#I kid but only just
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inga-don-studio · 9 months ago
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I learned tonight that some of my coworkers DON’T pretend to be ghostbusters when using the backpack vacuum and I’ve never been more disappointed in my peers. Like look at this (stock image) and tell me what self respecting adult wouldn’t have the dang theme song playing in their head on loop ]:<
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payasita · 2 years ago
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being a manager sucks balls half the time but the cashier kids im in charge of trust me enough to dick around in front of me so ive been keeping a running list of the shit they say that makes me laugh randomly: -"guys, is it cheating if you play fortnite with your ex" [4 seperate others, immediately]: "YES" -"there must be like… infinite sentences" -"bro what bro what the fuck bro what's that mean bro why'd you say that bro what" <distraught response to a girl randomly greeting him with 'hey there big boy' in an old timey transatlantic news reporter accent
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noodles-and-tea · 3 months ago
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Little Stan getting manipulated by Bill has excellent angst potential but consider.
Stanley just, keeps tricking Bill. Because Bill would definitely massively underestimate Stanley and how far he’ll go to protect Ford (like in the actual show). We also know Stanley has the street smarts between the twins and could absolutely tell Bill is full of it.
And because Bill would absolutely loose his mind if he kept getting foiled by a snot nosed eight year old that isn’t even supposed to be here
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I like to think that he doesn’t even try that hard he just does not even care about bill
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akanemnon · 3 months ago
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Yeah, Kris is definitely NOT alright.
FIRST - PREVIOUS - NEXT
MASTERPOST (for the full series / FAQ / reference sheets)
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chloesimaginationthings · 4 months ago
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Into the pit is FNAF’s own Coraline story..
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frownyalfred · 3 months ago
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thinking about a Damian who was raised his entire life hearing how much he looks like his Father, how he's the blood son, how he's better than any other child Bruce Wayne has taken in, starting to buy into it like a kid does, only to hit puberty and turn out looking like 80% Talia.
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faeriekit · 27 days ago
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War of Succession: dp x dc
"It's simple, really," the Ghost King smirked, the purple bands around his eyes widening as he narrowed his gaze. "You release me from this circle. I give you a promise to never return, and you get an influential hostage from my side. Easy breezy. Can't get any simpler than that."
Diana, Clark, and Bruce shared a look.
On the one hand, a hostage would be a good way to ensure that the threat to stay away from their dimension would actually stick. This particular Ghost King had been known for sweeping through the whole length and breadth of at least one dimension, and leaving only charred wreckage behind. A fight against him would waste precious time and resources that they should be using to solve the problems of the dimension they were already in—
—And based on Constantine's projections, a fight with this monarch would be a fight they might not even win.
Wonder Woman grimaced. Batman and Superman carefully did not do the same.
Wonder Woman was the only combatant who willingly and purposefully executed the occasional opponent; she was the only one the Ghost King seemed to respect in some manner, even if he occasionally pointed wary red eyes at the Bat behind her. Still, Diana faced him head on, eye to eye.
"No harm will come to your hostage, assuming that they do not challenge us. Leaving our custody would become a declaration of hostilities between us. Do you agree to this contract?"
The Ghost King's fanged smile was bloodthirsty. His smugness was palpable.
"Deal. I swear it on my crown."
There was absolutely something up his sleeve. It was too bad that there was no time for Bruce to decipher his motives.
Diana held her bare hand out, expression grim, back straight. The Ghost King leaned down— his green-tinged face was blank as stone, his black-gloved hand broad and wide.
Wonder Woman was unafraid. She took the hand.
One of the presiding JL Dark members hissed; Diana was fairly sure it was Captain Marvel, given his age—
Green swept through Diana like high tide, like a riptide, like waves buffeting her left and right until water was forced into her lungs and tried to sweep her off her feet.
She held fast. Diana was the child of gods and a Leader of her people. Of course she held fast.
...The waters slowly ebbed. Diana blinked green out of her eyes and saw the Ghost King did the same, wincing and cracking his shoulders the way Batman might after a hard battle.
Zatanna, Captain Marvel, and Constantine eased back on the circle beneath the monarch.
—And then the Ghost King was gone.
No light. No smoke. No sound. Just gone.
"...Uh," said Clark. Bruce swiftly shushed him.
A lime green tear ripped its way open where the circle had been drawn only seconds ago. Diana thought she heard some sort of voice shouting, and then a deeper, thicker voice growl back—
—And a teenager was punted straight into the arms of a baffled Captain Marvel. Billy quickly swerved to catch him safely, just as shocked as the teen in his arms was.
The teenager had the same white hair as the Ghost King, a similar Black jumpsuit that bore the same emblem, the same sharp fangs in his gritted teeth...and a smaller, but identically designed, floating black-iron crown. Was he smaller in frame? Absolutely. Was he also clearly terrified at the realization that he was surrounded by foreign combatants?
His eyes were so wide. So green. So scared.
His form flickered as he tried to disappear from sight. Zatanna's preventative spellwork stopped the invisibility from taking hold— and his panic clearly increased as he tried to scrabble up and over Billy's shoulders.
The Ghost King had thrown them his heir. Diana swallowed. Worse, she feared, there was reason to suspect that doing so was more to his benefit than their own.
A battle for succession was rarely bloodless.
Diana did not look forward to this...aftermath.
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spoopdeedoop · 6 months ago
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king and harbinger, old and young
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bet-on-me-13 · 4 months ago
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Danny commits to the Bit a bit too hard...
So! For the first few weeks after his accident, whenever Danny would try to help the people of Amity Park, he would be treated as a Villain.
No matter if he had just defeated the Big Bad of the Week or saved a Cat from a tree, everybody in town only saw him as a Monster or Villain to he feared and hunted down. Danny was really getting sick of trying to get them on his side, until Sam made a suggestion.
"Why not just...play into it?" She said, barely looking up from painting her nails.
It was just an offhand suggestion, but it stuck with Danny. Why shouldn't he lean into it? The people of Amity Park already saw Ghosts as Evil, and they already assumed he was in cahoots with the Ghosts attacking the town. Why shouldn't he just...play into it?
So he does just that.
From that day on, whenever Phantom was spotted he would dramatically monologue about his Evil Plans, or claim that another Rogues attack on the City was his own act of terror.
Box Ghost destroys the towns Warehouses? It was on his orders.
Ember mind controls masses of Teenagers? All part of his Plans somehow.
Every Adult in Town is kidnapped by Young Blood? Danny gave them over to a friend as a Gift.
He crafts an identity for himself as the most Vile and Horrible Ghost that has ever attacked the City, using his own infamy to cement his legend even more firmly. The town only sees a Monsterous Villain, who has eveded capture near effortlessly for months on end, who constantly attacks their City and gets away with it.
Of course he still needs an excuse for how his plans keep getting stopped, and he gets it when his girlfriend Valerie becomes the Red Huntress. Before that, he just claimed infighting or the Fentons getting lucky, but Valerie becoming the Town's Hero meant he had a plausible excuse for how he kept getting "Foiled".
Val was suspicious, because she was not as involved as Phantom painted her to be, but in the end she had no proof of him faking his defeats. And she couldn't come up with any explanations for why he would do that in the first place. I mean, who would fake being a Supervillain? It had to he something else.
This did come back to bite him a while later, when the Justice League decided that enough was enough, and dispatched Justice League Dark to recruit Red Huntress and help Deal with him.
Coincidentally, that was the same day Pariah Dark attacked the Mortal Realm and sucked Amity Park into the Ghost Zone.
And honestly? Danny had spent over a Year proclaiming himself as a Villain who commanded Ghosts to attack the Human Realm, and he had heard about the Right of Conquest being Absolute in the Ghost Zone, so why not make it official? Why not overthrow the Ghost King, become the Ghost King, and cement his identity as a Villain while also forbidding Ghosts from entering the Human Realm without his permission?
He may have gotten a bit carried away and forgotten that the Villain thing was a disguise...but hey! He was still preventing Ghost Attacks! ...mostly. That's got to count for something right?
He may have let the Bit run a bit too far...
...
Check the tags for more context!
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nenoname · 1 month ago
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Cute wholesome fics where Stan teaches Soos or Wendy how to drive were always so funny to me because...
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And while he insists that everyone in town has ran over McGucket before, we also know he ran over Toby too and absolutely did not give a shit (understandable in that case)
But then again...
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Also bless Mr Honeypants
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And another detail I love is that his car is casually filled with parking tickets
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How many tickets are in Ford's name...
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somerandomcockroach · 20 days ago
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sp0o0kylights · 3 months ago
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“Dustin isn’t coming.”
“What?” Eddie says, all frantic and jovial movements freezing instantly.
His eyes narrow on Lucas--the bearer of bad news. “Why?” 
“Family emergency.” 
Mike makes a face. “I saw his mom yesterday and she was fine, so is this a…?” 
He makes a gesture that is entirely incomprehensible to anyone who isn’t Sinclair and his terrifying girlfriend.
(At least, Eddie thinks Max is Lucas’s girlfriend this week. It got a little hard to keep up after the third break-up-make-up marathon, and he frankly, stopped bothering to try.
It helped that she barely spoke--The only time notable being when Eddie had mockingly asked Sinclair if he needed a cheerleader when she’d first sat in, upon which she’d asked Eddie if he needed new kneecaps with a look in her eye that said she was serious.)
Wheeler Jr.’s gesture however, made her put her book down.
“You think he’s having migraines again?” She not so much asked as demanded, which had Mike shrugging. 
“Dunno." Lucas says. "Dustin didn’t say.” 
“Gotta be, if he called Dustin.” Mike mutters, Lucas shuffling his papers about as he begins to set up for Hellfire. He was the last in the room, practically late, which Eddie had planned on harassing him for had he not announced Henderson’s absence. 
(Fucking freshmen. They just weren’t terrified of Eddie like they used to be.) 
 “Robin must be sick or something, otherwise he’d call her.”  Lucas finishes as he finally sits down. 
“Didn’t the Marching Band go on some trip?” Mike turns to address the rest of the table, and gets nods from Jeff and Gareth both. 
“Yeah they’re marching in some parade in Indianapolis.” Jeff confirms. 
“So his last resort was Dustin?” Max is getting that tone in her voice, the one that makes everyone at Hellfire very uncomfortable. “Typical.” 
She pushes away from the table, making a show of gathering up her things before rising easily to her feet.
Eddie trades looks with the elder Hellfire members as she makes her exit--the kind that says they’re all going to be talking about this later. 
They knew their freshmen had some weird obsession with the former King, of course, but Mayfield too?
What the hell was up with that guy?
At least Eddie thinks, right before things are once again shot to shit, they can go back to playing the game.
He can make it work this early into things, and if Henderson isn't’ a fan of what he’s about to do to the kid’s character in his absence, well. 
Maybe he shouldn’t be fucking absent then. 
“So what, Max, you're gonna go over there and make it worse?” Mike snorts. 
Fatal mistake.
Eddie almost strangles him for it, if only because it prolongs this entire unnecessary conversation. 
Max performs a military perfect heel turn, coming straight back for Wheeler Jr., which makes him right about fall out of his seat in panic. 
“What was that, Wheeler?” 
“I’m just saying--!” 
“We don’t know Steve’s having migraines.” Lucas reiterates, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Maybe it’s something else.” 
“Does Steve get migraines a lot?” Grant asks, because despite all appearances he’s a terrible gossip and gets sucked in far too easily.
Eddie throws a pencil at him for it. 
“Hel-looo, we have a game!?” He thunders, but unfortunately for him, precious Stevie-Weavies headache now has everyone’s attention. 
“Yeah, though he’s really good at pretending he doesn’t.” Lucas answers with a put upon sigh. 
“There’s a whole pattern--he ignores it until it gets super bad, then he has to call Robin or Dustin to come get him when he inevitably gets stranded at work or the like, grocery store.” 
“Well who else do you think he’d call?” Mike scoffs again. He does a lot of that, when discussing Harrington. “It’s not like his parents are--Ow, Max!” 
“Close your mouth before I close it for you.” She hisses and Mike, shockingly, does just that. 
To Eddie, she says; 
“Your ass isn’t any better, or did you forget I live across from you?” 
Eddie--who had an insult primed and ready--promptly shuts his mouth.
(Fucking! Asshole! Freshmen!) 
“Maybe I should go too.” Lucas says, hedging a look between his girlfriend and his DM. 
“No.” She snaps, pointing a finger at him.
 “If you go, then this idiot,” she flicks her finger to  Mike, “will go and then we really will make it worse. Stay here before your bichon frise has a fit about all his sheep abandoning him.”
Then she’s turning on her heel again, storming out. 
“What the hell’s a bichon frisé?” Gareth asks in the aftermath, frowning. 
“It’s a type of ahhhh--” Jeff clearly thinks better of the explanation, eyes sliding to Eddie.
Who’s scowling.
“I know what a bichon frisé is, Jeff.” He snaps. 
“I don’t.” Grant loudly complains. 
Jeff attempts to both calm Eddie and explain while Mike and Lucas spend far too many minutes looking after Max. 
“Enough!” Eddie howls, temper finally getting the best of him. “Are we playing or do you also need to go sit by the King’s bedside?”  
“Thank you,” Mike says, like he wasn’t a third of the entire problem. “Let’s play!”
They make it about ten entire minutes before getting knocked off track again. 
In fairness, not that Eddie would ever admit it--the second meltdown is his own fault.
xXx
Hellfire is Eddie’s domain. 
It’s one of the few places where he could relax without getting harassed or hounded, and having his freshmen--his!--abandon him for King Fucking Steve had set him off. 
So he’d made a few comments about it.
Maybe introduced an NPC who sounded suspiciously similar to Harrington, only to instantly kill him off. 
Made another couple of nasty comments. 
Who cares? It worked him through his snit rather nicely, and his boys all knew to leave him be.
Except, apparently, for Lucas. 
“Dude, would you lay off?”  The kid finally snaps, pencil slamming down on the table. 
Which is the most backbone-like thing anyone has ever heard Sinclair say, and he gets far more whistles for it than he should.
Eddie pins him in place with a glare. 
“What was that Sinclair?” He snarls, voice as menacing as he can make it.
(It’s pretty terrifying, he’s practiced quite a bit with it.) 
Sinclair flinches, but doesn’t back down. 
“I said lay off. Steve has migraines because of--” He stops, before seeming to come to a decision. “Because of me. He took a hit for me, and I owe him a life debt for it.” 
To Eddie, he says; “You get what those are, right?” 
Mike rolls his eyes. “It wasn’t just for you--”
“That time with Billy was!” Lucas is quick to snarl. “But you know what Mike, you’re right. It wasn’t just for me. He T-boned a car for all of us!” 
Sinclaire is on his feet now, which is the unfortunate moment that Eddie realizes he has once again lost control of the room. 
A situation he firmly blames on Steve Harrington, because he’s petty. 
“Or did you forget that part? That’s you, me, Will, Nancy and Jonathan right there! Nevermind the tunnel. Or the junkyard! 
“We had the junkyard handled--”
Lucas scoffs. 
“We absolutely did not.” 
“I don’t get why you’re all making such a big deal out of this. He’s the fighter. That’s what he does. That’s why we brought him to the tunnel.”
“You recall what happened at Starcourt, right?” Lucas challenges, furious. “You did see him after, right?” 
This, finally, seems to shut Mike up. 
“Shouldn’t you be mad at him for that?” He says after a moment, and the rest of Hellfire has completely put aside all actual gaming to watch this play out with a morbid sort of fascination. 
Eddie allows it, only because he’s trying to breathe the way Wayne taught him to before he loses it entirely and throws both of the idiot kids out of the drama room. 
“He pulled your sister into it.”
“Have you met Erica!? You can’t pull her into shit!” Lucas spits furiously. “That wasn’t D&D, Mike. It was the Upsi--real life.” 
Lucas is quick to correct himself, even in the heat of the moment--as all the kids are, like the entire school hasn’t clocked that they have some weird ass secret they’re terrible at hiding.
“And if we’re playing those games, then who pulled him into the tunnels? Who made him come to the junkyard?”
“Dustin.” Mike says snidely. 
“You don’t get to blame Dustin when Steve was the only person around.” 
“There were people around! They just weren’t people who--weren’t--who couldn’t--”
“Finish that sentence.” Lucas demands 
“Be trusted.” Mike spits out, like it hurts him. 
“Exactly.” 
“El went through way more than Steve ever has! El--”
“El was using her po--doing mage things! And also, she shouldn’t have had to go through all this shit either! We can’t rely on her to save the day every single time, Mike--and look at how hurt she gets!”
“She--”
“She hides it from you, you know. How bad she hurts. Cause she wants to put your feelings first.” 
“I--”
“Will does too.”  Is Lucas’s parting shot. His backpack is in his hands in a blink, papers and character figure shoved wildly into it, before he’s storming out the door in a poor mimicry of Mayfield.
“Harrington T-Boned a car?” Grant says, in the resounding silence. 
“That BMW of his hasn’t had a scratch on it--” Jeff says, with an inquisitive tilt to his head. 
“He didn’t use the Beamer.” Mike interrupts, angry and sulking. “Are we playing or not?”
“I’m gonna say not, given we are down two players.’ Eddie tells him through clenched teeth. 
“I’m going to be so mad if Steve doesn’t have a migraine.” Mike grumbles, as he begins packing up his stuff. 
The rest of Hellfire follow his lead, after one look at Eddie’s face convince the lot of them that it’s best to flee now, before Eddie unleashes all his pent up rage. 
“Not as mad as I’ll be, Wheeler.” Eddie promises darkly.
And it is a promise--because now, he’s going to follow all his stupid (sans Mike, who isn’t in his good graces either but at least stayed) freshmen--and go visit one fallen King.
If Harrington doesn’t have a headache now, he will when Eddie’s done with him.
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newttxt · 10 months ago
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vague and sketchy captain trio shenanigans,, idk pretend theyre seastone bullets or something
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ratbastarddotfuck · 1 month ago
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if you're a white person taking pleasure in the idea that Trump voters of colour are experiencing racist violence from white trumpers because "they got what's coming to them" I don't think you're anti-racist at all, I think you were just waiting for an acceptable target, and you're also fucking weird.
Bad Person Deserves Punishment For Their Sins give me a fucking break and get yourself out of the fucking catholic church. you're all prison abolitionists until you see someone you don't like.
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xxplastic-cubexx · 2 months ago
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[right to left]
finally finished This Wip from Ever ago and so now i ask you ever look into another dudes eyes and suddenly want to do whatever he wants
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chloesimaginationthings · 5 months ago
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The real reason Michael has a British accent in FNAF…
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