#I hope these are ok I’m very tired
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
outofangband · 10 months ago
Text
I really loved @gwaedhannen ‘s post about wanting more strangeness in First Age Beleriand and I had a post awhile back about potential strange ecology for Middle Earth so I wanted to revisit it with some more thoughts!
Following up to my speculative biology ideas for elves,
Like the last list, these are more jotting down ideas, please please feel free to give me any to elaborate on!
Mammoths on the Helcaraxë and other cold reaches. Tolkien talks of all creatures that walk or have ever walked the earth existing in Valinor and throughout Arda hence prehistoric and extinct species can also exist here. I do also headcanon smaller herds of woolly mammoths and woolly rhinos in northern Hithlum and north of greater Beleriand. Stellar’s sea cows in the frozen waters:(
Early cenozoic aquatic birds such as Hesperornis off the coasts of Balar and Alqualondë.
 Enchanted orchards of Valinor; large, seemingly abandoned self containing gardens and orchards. There are fruit tree orchards hidden behind ivy covered walls; some always filled with Autumn breezes, citrus groves always kept warm and bright lined with lemon trees and deep green grass. Except for the Maia who tend them, the only beings who enter the orchards are elves who do so, usually by mistake.
There are places throughout Arda where the Music was not well, loud, enough. They can be the size of a footstep or a field and are not fully connected to the space time continuum. Those who tread on them will end up elsewhere in time or space and will never realize what had happened.
In the great expanses of unexplored Valinor, there are coves, glens, lagoons, and all sorts of other places that seem shift and change, being there one day and not the next. Even while walking through familiar, charted territory, there is always the possibility of ending up in a hidden clearing, covered in hanging mosses and with strange lights all around.
The forests of Beleriand are full of strange, sometimes dark creatures that have never been properly documented. They are the strange hybrids of Yavanna’s creations and Melkor’s corruption and a few have escaped the eyes of even the Ainur. 
The underground lakes of Middle Earth, especially around Angband contain blind, hungry beings, nourished by the volcanic soils. Strange fungi and lichen stick to the walls of the caverns and passageways beneath the fortress.
There are hot springs in several locations in Beleriand South of the Ered Wethrin (there are many in the Ered Wethrin of course but these are not exactly relaxation destinations). Namely in Himring, throughout Hithlum, north of Barad Eithel, parts of Dorthonion, in the caves of Androth, and parts of the Ered Luin. Not all of these are used by residents and not all maintain safe temperatures or conditions but some do! In many parts of Northern Beleriand, they're used for bathing and communal relaxation. There are other springs throughout the March of Maedhros and I like the idea of Himring being built around a hot spring. There are hot and warm springs in both Nargothrond and Menengroth. The definition of warm springs differs from hot springs only in average temperature
The caves of Menengroth and Nargothrond allow elves and others access to the strange wonders of the underground world of Middle Earth.  They are lit by lanterns and by certain bioluminescent plants. There are windows in key areas that allow sunlight to filter into some of the larger halls and though there are small gardens of species that do not require direct sunlight, some are stationed in the areas where sunlight filters in. A small tributary of the river Narog flows directly through one of the great halls of Nargothrond. Its flora and fauna remain untouched by the elves and algae and aquatic plants as well as small fish, salamanders in their early stages, and stranger creatures are visible to see for those who walk along it. 
In realms with Ainur or certain Eldar rule, natural life may not follow typical laws. Melian has great influence over the biodiversity and climate of Doriath for example even without meaning to.
The horror potential of the boundaries of the girdle or of Nan Elmoth. Time and space distorting, the forest becoming a maze, bird calls confusing and disorienting unwary or unlucky travelers
The Ered Gorgoroth, the eerie, mysterious mountain range, bordered to the north by Dorthonion and to the south by Nan Dungortheb. It was said the spawn of Ungolian haunted these mountains and the valley. I have some more posts on this but I've always imagined there being many pools and meres in Ered Gorgoroth, many harmless though frigid and some completely corrupted by the powers of Ungoliants spawn and other beings. Unfortunately, it’s not always possible to know which was which until it was too late.
Chemical reactions causing glimmering or colorful water. Elves learn carefully when this has occurred due to natural phenomena and when it is the result of unnatural influence or Ainur presence.
Salt lakes and landlocked waters mimicking ocean conditions. I’ve always imagined there being a lake like lake Baikal in the March of Maedhros
More Bioluminescence
The realms draped in dragon reek especially around Nargothrond. The pools of Ivrin are ruined by Glaurung and they are the source of the river Narog, the largest tributary to Sirion. The entire land could be poisoned. I imagine that plants wither or lose color, birds and frogs stay silent, animals are thrown off of their natural cycles, The orchards in the hills barren or producing foul fruit, strange happenings resulting from drinking from the river Narog or even eating animals that drank from it…
Alternatively the effects of the water where the power of Ulmo is still strong such as in Nan Tathren or the Twilit Meres
95 notes · View notes
goldensunset · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
joining the war on autism on the side of the autism etc etc
337 notes · View notes
calamitydaze · 7 months ago
Text
long tag ramble below u have been warned
Tumblr media
#ok i feel like i should say Something before i start being active again#but i dont want it to be a Statement which is why i’m putting it in the tags#(also bc i procrastinated doing this for weeks so i know this is a very stale topic by now#but i also haven’t been on tumblr literally at all so this is 100% my organic authentic opinion lmao)#so read if you gaf and ignore if you don’t#anyway: george def could’ve done more to ensure she was comfortable#and as someone who has also gotten in over my head with older men and regretted it#her hurt is valid and i’m deeply sorry she feels the way she does about that night#but with that said i see no reason to believe george Should have known how she really felt#or that he deliberately took advantage of either her youth/inexperience or her discomfort#and that’s the most important thing for me— he fucked up and misread a situation but that doesn’t make him an evil person#and i hope they can both move on and grow and heal#as for my future in the fandom: i honestly dunno how active i’ll be going forward#i was already becoming pretty disconnected so this might’ve just sped up the process? i’m tired of being put through the wringer#but i also don’t really have a fandom to replace this so i might just continue casually participating in the way i have been#either way rest assured i will never become a rabid anti. that shits embarrassing#i got HORRIBLE drolo rsd the other day when tommy’s mom needed clout and vagued him so like if nothing else. droloisms are forever#also as a last thing— this feels kinda silly and self centered to say but i will anyway#sorry for not opening up my blog as a forum for discussion again the way i did with the drituation#i know i helped a lot of people sort out their feelings and that was (and is) really really important to me#but it also tanked my mental health (mostly as a result of the fallout and not the act itself but still)#plus my life irl was pretty stressful at the time when everything was first going down#so i just didn’t feel up to putting myself through that again#but i’m sorry if anyone wanted to discuss w me but wasn’t able to#anyway. i think that’s all i have to say!#i don’t want to turn this into a capital D discussion but as always my askbox and dms are open#love you all tons! i hope you’re having a good day 🫂🫶#bella talks
6 notes · View notes
a-very-fond-farewell · 6 months ago
Text
:/
3 notes · View notes
binders-and-beanies · 7 months ago
Text
.
#cops tw#bro I cannot handle one more thing happening istg#got pulled over on my way home after a 13 hour day#was already scared to drive at night and that just confirmed that I’m right to be scared#it was for running a red light n it was one of those situations of just not having time to stop on yellow#I was fully aware as it was happening that I was either going to slam on my brakes in the intersection or run a red and I could see the cop#so I knew I was getting pulled over either way I just hoped the yellow would be longer than .5 seconds. not so lucky#except I also Am so lucky bc he let me off with a warning#ig bc I don’t have any sort of serious history + with it being 420 once he saw I was sober he prob went easier#it’s the second time I’ve been pulled over in my life tho and it’s scary bc this is the first time since the accident#which maybe that was also ok bc it wasn’t my fault#I just know every warning or unlucky moment costs u more in the future if u happen to get unlucky again#like I know I got out of that bc I’m white. it was still a scary moment bc there were multiple cop cars#so it’s like is this guy abt to ruin my life am I gonna lose my license for being at the wrong place wrong time#when I’m already salty to be driving this late involuntarily#so it’s like I got unlucky And very very lucky#I just hate the confirmation that u can get pulled over at any given moment#I constantly rehearse every possible convo w cops in my head bc if u come off disabled u can die#or get arrested or whatever#and then they like don’t follow the script and u didn’t expect this to happen to u today anyway and I get flustered#anyway my point is. I’m fucking exhausted and too many things keep happening#it’s long day after long day w no end in sight rn and I’m like half asleep every day#I just want to sleep. without feeling like I’m already tired tomorrow#it’s too much. just all of it#and on top of it all. it’s 420 so the whole dorm building is basically a cloud of weed#happy u guys are having fun but u are physically harming me in my home#mine#txt#vent post#personal
3 notes · View notes
logicalparafox · 10 months ago
Text
Well at least my instinct that I wouldn’t get an early night was spot on. On the other hand I do not remember what to do when someone is falling down drunk.
Sigh, the things I do for family.
List for future me under the cut although hopefully this will never happen again:
Hair ties (remembered this time, clutch)
Gloves (my trunk was out and I had Many Regrets)
Paper towels (did have, so glad)
Plastic bag (did think to grab one)
Plastic stretchy garbage bag (less risk of leaking)
Baby wipes
Gatorade
Water
Saltines
Vinegar and water spray bottle to get the yuck off the sidewalk
Headlamp maybe, illumination helpful and hands full
Anyway I’m going to bed once I feel less unclean.
5 notes · View notes
capetowncapers · 11 months ago
Text
I haven’t gotten my Covid booster yet this year bc I’m the worst and I just made an appointment for tomorrow…. When the next several days are going to be fairly busy…. Let’s hope it doesn’t knock me on my ass lmao
3 notes · View notes
autism-disco · 1 year ago
Text
in my defernce i woke up at 3 after falling asleep i don’t know when and i needed to get changed so actually this is FINE but i might as well do some work while i’m awake. that is if i needed defending anyway
3 notes · View notes
therosevest · 2 years ago
Text
should i unfollow/block her. i think probably
5 notes · View notes
merriclo · 2 years ago
Text
ahsjkds rant/vent in the tags
#i fucking LOVE having to hug my friend as they sob bc our rights r actively being revoked#i’m literally 16 years old. i don’t even have my permit yet.#it shouldn’t be up to us kids. i shouldn’t have to tell them that we’ll fix it and make it all ok one day#it’s not that fucking hard to let trans people exist. it’s really not.#and yet#i just. ughajdnfjkw#they were sobbing. and all i could do was promise that i’d try and fix it.#i’m pissed and tired and upset and all i can do about it is hope that my emails and club speeches actually do something while i wait#there are wonderful adults who are fighting for us and i cherish them greatly#but that doesnt change the fact that the government - the very people i was raised to believe we’re there to protect me - is actively#passing laws in favor of my suicide.#and the only thing i can do about it in the meantime is comfort my friends and hope they give my email the light of day#it’ll be okay. we can fix this and save our community. i know we can.#i just wish this wasn’t something we have to do in the first place#this is gonna sound indelicate but i wish i still flinched when getting called a faggot#i’m not sure if this makes sense but it feels like i lost something when i started teaching myself to remain neutral in the face of bigotry#i want to be mad and upset but instead i’m carefully crafting how im perceived and judged at every moment#where’s the justice in me forcing myself to watch bigoted videos at the age of 14 so i wouldn’t be caught off guard or shocked when harassed#tell me where the fuck the justice is in that.#sorry for all this rambling i’m just upset
2 notes · View notes
chalkrevelations · 2 years ago
Text
.
3 notes · View notes
neixins · 1 year ago
Text
girl…….. everyone’s mad at ME about these stupid orders not being shipped correctly and the delivery guy told me the lady i called on monday to see if i had to send any paperwork is claiming i never called her or sent the paperwork when i DID call her and she told me i don’t have to send anything like BITCH ARE U FOR REAL RN??? fucking unbelievable!
1 note · View note
wheeboo · 1 year ago
Text
my jun fic is queued to post some time idk like 15 mins after this msg ^-^ looking back tbh it might have been more clever to post it on friday the 13th but uh oh well 😔
1 note · View note
figmentforms · 2 months ago
Text
Sorry for the slow comic updates. I’m hoping to get the next one done in about two weeks! I’ve been very busy with preparing for baby. Super excited and so happy that things are going mostly ok health-wise for this kid! I just have so much to get ready and so much to learn (taking classes on how to take care of baby correctly and building a suitable/safe baby habitat in my home) . Also turns out making a baby in your body makes you tired as heck and completely obsessed with food. Also I miss being able to feel my feet, but it’s worth it. Fascinating times!
1K notes · View notes
n0thingbutlov3 · 4 months ago
Text
need you now
in which an impulsive voicemail leads to some secrets being spilled.
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader. warnings/tags: angst (sorry i’m incapable of being nice lol) hurt/comfort tho!! lil bit of fluff too because i AM capable of being nice, alcohol consumption as a coping mechanism (i’m literally just a girl…) spencer and reader are broken up :( but they’re still sooo in love and it’s soo obvious so it’s fine!! (also it kind of gets fixed at the end-ish. you’ll see *evil smirk*) reader cries a lot (real) spencer is a cutie (as always) spencer and reader sleep together…no like literally, not in a funny business way, some swearing, no use of y/n!!! wc: 3k a/n: hihihi!! so this is my first fan fiction i’ve wrote and completed ever (gulp) it’s also my first time publishing one (gulp) my writing could definitely be better and so could my grammar tbh but i HOPE if you choose to read you’ll enjoy…feedback is always appreciated (plsplspls) also like requests?? if anyone’s into that—id love to write more but inspo is difficult sometimes. if there’s any spelling mistakes im sorry, eye am very tired!! it’s 5am *eye twitching* okay i’m going to sleep, gootbye IF U SAW ME EDITING THIS 5 TIMES NO U DIDNT (i’m bad at tumblr ok..)
“Hi. This is Doctor Spencer Reid. I’m not available right now, but leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can…”
His tinny voice cut off to make way for the signature beep of the beginning of a voicemail recording.
You could hang up now—you should hang up now, save yourself some dignity and go drown your sorrows in alcohol like a normal person instead of calling your ex-boyfriend.
You should, but your mouth was opening before your finger could reach the hang-up button, and…and it was a losing battle from the moment you clicked on Spencer’s icon.
“Uh—hi, it’s…it’s me.” You huffed out a sad laugh.
“So, um, I…I tried calling, but you didn’t answer so…” The static buzz of silence hummed through your ear, just inches from where you held your phone with a shaky grip. “maybe you’re on a case or out with friends, or someone else—“ You let the implication hang in the air—the thought of Spencer potentially being in a relationship bringing a lump to your throat.
You swallowed it down.
“I just…I just had an unbelievably shitty day, Spence.” You sniffed, wiping the moisture that had escaped from your eye with your sweater sleeve. “I know you’ve never read A Series of Unfortunate Events but I think I’d give those kids a run for their money.” You tried to laugh but it came out as more of a sob.
You inhaled shakily, trying to collect yourself and remember why on earth you thought it would be a good idea to call Spencer when you’d been broken up for months. Hell, you hadn’t heard from him at all since you had parted ways—except from the odd text about returning each others’ things. It was obvious he had moved on, and here you were, filling up his voicemail with blubbering messages and making references to adolescent books.
“God, sorry about this.” You breathed out a watery chuckle. “I just…didn’t want to be alone, I guess. But that’s-um-not your problem anymore, so I’m—I’m sorry. Have a nice night.” Your voice cracked and you hung up before you could start weeping down the line. You didn’t need to look even more pathetic.
You pulled your phone away from your ear, looking down at his contact photo through blurred vision. He was smiling—not the tight, closed lip smile he gave other people, but a full, bright smile that had his dimples showing. One of your hands was wrapped loosely around his neck and the other was holding your phone just far enough away to capture both of your smiles. Your head was rested on top of his shoulder, tilted just slightly to the left so your temple was brushing against his.
It felt like looking at a vintage photograph—you knew those people and their happiness existed at some point in time, but it wasn’t tangible; you couldn’t verify it was real.
When you were with Spencer, you never doubted how real it was. All you had to was look at him across the room and he’d flash you a smile identical to the one in that photo and you’d just…know.
It felt like forever ago now that you’d been on the receiving end of that grin and it killed you. So much so that before you could consider the repercussions, you were trudging through to your kitchen and grabbing the bottle of whiskey that sat unopened in your cabinet. It had been a present—from Rossi, actually. When Spencer had first introduced you to the team, the older man had given it to you as something of a welcome gift. Of course, he couldn’t have known you weren’t much of a drinker, and since you wanted to make a good impression (and because you were sure it had cost more than all the alcohol you had consumed in your life combined) you accepted it—deciding to save it for a rainy day.
You think this qualified.
You grabbed the bottle, a glass, and padded back through to your living room, slumping onto your couch. You filled your glass up a little less than halfway before gulping it down, enjoying the burn in your throat—it was better than the constant thickness.
You poured yourself another glass before turning on the TV. You weren’t sure what was playing—it didn’t really matter anyway, your vision was already being obscured by tears again.
You thought the pounding was in your head at first—serves you right for drinking half a bottle of whiskey. Only, it wasn’t, because moments later the pounding subsided and instead, your apartment door was opening, casting your pitch-black living room in a yellow glow which temporarily blinded you.
You squeezed your eyes shut, your mind hazy—again, serves you right for drinking half a bottle of whiskey. Someone was calling your name, but there was too much sensory input for you to make out who.
You certainly hoped it wasn’t a paramedic—maybe your neighbour had heard you sobbing for the last four hours and decided you needed a wellness check. Then there were hands on your face, and that had you flicking your eyes open, because you recognised those hands—impossibly soft, with a callus on his trigger finger being the only thing to mar them. Spencer.
“Spencer?” You slurred.
He sighed in exasperation (or relief) and tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear.
“Are you alright? You weren’t answering your phone, I thought…” He trailed off, worry evident in his voice.
You sat up then, trying to compose yourself even though the room was spinning. Fucking whiskey. You rubbed your eyes haphazardly, blinking until you could finally see.
You should’ve stayed bleary-eyed. Because nothing could prepare you for the way your breath hitched when you finally saw him. After months of not seeing each other, Spencer was here, sitting on your couch, and he was looking at you like you were something fragile, and—God, you needed another drink. You turned away from him, reaching for the neck of the bottle as you spoke.
“I’m fine.”
Before you could lift it up, Spencer gently pried your hand away from the bottle with his own, and then slid it across the coffee table with his other.
“You’re drunk. No more of that, please.” His tone wasn’t unkind, but he left no room to argue. You probably would’ve objected anyway, if it weren’t for the way he kept his hand clasped around yours, rubbing soothing circles into your pulse point almost absentmindedly.
You glanced up to him—to stop yourself from staring at your hand in his and how natural it felt, more than anything—but that proved to be a mistake too, because he looked just as beautiful as thirty seconds prior and it felt just as natural for him to be sitting next to you on your sofa, but it wasn’t natural anymore.
“How did you get in?”
“My key.”
“Oh.”
Right. The key that he still had because you refused to meet up with him to let him return it. He tried for weeks to contact you, but you ignored him, because getting the key back meant things were finally over. You supposed he could return it now—maybe that’s why he came in the first place.
“Why did you come?” You asked, your voice impossibly small.
“You called.” He replied—as though he was talking about something as simple as the weather. You call and I come.
You searched in his eyes for any sign of a lie, but of course, there was none. He was being completely genuine—as always. You were the awful ex-girlfriend who left concerning voicemails on his phone and had him travelling to your apartment in the middle of the night only for him to look completely okay with the situation—like there was nothing he’d rather be doing than making sure you were safe.
You couldn’t help the way tears sprung to your eyes or your lip began to tremble as you lolled your head back onto the couch, pulling your gaze away from his.
“Angel, what’s wrong?”
You liked to consider yourself to be a strong person. You had been through things in your life that were objectively worse than your breakup with Spencer, but something about the gentleness of his tone and the way he had let one of his many (past) petnames for you slip had your throat tightening and you ducked your head into your one hand—the other still seized by Spencer’s—to try and muffle a sob.
“Hey,” He trailed his hand that was wrapped around yours up your arm, all the way to your shoulder blade before lightly guiding you towards him. You don’t have enough energy in you to fight his magnetic pull, so you shuffle over until you can bury your head into his shirt. You inhale his scent; vanilla, neroli, and so him it makes you ache.
Stopping your tears is futile—you’d know, they’d barely ceased all night—so you just let them fall, seeping into Spencer’s tie as he rubs one hand softly up and down your back, the other cradling the crown of your head.
His breathing is quiet and slow—the exact opposite of yours—and you try to imitate it—forcing air into your lungs. When your sobbing has turned to shaky breathing and the occasional sniffle, he speaks up.
“Do you want to talk?”
Talk about what? About what had happened today—what had led you to calling him? Talk about how for the last few months, he had been the only person you had wanted to call?
“No.” You hated how pitiful you sounded.
“Okay.”
Spencer didn’t say anything else for a minute—your synchronised breathing being the only thing to stop the room from falling into dead silence.
“You need to rehydrate.” He murmured, smoothing down your hair.
You hummed into him, in no hurry to unwrap yourself from his body. You probably wouldn’t get to be this close to him again, after all.
He moved both of his hands to your biceps, pulling you back slightly so you could look at him. He knitted his brows together in a silent plea which had you rolling your eyes petulantly, your lashes still damp from tears.
“Fine.” You peeled yourself off of him, pushing yourself into a standing position. Horrible mistake. You were still incredibly drunk, turns out, and everything was spinning a little bit and come to think of it, you were also nauseous and—
“Careful, lovely.” Spencer placed his hand firmly on the small of your back, keeping you upright.
and—actually, you were fine now.
He stood too, moving his hand just slightly over to your waist so he could guide you to the kitchen. When he knew you could stand upright—even if you were relying mostly on the counter behind you—he grabbed a glass from your cabinet, moving around effortlessly to pour you some water. The sight was so domestic you almost wanted to cry again. Maybe in some alternate timeline, where you and him could’ve worked, this would be an every day thing—minus the drunk sobbing part, of course.
He handed you the glass of water, watching as you took a few sips. He raised an eyebrow, nodding his head slowly.
“Whole thing, please.”
You let out an exasperated (affectionate) sigh and gulped the rest of it down, setting it on the counter behind you.
“Happy?”
“Very.”
You smirked, trailing your gaze down his body. He was still in his work clothes which, at the very least, meant he wasn’t on a date before he came here. He always changed before dates—well, for you, anyway. You wondered if he had been on any dates since the breakup—you certainly hadn’t. It had been long enough now that it wouldn’t be weird for you to start seeing other people—but you didn’t want to. You weren’t sure you’d ever want to, to be completely honest.
The more you thought about it, the more the whole thing seemed stupid. You didn’t want anyone else, you wanted Spencer. You had tried to get over him but if tonight was any indication—it clearly wasn’t working. You can’t even remember why you broke up in the first place—it all seemed so insignificant now. No amount of pain you had ever experienced in your relationship had come close to that of living without him.
You met his eyes once more and it was like he could see the question brewing. He tried to stop you, calling your name in a quiet warning, but you ignored him.
“Why did we break up?”
He frowned, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth with his tongue in that maddening way he did.
“I—you know why—“
“No, but I don’t! I know things were difficult sometimes but that doesn’t mean it didn’t work. It worked—we worked.” Your eyes were stinging again.
Spencer pressed his index and middle finger into his eye, furrowing his brows.
“I know, I know we worked, angel—but you were sad all the time, remember? I was gone so often and it wasn’t good for you.” His true emotions were indecipherable but his tone was soft, and you wished you could be as calm about this as him. Did he just not care as much as you did?
“But It’s—It’s worse now—“ You choked out, tears falling freely now. “I was sad when you were gone, but you always came back—you don’t come back anymore.”
Spencer removed his hand from his face, flexing it at his side like he was uncertain what to do with himself before taking a stride towards you. He brought a hand to your face, wiping the tears from under your eyes delicately—like you were made of porcelain.
“Listen, sweetheart—alcohol affects your ability to regulate your emotions and I know right now it might feel worse but that doesn’t mean it always—“
“Spencer, stop! It’s not the fucking alcohol, I miss you! I miss you all of the time! Even—even when I’m having a good day—I still want you—and especially when I—when I have a bad day—“ You choked out through heaving breaths.
“Breathe.” He urges, cupping your cheek. And you’re so, so angry, and sad, and tired that you have no choice but to shut up and listen to him. When you’ve adequately calmed down, he moves his hand to your jaw, tilting your head up to look at him.
“I don’t think we should talk about this tonight but I—“ You open your mouth to protest.
“I promise we can talk about it tomorrow when you’re sober—if you still want to.”
Your lip trembles of its own volition and you frown.
“Of course I want to.”
“Okay,”
“Okay.”
He gives your eyes a final wipe before he’s—rather unexpectedly—pulling you into a hug. You all but melt into him, your head finding its home in his sternum and your arms wrapping around his middle. He tilts his head down, kissing the top of your head—and you’re certain you can’t let this go again. You will chain him down before Spencer leaves this apartment again.
Everything is wordless from there—mostly because you’re so, so exhausted that even talking seems like too difficult a task. Spencer helps you find something more comfortable to change into and you pull out an old t-shirt of his and a pair of plaid pyjama pants you had kept here for him. I guess your keeping them ‘just in case you needed them in the future’ had come in handy, after all.
As you washed your face, Spencer snuck through to the kitchen, refilling your water and grabbing two aspirin in a not-so-subtle attempt to help the inevitable hangover you were going to have in the morning.
You caught him placing them on your bedside table and mock gasped.
“Trying to drug me in my sleep so you can make a run for it in the night?”
He grinned lazily—exhaustion creeping up on him as well.
“I wouldn’t dream of it.”
You smiled, flopping yourself onto your bed rather ungraciously. Spencer looked at you like you were something fascinating before biting his lip, clearly deep in thought.
“What?” You let out a self-effacing little chuckle.
“I was just…wondering…if you’d like me to sleep on the couch?”
You probably should’ve been more careful in your facial expressions considering you were still broken up but your thoughts about that offer were obvious.
“No, stay.” Stay in your bed, in your apartment—stay anywhere that was close to you.
Maybe you were coming on a little too strong.
“Unless you want to, I mean—“
“No, no—I’ll stay.” Forever, preferably.
He walked around to the other side of your bed—as he had done so many times before—and sat down, pulling the covers over his legs. You mirrored his movements before flicking your bedside lamp out, turning to face him.
You were a little thankful you were so out of it, because this had the potential to be very awkward otherwise. Spencer shuffled down so that he was at eye level with you, turning to face you as well.
You just stared for a moment, committing him to memory. The moonlight had a way of highlighting all the high points of his face, and the twinkle in his eyes, and—God, you were so glad the moon existed and that Spencer was in your bed that you couldn’t help but giggle.
“What?” Spencer laughed along with you, even though he had no idea what was so funny.
“Nothing. You’re pretty.”
“You’re drunk. Go to sleep.”
“Don’t wanna.”
“Why?”
“Scared you’ll be gone when I wake up—like I made it all up.”
Spencer’s smile faded then, and he looked at you with something that seemed so much like the one thing you had been willing yourself to stop doing the whole time that you’d been broken up, that it almost took your breath away.
“I won’t. I promised, didn’t I?”
You nodded.
“So there’s nothing to worry about. Now get some sleep, lovely.”
You smiled, feeling Spencer’s hand inching towards yours. He intertwined them and gave yours a squeeze.
“Just in case you make a run for it in the night.”
You chuckled, your eyelids fluttering shut. Yeah, you could make it work.
part two!
2K notes · View notes
jobean12-blog · 5 months ago
Text
The Fine Print
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female reader (CEO!Bucky AU)
Word Count: 4,126
Summary: You've been working under Bucky for almost a year and he's always been a grumpy ass and even though when the lines get blurred you can't seem to stay away.
Author's Note: These new pics and all the new gym shots and vids and yum! Just being fed so well! I like the idea of a grumpy CEO who just wants you and he's mad about it. No excuse for being a dick but he's not really all bad. And anyway, I'd never tell him no...haha! Thank you all so much for reading! Much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Thank you Daisy for the lovely divider @firefly-graphics😘
Warnings: Grumpy ass Bucky (he's a total ass sometimes but has moments of softness), sassy reader, lots of tension, flirting, curses, fingering, light dirty talk
Tumblr media Tumblr media
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
You’re late. Only twenty minutes but it’s long enough that your grumpy ass of a boss will have your head for it.
Grumpy…and an ass but entirely too gorgeous.
You pick up the pace, precariously balancing your files and bags and hoping you don’t faceplant on the newly shined floors.
Getting a flat tire on the highway this morning wasn’t on your long to-do list for today, but it still happened and now you’ll have to deal with a very cranky Mr. Barnes.
You round the corner and enter your office, ready to give your usual sunshine filled greeting.
“Good morning, Mr. Barnes!”
He’s standing at your desk, arms crossed over his broad chest and his eyes hard.
“Is it a good morning?” he asks, not bothering to move out of the way as you try to slip around him. “What time is it?”
You stop and meet his glare.
“I had some car trouble this morning. I got a flat on my way in.”
Your voice comes out steady and strong and relief floods through you. This was the first time you were late, and you were not going to be reprimanded.
“Trouble is quite the fitting word for what I’ve been dealing with in your absence.”
You glance up at him and his antagonizing stare, and blink away your surprise at his words.
“I would have thought you would at least ask me if I was ok Mr. Barnes,” you say sweetly and with a smile. “After all, how could I possibly manage to fix a flat tire all on my own.”  
His jaw clenches tightly.
“Obviously you managed,” he counters. “And you look just fine.”
Beautiful blue eyes wander languidly down your body before making their slow perusal back up to study your face.
You try to school your features and when he raises an expectant brow you bite back with, “Thankfully I am fine, and I got help but I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with the burden of picking up a telephone and sending an e-mail all on your own this morning. It won’t happen again.”
He takes a step closer to you and you stop yourself from swaying forward to get a hint of his scent.
Traitorous body. If only the fucker wasn’t so fucking hot.
“You’re right. It won’t,” he replies with a smug smile. “And just so you don’t forget, I’d like to see…”
He spends the next minute rattling off several project pieces he’d like to see completed and on his desk by the end of the day.
“And then you can make up the half an hour you missed by getting together a mock presentation for our meeting tomorrow.”
When your nostrils flare, he smiles triumphantly and dips his head, so his warm breath caresses the shell of your ear.
“I’ll see you in the conference room at six.”
He turns away and slams his office door behind him and you let out an exasperated puff of air.
“It was only twenty minutes asshole.”
You mutter the words under your breath as you plop into your office chair and continue to curse his name in grumbles.
Tumblr media
There’s a light knock on the door before it opens and you know you’re about to hear the voice of your friend and coworker, Jess.
“I know you’re working through lunch,” she says. “So at least let me get you something.”
You don’t look up but smile nonetheless, your fingers flying over the keyboard with ease.
“Honestly, I don’t even think I have time to eat,” you say before hitting the period button hard and meeting her eyes.
Jess gives you a sympathetic look. “I’ll grab you something nutritious.”
She waves before gently shutting the door. You lean over to check your desk drawer for snacks, the mention of lunch reminding you that you are in fact, hungry. At the same time that you see you have nothing to eat you notice a tear in your stockings.
“Son of a bitch,” you grumble. “I just bought these.”
Less than a minute later your door opens again and without looking up from your screen you whine, “do you know what, after the morning I’ve had I think I’ll take something sweet…maybe a cookie. Or twelve. Or chocolate of any kind.”
When you receive no acknowledgement, in return you glance up and see that Jess is not standing at your door.
You quickly tug the hem of your skirt down, noting how Bucky’s eyes track the movement and linger on your legs.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Barnes, I didn’t realize…”
“Since your morning has been so awful,” he starts, his sly smile growing, “why don’t you run down to the café and pick us both up some lunch.”
Your lips purse and once again his eyes seem glued to every action you take.
“Mr. Barnes, Jess has just come in and said she would grab me something to eat so I can continue working through lunch.”
When he doesn’t say anything, you continue.
“I have A LOT to get done.”
“I’m sure you’ll make it work,” he says before rattling off his lunch order.
He turns on his heel and takes two long strides back to his office, pulling the door closed hard behind him.
“What the f…?”
You don’t even finish the sentence when he opens the door again and pokes his head out.
“Make sure you get yourself something to eat. We’re going to be here late.”
The door slams shut again, and you abruptly stand, your rolling chair flying back into the wall as you storm off.
“Why does he care if I eat or not?” you ask yourself as you angrily stuff things into your bag and throw it over your shoulder.
Tumblr media
The rest of the day goes by far too quickly and you find yourself cursing out the copy machine as you wait for the rest of your papers to go through. Checking your phone you see you’re already almost ten minutes late to your afterhours ‘meeting.’
You rush down the dim hall of the now empty building, your presentation materials clutched tightly to your chest and glance again at your phone.
Fifteen minutes. Shit.
As you near the conference room, you try to calm your breathing and slow to a walk. A soft light shines from under the door, and you know he’s in there waiting for you.
Taking a deep breath you knock.
“Come in.”
You walk into the large room, never failing to take in the view of the city that the floor to ceiling windows along one wall highlight.
At the head of the large dark wood conference table, sits Bucky. His suit jacket is hanging haphazardly over the back of his chair, his tie is loose around his neck, and the crisp white sleeves of his button down are rolled up to his elbows.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Barnes. The copy machine…”
Realizing you’ve been apologizing all day, and it has made no difference, you stop yourself and lift your chin, walking over to where he sits and placing down your papers, sorting through them as quickly as possible so you can begin.
“Have you eaten dinner?” he asks.
His question takes you completely by surprise and you meet his piercing blue eyes with a confused expression.
“I uh…I had lunch.”
“That doesn’t answer my question sweetheart.”
At his sugared endearment, your eyes widen, and your breath catches in your throat, but you regain your composure.
“No. I haven’t.”
He just nods and gestures to the papers, clearly waiting for you to get started.
You lean over the table, searching for the paper you need and in your disheveled state don’t realize your entire lower body is practically draped over him.
“I just need to find…”
The words catch in your throat when you feel his fingers softly touch your thigh, slowly inching higher to reveal the tear in your stocking. His fingertips trace the sheared fabric and press against your skin, igniting it with heat.
Every muscle in your body tenses, your heart pounds in your chest and your brain screams at you to push him away but you don’t dare move.
“Look at me,” he demands, pressing his fingertips harder into your skin.
You straighten and turn to face him, his hand sliding up and over the curve of your hip to settle on your waist.
“Mr. Barnes?” you ask, keeping your eyes trained on his.
“James. Call me James.”
The intensity of his stare makes your breath catch and when he doesn’t answer and instead continues letting his hand trace your curves you battle with your emotions.
“The next time you have car trouble,” and his hand slips under your skirt again, “you call me.”
“What? Why would I?”
His fingertips graze the lace top of your stocking before he lifts your skirt higher and drops his eyes between your legs.
“Because I said so,” he murmurs, teasing along your inner thigh.
Your hand falls to the table to steady yourself and you willingly spread your legs open when he gives them a slight push.
“That’s hardly a good reason,” you breathe out.
“Fuck,” he growls, and his eyes fall closed.
You glance down at his lap and see him straining against the expensive fabric of his pants.
He smooths two fingers along the line of your panties, lightly pressing against your swollen and sensitive clit. His eyes open and he looks furious, fisting the thin material in his hand and in one quick movement, tearing it off.
He pulls you down roughly onto his lap, your skirt riding up over your hips to accommodate the wide spread of your legs as you straddle him.
An involuntary moan slips past your parted lips when he grabs your ass and drags you down over his hard cock.
When he opens his mouth to speak you grab his tie between your fingers and use it to pull his mouth to yours. Every sweep of his lips is heaven, and you release his tie to rake your fingers through his hair.
He makes a low, angry noise deep in his throat and you trail your lips along his jaw, kissing your way down the strong column of his neck.
His hand slides from your ass and slips between your legs, his fingers brushing through the wetness just before there’s a knock on the door.
You both go completely still and wait. When a second knock sounds, he quietly curses and gently lifts you off his lap.
You quickly pull your skirt down and smooth your hands over your hips. He watches your every move as he runs a hand through his mussed hair and sits up in the chair, hiding his legs and erection under the table.
“What?” he growls, loud enough for whomever is on the other side to hear.
“Mr. Barnes, we’re scheduled to do maintenance in here tonight.”
He curses again and continues to stare at you.
“I’m just finishing a meeting. Give me five minutes.”
“Of course, Mr. Barnes,” the maintenance manager, says, “take your time.”
His chest rises and falls rapidly as he splays his hands out over the tabletop. Hastily he stands and tries to straighten his tie, his eyes landing on your ripped panties that lie on the floor.
He grabs them and rubs the silky fabric between his fingers.
“Make sure you eat something,” he says and then shrugs on his suit jacket, tucking your panties into the breast pocket.
You’re clutching the table and staring as he grabs his briefcase and starts toward the door.
“It’s late. I’m going to have security walk you to your car,” he states, finally meeting your eyes.
His groan is pained as his gaze travels down your body and then he disappears out the door.
You fall back into a chair and try to calm your breathing. You’d have to be out of here in a minute and you didn’t want to look suspicious. Seeing movement outside the door you begin gathering your things and stand on still shaky legs.
With a deep inhale you straighten your shoulders and walk out the door with a serene smile, greeting the head of security and thanking him for escorting you out.
What the fuck just happened?
Tumblr media
The next morning you’re making your way into the office when he walks in. You do nothing more than greet him with a curt nod, giving him a wide berth of space as you make your way to your desk.
You can feel his eyes on you, the lick of heat traveling down your spine. You’re wearing your favorite dress and while it’s appropriate for the workspace it accentuates all the right spots, and you smile to yourself as you bend down to retrieve something from your desk drawer.
Regardless of what transpired last night you are not going to let it affect your work. You felt powerful and confident in this dress and Mr. Barnes can fuck off.
You peek over your shoulder to find him standing halfway in the doorway of his office and staring. You raise your brows and blink.
He clears his throat and mumbles a short “good morning,” then steps into his office and slams the door.
You roll your eyes and promise yourself he’ll be the last thing on your mind as you set out to get as much work done today as possible.
As lunch approaches you grab your bag and reach for your wallet. Your fingers close around a crumpled piece of paper, and you start to smile when you’re reminded of what it is.
You knock on his office door and saunter inside when he says, “come in.” The receipt hits his desk with a smack and without an explanation you turn and walk back out.
You almost make it to the first step in the stairwell when you hear footsteps approach behind you.
“Where the hell do you think you’re running off to?” he calls.
You continue walking and make it down one flight of steps before saying, “to get lunch.”
He meets you on the landing and clutches your elbow, spinning you around and pushing you against the wall.
Your eyes narrow contemptuously.
He whips the receipt out and in front of your face. “Want to explain this sweetheart?”
You let out a wry chuckle. “You know for such a smart guy you really are an ass sometimes. It’s a receipt.”
“I can see that,” he says through clenched teeth. “What I want to know is why you’re making purchases for…lingerie…on my company credit card.”
“Some jerk ripped up my favorite pair of panties last night.”
You shrug your shoulders and try to skirt past him.
His hand meets the wall next to your head, his fingers curling and crumpling the receipt and you can feel how tightly the muscles in his body are flexed when he presses closer.
He looks tormented for the split second before his lips crash down on yours and your treacherous body melts into the kiss.
His cock throbs against your stomach as he tries to hike your dress up over your thighs. Reluctantly he steps back, making enough space so he can slowly slide your dress higher, above your panties and look his fill.
“I like this pair even more than last nights,” he simpers.
His fingers hook into the lace at your hip, and you grab his shirt. “Don’t you dare Barnes.”   
“You can buy as many new pairs as you want.”
He once again easily tears them from your hips.
Your lips part in shock but he swallows your sassy remark with his mouth. The roughness of his kiss is a sharp contrast to the way his fingers softly tease between your legs.
You need more but you’ll be damned if you’re going to beg him for it. As if he can read your inner thoughts, his eyes light up in triumph when he pulls away to meet your gaze.
“As much as I want to hear you beg me for it sweetheart, I already know how badly you want it. You’re soaked for me.”
“You’re such an ass…”
He slides a finger inside you and your combined groans echo in the empty stairwell, the insult dying on your lips.
His stare is intense as he dips his head to your ear, warm lips brushing ever so gently when he whispers, “say please and I’ll give you what you want.”
Instead, you nip at his jaw, stifling the moan of need that threatens to rise in your throat. He continues pumping one finger in and out, sweat beginning to bead on his brow and his teeth gritted.
You hiss out a curse that’s followed by a breathy “please.”
You’re expecting him to be smug but instead he slows his movements and languidly pushes a second finger inside you, clearly relishing the way your eyelids flutter closed and you clench around him.
“That’s it sweetheart. Show me how much you love it when I fuck you with my fingers.”
His words practically send you over the edge but it’s the press of his thumb to your clit that makes your legs start to shake and his name fall from your lips like a prayer.
When his head falls to your neck and he places soft kisses along your skin, traveling up to your ear to whisper, “come for me gorgeous,” you let go and dig your fingernails into his strong shoulders, finishing with a muffled cry.
He draws out your pleasure with the slow push and pull of his fingers before sliding them out and holding them between you, his skin glistening under the harsh fluorescent lights.
His fingers press to his lips, parting them as he licks them clean, clearly savoring every drop of your taste.
“I knew you’d be sweet,” he croons.
“James,” you whimper when your hands fall to his pants.
He grabs your wrist to stop you and pushes your hand away. With soft movements he fixes your dress, smoothing his hands along your curves.
“But…” you start, and he silences you with a kiss.
You’re breathless and your head is fuzzy by the time he pulls away and with a wink he steps back and says, “lunch is over. We have a meeting to attend.”
He turns on his heel and jogs back up the steps with ease. Your narrowed eyes follow him before you let out a frustrated huff and walk on wobbly legs in the same direction.
You had forgotten all about the meeting…the one you were supposed to go over the plans for the night before.
When you walk into the large conference room everyone is already seated and Bucky is of course at the head of the table. His eyes are trained on you as you walk to the front and place your things down near him.
The presentation you’re giving shouldn’t take more than ten minutes, but there’s a lot riding on it and after what just happened, you’re obviously feeling flustered.
You open your document and greet and address the room, doing everything in your power to keep your focus on where it belongs and not on him.
But when you pause your eyes lock with his and your ability to speak is momentarily stolen. His gaze is intense, the heat simmering there almost palpable.
With a clear of your throat you continue, fumbling slightly but thankfully recovering quick enough that no one seems to notice. No one but him.
His perfect lips raise in a lopsided grin, and he runs his tongue along the seam of his lips. It’s clear where his thoughts are, and you must tear your eyes away to unscramble your head. He’s obviously trying to fluster you and quickly your nerves are replaced with anger, and you use it to fuel the rest of your presentation, finishing it with ease.
You sit with a smile and lift your chin, challenging him with your eyes. He stares right back.
“Thank you,” he says, addressing you by your first name as he stands and commands the room. “That was an excellent presentation. Clearly, you were well prepared.”
You can’t tell if his words are mocking or meaningful and it sets you on edge. He moves around the room and answers any lingering questions before ending the meeting with a dismissive hand.
As people stand and gather their things, Bucky comes up behind you, pressing his chest close to your back as he leans in to pretend to grab something from the table.
“I wasn’t sure you were going to make it thought that” he chuckles.
To everyone else it appears he’s making a funny remark, but you can feel your skin heat at his proximity and taunting words.
“Ugh,” you say through gritted teeth. “You would have loved that wouldn’t you?”
You can feel your eyes fill with unshed tears, the emotions of the day finally catching up to you and when his gaze finds yours his expression morphs from haughty to soft in an instant.
It only sends you reeling again, the confusion flooding through you and before he can say more you gather your things and rush out the door. Unexpectedly, he’s hot on your heels all the way to the elevator.
There are several other people on it so when you stop at the next floor and more employees file in, you’re squeezed toward the back, pushed farther into him, your ass against his crotch.
He’s hard and you feel the rest of him stiffen with the sharp intake of his breath. You take a step away from him, as much as you can in the confined space, but he reaches forward and grips your hip to pull you back.
“Don’t move,” he whispers into your neck.
“I’m two seconds away from shoving my heel up your ass,” you seethe.
He leans even closer, keeping a firm grasp on your hip.
“You were deliberately trying to make me fuck that up!”
You turn your head to peer at him and his mouth falls open, brows furrowed.
“What?” he says.
“You heard me.”
When you reach the floor just before the top, everyone else exits the elevator and the doors close, leaving you both pressed together in the corner.
It starts to move again, and you jerk backward, falling against him as he leans into the wall.
His sudden growl startles you and then he slams his hand into the stop button on the control panel.
His body cages you against the wall and his breathing is harsh.
“I would never want you to fuck anything up,” he exhales. “It’s impossible for me to think about anything but you…how good you taste, and I haven’t even gotten my mouth on you.”
You hide your surprise at his confession.
“Yet.” He adds in a promised whisper.
“This is my career at stake Mr. Barnes. You’re the one with all the power here. What do you have to lose?”
“Me? All the power?” He laughs dryly. “You’re the one who does this to me…the only one.”
You feel him throb against your stomach and you can see the truth in his eyes.
“Then don’t be such a dick all the time.”
You mean the words to come out harsh but instead they’re a quiet whisper and your expression softens.
It’s all he needs before his lips crash to yours and he slides his hands down to your ass, squeezing his way to the hem of your dress.
“I had to sit there and watch you present, the whole fucking time knowing you had nothing on under here.”
His touch is delicate as he spreads your legs and slides a finger through your folds, already wet and aching.
“I was sitting there hard as a rock just thinking about bending you over that table, tasting you, fucking you.”
Your fingers close around his biceps, the soft fabric of his suit jacket bulging under the strained muscles.
“Is that what you want?” he asks as his fingers continue to tease you.
“Yes,” you answer as you grab hold of his tie and bring his lips closer.
He kisses you, never touching you where you need it most and when he pulls away, he presses the elevator button, causing it to start moving again.
He removes his fingers and reaches up to straighten his tie and when the doors open, he backs out, his voice low and deep when he says, “I need to see you in my office. Immediately.”
He turns and glides from the elevator, his long strides carrying him quickly toward his office and you can’t do anything but follow.
Tumblr media
@blackwidownat2814 @hiddles-rose @kmc1989 @goldylions @lizette50
1K notes · View notes