#I know a lot of people say it’s more about personality but lately I feel as though I just don’t have one
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@zepskies
Okay I'm here and I am ready for the finale of this wonderful series!
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“Was worried about you,” you whisper a confession against his lips. Dean briefly pauses, meeting your eyes. “Thanks for waiting up,” he says, with a hint of a smile.
I like this line, because it's what made Dean stop. In my head I feel like this version of Dean has pushed away so many people and the reader is the first person in a long time to genuinely say that she was "worried" about him, and it strikes something in his chest because he couldn't remember the last time it happened. That's the headcanon in my head anyway lol.
Also the spice was.... 😱🌶️🔥. I literally cannot write smut to save my life, but you always write it so well! I also liked that you didn't do it as intense as omegaverse usually is, because we both know how it can be 👀
“It’s too damn late,” he says, breaking the silence. “You realize that right?” You shoot him a frown. “Too late for what?” “For me to let you go,” he says. 
OH MY WORD DEAN SHUT UP! I promise it's okay! She loves you and she can see that you're not a bad person because you literally have been nursing her back to health with her broken ankle 😭 Not to mention you guys are fated! She's not going to let you go no matter what you do.
But again... on brand for Dean to hate himself and to think he's not good enough -sigh- just means that you get to spend more time wrapped up with him trying to convince him 😊😉. I also believe that Dean loves intimac, that he does crave that connection with someone, not to mention I still love what you do in your Midnight Espresso series with Dean being a little touch starved for non-sexual touch. I feel like you've also implied this here and it is marvelous!
His brotherly pride and his humor are tinged with something else though. You think you begin to understand. His losses have weighed him down, leaving him aimless and living in that in between, not unlike the ghosts he used to hunt. You know the feeling.  You thread your fingers with his, earning his attention.  “You can have that too, you know,” you say. “I mean, I don’t want to skip ahead, but I feel like things are going well here, despite the whole busted ankle thing.” 
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“It’s beautiful, but my God, how old is this thing?” “She. She’s a she.” “Oh, pardon me,” you say in amusement. “Do I have some competition here?” Dean gives you a teasing smirk. “Well, technically, she’s been with me a lot longer than you.” 
I'm literally cackling. I can hear Dean saying this to his significant other. Meeting Baby for the first time holds the same place in his heart as meeting Sam for the first time 🤣 ALSO, I wasn't ready for the palm kiss. Palm kisses and forehead kisses DESTROY me.
I like that this was an alternate ending to the dumpster fire that was the end of Supernatural. That it's Dean and his girl out on the open road listening to a Led Zeppelin song holding hands in the front seat of Baby was just beautiful in the best way and a perfect ending to this mini-series my wonderful friend!! I am going to miss this couple so much, but it really was a fitting end for them 🥰
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Against the Wind - Part 4
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Pairing: Alpha!Dean Winchester x F. Omega!Reader 
Summary: You wake up in a strange alpha’s cabin in the middle of a snowstorm, all with a busted ankle. He holds shadows in his eyes, even though his hands are gentle. There are iron shutters around his heart, even though he saved you. You might just save him in return.
AN: The grand finale...
Song Inspo: “Against the Wind” by Bob Seger
Word Count: 3.4K
Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! Smut, knotting, claiming, fluff and feels.
Series Masterlist || Bingo Masterlist
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Part 4: Running to Live
His cold hands are warming on your skin as he slides them underneath your sweater. They move smoothly up your back, bunching up the material. You break from his kiss only to help him get the sweater off you, followed closely by his pants.
Your sweatpants slide down your legs with just a sharp tug, baring most of your body to his gaze. His eyes drag over your exposed neck and shoulders, your breasts cupped in your bra, down to your panties and bare thighs.
A shiver runs through you, both from his heated gaze, and from being exposed to the cooler air. Even with the fire going and the heater running in the cabin, the frigid air outside is unforgiving.
You have no problem with the way Dean guides you down from the chaise to take advantage of your nest on the floor, right in front of the fire. He draws you into a sensuous kiss, sucking your lower lip into his mouth and grazing with teeth.
“Were you nesting, Omega?” he teases, between the sinful meetings of his lips with yours. You hum your affirmation before his tongue swipes across your lower lip, seeking entrance.
You open yourself to him in more ways than one; you slip your hands across his naked shoulders and explore the smooth planes of muscle, the dips and softness in between. You encourage him to lower down, to cover you with the length and broadness of his frame. His weight is a welcome one between your thighs and against the softness of your body.
“Was worried about you,” you whisper a confession against his lips. Dean briefly pauses, meeting your eyes.
“Thanks for waiting up,” he says, with a hint of a smile.
Your lips curve upwards in return. You reach up to caress his cheek, feeling the prickling of his stubble. Your fingers thread into his hair, and you pull him back down for a devouring kiss.
Dean’s brows furrow as he holds you to him, wanting to feel every part of your skin against his. His calloused fingers map their way down your side, and across your back to unhook your bra. His lips veer away from yours to burn a wet, heated trail along your neck. His teeth come out to graze your skin, down your throat, down the lovely valley between your breasts.
“Dean,” you gasp, encouraging him when his hand cups one of your breasts. He explores the other with his mouth, teasing a pebbled nipple with his tongue. Your fingers tighten in his hair, your thighs rubbing together between the cage of his knees in the mess of blankets. Already you feel slick forming at the apex of your thighs and slipping down in between.
“Beautiful,” he murmurs against your skin. “Fucking beautiful, you know that?”
You can’t help but smile. Your face warms either from the fire dancing shadows across your bodies, or from him, his attention, his warmth, and the heat in his eyes when they meet your again. His hand slides down your body, over your hip and squeezing your thigh as he opens you up further for him.
“Tell me what you want, Omega.” While I still have control, his tone implies. His voice is gravel and sin while his hand moves swiftly and smoothly up the inside of your thigh.
“Touch me,” you breathe.
Nodding, he hooks his fingers around the hem of your panties and slides them down. You help him kick them off. Afterward, his thumb brushes over your mound, making you sharply inhale and squeeze his shoulders encouragingly. His fingers dip inside your wet heat, his brows raising with a smirk, as he feels the sheer amount of your slick already coating his digits.
“Fuck. This all for me, baby?” he remarks.
You hold onto the back of his neck with both hands as you nod, biting your lip. Your hips begin to cant against his hand on reflex, urging him to touch you.
“Alpha, please…” you implore, in a ragged whisper. He swallows your plea with a ravaging kiss, but he still gives you what you want. His thumb circles your clit, earning a moan from you into his mouth.
Soon, two of his fingers plunge slowly inside you, working you open, drawing more gasps and shudders of pleasure from your body. His length continues to strain hard against your thigh, but for him, it’s worth it to draw every sound, every time your body writhes and arches against him, craving release.
With a few more purposeful strokes, your inner walls clamp tight on his hand, and a flood of slick coats his knuckles even more. You gasp his name, your hands squeezing his arms just as tight as your pussy around his fingers.
Your skin is beginning to get dewy with sweat, and he kisses some of it off you when he trails down your chest. You stroke down his arms, down his back, whatever you can reach as you catch your breath. But then, his name falls from your lips with a firmer tone.
Dean raises his head, and you gently push at his chest. His brows furrow in confusion, only for it to be replaced with a smile of surprise when you curl a thigh over his hip and guide him onto his back. His head just manages to fall on one of your pillows, but he still utters a small grunt. You giggle down at him, bowing to meet him for a kiss.
He smirks and holds onto your hips, playfully squeezing your ass. “My wily omega.”
“Thought I was your cheeky omega,” you tease.
He snorts. “That too.”
You giggle some more as you treat him to the same path of open-mouthed kisses down his neck. Except this time, you hook a hand behind his neck, and you trail your tongue around his mating gland. You feel his jolt of surprise, as well as his instinctive growl of pleasure in response to his mate. Or at least, not yet…
His heart pounds in his chest.
“Omega,” he says, a warning not to tease as his grip tightens on your hips.
The command in his voice makes you shiver, but you smile and nuzzle his cheek in affection. You kiss your way down his body, playing special attention to his nipples, his stomach, the soft V and the happy trail of light brown fuzz leading you down between his hips.
Your fingers slide down his hardened desire through his underwear, earning a grunt from him, along with a shifting of his body against the blankets. Your lips curve as you nuzzle him there as well, letting your lips drag across his impressive length.
His fingers tangle in your hair when you hook your nails around the waistband and free his cock from its confines. His boxers join the rest of your clothes somewhere, and finally you get to see all of him, as much as he takes in all of you. Your hand wraps around his girth, your thumb circling around the sensitive, weeping head of it. Dean groans, a sound from deep in his chest.
You don’t know this, but it’s been a while since anyone but his own hand has touched him. That’s not the only reason his body has been calling to yours, but it plays a part in how fucking good it feels, and how much more he wants you.
He feels your intentions when your hand moves down his shaft in a teasing caress, your fingers tracing around his knot. A shudder rattles down his spine, makes his desire burn hotter in the pit of his stomach.
He can’t fucking take it anymore. He needs you, needs to be inside you. Needs to take you the way his instincts demand.
He grasps your shoulder before you put your mouth on him. You blink up at him, with a question forming on your lips, but he hefts you up onto his chest by your arms. He cages you there with a kiss filled with abject need.
“I can’t. Can’t wait anymore,” he says. He drags his fingers through your folds and earns another moan from your when he finds your clit. “You ready for me, Omega? Need my knot?”
“Yeah,” you nod, agreeing against his lips. “Need you, Alpha—”
No sooner had the words escaped your lips, when Dean rolls you back underneath him. But this time, he guides you onto your stomach, then raises up your hips, until you’re on your hands and knees. You catch your breath as you regain your bearings, shooting an incredulous smile over your shoulder at Dean. He smirks back at you, but his gaze is intense, his pupils darkened with the alpha inside him. 
Still, he soothes a hand down your back and steadies you with a hold on your hip. You feel him slot himself behind you, guiding his cock at your entrance. His chest presses hotly against your back.
“Last chance, Omega,” he says, his voice tight with restraint.
You look back at him again over your shoulder, your mouth threatening to frown. You reach back and sink your fingers into his hair with a sharp tug. “Do it.”
He sinks into you with one smooth plunge. It’s a relief for both of you, your mingled moans echoing in the near silence. All that’s left is the sound of your quickening breaths, of skin against sweat-slick skin as you move together.
Dean brushes your hair away from your neck. He kisses and licks his way along your bare shoulder, and finally the back of your neck. You’re trembling by the time his lips find the sensitive flesh of your mating gland. It echoes with the pulsing from your core as he continues to drive into you.
“Alpha,” you gasp on reflex. You squeeze his arm; he has it wrapped tight around your middle. Your pleasure builds ever closer to that crescendo, especially as his thrusts become ragged, at an angle that zips delicious tingles through your core. “Close…just…I need…”
Dean isn’t so far gone. He hears you, and helps you, reaching his hand around to strum his fingers insistently on your clit, along with his final thrusts.
Finally, it tumbles you over. Your inner walls become impossibly tight around him as he draws out your second release—one that triggers his own. Dean groans into your ear; his knot swells and locks into place, and he spends himself deep inside you. He pants hot against your neck, but even though he fastens his lips there, he hesitates, once again making you shudder. 
“Do it,” you repeat, in a coarse whisper. You’re close to tears. “Please. Want you, Alpha. Need you…”
Once again, he hears you.
His teeth sink into the back of your neck, making you cry out. But your pain is quickly overshadowed by a deepest pleasure, thrumming along with his.
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 Afterward, Dean holds you in his arms. The warm glow of the fire paints your skin in its light, despite the utter darkness in the rest of the house. 
While you both wait for his knot to subside, you revel in the fact that you know he’s content. You can feel it through the newly formed bond. He traces random shapes in your skin, which still glistens with a fine sheen of sweat. The fire he stoked doesn’t help to cool you down, but you don’t care.
Nothing else matters but this. You turn your head toward him over your shoulder. He meets you there with a gentle kiss, much more gentle than any other you’ve shared before. It feels right. 
When he parts from you, he presses another kiss to your forehead. Then he leans back a little and sighs. You feel his thumb trace the raw flesh around the claiming mark on your neck. A small shiver runs through your body. Maybe on another day, you’ll mark him in return.
“It’s too damn late,” he says, breaking the silence. “You realize that right?”
You shoot him a frown. “Too late for what?”
“For me to let you go,” he says. 
His words both warm you and make you sad. Just how little does he think of himself?
“Dean,” you say, endeavoring to be patient. “You’re my true mate. Do you know how rare it is that we’ve actually found each other?”
Dean remains quiet.
“And after everything you’ve done for me,” you add, “how can I not think you’re a good man? How can I not think this is right?”
He seems to consider your question. His gaze briefly falls, then meets your eyes again.
“You don’t know me that well,” is his answer, with a wry turn of his lips. 
You reach back to caress his cheek. “Then tell me. Tell me about, um…tell me about how you became a hunter. From your dad’s journal, I got the sense that it’s a family thing.”
A vendetta, you wanted to say, but you keep that thought inside.
Dean chuckles, dropping another kiss onto your shoulder. You feel the pleasurable rasp of his stubble.
“Yeah, more like a family business,” he says. 
He tells you why John Winchester started writing in that journal in the first place. Dean explains it in his own words, of what his family was before and after a demon broke into his brother’s nursery. Your heart continues to break for him, over and over, the more story he tells. Your shock can only reach new heights when he tells you about angels and demons and everything in between. 
There are moments where he pauses, needing the time to find his words. He’s talked for so long that his knot finally softens, allowing you to withdraw from him, just to turn in his arms and be able to see his face. He bundles you in the blankets to keep you warm, but he also keeps you close, with a loose arm around your waist as he continues. 
You sense that he’s not telling you everything. How could he? A lifetime of blood and wins and incredible losses; family gained, and family lost, endless saves, and so many near misses. You listen with rapt attention (and a lot of shock) to everything he can share, but your heart twinges when you see how he struggles to talk about his mother’s most recent death. Then his best friend Cas. 
You realize that this man, for all his self-deprecation, is a hero. More so than you already knew.
“After the whole Chuck thing was done, I thought we’d just…go back to status quo. Me and Sam against the world, you know?” Dean says. He gives a rueful smile. “Then Sammy tells me he knocked up his mate.”
You smile. “You’re happy for him though.”
“Course I am,” Dean nods. “He never thought he’d get to have all that. A badass chick who can keep him on his toes, a house, the kid, the whole damn thing. He’s downright respectable again.”
His brotherly pride and his humor are tinged with something else though. You think you begin to understand. His losses have weighed him down, leaving him aimless and living in that in between, not unlike the ghosts he used to hunt. You know the feeling. 
You thread your fingers with his, earning his attention. 
“You can have that too, you know,” you say. “I mean, I don’t want to skip ahead, but I feel like things are going well here, despite the whole busted ankle thing.” 
Dean slowly smiles, shaking his head. He brings your hand up to his lips. 
“Okay, enough about my Hallmark movie life. What about you?” he asks. 
So you tell him. 
You two continue to share and explore, both in words and with your bodies, until morning comes. 
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It’s another week in the cabin before Dean insists on helping you down the mountain. Your ankle has gotten a little better, but at this point, you need to see a doctor. It takes a couple of days, going as slow as you need to. He ends up carrying you for most of the way anyway. You tell him over and over that he doesn’t have to, but your alpha is stubborn. 
Once he gets you back to the city, you two take a shuttle to the nearest hospital. X-rays are taken, and you get a new cast for your officially fractured ankle. At the very least, you don’t need surgery. You’re able to call your mom from there and let her know where you’ve been, that you’re all right, and best of all…that you’ve found your mate. 
You cry along with her on the phone, this time for a good reason. The best reason. 
When you’re eventually released from the hospital, Dean picks you up in a sleek, black Chevy that has your eyes wide. 
He grins at the look on your face. “Hey, sweetheart. Come meet my Baby.” 
He parks the car and keeps the heater running while he comes around to you in swift strides. He takes your crutches and slides them into the backseat, then helps you into the passenger seat. 
“It’s beautiful, but my God, how old is this thing?”
“She. She’s a she.”
“Oh, pardon me,” you say in amusement. “Do I have some competition here?”
Dean gives you a teasing smirk. “Well, technically, she’s been with me a lot longer than you.” 
You scoff incredulously. He laughs and takes your hand, pressing a kiss into your palm. You discreetly study him and marvel at how much lighter he seems. You don’t know how much is because of this, what your hand in his symbolizes, and how much is because he’s reunited with something important to him. 
“It’s okay, Omega mine,” he says, with a measure of desire in his eyes. “From now on, you’re my priority.”
Your spine prickles with the same arousal you can feel from him through the bond. You lean across the way and share a thorough kiss. 
Until a horn honks loudly from behind. You both jolt, but Dean’s face falls into annoyance. He shoots up a choice finger at the car behind him in the rearview mirror. You laugh as he begins to peel out of the curved pick-up and drop-off zone in front of the hospital. 
“Where are we going, Dean?” you ask, still smiling in amusement. 
“Wherever we damn well please.” He turns to you with a hint of a smile reforming on his lips. “Want me to take you back home? We can sort out the logistics on, uh…well, this.”
You think about it. He poses a good idea, but at the same time, you’re not quite ready for this part of the adventure to end. 
“How long has it been since you’ve seen Sam?” you ask.
Dean blinks at your question. He whistles lowly. “About a year. Jesus, since my nephew was born.”
You smile and reach over, resting your hand on his thigh. 
“Let’s go see him, then,” you say. “I want to meet your family. Then you can meet mine.”
After that, you two can figure out the rest, like where to live, and how you’ll live. 
Dean raises a brow. ��Really? That’s like, a thirteen-hour drive.”
You shrug. “I’ve always wanted to go on a real road trip. Can we get some food first though? I’m starving.” 
He laughs and nods as he stops the car at a red light.
“What do you know? A woman after my own heart,” he says. His amusement eases into a gentler smile the longer he stares at you. You smile back, and you give into the urge to lean in again, meeting your lips with his. He brushes your cheek tenderly with his thumb. 
“I know what this needs,” he says lowly. Your brows draw together in a silent question. 
He pulls away to reach into the side compartment along the driver door. He fishes out a cassette tape labelled Zeppelin IV. You bite your lip and try not to say anything smartassed.
Damn, this man is old school. 
He skips ahead until he finds Track 7, just as the light turns green. A melodious guitar riff fills the car as he turns onto the main road with your hand wrapped in his. 
Made up my mind to make a new start.
Going to California with an aching in my heart…
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AN: And that's all, folks! 🥹 I truly hope you enjoyed Against the Wind!
Like I said in a recent update, I have more stories in store for you guys. January 3 will be Part 1 of Outlander -- sequel to The Honorable Choice -- a Western AU with Dean as our resident cowboy! I'll post a sneak peek on that one soon.~
But in the meantime, I hope you'll let me know what you thought of ATW! 💜💜
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yoichiin · 2 days ago
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isagi yoichi's fluff alphabet !! (from a to k)
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as stated, it's a fluff alphabet for isagi!
no notable warnings. gn!reader. fluff. second person pov.
note : first post !! i kind of repeat myself im ngl but it's okay probably. also no j because i couldn't think of anything sillying
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a is for activities (what does he do in his free time with you?) :
isagi is somewhat of a simpleton. his life is eat, sleep, soccer so the things he does with you reflect that. if you feel like switching it up, you’ll have to tell him directly.
when he does have free time with you, quiet cozy days in or spontaneous brunches on the weekends are his go-tos. they’re simple, yes, but with yoichi, less is always more. he isn’t the type of person to find value in super extravagant outings and in his mind, the memories that ring loudest are the mundane things that no one else seems to remember. so even though his heart aches when you don’t recall the late night conversations when he fell in love with you for the first time, isagi doesn’t mind. the warm winter naps and simple mornings over not-very-luxurious breakfasts may melt like snowflakes in your memory but as long as you’re content in that moment, it’s all he could ask for.
b is for beauty (what does he find most beautiful in a partner? what is his favorite part, inside and out?):
the simple answer that yoichi says is someone with a nice smile and laughs a lot. the real answer is a bit more complicated. 
as someone who has observed and analyzed his whole life, he’s noticed the kind of glow joy seems to have on people. from the small perk of the shoulders to laughing so hard you feel like throwing up—this phenomena sings to isagi. the existence of real, visible, audible emotion.
when he’s on the pitch with his teammates there’s a fire in every one of their eyes—all-consuming like the sun. it’s that light that pulled him into blue lock in the first place. the joy of victory, of evolution and change. seeing all of these emotions on someone’s face is yoichi’s favorite thing about human connection and he treasures it with his life. 
(and he likes thighs too, i guess.)
c is for comfort (how does he help his s/o when they’re sad or overwhelmed?):
it’s a nice surprise that isagi’s soccer awareness translates well into relationships. he can assess your state immediately and run to your side and comfort you with verbal affirmations. his words are so real and from the depths of his soul, it’d almost be an insult to call them sweet nothings. 
yoichi’s feelings come out as easy as gentle wind upon autumn leaves, even philosophical at times. if you weren’t overwhelmed by your own emotions, you’d be racking your brain a bit trying to figure out his. it gets theoretical to the point where it flies over your head but that’s how you know it’s genuine. no matter how he layers his words, his intentions remain clear. “it is a privilege learning to understand you.”
d is for dreams (how do they picture a future with their s/o?):
before isagi got with you, he had never imagined being in a relationship. not like he didn’t want one but it just slipped his mind. his first love is soccer, through and through. he thought he never needed anything else.
still, his vision has always been simple. win the world cup, become the greatest striker in the world, and now you’re there too. when you’re with such a simpleton, he’ll always have space for you in his future and now that he’s got you, you’re never leaving.
e is for equal (are they the dominant one in the relationship or passive?):
as much as i want to be self-indulgent and say that isagi would be submissive, i think he leans towards being dominant in a relationship.
perhaps before blue lock, when he was unsure of his ideals, he’d follow his partner with no question. but that’s not the person he wants to be. now that blue lock has reassured the things he’s been thinking for years, he likes being in control, leading, and making decisions. he doesn’t disrespect you or dismiss you, of course, but yoichi feels most secure when he voices his opinions freely and decides things for himself. yoichi can lose sight of you at times because of this so your relationship might have to be negotiated to be more equal but in a way where he doesn’t have to compromise his values.
f is for fight (how does he argue? how do you work through your problems?):
while isagi is good at voicing his thoughts, he’s a little too good. his thoughtful words and passionate soccer theories can quickly turn into paralyzing venom when he’s angry and it comes out in hyper-specific insults that pierce some of your deepest insecurities. fights happen infrequently but when they’re bad, they’re bad. he’s not so stubborn that he’ll drag on a fight but he says things so out of turn, it leaves you needing space.
recovering after these arguments takes a lot of time and talking and trying your hardest to understand each other. it’s hard to make sense of everything isagi is thinking because he thinks so much, but know, after all is said and done, he wants you two to come out of these fights stronger.
gentle (how gentle is he, physically or emotionally?):
as good as he is with his words, isagi doesn’t really know much about physical affection. he’s gentle the way a child takes care of a pet or baby, cautious and a bit eager. you can feel his nerves travel up your spine as he hesitantly puts a hand on the small of your back to hold you. though awkward, it just makes it even more endearing.
h is for honesty (what’s something he keeps secret? any rules for honesty?):
isagi doesn’t have any specific rules when it comes to honesty. obviously, he wants you to trust him but if there’s something you want to keep to yourself, it’s fine with him and he’ll do the same. 
i is for inspiration (a trait about him that you might look up to):
how much he thinks. isagi’s mind is an endlessly growing puzzle—a garden of ideas and theories he’s been nurturing like he’s been at it for fifty years. you watch him in awe as he sits studying a match, eyes slightly squinted and nose all scrunched up. yoichi’s constantly redefining and reorganizing his thoughts and you can’t help but giggle when you say something random and he perks up with what you’re sure is a fresh idea. his drive is a beacon not just for his rivals but for you as well.
k is for kiss (what was the first kiss like?):
i imagine your first kiss is after a match. isagi has shot the winning goal and both of you are full of excitement and adrenaline you don’t realize what you’re doing. after swimming past all of his teammates surrounding him and seeing you in the front stands, he’s so overwhelmed he pulls you in for a kiss. it’s warm, exceedingly so, and a little awkward, noses softly bumping against each other. yoichi’s hair is somewhat stringy from his sweat while his face glistens under the stadium lights as you realize what has just happened.
truth be told, he’d been stressing himself out wanting to kiss you and he revealed he’d have rather done it in a smaller, more secluded place but his red cheeks while he bashfully explains himself is too cute that you go in for another peck between his brows.
fin.
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thetepes · 16 hours ago
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I feel like a lot of people don’t realize that most of the people in the Lily crit community are actually pretty forgiving and tolerant? Like I’ve seen you guys have pretty stark disagreements and be normal about it. You seem pretty chill about everything except CSA and bigotry which is very reasonable.
That's how I see us? I mean, we aren't a monolith. We have no leader, we don't even all have one place we talk. There have been fights and disagreements, but even after them we can shake it off and keep on keeping on. We're adults. That's how you adult. Shock of shocks, but not every minor social spat is worth a hate server and a callout post even if you can't talk it out.
We all have our tolerance levels, like mine is lower than let's say Liquid's. There have plenty of times Liquid has been very understanding and willing to see a more sympathetic side of things where I've said "No, fuck off. I refuse to give grace here, this is clearly malicious." and I think that's good!? We need people like Liquid and we need people like me because without one or the other you either become too forgiving or too unforgiving. Together we all strike a balance and together we all can see different perspectives giving us an edge up few other movements of this nature have and what ultimately leads them to failing while we're still here.
Us also being from all walks of life, countries, and nationalities helps in other ways too. We're a rare group of people who can bypass the social fears present online and point out behavior that's genuinely dangerous and unacceptable without being susceptible to buzzwords and we know better than to except these demented excuses. No. it's not inherently trans to be a groomer. No, it's not inherently lgbtq to be attracted to animals and children. No, it's not inherently anything ever for any reason to be racist, xenophobic, or any other damn thing. Being a minority of any stripe doesn't make what people like Lily and Patty are doing ok.
Hot take, but I'm perfectly willing to go "Hey, this person's apologized and they've changed their behavior so let's move on. We're done here." Issue is, Lily has never and will never do those things and she's done enough heinous shit where even if she did? It's too late.
If she, at the beginning, had said "I was wrong, I'm sorry. I'll change" then actually DONE THAT. Not carried on for years, making worse and worse and more hateful content - so many of us would not be here. Her past would have been resigned to a 15 page thread on Kiwifarms that hasnt been active in years like so many others, but she didn't do that.
So we're here. Talking about her and the other freaks like her now too. Sorry to ramble so much at you.
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red-cicada · 5 hours ago
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Okay idk if you guys care about my ideas at all but I do. \
Basically at this point I think these foos are just turning into my own version of reanimator ( not everything I draw of them is supposed to be taken seriously I just want yall to know that, like there is work I think of as true to my own story and the ones that are just for fun! )
Some other changes or things I think about for if i made a reanimator uhh show or interpretation whatever its called.
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First I would make Francesca Peruvian I just would don't ask me why.
Dan and Herbert of course have some homoerotic stuff going on and things that defiantly question their relationship with each other but the ONLY time that they ever had some sort of sexual relationship is when they where in Peru. Its just very common in war for men to engage in homosexual relationships and this is the only time i think it would make sense ( this of course tho would be brough up in later times during what would be in the bride timeline )
Dan would of have been with Francesca long before even the idea of making the bride, and when the bride is in the process of being created he would start to pull away from Francesca leading her to going into their home and finding their lab and experiments ect:
I know some of you hate this idea but I would have Dan betray Herbert and turn him into the police, He would then later regret his choice because Francesca wont stay with him (obviously), meg is dead, the bride didn't work, because of the case he's lost his job and medical license he's lost everything. So he would try to get Herbert back or forgive him in some way ( like those prison pages I made except it wouldn't be until very late into the trails when dan regrets his choice, and the one that's kinda jokey but kinda not where dan tries multiple times to set up a visitation ) I can elaborate on this part further if you guys are interested in what I have to say.
There would be a lot more time of Herbert in prison and how that's effected him, like his eating pattern changing, he's a lot more clean and organized, he's more struck with pattern and time ect: AND would make it more clear that Herbert DID get physically stronger in prison, most prison systems have some sort of mandatory labor, and also as much as folks don't like to think about the violence that happens in prisons Herbert would be a big time criminals and some people are going to want to test that Herbert would have to find a way to protect himself. ( he's also just annoying people are going to want to beat him up )
Oh and also I feel like ( at least I haven't seen any ) folk don't speak about how being attacked by reanimated corpses, the experiments, war, and being in prison would have given Dan AND Herbert serious PTSD, and I would personally love to explore that idea. One of the things i loved in the original reanimator is that Herbert was constantly paranoid about his first reanimated corpse coming back to kill him.
ANYWAYS that's all my though for now, I have a lot more but everything's mixed up, I need to make a timeline and write down my ideas in a more organized way.
they should make a show like Hannibal but for re-animator, and they should let me direct and write and also let me play Herbert West
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hope-inthedark · 19 hours ago
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Good Omens, My Life, and My Soon-To-Be-Wife: A Tumblr Love Story
I joined Tumblr in 2019, shortly after I discovered a mini-series about an angel and a demon and the not-really-end of the world. I was consumed by it, by the story and the characters and the love that ran underneath it all, and so I came to Tumblr to find a community of people who felt the same.
What I was not expecting to find was the love of my life, but here we are.
J and I met through a mutual friend (hi, @ineffablefool ) who had recommended my fics on his blog often enough that J decided to read them. Soon enough, I started noticing repeated comments from one particular user on many of my fics, and I found myself looking forward to reading what this person thought of new chapters and works. J eventually messaged me on Tumblr, we became friends, and later on, we became more than that.
I’ll spare you the ins and outs of our relationship (because I am, and always will be, fairly private about my real life/name/identity when it comes to my fandom life), but know this: in more than 5 years of knowing J, and in nearly 4 of being in a romantic relationship with them, I have come to know and understand what it means to love another person with your entire being. I have learned so much about patience and grace, and I have laughed so much more and generally been so much happier in this phase of my life than in any one before it. I cannot wait to see what the future holds for us. Our relationship has spanned many years and many more miles, even stretching across an ocean as we’ve both navigated trans-Atlantic journeys that have lead to us finding a home together (at last). Edinburgh has been as good a home to me as I have ever had, and it’s been even better since J has been here with me.
So when J and I took a trip to London this past weekend to celebrate our engagement, we went to St. James’s Park. We found a bench, and we sat together on it, and we talked and thought about how absolutely mad and wonderful it is that Good Omens brought us here. It’s the love story that started ours, and there will always be part of me that is immensely glad that J and I found it when we did.
(There’s been a lot of talk lately about whether we as a fandom should continue to support and love Good Omens in light of the actions of one of its creators. To that I say: do what feels right to you. If you need to step away, I understand.
But to those of you who, like me, choose to remain in the fandom, know this: Good Omens is as much ours as it ever was his. We can claim the love we have found here, and we can celebrate it. We can mourn what we have lost while being grateful for what we have. And we can look forward to a happy ending, together, because it is what we - and Aziraphale and Crowley - have always deserved.)
I’ll sign off now and leave the rest of my sappy monologuing for my fiancée to handle. Thanks for listening.
And to @shesthewindandsea, my dearest love: cheers, darling. To the world, and to our happy ending.
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ceedak · 3 days ago
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can we get a ceedak timeline 🤔 i feel like there’s a lot idk abt them fr 😭😭
yes u absolutely can i could talk about them forever and ever 🥳🥳
disclaimer: i do wanna say this is just from what i’ve gathered because i didn’t become super fixated on nfl rpf until last year </3 one day i’ll do a legit deep dive like an insane person and update with all my findings…
second disclaimer: im delusional yes and a part of me straight up thinks that they’ve had to have hooked up at least once bc i love to psychoanalyze people i'll never meet but i’ll make sure to say when i’m being fully delusional KSDJFHSKDS
putting it under a read more because i’m sure it’ll be much longer than necessary
also i will reblog this and add links to some videos!!
SO before i get into like when ceedee was drafted and such i wanna talk about how invisible string coded they are because i love shit like this sm
both were born in louisiana only about an hour and a half apart from each other until ceedee moved to texas as a child after hurricane katrina hit (he’s said he’s moved around a couple of times as kid in interviews before)
dak went to mississippi st. in college and ceedee’s dream school was LSU (rival colleges… 🚬) but he had committed to oklahoma (also they wouldn’t have met or anything in college anyway because dak was drafted in 2016 and ceedee started playing in college in 2017 but i digress it makes my brain light up anyway lol)
when dak was drafted he was projected to go like late second round/early third round of the draft but 🗿 he got into some trouble beforehand (driving under the influence) and ended up falling to the 4th round (after the front office kept trying to trade up to get a different backup QB)
dak also had to compete for his spot as a backup and was named starter after romo was injured in 2016. this was dak’s rookie year and he led them to the playoffs - almost to the nfc championship game. after this he basically took the job from romo
okay so FAST FORWARD to the 2020 draft. ceedee was projected to go top 10 and he fell all the way to SEVENTEEN so the cowboys were able to grab him then (drafted bpa instead of for need)
idk all of this is just very <333 to me that so many things managed to fall into place just right and they managed to find each other on the same team out of THIRTY TWO teams it makes me weeeep 🤧 also just something else that i think is very cute because i truly am a little insane: ceedee was born april 8th and dak’s jersey number is 4 and ceedee’s is 88 so 4/8 ALL THE DOTS CONNECT SOMEHOW…
so we’ll go through a teensy bit about dak i suppose and then ceedee this won’t be too long
dak: baby of his family and has two brothers. his parents divorced when he was little and he was very close with his mom before she passed away in 2013 (he’s started a foundation since then for cancer research and suicide prevention/mental health). went to mississippi st, cowboys starter his rookie year, etc etc. he also lost his brother to suicide in 2020 and he’s said before he feels a responsibility to live on and carry his and his mom’s legacy throughout his life. he’s like suuuuuper underrated in the league i feel and a lot of cowboys fans are complete assholes to him all the time it makes me so mad cos they could literally never ever make me hate him - he makes me so weepy 😭😭😭 umm but yeah he’s donated a ton to children cancer funds too and donated during BLM protests and things like that - he won the walter payton man of the year award. he just had a baby and got engaged in october (remember for the yaoi LOL) ok im gonna stop here cause i don’t wanna rant too much lol
btw i know what you are dak prescott:
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ceedee: MY BELOVED… my favorite my absolute favorite. he has two brothers and two little sisters. idk if he’s the eldest or not tbh i see different things all the time that he’s the second eldest whatever not that important i guess. so blah blah college blah blah - he wears 88 on the team because that’s considered really special to the cowboys franchise and is reserved for elite receivers. idk he’s the most beautiful man ever and he does a lot of donating too - i know he participates in a lot of football youth camps a lot to help kids out and he likes to provide meals to families around thanksgiving and christmas time. a loooot of cowboys fans have criticized him for not being that much of a leader and pouting a lot on the sidelines (which he does sometimes… my mimir) but i think this last season he’s reaaaaallyyy taken a step into more of a leader type position especially with dak being out and he’s proven himself more than enough. he LOOOVES spending money on clothes it’s so cute… gonna be a sad day when the class war happens and i’m faced with cedarian lamb. ummm i also legit think he’s gay and closet is made of glass but whatever
see this is the problem i never stfu but okay CEEDAK what you actually asked about ksjdksjdks
PRE-2020 SEASON: this was before ceedee was drafted (some stuff i found last night) and this is what i mean when i say i haven’t done like a deep dive into these things bc i’m sure there’s soo much more but this kinda gives the general vibes
“I was like a little kid at the playground,” CeeDee tells us. (on the first time Dak texted him to invite him over to his house, says it was surreal.) august 21, 2020
and i actually hunted the exact clip down where he says this: (will reblog with link - skip to 4:25 he talks for like a minute or so - sorry the audio’s funky it’s because of covid so all the reporters weren’t in the room i’m pretty sure) DELUSIONS: you can’t tell me ceedee wasn’t nursing a crush here idgaf
2020 SEASON:
ceedee’s rookie year
personal stuff happened with dak before the season started - this is when he lost his brother to suicide and he’s been really outspoken about mental health since then. on top of that he broke his ankle during week 5 of the season (and tried to snap it back into place by himself on the field). dak was performing on like a sort of insane level before the injury happened so </3 what could’ve been and all that… the what-ifs of it all… so that year they weren’t able to play together as much
Oct 11, 2020: “CeeDee Lamb said he texted Dak as soon as he got out of the shower. Thanked him for everything he’s done for him and they were gonna hold it down for him until they see him on the field again.” (after the game dak got hurt in)
POST 2020 SEASON:
"He came back from his second surgery about two months ago so he’s walking around, rehabbing, doing everything right," Lamb said Wednesday. "It’s great to see, especially when you seen him go down. You saw the look in his eyes and you saw how sad he was and how much this game meant to him. Just to see him smiling again, happy again, being with his guys is a great deal."
"First day he kind of caught me by surprise with his arm strength," Lamb said. "He knows the little nuances of the game to be better. He makes it easy to follow him, if you will."
2021 SEASON
ceedee’s second year, he was in a WR room with amari cooper (currently on the bills) and michael gallup (now retired) blah blah season happened whateverrrr but AFTER this season the front office (i’ll always be mad about this lol) traded amari to the browns for a 5th round pick 💀 hence THIS!!! which i consider the #Real beginning of ceedak:
“Dak Prescott asked for CeeDee Lamb’s locker to be moved next to his: ‘My two other locker mates left, so I was a little lonely. With him being young, hopefully he’s my WR until I’m done playing. Just bring him closer, more conversations, he’s right there to talk and communicate.’”
said he had no doubt ceedee could become his "main guy"
here’s some fun stuff i found from 2021 too
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3hCmIZN-YI&ab_channel=DallasCowboys (7 min mark this was after a game winning td in overtime against new england)
“CeeDee Lamb on game-winning 35-yard TD: ‘It was the best feeling ever, honestly.’”
2022 SEASON:
https://youtu.be/T73xGDsFiVo?si=Qn_dwK1yfnHPiMya talks about dak here at 7:50 “all i need is him” 🤧
he’s actually said this a couple times lol he says shit like “we’re all we got” about each other - he’s said it this most recent season too so <3
dak injured his thumb this season though so he was out for like 7 weeks i think i can’t remember off the top of my head lol but again another season where they didn’t get to play much together
fun 2022 stuff:
“Last year, Cowboys caked Dak in the face on the field for his 28th birthday. On his 29th today, CeeDee told us they planned to do the same in the locker room. Hoped Dak would think he was safe after no cake on the field, and then locker room ambush.”
“Scene here: Dak was talking to us at his locker. CeeDee walks past wearing metallic red lens sunglasses indoors and eating chicken. Says the key to following up ass-kicking is ‘keep kicking ass.’”
“Dak on CeeDee’s vibe: Yeah, cool as hell - says ‘keep kicking ass’ while he’s eating.”
“Dak Prescott walked by during our interview with CeeDee Lamb - QB1: CeeDee’s that dude! / WR1: Happy birthday, Dak!”
link posted in reblog: skip to 2:30 he almost says he loves dak lol also very
2023: THE SEASON OF CEEDAK!!!
https://youtu.be/7_WRIzb5fPA?si=R0TETc2qtW0IOP5P the infamous "was gonna take him out for dinner tonight" clip is from this aka what got me hooked on ceedak lol (this interview is just so good in general i love ceedee sm - def recommend watching! such a nice look at his personality)
this is where my delusions take over i deadass think they hooked up at LEAST once around this time lol maybe end of 2022 season maybe early 2023 season IDK but anyway during this year the offense was soo wack for a couple of weeks until the bye week and then ceedee made some noise about it bc he felt like he wasn't being as utilized (which is true i'm so serious mccarthy was SUCH an annoying coach lol) but quotes:
“Cowboys WR CeeDee Lamb said Dak Prescott approached him and said: ‘If you have a problem with anything, just come up to me and we’ll talk about it.’ Lamb said he and Dak worked on getting on the same page their first day back in the building after the 49ers loss.”
Dak: ‘I mean, a frustrated player that feels like we all could’ve done better and feels like he can change the game, I understand it. I really do. So it’s in the sense of just communicating with him… CeeDee is a guy that I’ll never lose confidence in and trust who he is and understand why he’s frustrated. But at the end of the day, he’s a leader. It’s about him leading other guys and picking other guys up and him just trying to make sure we’re all pushing our best. That’s where the frustration is, we have to remove that. And he will. He’s a young player that’s growing by the day and he’ll only get better. He’ll be better because of that.’
but after they switched the offense around dak and ceedee went craaaazyyy - ceedee was named all pro, dak was in mvp talks (should have won it to be honest i'm sorry lamar i still love you <3) but 2023 cowboys will seriously haunt me forever lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sudQu72KDXs&ab_channel=NFLonFOX
DELUSIONS: dak announced he was having a baby like two weeks after this game SO let’s just say…. maybe…. perhaps… they were hooking up… ceedee probably knew before the public did - not saying that’s why he seems a little upset at the beginning of this clip cause who knows 🤷‍♀️ like i said DELUSIONS but… i can’t help it when the timeline timelines don’t shoot the messenger
also i do wanna mention that dak’s fiance follows a loooot of cowboys players on ig but she does not follow ceedee and he doesn’t follow her AGAIN just delusions…. but… iykyk 👀
sooo they were poppin off in 2023, ceedee was breaking records and shit, won nfc east, went to the playoffs and then i DON'T wanna talk about it i have my theories about wtf happened during that playoffs packers game but 💀💀 anyway the offseason before the 2024 season was genuinely the worst of my life because BOTH ceedee and dak had to get extended and jerry jones (who is the worst) waited until after training camp to get them both signed lol so ceedee wasn't participating in training camp at all which affected them in the beginning of the 2024 season which was a complete mess A MESS but here's some fun stuff after ceedee signed his extension/during that offseason
“Remarkable. That’s who CeeDee Lamb is. … He’s special. He’s just getting going and as long as I’m here, he’s gonna keep stacking these records year after year.”
“CeeDee Lamb strongly defended Dak: No one deserves the criticism that he gets. The way he gets talked about is crazy.”
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2023-2024 OFFSEASON:
worst months of my life lol ceedee was holding out for his new contract and didn’t get it signed until like… august i think? anddd dak was signed fucking three hours before kickoff the first week of the season lol i HATE this front office
but here’s some fun quotes after ceedee was signed:
CeeDee Lamb: “We were texting quite a bit. Obviously I missed being out there, competing with him… for is being so in tune together and all it takes is one text message or one conversation, one phone call… for us both… having the same passion for the game, same love for the game. I want what’s best for Dak and vice versa. Shout out to him too for getting that bag, too. We’ll be together for the next five years.”
Dak Prescott on CeeDee Lamb’s added muscle weight: “He’s wearing a lot more sleeveless shirts. As long as the speed is there, and it looks like it is (in practice), I’m fine with however big he is.” LMAO??
Dak Prescott: “I peeped the biceps. He’s wearing more sleeveless shirts now.”
Dak Prescott recently on CeeDee Lamb: “He’s talented. He works hard. He’s special. He’s the best receiver in the league for a reason. And I’ve seen Instagram videos. I know you’ve seen him. He’s working. And he works hard. So I have no angst, no worries about when he gets here that we’re not going to pick up where we left off. And when you're a stud like that and you’re smart like he is and you’re good at communicating, that makes that process that much easier. So it’s not like we’ve got to build something. We’ve got that. We just got to reignite it when he gets here.”
on how much ceedee worked with dak at the field at dak’s house even though he was staying away from the team: “Often. I would say quite often. Anytime that I’m back in town, and he’s obviously back here, I hit him and then… it’s very… good having a rich quarterback.”
Dak Prescott’s thoughts on the tandem of him and CeeDee Lamb being compared to legendary duos like Joe Montana and Jerry Rice: “I think that says a lot just cause we’ve only done it for four years and you just named some of those duos that did it for their whole careers. But then again, I feel like we can be better than all of them… so love the comparisons, they sound good and all, but hopefully one day people are saying these next duos and next tandems can be like me and CeeDee.” (i will kms over this quote one day)
i’m sure there’s things i’m missing but this is already sooooo long lol so
2024 SEASON:
WORST SEASON OF MY LIFEEEEEE / ceedak angst era
the front office set this team up to fail and let like a ton of players walk in the offseason, didn’t use free agency, injury riddled team, had a bunch of rookies starting but anyway just gonna go game by game really quick because this is when i was locked tf in and it’s more recent so ?? more detail seems alright when it's necessary also i wrote so many half-finished post-game fics this season to cope with how terrible it was i’m cryingggg it was insane
cowboys vs browns: i was at this game :) good game they won
cowboys vs saints: blocked this game out actually!!!
cowboys vs ravens: fake ass comeback also the game ceedee CRASHED OUT on the field lskdjslkdjsskjdsk which is so funny bc i literally love lamar sm and was so excited to watch but… my players wanted to make me MISERABLE
this was said a day or two after the game by ceedee (bc he fumbled during it and then wasn't there for post game media people andddd was yelling at dak on the sideline 🗿)
“Our relationship has, if anything, gotten stronger. Don’t let what, what’s out there fool you. We’re brothers to the end. We know that we all we got, and I tip my hat off to him. I got the utmost respect for him.”
“So with that being said, everything is gonna come out - the energy, the passion, the love, the fight - and then we’ll make up in the end. So no, no craziness now. Don’t.”
dak also said something about his rhythm with ceedee being a “rare feeling” which… okay internalized homophobia but i CANNOT for the life of me find the actual quote i’ve searched through my gallery but it’s not there </3 if i find i’ll add later (i’m pretty sure it was after the baltimore game but i can’t remember)
cowboys vs giants: this is a tremicah game no need to mention ceedak idt - nasty ugly win but whatever
cowboys vs steelers: dak prescott giving me a heart attack 12 fucking times during this game
cowboys vs lions: don’t wanna talk about it! i’m a hater! always will be sorry!!! ben johnson statpadding on my sorry ass terrible team i was SICKKKKK
BYE WEEK: my trials and tribulations…. my nfl rpf…
CeeDee Lamb on getting in some extra work with Dak Prescott during their bye week: “We love our bye weeks. We took advantage of it. We got right. We used every opportunity to get better and I feel like it’s going to show. We got on some routes, and obviously the timing is everything. We needed that.”
now ummm this is the week dak got engaged so. which is really funny because after the announcement post on ig ceedee went GHOST on instagramksjdjks like i went back to check because i’m crazy (these are delusions btw) and he had been posting like once a week… maybe once every two weeks PRETTY consistently like for at least a couple of months but after the engagement happened there was pretty much nothing for like… almost two months?? ummm which AGAIN i’m not saying anything i’m not insinuating anything buuuuut…… buuuuut….. also it’s really fucking funny because in this same interview ceedee dropped that he left the country during the bye week but didn’t post it on socials at all so i’m like ohhhh… you’re coping w the engagement… i see LMAO anyway
cowboys vs 49ers: sigghhhh….. lets get into it
SO this was a loss but two ceedee touchdowns.. i’m leaving with something!!!
“Yeah, I found CeeDee,” Prescott said when reflecting back on Lamb’s breakout in the Bay Area. “He did a good job of getting open, running all of his routes hard no matter where he was, if he was the one or if he was backside on a concept. Loved his intentionality in the game. He kind of said something like that to me during the game, midway through the game, like ‘Yeah, we’re back.’ And that was before, I think, his two touchdown drives. So just him even playing with that confidence, communicating that, it gives me a lot of confidence.”
super hopeful right maybe they'll really connect again and things'll be fine LOL
cowboys vs falcons: worst game ever dak tore his hamstring off the bone like a fucking idiot and ceedee sprained his AC joint and would not stop going back out into the game i was ready to kms
cowboys vs eagles: not talking about it idc
cowboys vs texans: loss because ofc but whatever ceedak hugged before the game tho so i didn’t gaf about the loss - i can’t find the clip rn but if i do i’ll post it
cowboys vs commanders: this is when i accepted they were tanking and then they decided to just be elite for whatever reason lol made me so happy though ceedee was so happy <33
cowboys vs giants: whatever
cowboys vs bengals: worst fucking game of my life nothing to do with ceedak but one of my other fave player’s (i also ship him w ceedee idgaf) knee EXPLODED so that was so much fun to deal with
cowboys vs panthers: i still can’t believe bryce young decided to forget how to play football in this game im crying
cowboys vs tampa: again they just wanted to be elite for whatever reason
cowboys vs: eagles: don’t wanna talk about it idc
cowboys vs commanders: WHATEVER thanks for the 12th draft pick ashton jeanty you will be a cowboy
SO. that’s basically where everything's at lmfao worst season EVERRRRR with ceedak ANGST um but yeah hopefully 2025 will be better... i’m cautiously optimistic because their old coach is finally FINALLY gone because he was really limiting them and their ability you know? 2023 season was amazing and then 2024 started and it was like… mccarthy just reverted back to his old scheme that wasn’t working. it was really annoyingksdkskds. but the new coach (despite it seeming like a silly hire) had a decent press conference (that ceedee didn’t attend bc he was playing around in paris LOL) andddd he seems to be setting up a nice staff around him so hopefully hopefully hopefully 2025 is a lot better and ceedak will save me again… can’t wait for training camp omg
anyway if u read all this i’m SO sorry i hope it’s… expansive enough?? i wanted to include kind of how it’s been through the years and i had a lot more to add for 2023/2024 because that’s when my adhd was just like Yea let’s hyperfixate on this so. been stuck here for awhile and i’ll probably be stuck here for years and years and years <3
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quiet-admirer · 2 months ago
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Friendly reminder: just because someone participates in a kink space doesn't mean they want kink directed at them personally. Just because you've talked with someone before, whether about kink or not, doesn't mean they want kink directed at them personally or that they want to get kinky with you. Even with someone who you've had kinky interactions with in the past, it's always a good idea to ask first if they're in the mood for a kinky chat or want to receive belly pics or hear about your boner.
Because maybe they do! And then you're interacting with someone who's on the same wavelength as you and you're more likely to get the actual interaction you're looking for! And if they're not into it then you can skip over the awkward conversation or being left on read and you can keep it moving and keep reaching out to find people who actually are into it and interested :)
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saintadeline · 18 hours ago
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More vague thoughts on this since this is getting more attention than I thought:
I see this one a Lot in music circles lately too, the whole "women and fems" groups, and self described "queer fem artists". Woman and Man are already arbitrary social constructs but in the eyes of cis people they still have a basis in the biologic (absolute bullshit but i'm trying to get to their level to make my point clearer), feminine and masculine however are 100% complete social constructs even to them and are words that are So arbitrary that the definition for them varies from person to person, so even as a basis you can see how an issue would arise by trying to refer to broad groups of people with your one arbitrary term that nobody but you knows the definition of. And half the time they don't even realize that their definition doesn't add up, what counts as a feminine person to you? When you talk about fems, do you talk about cis women? Do you include trans women? If so then why define fem experiences by stuff like pregnancy and periods? Do you consider trans women "masc" in your arbitrary new binary? Or are you choosing to degender them again? And if you don't use fem in that way (it's a start), then what about trans women that you wouldn't deem "fem enough"? Where do you draw your own arbitrary line with the word fem, which transfems are you excluding? And in the other much less common way around (because it's always about unchecked or ignored transmisogyny first and foremost please do not forget this), do you include feminine cis men? Aren't they fem by definition? And when you talk about "fem experiences", do you include trans men? Are you misgendering them for no reason? What about cis women butches? They're included in the experiences/oppressions you describe but they're literally not fem, are you just disrespecting their identity? "More fem artists" so no butches? So i'm just as oppressive as a cis man? "Bloodborne is about femininity" so butch icon lady maria is excluded from that societal critique of the patriarchy? Fem and Masc are extremely flimsy terms that should not be used to define anything that isnt related to the social constructs around them, and even then, they're not catch-all terms because femininity and masculinity are based on the culture around you and you just end up enforcing eurocentric social constructs on everything you try to talk about. I have my own qualms with the terms transmasc and transfem by pure definition, theres no alternative to them so obviously I'm fine with them and use them but I wish we werent in a world where we had to use those to define experiences. (In the same way i wish the word androgynous wasnt used the way it is) In my beautiful world there should not be "masculine" or "feminine" traits because sure it feels good for a transmasc on hrt to have their voice called masc, but what does that mean about trans women who don't voice train? If you deem a trait brought on by hrt as masc or fem, what does that mean you think of the person of the opposite gender transition experience (? Is there a term for that) who "still has those" or doesnt want to get rid of them. Idk. Also seriously what is it with "progressive" tme people (i'm tme so please stop me if I'm ever overstepping/said something weird. I would like to be corrected if so) trying so hard to include trans men and transmascs in what they'd usually dub "women's experiences" (usually either about biological shit like pregnancy once again. Just use "people with vaginas/wombs/people able to get pregnant" or whatever im begging you. Or it's about societal oppression -> idk even just saying "women and people percieved as women by society" works better) that they end up finding a whole new way to be transmisogynistic about it. How does soulsborne have one of the biggest trans communities i know of and yet people will go out of their way to be the most weirdly transphobic possible. We need to start being literal about definitions again and instead of using catch-all buzzwords we need to just describe more specifically what we're talking about. make longer sentences i dont care. I dont fucking know
My one Too Online post for the month but seriously does anyone else despise the way fem and masc are becoming the new hashtag inclusive way of saying woman and man. This is about trans stuff but this is also about when we get sentences like "bborne is about femininity" no the fuck it is not? It's about pregnancy and women's role in a patriarcal society yes. But that's not what femininity is. That's not what the word feminine even means.
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dazais-guardian-angel · 10 months ago
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kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....
#bungou stray dogs#been thinking a lot about chuuya lately (shocking for me i know (said with no sarcasm truly lmao it is rare for me))#cause of the 15 manga and also playing the fucking jeht quest in genshin impact ugh (where's the one dual genshin bsd fan who Understands)#but like this pressure has been building up for chuuya for so long due to being used and manipulated by all these people#first the sheep then mori then verlaine then still mori now#he was groomed since childhood just like dazai#but unlike dazai he didn't have an oda to help him get out of the mafia........ he's still stuck there#and his personality is different from dazai's. dazai was more self-aware imo (but still a groomed emotionally abused kid don't get me wrong#but chuuya's whole thing is needing to belong and wanting a leader to be loyal to but ending up in positions of leadership himself#which makes him feel pressured but he accepts and stifles any negative feelings just because he wants to belong#and all this crushed him with the events in the light novels and yeah he went through character growth but he's...... Still In The Mafia...#and that fucking scene asagiri added to the cannibalism stage play i don't think hardly anyone even knows about bc IT'S NOT DISCUSSED ANYMO#where mori emotionally manipulates him with the flags!!! and it deeply hurts him!!! and he presumably deals with that shit all the time!!!#it is WORRISOME. it WORRIES ME okay.#chuuya doesn't have anyone who can save him from the mafia (dazai is in no position to okay; it's all he can do just to try to save himself#and it's so so scary. it spells awful things for him.#didn't asagiri say he'd have a rough path or something??? and he added that fucking scene in the play!!! it haunts me!!#i fully expected this shit to hit a turning point in the meursault arc but we can't have nice things i guess#and as for kunikida a;lskdfl (took me this long to get to him oop) literally the ending of Entrance Exam (the novel) is just#One Big Foreshadowing for Kunikida's downfall#he's compared to the azure king for a reason. Sasaki saw the azure king in him for a reason. it's fucking worrying!!!!!#there hasn't really been anything like that since in the manga (just like for chuuya lol ugh) but he's TERRIBLE at coping with his trauma#and it only gets more apparent once shit hit the fan in the doa/hunting dogs/meursault arc#it's not good!!! i'm worried for kunikida too!!!!#even if the manga isn't focusing on this these worries are always in the back of my mind man#both kunikida and chuuya are doomed to hit some kind of breaking point eventually and i await those moments with dread yet anticipation#i want dazai to be able to save kunikida from the despair being too good a person brings the way he couldn't save oda#and chuuya.... if we get a scene with him & mori mirroring the one in dark era where dazai finds out that mori orchestrated the kids' death#oh man i think i'll fucking die (give it to me i need to cry)
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amelikos · 1 month ago
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Thinking about the portrayal of ancestry in Horizons.
#something about depicting adult characters as full people with their own motivations and lives as opposed to just making them flat#or not going deeper than a dichotomy between bad and good. it's refreshing to see stuff that feels real and poignant#i've been rotating rystal gibeon crave quite a lot in my mind lately. love the implications here and there about rystal and leyla#not telling you everything but leaving enough implications to imagine stuff.. i can think of a whole life for rystal and it's neat.#also i like that.. every family member feels like their own person. that thing about everyone having their own life and feelings.#liko is different from lucca and diana. but there are still moments which feel affectionate where you can think she takes after them#refreshing take on ancestry tbh. it strikes delicate balance between knowing your roots and past and finding yourself#learning about past tragedies to give them proper closure because you can't do that if you don't know what happened#even with gibeon.. very pleased and impressed that they are putting care in his character's depiction#specifically showing him as a young man and giving depth and perspective to him. allowing him to be a full character.#instead of just saying he is terrible and ending it at that. he gets to be someone with dreams and motivations and relationships#we've seen little of crave but the implications are there to pick apart and they are interesting#it genuinely enriches amethio's character and his side of the story. to make his relatives distinct people with their own perspectives#like.. instead of just saying his relatives are the worst evil!! they are putting care in the depiction and make them nuanced#characters who feel real.. strained and messy relationships with room for growth and development#definitely gives me more appreciation for the narrative in general. it's a kind of story that i find appealing#actually pleased that ame's side of the story is like that.. it could have been flat but thankfully it isn't.#stories with multiple layers and perspectives to them. my beloved.#anyway the portrayal of ancestry and adult characters in horizons is neat. and interesting.#the way they are tackling that kind of narrative to add to characters like liko and amethio. it's cool#hopefully. we get more on gibeon soon. he specifically has me intrigued.. him and crave too.#the writers definitely have specific themes they like and it shows through the story.. it's neat.#character notes
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goldenpinof · 7 months ago
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#long talk in tags incoming i guess#i don't understand why people keep following me when everything i do is complaining lately#and not about dnp per se. but about how the work is done and how their team *coughs* martyn *coughs* is handling stuff#i'm just looking at all this mess and i can't agree with basically anything#everything goes against my beliefs when it comes to work organisation. customer focus and etc.#and i'm trying SO hard to mildly help for free. and i'm just getting ignored. but that's like.. basic fixing and shit#any decent company would do it and say thank you for noticing and letting us know#but not irl merch lmao#and it all feels and looks like a massive joke#and i'm so so tired to basically pay for existence of this mess#i'm rethinking a lot of tour related decisions i made. and i know the reason i made them was about travelling more than the show itself#so i don't completely regret it#i'm just so tired of being spat in the face (figuratively speaking) over and over again#and tired of no one taking their job seriously ffs#neither martyn nor dnp nor their fucking editors#and i'm doing all that not for attention or whatever. but because I really care for the words to be correct and for the fucking text..#.. to be in the middle. like idc about the credit or WHO i need to ask for it to be fixed. i just want it to be fixed#so it looks good and how it should look#like. it's not that hard to put a little care into the things you do and getting paid for#I don't understand how it became so normalized. how being a bad manager is okay if you work with a fanbase and you're a 'small company'#a small company who has more than enough money to hire people to check things btw. if only anyone cared#i'm just so so tired of caring. because apparently it's not something everyone else does.#and i can let it slide when it comes to dnp. they are not being literally hired to do it. but others..... yeah#today was a moment when i thought 'that's a perfect opportunity to leave. enough.'#but the tour is in 1.5 months and i have tickets so i can't leave lmao#what kind of joke that is? oh and i know i'm fully responsible for this mild breakdown#personal
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tanicus-caesareth · 9 months ago
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guarana drama, damage control
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millionsknives · 1 year ago
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genuinely these panels are going to make me ugly cry
#i'm not back for real yet i think i want to stay away longer. i'm just here to put more things in the queue and answer messages#i really enjoyed trimax vol 4 idk something about it was less miserable than 1-3#might have been the first volume that i wasn't grimacing the entire time i read it. or maybe i'm just desensitized now.#unironically this prayer is soooo beautiful to me. give us this day our daily bread. not bread for the week not bread for a year#just enough for today.#lately when i've been praying it just looks like#please for the love of god please please please please please PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPL#things are not looking good for the community house.. lots bureaucracy with the city. and the church that funded us is falling apart#i don't know what i'm going to do if we get shut down it's the one thing in my life that's worth anything#all those kids... where are they going to go. who is going to help them. where is the neighborhood going to get their food.#in two days it will be the anniversary of [REDACTED] and i am so so so scared#just sat in my room today and fruitlessly scrolled thru jobs im not qualified for & tried not to think about thinking about killing myself#i don't WANT to kill myself i don't want to think about it i hate thinking about killing myself i will never ever kill myself or even try#but there is a demon or perhaps a ghost or evil wizard that tells me there's an easy way everything can go away. and it's A STUPID. BITCH.#please do not reply to this post i know you all mean well but i just don't think i can handle it.#talking about it i mean. and hearing people say nice but empty things.#i just wish i had someone to sit next to me.#personal#i don't want to go to church tomorrow :( it all feels so fake and i do not ever feel fed.
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spicyicymeloncat · 8 months ago
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I saw in your notes that you had to cancel your birthday so happy (possibly late) birthday!!
Haha thanks it was last year in September lol!!
And actually I did get to do birthday plans it was just kinda miserably bc the reason I was going to cancel was due to conflicts with my mum (and her making me feel like an awful person about it), but my other mum didn’t care and we went anyways and it was actually fine (the concerns my mum didn’t happen)
Also I was going through basically a platonic break up as well so crazy month lol
But thank you, and everyone who sent me flags, it was nice to get some positive interaction during all that!
#i think I said I cancelled out of mental health reasons#yeah my mental health issue is my parents#they technically did give me mental health issues I definitely was depressed last year before this incident#full context is I have a brother who was 3 and my mum thought he would have a tantrum at the restaurant bc it would be late#and she told me in a way that made me feel like a horrible person for even suggesting going out and never considering other people#the whole summer beforehand was about similar conflicts#but we went anyways and my brother probably enjoyed himself more than I did lol#i just checked all my discord msgs bc I talk to my friends about my parents a lot (it’s good to have a paper trail so I can know exactly wh#and how I’m traumatised by my parents lol)#and apparently after days of me asking my mum if we’re sure we can go and she’s happy to go out and to let me know if it won’t work#she made a backhanded comment the day before we were going to go out#where basically my brother was asleep and she said in a moody tone that this is what it would be like if we went out#and I was just devastated bc I gave her plenty of ways out and at that point I actually had my hopes up about it#and she didn’t say we can’t go she just shat on the idea so backhandedly#oh wow it was such a headache#we cancelled and we’re gonna do it Monday#and then last second we went out that day anyways#yknow when I wasn’t prepared and didn’t get enough sleep#my god#worst birthday actually#at least my sister was there she was cool#anyways sorry for vent ig??#anon#ask#personal
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freakwiththeknifecollection · 8 months ago
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Depression is literally so embarrassing because it forces you to have confrontations like "so you know that thing that's normally no problem at all for me? Well it's genuinely upsetting me" and then have to have a whole Discussion where you have to be like "no I know it usually doesn't bother me and is very normal but I'm ✨️fragile✨️ right now because of the horrors and situations" and feel uncomfy and vulnerable and stupid about it
#and then have to deal with them treating you gentler which feels uncomfy because of the horrors even though it's what you wanted#in conclusion: bad!#it's worth it being vulnerable etc etc etc but it feels so embarrassing every time#em rambles#personal#depression#I've just been really isolated lately in addition to situations and it's making me more sensitive to social stuff you know? ugh#like how do I say hey when I'm depressed it means a lot to me when you like validate what little I am doing and like#engage and ask follow up questions when I talk about my interests instead of changing the subject or making it about your own interest#because it makes me feel like what I care about doesn't matter to anyone#which is hard to say as a severally adhd girlie because who am I to say please don't change the subject but I'm sorry I'm struggling ok!!#things Are going OK socially I saw my friends for the first time in awhile yesterday and today and I'm having a 1 on 1 hangout with a#friend who's moving a couple hours away soon this Tuesday so!! very good things!! I'm just struggling day to day feeling like I'm invisible#a lot of the time until someone wants something from me 😕#or is getting something from me like ME listening to THEM but when I wanna talk about something its like 'uhhuh that's cool. *changes#subject*' you know?#I know work school and social lives is what most people talk about and other stuff (fictional media etc.) isn't as important to people#but when you're an unemployed not in school disabled girlie that's literally all I have most of the time. and I wish people were more#understanding of that you know?#please just indulge me. gosh
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honeymaki · 2 years ago
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Update 1 : am now an overwatch girlie sorry for the absence it’s a new fixation I’m a slay support
Update 2 : can feel another personality crisis on the rise so stay tuned
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