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#I have so many doodles of them I need to finish lmao they give me anime vibes
arklay · 2 years
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DIANA x ALBERT WESKER / template.
#mine.#pair: ewskers#oc: diana#click for better quality ♡#posting this before i start changing more things lmao but yes i went nuts and made my own psd from scratch... don't look at me#changed ages to birth years cause of how much time passes in the story!! and also gives cheeky fc for you hehe runs away#the checkboxes make me scream like he almost had a clean sweep it's so funny. and he could've had one more i'm not even joking. cause their#first kiss was technically both of them... like idk how to explain this but they were already standing close then diana moved even closer#and was tracing his jaw and such and they were just lingering while holding eye contact but he was the one who actually closed the distance#so i mean... yeah. she was just about to and he beat her to it!! but diana made the move to get them into that position in the first place#is what i mean. i just couldn't give him more it was already too hilarious lmao#can't tell if i like the lil icons but i can't doodle so peace and love on planet earth but yes i'm happy with how this came out hehe#clueless levels are cause they are clowns <3 i have a lot of thoughts about all that but yes they both take hints in some aspects but i#think they both have trouble telling if they are genuine or not or if they are misreading the situation or whether something is romantic or#not (unless ofc it's over the top and ridiculous. ahem. excella. cough. explodes her with my mind) but yeah hit him with the tism so he's#learnt how to read people very well as he's gotten older but i think when it comes to actual just genuine like wanting to get to know#someone and not just someone wanting to get in his pants he seconds guesses it a lot. and diana's all stems from being rattled by her past#experiences oughguhh and i mean her not actually having experienced proper feelings for someone until him lmao but she's got trust issues#also there were so many tropes i could use (thank you to bestie elliot for helping me finds names of things) but i had to do i got you a#drawer specifically because that moment has such a special place in my heart!! like i need to finish the wip where i talk about that cause#it makes me so silly i'm not even joking#anyway omg i hope the mentions work because doing this on the legacy editor after copying the html for beta one because the image just#didn't want to work in the beta image for some reason rip
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So uh saw the Barbie meme and knew I had to do with with them✨✨ Very special thanks to @verypsbfan019 and @just-a-douglas-simp-existing for reigniting my love for this series still makes me cry to this day I love
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Hawin baby gives me so much kobeni and amajaki vibes I love him so very much
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My man Dane is alright…sortave Uncut non-static version undereath:
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Imma post more of them soon so stay tune lmao ✌🏿
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lynaferns · 1 year
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FNAF Steampunk AU
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That I never finished because I couldn't figure out what was going to be the story and character dynamics, and the role of each character, and yeah… I also spend many days writing, rewriting and changing thing, I didn't even get to finish the first draft and I got artblock.
I think my problem in the first place was that I wanted to make this AU stick to canon. A mistake, I know lmao. Later I thought of just making up most of the things but having to rewrite what I had already done dismotivated me.
So I thought of at least showing this character height chart I made a year ago. And maybe, idk, some of the wips that I never finished.
Maybe some notes and interactions I wrote under a cut.
If you ever want to ask me about what I had planned for this AU go ahead! Some main things about this story are:
All of the events of the story happens in a week (or so).
Gregory acts a little more scared than what is shown in the game.
DCAs arms can stretch up to 100 ft (30 m). He bends them to write or make shapes in the air.
Sun has some nowlege in animatronic repairs and maintenance due to being abandonent, having to repair himself.
Vanessa/Vanny have a biger role than in the game.
Burntrap also apeared more.
All animatronics are equiped with dart guns (for safety!). There are some places that require to leave the dart guns behind to continu.
Pizza is scuare (this is not important, I just felt like adding it).
Also, first idea and some doodles.
Edit: Now Cassie is in the AU
Gregory gets to escape to the locker rooms leaving Chica behind him. While searching for an exit Gregory gets surprised by Sun who was searching for him, and out of fright takes out the camera and flashes his bad eye damaging him for a few seconds.
Sun- "you were carring an object capable of blinding animatronics with you and you didn't use it against Chica to escape?!"
Gregory- "I didn't remember! I was more focused on running than taking a camera out of my pocket!"
Sun-pointing at himself with his hands- "And you had to remember when you saw ME?!"
Monty grabs Moon by the neck and throws him like a stick doing a spinning motion on the air, Roxy chases after him. She comes back carrying Moon with her mouth.
Freddy has an existential crisis by seeing endos. Moon is there awkwardly watching him. He gives him a pat on the back.
The auxiliary arm of the protective cylinder is broken, Gregory has to repair Sun manually. Trying to put his face plate back the nose falls off and Gregory nervously catches it juggling. They look between each others and the nose.
Sun-"..." "Gregory"
Gregory-"..."
Sun-"come on, say it"
Gregory-"..." "Got your nose~"
Vanessa is explaining something to the group. Moon is behind her copying her movements. The others are trying not to laugh. She notices and throws a flashlight at Moon.
They divide in groups. Moon gets on Monty's backs like a gremlin.
Moon-"go gator boy"
Monty-"I hate you"
One last, this is a whole scene that needs a bit of context. The current team members are Gregory, Freddy, Sun/Moon. They have figured out that the safe mode prevents animatronics from acting weird/hostile (found out the hard way in an encounter with moon and a fuse box). Though Moon seems not to attack Gregory anymore they wanted to test it with the rest of the band and found Chica, some things happened, they left her in her room in sleep mode and went to roxy raceway. This begins when they head to the west arcade to repair the service bot's head and on their way they encounter Chica out of the sleep mode but more normal.
(Forgive my poor writing, this was more of a script)
The four of them stare at each other until one decides to react.
Sun–”HELLLLO” Chica– holding her left arm–”A- Hiii, umm” Freddy– “He-hello Chica! What got you here??” Chica– “I-uh…patrol? I- think?? There… There is a child lost in the pizzaplex and we were, like- told to go find him, remember?” “Actually, wait, why are you out of your room? I thought maintenance put you on lock down- And what is the Daycare attendant doing out of the Daycare? it’s not the end of the hour yet- Oh!”–she just saw Gregory behind Freedys legs–”hey! you got the kid-”–flashback of the garbage compactor–”GET HIM”–she points at him with a dart gun– Sun–gets in the way–”WOAH WOAH WOW easy there!” Freddy–”Chica- wait! It’s ok he’s with us” Chica–”T-that-that kid is a menace! He- we should-HAVE to take him to the officer Vanessa–” Gregory–*gasp * Freddy & Sun– “NO!” Chica–”????wha-?
Freddy– “We must not take him to her.” Chica- “You guys kidding?” “These are literal-plain-instructions that you are- just-” “That kid threw me through the garbage compactor!” Gregory–”You tried to kill me!” Chica–”what?! No! I couldn’t do that, that’s against my programming!” Sun–”Uuumm, about that miss-” Chica–”YOU”–points at Sun with the gun– Sun–”?!” Chica–”You were there too!” “You have been with this kid all this time!” Sun–hands up-”Iwastryingtostophim” Freddy–”Chica, calm down, I know what this looks like but-” Sun–”OHMYGOSHWAITGUYS, she’s not hostile!” Chica–”wha-?” Freddy–”what…?” Gregory–”what??” “She’s literally pointing at us with a gun” Sun–standing next to Chica, pointing at her while looking at Freddy and Gregory–”I just noticed! her behavior changed-!” Chica–redirects the gun to re-target him–”you’re getting too close” Sun–ignores that–”She’s back to normal! That means the safe mode worked, we can use this!”
Chica–”What are you talking about?” Freddy–”You’re right! That’s a relief” “right Gregory?” Gregory–”...Yyyyyeah? I guess, yeah” Chica–”seriously, what do you all mean?” Freddy–”Well, It’s a little long story-” Sun–”And we will explain it to you!” “BUT not now, we are in a rush!” “To repair this bot-head so Gregory can ride the racecar” Chica–”...” “‘you serious?” Sun–”yep!” “Say, Gregory! You still want to ride?” Gregory–”uh-yeah” Sun–”Then let’s go!” “TO THE WEST ARCADE!”–grabs Freddy and Gregory and takes them there–”You can come if you want~!” Chica–”...” “OH- GOLLY, WELL” “I guess I’ll just go with you even though I don’t understand what is happening! And no one is going to give me an explanation!” Freddy–”-I promise that I’ll give you a wide explanation once we are done with all this… But in a more private place”
There are actually a couple more of scenes before this one (and after) but I'm not very confident of showing those (or any actually but I don't want this to be buried in my documents and forgoten because I really want to at least make a decent story)
Also, I know that the canon heights for the animatronics are like 6 ft but I prefered my height variety headcanons. Maaaaaybe they are a little too tall looking at it now that I look at it again but, eh.
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randomyuu · 11 months
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there's a lover in the story, but the story's still the same
Ahh, don’t you love it when fear motivates your drawing mood? (not really)
That’s what I felt reading the scene that is drawn below. It’s fear for Yuuji but also feeling excited picturing an emotionless teen!Gojou so here I am. Always down bad for Vox’s Goyuu fics, aren’t I? *sighs*
Welp, here we go.
Title: there’s a lover in the story, but the story’s still the same
Author: @voxofthevoid
Second fic of the series there’s a lover in the story, but the story’s still the same
Pairing YuuGo, NSFW, please read the tags carefully before giving it a read... the usual drill ∠( ᐛ 」∠)_
!!! SPOILER FOR THE FIC !!!
Highly recommend you guys to read them first. Or not, it’s up to you honestly :v
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Usually I would gush about the fic but I’ve already done that under the fic itself so I just want you to know this comic is solely carried by me wanting to draw the ticking time bomb called teen!Gojou-post-discussion-with-adult!Ieiri. You could probably guess what they’re talking about :”)
The fear for Yuuji’s well-being started this, but Satoru’s cold eyes kept me going. I can’t get rid of it from my mind lmao
You can say drawing these kind of expressions is my jam   ( ̄▽ ̄)
I hope I did Satoru’s emotions justice haha
A bit of my thoughts and doodle below. Unhinged maybe, it’s midnight, I got more work to do after this, and my brain cells are barely hanging on. Haha I'm living the life-
I AM STILL REELING FROM THE FACT I MANAGED TO GET THIS DONE.
There are so many things I want to talk about in the process of making this. But after I typed it out, most of them sounded so unnecessary so I rewrote it a few times. I tried to make this as short as possible lmao
Typesetting and sketching are the roughest parts of this project. During these stages, I kept feeling everything I did wasn’t doing the scene enough justice, and it was frustrating. As I planned this project, I read a few doujins and noticed the font types scanlation teams use. There are so many of them, and each helped convey the tone of each image. Felt like crying when I realised I’m not knowledgeable enough to apply good typesetting, ngl. And then the interior design. Fuck, the frustration is so real. I am absolutely clueless about this kind of thing. Tracing lots of references because I have no perception of space makes me feel even worse. I knew first times rarely create a masterpiece, but I was not satisfied with my accomplishment and the feeling of failing to fulfil my own expectations hurt.
BUT.
Thank goodness most of the things I need to draw are Shouko, Yuuji and Satoru. Because dear g o d drawing them healed me. I found so much comfort in drawing Shouko’s long hair and Satoru’s eyes and drowning Yuuji in an oversized hoodie. The comfort zone of character drawing never feels so real lmaooo
Drawing them was so effective that I can look back at the backgrounds with acceptance. Hey, I did it! Not perfect just yet, but I did it!
Haha I feel like I’m losing my mind. I don’t know if it’s in a good way or a bad way. Guess I do have one or two screws loose.
Only for Yuuji lmao
(nah I just need sleep, or cooling down from the rush of having finished this)
It might come off as a surprise if you’ve only seen my art on Tumblr, but I’ve always preferred to draw feminine-leaning ladies. I’ve always loved drawing their curves, whether it’s the figure, the clothes, or the (long) hair. But I’ve grown to like drawing masculine gentlemen as well with their sharp edges and straight lines, and now my ladies start to look more androgynous lmao
Anyway, I was pretty stoked to be able to draw adult!Ieiri! I… I kind of miss drawing long hair so here have some more before you go on your day ∠( ᐛ 」∠)_
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6okuto · 2 months
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hai everypony. used some of u and ur ocs as my muses for a little (big) (rough) spread :3 So u know u r perceived and enjoyed.
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if ur surprised because we don't talk um. i recognize ur user and or did some tag lurking so. hey... um. Hey...... tags and notes under the cut!
@khalixvitae - KHALIX ! do not know this guy At All but i decided to mix things up and use him!! if u have any thoughts to share abt vil i'm all ears! >__<
@sweet-milky-tea705 - JAYCE! yasenia. smoking duck gif. is anything else needed 2 say... i didn't forget her ears i just. upside down. hair. and. giuspelazpe
@koyukiki - Leon Kennedy. LMAO he's literally the most random guy on here. "why hoseok da bus driver" vibe LIKEHEEBFHSB but u know. hiii koyuki!!
@shobvrry - wehehehe... hiii friend,, little shoto for u!! :3 do u like the placement of frozen joke bear. get it. bc. because. he. and. get it
@dira333 - kENMA!! this is evidently Not the thing i wanted to give u but. this has taken a while and i actually want 2 redo the other thing so. haii dira!! \o/
@satorisoup - tHe Only self ship other than me on here. based it on ur existing self ship comms and picrews.. R ur eyes green. like. ..IMCRYING . ROCK ON LENE!
@last0bread - !! azalea has SUCH a cool + unique design!! she's also quite satisfying to draw?? LOL. i also like doodling flowers so thanks for letting me do that :3 🩷 /silly
@mustddart - oh my god i didn't know u changed users and just got so scared. I rock w these guys. i don't know their dynamic i based it solely on this post (& it being percy) but I ROCK W THEM!!! U r one of the people i recognize by user btw. Hiiii stay awesome!!!! 🩷🩷
@luv-indigo - SOOO lovely!! loved reading about nadine and seeing her in each step ^__^ !! i recognize u by user too. Haiii all ur art and ocs r super nice and cool!!! 🙆🏻‍♀️🩷
@vaultureculture - bro i am rocking w this design so hard. elvia is stunning like okkk???!! leander i see u. i get u 🙂‍↕️🔥 phlomis is also Awesome i love the dynamics and story going on IM ROCKING SO HEAVY!!
@kandy-katz - omg. i did the chibi first and by the time i got to the last empty space i realized sol was the only one who was a sole (haha) chibi and !! 😭 i felt so bad bc his full design is SO SO cool so he's here twice. HE'S AWESOME!! 🩷🙆🏻‍♀️
@dreamtydraw - smoking duck gif. apple bag trio.. lOVE THEM!! 🩷💌 wasn't originally gonna do all 3 but i saw this pose and thought it was silly and fun.. yeagh. all ur ocs are always so lovely and unique!!! everypony reading this go check dreamty on itch.io and play all 5 games NOW!!!
@evanox - SARA RAAAHHHH!!!! saraahhhhh!!.???? haha get it. ...just looks like i spelt ur name wrong. Let's carry on. MAEHWA!!! 😭🩷🩷 worked off jayce's art I hope she looks ok. sage is drunk and saying something stupid /affectionate Idk what.. hehe she's lovely!!
@anonymous-eggy - Big Fan of masks and i love this one. HIS DESIGN IS SO FUN!! i finished drawing them the fastest fr fr i want that shirt so bAD and their hair is so nice yeahh i rock w az HEAVY!! 🩷🩷
@someiicecube - cannot overstate how heavy i rock w esther. u hooked me at an awesome stunning design and reeled me in w reading too many romance books and wishing it was him. so me. SO COOL!!! 🩷🩷
da process........
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yeahgh. 👍 i wud like to draw some for real in the future but actually if i draw anything in the next few days my brain will explodeo.
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annawrites444 · 6 months
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i was wondering if you give me a matchup? I’m 5’2 love drawing and reading. I’m a history buff too so I like history uuh I’m introverted, shy. If i need to give you a cabin I honestly don’t know maybe Athena or Apollo.
Matchup Leo Valdez X G/N (Child of Athena) Reader
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Hiiiiii I'm so sorry for the late response I’ve been very busy with school and stuff, I promise to be more on top of the writing for any future requests. Life just kinda jumped on me a lil bit :D
A/N: DON’T REPOST ON ANY OTHER PLATFORM OTHER THAN TUMBLR AND PLEASE GIVE CREDS <3
I put you in Athena Cabin based on your description and have paired you with Leo!! (Percy was a close second)(This is also post-war-with-Gaia)
(Blurb)
You are by nature a very intellectual and clever person, you find a passion in written words and stories. You were often seen around camp with your nose either in your sketch book or in your favorite book. You weren’t new to camp and had been there a few summer before Leo, Piper, and Jason arrived along with the rest of “The 7”. You had gotten to know Annabeth like the back pf your hand, she was the older sister you never had and you guys were often seen together throughout camp. Whenever she wasn’t with Percy she was with you. 
You were underneath the shade of your favorite tree, with your favorite book, in your favorite time of day. It was quiet… a little too quiet. You paid it no mind and went on reading, becoming more and more engrossed in your book the more you were there. Before you knew it you felt a tap on your shoulder and looked up only to meet eyes with Leo, who quickly began to blush at your shy gaze. “Sorry, to bother you…. uh Annabeth wanted me to come get you for sparring since-you know- I was already headed over here… yeah” He practically melting. Leo had no idea what had come over him but he was a blushing mess and you hadn’t even said anything at all. “Okay, thanks Leo.” You reply getting up from your spot under the tree and gathering your things. “Of course, it’s no big deal or anything.” Leo had regained some of his confidence and had the biggest grin on his face. Book and sketchpad in hand you headed down the trail toward the arena with Leo close behind. Little did you know you’d be seeing a lot more of him from now on. You and Leo began to meet up more frequently at your spot, you admitted to liking its safety and quiet and slowly you found yourself opening up to him. He was almost the complete opposite to you, yet somehow your friendship only bloomed from there. 
(Headcanons)
Once you and Leo are finally Dating, you both make plans late at night to meet up in Bunker 9 as his finishes his tinkering you are able to finish your drawings.
Since you tend to be on the quieter side Leo loves to find different ways to make you laugh. He loves your laugh so much oml. Yes, he’s definitely more extroverted but I feel like its a nice balance to your introverted side, kinda like fire and rain. 
He would love it if you read aloud to him while he’s working on his newest project. 
All of your drawings are pinned up on/ around his bunk and workspace. (Some you gave him and some of them he took…)
He once made you this really cool pen that had different colors and tips that were interchangeable. You use it all the time. 
You drew him this really hella cool sketch of Festus, which he did not stop bragging about for like 2 weeks. It’s now the only framed drawing above his bed. 
You both have matching converse, his has the sun embroidered on it, yours has the moon. Both of them have little sharpie doodles on the white part of the tip of the shoe. 
While your hands are probably more on the colder side, Leo’s hands are like burning…(literally lmao). So you both always comment on the other’s temperature.. “geez your hands are freezing” or “Oh my gods, Leo your hands are burning up”. (It never matters to you guys though). 
Overall you guys have the best dynamic making many a camper jealous of the perfect balance the two of you have found. <3
Thank you so much for the request!! I hope you liked it, I did the best I could with the description given!! :))
<3 Anna
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lcvernat · 2 years
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Happy New Year!!! 🎆
2023 is quickly approaching, and to celebrate, and welcome the new beginnings why not highlight this years best offerings.
Make a list of ten of your favorite fics to have come out in 2022; offer up five of your own (give or take), and let the rest be from your fellow writers. 🥰
can’t believe it’s almost 2023… nat, tony & steve rlly kick the bucket this year </3
but this is such a cute idea! gonna put a keep reading tho because i ramble and this turned out a lot longer than it probably should’ve been
top 5 of my fics:
1. that stupid red string - i love this series with my whole heart & i love the characters sm. it also got a lot of notes which i am so grateful abt and i was so shocked. maybe i’ll have to revisit these characters again sometime in the future 🤔
2. our tainted love - admittedly this series hasn’t been finished yet (oops) but i’m so excited to write & finish this series i have it all planned out and it’s so JWNDNWNS i love it
3. playing cupid - the second fic i ever posted here wow … it got so many notes and i was so so shocked and so eternally grateful it holds a very special place in my heart & it’s very cute
4. doodles - i’m not joking when i say this was written at 5am neck deep into a writers block but the idea was so cute & even tho i probably could’ve written it better i still love it and it also got a lot of notes which was very shocking because it was my 5am sleep deprived writing
5. i’m sorry - this was lowkey a vent fic so it holds a special place in my heart even tho it’s quite angsty but it felt so good to just write this fic it was actual therapy for me
tbh this was hard i love all of my fics even if i can’t bring myself to reread them LMAO they all mean so much to me tho they’re my babies
top 5 fics:
1. traces of her on paper by @robiin-buckley - i LOVED this fic and oh my god i just love their writing, they’re so insanely talented my fave fic this year is just everything they’ve ever written. just amazing chefs kiss
2. love is for children by loveisanimaginarydagger on ao3 - love love loved this fic it was so good tbh, angsty but great <333 i stayed up all night reading it tbh
3. after the fight by @lightlyblooming - SOOOOO GOOD i need a nat to take care of me pls and thank you. this writer is so insanely good at writing i’m obsessed
4. peekaboo by @alotofpockets - nat with kids always always gets me, this was so adorable and cute it had me kicking my feet and giggling at 3am. loved it
5. it’s cold outside by @dameronology - screaming tbh, amazing writer literally so good and this was so good just amazing tbh
there are so many other talented amazing writers on this site but y’all need to check out these writers if you haven’t already !! absolutely love their fics these are only a select few of all the amazing fics i love
may 2023 bring more amazing fics !!
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berryblu-arts · 2 years
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I hereby claim all your ocs as my new blorbos (even though I know nothing about them except that they're a chaotic bunch). Especially Zach. He's my boy <333
Actually, take this as an invitation to info dump about any of your wips. They all seem so interesting and I wanna learn more :)))
Anyway, sorry for spamming your notes lmao 😅
Afshsfa I'm so incredibly happy you liked them you don't even know 😭😭💕💕💕💕💕!!! Also, real proud of the main vibe they give off being chaotic lmao
Yooo!!! Youre in luck bc Zac is my specialest boy ever :')!!! Also, you literally gave me motivation to finish a doodle, so now you get to see him with his glowy energy barrier powers >:D
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(dedicating this to you actually, bc it could've just sat there in the drafts accumulating dust if you hadn't sent this ask hahah 😅)
Also just so you know, you managed to pick one of the most tired guys ever for a blorbo lmaoo, he's literally the healer forced to fight, overpowered but just wants his family and stability, hasn't caught a break since age nine, hurt/comfort it gets worse before it gets better in the ao3 tags, would die for his friends in the blink of an eye but is also rlly reserved (at first) sort of character, so good luck with that adsgafzfds
Okok I need to sleep but just know I *will* be talking abt him again just on my blog, unprompted, I have so many blorbo t h o u g h t s
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toorumochi · 3 years
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Hello~ I created some KaruShuu Headcanons for you guys~ hope you enjoy ❤️🧡 (Questions ain’t mine, I just answered them) Also some of them are based off fanfics I have written/read.
Who rocks the Ferris Wheel seat and who flips out and begs them to stop?
KARMA IS A BITCH AND IS ROCKING THE FERRIS WHEEL SEAT WHILE SHUU IS HOLDING ONTO THE POLE FOR DEAR LIFE
Who is always horny and will have sex at any time, at any place and at any time?
Hm. Both. Lmao
Who is more into taking showers/baths together? Who tries to make it relaxing and who tries to make it sexy time?
Karma is the sexy time, always time and Shuu is the relaxing time one BUT. That doesn’t mean he isn’t playing along with Karma
Who likes to walk around the house naked and who tells the other to go put some clothes on?
Karma. Karma walks around at least half naked maybe some boxers - and it’s not like shuu doesn’t enjoy watching his manly man walking around the house beefy af and flexing his muscles without even trying but he still tells karma to put some clothes on
Who sleeps on the couch when they get into a fight?
I DONT CAREEE HOW SOFT THE ARGUMENT WAS. KARMA SLEEPS ON THE COUCH.
Who takes photos of the other while they sleep?
BOTH DO. BOTH DO TAKE PICS OF THE OTHER ONE AND THEY TEASE THEM WITH THE PICS LATER ON
Who said “I love you” first? and who ends their arguments in a fight with “Because I love you”?
I would say that Karma was the first one who said ‘I love you’ and the ‘bc I love you’ feels like smth Shuu would say
Who likes to wear the others sweatshirts?
Shuu likes to wear Karmas, and then:
“...shuu pls give me my clothes back I swear I have nothing to wear-“
Who wakes the other up in the middle of the night to tell them a cool dream they had? Who has the most nightmares, and who sings them back to sleep after?
Karma would be the one with cool dreams and wake Shuu up but since Shuu is a supporting bf/husband he will listen to him ❤️ and when it comes to nightmares, I would say that Shuu gets them but Karma is always there to comfort him ❤️❤️
Who is more likely to cheat?
No❤️ but if it’s in a video game- karma. He is a little bitc-
Who makes fun of the other for having a crush on them, and who has to remind them that they are in a relationship?
NDNSNSNSBD KARMA WOULD MAKE JOKES ABOUT IT LIKE
“Wait whattt??? You have a crush on me? Omggg stahp I’m blushing now”
“......Karma we are dating-“
Or better!
“What? Omg- really? You actually have a crush on me? Damn Shuu why didn’t you tell me”
“...Karma we are marrIED-“
Who starts a food fight in the kitchen?
Karma is a little bitch and he would start with maybe splashing some water onto Shuu and then Shuu turns to face him with a straight face “oh it’s on”
Who initiates duets? and who is the better singer?
Both initiate duets; anywhere and everywhere - and Shuu is the better singer. Karma sounds like a bitch
Who starts the hand holding? Who grabs the others butt? Who slides their arm around their waist? Who likes to put their fingers in the belt loops?
Hmmm maybe Karma would take it easy with the hand holding; like he would start taking Shuus hand when they are at home and when it comes to public he lets it be and waits for Shuu; cause if he is ready to hold hands, Karma is ready too.
GRABBING BUTTS- OMG PLS. KARMA. KARMA WOULD. AND AND HE WOULD TEASE SHUU ABOUT BEING HEAVIER THAT HE IS AND SAY THAT HIS ASS IS 4KG HEAVIER.
AND THE ARM SLIDING AROUND THE WAIST- *slams fist on the table* KARMA WOULD DO THIS ANYWHERE LITERALLY ANYWHERE.
AND THE BELT LOOPS- SHUU. SHUU WOULD THIS BUT LIKE HE WOULD DO IT AS A SIGN THAT HE IS UNCOMFORTABLE AND WANTS TO LEAVE SO HE SHOWS IT TO KARMA THAT WAY AND I THINK ITS ADORABLE.
Who likes to write the others name on their wrist?
Karma would doodle his own name on Shuus arm during study sessions or so ksksksks bonus: Shuu does NOT wash it off, when in the shower, he has this one hand stretched out so the water won’t touch the doodle.
Who is more seductive when they are drunk? and who is louder in bed?
Shuu. Both is Shuu. Pls.
Who is more protective?
Karma is pretty protective- but not in an obsessive way, more like taking care of Shuu and his health as well as his eating habits and sleep
Who talks to the other while they are sleeping?
Karma would just talk and talk till Shuu falls asleep but karma KEEPS ON TALKI-
Who drives and who has the window seat?
Karma drives bc he is the most terrain oriented and besides, Shuu likes to drink from time to time (like coming back from parties or so) so there is no way that a drunk Shuu at the steering wheel would survive.
Who falls asleep in the others lap and who carries them to bed?
Shuu would fall asleep in Karmas lap (DURING SHREK MARATHONSSS 🥴 Idk if anyone gets that but in my fanfics on Wattpad Karma is OBSESSED with Shrek lmao so Shrek marathons >>>) and Karma would carry him to bed.
Who cuts the others hair?
I would say Shuu would cut Karmas hair, pls he is perfect at everything. (.......except cooking and baking *clears throat*)
Who is super bad at sexting? and who sends them encouraging messages throughout the day?
Shuu is hella bad at sexting, but when he is drunk he is the god of flirting lmao
And the encouraging ones- hm... both djdjdjd
Who thinks they are not good enough for the others love? and who’s more afraid of loosing the other? Who thinks they keep messing up, only for the other to tell them they don’t need to worry?
AAAAAA NOOOO *war flashbacks: “You’re my Moron” fanfic ending II”*
Who starts random slow dancing with the other in the kitchen? Who holds the other just above the ground and kisses them?
KARMA KARMA KARMA WOULD. KARMA WOULD START TO RANDOMLY SLOW DANCE WITH SHUU IN THE KITCHEN AND THEN KISS HIM AAAAA
Who says shitty puns and sex jokes just to see the other giggle and blush?
KARMA DOES THIS IN THE MOST INAPPROPRIATE TIMES PLS
Who kissed first?
OH OH!!!
I think!!! That if maybe Karma was the first one to confess bc come on, Shuu has a reputation so yea, but when it comes to first kiss- Shuu would. Shuu would be the one who kisses Karma like totally randomly, maybe hanging out at each other houses and watching a movie and then Shuu leaNS IN AND KISSES HIM AAAAA-
Who orders take out at two in a morning? and who wakes the other up at three in the morning to go downstairs with them to get a glass of water because it’s too dark?
JDJSJSHS KARMA WOULD ORDER TAKE OUT BUT ONLY WHEN THEY ARE MAKING MOVIE MARATHONS AND THE FOOD RUNS OUT- AND THE THREE AM WATER GETTING IS SHUU BC HE IS JUST SCARED OF THE DARK YES.
Who writes poems/stories and love songs about the other? Do they sing the songs the write for them?
YES. THIS. SHUU WOULD. Since he plays many instruments, he finds himself creating love songs for Karma butttt he wouldn’t give them to him bc he would be too embarrassed ndndndnd on the other hand, Karma would write poetry and stories for Shuu like very dorky ones and cute and Shuu finds it adorable on the inside but he has to keep his reputation and standards and stuff like that up so he just says it’s stupid but let me tell you, that boy loves Karmas poetry and stories
Who does some crazy stunt to try and impress the other and who ends up driving them to the emergency room after it backfires?
KARMA WOULD TRY TO IMPRESS AND THEN BAM. HOSPITAL.
BUT. JUST BC KARMA IS A DORK, IT DOESNT MEAN THAT SHUU ISN’T. IMAGINE SHUU TRYING TO BAKE SMTH FOR KARMA FOR THE FIRST TIME AND HE FUCKS UP SO BADLY THEY HAD TO CALL A FIRE DEPARTMENT-
Who is embarrassed when they have to wear their glasses and who thinks they look super cute?
KARMA WOULD WEAR GLASSES BUT HE WOULDN’T BE EMBARRASSED BUTTT SHUU WOULD FIND HIM EVEN MORE ATTRACTIVE
who worries about what they will look like when they are older?
BOTH, they worry that they won’t be good looking enough for the other one
who hogs the blanket?
Karma is a hoe.
who eats the others uneaten pizza crusts?
Pls, Shuu would rather die than not eat his own pizza left overs butttt Karma sometimes wont finish them and Shuu gladly accepts 😩❤️ (also a fanfic reference, bc Shuu loves pizza in that one fanfic so yea-)
who is more likely to cry over a sad book or movie?
BOTH BUT WHEN THEY ARE WATCHING A MOVIE TOGETHER AND ITS SAD THEY WONT ADMIT NOR SHOW IT
who talks while playing video games?
KARMA WOULD CONSTANTLY TALK AND THAT WAY HE CAN BEAT SHUU BC HE DISTRACTS HIM BUT SHUU ALSO TALKS BC HE HAS QUESTIONS ABOUT THE GAME
who sings along with the radio?
KARMA SINGS BUT HORRIBLY AND SHUU IS THE TYPE TO HUM TO THE SONGS
who would enter them both into a talent show?
KARMA BUT NOW THAT I THINK OF IT, RIO WOULD FORCE THEM TO DO THAT BEFORE KARMA CAN EVEN THINK OF IT
who would accidentally set the kitchen on fire while cooking?
DO I NEED TO ANSWER THIS? 💀 (Shuu.)
who would throw the other into a pool?
KARMA WOULD THROW SHUU INTO A POOL. IDC. HE WOULD. B U T SHUU WOULD QUICKLY GRAB ONTO KARMA AND THEY BOTH LAND IN THE POOL. I DON’T MAKE THE RULES.
who shops for groceries?
THEY BOTH DO BUT KARMA IS MORE ORIENTED DJDJDJ
who kills the spiders?
PLSSSS SHUU IS S C R E E T C H I N G AT THE SIGHT OF A SPIDER. KARMA IS THERE TO KILL/GET IT OUT TO SAFETY BUT BEFORE THAT, HE CHASES SHUU AROUND THE HOUSE WITH IT
who is the morning/night person?
SHUU IS A MORNING PERSON AND KARMA A NIGHT PERSON. BUTTTT ON SOME DAYS- *EHEM* SHUU ISNT A MORNING PERSON BC THEY HAD S-
whO PROPOSES?
KARMAAAAAAAA
I thinkkk that I have more of those- as soon as I find them, I’ll post them here 😩✨
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hey-there-juliet · 3 years
Text
Random Drabble Day (2/23)
Summary: First off, let me just say that this is more like a one-shot than a drabble because I'm a wordy bitch and I cannot control myself 😅
That said, I always had a hard time imagining Julie writing some of the Perfect Harmony's lyrics about herself, so I thought why not make this just another song that Luke and Julie wrote together? This is set somewhere between Finally Free and Edge of Great, in that week when Ray was stress-eating. This is supposed to fit back into the show at the end, so it might seem like a cliffhanger, but it's not.
Quick shout out to @jamestkirkish for betaing this for me! I love you and you are amazing! Any remaining mistakes are my own. And to the fabulous Sloan, for helping me out with Luke's handwriting! Enjoy 🧡
Fandom: Julie and the Phantoms
Relationship: Juke 💜
in the great scheme of life and ghosts
No matter how many times Luke insisted that she had been snooping through his things, Julie knew for a fact that she had done no such thing. In reality, she had simply been cleaning the studio when she came across it.
For three ghosts who didn't eat and could barely even touch anything most of the time, the boys sure knew how to make a mess. Every morning Julie would walk into the studio to find the chairs or coffee table rearranged, at least one of the rugs was always askew, and the clothes... the clothes were everywhere, and the worst part was: they reeked. 
And so every morning before leaving for school Julie would shoot them a stern look and tell them to pick up after themselves. Which they did - when she got back home, things were mostly in their rightful place. Still, every weekend Julie would make sure to take a moment away from homework and rehearsal to tidy the place up to perfection, just like her mom liked it. She'd dust off the furniture, water the plants, sweep the floor, and even vacuum the whole place. One Saturday when she was home alone (her dad photographing a wedding, and Carlos at a friend's house), she even went through the trouble of washing all of the guys' old clothes. 
Somehow, and she didn't even want to think about how that worked, the clothes didn't stink when they were actually wearing them, but at any other moment when they made no contact with their skin? Yeah... not good. So she washed them all (three times, using every trick and product she had). She washed them a fourth time for good measure and, by the time she was finished, any traces of twenty-five year old mold was gone, and so was the smell.
So no, she was not snooping - no matter what Luke said - when she came across the crumpled paper ball between the couch and the low cabinet, just behind a big vase her mom had gotten from tía Victoria.
Julie sighed, making a mental note to tell Luke to put his discarded ideas in the bin (again) if he didn't want them anymore, when one scribbled and wrinkled word caught her attention: Perfect Ha-
She bit her lip, staring down at the teasing word. Perfect what? Was it lyrics? Maybe half formed ideas? Doodles? Julie knew Luke liked to doodle in the margins of his notebook whenever he got stuck trying to come up with the next best piece of lyric or melody. She also knew she should probably just leave it alone, put it with his stuff to ask him later if he wanted to keep it, or put it in the garbage. Except the more she glanced down at that damn word, the stronger she felt it pull her towards uncovering whatever else the crumpled paper ball was hiding. 
In the end, the pull was too strong. She'd just take a quick look, make sure it wasn't anything important before she threw it away. And, she reasoned with herself, trying to squish the guilt that was making itself known in the pit of her stomach: Luke had gotten rid of it, so he clearly didn't care much for whatever was in there. 
Not able to resist any longer, Julie carefully unfolded the paper, slowly making her way towards the piano and using its surface as a table to help smooth the page over.
Luke's (horrendous) handwriting covered it with the bare bones of a song, random lines were scribbled in the margins with a couple of doodles for company, and even a little note from their bassist - ‘Reggie was here ;)’.
It took her a minute before the chicken scratches became words, and then Julie's breath left her in a rush, as the guilty feeling in her stomach turned into butterflies and flew away with her imagination. 
It was a song, parts of one, anyway, and - more importantly - it was a love song.
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Unprompted, her own words came back to her, "Wow, Luke! I didn't know you were such a romantic." Quickly followed by Alex's short reply, "He's not."
She knew now who Unsaid Emily was really about, but these new words were clearly about a different kind of love. The romantic kind, and Julie couldn't help letting herself believe - just for a moment - that the song might be about her.
Before she could let herself be carried away in a daydream, there was a - now familiar - shift in the air, a sound almost like static, the only thing letting her know of a ghost's appearance. Without a thought, she crumpled the page again and shoved the paper ball in her pocket for later inspection. 
"Hey, Julie!" Reggie's cheerful greeting sounded across the studio from where he had poofed in, and soon - with his "help," bless him - Julie was finished with her weekend clean up. 
As if summoned by the end of her chores, Luke poofed in, ready to rehearse. Alex soon followed; and by the time Julie retired for the night, the song had been almost forgotten where it hid inside her pocket. 
Almost.
***
After getting ready for the night, Julie settled on her bed with the wrinkled page and her dreambox. She read over the words again and again, imagining they were about her.
Step into my world, 
Bittersweet love story about a girl 
Shook me to the core 
Voice like an angel, 
I've never heard before, 
You and me together, it's more than chemistry 
Love me as I am 
I hold your music 
Here inside my hands 
You are my brightest burning star 
We create Perfect Harmony.
And unless Luke had been singing with another girl, there didn't seem to be many options on who it could be about, right?
From the beginning, Julie had felt something connecting her to him; to all of them, in different ways. But Luke had been the one to give her a little piece of his soul right after meeting her when he let her use Bright to earn back her spot in the music program. Seeing his passion reflecting back on her, the way he treated music like she used to, made her miss it more than anything for the first time in almost a year. It made her miss the way it felt to use music to connect with her mom.
After they spent a whole weekend finishing each other's songs and working on new ones, getting to know each other's inner workings - the part of them that bled out feelings into paper to create beautiful melodies, Julie knew she was a goner. Finding out he'd been the one to write the words that shaped her taste in rock certainly didn't help. Like he'd been helping her find her way to music long before they even met.
Her crush on him had been inevitable from the start, and while falling for him was probably one of the worst things she could’ve done, it was too late to stop it. She'd been free falling for a while, and hopefully she'd land in his arms soon enough. Reading over his words again gave Julie a warm fluttering in her stomach that made her think he was more than ready to catch her once she reached the ground. 
Carefully folding the piece of paper, she put it inside her dreambox, then placed the box back on the shelf.
***
The following week went by without any hiccups. Every once in a while, Julie would remember Luke's song and a familiar warmth would fill her up, leaving a soft smile on her lips and glazed eyes staring off at nothing. Just as often, Flynn would have to shake her out of her daydreams.
She didn't think much would come of it until her dad decided to throw the band a party so he could film them and post their video on YouTube. Which was fine. Amazing, even. It was most certainly great! Until Luke came to the school, staring at her with his stupid, beautiful, awed eyes, and with his soft, perfect smile, saying things that made her combust and melt, all at the same time.
"I think you make me a better writer." 
    "I think we make each other better."
Calling Nick 'Luke' was bad enough, but slipping into a complete musical sequence as she danced with him? "Goner" didn't even begin to describe her. 
Like the other times they'd written together, the lyrics flowed through her, finishing the song he'd started with the same ease as one would take a breath.
Julie knew that whatever was going on between her and Luke couldn't happen or, if it did, it couldn't last. In fact, in the great scheme of life and ghosts, she didn't know much, but what she did know was that - be it in life or in death - love was constant. 
He didn't need to have a heartbeat or to be able to touch her for her to love him. He was just as real to her as the next person, and whether it would hurt in the long run or not, it didn't matter. 
She knew Flynn was only looking out for her, but that ship had sailed, and Julie was already so lost in his ocean eyes that avoiding eye contact wasn't going to bring it back. She would entertain her though, even knowing it wouldn't work. Just like the tide, eventually he'd pull her right back in.
She could love him just as he was, for however long they had together, and especially after that.
-
End notes: I hope you guys enjoyed it! And, if you'll notice, at the beginning it kind of gives off the impression that Luke eventually finds out about the song and Julie tells him how she found it. Which may or may not lead you to believe that they're in a relationship. I guess it all depends on interpretation though ;)
Oh, also! Shout out to the chaos squad folks that guessed right! You guys are no fun :( /j lmao
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the-fandom-fuckup · 4 years
Note
Kirikacchako? Please
I'm not sure if this is referencing a specific prompt from like.. An older post or not, but I've been on a bit of an au kick lately so I'm gonna use this as a plug for some of the aus/ideas I've had, so I hope that's alright ^-^
(I'd offer a doodle for your troubles but... I don't have any to offer rn gjskfksjfkak)
One of the most recent ideas I've had is Kirichako sirens x hoh/ace pirate Baku, in which Kirichako are a mated pair of sirens that travel the seas together to prey on unsuspecting sailors and Baku is a pirate that spends a bit too much time around the cannons n explosives, resulting in hearing loss over time
Upon meeting Baku for the first time Kiri n Ochako are both fascninated and peeved. Fascinated bc no one's ever looked them in the eyes during their song and resisted them like he has, and peeved bc immediately after staring at them Baku tried killing them with explosives
Like sure, they've met people on the seas that have been resistent to either their song or bodies before, but never someone who was unaffected by both. They didn't know whether to be more interested or insulted honestly
((They go with interested, but tell themselves they're insulted bc it's easier to admit))
N honestly I don't have much here, but they end up following Baku's ship around bc it has some good benefits (provides them with protection from bigger sea creatures, food from all the ships they destroy/people they fuck up), and also they just like bothering Baku until they get a reaction from him
They don't sing to him anymore, but they chitter at him n throw pretty sea trinkets up against the ship/into open cannon flaps for him to find later
The last thing I have for this idea is the courting process probably starts bc Baku tripped on the sea trinkets one too many times while carrying out his duties n gets pissed, so he goes up to the main deck to get their attention before chucking some sparkly, garbage thing back at them hoping to distract them enough to get them to fuck off. But the sirens look at their new gift and go wait... Returned gift?? A courting gift?? Which goes to kickstarts a whole new wave of bullshit lmao, rip Baku's sanity
Another idea I wanna shoehorn these guys into is my EnjiRei/TodoDeku mafia bodyguard au, but I'm not too sure on how to go about it tbh like
One one hand, I could have Kiri in with the Todorokis n Ochako in with All Might's group, and have Baku be the unsuspecting civilian just trying to live his life but has attracted the attention of both gang members, who then treat it as a rivalry of who gets Baku first but end up seeing each other as more than just rival groups when the gangs actually start working together n they get paired to run jobs, and has everyone spiralling into a mess of feelings and highjinks before leveling out to smth manageable
On another hand I could have a similar idea with Kacchako as the rivaling gang members and Kiri as the unsuspecting civilian, or maybe even some other underground member like an underground ring fighter or a runner or whatever, who gets scouted by the groups bc his reputation in the ring gets him a gig as some extra muscle or smth for an outside job
And then on the last hand I could have pre-established Kiribaku as the gang members (in the same gang this time) and Ochako as the civilian making bad deals with shady people for extra cash to try and help her family out of their shitty finacial situation, taking jobs she has no business taking (probably from the rising group that's fucking up everything for everyone else tbh) n catching the boys' attention bc "what's a pretty little thing like you doing in the sleazy part of town? Don'tcha know shit gets dangerous around here?" And they're endeared by her spunk n unwillingness to crumble under pressure so they take her under their wing to show her the ropes but also gives them their kicks bc they get off on corrupting her innocent n naive moral compass, all while being hunted by the other group bc she ditched their jobs n now has to face the consequences or smth, Idk idk
It would help if I had any understanding of how mobs/organised crime shit worked or even watched those kinds of shows/movies lmaofnakfmdjs
I'll finish it off with the modern fantasy au I've been thinking about bc I love it dearly, staring alpha werewolf Baku, alpha dragon Kiri, and bamf witch Ochako
At some point or other Baku gets the entire Bakusquad + Deku, Tetsu, Camie, and Ochako living in his packhouse bc he takes a great deal of pride in caring for his pack members and it's actually really easy for his alpha to categorise people as pack, but you'd have to pull out all his teeth before he admits it
Some of them just decided they lived there now n didn't leave, but both Kiri (+Tetsu) and Ochako were brought in by Baku bc his alpha's love language is acts of service/providing and clearly they both benefitted from the move so "why tf are you making such a big deal about it?? Just pack your shit n get it moved in, you've got a week"
Kirikacchako dance around each other hardcore in this au, to the exasperation of everyone else. The alphas try to play off their urges to provide n scentmark as subtly as possible, and since Ochako isn't aware of the meaning it goes pretty well. But literally everyone else is rolling their eyes n making bets on how long it takes them to get their shit together lmaojdidudj
A scene I have pictured for them (and the first one I came up with for this au) is Ochako going out somewhere and Kiri n Baku both casually scent her before she heads out, thinking they're all slick n shit. But as soon as she leaves Deku levels them with the most deadpan expression he can make n says "that was the least subtle thing I've ever seen in my life", and as Baku snaps n goes "I dunno what you're talking about" Kiri replies with a smug "I wasn't trying to be😏"
And like. Realistically the alphas know Ochako isn't really an omega, but she does share some traditional omega qualities that have their alphas going wild (period cycle=heat cycle, round n squishy but will fight you=strength n size for providing healthy pups + the ability to protect them, etc.) so it's understandable that their alphas would slip up n refer to her as their omega, right? Right??
It also doesn't help that after taking Ochako with them on full moon runs, she's been chatting with some of the betas n omegas there and asking how to better communicate with the boys (to avoid miscommunication, she says). But they've both marked her so much that the betas n omegas think she's their courted omega, so they teach her vocal cues n what they mean coming from an alpha, and teach her how to purr and chirp in response.
They don't think to mention the significance behind some of the cues they teach her bc why would they? Smelling as strongly as she does, there's no way those alphas aren't going to give her their bite n bond with her. Why would they need to explain some of the more provocative noises they teach her? They're just helping her for when her alphas decide it's the right time to mate her, is all
I haven't gotten around to how their tension n dancing breaks, but it does eventually n they do get together n bond and all that good stuff, and eventually they have werewolf/dragon/magic hybrid babies bc I have quirkbabes design in another au n I'm obviously dropping them into every au I possibly can bc I love them n put a lot of work into them (and they're super pretty, so I'm showing them off where ever I can assuming I actually draw smth for this au eventually rip)
And wow, this is getting kinda long n rambly so I'm gonna end it here, but I hope that this was kinda what you were looking for landkwidjdkwbf
If you wanna know more about any of the aus just let me know, I could ramble forever
Or if you have any other kirikacchako ideas you wanna hear about feel free to drop them off, I don't mind!! ^-^
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nymphigeon · 4 years
Text
Someone you love(d) || KTH
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• Pairing: Taehyung x Reader(f)
• Genre: break up au, angst with a happy ending, fluff? (just a lil' bit at the end :))
• Rating: PG
• Words: 7.2k
• Warnings: swearing, mention of weight, they kiss like once, if you don't like cheesy things....skip this one lmao
• Summary: You thought he loved you, you really did, but the way he left told you something else.
Or alternatively;
Taehyung is an emotionally constipated idiot who doesn't know how to deal with his feelings.
• A/N: Okay it took me waaay too long to write this, I'm so sorry T_T I really wanted to get this out earlier, but well things happened....
I only proofread this like once and had some trouble getting everything into the post properly so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes!  Please let me know if you find any so I can fix them asap.
Thank you for the request @mytaetaey​! I hope it matches your expectations!!!
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It honestly hasn't even been that long since the day he showed up at my house.
"Let’s break up."
Although I really wouldn't be able to tell you how much time had truly passed.
"W-wait why?"
Days felt like weeks, weeks felt like months. Everything just seemed to last a lot longer than it should have.
"Did I do something wrong? I-I can fix it, just tell me!"
It might have happened last week, or the week before that. Wasn't it three weeks ago?
"No, no you didn't do anything wrong y/n. I'm sorry this just isn't working out."
Bottom line is, the passing of time hasn't really been on my mind. Any day without him is a day lost, a day to forget about.
"What do you mean this isn’t working out? I thought we were doing well together..."
I remember the confusion that went through me. All of a sudden the four years we spent together seemed to have disappeared.
“You thought wrong.”
He had been acting weird for a while, never quite getting close to telling me what was going through his mind. I hadn’t anticipated it ever ending like this though.
“Not everything you believe is a fact.”
The years I had to get to know him ended too soon. They went by so fast, they might as well have been non-existent.
"I... why? I don’t understand…
This all came too sudden. Just a few days before he had been laying on my bed, smiling as I told him about my day.
"I just don't feel the same anymore."
I just needed a little more time. A little more time to adore him. A little more time to say goodbye.
"I don't love you anymore."
But I still did do. He didn’t seem to care though. After he took care of me for a while, he decided I’m not worth it. Not even as someone who he just passes by.
"It's best if we don't see each other anymore."
If you cherish what you have you'll never be left unsatisfied.
"Goodbye."
I did. And it broke me.
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“Y/n? Helloooo?”
My daydreams get interrupted by a waving hand in front of my face, followed by a harsh flick against my forehead.
“Ouch! Mina that was too hard!” Both my hands shoot up to the stinging spot between my eyes, one to prevent the evil hand from handing out another flick, the other one to rub at the red spot forming.
“Class ended a few minutes ago, you should probably pack up. Really, did you just stare off into space for the entire class?” Spotting my close to empty notebook, Mina sighs and shakes her head. She’s trying to look disappointed, but under the scolding exterior she’s putting on, there is a hint of pity.
It’s not the first time this week that not a single word has made it into my notes. Each time again the pages are either filled with lazy doodles and meaningless scribbles, or a space of absolute nothingness, not even a drop of ink staining the white paper.
“I’m sorry, I really did try to pay attention, but you know I hate his classes with a passion.” We both know that’s not the reason for my absentness, and neither of us speaks up about it. It’s what I requested myself, not being able to cope with the sadness I was causing my friends to feel. They care too much, I don’t want to burden them for too long.
“I know sweetheart, you did do your best. I’ll send my notes later, if you want I’ll help you understand them too.” Though no matter how hard I try, I still rely on them. They keep convincing me to, their kind souls not being able to leave me alone.  “If you could I’d really appreciate it.”
A sweet smile appears on Mina’s lips as I accept her offer, being more than happy to help me. She has always been the type to give more than she received, and despite me believing she deserves more than she gets, I adore her for it. “Of course, any time.”
I finish packing my belongings into my backpack, first making sure I didn’t leave anything behind before leaving the classroom with Mina close to my side. She talks about everything and nothing as we roam the spacious hallways filled with tired looking students. I wouldn’t be surprised if more than half of them slept until the end of their lectures.
Most of Mina’s words fall on deaf ears as I think back to the thoughts that occupied my mind the entire time my teacher was trying to explain the principle of quantum mechanics. I wouldn’t have understood it regardless of whether I was paying attention or not by the way.
“Ah you don’t have any more classes today, do you?” An unannounced weight falls on my left side as Mina whines into my shoulder, effectively bringing me back down to earth. Some brabbles about life being unfair escape the muffled sounds she produces, clearly not looking forward to the rest of her day.
“I’m going to be so lonely, me and Daeun aren’t allowed to sit next to each other anymore.” Mina raises her head to catch some air, her hands still clinging to the fabric of my shirt. The scowl on her face isn’t hard to miss, as she isn’t doing much to hide it.
“I was just going to head home straight away.” On any other day I would’ve probably teased her, wishing her good luck while I go and enjoy the free life. Today however, I don’t. My face stays in it’s boring resting position, even as Mina waits for the non-existent twist at the end.
It doesn’t take long before she finally sees I’m not poking fun at her. The moment of realization is clear, her whiny expression disappearing and her hands falling back to her sides. “Oh.”
“Well since it’s Friday how about I come hang out at your place when I’m done here? I’ll drag Daeun along with me too.” Mina’s voice is unsure, scared that I’ll reject her offer. A thick tension hangs in the air as we both wait for my reply.
I want to be alone. I want to be able to overthink in peace without others insisting that my mind is wrong. Though on the other side, I do know that I’ve been pushing them away. All the more reason for them to worry about me.
“Yeah sure.” I manage to convince myself to decide on the option I’d like the least. Somewhere I may be hoping that I’ve been missing out on a distraction I needed. I will never know until I experience it.
“Great! I’ll bring snacks too, let’s make it a movie night!” And off she goes, not waiting for any kind of confirmation from my side. Most likely it’s a way to keep me from refusing, forcing me into a situation that’s best for me, according to her.
I might not be looking forward to the events to come, but even I can’t deny the dull blossoming of my heart. The corners of my lips tug up, together with a hand to wave the girl off.
Yeah, perhaps, just maybe, I’m excited to spend some time with them.
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I wasted a lot of time trying to figure out what’s wrong with me. Did I gain too much weight? Did I not text him enough? Was I going down the wrong path?
No matter what I wrote down, which new question I thought of, it didn’t seem right. Crumpled up paper balls and clothes littering the apartment show of the frustration occupying my mind.
No aspect of me changed for the worse. I’m still the same healthy weight, we texted almost every day, and I’m running up the path to a successful career. There is nothing wrong with me, so why am I blaming myself so heavily?
Because for some reason I believe that if I had done things differently the outcome would have been better. Because maybe he would’ve changed his mind if I reacted differently. Because it could never be him who was in the wrong.
A knock on the door and the pen I had been holding drops. Focussing on the paper in front of me once more, the harsh worded sentences ending in large written question marks stand out. I’m yearning for answers to questions I don’t even understand myself and it’s terrifying.
Three knocks on the door this time and I’m up, quickly discarding all the papers littering around. Some I tear to pieces, making sure none of the written sentences are visible anymore, others simply get hidden.
The door creaks as it opens, broadcasting it’s old age to the world. I should probably replace it sometime before someone decides to break in. Not that there’s anything worth taking here, I am a student after all.
“Hey dea- Oh no you look horrible.” A slight gasp interrupts Daeun’s cheery greeting when she notices the birds nest that is my hair. After having acted out all my annoyance on the poor strands, they’ve taken to each other for comfort, gladly intertwining. To my dismay, of course.
“I feel horrible. Come in.” The chuckle meant to lighten the statement doesn’t do it’s job properly. Both don’t say anything more as they enter the tiny apartment I call home, but they might as well have been screaming ‘I feel sorry for you.’” If they won’t do it, their faces definitely will.
“I won’t let any of you chose a movie tonight, I’ve got way too many good ideas.” Mina drops the overfilled bags she was holding on the dinner table while she talks. From the few items that stick out it’s safe to deduce that they’re filled with snacks to the brim.
“Also I was thinking we could order some pizza for dinner. All on me, I just got payed.” Like she owns the place, Mina reaches for several bowls high up in the cupboards of the kitchen. “We’ll use these tonight..” She says it more so to herself than to anyone else, not bothering to ask me anything. Not that it was really needed, I would have given her permission anyway.
“How was your day?” Sitting down next to Daeun, who has made herself comfortable on the couch after walking in, I try to start a basic conversation. Even though I’m not particularly in the mood for anything, I decide it’s probably best to try before I ruin the fun.
“You shouldn’t have to pretend that everything is okay, you know.” My question is completely ignored, switched for a statement that sets a heavy atmosphere in the room. The little excitement I had for their visit disappears. Instead, irritation starts taking over.
“Look Daeun, I-”
“I know you don’t want to talk about it, but this is not the way to cope with whatever may be happening inside you right now.” The tone she uses tells me she isn’t about to back out anytime soon. I hate it, hate how she feels like she can tell me what’s best for me.
“If this is what you came here for then I think it’s best that you leave. I’m not playing around here.” I turn away from the both of them, showing my back instead. This was supposed to be a fun evening to get my mind off him. Turns out, it’s the exact opposite.
“She’s right y/n.” It didn’t sound like Mina initially wanted to talk about this. She has always been unsure of when and how to address things, usually rather staying silent. With the right help however, Mina too will spill her words.
“This will always be a part of your life now, no matter how hard you try to erase it, you can’t. I know you’re hurting, and you’re allowed to feel hurt, we just want to help you. We’ll distract you all you like later, but for now, just confide in us please?”
It’s the way I feel both of their eyes burning into my back, the way she isn’t exactly sure how to convey her thoughts, though has the best intentions, the way a gentle hand softly lands on my shoulder. Sooner or later the dam would have broken. Apparently that time has come.
“I gave up so much for that guy! I moved to a more expensive apartment closer to his so we could see each other more, I started working more hours so he wouldn’t need to pay every time we went out together,” I never really got the chance to complain about the negative side to the changes I made, always feeling like it should be worth it, since I did it for him.
“I studied late into the night just so I had time during the day to hang out with him, do you know how much sleep I lost? I couldn’t even go home to my parents regularly anymore, for the distance was too much.”
Not exactly having expected me to rant so much, the two girls seated next to me stare in surprise. Never have I expressed any discomfort with what I was doing, always plastering a smile on my face.
“I don’t even mind that he broke up with me, I mean I do, but he was so cold! I had done my best to keep things going between us and he just gives me an ‘oh I don’t like you anymore’ like it’s common sense. I didn’t even get a thank you for all those years or a sorry for breaking it off! I just wish he’d…”
I take in a deep breath after having forgotten to breathe for the past minute, all the tears I kept in finally making an appearance as my anger get replaced by the same sadness I felt all those days ago.
“I just wished he’d at least given me reassurance I hadn’t been a waste of his time.”
The volume in which I spoke had drastically lowered, coming out in an almost-whisper. All the objects in front of me blurred as a non-stop stream of tears made it’s way out, my cries just mere silent sobs.
The hand resting on my shoulder becomes an arm pulling me into her side, the rough material of her shirt revealing her identity. Daeun doesn’t say anything as her other hand strokes through the strands of my hair, detangling any knots on the way.
For a moment I feel guilty about the tears wetting her shirt. It’s when she pulls me against her a little tighter that the feeling disappears, giving me the opportunity to fully bask in her embrace.
“I’m so sorry sweetheart.” Feeling left out, Mina pats my thigh and breaks the silence. “You worked hard didn’t you? Because you loved him.” I can hear her clothes rustling first, before her arms too wrap around the space Daeun left.
“I still do.” No matter how much I try to forget about him, I can’t seem to do it. He has engraved himself into my mind, forever stuck. If he’d ever leave is a mystery, though for now, it seems impossible.
You know what? Fuck you Kim Taehyung.
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“Dude, what do you want for your birthday?” It’s Jungkook who has slammed down my door and completely disturbed my peace.
“Huh? Nothing in particular really.” Despite the rude entrance, I don’t look up from my tv screen, having already gotten used to the lack of announcements before he comes in.
“Didn’t you ask me that already two days ago?” Once again ignoring any form of politeness, the younger one makes grabby hands towards the bag of potato chips laying next to me. I don’t make any move to stop him, knowing very well I can’t win from him in a fight, ever.
“Yeah because I thought maybe you changed your mind. Usually you’re so excited for your birthday, but you just seem so… Unenthusiastic?” There is almost no way to take him seriously when he’s scarfing down my dear food like it’s water. Surely when were out next time I’ll make him get me a new bag.
“Well yeah that’s because…” What exactly was I going to say?
Finally grabbing his full attention, Jungkook puts down the bag of chips and lets himself fall down next to me. “Because?”
There is no mistaking his smirk for a smile, although he does his damn best to hide it. He knows exactly what I was about to say, and I’m not about to admit anything.
“Because I realized it’s nothing to be overly excited about. That’s it.” Challenging Jungkook to prove me wrong I stare right back at him, not planning on chickening out any time soon. It seems to have worked, as he looks away first.
“Ah is that so? I’ll just see if I can find something you’ll like myself in that case.” The boy who has silently admitted defeat removes himself from the couch, moving to his room at the other side of our apartment.  “Good luck buddy.”
No longer having to pay attention to him, I rewind the movie I was watching back. That muscle bunny just made me miss the absolute best part.
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“So why exactly are you dragging me to town again?”
It’s not too busy today, which should have been a given as it’s a normal weekday. Everyone is either yawning behind a desk or running around in circles depending on their career choices. Compared to them, I’m making the worst possible choice by letting my best friend convince me to skip class for a reason I wasn’t even familiar with.
“I’m having none of this ‘I don’t care what you get me’ nonsense. We’re going to find something you like, and that’s why we’re here.” Jimin takes a pause from pulling me along by hand to put both of his on his waist like a proud toddler.
“So in other words, we’re here so I can choose my own birthday gift?” Slowly I begin to understand how much of a waste of my time this is. I could’ve been doing fine trying to understand whatever Mrs. Wilson wanted to go over today, but instead I’m going to be reminded of my ex all day. Great.
Well, if she was still here it wouldn’t have mattered whether I knew what I wanted or not, she always had something great for me, and I always looked forward to it. Once she jokingly told me how she felt pressured, having to live up to my expectations. Though honestly there was nothing for her to live up to, I liked her gifts because she gave them to me. Because she always managed to make each and every birthday a fun one.
“Any ideas yet? Jewellery, clothes, games… Wait, nothing too expensive, I’ll go broke!” Jimin’s sudden panic manages to bubble up a chuckle in me. He doesn’t really seem to appreciate it though, as he scowls at the sound. “What? Your taste is too expensive!”
He knows me well it seems. Not that it was ever a real secret. When the contents of your closet is worth more than someone’s rent several times anybody would want to show that off right? Well so do I.
We walk into several stores for inspiration. No real shopping haul, just a quick in and out with Jimin trying to get a reaction out of me by stuffing things he thinks I like into my face. So far no real success, my only reaction being something along the lines of ‘ah yes that looks nice’ at everything he proposes.
It’s not like I’m purposefully trying not to find something I truly like, but more that honestly nothing catches my interest. And I promise it’s not even the price, some of my most prized possessions are the cheapest things I own. This just isn’t doing it for me.
After having been pulled into the what feels like the hundredth store, my stomach decides to make the loudest noise known to mankind. “Can we like, maybe take a break?” There is no doubt that my face is bright red at this moment, instantly heating up when Jimin laughs equally as loud.
“If you were hungry you should’ve just said so. Let’s go find something to eat.” Is probably the only sentence he said today that I’ve fully agreed on.
It sounded so easy, just find somewhere to buy food. Unfortunately, getting our tummies filled wasn’t written in our future so soon. No matter where we look, everything is either closed or completely full with customers. Who knew so many other people were hungry at this moment. Not like it’s close to dinner time or anything.
Eventually, I manage to convince Jimin to eat at a small fancy restaurant down the street on my expense. Despite him agreeing after a few attempts, a set pout is still present on his face, which doesn’t seem to be leaving anytime soon. Together with some murmurs about how this isn’t fair, he makes himself look incredibly adorable.
Soon however, I would come to regret my decision. The fancy tablecloths and nicely plated food wouldn’t be looking so appealing anymore. Because even if I had convinced my mind of the truth my constant lies hold, there was simply no way for me to convince my heart too.
“Hey isn’t that y/n and… I don’t think I know him.”
The male opposite her had somehow won her over with that stupid perfect smile he wore, his eyes an annoyingly beautiful ocean deep blue and his blonde hair styled in an awfully neat way. Everything about the sight annoys the heck out of me, including the way she was smiling back at him. Why does she look so happy? When was the last time I saw her like that?
“Oh are they… I’m sorry Tae.”
I was the one who broke up with her. I was the one who walked out with a load haven fallen off of my shoulders. I was the one who ran even though she cried. There is no reason for me not to be completely fine.
“I don’t care, she can do whatever she wants now.”
So then why am I the one hurting this much?
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It came sooner than expected, my birthday. Just sort of snuck up on me. After the restaurant incident Jimin himself magically decided to end the shopping trip and go home to eat. Nobody ever mentioned my birthday again in the following days.
It was pretty clear that someone had told the others about what happened, although none of them spoke about it. That someone obviously being Jimin.
“Soooo… any plans for the day?”
The question comes from Jungkook, who is fidgeting with the hem of his oversized hoodie. He stands quietly in the doorway to my room, waiting for an answer he already knows.
“Go to class and study after.”
“You’re not going out of the house? No party planned?” The suffocating nervosity radiates off of him in waves, displayed by the still ongoing fidgeting and his eyes that can’t seem to focus on one thing at a time.
“Nope, no other plans.” I sit up in bed, slowly coming to terms with the fact that I won’t be getting any more sleep. Despite him looking like he’s scared I’m going to get mad, he doesn’t actually give up, which isn’t appreciated on my part.
“Well the boys thought we could maybe go out together, get a few drinks.” On any other day besides my birthday I would’ve most likely agreed to the plan. Today however, I can’t help but relate every proposition to my birthday, which I, in case you hadn’t noticed yet, want to forget about as soon as possible.
I had already given him enough opportunities to stop. All it would take was leaving me alone. His constant persistence ends up getting to me, successfully causing me to snap at the younger boy. If he expected an outburst, he’s getting it.
“Why the fuck does everyone expect me to celebrate today? If my birthday is the day on which I can do whatever shit I want then let me do whatever I want!” It wasn’t meant to come out that way, and the guilt sets in the moment I realize it, but I don’t have time to apologize.
“Dude, you seriously need to do something about your feelings for y/n.” He sighs the words as he casually leans against the wall, his arms crossed. In an instant the awkward energy around him disappears, replaced by a very prominent eye roll. It’s not hard to guess that this has been on his mind for a while.
“Don’t mention her. This has nothing to do with her.”
“This has everything to do with her and you know it.”
I don’t have anything to say against that. We both know it’s the truth, though only one of us is trying to deny it. The dumb one.
“You know what I think? You spent your past 6 birthdays with the girl of your dreams and now that you pushed her away you have no idea what to do. Am I right?”
He is. I don’t say anything as my head lowers, slowly realizing there is no hiding anything from him. She’s still on my mind. I still wonder what she’s doing, where she is, if she’s safe. I still care. “You’re right.”
I broke up with who I considered my other half, convincing myself that I didn’t need her anymore. Who exactly was I trying to protect?
“I had to, I’ll hurt her.” I already did.
“And suddenly breaking up with her is supposed to make her happy?” I was hoping it would in the long run.
“You’re not the same as him.” Though I am. The same parents, the same group of friends growing up, the same sense of humour. We got along so well. What if we still do?
“He’s my brother Kook. We were so alike. You know he once too adored her.” We don’t talk anymore, I’m disappointed in him. He would’ve been too. I don’t understand what changed.
“He used her, nobody saw it coming. The signs were there, he just hid them too well.” Jungkook leaves his spot against to wall to comfort me, tucking my head into his neck.
“You’re not him and he isn’t you. The fact that you no longer want to be associated with him proves everything. He didn’t care about Hyeon.” So he can look straight at me, he pushes me away with his hands on my shoulders. The expression on his face tells me he’s serious.
“You love her, and you’ve got to fix this mess.”
I don’t like agreeing with him, but once again, he’s right.
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As soon as I open the door I want to slam it right back into his face. Or I might want to run into his arms, I can’t decide yet. Regardless, I wasn’t expecting Taehyung to be standing on the other side when the doorbell went off.
“Umm… Hi?” All the words that have been building up in my personal dictionary seem to disappear the moment I lay my eyes on him. He still looks as good as the last time I saw him, even though the circumstances were heart-breaking.
“Hey, um I’m sorry I showed up unannounced. I didn’t really think this through…” Everything about him screams awkward. From the way his feet are pointed slightly more inwards than normally, to the way he doesn’t seem to be able to smile naturally. Instead there is this weird, tight expression on his face.
“Oh um… Would you like to come in though?” I don’t wait for an answer as I step aside, my memory helping me remind that nine out of ten times the answer to that question is ‘yes’. “Oh yeah, thank you.”
“Do you want anything to drink?” Not really having anything to say I cycle through the set few sentences I usually need when I have someone over. I’m not happy that he’s here, but I’m not the type to lash out at people.
“Ah no, I’m okay. Look I’m just going to get straight to the point, I messed up big time. I got insecure and closed myself off to everyone including you and I’m so fucking sorry that I did.”
My lack of reaction surprises me. Sure, my insides are doing somersaults, but I don’t feel the need to express any of it. Like an unused sheet of paper, my face stays blank. “And now you’re here to win me back I presume?”
Somewhere in between his statement and mine, the tables shifted. Slowly, I’m gaining the confidence he is losing.
“Well, not really, I mean yes, but-”
He catches himself rambling, shutting his mouth before any real nonsense can make it out. Taking a deep breath helps, the words coming out more fluently after. Not a great start, but it’s okay. I have patience. Sometimes.
“I just wanted to let you know that the words I shot at you that day weren’t true. I hurt you and I didn’t want those words to roam your mind not knowing they weren’t even close to what I was feeling.”
The deep breath he drew in earlier escapes in a deep sigh, followed by his mouth opening and closing a few times without any sounds making it out. “And?” It was meant as a way to encourage him to continue. Sadly, it came out rather rude.
“I do still care about you, damn I still love you more every day. If there is anything I can do to make it up to you please let me know, I don’t want to have to live in a world where my last words to you made you cry. Obviously I would want a second chance at being the proper lover you deserve, but you’re in charge here. If you want me to walk out the door I will.”
There’s a hopeful look in his eyes making my heart beat erratically. In the past I would’ve instantly dropped to my knees, making sure every wish of his came true. I am no longer that girl.
“Tae it’s been months, you can’t just suddenly drop by and tell me you’re sorry. I spent days wondering why you broke up with me, wailing over the fact that you suddenly just didn’t care anymore, and even now you’re not giving me an answer. Why did you suddenly turn your back on me? Why did you not talk to me about whatever was bothering you? Even now you’re making me feel like you couldn’t trust me. Fuck, you just left me there like I was a piece of trash!”
What was once a hopeful look in his eyes, turned into defeat. He won’t give me an answer.
“You can’t just come in here exclaiming to love me after I’ve worked so hard to get myself over you. You can’t just come in here trying to steal my heart when I’m learning to give it to somebody else.”
“The blonde haired dude?”
Perhaps I shouldn’t feel a sense of accomplishment at the clear jealousy in his voice. However, this man did break my heart in two for apparently no reason. Is it weird I would want to get back at him a little?
“His name is Yejun and he’s a great guy. Look, just leave please. I have nothing more to say or hear. We’re done.” Turning away from him I mark the end of this conversation. It takes a while before there is any movement behind me. Slow steps make their way to the front door before pausing.
“I hope he treats you well, but I’m not going to simply give up on you like that.”
And secretly, I was hoping he wouldn’t.
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Two, three four days, before I realize it it has been an entire week since I last saw him. Some part of me is scared, scared that he has decided otherwise and I will never hear from him again.
I had told myself getting over him would be easy when I finally accepted the help of my friends, and for a while it was. Or so I thought, because the moment he walked in here I was right back to square one.
I’m in the middle of working on a new project when the doorbell rings. Standing up, I go to open the door wondering who it could be. If he had come back for me after all. Too bad I would soon be disappointed, as the man standing in front of my door was just an ordinary mailman.
“Umm I didn’t order anything?” My eyes fall on almost gigantic package behind the man. If I ordered some furniture I would’ve surely remembered right?
“Are you not y/f/n y/l/n?”
“No I am.”
“It clearly has your name and address on it miss.”
The building up confusion hasn’t left my head yet, but knowing there is nothing else I can do I decide to accept the package. After thanking the courier I close the door and carefully carry the big box into my living room.
The moment I open the big thing up, a bunch of big balloons float up to my low ceiling. There’s a transparent one with little hearts bouncing around inside, one that’s just one big heart itself, another one has the words ‘I love you’ written on it in a neat font. If I hadn’t checked my calendar this morning I would’ve thought it was valentine’s day.
Diving deeper into the box I find a relatively big fluffy teddy bear, hugging what seems to be a letter in a white envelope.
‘When I was 16 a miracle happened, I met the most beautiful girl. Me not being able to contain myself I immediately introduced myself to her. She said he name was y/n. I think it was back then that I decided her voice was my favourite. I was too much of a coward to ask her out at the time. I eventually did, though looking back I wish I did so sooner. There was never a boring day with her by my side.’
That’s all there is. Just a few words on an otherwise empty piece of paper. No signature at the bottom, no name, and still I knew exactly who wrote it.
The next day another package came in. This time a different set of balloons, a different stuffed animal, but the exact same white envelope.
 ‘When I was 22 my brother and his fiancée broke it off. Just like the piece of shit I have to call my dad he betrayed his partner’s trust, cheating on her without a second thought. My mother heard about it and accused both of us as being just like our father. You know after a while, I really started believing her.’
Each day a new box would come in, always containing a present with a letter attached.
‘I was terrified of hurting you, terrified of you seeing me the way my mom did, so I hid everything from you. I should’ve known that I can’t hide anything, you know me too well. I panicked and left you, the biggest mistake I could ever make. One that made everything that was already happening so much worse. I tried telling myself I didn’t need you, but I just couldn’t.’
I believed him, believed in the words he wrote down.
‘I’m so fucking sorry for everything I put you through. It’s all my fault and I’ll spend forever owning up to my mistakes. I love you and I don’t want to live without you. Please just give me one more chance to prove myself to you. One is all I need.’
I’m sorry Yejun, I can’t forget about him after all.
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Actually he should be the one who is nervous, and well maybe he is, but I’m the one standing on his front porch with my knees shaking and my heart beating right out of my chest. At one point I was even scared he would be able to hear me through the door.
Shaking my head I gather all the courage I can to knock on his door before I turn around and run back in the direction I came from. However, when I hear the sound of my fist on the hard wood I briefly still consider hiding somewhere.
Luckily I don’t get the chance to. While still going back and forth between the options staying or coming back some other time, the door creaks. I stiffly force my hands to stay still at my sides. The time it takes for the door to actually open seems like an entirety. If you were to count the passing seconds it would at most be like 5, which doesn’t sound like much, it feels like much.
“y/n?” His stance looks like a ‘what are you doing here?’, but his eyes give more of a ‘please say you’re here to forgive me’. Well, the latter would be right. “Can I come in?”
“Y-yeah of course.”
It’s not hard to notice that he is uncertain of his actions. It pleases me on one hand, as it gives me some sort of confirmation that he doesn’t want to make any more mistakes around me. On the  other hand, I don’t like seeing him uptight around me. I wish he was more comfortable when I’m near.
“I received the letters you wrote.” He knows I received his letters, he was the one who wrote them and sent them out. Surprisingly though, he almost audibly swallows at the information like he did something bad.
“Why couldn’t you tell me in person?” It takes me back to the day he suddenly landed on my doorstep. Even when I explicitly asked for it, he gave me nothing.
“I was scared, I couldn’t get the words out. I wasn’t at all prepared.” He takes a pause before continuing. “It’s not that I don’t trust you, I just didn’t know what else to believe at that point.”
Carefully, I reach out my hand to place on top of his laying on his lap. I don’t touch his skin yet, patiently waiting for him to give me some sort of consent. It comes in the form of him softly raising his hand to meet mine.
“I know, we all have our insecure times. You’re not obligated to tell me anything. I can’t and shouldn’t force you to. I’m sorry I doubted you. I was only upset about the way you left.”
“I know, I’m sorry. I thought that if your last memory of me was a bad one you’d forget me faster.”
It didn’t work the way he wanted it to, but he already knows. Already having been hit with that fact multiple times, I decide to spare him. I don’t mention it again.
“Did you ever stop loving me?” At the time it seemed like he did. Like he wasn’t simply acting, like those harsh words were what he truly felt. “Be honest please.” I don’t want any more lies. I’ll accept whatever comes out, even if it throws me right back to where I started.
“I-I don’t know… I really thought my mother was right. That what I had for you wasn’t what it seemed to be.” His gaze briefly drifts to the ground, before focussing on our touching hands. Like magic, the uncomfortableness he was feeling seems to shift. “No matter what she or I tried to convince myself of, something was always missing. I couldn’t put a mask over my own hurting and guilt anymore.”
He spoke the truth. Well at least I think he did. And so I accepted it.
“Okay, thank you for telling me.”
This talk was long overdue. Something we both needed and completely missed. No screaming, no crying, no accusing. If only it went this way from the start. We’re not all perfect though. Even if someone out there is, I’m not, he isn’t. They must be laughing at us.
“Your letters were cheesy. The gifts too.” I’m not sure if this is me trying to lighten the mood, or if I’m just stating facts. Regardless, it makes the both of us smile.
“I know. But you love cheesy things, like the roses I buy you on special occasions.” When he looks back at me I have to resist the urge to jump on him. The smile he wears look good on him. It’s been a while since I’ve seen it. “You know me too well.”
“Well did they work?”
I had already made up my mind a few days back. While staring at the floating balloons occupying my living room I had decided for myself that he’s worth it. He is.
Tilting my head up like I’m still thinking, I make clear ‘hmm’ sound. I had thought that the answer is quite obvious, seeing as I came to him myself, but when doubt takes away his smile I drop the act. I’ve been through enough. We’ve both been through enough.
“Yeah, yeah it did.”
Unlike myself, he doesn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around me. Burying his head in the crook of my neck like he used to do, he lets out a few low ‘thank you’s’. It doesn’t take me long to return the hug, feeling just as safe with him as I used to.
“What about.. Ah I forgot his name.” It’s not hard to guess who he’s hinting at, the sourness in his voice giving him away. I understand, I wouldn’t like it either.
“I ended things.” His answer just comes in the for of a small nod. There is no need for anything more.
“I honestly thought you were going to reject me again.” He ends his sentence with a chuckle and completely relaxes in my hold. Now that the tension is gone, we can go back to where we left off, slowly rebuilding what was lost.
“I was just playing with you, I’m sorry. But no more being an asshole okay? I promise I will kick your ass.” My giggling might undermine the threat a little to others. Luckily, he knows I’m serious.
“I will give you full permission to, but you’ll never have to. I’m going to dump so much love on you that you’ll regret ever even thinking about taking me back. You’re stuck with me now though, so you better be prepared.”
Pulling himself back a little, he plants a gentle kiss on my lips. And then another one, a second one, three more, each kiss more passionate than the last. A fire spreads throughout my body, burning away the few doubts I had left with success. Eventually, to my dismay, I have to pull back for air. Damn humans for needing oxygen.
“Oh? I’d like to see you try.”
Just in case you were wondering, I never did regret it.
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arofili · 4 years
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how’d u get into writing? like, writing fic and being part of the silm community, being Known, that stuff? i’m really new to being a silm cc and i’d love to know ur advice! also: how’d u build up the confidence to start posting meta/hcs? bc i have a Lot of hcs and meta ideas but also i’m really anxious abt posting them bc yknow anxiety is like that
these are some great questions, anon! I’m gonna go through them one by one :)
how’d u get into writing?
not to be like, super cliche, but I’ve...kind of always been a writer? as long as I can remember I’ve been telling stories, and when I was too young to read or write I would dictate them to my mom, who would type them up for me and help me choose clipart illustrations to accompany them. when I got old enough I would always be writing; I attempted my first novel at age 9, and while that never really went anywhere I did finish the darn thing and it had some pretty sophisticated plot twists for a 9-year-old!
like, writing fic
around the same time I got into fandom! I was deep into Warrior cats (like. really deep) and I believe I started writing my first fics when I was like? 10 or 11? my memory is kind of fuzzy on the order of things, but I know I got an account on the Warriors forums when I was 9, and that I was already posting my fic there when I made my FFN account. I believe I was 12 when that happened, but who knows. I haven’t the faintest idea of what happened with those forums, but uhhh pretty much all of my Warriors fic is still up on FFN lmao. you could probably find that if you want to but um...maybe don’t?
my first Big Fic was a self-insert of...my entire 5th/6th grade class into the then-current timeline of the Warriors books...well. I honestly think that might still be my most popular fic of all time l m a o though I try not to think about it because Hashtag Cringe. though as much as I look back on that time with a “yikes,” I am very grateful for the Warriors fandom in a way? that place was so accepting and encouraging of OCs, of AUs, of completely disregarding canon, of worldbuilding that is completely alien from canon - it was a fantastic sandbox to begin with, there were so many ways to write stories and practically all of them were accepted and had fellow fans invested in them!
and being part of the silm community, 
soooo I wrote Warriors fic until my freshman year of high school (wow sdjfhkdsjfh), which was when BOTFA came out, and I was absolutely wrecked by the ending and immediately started writing my own fixit fic. I was also super hooked on Kiliel! so that was my intro to the Tolkien fandom; and simultaneously, I joined tumblr, and, well, the rest is history tbh.
I honestly do not remember when I first read the Silm, but I kind of got into the more obscure parts of the Tolkien fandom through fandom osmosis, and I do have a vague memory of doodling the Finwean family tree in geometry class so it might have been later on in freshman year? that was also the same time I was having my Queer Awakening, and Russingon definitely contributed to me unlearning my internalized queerphobia, so probably around then.
anyway - queer awakening, tumblr, Tolkien, transitioning from FFN to AO3 - all of that was happening around the same time. I know I dipped my toes in the Silm fandom then, but I was still primarily a Hobbit fic writer focusing on Kiliel. toward the end of high school I kind of shifted to LOTR and (qp) Gigolas...but somehow the Silm fandom is the most active of the Big Three within the Tolkien fandom, and I was getting dragged further and further in.
it wasn’t until @backtomiddleearthmonth 2019, my freshman year of college, that I really dove into writing Silm fic! I picked some Silm-specific bingo cards and never looked back :D that was really not all that long ago but I am obsessed in a way I don’t really remember being even with TH/LOTR, I obviously cannot see the future but I anticipate hanging out here for a long time. the Silm fandom is great overall and there’s just so much material to work with!! <3
being Known, that stuff?
so I don’t really have a whole lot of context on how “well known” I am in the fandom?? definitely within the past year and a half or so I’ve noticed that I like, get asks like this, and get a significant amount of notes on my posts, and I’ve made a lot of fandom friends especially since I joined some Silm servers on Discord (hmu if you want invites; I’m on the SWG server and 2 general Silm servers and the Russingon server) this past year. and I have 3,000 followers as of this month - and while ever since I hit 1k I don’t particularly pay attention to my follower count I can definitely say that I have more engagement now than I used to! but it took me a long time to build this “audience,” I suppose; I’ve been around the Tolkien fandom since late 2014, so nearly 6 years of this, lol.
really the best way to build a following, in my experience, is to just post a lot of stuff. when I started making edits I got a lot more engagement, because for a long time I would post one every day! (I made them in batches and queued them; I didn’t actually make one every day lol...and now I’m too busy to do that, so I just make edits for events and whenever I feel like it) And I have [checks ao3] 145 works in the Silm fandom as of today - I’m fairly prolific! I’ve come to generally expect 3-10 comments on most of my oneshots, which is a lot more than I used to have back in the day. consistency and quantity are more likely to attract people to your work - and quality, of course.
also: how’d u build up the confidence to start posting meta/hcs?
I’ve been writing since I was very young, and I’ve been writing fic for like...11 years? I think? in that time I’ve produced a lot of garbage, but imo most of that was in my Warrior cats phase, so I came into the Tolkien fandom with confidence in myself and my writing. I’m also working on original fiction on the side (I hope to eventually become a published fantasy author, but right now school takes up most of my time that I don’t devote to fandom, which gives me more immediate gratification and also is just Very Fun) and I know I’m a good writer.
basically, I’ve been doing this for like...half my life, and I’m still fairly young, so I’ve had time to build up my skill and confidence and I know I’m only going to get better with time. you will get better with practice. like I said, I’ve written a lot of terrible stuff, and it’s only through sucking for a long time that I’ve gotten to the point I am now. and I am far from perfect; I know I still have lots of room to grow!
for meta and headcanons specifically, I started with writing fic, and then when I didn’t think I could stretch something into an entire fic I would just make a hc post. I have a vivid memory of writing my first meta in a notebook during driver’s ed because it was so goddamn boring and I had Thoughts about Tauriel and Thranduil!
in my experience, meta comes from having Opinions and wanting to share them and most importantly to back them up - you need to have sources! you need to have reasons! you need to have justification! otherwise it’s not meta, it’s a headcanon or an AU. which is fine!! I love hc/AU!!! but they are not the same as meta, and I’m a stickler for being accurate when it comes to meta. if you have sources and shit to back you up, that will help you build the confidence to share your meta.
sharing disinformation and passing it off as meta instead of just coming out and saying this is a headcanon/baseless theory/AU or whatever is such a fandom pet peeve of mine; it’s not bad for something to not be Accurate! you just have to have that disclaimer - and even when you’re writing meta, you’re offering an interpretation of the text, and you need to acknowledge that other interpretations also exist and are valid.
um. I hope this answers your questions? and sorry for basically word-vomiting my entire life story, lol. this post got long; the main reason I’ve written so much fic is because I really just cannot shut up for the life of me. sooo if you can tear of that filter of being shy and just. say shit. you can go so far~!
OH and one more thing - I can’t believe I almost forgot this - but part of being a writer is participating in the community. this is code for LEAVE A DAMN COMMENT IF YOU LIKE A FIC. that’s how I made most of my fandom friends before Discord! I follow @ao3feed-silmarillion and stalk that blog for new Silm fics; I read the ones that interest me and comment on them.
I know this is not really the most common way for folks to find fic but it’s so rewarding to interact with new fic, new writers, new commentors, new stories - you can find gems that don’t rise to the top of the kudos/bookmark lists; you become friends with your fellow writers; you can watch people grow and change; you support smaller content creators. yeah, you might not be getting Just The Best Stuff, but it’s so so so worth it!!
and if you make friends in the comment section of other people’s fic - I guarantee you some of them will go to your AO3 profile and check out your fic, too! and they’ll leave comments! this is a fic community, and that’s what I cherish about fandom most of all, tbh.
anyway - again - sorry for rambling so much, but I hoped this helped! feel free to send in another ask, or to come talk to me off anon if you’d like! and definitely send me your stuff if/when you decide to share it; I would love to support you!!! <3
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Heyyy! It's mee~ Could you write some headcanons on how the brothers would react if MC was very affectionate towards them, please? Thank you💖
omg hii! thank you for being so sweet & being my first request haha ❤️
an affectionate mc coming right up!
(btw I didn’t know that you couldn’t save answers as a draft so I’m redoing this lmao I need to learn my ropes around here)
Lucifer
despite what many people believe this man loves affection
this boy is touch-starved
hug him, kiss him everywhere, rub his head & he’ll ironically be in heaven
won’t mind you holding his hand in public bc it lets people know you’re his but doesn’t like too much pda unless he instigates it
he loves seeing his brothers jealous (sadist nature) so the more affection around them the better!
but don’t be too clingy when he’s doing work/business because he’ll get frustrated
“I need to get this done, MC. I’ll tend to you when I’m done,”
But don’t let that deter you because he’ll gladly take some nice shoulder rubs or running your fingers through his hair while he works as long as you don’t do anything too distracting
he doesn’t get flustered easily but give him a back-hug in front of Diavolo will leave him very embarrassed while the prince chuckled and teases him about it
overall, luci is a soft boi that needs a lot of soft loving because he really just wants to relax but can’t because of his loyalty to Diavolo so it’s your job to help him do so!
but rile him up too much you’ll be met with an intimidating smirk and a commanding voice
get ready to finish what you started, MC 🤷🏻‍♀️
Mammon
oh boy, this greedy demon is a true tsundere so get ready for a lot of remarks he doesn’t really mean
when you guys first meet & get to know each other you’ll be met with the classic: “Hey, no touchin’! Grrr!”
But after your pact together he’ll be a flustered mess
The slightest hug, brush of your lips on his skin, or even a cute remark about him will leave him red-faced and stuttering
“O-Oi! What are ya doing?” But won’t even dream of pulling away
Loves it when you latch onto his arm in private or in public because it makes him feel needed
This baby needs praise, please give it to him!
Run your fingers through his hair & he’ll collapse into your lap for cuddles
Likes it when you show him affection in public but gets defensive when his brothers tease him
“O-of course I don’t like it! I’m just lettin’ them touch me because they want to so bad!” To his brothers but...
“Oi, I, um, didn’t mean what I said back there, alright? Touch me all ya want or whatever,” in private (you’ll have to strain to hear what he said because he’s mumbling it)
Gets easily jealous when you show affection to his other brothers
“Get your grubby hands off my human!”
Or “I’m your first so I don’t wanna see ya gettin’ all lovey-dovey with anyone else, got it?”
If you counter it by asking if he’s jealous, he’ll deny it to his grave but eventually will let up if you shower him with affection
All in all, Mammon is baby 🥺 praise & love him lots because he needs it even though he says some things that sounds egotistical he still needs more affirmations!
Leviathan
flustered 101 is taught by this boy, he is a mess when it comes to affection
touch-starved as well
show him any affection & he’ll just completely go red, cover his face, & go “AHHHHHHH!” until you stop haha
will eventually stop reacting like that once he gets more used to it though but his blushed cheeks will NOT go away whatsoever
pepper his face with kisses & hug him while he games! he’ll eventually become putty in your hands & will have to set aside the game (perfect for when you want attention)
“I can’t believe you’re kissing a worthless otaku like me!”
You threaten to stop if he keeps thinking of himself that way, so he slowly gets a bit more confident
A tsundere as well! Will definitely go “it’s not like I enjoy being touched by you, normie,” but quickly going “wait, i was kidding! don’t stop! ...please,”
Don’t even think about being affectionate towards anyone else in his presence because he is literally the Avatar of Envy
“It’s insanely not fair that MC gets to go with you instead!”
He’ll look at his brothers with a death glare & growl out “muriiiiiiiiii” if they’re too touchy or flirty
in conclusion, a red-faced tsundere who often talks in Yoda speech & is insanely adorable. please love him 🥺
Satan
this sly fellow will leave you flustered rather than the other way around
be affectionate to him & he’ll do the same back in a teasing manner
loves when you just quietly play with his hair, hands, or draw random doodles with your fingers on his back while he reads because it soothes him
unlike Lucifer, pda is not a problem for him, he actually enjoys it. jump on his back, give him infinite kisses, hold his hand, it doesn’t matter if people are watching because all he sees is you
doesn’t easily get jealous when you’re being affectionate with others but will snap if someone does the same to you (he’s the avatar of wrath after all)
gets childishly clingy if you give too much attention to animals despite loving them himself
he’s a soft, put-together boy who just likes to feel at ease & not angry all the time
Asmodeus
can’t beat this man when it comes to affection
show him any bit of love & he’ll do it back tenfold
oh you kissed him? get ready for a gentle & passionate make out sesh
hug? oh oops now he’s not letting you go
running your fingers through his hair? “only for you, darling, will I let someone mess up my hair,”
he just loves being touched by you because he’s not used to a touch filled with love rather than lust
will definitely drag you to his room & pamper you with self care no questions asked
the brothers literally gag at how affectionate you two are to each other
Asmo literally doesn’t know what privacy is because he will do every form of pda possible if you let him
you guys cuddle & just talk & talk about any gossip, rant, or just anything
any wholesome moment can become much more spicy if you want to though, he’ll jump at the slightest chance ;)
& in this essay I conclude that he is adorable & more than just a lusty demon, please give him more attention & a chance 🥺
Beelzebub
this man loves all forms of affection from you but mostly when you hug him & don’t let go
he’ll chuckle & gently pat your head or hold you tightly against him
if he really wants more, he will pick you up so your legs are wrapped around him and just nuzzle his face into your neck & will stand there until either you get tired or he gets hungry
Gladly let’s you ride his back anywhere and everywhere, sometimes you’ll be on there for so long he will forget & just walk around with you confused at the weird looks he gets
You get a front row seat of his eating habits while on his back
Definitely make sure to remind him you’re there when he’s about to fall backwards on his bed because you will get crushed
Gets flustered when you stand on your tippy toes to kiss him in public because he finds it too cute, he bends down all red-faced to meet you halfway
loves saying your kisses are “sweet” & really racking his brain on what it tastes like but eventually giving up & saying there’s nothing good enough to compare it to
loves it when you touch his hair or caress his face while he eats, he couldn’t be more at bliss
to tie this together, Beelie babe is adorable & accepts your affection with no problem bc hes baby & the sweetest 🥺
Belphegor
sleepy boi loves soft touches while he sleeps
hair touching, face caresses, gentle kisses, & he’ll be smiling in his sleep at the feeling
you think he’s a sleep but he’ll wake up and go: “why’d you stop? keep going,” & put your hand back on his head
this bratty demon really wakes up when you stop touching him for a millisecond but will sleep through an apocalypse, no kidding
constant cuddles & equally as affectionate as you, literally will latch onto you & not let go
likes to tease and go “you think I enjoy that?” When you touch him but when you pull back & get flustered/embarrassed he’ll go: “I do, I also don’t remember telling you to stop,” with that sweet but smug smile of his
has slight soft yandere tendencies when it comes to jealousy, will literally death glare everyone but quickly smile all lovey-dovey at you if you look at him
In closing, he’s a cute sleepy yandere boi who loves to tease & be lazy
I hope this was good for my first request! thank you so much! 🍓
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franeridart · 4 years
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Anon said: How are you just like "Oh these are just some warm up sketches" and post a full finished piece, while I'm over here sketching a triangle person and calling it a finished piece.
I dunno if this was a legit question asking for a legit answer, but I do happen to have a legit answer so I might as well give it! If I wanted to go into detals with it it’d take me forever though, so allow me to separate it into two points to make it easier
I learnt how to be very fast in putting down my lines and trained myself into not overthinking every single dot I put down. This took about five or six years of drawing daily and a whole life of drawing occasionally before then, because to do so you need to reach a point where you’re drawing something you’ve drawn so many times that by now your hand sort of goes without you needing to think about it much, so it’s not a fast process, but boy is it worth it. Mostly learning how to not overthink it, overthinking it used to be 90% of my time spent on a drawing and dear god did it suck the joy out of everything I drew
I have two very distinctive ways of approaching a drawing, one where I actually put effort in it and the other where I just want to let the squiggles out of my pen, and warm ups are the second one - the lack of effort I’m putting in can have different forms and show in different ways, so a warm up could be a fully colored piece as it could be just a pencil doodle, depending on where and on what exactly I’m being lazy: it could be the type of tool I’m using that allows me to draw without having to line, it could be a very tiny canvas that lets me avoid a ton of details a big canvas would demand. I might be cutting the time I usually put in making sure my anatomy is correct, I might be using a shading technique that takes a tenth of the time my usual one would, I might be using a style that’s just easier and faster to draw, or drawing characters I’ve drawn a trillion times in extremely generic poses and clothes. There’s a lot of things that I can do to make things faster for me! It’s skills you gain as you draw a lot - you learn how to draw things the hard way, and then you realize that along the way you learnt how to do them the easy way too
hope this actually answers your question! If it was a question at all lol if it wasn’t then sorry for rambling, please pretend I didn’t say anything hahaha
Anon said: I love your newest comic!!! So adorable!! I noticed Bakugou's mom does the affectionate hair rustle thing to him in the manga/anime, do you think Bakugou subconsciously does the same to show affection cause of it? I love the way you draw faces and poses, it's so expressive!!
Ahhhhh thank you so much!!! And yeah, it might be! After all we do take a lot from the people we live with even without realizing, and he’s already so similar to his mom!
Anon said: I saw your bakushima comic from October 9th (2019) where Bakugo falls asleep studying and Kirishima sets him down on the table properly and it was so soft my heart is crying
;;;;; !!!!!!!! I’m glad you liked it!! <3<3
Anon said: If it not to much, could I possibly get a Ochamina doodle pls? I just love some sweet lesbeans 👉👈
Awww I’m not taking requests right now, but I’ll keep it in mind for next time I want to doodle and don’t know what!
Anon said: I love your art! I envy you.
Please don’t! There’s a lot of reasons why being me isn’t a lot of fun - if it’s just my skill you envy, then all you gotta do is draw a lot! 
Anon said: i just went through your entire kiribaku tag and omg it was beautiful seeing the progression in your art skills but still keeping the same funny/cute/heartwarming/etc traits you thought up for their dynamic!! i hope that makes sense haha !! love your art keep it up
It does make sense!!! Thank you so much both for looking through the whole tag and for thinking so, it means a lot to me!! ;;; <3<3
Anon said: Hey fran! I hope you're doing well(especially with quarantine and all)!! I really love your anatomy and how fluid and stylistic it can be! It's super fun to look at! I wanted to ask you if you ever did any in depth studies on anatomy? Like muscles and bones. I've heard a lot of artists mention the necessity of studying bones/muscles, i'd really like to know your opinion on the subject
Ahhh god thank you so much!! And... hmm let’s see if I can word this properly and have it make sense - always keeping in mind that this is just my opinion, of course!
If all you want to do is to draw, then all you need to do is to pick up your pencil and draw - it’s really that easy as far as I’m concerned. You don’t need to know anatomy in depth to just draw, everyone has seen a person, everyone knows how a person looks. That is, if all you want to do is to draw for the sake of drawing. If you want to draw an anatomically correct looking human being, though, you do need to know how anatomy works - and the deeper you’ll go into studying it the more correct your people will look. It’s kind how everyone can draw a bicycle, but if you want to draw a realistic bicycle you’re gonna need to look up references for it, you know? It’s all on the level at which you’re interested in drawing, the more technically skilled you want to be the more you’ll have to study
As for my personal experience with this, I hate studying with a passion. Studying puts a damper on my enjoyement of everything, and drawing isn’t excluded from this - you put a book in front of me expecting me to study it and suddenly I never want to pick up a pencil again. This means that I never sat down and studied anatomy in depth and all in one go just to learn how to draw a human being, but it doesn’t mean that I didn’t, slowly and now and again and in bits and pieces, study parts of the body to get a better understanding of it. I know better about the skeleton than I do about muscles, and I still have enough to learn about everything that anyone who’s studied anatomy properly would find a trillion mistakes in everything I draw, but my way of going about drawing has always been and always will be putting my enjoyement of it first and foremost, so I’m not interested in putting myself through a tour-de-force to learn everything there is to know about anatomy just to make my doodles look appealing to someone with a medical degree haha I’m just doing me, and when the mood is right I look up how to properly draw something, but until then I just do it as best as I can with my limited knowledge, being fully aware that what I’m producing is far from accurate but being willing to make that compromise for my own comfort
So that’s my opinion on it lol it all boils down to how important it is for you to know how to properly draw the human body - of course it’s gonna look more professional and better if you’ve studied it, but everyone has their own priorities, you know?
Anon said: Thank you for your hard work, seeing an upload from you is so nice, and the colors are so pretty
Thank you so muuuuccchhhhh!!!! TTATT <3<3<3
Anon said: Opinions on Tokoyami Fumikage 💕
One of my top faves in the whole manga, actually! I have a drawing in the making of him, I should get back to it..........
Anon said: HOLY SHIT FRAN THE TOES HOW YOU DRAW THE TOES SO WELL FEET ARE THE DEATH OF ME AND YOU’RE OVER HERE DRAWING TOES THEY’RE SO GOOD PLEASE TEACH ME YOUR WAYS!!! -❤️
Thank you!!!!!!!! So pretty much my way of learning this specific skill was being obsessed with elves when I was fifteen and wanting to draw them all the time  and also for whatever reason being convinced that they were not supposed to wear shoes so I just drew a lot of feet with references and tutorials and stuff till I could draw my elves properly. Which isn’t necessarily what you need to do to learn how to draw feet, but, I mean, it worked for me lol
Anon said: I love ur Bnha ships and all but what would u do if some of them didn’t become canon??
Oh, I actually don’t care about that at all? I don’t expect most of them to become canon anyway - like, ochadeku sounds reasonable and kamijirou seems to be getting there, but everything else I never even considered it as an actual possibilily. I don’t really ship because I want to see my ships become canon, I just like the potential in what I can make with them? If that makes sense? They’re just fun to think about and I like making fancontent, that’s all there is to it really haha honestly if I had my way no ship would ever be canon ever ha ha ha
Anon said: Slep is for the wek
No actually sleep is for Frans who want a chance at getting up tomorrow morning without an headache for once, so I should do that and go to sleep already lmao
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riarushi · 4 years
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nct as cousins.
❥ genre- serious crack, fluff ❥ word count- 1.7k
Alternatively titled “NCT at Family Gatherings”. I think the universe wanted me to write this? Thank you to markleeholdingthings on Instagram for helping me out! (We made the most basic family dynamic on the planet.) ~Ness
➵ 
Taeil
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Talks to the adults and enjoys it.
Some of the babies originally thought he was their uncle. 
Not necessarily close with any of his cousins except the older ones that took care of him growing up.
The younger ones aren’t too familiar with him since he doesn’t talk to them, but he likes to give them little trinkets when he sees them. 
Will offer to supervise the kiddos if they want to go outside. 
Has a music degree (big no no in this stereotypical family) and works in music production.
Johnny
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The cousin that’s stuck in college, everyone loves him but the adults don’t think he is a good life example to the youngsters.
Second favourite of the adults (because the favourite has a degree and a job).
Likes talking w his fellow millennials while sipping his wine
He likes to give advice to high school cousins.
The baby cousins fear him :( He smiles at them lots and gets them the best presents to make up for it. 
Is probably still in college because he doesn’t want to join the adult table.
Taeyong
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Taeyong likes the babies. 
He’ll sit them on his lap while he talks to the adults, making sure to play with them a bit so they don’t get bored. 
If they do anyway, he’ll get up and carry them back to the rest of the cousins, chatting with them for a while. 
The adults think he would make a great father. (Some of the nosy aunts and uncles like asking about his love life lmao) 
He treats the cousins around his age or older with respect. 
Overall everyone likes him because he’s happy to talk and easy to get along with.
Yuta
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A social genius, he tailors his approach perfectly for every generation.
Has to greet every single child at the reunion before doing anything else. 
Every moment you look at him, there’s a different youngster in his arms and he’s high-fiving a different high schooler. 
Well-mannered with the adults and friendly with cousins of all ages. 
The high school-aged cousins love that he doesn’t treat them like angsty teenagers and he’s become a favourite among them.
Not jobless, to the relief of the parents.
Kun
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Kun is the favourite, the cousin everyone gets compared to. 
He’s always busy working so he’s usually late to family gatherings. 
Is basically whisked away by the adults immediately to talk about adult things. 
He asks high school cousins “How’s school?”. Chill with them because he saw them grow up.
Has a huge soft spot for the baby cousins.
He’ll be in the middle of a conversation and drop everything when they tug on his sleeve.
Doyoung
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Quiet, he does and talks about anything but only when he’s prompted.
He’s as successful as Kun, but not as sociable. 
Sits beside his parents most of the night and minds his own business. 
Doyoung’s awful at supervision. 
He just sits there and watches the kids make chaos.
His relatives get shocked when they see him outside of gatherings acting casually with his coworkers/friends.
Ten
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He just got out of college but decided to take a year break before looking for a job. 
Is a kid favourite. 
Even though he’s one of the older cousins, he’s the most “hip with the kids”.
Teaches them how to cheat on tests and in general, be an awful student. 
Ten does not enjoy the adult table.
All the parents think he’s talented and has a lot of potential but will he!! Stop ruining their children’s minds!!!!! 
He only gets friendly with the older cousins when he’s wine drunk. 
Has never met the baby cousins. (The adults are sheltering them from the chaos that is Ten at family gatherings.)
Jaehyun
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Jaehyun starts off by greeting the adults and being the sweetheart he is.
The adults always want to know about his love life because “Our nephew is very handsome, no?”
Hangs out with the older cousins later, drinking beer and chatting away like best friends.
He enjoys watching them fight with each other. 
Probably the youngest at his table, gets teased quite a bit. (”Yoooooo, Yoonoh’s growing up!”)
The younger kids aren’t really familiar with him.
Winwin
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The favourite among the youngest cousins. 
They get excited to see him every time he arrives at family gatherings. 
Participates in their games (They like making him count for hide and seek.) and sits with them while eating. 
He spends very small amounts of time with the adults, quickly answering any questions they have about his life. 
The older cousins think he’s cute :( 
After the little ones go home, he watches whatever drinking game his generation has gotten into.
Jungwoo
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Jungwoo is a free soul.
He’s just there to entertain himself, watching whatever cartoon the little ones are watching.
When they turn around and see a grown man on the couch, they’re a bit startled.
The adults think he enjoys taking care of the kids, but no. The boy is there to watch Tom and Jerry for his own enjoyment. 
Nobody remembers that he’s an engineering student, one moment he’s watching Blue’s Clues and the next he’s leaving to finish an assignment for class. 
The high schoolers try to ask him for advice, but he just says “I literally don’t know what I’m doing.”
Lucas
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This boy walks into every family gathering dressed like he’s gonna be on a runway. 
Enjoys talking to the high schoolers about how their school’s changed since he graduated. 
Other than them, he joins any conversation on invite. 
The youngsters climb him like he’s a playground item. 
There’s just kids hanging off him while he laughs at some joke his uncle made. 
Sometimes, they shout “Big brother Yukhei!” into his ear and he just pats their head silently before continuing on with his business.
Mark
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Follows his parents around.
He’s wrapped up in his own thoughts instead of whatever his mom is talking about with his relatives.
I’m kinda hungry, should I grab that cookie? I’m gonna grab that cookie. 
At some point, his parents get fed up with him “acting like an eight year old,” so he gets sent to play with his fellow cousins. 
Asks for the WiFi password and then sits on the couch all night scrolling through his phone. 
He doesn’t talk to his cousins because he never knew how to.
Xiaojun
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A sweetheart with the most patience. 
Same question from every single adult about school? No problem, he’ll answer it as many times as he needs to. 
The youngsters like to pull pranks on him because they know he won’t scold them afterwards.
“Did we get you good, Dejun-ge?” “Yeah, I almost had a heart attack, haha.” 
Helps the babies get food. 
Just has a great family bond with everyone.
Hendery 
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Hendery likes to look for the older cousins that take care of him, initiating conversation.
If they’re busy or stop talking to him, he goes to the crowd of younger cousins on the couch and chills with his phone.
Occasionally, he’ll show them all some memes he has.
“Haha, guys look at this one.”
Mimics the children screaming in the background to get some chuckles from them, too. 
The adults don’t think much of him, he’s a chill kid doing his thing.
Renjun
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He’s quiet and polite for the most part, especially towards the adults.
With his cousins, he jumps in to say one-line roasts about people mentioned in conversation and then goes back to being silent.
They might say something like “My school friends are so weird!” and Renjun simply replies with “Makes sense why you’re friends, then.” 
One of the baby cousins likes to hug his leg, and he smooths their hair or holds their cheek absentmindedly.
An art major, but the adults aren’t worried since he’s smart. 
When alone in a room, he’s doodling on some scrap paper he found.
Jeno
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Close with the cousins around his age.
Has a group chat with them and texts them to come to the living room. 
When they arrive he just goes “Wanna play Spaceteam?”
He plays party games with them for the rest of the night. 
If the other cousins want to join in, he’ll teach them how to play. 
The adults don’t think much of him, they usually just ask how he is and he replies with “Good!” and a smile.
Haechan
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Haechan is The Annoying Cousin™. 
He comes off as very cold and bitchy usually. 
At family gatherings, he participates in games and gets overly competitive.
WILL cheat or flip the table, causes all the chaos.
The parents aren’t a fan of him, the kids either love him or hate him.
Older cousins think he’s entertaining lmao
Jaemin
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Normal until some random kid screams his name. 
From then on he is in full kindergarten teacher mode.
Brings an entire crowd of noisy toddlers to the tables and everyone is just in shock. 
His older cousins know he’ll come around and chat with them once the kids go home, so they save him a bottle when he gets there. 
The adults have a good image of him: handsome, smart, charming. They think he’ll get married early. 
It’s a celebration if his mom announces he’s seeing someone.
Yangyang 
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Starts heated debates among his cousins. 
If he’s in the zone and an older cousin tries to put an educational twist on the argument, he’ll start bullying them out of the room.
“From what I learnt in college--” “THIS IS A DEBATE AMONGST THE YOUTH.”
Two seconds later, he’s back to being friendly and cheery, talking casually and normally. 
The adults don’t believe their children when they tell them what happened upstairs with Yangyang. 
They think he’s the sweetest kid of the bunch.
Chenle 
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Chenle is just comfortable and gets absorbed in the atmosphere.
“Chenle, go play with your cousins.” “Hey guys! My mom said to play with you”. 
All his cousins get along with him. 
He thinks the baby cousins are cute and will baby them. 
Lets them sit on his lap while he plays card games. (Probably lets them choose cards for him sometimes, too.) 
Youngest of his generation, everyone loves him to pieces.
Jisung
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He does not want to be at the family gatherings. 
Awkwardly trails his parents because he doesn’t know what to do. 
Has to be pushed towards the food by relatives and just goes “Oh. Um, okay.” 
The older cousins ruffle his hair and ask him, “Aye, Jisung! How’s school?” “I-It’s good...” 
The younger ones do not find him approachable. 
Asks his parents when they’re going home as soon as 9 PM hits.
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