#I just needed to find a way to enable it
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Dashboard Unfucker v6.1.0
Hello, I have upgraded the script into a state I can call fully functional again!
Depending on your extension settings, you might get a notification for the update automatically, otherwise either go into the dashboard and click on the update button, or reinstall the script from Github
The OTD UserStyle is not longer a dependency, please disable it as it WILL cause broken formatting
Some features are also gone semi-permanently, just because they cannot be made functional in a simple manner again due to changes to Tumblr's internals. If I get enough requests, I'll consider adding them back, but it will take a bit of time
Enjoy!
#clangpan.txt#dashboard unfucker#and for those that wonder. no I did not take code from the UserStyle. Tumblr has a flag to revert to the old layout#I just needed to find a way to enable it#dev
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Mini rant below and in the tags, the only time I’ll talk about this and my personal take on it.
The way people talk about hypothetical male Anya on Twitter and the idea of how Mouthwashing would play out if the genders were swapped makes me remember how people still don’t take sexual assault and rape with male victims with the same gravity, especially when the perpetrator is female.
#not even gonna tag this cause I don’t want to start discourse in the tags but you can absolutely still explore the concepts of patriarchy#toxic masculinity misogyny and rape culture if the genders where swapped#like those concepts don’t disappear just because Anya is a boy now cause you have to think of all the ways it applies to male victims and#I just don’t understand why people keep getting angry when people facilitate different discussion the game opens you up to#like yes I get the frustration with not seeing the conversations you want but start them go find them why complain on other posts when#people are bringing attention to similar issues and the ways they are overlooked dismissed or blame the victim#I for one think we should have more basic clarifying conversations of SA rape cultures and how toxic masculinity and sexism create scenarios#like the Tulpar and enable men like Jimmy but I also can understand and enjoy the topic being expanded upon to include other cases on a#flipped scale like yes how male centered the fandom is is annoying considering the topic but seeing comments saying that SA isn’t as harmful#to men cause they can’t get pregnant is a whole can of worms you really need to unpack cause holy shit#like in this scenario if Jimmy is pregnant and can’t get rid of the baby Anya is the father yes Jimmy is pregnant but that’s because in this#swap she assaulted a man lied to either say it was consensual he forced himself on her or like canon panicked and semi admitted to forcing#him either way he is afraid to do anything because men do get blamed for defending themselves against women in these situations not to#mention the shaming that occurs because he is a man and should step up for the kids sake and likely be told he should be proud a girl wanted#him that much like yes you have to explain it more but bodily autonomy in this scenario is just as nuanced and I can’t believe I have to#defend something being male centered in a game where the rape of a woman is the catalyst just because people are saying SA for men#is not as damaging or degrading or harmful to autonomy as it is to a woman like how can you want conversations on rape culture and shut down#people bringing up other nuances in the conversation#like people are gonna jump around with it I know but if you only want to talk about one thing stay in that sphere like I just don’t get#going to another space especially one that isn’t even being weird or toxic and starting shit cause you don’t like it like the amount of#unnecessary and mean comments on normal art of think pieces I’ve seen on Twitter is crazy like it’s stupid callout shit for the sake of just#not liking something like I’m seeing so much screen shotting and vague posting like just at the bitch and fight about it like it’s still a#relatively small fandom ur just asking for in fighting on like the few things we shouldn’t have to worry about#as a victim my self and who has been in other situations and being afab I just can’t understand the vitriol toward this sort of discussion#mouthwashing#actually I will tag this cause you can explore the themes in mouthwashing still stop being freaks and just block bitches ong
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hhau rescue rambles - part I
>> hhau masterpost here << [cw besides the usual mess and violence: animal death mention]
It’s been months since the latest hermit got saved, and over a year since Hermitcraft imploded. There’s only two people to go: Scar and Grian. And they can’t seem to locate them at all. But they can’t stop looking. They can’t, they won’t.
The rescue party is comprised of X (voidwalker), Doc (creeper), Ren (wolf), Impulse (partially demon), Cub (vex), Gem (deer), and Pearl (moth). Thanks to X knowing how to navigate and survive the void, they are able to get a void vessel (a sort of ship) to base in as they go around scanning different worlds and scouring for information.
Until they come across a world that reads as permadeath, and somewhere in the world files, X flags Grian’s and Scar’s name. Not as players; there’s no list available here. What comes up is the wanted poster. It doesn’t have a date stamp. It could be months old, and they know Scar's track record with dying.
Still, they have to try.
They search for a place that seems to have good resources and Cub, Gem, and Pearl get dropped down. They’re equipped with bracelets that they can activate to send X a signal to teleport them back, and two extra for Grian and Scar, if they do find them, but they have to gather any other kind of equipment, including armour and weapons, on their own.
They quickly realise comms don’t work on this world, and as the player list is also non-existent or corrupted, they are going in blind.
Well… almost.
They use Cub’s vex bond with Scar to pick a direction to head in.
--
Grian and Scar, in the meanwhile, are not having a Good Time.
Some awful things have happened prior to this, namely the ending of the Summer house arc. To quickly sum it up, Grian and Scar went up north, for as long as they could. Away, away, away from everyone. Until it felt like maybe they’re far away enough, and they tentatively set up a house. Which turned into a nest. Which turned into a semblance of permanence.
A lot of things went on here. Days turned into peaceful weeks and, tentatively, they started thinking that maybe they can start planning some kind of future here. They planted crops. Scar re-learned to glide with his torn wings. Grian unfurled his wings and re-learned the feeling of flying through the sky. And they found a bird friend! (A real, living bird in this world!)
The reality caught up to them eventually.
Nobody’s really seen Scar or Grian for a while, but the avians in this world have dull wing patters, for survival reasons, and so Grian is really special. And the hunters don’t want to give that up. The reward on the wanted poster gets upped, and now the fever pitch to get this avian rises. The hunters go further. In bigger groups. Greedy and determined.
They find the nest house, empty at the time, and they burn it down.
Scar and Grian come back to find it in flames, and to find themselves unsafe and hunted once again. All of a sudden, they have nothing again. The fire licks high, turning everything to ash, to a distant cheering and hollering of a party of hunters. There’s no sign of their bird friend.
(Grian finds him later. Dead, with wings cut off. The only creature that resembled him; the bird he befriended, the proof that a winged creature could exist here and survive. Ripped to pieces. Echoing the only fate that is bound to await Grian as well.) (It was a sun conure parrot, bright and beautiful.)
The hunters are on their tail once they realise that Scar and Grian are here; that it wasn’t just some temporary base that’s now abandoned. With no remorse and still too much cheer, bloodthirsty and unstoppable, they go after them.
Scar’s blood is absolutely boiling and he expects Grian to ground him. To talk him down. But Grian’s mind buzzes, looking at that bird, and— He’s as down to fight as Scar is. Because anger is easier than grief right now.
He’s so tired of grief.
So instead, Grian goes angry and feral. (The other option is to fall apart, and he can’t.)
They tear this particular hunting group apart, and it’s meant to make them feel better, but it doesn’t. It feels like a necessity; like just one more step towards survival. They loot what they can, and they continue moving, realising that stopping anywhere to do more than just survive is a moot point. They’re not going to outrun this. They'll never be allowed to stop. They’ll be hunted forever.
(Grian will be hunted forever—)
The word gets out, and more and more hunters arrive, wanting the trophy of violet wings and the wanted reward for themselves. It’s a sport to them. A way to get rich. Like a gold fever, they continue tracking Grian and Scar, relentlessly hounding them down.
There are times when things go worse in these encounters. Grian gets his wings grabbed and attacked, and it sends him spiraling back to never allowing anyone—including himself—to touch his feathers. (He was doing better and now it’s all gone.)
They internalise many horrible thoughts, during their run. It’s been a year-worth of culmination of awful events, a year worth of pain and fear and loss.
For Scar, as a vex, he’s been expected to be a monster from the start. And all he wanted here was some peace. To be with Grian. He wasn’t allowed it, but now he finally got a glimpse at it—at what could’ve been; at who he wanted to be from the beginning (who he’s always been)—and it’s violently taken from him. So yeah, fuck it. If they want a monster, he’ll be a monster.
(This leads him to thinking that he shouldn’t be trusted with soft things anymore, Grian’s feathers included, especially as Grian gets ground-bound again and starts pulling his wings tightly against his back and flinching at the mere implication of touch.) (It hurts to witness, after what Scar’s seen: Grian, freely gliding through the sky, violet feathers catching sunlight.) (He was allowed to preen them, tentatively, slowly, gradually, a couple of times.) (Not anymore. Not anymore.)
Grian keeps thinking about the bird, and how they’re the same. He’s seen the brutal display, the way the wings were taken. He can’t quite stop thinking about it.
But it’s more than that. He’s also thinking about [redacted]. About anything winged being doomed. About what happened with the vexes. It all spins and spins and spins until he can’t see himself as anything but harbinger of death.
The hunters wouldn’t care to go this far for one vex. They only go because of his goddamn feathers.
Naturally, this topples into him thinking that Scar will be safer and better off without him. They’ve been running on sleepless nights and exhaustion, trying to get away to no avail. They’re tired, and things are looking dire, and— Grian wants it to stop. He needs Scar to be taken out of this equation, separated from this fate. He needs him to be safe. (He can’t bring death to Scar.)
Grian can lead the hunters the other way. They only really care about him. ([redacted] already proved that point, after all.)
So one night, Grian sneaks away.
He presses a soft kiss to Scar before he goes. (It’s a farewell kiss.) Scar is asleep, only kind of waking up to it—just that groggy, sleepy “mm?” Grian kisses his forehead again, oh so gently, and murmurs the quietest “Love you. Stay safe for me.” To Scar, it just feels like a dream, and he dozes off again, none the wiser.
The next morning, Scar wakes up to Grian gone.
For a while, he doesn’t even remember that hazy interaction from the night, but then he does remember, all of a sudden. An absolute vertigo slams into him, panic flooding his veins as he stares down the empty, quiet forest.
And this is when the Hermit Rescue Party finds him.
They only find Scar.
They only find Scar, and they instantly try to take him off world.
-- part II here
#hhau#ange rambles#ange writes#scarian#mmm link enabled me to be extra evil#so i'm splitting this up#(also just an excuse for me to take a break tbh)#(but wanted to give something)#OK here's the thing#they find scar right?#but#you need to realise#scar's panicked and frenzied#and he's covered in (old) blood#and he's not Safe or Sane#<3#also they have no way to trace grian or to even know if he's alive at all#their priority is to grab scar and get him somewhere safe#which is#away from this world#(away from grian)#the redacted bit is for different rambles that come chronologically earlier#stuff we don't want to spoil :3#will i remember to come back to this and edit it once those rambles are out?#pfsh surely not
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oh my goodness
i think ill cry happy /gen
#wait shit i forgot to tag ramble here lemme just#so remember how i was practically upset and pained that the idv stageplay rentry page stopped working? yeah - today i suddenly just#started missing the stageplay again and wanted to find a way to get it and i recalled milo found that rentry link via tiktok so i went ther#theres a tiktok tutorial on how to enable subs and the poster said they had a discord server where all the links are saved so i immediately#jumped in the server. it turns out- this is the same person whose rentry page broke and the entire list of episodes are there ...#ready and waiting........#im . so#sorry sdkfjkfjsfjsjd im so excited u have no ide akaldadajd aaaaaaaaaaaa AAAAAAA IM SO GLAD I DECIDED TO CHECK#I DIDNT WANT TO BELIEVE I JUST CANT WATCH IT ANYMORE LIKE THERE HAS TO BE A WAY#IF MY GOOGLE DRIVE WAS ABLE TO GET ONE EP LINK THEN IT MEANS THE REST ARE STILL ACTIVE I JUST NEEDED TO FIND OP#AND OP HAS A WHOLEASS SERVER COMPILED OF IT IM SO!!! IM WANNA CRY /POS#IM GONNA WATCH ASAP. I NEED IT WHILE IM DRAWING#IM GONNA CRY IM SO HAPPY AAHH#THE WHOLE FUCKING MASTERLIST IS THERE
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look ok i cant admit this where a lot of people i know irl can see but ive noticed that sometimes when i brainrot a little too hard, i start behaving a little more like my blorbos and taking on some of their personality traits.
i dont know if this is kinning or what have you because a lot of the time i just like them or think they're funny, usually both. and i dont think its a deliberate, conscious decision either because otherwise i would not be worried about my family thinking that my personality has changed in the weeks that ive started obsessing over a new thing.
#auri rambles#is it subconscious mimicry? is it just another silly little side effect of the blorbo brainrot??#this is just a thing that happens and ohhhhh my god i need to keep the rise of the tmnt obsession on the down low in front of my family#THEYRE GONNA FIND OUT. THEY'RE GONNA#if i decided i was going to be like this i would've stopped by now because the potential embarassment isnt worth it!!! its really not!!!!#'hey your responses to questions are kind of sophisticated and almost bordering on smart-alecky lmao'#IM SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO COME OFF THAT WAY!!! i think its just that some aspects of my normal personality come out more#when enabled by blorbo brainrot. or something. fuck my gay life.
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collei & scaramouche/wanderer dynamic makes me so fucking insane esp in aus where theyre both human
#no bc they have the Range#they can be so fucking pessimistic and cynical and awful#they can do awful awful things and have awful things done to themselves and they could enable each other so easily#but they also both find a way to turn their lives around and someone who cares#and they work so so so fucking hard to change and become the person they wanna be#just. the thought of them enabling each other to do awful things the thought of them helping each other to change and grow#i need to chew on liquid glass#aly.genshin
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hGFFHJJ
jokes aside this has been on my mind so much lately. i‘ve been politically active before but i really think trying to push for a four day work week could be the next thing i get into. (obv there’s loads of other things to do but one has got to start somewhere right.) (especially because studies consistently show huge successes of 4 day work weeks??? like employee satisfaction, health, but also productivity of the company itself and obviously how easy of a time they have to attract talented workers and keep them around)
I don't know; I kind of think that our culture is based around systematic denial of human limitations. I mean, there's the eight-hour work day (which is about 4 hours longer than most people are consistently able to remain productive); buffing your qualifications on job applications (which everyone needs to do to some extent, because everyone else is doing it); the expectation of multitasking, even though it's not really possible; academics are running around with impostor syndrome, ultimately because there's only so many books that an individual is capable of reading, while a bunch of liars and grifters pretend that they're experts at *everything* and are held up as thought leaders. Billionaires are held up as if they're just incredibly hard workers, photoshopped movie stars held up as if they're just incredibly beautiful. We feel guilty for not being something that never has and can never exist.
#and then ofc don’t get me started on universal basic income#we had a vote on that a few years back that obviously wasn’t accepted but i rly think it got people talking#and then wage disparity and upping taxes on#capital versus wages etcetcETC!!!#editing to add;;;#i‘m also convinced a 4 day work week would enable people to make more environmentally sustainable choices#like who‘s got the time to browse second hand stores at leisure until you find exactly the furniture you need#the 4 day work week would also make care work more balanced#people would have time to volunteer more#or just relax more and be happier people#there’s literally no reason we should be working (in think related jobs) that long per week#and obviously there’s then the issue that manual labor cannot be reduced in the same manner - which would have to be evened out by#increasing pay for these jobs significantly#— the way we should have done so SO long ago bc how tf is manual labor less valuable thank thinky thought labor#it ISNT#actually it damages your body significantly and forcedully if anything the wages should be higher
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"Surely there was a better way to convey this information" probably! That may be why I'm no longer asked to contribute to our social media page at work!
But its that season again and i want to remind everyone that just because an object is vest-shaped and floats does not make it a lifejacket. Only a Coast Guard approved PFD is tested and rated to save your life. Here's an example of what I'm talking about:
This...thing pops up in searches for "child's inflatable lifejacket" and bills itself as such. But scroll down and we find an explanation:
In contrast to life vests meant to keep your head above water, our vest enables you to swim smoothly with your head in the water. It keeps you buoyant longer for a safe and enjoyable experience - without worry of surprise riptides or fatigue.
Catch that? This thing is not intended to and will not keep your head above water, the single most important thing a personal flotation device should do. What if you are in a riptide and fatigued while wearing this thing and not longer able to keep your breathing hole above the water's surface? You're shit out of luck. You drown.
Consumers may notice that there is a warning notice on the back, but the good people at Amazon have cleverly obscured it. We can still make out "does not protect [...] drowning". If your waterwings, floaties, or vest-shaped inflatable have a disclaimer like this then they are not rated to safe your life, your child's life, your dog's life, whatever!
By contrast, every Coast Guard approved PFD has labeling like this:
It will clearly say USGC approved and have an approval number. It will say WHO it is rated for (infant, child, youth, adult), the size (small, medium large), an upper weight limit, and generally what kind of recreation its approved for (near shore versus offshore etc). It will give you instructions for proper use and signs that your lifejacket is nearing the end of its utility and needs to be replaced.
Not all personal flotation devices are suited for all activities. Whitewater kayaking and deep-sea fishing need more specialized gear than a day at the lake. But you should have, at minimum, a correctly-sized, well-fitting, CG approved PFD in serviceable condition for any kind of activity on or near the water. Have it, but most importantly, wear it!!!!!
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https://www.tumblr.com/qqueenofhades/743255237060689920/the-thing-that-confuses-me-about-the-dont-vote
The “don’t vote” left’s point is basically that, if Biden gets a second term, it’ll basically signal that “They’ll vote for us as long as we’re not Republicans, why don’t we do some REAL fucked up shit, if we can get away with it?” It takes the power out of the people’s hands and places it firmly in the party’s.
I can’t completely disagree with that, my caveat is that there’s no real alternative system or party in place, because top-down change is ineffective; a third party president has to contend with a two party congress.
Except no. This whole "Biden just wants to do as much fucked up shit as possible while not being a Republican, and if you give him a second term he'll do more fucked up shit deliberately to spite you" mindset is only possible as an interpretation if you a) deliberately and comprehensively ignore everything he has done to date, and b) you approach the situation with the maximum bad faith possible. Not to mention, the ultimate outcome of this Big Important Teaching Biden A Lesson is that Trump gets back into power and makes everything orders of magnitude worse, because he does in fact want to deliberately do evil shit to everyone and says so at every opportunity. There is not some magical happy alternative that springs into existence by not voting. If you choose this as a year to Teach Biden A Lesson, you are enabling Trump. Trump will be much, much worse. If you don't care about that, I still do not care what your Great Ideology is. You are not helping anyone and you are directly and irreversibly hurting everyone.
I made a post a few days ago wherein I mentioned that I want to assess Biden fairly, taking into account both strengths and weaknesses, but the rampant bad-faith, lying, misreading, misrepresentation, and open sabotage of him (especially by the online left; the GOP sometimes only wishes they were as good at turning Biden's voter pool against him) makes it really difficult to do that. My frustration with those people makes me just want to go "BIDEN IS GREAT THE END." I know he is a flawed old man (though by literally every account of a career spent in public service, he really does care about making the world a better place and any remotely good faith reading of his accomplishments thus far can see that). It is also very likely that he goes MORE left in a second term because he won't have to face the electorate again, he has always gone more left when pushed before, and he's not actually the scheming genocidal mastermind that leftist social media paints him as. Shocking, I know.
I know there are things in the world we don't like and don't want and want to stop, and therefore we blame our own president for not making it stop. But I have zero, no, none, absolutely none whatsoever sympathy for this pseudo-populist "WE NEED TO TEACH BIDEN A LESSON BY ELECTING TRUMP AGAIN, I AM VERY MORAL MUCH ACTIVIST" mindset. There's this funny thing about America wherein it is still (for now) a democracy. If Biden wins a second term, he can't run again. I would take literally anything these people said more seriously if they focused on developing their dream progressive successor for 2028 (and also figured out how to get that person elected and in a place to make real change) rather than cynically sabotaging Biden in the most consequential election year, again, of our lifetimes. If you don't like him now, find a way to make his successor a better option. Throwing a toddler tantrum and handing the country back to a senile, deranged, fascist, revenge-riddled, theocratic Trump HELPS. NOBODY. I still don't know how many times I'm going to have to say that, but yeah.
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Another funny isekai idea is someone getting isekai’d but they have it set in their mind that they’re secretly a main character and they really do want to be, so they keep trying to do things to prove that they don’t have secret innate skills just in case the universe is just hiding the truth to them. Turns out they truly are ordinary in every single way, but in their desperate attempts to prove it, they become extraordinary.
#story ideas#i just imagine them being like#’what if i have secret innate powers/magic of a rare kind? i need to ensure that i don’t!#*’#and then they end up inventing this whole new revolutionary way to test innate ability#‘i know i look ordinary but what if i’m secretly actually hot once i dress up a bit!?’#then they revolutionize the fashion and makeup industry#turning wallflowers into the divine#‘what if the prophecy shows the chosen ones at the first years’ assembly!?’#and then they invent a never before seen tool that enables invisibility#and their love interest is like#‘you’re amazing’#and they’re like ‘no! i’m normal! there’s nothing extraordinary about me at all’#this would be one of those gag ones without any emotional depth haha#mc would be a revolutionary inventor and scholar of the arcane and divine#while mc insists on their ordinaryness i think deep down tho they are aware they are revolutionary#like i can see some sleezy salesman getting ahold of them and selling their inventions making bank?#and the love interest revealing the truth and getting the dude themselves#and mc like#‘why did you do that what if the nobles find me and make me some kind of important side character!?’#‘what if i get recruited to work for the archduke and then catch the eye of the king and—‘
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I NEED to make a char to pair up with wyll in another run but cant decide what direction to go w them....
#playing another Really Good Guy feels like the obvious choice but i dont want to enable wylls self sacrifical tendencies#i feel like they need to be either a little fucked up but still Good to provide some balance#or just Good with a strong sense of self preservation#or find a way to make a good foil to him thats still able to get his approval...#finns bg3 tag
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So uhh. If you feel like talking about it. As someone who lives in the US, how are you being kind to yourself on this upsetting morning <3
Checked in with my loved ones first and foremost.
It's interesting. The vibe I've been getting from my circle is very different from 2016. Much less… dread and horror at a realignment of the understanding of what can and can't happen here, now, in this place and day and age. More "fuck, guys. again? whatever. enjoy your consequences, maybe you'll manage to learn something this time."
Frustration and anger is not the most positive feeling, or even the most fair one to express, but it is a protective one. It hurts a lot less than most alternatives.
And it's quite a shift. It was earthshattering back then. How could this have been allowed to happen? Why couldn't it be stopped? Why couldn't we stop it? Why couldn't I stop it? Why couldn't everyone see what this meant? Why couldn't I make them understand? Did they really not care? What did that mean about humanity as a whole? Were we so thoughtless? How could anyone be trusted?
It seems… much less earthshattering to see it happen twice. Disappointing, sure. Frustrating. But nowhere near as devastating as the first time I saw it unfold. We already knew it could happen. I've already had time to digest the implications. Now I'm just freshly disappointed.
It also feels less indicative of Crushing Truths Of Reality this time. We've seen shit get bad. We've also seen shit get better from here! We know both outcomes are possible, even inevitable. We know hoping for a better future is always worthwhile. This isn't the apocalypse. It's an unremarkably bad turn of events brought on by unremarkably self-centered well-documented human impulses. It's utterly mundane in its unpleasantness. It doesn't need to be dignified with despair.
A democratic election, no matter the outcome or the side we're on, makes us all acutely aware of how outnumbered we are by people whose worldviews and priorities are demonstrably incomprehensible to us. And the first time you get outnumbered, it's a shock. Defeat is haunting. It didn't matter how badly you wanted it; by the very function of democracy, you do not have the power to override greater numbers. (insert electoral college caveat here)
The second time through, I find myself focusing on a different facet that has dramatically reduced the amount of spiralling I'm doing. I don't expect this to work for everyone, but for me specifically, it helped to crystallize a few thoughts:
You don't have the power to control anyone else. You don't. You can't share your worldview and your revelations with them. You can't make them think or understand anything. You can lay it all out for them, but you can't make them listen, and you can't make it click. A mentor can't make their student learn a lesson; that's why teaching is so complicated and hard. An active choice must be made by the person to enable themselves to understand, and they must put the pieces together in their own mind before it makes sense to them, and the pieces must have been presented in a way that makes sense to them in the first place. Lead a horse to water, can't make them drink.
These elections highlight a disconnect in what different groups of people care about; and no matter how clearly you explain yourself or how passionately you perform, caring cannot be forced on someone. Understanding and connection cannot be forced. You cannot make anything or anyone matter to someone. They have to choose to see how it matters in order to internalize it. If they choose not to, that is not your failing. You couldn't have made them do it by just Explaining Better. They are not your responsibility. They make their own choices. You can't reach inside their head and connect the dots for them.
I'm a storyteller. I make stories and put them out into the world. I hope people get something good out of them, but I have no control over what that something is. I want people to be thoughtful and kind and compassionate and hopeful and see themselves reflected in stranges, no matter their differences. I can craft stories that I hope encourage this. But that is the extent of my ability and the extent of my responsibility. I control no-one's actions but my own, and so while I am not having the best day, I am at least content that I am doing what I can, and I am not shattering myself against impossibilities trying to control the things I can't.
Sometimes, people make decisions that I think are really bad. I can't make that not happen. All I can do is try to make decisions that will result in things I think are good. Today, that means checking in on people, and not assigning too much dramatic narrative weight to an ultimately mundane set of unremarkable bad decisions outside of my control. We'll take life as it comes and help each other out when and how we can. Everything else is out of our hands.
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Pink Hood is also one sneaky son of a bitch and it baffles. Everyone.
Tim's out here in neon fucking colors, not seemingly trying to hide but it'll be a cold day in hell before he doesn't get the drop on someone.
He's essentially one of those asshole cop cars that hides under the bridge with a speed trap and you don't know they're there untill you're fucked.
No one is safe. (Except Cass)
Batman is a little unsettled at this clear show of talent, and frustrated that Tim refuses to use it as Red Robin.
Tim claims it's 'Revenge Fuelled' and 'Can Only Be Brought Out In Times Of Great Need'.
Jason calls bullshit, but won't be caught dead (again) admitting that to Bruce. It's a Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss world after all, and Jason's fucking THRIVING on Tim's Villan Era.
Steph's college dormmate: Okay, fuck marry kill, Batman, Nightwing, Red Hood
Stephanie: I'm killing all of them, thanks
Steph: Hey Bruce, no hard feelings, okay? But if I ever kill you just know that it’s because I really, really don’t want to marry you.
Bruce: *is trying to unpack that statement*
#i find this way too funny of a concept#someone needs to draw this#i would SCREAM#tim drake is a menace#jason is an enabler#also and asshole#just for kicks#dc fanfic#dc#batman#dc batman#batfam headcanons#batfam#batfamily#pink hood
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The JJK men’s fav cuddling postitions <3
incl: Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Choso, Sukuna, Toji, Megumi, Yuuji, Yuta
cont: fluff :3, suggestive on Toji’s
note: i think this is my first full fluff fic…lol
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ
Gojo:
I know Gojo absolutely loves every position he can get you both into where you are physically as close as possible. Gojo's infinity is on automatically most of the time, the only touch he receives being from his students occasionally or from you. So when the time comes around for Gojo to be cuddled up with you, he needs to make sure every part of his body is touching some part of you.
I can see him being a fan of face-to-face cuddling, your limbs intertwined with one another, either his or your face pressed into the other's chest, your soft breathing tickling the skin of the other. Maybe something like the 'attack of the sloth' sleeping position. You on your back, Gojo's arms and legs wrapped around yours, leaving you completely enabled, his weight crushing you when you sleep; but you never complain.. well.. sometimes you do, Gojo's body is like a furnace.
Sometimes though, Gojo wants you to spoon him from behind. Of course, he loves it the other way around but theres just something so comforting about your small frame wrapped around his back. He feels so safe in your arms like this. He gets the same feeling one would when they were a kid, afraid of what was lurking in the dark, but the moment they pulled the blanket over their head, they were safe. Gojo felt untouchable, even more so than when he had his infinity on.
Geto:
A classic man, a simple man, a man of taste. I can see Geto loving the pretzel position. Him lying on his back, his toned arm above his head while his other wraps around your frame resting against him. His leg closest to you is bent, enabling you to interlace your leg with his, the appendage thrown over his thigh. He relishes in the feeling of your arm wrapped around his midsection, feeling safe and secure when you tuck you curl your fingers into his t-shirt on the side of his body.
He loves this position because he loves how close to you he feels, he also likes to see the size difference between the two of you when you're scooted down, your head on his chest. Another plus is he can scratch your back gently this way. His hands always find their way under your shirt, gently tickling and scratching the skin of your back, shoulders, and waist. He adores hearing you hum softly into his chest in approval at the relaxing caress.
You love this position for a variety of reasons as well. With your head on his chest, directly placed over his heart, you have free, unlimited access to the soothing rhythm of his softly beating heart, never failing to lull you into a peaceful sleep. You yourself were also guilty of slipping your hand under his shirt to feel up his abs. Running your fingers over the strong indents, counting them carefully in your head over and over, was the same to you as counting sheep. His skin was always so soft and warm, how could you resist?
Nanami:
Nanami's go-to is having you lay fully atop him, your head on the center of his chest, your bodies resting against one another while he strokes your hair. softly running his hands along your head, raking his fingers on the back of your neck, massaging your head, the whole nine yards. Nanami doesn't stop until he hears you lightly snoring on top of him.
Another thing about Nanami--if you drool or snore in your sleep, Nanami thinks it's the cutest thing in the world. You're always so embarrassed when you wake up and see the wet patch on his shirt after you had a particularly deep sleep, but Nanami finds it endearing; it means you felt safe with him, your body fully relaxing and letting go in his presence.
Another favorite is good ol' spooning. Nanami loves to be the big spoon. With both of your jobs as Jujutsu sourcerers, comes harrowing losses and injuries one cannot prevent, no matter how hard they try. So when Nanami gets the opportunity to completely encase your body in his strong, protective arms, it eases his nerves. He is constantly worrying about you, but in this moment he knows, nothing will touch you, nothing will get past his loving embrace.
This position gives Nanami unlimited access to the back of your neck. His lips instantly connecting with the soft skin, pressing soft kisses to the skin there, peppering down your shoulders, his fingers moving your nightshirt out of the way to touch your skin directly--god he loved kissing you. Your skin was so sweet and warm, how was he not supposed to kiss it? It was right in front of him after all.
Choso:
I have said this about Choso countless times, but he is a titty man.. so of course he's going to lay his head on top of your chest. He loves to feel the softness of your breasts agaisnt his cheek--if you have bigger breasts, you better bet he will lay face down and squish your tits around his face, holding his breath while he presses the fat against him, relishing in the feeling of your soft tits on his face.
His hands are without a doubt, on your chest as well. His large, warm hands engulf your tits in his grip, unconsciously feeling you up in his slumber, making you smile and laugh to yourself. He also loves wrapping his arms fully around your body too. The curse nuzzles his head against your chest while he slides his hands under the small of your back, his hands tickling the sides of your waist and back softly with the little mobility he has like this.
He has never felt love like this before, so when he feels your hands wrap around his back like it's the most natural thing in the world, it has his face heating up, a deep crimson blush spreading across his face while you rub his back, your nails raking over his back, over or under the thin material of his shirt. No matter how often the two of you cuddle together like this, he never fails to mumble how much he loves you into your chest, occasionally raising his head to look at you with a pout, still embarrassed even after all the time you spend together.
When you lean forward to press a kiss to his forehead, your fingers caressing his cheek before he drops his head back down to your chest to welcome the embrace of your arms around his body, he swears he's the luckiest man in the world.
Sukuna:
Your wrists and ankles are bound in chains while you sleep at the feet of his throne completely naked. <3
Toji:
I can see Toji being a fan of the 'pretzel' as well, same as Suguru. He gets a little more handsy most times, the hand he has wrapped around your back will creep down to the waistline of your night shorts. His thick fingers slip underneath the waistband, sliding under the band of your underwear as well as he grips as handful of your ass, massaging the fat in his hand, squeezing and rubbing it with his fingers.
At first, he did it as a way to tease you, and it worked, you always lifted your head to give him a stern look while he continued to massage the skin. Over time though, It became a comfort thing for the both of you. Whenever you're tired but Toji isn't, he'll turn down the volume of the TV in your shared bedroom and let you get comfortable on his chest, your ear resting where his arm and torso meet. He slides his arm around your frame, smiling to himself when you nuzzle and cozy up to him, his hand sliding down your back, rubbing up and down a couple times while you get situated.
When you get yourself to your desired position, throwing your leg over his hip; which meets his hand as he grabs it and pulls you over his pelvis more, caressing the side of your thigh soothingly; he slides his fingers into your underwear and stares groping you, his warm hands bringing you instant comfort, and familiarity. He'll continue to absentmindedly feel you up while he watches his show, his eyes occasionally darting down to look at you with softness in his eyes before he leans forward to press a kiss to the top of your head, drifting off soon after, leaving the TV running all night, as usual.
Megumi:
I imagine Megumi being super touchy with his significant other in private once he gets comfortable with you, but I still see him being a little awkward and shy about cuddling with you. It's so intimate after all. The two of you probably started with you lying on his chest with your hand resting on his tummy, you would have to make the first move because Megumi would rather die than initiate something like that at first, no matter how badly his body was itching to feel your warmth against him.
His body would go completely rigid when you laid on him out of nowhere. Megumi would hold his breath, not daring to move even in inches in fear you would move off of him. The weight of your head and your hand that was softly rubbing his tummy felt so comforting, although it did make goosebumps rise all over his body in shock. You would have to tip your head down to avoid him seeing your smile from hearing his heartbeat race out of his chest, the organ taking a significant amount of time before he gets used to your embrace, the rhythm slowing.
After a while of being together and countless cuddling sessions, I can see Megumi being more confident in initiating cuddle sessions when the two of you are watching TV or getting ready to go to sleep. His favorite positions are all of you cuddling him. You spooning him, him lying on your chest while his legs intertwine with yours--any position where your hands are wrapped around him and constantly caressing him in some way he is a huge fan of.
He also loves listening to your heartbeat. He didnt understand how you were always so calm, the soft lulling rhythm never failing to take him away to dreamland. He felt like he was going to have a heart attack every time you even smiled at him, but that was one of the things he loved about you--someone had to initiate the intimacy in the relationship and it sure as hell wasn't going to be him. If you weren't so forward, it probably would've taken him a year to even hold your hand on his own, so he was grateful you were more forward and verbal with what you wanted, because internally, he wanted the same as you, it just took a little coaxing to get him there.
Yuuij:
Yuuji has no preference! He loves each and every position, he just loves to cuddle with you. If he could always be touching you in some way, he would, and he sure as hell tries. You want to lay on his chest while he rubs your back? done. You want to spoon his large frame and wrap your leg over his waist while his fingers tickle your calf? done. Yuuji is ready for each and every cuddle position you propose to him, and he is not afraid in the slightest to initiate the cuddle sessions either.
I think Yuuji would find great joy in lifting your shirt up and crawling inside as much as his body could fit. His head resting on the soft skin of your tummy while your shirt blocks out most of the light emanating from the TV. "It feels like I'm a baby again." He would say, holding your hips in his hands on the outside of your shirt, his fingers tickling unconsciously along your sides, making you giggle.
I think Yuuji would really like coming home exhausted from training to sit in your lap and lay his head on your shoulder, his back arching slightly from the height difference between the two of you. He would hum into the crook of your neck while you stroked his back, raking your nails along him. He would smile to himself and close his eyes when you lift his shirt, scratching his warm skin directly while he falls asleep on your lap for a midday nap.
He was quite heavy and you're unable to breathe very well while he sleeps, but luckily he never naps long, and you do admit his weight crushing you felt weirdly nice, along with the ticklish puffs of his breath against your neck--it makes you feel close to him.
Yuta:
Yuta is a big baby. He handles enough in the Jujutsu world, trying to keep up his tough, strong persona while fighting, all he really wants when he comes to you is to relax completely in your embrace. Another man who loves it when you cuddle him from behind. He loves feeling your leg wrap over his waist, he knows he's not small, but he loves to feel like it sometimes, it's comforting.
One of his favorite positions to cuddle with you during the day is his head on your tummy/pelvis, his hands stroking along the length of your waist while you tangle your hands in his hair, running your nails over his sensitive scalp, down the back of his neck, reaching as much of his back as you can. It lulls him right to sleep, and he loves it. I think Yuta would struggle with falling asleep/sleeping through the night from insomnia, but when you're touching him, your warm embrace engulfing his body, he almost forgets about all the sleepless nights he spent without you by his side.
I can also see him loving to cuddle while facing you. Your head in his chest while he wraps his arms around you, and you likewise. Your legs tangled together, your bodies pressed as close as possible. During the summertime, this position is not the most comfortable because of the heat and the somehow awful AC Jujutsu high has. So during the colder months, the two of you constantly find yourselves in this position. He keeps his hand pressed snugly to the back of your neck, making sure your forehead stays pressed to his neck at all times.
#jjk fluff#megumi fluff#jjk megumi#megumi x reader#itadori fluff#yuji fluff#yuuji fluff#yuuji x reader#itadori x reader#gojo fluff#nanami fluff#geto fluff#choso fluff#toji fluff#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen choso#jjk crack#jjk toji#jjk gojo#gojo satoru x reader#gojou x reader#choso x y/n#choso x reader#nanami x reader#sukuna smut#sukuna fluff#yuta fluff#yuta x reader#yuta okkotsu
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hiya jadey! A hotchner!reader x spencer request for you <3 Maybe Spencer comes home a little tense/snappy from a case and reader misinterprets it as anger towards her so she starts clesning and catering to what she thinks Spencer needs so he isn’t angry at her anymore? (even thought he never was.)
She sort of regresses into what she did when her adoptive parents weren’t pleased with her :(
love you love you love you superstar!
i love u <3 | fem, 1k
cw past emotional abuse
The door to Spencer’s apartment closes with a distinct clunk. Certainly shut too hard.
It sends a horrible feeling deep into the very pit of your stomach. Like you could cry, then and there. You frown at the odd feeling and stand to shake it off.
Spencer’s home.
“Hey,” you say, calling without seeing him, making your way into the living room from his kitchen to find him at the door.
His bag looks heavier than usual on a slouched shoulder, his hair puffy. He must’ve showered before they flew back into Virginia and air-dried his short curls. He drops his bag on the floor, scrubbing his face, nose and eyes screwed up tightly as his glasses push up to his forehead.
“You okay?” you ask.
His face flickers. “Fine.”
It’s not the greeting you’d wanted. Maybe you’re egotistical or something but you’d at least expected a hug. He’s the one who invited you over, surely he wants to see you?
The queasy feeling worsens.
You give him a little kiss on the cheek to test the waters. “Missed you.”
“Yeah, I missed you too.”
You aren’t convinced. Spencer rubs his face again, trudging to the couch to lay down.
You send yourself into a tailspin. Looking around the apartment, you can see why he’s unhappy. You left your cup on the coffee table, your handbag on the armrest, there’s so much to clean up and put away.
His silence means you did something wrong.
He asked you to be there. He left you the key. But maybe he didn’t really want you there after all.
When you were younger, you’d get home from school, and a half hour later your father’s car would park in the driveway. You’d get this feeling, then, a tenseness, not necessarily fear but anticipation. Some days it wouldn’t matter, and most days he’d come through the door like a animal to be coaxed into softness. You’d convince him to be angry at something else. Enable his fury, agree with every word he said.
Smiling, calmed, he’d walk into a spotless kitchen and find a pan soaking in the sink. I just wish you’d have some fucking consideration, he’d say. Or, Really? Or he’d sigh like he couldn’t believe it and slam a cabinet door.
Nothing was right. You weren’t worth any patience.
“Dove?”
You peek around the doorway again, your tidying having taken you to the kitchen to wash your cup. “Yeah?” you say.
“What are you doing?”
“Just– just cleaning up.”
“It’s fine. It’s clean, don’t worry about it.” He frowns at you. “Are you okay?”
“‘Course.”
His frown deepens. Spencer only ever frowns when he’s confused. When he’s upset he tends to press his lips together in an accidental pout, and when he’s angry, he’s stony. Spencer’s good at profiling because it’s his job. You learned it at home. Seeing anger in things most of all.
“I’m fine. Are you okay?” you ask, wiping your hands on your shirt. “Sorry, I should’ve asked how the case was. It was tough, right? It– I mean, they’re all tough.” You smile as you sit on the couch beside him, one leg tucked underneath you.
He shakes his head. “I’ve missed something. I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong.”
“Nothing’s wrong.”
“You’re not acting like yourself.”
“Sorry.” You wince. “I thought you were having a bad day?”
“I am. Or, I was.”
Spencer holds out his hand. When you take it, he pulls you toward him with the care of someone who knows what it’s like to be startled, shuffling toward one another to be knee to knee. He holds your arm like it’s all of you, pressing you to his chest.
For a while, you just sit there. Quiet, almost silent, the apartment rests around you. Spencer frowns at your hand as he draws lines up and down your arm, but slowly his frown softens, and you realise your stress has faded with it. Spencer isn’t angry. And if he were, it’s not with you.
“Sorry I shut the door hard when I came in,” he says.
You feel caught. “It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine. Today was really bad, I got into it with Emily and the case… I don’t know. But coming home to you…”
Spencer curls your fingers over his hand and presses them to the underside of his chin.
“Thank you for coming over,” he says. “Did you eat?”
You can’t help smiling, turning your hand slowly to cup his cheek, to hold him still. “I was waiting for you.”
“Well, you decide and I’ll go pick it up.”
“I can’t come with you?”
“Do you want to?” He turns into your touch, glasses pushed against his eye, his lashes on the lense.
You take back your hand. “Sure.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, we’ll walk. It’ll be nice, the weather’s not too bad.”
“You feel okay?” he asks.
“Worried about me?”
“What your brother might do to me,” he says, nodding into the joke. Then he cracks just as quickly and tugs you in to hug you sideways. “Worried about how I made you feel.”
It wasn’t Spencer’s fault, but you don’t want to talk about it anymore. You push up taller than him to encircle his head and neck, pressing your nose into the soft crop of his hair. He squeezes the small of your back with similar gusto. “Got my wires crossed,” you mumble.
”Want me to uncross them?”
You say, Please, and Spencer pushes you away from him to put your arms firmly on the right sides of you, uncrossing you, and kissing you on the nose.
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction
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Through Me (The Flood) - secret baby fic Simon Riley / female reader - warnings: panic attack, PPD
"Does tomorrow morning work? I'll be heading to base immediately after. Want to make sure I have enough time to say goodbye."
"Yeah, we'll see you then."
Simon goes to bed early that night.
He's good at clearing his mind and willing himself to sleep, hovering just barely there on the surface, never dipping too deep, and has done it for years. It enables his ability to rest in even some of the most uncomfortable circumstances (and that includes Johnny's snoring). It's compartmentalizing at it's finest, something he's tried to impress upon the sergeants too, over time.
Learn how to do this. It may save your life.
The pendulum swing keeps him somewhat aware, connected to a very small piece still tethered to the conscious world.
It's how he hears his phone ring at twenty hundred.
The caller ID flashes your name and he picks up immediately, sitting straight up. "Hey-"
"Hi, um..." You're crying. He flips himself out of bed, already partially dress, and manages to locate his shoes in a millisecond.
"What's wrong?"
"Can you... can you c-come- take the baby for a little while?" Your exhale whistles through the phone sharply. "P-please. I know you- you're leaving tomorrow but I-"
"It's alright, I'm on my way. I'll be there in a minute. Are you okay?"
"I- I... don't know wh-what to do." You're hyperventilating, caught in the grip of something, scared and alone. The sidewalk stretches for miles, his lungs burning as the oxygen stays trapped in his chest from the weight of his fear, and the line goes quiet, call ending as he makes it to the lobby of your building and up the stairs.
The copy of your key he never returned gets him inside, and the first thing he notices, or realizes, is Orion's screaming. He calls your name, yells it, beelining for the nursery where the baby lays on his back, hands and feet wriggling wildly in the air, tears coursing down his cheeks as he wails. "Alright, Ry, alright. C'mere, I've got you." You're not in here, not anywhere in sight, and his stomach flips.
You have to be here. He just talked to you.
But you wouldn't know how to signal him if something was really wrong, would you? He didn't prepare you. If something happened, how would you tell him?
He tucks Orion into his arms, cradles him to his chest, and bounces him gently. "Hey, you're okay, you're okay. What's all this crying about, hmm? What is it? Where's your mama?" The crying gentles, barely, and Simon holds him at a distance, quickly, checking him over. He's not overheated, he doesn't seem to be hurt, he's freshly bathed and in a clean onesie. His nappy is new and doesn't need to be changed. "Mama took good care of you, huh? You're all clean, fresh nappy, ready for bed, aren't you bub? Yeah." Simon paces in a circle, trying to settle his cries, before lowering him back into the crib. "You stay right here, little man, alright? Close your eyes. Daddy's gonna find mama and he'll be right back."
You're not in the living room, and he finds your bedroom dark when he opens the door. For a very brief moment, his panic blooms into paralyzation, before he spots the light from your bathroom.
His heart breaks when he opens the door.
You're on the floor, back against the vanity, sobbing with your palms covering your ears. You look like you haven't showered in days, and your light blue t shirt is soaked, slicked to your breasts and belly.
There's no distance between the two of you in this moment, no barriers, no time, no need for space. He kneels, and you look up, tearful eyes telling him all he needs to know. "I'm here, mama. I've got you."
You go into his arms willingly, diaphragm heaving with tiny hiccups and sobs, unable to catch your breath. Your entire body shakes, and wraps himself around you, holding you tight where you've buried your face in his chest. "I- I'm s-sorry." You're hoarse, voice cracked and broken. "He w-won't stop."
"Shhh, don't worry about that right now, just take a deep breath." You shake your head.
"I can't."
"Yes you can." You're frozen, panicked, and he smoothes his hand over your head. "You can do it, honey. Try f'me." The baby is still crying, and with the bathroom door slightly ajar, it bounces off the tile, all around you. Simon grimaces.
He's fine, he's safe. He's in his crib.
Simon shuts the door.
"Breathe with me, alright?" he maneuvers you so that you're in his arms, laying on his chest, face tipped back to his. "Just follow me," he pulls the hand that's gripping onto his forearm like rebar away and places it over his heart, "like this." You try and try to sync your breathing with his, and once you finally get there, evening out slowly, he kisses your hair. "There you go, good girl."
Simon keeps you close, happy to hold you, even if it was in these circumstances. It's so selfish, so wrong, but he can't find it in himself to let you go, waiting long past the point when you've calmed down to finally speak again. "Can you tell me what happened?"
"He... he wouldn't stop crying. For hours and I... I tried everything, but I felt like I couldn't breathe and I felt... dizzy, and when I went to feed him he didn't want me and I was crying too, but I felt so- so mad at the same time, and I didn't know what to do so I j-just put him in his crib and came in here and c-called you. I don't kn-know what I did wrong-" your breathing slips into shallow territory again, and he rubs your back.
"You didn't do anything wrong. He's okay, he's safe. He's even got a fresh nappy on. You made sure you took care of him, which is all you need to do, okay?"
"I feel awful," you whisper, drenched in shame, "he needs to eat, and I just- I abandoned him."
"No, you did the right thing and took a break. There's nothing wrong with taking a break." You sniffle, pulling the sopping shirt away from your body, shivering with discomfort. "Do you want to try again? See if it goes any better?" You give him a frightened look, unsure and nervous. "I'll be right here with you."
"Okay."
"Let's go see your mama." Orion has worked himself into a state, and it tears Simon to pieces, guilt about leaving him in here ripping through his heart.
He feels responsible. He is responsible, at the end of the day. If he had been upfront with you from the beginning, this might have never happened. He would have been here. You would have the support you need.
He was supposed to take care of you, but all he did was make it worse.
He kisses Orion gently. It helps quell the anxiety growing like a plague inside him, worry and fear about leaving you on your own for weeks, or more, chipping away at his resolve. He tells himself you'll be okay, that you did it on your own before he came along, and that you can do it again, but the admission of another dizzy spell doesn't make him feel any better in the long run.
"Don't worry, she's okay now. She loves you so much, you know that? She takes such good care of you, all the time. Even when she doesn't feel good, doesn't she?" He doesn't turn the lights on to your bedroom, and finds you on the bed, sitting up, wet shirt discarded on the floor. He doesn't rush it, doesn't push you, even though the baby cries at the top of his lungs in Simon's arms.
Finally, you hold your hands out. He helps get Orion settled, stroking his cheek over and over until he starts to instinctually seek you out, latching after a few long minutes.
Your eyes slip closed at the silence and you lean to the side, nestling into Simon's chest.
He holds you. You hold his baby.
How it was always meant to be.
He whispers above your ear, working his fingers into the knots of your neck, your shoulders. "You're doing great, mama." You hum but stay quiet, head down, fingers stroking over Ry's cheek, again and again.
"Thank you... for being here. I know things are complicated but it means a lot that you would come. I'm sorry I freaked out, about your job. I just... it's a lot to take in. I don't really know how to feel. I need some time." That's good, he thinks. Better than last week, when you asked him to leave with tears in your eyes. There's hope. He can fix this.
"You can have all the time you want sweetheart, but... I need to ask you a favor." Orion's body full relaxes, little fist clenched in the swell of your breast falling away, and you sigh.
"What is it?"
"When I'm away... I can turn my phone on every now and then, in specific places. D'you think you could send me some pictures? Or maybe I could call, when I'm able?"
"Of course."
He stays most of the night, until the sun comes up. Gets Ry back down, stands watch while you're in shower, helps you get settled in bed. There's a special place in his heart for you when you're soft and sweet and sleepy, a tiny kitten, curling up in the palm of his hand, purring. His moon. His everything.
"You be good for your mama, okay? I expect a good report when I get home. And try not to grow too much, alright little man?" He kisses his head, holding it there, walking around in the kitchen with Ry in his arms. "I love you, Orion. You and your mama. I'll be home real soon."
You turn the corner, something clenched in your hands, what, he can't tell, and you smile sadly. "I uh... I have something for you." He cocks, his head, shifting the baby to one arm, and you hold your fist out. "It's kind of dumb, honestly, but I thought you might... I don't know. I thought you might like it. I made it myself." It's a small fabric square, embroidered with a constellation, Orion's, he recognizes now, and a compass. "It's so you can always find it in the night sky. If you're in the northern hemisphere it should be south west, and if you're in the southern, it's in the north west. I didn't know like, what you could take with you but I figured this is small enough..." You look embarrassed, and all he wants to do is pull you into his arms and kiss you.
But he can't. He can only whisper your name, thick with emotion.
"It's great. I'll use it every night. Thank you." You blink, eyes wet, and then nod. He glances at his watch.
"Time to go?"
"Yeah," he hands you the baby, and picks up his duffle, the weight foreign now but still familiar. "Take care of yourself, alright?"
"I will."
"Promise me." He's stern, pushing a little bit of lieutenant into it, and you agree again, quickly.
"I will." You follow him to the door, holding Orion up for him to kiss one last time, and then he presses his mouth to your forehead, pleased when you don't pull away. He's dragging it out, the reluctance too ripe, and finally hangs his head in defeat after the too short minutes tick away.
"I'll see you soon." He gives you one last look, memorizing your face, Orion's, as much as he can, before heading down the hall.
"Simon," you call, turning him on a dime, "be careful, okay? Make sure... make sure you come home." Home.
"I will. I promise."
#peaches writes#through me (the flood)#simon riley#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#this writer abuses ellipses
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