#I hope these were the answers you wanted
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🥳 & 🚦 for the fanfic ask game! And if you've answered one of these already, your pick 😁
Ooooh, tank you!! <3
🥳 Why did you start writing fanfic?
Oh, well, I’m pretty sure I’ve answered that question many times through different games, and here’s the most recent and detailed explanation I could find, but basically the short answer is that the best Brio fanfiction ever written has ruined changed my life ❤️
(but also haven’t I already told you about this???)
🚦What sort of endings do you prefer to write: ambiguous, bad, happily ever after, etc.?
Definitely ambiguous!! I’m rather an open ending kind of gal, I find happily ever afters overly cheesy and simplistic, and while sad endings are incredibly appealing to me, I very rarely lean on that side because deep down I want my babies to be happy and I’m weak. So I like to leave things slightly unresolved, but most of the time on a hopeful note (although I’ve definitely written endings where the future’s quite uncertain).
Emoji asks
#cordeliapelagia#ask#writing#fanfic#my fic#now that I'm thinking about it I'm definitely positive I've already told you about my fandom origin story lol#probs in the hpi anon thread#but I'm too lazy to try and find the said post#anyway#I hope these were the answers you wanted#😘
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I found your art like right before you started featuring Vasco more prominently in the lore, and seeing the focus shift from "This sad wet cat of a dog man priest is doomed by the narrative" to "this sad wet cat of a dog man priest has a sunshiny gay lover who is his world" has been a fun trip lol
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#ah! so you got to watch this whole thing unfold!#I remember the early reactions to Vasco's reappearance#it seemed like people were cautiously hoping there was some chemistry going on but didn't want to jump to conclusions#I loved how well the first sneaky hidden kiss piece (saving grace) was received#it's one of my personal favorites still#not only because I think it turned out nicely from a technical point of view#but people were so excited to see it#it was heartwarming#answered#anonymous#sad wet cat of a dog man priest#and his sunshine gay lover who is his world#amen
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i needed to express a sentiment in the creative stylings of @dunmeshiminimumwage
#eliot posts#dunme#delicious in dungeon#dungeon meshi#sorry to put toshiro in the roll of shitty job interviewer lmao#but he was the best fit for ''guy that wants me to read their mind''#laios being my internal monologue here#i was on my THIRD interview of the day i was Dying#tho since the prev two interviews i had were for similar positions and told me their salaries outright at least i could use that number#(though tbh my work persona is more of a kabru. my customer service voice is unparalleled)#(at my first job even my coworkers thought i was sooo cheerful til i got too comfy and casually made a joke abt wanting to asphyxiate on a#plastic shopping bag like a sea turtle. in front of my sweet elderly coworker. oops!)#(also this job was during quarantine and after weeks of working together i took my mask off in front of one coworker for the first time#and she called like half the department over from their registers to look at how pretty i was??? prettyboy powers unmatched ig)#(also my first interview today went SO well i charmed that interviewer so good despite my lack of qualifications)#(she even complimented my social skills and said i seemed like the type who could get along well and make good conversation with anyone!)#(which is important bc i was interviewing for an elder care position. also old people especially tend to think i am a Delightful Young Lad)#(unless i accidentally make a morbid joke around them ig lmaooo. or. well. some of them like those too. but not that one coworker lol)#(if only that skill transferred over to actually making friends irl. my autistic ass has so few close irl connections)#(i hope my exceedingly short list of character references does not prevent me from getting hired)#AND ALSO my first job asked the same wage question and i said twelve dollars#and they were like all our new employees start at 7.75#the union insists that we pay all new employees a whopping 50 cents above min wage. (we'd pay less if we could)#like dawg why did you ask that then??? if my answer did not matter at all???
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okay, bc i have seen this argument alot now (and it also seems to be the view point of aonuma himself..) is that "zelda cant do everything link does bc whats the point then"
and i take personal offense on that bc its a stupid argument (in. my. very. personal. opinion.- not judging people for liking it. its a ME thing)
whats the point? its that its her. its still a different character, different in story, background, personality, but i WANT to play zelda and she can do everything link does, why does she have to be so restricted and be bend over backwards to find some new way to make her 'useful' when link gets to do basically everything no questions asked (the only thing thats hers is like .. sealing power and sacrificial maiden, which i find a little underwhelming to say the least), if theres no point to it why are there always modders that model swap link with someone else, and in that case it has even less impact bc its an artificial model swap with no changes to the story (which can and should still be different when its the vanilla game with a different protagonist... its still a different character), clearly theres joy in just the model being a different one- and that isnt even to mention the story possibilities, since, again, its stil a different character
if we ever (never ... i know who we are talking about here) get to play as ganondorf i want to him to be just as versatile and active as link is, if we got a point and click adventure game for him instead bc 'whats the point' id be disappointed too- you can find any sort of excuse/explanation for zelda to be singled out but the fact remains it tracks with how female characters are often treated, and that hits a very sore spot for me
i guess i am unfortunately one of those annoying people that want to see female characters be treated exactly the same as male characters, possibly bc i am myself afab but identify as agender and have a deeply personal dislike for anything 'traditional' feminine bc i cannot and never will be able to truly live as myself in real life, it influences all of my work, my work is as just as much as my opinion on this, very personal
and in line with my point about modding, i see theres joy in just beign able to play as her even if its like this, i get that, i also get it for the creative aspect (though that mechanic worries me even more for the future bc it really seems to be the path now that -freedom = good, linear anything = bad-) it is a different idea and its not like i cant see that value- im not trying be "right" either, just bc i have that opinion doesnt mean i need everyone to agree, its a very personal thing, if you like it good for you! not for me though, and i think both of that is equally valid
i just personally wish she was allowed to be just like link, fight just like him but be different bc its still her and not him in the end- to be physically/playstyle like jsut like him, but you know ... as her, i dont think shed stop being zelda if she could wield a sword just like him
i dont really know how to get my point/feelings across, i dont want to step too much into personal stuff nor spam people with something that ultimately doesnt interest me alot, im just saddened by it really
(EDIT: bc i forgot to add this on here again; this isnt as much of a problem as it might sound like here, just the main topic i wanted to talk about; why im so uninterested in it is MAINLY bc i dont trust them to write anything interesting/care about lore anymore after totk, im always on the more pessimistic side that thinks its most likely worse than id hope and i know even the past games arent perfect or super interestingly written, but now its much more just a general distrust, together with everything like the price ... im just much less hopeful and cant get excited until i see more of it, like im waiting for the game to get out and reveal that its just as much of a mess and money i regret spending- kind of fear)
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#person that send an ask about this in just as i was writing this- this isnt about you- i promise you#its soemthing thats been stirring in my mind since yesterday#and seeing so many of those comments- and even aonuma himself say it#just strikes a very very personal sore spot#also to that one commenter on a different post-#no- wanting female characters being allowed to wield a sword is not “badass female character mysogyni” (idk how to spell that rn)#the hollywood badass female character thing is annoying but thats bc-#its a super model woman (bc shes ALLOWED TO BE FEMININE you KNOW) fight people in high heels- bc you can be feminie AND badass-#and then does a cringy one liner 'what you thoguht a FEMALE couldnt kick your teeth in'#which comes with alot more baggage of tropes and hollywood etc etc#i long for the 'women are jsut as capable as men' in a very agender way#why do you think i intentionally design alot of female characters non tradtionally feminie or masculine#again this is a very pseronal thing to me#BUT i do think it IS questionable that its her that isnt allowed to fight with a sword#like i dont think thats much of my personal dislike there- but a valid thing to point out no matter the explanations you can come up with#anyway- i dont hate it- but its not for me- i dont want to talk much about it#i hope you can excuse me not answering the asks i got related to this- id just repeat myself#(i guess i should be glad that its the top down one that gets her as the protagonist-)#(i dont think i want to live through seeing her be animated like the typically girly feminine butt wiggle in your face tehehe)#(the botw/totk cutscnes were enough of that for me PERSONALLY)#i dont know how many times i have to say its my very biased personally personal opinion and no a judging of others#to make it clear that no one has to agree with me and i dont want to be convinced of the other opinions of this
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Girl, you're an immature aspiring writer (key word: aspiring) who is shitting on Horikoshi's work even though your entire fucking blog is literally dedicated to Hori's work. How pathetic and hypocritical must you be. There is a reason why people rather talk to you anonymously rather than directly because frankly you're an embarrassment and a loser. Your misandry needs to be dealt with. Stop blaming all real life men for you unhappiness with the MHA ending. That the fault of one man, not billions of other men. Just because you're pissed and throwing tantrums doesn't mean you have to blame all men. That's extremely childish though not surprising since you're blog itself looks childish. Why are you even watching MHA, its clearly not for misandrists like you. In case you forgot MHA is a Shonen manga/anime so you're clearly not wanted. You're not the type of audience that Hori wants in the first place. You rather talk about useless characters like Rei Todoroki or squeal about a man's attractiveness rather than the watch and assess the actual fights/battles. Seriously. Stop watching MHA and go watch sailor moon or some shojo shit.
Yo I know, I’m childish and immature that reeeeeeally sucks man. Doesn’t change the fact that you still are a misogynist, abuser and rapist defender, childish, immature, rude, mannerless, ignorant and a gaslighter who came on their own in my childish blog, to ask for my childish opinion though. You did, and are still doing all this on your own accord, so guess who’s the real hypocrite here honey 🤭
#— ❥ kelanswers;#answered#anonymous 😂#and in my blog i’m going to criticize who the fuck i want without asking for you permission babygurl. i’ll start right there 💜#if me criticizing horikoshi for his WACK ASS DISAPPOINTING ENDING has triggered you it’s none of my problem honestly#your feelings are valid but not my fucking responsibility. everyone knows i’m an endeavor hater dude#so you come to me knowing well what you were going to sign up for darling. YOUR choice. YOUR responsibility.#do not blame me for your bad decisions weirdo 😂😂#honestly? you’ve lost credibility AND relevance the moment you started to bark nasty remarks at me over an anime zemer#if you call misandrist peoples who holds men accountable for their wrongdoings then you’re part of the problem btw#and if any male bnha fan who defends endeavor gets triggered by me holding him accountable that says a lot more about you than me really#also yeah i watch shoujos and no i don’t think i’ll stop watching shonens and complain about them whenever i want to. hope that helps 💜#aizawa don’t look
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Hiii I have nothing to do at work so of course I have to day dream about different dark!Bucky scenarios (I do not condone cheating but this is really hot to me aaaa)😩 like imagine your husband and Bucky have always had an ongoing rivalry, They worked together, went to college together, hated every ounce of each other. One night you’re at the bar with your friends when Bucky comes over to you and buys you drink after drink after drink, taking you back to his house. He’s throwing you on his bed and ripping your clothes off, kissing you hungrily. “Get ready baby, this is gonna be much tougher than you’re used to.” “Please.” “Yeah? Is he not satisfying you baby? This pretty pussy deserves to be treated right, luckily I’m here now.” He’s so rough with you, fucking you harshly, the dirty talking is driving you crazy. He’s so cocky and cruel, bending you in several different positions and pounding into you for hours. If only you had seen the camera… (part 2??? Bucky making your husband watch the video 😭) -💒
This, a thousand times over 😵💫 and I can just imagine throwing all the stuff at him that you wouldn't dream of doing with your husband. Maybe your husband really doesn't let you explore your fantasies and if you've got one chance to do that, you're determined to take it.
Especially if Bucky is quite a bit rougher than you're used to while still being so respectful. He got the impression that you're not being fucked how you want to be and he wants to give you everything you dream of when you touch yourself. He's not necessarily rough with you because he wants to be. He's rough because that's what you want.
If he's feeling extra filthy too, he'd fuck you in the bed you share with your husband. You're on your hands and knees on the bed, presenting your glistening pussy to him, enjoying the sensation of him smearing your arousal over the tip of his cock.
"Fuck, do you know how bad I want this?" He hums quietly, trailing his leaking tip over your slick folds. "Do you know how badly I want to press inside you? You've made such a mess. Bet you feel like fuckin' Heaven and he doesn't even appreciate it."
With his free hand, Bucky grabs a handful of your ass, squeezing just enough that you feel it hurt.
"Don't want to rush this though." His tip lines up with your entrance, teasing the little fluttering hole and God, you're desperate. "I want to take my time. Want to make sure every time your head hits this pillow, you remember how it feels to have every. Last. Inch of me slip inside you."
You can't have him wait any longer though so you press your hips back onto him, feeling just the tip slide into you. "Good girl, that's it. Fuck yourself on me. You need this, don't you? You need to be fucked right for a change."
He's not wrong. You couldn't stop now, even if you wanted to so you keep going, taking all of him. The weight of him inside you is delightful.
"Oh God, you're perfect. You feel like you were made for me." He doesn't dare move. Instead, he takes a second to just enjoy the wet heat of your body and the snug fit of you around his cock.
"You are. A fucking. Dream." He tests the water with a few shallow thrusts, rutting his tip against the sweet spot inside you. You're so wet, you're convinced you must be dripping onto the sheets and your eyes roll back in your head at the very thought.
This is how sex is supposed to feel. You didn't think you could crave anyone the way you do now. "Buck, please." You whimper, rolling your hips back against him, pressing him as deep inside you as possible. "Don't be gentle."
You hear him groan and feel his fingertips trail down your spine, making you arch your back into the bed. "Is that what you need, sweetheart? Can tell just by looking at you that you need it hard and fast and rough tonight. I'll be gentle with you tomorrow morning, I promise. Gotta work some of that tension out of you first. Bet you haven't cum in months."
You don't like that he can tell so easily but you're not surprised either. The first sharp thrust knocks the air from your lungs but all you hear is a pathetic sob, followed by the crack of a hard spank to your ass and the blossoming, stinging pain he's inflicted.
You're not surprised that it only makes you wetter.
#asks answered <3#💒 anon#becca writes spice#bucky barnes x reader smut#bucky barnes smut#I've got no words for what I've just written#I think I made myself dizzy#I want to give this like nine more parts eughhhhhh#and I think I'll definitely give it at least one more#tw: cheating#there's nothing I love more than finding someone you just click with#I usually stick with the same hairdresser#but my hair was sitting weird and I was desperate to get it cut so I went to a different stylist at the same place I usually go to#and we just vibed#she's the coolest#within half an hour we were planning how she's gonna tell the new man she's seeing that she's starting her first round of IVF#We talked the entire 3 hours I was there#and she said she hopes her daughter turns out like me 🥺🥺#like no girl I swear you don't#but that's the sweetest thing anyone's ever said
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wait okay so now that you're seriously thinking of publishing, will you be writing a new prequel to game theory with the new 'Canon'? like the story as it's meant to have happened between gwyn, augus, terho and the nightingale, or are we just starting from game theory?
ALSO I'm so glad that you might be publishing the ftv soon for wholly selfish reasons -- you're clearly done writing about these characters, but personally I am nowhere near done reading about them, and I'm definitely not creative enough to write fanfiction myself either, so I'm just stuck rotating the characters inside my head like a microwave😭😭 it's really tough out here!!!
imagine the massive wave of new readers and the new community that's gonna come in once the story's more accessible... IT'S SO EXCITING
Hi anon!
No prequel, I'll be starting with Game Theory (and Deeper into the Woods will be published afterwards as a prequel, just as it was chronologically in general!)
Quite a bit of Game Theory is being edited and new content being added (anyone on the Gary & Efnisien tier can already see about 2,000 words of new content in the first three chapters alone, including new scene/s with Crielle), and some content being removed where it's OOC. The events with Terho and the Nightingale will be explained in Game Theory, with Gwyn likely meeting with Terho (or learning about him) a few times within.
As for Fae Tales, you know, it's nice to think there will be some new readers, and there might be like a handful or two, but there will be no massive wave. It is the least popular thing I've written in proportion to the amount of time I've put into it. Even the AUs have all generally done better proportionately.
It's one of the reasons I've never rushed to publish, honestly. It's a lot of work to put into something that you know will never financially justify itself. To the point where I think other projects are far more viable financially (Underline the Rainbow as a series I actually think would be great, because new, meaty omegaverse has a very intense (though small) fanbase and I think that series would bring more people in).
There would be no massive wave of new readers. I think we'd be lucky to see at most about 10 or 20 new folks, and I'll cherish everyone, but I'm also pretty realistic. More people find all my other works these days than Fae Tales, The Ice Plague is still one of the worst performing things I've written in proportion to length + time + work investment (despite being one of my favourite series out of anything I've written).
I think I'm realistic, and I also think there's a chance that the Fae Tales Verse if published could draw some haters. Most people don't want that level of BDSM in their epic fantasy, unless it's much lighter 'romantasy,' which Fae Tales definitely isn't. There's even a chance I might get my KDP author account suspended because of breaching content TOS/violations.
So yeah, it's a risk, but I'll take it. It's just not a risk I'm prioritising right now, because I can't see a way that the Fae Tales Verse will ever really go that far. Hand on heart, way more people who come over from my fanfiction find Falling Falling Stars and Underline and almost no one (with maybe a few exceptions - I love y'all) goes into the canon these days unless they're older / long-time readers.
#asks and answers#fae tales verse#game theory#it's so generous of you to think there would be a massive wave anon#i genuinely can't see it being many people at all#i'd be truly shocked if more than 100 people bought that series as paperbacks or hardbacks#even of existing fans#i love that series with all my heart#and i know it has other folks who love it with all their heart#but those people can read it for free#and not everyone wants to have something like that on their bookshelves#i was going back through my bookmarks/kudos ratio#and realising that even after all this time#The Ice Plague hasn't had the pick up i hoped it would#and it still looks like#over 3/4 of Game Theory readers have never read through#to Augus' and Gwyn's happy ending in All That We Were#so uh#yeah#i don't find it depressing because i have other series i think would do better once published#it just means it's right at the bottom of my current priority list#until further notice
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How do you think about Frepper? I'm neutral about this ship, but the fans Frepper attitude towards confuses me, Ivy and Freckle have only been dating for a week and know each other superficially, but everyone already thinks that by the end of the comic they will get married, I think differently, I think that in the end they will break up with each other because they are too different personalities, I literally can't imagine that both of them will be happy with each other in marriage, Ivy is assertive and active, on the other hand Freckle is passive and just agrees with Ivy, this is not a guarantee of a healthy relationship where a partner completely dominates the other, plus to all that, I will not forget how their relationship started, Ivy just decided that they were dating, and without asking Freckle's permission, she just KISSED him, again without his permission, Frepper fans think that it's cute, but when I saw it, I thought "what the hell did I just see?", in general, it's strange for me that Frepper fans are okay with such things, of course later Freckle shows attraction to Ivy, showing that he likes her in some way too, but I still won't forget how their relationship started and how Freckle used to try to escape from Ivy when she squeezed his hand tightly and forced him to her …
I'm not against Frepper, but I don't understand his fans who don't see these issues and who treat other points of view on their relationship (like mine) as … um, as nonconformity? Fans from reddit are just obsessed with Frepper, I don't know about other networks but that's how it is on reddit, I think there are people who have my opinion but are afraid to say it because of fans, of course, I met Frepper fans there who normally accept such an opinion, but still there is a feeling that such a opinion cannot be told
Simply put, Ivy and Freckle are a couple that will eventually break up with each other unless there's an event between them in the comic that changes my opinion of this couple, but that's how I feel about Freckle for now. I didn't plan to express my opinion, but it happened that way, I hope you don't mind it
first and foremost, i don’t mind seeing someone express their opinion in my inbox! you and anyone else are free to do so, even if i may disagree. this blog’s entire existence was made for me to share my opinions ( and love! ) for lackadaisy, as well as engaging with other fans, because what else is the point of a fandom blog? and as far as i’m aware, this is unpopular opinion central! most of my thoughts aren’t exactly the ones with the most voice behind them i’ve found, so i welcome all manner of different views. every fan is entitled to their own perspectives and opinions, and should be allowed to share them as they please! but with that disclaimer out of the way, i’m more than willing to discuss frepper in its entirety.
for me, there’s little confusion i carry where it concerns this ship’s popularity amongst the fandom. freckle and ivy, if we are to strip them down to their bare essentials, are a rather stereotypically ‘cute’ relationship : people enjoy opposites ( see zibwick or vikdecai for example ) and there’s an endearing quality found in puppy love dynamics. seeing ivy wear the pants and drag a shy freckle around by his ankle makes for quality content in a way! think the ‘excuse me, but he asked for no pickles!’ meme … ivy and freckle very much fit that sort of mold, and it helps that most fans are too scared to ship them with other characters in the cast too, due to what they perceive to be a lack of options. thus, frepper is an extremely ‘safe’ ship! you cannot get in trouble for enjoying something that is not only canon, but is relatively adorable ; and so i don’t believe a lot of the fans are actually thinking too deeply about the likely endgame of it all. most don’t! it’s fun to ship, and that’s all they really need i think. it’s also very easy to dismiss ivy’s forwardness as a quirk of being a young girl who’s of her temperament, recklessly boycrazy although still carrying sweet intent. this behavior is easier to hand wave when neither ivy or freckle are experienced at the dating scene as well … freckle due to his extremely religious upbringing and hermit nature, and ivy because of viktor’s constant meddling, which would hold her back more than you’d think. with that said, i don’t think any of this is excessively complicated. some shippers are rather simple minded and do not care for details and characterization all too deeply. enjoying dynamics is, at its core, supposed to be fun -- which makes simple ships like frepper prime targets for a very vocal and tight knit fanbase. there are other things i could speculate about why these two may hit so pleasantly for others, like how there’s an underlying queer theme to it ( what with ivy being the pursuer and freckle the shy, blushing flower ) or that it’s tropey enough to hit the right spots for others … though it all boils back to mere speculation. perhaps they still have time to escape this gangster lifestyle and live happily ever after? and that appeals to the lackadaisy fans who still want some sort of happy ending? it’s all a combination of frepper being easy, i think, and containing two young cats who still haven’t done anything particularly ‘unforgivable’ yet action wise. this is a ship you can root for without an ounce of worry in your heart, and so on and so forth.
but although i understand why others are so vocal about them, i don’t exactly agree with fanon’s views either! while i heavily enjoy frepper, i enjoy them as they are, and that includes their looming flaws and inevitable tragedy. they are bound to break each other’s hearts a lot on their current path ; even if they were entirely perfect for one another, this lifestyle isn’t kind to anyone, meaning if they don’t separate, they could always be forced apart via bullets and such anyway. they are young and woefully inexperienced in a manner of things, the last thing they need is the stress of a rumrunner life driving their every action, you know? i know people see them getting out together, and that is likely on the table! i do see that in many ways, but i’m also of the opinion that ivy and freckle will diverge onto different paths at some point and temporarily call it quits. from where the comic currently stands and given my view on ivy’s arc, i see her growing disillusioned with where she is and the honor and fun she saw within it as a royal spectator will fade ; she will become wary, fearful, and her resilience will die … meanwhile freckle will embrace it, similar to his cousin, fully understanding what it is and what he’s getting into ( like rocky, again ) but being unable to leave his refuge. i know lots of people think freckle will leave the lackadaisy first, but given his old concepts and former title as one of mitzi’s ‘trouble boys’, i think he will become lost in the sauce for a myriad of reasons. frankly i enjoy that twist on their relationship! since i believe ivy’s character development will revolve around maturing, changing as time stretches forward, because her character is ever growing, what with her entire schtick being the fact she’s everything a 1920s girl was during those times. she embodies that unladylike youth and manipulative sweetness, so i’d imagine a lot of her path is falling from such naive thrill seeking and stumbling upon a harsh reality. she will mature, and the very thing that should make their relationship stronger will be what divides them indefinitely. everything they have is founded on this bloody, varnished soaked ground after all … they are young adults who are experiencing what closeness feels like outside of family or platonic friends for the first time, so naturally they will overindulge in their own amateur games ; find respite in the boogie and kiss like couples do on the silver screen, laugh about it, talk about everything and nothing at all … relish in each other’s warmth and stupidly loyal protection. i’m sure frepper will grow closer before any falling out, because as it stands, it’s one of the few things they have in such a scary situation that feels comforting and kind. they will impact each other in the fundamental ways first relationships do and, to move towards your biggest gripe, do things they’ll regret or allow things to happen to them that they’re not entirely okay with.
ivy is very forceful with freckle initially, albeit in her typical saturated way ; and i can see why that would be hard to parse! especially when freckle spends a majority of their first scenes together squirming away and hiding, trying to duck her affections and bolt for it. there is a lot of boundary crossing between them! but not in a necessarily malicious way … like most things with frepper, this circles back to their mutual inexperience and how, in a lot of ways, this is their first ‘serious’ romantic relationship ever. and it’s rather common for such firsts to involve gray areas, since neither party is entirely sure of what their own boundaries are just yet! while freckle did appear frightened by ivy at first, it’s important to note that tracy’s mentioned him having a flight response whenever girls flirt with him … he is prone to run away instinctively, which if you consider his extremely religious upbringing, isn’t exactly a surprise. nina would no doubt look down upon freckle engaging with girls his age due to what most girls his age are currently doing in the roaring 20s they’re living in. sneaking out and engaging in illegal activities, dancing in a way that would disgust most of the more traditional and older generation, casually engaging in any manner of sexual activity before marriage, etc etc. and this isn’t even listing freckle’s cagey nature due to an incident we know was bad enough to send rocky packing for years, and fundamentally changed freckle himself at such a young and impressionable age. he is … very troubled! and rather scared of himself and the world around him … at this stage in life, freckle is perpetually unable to make any progress towards anything he may want, and so i have little problem myself with ivy mostly taking the lead. when left to his own devices and allowed to choose outside of influence, freckle did in fact sneak out of his mother’s house to go to the lackadaisy, surely well aware that ivy’s intention had been romantically inclined. so, to me, he has always liked her ; perhaps found her cute, in a shallow way, saw her eccentric behavior as endearing and frightening in equal measure, and while he’s still wading into this whirlwind pool unsteady and shaken, he -- wouldn’t mind it if ivy pushed a little more, or moved him around to her ( and what she perceives to be, their ) liking. perhaps this dynamic is familiar enough to him that it becomes comforting, since rocky was very much the same way in their adolescence. tugging freckle around and pulling his tail for whatever rocky wanted them to do, with little care for whatever his baby cousin desired at the time, ignoring his protests and chasing him ; nobody’s at fault here either, kids are extremely self absorbed and this is a flaw they’ll usually mature past, and while ivy and freckle are adults during the comic, i don’t think ivy’s outgrown this linear view on things just yet. she is extremely entitled! she is used to being the apple of everyone’s eye at the speakeasy due to her jazz baby status as atlas may’s goddaughter, and this gangster connection excites and awes the ladies she attends classes with at her university too. ivy pepper is used to getting her way and this has only fueled her determined attitude, her ‘pull it up by the bootstraps’ mindset, and in many ways, this is something of a flaw for her. it’s not bad to be confident and headstrong, although when you add that into a dangerous mix of rumrunning and gunslinging, it may become a problem rather quickly. but i digress! point is, ivy and freckle are hardly at fault for the awkward way they handled the start of their relationship, when it’s so new and fresh to them both.
neither of them have boundaries at this moment, as they either have no clue what those are or simply haven’t realized they should set them. so, in turn, there are things that the other may do that could cause their partner discomfort … and it’s mostly done out of obliviousness and good intentions and your classic dose of intense affection. doesn’t mean it isn’t messed up to a degree, but i think it’s rather realistic, and is a hard truth that comes with many first relationships of that sort. sometimes you don’t know how to say ‘no,’ or you agree and regret agreeing later, or perhaps you simply don’t understand there’s certain things you aren’t ready for or genuinely just don’t like. again, it’s a very muddied area, and the two of them are vaguely navigating what is mostly foreign to them. they’re bound to mess up! so i ivy some slack here, and applaud tracy on the realistic writing more than anything usually. young love also happens to be a great device to use for inexperienced characters finding themselves, through the good and bad of their relationship, and frepper is all about that. maybe freckle will inevitably bring up how he feels like he would’ve preferred it had ivy asked him out properly, or gave him time to court her in a traditional fashion … and she will be surprised ( and a little wounded ) by this, since she had never considered it before … too used to her way of things to realize there’s another path they could take. i think this aspect of the relationship is important, and i can understand wishing that more frepper shippers would view it as such, or comment on it's morally gray nature without just calling it ‘cute’ and leaving it at that.
tldr : they will most certainly break up at some point, maybe even multiple times! tracy has said before that they both have some serious maturing to do if their relationship is to be long lasting, and i doubt that maturing will happen to them both at once … since they have different things to work on emotionally. but they will probably strongarm some major personal development within each other, as well as love one another with a fierceless abandon that most kids do. i could see them getting married, i could see them not, but i agree that if they were to be wed happily, they’d have significant hurdles to overcome. but personally, frepper is something i adore mostly due to the impact they’re bound to cause each other, and even if they are to separate and find someone new and more fitting, they’ll always remember one another -- perhaps fondly, and sadly, and with some anger. a time they’d like to forget, but a person they’d like to remember … which is my cup of tea overall! they much more interest me as they presently are anyway, where i can fiddle around with their budding romance and friendship bonding. and as lackadaisy grows in popularity, i do hope there’s more frepper fans who see their complexity and flaws and explore them with all of it in mind.
anyway! i hope this was coherent, and that it was obvious that i agreed with you for the most part. i haven’t really talked about frepper before with anyone so many of these thoughts sort of burst out of me! and i feel like i have more to elaborate upon, but for the sake of simplicity i kept this short. oh well! surely this is enjoyable and informative regardless.
#my asks.#lackadaisy analysis.#lackadaisy#freckle mcmurray#ivy pepper#as always frepper fans who just like them for their cute potential is SO valid#ship what you want how you want yada yada! i support you!!#but i’m here for discussing the good the bad and the ugly … so i was very happy to recieve this ask! thank you so much!!#i also understand what its like to share what you or others perceive to be the ‘wrong’ opinion about a ship or a character or something#so you have my sympathies and i hope you find better spaces to express yourself lackadaisy wise!!#anyway. yeah. i do think people are prone to view ivy as extremely experienced due to her many boyfriends!!#but given the fact she doesn’t date them LONG is. well it’s not an accurate assessment.#viktor ( bless his well intentioned heart ) has drastically thwarted that brand of maturity on ivy’s end#and has likely caused a sort of insecurity … by maiming her boyfriends and having them leave her. acting as if she has the plague!#that would hurt any girl’s feelings — if they didn’t know why. and i think these short lived flames have caused ivy to like …#speedrun her relationships? she is very quick to jump in and stay … because she fears the time limit perhaps. which adds to her forwardness#again! she had no idea it was viktor until the comic’s current events where she’s already WITH freckle. which is important to me#she is inexperienced in her own ways … freckle’s inexperience just happens to be more obvious due to the simplicity of it#god this was so fun to answer <3 thank you! again! hope my thoughts on the matter were decent enough#i’ll hush now with my over analyzing ass ( <- is it obvious my fave thing ever is characterization yet? lol )#( also cannot state enough freckle and ivy are Adults To Me. not five year olds!#but saying ‘young’ and ‘kid’ was easier than being like … emotionally immature and stunted adults every five seconds. so!#that is what i went with. for simplicity’s sake. but that are adults!! that is important! just very inexperienced ones )
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i politely demand you talk about your nge/pacrim au!
thank you for enabling my behavior and for all your art omg <33333 i will attempt to coherently and briefly outline my thoughts
the short version is: yuuta/rika saves you post-battle and both are irrationally upset when it turns out that you already have a boyfriend.
yuuta would like to take some of the credit for digging you out the rubble, but the truth is, it was like his mech was on auto-pilot, overriding all of his controls to dig you out of a lifeless environment and stash your cold, limp body in the center chamber until yuuta and rika were transported back to the base.
yuuta doesn’t understand why he lost control of rika like that, nor does he understand why he feels so upset when he goes to visit you in the infirmary and there’s already some other man by your bedside holding your hand. he vaguely recognizes kokichi as a junior engineer who’s done a few surface level repairs on rika, and he’s surprised and green with envy to find out that kokichi is also your boyfriend.
yuuta doesn’t understand the anger he feels, or the headache he gets, or the panic attack that’s threatening to rise in him, or why his feet automatically drag him back to his mech, or why he feels like he could hear rika’s faint sobs and screams in his head and he lay in his pilot chamber. none of it makes sense and he can barely sleep because of it, but it happens every time he thinks about you and kokichi for too long; and strangely enough, if the thinks about how rika seemed to come to life to save you for too long. there’s some kind of missing link he can’t piece together.
when you’re conscious, you can’t seem to recall any part your childhood, and only have your memories from college onwards, save for bits and pieces of the attack you were a victim of. yuuta learns that you were studying to be an engineer, that you were moving to work at the hangar and be closer to your boyfriend, that kokichi was slated to pick you up from the airport that ended up being the site of attack. a small part of yuuta wishes kokichi had been there, thinks that rika wouldn’t have found him in the rubble.
you’re the miracle save, and somewhat become the baby of the hangar. world-renowned pilots you’d only ever studied in class stopped by to give you their condolences, offer their help. you try to remain calm when satoru gojo and kento nanami make an appearance as a duo in your tiny recovery room, calling you brave and bowing to you with a home cooked meal in hand. senior engineers do their best to recover your work from college, assuring you that your injuries and recovery period would be a non-factor in the hiring process—that you were free to start as soon as you felt comfortable. you get the most attention from yuuta, who makes himself a friend, and a critical part of your recovery, essentially firing your physical therapist in favor of fixing you himself.
everyone makes you feel welcome, but yuuta makes you feel safe. he holds your waist while you re-learn to walk, he sneaks you into the pilot’s lounge while the jaegers have their repairs done—and nods in faux-sympathy as you mourn the presence of your boyfriend, who seems busier than ever these days with nuisance repairs, jokes about how yuuji and megumi seem to be particularly reckless with their jaeger lately—he squeezes your hand when you have headaches and fractured flashbacks of your past that you can’t piece together, he holds you when you cry out of pure frustration of not being able to remember who you are
yuuta’s a real smooth talker, too. always knows exactly how to comfort you while your boyfriend is busy, always talks to the press about you so preciously, always makes you feel like you have a purpose even if you can’t remember your past self—maybe you weren’t meant to remember anything before him and rika, maybe it was meant to be this way. it’s a twisted comfort, but it’s something to cling to, it’s better than crying over memories you no longer have.
everyone notices yuuta’s weird reverse stockholm syndrome lol… the way he hovers over you like he’s your sole protector and savior, the way he demands to be privy to all decisions about your health care, the way he remains close to you with no fear of your boyfriend. nobody says anything, though—yuuta’s a pilot, a good one, and one the few solo pilots in the entire world. he’s precious and vital to humanity, worth a thousand men, worth ten thousand engineers. besides, his friends see something special between you two, especially the co-pilot pairs; satoru and kento, megumi and yuuji, choso and yuki—they know compatibility when they see it, and boyfriend or not, you have something special with yuuta. they all share a common thought: kokichi is fighting a losing battle. and even if he could beat yuuta, he’d never win against rika.
#answered#teehee there's So Much Lore that i could talk about but i tried to keep this a reasonable length#and i hope it feels slightly ominious teehee <333#this is really just me bringing back my favorite point to light again: none of the jjk boys are SHIT!#boyfriend>? never heard of him! to yuuta he's YOUR save#he and rika pulled you out of the dirt and snow and brought you back to life... hows ur boyfriend gonna compete with that? he shouldnt ://#he should give up :// it sure would make yuuta's life easier... sigh#also note! the rest of them aint shit either! bc WHY are they rooting for him 😭 terrible#there's so many versions of the au the temptation to truman show it is also there but i think i want that for something different#teehee <333 anyway thank u for ur art my dear !!!!!!!!!!#there's also another version which is simply youre a co-pilot with someone else#and the yuuta comes along looking like a kicked wet puppy and somehow he's like 98% compatible with you#and everyones like whoah what the fuck... which makes u angry bc u were perfectly happy being previously more compatible with ur boyfriend!#and here comes along this LOSER to ruin everything....... love of ur life but a LOSER#yuuta x reader#pacrim au
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#if you follow this blog you already know that i am generally 2-4 updates behind on content#if you don't follow this blog why do you want my opinion on natlan stuff?#and finally: if you are not sure if i've played something you want to talk to me about. you can send an initial ask to ask me#anyway as of this morning i have started blocking for this#asked and answered#(as a filing tag and in the hopes a particular anon will see this)#(not the capitano anon. you were sufficiently vague that i'll just hold that answer until i actually play it. thank you for that!)
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love louis with all my heart but acknowledging that he doesnt know the words to the songs he’s performing and doing nothing about it is just so unprofessional especially since he has said many times how grateful he is that he gets to perform as a solo artist
i just don’t see him making a huge effort in being a better performer for his fans as a huge part of his shows is just him letting the crowd sing. i dont know i just want to rant and express my disappointment. i love him i really do and i want him to succeed in every way but he needs to do better
Hi anon. Sorry to not answer yestarday I think your comment required more time to write something decent, I was barely functioning during the show. This was a really long answer, sorry in advanced for that:
You have the right to feel this way, I always respect every opinion (as long as is respectful), I just don't see him forgetting part of the song as such a problem as you. I guess it was a combination of the emotions of the last show, him not performing the song in a while and just being nervous. I think the reaction for this is completely opposite with you and me, you get frustrated and I think he is endearing and just honest, but I could see your pov if you want a more structure performance.
About him being a better performer, again that is you opinion if you see that way, I just have to disagree with you on this one. I think he is always becoming a better performer each show and each tour.
About the crowd singing, do you mean it for Drag Me Down or when he was sick that they sing some of his parts? If it was with dmd well he forgot the lyrics so he ask for help lol, but again my reaction is opposite as you. If you mean the second option I mean he was sick and didn't feel great, he is making the crowd help him. I don't see that as a bad thing, he can't take a day off if he feels sick (unless is really bad) so he put that feeling aside and still makes an effort to give the best that he can and he is smart enough to know when to sing so he can still have a voice and when to ask for help from the audience.
In my show in Mexico City he didn't sing the last bridge of HOTH, he make the audience sing it and we were so excited singing super loud, we didn't mind. And you could hear it in the livestream him coughing and he still did the best he can, he was amazing at my show and push pass that feeling of being sick to give us to the audience in person and online the best show he can.
If you are talking about in general letting the fans sing, I mean is part of the shows to let the crowd sing or at least in the shows I had been for other artists and it makes it better to have parts when fans can be the chorus for the singer and is also a smart move so the singer can catch a break and breath a little. I guess if for you is important that the singer is always singing without letting the crowd sing or have less moments like that I supposed that could play a huge role of how you see Louis.
About Louis as a performer I just see the whole picture. If you see videos of Louis during 2019 even the first show during 2020 before covid in comparison to 2024 it's insane the difference. In those years Louis was standing in the mic for the most part, he didn't move that much. Even at the beginning of LTWT and at the end of that tour you could see how his confidence as performer grow.
Same with FITFWT at the beginning an the end or comparing LTWT and this last tour. Louis was a different person really. His performance and confidence he shows was incredible to see. He owns the stage, he ask for more energy to the crowd, he interacts with fans, he moves in the stage (in the catwalk he needs to be more there but I hope he does it on the next tour), he has the audience in the palm of his hand when he performs.
I think creating the setlist he did this tour is part of making that much effort to be a better performer as well, to give the best songs as possible and have a different version of the songs live. The live album is also part of that for me, is a huge effort to record shows over 3 years and select a few ones to make an album. He didn't had the need to put a live album, but fans ask for it and he gave us that beautiful gift.
I will always appreciate Louis and the effort he puts in his shows, in his setlists, his sneaky surprises of songs, his beautiful speeches, his mesmerizing performances.
I think besides his speeches this is how he show how grateful he is: the man has tour over 3 consecutive years, we always get content of him, he doesn't have a lot of breaks, he has done a lot of promo for the album and for the latam tour, he is always working to give us so many amazing things, he give us a documentary, premieres of aotv, a livestream etc. For me that is a huge effort, is a lot of work, a lot of him he is putting to the world, is a lot of energy and could be really draining at times, specially going on tour with so many times changes with back to back shows, traveling etc. He still manages to do it and give the best he can and thanks the audience every single time.I will be always thankful for that.
I guess if knowing part of the lyrics for a song and letting the crowd sing are very important for you it could be frustrating to see that. I just don't see that as a problem and I see Louis as performer different than you and that is okay too, we can have different opinions.
I hope you have a lovely day.
#ask#anon#thoughts about louis#louis performance#louis tomlinson#sorry for the long response i just wanted to acknowledge all the things louis does and share my perspective#sorry this is probably not the answer you were hoping for#afhf 2024#afhf mexico
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Hi I'm thinking about writing a h2g2 and gravity falls crossover fic. I saw your post awhile ago and I was wondering if you had any idea on how the two fords would interact.
Oooh this is a really good idea!
Hm, I haven't properly watched Gravity Falls in a while (I KNOW IM SORRY), but comparing their personalities from what i know they have a couple similarities and differences.
For first interactions I'm not entirely sure how or where, neither of them are naturally social but if someone were to start a conversation it would be Prefect, and once they realize they're both named Ford P. they'd hit off perfectly.
I think they'd love to go out for a small drink and talk about their outlooks on life, about space, their own traumas and relationships, about their research and studies with their respective books (Pines to the Journals, and Prefect to the Guide), and about their plans for future. This interaction could also be a lot funnier depending on the tone you wanted to take.
Ooooh they could also rant about their annoying family members (Zaphod and Stan)
They would also engage in an epic game of Dungeons & More Dungeons no doubt
#if you ever end up writing this fic please feel free to send me it when you're ready i would love to see it :)#okay okay im not sure if you were only planning for the fords to interact but a full crossover is immediately interesting me now#hmm maybe the HoG malfuctions with the improbability drive on and it crashes into the mystery shack immediately i think that would be silly#i'm really interested in bill and arthur interactions now as well. they barely have any similarities but it sounds really funny#oh wait they could relate to their world's being destroyed...even though bill's the one who destroyed his own world#i think the pines twins would immediately lose their marbles over ford and zaphod being *real life* aliens#ford prefect would give dipper his copy of the Guide that man would give a 6 year old a laser blaster this is tame for him lol#mabel would be super insane over the fact that zaphod has 2 heads and 3 arms and was also a president and zaphod would. not care#(i head canon he dislikes children)#i think a mabel and marvin interaction would be cool too#uber depressed and uber excited#i also need zaphod and stan relations yeahhhhh 2 greedy often self-absorbed criminals probably wanted across all 4 dimensions#i want to see trillian and arthur summon bill cipher by complete accident because they were bored and they are simply just Normal Guys#neither of them would be surprised to see a floating yellow triangle with a tophat. they've seen too much at this point this would be norma#someone needs to restrain me i've made too many tags#ANYWHO happy writing!! im sorry if i sound demanding you get to choose whatever you would like for your story i just got a little silly#i hope i answered your question enough#h2g2#the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy#ford prefect#gravity falls#ford pines#stanford pines#ask#tumblr asks#lucifers gluttony#lucifers inferno
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Hi! I recently started making a TMNT iteration and I wanted to ask you if you have any questions you ask that help with fleshing out characters, storylines, and worldbuilding?
Wellllll....I'm not a professional. And I'm not trying to be a professional.
So usually the question is "What would be the most enjoyable thing for me?"
And if I have an answer, I start writing or drawing it.
I don't do questions and I don't make clear plans. I just create what I myself would like to see (And some plot holes, too. Of course lmao).
That's it. I'm a pretty irresponsible artist/writer ahah. I just make things that amuse me. And if other people are amused by them too, I'm happy to share
#I'm pretty sure that's not the answer you were hoping for#But that's the way I do things#Somewhere there are much more constructive ways#You might want to look them up#Judging by your question#you're much more thoughtful than I am when it comes to preparing to make a story
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🌷
#‘If you don't want to answer’ anon#yeah it’s a bit to early to talk about it and knowing this fandom it probably will never be the right time either#i tend to agree with you because I’m that sort of person that stands up for others when I feel there is something wrong going on#i like to confront people and I like to make things very clear#knowing this about myself I always struggle when the others dont do the same#and yeah if you keep Louis out of the equation#as you said he suffered from it too but still took the chance to speak up#(even if his fans are nasty and mostly stupid and i tell that with any possible intention of sounding rude and pretentious)#so you know his words fell a but unheard because that rage and hate kept going#i tend to agree with you on that#but they don’t ever talk or take any position like ever#it’s frustrating because you can’t take actions and try your best to soothe such strong negative emotions#and the fact they didn’t and never do… yeah it’s disappointing but also not really?#cause i don’t expect them too yk?#i think that if they were aware of what was going on now they are now already guilty tripping#i hope they’re taking care now but also i hope this is some sort of wake up call#to stop such waves of criticism and anger towards someone unreasonably#and just show support and do whatever you can to protect humanity#with kindness and respect. not only with words you know
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Aaaaange, why doesn't Scar feel safe at that moment? More Tease pretty please? -🎀
oh i can do more than tease for this one :3c
[1,2k ramble + 8,5k rp snippets]
you know how we talked about the post-return situation, with the hermits raising potential allegations against scar? worried that he might be hurting grian, that their relationship is not safe?
that is pre-wedding. that is before scar proposes, but he already has plans to. he's always dreamed of a big, fancy wedding. it'd be picturesque and grand and wonderful! there'd be lots of flowers and music, laughter and dancing. and they'd be surrounded by friends who would be happy for them.
all of this is actively crumbling in scar's hands as hermits shy away from him as if he was dangerous and unpredictable. they're wary, unsure. they no longer see their cheerful, clumsy, harmless friend. they see an unfamilair vex.
they are not happy for them. and, right now, they do not approve of their relationship either.
scar thinks this is not how home should feel like. this is not what he wants. and he doesn't know how to convince them that he's not that scarecrow they have constructed from their lack of understanding. he doesn't know how to get through this.
but it's more than that, right? all their concerns, however well meaning, also make grian spiral. there's so much stress put on the two of them suddenly, their relationship straining.
none of this was ever meant to happen like this.
it's at a point when grian starts finding his stability, after that big breakdown, that scar decides he's done hiding and running, too. if he has to convince everyone to like him again, then he will. he'll fight for this. he'll do his best so that they can overcome this.
him and grian decide to host a little sleepover. for selected hermits! that way, they'll be opening themselves up to others. they want to try and show the others who they are now. to invite them back in. to let them get to know them all over again.
they arrange for it to happen within a week or so, as they still have to make a dedicated room for it. it's a lot of people to hang out and sleep!
they dedice to repurpose their old bunker. yes, the one they constructed shortly post-rescue. the one that was their hideout, their safe place.
it's underground, its walls drenched with anxiety and uncertainty. grian itches from it all, now used to spend time in their nest-tower, high up above the ground. underground feels stifling, all of a sudden. it feels wrong.
the first thing scar does is break the ceiling, to make a big skylight. it's left open for now, sand smelting into glass.
they struggle with the concept of hosting an event for many people. they can't seem to remember what they need. desperately, they try to figure out ways to make the place seem cozy and non-threatening, both for show and for their own sanity.
they talk about a little flower patch in the middle, right underneath the skylight. something bright and nice smelling and alive. they talk about mood lighting, about fairy lights and a fireplace. and—
they talk about sleeping arrangements.
grian says he doesn't want to make a big nest. he... doesn't want the others in their nest.
they're not flock.
they no longer feel like family.
so instead, they try to figure out how many beds they need. except, grian still wants a nest! for him and scar. and, maybe that's good! that'll be another stepping stone, showing the others the new them. who they are. what they now need. things like that!
while scar is tasked with making the small garden, grian goes off and gathers things for beds. he starts making them, quickly becomes overwhelmed, and instead starts putting together a big net that will hold their nest-bed suspended in the air.
he might be ignoring some symptoms of sickness that he simply brushes off as stress. a bit of tension. a couple of anxious, sleepless nights. it's fine.
(it isn't fine.)
it's when they take a break that grian finds himself too lightheaded and needs to lie down.
it's only about half an hour or so later, in the middle of them talking about some of scar's previous relationship experiences, that grian starts to feel really dizzy.
he has a fever.
and he succumbs to it fast after this.
scar wants to take him to the nest upstairs, but grian says he is too nauseous to be moved, so scar does the next best thing: cocoons grian's shivering, curled up form in blankets.
and he messages the hermits.
the hermits, who think he might be doing bad things to grian.
he tells them they need to postpone the sleepover.
he tells them grian is sick.
he asks for soup, but says not to come inside.
it... doesn't sound good. it rings some alarm bells in the heads of those hermits that are Very Concerned and Very Confused and maybe a notch paranoid. but scar stops replying. he's busy dealing with a sick grian.
and hoo boy.
grian's fever climbs sharply and mercilessly, making him delirious and disoriented. he can't tell where or when they are. he keeps talking about things that have already happened. he asks if the world is ending again. he thinks him and scar will be tossed to different servers this time. he asks for [REDACTED]. he asks for flock. he asks for kane and nico, where are they????
scar's heart is splintering and tearing to shreds as he tries to keep a grip, navigating heartache and mirror panic, trying to calm grian down.
it's at this time there comes a knock at their door.
scar can't deal with the others. not right now. not now, not now, not now.
they don't ask for permission to come in. they don't take silence as a no.
grian chirps in distress, from beffudled memories alone, and— they're worried. they can't leave it be.
they find the hole that was meant to, eventually, be a skylight.
they drop down.
mumbo, worried out of his mind. tango, here to help. impulse, last-minute joining them just to keep things reined in.
scar knows grian is out of it. he knows grian didn't want anyone else in their nest.
these are intruders.
and all grian registers are voices. all he thinks of are hunters. he sobs, terrified.
but to the others? scar's shifting into a vex form, flickering and dangerous, clutching grian who's making distressed noises, shielding him from sight.
they need to check up on grian, but they're not allowed any closer.
of course this escalates messily. and scar's afraid and hurting, but he needs to protect grian, and they aren't seeing him anyway. they don't see that he's scared. they don't see that he's cornered and helpless. they don't understand grian's current headspace, or his experiences that dictate his feverish panic.
and there's no space to explain.
... you know what. have the rp bits. as a treat <3 (this starts at the impromptu end of conversation about scar's past relationships, just for context.)
i decided not to redact some bits, for your enrichment. and to feed into the chaos. you're welcome :3c
------ RP STARTS HERE ------
SCAR
Scar takes another moment just to run his fingers over Grian’s forehead, then back into his hair, carefully folding his bangs back. In a lot of ways, early days with Grian were like that. Sharing their passions, enjoying each other’s company, nothing but fleeting touches between them that Scar would be left thinking about for days.
He thinks he may have always been a hopeless romantic.
But is it really hopeless if the man of his dreams is here before him now? Curled up in his lap and cooing so soft?
Scar hums, pleased, even if he obviously wishes the sickness weren’t part of it.
“Eventually she was invited to some exclusive server, real far off. She didn’t know when she’d be able to see me next, so… we decided to go ahead and split.” Scar says it all so casually, because it truly was a mutual decision. One of the few relationships that ended with no misunderstandings or disappointments.
Well, it was still a little sad, but they knew it was for the best.
She didn’t want to leave Scar waiting, and he wanted her to feel open to exploring her relationships to the fullest with her new server mates.
“I knew dating was always sort of secondary to her. Not as important as her art. She could do without it easily, especially if she was going somewhere with a bunch of other artists.” Scar looks down, carrying that soft smile and directing it toward Grian. “And she wanted me to be able to move on, so I could eventually meet, as she called it, the One.” He grins, remembering that being her exact phrasing. “…and that’s you.” Scar flushes a bit at his own cheesiness. “I know it.”
--
GRIAN
grian sighs softly at the touch through his hair, relaxing even through his shivers. his teeth chatter a little, a small frown forming between his eyebrows, but it softens a little as scar continues talking.
he tries to slot the information somewhere in his head. that this was an amicable breakup, brought on by insurmountable distance, diverging life paths. that this is something scar can still remember fondly. that this person had every trust that scar will find someone right for him, and that scar is convinced that someone is grian.
but somehow, his thoughts snag and loop, a faulty wire somewhere. distance and far away servers. distance and—
all of a sudden, he's thinking about the apocalypse that took everything from them. everything but each other, eventually.
he thinks of distance, and a faraway server.
and scar not being with him in that scary place, or grian not being there with scar.
he takes a sharp breath, head shifting and eyes opening. his gaze is feverish and intense as it finds scar. "i would've look'd for you ev'rywhere," he says, hushed but urgent, completely nonsensical.
--
SCAR
Scar tilts his head, confused. He can tell what Grian is saying is drenched in adoration, but it feels misplaced, like it doesn’t belong here in this particular conversation.
Scar isn’t so sure he’s going to get an explanation with Grian in this state.
“I’m right here,” Scar decides to say instead, voice soft like flower petals placed over his skin, hoping to ease whatever tension is lingering in Grian’s thoughts.
His thumb brushes just in front of Grian’s earwing, not quite touching, but grazing over those tiny feathers that permeate his skin.
“Right here.”
--
GRIAN
grian's gaze softens, some intensity fizzing out, even if the feverishness stays. "right here," he parrots in a weary but fond whisper, audibly relief laced. his eyes close again and he tilts his head further, chasing the touch of scar's gentle fingers.
--
SCAR
Scar’s glad to see Grian close his eyes, knowing he likely needs the rest. To think he was building beds and nets when he was slowly succumbing to a fever just makes Scar sad.
“For good, too,” Scar adds on, humming. “If you’ll have me, of course.”
He sees his communicator buzz— it had been a few times during his story— and wonders if that means soup is here already. With a name like soup group, maybe they had it ready-to-cook.
Slowly, he shifts one hand over to take it, just to make sure he was clear about not entering the house. He’s careful to maintain soft patterns with his other, not wishing to disturb his mate.
--
GRIAN
for good. that sounds wonderful. it feels like a nest built around him.
grian coos, velvety and quiet, nuzzling weakly against scar. he feels him shift, but the attention to such details is slippery to grian's mind, especially as scar's touch remains on him, tracing gentle patterns.
--
SCAR
Scar stills for a second upon reading his messages, only drawn back into focus by the soft coo that escapes his mate’s lips. He’s quick to continue his soothing, setting the communicator down atop a half-squished pillow with a plop.
<PearlescentMoon whispers to you> Soup delivery!
<GeminiTay whispers to you> Anybody home?
<Skizzleman> anybody seen G?
<impulseSV> Skizz
<impulseSV> Don’t
<Mumbo> Did something happen??
<GeminiTay> He’s just sick!
<Tango> …sick huh?
<impulseSV> Here we go again…
--
GRIAN
with no idea about the turmoil spreading across the server-wide chat, grian stays curled up, leaning on scar. the silence stretches, making the space feel heavier somehow, time oddly slippery.
grian doesn't like it.
he lets out another coo, this one less stable. there's a questioning edge, something insecure and sorrowful and afraid.
--
SCAR
Scar blinks rapidly, eyelashes fluttering a bit as he tries to recalibrate. He can't bother with that nonsense right now, Grian needs him. That's his only priority.
"You okay, G?" Scar asks, carefully curating his voice with his practiced honeyed tones. "Soup's at the doorstep. Should be fine to leave it there, though."
--
GRIAN
soup's here?
grian forgot all about the soup. why's it at the doorstep?
he can't think.
he lets out another coo, pitched similarly to the last.
--
SCAR
"...Are you hungry?" Scar tries to guess. "I told them to leave it there for now. I'm sure it'll stay hot."
--
GRIAN
grian's getting increasingly more confused. who brought the soup?
they're... underground, right?
there's this horrible moment when grian can't tell where they are. or when.
"... why d'n't they c'me in?" he murmurs, thinking feverishly about flock. about nico and kane, and their worried faces.
--
SCAR
"You...you said you didn't want anyone in the nest?" Scar replies, nervous now.
Did he misinterpret that? Did he just cause turmoil in the chat for no reason?
--
GRIAN
grian looks at scar again, his gaze unfocused even as he searches scar's expression for answers that evade him. he's so confused. flock is allowed in the nest?
he chirps, unable to put the mess of his feverish, disoriented thoughts into words.
--
SCAR
"Shoot," Scar says, doubting his actions now. "I—I can message them again? I think the messages from Pearl and Gem were only a few minutes ago—"
--
GRIAN
grian stiffens, his eyes widening with more confusion.
peal and gem?
it takes him an odd, hollow moment to place those names, and then he's unthinkingly moving, rolling over, chirping in a higher pitch. the cocoon of blankets tangles around him, keeping him right where he is, unable to flare out and flap his wings.
--
SCAR
Scar is about a moment away from grabbing the communicator when Grian begins thrashing, and he quickly shifts to cradling him with his arms, trying to keep him in place. "Hey, heyyy, whoa... easy there, birdie, what's wrong?" Scar tries to imitate a small chirp, trying to say that it's okay if Grian can only make noises. He'll try to interpret to his best ability.
--
ANGE ( :D )
--
GRIAN
grian breathes heavily from that small amount of exertion, completely placated by scar's tight hold and the familiar rumble of his voice. dark spots blotch out his vision, and he lets himself go limp, cradled by scar's arms. safe. safe, safe, safe.
his head is so jumbled, and everything feels like a horrible dream. they're underground. there's meant to be flock here. there's meant to be—
with eyes flooding with confused tears, he whimpers. "scar?" his voice is hoarse, breaking midway through. "where's avi?"
--
LINK
--
SCAR
Scar's huddled over Grian, as if he wanted to shield him from the world. (He does.) He keeps his grip firm and shushes him softly, trying to reign him in as much as he can so he can get some sort of coherent answer, when—
Oh.
Oh no.
"Where's—" Scar chokes out, completely caught off guard by the question. He pulls away, catching sight of those tears, and suddenly his eyes are stinging as well. "I—Grian, we're..." He can't answer that. He can't, he can't. "Grian we're home."
--
GRIAN
grian's gaze jumps between scar's eyes. incoherency threads through his veins, spilling across his nervous system. the word home makes no sense to him.
he chirps, a quiet, mournful, quivery sound. confused and afraid.
--
LINK
--
SCAR
Scar chews at his lip, trying very hard not to lose himself to the sudden flood of panic that surged through him at those words, not to mention the sheer misery of it all as well.
"We're not there, Grian," he continues to try. "We're home. We're—"
He hears knocking at their door upstairs.
Scar's ears twitch, honestly unsure if Grian will hear it as well with how Scar is huddled over him and with the less acute hearing.
Muffled voices pool in from beyond the stairs.
...not gonna answer. ... just wants to be sure ... if it makes him feel better...
"...on Hermitcraft," Scar finishes, the word almost bitter on his tongue.
--
GRIAN
"i— but—" grian's oblivious to knocking or potential intruders. he sniffles, a tear falling free. he's shaking, the fever ravaging, the world gently spinning off axis around him.
he thinks scar looks a bit panicked, and it just pushes him deeper into his disoriented confusion. because— aren't they hiding? from danger? aren't they in a hideout? in a bunker, or a cave? aren't they in a nest that's incredibly makeshift, put together in a rush?
... isn't there meant to be flock here?
he chirps again, louder, still that higher pitch. fear sears through the sound, his breath turning rapid as his heart beats wildly against his ribs, even as fever presses the heavy weight of exhaustion right over his chest.
he's scared, because he can't remember. he can't remember what happened—
"where are they?" he insists, his voice verging a sob. "where is flock?"
--
SCAR
Scar thinks the voices stopped for a second after Grian chirps, and the reality of the giant hole in the ceiling sets in on Scar all at once. All they’d have to do is walk about the back and there’d be nothing keeping anyone from seeing the two of them.
Scar’s wings flare out around Grian as an instinctive shield.
Grian is asking about flock, and…
Well, the reality of that is that there is none here, Scar concludes dismally.
Grian didn’t want the hermits in their nest when they were constructing the party room. Grian asked for Avi. Grian’s probably thinking about Kane and Nico, too.
The hermits haven’t gotten there. They don’t know avian-brained Grian.
“[REDACTED],” Scar answers, trying to give Grian a shred of reality to grasp onto. [REDACTED]
--
GRIAN
[REDACTED]?
grian's mind spins, the same way the room spins around him. he feels as if the whole ground tilted with them on it. there's sea underneath the raft of the floor.
he feels sick.
he wants to close his eyes, but he finds himself staring at scar, helpless. floatingly, he remembers words about distance and faraway servers, and he thinks of hermitcraft imploding, whole chunks being lifted up into the air.
his stomach twists and lurches. the spinny feeling makes him think even more vividly of those floating chunks. maybe they're on one now?
he ducks, as if the ground really moved from underneath them. he tries to paw at scar, but his hands are still trapped, and it just makes him thrash again against the blankets, whimpering.
he wants his flock. he doesn't understand where they are.
"call them back," he whimpers. "call— avi. can— avi can come too?" he pauses, his breath stuttering as he looks up at scar with so much pleading.
he wants a bird flock. he wants to tuck him in the middle of the makeshift nest and make sure he's safe.
--
SCAR
Scar stares at Grian, heart actively tearing itself apart at his words and tears threatening to fall.
He hears footsteps.
He can’t do this. If they find them he’s not going to be able to untangle all of this in time, he—
“They’ll be back,” he lies, chest aching. “Shhh, shhh, listen, they’ll be back, okay?”
The words taste like acid on his tongue, burning his throat like rotten bile.
“You’re sick, Gri, let me take care of you,” Scar pleas, shutting out his surroundings so he can focus. Focus. Grian’s the only thing that matters. “Why don’t we go upstairs? If— if you puke on me, fine, I just— you should have a bath. And more blankets. And Mr. Beak.”
And medicine on his way up. And soup.
And away from the approaching hermits. Away from danger.
--
GRIAN
"they'll... be back?" grian repeats, in the smallest voice, each syllable threatening to snap and let it all crumble. he sniffles, another tear tumbling down his cheek as the confusion continues to tear a path through him like wildfire.
scar says their flock will be back.
he says grian is sick, and oh, maybe the world isn't ending, then?
grian feels weird. everything's fuzzy and nonsensical, memories fading and time slipping and everything melting together.
there's a sob, and it takes grian a moment to realise it came from it. "it— it feels like—" his body shakes and trembles, barely a separate thing from the shivers. he's curling up again, making himself small. with a ragged breath and tears glistening in his eyes, he looks at scar, completely missing his point about upstairs and a bath and mr beak. what leaves his lips instead is a question that's white-hot, shaking him to his core. "scar...? is the world ending again?"
--
SCAR / MUMBO
“What—“ Scar is reeling from all of this. It doesn’t feel unlike being trapped in a cramped terracotta bunker listening to Grian murmur thoughts of death and despair. “No, Grian, the world isn’t ending.”
Scar thinks he knew how to handle this better once upon a time.
This world has ironically shaken his confidence.
“We’re perfectly safe.” Scar continues. “We’re in our home— our house that we built.”
“Grian?” comes a voice from above, causing Scar to bristle.
His eyes flick upward and catch sight of a nervous pair of eyes peeking over the dirt hole.
Scar does not want to talk to Mumbo right now.
--
GRIAN
grian's eyes close and he blindly curls towards scar, deeper into his hold, lost and despondent. nothing makes sense, not even scar's reassurances.
out of all the words scar says, grian wants to hold onto one the most: safe.
and yet incoherent threats continue sinking teeth into grian's flesh. sending panic signals about how he's weak if he's sick, and they're a target, and they can't run from danger. about how their flock is missing. about how they might be hurtled into different, faraway servers this time, and— and grian doesn't know how to survive without scar, and—
he sobs loudly, his breaths becoming erratic. he hears his name, but it's not scar's voice, and he flinches hard, whimpering, until some instinct catches up and tells him to run. to grab scar and abandon the nest.
he tries to flap his wings, but finds them bound.
he doesn't process that sensation right, pitching straight into memories of traps and nets, chirping high pitched and distressed. the blankets don't hold too hard, but he just can't figure them out, unaware of what they even are.
--
SCAR / OTHERS
“Grian!” Mumbo exclaims, calling the attention of his other unwelcome companions.
Scar snarls, luckily muted and hidden from view by his bright wings. This is not what he needs right now. This is not what Grian needs. He needs peace and quiet and warmth and soft things—
Scar hurries to try to still Grian, shushing him as calmly as he can manage. “Hey, hey, Grian, it’s me, it’s okay, shhhh, please calm down.”
Grian said he felt nauseous. This has to be about the worst thing possible for him.
“Scar, what’s—“ Mumbo is babbling, sounding nearly as panicked as Grian. Scar doesn’t care about that though.
He thinks maybe Mumbo has fallen onto his knees up there. He thinks he might be considering popping down into their space.
Scar is not having that.
Strangers are not allowed in the nest, get out, get out.
“Grian, look at me,” Scar tries, urgent and insistent. “We’re safe, we’re okay, I— I’m gonna take you upstairs.”
“Whoa there, skippy, I don’t think you should be taking him anywhere!” comes Tango of all people.
Scar eyes glow a faint blue, feeling cornered, while all of his body language shifts into that of defensive and protective, wrapped around Grian fully with his wings blocking the intruders from view.
He desperately attempts to lift.
--
GRIAN
grian sobs, quieter, against scar's soft, frantic shushes. he wants to believe that everything's okay, but scar doesn't sound okay, and there are all these other voices, rising up and loud, coming closer.
scar pleads for grian to look at him, and dizzily, he does, his eyesight blurred by hot tears. he's breathing too fast, which is just inviting more lightheadedness; he shakes in scar's grip, whimpering as scar repeats the promises that they're okay.
desperately, grian tries to hold onto that.
he chirps, still distressed but now also pleading, a sound meant only for scar's ears but all too loud and grating to not be heard by anyone else in the vicinity.
his wings still feel so horribly bound.
he chokes on a sob. "scar, help."
he needs to be freed and— and they need to run, right? they need to go? scar says they'll go upstairs. grian tries to get his hands free, wanting to hold onto him, but he's bundled up too tight in scar's arms to really manage with his feeble strength.
his stomach churns, acidic, turning and twisting with the uptick of stress and panic. he sobs again, terrified that they're about to be caught.
--
SCAR / OTHERS
Focus, Scar thinks frantically. Focus, focus.
He can’t let the anger from the intrusion overcome him. He can’t get defensive here, even if he’s certain one unwelcome step into their makeshift nest will set him off.
Grian is squirming in his arms, chirping as he relives some phantom experience, and Scar knows this can’t look good. He has to stay calm, he has to keep him under control.
But then Grian begs for his help and it’s like the mirage shatters around him, except this time it’s reality fragmenting before his very eyes, twisting and mutating into something horrible and so much more dire.
Grian’s sobbing, but for a second Scar sees him despondent, face torn open and wings drenched in blood. He hears voices and it’s like white noise, a vague threat, unwelcome.
Scar looks around frantically.
He doesn’t know which way Nadia is—
“Scar, buddy, hey, why dontcha just put Grian down and we can aaaaaall relax—“
Scar’s wings flare out to their full span, one dipping over Grian as a shield. No one can see him. No one can ogle those feathers. No one, no one.
“Sc–Scar, what’s going on?”
Scar sees movement. Someone jumps down and instantly he’s crouched low, holding Grian tighter as his eyes glow blue.
“Scar…”
He’s supposed to be calm, he’s supposed to be gentle, he’s failing, he’s failing, but he can’t let them near—
Scar’s entire body flickers blue and he bites his lip hard enough to draw blood.
“Stay back,” he strains through sharpened teeth, voice low like a snarl. “You—“
(You aren’t welcome here.)
(You’re making things worse.)
(You’re lucky I don’t slay you right here and now.)
Scar’s voice breaks, desperate and frightened by his own shattering psyche. “You’re scaring him.”
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
the sense of danger continues building up around grian, fueling his fear, overexerting his already sickness-weakened body. his heart continues ramming a fast, painful rhythm, and the ache across his chest just serves to make grian more scared.
scar's hold on him is firm, and grian doesn't know whether to feel comfort (he's protected, it's okay, scar's got him), or more panic (there's a threat, scar can't fight if he's gripping grian, why aren't they running?) choking on sobs that he's unable to stop, grian presses his forehead into scar's shoulder; the heat of his fever can surely be felt through scar's shirt, scalding hot. there's a familiar, faint tingling, something grian's learned to attune himself to and recognise—the electrifying current of scar's magic, a warning, a preparation. a wing slings in front of grian like a glowing shield.
mumbo's standing in the bunker, jolting still at scar's accusation and the display of his vex magic. "i'm scaring him?" he stammers, incredulous and not understanding. "mate, i think he's asking to be let go," he hazards, navigating the distressing pitch of chirps and sobs with anxious misguidedness.
tango's now crouching at the edge of the hole, also intending to descend. "yeah, just let us see him. you've got nothing to hide, right? why make this worse?"
a third pair of footsteps makes it to the unfinished skylight, peering down at the situation with a tense "uhoh," trying to read what exactly is happening here. he isn't sure yet, but some alarm in his head goes off.
with straining breaths through his sobs, grian's dizziness only gets worse. even as he's securely held, he can't escape the violent sensation of the world spinning fast. his stomach tightens, burning with acid, stress overloading all of grian's already muddied senses. there are voices around him, louder, closer, but they don't process right; they're just an incoherent noise, a call of hunters saying we found them, making everything collapse in on him and scar. it feels like they're surrounded and, fearfully, grian presses himself further against scar, burrowing in as much as he can with all his limbs still tangled into the blanket net.
he should've been more careful.
he shouldn't have triggered the trap.
his eyes are tightly shut, overflowing with tears. behind his closed eyelids, he can see, vividly, avi's terrified look as he's caught in another trap.
a vile kind of panic spreads through him, sharper and more damaging than the previous one, drawing a terrified chirp out of him. the sound breaks on a sob like waves violently crashing into a jagged cliffside, and he desperately tries to take a breath through it all. to speak.
it's awful; he's so horribly lightheaded and nothing makes sense. but he has to— he has to say this, has to make sure scar hears, has to beg for this one thing above all else. he chokes out, wobbly and halting and small enough to be coherent only for scar, and only if he can spare enough attention to listen. "ple— please don't— don't le— leave him behind—"
--
SCAR / OTHERS
Scar tenses, briefly glancing down at Grian as he wonders whether or not he truly has been misinterpreting it all, if Grian wants to be let go like Mumbo claims. But no, Scar can feel that feverish haze pressed into his shoulder, desperate and clingy, and his expression sharpens, eyes narrowing in Mumbo’s direction.
No, Mumbo knows nothing.
Still, Scar shrinks under Tango’s accusations, reminding him that he ought to have nothing to hide. He doesn’t, just— he can’t let them see. He can’t let anyone see the tears and the panic and the bright violet hues.
Scar knows he’s being irrational but his wings simply won’t budge, one flung out in some innate danger response and the other curled around like a very necessary shield. They twitch but don’t move.
All Scar can manage is to turn them slightly transparent. A barely willing compromise.
Even his vision is flickering blue.
…Grian’s words make him see white.
He’s vividly tossed back in time, hobbled over and bloodied, barely hanging on, watching as [REDACTED]
Grian’s begging him not to let history repeat itself, he knows, he—
Scar takes a stumbling step backward, blankets curling around his feet and threatening to drag him down.
“Hey, hey, hey, let’s not go going anywhere, pal,” Tango insists as he leaps down to join Mumbo, carefully touching his shoulder in solidarity. He’s jittery here, not liking he prospect of staring down an angry vex in the slightest, a totem gripped in his other hand. “We’re just here to help.”
Tears break past Scar’s eyes and he hiccups, struggling to stay above water, barely grappling with reality as it continues to shatter before him.
He can’t do this alone. He’s scared, he’s slipping, he’s making it all worse.
He… he should have nothing to hide.
“He’s sick,” Scar pleads again, voice hoarse and not at all his own. Blue wisps escape with every word. “He–e has a fever, he’s not— he’s not thinking straight.”
God, are they going to believe that?
Do they believe anything he says? That a crazed vex says?
Scar looks at Grian again, desperation hanging off his tongue. “Grian, you— I—“ He doesn’t even want to suggest it, but they probably need to hear from him. “We…we’re safe, okay? I promise, I… d-do you want me to put you down?”
--
US
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
scar's suggestion is the only thing grian hears with any semblance of coherency, and it makes his lungs spasm and his heart ache. he shakes his head in panic, forehead still pressed against scar, the sharp motion rapidly destabilising the world around him until it spins in a nauseating blur. "no no no don't leave, please, don't don't don't," he chokes out, crying.
the sharpness of that reaction freezes mumbo, sends everything in him careening into doubt.
it's this moment impulse takes his cue to join in. he jumps down, touching tango's arm just as tango is taking a breath to speak, feet moving to step forwards. impulse stops him, gently, even as tension drips from his voice. "tango, wait."
grian's sobs fill the air; the transparency of scar's wings doesn't offer much more clarity. all impulse can tell is that the avian is shaking.
but his eyes draw higher, meeting scar's. his gaze softens at the sight of tears, and he lifts his hands up placatingly, the gesture feeling like lowering of a weapon. "scar." his voice is quiet, just loud enough to be heard. he tries to keep it calm, even as his nerves are fraying with the situation. "you aren't going to run off with him anywhere, right? it's okay. we won't hurt you guys."
mumbo's eyes widen at that, gaze whipping from impulse to scar—for the first time noting the tears in the vex's eyes. "oh, gosh, no, we aren't here to hurt anyone!" he echoes, distraught.
--
SCAR / OTHERS
Scar tightens his grip, pulling Grian up higher and whispering soft nothings, assuring him that he’ll stay, that he hears him, he wouldn’t leave him, not ever.
Scar tenses up when yet another person enters their space, but visibly relaxes when he recognizes Impulse’s voice, something steady and yielding to the way that he speaks. It’s the only voice that doesn’t distort into that of a hunter’s call in Scar’s rattled mind.
Slowly, Scar pulls his leg back in, shaking as he gives up on the half-step he was taking away. “I… I know that,” he fibs, because part of him doesn’t believe them. “But Grian doesn’t. N–not right now.”
Tango appears unconvinced, making a short grumbling sound that Impulse cuts off with a light shove.
Impulse recognizes this scene. Maybe it’s just the flicker of Scar’s wings, but Grian appears to have that same glossed over look in his eye that he had the day they found them— unrecognizing, inconsolable.
It isn’t good.
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
grian's sobs quiet down a little at the soft assurances, but the world keeps swirling and swimming.
mumbo lets out a choked noise, not willing to reconcile with the idea that grian might not recognise them as safe—despite all the hints of their early days on the server post-rescue. he thinks of grian, bruised and bitten and flinching, and he can't let this go. he can't. "please," he begs. "i just want to see him."
impulse looks at mumbo, then back at scar. he's holding out his arm, in case the others would have the stupid thought of moving forwards.
he needs to bargain here, and it's hard.
he tries to hold onto the way scar let pearl at least somewhat close, that day when they pulled scar and grian from that awful world, grian's wing tangled in a horrible trap that tore at it. pearl wasn't allowed to touch, but she was allowed to help, and maybe they could arrive at something similar here, too.
"scar...?" impulse says, gentle and calm again. (it's only the smallest of wobbles that betrays him.) "do you think you could sit down? you don't have to let go of him, just, let us see? we don't have to come close." and then, after a breath, he tentatively pushes with another suggestion: "i think if you're calm about it, it might help him calm down too. you don't have to get away from him."
"yes he does!" tango protests.
impulse whips to face him. "tango!" he snaps back.
grian flinches in scar's arms at the raised tones, letting out another loud, terrified chirp, curling into scar for protection. he's back to sobbing louder, all of scar's comfort undone in one swift go.
--
SCAR
Scar’s wings sag the slightest bit, drawn in by the soft promises Impulse is laying out, but still hesitant to follow.
Sitting down would mean giving up an easy escape route. They could be lying. He could be cornered. This could all be a ploy to get him to lower his guard.
Tango’s outburst does not help settle that fear.
Scar grits his teeth together, a few stray tears falling as he struggles to form words. “Stop yelling,” he demands, light blue magic slipping past sharpened teeth.
He’s back to soothing Grian, not yet yielding and not at all regarding Mumbo’s request.
“Shh, shh, I’ve got you, okay? I’m—“ He looks over the three pairs of eyes— fearful, disdainful, concerned— and focuses in on Impulse. “They’re… friends.” (Not flock.) “I’m just gonna… kneel down here, okay?” (A small compromise.)
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
grian continues crying, albeit a little bit quieter again. just a notch. it's hard to tell if scar's soothing is working, or if he's just tiring himself out.
tango, to his credit, seems a bit alarmed by the reaction he's gotten. but he is still relentlessly wary, suspicious of this whole situation.
impulse can tell, and it keeps him tense. he wishes he could just tell tango and mumbo to leave, but he knows they wouldn't budge. not now. not when things are like this.
he holds back a sigh, looking grian's way. "yeah, we're friends," he echoes, soft, trying to sound harmless and encouraging.
he isn't even sure grian's listening to him. he isn't sure he can recognise his voice. it feels awful.
he doesn't think tango and mumbo realise the extent of what's happening. that if grian's mind is scrambled with the sickness, he might not be mentally present here. on hermitcraft. he might be stuck somewhere else entirely, and the thought of it pains impulse.
the least they can do is play along.
the least he can do is try to deescalate this whole thing.
"c'mon," he tugs at tango and mumbo, voice low. "let's sit down."
"wh— i don't want—" tango starts in protest, but impulse holds his gaze, steady.
"shh," he reminds him, shutting tango up.
"oh gosh," mumbo lets out, wobbly, and slowly lowers himself down to the floor.
impulse does the same, dragging tango down with him.
"see?" impulse looks back at scar, trying to offer a small smile. "we're not gonna go closer if you guys aren't ready. we're at the same level here. it's okay." he's willing to be patient here, but he worries that tango and mumbo might not be.
--
SCAR
Scar stares for a long moment, fidgeting between trust and opportunity, wondering if he could run. If he could take them down if they’re going to make themselves vulnerable like this.
His ears twitch with alarm at the mere thought, catching himself before he can spiral further into delusion.
Carefully, he lowers himself to the ground, knelt down on both knees so he could easily spring back into action.
“We aren’t ready,” Scar confirms, warily eyeing the lot of them.
His eyes are still bright blue, though slightly less fiery. His chest flickers occasionally, a warm white light. His wing lowers by only an inch.
He allows himself one moment of weakness, eyes flicking back down toward the shivering avian in his arms. “… I promise a warm bath after this, okay?” he whispers, though his voice carries, still too ragged from pressed together fangs. “W–we’re gonna be fine.”
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
impulse nods. he knows they aren't ready, but he hopes hearing that helps the others settle too. "we'll wait. take it slow. make sure he's okay," he coaxes, tone soft. hoping, desperately, that tango and mumbo won't mess this up. that they understand and will follow his lead. "we're not getting any closer. you have space." he pauses, and then he adds, a bit of heartache slipping into his voice: "you're safe, i promise."
grian recognises that they went down, slow and controlled. scar's hold is still tight and secure, and he's talking to him softly, and grian scrambles to understand what's happening. they're... not in danger anymore? scar says they're going to be fine.
with a tired coo, grian nuzzles into his shoulder. he trusts him, even as he still sniffles, tears dripping down.
his body feels awful, and his wings twitch, only to find themselves still tangled. it's that sensation that prompts another miserable sob from him, albeit less panic-driven. "take it off," he pleads, begging scar to untangle the trap that restricts him. "take it— scar, hurts," he whines.
the blanket doesn't actually hurt. his body aches from the fever and extertion, but his head tells him that pressure against his wings ought to be painful, and so that's what it is. the fear mistranslates into pain—or maybe just inevitability of the pain if this goes on, he isn't actually sure—the memories more vivid than reality itself.
--
SCAR
Scar nods slowly, wings lowering just a little bit more. He can see the tension actively begin to roll off of Mumbo, but for some reason that doesn’t comfort Scar in the slightest.
He tries to offer gratitude toward Impulse in some way, but then his attention is dragged back to Grian, ears flicking as he grows rigid and attentive once more.
“Take…?” Scar questions, looking Grian over in confusion before it finally clicks. “The— oh.”
He shifts a little, resting Grian’s weight firmly on his legs, and slowly peels away a few layers of blankets, trying to simply loosen them up and allow for his wings to slip free.
“It’s okay, you’re okay,” Scar assures him, voice already growing much softer, no more wisps escaping when he speaks. “There you go… ‘m sorry.”
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
it's the word hurts on grian's tongue that has mumbo jolting, and impulse has to react fast, grabbing him and keeping him still. "stay calm," he hisses under his breath, quiet enough to be intended only for their trio.
"do you really expect us just to sit here," tango hisses back, "when grian just said he's being hurt?"
impulse exhales, long and tense. "that's not what he said. and he asked scar to fix it. he said," he stresses, somehow still managing to keep his voice hushed and low, "he wants scar to stay near him. so sit. still. and wait."
grian, in the meanwhile, squirms as the blanket layers gets peeled off, feeling the pressure relent. he breathes out, a bit more steadily, forehead still firmly against scar. some of his crying tapers off once he can twitch his wings and feel no resistance—and the loosened blankets let his hands free, too. he uses this immediately to grab onto scar's shirt, depletedly holding on.
"thanks." he sniffles. and then he asks, feeling small and vulnerable, his heart still frightened: "are we safe...?"
--
SCAR
“Yes,” Scar replies, even if he doesn’t feel safe in the slightest. He feels under attack, though perhaps at least not physically. “…we’re having a sitting party.”
It’s a bit of a nonsensical thing to say, but Scar is trying desperately to reel himself in here. His eyes are only barely green, a blue sheen still hiding them away. He feels tense and uneasy, watching Tango in particular now with narrowed vision.
It flicks to Mumbo, accusatory in his stare. “I said we didn’t want visitors,” Scar states, guarded. “So why are you here?”
--
GRIAN
it is a bit nonsensical, the words sitting party taking a while to slot in grian's mind. but if they're having a party, that means there is someone else, right? the memories of the confusing, threatening voices feels fuzzy to grian. the danger has passed, the hunters are gone. they wouldn't be sitting down, wings released, having a party of all things otherwise—and scar confirmed they're safe.
which means...
maybe scar called them over, like grian asked?
he relaxes a little bit more, even as he still continues to wade his confusion. "flock...?" he asks in a tiny coo.
he's leaning his head on scar's shoulder, staring blankly off in the direction of scar's other shoulder, not focused on anything in particular. his vision still swims.
--
SCAR
“… Friends,” Scar corrects, because they’re not. “… They’re just—“ Scar swallows down some bitterness, trying to stay calm. “—worried about you.”
And then he looks back to Mumbo, eyes glowing a bit brighter again as he waits for his answer.
(They’re worried about Grian. Not him. Unless being worried of him counts.)
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
"mhn?" grian makes a confused sound at the word friends. it doesn't want to slot anywhere in his head. who?
mumbo, in the meanwhile, shrinks under scar's sharp attention. "we were worried," he offers, nothing more than a repeat of what scar's just said himself.
tango steps in, pointing out: "you said he was sick. we wanted to check in on him."
--
SCAR
Scar’s ears droop at Grian’s clear inability to recognize the concept. But frankly, he doesn’t blame him.
With a sigh, Scar scans the three of them again, looking them over for any sign of trouble, but he notes a distinct lack of anything, which makes him frown.
“So, what? Did you bring medicine?” he asks rhetorically, because he knows the answer. “Soup? Blankets? Bath salts?”
His eyes narrow with each question.
--
OTHERS
there's a very clear faltering across the whole group. they exchange glances, slightly nervous.
"i— we—" mumbo stammers, face flushing. he's suddenly feeling very uneasy. chastised. he stares at the bundle scar's holding, what he at first was so sure was a distressed avian probably really just a feverish one, and it makes him deflate. he didn't think past the anxiety enough to consider that scar might be telling the truth. (he's still not sure. he still needs to see grian, properly. he still wants to check.) (but the scales of probability are tipping in a way that makes him feel off balance and out of place.)
impulse sighs. he didn't have time to stop them long enough to ask them to be sensible and bring something for grian if he truly is sick. he is here as a chaperone and—oh boy is he glad he came. he can't imagine how this would've panned out otherwise.
"you weren't replying on the comms," tango soldiers through, still frowning, still a touch confrontational. he doesn't like the way scar's looking at him. doesn't like all his sharp edges. doesn't like the feeling that scar's still hiding something. "we didn't know what you need." he pulls slightly back, straightening up. "do you need anything?" he challenges. there already was a soup delivery by the front door, and it certainly doesn't seem like they're low on blankets.
--
SCAR
“I was a little preoccupied,” Scar replies dryly, frustrated that he’s still being questioned. “I’d think it’s customary to bring at least some sort of gift,” Scar continues to pry, not letting it go. Not letting it slide that they clearly came here out of fear instead of assistance. “But sure, sure, we certainly wouldn’t say no to some minty bath salts or some tea leaves.”
Scar briefly wonders if that’s all it would take to make this unwelcome trio leave. He doubts it.
“Or, you know, some peace and quiet so he can get some rest,” Scar concludes, tight jawed and eyebrows furrowed. At least his eyes are back to green.
--
OTHERS
mumbo recognises that they're being thrown out, but it just makes him dig his heels in. "we can bring some tea, but— but scar—"
it's tango who breaks this line drawn in the sand again, encroaching on a minefield territory. "we still haven't seen grian." because this sliver they can see right now doesn't count. it doesn't say anything about whether or not grian's hurt, underneath it all. even if grian begs for scar to be close. honestly, tango doesn't consider grian the best judge of that right now. unhealthy attachments exist!
--
SCAR
Scar exhales through his nose, slow and barely steady.
Reluctantly, he lowers his wing, allowing an unobstructed gaze, though he makes no effort to close the distance between them. He doesn’t want that line broken.
“…happy?”
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
grian registers scar's wing falling away, and it makes him feel oddly exposed. grian isn't sure to whom; scar said their flock isn't here, but that they're safe. still, he ducks, hiding his face in scar's chest. that way, he can pretend he's still shielded. that way, he can pretend the world can't hurt him. (the way he can feel scar's breaths is just a nice, soothing bonus. scar's right here, alive, right next to him. perfectly in reach, as grian's fingers tug at him.) (he closes his eyes, willing the surroundings to stop tipping around them. his feathers fluff up lightly.)
mumbo makes another strangled noise, and he moves as if to stand up, compelled to go closer. to check. to—
to be there.
grian's his friend, and there wasn't a time when mumbo wasn't allowed to be near. to take care of him when he feels unwell.
with blankets and grian's wings still firmly in the way, and grian's whole body turned away from them, mumbo still can't see anything. so no, he isn't happy.
"... grian?" he tries, calling out to him, coaxing him to look his way as he gets up to his wobbly feet.
--
SCAR
Scar bristles again, wings twitching as he instinctively growls, low and mercifully non-threatening, but it certainly doesn’t sound that way to an untrained ear.
These are untrained ears.
Scar registers the flinch in varying degrees from all three of them, and his ears twitch, then droop again in shame.
He can’t do this. He can’t let someone else close. It doesn’t matter how fidgety and awkward Mumbo is, Scar doesn’t trust him to come close.
Mumbo who says foolish things; Mumbo who looks at him like a stranger; Mumbo who cares so much that Scar can’t help but feel strangled by it as it weaves around him, passing him by and threatening to smother Grian in his disturbed state.
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
grian makes an inquisitive mewl, a soft and small sound, unworried at scar's growl. he knows it's not threatening, so he just gently prods, inquiring as to what's wrong. what's bothering scar?
pointedly, he doesn't react to mumbo's call at all. as if he didn't even register it.
tango's rising to his feet now, too, but impulse puts a hand on his shoulder.
it doesn't deter tango, and they both stand up. still far away, but in a way the three of them are now towering over kneeling scar, looking down with varying emotions.
"we'll get you some tea," impulse says, quiet, measured. he's looking directly at scar. he's trying to tell him that he sees him. that he doesn't blame him, no matter how stifling and explosive this situation is turning out to be.
"impulse!" tango squeaks, indignant, protesting. "he's hiding something!"
impulse's gaze cuts sharply to tango. "keep your voice down!" he hisses, frowning, then sighs. he understands they're anxious, but lines do need to be drawn.
for grian's sake as well as for scar's.
impulse looks back at scar, tries to soften all the jaggedness from his pooling tension. "do you think you can get him to sleep? rest a little?" he suggests. "we will come back with the tea. if grian's asleep— we can look at him then? so he won't be scared of us?" he bites at his lip, and then adds: "just look. and we can help if you'll need anything else from us, yeah?" it's a gentle proposal, an attempt to find a tightrope that won't send them all careening towards some awful abyss.
--
SCAR
Scar feels so horribly small knelt down like this in front of people that are seemingly hellbent on misinterpreting his every move. His wings fall to the ground at the insinuation of him hiding something once again.
He’s not. He’s hiding Grian maybe, but he was scared— he asked for help and this is how Scar would help…
Scar trembles under the spotlight of their gazes, even if Impulse’s is softer. He feels like he can’t move— like he isn’t allowed.
“I… I want him to rest,” Scar agrees weakly, nodding once in exhausted misery. “You… yeah. You can check on him then.”
He still hates it. Hates the idea of someone in their nest. Hates that he’s still being more or less monitored, hates that he can’t be trusted with what he knows best.
Scar looks down to Grian, eyes big, barely holding back the fear that seeps into that forest green. “Can I take you upstairs? …nest?”
--
GRIAN / OTHERS
impulse softens further at scar's agreement, hearing the fatigue and defeat in his voice. it makes his heart ache, even more when he thinks about everyone else overlooking that. "alright... thank you, scar," he says gently.
then his eyes flick to find the exit, realising they're going to have to walk past.
"can we... leave? or do you want us to wait until you go first?" impulse checks nervously, gaze jumping between scar and the avian he's cradling. he has a feeling scar doesn't want them here any longer than necessary, but impulse isn't sure if getting closer only for the sake of walking out is what he needs.
"or we can dirt pillar up," mumbo suggests with a nervous little laugh, attempting nonchalance and jokes, even as everything in him still rails against this. he's drawn forward, towards grian, like a moth to a flame. he wants to check him over, touch his skin, care for him. he doesn't realise he's completely disregarding scar in this scenario. doesn't realise he sees him as nothing but a mad guard dog, standing in his way for no reason.
"you're giving up?" tango huffs, tail swishing.
"i— what?" mumbo laughs again, more nervously this time. "we'll be back."
"what, so he can cover up his tracks?" tango pushes, frowning. all too aware that a potion or two are enough to hide most injuries. and an asleep grian can't answer any check-up questions.
it's impulse who growls now. "tango. scar isn't our enemy. he's our friend. maybe you should start treating him as such."
"i— wh— but—" tango stammers, completely taken off guard, ears pulling low.
grian, in the meanwhile, reacts to scar's careful, gentle question. his unfocused gaze lifts up, seeking to anchor in familiar green, feeling fragmented and vulnerable and still sick. "nest," he echoes, impossibly sad and hopeful, yearning. he sniffles, not paying their surroundings any attention; the memories still swirl through him, and nothing quite feels real.
nothing but scar.
he tips forward, wraps his arms around scar's shoulders in a weak hug, clinging to him in a position that makes it easy to carry him.
"... can the bucket come with us?" he half-jokes hoarsely.
--
SCAR
Turns out it doesn’t feel good being spoken about like he isn’t right there, and Scar finds himself slumping forward in defeat, misery seeping deep into his bones.
His chest flickers once more, eyes clouded with a blue fog that only fades when Grian wraps his arms around. Grian, who does trust him and is deserving of his love and attention.
Wretchedly, Scar swallows down his anxieties, does his best to ignore the unwelcome surroundings. He doesn’t even provide them an answer, instead leaning down to kiss Grian’s (still dreadfully warm) forehead.
“Anything you need, G,” he croaks, rising on incredibly wobbly feet and hooking the handle of the bucket with his pinky.
Wordlessly, he turns his back to his intruders and begins walking upstairs, unable to bear their presence any longer. His wings flick and tremble, uncomfortable being exposed to what he still inevitably seems as enemies.
(It’s only fair considering how he’s actively antagonized.)
“So sorry about all this moving around…” Scar continues murmuring, feeling entirely off balance, but managing to stay steady only because Grian is in his arms. “We’ll get nice and comfy, alright? And our guests can bring the soup in.”
That’s the only acknowledgment they get.
--
GRIAN
grian lets out a soft noise at the kiss, a mix of comforted and still absolutely miserable. he isn't sure if he feels hot or cold, and his body aches. the nausea is ever-present, making any move a wretched matter, especially when coupled with his still spinning head.
he tries to hold onto scar a bit firmer, but his strength isn't there. he groans, whimpering. "slow," he pleads, not knowing how else to mitigate this.
he really doesn't want to puke if he can help it. although maybe having it over would feel better than this.
--
SCAR
“Slow,” Scar parrots, purposely stilling himself for a moment before continuing at a steadier pace. He didn’t realize he was rushing, honestly, but it makes sense.
He wants those eyes off of his back.
He thinks he hears the sound of pillaring blocks, and that’s likely for the best.
“Nice and slow,” he confirms again, trying to keep Grian level once they’re past the steps.
--
aaaand i’ll wrap it up with that. :3
#ange answers#ribbon anon#cw abuse#although it's just an allegation that's incorrect#tagging just to be safe for the mention#you can bug link if u want to dig deeper into scar's feelings in this whole mess <3#i was like: ok grian gets sick and delusional hehe!!#and link hit me so hard with scar angst#sOBS#(love it)#as for grian's fever#it was born from all the stress#we talked about how after they got back to hc scar had a couple of really bad flare ups#as if his body knew it was now safe to finally break down#grian is the same in that regard#he gets sick from stress. now that he safely can y'know#this whole thing would've been so so so much worse if impulse wasn't there#grian and scar were so apprehensive about trying to rebuild the bunker into something else. about the hermits coming over.#but they wanted to try their best#before the sickness hit grian was expressing his anxiety on being a good partner because he has no experience#and the hermits sort of made it sound like he doesn't know what love or relationships should be like#so he wanted scar to tell him about his experiences#oh also i hope u enjoyed the random discord screenshots pfff
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beidou tucking ningguang into bed when shes sick pls plsplsplslps 😭
#i wanted this to be fluff#and maybe you wanted it too anon#but my dumbass tendencies were kicking in while drawing this#so yea#hope you like it???#baishi actually had to call beidou since ningguang collapsed while dressing her for work#and ningguang didn't listen to her secretaries#insisting that she's fine#and there's so much work to do#thank goodness beidou's crew didn't weigh the anchors yet#beiguang#beidou#ningguang#doodle#ask#alyss answers#genshin impact#anonymous#anon#scheduled post
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