#I hope this is what you meant by 'rules'!

[lokirulesmidgard]

I rubbed my eyes as I looked up from the page. I'd made sure to record these ominous words the day I released that beautiful bird back to its family and friends.

'I wonder when they might return. What could cause them to do so, and how could they save me?'

"I am The Mórrígan." A tall, strong built woman in red stood before me, crows circled above her.

"is this what the crow meant?" I asked her, kneeling as I did so.

"I appreciate the gesture, your kneeling. But it is not necessary. We are equals- for the most part. You do not serve me, I do not rule you. We are a team. " She articulated with the spear in her right hand. A man came up beside her, holding a forked hazel stick. Without words they vanished. I looked around for a trace of either of them, only to find a black bird perched in a tree.

"I accept your calling. I hope I do not disappoint."

"Disappointment is part of learning and growing. I will be harsh, but only because it is what you need. I will teach you and guide you, provide some of the tools you need. But you will do the work. You will become a warrior. " And with that, the Goddess of Poetry, Magic, Battle and Change flew into the aether.

**This is based on my first encounter with The Mórrígan, an Irish goddess. She is my patron deity, and I am dedicated to Her for at least this lifetime. She has very much saved my life.**

You once saved a Crow from dying as a child. Even now that you are an adult, you still remember the Crow's words after you set it free back to its murder, "We… wiLL… RETurN… ThE… FAVor…"

[yuu-kantokusei]

Happy birthday, dear Prefect! 🎉✨️

POV: Twst characters (NRC, Grim, Rollo, Che'nya, Neige, Fellow/Ernesto, Skully, STAFF) wishing you a very wonderful "Happy birthday!"

PS: when it's your birthday, come here and let your favourite character to wish you fantastic wishes~

A/N: today is my birthday, so I decided to celebrate with my favourite boys because i love them so much and I wish them to be real

Heartslabyul

Riddle Rosehearts

“Happy birthday, Prefect. As per Rule #256 of the Heartslabyul Dorm, any individual celebrating a birthday must be properly honored with respect and festivity. I personally ensured today's preparations met the highest standards. I trust you'll enjoy the tea party we've arranged. Have a splendid day—you’ve earned it.”

Ace Trappola

“Heeey, Prefect! Happy birthday! Look, I didn’t even mess up the gift this time. Bet you’re surprised, huh? Anyway, let’s ditch the formal stuff and just have fun today. No weird rules or lectures from Riddle—just vibes!”

Deuce Spade

"Uh, Prefect! Happy birthday! I hope you like my gift. I wasn't sure what to get, so I asked Trey for help. Anyway, I promise to do my best to make today stress-free. You deserve it!”

Cater Diamond

"Prefect~! Smile for the Magicam! Gotta capture this special day, right? Happy birthday! Don't worry, I'll make sure today is totally picture-perfect. I even curated a playlist just for you!"

Trey Clover

“Happy birthday, Prefect. I baked a cake—your favorite flavor, I hope. If not, we can always make another one. Birthdays are meant for indulgence, after all.”

Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar

“Tch, birthdays are such a hassle... But since it’s your day, I guess I’ll play along. Don’t expect me to sing or anything, though. Anyway, happy birthday, herbivore. Do whatever makes you happy.”

Ruggie Bucchi

“Heeey, Prefect! Happy birthday! You better eat up—no wasting food, okay? Oh, and if you need a hand carrying all your presents, I gotcha. For a small fee, of course!”

Jack Howl

“Happy birthday, Prefect. I don’t usually get involved in celebrations, but today’s special for you, so I’m in. If anyone messes with your day, just say the word—I’ll handle it.”

Octavinelle

Azul Ashengrotto

“Ah, Prefect, our esteemed guest of honor. Happy birthday. Consider today an exception—no contracts, no negotiations. Just a day for you to enjoy yourself, courtesy of Mostro Lounge. Don't forget to savor the special limited-edition menu I curated for your celebration.”

Jade Leech

“Happy birthday, Prefect. What a delightful occasion. I trust today will be filled with pleasant surprises—some orchestrated by me, of course. Enjoy every moment.”

Floyd Leech

“Shrimpy-chaaan! Happy birthday! Let’s ditch all the boring stuff and do something fun! Oh, oh—what do you say to a wrestling match? I’ll go easy on ya since it’s your big day.”

Scarabia

Kalim Al-Asim

“Prefect! Happy birthday, my best friend! I’ve got a huge party planned—there’s music, dancing, and tons of food! I hope it’s the best birthday you’ve ever had. Come on, let’s go celebrate!”

Jamil Viper

“Happy birthday, Yuu. Don’t worry—I made sure Kalim didn’t go too overboard this time. I personally cooked the dishes for today, so I hope you enjoy them. Relax and have a good time.”

Pomefiore

Vil Schoenheit

“Ah, Prefect. How fortunate you are to celebrate your birthday in the presence of true beauty. I trust you’ll take extra care to look your best today—after all, every moment should be picture-worthy. Happy birthday.”

Rook Hunt

“Bonne fête, mon cher Trickster! Such radiance, such elegance on this special day! Ah, how splendid it is to witness your growth. I shall ensure every moment of today is worthy of poetry.”

Epel Felmier

“Hey, happy birthday, Prefect! Let’s make today wild, okay? None of that fancy frou-frou stuff Vil’s always talking about. Just good ol' fun!”

Ignihyde

Idia Shroud

“Ugh, social events... But, uh, since it’s your birthday, I guess I can make an exception. Happy birthday, Prefect. I even logged off my game for this—you're welcome.”

Ortho Shroud

“Happy birthday, Prefect! I calculated exactly 112 different activities to make today perfect. Let’s start with your favourite treats and work our way up to the surprise!”

Diasomnia

Malleus Draconia

“Ah, Child of man, it is your birthday today? How wonderful. A most sacred occasion indeed. I have brought you a gift—something rare and precious from Briar Valley. May this day be as unforgettable as your presence in my life.”

Lilia Vanrouge

“Happy birthday, Prefect! I’m so excited to celebrate with you. I’ve prepared a special meal—don’t be shy, have a bite! Hmm? Why do you look so hesitant?”

Sebek Zigvolt

“HUMAN! I—er, Happy Birthday! The young master himself has taken time to acknowledge your day, so you must be grateful! …But, truly, I hope it’s a fantastic day for you.”

Silver

“Happy birthday, Prefect. I hope your day is peaceful and filled with joy... Though I may fall asleep halfway through the celebration. Still, I wish you the best.”

~BONUS~

Grim

“Nyahahaha! Prefect, aren’t ya glad I’m the first one to say it? Happy birthday, minion! Let’s celebrate by eating lots of tuna and cake—and by cake, I mean MY share too!”

Rollo Flamme

“Though I normally detest such frivolities, I suppose it would be rude not to extend my regards... Happy birthday, Prefect. May this year bring you wisdom—and better taste in associates.”

Che'nya

“Heehee~ Happy birthday, Prefect! You look extra cute today! Or maybe it’s just me? Hmm, guess we’ll never know! Let’s see if I can pop by your celebration later... or disappear midway, who knows?”

Neige LeBlanche

“Oh my goodness, Prefect! Happy birthday! I hope today is filled with joy, laughter, and love! You deserve to be treated like royalty—just like a fairytale ending.”

Skully J. Graves

"Happy birthday, lovely Prefect. Life’s a journey, full of twists and turns, but you’ve got the guts to handle it. Keep walking your path with that steady resolve of yours and if you ever need a hand or some guidance, I’m around. Have a good one, yeah?”

Fellow Honest

“Heh, well now, sugarcube, happy birthday! I reckon you’ve been through a lot, so how ‘bout a deal to sweeten up the day? Only good surprises, I promise... this time.”

Dire Crowley

“Ah, my precious and most beloved magicless student! Happy birthday! As your humble headmaster, I insist that you accept this fabulous celebration I orchestrated personally—well, mostly! All for you!”

Divus Crewel

“Happy birthday, pup. I expect you to carry yourself with even more flair and refinement as you age. And don’t you dare let those unruly brats ruin your look today.”

Mozus Trein

“Ah, Prefect. Happy birthday. Remember, age brings wisdom—but only to those who study diligently. Now, do enjoy yourself.”

Ashton Vargas

“Happy birthday! Strength and stamina are key to a fulfilling life—so drop and give me twenty! Just kidding. Enjoy your special day, champ!”

Sam

“Hey, hey~ Happy birthday, my little imp! I’ve got just the thing for your special day—come by the shop later for a surprise on the house!”

[starmatzz]

Can u write like Dom yunho with grooming kink nd CNC

Like he loves to take care of y/n who is a dumb innocent doll

As she starts realising that the rules (she can't go out of the house without yunho, no friends, no work, yunho dresses her) yunho has for her are kinda crazy and tries to escape but gets caught

A full smut

𝐓𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬

bf!Yunho x gf!reader | smut | 4.6k

nsfw tags:

dom/sub, dollification, pet names, cnc, grooming kink, abuse, violence, controlling, handcuffs, gag, choking, threatening, vaginal sex, mxf, possessive behavior, cum, mocking, punishment, brainwashing, free use, daddy kink

author's note: phew! i tried my best hehe..hope you'll like it

You stood in the dimly lit living room, your hand resting against the cool glass of the window as you watched people your age laughing and walking together outside. Their voices carried through the air, light and carefree, while you remained on the other side of the glass—watching, not joining.

“What are you looking at, darling?”

A deep voice rumbled behind you, warm and familiar. You turned to see your boyfriend standing there, watching you with a soft, unreadable expression.

“I was wondering…” you hesitated, your voice small, uncertain. “If I could maybe… go outside sometimes.”

Your gaze dropped to the floor as soon as the words left your lips, as if saying them aloud made them too fragile, too easy to dismiss. The room was quiet for a moment, save for the faint sound of laughter filtering in from outside.

“Not today, my sweet girl, but tomorrow we can,” Yunho murmured, his voice gentle as he lifted your chin with a careful touch. 

“I’ll pick out some cute clothes for you,” he continued, a playful smile tugging at his lips. “Gonna make you look all pretty when we go outside, hm?” He tilted his head slightly, watching your expression as if making sure you weren’t too disappointed.

“Well… I was thinking that maybe I could go… alone,” you said carefully, your voice barely above a whisper.

The change in Yunho was immediate. His smile faded, and his warm gaze darkened, something unreadable flickering behind his eyes. The playful tilt of his head stilled, his grip on your chin tightening just slightly—not enough to hurt, but enough to make your breath hitch.

“Alone?” he echoed, as if tasting the word on his tongue, testing it. The room felt quieter now, the laughter from outside suddenly distant, as if the world beyond the window had pulled away.

You quickly realized your mistake, shaking your head as a nervous chill ran down your spine.

“N-no…” you stuttered, your voice barely steady.

Yunho’s eyes stayed locked on yours, unreadable, his grip lingering just a second longer before he finally let go. The weight of his gaze felt heavy, pressing down on you like an invisible force.

“That’s what I thought,” he murmured, his lips curving into a small smile—one that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He brushed a thumb over your cheek, his touch deceptively gentle. “You don’t need to go alone, princess. I’ll take care of you, always.”

The words were meant to be comforting, but something about them sent a shiver down your spine.

When evening came, Yunho guided you to the bathroom, his touch gentle but firm as he helped you wash your hair. His fingers worked through the strands with practiced care, massaging your scalp in slow, deliberate circles. The warm water cascaded down your back, but even in its comforting heat, you couldn’t ignore the way his presence lingered—always watching, always tending to you like you were something fragile, something to be kept.

Later, in your bedroom, he sat you down in front of the vanity, the low hum of the blow dryer filling the quiet space. His fingers combed through your damp hair, smoothing out any tangles with soft strokes before carefully drying each section. He was meticulous, ensuring every strand was perfectly in place, just the way he liked.

Yunho always made sure you looked perfect for him—his perfect doll. Hair carefully styled with delicate bows or glittering clips, soft makeup dusted over your cheeks, and the cutest outfits he could find. You were his masterpiece, his sweet, delicate thing.

“All done,” he murmured, setting the blow dryer aside and tilting your chin up to meet his gaze in the mirror. A satisfied smile played on his lips as he admired his work.

“Perfect, just like always.”

Yunho gently slid the robe off your shoulders, letting it pool at your feet. The cool air brushed against your skin, but before you could react, he was already slipping a pair of soft pink shorts up your legs, his touch slow and deliberate.

“There we go,” he murmured, his voice soothing as he smoothed the fabric over your hips.

Next, he grabbed one of his shirts—a loose, oversized thing that still carried his scent—and carefully guided it over your head. The material hung off your frame, drowning you in its warmth, the sleeves nearly covering your hands.

His eyes softened, but there was something possessive in the way he looked at you, like he was making sure you belonged to him in every possible way.

He reached out, gently brushing your hair back into place before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “Now, let’s get you to bed, sweetheart.”

Like always, Yunho pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead, tucking the blankets around you before pulling you close. His warmth surrounded you, his steady breathing in your ear like a lullaby. It was routine—his kiss, his touch, his presence wrapping around you like an unshakable force.

But tonight, sleep didn’t come.

Your mind was restless, turning over thoughts you usually pushed away. You stared at the ceiling, heart beating a little too fast, a little too loud.

The rules.

You weren’t allowed to go outside alone.

You couldn’t have friends.

You couldn’t work.

You couldn’t even dress yourself.

Everything—every part of your life—belonged to Yunho.

And for the first time in a long time, you wondered what it would feel like to take something back.

The night had passed slowly, and when morning finally came, you didn’t expect anything to be different.

Yunho woke you gently, brushing a strand of hair from your face with the same tenderness he always had. His touch, warm and familiar, stirred you awake from your dreams, and you blinked up at him, still wrapped in the haze of sleep.

“Good morning, my sweet little girl,” he murmured, his voice smooth and comforting.

Before you could fully gather your senses, he scooped you up, cradling you in his arms as he carried you to the bathroom. His movements were effortless, like it was second nature to take care of you in every way. He set you down carefully and began the usual morning routine: running the water just the right temperature, helping you wash your face, brushing your hair, guiding you through the motions with the same quiet patience as always.

Then, he dressed you again—soft, pastel clothes, always perfectly chosen to suit you. Your world, your body, your choices, were all carefully controlled by him, as if he were constructing the perfect image of you, piece by piece.

You looked in the mirror, and for a moment, it all felt so ordinary. Until your own reflection stared back at you, and a small, unfamiliar thought flickered in the back of your mind.

You sat across from Yunho at the breakfast table, the soft clink of utensils in the quiet morning air. He was holding his usual cup of coffee, his eyes thoughtful as he stared into the dark liquid, as if pondering something important.

“I was thinking…” Yunho began, his voice slow, deliberate. “That I need to protect you more.”

You paused, the air suddenly feeling heavier, though you couldn’t place why. His gaze met yours, intense and steady, and for a brief moment, you wondered what exactly he meant.

Then, with a small smile, he reached into his pocket and pulled something out—a delicate bracelet, glinting softly in the light.

“This,” Yunho continued, his fingers brushing over the smooth surface of the bracelet as he held it out to you, “allows me to watch you y/n, wherever you are.”

Your eyes widened as he placed it in your palm. The weight of the object felt strangely heavy, like it held more than just its physical presence. It was a tether, a connection you hadn’t asked for, yet there it was, pressing against your skin.

“You’ll always be safe,” he said, his voice low and reassuring, but there was something in the way he said it that made a shiver run down your spine. “Always.”

You nodded, unsure what else to say, your fingers tightening around the bracelet as you tried to make sense of the feeling growing in your chest.

“But why—” you started, confusion clouding your voice as you looked at the bracelet in your hand.

“Don’t worry your pretty head about it, angel,” Yunho interrupted, his smile soft but insistent, as if the answer was already clear and you didn���t need to ask any more questions.

His thumb gently wiped the corner of your mouth, where a small smear of yogurt had left a mark. The tender gesture was so familiar, so routine, and yet, it felt almost too intimate in that moment, like he was reminding you of how little you needed to worry about anything but him.

“You don’t need to understand everything,” he murmured, eyes fixed on you as if watching for any hint of resistance. “Just trust me, okay?”

The sudden ringing of Yunho’s phone cut through the moment, and he groaned softly, irritation flashing across his face.

“Gotta answer this,” he muttered, standing up from the table. He didn’t even glance at you as he straightened his shirt, the usual calm demeanor falling into place. “Be a good girl while I deal with this, okay? Make me proud.”

He petted your hair, fingers gently brushing through the strands, and for a second, you almost felt comforted by the gesture. But then, he was turning away, heading upstairs with his phone pressed to his ear, his footsteps echoing in the quiet house.

You sat there, the empty space around you feeling oddly suffocating, the sound of his voice drifting off into the distance. It wasn’t the first time he had left you alone, but something about it felt different this time. Something about his words lingered in the air, unspoken expectations hanging like a weight over your chest.

You were left with your thoughts again, the bracelet still resting heavy in your palm, and the quiet feeling of being… controlled.

The weight of everything—his rules, his control, the constant feeling of being watched—had built up over time, but now, it felt unbearable. The room was quiet, the house still, but your mind raced, no longer able to ignore the growing knot of unease in your stomach.

You couldn’t do it anymore. You couldn’t keep living like this.

That night, you spent hours staring at the ceiling, your mind working through every possible way to get out. Every escape route, every detail, every risk—thinking it through over and over, your heart pounding as you came to one conclusion: you had to leave.

It wasn’t that you didn’t love Yunho. You did. But the love he gave was suffocating, controlling, like a cage you had spent too long trying to ignore. You needed to be your own person again, to breathe without feeling trapped by the life he had built around you.

Your heart raced as you quickly stood up, glancing around the room. The silence felt almost deafening, every small sound echoing in your ears. Yunho was still upstairs, his voice barely audible through the floorboards, absorbed in his call.

You didn’t hesitate. Without another thought, you left the bracelet on the table—its presence still lingering in the air like a warning—and stepped silently past the kitchen. Your footsteps were muffled against the cool floors as you moved toward the main hall.

Each step felt like it carried the weight of a thousand unspoken thoughts, the fear and the thrill mixing into one knot in your chest. You kept your movements calculated, making sure not to make a sound, but the pulse of urgency in your veins kept you moving forward.

The door was just ahead. The world outside, with all its uncertainty, seemed closer than ever. But the closer you got, the more the reality of what you were doing hit you. Leaving meant breaking free, but it also meant leaving behind the life you had known with Yunho. The consequences weren’t clear, but you couldn’t stay locked away any longer.

You reached the door, your hand on the handle. This was it.

As you slowly turned the handle, the door creaked open with a soft groan, the air on the other side feeling cooler, more open. You paused, a cold shiver running down your spine.

It was too quiet.

No distant sound of Yunho’s voice, no hint of movement from upstairs—just the stillness of the house pressing in on you. The quiet felt unnatural, unsettling.

You took a cautious step forward, then another, but the silence seemed to swallow each footfall. Something didn’t feel right.

It wasn’t the usual peace you’d grown used to—it was an eerie stillness, as if the house itself was holding its breath, waiting.

You stopped at the threshold, torn between the pull of freedom and the heavy feeling creeping in. Something told you to turn back, but the door was already half-open, the world beyond it just a step away.

“Get. Back. Now.”

The command hit you like a punch to the gut, cold and sharp, and your body froze in place.

It was Yunho. His voice was low, steady, yet it carried a weight that felt impossible to ignore. You could hear the anger behind it, the control, the edge that made every muscle in your body lock in place.

For a moment, you stood there, paralyzed by the sudden shift in the atmosphere. The door was still ajar, the outside world just within reach, but now it felt like you were trapped between two worlds.

Slowly, you turned around, meeting his gaze. Yunho was standing at the top of the stairs, eyes dark and unblinking, his expression unreadable but full of something fierce, something you hadn’t seen in a long time.

“Did you really think you could just walk out?” His voice was quieter now, but the danger in it made your heart race.

You swallowed, the weight of everything crashing down on you. The door behind you felt like an escape, but his presence, the tension in his gaze, made it feel like a trap.

His words sliced through the stillness of the moment, sharp and venomous. “Close the door, pretty girl.”

The command sent a chill down your spine, and without thinking, you obeyed, your hands shaking as you gently pulled the door shut. The sound of it closing felt final, like a door shutting on everything you’d hoped for.

Before you could even process what was happening, Yunho was there, moving swiftly toward you. His expression was cold, darker than you’d ever seen, and his presence seemed to fill the entire space.

“You broke a rule,” he said, his voice steady but heavy with an unmistakable threat. “You know what that means.”

Before you could react, he scooped you up with alarming force, throwing you over his shoulder as if you were weightless. Panic surged through your body, and you tried to struggle, but his grip was unyielding.

“You’re not going anywhere,” he murmured, his voice barely more than a growl as he carried you, your body pressed against him. The walls of the house seemed to close in, and with every step he took, the weight of your actions settled heavily in your chest.

Yunho couldn't believe it, couldn't believe that his perfect doll was trying to leave him. 

The words rushed out of your mouth in a desperate, pleading tone. “Please! I am sorry, I am sorry!” You tried to wriggle free, but his hold on you was firm, unrelenting.

Yunho didn’t even glance at you as he walked toward the bedroom, his expression cold, as if he’d already made up his mind.

“I thought I taught my princess well,” he said, his voice laced with disappointment. “Guess I need to be less nice next time.” He shook his head as he reached the bed, and in one swift motion, he threw you down onto the soft surface. The sudden impact left you breathless, and for a moment, you could only stare up at him, heart racing, chest tight with anxiety.

The air between you two was thick, and you could feel it—he was angry. You had crossed a line, and he wasn’t about to let it go easily. His eyes never left you as he stood over the bed, looming, as if deciding what to do next.

In that moment, you felt small, vulnerable, and trapped.

He crawled on top of you, straddling your hips as he pulled something out from under a pillow. A pair of handcuffs and a ball gag. 

“No! Please stop!” your eyes widened as you shook your head, putting your hands in front of yourself. 

His voice was dangerously calm, a stark contrast to the storm that swirled in his eyes. “Be a good little girl for me, okay?”

The question wasn’t really a question at all—it was an expectation, one you had no choice but to meet. The weight of his words pressed down on you, and for a moment, all you could do was nod, your chest tight with the tension that had built between you.

He grabbed your wrists, clipping on the silver cuffs. Then, with a focused expression, he slipped the gag into your mouth, tightening its leather straps behind your head.

You looked at him, your eyes filled with tears, your heart pounding wildly in your chest. The weight of what you had done hung over you, and you could feel the fear tightening in your stomach. You knew, deep down, that you had messed up, and there was no escaping the consequences that would come.

“Tears won't make me change my mind,” Yunho said firmly as he rolled up your skirt, a determined look in his eyes. His hand gripped on your thigh, his long fingers tracing small circles on your exposed skin as he slowly moved to position himself.

“Daddy needs to remind you what happens when you disobey, y/n” Yunho repeated, his tone low and authoritative. His hand moved from your thigh to your jaw, gripping it firmly as he pulled you close. “I wanted what's best for you, and this is what I get in return?!” he continued, his eyes locked on your face with a mix of frustration and disappointment.

He eagerly pulled down his pants, pulling your lace panties to the side. “Don't you dare make a sound,” he murmured, hovering above you.

Yunho's actions were deliberate, and he paid no mind to the lack of preparation. He knew what he wanted, and he wasn't about to let something like that stop him.

Your efforts to squirm and resist were futile as Yunho held you firmly in place, his grip strong and unyielding. 

“Gonna fuck you so good..that's what you're for. My personal fuckdoll to use whenever I feel like.”

Yunho's frustration grew as he heard your whine and felt you attempt to close your legs. His growl of impatience only got stronger, his grip on you tightening. “Don't you dare close your legs,” he growled, “spread 'em.”

You shook your head, looking at him with pleading eyes. 

A sharp smack suddenly echoed through the room as Yunho's hand came down on your cheek, a harsh and unexpected response to your plea. The sting stung, leaving a faint red mark on your skin, a sign of his frustration and dominance.

You felt tears roll down your cheeks, before sensing a subtle pressure at your opening.

“Don't make me hit you again,” Yunho warned, his voice dangerously low. His expression was a mixture of determination and frustration, and in one fluid motion, he pressed forward, sinking into your tight heat. 

A gasp escaped your lips as the burning pain struck without warning, your body jerking and arching in response. The searing heat shot through you, leaving a trail of raw agony that seemed to freeze time itself. For a moment, you couldn’t breathe, caught between the shock and the unrelenting sting that pulsed through your every nerve.

“So pretty y/n, my pretty little girl..” A low, almost guttural moan escaped his lips as he spoke, a mixture of praise and wonder in his voice. He stared at you with dark eyes, taking in the image of you beneath him.

You laid there, your wrists cuffed and your once-perfect hair now tangled and disheveled. His hands slid down on your hips, the hold almost bruising. 

“Want daddy to stop, baby?” Yunho's voice was laced with mock concern as he spoke, his pout exaggerated and the look on his face a clear indication that he had no intention of stopping. His eyes were trained on your face, taking in the streaks of mascara that trickled down your cheeks.

He pulled back slowly, only to slam back into you, making your body jolt forward. 

You felt the tip of his cock bruise your cervix, the pain so diabolical you choked on a sob and dug your nails into your palms. 

“Aw did it hurt, princess?” he asked again, the repetition of the question almost mocking, “is daddy's cock too much to take? Too big for your tight, pretty little pussy?” his fingers traced a path over your body, before performing the piercing thrust again. 

Your back arched off the bed, your hands shaking from the intense sensations coursing through your body. Yunho set up the same relentless pace, his own pleasure apparent in his expression. He took in the image of you, the arch in your back and the tremors in your hands as evidence of the control he had over you. 

Yunho's head tilted back, his eyes closed as he let out a low moan. He was lost in the pleasure, his focus solely on the sensations flooding through him.

He lifted your hips, holding them in the air as he pounded into you, dangerously deep with that angle. Your soft cries and whines spilled out, though muffled by the rubber gag seated in your mouth.

“Fuck, your pussy feels so good, so tight,” he breathed out, leaning over you and looking into your red, puffy eyes. 

“You're beautiful like this, my precious y/n,” a whisper, warm against your neck, but still sending a shiver down your spine. 

You whimpered, the pain crashing over you in waves, too much to bear. “Look at me,” Yunho commanded, his voice deep and unwavering, a stark contrast to the chaos in your mind. It cut through the fog of agony, pulling your focus, demanding your attention despite the searing discomfort.

You met his gaze, locking onto his dark eyes. The intensity in them was unnerving, the look almost psychotic—dangerous, wild, like he could see straight through you, unraveling everything. It sent a chill down your spine, the heat of the pain momentarily forgotten as his eyes held you captive.

His voice was low, controlled, but there was an edge to it as he leaned in, his breath ragged. “If I take it off, do you promise you’ll be good?” he asked, sweat clinging to his hair, dripping down his forehead. His gaze moved to the ball gag in your mouth. 

You nodded immediately, and Yunho paused for a moment, his hand lifting up your head with a firm yet gentle motion. Without a word, he moved swiftly, his fingers working to unbuckle the gag with precision. 

He tossed it aside with a swift motion, and for the first time, you were able to close your mouth. The relief was instant, but it left you swallowing the excess saliva that had built up, the sensation oddly grounding after the tension of the moment. 

“What a good doll.”

Yunho's gaze was unwavering as he continued with his quick and deliberate pace. He kept his eyes on your face, watching your expressions intently, enjoying the sight of you writhing and whimpering beneath him. 

“Who do you belong to?” he growled, his voice thick with raw intensity. His movements grew jerky and uncoordinated, as if the demand was unraveling something inside of him, pushing him to the edge. 

“Y-you…” you whined, your voice trembling as you sniffled, the words barely escaping your lips. The mix of pain and desire in the air made it hard to focus, but you knew what he wanted. Every part of you was raw, vulnerable in his presence.

“Exactly,” Yunho chuckled darkly, his voice low and almost predatory. His hand moved to your throat, fingers tightening just enough to send a shiver down your spine, a mix of power and control settling in the air between you. 

“And you deserved this, right?” he asked, his voice low and filled with dark satisfaction as he tightened his fingers around your throat, the pressure a reminder of his control. 

“Yes,” you choked out, the word strained as you swallowed hard, the pressure around your throat making it difficult to breathe. 

“Yes what?” he raised his eyebrows. 

“Yes daddy,” you sobbed, gasping for air. 

“Good girl,” Yunho smiled, his voice softening for a moment as he released his grip on your throat. 

Yunho's eyes shut tightly, his pace increasing to a quick and desperate rhythm. The change in speed caused a sharper cry to escape your lips as your hands balled info fists. 

“Fuck..fuck..” Yunho groaned, biting his lip. “Open,” he ordered, his eyes still tightly closed as if lost in the moment. His voice held an undeniable command and bit of desperation. Without hesitation, you opened your mouth and stuck your tong out, anticipating his next move, your body responding before your mind could fully catch up. 

He quickly pulled out, gripping his aching cock as he aimed at your tongue. A high pitched moan escaped his lips as he shoot strings of hot cum on your tongue, painting it white. 

“Swallow,” he said simply, his gaze never leaving you, dark and unwavering. 

You immediately swallowed the salty substance, your body trembling with the effort as you stuck out your now clean tongue, the act almost instinctual in response to his command. The tension in the air still hung heavy, your submission clear in the way you followed his every move without question.

“Such a good girl,” he groaned, his voice thick with approval. His thumb gently wiped away the excess seed from your bottom lip, the soft motion a contrast to the intensity in his eyes. Each touch felt like a reward, a subtle reminder of his control and your obedience.

“You know,” he mumbled, pulling his sweatpants back up with a slow, deliberate motion. “Only I know what’s best for you,” he added, his voice low and steady, the words lingering in the space between you. 

“Understand?” he asked, his voice sharper now, a bite of command cutting through the air. “You can’t do anything yourself,” he continued, his gaze unwavering as he unlocked your handcuffs. His hands moved to gently rub your sore wrists. 

You nodded, your body still trembling as he wiped away your tears, his touch soft and reassuring. His fingers combed through your hair, the gentle gesture almost soothing amidst the chaos. 

Without a word, he scooped you up effortlessly, cradling you in his arms as he carried you to the bathroom, ready to clean you up, his presence a steadying force in the aftermath.

After you were clean again, he dressed you carefully, his movements tender as he ensured you were comfortable before gently placing you on the bed. You were sore, exhausted, every part of you aching with the weight of what had just passed. It was clear—Yunho knew exactly what was best for you. He lay down beside you, pulling you close, his warmth wrapping around you like a protective shield, offering a sense of calm after the storm.

“I love you, my precious little girl,” he mumbled against your soft hair, but there was an edge to his voice now, something darker, like a warning. His grip on you tightened, possessive and unyielding, as if the words were more of a claim than a comfort. The room felt colder, the silence thicker, and you could sense the weight of his gaze still on you even as you closed your eyes. It wasn’t reassurance—it was control, and it lingered in the air like a shadow, heavy and unspoken.

[channieskies]

L O S E R [HJS]

♫ Pairing: Han Jisung × Reader [F] ♫ Summary: His father disapproves of his life choices, and it subsequently causes a rift between the two of them. Jisung only has one person he feels he can rely on, his best friend. With hopes of becoming one of the biggest rockstars that ever lived, he embarks on a journey to fulfill his life dreams. Will he make his dreams come true with his friend by his side, or will he even sacrifice friendship to live out his fantasy's? ♪ WC: 19.7k [READING TIME: 40-60 MINS] ♪ AU: Highschool, Rockstar ♪ Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff (adjacent), Friends to (??) ♪ Nets: @neverendingdreams-net & @mirohs-aurora-society ♫ A.N: I started writing this over a year ago (Nov 2023) and I've been writing on it little by little since then. When the "Hold My Hand" mv came out, I got burst of inspiration I needed to finish this. I took a while to finish, but it's here. This has not been proofread. Please reblog and leave a comment to let me know how you feel. I'd love a little feedback. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it. Special thanks to @therhythmafterthesummer thanks for rooting for me with this one. I don't think I could have finished it without your encouragement. Dividers by @saradika-graphics ♫ Disclaimer: This story does not reflect the real lives or personalities of Stray Kids. I do not know them personally. This is purely a work of fiction. ♫ Warnings: MINORS DNI! This post contains nsfw material. Please do not interact with it if you are under the age of 18. Unprotected sex (Be safe and wrap it up. This is fiction, a controlled narrative. I make the rules. Life isn't that simple, so be safe), creampie (semi), cum shot, slight degradation (male receiving), slight femdom/sub (male) dynamics, choking, cum play, cum eating, spiting, hair pulling (male receiving). Do not translate or repost here or on other sites. This chapter contains use of explicit language.

Loser, 외톨이, 센 척하는 겁쟁이 못된 양아치, 거울 속의 넌 Just a loser, 외톨이, 상처뿐인 머저리 더러운 쓰레기, 거울 속의 난, I'm a...

The words resounded in the back of Jisung's mind as he continued to feel the kicks and punches from his classmates. See, with him, you either liked him or you didn't. Sadly, there didn't seem to be an in-between. There was no indifference and there didn't seem to be many that liked him, either. He had a handful of acquaintances, but only one good, true friend. She was the light of his life, that and music. In times like this, when he was beaten and battered, cast out, and torn down by the world, he knew that if he just held on, she'd be there. 

There to comfort him, there to lift him up, there to hold his hand and tell him that it gets better. That's what he had to hold on to, “it gets better.” The promise of that alone gave him enough hope that he'd get through these tumultuous teenage years and one day look back at this and consider it a learning experience. Just something he could mark off as a growth exercise. At least that's what he hoped. He hoped to turn all the shity life struggles into art. His words, his life, his voice. He refused to be a loser.

Jisung wanted nothing more in life than to play his music for the people who appreciated it. For the most part that meant that he was playing it for a crowd of one, you. But he didn’t mind if the venue wasn’t fancy, or if it was just one person taking in the songs that he performed. Just the look of pure joy on your face from listening to his voice, gave him enough hope that one day he could do this on a larger scale. He just hoped that you would be one of the smiling faces when he looked out at the crowd.

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Prestige, influence, wealth. Was that really something worth betting your life and sanity on? According to his parents it was absolutely worth it. Those things were the reason the Han's were where they were in life and they would bite their tongues and die before ever going back to being poor and worthless. At least that's how his father saw things. “Jisung, you have to listen to your father. All he wants is for you to have a good life. Not waste it away-”

“Id waste away staying here. Mom…” He stopped throwing things in his bag to hold his mothers hands, to look her in the eyes. He wanted her, if no one else in this house, to understand why he had to leave. It wasn't about the constant fights with his father, or even the fact that he just couldn’t and probably would never live up to what his older brother had become. He wasn’t built for the life that his parents had set up for him. It physically pained him to even think of himself trapped in the box of boring, yet successful, that his parents wanted to fit him into.

No, he just felt unfulfilled, dead inside. He was slowly rotting away with every breath he took under the rule of his fathers thumb. “I can't let him dictate what should and should not make me happy. Music is everything to me, you know this. So please, just let me go. You know I can't survive here.” He dropped his head, looking at the floor, “He'll kill everything about me.. until there is no use in being alive.” He had made up his mind. Despite the comfort that being home provided him, he’d rather take his chances out on the streets than endure one more moment trapped inside of this amenity filled mansion.

His mother gasped. Just the thought of her baby not being on this earth anymore, crushed her. She pulled her son into a hug for what might be the last time. “There is money in my purse, take that with you. Okay?” She grabbed his face, taking in her son's features. She caressed his chubby cheeks and placed kisses on both. “I love you. Forever and always.” The front door slammed downstairs, alerting them to his father's arrival. The panic set in on both his and his mothers faces.

Oftentimes Mr. Han seemed like he hated Jisung, his own son, just like he hated people who weren't in the same social economic class as him. They had no drive or ambition according to him, no will to make their life better, to be better. As if people didn’t fall on hard times, or suffer from any mental illnesses, making it hard for them to keep a job. He was a hypocrite. Jisung’s grandfather didn’t keep a steady job for years, and the jobs he had were very low income. He provided for his family as best he could, but apparently people like that were scum to Jisung's father. Being poor and struggling were things that his father had long left behind. Along with things like passion, empathy, and even love.

“HAN JI SUNG! GET DOWN HERE THIS INSTANT.” Jisung's heart quickened with the sound of his fathers angry, booming voice. His anxiety was starting to kick in, his breathing picked up, just as his extremities started to lightly shake. He had to have heard about Jisung's outburst in school today, which resulted in the cops being called to his prestigious catholic high school. With his fathers position in the Mayors office, of course this news made it to him. The police probably went and told him the news themselves. This wasn't going to be good. 

“Go out the back, I'll distract him.” She kissed his forehead and headed down the stairs, swiftly. Jisung stuffed all the clothes he could into his duffle, and started out the door, just to stop in his tracks. Next to his bed was a picture of him and his best friend. The one person who could get him through anything. From breakups and heartbreak to bouts of depression, they had been through almost everything together. He grabbed the frame and carefully stuffed it into the bag. 

“I know he's here! Move out my way woman!” He pushed past his wife, physically moving the small woman out of his way. Jisung could hear his fathers heavy footsteps as he made his way up the grand staircase in the foyer. Panic began to flow through the young boy's body. Making sure the coast was clear, he headed out into the hall from his room. The nearest exit of sorts was way at the end of the hall, two whole bedrooms and a bathroom away from his little corner room upstairs. 

He wasn’t much of a runner, even if he was considered to be quick, but he put all of the techniques he’d learned in physical education to work, sprinting down the hall. He made it to his brother's old room and out onto the balcony. Even though he was deathly afraid of heights, this was his only option, if he wanted to escape. It was fight or flight, and he was sure if he tried to fight his dad he’d die. His dad was filled with rage at the current moment and that did not bode well for Jisung. All he could see over the edge was the garden that bordered the pool. 

His mothers pretty array of hibiscus flowers and the cherry blossom tree that sat not far from the window, well manicured and perfect, just like everything else in the Han family’s life. He could hear his father nearing closer, his booming voice filling the large halls and bouncing off the walls, even with the constant pitter patter of his fast beating heart. It was now or never. He closed his eyes, the voice of his best-friend rang through his head, “You can do anything you put your mind to, Ji.” It was like her words gave him wings. That was all the reassurance he needed. 

Just as his father burst through the door to his brother's room, Jisung took the leap. He landed on the bushes below with a loud thud. His father's head peaked over the balcony. “You better stay right where you are, young man.” There was a small tinting of something else besides anger and disdain on his fathers face. 

But Jisung didn’t have the time to try and decipher it as his father made his way back into his brother’s room. No, if he didn’t want to face whatever was coming his way via his fathers slightly justified anger, he needed to go. Jisung hurried to his feet, running out the back gate of their sprawling mansion grounds, never to look back again. 

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“Shit…” He'd been roaming for hours now. The afternoon had turned into evening. The beautiful blue tinted sky shifted into pinks and purples and now it was just pitch black. He had nowhere to go. His feet hurt, his stomach hadn’t stopped grumbling since he got a few miles away from home, and he was terribly tired. Then there also was the fact that he had stupidly left the money his mother wanted him to have, right where she told him it was. He was broke and homeless. Not the best combination at the young age of eighteen. But most had survived worse. At least that's what that weird side of youtube and tik tok said. He was sure he would make it too. At least that's what he hoped.

He walked aimlessly until the streets started to look familiar. The houses were smaller than the ones in his- well his parents neighborhood, but that didn’t make them small. The mini mansions had long curving driveways and tall fences to keep the riff raff out. Well, guess you could say he was the riff raff now. 

He was a delinquent with an extensive record. Trespassing, disorderly conduct, disturbing the peace, failure to disperse, affray, unlawful assembly, and resisting arrest, the last two were tacked on today. The other charges had been adding up since his fifteenth birthday. The only reason he was a free man was the simple fact that he was a Han. He knew that, and it ate away at his core.

Well manicured lawns with expensive cars in the park. This was your side of town. Your family was quite well off as well, just in a different way. Building on the wealth that your maternal grandfather had built for your family. Your parents weren’t as power thirsty as his father was. But that wasn’t saying that they didn’t take your future success in life very seriously. They did. Your schedule was often packed to the brim with extracurriculars and volunteering, just to make sure that your high school resume made it easier for you to get into a good university.

He recognized your street name and he took off in a sprint. Trying to hurry his way to your house. He needed to see you. He needed reassurance for you that he did the right thing by running away. Because without your words of encouragement, he doubted he’d be able to survive the night, let alone live like this. He’d just have to tuck his tail between his legs and go back home to receive whatever punishment his father deemed appropriate. He had nearly a block to go when the familiar sound of sirens and the look of security lights stopped him in his tracks. “Where are you headed to, son?” Jisung sighed. He didn’t need this right now.

“My friend lives on the next block.” 

The guard got out of his car and approached Jisung, an uncertain expression on his face. He didn’t even attempt to hide it. The round and nearly bald, older man looked Jisung up and down, eyes doubtful of his story. “Right, and what is this friend's name?” The man pulled out an iPad with a list of residents in this large subdivision. 

“Y/l/n, Y/n. She lives with her parents…” He sighed, “Dr. And Mr.'s Y/l/n.” Jisung peered over the tablet to see if he could find you, only to find the guard way too immersed in a game of candy crush. “Seriously?” 

The security guard cleared his throat and tapped out of his games screen. “What was the name again?” with an exasperated sigh, Jisung told him your information again. He quickly contacted them, stepping away from Jisung to talk. 

“Yes, good evening. This is Sheldon with Rutherglen Security. I was out on patrol this evening when I spotted a young man out on a run with a duffle bag. When I stopped him he informed me he was trying to go see the daughter of this residence..- ah, his name?” He looked back at Jisung who was impatiently tapping his fingers on his jeans as he stood in the middle of the road, bag strapped across his chest. “What’s your name, kid?”

“Jisung. Han Jisung.” The man nodded and looked away again.

“Jason? Han Jason- Oh okay. I'll make sure to drop him off expeditiously.” He hung up and turned to the boy again. “I guess your story adds up. Get in. I'll drop you off.” He said nothing more and made his way around the tiny smart car, getting in. Jisung eyed the vehicle apprehensively. The window slowly rolled down, “On with it! I don't have all night.” 

The ride was short, he was nearly a block away when he was stopped. The gates to the driveway opened, revealing the lit up rounded pathway that led to the cream colored, French style home with black accents. It was traditional enough not to stick out, but still had a bit of modern flare to it. Truthfully, Jisung always thought your parents were like their house. Vocal, but both vocal enough to rock the boat. 

Some of their opinions didn’t line up with the traditional values of the overall community of Rutherglen, and he admired that. The security guard parked right in front of the house. Jisung could see someone jogging down the staircase inside. The lights in the house lit up with motion, so it made sense to him. The wooden door swung open to reveal a very winded girl, dressed in a band tee and bicycle shorts. 

“Haven't you gotten yourself in enough trouble today?” You rushed out before he could even unbuckle his seat and open the door. “Thank you so much…” Your eyes met the security guards as you leaned into the open window.

“Sheldon.” The security guard nodded.

“Sheldon. Thank you so much.” You opened the door for your friend only for Sheldon to speak up again.

“Excuse me, but are your parents home? I need to go over this with them.” You ushered Jisung out of the car and closed the door, leaning on it as you peeked your head in once again.

“My father is away at a medical conference and my mother is in the Maldives on vacation after major surgery, neither would like to be disturbed. But if you want to hear what my dad sounds like when he's angry, you can give him a ring.” Your voice sounded so sweet, but threatening at the same time. Like honey with the sting of a ghost pepper.

“Ah- no, that's fine. I'll just send them a write up. Have a good night.” He cranked the car back up. “And son, try to stay off the streets at night. You looked like you were up to no good.” 

Before Jisung could answer you interjected, “He will, no worries. Have a beautiful night, Sheldon. Stay safe out there.” With nothing left to say, you pulled your friend into your house and up the stairs to your room. As if the two of you weren't alone, you closed the door. “What they hell, Ji? Your mom called me worried sick, saying you'd gone off and run away. What the hell?” You hissed. You paced back and forth, mind racing.

He sighed, letting the bag he had bared the weight of for just a few hours, fall from him. He was tired and it hadn't even been a day yet. “I.. I couldn't take it anymore. I just knew what he was going to say. What he was going to tell me. How he was going to lay into me for not being good enough. How disappointed he was. How much he wished I could be more like my brother. I just… I couldn't deal with it anymore. He already thinks I'm a failure for not making the grades my brother made. But now I'm even more of a failure.” He plopped onto your fluffy purple bean bag that was situated in your reading nook. 

“Music is to be listened to, not pursued, according to him. I shouldn't entertain these ludicrous fantasies. You know where he took me the other day? To the unhoused encampment near the city center. He told me I'd end up there if I didn't listen to him and do as I was told.” He looked dejected and you wanted to do nothing more than to hold him and tell him everything will be alright. “I guess I just… beat him to the punch.” You sighed, your heart broke for him. He didn't deserve to be treated like that, no one did, really. But especially not Jisung.

“You aren't unhoused, just yet. Tomorrow, I'll skip school and we can look around to find some place to rest your head. Until my parents get back, you can stay here with me. I could use the company.” You could feel a bit of the burden lift off his shoulders and for the first time in a very long time, you saw him smile. He needed this pep talk more than you knew. It made his heart feel a little bit lighter knowing he wouldn’t be navigating this big change in his life without you.

“You know, I don't know what I'd do without you.” He stood unexpectedly and crossed the room to you, pulling you into a tight hug. “You're the best.” You could feel he meant it as he melted into you. He really didn't know what he would do without you. It sounded cliche, but you were literally the wind beneath his wings, his better half. Without you there was no him. He would have come crashing down to earth long ago if it wasn't for you. Your encouraging words always kept him uplifted. Your support always made him strive to be the best at whatever it was he was trying to pursue this week. You were his everything. 

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The next morning you woke up as early as you would for school. You were the top of your class, in line to be valedictorian. They might miss you today, but that didn’t matter as long as you made sure that your best friend was taken care of. Jisung had been there through the worst years of your life. He was quite literally your only friend. The only one who cared enough to stick around when it seemed that everyone in the world turned their back on you, just because the glitter of popularity seemed too tempting to say no to. 

In your freshman year of school your long time best friend Michelle, someone you'd known since babyhood, decided that her popularity over summer break wasn't worth losing. She'd hit puberty and filled out, so that made her popular with older boys. She couldn't take being seen with a “flat chested loser,” like yourself. She acted as though you hadn’t been friends all your lives. She started ignoring you, and the kicker, started rumors that you were doing sexual favors for the grades you were receiving. She knew better, you'd tutored her the summer before, just to make sure she'd have an easy transition into high school. Maybe you should have let her flounder.

You met Jisung during your summer vacation that same year. It was fate, really. You found out he'd moved around a lot before his family decided to settle in Rutherglen. His father had political aspirations, and this would be the perfect place to put down roots and start the career he always wanted. The way he described his folks almost sounded like how yours were. Father with big aspirations to be something better than what his father was. Mother who cares, but will ultimately side with the father. Plus you both had siblings. His older brother that was amounting to big things in life and your younger brother, two years your junior, who was the love of your mothers life. 

You bonded on your love of anime and rock music. Even your views of the world seemed to align. You spent every waking hour with that boy. You exchanged numbers and the rest was history. You'd been inseparable since. So giving up a few hours or days to help your one and only best friend, no matter the circumstances, was absolutely necessary. 

The boy slept like a log. But you understood, he had a hell of a day the day before. He got arrested for staging a protest on campus grounds for LGBTIQ+ rights, which wasn’t the smartest move to make on the campus of an ultra conservative Christian school. His stances went against the school's clear directive, that gay relationships were blasphemous and against all of their beliefs. And though you agree with him, that love is love and should be accepted as such. You knew it would ruffle too many feathers, especially if he didn’t go about it the right way. 

The protest was a mess. He had only managed to get a few students on his side, and they mostly backed out right before the protest was set to begin. The signs the both of you stayed up to make were torn by the kids that liked to ridicule you and bully Jisung. Then when asked by the headmaster to disassemble, Ji stood ten toes down and even cuffed himself to the door that led from the courtyard and into the school. That's how the cops were called. Then he ran away from home. On top of all of that, he almost got detained on his way to your house. 

He deserved to sleep as hard and as long as he wanted. But time was of the essence and him finding at least a roof was imminent. Jisung sounded like a vacuum cleaner as he snored. His mouth was wide open. One leg was under your mattress, how it got there you didn't know and you certainly weren't going to ask. The blanket was wrapped around him like a cocoon and both his hands were stretched above his head like he was superman.

You'd say he looked like a boy with no problems, that was if you didn't know any better. He had plenty of problems. Ones that needed to be handled immediately, you had a “parents are coming home any day now" , type of deadline. You shook him, “Ji, wake up.” He groaned, body flailing a bit. You sighed heavily. His mother told you once that the dead would wake up before she would be able to wake up Jisung in the morning. You could see why she said that now.

“Five more minutes, please?” He pouted in his sleep. The morning sun in its dusty blue haze was starting to peek through the curtains, you needed all the daylight you could afford. 

“No. Get up!” You smacked his chest right over his nipple and he jolted up with a yelp, hitting his head on the ledge of your nightstand. He knocked your lamp over, making it fall to the ground with a hard thud.

“Ow! Why, Y/n?” His pout deepened as he rubbed his head. He looked at you like you’d told him you no longer wanted to be friends. Maybe it was part of his sadness from yesterday that was seeping into the look he was giving you. You didn’t know, but you also didn’t like it. You never wanted him to be sad. To you, he deserved nothing but unadulterated joy. You thought he looked the most handsome when he smiled and nothing else should ever be painted across his lips.

His other hand moved to the spot you smacked, rubbing it while still rubbing the spot on his head. You snorted as you took in the sight, but quickly covered it with concern, seeing that he really was in pain. “I- I'm sorry Ji, I didn't mean to startle you. I just need you up so we can get started. Let me see, yeah?” You moved his hand and inspected the area that had hit your side table. You couldn't see any significant damage past his hair. You kissed the general area. “There. All better?” 

His face heated up, immediately. His thoughts rushed to anything impure he could think of at the moment. He couldn’t help that he was touched starved. He hadn’t had any action since his ex-boyfriend, Minho, graduated over a year ago. Plus, he hadn’t quite come to terms with his new found -okay, maybe they weren’t new and he’s loved you since he first met you,- feelings. Jisung kept his head turned away from you, afraid you'd see the blush that had tinted his cheeks.

“Mhm.” He nodded. Keeping his response simple. He didn’t want you to see his face and use that big brain of yours to figure out just what thoughts plagued his mind about you.

“Well come on, let's get dressed and eat so we can find you some place to stay for a while.” 

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Your mother had been a real estate agent for the past twenty years. She was one of the highest grossing real estate agents in the state. Her vacant properties -which she had plenty of- were what you were going to start with. You'd have to pay extra careful attention to what ones hadn't been looked at in a while and make sure to keep whichever one you settled on that way. “What about that one?” Jisung pointed to a listing of a single family home that was a town over.

“Neighbors would notice. You wouldn't want to be arrested for squatting. I’m sure your dad would love that.” You kept scrolling as he looked over your shoulder, leaning on his hand that was on your arm rests. “It needs to be some place close enough to where I could get to you in case of emergencies, but far enough away from others so they won’t be suspicious.” You chewed on your lip. 

Jisung tried to keep his eyes to himself, but something about the way you looked when you were in full concentration always made his heart flutter. He sighed wistfully. Before all of this happened, he had plans to ask you to be his date to prom. He hoped that if the night turned out well, that he would ask you to be his girlfriend. But he went and fucked things up. His dad did always say he was a good for nothing fuck up. Maybe there was a bit of harsh truth in his words.

“Oh just be honest with yourself, you'd miss me too much if I went too far away.” He chuckled, clearing out his dark thoughts with a joke. Little did he know, he was right. In the four years you'd gotten to spend time with him, even vacations away from each other seemed like torture. Your mother commented once that she'd,

‘Never seen two people who weren't in love, be so attached at the hip. You can’t find one without the other.’ You supposed she was right. A bond like the one you and Jisung had was rare. You considered him your soulmate, your person. So, no, you didn't want him to be too far away. You honestly didn't think you'd be able to handle that. It’s also a part of the reason you were afraid to open any of the letters you’d received from prospective universities. You wanted to stay close to home, but your parents insisted you leave the state, to do and see more. You thought you’d seen enough through traveling and would be just fine close to home and Jisung.

“Don't flatter yourself.” You rolled your eyes to sell the act you were putting on. “Someone has to keep you out of trouble.” 

He scoffed, “Your delusions are getting worse each day. You do realize you're like zero for three at this point, right? I got arrested, expelled, and I'm homeless, and that's all from one day!” You rolled your eyes so hard it was surprising they didn't just roll out of your head.

“How is that my fault? Before the protest I told you to talk to the headmaster to get permission or at least someone on faculty to let them know, but you didn't. You could have talked to the civics teacher, I'm sure she would have happily let us protest. Then when asked to disband, you laid into things harder as if the lack of permission wasn't bad enough. It was for a good cause, yes, but you have to know your limits. You cuffed yourself to the door, Jisung. Like, Seriously?! Then you resisted arrest… I have no words to express how stupid that was. So it's no wonder you got expelled, you broke multiple school rules and managed to get arrested, again.” 

You shook your head. You weren’t disappointed in him, you’d leave that to his father. But you did feel he could have gone about things a little differently. “You didn't even bother telling me that you were running away. We could have planned for this. I could have done something to help before you packed your bags. Least you could have done is let me pick you up.” His arms moved from the arm rest to wrap around you. 

He knew he had you worried, just by the way your eyes looked when you came outside. But his mind was in disarray last night. As soon as he walked in parents house yesterday afternoon he could feel all of what was going to come down on him when his father came home. It was like his mind's eye was open and he could see the immediate future. Said future was telling him he needed to run. That he needed to get out of there before his life ended in that stupid house.

“You can be so annoyingly right sometimes. But it wouldn't be very punk of me if I took the easy way out. Plus, arrest records give me street cred.” You sighed heavily and pushed him away. You couldn’t deal with his strange ideologies right now, you were trying to prevent him from being a common, unhoused, delinquent.

“You're an Idiot.” You mumbled under your breath. You didn't really mean it though. Yes, Jisung made brash, spur of the moment decisions. Yes, they resulted in him being in trouble more often than not. But, Jisung was far from an idiot. Really, he bordered the lines of being a genius. At least to you. He was honestly one of the most sincere and compassionate people you'd ever met. Plus his talent for writing, music, drawing, hell anything he put his mind to creatively, was unmatched. Just don't ask him to play sports. Now, that's when he seemed like an idiot.

“This is it!! Ji, look!” You pointed to the screen, shaking the monitor just from the force. 

“Is that… a van?” You could hear the disgust in his voice, you didn’t even have to look at his face to know his feelings. “You want me to… live in a van?” He grabbed the mouse, scrolling down the page. “There has got to be something… better… right?” It seemed like that was the last property with an actual structure on it, everything else was just land or warehouses. 

“Would you rather a tarp and a cardboard box? Because that might be your only other option.” You quickly pointed out, taking the mouse back from him. “I’m sure one of these vacant warehouses can house you. That is, if you are willing to share your space with roaches, rats, and other creepy crawlies.” He flailed at your words, throwing a small tantrum. 

“Why~ Y/n? Can't I just… stay in your basement or attic or something?” He flopped on your mom's office sofa, still kicking around.

“Because, if my father finds you, He’ll end your life and you know it.” Jisung shuddered at the thought. Your father tolerated him, he always had. He understood that the two of you were friends, but if anything other than friendship happened to spark, he’d flip. He was the type of man that thought his daughter should “preserve her innocence until marriage.” So, that meant he was constantly breathing down your throat about promiscuity and how you should wait. 

That boys, especially ones like Jisung, were not worth your time. He had even had ideal suitors lined up for you to meet during your eighteenth birthday. Someone from a good home with a promising future. Not a homeless dreamer that got expelled from school and ran away from home. To your father, the man for you could never be Jisung, and he had made that known to the both of you in one way or another.

“And he knows exactly what to give me to kill me too. He probably would donate my body to the med school too, just for good measure.” Jisung shuddered at the thought. “Damn it, I hate when you're right.” Your father petrified him. You didn't know this, and he planned on never telling you that your father threatened him the first time they met. Not the first time you introduced them, but the first time they met at the resort. 

Your father had followed you, to make sure you weren't up to anything questionable with the boy you grew so fond of so quickly. He observed from afar, until Jisung got up to use the bathroom. The man towered over the boy, his imposing figure casting a large shadow over him.

“Listen here. That girl that you're chatting up, that's my baby. And as my baby, she gets the benefit of the doubt, you on the other hand, do not. If you're thinking about having sex with my daughter, think twice.” He leaned in, getting down to Jisung's level. 

“I have friends in high and low places. If I wanted to make you disappear, all it would take is a snap of my fingers and poof, you're gone. If you lay a hand on my baby, I'll make sure that's the last time you touch anything with it at all.” It seemed that with every word he spoke he backed him further and further towards the wall, until his back finally hit it. “Keep your hands and your dick to yourself. Understand me?” Jisung nodded slowly, afraid any other action would piss your dad off. “Good.” He patted the boy's shoulder. “Now, hurry up and get back to her. You don't want to keep her waiting for too long, now do you?” Jisung felt like he couldn’t breathe until your father disappeared from his vision. He slid to the ground once the man was gone. That was the day he was glad he had a strong bladder.

So, there was no way in hell he'd be caught here. He didn't want to end up in a ditch somewhere, rotting or worse, he had dreams to fulfill. “Let me see if the lights and water are in my mom's name for this property…” You murmured under your breath. “She doesn't check when small amounts come out of her account. So, as long as you keep your usage low, you should be fine there.” Jisung sat up to look at you, now that his little tantrum was finally over.

All of his thoughts about your father had ceased. Now all he could think about was his fear of losing you. To wake up and not be able to hear your voice, or see your face. How could he survive the wild without you? “Will you come visit me?” You stopped clicking around once you heard the sadness in his voice. You quickly turned around in the office chair to face him. 

“Why would you ask a stupid question like that? You know I will. You living in a weird van can't keep me away. Even if it looks like you’d kidnap children in it.” He laughed at that, your joke lifting his spirits a little. “Now, if you were living in a cardboard box, you might not see me as much.” He kissed his teeth this time, only for you to laugh.

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“How much further is it?” Jisung asked, trailing behind you. You had to ditch the car, the trail was too narrow and overgrown for you to drive it. He hated walking long distances almost as much as he hated running. He was one of the few people who failed physical education, much to the coach's chagrin. They had stated previously that he had the potential to be a great track star. Yeah, that wasn’t remotely the kind of star he wanted to be.

“I think it's just up ahead, there is supposed to be a clearing…” Jisung had his bag and the guitar he had at your house for safekeeping. The one he had at home had been tossed out onto the drive from a second story window. You had a boatload of cleaning supplies, including a mop, bucket, and broom. This place had been abandoned for over a year and a half now, it had to be gross on the inside. 

You could hear him sputtering behind you as he swatted away bugs. “There was no way you could have survived on the outside.” You mumbled, shaking your head. If you were honest, both of you were spoiled little rich kids. Neither of you could survive, especially not without the other. “There!” You couldn't calm the excitement you felt as you saw the silhouette of the van through the trees.

“Fina-fucking-ly.” Jisung huffed, ready to at least take a seat and rehydrate himself. But you had other plans. You opened the van door, the smell of hot air whooshed past you. The pocket door revealed the small kitchen. A sink, floor to ceiling pantry and a counter with a hotplate on top and a mini fridge underneath. You climbed in first.

“This isn't as bad as I thought it would be. At least you have the basic amenities.” You nodded, crawling around on your knees, unaware that Jisung was still standing outside. Apprehension had started creeping its way into Jisung’s subconscious. All the what if's seemingly flying at him all at once. 

“What if you fail? Do you really think she’ll remain friends with a loser that is also a failure?” “What happens when you are here in the dark by yourself?” “What if no one likes your music?” “What if she finds someone else that makes her happier than you do?” “What happens when one of those picks that her father likes sweeps her off her feet? What happens to you then?”

“I don't think I can do this.” He turned on his heels, ready to head back to the car. 

“Ji, wait!” You quickly exited the van to give chase, he had barely made it back to the tree line before you stopped him. His face was red, both from the heat of walking and also from him trying his best to hold back his tears. Maybe he jumped the gun running away from home. He only had two or three months left before graduation, he could have made it that long. But here he was, in the middle of the woods, looking at an abandoned van as prospective housing. 

“If you give up now, you might as well give up on your dreams. Going back home means all of this was for nothing. You might as well throw away all the sheet music and demos you’ve made and go ahead and pick up the law books he was forcing you to read, because you will never do music again if you go back now. Do you want to let your dad win?” He stopped dead In his tracks. Leaving now did mean he was giving up. Going back home to a father that thought of him as nothing but a useless loser was not an option. It might be hard to tough it out, but it wasn’t anything he couldn't get used to. 

He sighed heavily, shoulders drooping with the harsh exhale of breath. “God, I hate that you're always right.” You chuckled. “But, I love it at the same time.” He turned to face you, taken back by the ethereal glow the backdrop of the clearing gave you. You looked otherworldly, a type of beauty that he could never fully wrap his head around. You were the type of person people wrote songs about. He wouldn’t admit it to you, but he was one of those said people. He stood there like he wanted to say something, but he just shook his head, letting the thought go. “You have to promise to come see me often. I… I can't do this alone.” You smiled brightly and he reciprocated. How could he not? To him, you had the most radiant smile. 

“Wouldn't have it any other way.” You reached for him, pulling him into a tight hug. “I'll always have your back.”

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Loneliness. That's what he expected to feel out on his own. His first night was full of it. Every little creek and bump in the night caused him to stir. Afraid that a random serial killer would happen upon his trailer and brutally kill him. Truth was, he just watched too many horror films, October wasn’t that long ago after all. Plus, the two of you loved to break tradition and watch horror and thriller in place of cheesy Christmas love stories where there was always a small town guy and a big city girl who fight their differences to fall in love with each other, while simultaneously saving the town's failing get-together spot. It was always the same trope in a different font and you both hated it. 

When a particularly loud sound pulled him from his sleep, his immediate response was to call you. He’d had enough run-ins with the cops to know not to call them when he was squatting on some middle of nowhere abandoned property. He knew that your soothing voice would be the one thing that would calm him down. It was the only thing that made him feel safe. Just hearing your voice would save him from drowning or bring him back from the brink of death.

“Mhm.” Even with just a hum he knew you had been in a deep slumber. It hadn’t even been the blaring ringtone that woke you up, it was the bright screen of Jisung doing his happy dance after trying the cheesecake you made him for his last birthday.

“Will you stay on the phone with me? It's… Kind of scary out here by myself.” He could hear you shuffling, before settling. Jisung was used to being alone; between his parents traveling for work and his brother being away, loneliness was a constant for the boy. But he knew you were always a phone call away. You’d never failed to answer his call, even if you were asleep or busy; you always made time for him.

“Have you been to sleep, Ji? It's like after four.” Your speech was still slurred, but he found it comforting.

“Yeah. But I keep hearing things.” He played with the fringe on one of the throw pillows you'd lifted from your parents' guest house.

“Want me to sing our song?” He knew you hated to sing, you felt that you couldn't. But he liked for you to sing to him, just for him. Felt like a warm embrace. Your voice was sweet and angelic.

“Please?” You chuckled softly.

Clearing your throat, you started to sing. “Wherever you are, I'll always make you smile.

"Wherever you are, I'm always by your side. Whatever you say, you're always on my mind. I promise you "forever" right now.”

He could feel himself sinking into the mattress underneath him. The worries of the day mentally melting off of him with each word you sang. You were his comfort. He closed his eyes as you continued to sing.

“Someone I can love from my heart. Someone I love from the bottom of my heart. In the center of this love. You are my heart…” 

You paused, hearing the light snoring through the receiver. You couldn't help the sleepy smile that spread over your face. “Goodnight, Ji. Love you.” You hung the phone up quickly, missing his sleep riddled reply.

“I love you too, Y/n.”

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The weeks passed by slowly, turning into months. You meant it when you said you’d visit. You were over at Jisung’s place almost every day. Even when things got a little hectic in your schedule you still made time for him. He appreciated that, he really did. But something was off with you. He felt it deep down, every time you canceled on him, or changed the subject when all he asked was a simple question. You were keeping something from him and it wasn’t anything small either. 

Jisung was sitting on the floor of his van, feet dangling out of the open sliding door, plucking at his guitar. There wasn’t much inspiration flowing as of late. Not when his mind was occupied with you and the secret you were keeping from him. He wanted to know, just wanted to come right out and ask you what you were hiding. But he knew if he was going to ask, he needed to do it gently. You’d shut down if he forced you to tell him what was up. He was so preoccupied with his thoughts he didn’t see you come out of the clearing. Not even the dry grass crunching under your sandals could pull him from deep within his thoughts.

“Ji, I think your ears are smoking. You okay?” The sound of your voice snapped him out of it. His fingers stopped what they were doing and he sat up. 

“Huh? My what are what-ing?” He moved his hand to his ear, feeling for whatever substance you said was coming out his ear, only to realize you were joking. He chuckled. “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be out celebrating?” His class graduated today. Instead of being out, celebrating with you and taking pictures of this great day, he was stuck in his van. Barred from coming within fifty feet of the school. 

“Are you dumb? What kind of celebration would it be if you weren’t with me?” You pulled your hand that he hadn’t realized you were hiding until you flashed your diploma. “I’m free… from well.. High School.” You chuckled. “Those last few months were tough without you, Ji. I had no one to talk to.” You sighed, but his only response was to hum.

The tension had built up in his head, his intrusive thoughts winning the ongoing battle in his head. “What are you hiding from me?” He spoke suddenly, not even bothering to look in your eyes as he asked. 

You shook the diploma cover you held in your hand, “My diploma. Is… is everything alright, Ji?” You looked at him confused. Chalking it up to maybe he’d been out here too long by himself. It had been two days since the last time you were by, you just couldn’t free up time.

“No, it’s not alright. You have been acting strange for the last month or so.” He sat his guitar down and jumped down out of the van, coming face to face with you. “You know you can trust me, so, why are you hiding something from me?” 

You thought you’d been acting normal. Trying to keep those feelings of betrayal from seeping out of your pores like bottom shelf liquor. “I…” He was right, you had been hiding something, from the fear of feeling like you’d lose him if you told him the truth. 

He sighed, frustration taking over his expression. Being a forced recluse had taken its toll on Jisung. Jisung might have had most of the things a person with an actual apartment had. He had a kitchen, albeit a small one. He had a place to sleep, and a makeshift living room. He had a sink and could go pee outside, plus a hose to hose down with in place of showers.. He had to walk a few miles to the local gym to handle other things like real grooming, so his hard on his face and the top of his head had grown out tremendously. Not to mention places you hadn’t seen.

Jisung had gotten a job in town, and used you as a reference. Now he worked the night shift at a gas station. It gave him something to do in the meantime, to help him save up to move somewhere other than this ultra conservative little town so he could pursue his dream. He had always hoped you’d get accepted somewhere cool so he could tag along and get some gigs. He always wanted to be wherever you were.

“Please, just tell me the truth.” His voice was soft. He just wanted to know the truth.

You sighed, eyes focused on the diploma in your hand. “I’m leaving.” You spoke, but you stayed planted in your spot. Jisung looked at you confused. 

“Now? Or…”

“Right before school starts. I… I got accepted into the university of my dreams…. Ji…” The sadness in your voice was palpable. The excitement hit him before the realization hit. You’d been talking about where you really wanted to go if you ever got the chance. It was in a different country, halfway across the globe. You were leaving. For real.

He took a moment. He didn’t want to seem bitter that you were leaving him. But, you were leaving him. His rock was leaving him to float away. You kept his mind grounded, what was he going to do with you gone?

“I.. I’ve been afraid to tell you. I wanted to tell you in my own way, whenever I was ready. But… It never seemed like a good time.” You were picking at a loose string on the hand stitched leather cover.

It felt like an eternity before Jisung spoke again. “You’re leaving… for uni?” You looked up, alarmed by his voice which was devoid of any type of feeling.

"What happened to us sticking together? Staying close to each other?" He frowned, "So.. you're leaving m-..?" He paused, but quickly corrected himself. "You are leaving Rutherglen?"

“Yes, in a few months.” You nodded, hoping that if you explained you had time before you went it would help him to process it better.

He was trying his best to keep all of his emotions from spilling out like an over boiling pot, but he couldn’t keep it in. “How long have you known?” 

Your brows creased into a frown. “How long have I known that I wanted to go there? You know the answer-”

He stopped you mid-sentence. “How long have you known that you were leaving? How long have you known that you were leaving me behind?” His voice came out calm, but it was the type of calm that led to murders.

“Ji- I- don't know. I just.. I wanted to tell you but I was afraid of how to say it-”

“How long?!” He snapped, scaring the both of you. You’d never witness this side of him. The shade of anger almost reminded you of his father. “Y/n.. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean-”

You cut him off this time. “A month.” You spoke matter-of-factly. “I got the letter a month ago and I’ve been riddled with anxiety while trying to figure out how to tell you. You know this is all I ever wanted and I-”

You felt the wind get knocked out of you before you could finish your sentence. “Go.” You stopped speaking as the cold word left your best friend's mouth. “I don’t need you to stay here for my sake. I’ll be just fine by myself.” He didn’t believe the words coming out of his own mouth, but somehow, you did. You took a few steps back away from him.

He didn’t dare look at your face, too afraid it would break his heart and make it even harder to say goodbye.

He had to let you go. He knew that and you knew that. All he would be doing is holding you back if he tried to convince you to stay closer to him. He knew this was your dream and he needed to support that. Because all you ever did was support him. He felt it was finally his turn to do the same for you.

If he didn’t let go now, he definitely wouldn’t be able to a few months from now. If he didn’t rip the Band-Aid off now, the wound would never heal. “Just fucking go.” He wanted to congratulate you, tell you just how good you did. That despite all of the hurdles you faced you still came out on top. You deserved to be celebrated. But he couldn’t do that with you, not right now. Not when he was on the verge of ripping his own heart out. He let his long bangs cover his eyes so you wouldn’t look into them and see the immediate regret they held. “Why are you still standing here? GO!” 

You swallowed the enormous lump in your throat. He wouldn’t get your tears, he didn’t deserve them. You couldn’t wrap your head around why he was so upset. You wanted to tell him, you really did. But how do you go about telling your best friend that you won't be able to see them again until some miscellaneous holiday? If that. Your family had money, but you doubt they would even care enough to fly you back and forth, especially if it was just to see some boy.

“Ji, I’m sorry I wanted to-” He stopped you before you could finish by getting in the van and shutting the door right in your face. He could show you better than he could tell you that he wanted you gone. You sucked in a deep breath and turned your back on the van. It took everything in you not to turn around, you didn’t want to say goodbye, especially not like this. Jisung on the other hand, only pretended to let his anger get the best of him. He retreated to his bed as soon as the door closed. He watched silently as your back disappeared into the brush. The sadness took over as soon as he couldn’t see your back anymore. 

This was the end of the best thing he’d ever had. The closest thing he’d ever felt was close to true unconditional love.

The passage of time is a funny thing. One moment you are crying your eyes out because what you thought was your person turned their back on you. Then you traveled halfway across the world to get your degree and ended up spending four more years in another place to get your doctorate. Now you are sitting at your younger brother’s wedding rehearsal. Just who gets married at the ripe age of twenty-two? He just got the hang of legal drinking, for Christ's sake. When did he even get this big? 

Things were hectic, especially considering you were his “best man”, like he didn’t have a male friend to fill the role. You would have been perfectly fine just sitting out with your parents as a bystander. Thankfully you were pretty familiar with his friends and his soon to be husband. Plus you knew the ins and outs of his life, even if you didn’t want to. He said he trusted you more than anyone, that's why he picked you. You couldn’t say no to that, even if you desperately wanted to. 

The wedding was beautiful. His family also came from money, so they spared no expense to make sure that their ‘Lovely boy”, as they affectionately called him, got everything he wanted. That included a destination all the way in lovely Spain, Ibiza to be exact. Your parents paid for the reception, and of course, married or not, no one was going to outdo them when it came to their favorite child. They rented out a whole hotel with beautiful vistas of the Ibizan coastline. Your brother also wanted them to pay for Beyonce to come and perform, but they quickly shot that down, which you found funny. Instead He asked for another artist, one that his now husband seemed to love.

You had just finished taking a picture with the wedding party, successfully embarrassing your little brother with a big kiss on the cheek in the last photo. You couldn’t be happier for his happiness. He pulled you to the side, as the others gathered to make their entrance to the reception. “Sis, I couldn’t thank you enough for all you've done for me.” He put a hand on your shoulder, looking down at you with your mothers smile. Seriously, when did he get so big? “I know things haven't always been smooth sailing between us. I didn’t have nearly as many things to overcome, being that I'm the baby and mom's favorite after all.” He laughed and you playfully scowled. 

“But, I recognize, and I'm thankful for every sacrifice you've made as my older sibling. Without your encouragement I would have never gone to law school, which means I would have never met the love of my life. I'd still be miserable trying to remember all the fucking funky ass medical terms.” You laughed at that, the boy was struggling. He wanted to follow in your fathers footsteps, just to make him proud. But you’d convinced him that he could make him proud just by being himself and succeeding in something he actually loved. It turned out you were right, but when weren’t you? “I needed you to tell me to find something that made me happy. So, my question to you now is, are you happy, sis?” He slid his hand from your shoulder into yours. “I don’t mean with work, we all know you love your job. Dr. Y/L/n.” You smiled, but you didn’t answer the question immediately.

For years now, it felt as if something was missing from your life. But you couldn’t quite pinpoint what it was. You’d been in a few relationships since you’d left Rutherglen, you’d even been engaged. You’d made friends along the way, some you were even still close to. But for the most part, nothing ever felt worth the effort to keep. Maybe it was the trauma you’d felt from all of your failed high school relationships that found a way to creep into the ones you’ve tried to make. Maybe it was just some weird void left there by the person you thought was your person. Who knows? But, you were alone. But you didn’t feel like you were lonely, per-se. You filled whatever deep well of emptiness with traveling and good food. 

Your brother gave you a look and it caused you to sigh. “I’m good. This is you and Liam’s day, Aaron. I know you want to save the world and all, but you can’t solve all my problems. At least, not today anyway.” You chuckled. It was sweet that he was concerned about you, it really was. But, you’d been trying to deal with whatever this hole was for over eight years now. You found that it was either something that you get used to, or you try to fill. You just decided to get used to it. There was no use in trying to fill the black hole left in your heart by-

“It’s time to head in, you two.” The wedding planner snapped you out of your thoughts. You smiled up at your younger brother before tugging him along to join the rest of the wedding party.

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“Thank you, Manchester!” The crowd roared as Jisung threw his sweaty and torn tee-shirt out into the pit of fans. He and his band Mortal Savages were promoting their latest album, Awkward Example, on tour. This was the last stop on the European leg of the junket, after they had toured the world. He rushed off stage as the throng of fans started to get rowdier than they already were. A small mosh pit was starting to form in the middle and he honestly wanted no parts of that. Last time they waited around while that happened, he lost a tooth and ended up with a concussion and a busted guitar. 

His assistant handed him a bottle of water as he exited the stage. “Your flight is in two hours, Mr. Han. I have arranged a private car to pick you up from your hotel and take you to the airport.” Jisung nodded, listening idly. He just wanted to unwind, before heading to this small gig he and the rest of his band had been booked for. If it wasn’t for this being a special request of a friend of a friend, he’d be headed right back to Seoul with his band.

See, Jisung had made quite a name for himself over the past eight years. After he pushed you out of his life, he picked up the pieces as best he could. Using your exit as motivation. He hoped that you wouldn’t hate him forever, that one day the two of you would reunite. But in case you didn’t, he wanted to use the little bit of light you’d shone in his life to really make something of himself. He started small, busking a few towns over in a big city.

That landed him a few gigs here and there like weddings and bar mitzvahs. As much fun as those were, he had bigger dreams. He started to post short covers on tik tok and things kind of picked up from there. He was recognized by an artist that wanted to start his own label and the rest was history. He’d found his people. He put together his own band from some people he’d met in circles while touring by himself. People who had small fanbases, but great potential. 

Hyunjin, his bassist, was a model. He played bass in his free time and had a few videos posted on his insta account of him playing. He was suggested to him by a secretary at the company. Okay, maybe suggested was a strong word. She had a crush on the bassist, so it was only natural that she suggested Jisung look into him. He did, and he loved his style. Hyunjin introduced him to Felix, his closest friend, a twitch gamer that just so happened to know how to play guitar, and had a pretty surprising set of vocal cords on him. It was only natural he asked him to join the group. 

He found Jeongin in a jazz bar of all places. The kid was a classically trained pianist whose one act of rebellion was to play jazz. Jazz. As surprising as it was, it is what almost got him disowned by his family. Jisung convinced him that if he really wanted to make his parents mad, he should try rock. Turns out, Jeongin’s dad really liked rock music.

Despite him trying to anger his parents, he actually made them proud. Go figure. All he needed to round out the group was a drummer. He found his drummer, an Aussie, on youtube, doing shirtless rock remixes of popular r&b and pop songs. The dude was so undeniably cool he called his manager that night to ask him to find this dude. By the time he woke up the next morning, Chris was on a plane to see him. 

They somehow all clicked, becoming a band of brothers in a matter of months. He couldn’t see his life without these guys now. Jisung was relieved when the door closed behind him in the dressing room. He needed to tune out all of the noise. He hated being alone with his thoughts, they seemed overwhelming at times, but after a set, it seemed to be the one thing that comforted him. He flopped in a chair, directly in front of a vanity, taking in his reflection. 

So many things have changed over the years. He changed his hair a few times, it went from short to long and back again. He recently grew it out, opting to keep the long hair, figuring it stopped his face from looking so youthful and chubby. He'd dyed it several times, but it was currently back to his regular dark brown. His previously unmarred skin was now littered with various tattoos with different meanings and reasons behind them.

Most of them remind him of his past, both the good and bad. Without those moments, he wouldn’t be who he was today. He ran his fingers through his damp fringe, sighing. He had no time to reminisce about ancient history, he had somewhere to be in a few hours and needed to gather his strength to get there. Jisung pushed himself up with a heave-ho and gathered up his things.

It was a quick ride back to the hotel. There were a few fans and reporters posted outside. It was just the ones who had figured out he and his band mates were staying there. His anxiety started to kick in the moment he started to see the flashes of cameras as the car came to a halt in the drop off area. He almost asked his assistant to go get his things, that he’s take care of his personal hygiene when they got to their destination.

But he group mates were already shuffling out of the SUV before he could get his bearings. Jisung felt like he was in a trance, his body moving on auto pilot. The sound had cut out, all he could hear was muffled shouting and the incessant humming noise. His face was blank, gone with any thoughts that he had in his head. There was just this tiny voice in his head telling him, “You got this, Ji.” It sounded an awful lot like his old friend. But it had been eight years and the sound of her voice was something he had long ago forgotten, no matter how hard he tried to hold on to the memory of it.

There were times when he thought he might forget her face, but social media was a constant reminder of it. It wasn’t like he was stalking her or anything . Okay, maybe he was. But it was only just a little bit. He just wanted to know if she was doing well. If she’d gotten married, or made any big life changes. She’d changed a lot too. Her style had changed, as well as her hair a few times. But the thing that stayed the same was her smile. It was the thought of her smile that kept his feet moving as he made his way into the hotel. The sound came back in as the cool air of the hotel lobby hit his face. He breathed a sigh of relief. Thankful he didn’t have another episode like he did a couple weeks ago. He fainted from anxiety and it made front page news, much to his chagrin.

“Alright, everyone go get your things. We will meet back here in forty-five.” His manager spoke after rounding up the band and their staff. It wasn’t much time, but he was glad he’d get at least a few minutes to himself before heading out again into the sea of people waiting for him. The elevator ride up to their floor was filled with eventful conversations between the members and the few staff that took the ride up with them. Jisung would throw a smile or a nod around occasionally, but was otherwise disengaged. His mind was filled with thoughts about his family. How his brother and his wife had welcomed their second child, a little boy with round chubby cheeks just like his uncle. He hoped that his brother would be a better father to the second born child than their father was to him. 

Even though they had since then made up. Jisung knew it was only due to him being a ‘success’, rather than his father truly being sorry for all of the pain he’d caused him. It took a lot of therapy and lyric writing for him to even be remotely open to talking to his father. If it wasn’t for mis mother practically begging him to forgive the man, he would have never even considered it. Turns out that the youth vote can be boosted when your son is a super popular rockstar. Just have said rockstar pose in a few pictures with the mayoral candidate with the same name, and your political career might take off.

He didn’t fault his father for it. He'd worked hard to get his career to that point. There was nothing wrong with booting your votes with a pretty well-known artist. Especially when that artist is your child. His father actually sat him down amidst their reunion and told him that the only reason he treated him like that was because he saw too much of himself in him. That he once had aspirations to be a rock star, that he almost made it. Him and his band had signed a record deal and everything. But things fell through and they ended up having to pay back the company for the debt they had incurred. He just didn’t want that life for his son. He also admitted that he may have gone about things the wrong way, not recognizing the same stubbornness in his son that he once had.

The ding of the elevator brought Jisung out of his thoughts. He separated from his members as he pushed his door open after using the keycard to get in. He was back to his thoughts, now his brain now blotted with thoughts of you. He missed you, dearly. How your lips curled when you smiled. How your hair smelled when you hugged him in the mornings before class. How your sleepy voice sounded. How out of everyone, you gave him the most strength to make it day to day. How a chance encounter was the reason you two became friends in the first place. Even down to how you were his person. 

Even years after seeing you last, you were still his person. He had a feeling you would always be. Countless hit records were written about you and he'd keep writing about you until he couldn't write anymore. His muse. His first true love. His person. The lov- “Aren’t you Han? From Mortal Savages?” His door barely clicked open when he heard the high pitched vocal fry of what he assumed was one of his fans. He sighed. If he hadn’t been caught up in his thoughts maybe he would have seen her and possibly avoided all of this. He quickly closed the door, knowing all too well how some fans could be and he didn’t want to take that chance.

He turned to her with a smile. “Yeah. What can I do for you, beautiful?” He’d learned from Chris that sometimes you had to pacify the fans with a compliment, make them feel special. It made them come back.

Her eyes lit up at the compliment. “I- I was hoping… you might invite me in.” Jisung tried his best to keep his face neutral. “I’m your biggest fan, a-and I wanted to show you just how much I love you.” Stealthily he turned on his camera to record this incident, sometimes you had to be careful with delicate situations like this. He didn’t want his career to end over a ‘he said, she said’ situation. 

He sighed again, “Look, you seem like a nice person, but I’m really tired and I don’t have much time. I have another gig to get t-”

“But your schedule says it’s clear..” She pulled out her phone to provide the evidence. 

“It’s a private event, that's why it isn’t on there.” He nodded, “I really need to get packed up so that I don’t miss my plane.” She took the opportunity to step closer to him.

“I promise I’ll make it worth your while!” She got a little louder, alarming the man even further.

“N-no thank you.” He spoke nervously. He’d had industry friends say that this happened to them all of the time, but this was a first for him. He stepped back, back hitting the door to his room. 

“I’ll be really good for you, Ji.” She pressed her body against his. Calling out the nickname that no one, but you called him. You were the only one allowed to call him that. It was either his last, first, or his full name. It didn’t have the same endearing ring when others said it. He hated how it sounded falling from other people's lips.

“Wh-what did you call me?” He stared at her blankly.

“Ji.” She smiled wide as if she had accomplished something. “I thought it was cute. Everyone else calls you Han or Jisung, so I thought it’d be nice to call you something I came up with on my own.”

The anger was rolling off Jisung in waves, like magma slowly building towards becoming erupted lava. His face stayed calm as he spoke, but every word was pointed. “Don’t ever call me that again. It’s not for you to come up with different names for me. It’s Jisung, not Ji to you. Understand?” She nodded, getting the underlined hint that he was angry. He didn’t even sound like himself.

“Now, like I said… I have somewhere to be and you are holding me up. If you want a picture or an autograph I can give that to you, but I can’t give you anything else.” She took the opportunity to get the picture, but he was sure she was going to write some whack ass caption like, “Don’t meet your idols.” Or some shit like that. He didn’t have the capacity or strength to care at the moment, he had places to be.

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Jisung was often praised for how quickly he could go to sleep. Not many people had that skill, plus the ability to sleep anywhere and not be disturbed by the loud noise surrounding him. But his alleged gift did not come in handy on the flight from Manchester to their private booking two hours and some change away. As a matter of fact, that usual gift seemed like a deterrence. He fell asleep as soon as they got on the plane, but ten minutes later he was wide awake again. He tried his best to get some rest before they touched down, but nothing helped. He counted sheep and took a swig of liquor, he even tried a sleep aid, but here he was, looking out the window as the plane touched down. It had to be his luck, right? Something was off in the universe or something. Because why was his scale tipping towards all this bad will?

Even after arriving and settling into his hotel room, sleep just would not come to him. The hours ticked by. He tried at first to see if he laid in the bed long enough if sleep would still elude him, it did. He tried to gather some inspiration, maybe pen something fantastic about not being able to sleep, the inspiration never came. So as the sun slowly started to creep over the horizon, he decided to take a walk. The beautiful vistas around this hotel were captivating, so hopefully they would provide him with both inspiration and clarity. He stood near the cliff and watched the sunrise, not noticing the woman a few yards away from him, taking in the same views. He was about to leave, hoping that seeing the sun would finally put him to sleep when he noticed something about her. The briny scent of the sea mixed with her scent and just like a care package, the breeze sent it right into his nostrils. 

Every muscle and nerve in his body froze with the familiar scent. But there was just no way. Right? His father asked him to do this favor, saying this was his wedding gift to the son of a family friend. But it never occurred to him that your family were the aforementioned family friends. His body ached to call out to you, run to you, but his mind kept him in the same position. With good reason apparently. You were joined a moment later, a man around your age coming behind you, wrapping a blanket around your shoulders before taking up the spot right next to you. Was that your boyfriend? His anxiety started to bubble in the center of his chest, his heart felt shaky. He knew a day like this would come, when he would have to face you once more. Make amends with how he broke your heart. But he never expected it to be on your family trip. He didn’t expect to meet you again in the same manner he met you the first time. Meeting somewhere tropical with your family somewhere nearby. Now he had to add in a boyfriend to the mix.

His head was starting to pound, he needed to sleep. He needed his heart to stop beating so rapidly in his chest. He needed to call this all off and head back to the comfort of his own home, to get away from the madness. “Jisung, what are you doing out here?” His eyes widened, hearing his name being called. He turned around to see his manager, dressed in his workout gear, just having come from a run. In a panic, Jisung quickly pulled the man away from the scene, hoping you hadn’t heard. Just as he ducked back into the building, you looked around in the spot he was just in, to see no one there.

It took him a while to calm down. He could still see you from his hotel room and it wasn’t helping him one bit. Internet stalking you was bad enough, now he was literally stalking you, watching you from his window like some creep. He was anxious, sleep deprived, and now he had to add scared that he’d truly lost you forever. He looked on at you and your boyfriend, talking animatedly from the window. His arm was around your shoulder, he assumed to keep you warm. Even with the blanket still around you. “What am I going to do?” He was stressed. Hair sticking up all over his head from incessantly running his fingers through it. He couldn't leave, he’d made a promise with his dad to do this in his absence. Plus his mom was somewhere around, she’d been texting him all night about how she couldn’t wait to see her precious baby. He wouldn’t be able to stomach a decision that made her sad when she was clearly so excited.

He wanted to say ‘fuck you’, to being a good son. But at the end of the day he just couldn’t. What if you didn’t recognize him? Or worse. What if you ignored his entire existence? He knew you had every right too, he did push you out of his life just because you’d hidden your acceptance to college from him. Or at least that's what he let you think. He didn’t want to be the reason you didn’t follow your biggest dreams. He flopped on his bed, tired of watching the endless flirtation and touching between you and your supposed boyfriend. He laid in the bed, draping his arm over his eyes to block out the sunlight. “Get a grip, Jisung. It’s just a performance. She’s just a girl. Just do what you came here for and peace out. It’s simple.” At least he hoped that's how things would be. He’d perform, then he and his mom would make their way to Seoul to visit some family. Simple. Easy. Right?

Yeah, things were definitely not that easy. Not for him at least. He eventually fell asleep, just to be woken up by a knock at his door. It was his mother, inviting him to be her date to the wedding. Was he a momma’s boy because he couldn’t deny her this simple task? Maybe, but how could he say no to her? That's how he ended up between his mother and your third cousin, Lilliana, both women talking his ears off as he nodded idly. Luckily the wedding was outdoors, so his sunglasses made a lot of sense. He wasn’t the only one shielding their eyes from the sun's rays. The only reprieve he felt was when the wedding march started. For the most part, the wedding party came in one person at a time. Until it came to the best men, the two of you walked in together, arm in arm. The way he looked at you sunk Jisung’s heart lower than the floor. 

You were stunning, he could understand your boyfriend’s feelings. The way the all red pants suit looked on, put everyone else to shame. Even the way your hair was pinned up, or even how simple but gorgeous your makeup looked, all of the above just complimented your beauty perfectly. He couldn’t pay attention to the actual wedding, his mind and eyes focused on you the whole time. Even if you felt his stare, you didn’t acknowledge it. He was thankful for that. He already felt like a creep from watching you this morning. Even as you walked back down the aisle, he watched you until he couldn’t see your figure anymore.

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Nerves. He stopped getting nervous before shows years ago. But here he was, pacing back and forth, chewing on his already bitten away nails. His members looked on at him, worried. It’d been a while since they’d seen him like this and even though each of them tried their best to comfort him in their own way, nothing seemed to work. The time was ticking down for them to go on stage and the dread in the pit of his stomach was growing exponentially. What if she still hates me? What if she lets everyone know how disgusting of a human being I am for treating her that way? What is this…? What if that…? He was so far into his thoughts it took an actual push from his manager to start walking.  

“Babe, I know how much you love this group and their lead singer's voice. So, using my sister's old connections, I asked his dad if he could get them to perform for our wedding reception.” Aaron spoke, holding up his champagne flute towards his husband. “So, this is Mayor Han’s gift to us for our wedding. Please give a warm round of applause to Mortal Savages!” All of the young people in the crowd went wild, most of them rushing to the dance floor right in front of the stage to get a good view. Aaron hurried to his husband's side to watch the band. But all Jisung could do was look out into the crowd, in hopes of finding you. He felt like a teenager all over again. Transported back to his audience of one. No one else mattered in this moment, not even the grooms who he was here to entertain.

He expected to see anger in your eyes, but instead was met with this inexplicable sadness. “Uh- hi.” Jisung spoke nervously. “It’s been a while since we last played a wedding, but uh- I hope..” He could see your boyfriend whispering something in your ear just for you to shake your head no. It only made him wonder what he asked. “I hope this song reaches someone out there. Because almost every song is written for or about someone. Often it's about the love that got away, other times it’s about the love you feel in the moment. So.. I hope this helps to spread the love that this lovely couple is feeling at this very moment.” He grabbed his guitar, the pick nearly slipping out of his sweaty fingers.

As the song started, he kept his eyes locked on your, not straying away from your saddened yet scrutinizing gaze. 

“지킬게 아파도 돼 네가 흘린 상처들은 감싸 안을게 이미 내게 너는 죄 너는 죄…”

You tore your eyes from him, to focus once more on your boyfriend, giving that man a soft smile. One that was once reserved strictly for Jisung. Most if not all of your smiles once upon a time were because of him, they were for him. Maybe because things were so easy back then he didn’t realize he was taking them for granted, taking you and the love you showed him for granted, platonic or not. Almost as if he couldn’t lose them. To know that the reason you were no longer a constant in his life was all his doing? Felt like a ripping stab to the heart.

“뜨거운 네가 필요해, you are my volcano…”

He was thankful that you let the song end before you excused yourself. Jisung dropped everything, practically chucking his guitar into his manager's hands before running after you. He could hear the confused claps at the reception, he knew he’d have to deal with the consequences of his actions, but those were the last thing on his mind right now. He saw the fabric of your red suit rush to the elevator, but he quickly caught it before the doors closed completely. You sighed loudly, wishing you could have vanished before he found you, but your luck was apparently shit.

“Please.. Just.. hear me out.” He huffed, arms still stretched out at his sides holding the elevator door open. You wanted to tell him no, because what was left to say? He was the one who pushed you out, not the other way around. You owed him nothing. But you gave in anyway. Truth be told, you wanted to hear what excuses he’d make for his past behavior. Because a simple apology wasn’t going to work on you, you needed to know why he pushed you away.

He silently stepped on the elevator with you. The building only had a few floors, so he needed to speak quickly. “I didn’t realize until it was too late that this was your brother's wedding. I hope you don’t think I crashed it on purpose, because that just isn’t the case. I just-”

“Get to the point, Jisung. I don’t have all night to stand in this elevator and talk with you.” You spoke coldly, eyes staring into his murky reflection on the mirrored doors. You wouldn’t even spare him an actual look. He could feel himself getting nervous all over again.

“It’s not an excuse, but in my mind, pushing you away was the best thing for you. I wanted to keep you by my side. But I knew if I selfishly asked you to stay, you would. I also knew that talking with you over the phone or facetime wouldn’t be enough. Especially not when I’d grown used to having you near. Once upon a time, one phone call was all it took and you’d be there, but how could you if you were in another country? I couldn’t deal with even the thought of it. Being able to hear your voice, but not being able to actually bask in your presence- the thought of living like that for four years killed me.” 

You crossed your arms over your chest and rolled your eyes. “But that wasn’t just your decision to make, Ji-” His nickname almost slipped off your tongue, probably a force of habit. “Jisung. We could have figured something out. But you decided our friendship wasn’t worth fighting for. You literally slammed the door in my face. It’s been eight years. Do you think I’m still hung up on how you imploded our friendship on a whim? I’ve moved on. You should too.” Your sentence ended just as the elevator dinged, the old door creaking open. “Congratulations on becoming a success, by the way. I guess me not being around paid off for you.”

Your eyes finally met his, but he didn’t like the look in them. Like you loathed the fact that he was breathing the same air as you. “I can’t.” He spoke, exiting the lift with you. “I can’t move on. I never had any intention to.” He followed after you, even after you dismissed him. You were just trying to get into your room, away from him, away from the noise. But he was persistent. He followed you in. After you didn’t push him out, he continued. 

“Almost every song I’ve written has been about you. For you. I-I hoped that one day you’d see my face on tv or hear my voice on the radio and look me up. I hoped that you’d read my lyrics or my ‘thanks to’ and realize that everything I did was so you could see me. See that I needed to push you away for both of us to grow. I needed the pain to see that my feelings for you were more than whatever platonic bullshit I had reduced them too. I needed that space to understand that what I thought was love with my exes would never compare to the love I have for you. I’ve been in and out of relationships since you walked away from my van and back into the trees and nothing, not even the biggest heartbreak has compared to the feeling of never seeing your face or hearing your voice again.”

You kept your back turned towards him as you listened. You stared out the sliding glass door and glass balcony fence that overlooked the reception area. The party was still going on, everyone was having a good time, despite the lead singer of the band being missing in action. 

“All I’ve wanted this past eight years is for you to understand that I was too dependent on you. I needed to grow up, to man up and I couldn’t do that if you were around. I had to learn to navigate life by myself without you constantly helping me out of every little fuck up. Do you even realize that that's how it was? Everytime I fucked up, you came behind me and cleaned it up to the best of your ability. I flunked a class, you spent your entire summer helping me pass it so I wouldn’t be left behind the next year. I ran away from home and you found me a place to stay so I wouldn’t be homeless. I depended on you so much that I needed to know that I could do it on my own. You needed to go to the school of your dreams so you could do the work you were clearly called to do. I know I went about it the wrong way, I realize that.” 

His voice grew closer, so you closed your eyes, hoping you wouldn’t have to face him. “You broke my heart, Ji.” It hurt him to hear you say it, it hurt even more to hear how brokenhearted you sounded. “I thought that whatever we faced in life, we’d be in it together. Until the wheels fell off. Isn't that what we used to say? Isn't that what we promised?” It was more of a rhetorical question, you were sure you both knew the answer to that question.

“Then all of a sudden I was alone. You’d iced me out. I left the country right after graduation because I couldn’t stand even the thought of running into you, seeing your fucking punchable face. I realized on the plane why it hurt so bad. Why losing you as a friend hurt me worse than losing my childhood best friend to the glimmer of popularity. It was because I loved you. I came to the fucked up realization that somewhere along the way I had fallen madly in love with my best friend. If I thought I was heartbroken before, that made it far worse.” You finally turned to face him.

“Imagine, finally being able to move on. Finally free from the burden of unrequited love, just to hear his voice on the radio.” You chuckled humorously. “To have your friends gush over how hot the lead singer of this band was. Telling you just what his voice did to them in excruciating detail.” You sighed deeply just thinking of all the things your friends said they wanted to do to him or what they wanted him to do to them. 

“To have to suffer silently while they sang his songs or shoved his content down your throat. All while you are nursing the gaping wound he left behind. To keep having to relive the moment he gutted you like a fucking fish all because he what-? Wanted to be less dependent on you?” You tilted your head back as you scoffed. “I had no one, Jisung. You were my only friend. Just like you were dependent on me, it was the same for me. I had to rebuild myself once you were gone. It took years for me to open up to people, I had closed myself off afraid I’d be abandoned by someone else I considered my friend.” He could see that you were fighting back tears. He reached for you only for you to pull back.

“That's for a friend to do. Not for some random stranger that followed me to my room.” That's when the realization hit him. This looked bad. Really bad. He'd followed a girl to her room from a party. Even if you, him, and a few party goers knew the type of relationship you used to have, that was far in the past at this point. You didn't know each other now. For all he knew, you could have had a few drinks. All it took was one out of control rumor and his career would be over. He backed up, letting his hands fall to his side.

“I’m sorry.” His voice was low, almost nonexistent. “Please, let me be that for you again. It doesn’t have to be a full blown friendship, even if I want to work my way back to that. Just- just let me be there for you, please?” Jisung cautiously stepped closer with his arms stretched. It was a slow wrap of his arms around your frame, before he pulled you in close, patting your back soothingly. You both melted into each other. He swore nothing else felt more like home than being in your arms. He hugged you tighter and you broke down, sobbing into his fuzzy cardigan.

“I fucking hate you, Ji.” You gently hit his arm as you wrapped your arms around him. He chuckled lightly, a smile spreading on his lips.

“That’s okay, I’ll take the hate. Just as long as that means one day I can get you to love me again.”

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You took a few moments to recollect yourself, deciding to return to your brother's party. You tried to convince Jisung to go ahead without you, since he was being paid to be there, but he refused. He stuck with you the whole elevator ride back down and all the way until you made it into the reception. “Where the heck have you been?” A man approached the two of you, one who you could only assume was his manager. “You just ran off stage without a word. Do you know how that makes you look?” As he laid into him, you slowly backed away, going for your escape. Only for Jisung to reach back and grab your hand.

“I- I know, Hyung. I- this is her. This is my, Y/n.” He lightly tugged you forward, showing the man you clasped hands. “This is her little brother's wedding. I’ll perform a few songs by myself to make up for my absence. You and the rest of the guys can go ahead and head out. I’m so sorry for the inconvenience.” The man looked at him skeptically before he nodded in agreement.

“Fine. I’ll see you back in Seoul in a few weeks. You have a great vacation.” His eyes traveled to you as he plastered on a warm smile. “Congratulations on getting your PHD, I know your family must be proud, Dr. Y/l/n. I know someone was.” His eyes darted to Jisung before he bowed and left to gather up the rest of the band.

“How did you even know I got my phd?” You asked, stealthily trying to pull your hand away from the death grip he had it in, but he didn’t let go. 

“I… kind of kept up with you. Mostly on my finsta account. I also might have received news from your brother. He came to confront me at one of my shows and we’ve been in contact since. Please don’t be mad at him, I asked him to keep it from you. I didn’t want you to find a way to cut off my supply. Knowing you were doing well is what kept me going.” You sent a scowl towards your brother, who must have felt a disturbance in the force. He put his hands up to say he had no choice. You’d talk to him about this later.

“I wanted to experience the milestones in your life, even if it was from secondhand stories.” He pulled out his phone, there was a photo album dedicated to you with pictures spanning from the first time you met up until your first day at your new job as a child psychologist in a nearby children's hospital. “Though I couldn’t be there, I still want to say, congratulations. I’m proud of you.” You rolled your eyes.

“So, what you are saying is… you internet stalked me for years and even pulled my younger brother into it, with a promise to sing at his wedding. Tsk tsk. Wait until the internet gets a hold of that.” You joked. The panic in his eyes before the realization was hilarious to you. “I’m joking, Jisung.” You smiled, “Thank you for being interested in my progress through life. Congratulations to you as well, Mr. Grammy nominated artist. That's amazing, Ji. It really is. I guess we really got what we wanted, huh?” You smiled wistfully. 

But the smile slid right off of Jisung's face. He got part of what he wanted. The other part was standing right in front of him, her hand in his. And as close as she was, she was still so far away. In his mind, it was all a matter of if he was going to truly confess everything in his heart, right here, right now. He was frightened that he might overwhelm you if he did.

Though he had let it slip that he loved you earlier in your hotel room, that was nowhere close to the extent of what he felt for you. He wanted to shout it from the rooftop that the woman he loved had accepted him back into her life after he’d gone and fucked everything up.

Jisung had been swept up in a whirlwind, being introduced to all of you and your brother's mutual friends. His mind being put at ease, finding out that Hangyul was in fact not your boyfriend. Even if a blind person could tell he had fallen for your charm, Jisung was glad that was just his feeling and it wasn’t mutual apparently. Not with how far you put your wedding partner in the friendzone.

Giving Jisung a kind of go ahead to wiggle his way out of the friend zone he’d finally gotten back into. He excused himself, figuring it was time to finish out this set he was kind of sort of paid for. He sat on a stool on stage, acoustic guitar in hand, mic in front of him. “Sorry for bailing out on you all earlier. I saw the love of my life running out of the wedding hall and I needed to catch her before I made the second biggest mistake of my life.” 

Your eyes widened from the crowd where you were standing next to your brother and his husband. “The first was letting her go in the first place. I was young and apparently very stupid. I pushed the best thing that had ever happened to me out of my life and I’ve regretted that decision for the last eight years, twenty-six days..” He looked at his watch, “Ten hours, seven minutes, and 13- no 15 seconds.”

The crowd looked between the two of you, fascinated by the little tale the global rockstar was telling on this modest wedding stage. “I won’t be stupid this time. I promise to cherish every second that I’m blessed to have you in my life. I love you, Y/n. I have always loved you and I always will, no matter how much time passes.” You were holding back your tears. Jisung had always had your heart and despite you trying your best to keep your walls up, afraid that he would hurt you again, they all came tumbling down with every word that he spoke. 

“So, to the grooms. I hope that the two of you continue this beautiful love affair and cherish every single second you have together. Love isn’t something we should push down and trample on, it's something that is meant to be held on to, prized, and exalted.” He cleared his voice. “So, this is for the lovers in the crowd…I hope you love last a lifetime. I hope it never fizzles or fades and burns bright for eternity.” 

He strummed the first few chords of the song, the sound immediately bringing up fond memories of you and Jisung arguing over the best version of it, The Cure, 311, or Adele’s. You were always torn between 311 and Adele’s, while he was adamant that the original was far superior. It’s as if the rest of the world faded into the distance.

Call it tunnel vision, but all you could see was him and all he could see was you. You swayed gently, the gentle sea breeze dancing across your skin just like the melody of his voice. You hummed in tune with him, heart swelling as you realized, this song was for you. He was singing it, for you and only you.

“However far away I will always love you However long I stay I will always love you Whatever words I say I will always love you I will always love you…”

_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲_̲

You don’t remember the exact sequence of events but something clicked after Jisung’s solo performance. Maybe it was the look he gave you that made you feel like you were the center of his universe. Maybe it was the friendly banter you shared while having a few drinks. Maybe it was the late night stroll you took down to the beach or the way he held you to keep you warm. Or maybe it was the kiss you shared under the moonlight, the first of many for the night that got you going. But whatever it was that got you here, you were thankful for whatever combination it was that had you pressed against the door of your hotel room with Jisung’s lips and body pressed against yours. The feeling of his lips on yours felt electric. 

In your youth, you often wondered how it would feel to have that plum lower lips of his between yours. What it might feel like to bite it, just wanting to see his reaction. His reaction was nothing short of mind boggling. The groan that passed his lips, caused you to groan in return. Jisung’s fingers trailed over your body, slowly exploring every inch he could. Every inch that his teenage body begged to explore even back then. Every inch that he dreamed about, steamy scenes that played behind his eyelids every night. He had to be closer to you, the absence of you in his life had left a gaping void that he needed to fill. Right here. Right now. In the very moment. His shirt was first. Tossed somewhere to the side, leaving the tattoos and muscles that he’d gained over the last eight years. Your eyes widened, distracted by the hard musculature he had developed.

Your fingers traveled from his shoulders down over his pecs, making him shiver and whimper. The sounds give you ideas that your heart didn’t want you to act on, but your mind gave you the full go ahead on. “When was the last time..” You asked, hand in the center of his chest as you guided him backwards. He looked back, afraid he would fall, but you grabbed his chin making sure he kept his eyes solely on you. You didn’t stop until the back of his legs hit the mattress, then all it took was a simple push. Jisung was at your will. His round eyes shining up at you with pure anticipation in them.

“When was the last time you had sex, Ji?” You took off your red blazer fist, tossing it on a nearby chair. Next came your vest, you slowly and methodically took your time with each button, simply because you could, but also because the only thing under it was your bra. His eyes darted around, he swallowed hard. His blood was rushing straight to bulge in his pants.

“I-I don’t know. I-it’s been a while..” He kept his statement vague, too overwhelmed by everything that was happening to pinpoint an exact date. “A year- I think. Maybe more.” You smirked, shrugging the vest off your shoulders and tossing it to be with your blazer. You reached down and grabbed his hands, placing them on the waistband of your trousers.

“Take them off.” Oh the look of panic in his eyes set your heart aflame. He was absolutely the cutest. And even though you weren’t normally one to take full control in situations like this, you were oh so looking forward to taking advantage of your dear friend's vulnerability. He was going to be your tonight. The man's trembling fingers reached for the button, almost too shaky to undo them. You were patient, running your fingers through his silky hair. It took him a few minutes, the cool cross-breeze from the open balcony window offering a little air to cool off the heat on your skin. “Panties too.” God, the way the words sounded as they entered his ears did more for him than anything ever did. He’d been waiting to hear those words forever at this point. 

His brain nearly malfunctioned when he moved a little closer to slip off your panties, your scent filling his waiting nostrils. He could explode. Would you think bad of him if he came right now? He’d promise to make it up to you. He must have been led by another power, because he would swear that he had no body autonomy at that moment. His brain wasn’t even at a functioning level that would be considered functional.

You were bare before him, lust darkening your beautiful eyes. He whimpered. “Please..” He didn’t know what he was pleading for, but that didn’t mean you didn’t enjoy hearing it any less. He was pushed back on the bed, stripped of his pants and underwear. Things were going so fast in real life, but his brain had slowed everything else down.

He barely noticed that you had straddled him and started teasing your slit with his tip. He wasn’t even aware of the noises that were loudly slipping from his lips. Jisung was in a haze, one that was carefully crafted by you, the goddess that sat above him.

The whimper that fell from his lips when you slipped him inside of you was the most orgasmic sound to have ever filled your ears. His still shaking fingers flew to your hips, needing something to ground him at this moment. His blunt nails dug into your sides as you teased his tip, letting him dip only a part of it into your entrance. “God.. please…. Please…” He begged, voice strained and whiny. 

He was definitely going to explode like this. He hadn’t even fully entered you and he was already losing his mind. He bit down on his bottom lip, eyes slipping closed as he tried to control himself. But his hips had other plans, he bucked up, pressing himself further into you and that was it, he came on the spot. The tight warmth was too much for him to handle at that moment. You pushed your hips down on him as he came, feeling the stream of cum coat your walls.

When his breathing calmed and his grip on your hips loosened, you pulled what little of him was inside of you out. Tsk’ing at the man underneath you. “Is my baby fucked out already?” You stroked his drenched cock, adding even more wetness by spitting on it. “You couldn’t even slip it in without coming, huh? What happened to that sex god of a rockstar everyone that you were?” He whimpered again, edging on overstimulation as you purposely targeted the head of his cock.

His fists were balled in the sheets, bottom lip chapped red from trying to bite into it. “S-stop, please..” You pouted at him before shaking your head. He deserved to torture just a little for all of the years the two of you missed out on doing this. You could have been his ages ago. His first girl and him as your first boy. But here you were eight years later, with a nice amount of experience under your wings. You were going to take full advantage of it. Jisung’s body convulsed as he came again. His body became rigid as he spurted his cum all over your lower stomach and hands. You jumped, surprised by the sheer amount of it.

You stuck your cum slick fingers in his open mouth, jolting his eyes open. His initial surprise melted as he enjoyed the taste of him on your skin. “Now, you are going to eat me out until I come. Got it?” You leaned down, grabbing his chin to make him look at you in the eyes. You opened his mouth and spit on his tongue, closing it back for him to accept it. You moved, lying down next to him. He wasted no time, getting between your legs expediently.

Jisung could die right now, happily. You were here with him, in the bed, his cum on your body and mingling with your own and pooling at your entrance. A feast, just for him. Everything and more than he could have ever asked for. He dove in, mind fogged with thoughts of you. Your taste. Your smell. That lustful yet dominant look in your eyes as you laced your fingers into his long, permed hair.

And the taste of you? It deserved five Michelin stars, two more than regular just because he said so. You tugged on his hair as he wrapped his plum little mouth around your clit. You used his hair as your anchor to move his head around as you saw fit. A hair pull to signal him to go faster, a pull to the left or right for him to move his tongue elsewhere. He was like your own little tongue flicking toy with a customizable setting. He lapped, sucked, and licked to both you and his content. His moans and whimpers almost outnumber yours.

He was in heaven between your legs, and would gladly mark his tombstone in this very place. His skilled tongue sent you barreling over the edge, your grip on his hair tightening to an almost painful level, but he didn’t complain. He was just happy that he was the one who was able to make you unfold like this.

Your other hand grabbed him by the neck, pulling him up to you for a passionate kiss. You could eat him alive if he let you. The hand in his hair slipped between the two of you. He had already started rutting his hips against you, desperate to feel you again. It was easy to grab him and slip him into you once again, but this time for real. 

Your breath hitched as his eyes rolled back. Your fingers still around his neck squeezed lightly as you continued to unmake and reassemble him with your kisses. He felt like he could feel every single atom that made him, him. His hips were slow to move at first, but once he built his rhythm, that was that. The sound coming from between the two of you was filthy. Spit and cum and your spent were mixing to make the glide in and out of your tight walls even easier for him.

Your toes were curled, knees digging into his sides as you squeezed your legs around him. “Fill me up, Ji. Fuck me full of your love.” Your name slipped off his lips like a prayer at your words. He’d give you the moon and the stars if you kept talking to him like that. “Isn’t that what you've always wanted? To make me yours?” He nodded frantically. You paused your words, fluttering around him at a more consistent pace. You were close, both of you knew it. Both of you could feel it.

“Yo-you are mine.” He kissed at your jaw, “Please, co-come with me. I- I need you-” He couldn’t get his words out to finish his thoughts. He had already murmured the magic phrase. “You are mine.” You came around him, pulling your lips only a breath away, taking in the air that escaped his mouth into your own lungs like it was the only oxygen you needed. His followed almost immediately, your tight cunt draining him of any energy of essence he had left. Your walls continued to flutter around him, even after every drop of him had been emptied into you.

Your hands fell to your sides, legs unlocking from around him. You had nothing left to give, but love to the man you’d loved most of your life. He rolled off of you, body slick with perspiration and the mixed essence that both of you expelled. He exhaled deeply, hand searching for yours, finding it nearby and over the covers. He kissed the back of it, eyes boring into yours. Unspoken words being said with just a look. The both of you admitting what you both knew as this escapade started. You were in love.

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“Encore! Encore! Encore!” The crowd chanted loudly. The lights in the stadium had just dimmed, signaling that the last song had been played. But they still begged for more. The band was backstage, goofy smiles on all of their faces. Adrenaline is still pulsing through their bodies.

“One more, guys?” Jisung asked and they all quickly agreed. One more song to end the night. They headed back on stage to an onslaught of rabid cheers. They had one more song up their sleeves. A song that eighteen year old Jisung had pinned himself, one that embodied the way he felt when he saw the heartbreak in your eyes when he pushed you away. He wanted to do nothing more than to wipe your tears, and hold your hand.

To tell you that everything would be okay. That he loved you, forever and always. Because to him, there was no him without you. He stood amongst his band on stage, belting the lyrics to the song. Eyes focused on the only person he wanted to see in a room full of people, the woman he loved. The person almost all of his songs were about. You, with that big proud smile plastered on your face.

“'Cause all I want is you, not your tears 눈물이 마를 때까지 I wanna make you the happiest one, no fear So baby, hold my hand now…”

FIN

© ✐Channieskies 『MINORS DNI! This post contains nsfw material. Please do not interact with it if you are under the age of 18. Do not translate or repost here or on other sites. Please leave a like , comment, and reblog if you enjoyed this story.♥』

SONG CREDITS: ✻BIG BANG - LOSER ✻ONE OK ROCK - WHEREVER YOU ARE ✻HAN - VOLCANO ✻THE CURE: LOVESONG ✻HAN - HOLD MY HAND

[atimeofyourlife]

Caring for you is my love language

@bucktommyfluffebruary day 1: nonsexual intimacy | rated: g | wc: 711 | ao3 Buck takes care of Tommy after Maddie and Chimney's wedding

Getting Tommy home and taken care of was the priority. They'd had about an hour to celebrate Maddie and Chimney before the nurses came around to kick everyone out, and Buck could feel just how exhausted Tommy was. The fact he even showed up after being on the line battling a fire like that, it meant a lot to him. Now he wanted to just look after Tommy.

Getting him down and into the jeep was easy, his turnouts double bagged in garbage bags Buck had charmed the nurses into giving them. Just so the smell wouldn't get everywhere before Tommy was able to get them back to Harbor for cleaning.

Tommy did try to put up something of a fight when he realized that Buck had brought him back to the loft, rather than making the drive across town to his place, but Buck quickly shut it down.

"You could just drop me home." Tommy said through a yawn as Buck pulled into his parking spot.

"I could have. But we're here now. You can get cleaned up and be asleep much sooner than if we had to drive across town." Buck replied.

"I-. I could wait. You don't need to take care of me."

"I don't need to. But I want to." Buck countered. "And at least if you stay with me, I don't have to worry about you braining yourself in the shower."

"Okay." Tommy agreed, allowing Buck to help him out of the jeep and into the building.

Buck managed to convince Tommy to eat a portion of the soup he kept frozen for when he felt under the weather, or when he'd had a long shift and didn't feel like cooking. It was quick to heat in the microwave, and Buck lightly warmed some bread to go along with it. It was wasn't the best meal he could make, but it was the quickest along with being filling.

Then it was into the shower. Buck shot upstairs to grab some changes of clothes, both shorts and sweatpants, unsure what Tommy would prefer to wear to bed. He hesitated over underwear, unsure what the rules were over sharing underwear when you were dating a man. He'd shared clothes with Eddie a number of times, but underwear was always off limits, they were close friends, but not that close. And he had experience with some of his girlfriends, especially Taylor, stealing his boxers for something comfortable to sleep in. He decided to grab some, leaving it up to Tommy if he wanted to wear them. He came back down to find Tommy dozing at the table.

"Come on, shower time, then bed." Buck gently shook Tommy's shoulder.

Tommy just grumbled in response, burying his head deeper into his arms.

"Hey, your neck and back will hate you in the morning if I let you sleep like that" Buck helped Tommy up and across to the downstairs bathroom. He still couldn't understand why a lofted studio needed two bathrooms, but this was just one of many times he was thankful for it. And he was doubly thankful for the built in bench in the downstairs shower.

He helped Tommy out of his clothes, and pushed him to sit down on the bench, starting the shower on hot, then making quick work of his own clothes. He joined Tommy in the shower, washcloth in hand, and dropped to his knees.

"Baby, I'm too exhausted." Tommy mumbled, looking down at Buck with his eyes almost closed.

Buck huffed a laugh. "Just let me take care of you." He made quick work of washing Tommy, methodically moving up from his feet. By the time he reached Tommy's hair, the other main was slumped against the tile, snoring softly. Buck smiled at the sight, this feeling like one of the most intimate moments he'd ever had with any of his partners, he pressed a kiss to Tommy's forehead, before scrubbing himself down in almost record time.

He hated having to wake Tommy again, but knew from experience nothing good would come from falling asleep in the shower. He helped Tommy get dried and dressed, before taking him upstairs to bed. Settling down next to Tommy, he couldn't help hoping this could be forever.

[jirishnesensei]

Mirio Togata x Reader | Isekai AU [18+]

Warming up to you ch3. It's an anime

⊱ Pairings - mirio 3rd year student x reader

⊱ About - Boku No Hero Academia was your favourite anime. You watched it every week when a new episode came out, but what if you were transported into the world?Having no clue how you got there and you're being accused of being a part of the League Of Villians.Suffice to say, it's not the best way to start the show.

⊱ Warnings/tags - 18+ (eventually), fluff(for the most part), angst, smut, fem reader, romance, pining, SLOW BURN, swearing, friends to lovers, death, jealousy, she falls first he falls harder, mirio is mean (with reason), first everything, sassy mirio, fangirl reader, unrequited love

⊱ status - ongoing

⊱ chapters - 3/x

⊱ word count - 2.4k

A/N - Hello! omg it's been a long time coming posting this story here XD just wanted to say thank you for those that hearted, reblogged and all that! This is unfathomably one of my most prized stories that's been giving me a migraine for years (seriously, and still ongoing) but I hope you enjoy it as much as I have (⁠θ⁠‿⁠θ⁠) okay bye!

Mirio decided to have Sir Night eye ask you the questions about Shie Hassaikai, which was smart on his account.

Now you were both heading over to Sir Nighteyes agency bright and early in the morning. Mirio definitely didn't know what sleeping in meant. You yawned obnoxiously loud to maybe catch the attention of a certain blonde and it was a success going off of the look he gave you.

"You slept for at least 9 hours."

"Yeah, well I need twelve. Thirteen if I need to do things during the day." You answered sarcastically. It's like the boy forgot you fell down thousands of feet from the sky not even 24 hours ago. He didn't entertain anymore conversation after that and it was a fairly quick walk to the agency.

Mirio stopped infront of a large set of green doors. Pushing one open while gesturing for you to go in first. You walked through, already feeling the cold air conditioning hit your bare skin.

You were given the lovely opportunity to wash your face and brush your teeth, but you were still dressed in the same clothes from your world. You felt gross, and that's putting it lightly.

"His office is this way." Mirio says as he walked down the long corridor then started his way up the signature spiral staircase. Your body was getting tingly at the thought of meeting Sir Nighteye. What were you going to tell him? He isn't even nice... so what if he doesn't even give you a chance to speak? What if he wants you to make him laugh?! Oh god you were terrible at jokes. Now that you were hopelessly scared, you tugged on Mirios white collard shirt, making him look down at you.

"Mirio I don't know how to make Sir Night eye laugh." You didn't see it but Mirio's eyes widened at how you knew one of his mentors rules. He didn't allow you to hear the shock in his voice though.

"Don't worry, if you're telling the truth then Sir won't care if you make him laugh or not." You nodded limbly. Still a bit shaken from the idea of meeting the Sir Nighteye.

When you reached the top of the stairs and walked down one last corridor, Mirio held the door knob and looked back at you. Your head hung low, it was obvious you were psyching yourself out. He rolled his eyes, not liking how his sense of hero duties were clouding his judgement with the fact that you could be a villain. Nonetheless he faced you and held your shoulders. The contact makes your skin crawl and hold your breath and for the first time since looking at him you actually notice how blue his eyes are. Like the deepest part of the ocean where sunlight can't even reach. Okay, that's leaning more towards black... but that's just how much melanin is in his eyes.

"Stop worrying, everything will be fine." He gives you one of those hero smiles, the kind that melts your heart and nearly your legs too, but you had atleast some kind of self-control. For now.

Mirio turns back to the door so you can get distracted by his broad back instead and knocks twice before walking in, now beaming brightly as the Mirio Togata you and every bnha fan knew. You couldn't help but roll your eyes at that.

"Good morning Sir!" 

You peer past him and see the one and only Sasaki Mirai, aka, Sir Nighteye seated by his desk.

"Mirio. is this the girl?" Sir Nighteye looks you over and it feels like his gaze pierced straight through your very soul. He was so much more intimidating in person. How in the world did Midoriya have the guts to make fun of All Might under these circumstances?

"Yes Sir. She claims she has information on Shie Hassaikai." Sir Nighteye nods then thanks Mirio for the notice before telling him to head off to campus. As Mirio turned to leave, you look at him with pleading eyes to not leave you alone, ofcourse he doesn't stay... but a girl can dream, right?

The door slams shut and now it was just you and Sir Nighteye in the room. You glanced around, trying not to make direct eye contact with him and instead focused on all the All Might merchandise that was everywhere. There was actually way more than they focused on in the anime...

"Do you know what my quirk is?" Sir Nighteye startles you out of your daze and his cold voice makes you stand straighter like you're in the military.

"Yes sir! It's foresight! You are able to look into a person's future upon contact with them for an hour!" You yelled this as if you were being graded for a test. And the outcome of that test is either prison or freedom. It was only now that you realize if you can't back up your claim, you could be in some serious touble here. Sir Nighteye hmph'ed as if satisfied with your answer and then stood up from his chair, making you flinch slightly.

"So you know what will happen if I look into your future." He states calmly, removing his glasses to clean while walking around his desk and then leaned his lower back on it. Hunching slightly from his tall posture.

You nod, unsure where he was going by stating that.

"Tell me something only I would know miss..?"

"Uh (y/n)... (y/n) (l/n)" You answered.

"Miss (y/n)" He gestured for you to continue. You visibly gulped. Was it getting hot in here? It feels like it's getting hotter. What do you tell him? You could tell him about Midoriya being the successor for One For All... that should definitely prove it, but that could land you in big trouble for even knowing such a secret. You pondered and pondered over what to say, making Sir Nighteye grow impatient.

"If you don't know-"

"No wait! I do... I do know, I just don't know which scene to tell you about-" Sir Nighteye grew confused by your choice of words, but gave you a few more minutes.

You bit your lip and wrung your fingers, desperately trying to will your mind to think of something, anything. You were very nervous if it wasn't painfully obvious already.

"Oh! I know!" Sir Nighteye looked at you intently as you were about to speak. You knew exactly what to say now.

"I can tell you exactly what happened-" you start, Sir Nighteye leans a bit forward, not fooling anyone with how intrigued he was on how you could supposedly tell them exactly where Shie Hassaikai is.

"-when Midoriya came to request for a work study here!" You finished with a winning smile as if you just said the numbers to the lottery. Sir Nighteye visibly sunk at what you just said then pushed his glasses back up, clearly not impressed by your revelation.

"Wait, just hear me out atleast! Wouldn't it be crazy if I could tell you exactly what happened in this room without ever being in it? Even what happened before Midoriya and Mirio walked into the room?" You urged. Sir Nighteye sighed, looked over his shoulder at his All Might clock then back at you. 

"Okay fine, I'll bite. Tell me what happened. Before Midoriya and Mirio walked in."

You nod earnestly and rack up all of your memories from that scene. You had watched this season so many times, you couldn't get it wrong the one time you needed to truly remember it.

"Bubble girl, your assistant, was telling you about the incident that was linked to Shie Hassakai and the league of villains. I'm not sure where the place was... but you were watching an All Might video while she spoke to you and because she wasn't being humorous enough, you tied her to some torture tickling machine and started to tickle her!" You finish off like you just convinced your mother that it wasn't you who broke her favourite dish. Eagerly waiting for Sir nighteye's response.

He was definitely shocked going off of his expression. You told him near to the tea what was happening before Mirio and Midoriya walked in which so to speak should be impossible. He pushes his glasses up again, not wanting to show more of his emotion and spoke.

"What happened when they entered?" You bit your bottom lip.

Did I get something wrong?

You cleared your throat and tried to remember what happened after, "You told Midoriya that he has to make you laugh for you to consider him as an intern and so he imitated All Might, which I thought was really funny, but you accused him of ridiculing All Might and then told him his wrinkles were in the wrong places and then... you both just kinda went at it and fanboyed over All Might." You laughed nervously.

"Oh! and before you stamped Midoriyas papers you made him spar with you! Which he lost... but he completely dodged all of your All Might posters, right?!" You hold your breath. You could feel your palms sweating. You were desperately trying to get Sir Nighteye to believe you here, but his stoic expression was so difficult to read through. He sighs once more and walked over to you. You step back in fear, but he grabbed your shoulder to keep you in place and used his quirk on you. You were hypnotized the second that he did, eyes fixated on his. They were actually moving like gears... tiny, mini gears and it was incredible. Sir Nighteye lets go of you and then stood up straight again.

"It's near to impossible that you could tell me that, but I still don't understand how. What is your quirk?" He looks down at you so intensely. Your legs really felt like they were going to give in at any moment. You laugh awkwardly under his gaze that now felt like they could see right through your skin. Like you're talking intestines and everything. It made you uncomfortable.

"Its not a quirk... it's um... haha, you're gonna think this is funny, but it's an anime." His expression stays the same, as if waiting for the punchline.

I knew he wanted a joke!

"I uh, gosh," You awkwardly rub your forehead, "I don't know how else to explain it..." You look down to the ground, feeling too exposed to look him directly in the eye anymore. Sir Nighteye realized this and turned on his heel to sit back down by his desk, gesturing for you to take a seat opposite. You take his offer and sit down then suck in a decent breath, preparing for the millions of questions to follow.

"I'm not from this planet. Or whatever this place is. Back where I'm from this place is known as My Hero Academia. An anime that people around the globe watch."

⊱ Next chapter: Coming soon!

⊱ Take me to the prev chap!

Taglist - @the-faceless-bride @distinguishedoafbiscuitopera

Dividers by - @cafekitsune and @strangergraphics

[evesedenramblings]

What's the Tozu theory about him trying to bring the last two survivors into his organisation you mentioned in your Damon and Pythias analysis??

P.S. I really like all your posts.

First of- thank you so much!! I’m really happy to hear you like the posts!!!!

The very short version of the theory is that I believe Tozu runs a cult dedicated to redeeming/fixing Ultimates. I’m pretty sure his process is to 1) strip the students of their pride by making them murder each other, going from 16 students until only 2 remain (as the rules state). Then, 2) have them prove who’s worthy of actually being an Ultimate by forcing them into a free-for-all (as seen in Prologue Trial). Assuming Damon’s name symbolism comes into play, this particular game will be special and the last 2 survivors will refuse to kill each other and that’s just as charming to Tozu. It’s “Ultimate” to overcome the set challenge, and that’s what matters.

As for the reasoning behind it, it currently seems the world is overabundant with Ultimates, and a lot of useless ones at that who contribute nothing to society. To Tozu, it’s just getting rid of deadweight who can’t handle the pressure of being Ultimate, and then those who can are welcomed to the true Eden’s Garden Academy.

There could also be more behind Tozu’s motives- we know Ultimates are important via context clues, and a lot of them but other than that we don’t actually know a lot of about P:EG’s world-building yet given our setting. Given it’s a Fangonranpa, the motivation could just be that Ultimates are meant to be symbols of Hope, but Tozu thinks they’ve been seriously lacking. We only have one chapter so far so who knows!

This Q/A has sparked a LOT of actual notes from my brain to my notes app so you can expect a full proper post on this theory soon. Thanks again so much for asking!

[quilaudatur]

I can never have you

It's tragic

I loved you the first second I laid eyes on you

It was like magic

I hope I hid it well enough

I hope you didn't notice

The fool you called a friend

Time spent with you that I wished wouldn't end

Am I an imbecile or a gentleman

If I never tried taking you from him

Why did I play by the rules

Why did I respect a reality so grim

Maybe if I had fought it

You'd have run into my arms

Maybe if I defied fate you'd have fallen for my charms

Your touch was ecstasy

I couldn't get enough

It was only your hand in mine

And for me that was plenty

It filled my heart which was once so empty

Your smile was my light

Your laugh was intoxicating

You never left my mind

Day til night

I'm sorry my dear I've prayed so much

I'm sorry your pain would've answered it

I'm sorry I wanted him gone and I'm sorry I was a hypocrite

All is fair in love and war was something I heard them say

I never thought it was advice

I never thought it was guidance for me to take

For here I stand in the ruins of my heart

Mourning what we could've had together

Mourning what could've been

And I find myself wondering

Should I have been the villain in his story,

If it meant I could be the hero in ours?

Should I have fought for you,

Torn apart the world if I had to?

Should I have done everything—

Everything short of destroying him?

Alas I sit here

My heart broken

And I can never call you mine

And fate has spoken

[sillywizardvoice]

Last Line Challenge ‼️

Thanks for the tag @c-c2224 I don’t typically post about my fics but I’m excited! Please enjoy a bit of one of the bajillion of quinfox one shots I’ve written and never posted.

Rules: post the last line you wrote or drew. tag some people.

Fox turned back to fiddling with his comms and Quinlan shuffled his feet, suddenly at a loss for words.

Because here’s the kicker: Quinlan didn’t make friends. He had Bant and Obi-Wan, and Aayla, but they were all people he had known almost as long as he could remember, or since padawanship in Aayla’s case. Quinlan didn’t make friends, just stumbled into relationships with little understanding of how he got there, like walking into a room and forgetting what you were doing there. Worse, these people seemed to swirl right past, sand in the flowing river of the Force. Jedi weren’t meant to be selfish, but sometimes Quinlan found himself desperately wishing for someone that stayed.

And now, here was someone offering him an olive branch for no reason other than want. Someone who had an odd understanding of Quinlan, who he could spend hours with and never get bored. And so he made a decision. Quinlan would not let the moment pass him by this time, he would grab on with both hands.

“I’m Quinlan. That chase was fun,” Quinlan returned, slightly breathless. He was already promising himself to keep this good thing, to hold this sarcastic, fiery person in his heart and hope he wouldn’t have to let go anytime soon.

Let me know if I should post these, I keep writing one shots and leaving them to sit in my google docs to rot. I’m Thats_Neat on ao3 too, if anyone cares lol

tagging: @raphaerolo @lesbianforlottie @patchpane (no pressure, and lmk if you don’t wanna be tagged in these 😊)

[luckyartdrawer]

100 Follower Milestone!!! Royal AU!!!

🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

Technically the PT 2 for celebrating due to a tie in the poll. PT 1 here <3

✨🎉✨🎉✨🎉✨🎉✨🎉✨

Here ye, here ye! The newly crowned King Eclipse finally comes down to greet his people!

Created to be the perfect ruler, a nation's answer to repeated corrupt leadership, Eclipse is meant to be the best combination of both logic and care. It seems today True Eclipse graces us today, how wonderful! Though one cannot help but be curious about individually meeting with the nurturing Sun or the analytical Moon protocols...

(vvv Extras and AU lore/Yapping below! vvv)

Without the bright lighting <3

I apologize about the long wait lovelies, life and some art struggles had kept me from completing this lovely fella. Said art struggles being that I just couldn't get this piece to how it looks in my head and I was becoming frustrated with it 😔

So, instead of grinding myself down with stubbornness, I decided to get things as presentable as possible and releasing this silly to the world. I hope in the end this is still satisfying for y'all to see! <3

I had so much I wanted to do but the art was not arting and this has been sitting for too long on the wayside uaghhh-

But that's enough of that! For those of you interested in AU ideas/lore/plot, here's what I cooked up :3

This world takes place in a time where humans and animatronics are both commonplace and recognized as sentient - though it is still a somewhat recent development (around 100 years) for AI sentience to be widely accepted. Tensions between them were dwindling, but at the appearance of the Animatronic King, whispers of worrying conspiracies started floating around the human population...

Eclipse was built by a team of humans and animatronics to solely to rule over the nation. (I have yet to come up with a kingdom name bc I am terrible at them) The kingdom was not exactly failing under its previous rulers, but crime was rampant and outrage was plentiful at how the previous leaders seemed to turn a blind eye to the citizen's pains as long as they had a reason to benefit from it. With a staggering show of community and a great growth in companionship, both humans and Animatronics worked together and overthrew the kingdom, but with no single person able to agree on who will take over, eventually a tense agreement came about building a new ruler...

Eclipse has multiple modes that can be willingly switched out at any time:

True Eclipse mode is when both the Sun and Moon protocols are active, neither taking priority over the other -- see it as if both Sun and Moon are controlling a body at the same time! In this state, their thoughts intermingle rapidly and slight disagreements between the protocols won't be an issue as in this state mitigation is at its easiest, both sides understanding what the other is thinking and feeling to the fullest. They seem to form almost a new personality together, but hints of both sides' quirks peek out, like Sun's habit of rambling and Moon's fidgeting and chewing habits when focused or stressed.

The Sun mode is when the more empathetic AI protocol has taken the lead. This will happen in different ways, such as when the situation calls for a more caring and delicate approach to things, when the Moon AI protocol doesn't wish to be present or allows the singularity, and when the AI itself fights/forces it's way into the front if it absolutely feels as necessary, much like how emotions do.

The Moon mode is when the more calm and calculating AI protocol has taken the lead. This will happen in different ways, such as when the situation calls for a logical and cold approach to things, when the Sun AI protocol doesn't wish to be present or allows the singularity, and when the AI itself overrides its way to the front if absolutely necessary for the betterment of the nation, as sometimes drastic measures must be taken no matter what.

(AKA, Sun, Moon, Eclipse are all one AI, but Sun and Moon are their own protocols, and they combine protocols to make Eclipse!)

Their appearance does not change much between modes! Only their eye colors change, and the only other way to tell if they have switched modes is by their physical and vocal mannerisms:

Sun has a fast voice that's typically upbeat and cheery! He occasionally stumbles over himself as he tends to think faster than he speaks.

Moon has a slow voice that doesn't usually show much emotion and can tend to mumble. There are usually small to long pauses when having a conversation with him, as he tends to calculate what the best plausible response would be.

Eclipse is the most calm sounding, able to project or lower his voice if necessary but otherwise talks at an even speaking volume. His smooth and ready responses make him come across as charming and well put together, no matter how many times he admits otherwise.

Don't let their coded dispositions and stagnant smile fool you! All the modes still can hold the wide array emotions, though some are harder to upset or phase than others. :3

(They like to cover their smile when upset or thinking. Only their eyes/eyelids can move--and I suppose their nightcap too-- to show expression!)

Is there any plans for a y/n or x reader?

Sure, eventually I'll make a fic for it! This was an idea I had for a while but never decided to officially cook up. It'll probably be a while since I have so many fics rn to take care of...

I've had 2 ideas for y/ns butttt I'm leaning more towards one over the other... I have great story ideas for both though!

Idea 1: Y/n is hired to be a Royal Advisor for the king! But wait... This isn't even close to what they signed up for..? They were going to be a simple kitchen hand! How did this happen?! They're too afraid to speak up to the king about it, fearful of getting tossed back into poverty or worse, especially right after being welcomed in and treated to all the lavish living within the castle -- they even have their own room here! Hopefully the king will be merciful as they learn as they work... It's not like they're the only one helping around here, right?

Idea 2: Y/n is hired to be the Royal Jester! They honestly hadn't meant to, but they consider themselves grateful for the position. Free room and free meals? Just by making jokes all the time? A total win!!! It all happened during the celebration towards the crowning of the new King, and said king meandered around town late into the day to enjoy the festivities. He eventually got tired of the constant eyes from his creators that he momentarily slipped into a pub to enjoy being with his people unabashedly. Long story short, a drunk y/n jokingly harassed and goofed around so hard that the King was so annoyingly impressed and tickled that he just had to keep them. They had some guilt about how they acted, but its water under the bridge. Hey, don't blame y/n, they just do what they do best! Jest! And what's a king without a Jester?

DONE... oh my goodness that's so much info... hope that feeds y'all hehe <3

Once again THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I really appreciate y'all and I hope this was worth the wait. :3

🎉🎉🎉

I got a few art things I simply MUST do, so expect those sometimes within the next few weeks, but as always my schedule will be wonky and I keep wanting to start 50 million projects, soooo I stay as the wild card. I do have a lot of life stuff besides college popping up recently and I'm making an effort to be a little less online, but trust that even if there's bouts of silence from me, I will be back hehe >:3

Until next time lovelies! ✨✨✨

[call-sign-shark]

Basic B(w)itch

Game: What does Amos think of your OC? @evita-shelby

Rules: This game doesn’t reflect the author’s opinion but the thoughts of a fictional character. Amos lacks of interest in people and is mean, sarcastic. Beside, this game is not an ego contest nor meant to be a battle. Your character get roasted, we all laugh, and that’s all. PLEASE don’t go like “blabla my character would say this, they would destroy him” like, Idc bro that’s not the point of the game.

• This is a little humbling and fun exercice aimed at making you laugh. A parody of the love and care we have for each other in the fandom. Enjoy 🖤

“Oh look, it’s Miss No-One-Resists-Me! Would you like a cup of Im-better-than-yall? You know, no amount of luxury, witchcraft or fame could cover how boring you are. You and your kin bleed just like anybody else.”

Amos wouldn’t like Eva at all. Contrary to Heaven who doesn’t care but still has an ounce of respect for her because she’s a witch, Amos would simply despise Eva plain and simple, considering her as stuck up. She might be the sweetest with her family and adorable in domestic settings he couldn’t help but find all the fuss around her utterly ridiculous. She’s no better than anyone else. Nor exceptional either. According to him she comes off as a pompous, know-it-all and show off person, who just deserves one huge smack in her face to come down one peg or two. The type of insufferable girl who should be humbled.

Also, contrary to Heaven, the fact she’s a witch doesn’t matter. Not only he’s got one home, but rumors say he steeped in black magic himself. Should he be in the same room as her for political reasons, he’d just roll his eyes and go back to his business or to Hev. The best he could do would be remain coldly polite and formal. Plus, one mutual mentioned a thing about strong women: it’s not something that influences Amos’ opinion.

The only credit he would give her is that he knows what it is to come from an influential family since he’s from the Von Bismarck lineage. Hence, he acknowledges that, sometimes, its a heavy weight to carry upon one’s shoulders.

Sorry for the burn! :) — and no hard feelings I hope, I warned y’all that it would be real roasts 😓 —

[b1acksh33p999]

February Horoscopes: 💞

🔥Aries: This month is going to intensify all areas of romance for Aries! With Venus shifting into a conjunction with your sun sign on the 4th, get ready for this aspect to spice up your love life! Those who are in relationships may find opportunities to fall in love with their partners in a whole new way, whereas single Aries may encounter new people that have them feeling a desire to commit. My advice to you this month is to lean into your romantic side and indulge in all of the opportunities to feel the love surrounding you now. Come next month, Venus will retrograde in this conjunction which can add another layer of feelings in relationship matters. In some cases, exes or past friends may return to try and mend the past. The choice to entertain these random pop ups is completely up to you! However, I don’t recommend allowing these people to come in and break up anything you have solidified now. Stick with who and what you know isn’t going to switch up on you once that transit is over!

⛰️Taurus: This month is going to have you feeling inventive! With Uranus still transiting in conjunction with your Sun sign, and starting the month in an Aquarius ruled degree; you can be sure to feel inspired to try something different. My advice to you this month is to get out of your comfort zone and take a risk on your future! The past that may haunt you is no longer a factor to account for when planning ahead. It’s time to take a risk and know in your heart that if it’s what you really want, then it will pay off!

🌬️Gemini: This month is going to open your eyes up to some new opportunities that could very well present itself to you online! With Jupiter in conjunction with your Sun sign in an Aquarius ruled degree, you could find yourself striking gold online via your social media platforms or by simply getting a lucky deal when online shopping. Regardless of how this may present, you will find luck with online communication this month, and by the 28th this could lead to an epiphany about your identity and personal values. Be honest with who you are and what you’re hoping to create for yourself!

🌊Cancer: This month is going to begin with a strong focus on work and money! With transit mars in retrograde while in conjunction with your natal sun sign, this is causing an introspective aspect to all cancers now as they reevaluate how they fit in their field of expertise, while trying to formulate a plan to maximize their money. As the month progresses, Cancers will indeed figure out a plan that they’re comfortable moving forward with. This newfound confidence will be completely undeniable to everyone around them! My advice to you this month is to use this boost in planning ability to start hatching plans for your future, not only in work and money, but all areas you are wanting to expand on. The time is now!

🔥Leo: This month is going to bring out a variety of emotions for Leo! With the full moon on the 12th, this will cause Leos to reflect on how much their lives have changed since the beginning of the year. The action packed events of last month have left them feeling the need to reevaluate plans they felt were solid walking into 2025. My advice to you is not to fret! Any changes now that appear to have altered your original plans have a hidden motive! In some cases this may be to allow Leo some time to rest before jumping back into their busy routines. Others may have to completely reevaluate their plans due to trying to prove to you how strong your leadership ability is when you make up your mind. This month is simply the beginning of a new chapter for you Leo, embrace the changes coming and know they’re not meant to stop you from getting what you want in the long run!

⛰️Virgo: This month is going to wake you up in what is coming your way! With the south node in conjunction with your sun sign, Virgo has officially entered a period of time where they are reaping karma and being forced to let go of what no longer serves them! This aspect is something Libra just left as of January 2025, so if you need any advice on how to cope with what’s yet to come for you, reaching out to a Libra could be beneficial. My advice to you this month is to keep an open mind when viewing some of what may come into your life over the next year or so while this aspect starts to truly take hold of Virgo. This is not the time to focus on perfection, or what could have been. Instead, focus your energy on something more productive like sculpting the ideal future for yourself. Allow yourself to let go of what no longer serves you and move forward with your head held high!

🌬️Libra: This month is going to have you feeling the need to hustle in silence! With Lilith in conjunction with your natal sun, this independent energy will influence Libra by amplifying their ambitions, while taking a lot of time for introspection and isolation to recharge! This energy is going to prove to be incredibly beneficial for Libra in the long term as long as they steer clear of gossiping behind closed doors. My advice to you this month is to focus your energy on attaining your goals while bettering yourself. Now is not the time to compete with others, or worry about what others think of you. In fact, that will only prove to bring you down at this time. Once we pass the full moon, expect ambitions to rise especially when it comes to fitness, and focusing on improving health. Use this energy surge to your benefit and focus on what you need to be your healthiest self now, and I guarantee it will pay off come the springtime!

🌊Scorpio: This month is going to put some focus on self-love through the love of another person. This is especially true for any committed Scorpios! With Juno and Vesta both in conjunction with your natal sun sign this month, that will prove to be a healing energy while supporting love matters with soulmate connections! Activities like working out with a partner, dates, or even late night conversations will prove to be very healing for you this month. My advice to you is to embrace these moments with open arms and an open heart. It’s the beauty found in the small moments that will be the most healing to your heart and soul!

🔥Sagittarius: This month is going to force you to change your routine in some way! With Jupiter in opposition to your natal sun sign, this is forcing Sagittarius to verbalize their plans for the future instead of sticking to their comfort zone of just simply going with the flow. My advice to you this month is to start this month strong, and formulate the ideal plan for yourself to maximize your time moving forward. This way, you can avoid feeling overwhelmed by life and realizing too late that your goals are suffering by your mismanagement of time. It’s time to get serious about your future and make the most of your time to get yourself exactly where you wanna be!

⛰️Capricorn: This month is going to have you itching for a break! With Mars in opposition to your Sun sign this month, you may feel like planning a vacation or simply taking a few days off work to enjoy yourself. My advice to you this month is to be smart about it! If you have the ability to take time off and get away, do it! Those Capricorns who can’t manage to actually take the vacation or get away could benefit from a fun new experience to help reset their drained mentality. Regardless of how Capricorn chooses to vacation, this very much needed reset could be exactly what helps clear your head enough to come back to work better than ever!

🌬️Aquarius: This month is going to have Aquarius placed in the spotlight, which isn’t the most comfortable place for them! With the transit Sun, Mercury, and Pluto all in conjunction to your Sun sign, this intense energy is the first of many Aquarius seasons to come involving Pluto. This planetary combination is going to push Aquarius away from their routines while inspiring them to do the hard work to transform themselves and their lives into a direction more suitable to where they are headed. My advice to you this month is to use the inspiration found on the full moon on the 12th to further align themselves with who they are now, while detaching themselves from the idea of who they once were. It’s ok if you’ve outgrown who you once were, that just means it’s time to grow!

🌊Pisces: This month is going to be a game changer for Pisces! With a relatively laid back month until the full moon on the 12th, most of Pisces energy will go to catering to and helping others; especially before the 12th, however this can apply to some even after. The most transformational period of the month actually starts on the 27th, during the new moon in Pisces. During this new moon there will be 7 planets/asteroids in conjunction with your Sun sign! This is going to put a heavy focus on Pisces intuition, and increase Pisces natural abilities to manifest. Most importantly, it’s just the beginning because come March, Pisces will officially start to feel the entirely new chapter of receiving gifts and karma owed to them over the last 18.5 years that they officially entered last month when the node shifted into their favor!

[blackcatxmagic]

Sure enough, Copper didn't need Dorothy to reply; he could tell she appreciated the words, and there was a sort of understanding that passed between them. It wasn't always easy to talk about the hard things, and it was even harder to find someone who could fully empathize, so Copper was just appreciating this unexpected connection.

It troubled Copper to hear Dorothy talk about how Cardinal Hill had changed. Until now, he'd kind of wondered if maybe it had just always been like this, and he wasn't used to it yet. After all, this was a town full of witches, so it was to be expected that things wouldn't be so surprising for it to always feel a little...well, spooky here. But to know it hadn't always been like that bothered him, and Copper felt a sense of unease prickling at his skin, as if suddenly he wasn't alone. It was a familiar feeling, that sense of being watched, but it was different now. It was almost like Copper felt as though surrounded by some sinister presence. Usually when he felt this way, it was more like someone watching him through a window or from a dark corner, but this felt like they were standing right in front of him, openly stalking him. And it felt less like a person was stalking him and more like a powerful force. It made him shudder, and Copper hoped that Dorothy wouldn't notice.

Even though this conversation was terrifying, Copper felt a little bit better in a way because he felt more stable, at least mentally speaking. Now he knew he wasn't losing his mind, that something was going on, so he felt a little more like he could trust his feelings. "It feels...dangerous," Copper said, voice shaking a little. "I feel like we're on the precipice of something terrible, and it doesn't help that I keep drawing Death and The Tower." Both of those cards weren't always bad, and Death in particular generally didn't actually mean death. But they both meant something major was about to happen, a transformation or change, and that change was sometimes cataclysmic, especially in the case of The Tower. "Today I drew Death, The Tower, and the V of Cups," Copper told Dorothy, "and I don't know if you know anything about tarot, but...that's not great." Again Copper laughed, though there was still no humor in it; like Dorothy, Copper felt like he had to laugh. If he didn't, he might fall apart completely. He was barely keeping it together now.

"It's okay," Copper replied. "Maybe I should be a little scared. Sometimes fear keeps you safe." Copper had never felt like being fearless was a good thing - you could respect your fear while not letting it rule you, though the jury was out on if he was actually doing that. Fear had compelled him to flee his home and move across the country, after all. "It can't be just us, but is it every witch, every resident, or just specific people?" Copper wondered. "And if it's just witches or just specific people, why? Why us? Maybe it's only people with...well, things in their past they'd rather leave, you know, in the past." Copper couldn't know if Dorothy had any skeletons in her closet, but Copper knew he did; his closet felt like it was full to bursting.

He thought about what Dorothy asked, why they were the ones being affected, and he wished he had an answer. "I think everyone has secrets," Copper said. "And I feel like the person doing this has to know them. The questions is how? And why? What do they want from us?" Copper didn't have a lot of answers, but he thought he did to what Dorothy asked next, kind of at least: "I don't think we're meant to understand it," he responded, "not yet at least. I don't think we're meant to know right now. But eventually...I think we will. Eventually our past is going to come for us." And then Copper shuddered again.

Dorothy appreciated Copper's words. She had a lot of comforting presences in her life, fortunate enough to have a loving partner, and a close family, even if they had their flaws like most others; despite this, Dorothy had left so much unspoken - more than she could even process and understand herself - and so to have Copper speak words that almost perfectly consoled her in the case of some of those unspoken struggles meant a lot to her. As much as they meant to her, however, Dorothy felt as though there was no adequate reply. She had a feeling that Copper would understand.

"I've been here my whole entire life, Cardinal born and raised, and it's never been like this," she explained as Copper confirmed her suspicion: that he hadn't been in town for an overly long time. "I mean, I was away for college, but even still, I visited home, you know? And it's just... Nothing in town has ever felt like this before, it feels so..." Dorothy was almost beginning to grow frustrated at herself as she struggled to find the right words. "It feels twisted, dark."

Dorothy had thought that she was losing her mind, too. It was no secret that her life hadn't been without struggle, and so it wasn't the most far-fetched theory for someone like her to have. Particularly as someone who battled with secrets, Dorothy had honestly been afraid that it might have all built up until she cracked. "What are the odds that the only two people it's happening to have met to speak about it?" She questioned, backing Copper's theory that it had to be happening to more people out there. "It doesn't make sense for it to be a coincidence, but it also doesn't make sense for it to be this isolated. Surely it's happening to all of the witches, if not a lot of us..." she almost trailed off in though. This wasn't happening to the humans too, was it? Suddenly an even stronger fear rose up inside of her. Was Elias safe?

"I'm sorry," Dorothy had to laugh, too. If she didn't laugh, she would only keep on crying, and the last thing she wanted to happen was for word to get around that Dorothy Prior was crying her eyes out in the middle of town. "I didn't mean to scare you, it only made sense," she wasn't going to backtrack and take back what she had said, though she did admittedly feel a little bad about suggesting it. "It would, but not an impossible amount of power," her heart picked up speed as she continued to think about it, discuss it.

"But why?" Was all Dorothy could ask. "I don't understand, what have we done?" Evil existed in the world, and after studying forensic science, Dorothy knew that it wasn't impossible for someone to act violently without motive, but even so, it hardly made sense. You could almost always give reason to heinous acts, even if only barely, and Dorothy couldn't think of any good reason for the whole of the town to suffer. It wasn't like everyone had secrets like her own... "It doesn't make sense. How can you stop something that you can't even understand?" She dabbed her teary eyes with the napkin again.

[mspaint-flower]

could you draw ghost miku, from deco*27?

thanks!

👻

[attractthecrows]

thinking about Alistair in the aftermath of Sy's self-sacrifice where she just left him behind..... he couldn't do anything to save her, he couldn't even see the battle, fuck that must hurt like hell. He can't even GRIEVE. he had someone to talk to about Duncan, but the love of his life gave hers for Ferelden and he doesn't even get the benefit of a few days of privacy because she fucking made him King. he has to LEAD.

but he still goes up to the battleground. he can't not. He has to find her, and he does, and he tenderly, carefully picks up her broken body. Those eyes he loved, closed, that face he loved, expressionless and still. If not for the sickly white shards of bone peeking through her raven hair, the thick dark blood dripping from her nose, she could be asleep. She's not, but she could be. And he carries her - fuck, where??

I can see the well-meaning Andrastian nobility and Chantry priests trying to organize a "proper Andrastian" funeral pyre. But she wasn't Andrastian, and Alistair won't let that happen. No. He watched her bury Tamlen; she will be buried in the Dalish fashion, with cedar branch and oaken staff, and a tree planted for her. A silver birch; her favorite. If he can manage it, in the castle courtyard. What are they going to do, tell the King he can't bury their Hero wherever he damn well pleases?

Even if they tried, I think Anora would back him. Especially if she saw that Dalish ring on his finger, far too small for his hands, but perfectly sized to Mahariel's. She gets it. She didn't get the chance to have a proper funeral for Cailan, after all.

[aroaceleovaldez]

I'll complain about this until the end of time, but I cannot stand the characterization of nico listening to emo music. please give this kid some metal to listen to, if you wanna keep the silly level of darkness that people try giving him with emo music let him listen to some pretentious black metal or something, but there's no way in hell nico would listen to fucking fall out boy

I respect you anon but I am so sorry, I am the exact opposite.

I love the idea of Nico listening to normie emo music cause it's just easiest to find and he's technologically challenged and also he almost definitely got into it because Thalia handed him her ipod one time when he was 10 to get him to shut up for 5 minutes and he ended up binging MCR's entire discography. Also, he's too nice to be pretentious about anything and he's a huge nerd. All that + Rick saying Nico likes technopop, Nico definitely has like a solid couple hundred plays of Rolling Girl on his probably stolen ipod and if you hit shuffle it's a weird combo of emo hits of the early 2010s, Porter Robinson and Mika, and anime OP jumpscares. If circumstances were slightly different he'd be a scene kid.