#I just do this shit now. Who cares if no one can tell

[brbsoulnomming]

Heart On Your Sleeve Part 5

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

written for steddiebigbang2024 and belatedly posting here!

This part includes the Russian torture scene, so adding a warning for gore/violence just to be safe!

-----

Eddie comes by Scoops, once Steve gets the job there.

The first time, he laughs at the sailor hat for a minute straight until Steve rolls his eyes and calls back, “I'm taking my lunch!”

“Now?” Robin bitches. “Did you actually get a girl to fall for those ridiculous li-” She cuts off as she comes out of the back room and sees Eddie. “Oh. Huh.”

Eddie flashes a sharp toothed smile at her, and Steve rolls his eyes again and elbows him.

“I'll be back before the actual lunch rush hits this way,” he tells Robin, untying his apron and depositing it to the side of the counter.

To Eddie, he says, “Here, since this brought you so much joy,” and drops the sailor hat onto the top of Eddie's head.

Eddie gives a squawk and squirms around like he's trying to bat him off, though Steve notices he doesn't actually push him away as Steve adjusts the hat to his liking.

“There,” Steve says, shooting Eddie a teasing little grin as he steps back. “You keep that on the whole time, and I'll buy you lunch.”

“A small price to pay for a free meal,” Eddie says solemnly, but his eyes are crinkled a little like they do when he smiles, and he doesn't take the hat off the entire time they eat together.

—

He and Eddie sit out back behind Scoops, passing a cigarette back and forth. It's the end of Steve's shift, and technically he doesn't have to stay anymore, but he's not in a hurry to get home.

Dustin's away at camp, after all.

“Why the hell are you working here?” Eddie asks, sounding like he's been mulling it over for a while.

Steve snorts. “Needed to work somewhere.”

“Okay, fine, but haven't you done the lifeguard thing for like three years?”

Steve - didn't actually expect Eddie to know that, and he shoots him a little smile before he rolls his eyes. “Not a real job, according to my dad. It's just hanging out at the pool all day.”

Eddie scoffs. “Would your dad even know a real job if it bit him?”

“My dad's never really had to work for anything,” Steve mutters. “I didn't get into any of the colleges they wanted me to, so I needed to be taught a lesson. Pretty sure he was hoping it'd humiliate me.”

Eddie tips back, looking him over. “You don't look very humiliated.”

Steve shrugs. “Because I'm not. Yeah, sure, the outfit and the hat are stupid, but work is work. Ice cream makes people happy, I make people happy, it could be worse. Besides, he has no idea what I'm even making here. Every paycheck is a little more I can stash away where he can't touch it.”

Eddie's watching him very closely now, in a way that Steve's never seen before.

“How long have you been doing that?” he asks quietly.

“What, saving money that my dad doesn't know about?” Steve asks.

“Yeah.”

Eddie's face is serious - far more serious than Steve's ever seen him, than he thinks the situation warrants. Steve frowns.

“Since I got my first job, I guess? Anything I ask for from him comes with some kind of string attached, and I got tired of paying for it.”

Eddie's quiet again. “You've gotten in a lot of fights the last couple of years,” he says, slow and careful like he thinks Steve might bolt. “Lot of bruises.”

He clocks on to what Eddie's trying to get at, then, and a rush of relief washes over him as he hurries to set him straight. “Oh, no, my dad's not abusive or anything, just an asshole. He's never hit me.”

Eddie considers that. “Your dad can be an abusive piece of shit without ever hitting you.”

Steve licks his lips, takes his turn watching Eddie a little more closely. “Sounds like you're familiar with it.”

Eddie laughs, sharp and humorless. “Come on, man, you know who my dad is.”

“I know what people say about him,” Steve agrees. “But I've learned not to listen to rumors.”

Eddie flicks the cigarette butt off into the distance.

Steve gets out another one, puts it between his lips to light it. He takes a long drag, then - pulls his heart out of his chest, setting it between them before he passes the cigarette over.

Eddie's eyes drop down to his heart as he takes the cigarette, but this time he doesn't say anything.

Steve still doesn't ask to see his, even though he's tempted.

“You can listen to these ones,” Eddie says after a while. “They're mostly true.”

“You deserve better,” Steve tells him.

He looks over when Eddie doesn't say anything, finding him watching his heart. It's beating strong and steady.

“So do you,” Eddie says without looking up.

They sit in silence for a while longer, until the cigarette is gone.

Then Steve tucks his heart back into his chest and stands up. “Come on, I'll get us lunch.”

Eddie scowls at him. “You bought last time.”

“Yeah, but a conversation like that deserves a burrito bigger than your head, and I've got employee discount,” Steve counters, holding out his hand.

Eddie concedes, accepting his hand up.

—

Steve keeps making up excuses to buy Eddie lunch after that, every time he comes by at the end of an early shift or close to his lunch break on a later shift.

One day he gets them both pizza from Sbarro, and they sit at one of the sticky plastic tables in the food court. It's so small their knees knock together as they devour their slices, but -

But it also means that Steve can tuck his ankle up against Eddie's, hook his foot half around it, and have an excuse if he needs one.

He doesn't need one.

Eddie doesn't move his foot away, but he does shoot wide eyed little looks over at Steve like he's not sure whether this is a joke or not, and -

“Hi,” Steve says, soft and ridiculous and holy shit, he has to have something better than hi.

But apparently hi works, because Eddie ducks his head, looks back up at him with something soft and wary and surprised all at once.

“Hi,” Eddie says back.

And that's -

It's something.

—

Steve gets closer to Robin - their bickering has started to become playful, and even though her teasing's never been mean, now it sounds almost fond. She still gets annoyed when customers watch them work in complete sync and think they're a couple, but now she just rolls her eyes and complains to him later instead of throwing things off by trying to protest it.

It's nice. He thinks he might be winning her over, and it makes the days pass a lot quicker.

—

He doesn't see Eddie for a week after their pizza lunch.

He tries not to think much about it, just tells himself that if he hasn't seen him by the time Dustin comes back from camp, he'll call him.

—

This isn't like any beating he's taken before.

Steve'd thought he was prepared. He was prepared, at least in the beginning. Billy did just as much damage, even if it was in a shorter span of time, and the ache in his ribs and stomach and face is familiar.

He can handle it.

Besides, it doesn't matter how much they hurt him - protecting Robin and Dustin and Erica is more important than anything else.

"Let's take a look at his heart," one of the soldiers says. "See how honest he's really being."

Steve's pretty sure he makes a choked off little guh.

He doesn't want to let them anywhere near his heart.

But on the other hand - he isn't lying as much as they think he is, and maybe that will prove it? They'll have to undo his hands to get him to take it out, and he briefly considers trying to get the drop on them, but he has to concede that probably won't go very well for him.

It's not like they're really asking for his opinion, anyway.

They aren't making any move to untie his hands, either, and Steve's brow scrunches in confusion.

He sees one of them holding what looks like a mix of a gun and a taser. It - honestly, it looks pretty stupid, like a prop in a bad movie, and he wrinkles his nose at it.

They press it up against his ribcage, pull the trigger - and fuck, he jolts back with the force of it.

His chest splits open.

The shock of it makes him numb for a precious few moments, staring down at the gaping hole in his own chest. The pain doesn't hit him until they take his heart out. It feels like it's being carved out of him, ripped from his chest as though he were being mauled by a wild animal, and he has the somewhat hysterical thought that he shouldn't be alive for this.

His heart was torn out of his chest, and somehow it's still beating, erratic and racing.

"Hmm," one of the soldiers says, tilting his heart this way and that. "Feels real."

The soldier squeezes it, and this time Steve screams at the pressure tightening around his heart, making him convulse in his bonds.

The second soldier laughs.

"They're making such good fakes these days," the second soldier says.

The first soldier relaxes his grip, and Steve sucks in ragged gulps of air, too disoriented to really understand what they're saying.

"Much more sophisticated than patches and paint," the first soldier agrees. "What good would a spy be if he showed his real heart?"

"No," Steve protests. "It's real, come on, you can feel it."

There’s no sign of deception from his heart, but it's beating too wildly from the pain to really make a difference.

"We'll see about that," the second soldier says, handing a switchblade to the first.

The first soldier presses the flat of the blade against his heart. "Let's see what's underneath if we shave a little off?"

—

Steve doesn't really remember anything after that. He must have passed out, because the next thing he hears is Robin's voice, and he realizes he's in a different room, tied back to back with her.

His chest aches.

Everything aches, really, but his chest is the worst of it.

Steve looks down, sees himself solid and in one piece again. He might have thought the whole thing was just a pain induced hallucination if it weren't for the unstable beat of his heart. It's pulsing unsteadily, and he feels as though if he even breathes too hard, it might burst into pieces with the next beat.

But he's not alone now.

He's with Robin, and she makes everything better, and even though his heart beats too fast when he thinks of how much he likes her - it's the good kind of too fast, not the kind that makes him think his heart is going to explode.

He is pretty sure that his heart is going to explode, though, that they're probably going to die here. He knows Robin is thinking the same thing - he just knows, like going through Russian secret agent torture together has made them automatically on the same wave length.

They were heading towards being friends before this, he knows, wonders if maybe they could have ever been for real.

It's a shame he doesn't think he'll ever get to find out.

—

Dustin and Erica find them before Steve loses any fingers.

Which is good. He might not be on the basketball team anymore, but he still plays with Lucas sometimes, and he likes all of his fingers attached to his hand and not on the floor of a secret Russian base.

He tells Dustin that as they're escaping from said Russian secret base. Dustin looks a little pale, hugs him tight around the middle, which makes Steve laugh - it should hurt, he thinks, but he doesn't feel a thing.

The only thing he feels is kind of floaty, and the itchy, overheated sensation he always gets when he's had his heart locked inside his chest for too long.

When no one's looking, Steve takes his heart out of his chest.

His stomach turns.

Whatever he's feeling about it seems distant, too far removed for him to be able to react to it, but the physical sensation of his stomach heaving is present and accounted for.

It only barely looks like a heart. The shape of it is hardly visible, more like a double handful of the precut chuck roast he gets to use as stew meat, sluggishly oozing every time it beats.

The thought of putting it back in his chest makes his stomach heave again, but even like this, he knows he can't keep it out in the open.

He rips off the red scarf from his Scoops uniform, wraps it around his heart to hold it together, and ties it off.

There.

Now no one will notice.

This is already written, and my plan is to post one part a day until it's all up here!

-----

Part 6

Taglist (always happy to add more to this if anyone wants): @fairytalesreality @lostonceandneverfound @wheneverfeasible @awkwardgravity1 @theintrovertedintrovert @thewickedkat @ravenfrog @scarlet-malfoy @missmagillicuddy @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @ollyxar @cringe-culture-is-dead-99 @thedragonsaunt @makewavesandwar @ajeff855 @mae-liz @the-fantastical-asexual @jettestar @warlordess @samsoble @persnicketysquares @cryptid-system @my-love-of-books @mydysfunctionallife @dreamercec @holyangelstudentuniverse

[stevieschrodinger]

"No." Chrissy crosses her arms over her chest.

Eddie flops onto the bed dramatically, fucks it up, and slides onto the floor.

"But what about-"

"No."

"Chrissy-"

"No. This is it. This is your last chance. No fucking about, no forgiveness, no come back, you get that, right?"

"Yeah but they said that every other-"

"The label is ready to drop you."

"What?" Eddie screeches and climbs up off the floor. He's shirtless and sweaty, his hair half sicking up half sticking to his sweat. "They can't do that."

"They can. They will. The lawyers are already involved, Gareth's ready to walk away."

Eddie feels like he's just been slapped. Punched. Like he fell maybe, like that moment when you're nearly asleep but your body jolts you awake, a half remembered dream that you just tripped and went head first off the stage. "You're lying-" Chrissy doesn't lie, "Gareth. The guys, none of them would-" but he sees it now, sees it through unfortunately sober eyes. See's it in the look on Chrissy's face. Can look back at the half remembered drugged up haze of all the shit Eddie's gotten up to over the last two years. All the times he didn't show. All the times he pulled bullshit. All the times he staggered into practice, late and drunk. All the times he turned up high. All the times his therapist has made him talk through his mistakes, to own them, to be truthful with himself about his problems.

Eddie can't have a drink. He can't smoke anything or inject anything or shove anything up his nose. He has to deal with it. He has to see it. There's a mirror next to Chrissy, big and ornate, and overdone, just like everything else in the room. Drug addict Eddie decorated this room, black and red and gilt. Arrogant vampire chic. Eddie thought it was cool. Four months of rehab and therapy and he's come back to a bedroom he fucking hates. The godamn carpet is black; who even buys black carpet? The top of the dresser is a mirror; easier for the coke.

Eddie should have torn it all out already.

He stares at himself in the mirror. He doesn't even remember getting some of the tattoos he has. He's too thin, bony, sick looking. His skin is flush pink with rut and there's a wet patch where the head of his cock hangs heavy. Chrissy does not give a shit.

"Eddie, honey. They all would. They all will. This is what I've been telling you. They are done. One more slip, and that's it. Rehab said absolutely no emotional entanglements while you're vulnerable-"

"I am not fucking vulnerable-"

"Nothing at all that could undermine your progress. No Omega's Eddie, I mean it. No drugs. No rut suppressors, no hormones, no nothing. Eddie I have been through this place with a fine tooth comb, I swear to god there's not so much as a Tylenol in this whole building."

"But what if I get a headache?" Eddie asks, suddenly feeling pathetic and weak as a kitten.

"Steve will get you an ice pack."

Eddie blinks, "who the fuck is Steve?"

"He's here to help you through your rut-"

"You said no Omega-"

"He isn't. He's a Beta, and he's the best there is at this. He will feed you, he will nest with you, anything you need, he will get it for you, he will look after you, he will let you scent him until your rut is done-"

"But-"

"Beta scent is calming!" Chrissy talks over Eddie, "this is not a sex thing, you need to rub one out do not do it in front of Steve. Do not piss him off, do not push his boundaries, am I clear? The center highly recommended him for this, okay?"

Eddie rankles with irritation, with displeasure.

Chrissy's nose crinkles at the scent, "look, I chose Steve to reduce the risk okay, male Beta is about the safest person you can be with right now. You have been clean for nearly five months Eddie, please. I am begging you, not for me, for you, you will hate yourself for the rest of your life if you fuck this up again. And actually also for me because watching them rush you into intensive care I-" She stops, looks at the floor, "for me Eddie- I cannot watch you go through something like that again, okay? I am asking you as your friend, please."

The OD was stupid; but Eddie had it in his head he was immortal at the time. "Okay Chris. Okay."

"Good. Thank you. I...won't hug you right now though."

Eddie looks down at the tent he's pitching in his sweats, "that's fair."

Chrissy opens the bedroom door and leaves, there's a man standing there. Eddie's preference isn't men, and Chrissy knows that. Hell, Eddie would take an Alpha over a Beta, and Chrissy knows that too.

Eddie takes a deep breath. The voice of his therapist mutters something about judging people by their desirability. They've talked a lot about Eddie judging people; can this person provide drink, drugs, or a fuck? No? Then what's the point of them.

It's a hard thing to change, when that's been your worldview for years. Even so, Eddie cannot see the point of this man; so he shuts the door in his face.

[sugarushwriting]

cherry popper —

sunghoon x reader

getting your cherry popped by your enemy

mature content featured, read at your own discretion

note: i know i know i said a writing schedule but this is my issue — i just want you all to read what i have planned so bad! i’ll start the schedule soon, ignore my last updated post

“you are infuriating!” you screeched, stomping your foot to the ground like a child.

“no, you are!”

“for goodness sake, you both are infuriating!” your professor interrupted your arguing with park sunghoon.

your worst enemy since middle school. now both ready to graduate university soon, nothing has changed.

you and sunghoon turned to your professor with looks of disgust towards one another. your professor has had you both in her classes for 3 semesters as you both shared a major.

“i’ve dealt with you two for too long! always arguing before, after, and during my lectures! you two can’t even stop bickering long enough to enjoy this nice class trip!” the professor rambled.

“professor, i really was trying to enjoy this trip—,” the professor cut you off

“no you haven’t! any given moment you started an argument with mr. park, knowing he will argue back. you two leave me no choice, you are to stay here in your rooms at the hotel, my assistant will be staying on the floor if you two need anything. he’ll most likely try to find a bonding exercise for you two.”

“if we stay here, that means we miss the exhibits!” sunghoon exclaimed, dark bushy eyebrows furrowed in confusion, hurt, and anger towards you.

the professor shrugged. “hopefully it’ll teach you a lesson like i teach my children.” she scolded, waving her finger at both of you.

you and sunghoon stood in the hallway of the hotel dumbfounded that you would be missing the exhibit you both were so excited to view. three months you’ve been waiting for this trip!

you groaned in annoyance, “you just have to ruin everything, huh?”

sunghoon turned to you wide eyed, “me? you’re the one always starting shit between us two!”

“you could just ignore me.” you shrugged trying to place the blame all on him.

“ignore you? i’ve tried, and you never let it go. you keep pestering like an annoying little bug until i reply to you.”

your lip turned up, “listen here you little—,”

“finish that sentence and i’ll ask the hotel to make you clean toilets.” your professors graduate assistant snapped.

you and sunghoon turned around to face the young guy who couldn’t be more than 3 years older than you.

“faked being ill because my girlfriend happened to come down to the city to see me. haven’t seen her in four months as we live apart,” the assistant began explaining, “but now i have to babysit two annoying little young adults who can’t get along for nothing!”

“man, you don’t have to babysit us. we can care for ourselves.” sunghoon stated.

“and risk you two sneaking off?” the assistant shook his head.

you crossed your arms, “so what do you want us to do?”

“the hotel is low on staff in the kitchen. they just need help with dishwashing and putting together cutlery.”

“no way! i don’t want my fingers to turn into raisins!”

“that’s why gloves were invented, cherry.”

you narrowed your eyes, ready to stab sunghoon if you could, especially at the nickname he’s given you for the past year.

“you two, kitchen, now. you can go to your separate rooms afterwards. don’t snitch on me, help the kitchen out, and i’ll tell the professor you two got along well enough to be able to join in on the activities tomorrow.”

“deal.” both you and sunghoon agreed.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

it was all going well—decently well for you and sunghoon until you dropped a plate in the sink, causing the water to splash both you and him.

he splashed water back, so now you and him were banned from dishwashing and instead wrapping cutlery for future hotel guests.

about an hour later, you both were only half way done through the giant bucket of clean dishes.

“this is exhausting!” you sighed. “my neck is starting to hurt.”

“stop whining and just keep going.” sunghoon replied quietly.

“what’s got your panties in a twist?”

sunghoon dropped the fork and spoon he was holding. “mhm, i don’t know, maybe you? always starting arguments with me.”

“you’re the one who started it, park sunghoon.”

“when did i ever start? you are the one who started it back in middle school.”

“middle school? sunghoon, i never even talked to you in middle school until that day you said my hair bow was ugly.” you reminded him.

that’s when sunghoon became your enemy. maybe for a stupid reason, but as a young girl, you had tried a new hair style with a hair bow after your mom made you get a hair cut, that the salon butchered.

you were insecure about it for a while, but it only really unsettled you when sunghoon came up to you one day during lunch telling you that your ‘hair bow was ugly, and nothing can make your hair look pretty again.’

since then, you’ve always sought out to ruin park sunghoon. whether it was getting better grades, to become top of the class. becoming class president so he’d be class vice president.

or even childish things like a whoopie cushion, taking a picture of him picking his nose in private, and even starting arguments over small things.

but the biggest would have to be when you started dating his friend second to last year in high school, you two only ending the relationship a little over a year ago.

kang taehyun.

it was a sneaky move to date your enemy’s friend. but it worked in your favor as just your presence annoyed sunghoon. he started to dislike you even more then.

but it wasn’t like sunghoon and taehyun were best friends, they just happened to be in the same friend group.

sunghoon remembered the day he called your hair bow ugly. he actually didn’t think it was ugly, but he was upset about what he overheard you and your friends at the time saying about him.

then when sunghoon found out you were actually dating taehyun, he couldn’t believe it. he would tease you and only bring it up to taehyun the reasoning for you to date his friend was to annoy him.

sunghoon used to hate seeing you around all the time when he just wanted to be with his friends. he especially disliked whenever taehyun would be too handsy with you.

“i only called your hair bow ugly because you and your friends made fun of me.” sunghoon sighed deeply. his lips went into a thin straight line as he went back to his deep thinking, focused on wrapping the silverware.

you looked at him surprised and confused. “sunghoon, when did my friends and i ever make fun of you?”

sunghoon sighed once more, wanting to forget the whole incident, but knew now was probably a good, but very late time to confront you about it.

“i overheard you all laughing at the fact i was a figure skater at the time, and said something about me being feminine.”

you stood there, too much in shock. your brain racked old memories and conversations, trying to remember that exact time. as you stood and stared, sunghoon continue on with the kitchen chore.

then it hit you, and you slightly chuckled. “sunghoon, we weren’t laughing at you. we were admiring you. the fact you was a boy doing figure skating? we were so impressed! and the feminine thing was a compliment, i promise! i swear as young girls we were jealous because you had a nice body we were jealous of at the time.”

sunghoon snapped his head toward you, observing you for any chance of a lie. he saw none as you stood there and smirked.

“you really called my hair bow ugly, to upset me, because you misheard my conversation with my friends?”

sunghoon scoffed, “well i mean, as a young boy, it was hard enough being a figure skater. i was just, don’t know, very introverted and shy.”

which he still was most times.

“you aren’t introverted or shy around me, sunghoon.”

“because i can’t be. you drive me up the wall on my nerves.”

you laughed. sunghoon liked the sound. he always did.

then he asked, “did i really hurt your feelings by saying your bow was ugly?”

you nodded. “yes you did. that started a war.”

“a war between us that i think we can now end?”

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

after another hour, you all were close to finished when the kitchen staff let you go. rubbing your neck, you complained, excited to shower and just lay around for the rest of the night.

it was only 6 in the evening, and the exhibit went on until 9 pm, and you both were sure the professor and classmates would be off doing their own thing for the rest of the night as curfew wasn’t until 1 am.

“wanna watch a movie?” sunghoon asked, startling you. “i mean, there’s nothing else going on for us, and we could, maybe, keep each other entertained?”

you shrugged. “sure. just let me shower first. my room or yours?”

“mine. my friend and roommate, heeseung, snuck in some beer.”

you smiled. “perfect.”

half an hour later, you both were showered, in comfy clothes, and in sunghoon’s hotel room, sitting on the couch at the end of the beds watching a movie.

two drinks in, sunghoon was feeling bold. “why did you date taehyun?”

being caught off guard, you slowly turned your head, then tilted. “uh, why?”

“did you only date him because of me? to make me mad or jealous?”

“more to make you mad.” you teased with a wink.

“well congrats, you made me both mad and jealous by dating my friend.” sunghoon snickered, sipping his bottle of beer. he was no where near drunk or even tipsy. just a bit of extra courage running through his veins.

it was him watching you out of the side of his eye that got him this way. your laugh, your smile, the smell of you, so intoxicating.

you were more shocked and confused than ever. “sunghoon, what?”

sunghoon leaned down to look at your face, “taehyun used to bitch and moan that he could never get in your pants. that you would tease him, only willing to dry hump with him.”

you swallowed but rolled your eyes as well. taehyun always did complain that you never let him have sex with you. it never really bothered you.

taehyun knew you were a virgin. what he didn’t know was that whenever you thought about finally being intimate with him, all you thought about what sunghoon. all you could see was sunghoon. your thoughts were consumed of sunghoon whenever you thought anything sexual.

“why wouldn’t you have sex with your boyfriend, cherry?”

“why do you call me cherry?”

“answer me first.” sunghoon placed the bottle on the floor bedside him so he could turn his body to face you once more.

“uh, well i just didn’t want to have sex with him.” you shrugged one shoulder.

“why not?”

“eh eh, i answered you, your turn.” you tsked.

sunghoon bit his lower lip, staring at your lips as he replied, “because of that cherry lip gloss you always wear.”

you were wearing it now. not only did it look good against your skin, it tasted good too, whenever you got your nervous antics and chewed on your lip.

sunghoon always observed you putting that cherry lip gloss on your lips. it started with the cherry chapstick in high school, but just a little over a year ago you started wearing the cherry lip gloss.

“now answer me.” sunghoon demanded.

you took in a deep breath wondering how much or little to tell him. “well,”

“—was it because he wasn’t me?” sunghoon interrupted, your eyes going wide.

“sunghoon, no, what would give you that idea?”

“he told me he heard you calling out another guy’s name while playing with a toy of yours. he looked at me with anger and disbelief as if i had something to do with it.”

your eyes still wide, mouth shaped into an ‘o.’ you laughed nervously waving sunghoon off, “ah, he probably misheard me, that’s all.”

“i don’t believe you cherry.” sunghoon stated, standing up from the couch only to stand directly in front of you. eye level now with his crotch, you looked at him with innocent and confused eyes.

“sunghoon—,”

sunghoon stopped you mid sentence just by his thumbs hooking to the hem of his sweats, only pulling them down a little, teasing to pull out his cock.

“have you only kissed and dry humped him? what else have you done with him while thinking of me?” sunghoon clicked his tongue.

you shook your head. “sunghoon you’re mistaken!”

“sucked taehyun’s dick while thinking of me? mhm, even dry hump him thinking and wishing it was my lap you were rocking against?”

each sentence, sunghoon leaned in closer, mouth inches from yours. he could smell the cherry lip gloss of yours. excited to taste it finally.

you closed your eyes because—it was the truth. all of it. you blurted, “i never had sex with him because i’m a virgin!”

sunghoon chuckled, raising to his full height again. with a smirk, “mhm so my cherry was waiting to get her cherry popped by her enemy.”

you tightened your legs closer together for friction, but also to prevent yourself from becoming any wetter at just his words.

your movement didn’t go unnoticed from sunghoon. he got down on his knees in front of you. “has my cherry thought about getting ate out from her enemy? have you imagined it was me instead of taehyun going down on you?”

you shook your head, wanting to not believe this was happening. it wasn’t until you felt sunghoon’s teeth bite your thigh through your own bottoms, you snapped your eyes open.

“what was that for!”

sunghoon laughed, “be honest baby.” then, you nodded. “guess i’ll have to make your imagination become reality, huh?”

quick and easy, he got your bottoms off of your legs, and used his thumb to tease your clit through your underwear. a wet spot already beginning to form.

sunghoon’s eyes sparkled with neediness and excitement. he got up from his knees, you internally protesting, until his lips captures yours into a searing kiss.

he whispered against your lips, “so tasty, cherry,” as he continued to intensely work his lips against yours, loving the cherry lip gloss against his own lips.

he soon fell back to his knees, kissing up your right thigh before he moved your underwear to the side, poking his index finger to your cunt. he was met with tightness and some resistance, but only because it was a new feeling, new fingers for you. long, fingers to be exact.

sunghoon poked his index finger in your hole, followed by his middle finger, your legs opening wider for him, head rolling to the back of the couch with a groan. your hands gripped the couch, fingers digging into the cushions.

sunghoon then added a third finger, his ring finger, and your right leg went to hook over his shoulder, him holding your left wide open for him.

it was so much you wanted to snap your legs closed. sunghoon rocked his fingers in and out a few times, until your wetness covered his fingers, and he pulled out, quickly undressing you of your underwear. but just as quickly as his fingers were gone, it was replaced with his tongue and lips.

“sung—hoon!” you sang into a moan, left hand gripping his locks.

he moaned into your cunt, lapping up the juices you had to offer to him, occasionally using his k-9 teeth to nibble on your folds and clit. when his lips found home onto your clit, using his tongue to swirl, teeth to nibble, three of his fingers entered back into your cunt, no warning or teasing. he began rocking his fingers in and out in a medium pace, his tongue flicking your bud.

your chest and stomach began to tighten, your eyes rolling to the back of your head, head rolling onto the back of the couch from left to right. he removed his lips, fingers still, only to spit on your cunt, and got right back to work as if he didn’t pause to begin with.

this orgasm was about to be intense. taehyun never gave you mind blowing head like this. he was always decent, though. but sunghoon’s tongue was magic and had you coming way too soon.

“hoon!” you moaned loudly, hoping no one outside the door could hear you. “i’m—hoon, i—come—my goodness!” you babbled.

sunghoon used only his tongue while you came down from your first orgasm of the night.

your body jerked from the overstimulation, you pushing sunghoon’s head away.

“taste so good, cherry. better than i imagined.” he whispered once again, against your lips, before kissing you, his tongue poking through to find yours.

while kissing him, sunghoon grabbed you by your thighs so he picked you up and held you, turning around so he sat on the couch with you straddling him.

your wetness immediately started to stain his sweats, but he didn’t care. “hump me, cherry.”

“like this?” you asked. he wanted you to hump him? you bare below, him with his sweats?

you squealed when a palm of his came down to your bare ass. “it wasn’t an option, cherry.”

you nodded, biting your lip, as you began to rock your hips back and forth and in circles around his cock which was imprinting through his sweats. your cunt could feel the outline of him, getting wetter with each movement.

soon, you were on your way to your second orgasm. sunghoon’s hands gripped your waist, guiding your movements as you became more sloppy, only worried about reaching your second orgasm.

“that’s it cherry, use me like you’ve always wanted.” fuck sunghoon’s words were not (but was) helping.

your hands gripped his shoulders, trying to steady yourself as your movements increased as your orgasm was approaching.

your thighs started to become wet from your own juices, a big spot covering sungoon’s outline.

sunghoon pulled you closer as you came, he began sucking and kissing your neck, sending you over the edge even more.

your movements slowed down, as his hands stayed glued to your hips. your breathing became heavy against his collarbone, you giving it a peck, leaving a lip mark.

you’ve had two orgasms, sunghoon none. you leaned back to look sunghoon in the eyes. “what about you coming?”

sunghoon’s lips perked up, “cherry, i’ll come, don’t you worry.”

sunghoon from underneath, pulled down his sweat pants, your thighs and cunt somewhat hovering over him. you felt his tip brush against your folds, your body shivering with excitement.

you only hoped your toys prepared you enough for this moment. sunghoon pushed his sweats off as far as he could, down to his ankles. his shirt came off next, along with yours, leaving you both completely naked.

“cherry, i hope you used a dildo big enough.” he stated as he pulled a condom out from between the couch cushions. you were to entranced to even comment on that.

you bit your lip, “i hope so too, hoon.” you sighed against his lips, kissing him, as he helped you ease down on his hard cock after he put on the condom.

you bit down on his lip when he fully pushed you down on his length, a loud moan coming from you both.

“fuck, so tight cherry.” sunghoon groaned, head leaning back against the couch. “those toys did nothing to prepare you for me.”

you stayed still, both in a comfortable position. “i’m scared to move.”

“just go slow, okay?” sunghoon’s fingertips ran up and down your spine to comfort you. with a sigh of pleasure, you lifted your hips to the tip only, to slowly push back down.

you were sure you felt him in your stomach. slowly, you kept a rhythm of up and down on his length, occasionally rocking your clit forward for friction.

soon your thighs were starting to tense and become tired. “hoon, can—can you take over please?” you sighed against his cheek, nose resting in his neck.

without even removing himself from in you, sunghoon stood up from the couch, your wetness dripping in between the both of you. he carried you over to his bed, your legs wrapped around him.

he laid you on the bed, again, never slipping from inside you. his hand found one of your hips, the other resting against your cheek.

“let me know if it’s too much.” sunghoon stated before he pulled out completely only to push back with such force, your cunt squelched, your eyes shutting, a loud moan leaving your lips.

“fuck! sunghoon!”

you wasn’t expecting that. but honestly, you wasn’t expecting or even wanting him to be gentle.

for the next however long, which felt like hours, sunghoon rutted his cock in and out of your cunt with ease, your wetness spilling out on your thighs and his.

his thumb came down to your clit, rubbing left, right, up, and down, stimulating you just right to bring you to your third orgasm of the night.

“that’s it cherry, baby come on my cock. come on your first cock. fuck!” sunghoon moaned. “such a dirty slut thinking about your enemy while with that ex of yours.”

“hoon—sorry,” you apologized for no reason at all. why was you apologizing?

“wanted me to be the one to pop your cherry? got your wish.” sunghoon sighed, his pace of thrusts speeding up and becoming sloppy as he was chasing his first orgasm. “fucking whore thinking of me while playing with your toys. imagining it was me eating you out. kissing you. all while with—,”

with a loud, explosive moan, you cut sunghoon off as you came for the third time. no squirting involved, but you did have so much wetness dripping out of you, anyone could be mistaken.

sunghoon released into the condom with a low, throaty, growl-like moan, collapsing on top of you before rolling off.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

sometime in the middle of the night, you heard hush whispers. you didn’t move an inch, only somewhat, subconsciously listening.

“sorry man, i can ask her to leave?”

“absolutely not! i’ll go bunk with her roommate for this trip. once i tell her why i need somewhere to sleep she will be more than thrilled.”

it was heeseung, coming in after 3 am. once he saw you and sunghoon in the same bed, he didn’t even ask questions, only smiled.

about damn time you two fucked the anger out of one another.

sunghoon crawled back in bed next to you, your body only covered by a shirt of his. sunghoon stared at your sleeping figure with a smile.

you were finally his.

[dear-ao3]

vegas part 2: still december 1st. still at it. yes i know its late. i do not care. lets fucking go

and so. what we’ve all been waiting for. the race. self described as james hinchcliffe as having “cold temperatures, [a] dirty race track, low downforce configurations and walls everywhere.” 

franco was cleared to race. though there was some controversy over it because there was an article that came out with a quote from franco about the crash where he claimed to have a concussion. however, i would like to point out that the article in question is translated from spanish and things Could have gotten Lost in Translation (also to my knowledge it wasn't a very reliable news source).  

in any case. people were annoyed about the fact that franco Could have been racing with a concussion and yeah williams has been a little bonkers this year but driver safety is something that Should be taken seriously. 

this wouldnt be the first time that a driver raced with a concussion either. in 2021 after silverstone max had a 50g crash with lewis and admitted much after the fact to having vision problems at the next race because of it. though that was not caught because he didn't tell anyone about it. so. to my understanding. the concussion protocols that are in place only really can do anything if the driver tells someone about it. 

regardless he was there to race. as was george, who showed up in a pinstripe three piece suit

and so they lined up

russell

sainz

gasly

leclerc

verstappen

norris

tsunoda 

piastri

hulkenberg

hamilton 

ocon 

magnussen 

zhou

lawson

perez

alonso

albon

stroll

bottas

and colapinto started from the pitlane

“its very simple for max,” crofty reminded us as the lights started to go out. he just needs to finish above lando and in the points and basically “hes world champion again”

and charles (cause remember, he is max’s pawn according to lando) must have known this because on lap fucking one he managed to fully launch himself from fourth to second, somehow getting past both pierre and carlos.

meanwhile, liam lawson continued his tirade against old men by fighting now kevin magnussen. and nearly hit the wall doing so. “great man putting moves on him,” one of the announcers said. “we know how feisty he can be”

kevin though was not pleased with the move. “lawson was moving in a straight line when i was slipstreaming!” he said

and so you know. there were something insane like over 90 overtakes at last years vegas race. this year was expected to be about the same. 

so after lap 1, heres what we were working with:

russell

leclerc

sainz

gasly

verstappen

norris

tsunoda

piastri

hulkenberg

hamilton

ocon

zhou

lawson

alonso

magnussen

perez

albon

stroll

bottas

colapinto

george took the fastest lap on lap 3. which was good cause charles was only .4 behind him. and then charles took the fastest lap from george.

this was because while the mercedes was faster in the corners, the ferraris were faster on the straights. the mclarens were fast no where. and max was pootling along with his diy wing, managing to pass pierre for 4th on lap 4.

meanwhile oscar got noted for a false start.

george and charles had been battling ferociously for first but charles had to pull back to save his tires. so george was now 1.8 seconds in the lead, and he might have a plastic bag stuck on his car. 

charles pulled back so much that he got passed by his own teammate and was now down in third. he was not happy about that. he was actually told that carlos was going to try not to pass him, that was not the plan. but before he did (and i really think this radio was here? im not sure it might have been later) he told his team to “maybe try in spanish” telling carlos not to pass him.

then he got passed by max, which he really was not happy about. 

this was what he got for damaging his tires. unfortunately it was too early to bring him in, so he had to stay out and suffer.

lewis meanwhile had figured out that his car was Not Shit for once and slammed his foot on the accelerator. he managed to get all the way up past oscar. 

lando, still chasing his title dreams, passed pierre and was now fifth, though he was now back behind charles (max’s pawn) (max’s extremely angry pawn)

or at least he was until charles was called to pit on lap 10, as was lando

lewis passed yuki, he was now up to 7th

“as it stands, max verstappen will be champion at the end of the grand prix,” crofty told everyone, as max was currently sitting in third.

and it really wasn't looking good for mclaren as oscar got a 5 second penalty for a false start. 

and with all the pit stoppage that was happening around him, lewis had managed to work his way up to fourth.

and then max and carlos both pitted and he ended up in second, right behind george on lap 12

max came out of the pits in 12th, but crucially he was in front of both ferraris and lando

lando saw this and stepped on the accelerator, putting in a fastest lap. 

and george pitted, leaving lewis out in the lead. (george had been 15 seconds clear of lewis, so when he came back out he was in second)

“we’re in for a while heap of overtakes tonight,” crofty said excitedly as the race really started to take shape.

it was at this point that the shenanigans began ensuing. esteban was called in to pit, but absolutely no one was ready for him so he had to go back out and do a whole nother lap before coming back into the pits Again, which was bad news for his track position and also bad news for alpine cause that was a massive screw up.

and lance’s tires were also not ready when he came into the pits. at first this looked like an aston fuck up, but then after the race it was revealed that he had absolutely no radio for the entire race, so he was just kind of raw dogging it. as in, he had no one telling him at all when to come in to pit, so he made the calls himself. hence why he had no tires ready at all. so his pit was delayed.

and yuki drove over the speed limit sign at the end of the pit lane. 

lewis was called to pit on lap 14, and he came out 9th, behind lando. lewis was not happy about this. “what the hell man?” he said over the radio. “how many places have i just lost?” 

“we wouldve lost another five places if we hand hung it out any longer,” his engineer, bono, said. 

fortunately though, lewis was in a fast car. and he had fought to the front from 10th already once this race, he could certainly do it again. 

lap 15 saw pierre gasly screaming over his radio for more power

“low on power,” he said, normally.

“everything is looking okay to us,” came the pit wall response, entirely unbothered. 

“WAIT I HAVE NO POWER!” pierre screamed.

and then his car started smoking. 

fortunately he was close enough to the pits where he was able to pull in without triggering a safety car, but he was pissed. 

“oh man,” he said forlornly over the radio as he pulled in.

and then the cameras panned to a giant hole in the side of his car.

which he later posted on his instagram story

“you gotta feel for gasly,” the announcers said. “qualified third and didn't finish the race.” 

meanwhile, checo, who had somehow ended up second when no one was looking, let max though and now he was in second. then carlos passed checo.

and on lap 17 lewis passed lando, also taking the fastest lap.

and then charles passed checo, lewis passed checo, and lando passed checo, who was now way down in 7th. 

“the mercedes is flying,” martin brundle said. 

by lap 19 we had 

russell

verstappen

sainz

leclerc

hamilton

norris

tsunoda

piastri

albon

alonso

hulkenberg

zhou

lawson

perez

ocon

stroll

colapinto

magnussen 

and bottas

and no, your eyes do not decieve you! that is the williams of alex albon up into 9th! and the sauber of zhou guanyu in 12th! it was looking good for them!

and then ferrari began their return to their roots.

what roots are those? you might be asking. 

well lets take a look

“let me know asap if its going to go to plan c cause that changes everything,” carlos said over the radio on lap 19

“let me get back to you,” came the response from the pit wall. which was a classic ferrari “we are checking” moment (as crofty happily pointed out)

“norris is 4 placed behind max,” martin said. “he needs to be in front to keep the championship alive.” 

“that mclaren doesnt have the pace,” crofty said. and he was right. there was also some speculation that that could have something to do with the fact that they couldn't use their revoked rear wing with the special mini drs flap on it that had been declared illegal a few rounds ago. 

they called to the mclaren pit wall to ask zak brown his thoughts. and he said that they don't really have the pace at all. 

“you must be cheering for mercedes to take the big points away from ferrari,” martin said, because remember, ferrari are trying to take the constructors championship title from mclaren 

zak agreed that they were cheering for mercedes, and even went as far as to say “go lewis go!” 

but back to the race. 

carlos was told that ferrari were targeting plan a on lap 22 (which was speculated to be a one stop), george was 10 seconds ahead of max and mclaren was still suffering.

“the front right looks like its about to go any lap” lando said. and oscar could not get close to yuki to pass him.

“man these guys are fast on the straight,” lewis said about ferrari. martin pointed out that he was only three races away from being one of “those guys” and wondered if he was cheering for that in his cockpit. because remember he had expressed interest to quit mercedes early after the shit show that had been the brazilian gp. 

and, kind of insanely. toto had insinuated recently that he would have gotten rid of lewis even if lewis had not gone to ferrari because he had a “shelf life” that was coming to an end. but that comment seemed to have only motivated lewis more. 

he was certainly doing better than alex albon, who apparently had an overheating problem now. “can we just have one race without problems?” he said angrily over the radio.

“ted!” crofty said excitedly over the radio. “its almost time for your favorite part of a modern f1 grand prix! when sergio perez gets close to liam lawson!” 

and it indeed was. checo was in 12 and liam was in 13.

also in an exciting position was zhou guanyu, who was in 11th and only one spot behind alex albon. stake could get a point! their first point! and it was looking like an even better position to be in because alex albon’s engineer came over the radio on lap 26 to tell him:

“alex, weve got a terminal problem here, we need to retire the car.” 

and so the bad luck continued for williams. 

oscar pitted on lap 26.

carlos also wanted to pit on lap 26. “lets get off these tires,” he said over the radio, once again trying to be his own race engineer. 

but he did not pit. max pitted. 

“box me guys, box me,” carlos said again on lap 27. 

“carlos is trying to continue [his method of making his] his ferrari tacticians to do what he wants but they’re not” crofty said.

meanwhile max’s pit stop was called off, perhaps it was to trick another team into pitting. 

and still, carlos was not boxed. he was instead told to swap positions with charles, who had come up behind him. which was interesting because lewis was quite literally half a second behind charles. but they still swapped. and managed to keep lewis behind. 

carlos started to come into the pit lane. but then he backed out. not before he had already crossed the white line though, which usually means an instant penalty. 

lewis pitted. and max pitted. max also complained about carlos crossing the white line on the pit entry. 

crofty reported that there had been a very late call to “stay out stay out” from ferrari, in true ferrari fashion. 

“what happened?” carlos asked over the radio. 

“we were not ready,” said his engineer. 

“wake up you guys! c’mon!” carlos yelled back. he pitted on the next lap

“so where does this all shake out?” martin asked. 

well. we had one mercedes that was doing very, very well (george) and another that was putting pressure on max (lewis) 

george had apparently “even admitted he had an afternoon siesta” and he was leading by 15 seconds. 

and on lap 30 we had 

russell

leclerc

norris

verstappen

hamilton

sainz

hulkenberg

tsunoda

perez

zhou

ocon

lawson

piastri

alonso

magnussen 

bottas

colapinto

stroll

and, if you were wondering, lando was only ahead of max cause max had pitted.

esteban and liam apparently boinked eachother on lap 31, with esteban coming on the radio to say that he got hit.

and lando pitted as lewis took another fastest lap.

“lewis hoans in on the back of max, his arch rival,” martin said pretty dramatically. “anyone still angry about that? 2021?” im sure that across the world many people said yes (2021 of course was the year that max won the championship on the last few laps after a bs safety car call and effectively robbed lewis of his 8th world title).

matin said that he asks that question to fans all the time and fans always say theyre still mad about it. 

lewis then slammed the accelerator again and passed max on lap 32 for third, then got up to second as charles went into pit. 

you might be wondering why carlos hadnt gotten a penalty yet for crossing the white line on the pit lane. well out trusty commentators were wondering too. “ill be very surprised if we don't hear anything,” martin said. 

george pitted. it was a free pit stop because he had been 33 seconds ahead of lewis, so he still came out in first. 

“theyve got this race in the bag as it stands,” crofty said about mercedes. “but its a street track and theres several bags flying around. danger around every corner.” 

zhou meanwhile was barely holding onto 10th (and a point!) in front of esteban ocon

by lap 34 we had george still leading, followed by

hamilton

verstappen

sainz

leclerc

norris

hulkenberg

piastri

zhou

ocon

lawson

tsunoda

alonso

magnussen

perez

colapinto

bottas

stroll

“what a driver from lewis hamilton,” martin said. and it was. hed come up from 10th now twice.

“are we going to get a finish like spa?” crofty asked. then quickly amended that to be “as in lewis hunting down george” at the end, not george getting disqualified for being too light. 

there were 15 laps to go. lewis put in another fastest lap. and his gap to george was 9.1 seconds. 

and if rb could hold onto their current track position, they would be ahead of haas in the constructors championship, which was roughly 10 million dollars

lewis took fastest lap on lap 37. but then charles, who was also on a rampage, took it from him.

“give it 10 laps and he’ll be right on the gearbox of russell,” martin said. 

and there was still nothing in terms of penalties for carlos. 

“i don't know how ferrari have managed to argue this,” the announcers said. and karun even came on from race control to read the rulebook out loud, the exact section that said under which circumstances penalties should be given for crossing the white line of the pit box extry. 

and then checo pulled a move of all moves. crofty even branded it as “vintage sergio perez” as he managed to go right smack between liam lason and kevin magnussen, into a corner, and not a single one of them ended up in the wall as he did his double overtake on lap 39

lewis took the fastest lap again. and again it was taken by charles.

max was under pressure from carlos (who was 1.2 behind) and had no grip.

“you want me to try and keep them behind or what?” max asked his engineer, gp. cause remember, all max has to do is finish in front of lando and he wins the championship, something that he was currently doing. and even if both ferraris passed him, he would still be in front of lando.

“i think you should, yeah,” gp said passively and very confidently for someone who has, if you remember, a diy’d rear wing.

meanwhile checo passed ocon for 11th and lewis was now 7 seconds behind george. 

carlos passed max on lap 42. he was now in third.

martin wondered if carlos was going to try and keep max in his drs, like he did with lando in singapore 2023, to try and protect himself from charles, who was definitely faster than him. 

crofty said that carlos’s bosses wouldnt be pleased about that, especially since ferrari are actively trying to win the constructors championship, but his bosses were only his bosses for a few more races. 

charles was still trying to pass max on lap 45. he was still failing. 

then a little graphic popped up. if carlos had pitted earlier, when he had wanted to, simulation said that he could have finished second. martin found this very hard to believe. i guess we will never know for sure.

finally charles managed to pass max on lap 47. he was 1.5 seconds behind carlos.

and max was right in front of lando.

lando though was a ways back and boxed for softs to get a fastest lap. 

george was still leading. if he continued to lead and won, we would have 7 different multi race winners. which has never happened before. 

and if max stayed where he was he would win th championship. in vegas. like nelson piquet and keke rosberg in the 80s, who both also won their championship sby finishing in 5th.

and george won. 

and max came in fifth. 

so you know what that means. 

“FOUR TIME CHAMPION OF THE WORLD, MAX VERSTAPPEN!!!!”

“his driving and his ability has manhandled him to the win,” crofty said about max. cause remember, max didn't have the fastest car this year, it was not a dominating season like the last two gave been for him, he won with a diy rear wing for fucks sake!

THREE TIME RACE WINNER GEORGE RUSSELL

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george won, lewis came second. followed by carlos, charles, max, lando, oscar, nico, yuki, checo, fernando, kevin, guanyu, franco, lance, liam, esteban and valtteri.

george t posed on top of his car, then was so excited he jumped directly on top of the marshal holding the scale. 

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and then, because vegas is Quirky and Cool and Different, the drivers don't do the podium and the interviews right where they pull up at the end of the race. no they do on a different part of the track, by the fountains. 

so. how do they get there?

why, in a rolls royce of course!

and so lewis, george and carlos all hopped in one, and max and gp hopped in the other. 

gp was very, very proud of max

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max was more interested in exploring the rolls that they were in. 

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over in the other rolls, george had somehow wound up in the middle seat despite being 6’3, lewis was fixing his appearance in the mirror, and carlos was wearing a beanie

but they finally made it around, to the fountain where they were met with jenson button, who was absolutely slutting it up in a brown velvet blazer with a black turtleneck

and oh? what is this? “oh! jenson’s found a friend!” crofty said. 

and he had! jenson was joined by terry crews 

and unfortunately this is the part of my notes that i took entirely in the dark. so bear with me here. 

first, i was incredibly confused why terry was there, and then it became very obvious that he was just a massive fangirl trying to hold himself together, which was incredibly funny to watch.

still

george was incredibly happy with his race. “i cant even describe this [feeling?], dominant weekend.” and later he said he was waiting for something bad to happen, like a tree hitting the track, but it never happened. also later jenson called george’s race “perfect” he said he was cancelling his flight and going out drinking. which he did do. though he didn't have any other clothes with him so he had to go out in the pin stripe three piece suit that he showed up to the paddock

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 lewis was next and he started by congratulating max (which he had also done in the pit lane with the red bull crew) and then said that he “had fun coming from the back…best the car has ever felt!” and then speculated that maybe that was because it was cold. he definitely proved toto’s shelf life comments wrong (and damon hill agreed ) and even apparently out performed mercedes simulations of the race.  

(jenson later on comically slid over to try to talk to lewis like a dude in a romance movie. he and lewis were called "slagclaren" when they were both mclaren teammates there and theyre never beating the allegations) 

and carlos said that he had been “hoping vegas had something to offer me after last year.” with the man hole. he said he had actually been looking for every manhole cover while he was racing so he could avoid them  

and max. who they interviewed as a special treat because he had just become a 4x world champion. “its been a long season, but as a team we kept it together. to stand here as a four time world champion us something i never thought possible….this season taught me a lot of lessons that i am very proud of.” 

with this championship win, max becomes the second person to win his first four titles consecutively (the first was sebastian vettel, who also did it with red bull), though max did break sebs record of fewest days between first and fourth win by one day exactly, and only the sixth driver to ever win four or more world titles, joining the ranks of sebastian vettel, alain prost, juan manuel fangio, michael schumacher, lewis hamilton (the last two also both also won 4 consecutively, but not their first) 

and then he said that his fans got a bit spoiled last year with all the wins, and had to wait awhile this year. 

the podium was fun and filled with champagne and george doing his comical little hop hop and lewis and george holding the trophy like it was their newborn child for some reason.

and then soaking eachother in champagne

toto wolff even had good things to say about george and lewis, saying that george’s driving was from “another planet” and praised lewis for being able to get to p2 from p10.

lewis also gave some advice to younger drivers during the press conference that was very heart felt. the question posed to him was: Does your advice to young drivers about not being weighed down by the adverse criticism probably come from your feeling that you have been adversely criticized this year?

“It's not about this year. We're talking about youngsters, we're talking about eighteen year olds. And I remember when I was twenty two and you're thrown in the deep-end, you've been given training as a young driver through the younger series but you're not, most of them, probably don't have a PR person. The team will have a PR person but they're not looking out for you, they're looking out for the team. So, you're thrown in the deep-end and you're trying to be nice and people take advantage of you. So, my guidance, like, if I had a young driver and I was looking after him, I would put a lot of support around him so that people couldn't get to him. You know, the socials and media and stuff would not be able to affect that young individual's mindset. And I think that protecting that is really important 'cause then, you know, I think it's really about firstly them getting the opportunity and not knocking 'em down when they make mistakes. Which one of you or anyone here at eighteen years old-nineteen years old has not made mistakes? And when you do it in the spotlight it's really, really tough. And so we should be lifting these people up and giving them not just one chance, two chances, just continue to support them and just not slating them 'cause that's, it's just not nice.”

he also gave some advice for the rookies next year:

“...that I don't know! Don't do absolutely everything everyone tells you to do. Ask lots of questions. Take your time. Don't let the negativity get to you because people are so negative nowadays, judging you non-stop. So, stay off social media and keep your family and your closest friends close to you 'cause they are the only ones that are your true friends and know they are gonna be there for you when the going gets tough.”

also the vibes of this press conference were kinda funny. lewis had changed and was slaying, george was back in his puff jacket but over his race suit and carlos was still in his beanie

and when asked why george was in his puff jacket again, he said that no, he had not jumped into the fountain, he was just cold from getting soaked in champagne. and last year at vegas he said that he got pneumonia and had pneumonia from november to february and was not keen on getting a repeat of that.

but pretty much everyone had good things to say about max verstappen. including lando, who if you will remember, dragged max through the mud at the beginning of the weekend and was vaguely battling him in the championship for p1. he went up to him in the media pen and congratulated max on his win right away

and max was thankful for this, but he also told lando  : “I told you, many times, there will be a day. You’ll be world champion.”

lando then said “Let’s celebrate in Abu Dhabi.”

and max said “will do”

lando also called him a motherfucker in his congratuations comment on instagram

in his interviews, lando said that he was proud of how he has improved this season and has realized how much more pressure there is when you're driving to battle for the championship. he also said that he was trying to give himself grace for not winning. he also said that he would have changed the whole car this weekend, it was that bad. though he did say that it had pretty much nothing to do with the rear wing that they couldn't use anymore

other drivers also had good things to say about max. 

like franco: "its incredible what he has achieved, all the championships and races he's won. he's an incredible driver, in my opinion currently the best one in f1. he also did it with a car that wasn't the fastest…hopefully at some point we'll be able to beat him!"

and charles: "You know that he's not going to let any hundreths go and that whatever he can do to maximize the car he will do, I think like every other drivers but he's really on it every laps & you cannot really relax. But I like this challenge we've raced each other since a long time and I liked it."

george: "Max has done an amazing job and you know when he didn't have the car, he always got the best results possible & the guys he was fighting didn't. That's what makes him the champion!"

and esteban: “this year he has been the strongest out there and its been nice to watch”

max himself though was definitely enjoying his fourth championship. he said during his interview that he was “very thirsty” and then progressively started to get drunk. while in the paddock still. he started with the beer and said it was beer (after an interviewer asked if he was drinking dutch chocolate milk)

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at one point he was even double fisting gin and tonics

and i cant find my link but! he also made red bull vodkas for i think the sky sports team? which was unhinged of him. 

and also possibly explains several of his highly unhinged (but very welcome) comments. including but not limited to:

max bragging that he would have won the championship in other cars as well: "Would I have become champion in the McLaren? Yes! And much earlier too. In 2021 l would have also won the title in a different car [Mercedes]. In 2022 that would have been more difficult, because Ferrari was perhaps a bit too fragile then. And last year? Well, that would have been a bit more difficult."

max absolutely flaming the hell out of zak brown TO HIS FACE over the fact that zak said that max could only win in the fastest car: “Like you said, you know, before I can only win in the fastest car, this year has been a little bit different?”

and then several interviews and several drinks later he was asked if it was true that he had “run into zak brown and tell him you can become world champion not just in the fastest car?”

“yes! and i ABSOLUTELY told him that!” max said, while drinking gin and tonic “live on sky sports.” 

the red bull team were being pretty much equally as silly

i managed to lose the link somehow but one of the mechanics commented on a post about max being a 4x wdc that he knew they “didn't need that rear wing.”

and also, they did manage to remember to pack the max 4x wdc merch, but not the right rear wing

he also got very sappy about his childhood and what he would tell his younger self: 

"I wouldn't tell small Max anything because small Max was not worried about anything. Small Max was just loving life: driving quadbikes, go-karts, motocross bikes, having fun with his friends, not enjoying school. Honestly? That's the beautiful part of it. You shouldn't tell him anything and just let him live his life. I wish I could see myself with small Max. It was a good time."

he also got absolutely SOAKED with champagne

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and went and did an interview for a spanish news outlet saying that charles was going to be the next world champion.  

oh. speaking of charles. 

he was not having nearly as good a time as max was. or even george was. 

he was actually getting nearly possessed by american psycho.

and in case you cant hear him , this boils down to basically this:

bryan (race engineer) : "pick up please"

charles: "yes whatever you want. as always."

bryan: "you did your job"

charles: "yeah, yeah, I did my job, but being nice fucks me over all the fucking time, all the fucking time. it's not even being nice, it's just being respectful."

fred (team principal): "Charles. CHARLES." charles: "i know I need to shut up, but at one point it's always the same. oh my fucking god"

bryan: "ok but anyway you did the right thing for the team"

bryan: "and pick up please" charles "yeah yeah fucking pick up what the fuck you want"

charles: "the radio is on. sorry"

(and team red line, max’s e racing team, really tried their damndest to get charles his community service date with max for this with one of their members tweeting “community service coming for you after that teamradio”)

but what did happen here? 

well. this is not the first season that charles has done what ferrari tells him to do and then still manages to get screwed over. so this seemed to come from a place of frustration at the team more than anything else. he did have some other radios during the race that were angry, including “FUCKING STUPID” which i think was when carlos crossed the pit lane entry (which ne never did get a penalty for) and saying “NICE. AMAZING.” after being told they would swap cars (so charles would be ahead.)

he said in his post race interview that “But it's just frustrating when it's like this and it's been frustrating for me, but i can understand that nobody understands that.”

he also though said that "I am not happy about Carlos, but I won't go into details. Why? Because we talk about these things before the race, and I'm always the only one who respects those agreements. From now on I will be thinking about myself only. It's a shame that i couldn't get more points on lando."

carlos also had some, albeit not as intense things to say about it. 

first he spoke about the pit stop fuck up, saying that

“I don't want to look for who's at fault. It's not the moment to talk or analyze. We need to look [at what happened.] I was already asking to pit 2 laps earlier because I knew Charles was faster and I wanted to let him by, but I wanted to get out of the way. Hamilton was coming behind him and I knew chaos was coming there. I asked to be pitted because there was a lot of graining and we couldn't do anything there. We didn't pit and I stayed out for 2 laps. Even on the lap where I wanted to pit, we made a mess at the pit entry and things didn't go well, but they didn't go well for me, they didn't go well for Charles. I also lost a lot of race time there. It wasn't a nice situation and it wasn't easy to manage. It went like this and that's why I prefer to analyze later and not speak in front of a mic.”

he did acknowledge that charles probably wasn't happy with him during the press conference, saying that "i guess he [charles] isn't happy but i'm also not happy with the way things were handled at the time,i think no one's happy today the in the team because we all expected a bit more [...]."

but he also repeated that “I agreed not to talk to the media because we always talk here, we always make a mess. I agreed with him not to say anything to the media.” and “It's stuff between me and him. I never open the radio, I never talk to the media because I don't like it. It's not a nice thing to do. It's not necessary.”

and planet f1 released a whole article that effectively backed carlos up.

still, charles was effectively still in time out because this was the statement that got released. usually these are with the drivers and done over video. charles just released a written statement:

“I finished the race where I started it today, so it wasn't that exciting, but if you look at the details it was quite an eventful one. Unfortunately, we degraded the fronts on the first stint on Mediums, then we were able to come back on the Hards which were working better. Big congratulations to Max (Verstappen). He deserves this championship title, he has had an [amazing season and always maximised his results which has paid off for him. It gives us motivation to be even stronger next year and hopefully we can put him under some more pressure then. We will push hard in the last two races to try to finish the season ahead of McLaren”

he also posted an instagram post that tagged max (but did not follow him back cause remember that whole stupid thing?) and in this poto fump there was not a single photo of carlos, but there was one with lewis which was relieving, save the caption: 

“First of all, a huge congrats to @maxverstappen for his 4th title, fully deserved. Now only 2 races to go, got to maximise everything on my side to try and take that P2 in the drivers championship and the constructors title. Let's goooo”

he also posted a picture of lewis and tagged him in it.

but during the interviews in vegas, he was so caught up in the ferrari team drama that he forgot max won the championship. 

"It was a track where we had to be pretty fast, the Mercedes were untouchable, we got the best possible result. Verstappen champion? Oh yes that's right &, I forgot, well done to him, he had an exceptional season, he deserves it."

though maybe that was all the weed that was still in the paddock.

charles wasn't the only one pissed over his radio. for example kevin saying “that's not a good thing. that's not a good thing” when his engineer praised him for doing a one stop. 

and also zhou said “See you fucking later, Colapinto” as he passed him.

someone who was not angry though was one nico rosberg, who did not commentate this weekend but he was there, networking for one of his many side projects, finally not wearing beige, and busting out his only dance move in a club, the elbows

so the drivers championship is squared away. constructors is next. we will see how this one shakes out in qatar. only two more to go. see you then.

the 2024 formula 1 silly season and drama master post, part 2 (part 1 here)

Hello and welcome to ah fucking fuck auto caps fuck fuck fuck how do i turn off auto caps AHA there we go okay. take 2

hello and welcome to the great and very insane formula 1 2024 season drama post, part 2. if you are new here or are just looking for part one (which contains the previous 16 (?) races, the off season, pre season testing and everything else, that can be found HERE. (a word to the wise: open it in a browser, not the app, and preferably on a computer to avoid crashing. its fucking long). 

what the hell is formula 1? car go fast. fastest cars in the world zoom around tracks at top speeds of over 300kph, piloted by the top 20 drivers in the world. it might not sound dramatic, but oh man. you will Not be disappointed. this post focuses on the drama, the insanity, the sheer what the hell how is this a serious sport. no legitimately. we've just about seen it all this year. grindr, dogs, watersports, ice cream brands, its all here.

the point of this post? to educate, to catalog the insane drama, and to just have a good time. people like to gatekeep this sport, there is also a lot happening. i try to make it easy to understand. again, probably best to start at the beginning of the post because it does a pretty good job of explaining things, which i began way back in january, and can be found HERE (again, shes long, be careful)

and, as usual, if you do not want to see this post EVER AGAIN, block the tag #saph explains silly season 2024

and a second caution, i assume this post will be getting long as well. including this one we have minimum 9 updates left!

anyway, those of you who have been following along the whole time, welcome back! i know we got a little delayed. and i know we’re on a new post, so lets just briefly take a second for me to explain what the fuck happened. first i had an anatomy test, second i work 2 jobs with fuck ass hours, third tumblr decided to stop letting me look at any of my drafts, fourth tumblr support ghosted me about the drafts issue and the post was half saving half not so i just decided fuck it, were going with post 2, electric boogaloo, and fifth, i decided to start typing this instead in a google docs so. many changes. if you're new here i am usually more on top of this.

but here we are. were back on street circuits. we’re in baku, azerbaijan, for the start of the last third of the season. 8 races remain, world championship titles are still within grasp of multiple people. the drama is dramaing. and today is september 22, 2024 and lets fucking go. 

first and foremost, on account of the fact that this post is late (again, see above), were going to have to do a bit of a speed run. if you're new here, i promise that this is not representative of my normal dedication to the update post. and for those asking, yeah, ill probably compile it somewhere better than a tumblr post after its all said and done, but we don't have time for that now. 

what we do have time for is the Off Week (and like some of the media stuff). and it was filled with silliness: 

george russell decided to wear what can only be described as slightly ugly yellow short shorts with his taylor swift shirt that he got at the eras tour. this was baffling for several reasons, the main reason being that i don't think the internet knew that he was capable of wearing a graphic t shirt

fernando alonso got his aston martin valkyrie finally. in case you are unfamiliar, a valkyrie i think is the worlds fastest street legal car. he posted tweets about this that made it seem like he wanted to fuck the car. hilariously, the car broke down an hour later.

we also had the very thrilling conclusion to grill the grid. oscar won and he somehow managed to look more pleased about his grill the grid win than his first race victory. 

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nico rosberg went to the green awards and he wore a fantastically insane teal blue suit. yes i know hes not a current driver. but you all like hearing about him so ask and you shall receive. unfornunately i cant find a picture of it though

and also not a current driver is mick schumacher, but my roommate asked me to include that he was seen on his girlfriends instagram being bad at golf. like. exceptionally bad at golf. like he hit a tree 20 feet in front of him.

also playing golf was lando norris. except he managed to look like try bolton from high school musical 2.

he also talked about the world driver championship with his friend max fewtrell while they were playing golf. unfortunately i lost this link in the sea of technical difficulties, but the gist of it was that he was saying that there is still hope for him to beat max in the championship (hes about 60 points behind right now). lando doesnt usually talk about the championship because he doesnt want news outlets to paint him as “desperate” so this was interesting

charles leclerc had an insane off week. first he rear ended someone in monaco. then he spoke at a yacht conference. he was not scheduled to speak at said yacht conference, he was there doing something else and they were like hey you're cool people know you, heres a microphone. he alsp ended up on a weather channel while promoting a karting event he was doing for the jules bianchi foundation (his god father, the one who died during the f1 race in japan 2014). he also changed his instagram pop and re centered it because some random tiktoker told him it matched his aesthetic better.

oscar piastri posted a photo of himself sitting in the cockpit of a plane and then promptly deleted it. because he posted it on 9/11. for anyone who doesnt know what that is, that was when some terrorists hijacked commercial planes and few them into the world trade centers in nyc and the pentagon in washington dc

max verstappen also posted a plane pic with himself and lando norris, but he did not delete it.

we also had the return of daniel ricciardo’s jpg instagram account, which is kinda like a finsta for photos that hes taken. i think lando started this a few years ago. 

heading into the race week we certainly got a weird ass batch of pr. including but not limited to:

lewis hamilton was back on top and slaying in the fit game. as was yuki. 

lewis hamilton also exposed george russell as listening to katy perry pre race. katy perry and taylor swift (this was after he claimed that he liked listening to old school rap music.) though, lewis then started singing wrecking ball???? confusing vibes all around

george was not off the hook yet tho because some intern definitely make him say skidibidi toilet or whatever the thing is idk, i might be gen z but im not insufferable, okay? actually george in baku was just all kinds of unhinged

george and alex also got up to something, what it is no one knows but it is clearly something

max pulled up to the paddock de aged about 10 years. picture one is of him in baku in 2015 (i believe he was 17) and picture 2 is this year. no i am not kidding. 

and franco walked into the paddock telling everyone about argentinian mate (which is a drink, not a friend)

and max shoved a microphone out of the way so everyone could gossip

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then of course, we had some slightly more relevant drama

haas announced that ollie would be replacing kevin at baku. in case you forgot, kevin magnussen received a total of 12 penalty points over the season so far, which means he gets one race ban. how did he get the points? well he was mostly wreaking havoc on everyone else so that his teammate, nico hulkenberg, could drag his car into the points. lets all remember the time in saudi arabia where he managed to get 20 seconds of penalties by basically driving like a mad man just to make sure that nico could keep his position after he pit stopped. anyway, nico was kind of pissed about the race ban situation and said “maybe the guidelines for F1 penalties need to be reviewed as the stewards ‘want to get involved’ no matter the contact.”

in any case though, k mags was out. and ollie was in. we’ve seen ollie before. notably he subbed in for carlos sainz at the saudi arabia gp when carlos had appendicitis. he managed to get points as well. since then, he has been announced as a haas driver for 2025 and is now subbing in for k mags (haas, later in the week called him a super sub. clearly no gen z person read that over.) he can do this because ferrari has a haas engine so they share reserve drivers.

adrian newey finally got employed. i know! i can hardly believe it either! but he did! and youll never guess where! 

ferrari? no that would be too obvious. 

mercedes? nah

williams? no too much of a shit show

aston martin? ding ding ding! just the right amount of shit show! 

that is right. newey is going to aston for 2025. 

apparently he was offered a “good package” according to himself, which i assume means pay and also the fact that lawrence stroll made him a shareholder? stakeholder? whatever its called. in the team itself. basically he has a lot of power. 

he said that he always wanted to work with fernando and lewis. and he couldn't do both. and aston had a better package than ferrari. 

fernando looked positively evil during all the announcement pictures. and called the team "definitely the team of the future" and for those of you who don't know, fernando is positively evil. hes just been stuck in a shit box and we havent seen very much of him, but man does he know how to evilly slut it up. so that will be fun to see.

by contrast, people said that lance was not excited enough. and well. lance 1. has resting bitch face and 2. never really looks excited about anything. also he lives in a world where take your child to work day somehow became his job. (his dad owns the team).

lewis hamilton was asked what he thought about adrian not going to ferrari, and here's what he had to say:

"i feel like, while I have mentioned before that it would be an honor to work with adrian, i have been privileged to work with two championship winning teams that didnt have adrian."

mclaren announced pato o ward would do FP1 in mexico. who is pato o ward? hes one of mclaren’s indycar drivers and one of the f1 reserve drivers. he is incredibly charming and definitely runs his own social media as seen here:

mclaren Also claim they figured out who their number 2 driver is and they claim its oscar. i say they claim because the statements were a lot more complex than that. essentially, according to andrea stella, the priority is to the team first, then lando and then oscar. so they didn't outright say that oscar is the number 2 driver and i am willing to bet real money that this is because mr mark webber, oscars manager, has something in oscars contract that prevents him from being a number 2 driver. this is of course because mark webber was one of the most infamous number 2 drivers in f1 history to none other than menace war criminal sebastian vettel, who in their time as teammates, managed to win 4 back to back world champions. or, top to bottom if you're mrs darbus from high school musical. 

lando was asked about this and he said that yes, the team does support him. though he would not expect oscar to give up a win for him and that it is more complex behind the scenes. i suppose we will see if there are any papaya rules coming out this weekend….

and oscar said "i think the main point is its not purely just going to be me pulling over for lando every single race, because thats how none of us, including lando, wont want to go racing, if we feel that someone has done a much better job on a weekend, whichever way it is, we want that person to be rewarded."

max verstappen commented on the mclaren situation as well. which was funny mostly because red bull has one of the most defined number 1 and number 2 drivers of any team. he said "you look at it form oscar's perspective, he is closer to lando than lando to me. they have to deal with that."

and allow me to put on a tin foil hat as we are about to talk about the future of the red bull seat. because all i have to offer here is a baseball hat and a red bull can. 

a long time ago we talked about the red bull cans. the ones that red bull makes to promote f1. at the end of last season red bull put max and checo on the red bull can. this season at the start it was just max on the red bull can. well. now checo has reappeared on the cans too. and i will tell you what i think this means. it means that checo is not getting swapped this season, which was a possibility for awhile. 

but! there is more! 

daniel ricciardo made an instagram post this week. and it was very interesting. but most interestingly he was wearing a red bull hat.

which he does occasionally, no big deal really. he did race for the for several years, he technically does currently. BUT then he showed up TO THE PADDOCK wearing the red bull hat.

which is Big Interesting. usually you show up in a statement outfit or wearing the team kit. and daniel is not a red bull racing driver. he is a visa cashapp racing bulls driver. they might be owned by red bull but they are Not the same team. so why the red bull hat. in the paddock. well, the rumor is that hes taking checos seat for 2025. and the rumor is that this will be announced before mexico. so checo can have a proper send off. 

and with that. the baku lore. 

theres a lot that has happened at baku. as i said its a street circuit. and i think its the fastest street circuit. but over the years theres been some notable events. 

such as the great kimi raikkonen radio for gloves and steering wheel:

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they gave mini kimi this week gloves and steering wheel in honor of that

the max and daniel crash in 2018 when they were running p1 and p2 respectfully

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and of course. how could we forget. charles’s infamous “i am stupid” radio.

speaking of charles, he crashed again in fp1. not quite in the same spot, but nearly. he took a picture with the marshalls. 

then in fp2 he rage quit, basically saying that the car sucks. 

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but he was back and better than ever in practice three because he managed to top the time charts. welcome back fuck ass ferrari.

some other teams definitely experienced the lows but not really the highs of baku during practice. like lance stroll who came on the radio to say “this is not a car” (good thing they have adrian newey now, right? 

franco colapinto also cut his ear before practice on the neck strengthener stretcher thing that they all use and the team wanted to give him stitches but he was like no no no i need to be in the car in about 5 minutes im not doing that. so he jammed on his helmet and jumped in the car. he also crashed and when he went to the medical center he took off his helmet and there was blood everywhere and they were like no no no you cannot race! and he was like no! this is not from the crash! and then explained it and they let him do qualifying. 

also im pretty sure? ollie bearman crashed? in practice? but frankly i don't have time to google it so whos to say. 

but alas. qualifying. 

i know i know this is kind of a shitty update. i promise ill go all out in singapore. i PROMISE. 

so as i said. its a street circuit. high speed. 90 degree corners. and also windy as hell. we also had the dynamic duo of karun and harry in the commentary box. 

max led the first practice, george led the second and i think charles led the third. or some order like that. 

slipstream here is almost essential (slipstream: going behind another car to reduce the wind drag so you can go faster) 

charles has the last three pole positions (first in qualifying) here in baku, but he has never won. by comparison, red bull have never had pole here but they have won. 

and franco has never been to baku before. 

i think that's all the exposition that we need here. 

q1 started with max complaining about his car. “the car is jumping around like crazy on the rear axle” he said. despite this he was sitting in p3. 

the mid field battle though….the mid field battle was heating the hell up. mostly because none other than franco colapinto, who if you will remember, has never been to baku before, had split the two ferraris. he was in third for the moment, .109 seconds behind carlos sainz and .159 seconds ahead of charles leclerc. we still had a lot of qualifying left to go, so this was probably not going to stay, but it was still insane. he was pushing insanely hard, nearly kissing the walls. clearly he had learned from his crash in practice. 

the two mclarens waited until the very end of q1 to do their final flying push lap, and oscar made it through, but tragedy struck for lando. 

lando was in the middle of his last flying lap, time was ticking down, and there was a Very Brief yellow flag on the track. now, according to rules, you cannot complete your flying lap if there is a yellow flag. so lando pitted and was stuck down in 17th and out of qualifying. this would be the first time that he was out in q1 since vegas last year (which if i remember correctly was also not his fault) 

now though, of course nothing is ever that cut and dry. people thought that there had been a mis showing of a flag. yellow flag means that a car is stopped on track, white flag means that a car is going slowly on the track. and people thought that there had been a yellow flag shown when it was actually supposed to be a white flag (if there had been a white flag then lando would have been able to keep doing his flying lap) lando himself said that he had no idea what people were talking about because there is a light on the steering wheel that lights up when flags are called and he had a big yellow light. so it was clearly a yellow flag. 

if you're concerned about lando being able to pull it out of the bag, id like to point you in the direction of the mexican gp last year where lando qualified 17th and finished 5th. on a track that was hard to overtake on. he can be absolutely insane when he wants to be. worry not gentle reader. 

in any case. also out in q1 was daniel ricciardo, valtteri bottas, zhou guanyu and esteban ocon.

and notably, williams, who was on fucking fire this weekend as we already saw, finished q1 with alex albon in second (ahead of oscar) and franco colapinto in 8th. pierre gasly had somehow managed to also get into 4th. and nico hulkenberg was in 7th with ollie bearman in 13th. i told you the mid field battle was heating the hell up. 

q2. everyone zoomed straight out of the gate. they didn't want to get lando norris’d. but, speaking of that, if lando managed to get no points in the race and charles managed to win, charles would overtake lando in the drivers championship. mark webber himself told this to charles, who was absolutely baffled. 

in any case, charles was kinda suffering right now and that was because he was not getting slipstream from carlos to make his lap faster. meanwhile, carlos seemed to be actively trying to give charles the slipstream because he came on radio to say “he keeps missing the tow” 

and amazingly, franco colapinto was 4 tenths AHEAD of alex albon. alex albon who had not been unqualified by his teammate once since the start of 2023. ex red bull driver alex albon. that alex albon. 

max topped the times in q2, followed immediately by charles. insanely, fernando alonso managed to drag the aston martin to fifth. and franco was right behind him in 6th. by comparison alex albon was in 10th. 

and from q2 we lost ollie bearman, yuki tsunoda (who has never qualified lower than 8th in baku), pierre gasly, nico hulkenberg and lance stroll. so yes, ollie bearman managed to outqualify nico hulkenberg. this is ollies second ever f1 race. 

steaming on forward to q3. 

we had, for review, in q3 the following: 

both ferraris, both red bulls, both mercedes, both WILLIAMS (has not happened since vegas 2023), plus fernando alonso and oscar piastri. 

right out the gate it was wild. 

“red bull! theyve re found their mojo! or have they!” karun said. red bull were in 5th and 6th and not entirely sucking for the moment. 

everyone did one flyer and then came out at the end for a second flyer. 

here were the standings: 

charles, carlos, oscar, george, checo, max, lewis, alex, franco, fernando

and everyone was making it to the line and all was going smooth until-

wait a second what is that

could it be! alex albon! with the air box fan still on his car! surely not!!!

oh but it was! and harry and karun were like oh wow so unfortunate for williams tisk tisk

meanwhile ted jumped on the radio to Loudly announce to everyone that this was insane and if i have time here i will put the rant he ranted cause it was Fantastic.

and what do you know i have time

so we had 3 minutes left qualifying and everyone was pulling out of the pits for their last flyer when oscar hopped on the radio to say

"the williams still has the air box fan in"

"oh what an error! disaster for williams!" karun and harry said. they speculated if the marshalls could get it or if the session needed to be red flagged. but alex threw the fan off the car.

and then they asked "ted have you ever seen that before?" and ted did not hold back:

"ITS A MASSIVE YELLOW FAN HOW COULD YOU MISS IT???!!! HOW COULD THE MECHANICS MISS IT???? I CANT BELIVE THEY WOULD MAKE SUCH A MISTAKE DOWN AT WILLIAMS! SUCH AN EXPERIENCED BUNCH OF GUYS AND GIRLS! WHAT IS GOING ON AT WILLIAMS OPERATIONALLY? HOW COULD YOU SEND A CAR OUT LIKE THAT?"

alex, obviously, got fined for an unsafe release 5k euros. he also had to throw the fan off to the side and got slightly covered in dry ice. he did not get to the a second flying lap. 

franco did tho!

and here were out qualifying results: 

p1: charles p2: oscar p3: carlos p4: checo p5: george p6: max p7: lewis p8: fernando p9: franco p10: alex  p11: ollie p12: yuki p13: pierre p14: nico p15: lance p16: daniel  p17: lando p18: valtteri p19: zhou p20: esteban 

oh ho ho but we werent done yet. because pierre gasly got disqualified from qualifying. for failing fuel flow regulations. and lewis was going to have to start from the pit lane for changing his power unit. 

everyone, and by everyone i mean oscar max and checo, pretty much said that charles was going to get pole no matter what, they knew this coming in and the best they were trying for was second

onto the race. 

notably, this is considered a checo track. this was one of the three races that max did not win last year. because checo won it. its a track that he does well on, evidenced by the fact that he qualified above max in qualifying. so people were expecting big things from him.

and so, we head into lap 1.

charles managed to hang onto the lead. checo passed carlos straight out of the gate for third and max managed to pass george to take fifth. lando had managed to get ahead of nico and up into 13th. notably, franco held onto 8th and ollie was able to hold onto tenth. 

someone who was not doing well was lance stroll, who came on the radio saying that he had a puncture. this was from contact with yuki. lance had to pit for fresh tires and was pretty immediately thrown to the back of the grid. 

by lap 2 lando had managed to get past daniel and was in 12th, he was trying to get past yuki next, which he managed by lap 3. yuki also lost a  spot to nico. 

also slaying in the mclaren was oscar, who took fastest lap. then charles took fastest lap.

and lewis hamilton, who had started from the pit lane, was up to 16th. already. somehow. though he was displeased with the tires, sayig that “this tire is pretty bad” over the radio. 

yuki meanwhile was clearly having a problem because he had started going very very slowly. thought the pit wall said that he had no problems. this would later turn out to be false but we will indulge them for the time being. 

franco was STILL ahead of alex albon on lap 6. STILL. 

lando on lap 8 managed to push his way into points positions, overtaking ollie bearman for 10th. though this was where things were about to slow down for him because in front of him were alex, franco and fernando, who were all very close together and would be hard to get past. 

george was back in bad luck hell as a plastic bag entered his airbox. will he ever catch a break. 

on lap 11 nico hulkenberg finally caught up with ollie bearman and passed him for 11th. 

and max’s car was not working. to potentially no one’s surprise. “i have zero bite in the car” he said. and this was probably true because checo was a whole 6.5 seconds ahead of him. insane gap. 

several pit stops later that i will not detail out because we simply do not have the time, alex albon ended up in 4th and lando ended up in fifth. and oscar was about to get undercut by checo. 

“mojo seems to be back for checo perez” harry said, correctly. 

mojo was back for him indeed. and now he was right behind lando. 

and if you will recall, according to mclaren themselves, priority at mclaren is the team first, then oscar, then lando. but oscar was ahead of lando. so what did mclaren do? 

they asked lando do hold up perez, but not compromise his own race. 

remever a long time ago when i said mclaren wouldn't have any internal drama this season? man how i was wrong.

lando managed to hold up perez for around a lap or two before he got past. this was crucial because this was during when oscar was in the pits. 

thanks to lando and the power of the papaya rules teamwork, oscar ended up coming out in 4th, only .706s ahead of checo. 

mclaren are working together everyone! mclaren are working together!

meanwhile, turns out that yuki did indeed have problems because he retired on lap 17 with a hole in his sidepod from the contact with lance on lap 1. this was now two races in a row where he had had to retire for reasons out of his control. 

several more people pitted. and eventually charles was back out in front, oscar was in p2. until he wasn't. no, he didn't dnf. he overtook charles! he was in p1! he popped out of nowhere! nowhere being 2 car lengths back and just flooring it to spring around charles like a little silly slinky! karun called it a “good, fair and robust defense,” which sounds like its descibing notes in wine. but this was not wine. this was the baku gp. and we were only half done. 

ollie bearman was defending against lewis hamilton, holding on tightly to 14th place. 

charles was still behind oscar and he could not get past, despite the fact that he was still very much in spitting distance. “they are pushing like crazy or they have more grip than us” he said. 

carlos got past both lando and alex albon and was up into 4th

this brought max up behind lando. max was on 11 lap old tires and lando was on 24 lap old tires. but lando still defended like hell and managed to hold onto sixth. max was 0.632 seconds behind lando on lap 25 when he said that “my brakes are not working.” this was hardly a surprise. max has hated the car since china.

also experiencing technical difficulties was sir lewis hamilton. he was stuck down in 14th and was first told to do “everything you can do to get the surface temp down” of the tires. he said “im trying” then several laps later on lap 29 he came on the radio to say “are you seeing how i have to drive this thing?” “yes,” bono, his engineer said. “quite effective though.” 

max was still half a second behind lando. mclaren faked a pit stop call over the radio to get max to pit. he did not. 

but, george russell did manage to pass him. which was “not good for max’s world champion aspirations.”

this was also when ted very bafflingly said that “if i had a sofa in the pit lane i would be jumping up and down on it” im not sure what that was in response to. 

meanwhile, ollie was still holding off sir lewis hamilton. and charles was trying to get oscar to pit again by lying over the radio. it was not working. 

lando did a pit stop finally and came out a whole 15 second behind max. he was hoping to catch max by the end of the race. but it might be tight. lets go last lap lando. 

“lando, imagine andrea on your shoulder saying ‘zero wheel spin’ in every exit,” lando’s race engineer said. if you're confused, everyone else was too. 

10 laps to go and here were the order of affairs:

oscar

+.449s charles +1.865s checo +2.989s carlos +16.530s george  +1.909s max +11.535s lando +9.715s fernando +2.589s alex +2.451s nico +4.667s franco +1.590s lewis +1.261s ollie +1.791s pierre +9.205s daniel +23.919s esteban  +.789s lance +3.862s valtteri +3.631s guanyu 

lando was determined. he took fastest lap on lap 43 and was 8.8s behind max

at this point, the leaders were starting to lap the cars in the back. “the back markers are starting to come up,” checo’s engineer said to him. “its going to get messy.”

“hold onto your hats and if you don't have one go get one and hold onto it” harry said. harry would turn out to be correct. 

we had the top 3 all running very close to eachother, that was oscar, charles and checo and “welcome to the party carlos sainz!” who was now 1.2 seconds behind checo in the four way battle for the lead.

definitely not leading was lance stroll, who retired on lap 47 with a brake problem. 

oscar managed to pull ahead of charles by 1.5 seconds, finally knocking him out of DRS range. so now it was a three way battle for second. and charles had “no rear tires. no rear tires at all.” 

and, just like i said he would, lando managed to pass max on lap 49. he was closing the gap slowly in the championship. 

“verstappen’s day goes from bad to worse,” harry said. because lando still had fastest lap, so he would score 3 more points than max. which is important if lando wants to beat max in the championship (though i think hes still like 60 points behind)

meanwhile! franco managed to pass nico hulkenberg for 10th! he was in the points!!!! at his second race!!! 

but this was short lived because there was a crash! a big smackeroo! between carlos and checo!! checo was mad, carlos didn't know what happened. 

what happened was that carlos was trying to pass checo but checo did not move over. it was deemed an equal fault accident. both of them were utterly confused at what happened and apparently spent 20 minutes in the medical center being utterly lost and aparently saying that sometimes this sport sucks. and! contrary to what several people said! checo did not bang on carlos’s helmet after the crash. 

the crash actually caused chef's dad to have a heart attack. he is stable now.

and well. this clip of george from the post qualifying interviews definitely didnt age well:

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but! since we were a matter of a few laps from the end, this meant that the rest of the race was finished under a virtual safety car. 

which meant 

OSCAR PIASTRI WINS THE AZERBAIJAN GP

and george inherited p3! 

and on his own merit too! no safety cars, no team orders, no weird shit! 

“yes!” he whispered over the radio. 

he almost fell getting out of the car, then gave us all the “one moment” hand gesture before properly celebrating. 

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he also got driver of the day! 

(this was marginally better than george russell, who said over the radio “i cant get any rubber (to pick up on his tires) all im getting is leaves”)

gunther steiner also hosted the post race interviews. which was interesting. 

george said that the most difficult part of the race was “driving full gas into a wall of carbon fiber on the penultimate lap…the vsc should have come out sooner” 

charles bashed ferrari because they didn't do any high fuel runs in practice. 

oscar was entirely pleased. “i managed to overtake and hold onto it for the next 35 laps..one of the better races of my career.” and honestly, oscar winning a race straight after mclaren basically announcing that he was their number 2 driver is nothing short of hilarious.

and! mclaren was now leading the constructors championship by 20 points! for the first time in ten years!!!!

the top three had a moment outside of the car that was filled with baffled: 

and oscar's engineer tom got to stand on the podium with him. he usually takes a selfie with oscar after each race he podiums at, but he was too excited to so george took this picture for them

(george also aparently demomished oscar in a game of uno on the plane, immediately humbling him)

george also shielded himself from the champagne on the podium

the cooldown room reacted to the crash in a very straight forward manner:

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and very quickly cause its midnight and the singapore gp starts in 8 hours, the post race, speed ran: 

-mark webber told off laura winter for thinking that oscar didn't have good tire management

-alex albon was “super happy, that's a lot of points for us” (williams finished in 7th and 8th). he cut his own interview short when ollie bearman arrived, saying “I can go, im happy to go” and then waving comically. 

-williams was so pleased with this result they blasted everyone with champagne. and they overtook alpine in the constructors championship! this was also their best race finish all season

-(and a quick note, if youre going to really blame logan for being that shit of a driver here, please remember that the car he was driving was several rounds of upgrades behind alex's pretty much the entire time he was driving it)

-ollie became the first driver to ever score points in his first two races for two different constructors because the double dnf pushed him up to 10th place. he said that there was not much difference between the haas and the ferrari, the ferrari was just red

-franco continued to charm everyone and flirt with the reporters. 

-they interviewed george and lewis and the camera had to be adjusted for george's height. it was comical and resulted in my favorite edit so far of the season (sound on)

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-lando looked pleased and happy for once. he said about holding off checo that “i didn't hold him up i just had to cool my tires a little.” he was delighted to be leading the constructors for the first time in ten years and he defended alex albon saying “i struggled to get past alex for a while, which is common, alex doesnt make mistakes.” he also ratted on max for going to fast during the VSC and said “i didn't complain, facts were stated.” and to sum it all up he said that “im executing things well, i’m very quick…i’m not going to be the happiest guy, but i am never the happiest guy….car is performing well everywhere…some red cars behind us seem to be our biggest competitors right now” 

-by comparison george insulted all of pirelli. the tire people. “pretty infuriating that it (the pace) changes this so much….its black magic, people who make the tires don't understand the tires…..for 20 laps we had a car not worthy of points and for 20 laps we had a car fighting for victory and the only difference is the tires.” 

-lewis was notably upset after the race and walked through the paddock with his helmet on, not wanting to talk to anyone. but he did talk to franco and ollie and congratulate them on a job well done defending against him and racing against him. franco even fangirled over this on his instagram. 

-charles was clearly upset with ferrari. he was so upset he posted a thirst trap.

-and oscar. oscar was very happy this afternoon. and his mom was there! she doesnt usually come cause it scares her, but nicole was there today! 

-mclaren celebrated with a hell of a lot of champagne. both oscar’s wina and lando’s insane recovery, and the fact that they were leading the championship. red bull have been dethroned, at least for now. 

-there was so much champagne that lando took off his socks to spray it. all seems well at mclaren. 

-at least one thing is for sure, oscar had a better time here this weekend than last year when he got food poisoning and only ate four pieces of toast

and with that. we head into singapore. quite literally as it is starting in a few hours. again, i apologixe about this post. its a little sad, but the next one will be better. pinkly promise. 

see you all soon!!!

[higuchisora]

Seeing as they clearly didn't know what the hell to do with Jinx/the political repercussions of her bombing the council in season 2, I'd like to explore the possibilities of how Zaun would've reacted to this that would've made way more sense than what we saw.

1. Jinx becomes an extremely controversial figure.

Few are neutral to her. This would be largely because, outside of knowing she blew up the council, no one actually knows WHY. What were her motives? Were they politically charged? Was she trying to start a war? What exactly was her goal? It was never really stated that she was infamous prior to this, but I recall in season 1 act 2 that when Vi went looking for her, people knew OF Jinx, and that she worked for Silco, but weren't really aware of any further details (ex: Babette, who knew Vi when she was younger, heard of Jinx but didn't even know that her and Powder are the same person). So those that are aware of her connection to Silco- who objectively did make many of their lives worse with Shimmer- wouldn't be happy. They'd be scared of what will come next.

Those who don't know/don't care might fill in the blanks with their own guesses, maybe that she's some kind of activist- which would split them further into the subgroups of "Oh fuck the enforcers are gonna kill us and it's her fault" and "Finally, a war!" The second of which I'd argue would actually be a very small group. I could imagine the Jinxers being seen by the rest of Zaun as crazy radicals who don't know what they're getting themselves into/are gonna drag the rest of Zaun into danger. I think it would cause a LOT of infighting. Like a civil war inside another civil war.

How Jinx would handle this would be.... interesting. Especially if the Jinxers start making moves on their own. She never really shows much interest in activism- she works for Silco because he's her new dad, and while she doesn't seem to DISAGREE with his opinions, it doesn't seem she's all that invested in actually working to make it happen beyond just wanting to help her dad. His death seemed to take her interest with it.

Now, they could either lean into this, and make people question her motives/actions because of her clear disinterest, maybe increasing some of the controversy around her (no follow through on her action, letting Zaunites suffer the consequences, etc.), or they could make her actually take a genuine personal interest in it. But that, I think, would take a bigger arc that might be more work for arguably less payoff when considering you'd probably have to change a great deal of her character to do it, especially when you could probably achieve similar plot points/outcomes even without her intentionally becoming a political figurehead.

2. Zaun becomes fractured politically/other "symbols" of Zaun

This can be in tandem with idea 1, actually, but can still be it's own idea. Basically, after the fall of the council, and Silco's death, Zaunites are terrified. They've been run so far by Vander, Silco, and then some vague council-like oligarchy of Chem-Barons, who could be interpreted as functioning like very large gangs. The Chem-Barons have always been around, but with Silco's sudden death (and no one who was primed/expecting to replace him), this leaves a massive power vacuum that the Chem-Barons and smaller gangs are scrambling to come out on top of.

The fear of the unknown and the extreme instability would lead to people desperately throwing their lot in with whoever they think would be a better/less dangerous leader, and by extension, political symbol. Season 2 shows a bunch of new people joining the Firelights. In that case, I can imagine that before long, several new potential leaders surface, even if they didn't expect it. Namely, Ekko, Jinx, and Sevika.

Ekko because as I said, people were apparently coming to his base in droves. They don't tell us Jack shit about the Firelights besides the fact that A) Ekko leads them B) they don't fuck with Silco OR Piltover C) Piltover thinks they're terrorists and D) they look rad as fuck. That being said, considering Ekko's Everything, I think we can all gather a general picture of what the Firelights are about. Plus his cool tree would be a great symbol (@srslylini for the idea) of growth, healing, etc.

Sevika, because those that knew her as Silco's second might be hoping for some kind of stability with her. Even if they didn't like Silco, it's better the enemy you know and all that jazz. They'd feel safer with someone who at least seems to know what they're doing, even if Sevika herself has no interest in becoming a leader. I think some would just naturally gravitate towards who they see as "second in line". This could also be in connection to Jinx, as she could possibly been seen as someone who could "rein" Jinx in (again, most people don't actually KNOW Jinx, they just know OF her and that she worked for Silco and was volatile. Think how Finn referred to her as Silco's "attack dog").

Speaking of Jinx, she'd probably be treated similarly to idea 1. Extremely polarizing. Her followers would be seen as crazy, like she is. They'd be seen as warmongers and/or people who have no idea what they're getting themselves into. They'd basically be seen as the stereotypical "young rebels". The average Zaunite would see the average Jinxer as a young, angry, maybe idealistic radical who doesn't understand the cost of war. I'd argue that, again, they'd probably be the smallest and most controversial group just because most people don't necessarily WANT a war, even if they're willing to fight for it. And the suddenness of the bombing would've scared even some of the rebels who DO want war, because they weren't prepared. It wasn't a PLANNED attack, so both Zaun AND Piltover are basically caught with their pants down, which would also bring some ire from the other Zaunites.

There's another option for a faction I'd like to explore, also thanks to srslylini (thank you icon), but it takes a bit of setting up.

In a hypothetical situation in which Vi did NOT become an enforcer, I think it would happen like this: Vi hangs around in Piltover at first out of guilt/feeling like she has nowhere else to go. She's still not on board with being an enforcer, but she attends the memorial out of a sense of obligation. Her and Caitlyn have a falling out over Caitlyn calling Zaunites "animals", and here is where she storms off and goes back to Zaun, with the final words to Caitlyn that "You Pilties are all the fucking same" (or something to that effect). She's still feeling lost, and so maybe this is where she stumbles around, having maybe a similar pitfighting arc (just not as distraught, more like she's broke and angry and has to pay rent somehow so she might as well get paid to punch someone's face in). Because she's not in a massive spiral, there's unfortunately no emo arc (sad), but the bright side of this is that she's recognizable. I don't think she's FAMOUS, per say, but Babette and Ekko recognized her right off the bat in season 1 (yes you can say Ekko was really close to her, but Babette? C'mon), and considering she was older than Powder when she went off to prison, I don't think it's a stretch to assume her face was a little better-known than her sister's (especially considering she was already going on jobs, and in act 1 she gets into a fight with Deckard who I'm pretty sure knew her name, but not Powder's).

This is to say, I think a lot of the "old heads" knew who she was, especially those who liked Vander. It helps that she tattooed her name on her face LMAO. So I'd imagine she'd show up in the ring, no hair dye no makeup, and eventually after consistently knocking her opponents around and winning every time, she'd become a bit locally famous again- to the point that those same "old heads" who remember her make the connection and come looking. Maybe rumors start swirling, especially once they learn she was gone because she'd been in prison- not unheard of, and probably the first conclusion they drew when they realized she wasn't dead.

So eventually Vander's old followers/younger people who idolized him from their childhood start seeking her out. Sensationalizing her. Asking her what she's planning on doing. Is she taking back the Lanes? Will she get those Chem-Barons under control? What about Jinx? Could she hunt her down, rein her in? Hell, maybe even put her to use? Will you give us our relative safety, our security back?

And Vi, who just wanted to knock some heads around and maybe take a nap in her apartment and cry, is suddenly faced with being "Vander 2.0" and Jinx is the new "Silco 2.0" and all the weight of expectations and legacy and history and literal war and politics are being shoved in her face. She, like Jinx, is now faced with becoming a figurehead when she never wanted to be, which could lead into option 3:

3. A joint approach to Zaun

This would primarily be driven by Sevika even if she wasn't one of the possible leaders, because SOMEONE has to be the responsible adult here and it's certainly not any of these traumatized losers (affectionate). She'd be the glue to keep it all together, the reluctant team mom who WILL make this work because she WILL have Zaun even if she has to die to get it.

This could work with either Jinx and Vi, or Jinx, Vi, and Ekko (I genuinely can't imagine season 2 act 1 Ekko willingly teaming up with season 2 act 1 Jinx AND Sevika without some kind of buffer). Basically, once the other "leader candidates"/political symbols have been established, Sevika would round them up with the intention to use their influence to unite Zaun against Piltover. This would take a LOT of arguing, but ultimately I think she'd be able to get them to shut up and hear her out for a moment. Regardless of how different their beliefs are about what the "ideal Zaun" looks like, they can all agree that Piltover isn't in any of those pictures. She could convince them to set aside their own squabbling for the time being, for the greater good: aka, the independence of Zaun.

At the very least, I think she'd be able to get them to agree that Piltover coming down and hurting Zaunites in revenge shouldn't be ignored, and that they're currently a bigger threat than their fellow Zaunite. So eventually they'd reach some kind of truce: behave like a united front against Piltover, push them out of Zaun, stabilize Zaun, and then worry about tearing each other apart later. And because all of these characters- ALL of them- have shown (prior to season 2) anti-Piltover sentiments, they'd at least be able to agree that enforcers shouldn't be allowed to beat down on their people (especially in this version where Vi has better, more consistent writing lmao).

Of course, Rome wasn't built in a day, so maybe they don't reach a total agreement immediately- maybe they just agree to a ceasefire at first, but still refuse to work together. But once Caitlyn becomes a dictator? Once enforcers start gassing the streets, rounding people up, implementing martial law?

That's when the gloves would come off.

I'd imagine this could also be part of how Vi and Jinx slowly start to repair their relationship. They've got bigger fish to fry, but also, this time their enemy is connected to their own personal conflict with each other. Jinx might ask, "what happened to your enforcer girl? What happened to being a Piltie lapdog?" And Vi would essentially, in perhaps more emotionally constipated words, explain that it wasn't really about Caitlyn, it was about being needed. It was about trying to find Jinx, about trying to stop Silco, about trying to "fix" things, only realize that she couldn't. It was about trying to make things better, but that she realized the person she was trying to do that with didn't actually care. That all she wanted was to make sense of the destruction of her old life, and find meaning in a new one. And I think Jinx, too, in her own emotional constipation, would resonate with that, would understand that. It wouldn't fix things between them, but I think it'd be a start.

It could also help their relationship with Ekko. Since Vi isn't an enforcer this time, and season 1 (the One True Season) showed their sibling relationship, I think her and Ekko's bonding would be more like "reconnecting with an old friend", whereas Jinx and Ekko would have a lot of work to do, too. There'd probably be a bit of a cold war between them for a while, once Ekko agrees to help, because he knows actually talking to her would piss him off. But eventually, through Sevika's manhandling of these three, and being forced to make nice with reluctant-figurehead-Jinx, they'd connect again.

Perhaps part of a plan is for them to develop new technology for Zaun. Whether that's weapons against Piltover (unlikely on Ekko's part I think), or just safety gear/ safer city infrastructure ideas for the betterment of their people, I think eventually they'd figure themselves out, too. He'd see the Powder in her, the part he saw on that bridge, and maybe it would give him the ability to try and understand Jinx. And Jinx would realize that maybe these people in her life DO love her, DO care about her, more than just for what she used to be but for who she is now. And somewhere along the way, they'd be friends again (or they can date IDK man I just want them to stop trying to kill each other).

Whatever happens next is so wide in possibility that I can't possibly cover it here so this is where it ends, lol.

[luciferanalyzestar]

Live reaction to Mastermind, ughhhhh.

Spoilers of course.

Gross.

I like this design; she's cute. Shout out to the character designers.

Satan's design is like whatever. Those imp-like horns on the top of his head looks silly. Just more fucking red on top of red. Loveart23's Satan design for her re imagined is peaked.

This shit is fucking gross, please STOP!

This design is bad too and Ozzie's outfit is hideous.

Bee's outfit here is 100% better than her main one.

See Mammon, no one wants you because you are fat and that's gross!!!! >:(((((

Notice that Mammon is the only sin that is overweight and the only one confirmed to be on the asexual spectrum. Levi's design is horrible. Those colors do not go together.

This line would be amazing if Loona wasn't a whole ass adult. This is so melodramatic I am giggling. "I love you guys." Yeah, you threaten to sexual assault them both to Mooxie and stalked them back in season 1. These characters are not "found family". This is the quality of this show now, just ass.

I skipped the song; I'm not listening to that shit. I'm tired of hearing Stolas singing about Blitz, This is a small smile on my face, you know why just look like my username.

YES SATAN!! This shit got me laughing, why he is crying over Stolass?? Fuck him, he is a fetishizer.

This is the FIRST time Stella and Via have interacted....we are at the end of season two. Look guy, she's being EVIL!!!!! and doesn't care about her daughter at all. *eye roll*

What does Stolas even do?? We never seen him do his royal duties, just fucking around with IMP or he is in his mansion.

You want to fuck your sister.

GET IT!! HE EATS A LOT!!!! MAMMON IS FAT!!!!! ISN'T THAT GROSSS!!!!!???????

I WANT TO PUNCH A HOLE IN MY WALL. Viv will never beat the fatphobia allegations. Let fat character exists without doing shit like this.

I notice that all or most of rail thin characters are rarely seen eating food but Mammon and Adam who are fat eat food on the regular.

I'm sending the fandom there too. My new favorite minor character! Thank you, janitor imp. You're a real one for this.

She better not assault Blitz every again.

Why is Blitz bathing him??? This is giving me bad vibes like why????

DROWN!!! Please do us a favor and DROWN!!!

Rating: 2/10

I don't care about Blitz, Stolas, and their relationship. It is boring and bland like dry moldy toast. It being the main "appeal" to Helluva is an awful choice, no one can tell me otherwise. This is why the views have been dropping since the released of Full Moon. The shippers are this show's life support and if they ever become unhappy, this show is tank.

This episode barely kept my attention unlike the previous one. I even paused it to eat some Hawaiian Rolls, and I had more fun eating bread than watching this episode.

The only thing that kept me interested was the small mentions of Lucifer. If did not have a hyper fixation on him, I would probably not finish the episode.

The crew hyping up Vassago by putting him in that pride parade print and other merch is funny because he does nothing. He has no personality out of being Spanish. If something is hyped by Viv or anyone else, it's going to be lame.

We know season three will have more focus on Ars Goetia so he will probably be Stolas' future Latin lover or even worse, a love triangle between him, Stolas, and Blitz. Vassago and Stolas should get together, they both have "ass" in their names.

Viv said this episode is one of her favorites and is self-indulgent. Self-indulgent where??? This is just your standard season two epsiode of Helluva. I thought it was going to be more of a musical episode.

Anyway, this episode is bad in my opinion.

[dizzyduck44]

So let me get this straight. This weekend

Lewis makes some sarcy comment about Lando losing the lead in the sprint.

Lando leads race start to last corner, dragging his teammates arse round in his DRS the whole way, to then gives up the win on the line against team orders.

Stewards went for a tea break during quali, arrived back for Q3.

Max gets given a single place grid drop, losing pole.

Max goes on the war path with George, squares up to him on the drivers parade, (insert swear word of choice where you think appropriate) “I hope you and your FIA buddies are happy”.

Oscar cuts the pit white line in front of Lewis and is under investigation before the cars make it to the grid. 😡

Race starts, Lewis jump starts, Lando nearly takes the lead at the first corner.

Esteban (who unbeknownst to anyone was driving his last race for Alpine) collides with Franco in the first corner.

Two corners later Lance Stroll drives into Alex and gets a 10 second penalty and 2 penalty points.

Lewis gets a 5 seconds penalty for the jump start.

Liam then gets a 10 second penalty and 2 penalty points for causing a collision.

Maybe from earlier contact Alex’s wing mirror decides to go solo and sits on the start finish straight.

FIA has a meltdown. They turn the pit straight into a disco light, yellow/green/yellow/green/yellow/green/yellow/green. Double yellow. We select double yellows. No back to single yellows. No we really think this should be a double yellow.

Meanwhile drivers are pottering around, Max is pumping in fastest laps, race continues until Valtteri takes out the mirror and makes a bad situation 30 times worse.

The FIA have to do something now right?

NO.

Because by now Max wants the world to burn and has started screaming he doesn’t think Lando lifted during the flag Hokey Cokey.

Well Max they ain’t got time to care about that, because Lewis and Carlos now have punctures.

Someone at the FIA remembers they employ a safety car driver for a reason and send him out.

Safety car goes through the pits so the debris can be moved. (This option was available to them 10 minutes earlier) and Lando nearly runs into the back of Lewis who suddenly slams on.

Calm decends for a few laps. Until. Yeah it’s Max again. “Anything from that yellow flag?” (Remember this later).

Safety car is coming in, cars seem confused about when Max will go. Max and Lando are on the radio saying the safety car lights are still on. Lando’s team tell him they aren’t.

We start racing.

Hell breaks loose.

The stewards decide that Lando didn’t lift during the double yellow, despite the fact they didn’t know what flag to put out, and it changed as he passed the sign. 10 second stop go penalty and 3 penalty points.

Now I am well aware there will have been people watching who have never even heard of this penalty. Apparently the last one given was 2018. For comparison, the FIA gave Max a 5 place grid drop for the same offence at the same track last year. The same year they allowed a tractor and Marshalls on the track in the pouring rain with no flags.

Lewis gets a second penalty, this time a drive through, again don’t see many of those, it’s normally penalty added to your race time. By now I swear they are just looking for penalties they haven’t handed out yet this weekend.

And a 10 second penalty and 2 penalty points for Alex for causing a collision as well.

Sergio also gets investigated for dangerous driving.

BUT WAIT

We then give George a 5 second penalty and a penalty point for driving too far behind the safety car.

Post race Max continues to rant about George and how he effectively begged for the grid penalty and decides now he was asking about Lando as he thought “he had got DRS from a back marker” and wanted to be sure that was why he caught up. Note earlier comments he asked TWICE about.

Lando with zero context of what the world has just seen, takes it hard and thinks he is responsible for the whole shit show.

Oscar gets given a reprimand for his earlier pit lane incident.

Ted Kravitz has confirmed that the lights on the top of the safety car did in fact go out. But the drivers can’t see them because of a spoiler on the back of the car! The ones underneath did in fact NOT go out.

AND THEN

Fans have found Ferrari might not have lifted during the double yellows either!!!!

Seriously when pissed off fans are more on top of data than the stewards, what is even the point?

The FIA need to realise they are there for the safety of the drivers, teams and spectators. This is the point the teams need to band together and address the FIA, what were you doing for 8 minutes with debris on the track? You’ve handed out one of the harshest penalties for a situation you created. Two drivers had punctures because of a situation you created.

Honestly I know Esteban won’t be on the grid in Abu Dhabi, Lewis seems to have zero motivation to do it. Unless you are McLaren, Ferrari, RB or Alpine do you even care about this race?

Seriously so many errors were made in the running of this race today I would say strike it from the record, but Zhou and Sauber got points!!!! And that would be far too cruel.

But I leave you with this thought. The FIA can stop a race and abandon it due to poor driving standards. Does this go both ways? Can drivers stop and abandon a race for poor stewarding standards? Today would have been a strong candidate.

[icarusredwings]

Thinking about married poolverine at the x mansion for the Christmas parties.

I like to think that even after he's quit drinking and is older, Wade lets him sit around the mansion and drink a shit ton of egg nog and just.. chill. Wade won't let anyone ask him to do anything except.. what he didn't know.. is that he signed logan up to be santa for the younger kids, and he's definitely dressed as Mrs. Clause, a wig, heels, red and white fluffy skirt, everything.

"You want me to wear what??"

"Oh, come on its for the kids peanut! Besides... ill repay you later~"

"Wade, these kids are like 12 theyre not gonna-....fine"

By the adult party runs around and the kids under 21 are forced off into their rooms, morph kurt and logan are lounging on the couch trying to sing a german carol after busting out the GOOD Alchool but Kurt forgets half of it so its just the three of them mummbling nonsense and wade thinks its the cutest most humble thing he's ever seen Logan do. Just.. a guy being a guy with his friends. And he's so happy. Soooo happy to finally have them back. Even if these aren't HIS x men, he's missed this so bad. Later he will cry because he misses HIS x men but for now? Let him be not sober and forget about that.

"Alright santa. I think its time for bed." Wade says, still in his Mrs. Clause outfit, trying to tug Logans arm up.

"Aye! Get offa me! My husband will kill you!" He throws a fit and backs away, into kurt who's tail flickers and gives her a dirty look. Who does this woman think she is?? Trying to make his friend commit adultery???

Wade pauses, then giggles, realizing just how much makeup he had on right now. He's utterly estatic that Logan won't come with him. It's only really morph whos confused because that's obviously Wade. You would think the guy could smell his own husband right?? Yeahhh... not like this.

"Teehee and that right there is why it's bedtime, peanut." He says, hoping itll spark a few plugs but logan only does the Loading cat face, tilting his head. His face is red from the alchool and the santa make up.

"Don't call me that!" He whines.

Wade rolls his eyes, smiling. "Baby, come on. You're tired." He says in that special voice. The one that leads Logan down to earth when his anger is the only thing he can see when he forgets who he is, when he's having his PTSD attacks.

"... I am?"

"Yes. Now come on. Time for bed."

Kurt whispers not to be tempted by her in his ear, and it's back to square one. It takes Remy interfereing by telling Kurt that this "devil woman" IS Logan's husband and that it's okay.

The whole thing is a mess, and it has Rouge giggling her ass off, hugging her brother as his tail flickers still.

"Ooh!! You big buzz ball! Always lookin afta folks aint ya?" She tells him, squeezing him enough to make him wheeze. "Careful cher, Gambit thinks he wants his ribs attached."

"Nonsense! A lil roughhousin nevah killed nobody!!"

You just see him trying to take Wade to their room and Logan does the little slap at his arms and is like "I can walk by myself lady! Jeez!! ..... wheres my husband? Im gonna tell on you!!"

"I AM your husband." Wade says, finally taking off the wig and caressing his chop the way he usually does. Logan's eyes squint, his eyebrows burrowing together before dilating, and Wade can swear he heard his heart beat quicken.

Laura gags.

"....'sup" he says, pulling him closer with a big idiotic grin.

Wade squeals, now trying to push him away. "Eww!! Never say that again!" He giggles. "You big lud! Bedtime!"

It's the absolute sweetest thing anyone ever witnessed, and it makes Jean happy too to know someone did infact take the big bad putty tat home. Finally-

This is how I want every teacher au Christmas fic to go you understand me? No sentinal drama. No worries. Maayyybbee Magneto if he behaves.

Just let this man be HAPPY for once.

[venomhound]

Hazbin Hotel - Petname Headcanons Part 2

OH HEY. Its the heavily requested post that yall probably gave up on (because its been literal months)! Right before my holiday hiatus! OOF. Anyway, lineup is Adam, Angel Dust, and Husk. I hope yall like it, and happy holidays ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

First part can be found >>HERE<< Valentino DLC also available >>HERE<<

Contents/WARNINGS: Gender neutral reader; talks about what yall like to be called during sex; daddy kinks; casual reminder that Angel may be canon gay, but trans and non-binary people exist so please don't be stupid in comments. :))) (18+), MDNI, NSFW below the cut ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

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Adam ₊˚ ‿︵୨୧

What He Calls You

Bitch

No, but seriously. Being with Adam is one of those weird relationships where you both are like 'whats up, bitch?' to eachother and its fine?? Your ""terms of endearment"" are less endearing and more casually insulting.

Honestly, its probably one of the main reasons Adam fell for you. Your headstrong and don't take shit from anyone. Including him. Hence why he tends to call you feisty , wild thing, or spice girl (yes, for those gentlemen out there; Adam will also call you spice girl).

Like everything Adam does though, these names can be very double edged. He will use them when he is praising you or cheering you on; such as when your getting in another angel's face, "YEAH, thats my spice girl! You tell them!" But he will also use the names sarcastically when your getting in his face and telling him off, "Woah, woah, calm down feisty."

Everything is said in jest however. Adam won't call you anything that legitimately hurts your feelings or hits on a sore spot. He just likes to tease and his toxic masculinity won't let him be too sweet on ya. On that topic...

You better hope Adam doesn't find out about any particular insecurities you have. Because he will hone in on them and make it a point to constantly be talking about how much he loves whatever it is. Adam is like a weird combination of football coach and personal hype guy.

Your self conscious about your chest? Adam is now walking around calling you sugar tits. Don't like your ass? Adam now makes a point to smack it in public and starts calling you peachy. Think your voice sounds terrible? He now calls you his little birdy and talks about how much he loves to make you ""sing"" for him. (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

Don't challenge Adam when it comes to naming things. He was the one tasked with naming everything in Eden so he is really good at it. No matter what your insecurity is, he has a petname to beat it.

What You Call Him

Adam appreciates a partner who can dish it as well as take it. So he is gonna like sarcastic nicknames for himself as well. Just keep them playful and not actually mean. Adam is surprisingly sensitive under the macho exterior he projects.

So you have to be careful about crossing a line and actually hurting his feelings. If this happens, Adam will have a hard time admitting that it hurt him, instead opting to fake laugh and go uncharacteristically quiet.

Play into his ego by calling him things like rockstar, soldier, guitar hero, or legend. Use these with sass for that extra kick. Be the one goading him into doing things for a change by saying, "I thought you were a legend?" Then praise him afterwards with a, "now that's my rockstar!"

Calling him my angel will absolutely send Adam for a loop. When you first say it, Adam just goes completely silent as his expression roulettes between the different stages of grief and complete confusion.

Adam doesn't really buy into the whole heaven and angels are inherently flawless/good thing. So when you call him "your angel" he has no idea how to respond. His brain is like, yeah that's technically true. That's a literal fact. He is an angel.

But Adam's brain is also vacillating between taking it as an insult or a compliment. Are you calling him fake? Are you saying he is perfect? Are you just trying to be cute? He has no idea.

Adam decides not to overthink it and settles on the petname just being a big ol' question mark to him. So whenever you call him it, he just playfully scoffs and rolls his eyes. He is actually okay with being clueless.

NSFW Section

Biggest daddy kink known to man. Justifiably so. He is the first dad after all. The original daddy. The very first time you two have sex, Adam is expecting you to call him daddy and referring to himself as it.

Likewise, Adam defaults immediately to calling you babe and baby in the bedroom. He will also growl out things like 'thats my girl' or 'thats my boy' when you do something he particularly likes; really emphasizing the whole daddy thing. Don't think about it too much.

If your not into the whole daddy thing, Adam just likes authoritative names in general. So you can call him names like captain or sir to rile him up as well.

Adam also secretly has a softspot for being called gentle things like sweetie, love, or just sweetheart. He will probably never be able to actually verbalize how it affects him. But you can tell by how the mood shifts during sex when you use one of them. How his eyes glaze over and his blush deepens before he pulls your bodies flush together. Adam leaves room for nothing else in between you two as he hugs you impossibly close.

Adam praises alot in the bedroom but not in a... conventional way. Yeah, he does call you things like beautiful or gorgeous; but Adam much more frequently calls you things like vixen, temptress, or seductress. Things that still call you hella sexy, but have a hint of misogyny to them. Things that imply he couldn't resist or say no to you even if he tried.

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Angel Dust ₊˚ ‿︵୨୧

What He Calls You

Angel is a oddball. He doesn't really know what to do when he actually catches feelings for someone. Angel's default mode is flirt mode. So... what else is there?

Because of this, Angel Dust is kind of a dumbass at first. Yeah, he gives petnames to everyone. Except you. Angel will use every name under the sun for everyone else. But when it comes to you, your just your name. Sometimes your straight up full name. Its stiff. Its awkward. And it makes everybody uncomfortable.

Angel just wants to make sure you know your different. That he wants more then just sex. He wants you. Angel doesn't want to be seen as just the ""sex freak"" by you.

You'll probably have to suggest a petname for Angel to use. He will go along with most names as long as they aren't overtly sexual. Like I said before, he is being careful to establish this as a more then sex thing.

However, whatever name you suggest will come out of Angel's mouth just as stiffly and awkwardly as your actual name does. Angel very much sounds like one of Voxtech's robots when he uses it.

Its best if you give Angel some time to loosen up so he can come up with a petname organically. It'll take a few months of dating at least before Angel stops being so stiff and calms down.

Once he settles in, Angel only uses soft names for you. He will probably start with doll since its the most familiar to him. Then he will start sprinkling in a honey or hun...

Quickly Angel settles in and has a healthy repertoire of names for you. Your mainly hun, sugar, or darlin'. Honey has now become the name Angel uses for you when he needs something or is nervous (you know exactly the tone I'm talking about). The name doll has also now moved to only being used when Angel is in a more playful mood or the two of you are joking around.

What You Call Him

Angel is used to being called every single raunchy name in the book. So honestly? You could go that direction if you really wanted to and it wouldn't phase him.

However. What really makes Angel's knees buckle and gives him butterflies is if you use cute, soft names on him. Now that he isn't used to. Things like sweetie or precious completely throw Angel Dust for a loop. He doesn't know how to react so he just ends up giggling like an idiot.

Instead of calling him sexy or sweet legs or whatever. Call him cutie. Angel has to start laughing to hide his blush when you first use it. Then he snidely tells you 'cute' isnt a word usually associated with him. Everytime you call him it though, Angel gets the dumbest smile on his face.

More creative names like pinkie or Pinkie Pie (because he is pink and loves to PAR-TAY); sprinkles (for the spots on his face); fuzzy, fluffy, or fuzzles (because he is so soft and fluffy ! !); anything along those lines are deeply appreciated by the spider. Angel will wear these names with pride and will even use them when referring to himself.

While the creative names are Angel's favorite to brandish, they don't send him reeling like the soft ones do. So pick your poison on that one.

Angel's favorite name by far though, is when you call him lovebug. That one, is like, a perfect mix of the two categories. He always gets such a huge smile when you say it and its his favorite to use for himself. Angel will come home and be like, "Your lovebug is baaackk~"

NSFW Section

Angel tends to be fun, relaxed, and making lots of jokes during sex. I mean, come on. The spider literally has sex as his job, the last thing he wants to do is be serious when he does it for actual fun.

So you two have lots of sarcastic and corny names for eachother. You still call Angel your lovebug in the bedroom, but you also joke about how much of a superstar he is. How your superstar has to show off and one-up you in the bedroom constantly.

Also, if we are being completely honest here, Angel Dust just likes it when you call him Angel. He is so used to hearing his name growled, moaned, or pleaded during shoots by people he barely even knows that its lost its meaning at this point. He has grown completely desensitized to his own name.

But hearing his name come from your mouth, drip in ecstasy from the lips of someone he actually cares about? It makes Angel care about his name again. Angel wants to hear you shout and scream his name. Something he hasn't actually wanted in god knows how long.

Angel tends to lean more towards calling you darlin' and sugar when you two are in the heat of things. Especially the latter. Mostly because he likes to joke about how sweet you are and taste, so much so that you must be made of sugar.

When the tease dial get turned up really high, Angel starts calling you pookie or schnookums. He especially like to call you this in a baby voice while he is edging you, has you tied up, or has your arms pinned with two of his while his other two hands squish at your face lovingly. Its just Angel's way of saying your in for a wild ride~

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Husk ₊˚ ‿︵୨୧

What He Calls You

The old man defaults to what he knows: Doll. Its classic, sweet, not too raunchy, and gender neutral! Perfect, jack of all trades petname. So your his doll. Full stop. If he is feeling particularly bold, he might change it to dollface. Oooooo, how adventurous!

But seriously. Its nearly always one of those two names. At least, when he is sober. You can actually tell how drunk Husk is by what names he uses for you. Sometimes the name he uses gives his mood away too.

If Husk is buzzed and in a good mood or feeling playful, your suddenly his darlin'. Emphasis on the lack of a 'G' there. This one sounds particularly good when he is drinking because he slurs it. The end of it just hangs and drags. The more playful he is, the more emphasis he will put on it too.

Husk goes back to his good ol' safename of doll if he isn't feeling too good or things are tense. However, if he actually gets upset, frazzled, or is trying to get your attention, a dolly may slip out. This is always like a weird reset button because when it slips, Husk gets so embarrassed that he just used that name for you and lowkey wants to die ohmygod.

See, the key here is Husk is still sober enough to still have shame. He is still self-aware and capable of embarrassment. However....

You have no idea where this comes from. It almost made you choke the first time you heard it. But when Husk is wasted he calls you his sugarpie. He says it with the sweetest, most chipper voice too; its absolutely surreal.

Its extra hilarious, because if you ask him to 'be serious' when he is wasted or he otherwise gets upset, Husk changes to the much more serious name of... sweetpea. Yeah. Because sweetpea has a much more serious tone. ◔_◔

Of course, when Husk uses these names, he is so far into the bottle that his shame has been completely drowned. He finds your flustered reactions absolutely adorable and his tail flicks back and forth playfully while he teases you. Or Husk is calling you sweetpea with his fur spiked and ears flattened back. Either way its hilarious.

What You Call Him

Husk is surprisingly hard to please when it comes to petnames. You either get no reaction or a negative one. Being a barkeep, Husk is probably just desensitized to being called everything because he is used to dealing with drunk people 24/7.

Hard no's are anything super sexual or things making fun of his demon appearance. So no names like wings, lovebird, or joker. He has grown to especially hate names that have anything to do with cats because of people like Alastor and Mimzy who like to use those kind of names as a way to demean him. So nothing like tom cat, kitty, or kitten either. None of that nonsense.

Other then that, Husk is pretty free game on what you call him. There are a couple notable exceptions though...

The first time you call Husk your babe or baby he is shocked and almost chokes on his drink. He has been called that before but... he didn't expect to actually like it coming from you.

After that, Husk always gets a genuine smile on his face and chuckles when you use the name. He never thought he would be someone's baby and enjoying it. But hey, life is weird sometimes.

Husk will roll his eyes and laugh if you call him daddy. He gives you one of those 'really? Your doing this?' looks, but he doesn't actually object to it. In fact, if you continue to call Husk your daddy, he will start playing along with it too.

You honestly don't know if he actually likes it and is into it; or if Husk finds the weirded out reactions people give you two utterly hilarious and just plays along for that.

NSFW Section

Husk is also pretty laissez-faire when it comes to the bedroom. He doesn't really care too much what you call him. As long as there are no cat based names.

Even if your whole daddy game escalates to the bedroom, Husk doesn't care. Again, he will give a disbelieving laugh before he starts playing along. After all, if it gets his baby off, who is he to complain?

Husk tends to take his time and be gentle in the bedroom. He has learned from experience how fast things can change, so he wants to savor you. To enjoy everything you have to offer and memorize every inch of your body in case he never gets to see it again.

But on the off chance you two are pent up or your going at it particularly hard that night, a well timed sir can decimate this man. Husk will go absolutely feral and fuck you into the wall.

You do have to be careful with this though. Because the name carries alot of baggage from Husk's overlord days. Using the name is a big gamble. If you mistime it or use it when the mood isn't right, you can send Husk spiraling into a depressed state instead.

Husk himself tends to use more saccharine names when you two have sex. He likes to use sugar, sweetie, or the infamous sweetpea. Like I said before, Husk wants to enjoy you to the fullest, and that includes expressing how much he cares about you when it counts.

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FURTHER READING ₊˚ ‿︵୨୧

Since I'm going on hiatus, Im just gonna suggest some great Hazbin writers to yall! You should read everything by them in the gap~

@writteninlunarlight-years, her masterlist can be found >>HERE<<

@greenandsorrow, their masterlist can be found >>HERE<<

@nayomi247, her masterlist can be found >>HERE<<

@qu1cks1lversb1tch, her masterlist can be found >>HERE<<

Also just a big shoutout to @shae-mermaid and @kittycatkandies for being absolute sweeties and encouraging me on my blog ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

(づ๑•ᴗ•๑)づ♡ love you all

Taglist: @millie-the-goth @idk-dude46 @tayraedoll @the-screams-of-the-damned

[beefscrap]

I say “maybe someday” but I get scared someday never will come. So I’ll be brave and speak

“A dream come true” is a phrase I’ve said here before, but that doesn’t even graze the surface. I’ve been writing stories and drawing since I was very young. It’s all I’ve ever done. And for years, one of my biggest wishes was to collect a fanbase for at least one of my stories. Calling my followers a “fanbase” seems really intense, though. I hesitate to call my readers a fanbase because I don’t feel I deserve it. “Fanbase” feels like it’s for someone who made something AMAZING.

I started making TBoFS at the beginning of this year. I’d work on it whenever I got sad, and it turned out to be often. It was just for fun, and something to escape to. Every time I make a story I think to myself ‘I’m sure it’ll pass’, because they usually do. It’s hard for me to finish things in general. So, I thought nothing much would come of it. I never would’ve imagined it’d get as much attention as it does.

No, maybe it’s not a LOT. No way in hell I’d call myself popular, or anything CLOSE. But there are people now who comment, react, interact, theorize, make art, etc for this story. I’ve never felt so special. I never felt like anything I’ve done ended up with any significance. Even if it’s a small amount compared to other online creators, I feel like I have a fanbase. If it’s not considered one, I don’t care. To me it’s one of the biggest, most important things that happened to me. If you couldn’t tell I was dramatic before, you’re finding out now!

I started with low hopes and just made shit for fun. This doesn’t even feel like a very GOOD story half the time because it was so casual at the start. Like, what am I doing to deserve what I have?

I still come to this story and these characters when I’m sad. This year was rough. The people here have helped. And I have a little bit of hope now that someday I can make something totally my own that people will like. That’s always been the dream. But THIS is more than enough.

I’m so lucky to have people who care here. And I thank the people who cared when it was only just beginning, too

I’m not gonna add tags or anything cuz I feel annoying and am a little embarrassed 😭 if you see and read this then hopefully it wasn’t too weird

[thehereticdiaries]

Into the Wonderland: Chapter Four

Chapter Summary: I'm building plot, it's cute and y/n actually gets a break for once. San's a menace and the alphas are horny bastards but nothing sexual happens YET

Warnings: not much, they talk briefly about kinks and bedroom dynamics but nothing explicit

Series Masterlist

You woke up the next morning later than normal. Thankfully, it was Saturday, which meant no classes to worry about for the next two days. You blinked the remnants of sleep from your eyes, looking up to see Hongjoong awake and scrolling on his phone. You rested your chin on his chest to admire his bedhead while he was still distracted. You only got a moment, though, since he felt you move when you woke up.

“Morning, did you sleep any better last night?” His raspy morning voice sent a shiver down your spine.

“Mhm,” you hid your face in his neck. “No nightmares for the first time in weeks.” 

“Good.” He kissed the top of your head, patting your hip afterward so he could get out of bed. “We should get back to the dorms. The others are worried since I didn’t come back last night.”

“You didn’t tell them?” You sat up and watched him make his way to your bathroom.

“Nope!” You rolled your eyes, checking your notifications before getting up to get dressed. You finished changing just before Hongjoong exited the bathroom. “You ready to go?”

“Actually, I remembered a couple things I wanted to talk to you about. I kinda forgot after doing the pack bond.” He sat next to you on your bed with one hand on your knee. “Okay, my first idea has to do with my apartment. I’m not sure if Mingi told you, but my grandmother gifted it to me. I’m not willing to sell it.”

“I wasn’t expecting you to,” Hongjoong’s eyebrows creased, prompting you to continue.

“Well, I was thinking that since I’m eventually going to move into the dorms with you all,” you didn’t miss the way he sat up straighter at the idea. “We could use my apartment as, like, an extra space for our heats and ruts. Just in case any of us want more privacy.”

“We can talk about it with the rest of the pack when we get back, but I think that’s a great idea,” Hongjoong agreed, tracing circles on your knee.

“The second thing has to do with what me, Seonghwa, and Yeosang discussed back when I first joined. We had a long conversation about our heats and how we handle them and who we handle them with and –”

“Y/N,” he interrupted your rambling. “It’s okay, you can just tell me.”

“I’mstillavirgin,” you muttered way too quickly. He stared at you with one eyebrow raised, silently asking you to repeat yourself. You took a deep breath. Honestly, you didn’t know why you were so nervous to tell him when it was so easy to talk about with the other omegas. “I am still a virgin.” The silence that followed made you anxious, only getting worse when Hongjoong closed his eyes and counted to ten.

“Okay!” He sounded almost too chipper. “That’s fine, no problem.”

“Riiiiiight,” you trailed off, baffled by his reaction. “Uh, that’s everything. We can go back to the dorms now.” You stood, grabbing your backpack and his laptop bag then leaving your apartment.

You and Hongjoong walked into an empty living room. He set both of your bags down, then wrapped his arms around your shoulders from behind, effectively hiding your new mark. He covered your ears.

“Everyone in the living room!” He shouted and immediately footsteps approached from all over the dorm. His hands dropped back down to their original spot on your shoulders. One by one, the other pack members filed into the living room. No one sat, too on edge from the head alpha’s disappearance last night.

“Care to explain why you never came back last night?” Seonghwa questioned with a hand on his hip. 

“I’m sure most, if not all of you, have noticed how tired Y/N has been.” Everyone nodded and you hid behind Hongjoong’s arms. You thought you were hiding your exhaustion pretty well. “Our precious little omega has been having nightmares because of her piece of shit classmate.”

“What? Why didn’t you tell us?” Seonghwa’s voice filled with concern as he stepped forward to run a hand through your hair.

“I thought I could handle it, that they’d go away on their own,” you admitted softly, looking up at your elder omega through your lashes. 

“That’s why I didn’t come back last night. We’re not going to let her sleep alone, whether she’s over here or one of us is at her apartment.” Hongjoong flicked his eyes across each of his pack members. He smiled fondly when they all agreed with no hesitation. “How about some good news?” He stepped back, letting his arms fall from you to his sides. You were instantly crowded by the betas and omegas of the group, with San and Jongho lingering a tiny bit further away. 

“Yes! Holy shit, you’re officially ours, dollface,” Wooyoung laughed and ran his fingers over your new mark. Seonghwa swatted his hand away.

“Don’t touch it! It’s still healing,” he scolded the younger beta. Wooyoung held his hands up in surrender.

“Okay, okay, jeez.” San rested his chin on Wooyoung’s head to get a better view of your neck. You blushed under all of the attention. In the opposite corner of the room, Hongjoong whispered to Mingi and Yunho. They not-so-subtly glanced over to you every so often. Curiosity got the better of you, and you wormed your way out of the doting hands of Yeosang and Seonghwa. 

“What are we talking about?” You inserted yourself between Hongjoong and Yunho, the latter slinging an arm over your shoulders.

“Hongjoong was just telling us that you asked him to be there for your heat,” Mingi started with a sly grin.

“And that you want his claim during it,” Yunho concluded. You scrunched your eyebrows at them.

“Yeah? I think that’s pretty normal, so why are you guys acting weird?” You looked between the two taller alphas.

“I’m just warning you now: I don’t think either of us will be patient enough to wait until your next heat to add our own claiming marks,” Mingi stated with a shrug. You hummed and leaned into Yunho’s side.

“I wasn’t really expecting you to with how far apart my heats are.”

“What do you mean?” Hongjoong turned your head to him by your chin. 

“Seonghwa and Yeosang didn’t tell you? I’m on a suppressant that pushes them to every three months,” you explained.

“Is that healthy? Why do you need them, anyway?” Yunho asked next, trailing his fingers over your bicep.

“I need them because my heats were excruciatingly painful. Yes, they’re completely safe. The only side effect I really have basically took the pain and turned it to neediness,” you snickered at your attempt at a joke. No one else laughed. In fact, Yunho tensed at your side and Hongjoong had to close his eyes for a few deep breaths again. You looked at Mingi, but he was faring no better, covering his mouth with his hand.

“Okay!” Hongjoong had the same overly chipper tone as earlier that morning. “Thank you for telling us. I gotta go work on that mix more, see you in a bit.” He pecked your forehead then practically sprinted down the hallway, laptop bag in hand. The other two alphas left with similar excuses, leaving you alone in the living room. You were once again baffled by their reactions, and it must have shown on your face.

“Everything alright?” San asked as he re-entered the room. You sat on the couch with a huff. The beta set his gym bag on the counter then took the seat next to you.

“Yeah, I’m just confused, is all.” He arched his brow, gesturing for you to continue. “I’m confused with the way Hongjoong, Yunho, and Mingi reacted to something I said. This morning I told Hongjoong that I’ve never had sex, then just now I told the three of them about my heat suppressants and the way it makes me super needy. All three of them got really quiet and really tense. They’re not upset, are they?”

“Nope,” San managed to say between his giggles. “I promise they’re not mad. They were probably just trying to keep themselves in check.”

“What do you mean?”

“Honey, our pack is entirely doms and switches. Hongjoong has a huge corruption kink. Him, Yunho, and Mingi were holding themselves back from jumping your bones right then and there.” Your jaw dropped at his bluntness. This was interesting.

“Oh, you have to tell me more,” you insisted while poking his ribs. He laughed, gently pushing your hand away.

“Ah-ah, that’s gonna be something you have to discuss with everyone individually.” San checked his watch. “I gotta meet Changbin at the gym soon.” He stood to grab his bag, but paused to smirk at you. “I can give you a hint, though.”

“Yes! Tell me.” San leaned over you, bracing himself on the couch on either side of your head, effectively caging you in.

“Our alphas and your fellow omegas are all mean.” Your breath hitched, both at his proximity and his admission, red coating your cheeks and ears.

“What about you?” 

“Me? I’m one of the nice ones.” He pressed a quick kiss to your lips then walked out the door like nothing happened. You gawked at the front door until someone cleared their throat from the hallway. Wooyoung leaned against the wall, arms crossed over his chest.

“Does he always do that?” You pointed in the direction San went in, assuming he heard enough to know what you were talking about.

“Oh, yes. San is too patient for his own good. He’ll tease you for days just to see you get riled up and desperate for him,” Wooyoung wiggled his eyebrows at you. 

“And he says he’s a nice one,” you scoffed, fanning your heated face with your hands. 

“He is, trust me.” With a wink, Wooyoung disappeared back down the hall. You shook your head, no less confused than you were 10 minutes ago. Jongho and Seonghwa passed through the room as you pulled your book out of your backpack. The latter grabbed a list off the fridge, meeting up with Yunho and leaving the dorm. The youngest pack member sat next to you, handing you a water bottle and draping your legs over his lap. You fell into a comfortable silence with the beta, each absorbed in your own activities while enjoying each other’s company.

The next day you woke up with Wooyoung practically on top of you. Last night when you left the dorm, he insisted on being the next one to stay at your apartment. You attempted to wiggle out from under him, making the beta whine in the back of his throat. He wrapped his arms tighter around your middle.

“Wooyoung, let go I have to pee,” you shoved his shoulder half-heartedly. He buried his nose in your hair, pointedly ignoring you. “Wooyoung.”

“Ugh, fine!” He reluctantly let you go so you could both get ready to go back to the dorms. You really need to figure out when you could move in, the back and forth was getting annoying. You barely had a chance to set your backpack on the couch when Yunho grabbed your hand and pulled you right back out the door.

“Yunho, where are we going? I wanted to work on my code,” you complained but didn’t fight him, easily letting him lead you outside where Hongjoong and Mingi waited.

“We,” he started, gesturing between himself and the other alphas. “Are taking you on a date.”

“What?! Why didn’t you tell me, I would’ve dressed nicer!” You looked down at your sweater and jeans.

“You look great, come on,” Hongjoong took your other hand, lacing your fingers together. You walked between the two with Mingi right behind you. It almost felt like you had bodyguards. They guided you through the subway and a short walk later you stared wide-eyed in the lobby of the Seoul Science Center. You, Yunho, and Mingi waited off to the side while Hongjoong got your tickets.

“I’ve never been here,” you grinned while looking through a pamphlet detailing the exhibits. 

“Really? That’s surprising, considering your field of study,” Yunho commented, accepting his ticket when Hongjoong held it out to him. 

For the next couple hours, your alphas followed behind you, listening intently as you gushed over the displays. You were happy to explain anything they didn’t understand and looking up the things that none of you knew. At one point you got stuck trying to figure out how to start a demonstration. You futzed around with the damn thing for nearly fifteen minutes before giving up. A young girl and her father came up beside your group. The girl was maybe ten-years-old at most, but she activated the demo in about three seconds. You collectively decided to browse the gift shop after that.

It was late in the afternoon when you returned to the dorms. You went to collapse onto the couch, groaning dramatically at Mingi pulling you into the kitchen to place you on the counter and stand between your legs.

“You’re letting them get away with too much,” Seonghwa remarked on his way into the living room. “Remember to share. You guys have had her all day.”

“Five more minutes, then she’s all yours,” Hongjoong responded as he and Yunho joined the two of you. 

“Any reason why I’m still being held hostage?” You raised an eyebrow at them.

“Kiss,” was the only explanation you got before Mingi dipped down to connect his lips to yours. One hand held the back of your neck, the other resting on the counter next to your thigh. His tongue slipped into your mouth, running along yours before pulling away with a light nip to your bottom lip. Satisfied with your dazed expression, Mingi gave you another quick kiss then left so Yunho could take his place.

“Did you have fun today?” He cupped your cheek with one hand, brushing his thumb over the flushed skin. You nodded rapidly, pressing your forehead to his. “Good.” The force of his kiss contrasted the gentle touches he trailed across your neck and hip. He licked into your mouth, guiding your tongue to his so he could suck on it. A string of saliva connected you when he pulled back to kiss down your jaw and neck. Hongjoong growled in warning when Yunho got too close to your mating gland. The younger alpha rolled his eyes, shooting you a wink before following Mingi’s path further into the dorms.

“Don’t be mean,” you tried to scold Hongjoong but your smile took the sting out of it. He pressed himself into you, pulling your legs to wrap around his waist.

“Oh, you haven’t seen mean yet, babe,” he smirked, eyes intense and lips ghosting over yours. You inhaled sharply to suppress the whimper that threatened to escape your throat. His mouth devoured yours, all tongue and teeth. Hongjoong’s self-restraint frayed at the edges as he allowed himself to roll his hips against yours once, just to hear your tiny moan. He tore himself away from you, leaning closer to your ear.

“I need to stop it here, my pretty omega. Or I’m gonna end up fucking you on the counter,” his voice sent a shiver through your body. 

“W-why can’t you?” You stammered and scratched his scalp at the base of his neck. He sent you a warning look that only succeeded at sending a rush of heat to your lower belly.

“The first time I fuck you is going to be during your heat,” he stated firmly. 

“But why?” Your whine was cut off by Hongjoong gripping your jaw. 

“Don’t argue. You should know this, sweetheart. We produce the strongest bond that way. Understand?” You pouted, but nodded against his hold. His eyes softened immediately. “Good girl. Go give some love to the others.” You tried to keep the praise from going to your head while he lifted you off the counter. At the doorway of the kitchen, Hongjoong steered you to the living room with a pat to your backside. 

“Finally!” Seonghwa quipped, pulling you to sit on his lap when you were close enough. His arms draped lazily around your waist. Yeosang scooted closer to maneuver your legs over his lap, resting his head on the eldest’s shoulder. “Are you staying here tonight or going back to your apartment?”

“As much as I’d like to stay here, all of my school stuff is back at mine. We gotta figure out when I can move in, and what room I’d be moving into,” you noted offhandedly. 

“Hmm, your heat’s in two weeks. Do you want to wait until after to talk about it with everyone?” Yeosang suggested.

“Yeah, that sounds good,” you agreed and relaxed into Seonghwa’s chest to watch a movie that Jongho put on. After dinner, you and San returned to your apartment. You fell asleep that night tucked safely under the beta’s chin.

Permanent Taglist: @furfoxsake22 @babygirlskz98 @miniverse-zen @holly-here @corgilover20 @eastjonowhere @bookswillfindyouaway

Series Taglist: @popcatx0 @m00njinnie @awkward-fucking-thing @fr34k4c1dr41n @nchhuhi @pixie0627

[rhiannonsknife]

I'm sick :( I need Rhiannon to comfort me fr

oh no, get well soon anon!! here are some rhiannon hcs for you <3

rhiannon who becomes your personal nurse and care taker.

if you thought she was protective before, you wouldn’t believe how she gets when you’re getting sick. rhiannon might not seem like the nurturing type at first glance but that whole facade cracks the moment she notices you’re coming down with something. suddenly, her focus narrows entirely on you, her usual edge softened by concern. turns out she’s almost oddly skilled at taking care of you, probably because of all the years spent cleaning up her own messes (or other people’s…) she knows exactly where to find the thermometer, has a bottle of cough syrup in her cupboard that she swears isn’t expired, and somehow remembers all the proper doses of medicine off the top of her head. “here, take this” and with that she’ll press the pills into your hand, a glass of water already in the other. when you raise an eyebrow at her efficiency, rhiannon shrugs. “what, you think this is my first time playing nurse?”

rhiannon who works from home whenever you’re sick so that she can be there for you.

she stays with you all day, restocks your tissues, binge watches all your favorite shows with you on the couch, or goes on a pharmacy run without being asked, returning with a bag full of remedies. “alright, i got cold medicine, cough drops, and this weird herbal tea…pick your poison,” she says, dumping the haul on the coffee table. later, when you start to drift off, your head heavy against her shoulder, she goes quiet as she adjusts the blanket over you. “you’re lucky you’re sick,” she murmurs, almost too quiet for you to hear. “otherwise, i’d never let you get away with this” she pretends to be annoyed by all the caregiving, but she’s secretly touched when you lean on her.

rhiannon, who’s surprisingly patient with you. 

she’s usually the type to lose her temper quickly. rhiannon’s the type to lose her shit over the smallest things (a lost phone charger, slow wi-fi, an overcooked meal…) but now, even when you’re grumbling or too exhausted to answer her properly, she doesn’t snap. no one else but you would ever get away with that. instead, she surprises even herself by being uncharacteristically calm. she doesn’t push you to eat or drink more than you can manage, but she’ll gently remind you to take your medicine on time and always has an eye on you from across the room. “think you can handle some tea?” she’ll ask gently as she sits down on the couch beside you. “or maybe just a sip of water? here, i’ll help”

rhiannon, who’s more affectionate with you than she’d ever admit around anyone else.

when it’s just the two of you, her carefully practiced guard drops completely. it’s always like this, but she enjoys it even more when she gets to care for you simultaneously. she’ll brush your hair out of your face, tuck the blankets around you, and sit by your side quietly. “your hair’s a mess,” she murmurs, her fingers ghosting over your forehead. “want me to run you a bath?” when you hum a quiet yes, her hand lingers for a moment before she stands. “alright,” she says softly, glancing at you like she’s making sure you’re still comfortable before she heads toward the bathroom. “you stay put. don’t even think about moving until i come get you!”

rhiannon, who’s even more protective over you when you’re sick.

if anyone tries to disturb you or suggest you should “power through” your illness, rhiannon will shut them down if given the chance. “she’s resting” she’ll say if someone makes a comment like: “oh, it’s just a little cold! she’ll be fine,” “unless you’re a doctor or a pharmacist, kindly mind your own business!” then she’ll turn back to you, all soft concern again. “you’re not moving an inch! don’t let anyone tell you otherwise” even when you start feeling better, she’s still overly cautious. the first time you try to suggest going out or doing something mildly active, she immediately talks you out of it: “no. you’re staying in. i didn’t spend all week playing nurse just for you to keel over the second you step outside!” “but i feel fine,” you protest weakly. “right” she deadpans, pulling the blanket tighter around your shoulders. “face it, you’re stuck with me, and i’m not letting you undo all my hard work!”

rhiannon, who will absolutely guilt trip you once you’re feeling better.

once you’re fully recovered, she milks her role as the “long-suffering girlfriend” for all it’s worth, sighing dramatically every time you ask her for even the smallest favor. “oh, you need me to grab the remote for you now?” sure, because i didn’t just spend days making sure you didn’t die of the plague” you can’t help but chuckle a little. but if you dare roll your eyes, she’ll double down with an exaggerated groan. “oh, you’re denying it now? fine, i’ll keep a list next time you’re sick. medicine at 3am? check. homemade soup? check. listening to you snore like a bloody chainsaw? double check” but, as much as she’s pretending like it was such an inconvenience, you both know rhiannon loves to take care of you!! <3

[kacchanrawr]

mha final volume spoilers

For the past few months I've kinda just come to accept MHA's ending to be whatever. Not the best, but not the worst I've seen it's fine whatever. But seeing the final volume extra content honestly just has me genuinely hating the ending. I'm trying to keep an open mind cuz it's not officially out yet and leaks can be kinda dubious, but I'm genuinely so upset.

Ig the main feeling I have is: genuinely what's the point??? I mean there's a lot of things going on in mha and depending on what you care about ig you could feel like everything's fine and resolved, but personally? Just no. My main problem a few months ago was with Toga's death, but now I'm just even more pissed.

As so many people have probably already discussed: killing the villains off after all this stuff about saving them is a fucking problem right?? With Toga's case specifically (cuz she's my fave and I care the most about her), it's her just dying after she finally found the love and acceptance she's always wanted from Ochako. Like why? Even if you can technically make sense of it with her explanation of "I want to live life as I please", it's just stupid and distasteful. It would be one thing if she said that cuz she was just running away to be free, but to kill her? Of bloodloss of all things? Idc abt people going oh thats sooo poetic, no i think it's stupid. So many other characters have lived after going through worse like for fuck's sake, Edgeshot's still around.

What's the point of that emotional resolution if you don't show the aftermath, of her being able to live happily, or at least how she'll go on with life from then on? She didn't have to die, she could've just escaped or whatever (I was hoping that was the case when there was no mention of Toga's body). But by killing her, the only message I got from mha's whole saving the villains thing is: "sooo maybe having empathy for the deviances of society is important actually, but it's kinda inconvenient to deal with them." And even if that wasn't Hori's exact intention, that's what his story seems to be saying by killing off the villains.

And then the fucking nail in the coffin is the fact that Hori used Toga's death to drive Izuocha. It was one thing when he did it with the cliff talk when Ochako was mourning Toga (I always found it distasteful okay), but it's so much worse to write Toga literally pushing Ochako to Deku. So not only did Hori kill off the queer character who finally had her resolution and romance so he won't have to deal with her, but he's really following through with the Bury the Gays trope by using her o push the girl she loves to a man? Ew.

The worst part is that even if Izuocha got together and they're canon or whatever cuz of that last part, the way Hori did it is so fucking mid. Like seriously, if you were gonna do my girl dirty like that for that het romance, at least make it good?? But noooo. I mean they don't have to be like kissing and getting married and having babies or whatever (that'd just be shit), but at least have them properly get together. What is that "implied romance" ass handshake?? There's no fucking reason to make it implied, they're not queer or forbidden or complicated or anything. Bro just didn't wanna commit to actually fleshing out their romance. And you used Toga and her death for that, for absolutely fucking nothing?? The funniest part is that everything Togachako did is infinitely more romantic than that handshake, so how am I supposed to be convinced by this "implied romance"? (anyone who says implications enough for izuocha I'd say the bar's just on the floor for you cuz they're het)

And then there's Bakugo. I mean I was fine and whatever with the original epilogue, but what the fuck? So you're telling me bro lead Project Deku Hero Suit or whatever for 8 years, only for Deku to reject him when asked to be a part of his agency? It may or may not have been explicitly stated that they'd be in a hero agency together whatever, but I feel like it was a natural conclusion that they'd end up working together/closely as a hero duo? Win to save and save to win, wonder duo defeating ShigAFO together, that hospital talk about competing together for the rest of their lives, him being the one to reach out to Deku at the epilogue chapter, hello? DEKU REJECTED THAT AND FOR WHAT. Also ok fine this may sound stupid to be upset over, but why the fuck is Bakugo rank 15. Like we do just be writing whatever I guess

I'm still holding on to some hope that the leaks were ass and inaccurate. Or maybe even completely fake cuz the chapter's been getting a lot of AI art allegations? Though it's also probable that's just the leaker who used AI to get high res pictures of the leaks. IDK MAN JUST PLEASE DON'T LET THIS BE COMPLETELY ACCURATE PLEASE LET ME STAND CORRECTED

[luv-byers]

I think some ppl forget that byler not being endgame would be the greatest waste of time EVER, specially for Will’s arc. Now let me explain.

Ofc Will is one of the most (if not the most) complex character of the show, his connection to the upside down is essential for the plot and in s5 we’ll discover many more things. His character is not defined by his sexuality only, ofc, but it is an important thing, specifically if we’re talking about the 80’s. Which leads us to the main point of this post: his love interest.

Him being the only character who hasn’t had any love interest/crush, or that actually avoids talking about love is something that they remind us every season.

S1: didn’t care that the pretty girl (don’t remember her name srry) was crying at his funeral.

- also, foreshadowing that he might be gay (lonnie called him slurs, the bullies at school doing the same…)

S2: he didn’t want to dance with the girl at the SB

S3: “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls” “i’m not gonna fall in love…”

S4: “i think there’s someone he likes”

But we never get an actual answer. What we expect at the end of the show is seeing him with someone, to be in love, to show that he can also find someone to love just like everyone.

Him being gay adds more depth to his character, bc now we know why he wasn’t interested in girls at all, and also why he’s so scared to fall in love: bc it would be with a man, and he knows he wouldn’t be accepted.

The Duffers choosing Mike to be not only his love interest, but THE ONLY ONE, is a wild take. It’s not a simple crush.. it’s pure LOVE, he’s been in love for years. They could’ve chosen anyone, ANYONE, but they wanted Mike to play that part. Now tell me, why would they do that if it would be a simple “no, i dont like u back lmao, i care ab my gf” at the end? Why would they choose to waste 1 out of the 2 queer characters’ love story?

“It’s so vecna has something to torment him with” that’s one of the most stupid shit i’ve ever heard.

Vecna has plenty of things to torment him with: his ab*siv3 dad, the bullying he’s dealt with since he was a kid, everything he went through in the UD, him being gay, etc etc

They could’ve kept it platonic: will doesn’t want vecna to “tell” mike he’s gay bc that’s his best friend and he doesn’t want him to hate him for that. Or simply ANYONE ELSE. Mike didn’t have to be part of that trauma yk.

They could’ve added a character to be his love interest, maybe in s3, then a little scene with him in s4 to remind us that he’ll be present in s5 and then that’s it, happy ending.

Why did they choose to write mileven in such a poor way compared to other canon ships in the show, and on the other hand give us emotional, tender and intimate moments with byler if they didn’t intend to make them endgame?

When you make scenes be so easily misinterpreted you are not being clear. If mileven was clearly endgame there would be no “ship war”, bc it would be obvious. The reason why there are plenty of analysis and byler proof is bc they wanted us to notice those things. Bc guess what: if we have proof is bc there is something to prove.

They would’ve avoided any type of hint that could lead us to believe that Mike could be in love with him as well, or that he’s very queer coded.

Things like “the closet” (official soundtrack), the one way sign, him looking at will’s lips constantly, and other things, all that would be GONE.

Plus, they would wanna promote mileven and make us believe that they are THE main couple. For example, that final take? Why tf are will and mike together, alongside with other two canon couples, and then El at the front? Why isn’t Mike with her? They will defeat the evil with the power of love, right? They’ll be the powerful couple of the show… right? Doesn’t seem like it.

If Will gets rejected, not only everything they’ve been building since the beginning will be for absolutely NOTHING, but also things will be even WORSE than before.

Will, after getting rejected by Mike, will not be able to even look at him in the eyes. Not only he got rejected, not only Mike is his best friend, but also he’s a BOY. So, not only he confessed his feelings which “are not mutual” but also he just came out of the closet. How great is that? Even if they tried to play it cool afterwards I know that Will would be way too embarrassed to ignore it, so they would end up not talking to each other.

So not only they wasted a great part of Will’s character but also one of the main friendships of the show. All for what? To keep on going with mileven? To use a queer character’s feelings for their own good? After making so many people get bored of it or losing hope after season 4? After letting us see that she works better on herself without mike? What kind of shitty promo is this?

To sum up, byler/mike’s internalized homophobia would make Mike’s character even deeper and would explain some things that he’s done/said. If it wasn’t that and he was just being an idiot, then wow, they definitely nailed it……..

[panchulien]

So that using Price as leverage idea against Nik.

Would Nik’s captors also kidnap Price or simply just threaten to do so?

Would they keep Price somewhere separate so Nik couldn’t speak to him or would they just threaten to shoot Price in front of him?

When would Nik crack?

ooh it could go in a lot of ways and they're all so good i can't choose 😵‍💫

But, if you want Nikolai to break, let's go with both of them being captured. It's Nik they want, it's information that only he has. (C'mon, with the things that guy has been through, I'm sure SOMEONE out there wants this man dead/captured lol) So the only way to get to him is by Captain Price.

I think if they simply just "threatened" to harm Price while he's not there, Nikolai wouldn't budge. Its nothing new, he sees through their bluff, he knows by the time they get to John, John and the boys would already be alert. (seeing as Nikolai is missing)

Now, where to keep Price. I feel like it wouldn't be their first time dealing with something like this (being captured), and they both trust the others ability to make it out of there soon. That is, considering they're separate. Because John's also tough to crack, he wouldn't make it easy on them.

But put a bloody and bruised John Price in front of Nikolai, and that's when shit gets serious. This man has endured all sorts of torture before, but this is by far the worst. The one thing he values the most in this world, right there in front of him, being threatened.

Price knows this, he can't do anything about it but beg Nikolai not to say anything. There is too much on the line, too risky. He doesn't care what happens to him so long as the captors don't win. Maybe he can't speak, maybe he can, but he's still begging Nikolai not to say a word.

Nikolai on the other hand lost all rational thinking the moment they brought Price into the room. He can't think straight, his head is ringing, heart pounding. It breaks Prices heart to see the man in such a state. He's bruised up also, but the sheer look of terror on his face when Price enters the room is something he'll never forget. Nikolai is seething. How dare they take something so beautiful and ruin it. Nobody touches the Captain.

If he was by himself, he'd already be on his way home. But now he's got nothing. No escape plans, no tricks up his sleeve. There is Price's life on the line and his only hope is the 141 finding them soon. He doesn't doubt they're searching, he just prays they make it quick.

So.. he'd maybe resist at first. Coming back with smart replies, trying to negotiate. Eyes flickering between the men and Price, who's currently on the floor, blood dripping from his head. Trying to stall, just enough to not let anything out before the boys arrive. But each passing minute his hope wears thin, with each blow Price takes his heart stops. He can't do anything but watch. And when exactly does he break? The moment the muzzle touches Prices head, the world stops spinning.

For the first time since he arrived there, his tough guy act drops, his voice cracks as he shouts, "Wait... Please." Theres a click from the gun.

Price barely looks up at him, trying to stay focused and not pass out, voice hoarse as he whispers; "Nik.. Don't."

Nikolai's reasoning is long gone, he just begs them. "I'll tell you. I will! Just.. put the gun down."

Nikolai's tears stained face and horrified expression is the last thing Price sees before a gun hits the back of his head and knocks him out cold.

[asquinate]

In light of recent events I have only one thing to say to you all, *AHEM*

(spoilers ahead for the anime only enjoyers, best avoid this :])

Also bkdk thoughts ahead for my followers who don't care for it, I don't know how many there might be, but just to be safe and considerate to you,

IF YOU THOUGHT ONE PUNY CHAPTER WOULD BE ENOUGH TO STOP ME YOU'RE MORE DELUSIONAL THAN DUDEBRO TWT THINKS I AM. YOU CAN PRY BKDK FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS. CANON IS MY BITCH AND I DO WHAT I WANT. I DIDN'T SPEND THE LAST EIGHT MONTHS, NEARLY A YEAR, ENJOYING THESE TWO MORONS IN SO MANY DIFFERENT AUS, SCENARIOS, FICS AND FANARTS FOR SOMETHING AS WEAK AS ONE CANON CHAPTER TO STOP ME. THESE TWO LOSERS ARE MY DOPAMINE AND YOU CAN TRY TO PRY BKDK FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS, BUT I DOUBT EVEN THEN YOU'LL MANAGE IT.

anyway it's late and I'm being lols rn. But I just wanted to put my vibe out here bc I see a lot of ppl being depressed. And while I see why, I also want to put something else not depresso out there too. In the effort of being brief, I will not be stopping making Bkdk or MHA content. And it's not going to be cheating fics or stuff like that. It will be the same soft shit I signed up for. With my other fanon joys like the vestiges and dfo. It doesn't have to be canon for me to enjoy it. This blog will stay pretty consistent with how it has been for the past almost year now. MHA with an Izuku focus and a love for this ship. With other additions, so don't expect any changes from me. Other than more fics in the future. (The Bkdk big bang is coming out in the future as well so…😁). I may be slightly more vocal Abt my liking this ship but I feel like y'all could tell that b4 so?

‼️‼️I WILL be blocking haters or things that don't make me happy bc I'm here for a good time, not to be upset. I am avoiding TWT and all discord servers that I'm apart of that feature MHA for the time being. For my sanity and also watching everyone be sad is bad for my mental health and fandom is about the joys not the losses. At least for me. Also I'm really sorry to the people who feel like the joy they had from this fandom has been stolen from you. Your feelings are valid, but I'm not going to let the haters get another win from me. I hope you all are well and feel better if you're not.

Final notes: BKDK is still canon to me. Katsuki and Izuku are still my favs. 431 isn't real to me, idk what ur talking about? That's a non canon one shot for sure. Aus are my loves, and I won't let this bring me down. I'm actually vibing. Y'all the fics are so good. I may make a rec list fr. Many well wishes to you all, have a good day/night.