#I have to say it's beautiful living in times where shows marketed for kids can be so carefully crafted

[vervainvoyage]

Soooo after I reblogged some of OSP's JttW content, I get the Lego Monkie Kid recommended posts and blogs thrown at me every 4 minutes on my dash. Fiiiine, I went to check out the pilot.

And ok.

Tumblr was right.

The pilot episode is hilarious and the animation ABSOLUTELY SLAPS. I keep rewinding because there are so many good gags happening in the background, or just because the animation was so pretty I wanted to see it thrice. This is like a crackfic with the production value of movie theater animated blockbusters.

[asbealthgn]

Eddie is used to getting recognized in public, but it doesn’t mean he likes it.

And Gareth knows how much he doesn’t like it, so Eddie’s not really sure why his best friend has completely abandoned him like this. Well, maybe abandon is a little dramatic. He said he’d be right back, but that was half an hour ago, and there’s only so many times he can circle the park and dive into bushes anytime someone gets too close. Which is why Eddie left the park altogether and is now sitting at a bus station. No one would expect notorious Corroded Coffin frontman Eddie Munson to be at a bus station, right?

Except he’s not sure the hat and sunglasses and incongruous location are quite doing their job. A group of kids across the road have stopped and they’re all whispering amongst themselves as they look at him. Eddie really wishes he had something to conceal himself with, but his hand over his face would definitely look way too suspicious. He’s thinking he might just have to cut and run and take his chances back in the park bushes.

That is, until the most beautiful man he’s ever seen in his life sits in the seat next to him, unfurling a giant map that easily shields both of them. Eddie’s fucking savior.

“Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know how to get to Japantown, would you?” the guy asks.

As it happens, Eddie does know how to get to Japantown. He hasn’t actually ridden the bus in years, but he still remembers the route. “Yeah,” he says, pointing it out on the map. “You just get on line five headed east and ride it like nine or ten stops until you get to McAllister and Fillmore. From there you just have to walk a few blocks to get into the area.”

The guy looks at him with big eyes, brown and a little droopy. “McAllister and Fillmore,” he repeats, like he’s trying to memorize it. He has pretty pink lips, glistening a little like he’s wearing lipgloss. 

Fuck, he’s adorable. And looks a bit prone to getting lost. And Eddie’s still kind of mad at Gareth for leaving him high and dry out here. So as the bus pulls up to the stop, Eddie figures what the hell?

“I’m actually headed that way,” Eddie says, standing. “I can show you.”

The guy’s whole face brightens and fuck, he really is gorgeous. “You don’t mind?”

“Not at all, big boy.”

The bus is blessedly empty other than one shriveled up lady sitting towards the front with her groceries and a teenager in the middle with giant headphones and their nose in a book. Eddie heads to the back with the guy, who now has a faint blush dusting his nose and cheeks.

“I’m Steve, by the way,” he says as he sits in the seat next to Eddie. “What’s your name?”

So that confirms that Steve doesn’t know who he is. It didn’t seem like he did from how he was reacting, but it’s a bit of relief to know for sure. “Eddie,” he says, bumping his shoulder into Steve’s. “Nice to meet you.”

Steve gives him a smile that’s about as radiant as the sun as he nudges Eddie’s shoulder back. “You too.”

“So what do you have going on in Japantown?” Eddie asks.

“I’m headed to a baby shower for some friends who live near there,” he says, “Well, it’s not a real baby shower.”

“No?”

“‘Cause it’s not a real baby. That is, it’s not a human baby.”

Eddie lifts his eyebrows. “I think you lost me.”

Steve twists in his seat and starts gesturing with his hands. “Well, it all started when they found out that one of their cats wasn’t actually spayed and had gotten knocked up by a stray,” he says, “And Robin was like, ‘Hey, more cats, that’s a good thing,’ and Nancy was like, ‘No, our neighbors already think we’re crazy cat ladies.’”

“Uh huh.”

“So they compromised and decided they would keep one kitten and give the rest away,” Steve says, “So it’s less of a come give us presents for our baby shower and more of a please take our babies away shower. You know?”

“Oh yeah, one of those,” Eddie says, and Steve laughs. 

“Hey, are you in the market for a kitten?” he asks. “Cause if you are, I totally know where you can get one.”

It’s Eddie’s turn to laugh. “Honestly?” he says, “I’ve got nothing else going on. Why the hell not?”

Steve gives him another one of those radiant smiles and Eddie can’t help but hope he gets more than a kitten by the end of this.

[twinqq]

"thorin has decided to stay with bilbo in shire" "bilbo has decided to stay with thorin in erebor" okay now listen. hear me out. it's both.

their homes is so important to both of them, because a huge part of bilbo's motivation to help dwarves on their quest is that bilbo loves his home dearly and wants for the company to have a home, too, and thorin's entire character is built around erebor.

so after the battle of five armies bilbo stays in the erebor for a bit, to help here and there, to see how the weight lifts of his friends' shoulders and they are happier than ever, to watch over wounded thorin and talk to him about a lot of things, and, when thorin is fully healed and he's on the throne again, he says his goodbyes to everyone, kiss thorin farewell (gently, in the forehead (thorin, the great and almighty king under the mountain, is bowing down for the little hobbit), while stroking his hair) and goes back to the shire.

they are writing letters to each other all the time. thorin has memorized every little curve of bilbo's handwriting, while he carefully read through shire's gossip and pies recepies and so, so many love words. bilbo learns a bit of khuzdul and everything about how's erebor restoration is going. thorin's letters is full of marks and word crossed out to the point where they cannot be seen (bilbo knows, that the words are "i miss you")

more importantly, every once in a while bilbo pack his things, hangs the "gone to visit a friend" sign and goes to erebor. he has a status of a king's quest and gold jewelry in his hair. he teaches dwarves new recepies, and works in a garden he planted, and feasts with his friends, and also provides helpful advice on the council meetings he attends. he's with thorin every second he can do so.

at some point he starts to bring frodo with him, and every member of the company adores him (even dwalin. especially dwalin, even he's not showing it.). thorin teaches him how to use a sword, listens to his rants about everything, and, if some dwarves catch their king on his throne entirely unmoving because some hobbit kid has fell asleep by his side, well, it's not like there haven't been rumors.

and, every once in a while, thorin is declaring that he is going on a hunt, or a travel to foreign lands, or something like that, and will take only his closest men with him, and slips away to the shire. company parts ways with him somewhere on the road, and thorin quietly arrives in bag end. guess who's changing in clothes that bilbo altered specially for thorin because no, you won't go to the market fully armoured, and is learning how to make pastry and how to choose vegetables on the market, and is helping with routine tasks like carrying heavy pumpkins and scooping them, and is also fixing broken cart or door or shutter because yes, he may be a king, but he's also a skilled craftsman. yep, you've guessed it.

thorin also sometimes helps bilbo's neighbors on occasion, and their fear changes to curiosity (oh, who's this very quiet and stoic dwarf who lives with you, mister baggins?)

also he's carving toys and little trinkets that go either to bilbo's shelves or to shire's children. also frodo is radiating with happiness every time uncle thorin is visiting bag end. also thorin gets to see how the acorn bilbo planted in his garden grows into beautiful oak.

in erebor bilbo can break out of the constancy that sometimes oppresses him, and in bag end thorin can be domestic, soft and vulnerable. but what's more important is that they are together, and they are home.

they are like hades and persephone folks...

[oneforthemunny]

A song that reminds you of each of your Eddie's + reader- and GO!

ooh wait this is a fun one. ok i had to think about this one but i think i've found them:

boxer!eddie and reader remind me of somethin' stupid by frank sinatra and nancy sinatra. two little black cats in love, and the chorus "and have a drink or two, and then i go and spoil it all by saying somethin' stupid like, "i love you". i can see it in your eyes that you despise the same old lies you heard the night before. and though it's just a line to you, for me it's true and never seemed so right before."

rockstar!eddie and nepobaby!reader will forever remind me of faithfully by journey. i mean, "and lovin' a music man ain't always what it's supposed to be. oh, girl, you stand by me. circus life under the big-top world. we all need the clowns to make us smile. through space and time, always another show. wonderin' where I am lost without you. i'm forever yours, faithfully."

this one is going to be so fucking corny and idgaf!!! but for modern!eddie and mean girl, idk why true love by p!nk always comes to mind. "at the same time, i wanna hug you, i wanna wrap my hands around your neck. you're the only love i've ever known. but i hate you, i really hate you, so much i think it must be true love. just once try to wrap your little brain around my feelings, just once please try no to be so mean."

cowboy!eddie and sweet girl have always and will forever remind me of love is like a butterfly by the one and mother fucking only dolly parton our lord and savior. "love makes your heart feel strange inside, it flutters like soft wings in flight. love is like a butterfly, a rare and gentle thing. i feel it when you kiss me, it happens when you're with me, that rare and gentle feelin' that i feel inside. everyday is springtime, and i am only happy when you are by my side." tbh i could quote the whole goddam song.

bouncer!eddie and bartender!reader this is another corny as fuck on so hold on, but it's you shook me all night long by acdc lmaooo. sexual chemistry through the roof, so much that it's shocking and appalling?? "she was a fast machine, she kept her motor clean. she was the best damn woman that I ever seen. she's one of a kind, she's just mine, all mine." idk it's silly and slutty and fun just like them!

for janitor!eddie and teacher!reader i've always felt like forever by the beach boys is their song. super sappy and romantic and devoted and that's how they are to each other <3 "if every word i said could make you laugh, i'd talk forever. i asked the sky just what we had, it shone forever. let the love i have for you, live in your heart and be forever. forever, i've been so happy loving you."

older!eddie and reader, this one was hard bc i felt like there was so many to chose from, but ultimately i went with the one song that always takes me back to them and that's chemtrails over the country club by lana. the more i listen, the more it's their song bc "go to the market, the kids' swimming pools. me and my sister just playing it cool, under the chemtrails over the country club. meet you for coffee at the elementary schools. we laugh about nothing as the summer gets cool. it's beautiful how this deep normality settles down over me. i'm not bored or unhappy, i'm still so strange and wild. washing my hair, doing the laundry. late-night tv, i want you only. it's never too late, baby, so don't give up."domestic and sweet.

this is also so silly and sweet and the best thing ever but for hockey!eddie and reader i fucking love the song hello, hello by elton john (yes from gnomeo and juliet lmaoooo). "never gonna find anything to change my mind, famous last lines of a fool. hello, hello. my, my, my, what have we here? sniffing all the flowers, running through an autumn shower, compare it to someone else like me." so fucking silly and so romantic like it's them. happy and silly and in love.

and i know you guys are making fun of me and i don't give one fuck bc i know you're about to do it again with this one bc it's coming completely out of left fucking field for these two!! for mafia!eddie and reader... babe i'm saying it, it's i see the light from tangled yes it fucking is. "all that time never even knowing, just how blind i've been. now i'm here, blinking in the starlight. and it's warm and real and bright, and the world has somehow shifted. all at once everything looks different, now that i see you. all those years living in a blur. if she's here, it's crystal clear, i'm where i'm meant to go." and listen, i could write a goddam essay on how this is them, both of them. living their lives before, thinking they're content, until they met the other and now they're confused how they were ever without the other. real ride or die shit.

for dom!eddie and sub!reader, i always think of i don't want to miss a thing by aerosmith lol. really bc they're a little chaotic but they really do love each other sm. true soulmate shit. "i could spend my life in this sweet surrender, where a moment with you is a moment i treasure. i don't wanna miss one smile, i don't wanna miss one kiss. i just wanna be with you, right her with you, just like this. and i just wanna hold you close, feel your heart so close to mine, and just stay here in this moment for all the rest of time." overly passionate and lovey and dramatic which is just their style.

[17-noodlebird]

World Three = The Fair Land Of Medievia

🏰👑👸🦄💂🐸🧜‍♀️🧚🧞‍♂️

~~~~

Jewel: Rhodochrosite

Power: Crystals

Color: Mauve

Theme: Fairytale Princesses & The Middle Ages

~~~~

Objective:

Go on a quest to save the fair Princess of Medievia from an evil dragon and bring her to her Prince Charming.

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Chapter III: Your Princess Is In Another Castle

~~~~

The third episode/chapter pays homage to the “Shrek” franchise from DreamWorks, the Disney Renaissance movies of the 1990’s, the classic fairytale tropes, fables, and nursery rhymes of your childhood, the medieval era kingdoms of the past, and the “bedtime story” movie plot from your favorite movies.

The episode begins on an unconventional note, where the first scene is that of a live action mom and her daughter getting ready for bed, while pop music plays in the background. The two talk about what a wonderful day it has been, as the daughter asks her mom to read her a bedtime story. As the mom rummages through some classic fairy-tales, she stumbles upon a mauve-colored storybook, of which she never read to her daughter before, and asks if she would like for her to tell the story of “The Kinger & His Knight”. Upon questioning about the alleged misspelling of the word “King”, the mom shrugs it off, saying she herself has never read it either and that she found it at a flea market one day. The mom decides to read the story to her daughter, starting with the iconic words: “Once upon a time…”

The camera zooms in to the interior of the book, where from here on out, the mom becomes this episode’s narrator as we meet Team Circus yet again in the Magical Digital Van, all while Pomni and Kinger sing along to “All Star” by Smash Mouth, with Caine behind the wheel, as usual. When Pomni excitedly asks to play the song again, Bubble, who is feeling anxious right now, says that she and Kinger have played that song six times already, with Jax replying that enough might be enough for them all. None of that matters now as Valerie (who had been on a phone call with Caine via one of the Communicator Bracelets) tells them that they have arrived at their next destination, The Fair Land Of Medievia.

Medievia looks just like a kingdom from the Middle Ages, with a beautiful castle, a medieval town, commoners walking amongst the beautifully-dressed aristocrats, all while sharing the same theme of the medieval era, with knights, princes, princesses, and bards. As Team Circus looks around in awe over how well-detailed this town is (the animation style of this place is reminiscent to that of the classic Disney movies), Caine and Bubble try to find a place where they can stay, using some of the money left over from the previous episode, and it's there that we are greeted by a traveling bard by the name of Stumpulot, a flutist who is in search of a permanent residence as well as a well-paying job, whom Pomni immediately befriends after sharing that the she and her friends also need a place to stay since they're tourists from a different area. The two proceed to sing about their new friendship and the things they share in common. (How exactly would that work? I don't suppose anyone would want to hear a Lizzie Freeman and Patrick Stump duet, do they?)

We cut back to the live-action daughter asking why this bedtime story is a musical all of a sudden, before the mom answers that it just is, before showing her the lyrics and music sheet of the song that Pomni and Stumpulot just sang. The daughter's only reply is a flat “Oh.”

We cut back AGAIN to Team Circus, who are having a lunch break in a tavern called “The Triskelion”, where Pomni and Stumpulot storm into the tavern, and they beg like little kids if he can join them on their adventure, puppy dog eyes and all. At first Caine refuses, voicing his skepticism from the last time they trusted someone, but after Ragatha and Jax of all people join in on the cutesy pleading, he gives in, and allows the bard to join them. Hooray!! Through Zooble's assistance, they were able to find a nice cozy area where they can stay for the night, called the Fox Inn. As Team Circus settles into their room for the night, Kinger puts on a movie via Bubble's communicator bracelet, and he chooses Shrek 2. Stumpulot comments that Medievia used to have such whimsical characters (i.e., the fairytale characters everyone knows and loves) back in the day before the King decided that they were simply too much and relocated them somewhere else in the kingdom. While Pomni tries to enjoy the movie, she can't help but think to herself what might have happened to these characters.

The next morning, at like 4:45 AM, the room service lady, named Janiss, wakes the still sleeping group to inform them that everyone in the kingdom (yes, even the visitors) are invited to the King's Grand gala to celebrate his daughter's Sweet 16 — already, they can tell just how unapologetically self-indulgent the guy is. Kinger is, for some reason, the only one excited because of his belief that he himself is royalty (as seen in the canon pilot), so this is his chance to actually impress someone like him, much to Caine's concerns. The two have a conversation as the others get dressed for the gala (eat up Royalteeth shippers!), with Kinger musing how much Queenie would have loved to attend an actual party hosted by a member of royalty, and Caine just praying that everything will work out in the end, as so far, nothing has gone wrong, which only fills the ringmaster with so much dread. Kinger remarks that this is the first time the two have actually talked like actual close friends since Queenie's abstraction and yet, there's still a rift between the two of them. The chess piece asks if everything is okay, to which Caine just responds with the usual “I'm fine”. Like he had been for years now. “Well, if you need anything, you can always come talk to me. I miss having you with me all the time.” Kinger replies.

Team Circus, now fully dressed like medieval characters at a ball, head towards the castle on foot, with Pomni remarking to Ragatha that Kinger hasn't acted like his kooky self since they got to Medievia, no dissociating, no easily being startled, and no short term memory loss. Perhaps it would be because this place makes him feel right at home, but she can't be too sure. Ragatha comments that while she isn't completely in the know, she has heard stories that Kinger used to be this grandfatherly figure that everyone looked up to, even Caine for some reason. The ragdoll can only hope that side of him will come back to him eventually.

With this, they arrive at the castle gates, to be greeted by a plump, Santa Claus-esque man dressed in silver, pale blue, and periwinkle, all while wearing a golden crown, who introduces himself as King Cloudbeard, through excited handshakes for each of the members of Team Circus. As they walk inside the castle's throne room itself, they are greeted to a large crowd of equally dressed guests of the kingdom, from other royals, to nobility, the working class, the commoners, and even the most destitute of peasants, all with varying degrees of color and flamboyance. The throne room is decorated with a sparkling gold and diamond-encrusted chandelier, with at least four tables of different gourmet snacks to try out, with an empty giant plate being reserved for the princess’s birthday cake for later. Speaking of the princess, King Cloudbeard’s daughter, Princess Purity, is listlessly listening to the cacophony of the party, wearing that cliché Disney Princess face of “wanting more out of life than her privileged upbringing” on her designated throne next to her father's. King Cloudbeard is happily asking how Lord Spaniel and Lady Fowl, two nobles of Medievia, are enjoying the party, which only gets eyerolls from the lord and lady, making the King's face droop with sadness.

An hour and 45 minutes pass, and Team Circus is most enjoying themselves, with the occasional influx of new guests arriving, the sound of minstrels playing different songs on their flutes, fiddles, lutes, and drums, thousands of conversations, debates, and arguments filling the air, and the damn chandelier blinding those who look at the lights for too long.

Stumpulot and Pomni take a look around the throne room and find themselves enamored with the food in the table, which consist of sliders, green bean casseroles, slices of honey glazed ham, brownies, cookies, raspberries, blackberries, cherries, thousands of plates, forks, spoon, knives, sporks, and cups, in one section of one of the four tables, and four punch bowls consisting of pink lemonade, regular lemonade, Dr. Pepper, and grape juice each, among others (to which diplomat Rionna curtly retorts that all that good food is making her hungry). When Pomni finds the King sulking near one of the food tables, she asks what's wrong, to which he replies that none of the people he wants to impress is actually enjoying the party; not even his daughter is in the spirits. Stumpulot then asks what's the giant plate for, to which the King answers it's for the birthday cake that's being presented very soon. Stumpulot and the King hit it off with each of them explaining their backstories to each other (the King's wife died recently while Stumpulot is homeless and in need of a place where he can belong) and sharing things they have in common, like wanting to make people happy. Pomni is just munching on the sliders as she watches.

Kinger takes a moment to admire the scenery, when he stumbles upon the lord and lady King Cloudbeard had just talked to. Kinger attempts to make small talk with the two, only getting snide insults from Lady Fowl as Lord Spaniel just waves his fan like a stuck-up prick. Another song ensues from the two, and it's treated like a diss track of some sorts. Gangle and Zooble are just hanging out with each other, as well as Ragatha and Jax, while Caine just stands amongst the crowd, trying to find something to do amongst the environment of bright lights, loud noises, and unfamiliar surroundings. Pomni finds her best friend Caine being idle and offers him a slider, which he politely declines. She asks what's wrong, though he tries to reassure her that he's okay, despite looking like he wants to get the hell out of here. The two have a heartfelt conversation, with Caine revealing why he doesn't know why he feels like this, or why he feels like he's always been this way, with Pomni trying to reassure him that he's not alone.

At last the birthday cake arrives and the whole crowd goes silent, with Princess Purity looking like she just witnessed a murder or something. Stumpulot catches up to Pomni and Caine as the royal chef prepares all sixteen candles (it's actually eighteen candles; the extra two are the 1 and 6 candles respectively), while King Cloudbeard makes a speech about how his daughter is finally growing up into the woman he knows she can be, mentioning how he wished his wife could be there for this momentous occasion, as he declares the whole reason why he invited everyone to the gala was so he can choose a proper suitor to marry off to the princess so she can rule Medievia one day, shocking, dismaying, and even disappointing the crowd that they had been lied to. Team Circus is noticeably not amused by this notion, with Ragatha declaring skepticism over the whole situation, only for him to justify that he had been betrothed to his wife at the age of 16, and his father before him, and his grandmother before him, and so on and so forth; it's an unyielding tradition that has been held up for generations. Princess Purity, enraged that her life is being decided for her, calls out King Cloudbeard for not even allowing the freedom she deserves, which he again tries to justify that he only wants to protect the only remaining remnant of his deceased wife. The crowd is now murmuring amongst themselves, with Lord Spaniel and Lady Fowl looking at the King in venomous disapproval, much to the latter's horror on his face as he still tries to double down on his beliefs. Furthermore, it's revealed by King Cloudbeard in the increasingly heated verbal fight that the reason why the fairytale-esque characters are no longer in Medievia was because the Queen was killed by one when the Princess was just 14, much to the shock of everyone. Stumpulot gestures to Team Circus that they should leave as things have already gotten awkward enough. The party continues on without them, although the atmosphere is a lot more tense and somber with Princess Purity looking defeated.

Two more hours pass, and we are greeted to a scene with the princess, who is looking at the golden afternoon sky as she holds a goblet of grape juice in her hands, pensive about her outburst. Wanting to apologize for stepping out of line, she attempted to go back to the party, only to bump into a distinguished and handsome gentleman, a member of royalty by the name of Prince Steele. Noticing she just ruined his suit, Purity apologizes profusely, only to tell her that it's okay and that it was an accident. When he asks what's wrong, she tells him that she feels really bad for letting the secret out about her mother’s death and the resulting persecution of all whimsical characters in the aftermath, something she feels incredibly guilty over. He tells her that it's not her fault that her dad decided to be rash about certain things, only for her to tell her that he had always been this way, even before the Queen’s untimely murder, but tries to excuse it as the King just wanting to protect his daughter. The conversation continues with Steele revealing that he also has a harsh but loving mother that he wishes would understand things the way he does, leading to the two having their romantic “I Want” duet, waltzing and all. The song ends with a tiny hint that the two may have fallen in love with each other as they say their goodbyes, with Purity and Steele heading off in separate directions.

Immediately after, the screen fade transitions to Team Circus finally arriving back at the Fox Inn. Stumpulot apologizes for the botched party visit, which Pomni brushes off as a minor inconvenience (after all, she's experienced much worse back at the Amazing Digital Circus). Caine, who has remained silent throughout the whole journey back, just plops onto one of the beds and shuts off for the night. As Stumpulot and Pomni converse with each other, he reveals that he was originally born in the same place where the fairytale characters were relocated/exiled to, and has heard the story of how the Queen was murdered:

When the King and Queen took their daughter to see a play in the nursery rhyme district of Medievia, they were ambushed by feline crooks, similar to Puss in Boots, had all their possessions stolen, with Princess Purity and her mom, the Queen, being held hostage by the leader of the crooks. King Cloudbeard fought them off as best as he could, but in doing so, he watched the carriage he, his wife, and his daughter were in, get engulfed by flames. We are treated to a scene of the Queen shielding her daughter from the flames as she screams in agony, with King Cloudbeard wailing in grief. Shortly thereafter, the King signs a paper that declares that every last fairytale creature be relocated so that he'd never have to be reminded of what he had lost again. Pomni is horrified by the story (and even shedding tears), but still reminds herself that it doesn't excuse his harsh treatment of the fairytale characters. Stumpulot can only hope that the King changes his mind and apologizes for his mistakes, as everyone else goes to sleep for the night.

We cut back to Princess Purity, who is in her room eating a slice of her birthday cake, when she happily declares to herself that she's finally made her first friend after being isolated from everyone else her whole life. We then get a POV shot to a first person view of a mysterious thug, who knocks down her room’s door, approaches the princess as she frightenedly asks who they are, and the screen fades to black as she screams in terror.

The next morning, as Team Circus sulks throughout the Medievian village, tired from yesterday's events, they are all greeted by King Cloudbeard and Prince Steele (the latter of whom they have not met before), who have run on foot to ask for help. Understandably, Team Circus refuses to buy into their claims, citing that it was his fault for the birthday party gone wrong with his incessant insisting on his warped ideas of love, until they are introduced to Prince Steele, of whom the Princess had already chosen as her suitor, immediately subverting expectations much to Team Circus's disappointment, thinking that the King got to her head. Steele, after hastily introducing himself to the others, tells that the Princess was kidnapped by some unknown thugs. Thinking it might be those “pesky fairytale hooligans” again (which Stumpulot takes great offense to), he asks them, or rather demands them, to go to the Fairytale lands where the Princess might possibly be. It's a dangerous and arduous journey, with dark forests filled with creepy crawlies, temptations galore, and above all, villains lurking in every corner. As a result of Steele’s pleas and begging, all eight members of Team Circus receive a notification for their third objective on their communicator bracelets, meaning that they can no longer refuse the offer to help. Having been through a lot worse, Team Circus happily obliges, since that also means the possibility of finding the third jewel on their journey.

And so, the set off into the fairytale lands, such as the hill with a watering well (Jack and Jill), a gingerbread house (Hansel & Gretel), a mansion made out of straw, twigs, and bricks (Three Little Pigs), and even an ice castle (The Snow Queen), all while “Holding Out For A Hero” by Bonnie Tyler plays. The music only stops via a record needle scratch once Kinger declares that they've been going in circles the whole damn time after experiencing deja vu with some of the locations, most specifically the gingerbread house that caught Pomni’s eye. Understandably, Caine is ticked off, screaming into the sky in frustration, alerting a group of fairytale characters lead by a large troll with an apparent Scottish accent, a girl wearing a red hood, and a beast wearing a golden crown and a tattered suit, who is carrying a jewelry box with him. The red hooded lady asks if there seems to be a problem, to which Prince Steele replies yes in a quick manner, hyperventilating about the missing princess.

The trio are not happy because of their disdain for royalty after they somehow got banished for no apparent reason, as the bridge troll exclaims. The beast prince reveals that he had tried to rescue a princess once, but doesn't specify further details even when Pomni asks. When Jax frets over getting lost again (out of mostly exasperation, of course), diplomat Pamela teleports a map of the fairy-tale lands, where supposedly they'll be able to rescue the princess, and hopefully not get lost. “You mean to tell me this whole time you HAD A MAP!??!?” Caine yells out.

But before the overwhelmed ringmaster could get mad further, the map projects the locations in which they'll need to cross in order to rescue Princess Purity: The Blackberry Forest, Wonderland Lane, The Cave Of Covetousness, Mermaid Lake, and lastly, The Princess Tower (convenient naming there, eh?). The others are understandably frustrated by the cliche naming of where the princess could be held hostage. Before they could start their journey, Stumpulot introduces Team Circus to the new trio as Lynnard the Bridge Troll, Red Riding Hood, Prince Draught, and lastly, the Genie Of The Box, who is currently taking a nap in their cozy safe space that beast prince is carrying with him. Without further hesitation, Team Circus, Stumpulot, Prince Steele, and their new allies set a course for the Princess Tower, where Steele’s newfound love will be rescued.

As Team Circus heads off to their first location, each of the new allies have a pleasant conversation with the members of Team Circus, who all explain their own backstories to the fairytale friends, who in turn explain their backstories to the others, as well as Steele and Draught getting along splendidly. Kinger and Caine are also having a personal conversation of their own, having overheard Steele’s love story to Draught in the commotion, and the latter expressing suspicions to Prince Steele as he's not entirely too keen on the idea of love at first sight, despite Bubble’s interjection of the contrary (the sentiment antivirus software had indeed fallen in love at first sight himself), claiming that just because Caine doesn't believe in love at first sight, that doesn't no one else should believe it either. Before the conversation can progress further, they arrive at their first hurdle: The Blackberry Forest.

Yup. The Blackberry Forest is your typical scary dark forest seen in fairytales! It's pitch black in there, if it weren't for the flashlight feature on Pomni's communicator bracelet. Stumpulot warns the others of man-eating creatures known as Deermen and that any sudden noise could alert them to any “fresh meat”, recalling a time when he and his unnamed brother were playing around in the forest, only to get almost killed by one of the Deermen after they were being too loud that day. At first, they all try to remain as quiet as possible, with the occasional stepping on a twig, tiny yelps in fear, or even a simple gust of wind, until Prince Draught trips on a tree root, yelps out over dropping the jewelry box, alerting a Deerman of the group's whereabouts. As Prince Draught tries to find the jewelry box in complete darkness, Team Circus, Stumpulot, Red Riding Hood, and Lynnard, try to dodge the Deerman’s attacks, before Prince Draught decides to use his beast form to defeat it and protect his buddies, all while everyone tries to escape the forest. Ragatha finds the jewelry box while Jax finds a small ray of light, which leads out of the forest. As everyone else escapes, Prince Draught is seemingly lost to the Deerman. However, they have no time to grieve before they venture off to Wonderland Lane, albeit still in shock over the ordeal.

Wonderland Lane is, for lack of a better term, brain aneurysm-inducing, as its confusing twists and turns lead them to different areas of Wonderland Lane, from a mad hatter’s tea party, to a white rabbit’s house, to singing and talking flowers, and ultimately a rosebush that's been painted red. Pomni has already been accustomed to getting lost in liminal spaces, and thus is good at finding a way out of particular mazes, especially the whacky and colorful ones like this, for example. Caine, Kinger, and Bubble are struggling to get through the painted rose bushes, Jax and Ragatha are forced to participate in a tea party of craziness, hosted by the Mad Hatter and a talking hummingbird (instilling deja vu from Jax and Ragatha), Gangle and Zooble are navigating their way through a multicolored dog park (Gangle gets distracted by the cute puppies as a result), Pomni and Stumpulot are forced to escape a corridor of doors with doors (doorception) after attempting to ask for directions from a white hare, and Lynnard, Prince Steele, and Red are dragged into a flower concert, where it turns out the flowers are tone deaf. This is all while “One Little Slip” by Barenaked Ladies from Disney’s Chicken Little plays. But eventually, they all reunite, but not without falling into what appears to be a similar-looking rabbit hole from the Alice in Wonderland story they just witnessed, where it promptly leads to them getting trapped to their next location, the Cove of Covetousness.

Bubble complains exasperatedly that the map is stupid, just as everyone realizes that they lost the jewelry box. Once Caine and Pomni find the box, it's slightly damaged with the encrusted gems having fallen off and being covered in mud from the ordeal. Lynnard tries in vain to warn the two not to rub the box, but it's too late; after Caine cleans off the mud, the box opens to reveal the aforementioned Genie Of The Box, saying this introductory line: “Good morning, Vietnam! …Wait, this isn't Vietnam.”

Yeah. It turns out that the reason why the Genie was kept in stasis was because of how annoying she is. And this goes on for a long time, with the Genie chatting up a storm, as everyone else tries to find a way out of the cave. Arguments ensue from this. But before any of this escalates, the Genie points towards a door that leads them out of the treasure portion of the cave, leading everyone to stop what they're doing and realize that they were being stupid. The typical “easy solution is eventually found for comedic effect” schtick. As they walk the temple-like halls, the Genie and Stumpulot have a heart-to-heart, with the Genie's origins finally being explained to the audience as everyone else has their own conversations in the background. The cave of the Cove of Covetousness leads to an underwater section of the area that is Mermaid Lake, where, thanks to the Genie's underwater breathing bubbles that serve as helmets to everyone, they swim up to the surface and find the Princess Tower from afar, along with what appears to be a dragon.

The Genie conjures up a boat after Pomni accidentally wishes for one, before stating she has 22 wishes left. When Kinger asks why 23 wishes, Red answers that as annoying as the Genie is, she's fairly generous. Stumpulot, wanting to save what sanity is left for everyone, shuts the box, promptly putting the Genie back into stasis mode. They finally arrive at the location of the Princess Tower where Prince Steele eagerly gushes over Princess Purity's rescue. Stumpulot wonders how they'll be able to get past the dragon, but Steele recognizes the dragon as an old friend of his named Vermilla in his childhood days and the two catch up on the latest events, (much to everyone's confusion, anger, and shock as this was information that was never before revealed to them), and decides to talk to dragon, all while everyone tries and finds a secret entrance to the tower. Kinger briefly glances from behind what seems like a sinister grin, but brushes it off as yet another digital hallucination.

As the others trek their way through a cave-like corridor in the tower, they find another character who appears to be trapped in a dungeon-esque chamber. This character also appears to be of royalty, but looks strangely beaten and tattered, with a look of trauma on his face. He desperately warns them to turn back, and while Kinger, Stumpulot, Lynnard, and Red all look horrified and are convinced to leave at once, Pomni insists on continuing as they have a mission to complete. They all have completely forgotten the objective as a result of everything that went on beforehand, and as Jax tries to find a way to bail out the new character with his arsenal of keys, they find a spiral staircase that would supposedly lead to the rescue of the Princess…

…Instead it would lead them to a trap. Goddamnit. Welp, you know what they say, fool me once, shame on you. But fool me twice… damn. It's revealed that Princess Purity was never kidnapped and trapped in the tower at all and that it was all a set-up for what the princess and King were about to do. You see, when the princess was “kidnapped” the kidnapper turned out to be Prince Steele himself. Rather than getting mad, she found it rather hot that Steele would go all this way to scoop her up in his arms, take her away from her boring comfy life, and let her live a simple life away from the palace. She's essentially a careless prick who doesn't care about what's best for her people, and only cares about herself, a typical poorly written Disney princess move. Meanwhile, Prince Steele, after marrying Princess Purity, will become the next King of Medievia after King Cloudbeard enacts his genocide on all the fairytale characters. The fairytale characters were already suffering from bigotry and discrimination long before Medievia existed, and was essentially conquered land that had rightfully belonged to the fairytale characters before being taken away from them. The Queen had objected to the genocide, which angered King Cloudbeard, so he staged the hostage situation in the hopes of getting rid of the Queen, which he successfully did, knowing fully she'd protect his other expendable asset (his daughter, the Princess) so he can finally get some use out of her and enact his grand plan to make Medievia pure. And Purity was okay with all of this, because she cares about absolutely no one but herself, and had always been a spoiled brat that not even her own mom could tame. Plus, she loved her dad more, Purity claims.

And that's when King Cloudbeard emerges from the shadows, still putting on his faux happy persona, although in a much more condescending tone than anything. It turns out he had been following them from the start, using an invisibility spell on one of his signature crowns. We're treated to another flashback Prince Steele meeting King Cloudbeard for the first time, where he reveals his genocide plans to him alongside Lord Spaniel and Lady Fowl, who are actually war generals outside of public knowledge, and Prince Steele reveals that he's third in line to the throne of his own home kingdom, thus having virtually nothing of value, and has been desperately seeking a royal's hand in marriage so he can rule over his people someday. Steele had noticed moments earlier after their little duet that Purity had fallen in love with Steele and asks for the King's blessing, to which the King agrees, as he's in dire need of a public figure to turn the public's attention away from the fairytale “cleansing”.

Jax manages to finally find a key close enough to break the new character out of his cell, just in time to catch up to the others, only to find out it was all a scummy lie, when Cloudbeard, Purity, and Steele continue their villain monologue. Stumpulot, not believing for a sec who he's seeing in front of him and with tears in his eyes, attempts to rush towards Dice for unknown reasons before being stopped by Steele. Cloudbeard introduces Team Circus and the side characters to Prince Dice, twin brother of Prince Draught, with Draught having been turned into a beast after his kingdom was annexed by Medievia and his brother Dice being imprisoned in an abandoned tower ever since, to be guarded for all time by a chatty dragon named Vermilla. Another flashback shows how Prince Draught said he tried to rescue a princess once. Said princess turned out to be his older sister, Princess Purity's mom, the Queen of Medievia, who was forced into marriage by King Cloudbeard after her homeland was conquered by his Medievian army, including images of Lord Spaniel and Lady Fowl holding her hostage. This meant that Draught and Dice are Purity’s uncles, something that she herself knew since she was 12 years old, but the others didn't, mainly because of the minimal foreshadowing.

The wedding will be happening tomorrow night, Cloudbeard declares. Kinger asks angrily why they chose them of all people, to which Cloudbeard responds that they reminded him so much of those “disgusting abstracted lowlives'' that plagued his beautiful kingdom, and wanted to give them a first row seat to his conquest, out of sheer sadism and to send a warning to everyone to never cross the King. The word “abstracted” strikes a chord for all eight members of Team Circus, with them freezing up in disturbed horror and fear for their survival. When Lord Spaniel and Lady Fowl also emerge from the shadows to take the others out of the towers and throw them into the dungeon cart that Cloudbeard had drove in, Stumpulot snarls that they won't get away with this, to which Steele retorts back that they already have. As Team Circus and all the others are locked up in the cart, Pomni glimpses at Vermilla, who looks like she had no idea that any of this would happen and looks remorseful. We don't see her again until the climax.

Everyone looks forlorn and defeated, except our beloved jester herself, who is quick to point out that the Genie can get them out of there and stop the marriage, but no one responds. Pomni rubs the box again, and we are treated to the Genie saying her catchphrase for the second time: “Good morning, Vietnam!!! …Nope, still not Vietnam.”

Pomni pleads/wishes for the Genie to let them out of the cart, but when she tries, she finds that it's magic-proof. Jax tries to find a key that'll unlock the cage, to no avail. Not even Ragatha’s hairpins can unlock them. Zooble tries to use all of their strength to bend the metal bars, (only to fall apart within seconds), Gangle uses her ribbons to break them apart, and Bubble tries prying them off the cart with his teeth.

While everyone else is trying to open the cage in their own manner, Stumpulot and Prince Dice have a heartfelt talk, saying how much they missed each other, even though they’re sorry that they had to reunite like this. They reveal some minor info about each other, including the memories they used to have when they were younger, including a sweet reprise of the first song in the episode, which culminates to this…

Stumpulot reveals to everyone actually used to be a jester for the twin princes before their kingdom was conquered by Cloudbeard. This causes everyone to stop in their tracks to listen. Stumpulot says that he's the great grandson of the Pied Piper, hence why he has connections to the fairytale characters, and that the conquered kingdom in question is the fairytale lands, specifically where Wonderland Lane currently is in question. Stumpulot was there to witness the entire invasion, the capturing of Prince Draught and Prince Dice’s sister, Princess Checkers, the ensuing war, and the death of his family and even the Prince’s mom and dad. His only remnant of his family was the pipe flute his great grandpa had amongst the ruins of what used to be his home. So he ventured near and far to try to find a new one, not realizing until just now that he had wandered into the kingdom that took everything away from him, except he doesn't have the energy to be angry anymore because of what's about to happen tomorrow morning. Everyone shows sympathy for the two of them, even the menace-to-society Genie can't help but feel awful. The atmosphere becomes solemn and quiet as they can only pray for a miracle to happen.

At sunrise the next morning, we see Prince Draught, who looks like he's seen better days, having already tamed a Deerman, and trying to find his way back to the group, only for him to realize that they unintentionally left him behind thinking he was dead, although none of that matters now as he spots a dungeon cart, carrying with him his allies… and his long lost brother. He looks on in horror as his keen hearing brought to him by his beast form allows him to overhear a conversation about how King Cloudbeard’s plan to kill off all the fairytale characters is going according to plan. It's disguised as a heartwarming scene where Purity reveals that she didn't like the idea of marrying at 16 because of how young it was, but after finally finding her hero, her Prince, she can safely say that she was wrong about the whole youthful arranged marriage thing being bad because it means she gets to spend the rest of her life with Steele, and live a prosperous life without the “subhuman caricatures'' that keep getting in the way of Purity’s selfish desire for a simple life and Steele's desire for a throne to sit on.

Draught sets off back to the fairytale lands to warn them about their impending fates.

At an almost-in-ruins fairytale village Prince Draught tries to gather up as much fairytale characters as he can to rescue his allies and stop the genocide of their people. They're all angry that their suspicions have been confirmed and all set up to revolt against the King and maybe stop the wedding in the meantime. They all sing a song about how they knew it all along and how they won't let them take away what little they have left to call home. Characters include Henny Penny, Big Bad Wolf, the Three Little Pigs, Hansel and Gretel, Goldilocks and the Three Bears, Puss in Boots, Pinocchio, The Ant Queen and The Grasshopper King, Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel, even the Mad Hatter and his hummingbird assistant, the White Hare, the Queen Of Hearts and her card bodyguards, and many, many others. Prince Draught has officially rallied up an army to revolt against the system.

Meanwhile, as the rally song continues to play, after King Cloudbeard announces from his balcony to his subjects that the princess has finally chosen her suitor and that the wedding is in 15 minutes, Purity gets dressed for her big day and in a wholesome (but still evil) moment where she hugs her dad and tells him she loves him, as he walks her down the aisle, to the altar where Prince Steele is, as well as Archdeacon Bishop, who is marrying the two off for the wedding. Thousands of other Medievian citizens are seated at the wedding church benches, along with a battalion of guards to make sure nothing goes wrong, the tied up members of Team Circus, Stumpulot, Lynnard, and Red, although for some reason, the jewelry box the Genie Of The Box is sleeping in isn't even remotely secured, which Red takes notice of very well and tries to discreetly knock off the seating without anyone noticing.

Just as the song ends, Prince Draught boldly shouts that King Cloudbeard's reign of terror ends here, to which the latter responds calmly and ominously that he had expected something like this, which was why he brought company, revealing a hundred more guards from behind the altar. After an action packed scene of the fairytale characters being badass (both individually and in groups), Red finally knocks the box down, breaking it for good, prompting the Genie Of The Box to say her catchphrase one last time: “Good morning Vietn— holy moly, that's one way to crash a wedding…” Ultimately, the Genie gets the tied up folks out with her magic after Red wishes for their escape, which she happily obliges.

The civilians are unfortunately caught in the crossfire, even those who secretly opposed the King’s rules. Team Circus, Stumpulot, and the fairytale allies all try to bail out the civilians to safety, while Prince Dice confronts the King himself, which results in a dual battle while the commotion continues in the background. Meanwhile, Purity, Steele, Spaniel, and Fowl find Team Circus and promptly try to stop them, only for the fairytale allies to retaliate by brute force, eventually getting Kinger, Jax, and even Ragatha to join the fight.

Eventually, the battle ceases with a victory from the fairytale characters by a landslide, the soldiers either being injured or killed, and Dice and Draught finally reunite, with the King refusing to accept defeat as he declares that as long as he continues to sit on the throne, he will always win in the end… that is until Vermilla the Dragon breaks into the wedding altar where the King is standing, and unceremoniously eats King Cloudbeard, ensuring his permanent loss once and for all.

It's a scene reminiscent of when Sir Pentious from Hazbin Hotel was killed in an anticlimactic fashion by Adam, and Charlie awakens her ultimate form from grief as a result. Here, though, it's a parody of that, with Princess Purity running towards where her father used to be and weeping just like a Disney princess, Steele goes on to comfort Purity, with Lord Spaniel and Lady Fowl expressing sorrow for the King's death, in a saccharine parody of those sad Disney death scenes.

But just as Steele and Purity are about to sing a reprise of their “I Want” duet from earlier, Vermilla the Dragon, sick of their bullshit, just straight up eats all four of them too. At least Purity went out like a true princess. This causes Zooble and Jax to erupt into laughter from the sheer absurdity and anticlimactic manner of the whole thing, while everyone else just stares in confusion and shock.

Afterwards, Team Circus rejoices in Prince Draught’s survival after catching a glimpse of him alongside Dice, with Red, Lynnard, the Genie, and Stumpulot all having a bittersweet reunion with the long-thought-to-be-lost Prince Dice. Team Circus joins in on the reunion as they all catch up with each other as they, the celebrating fairytale characters, and the Medievian civilians walk out of the church and celebrate the end of King Cloudbeard's tyranny.

Later that evening, a wild celebration outside with fireworks ensues, with Team Circus, Stumpulot, their newfound allies, and all the other fairytale characters enjoying their newfound liberation when a faint desaturated pink glow can be found within a tree hollow behind them, which Pomni notices. She finds the source of the light and finds their next jewel, prompting all eight members of Team Circus to receive this pop-up notification:

~JEWEL OBTAINED!~

2 out of 26

Only 24 remain

The jewel is a beautiful mauve-colored Rhodochrosite.

This unfortunately means that it's time for them to leave. When Lynnard asks, “Can't they stay?”, Stumpulot replies that they're not from here and have a home to go back to. Team Circus share a heartfelt farewell with their new fairytale friends as they all get back to the Magical Digital Van, content and a little amazed with having just saved an entire nation from a tyrannical ruler — though that wouldn't have been the first time they've done so, Jax claims.

The whole journey, the mom narrator has been reading out the entire episode like a fanfic of some sorts, and as the Van drives off into the starry night, the camera zooms back out of the storybook as the mom finishes with “...and the newly freed dwellers of Medievia all lived happily ever after. The end.” The daughter exclaims how awesome the story was, which the mom agrees. The mom tucks her daughter into bed and kisses her forehead, with them both saying goodnight to each other before the mom walks out the door and turns off the lights.

When the coast is clear, the daughter promptly grabs back the book that was put away moments ago, grabs a flashlight, and rereads the book under the blanket covers, as Smash Mouth’s “All Star” replays for a second time while the credits begin rolling.

The episode ends with this In Memoriam dedication:

In loving memory of our all star

Steve Harwell

1967-2023

~~~~

Current Status:

2 Jewels have been collected

24 remain

🏰👑👸🦄💂🐸🧜‍♀️🧚🧞‍♂️

~~~~

• OG Cast

Lizzie Freeman as Pomni

Amanda Hufford as Ragatha

Michael Kovach as Jax

Sean Chiplock as Kinger

Marissa Lenti as Gangle

Ashley Nichols as Zooble

Gooseworx as Bubble

Alex Rochon as Caine

~~~~

• Audience Surrogate Cast/Diplomats

Hynden Walch as Valerie

Susan Egan as Pamela

Amy Winfrey as Garcia

Mandy Moore as Lulu

Nevaeh Hamilton (me) as Bethany

~~~~

• Background Diplomats

Andrea Libman as Winona

Cristina Vee as Patricia

E.G. Daily as Rionna

Stephanie Sheh as Olivia

Debi Derryberry as Yolanda

Cree Summer as Gemma

Ashleigh Ball as Cécelia

Erica Luttrell as Belle

Ashly Burch as Imera

Kimberly Brooks as Bailey

~~~~

• Episode’s Antagonists

Jim Cummings as King Cloudbeard

Jodi Benson as Princess Purity

Paige O’Hara as Lady Fowl

Michael Jelenic as Lord Spaniel

Aaron Horvath as Archdeacon Bishop

Ed Sheeran as Prince Steele

~~~~

• Secondary Characters Introduced

Angelina Jolie as Mother/Narrator

Vivien Lyra Blair as Daughter

Mike Meyers as Lynnard the Bridge Troll

Chloë Grace Mortez as Red Riding Hood

Nevaeh Hamilton (me) as Genie Of The Box

Jimmy “MrBeast” Donaldson as The Beast/Prince Draught

Patrick Stump as Stumpulot the Bard

Adam “SomethingElseYT” Ortiz Jr. as Prince Dice

Alan Tudyk as Mad Hatter

Melissa Fahn as Hummingbird

Rob Paulsen as White Hare

Tiffany Haddish as Vermilla the Dragon

Alex Borstein as Janiss the Room Service Lady

~~~~

[fuuka101]

(1) A Strange New World! The Awakening Of Cure Second!

[Note: This is based off of Hirogaru Sky PreCure, so you may see some scenes that are similar to the show.]

It was a sun-shinning day as always in Outernet, everyone was selling things in the markets, kids were playing in the parks, and other sorts of things going on in the lovely digital world. Then we have Second Coming Chuujiro riding on an blue and yellow eagle and looking around the city. 

"Can you please stop moving around, you'll fall off."The eagle warned him.

"Sorry, it's that the Outernet place looks so fantastic, all the people having so much fun and spreading good vibes to one another!"SC responded.

"I guess so, many other kids say."The eagle replied letting out a smile.

"You really are enjoying this ride aren't you!"The eagle questioned.

"Mmm Hmm,"SC added.

"After all, the Outernet is invincible!"SC continued releasing a huge smile.

[𝙊𝙥𝙚𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜]

{𝙎𝙪𝙗𝙩𝙞𝙩𝙡𝙚}:𝘼 𝙎𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙡𝙙! 𝙏𝙝𝙚 ��𝙬𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙊𝙛 𝘾𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙎𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙙!

𝙅𝙖𝙥𝙖𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙚:𝙆𝙞𝙢𝙮𝙤̄𝙣𝙖 𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙠𝙖𝙞! 𝙆𝙮𝙪𝙖 𝙨𝙚𝙠𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙤 𝙣𝙤 𝙠𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙨𝙚𝙞!

-At a meadow field of the Outernet with a forest nearby

The eagle was just dropping SC off at his destination where he was going and one he landed, SC got off the eagle.

"Alright kid, make sure to stay safe."He told them.

"Don't worry I will, thank you so much for the ride!"SC thanked.

"No problem kid!"The eagle replied. The eagle then jumped up and flew away off into the horizons.

"I can't believe this is the first time of me being out in Outernet on my own!"Sec told himself.

"What beautiful meadows there are!"SC replied.

SC was strolling on the meadows while picking up some pretty bloomed flowers, he kept doing it until he saw a cave with a sky blue glowing light from it.

"Huh?"SC questioned.

"What's that glowing light from that cave?"SC asked himself.

"Well, it's best I check it out so I can get my answer."SC responded.

SC then walked into the cave, it felt like a strange tunnel at first but then led him down to where the glowing light was. It revealed to be a black cat with neon blue and green glowing texture and cat like turquoise eyes, then there was a pixie like baby that with baby blue like skin with a baby clothing outfit along with a skirt in the colors baby green and baby yellow. The cat then turned to SC and he felt startled.

"Huh? W-who are you!"SC was scared a bit.

"Listen, listen, let us explain ourselves."The cat talked leaving SC even more scared.

"YOU CAN TALK!?!?"SC shouted in fear.

"Shhhhhhh! Don't let anyone else hear!"The cat warned.

"S-sorry it was just uncalled for."He replied.

"Lemme introduce myself first, I'm Digit."The female cat introduced.

"This baby pixie here is Verruca."Digit responded while pointing at Verruca who was laying down on the hard ground.

"Verruca?"Verruca said.

"Don't mind her, she's about a toddler age so she doesn't know how to say full sentences yet."Digit told SC.

"Oh alright then, nice to meet you two, I'm Second Coming Chuujiro, call me SC for short!"SC introduced himself.

"What are you two doing in this cave?"SC asked.

"Well, I'll explain to you, but you must know the whole thing."Digit told him.

"Alright then, tell me everything."SC replied.

"Well then, started the night before when everyone was asleep, a evil king and his follower came to kidnap all the pets and pixie fairies that lived here in Outernet. Me and Verruca were the only ones left so we had to hide in order to stay safe, The king was probably gonna watch over us so we hid in this cave until the time was right for us to go."Digit explained to SC and he looked shocked.

"Oh, I'm so sorry that king kidnapped all those pets and pixies, what's he gonna do with them?"SC questioned.

"I don't know, but it's not going to be good!"Digit added,

"V-verruca!"Verruca talked as she felt like she was gonna cry.

"I feel your pain Verruca."Digit responded as she comforted Verruca.

"H-hey, don't worry. Why don't you guys come with me! I promise i'll keep you two safe from that king and his follower!"SC confronted Digit and Verruca while picking them both up.

"Y-you will?"She asked and SC nodded.

"Thank you so much!"Digit cried in joy.

"Verruca!"Verruca also shouted her name!

Sometime later, SC was just taking Digit and Verruca out of the cave but just then some clouds started to cover up the sun with a little bit of lighting flashes.

"Huh? Why are the clouds covering up the sun?"Digit questioned.

"I dunno, the weather said it was going to be sunny all day."SC answered with a confused look on his face.

"Verruca! Verruca!"Verruca spoke.

"Verruca said let's go check it out."Digit told SC.

"Alright then."SC replied as he started to run all the way to the city.

Once he got there, SC was shocked because there were people screaming and running for their lives while there were Kimsubots turning people into stone statues. 

"W-what did I just walk into!"SC questioned.

"That must be the king and his follower causing chaos here!"Digit answered quickly.

"Verruca!"Verruca squealed as she started to tear up again.

"That's not good, what do we do!"SC started to panic.

"Let's hurry to the castle, that must be where everyone is for safety!"Digit responded.

"Ok!"SC commented.

SC started to run again all the way to the castle where everyone else might be and while he was doing that many people were screaming and turning into stone while some we're hiding and got found by the Kimsubots and there were the guards fighting them but they were sadly too weak and eventually got turned into stone statues.

SC managed to get to the throne room of the castle while the virus was slowly chasing him but soon started to pick up the pace and Alan was there slowly panicking that almost everyone has become stone statues.

"Excuse me!"SC called as he knocked on the door after he opened it.

"Oh phew, there's one more citizen who hasn't been turned to stone!"Alan was relieved.

"Your honor, what's going on!"SC quickly asked.

"I'm afraid the king and his follower have come and started a war on our turf!"Alan explained.

"What are we going to do!"SC questioned.

"Well there's only one thing I can do for you."Alan said.

"SC, you know why your name is Second Coming. It's because your the second chosen one, meaning your known as one of the strongest human beings here."Alan added.

"In order for you to be safe, I'm going to send you to earth so that way the king won't know where you are."He continued.

"And for you two."Alan commented as he looked at Digit and Verruca.

"If the king knows you two are on earth with SC, I have an important task for you both. I need you two to recruit magical warriors who can fight alongside us to help protect Outernet and the planet."Alan explained.

"They're known as the legendary warriors, the pretty cure."He added.

"And same thing with SC, you two must stay safe along with him,"He continued.

"Don't worry your honor, we won't let you down!"Digit commented.

"Verruca!"Verruca shouted.

"Alright then."He responded until they heard the sounds from the hallways meaning the king is getting closer.

"We don't have much time, hurry, I'll open a portal for you to go through!"Alan replied.

Alan then opened a portal which led to earth, SC jumped through the portal and after it closed.

A little while later, SC just came out of the portal along with Digit and Verruca. He was floating in the sky above a city but then...

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"SC screamed in fear as he was falling to his "death".

A minute earlier, the city was pretty and blue, there were cars driving or starting their engines, people getting to work, dropping off their kids to daycares, or some people out for walks of the pretty forecast. At an outdoor pet shop, there was a Red stick figure shopping for some parrot food.

"Hmm, which should I get? Unsaturated parrot food? Or zero sugar parrot food?"Red was having a hard time making his decision.

"Ah! Maybe I can let the parrots decide! That outta work!"Red answered. Just then Red started to hear a bit of screaming and then looked up noticing SC falling.

"Hey! Move aside!"SC warned Red, the two males were both panicking and Red didn't move out of the way he was just too scared and too shocked at the same time.

Just then Verruca's jewel on her forehead glowed green and then SC glowed in a green color as he started to slow down, after he landed softly on the ground while he stopped glowing green and he caught Digit and Verruca.

"Verruca!"Verruca shouted.

"Thank you so much for saving my fall Verruca!"SC thanked.

"Verruca!"Verruca commented.

"She said your welcome."Digit corrected and SC smiled. SC then noticed Red and his face was very confused and then...

"Ack! I'm so sorry for that chaos moment! I must have scared you, please let me explain!"SC apologized.

"I witnessed so many things! People turning into stone! Fairies getting captured! Tons and tons of screaming and agony! Nearly falling to my death!"He added.

"Wha, where am I! What is this town!"SC freaked out but then...

"TIME OUT!"Red shouted stopping SC's commotion and the both were silent for almost a minute while car starting

"Let's start this over, I'm Red Shimizu."Red introduced himself

"Nice to meet you Red Shimizu, I'm Second Coming Chuujiro."SC also introduced himself.

"I'm Digit and this is Verruca."Digit introduced herself and Verruca.

"Verruca!"Verruca said happily.

"Where did you use come from anyway, you just fell out of the sky?"Red asked.

"It's a long story."Digit answered.

"Well, I'm from this world, or more specifically a dimension. It's called Outernet!"SC answered.

"That seems like a cool place,"Red replied.

"Mmm Hmm, it's a world all about Internet and Digital Citizenship!"Digit commented.

"So, now that I'm here what should we do now?"SC questioned but just then the 4 of them heard screaming coming from somewhere.

"What was that!"Red asked.

"That might have came from a place,"SC answered.

"Over there!"Digit shouted as she was pointing at a place with trees and there was a ton of smoke.

Good eye Digit!"SC complimented.

Both of them started running to where the noise was coming from and once they got there, there was a huge royale purple and dark mint green giant monster causing chaos, at the sky there was a person floating. It was a Purple stick figure wearing evil dark ripped up clothing in a Prince style along with a pair a dark purple wings on,

"Yes Kimsubot! Cause all the chaos an destruction so we can collect more Outernet magic!"The stick figure commanded.

"KIMSUBOT!!!"The Kimsubot shouted and stomped his feet multiple times.

"Wait that monster looks familiar."SC questioned.

"What is that thing!"Red panicked.

"Red, that's a Kimsubot! One of the monsters that attacked Outernet earlier!"Digit answered.

"And who's that up there?"SC asked.

"That's Patience! The Kings prince!"Digit answered.

SC then had a moment to himself that he was known as one of the strongest human beings and didn't want anyone to suffer."I...I can't let this slide."SC quietly talked and Red managed to hear.

"Huh?"Red asked.

"Red, please hold Verruca and Digit,"SC told him.

"Ok but what are you gonna do?"Red questioned.

"Taking a stand!"SC replied.

SC then ran over to the Kimsubot who was about to hurt someone until SC called out to it.

"HEY! STOP RIGHT THERE!"

"Kimsubot?"The Kimsubot was confused.

"Huh?"Patience questioned as he and the Kimsubot turned around to see SC.

"Who the heck are you, can't you see I'm trying to cause chaos here!"Patience complained.

"Why are you and your huge monster hurting everyone here, it's not the right thing to do!"SC confronted.

"And why are you complaining...wait"Patience replied as he looked closer at SC and noticed he's one of the citizens in Outernet.

"Wait a minute, Your from Outernet!"Patience found out.

"Kimsubot! Get him so we can bring him back to Viralandia!"Patience commanded.

"Kimsubot!"The Kimsubot roared as was about to nearly kill SC.

"You attacked my family, you attacked my world, you attacked the people here..."SC told them.

"I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU THIS!!!"SC shouted. Just then a huge light that nearly blinded Patience and the jewel on Verruca's forehead started to glow. SC was glowing in a orange color while floating in the air.

"Ugh! What is this light!"Patience angerly asked.

"What the heck, what's happening!?"SC questioned.

"Hooray! SC your a pretty cure!"Digit congrats him.

"Verruca!"Verruca shouted in joy.

"I-I am!"SC wondered.

"You sure are!"Digit told him.

"Verruca!"Verruca squeaked as the jewel on her forehead glowed more and suddenly a orange light came out of it coming towards SC and the orange light landed on his hand and turned into a mirror looking pad

"What the, what is this?"SC asked.

"That's a Stickfigure Mirror,"Digit answered.

"Cool, what do I do with it?"SC asked again.

"You just shout Mirror Minor and it will start glowing and then just shout Precure, Silhouette Captive!"Digit explained and SC gave a determined face.

"Well I'm not going to let this slide, I'll do it!"SC replied. SC landed on the ground and stopped glowing and Verruca and Digit also landed softly landed next to Red.

"*takes a deep breath* here goes nothing."SC told himself. SC's body minus his head was now glowing in a orange color as well as his clothes disappeared.

"Mirror minor!"SC shouted as he pressed the button on mirror and it started to glow in an orange color. "Pretty cure, Silhouette Captive!" SC shouted again as he drew a circle and he began to transform.

SC spun around multiple times while moving and then he reached his arms out as they got covered in an bright Orange ribbon making SC's gloves appeared and bracelets on his wrists then a light going towards the middle of SC's chest turning into a broach and then the light spread threw his chest making his top appear. Then at SC's hips the light circled around and turned into shorts with a waist caps going down to almost the back of his knees. He then stepped onto the ground making his pastel green boots with anklets that were the same as his bracelets along with his long socks coming. His orange and green colored earrings appeared and pastel green halo appeared creating his accessory appear, after he put his Stickfigure mirror in a pouch on the left side of his hips then it closed and he landed on the ground.

"The stick figure of Illustration and leadership! Cure Second!"SC shouted as he struck a pose.

Red and Patience were both extremely shocked of how SC transformed into a pretty cure.

"C-cure Second?"Red talked.

"Woah, I became a pretty cure...Cool!"Second spoke.

"What, h-he's a pretty cure! That's impossible!!!"Patience also spoke while raising an eyebrow.

"Oh everything is possible with determination!"Second corrected him.

"Ugh! F*ck this! Kimsubot get him!"Patience commanded with anger.

"Kimsubot!"The Kimsubot roared and started going towards Cure Second.

"Oh crap, how do I fight?"Second whispered to himself."I'll just have to figure it out on the way."He sighed. Second jumped up and managed to dodge the Kimsubot's attack and then did a leapfrog move on it causing the Kimsubot to move around but almost fall down.

"Kimsubot?"The Kimsubot was confused on where did Second go but really...

"You hoo! Down here!"Second called as he was revealed to be on the bottom of the Kimsubot and it picked up it's foot.

"Kimsubot!"The Kimsubot was scared.

"Hey, we've got pretty good landscapes here, why don't you say we have a little spiny ride!"Second told it. Second started to spin the Kimsubot in circle's multiple times.

"HaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAA!"Second shouted as he then let go of the Kimsubot causing it to fly all the way to some trees and the Kimsubot screamed.

"Wow, I didn't know I could do that!"Second told himself.

"That's because your a pretty cure!"Digit told him.

"Ok, what do I do before it gets back up?"Second asked.

"You use your attack, just touch your stick figure mirror and draw something on it, then you'll be able to use your attack."Digit explained to him.

"Alright got it!"Second answered. He then took out his stick figure mirror and then drew a circle on it then the glowing circle came out of the mirror in front of Second.

"The spirits of the Outernet, awaken your heart!"Second said as a green and orange colored pen appeared and Second grabbed it and then once again drew a four pointed star.

"Pretty cure! Second Celestial!"Second shouted as green star became a beam and blasted straight towards the Kimsubot.

The Kimsubot didn't say anything and it turned back into it's object which revealed to be a cat plushie and everything that got wrecked turned back to normal.

"No! No no! Grr forget this, I'll just take you on another day. Later retard!"Patience insulted Second as he disappeared back to Viralandia.

"You did it Second!"Red complimented him as he ran over it Second.

"Heh, yes I did!"Second responded.

"Verruca!"Verruca replied.

"Who knew I could be a pretty cure!"Second told himself. Second then transformed back into his normal self, then he suddenly passed out and fell but Red managed to catch him.

"SC, SC!"Red cried hoping he didn't loose his consciousness.

"He must have passed out!"Digit said.

"Verruca?"Verruca questioned as she went over to SC's chest and heard it meaning he's still good.

"Verruca!"Verruca answered.

"Verruca said he's still breathing so he's good, must be sleeping."Digit told Red.

"Ok then, I should take him to my house so he can regain his conscious."Red told himself.

Red then carried SC all the way to his house and some people were looking at them thinking Red and SC are dating when they're not.

(End)

Word count: 2753

Next Episode: 𝗔 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗹𝗱! 𝗔 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗛𝗼𝗺𝗲!

[hannahhasafact]

Just finished the One Piece live action show and here are my thoughts as someone who has never read the manga/watched the anime but has been adjacent to the fandom for years:

I now get why people like Luffy so much! What a charming guy he is, and the guy they cast for him is such a delightful lil guy

Tbh, I now see all the things that people have talked about liking from this series. It’s got some charm

Also just gotta say I love that literally people will be like “where is luffy” and the people go “nope not gonna rat him out he’s a good boy”

As someone who has read many shonen manga, it’s extremely apparent that this comes from a shonen manga and it’s very funny

Like when character will just repeat a phrase multiple times into the air? Oh man I can immediately visualize that in manga form lolllll

For all of the vague knowledge I have of One Piece, I have never heard of this little dude with the pink hair in my entire life I’m sure he’s in the manga considering he’s got the over the top character design traits this series tends to love but you’re telling me this dude has been in the series the whole time? Wat

From what I’ve seen of the manga/anime, they did a really good job nailing down Sanji’s ridiculously fwippy fighting style

Ngl I thought the other straw hat dude was Luffy’s brother but I guess that’s another character? No clue

The accents are all over the place and it’s very funny like the rich girl has a British accent and the poor kid has an American accent even though they grew up in the same city? That just made me laugh

Tumblr did an AWFUL job at marketing this show lollll like Buggy is the “main” villain for like a single episode

If they continue with this show I hope to god they figure out an okay way to animate that little deer guy because I’m sure that would get real awful real quick those snail things were horrifying enough

This show is full of just beautiful people what the heck

Anyways, thought it was fun! Still not gonna read the manga or watch the anime, but I’ll watch more episodes of the live action if they do more ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[lilyclawthorne]

Top 5 TOH episodes?

5. Understanding Willow.

I love love loved the whole concept of the way memories and the mind works in the TOH universe. Was cool to see Amity and Willow’s past with each other, and have them start to clear that up. I really like how they let Willow set boundaries as well, that it wasn’t just okay everything’s fixed now, and that’s it okay to want to be friends again but still take the time to build that trust.

4. Hollow Mind.

What can I say? I wasnt joking when I said I liked how the mind worked in this show. Plus lots of backstory and plenty is revealed here. Luz finds out the truth about Belos/Philip, we learn about the golden guards, we start to see how the day of unity is gonna work, and we see the collector and what his business with Belos is. Also the scene where the first tried out the coven marks? Rare cartoon moment that actually makes me feel disturbed.

3. Agony of a Witch.

I remember being SO shocked by Lilith’s reveal, and then thinking “duh OF COURSE it was her”. I mean damn, her name means night monster she was literally the monster that cursed Eda in the night. And honestly I love it when reveals are like that? Like, just being able to go back and see the hints that led to it. Also Eda and Liliths fight?? Fucking amazing. Beautiful animation and It very much highlights just how insanely powerful Eda is, and also just how much she has come to care for Luz over the course of the whole season.

2. Keeping Up A-fear-ances.

I! Love! Clawthornes! I loved Gwen’s intro, and how they worked through her relationship with both of her daughters. It certainly explained a lot about why Eda and Lilith are the way that they are. I also just really liked seeing how Eda really appreciated having Lilith around. There’s something that’s a bit refreshing to me in the way the show handled their relationship after Lilith left the coven and stayed with Eda? Its very clear Lilith feels guilty but also that Eda loves and cares for her sister and they just want to be back in each others lives, and that can be a thing without Eda ever having to actually say she forgives Lilith. Also was very excited to see the raven beast happen, and wish we could see it again but I doubt it will. Also night market ice cream bit was fucking funny.

1. Eda’s Requiem. Immediate first episode I thought of as soon as I saw this question. It’s a really beautiful episode imo. We get a first look at an actual rebellion group. Raine is introduced!! (As well as darius and eber, letting us a start to get a glimpse into the coven heads) we get to learn about Raine and Eda’s relationship and see that these two are clearly still so in love with each other, and how Raine doesn’t know these kids in that photo with Eda, but they will be damned if they let Eda remove herself from their lives, willing to let themself get captured for Eda’s safety. We also get to see some of the horror behind the coven marks, which was cool and made for a good cliffhanger. Also the duet?? So beautiful, gorgeous animation, and makes me cry almost every time. Also, King CLAWTHORNE. The whole episode put into perspective how much Eda grew into her role as a mother, and that was just the perfect way to confirm it and reassure her.

[dearfuturehusbandblog]

Mother's Day

Dear Future Husband,

If it's not already evident, my family is unusual.

I didn't go to nursery, kindergarten, or a normal elementary school, so I never made any of the mandatory mother's day gifts in school.

And at home we never celebrated secular holidays except for Thanksgiving because my grandparents always made it a whole family thing, where everyone would come into town and often it was the one time a year we were all together.

In fact, we so never followed the secular holidays that it was kind of a joke in our house that my mom would get gifts on father's day. (I think father's day always had the better sales or something...)

There were the odd years where we would get a small gift or card, but it was a small nod and then we'd move on with our lives.

But overall there seemed to be a disinterest in these holidays because they are all consumerism being marketed to us to sell flowers and cards and candy by Hallmark and Hershey's and other such companies. And why should we give into their whims when there's no Torah basis for any of it, it's a waste of money, and there are other ways to show someone you care about them. Right?

So color me surprised when on Sunday MotherLivelyHeart started going on about how sad she is that we never do anything for mother's day.

Like... what?

It came totally out of left field.

So we had a conversation on Sunday where she said "I don't want this to be lashon hara.... let's just say I was in a different place back then."

She later clarified that her mother basically demanded that mother's day be a whole thing, so she had a negative connotation with it. And then later on she felt like if they made a big deal out of mother's day, they should make a big deal out of father's day, but because my father was such a problem in the relationship, our home, and as a father, she didn't want to make father's day a big deal.

But now that her mother is gone and my father is not in her life, she sees all the mother's being doted on by their kids and going out for brunches and dinners and stuff and she's sad that we don't do that for her.

Except that we weren't raised to do that. BY HER. We were raised to basically abhor the stuff and to grimace at the cliche waste of money and everything. BY HER.

And now she suddenly wants us to just pretend as if that conditioning doesn't exist and make a whole big thing.

I do get where she's coming from, but at the same time, it feels like emotional manipulation.

She was like "I dunno. It would just be special to go out to eat with my children or something."

I asked her, "and go where? and eat what?" Because we're all basically on restrictive diets and can't eat restaurant food.

And she was like, "I don't know! It would just be nice!"

Like... what??

I didn't mention the emotional manipulation part, but I did speak to LilSis because she had asked me if I could get MotherLivelyHeart some flowers from anywhere since she had an issue ordering them online and the order never went through. I told her I'd see what I could do. In the meantime though LilSis also wanted me to look into a gift card to a spa so MLH could get a manicure or something. I told her I'd see what I could do.

I had to give a BigSis a ride, so I asked if she could get flowers at a store nearby to where she was and she gave me a whole "really? so because she just decided this we now have to give in to her whims?" response. I was like, she's sad, can we just do this one small thing? And she was like, I can't afford it right now. So I told her if she could even see if the store had flowers I'd run to the bank and get some cash.

She sent me pictures of some flower options and a cute card, and I figured the cheapest like $5 ones would be fine and beautiful and just what our mother would appreciate.

I gave BigSis a $20 and she brought me back like $6 in change. I was like WTF because the flowers were only like $5 +tax and she said, "well, the card was $7. I sent you a picture." Which omigod I had not seen in the photos. It's so nice how she's willing to just spend all the money I don't have on a greeting card that costs more than a dozen eggs!?!?!

Whatever.

When we got home MotherLivelyHeart was napping, so I started making dinner for myself and when I came out of the kitchen I noticed the flowers on the table and said something like "we should sign the card" and BigSis was like "yeah, it's on the table." But when I went to sign it, she had already signed it from "all your girlies" which included LilSis and LilBean. Which I was like... ok, but now there's nothing for me to sign since my name is already on it...

Weird but whatever.

After MLH woke up, our out of town, off the derech brother called. He never really talks to us, just MLH, so I have no idea why exactly he called, but they schmoozed for a bit. While they were schmoozing, she passed by the table to go into the kitchen and didn't notice the flowers or card, so I grabbed a vase and set it up nicely so she'd see it when she came out.

Which she did. And stopped MyBro mid-sentence with an "awwww! did you get me flowers!?" And he was like "what? no?" And she was like, "no, your sisters."

She then proceeded to sit down and read the card to herself except the "Love all your girlies" part.

While she was talking to MyBro.

Which made me feel so awkward that we didn't even consider asking him if he wanted us to sign his name in the first place. Not that I even signed....

So when MotherLivelyHeart finally hung up, I messaged MyBro and told him that the flowers were a whim and asked him if he wanted to contribute to the spa gift card, which he said sure and asked where to zelle. So I told him that LilSis was going to zelle me and I'd be getting the gift card and he could just send it to me.

Then on Monday I was talking to LilSis about the pricing and she said "oh, I already told MotherLivelyHeart that I'd just pay for her thing when she goes in later this week."

Which, great, because I wasn't privy to that and that's not what I told MyBro. (Not that he ever zelled anything...)

But it's like all this stupid stupidity for stupidity's sake.

I guess that driving MotherLivelyHeart to appointments, doing grocery runs for her specific requests, asking if she needs anything while I'm out, making her dinner... you know, all the little things that I don't actually have to do... none of those say "hey, I'm thinking about you and making sure you feel cared for."

A vase of flowers and a $7 card. That's what does it.

Guess I've been overworking myself all this time.

So, my Dear Future Husband, if we ever do meet and fall in love and marry, please don't think you need to do these stupid secular holiday things.

And please don't expect me to do them either.

They're stupid and expensive.

And in some cases, emotional manipulation.

Sorry, but I'm not interested.

-LivelyHeart

[jay88de]

Classism

I'll rumble here, let the words out so I can go about my day.

I'm fascinated by classism, which is a recent development, more heavily since five years ago. Certain things in my life forced me to notice it and look at it especially the times when I did not want to admit they existed. But they do and boy, is it serious.

How one lives, what one knows, who one knows, how one makes associations, how one uses language, and who one becomes friends with. When I was younger, my dad always wanted me to go to the best schools in our town or city. He'd say that was where I was to meet tangible friends, friends with a family name worth knowing, who I could call on in the future. I cannot say I made those friends in my primary secondary and high school, whom I can call on today, but I can say I got a good education, which made a lot of difference. I know it did from how I speak, and how I synthesise information; when I had difficulties as a kid, my parents got me tutors until they found the one who made all the difference, they could afford it.

Even in the same household, my brothers didn't get as much as I did. Different financial circumstances, different situations and this shows. It shows in how we think about our lives and the decisions we've made. I didn't grow up poor and I have never been poor.

I have had money issues but not poor, not destitute. I've never had to do just anything for money. For a long time, I didn't realise what a privilege this is.

I think about classism because, the older I get the greater the divide has gotten. In the small town I grew up in, most people weren't exactly middle class, but they lived comfortably. There was a social cohesion in the town that enabled people to have something to live on, no matter what they earned. I rarely saw people beg on the streets, except cripples at the main market gates. Fine, maybe my dad had more money than some of my friends but it wasn't obvious because some of those friends had everything else I had. The only difference was the size of our house or the car in the yard. This was one of the only giveaway. There were richer children in school who went on holidays in America and Europe, still, though we all wished that for ourselves, it came and went as a passing thought. No stink to it. At the end of the day, we were all fine.

Until Nigeria. Being in Nigeria was my first encounter with what it meant to not have. Not having a certain income meant, the possibility of skipping meals, not having light, no running water and literally living in a house that was falling apart. This was my experience at my uncle's house. It was a real nightmare for me. I struggled so much, not so much about not having but about how I was expected to undress my personality to fit in. I had extra money to buy bread for the family and would be scared to do it because of how it would make them feel. My little town stories were such a stretch for my cousins, that I resolved to a lot of silence until I could leave. To add, I gained so much weight because of how inconsistent meals were and how they were mainly starch. So I learned to grow a large appetite to eat whenever I saw food. The house was barely cleaned, not because there was so little time, but because it simply wasn't a priority and so much time was spent on things that shouldn't matter. Religiosity was a big part of their routine. I was there three months and I recall never wanting to experience that in my life again. To them, my father was rich. No, he isn't, maybe at some point in his life but, yes, rich is relative.

Throughout university, I learned that looking a certain way and sounding a certain way got you more favours, this is a lesson I'm keeping. My mother taught me how to eat healthy and present myself more appropriately, I quickly learned how beauty is a useful tool and then I realised I have light-skinned privileges. And this is where it starts getting tricky because wherever there is a privilege, someone or some group has to pay a price for it.

Being in London, makes me realise that we have created a society that cannot continue sustaining itself and we now have two extremes continuing a long class war. I can't say I have sat with the extremely wealthy, no, not at the pounds level but I have sat with the upper middle class, they too are on a race to the next level. I have been with men who are wealthy, not sure about pounds, I'd say dollars. Every class has its characteristics. There are prevailing mindsets, traits and discontents. There is suffering on every level and the further on the spectrum you go, the suffering gets worse on different dimensions. It becomes like a cancer, ravaging a human's body. You could look at them and think, "Why not do this, or try that."

No, they cannot. Their minds are stuck and unless they can have a hardware update, they will continue doing what they have been doing. In the end, classism serves no one. However, saying that solves nothing, we've all benefited and lost out from the class we were born into, the ones we now identify as. No two classes experience life in the same way and get this, as long as classism exists, competition will permeate the rule book of what a successful life looks like.

I maintain the happiest community I lived in was the one I grew up in where being poor wasn't glaring because not having money didn't entail bargaining with your human dignity. This community barely exist, classism, corruption and unfair resource allocation has stolen most of it.

This is really what classism is about, recourse allocation, access, the ability to choose, dignity of human life. Some people have more than they will ever need and the majority are scrapping for crumbs, in the end, we are all left disfigured by this useless fight.

I keep thinking about what I want to do with my life. I'll tell you; last and for the greater beginning of this year, I learned one thing, giving out money is not charity, it is essential. You do not do it because you are a good person, you do it to save yourself from damnation; from the slur of not having enough and needing to get more. Giving out is like the pill you need to take to stay healthy and normal. Honestly, charity connotes policing and more often than not, that's what happens, someone gives you something and then wants to see what you do with it. Or waits to see how you rejoice over it. As if...

Give it and not bother with it, whatever happens afterwards is out of your control and here's another interesting thing, people are not stupid, they usually already know what they want to do with money. Even if they fuck it up the first three or how many number of times, they will learn.

This is another mind fuck, classism and manners or financial lessons or how to say things or how to look, such bullshit all of it. Now, I can go back to studying at this rather expensive school... smh.

[musicarenagh]

Yarisho Unplugged: A Tale of Musical Evolution and Raw Emotion Yarisho started his music journey only a couple of years ago. He is from Kyiv, Ukraine. He's released three singles and rocked the live performances. His stage name, takes account of the search for peace in this life's cacophony while also hinting at Slavic mythology. In this chat, Yarisho talks about his life. He's self-taught, drawing inspiration from the small things of life, his development follows his music: from being addicted to TV-station performers, he springs onto the stage at a Kyiv festival. All is feeling in his music, leading you into a realm of emotions. James Blake and Joji are the artists that have influenced Yarisho's music, which has changed as he's grown. But outside music, he plunges into graphic design and marketing. Looking back at the hard places in his journey, he's used failures as a kick to get even stronger. Hinting at an upcoming album and keeping collabs hush-hush, Yarisho shares a heartfelt message with fans: stay true, don't forget the simple pleasures of life and pursue your dreams. Every song Yarisho spins a link and the sound of music isn't something that we just hear, it can also be felt in our lives. Listen to below https://open.spotify.com/album/0lLnNZpUg1n4xyyhx3T4Su Follow Yarisho Spotify Soundcloud Instagram Youtube Tiktok What is your stage name My stage name is Yarisho. Is there a story behind your stage name? I can’t say that I have a specific story behind my stage name, but if we are speaking about the meaning, it contains different senses. The main is “a place where you can find your calm”. Also it is consonant with Yarylo, slavic God of spring and vitality. Where do you find inspiration? Life inspires me pretty much. Although it sounds trite, you should definitely romanticize your daily life to survive in this crazy world. Any relationships, situations, people or nature can be the impetus for your art. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, inspiration in the same. What was the role of music in the early years of your life? When I was little, I was always fascinated by the artists on TV. The way they look and act on the stage. Then I became addicted to vocal shows and dreamed that one day I’ll definitely burst into the music world. Are you from a musical or artistic family? I am a guy from a regular family. My parents never played music, but they like to listen to it. Who inspired you to be a part of the music industry? Me, myself and I [laughs]. I couldn’t say that I have someone who spurred me on the music path, it was my own decision. How did you learn to sing/write/to play? I'm self-taught with no formal music training. I was learning from scratch, mainly through trial and error, and devoted all of my time to it. What was the first concert that you ever went to and who did you see perform? My first concert (if we can call it that) was at a Kyiv festival timed to the Christmas holidays. I remember it was a very cold day, kids and their parents danced below the stage. I was very worried but it was over in a flash. [caption id="attachment_53373" align="alignnone" width="1333"] My first concert (if we can call it that) was at a Kyiv festival timed to the Christmas holidays[/caption] How could you describe your music? I can sum it up in three words: emotional, sensual, engaging. Describe your creative process. Usually I begin with a short hook melody, which could suddenly come to me. Then I start to build composition around it, experimenting with the sound, taking the small steps toward the final version. And the last step is lyrics. I think I always keep in my mind what this song should be about, but the whole work with text leaves for last. What is your main inspiration? Well, like I said, this is life - love, my close and music itself. I really like to go to live performances, theaters and festivals. Cultural life inspires me as well. What musician do you admire most and why? James Blake, Sampha, Joji, Unknown Mortal Orchestra - their vision of music is close to my heart.

Did your style evolve since the beginning of your career? Sure, and it’s a common thing for young artists. At first I used to try myself in classical pop - because of music I listened to at that time. After a long break in my musical path, searching for a fresh sound and senses, I presented a new single “Take it slow”, which became the first swallow of the upcoming album. Electronic sound and new style made this song directly opposed to what I has done before. Artist worldview changes and, as a result, music changes too. Maybe I've become a more adulty adult. Who do you see as your main competitor? Actually I don’t like the idea of competition at all. We are all fighting our own battle, where the main competitor is you itself. I prefer to say I have people and artists I look up to, but I don't want to compare myself with someone. https://open.spotify.com/artist/6zFixeED5HhL77v7rnUvMZ?si=0aTTlG2cRhyZJv8LYfASMw What are your interests outside of music? Graphic design and marketing, I work in this area. If it wasn't a music career, what would you be doing? It would definitely be something connected with Graphic design. Love it. What is the biggest problem you have encountered in the journey of music? Do not give up after the first failure, as it should be seen as a further step to improve your skills. I am a very sensitive and emotional person like most artists, that's why every mistake makes me sad. No one will argue that we all want everything at once, but, unfortunately, it does not work this way. If you could change one thing in the music industry, what would it be? That's a difficult question, because there are many different aspects. I will not say anything new - fair compensation, more honesty, less predatory. What are your plans for the coming months? I’m working on my new album consisting of 9 songs — the release is scheduled for next year. Although I plan to shoot a video. Do you have any artistic collaboration plans I would like to keep it a secret. Let it be a great surprise for people who listen to my music. What message would you like to give to your fans? Never be afraid of being yourself, define your life goal which would make the greatest sense just for you and go ahead. Be patient and love what you do, avoid people who say you'll never succeed. Show gratitude for those who are kind to you and find your inspiration in simple things.

[jellimac-sims-stories]

Simfluencer

Jellimac

Your world can change dramatically overnight when you least expect it

---

Chapter 1 It happens just like they say. One night you go to bed with 4,382 followers and the next morning you wake up with 1,204,382 followers. One photo and you're a social media star!

I’m new in town. The brand new resident at 910 Medina Studios in the Arts Quarter. Just moved to San Myshuno about a month ago from Oasis Spring. Don’t get me wrong I really like my hometown. Born and raised child of the dust and sand. All this cold light and concrete is going to take some getting used to. Oasis Spring is a really great desert town strongly influenced by the rockabilly style. Everything there is Presley, Lewis, and Cash, and early rock’n’roll music playing in almost every locally owned business around town. I barely remember seeing my dad in anything other than black with an acoustic guitar by his side a la his idol Johnny Cash and my mom as his own June Carter with an equally beautiful singing voice. 

Back when I was a kid, my dad used to paint and race vintage cars and my mom was a local pin-up girl star. I loved going to the car show circuits with them looking at all the cars and art. It's gotten kinda sleepy around there nowadays. There are still the old touches around like my favorite book store called “Blue Suede” but it's all changing with the times. Things are turning more eco-friendly. 

My childhood best friend Josh and his brother Jonah both live in these converted container homes they built from the ground up. I love those boys like family. They’re both tall enough to be called tall although Josh is a bit taller than his older brother, we all have tattoos and are natural redheads but Jonah’s recently bleached his hair platinum blond. Josh is my age and we’ve been friends since pre-k. Jonah is basically like a father to both of us. He's always been there to encourage and support us both after my parents and their mom mysteriously didn't return from a car festival in Strangerville when we were all young. I lived with the two of them and their father until we all decided we had enough of his excessive drinking.

Back home I'm a local artist. Not famous or anything. That's why I picked the Arts Quarter to move to. I picked a nice little studio apartment with the bones for bohemian decor. Mixed exposed brick throughout, hardwood floor, lots of built-in shelving, and the cutest little nook for a desk. My apartment has a lot of personality but unfortunately needed a bit of TLC here and there. Sometimes a fuse blows or the pipes running through my bedroom leak but I am more than able to take care of any repairs myself. 

In San Myshuno there are four districts; Uptown, Fashion District, Spice Market, and Arts Quarter where I live. Clearly, all the uber-rich people live in Uptown or the Fashion district, and the cool people live in the Spice Market or Arts Quarter. So you can imagine my surprise when the usual welcome wagon came round my first day in my new apartment and one of my visitors was an actual celebrity...

Wanna read the rest right now? Check out the whole store on my AO3

[artist-issues]

Wow, where to start. And whether or not to bother.

You have so many points, none of which actually work together or have legs to stand on on their own. But they’re still…incorrect, so I’ll take the time to respond, not because it’ll change your mind, but because maybe it’ll help some readers who are also riled for the same “reasons” you are to think more carefully.

First off:

My blog has several posts about why the Live Action Remakes are all bad, and I dive just as deeply into Beauty and the Beast and Aladdin. The fact that recent posts are about Little Mermaid is because right now, that’s what’s in theaters and that’s what’s on my mind. So, your assumption that I’m talking about it purely because of a race issue reveal your biases, not mine. You don’t know a thing about me, my race, my gender, my socio-economic background, my life, or any of the necessary factors to decide I’m picking on the black-girl movie. Not even what I usually blog about. But with all evidence to the contrary, that’s somehow still the conclusion you come to. 🤷‍♀️ What does that say about you?

As far as magic being important to children, that’s…just not the topic of conversation in my post. Because the “fact” that it’s objective point is to “bring joy to children” is not actually a fact. It’s just your opinion. The movie is marketed to children. That doesn’t mean it’s sole purpose is to be enjoyed by them. Disney is famous for making quality films that adults and children can enjoy together. So you don’t get to decide whether or not “any meaning we decide is secondary.” If only you saying it would make it so. 🤷‍♀️ That would make your points so much better.

Truth of the matter is, the animated film already brought joy to children. Show that movie to any kid today, in a theater, and you’ll get the same wonder and joy. That’s the “magic” of the original. The new one borrows off of it cheaply. If it didn’t need the magic of the original to get any kind of positive reaction, it wouldn’t be a remake; they would’ve just done something entirely new.

Finally, which is it? Is the joy and magic so important to children and are the representation and change and past transgressions so necessary to feel strongly about? OR—Do we all need to “grow up and be so serious’ because Disney movies are for kids? Because for someone who believes the second, you sure wrote a long post.

While you’re at it, do you actually want to point out any “past writing transgressions?” Or did you already get down off of your own high horse, so it’s too late to make actual arguments of your own?

No? Well. I’ll be here if you actually want to be reasonable and base your claims off of actual arguments instead of…conflicting points, personal attacks, and your own prejudices 🤷‍♀️

And another thing.

The original The Little Mermaid is about understanding. One of the main plot devices is that the witch takes what from Ariel, ladies and gentlemen?

Her voice.

Ariel did not leave the sea “for a boy.”

Ariel left the sea to be understood. Because for the whole first part of the movie, we’re shown hints of what her life is already like, and how she’s tried to be understood but nobody’s listening or communicating.

She’s introduced by describing a ship as amazing and wonderful, while her fish friend clearly does not understand and wants to get out of there.

Even her best friend doesn’t share her love for another world.

Her first interaction with her father, count how many times he’s speaking over her.

He has this prejudice against humans, and because she’s disobeyed him, he won’t listen to any of her evidence that they may not all be bad.

Even when she has a voice and a cavern full of proof that humans aren’t all barbarians, her father won’t listen to her, so he can’t understand.

And the truth is, she doesn’t have that much proof. She knows that humans are clever and make “wonderful things,” and that’s what she bases her belief in them on. But those beautiful objects, and her pretty ideals, are not enough to make her abandon her family and culture and world.

When she sings and talks about why she wants to be Part of That World, it’s because she wants to understand it. And, subconsciously, Ariel also hopes to be understood up there. Where they make cool devices, and maybe daughters can stand instead of being reprimanded. There’s this hope for freedom and being known associated with the surface.

But it’s not until she meets Eric that those ideals are really, actually, proven true.

Ariel sees Eric out on the sea exploring instead of staying in a palace on his birthday. He gets a gift from the closest person to him, and it’s clear that even the closest person to him doesn’t understand his tastes—he doesn’t want an over-dramatic statue of himself. He sticks to his ideals in an argument that somewhere out there, is the right girl for him. But he doesn’t have to leave the argument in frustrated tears. In the end, he risks his life to not only watch out for his friend, but nearly dies going back to a burning ship to save his dog.

Eric personifies everything Ariel has always idealized about the Human World—AND he might understand her.

In her one observation of him, she finds out that he, a human, is:

A Prince, but nobody can tell him what to do.

More interested in activity and exploration than palace ceremony.

Unable to relate to his closest companions.

Handsome—beautiful, not a savage.

Criticized for “silly, romantic notions” but sticks to the idea of something wonderful out there in the great beyond.

Brave, self-sacrificial, and compassionate to animals.

Eric is, all at once, everything Ariel always hoped a human could be, and yet still so like herself. They have twin souls.

She’d rather be exploring human ships, he’d rather be out exploring the sea. She believes the surface world is good and beautiful, he believes in the girl of his dreams, no matter what anyone says. She has nobody who gets excited about new adventures, and he has nobody who gets excited about new adventures.

When she sees him, she falls in love not just with his upstanding character, or even the human world he represents—she falls in love with the hope that he might understand her in away nobody under the sea does.

Then the ironic thing is, she’s got to make him understand who she is and what she should mean to him without a voice. And unfortunately, that’s really hard because he is suddenly associating his dream girl with a voice and a magical rescue.

As close as they may get when she finally does meet him face to face and gets herself human legs, Ariel and Eric can’t be together until he knows who she is, for real. After all, how can love be true without understanding?

And we’re not DONE with understanding. Because even after he learns what and who she is and still commits to her and saves her and loves her, Ariel’s back to having a tail. She’s back to being in a world where he can’t be.

Except now, Triton is the one who understands. He finally sees what they’ll do for each other—and that Eric, ”savage, spineless, harpooning fish eater with no regard” saved his daughter. He sees that they love each other and are each worthy of the other’s love.

It’s not until Triton understands what Ariel has known and felt all along that he gives her human legs the right way.

That’s the point of Disney’s The Little Mermaid. “True love is found in understanding and sacrificing for one another.”

Triton had the sacrificing idea down, but he didn’t have understanding. Eric had understanding, but he didn’t have the chance to sacrifice for it.

Ariel has both. She understands that Eric’s world is not only barbaric, but beautiful, and she’s willing to sacrifice her tail to be understood in that world.

That is what this movie is all about. And because they’re probably willing to sacrifice critical scenes, like the Prince saving the day (which is important because it provides Triton with a new understanding of humans) or the girl leaving the ocean to be with the boy (which is important because what she really wants is to be understood) the creators of the Live Action Little Mermaid are going to miss the point and ruin the movie.

[secretsofblackthornhall]

Magnus to Alec

Dear delectable muffin of love,

I hope this perfumed letter finds you well, and that you and R and M are having an excellent time in your exotic journey to…well, I believe the term you used was “upstate.” I have heard legends of this Upstate, but never did I know that my family would see for themselves its mountains, its twee farm markets, its River of the Son of Hud.

More to the point, I hope the kids are enjoying their visit with Grandma, and I hope you are referring to Maryse as “Grandma” as often as possible because I enjoy the face she makes when we do. On a less pleasant but more urgent note, I hope you’ve had a chance to talk with Luke about the Cohort/Idris stuff.

But do not tire your beautiful hands with a written reply. I will be heading to this “Upstate” myself to join you later this afternoon, as I am relieved to report that the business with the Blackthorn kids’ cursed house is more or less resolved. Although it was touch and go, let me tell you.

I don’t think I even showed you the note Jem sent, which said, “Emma and Julian are trying not to bother you about their house, and that is very nice of them, but unlike them, I feel absolutely no compunction about bothering you, and so this is me, now, in this note, bothering you. We are in need of a warlock and you are the best one I know for this. We would all really appreciate your help.”

As is often the case, I was both mildly annoyed and mildly impressed with Jem, who managed to be both very kind and also to remind me that I am a sucker when it comes to him and Tessa and will rush to their aid when I can. Because I am a sucker when it comes to him and Tessa, I wrote back quickly saying I would come.

I know what you’re thinking: “How could Tessa need a warlock when she is a warlock?” But different warlocks have different expertises, as you know, and while Jem was flattering me that I was the best choice, the reality is that I have dealt with a lot more curses than Tessa. That’s what comes of spending the past decades hiring your services out to any miscreants who come by, instead of more intelligently living a calm life as a magic researcher in the Spiral Labyrinth. Tessa always was the smartest of us.

Anyway, I must give Emma and Julian credit. I expected to arrive and find them banging the cursed objects against one another or something, but they had set up a decent enough protective circle and even found a spell. It was an old, kind of generic spell that I have found to rarely be of much use with actual curses in the modern day, but still.

Rather stupidly I set up a basic workaday curse-breaking circle of my own, and gave it a try. “Stupidly” because I had forgotten who did the curse in the first place. Your worst ancestor, Benedict Lightwood, all-around demon enthusiast and dilettante necromancer. How in bed with demons was Benedict? He literally died of demon pox — which if you do not know, because you are beautifully pure, my Alec — is a sexually transmitted demon disease.

But I forgot that in the moment, so I was surprised when the curse put up an impressive resistance. It writhed and thrashed and struck out, like Max being lowered into a bath. The cursed objects were all glowing, kind of neon green, where they were tied to the magic, and eventually I realized I was going to have to carefully unknot each object from the curse, one at a time.

I managed the flask, the dagger, and one of the candlesticks (don’t ask me to explain how THAT happens), but after that I was stuck.

It’s not a great look for a warlock to strike a big magic pose and then nothing happens. I am sure I looked ridiculous, like a mundane magician who couldn’t understand why the rabbit wasn’t coming out of the hat. Julian and Emma are very polite and only waited patiently but I felt quite silly.

And then I lost all my focus temporarily because the door opened and Kit walked in. He sort of looked around at the scene and finally said, “Professor Plum in the library with the candlestick, I see.”

“Purple is always an appropriate color for a warlock,” I said. “It is the decorative color of magic.”

Emma, of course, said, “Your magic is blue,” because she is an inveterate smartass.

“Maybe he meant me,” said Julian. “I’m wearing a purple hoodie. Also because it is the decorative color of magic,” he added with a nod in my direction, which I appreciated.

“Maybe you could put the objects on a purple tablecloth instead of a white one,” Kit said, and while he was talking he walked out to get a closer look.

And when he got close to the circle, Alec, I felt the strangest sensation. A feeling of…power, I suppose, kind of humming in Kit. You know the way your body kind of vibrates when there’s a really really low sound? That rumbling feeling? It was like that, but silent. I’ve never had that experience any of the times I’ve seen Kit before. I could also tell that Kit didn’t feel anything unusual. Or if he did, he was surprisingly casual about it.

So I suggested he come join us around the circle and add his focus to the magic. “Especially since Jem and Tessa have snuck off somewhere rather than helping out with this round.”

“They’re out in the garden with Mina,” Kit said, a little defensively.

I redirected everyone’s attention to the objects and established a somewhat souped-up version of my go-to curse breaker. I went for the other candlestick and BANG. No resistance anymore! There was a big burst of blue and all the knots of magic tying the objects to the curse broke into pieces.

Everyone blinked a bunch. Eventually I said something like, “Well, that was more what I was hoping for. I guess four people made the difference.”

I checked. The curse seemed…gone. I was actually a little shaken. I haven’t mentioned it to Tessa and Jem, because I don’t want to make a big deal of it, but I think it worked because of Kit. Not because we needed a fourth person. Something is going on with him, some magic that is totally outside his awareness. I assume it has something to do with being a descendant of the First Heir, but I’ve never been an expert on that kind of faerie enchantment. (And do burn this letter, after you get it — very few of us know about Kit being the First Heir, and it’s best if we keep it that way.)

It makes me sad to think of it. Kit is a good kid who deserves a good, ordinary life. I know that’s what Jem and Tessa want for him, more than anything, after the chaos that was his growing up. But I am not sure he will have a choice in the matter. Fae may not let him choose.

Julian reached out and took hold of the flask. He held it for a moment, frowning.

“What?” said Emma.

“Nothing,” Julian said. He looked up at me. “Is that it? No more curse?”

“No more curse,” I said. “I hope.”

And then down from the ceiling drifted Rupert the Ghost. I never met Rupert Blackthorn when he was alive. I don’t know what to think of him. On the one hand, he seems to have been an innocent who was in the wrong place at the wrong time, a spirit trapped in a house he never lived in because of evil he never knew about while he lived. On the other hand, he met Tatiana Lightwood and thought that lady seems like marriage material, so there must have been something weird going on with him.

Rupert had been hovering and he descended until he was right above the table. He was staring at something on it.

“What is it, Rupert?” said Emma. “What are you looking at?”

Kit followed his gaze and started pushing the objects out of the way. “It’s the ring,” he said.

Emma said, “What ring?”

Indeed, what ring? There wasn’t a ring among the cursed objects. But there was a ring on the table now. Kit picked it up. It was a silver ring, etched with a design of thorns and set with a black stone.

“Blackthorn family ring?” Kit said.

“It’s not how family rings usually look,” Emma said.

“Wedding band?” said Kit.

“Shadowhunters don’t use wedding rings,” said Emma, but Julian had that thoughtful look he gets.

“I am bound here by a silver band,” he said softly.

“Shadowhunters can exchange wedding rings,” I said. “They just aren’t expected to. But they can if they want.”

Whatever it was, it was Rupert’s. He had followed Kit’s hand as it picked up the ring, and now he was reaching out for it with a thin ghostly hand. He wrapped it around the ring, which did absolutely nothing since he’s a ghost – Kit just kind of held it there for him. Then his eyes closed (Rupert’s, I mean) and he got this expression on his face of relief and gratitude and peace, and he just…faded out, right there. Just slowly vanished and was gone. No more Rupert. On to hopefully not being reunited with his wife, since she was also his jailer for over a hundred years.

“He didn’t even say goodbye,” Emma said quietly.

“That’s for the best,” I said. “He was never supposed to be here at all.”

“Well, Rupert, if you can hear me,” said Emma, “it was nice being haunted by you.”

“Five stars,” said Kit solemnly, putting the ring back on the table. “Would be haunted again.”

And all the candles went out in the room at once. Which, if it was Rupert, was a nice touch. Though it may have just been a draft.

We all filed out of the room quietly. “It’s different,” Julian said. He was looking around at the hallway. “I can feel it already.”

I could feel it as well. There was a lightness that had not been there. A kind of pleasant hominess that a good house conveys and that had always been absent from Blackthorn Hall in the time I’ve known it. It’s hard to describe, but all at once it felt like Julian and Emma’s home, in a way it hadn’t before. I’ve always known it as a forbidding place, and then as a hideous ruin, but for the first time I thought, this was a place the Blackthorns could fill with joy.

And I’m certain they will.

See you very soon, my love. I shall kiss you until a toddler forces us apart to pay attention to him. So plan for a kiss of about 30-60 seconds, based on previous experience. But I wish, as always, that it could be endless.

Love,

Magnus

[thepaininurneck]

Okay, wow, never in my life did I think a music video involving giving Satan a lap dance would delve into a conversation about gay rights ( and how gay men are portrayed in media ), but Lil Nas X broke the world with MONTERO, so here I am. We’ve got three things here that I think are important - Internet culture, religion, sexuality. These are the things that I think people are getting too uptight over/not upset enough over, and I wanna rant for a bit, so bear with me on this one.

First, I LOVED MONTERO. I’m a whore for religious imagery/theming/etc. being used in media, and as a former Christian and an openly gay woman, it makes me very happy to see it used in a spiteful manner. MONTERO was gorgeous - sexual, unapologetic, and so clearly pulling straight from Biblical stories. The religion used commonly against us ( here in the US, at least, because I know other religions can be just as oppressive, if not worse, and Christianity isn’t the dominant religion everywhere ) being used in a way that’s expressive of our lives is beautiful. The very clear message of “Oh, I’m going to hell? That’s okay,” is perfect - for so many LGBT people in this country, we’ve been told that we’re condemned to eternal punishment because of something we can’t help. LNX took that in stride and made it art, with MONTERO and the video. I am in full support of it and will be throwing it on my horny playlist.

But here’s why I think this is so important - MONTERO’s release has exposed, in my opinion, where the real issues lie in Western culture. WAP did this too, a little - both of these songs, and their accompanying videos, were criticized using children. “Children watch you”, “how could you expose kids to this”, etc. were complaints hurled at Cardi B and LNX over their music. And in LNX’s case, people used his previous success with Old Town Road - I saw one tweet saying Old Town Road is “every kid’s anthem”, and that their children love Old Town Road. Which is problematic - how can you complain about MONTERO, but allow your child to listen to a song with lyrics such as “Lean all in my bladder”, “Cheated on my baby, you can go and ask her”, “Bull riding and boobies” - Old Town Road is not a child-friendly song by any means, but LNX didn’t include naked breasts, or ( as far as I’m aware ) market the song in a way that showcased those lyrics. So parents let their children enjoy their funny horse song, never looking into the words their kids were hearing daily. But with MONTERO, because they saw at a glance that it was an issue, they assumed this meant the previously “child-friendly” artist LNX, the man behind the funny horse song, was suddenly trying to indoctrinate their children. When in reality, LNX has never catered to kids. He’s always been open about his music and himself, and it’s entirely the parents’ faults for not better monitoring what media their children take in. It is never the responsibility of the creator to change their content for an audience they didn’t want. MONTERO, and WAP, both exposed just how internet culture has allowed parents an excuse to be lazy, hands-off pieces of shit, and demonize creators further.

MONTERO also exposed how homophobia continues to follow us, in how many comments there were calling LNX predatory, claiming he was indoctrinating children and pushing agendas - and, with Kaitlin Bennet’s actual racist comments, now he’s being slandered. ( if you didn’t see that beef, TLDR: Kaitlin asked “do you still see your dad?” w/ blatant intent to hurt, LNX replied with “yeah and I’ll fuck yours”, to which Kaitlin accused him of threatening to rape her father and several small, conservative ‘journalists’ ran with it ). I don’t like throwing around the word homophobia, but this isn’t new - gay men have been called predatory for a long time and demonized for even small gestures like holding hands. And now, an openly gay man made a video celebrating his sexuality ( which isn’t a new topic: look at any music video from the early 2000s for more examples of people expressing sexuality ) and given fuel to these idiots to continue pushing their narrative of “gay man predator, gay man bad”. Fortunately, it’s a lot less than it would’ve been thirty years ago. But the fact that it still happens on this scale, enough that journalists pick it up as a story, and governors, Candace Owens and other prominent homophobic conservative figures jump on the bandwagon....it’s sad. A man celebrating his sexuality shouldn’t be demonized the way it is, and MONTERO is doing an amazing job at spitting in people’s faces.

Cutting myself short here, I think MONTERO was a gift. It’s a work of art in many ways, but the social response it generated is also a blessing in that it shows what we need to prioritize - which is self responsibility. No one is forcing you to watch the gay man give Satan a lap dance, nor are they forcing you to buy his shoes. No one will ever force you into that - you, a consenting adult/teenager, willingly watched it. You’re reading this now of your own choice. If your child is watching MONTERO, you should blame yourself if you’re mad - why didn’t you monitor them better? Teach them to avoid things they don’t recognize online? You failed as a parent to protect your child from what you deem harmful. That isn’t anyone’s fault except your own as their active guardian.

Sex, talking about sex, grinding, lap dances....those aren’t new to music videos. They’ve been happening for decades, actually - early 90’s and 2000’s videos had a lot, and I think some 80’s had them. MONTERO didn’t invent NSFW music videos, the only difference is it’s gay and dared to use religious imagery ( which also isn’t new, but that’s another rant I don’t want to get into ). For once, I actually agree with the masses - this outrage was mostly fueled by homophobia and dumb Christians. And to any Christians reading this ( that didn’t get offended, because if you got genuinely upset by this drama, fuck you ); you’re cool.

Anyways, yeah. I think MONTERO was awesome, LNX killed it as always, and I hate conservatives. Goodnight.

[a-drop-of-nightshade]

“I learnt some things before hand on my own that helped me, he was very confused about it all but his priority was making sure everyone survived, everyone won and everyone got out as best he could. Back at camp I always found ways to keep team morale up I showed them drinking games and other things to try and make everyone stay mentally capable. If you’re too serious and tense for too long it breaks you, I knew that because I was already broken at that point. Your daddy even gave me his protoRIG to survive, everyone looked like they shit breaks when I didn’t scream and all you could hear was my spine being snapped into place and straight.” He snickered. He looked at her, “Although honestly living with you as a kid is definitely enough to give anyone a few grey hairs, I got stuck with the lotta them. I swear Alice ain’t human.” He grumbled eyeing you the unconscious soldier across the room.

Skull looked at her, “Yeah I had the same, it wasn’t until after the war Cassie told us about him when I had an episode and Alice was trying to get me through it.” He remarked, “Turns out the one who does it to us throws us into places where a certain energy masks us and it leaves us to suffer, it hides us from Cinder or else he would have immediately come and got us fixed. Unfortunately the goal of said cunt such is to have us suffer and die, preferably as painfully as he can get from us.” He muttered watching her rub Lost’s back who was curled up contently and so peacefully in her arms. He chuckled, “Yeah, she was raised by your daddy and one of my alters, things can happen very differently in some universes.” He said softly, “But Fighter gave her a bit of a vicious streak at times, then again Fighter is literally the head of the underworld and runs the black market, sets guidance for basically the entirety of all cartels and gangs and is a very famous cage fighter.” He explained and then looked thoughtful, “She gets what she wants because Glitch is not a being to mess with, even Cinder and Fox are cautious around him… But things always happen for a reason, just chat to her and I’m sure she’ll help you figure things out. Oh just let her know I’m here too, she knows who I am we met once.”

He grinned at her as she puffed out her cheeks and looked away, “Hmm? Oh,” he laughed, “Nope no way, I got extensive surgery from head to toe when I got back they fixed my eyes, 20/20 vision and then some luv, I ain’t blind. Isn’t that meant to be you?” He teased, “You’re beautiful the way you are, you’re strong and you’re a good mother. Trust me when I say that, you are the best mother Lost could ever have or hope for to have found him. I’m glad he didn’t go through anything like I did in that sense,” he looked at her and smiled, “You should be proud of yourself, because you did a fucking amazing job.”

The first thing he knew was pain, burning pain and then a sudden cold metal floor that made him cry out as he hit it, his head was spinning and he didn’t understand it felt like he’d fallen but… there was something itching in his head and he couldn’t think straight and in the end he just slowly stood up sniffling, his knees and elbows grazed he whimpered as he looked around confused. Everything looked weird and smelt funny, he hiccuped as tears began to fall he was hurting and he stumbled trying to find someone.

However when he saw people he tottered towards them before he stopped and reached up tugging on what he thought was clothing, but it felt weird and he rubbed at his eyes. The person span and the child’s eyes widened in fear as he let out a terrified scream at the sight of the monster, he turned and immediately began to run as fast as he could as the necromorph screeched and began to run after him drawing a few others, in the end the child ran into a destroyed and dark shop and realised it was a dead end he tried to hide in the corner before something came running across the floor at him and he screamed terrified and in pain as he kicked and it sank its teeth into him.

@izzyfromdeadspace