#I have like 7 backup saves for every game I play

[jumpywhumpywriter]

"The Lost Hero" - Crippled Hero Presumed Dead part 7

Warnings: dehumanization, humiliation, forced begging, crippled hero, hero with disabilities, retired hero, reluctant hero, Supervillain final battle

Hero is at Supervillain's mercy... what lengths will Logan go to to save her?

Tears of pain mixed with panic spilled from Hero's eyes as her struggles slowed. She was suffocating. Thrashing turned into weak twitching as she lost strength, feeble muscle spasms wracking her body.

She was going to die. Right here on the cold concrete.

"STOP!" Supervillain's head snapped to the side at the loud shout, brow furrowed in confusion and anger at the interruption.

"Don't kill her! Please!" It was Logan, snatching Supervillain's attention as he thoughtlessly ran toward him and Hero. But he had no idea what he planned to do when he reached them. All he knew was that he couldn't stand by and watch Hero die in front of him without at least trying to help.

Supervillain didn't take his boot off Hero's chest, but did take his finger off the button, letting Hero breathe again. He stared at Logan with one eyebrow arched at his boldness.

Logan's eyes found Hero's, and he watched as she mouthed a single word to him:

Run.

But Logan didn't run. He wouldn't run, not with Hero's life hanging in the balance. Hero had saved the city so many times in the past... he couldn't leave her to die like this. This time, Hero was the one who needed saving.

But how on earth was a normal city boy like him supposed to take on someone as dangerous and powerful as Supervillain? Sure, Hero had taught him some basic fighting tricks... but Supervillain was skilled, had far more battle experience than him.

Supervillain slowly tilted his head to the side like a predator locking sights on prey, studying Logan through narrowed eyes. His gaze was sharp and assessing as it swept over him.

"...And what could you possibly offer me in exchange for sparing my enemy?" He drawled. The unmistakable edge of sarcasm leached into his tone. He had no intention whatsoever of considering a bargain with Logan, but he was interested in hearing what lengths a measly citizen like him would go to save Hero. It was all a game to him, with people as pawns.

Logan knew this, but he decided to play the risky gamble anyway. He needed to buy time. For what, he didn't know. There was no backup team coming. No police. The most he would achieve is delaying the inevitable. But still... he'd try his best, like he always did.

"I-I... I could offer myself to you," Logan blurted frantically. "I would obey your every wish, your every whim. Imagine how... f-fun that would be... f-for you..." His voice came out shaky and thin with fear, his mouth dry and rough as sandpaper. He decided to appeal to Supervillain's sadistic and twisted way of toying with people.

Supervillain gave him a saccharine smile. "Yes, that would certainly be... fun, as you say."

Hero caught her breath, and growled hatefully. "Logan, don't even think ab--" Supervillain didn't even glance at Hero when he pushed the button again for a few long seconds. When he released it, Hero's mouth stayed shut. Supervillain gestured down at her. "See, now this would be fun," he purred. "Having you at my feet, so easily trainable. Like a dog. Hero is a perfect example; it only took her a few tries to get the hang of it. I wanted silence from her, and now silence is what I have. Easy."

Hero bared her teeth, opening her mouth to snap at him, but clearly thought better of it, and her jaw clicked shut. She glanced apologetically at Logan, panicked but guilty.

I'm sorry I can't win this one, the look meant. I'm sorry I put you in this position with Supervillain.

Logan broke eye contact first, fixing his attention back on the menacing Supervillain himself, dark and dangerous as ever.

"I could be... a good dog..." he breathed, his voice barely a whisper on a breath of air. He was disgusted with himself for saying such vile, messed-up things, but he swallowed his pride, remembering why he was even doing this.

Because time. He needed time.

"Ah, so the young man has a spine," Supervillain teased. "It takes courage to stand in my presence unflinchingly. If circumstances were different, I am certain we could have made wonderful allies." Logan couldn't help the full-body shiver that ran through him at that.

"And where do dogs belong?" Supervillain asked innocently. He was clearly enjoying the show Logan was putting on.

"I-In doghouses...?" Logan guessed shakily.

"No. They belong at my feet, as lesser beings. Obedient. And submissive." Supervillain snapped his fingers, pointing at the floor in front of him at Hero's side where he had her pinned down with a boot. "Down, dog. Beg. Me. To spare. Hero's. Life."

Logan hesitated, swallowing hard, reluctant to get too close to Supervillain, within striking range.

Supervillain smirked cruelly, remote in hand. Hero started choking again.

"Wait!" Logan immediately dropped to all fours with a scared shiver, watching Hero gasp and cough as Supervillain let her go again. He crept forward on hands and knees with a genuine whimper of fear until he was right next to Hero, close enough to see her dilated pupils, the blood snaking from both corners of her mouth. The shoelaces and leatherwork on the boot keeping her down. On the opposite side from Supervillan. He bowed his head once he'd reached her side, hoping it was enough to please Supervillain.

"Lower," Supervillain growled, and Logan jumped at how close the terrifying voice was. He didn't hesitate this time to drop himself low enough that his forehead touched the ground, curving his back in an unnatural position that made his spine ache. But it somewhat resembled a canine with tail tucked between its legs. Ironic, because that's exactly how Logan felt right now. Terrified of a master's wrath. Begging for mercy, or a shred of pity.

“P-Please, s-sir," he croaked, his whole body shaking. "P-Please don't--" a gasp of pain left him when a rough hand fisted in the hair of his scalp, holding tightly and wrenching his head back. Supervillain was leaning over Hero's prone form to reach him, his face inches from Logan's.

"Speak. Up." Supervillain's voice snarled.

Logan licked his lips nervously and tried again. "Please don't kill Hero," he managed to say.

"And are you mine, pet? Will you be good and obedient for me, no matter what I ask of you?"

"...Yes."

"What did you say?"

"Yes! I-I'm your... pet." Logan cringed, breathing fast and ragged as the hand in his hair retreated. Supervillain leaned back up straight, expression amused and satisfied as he nodded to himself. Logan braced himself for Supervillain to finally kill him, when a clammy hand suddenly grabbed his, and his gaze flicked over to Hero's face as she touched him.

"Thank you for the time you bought me," she whispered in that familiar raspy voice of hers. Logan noticed her eyes were glowing brighter than usual. "...Goodbye."

Logan barely registered it when Hero's hand let go of his and shot out to punch him hard in the chest, sending him rolling across the ground a good several feet away. He pulled himself up into a sitting position, pain firing through his entire torso, but watched on in horror as Hero grabbed Supervillain's leg with both hands, her eyes flashing even brighter. She'd shoved him out of range to save him from what came next.

A wailing scream of agony shattered the air as Hero pumped every ounce of power she had out of her all at once, concentrating it in her palms. Her whole body almost seemed to glow for an instant as she screamed, power tearing her apart inside as it ripped loose and slammed into Supervillain full-force. White-hot electricity blasted every inch of Supervillain's body, and his scream wove into Hero's as flesh sizzled and burned with the scorching heat. Logan could feel it all the way from where he'd ended up, the air superheated and blazing.

Supervillain shrieked and convulsed as the energy coursed through him in a blast of blinding light and wild, untamed power. Hero's cry suddenly choked out, even as the flow of power still melted the skin from Supervillain's body.

It felt like forever, but it must have lasted five seconds. Logan blinked spots from his vision, staring wide-eyed at the massive scorch marks in the concrete turning everything around Hero solid black, even the tip of Logan's shoe where the electricity had barely fallen short of consuming his leg. His heart froze when his gaze landed on the two unmoving figures in the center of it all, a charred corpse crumpled on top of a mostly-untouched Hero. Everything was quiet. Too quiet.

⏪️ Back Next ⏩️

Masterlist

@scoundrelwithboba @lumpofsand @isikedmyself878 @iamheretohurt @fleur-a-whump

@ay5ksal @otterfrost @sausages-things @i-don't-know-sal

[ageless-aislynn]

Hey, friends. Just wanted to say bye for now. I'm tired of fighting to no avail. If I can fix the computer eventually, then yay. But I'm tired of hours of research, hours of repair, all to seem like it worked and then something else crashes. For example, Steam/Halo has been working fine this whole time then tonight, it went absolutely nuts. Steam started updating in the middle of my Halo game. Then it wouldn't stop updating even after rebooting. Then it crashed every time I tried to load it again. I spent a LONG time reading debugging logs, tracking down key phrases and words, all to eventually come around to... Other people have had that happen but nobody seems to know why. All my drivers are updated. I've tested for program conflicts. Windows passed all of its tests. The computer hardware passed all of its tests. I'm just stumped.

Then as suddenly as this storm of blue screens (5 of them just tonight) came on, they stopped. I can launch and play Halo fine. For now.

I've had honestly had enough, so I'm going to take an offline vacation for however long I need to. I'm still writing the next chapter of "15 Minutes" but just by hand because it's too nerve-wracking to try and write on a device that suddenly BAM is dead and you never know when it's going to happen or if you managed to save what you just wrote in time.

That's another thing, I put all 7 drafts of this chapter on this computer from my backups, I started writing the 8th and went back to continue it... and the last 6 drafts are just gone. I mean, I looked everywhere. I cannot for the life of me figure out what caused them to vanish. I didn't do anything to roll the computer back that should've done that. Fortunately, I'd copied that last 8th draft into a Google doc so was able to get a new copy and didn't lose half the chapter. But now I feel so stressed writing, like... Will it be here when I get back? Will something eat it again? What ate it in the first place?

Eventually, if I can finish it, I'll transcribe it up and hopefully get to post it. I also hope to be back to enjoy the new season of Halo with y'all in Feb. That would be cool but I don't know if it's meant to be or not.

Anyway, feel free to still @ me and message if you'd like but I don't know when I'll be able to check in, so please forgive me if I seem to not respond for an unusual amount of time. I'll miss you. I miss you already. Sending you much love and well wishes. Hope to see you again before long.

[moonndust]

gonna put out my honest thoughts about my current progress in fire emblem engage bc i need to talk about how silly this game is

i’m only at chapter 7-8 btw and i’ve already spoiled myself half of the plot

i couldn’t choose between f!alear or m!alear bc their designs were.. something. i chose f!alear for my first run since i did the “same ingame gender as irl gender” thing (and it was an entire tradition for me at some point).

didn’t even reach chapter 6 and f!alear’s design was too much for me. i liked seeing her in a ponytail tho but i was not gonne be patient enough to change her class JUST for the ponytail. like girlie ik ur the divine dragon n shit but atleast try to not get your long ass hair pulled midway in battle.

and wtf is your armor??? you have individual boob cups for what?? your entire outfit does not look an ounce comfortable and yet you still slept in that shit. the short ass skirt too?? the stocking things??? there are like 10 design atrocities and i could even name more (and that’s just on a scale of practicality)

made a new save file and chose m!alear bc i was getting tired of f!alear’s entire armor outfit. ngl i preferred playing as m!alear bc he felt a lot more comfortable playing as an mc. but his entire victorian child fit wasn’t the best but it was more practical than the boob cups.

still mad there’s no unisex mcs.

anyways the prologue was kinda funny. our ass just wakes up and suddenly the world is in shambles bc some salty ass kingdom made sombron become the second coming of jesus christ.

queen lumera only had like.. 2 seconds of screentime until the ultimate mentor/parent death trope scene bc dead parental figures are a must for fire emblem mcs (unless ur sigurd and become the dead parent)

the firene siblings appeared. albert is precious and céline is lowkey on thin ice because of that damned outfit. like maybe wear something more practical in battle other than easy hair pulling and frilly dress?? (i know i can change her class but i’m a lazy bum). im still currently trying to know my way around albert’s skill set but he’s a good unit atm.

the twins are splendid little creatures. clanne got too many mvps and is still on the mvp streak ever since i paired him with celica (i abused warp ragnarok too many times). framme is just there for moral support and actual healing support.

vander’s lvl 1 grandpa ass was actually doing decent damage comapred to lvl 6 alear. you don’t know how many times vander had to come in clutch when alear was 3 hp away from evaporating.

i paired albert w/ sigurd and clanne w/ celica. that shit was game changing. i revoked céline’s emblem privileges for no reason. i just gave celica to clanne since he technically did more damage. he is like low tier but he’s my biggest carry atm. how the turns have tabled.

i changed alcryst’s class to tireur d’élite the second i got his lvl 10 ass. i’m pretty sure he might be my strongest unit atm (lvl wise).

idk who i should pair micaiah with so i just let her stay with yunaka. i never rlly used micaiah’s abilities for healing but i only used her to widen yunaka’s range w/ magic if she needed to chip in some damage to an enemy.

i always get tired at like the 7th turn in every battle and I just abuse celica’s warp ragnarok to beat up that one enemy to win the battle. somehow clanne still deals big damage w/o the engage boosts.

listen i have no clue what they fed the stewards but i am now afraid of them with my every being.

jean and anna r just there. jean doesn’t do shit bc i alr have framme. ik that jean might be decently better than framme but i don’t want his lvl 1 ass dying every single time. anna is a pretty good backup for chain attacks actually. but everytime i see her i get reminded of her commander version from heroes (bc it was my first fe game)

i spent the good majority of my bond fragments on arena emblem bonds w/ my current lineup bc i gotta get those big boi skills n shit. i also watched my units kill each other bc ig that’s a thing now. (i witnessed alcryst beat the shit out of céline)

sommie is a silly little fart.

still waiting on the day i get lucina’s emblem. i want to witness a gang fight.

outside of all the cutscenes, the game has the animation budget of 2 dollars.

i feel like i should make a seperate post on fe13 design atrocities and impracticalities (im bad at character design)

[eggman-is-fat-mkay]

You don't necessarily need a PC either. I hacked my 3DS a few years back using the SD card slot on my phone.

Advantages of jailbreaking your 3DS include:

Remove the region lock allowing you to play cartridges and eShop games from outside your region

Play games/ports/emulators and use applications the community has developed (there are really good native ports of Sonic Mania and Half-Life 1, assuming you can look past the loading times, and there's a port of Sonic Robo Blast 2 (3D sonic fangame that's low key better than all official 3D sonic games) that plays in 3D)

Install community-created home menu themes from https://themeplaza.art/ and create your own custom ones using Usagi Theme Editor

Copy your physical DS and 3DS games onto your SD card as digital copies and have them show up as regular icons on your homescreen so you can finally stop worrying about losing the cartridges

Create backups of your save games, and copy savegames from digital copies to physical cartridges, or vice versa, or from one cartridge to another

(Optional) Set a PIN lock on your 3DS that must be entered before it will turn on

(New 3DS only) Overclock the 3DS's processor to make demanding games less laggy

(New 3DS only) Send a screen capture stream via Wi-Fi to your PC where it can then be recorded or streamed to Discord/Twitch/etc., no need for an emulator

Install mods/romhacks (I've heard good things about Pokemon Shattered Sapphire and Ruined Ruby, and there's a really cool mod for MarioKart 7 called CTGP-7 that more than triples the number of tracks in the game. Some of the ones it adds are even good!)

Install save file editors for games like Pokemon and Animal Crossing that let you give yourself whatever items/stats you want

Use gameshark codes in your 3DS games, cartridge or digital (one of the homebrew apps the tutorial has you install comes with a list of every Gameshark code ever made for the 3DS, and all you have to do is turn them on)

and, of course, piracy (I'll have a whole section on that down below)

Disadvantages of jailbreaking your 3DS include

Nothing

Literally nothing at all

Jailbreaking is free and 99% of the software you will install is open source

You can still play games online download updates from the eShop, and even install new firmware versions after jailbreaking

All of your games, home menu themes, and save data will be exactly where you left them

Every single thing you could do on your 3DS before jailbreaking works exactly the same after

The main home menu/interface of the 3DS does not change at all -- all of the added functionality comes from the new apps it has you install and the Rosalina hacks menu you can open by pressing a key combo.

Sold yet? Great! Head on over to https://3ds.hacks.guide, follow all the instructions they give you, then come back here. I mentioned piracy earlier, and there are a few more apps you'll need to install if you want... the full experience.

there's a homebrew app you can install called hShop, which contains all content ever released on the eShop in every country the 3DS released in, AND every cartridge exclusive game AND every demo cartridge (the versions of games you'd have played if you walked up to a 3DS in a store) plus a few fan translations for the foreign-language-only titles and a few homebrew apps, all available for free. The 3DS's wifi chip is a little slow for downloading games, though, and there's a desktop app you can use to download games from your PC and then copy them onto the SD card that runs *way* faster than FBI does. I'll make a tutorial on using that if anyone's interested.

You can also install TWiLightMenu++ to play .nds ROMs straight from your SD card, no need for a flashcart, along with a cutesy little file browser styled after the DSi Menu (theme customizable). You can download a ROM file of every DS game ever released from archive.org, here. there's currently no way to browse that library from the 3DS itself, unfortunately, so you'll have to download them from your PC. it doesn't really matter where you put the files since TWiLightMenu will be able to find them regardless, but the default location is SD root/roms/nds/)

you can also install openAGBfirm to play GBA ROMs off your SD card using the 3DS's little-known GBA compatibility mode. Since they run natively rather than using software emulation, they run in full speed with perfect compatibility (assuming your GBA ROM is 32MB or smaller to fit within the 3DS's RAM and doesn't have any extra hardware like WarioWare's tilt sensor/rumble pack or or Boktai's light sensor). The downside is that since this isn't an emulator, you can't create savestates, and closing the clamshell doesn't pause the game. (This one comes as a FIRM file rather than a homebrew app, so you'll need to extract the .firm file into SD root/luma/payloads/, and you access it by holding the start button while turning the handheld on

NOTE: if you want to really take advantage of this wealth of content, you'll need a larger SD card than the 4GB one the 3DS comes with. The 3DS doesn't have a maximum SD card size, but it requires them to be formatted FAT32, and the built in Windows format tool will refuse to format any disk larger than 32GB with FAT32 even though FAT32 supports up to 2TB. Why? Because Microsoft would rather you use their newer filesystem, exFAT, which has worse compatibility, but more features, and, more importantly, which Microsoft collects royalties on. if you want to use a larger SD card than that, you'll need a separate tool to format them, such as guiformat. I have a 128GB SD card in my 3DS and it works great!

I made this a couple of months ago but. hack your 3ds. do it right now.

[immarkrctso]

Hello everyone! I will be telling you what are the use of Cloud Computing, Software, Internet Browsers, Hardware, Transactions, Communications Technology, Digital data, and Internet access and what are these. For me, All of these are important for us nowadays because it helps us to improve every single day and these software have vital rules in our daily to day routine as it makes our life easier. Cloud computing is a technology that allows users to access computing resources (such as servers, storage, databases, networks, software) over the Internet, usually through a service provider. Instead of owning and maintaining physical infrastructure, users can access these resources by sharing them.

The main uses of cloud services are as follows:

1. Scalability: Easily scale resources up or down on demand, providing business flexibility.

2. Cost Effectiveness: Users pay for the resources they use, reducing the need to make upfront investments in hardware and infrastructure.

3. Accessibility: Access data and applications anywhere there is an internet connection, promoting collaboration and remote work.

4. Reliability: Cloud providers often offer high levels of redundancy and reliability that minimize downtime.

5. Data Storage and Backup: Cloud storage allows users to store and save data, ensuring data durability and availability.

6. Development and Testing: Developers can quickly provision and remove resources for testing and development.

7. Big Data Analytics: Cloud environments provide the computing power and storage needed to process and analyze large amounts of data.

8. Machine Learning and Artificial Intelligence: Cloud services provide the computing power needed to train and deploy machine learning models.

Cloud computing provides an overall flexible and cost-effective approach to managing IT infrastructure and services.

Software refers to a set of instructions that enable a computer to perform certain actions or functions. This includes programs, scripts, and other executable files that control the operation of hardware components. Software is required for various purposes, such as executing applications, managing system processes, and facilitating user interactions with computers and devices. For example, operating systems, word processors, browsers and games. In general, software plays a key role in the functionality and usability of computer systems.

An internet browser, or web browser, is a software application that allows users to access and navigate the World Wide Web. It interprets HTML code, displays web pages, and enables users to interact with online content by clicking links, filling forms, and more. Popular examples include Chrome, Firefox, Safari, and Edge.

Hardware refers to the physical components of a computer or electronic device. It includes tangible items such as the central processing unit (CPU), memory modules, storage devices (like hard drives or SSDs), graphics cards, motherboards, and input/output peripherals (keyboard, mouse, monitor). Hardware is distinct from software, which comprises the programs and applications that run on the hardware.

A transaction is a process or event where goods, services, money, or information is exchanged between two or more parties. In the context of finance, it often refers to the transfer of funds or assets between accounts.

Transactions serve several important purposes in various fields:

Communication technology refers to the various tools, systems and techniques used to send, receive and process information. This includes devices such as smartphones, computers and network infrastructure such as the internet, satellites and wireless communication systems. It plays an important role in facilitating the exchange of information, audio and multimedia across different media and distances.

Digital data refers to information that is represented in a numerical form, typically as binary code (combinations of 0s and 1s). It can represent various types of content such as text, images, audio, and video. Digital data is the foundation of computer systems and electronic devices, enabling storage, processing, and transmission of information in a digital format.

Internet access refers to the ability to connect to the global network of interconnected computers and access the resources and services available on the internet. This connection can be established through various means, including wired technologies such as broadband (DSL, cable) or optical fiber, as well as wireless technologies like Wi-Fi, cellular networks, and satellite connections. Internet access allows users to browse websites, communicate through email and messaging, stream media, and utilize various online services.

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Into The Unknown, Part 7

First

Previous

Sorry the chapter is late my schedule got thrown off by a hurricane

Three days after they arrived in Gotham, they officially ran out of cash.

Honestly, it was a wonder they had even lasted as long as they had. Who knew that rich kids had so much money just laying around? Certainly not her, if she had she probably would have reconsidered rejecting Adrien’s old offers to date to make their fans shut up... because damn.

Now, they sat outside Drake Manor.

Marinette sat, back resting against the gate, playing a game with the baby. In an effort to soothe the kid’s need to fall from high places, she had tossed him a foot in the air and then caught him. Unfortunately, this didn’t seem to help, but it did entertain Damian. He giggled like a madman (mad...baby?) every time she did it and would yell ‘up!’ every time she tried to stop. Her arms were tired. She’d been doing this for what felt like years, and would be doing it for many years to come. Save her.

The only person that could possibly save her was, unfortunately, busy with other things.

Tim was applying for credit cards. He had stuck his computer and phone through the gate to get their wifi so the company wouldn’t be suspicious (Marinette said they probably wouldn’t be but the king of paranoia had insisted) and was now pressed up against it as far as he possibly could, arms poking through the bars to keep working.

“This is only until we have enough money to get on our feet,” Tim said.

She rolled her eyes. “Yes, Tim, I know.”

He nodded a little against the bars that were pressing against his face and allowed the subject to drop -- for now, Marinette knew it was only a matter of time before he said it again.

“At least one of us needs a job at WE, that’s the only way both of us would be able to send the kid to daycare.”

Marinette stopped tossing Damian, considering, only to immediately start up again when the baby screamed “UP!” at her.

“Probably me,” she said, finally. “The you that lives here is a direct competitor, you might get recognized.”

He nodded his agreement.

And then she sighed and set Damian in her lap because her arms were physically unable to lift him anymore. Damian screamed at her but she just wrapped her arms around him tightly and pet his hair until he relaxed.

When he finally shut up, she said: “You know we’re going to have to wait for both of us to get a job.”

He paused in his typing. “What do you mean?”

“Since it’s WE, they probably have pretty thorough background checks. Two adults that seemingly have lived here their entire lives getting a job at pretty much the exact same time is… more than a little suspicious.”

He pulled his head back from the gate and she wondered idly if he was finally done, but then he just knocked his forehead against the bars. There was a resounding clang that neither of them minded, all of this world’s Drakes were currently at work, and he groaned.

“Yeah, that kind of screams ‘we’re using fake identities’, doesn’t it?”

“Kinda, yeah.”

He groaned again, louder this time.

“I can stay at home,” she offered, somewhat reluctantly. “I can cook.”

He sighed and shook his head as much as the gate would allow. “No. You’re probably going to have an easier time getting a job, WE accepts basically everyone. We need money, so I’ll be a stay-at-home dad.”

Oh.

She smiled a little and looked down at Damian, who was currently petting her hair like she had been petting his just a few moments before. She blinked but reciprocated the action. Damian lit up and reached his hands up so he could get more of her hair.

She leaned down a little and nuzzled her nose against Damian’s.

She glanced up and saw Tim checking over what he had done so far, apparently thinking the conversation over.

Marinette hesitated. If she really wanted, she could just let the conversation drop.

She mumbled a quiet: “... thanks, Tim.”

He didn’t look up from his screen, but she could see the pink tinge in his ears. “It’s fine. I don’t even know what I’d do yet. I’ve only ever had one job and I got it because of nepotism.”

She grinned. “From rich kid to even richer CEO to trophy husband.”

“Oh, how the mighty hath fallen.”

She felt a hand tug her hair and looked down to see Damian pouting, so she started running her fingers through his hair. It was getting kind of long, she wondered if she should get it cut. She didn’t want it to get caught on something, the kid could get hurt.

A thought occurred to her. She glanced at Tim out of the corner of her eyes. “You know… you’re taking my name and I’m going to be the one getting money… maybe you should grow out your hair and I’ll cut mine. Y’know, to really get into our roles.”

He huffed a little. “Shut up.”

She laughed. “Fine. But, really, I think you should grow your hair out. It’d be pretty.”

The both of them tensed at the implications of what she had said. She wondered if she could play it off as a joke… or maybe she should apologize? The blush that had tinged his ears was now creeping down his neck. Was he embarrassed or flustered or angry?

Before she could figure out what to do, Tim’s phone rang.

He fumbled for the phone and pressed it to his ear, successfully hiding the rest of his face from her view.

“Hello?... yes, this is Timothy Drake… yes, I just applied for a new card… I figured I would have a backup in case one of my others got stolen, you know how it is… can I have the card information in advance?... great, thank you!”

He hung up and turned to her, smiling widely.

“We have money.”

She didn’t react how he expected, no playful grin or witty remark or even just a smile. Instead, she doubled over with laughter. Damian whined a little in protest as she threatened to squish him.

He frowned confusedly. “What?”

She motioned vaguely to his face, giggles still spilling from her lips. “It’s just… you’ve been leaning against the gate for so long that it’s made little lines in your face.”

He huffed. “It’s not that funny.”

She managed to get her breathing under control again. “It’s a little funny.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Yes, it is.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Yes, it is.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

She opened her mouth to continue the dumb little argument they were having but then Damian yelled: “NO!”

Tim lit up. “HA. He agrees with me.”

She gasped. “Dami, how could you? You’re supposed to be on my side,” she said with an over exaggerated pout.

Damian looked up at her pout for a moment before slowly leaning forward and attempting to wrap his arms around her middle in a hug.

“Oh,” she said softly, carding her fingers through his hair a few times. “Okay, I forgive you.”

“Weak,” Tim teased.

She looked over to send him a glare, but then she saw the fond smile on his face and relaxed.

“I am. Look at him. He’s so cute.”

“Yeah. He is.”

~

Tim leaned back against the bed frame.

Marinette was out at a job interview for WE. He hoped she got it, he didn’t know what they’d do if she didn’t.

But, he didn’t really have much time to think about that. He was on baby duty.

He’d gotten better at dealing with Damian while doing things, it seemed. He had found a position to sit where one knee was pulled to his chest and the other curled close to him, his legs acting as a chair for the kid. One hand held the kid’s bottle as he drank, and the other scrolled through apartment options on his phone.

They’d probably be in an apartment for at least a while. He didn’t know how homeownership was in this new version of Gotham, but in the old one if you were able to afford a house on your own then you were an immediate target for thieves.

So: apartments.

They could probably get away with a one-roomer, at least while Damian was young. It wasn’t like they needed much room for him, anyway, they might even get rid of the crib since it didn’t look like either of them had the willpower to leave the kid in it all night.

Damian slapped the bottle away, apparently done despite only having drank… all of it. Huh, he must have been more out of it than he’d thought.

He turned off his phone and looked down at the baby. Damian looked back up at him, giving that wide-eyed stare babies were so fond of.

Tim cracked, a smile making its way across his face. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of his little brother’s head.

“So, kiddo, what do you want to do?”

Damian babbled at him in an authoritative tone. Tim nodded thoughtfully, as if he understood him and was truly considering the idea of whatever it was he said.

“Interesting idea. I think we should watch TV. Sound good?”

Damian nodded, though Tim really doubted that he had somehow managed to say the exact thing that he had.

He pulled the remote out of the bedside drawer and started flipping through channels, looking for something that was bright and colorful enough for Damian to enjoy it but at least semi-decent so Tim wouldn’t be bored out of his mind.

He came upon Monsters LLC and turned it on. While Tim agreed that, considering the way that Mr. Firenoose acted, the company would totally be an LLC, it just didn’t have the same ring to it as Monsters Inc. So sad. The kids of this world were missing out.

At least Damian seemed to be enjoying it. He gasped and pointed at this world’s version of Sully and yelled “KITTY!”

Before Tim could correct him, though, the knockoff Boo said the same thing.

Great. Well. He supposed the kid was close enough. At least there were no monsters in this world for Damian to mistake for cats. It wouldn’t come back to bite them. Probably.

And, so, that’s how the day went. Tim and Damian sat in bed, Damian leaning back against Tim’s chest and watching his movie, a new bottle of milk half in his mouth. Tim scrolled through apartment options on his phone, picking out a few to check out over the next few days.

After a while, Marinette slipped in. She kicked her shoes off, letting them fly in opposite directions, and then trudged across the room.

She dropped onto the bed face down beside the two boys and Tim frowned.

“I’m guessing that means it didn’t go well?”

“No, I got the job,” she said, her voice muffled. “They said I could start tomorrow if I wanted.”

“... then…?”

She slowly picked her head up. She looked absolutely exhausted. “I’m an intern.”

… yikes.

He hesitantly reached a hand out and patted her head a few times.

She rolled her eyes and pulled a pillow to herself so she could scream into it.

Damian looked away from the movie, eyes wide, and then looked at Tim like he would somehow know how to fix it.

… he probably was supposed to. He was the adult here and, supposedly, married to her.

But Tim was a bat. So, he pulled a classic bat move:

“Want to spar?”

“... kinda,” she admitted. “But what about Damian?”

Damian was currently entranced by a movie about… was that unicorn eating trash?

It didn’t matter. (It totally did. What the fuck was going on in this movie?)

Tim smiled. “I’m sure that Kaalki and Tikki can warn us if something is going to happen. Not that it looks like anything will.”

Marinette hesitated before breaking into a smile. “Okay, let’s do it. I’ve been feeling a little antsy.”

He gently picked up Damian and set him on the bed, telling the kwamis to keep him safe for the maybe ten minutes they would be distracted, and then led Marinette a few feet away so they could let out a little bit of their excess energy.

~~~~~

Next

@nathleigh @peachmuses @unoriginalmess @hammalammadamdam @astrynyx @laurcad123 @927roses-and-stuff

[thesimperiuscurse]

08.04

It’s The Kingston Legacy’s sixth anniversary, so here’s a throwback post to celebrate! Last month I forced myself to reread the entire legacy, and while I stopped, clicked off the tab, and emitted a soundless scream of pure cringe numerous times (I wish I was kidding)—the past generations are actually not as terrible as I remember. I think enough time has passed for me to detach myself from the childish storytelling and look back in nostalgia. 

Thank you to my fellow Wordpress writers who have come along the journey, some for many years now, through every high and low. It’s astounding how much has changed in the legacy from when I was 15, and 21. Follow me down the (very) long memory lane, as I reminiscence about each story and my perspective on them now ❤

Generation 1 — Fern (2015)

To my shock, I found myself genuinely enjoying Fern’s story. I think this was because the first generation was purely me commentating on gameplay, and not trying to write a story (that’s when the cringe began). I was inspired by one of the original stories, Alice and Kev, to make a homeless sim and document her struggle for a better life: Fern, a snobby aspiring writer. Reading this, a huge wave of nostalgia hit me, and it reminded me of how wonderful Sims 3 gameplay is. Although I’m long past it now, there’s real heart and life in the design. I think it speaks about the rich personalities and quirks that I could write a whole life story off it. It was super fun making Fern camp out at Old Pier Beach, stealing from townie picnics and roasting apples on the fire, finding little ways to scrounge money, giving her a makeover in the salon, watching the townie dramas unfold around her. Although she faced homelessness two times and a shitty first husband (yeah, fuck off, Xander), Fern grew into a strong and independent yet sweet and gentle character, in love with the ocean like her great-granddaughter comes to be.  

I never actually addressed this, but she (and her love Christopher) passed away in the story between the end of Gen 3 and start of Gen 4. It just felt weird to make it a big deal because they never died in game—still ‘alive’ and well, scattered across different backup saves and the bin.  

Generation 2 — Briar (2015)

Briar’s story was strange, because it was half gameplay and half story, which meant that there were things that just did not... make... sense. She was quite an ‘unreliable’ character to follow because of her Insane trait. The plot revolved around her as a fresh detective, investigating supernatural phenomena in Sunset Valley. Her character arc was almost the opposite to her mother’s: a naive, optimistic, silly girl hardening through trauma into a cold and ruthless police chief. Ash’s death was the one moment I felt true sadness in this legacy, because he did really die. Imagine me actually getting emotional over my characters, lmao. Wild. 

Also, Max is OP. To this day he is one of the best male characters in my legacy, a healthy and supportive best friend (to husband) in stark contrast to the following generation. 

Fallen Angels — Cherry (2016-2019)

Yes. It’s this generation. Square the fuck up, Cherry. I will fight her any day. Old readers will know of my pure hatred for this story. It’s been about two years since it thankfully ended. My verdict now?

It’s not quite as horrifically shitty, Gabriel and Lilith being a lot nicer than I remembered (Gabriel’s only a bit of a dick at the start), but it still has glaring problems, such as the pacing and clumsy handling of sensitive topics. The story would have been far nicer if it focused less on Cherry and Luc’s relationship and their respective issues, more on the found family and her relationship with Gabriel (which was rushed due to me despising the story by that point). During the first chapters, I was cringing spectacularly at the combination of Luc’s initial jackass behaviour and Cherry’s whining. Toxic as FUCK. I had to skip 3.8 and 3.9 entirely. These two (because of my own shameful mistake) tainted the generation in my eyes, and even though all of the characters grew from their toxicity, I can’t really see past that guilt to the better parts of the story. 

Jade has been telling me for years that this story isn’t all bad, and upon forcing myself to reread, I can see what you mean. I’m sorry LOL. Something that pleasantly surprised me was the writing quality (just the prose, not the actual story mechanics... lmfao), and Raphael, who made me smile every time he appeared. Every single careless, sarcastic line of his was a banger. The pictures are something else I like, too. Many of them stand up to the best ones in En Pointe—the fiery, gritty, industrial tones of Bridgeport just hits different. The world was rich and immersive, which is missing at the moment in En Pointe because of me being too lazy to build a proper Los Angeles world, but Act III is set in Boroughsburg so I’m excited to get back into the city scenes. 17 year old me wasn’t mature enough to tackle dark themes, but at least the visuals for them were nice, I guess. The atmosphere of the story I really enjoy. It’s just the toxic characters and way-too-angsty moments that ruin the whole thing for me. 

En Pointe — Evangeline (2019-)

And here we are now! The early chapters are kinda painful to read because 1) Mako looked so ugly and 2) the dialogue was so clumsy and generic. I sighed in relief when Chapter 5 came around, because it was then both of those aspects really began to improve. Eva’s voice was simple, with her punchy remarks, much less romantic and descriptive than Cherry, so it was interesting to see her voice becoming more complex and layered as I more understood her character. Also, me visibly struggling with the natural lighting and only getting a handle on it 7 chapters later has me shaking my head. 

I’m already beginning to identify issues with the story, mostly with character arcs and pacing. It’s a strange combination of fast pacing (spanning half a year in 8 chapters) and Eva becoming surprisingly comfortable with Mako’s touch due to their unusual pas de deux circumstances. It’s curious how real life time actually played into the pacing of the story—because of the slow publishing schedule, less time has passed in the story as real life, so it’s almost as if the time jumps were made up by real life time, making the jumps feel not too strange. Reading consecutively, however, Evako’s relationship growth doesn’t feel slow burn... a little underdeveloped, in a way, despite their lengthy conversations. I think that’s because of Mako being such a reserved and mysterious character, and that I’ve unconsciously come to rely on Tumblr to give more depth to the characters/relationships. Luckily, pretty much everyone who comments on the story also follows me here, so this dual-platform storytelling is okay, I suppose. I want to post more of #Mishako since there just isn’t enough time to explore their bromance in the story!

At the moment I’m not happy with the story, but it’s fine. I’m learning. There’s more than half the story to go, which means plenty of time to reflect upon the issues and improve. I’m really looking forward to Eva and Mako’s character arcs in Act III. At the moment their relationship is based on their natural chemistry and respect for each other, and since they are yet to face trials their bond isn’t super deep, but Evako are still my favourite couple in the legacy thus far, and feel much more real than any character I’ve written before. It’s been very interesting for my aro ass (and being way more logical than emotional) to figure out a dynamic that is actually compelling to me, because most of the time when I look at romance I’m just like 😐🤨 I’m liking it so far but we shall see how everything unfolds, because I have barely any idea what’s going to happen beyond Act II, lmfao. 

That’s it for my incredibly long throwback! I hope it was at least nice for the OG readers, and interesting for anyone else who managed to battle through this essay, haha. This family has been an integral part of me growing up, as a person and writer and artist (what I’ve developed in visuals I apply to architecture), learning a great deal of awareness about real life through story research, which is pretty cool now that I think about it. I’m aiming to finish En Pointe by the end of 2022. I’m excited for what unexpected changes are to come!

[escapethewonderland]

It could have been you

Pairing: JakexFem!MC (Nadia)

Word counts: 1.8k

A/N: Hi darlings, I got the itch for a bit of Jake angst over the last few days so here it is this little OS. Kindly inspired by a song that stuck in my head while writing, Muddy Waters by LP. Hope you like it! SPOILERS FOR EPISODE 7 ENDING, BE AWARE!

TW: swearing, angst, mention of blood

Nadia was sitting on the edge of her bed, watching her closet intently like she was trying to find an answer to the incredible mess that her life had become over the last month. The doors were hanging open, patiently waiting for the girl to start gathering the clothes she needed for the trip to Duskwood.

She felt like her head was on the verge of exploding. Rabid thoughts were chasing each others around unbounded, hammering against her temples and begging to set them free.

She squeezed her hands together, quivering nervously while trying to release that ugly tension off her body. Seeing Richy bloody, slowing fading away on that hellish forest’s ground was the last straw for Nadia: someone got severely hurt and, all of a sudden, the game her and Jake were playing got extremely real.

Nadia couldn’t afford anymore to wait on the sidelines, protected by the distance and her hacker because sooner or later, they would come knocking on her doors. Although the strong gut feeling of running far away in the opposite direction, Nadia couldn’t deny the inescapable bond that was calling her to Duskwood. Even more now that both the girl and Jake may had the blood of an innocent guy dripping from their hands.

The young woman closed her eyes against that cruel image, breathing slowly from her nose, flexing her fingers.

Richy was going to make it; he had to.

He might survive. Those were the feeble words of hope that the doctors had said and the whole group hold on to them with ferocity: the idea of losing Richy was unacceptable.

A notification from the phone distracted the young woman, making her wince: she couldn’t recall how long she had been standing still in front of the wardrobe.

  Nadia…I just read your texts. Is it true? Is Richy…?

The girl let an unsteady breath slip out between her lips, fighting back the tears.

Yes Jake, he’s fighting for his life on an operating table.

She got up from her bed, walking aimlessly around the small apartment in an agitated frenzy. Jake’s answer came right away.

I’m so, so sorry. I…I wasn’t expecting that. I…I’m at loss for words.

“No shit” Nadia snorted viciously under her breath, wiping away a traitorous tear that slowly crept down her cheek. Her breath was now ragged, but she still tried to keep her cool and not hyperventilate. Panic wouldn’t get her nowhere, she needed to be sharp right now.

Holding her phone in a tight grip, Nadia walked back to her bedroom; mind settled.

I don’t know what to say too, Jake, but I know what I have to do.

She threw the mobile on her bed with more vehemence than what was necessary. With few, swift strides, she found herself back in her room, standing in front of her closet to retrieve an old backpack from the tallest shelf. She scrutinized the clothes with a clinic eyes, opting for something practical, taking only the bare minimum she needed for a week or so.

Nadia didn’t bother to check her phone when Jake’s first reply came. Nor the next one or the other after that.

She was on autopilot, a ghost wandering around and haunting her own house.

Nadia spared a look at her reflection in the mirror while collecting the stuff she needed from the bathroom: her face was strained with harsh lines, eyes wide with messy makeup and even messier hair.

She brought her things to the other room, dumping them merciless inside the backpack and only then looked at her phone.

There were several messages from Jake but it was the last one that caught the girl’s attention.

Are you packing, Nadia? Please, answer me.

The phone slipped from her fingers after reading that words. A hint of paranoia emerged in her chest and she scanned her bedroom with meticulous care, calming down again only when she had checked twice every possible hiding place. No one seemed to be lurking in her room and the curtains were closed shut, a few sun shines peeking through them. She was still safe, it was still her home, no danger lurking in the shadows.

With trembling hands, Nadia retrieved the phone from the carpet.

She frowned, slightly afraid to look at the camera, before a wave of scolding hot anger filled her bones. Mouth set in a straight, harsh line, she started typing to Jake.

Are you fucking spying on me through my phone, Jake?

No answer. The girl felt like boiling with everything she’d been trying to repress since the first time Thomas texted her.

Are you fucking serious, Jake? Are you fucking with me or have you lost your mind along the way? Do you think that you can just go around spying people through their phone whenever it sooths you, whenever it’s convenient for your agenda?

Jake. I fucking trusted you! YOU…

The girl stopped there, unable to type anymore given the trembling that took control of her hands.

Nadia brought the back of her hand against her lips, suppressing a sob that would inevitably destroy the already fragile dam that was barely holding back all of her destructive emotions.

She fought it with all of her might, eventually falling on her knees because even standing felt crushing in that moment.

Nadia felt like she was going crazy, slowly loosing herself in something that was so much bigger than her.

Her phone started vibrating in her hand, signalling an incoming call from an unknown number.

Nadia stood there for a moment, debating if accepting the call or not. Could it be…?

“Hello?” she answered with a shaky voice.

Nadia heard a sight and a male voice greeted her, no distortion this time.

“Please, don’t go” pleaded who she assumed was Jake on the other side of the line.

Nadia let out a wet sob, almost chocking on the longing and sadness that built up in her chest at hearing Jake’s voice for the first time. His voice sounded so warm and comforting like a soothing balm, but it was all ruined by the ill-timing of the call.

“How much have I longed for this moment… you have no idea, Jake, you have no idea. I can’t believe it, it’s actually you” she mumbled under her breath, almost too quiet to be heard.

Another sight greeted her words, but Jake didn’t say anything.

“I would have loved to hear your voice for the first time under different circumstances” she continued, tears rolling freely down her grieving face.

“But the situation is pretty fucked up, Jake. I can’t afford to wait on the side-lines any longer”

“You can’t go, Nadia, please. You can’t really be thinking of going to Duskwood” replied Jake fast, almost eating up the words like he was in a hurry to get them out, to keep her safely where she was.

“But I am going, Jake. It was all my fault: Jessy’s attack, Cleo’s letters and now Richy… if I didn’t get involved, if I stayed out of it, nothing would have happened to them. It’s only fair I stand by their side to help them, actually help them” Nadia said with deep-rooted sadness in her voice, slowly getting up from the carpet. Her knees felt weak but her mind was strong.

There was a loud thud on the other side of the line, like a fist being slammed against a wooden table.

“No, no, no! Nadia, please! Duskwood is even more dangerous than before right now and you could put yourself into bigger troubles!”

She snorted without humour in her voice, now fully standing, sliding a hand through her hair.

“Well Jake, it’s not like you can stop me, can you? Because you’re not here… You’re not fucking here with me. What would you have me rather do, uh? Don’t you think I’m scared!? I’M TERRIFIED BUT WHY DON’T YOU…”

“IT COULD HAVE BEEN YOU, DAMMIT!” Jake almost screamed into her ear, panting like he had just ran a marathon.

Nadia closed her eyes while more tears carved their path through her reddened cheeks, biting hard on her lower lip. Her heart clenched painfully at his words cause only now she realized how much she’d been craving to feel his barriers coming down.

“It could have been you, bleeding out in that nightmarish forest, for fuck’s sake. And only the thought of you being hurt or worse, of losing you…it’s enough to drive me insane” he confessed softly, his silky voice like sweet honey in the Nadia’s ear, a tempting offer of haven.

“But it wasn’t me” she replied hesitantly, not trusting her voice not to break “it still could have been Lilly. It could have been Hannah”

That was a low blow, Nadia knew that but his sisters were the only family he had left and if he couldn’t be on the front line to save them, she would step up to be in his place and protect them.

“I don’t wanna lose you, not you too” Jake whispered, voice heavy with despair, so close to the mic that for a moment she had the faint illusion of having him right by her side.

“And you won’t, Jake, I promise you. You won’t lose any of us, we will see each other at the end of this. We’ll all be together and make up for all the time we spent apart.”

She almost smiled at that idyllic picture taking shape into her mind.

“But I have to go” Nadia simply stated, softly as to not hurt him, even though she was already doing that.

She closed the call before she lost all of the courage she had mustered up, Jake’s no’s haunting her while she turned off her phone. She exhaled deeply, before hitting her wardrobe’s door with her open palm, muffling a scream against her folded t-shirts.

It took Nadia five whole minutes to regain her composure and fight back fat tears of sorrow, but when she finally looked back up, there were flames in her eyes.

She set her body into motion, retrieving an object from the drawer under her desk: the older phone used to be her main phone, but Nadia was sure she was going to need a backup since everyone in Duskwood already had her info. No one knew her new number though, so she hoped it could turn out to be a secret advantage. Only Lilly was aware of it, she was the one to help her out to settle everything and she was the only soul that knew she was coming to Duskwood and they both preferred that way.

She braced herself, backpack on her shoulder and keys in her hands: even though she was filled with much uncertainty, Nadia knew she was on the right path.

[tigerkirby215]

5e Katarina, the Sinister Blade build (League of Legends)

(Artwork by Riot Games. In b4 Tumblr gives me ToS for this picture.)

In my defense I had this build planned since pre-Tasha’s. With Katarina being absolutely nuts in preseason right now along with her just generally being one of League’s most popular champs I’d have to get around to making a build for her eventually.

Look it was either her or Zac. The only other build I really want to do right now is Miss Fortune and truthfully I’m kinda stumped on her. This build isn’t a build it’s a cry for help.

GOALS

Preparation - We’ll need to always be ready for a fight, with a weapon in hand and ways to rush in.

Shunpo - We’ll also need a way to jump on our foes, or jump away.

Death Lotus - When push comes to shove we’ll need to shred through everyone close by spinning and throwing daggers at a rapid pace!

RACE

Katarina is a human but with some special, magical talents. I’m sure by now people know my aversion to Variant Humans and my love of Eberron Dragonmarks so the Mark of Finding is perfect for finding marks and ending them.

With the Mark of Finding you get some Ability Score Improvements but thanks to Tasha’s we can get a +2 to our Intelligence and a +1 to our Dexterity. You also have Darkvision up to 60 feet, and Hunter’s Intuition, letting you add a d4 to Perception and Survival checks. Finally Finder’s Magic giving you some innate spells.

ABILITY SCORES

15; DEXTERITY - You’re an assassin who hops, skips, and jumps around the battlefield.

14; INTELLIGENCE - For whatever reason Katerina does AP damage? I mean she did. Now she builds Kraken Slayer because lol Rito balance.

13; CHARISMA - People don’t only main you because you’re strong.

12; WISDOM - Kata in lore is a bit of a hot-head but Wisdom is attached to many skills that an assassin needs.

10; CONSTITUTION - You’re a squishy midlaner.

8; STRENGTH - We simply don’t need Strength and with your build I doubt you have much. Even if jumping around like that requires a lot of muscles in the legs and chest.

BACKGROUND

So apparently Katerina is part of a Noxian Noble family? Regardless as a Noble you gain proficiency in History but I’d suggest swapping your Persuasion proficiency with Intimidation instead. You also get proficiency with a gaming set and a language of your choice.

Thanks to your noble birth you have a Position of Privilege, meaning that other nobles will welcome you within their circles and common folk will do their best to please you in order to avoid getting a dagger in their throat. You can even secure an audience with a noble if you need to! Perhaps you need to put a knife in their throat? An assassin doesn’t ask questions.

(Artwork by Riot Games)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - ROGUE 1

Starting off as a Rogue for skill proficiencies also because yeah duh. As a Rogue you get proficiency in four skills from the Rogue list: Acrobatics is an obvious choice, Athletics will help your poor Strength score, Perception will help you spot incoming hooded assassins, and Stealth will let you do Rogue things. Rogue things like Sneak Attack if an ally is near an enemy or you have advantage, granting you an extra d6 on the attack roll.

You also get Expertise in two of your skills: both Stealth and Acrobatics make sense for an assassin. Speaking of assassin Thieves’ Cant will let you communicate with them in a way that your enemies can’t understand. And to top it off Finder’s Magic you can cast Hunter’s Mark once per Long Rest. Smite and Ignite to get First Blood.

LEVEL 2 - ROGUE 2

Second level Rogues get Cunning Action to Dash, Disengage, or Hide as a Bonus Action. "Never play fair."

LEVEL 3 - ROGUE 3

Third level Rogues get to choose their Roguish Archetype and there’s two important things about your knives:

They do magic damage (for some reason.)

You throw them a lot.

With that in mind we shall be going for the Soulknife from Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything. As a Soulknife you get Psionic Power for a pool of d6 Psionic Energy die that can be used for a variety of features. Psi-Bolstered Knack will let you boost your ability checks as long as you’re proficient, and Psychic Whispers will let you keep assassination plans to team chat.

Of course what we’re really here for is Psychic Blades, a magic d6 psychic damage knife that you can make when you attack which can be dual-wielded and thrown up to 60 feet. You can also attack again with your Bonus Action if you already stabbed with your main action, but the extra attack will only do a d4 instead of a d6.

Speaking of magic: you also get Locate Object from Finder’s Magic. Perhaps not as useful as Find Person, but thievery isn’t beneath you. Your Sneak Attack also increases to 2d6.

LEVEL 4 - ROGUE 4

4th level Rogues get an Ability Score Improvement: turns out Dexterity is pretty important for a Rogue so increase that by 2.

(Artwork by Jennifer Wuestling. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 5 - WIZARD 1

Time for an AP boost. First level Wizards get Spellcasting because what else did you think they got? You learn three cantrips and six leveled spells when starting out as a Wizard, even if you can only prepare a number of spells equal to your Wizard level plus your Intelligence modifier:

CANTRIPS

Instead of making a dinky d4 knife empower it with Booming Blade for some Thunder damage, and even more damage if the enemy moves.

To twirl around with Voracity Sword Burst will strike everyone near one of your daggers with your knives.

For a long ranged damage tool that inflicts Grievous Wounds Chill Touch will let you make sure your lane opponent doesn’t run away and heal up.

SPELLS

Mage Armor will help you avoid a few more hits.

For a Bouncing Blade (sorta) take Ice Knife to hit your target and anyone close to them.

For a shield thanks to Gunblade (like it’s TFT) take False Life to bolster yourself somewhat.

Disguise Self will be helpful for any infiltration missions.

Detect Magic likewise is useful to locate any magical traps.

Every good Rogue has a backup plan: Feather Fall is always useful in a pinch.

You also get Arcane Recovery, allowing you to recover spell slots with a combined total level of half your Wizard level.

LEVEL 6 - WIZARD 2

Second level Wizards get to choose their Arcane Tradition. There is actually a school for magic knives and that school is the art of Bladesinging! As a Bladesinger you get Training in War and Song for proficiency in Performance along with a one-handed melee weapon of your choice: for whatever reason Rogues don’t get proficiency in Scimitars so grab that I guess?

But much more importantly you can invoke a Bladesong as a Bonus Action, which lasts for 1 minute but ends early if you are incapacitated. (Or if you don medium or heavy armor or a shield, or if you use two hands to make an attack with a weapon. I guess.) You can also dismiss the Bladesong at any time with no action required.

While your Bladesong is active you gain a bonus to your AC equal to your Intelligence modifier, your walking speed increases by 10 feet, you have advantage on Acrobatics checks, and you gain a bonus to Concentration checks equal to your Intelligence modifier. You can activate Bladesong a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus, and you regain all expended uses of it when you finish a long rest.

You can also learn more spells like Color Spray for a getaway option, or Cause Fear of incoming ganks.

LEVEL 7 - WIZARD 3

Third level Wizards can learn second level spells like Mirror Image to be everywhere at once, and Misty Step for legally not Flash.

LEVEL 8 - WIZARD 4

4th level Wizards get an Ability Score Improvement: more Dexterity means more AC and deadlier stabs with your knife.

You can also learn more spells like Invisibility for some Duskblade resets, and Enhance Ability (ty Tasha’s) to make sure you’re the best around. And you can learn another cantrip like Prestidigitation for some generic utility sorcery.

LEVEL 9 - WIZARD 5

5th level Wizards can learn third level spells like Haste to up your APM, and Spirit Shroud to make all your stabs all the deadlier.

LEVEL 10 - WIZARD 6

At 6th level you get an Extra Attack as a Bladesinger, but unlike most Extra Attacks you can also cast a cantrip along with attacking! The interesting thing about this is that (rules as written) you can attack twice after casting Booming Blade with this! And depending on your DM you might even still have your Cunning Action!

And on the subject of spells you can learn two more such as Clairvoyance for some Farsight Alterations, and Nondetection to... not be detected...

(Artwork by Atey Ghailan. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 11 - ROGUE 5

5th level Rogues get Uncanny Dodge. When you’re hit with an attack you can use your reaction to halve the damage. Additionally your Psionic Energy die increases to a d8, and your Sneak Attack increases to 3d6.

LEVEL 12 - ROGUE 6

6th level Rogues get Expertise in two more skills: Perception will help you avoid ganks and Intimidation will help you extract information.

LEVEL 13 - ROGUE 7

7th level Rogues get Evasion. If you’re forced to make a Dexterity save you can make some pro plays to dodge, taking no damage on a successful save and half damage on a failed save.

Your Sneak Attack also increases to 4d6, so you can jump onto them after dodging their skill shot.

LEVEL 14 - ROGUE 8

8th level Rogues get another Ability Score Improvement: since your Dexterity is maxed let’s invest in that Intelligence... sorta. The Observant feat will let you increase your Intelligence by 1 along with granting a +5 bonus to passive Perception and Investigation so you can watch those wards, and the ability to read lips! Definitely helpful for an assassin.

(Artwork by Katie “TeaTime” De Sousa. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 15 - ROGUE 9

Hey how about we get your actual abilities at total level 15? Finally with level 9 in Soul KInife you get Soul Blades for two new abilities that use your Psionic Energy die. Homing Strikes will let you add your Psionic Energy die to an attack roll if you miss, and Psychic Teleportation will let you throw out a knife and teleport to it!

Something something read how the ability works yourself because these are guides on how to make a character and I won’t tell you what every class in Tasha’s does. Oh your Sneak Attack also increases to 5d6 now.

LEVEL 16 - WIZARD 7

7th level Wizards get 4th level spells like Phantasmal Killer to make your own jungler (one who’ll actually gank!), and Dimension Door to Teleport into lane. Or out!

LEVEL 17 - WIZARD 8

Level 8? How about an ASI? You may notice that we have two uneven ability scores: increase both your Intelligence and Charisma by 1.

You can also learn more spells but there honestly isn’t much I want from fourth level so hop back to level 3 for Sending. But you can also take Greater Invisibility for some Duskblade resets. Look I just really need a 5th level spell but it’s hard to justify magic on a champion who throws knives and nothing else.

LEVEL 18 - WIZARD 9

Time to finally get the last ability we’re missing: Death Lotus. Or more precisely Steel Wind Strike to hit everyone with your daggers and then maybe Shunpo to them after the fact. Speaking of Shunpo for seemingly unlimited jumps take Far Step, allowing you to be everywhere at once. Just know that you’ll only have one 5th level slot.

(Artwork by Esben Lash Rasmussen. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 19 - ROGUE 10

Picking up our last two levels in Rogue: level 10 means another ASI. Capped off Intelligence woo!

LEVEL 20 - ROGUE 11

11th level Rogues get Reliable Talent, meaning that you can’t roll below a 10 on any skill you’re proficient in. As a capstone skill let’s check what the minimum roll you can get on your skills is:

27 on Acrobatics and Stealth

24 on Intimidation

23 on Perception

21 on History

18 on Performance (Bladesinger lul)

15 on Athletics

And to top it off your Psionic Energy die increases to a d10, along with your Sneak Attack capping off at 6d6!

FINAL BUILD

PROS

They fear my weapons? I am the weapon - Regardless of your choice of tools you are extremely deadly. On one hand 6d6 sneak attack daggers you can apply 3d8 Booming Blade damage to, and on the other hand plenty of potent spells like Haste and Spirit Shroud.

If you run, you won't see me stab you! - You are also incredibly mobile with Misty Step, Far Step, Psychic Teleportation, Bladesong, and just general Cunning Actions. Not to mention that Bladesong gives a big boost to AC which combines well with Uncanny Dodge and Evasion.

A victory is sweetest when it leads to another - Rogues are meant to be skilled professionals and you are certainly that. The skills you are proficient in can be boosted by psionics. Oh and 28 Passive Perception thanks to Observant is just a little bit nutty.

CONS

Ready for trouble? - While you have many a skill you have many more that are lacking. You can put on a mean face sure, but for an important check like Arcana your psionic potential won’t save you.

Better dead than dull - Your spell slots are limited, and quite notably you only have one 5th level slot for Death Lotus IE Steel Wind Strike. While magic can supplement you nicely remember to ration yourself appropriately.

Come on, live a little... while you can! - You know what class doesn’t have a lot of health? Wizards, and half your levels are in Wizard. With a 10 in CON and most of your hit die being d6s your enemies won’t even need to hit you to Power Word Kill you.

But as an assassin you prove why your house is the best in the business. Talk is cheap and you’re always prepared: go in with knives at the ready, take out your target and anyone in their way before slipping out unscathed. You can always reset after a rest; just be sure to remember your cooldowns.

(Artwork by West Studios. Made for Riot Games.)

[hansungiee]

Whos ready for some rambles

I’m so proud of My dumb ass stars.

They’ve overcame a lot of shit this season. I mean no one even thought we would be here like They started the season 1-7, our coach got fired, they couldn’t (can’t) score to save their lives, starting goalie got hurt so we’ve been depending on our backup who never played a full starter position playoff game let alone a Stanley cup final game, we have used every single baby in the Ahl. But the demons found a way to make it to the playoffs and make it to the Stanley cup finals which they haven’t done in 20 years. They were the underdogs in every single series they were in and they found a way to fight thru and make it. So I am so proud of them I’m proud of how far they’ve come with so much shit they had to deal with. Next year the stars will get better and come back even harder. I’m so sad it ended this way and I’m so heartbroken tbh lmao but I know we’ll be better and I can’t wait to see where the stars go from here. I love my boys and I can’t wait to see them again

[cat-26]

I'm doing this again: messy thoguhts while I watch MCC 10 from Techno's POV

Overall thoughts:

- I want to rewatch that Sky Battle, it was SO GOOD

- I need to watch Pete’s POV, maybe a few pieces of Wilbur’s

- The team was so good together, Eret is probably Techno’s biggest fan, Techno is so nice to Niki <3

Pregame: Techno thinks they are destined for 4th place. Eret thinks they can win. Techno doesn't want to put on matching skins because "once you do, your lose is guaranteed" (but he is being peer pressured) Techno: Niki, have you seen footage of Ace Race? Niki: Which one is that one? Techno: It's the one where you race They all have crowns! (Except Philza but he is a king nontheless) Techno is starting his stream now "Your score goes down at least 15% when you're wearing matching skins because the universe knows you're having too much fun so it wants to put you in your place" 1 - Bingo Techno's team doing good in Bingo makes sense: PHILZA MINECRAFT IS THERE Techno did great in bingo but they split the points so he is 17th hahahahahaha poor techno, he even memorized recipes and everything 2 - Parkour Techno actually trained for parkour this time! PeteZahHut is back!! Red is first, of course I like the changes, it's a lot of changes this time Wow Techno POPPED OFF after passing yellow section he was stuck on, like he completed all the following sections first try DREAM COMPLETED IT AGAIN AND PETE WAS ALMOST THERE 3 - TGTTOSAWAF I love writing the name of this game hahaha New map!

Niki to her turtles: "Can you please just calm down, your friend is dying!" Techno: "No I will not calm down!" The rocket spleef map is WEIRD

Trident map, poor Niki Krinios is doing amazing! His team has a great chance of winning Techno is also doing great Nooo Eret made it but didn't have time to wack a fan

Hate this punching map Haha Techno killed Tommy and Will killed Philza hahaha SBI killing spree The Antarctic Empire trained Techno for the ice boat map (Philza used his elytra too much, that's why he couldn't complete it) Techno is too good at placing blocks while falling!! Also he got saved by someone punching him hahah TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES 1st place!!! Top 4 players this game: Dream Techno Quig Sapnap yep I can see why

Techno math to see why Dream is ahead of him haha TECHNOMATH

4 - Sky Battle Uno Reverse is Confusing "Who here can bridge without falling" (No answer, they are all thinking the same: YOU, Techno, you can bridge) Round 1 The simmers are being killed by Aqua :( oh and lime TapL v Techno in sky battle yeaaah Ooh Techno is too good!! TNT plays!! Round 2 Techno aaking where Philza is for backup, he did the same with Calvin last time Dream got Philza and Eret Techno is TOO GOOD THE PEARL CLUTCH???? Round 3 Niki falling every round :( Them going to the simmers immediately, poor simmers they are getting bullied THE PLAYS HE KILLED THE GREEN TEAM WITH CREEPERS WHAT A GENIUS BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD I WANT TO REWATCH THIS ROUND 100 TIMES THIS WAS AMAZING "2nd Place WHERE ARE YOUR PARKOUR POINTS NOW, DRE?" - Audience takeover Techno is losing this one, but battle box also works for them "Skywars.. sorry sky Battle... sky skirmishes" that is such a better name, Noxcrew change it to that "yall practice parkour don't act like you enjoy fun" - sick burn Techno I don't really enjoy dream hating on techno all the time... we're past it dream, please stop. I 100% support Techno ranting about that "I like Dre, I want to subscribe to Dre's youtube channel" (Dream’s name is cut off in the tab) 5 - Battle Box The power ups are veggies hahahah I saw it on the update video "There is a potato, I'm gonna farm!" No power ups... (the veggies don't work) Viewer team 1 DESTROYED Philza with the 3 kills against the undefeated team Cyan! Go Philza Minecraft! Now Dre. Dream really wanted Techno dead, I'm pretty sure it cost him the game. This team is TOO STRONG, THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP you can’t compete with that Dre!!! Aqua team DESTROYED, PEPE CAPE Techno got Pete when he was at 1 heart against 6??? Techno is invinscible after the duel!! "Who needs health when you don't get hit?" Techno killed by the viewer?? Invisible viewers?? Weird round against the viewers

Rushed by the simmers hahahahahahahahaha ---- 3/4 yellow team on top 10?? The mega chicken left from rocket spleef??? Philza is CURSED "I just want rocket spleef" :( poor Phil 6 - Ace Race Techno briefing Niki!

Everyone watched Pete's vod hahaha

The top 4 in lap 2 is sooo close together (pete, techno, quig and dream) Techno hit Pete in the air on the trident part??? So weird But he still got 2nd so GO TECHNO (and GO PETE!!!) All of them encouraging Niki <3 <3 NIKI SUPPORT <3 <3 NIKI SUPPORT <3 Techno fastest lap!! Techno is actually comforting Niki <3 I love this team 7 - Sands of Time Eret sand duty? Why not niki? Great communication so far 2 keys!! Techno is daring the lava parkour? Oh no he died in the lava with THE RED KEY This is going terrible Okay it is a little better Honestly 5th after that weird start is not that bad Uuh Techno wants to gamble with HITW, Phil says SG 8 - Big Sales at Buildmart About his list strat:

"There are two types of victory: You can beat the players or your can bear the makers of the game. On that day, we did both" Techno knows wood names now?? Who is this person? Bad organizarion at first but now they are oganizing yes Niki is lost Oh they are actually communicating this is better They are kinda slow though, and not oragnized enough. Bug with magenta blog nooo Techno is really terrible at this game -end of games- Top 4: Quig Techno Dream Pete Look at Techno having good sportmanship, being nice to Dream, Quig, George....  Green and Orange to Dodgebolt! Can Pete win this one? Green seems stronger but in dodgebolt "anything can happen" “green should have it” Green? Dream? Grian? -- they are all deaf!!! - Dodgebolt Round 1 False got Quig! He stood still (Leaf blower man is there, he apparently comes on on Saturdays) Orange 1-0 Round 2 Pete is down, Quig is not getting arrows Gets the arrow, hits it Cubfan 1v4, not happening 1-1 Round 3 Techno chearing for Scott to get Pete-Quig-Dream team haha Pete and Quig out, interesting! Orange has 2 arrows Beans and false!! Orange 2-1 "Smallishbeans, he 1v3d my team once"

Round 4 Quig out! "Orange's tactics are better" - yep, Techno is right. Green is not giving arrows to Quig, and Orange is targeting Quig False got 3??? 2v1 for the wiiin??? Shubble got one FALSE ACE FOR THE WIN ORANGE WINS!!!! PETE JOINS HBOMB IN 3 TIME WINNERS AND FALSE IS THE FIRST BACK TO BACK WINNER!!!!!!! The simmers are not last!!!!!!! #notlast #havefun -post game talk- Techno: Once again I strognly regret talking to Tomminnit Pokimane: Relatable -- Tommy: I am never awkward Techno: Tommy I watched your 1mil video

-end- They're all playing HIPIXEL YESSS

[ageless-aislynn]

That's actually what I was doing, I thought I could work on the draft on my tablet when the PC just Wasn't Having Any Of It, then edit on the PC when it was. Annnnd discovered that the drafts don't sync, anything I change on one, isn't reflected in the other. So I emailed the draft to myself and, yikes, did the spacing indeed break badly. It took about 10 minutes of manually deleting 6 or 7 returns between every sentence in the same paragraph, sometimes between words. It was such a chore, I don't want to have to keep doing that. It will work as a method to save/backup my work but is definitely not a solution to use to write/edit in by sending it back and forth like I'd originally hoped. :(

I honestly could not have ever guessed any of this could happen. I thought a new PC would work but if not, it could be fixed or replaced. I thought a fix would FIX it, not break more things (I could use Google docs et al before the BIOS and driver updates).

Other people don't seem to have this issue... except for the dozen or so I see having it on Dell's forums. I still think Windows 11 is at the heart of all these incompatibilities. Not for everybody, of course, but if you're "lucky" enough to have the magic combination of BIOS and graphics card/chips, then enjoy this unsolvable mess.

Interestingly, did you know that, despite Win11 being barely 2 years old, Win12 is set for release this June? This feels a little like Win8 to me: some people used it fine but it was a disaster to others, so much so that they distanced themselves from it by the next version being Win10, not 9. I could be totally wrong, of course. Wouldn't be the first time, won't be the last, lol.

Also, Dell isn't selling my particularly configured PC anymore. Just interesting tidbits of info, that's all of course. Dell will continue to stand by their assertion that nothing is wrong with it. Even if they replace every piece of hardware in it and the problems persist. Even if they straight up replace the PC with a new one that does the same things. Nope, nothing wrong here, we totally have no liability here from selling a broken, difficult to repair, very unstable even when "repaired" machine. I trusted Dell for a lot of years but I don't anymore. Sad thing? I've found this same issue spread over Lenovo, Asus, and Acer. I found an article released by Microsoft about a Win11 incompatibility issue last year that covered graphics cards of "all, makes, models and manufacturers."

I don't know where to go after this. This PC is mine, instability and all, until it dies (or I do ;) ) but what can I get to replace it? Even building my own could run into that "all makes" etc issue, couldn't it? I just want a PC I trust, again. That I can play my Steam games on again. Can write on and make GIFs and vids and that will just work. Just... work. That won't make me feel like any "stability" is temporary and that there's no actual solution ever, even if I get a new one. My old PC broke in Oct 23, it can't launch any EA games like Mass Effect. It can't capture, the Game bar broke and even a Windows reinstall didn't bring it back. I can't use Vegas anymore, so no vidding or GIFmaking, and that STILL puts it ahead of this brand-new PC because I could still play the MCC and could still use Word to write in. That makes me so sad.

Apologies for the long ramble, I know I've said a lot of this before. It just never goes away. I never can do anything on the PC that's not researching repairs or trying them out. Or trying to very carefully do something "difficult" like open my email and literally cringing and holding my breath if the Nvidia card kicks on. My computer has always been my escape from RL stress and now it's become another huge source of stress and I have nowhere to go and no hope that this will get better.

Okay, apparently my Fire tablet and PC are not syncing together, which resulted in me making a high-pitched pterodactyl noise a little while ago when I thought EVERYTHING I HAD WRITTEN IN MY EMAIL DRAFT YESTERDAY HAD DISAPPEARED.

Thankfully, it's still there on my tablet so I emailed it to myself and now I can see it on the PC but DANG is this a clunky, slow and painful way to try to do this. I have a SYSTEM when it comes to writing, frens. Anything messing with MY SYSTEM makes me feel a bit

and even more

Do I dare try installing Word 2003 (my beloved) again? Is it worth it to potentially go back to Blue Screen of Death City, population MEEEEEE or is there something else I'm missing?

Can't use Google docs as my computer already proved. I don't want anything I have to install on the computer *points to fears of returning to BSoD City* but I want something that I can somehow save at the same time. I dunno. I was hoping to get this in really good shape today and instead I'm stuck where I left off and feeling like I'm trying to excavate a hole the size of Mt. Everest with a teaspoon.

I thought about writing in a Tumblr draft or in AO3 itself but either of those has their own perils (Tumblr in accidentally POSTING IT and AO3 warns not to keep your only copy there). Maybe writing in AO3 and email it back to myself when I'm done for the day/writing session?

I just want to be able to use my computer like a COMPUTER again and not have to be so cautious and careful with everything. This is honestly stupid stressful. UGH.

*more angry moth noises, just 'cause*

Update: I'm going to try writing in AO3 for now and saving as a draft/emailing that back to myself. It's better than nothing and feels a little more familiar since I usually do my final editing in AO3 since I can often catch errors in AO3's preview that I missed in Word for some reason.

Still, if you have any recommendations for apps/sites/programs etc you like to write in, I'd like to hear them.

[hellowkatey]

Febuwhump Day 7

Prompt: Poisoning

Read on AO3

A Toast to Diplomatic Dangers

It's difficult to enjoy a nice dinner when everyone at the table is hell-bent on killing you. Anakin isn't entirely sure how or why he and Obi-Wan are sitting here so casually when they figured out not ten minutes ago the dinner party they crashed was of Separatist synthesizers-- murderous ones, at that.

Obi-Wan tried to justify it by saying, "It's social propriety. They think we think they are still part of the Republic, and we just won't let them know otherwise."

It took a moment for Anakin to think through exactly what his former master had even said. "But what is the purpose?"

And then he got that look-- the mischievous eyes and trademark Kenobi wry smile that only ever means he has a plan Anakin won't like. Obi-Wan gives him so much trouble for his plans being reckless, but if only the old man would look in the mirror every once in a while. Sure, his plans can be physically demanding, sometimes dangerous, but Obi-Wan's... they rely on the smallest securities that often the Jedi Master has deduced on his own but hasn't yet shared with everyone else. He once heard Master Windu joke that they are the two extremes on the spectrum of chaos, and he is pretty sure that is the best way to describe it.

"Information, of course."

Fantastic. Risking our lives to satisfy Master Kenobi's curiosity.

Anakin wanted to remind him that 1. they are not shadows and not trained to spy and 2. he has a bad feeling about all of this, but they were escorted into the dinner party before he could make his points. So now they sit there, and it is painfully obvious nobody at the table is pleased with their presence. It's almost embarrassing for the senators how poorly they are containing their disdain for their Jedi guests-- how they got this far without being outed as Confederacy converts is laughable.

But his master persists-- chatting them up as though he is completely oblivious to their curt answers and blank stares. Anakin just sips on his

"... but I do think that last bill regulating hyperspace lanes was quite necessary, at least in the long run. Wouldn't you agree, Senator Zurros?"

"If we expect to be in this war for the next decade, maybe Master Jedi."

Obi-Wan folds his hands in front of him. "Apologies, I saw your name on the supporting document, so I assumed we shared sentiments."

The Falleen senator pauses, receiving looks from the others at the table. "Yes, well, I can have opinions differing... from what still... makes sense, you see."

"Of course, well you are much more acquainted with political processes and the practice of choosing loyalties than I," Obi-Wan says, looking as innocent as possible. Silence falls over the others, and the Jedi Master takes a sip of wine.

Anakin has to hold in a laugh. Obi-Wan is enjoying this far too much.

Serving droids enter the room with plates of the main course, thankfully breaking up the tension in the room. Anakin spies two of the senators on the far end whispering to one another, looking up at Obi-Wan and then to one of the droids. Anakin grimaces. It looks like he will be saving his master again, after all.

"Excuse me a moment," he says, standing up and bowing politely. He feels the stares as he walks off toward the hall, but ignores them.

Fresher? Obi-Wan inquires through their old training bond.

Following a lead. Don't eat.

Oh good. Anakin smiles and rolls his eyes. Even through the Force, where there is no tone, he can still feel the sarcasm. It's admittedly been a while since he's seen this side of his former master. Ever since the war, he's been a lot more serious. A lot more stringent. General Kenobi is a different man than the Master Kenobi Anakin grew up with. It's by necessity, he supposes. Obi-Wan isn't just another Jedi knight anymore. He is a council member, a high general. Sometimes Anakin envies the responsibility and trust the Order instills in him so naturally, but most of the time he is relieved to have eyes off him for once. But right now, General Kenobi isn't here. Master Kenobi is and it's nice to see. A little nostalgic in ways.

He gets out to the hall, but instead of going to the 'fresher, he turns the other way toward the kitchen. He has a feeling if he finds that droid he will also find some sort of command to poison their food or something. It would be enough evidence to arrest them for an attempted assassination, or at least expose them for being traitors. Anakin grimaces at the thought. He doesn't understand the games they play. Join the Confederacy or stay with the Republic, the war will decide who is more powerful. But playing both sides? He doesn't see the honor in being a womp rat.

Anakin knew the hallway was long, but he feels like he's been walking forever at this point. Or maybe the gravity wells have suddenly faltered, and he's walking uphill now.

But that wouldn't make sense. He would hear the crashing of dishes and the paintings on the wall would be tilted. He still has part of his attention on the dinner party and all is calm so far. Anakin wipes a bead of sweat away from his temple, realizing that his hair is clinging to the sheen of sweat across his forehead.

He stops. Blinks. The hallway is tilting, but he has a feeling it isn't a gravity problem. Uh oh, he thinks, and as his knees buckle he sends out a plea of help through their training bond.

__________

Obi-Wan is in the middle of subtly implying that one of the senators attended a particular political rally in the previous cycle when he is suddenly flooded with overwhelming feelings of queasiness, fatigue, and dizziness. He nearly drops his glass at the onset, and he immediately turns to his training bond with Anakin.

Obi-W...

Silence.

He's on his feet in an instant. The rest of the dinner party is staring at him, some with the first smiles he's seen all night, which is not at all comforting to him.

"What is it, Master Jedi?" Zurros says with a look that is far too satisfied to not be involved somehow. He bites back the urge to say a number of damning things about the scheming senator.

"I also will be right back," he says politely before eyeing the Falleen senator severely. Zurros's smile fades in an instant. "You can count on that."

Obi-Wan turns and walks quickly out of the dinner party room. He can feel the muted side of Anakin's bond, and he sends feelings of reassurance through it, though he knows his former padawan may not be able to feel them.

It doesn't take him long to find the young knight collapsed on the ground. Anakin only made it halfway down the hallway. Obi-Wan runs now, falling at his side and rolling him onto his back. Anakin's face is pale and clammy, his breathing concerningly shallow. Obi-Wan swallows hard, picking up his comm and sending the code for an immediate medevac and backup. He turns his attention back to his padawan.

"Anakin, wake up." he urges, trying to wake him. He reaches through the Force and plucks at his consciousness, assessing the extent of the damage. From what he can tell, it's a slower acting poison. It's possible even he has also ingested some and has yet to feel the effects. He picks up Anakin's hand and presses hard against his nail bed. He doesn't react. Possibly a paralytic agent as well...

He can already hear the pounding of trooper footsteps in the distance. Luckily they called for standby back up as soon as they learned of their villainous company. As some troopers with a stretcher come round the corner, Obi-Wan stands.

"General Skywalker has been poisoned by an unknown agent and needs immediate extraction and medical attention," He looks at the group of men led by Cody. "The rest of you are with me." Obi-Wan turns and Cody falls into step beside him.

"The situation, sir?"

"An assassination attempt has been made on a Skywalker. We have cause to hold the senators and their staff present and conduct an investigation into the perpetrator. Blasters to stun, unless deadly action is initiated."

"Yes, General," Cody pauses and then looks up at him. "Have you also been poisoned, sir, or only General Skywalker."

He smiles. Smart man, that Cody. He's picked up Obi-Wan's antics quickly. "If I have I haven't begun to feel the symptoms," he says, giving his commander a side-eye. "But after seeing Anakin's state, I will not be taking my chances on that."

He just doesn't like the medbay. It doesn't mean he has a deathwish, as much as some would like to believe.

They burst into the dinner party room, the senators jumping up in surprise at the Republic troopers that flood into the room with their blasters trained. Obi-Wan smiles, interlocking his hands behind his back.

"I hate to put a damper on our lovely dinner but it seems someone has soiled the wine," he announces, taking a little bit of enjoyment in the outrage on their faces.

"We are senators of the Republic, you can't do this!" Zurros yells as he is placed in cuffs.

"You are suspects of an attempted assassination now. I am implored to remind you of your right to silence, Senator Zurros. For all our sake."

More calls of protest, but Obi-Wan turns to leave the room. Cold sweat has begun to form on his brow, and he is quite determined to not give the medics the satisfaction of carrying him out on a stretcher.

__________

Anakin has a horrible headache when he wakes up. The medbay lighting is never kind, forcing him to slowly blink his way to adjusting to the light.

"He lives," a gentle voice rings out. Anakin rolls to his side, seeing the blurry form of his master sitting on the bed next to him.

"Barely," Anakin groans. "What happened?"

"Poison in your wine. A nasty, but fairly common type, luckily. Kix had an antidote on hand. Those senators weren't exactly criminal masterminds it turns out."

"I could've told you that."

Obi-Wan chuckles. "I'm sure you have many, "I told you so's," for me right now."

Anakin can hear the regret and guilt in his master's voice. It hadn't even occurred to Anakin that any of this would be Obi-Wan's fault, though he hadn't exactly been conscious to contemplate such an idea.

"Someone had to drop otherwise we wouldn't have had evidence to actually arrest them," he pauses. "We did arrest them, right?"

"They are in custody. Two have already confessed to knowing about the scheme."

"They requested immunity, then?"

"Oh of course they did. They're politicians, Anakin," his Master's dislike of politicians is always amusing to Anakin. He wonders what he'll think of Anakin marrying one when he eventually tells him. There will probably be jokes. Lots of jokes. "I still am sorry it had to be you, though."

"Are you kidding? If it was you who collapsed in the hallway I'm sure I would not have the same General Kenobi decorum with those kriffing senators."

Obi-Wan hums with amusement. "I suspect there would be a lot of waving around of your lightsaber."

"We've been over this, it's called aggressive negotiations, and it works."

"Amazing how they don't call you the Negotiator."

Anakin can feel the tension airing out between them as Obi-Wan's guilt fades away. It wouldn't be a mission of theirs if one of them didn't end up in the medbay, anyway... though from the IV in Obi-Wan's own arm, Anakin has a suspicion that he wasn't the only one to get a taste of poison. He decides not to point it out and ruin the mellow mood.

He'll bring it up another time, for sure. Ammo for later.

[kinetic-elaboration]

June 25: 2x24 The Ultimate Computer

Belated notes on my watch of The Ultimate Computer yesterday.

Kirk’s definitely in Captain Mode today. You can tell when he’s on edge and suspicious and serious.

Yet another old Kirk friend. Does he know everyone in Starfleet?

War games lol. But it’s “not the military.”

Spock is super into this computer.

A-7 Computer Expert Certification.

The crew’s not needed? Wow, okay, this is going to end badly.

“This gadget.” How do you really feel, Kirk?

And there’s Spock literally making faces behind the Commodore’s back. He is soooo that type. He’s like “Jim, are you hearing this? Can you believe this guy?”

I’m insulted on Kirk’s behalf right now. Replacing people with machines so blithely is offensive.

Of course Bones doesn’t like it.

Oh yeah triumvirate walking scene. I love them. it takes so little for me to think ‘what badasses.’ S2 is really stepping up this dynamic in particular.

And Spock is comfortable enough around Bones to be sassy around him

Oh no, the computer is already glitching, and there is no backup and no plan B.... Bones is completely right in his assessment. This is essentially a Titanic situation: way too much hubris involved. Nothing can go wrong so nothing will go wrong so we’ve planned for nothing going wrong!

McCoy has BFF Clearance. He can go wherever he wants.

“It’s the M-5? What happened to Ms 1-4?” Channel #5.

Ahhhh little gratuitous touch to Spock’s arm. They’re In Love.

“There are certain things men must do to remain men.”

“The right computer finally came along.” Damn Bones.

Jim’s suspicions about the computer coming right after that line make it look like he’s jealous that Spock likes it so much.

He’s getting a “red alert right here.” Computers don’t have that kind of intuition.

Jim’s so thoughtful and self-aware. He really cares both about his instincts and about interrogating those instincts for bias and unreasonableness. This is giving me real S1 vibes: the quiet, intelligent, idealized hero Captain at the fore.

This whole scene is perfect, eminently quotable, and sounds exactly like something that could have been written about automation in 2021. You’re okay with it when it’s happening to someone else but then the computer comes for YOUR job....

Uh-h, M-5 is turning off all the lights...

Space merchant marines... good to know.

HOW are the Captain and CMO “non-essential personnel”? The first sign that M-5 is illogical. They should bring some doctor on the landing party mission given that uh humans are going on it and might get injured.

Anyway I can’t wait for Kirk to destroy this bitch and save the day.

Lol it turned off the lights on Bones in sickbay.

Damn, now it’s trying to take Uhura’s job too!

Chekov is so bored.

Spock wants to serve under one man and one man ONLY. Loyalty to one man... sounds like a wedding vow... and Kirk looks so soft...

So, if Spock has to describe to McCoy what that (unnecessary bitchy and catty) “Captain Dunsel” remark means, by saying that it’s a phrase that “midshipmen use at Starfleet Academy,” is this to imply Bones didn’t go to Starfleet Academy?

He’s never felt so at odds with the ship.... a lover’s quarrel...she’s cheating on him with another man...

Jim Kirk, certified Poetry Nerd. He’s such a romantic.

So glad Bones got him a drink so he can return to the bridge and a possible emergency with just a little bit of a buzz going.

Spock in the chair...

Huh, an automated ship with no crew. Interesting concept.

Oh no M-5! She’s got control of the ship and she won’t let go!

Kirk’s face when Enterprise attacks.. the betrayal... his beautiful lady used for mindless destruction.

“Only a robot” ship--! Bones is insulted.

Kirk orders the computer turned off but we’re only halfway through the ep so...

....And the computer is sentient now.

That was the shortest Captain’s Log ever. “The computer has taken over the ship the end.”

Scotty’s like, “...Well what if we just unplug it?”

Okay so now they only have 19 crew.

Spock and Bones are on point today. “Don’t say it’s fascinating.” / “I won’t. But it is... interesting.” This bitch knows exactly what he’s doing.

The computer isn’t a child, guys!

We need powerful computers “so men don’t have to die in space”--like uh that man your computer literally just killed?

I don’t get Daystrom’s logic at all. He talks as if people, like, needed to do work in space, to survive or something. We don’t need to. We want to! We want to go out and meet cool aliens! This guy is no fun.

What is the thing “greater” than fact finding in space that the robots are going to free us to do? Like what is more impressive than SPACE? I don’t even get that.

Time to mix up fake sci fi world-building references with real references! The Nobel and Zee-Magnee Prizes. Sitar of Vulcan.

A theory emerges... the computer acts illogically...Daystrom won’t let Spock near it... I know this isn’t where this is going, but it kind of sounds like they’re implying it’s a scam, lol. He sold an idea he didn’t have so it’s like.. not a real computer.

Spock’s little protege, Chekov.

“We have been pursuing a wild goose.” Aw, bb’s trying so hard to be colloquial. (Also he 100% learned that phrase from McCoy in The Gamesters of Triskellion and now he’s trying it out on Kirk...when McCoy isn’t around.)

“Not to offend you by using the h-word, but... could it be... human?”

Kirk’s really mad at Daystrom now.

The Commodore really set up that dramatic turn to camera there.

Poor Kirk. His ship is being used for evil.

“They can’t destroy the ship, what would happen to the computer?!” Yes, the computer. And the other 19 people and himself but mostly the computer. Daystrom really has lost it.

I love the actor who plays him, though.

“You are great. I am great.” Nothing weird happening here.

Spirk attack! (Spork it out.)

Spock’s way too sure Commodore Wesley is about to die. “He was decent, it’s a shame the ship I’m on is gonna kill him.”

And now another round of Kirk versus the computer and Kirk’s logic wins.

M-5 should argue that it did not commit murder, it committed homicide in self-defense. But then Daystrom didn’t program it with a lawyer’s brain.

It’s uh just gonna leave? Not turn the lights back on?

Kirk is so smart! I know I say this all the time, but it’s true! He knew what to do to save the ship because he knew Bob Wesley. He had formed connections, he had experience and knowledge that doesn’t come from logic. He is not replaceable!

McCoy’s like “Spock, fight me. Debate me Spock. Fight me. I’ll be fun.”

Spock HAS answered the computers versus humans question--he likes humans. He wants to be surrounded by humans.

That was really good! One of the better S2 episodes. Great Kirk, great triumvirate--as a trio and all three sides of the triangle--great sci fi concept, great guest star, great social commentary--still 100% relevant today.

i definitely have to think more about the ‘human computer’ concept. I liked that they specifically went out of their way to explain why the computer was human, how that was part of its design, and then tied that into its creator, his background, his belief system, and his insecurities. I feel like most ‘sentient computer’ or ‘advanced AI’ narratives just assume a computer that’s powerful enough will eventually be alive, which is not something I believe. The scariness of advanced AI to me is the incredible power it has to act quickly, but in a complete black-box way: you can’t literally see the logic string of its thought processes, and nor can you figure them out easily or completely using the creators’ intentions or logic because the machine has ‘learned’ since its inception, and its learning processes are not human. There is a real alienness to them that I find scary. And I do think this ep captured that nuance in M-5: it has the speed and abilities of a super computer, the “human” qualities of its creator for well-explained reasons, and the unpredictability of a mechanism that is NEITHER human nor human-controlled tool. And of course the ep’s ultimate thesis--that humans cannot be completely automated or replaced, and that we should not want to automate or replace humans--is comforting and of a morality I can and want to agree with.

This was also one of those eps that made me curious about the differences in AOS and TOS Kirk--in other words, an ep that relied on his history with Starfleet and his experience, on the reality that he’s a 34 year old man with 15+years of experience in the Fleet. Time, experience, connections, these aren’t things you can replace no matter how smart you are, and I feel like it would have been interesting to see AOS!Kirk deal with some situation that is trickier for him because he’s a Captain with a startlingly small amount of institutional experience. It’s not just about being young or generally inexperienced, in other words--it’s about NOT knowing every Captain, Admiral, and Commodore in the service, it’s about NOT having friends across the galaxy because he just hasn’t had time to make them. Even in deep space, that matters. And I think it’s something that I appreciate more as an adult myself, with actual real world experience of the importance of connections and experience and time, especially in sort of insular or smaller work communities.

Anyway, next is Bread and Circuses! Another great ep for the triumvirate. I can’t believe we’re almost through S2!!

[missaureus]

EXplOration in Manila Pt. 2

 My roommates finally arrived past 1AM. I was super drained but I still managed to put on my bear nail stickers while waiting for them. The moment I opened the door we were already squealing because we haven’t seen each other since my Davao vacation on January that year. We chatted randomly and eventually dozed off. We only had a few hours to be physically prepared for a hectic day ahead.

The concert proper was still at night but we scheduled to go to the mall area at 10AM to distribute freebies under Team Jongin PH. I was wearing heels and my feet were already crying. Obviously, I am not used to it and it was a poor decision. Cafes and restaurants near the arena were banning meet-ups and large groups who were giving stuff to concertgoers because it would obstruct other costumers. What would they expect in a day like this? We respect establishments and would not go out empty-stomached. But I cannot blame them. With that, we ended up being stationed in a wing way distal to the arena. 

Many familiar faces were spurting inside the café. I got to introduce to them using twitter usernames. It was hilarious. I even messed up with my other internet friends who I failed to recognize right off the bat! I felt so apologetic. Probably out of exhaustion, my sugar was depleting! 

Around 2PM, I had pasta and coffee as my lunch. I cannot indulge my palate that I had to share my small dish to a friend. My fight-or-flight hormone was doing its job generously that afternoon. I could not recall how much yards we had to stroll for unknown reason in and out the mall. 

After giving away those packed stuff, we took some pictures in front of the arena in groups. After that, we went back to the condo to freshen up and get ready to line up. With my sequence number, around 400, I was near the end of the line. Surprisingly, almost everyone in my area was from the province, particularly Bisaya. We finally realized how the provincial assistance failed us that year. Probably the worse experience I had due to the hectic announcements for the Manila leg. At that moment, a hint of regret was circling my thoughts. Was it a right decision that I did not bite that one under the table offer? I could have experienced a barricade line. I just ignored that bleak light of what-if.

Inside the arena, around 5PM, I was probably 5 or 6 lines away from the stage. It was way farther than my ElyXiOn stop but still a good and close view. There were still foreigners in our area. There was no sign of the event to start so I finally decided to listen to my feet’s plea --- to sit on the floor. The VIP area was more compressed than the first day. Thus, I had to stand in no time to reserve my spot. 

Around 6PM, the show commenced. The intensity of Filipino EXO-Ls’ heated cheer in response to the house rules was much more ear-splitting than yesterday’s. The setlist was not even rolling but one or two from our area were already dragged out, mostly foreigners. I swear, the level of security was not a joke this time! 

With the same pattern of Moonlight being played, it was a hint for everyone to mentally prepare. The 1st VCR played on the big led screens. The ghastly intro was beating in a rising intensity until the EXOs finally set foot on stage. By the time Tempo played, not only the lightsticks but also the phones were raised up high to shot fancams. I was so stressed I forgot how the moshpit game should be played. I had to brace myself for over 2 hours! People in the pit were starting to make waves out of pushing and eventually I had to stop my fancam during Transformer because the bouncers were barring my view when they were trying to catch another bull-headed fan pinpointed by Filipino fans. 

Due to the endless commotion, I was ushered to the side barricade and had the opportunity to step on the platform for a much elevated view. I was so afraid of stampede I did not dare to move an inch from my position. I anchored myself to the barricade. From there, I had a better view for Gravity which is a personal favorite. A choreography does wonder to a song!

Baekhyun came out with the backup dancers for UN Village after the 2nd VCR was shown. Undeniably, he appeared to be exhausted which was obvious when he let the fans sing most of the song at the end. The fans did not fail to par the energy of the song with its fanchant..

This was followed by the 3rd VCR then the powerful trio: 24/7, which played a huge part in my decision making of which ticket to buy. I was after Jongin’s position for this song. Unlike, ElyXiOn that each member had a fix spot every time they go scatter around, EXplOration was way opposite and random. All te members were so mobile throughout. Next, the general public’s favorite, Love Shot attacked. Followed by Oh La La La. 

The deafening shout from the crowd was breathed out when EXO started talking for the 1st ment. They individually introduced themselves with matching hello Philippines and mabuhay greetings. Finally, Monster! This was a stage missed out last ElyXiOn. I was happy to finally witness it live. The members then scattered on the main stage for Oasis. The led screen was an art it was dancing gracefully with them. Breathtaking!

A solo stage by the leader, Junmyeon, followed. Funnily, they were now confident to rip off in an oversea show excluding Japan and China. With that, the crowd was expecting so much from Been Through. The moment Junmyeon exposed his chiseled abdominal muscles, the crowd went crazier that the shouts reached the roof the arena. 

Finally, a ballad song! Jongdae entered the center stage and the light bulbs were simultaneously falling like stars. He sang Lights Out too perfectly and I commend the crowd for understating the sole assignment during this stage --- to stay silent to appreciate his vocals. The lights were already reflecting towards my tears pooling in my eyes. 

The SeChan duo then took over the stage after the 4th VCR. They entered the scene with their bigass luggage as props. They were playing with What a Life and Closer to You. After that, the rest of the members joined with Falling for You.

A brown couch was dragged to the center stage for Wait stage. This ballad number was so heartwarming when the crowd sang along with the EXOs as if it was a duet. They appeared relaxed. Literally, feeling at home vibe in the living room.

The 2nd ment started. SeChan playfully pointed their microphones to the fan to let then sing some parts of What a Life. As expected from Phixos, we are remarkable to the group as the loudest crowd among all hosts. The rule will always be, we do not do fanchant, we sing the whole song haha! The leader then teased Baekhyun with his sexy choreo in UN Village. Baekhyun did it  which made Chayeol crazy for it! Randomly, Jongin danced the sexy choreo of Been Through followed by Junmyeon. Out of nowhere, the crowd cheered loudly for Jongdae’s name suggesting for him to be next in line to do the steps. He was generous enough to do both choreos while singing Lights Out lol I swear they were so chaotic! After that, Sehun did it too! Chanyeol was not getting any free pass and the crowd cheered for his name next. He was crazy that I did not already care for his self-image at that moment. He did his own version of rolling hills and the crowd had gone mad for it! He eventually went near each member to grind at them lmfao! Guess what! Except for Baekhyun!!! Jongin had a secondhand embarrassment for this guy and even threatened to punch him. To end the chaos, the leader finally introduced Power as the next song. It was so fun there were also fireworks-like effects during the break dance part which was serve by the leader, supposedly it was Kai’s part but the members cheered for Junmyeon to do it this time. 

At this point, I was a battery at 2% already. I almost forgot what was next in line. A Kai solo! Jongin entered the main stage with the back up dancers, he was wearing a vest with nothing underneath it and a cap! To be honest, I loved his get-up on the first day more but the experience of him much closer to me is the best! I did the fanchant, I tried religiously but his performance was jaw-dropping that I kept on losing my focus, I went silent while covering my mouth! Surprisingly, he opened the only clothing coving his upper torso that finally exposed his amazing physique! By that time, I already got unleashed, I am still sorry for that crispy FUCK on my fancam hahhahahaha! 

Bad dream and Damage were performed on the main sage. I actually was not able to give my full attention to it because my phone notified I was out of storage. Out of impulsivity, I deleted all of my applications thinking that it would save me until encore stage. After that, EXO danced to the legendary title tacks in a form of a medley, Growl, Overdose and Call Me Baby. 

The 6th VCR was a hint that it was about to end and I went emotional. The boys playfully performed Unfair and On the Snow. The latter song is nostalgic. It is vivid how Jongin was enjoying this stage, wearing a black shirt and pants with his cap placed backwards.  SeChan were so cute during You give me yours, I'll give you mine part when Chanyeol gave the maknae a bouquet of flowers. The fans started throwing lots of stuff on stage, the floor got crowded. 

During the last ment, I befriended the person in front of me who is a Chanyeol-biased. We shouted in chorus Jongin’s name while raising a gom banner but unfortunately he did not respond. We just kept on laughing! We tried it to Chanyeol while waving a banner of him and he waved backed to our area enthusiastically using the doll he picked on the floor. While the others were busily doing their individual messages, ChanKaiHo were so bust playing with the coiled spring, I swear they were kids! 

During Jongdae’s part, the audience started chanting Walang uuwi! We also did this last ElyXiOn and finally this time it was already translated back to the boys! They kept on saying that they enjoyed the night so much with the fans and shamelessly said it was way better that yesterday hahaha! I had to agree. They said that they would love to come back to the Philippines for a concert and a vacation. During Sehun’s part, he secretly asked the translator how to say “Walang uuwi!” and Sehun said it back to the crowd cutely. Finally, after a year!!!

The leader finally introduced the encore song, Smile on my Face. The confetti were starting to rain and feel our faces. The harmonization was heavenly that I almost cried. To be honest, I was sad but happy at the same time. The boys then arranged themselves on the moving platform. Until the last time, Sehun kept on saying Walang Uuwi!. They faded before my eyes, it was surreal! Thank God for letting me see them twice in a row! 

I looked for my friends in the pit and cried in unison! We took pictures outside the arena with some of our friends and decided to look for a place to eat. It was actually raining cats and dogs as if heavens knew how heavy my heart was that it was finally over. 

We went back to the condo with my packed order hahahaha I do not know what was into me that I did not touch my food. I just quenched my thirst bottoms up with a soda full of ice! I was so silent after that hahahaha. 

We slept around 2AM after consuming our fancams. The next day, we had breakfast in Naynay’s condo. Hnnng I miss her food! After that, we parted ways with my condomates and met some of my friends also before heading to the airport.

It was raining. The weather turned my departure more melancholic that it should be. But when I reached the arrival area, I was so touched my whole family came to fetch me. Thank you for supporting me and my happiness. Thank you for allowing me to have this memory when I grow old. 

This is my youth.

[radramblog]

So you want to Nuz a Locke

For what I can only assume is a lot of people, the prospect of a Nuzlocke run sounds really intimidating if you haven’t done one before. I should know, it took a long time for me to dare to do one when I first got around to it- however, I am also a coward, and it turns out they’re not actually that hard. Here, I’m gonna give a quick rundown of tips and such for first-time runners, because they’re fun and good and I’d like to see more people do them.

Step 1: Choose a Game

Obviously, the first step is to choose which game you’re running. Obviously, I’d recommend starting out with a Pokemon game you’re relatively familiar with- one you’ve played a couple times before, or you’ve watched a shitload of playthroughs or something. Of course, not everyone’s a massive Pokenerd like I am, so there might not be an easy answer for this- as a result, I’m attaching here my opinions about how hard each main series game is for a vanilla nuzlocke. Tierlist time mother fucker.

With that in mind, I’d recommend not playing Gen 1 (Red/Blue/Yellow) for your first run unless you are very aware of the myriad quirks of the first generation, and I’d avoid Diamond and Pearl because….if you’ve played Platinum you know.

Also I’m just gonna say this now, don’t play a randomiser for your first run, holy shit. That level of chaos is not an accurate representation of how this tends to go. Also, don’t do a difficulty romhack for your first time, what is wrong with you mate??? You think Drayano isn’t going to beat your ass because he sure as shit is! Romhacks like Blaze Black/Volt White or fucking Radical Red are tough even for seasoned runners, but some people start out with that shit, and I do not understand that.

Step 2: Pick a Ruleset

Look if it’s your first time around just do a vanilla run, with only the two original rules (and the semi-official rule 0- nickname every Pokemon! It’ll hurt more when they die that way!)

I’ve seen a lot of players assume certain rules are on by default, like no items in battle or playing on Set mode, but a vanilla nuzlocke is literally just those two rules. With that in mind, I recommend the following add-ons:

- A variant of the dupes clause, limiting you from having multiple of the same species of Pokemon to increase variety.

- A clause to prevent overlevelling (e.g. can’t go above the next gym leader), though this can be awkward in some games.

- Some sort of limit to items used in battle, if only because Stall tactics are uninteresting and X Items are overpowered.

As for Sword and Shield, how to handle the Wild Area, DLCs, and Raids is kind of up in the air in the community at this point, still, so uhhh figure that one out yourself!

Step 3: Get a move on!

At that point you’re basically ready to go, given you have access to a copy of your chosen game- whether that’s on cartridge or an emulator is up to you. I recommend the latter, if only for ease of access and so you don’t have to erase some beloved save data. Also, emulators have Turbo. With that said, Sword and Shield are the first games where you can just have multiple save files (via multiple profiles on your Switch), so it’s less of a concern for them (also is there even a switch emu yet)

But at that point once you have a game, access to it, and the rules set up, you’re bloody ready to go aren’t you. BUT!

Step 4: Heed my advice.

Ok look this shit isn’t that hard but it’s not piss easy (unless you’re running ORAS lmao that game just hands you a mega legendary like OK???) so here’s some advice.

Take notes. If only so you know where you’ve got encounters already, especially when you’re playing a game with a lot of optional encounter areas (Hoenn’s sea routes come to mind)

Don’t turbo too hard. Especially with games in the first couple generations where you can go BRRRR through the entire game while holding the space bar, it’s super easy to not pay attention or get complacent and just lose mons for stupid reasons. So try to limit using that function, especially in more important battles.

Don’t run blindly into the dark. Look, some may call it cheap, but I wouldn’t recommend sprinting headfirst into every battle without some of the opponent’s movesets handy. Get yourself Serebii up, bring up Cyrus’s team or whatever, don’t get yourself killed to a surprise Heat Wave from a bird. Especially with later generations, surprise coverage is everywhere.

Don’t leave the house without your meds. As in, make sure you have appropriate healing items when you’re going places. The drink items (Fresh Water, Soda Pop, Lemonade, Moomoo Milk) are excellent value for money, so they’re very worth it when you have access to them (up until Gen 7 where items got rebalanced). As well, in generations 1-3, make sure you have Antidotes handy in the earlygame, lest you suffer the same fate as the original Nuzlocke Comic’s Beautifly.

Never give up. As long as you have backup, the run isn’t over. You can lose half your team and still win. You can lose your entire team and still win. The greatest victories come from the harshest defeats.

Never forget. Learn from the mistakes you make, so you don’t repeat them. It’s not especially common for a sacrifice play to be necessary, despite what certain people would tell you.

Grind like hell. It may be boring as shit, but don’t go in underlevelled, fam. That’s asking for trouble. Plus, grinding can be a sort of zen in a way.