikaila. You've got one life. One body. One you. Whatever you think of her, someone's gotta fight for that poor bitch. Why not you fight for you?

Everyone's a stinky meat bag stripped down, Mikaila. Everyone's made a fool in the wake of the shit people like you and I have been through. Not everyone's going to be able to forgive everything, but everyone's not wholly past forgiveness.

I'm no better than you Mikaila. Nobody is. Some of us just get to know the worst sides of ourselves better than others.

I don't like some of the things you've done, girl. But I see you. I get it. Tell us all to eat shit. Fix your life. Don't rely on Lily to make you feel whole or to save you. To make you feel worthy. No person can do that. She could be the reincarnation of Mary Mother of God herself, and you couldn't expect that from her. Be your own advocate. If your relationship isn't toxic, it can survive you becoming a more whole you.

This asshole is rooting for you. Give me an excuse to undoomer "Mikailer." My girl needs a win.

#lily orchard #lily orchard critical #anti lily orchard #lily peet #lily orchard stuff #lorch posting #youtube #liquid orcard #eldritch lily #mikaila orchard

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blackynsupremacy · 20 hours ago

Text

THERE’S SOMETHING

ABOUT YOU.

CHAPTER 4

pairing: smallville!clark kent x black!fem!oc

fandom: smallville (2001-2011)

guest starring: aaliyah haughton as lyric james

also starring:

michael rosenbaum as lex luthor

emmanuelle vaugier as dr. helen bryce

rick gonzales as omar reyes

bianca lawson as trina davis

summary: ever since lana lang has moved in with the sullivan’s, clark kent’s nightly telescopic views of the galaxy and daily glimpse of the sunrise tend to get lonelier. that is until a moving truck, a wandering amicable feline, and her frustrated owner, lyric james, makes her debut in his life as her family are the new owners of the old potter house next door. things between the new neighbors start to shift as clark is tasked as her personal tour guide at her new school. one little slip is all it takes for her to learn he’s more than meets the eye in this small town.

taglist: @sabrinasopposite @camiesully @zombigrlll @ellethespaceunicorn @rosiestalez @afrogirl3005 @afrowrites @elitesanjisimp @jkr820 @simply-the-best23 @gxuxhdjdu @tryingtograspctrl @xoxoglittergossip @hnch33rios @paisholotus

contains: lots of words, friends to neighbors, use of gifs for visuals, tooth rotting fluff, long flashback, really heavy angst, heartbreak, emotional cheating, mention of death, depression, anger, lyric and clark getting closer, mild swearing, cute moments, slow burn, main audience is black readers but everyone is welcome. lyric’s thoughts. clark’s thoughts. chloe’s thoughts.

PLEASE READ: CHAPTER 3

the golden afternoon sunlight shown down on lyric nd clark’s faces as they waited for chloe to arrive. they were outside of the barn and clark wanted to kill time by shooting some hoops while lyric sat on the side to observe. as she saw him jog and dribble the basketball to shoot it perfectly into the net, she realized that clark had a very athletic build. she could see it in his arms, legs, and best of all, his torso and chest. lyric broke her stare and chided herself for such thoughts, but one had to be a fool to not think clark as tall, dark, and handsome by any means. he also had the proficient athletic skills, and almost perfect academic standing, but he never mentioned anything about being on one of smallville high’s several athletic programs. no football, no basketball, not anything. it just seemed like a waste of talent when she saw the ball flawlessly glide through the net once again.

“you sure know how to hoop, clark!” lyric complimented with a slow nod of approval. even though clark was a little exasperated, his smile couldn’t resist the girl’s praises.

“gee, thanks, lyric! i can’t take all of the credit. i learned mostly from pete’s older brothers and they told me it’s all about technique.”

“you never fail to be modest. that’s got me thinkin’— do you play any sports at school? you never mentioned it, but it’s impossible because you got the skill, you got the grades, and you sure as hell have the looks for it!” she enthusiastically hyped, gesturing her hand towards his six foot frame. for some reason, clark’s face got heated. his cheeks flutter with a hue of red. he wasn’t so used to friends of the opposite sex speak so fondly of his appearance. calm down, dude, it’s just a compliment. take it with a grain of salt. he clears his throat and shyly wipes the sweat off his brow with his forearm.

“well, i do want to play football. i’ve tried it once earlier, but things didn’t quite work out with the coach. he had some—anger issues among other shady things that my parents weren’t exactly comfortable with. hopefully, i can give it another shot down the road while we’re still in high school. maybe if i’m good enough, i could make the quarterback spot.”

clark said as he bounced the ball and stepped towards where lyric was standing. he could remember it like it was yesterday. he joined the smallville high crows football team after so many attempts to convince his parents to at least let him try out. they only forbade it due to the risk of clark’s powers being exposed, but he’d figured he’d have a handle on them by now, and it was an activity that made him feel like a normal teen. it was all fun and games until the head coach was caught helping his players cheat on tests, so they could play. when the principal got word of it and set out the proper consequences for the coach, things got heated…literally. clark spared lyric the details because she was already so curious about the wall of weird and the last thing she needed was for her to feel like she wasn’t safe in this supposed quiet small town.

“oh. well, that’s too bad, but when you do, i’ll be rooting for you from the stands! you’d have a pretty good shot at it. i’m more of a basketball fan, but i guess i can make the exception.” they both fill the air with light laughter and their conversation comes to a halt at the sound of a tooting horn. a vibrant, red volkswagen beetle swiftly pulls up in front of the barn. the driver’s side window rolls down to reveal a smiling chloe behind the wheel and pete seated comfortably in the passenger.

“hey, you guys! are you geared up for the most exhilarating studying session of your entire lives?” chloe wittingly questions as pete chuckles and shakes his head before chiming in,

“you can always count on chloe to call a regular old studying session ‘exhilarating’. ”

“hey! in my defense, wherever there’s coffee, i might as well do what i do with caffeine in my veins.”

clark and lyric give each other a knowing glance, a glint of humor within their eyes before they make their way closer to the car. clark leans against the driver side with his arm propped up against the top. his piercing blue eyes meets chloe’s gaze with a charm that she knew too well and loved too much.

“exhilarating, huh? it sounds to me like you’re putting that vocabulary list from english to good use, chloe.” clark commented with a lopsided smirk.

“well, if i’m ever going to make it big at the daily planet as a journalist, i’d better possess some type of flawless vocabulary, clark.” the blonde retorts and leans her head over to the side to spot lyric and greet her.

“hey, lyric! you can hop in and sit in the front with me, so we can have some girl talk on the way to town.”

lyric received the offer with a grin, but shook her head to politely decline. she saw that pete was there first and didn’t want to be rude by putting him out of his seat.

“i appreciate it, chloe, but i don’t wanna take pete—“

“oh, nonsense. he’ll be fine! he can just sit in the back with clark. it’s my car after all.” chloe urges by cutting her green eyes to the boy beside her, signaling him to move to the back. pete doesn’t protest. he gathers his bag and meets with clark in the right backseat as lyric meets with chloe in the passenger seat. the teens all buckle up their seatbelts and chloe pulls off onto the dusty path out of the neighborhood to journey to downtown smallville. during the ride, chloe’s natural inquisitiveness takes over when asking general questions about the new girl next door in her passenger seat. the boys casually sit in the back quietly to observe the conversation.

“so, lyric, where you do hail from?”

“new york. brooklyn, to be exact.”

“ah, another fellow city girl. i’m from metropolis which isn’t too far from smallville, but new york to smallville is quite a stretch. is there a specific reason why?” lyric purses her lips at the question and swallows to easily get past without dwelling too much on the reason.

“my family just wanted a new scene. someplace…quiet and peaceful.” her soft voice drifts as she gazes at the lengthy path of cornfields at the side of the road.

“that’s valid. um, so what do you like to do?”

“nothing too extreme. i like to listen to vinyls, chill with my cat, and i take some pictures here and there.”

“aw, a cat! what’s their name? if my dad didn’t have such a fatal allergy, i’d love to have a furry friend.” chloe enthusiastically coos passing the sign that indicated that they were entering downtown smallville.

“her name is noir. she’s a black cat that looks like she could do no wrong, but it’s a whole ‘nother story. don’t get me wrong, i love her with all my heart, but she’s so damn sneaky sometimes that she’s almost sent me into a nervous breakdown. i’ll say if it weren’t for her, i wouldn’t have met clark though, so i guess there’s a light at the end of that tunnel.” chloe presses further to her details of the day.

pete tuned in as well to hear lyric recount that hectic morning. chloe picked up on lyric’s tone. chloe liked to her the girl beside her talk. her voice was smooth, soft, and gentle like rain to the ear. she can hear the frustration of when lyric discovered that noir was missing in a new area shift to that of ease and resolution when she discovered a well fed and content noir in the arms of the noble farm boy next door. pete turned from lyric’s direction to momentarily glance at clark as she spoke. he witnessed the sky blue pupils of his best friend attentively focus on lyric as if he were hearing this story for the first time. there was a certain positive emotion that rested on his face, he even chimed in his own perspective and a little inside joke causing the duo to dissolve into laughter. pete saw that was usually new. when clark talked to girls, he’d be a bit guarded, but friendly enough, but from what he saw between clark and lyric just now, clark looked to be so at ease, so at liberty.

once the volume of the chatter diminished to a peaceful silence, lyric’s deep, brunette pupils wandered at the sights of the many local owned establishments this quaint city had to offer. there was quite a few people out enjoying the serene, golden afternoon as they strolled with their pets and families on the sidewalk. clark, pete, and chloe were kind enough to point out some key areas that were worth exploring for when lyric was ready to take that new step. they passed an array of shops, boutiques, restaurants, and community centers, but lyric had one burning question.

“these all seem really cool, ya’ll, but does smallville have a music store? i got a whole collection to keep up with at home.” lyric inquires with expectant glance towards the trio. pete immediately knew the answer as he and his family had lived in smallville for ages.

“i know one that’s not too far from here. i think it’s called main street melody. i believe from the talon it’s just down two blocks and it’s a cool place. i’ve been there a couple times for some mixtapes. we should go check it out after we study if you’re up for it.” pete stated scooting his body forward from the backseat to the middle, positioning himself with his elbows on the console between the girls.

“yeah! i’d like to see what they got. i really appreciate that, pete. you’re a real one.” lyric’s eyes locked with his and she flashed a congenial dimpled smile of gratitude to which pete took it with a tingling sensation in his stomach and a bashful grin of his own, his chestnut toned face heated slightly.

“i-it’s, uh, it’s no problem, lyric. i’m glad to be of some help.” he lets out a stammering chuckle and scoots to the backseat. a dazed, delighted look was etched on his face. he didn’t even notice that clark examined him with an arched brow and tilted head. guess i’m not the only one. clark thought to himself. chloe was listening to the conversation unfold, she chuckled after witnessing pete’s reaction to lyric’s natural beauty and charm. for a city girl, she had that small town girl-next-door charisma down to a tee.

“ask her out, why don’t you!” chloe snickered and slowed the car down to precisely parallel park in front of a building. like smallville high, it possessed the color palette of red, gold, and black. it resembled one of those classic movie theaters from the seventies and there was a large, neon sign that displayed the word, TALON, vertically letter-by-letter in gold lettering. lyric found it to be aesthetically pleasing in an old-fashioned sort of way.

“chloe!” the guys whine in sync at chloe’s forwardness, not wanting to be put out there in front of lyric. clark knew that chloe was directly talking to pete, but he still felt like he was caught doing something he shouldn’t. lyric chortled, shaking her head and playfully rolling her eyes at chloe as the girls unbuckled their seatbelts.

“come on, chlo’, don’t bug him like that! it probably didn’t mean anything. leave them alone!” she joked and leaned down to grab her belongings and passed over chloe’s bag for her to receive.

chloe shrugged her shoulders, pursing her pink glossed lips.

“i admire your modesty, lyric, but i’ve been around them long enough to know when a guy is completely smitten. you should ask clark when it comes to lana lang.”

clark’s eyes cut to chloe in annoyance with a deadpanned expression. despite chloe trying to humor lyric, there was a hint of envy underneath her lighthearted tone.

“girl, i already know! i mean, lana seems nice and she’s gorgeous, but you are too! who wouldn’t want to be looked at like that? it’s an exciting feeling—it’s an experience to appreciate while you still got it…don’t trip on pete and clark so much. they’re good guys.” she compliments with a glance towards the backseat and proceeds to gather her belongings, exit the car, and wait for the others to follow suit. clark walked passed lyric, chloe, and pete to hold the door open for all of them to enter to the crowded hangout. once she stepped in, lyric was amazed with the turnout of this place. she noticed that the main population were teens and young adults, but there were good bit of older patrons as well. the interior was setup like any lounge of a modern coffee shop with individual tables that were scattered throughout the room. the decor was set to look like the royal palaces and chambers of ancient egypt, the walls and pillars were engraved with hieroglyphics. there were lights that were strung along giving the room such a faint ambient glow. the warmness of the luxurious golds and yellows mingled with the cool, sophisticated regalia of the blues and violets. the talon was so immense that it had a stairway and so much more that lyric wanted to gawk at before chloe grabbed her wrist to leave the boys behind to grab a table and lead her to the counter. it was there where she saw lana lang preparing a drink order by maneuvering the large, chrome coffee machine. when the girls made it to the counter, chloe’s bubbly voice caused lana to stop what she’s doing and welcome them with an award winning smile.

“hey, you guys! lyric, i’m so glad you’ve came. welcome to the talon. so, what do you think of the place so far?” lana questioned with her hands to gesture at the lounge.

“thank you, lana! i love the setup, the theme, and it’s huge! no wonder why it’s so jumpin’ here. it looks like one of those old movie theaters from the outside.” lyric compliments which lana graciously accepted before she gives lyric the run down on how the talon was in fact a movie theater where her late parents met. she’d quit cheerleading causing her to fight tooth and nail against her aunt’s expectations of her high school career and to keep the place open by converting it to a coffee shop and movie theater after partnering with lex luthor. ever since then, the talon has been thriving more than ever.

“if it weren’t for lex, this place would’ve been a distant memory.” chloe stated, her eyes perusing the scene laid out in front of them. lana solemnly nodded in agreement.

lex luthor. where did lyric hear that name before? right, at dinner with the kents. it was the rich guy that clark saved and they’ve good been friends since then. i don’t remember much about what he’d look like, but he’ll most likely stand out from the rest of the citizens of smallville for sure. lyric sympathetically nods, lending lana her congratulations and condolences while still feeling curious.

“i’m so sorry for your loss, lana. they would be so happy that you did this to keep their memory alive. i respect you for that!”

“thank you, lyric, would i be more worthy of your respect when you get your first free coffee?”

the girls briefly giggle and lyric decided to play it safe by requesting a regular cappuccino. chloe ordered the usual for her and the guys before they both walk to find clark and pete at a corner table, with their books and papers all set out for the academic cramming to begin. one empty seat was to clark’s left and the other, to pete’s right. as the girls approached them, lyric lightened the mood at the sight of the boys’ serious, focused attention on the assignments.

“did we keep ya’ll waiting that long that you’ve already started the assignment that’s due next week?” lyric joked, sharing a chuckle with chloe when clark and pete’s head’s simultaneously peer up at the sound of her voice. chloe gestured to the empty seats,

“we’ve already ordered the study fuel, by the way. mind if we sit?”

“no, not at all. here, lyric. you can take this one.” clark offers after putting his book down on the table. he stands up to pull out the empty chair next to him for her to sit. lyric felt that familiar fluttering within her stomach as she came closer to the table to sit down next to clark. girl, calm down. he’s just being a gentleman, it’s not like he’s pulled a chair out for you before. once she was scooted in and comfortable, she thank him with a smile of gratitude and rummaged through her backpack to find the unfinished assignments she had to complete. chloe took the seat next to pete and she couldn’t help, but feel a bit—slighted. don’t get her wrong, as much as she loved clark (more than) platonically, she was unfortunately living with the reality that he would never reciprocate those feelings for the sake of their friendship and his own feelings for lana. although, she’d never seen him move so quick to have a girl next to him besides…lana. especially not a girl he’d just met a couple days ago. chloe pondered if it was just the effect of that house. god, what’s in the water there? clark nip? her train of thought halted at the sound of an annoyed ground.

“mmcht! don’t tell me that i— ugh, where’s it at!” lyric hissed as she frantically searched through her bag with a confused, yet frustrated expression.

“what’s the matter, lyric?” clark asked with inquiring, blue eyes.

“i think i left the monte cristo book at home. it’s only my first assignment and the last i need is to be behind even more. ugh!” she huffs and assertively zips the bag closed after gathering everything else.

“here, we can use mine. i haven’t quite finished reading yet, so we’re gonna have to split it.”

“that’s really cool of you, clark, but are you sure—“

“lyric, i insist. that’s what good neighbors neighbors are for, right?” he questioned with his amicable gaze locked with hers, flashing that cheeky, pearly white smile that she knew so well, but for so little. her face heated with a nervous grin and chuckle. to keep herself composed and promptly get the assignment done, she didn’t choose to argue.

“if you’re gonna put it that way, clark, i might as well. hell, it’s not like i got a choice. thank you—again.” she concedes and opens her notebook before scooting a little closer to clark to steal a decent glance of the text.

“it’s always my pleasure, lyric.” he softly responds with a lingering grin before filling her in on the chapter they’re supposed to report on.

as they silently read and briefly gave each other’s analysis of a phrase, clark’s attentive gaze focused on her as she spoke, but his nostrils naturally inhaled the scent of the sweet fresh, natural scent of cocoa butter mixed with hints of vanilla and coconut. it was such a pleasant aroma that complimented the smell of brewing coffee. clark was so caught up, that he didn’t even notice lex luthor waltz in the door with his fiancée, dr. helen bryce, traveling closely by his side with their fingers intertwined. the luthor’s eyes darted from table to table to find his good friend with his usual circle. to his avail, he found them at their table in the corner. there was also another person he hadn’t seen before and she was sitting awfully close to clark while chatting and taking notes. lex found it odd to see clark in such a position with a girl besides lana. with burning curiosity, he lets helen know that he’s going to speak to clark momentarily while she can use his card to get them some coffee and pastries. helen agreed, as she wanted to minimize any interaction with the farm boy knowing what she knows, but she’ll civilly swing by after she handles business at the counter, so they go their separate ways.

“long time, no see, clark.” lex says as he strides to the table of the four preoccupied teens that shift their attention to him. clark receives lex with an amicable smile and immediately greets him back,

“hey, lex! it’s good to see you out of the shadows of the mansion. how’re things going with you and dr. bryce?”

lex casually grins while stuffing his hands in the pockets of his tailored pants.

“not too bad. we both had a bit of a catastrophe of a work day, so we decided to unwind with some coffee and sweets. i hope i’m not interrupting important, you seem to be preoccupied—with your studies.”

“oh, no, not at all. let me guess, you and mr. luthor had another falling out?”

lex confirms with a silent, tight lipped nod. his inquisitive eyes shift to lyric who returned her own curious stare.

“i guess i left my manners with my father back at the mansion. it’s nice to meet you, my name is lex luthor, ceo of luthorcorp , and you must be…?” he pauses, leading her to answer,

“i’m not trippin’ over it. i’m lyric. lyric james. my family and i just moved here from new york on saturday. i’m also clark’s new next-door neighbor and i’ve heard so much about you, mr. luthor.” she cordially regards, knowing this man was definitely not in high school. he holds his hand out for her to grasp and shake briefly before pulling their hands away.

“all bad, i suppose and please, call me lex. my father, lionel, should be referred as such.”

“no, sir, mr—lex. not from the way clark talks a good deal about you. i won’t front, i’ve heard some bad, but i can’t be the one to judge too quick because i don’t know you like you don’t know me. you must be lucky to have a friend like clark to save your life.”

“when you say it out, lyric, i couldn’t agree more with you. i’m always grateful for him and the kent’s. perhaps one day, you’ll see what i mean.”

lex received her statement with a warm smile upon his face. whoever this james girl was in clark’s circle, didn’t know him from a can of paint and still gave him a fighting chance without the use of a bribe, blackmail, nor smalltown gossip. he could see why the farm boy had a bit of a entranced look on his face towards her when he walked in. there was definitely something about her that was more than more than outer beauty. lex all of people would know.

as lyric and lex finished their conversation, she didn’t notice a blushing clark that hastily averted his gaze from her to his book, but she did see a beautiful young woman saunter from across the room and stop to stand closely beside lex. she possessed long brown hair, round brown eyes with long lashes, and full pink lips. by the way she stood so close to lex, lyric could obviously tell they were romantically involved.

“lex, they didn’t have the maple scones today, so i just got us some danishes and our usual drink order.” the woman said, handing him the pastry and a cup of coffee which he gratefully received by kissing her on the cheek. she pulls her blushing face from his lips and amicably greets the group before her,

“hello! i hope you all are doing well. chloe, pete—clark, and i’m sorry, i don’t believe i’ve seen you before. my name is dr. helen bryce i work at the local hospital here in smallville. who might you be?” she inquired with her amber gaze pointed to lyric. lex helped to save the girl’s breath by giving helen the introduction.

“thank you, helen. this is lyric james, she’s the kent’s new next door neighbor. her family had just moved to smallville from new york a few days ago.”

helen squinted and registered the familiar surname before the lightbulb of realization came on,

“ah, right! when i heard “james”, i had a hunch it was you. i know your mother, crystal, she’s one of the newest nurses on my team. even though she just started, i can tell she’s a very dedicated woman to the profession. she’s mentioned that she had a daughter attend smallville high and here she is. it’s so nice to finally meet you, lyric.”

“likewise! thank you, dr. bryce for the kind words about my mom. it was great to meet you both!”

lex and helen bid the group a farewell and took their exit of the establishment. lyric beamed at the praise about her mother. it made her feel a twinge of guilt when she felt an ounce of resentment towards her parents for working so many hours of their demanding careers, but it warmed her heart at the knowledge that they made a difference, no matter where they went. hopefully, she’ll be able to live up to that expectation. two hours of studying pass by and the sun was beginning to set. chloe, clark, pete, and lyric are ready to throw in the towel and start packing up to go home. lyric wanted to check out the main street melody store, but one, she was already exhausted and two, she had a ride that she wouldn’t dare to keep waiting. she’d see it again another day.

one by one, chloe drops off her friends and wishes them a goodnight. once they made their stop in front of kent farm, chloe doesn’t leave without lyric spotting her a ten for gas. clark spectated as the girls playfully argue for two minutes because chloe kept refusing and lyric kept insisting. given her order was free, she didn’t have to spend anything and she wanted to return the favor. chloe finally conceded, took the money with gratitude, and pulled off, leaving lyric and clark alone again in front of his house. the quiet silence was filled with the sound of chirping crickets and the steady footsteps of lyric and clark as he walked her home. as they approached the james house, the driveway was bare and most of the lights were off. it appeared that her parents were still at work. clark didn’t feel right with her staying all alone in the house. outside of the light snack and coffee, he wasn’t certain if she had dinner. not to mention, the welfare of her black cat that he’s grown attached to. they stood on the large, round porch at the front door. lyric searched her bag to retrieve the entrusted house key. when she reached to turn the lock, the touch of a hand on her shoulder caused her to stop and turn around.

“what’s up, clark?”

“lyric, i think it would be safer for you and noir if you guys stayed at my house until your folks get home. at the end of the day, it’s your decision, but if you come over, you can try to call your parents and let them know. if not, just reach out if you need anything.”

lyric pondered on the farm boy’s offer with pursed lips. she was so used to this back home and it was quiet around here, so what could possibly go wrong? or so she thought, what if one those people infected by meteor rocks happened to stumble on what seemed to be an empty house with an unsuspecting teenager and her vulnerable feline sleeping peacefully? with a careful review of clark’s perspective and a deep sigh, her mind was made up.

“if it’s cool with mr. and mrs. kent, i’ll leave my parents a message, scoop noir, and we’ll be there. i didn’t want to intrude because i’ve done this before. i—“ she was cut off when a rumbling sound erupted from her abdomen. the two were dead silent for two seconds before clark broke it,

“i guess you wouldn’t mind intruding for dinner and you do know that you’re always welcome, right? judging by the sound of your stomach, it looks like you wanted to come over anyway.” he teased with a lopsided smirk.

“not too much on me, clark.” she playfully chided with her finger pointed in his direction. their laughter fills the air as she unlocks the door and she invites him to follow her inside. it didn’t take long to hear that familiar mewling sound and the soft jingling of a collar. noir cuddled herself against her owner’s ankle to receive loving pets upon her furry head, chin, and spine. when the cat spotted clark, she stood on her hind legs, tiny paws pressing against his jeans. clark took his cue to scoop her in his arms and gently hold her while lyric stood and watched in awe. she won’t lie, she loved how trusting noir was with clark. it made the butterflies in her arise when he saw this gentle giant of a farm boy cradle noir like that was his child. to keep herself down from cloud nine, she had another idea.

“hey, you want to listen to some records after dinner? that’s only if you want, we can just come back here and chill. it’s no pressure, if you’re tired i’d un—“

“lyric.”

“yeah, clark?”

“were you ever going to give me the chance to say ‘yes’?”

he grins, softly bouncing noir in his arms. she releases a faux gasp and playfully whacks him in the forearm, causing him to dissolve in laughter.

“i—clark kent! don’t mess with me right now, i know i talk a lot, but it’s been a long day. there’s nothing wrong with valuing other people’s time.” his gaze softened as he watched her take a piece of hair from that fell in her face to behind her ear.

“okay, okay. i’m sorry for teasing and thank you, i respect you for that. i’d love to come over to hear some records. it’s about time i’d expand my musical horizons. just like how you explored a literal horizon with your camera.”

“you’ve got a way with words, clark. now i can definitely see you being a journalist now. it’s a deal. you give me early morning sunrises and i’ll give you late night jam sessions, ya dig?”

he gives a nod of approval and lends lyric the chance to use her landline to call both her parent’s work extensions. crystal didn’t pick up, so she left a message. fortunately, joseph answered and gave his approval, but sternly teased lyric for her and clark to listen to records with her door open, whether he or crystal were home or not. the james girl concludes the conversation before her and clark proceed to take the familiar path to kent farm where she and noir were warmly received by jonathan and martha. they spent the next hour and a half indulging in the hot meal that was meticulously prepared and they were going around the table to share how their days went. even noir was content in the tuna and milk that was prepared for her by martha. when all were fed and the kitchen was tidy, the teens return back to the james house where lyric leads clark upstairs to her bedroom.

“welcome to my crib!” she exaggerates with wide arms as they enter and he chuckles at her quip. even with the new posters, furniture, and arrangements, clark knew that this was lana’s old room. he’d only really caught a glimpse of it through his telescope or within his odd dreams concerning his powers, but actually stepping foot inside felt so surreal. his blue eyes peruse to various spaces like to her bed, vanity, closet, and the overall setting that made the room reflect lyric of who she was. this was now her home, her room, and her space, so clark had to make peace with the fact that the past was in the past. it’s time to live in the now.

she led him to take a seat on her plush, lavender rug. while playing with noir in his lap, she walks a few feet away and squats to the record player to routinely adjust it to the proper settings. they endure a comfortable silence as lyric places the vinyl from stevie wonder’s 1971 album “where i’m coming from” on the turntable after scavenging through her growing collection.

her fingers gingerly lift the head-shell to delicately place the needle on the vinyl. as it starts to spin, the soft, soulful notes of “never dream you’d leave in summer” began to fill the room, lyric found herself lost in the music, her ebony gaze shifted to the window where the sky had transformed from a warm gold to the deep, dark shade of her cat’s coat. the melancholy melody solemnly filled her senses as the memories of him start to flood back like restless waves in the ocean. the song crooned, and lyric felt that painful lump form in her throat and the heaviness weigh in her chest. the memories all flash back within her brain —images of laughter, love, warmth, and the sharp sting of loss and betrayal that she thought was left in brooklyn still seemed to follow her no matter what she did , where she went, or who she talked to, lyric can’t forget about him. she glanced at clark who immediately met her gaze. his defined features softened by the dim amber light of her lamp. as his eyes were starting to paint the image of concern, she pondered on how long she could keep her inner turmoil a secret any longer. besides her parents, he was the only one who picked up on her sadness during the sunrise.

she realized that as the music played on, it was like a bittersweet reminder of everything she had faced back in her hometown. her bedroom suddenly felt charged with an energy that gave her the courage to speak, to finally share the real reason that why the james family would move all the way to smallville, kansas. after taking a drawn out breath, she turned her whole body to him, her lips slightly agape before she breaks the silence,

“clark, do you remember this morning when i was acting a little funny when it came to taking those pictures?— i tried so hard to play it off like it didn’t bother me of why i stopped, but if i’m going to live in the present, i need to let the past of my chest. if we’re going to be friends, the least we can do is be honest with each other, right?”

clark slowly nods and he could hear her heart racing. he sensed there was an urgency, she was scared, but of what? of who? he had hoped to the stars that it wasn’t of him. did he slip up and then perhaps she saw him use one of his powers? neither the matter, his concern was growing and he placed his hands on top of hers.

“lyric, you can tell me anything. i’m so glad that you could trust me enough to do that. just know that i’m here for you. i’m listening.” with a nod of his head, the look in his encourages her to take the time she needed.

she took one last deep, deep breath. she closed eyes her briefly to gather the millions of thoughts she had into one story.

“back in new york…i had a best friend. he became my first love then he became my worst enemy, and he’s long gone, but clark, i can’t let him go… his name was omar.”

BROOKLYN, NY 2000-2001

omar reyes was lyric james’ childhood best friend back in new york and her first love. he was a sweet boy that lived a decent childhood until his parents divorced and his dad had full custody of him after his mother moved away. to keep himself busy, omar decided to play basketball all throughout elementary and middle school. he’d study more often to make his parents proud and boy, were his grades were top tier. in the midst of that studying, he grew fond of science and anatomy, but his mind was already made up that he wanted to be a professional NBA player or a coach like his father after college. lyric could remember when he was just practicing shooting hoops on the street after the older kids excluded him for being too short to play and even though she didn’t have a deep knowledge of the sport, she learned to love it as she supported him. lyric pushed omar to show those bullies he that was capable of exceeding anyone’s expectations. the bond between him and lyric was unbreakable. omar was the one that gifted lyric with the hoops that she oddly still adorns to this day, they had their first kiss on her thirteenth h birthday, and when they turned fourteen, omar confessed his feelings and officially asked lyric to be his girlfriend to which she immediately accepted and the bliss of young love took its course in their lives.

he was a great first boyfriend for lyric. loyal, kind, affectionate, attentive, and humorous. her parents enjoyed his company, but things took a turn when they entered high school and not for the better.

omar seemed kind of…off.

he seemed to appear to be thinner and more fatigued than usual, but he just dismissed it as stress from school, sports, and life in general. while practicing in the gym, he had a hard fall that resulted in so many bruises on his body that he had to quit basketball indefinitely, so the school wouldn’t be held liable. it all came to a head at the beginning of freshman year when he was tutoring lyric at her place while crystal happened to be home preparing dinner. everything was fine until omar stood up to go to use the restroom and then he harshly collapsed to the floor after taking one step, rendering him unconscious. crystal urgently called the paramedics and his father to get him to the er. after the doctor ran some tests, omar was diagnosed with stage two leukemia and had to start treatment right away. lyric didn’t hesitate to stay by his side and visit the hospital as much as she could for the strength her boyfriend, herself, and their relationship. lyric hoped and believed that the treatment he was receiving would be the light at the end of the tunnel and everything would return to normal, right? wrong.

it all changed so drastically as the condition worsened from stage two to stage four. omar had to be sent to duke hospital for treatment. duke hospital was in durham, north carolina—which was almost five-hundred miles away. omar and lyric decided to make a long distance relationship work by writing letters and talking on the phone when they were both available. lyric and omar consistently corresponded with each other those first few weeks. well—mostly lyric, but she understood because he needed to focus on getting well and the best she could do was stick by him like a loyal girlfriend, right? she added in something special to each letter, a developed photo that she snapped with her camera. each photo possessed the inspiration that captured the essence of their home and memories.

days turn to weeks, and weeks into months with no update from neither omar nor his parents. lyric grew weary, a bitter vile feeling within the pit of her stomach. something wasn’t right. one day, she came home after school and she was baffled to see both of her parents were home, sitting in the living room. they tell her to sit down in order to relay the message from the reyes family: omar lost his battle and he was gone. lyric was so in shock that her parents voices faded out, so she couldn’t even register the details of a funeral, a wake, or a cremation. seven days of mourning passed and the event of the funeral arrived. clad in all black with dark loc shades, lyric was cold and numb, but at the urging of omar’s family, she was permitted to say heartfelt remarks about the deceased. how could she explain a lifelong bond within two to three minutes? she looked at some familiar and unfamiliar faces in the crowd as she recounted her times with boyfriend—well, ex-boyfriend. by the time she was done, the tears silently rolled down her cheeks and her mother consoled her through the entirety of the service. everyone in attendance came back to reyes’ home to eat, give their condolences, and chat about the mundane. lyric was seated on the sofa and just stared at the minimal portion of food on her plate. she’d rarely had an appetite during the time of her bereavement. her state of disassociation was paused when an unfamiliar, high pitched female voice breaks her out from her solitude.

“so i guess you must be lyric, huh?” the james girl gazed at the other teenaged girl in front of her. she was a few inches shorter. although heartache painted her face, she had striking features that consisted of tawny brown skin, deep almond shaped eyes, high cheek bones, and full lips.

“is this seat taken?” the girl asked to which lyric shook her head side to side, giving her the cue to sit. the girls sit in an awkward silence for about two minutes and the latter began to speak,

“i already know your name, so it’s only fair that you know mine— i’m trina davis. um, my mom and i came up from north carolina to say our final goodbyes. she was actually the lead nurse that helped with omar’s cancer treatment at duke.”

“it’s nice to meet you, trina. how long are you in town for?” lyric inquired.

“likewise! we’ll be flying back the day after tomorrow—lyric, may i ask you a question?”

lyric deliberately nods and placed the untouched plate from her lap onto the coffee table. she turned her body to trina, awaiting the question.

“i don’t want to pry, but i’m gonna try to make this make sense as much as possible. so—i’ve heard in your speech that you were omar’s girlfriend, how long have you guys been together?”

“well we made it official this past july. he got diagnosed in september, went to duke in october, and now it’s february, so a good six months, if my math is on point.” she dryly chuckled.

“why?” lyric quizzed and her eyes caught onto trina’s dumbfounded expression. lyric noticed the gulp that ran down the girl’s neck as her jaw clenched.

“you know how i said that my mom was the lead nurse for him, right?”

lyric nodded again to lend the girl a listening ear. trina began to explain how her mother had inspired her to work in the field of caring for cancer patients, so she decided to do volunteer work by reading to the patients and keeping them company, you know to get that experience. that was when she met omar in mid october. she would read titles such as to kill a mockingbird or the count of monte cristo. omar expressed that he was looking forward to reading those books in his honors english class, but life happened. with her mother’s permission, the teens would sit in the hospital garden and chat beyond the analysis of the characters in the texts they’ve read. on a weekly basis, they’d converse about their pet peeves, hobbies, interests, music tastes, favorite movies, and anything under the sun really.

at the start of november, trina sat at omar’s bedside and he was dozing off. that was her cue to leave silently and she ran into a nurse who had an envelope with omar’s name on it in his hand. trina told the nurse that omar was sleeping and that she will place it on his bedside. the nurse gives the envelope to trina and took his leave as she examined the enclosed message. her natural nosiness wanted to know of the hand that inked her new friend’s name in blue with such skilled calligraphy. trina stopped herself from her the temptation to open it and sat it down beside him. the next week in the garden, she questioned omar about the letter. he then dismissed the value of the letter and that it was his from his “home girl lyric” from his hometown. to ease trina’s worries, he reassured her that would read it later that day.

omar received lyric’s letters frequently, but with the sickness that took toll on his body had hindered his correspondence. it wasn’t like omar didn’t cherish her letters and photographs that he received at first, but with each passing day his heart for their relationship grew more distant as he started to grow more tired of his condition and tired of his life. omar couldn’t sit in denial that he fought the good fight for long enough. at that point, he was ready to raise and wave the white flag in surrender, but he didn’t want to tell lyric anything. he didn’t want to cause her anymore heartbreak than he already had, so he just stopped responding all together. he had hoped that one day lyric would find it in her heart forgive him, whether he lived or not. trina unknowingly accepted the answer and reassures him that his friend would understand. she joked that if she was his girlfriend then there would be some suspicions, but if they’d agreed to make that work, then lyric would be a saint.

by thanksgiving, trina and omar grew closer in their emotional connection. even though trina enjoyed the day with her own family, she found it in her heart to urge her mother to drop by duke to at least deliver omar a light plate of her grandmother’s home style cooking, with his appetite willing. jovial at her mother’s approval, she was already up the elevator and knocked softly on omar’s door before she sauntered her way in with her offering. the teens faces beamed as they saw each other after a short time apart. trina placed the aluminum foil covered plate to reveal the basics such as turkey, dressing, mac n’ cheese, and potato salad. omar looked at it like it was first —or last meal. he told her he’d eat it tomorrow when his appetite allowed him and she put it to the side. the two made small talk before she attempted to leave the room only to feel a hand meekly grab onto hers.

“omar is everything ok—“ her sentence was cut short as her face collided with his chest and both of his arms encircled around her. trina was stunned at this.

“just stay with me…. i’m scared.”

he pleads for her presence and her heart grew heavy in sorrow as omar’s tears rain on her scalp, so stayed for a little bit longer. omar knew that he wouldn’t have much time left and he needed her to be by his side until then, so it didn’t take long for them to get emotionally involved through the holiday seasons until his untimely demise.

lyric sat there as her emotions internally wreaked havoc in her mind. she swallowed before she stuttered her words out.

“y-you’re telling me t-that you and omar were—

“yes.” trina somberly interrupted. “we were together until he died. he only called you his good friend, so i thought it was okay. i’m so sorry, lyric. i swear i didn’t know because he’d rarely talk about you after that.” trina’s voice started to crack and got higher in pitch as the tears rapidly streamed down her cheeks. she gazed down at the ground with such guilt and disappointment.

“god, i wish that my nosiness made me see the truth in that letter, but i respected him that much, so i didn’t. lyric, i’m—“

“it’s fine.” lyric cut her off.

“no—no, lyric, it’s not fine. we knew of his condition and he knew it was getting worse, but it doesn’t give him the right to fool us like that. especially not to you, i only knew him in his last moments and you, his whole life! if i were you i’d be—

“don’t tell me how i should feel, trina. i said it’s fine.” lyric sternly affirmed, her face stoic as her finger brushed a piece of hair from falling in front of her eye. she deeply sighed as her eyes looked up at the white ceiling, sliding her tongue across the front of her top teeth before resuming,

“you didn’t know, so i’m not mad at you, trina. i just wish i knew why he would do that and i know that i will never get my answer. not from you and definitely not from omar, so in that case, it’s fine.” lyric wraps her arm around trina’s shoulder to wish her the best when she travels back to north carolina and departed from her seat on the couch before fishing her parents out of the sea of visitors and informing them that she was ready to leave due to nausea. not exactly a lie, but a good excuse for the james family to leave quickly to their home.

to say that lyric was an emotional wreck was an understatement. for those next few weeks, her tears poured out until they ran dry and irritated her skin. she secluded herself within the four walls of her room, all day and all night unless she had to relieve herself. she didn’t care anymore. reassuring words didn’t fix this. sleeping for several hours didn’t fix this. toni braxton’s “unbreak my heart” on repeat certainly didn’t fix it. she closed herself off at school and floated by to at least pass the ninth grade, she didn’t want to celebrate her fifteenth birthday back in april, and the only ones she invited into her life were noir and the tunes on her record player. her parents were worried that it was just more than omar’s death that caused their daughter to spiral into such a state and they made that decision to get her counseling when summer break began. in the first and second sessions, the therapist wanted to get to know lyric personally on her own with her parents waiting outside the door. by the third session, joseph and crystal were present in the room. lyric didn’t want to speak nor cooperate. she was surprised that she got out of the sanctuary of her bed and went in the car without putting up a fight. no matter how many questions they’ve asked or exercises they were trying to perform, she’d stay frozen like a guarded statue until she reached her boiling point when asked,

“tell me this, lyric—if omar were sitting in this room what would you say to him now?”

her brows furrowed and a scowl was painted on her face. every muscle tensed as the word vomit was about to explode all over the office.

“everything around here reminds me of you. i want to let you go because you hurt me. you hurt me and i don’t want to think about you, but i need answers! how the hell could you break my heart without me noticing until you were gone?!”

lyric rose to her feet and began to pace around, her dark eyes shifted to a corner where she could see a vision of him so vunerable as he laid in the hospital bed, with trina at his side. “i swear, omar, if you weren’t dead already, i’d kill your ass—why the hell would you agree to a long distance relationship when you knew it wouldn’t work? if it wasn’t gonna work, why didn’t you hit me up or write me back? all i did was send you letters to tell you how much i loved and missed you, omar, but you just gave up—and you didn’t want to tell me, but you had the strength for somebody else. a girl you knew for a couple of months! wow. why? why, huh? WHY!?”

lyric confessed her plight to the therapist and her chest heaved as she collapsed with her head buried in her hands. her body was quivering as the hot tears flooded like water down her face. joseph and crystal quickly come to her aid. they had never seen their daughter be so enraged and emotionally inflicted. later that night, crystal and joseph had a private conversation, made some phone calls, and decided it was best to get lyric away from new york indefinitely.

SMALLVILLE, KANSAS 2002

“so, that’s why we really moved here. that’s how they ended up here in kansas. we had to get away and find a new scene, so that i couldn’t appear the girl that went mad with grief, but clark i still have those moments where i feel so empty. i felt like i was left to hang alone.”

by the time she concluded her story, the intensity of stevie’s voice increases, lyric tears up a bit and her lips start to quiver. she takes a deep breath and averts her gaze up to the cieling to bottle up what she couldn’t contain any longer. before she knew it, a pool of tears started to flow down the smooth, brown skin of her solemn face. clark clutched onto her hand to lightly squeeze it of reassurance.

“you’re not alone, lyric. i know what it’s like to lose someone and they’re the only ones who have the answers that you need. you feel that you miss them because…they’re the key to the truth and there’s nothing wrong about wanting to know the truth, no matter how life altering it could be. we just have to—oh!”

clark is interrupted when her arms are clutching to his torso and her face buried was near his middle.

“thank you—so much. all you’ve done has helped me since i came here. i can’t be grateful enough for you, clark.” her muffled, soft voice vibrated against his skin.

clark responded with one action that night: being there for her. he immediately wrapped his arms around her and let her sob her sorrows out until she dozed off to sleep with her head in his lap. noir sat by their side and observed the two as her tail softly swished across the floor. thankfully, lyric was a heavy sleeper. clark gingerly adjusted his body off the floor, so that he could carry her bridal style to gently lay her on the bed. he managed to tuck her in within the lavender duvet as he heard a car pull into the driveway and the sound of her parents call out to her. clark jogs downstairs to formally greet mr. and mrs. james. clark explains what went on that evening and that lyric was safely tucked in and asleep. at first her parents were so worried that lyric would endure another breakdown when omar situation was brought up, but they felt relief wash over them as they knew that clark was there every step of the way and that she was safe. they appraised him with their gratitude and offer for him to visit often. his family had made their family welcome and it was in due time to return the favor, especially for all of what the young kent has done for their daughter. clark bid the james family a goodnight and walked off of the porch before giving a final glance to lyric’s bedroom window. it was completely dark and his eyes of blue met with the yellow-green of noir’s. the feline was perched on the window sill.

“take good care of her for me, girl.” he said to the distant cat in a hushed tone before utilizing his super speed to get him home in a timely manner.

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