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skiyoosmi · 4 years ago

Text

to the stars above | z.

featuring. zhongli (genshin impact)

genre. fluff, angst, smut, ancient-liyue!au

word count. 5.4k

marga's notes. aAAAa look look, it's my first commission!! school has kept me really occupied for like the past month but after pulling a few all-nighters, i've finally finished my responsibilities along with this little baby! once again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you to my bubs @ramannnn for trusting me with this one <33

Nobody knows when the world began, how it came to be and why it continues to be. Even I, whose mind is filled with nothing but wonder for it, have no idea. One thing I am quite sure of... is how mine did.

It all started with him— a man of many titles, different identities yet at the end of the day, all these monikers are the same; it's all him. He adored Liyue more than anything else, knew it like the back of his hand. He went where the winds lead him, stayed where the moon shines upon him, stood where the golden sun kissed his skin. He found serenity in the walks he travels as he goes about his day, the sceneries his eyes take in and the calm sounds the nature resonates for him. And as if it was fate decided upon by the Celestia, it led him to me. Suddenly, my little world that used to be nothing became everything... quickly and all at once.

An exasperated sigh escapes from my lips, frustration and disappointment filling my whole being as I stare at the blank parchment paper I held in my hands. Another day was again wasted with no progress, I thought, mentally beating myself up for not being productive enough. Before I could further drown myself into such pessimistic ideas, I snap out of it and let my eyes cherish the view that lies ahead of me. Though I feel a little guilty for taking Vermeer's place, I can only whisper an apology with little to no sincerity. Because truly, nothing can beat the picturesque landscape of Luhua Pool— the crystal clear waters that would most probably reflect my face like a mirror if I were to ever look at it, the ruins that ignited the spark of curiosity within me, wondering about the pasts it holds and the stillness and feeling of peace it gives me as I sit in this cliff. Feeling somewhat a bit better, I place my things on top of the old bag I bring no matter where I go. There's always a better day for writing, I tell myself as a form of consolation, bringing my slim arms up to begin stretching. I've been sitting on this log for quite a long time now, after all.

"It seems like you are in a bit of a dilemma," a deep voice comments from behind me. Out of surprise, I lightly jump and turn my head towards the stranger. Right at that moment, it felt as if all the air circulating inside my body had been depleted. Captivating was an understatement as to how he appeared before me. With the sunlight striking his face and accenting his unique features further, he stood with his hands behind him, head tilted as he looked at me with interest, all while keeping his dignified posture.

"Oh, hello. I am afraid so, yes," I respond, or rather, mutter under my breath since I was not really used to having sudden encounters with other people, nor am I fond of it. I tend to keep to myself, finding it much more peaceful than having to tend to others' overbearing expectations and demands which is partly the reason why I chose to live in the outskirts, far from the center of Liyue that contrasts my comfortable abode, "I apologize. I failed to realize that somebody other than Vermeer liked to stay here," I told him, arching my eyebrows a little when he let out a breathy chuckle.

"Oh, you have no need for such formal apologies. I do not always go here, at least probably not as often as the man you call Vermeer. I was simply taking a walk and I think I got carried away by Liyue's view and eventually, my feet led me here," he explains, a hint of sheepishness present in his tone, "and I guess I'll have to thank my feet for that."

Because it led me to you, interesting one. For many years, it will remain unspoken, kept by the strange man to himself and unveiled once his heart gives up from the resistance he upholds.

For the following hours of lounging around Luhua Pool, I learned a lot about the stranger— he calls himself "Morax," and like the god of Liyue, he enjoyed history and is extremely knowledgeable about it, aspiring to know and understand everything of the world, he often brews tea, even going as far as inviting me once I am free from any form of work. Just as he shared facts about himself, I did too.

"So, Cheng, you said you have a bit of a dilemma?" he inquires, slightly angling his head towards the direction of the side I'm sitting on. I nod my head up and down, mouth forming into a small pout of disappointment as I remember that today has not been that progressive.

"Yes. I am trying to write a novel, you see. Something that will leave an impact on this world so that even if I may pass, I will still live on the memories of people," I tell him, an ambitious expression present on my face. He hums, eyes going over the terraces that make up the current view we have and the two huge statues standing by the ruins, "Why so?"

I pause for a moment to think of a reply, "I guess I just do not want to let someone alone in this cold world. Wouldn't that be too cruel and sad, to just leave them with nothing?"

If I'm able to write words that will provide comfort to my readers, then maybe... just maybe the world will be less lonely... even for just a little bit. At least, that's what I thought as silence consumed us, the sun setting as if to remind us that finally, another day is nearing its end. Now, what will tomorrow bring?

"Well then, I do hope I will be able to read at least some of your works at least once," he speaks as he stands up, lightly dusting away his clothes, "It certainly has been a pleasure to be your company, Cheng."

As he walks down the slope of the hill, his somewhat broad back facing me, I call out, "Will you be back?"

He stops and turns, a soft smile is plastered on his face as he responds, "Only time will tell."

But time was no friend of mine. At least that's what I have come to realize as many days passed without him returning to this place. Though maybe it's only because it almost felt as if time slowed down and I was only eager to see him again, something I have scolded myself to— what a fragile heart do I have to already seek a stranger's presence? That is what others call love at first sight, a devilish portion of my mind whispered cheekily within me and I gasped in disbelief, "Absolutely not," I lightly slap both of my cheeks, "I'm just too coped up in my own world. I probably need to go see more people."

That thought remains a simple yearning though because once again, I find myself lounging around the same spot in Luhua, a quiet hope ignited within me, fulfilled when I hear the familiar voice he adorns as he speaks, "You're here."

I release a sound that is between a giggle and a breathy chuckle, "And I see your feet had led you here once more?"

"They were curious, or should I say... I was," he explains as he takes a seat beside me, his posture remaining solid despite the uncomfortable position.

"Of what?" I ask.

"Of you," he simply replies, unaware of the sudden yet unsurprising effect it had on my heart that was already beating rapidly with just his mere presence. I try not to be so showy of it though, too embarrassed to even think of how fast I became fond of him.

But it was no wonder. After all, he himself was an interesting one; from the way he carries himself, the way he speaks, and the way he's just him... all and every action hold so much dignity that it just leaves me almost breathless and in awe every single time my eyes finds their way to his figure— and to think that this was just our second meeting? My mother would most probably let out the most shameless giggle as I tell her these thoughts, pushing me and teasing me like a normal person in their teens would. I shake my head to get out of these thoughts, listening to Morax as he tells another wonderful tale, almost making me think that he lived it himself with how he knew it, going over even with the smallest details.

"You know, Morax, you have such a good memory to remember all of those things despite simply hearing about it," I suddenly speak up in the midst of the silence that engulfed us while he tries to think of the next story to tell, "I hope I can stay in them too... in your memories, I mean. I know I am far from being the most interesting person but for some reason, I wish for that."

He pauses, eyes trailing slowly towards me, beyond my knowledge, before he lets out a somber smile. You already are, is another one of him that becomes an afterthought.

I heaved out a sigh before shaking my head again, "Ah! Why do I keep having such lonely thoughts? Forget about that. Please do not mind me, alright? I think I really need to stop being stuck in the mountains."

I pick up my small bag and shuffle inside it, letting out a quiet sound of 'aha!' as a sort of celebration when I successfully got a small book out, "Here."

He blinked his eyes in confusion, wondering what it was I handed to him so I spoke in delight, "You told me you wanted to read at least one of my works so, here. I am warning you though, it is not like the ones that sell best in the bookstores. It might bore you, or weird you out like what others say."

"What others say?"

"They say it's too unrealistic, too impossible... but I believe otherwise. We live in a world where gods and adepti watch over us. What makes my story impossible then?" I ponder, him still being confused.

"What is it about anyway?" He asks, having no idea of what the context my book had.

"It's about an archon who began living as a simple man in Liyue."

Our meetings became more frequent after that and eventually, we got comfortable with even just the presence of each other, having no need for long talks and such, but just peace. Today, like any other day, Morax was just reading the book I gave him, while I was thinking of what my next story would be about. Occasionally, he looks at me with an odd expression that is almost equivalent to astonishment, as if I have done something so great that it made him look at me that way.

"What made you think of this plot?" he asks all of a sudden, not forgetting to put a piece of paper that served as a bookmark on the page where he stopped just in case he accidentally closed it.

I hum, thinking about my answer to his question, "Hmm. Truth to be told, it was just a mere wonder for me. Archons and the adepti, although not entirely immortal, live so much longer than an average human does, watching over us as we go about our daily lives, waiting for sudden wars to break out and then fight the enemies that attack us. Growing up, those were the things that all the people around me told me. So I began to wonder, do they ever get tired? Is it not too taxing to keep on doing that? What if... they just lived with us, among the crowds? Because I think it is too lonely wherever they are. Would it not be better if they were with us, rather than above us, so they could at least have memories to live by?"

Morax does not give a response, or rather, he finds it difficult to find one. Still, it does not stop the affection that spreads within him. He does not say it out loud, but for someone who prefers to be alone, Cheng was full of empathy. And somehow, that did wonders to Morax's heart.

"Now that I think about it, I kind of actually want to address my books to them now," I hum once more, "It would be like a message for them: Do not be too lonely even if we pass. Because of your help, through these stories, we can show you that we lived a good life."

I huff as soon as I finish my sentence, "Although one of those who read it said that was impossible, because according to them, why would archons give up their power to live a life where there is only simplicity?"

Morax let out a sound that made it look as if he got offended himself, "Archons can do that, can they not?"

"I know! That was what I was saying to them. Anyway, I am not forcing them to like what I wrote. It's just a story, after all. It can do no harm," I shrug, beginning to fix my belongings as the sun began to set, "I should go now, Morax. It is still quite a long walk to my home."

"I want to live a good life too," he suddenly tells me, making me halt and turn to him in confusion, "With you. The good life and memories you shall tell in your stories, can I be part of them too?"

The universe does not stop for anyone, nor does time— science will consistently proclaim this fact matter what timeline we shall live in. No matter how much someone begs to the Celestia to grant their wish of controlling, or stopping time, no one will be able to do such things. But somehow, it seems like when it comes to him, everything is possible as I feel my world stop at his words, just like the way it also began when I met him. And as if planets were colliding with each other, I suddenly felt my heart crash upon him and as if out of instinct, I let go of the truth.

"Of course. It would be the greatest thing to have you."

Life was strange in its own way. That is what I have come to realize in this simple life of mine.

Despite the fact that the "me" of the previous year has never even thought about putting my whole being on my sleeve, it is pleasingly odd how right now, I find myself in this kind of situation with the man who swept me right under my feet and claimed my heart as his.

“You're cold," I whisper amidst the silence of the night in my abode, my index tracing the ears of the man who had me sitting right on his lap, the shorter strands of his silky hair tucked behind them. So, so alluring.

He takes hold of my wrist, planting a soft kiss on its side, all while maintaining eye contact as he quietly drawls, "Then I suppose you can keep me warm tonight. Will you?"

As if in a trance, I nod my head, letting him take the lead as he laid me down, back against the soft mattress, him following on top with his arms supporting his build. With arising confidence, I circle my arms around him and pull him down, bringing our lips together, a sigh of relief escaping both of our mouths as if to say, "Finally."

I wonder if he thinks the same way as I do— that this was Celestia in its own way. I felt like I could do anything as long as it was with him. The kiss felt like the power we once suppressed from each other became a supernova that changed our world's course all of a sudden. But despite the tension and heat we both emitted at the moment, there is a warmth that engulfs me the same time he fully wraps his arms around me.

I am here. I will always be here.

No noise disturbs the peace we have created, only the quiet sound of crickets reach our ears but even that fails to distract him from what he's doing. He gently tugs on the sash that keeps my coat tied. Nimble fingers explore the remains of my clothing, loosening all until I am set free from them.

His eyes raked over my body, an expression of awe plastered on his face for so long that it made me somewhat conscious. Because as he unravels his to me, I am enlightened by the fact that my figure is nothing worth comparing to his — not even close. A hint of sweat glints from his skin due to the moonlight, making him look even more ethereal. But who was I to complain?

So instead, I look down, fiddling a little with my fingers as I feel my cheeks heat up. How is it that I only realize now what kind of situation we are currently in? Before I further drown in such shameless thoughts, he lifts my head up by the chin, an amused look on his usually-gentle face, "Are you feeling shy, beloved?"

I meekly nodded, to which he lets out a soft laugh and whispers, "Don't be. You are the epitome of beauty itself. If you don't believe me, allow me to show you nothing but truth tonight, I swear under the moon and all these stars."

He dips down and captures my lips in a kiss once again with more passion, if it was still even possible.

"You are made for me, as I'm made for you," he proclaims as he thrusts inside me after minutes of preparation, soft pants and groans following his statements. I can only whimper in response, pain evident in my tone at first with my hands lightly clawing at his back. I pray to the heavens above that they don't leave awful marks after this.

He halts and utters an apology, thumb caressing the bone of my cheeks while he waits for me to adjust. He scans my face after a few seconds, relief flashing in his eyes when I nod for him to continue.

"I... b..." I try to speak out but the pleasure overwrites any sensical thought that goes through my mind. He slows down a little, looking over my face and smiles, urging me to talk.

"Stay with me, beloved. We still have all night," he tells me, encouraging me to voice what has been on my mind.

"I... I belong to you, always have and always will..." I manage to croak out, voice quite hoarse due to the sounds that I let out previously. Perhaps pleased with what I have proclaimed, he begins going even deeper and at the same moment, I begin falling deeper.

"Yes, yes, you do," he repeats like a mantra, his voice sounding more and more desperate to reach his high. I cry out with him, creating a harmony that even the best bards shall be ashamed.

It was a long night— the longest yet most beautiful night I have ever had in this simple life of mine. And in that moment, as we reach the stars together, I knew right there and then that this man is someone who will be etched in my heart for as long as I live, deep into its roots— for him, it shall beat and it shall love.

You, who are reading this, most probably have had enough of these teeth-rotting praises I kept on writing. But what can I do except to apologize? These words are the only ones that can flow out of my mind and mouth to show how magnificent it was to be loved by him.

Well, nothing significant really changed. He was still the same gentleman I met, if anything, more gentle. Just like in the beginning, he made my heart flutter every chance he gets, no matter how many years have already passed.

We built a dynasty together.

But maybe I should have known that ours were also bound to crumble like the ones that have long existed even way before us.

Days, months and years went on, I realized that he was actually the opposite of me— unlike me who was clearly not parallel with time, he held it right on the palms of his hand. I was not blind, nor was I a fool, I can clearly see how he looks like he has not aged a day, all while I was here, maturing more and more each second that passed by, the amount of signs of me aging increasing significantly.

Morax. Knowledgeable of history as if he lived it himself. Time. All these thoughts eventually congest my mind as realization dawns upon me. He was not merely a man named after the god himself— Morax was him, he was Morax.

"How appalling," I mutter with a hint of sadness and dismay in my tone. I stood in front of the mirror, fingers hovering over my face, wrinkles appearing as I scrunch it. A pair of firm arms snake its way around my lean waist, chin resting on one of my shoulders as he hums his words, "What has got your beautiful mind occupied, my beloved?"

Taking hold of his arms, I turn my body around to face him, a somewhat melancholic smile etched on my face as I look up at his much taller frame, "You are a sight to behold, even to this day." He arches one eyebrow out of amusement and curiosity, wondering why I suddenly started pouring him compliments. After all, my shyness prevents me from consistently doing so. Nonetheless, I continue speaking, "I wish... I could be with you even when everything changes into a whole new world."

I lifted a hand up to cup his cheeks and began rubbing it lovingly, a lone tear finally dropping from my eye as soon as I closed it, "but I cannot, I do not have the ability to do so... I am but a mere mortal, after all."

His eyes widen as he finally discerns my actions and concerns, immediately opening his mouth in hopes of consoling me but I beat him into speaking, "It's alright, Morax. I have been putting the pieces together for a while now. I am in no way angry. I just..." I pause, gulping hard before my lips start to quiver, "... I cannot imagine how lonely it must have been. And now... I think about it and I... I do not want to leave you alone again."

My cries eventually start becoming louder, something that is very new to the both of us, seeing as I have always been composed. Love can change a person into a whole new being. I remember a book I have read once and at the moment, I can only agree. Maybe it was the way my heart clenches at the mere thought of him walking alone, or the way I can imagine us taking our last breaths together yet I know that will never happen— but either way, it was painful.

He whispers sweet nothings to my ears, placing light kisses on my temple as he leads us to the bedroom to rest once my tears have finally ceased and I have calmed down. His hold on me gets tighter every time I let out a small hiccup due to crying, almost as if he was telling me that he was feeling the same pain as I was.

Hours pass by as we lay in silence. My tears have long dried up but we remain coped up in each other's arms.

"Would it not be interesting if you bear the name Zhongli?" I ask him in a somewhat croaky voice.

He peers down and tilts his head, "Now where did that thought come from?"

I shrug, or at least try to, and look up at the ceiling as we shift our positions to lay on our back, hands finding one another and intertwining, "Hmm... nowhere. Just a name I wanted to give you in case that you are needing a new one."

"Oh? How come it would be interesting then?"

I look at him with a comforting yet sad smile.

"Because it means it's time to leave, to go somewhere far away... and unfortunately, I will have to leave soon."

He furrowed his eyebrows together, "Do not say that. Who knows? Maybe you will be able to live a hundred years by my side. Besides, I think it sounds lonely. I do not think I would want to get reminded of the fact that you are not here with me."

I hum, "But if you bear the name I gave you, wouldn't it feel like I never went away? That no matter where your feet take you, no matter how far you go, I am and will always be with you, just as I have vowed."

The wooden door leading to my writing room slowly slides open and Morax's head peers in, an adorable smile plastered on his face, "You have been quite busy these days, beloved. I do not wish to disturb you but I am starting to long for your presence."

I let out a shameless giggle, "Alright, alright. Just let me write down a few more words while I still have ideas to input."

He peeks on the parchment paper out of curiosity, taken aback when he finds his name on it, "You are writing about us?"

I nod proudly, "My last piece."

"... But why?"

I smile and approach him, taking his hand and placing my forehead against his after he lowers his head down to my level, "I told you, did I not? I do not wish to leave the person I love with nothing. So that you will not be lonely, my words will be with you. I will be with you, always..."

"... and to tell the gods... to tell you, that I loved every second of my life with you— that it was, indeed, a good life."

"Who are you, young man? Are you my son?" I speak with a very hoarse voice, squinting my eyes at the figure in front of me, as if my poor vision will allow me to do that.

I hear a melancholic yet gentle sigh come from him before he takes my rough hands and looks afar, "Don't mind me. I'm just someone who vowed to be with you for as long as time lets us."

"Oh.... really? That’s quite endearing," I hum, "Well, may I know your name?"

"This… I think I may just have an idea to whom this book is for," Paimon trails off, looking over at the traveler who was in the same trance as her, "Paimon thinks we should let the strange person we saw a while ago give this directly to Zhongli!"

Lumine nods, turning around and starting to run towards the direction they were at previously, recalling the person named Cheng who gave them the novel they just finished reading. They were unique, dressed in layers of robes and it was almost as if they lived in the old times of Liyue. Even the way they talked and moved screamed ancient.

Just as they turned the corner, a woman near the Liuli Pavilion called them over, "Traveler! Here!" As they approach, Lumine cranes her neck to look around the area but to no avail, the strange person was long gone.

"Are you two alright?" the woman asks, much to their confusion, "I saw you talking to literal air awhile ago and I was worried you have eaten something strange."

The pair looks at each other in surprise before Paimon replies, "You didn't see anyone? Like a person dressed in the strangest attire? They dressed really anciently!"

The door of the Liuli Pavilion opens and there goes Zhongli, a calm expression morphing to an awkward one when he realizes he barged into an ongoing conversation. He apologizes for the disturbance and despite the curiosity he had upon overhearing bits of Paimon's statements, he starts his walk back to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. At least not until he hears Paimon call his name, "Zhongli! Wait! A person named Cheng. Do you know them?"

He abruptly stops and turns to the two, eyes wide for a second before it returns to his usual demeanor, "How... how do you know of them?"

"We met them," Paimon says, as if it was the simplest thing to do, "Well, honestly, we don't know because we were apparently speaking to nothing but air! It's so odd!"

He stays still, honestly having no idea of what response he should give them because he himself found it hard to believe.

"Well anyway, they asked us to give you this nov— wait, where is it? It was just in your hands a while ago, Traveler!"

In the midst of the loud chaos made by the two in the middle of Liyue, he thinks he knows what to do and where to go now.

It was the day of the Rite of Parting, an event where he's supposed to be taking part of, even just a part of the audience. But he finds himself hanging around the Wanwen Bookhouse, eyes scanning the shelves until it stops at a familiar name engraved on the cover of a book.

"Oh! Greetings, Mr. Zhongli! I see you took a liking to a very great and romantic novel," Jifang comments as she sees the book in his hands.

He looks at her, "Is it really great?"

She gasps in delight, "Yes, indeed! Almost all of the Liyue folks have enjoyed this story! You can say it is a classic, especially for readers! Cheng definitely outdid themselves with this one! Such a mysterious person yet equally amazing. Imagine? Being able to make such a beautiful love story with Morax? They don’t mention the present name they gave Morax though, such a shame. Maybe it was due to old age, they wrote it until the last moments of their life after all. Anyway, I have to get back to work but enjoy reading that masterpiece!"

He feels his heart swell in pride upon knowing his lover had his wish come true. His nimble fingers carefully open the pages of the book and hours later, as he sat inside the Funeral Parlor after taking the novel home, he finds himself absorbing each and every word Cheng have written, the loneliness sitting idly inside him subsiding little by little.

I found solace in the countless cups of tea you brew whenever I encounter distress with my works, the endless stories you tell with a smile so beautiful that not even the most heavenly scenery can vanquish, but most of them all, the feeling of your hand intertwining with mine, providing me with serenity no one else has ever done before. Under the moonlit night of Liyue, I remember your wistful amber eyes, staring deep into my soul as you proclaim your love and desire for me. How foolish was it of me to think that I could live this life without even experiencing such warmth and intimacy?

It is a banality, really — how I wish to become a well-known writer with unique tales and yet the story I am telling is something so common to folks that they have most probably heard similar ones before. But I guess this is what it means to love and to be loved. Everything is like a cycle that just keeps on being repeated, yet we never get tired of it, of the feelings it brings. So, thank you, Morax. Words will never be sufficient to show how grateful I am to you for showing me a whole new world but I suppose this is still a way for me to give back to you.

With this little book of mine, I hope my heart reaches yours regardless of how many eras may have passed before and after us. So, my beloved, do not be too lonely without me. Even if you find yourself longing for my presence, just open this and my heart shall be with you.

This belongs to you, it always will.

And I do, as well.

#genshin impact #zhongli #genshin x oc #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #zhongli x oc #zhongli x reader #genshin headcanons #zhongli headcanons #genshin scenarios #genshin fic #genshin fluff #genshin smut #zhongli smut #zhongli imagines

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takonei · 3 years ago

Text

Beta AU - Main story, Chapter 6, Trial (Part 7)

Note of the author: And I failed posting in a month. Also I have to remake the entire Beta AU info sheet because I changed my name. AAAAA- Anyway, have fun!~

Chapter 6: My killing game, our killing game

...

Shuichi could only hope he would get clear answers. He knew he shouldn't take it for granted, but a part of him was fully convinced the mastermind would keep her promise to tell the truth for rest of the trial.

As the long silence settled, he could only watch Kirumi choose her words carefully. Was this subject harder to explain, or would she break the pattern by lying or covering the truth?

"Well, well, well... What do you think he meant?" Monokuma answered in her place.

... Of course they would break the pattern now of all times. It was foolish to even consider excluding the possibility.

The bear did seem to genuinely want an answer. Do they really have to go back to this game of guessing like they did before?

The participants shared glances, silently agreeing that it was useless to bother answering.

"Come on, don't be shy! Guesses are never dumb, except when they are!" he cheered, as if that would motivate them even slightly.

Kirumi, who was watching from her throne, at least seemed to have a bit more awareness of the general mood.

Lifting her head from the palm of her hand, she asked. "... Do you know why I recruited Rantaro in the killing game?"

...

That was not what he had expected. It did seem like a genuine question as well, but how could they even take a guess? They knew nothing about their standards. They didn't know why they had been accepted, though Shuichi now had a good guess why he had been accepted.

But that didn't change the fact that he didn't have a single idea what the criteria for everyone else were.

Though, why bringing up Rantaro this way?

"How should we know? You just showed us a video where Shuichi said you could rewrite our personalities. I don't know what your fucking standards are." Kaito mumbled, breaking their collective silence.

The judge hummed. "Fair enough. Criteria should have been defined properly from the start."

"Oh my! Why didn't you just say so?~" the bear sang. "Perhaps indeed, our standards should have been made clear to our audience!"

Shuichi couldn't help but swallow in dread. He knew they wouldn't like the answer. But Monokuma and Kirumi were the only source of information about their past-selves that they had.

"Ah... Standards... Truly a subjective thing, isn't it? It comes and goes like the gentle tides in the morning breeze... Sometimes it's harsh, sometimes it's sweet! But no one will ever be able to truly understand them, and even less control them!"

Shuichi saw in Kaito's eyes that he regretted reproaching Kirumi about her nonsensical metaphors when Monokuma was even worse.

"Standards are unpredictable, they always differ from one to another based on pointless parts of ourselves... One could even say it is quite despairful! But that's what makes it exciting! No one knows which person will be the chosen one! Someone could walk in singing long tales of passion and pride, and yet they will be nothing next to the person with the funny hair color!"

"It only comes down to the mastermind's desires! But it always has been the shiniest gems in the gravel pile that managed to rise up to the top, those who have this tiny spark of excitement, of uniqueness! And it can be anything!"

'Anything' included his parents' wealth, it seems.

"If the person you are truly had nothing to do with the criteria, then we wouldn't have interviewed you, nor any of the candidates for that matter. We could have picked based on appearance, and that would have been the end of the story. Trust me, your looks had nothing to do with your presence here." Kirumi continued.

"No. The reason you're here is because you four and the ten other participants were interesting people to us. You had your own character, your own experiences, your own skills that were unique and stood out from the rest."

"What could I have possibly seen in Rantaro to think he was a suitable candidate for the game? Well... I would have laughed if someone had told me it was what would cause my downfall."

Miu's expression turned to dread. "Hold on... Why did you...?"

Kaito, on the other hand, didn't seem to like her answer. "Don't change the subject! We asked you about the flashback lights, what does this have to do with it?!"

What followed was a long silence as the latter was set on glaring at her until she would give an answer.

...

"Rantaro was a genius."

Kirumi's tone was flat. She didn't even seem mad, she looked... resigned.

"He was smarter than all of us combined. If he wanted to, he could have been the true mastermind of the game, and it's not like any of us would have stood a chance."

"But that? I understood it too late. I recruited him for his outstanding intellectual capacities. But truth is, I didn't know what I was getting myself into when I decided to keep them intact for the rewrite despite not even knowing how far they went."

"I didn't know what plans and theories he was going to come up with during the game. I didn't know if he was ever going to unmask me way before the sixth and final investigation. And while I did expect him to be a force to be reckoned with..."

"... I sure as hell didn't expect him to uncover almost everything there is to know about the flashback lights."

...

She had recruited him for his intellect... And he was actually right about everything he said...?

Did that mean everything they felt and their experiences were truly just lies Team Danganronpa injected in their brains?

"So the Gopher project... And everything else..." Miu muttered.

"That's just the tip of the iceberg." Kirumi stopped her. "Think about every single memory you possess, I can assure you it's not real."

Kokichi swallowed. "The incident... My friends at the orphanage... My entire life struggling to stay alive..."

"... It never happened." she finished his sentence. "Even your trauma was fabricated. Your mind was not that messed up before the game."

Kokichi fell silent. Shuichi couldn't even begin to imagine how it felt to have the guilt and psychological consequences of a catastrophe that actually never happened.

"There was no lonely boy roaming the streets to find bits of unfinished food not to starve, one of the sole survivors of an atrocious plague that destroyed his home city because of a karma strike, abandoned by the friends of his orphanage who saw him as nothing but a bad omen."

"Just like there was no famous biker whose determination to ride cost him his right leg at the age of thirteen, but still continued to train with his disability out of pure passion and hard work, becoming a champion without the world even knowing about his handicap."

"Just like there was no street artist living under the name 'Firefly of the city', making herself known for her legendary fluorescent artworks, being a strong and autonomous mother figure who took a child under her care and loving him like her own son."

"And just like there was no descendant of a family of musical prodigies, who despite a shy and reclusive nature, could display an unreal passion for his instrument that only the luckiest ones could witness."

...

So what Rantaro had said about his own past...

... Was actually true not just for himself but for everyone else as well.

He had heard it back in the courtroom just a few hours ago, but now it felt... Different.

Acknowledging the theory and it getting confirmed were truly different things.

Or perhaps it was the state he was in in both situations that made the sentence sing a different note. A state of overwhelming shock, the surreal lullaby of uncanny madness from a fallen soldier- versus post-acceptance, the sonata of truthfulness from the empress of lies, and the cycle of denial was reborn once again.

The first thing that came to his mind was the riddle he was given back when the Sanzu Garden motive had just started.

The long braids of lavender, the elder-sister figure of his life, fading into purple pellets flying away in the wind. Those moments of complicity- all gone, worthless delusions crumbling to pieces.

The concerts he had performed in, the musical training of his cousin he had assisted to, the loud meetings with the great musicians of the family, all reduced to silence.

The laughs he had shared with her as they were hiding with stolen cookies, the cries he had let out as he scrapped his knee in the garden, the disgust for the exact same three vegetables they both hated, all those insignificant things that didn't look so insignificant now.

Nothing. It was all gone.

...

No. It never existed in the first place.

Nostalgia was a distant attachment he had to let go but couldn't bring himself to. His past before the game was the only source of pure happiness that he had, and the only real memories he made were tainted by sorrow and dread.

Who was she, really? Was she someone present in his real childhood? How had they changed her in his memories? Was she still the big sister she always had been to him or was she laughing wickedly at his misery behind a screen?

What about his uncle, that he had considered as his father figure? Did he watch him throw himself into the arena as the main character? Had no one tried to stop him, or did they encourage him to make a deal with the devil?

All those questions he would never have answers to because he would certainly die before getting them.

As much as he hated Monokuma, he was right.

The only thing that could come out of the killing game... was pure despair.

...

How did Rantaro feel when he found out about all of this...?

"And I believe it goes without saying..." Kirumi somehow interrupted his internal existential dread in a blink of an eye. "... That the cunning hitwoman from the most feared mercenary organization in Japan, who used her inability to suffer as her strength and whose skillset was unmatched by even the most dangerous killers in the country... Never existed either."

"Lies, lies and lies again!" Monokuma cheered. "We thank the instigators for being such wonderful actors! Oh, to be able to embody the very soul of the character you crafted... It truly is a gift of life, don't you think? Though..."

"... We might have to thank our flashback lights as well for the great help they provide to our beloved masterminds!"

Something clicked in Shuichi's mind as he finally managed to shove aside the poisoned thoughts corrupting him.

The flashback lights... Of course neither Kirumi nor Tatsuya, the masterminds, were given any to alter their memories. They were mere actors, impostors playing with people who were in reality fictional characters.

But... Something wasn't right. He remembered clearly who stood out when they had checked the files. It wasn't as if Kirumi hadn't used any flashback lights. They had searched the laptop, she had files of her own: For certain 'chapters', a character file and a talent file.

As for Tatsuya, he was just like Kirumi, but without those two files.

"The character files... While you did have one, Tatsuya didn't." Shuichi frowned at Kirumi. "And that's the same thing for the talent file."

"Ohhhhh! You're riiiight!" Monokuma put a paw on his mouth, feigning surprise. "But perhaps, you are not taking into consideration a certain detail!"

"Which is?" Kaito raised an eyebrow.

"Puhuhu! That's for you to find out, of course!" he laughed.

And back they were to the guessing games.

Certain spotlights turned off to give a more serious atmosphere. It was clear they didn't have a choice but to obey.

"Shall we spice things up for a change?" the bear slid his paw on the surface of the podium in front of him, revealing a multitude of buttons. He immediately slammed one and grinned.

The TV turned on again to reveal a countdown of one minute.

"Good luck finding that oddity!"

And thus, the countdown began.

00:59.

And he didn't want to know what would happen at the end of it.

00:58.

Shuichi snapped out of his thoughts and looked at his friends, panic written on his face.

"A difference between the two?!" Miu repeated. "Wait, shouldn't their situations be the same?"

"I don't know what the 'character' file means exactly, but... Perhaps we can get something out of the 'talent' one?" Kokichi suggested.

The so-called protagonist started to think. Kirumi was a 'mercenary'. Tatsuya was a 'robotics engineer' who faked amnesia.

"Maybe it has something to do with what sort of talent they had? Kirumi's was more physical and Tatsuya's was more about knowledge..." he said. "Tatsuya pretended to have amnesia so he wouldn't have to fake a talent. And since his official talent was knowledge based, none of us would have suspected a thing after finding out what it was because it wasn't anything related to his physical abilities, but rather what his amnesia had erased!"

"Are we gonna ignore the obvious fact that he was a goddamn robot?!" Kaito retorted. "It could have been added some way or another without flashback lights!!"

"But Keebo was-

Shuichi interrupted himself when he realized that the countdown had stopped.

"That... That was it? It was that simple?" Kokichi muttered.

"Was the countdown necessary?!" Miu glared at Monokuma. "Or was it just to fuck with us?!"

"Aw, you probably shouldn't ask questions you already know the answer of!"

... Of course.

"Anyway, you two planned from the start that Tatsuya was going to fake amnesia, right?" Shuichi changed the subject.

"Indeed. Though, while that is the reason why he didn't have a talent file... It's something else entirely when it comes to the character file." Kirumi answered. "The very first flashback light he used was the one we used after the first trial. The one labelled 'chapter 2'. It's because he didn't need any of them before."

Chapter 2...?

Was this what she had referred to as 'acts' when she revealed herself as the mastermind?

In that case, the chapters just meant the period of time that included their daily life, the motive, the murder and the trial.

Which must be how things work in this show.

"The real reason why he didn't receive those two flashback lights is directly linked to the fact that in this game, I am human, and he was not." Kirumi explained.

"The human brain is complex. You could say it's a computer more powerful, but also more prone to failure. There are hazards that we can only kneel before, like physical or psychological trauma, but it can also come in much simpler forms."

"Do you really think I'm naturally that talented of a liar to have been able to deceive you all for three full weeks, including a therapist and several intellectual geniuses?"

This sounded... Very unlikely, but Kirumi had always managed to surprise them. He wouldn't have been surprised if that was the case.

"Even the most talented of gamblers and actors have flaws, though finding them is as hard as finding a needle in a haystack. Whether it's a hand gesture, a blink, unconscious reflexes... It's all those small actions that can out you as a liar."

"The character file that was used on me never altered my personality itself. It was no rewrite, it was an upgrade. A near complete extermination of all the defaults I had, all those little bits of dust that could ruin the entire game, reduced to nothing." she continued. "You have seen what the flashback lights can do to someone, right? Well, in my case..."

"... It just made me someone whose lies and truths are almost absolutely identical."

So the flashback lights didn't just serve to 'rewrite' their brains, but they were also a way to perfect themselves...? But if she truly was a perfect liar, then... How did Kiyo find out about her involvement with Kokichi during the aftermath of the third trial...?

And more importantly, how can he judge the authenticity of her words now? He was just starting to think she was truthful about everything, but she could have lied about her oath of integrity to take them under her spell once again, just like she did during the entire game.

"As for the talent file, well... I don't think I need to explain what it did."

"You just said you're a master liar yet you expect us to believe something that stupid?" Kaito spat out. "There's no way a flashback light did the entire job for you, or any of us actually."

"I can believe you somehow managed to make Maki an expert tailor, or Miu a talented artist, but there's no way some flashlight gave you that strength and agility."

He angrily pointed at her. "You're literally almost as much of a muscle mountain as Gonta! How do you explain that??"

Kaito raised a good point. Some things just can't be changed, right? His divine hearing, the incredible strength of about half of the participants... All those things that were not linked to the brain, but to the body itself. Something was wrong, and no amount of flashback lights could make them believe such lies.

"As I said, the flashback lights for me were nothing more than an upgrade. The strength I have, it's all natural. Because I had decided my title would be the ultimate mercenary, I was required to go under training... For three years I trained so I could be worthy of that title. The flashback lights only enhanced my reflexes and dexterity."

"This is the special treatment that our beloved masterminds get for free!" Monokuma cheered. "Since none of them would ever get their memories replaced, and thus, have a backstory that fits with their talent, it's only natural they get the training they deserve!"

Kirumi hummed. "No matter how much is rewritten via flashback lights, there will always be a dissonance remaining between what you think you can do and what you can actually do, especially when you have no fake backstory to back it up. Exercice trains both the body and the mind, one cannot work without the other."

"It's the same for the rest of you. Most of your talents are related to what you could do before the rewrite. We cannot make a true athlete out of someone who has never practiced any sports in their life. Whether it's an advanced hearing, art techniques, or as Kaito said, muscle mass, it's all enhancement when it comes to talent."

"Then what about my talent?"

Shuichi froze.

Everyone's eyes turned to the one person who didn't match any of the examples Kirumi threw out.

Kokichi.

"What did you do to me?"

...

Kirumi let out a bitter laugh. "As Monokuma said..."

"Don't ask questions you already know the answer of."

Shuichi frowned. The karma... The file...

The flashback light file...

...

"Kokichi didn't have a talent file." he mumbled.

It was as if the same conclusion echoed in all of their minds at once.

"Nothing."

Kirumi bluntly said.

"Nothing, is what I did to you."

Which meant Kokichi...

"You... You didn't..." he swallowed. "You didn't give any talent to me...?"

"Puhuhu... But what is there to give?" Monokuma taunted him. "The wheel of fate is for us to spin, not you!"

Kokichi paled. "Are you saying..."

"Indeed."

"Karma never existed in the first place."

The white haired boy stared at her in horror.

It was the only logical outcome of this... So why were they even surprised?!

"No. You're bullshitting. So many things happened that were only because of karma!" Miu yelled back.

"Puhuhu... Out of all the lies you could have decided to cling to, you chose the fictional concept of supernatural justice that punishes the worst monsters of this world?! Hahahahaha!"

Monokuma laughed harder than they had ever seen him do before.

As the robotic cackles filled the room, all eyes turned to Kokichi, who was still processing that not only was his life fake... But the power that had defined him was also completely artificial as well.

While put like that, it should have been obvious from the start, he still had trouble believing rationality when karma had been a part of their reality for so long.

"Shut up!! How do you explain me getting the code right on first try then, back in the hangar?!" Miu retorted.

"Whatever code that was typed in would have opened the door." Kirumi replied. "The only thing required was to type 50 numbers. Not less, not more."

"If you're curious, you got exactly 8 numbers right out of 50." Monokuma added. "Which isn't a lot, but hey! It's still more than average!"

"What about the spears that almost killed me, huh?!" Kaito argued. "Are you saying you managed to aim at Kokichi and still perfectly predicted my movements so the spears would only pierce my fake leg?!"

"They were aimed at you from the start, and Kokichi was never part of the equation. Also, you would be surprised by how precise an automated shooter can be."

It was clear Miu and Kaito did not believe their own arguments. They were blinded by their rage, refusing to believe a basic truth simply because it came out of their mouths.

The latter slammed his hands on the podium. "And what about the card games then?! How do you explain Miu being that lucky whenever we played?!"

Kirumi sighed, once again pressing some button from under the armrest. She extended her arm and something fell from the ceiling directly in her hand. It was... A card game?

"Catch." She threw it at Kaito, who inspected it. A regular card game from Kokichi's lab. "Now shuffle it."

"What?" Kaito raised an eyebrow.

"Do you want an answer to your question or no?" she glared at him.

Still doubtful, he shuffled it thoroughly.

"The first card you're going to pick is the 3 of hearts. Then the 9 of diamonds and then... The queen of spades." she said.

Kaito swallowed and picked the first card. It was obvious from the look on his face that she was right.

Then he picked the second.

And the third.

He looked at the card that was supposedly the queen of spades for a long time, eyes widened in confusion and frustration.

"How...?"

"Now put it in the middle and pick the card at the bottom of the deck. Let me guess... Is it the queen of spades again?"

He once again did as told, and...

It was clear from his frightened expression that she had guessed right, as impossible as it sounded.

"These cards have a special feature. Whatever is displayed on them is remotely controlled by Team Danganronpa in the studios." she explained. "It's not that hard to create rigged card games like these nowadays."

"Karma never existed because the people behind the scenes were making it themselves, in the form of small actions such as these."

"But how could we forget?!" Monokuma continued. "Some of it resides somewhere other than in ridiculous card games and simple codes!"

"Then what?!" Kokichi cried out. "What did you do to make me believe I was a living supernatural catastrophe?!"

It was heartbreaking hearing him scream in despair. At least Shuichi's talent, despite being artificial, was real. But Kokichi's was just the creators of the game messing with them.

"Puhuhu... Perhaps you should ask our beloved protagonist!"

Kokichi's head turned to him in a fraction of a second, ghostly lavender eyes staring at him as if he had just betrayed him. Something that made his blood curdle, even though Shuichi knew he wasn't hiding anything.

"Huh...?"

Before he could understand what Monokuma was trying to say, the bear pressed a button on his own podium, making all the survivors' spotlights turn off but the one Shuichi was under.

Of course they had to play that stupid game again.

Kirumi was also in the light. Which meant whatever Monokuma wanted him to point out was something they had found together.

Ryoma's notebook? No, nothing was written about Kokichi specifically.

So it was in the mastermind's room... Something both of them had inspected.

But there wasn't anything linked to Kokichi specifically, was there?

...

Oh no.

Not them.

"Please don't tell me that's what I think it is." he muttered.

"Puhuhu... Puhuhuhu!" Monokuma laughed. "Of course it is!"

Just the thought of it was enough to give him chills, so mentioning it out loud? It was completely out of the question.

"Shuichi... You knew...?"

He perked up at the accusation. "No I-

Shuichi suddenly withdrew his foot from the ground, letting out a faint high-pitched yelp. He swore he had sensed something touching his foot.

He knew the others were looking at him weirdly. Had they seen it? Or was he hallucinating?

"What is it then?!" Kokichi yelled at him.

But how could he even answer without making things even worse than they already were?!

The light slowly filled the room again, just enough so they could distinguish each other.

"It's... Kirumi and I we..."

He was stumbling on his own words. Great.

Shuichi swallowed. "Kirumi and I found... tiny robots in the mastermind's room." he explained the best he could. "I accidentally released them but- There were so many of them, I-

A high-pitched squeal interrupted him, coming from Miu. She had turned around to check something without success, and thus was left with only dread and confusion. "What the hell just crawled up my back?!"

It didn't take long for him to understand what was going on, and the fear rising inside of him was starting to spread, slowly but surely.

"Puhuhu..."

Of course. Of fucking course.

"Puhuhuhuhu!"

Of course Monokuma had to bring them in.

"Well well, my dear participants, I am overjoyed to present you..."

"... The Kichikumas!"

So that's what these abominations were for? Creating 'karma' by messing with them?

"The... What...?" Kokichi muttered, baffled by hearing his own name mixed with the mascot's.

"The karma itself!" he cheered. "They're such adorable little fellas who look like-

"-Undesirable animals." Kirumi finished his sentence. "Their job was to cause those little events that one could interpret as karma. Sometimes it was pushing an object off a roof or a shelf, sometimes it was revealing a clue that the killer had left behind if their intentions were malicious... That's what they were for. And of course, they never did anything to Tatsuya nor I since they were programmed not to from the start."

"Justice is a lie, karma is not real, and the wheel of fate is a toy only those in absolute power can play with."

Shuichi could only lower his eyes in shame for having believed in this fake justice.

The mastermind took a glance at them. "... I think they got the message. Those pieces of scrap metal have no use being here now." she said as she waved a hand. The creatures must have understood because they all started fleeing at once.

The metallic rattle of those little horrors running around to find an exit was loud enough for everyone to hear. While Kaito and Miu stared at them in awe, Kokichi had his eyes shut and hands slammed on his ears.

Even when the noise was gone, he could still feel the oppressive atmosphere, but at least the room was not infested with those mechanical rats anymore.

Kaito leaned to the side and put a hand on Kokichi's shoulder to tell him they had left.

The latter looked scared, but it could have been way worse.

"It was tricky to figure out all the ways luck could be influenced. The kichikumas could only change object placement, which in itself is already a lot, but it's mainly the other little things that made karma a concept all too real in this killing game." Kirumi continued. "All those little scenes were added for this silly game of make-believe, even I was sometimes fooled by it."

"But everything related to karma was planned by Team Danganronpa, that's all there is to it. Lies and wicked justice."

And it should have been obvious from the start. But after being spoon-fed this lie for weeks and with the boundary of reality and madness fading away as time passed, the reveal that it was only a part of their madness could only be shock-inducing.

Tenko, Maki, Angie and Kiyo... They never stood a chance because Monokuma had an excuse to out them anyway.

Blaming everything on karma was so easy that no one could question it.

Everything including...

The death of...

...

Shuichi snapped out of his thoughts. He knew this wasn't something that would leave everyone indifferent.

"But then... If karma isn't real... Then Kokichi's reverse disease back then wasn't real either, right? Hence the lack of file for it!"

The latter turned to him with wide eyes. "Which... Which means..."

"... That you were never responsible for Himiko's death in the first place. Not even partially." Shuichi concluded.

At that, Kirumi laughed. "Indeed, Kokichi's part of the despair disease was just a way to flesh out the drama. What one would call cheap shock value."

That's what this entire game was, after all. Unnecessary horror on top of more misery to please an audience addicted to drama. And of course, they would pay the price for it.

"In that case... The rest of the motives were just for shock value as well." he said. "Just ways to make us suffer."

Kirumi stared at him for a moment, then smiled.

"I feel like there is more rationality to this than I first thought."

What...?

"How so? You have seen what they are doing to us."

What was she on about? Was she talking to herself?

"I doubt the mastermind would simply want to make us suffer and kill each other. I know there is more to this but I do not have a slight idea of what their real intentions are."

No. She was quoting someone. But who?

"Hey, what the fuck is with you?!" Kaito spat out. "Quit it!"

"Perhaps the most perceptive people in the audience know what I'm referring to. But to answer your question..."

"... The motives were anything but shock value, and it's about time to review them one by one."

She extended her hand to reveal a book. It was...

... Ryoma's notebook?

She had taken it without him realizing?!

It's with a smug smile that she opened the book with her thumb and blocked it on a certain page. "Well then."

"Shall we begin?"

#ndrv3 #danganronpa v3 #ndrv3 au #beta au #main story

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hypmicdaydreams · 4 years ago

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hellooo~ may i request a fic of dice and his s/o dancing together in their house? (i thought abt this idea while listening to rises the moon by liana flores ! im not sure if its a dancing type of song but its really cute so aaaaa)

Heyo anon! I'm so in love with this idea omg,,, it's simply way too cute! And that song is honestly so good, so thank you so much for introducing me to it <3 I hope you don't mind the length of this fic, but I really did love the idea sm! Thank you for this adorable request and hope you enjoy 💕

-pairing: dice arisugawa x gn!reader

-genre: fluff

-summary: this was turning out to be another typical saturday night, but thankfully, you come up with an idea to save both you and dice from boredom: a slow dance in your very own living room

-word count: ~1.8k

you couldn’t help but think that tonight had been a bit of a slow night, or so it was shaping up to be one. the night was still quite young after all, but as winter was approaching, the days grew shorter and shorter, and by the time it was eight o’clock, it simply felt like the clock had chimed in at midnight. the fact that nighttime was beginning to set in much sooner didn’t help with your drowsiness in the slightest. the shorter days meant longer nights, which pretty much meant that your body grew tired much more quickly now given the darkness outside.

there really wasn’t much to do despite it being a saturday night. you were much too tired to even think about going out on a little stroll or even to a club of some sort. plus, it was only around nine or so right now; it was much too early for any late night adventures. stargazing was pretty much out of the question given the many streetlights that were never shut off; one of the cons of living in such a large and busy city. and so you were currently spending the night the same as any other night: cooped up at home, cuddling on the couch with your cute boyfriend.

even if you were currently bored out of your mind, it wasn’t all that bad. you had dice by your side after all, and his presence was something. honestly, even if you spent all night cuddling with dice and watching tv or simply chatting the night away with him, it wouldn’t really be that bad of a night, at least when you reflected back on it the next day. dice was always so entertaining, and his mere presence was more than enough to kill your boredom for some time.

but as much as you loved dice and his eccentric self, you were still currently bored. the two of you had pretty much exhausted every single activity you guys had in the house. you’ve played monopoly with him more times than you can remember (the outcome was the same too; he always ended up bankrupt each time), and cards were also starting to become repetitive and boring. at first, the small bets you guys made during the games were exciting and fun. you both always concentrated on the game at hand and did your best to win so that the other had to wash dishes for the next week or clean the bathrooms. but those also began to grow boring with time. honestly, life was just one big, boring mess.

and so you were currently sitting on the couch, scrolling through your phone and switching between the same three or so apps as you listened to music through your headphones. dice was playing solitaire on the carpet, though he was currently losing, and the two of you didn’t really say a word to each other at the moment. there wasn’t much to talk about anyway, and sometimes, you both needed a bit of alone time. but even then, that was all too boring. your phone had nothing interesting at the moment, and the music you were listening to started to become simple background noise that you began to zone out. you were still bored.

but as you were skipping through songs, you landed on a particular one that caught your attention, and the moment you heard it, you got an idea.

“dice,” you called out, taking off your headphones and standing up from your place on the couch.

“hm?”

“let’s dance.”

you didn’t really give him much time to respond much less get up from his place on the floor as you grabbed his hands and pulled him up. despite doing pretty much everything the two of you could think of, there was one thing that you never did: dance. perhaps you both were embarrassed to dance in front of the other or maybe you guys couldn’t dance at all; either way, you didn’t really care. you were in the mood to dance, and dancing with dice seemed like a great way to spend the night. honestly, doing anything with dice was always a great time simply because you were doing it with him. spending time with him, no matter the activity, was always your favorite thing.

“woah woah woah!” he exclaimed, tripping over himself as he was pulled up by you. dice had no idea what had gotten into you at the moment, but it was always nice to see you so excited. but dancing? now that was new. dice was always up to try something new with you, no matter what it was, but dance seemed to be quite the odd choice. “babe, i don’t even know how to dance!”

“neither do i.” turning up the volume on your phone, you put the song on loop and threw your phone onto the couch, a bit giddy at the thought of you and dice dancing together. the song you had chosen was a bit of a slow and soft one, and you weren’t even quite sure if it was a song that people even danced to, but you didn’t care in the slightest. all that mattered right now was the fact that you were going to be slow dancing with dice.

immediately, you wrapped one arm around dice’s waist and the other intertwined with his, laying on his chest in the process. you could hear his heartbeat, and it was so calming that you were sure that you were going to fall asleep in no time at all (you could also hear how rapidly his heart was beating at the moment, and you thought that it was quite adorable). honestly, you weren’t even sure if this was the correct form at all, but you didn’t mind as long as you were close to dice, who was quite flustered at your sudden contact right now.

“heh, you’re so spontaneous babe…”while he certainly was flustered at the sudden intimacy, dice also couldn’t help but grin. you didn’t really act on your impulses that often, well, not compared to him anyway. so to see you so riled up over something and simply throwing him into it was quite amazing to say the least. it was rather adorable if he did say so, and dice loved that spontaneity of yours. it may be sparse, but it never failed to surprise him (in a good way) each and every time. plus, he always loved it whenever you guys closed the gap between one another since he practically lived for your warmth and touch. and so, dice followed in your lead, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you in closer, if that was even possible. this was sure to be worth it. “...but i love that ya know.”

slow dancing with dice was certainly something to say the least. for one, neither of you really knew what you were doing, so both of you were simply moving around the living room floor, wrapped up in each other’s embrace. secondly, since you guys were so close to each other and were pretty much amateurs, both of you often stepped on each other one too many times, mostly dice too given his clumsiness. and thirdly, the song had been on loop for who knows how long at this point, and you and dice were starting to get annoyed at it. despite that all, however, it was still a good time.

“wait, i have an idea,” you said out of the blue, breaking the silence. you did love the entire mood that you had set previously, but the bright lights of the living room was really throwing you off. they dampened the soft mood that was there, and you wanted to find a way to get rid of it.

sure the city lights outside were a bit off-putting, but opening the curtains and allowing that light to filter in was more than worth it. rather than the harsh lights of your living room, you were met with softer ones that filtered in through your windows, and if you looked hard enough, you could even make out the sliver of moonlight that had managed to make its way in. slow dancing in the living room with dice was great, but slow dancing in the dark with the only light being that of the outside world was even better.

“that’s much better,” you muttered, making your way back to dice and laying on his chest once more.

“you’re a genius babe! gahh, it’s so cool now.” it was rather adorable how dice couldn’t hide his excitement. even in the dark, you could practically make out the sparkles in his eyes, though that was also thanks to the light of both the passing cars and the moon that illuminated his features. gosh, he looked even more handsome under it all.

with the entire atmosphere as well as the darkness, the slow dancing, and the noises of the buzzing night life outside, your body had acted on its own accord, and you soon found yourself kissing dice out of the blue. you sure were spontaneous today, huh. then again, it was a pleasant contrast to your usual run-of-the-mill life.

this was the second time today that you had managed to take dice by surprise, but honestly, it just kept getting better and better in his eyes. he was always a sucker for your kisses; they were always so ethereal after all. besides, dice loved spontaneity and the unexpected. it was always so surprising, whether good or bad, and the thrill of it all was what made it all worth it. while he wasn’t accustomed to that slow and steady lifestyle, it was something that he could very much get used to if it was with you. and this slow dance was the perfect example of that.

of course, dice instantly kissed back, and when the two of you separated, he went back in for more. there simply was nothing like kissing you underneath the moonlight while the two of you were slow dancing. the slow rhythmic beating of his heart and the tipsy sensation he was feeling as well as your close proximity were starting to grow on him. this scene was truly spectacular.

and so, the two of you continued to slow dance in the dark, only having the lights from the outside world illuminating your view. even if it started off as nothing more than another boring saturday night, it quickly turned into something quite fun and refreshing. perhaps you’d even try dancing with him again next week as well.

#asks #requests #hypmic #hypnosis mic #dice arisugawa #dice x reader #fluff #fic #gender neutral reader

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amemesiella · 4 years ago

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reading the tags/reblogs/replies to my last textpost was really fun to go through!! i wanted to reply to all of yous but i realized that the og post would get very,,,,, long,,,,, so here are my responses under the cut

YESSSSS his long playthroughs are SO good i’m pretty sure i watch them more than the more punchy shorter videos bc i like to listen to them while working + his chill voice in his earlier videos was one of the major reasons i even subscribed to him in the first place!!

ALSO !!! i’m glad rt’s celeste video encouraged you to complete most of the game!! even though it’s a high difficulty in terms of platforming i hope you enjoyed the journey along the way :]

THE WHO WELL DO YOU NOW RTGAME VIDEO WAS SO FUCKING FUNNY i actually hurt my stomach laughing jesus christ i still can’t get over the part where his audience literally raided the website and flooded it with rt shite

also the mario galaxy videos have such a special place in my heart i still go back to the first one to hear rt read rosalina’s storybook i just aaaaa,,, soft rt reading voice my beloved

THE STARDEW VALLRY VIDEOS!!!! oh my god those were quintessential controlled chaos videos and also the running memes were so funny ie. ‘go to bed’ and the fuckin cabins…..

irish lads playing don’t starve has got to be one of the greatest blessings on earth and also imo really solidified the irish lads dynamic, featuring dan as the mom friend and kevin as the resident arsonist

OOOOOO this is a really interesting list!! i feel like i don’t give enough attention to the videos of rt playing lesser known games but they’re insanely funny

some of my favorite moments that occured in some of these videos include:

- rt finding and reading all of the really weird achievements for deal or no deal

- rt putting the baby furniture close to a clifface

- rt playing wii tennis with the cooking mama baby

honestly??? that’s so fuckin valid

i didn’t even think the forza horizons videos would keep me engaged bc i don’t even like racing games aside from mario kart but it was those videos that taught me to never doubt rt’s comedic timing and humor bc those were hilarious

also i saw the blinking video live and while i genuinely was a little miffed when rt blinked against his own will the editing in the video later made it funny djfjsjdjks

NOT THE MINECRAFT STORY MODE VIDEOS DJSNDKSKDKSK

rt’s english degree pain was my absolute pleasure his ability to accurately predict what was happening was so fuckin wild AND THE PART WHERE RT RELOADED A SAVE TO KILL MAGNUS SENT ME LMAO

rt’s videos with kevin is SO fun i enjoy their dynamic of “the one who tries to finish the game” and “the one who is absolutely chaotic and in/directly impedes their progress along the way”

and the pheonix wright videos are really well edited and fun to rewatch!! people were really not kidding when the ace attorney games were just ‘gay lawyers’ JDBSJDNSJJF

SOBS THE CELESTE VIDEO IS ONE OF MY TOP COMFORT VIDEOS LARGELY BC ITS ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE GAMES TOO,,, i remember when i saw the twitch notification i fucking booked it to my laptop and ditched all my final exam materials KDNSKMDKSF i will never regret sitting through all 9 hours of that stream,,,,, and although i’m 100% sure we’ll never get a chapter 9 video i hope he completed it at least it’s one of my favorite chapters in the whole game

that mario party video is like gold in terms of humor i only wish that the pre-game stuff was saved bc it gave us gems such as:

- nogla going off about making an irish lads podcast (onlylads when?)

- nogla buying jack’s top of the morning coffee to prove a point

- just nogla in general

also terroriser’s appearance was just so funny his ongoing disdain for rt is so delightful

and if you haven’t i give u my full recommendation to watch the celeste video i may be biased but i’m never wrong (/j for that last bit LOL)

#rtgame #rtgamecrowd #memes talks #memes talks……. a fuckin lot #BUT RT LOVEPOSTING MAKES ME HAPPY OKAY #AND COMMUNITY RT LOVEPOSTING >>>>>>>#thank u guys sm for contributing!!!!!#again it was so fun to read ur responses i loved them all

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tricewithaz · 4 years ago

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THOTS ON SHADOW AND BONE

Hello everyone! it is I, Trice, and i come with my thoughts on the Shadow and Bone show cause ive got many

I'm gonna divide this in what i liked, what i disliked, and what i think could have been better but didn't really bother me. Feel free to send your opinions too!

As a whole, I really liked the show and I think it's a great adaptation that both fans and newcomers will enjoy. It's super well done! and every episode had me glued to the tv even though I knew what was going to happen.

Beware this is long

To start,

What i liked

Mal and Alina

I never really liked Mal in the books, mainly cause he had like, nothing going on for him, and not having his pov made him no favors whatsoever. Alina's perception of him was everychanging, two factors that didn't make him unlikeable necessarily, but that made me not want to read about him. In the show he's way more likeable and even though he still doesn't have a lot going on for him, you can see that he's always trying to protect alina, and you also see a bit of his demeanor through Archie's acting. I think he made a great job at portraying him. And Alina! Alina who in the books was essentially a y/n sort of character (although she did get better over time), her character, likes, dislikes, her DRIVE was incredibly portrayed in the show. Also Jessie (loml, marry me) and Archie have incredible chemistry together and they sold their yearning SO WELL (and so did the kid actors portraying them as children oh my GOD)...yall...i cried when they held hands. My favourite scene was definitely when Alina took care of Mal's wounds (a favorite trope of mine). And the HURT in their eyes whenever they thought the other was in danger....i saw the show dubbed but I'm sure their voices made it beyond incredible as well, their face acting was just on. point. Overall the show rEALLY makes me root for them both individually and together which is something the books didn't manage to do.

The Darkling

AAAAA i really enjoyed the Darkling omg, incredible charisma, Ben does such a great job (and so did his voice actor in Spanish oh my GOD). His acting was just as I imagined it in the books and i loved how he could be as sweet and mysterious as he could be menacing. In fact! i liked him more than i did in the book, and i think it was a great choice to make him more human. I'm not sure if this was Ben or the writing, but i could really see his yearning for an equal, for Alina, his loneliness and his thirst for power and control too. Great love interest, even greater villain. And his wardrobe was phenomenal. I also really liked how they implied that The Darkling was a name given by other people, it was very believable that people would call someone who literally controls shade something akin to "son of the dark" or something of the sort, instead of it being a name he gives himself or his job title (both if which are incredibly pathetic and cringy to think about).

Jesper

No comments. He was just great. I love Kit.

Nina

Omg Danielle did SUCH a great job at portraying Nina, it's exactly how i imagined her in Six of Crows.

Helnik

THE. YEARNING. THE. CHEMISTRY. I didn't love their scenes at the boat but once that was over I was practically screaming at the screen to jUST KISS ALREADY. Calahan and Daniell have such good chemistry together and the few changes they made only served the story better. I did wish they had development over more time cause Matthias' change of mind felt too quick, but i get why they had to rush. Because of how good their chemistry was, their fallout also was incredibly painful.

Inej's fear of the Menagerie and her morals

Amita's portrayal of Inej's hurt, devotion and her refusal to kill (and later hurt cause she has killed) is incredibly subtle but so SO effective. She's so talented really and truly sold Inej's feelings throughout the show.

VFX

Man.....the fold, the volcra, the grisha powers.....kudos to the animators and overall artistic team cause they were incredible. Also seeing the different title animations in each episode was such a tiny detail that made me so excited and they all looked so good.

Ketterdam

Again, kudos to the artistic team, everything about Ketterdam felt so alive (and weirdly moist), truly sold a kind of aesthetic and life that is so characteristic if the Barrel, even when i didn't imagine it that way in the books.

David

He appeared like, twice, and both times were so cute and charming I can't wait to see more of him both on his own and with Genya.

The Wardrobe

So, at first i hated the keftas. I thought the looked tacky and costume, but when you see them on screen they're just perfect (although i have to say the patterns on some of the keftas were kind of...cheap looking? and the training keftas were just kinda boring. My favourite was the Darkling's. Aside from that, i really liked Kaz's and inej's clothes too. Very distinctive and recognizable (although it was kind of weird seeing Inej in teal instead of purple lmao).

And the queen's dresses. Chefs kiss.

It's...so cheesy (affectionate)

The whole show felt like the kind of movies I would watch as a kid like Harry Potter and Pirates of the Caribbean. The writing was stylized enough to make it incredibly dramatic and overall there was just so much heart behind all of it. Definetely a show to watch again and again and feel all of it, cause that's what it being so cheesy managed, to make me actually feel for it. It feels like something to watch on a rainy afternoon after a bad day....it's great okay i really enjoyed it, even (specially) the most unbelievable parts of it. And here's the thing, it's something that i think a lot of newer tv and film have lost, so this is good.

What i didn't like

Zoya

Mostly cause of the writing. Originally, in the first book, i didn't like her, neither as a character (stereotypical mean girl with no other motivation than to bang the love interests....all three of them....what's new i still think it's an incredibly sexist trope) or a person (hey at least this was intentional), but over time i grew to LOVE her (mean girl turns out to have a good heart and actually respects the mc and decides to fight alongside her cause it's what's right, without necessarily liking her or giving up her character??? AND she has strong motivations??? now THAT'S new). In the show, i hoped they would keep her mean girl nature while foreshadowing her depth, but all they did was turn her into a petty seductress with barely any screentime, and that only makes her not even a bad antagonist but just a boring character to watch. Not only that but they took away a big part of her character that needed to be developed in the next books. I wanted to watch her rivalry with Alina, her unjustified venomous tongue too, I wanted to be entertained by her and I wasn't. This was also a problem cause when she finally changed teams, and when she hugged Alina, it was incredibly unsatisfying, it would have had a way stronger effect if we had seen her being Ruthless Zoya with a big ambition. I also didn't like how we were told that she didn't like alina, or that she had a family, instead of it being shown on screen. Just from the show, all i can tell you about her is that she likes to bang people and she has a good moral code i guess. Yall, I'm so petty about this.

Kaz

So, I didn't hate him, in fact i think I would have enjoyed him if I hadn't read the books first, cause the two things that bother me about him were two essential characteristics of him in the books. FIrstly, he seems so strained, instead of the seemingly laid back, almost chill looking (even though we know he's not chill at all) Kaz we see in the books, the Kaz that always knows something that you don't. Show Kaz doesn't seem to always be in control, to always have the last word, the last laugh. Instead he seems strained, all the damn time. And I think this is mainly a writing and directing issue. And he also seems weak, something Book Kaz would never do. This is also an issue cause because he doesn't have the same presence he has in the books, the times where he is weak, don't seem as effective. Sure, Pekka Rollins has essentially reduced him and humiliated him, but I haven't seen enough of Kaz being actually dangerous for this to be shocking and for Pekka to seem even more hateable (and, i really liked Pekka, loved him as an antagonist more than i did in the books). Idk, Kaz was so charismatic and just fun and engaging to read in the books that his portrayal in the show felt lacking.

Alina's power's VFX

The little suns were cute and all but the light coming from within her was just ugly I'm sorry.

SFX

A lot of the sound design was just too stylized for the tone of the show i think. I particularly remember the sound of Mal's punches....what's that about.

What i think could have been better, but didn't particularly dislike

The Crows' storyline

And i think part of this is a consequence of Kaz not being as witty as he was in the books. Where's the incredibly complicated heist moves? the even more unbelievable C and D plans when something goes wrong? I didn't like that them getting Alina was essentially just luck, cause i didn't see enough of them being smart and quick on their feet. I also think it was unnecessary to have their storyline mixed with Alina's, i would have enjoyed watching a different heist, maybe in Ravka as well, and them incidentally crossing paths with Alina, more than i liked this storyline. ironically enough, the heist was the part i was least interested in

Genya and Alina

I just feel like her relationship with Alina wasn't strong enough, and i think it's because the show tried to make us believe they were much closer than they were without spending the necessary time in them.

Overall, I really really enjoyed the show, i will be watching it again (particularly cause i want to watch it in English) and i cannot wait for the second season omg (although i have to say, I'm scared for Nikolai)

I think that's all! I would also love to read yall's opinions and have a conversation.

#Shadow and Bone #Shadow and Bone spoilers #sab #sab spoilers #grishaverse #the grisha trilogy #six of crows #malina #helnik #shadow and bone series #sab review

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cosmiclatte28 · 4 years ago

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Highway to Heaven (Taeyong x you)

Another short one shot.

You and Taeyong! Bringing back Highway to Heaven coz that song is my all time fave!

Enjoy!

"The number you are calling is not active, please try again." A cheery-apologetic tone greets me again. Yes again.

I sigh realizing there's no more reason to try and redial his number. Of course the same answer will be given. A dozen of apologies, sweet nothings, and another false promises of "make it up to you."

I toss my phone to the couch along with myself, turn the TV on and decided to at least cheer myself up. I glance at my wrist and note the time shown on my watch : 07.00 pm. We were supposed to be together; I don't know probably eating our main course while laughing and reminiscing the journey of our love story which just turns 2 years today. However, since 05.00 pm I've been dressed up nicely, waiting patiently for my busy boyfriend to at least ring me up and tell me to get ready as he is on his way. But no. Nothing happens according to the plan. We agreed this morning through a call that he will leave to pick me at 05.00pm and we will head to the restaurant he reserved.

I tap my heels on the ground, and try to think rationally. Maybe his battery died and the road is crowded. Yeah that must be the reason. I mean.. he won't forgot this right? It's our special night and I can understand we were both busy in the morning, that's also the reason we decided to spend our special night together, I left work earlier today just to be ready.. but here I am still waiting over my missing boyfriend.

I reach my phone and type a short message to another person; hoping that he knows the latest news update about my date.

Soon after he reads my text message, he calls me.

"Hey, sorry if I disturb your night.. but.. are you still practicing?" I ask a bit worried.

The man over the line sounds out of breath as he answers my question. "No you're not disturbing. Yeah our practice got hold up. And I'm not sure if we are ending soon. Why?"

"ah.." I noted to myself. Then he must be busy, that's why he doesn't pick up my calls nor answer my texts.

"Is something wrong? Do you need any help?"

"Oh it's nothing. Okay thank you for the news, Jae. Have you guys eaten dinner?" I worry about their health. It is almost past dinner time, and I'm also starving.

"We just ate gimbab. Do you want to speak to Taeyong? I guess you called me because he did not pick up his calls.. am I right?" Jaehyun playfully questions me.

Well before knowing Taeyong, Jaehyun is my best friend and since his debut with NCT, I am introduced by him as his best-est friend. Saying that his motivator is me, and he can debut because I supported him. From that moment I look around and introduce myself, there are sparks flying when I saw Taeyong's sincere smile. And because of that, I decided to find a job which allows me to have more time with them (especially their leader). That resulted in me being their stylist. I work with 2 other stylist, but I am the head of the group.

Back to the call.

"I can understand. Tae is busy right? Just please tell him not to overwork himself. And please tell him to update me if he'll be coming tonight. That's all. I'll probably come with some foods in 40 minutes." I speak as I gather my things up and reach for my coat.

It's starting to get cold, and despite the disappointment, rage, and sadness in my heart, Iput it aside first to support Tae and the boys. I mean it's not his fault. Their comeback is near and I knew since day 1 that His idol career comes first. I begged him to do that, for the sake of both of our well being.

"Great! My break is over. I need to end the call. Be safe darl!" Jaehyun sends a kiss over the call and I smiled.

I grab my keys and lock my apartment door. Driving to the nearest Chinese take-out restaurants, I ordered ten portions of jajangmyeon and three tangsuyuk. Then my car accelerates to their prison. Oops I mean their studio.

I come on time. While taking the lift, I happen to walk-over their dance teacher and he told me NCT is done for tonight. I bow to him and rush to get to their door. It's almost 08.00 pm and I'm also starving.

The door opens and everyone's eyes looked up to the plastic bag in my hands.

"OUR ANGEL IS HERE! GOSH! We almost starve to death! The devil here is starving us!" Haechan screams and runs to help me carry the heavy bags. Though I'm pretty sure he did it not out of gentleness but because he is starving.

Taeyong seems surprised to see me walking into the studio with dinner and a nice outfit. Yeah I have no time to change, actually it's just a plain black dress hugging me nicely, and Taeyong is always hungry for me in a simple fitting attire. I wear the coat he gave me, a long outer coat which he nicely decorated for me. Seeing me in that special outfit, he seems to remember something. It's irregular for me to show up this proper, usually I grab a comfortable sweatshirt and sweatpants, because sometimes I want to dance along and skirts are just forbidding me to break dance. I see him face-palms himself and messes his hair. A sign whenever he's contemplating with himself.

I broke our eye contact and a part of my heart feels bad for him, he must be working so hard yet he is still trying to make time for me.. that makes me feel bad for urging him to bring me for a date tonight. Another part feels more relieved that Tae does not entirely forget his promise... but still the tiniest bit of my heart aches as I realize another special day is coming to an end with failed plans.

"Tae, how are you sweetie?" I walk to him and stand on my toes to cup his face.

He leans closer to me and after giving me a peck on my lips, he whispers "I'm sorry.. I'll make it up to you.. I swear you look beautiful."

"Shh. Keep it for tonight. Let's eat first I'm starving." I grin and pull him to join the others. He forces a smile at first, but upon eating together with me and the others his smile changes.

Thanks to Haechan and Doyoung bickering over pouring the sauce or dipping the tangsuyuk, we all had a happy dinner.

I finish my plate and reach to help Taeyong since he looks super tired.

"Aaaaa" I raise the chopstick to his mouth and grab the whole group's attention.

Taeyong plays along and happily lets me feed him. The other members are comfortable enough with the two of us dating and being cheesy, they even help us do anything we did not think at first.

"Ah I'm jealous. I also want someone to feed me." Winwin pouts while stirring his bowl.

"Let me," Yuta excitedly grabs Winwin's bowl and the whole group laughs.

Dinner ended nicely, we put the trashes into the plastic bag and throw it away.

"So.. are we staying or go back?" Mark questions the team after a good one hour break.

"I think we can call it a night." Jaehyun rushes and looks over to Taeil and Johnny: sending a signal.

"Right! We've done well, and I think a good rest is also important for our health." Taeil, as the oldest, states.

I lookat Jaehyun with questionable face but he just throws me his dimple smile. I knew it.. he must've caught on what's happening between me and Tae.

Yes, Jaehyun is a quick man. He saw my attire, he saw how Taeyong acts like he feels bad about something and when he asks Johnny and Taeil does it make sense if their leader is forgetting a special day.. or unable to fulfil a special day promise... the two agree and so they plan to let Taeyong has his night.

"Okay, let's divide the cars. Yuta, Winwin, mark and Haechan you go together. Then we'll take the other car." Johnny stands up and gathers his belongings.

The others cheer and scatter across the studio, cleaning up their mess and picking up their coats. The younger ones leave first and Taeyong with his puzzled face asks the remaining 4

"What is that? I haven't spoken a word and they're gone?" Taeyong picks up his phone and pockets it.

"It's okay Tae, we know.. Anyways.. Happy anniversary for the two of you!" Doyoung pats Taeyong's shoulder, smiles to me and walks to exit the door.

"We will bring the other members home, so you can have your time." Johnny winks and exits.

Before Taeyong could open his mouth, Jaehyun shuts him up "Be gentle okay! My best friend here is fragile!" Jaehyun laughs and leave too.

"All the best for you two! No worries Tae, the dorm is under my control. Enjoy the night!" Taeil waves and closes the door.

Taeyong's face flushed red and he hides his face behind his hands. I laugh at his cuteness and hug his left hand.

"So.. they are giving you for me tonight! It's nice of them. Shall we go?" I sound happy and excited. Like I forgot what he made me do... waiting for him for a good 2 hours.

"Gosh.. yeah they're unpredictable. Anyways.. as I said.. I'll make it up to you. Now.. where to?" he grabs his coat and then turns off the lights.

He takes over my car and drives to my apartment. The whole ride is full with rambles of apologies and cries of frustration from Taeyong.

"My phone died.. I didn't get any of your calls.. and the dance teacher did not let us have breaks.. I'm super sorry you have to reach Jaehyun to ask for my update.. gosh it looks like Jaehyun is a better man than me."

I quickly deny him, "hey! What are you talking about. You are my man.. I'm dating you not him.. and I can understand your reason for not picking me up. Don't blame yourself Tae. Look, I've forgiven you.. and let's promise each other to not discuss about this at all. Tonight we'll spend it well and forget everything else behind. Just for-" I glance at my watch "- for 3 hours, we'll spend them nicely okay."

Taeyong lets a tear fall and I tease him for being a softie, which successfully brings a smile on his face.

That night, he compliments me for wearing his favorite dress, but then things are more interesting after we finish half bottle of our wine and truths are spilled here and there. As the night deepens, so did our kiss. He ends up undressing me from his so-called favorite dress and goes way wilder than what Jaehyun advised.

The intense rock on my bed leaves the two of us gaping and smiling as we reach for one another's warmth. The heater does not need to work tonight, and after-glows with Taeyong are always wonderful.

I run my fingers over his hair which wetly sticks to his godly face. Tracing my digits over his sharp jawline and bringing his hair back. I clean the strands of hair covering his face and lean in closer to my favorite part of his face.

It was not his dreamy eyes, cute nose, or sexy lips.. Taeyong closes his eyes as I inch closer to put a kiss on his scar. The scar he had when he was a child, the scar he used to hide , but I made him love that and be proud of it.

Yes, I always kiss his scar softly and mumbles out how his beauty never decreased. How his scars are beautiful too and that really helps Taeyong boosts his confidence..

He embraces me deeper, planting marks over my necks claiming me as his, trailing down my collar bone and leaving butterfly kisses down my left arm. He reaches to hold my left arm and plants a not too short not too long kiss over my pulse on my left hand. It was not pretty. There are traces and marks of dirty lines, deep cuts were once there. Cutting had once been my drug and Jaehyun helped me get through it a lot. If I can treasure Taeyong's flaw.. so can he.

He rubs the fading scars gently and as we lock eyes one more time, our bodies involuntarily move again and the night is long.

We climbed up and down our ecstasy, letting all of our feelings go out. Sweet was there, anger raged there, tears were flowing out of our eyes, we let out all of our emotions out and cleans the mess up with a sweet round. We always bring our emotions to bed and to finish them, a round full of praises and love will drives the two of us to dream land and be the reason our chain link strengthen.

It isnever easy watching Taeyong beside pretty and perfect "Barbie dolls". He too did not find it easy whenever someone flirts with me when I did their hair and clothes. Working for a model company and as a model itself, sometimes make Taeyong's blood boils.

The bed becomes our war zone and paradise. Thanks to this activity we always did whenever we felt we've kept too much.. we can go stronger each day.

"I love you Tae, don't be sorry alone. I am also sorry for not considering your tight schedule." I reach out for his hand after we descended our high together.

"You're a true understanding angel. It's not wrong the guys call you angel. And I am your Mr. Demon, but I'm really sorry you always end up like this."Taeyong smirks.

"Yeah. Anyways, we can't live without one another. And I always enjoys ending up at the bed like this with you. This is a real pain and pleasure experience. I got to say other couples have to try this." I trace abstract lines over his chest.

He giggles a bit from the feeling and returns my action by drawing circles on my sweaty back "What? Try to get half drunk and rock their bed while releasing each other's stress? And then wrapping up with a sweet round? I guess we might as well make a video out of it and be the nice example." Taeyong chuckles and pulls me closer to him. His legs intertwine mine and I punch him for his ideas.

"You want other people seeing my body? Gosh! You don't even let me take the offers for an underwear photo shoot." I rise my eyebrow judging.

He bites his lips and drags his hand lower to my back.

"That's because many men will use you to get off. And I don't like that. Gosh... don't you know how hard was it for me to control myself when you show up in that black dress earlier only with my outer coat. Don't you see the fire In their eyes." Taeyong pouts upon mentioning this.

"And earlier you said you want to make a cam about our activity. I'm confused.. so do you actually want to share me or not." I laugh and Taeyong quickly shuts me with a kiss.

"Never. I was kidding. You're mine and only mine to see touch and feel. You're my precious." He clings into me like a koala to a tree.

I rub his hair and bury my face over his crook of shoulder. Inhaling his scent, I found my peace back. All of my anger and disappointment is gone as we did one round full of rage earlier.. and now I found my peace back as my eyelids grew heavier.

"Sleep tight my cherry-bomb. Happy 2 years anniversary." Taeyong fixes the blanket over us and we both sleep well.

The sun shyly peeks from my window shades and after much tossing and turning, we cannot find a position where the sun ray did not burn our eyes. We failed. So we wake up... have our nice bath together.. Another quick round and finally sit for breakfast. It's Sunday and Taeyong has his free day. We ignore our phone since last night and just enjoy catching up with one another over a warm glass of coffee and smooth pancakes. Taeyong sits on his stool and his hand reaches for a new magazine lying in the table. Gosh I forgot to keep my latest magazine. I pray Taeyong did not notice anything.. or did not even open the pages. But he did. I mean there's no reason he did not check a fashion book. He's always following trends and modes.

True enough I hear him turning the pages and stops on one image. I waitor his reaction and voila!

"What is this photo shoot for?" He always asks the same question: whenever he saw a picture of me and a male model.

"Umm.. the dress of course." I answer him, still not facing him

"This?" he points at the photo.. I turn around and see my latest photo shoot. Woah it's nice though.

"A wedding photo shoot Tae.. you never forbid me in taking one right?" I flip the last pancake and transfer it to the plate with arranged fruits.

"Yeah yeah... I want to do that too!" he pouts as he flip the next pages and found more.

"You did this many!" he shakes his head

"Well, you can ask your manager..and maybe get one for yourself."

"No! I mean the real one... not with a model.. not for a magazine. Us.. our wedding picture." He smirks and I freeze in my place with face as red as a brick.

He closes the book, pushes it aside and grabs his fork to start digging in.

"I'm looking up for more breakfast like this with you. Remember that, my goal is a wedding picture with you. Now, good morning my cherry-bomb. Thanks for last night." He speaks as he puts in a mouthful of the pancake and berries.

"Stop making me blush. It's still too early." I lose my cool.

"It's ten.. quite not early. But I'm in for more Sundays like this." Taeyong winks and I have to look elsewhere to make my heart beat slower.

The morning continues with more cheesy lines and soft side of Taeyong shown. I got to admit this is why I fall in love with him every day. There seems to be more and more things that I found out about him and his charms.

"To the man I love now and forever, Lee Taeyong, cheers" I bring my coffee cup to bump his.

"To the woman I love now til forever meets a long time! Wait for me to make us a home." He bumps the mug and we drink our bitter sweet coffee.

It's afternoon and I am working on the modification of NCT's comeback clothes when my phone buzzed. Taeyong is busy across me gluing patches to the jackets.

I reach for my phone and see a pop up message from Jaehyun

"Did he go bomb or cherry? ;;) "

I bite my lips as I quickly reply

"He went highway to Heaven."

"Aw man I lose."

"What? What did you bet now.."

"Johnny said it will be Bomb.. I said Cherry.. and Doyoung won. Gosh how unlucky are we."

"Well congrats to my rabbit prince. What are you losing Jae?"

"House chores for the whole week. Okay enjoy your time."

"who's that?" Taeyong has been waiting for me to drop my phone. He looks curious and a bit annoyed. We agreed to not use the phone at all until Monday..

"Sorry.. it's Jaehyun"

"and.. what did he say?" Taeyong sounds cool. He knew Jaehyun and me are only friends. And he trusts Jaehyun with all his heart: he even wished he was his brother.

"He asked if yesterday was Cherry or Bomb.." I reply while fixing my eyes on the jacket in front of me. It's Winwin's costume and I need to decorate his.

"uh-huh.. and.." Taeyong bites his lips. He's also curious what I think about last night.

"Highway to Heaven Tae," I wink at him and he hypes up. He acts like he win a Nobel prize and suddenly returns to his cool image.

"that's hot. Accurate. Now we should stop flirting if we want to finish the jackets and have another round. Tell me how you would like it." He bites his lips and shoots me his hand.

"Stop it Tae! I can't concentrate." I close my eyes and take several deep breathes.

"Arraseo.. just tell me okay." He winks and then focuses on his work.. while secretly giggling at how I am super red right now.

"Ah yeah, I love you darling!" he blows me a kiss and acts back to his thinking mode.

He is modifying his own jacket and I'm pretty sure he wants it to be perfect. So I let him stay silent while I finish the rest too.

'We'll take the Highway to Heaven!"

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lycheesodas · 4 years ago

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Different anon but I'm interested in that list 👀

aaaaa ok!! here we go

from the / tag:

Beneath a Young Sun and in the Eagle's Shadow by Strigimorphaes, G, 5.2k words

Beleg has been away for some time, guarding the border, killing orcs and generally living the rough life. Meanwhile, Mablung has been staying at Doriath's court. Once reunited, they are sent away to the Mereth Aderthad, but despite being headed for a joyful feast, Beleg still sees danger everywhere. Mablung tries to convince him that for once, there is some hope for this strange, changed world - and a chance for a peaceful moment or two in the wilderness.

We’re starting off with my favourite!! The entire atmosphere here is just so dreamy, so whimsical.. I love it. Pretty serious but also fluffy! And optimistic ; w ;

Hurry with the swift current by LiveOakWithMoss, T, 1k words

Beleg is foolish, Mablung is furious, both are wet.

Short! Cute! Really funny aljsdfk this is so,, in character for them imo. The last line always fckin HITS

The Black Sword by elfscribe for tehta, M, 12.4k words

Mablung sees a strange portent that causes him to fear that his beloved friend Beleg's affection for Túrin, the self-exiled young warrior, could bring grief to them all.

One of two (2) fics on this list with a rating higher than T. Missing scene, canon-compliant so.. a lot of angst. I normally don’t read first person POV but this is really quite good! It’s one of the longer fics that take on their last parting ; ~ ; and I think the author did an excellent job of exploring their feelings and how they each came to their decision on what to do. Also, just putting it out there, the M rating is for a short smut scene in mid chapter 2.

(Uhh there was another one but I think the author has it set on private now 😭)

Moving on to the & tag!! Because friendship fics also slap

All The King's Horses by Nauthril, M, 44.3k words

Beleg felt, more than saw the projectile that struck with a sickening thuck sound into the larger part of his thigh. Someone cried out in pain and surprise, and he vaguely realized it may have been him.

The Elf went to yank the dart from his leg, only to find that it was barbed, designed to let its venom overwhelm the victim before it could be quickly removed. The more subtle effects of the spike were nearly immediate, effecting his fine motor skills.

His right thigh burned fiercely with every pulse of his heart.

Fighting the urge to keep his own two feet from tangling with his steps, the Beleg made every effort to at least stand upright.

Or:

Beleg fails to return to Menegroth for Túrin’s birthday celebration. Mablung and Túrin set out to find him and bring him home.

A LONG FIC.. A LONG, CHAPTERED FIC!!!!! I felt like I won the lottery when I saw this hrhfsldfjk It’s an action adventure with multiple POV’s and it’s just really freakin good ok, I am absolutely living for that resolution in chapter 7. The relationship between all three main characters are handled really well! I think it’s gonna be part of a series too so HYPE!!! I wish there was like a follow or subscribe button on ao3 so I’ll know when the author would upload next ; 0 ; (EDIT: THERE IS ONE BUT I JUST NEVER FUCKING SAW IT LMFAO) Also, mind the warning tags here! Slight spoiler: it was an original side character so it wasn’t very front and centre but it could still bother some people

A Quiet Moment by Nauthril, G, 1.6k words

A Yuletide fic for the season. Beleg returns from the Northern Marches and shares some quiet moments with Mablung.

I know tis not the season but it’s so cute.. And honestly it’s immersive enough to make you feel like it’s actually Christmas! The banter, the gift exchange, the way they’re so comfortable with each other ; w ; This warms my heart <3

Parting by @glowingmechanicalheart right here on tumbler dot com

It’s literally six sentences but they’re such efficient sentences. It’s so clear and so sad because we know what happened in the end ; ~ ; it’s really what I was trying to convey with this piece!

The next two are by the same author on AO3!

Battle Worn But Going Home by GlowingMechanicalHeart, T, 1k words

The battle rages, hard and brutal. And it’s going to end badly, Mablung can tell already. Something feels off, like Belegûr is holding back, mocking their armies and their dead. Beleg stands side to side with him, and that is a comforting thought for him.

And then it happens, a betrayal from their own side and the battle grows worse.

Everything about the Fifth Battle is just pain...... I always wondered how those two handled it, though :0 And this fic gives us a glimpse of that. I really like how this author handles Mablung’s POV!

Mourning a Friend by GlowingMechanicalHeart, T, ~700 words

Mablung does his best to not to worry, if anyone can take care of himself, it’s Beleg. But his thoughts and emotions betray him, his whole being is screaming at him that Beleg is in danger, to run forth, find his friend and bring him to the safety of Doriath.

THIS FIC. I’M- I HAVE NO WORDS JUST READ IT 😭 Incredibly sad but well-written take on how Mablung finds out about Beleg’s death. Absolutely heartbreaking, I love it.

Now for some stuff outside the relationship tags because I'm literally that desperate.

Within a Dark Wood by Marchwriter, T, 7.7k words

"The tale of Túrin is known to many of this company… but…tonight is not the night to tell it. So I will tell you another tale. One that, perhaps, not even the eldest amongst our little company has yet heard." So the storyteller began…

Story within a story, which is always cool imo! Follows Beleg and Mablung from their first meeting to their last parting and a little bit after Beleg’s death ; w ; THE YEARNING..... it’s palpable. This one really tugs at my heartstrings because it made me think of what could have been (within the scope of the fic) if they’d just been honest with their feelings

The Two Hunters by theeventualwinner for Lunarium, G, 1.3k words, no summary ;;

Cute friendship fic!! Somehow full of hope in a time when the dark forces are growing. I like how it captures the difference in their personalities and approach towards life(?) but how they’re still close friends

And that’s basically my full reading list of my favourite marchwardens! They’re such an underrated pair (as best friends?? boyfriends? either way they’re soulmates 😤) that there’s not a lot of fics about them. I do my best with creating my own content but I’m more of an artist than a writer XD But they’re really starting to force my hand here.

I hope you guys enjoy my recs! Also, thanks anon and previous anon for reminding me to log back in to my AO3 account so I can leave a proper review soon 💀

#Anonymous #answered #tolkien #silmarillion #beleg #mablung #lychee's fic recs #as you can see it's literally only 3 in the actual ship tag #i spent almost two hours putting this together it's so late now omfg #i am going to SLEEP

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berri-hopefulspouse · 4 years ago

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for whatever you want! 📌 💕 💔 🏳‍🌈 🍀 (I tried very hard to limit myself...)

Genshin Impact time it is then 👀👀 Under readmore tho cuz this is LONG ndfjsjdjsjdd

📌 how did you find your hyperfixation?

I heard of it initially around the launch date of the game, however I remember that I wasn't very interested at first due to the gacha aspect of Genshin. Mostly just because, usually, gacha games don't appeal to me too much. However, when you and a few streamers I watched started getting into it, I started to get a bit curious. Then, one night while bored, I watched one of them stream the game. And I saw just how beautiful the art style and graphics were...and I knew I had to at least give it a try.

💕 tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them!

Why must you make me pick one- /j

I feel like I've rambled about Aether & Venti enough to you about why they're my favorites, so let's do Albedo!

Albedo is just??? Literally such a sweet bean. He struggles with loneliness, and isolation, likely due to both his dedication to his studies and his general "colder" scientific disposition. He struggles with the inner apathy in him, that wants to destroy everything in the name of alchemy, and yet he wants so badly to be good. He wants so badly for someone to just save him. And I want to save him from that, even if it means just spending a little time each day making sure he feels seen and loved like he deserves. Not seen just as a great alchemist, or a teacher, or even an artist- but seen as a person. A person with their own struggles, issues, and feelings.

Story quirks and personality aside, he's also just??? So fucking pretty???? Im not even usually into blondes but this game really do be hitting different for me. I just wanna tousle his hair and braid it and see what it would look like if he had his hair down. Plus!!! His eyes!!! Are so soft!!! So focused!!! On everything he does!!! He just seems like someone who could be so graceful and delicate with everything he does, but due to his occupation, he's simply calculated and careful.

Not to mention Klee???? Klee!!!! Big brother Albedo taking care of his baby sister!!!! I just sjcndhxjsjchd aAAAA why am I such a softie for people who are just So Good with kids.

💔 tell us about one of your LEAST favorite characters and why you dislike them.

Okay, I won't lie, the characters I actively dislike are few and far between- but I do have a couple. Most for petty reasons, so I'll talk about someone with an actual justified reason.

ALBERT. MY GUY. YOU FUCKING BASTARD. LEAVE BARBRA ALONE!!! Stop trying to be the r/niceguy for the love of god the secondhand embarrassment ALONE is enough to make me hate you, let alone the fact that because of the recent event you made her CRY?! AND THINK THE WORST??? LIKE! I will LITERALLY send you into Cider lake, do not FUCKING TEST ME! I hope karma brings you fucking justice soon. Like! I know obsessive. But I at least don't fucking stalk people and basically threaten that "the most precious thing to you" is stolen! MDXJSJDAAAAUGH!

This mans frustrates me so INEXPLICABLY MUCH. I will YEET HIM.

🏳‍🌈 do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?

I always have some headcanons,,,

Aether goes by he/they pronouns, but doesn't exactly put a label on it.

Albedo is ND as fuck. Whether it be ADD or somewhere on the autism spectrum I don't know quite yet, but he's on there somewhere.

Venti has little nose freckles... and a few on his knees from the sun.

Aether is demisexual as hell, while Albedo is just gay as fuck.

(More confirmed but still putting it here anyway) Venti being okay with any pronouns! He don't really care!!!

Barbra being the one to give Ren confidence in their gender & sexuality, just like they did for her 🥰

[Citrus TM Minors Beware]

Aether is a switch, but prefers soft dom, while Albedo is usually a dom. Whether soft or hard really do depend on the level of Brat Ren is showing that day.

Aeth probably has a hair pulling thing. And Albedo probably loves overstim.

Neither of them expect the hell-list Ren has in terms of what they're into.

🍀 do you have any kins or comfort characters from your hyperfixation?

I have some of both!

Comfort charas: Albedo, Aether, Venti, Barbra, and Ganyu

Kins: Sucrose, probably Bennett.

Bonus! Gender Envious: Xiao, Venti, Albedo, Venti, Ganyu, Venti, Diluc, V e n t i-

Thank for the ask Creame! 🥺

#[ ren rambles ]#[ stormy winds ]#[ creative pining ]#[ bardic duo ]#[ Hydro Squad ]#Tagging the platonic beans as well 🥰#citrus tw//#I was gonna do this tomorrow but brain went brrrr

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livcosmos · 4 years ago

Text

CHAIN OF GOLD booktalk

You guys I can't even... that was oh my God soooo good. I know I always say this but I don’t even know where to start like there was so much going on and ahahahha I loved it so incredebly much!!! I wasn’t sure if I wanted to read it because I thought that it would be to painful because of my love Jem but I am sooooo incredebly glad I did read it and I can’t wait for the next book I am fraking out so hard I need to know what happens kjkjkjkjk... Can it please be March already???Please!!! I had so much fun reading it, it gave all the feelings from laughing out loud to screaming and crying and wanting to throw the book out the window, it was amazing! It was so intense!! I also want to say how much respect I have for this woman she created such an amazing world with such amazing characters and she never stops to amaze me she never disappoints! I want to thank her once again for everything!!! She is a freaking genius!!! Now let’s get started!

Ok I think I’m going to start with my boy Matthew, he was and is my aboulute favourite, I knew he was going to be from the moment I read the short story about him in “Ghosts of the Shadow Market”, cause yes apperently I have a weakness for sad damaged boys, my hearth breaks for him and I just want him to be happy more than everything he is such a sweeatherat and I am so so scared that something is going to happen to him I saw some theires about him... I’m telling you if something happpens to him I burning the world down if I may quote Sebastian!

Through the whole book I was screaming for more parts from his point of few because I needed and I stilll need to know exactly what he is thinking and what he is feeling I need that so bad and when we finally got the first tiny part from his point of few the one with Grace... I am going to talk about that...girl in a miunte... first I started crying cause I was so happy but than of course that bitch, I’m sorry I normaly never swar but oh my Lord I hate Grace and the things I said to her God forgive me, had to ruin it and hhjhfjfgfgf poor Matthew! I really hope Magnus helps him, our sweet Maguns our mother Theresa bless his soul I love how he is always there to help and all my hope is in him that he helps Matthew too as he helped Will, I am so happy he is present and in the action, let’s be honest what would be a Shadowhunter book without him seriosly now?

As I mentioned Will, first his parenting omg is helarious😂😂 I love him so much! And second of all Matthew remeinds me so much of him and I really really hope Matthew finds his light as Will did!

Matthew needs to talk to someone about what happend he needs to talk about it and frogive himself for what he did ahhh it breaks my hearth to see him suffering! When he told Thomas and Lucie about what Alastair said as mean as it sounds cause I do felt really sorry for Alastair in that moment, I was glad Matthew said at least a part of what is so heavy on his hearth, I mean he didn’t said what he did because of the rumor Alaister speed but it was a step forward in my opinion! AAAHHH and I read the things we can expect in Chain of Iron and that he probably is going to tell Cordelia what he did aaahhhh... bless him I am so excited to see what happens!!!!

Heres is the thing, this is probably an rather unpopular opinion but even tho I of course ship James and Cordelia, I mean obviosly they are made for each other there is no doubt in that, but there is still a part of me that ships Matthew with Cordelia.... I mean THE DRAMA, I know but ahhh and I read that they are going to be very close in Chain of Iron and aaaaaa I can’t say it often enough how freaking excited I am for that book!!!!! I loved the easiness in their conversations, they always were somehow comfortable around each other and the dance at the ball tho omg that was something, I loved it so much!! How they danced together and talked that was the moment I started shipping them!!!

And here’s another thing, I also shipped Matthew with Lucie like... hgckgfgfk don’t get me wrong I love Jesse and I do ship Jesse with Lucie, like how could I not and bless him when he gave his last breath for James how couldn’t I love him? I cried so much reading that scene! How could I not ship him with Lucie they are also made for each other but than agian Matthew and Lucie ... that would be interesting I mean now it’s obviosly never going to happen because Matthew is over her but still! And my hearth BROKE like it litterly shattered when James talked to Lucie about Matthew and she was like yeah but I don’t like him in that way... Like girl I love you you’re amaizing but what is wrong with you? We are talking about MATTHEW FREAKING FARICHILD here !!!!! Oh or at that part where she was talking to Matthew and she literatly called him a drunk, like yeah he do has that problem but she didn’t had to be so harsh! I loved tho how much Matthew cared for Lucie how he was concerned about her well being he is so sweet!!!! But I guess have a more brother and sister relationship, unfortunately.

The only thing I fear is that Matthew is goin to end up alone because obviosly James and Cordelia and Lucie and Jesse will stay togetehr forever, and I don’t want my baby to be alone forever! I read that there is a new charachter in Chain of Iron, a girl from Italy maybe she will be the perfect match for my Matthew? Who knows?

Another thing I ablolutely fraking love about Matthew is also that he loves fashion and that he carse about how he dressed and oh my lord he is wering RINGS!!!! like ok every Shadowhunter has their family ring but he is wearing other rings too and he has so much style!!!! He owend my hearth anyway but those things made him even more lovebale for me ahhhhhh and the fact that he is fangirling over Magnus.... omg!!! And of couse the fact that he loves reading I mean yeah Jamie and Lucie they also love reading and I love them for that too but the fact that he is reading in combination whit his other traids... he went right up on the second place of my book boyfriedns list!!! And of couse his dog, I love Oscar even tho he didn’t apear that much but aaaaa how he tried to save Matthew when they were attaced ...my hearth. And the fact itself that he named his dog after his favourite author.... just... I always love an artist boy but Matthew is something else! He can’t quite reach Jem because Jem to me is more that everything but he is right behid him! Jem is the love of my life and Matthew is my soulmate how about that,that seams sounds good.😂😂

As I already mentioned my biggest love of all times Jem, I also have to say a few words about him! So I cryed so much at that part when he came to see Will after his parents died, I was so emotional and ahhhhh every time they all were like oncle Jem here onlce Jem there... I had tears in my eyes I always cry for Jem and and he owns my hearth forever and ever, his faith always makes me cry, how sad he must have been all this years... how sad... finally seeing him happy with Tessa and Mina makes me more than happy and again I am warning everyone here if anything happens to him in the Wicked Powers anything... to him or Mina... I’m going to react even worse than if anything happens to Matthew!!! Oh and another thing I can hadle “oncle Jem”, it hurts but I except it, “cousin Jem” tho is a whole other level tho.. that I can’t handle it’s so wired omg it’s so wired that Cordelia is Jem’s cousin ....and overall it is wired to see all of them as parents not only Will and Tessa but also Cecily and Gabriel, Sophie and Gideon ahhhh my hearth, knowing everything they have been through and now seeing them have kids...but than it was also so interesting and funny and I loved that they were there but that they let the children do their own thing, that even tho they were present they weren’t the focus of the book. AH and I loved how Magnus was like: “I am going to help you all but if something goes wrong I am going to tell your parents!”, I love that he is so close to Tessa and Will everytime I think about the fact that he and Tessa are so close to this day ahhhhh....so sweet!!!

And now that I mentioned Mina I have to say this too, I how painfull must it be for Tessa and Jem and even Maguns to have seen all those beautiful children James, Lucie, Matthew all of the live, and love and grow and than die! Like it hurts me so much because I learnd to love them all so much and I am sitting here screaming at every on of them to stay alive and don’t die but than if you thing about it they are all already dead.... and that hurts and if that hurts me how must Tessa and Jem feel, who have seen them every day.... that is so incredebly sad and it breaks my heart! And than I think about the fact that Jem is now also going to die ant some point and Mina too and I can’t even think about it that is unbareble for me I don’t want to think about a world without my Jemmy in it!!

Anyway coming back to this book I think it’s time to talk about our manipulative, annoying, mean, evil, I fraking hate her so much, Grace Blackthorn.... aaahhhhh were do I start......I KNEW IT from the very beginning!!!!!! The moment, the moment James metioned that damned bracelet the first time I knew that there was something wired about it, I knew it had some kind of influence over him I knew it and than she came andjbsdhbfsdhfbsdhf I can’t even I am sooooo mad soooo sooooo mad!!!! I love Jamie, I realy do and I know it’s not his fault but still I am also a little mad at him that he let himself get triecked by that lunatic!!!!! I was so happy and releaved when she took that bracelet back from him I was so happy that she was finally out of the picture and I also was sooooooooo happy he realised even a little bit that there was something wrong and that he didn’t actualy loved Grace and that he actually has feelings for Cordelia!!!! Because my god Cordelia was there first he liked Cordelia first when she read to him when he was ill, that was so sweet and he had a crush on her but didn’t realise it and than the lunatic came and gave him that freaking bracelet, and she said herslf that James was obviosly crushing over Cordelia but of cousre she is a manipulative bitch and she made him take that bracelet and than made him wear it ahhhhh bsdgfkjhgfkhgljkg

It was a trap from the very beginning and I had red flags all over in my head flying around the moment she first apeared, of couse I felt sorry for her, because of the other lunatic, her mother, and I thought that it’s not her fault that she was raised by Tatiana and that she maybe has a little good in her but noooooooooooo she knows what she is doing!!! Even if Tatiana made her do some of the the evil things she not only agree to do them she also made her own bad bad bad things!!!!! God I hate her so much!!! It was a trap for James the moment Tatiana came and was like “Can you plese help me cut the throns?” nooooo he can’t!!!!! Get out!!!! James should have sensed that there was something wired going on, but bless him his heart is to good to sense that!!!

I love how Matthew never liked Grace and that scene with her when they talked I got sooo mad so so mad!!!! I love Matthew but he needs to tell James or even Cordelia about what Garce said and did!!! And Matthew how could you let them alone at the end how??? When I read that part, when the evil thing but the bracelet back on James’s wrist I was beyond furios that was the last bit, I wanted to throw the book on a wall!!! vfsdjhfgdhjsgfdshgfsh!!!!! And pleaseeeeeee someoneeee I don’t care if it is Matthew or Cordelia or anyone elese PLEASE TAKE THAT DAMED BRACELET OF JAMES!!!!!! They must see that there is something about that bracelet please please please Magnus, anyone plese!!!

According to the family tree from Clockwork Princess our Miss Grace is going to be with Christopher PLESE NO! Christopher is to good for her, he is too nice he deserves something better than Grace I love Christiopher plese don’t let her ruin him! I know that that family tree isn’t reliable but still I went in fulll on detectiv Mode through the whole book checking that tree and making theories and everything!!!! And I need some awnsers!!!!

When Barbara died ( I didn’t know her that well but she seamed so nice I liked her and I fell so sorry for Sophie and Gideon!!!) an alarm in my head went on because in the epiloge of Clockwork Princess, when Will died they said that Sophie’s girls where there and I was like nooo there is a mistake how?? How can Sophie’s girls be at Will’s death of Barbara just died!And than it occured to me that Cassie changed her mind and decided to kill Barbara then, we can’t trust anything!!! Anything is opssible anything can happen and I am so scared!!!!

Returining to Grace and Tatiana.... why on earth does no one acknowledge that Tatiana is mad??? She is wearing the same dress she wore when her husband died every freaking day??!! They must see that there is something wrong with her! And letting her adopt a child who she obviosly ruined is another crazy thing!!!! Why does no one see that??? Why??? James sweetheath the moment you met Grace you should have run to Tessa and and tell her that crazy Tatiana is keeping a girl in that run down house!! He would have done a good thing for her if he had told anyone about her but than again Grace is crazy herself and maybe she would have stabed everyone in the Institute in the middle of the night! And Tatiana is now going to the Iron Sisters and I am so freaking scared of what she is going to do...

Poor Jesse she seams so nice comapred to his crazy mother and sister how can he be so nice when they are so out of thier minds??? I am dying to know how Lucie is going to bring him back to life, God forbid Grace makes her do something to carzy I mean it is crazy enough they want to bring Jesse back with necromacie and I guess it runs in the family *cough cough Ty* to bring back the dead but I fear joing Grace in this thing isn’t good for Lucie! Omg but I loved that scene where Lucie compared Jesse to Snow White that was hilarious.😂😂😂

Speaking of Luice I really love her, I love that she wants to be a writer, I love how Tessa and Will teached their children to love books! And Lucie she is so funny and god she and Matthew would have been so beautiful together... but again she is made for Jesse and as I also like him may they be happy together! I also have to say that she gave me especially in the beginning Anne with an E vibes she kind of reminder me of Anne.

Quick thing about James I want to learn more about his power with the shadow realm and also about Lucie’s obviously but I have to say that in the beginning when he was constantly jumping throw the realms... that reminder me soooo hard of Stranger Things!!!😂 I know it’s crazy but here me out, to me it sounded so much like The Upside Down and James reminder me of Will from Stranger Things like I don’t know maybe I’m just crazy but I also imagined that one demon the one from the greenhouse who multiplied looked like that thing from Strager Things who also left those baby monsters everywhere!😂😂

I think it’s time for Cordelia now, but before I go on with her I want to also say a word about Alastair. So I can’t forgive him because of what he did to Matthew and I am still not sure if I like him but I do understand him now. I loved seeing this other side of him, seeing him somehow vulnerable and I loved that he cares about Cordelia and that in a wiered way he truly is a good brother to her! And I do understand even tho that doesn’t excuse his actions, why he was so mean and that it was all because he was alone and feard to be bullyed and that in some messed up way it was because of his dad. I do beleve there is good in him and I am so here for him chainging into a good person and apologiseing for what he did and said that hurt others. Speaking of his father tho... I don’t now what to think about him... he didn’t want to se Jem after he became a Silent Brother even tho he was his only relative.... I think that says enogh about him... I am curios tho to see how he is when he cames back in Chain of Iron. Ahhhh and if we are already at it... Sona... I didn’t like her in the beginng she was so stiff and somewhat mean but that thowords the end I stated to sympathise her I felt sorry for her in a way and I realised that she only wanted her children to be well.

Oh God and also the other big thing that made me go into a next level detective mode was Cortana, because.... so Cortana belongs to Cordelia, it belongs to the Carstairs family AND it remains in the Carstairs family because Emma has it and her father a Carstairs gave it to her.... and if we check the family tree John Carstairs Emma’s father is Alastair’s son BUT and here comes the big thing how is that possible first that Alastair has a son ( maybe he adopted???) and than second how is it possible that Cortana remained in the Carstairs family because if Cordelia marries regardeless if it is James or not, the sword isn’t going to remain in the Carstairs familly unless Cordelia decides for whatever reason that she wants to give HER SWORD the sword that CHOSE HER to her nephew and not to her own child??!!! What is going on??? I want to know??? How does Cortana remain in the Carstairs family HOW??? I am so intrigued I want to know this so badly!!!

Now that we have that of the table we can talk about Cordelia, so first I love how she is friends with Lucie, I do want to see more of their friendship tho! I do like her, I wan’t sure in the beginning because in the beginning she was so focused on her father and on making a good inpresion that I don’t konw.. but than I learned to love her, I love how fearless she is and how she loves her friends and risks her life for them, she is so great! And I love her with James, I do like all the drama with Matthew ahhh but she and James they need to be toghether! At the end when she “saved him” from Tatiana’s acusation I was like “GIRLS WAHT ARE YOU DOING ARE YOU INSAINE???” but than I understood that that is just how she is, she protects her loved ones and I love her for that! But damn it hurt so much when James said that he doesn’t love her because of that fraking bracelet ahhhh my heath poor Cordelia!!!! James do loves her he does he just neds to take that damed thing of his wrist and they can be togehter!!! It is so obvious and after the Whisper Room thing like people you could have stoped but you didn’t just please talk about your feelings!!! But no our evil Grace neded to come with her bracelet!!! I have to honest from the moment she put that thing back on his hand till the very end I felt sick I felt like I was going to throw up that’s how much the whole situation shaked me.😂😂

And if there is one thing I leared this summer from the books I read, especialy this and Again but Better, it’s that for god’s sake you should always say what you feel when you feel it regardeless of the conseconces just tell the people you love that you love them because there is so much to lose if you don’t! So much can happen not within days but within hours, like for example crazy Grace putting on a bewiched bracelet on your crush, and you will regrett not have said it before when you had the chance! I am so excited to see how this fake marriage thing goes, it’s definitely going to be very interesting!

Ah and another thing I loved about this book is the friendship between all of the cousins! I love how close they all are, that they grew up togetehr and that they are so close it so beautiful! I love the Merry Thieves and I love how they now included the girls ( I don’t know what I feel about the new Italian girl I need to meet her before I approve her into the group) and I love how everyone is everyones cousin even tho they are not actualy cousins and ahhhhh the friendship between Anna and Matthew their trips to the Hell Ruelle omg I live for that!!! I love how they meet at the Devil Tavern and plan their moves, it so beautiful! I love that Tessa and Will and all the parents made their children all grow up together making them grow so close!!! They are one big family!

Thomas I haven’t said anything about him yet, I love him I realy like him and I love how close he is particlary to Christopher! I love how kind he is and I also love how like his father he went to Madrird. And I love Anna, I love how observent she is, that she sensed a wiredness between James and Cordelia and I love how she gifted Cordelia all those dressed like omg!

Ah and I also do need to say how much I dislike Charles, like how was it possible that out of such nice people as Charlotte and Henry (I loved seeing Henry again in this book bless him) somone so awful as Charles can come out? I rellly don’t like him! Not that Ariadne cared but how could he leave her while she was dying? Who does that? I guess he truly deserves to be with Grace tho I feel sorry for Charlotte and Henry to have to welcome her into the family!

I sorry this booktalk got so long but had a lot to say and I still have a few more things to say one of which is about the London quarantine in this book, like the irony in it the fact thate we were all in quaratine when this book came out is just... I couldn’t ’t belive my eyes when I read it! Overall I love that the book took place in London, London is my favourite city in the world and returning there through this book esspecial at the time ahhh it was perfect, I loved returing to the London Institute, I loved the dresses andthe fashion everything! I loved the way they all spoke and they sayings it was all so perfect!

This book was just everything I needed right now and I am more than gald that I decided to read it! I can’t let it go yet tho I am still to attached to everything my crush on Matthew is still buring bright and I can’t let it and I don’t want to let it fade! I’m also more than excited for Chain of Iron, March can’t come soon enogh! I dying to see what happens and how all this drama is going to be solved!

Oh goodness and I almost forgot thanks to everyone who makes Shdowhunter memes, esspecally the ones about Chain of Gold like really they make my day! I am sometimes sitting for hours looking at them laughing!😂😂Some of them are pure gold! Thank you!

And I also want to thank everyone who came this far and read all of this you are true legends!

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emeraldtawny · 5 years ago

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Wow I have to say that I adore you and your blog as always... It's been solid months but to find that you're still here and writing for otome games honestly makes me very happy. also it's hilarious to find that our taste in faves still seem to be really similar lmao. I love your thoughts on Dazai!!! Because that's honestly something I've been thinking about myself since the moment I started playing Ikevamp hahaha. I love how interested and knowledgable you are concerning the IRL people (1/?)

Jsjsxjksksbdms AAAAAA ANON!!! It’s always so encouraging when my dumb ramblings get a response like this. I have the biggest smile on my face right now, thank you so much hdbdkndjs. And may I say...TASTE ANON, TASTE!! Excellent choice in 2D men, she says with incredible bias bdjdndk. You are very right in your assumption of Satan being my fave OM boi...I love him ;w;

Aaaaa idk what to say to this other than jdjdkxhjdnfkejxkdnckdmjs????? I just really like finding parallels between IRL and fiction when a character is based off of a person who actually existed in our world. And the fact that at least one other person likes listening to me yelling about usually very depressing IRL lives just because I’m curious of how accurate the company wrote their fictional counterpart is...very humbling. Gives me them warm fuzzies uwu.

And anon, I feel you on the whole “leaving him until last” part. Gotta keep ramping up that angst every time and make us cry ;w; makes me super nervous for Sebas’ eventual route, like how on earth are they gonna make him sad? They have complete free reign to destroy us jfndjdnkd. And yes to the recommend route order type deal. That’s why I like games like these that slowly open up routes and make it very distinguishable of the order they want you to play it in. But with Dazai especially, all we’ve gotten so far is crumbs, and we’ll continue to only get tiny morsels until a bit later. Was it on purpose for his elusive character? Did Cybird genuinely forget he existed until they dropped his route? Who knows hfnkdjdkdkd.

I honestly have no idea of the “rival” for Dazai. Since there’s now new characters (Vlad, Charles Henri Sanson and Johann Georg Faust), it could be one of them (many MANY hints pointing to Charles on this front). I don’t want to hold out hope for any rival in particular otherwise I’ll get too sweeped up into it, but GOD if it was Sakunosuke or ofc Chuuya for those who knew BSD before IkeVamp lmao. That being said, I won’t know until I play his route...and I don’t plan on playing it until English release. so imma sit here simmering on my theories and my angst for like 2 years hdndkdkd.

I think I’ve rambled enough now. Thank you for enabling me to scream into the void, lovely anon. Thank you for your continued support, silent or otherwise (though I love being screamed at, I must admit hfjdndkdk). Hope you have a lovely day~

#tawny rambles #lovely anon #who am i yelling about? just Dazai nothing new hdbjdndks #aaaa im still unable to express words even when writing this all out #this was exactly that i needed especially with my recent dry patch in writing #thank you again anon ;w;

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carapeace · 5 years ago

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(ok so the keep reading thing is being Weird And Mean so i had to repost the whole thing)

(i’m sorry @involuntarydiaphragmspasm if you got multiple notifs for this i was tryna figure out how to make it work aaaaa)

but here it is if you want to read!! sorry i just saw the shark and kinda ran with the first idea that popped into my head and thus may have not captured all the other emojis well enough oops

Thanks so much for the ask!! 💞

There were few things in this world that Nino Lahiffe was afraid of.

And when he says few, he means very few. Heights? No problem. Snakes? They were cool. Spiders? Irritating, but not scary. (Unless you happened to be Anansi.)

But sharks?

That was at the top of his fears list. Public enemy number one. Maybe it was seeing Jaws when he was five years old or maybe it was the turtle in him, but he hated sharks.

The rest of his fears list was remarkably small. The dark (since he was a kid), blood, public speaking, and Kagami Tsurugi.

(He couldn’t help it. She terrified him.)

So he was not thrilled, to say the least, to be trapped in an aquarium with nobody but Kagami to keep him company.

This was gonna be a long akuma fight.

They were all there in the first place because Marinette was paired up with Adrien on a marine biology project, and the two of them had to go to the aquarium to research, and of course Marinette couldn’t spend more than five minutes alone with Adrien without spontaneously combusting so she had to invite Alya as backup and then Alya invited Nino so she wouldn’t be third-wheeling and then Adrien asked Kagami and by some miracle she could come.

So the five of them went to the aquarium that day, Marinette and Adrien taking notes on the animals and Alya marveling at how cute the two of them were and Nino trying not to show how scared he was. He had no idea what Kagami was doing--he refused to look at her, because you never look your fears right in the eye.

Alya noticed he was acting apprehensive about halfway through, and she nudged him. “Everything all right, babe? You’re looking kind of pale.”

He nodded, managed a smile. Not even Alya knew how scared he was of sharks. And he couldn’t explain it to her now--she’d probably laugh. (Not in a mean way, in a boy-isn’t-it-ironic-that-I-made-you-face-your-worst-fear-by-accident way. He loved his girlfriend more than life, but sometimes she could be kind of tactless, and he didn’t really feel like having this conversation.) So he waved his hand. “Yeah. Everything’s fine.”

She clutched his arm and pointed straight ahead. “Look! A tunnel!”

He looked. It was indeed a tunnel.

She started pulling him by the elbow, holding up her phone. “We can watch all the fish swim around us! I’ve only seen this kind of thing in movies--c’mon!”

Marinette and Adrien were already inside, taking notes on the animals that they saw and reading the signs. Kagami was following them. She stepped into the tunnel and the blue light washed over her--she looked like a kid stepping into a candy store, her eyes lighting up, her mouth dropping open at the sharks swimming overhead and all around.

That was one long tunnel... Nino couldn’t even see the exit.

He gulped.

“All right.”

He took a tentative step inside the tunnel, trying not to cringe as a shark passed by overhead. Alya was all over everything, reading signs about the water pressure, about all the different animals. She always looked ethereal when she was passionate about something.

Nino tried not to imagine a shark swooping down and biting her head off.

Don’t think about that, don’t think about that...

Quite suddenly, there was a loud siren that made them all jump. Akuma alert, the loudspeaker blared. Akuma in the jellyfish hall. Please shelter in place immediately.

Oh, shit, Nino thought.

Marinette went pale and dropped her notebook, Adrien lunging and catching it just in time. He handed it to her. “I think... I think I have to go to the bathroom.”

“Uh, yeah... I think I left my purse in the touch pool room,” Marinette stammered. “I don’t want to lose it during the attack.”

They shared a glance, then sprinted toward the tunnel exit and out of sight.

Alya had to call Nino’s name several times before he heard it, and when he turned to her, she grinned and held her phone up. “I’ve got to film this. Ladybug and Chat Noir will be here any minute!”

And she ran off, too.

Not a minute too early, because the loudspeaker kept saying please shelter in place and then suddenly the ends of the tunnel were starting to close and the siren was going off and everything was too loud and he was trapped.

Nino Lahiffe was trapped in an enclosed tunnel, facing two of his five greatest fears in the face.

Shit shit shit.

Fear number five still hadn’t moved. She was staring at the sharks, eyes wide, washed in the blue light from the water. She followed a shark with her eyes.

Nino sat down and tried not to tremble.

Shiiiiiiit.

Then, so suddenly it made him jump, she snapped her head toward him, eyes locking onto his. Like an owl. Or a shark. “Nino, is it?”

He cleared his throat. “Yes.”

“I don’t think we’ve met.”

“Yeah.”

Silence. Nino tried not to watch the sharks. He pigeon-toed his feet inwards. This nightmare couldn’t be over fast enough.

The silence was actually kind of peaceful, he thought. If he didn’t think about the sharks. Or Kagami. If he just thought about the water, the coral, the calmness of it all--

“Is Nino a full name or a nickname?”

He jumped again. “Jeez, dude, don’t do that, you scared me--”

“Oh,” said Kagami. She looked down at her feet, and he swore she looked--sad? No. Trick of the light.

“Nino’s my full name,” he said quietly. “I don’t have any nicknames.”

He made the mistake of looking to the left then, and a giant shark passed by, so big his whole body could fit in its mouth. It took him a minute to realize his arm was trembling and another minute to steady himself.

He leaned against the wall that had trapped him in the tunnel, hoping it would open, wondering if it would make him feel better or worse to play some music right about now. On the one hand, no more awkward conversations with Kagami. On the other hand, a shark could easily attack him and he wouldn’t hear anything.

He decided the safest bet was to leave the headphones off.

“What’s your blood type?”

“What?”

Kagami turned towards him. She looked so much like a shark in this light that it gave him the shivers. “Your blood type.”

“I don’t know.” And he didn’t really want to talk about it. Blood was fear number three. He didn’t much feel like adding another fear to the pile right about now.

“That’s very interesting. Marinette didn’t know hers, either. I suppose it’s a French thing, to not know your blood type. I am O.”

“Huh.”

She resumed her post, watching the animals. He’d have thought she was a statue, how still she was. “Do you like sitting there?”

“What?”

“Sitting where you are. Do you like it?”

Nino shrugged, and then the impossible happened--she walked over next to him and sat down.

This day could not get any worse.

She looked at him, and somehow he found himself looking back, even though you never look your fears in the eye, Lahiffe, what are you DOING?

“Do you drink orange juice?”

He shook his head to clear it and looked at the ceiling--no, don’t look there, there are sharks. There was a fear everywhere he turned. The safest bet was just to look at the floor.

“Yeah, sometimes,” he said to his sneakers.

“Me, too,” she said.

And then something weird took hold of his words and suddenly he choked out “do you like soda?”

She shrugged, looked up at the sharks above. “My mother says that soda has too much sugar. But she allowed orange juice. It was the sweetest drink I had as a kid. I always loved it. Sometimes I had it for dessert.”

“Orange juice for dessert?” he cried.

Kagami looked at him with a weird expression on her face. “Yes. What?”

“Nothing,” he mumbled. “It’s just--you should try soda. When you get the chance.”

“Okay,” she replied, and they lapsed into silence.

Nino thought of Alya, whether she was getting herself into trouble or whether she was staying safe. He really hoped she was okay, that she wasn’t in too much danger.

“What’s your favorite animal?” said Kagami.

“Turtle,” replied Nino without thinking.

Kagami cocked her head. “Why?”

“They’re--” he thought. “They’re survivors.”

Kagami nodded sagely, like he’d just said something very wise.

“What about you?”

“Dragon,” said Kagami. “Even though they’re not real in the technical sense. They’re powerful, in a special kind of way. But if I had to pick a real animal... sharks. I’ve never seen one in person before.”

Sharks.

Of course this girl’s favorite animal would be sharks.

Kagami frowned. “Is everything all right, Nino?”

Nino filled up his lungs, emptied them. He stuck his head between his knees.

“I’m scared of sharks.”

It was very strange saying the words out loud. He’d never told anybody that, not even Alya. Not even Chris. And now here he was, telling his fifth fear about his first fear for no particular reason--what was going on with him today?

There was a few seconds of silence, and then Kagami said, “Oh. Was that why you looked so uncomfortable?”

Nino nodded.

“I’m sorry, Nino.”

Nino blinked. “It’s all right. I’m sorry--I shouldn’t have even--forget it.”

Silence for one two three four five six seven heart-stopping seconds--

Then Kagami reached out a tentative hand and placed it on his shoulder. She left it there for a few seconds and made something that resembled a smile, and it dawned on Nino in that moment that maybe she was a little bit afraid of him, too.

She retracted her hand and wrapped her arms around her legs, curled up in a ball. Both of them watched the water overhead.

He turned to her. “What kind of music do you listen to?”

“I don’t.”

He laughed. When she didn’t join in, he stopped. “You’re serious.”

She nodded. “My mother says it’s a distraction.”

“You don’t listen to music?”

She shook her head, looking politely bewildered. “Is that bad?”

Nino, in a split-second decision, pulled his headphones off his neck and placed them on her ears, sweeping her hair out of the way. She sat up straight, surprised. “What--”

“Trust me.”

He picked up his phone and scrolled through the library--a song that Kagami would like. What song would Kagami like? He barely knew the girl. Ten minutes ago she was his fifth greatest fear, and now...

Now he didn’t know.

He picked out a lofi song, slow and calm, with a low beat that always reminded him of the color blue. He pressed play, and at first Kagami looked surprised, but after a couple of seconds she relaxed and started to close her eyes.

That day was the first time Nino had ever seen Kagami Tsurugi smile, eyes closed, head leaned back on the floor of the aquarium during an akuma attack while Ladybug and Chat Noir were off doing who knew what and there was water on all sides of them and the sharks swam and danced overhead.

It was gorgeous.

By the time Nino left the aquarium that day, one of his fears was gone.

#miraculous #miraculous ladybug #nino #kagami #involuntarydiaphragmspasm #thanks for the ask ily #this was super fun #i totally got carried away it's way longer than i thought it was gonna be #but anyway here you go!!!

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