#I just hope they don't ruin the model style

[im-just-a-ghost]

Waiting for them to remake Animal Parade next.

[mirohlayo]

Could you do something about the drivers' new girlfriend who is obsessed with the reader? Who is the driver's ex-girlfriend? and eventually the driver's and reader end up together again. (a little inspired by Obsessed by Olivia Rodrigo

Hello !! I really struggle to choose between the drivers but I ended up choosing Lando (it's no longer surprising). Hope this suits your request, enjoy ! ᥫ᭡

OBSESSED

( when your ex' new girlfriend become obsessed with you, you know you have win everything. )

warning : angst, fluff, some toxic behavior, like two innuendos

note : sorry to all the Maddie it's just the first name that came up on my mind 🫰

word count : 1.9k

You're sure this whole thing has been going on for a few weeks now. And you don't know when it's going to end. It's been several weeks since your relationship with your ex-boyfriend Lando ended. And he's had a new girlfriend for several weeks now.

Sitting in front of a table on a terrace, near the Mclaren building in the paddock, you can't help but stare at your ex and the brunette girl in his arms, walking hand in hand along the path. Her long hair styled in a magnificent bun, her model figure, her confident walk.

You can't help but imagine yourself in his place. Because after all, a few weeks ago, it was you in this place. It was you who walked alongside Lando, who came to support him on all his races, who was proudly in love with him. And his new girlfriend simply replaced you. Because she is also the reason for your breakup.

Everything was perfect in your relationship. You were madly in love with each other and incredibly happy. He gave you the world and in return you gave him everything he couldn't have dreamed of. You were simply soulmates, made for each other. Until this brunette comes and ruins everything.

You knew she was friends with Lando. However, it was absolutely no problem for you. She's not the first girl he's had as friends and you can't deny the fact that you have a few guy friends as well. You trusted each other with your eyes closed so there was nothing to worry about her.

But when she started to interfere in your life, your personal relationship, when she started to get closer to Lando at a maddening speed and when she stole his precious time so that you remained the one who finally spent less time with him, you knew there was a big problem.

And that this problem is indeed her.

It's as if the roles had been reversed, and in the end you gradually became a simple friend, while she in turn became his new girlfriend. You couldn't take it anymore, even though Lando tried to reassure you about her and her actions.

He himself didn't want her.

But it was so suffocating that you finally put an end to it. You knew that at the time of your separation, when you said those words to him that broke his heart into a million pieces, you still had powerful feelings for each other, but love isn't everything.

And here you are now in this situation. You being his ex, staring at him and his new girlfriend when you just came to support the Mclaren driver. Lando has publicly announced that you have remained on good terms and are good friends, which is why you sometimes come to the races. But the reality is there: you don't even look at each other once.

Because if Lando does, he knows he won't be able to let you go. And if you do, you won't be able to hold back either.

“Huh, what is she doing here again?” Maddie, the driver's new girlfriend, mocks your presence as her vicious gaze glares at you. "Hmm ?" Lando frowns, curious. He tries to follow Maddie's gaze, and his eyes end up landing on the woman he deep down still hopes will always be his.

“I already told you to forbid her from coming to the races.” She adds. The driver rolls his eyes and sighs, not taking his gaze away from you. It seems that you are strangely attracted to your phone. "I know, but... we're still friends, she has every right to com-" "Friends? You don't even talk to each other, and it's even she who decided to break up with you."

Lando clenches his fist and his jaw. “And because of whom do you think?” He looks at her coldly, while Maddie can feel a deep fury just by looking at his eyes. She was about to retaliate when suddenly Lando fans came to surround you. "Y/N!! I love you, can I take a picture with you?"

You slowly raise your head, surprised to see three young girls smiling pleasantly at you, waiting for a response from you. You finally realize the situation, and you show them your biggest sincere smile. It warms your heart, knowing that despite the hate you received after breaking up, there are still people there to support you.

Of course, they may be fans of your ex, but the fact remains that they are all simply adorable, and you can't help but be grateful to them, because after all these people support the boy that you love so much.

“Thank you so much, sweethearts” You can't help but giggle and even chat a little with these girls. But while you're enjoying this intimate moment, you obviously can't notice Maddie's dark and unhealthy gaze on you. She kills you with her gaze, while jealousy takes over her entire being.

For what ? Why can't she be like you? Why can't she be you? What does Lando like about you? What can she do to be like you? She would lose her mind. She scrutinizes each of your actions. She records each of your actions and gestures in order to copy them with the exact same precision.

It's toxic but she can't help it, for her it's vital and essential. She is obsessed with you, with everything you do, with your whole person. You're her current boyfriend's ex, and she knows how much he's still in love with you, so she's trying any way she can to be like you. She just wants to be better than you. But she can't.

And you know she can't. Just look at the way Lando looks at you, eyes full of love and admiration, as you listen attentively to the fans in front of you. Lando himself knows, no girl will be like you.

-

"No but seriously, she's doing it again!! Is this the how manyth time this week?" Your best friend is almost going to tear her hair out. Maddie's latest Instagram post has the exact same types of photos you posted last week, and her stories are identical to yours. You sigh, running your hands over your face. “Look, maybe she didn’t do it on purpose, it’s probably a coincidence.” You try to convince yourself.

"A coincidence? You still manage to defend your ex's new girlfriend while she does everything to discredit you!" Your best friend looks completely hopeless as she plops down on the couch in your hotel room. “Don’t tell me otherwise, Y/n. She’s wearing the exact same outfit as you in her post.”

“Maybe we just have the same taste in clothes, we don’t know.” Your best friend looks at you with empathy. She gets up from the couch and places her hands on your shoulders, caressing them gently. "Look Y/n, I know you're way too nice to be mad at anyone. But this girl is so obsessed with you, it's super toxic and unhealthy."

You can't deny your friend's words. In recent weeks, she has only copied you and used the same expressions and facial expressions as you. She only hints at you. Why is she so obsessed with you when you don't care about her?

It eats you from the inside. You've been thinking about it lately and it's almost sickening. Your best friend seems to have noticed it too. "I know what you need. I'm going to buy your favorite snacks and we're going to have a relaxing evening together tonight, okay?".

She does not wait for your approval since you already know you have no choice. And without another word, she rushes out of the hotel to go buy your favorite snacks. “What a life…”, you sigh before opening your phone again, coming face to face with Maddie’s latest insta post.

As you were about to open the comment section, you heard voices raised. As if two people were arguing with each other. You remain paralyzed for a moment, before finally continuing what you were starting to do. But as soon as you go back to your phone, the voices continue to shout and be heard louder and louder.

Panic rises within you. Maybe there is a real problem after all? You approach the door of your room to try to hear better, but without being aware of it you end up opening it, opening onto the long empty corridor upstairs.

Listening carefully, you know that the voices are coming from the room directly across from yours. But you also, and unfortunately, recognize Lando's voice. You can recognize it among thousands of voices, and you are sure that the male voice is him.

A higher pitched, more feminine voice mixes with the driver's voice. Without realizing it, you are now standing a few centimeters from their hotel room, facing the door. But you can hear perfectly what they say to each other. Despite their voices muffled by the walls, you manage to make out a few sentences.

“I mean, why are you so obsessed with her?” Lando shouts even louder. He's really fed up. "I'm not obsessed with her Lando!!" "Oh, so why are you trying to copy everything she does? Why do I always see you stalking her social media, location and contacts?" He continues to rise.

This last sentence makes her speechless. “She broke up with you, so I’m looking at her social media to find out why” Lando lets out a mocking laugh. Did he hear correctly? "Because you still haven't understood that it's because of you that she broke up with me? It's all your fault but you continue to play blind!!".

Lando's furious voice brings silence to their hotel room. It seems Maddie has stopped screaming. "I should never have accepted this PR stunt. I would have received hate but at least I could have been with Y/n right now, with the woman I truly love with all my heart and not a girl who is hopelessly obsessed with a woman much better than her.”

Several minutes of silence follow, but the din of your heartbeat seems to echo throughout the hallway. They were arguing about you. The reason for their argument is you. And Lando talked about you. He confessed information you didn't even know. That you didn't know.

He still loves you, and the whole damn new girlfriend thing is really just a PR stunt. So, everything is clear now.

You gradually regain consciousness, but the bedroom door suddenly flies open, Lando stands in front of you looking completely furious. But when his gaze falls on you, his body language shows that he is already relaxing a little more.

“Oh, Y-Y/n…” You lower your head, ashamed that he surprised you like this. He's not sure what to say as an awkward silence settles. “Did you…hear what we said?” You clear your throat, avoiding his gaze. "You were screaming so...yes. I heard everything." “Oh, okay…”

He scratches the back of his neck, embarrassed and very uncomfortable. “Maybe we should talk then” He suddenly offers and you lift your head to nod. "Yes, that would be better. In my hotel room if you want."

You both go back to your room, and Lando sits directly on the couch, while you join him by sitting a little further away, leaving a reasonable distance between you.

“I meant it. I meant every word I said, Y/n.” You nod to encourage him to continue. "Of course I think Maddie is completely obsessed with you and you must have realized that." He plays with his fingers nervously as he lowers his head. "But I also meant the fact that I still love you. So much. I'm still so in love with you that it hurts me to know that I can't wake up next to you anymore. I still want you so bad and I need you in my life. I know that our story doesn't have the right to end now and that it won't end until we're old and in love."

You wipe away a tear that had just formed in the corner of your eye as you take Lando's hands in yours. You can't suppress a small laugh - or rather a sob - as you smile lovingly at him. “Fucking PR stunt, huh?” He smiles shyly, his eyes watering from the tears that threaten to fall down his face.

“Yeah, fucking PR stunt and fucking crazy girl” He answers and you end up laughing softly. Your hands came up to cup his face as you moved closer to him, your hearts almost touching. "I still love you so much Lando. And I need you too. I'm sorry I broke up with you. I must have broken your heart and-"

"Don't apologize when it's not your fault, sweetheart. I should have cut ties with her a long time ago." He places a small but sweet kiss on your forehead. “I have the best girlfriend again and I have absolutely no plans to part with her.” You smile tenderly as you roll on top of him. “Good, because me neither.”

You kiss him gently on his lips, while he puts his arm around your waist and brings your head closer with his hand to deepen the kiss. He can't stop kissing your soft lips, because he missed it so much, he can't resist.

He slowly pulls away so he can just get a clear view of your face, while resting his nose on yours. “In the end I think I’m the one who’s completely obsessed with you baby.” You giggle, stealing a little kiss from him. “No need to tell me, I already knew that. A certain fake account of yours on Instagram was only watching my stories”.

He blushed violently at your words. "Fuck. Am I really a bad stalker?" “Well, not as bad as Maddie.” He bursts out laughing and tightens his embrace around you. “Good to know I'm better than that girl” He ends up diving back in for another kiss, this time more intense and more passionate.

He moans weakly as he lets himself into the kiss. Suddenly, the bedroom door bursts open to reveal your best friend. You both look at her, surprised. But to your relief, she rolls her eyes in a mocking grin and half-closes the door, before adding, "I think I'm finally going to cancel the netflix and chill and leave you to a romantic sex night."

You throw a cushion from the couch at her, but she manages to dodge. “Fuck you!” You shout at her as she continues to make fun of you. “You should say that to me, right?” Your boyfriend gives you a mischievous grin full of innuendo. You gently hit him on the chest as your best friend finally leaves, closing the door.

“Tomorrow, she is dead” You add, already thinking about what revenge you are going to prepare for her. “I think you're the one who will be dead after what I'll do to you tonight” Lando continues to add in order to tease you and despite your annoyance, you can’t help but giggle shyly. “But first, I want to cuddle you” You tell him before pecking his lips.

“I don’t ask for anything more” He ends up confessing before kissing you again, not being able to hold back the smile that forms on his lips.

After all, maybe it's true. Lando is ultimately the most obsessed with you. But as long as it's him, you know it'll never be a problem for you.

[pretend-i-do-not-exist]

Under Spell, Right From The Start

Synopsis: He insists you're nothing special... but if that's the case, why do you cross his mind so often?

Pairing: Lucifer, Mammon, Satan, Belphegor × MC (separate)

CW: Gender Neutral MC, You/Yours, Fluff, Crushes, Spoilers for lesson 16 (OG) in Belphie's part, A smidge of angst in Belphie and a drop of it in Satan's too bc I couldn't resist

A/N: HEY HI!! So this is my first post, for this fandom specifically, and I'm still trying to grasp my writing style, so I apologise if it's a bit everywhere and not the best. However, if you do enjoy this trainwreck that I call writing, feel free to leave me a request. I'd really love to see some :]]] Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and HAPPY VALENTINES DAY ♡

Lucifer:

How could this be? The Avatar of Pride falling for a mere human? Impossible. He would never.

...Is what he said initially.

Over time, he found himself craving your presence

There was something about you that had him absolutely enthralled

Maybe it was the way you convinced him to take breaks

Or maybe it was the comfortable silence you settled in

You were doing your own things, but... doing them together? Even better.

Perhaps it was the way you learned to manage his brothers

#singlemomgetsabreak

That's a lie. He never gets a break.

#justiceforsinglemom

Now, you could manage his brothers

That doesn't mean you were always going to do it

He insists you're giving him grey hairs

But he enjoys having you around

And he cared for you, more than he wanted to admit to himself.

You're part of the family, after all :)

Mammon:

Pf- please. He's modelled for the biggest brands and has been on the covers of magazines.

He's got a line of demons waiting for him, and you think he'd get hung up on you? Yeah, right.

And he's definitely not trying to grab your attention when you join him for his photoshoots

And he'd never get pouty when you can't hang out with him because you've already made plans

Why should he care?

Oh, but he'd give anything for your attention

MC, he quite literally will run across the Devildom for you if you call

He's your first!

If he isn't by your side, and you aren't by his, then what's he gonna do??

He's greedy. That's what he is.

He's the Avatar of Greed, and you're his most valuable treasure.

Satan:

He has his books, he has his knowledge, and he's very content with it all

The last thing he needs is anyone disturbing that peace for him.

But... you.

He strangely likes his peace even more when you're there?

You could both be doing your own things in mutual silence or you could be talking about a new book the two of you are reading (that is if you like reading)

You make him feel even more at peace than if he was on his own

Then it hits him, he doesn't enjoy your presence, he enjoys you.

He's thinking about you when he's reading a new novel

Imagining you both as the protagonists because he's shaking the thought out of his head

Because you wouldn't want that, would you?

He's taking his time doing more and more little things for you

Annotating books

Letting you borrow books from him

Recommending books to you

It's all worth it to see that smile on your face

He just didn't realise it then

Belphegor:

He hates humans and you're no exception.

He just needs to get out of this stupid attic

Then he'll show them all

He's said it before and will continue to say it: this exchange program is a bad idea

... Because he's met you.

You're ruining this for him, I mean why do you have to be so beautiful?

Why do you have to be so nice?

Why are you so eager to help him?

You don't know how he's...

It. Doesn't. Matter.

You're human.

That's not gonna change.

Even after the murder, he finds his thoughts recircling

You- you're forgiving him? After everything? How??

More importantly, why does his heart swell with hope?

Hope that things can work out between you two

It's a crazy dream of his, that's for sure

Speaking of dreams, you're frequenting them more and more

He thought that it would be the opposite but boy was he wrong

His dreams are simultaneously becoming his worst nightmares because as sweet as they are while he's asleep...

Nothing quite dispels that feeling of disappointment when he wakes up again and you're not there.

[lesb0]

A Treatise on Pop Celesbians/bis 🌈✨

(by someone who only listens to music from the 15th-16th century)

I'm super happy that tiktok is making it possible for small artists to breakthrough and blow up BUT when it comes down to chappell, sabrina simply slays more and is the better artist. She genuinely loves being a pop princess, has so much fun on stage, and started serious singing lessons back at Disney ages ago. her work is more cohesive and better produced, her stylist is doing really well with establishing her silhouettes, her vocals are stronger, and she also naturally has the adorable Disney girl look that the industry eats up which propelled her career so fast

chappell is purposely drag "ugly" which is very fun and will def get her some Halloween costumes this year, her fun little songs are so catchy and cute, but the production and style and her skill level needs a lot more work. Beyonce wasn't good at first either, remember when she was just solanges off key pretty little sister? I love that she's a successful rags to superstar story and she is really bringing the community together rn, it feels good. but, she doesn't know how to be famous. It's making her extremely depressed and miserable. She sings improperly for a soprano and it's going to ruin her vocals. quickly. she HATES having a fandom. she was reeeally lucky the pandemic algorithm picked her up right before the great tiktok boom but that doesn't have longevity. also I know she's freshly out but I can't be obsessed with a new lesbian who totally disregards lesbian culture. it's just so blah to see another drag queen appended onto male culture. I just want to see Dykey Dykes who are super proud to be one of us, cultural-historically and all, not a sad hag adopted by gay boys.

Billie adores her craft and has the strongest vocal signature out of anyone on the charts by far, she's an incredible artist and is the most mature performer. She is so protective of other famous women in general even though she started out as a baby in so many precarious positions herself. I know shes going to keep making good catchy music about loving pussy. I hope she puts some effort into learning production because obviously her brother doesn't want to do her sex songs LOL

Muna Absolutely EATS at vocals, punchy beats, they have such a strong sound and the butchfemmebutch thing is so, so powerful & sexy & real. They are thee perfect band imo. but the stylist is so inconsistent with branding that I couldn't recognize them as the same band I learned about from my gay friend in 2020. they're constantly serving cunt. but only the good taste lesbians are there to eat it.

Zolita has released some absolute bangers but her vocals haven't kept up with her high production standards and the rebranding from vampire to nun to barbie to cheerleader isn't helping her establish a solid pop artist identity! she should've stayed in the indie zone, dark and whispery and gothic was her thing. But I love that she's never shyed away from aggressive out and proud lesbian aesthetics and marketing, I still have her lesbian sex stickers on my laptop!

peach prc sacrificed getting 1m+ views early on in her career to be an out lesbian. she's a good singer, but she's stuck singing about her ex boyfriend because that's what got her the #1 single. I love her adorable fairy femme4butch aesthetic even if her music isn't good

As for JoJo I don't know WHAT she's doing with the whole troll cringebait thing but it's funny and shes rich enough to take care of generations... It's very responsible that she's keeping the new annoying dyke brand away from her little girl brand at target, she's growing into a good woman which is rare to see.

King princess CAN be a good pop artist but she's too inconsistent. she has a billion dollars and doesn't need her career anyways she's just having a good time.

I still think Hayley kiyoko could've been the queen of dyke pop if she would've dropped acting and modelling but she really is such a triple threat in talent and has the right looks that there's no way she shouldn't come out really successful but she is a woc so there's a whole different standard and many darker elements at play when considering the racism to killing her career.

I don't know why st Vincent moved into doing pop for 5 seconds. but Los ageless is my jam. Annie has been disappointing for a long time!

[boxwinebaddie]

to all the guardian angels watching over me --

for you, my treasures, i am working on a gift,

something to lift our spirits while i lift this curse.

( god, i wish i had taken PE a bit more seriously. )

now, it's not much...

but because i've been experiencing alot of stress/panic attacks lately, if you are looking for a little hurt comfort, but mostly comfort, i am writing up a little think piece about Ravesey!Style X Anxiety, what situations/subject matters might be stressors, nervous tics/tells,

and, naturally...

...what the other boy might do to comfort them. <3

again, it's not much ( i wish it could be more, but alas, i have been trying to write for months and my hands hurt almost as much as my heart does ), but i wanted to try and ease back into writing things again, i am inspired endlessly by your requests/questions, would like nothing more in the world than to answer them and hopefully heal the world with a little hate...from ravesey style.

( so you better smile, pendejos. )

but first, a sappy, crappy thanks from ur poorly functioning uncle.

many of you have asked what my days are like ( i'm sorry i got a little graphic and morose down here, but on the bright side, i'm only five ft, so it's far less stuffy than six feet under, right? khlks. what can i say! even as a gallows girl, i'm shallow. <3 call that preposthumo(ro)us. )

buuut anyways, a lot asked how to make my dog days better but tbh? i'm a cat person ( i miss lily :/ ), so i don't need compliments.

your company is more than enough.

( tho, i do 'preciate the gifts you're leaving on uncle death's doorstep )

...so, um...

*rubs neck nervously and accidentally strains it*

Thank You. :'}

on terribly hard days, ( any sans you ) when i wake up with the skin on my face red and broken open after another round of failed antibiotics from another lazy er diagnosis that i don't have/but must because my voice shakes when i talk and i pick my skin when i'm scared, my body heavy, puffy and yet far too light from exertion, a disgusting jaundice yellow against the bruise blue tile of my bathroom floor, trying not to gag as the nauseating, patronizing voices of ugly male doctors echo in my ears with this horrible thing brewing in my body like poison...

..i open your messages, i read your kind words, tell all the loud men in lab coats to shut up, i put the dnr down, and decide...to save myself.

i sit up slowly so i don't get whiplash or come crashing down to earth, ( yk, i've heard it hurts to fall from heaven, but then, hells not far off. )

i think about how if i don't do this, no one will relentlessly hit on my rant park girls and ruin their day, i think of what little silly drink i will weakly brandish in my hideous, chewed up hands for my bev check that day, it helps if i imagine us all together at a picnic table one day, laughing, smiling, drinking our drinks, just dillydalling the day away,

a perfect, beautiful day.

talking about our perfect, beautiful boys.

just me and my perfect, beautiful girls.

but right now...

it's just Fucking. Me. again.

and this biohazardous BITCH who won't pay rent.

and i finally make it up for air, i savor it, then hold my breath so i don't scream at god or waste my very important air on another stupid arrogant man who won't listen and doesn't care, gritting my teeth so hard, all sound and movement softens ( a very sick kind of kindness ), stupidly clinging to my sweat-laden shirt, all cotton and rotten hope,

trying very hard to be 'good', to be a positive role model even outside of the classroom full of small children i loved very much but was too sick to send off to off to the kindergarten i prepped them for...these weird, funny, odd, special, tiny little people i raised in place of their rich, idle parents; tied their shoes, sang them songs, taught them to spell their names...and will probably never, ever see again.

-- but who would want me to practice what i teach and be brave and not cry as i try to remember which parts of the lymphatic system will release pressure in each sagging limb, painstakingly putting my broken doll parts back together by myself in that cursed fucking bathroom which knows me better than any ex i've ever had...

...and because of your strength, my loves,

i remember everyday why even though i am some woman's annoying, inept, yappy purse dog pomerainian that accidentally got dumped on the side of the busy highway, a dumb, useless, fancy, fluffy, fussy thing, doomed from the start, dead on arrival, taken and afraid, shaking in my siren clog hello kitty crocks, scared shitless, with no survival skills, no self-preservation, no strength, that somewhere, way past this horror movie scene, far beyond night that never ends...

crimson dawn B R E A K S.

and it looks a lot...

Like Your Smile. :)

HYH.

-uncle nina xx

[bosskie]

Practicing Different Mollucks

I have been practicing drawing Molluck, yet again, so here's some Molluck doodles:

I didn't use any 'specific' reference to these different styles, just mixed the things I have seen and my own ideas.

I didn't feel like posting these individually, like I kinda tend to do, mainly because I felt reluctant to post my stuff. As you can assume, that last piece is vent art; I felt so tired of this all and thought that I should stop doing art or any other content, yet again. What even made me draw those sketches was actually stress since I just keep feeling like my stuff ain't good enough, I'm still bad at drawing, and I should just keep drawing and drawing... I'm so tired of that stress... Like right now, I feel like doing other kind of art, digital stuff, since it's what makes me stressed out currently, my digital art skills... I don't know do I really wish to create stuff when it gives me constant stress... But I don't really wish to live if I don't create... I'm just so tired but I should just keep pushing myself to work harder... It's difficult to see life worth living. I don't even know why I keep trying, to see my Molluck fantasies outside my head? I just feel like insulting myself for being like this. But I still love this Gluk so much and it makes me feel bad to look at that sad Molluck drawing... Like I wish that I could hug him tight...

I feel sorry for posting these... My mind just tells me constantly how my stuff is just some trash that ain't worth seeing/sharing... It's not even unusual that I feel sorry for posting my content... Well, 'don't like, don't look', I guess... I can understand if someone doesn't like Molluck and it's totally okay. Molluck just is something so special for me and it's difficult for me to get into any character, like only if I can see myself in them, which is very rare. Kinda related to this, no, I haven't continued my Molluck model since I have been too busy with 'my animations'... I cannot help myself but I cannot resist his as... tonishing beauty! He is just the hottest stuff ever... I still don't really care if I'm a 'weirdo' for only wanting Molluck, for not being like 'a normal person', since this is what I am, 'odd'. My problem is just that I insult and hate myself... I have never given a fuck when I have been bullied at school since they wanted my attention but they didn't deserve it and I knew that the attention would have made it only worse. I'm just saying that I'm used to be not caring about what the others think about me but I don't still wish to feel like unwanted and that my existence is a burden... I don't even really wish to affect others since I don't think that I'm able to really do any good, I'm only making everything worse... That's why I also sometimes think that this blog has been a mistake, I should have stopped posting any content online like I planned years ago...

I'm really sorry... I wish that this was different. I wish that I'm not ruining anything here, am a burden... I don't know what else to write but I just don't assume that anyone even actually likes to see my stuff... My mind just keeps telling me that everyone actually hates to see me posting... I don't even know why but my ill mind just has so much hate toward me... This is so tiring and discouraging, making me feel like quitting... I don't really know what you see when you look at my stuff since I tend to only see my flaws and that it's some low quality stuff... But I still hope that you can see something positive. I just don't really feel like I'm good at drawing and see the love I put into my 'art'; I often more like think that my stuff looks soulless... I really wish that I didn't need to vent but I'm so tired of this all... But like I have said earlier, I'm still trying to fight, even if I really don't know if this is worth it or why I even do it...

[xojennyboo]

A/N: This one is a long one so I hope you all enjoy. Thank you all for reading my stuff. I appreciate it very much. Don’t forget to comment, like, and send in any requests that you might have. I’m open to anything. Enjoy!

Working as a personal assistant for a famous celebrity can have its perks. For one, you get to travel a lot, with some of the expenses being taken care of. You also get to keep yourself busy. This can be a pro and a con.in my case it can be both. Sometimes, depending on what's going on, you have very busy days and late nights. Some of these days requires strategic planning.it can get hectic but you liked your job. You currently work for a very well-known celebrity. You work for none other than Harry styles. You're worked with Harry for about three years now. You've gotten to know him professionally and somewhat personally. You've created a great professional bond with one another which created a great work environment. At first, some people thought that you two were dating due to the back-and-forth banter and flirting. You would be lying to yourself if the thought hasn't crossed your mind. He is very attractive, has a nice sense of humor. And is very kind to everyone, even those that have done him wrong. But reality hits you like a giant truck every time you get your hopes up because you're just his assistant. Nothing more, nothing less.

Today was your first day back from the holidays. You were single yet another year, but you have gotten accustomed to being by yourself. For the holidays you decided on going track to your hometown to spend time with your family and friends. it was a much-needed trip for your mental health. You're currently back in London at the café getting some much-needed caffeine into your system. Once your order was ready, along with Harry’s, and you made your way into the office. One thing you enjoyed about London was that is reminded you of back home. it was always busy, and you didn't have to worry about purchasing a car to get around, since the office was located in central London. You walked into the building and said good morning to the receptionist before taking the elevator to the top floor. Once there, you walked your way into Harry's office, which was empty, and placed his iced coffee on his desk. Then you made your way to your office that was across his, stunned by a box that was wrapped in Christmas wrapping paper.it had a red bow on it. You closed your door, walked to your desk, placing your belongings on your chair, before looking at the cute green tag that was attached to the box.

The gift was from Harry. You hadn't been in the office since before Christmas since he insisted you take a vacation. You sat down and slowly touched the box, not wanting to unwrap it since it was wrapped so nicely. ‘What could it the?’, you thought. You took a deep breath and opened the present, nicely so you wouldn't ruin the wrapping paper. Once it was removed, you saw that he had gifted you an iPad, the latest model, an Apple Pencil, and a pair of AirPod Max. “What the actual fuck Harry", you mutter to yourself stunned at the very expensive gifts. You realize that there was a small note attached to the inside of the wrapping paper. You open it and see Harry's handwriting. ‘Y/n, for starters, no you cannot give this back to me or whine about it', you giggled to yourself knowing that it was the first thing that you would do once you see him. ‘Second, this is a small gesture for the hard work that you do for me and around the office. You don't go unnoticed. Merry Christmas. I hope your new toys will make your joy just a bit easier. Love, Harry'. You placed the note down and you couldn't help but smile. You've mentioned wanting these items way back and you were surprised that he remembered. You were still gonna give him shit for spending so much money on it.

The day flew by. You haven't heard from Harry all day and you hadn't seen him all day either. During the day you busied yourself with setting up your new iPad. You made sure that all of the important dates were in your calendar along with your scheduled to do list. This iPad definitely made things much easier. You synced everything with your phone as well that way any changes can be backed up. Once you were done you looked at your monitor screen in front of you and you saw that it was already 7pm! You abruptly got up from your desk and went out into the office to see that no one was there. You were alone. ‘Great’, you thought to yourself. You left the door opened from your office and sat back down. 8pm should be a good time to leave. One thing you enjoyed about your office was the view. Since the New Year has just started the London streets still had their Christmas decorations up. Twinkly lights adorned the trees and light posts, and you just admired the view. It was definitely a sight to see. A knock on your door scared the shit out of you and took you out of your daze. “Fucking Hell”, you look back to see Harry standing by the door frame with a satisfied smirk on his face. Your hand placed on your chest that was currently going up and down at a fast pace due to the almost heart attack that Harry gave you.

"Did I scare you?", he says walking in and closing the door. "Yeah, you did. I thought I was by myself”, you say, looking outside again. You near him chuckle to himself and hear his footsteps walking closer to you until he was standing right next to you looking out the window. No wards were exchanged for a few minutes just the two of you enjoying the view in front of you. it was then too quiet, so you decide to break the silence. "Thank you for the gifts. You didn't", he placed his hand up silencing you causing you to furrow your eyebrows in confusing. "Did you read the note?", he asks. "Yes", you say, rolling your eyes. "Good. The gift was nothing compared to all the work that you do", he says. You stayed silent, smiling to yourself at his playful behavior. "Why are you here so late?", he asks. "I lost track of time planning your schedule and mines", you say. "Have you eaten dinner yet?", he says averting his attention from the window to focus on you. "No. Last time I ate was probably around lunch time", you say, realizing that you haven't eaten anything since 12. “Not good y/n", he scolds. He leaves your side and walks towards your desk using your computer. He takes a couple of minutes and then takes his place beside you again. "I’ve ordered us dinner. I hope sushi is okay”, he says. "Sushi sounds great but you didn't have to Harry. I was about to leave anyways", you say, focusing on him now. " Why do you always say that? ‘You didn't have to' Or ‘you don't have to’. Y/n I want to do these things for you. I know I don't have to I want to " he says looking out the window. "Why?", you ack and you see his jaw clench at the question.

"Because you're a good assistant", he says. You roll your eyes. "Bullshit", you say. His attention goes to you now. "What?" he says. "Bull. shit. A normal boss doesn't gift his assistant almost 2K worth of gifts Harry let alone have dinner in an empty office", you tell him getting slightly irritated by the mixed signals. His phone chimed and he started walking out the door. "Our dinner is here. Till he right track", he says leaving you in your thoughts. You take a deep breath and talk some sense to yourself. Maybe you're overthinking his gestures. Maybe he's just being friendly and appreciates your work and this is his way of showing you. There's no way he could catch feelings for you. After all, you're just his assistant. Nothing more. Nothing less. You calmed down a bit and sat down on one of your beanbag chairs on the floor. Harry gave you the freedom to decorate your office just how you wanted. You went with the comfy and relaxed vibe. Harry soon came in holding a big bag and two drinks in his hand. He closed the door behind him with his foot and waked towards the other beanbag chair across from you. He took out the food and you were astounded by the amount of sushi the ordered. You couldn't help but laugh at it. He opened one of the containers and started eating. "What's so funny?", he asks with his mouth full and furrowed eyebrows. "It looks like you ordered sushi for the whole office”, you giggle causing him to laugh as well. "Stop making fun and eat", he scolds again and paints towards the container in front of me with his chopsticks. "Yes daddy", you say not paying any mind to it and eating your sushi. Harry stops chewing and looks at you. "What?", you question. He clears his throat and mutters a ‘nothing' before continuing to eat.

You placed A piece of sushi in your mouth, and you couldn't help but moan in satisfaction to how good the sushi was. You are Harry shift a bit in his seat as he avoids eye contact whilst you eat in silence. You continued eating and you couldn't help but let out another round of pleasure at hour good your food was. “For the life of me y/n stop with the noises before I take you on this floor right now”, he abruptly says causing your eyes to go wide, mouth slightly open with your chopsticks midair with a piece of sushi that you were about to put in your mouth. Did he just say what you think he said. "Eat your sushi and close your mouth. I'm already tempted to put my dick in it especially after your little outburst a little while ago”. Yep, he said it. You slowly put the piece of sushi in your mouth while maintaining your eyes locked on Harry. Two can play at this game. Once you but the sushi in your mouth you let out a moan, this one with a bit more erotic. You finished your sushi and stood up to throw your trash away, Harry following. Before you could go back to your seat, Harry took a hold of your wrist to pull you towards him and smash his lips to yours. Your eyes were wide at the sudden action, but they soon closed taking in the moment. This kiss was filled with want and lust and desperation, from both sides. You could've never imagined that Harry would be kissing you in the middle of your office. His hands gripped your waist pulling your closer to his body. You could feel his hard dick against you causing a small whimper to leave your lips. Your hands were around his neck, deepening your kiss more as he bit your bottom lip.

Harry pulled away to catch his breath. He placed his forehead against yours do you both breathed heavily. "Fuck one been wanting to do that for quite some time ", he says stepping forward, causing you to step back. These movements repeated until the back of your thighs hit the edge of your desk. "Gosh you make it so hard to resist you ", he says, placing small kisses down your neck. You couldn't help but giggle. "How?", you innocently ask. "That's the thing. It's just by being you", he says planting a peck on your lips. "Do you trust me yin?", he asks you sincerely. "Of course, I do", you say, placing a hand on his check and caressing it for comfort. "Let's see where this leads us". He says. You furrow your eyebrows a bit confused. "For tonight?" you say. He smiles at you placing another kiss to your lips. He places his hands under your thighs to pick you up and sit on the desk. "For tonight. For every day”. He says as he starts rubbing small circles on your thighs. "Let's see where this goes. Me and you. I know you feel the same way", he says looking into your eyes. As much as you wanted to say yes right away, you couldn't help but listen to the voice in the track of your head telling you it was a bad idea. "What will everyone else say? That y/n, the assistant, is messing around with the boss? ", you say looking down to your lap and watching his hands rub your thighs. You liked his hands. They were big. You liked the rings adorning his fingers, and you couldn't help but think of the many times that you would imagine his hands roaming around your body. "What if we keep it between us? I mean you're with me almost every day, so that wouldn't be surprising. Were also friendly with each other so that also wouldn't be weird. But we can keep this romance between us a secret until we’re ready", he reassures you. "You would do that?”, you ask causing him to chuckle. "I mean I'm the same boss that gifted his assistant, who he has a crush on might I add, an almost 2K gift", he says making both of you to laugh.

"Okay", you say, his eyes lighting up at your answer. "Yeah?", he asks again, his smile widening more. "Yes", you reassured and that was all it took for him to attack your face with kisses. He went around your desk and removed the expensive gifts he got you off of the desk. Then, with the away of both of his arms, swiped everything off your desk. He sat down on your chair, your back still facing him. Once he was situated, he grabbed your waist and did you across your desk causing you to squeal and laugh. He spun your body around so that you were now facing him, and your legs hung off your desk. "There goes that pretty face", he says wheeling the chair closer to you so that he sat right in between your legs. His arms circled around your waist pulling you closer. He looked up at you, smiling, but then puckering his lips wanting a kiss. You kissed him, fulfilling his wishes. Without breaking the kiss, he stood up, cupping your face with both of his hands, titling your head lack enough to deepen the kiss. He licked your bother lip wanting more access to your mouth. You opened it, allowing his tongue to explore yours, a moan emitting from his mouth as you allowed him more access. Your hands were placed flat on your desk as you leaned back a bit allowing Harry's body to slightly hover yours. His lips left yours and dissed down your chin and onto your neck. Your head leaned back slightly to give him more access. His tongue explored your neck, licking, kissing, and biting at your sensitive areas. "Can I touch you?", he asks causing you to laugh. "I'm pretty sure wine skipped the part where you ask. I think it's safe to say that I give you permission for you to have me, however. You. want", you say giving him pecks after each final word. He hummed in satisfaction. "I like the round of that", he mumbles against your lips, going back to the same intensity as before.

You felt his hand reach down to the hem of your t-shirt, sliding underneath it to palm your breast causing a moan to leave your lips. He squeezed your breast a couple more times before he removed his hand completely and removed your shirt. Your blue bra on full display to Harry's eyes. "Fuck", he whispered. He reached behind your back and undid the clasp to fully remove your bra. He leaned in towards your chest and took one breast in his mouth causing a moan to leave your lips and your head to fall back in pleasure. " No princess. I want you to watch me, he says slightly biting your nipple making you flinch in pleasure and more so that you were looking at him. He continued his torture, his eyes never looking away from yours as he swirled his tongue around your sensitive nub. His other hand palmed your other breast, pinching your nipple as he bit the other. After he had enough, he licked up your chest, your neck, and attached his lips to yours. You pulled him closer to you, his body hovering again, causing you back to lay flatly on the wooden desk. He attacked your neck again, a small whimper leaving your lips indicating your need for moan. He pulled back moving down your body, his fingers attaching to the button of your jeans. He undid the button and zipper removing them completely off, taking your panties with them.

Once every item of clothing was removed from your body, Harry sat back down on the chair in front of you. He positions your legs up your feet flat on the desk. "Fucking hell. You're soaking darling. Is this all for daddy?", he says, repeating the nickname you had said earlier. Realization hits you then. He likes being called daddy. "Yes", you gasp, wanting his mouth down there. "Yes, what baby girl”, he says blowing air on your wet pussy causing you to gasp. "Yes daddy", you breathlessly say. He smirked at you before dipping his head between your legs. He placed small kisses up your thigh, biting both of them making you flinch. He kisses your lips and sucks them before kissing your swollen clit. "yeeesss", you moan finally finding some sort of relief. He wraps his arms around your thigh and pins you down as he devours you. His tongue swirled around your clit sucking here and there spreading your legs a bit further apart for more access. "Fuck daddy. That feels so good", you moan, reaching down to attach your fingers in his hair. Harry groomed against your pussy, the vibration causing your grip to tighten on his hair. His tongue dipped down into your wet hole collecting all your juices on his tongue. His tongue felt so good on your pussy. He licked up your sit and sucked on your clit again but this time you felt his fingers go inside you. The endless times that you daydreamed of him taking you like this. You held yourself up by your elbows allowing you to see every movement that he made. His fingers thrusted inside you, the clacking of his rings hitting against each other turning you on. He pulled, his fingers still thrusting, and spit on your pussy, making you more wet. He continued flicking your clit with his tongue curling his fingers upwards causing gasps to leave your lipa. "Fuck baby. Just like that", you moan, feeling your climax coming. He liked the sound of that because he fingered you at a faster pace and he was eating you out sloppily. You couldn't hold back your moans, them echoing in the office. Your back arched as you felt the bubble in your stomach about to explode. " Fuck daddy. Don't stop. Don't stop. Fuck", you felt his fingers curl where you needed to. You came all over his fingers, euphoria engulfing your body. Harry removed his fingers but continued his attack on your clit. He licked you up clean.

You were gasping heavily as he kissed up your body until he reached your lips. "Taste yourself baby girl. Taste how sweet you are", he says holding his glistening fingers towards your lips. You take ahold of his hand and wrap your lips around them, your tongue swirling around them to collect your juices from his fingers. " Fuck that mouth of yours feels so heavenly around my fingers. I wonder how it would feel around my cock "he says removing his fingers out of your mouth. "Why don't you find out daddy", you smirk pushing him off of you and removing yourself off your desk. He sat back down on the chair; you kneeled down in front of him in between his legs. You pulled down his sweatpants, taking his briefs with them.it is hard cock spring free and slapped his lower abdomen. You grabbed his warm cock into your small hands and pumped it once. Precum was leaking out of the tip. " Can you take it baby girl?", he asks, taking a hold of your chin to meet his eyes. "Yes daddy", you say placing a small kiss on the tip. You then swiped your tongue, collecting the precum, moaning in pleasure liking how he tasted. You put only the tip in your mouth, swirling your tongue around causing Harry to hiss and push his head back on the chair. You put more of him in your mouth, hallowing your mouth to create tightness around his dick. You pumped what you hadn't put in yet, sucking him off little by little. Harry moaned as you gripped his cock tightly, bobbing your head up and down. "Fuck baby girl. That feels so good. I'm pretty sure you can fit all of me in that pretty mouth of yours", he pants out. You moaned against his cock and put him all in your mouth, his tip hitting the back of your throat. You relaxed your mouth in order for you to adjust. Profanities leave his mouth to do you suck him.it is hand goes down to your head, gripping your hair. He thrusts upwards, the sudden intrusion making you go on him. You're both moaning, tears streaming down out of the corner of your eye from the actions you were performing. "That's right baby girl. Just like that. Take daddy's cock", he moans out. You feel his dick twitch inside your mouth and you deep throat his dick, allowing his cum to slip down your throat making for an easy cleanup.

You remove his dick out of your mouth with a pop, standing up in front of him, your breasts directly in front of his face. He wraps his arms around your thighs and immediately takes one in his mouth. This time around it was more aggressively, and you loved every second of it. He released your breast with a pop and reciprocated the same actions with your other breast. "You did so well darling", he smiled up to you. Your fingers caressed his head, his eyes closing in pleasure. You straddle his hip, facing him, and kiss him deeply. You could already feel his dick getting hard beneath you. Your hands around his neck, your lips tasting one another, you began to more your hips against his, your wetness sliding on his semi hard cock. "You look so beautiful darling. I'm gonna fuck you senseless", he warned. You could only smirk at his revelation, wanting him to do exactly that. "Do it", you simply say as you reach down between you, grab a hold of his dick and position it by your entrance. "Go ahead baby. Slide down my cock for met, he says, a hiss coming out as you inserted him inside you and slid all the way down, a moon leaving both of your mouths. You position your hands on his shoulders and start moving. In this position he was so deep inside you. His hands were on your ass, moving you up and down his dick at a steady pace. "Your pussy feels so nice and tight baby. I may not last that long ". All you could do was nod. Your movements increased in speed already feeling that bubble within you forming again. Before you could continue, Harry stood up and placed you on the desk again. He grabbed your legs and spread them wide so you both could see. He thrusted inside you at a fast pace, one hand moving towards your neck, the cold rings on his fingers cooling your hot skin. By this point you're yelling his name. Both were a panting and moaning mess. His grip on your neck tightened, the adrenaline getting the best of you. "Fuck Harry em gonna cum, I'm gonna cum", you say. "Cum baby. Me too," he pants. With a few more thrusts you're both cumming on one another. All you could see were stars due to the lack of oxygen.

"Holy fuck", he breathlessly says. You managed to look at him, his bare chest dripping wet. That's not sweat you thought. "Did I do that?' you ask pointing at him. He mustered a chuckle which still sounded tired. "Yes, you did baby.it was so sexy to see too." he kisses your lips. "Sorry", you apologize against him. He pulls back. "You have nothing to apologize for. That was very sexy baby", he says. He removed himself from you, looking around for paper towels to clean each other up. Once he found them, he gave you a piece and you cleared yourself. You Leah put your clothes back on and cleared up the mess you made. "Come back to mine?", he asks you. "Yeah?", you ask back. "I want you to. We can go shower together", he cheekily says stealing a kiss from you. "Or we could finish the dinner you got to feed the whole office", you say, picking up the containers and putting them back in the bag. "That also. Then we can shower together”, he says, getting your coat ready for you. “Yes, then we can shower together", you finally gave in as he put your coat on. "Yes!", he says putting on his coat next. Once you got your belongings, along with the expensive gifts he gave you, you walked out of the office and out to the cold crisp night of London. The cool air feeling nice on your not skin after your activities upstairs. Harry opens the door for you, and you get into his car. You couldn't remove the smile from your face. This was definitely a New Year to remember.

[ilovescaredysquirrel2]

So I watched Chicken Run 2 (is it knock off sequel?)

So yeah, Chicken Run 2 is technically a knock off since Sam Fell kind of stole the movie that wasn't his in the first place... but it was actually a decent movie? Dare I say it was, a GOOD MOVIE! Nothe first movie but it wasn't bad at all. I do think it got a little too dark, more than the first movie did. I mean, the first movie was dark but was dark because of the heavy topics like disability (Rocky's broken wing), racism (Fowler negativity towards Rocky for being American), and Mr and Mrs Tweedy keeping everyone trapped (could be symbolism for different things). I feel like this didn't have the same vibes as the first one but it wasn't a bad movie in general. Just like Barnyard and Back at the Barnyard, in which the knock off tv series was different from the movie but still funny and enjoyable. There is A LOT that didn't make sense from the first movie.

First off, WHERE WERE ALL THE LITTLE CHICKS FROM THE FIRST FILM? Molly was apparently the only chick and that doesn't make sense at all. Chickens usually lay more than one egg at once, and Rocky and Ginger probably had chicks at the end, along with Flower and other hens (one of them obviously being Bunty). Second, the art style looked slightly more Aardman when it came to the humans, the designs looked very different. Like, they looked like Victor Quartermaine wannabes. The biggest issue I had was Mrs Tweedy's new design and that I'm assuming Mr Tweedy went to jail so she married Dr Fry for money. Like, I know the studio had a fire and lost the models but did they have to make Mrs Tweedy look 20 years younger???? Like, they ruined her design! She was cool looking before, not "attractive" but just a plain normal looking woman. We don't have to make every female adult character be attractive, do we? Come on, Aardman! That was a bad move! Like, I liked that she looked like a plain ordinary farmer lady, even though she was the villain. They changed her design by making her body type look different and making her eyes bigger and more makeup. Third, I think if DreamWorks was doing their part like in the first one, it would be better but this wasn't bad. I'm mostly mad about the new voices though (especially Ginger and Fetcher's voice). Say what you want about Mel Gibson, but he does an amazing job playing Rocky! He's not the nicest person but he's not the worst either. Ginger sounds NOTHING like Ginger, Molly sounds more like Ginger than Ginger! Nick's new voice kind of worked but Fetcher was a big no! I think the new voice for Fowler did good, Nick was okay, Rocky was... meh but it wasn't as off as Ginger and Fetcher. I was so mad when I heard Ginger and Fetcher's new voices because they were so in character (especially my adorable mouse boi Fetch).

At least they didn't make Molly as bad as I thought she was going to be. I didn't think I was going to like her but I did! It's the girls-support-girls thing that really won me over and Molly helping Frizzle! I thought Molly was going a spoiled teen rebel but she wasn't! She was just an adventurous chick who was tricked by seeing a colorful van (I didn't care for that symbolism in the movie, it symbolised HT). I also wished more people from the first movie were working on it by understand not everyone could return.

The music was good, the art at the end credits made me laugh but it didn't feel like Chicken Run (they did Ginger so dirty tho). Anyway, that's my review on Chicken Run 2 sequel. Tell me what you think! This movie was still better than Wish! I still hope the new Wallace & Gromit movie makes more money though... If you want, feel free to write your own opinions in the comments

[aseriesofunfortunatejan]

Some quick Hundred Line comments. I am adding tags to these posts so before you read this, please note that this is coming from a place of being very familiar with Kodaka's works, loving some of them, but not being currently interested in his works. I'm watching from the sidelines.

The key artstyle and some of the character designs remind me of RAIN CODE more than they remind me of Danganronpa. Of course it's still the exact same people. But it's really just... Komatsuzaki's *current* style. It's slightly different. The main character in the key art, notably, looks like he comes straight from RAIN CODE. That blue haired OC-looking girl reminds me of Guillaume if anyone.

I'm getting bad vibes from the uniform they're wearing

It's 2024. Can whoever is drawing the sprites at this point learn to draw clothes? The shapes and shading on the clothes are disgusting. Like so deeply unappealing, and they don't look like normal fabric. I'm realising RAIN CODE seriously benefited from apparently using bust-up sprites.

The blue haired girl's design is so bad she makes everyone look bad. Her 3D model looks better in that it's funny. The two siblings(?) have cool hair, as much as the pink haired one looks like every Danganronpa OC ever, but their uniform is so ugly AND badly drawn it ruins their swag completely. One just looks like some "casual AU Angie" fansprite. The others are pretty bland looking but inoffensive to me.

I want to make it extra clear that I'm a huge believer that comparing everything Kodaka and his team create to Danganronpa is an extremely obnoxious way to be. Of course, he is The Same, Human Guy and some aspects are similar between all of his works - especially since he works with the same designers/artists. This is why if you like one author you might be interested in reading their other works too. But this game in particular takes elements from Danganronpa on purpose. It's extremely close, even just the music on the site, but also the enemies have Another Episode vibes, the big door looks like the one in Danganronpa 1, plus the obvious being stuck inside a school. This time they really went and did it.

I don't know enough about the game to make a judgement yet, but so far nothing about it is appealing to me. Not the designs, what little view into the characters and story we got, the gameplay. I also want to note that as a rule of thumb, I do not currently have an interest in playing Kodaka's new creations for a bunch of reasons. However, I bear no ill will towards him and Too Kyo Games and am hoping that his endeavours, current and future, in publishing his own works lead him to be compensated fairly for the popularity of his creations.

[undeadgoathead]

Love her or hate her, Barbie is iconic. I have no clue why she was stereotyped as an airheaded bimbo, when canonically she has been a doctor, astronaut, scientist, etc. Like most girls, I have fond memories of playing dolls with friends, and not-so-fond memories of siblings, cousins, etc ruining my toys, cutting their hair, covering them with mud, tattooing them with sharpies, etc.

In girl scouts, I remember each troop had to represent a different country/culture for world tolerance day or some such. So our project was singing the Barbie song in German! I still kinda remember the lyrics. 🎼Ich bin ein Barbie frau, en einer Barbie velt...🎶

On a side note, I also remember our troop representing the UK one year, because I was obsessed with The Beatles and JRR Tolkien. Good times, good times. I was a weird, nerdy kid, and I haven't changed much over the years. This is kinda embarrassing, but I played with dolls well into middle school. What can I say, I loved making up stories in my own imaginary fantasy world. Still kind of do, as a writer.

I had a Pocahontas Barbie... Hip to be Square Barbie...Of course I had the mermaid that changed the color of her hair and tail, depending on if the water was hot or cold...I had a slumber party Barbie with a soft body like a stuffed animal, so you could snuggle in bed. She also came with accessories like an inflatable chair, a box of pizza, a houseplant, and a globe. Perfect for 90s sleepovers!

One Christmas, I was gifted a special edition millennium Barbie for the year 2000. I was too young to understand collectibles, all I knew was it was the prettiest doll I'd ever seen, with her fancy gold dress and matching Christmas ornaments, and couldn't wait to play with it, so I didn't understand why everyone was so shocked when I opened the box and did just that.

I had a few of the Mattel pets, including a fluffy white cat, and a fancy Collie dog. Of course I had the sparkly white unicorn/pegasus horse with wings AND a horn, and a long pretty mane and tail that you could brush, braid, and style. I had a ton of horses in general. Including My Little Pony. And lots of dolls, not just Barbie, but also Polly Pocket, random stuffed animals, etc. Another random sidenote... I remember I used to watch a lot of PBS as a kid... I was fascinated by The Nightly Business Report... So I had my own version, The Nightly Horse Report, and all the new anchors, journalists, and correspondents were horses... Facepalm. 🤦🏽‍♀️

But in high school, I was an edgy, angsty teenager. I rejected Barbie as a sexist symbol of rigid gender roles and corporate greed. One of my aquaintances had dismembered Barbie body parts dangling from her backpack, which I thought was pretty cool. I also took the Barbies from a classmate's diorama when they didn't want them anymore. I don't know what book they were reading in the other Senior AP Literature Class, but it must have been a dark one, because the Barbies were scantily clad in plain white robes/togas, their hands were bound, they were blindfolded, and they were hanging from nooses. Yeah. Yikes. Anyway I used them for home decor in my college dorm, and even in my first apartment. Like I said, I only seem to get even weirder and creepier with age!

Then again, when I was a bratty teenage girl, my idea of feminism was misguided. In retrospect, I actually embodied a lot of internalized misogyny and toxic femininity myself. Joining the GSA (Gay Straight Alliance), poetry club, yearbook, and other extracurricular activities helped me keep an open mind and learn better social skills. But still, one of my favorite computer games at that age, was called Feed the Model, where you crash a haute couture high society fashion catwalk, and you throw tomatoes and other food at the model, hoping some of it lands in her mouth and she'll finally eat something for once, lol. Yes it was hilarious, but also problematic. I also frequented several feminist websites, including About Face and Adios Barbie. Again, I meant well, but the misandry was a little bit hypocritical.

Just like the Barbie brand is taking affirmative action to be more inclusive, I also eventually outgrew my "Hear me roar" phase, and embraced a more modern, intersectional sort of feminism and gender equality. Including a shameless appreciation for girly hobbies, such as dolls. Even in college, a roommate gave me a special Bjork Barbie with a handmade dress, custom haircut, and face painted with nail polish. He customized it himself, and it looked awesome and unique! Again, that Bjork Barbie remained dorm/apartment decor well into my mid twenties.

Now I'm in my 30s. I work at an antique store, and I do sell expensive vintage collectible Barbies to wealthy connoisseurs, as well as the cheap ones to little kids who only have a few bucks of allowance to buy used toys from secondhand thrift stores. So Barbie is still very much a part of my life on a daily basis. Grown adults pay hundreds of dollars for the right doll. I've had deep conversations with coworkers and customers about the magic of imagination, the nostalgic sense of wonder, and the simplicity yet complexity of children at play.

So I'm totally going to see that freaking Barbie movie, damn it! Who's coming with me?

[artsy-hobbitses]

Nightly music share while I work on commission drafts (Folks with slots will get invoices as soon as I have sketches at the ready!), and while I consider FMA: Brotherhood and Tiger & Bunny to be my all-time favorite series (Honourable mentions: Blackjack 21 and Young Blackjack, Samurai 7, Sakura Wars, Ranma 1/2, Ouran High School Host Club), Gensomaden Saiyuki was actually what got me wanting to write more/dig into more serious topics as a teenager.

Don't get me wrong/see this as a TOTAL endorsement of everything it was, because this anime was UNHINGED, and ABSOLUTELY NSFW in a MYRIAD OF WAYS which was, perhaps, not suitable for 15-year old me (Sure it FEELS AND LOOKS like a funny roadtrip with four bickering dumbasses until the COPIOUS CHILD ABUSE being handed out to nearly every character like tic tacs and at least two situations of incest come up) and not always in the best way, with an animation style that is serviceable at best and completely off model in some situations (Which is A SHAME because I had the artist's art books and her marker illustration work is painstakingly gorgeous/detailed), but one of the scenes which kind of burned itself in memory for me is the one attached to this song, which takes place when Cho Hakkai (The fellow being used in the thumbnail) has confirmation that his wife is dead after searching for her, and he's requested Sanzo (a very recaltricant monk tasked with getting his mass-murdering ass back in line) to pray for her over the ruins where she died.

And Sanzo, who religion-adversed at this point except when he's weaponising it for demon-killing agrees, but says something along the lines of "Fine. But this mantra isn't for the dead--it's for the living", at which point, over this music, you're treated to an absolute gut-punch of all four characters's cliff notes backstories that led them here, and how EACH AND EVERY SINGLE ONE is marred by tragedy my 15-year old brain was not equipped to deal with.

But it really cements that the anime's central theme is focused on living. Living through pain, through trauma, living for yourself as you are, living even when the world tries to tell you you're better off dead, living for tomorrow and the hope that things will be better, and if they aren't, then you fight tooth and claw to make it better for everyone who comes after you.

Saiyuki is... unique given that it's very selfish thematically that way when compared with standard anime. There is no fight for country, no trying to fix a corrupt system, no lofty ideals---they're messy, dysfunctional mercs on a mission, the good deeds are just Along The Way. These people, these heroes are fun and lively, generally altruistic even if they come in like wreckingballs and are very clearly attached to each other through the bickering (they've been A Team even in a past life, and they've found each other in this life against all odds), but are also jaded, very hedonistic, petty, flawed as hell, perverts, bastards and killers (mainly of demons, but still!).

And they make ZERO excuse or apologies for it---they'll get kicked out of monastries for being heathens, out of heaven for defending their 'blasphemous' choices and their friends and by god they'll do it again, and they'll fight god (this show has peak Fight God energy and they do it at LEAST TWICE), fate and everyone else telling them they don't deserve to or cannot love as fiercely or live as themselves they way they are.

Because theirs is song is for the living, not the dead; You, flaws and tragedy and sins and despair and all---fight and love and live in a way that's true to you, because you deserve to and because it's the biggest goddamn Fuck You to the uncaring Powers That Be.

(Also on a semi-related note to seal this deal, please enjoy their absolute banger opening themes)

[ggomomomo]

Roomies | 5 - Impostor

@felinettenovember

Read on AO3

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Switching places with his cousin had grown to be a burden on his end as he struggled against rabid fans and a hectic schedule. Adrien was insistent as usual, earning him a piece of freedom away from his overbearing father. Felix wouldn't have indulged him if not with the promise of a special favor if he needed it.

With his hair styled in a model-esque manner and loose-fitting top billowing in the breeze, Felix stretched his legs in the park to take a break from the photos. His lip subconsciously curled. Photos. It was a miracle that they even looked the same during the shoots. Same face. Same product.

"Hey Adrien! Want some water?"

Felix almost fell from the bench seeing Marinette jog up to him while holding a bottle of water. He took a second to stare at her before accepting. Did she know? Did she not know?

"You're lucky to have the sun out today." Marinette smiled, taking a seat beside him. "The weather's nice."

He channeled his 'Adrien' act, not knowing how to feel about his partner not recognizing him. But then again, he was supposed to fool everyone for the façade to be convincing. His grin stretched out into a lopsided one, and his shoulders arched downwards. "Yeah, I've been dying to get out for a while."

She snorted. "But you're still working."

"I'll live."

A pout graced her lips as she stared at the director and cameramen setting up for the next session of the photoshoot. "I wish Felix were here."

"Fe---Felix?"

A sigh. "He's . . . I don't know. I worry about him sometimes."

Worry?  Felix felt guilt stir at the bottom of his gut. Was it right to ask about himself while wearing the mask of his cousin? "He can be a bit . . . harsh sometimes."

"Harsh? Felix isn't harsh," said Marinette. "Sure, he can be blunt, but he's kind and sweet and gentle."

His pulse raced.

She tucked a hair behind her ear. "I was just worried that he might be misunderstood or that he feels lonely. Or I'm too bothersome for him."

"You're not bothersome." He bit his tongue instantly afterwards, deeming his reply a tad too hasty. He repeated more slowly. "I mean, he never said anything about you being a bother."

"I don't think a lot of people know but we're close. Really close." A small smile perched on her lips. "But you know him; he tends to keep his feelings to himself you know? And I don't know how to help."

A beat passed. And two. And three.

Felix remained silent. So silent that he thought his heart would take over their shared quietness.

"I can't speak for Fe," he began, "But I'm pretty sure he's happy with just you being around. If he has a problem, I'm sure he'll tell you."

"You think so?"

"I . . ." He mentally winced. How much was Adrien supposed to know about him anyway? "I haven't seen him as comfortable with anyone as he is with you. Which means you're important in his life right now. Knowing him, he'd do anything to keep your relationship from breaking apart."

"Oh," she murmured. "It might not seem like it on the outside but he's special to me too. I don't think I'd ever have the same connection with anyone else."

She looked straight into his eyes with an indecipherable expression. "It's just that we're so comfortable with each other that we don't need words most of the time. But I can't be sure all the time if I'm reading him right."

He sucked in a breath. She knew.

She knew.

He was stupid to believe that his Ladybug, his own partner, his roommate wouldn't recognize him in a heartbeat.

"When the time comes that words matter the most, you'll know how to use them," he told her quietly, reaching to the side to squeeze her hand.

Marinette chuckled shakily. "I hope so. I really don't want to ruin what we already have."

She turned to face him, a subtle gleam shimmering in her eye, and pressed her lips on his cheek. "Thanks for telling me. And good luck with the photoshoot."

Felix found himself in a daze as she left, not even giving him the time to register what had happened. His fingers touched the side of his face whilst heat crawled into his skin. 

[aberrant-webnovel]

Chapter 2 - Interview

Chapter 2 - Interview

I tapped my feet a bit while waiting patiently. I was brought to a waiting room at one of the labs after Auntie Harper found me and Silva. I wonder if Silva is going to be upset with me for not hurrying. She didn't want to get caught by Harper.

I just stared around at the room I was in. It's a white room. Bright, enameled paneling lined the ground. Easy to clean and looked nice. The ceiling has similar paneling to the ground, but some of the panels were a bit different. An electrical charge being linked to it caused the panels to glow and produce light. This type of lighting was common in the whole of the HQ.

There's a few chairs in here, but I'm the only one sitting and waiting. There are two doors. One of them links to the hallway I was guided through to enter this room. The other door led to one of the testing areas.

In the corner of the room is a screen. It's a standard liquid crystal display, but it's an older model so the body of it was a bit bulkier. Newer model are slim and sleek, easy to mount, and don't break very often. This one seemed in good condition. The picture quality was clear and the sound coming from the speakers were easy to understand. Not distortion at all.

[Thanks to the efforts of our local Vault Breakers, another important discovery has been made. Following in the footsteps of the great 60th Chief, the 61st Chief, Harper Dirge, has found recording devices from a recent foray into a Class 3 Vault. She and her personal guard had spent two weeks inside and returned with no casualties. The tech brought back seems to be able to be reverse engineered to give us new light on the purpose of the Vaults. "It'll be a few months before the tech will be implemented," says R&D Commander Varun Dirge. "We have also collected various records from the same Vault that we hope to be able to full study." Now we just hope that more enlightening information comes in future updates. Thank you for your time. I've been Lillian Moss from Igneol Broadcasting Channel 4 News. Stay strong, Domain!]

The outro played before product advertisements began to follow. But what was that about Auntie Harper? She just got back from a two week deployment?

"Geez, Auntie really is the best out there, huh?"

"Well she did learn everything she could from nana."

I turned around to see Silva closing the door behind her as she entered the waiting room. I didn't even hear her come in. She's always been like that, though. I wonder if she's trying to join the Scout corps?

Just kidding. Her dream has always been to join R&D.

"She didn't scold you too much, did she?"

"Oh I definitely got an earful. Every time I'm scolded, I'm just thankful she's my Auntie and not my mom. I'd probably be all worked up all the time like she is if I had to put up with that at home."

"Yeah, I can see that. I don't see her very much so her scoldings are rare. Seems like she let you stay, though. She on board with you enlisting?"

"She kind of just relented. Dad came in to save me from the "Fireball" and talked her down a bit. In the end, she said that if I can prove through the testing that I can join, then it's fine. After that, I just came right over here. Testing should be starting soon."

"Nervous?"

"Yeah, I am. I'm not very strong. But I don't want to fight, anyway. I want to join dad in the R&D corp. If I can prove that I'd useful there, then I can enlist."

I'm really proud of Silva. She was just a bit older than me, but was often picked on and excluded for being smaller and weaker than others. She has long, beautiful hair that seemed to make other girls jealous, too. They'd often throw paints at her to ruin the color. One day, she dyed it all blue and yelled at the girls. She told them there wasn't anything to be jealous and mean about anymore. She was laughed off, but all of us in the family saw it as the first time she fought back. That blue hair because her signature style and frequently touched up the color with dye. Ever since she found that courage, she studied and worked hard to learn what it took to join the Vault Breakers. Being her father's daughter, it was natural that she'd pick up whatever her dad taught.

"You're gonna make it, you know? Not a single person in the family thinks you're not capable."

"Yeah? Well I guess I gotta live up to that then, huh?"

"Yup! Live up to our expectations! You owe us!

"Oh, I owe you for believing in me, now?"

I missed our back and forths. Silva was shy, but she lit up when we'd talk and play as kids. Neither of us have siblings, but she was just like my big sister.

The door to the lab area creaked open and a tall, tired man came into the room, closing the door behind him. He had a clipboard with various documents. He flipped through a few pages and then looked up at us.

"Ymir Sorenson and Silva Dirge. Legacy applicants, yeah?"

He looked at us with a cocked eyebrow. I don't have any idea what kind of opinion he had of us. Our families were famous in this place, but it's not like everyone in our bloodlines was some monster of a soldier. Both Silva and I lack any of the intimidation or coolness that Auntie Harper or Gajjet had. I wasn't really anything like my father or grandfather, either.

"Well let's see if you're up to snuff. We're going to move to another room in the labs. I'll walk you through the legal paperwork and what to expect from our testing. Oh, and I'm Dr. Clive Earnest. Nice to meet the two of you."

Dr. Clive nodded his head like a tiny, informal bow as he greeted us. Then he just opened the door to the lab area and gestured for Silva and I to go inside. So we did.

The hallway we entered wasn't as bright and inviting as the waiting room. It was a narrow path over dark steel panels and steel framework for walls. The lighting was a series of old lightbulbs. That type of lighting was only commonly used in poorer homes since they were cheap to produce.

Through the hall was a doorway that lacked any door. It was just a passage through to a large section of the lab. We passed through with Dr. Clive following behind. Stepping into the lab was exhilarating.

The room before me was massive. High ceiling and long walled areas to allow plenty of room for all sorts of machines. As I walked into the room, my eyes were drawn to a work station at the back left side of the room. Different guns were being disassembled, tuned, and reassembled by a few diligent workers. I recognized something on the work station.

A Mk.6 Caliburn. I heard stories about how Gajjet used one of those when she was trailblazing through Vaults. It's a heavy gun, fires heavy rounds, and has an imposing black steel finish. The model over there wasn't my nana's gun. But it was the same kind of thing.

"Hurry the hell up, Ymir! You always stare at things and get left behind."

Silva grabbed my hand and started pulling me along. She was right. I did have a bad habit like that. Hopefully that doesn't hurt my scores in the test.

"Yeah, yeah! Geez! I'm coming!"

We hurried along to a room in another corner of the lab. It seems like there are a few private offices over here. Some were reserved for officers, others reserved for the testing. We went to an unmarked room, but not after passing some of the others. We saw the plaque for Uncle Varun's office, but his curtains were pulled so it wasn't possible to see into the office. Knowing him, he's hiding a catastrophic mess inside there and would be embarrassed to show it.

"Both of you, please take a seat in this office here."

Dr. Clive unlocked a room with a keycard and opened the door. There were two chairs with felt seats in front of a desk. Behind the desk was a nice faux-leather desk chair.

I followed Silva into the room. We each took a seat. I was on the right, she took the left. Dr. Clive sat down in the single desk chair and began to open up drawers in the desk. After a few, I saw two stacks of documents assembled and presented to my cousin and I.

"Start by reading the liability contracts. Once you understand them, I'll collect your signatures. Then we'll fill out the personal information documents."

I started the slog of reading through the contract. A lot of your standard clauses existed. We'd sign as proof that we're consenting to the tests. They possess a risk of physical harm at times, but the safety precautions were actually very detailed. In the event of physical harm, I won't take action against the Vault Break HQ. I would also be awarded compensation for medical expenses and given personal treatment by the Medic corps if I so wished.

I continued to read. As I reached the end, I nodded to myself and resolved to sign the consent form. I looked to Silva. A cold sweat was forming on her brow. The anxiety was clearly getting to her right now. I know Silva wasn't too strong and she was already worried about the testing. Even if she was just here to study tech and join her dad's team, but she still had to go through the formalities.

"Hey, I know you can do this. Even if it's hard, I'm gonna be here too. We're gonna pass together. Okay?"

"… Yeah. If you're going to be here and you believe in me like that, then I can do this too. Yeah…"

We both were resolved now. I trusted her to have my back, too, but I wasn't going to mention it. I didn't want her to feel any extra pressure. I know she was resolved, though.

"Then if you're both ready, please sign here."

I was presented the consent form. I signed it. Ymir Sorenson.

Silva signed hers after watching me. Silva Dirge.

"Thank you. Now, let's go over the personal information. We'll begin with simple stuff. After that, I'll interview you both."

We received the next set of documents and started to fill out the blank area.

[YMIR SORENSON] [AGE: 19] [BLOOD TYPE: B-]

[HEIGHT: 68 INCHES] [WEIGHT: 136 LBS]

[EDUCATION: SECONDARY SCHOOL, GENERAL EDUCATION]

[WORK HISTORY: WAREHOUSE ASSISTANT, DELIVERY DRIVER]

[CHARACTER REFERENCE: ?]

"Excuse me, but how should I fill out this part?"

I pointed at the section for "character references" and asked this question. Dr. Clive looked at it and nodded.

"Ah, well you're both legacies. We have a bit of preferential treatment to the family of our officers. The Dirge family and Sorenson family are long-standing and both have served the Vault Breakers. Just put the names of any family currently serving as Vault Breakers and we'll just be doing a short interview with them a short time later. As long as they don't refuse you to join, we'll take that as enough."

So we were going to get special treatment because of Auntie and Uncle? I guess I can't complain about that, but I don't love it. I wanted to really earn this.

"Well I'll put down Varun and Harper then. Silva, same for you?"

"Yeah, they're the only ones in our family currently serving."

"Then let's do that."

[CHARACTER REFERENCE: HARPER DIRGE, VARUN DIRGE]

I filled out the rest of the info to the best of my ability. It was just simple things like my address and and some contact info for immediate family. I gave them Harper's contact info since my mom couldn't speak. She wouldn't be able to talk on a comm system.

Silva gave Varun's info. He was probably the best for that. He did his research here and was a Commander to boot.

"Very well. Then let's talk about why you're enlisting. I'll be jotting down notes for reference. Let's start with Miss Silva. Please tell me your reasons."

I watched her lips quiver a bit. I don't think she was expecting to go first. If Dr. Clive was testing her nerves, then perhaps the test had already begun.

"My father, Varun Dirge, is an inspiration to me, sir. As far back as I can remember, I was with my father in his workshop at home trying to watch and learn from him. I may not be fit for battle, but I want to follow my father. So my goal is become part of my father's team in the R&D corp."

"That's very admirable. But just so you know, Commander Varun doesn't have a regular team. He only ever takes on two assistants here and instead delegates tasks to other teams in his corp. He also works most closely with Chief Harper. You intend to rise up in the field to the level of assisting our top brass, then?"

"Yes, sir. I've known about that from the beginning. I won't join my father right away. I will join the corpS and prove that I'm an asset to everyone."

"Thank you very much, Miss Silva. Now, Mr. Ymir, please tell me your reasoning for joining."

It was time for me. I didn't feel too many nerves in this test so far. Not even many now. So I looked Dr. Clive in the eyes and told him my reasons.

"I grew up hearing stories about my nana. Gajjet Dirge, the Hellion of Igneol Domain. She's a legend that won't be forgotten. I want to reach her heights."

"So you want to be like the Hellion? She was trained by Yorrick Bartman himself. Not a single Vault Breaker on the continent can hold a candle to those two."

"Yes, sir. I want to follow her path. But I don't want to just follow. I want to surpass Gajjet Dirge."

"…"

A moment of silence took over. I didn't know what Dr. Clive was thinking. Only that whatever it was, he began to grow a serious demeanor. He'd been lax and friendly til now.

"So do you know what the Hellion's greatest feat was?"

"The knowledge she retrieved and used to advance our understanding of the Vaults, right?"

"She escaped a Class 5 Vault."

"What do you mean? Something like that has never been found."

"Yorrick Bartman died in that Vault. He saved Gajjet Dirge and a young woman."

"A young woman…? You mean… mom?"

"That's right. She never told you that she was pulled out of a place like that?"

"Not exactly. She said it was Class 3. Wait, what do you mean a Class 5? Doesn't that mean my mom was surviving somewhere like that?"

"I think you need to somehow get her to tell you. I've read all the files that the last R&D Commander left on the topic. But we don't know what your mother went through. Only she can really fill you in."

"…"

Mom was found in a Class 5 Vault? Isn't that some place that's so terrifyingly dangerous that creatures have never been recorded? Aren't they supposedly strong enough to break out on their own? Why haven't I heard that a place like that exists?

"I can tell you this. It's not a secret in the R&D corps. We just have a policy that we don't talk to the media. We leave all that to the Commander. So don't go talking about this with the people who don't need to know."

"Yeah, I can do that."

Silva was silent for a few seconds, but then responded the same. She hadn't made any comments so far. I wonder what she thought about this stuff.

"So Gajjet Dirge, Yorrick Bartman, and a C-Ranker Scout called Carlyle were tasked with breaking into a Class 3 Vault. An initial entry brought back a report of very little aberration activity, but the ones that were encountered were tough. They were of a type we hadn't yet identified. The crew wasn't supposed to take too long with the job since Gajjet was one of our up-and-coming elites. She hadn't met a Vault she wasn't able to learn about and conquer. From her own report, it took about three days to reach the heart of the place. That's when they discovered your mother. After rescuing her, they seemed to have triggered a defense system. The three of them took six more days to fight through the swarms of unknown enemies. They made it to the blast doors and I think we all know the rest."

"So what was going on in that Vault?"

"We later tried doing some more investigations, but we discovered that something about the Vault changed. Now, even at the safest levels of the Vault, those aberrations were swarming. Multiple parties were dispatched, but there were too many casualties so we pulled out from the investigation. It wasn't until some started escaping that we had to act with urgency. An elite Runner team dispatched the escapees and a Breaker team was sent to seal the Vault. Since that day and even now, we have it under surveillance. We refuse to allow media anywhere near it. Because of the level of power those things have and how tenacious they are with trying to escape, we had to classify it as the first Class 5 Vault in history."

"So Gajjet made it all the way through that place and still escaped? That's where they found mom?"

"Yeah. But your mom couldn't tell us about it. She didn't have the clearest memory. Even after she learned to communicate through writing, she told us only about the same as what Gajjet reported. And only the last couple days or so of the escape."

"I don't know what she'll tell me, but I'll try to talk about it when I see her."

"Maybe you'll learn something nobody else could."

"Yeah…"

Mom. What have you been through?

[ideahat-universe]

I guess this is as good a time as any to talk about my relationship to the Dragon Age franchise.

It's actually complicated.

Before I played Dragon Age Origins I had never experienced a RPG with serious role play potential.

Pokemon doesn't really have a story or much characters and with the exception of Dragon Warriors 3 there was very little to customize and it was mostly playing out a pre-determined campaign. No moral quandaries, no branching solutions. That changed when I played Dragon Age Origins.

It was literally a spellbinding experience.

I had never played a game where your choices really mattered and you could have a multitude of different origins and that your party was an extension of your choices. Playing it with no knowledge of Bioware's writing tropes made to where I didn't know who was a NPC and who was a future party member.

It was so great that I went on to do a second run that was even better than the first. My female Dwarf who grew up in the slums with nothing but heartache to her name carved a future where the casteless could be equal and she, would the be the ultimate role model that can always lead people to believing they should never settle for unsavory roles they were given to play.

Dragon Age Origins has a lot of love.

But also, some hate.

I never managed to do a playthrough without bending my knee and putting it on easy if only for a boss fight or two.

The Circle tower is completely ruined by The Fade mission. It's so bad there's a mod that just gives you all the buffs you would have gotten from that excursion and drops you back on the other side.

The Dwarven mines is by far my least favorite moment in gaming period.

A horribly boring and titanically long tunnel where you get to learn the one piece of lore no one asked for. Jesus Christ, where is Planned Parenthood when you need it?

The elvish mission starts out strong but then it's back to delving through an abusively long cave to come out the other end. Are you telling me that there can only be one quest hook that can involve the poet tree? What a waste.

There's the Skeleton mission where if you can get over the hump of the defense mission it's only tolerable.

Everything scales with your level so there's no real optimal order beyond who you need in your party to better balance your team out.

The economy is very deflationary. You'll thank god for every potion that's for sale because it's not unlimited for some hideous reason (same with mana).

Oh man, and the Sacred Ashes good start but yet again, another dark and boring looking cave I spend hours trudging through just so I can get the really good character moments at the end.

Dragon Age Origins is not perfect for me.

But I still really loved the role play experience and the closest I ever came to replicating that was Rune Factory 4 and Dragon Warriors 3.

So when Dragon Age 2 came out I was ready to go, until I was given the grave news. You are not importing your character from Origins. Instead you are playing Medieval Shepard. And I already established that I don't like the general world of Dragon Age. Turns out, I don't like grim dark. I can accept it but when it starts being about stories of rape and racism I want to get out of that questline and hope to forget about it.

I'm invested in my character playing off the world, not the world itself. Kind of like how the average DND player doesn't really care about the world until their personal story starts being told.

This mistake was more or less fixed in Dragon Age 3.

But I was gone by then. Yeah, I'm not a particularly loyal consumer, a lot of people like that game too but at this point in my life I don't even like that style of gameplay so it's just not happening.

But now there's a fourth Dragon Age game.

The trailer for it. Is weird. It's like under some weird delusion that the side characters are supposed to be really cool and we should be excited to play them.

The side characters in every Bioware game are fun to play off of. They typically aren't very interesting in and off themselves. Good news though. You can import more or less the character from Dragon Age 3 into 4. I don't know why they didn't lead with that. The pathos of Dragon Age is everything and the weight of your choices is the pathos generator.

Are you telling me the tone of Dragon Age 4 is drastically different? It's not Grim Dark?

Can it even be Dragon Age if it's not Grim Dark?

Maybe that's a really bad trailer. I guess we'll have to see.

[sclfmastery]

as an artist, are there any super simple art tips that you know that improve a persons art a lot when they start using it? like, my teacher once told me to always have the corner of the mouth in line with the corner of the eye when drawing faces, and that's stuck with me for years, but i really want to know if theres any other nifty little tricks like that. BUT OBVIOUSLY YOU DONT NEED TO ANSWER im only asking because i really like your art and your lineart is really sharp in a way id like to one day be able to do some much simpler version of

Let me just preface this by saying I squealed with JOY when I realized I'd been sent an ask not about my writing, but about my VISUAL ART. My BFA was in painting and what I teach at university is connected to the creation of visual art. So I just get SO happy to think someone else cares about my stuff enough to ask how I make it! Please don't ever be sorry or shy to reach out! <3

Aside doing an actual video (which I could try, one of these days, if you want, but I'm trad only so it'll be clunky lol), here are some thoughts that pop into my sleep-deprived brain:

--It's FINE to use a reference. In order to master line variation and, especially form and movement, you will want NOT to let tracing be a crutch. But unless you have plans to be a sequential artist who has to have a mental "shorthand" of how-to's with various features and body parts, it is ENTIRELY ok to use a live or photographed model. Whoever started the rumor that this is cheating was being dumb.

--Become fluent in various softnesses (and therefore values) of graphite, Conte crayon, and charcoal. Yes, even if you're a computer artist. Learn the relationship between line thickness, perspective, and depth of form. I can go into this more if need be. Your H pencil is going to be hard and pale, and your B pencil is going to be soft and dark. Both have their uses.

--True to a bigger point: Just like in Doctor Who you don't skip Nine, don't skip trad art design fundamentals. You don't have to stay there forever, but let it be your foundational training. You don't have to go to university for this if you're unable. There are free online courses called MOOCs.

--Don't start stylized. Copying things like anime or comic book styles is a valid way to warm up, but you are filtering your work through someone else's eyes. Try to start with the original subject (be it a still like or a portrait) and develop your own unique mannerisms from that point.

--Don't be afraid to stop and toss it, and start over.

--Hardest one: Don't be afraid to erase and redo the part you love best if it doesn't have a correct relationship to the other parts in the drawing, painting, etc. I guarantee you can make something as good as that passage again. It's not gone forever. Don't be afraid to rework.

--Walk away for at least 3 hours and come back. Is it all still resolved or do you need to work on something?

--When choosing a color palette, it can be helpful to already have a neutral midtone established. Also, don't be me and get too ambitious about your colors. Pick like three tops and just do variations of those.

--Do NOT draw a human subject and think of the parts by their names WHILE rendering them. Reduce them to design principles: not "this is the eye," but "this is the dark round shape surrounded by a lighter space." If you think "this is the eye," you will stop really closely looking at what makes this eye unique and just kind of "plug in" stock eye features. This is the biggest enemy of capturing a likeness.

--You can absolutely rework anything in any medium. There are just different methods for doing so, between say watercolors and oils.

--Work with white noise or music. A playlist that keeps you in the zone, undistracted but also calm, is the playlist that you want.

--Know when to quit. 'I rarely feel like my work is "done" but if I keep going, I over work and ruin it.

I hope this helped as a start! <3 I'd love to see your work!

[twosidedcherrytrees]

Next zelda game hopes + kind of a rant on zelda's direction atm because it's 1am

TLDR: Zelda should bring back items you get in temples but kind of do it like how they did in A Link Between Worlds (sort of), like you can beat the temple with the item gotten there and you don't HAVE to use the items in the temples at all, but it makes it easier to get to chests or areas and stuff

I'm hoping the next zelda game's progression is kinda like a link between world's where you can really do the story in whatever order you want but there's still items you can get in each temple that help you solve puzzles in the rest of the world because I genuinely think that would fix a lot of the issues that botw/totk have

Like yeah you can complete the desert temple first with just the item you get in there (let's say hookshot) but look at this stuff that you'd need something that'd help you sink to the bottom of the water to get! Oh wow, the ice temple (i guess) gave you some iron boots? Hey, wasn't there something in the sand temple that had an extra puzzle that needed sinking? Hm, I should go back! It's an open world so it's not like I'm going to have to sit through 20 different loading screens like I would if it were an older zelda game!

And oh wow! Hey, look at this puzzle near death mountain! Looks like I'll need something that can show hidden passages for that, because brute-forcing it isn't really my style. Oh hey! The shadow temple gave me this lens of truth! I'll use that! Wow, look at how this game allows me to explore hyrule while still feeling like completing temples does anything to make me feel like I'm making my journey easier and less daunting!

Of course, the abilities given after each beast/temple do technically do that but I feel like they don't really do a lot outside of battle, and the sages are only used in a puzzle once.

And it's not even like this items would have to be necessary!! Keep the whole "you can solve puzzles how YOU want" aspect by making it possible to sink under water without iron boots, or navigate an invisible maze without the lens of truth! Because that's what going to happen with open world games! But at least do something to make it feel like zelda outside of calling it hyrule and giving us the master sword.

A lot of zelda's charm did in fact come from the silly little items you got to use. It came from the biggeron sword, and the skull hammer, and the sand rod, and the spinner. It came from all of the funny little musical instruments that you'd play to get secrets/non-mandatory content like the howling stones in Twilight Princess or the flute in Spirit Tracks.

BotW and TotK are both VERY impressive both graphics and loading wise, but at the same time they feel like an awkward teen phase as Nintendo tries to figure out how to work Zelda into open world, which is why even in my harshest critiques on the game I never say Zelda's bad now or anything like that. At the moment, it's just too little like previous zelda titles for it to feel truly like a zelda experience. It was an experience and I did enjoy the games, even through all of my complaints, but it didn't feel like zelda outside of models and name.

(By the way: to anyone who wants tell me that I just want nostalgia (a running theme I've noticed), I'd like to remind you that BotW/TotK had a lot of its world named after characters and places in past zelda titles, including actual areas and dialog referencing older games (OoT's castle Town on the great plateau, lon lon ranch ruins in hyule field, the forgotten temple, the chancellor from spirit tracks being referenced in a recipe book in hyrule castle's library, to name a few) and straight up items and outfits, in the base game (in TotK), refering to older titles. There's nothing wrong with this, but it feels a little silly to say I just want nostalgia under the current circumstances of how the games are)