#I jumped ahead and did 1-4 and managed it very quickly so at least there's that

[inverse-problem]

was about to p-rank 1-3 and then the hideous mass was enraged and at a tiny fraction of its health bar but then I ran out of nailgun nails and panicked and died

[megaboy335]

Manga Portion below

Like last year I'm including a section about some of the manga I've read during the year. Two brand new legal manga apps appeared on the scene this year (launching on back to back days!), KManga from Kodansha and Viz Manga from Viz Manga. KManga is the worst manga service on the market right now. It is purposefully designed to make binge reading impossible while making you buy individual chapters. I would rather get the physical volumes. I've given up reading the current Kodansha series because I don't want to encourage that business model. It doesn’t help how stingy they are with free coins too. You can save enough coins to read 1 current chapter a week if you do the daily ads. In comparison, Viz Manga is a companion to Shonen Jump but for the Shogakugan titles. Seeing Shonen Snday series simlupublished is a dream come true. It follows the exact same model as the WSJ app. I’m aiming to catch up on several Sunday series in the coming year. On the Weekly Shonen Jump front, My Hero Academia and Jujutsu Kaisen will likely conclude in the coming year. That could potentially put Yozakura as the 2nd oldest title for a period of time. One Piece is the series I currently most look forward to every week. Oda is keeping the story super engaging with developments happening in Egghead and simultaneously around the world. Horikoshi's art is better than ever as My Hero Academia  inches ever closer to its climax. Undead Unluck and Yozakura both had performed protag switch ups quite seamlessly this year. Cipher Academy managed to survive for an entire year. My favorite new series of 2023 was Tenmaku Cinema as I already discussed here. Least favorite would be Nue’s Exorcist. Maybe I’m getting out of touch with younger readers. I also really like Martial Master Asumi and I hope Mamayuyu can find its audience before it's too late. Jump+ was a little more mixed in 2023. Yumeochi seemed like it had promise but feel off at 4 volumes with a dumb ending. Service Wars was one of my personal favorites for its chuunibyou energy and silly ideas, yet sadly failed to catch on. Beat & Motion has been a big surprise in terms of how it found its groove. Recent chapters have been especially good. PPPPPP’s Mapollo3 returned this year with an abstract Madoka inspired magical girl series. It’s certainly an interesting read. Mappollo is utilizing their unique style better than ever. I would say the best new series for me this year is Blooming Love. It's a rom-com following two creatives falling in love. Think a more mature version of Nagatoro. I fear for its long term future due to its rapid pacing lately, but I’ll enjoy it as long as I can. Kaijuu #8 might end in 2024 so that’s something to keep an eye on.

Looking ahead, there's plenty of exciting things on the horizon. I’ll be curious to see how the Blue Box anime performs. Akane Banashi is quickly aging up into anime announcement territory. Speaking of, I wonder what is taking Sakamoto Days so long to reveal its anime. That’s a series that will need the right team to be done justice. I hope the recent Nisekoi bunko editions is a sign of Komi Naoshi’s return in the coming year. Lastly, quick reviews of a few older titles I read this year. Spirit Circle - This manga comes from the famed Satoshi Mizukami who has published a wealth of manga. Spirit Circle is perhaps their most famous work next to Lucifer and The Biscuit Hammer. I just want to say this series is very worthy of the praise people give it. It was a rare pager turner for me. I wanted to see all of the main character's past lives and find out where this reincarnation story was going. It did not disappoint in the slightest. It's essentially like 6 mini stories about different characters who share a throughline with the plot. It came together so perfectly. Highly recommended! Urusei Yatsura - I don't think this manga has aged well, but Lum's legacy can not be understated. She is a revolutionary character whose dna lives on to this day. It was worth reading so I could say I did. If you can see the origins of modern harem/rom-com tropes then its worth a shot.

Flames of Recca - Unlike the last 2, Recca isn't a well known series on any level. However, sometimes it can be refreshing to read a by-the-books shonen from the 90s. Tournament arcs never fail to hook me. It was nice seeing what a popular shonen in a different magazine was like during that time period. Just a very solid series from start to finish. _______________________________________________________ I think 2024 is going to be a good year. Weekly Shonen Jump is on the verge of a generational change and there are numerous anime projects to look forward to. I hope Blue Box and  Magilumiere turn out well and I’ll be curious if the Kaijuu anime gives the manga a substantial sales boost. I’m not sure about 2024’s Precure based on the theming, but I can always be surprised.  Dragonball Daima in the fall will be interesting to see. There’s a lot to be excited about for 2024!

Mega’s Top 2023 Anime (and Manga) As another year comes to a close, its time to reflect on another batch of anime in the books. My year to year watching decline leveled off in 2023 due to a strong fall season. At the same time, manga is gradually going up with the increasing number of legal manga outlets. Below are my top 5 anime (and manga thoughts) for the year of 2023. There will be spoilers.

1) Soaring Sky Precure More often than not Precure always makes my list for top 5 anime of the year. It makes a huge difference for character growth and telling a complete story when there are 46-50 episodes to work with. Soaring Sky Precure marked the 20th anniversary entry for the franchise. In order to celebrate they did a number of "firsts'' to shake up the traditional set-up. To start with, blue and pink (Sora and Mashiro) had reversed roles this year. Blue was the lead who was also the outsider coming into the human world. Yellow (Tsubasa) was the first male cure to be featured in the main group. Ageha was the first adult cure. While Elle was the first baby character to attain cure status. The story this year was about the Undergu Empire trying to invade and destroy Skyland with the overarching theme being Heroes. Soaring Sky shows how heroes come in many forms and do not necessarily wear capes. Unfortunately, I think it's lacking somewhat in character writing. Ageha especially suffers from not having much to contribute. She’s simply there to say you are never too old to be precure (while being Elle’s babysitter). Similarly, Tsubasa seeing himself as a knight to Elle prevents the group from being equals. I think they wanted the central focus to be Sora and Mashiro as a callback to the original series. In terms of plot pacing, Soaring Sky really dropped the ball after cour 2 with Battamonda. There was a little arc for Elle to become a precure. Otherwise it saved the rest of the plot for the end. It was spinning its wheels through cour 3 and most of cour 4. (I swear this happens in precure all the time where there's a lot of dead space between getting the last member and the final battle). I think it was more noticeable here due to the absence of character arcs between plot beats. However, the likable characters make the individual episodes very enjoyable. The villains even got little characters arc through their battles with the cures. That’s something we don’t get every year. A bonus “first” was a handful of episodes without monsters. There was an adult sequel for the Yes 5 series this year as well, Plus another for Mahoutsukai in 2024. It’s a good time to be a Precure fan! 2) Jujutsu Kaisen Season 2 In 2021 I wrote "We are in for a treat if they maintain this quality during the Shibuya arc. As a manga reader I can only say its the moment that changes everything.", and I am pleased to report Studio Mappa not only exceeded my expectations but week after week blew them through the sky with a barrage of non-stop high energy sakuga fests. The Shibuya arc is the first major story climax of Jujutsu Kaisen. It's a Togashi inspired storyline that begins with the sealing of Satoru Gojo and the never ending unraveling of the status quo afterwards. Akutami provides minute by minute detail of how characters are constantly changing locations around Shibuya station. My favorite episode was Itadori vs. Choso for its use of color and grounded location that made the fight take full advantage of its location. Akutami sure isn’t afraid to break their characters. Without Gojo present, there was nobody to stop Sakuna from rampaging across Shibuya. Then Yuji only suffered more and more when Nanami and Nobora were killed by Mahito. I also can't forget to mention how the Hidden Inventory/Premature Death arc was presented like a 5 episode movie in tv anime form. What an incredible season from start to finish! Jujutsu Kaisen is one of the extremely rare anime that I consider better than its original manga. Not to dismiss Akutami's art or anything, it's just the animators bring it to life so vividly. They increase the spectacle of every single moment. I feel like I can understand the deeper plot of the series through the anime. Next up is the Culling Game where Akutami doubles down on the Togashi inspirations and the manga hits peak creativity. I can’t wait to see it animated.

3) Oshi no Ko

Idols are a core part of Japanese entertainment culture. There are more idol groups in the underground scene than you can imagine. It's no wonder idol concepts found their way into anime. However, Oshi no Ko is not here for a positive look at the industry. The manga comes from the unlikely combination of Aka Akasaka and Mengo Yokoyari. Akasaka series are usually very cynical by nature as seen in Kaguya-sama with exaggerated daily occurrences that happen to potential lovers. At the same time Mengo's specialty is getting into the weeds of a character's complex emotions through facial expressions. Together this series aims to provide commentary to the idol business and Japanese entertainment industry through the lens of a murder mystery drama. The 90 minute premiere episode was a brilliant way to kick off the anime. Oshi no Ko has a unique start due to the extended prologue. Rather than hoping fans would watch through episode 3 to get the full story, they opted to present it one go. From there the anime covered the first 4 volumes up to Ruby’s first performance. I really like when the ED overlaps the final few seconds of an episode. That never fails to hype up a scene for me. The animation team brought out the best in the manga. Next is the stage play arc where the series takes everything to a new level. I hope the production values will be able to keep up.

4) The 100 Girlfriends Who Really, Really, Really, Really, Really Love You I am someone who is very well versed in anime harem, and let me tell you this takes everything you've ever known about the genre and dials it up to the extreme. 100 GFs is about exactly what it says on the title. It follows a typical harem mc who unfortunately has been told that he has 100 soulmates waiting for him. Rentarou must accept the love of each and every one of them or the rest die. The early GFs filed out the standard archetypes you see in harems such as the tsundere, kuudere, loli, and the overly horny type. However, it's the 6th girlfriend being Hakari's mother where the series fully cements itself to the mission of its premise. You never truly know who might become one of Rentaro's girlfriends. I think the anime did a great job of bringing the gags to life. They even changed a few to better suit the animation medium, I’ll need to read the manga eventually. There’s no way the anime will ever cover this entire story. (Its currently over 150 chapters in and they’ve only reached girlfriend 27)

5) Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch from Mercury This is only the second Gundam Series I have seen (IBO was the first, Gundam Seed the third), and personally I would say G-Witch is my favorite so far. The plot loosely follows a similar plot structure to Utena in the first half before turning into a more typical Gundam in the back half. The main pairing Suletta and Miorine got a complete story that ended with them getting married. In terms of sheer enjoyment, I think this is up as one of the best this year due to cliffhangers every single episodes. It was one of those where the characters feel like they're half a step away from something very bad happening. And of course since it's a Gundam, very bad things do happen constantly. The cour 1 cliffhanger fully cemented the turn in tone of the series. My biggest complaint is I wish the show was longer. They really crammed the story progression in those last few episodes. Another season could have gone a long way in fleshing out everything. I remember wishing Suellta had a face-to-face confrontation with her mom rather than seemingly resolving their animosity remotely.

Honorable Mention: The Eminence in Shadow (Season 1 + Season 2) I didn't watch season 1 while it aired, but it still finished this year and season 2 aired during the fall season. The Eminence in Shadow is another one of those isekai anime that plague the anime airwaves these days, but this one something special. It's stupid and writes itself around that stupidly. The main character Cid is the ultimate self-indulgent chuunibyou. He aims to bring the edgy version of himself to life This story works so well on paper because while Cid is living out his fantasy dreams, all of his actions have real world effects. He says overly flamboyant things and the key terms are things that exist. The harem of ladies who surround him actually think Cid is being insightful which stirs them into action. So while Cid is having the time of his life, a world-shaking plot unfolds in the background which feeds back into what actions Cid chooses to take to embody the “Eminence in Shadow” persona. My favorite part was Cid planned his way through a tournament so he could wow the audience with a flashy final battle. It was a perfect tournament arc template being crafted in real ways. The lengths Cid will go to for achieving that cool pose or fight is hilarious. I think the biggest weakness is the plot being kept purposefully vague and Cid acting adjacent to the story sort of handicaps the potential what it could be. Overall, It’s still a brilliant series that embraces the absurdity of the characters and scenarios. The anime looks way better than you'd expect for something like this. ----------------------------------------------------------------- Biggest Disappointment of the Year: Jigokuraku: This wasn't a "bad" series but more so disappointed by how it was a low priority for Studio Mappa. After the first few episodes the production quality was left in the dust. I suppose it doesn't help either that the first third of the story is mostly exposition. However, compared to the output of other Mappa shows and given its manga popularity, you would think the final result would be better. I’m not holding my breath for future seasons to improve substantially. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Best Openings/Ending of 2023: 1. Undead Unluck Opening 1 - Visually this is the closest I've seen to a modern day Shaft anime. I love the metaphors that allude to events during the first cour. 2. Oshi no Ko Opening - Possibly the best opening of the entire year. Visually simple but the lyrics hit hard with Ai's thoughts and feelings. It only ages better as the story goes on. 3. Oshi no Ko Ending - A very visually striking ED that I think has also aged better as the manga gets deeper into the story. Not many EDs can be memorable like this. 4. Jigokuraku Opening - It's unfair when the opening looks way better the actual series. At least it makes a great case for the strong points of this series. 5. Spy x Family Season 2 Opening - Ado x Yuasa is a combination I didn’t realize I needed in my life. Its a very fun song with amusing animation to back it up which captures the status quo vibes of the series.

[fruggo]

the boys x tough f!reader (part 2)

requested by : @dranonymous

i love this idea and i hope you all enjoy part two! :D here’s part 1 with the original request.

warnings: swearing, canon-typical violence, dwight is really cute, danny is an asshole, jake is that cute “stoic man who is actually caring and thoughtful” trope because i say so

𝐃𝐖𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐅𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐅𝐈𝐄𝐋𝐃

you are so cool. like ,,,,,so cool

dwight admires you so much. you just got here and yet you are breaking pyramid head’s ankles—dodging his trail of torment left and right, the killer just can’t touch you.

and how did you feel about everything? terrified, honestly, but nobody would ever be able to tell because you didn’t let it get to you. it was like you had already been here before, because the second you learned how to do something, you had it down no problem. fixing generators came naturally, and you could also run the killer for the whole trial if you had to. teammates could easily rely on you to do whatever needed to be done.

that was what made you and dwight such a powerful duo. from the moment you met, you knew you felt comfortable around this guy. he was sweet, maybe a little timid sometimes, but he knew how to step up and be a leader for everyone despite his fears.

you both knew what to do, and you fit together like a glove. your minds worked in very similar ways, which made communicating that much easier and efficient; the second a decision needed to be made, dwight was on top of it, encouraging the teammates and helping them get on their feet. you were already ahead of them, so dwight would just nod to you, knowing you could do your job well.

of course, there were times when dwight’s anxiety got the better of him, and you had to be the one encouraging him.

dwight hated the hag. despised her. he could not stand her jumpscares when a trap was triggered, he would swear he was about to have a heart attack. he couldn’t admit this at first, but you figured it out when feng min was hooked and dwight stuck to the generator, nervously glancing over his shoulder every few seconds. he always went for the saves, so something was obviously wrong.

“dwight? why don’t you go save her?” you asked, eyeing him from your side of the generator.

he didn’t respond, looking over his shoulder again.

you decided to rescue min, but when you got back, you were going to chew dwight out until he gave you a straight answer.

you crawled up to the hook to avoid triggering a trap and gently lowered min to the ground. the two of you inched away carefully until you were far enough away to patch her wound.

“dwight, get off your ass and answer me,” you demanded (affectionately) once you were back at the generator, which was nearly finished. “what’s wrong?”

his eyes conveyed nervousness in every sense of the word; they darted all around, searching for any incoming danger. this was your first time seeing him like this, so you were confused. was he alright?

“it’s just…the hag,” he started, still fiddling with the wires. “her traps, i can’t…”

oh. was he anxious about the traps?

“i just can’t deal with them,” he finally said with difficulty. that was understandable; when they caught you off guard it definitely made you leap out of your skin.

“dwight, listen,” you said. “you’ve dealt with every other killer in this realm, haven’t you? you’ve bested the nurse, the huntress, micky myers, and even the spirit, who’s a bitch. i know hag’s traps are fucking terrifying, but you’re dwight! you are a leader, and you are good at being a leader. you can get out of here, i promise. and besides, with me here, you have nothing to worry about. i’ll kick that witch’s ass, got it?”

your very inspirational speech got him to smile. you were right, anyways—you could definitely kick the hag’s ass. what could go wrong?

nothing, actually. genuinely nothing went wrong. you took chase for the rest of the trial so that dwight didn’t have to worry about a thing, and everybody escaped with no problem. he didn’t understand how you were so good at evading capture—but perhaps you would tell him about your past eventually. you hadn’t yet decided.

back at the campfire, you and dwight comfortably sat side-by-side, patiently waiting until your next trials.

“thanks,” he said.

“for what?”

“for that very motivational speech you gave me,” he laughed.

you wiped imaginary dust off of your shoulder, giving him a confident smile. “i got your back. and man, that hag lady really is a bitch, huh? i can see why you hate her.”

that comment unintentionally caused one of dwight’s long, angry rants about his least favorite killer, and all you could do was watch him and listen with a soft grin on your lips. you’d never seen him angry before—it was adorable. made you wonder if you should just piss him off for fun sometimes.

𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊

this guy has hella respect for you

you’re independent and easy to teach, and that’s everything he could ask for.

now and then, the other survivors basically gave newbies to jake to teach them everything about the realm—they considered him the expert on all things survival. you were one of those newbies he was forced to take care of.

jake normally hated teaching new survivors more than anything, because it was never his choice and they were all so difficult. but you were different. you were responsible, reliable, and smart, and it made his job so much easier. as time went on, he grew to be quite fond of you.

word eventually got out that the new girl had managed to charm jake out of his “hermit ways,” but he insisted that it was not true (he also disagreed about the “hermit ways” part). it was never spoken of between the two of you, but it definitely floated around in the air waiting to be addressed.

it really couldn’t be ignored any longer. anytime you were seen anywhere within 24 feet of each other, the other survivors would give you looks and wiggle their eyebrows or shoot you a thumbs up—all of which were unwanted. it created a weird tension between you and jake that wasn’t there before, and you really didn’t like it.

you missed when you were first starting out, and jake had just realized how competent you are. those days were fun—he respected you a lot; you could see it in his face when he looked at you. you always knew when he was pleased and when you did stuff right, because he would have the tiniest, most subtle grin on his face, but you could see it, and it made you feel accomplished.

you knew he still respected you, but you had basically jumped the learning curve of the realm and quickly adapted to every killer, every challenge, and every task. how you did it, nobody could ever know. but you were almost sad, because there was kind of no reason for you and jake to spend a lot of time together anymore. if you did, then everybody would freak out for the wrong reasons, and it would ruin your friendship.

so what if you had a few small feelings for him? no one gave a shit—you knew jake probably wouldn’t give a shit. to him, you were just another annoying survivor he was forced to teach. besides, you didn’t have time for that kind of thing.

man, were you wrong, though. he really, really wanted to be around you, but you already knew everything, so he didn’t know what to do to spend time with you. his way of initial bonding was sharing knowledge, but that had already been done, so…what now?

then came the one trial that changed everything.

it was normal at first. the killer, blight, was doing well, so you had to step up your game. one generator was completed and he had 4 hooks on three different people—you were the only one not hooked yet.

he was after you, and you were expertly dodging every rush and swing he threw your way. unfortunately, you accidentally ran to the generator that jake was working on, and things got a little complicated.

when the blight rushed at the wall, then at you, jake ran towards you while you ran towards him—you were both looking over your shoulders—and alas, bonk. you crashed into each other.

oh, no!! how terrible!! looks like jake fell on top of you :/ what an unfortunate situation to be in /s /s /s /s /s

wowwww near proximity ! you’d never been so close before and it was awkward but nice (?)

then you remembered there was a crazy drug addict or whatever over there and he was chasing you, and the moment was ruined. jake quickly rose and pulled you up with him, and you went in opposite directions, both nervous and wide-eyed now.

lol

after that, the trial went quite south. everybody was sacrificed. perhaps the loss could be partly attributed to you and jake avoiding each other like the plague. but who knows, right?

back at the campfire, you began feeling overwhelmed by all the weird stuff happening lately, so you excused yourself to the edge of the woods to have some quiet time to yourself. a few minutes later, jake came to check on you bc he is a fucking gentleman and yes i will die for the “stoic man who is actually caring and thoughtful” trope. fuck you

it’s slightly awkward at first, but then you start talking like normal and things feel a lot better. a little bit of the tension eases away, but not completely. what the fuck do you do with feelings like this?????

you simply composed yourself as best you could. it would have to do.

now that you felt a little more normal (lie), you trekked back to the campfire to wait for your next trials side-by-side. there was no one you felt more comfortable with or more respected by than jake. he appreciated you for your competency, and that was one of the best things you could ask for.

and to your surprise, jake actually took your hand and laced your fingers with his own. and it felt nice. never in your existence would you have thought he would be okay with displaying public affection, but you smiled up at him and gave his hand a light squeeze.

maybe the entity gave him drugs.

or he just liked you that much. either one would make sense.

𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐘 𝐉𝐎𝐇𝐍𝐒𝐎𝐍

danny hated you. he really did.

you were so unbothered, so calm, so good at knowing what to do. it really pissed him off.

you got so much attention from the other survivors for your skill and that really pissed him off too. it’s not like you cared or wanted it or anything, but how dare they even touch you when you so clearly belonged to danny?

…who knows wtf that even means. so anyways-

when you realized how much time danny spent chasing you in trials when he should have been patrolling generators, you began to get suspicious. especially when he would take you to the hatch and then close it in your face, watching you die to the entity. he obviously had some kind of beef with you.

you were determined to find out what he had against you, so you began to tease him a bit in chases. your favorite and most frequent phrase was something like, "can't catch me? lil baby man? lil baby? lil baby man gonna cry?" you were really testing your luck with that one, and that's why you loved it.

once, you told him his fly was down, and he actually fell for it, making you nearly keel over in laughter. you got moried without even being hooked after that.

despite the horrors that frequented this place, you were never in a crisis about it. you simply learned what had to be done, and then you did it, much to the chagrin of danny. you had skipped the big "useless baby survivor" phase, and that one was his favorite :( he loved trials with new survivors because it was so easy and fun!

but alas, from the beginning, you were always on top of things, always slamming pallets onto his head or saving teammates with a flashlight.

oh, don't even get him started on your flashlight usage. you were the absolute worst to go against--every pallet stun, boom: danny's eyes fucking burned out. every time he picks up a survivor, boom: danny's eyes fucking burned out. you were a bitch with that item.

he finally began to get so fed up with your behavior that he decided you must be taught a lesson. somehow, countless mori and tunneling and camping incidents had not even managed to bother you. you literally did not care. but he had something different in mind this time.

the realm was haddonfield, of course. all of the killers despised this map, and for good reason--you ran danny around the entire neighborhood for three generators. did he have to chase you? no. but he needed to for himself.

he finally caught you in a dead zone, rejoicing to himself as you fell to the ground in defeat. "wow, that was a good chase," you mumbled under your breath, feeling accomplished. one of your best against danny, probably.

you were expecting him to pick you up, but instead he snatched the flashlight from your grasp and chucked it as far away as he could. and before you could protest, he pulled you up to stand again and yanked you towards himself, gripping your wrists so tightly you swore it left bruises.

"what's wrong...lil baby man?" you said with a pout, trying not to laugh. "is baby man angry?"

you were slightly scared if you were being honest, but you couldn't let him know that.

danny sighed. you really didn't know when to stop, did you?

"bitch," he spat, voice dangerously quiet. "cut that shit out."

"what shit?"

he squeezed your arms tighter, provoking an "okay, okay, i get it!" from you.

"do you?"

"sure. what's the worst you could possibly do to me anyways?" after those words left your mouth, you got a weird feeling that the killer was smiling behind his mask.

"listen, uhh, danny, is it?" you said, putting as much nonchalance into your voice as you could. "i just wanna know why you hate me so much. remember that time you closed the hatch in my face? the fuck was that for?"

he frowned at the use of his name but responded regardless, "you're a little bitch, and you deserved that."

you gasped dramatically, feigning offense. "ouch. that one hurt."

"i can make you hurt a lot more," he said darkly. you probably should have been scared, but you just really couldn't take him seriously.

so you laughed. it shouldn't have been funny, but it just was and now you couldn't stop. "you're just--you--i can't--" you wheezed, shaking from the laughter. "i'm sorry, it's really not funny."

danny didn't understand you. anybody else would have been sobbing if he so much as touched them, and here you were acting like it was a joke.

what could he do if you truly were not afraid of him?

perhaps it was time to let it go.

while his guard was down, suddenly you reached above his head and plucked his mask off, revealing his face and continuing your bouts of laughter at his shocked expression.

you threw the mask in the same direction as the flashlight, composing yourself and putting your hands on your hips. "you look pretty nice," you said, nodding.

wow. what the hell was danny supposed to do with you? perhaps the only completely unbothered, completely unserious survivor? he knew you were smart, and you knew what you were doing. he didn't even want to kill you anymore, you were just that fascinating.

that trial ended in you standing at the exit gate, your finger and your thumb in the shape of an L on your forehead. danny couldn’t care less at this point--he was done with your shit. but somehow he still liked you, and this definitely would not be the last time you saw him without his mask.

[screamin-abt-haikyuu]

Asahi accidentally tells you his feelings in front of the entire team (Part 1)

The resident gentle giant of Karasuno accidentally blurts out his feelings for Y/N in front of his team but Y/N does not realize it. How will this mess play out?

Asahi x gn! reader || sfw   Genre: A mix of fluff and comedy 

You and Asahi have been going out for about 4 months now and things have been going extremely well. He is the sweetest, kindest, most thoughtful, most caring person you have ever known and your heart just melts into a puddle every time he smiles at you. He is just so loving and affectionate and perfect and even though you are still in high school, you already know in your heart that he is the one for you. 

You have been wanting to say the L-word to him for a while now but you are afraid that it will scare him off because it is too soon for him or, even worse, he will say the words back to you just so you don’t feel bad but won’t actually mean them. I mean, it took the boy almost a year of friendship to warm up to you and find the courage to ask you out and even after 4 months of being together, he still gets nervous and flustered around you (He still tends to knock something over every time you hold his hand in public. Or at home. He also may or may not have walked head-on into trees and lampposts because he was too flustered to notice where he was going. How is he still functioning? Someone save his soul). It has gotten a LOT better since the first time you went out, though. So, you tell yourself that it has only been 4 months and you have to stay quiet and patient. After all, you are in this for the long run and you are willing to give your sweet boyfriend as much time as he needs to get comfortable around you. 

School is over for the day and you have plans to go watch a movie with your friends. Asahi can’t come with you because he has volleyball practice. However, you two have planned a date night later in the evening. You were excited to check out this cutesy new café that recently opened up in town and Asahi suggested going there for your next date night. 

As you are packing up your books, you realize that Asahi has left his hairband at his desk in his hurry to rush to the gym. Noya had, as usual, come screaming like a banshee into the classroom and made Asahi jump so high out of his seat that he could have spiked a ball onto the other side of the court. If this was a Tom and Jerry cartoon, mans would have shot straight through the roof. 

Flustered as he was, he had given you a quick kiss on the cheek and stammered a million apologies before running after the Libero. You finish packing and pick up the hairband to give it to him on your way out.

You tell your friends you will be right back after giving Asahi his hairband and they shout after you with a warning that you all need to get to the cinema asap or you will miss the beginning of the movie.  “Don’t worry, I won’t take long. You guys go on ahead and save a seat for me. I’ll pay you as soon as I get there,” you shout back as you run towards the club room. You assume the boys would still be changing as it has barely been a few minutes since Asahi left.

You reach the club room and you can hear voices coming from inside. You knock on the door.

“It’s me, y/n”

Asahi was rummaging through his bag, desperately looking for his hairband when he heard your voice. He stops and looks towards the door. He is a little surprised and worried for he knew you had to rush to the cinema as soon as you were done packing. Was something wrong?

“Oh, hey y/n! Come in. We’re almost all done here,” Suga calls out to you.

You open the door slowly to see the Karasuno VBC team almost all ready in their jerseys. They all say hi and wave at you as you enter the room. Noya and Tanaka have very mischievous and teasing smiles on their faces as they look back and forth from you and Asahi. You smile and wave back at everyone.

“Hey guys, I just came by to return Asahi his hairband.” 

A look of relief washes over Asahi’s face as you quickly make your way towards him at the back of the room with his hairband in your hand. However, that relief is only for an instant as his face turns a little pink the next second.

“Hey, Y/N! T-thanks but you did not have to come all this way to return this. You could have given it to me tonight at the café!”

“Yeah, true, but I knew you’d be uncomfortable practicing with your hair all in your face so I thought I’d give it to you now.”

“B-but what about your movie?”

“Oh, don’t worry. I asked the others to go on ahead and save a seat for me.”

Asahi’s face is a deep pink now as you hand him his hairband and smile at him. As he smiles and thanks you, he cannot help but think how thoughtful and caring you are towards him. You pay attention to even the littlest things about him and it always makes his heart swell up with adoration and gratitude. 

“Sorry, I cannot stay longer. Gotta rush!!” You give him a quick peck on his cheek (man’s face is fully red now) before turning and starting to run towards the door.

“Bye, guys! Have fun at practice! Bye, Asahi! See you at night.” You shout as you are almost at the door.

What Asahi wanted to say:

“Bye, see you!”

What he actually said:

“Y-yeah. Bye, love you!” 

By the time he finished his sentence, you were already out the door. 

The entire Karasuno VBC at that moment:

And poor Asahi after he realized what he just said:

Part 2 is up!

Hope you enjoyed reading this!! 

Likes, reblogs and follows are very much appreciated.

I hope this came out as funny as it did in my head and I managed to at least bring a smile on your faces. I really, really enjoyed writing this and any feedback would be welcome.

Pls forgive any grammatical/tense mistakes. I’m not used to writing in the present tense but felt it was right for this post. I might have slipped up a lil in b/w tho.

This is my first time writing fics (or is it an HC I have no idea what the difference is sorry someone help I’m v new to tumblr and the writing space)

Buy me a Kofi! <3

[bitsandbobsofwriting]

Soulmate AU Part 4 (final part):

Uther continues to be very OOC and Merlin is presented to the Kingdom; luckily enough, everyone already loves him. The Future starts to come together...

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3

The summer passed in much the same way the previous year had; awkwardly polite conversation between Merlin and Uther, Leon panicking at everything, Gwen being exasperated, Morgana and Merlin pissing about, and Arthur watching it all with exponentially growing fondness.

Eventually, it was Yuletide again. Yuletide meant Arthur’s 18th birthday. Arthur’s 18th birthday meant revealing Merlin to the Kingdom; announcing him as The Crown Prince’s Soulmate.

There was an odd mix of feelings surrounding the upcoming event. Both Arthur and Merlin were ecstatic at the idea of not having to hide and sneak around anymore, but Merlin was a foreign peasant boy. The common people would love him, Nobles and Foreign dignitaries? Not so much. Granted, Arthur had a powerfully intimidating presence, when he chose to display it, Morgana could glare anyone into submission, and even Leon was known to be passive aggressively threatening when it concerned Merlin’s safety and respect, but not all could be daunted into compliance. Merlin would surely face discrimination.

That, and the growing spotlight meant that it would become much harder to keep his magic a secret. With Uther’s insistence that Merlin be... part of the family, they’d already had a few close calls.

Thankfully, not much else had changed, or it had changed for the better. Arthur and Merlin still scared everyone else shitless when they popped up to each other, but Morgana’s visions seemed a lot less terrifying now. Leon still had heart palpitations when Merlin and The King were in the same room, but Gwen, Gaius, and Hunith relaxed more; the Physician especially could see the pride glowing in Uther’s eyes, and the awkward fondness he held for Merlin (even if that wouldn't protect him if Uther discovered his magic).

Nevertheless, no ones’ fears or aspirations stopped the passage of time (though Merlin, in his increasing power, had put it on his “List of Things to Try Before I Die”), and Arthur’s crowning ceremony crept closer, day by day.

Hunith, Merlin, Leon, Gwen, and Gaius were gifted front row seats to the event, and as annoyed as Uther was at having the front row taking by commoners, a servant, and a young knight, he didn’t dare argue; he’d learnt that it was pointless now. Morgana was stood behind Uther’s throne at her own seat, giving Arthur a rare smile, not a hint of teasing in her expression, and Arthur returned it easily, comforted by the dream she told him she had the previous night (of adoring crowds and a grinning Merlin) despite his nerves.

The ceremony of course went of without a hitch, a rare smile on Uther’s face, and tears on all the faces of Arthur’s front row.

After an uproarious round of applause and chants of “Long Live The King, Long Live The Prince!”, the room cleared, leaving only Uther, Arthur, Morgana, Merlin, and a few faceless guards.

(Gaius, Hunith, Gwen, and Leon rushed off, wanting to be at the front of the crowds in the courtyard when Arthur and Merlin were presented to the Kingdom.)

Merlin didn’t hesitate in rushing up the steps to Arthur, wrapping his soulmate in a tight hug and whispering his pride into his blushing ear. For once, Morgana didn’t roll her eyes at the display of affection; Arthur may have occasional spurts of arrogance, and the two of them still acted like immature children occasionally, but she loved them both dearly. Uther did roll his eyes, though he could not hide his fondness from Morgana, who raised (yet another) teasing eyebrow at him. He glared at her half-heartedly before clearing his throat, and the boys jumped apart with a start.

He wordlessly nodded towards the door of the Throne Room, and walked out regally, his steps fast and heavy and his cloak billowing behind him. Merlin and Arthur followed quickly, hand in hand, and Morgana walked closely behind them, the guards bringing up the rear. The group finally made it to the large double doors that opened out onto the balcony above the courtyard, though it was two corridors previously that they began to hear the cheering and festivities below.

Arthur could feel Merlin’s hand shaking in his own, and squeezes it comfortingly, giving him a reassuringly soft smile as he murmurs, so Uther can’t hear them:

“Don’t worry, it’ll only be a few minutes, then we’ll come back in. You’ll be introduced to nobles and such during the feast,-”

When Merlin begins to look even more distressed, Arthur rolls his eyes good-naturedly and continues before his Warlock can interrupt him:

“-yes, I know, we’ll have to mingle, but this evening, it’s just us and the others. We’ll take some food and wine back to yours, and we can have some fun and all fall asleep in front of the fire together. Alright?”

Merlin takes a deep breath and nods, but before he can say anything, Uther stops his conversation with one of the guards and abruptly turns around, his face tersely concerned.

He takes one look at the boys before tutting and stepping towards them. Arthur freezes in shock as Uther begins to run a gloved hand through his hair, neatening it out and flattening it properly under the newly placed crown before stepping back again with a satisfied nod of the head. Arthur’s wide eyes stare straight ahead, and Morgana (having snuck in front of them to watch the whole ordeal) has to stop herself from snorting at his face. If she thought that was funny... well.

Next, Uther’s eyes move to Merlin, where he gives an even more disapproving tut and steps forward once more. He removes one of his gloves quickly, wetting his thumb with his tongue before wiping it just a little too harshly along Merlin’s nose, muttering-

“How the hell are you always so Godamn grubby?”

-to himself. Morgana doesn’t manage to hold in her giggles at that, clamping a hand over her mouth as she dedicates this whole scene to memory forever. Arthur is staring at his father with not even an attempt to hide his bafflement, but at this point, Uther is too busy brushing invisible lint off of Merlin’s shoulders to notice the incredulous stares from the three teenagers (and all the guards).

He finally steps back, huffing out a sigh, and muttering-

“That will have to do, I suppose.”

-before turning back to the doors and gesturing to the guards. Morgana, and Arthur have only a moment to regain their composure before they are ushered out on the balcony; Merlin staying back as he had been informed to do that morning, though he can hear the cheers get impossibly louder as the three royals greet their people.

Arthur glances back, just quickly, giving him one last smile before facing his people and standing in support of his father’s kingly speech:

“My people! Today, on this year’s Winter Solstice, my son has come of age!-”

The crowds had quietened significantly when Uther began, but another cheer went up at his words, and he paused, holding a silencing hand up:

“-I now present him to you, as Crown Prince Arthur Pendragon, heir to the throne of Camelot, my successor!”

His hand moves to gesture at Arthur, and the Prince steps forward as The King steps back, a wide smile on the blonde's face as his people cheer for him. He waves back, eyes searching the crowd for Hunith, Gaius, Gwen, and Leon; they meet gazes just as Uther steps forward once more, holding his hand up again:

“There is other news! It is...-”

He looks to Arthur, settling a hand on his shoulder and giving him a small smile. His voice quietens a little, but it can still be heard by the crowd:

“-it is with great pride, that I announce-”

The moment ended as quickly as it had started as Uther turns back to the crowds below, raising his voice again:

“-that my son has found his soulmate!!-”

Arthur had been expecting loud cheers, but their audience grows quiet and still at the announcement, as if frozen in suspense. As he peers over the stone barrier, he can see almost everyone in the crowd pairing off slightly, pulling their soulmates closer as they wait with baited breath to see their Prince’s partner.

Inside, Merlin takes a deep breath, but relaxes slightly when he sees Arthur unclench his own nervous fist, holding it behind him in preparation, invitation, for Merlin to take it in just a few moments:

“-I present to you, a close family friend of the royals,-”

(Morgana scoffs and rolls her eyes, but thankfully no one is paying her any attention.)

“-a skilled physician in training, and a trusted citizen of this Great Kingdom,-”

He gestures towards the door behind him, and Merlin takes his first shaky step forward, coming into line with Arthur as Uther finishes:

“Merlin, of Ealdor!”

Arthur and Merlin walk to the front of the balcony, hand in hand, as the loudest cheers Merlin has ever heard explode from the crowd. Despite the thunderous noise, Merlin can still pick out the cheers of his mother, uncle, friend, and older brother, and the leisurely applause from Morgana behind him, and he smiles in spite of his nerves. Arthur squeezes his hand once more, and they raise their joined fists to the crowds as they grin, struggling to hold in their laughter at the sheer amount of joy on the faces of everyone (bar Uther, of course, he just looked marginally happy)  present.

Merlin has become even more recognised around the kingdom; normally seen trailing Gaius (who is also well-known, and well-loved) or, as inappropriate as it might be (at least according to Uther’s council), hanging around with Morgana and Gwen during the day. The castle’s servants and the majority of the knights had guessed that Merlin was the soulmate of either Prince Arthur or the Lady Morgana, what with how often he was with them and the way King Uther was apparently ok with that, and gossip spread like wildfire. But the loud cheers just drive home how well-loved Merlin is, and he tears up in response.

Merlin and Arthur finally step away from the edge of the balcony, and Uther continues his address of the people, though it passes by in a bit of a blur for Merlin, and he tunes out fairly quickly. He’s vaguely aware of Arthur running a soft thumb over his knuckles, and Morgana stepping towards him to clutch the edge of his tunic (loud crowds had never been her thing), but the speech and the cheering are drowned out by his racing thoughts.

~

Uther’s speech finally came to an end and the crowd dissipated. The King rushed off immediately, after sending what could almost be described as a respectfully fond nod in Merlin’s direction, but Morgana, Arthur, and Merlin luckily had nothing pressing to attend to before the feast, and had around an hour of time to waste (read: relax).

Despite Leon escorting the three of them to Merlin and Hunith’s home dressed in full armour, sword strapped to his hip, the journey took twice as long as it normally did, with various nobles and citizens alike wanting to stop them in the street and congratulate them. Arthur and Merlin were endlessly polite and extremely grateful for the support of their (now shared) people, but Leon’s forceful insistence that they “have somewhere important to be, My Lords, My Lady” went quietly thanked.

Hunith, Gaius, and Gwen met them at the house, and a round of tight hugs was shared; all staring fondly when Hunith wouldn’t let Merlin go for love nor money, whispering tearful exclamations of pride in his ear.

The hour felt like it passed in mere minutes, but it was enough time at least for Merlin to relax a little. Morgana and Gwen helped Hunith get ready, and Merlin definitely did NOT tear up when she came out of her room dressed like royalty, a string of Morgana’s pearls around her neck. Arthur and Morgana had deliberately stored a spare set of clothes here so they didn’t have to go back to the castle to change, and the Prince just about managed to force Merlin into a new jacket and cloak (”Why?!”  “Because you have to, it’s protocol, you have to be dressed differently.”  “That’s fucking stu-”  “Merlin, I love you, but shut up and get changed.”  “...Prat.” ) .

The seating arrangements weren’t too terrible. As per normal, Uther sat at the head of the table, with Arthur around the corner on the King’s right and Morgana to his left. Merlin sat in between Arthur and his mother; Leon was, unfortunately, on guard duty, though thankfully he was being assigned to Prince Duty (training, hunts, patrols, bodyguard, etc) more and more, meaning he was stood at the wall behind the two boys. 

Thankfully, the only stranger anywhere near Merlin was a respected Camelot noble seated opposite him, and he seemed far more interested in boasting about his son to the King in the hopes of winning him a knighthood than he was in Merlin, and payed barely any attention to him other than the occasional distasteful glare (they did not go unnoticed by Arthur, and simply guaranteed that his prick of a son wasn’t going to end up anywhere near a sword).

So all in all, the feast wasn’t too bad. Merlin’s stomach was turning a little, but Arthur’s hand on his thigh under the table and his mother’s shoulder occasionally brushing against his own calmed him right down, though he still kept well away from any alcohol or too-rich foods, worried about making a fool of himself or turning his stomach even more.

The Gang also had Gwen serving them. Morgana had given up on her pleas to have her join them at the table fairly quickly; she could argue with Uther endlessly on many things, but she knew she was never going to win this one. At Guinevere’s insistence that today wasn’t about her, and Morgana shouldn’t ruin Uther’s tenuous good mood on Arthur’s birthday AND coronation AND soulmate-reveal-day, she gave in. But Merlin appreciated the feeling of friendly eyes, both Leon’s and Gwen’s, on his back for the course of the feast.

Just like during the celebrations of Arthur’s knighting ceremony, the tables were cleared from the room to make way for music and dancing, though this time Arthur and Merlin didn’t have to hide their partnership.

Merlin’s stomach turned more at the mingling he was forced to do, answering awkward questions about the purity of his blood and where he came from and his education and his understanding of social etiquette, almost all of which were phrased in condescending and/or downright spiteful ways. But the way Arthur’s arm, looped through his, tensed, and the scowl the Prince sported when Merlin couldn’t bring himself to, partnered with Leon’s comforting shadow (and even Uther’s, when the question’s strayed into cruelty) made him feel at least justified in his discomfort.

Morgana, at the quiet request of Merlin, spent the entire night by Hunith’s side, shielding her from the malicious glaring of nobles who felt cheated by her accidental winning of a position in the royal family. She was granted at least a little respect due to her being a relation of Gaius, who was highly respected and close to the King, but that was about as far as her favour went, and she was eternally grateful for Morgana’s steadfast presence and silent-but-deadly brand of defence.

The night passed slowly, but not so unpleasantly that Merlin was too desperate for it to end, though that changed rather jarringly when he found himself without Arthur for the first time. The Prince and Merlin had been stood next to each other, though involved in different conversations; thankfully for Merlin, he had been having a rather lovely chat about country-life with the wife of a knight. It was when she was pulled away by her husband to converse with another that Merlin realised that Arthur had also been pulled away by whoever it was he had been talking to.

Merlin tensed when he couldn’t immediately spot his soulmate through the crowd, but took a calming breath when he did spot Leon stood dutifully against the opposite wall, Guinevere next to him. That was fine, it wasn’t Arthur, but it was better than nothing, and he allowed his anxiety to swirl in his lungs for only a moment before he began his soft-stepped journey across the hall. 

He caught Leon’s eye, thankfully, and the knight frowned slightly at the empty space next to him before sending a reassuring smile his way, nodding in encouragement and understanding.

Alas, he only made it halfway when he was stopped by a rather harsh hand on his shoulder.

He turns around, barely swallowing a gasp and a flinch, only to come face to face with the noble he had been sat opposite during the feast. The hand was uncomfortably tight on his shoulder, and Merlin wanted more than anything to push it away, but instead he forced a smile on his face and bowed his head respectfully, hoping beyond hope that Arthur would make a reappearance or Leon would see his discomfort and be able to come up with an excuse to abandon his post:

“Lord Otto, a pleasure to see you again.”

The drunken Lord let out a huff of sarcastic laughter, pressing his thumb even more severely into Merlin’s collarbone:

“Hmm, a pleasure indeed. Tell me boy, how is it that you, a peasant, think yourself worthy of such a magnificent soulmate?”

Merlin’s eyes widen in shock. No one had been so obviously disdainful, but the over-indulgence in alcohol, the Lord’s privileged seat at the table, and Merlin's lack of any sort of protector had evidently given him a boost in confidence. Merlin stuttered for a few moments, not quite sure what to say, before quietly coming out with:

“Well... I... don’t really know, I-”

He’s interrupted by a far softer hand on his other shoulder, but is even more shocked when, instead of Leon or Arthur, he found The King stood by his side, flicking an incredibly scornful gaze between Lord Otto’s hand and face. It does nothing to dissuade the Lord, and Merlin can’t disguise his wince this time when the hand once again tightens it’s grip.

Merlin had hoped he’d been subtle, but the clenching of Uther’s jaw tells him he had not been; before he can worry about what social rule he had broken and how Uther was going to punish him for it, The King finally settled his glare on Otto’s face:

“I must insist that you remove your hand from my boy’s person, and refrain from making such improper inquiries.”

His cold tone almost sends a shiver down Merlin’s spine, but the confusion of having Uther being in defence of him (a Warlock) stops the reaction before it even starts. The Lord glances up at the crown sitting strongly on Uther’s head, seemingly reminding himself of his company, before dropping his hand from Merlin’s shoulder as if he’d been burned.

He bows his head shallowly, making himself look as subservient as his pride could manage, and Uther gives him a barely restrained look of disgust when he looks up again, interrupting any quivering apologies he might have made:

“It’s getting rather late, and you’ve indulged enough for one night, do you not think? I suggest you end your evening here, Lord Otto.”

All three knew that it was not a suggestion, and Otto bows once more before muttering a humiliated, red-faced “Right you are, Your Majesty” and waddling out of the hall, towards the guest chambers.

Merlin let out a breath, his face just a little flushed as Uther spares him a quick, concerned glance before pushing him gently towards an on-going conversation between Arthur and a group of knights on the other side of the band. Merlin lets out a relieved breath when he sees his partner, but quickly frowns in concern when he then sees the tense line of Arthur’s shoulders and the way his eyes were darting around the room. He’s obviously paying only the shallowest of attention to the conversation at hand; but then they meet gazes, and the tension drains out of him as he sends a relieved smile Merlin’s way.

Arthur politely excuses himself from the conversation, using the blinding smile that only made an appearance when he was manipulating courtiers and nobles, before making his way through the crowd towards Merlin, evidently trying to disguise his desperation. Merlin was absent-mindedly aware of Uther keeping pace with him, the supportive hand on his shoulder-blade not leaving even when Merlin sped up slightly.

(If Merlin had been thinking about anything other than just being at Arthur’s side again, he would’ve found the odd mix of disgust and gratitude for Uther’s presence very confusing.)

They finally reach each other and Arthur grabs Merlin’s hand gently, pulling him to his side and landing a soft kiss to his cheek. Uther finally removes his hand from Merlin’s back, and it’s the absence of touch that reminds Merlin of The King’s presence. He turns quickly, hand safely in Arthur’s grip, to give Uther a flushed, timid smile:

“I... uh... thank you, My Lord.”

Uther gives him a tight smile, though you’d have to be blind to miss the slight fondness in his expression as he shakes his head:

“Hmm, I’ve been looking for an excuse to get Otto out of here for at least an hour, the man is intolerable, his incessant rambling about his unremarkable son even more so.”

Merlin nodded awkwardly and tightened his hold on Arthur’s hand, but before either boy can say anything, Uther lets out a deep breath, relaxing his shoulders and settling hesitant hands on one of their shoulders each:

“I... am proud of you both, and I wish you all the happiness in the world. One day, this Kingdom shall be yours, and it will be golden under your rule.”

Merlin almost manages to forget the whole... unforgivable genocide thing, and gives The King a weak, though grateful smile, running his thumb over Arthur’s knuckles when he feels the blonde shake slightly. Arthur tears up at Uther’s words, but thankfully manages to keep his voice steady as he quietly replies:

“Thank you, father, we will do everything in our power to live up to your legacy.”

(An utter lie, considering they plan on undoing pretty much everything he’s known for the moment they come into power, but Uther doesn’t need to know that, and the sentiment remains.)

Uther gives Arthur one last gentle smile, before lowering his hands and straightening his posture, going from awkwardly doting father to detached mighty King within a second. He nods at each of them before turning and walking regally away, his cloak billowing behind him and his golden crown shining atop his head.

Arthur tilts his head in question and tugs Merlin’s hand slightly when he sees the small frown on the younger’s face:

“Merls? What did Otto do? He didn't hurt you, did he?!”

Merlin looked up at him in shock before blinking away the surprise and chuckling:

“Ah, no, nothing like that, just asked how a peasant ended up with such a magnificent soulmate.-”

Arthur looked like he wasn’t sure whether to be flattered or offended on Merlin’s behalf, so he settled for an odd mix of the two:

“-That didn’t bother me though, it was... Uther called me his boy.”

Arthur dropped his chin slightly in shock:

“He what?”

Merlin shrugged:

“He said “I must insist that you remove your hand from my boy”. It was very... disconcerting, and oddly endearing considering what he’d do if he knew what I was.”

He whispered the last part quietly, and Arthur raised his eyebrows in surprise before chuckling quietly:

“Wow, never thought I’d see the day. My father being protective of a commoner and telling me how proud he is all in one evening, perhaps the world is ending.”

Merlin snorts, rolling his eyes and softly responding:

“Hmm. He may be a bit of a prat, but he does love you, and he has his moments.”

Arthur narrows his eyes at Merlin good-naturedly, a smirk dangerously close to breaking out on his face:

“You know Merlin, you may be right, but you’re still the only person I allow to say it aloud without sanction.”

Merlin just smirks and raises an eyebrow; Arthur laughs, and the world feels right.

~

It was late by the time Arthur and Merlin finally decided to call it quits. Morgana, Gaius, and Hunith had left around an hour ago, Gwen following them the moment her shift ended. Technically, someone had come to take over from Leon about halfway through the night, but he stuck around, patrolling the shadows of the room with one eye on Merlin always.

(The boys had insisted that he should go home and relax, but were quietly grateful when he stayed.)

They had been wanting to leave for hours, and normally they could easily get away with such an absence, but this particular celebration was in their honour, it wouldn't do to leave too early, so they finally made their way out of the hall when the crowds had halved and it was approaching midnight.

Uther gave them one last pat on the back when they said goodbye, and the tension practically melted off them when they stepped foot outside, despite the freezing temperatures of winter in the dead of night.

Leon stepped out just a moment after them, and the three of them make quick work of the journey to the house, not wanting to dally in the frigid air and just a little desperate to find themselves in the comforting presence on the family they had built.

They arrive just in time to find Hunith pouring out mugs of hot chocolate (a luxury that Merlin and Hunith never had in Ealdor), and Gwen adding another log to the fire. The next round of hugs was quicker than the last; everyone was tired and eager to settle down, to push the insensitive questions to the back of their minds and revel in the positive feeling of things moving forward.

Arthur had removed his cloak immediately upon entry, folding it precisely and leaving it on the table in the hall, his golden circlet following shortly after, cushioned by the soft fabric, but Merlin excused himself to their bedroom, changing into comfier clothes and washing his face. He had been looking forward to leaving all night, but now that he was home, he found all he wanted to do was collapse in bed and sleep, Arthur securely in his arms.

A knock at the door broke him out of his slow moving thoughts, and he frowned slightly, Arthur wouldn’t knock:

“Come in.”

It was Leon that opened the door, having rid himself of his sword and most of his armour (a pain in the arse, considering he’ll have to wake up early to put it all on again, but oh well), and he stepped into the room, quietly shutting the door again behind him. Merlin sent him a tired smile, but Leon saw through it and raised an eyebrow:

“You alright, Birdy? Anyone in particular you’d like me to embarrass during training or council meetings?”

Merlin laughed and shook his head:

“No, that definitely won’t endear me to people. Honestly, it was a lot better than I was expecting, and having Arthur scowling at people and Uther defending me was rather entertaining in the end.”

Leon snorted, muttering a quietly amused “yeah, I bet” before stepping forward and enveloping Merlin in a tight hug, one hand on his back, one in his hair, holding him close. Merlin melted into the embrace, clutching the back of Leon’s tunic tightly as the older man swayed on his feet slightly, murmuring:

“I’m proud of you, little brother. You handled everything just fine, the kingdom loves you; you’re doing great.”

Merlin lets out a deep breath and steps back, though was grateful to feel Leon’s hands still on his shoulders as he replies:

“Thank you. Honestly, I’m just exhausted, I don’t know how I’m going to deal with this for the rest of my life, and I... I don’t want to disappoint Arthur.”

Leon rolled his eyes good-naturedly and ruffled Merlin’s hair:

“You could never. He loves you more than anything in this world, Birdy, you’re made for each other, after all. He would abandon all of this in a heartbeat if he thought it would make you happy.”

Merlin frowns slightly, clenching his jaw:

“Yeah, I know, that’s what worries me. We’re meant to... bring about a golden age or whatever, and we can’t do that if we leave, but I’m not sure I’m going to be any good at the... politics, or the court manipulation or anything that comes with... with running a Kingdom. I know it’s a long way off but...-”

Leon nods in understanding and squeezes Merlin’s shoulder softly:

“You’ve got plenty of time to learn. And hey, if you want to stay away from the politics? Fine, Arthur and Morgana have plenty of expertise in that area. You’re a physician, Merls, not a courtier, and the kingdom already loves you, not because you’re a good politician or anything like that, but because you’re a good person, and you’re worth loving. Just keep being yourself and you’ll be absolutely fine. And besides, you’ll always have us lot to fall back on when you’re unsure; you’ll never be alone, little brother, I’ll make sure of it.”

Merlin nods and sniffles slightly at Leon’s words, giving him another tight hug. They step back into the hall, and Leon gives Merlin’s hand a gentle squeeze:

“Ready? I can tell them you headed to bed, if you just want some sleep?”

Merlin smiles and shakes his head, pulling Leon to the living room, where everyone is undoubtedly crowded around the fire surrounded by blankets and pillows.

~

From that day forth, Merlin’s life becomes a lot more... official.

He was officially given sword-fighting lessons by a few of the older knights, though thanks to the lessons Leon, Arthur, and Morgana had given him already, he held his own pretty well, and they were more than impressed with the skill level of someone they had assumed was a complete beginner.

He was officially invited to the occasional council meeting (at least the boring, everyday ones). He was always a silent spectator, his participation discouraged, though his presence expected; Arthur always made a point to ask his opinions afterwards though.

His new duties and lessons, on top of his pre-existing duties as the Physician’s Apprentice, AND having to keep his magic hidden and his reputation intact, was all somewhat overwhelming for Merlin, but the steadfast support of Arthur and Morgana when it concerns politics, and Gaius talking Uther down when The King wants Merlin to be more involved in court life, definitely help him in everyday life. Gwen’s hugs and Leon’s hair ruffling are certainly God-sends as well.

The oddest thing was the way people addressed Merlin now. He wasn’t even of age yet, but people were calling him Lord, and servants bowed at him in the corridor. There wasn’t much he could do about the nobles without making some incredible social faux pas, but he always flushed at the servants and insisted they stop bowing and just call him Merlin, at least when no one else is around. 

Thankfully, both visitors to the Kingdom and local nobles tone down the snootiness, especially when Uther publicly shows Merlin respect and rumours (correct rumours) spread of Arthur and Morgana’s protectiveness.

Merlin’s birthday was celebrated minimally, though there was, once again, a mix of feelings upon the realisation that he was now only one year away from being of age, and things would surely get even more intense when that happened. But they all tried to push it from their minds, at least for the time being.

As winter broke and the sun came up on what was undoubtedly a Spring day, Merlin felt the most refreshed he had in a long time, though his mood dropped instantly when he, Arthur, and Morgana were summoned to Uther’s private study... only to be given another mini, awkward “I’m proud of you” speech, and given a week off.

Of course, Arthur was still somewhat expected to keep up with his training at least a little, but really, there was nothing forcing him to.

They exited the study flushed with pride and excitement at the prospect of doing whatever the hell they wanted for a week, and met Gwen in the hall. She was worrying her lip between her teeth when they saw her, but she instantly relaxed and raised a questioning eyebrow when she saw the grins on their faces, and Morgana explained what had happened.

It was that evening, whilst relaxing in Arthur’s chambers, that Merlin heard the dreaded echo of “Emrys...” in his head.

He groaned, dropping his head in his hands, out of both frustration and the pain of another’s voice unexpectedly materializing on the inside of one’s skull.

It was just Arthur and Merlin in the room, and the Prince immediately moved from his own chair to kneel in front of his soulmate, running his hands up and down Merlin’s arms as he shakily asks:

“Merls? What’s wrong?”

Merlin just looks up at him blearily, one hand taking Arthur’s and the other rubbing his temple:

“Fucking... scaly arsehole.”

Arthur tenses and frowns as he answers:

“I thought he had given up months ago? Why is he calling you now?”

Merlin shrugs, slumping back in his seat:

“Who knows, he didn’t say, he just-”

“It’s important, bring your little... friends, if it makes you feel any better.”

“-never mind. He just said it’s important, and I can bring my “little friends” if I want.-”

He snorted in dry amusement before continuing:

“-as if I would’ve listened if he told me to go alone anyway. I really thought that me thinking “Fuck Off” as loud as I could helped him get the hint. Apparently not.”

Arthur rolled his eyes before looking to Merlin in concern:

“Well... do you want to go? Or do you want to just hope he goes away again?”

Merlin sighs, but before he can answer, the voice echoes once again:

“I will not go away this time, young Warlock. This is important, and I have very little else to entertain myself with, other than being an annoyance to you. Come.”

He huffs in frustration, standing abruptly and taking Arthur’s hand, dragging him to where their swords are kept as he grumbles:

“He’s not going away this time. Let’s fetch Leon and head down.”

Arthur dutifully follows, strapping his sword to his hip and locking the chamber doors behind them, not speaking until they were approaching Leon’s door:

“No Morgana or Gwen?”

Merlin halts, clenching his hands tightly as he thinks for a moment:

“Hmm. No, I don’t want to freak them out. We can tell them what happens later, but I don’t want Morgana to have to face him again.”

Arthur nods, and knocks quietly on Leon’s door. He opens quickly, and Arthur and Merlin are thankful that they didn’t wake him, though quickly notice his panic when he sees their grave faces and swords.

The explanation is quick, and within a few minutes the trio are making a stealthy journey down to the Dragon’s Lair. There are no dramatic appearances this time, the great lizard is already perched regally on the edge of the platform, waiting for them.

He tilts his head when he sees their tense forms at the gate:

“I’m grateful that you did not bring the Witch.”

Arthur and Leon look to Merlin in confusion as he bristles, tightening his grip on the sword at his hip as he speaks:

“Yeah, well, I didn’t fancy you trying to kill my best friend again. What do you want?”

The dragon does what the trio guesses is the closest to an eye roll and dramatic sigh that his great form can manage, before lowering his head and speaking in English:

“If you won’t listen to me, I suggest you use your new found, though temporary freedom to meet with the Druids. They have all relevant information on the prophecies, you can learn of your destinies from them. The closest camp is a day’s ride from the Eastern border of Camelot.”

Merlin raises an eyebrow, but Arthur beats him to it:

“And how would you know that? How did you know we had time off?”

The dragon tilts his head and huffs out a dry laugh, the hot air making the trio sweat under their thick cloaks (it may have been Spring, but it was still cold) :

“I know a great many things, young King.”

Merlin and Arthur can practically feel the way Leon tenses, even from a  few paces away. The man, ever the knight, was obviously incredibly uncomfortable with the idea that this dragon knew the goings on of the world, could listen in on conversations, all while being chained in the basement. Before either knight can say anything, Merlin tilts his head, a challenging look on his face as he regards the dragon:

“You... you keep saying destiny, but destiny is pre-written, the whole point is that it’s going to happen no matter what anyone involved does, no matter the interference. So why are you so desperate to have us know it, and work towards it? Us knowing or not knowing won’t alter things either way, unless it’s all a pile of shit and you’re manipulating us.”

Arthur smirks at Merlin’s quick mind and Leon looks impressed, the two of them turning their own challenging gazes on the rather thoughtful looking reptile. He mutters something along the lines of “you weren’t so bloody clever last time,” before lowering himself even closer to the ground, closer to Merlin:

“If I were manipulating you, then I wouldn’t send you to a third party known for being pacifist and unbiased, would I? Destiny isn’t completely certain, it is simply one of many likelihoods, the most... benefitting likelihood, is the destiny of you and your soulmate.”

Merlin scowls:

“Benefitting for who? Something tells me that one day you’re going to ask us for something, and we’ll be powerless to say no, thanks to all this... help you’re giving us, and it’ll be a mistake. So, benefitting who?”

The dragon shifts his jaw in such a way that resembles a smirk, speaking once again in the rasping language that Leon and Arthur don’t understand:

“Do you not want magic, yourself, your people, to be free, Emrys?”

He raises himself to his full height, stalking towards the ledge and stretching his leathery wings out. The trio manage to hold their ground in his dauntingly large presence, but their hands do tighten around their weapons:

“Go to the Druids, tell them Kilgharrah sent you.”

With that, he tips himself over the edge, falling for a second before snapping his wings out once again and shooting upwards towards the shadow-bathed ceiling, thick chain clanging loudly with the sudden movement.

Merlin huffs and turns to ascend the steps without another word, grumbling to himself about “stupid fucking dragons” and “my one week off and I have to deal with this shit” . Leon and Arthur look to each other with a shrug and a mix of genuine concern and mild amusement on their faces, before hurriedly following Merlin back through the castle.

~

Thankfully, it took almost no effort for Arthur and Morgana to get Uther to allow them to leave the Kingdom on their little vacation. It being under the guise of “visiting Ealdor” meant that it was perfectly within the realm of reasonable requests to have Leon tag along as “protection” as well. Guinevere was coming because they of course would need a servant whilst they were out and about (though Uther was definitely beginning to suspect that something more was at play between Morgana and the serving girl).

Unfortunately, Hunith was unable to get the week off work at such short notice (mother of the Prince’s soulmate or not), and there was no way they’d be able to justify asking The King for Gaius to tag along, so they didn’t even try. But they set out the next afternoon, having filled Gwen and Morgana in on Kilgharrah’s rather vague and annoying directions.

Neither of them were particularly happy that they had gone to see the Dragon without them or that they were just... doing what he said, but destiny or no, consulting the Druids on Morgana’s visions and Merlin’s magic was still a good idea, and they’d never get a better chance.

Just like Kilgharrah said, they found the Druid camp two days into their journey from the city, almost a day’s ride beyond Camelot’s border. They had to be careful, wear disguises, but they were travelling through virtually untouched wood so they didn’t run into anyone, not even a pesky group of bandits made an appearance.

When the first tents came into sight through the trees, the group stopped to take a breath and prepare themselves, giving each other one last round of dubious looks before beginning to walk again.

They barely make it to their third step when Merlin pauses and takes a stuttering breath, clenching his fingers around Arthur’s sleeve in a white-knuckled grip. The others crowd around him worriedly, but relax (only slightly) when he looks more confused than anything else. Before they can ask what’s wrong, he peers between them towards the tents:

“Uh... how are you- are you Druid? Is this one of you?”

Arthur’s eyes widen as he realises:

“Someone’s in your head again?”

Merlin nods distractedly but doesn’t move his gaze, speaking louder:

“Hello??”

Finally, a middle-aged man steps out from the camp; he wears floor length, dark green robes, and his silver hair almost falls to his shoulders. He gives the group a kind smile before finally focusing in on Arthur and Merlin, bowing his head slightly:

“My Lords. Our seers saw you coming some days ago, and we felt your presence the moment you entered our wood, Emrys.”

Merlin clenches his jaw slightly:

“Please don’t call me that, my name is Merlin... and... Kilgharrah sent us?”

He says it as if it’s a question and the Druid gives Merlin an assessing gaze, before nodding slightly. Before he can verbally respond, Leon steps subtly in front of the others. Morgana rolls her eyes at his protectiveness and Arthur huffs, but before they can challenge him, he asks:

“What do you mean, you felt his presence?”

He tilts his head again and smiles slightly, as though amused:

“Em- Merlin is rather powerful; we can sense him from miles away, his magic is incredibly... distinctive.”

Merlin frowns, holding Arthur’s hand protectively in his own as he side-steps Leon:

“What does that even mean? I’m not that powerful.”

The man shakes his head slightly and gestures behind him:

“Come. I imagine you have many questions about many things. The camp awaits your presence, My Lord.”

Merlin frowns at the title, but the Druid turns his back and begins walking back into the centre of the camp before he can challenge it. He gives a small shrug and a quiet “well, here we go” to the others before following his trail, Arthur’s hand still clutched tightly in his.

They all receive peculiar looks as they walk through the camp. Life seems to stop as everyone pauses what they’re doing to stare at the intruding teenagers (and Leon), but they keep their heads down, all letting out a relieved sigh when the man leads them to a tent, gesturing for them to sit around a table, and closing the fabric gently behind him.

He turns around with relaxed shoulders and an easy smile, not acknowledging that none of them are sat down and are instead gathered in a huddle by the table:

“My name is Iseldir. Druids don’t have strict hierarchies, but I’m considered the chieftain here, welcome.”

He looks at Merlin as he speaks, and the young Warlock nods slightly. He opens his mouth to speak, but shuts it again with furrowed brows; Iseldir raises an eyebrow and Merlin hums thoughtfully before trying again:

“I was going to introduce everyone, but something tells me that you already know who we are.”

Iseldir smiles again and nods, the expression on his face looking something similar to pride:

“Yes, I know who you all are. I see that you are learning to trust your instincts, My Lord.”

Merlin grimaces:

“It’s just Merlin, please. It’s bad enough that everyone at the castle calls me Lord now, I’m not even of age yet.”

The Chieftain’s smile widens in amusement as he nods, and Morgana is the next to speak up, her hand clutched tightly in Gwen’s as her voice shakes only slightly:

“We were sent here to learn about our... destinies?”

Iseldir nods, politely ignoring the way Merlin reaches behind him to grab Morgana’s wrist comfortingly, and how Leon and Arthur rest their hands near their swords:

“I have everything we need laid out here; it isn’t too complicated and we should get through all of it by this evening.”

The teenagers finally move to the seats, but make no effort to hide the way they shuffle the furniture to be sat closer together. Morgana and Merlin are sat in the middle, Arthur and Gwen flanking them protectively; Leon remains standing, a hand on each of his magical kid’s shoulders and a blank, though slightly challenging look on his face. Iseldir raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t comment, moving to sit on the opposite side of the table and shuffling a few papers around before looking up with a smile:

“Let us begin.”

~

The general mood of the room could be judged accurately by how tense Leon was at any one moment. Though he remained standing, he was relaxed and curious when Iseldir told them about the extent of Merlin’s powers (which Merlin looked incredibly dubious at), and he smiled proudly when they were told of Merlin and Arthur’s intertwined destinies (the nature of their soul-bond means he already knew they had some sort of great future, and this only proved it). 

It was when Iseldir hesitated slightly as he gave Morgana a pitying look that Leon tensed up, and tightened his grip on her shoulder.

“You must all remember that destinies are... tricky. They are incredibly difficult to avoid, but it isn’t impossible; the future is not set in stone.-”

Morgana takes a deep breath and straightens her back, taking Merlin’s hand in her own and settling her face into a determined grimace:

“Just come out with it. Just tell me.”

Iseldir gives her a comforting smile as he nods, turning a sheet of incredibly ancient looking paper over and pushing it across the table towards them. On the scroll is a old, rough charcoal drawing of a woman with long, dark hair, her clothes somehow elegant and tatty at the same time. Her face is covered by a hood, but her arms are outstretched and violent looking flames extend from her hands, burning and destroying all the foliage drawn around the edge of the paper.

Morgana reaches a shaking hand out to touch the drawing but withdraws her hand before she makes contact, ignoring the tears gathering in her eyes as she looks up at Iseldir again:

“That’s me, isn’t it? Burning things?”

Iseldir nods slowly before speaking, his voice low and gentle, understanding:

“It is said that if you come into your full power, you will unite with The Once and Future King’s Bane. Your heart will freeze over, you will become consumed by hatred and fear and bitterness, and you will work tirelessly to bring about the downfall of Camelot, the downfall of Albion.-”

Arthur interrupts:

“Albion?”

Iseldir moves his gaze to the Prince, giving him a tight smile as he explains:

“The Kingdoms to be united under one name, Albion, with yourself as King.-”

He looks back to Morgana, his smiles turning just a little encouraging:

“-Like I said, the future is not set in stone. Arthur’s Bane came into existence several years ago, we’re keeping close watch on him; he has yet to show any... troubling, signs, nor have you.”

Merlin scowls slightly in though, before slowly saying:

“Arthur’s Bane is... a person?”

Iseldir raises an eyebrow and nods, letting out a breath of subtle relief when Merlin seems more genuinely worried than murderous.

Gwen is the next to speak up, her voice strong and her face determined:

“None of that is happening,-”

She reaches forward and aggressively turns the scroll over, squeezing Morgana’s hand as she continues:

“-not ever.”

Leon’s gasp has everyone’s eyes drawn to the overturned sheet, only to see a colourful image appear on the paper. The first figure to materialize is clearly Morgana, though in this drawing she is grinning, hood down, eyes golden and flowers in her hair. Next, Merlin and Gwen appear either side of her, Merlin’s eyes also glowing as he summons matching flowers in Gwen’s hair, Gwen who is pressing a kiss to Morgana’s cheek. Leon and Arthur appear next, in full armour with bright grins, a golden crown on Arthur’s head.

Iseldir chuckles, looking up at Merlin who is giving himself a satisfied nod as the golden glow fades from his eyes:

“Trusting your instincts indeed; you didn’t even need an incantation, very impressive.”

Merlin shrugs before turning to Morgana with a grin. She returns it with a shaky one of her own, once again feeling not-quite-so-scared thanks to the ever-comforting presence of her family.

~

They slept that night in a large tent that had been prepared for them, and were woken up early the next morning. They were given a proper tour of the camp and introduced to a few people. 

Leon had questions about how the camp was run, in terms of enforcing rules and staying safe, so he was quickly introduced to a few of the elders. Whilst he had been reluctant to leave the others at first, Arthur’s teasing laughter and Morgana’s rolled eyes convinced him to spend the day away from them, learning about as much of Druid politics as he could.

Merlin and Morgana were quickly introduced to the strongest magic users, and whilst Merlin was taken aside to be given some lessons on healing using magic, Morgana was taught meditation techniques and breathing exercises by the camp’s most respected Seer.

Gwen sticks mostly with Merlin; whilst she had no magic to heal with, the herbal knowledge that was being shared was fascinating and she was eager to memorise as much of it as possible. She of course wandered over to check on Morgana occasionally, at first out of concern, but then out of pride, out of a desperation to never forget how relaxed and happy and at-home her soulmate looks.

Arthur spends the morning with Merlin, but quickly grows bored. Perhaps he should take more interest in healing considering how often he and the knights get injured, but he’s already got Merlin, Gaius, and now Gwen, so why waste the effort? Instead, he finds Morgana and the Seer. The sense of relief he feels to see his sister looking so at ease with such an easy smile gracing her face is almost overwhelming, but he doesn’t disturb them, sitting a little way away and silently watching them.

The Prince didn’t even realise he had fallen asleep until the tell-tale pop and the sudden shadow of someone stood above him jolts him from his nap. He opens his eyes blearily to see Merlin crouching next to him, an amused smile on his face and his hand out-stretched:

“Come on sleepy head, the others are waiting for us, it’s time to eat.”

Arthur takes a deep breath, allowing Merlin to pull him up before he stretches and rubs the sleep from his eyes. The sun was only an hour or so away from touching the horizon and he could see no one else in the little patch of woods Morgana had previously been sat in:

“Morgana?”

Merlin smiles softly, taking Arthur’s hand and leading him back towards the tents:

“Happy. She joined me a couple hours ago and we were practicing some simple spells, turns out she has more magic than just visions-”

At Arthur’s slightly affronted expression, Merlin chuckles and rolls his eyes:

“-You were exhausted, Arthur, don’t deny it. You got this holiday because of how hard you’ve been working, we didn’t want to wake you. We’ll show you a few tricks tomorrow alright?”

Arthur pouts and huffs slightly, fighting the smile trying to appear on his face as he nodded his agreement. Merlin just laughed at him again as they entered the meal tent, finding spaces with the other three.

~

The next morning was just as relaxed, though this time the five of them stayed together. 

Leon, Arthur, and Gwen sat against a fallen log as they watched Merlin and Morgana show their magic off. A small audience of Druids had gathered as well, on account of Lord Emrys’ presence, and whilst Morgana tired quickly, not used to having such free access to the magic that had been inside her for years, Merlin could go for hours. He used few actual incantations, manipulating water and flowers and floating lights with just a little concentration and some imprecise waving of his hands. 

Noon, unfortunately, came rather quickly, at which point Leon sighed and stood up, giving Merlin a sad smile before looking to Arthur:

“If we want to be home with a day to spare, we should start the journey soon.”

Arthur nodded in agreement and the rest of the group joins Leon in standing. The Druids disperse fairly quickly, but Iseldir stays with them, giving Merlin a pat on the back and a wide smile:

“It was a pleasure to have you here My Lor- Merlin.”

Merlin snorts in amusements but nods his appreciation, and the five of them wander over to their tent to gather their belongings whilst Iseldir collects the horses. 

It’s only half a candle mark before they’re riding back out into the forest in the direction of Camelot. The teachers and elders, including Iseldir, wave them off with proud smiles, and whilst Merlin and Morgana are sad to leave this sanctuary behind, they were grateful for the freedom and safety and lessons they’d had, even if it was less than two days. Their utter faith that things would change when Arthur took the crown, that one day Camelot would feel just as safe, gave them something beautiful to look forward to as well.

Their journey home was just as uneventful as the journey out. When they finally pulled up into the courtyard with a day and a half of their free week left, Leon took everyone’s horses to the stable and informed a servant to tell the King of their arrival, whilst the others headed straight to Merlin and Hunith’s house. They had to wait for Hunith and Gaius to finish their actual jobs, but soon enough the whole group was crowded around the kitchen table. 

Arthur and Gwen (who, though no one else would admit it, has the best memory of all of them) re-tell the prophecies and destinies.

Both Hunith and Gaius were furious once again at Morgana’s so-called destiny, but smiled proudly at her determined disposition, and the obviously magical drawing (the flowers seemed to move and the golden eyes definitely glowed off of the page) that Merlin pulled from his pocket. The others hadn’t even realised he’d kept it, but are grateful.

Next, Merlin and Morgana talk about their lessons. Gaius was intrigued by the healing knowledge Merlin and Gwen had gained, and after double checking that the door was locked and the curtains were drawn, they even showed off a few spells to their captive audience.

(There were times that Merlin showing off even the slightest bit of magic would give Hunith a heart attack and nightmares for days; she finds it doesn’t bother her so much anymore. She knows that Arthur, Morgana, Leon, and Gwen would never let anything happen to him, and the new stories of his apparent great power certainly helped ease her mind as well.)

Finally, Leon spoke about what he had learned from the elders; all bout how they keep camps running, their democracy, and how knowledge is preserved and passed on. It was a little boring, if any of them are being honest, but the bright grin on the knight’s face kept them from interrupting him.

Eventually, it came time for everyone to head to their respective beds and sleep. There was no denying that they’d had an amazing few days, but it was also a few days of constant activity and sleeping rough... they were all exhausted. 

As Arthur and Merlin curled up under the covers, grateful for the slightly chilled night making cuddling easier, they let out simultaneous breaths of relief.

Arthur ran a hand through Merlin’s hair softly as he quietly spoke, aware of Hunith asleep in the next room:

“You think we’ll be alright?”

Merlin sighs and Arthur tries not to let the anxiety in his stomach swirl too violently at the lengthening silence. Finally, Merlin turns over to face his soulmate, shuffling even impossibly closer and giving Arthur a small smile. Arthur doesn’t comment on the nerves in the younger man’s eyes:

“There’s all this pressure on us to fulfil our destinies, to save the world, it’s a little... overwhelming. My whole childhood I tried to forget the fact that being Prince Arthur Pendragon’s magical soulmate would mean... everything, in one way or another, some day. And now that day is fast approaching, I can feel it, and I still have no clue what I’m doing. And that’s not even considering Morgana.-”

Arthur’s hold around Merlin tenses at the mention of his sister, and Merlin presses a soft kiss to the underside of his jaw before continuing:

“-I would give up all of it, everything, to save her. To see her happy. But... do I really have the right to make that decision? My people are counting on me, but you and Morgana and Leon and Gwen, you come first, and you always will.-”

Merlin rolls onto his back again, staring at the ceiling with furrowed brows as Arthur watches him mournfully:

“-I’ve spent so long being terrified of the fact that I know you would give up your crown if I just asked you to, and now I’m close to making the same decision myself; giving up everything for one person, to the detriment of the world.-”

He turns his head to face Arthur again, tears in his eyes:

“-I don’t know what to do, Arthur.”

The Prince clenches his jaw, having to push down the swell of anger at... everyone really. Kilgharrah, the Druids, the Gods, whosever idea this whole destiny shit was. Arthur often thought of himself as a fully matured adult whose place in the world was clear, but at times like these, he’s reminded of how young he is, and how Merlin is even younger.

He pulls the Warlock into a tight embrace, tucking his dark hair under his chin and running a soft hand over his back:

“I will stand by you, always, and we’ll figure it out, we always do. The future is fluid, Merls, we just have to keep an open mind and push through. We’ve all been through a little bit of hell, but that day? That you can feel approaching? That’s the day we change the world. I’ll force my father from the throne if that’s what it takes,-”

Arthur feels Merlin tense to argue, but rushes on before he can say anything:

“-not just for you, but because it will be the right thing to do, one day. This Kingdom, and then the world, will be golden, and the five of us, and Gaius and your mum, will be together every single step of the way. Ok? You don’t have to do anything, Merlin, not alone, not ever.”

Merlin relaxes again, and Arthur can feel his sigh of relief across his collarbones. The room goes silent for a while, and Arthur only just hears Merlin’s quiet words before he slips into a sleep filled with peaceful dreams full of meadows and flower crowns and golden eyes:

“Yeah... I think we’ll be alright.”

~

THE END!!

After thinking about it for a few days, and re-reading the series, I’ve decided that I actually like the ending here!

I hope y’all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it, thanks anon for sending the idea to me all those months ago! :)

[dameronology]

love in the time of PTA meetings {marcus moreno} - 1/5

summary: despite what pinterest shows, being in a parent in the twenty first century is hard; especially a single parent. your kid takes up your entire life and the idea of finding a fairy tale is laughable - that is until you finally attend a p.t.a meeting and cross paths with a certain marcus moreno.  {series masterlist}

warnings: i do not have children. i don’t know children work. this written entirely what i have seen them do in the sims 4. also, swearing. 

- jazz

Leaving work early was never a good look.

Leaving work early because your child had managed to set fire to a trash can was...well, it was something else entirely.

After rushing out of a very important meeting and parking your car in a did-you-park-it-or-crash-it manner, you were sprinting across the play ground and towards the front entrance. Having given up half way through, you’d kicked your stupidly high heels off and held them in one hand, trying to organise your slightly disheveled hair as you entered the building. Most parents might have been nervous to collect their kid after a call from the principle, but this was a regular Tuesday for you. Jack was a good kid, perhaps just a little...misguided. In your books, it was impressive that a five year old had managed to discover pyrotechnics, though you sensed the school might have been a little less lenient about it. 

‘Hey!’ You greeted the principle with a smile as you breezed through the doors. 

Jack was in a chair by the front desk, a gleeful look on his face when he saw you. As far as he knew or cared, he got to go home early and watch Paw Patrol for the rest of the day. 

‘Afternoon.’ He replied. ‘You’re lucky it was only a phone call.’

‘I know, I know.’ You grumbled. ‘I’m sorry. He’s...adventurous-’

‘ - he singed off his class mate’s eyebrows!’ The principle cut you off. ‘Given Monday’s biting incident, I see it fit that Jack take the rest of the week off.’

‘Right.’ You sighed. ‘Thank you. And sorry again.’

‘I’ll email you a list of...behavioural specialists.’ He muttered.

‘There’s nothing wrong with my kid. He’s just...curious.’ You insisted. ‘C’mon, buddy. Let’s go home.’

Jack sprung up from the chair, taking your hand in his and skipping out the door beside you. Parenting had been hard enough when you’d been married, and even harder now that his dad was out of the picture. It meant that everything fell on your shoulders; school runs, packed lunches, earning money, staying sane. You barely found the time to sleep, let alone go to soccer matches or take him to extra curricular activities. It meant that the stay-at-home mums - the ones who drove minivans and had specified walking shoes and shared memes about parenting on Facebook - muttered about you. 

I heard Jack’s mum couldn’t make it to the parent-teacher association meeting because there was a divorce hearing. 

Look at the kid’s lunch! Oh the saturated fat, the horror!

What do you MEAN your five year old isn’t vegan?!

Frankly, you wanted to whack them over the head with their own damn vision boards. So what if your kid was a little rough around the edges? He’d discovered fire today! If it had been in the stone ages, that would have been impressive. The kind of thing that would have earned him a McDonald’s, had the fast food chain been around at the dawn of time. With the way things were going, paired with the fact you knew your fridge was empty, it looked like you were heading for a Happy Meal anyway. 

‘So do I get all week off?’ Jack peered up at you, tugging on your arm.

‘Yup, all week.’ You sighed. ‘But it’s not a reward, okay? It’s...’

You stopped in your tracks when you saw Marcus Moreno’s car pull up in the lot. Naturally, it was expensive and electric and perfectly between the white lines. He gave your less-than-stellar parking a frown as he breezed by - not that you noticed. Frankly, you were too busy admiring him. You saw his face more on the news than you did in person, but he was beautiful. Talk, dark, handsome and mysterious, but also...friendly and approachable. He’d held the door open for you once two years ago and that had been it for you. There had been whispers about the fact he was a widow, though you’d tried not to pay attention to them. It wasn’t anyone’s damn business. You knew he was a good dad; you’d had the chance to meet Missy when Jack had got his head stuck between the playground fence and she’d helped pull him out. She was sweet and well-behaved and clearly well brought up. Could you say the same for your own kid? Eh, parenting was all trial and error. 

‘It’s what?’ Your son’s voice dragged you back to reality. ‘Am in trouble?’

‘What?!’ You jumped at the question. ‘No, I just...’

‘Because Principle Eikner said I’d done something bad.’

A small sigh escaped your mouth; placing his backpack on the ground, you knelt down to his height, gently placing your hands on his shoulder. ‘You haven’t done anything wrong, little man. We're just gonna take a few days out to talk about the rules and what it means to do the right thing, okay?’

‘Dad always said not to listen to the rules.’

‘Your dad said a lot of things.’ You reminded him. You stood back up, offering your hand to him. ‘Let’s go home.’

After a few minutes of bartering and the promise of a McDonald’s, you finally made your way back to the car, now with Jack attached to your back. If giving him a piggy back ride meant getting home quicker, it was a price you were willing to pay, especially since the other mums were starting to arrive to pick up their kids. The parking lot was slowly filling up with minivans - compared to your decade-old Honda Civic. It had seen better days, and one too many run ins with other cars and parking lot bollards. Still, it got the job done. 

‘Oh, I’m so glad to see you!’ You froze in your tracks again. This time, it wasn’t because of Marcus Moreno’s otherworldly presence, but rather due to the sound of the resident soccer mum. 

‘Carol.’ You turned around to face her (slowly, given the five year old on your back) with a forced smile on your face. ‘Hi.’

‘I take it you’re here for the parent-teacher’s association meeting?’ She gave you a phoney grin, handing you a leaflet. ‘I know you couldn’t make the last one, because of your...d-i-v-o-r-c-e hearings.’ 

‘I can spell!’ Jack chirped from behind you.

‘It’s okay, buddy.’ You reached up to ruffle his hair, smile not faltering. ‘But yeah, you’re right. And what about it?’

‘Nothing.’ Carol quickly shook her head. ‘So you are coming to this one? It starts in ten minutes.’

Truth be told, you’d no idea there was even a meeting tonight. You usually ignored the damn things until the news letter came out, and then you could read it from the comfort of your sofa with a glass of wine. There was nothing you stopping going tonight, aside from your intense hatred for them. 

‘I wanna get home and watch South Park!’ Jack chirped from behind you.

‘I don’t - I mean...I don’t let my five year old watch South Park.’ You said. ‘He walked in on me watching it one time and...point is, yes, I’m here for the meeting!’

‘No, you’re not-’

‘- Jack, just sssh!’ 

Carol blinked in surprise, but her phoney smile returned a moment later. ‘Excellent! I’ll see you inside.’

You inwardly groaned. Why had you just done that? You fucking despised sitting in a stuffy gym for the better part of an hour, listening to the perfect mums bang on about healthy eating and limiting their kids’ internet time. You already questioned your parenting skills as it was - the meetings only made it worst. You didn’t assimilate into that crowd; they were all married, with big houses out in the ‘burbs and bank accounts that could cover their kids ever-expanding interests and activities. Meanwhile, you were living on one wage and your two-bedroom apartment had a balcony, not a back garden. If Jack wanted to go on a field trip, you usually had to save up for months. You didn’t know if you envied the other mums’ lives, but you certainly weren’t jealous of how they viewed working mums and single parents. 

‘That lady is mean.’ Jack murmured from your shoulders.

‘Yeah buddy, I know.’ You nodded. ‘Guess we’re going back to school.’

--

Lugging the kid and his bag back up the school yard and towards the building was exhausting - at least it was your work out for the week done. By the time you’d reached the gym and placed Jack back on the ground, your shoulders were aching and you were disappointed to see that the refreshments didn’t have any alcohol. Was it too late to sneak out? The fire exit was right there and-

‘- shame this thing doesn’t have any wine, huh?’ A man was stood next to you, arms folded across his chest as he stared at the luke-warm jug of coffee on the table ahead. 

Tall, dark hair, stubble and with a faint hint of expensive aftershave you pretended not to notice? Hello, Marcus Moreno. Goodbye, ability to form coherent sentences.

You blinked in surprise. ‘Yeah. I could do with a glass. Or ten.’

‘So you hate these things too, huh?’ He smiled. 

‘With a passion.’ You returned the gesture. ‘I’m only here because Carol and her Karen Committee kept muttering about me not being at the last one.’

‘Yeah, same here. I was attending an emergency meeting about nuclear arms in Vienna, but I guess this is more important.’

‘I was...’ in court, signing documents to end my marriage, ‘otherwise occupied too.’

Marcus nodded in understanding. ‘Kids alone are a full time job, huh? ‘Specially when you’re the only one who’s running around after them.’

He knew about your situation and in return, figured that you knew about his. He’d heard the whispers about the divorce and presumed that the loss of his wife had been subject to similar gossip. The environment amongst the parents was shockingly similar to high school and things got around pretty quickly. You both hated it, especially given the nature of both your circumstances; death and separation was not something other people should have been talking about. Especially when you all you wanted to do was mind your own business and raise your damn (chaotic) kid.

‘Yeah, tell me about it.’ You replied. ‘My kid is like...a baby crackhead, as well. He’s been sent home twice this week and it’s only Wednesday.’

‘Oh, Jack’s your kid?’

You let out a groan, holding your face in your hands. ‘Yeah. Famously so, apparently.’

‘No, it’s not a bad thing!’ Marcus chuckled, pulling your hands away. ‘He played a brilliant baby Jesus in the Nativity last year.’

‘Aside from when he bit one of the three wise men, yeah.’ You could feel your cheeks heating up. ‘Missy actually helped him once. She seems really...not at all like my child. Which is good.’

‘She told me about the fence incident.’ He nodded. ‘May I ask why he was shoving his head out of the school gates?’

‘He saw an interesting looking slug.’ You replied.

Your conversation was interrupted by Carol, who had now climbed up on stage. She tapped the microphone and cleared her throat, gesturing to everyone to sit down so that the meeting could start. You wanted to curse her. Whatever giddy conversation you were having with Marcus was a thousand times more interesting than the PTA. At least you could revel in the fact he didn’t want to be here either.

‘Shall we?’ Marcus gestured to two empty seats a few rows back.

‘I mean, it’s an aisle seat, which is good for a quick escape if Jack decides to be Jack,’ you nodded in agreement. ‘Hey kid, c’mon!’

Turning away from the other kids, Jack sprinted towards you, hurling himself into your lap as he sat down. You let out an oof! and a groan. He wasn’t as light as he used to be a toddler. He stayed still for a moment, tiny hands clasping yours, before he realised who you were sat next to. The kids’ impression of Marcus was not quite the same as yours - he’d only seen him on TV, with the likes of all the heroes. You couldn’t remember their names (but in your defence, they were kind of ridiculous). 

‘Are you a superhero?’ He reached up, poking Marcus in the cheek. 

‘Jack!’ You hissed. ‘You can’t-’

‘- yeah, buddy.’ Marcus ruffled his hair. ‘But it’s my day off today, so I’m doing all this boring stuff instead.’

‘Can you fly? Do you know Miracle Guy? Have you fought aliens? Do you have a super suit? Do you know Iron Man? Wait! Can I be a superhero?!’

‘No, yes, yes, no, no and maybe when you’re older.’ He counted the questions off on his fingers. ‘But for now we have to keep quiet for the meeting. That would make you a superhero.’

--

You wanted to marry Marcus Moreno.

Seriously, you wanted to marry him.

His little comment had kept Jack quiet the entire meeting. And it was a long fucking meeting indeed. The last time he’d shut up for that long was...probably before he learnt to talk. You loved he was full of curiosity and questions, but he didn’t always understand that there was a time and a place. At least now you knew what would shut him up. 

‘How does Miracle Guy fly? Is Batman real? Are you rich? Do you know Wonder Woman? How does her lasso of truth work?’

‘Jack.’ You groaned. 

You were walking out of the school now and down towards the car park. Missy was in tow, tapping away on her phone, whilst Jack trotted alongside you and Marcus. He’d been spewing questions at the poor man pretty much since the meeting had ended - and yet, he seemed happy to answer them. Excited, even. It was clear that he loved his job.

‘You gotta give Mr Moreno a break, little man.’ You said.

‘Hey, just Marcus is fine.’ He replied. 

‘Hey Just Marcus, I’m dad.’ Missy chimed from beside you, not even looking up from her phone. It was...impressive, actually.

‘I already regret buying her that.’ Marcus murmured. 

The two of you eventually reached your cars. The Civic was still terribly parked across two spaces - you were a good driver, you’d just been in a rush. The dents and scrapes all over the doors and bumper implied other wise but hey, we move. You had a thousand and one other things to save up before a new car. Putting down the deposit on a house - one you could actually own, maybe a little further out from the city - was your number one concern. Paying off your divorce attorney came after that. 

‘It was nice to meet you properly.’ You pulled your keys out your back, tugging four empty packets of crisps and three bags of gummy worms with it. 

‘I’m not done asking questions-’

‘- you gotta let Marcus go, JJ.’ You peered down at Jack. ‘Sorry. He’s a little obsessed with the Heroics, but I guess you’ve worked that one out.’

‘Can I visit your base?’ He continued, ignoring you. 

Marcus knelt down to his height, a grin on his face. ‘I’ve got a free window tomorrow afternoon. You wanna come by? Your mum tells me you’re off school for the rest of the week.’ 

‘Really?’ You blinked in surprise. ‘I mean, I’m sure he would love that but I’m at work and he’s gotta go to my mum’s.’

Your mother also doubled up as your baby-sitter. In an ideal world, you would have been able to afford a professional, but this was very much the opposite of an ideal world. It was the real world, and you were constantly juggling a thousand things at once. Never in a million years would you have changed it but there were days when you wanted to cry. When it was 9PM and Jack suddenly chimed in that he had a science project due the next day, or when he refused to eat his dinner because his chicken nuggets weren’t shaped like dinosaurs and fed them to the dog. 

Marcus looked, on the surface at least, like he had his shit together. He worked in a public facing job and he always looked put together. His car wasn’t covered in bumps and bruises and the inside probably wasn’t covered in yoghurt like yours. He seemed as though he got more than five hours sleep a night and his child was well-behaved. 

‘I’m sure we can work something out.’ He said. ‘If you give me your number, I’ll give you a call.’

‘Uh, yeah! Of course.’ He’d asked for your number. No big deal. 

You switched phones - naturally, his was much more high-tech than yours - and entered in your respective numbers. The whole thing made you admire Marcus even more; he didn’t have to have your tyrannical son over to his office, yet he offered to. He’d clearly seen how excited he’d gotten and it seemed like he’d found it endearing. 

‘Are you okay?’ Marcus asked quietly, suddenly putting his hand on your shoulder. ‘You suddenly zoned out.’

‘Yeah, sorry.’ You rubbed your eyes. ‘I got about three hours sleep last night. I would blame it on the terrible twos but I guess it’s the...fucking awful fives?’

He quickly turned his attention to Jack, opening the car door for him. ‘You wanna hop in? I’m just gonna talk to your mom about you visiting, yeah?’

'There’s Cheetos in the centre console!’ You called after him.

Once Marcus had shut the door, he turned around to face you. There was silence for a minute, and he just kind of...stared at you. You couldn’t read his expression or quite figure it out, but he had an eyebrow quirked and a look of...concern? Sympathy?

‘I recognise that look. It’s the help! I’m suddenly a single parent to a five year old and it feels like the world is eating me alive look.’ He said. ‘It’s the exact same one I had six years ago. Missy was about Jack’s age when...when it became just me and her.’

You softly smiled. ‘It’s not been easy.’

‘You’re doing a good job, okay?’ He gave your shoulder a light squeeze. ‘And if you ever need him off your hands for a few hours, I’ll gladly give him a tour of our headquarters.’

‘Thank you. So much, for both of those things.’ Your eyes fell to the ground. ‘It’s a refreshing change from Carol and her Pinterest boards and half-assed invitations to potlucks.’

‘God, I can’t stand all that.’ Marcus chuckled. 

‘I gotta get back now because I can see that Jack is about smush Cheetos over my break pedals but I’ll...’ you trailed off, forcing yourself to look at him and smile. ‘I’ll call you.’

‘I look forward to it.’ 

[soyeahitsmiddleearth]

hello! i was wondering if you could write the following request; you are a member of the Brotherhood, the most dangerous assassins league of Middle Earth. To say that the Company of Thorin Oakenshield is both impressed and intimidated is an understatement.

The Company/Reader: Killer Good Looks pt.1

Trigger Warnings: Referenced assault and child abuse, murder

----

To say you're an excellent fighter would be a gross understatement.

You're the very definition of a rogue; you like shiny things, you're stealthy, cunning, persuasive, what are we missing...? Oh! And you're also an infamous deadly assassin for hire, and you get hired alright.

You're wanted (in more ways than one), for people are always looking for someone to fulfill their dirty deeds for them.

Almost everything is on the table with you; you'll steal things for people (and yourself), kill if the price is right, infiltrate and lie, and many other things, however, there are some things off limits.

For example, you won't kill kids. You never have and you never will, you flat out refuse; you also don't sell yourself to others for pleasure or other things of inappropriate nature; and, most importantly of all, you don't kill those whom you have a relationship with (meaning you don't kill friends, though those are few and far between).

When you were but a child your parents sold you off to put bread on their table, and you knew nothing but torment from that moment on.

For months the lady's husband would sneak into your rooms at night, and she would always pretend not to notice; she took to releasing her frustrations out on you under the false pretense that you were an issue, beating you, berating you, yelling, abusing; they were horrible people taking advantage of a 10 year old child in every way imaginable.

You felt no remorse when you finally gathered the courage to slit their throats one night, and to this day you still don't.

The news of your deeds spread quickly, for they proved to be quite shocking and a wonderful topic for conversation.

A mere child servant manages to kill their masters unseen and unheard, escaping into the night never to be seen again? That would catch anyones attention. And it certainly caught the attention of The Brotherhood.

They found you, took you in, and honed your sloppy skills to make you into the perfect, lethal weapon.

You've killed more people than you can count, stolen more than even the richest man has, and lied to everyone you've ever met at least once.

It's safe to say that you're not exactly a stand up citizen.

Your name, as well as the name of the organization who taught you all you know, is well known throughout Middle Earth which is why you were, ultimately, employed to assist and protect the line of Durin in their journey to reclaim Erebor...

Except, unbeknownst to them, you have ulterior orders from The Brotherhood regarding the operation.

Once the dragon is either confirmed dead or slain and the mountain is reclaimed, you are to kill the Durin's (and anyone else who stands in your way) and claim the mountain for The Brotherhood.

When you were first given this assignment you had no qualms with it.

Yes, dwarfs are strong, brave, and resilient, but you are fast, intelligent, and one of the best fighters in the organization because of your early start and ability to disconnect yourself from almost every situation. Also, you don't know them, any of them, and you've never had trouble killing royal, powerful people before.

It was supposed to be easy.

You joined the group in a cute little place called The Shire in a hobbit hole belonging to one Bilbo Baggins, and when you met everyone you figured that killing them would be easy, but as time went on you began to forget about your mission.

Everything started out simple. You didn't talk much and they stayed away from you for the most part; partially out of intimidation, but also from reservations on disturbing you.

You're a private person, and they'd hate to make you dislike them by being nosy or prying.

Gandalf is the only one who knows of your past, but even knowing who you truly are, he never for a second suspected what your true purpose was.

It's around the time you all leave Rivendell and return to the road when things start to change.

Thorin wanted to keep a schedule and reach the Misty Mountains before the end of the 4th week, and halfway into the 4th, you're already there are the entrance to the mountain pass.

Because the group makes such excellent time Thorin chooses to reward the group with a day and night full of rest to spend restocking supplies, regrouping, and relaxing, which is something that benefits you all greatly.

By this point, you've worked up enough 'trust' to actually sleep in short bursts around them, and you take full advantage of this day of rest to regain your strength.

At some point during the night you manage to fall asleep, and hen you wake you find that you managed to pass out for a good 4 hours.

The very first thing you notice is Dwalin sitting not far from you, and the blanket draped over your resting form.

To say you're taken off guard would be an understatement, for you never expected to be treated with such tenderness (or at least, tenderness by your definition considering the life you've lead).

"Dwalin...?" You call after a time of looking ahead, wanting to find out his motivations.

His gaze snaps over to you and a small, greeting smile falls upon his lips, "Good evening. It is mid-night, I'm sure you'd like to know."

You glance briefly up at the sky and observe the position of the moon and stars and find that he's correct, then your gaze returns to his face. "I see. What are you doing over here, though?"

The balding dwarf looks a tad more sheepish when you ask your question, and his voice contains slight embarrassment, "Well, we know you don't much like sleeping around us, or in general, so I thought that keeping watch here may help you feel even a bit safer."

Those words shock you to your very core.

"You'll always be safe with us, you should know. You protect us in waking, so the least we can do is return the favor in sleeping."

Any and all responses that come to your mind in this moment seem inadequate in comparison to his declaration, so you're left sitting there looking at him with a blank, yet dumbfounded stare.

"You needn't say anything in response. I just thought you should know." Another smile graces upon his lips, and then his attention turns back out towards the darkened tree line surrounding the mini camp in a half circle. "Sleep more if the desire is to suddenly strike you."

And, for some odd reason, you do.

---

For the first time in what has to be years, you sleep through the night and do not wake again until the sun beckons you to do so.

When the first light shines through the trees and makes the forest sparkle with morning magic, you arise and find that a new dwarf, Ori, has taken the place of Dwalin.

A feeling, one that you can't identify, rises within you, and you find yourself unable to handle it.

"Ori." You greet curtly, "I am going to depart for a time. Expect me back in 20 minutes."

The young dwarf looks up at you and nods shallowly, not even entertaining the thought that you would need an escort. "Alright. Get back safely."

His words linger with you after you leave, for the act of being cared for is alien to you.

When was the last time someone genuinely cared for your well-being and not just what they would lose if you were to perish? When was the last time someone thought of you as a person who could be harmed instead of a weapon that maybe tarnished every-so-often?

These thoughts plague your mind as you go to search the game traps you lay around the camp the morning before, and you find that the prize is well worth the early journey.

3 rabbits, 2 squirrels, and a wild hog around 2 feet long and a foot wide. The hog you caught along the way, actually. It had been sniffing around one of the game traps you sent (the trap wouldn't have been strong enough to hold it anyways), and you wasted no time in throwing a dagger straight into its' head.

You string up the rabbits into a line of rope and carry the hog over your shoulders (it's really heavy, so you made sure to evenly distribute the weight), and then you head straight for the group with your prizes in hand.

When you enter the clearing you're noticed immediately, for the game hanging from your body draw a lot of attention.

"Odin's beard!" Gloin exclaims, jumping up from his spot once his eyes fall upon you, "Look at all of that!"

All eyes are on you as soon as the red-haired dwarf alerts them to your presence, but you maintain a mask of nothing even despite your discomfort with being the center of attention.

"Where did you get all that?" Fili calls, getting up and approaching you to help carry the load.

You shrug off the line of rabbits and squirrels to him when he begins to tug on it and bring the hog to the middle of the camp, dropping it down heavily.

Bombur looks up at you with a grand smile and praises you in his low, baritone voice, "Well will you look at that! Now that's a hog."

You dip your head in acknowledgement of his compliments and offer right after, "Do you want me to skin them?"

"Oh, no, no! You have done more enough for us, we can manage that at the very least." The older dwarf assures you, patting the fat belly of the swine, "Thank you, lass. We haven't had a commendable meal in months, so this will be a real treat."

You received so many compliments and acclimations that you almost began to blush, but that's an unconscious ability that had left you a long time ago.

Everyone traveled with full bellies that afternoon, and there was plenty of leftovers to last everyone well into the next day as well.

Things like this are seldom the topic of talk or praise in the organization you work for, and you can never rely on anyone. You're all thieves, after all. Liars, tricksters, murderers... how could you trust someone like that to have your back? But... somehow, they trust you to protect them and their precious royal friends.

You: the liar, trickster, and murderer.

They sleep in your presence as if you hadn't stolen millions in treasure, product, and money; as if you hadn't killed a quarter of the people you've met in your lifetime. They trust you, the real you (or at least the realest version of you that there is), and it's a truly foreign feeling.

Of course, even though these good feelings long since lost to you have returned for a time, you keep yourself in check with the thoughts of what they would do to you if they found about your true intentions.

The images of their betrayed, angry faces, the disgust that would shine in their eyes when they realize what you're truly capable of... you're always sure to not lose sight of your end goal; the Mountain of Erebor and its' lost treasure. If you're to fail, you're certain that you'll be killed (either by the dwarfs or The Brotherhood), so you don't even entertain the thought of abandoning your mission.

---

Later in the day, during the trek up those horrible, treacherous mountains, you're approached by Bofur, the hat wearing dwarf with a smile more contagious than any sickness.

"Hello." You greet curtly when he falls into step beside you, eyeing him in your peripherals. "Is there something I can help you with?"

"Oh, no." He shakes his head no and reaches up to straighten his fur hat, "You just looked a little lonely, is all."

Lonely, huh?

You don't reply right away and look ahead with your usual blank expression and dull eyes, though you do feel an uncomfortable, appreciative feeling swell inside of you. "I am not lonely." You inform him matter-of-factly, though when you glance down at his face you see that your words have slightly hurt his feelings.

Your heart twists slightly painfully when you see his saddened countenance, and before you can even think about it you're blurting out, "But I welcome the company regardless."

His frown is immediately replaced with a brilliant smile and his eyes positively shine with enthusiasm; you never thought your acceptance would garner such a reaction from him (much less anyone for that matter).

The dwarf practically talks your ear off while the 15 of you travel up the Misty Mountains, telling you everything he possibly can about his homeland, family, and feelings regarding the journey (as well as other things), and while all this incessant blathering would normally irk you, you actually find that you quite like it.

Bofur's excited speech does eventually die down when it starts to rain, though, for he and yourself both think it safer to concentrate on the hike as its level of danger grows.

It isn't long before night falls, and once it does the rain becomes a much more dangerous obstacle.

There is lower visibility and the rocks become horribly slippery, though neither of these things could ever hope to top the giant stone beasts that begin to battle right in front of you all.

The stone giants don't seem notice any of you, and if they do then they simply don't care, and you all barely escape with your lives. They throw huge boulders bigger than any building you've ever seen, and their hand-to-hand combat leaves you all shaking against the mountainside, fearful of falling to your deaths as you sway every which way.

To your, and everyone else's luck and great joy, a little cave in the mountainside appears before you all (after a horrible death scare with half of the company), and it becomes your resting spot for the night.

You, like usual, choose a spot closest to the cave entrance with rock that covers both your back and left side and fall asleep effortlessly. You plan on only resting for four or so hours, hopefully until the rain passes, and then you can resume watch so the others may regain their strength (they're heavier and bigger than you, so they need more rest and food).

Those 4 hours (and an extra half!) pass by without issue and your internal clock eventually wakes you up.

One of the first things you see when your eyes flutter open is the stone ceiling of the cave hovering above you, and the next is Bofur who sits in the little watch spot right across from your sleeping area.

You sit up as soon as your sleep addled mind clears and your blurry eyes gain focus and call softly, "Bofur, go ahead and take a rest. I can resume your watch."

The dwarf jumps slightly when your soft voice breaks through the silence and reaches out to him, but he doesn't move to get up. Instead, a small smile upturns the corners of his lips and he whispers back, "No, you do a watch of your own every night and refuse to wake anyone else up often enough. Please, go back to sleep."

He noticed that?

You can't even keep the surprise from your face, for your eyes widen almost imperceptibly and your lips part slightly. "I..." You've been shocked speechless, something that you thought impossible.

"We have all noticed, in case you're wondering. Now, go ahead and resume sleep. I've still got another 30 minutes of watch."

And, for some reason, you don't protest.

Sleep calls to you and tugs at your eyelids, making them heavy and causing your eyes to burn. What spell have they put you under to make you tired again under a simple command, you wonder?

You fall back asleep despite yourself, but it doesn't last long, for within 20 minutes after Bilbo tries to leave and the storm begins to quiet, the floor opens beneath you all and swallows everyone whole.

[peaches-writes]

tumbles and turns

description: a month in the life of you and your college roommate, minho—except you’re from rival universities preparing for an intercollegiate cheerdance competition member: minho / lee know genre: fluff, sports au (off-season universe), college au, roommates au, slice of life, friends to lovers au word count: 7.9k warning: explicit language, mentions of food, injuries, & harassment; a very jealous and protective minho notes: ah yes another sports au about a sport i’m not well-versed in that ended up not making sense + anw whatever danceracha pep squad agenda 💅

week 1 of 4

Minho finally releases the laugh he’s been holding for the past ten minutes, shaking his head in disbelief before hopping off of the edge of the sink where he’s been quietly judging you. “Seriously,” He smirks teasingly, expertly dodging your disapproving frown and your attempt at smacking his arm as he stands between you and the mirror then takes the comb from your hands. “You look fine—kind of wonky, actually, but you’ll live.”

“Ya!” You huff with a light stomp of your foot on the bathroom tiles, reaching up for the blue comb to no avail for he immediately lifts it high above his head. “Give me the comb!”

“Why don’t you dry your hair first before worrying about how you look?” He suggests with another laugh, leaning back on the sink when you start jumping over him for the comb. “It looks weirder when you try combing it down while it’s still wet.”

You groan when he starts taunting you by waving the comb in his hands, eventually giving up to stand back and cross your arms in annoyance. “I’m so—I just feel so iffy about this haircut, that’s all!”

“Well, that’s pep squad for you—but you already know that.” He shrugs, finally putting the comb down behind him in exchange for the orange towel you abandoned a while back to obsessively comb down your bangs. “Anyway, the bangs are the least of your worries. Aren’t you guys dyeing your hair on Friday?”

“Yeah,” You sigh in frustration, lifting a hand up to rub your temple. “Our costumes department is insane, I’m telling you.”

“Try our costumes department.” Minho retorts, throwing the towel over your damp hair after. “Though we’re doing a Michael Jackson-inspired routine, the costumes still need to have our school colors. Imagine all the black and gold and the make-up we’ll have to do for one part—“

You manage to crack a smile at this as you now busy yourself with drying your hair, making Minho chuckle in front of you as well. “Ah, right. Isn’t Felix volunteering for your costumes this year, though? Why don’t you approach him if you’re so bothered?”

“Then you’ll have to see Jeongin for your hair.” He points out.

“Jeongin? Right, nevermind, then. The kid’s scary when he’s in his element.” You huff, your hand on your temple then going up to your bangs. “I’ll just have to live with this for the next 1.5 years at most, I guess.”

“Then that’s settled.” Minho shrugs for the second time, tsking after once he notices your slow pace. Taking a step forward, you then catch a glimpse of Minho picking up your hair dryer from the other side of the sink counter from the corner of your eye before plugging it on the nearest wall socket. “You’re so slow! We’re watching a movie, remember? I don’t want water dripping on the couch.”

Swiftly, you elbow his stomach when he moves to your side. “Well, I’ll have to let you know that hair doesn’t dry that quickly when you’ve bleached it twice.”

“You could’ve been a little quicker about it if you weren’t so focused on your bangs.” He scolds, carding his fingers through your hair before pointing the noisy hairdryer on you and starting with your newly-cut bangs. “What even is the reason behind the red hair, anyway?”

“It’s our school colors, dumbass.” You remind him with a scoff, removing the towel on top of your head and moving it to the opposite side of where Minho is currently working. “Naeun actually managed to find a supplier with the exact same shade of red our school uses, it’s kind of cool.”

“Not like anyone would recognize it on compet.” Minho pouts. “Green would’ve been funnier. Isn’t that your other school color?”

“Excuse you, we have one of the biggest crowds every year? Plus, green would look too wacky. It could be distracting with our theme.”

“As if people from your school go around recognizing that specific shade of red.”

“I’m going to fucking hit you with this towel.” You glower, only making him laugh as he nonchalantly guides you by your shoulders to move closer to the hairdryer’s socket. “Let’s just see who’s going to be laughing when I see you in costume on compet.”

“Please, I’ll rock the outfit so much you’ll forget you even said that.” Your roommate rolls his eyes, turning you around so he can work on the back of your head. “What will you be wearing, by the way?”

Minho steals a glance at you from the mirror, raising his eyebrows slightly, and you answer, “Still the same but in black and a new design.”

“So...top and tights?” He asks and you nod eagerly, your hair almost slipping right through his fingertips.

“You’ll love the designs.” You muse, picking up the blue comb once again to use on the dried parts of your head. ”Naeun designed them really well!” 

“A bit of a basic choice for your second to last college competition, don’t you think?” He teases, making you reach up behind you to smack his arm. “Didn’t you guys do the same thing but in navy last year?”

“Call it basic again when I take it home, I dare you.” You retort before chuckling along with him. “Are you done?”

“Almost there.” He answers automatically, slowly inching along to your other side while gently moving you closer to the wall socket and turning you around to face the opposite wall by your shoulders. “Your hair’s so hard to dry.”

“I didn’t even ask for your help.” You point out. “You just barged in here to clown my bangs.”

“Yeah, then I realized that that’s what’s taking you so long that we can’t watch our Sunday movie.” Minho huffs, finally reaching your other side to dry the last strands of your hair. “I’m being a good Samaritan for once, you should at least say thank you.”

You giggle, nodding teasingly. “Right, right. Thank you, Minhooo!” You tease, knowing very well in your almost 5 years of living with him how rare these moments indeed are. “So...done?”

After a long pause, Minho turns the hairdryer off and takes out the plug from the wall socket behind you before taking a step back away from you. “Yup, done.” He affirms, running his index finger through your bangs horizontally once with a giggle. “Your bangs are so funny.”

You frown at him, smacking his arm for the third time tonight before turning around to tidy up everything you’ve used. “I hate you.”

But your roommate only pats your head in response before taking another step back and heading to the bathroom door. “I’ll set up the movie now!” He says as he walks away, glancing back at you with a smile before crossing the other side of the open door. “Hurry up, okay?!”

-

“Take the hoodie down! Take the hoodie down!” Jisung and Minho mischievously chant by your shoe racks at the entrance once you arrive home from training at the end of the week. The two hold Soonie and Doongie respectively in front of them for emphasis, lifting the cats up and down as if they were holding banners to a sports game. “Take the hoodie down! Take the hoodie down!” 

You only roll your eyes at the two as you discard your shoes properly next to them, patting Soonie and Doongie’s heads affectionately then smacking the side of Minho’s head. “Move out of the way, losers.” You command instead with a wave of your hand and a tired giggle, the two laughing along and obligingly stepping aside for you to hang your gym bag up on the metal hooks right behind them. “And Jisung, why are you still here? It’s 9 PM.” 

“We’re finishing our game tonight and I wanted to see your new hair!” He answers in his defense, putting Soonie down when Minho does with Doongie. “Now, take the hoodie down! Take the hoodie down!” 

Taking out your plastic bag of used clothes and empty tumbler out of your gym bag after, you sigh in defeat and remove your hoodie. “Fine, fine, fine, there.”

Your roommate and his best friend both erupt in whistles and cheers at your bright red hair in response. 

“Oh damn!” Jisung exclaims more dramatically and pats your shoulders in approval, ruffling your hair after. By your socked feet, Soonie meows enthusiastically as he tries climbing up your leg.  “Look, even Soonie likes it!” 

A small step behind the younger boy, you see your roommate with a much cooler reaction, smirking at you and mouthing, “Pretty,” with a wink before vocally adding, “It’s not so bad,” when Jisung then turns to him and asks him what he thinks. “Y/N’s had far worse hairstyles before.” 

“I’m going to shove my clothes down your throat.” You threaten him with a chuckle, holding your bundle of used clothes higher as if you were going to throw it towards him. “Anyway, you’ve seen my hair now so let me through, I still have to sort these out and wash up.”

"You have dinner on the table, too, so eat before you go to bed.” Minho adds, pointing to the open doorway down the hall leading to your kitchen. 

“Did you cook?” 

“Take-out.” Minho answers plainly before gesturing for the three of you to move to the living room. You and Jisung follow him down the hallway. “Pizza and wings.”

Meanwhile, Jisung pouts at you as he links his arms with yours. “Ya, Y/N, you’re not going to watch our stream?” 

“Maybe some other time.” You frown, your tiredness slowly coming back now that your friends have naturally stopped joking around. “I’m really sleepy.” 

“Practice was that harsh?” Jisung asks next, stopping you right in the middle of the living room before you could proceed further to the left of the hallway to your room. Minho, on the other hand, walks ahead of you and proceeds to plop down on the sofa to set up their game once again. “Jeongin told me you’re changing the choreography a bit.” 

“Seungkwan injured his foot really bad so we’re adjusting for alternatives in case he doesn’t recover in time.” You nod sadly, scratching your head in frustration. “And he’s my one of my bases for most stunts, including the exhibition, so I’m making the most adjustments.”

“Oh,” Jisung muses in realization, pausing a bit before another smile graces his features as he then lifts your hoodie back up to your head. “we should play quietly, then, right Minho?” 

Minho only nods at this without even sparing a glance back at you. 

“Yup, we’ll try to be quiet!” Jisung promises again, his grin growing bigger. “Sleep well, then, Y/N!” 

“Hm, thanks, goodnight to you, I guess.” You greet him back, looking over his shoulder to see Minho glancing back up at you. “Goodnight Minho.” 

Your roommate sweetly waves goodnight to you before turning mischievous by snickering and pointing at your red hair again. You roll your eyes and quietly threaten him with your clothes again in response before bidding him and Jisung another goodnight, proceeding to your room after. 

Surprisingly, the two rowdy boys kept to their word after you’ve finished dinner and mostly whispered yelled through the walls of the living room for the rest of the night, mostly Minho scolding Jisung for cursing at their game and reminding him to quiet down for you. 

week 2 of 4

You come home from Thursday practice two hours later than usual and completely drained, trudging down the entrance hallway of your shared apartment to the rustling of your used clothes and the obnoxious empty noises of your tumbler that quickly alerts Minho and his three cats of your presence. Excitedly greeting you from the kitchen area, Minho looks up at you from feeding Soonie, Doongie, and Dori under your dining table and waves at you, his smile immediately faltering into a confused one when he sees your frown. “Hey. Are you okay? Why are you late?” He points out with a nervous chuckle. “You could’ve just called me to pick you up.” 

You don’t answer, opting instead to tiredly settle on the seat nearest to his side and resting your arms and head down on the table, missing the dinner set Minho prepared for you by a hair as you do so. “I missed the first bus home because I was distracted from being so pissed off at this newbie being a creep during practice.” You scoff as nonchalantly as you can. “It’s okay now, tho—”

“What?!” Before you could even finish your sentence, however, Minho surprisingly leaves his cats’ side, moving over to sit next to you to the side where your head is limply tilted. “Who’s this guy? What did they do?”

You shift uncomfortably in your seat at the sudden rise in Minho’s tone and then see him instinctively scooting away in response, an attempt to give you space in case you’re uncomfortable. “Do you remember Park Joon? The guy I’ve told you before who’s been hitting on me and some of my teammates since he got in the team?” You start off after and you see your roommate following you along again, this time propping an elbow up on the table and nodding along. You also see him open his mouth to speak before closing it again, gesturing for you to continue. “Coach picked him to be Seungkwan’s replacement for the stunts and we practiced our choreography for exhibition today after team practice.

“It was fine, at first, he adjusted quickly to filling in for Seungkwan and all—until in one of our final stunts, he started groping me inappropriately that my other teammates had to stop immediately once they noticed and told our coach about it.”  

"What?! What the fuck?!” Minho reacts with furrowed eyebrows and a scowl on his face. Sitting up properly now, he then worriedly asks, “W-What did—what did Coach Im do?” 

You sigh, lifting up your head up after as you tiredly prop your own elbow up to mirror him. “Coach was furious that she immediately had him kicked out of practice without even hearing his side.“ You answer shakily, carding your fingers through your hair. “She also said that she’ll report him to admin after so we won’t be hearing about the guy until graduation...” 

In front of you, Minho releases a breath you didn’t even notice he’s been holding as you speak, cautiously moving his chair towards you again and patting your back comfortingly. “That’s...fuck, I’m sorry you had to go through that...I’m glad Coach Im kicked him out after. Fuck...” He mirrors your frown, albeit sadder than your frustrated one. “Are you—I mean, do you want me to get you something? Do you need anything? I—”

“I’m fine, Minho, just annoyed now that we have to adjust everything again.” You huff, your voice shaking just slightly that Minho almost misses it. 

“The choreography’s the least of your worries now, that fucking creep just harassed you.” Minho points out softly and cautiously, meeting your eyes before hesitantly stroking your hair. “I swear, if I was there, I would’ve—”

You shake your head immediately, cutting him off with what you could muster up as an assuring smile. “Seriously...it’s fine. I’m fine—still a bit shaken but I’m kind of comforted that he got kicked out for it and that Jeongin and the others stood up for me.” You add with more conviction now because of Minho’s words. “Please don’t do anything stupid about this for me. I’m so over it right now, trust me.”

“Really? You promise?” He asks you to which you nod back in response. “Well, if you say so but—do you need anything else right now or later? I can commute with you again if you want me to or something...”

You shake your head at his last offer. “No, no, that’s really too much of a hassle for you. It’s fine. To be honest, I just want to sleep and not think about it anymore right now.” You pout after, scooting your chair closer to the meal you’ve accidentally forgotten throughout this whole conversation. “Thank you for listening and worrying, though, Minho. I really appreciate it.” 

Your roommate opens his mouth again to retort but is suddenly interrupted by Dori brushing up against your legs and purring at you. “What’s that Dori?” Your roommate asks the cat in his usual pouting tone instead, lifting the cat up and placing it on his lap. Dori, however, only fixes his gaze on you and purrs again. “Hm? You want to go to Y/N and make them feel better? Okay, okay.”

He then carefully sets the cat on your lap, standing up after to affectionately stroke your hair again. “If that’s all then eat first before you wash up and go to bed.” He then returns to his original thought before going back to the other two cats. “And do tell me if you need anything, okay?” 

“I will.” You muster up another smile to which Minho returns with a smile of his own. “Thanks again, Minho.” 

He only hums, briefly leaning forward as if to encase you in a hug before hesitating last minute and turning his attention back to his cats. “Eat your food.” 

The next day, Minho surprises you by waking up earlier and following you all the way to the bus stop with his own gym bag and backpack. 

“It’s Friday.” You point out as your bus approaches. 

He nods nonchalantly, turning to you with a smile. “Yeah, I can tell. The cafe across the street’s selling mint frappe until 10 AM.”

“No, I mean,” You shake your head. “isn’t your first class at 2 PM today?”

“Yeah?” He answers in a tone that pretends to be oblivious of where you’re taking this conversation.

“Then why are you all dressed up with your things?” At this the bus approaches, opening right in front of you and Minho. Before you could even step in the public vehicle, Minho beats you to it and takes your hand in his, pulling you along. 

“I’m meeting up with Jisung to study.” He answers belatedly to you as he swipes his bus card, stepping aside after for you to follow. 

“Bullshit.” You mumble under your breath, mirroring his actions anyway and following him to the seats right behind the driver as the bus roars back to life. “You’re in different programs, Minho.”

“You could just say ‘thank you’ and get it over with“ He teases, nudging your shoulder with his before smoothly slinging an arm over you. “And I really am meeting up with Jisung today, just after his 10 AM. He’s taking a science elective this semester and he needs help with it.”

You tilt your head towards him, seeing his anticipating expression. With an amused chuckle, you give him a side hug instead, burying your face in the material of his black hoodie and catching him off-guard. “Thank you.” 

He hugs you back with a laugh. 

-

“I know what will make you feel better!” Your roommate announces as he barges in your room unannounced the following Saturday afternoon, plopping down at the foot of your bed as you work on your term papers on the other side. “Well, at least, Chan does since he was technically the one who suggested it.”

“I feel fine, though? What are you talking about?” You raise an eyebrow at him, stealing glances over to him as you continue working.

Minho comically rolls closer to you, propping an elbow up on the mattress to stop and showing you his phone displaying his chat history with Chan. “Are you sure? Like well enough that you won’t even be bothered that Chan got us tickets to see the Hyunjin’s final game next Sunday?” He wiggles his eyebrows teasingly, snickering when your eyes widen. 

Immediately, your fingers stop typing away on your keyboard and you look up at him in purse shock. “What?!” You exclaim in disbelief, leaning closer to his phone screen and squinting your eyes at the chain of messages exchanged between your two friends. “Seriously? Didn’t this game get sold out weeks ago?”

“Yeah but, you know, Chan has his socializing ways.” Your roommate shrugs, taking his phone back to his side to clasp his hands together. “So? What do we think?”

“Um, yeah, of course, let’s go!” You answer matter-of-factly, taking his phone and typing in your reply for emphasis. “I mean, you are taking me, right? This isn’t a joke?”

“Only if I can take the other ticket.” He winks, lifting his upper body higher from the mattress to rest his chin on top of your laptop screen. “So, yes?” 

You nod enthusiastically with a giggle, making Minho jump up into a sit in joy. 

“Clear your schedule for next Sunday, Y/N! We’re watching the finals!” 

week 3 of 4

Coach Im distributes your finished costumes on your first practice of the week after her final reminders and announcements and you make sure to contain your excitement as best as you can on your commute home until after you’ve finished dinner in order to open it with an equally excited Minho. 

Eagerly, your roommate now peers over your shoulder on the sofa after having hurriedly washed the dishes, holding Dori up to his chest as he does so.

“See? It’s so pretty!” You exclaim once you’ve taken everything out of the plastic wrapping, holding up your black fitted cropped top, lined with a complex geometric pattern in colors inspired by the pride flag, for your roommate and all of his three cats to see. “It came out really well!”

Minho nods in approval at the black spandex while Dori unconsciously mirrors him when you turn to the two. “The printing didn’t fuck up Naeun’s design on the first print for once.” He muses, making you chuckle. “It looks cool.” 

“They took it to a different printing shop this time.” You clarify, laying down the top right next to a sleeping Doongie on the nearby coffee table before taking out the bottoms. “This material’s really nice, too. I tried it on with everyone a while back and the stretch is really nice.”

“I take that as I’ll see this costume being used in the gym after, then?” Minho jokes, earning him a jab on the elbow when he puts Dori down after. “What? So, pajamas?”

“You didn’t have to call me out like that!” You protest, leaning back on the couch and placing a passing Soonie on your lap. “I really like this costume.”

“Because you say that with all of your costumes!” Minho retorts, hovering Dori over your costume when the cat starts purring and tilting its head towards it.

“I happen to love everything my friends design.” You correct, chuckling at Dori who’s now escaped Minho’s grasp to sniff and snuggle into your clothes. “Now, when is that black and red vest coming in again?”

“It came today too but I won’t show it to you.” Your roommate sticks his tongue out at you, earning him a string of protests from you. “You’ll just have to see on compet day!” 

“What? No! Unfair!” You pout. 

“You’ll just have to see next week!” He insists anyway, laughing at your furrowed eyebrows and scowl. “I don’t want you getting too distracted with me when you should be focusing on memorizing your choreography, you scatterbrain.” 

“Ya! Ugh, you’re so full of yourself!” 

You find his vest in the laundry the following day, anyways, when you needed to retrieve one of your shirts from your laundry area. You make sure to tease him about it with a photo of you holding up his vest after and sending it to him through private chat. 

“Ah, so mean!” He replies. 

-

“Let’s go Hwang Hyunjin, kick some ass!” You yell as loud as you can in your seat amidst all the cheers for your friend echoing around the arena. Next to you, Minho laughs through his drink at your enthusiasm, your initial awkwardness at sitting on his university’s side of the audience for this volleyball game clearly gone now as you wildly wave your green balloon. “Wooh, go Hyunjin!” 

“God, what would our friends from your uni say when they see you cheering for our team?” He chuckles once you’ve calmed down, adjusting your white hat as you settle back comfortably in your seat once again. 

You roll your eyes at him, picking your Cola up from your respective cup holder and taking a sip. “Shut up, it’s not like I’m alone here.” You retort after, pointing at Changbin who’s with Jisung at the other end of the row. “Even Yeji’s somewhere in the crowd, too, supporting her cousin.” 

“Still, it’s not everyday you’re on this side.” He argues back, scrunching up his face again when you get momentarily distracted by Hyunjin scoring another point for his team. “Ah, you’re so hyped today! How come you never cheer like this for me?” 

“Because we’re in the same sport, Minho.” You laugh this time, catching his fake pout from the corner of your eye. “Besides, I cheer for you, too, just in a different way—woah, did you see that?! Woah, as expected of Choi Bomin!”   

Minho couldn’t say anything else to you after as you easily become occupied by the heated game again, cheering mostly for Hyunjin and occasionally Sanha who’s on the opposing team. He patiently waits for you to turn your attention back to him anyway, which only takes 3 points on his university and 4 points on Sanha’s. “Why? So, I can’t ask you to wear my school’s shirt and things like that if ever?” He asks cheekily once he’s gotten your attention again. 

You scoff against the heat rising up your neck. “W-What? Why? Are you giving them to me as pajamas?” 

He shakes his head, chuckling. “No, I mean, while on compet.” He clarifies before gesturing over to his shirt you borrowed from him today with another pout. “It’s just that you borrowed my shirt to cheer on Hyunjin today. Can’t you do that next week for me too?” 

You glance back at him incredulously, making him chuckle nervously. “If I want Jeongin to chop my head off and Seungmin to call me a traitor until awarding, then I might.” You scoff playfully, deepening his pout and puppy eyes. “Don’t pull that look on me! Where is this even coming from all of a sudden?” 

“I just thought about it.” He shrugs, warming your face even more. “Can’t you really do it? I’ll even wear your shirt if I have to.”

“Ah, just say you think I look cute in your shirt and go.” You roll your eyes jokingly, your seemingly nonchalant disposition slowly crumbling down in front of him anyway. “Minho, your secret crush on me is kind of showing, you might have to watch out for yourself on that, ha.” 

“So? What about it?” He mumbles under his breath, catching you off-guard without him meaning to. 

“What?” Your eyes widen curiously. 

“What?” He repeats, mirroring your expression in feigned innocence before his eyes slowly flit back to the game. “Oh hey, we scored again!” 

“Lee Minho!” 

“What?!” He chuckles, avoiding your gaze now as you suddenly switch roles with him cheering loudly for his university. “Go Hwang Hyunjin!” 

One of your university shirts doesn’t come back to you from the laundry after that. 

week 4 of 4 

On the Saturday night before the competition, you skip your traditional sleepaway camp and senior send-off with your team to have a sleepover in your apartment living room with your roommate, setting up sleeping bags on the floor next to Soonie, Doongie, and Dori’s beds and queueing up old competition videos on your television. Minho, on the other hand, re-heats all of the remaining leftovers in your refrigerator and buys extra side dishes and drinks from the convenience store on the first floor of your building for dinner. 

“What should we watch first?” You ask once you’ve finished eating and washing the dishes, the TV’s remote on your right hand while the other massages Dori’s head as the grey cat circles your feet. “Hm, Dori? What video do you want to dance to first?” 

Minho then re-emerges from the kitchen, stretching his limbs as he approaches you before snatching the remote and answering for Dori, “I have just the video in mind!” 

“Ya!” You glare at him, reaching up to retrieve the remote again but, as he always does, Minho immediately raises the device above his head as he scrolls down the folder of videos on the TV. “If you’re thinking about that vid, I’m going to—“

But Minho only laughs at you, quickly scrolling down the videos anyway against your attempts of stopping him until he finds your very first cheer dance routine at the bottom of the folder. “Here, found it!” He chuckles in victory after a struggle, throwing the remote on the side and pulling you close to the first part of the paired dance that serves as the choreography’s intro. “Let’s dance!”

“Nooo!” You protest, turning your eyes away from the screen as you see yourself in your Freshman year, dancing to a Jungle-themed routine, while Minho only cackles in your misery, following the steps precisely as he spins and twirls you on time before letting go.

“No, you have to do it with me!” He insists as the choreography now forces him to part with you, his gaze alternating between you and the screen. “Come on, Y/N!”

You groan under his anticipating gaze, following him and the video along after a pause in utter defeat.

“Why are you so embarrassed about this routine? You looked cute here!” He points out as you now do the group jumps, easily finding you in the video since you’re often at the center. “Besides the teased hair and the amount of black eyeshadow on your make-up, of cour—“

“I tripped the most on this routine!” You remind him just as you do trip on the way to being lifted in the video. “See?”

“You were a 1st year then, that’s totally understandable.” He dismisses anyway with a wave of his hand, the two of you stopping to watch the first sequence of lifts. “You remember when I almost fucked up my solo on the same compet because I couldn’t remember the steps towards the end?”

“Yeah but you improvised—“

“And Coach Kim made sure to have me sit out the Nationals after.” Minho rolls his eyes. The two of you then go back to dancing, laughing along to the steps you find silly and scaring your three cats by pretending to lift your hands up as if preparing to do tumbles. “Point is, we’re much better cheer dancers now than before! Look, this routine’s even easier to follow now than when you were practicing this with me 4 years ago.”

“If you put it that way, then, I guess...” You muse out loud until another thought crosses your mind. “We should play that video of yours next, then! That was the exhibition, right?”

“Fine, fine.” He sighs teasingly. “but first let’s finish this! Ah, 6 minutes is so long when it’s so focused so much on dancing!”

You then spend the rest of the night dancing to your shared old competition videos until you eventually felt sleepy (and the old couple living right under your unit started banging on the floor, their ceiling, with an umbrella).

“Kids, whatever canoodling it is you’re doing, you need to stop, it’s 2 AM!” Mr. Lee yells from his window right below yours as you and Minho fall on your sleeping bags tiredly, making the two of you laugh.

“Who even uses the word ‘canoodling’ these days?” You scoff in between uncontrollable fits of giggles, rolling over to your stomach and lazily crawling over to your pillow. “And they think we’re doing something weird again! Mr. and Mrs. Lee are sweet and all but sometimes, their minds...”

Next to you, Minho clutches his stomach as he laughs. “Why?” He smirks playfully, sitting up and scooting over to his own sleeping bag. “They’re just being old people. Does it bother you that much? Do you actually want to do something weird with me?”

You scrunch your nose in disgust up at him hovering over you, pushing him away when he tries tickling your sides. “Ew, Minho! No, get away from me!”

A few hours later, you ended up having to deal with Minho sprawled all over your sleeping area and refusing to wake up at exactly 9 AM to prepare and head out of the apartment.

“Minho.” You call his name firmly, poking his arm draped over your waist. “Come on, you big baby, or the cats are gonna eat you for breakfast.”

“Nooo, 5 more minutes.” He whines tiredly, unconsciously snuggling up to your neck when Doongie and Soonie pass by his face, slapping their tails across his cheeks. “I’m so tired from last night.”

“I told you not to put on that video of yours from last season.” You scold, finally managing to lift his hand and kick his leg away from you. “Whatever, I’m feeding the cats. You get up and cook breakfast, okay?”

“In a bit.” He waves you off, rolling over to his stomach and grabbing the nearest cat, in his case Doongie.

-

Minho was right in that he really works his team’s outfit even when he’s not fully fond of it, you realize six hours later when you meet again at the competition’s venue and see him for the first time in his full gold top, black slacks, and shoes. He winks at you from across the room as you untie the knots of your purple, red, and yellow pom poms, gesturing to his outfit after and mouthing, “Like it?”

You wordlessly flash him a thumbs up in approval before showing him his shirt you’re wearing over your costume as he made you promise over breakfast, making him giggle over the hand fan he holds up to his face before focusing back on his conversation with Chan who’s filming an interview with him and the other captains of the participating teams as a courtside reporter.

Seungmin, preparing for his own pre-competition interview on the side, then takes the latter as his cue to sit next to you on the benches. “Minho scares me.”

“Minho always scares you.” You chuckle, elbowing his side and sparing him a quick glance before going back to your work. “What did you do this time, Minnie? Hit him with your cue cards?”  

But your team’s persistent courtside reporter only shakes his head from the corner of your eye, glancing up ahead of you once again before repeating, “No, seriously, he was glaring at Eunwoo a while ago when you were talking to him and now he’s all smiley and winking at you now that you’re alone. It kind of scares me and I’m not the one being looked at.”

You whip your head over to the same direction, easily spotting Minho again whose eyes immediately soften up at your gaze gaze before smirking and winking again at you. Turning back to Seungmin after, you shrug and say, “He looks fine to me. He‘s always greasy in public by default.”

The younger boy only sighs in defeat, rubbing his temples as he replies, “I don’t know what’s going on in your home life but I’m saying this as a concerned friend and bystander: get a room.” 

“What?!” 

“Do everyone a favor, it’s getting annoying.” He points out, quickly glancing behind you once again before shuddering at Minho’s glare that’s now directed to the other boy he just mentioned. “And we all seriously feel bad for Eunwoo; guy was just asking you for eyeliner.”

“We’re not dating, Minnie, oh my God!” You smack his arm in disbelief, taking a quick scan around the room after to make sure that no one heard your blabbermouth of a friend. Lowering your voice, you then add, “But did he really? Glare at Eunwoo, I mean?”

“Plotted five different murder scenarios and everything.” Seungmin affirms. “Felix and Chan were texting me from across the room while it was all happening and they both said they could see smoke come out of Minho’s ears. Even Yeji was scared and she was just passing by to see Chaeryeong.”

“You guys are delusional.”

“We are tired of this dumb sexual tension.” He defends, gesturing to himself then to Chan and Hyunjin from afar then to Minho and, finally, to your shirt with Minho’s university logo on the print. “Anyway, I also heard from some of the other reporters that he made Jisung and Hyunjin hold something for him today when their team came in. What if it’s for you?”

You raise an eyebrow, shaking your head. “No? He didn’t bring anything weird to the bus stop this morning and I’m pretty sure he went straight to his uni after dropping me off at my stop.” You point out before exhaling another sigh and patting the younger boy’s shoulder. “You know what I think? I think looking after your significant other is taking a toll on you. Are you sure you don’t need anything? A break from courtside reporting maybe?”

Seungmin groans. “Ah, whatever. You two figure this out before someone actually gets an idea to shove you two into an actual room—especially Jisung and Hyunjin!” He concludes before noticing the sudden commotion to your left, eyes widening at realizing that the reporters are being called for their opening spiels now. “Oops, I gotta go, crowd check!”

“You better, you’re starting to talk weird!” You smack his elbow playfully, standing up when he does and bidding him goodbye. “Hype up our crowd and break a leg out there!”

“And you do well on the floor later!” He smiles back, waving goodbye at you before joining Chan and the other reporters to the exit leading to the main floor. “Don’t forget to drink water!”

“Will do, capt.!” And with that, Seungmin runs off to open the program, the empty space next to you quickly getting occupied by Minho after who points at your shirt cheekily.

“You look cute in my shirt.” He comments, adjusting the hat he wears similar to Michael Jackson’s. Fortunately, the lighting backstage is not as bright as the floor’s that his top only glimmers slightly in front of you as he moves.

“You just saw me wear this last Sunday.” You deadpan against another wave of heat rising up to your cheeks, your hands fiddling unconsciously with the hem of your shirt. “It was getting cold just wearing my costume.”

“What did Jeongin and Seungmin say?” He asks, gesturing his head over to the exit where Seungmin just passed through a while back.

“Jeongin just laughed and Seungmin said—ah, nevermind.” You shake your head towards the end, piquing Minho’s interest even further anyway.

“What? What?”

“Nothing! It was nothing.” You bluff with another shake of your head, pushing Minho away with your pom poms when he teases you by leaning his face closer to yours. “Anyway, when will you perform?”

“We’re coming out third for the team and I think our exhibition members are performing fourth. You?”

“First, actually—for the team, I mean.” You frown. “Then we’re last for exhibition.”

“We can watch each other then! I’ll cheer for you from the front seats, the boys have front row seats out there near your uni’s bleachers.”

“Don’t you need to stay back here and, I don’t know, do captain stuff?” You ask next.

“And miss out on your performance? No way! The kids can take care of themselves for 6 minutes.” He shrugs with a dismissive hand. “Why? Don’t you want me to cheer you on? I brought your shirt with me.”

“So you took my shirt!”

“You couldn’t possibly think the neighbors would.” He rolls his eyes playfully, slinging an arm over your shoulder and directing the two of you to the exit along with the others for the opening rites. “So will you come out and watch me too?”

“It’s not like I have another choice. I’m already wearing your shirt to a compet.” You reiterate, making him smile. “As long as you don’t take unflattering photos of me again.”

“Nope, I’ve learned my lesson already.” He grins mischievously, making you smack his arm. “I already have Hyunjin on that job—maybe Changbin too, he brought a tripod and everything to film today.”

“I’m kicking you out of the house when we get home.”

“Ooh, I’m so scared!”

“Shut up.”

Minho cheers you on during your performance, anyway, holding red and green balloons and your shirt, as if a banner, next to Changbin, Jisung, and Hyunjin who all hold different colors of balloons and even more diverse slogans flashing on their phones as well. “Go Y/N!” He yells whenever you have to perform a stunt or dance at the center, jumping up and down his seat and receiving confused looks from the people in their bleachers who aren’t familiar with the two of you.

“Minho’s cheering for you again.” Jeongin snickers quickly as he catches you from a lift, making you discreetly pinch his arm under you.

“Don’t even—“ You sigh, hopping off of your teammates and proceeding to the next formation.

Still, Jeongin bothers you anyway as you perform a series of jumps before kneeling down on the mats. “I just wanted to say it’s cute but pretend that didn’t come from me.” He mumbles against the loud music next to you. “Will you come out and cheer him on too?”

“You already know I will.” You sigh, clasping your hands together once it’s time to stand up again. “Will you come too?”

“I’m sitting with Chan and Seungmin!” He says before parting ways with you. “Sit with us!”

And you do, wearing Minho’s shirt again over your costume once it’s his team’s turn to perform while you hold a black and gold balloon that Chan teaches you quickly how to wave around in the way their university does in every performance. “Go Minho!” You all cheer at the same time from the courtside reporters’ area, making the said pep squad captain turn to your direction as he waits for his cue from behind a prop coffin akin to Michael Jackson’s Thriller.

Minho waves at you shyly in response, prompting the other boys to tease you for the duration of the his solo.

“Get a room!”

“Seungmin!”

-

The cheer dance program lasts for almost 2 hours with the team routine, the exhibition from select members where you participated (and received too much yells from your friends on different sides of the arena), and the awarding where you end up placing 1st runner-up on the team and 1st place on the exhibition while Minho snatches the Champion title for his team among all of the awards they were giving out.

By 8 PM when the program officially ends, your body is already sore from performing twice but you come out to the mats once again, anyway, to take photos with your friends.

“Okay, everyone, say cheese!” Naeun exclaims, pressing the timer on her camera before joining your group, easily climbing up your friend group’s improvised pyramid.

“Cheese!” The camera snaps photos of you and all of your friends from different universities involved in the cheer dance in quick succession, Minho teasing you from below halfway and pretending to drop your foot in his hands.

“There! I think we got it.” Seungmin points out once the camera’s snapping noise stops, standing up from kneeling in front with Chan, Yeeun, and Chaeryeong to check. “Alright, it’s good! Season 103 is done! Finally!”

Your group erupts in cheers as you and the other fliers are carefully caught back and helped back down on the mats while the courtside reporters do a group hug and snap more photos, this time on Yeeun’s phone where they started doing poses resembling their university mascots. You fall smoothly on Minho and Jeongin’s arms, hopping off easily and thanking Jeongin.

“What about me? Hm?” Minho pouts once Jeongin’s dragged away by Felix and Chenle to take more photos, carding his fingers through your bright red hair. “You could at least say thank you.”

You look up at him and snicker, elbowing his side. “Thank you, Minhooo. Happy?”

“Better.” He smirks before twisting his upper body halfway to turn behind you. When you follow his action with your gaze, your then see Changbin and Hyunjin jogging over to you with your trophies and a large bouquet of sunflowers and roses. “I got you something by the way—well, Changbin and Hyunjin bought then I paid them or else they’ll get tissues in their mouths again.”

“Wha—?” You eye the flowers as they approach in pure shock, your eyes widening even more when Changbin and Hyunjin only send you knowing smiles and winks before running away, cheering Minho on as they escape to your other friends. “W-What? W-Why this all of a sudden?”

Minho chuckles at your reaction, passing you your trophy from the exhibition category while he holds his from the team category with the bouquet in one hand. “I just thought that...it’s the end of the season—our last season so what if I—what if I finally asked you out properly?” He explains, growing more sheepish as he explains further while he then transfers the bouquet in his free hand and thrusts the fragile gift towards you. “Felix and Jeongin suggested that I make it more grander with an after-compet performance or something but I know that’s not your type so I got you flowers instead since I know you’ll win something either way.”

“O-Oh.” You muse in your speechlessness, catching a glance of your mutual friends now crowding together from a distance and holding up their phones to record Minho’s confession. Around you, even a few passersby have also momentarily stopped to look, equally as surprised knowing your infamous relationship with your somewhat rival in these competitions. “Y-You’re—you’re asking me out.”

“That’s the plan.” He shrugs with another laugh, grinning even wider when you slowly take the flowers in your own hands to smell the flowers. “If not, then we can totally just pretend I bought you the flowers as congratulations for winning the exhibition catego—hey, woah!”

You shake your head with a smile, having already gathered your thoughts, and pull him into a hug with your free hand, effectively cutting him off and making everyone around you cheer. “Of course, I’d go out with you, dumbass.” You answer his unspoken question, making him smile over your shoulder and hug you back tightly. “Anyway, I’m too lazy to kick you out of the apartment.”

“Ya!”

“I’m just kidding!” You then pull away slightly after, tiptoeing up to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Thank you for the flowers—and also maybe for assuming that I’m going to win something.”

“You always win something, anyway—even if it’s not always the team category because you can never beat me to that in this competition.” He teases, earning him another smack on the arm. “You did win my heart.”

“Ugh, Minho, gross!” You scrunch up your nose, feigning disgust and making him laugh as he dips down to kiss you. “Please never say that in front of my face ever again, we still have Nationals at the end of the semester!”

[tundrainafrica]

Title: Lovebug (3/10)

Summary:  

“It might be a bug.”

“A bug?”

“Sometimes the developers of this application make mistakes. This is our first time meeting I’m sure so…Isn’t it a bit weird that we just met for the first time and it rings like this? And for two strangers to coincidentally ring each other’s alarms?“

Levi is the developer of the Love Alarm App and Hange is married to Zeke.

Link to cross-postings: AO3

Other Chapters: 1 2 4 5

Notes: So I was really planning on my posting the next chapter tonight and wahhhh right on time @renrampant posted this beautiful piece of art inspired by lovebug. I hope this chapter satisfies <3. I hope the zekehan kiss which will be coming in a chapter or two does justice to the art too.

Levi was a man of his word and he always had been. The night he created his tinder profile, such a penchant had turned out to be more than just an inconvenient truth.

Something so ideally simple as to create a tinder profile, shouldn’t have taken him more than a few hours. Yet, Levi found himself searching, grappling for the right words to say, finding some way to make himself more attractive than he actually was. It turned out with his own meagre attributes, drawing the right person was an altogether daunting task.

Maybe he was overthinking that night. Overthinking had been enough though to leave him exhausted, retiring for the night even before he even noticed he had forgotten to place the phone by his bedside.

When he came into his senses again, sunlight was streaming through the room, turning even the dimmest corners a little less black and a little more gray. The phone was a warm heavy weight vibrating on his chest.

He had to leave for the office soon.

His sleeping schedule only provided him a generous hour and a half to shower and to commute. Frustration at not being able to complete his bio the night before had him sluggish. It had him unwillingly reaching towards the back of his mind as he showered, as he shaved and pulled his light sweater on.

He considered extirpating that nagging thought. All you have to do is put a bio right? Levi thought to himself as he made his way to the subway station. He memorized the way to work like the back of his hand, all the way until the train platform He took the risk of walking straight ahead, eyes completely glued to the screen in front of him.

How it had taken him so much focus to decide on a bio. How it had taken him so much energy and thought. He didn’t know.

Levi though was a man of his word and thus, he had ended up clicking save after typing only a few simple straightforward words.

'Currently software testing. If interested, please swipe right.’

***

“So Levi, you’re a software tester?”

Levi found himself stifling a surprise snort at that question. The sound had come out as something he managed to disguise as a clearing of his throat. Hopefully it worked.

They had just settled on one of the corner seats of a chain coffee shop, a conservative choice for a first date. That is, if he were planning on impressing her. The date felt more like an obligation than an actual passion project. And obligations always had Levi’s mind running on overdrive, even with things as simple as ice breakers.

He didn’t expect that to have been the first line of conversation. He didn’t even know how to pronounce her name yet. The woman was looking expectantly though, bending a little forward. Whether she had been feigning interest or whether she had been genuinely interested, Levi couldn’t really tell.

Technically he tested software for a living and he didn’t need to really expose himself as the head engineer of the software so he settled for a nod.

“Oh, what kind of software do you test?” The woman in front of him pressed.

Levi snuck a glance at his phone under the table. Lynn. But was it pronounced ‘lint?’ Or was it pronounced ‘line?’

He was overthinking again. But when the woman had pronounced his own name correctly, it seemed almost criminal to have to mispronounce her name. Maybe he could table that question for a while.

Or never go on a date with her again. Levi thought to himself as he looked back up at her with the most casual face he could muster. “I test biology related software,” he answered. He purposely kept it vague. He had to note she was also a love alarm user. She had mentioned that part in her bio. Bringing it up in a conversation though was another issue altogether. If he brought it up, she might ask. If the conversation continued, she might ask more.

Did he want to expose then that he was the one who had designed the actual application?

“Biology sounds very interesting,” she commented. She didn’t seem interested in Biology though.

Not as interested as Hange. That quick comparison came like an uninvited visitor and Levi found himself just slapping the phone on top of the table on impulse. The clack of the phone on the table, the metal on hardwood rattled him enough to drive those thoughts away.

Lynn jumped in surprise. “Are you okay?” she asked.

Levi felt the blood rush to his face. When he was thinking longingly about someone married, and comparing her to Lynn, his date for the day, blushing seemed like an almost welcome sensation. “I heard you use the love alarm,” Levi started. When he was already making a fool of himself, might as well go straight to the point.

“You would like to check if we’re attracted to each other huh?” She asked. “But I don’t think we’d find out by the first date…”

“I said on my profile, I wanted to test a software so that’s why I’m here now actually.” Those words forced themselves out of Levi and they came out as a disturbed flow, as guttural sounds that burned in his throat. In the end, the honest man inside him prevailed.

“Test?” Lynn had been nice enough at least to mirror him and put her phone on the table. “You wanna test the love alarm now?”

Levi nodded as he fixed his eyes on the screen in front of him. He was familiar enough with the banner in the front of the screen to know with just a quick glance. The love alarm was active.

He didn’t have to open the application or pull down the banner to know the result. He was all too familiar with how the application would work even when placed on silent mode. The banner should at least appear, with the words ‘Someone nearby is in love with you.’

If there were at least two people around them then, if somebody else rang it, Levi would have been compelled to check. Both applications were void of hearts though. Levi closed the application and pocketed his phone. “It looks like we aren’t attracted to each other.” He only realized as those words escaped from his lips, how awkward or maybe how rude of a comment it came out as.

Lynn’s eyes were wide for a second before she furrowed her brows, framing those brown eyes. “Of course, we just met. I think attraction is something that can be built over time right?” Lynn answered.

“You’re not wrong,” Levi said. Really, he didn’t even believe he could be someone who could rattle off facts about love. Hange had said it herself, he was a little inexperienced.

He wanted to be right about it though. He wanted to believe attraction could be built over time. By extension, he wanted to hold on to the possibility that attraction could also dissipate into apathy. After all, all those emotions should have been in the same ballpark.

“So what do you think?” Lynn asked. She had said some words before that but maybe Levi had reflected too deeply to have processed anything more than the face of the woman before him.

If he blinked and squinted a little afterward, he could pretend that same wavy brown hair was Hange’s. Hange’s hair though was a little shorter and a little messier and when bright light shone at it from certain angles, it came off as a little red. Hange’s eyes were a little bigger and her face was a little rounder.

Lynn was just too different from Hange to ever be Hange.

When Levi let his vision blur though, let it focus on her features slowly then all at once, he could play pretend. When looking from his peripherals, settling for blurs instead of clear pictures, he could pretend the brown hair was Hange’s, the waves that fell on her shoulders as just another layer.

He didn’t even notice it, even after they had split the bill and when she turned down his half hearted offer to take her home. That was until her last greeting came out as they parted ways along the main street that led up to the train station.

Her last greeting was a long way off from a conventional goodbye but it had done its job to get Levi’s attention.

“By the way Levi, my name isn’t Hange.” She unmatched him on tinder after that.

***

Levi decided to put a small note under his name.

Software Engineer. Currently testing software. If interested please swipe right.

It turned out though, there were people who never read bios. “So, what do you do for a living?” The woman in front of him asked. His case in point.

Hange likes reading. An invasive thought tore through him then and Levi wondered how that could have ever been related to the situation at hand.

When he questioned himself, he found out why he even reflected on it in the first place. Right, since Hange likes reading, she wouldn’t have overlooked my bio if she found me on tinder.

Of course, she wouldn’t have tinder. Levi took a deep breath then, reminding himself for the nth time that he was going to have to settle for people who weren’t married to billionaire business tycoons.

He was going to have to settle for people who weren’t Hange.

But he didn’t have to settle for her either. She was underwhelmed yet underwhelming at the same time and Levi was starting to miss Lynn already as the more desirable option.

He quickly shook his head. You don’t have to see any of these people again. All you have to do is turn the love alarm on and watch it ring. But he was feeling so underwhelmed, so disappointed with the turn out of the date in front of him just minutes into meeting her. He had entertained just the thought of cancelling their food there, the only thing stopping him being the wasted food and the poor waitress who would have to clean the mess. So he decided he could at least stay long enough to at least try.

“So, have you heard of the love alarm Nanaba?” Levi asked. He may have put just a little more emphasis in her name. After all, he didn’t want the Lynn-Hange incident happening again.

“Of course, who hasn’t learned about the love alarm app? Actually I have it with me right now.” Nanaba pulled out her phone and dropped it in front of him.

Ten years of hard and stressful work made Levi immune to even the slightest compliments. “You wanna do some testing?” He asked. “Don’t you want to see if we’re compatible?”

Compatible. That was a complex word and Levi started to doubt the applicability of that application in determining compatibility. It was a love alarm, not a compatibility alarm.

Nanaba grinned. “Sure but I have to tell you, I don’t think it actually works.”

Levi raised his eyebrows in mock surprise. He hoped it seemed genuine though. “Really?” When he momentarily thought back to the numerous support tickets logged just within the past two weeks thought, his expression may have turned just a little genuine. It was a mess of an application after all.

“I’ve been using it for a few months already... And it hasn’t rung, not even once. .”

Maybe nobody likes you. Levi had some ironclad rules about testing, always start with user errors, not with application errors and that had him instinctively blaming her but he had to note, most people had one to two matches, Nanaba didn’t look particularly unlikeable either. Just with the thought of statistics, it should have at least rung once if she kept it on regularly.

Levi quickly switched from his engineering hat to his much more empathetic yet still very shitty customer service persona. “Maybe you just haven’t found the one who could ring it for you?” The words tasted so sweet they almost instantly clabbered into sour milk in his mouth. He felt like he was in some sappy Korean drama.

“Well, it rang with my friend Mike once but we don’t see each other that way…”

“Oh, really? Then why did you say it’s broken?”

“Because it rang with my best friend and that doesn’t count...” Nanaba wanted to say more. It was all over her face and her tone.

Levi was in no mood though to play love counselor. But he wasn’t an asshole enough to cancel the food and ditch a seemingly sad woman either. The food came at the right time when Levi was entertaining the prospect of just leaving.

Nanaba looked very much in the mood to speak, speak about something a little more emotional, a little more serious than hobbies and Levi found himself hesitant to force the conversation elsewhere.

Levi came out of that date with no second date, no results. Nanaba on the other hand came out of that date with new found confidence to confess her feelings to her long time best friend.

By the time they had exited the shop, Levi was already swiping again, grumbling obscenities about how testing wasn’t supposed to be that hard.

***

“Rico Brzenska,” Levi said. There were only too many ways to mispronounce ‘Rico.’ Still, two failed dates had him careful about names already. “So what do you do for a living?” And careful about other things as well.

“I’m a student.”

Levi almost spit his tea out at that. He should have been more careful. He had read her bio, she had mentioned something about a love alarm app and that had him swiping right already. He was sure if he had seen any indication of a minor, he would have swiped left. “Really? What kind of student?” He asked, having gone subtly for his phone and pushing it further under the table.

“A graduate student taking business and commerce.”

Levi only had to take a quick glance at his settings to be sure, there were no chances of him dating a minor, as long as nobody was lying about their age on tinder. Being an honest man though, Levi had a harder time looking through white lies.

Such awareness had him studying her round face, her large blue eyes for a little longer. She could have been a minor. Or he could just be paranoid.

But when dating a minor could actually mean jail time, Levi didn’t want to take any chances. “Do you have any ID on you?”

“ID?” Rico frowned. “Why would you need an ID?”

“You said in your bio you wanted to test the love alarm right?”

Rico nodded. “Yes, I just wanna make sure before I start dating someone, we already have the initial attraction. I don’t wanna waste my time with people who aren’t attracted to me or I’m not attracted to, if you get what I mean?”

In response, Levi hummed in understanding. He did get what she meant. The last thing he wanted to do though was inadvertently ring the love alarm of someone a good many years younger than him and risk jail time. He probably wouldn’t ring it anyway.

But just in case. Levi put his phone out on the table, leaving one hand outstretched as if to wait for an ID.

No ID. No Love Alarm. He was sure that was the sign he was giving.

"Wait you don't think I'm off age do you? You think I'm lying on my profile?"

"No, I don't think you are," Levi said. Maybe his expression betrayed his words.

Rico eventually let go of an ID, a school ID from a familiar university logo Levi was sure he had seen a few times. And her face then had been one of pure irritation and maybe a hint of fury.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "There? Legal enough for you?"

Still a student, still too young to be engaging in anything with an older man, at least by Levi's standards. Still, he found himself almost obligated to just test the alarm in front of her.

Rico didn't look happy at all to be heavily scrutinized, or doubted. When she activated her application, Levi saw it as a cue to activate his own.

All you have to do is press the button. Levi told himself. He knew it wouldn't ring. He felt no attraction to her but paranoia had his brain going in all sorts of directions at once. Maybe the blood that rushed through his cheeks then was love. Maybe his hands shaking then were nervousness and excitement at meeting one's destined partner.

Also Rico wore glasses. For some reason, that had him thinking back to someone else with glasses, he wondered for a second if her eyes were much larger without those on. And he wondered if it was similar for Hange.

How such a long train of thought could have occupied him in such a short frame of time, interrupted by a quick sleight of hand, Levi didn't know.

But it had ended so abruptly, almost violently with the familiar cacophony of two love alarms ringing at once.

For a second, Levi sat frozen on the table as his mind went ahead, racing over theories and potential testing methods to deduce the root behind the outcome.

Do I have a glasses kink? That had been Levi's first thought. He looked down at his own phone to see the one heart and the bright message on top.

One person nearby is in love with you.

His second thought had been a little more objective. It's a bug. He told himself. I'll just have to do further testing.

Rico’s eyes were wide in shock. For a few seconds or so, she struggled to move and he couldn’t blame her. After all, the ringing of multiple love alarms in such a silent place like a cafe on a weekday morning was a scene that definitely had the potential to catch some people’s attention.

Levi couldn’t be too sure. He didn’t want to survey his surroundings either so he narrowed his view to just his own love alarm and back at Rico. The latter went for her phone.

From his own angle, Levi couldn’t see her interface but he was familiar with the way she had swiped it, to know she had turned it off. The two love alarms continued to ring in the silence. Even with the tension and awkwardness so thick that made it difficult to slog through, his brain was still moving.

He was blessed with at least enough deduction skills to quickly figure it out for himself.

He was in love with someone else in the room. But who? He surveyed his surroundings, keeping his view closed to only one person at a time. That gave him enough time to brush away the rest of the stares that surfaced from having made such a scene with the harsh ring of the love alarm.

Only after scanning for a second longer did his spatial awareness catch up to him. The other ringing was coming from behind. Levi turned behind him, quickly enough to catch the mop of chestnut brown hair. Fortunately, he had been slow and careful enough to pull away at the last second, missing her forehead by a hair’s breadth.

“Watch where you’re fucking going!” That had been Levi’s first instinct. After all, he was still seeing red, just imagining their heads slamming into each other in the middle of a very silent cafe.

The brunette in front of him, put one finger to her masked mouth, pointing at one of the old fashioned signs just above her seat.

In silence, there is eloquence. It read.

Hange was a very eloquent person. Levi had read enough messages from her and stalked enough of her works to know that much. Any other day, maybe any other minute, he would have been happy to listen, learn a thing or two from the master of diplomacy.

But Hange had virtually come out of nowhere. In the middle of a date.

Giving her a onceover though, noting her masked face. The only two things that made her recognizable then was her mop of brown hair tied in a ponytail and her masked mouth. Still, that had been more than enough for Levi to have seen through it.

She had settled on the seat behind him. The way she looked back at him and the way she had seemed a little too relaxed with a half finished cup of coffee just in front of her, Levi was sure she had been there for a while.

How much did she hear? Levi couldn’t ask just yet. The alarms were still ringing and as soon as Levi turned it off on his end, it stopped. Yet people continued to stare. More importantly, Rico was still staring from behind him.

“Do you two know each other?” She asked.

The answer didn’t come as quickly for Levi as he would have wanted it too. They knew each other, they’ve met at least twice. They’ve eaten out together once. But technically, did it count as ‘knew?’ Did Hange feel the same way?”

“We’re colleagues, working on the same project,” Hange answered for him.

Levi almost instantly realized he liked that answer. Colleagues. It was definitely more intimate than ‘knew each other.’ While at the same time, it held more respect in one’s skills and talent than the word ‘friends.’ And it implied in its own little way that Hange cared about the project just as much as he did.

It had been difficult to muster a straight face then. Still, he pushed forward, nodding when he struggled to stifle the motions of his mouth and the blood that rushed to his face then.

“But the… the love alarm… it…” Rico continued to speak. She shifted her eyes quickly between both Levi and Hange. “And you…” Her eyes fixed on Hange then.

Levi followed her eyes instinctively. Did Rico recognize Hange? He couldn’t confirm it for himself. Soon after that, Rico didn’t say anything in response. Instead she blinked back surprise. She started to clean out her things and place them into her bag.

“Wait, you’re leaving?” Levi wanted to pull her back. For a split second, he had reached out his hand, grasping his hand before pulling quickly back. He didn’t mind losing the chance at a second date. Just the thought of putting someone in such a tight and uncomfortable position had his stomach turning. He couldn’t for the life of him tell what she was thinking but he at least felt the tension.

Rico didn't have the most eloquent response either. “Sorry about this… I guess on my end it just feels wrong meddling in somebody else’s relationship… I don’t wanna be the one who’d stop people from getting together.”

Levi was quick to understand though. His thoughts flew back to Nanaba just a date ago and the long one sided counseling session which consisted of Nanaba’s long drawn monologues and Levi’s own grunts of understanding. The date which eventually ended with Nanaba finally figuring out for herself the best course of action.

You know, you’re right, Both of our love alarms rang. And that’s the whole point of this app right? If they both ring, it’s a sign, we should act on it.

And that was the whole point of the love alarm. How many times had he reviewed marketing material, love story commercials which ended with that same message?

Levi opened his mouth ready to speak up. By then, Rico was already out the door, any evidence of her presence just a second ago disappearing within seconds of her leaving. The chimes by the store entrance gradually slowed to a weak dance, the people who watched her leave eventually fell back to whatever they were doing beforehand, and Levi’s own protests had deadened into a light whisper.

It’s a bug. Besides, she’s married. The words had settled in his tongue like a familiar friend and he was sure if given the chance, he would have managed to say it loud and clear.

Levi looked back in his phone to see Rico had unmatched him, just a little too quickly.

“I think we should get that bug fixed soon,” Hange whispered. She sounded like she was stifling a laugh.

"For someone who's worried about the bug, you looked like you had a swell time ringing our alarms just a while ago," Levi said bitterly.

"Zeke's on a business trip and I'm bored and lonely."

“Well, don't take it out on me.” Levi took out his wallet and dropped the cash by the side of his drink, counting enough to pay for Rico’s drink too. He didn’t think too much about the receipt or the change.

The murmurs around him were more than enough to have him hurrying out of the cafe. Did they recognize Hange?

He thought it an appropriate time to satisfy his curiosity when they were both a good distance from the shop. “Do you think people recognize you as Zeke Jaeger’s partner?”

Hange put one finger to her mask. “I saw you outside the shop and when I thought of ringing your love alarm, I did what I could to prepare." Her eyes were still smiling though and Levi was sure there was a laugh behind that mask. "Besides, even though most people recognize Zeke, I don't think they'd notice me. I don’t join the interviews or events as much as he does,” Hange said.

Levi noticed though that Hange was the type to just get lost in her surroundings. Ort hat was at least what Levi had picked up on her the first few times they have gone together. She quickly relaxed after that short and quick question and answer, and in the way that she navigated through the crowds a little too clumsily yet a little too playfully, Levi found evidence backing up his mini theory.

Even if anybody did recognize her, she probably wouldn’t have noticed. And that little realization had made it much harder for Levi to stomach what just happened in the cafe. They needed to get the bug fixed fast. “Let’s go back to the office, maybe do some more testing.”

“Isn’t that why we’re here now?” Hange asked, pointing towards the general direction of their building. “I visited your office this morning because I didn't have much to doand I thought I could be helpful. You weren’t there so I asked around and one of the people from the support team told me you were out. She said probably in your favorite tea shop.”

“You met Petra?” Levi asked. “Redhead? Short?” He soon added, noting her confused expression.

Hange snapped her fingers. “Yes, that’s her name.”

“Yeah, she knows my favorite tea shop. Gets me my favorite mix of tea leaves every year for Christmas,” Levi said, more to fill the air with at least some conversation on the way back.

It took Levi a while to notice Hange had peeked at his face even as he averted his gaze, looking elsewhere.

She spoke up. “Say… Have you ever tried testing your love alarm on her?”

***

Petra was one of the newer employees, a little shy but particularly mature for her age. She was notably competent and had a particularly better handle of her emotions than most of the other colleagues. Her most important asset had been her level headedness even under the pressure of scrutiny. Petra was the type of person to know when she was attracted to someone and she was the type of person to admit it for the sake of a smoother testing process.

Thus, she was one of Levi's favorite volunteers when testing the love alarm.

And Levi was sure, to some degree she could have liked him. If he were to consider her words as truth, and the hearts at the bottom of the screen as some indication.

When they were testing every release on fifty employees over a one week period, putting results side by side with checklists and biometrics tests, they were as thorough as it could be. It was always the case that when it was the two of them testing with each other, Levi’s love alarm always rang, Petra’s didn’t. Every single time, Petra would tag that instance as ‘QA passed.’

It could have been a placebo effect or it could have also been just an admittance to get the testing process done just a little faster but Petra never seemed like the type, breezing through the awkward scenes that came with testing a love application like they were part of a job. If it ever bothered her, she never showed it.  

Levi’s alarm never rang in any of the tests he had ever taken anyway. When he double checked though, lining up the results side by side with checklists of what to look out for when one was in love, he found that it never had been a big deal. He had never been attracted to anyone in particular anyway.

“So, I’m the only one your love alarm rang with huh?” Hange asked.

Except maybe Hange.“Yeah, when doing QA work, I’ve had to test with the other employees and it never rang with any of them,” Levi admitted.

“How does QA work?”

“We test with employees, users… All on a volunteer basis if I may clarify.” Levi added that last part for just a touch of professionalism. “We have acceptable ranges for biometrics, checklists and we have a certain number of results which need to fit there to consider a release viable.”

“Why don’t we test using the QA procedure?”

“Because the QA process is a logistical nightmare. We plan a venue. We plan a schedule and we have to get a certain number of people to show up.”

“No, I meant… What if we try it, just the two of us. We answer the checklists, we take each other's biometrics and see if that falls in the exact range for ‘love'?” Hange suggested and her excitable tone only made it seem like she was suggesting something almost revolutionary.

Levi sighed. “I’d rather we use QA testing as a last resort.”

Hange’s face fell. “Why?”

“Because.”

“Because?”

“Because…” Levi would have liked to leave it at that. As he looked at Hange who had leaned on the wall, crossing her arms and staring back at him expectantly, he remembered, it was a professional relationship. If the partner of their very important investor demanded answers, she would get answers so he settled for something seemingly acceptable yet very pathetic in the grand scheme of things. “We’re going to have to answer standardized psychology quizzes and take some physical tests.”

“And I’m sure you’d have a few samples lying around. Let’s see what information we can get,” Hange said.

There were other reasons Levi had been hesitant to suggest such an exam in the first place. It had been difficult to grasp for the exact reasons until they arrived in the conference room Levi had reserved.

The room was a vacuum that had the special power of just drowning out voices, footsteps from just outside the hallway. The tables were empty, the white board put away towards the side of the room. It was clean, empty, void of any presence or even trace of it. It made Levi just a little more painfully aware of his heartbeat, his moist palms and his wild uncoordinated breathing.

He might just fail the physical exam. More specifically, he might just fail if he took it then, at the exact moment.

Grasping for some win, or at the least some comfort in that situation, he had half the mind to run through the ‘Am I in love?’ checklist or at least what he remembered from it. If he were a little honest, there might have been some things he would have checked.

But it didn’t mean he would fail it right?

“What do you think?” Hange pressed. She had settled for one of the chairs in the room.

Levi had answers, but he couldn’t share it just yet. Inviting her to take that meant that he was entertaining the prospect that they might just be in love with her---a cursed prospect.

“Or do you have any other ideas?” Hange asked. She cocked her head to one side in thought.

“If you give me a little more time to come up with something…” Levi said.

“Petra told me you have a week or two before they release the next fix. You’ve done most of the coding work. You just need to fix this bug right?” Hange was very talkative. It turned out Petra had been just a little talkative too with the right prodding by Hange. “Why don’t you wanna just test it now?” Hange's face darkened then to something almost threatening.

And maybe Levi was a little intimidated. He quickly turned away, unable to control whatever expression would force itself out of him then.

“Levi?” Her voice was grating. The echoing in the room didn’t do much to help alleviate it. “Come on, please? I want this investment as much as you do.”

If the partner of their very important investor demanded answers, she would get answers.

But it didn’t have to be the correct answers. “Fine,” Levi said. “You know, maybe the way we test this application… the way we test for love might actually be flawed so maybe some feedback from a researcher like you could be useful.”

Hange grinned from ear to ear, the ominous face of a while ago just a memory Levi could probably forget. “So where do we start?”

***

Testing for the biological numbers was quick with the right tools.

Heart rate. Hormone levels. Stress Levels. Pain Sensitivity. They had all the right test kits on hand with a document detailing the acceptable range.

All reasonable levels, albeit a little too far from the midpoint that Levi held on to the possibility that maybe they could log it all in as some coincidence. The checklists were just a little more difficult and maybe Levi was just thinking a little too far off that he had started to have a mini identity crisis.

I think about my partner a few times a day.

Partner: Referring to the person one tests the application with. Levi was aware of that much having tested the application long before. Yet for some reason, he had to loudly remind himself of that, even within the confines of his mind.

He entertained hypotheses. If Hange were his partner, that would be polyamory and that could even start the scandal of the year, or even the decade. He didn’t want to be part of that.

So he ticked ‘never’ because technically Hange wasn’t his partner anyway.

I want to be with my partner everyday.

Hange was Zeke's partner. Just the idea of getting in between a married couple had Levi's stomach turning and it had been easy to tick never right next to it.

My partner trusts me.

It was too early to tell, or so that was what Levi told himself then.

The word ‘partner’ had been a convenient term. Zeke had been a convenient presence in his mind. And that had him ticking all the 'nevers' towards the edge of the page just a little more confidently.

Technically, Hange wasn’t his partner. Technically they just met, so words like trust, amicability, happiness, charisma, compatibility and charm, didn’t have to apply to them just yet. A few minutes later, he had checked enough ‘nevers’ to have armed himself with the confidence to look her in the eye.

Hange though wasn’t reciprocating, looking deep in thought with whatever question she had been answering. She bit her lip.

Hange eventually met his gaze. Instead of being just a little more satisfied, Levi was a little disappointed, more in himself than in anyone else. For that few seconds that Hange bit her lower lip in thought, her cheekbones had seemed fuller, her hazel eyes held an almost imperceptible yet still very enthralling glimmer, and regretfully, he didn’t take the time to relish it when it was right in front of him.

“How’s the test?” Levi asked.

“It’s fine,” Hange said.

Levi slid his own answers towards her. “We just have to calculate the number of ‘always,’ the number of 'sometimes,' the number of ‘nevers’ and just match it on the document over here.” He turned his laptop towards her.

“I can do it,” Hange said, pulling the laptop towards herself. The next few minutes passed in silence. Levi stared at the ceiling, trying to keep his heartbeat in time with the clack of the keyboard. Hange typed fast and chaotically but in a way, there was rhythm and order and that had helped him get into a position where he could just drop his shoulders and fall back on the chair behind him.

“You don’t think I trust you?” Hange asked.

“It’s too early to tell right?” Levi said. That answer had been scripted and it slipped out of his mouth easily.

Hange’s let out a light sound, a cross between with a hum and a chuckle. “Well, to tell you the truth, I put here that I didn’t trust you either.”

“Well that makes both of us, I guess,” Levi said.

Hange continued to type, filling the room with some predictable rhythm, a predictable rhythm his own wild heartbeat failed to provide. Eventually, it stopped, with one loud clack on the ‘enter’ button or at least, Levi guessed it was the enter button.

Soon after, Hange leaned back on the backrest of her own chair. “Biometrics all fall in the acceptable range. Test results all fall in the unacceptable range,” she said, her tone unreadable. Too professional but Levi surmised it could be her usual ‘research’ tone. He hadn’t known her long enough to be certain.

“Maybe we should get to know each other first and try to answer again?” Hange suggested. “We just met so I can’t fully trust you yet but I think, we could get along with the right…”

Environment? Amount of time? Mutual Processing? Levi couldn’t be too sure of the answer. She had said something else after the word ‘right’ or maybe she didn’t. Still, there was a problem that needed to be solved, there was an issue that needed to be addressed that extended beyond the need to resolve the feelings between two strangers.

Or two colleagues. Levi decided he liked the word colleagues better. “So what do you suggest Hange?” Levi asked.

“I wanna do further research with this application. We can tweak whatever processes you’re using now to QA, whatever processes you’re using to determine whether people are in love. Maybe we just have to fix that a bit.”

“This application took years to develop. It’s gonna be difficult to overturn a lot of the processes.”

“Without the right funding…” Hange said. She wagged her finger and gave Levi a knowing look.

Levi narrowed his eyes accusingly at Hange. “So how’s convincing Zeke been going?”

“That’s the caveat,” Hange said. “He’s not a very techy guy. He’s an investor and scientist more than anything and sometimes, even with the right proposition, he’ll stick to some really weird reasons why he wouldn’t invest in something. I don’t blame him though since millions of dollars are usually on the line with each investment.”

" So, I’m guessing you tried to convince him?”

Hange nodded. “I did. And it looks like he won’t budge unless you fix that ‘bug.’”

“The bug which caused his love alarm to not ring around you?” And the bug which is causing our love alarms to ring. Levi added silently to himself. “Can you explain to him that we need the money to continue improving the system?”

“I’ve been with him for years, Levi. I know how he is.”

“So what do you suggest we do?”

Hange hummed. “I don’t know how programming works but...Maybe you can program the application to make it work just the way that Zeke likes it... For the time being?”

***

No. Just no.

Those were the words written all over Petra’s expression. Levi only had to look at the other faces around him to be very much sure, everyone agreed with Petra

For posterity’s sake, he repeated those words. “I understand that the regression test is done but unless I am able to get to the bottom of this bug, we won’t be able to release the fixes,” Levi said. He kept his words soft, yet still loud enough to echo through the conference room. He said it slowly and clearly. Just in case it was a bit harder to hear through shock and surprise.

“Sir, a lot of the fixes in this release have been promised for months,” Petra argued. The professionalism in her voice was still admirably apparent.

“Erwin’s orders. I’m just repeating them now,” Levi said.

“Is there anything we can do to help?” Gunther asked. “Have you found the reason behind it? I’m guessing if you do… we might have to make some changes to the code and go through regression testing again.”

“If ever that happens, I’ll handle the testing on my end,” Levi said. “It wouldn't be too hard, it’s just a blip in the code.”

“So you’ve found the cause?” Eld asked.

“Yes.” If Levi didn’t open his mouth to speak then, he was sure no one would have for the next few minutes. There was something festering in the silence, some common sentiment that he sensed among them, among those doubtful faces tinged with irritation and confusion.

He had always told them before. Always assume a user error first. And there was an apparent user error which he was sure everyone was entertaining.

What if Hange just didn’t love Zeke? A prospect that was ambrosia to Levi’s lips but at the same time a piece of ambrosia that he was sure was laced with poison. He couldn’t chew it, he couldn’t swallow for fear of just letting go for a few seconds longer, letting a smile curl up his lips during the most inopportune times.

Levi turned to Oluo in particular who he guessed would have been the one most likely to bring it up. The latter remained begrudgingly silent. It looked like no one else wanted to bring it up either. After all, Zeke was a huge opportunity for company growth, a huge opportunity for investment.

Eld spoke up.“If there’s anything we can do, just please ask. It might be too difficult of an investigation to do for one person.”

Levi shook his head. “I think this is an investigation I’d rather do alone.” There were parts of the investigation he hadn’t admitted to the team yet. All they had gotten in the report from Erwin was that Zeke’s alarm didn’t ring with Hange there but the scandal of their alarms ringing together was something he didn’t want circulating around the building.

And more importantly, there was another plan he and Hange have been entertaining, an almost unscrupulous scheme and he didn’t want anyone else involved.

***

It felt like he had run a marathon and he had been doing that slow jog for at least three days already. Or maybe it felt like he was trudging through a dessert and had been trapped there for the past three days.

He couldn’t tell for sure but his throat was constantly dry, his heart was constantly beating fast and any notification from Hange was either a water break or an oasis.

Three days ago, Zeke came back from his business trip. Four days ago, Levi sent the apk file to Hange.

“It’s a test build,” Levi said as soon as she confirmed she received it. “A test build I hard coded just for Zeke’s use.”

“Meaning…”

“Just say it’s a test build. Say I’ve fixed the code.”

“Meaning…”

“I hardcoded his data and the expected result. If he opens the alarm around you, his phone will ring," Levi explained. "It’s just a quick fix for now.”

Just a quick fix. Levi told himself multiple times. He had changed the code drastically enough though that the love alarm wouldn’t work as an expected love alarm, having customized it just to fit Zeke’s desires. For just long enough to get the money and long enough to find the actual cause of the bug.

“And tell him we’re asking for feedback before we release it,” Levi had added then.

The last time he had met her was three days ago when he dropped her the file, explained its use and when she had promised to download the apk file to Zeke’s phone.

She sent intermittent updates over the four day period. He liked it. He was enjoying it. He had confidence in the application.

Levi had to ruefully note though that the conversation never strayed too much from work. As expected from colleagues, as expected from business partners working towards the same goal.

Maybe a few times he had asked some vague questions just to get a hint of her daily life.

How’s Zeke? How are you guys?

Still, the answers always went back to updates on the application. When he was trudging to the desert or while running through some dirt track in his mind, even when the water tasted too artificially like plastic---too professional for his taste---he settled for it.

That was the only water he had after all.

Hange limited herself to ten messages a day, mentioning something about being bad at replying, apologizing for late replies. Levi had to admit though when he was working, he was guilty of a similar thing. Yet he found himself just a little irritable, a little desolate at such an outcome.

A week after he had last seen Hange, he decided to start reading the books about love again.

Love is a choice. Overused.

To love others, one must love themselves. He got that already.

Levi dropped his reader by the side of his bed and stared at the blank ceiling above him. The books on love were biased. They created for themselves an assumption, an assumption that she was his and whatever he had to deal with was some inner turmoil inside him, an inability to love. But what if he was willing to love? What if it was just a matter of circumstances just not letting him indulge in such an emotion.

He had entertained that for just a second before brushing away the nagging thought and the annoyingly sticky guilt that clung to it. Maybe there was merit in just turning off his emotions then, just discarding the overall idea of love. He deleted the books Hange had sent him from his ebook reader.

If the company got the funds, if Hange got the greenlight on her research, he would see her again, he would be forced to read those books and they would be forced to work together.

Then and there, he didn’t need to think about it just yet. He didn’t have to put himself through the pain of analyzing circumstances and emotions that left a heavy weight and an ache in his chest.

He could forget Hange until then. He could ignore her messages and maybe focus on something else like an action movie or a video game. He had streaming service subscriptions, he had game emulators on his laptop. Soon he discovered, with the right combination of focus, willpower just getting through slow starts, it was easy to immerse himself in something as mundane as a city building game.

He was halfway through building one of his farms and was already attached to the regular city goers of the small city he created for himself when his phone rang. That abrupt and grating sound had been enough of a reminder, Levi still wasn’t completely over being sad. He quickly reached for the phone on the side of his bench in an ungraceful and seemingly desperate chain of motions that had him almost ashamed of himself.

His laptop had been one of the victims, toppling over to the side of the bed but by god’s grace it had only skimmed the edges before laying flat on its side.

Levi muttered a soft curse. This message better be worth it. And the only message he decided would be worth it, would be a message from Hange which didn’t involve that stupid application.

Leviiiiiii are you free? :))))))))))

Free when? Levi was quick to reply. Now? Tomorrow? Next week? Really, he was always free, it was just a matter of asking for a leave and opening his schedule. He didn’t want to seem so pathetic as to tell her that though

Long weekend this weekend so Zeke offered to take us south to one of our country clubs.

Us?

Erwin is coming too. Levi didn't’ know whether to feel relieved or disappointed at that exposition. Before he could reply though, the messages kept coming.

Think of it as a thank you for the app ;)

And a start to a great partnership ;)

Hange had too many smileys, too many winky faces but recently, she had started to pepper her messages with just a little too much. They were colleagues, very friendly colleagues. For a second, he wondered how many smileys Hange used when messaging Zeke.

Still, Levi saw some glimmer of hope and optimism in the fact that they were creating a special bond in their own way.

And who would he be to turn down a special invite from a special colleague. I’ll see you there then :) He added his own smiley in the end, trying to forget the fact that he had wasted a good few seconds vacillating between the winking smiley face and the normal one.

Hange’s reply came quickly and maybe a little more enthusiastically. Okay! We’ll pick you up Friday night at the office :D

Levi was grateful at least he had something to look forward to.

[noona-clock]

Traveling Love (Collab) - Part 2

Genre: Fluffy/Romantic AU

Pairing: Nam Joo Hyuk x You (Female!Reader)

Warnings: None

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, Masterlist | Words: 2,230

A/N: Welcome to the third series in the monthly Love In Fours Ways collab with myself, @jackiejacks923​ @prettywordsyouleft​ & @this-song-thats-only-for-you​ . We have all taken inspiration from 4 illustrations (linked below), and during the last week of the month, we will each be sharing a 4-part mini-series based on those drawings.

Credit to: Puuung - Love Is In The Small Things

Part 2: Taking Photos of Each Other When Traveling to New Places

Joo Hyuk let out a soft groan as he flopped back onto the pristinely-made bed in the hotel room.

“Why is traveling so exhausting?” he murmured as he stared up at the ceiling before briefly closing his eyes.

Once you’d stepped out of your shoes, you gently crawled onto the bed and fit yourself right next to him. “I don’t know,” you sighed. You nestled into his side, resting your head on his shoulder as he put his arm around you and lazily rubbed your upper arm. “You’re just sitting the whole time, no matter if you’re driving on flying. ...Why is it so exhausting?”

After a little over a month of planning, the vacation you’d talked about sitting out on the balcony all those weeks ago had finally arrived. You’d spent more hours than you’d care to admit researching, mapping, booking, scheduling, and now here you were. You’d found the perfect little city next to a small sea with plenty to do and eat, but also plenty of ways to just relax.

Joo Hyuk let out a soft but contented sigh before pushing himself up onto his side and moving his arm out from under you to rest his head in his hand. “This is a nice place,” he stated as he looked around the room. “Good job. I’m very impressed.”

“Thank you,” you beamed, gazing up at him adoringly. “You told me to make this a treat, and I did.”

A tiny grin tugged at Joo Hyuk’s lips, and he lifted his other hand to reach out and tap you gently on the nose. “I knew I could trust you.”

“Of course you can! You know I love to plan things.”

“Exactly,” he nodded. “And you’re very thoughtful.”

“Well,” you murmured as your cheeks flushed a bit. “I try to be, at least.”

But you wouldn’t lie and say that you didn’t feel some sense of achievement at having planned this vacation -- and, so far, everything was going swimmingly, if you did say so yourself.

“What’s on the agenda for the rest of the day?” your boyfriend asked as he gazed down at you warmly. “It’s barely past lunchtime, we’ve got the whole afternoon and evening ahead of us.”

His question made you sit up, your eyes widening a little with excitement. “We have a reservation as this pizza place tonight -- all the reviews I saw said it’s the best pizza in the city. But before that, I figured we would just do some sightseeing, take some pictures, see if anything jumps out at us that we want to do in the next few days. Y’know -- classic tourist exploring.”

Joo Hyuk chuckled a little -- probably because of how weirdly excited you were to tell him the plans -- but he sat right up with you and nodded with determination.

“All right, then,” he said. “Let’s get to it.”

Even though the both of you had just been worn out from traveling all morning, you suddenly felt a burst of energy hit you. You sprang from the bed and headed to your suitcase to unpack.

After both you and Joo Hyuk had changed out of your traveling clothes and grabbed your cameras, the two of you headed out of the hotel and out into the streets of the city.

There was a slight chill in the air, making you relieved you’d put on your favorite green trench coat before leaving the room.

“Where to?” Joo Hyuk asked as he slipped his hand into yours.

You hummed thoughtfully, scrunching up your eyebrows and turning first to the left and then to the right. And since there really wasn’t anything to sway you one way or the other, you simply picked at random.

“This way,” you decided, lifting your free hand to point to the left of the hotel, down the relatively quiet street.

For the next few hours, you and Joo Hyuk roamed the city, barely even getting out your phones to look at maps or search something you wanted to learn more about. There was plenty of time for that during the rest of your trip; right now, you wanted to simply explore. The harmless threat of getting lost was actually kind of exciting because you knew a taxi was just a click away, so why worry? Normally, you did worry about it, but... not right now. Not today.

Today was just for fun.

Since both of you had brought your cameras with you, you spent a lot of time taking pictures -- mostly of the scenery and the awe-inspiring architecture around the city. You also snapped photos of any and all stray or wild animals you saw, so you most likely had about fifteen pictures of just squirrels in your camera roll so far.

Just as you realized the sun was incredibly low in the sky, nearing sunset, Joo Hyuk stopped walking.

“Here, let’s go on that bridge,” he murmured, nodding up toward a pedestrian bridge overlooking the streets below.

You quickly took out your phone to check the time, letting out a soft sigh of relief when you saw it still wasn’t quite time for your dinner reservation yet. In fact, there was absolutely enough time to visit the bridge, so you agreed and followed your boyfriend up there.

“Oh, wow,” you breathed when you stepped onto the wooden planks, your eyes scanning the view in front of and below you. “It’s beautiful.”

The lowering sun was casting the most beautiful golden light out over the city, the top of the sky starting to darken just a hint -- if you looked hard enough, you could see a few stars peeking through.

“And it’s golden hour,” Joo Hyuk added as he lifted his camera up.

“Is it?” you asked, lifting your brows as you turned your head to look at him. “I’ve always been curious what time golden hour was.”

“It’s just whenever the sun makes everything look...” Joo Hyuk smirked a little and gestured around the two of you. “Look like this.”

“Well, then,” you stated, lifting up your camera. “I should take advantage of it.”

No matter how vehemently Joo Hyuk protested it, he absolutely looked like a male model in every single picture he took, no matter if it was a selfie or a picture taken by someone else. He just had no bad angles, and even if the lighting was the opposite of golden hour, he somehow managed to look like he’d stepped straight out of a magazine.

So, were you going to pass up the opportunity to take a picture of your devastatingly handsome boyfriend in what was widely known as the best photography lighting?

No. Absolutely not.

But just after pressing the viewfinder to your eye and hovering your index finger over the button, Joo Hyuk also lifted up his camera.

“Wait, no,” you chuckled, though you still kept your own camera up in front of your face. “I wanted to take a picture of you.”

“But I want to take one of you, too!”

You laughed softly to yourself before going ahead and snapping the picture. You knew that, even with a camera blocking over half of his face, he would still look stunning.

Of course, you did make him put his camera down so you could take other pictures, and while he seemed a bit shy about it, he still posed against the railing of the bridge. But then he made you do the same for him -- and, to be truthful, that was basically the perfect description of your relationship.

Things had always been so equal between the two of you.

You never, ever felt like you gave more than you got, and you also never felt like you got more than you gave. Joo Hyuk wasn’t the most affectionate or emotionally expressive person, but that didn’t mean he ever made you feel unloved. He always showed you in other ways -- more subtle ways, mind you -- but for some reason, it had been incredibly easy for you to learn the language he used to express his feelings for you.

Even from the very beginning, things with Joo Hyuk had been so...

Easy.

You’d never worried about if he’d liked you or not, because you could just tell that he had. You’d never actually verbally established your labels as boyfriend and girlfriend because it had just happened. And you’d realized you were in love with him before you even knew you were starting to fall for him.

The two of you had only been together for a couple of years now, but it felt like forever.

Joo Hyuk had just taken a picture of you as you were looking out over the bridge and pushing your hair back with your fingers (a classic ‘this is a totally casual, candid, absolutely not posed picture’ pose), but instead of keeping his camera up and murmuring another suggestion for a pose, he gently set the camera down, letting it hang taut on its strap. He then slid the strap around his shoulder so the camera was behind him and walked the short distance over to you.

You figured he was coming over to tame a stray lock of hair which had been pushed out of place during the last picture, but instead, he simply stood behind you, circled his arms around you, and pulled you back to his chest.

“Hey,” you greeted with a soft chuckle.

He replied to you by placing a few kisses on your temple and ear, and even though they were very chaste, quick kisses, they still made your cheeks flush.

The two of you stood there for a few moments, Joo Hyuk moving his arms to grasp the railing in front of you while you continued to lean against his chest.

And then, in an incredibly quiet voice, your boyfriend murmured, “This is going to be... so cheesy, but --”

You held your breath, truly not able to anticipate what he might be about to say. You couldn’t remember a time over the last couple of years when Joo Hyuk had ever admitted to saying something cheesy.

“I...” he continued, his words so soft they were almost carried off by the small breeze in the air. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now. I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else, and I wouldn’t want to be doing anything else. Just -- taking pictures with you on this bridge... I don’t know, it’s just -- it’s perfect.”

Of course, his so-called cheesy words made your lips split into a wide, beaming grin, and while you desperately wanted to turn around and face him, you knew he was too shy for that right now.

So, you simply turned your head and placed a kiss on his cheek.

“I think so, too,” you whispered.

You felt Joo Hyuk’s cheek move as he smiled, and then he said, “Thank you for this. I don’t know if I’ve actually thanked you for planning everything, and if I haven’t, I’m sorry because you deserve --”

You couldn’t stop yourself. You turned around in his arms to face him, standing on your toes and capturing his lips in a brief kiss.

“I deserve,” you said after pulling away. “To be with you right here, right now. That’s all. And you’re the one who found this bridge, so I can’t take all the credit.”

The look on your boyfriend’s face made it clear that he was about to refute you, so you continued on before he got the chance.

“I did all the planning before we left, yes -- but all the planning in the world doesn’t guarantee a perfect vacation. Or even a nice one. Now that we’re actually here, that job belongs to both of us. So, if this turns out to be the wonderful, amazing trip that I think it will, it’s not all because of me.”

Joo Hyuk looked into your eyes, his gaze a combination of adoration and admiration. “You’re right,” he said with a small nod.

You were just about to reply to his statement with a very smug “As usual” but to your slight surprise, Joo Hyuk beat you to it.

“As usual,” he smirked.

“Y’know, I think we need to document this moment,” you grinned. “And not just because you said I’m right.”

Joo Hyuk playfully rolled his eyes, but he still shuffled around so his back was against the railing and the two of you were facing away from the view.

You held up your camera, though your boyfriend took it from you without a word -- the guy was tall and had much longer arms than you, better for taking selfies -- and pressed his cheek to your temple.

You smiled brightly, and when you heard the shutter go off, you murmured that he should take one more. And then you turned your head, placing your lips on his cheek as you brought one hand up to cradle his other cheek.

As soon as he took the picture, you knew that one would be going on the bookshelf in your living room at home. You absolutely wanted to remember this moment -- this whole evening, actually -- for the rest of your life, and that picture would be the perfect one to document it.

Part 3

[irishseeeker]

rules don’t apply - chapter four

Having a crush on your boss is embarrassing. Inappropriate. Wrong. Especially when your boss is Anthony Bridgerton, the most insufferable man on the planet whom you actively despise.

What does Kate have to say on the matter?

…No comment.

–

read chapter 1 here or here

read chapter 2 here or  here

read chapter 3: here or here

-----

chapter 4: guess who’s coming to brunch

-----

“Edwina!”

Edwina was completely soaked after falling straight into the pond. She was treading water, shrieking slightly as she gasped for air. The pond was deep enough that she couldn’t stand. Anthony reached her before Kate could.

“I’ll help her-”

“I’ve got her.” Anthony interrupted, extending his hand towards Edwina who gratefully let herself be pulled up.

Newton was happily paddling away in the pond, managing to keep himself above the water.

Kate nearly took out her phone to take a picture because he looked so cute but she didn’t think Edwina or Anthony would appreciate that.

“Newton, come here!” Kate kneeled down and gestured towards her corgi, who, of course, completely ignored her.

“I’m so sorry, Ed. I didn’t think he’d launch himself at you like that.” Kate wrapped her puffy black coat around Edwina’s shivering arms, running her hands up and down her to warm her up. Water was dripping down her face, her mascara now a black smudge around her eyes.

“Thank you, Anthony,” Edwina said, her voice shaking slightly as she shivered in Kate’s arms. She led her to the nearby bench, sitting her down. Anthony followed them but didn’t sit, lingering beside them.

“Are you alright?” Anthony asked, his face full of concern as he looked Edwina up and down. “You’re shivering. Here, take this.”

Edwina’s denim jacket was clinging to her skin and her hair was wet with a few leaves stuck in it. She pulled on Anthony’s hoodie, nodding thanks as she covered herself with Kate’s coat again. “What the bloody hell was that, Kate?”

“I’m sorry! I thought you’d move out of the way-he was running right at you!” Kate frowned as she could see Edwina’s teeth were chattering from the ice cold pond. “Why didn’t you move?”

Edwina tried her best to glare at her sister, but being one of the happiest people Kate knew, her glare more resembled a pout. “I thought Newton was just saying hello! I didn’t think he’d launch himself at me and attack me for a bagel in my hand.”

“He didn’t mean to! He recognized you and probably thought you were playing,” Kate said, biting her lip. “He’s just a dog.”

“He’s certainly something alright,” Anthony said, scoffing rather loudly as crossed his arms across his chest. He looked like a teacher from school just before they scolded you. His brows were furrowed, his mouth was in a flat line and he was looking at her intensely.

It would have been unsettling if it didn’t make Kate absolutely furious.

She just glared at him. “No one asked you.”

Kate didn’t wait for Anthony to reply, turning to Edwina who was looking between the two of them with a mixture of confusion and amusement. “I’ll go get Newton. I’ll be right back.”

Kate walked to the edge of the pond, getting rid of her hoodie and runners before dipping her foot into the baltic pond water to test the temperature. There was only one way Newton was leaving that pond. He wouldn’t come out willingly.

“You can’t be serious.” Of course he had followed her. She turned around to see Anthony staring at her incredulously, his upper lip curled up in disdain. It was a look she was familiar with, it was always plastered on his face during meetings in work. “You’re not going in after that thing.”

Kate rolled her eyes. “Of course I’m going in after him, he won’t come out otherwise!”

Anthony mumbled something under his breath that Kate didn’t hear, reaching down to take off his black runners. “I’ll get him.”

“No you will not,” Kate insisted, bending down to try and get Newton’s attention. He was still paddling away, completely ignoring them. “I’m going in.”

“No,” Anthony rebutted, taking off his t-shirt which made Kate audibly gasp and turn away from him. She had not been expecting that, especially so close. “I’m not letting you.

“First of all, you don’t let me do anything. Secondly, use your ego inflating chivalry somewhere else. It is not wanted here.” Kate shook her head. “Put your t-shirt back on for god’s sake.”

“I’ve trained for and swam a part of the English Channel before. Clothes will just drag you down and make you colder when you get out. I know what I’m doing.” His arrogance usually made Kate’s blood boil, but at this point it was about she was ready to comitt murder.

“You’ll freeze. I’m going in, Kate. That’s the end of the discussion,” Anthony said in an auhtoriatize tone, one that she had heard so many times in work and it was not one outside of work she responded well to.

“No, this is the end of the discussion” Kate took the plunge and slid quickly into the pond, beginning to flap her limps around as the bitter shock hit her body. Kate let out a string of expletive curses that Mary would slap her for.

It was absolutely baltic.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Anthony shouted at her, but the idiot had jumped in right after her and was treading water beside her.

Newton heard the splashes and looked positively delighted to see Kate and Anthony swimming, splashing as he made his way towards them.

“You shouldn’t have followed me in-”

“I was trying to help you! You shouldn’t have gotten in in the first place. If you had held your dog properly, none of this would have happened.”

“Do you think I did this on purpose?” Do you really think this is how I wanted to spend my Sunday morning?”

“You shouldn’t have a pet if you can’t control it,” Anthony said, his voice seething as they swam towards Newton. “Which, after today’s events, you have certainly proven.”

“I can control him!” Kate weakly responded, having absolutely no comeback. So, she splashed him.

His jaw dropped, droplets of water dripping down his face. “Did you just splash me?”

“Yes.”

His glare intensified. “How old are you again?”

Kate smirked at him. “29. I’m sorry, this must be so hard for you. Talking to a woman over the age of twenty five.”

He splashed her back.

“Ha, ha, ha,” He said, mocking her voice as he grabbed Newton who had swam close enough to them. They both eagerly retreated towards the shore. “Did you think of that one all by yourself?”

They both got out of the pond, choosing to ignore the few people passing by who were staring at them. Kate was too cold to be mortified. Anthony pulled his t-shirt back on and Kate hated herself for feeling slightly disappointed.

They were absolutely soaking and the cool breeze made them shiver more. Anthony gripped Newton’s lead tightly and lay the dog gently onto the path.

Kate smiled sweetly at him, squeezing the excess water out of her soaking t-shirt that was clinging to her skin and stepping towards Edwina. “Newton, shake.”

Newton, who actually decided to do something he was told for once, shook his chubby body and his fur stood up on its coat, water spraying all over Anthony and the path.

“Thanks for that,” He spat, glaring at her as he smirked at her. “Now I smell like a pond and wet dog.”

“You’re so welcome.”

They were looking right at each other, both refusing to break eye contact. She watched as a drop of water fell from his hair, trailing down his nose, making its way all the way to his lips.

She couldn’t stop herself from staring at his lips.

She swore, for a second, she saw his eyes drop to hers.

“Sorry to interrupt whatever is going on here.” Edwina smiled uneasily, glancing between her sister and Anthony who were glaring intensely at each other. She had stood up from the bench and was now standing in front of them. “We should probably go home and take a shower before we freeze to death. There’s a lot of people staring.”

“Capital idea,” Kate said, nodding her head at her sister and taking her hand. “Let’s go right now.”

“Please come to my house for a shower,” Anthony suggested, wrapping his arms around himself.

“No thank you,” Kate said swiftly, gesturing for her sister to follow her. “We’re going home.”

Anthony let out a deep breath through his nostrils. “How far do you live from here?”

It was a twenty minute tube ride and Edwina was at least half an hour. “Near enough.”

“Well, my house is across the road from the park, about two minutes from here.”

“Thank you so much Anthony. We would really appreciate it, wouldn’t we Kate?” Edwina elbowed her with a look and Kate knew she had lost the argument.

The last place she wanted to go was Anthony Bridgerton’s house.

Kate nudged her lead softly, but Newton wouldn’t budge. Edwina and Anthony had already started walking ahead, Anthony placing the lead in Kate’s hand.

Kate begrudgingly went to follow, but Newton refused to move.

“Oh, so now you want to stay put?” Kate said, looking down at Newton who kept himself firmly planted on the ground. He actually had the nerve to roll onto his back, baring his teeth to her.

Her dog was laughing at her.

To be fair, her life was a joke.

“Excellent timing, truly,” She picked him up, carrying him like a newborn baby. Newton was very pleased with himself, wagging his tail happily with his tongue sticking out. “You couldn’t have done this earlier?”

Anthony had been telling the truth, his house was across the road from the park. In one of the most expensive parts of London. The house was huge, a brown brick London townhouse painted ivory. He typed in a code into the gate keypad, the gate beginning to open a few moments later. The three drenched individuals walked up to the stone steps, Anthony stepping forward to unlock the green front door with his key.

The house was beautiful. The high ceilings and cream carpets made the foyer glow, a shimmering chandelier right in the middle of it. There was a glass table in the middle of the foyer, covered in family photographs.

This was the type of house Mary would tell her not to touch anything in.

“Does your mother mind dogs?” Kate asked, holding a half asleep Newton against her chest. He had tired himself out after his eventful morning.

“No. However, I’m not sure what that is,” Anthony replied, glaring at the corgi in her arms.

“Newton should have drowned you when he had the chance,” Kate muttered, and Edwina gasped from beside her.

“Kate!”

“Anthony?” Violet Bridgerton appeared at the top of the stairs, smiling at the three damp individuals at her doorway. “Oh my-what happened to you three?”

“Hello, Mum. We had an incident in Hyde Park. I believe you have met Edwina and Kate Sheffield?”

“It is so lovely to see you again,” Violet kissed both their cheeks, ushering them inside and closing the door behind her. “Oh, you’re all soaked. Anthony can show you upstairs for a shower. I’ll grab you both some clothes and we’ll wash those for you.”

“Oh my gosh,” A tall teenager appeared in the hallway, gasping as she spotted the dog in Kate’s arms and sprinted towards them. Kate hadn’t met this Bridgerton before. She had blue eyes and chestnut hair, strikingly similar to Anthony. “Did we get a dog?”

Violet and Anthony both sighed, “No.”

“How disappointing,” The girl replied, crossing her arms across her chest. “Why are you all wet?”

“Hyacinth, manners,” Her mother scolded her, widening her eyes at her daughter. “This is Kate and Edwina Sheffield. This is my daughter, Hyacinth.”

“Hello, nice to meet you,” Hyacinth said, smiling at the sisters but her attention was solely on Newton. She scratched his ears and he whined happily.

Kate smiled awkwardly. “I’m sorry, I hope you don’t mind dogs in your house. He’s completely harmless, he’s rather tired actually.”

Anthony snorted loudly beside them.

Kate wouldn’t hit her boss in front of his mother.

“Oh, not at all. We love dogs,” Violet said, smiling reassuringly at Kate.

It was Hyacinth’s turn to snort. It was obvious looks were not all she shared with her older brother. “What breed is he?”

Kate smiled at the younger girl. “He’s mostly corgi, but there’s a mix of something else in him. The shelter wasn’t sure what breed though. I adopted him when he was a puppy.”

“Demon, perhaps?” Anthony suggested, turning to smile serenely at Kate.

“Let's get you upstairs,” Violet said, casting a glare at her eldest son as she ushered Edwina and Kate towards the stairs.

“I can take him while you’re gone.” Hyacinth insisted, gleefully taking Newton out of Kate’s arms and wandering back down the hallway out of sight.

They were led up a black staircase with a golden railing to the third floor, to a long hallway full of doors. There at least two more floors above them. Her flat’s building wasn’t even this big.

“Now, Edwina dear, if you go in there. Here’s some clothes and all the towels and linens are in the bathroom,” Violet said, gesturing towards a doorway before turning to Kate. “If you just go into the room next door, Kate dear. Please just shout if there’s anything I can get you.”

“Thank you so much, we seriously appreciate it.” Kate smiled at Anthony’s mother, who turned around to head back downstairs.

“I have a lot of questions, but if I don’t shower first, I might die of hypothermia,” Edwina said, shivering slightly as she opened the door to her bedroom. “To be continued, Kate!”

Kate’s shower was euphoric. The warm water soothed her freezing skin and she washed her hair with the fanciest shampoo and conditioner she had ever used. She had no idea where it was from, but the label was in french and it looked expensive.

She quickly dressed in the cream jumper and joggers left out for her, which fit perfectly.

Kate wanted to delay going downstairs as much as possible, in case Edwina still wasn’t finished and she was left alone with the Bridgertons.

They seemed like perfectly nice people, but they were related to Anthony, and Kate really needed to work on putting as much distance between them as possible.

She had spent the entire weekend distraught over an article about them and she had spent her morning with him, and had ended up in his family home.

Which she was currently snooping around. She had a look through some of the drawers, through the vanity but it appeared to be a guest room. Kate got bored quite quickly, wondering if Edwina was finished. There was a door that appeared to be adjoining between the bedrooms.

“Edwina?” Kate said softly, knocking slowly on the door. Edwina must be done by now. Kate slowly opened the door, expecting to see her sister.

Instead, it led to a half naked Anthony Bridgerton, with a towel wrapped around his waist, freshly showered. His abdominal muscles were defined, easily traceable through the six pac on his chest. She could see the colourful veins protruding out of his muscular arms.

“What the-”

All Kate could do was gape at him. “I’m so sorry!” She squeaked, hastily shutting the door behind her and groaning.

Kate ran for her life.

She grabbed her bag, sprinting down the twirling staircase as fast as she could. She had to find Newton and Edwina immediately.

Kate followed the hallway off the foyer Hyacinth had disappeared down with Newton. At the end of the hallway, there were two large white double doors. Kate could hear voices, so she pushed through.

The room was full of people. She recognized Benedict and Colin, who were chatting animatedly with a girl Kate presumed was their younger sister on the sofa.

Edwina, freshly showered and radiant as ever despite her previous dip in the pond, was sitting on the couch with Gregory and Hyacinth, who was fawning over Newton in her lap.

“Thank you so much for everything,” Kate said, nodding her head at Edwina as she turned to Violet. “We won’t burden you any longer, we’ll get out of your hair.”

Violet Bridgerton smiled warmly at Kate. “Not at all. Please, you must stay for brunch! The whole family is here! The more the merrier.”

Kate glanced at Edwina, who shrugged with a mimosa in her hand. Her sister didn’t look like she was going anywhere.

The door opened behind her, revealing Anthony now dressed in a pair of trousers and a t-shirt. His hair was still wet, droplets dampening his shirt.

“We wouldn’t want to intrude on a family gathering,” Kate said, desperately trying to think of an excuse to get out of this situation. She had seen her boss topless twice today, she wouldn’t look him in the eye again.

“You’re not intruding.” It wasn’t Violet who spoke but Anthony, his deep voice sending tingles down her spine.

“Excellent!” Violet clapped her hands, smiling at Kate before something behind Kate caught her attention. “Hyacinth! Stop feeding that dog our breakfast!”

Anthony walked past her, reaching for a glass of orange juice on the kitchen table before walking towards his brothers. Kate followed him with her eyes until she saw the brunch spread. Their table was set out as if it was Christmas. There were candles, napkins and plates full of food. She had never seen so much food in her life. There were pancakes, bacon, toast and every type of egg prepared every way.

“You look like you need a drink,” A voice to Kate’s right said, which belonged to a petite woman. “I’m Eloise. Mimosa?”

“Please,” Kate said, smiling at her as she gladly took the orange champagne flute. “I’m Kate. It's nice to meet you.”

“Oh I know who you are,” Eloise said, rather smugly as she grinned at Kate. “My dear brother talks about you quite a lot, Kate Sheffield.”

“Pardon?” Kate choked on her drink, coughing to clear her throat as she stared at Eloise. Why would Anthony talk about her? Benedict and Colin had said the same thing in his office a few days ago.

Whatever he said about her, she imagined it wasn’t anything good.

Eloise just smirked, clinking her glass against Kate’s as Violet announced it was time to eat. “Shall we?”

Brunch was going better than expected.

The Bridgertons were fun. It was strange to be in a room with so many people, to watch a large family interact. There was never any silence, everyone was talking and laughing.

It was rather lovely.

Kate and Edwina had grown up with just their parents and since the loss of their father, it had just been them and Mary. They didn’t have any immediate family, their fathers parents were dead and Mary was estranged from her family.

Violet had insisted Kate sit with Anthony on her left and Edwina on her right. Colin was sitting on her right. Colin had muttered something about his mother’s matchmaking attempts, which made Edinwa blush and Kate down her mimosa.

Kate had been introduced to the rest of the Bridgertons she hadn’t met yet. There was Eloise, who was funny but made Kate slightly uneasy. She kept smirking at her. She was 21 and studying History and English at Oxford. She was very opinionated, happily calling her brothers or sisters out on anything she didn’t agree with. Kate could only dream of having her confidence. She was rather brilliant.

Her elder sister was Daphne, who was 25 and made her living off instagram and Youtube. Kate didn’t really use social media, when she did it was mainly to post pictures of Newton. Daphne showed Kate her page, which was the perfect aesthetic. Every picture had the perfect pose and ideal background. Daphne was beautiful and she knew how to attract a following. She had a following of a few million combined on both of her platforms, where she regularly collaborated with brands for sponsorships and advertisements.

Hyacinth was the youngest Bridgerton, with a sharp tongue and a funny sense of humour. Kate already loved her. She was obsessed with Newton, insisting he sit on her lap during the meal and feeding him bits when her mother wasn’t looking, winking at Kate in the process.

It made Anthony laugh.

Kate realized she had never heard him genuinely laugh before.

It was rather lovely.

She had never seen him like this before. He was so eaze around his family. He was happy. He was relaxed, his shoulders were dropped and he didn't look rigid or stressed.

The only Bridgerton missing was Francesca, who was visiting a friend in Scotland.

The table erupted into laughter as Edwina told everyone of the events of that morning, despite Kate’s mortification and Anthony’s fury.

They sounded insane.

“You two make quite the pair,” Benedict said, smirking at Kate and Anthony from across the table. He looked quite delighted with himself.

“How’s your love life, Ben?” Anthony asked, smirking at his brother as he took a sip of his coffee and lay back in his chair. He glanced around the table, daring any of his siblings to tease further.

“So, Kate,” Eloise said, looking at her from across the table. “Tell us about yourself.”

“Oh.” Kate felt her cheeks darken as everyone’s eyes on the table turned towards her. She really didn’t like being the centre of attention. She used to vomit before any public speaking competitions when she was younger. She still got anxious before meetings at work. “I’ve been working at Bridgerton & Family for five years. I have an unstable corgi. There’s not much to tell.”

“Kate has always been the smart one and incredibly modest,” Edwina interrupted, nudging her sister. “She went to Oxford on a scholarship to study business. My parents and I are incredibly proud.”

“That’s incredible, Kate. They must be so proud of the both of you! What do your parents do?” Violet asked Kate, glaring at Gregory who flicked some scrambled eggs at Hyacinth. Hyacinth was too busy feeding Newton bacon under the table to notice.

Kate felt that usual uneasiness spread through her stomach. “My mother is a primary school teacher. My father was an accountant. He died when we were eighteen.”

Silence washed over the table and Kate felt Edwina’s hand squeeze hers under the table. If anyone would understand about losing a father, it was the Bridgertons. They quickly erupted into conversation again.

Anthony turned towards her, his expression unreadable. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

Kate shrugged. “It’s okay. Why would you?”

There was an uneasy silence between Kate and Anthony as they just stared at each other. Kate broke their eye contact, glancing down at her plate.

Eventually, Kate and Edwina stood up to leave as brunch came to an end. Benedict had already left to go to a party and Eloise was nagging Daphne for a lift to the train station to go back to Oxford.

Violet, Anthony and Daphne walked them to the door after they said their goodbyes. Kate had given Hyacinth her number, promising she could walk Newton whenever she wanted if her mum allowed her to. “Girls, I would love it if you and your mother could join us for the long weekend in two weeks. We’re having friends and family over for a party in our house in the country, in Kent.”

“Oh, that sounds lovely!” Edwina said, smiling widely at Kate, Daphne and Violet. The girls had been attached at the hip for most of the afternoon, talking about their careers and the fashion world. Kate had overheard them making plans for drinks sometime this week. Daphne looked delighted at her mother’s invitation.

Anthony? Not so much. He was glaring intensely at his mother, his lips in their usual disgruntled flat line.

“That’s very kind of you,” Kate said slowly, panic flooding her body. She did love the country, but not Anthony Bridgerton’s country house. “I-I’ll have to check my work calendar. We’re very busy this time of year.”

“Excellent! Anthony will make sure you get the time off.” It didn’t sound like a request, Kate was figuring out pretty quickly Violet Bridgerton didn’t ask questions she didn’t already know the answer to.

Anthony walked them to the bottom of the steps, Edwina saying goodbye as she stepped into their uber, leaving them alone.

“I-”

“Kate-”

They spoke at the same time and laughed uncomfortably, insisting the other go first until Anthony spoke.

“The reason I wanted to speak to you this morning was because of the article. I really did want to make sure you were okay. I know that type of attention, when unwanted, is extremely uncomfortable. I’m sorry I indirectly caused it. I didn’t think anyone would see us that night. Not that there was anything to see.”

Kate was momentarily speechless as his words sunk in. “Thank you. I-I know none of it was your fault. I shouldn’t have said that. I wanted to apologize for how I acted earlier and how rude I was. There's no excuse, I've just had a weird few days. Thank you for jumping into the pond for Edwina and Newton.”

Anthony stared at her, a small smile playing on his lips. “I didn’t jump into that pond for Edwina or Newton, Kate.”

Her heart stopped beating in her chest. What?

With that, Anthony turned around and walked away from her, jogging up his steps before he went into his house and closed the door behind him. Kate was left speechless and stunned on the path.

Kate eventually turned around and climbed into the Uber, still processing his words as they drove off and the Bridgerton’s home faded into the background.

Edwina turned towards her sister, leaning towards her. “Kate. What the hell is going on between you and Anthony Bridgerton?”

Kate felt her head fall back against the seat. “I have absolutely no idea.”

[bitsandbobsofwriting]

The Gang FINALLY sees how much of a BAMF Merlin is:

 A smidge of Angst, but only because everyone is stupid :)

Part 4 of Merlin’s angry outburst. The Gang has ridden out (refusing to let Merlin and Arthur go alone) to a battlefield that will only have two bodies on display. One of them is Merlin’s.

This was meant to be the last bit but it was getting so long and I kept thinking of extra shit to put in soooooooo. Hopefully this is the penultimate part? But who knows lol.

TW: Lots of death (the final battle yo)

Part 1   Part 2   Part 3   Part 5

They ride the whole first day in silence. Not even Gwaine has any jokes or stupid stories to tell, and the atmosphere is tense.

The time between Morgana rushing into the council meeting, and the group riding towards what looked to be Merlin's death, had blurred by. No one really had any time to think, but now, riding in silence, all they could focus on was the fact that they were knowingly heading to what could be Merlin’s demise.

No one concentrates on anything but urging their horses to travel as fast as possible, and Arthur shortly telling everyone to stop and make camp were the first words spoken for the whole journey.

No one replies, they just dismount their horses, and wordlessly go about clearing an area for the fire, laying out food, and checking the surrounding area for danger.

Merlin stalks off before anyone can stop him, intent on setting up some wards before anyone settles down. He’s clearly pissed, and Arthur shakes his head when Lancelot gives him a look, “Want me to go with him?” .

Arthur follows instead, trusting the others to set up properly whilst he and Merlin have a much needed private conversation.

It doesn't take too long to find him. He's noticed that, recently. Ever since the link was forged he always seems to be able to find Merlin first try. Before, he had to scour the whole castle to have a chance of finding his wayward manservant (and then his wayward Court Sorcerer), and even then sometimes he couldn't manage it.

It's comforting. In a way. Knowing that they'll always be able to find one another.

Arthur sees him in the trees ahead, facing away from him, his hands up in front of his body. He can hear him muttering something that Arthur doesn’t understand under his breath.

Years ago, Arthur would think that Merlin hadn't noticed him. But Arthur knows him better now. He knows the ever so slight hitch in his Sorcerer’s left shoulder means "I hear you. I see you. I know you're there." .

"You can't know that everything's going to be ok."

Merlin sighs and turns back to look at him, still visibly frustrated with everyone’s obvious fretting. Neither make any moves to walk closer:

"Course I can. I had a chat with Kilgharrah on the way here-"

(He taps his forehead as he says this)

"-no other Emrys-killing weapons have been made, and the only one anywhere near us, is yours. As long as you don’t stab me, I'll be fine."

Arthur huffs and shuffles his feet at this:

"Merlin, the vision. You weren't waking up and you heard what Morgana said. Why are you so intent to ride to what is almost certainly going to be your death, when our armies could win this battle anyway?"

Arthur is trying to sound firm, but his face gives him away. He was never all that good at hiding his true emotions when it was just him and Merlin, and his expression is sad and desperate.

It's only at that, that Merlin walks towards Arthur, putting his hands on his shoulders:

"That vision doesn't show everything. And yes, that may have been the clearest vision Morgana has had during this whole bloody war thing, but the future is still fluid. Nothing is set in stone. Arthur, I'll be fine. And besides, an all out battle means blood spilt, theirs and ours. If I can do anything to prevent that, then there is no choice, not for me."

The King clenches his jaw, before pulling Merlin into a tight hug. The Sorcerer let's out a surprised "oof" but grips back just as tightly, burying a hand in Arthur's hair.

Arthur speaks aloud this time, so quietly Merlin barely hears it even with Arthur's face in his neck. Perhaps thinking this is important enough that it has to be vocalised:

"Why have you got to be so bloody self sacrificial? I couldn't bear to lose you, Merlin. I need you with me, by my side."

Merlin smiles slightly at that, but doesn't let go:

"I'll always be with you. Nothing in this life or the next, could pull me away from you. I...-"

He hesitates here, but Arthur tightens his grip, and he takes a deep breath before continuing:

"-...this is where I belong. Right here, right now. With you."

Arthur squeezes him once again and pulls back, gently laying his forehead against Merlin's, very reminiscent of the spell cast all those weeks ago.

The both of them keep their eyes closed, even as Arthur speaks:

"We're having a conversation about... this, when we get back. We're ALSO having a conversation about your self sacrificial tendencies."

Merlin laughs and pulls back at that:

“Only if we have a conversation about yours first.”

The King rolls his eyes fondly, and turns to walk back, but pauses momentarily, without looking back:

“I may not understand your magical mutterings, but I know that you’ve finished setting the wards up. Are you going to come back? Or are you going to come up with another excuse for you to watch me leave so you can stare at my arse?”

Merlin flushes at that, and lets out a mumbled “Shut up.” before speed walking past a laughing Arthur, towards camp.

The whole group seems to relax once they realise that the tension between Merlin and Arthur had been resolved (or at least... changed. A different type of tension. The type that made Leon want to lay their bedrolls on opposite sides of the camp).

The evening passes quietly, nothing of note happening, and soon enough, everyone is asleep.

The next few days aren’t quite as tense, but they still hurry their horses, taking few breaks. It was wordlessly agreed that they wanted to get there as quickly as possible, so that they might have time to assess the situation properly.

Everyone was still understandably worried, but with Merlin being so relaxed, and Arthur seeming ok (ish) with what was happening, they kept their anxieties to themselves.

It’s the second night they stop to make camp, that Gwaine informs them that if they keep the same pace and get up early, they should be there just before noon the next day. 

Everyone is a little tense at that, but Merlin speaks first:

“I’d say the rain isn’t going to hit until noon. If we move quickly, we should have at least a little time to plan..”

The group once again relaxes at that, grateful that they would at least have time to think things through, and check the surrounding area, before anything happened.

The relaxed atmosphere doesn’t last long, however. When they’d first stopped to make camp (that was around three hours ago now) Morgana had sat straight down, out of the way, and began to meditate. Without warning, she opens her eyes with a flash of gold, and lets a tear slip down her cheek before looking to Merlin.

He furrows his brows, and begins to speak before she can say anything:

“Morgana? What did you see?”

She lets out a humourless laugh, drawing even more worried attention from the group, before she replies:

“I’ve been trying to look past tomorrow. The near future, the far future, anything. Anything that might clue us in to the outcome. You know what I see?-”

Everyone is staring at her, clearly anxious, but she doesn’t take her eyes off Merlin, not even when Gwen places a gentle hand on her shoulder:

“-I see your mother and Gaius, quietly crying. I see Arthur, with a golden crown on his head, and a silver crown in his hands. I see a tombstone, with a name I can’t quite make out. I see your chambers, empty and cold, unlived in and covered in dust. I see... I see us. All nine of us that is, sat around our table. But one of the seats is empty, your seat. And all of us look... blank. That, is what I see, Merlin. And through all of it, I can feel your absence like a flame on my skin. I can see past tomorrow with ease. But I can’t see you.”

Morgana looks devastated. Everyone else in the group looking various mixes of shocked, scared, heartbroken.

Merlin nods slightly, and frowns staring into his lap. He was so certain that... logically, he should be fine. He’s died before and been fine. But Morgana’s visions are rarely that inaccurate, and if she’s stopped seeing his future entirely... well. It wasn’t a good sign.

He hums thoughtfully, before wiping the expression off his face and looking up determinedly:

“That changes nothing. I either do this, and everyone bar me survives, though I still think I’ll be fine, or we ignore your visions entirely, ride back to Camelot, and risk the life of every single one of Camelot’s citizens. And that’s not an option, so we’re just going to have to see what happens.”

Everyone opens their mouth to protest at the same time, but before any of them can make even a sound, Merlin jumps up, and speaks again. His voice is sharp, and invites no argument:

“NO. I said it’s not an option. This is what I do. I always used to hate the idea of a pre-written destiny, but if I’m meant to die tomorrow, then fine. So be it. I will NOT put my own life above anyone else’s. Especially not a whole kingdom’s, and ESPECIALLY not any of yours.”

He breathes deeply, and after giving a short glare to everyone individually, he sits down again. 

He’s seated between Arthur (who had barely left his side) and Percival, who takes the Sorcerer’s hand in his own, holding it in his lap.

Merlin smiles at him as he attempts to pull his hand back:

“I’m fine Perc, I don’t need comforting. I always figured I would end up dying before you lot anyway-”

Everyone shuffles uncomfortably at that. No one likes to think about outliving one of their closest friends:

“-not that I think I’m gonna stay dead anyway. But that’s not the point.”

Percival holds onto Merlin’s hand tightly, but stares into the fire as he replies quietly:

“This isn’t comfort for you, Merlin. It’s comfort for me.”

Merlin seems taken aback at this, like he had only just considered that his friends might need comforting in the first place. He forgets sometimes (read: most of the time) , that he is as important to these people, as they are to him. He can’t imagine willingly going to any of their deaths, not without putting up one hell of a fight.

He nods, after he wipes the shock from his face, and settles his hand in Percival’s, instead of trying to pull away:

“I’m sorry. I know this can’t be easy for any of you-”

(as he speaks, he lets his other hand subtly gather up the fabric of Arthur’s cloak, for his own sake or Arthur’s, he’s not sure)

“-but I need you to trust me. Believe me, I’m not trying to get myself killed permanently... I mean dying even temporarily isn’t exactly fun but... you know. I’ll be fine.”

It’s Gaius that replies first. The others were especially worried about the physician, he was practically Merlin’s father at this point, and none of them thought they could cope with having to comfort the man if they lost Merlin.

“It’s not that we don’t trust you, Merlin. We’re just... worried. And it’s not like you’re well known for considering your own safety when it comes to planning for any sort of conflict.”

Merlin looks as if he’s going to protest, but Gwen beats him to the punch:

“Don’t argue Merlin. You can’t deny that you have a habit of jumping head first into the fray.” She says it with a small smile, but it’s weak, and Merlin suddenly feels guilty for all those times he’s worried his friends. 

He threw himself into situations he was sure he would be able to survive, without considering the fact that none of the people he cared about had the same assurances. 

His reply makes everyone chuckle

“Yeah, well. You know me. I’ve never been much of a planner.-”

The Sorcerer squeezes Percival’s hand once more, before continuing:

“-But it’s late, and if we want to get up early we should head to sleep.”

The group nods in agreement, and all begin to shuffle to their bedrolls, having hushed individual conversations as Arthur declares that he and Merlin would take the first watch.

(No one questions it. They rarely set watches nowadays, Merlin’s wards have become incredibly reliable over the years, but all of them understand that The King and The Sorcerer need this time.)

Other than Merlin and Arthur, Percival was the last to leave his seat, ruffling Merlin’s hair as he gives him a weak smile, before making his way to his roll to undoubtedly toss and turn through the night, like everyone else.

The King and The Sorcerer didn’t move from their spots next to each other, and, at some point during the conversation, Arthur had replaced the clutched fabric of his cloak with his own hand.

They stay silent for a while, not really knowing what to say. Despite everyone’s worries, the rest of the group is asleep after not too long. It had been two days of hard travel and sleeping rough, and no one would admit it but they were all exhausted.

Both of them seem to realise that there was little chance of them getting to have those conversations at a later date. The two of them struggled individually on what would be worse: forcing the conversation now before it was too late but knowing that might be the end of it, or leaving everything unsaid and leaving Arthur with the regret.

Merlin was inclined to leave it unsaid. As far as he was concerned, he would still be fine (though he was now unsure if he was right, or if he was just in denial).

Arthur wanted to get it off his chest. He may be a tad emotionally constipated, but Merlin is... well... Merlin. It took him a while to realise his feelings for Merlin, but once he did, it was like an unending avalanche.

On some level, Arthur knew that Merlin felt the same, but would it be cruel? Or distracting? For him to voice it now, before everything?

He remembers saying weeks ago “We’ve plenty of time before things kick off” . But that time had passed. It had flown by. Arthur thought he would have forever with Merlin, even when the war was declared he wasn’t worried. But suddenly there was no more time. He might lose him tomorrow.

Did he want to taint what few hours they had left with an emotional confession that could wreck them both? Or should he leave it, steadfast in the belief that Merlin knew. Which would be crueller?

In the end, Arthur decided that he wouldn’t be able to live with it: the doubt, the regret, if he never said anything, and... something... happened.

He grips Merlin’s hand tighter in his own, and swallows, but before he could say anything:

“I know.” Merlin doesn’t look at him when he thinks it, but squeezes The King’s hand in return.

“No, I... you have to let me... I’ll never forgive myself if I don’t, so just-”

Merlin does look at him then, and gives him a gentle smile to stop him rambling:

“Ok, Arthur. I’m here, I’m listening, I hear you.”

Arthur meets his gaze, a steady stream of tears down his face that causes Merlin to frown slightly:

“I... Merlin-”

Arthur struggles with the words, thinking back, he can’t remember a time he’s actually said them out loud. Ever.

He clears his throat, straightens his back, and steels his eyes. Merlin deserved the truth. And Merlin felt the same, he had never been more sure of anything:

“Merlin, I love you. And if you don’t come back to me at the end of tomorrow, I will never forgive you.”

His resolve cracks slightly at the end, but Merlin smiles at him fondly, teary eyed himself:

“I love you too. And I already told you, Arthur, I will always come back to you.”

Arthur grips Merlin’s hand tighter, and buries his head in the Sorcerer’s neck. Merlin wrapped his arms around him, and leans back against the log they were sitting against.

They fall asleep like that, the two of them wrapped in Arthur’s cloak. At some point during the night, Arthur’s head had slipped down onto Merlin’s chest, but neither moved. If anything, Arthur found he could sleep easier with Merlin’s steady heartbeat in his ears.

~

The Gang woke when it was still dark, but not in the way they had planned.

They all wake with a start, automatically pulling out swords and summoning weapons, before they realise that the blizzard like wind and deafening roar, was just Kilgharrah, landing on the edge of their camp.

They settle for only a moment, before they realise that Merlin hadn’t summoned him, which meant he turned up of his own volition, and that meant he brought news. And knowing Kilgharrah, it probably wasn’t good news.

Merlin approaches him quickly, a frown on his face and Arthur close behind him:

“What is it Kilgharrah, is Camelot ok?”

The Dragon lowered his head to meet Merlin’s worried stare before replying:

“Yes, the city is safe, young Warlock. I have left Aithusa to watch over it whilst I tracked you here. The army you face is in front of you, not behind you.”

Morgana speaks up quickly after that, a frown on her face:

“What army? I haven’t foreseen any big battles in a while, believe me, I’ve been looking. The only people that should be in that meadow, is us, and whoever... and one other man.”

Kilgharrah looks over the group slowly before looking back at Merlin and replying:

“It appears, Emrys, that you will finally get a chance to show off the extent of your power. An army is waiting for you, in that meadow, and you are the only one with the capacity to defeat them.”

Merlin takes a deep breath, and clenches his hands (one of which is quickly taken by Arthur. Another example of neither of them knowing which of them the action was meant to comfort):

“I don’t know if I’m that powerful Kilgharrah, I’ve never-”

“The only reason you do not know the breadth of your power, is because you’ve never before come even close to your limits.”

“But I-”

“Your magic is tied to nature, Emrys. Use it. Bend it to your will. The entirety of the world will move at your whim, you need only ask-”

Before Merlin can reply, or ask what the hell that means, Kilgharrah lifts his head suddenly, as if hearing something, and looks briefly to Merlin once more as he replies, before flying off:

“Have faith, young Warlock, in yourself and in destiny. I must leave you now.” 

Everyone stands still, not quite in shock, but definitely confused, all bar Merlin, who just looks annoyed:

“Fucking typical. What’s the use of being a Dragon Lord if my giant pet lizard is going to be so bloody cryptic all the time.” is mumbled by the Warlock, as he looks towards the sun, just about rising over the horizon.

He sighs once more, before:

“Come on then. I suppose that was a good a wake up call as any. We should pack up and get going if we want to get a look at this army.-”

The next bit is mumbled to himself as he lets go of Arthur’s hand and wanders off to dismantle the wards:

“-And I suppose I now have half a day’s journey to figure out to beat it. That’s just great.”

It only takes a moment before the group launches into action, now freshly tense at the revelation that there was an army, and there was only ten of them.

They had faith in Merlin, and Morgana was there as well. And if everything really went to shit, there could be two dragons there to lend a helping hand (or claw) as well. But still. An army. That was big.

They’re riding out on the last leg of the journey within an hour, everyone having regained the tenseness that they had on the first day. Though all of them are slightly comforted by the fact that Kilgharrah hadn’t mentioned Merlin dying. He may be a cryptic bastard, but that definitely seemed like something he would bring up.

~

Gwaine’s directions and timings were accurate, they reached the edge of the seemingly empty meadow around half an hour before the sun hit the centre of the sky.

They remain hidden in the trees, Merlin casting a quick enchantment to shield them from being detected, before looking to Morgana and nodding.

The two of them close their eyes and stretch their arms forward, towards the meadow. A few mutterings and tilted heads later, they open their eyes. Merlin looking grim, but determined, and Morgana looking scared.

Lancelot is the first to speak:

“What is it, what’ve they go out there?”

Merlin looks at him briefly, before darkly saying:

“Why don’t I show you?”

With that, he once more raises his arm towards the meadow. His eyes glow brightly and he speaks quietly, other hand clenched at his side.

After a few moments, tendrils of light extend from his fingertips, and snake out around the perimeter of the meadow. Once the meadow is surrounded, Merlin twists his wrist sharply, and the tendrils turn inwards, shooting towards the centre point. After only a few metres they seem to meet an invisible barrier, and explode upwards towards the sky.

The light is blinding enough to force the gang to all shield their eyes, but they quickly open again when they hear an uproarious cacophony of noise.

What they see, is a huge army gathered at the far end of the field, packing up camp and preparing to move off, in the direction of Camelot.

It takes only a moment before a voice rings out above the noise, coming from somewhere around the edges:

“THE BARRIER IS DOWN!! WE CAN BE SEEN!”

A voice answers back, shouting for everyone to be prepared, that they would be noticed soon, and that the fight was coming to them.

Arthur furrowed his brow before quietly:

“That was their King, I recognise his voice. He must have sorcerers with him to keep the barrier going.”

Leon answers first:

“This is why our scouts haven’t seen anything, there’s been nothing to see.”

Merlin once again begins muttering to himself, drawing everyone’s attention to him (and also reminding them that apparently, Merlin had the power to take out the whole army) :

“Well, at least it’s smaller than I was expecting, underestimating us apparently. Sorcerers could be a problem though. Hmm.”

Morgana speaks up:

“I feel three. powerful, but not really fighters. They’re here for the barrier, and they don’t seem particularly happy about it either-”

She looks towards Merlin, face serious:

“-If you make it clear who you are... they might join us.”

Merlin hums thoughtfully, before replying:

“Depends entirely on if their fear of me outweighs their fear of him.”

The Gang looks taken aback at the mention of fearing Merlin. Elyan quietly saying:

“Why would they fear you? I know that you’re Emrys and everything, but I thought it was a Druid peace-keeping sort of thing you had going?”

Merlin looks back at the group, anger on his face, as he responds darkly:

“They’re threatening Camelot, her people, her King. I’m very much pissed off right now, of course they should be scared of me.”

Before he has time to say anything else, they notice that the army is about ready to move out, and Arthur gestures everyone to quickly get back and hide as he rushes towards Merlin:

“Merls! Ok... so, in the vision, the field was already empty when it started raining, and we have maybe 15 minutes at most before then, so what happens? Whatever we do, we need to do it now, they’re about to leave. Or maybe the field was empty because we let them go?”

Merlin responds quickly:

“No, we didn’t see the whole field in the vision remember, and this half is empty-”

He thinks for a moment, and Arthur looks towards the army, before looking back at the others, and then finally settling his eyes on Merlin once more:

“-Put your crown on, you and me are going to march across there, and they need to know who we are. The others will stay here, out of sight.”

Arthur looks worried, and put a hand on Merlin’s shoulder:

“You do know what you’re doing, don’t you?”

Merlin smiles back at him:

“Nah, figured I’d just wing in. Come on, I’m Emrys. I got this in the bag.”

Arthur frowns as Merlin chuckles, before grabbing his crown from his saddlebag. The others looks to him questioningly, but he just shakes his head, and gestures for them to stay hidden. They don’t look too pleased at that, but they follow his orders, and hide themselves and the horses among the bushes.

The King and the Sorcerer take a deep breath, before looking at each other and nodding firmly. They march out from their hiding spot amongst the trees, and make a beeline for the army, walking confidently.

Merlin made sure to walk just a step behind Arthur, and it takes only a few seconds for a lookout to spot them and yell.

The two of them stop in the middle of the empty space as the whole army looks towards them, their King stepping forward:

“Ah! King Arthur-”

The way he says King, like it disgusts him, like Arthur doesn’t deserve the title, has Merlin fuming, but he doesn’t step forward just yet.

“-It would seem that you have bought your druid pet, to beat my army. I WILL SEE YOUR HEADS ON SPIKES!”

Spittle flies from his red face as he screams the last part, and Merlin sees the way Arthur clenches his hand. Before his... friend? (can he say that after last night?) can reply in anger:

“Introduce me, and then go back to the others. I’ll be fine, he’s clearly underestimated me.”

Arthur’s back straightens, and he leaves his face blank as he shouts his reply to the angered King:

“You clearly underestimate us. This-”

(he gestures absentmindedly to Merlin, who steps forward and allows his eyes to begin glowing.)

“-is Emrys. He will make quick work of your... army.” 

Neither of them pay attention to his reply as they look at each other. The glow fades from Merlin’s eyes as he puts a hand on Arthur’s shoulder:

“Trust me, go back to the others and I’ll take care of it. All of nature is at my fingertips, apparently. Go, I love you.”

Arthur clenches his jaw and nods, before turning and walking back to the others, smiling to himself as he notices the almost transparent shield that had formed around him as he walked.

Merlin takes a few steps towards the army (which is getting louder and louder as the King makes his way through the ranks, shouting encouragement and rallying them) before stopping in place and frowning.

Unless he wants to cause issues with time, he should probably keep it as similar to the vision as he can. He looks to the side, the same place he had seen himself look four days ago, and speaks:

“ I’m sorry. But it’s coming. I can’t stop it, I tried. This is the only way. Just... relax... it’ll hurt less. Four days.”

He narrows his eyes and focuses, and he can just about make out a hazy mirror image of himself stood a few feet away:

“Arthur loves you... me..... us. Don’t let him down.”

The image fades as he takes a deep breath, and continues his march towards the army.

There’s a clap of thunder, and suddenly the skies open, Merlin frowns to himself as he mutters:

“Oh for fucks sake, why am I always right?”

The army begins their sprint towards him, and Merlin stops his quick pace, planting his feet, and raising his hands to the sky. The Sorcerer figures that there’s already a storm, and a storm is part of nature, right? He might as well take advantage.

The golden glow from his eyes is almost blinding as his brings his hands down quickly, palms facing the floor. Lightening strikes the ground with a flash and a few hundred of the men at the forefront of the army fall to not rise again.

Merlin grunts as he realises he’s going to have to try a lot harder if he’s to succeed in taking out the 12,000 angry arseholes running at him.

He continues aiming lightening at the fastest knights, nearest the front, taking out groups of them at a time.

He feels another magical presence, and he glances to the side to see a young woman at the edge of the meadow, clothes in tatters and feet bare. She meets his gaze and nods, before looking to the army and shouting a spell. The ground shakes slightly and a large chunk of the army falls into cracks into the ground.

Those his lightening had not touched finally come within reach of Merlin, and he has to jump back as swords reach for his neck. He swings one of his arms in a wide arc, and a burst of blue fire elevates the war cries around him, into screeches of agony.

He has to banish dark thoughts as the stench of burnt flesh reaches his nose, and he swings his arm wide once more, the same again.

Now with a little more space to move, though with little time before he’s crowded again, he kneels, and slams closed fists down into the mud.

The moment his skin touches the ground, the whole meadow shakes, much more than it had previously, and the whole army stumbles and falls.

There is a moment of silence and calm once the shaking stops, everyone trying to regain their bearings, but it doesn’t last long, as the ground opens. Sinkholes and cracks expand all across the meadow, thousands of men screaming as they fall into unknown depths, or drown in mud.

Merlin stares out in wonder as he realises he hasn’t said a word since the battle began. He had used no spells, the world around him simply understood what he wanted, and obeyed his orders. Nature bending to his whim indeed.

His thoughts last only a minute before he forces himself to concentrate once more. He can feel the three other sorcerers trying to protect themselves, and prevent anyone from escaping. Looks like Morgana was right. Though they were exhausted from holding the barrier in place, and even if they hadn’t been, even combined, their power was nothing compared to Merlin’s.

He pulls his arms from the ground, palms facing towards the sky (which is still pouring). As he does, every crater, every pit, closes with a snap, the field seeming suddenly much emptier as half the army, and all the previous bodies, disappear into the mud.

Only a thousand or so men remain, and, ignoring their cowardly King’s shouts (he was hidden somewhere to the right of Merlin, out of his sight. Hmmm. He would have to take care of that later.) they try to scatter into the woods surrounding the meadow.

Merlin closes his hands to fists. Vines and roots burst from the ground, all sharp thorns and gnarled wood as they speed towards the fleeing soldiers.

The screams grow louder once more as all but a few of the knights are pierced, and wrapped, and dragged towards their muddy places of burial.

Merlin stands once more, and tilts his head towards the trees with a silent request.

He smirks as the sounds of wolves reach his ears, howling and growling and rabid through the trees. That’ll do it. No one would be able to outrun them.

The battlefield lay empty. The bodies having been swallowed by the earth, or still running around piss scared in the woods.

Merlin turns towards the sorcerers standing twenty metres away, meaning to promise them safety and amnesty in Camelot, because of their immediate willingness to help, but before he can say anything, he sees their eyes widen as they look behind him in horror.

He gasps in realisation, and goes to turn and defend himself, but before he can, he staggers suddenly forward as he feels a bursting pain in his spine and spread through his chest. He looks down to see the front of a sword poking out from where his heart should be.

With his last few seconds of lucidity he jerkily waves his hand behind him and feels the King (”How could I have fucking forgotten about him? I was thinking about him literally 3 minutes ago??”) stumble back a few steps, leaving the sword behind.

Merlin falls to his knees, still staring at the end of the blade, blood dripping from his mouth as he hears an agonised yell from across the meadow.

He finally falls completely, his face angled towards the floor and his eyes fluttering as he hears a metallic *swoosh* and a *gargle* and a *thump* behind him, before Arthur falls to his knees at his back.

The last thing Merlin remembers, is hearing Arthur muttering something or other as he gets pulled towards him, but by the time his eyes look to the sky, his mind, and face, are blank.

~

THIS IS COMPLETED, PART 5 (link at the top, and in the masterlist) IS THE FINAL PART!

Let me know if y’all want my thoughts on anything in particular :)

[outrebanx]

Dragonfly - Chapter 5

JJ Maybank x female!reader series

Summary: Things are weird between you and JJ for a few days, but all is forgotten when he turns up on your doorstep, covered in bruises again

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: ANGST - mentions of abuse and death, injuries, maybe some swearing I cant remember

A/N: I love writing angst as I can relate to it so much more and it helped my mood today isn’t great but I hope the chapter flows well enough and people like it - and as always feedback is appreciated :) (little flashback in italics)

Catch up: Chapters 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 

You woke up to the sun shining into your room, turning over you were met with empty space, you opened your eyes to see nothing where JJ had been laying the night before. You had agreed to go to John B’s together, why would he leave without telling you?

You sat up, not understanding why you felt so hurt at him leaving, you had helped him, and him you last night, but I guess now he was sober, he didn’t want your help. You couldn’t spend too much time thinking about this though, you needed a shower desperately and then you were still going to head to John B’s, whether JJ was there or not.

Only once you’d got into the shower, did your mind finally focus on the pain you felt in your arms, the one Rafe had grabbed now had a dark purple bruise covering a lot of the forearm, and the hand you had punched him with was also swollen and it ached. This was possibly the worst way you’d woken up in a while, but in all honesty you didn’t want to deal with your injuries or spend anymore time thinking about JJ. So you quickly finished your shower, wrapped a bandage around your hand, took some painkillers and got ready for the day ahead.

John B’s house was quiet when you got to it, most likely John B (and the others if they crashed there) were still asleep, and you didn’t want to wake them, so you made your way to the end of the dock where you sat and looked over at the water, lost in thought.

You had been looking out on a calm water, similar to the marsh you were looking at now, your mum at your side, sitting in silence whilst you both listened to the sounds of nature around you. The birds in the trees chirping their songs like they do every morning, the wind making its way through the trees, rustling the leaves as it went, and the early buzzing of the insects around you. This had been the lake where you’d had your moment with the dragonflies, it truly felt like a magical place to you, as if it was out of a fairy tale.

Your mum and you had spent many mornings like this, enjoying the calm before the day revealed what it had in store for you, it gave you a chance to breathe.

This particular morning, your mum had dragged you out of bed to go here with her, neither of you ever bothered getting your dad to come as he was the opposite of a morning person, and you kind of liked the ritual staying between the two of you.

You had been sat there for around 10 minutes before your mum started speaking, “No matter what happens in life never forget this place or what it means to us.”

You looked at her in confusion, “what?”

“Promise me, please, that you won’t forget this Y/N.” Her eyes seemed pained enough that you didn’t ask her anymore questions and said instead, “Of course I promise.”

At this response your mum had just wrapped her arm around you and kissed the top of your head, not realising you had felt a tear fall onto the same spot a moment later.

-

You were shaken from this memory when you heard someone call your name, their footsteps heading towards you. You cursed yourself for allowing your thoughts to move towards that memory, still not ready to face some of the pain you felt, especially in a place where someone could see, so with the footsteps getting closer you quickly wiped away the couple of tears that had fallen without you realising and turned to see John B approaching you.

You smiled at him, “Morning sunshine, how are you feeling today?”

“Better than expected actually,” he sat down next to you, “how about you? How’s the hand?”

“To be honest it aches a little,” you moved it in front of him, showing him the bandage, “but maybe worth it if Rafe feels worse this morning.”

He laughed, “God let’s hope so, I’m not sure his ego will easily recover from being hit by a girl in front of other people.”

You two fell into an easy silence for a minute or two before John B got up, clapping his hands together, “Right, I think it’s time we tried to wake up the others,” he held out a hand to help you up, “come on.”

You grabbed his hand with your good one and made your way back to the Chateau, falling back slightly when he first went inside, but you took a breath and went in.

The sight you saw made you smile, Pope was in an unnatural position asleep on the pullout with Kiara half off the other side, also sleeping peacefully.

John B was heading to what was probably the spare room, most likely for JJ, when you said to him, your voice hushed, “What’s the best way to wake them up without being killed?”

“No method I’ve ever tried has really worked so do what you want, but good luck and don’t let them kill you.”

You laughed, put your hand to your forehead and saluted him, “Yes sir.”

He was still laughing when he disappeared into the room, you looked down at the pair in front of you, assessing how you could wake them up. In the end you decided to risk their annoyance, as with the awkward way they’d been sleeping, there was room in the middle for you to jump.

You launched yourself onto the bed, falling down between them and jolting the bed enough that Kie fell off in shock and Pope managed to smack himself in the face. The anger on their faces didn’t last long as the cackle you’d let out at the scene you’d just witnessed was just as funny to them, so soon you were all sat there, Kie still on the floor, just laughing together.

“Why the fuck are you all so loud?” You heard JJ from the door, the silence died down, on your part it was from shock at how rough he looked this morning, you’d frozen when you’d seen the number of bruises on his face, and you dreaded to think what his torso looked like under the shirt he was wearing.

You made eye contact with him, before he could do or say anything though, you looked away, instead looking at John B who had given you a thumbs up for your method of waking up Kie and Pope. You gave him a big smile and bowed slightly, causing him to chuckle.

The rest of the day went by quite quickly, at first it was quite calm, the others recovering from the hangovers they had, luckily you’d always managed to avoid hangovers somehow, and then for the rest of the day you were all out on the boat.

Throughout the day you had felt JJ’s eyes on you, probably waiting for you to talk to him, but you avoided his eyes, still not sure you wanted to talk to him, especially with how your emotions had broken through your barriers that morning on the dock. On days that happened you were usually careful in avoiding any sort of emotional situation, and you felt like talking to JJ about why he had left without saying anything could become emotional, so even if it made you look a little bitchy, you did your best to avoid him.

Unfortunately Kie had picked up on how you were acting and pulled you to the side, away from the boys who were chatting at the wheel of the boat.

“Hey, what’s happened between you and JJ?”

“Nothing, I’m just not in the mood for his antics today.”

“Bullshit, you’re actively avoiding him, he has a face of a hurt puppy, the boys haven’t picked up on it cos they’re idiots, but I’m not.” She crossed her arms waiting for your answer.

“I don’t know why he looks like a ‘hurt puppy’ as you say, all I know is I let him stay round mine last night because I didn’t want him walking home in the state he was in, and when I woke up this morning he had already left, not even leaving a note.”

Kie was about to speak but you continued on, “and I’m being truthful when I say nothing happened, I’ve just had a difficult morning, and talking to him might make it worse, so I’m helping myself instead of him today. Okay?”

She gripped your hand, squeezing it slightly, “I can talk to him if you want?”

“No it’s honestly fine, I just don’t want to deal with him much today.”

“Okay then, we will relax together, and have a JJ free day.”

You smiled at her, thankful you’d met someone like her, someone who didn’t push too much and understood your wishes.

The rest of the day played out smoothly, JJ didn’t try and approach you, but the group as a whole had a good day out. Good enough that you were exhausted by the time you got home, quickly saying hi to your dad and avoiding him seeing the bruise on your arm, then heading to bed where you fell into a deep sleep very quickly.

—————

The next few days you were back at work, and you almost never saw anyone from the group, apart from Kie obviously, who you had a couple of shifts with, but you still hadn’t really spoken to JJ since the night of the Kegger. You now wanted to though, and it annoyed you slightly that he hadn’t tried speaking to you, probably thinking you’d still be slightly distant with him - but this whole situation was more due to him than you, you thought.

You decided that as you had a day off tomorrow, and were probably going to see the Pogues, you would try to talk to JJ then - at least try to get things back to how they were before the other night. The plan now made out in your head, you began to relax slightly, no longer feeling the awkward pang in your chest when you thought of him.

The rest of your work day went by without any issue, and by the time you’d had a pizza with your dad for tea, you still weren’t that tired, so instead of laying in your bed for another night in a row, you decided to go surfing.

The beach was quiet when you got there, nobody really out at this time, and you liked it. The night sky was reflected on the water, the sounds of the waves calmed your mind and heart, but it was only when you were about to step into the water that you realised the water might be too calm to surf. You didn’t want to go back home just yet though, so you left your board on the beach, and dove into the waves.

After being under the water for a minute, you resurfaced, treading water and keeping an eye on your position so the currents couldn’t move you too much without you realising; you stayed like this for a while, every now and then going back under water for as long as you could manage. Eventually your body began to tire, and you swam back to shore, grabbing your board from where you left it and got back into your car to head home.

—————

You were unlocking the door to your house when you heard movement behind you, you tried not to react, instead thinking about what you could use to protect yourself if needed, unfortunately all you had were the keys in your hand, so you turned around, ready to see what was behind you.

The sight was not what you expected, it was worse, you were frozen as you looked at JJ, blood running down his face, new bruises already forming over the ones from the other night, he wasn’t putting much weight on one of his legs and he had tears in his eyes.

Quickly shaking yourself out of the shock you had felt, you rushed towards him, “Holy shit JJ, what’s happened? Are you okay?”

His voice was gravelly, as if he’d been shouting, or screaming you thought with a shiver, “I went to your window but you weren’t there, so I waited here - I can go if you want.”

“Absolutely not,” you took his hand, already pulling him in the direction of your house, “I’ll clean you up again, yeah?”

You had turned to see if he was going to answer, but all he did was nod slightly, a tear falling down his cheek. The sight broke your heart and it took all your willpower to not cry as well.

He was silent - silent when you indicated for him to sit on the counter like last time, silent whilst you cleaned out his cuts and put ice on his wounds, silent when you led him into your room and sat him down on your bed. The only noises he ever made were sniffles or a hiss of pain when you cleaned out a bad cut.

You didn’t know what to do, whether you should ask him if he wanted to talk or to leave him alone completely. You crouched down in front of where he was sat, eye level with him, “Hey, will you be alright if I leave you for like five minutes? I’ve been in the sea so I kinda need a shower, but I don’t have to if you want me here with you.”

He looked at you, and shook his head and pointed back to the bathroom, showing he was fine with you leaving. You weren’t used to this quiet version of JJ, it unnerved you and made you want to break down in tears, but you couldn’t, at least not in front of him. So in the few minutes you were in the shower, you allowed a few tears to fall, heartbroken at the sight of him like this, but by the time you were back in your room, there was no sign of the emotions you’d let out, you were just ready to help him in any way you can.

He had settled down into your bed when you got back, the bruises on his chest obvious even in the dim light of your room, you made your way into bed next to him, laying on your side so you were facing him.

“You obviously don’t have to talk about it, but if you do want to I’m here for you.” He looked at you and the hand you’d held out for him to hold if he wanted it.

He put his hand in yours, still not saying anything, so you squeezed it and waited.

After a minute or so, he began speaking, “Um my dad did this to me,” you couldn’t help but let out a gasp at this, “he does it to me quite a lot actually, it’s why I spend so much time at John B’s - tonight it was because I wasn’t in the best of moods and didn’t get him a beer when he asked, so he told me how worthless I am, and that he wished I was dead.”

He sniffled, avoiding looking at you after what he said, completely unaware of the tears that were falling down your face, no longer contained by your resolve.

You squeezed his hand, “I may not have known you for a long time, but I know for a fact you’re not worthless, and the world would be an awful place if you were dead.”

He looked at you, likely still not convinced about what you were saying, so you continued, “You were one of the first people I met when I moved here, and because of my mum’s death, I wasn’t in the best of places, but everyday I have spent with you and the Pogues since have made my life a happier place again, you have especially had a part in that.”

You smiled at him, and to your delight, he smiled back.

You two lay like that for a while, holding hands in a comfortable silence. To your surprise it was JJ who broke the silence, “I’m sorry.”

“What for?” You looked at him confused

“For leaving the other day without telling you, I just panicked because you saw me vulnerable and you were being so nice, I didn’t want you to see me differently or something, so I thought I’d leave.”

Just as you were going to respond, he continued talking, “and then you wouldn’t even look at me the next day and I thought I’d really messed up, and I was going to talk to you, but I don’t know, I just couldn’t bring myself to.”

Before he could continue rambling, and making himself feel worse again you interrupted, “Hey, you hadn’t messed up or anything, yes I was a little annoyed at you leaving without telling me, but I knew you must of had a reason, and I was having other issues that day so I wanted to avoid emotions and stuff if that makes sense.”

“Yeh it does, maybe you can talk to me about that stuff sometime if you’re up for it, and I’m really glad I haven’t messed anything up because I think I might like you Y/N.”

You couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face, “That’s lucky, I think I might like you as well JJ Maybank.”

He pulled you closer, you put your head on his chest, careful not to hurt his bruises too much, and fell asleep like that, happy and content at the idea of being with the person beside you.

Taglist: @jellyfishbeansontoast @tangledinsparkles @k-k0129 @jjsbxtch @outerbankslove @obx-beach @emerald-xcd  @danicarosaline​ @belledutchess @teamnick​ @justcallmesams​ @claryherondaleparker​ 

[geraltrogerericduhautebellegarde]

Misery and Happiness Ch. 1

Chapter 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Summary: Word of an injured, possibly dead witcher has reached Jaskier in his travels and as much as he would like to walk away, he knows he can't.

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Jaskier frowned heavily into his ale while listening to the three men behind him gossip.

For two days, every tavern he entered was subject to strange mutterings about a witcher, gone mad and injured, probably dying. The bard was used to hearing gossip about witchers but never before had it seemed so factual. The words whispered seemed to hold a grain of truth to them that had Jaskier worrying.

Jaskier had been trying not to think of witchers in general for the past six months, or at least one particular, angry, emotionally constipated witcher, but the worry was starting to overpower the ache in his heart.

“Hey, where did you say that witcher was last seen?”

Geralt was moving through the woods that supposedly held a wyvern nest, trying to quiet his mind. Ever since that blasted mountain his mind had been working overtime, making sure he remembered every mistake he had made, every life he had managed to ruin. More painfully, he kept hearing himself, yelling awful, destructive words at the one person that had never judged him, never abandoned him.

The pounding in his temples grows as he thinks of his bard. No, not his bard, the bard. The bard that had spent most of the last two decades by his side, doing everything he could to make Geralt’s life easier. The bard that Geralt used to be able to think of as his own but now, after Geralt had used harsh words to push him away, now he was simply the bard that Geralt wasn’t sure he would be able to live without.

Finding the nest, Geralt makes quick work of the wyverns. He acted on instinct and killed like the monster he was made to be. It wasn’t until after the wyverns were dead, he noticed the sharp stinging and intense throbbing in his side. Looking he could tell his armor had been seriously pierced and his side seemed to be flayed open. A mistake, one that could cost him his life, a witcher’s retirement.

Jaskier would be so mad that he let himself get hurt.

No, he quickly cut off that thought process. Jaskier was gone, had left when Geralt attacked with the sharp stab of words.

Suddenly overcome with exhaustion, Geralt held his side and stumbled away from the nest. Finding an outcropping of rocks not too far away, he quickly sunk to his knees before downing a bottle of swallow. He laid on his uninjured side and soon was unconscious.

Faces flitted through Geralt’s subconscious, the shadow he remembers of his mother, the pride on Vesemir’s face after he survived the trials, the shock on Pavetta’s face when Geralt claimed the law of surprise, the anger on Yennefer’s face upon learning of his unwanted child, the pain on Jaskier’s face when Geralt accused him of causing every problem destiny had thrown him.

-

The village Jaskier had been pointed to was only a day away from the one in which he had been, so he set out immediately. The chance that the rumors were true, that there was a witcher hurt and in need of help, was too large to be ignored. Even if it weren’t the witcher Jaskier knew so well, he would do everything in his power to help.

The village was small and only had one inn so Jaskier quickly hurried there, hoping the innkeep would have some information. Heading inside the inn Jaskier went to the bar, “Hello, my good sir” he greeted the innkeep enthusiastically, “might there have been a witcher in town, a few days ago perhaps?” he finished with a smile.

The innkeep frowned, “Aye, took a contract for something stealing livestock, lived in the woods. Witcher went in never came out.”

“I’ve heard word the witcher was injured, if he never came out how does anyone know that?” Jaskier questioned, smiling falling.

“Well, the livestock ain’t been attacked since so one of the boys went looking around the woods. Found the witcher, hurt and lying in a cave. The boy tried to help him but the witcher was out of his mind, wouldn’t let the boy near him. Poor Tomas came back a right mess,” explained the innkeep.

“How long ago was this?”

“Four days back.”

“Where is Tomas? I need to talk to him.”

The innkeep pointed to a table in the corner where a tall lanky young man was eating from a bowl. Jaskier nodded his thanks and quickly made his way to where Tomas was seated.

“Hello,” Jaskier started, sitting across from Tomas, “I don’t mean to bother you during your meal I just need to know where you found that witcher.”

“U-uhm, I wouldn’t go looking for the likes of him. Was dangerous, didn’t know what was happening around him. Honestly probably dead now, didn’t look very well,” Tomas startled out, wide eyed.

Jaskier smiled tightly, eyes glinting dangerously, “Tomas, darling, none of that information was what I asked. Where. Is. The. Witcher.”

Jaskier leaned further over the table toward Tomas and the boy leaned away quickly and hurried to tell Jaskier exactly how to get to the rock outcropping where he had found the witcher.

“One last thing, could you describe what he looked like? The witcher?”

“Ahh, well. Big. Yellow eyes like a cat. White hair.”

Jaskier felt a heavy weight settle in his stomach and hurried back to the innkeep, “the witcher’s horse, did he leave it or take it with him?”

The innkeep frowned, “she’s still stabled up here, didn’t want him coming back to me having sold her off. Figured I’d wait a couple weeks,” the man explained.

“Well I’ll be taking her off your hands,” the innkeep immediately started to protest Jaskier’s words before the bard cut him off, “here, for the trouble of keeping her stabled.”

The innkeep looked at the generous pile of coin Jaskier had set on the bar before nodding to the bard.

Jaskier hurried to the stable and breathed a sigh of relief at seeing Roach. He quickly saddled her up and led her out of the stable, “C’mon girl, it’s time to find our witcher.”

-

Jaskier’s heart thunders as he rides along the edge of the woods searching for a rock outcropping said to hold a dying witcher. The wood here was sparse, the trees spaced far apart and the light from the noon sun was filtering through nicely. He should be able to spot Geralt.

Soon enough Jaskier spotted an outcropping ahead that matched Tomas’ description and he urged Roach faster.

And there, under the rocks, was Geralt.

Jaskier jumped off Roach and rushed to Geralt’s side. The witcher was filthy, covered in blood and dust and dirt and Jaskier heard himself let out a sob as he reached for the witcher to check for a pulse. He closed his eyes waiting and finally felt the witchers slow heartbeat, slower than normal, Jaskier thought. And certainly weaker than it should be.

Shaking Geralt gently, Jaskier tried to wake him, but the best he got was a muttered cry that Jaskier couldn’t understand. Jaskier frowned, the witcher, who normally ran on the colder side of body temperatures, was burning up. Taking stock of the witcher’s body Jaskier found a large gash in his side that, while it seemed mostly closed, also seemed incredibly infected.

With a great bit of struggle Jaskier, with Roach’s help, manages to get Geralt up and in her saddle before quickly climbing up behind him.

Geralt rouses some on the ride but his eyes remain unfocused and he doesn’t respond to anything Jaskier says, almost as if he can’t even tell he’s there, pressed up behind him, holding tightly enough to keep him on the horse.

“Geralt please say something,” Jaskier pleads.

Geralt lets out a pained moan and slumps further into Jaskier’s embrace as his eyes close again.

[imjustthemechanic]

The Price of a Soul

Part 1/? - Agent Russel Part 2/? - The Letter Part 3/? - Miss Lake Part 4/? - The Stewardess Part 5/? - An Assassination Part 6/? - Fallout Part 7/? - Face to Face Part 8/? - Deals, Details, and Other Devils Part 9/? - Baggage Part 10/? - Private Funding Part 11/? - Just Passing Through Part 12/? - Party of Four Part 13/? - Resolute Part 14/? - The Wreck Part 15/? - Body Snatchers Part 16/? - Out of the Frying Pan Part 17/? - A Miracle

And now the moment we’ve all been waiting for.

-

Like everything on board a ship, the boiler room was no bigger than it had to be and stuffed to the gills with pipes and cables, switches and dials and pieces of equipment.  There was only barely room to get the gurney through the door, and as they did, Peggy heard a siren start to blare.  In wartime that would have let the crew know they were under attack.  Now it could only be telling them that the body-snatching had been discovered.

Peggy left pushing the gurney to Kay, and ran ahead to open one of the boilers.  Even with the doors closed, it was sweltering hot in the room.  She could feel sweat trickling down her back under her heavy winter coat as she strained at the wheel.  Even if they didn’t manage to get Steve into the fire, she thought, at the very least this heat would start to thaw his tissues… once that happened they would begin to decompose, and Masters’ scientists might not be able to learn anything from them.

At first the wheel that held the door shut wouldn’t budge.  Peggy braced herself against a pipe and put her back into it, and it made a horrible metallic scrape as it began to move.  A few more cranks, and Peggy’s shoulders would be stiff for days, but the door sprang open.  A wall of heat rolled out into the room.  She ran back to grab the body under the shoulders, drop cloth and all.

“Wait!”  Kay grabbed Steve’s ankles as Peggy tried to drag him off the gurney.  “What are you doing?”

“I’m burning him!” she replied.  “What am I supposed to be doing?”

Kay was horrified.  “You can’t do that!”

“Well, what did you think we were bringing him down here for?” Peggy demanded.

“To thaw him out!” said Kay.

Peggy stared at her a moment.  Kay was the one who, a moment ago, had announced she was leading the way to the boiler room.  Why was she coming here, if not to destroy Steve’s body so that it could not be used for research?  Yes, thawing would make the body harder to study, but why settle for ‘harder’ when they could have ‘impossible’?

“We agreed we would burn him!” Peggy reminded her.

“You can’t,” Kay insisted.  Her eyes flicked to the left, then the right, then met Peggy’s  “He’s still alive!”

Peggy glanced down at the cloth draped over a cold, stiff body, then back at Kay.  Her first instinct was that this woman must be joking, but this was hardly the time or place for a jape.  Besides, Kay’s expression was utterly in earnest, her eyes wide and her hands tight on Steve’s ankles as if to pull him back against her.  Could it be she actually believed it?

“You’re mad!” said Peggy.

“Trust me!” Kay pleaded.

“Step away from the body!” a man ordered.

Peggy looked up, and Kay turned to see over her shoulder.  Two soldiers were standing in the doorway with guns.  More were behind them.  There was only one way in or out of the boiler room.  Peggy and Kay were trapped.

“Put your hands were I can see them,” said the soldier.

Kay reluctantly raised hers.  Peggy began to do likewise, then decided if she were going to be shot one way or the other, she may as well earn it.  She grabbed Steve’s body and hauled it off the gurney, but its limp weight was more than she’d expected, and she couldn’t move more than a couple of inches before the men were shouting at her, ordering her to stop.  Half a dozen of them squeezed into the room to grab Kay and drag her away from the gurney.  There wasn’t space for her to fight them off.

Instead, Kay started screaming.  “Steve!” she shouted at the body Peggy was still holding onto.  “Steve!  Wake up!  Wake up!”

“Shut up!” one of the soldiers told her, trying to get a hand over her mouth.

“Steve, please!” Kay begged.

And then Peggy felt something under the cloth move.

For a moment she thought it had to be her imagination, but then Peggy saw the drop cloth actually shift.  She jerked her hands away and watched in disbelief.  The whole room went suddenly silent as the body rolled over, right off the gurney and onto the metal floor, landing in a heap with the cloth tangled in limbs.  There it lay still, and Peggy once again almost told herself there was another explanation before Steve pushed himself shakily onto his hands and knees.

“I told you!” crowed Kay.  “I told you!”

Peggy knelt down to put her hands on Steve’s cheeks.  They were cold and wet, but there was a solid elasticity to them that no dead body could have.  His blue eyes opened and met hers.

Maybe she was hallucinating.  Maybe she’d fainted from cold and anxiety while dangling from the helicopter and this was all a dream.

“Peggy?” he asked weakly.

“Steve.  Oh my god,” she breathed, and pulled him in to hold his head against her chest.  He put trembling arms around her middle and leaned into her, heavy but not limp the way he’d been when she tried to pull him off the gurney.  She could feel him shivering as his body tried to warm itself… her hand on his back could feel it rising and falling with his breathing, feel his heart starting to slow from a frantic race to a more normal rhythm.

She wasn’t dreaming.  He was alive.

“Where am I?” he rasped.

“In the boiler room of the…”  Peggy looked around.  She hadn’t gotten the name of the ship.

After a brief pause, one of the soldiers offered, “the USS Valiant.”  He lowered his gun, stood up straight, and saluted.  “Lieutenant Junior Grade Phillip Harbottle, Sir.  You saved my life at the Battle of Anzio.”

The others around him, one by one, stowed their weapons and raised their hands to their brows.  As soon as Kay was free of their grasp, she wiggled her way in between the gurney and the pipes to kneel and put a hand on Steve’s back.

“How do you feel?” she asked him.

“Terrible,” Steve admitted.  “Who are you?”

For a moment, Peggy could have sworn she saw tears rising in Kay’s eyes, but the other woman quickly regained her composure.  “Katherine Lake.  I’m a friend of Peggy’s.”

“Not exactly,” said Peggy.  Even in this incredible moment, she wasn’t willing to give her that.

“There’s backstory,” said Kay.

Peggy looked up at the soldiers, who were still gathered around watching, not sure what to do.  “So are you lot just going to stand there?” she asked.  “Or does somebody want to do something useful and find this man a doctor?”

She and Kay helped Steve back onto the gurney, and this time they were not pursued but escorted as they wheeled him into the infirmary.  The scientists and nurses the women had beaten up were already in there, having cuts sewn up and bruises iced.  A couple of these jumped to their feet when Peggy and Kay entered, whether to protest or to run it was impossible to say.

“Out of the way!” one of the soldiers ordered.  “Captain America is alive!”

The man Peggy had beaten in the head with an instrument tray stood, still holding a bag of ice against his bruised scalp.  “So you were…” he pointed at Peggy.  “Why didn’t you say so?” he asked.

“Because you would have thought we were mad,” Peggy informed him.

The man sat down again.

Doctors hurried over to start treating Steve, bringing him proper blankets and listening to his heart and lungs.  One nurse made warm compresses to put on his chest and forehead, and another boiled water to make him a hot drink.  Peggy wanted to remain by his side, but knew she would only be in the way, so she backed off to let them work.

“What’s the last thing you remember, Captain Rogers?” a doctor asked, holding Steve’s eyes open to look inside them.

“I… the cockpit filled with water from behind,” he replied.  “I think I hit my head on the window frame.”

“Can you tell me how old you are?” another said, testing his memory.

“Twenty-seven,” Steve said immediately.

That wasn’t right, Peggy thought… Steve had been born in 1918.  He’d turn thirty in July of this year.  He had no idea how long he’d been in the ice, she realized.  As far as he knew it had been only moments.  What would he think when they told him it had been almost three years?

Three years.  Long enough for the war to end, for Peggy to move on and be planning to marry somebody else.  Daniel hadn’t officially asked her yet, but that was only because they wanted to get this matter with Dottie sorted out before they scheduled a wedding and honeymoon.  Both of them were taking for granted that it would happen.  They’d talked about buying a house.  How was she going to explain that to Steve?

What was Daniel going to think when Peggy came back with a living Steve instead of a dead one?  Would he expect her to just run off with him?  She’d always told Daniel he didn’t need to compete, but that was easy enough to hear – and to say – when the man he would have been competing with was dead.  What would she…

A fuss at the door interrupted her train of thought, and alerted her to the arrival of the men in charge.  Captain Lewis came striding in and then stopped cold, unable to believe what he was seeing.

“Captain Rogers?”  A nurse held out a mug to him.  “It’s cocoa.  It’ll warm you up.”

“Thanks,” said Steve.  He accepted the drink and wrapped his hands around it, letting the warmth soak into his fingers.

Behind Captain Lewis was Masters, who was just as surprised but recovered from it faster.  He rallied and straightened up, and came forward to offer Steve his hand.

“Captain Rogers?  Vernon Masters,” he said.  “I don’t know if you remember me…”

“No, I do,” Steve replied.  His voice was less hoarse now.  He was recovering quickly, just as he had from every other injury he’d ever suffered.  “You work for the SSR.”

“I’m running for senate in New York now,” said Masters.  “It’s good to have you back, son.  We’ve missed you.”

Peggy pursed her lips.  Masters would doubtless be re-evaluating all his future plans right now, but she knew exactly what he would end up doing.  “Well, this will make your campaign, won’t it, Mr. Masters?” she asked.  “The man who brought home Captain America!  It certainly sounds better than being the man who vivisected him, doesn’t it?”

Masters frowned at her.  “You knew the whole time.”

Under the circumstances, Peggy was happy to let him think so.  “Forgive me for not saying something earlier.  Knowing you’re already suspicious of my motives, I figured you wouldn’t believe me.  Captain Lewis,” she added.  “May I use the radio?  I need to tell my friend in Resolute to go and get Howard Stark.  If I’m not to be taken back to the brig, that is.”

Lewis looked at Masters, but Masters just turned away to watch Steve drink his cocoa.

“Of course,” said Lewis.  “Radio room.  Up by the lower chart room, just below the flight deck.”

“Thank you,” said Peggy.  She returned to Steve’s bedside and bent to kiss him on the cheek.  “I’ll be right back,” she promised.

Steve caught her wrist.  “Something’s wrong, isn’t it?” he said under his breath.

“A lot of things are wrong.  I’ll explain when you’re feeling better.”  She would have to think about what she was going to say… where would she even begin?

Peggy managed to hold herself together as she climbed the stairs to the lower chart room.  Her voice even wavered only slightly as she made her call to Jason in the Skytrain at Resolute.  “This is the USS Valiant calling Ice Seeker.  Over,” she said into the microphone.

There was a clattering sound on the channel.  “Valiant, this is Ice Seeker,” said Jason’s voice.  “Peggy, are you okay?  Over.

“Yes, I’m fine,” Peggy lied.  “You need to go get Howard.  Over.”

“The Stark Industries people already brought him back an hour ago,” Jason said.  “He said the army came and took the Captain away, killed the dogs, and you and Lake took off hanging onto the helicopters.  What happened?”  There was a pause before he remembered he was on the radio.  “Over.”

“It’s a long story,” Peggy said.  “I don’t want to tell it on the air – I think somebody already overheard your message to the company.  Do you think you can meet us in Nome?”  There was an airfield there which would have to be a stepping stone on their route back to the mainland US.  Masters would want to get Steve home and on display as quickly as possible.  “Over.”

“Definitely.  I’ll let Howard know right away,” Jason promised.  “Are you sure you’re all right?”

“I’ll tell you when we arrive,” Peggy repeated.

She said goodbye and shut down the radio, and then took a deep breath.  Now she could do something with the emotions roiling inside her.  She would just have to find a private place, because no matter what had happened, Peggy Carter was not about to sit and cry where anyone could see her.

[tundrainafrica]

Title: A Tale of Two Slaves (12/17)

Summary:  “Soulmates don’t exist. Fate doesn’t exist. Everything is a choice.” At that moment, Levi could only watch as she made the choice for him.“

Reincarnation AU. Levi remembers everything from their past life. Hange doesn’t.

Other Chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Link to cross-postings: AO3

Recruitment Season.

Having been recruited himself, Levi was somewhat familiar with the timeline. Or at least he should have been familiar with it.

When he had suggested showing up for one of Mikasa’s tournaments, his end goal had been to at least get Hange out of her hole, the same way she had pulled him out of his own slump. With nothing else on his mind though leading up to the tournament, he found himself a little too surprised at the large crowd that showed up that day at the entrance of the school.

And Levi was familiar with the clipboards, the iPads and the way those particular people strode into the school with some sort of purpose.

The school so close to their largest city was much larger than the school he grew up in. Back in his old school, there were only two to five scouts at a time for at least ten different sports. There, by the entrance of Public School No. 104, the crowd was large and Levi was overwhelmed.

For a second he doubted whether or not he had read the entries on the events page right. That second became a few seconds and maybe even a minute as Levi recalled that there had been multiple events slated for that day. There was a huge possibility that he could have read it wrong.

He had thought ahead enough at least to bookmark the page on his phone. Whether or not he had thought ahead to bookmark it because of any lingering doubt or because it had been just a little too convenient to click the star on his phone was a question he quickly brushed off even before he could entertain it.

What was important then was he had something to assure him that he hadn’t been a total idiot taking Hange to that school.

If we can’t watch jumping, maybe they have diving or gymnastics or something. Levi thought to himself in that few second gap pulling the phone out of his pocket and scrolling through it.

Those were all consolations though. The grand prize was still the high jump event and he would hate himself if he had read the time wrong. The chances were small but the visit to the school had been crucial for many reasons.

For one, Hange had not gone out since her parents gave her a deadline to vacate her apartment. She hadn’t seemed completely alive since then, almost reminiscent of Levi’s own bout of isolation. She didn’t do much either to ask for help, to open up about her own turmoil.

It had been just the two of them clearing out years worth of clutter in the apartment for hours on end, which soon turned to days on end, save for those small few hours to get groceries. The silence which only further alluded to the lifelessness of the room, was deafening.

And in his own way, Levi found himself almost obliged to reignite something within her.

On top of that, Levi hadn’t written anything for three days. At first glance, that wasn’t an issue. Overtime though, with nothing much to do, with the decision to stay at home with Hange, he had started writing more, organizing thoughts on Petra, Zeke, Erwin, Farland, Isabel and he had written thousands of words, tens of pages but Levi was sure, the story was far from over.

There were glaring holes that he had dug through the deepest pits of his memories trying to fill. His documents were riddled with empty bullet points, blank spaces and sometimes even half complete sentences any other casual reader would have never made sense of.

There were inarguable truths though with what he had pieced together. Many of the people he had met had died, and he felt the raw pain with every single one of them in his dreams, only manageable by the reminder that they were all alive and were merely dead as characters in his dreams.

In his dreams and in his stories, he was a soldier. Erwin died and Hange had taken over as a commander. And somehow, they had ended up outside the walls, lying together in the forest and Levi could have sworn he didn’t want to leave.

But for what? Why?

For a time before that, he had been in the forest with that blond doctor too and Levi had hated his guts then too.

But under what context?

Keep writing and you’ll find out. Something nagged at him. But it was as if he had written everything. The dreams just replayed. The memories of familiar strangers only got more and more vivid. And the dreams he saw and the thoughts he reflected on only served to add detail to the sceneries and to the faces as Levi wrote them.

But he knew how they looked like in real life, there was no need to describe their faces any more than he already did. And what did scenery have to do with anything? From what he remembered, half of what he dreamt of was within walls anyway.

But there was a lead. Mikasa Ackerman. He remembered voices. He remembered raw care and concern. And he was sure there was still something to probe on those names. He tried describing her on paper with just the name as some sort of lead, but it proved futile.

Any description he attempted to shoehorn into his stories seemed like a lie. It felt almost idiotic and almost obsessive then and Levi was very careful with his words as he asked for directions then.

They gestured for Levi to follow and he found himself keeping a good distance from the crowd as they walked through the school grounds.

From his place behind them, he had heard the name ‘Ackerman’ mentioned a few times among the college scouts, whether they were talking about him or Mikasa, he didn’t probe. He didn’t want to know either. Watching the high jump event might be painful enough for him and he didn’t want to unnecessarily add any more salt to that wound.

“Levi, you sure this is the way to go?” Hange asked.

“That’s where the scouts are going,” Levi said.

Hange pulled out her phone. “I’ll look for a school map.”

Levi shrugged. “The school is bigger than I expected. Let’s cover some ground while you search.” He kept his eyes ahead, keeping the crowd at least in his peripherals as he scanned his surroundings.

As they walked through the main path of the school, the crowd gradually dispersed. Then for Levi who had been so religiously following the crowds since almost a minute ago, it became a game of which crowd was biggest.

Because everyone should be here for Mikasa Ackerman right? Levi thought to himself. He couldn’t wait for Hange to navigate. He pressed on, following the biggest crowd before they turned the corner and disappeared completely.

The crowd may have been for Mikasa, or it could have been for any other athlete or any other sport. He never did find out.

“Levi, I think we should turn around here… The high jump event should be---” Hange started.

“It’s Connie Springer! Connie Springer’s batting next!”

From his view along the main road, partially obscured by tall trees and bushes dotting the landscape, Levi hadn’t gotten a good view at first. And if it hadn’t been for the familiar name, maybe Levi never would have sped up, or gone as fast at least as his limp and his crutches would take him.

He turned the corner, the largest crowd forgotten. He made good distance, even on the rocky landscape that made up the smaller path.

“Levi, be careful. You might trip.” Hange asked. “Besides, where are we going? The high jump event i...”

Hange’s protests eventually faded into something unintelligible from behind him. If he had actually tried to listen, maybe he would have heard whatever else she was saying. It was as if his mind knew, anything she said was futile. He was hell bent on making that detour and he was 100% that detour which was only a few feet away, would give him enough of a satisfying answer.

We can check the venue after. Just give me this few minutes. Levi had been in enough high jump tournaments to know they lasted a fair amount of time anyway.

The smaller path opened up to a field. There were athletes on the field clad in red, one on the field clad in green. Levi had enough stock knowledge on Major League Baseball to know exactly what was happening.

The innings were all on the scoreboard, large enough for Levi to see from his angle. Visitors were leading by three points. The home team had one more out left before the game would be declared over. And out on each base was one player clad in green.

It was a decisive possession for green. Levi surmised even if it hadn’t been Connie Springer who had caught his attention then, maybe he still really would have stopped to watch.

A lot of the crowd looked like they were thinking the same thing. Even with the game almost over, people were still approaching the field.

Connie Springer…

Levi heard the whispers among the scouts. Good runner. Mediocre Batter. And maybe he had felt a little offended for Connie when someone had joked that they should just bid the regionals and nationals goodbye.

Connie was better than that. Levi was sure.

And just like Levi had thought, Connie seemed unfazed. From his position at the side of the field, Connie approached the home plate at a steady yet rapid pace, bat in hand.

The whispers around him only started to get louder as Connie got into a position to bat.

Connie was a mediocre batter and a good runner at the same time. And Connie's hand position as he held the bat was a remnant of just that. Connie held one hand behind the mid section of the bat and he gripped it as if he weren’t going to let go any time soon.

He’s gonna bunt. Levi didn’t need the whispers for that commentary. Just as expected, that was a safe play for someone deemed a ‘shitty batter’ by the cruel audience.

Connie gripped the bat and positioned it. The pitch came a second later. And in that small span of a few seconds, Levi’s expectations were subverted, and as proven by the gasps around him, it looked like the audience’s expectations were subverted as well.

Connie had taken a risk. And in the next few seconds, everyone would find out if it were a good risk. He had swung the bat all the way through, there was a clank of the ball and the ball flew. Looking at the blue and white of the sky, Levi had to squint to see it.

It was a bunt fake. Levi soon realized. But he quickly dropped that thought as he followed Connie along all the bases. He was a great runner and Levi struggled to follow him through the bases. He felt his heart thumping as he followed Connie’s path.

He could hear screams from the audience to run. And Connie was screaming much louder as he ran even after having reached the second base.

Levi was sure he could have stopped there but Connie continued to run, screaming to the others to run as well. And by the third base, Connie could have stopped, and they could have secured a tie. The coach by the third base, held his hands up high, as if to tell Connie to take those three points.

It’s a tie game, no need to. And as Levi soon found out, any efforts to move in the next few seconds would be risky. Levi followed the ball which was already making the rounds of the bases. And when he looked back to third base, he found it empty. Connie was still running.

There were angry screams and Levi wouldn’t be surprised if it was from the coach. Levi didn’t bother to look anywhere else though to check. The next few milliseconds, he dedicated to Connie who was still dashing towards the home base.

Levi’s breath caught that split second when the catcher bent over to grab the ball.

But he still has to tag Connie. The catcher made the mistake of approaching Connie on the lane connecting the bases.

Or was it a mistake? He was blocking Connie’s path. And if Connie did anything like stray away from the path it would be an out.

He kept moving, As if fortune did favor the brave, everything started working for him at once. The catcher had bent over to dash faster. Connie was only getting faster, gaining momentum with every stride.

The split second Connie launched himself in the air and over the catcher, Levi could have sworn time stopped. That pause could have lasted an eternity. Yet everything after that could have happened on fast forward. Connie fell onto the home plate and skidded violently on the field and before Levi could take a good look, Connie was surrounded.

That scene on the field reminded Levi of his own accident months ago.

Is he okay? Levi stayed longer than he should have. He knew if he had left then and there, he probably wouldn’t be able to rest without the guarantee that the young baseball player out there wouldn’t suffer the same fate Levi had.

“Levi… Did you see that?” It sounded like Hange was struggling to breathe.

But in a good way. A good way he had missed so much, he found himself distracted enough to look away from the congregation on the home base and back at Hange.”It looked like he was flying huh?” Levi asked, taking a long good look at Hange as he said those words.

Her face was flushed. The glimmer in her eyes was still there, albeit weaker. Her eyes completely concentrated on the scene in front of her, as if in a trance. And Levi was sure she was imagining, seeing herself in that same spot only a second ago.

Was that how it felt Hange? Every single time you saw someone jump?

Levi was convinced he was right. The glimmer in Hange's eyes was weaker for sure. At first, Levi had thought it to be a remnant of the events of weeks ago, with her thesis struggles, with her parent’s admonishing remarks.

Levi ended up concluding though, that it wasn’t weaker. It was just glowing differently.

There was no desire in her eyes, no childish jealousy at lost dreams she couldn’t achieve. It was as if Hange had gained the power to so purely and innocently, so easily place herself in another's shoes, when she just thinks through it.

And absence worked to make Levi notice it more but in that new glow, that new glimmer in her eyes, Levi noticed then, there was no subtle hint of guilt at having indulged in such a trivial and useless passion her whole life.

Yet every single time he had snuck glances at Hange watching jumps before that, there was guilt in her eyes. As if she was supposed to be doing something more important: studying, working, succeeding, meeting expectations.

Is that how liberation feels? Levi asked himself then. He wanted to ask her that same thing then but he found another question, a follow up question which popped so quickly into his mind even before he had completely articulated the first one. Does she know yet that she’s free?

Maybe she didn’t. Because it had just come so naturally for someone like her.

“I wrote her like that because that’s how Hange Zoe really is.”

“Then I’ll work harder to be like her.”

“You don’t have to. The squad leader and the commander are already in you, you just have to uncover for yourself those parts.”

And she had figured it out for herself in the easiest of states, in a trance borne of passion, ecstasy, excitement and maybe euphoria.

An authentic, unrehearsed and organic smile, from Hange of all people, had left Levi with too many emotions to wrangle with: nostalgia, relief, excitement and everything in between. Too many for him to figure out for itself. Yet, it manifested in that moment, as Levi stood frozen next to her, staring at her for god knows how long. As if that Hange Zoe was something he had lost so long ago, maybe even centuries or even millennia ago. And he could have stood there forever as long she remained in that state of pure organic euphoria.

Hange’s lips widened, then curled up into a smile. “He’s okay!” She screamed, much louder than what could have been appropriate for that situation, for someone who barely even knew the guy on the field.

Levi didn’t mind though. In another story, maybe in another life, Connie was a member of their legion after all.

Hange’s outburst was a done deal and there was nothing much they could do about the eyes focused on them or the whispers among the crowd. Levi took advantage of that sunk cost, he approached Connie who was sitting alone on his bench, taking a quick drink of water.

“You did great out there.” It came out as barely a whisper and as Levi soon realized, he was still too far for Connie to have heard it. And the latter didn’t.

That whisper had completely and so easily been overshadowed by calls from his own teammates to hurry up and pack his things. Connie’s team was going to regionals.

And maybe after that, nationals. It would have been nice to send some sort of congratulations then. Reality took over and brought with it reasonable arguments, all against some sort of odd and almost stalkery approach towards Connie.

Their team would be celebrating that night. Connie was far gone and had disappeared among the crowd of red baseball uniforms. It would be an odd and completely unjustifiable effort to chase Connie down then.

“Congratulations,” Levi whispered to himself.

“Congratulations to...? The home team?” Hange asked, stepping up beside him.

“Yeah, I would have wanted to talk to them. Congratulate them myself.”

“I’m sure they heard you,” Hange said.

The murmurs among the crowd, the praises, the cries and the dissemination of rumors were ubiquitous and they were still far from dead, even as the crowds started to disperse. Behind it all, Levi heard the rustle of trees and the whistling of the winds.

And maybe the wind could carry messages for him. Just in case, Levi did whisper other words of greeting, much softer than what Hange would have heard beside him. They were generic words of congratulations and well wishes but Levi swore they were heartfelt.

And he ended it with one last personalized message. I hope we could meet again and maybe have a little more time to talk.

Hange’s voice broke through his little correspondence. “Hey Levi, we still have an hour or so before the high jump event. What about if we try other events on the way?”

Levi shrugged. “Why not? We’re here already.” The trip had proven to be filled with surprises already.

*******

"Levi, you shouldn't have gone to the toilet. You missed some amazing jumps. There's this girl…. Sasha Braus I think…"

“Sasha Braus?” Levi made sure to say her name slowly, to at least imply some unfamiliarity.

But he was all too familiar with that name already. In fact, that hadn't been a toilet break, Levi had gone to the cafeteria only a building away and bought some plastic wrapped melon bread. Just in case there would be an opportunity to talk.

"How many jumps did I miss?" Levi asked.

"Five or six but we missed the start of the competition already so I think we missed more than that. They said this was the last round… But Sasha's already winning by a lot."

"Just as expected."

"So you know Sasha?"

"I follow athletes too you know."

"But diving?"

"Maybe." Levi kept his reply short, unwilling to keep that joke of a charade any longer.

Hange had a knowing look on her face as if she never did believe him.

Levi returned Hange with a playful look of his own as if to say:

But how else would I know her name?

Hange probably suspected the recognition to have been the result of a series of deductions. But Levi wasn't that smart.

After that encounter with Connie, the names and faces just came to him much faster than ever. Even among the five athletes lined up in front of the pull, Levi could spot her from meters away, last in line

He checked the watch on his phone, thirty minutes until the high jump event. They had enough time to kill.

In the few minutes leading up to Sasha's final dive, Levi made sure to search her name.

Top diver. Top seed for college scouts. High level of diving technique.

Diving wasn't a particularly popular sport where they lived but it was enough to make waves at least on the internet.

When Levi started to watch the women dive into the water, performing tucks, pikes and twists along the way, he did wonder why it never was popular.

And with the way, Hange was looking at them, he suspected she thought the same thing.

"Let's go Sasha!" Hange's voice rang out in the indoor pool area.

Do we know her? Levi asked. Realistically, do we know her? He amended that soon after. He knew her. But was he supposed to know her. Was Hange supposed to know her?

He wasn't too self conscious either. She wasn't the only one who was cheering after all. He could have sworn the blonde in front of them was cheering just as hard.

"Was I too loud?" Hange whispered, a second later. "I think I got too excited."

"No, that's very much a Hänge Zoe move," Levi said.

That small shadow of self consciousness in Hange's voice completely dissipated and Levi was relieved to see that gentle yet excited smile that followed.

And it could have been a hint or an illusion, but as Levi looked back at the brunette who approached the edge of the diving board, he could have sworn she had given them a flicker of a gaze as she positioned herself on the edge.

She may have heard Hange's cheers. Levi wondered though, if she had heard any more of their cheers or if she had recognized them.

Levi leaned towards a 'no.' though having been disappointed a little too many times. And he considered it a done deal as she executed a difficult twist, a pike then dove into the water head first.

"The high jump is starting in ten minutes. We should go," Hänge said, glancing at her watch.

The melon bread in the inner pocket of Levi's jacket protested. He had bought it for her after all.

He had other options at least. "Psst…" Levi called the attention of the blonde in front of him.

She didn't look back.

"Historia," Levi said. He decided for himself then that it was worth the risk.

The blonde looked back at them, her eyes wide open in confusion. "I'm sorry… I don't think I recognize you…" It was just like her to still be polite to a couple of potentially creepy strangers.

"No need to recognize me," Levi said. He pressed the melon pan, into the hand that Historia had held out for a hand shake. "Get this to Sasha for us. Tell her it's from her fans."

With that, the two stepped down from their place in the second row bleachers and quickly and silently slipped out through the entrance.

*******

“Maybe we have the time for one more detour,” Levi said.

“We’re still on the way to the high jump venue. And it’s not like we’re gonna miss everything if we’re ten minutes late,” Hange added.

As they stood at the entrance of the gym along the main road, they were distracted for different reasons. Levi was distracted because he had heard that one name among the cheers loud enough to hear even beyond closed doors. Hange though looked like she had managed to at least get a glimpse of what was going on inside through the transparent glass of the door.

“Should we… go in?” Levi asked.

“You wanna? There’s only a few seconds left.”

“Why not?”

Even with both of them in a silent agreement, they still hesitated. The door opened towards the inside and from what Levi could see with a slight tiptoe, even the door was barricaded. As Levi took a closer look at Hange, he realized that that could have been one of the reasons she was hesitant to go in.

“I saw this pretty cool dunk through this window. I wish you could have seen it.”

“I’ve seen a lot of cool things today already.”

“Yeah, but a few more cool things wouldn’t hurt.”

“It’s okay, I’ll just look at them on Youtube after. You got a name?”

“I’m checking his jersey… The name is too far… Can’t see it from this shitty view. It starts with a K… And it looks like a really long name.”

“Kirstein?”

“Can’t tell…But that doesn’t sound like a long name.”

The buzzer rang loud enough that even Levi found himself jumping at the sound. Cheers followed which Levi had to admit, had been a worse ordeal for his ears than the buzzer of a while ago.

But maybe the wait will be worth it. Levi told himself and he willed himself to be patient. “Let’s wait by the side of the door. People are gonna be going out soon.”

“I wish we could have been earlier. I would have wanted to see more dunks.” Hange whined. “You know I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone dunk in real life until now.”

“Well, maybe one day I’ll take you to watch a basketball game live,” Levi said as he leaned on the wall to the side of the gym.

“The tickets are expensive.”

“Aren’t your parent’s filthy rich?”

“Well, they thought games were a waste of time…”

“After we graduate, then we get jobs, maybe we can watch together.”

“That would be nice.” Hange leaned on the wall right next to him. Leaning her head back, she looked to Levi and gave him a playful smile. “Then after that, we can go watch some Major League Baseball and some diving tournaments too.”

It was only then Levi realized he had leaned his head back in the same manner. The way she had mimicked it had been comforting and he found himself following suit. “Maybe we can watch a gymnastics competition or a skating competition?”

“And maybe when we earn more money… Let’s watch the olympics together.”

Levi smiled. “That’s the dream.” He looked at the sky above him, avoiding Hange’s gaze. With the price of the tickets and the distance of the venues though, Levi was aware that it was a distant dream.

But something inside him nagged.

Two months ago, actually making the olympics wouldn’t have been such a distant dream. His coach had talked about the Olympics many times before already, talking about scouts, about post graduation training with the national team. He wondered how pathetic he was at that moment, shifting from dreaming to make the Olympics to dreaming of just watching. It was a short episode of melancholy and maybe if Levi had indulged it, it would have lasted longer.

It was something he willed himself not to show Hange though and instead, he stared up at the sky, willing himself instead to silently admire the view. From his peripherals, he was relieved to see Hange had done similarly.

Noon had shifted to afternoon so subtly. Looking straight up at the light blue, didn’t hurt so much anymore and he suspected it was late afternoon already. He knew they should be leaving soon if they wanted to catch Mikasa’s tournament.

The melancholy weighed on him. As if Hange understood though, she was silent and she didn’t pressure him to move just yet. Levi slid back down on the ground, letting the crutches fall in front of him.

“You okay?” Hange asked, sliding down to a sitting position next to him.

No, I’m not. Levi would have answered. When he looked at Hange though, he saw understanding, as if she knew what would have only been the correct answer to that. But you aren’t okay either. Levi had to note, so it would have only served to stoke the fires of her own vulnerability to admit his own. So he went for a kind in-between.

“I know we’re both not okay. We just have to ride through this until shit gets better,” Levi said, giving Hange the best authentic smile he could muster which felt like more of a lopsided grin in the end.

Hange took a deep breath. “Yeah, maybe you’re right.” She returned that smile with her own and Levi was certain her own smile had been a better rendition of what he had.

“Jean! Hey! Come back here.”

Levi had done a pretty good job of tuning out the crowds that had been exiting the gym since a while ago. When he looked back to the entrance to see Jean and an unrecognizable teammate just outside, he was almost surprised to see their surroundings almost completely empty, especially when compared to a while ago.

“You can’t just leave. Coach will kill us.”

“I said, I’ll follow. It’s just a celebratory dinner. It’s not like we’ll lose our ticket to regionals if I don’t go.”

“But you scored the winning dunk.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” Jean asked. “Besides I am going. I’ll just be late.”

The player next to Jean cleared his throat. “Is this about her?”

“Yes. I wanna watch her jump. Is that so bad?”

“Mikasa’s gonna have other tournaments you know.”

“But we’re going to be busy with regionals. Who knows how many times I’ll be able to catch her tournaments before graduation.”

There was an awkward silence between them and Levi was almost tempted to use that moment to approach Jean. Even with some support from Hange though, it had taken Levi more than enough time to push himself to a standing position.

“God you’re such a simp Jean.”

“Cover for me Caleb.”

Caleb walked back into the gym and Jean started to jog, making his way for the main path. Levi was sure with his current state he wouldn’t be able to catch up. It was as if Hange though had read his mind.

“Excuse me!”

Levi followed at a much slower pace, only able to catch up because the two had slowed to a stop in the middle of the main path.

“Mikasa Ackerman? Yes! She’s my classmate.”

Levi noted the light blush on Jean’s face as he spoke. “We wanna watch the tournament too,” Levi added, slowing to a stop beside Hange. “Could we walk there together? This is our first time here so we might get lost.” A partial lie. It wasn’t their first time but they had looked at the map on their phone enough times to have sworn on their life that the path they were taking was correct.

Jean had looked surprised at first, but his dumb expression had quickly shifted to something much friendlier. “I’d be happy to take you two there.” He held out his hand. “Jean Kirstein.”

Hange had been the first to take his hand in a friendly gesture. “Hange Zoe.”

The pleasantries were quickly forgotten and their conversation had shifted to other things. Along the way, Levi had stopped listening as it shifted to conversations on air time and agility exercises.

Just like Hange to want to talk about that. Levi thought. That was the thesis she had wanted to do after all.

Levi allowed himself to trail behind a bit, letting the two grab a bit more distance.

That gave him a good view of the two, side by side. And they have been side by side before, Levi recalled that much. They had discussed strategies, paperwork, war conditions many times before.

Levi took advantage of that distance between them. To further indulge that little picture of a memory, Levi whispered two names under his breath. Commander Hange Zoe and Commanding Officer Jean Kirstein.

That at least added some realism to the view. And Levi was sure he’d remember enough to write pages worth when he got home.

*******

“Looks like we haven’t missed a lot,” Hange said.

“You missed the first few heights but those were too easy. I wouldn’t be surprised if Mikasa sat it out.” Levi commented. He looked to Jean who was gesturing for them to follow as he climbed up the bleachers.

And he kept his focus on Jean the whole way up. The high jump event was his domain and although he had hoped to keep a low profile during the event, a part of him knew that it would be almost impossible. Although his face could be almost forgettable and maybe unnoticeable in the crowds, the crutches only made people stare. And when people stare, they have a tendency to look at faces. And when they look at faces they recognize, sometimes they talk.

Levi had learned that lesson so many times before already. At least though, with every lesson learned, he had gotten better at brushing off the whispers. On top of the quick introductions, the familiar faces on the bleachers had been a very helpful distraction as well, one unbothered and the other, the complete opposite, a little too curious about everything.

Eren and Armin.

“You’re late Jean. Weren’t you the one who so excitedly told Mikasa you’d show up to cheer her on?” Eren asked.

“Hey, I’m here right now. Besides, I knew you and Armin were going to show up anyway. You always do.” Jean said, raising his hands defensively. He looked back at the field as if searching for her among the athletes. “So when is she jumping?”

“She got eliminated.”

Jean buried his face in his hands. “You’re kidding.”

“Eren, she sat out the easier heights right?” Levi had to note that at first glance, it did look like Mikasa wasn’t there. He suspected that the bench where Mikasa was sitting was just a little obscured from their view on the bleachers. He had done similarly too often for it to be anything but routine.

“Oh, you’re familiar with how high jump events work. Better than horseface here,” Eren gave the still recovering Jean a side glance before looking back at Levi. Eren’s unbothered face was far from menacing.

With his own store on his side and his own thoughts, Levi found himself still a little too careful. “I’m a little familiar...” Levi said, letting his voice trail off as he looked back out at the field.

“Excuse me.” Someone spoke up from behind him.

Levi was quick to look back. Compared to Hange who was already so engrossed on the happenings on the field just below, Levi was far from entertained. The heights were still much lower than what he would have considered entertaining.

It was Armin who had called out to him. “Are you Levi Ackerman?” He asked. The blonde seemed so unsure of himself that Levi had half the mind to deny it there just to play with him for a while. Didn’t Jean introduce us already?

“Why do you ask?”

Armin put a hand at the back of his head and flashed a sheepish grin. “Well, ever since Mikasa got into high jumping, I started to get a little more familiar with the high jumping scene. Also Eren, didn’t your brother talk about him?”

Zeke Jaeger.

“He mentioned that Levi Ackerman was injured, probably sidelined for life…” Eren trailed off, he looked pointedly at Levi’s casted knee. “Is that it?”

“So you are Levi Ackerman…” Armin said, a little more certainty in his tone.

“Wait, who’s this Levi Ackerman? Are you related to Mikasa?”

Levi shrugged. He didn’t know the best way to answer it either. Do I say distant relatives? He opted for a safe yet vague. “Maybe.”

The three boys didn’t ask anymore. The crowds exploded into cheers, and in their own little corner, the five of them fell silent as Mikasa made her way to the center and approached the starting line of the runway.

Levi quickly estimated the bar to be at 1.8 meters, too high for most high school students. So high that only two had cleared the height. And if Mikasa cleared it, that meant three people would be moving on to the 1.9 meter bar.

Or when Mikasa clears it. Levi corrected himself a second later as he watched Mikasa run to the take off box.

The crowd cheered as she landed. It had done little though to pull Levi back to reality. The cheers were merely fading background music as Levi replayed that jump in his mind. Everything from the run to the take off to the landing, everything from the smallest twist mid air had been seamless and Levi only noticed a second later his mouth had been wide open.

Mikasa wasn’t the tallest among the jumpers either, as if she relied as well on her own flexibility to get her through the bar.

“Levi, that’s how you used to jump,” Hange said. That had been enough at least to pull Levi out of his trance. “Now do you get how it felt to see you jump?”

Levi didn’t answer instantly. His first instinct had been to look back at the Youtube videos and the Instagram videos of himself Hange had shared to him a while back. He couldn’t have jumped like MIkasa. Back when he had watched his own videos, he never felt the goosebumps, or his hair stand up, or that sudden need to drop his jaw and leave his mouth wide open for a good few seconds.

But his view of Mikasa had been organic, it had been an experience, unmarred by camera angles, commentaries and video edits. Real life didn’t have video edits, and with his own first hand experience, he had the freedom and the convenience to continue to follow Mikasa, long after her jump was over.

He ignored the next two who had failed at the 1.9 meter height, completely eliminated. He had only surmised their own fate from the less than enthusiastic cheers from the crowd that followed each attempt. He continued to follow Mikasa, all the way until her second jump, focusing on the way her body curved so easily above the bar, the way her body twisted into a more comfortable angle mid flight.

As if she’s been flying her whole life.

“Ladies and gentlemen! We have a champion! Mikasa Ackerman!” The announcer chimed. But they weren’t cleaning up yet.

“There’s one more event: the men’s event, then after that the awarding,” Armin explained.

Levi shifted his attention once again to Mikasa who was making her way away from the center.

Towards the audience. Towards the front row. Levi followed Mikasa s gaze, to see a familiar back profile at the front row. The man only stood up from his seat, making the situation all the clearer for Levi.

“Coach Greg is here?” Of course, he’d be here. He’s recruiting.

He didn’t look like he was successful at recruiting though. From his spot towards the middle of the bleachers, Levi could see the way Mikasa shook her head, the way she had given the most apologetic smile and the way she walked back to the bench where her other teammates were, looking completely unbothered by that rejection.

He’s recruiting Mikasa? Levi thought.

In reply, Coach Greg looked back at the bleachers. He caught Levi’s gaze almost instantly as if he had known Levi would have been there the whole time. Levi had trained with him enough to know what he wanted just by the expression on his face.

“Levi, where are you going? The men’s jump event is about to start.”

It had been months since he trained with him, but years of old habits were still hard to break. Before Levi even noticed it himself, he had scrambled onto his feet and maneuvered through the crowd in the bleachers.

*******

“I saw you enter the venue mid match. Honestly happy to see you watching tournaments again and I’m sure a lot of the fans are happy to see you too.”

If by happy, you mean gossiping. “Jumping is hard to completely give up,” Levi replied.

The two had settled on a bench, only a few meters away from the emptiest bleachers. The screams and cheers were still audible and sometimes, comprehensible. But there was still enough peace and quiet to manage a fair conversation.

“How’s your knee?”

“I’m sure you’ve talked to Erwin about it already.”

Greg grinned sheepishly at it. He dropped his shoulders with a sigh. “I was hoping he would have given you a better prognosis. He told me you were gone from jumping for good… I just thought…”

“My last season is over. You’re already preparing for regionals and I can still barely walk,” Levi said as he gave a pointed look at the crutches he leaned on the side of the bench.

“With physical therapy…”

“I can barely walk right now because of physical therapy. We were going too fast.”

“So anything after college might be impossible huh?”

“I’m taking this one step at a time. It was a painful experience. And with the extent of it, Erwin had told me multiple times even post surgery, it might never return to pre injury state. With the competitiveness of the high jumping scene… my height… I feel like these were all just signs to just move on from it all.”

Greg dropped his shoulders and shook his head. “You were something else though. I didn’t think someone of your height could have dominated the high jump. It was like your body knew the exact moments to get you through the bar every time. As if it was completely used to being mid air.”

“Maybe my body is just used to flying,” Levi said. “Maybe I was born and built for these types of sports. But I'm sure you're aware, no matter how inclined someone is to sports, careers don’t last forever. We all have expiry dates. And mine was just a lot earlier than others.”

“But you could have made the Olympics with your numbers.”

“But the accident happened and I don’t think I’ll ever achieve those numbers again,” Levi said matter-of-factly, so realistically it hurt even when Levi was sure he had long gotten over it.

“So, what are you focusing on now?” Greg asked, an attempt at digression.

“Studies, submitting my thesis, passing my last few classes…”

“Maybe when studies die down a bit, you can visit every now and then. After winter break is over, maybe you could even help get the new recruits up to speed.”

Levi raised one eyebrow at Greg. “You have one in mind?” Mikasa Ackerman?

“Mikasa Ackerman.” As if Greg had read his mind, he had repeated those same exact words with the exact same tone Levi had heard it in his head. “Are you two related?” he asked.

“Maybe.”

“With the way you’re saying that, I'm guessing not close enough to talk to her.”

“Talk to her about what?” Levi asked.

“About considering Paradis University. She has that type of talent that only comes once every five years.”

“But if she’s committed to another university…”

“She’s not. In fact, she told me herself, she might not even go to university.”

“Why not?”

“She told me there was someone she didn’t wanna leave behind. You think you might know something about that?”

An all too familiar turn of events. Levi’s answer to his coach’s question had been a resounding yes. But he wasn’t telling him about that yet. ‘I’ll try to talk to her. Then I’ll see what I can do.”

The conversation ended soon after that with a quick promise to keep in touch. His coach hurriedly got back to the tournament and Levi found himself alone on the bench once again.

His knees ached, his arms were stiff from all the walking. And he decided for himself that a men’s jump event would not be worth the struggle of hobbling back to the bleachers.

*******

“There you are!”

Levi only had a few minutes of peace and quiet before it was interrupted by the familiar brunette who settled next to him on the bench. It had interrupted whatever trance he had gotten himself into. Either way, it was still a welcome sight. “You’re not watching?”

“I thought you went to the toilet or something but when you didn’t come back… I kinda realized you might have left because you didn’t wanna watch so I got worried. You wanna go back home?”

“I’m tired. So honestly, yes.” Levi shrugged his shoulders and did some test stretches. His body was aching from having maneuvered in crutches the whole afternoon. He could have sworn, he had reached well more than a thousand steps just walking the university, enough to expect an admonishing stare from either Erwin or his physical therapist.

“Well, we should be going back. We have to do some last minute packing since tomorrow is our last day.”

“Wait, before we leave. I was hoping to get some lead on Mikasa. I wanted to talk to her. Maybe after final exams or something.”

Hange gave him a cheeky grin. She held out her phone in an exaggerated manner. “That’s done already.”

“You got their contact details?”

“I had a pretty pleasant conversation with Armin, Jean and Eren, enough at least to get them to wanna keep in touch.”

“Keep in touch about what?”

“Thesis maybe? Future career prospects?”

“You’re meeting with a bunch of high school students?”

“Armin applied to Paradis University so there’s a lot to talk about and he said he could help out with my thesis. Besides, weren’t you the one who said you wanted to talk to Mikasa?”

“I’m doing my coach a favor.” Levi said, emphasizing those last words a little too much, he started to feel a little ridiculous a second later.

Hange raised one eyebrow in disbelief, only making Levi further regret attempting such a ridiculous lie. A smile played at Hange’s lips. “You know, I’m glad to see you’re reconnecting with your team again.”

Levi returned that smile with his own. “Well, I’m glad to see you’re reconnecting with your thesis again.”

*******

“I talked to the dorm. Scholars can get a good bed space for a cheap price, or maybe even free. You just have to sort out the paperwork, get some paperwork signed by your professor then the scholarship office. After that, we wait for approval. So, in the meantime, you could stay in a motel or something.``

“That’s the plan,” Hange said, her tone a mixture of despondence and exhaustion. Not too surprisingly, she was lugging boxes, lining them towards the entrance of the room as they spoke. “My parents are gonna pick up a lot of these boxes, probably put them in storage back home. And this…” Hange drops a purple suitcase in front of him. “Is all I’m bringing.”

“You’re serious about this huh?”

“Were you doubting it?”

Levi sat and stared at the luggage, his expression unchanging. “This just seems like a huge change.”

“This happens with everyone else anyway. I’m a senior in college. I’ll find a job, take out a loan then rent some cheap studio apartment just outside the city.”

“Studio apartments aren’t cheap, even if they are outside the city. Would you be able to afford that with the entry level income of one person?” Somehow, a part of Levi was still hoping Hange would make amends with her parents. Despite her having proven multiple times she was sure with her decision. She seemed happier then, more confident, more free. But at what cost?

“Then I’ll get a roommate,” Hange said.

“That’s a reasonable plan.” Levi said. “Well first things first. Fix those dorm papers, finish your thesis.”

“Thanks for the help Levi. Really, it means a lot.” From the firm determination of a while ago, Hange’s gaze softened to something else, something Levi had sworn he had only seen long ago, in another lifetime.

“You’ve done a lot for me too,” Levi said.

“You won’t be much help now since I’ll just be lugging boxes so feel free to just write or something until we’re ready to leave. Or you know, you could go ahead to your dorm. I’ll just contact you if I need to.”

“No, I’d rather stay.” Levi looked back at his laptop and opened his document. He had written a few words the night before as soon as they had arrived home.

Armin Arlert. Jean Kirstein. Eren Jaeger. Mikasa Ackerman. Connie Springer. Sasha Braus. Historia Reiss. The names had worked magic on the draft. With the names where they needed them to be, the story became more vivid than he had expected. He lost count of the amount of words he had written the night before, but he was sure he had added at least five pages.

And his head throbbed at that moment as he scanned through the file, reminding him of how much sleep he had sacrificed to get it written. At the least, he had managed to understand what had gotten them to the point in the woods, he understood why it had been he and Hange of all people who stuck together.

They cared about the younger soldiers for sure. But they had been the only two veterans remaining.

And what did you ask me back then? Levi asked silently as he watched Hange move the boxes one by one, lining them along walls from one corner all the way until the entrance.

Hange looked as if she were in a trance. But if their eyes had met at that moment as he thought of the question, would she have read his face, would she have known what he was asking then? Probably not. But Hange was perceptive and she had made some good guesses on his thoughts a few times already.

Maybe we should just live here together? Right, Levi? Levi wrote those words, somewhere at the bottom of the page, under descriptions of trees, stars and a glowing campfire. He wrote under it descriptions of the pain of fresh stitches, half opened wounds and the beginnings of a fever.

“You know, Hange. There was a war. This anti military faction took over, and we ran away to the woods and ----”

“Don’t tell me!” Hange interrupted. She dropped one box on to the wall, much harder than usual. “I haven’t reached that part. I wanna enjoy your story.”

“Sorry.”

Hange approached him and sat next to him on the wall by the window. Her voice was much softer as she spoke up again. “No need to apologize. I just wanna be in the best mood when I read it. Maybe I’ll catch up after final exams before winter break,” Hange said. “Besides last time I checked all you had were unfinished sentences and bullet points.”

“It’ll be finished way before then.” Even as he spoke, he was typing and Levi found himself marveling at his own ability to keep two conversations at once.

“Really? Don’t you have studies to deal with?”

“I know how it’s gonna end already.”

Hange gave a hum of approval. “Then I’ll hold your word to it. I look forward to reading it then.”

If we keep running and hiding, what will that get us… I know you’re not able to stay out of the action.

Levi had ended up writing those last few lines to the disturbed rhythm of the thumps as boxes were dropped one on top of the other.

Yeah. That’s right. I can’t. He capped off that final paragraph with Hange’s one final response. Even fully wide awake with the afternoon sun illuminating the well ventilated condominium, even with the sound of the traffic down below only made louder by the windows left open, Levi still saw her, so vividly as if she were a dream. He memorized her face then, everything from the way her brow knitted, her forehead puckered. The way her glossy eyes showed nothing but a faded glimmer.

Yet it was a glimmer and in that, Levi saw desire. A desire for something else.

And then what happened? It couldn’t have ended there. He had filled in many of the gaps himself already. He had already found the missing pieces and pushed them into place. The story had ended so anticlimactically though and Levi found himself scraping the recesses of his mind for anything he may have missed, a futile attempt.

And maybe it was futile because Hange had interrupted him a second later. She had his two plump overnight bags slung over her one shoulder. She turned her chin slightly towards the entrance. “Let’s go.”

Levi pulled himself up from the window sill. “Give me one of my bags. You shouldn’t be carrying all that.”

“You shouldn’t be carrying all this,” Hange argued, looking pointedly at his leg. “Let’s go.” She went ahead, not looking back. Along the way, she had stopped, gesturing for Levi to make the distance towards the door and out into the hallway.

Levi looked back at her to see she was still standing at the entrance leaning on the door frame, leaving one hand on the open door swung inward. She made no movement, no explicit intention to leave just yet. He felt no need to hurry her either. Moving out was no easy task after all.

“I know you don’t like messes Levi ” Hange spoke up, her voice once again the lifeless drawl that never failed to hurt Levi even a bit.

“Really?” It was obvious, Levi had acknowledged that he had hated it. But he never remembered explicitly telling Hange about it. He was lodging in her place for free after all.

“You wrinkle your nose every time I leave something lying around. And you don’t think I noticed the way things magically cleaned themselves while I was away?”

“If you don’t want to, I won’t. I’m sorry about that.”

“No, I appreciate it. I think you did a lot of good for my space. Honestly, I’m more sorry that I couldn’t provide you anything cleaner…” Hange trailed off. It seemed like she was ready to say more. She looked back at him and took a deep breath, opened her mouth but stopped herself midway. ”And for a while I was a bit self conscious about it but I think I get it now.”

“Get what?

“I get now why I like messes and clutter. And I guess I just wanna point it out now, so maybe you’d understand?” Hange moved away from the doorway and out into the hallway. “Look, it’s clean.”

It was easy for Levi to put the scene of her condominium from a few months ago and the scene in front of him side by side in his mind. There were too many things he could have pointed out at once though. The room in front of him then, was much larger and more spacious than Levi could have ever imagined, especially with the boxes all lined up towards the wall. It was immaculate, any other day he could have used the picture of the room as a blank slate, something to calm him in between stressful situations.

But side by side with the room from weeks ago, hell back to the room months ago before he had started to stain it with his own brand of cleanliness, Levi wasn’t thinking of words like clean or immaculate.

It feels lifeless. But he wasn’t telling her that. Not just yet, when the fastidious side of him was still trying to process such an opinion borne out of his cleanliness-loving mind.

It was as if Hange was giving him no time to process though. “Do you get it though? Why I like my rooms with a little clutter?”

Levi gave up on processing, instead submitting to whatever tirade was coming out of Hange then.

And she was getting a little more emotional and a little more attached as she spoke. Because when everything's scattered everywhere, I always feel like I’ll have to fix it soon right? And when I have to fix it, I’m reminded that I’ll be coming back. But now…”

Levi jumped at the crack in her voice. He went forward and closed it, and it had felt like ripping off a band-aid. “Let’s go Hange.”

“I don’t have anything to return to now. It’s gonna be dorm and motel hopping until I get a job and can afford to find a new place,” Hange continued.

The two walked towards the elevators. Hange had kept her strides so slow and steady it had been a little too easy for Levi to catch up. With that, he had a little more time and space to reflect, come up with something more comforting than ripping of a band aid.

That part was easy at least. “You don’t have to have anywhere to return to.” Levi spoke up. “I think, what’s important is that people have someone to return to...”

“‘Someones’ like that are hard to find.” Hange looked at him. Then, Levi had a good view of her, her eyes glistened with what looked like unshed tears, the lines under eyes only told of pent up exhaustion, an all too familiar expression, almost a reflection of Hange that night in the woods.

It had been too easy to assume he had heard those same words as she looked at him expectantly then.

Maybe we should just live here together? Right, Levi?

But that wasn’t the time for a yes nor was it a time to echo the invitation or the words she had mentioned right there in the forest. It wasn’t a time either to tell Hange what had happened in the woods many a lifetime before.

But Levi still spoke up, his own reply tweaked for that situation alone. If he had been any more aware, any more hesitant, he would have pulled back, discouraged already by the many other arguments his mind was able to conjure.

She doesn’t remember about that time in the woods.

She’ll think you’re crazy.

Aren’t you comfortable with where you are already?

He clocked it then as a risk. A risk he was still very much willing to take. It came out of him as something spontaneous, as an explosion inside him raring to go out despite all the doubts glomping down on him.

It had been powered by something, that was for sure. But was it frustration? Regret?

“You know Hange, if you don't want me to, I won't leave. I’d gladly stay here by your side. ”

He didn’t think too much of the motivation though, what mattered was that it did come out. And in its own way, it had left him a little lighter, and maybe a little relieved.

*******

“So what happened after?” Shela asked soon after she had scrawled another few words on her clipboard.

Levi shrugged. “That’s it. That’s how the story ended.”

“Really? With a half confession in the woods? You didn’t even say yes.”

Levi had spent the past week since they moved out of the condominium trying to write in between fixing paper work for Hange’s move to the dorm, cramming school assignments and studying for finals that was looming in the month ahead. He would have loved to blame his inability to write on his shitty schedule.

But I had more than enough time to write. He had at least an hour a night to write before bed. On good days, that had been more than enough to get something written.

“Is school getting busy? Physical therapy?”

“No.”

“Then why can’t you write a more satisfying ending.”

“That’s how it ended.”

“With a half baked confession?”

“Captain Levi was suffering from wounds after an explosion. It’s a miracle he even lasted that long.”

“So you think he died?”

“Maybe.”

Shela looked out the window, her expression unreadable. “What if you two did run away to the forest?”

“That would have been a nice ending.”

“Then why not make that the ending?”

“Because that didn’t happen.”

Shela shook her head in disbelief. “This doesn’t seem believable to me. Please try to continue writing.” She turned his laptop back to him and Levi found himself blankly staring at the open google document.

And the more he stared, feeling Shela’s observing eyes boring into him as he did, the more he realized how ridiculous that last sentence was.

I know you’re not able to stay out of the action.

It sounded like the awkward dialogue that preceded a horribly placed commercial break or ad, something Levi would have scoffed at as any other viewer or reader.

“But it’s not like I’m sharing this to anyone else,” Levi said.

“You’re sharing it to me and I’m not satisfied. There should be more to this.”

Levi looked up at Shela and back at the document a few times before deciding on his next plan of action. Shela’s glare was uncompromising and she didn’t look like she would take no for an answer. The document in front of him though, that tiny blinking cursor on the screen was calling to him, the bottom part of the page was blank.

And maybe there was something, albeit little, that can be done flogging a horse that was just almost dead. There were still a few more lines of dialogue that made its way to the pages and Levi was surprised he had enough of that clearly etched in his mind for it to so easily flow into the pages in front of him.

Shoot or listen. It’s up to you.

The last few lines had all been dialogue. But as he turned the laptop back to Shela, the latter seemed at least willing to accept that. “This still looks a little too abrupt...” she commented “ You sure this is how it ends?”

“Captain Levi could have gotten shot. Maybe he died.”

Shela dropped her shoulders in defeat. “Progress is still progress. Do me a favor and please think long and hard about what happens next.”

“I really think it ended with the conversation in the forest.” Levi turned the laptop back to himself, closed the window and shut down his laptop. “But I can try to get something else written out… Maybe a few more scenes?”

“Don’t try." Shela gave Levi a knowing look. “I want you to do it.”

And that look bore holes into him, Levi could have sworn she was a mind reader with the way she followed the laptop with her eyes as he placed it back into his bag. He wouldn’t have been too surprised if she could tell the contents just by looking through the hardware.

Levi had to admit though, what Shela was suspecting, was right. There was more to the story and these scenes nagged at him from the deepest pits of his mind, pleading for their own time to let loose.

They were terrifying though. They were unsettling and Levi was in no position to entertain them.

Not just yet.

Or maybe he never would. Maybe he would be happy never entertaining them again.

So maybe captain Levi died? Maybe they ran away in the woods? There were questions that had been echoed by Shela, questions that had been so easily answered by dreams that he had forced himself to forget soon after he woke up.

The complex emotions though, were very much answerable with a simple question, a simple explanation that Levi was in no obligation to expound on.

“But… Endings don’t have to be satisfying right? What if I just don’t wanna write anymore?”