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kaizokuou-ni-naru · 4 years ago

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The Voyage So Far: Dressrosa (Part One)

east blue (1 | 2) || alabasta (1 | 2) || skypiea || water 7 || enies lobby || thriller bark || paramount war (1 | 2) || fishman island || punk hazard || dressrosa (1 | 2) || whole cake island || wano (1 | 2)

fujitora’s introduction is so memorable. we don’t even know he’s an admiral until a little while after this, but the way he’s introduced makes him both immediately intriguing and tentatively likable, and also shows he’s terrifyingly powerful. similar to wano, dressrosa is a very twisty arc with a lot of hidden identities and things and people that are not what they seem, and fujitora’s introduction establishes that right off the bat.

it’s no secret i really like law, and i think his relationships and dynamics with the strawhats are some of the reasons why. it’s very good. the way he usually interacts with them (read: suffering) contrasts against the very real respect and faith he develops for them, and for luffy in particular. he refuses to call luffy his subordinate, here, even though it would be basically a get-out-of-jail free card when it comes to dealing with fujitora, and it comes up again more than once later in this arc too (though never to the strawhats themselves).

genuinely the tournament subplot is one of my favorite parts of this entire arc, especially because it happens while the action in the rest of dressrosa is mostly still setting up. it’s so fun to watch luffy go completely ham with minimal consequences, especially because we know more or less from the beginning that he’s not really likely to face a challenge from anyone here.

it allows the supporting cast to be built out as a pretty entertaining group in their own right, too, especially bartolomeo and cavendish, and sets up most of the future grand fleet without being too obvious about it.

i may as well say now, because i’m sure i’ll be talking about it a lot: kyros is one of my favorite one piece parents, and his and rebecca’s relationship hits me in the fucking chest. i’m consistently upset that they got so much stolen from them, and very very glad that they got the happy ending they dearly deserved.

i really like rebecca. and i like her story, too. i know there are people who want her to be more of a fighter, more violent, but i think that’s missing the point. rebecca is someone who has been victimized and commodified and put on display to die in front of a country that hates her again and again and again, and she still stays gentle and good, and i think that makes her one of the strongest characters in this arc.

obviously in isolation ‘damsel in distress’ is not really a good trope (and i’ve complained about it before with regards to tashigi in punk hazard), but i also don’t think it’s really at play here. rebecca is someone who deserves to finally lay down her sword and rest and be happy and safe, and her father deserves the chance to give her the protection he hasn’t been able to.

i really like when oda does things like this with paneling, i think it’s tremendously cool. there’s some similar examples with law’s powers in this arc and punk hazard as well, and it’s cool as hell every time.

this is one of my favorite panels in all of dressrosa.

kyros has a line a lot later on about ‘restoring the true dressrosa,’ and that’s what this scene makes me think of. this is the true dressrosa- the broken and forgotten and lost, down in the darkness beneath the city. and no matter what he may think of himself, riku is still their king.

this panel also reminds me of the similar scene in udon in wano, where the prisoners kneel before momonosuke. which is, incidentally, another favorite of mine. i really like whenever one piece deals in themes of loyalty, i feel like it always hits very hard.

[spoilers for recent wano chapters]

i think some parts of dressrosa line up very nicely with the recent reveal in wano that law’s new goal is uncovering the mystery of the will of d. it’s something that feels very natural and fitting for him, and i think this is one of the reasons why.

of the Ds we’ve seen, law is the only one who’s been really shown to be actively aware of the name and the weight it holds (and thus, the only one to bother to keep it secret), and he even weaponizes it against doflamingo throughout dressrosa in order to throw him off balance, and succeeds. it feels like a very natural progression from that awareness to trying to understand its mystery, at least to me.

barto is a great character because he’s introduced as being a completely unlikable shithead, and like, that’s not inaccurate, he totally is, but he also somehow winds up being likable anyways. part of that is his idolization of the strawhats (because, let’s be real, all of us can relate), but part of it is also that he’s kind of honorable in his own way, and i think him saving bellamy from dellinger despite having no stake in the situation just because they fought together is probably the best example of that.

i really like how the sabo reveal is handled. all the focus is placed on luffy and his reaction, and then we get our actual introduction to sabo as an adult slowly over the course of the next few chapters in how he acts and interacts with other characters throughout the tournament, culminating in his proper introduction after it’s over.

the actual explanation of what happened to him, how he survived and the entirety of his reunion with luffy is saved for the end of the arc, and i think it’s good that it happens there, in a quiet time after the dust is settled, rather than being smacked in the middle of the rising action.

of all the many many devil fruits that have appeared in one piece, i think sugar’s is the scariest, and also one of the ones i’ve probably thought the most about, if only in terms of its sheer inherent horror. the moment her spell is broken is, in my opinion, one of the most satisfying in the entire story. doflamingo’s hold over the entire country snaps, just like that.

the entire sequence of dressrosa’s great panic is one of my favorites in the whole series. i’m a really big fan of moments where the tides are all at once turned, and this is so very much one of those- sugar is knocked out; all the toys revert to human all at once, including kyros, who promptly decapitates (unfortunately not the real) doflamingo; sabo wins the tournament, eats the mera mera no mi, and obliterates the colosseum; and usopp becomes god.

it’s really really good.

even though this is a fake doflamingo it is very satisfying to see him get wrecked, and even though i love the outcome of the luffy and law versus mingo and trebol fight i do think kyros deserved to decapitate the real thing also.

usopp’s role and development in dressrosa is really great. it’s the most focus he’s gotten since water seven/enies lobby, and it comes at a time right when he’d been in the background for a rather long time. in dressrosa, he gets to be a proper hero- he indisputably saves the entire day not once but twice, and even doflamingo recognizes him as by far the biggest wrench in his plans- and more importantly, he gets to do it for the first time as himself, instead of having to hide behind a mask, as he did at both thriller bark and enies lobby.

the way a lot of the fight panels with doflamingo specifically are drawn is very cool, i think. there’s a real sense of speed and danger to a lot of them, which makes sense, as doflamingo is a very dangerous opponent fully capable of slicing off limbs and heads with ease if his enemies make a wrong move, something both the characters and the audience are fully aware of by this point.

to be continued in the next post with the rest of dressrosa!

#the voyage so far #one piece #opmeta #arc: dressrosa #long post #not japanese

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shadyafternoontea · 4 years ago

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Reconnect (Riku x F!Reader)

So a million years ago, I had this insanely vivid dream, woke up, keyboard smashed out the dream, and then just forgot I wrote it. Fast forward 1.5 years when I discovered it in my writing folder that I was organizing on a new laptop. This is a Riku x reader fic, and in my dream, Riku looked--idk--mid-30s? With a build like Dante (Devil May Cry). Was I reading @tehrevving smut at the time? Honestly, I don’t remember, but I probably was. But if you are thirsty for Riku, here you have it. There is like minimal/zero editing from my keyboard smash, so sorry.

Smutty smut under the cut from your girl.

@proximitybobomb @sunflowergem sorry I kept y’all hanging since...Sep 2019. My bad.

You smiled pleasantly at the people around you headed to the same party as you. Everyone was dressed well, looking dashing in suits and flouncy dresses in an explosion of color. It was a beautiful evening outside, but you felt cold though you weren’t quite sure why. You rubbed your arms as you passed one of the rooms to your left in the venue. You glanced into the room and your gaze caught on a pair of cerulean eyes that captured yours the moment you looked that way.

You didn’t remember stopping to stare. You didn’t feel the woman behind you stumble into you at your sudden stop or the pull of the gossamer fabric at your shoulder, threatening to rip, as the woman stepped on the trail of your dress in her attempt to re-steady herself. You didn’t hear the stuttered apologies as you turned and walked. The woman barely managed to step off your dress before it genuinely ripped—not that you would have even noticed at this point.

The lively clamor of the party died to a dull noise in your ear because you could hear nothing, see no one except the one man you had dreamt about for years but had left. He smiled, but it never reached his eyes. He had changed from the last time you had seen him years and years ago. He was taller, so much broader than before, and the crispness of his black suit accentuated the width of his shoulders. There were a few crows feet around the eyes now, but the piercing gaze was as clear as ever.

“Riku.”

When he spoke your name in return, the syllables sounded as beautiful as ever from his lips. You were always weak for this man.

His gaze chased your face, and you couldn’t look away from their depths. He was always so handsome, but it was his eyes that never failed to capture your attention. They were somber now, the mirth you used to remember reflected within their depths faded. His arm twitched, as if he wanted to reach out for you but thought better of it.

The jerking motion broke the hold of his hypnotizing gaze so you could see the rest of him. He looked even more handsome up close, the clean structure of his suit stretching over his solid build. He was clean shaven as usual, but perhaps you could detect the faint shadow of facial hair when there hadn’t been any when he had been younger. His hair was silver as ever, cut just above the shoulder like it had been when he was young. Your heart clenched at seeing him here, wanting something you had tried all these years to stop wanting.

“I didn’t think you’d be here,” you said.

“I wanted to see you.”

And just like that, with a straightforwardness only he had, the cards were laid out.

A disbelieving laugh escaped from your lips even as your heart stuttered at the exclamation.

“After all these years?”

It was a dumb question, and you knew it even as you heard yourself say them. You had wanted him every day for the better part of the last decade. You hadn’t stopped just because he had left without any promise of coming back to you.

“I’d want you forever.”

You swiped angrily at the tears in your eyes. “Fuck, Riku, why do you always do this to me?”

There were arms wrapping around you, pulling you into a warmth both familiar and strange now. It felt so good to be in his arms, surrounded by his heat and solidity.

“You’re the one who left,” you sniffled. It had hurt so much when the two of you had decided to part ways.

You didn’t fight when he used a hand to pull your own hand away from your eyes or when you felt the warm touch under your chin to tilt your head up. You couldn’t stop the electricity from shooting through you when the warmth of his lips descended on your own. The kiss was short and chaste, nothing more than a comforting press of pressure against your lips, but you could feel it—the feel of your heart racing, the warmth spreading through your limbs, and that hope you hated suffuse your heart.

“I made a mistake, like I always do,” he said, the hard edge of self-deprecation creeping into his voice. “I thought I was making the best decision for your safety, and it’s taken me this long to grow into some semblance of a man who understands that the only person who should have made a decision for your well-being was you.”

“And now you want me to forget all these years and be with you?”

He had the humility to look abashed. “No, but I’ve kicked myself for losing these years with you, and I figure I could at least have the sense to not waste the rest.”

You teared up again, hating the hope and the warm flood of emotion that threatened to emotionally overwhelming you. As you fought against the tears, Riku was already gently leading you to a small hallway and an alcove you wouldn’t have even seen, hidden by the large shrubs outside and the cordoned off hallway outside the room.

Before you quite knew where he was leading you, he had you against a wood paneled wall, curving around you, arms holding you into his own body. He was so tall now compared to when you were younger, that he quite literally surrounded you with his body even as his heat penetrated your thin layer of fabric.

His lips were at your ear. “What can I do to show you I’m serious?”

He didn’t wait for an answer before his lips trailed the span of your neck. You could feel the smirk against your skin when the color climbed your skin.

Fuck.

He pulled away though before he went further. A large hand cupped your cheek, and you looked into his eyes. There were like you remembered before—clear, but they were darker now, the pupils dilated. A shock of exhilaration went through you—he made you feel alive when he looked at you like that.

You should have pushed him away and told him that he had lost his chance.

You tilted your head up instead and kissed him. The change of his grip on you was instantaneous. The hard back of the wall pressed into you as the hard planes of Riku’s body pressed into the front of you body. He pulled way briefly to rest his forehead on yours. You were pleased to the color in his cheeks, easily noticeable against his alabaster skin, and the slight tremor of his hands where they cupped your cheeks.

“What do you want me to do?”

You gulped as the feel of his body against yours and the feel of his arousal pressing into your stomach made you feel heady and dizzy with the anticipation of pleasure.

Fuck it.

“I want you to take me.”

You barely got the words out before he mouth covered yours and he deepened the kiss. Hands left your cheeks though you could feel the imprint of their warmth still and swept down the curve of your body. The trace of his hands over the side of your body, only grazing your breast made you release a frustrated noise into the kiss. But when he corrected his path to sweep back up and graze your covered nipples with your thumb, you broke the kiss and titled your head back with a gasp.

As touches went, you weren’t ever this over-sensitive, but the feel of Riku touching you had you trembling in anticipation like it was your first time. His lips traced the line of your jaw and then trailed down your neck, stopping to nibble and suck at the sensitive skin at the junction of your neck and shoulder. You gasped at the sharp press of his teeth at the skin at the swell of your breast and then moaned when he soothed the bite with his tongue.

His hands traveled over the curve of your ass and down your thighs to the side, bunching up your dress and pulling the fabric upwards to reveal the smooth skin of your thighs. The cool air hitting your legs did little to quench the way you felt too warm.

You were flushed when he kneeled and you could feel the traveling soft pressure of his lips descend. You clenched at the sudden feeling of the heat of his hands against the bare skin of the back of your thighs when they slipped underneath your dress. You jolted when the tips of his fingers grazed your pelvic bone at the waistband of your underwear. He slipped them down your legs, helping you take one foot out. You'd have taken the other out, but he was too fast and had already disappeared under the sheer fabric of your dress. You clamped a hand to your mouth just in time before you gave a loud moan when he licked you.

He hadn’t forgotten what you liked, and when he slipped two fingers into you, you clenched around his fingers hard, your gasps and moans thankfully muffled behind your hand. You would have wondered how he managed to remember after all these years, but he always was very talented in whatever he did.

You began to ride that swell of pleasure right before you reached the point of no return. He slowed down to prolong your edge, and then chuckled when you gave a groan when he stopped. You twitched around his fingers as he slowly withdrew them so you wouldn’t go over. Your nerves felt frayed at being the denied the release you were craving, but you craved him more and he knew.

Dazed and breathing heavy, you watched him look up at you and pierce you with his gaze as he licked his fingers clean. When he rose, he managed to undo his slacks with one hand while he pulled your hand away from your mouth. You bit your lip when you saw his cock, but you didn’t have a chance to mull over how much you had missed it before you were lifted, your underwear still dangling off one foot rather comically. You wrapped your legs around his waist, impressed by his strength.

He held you above him, the head of his cock brushing against your entrance. The feeling was tantalizing and you moved as much as you could against it. He nipped your throat in response.

“Tell me what you want,” he murmured against your skin.

“Riku, p-please.”

“Tell me,” he said insistently, “and I’ll give it to you.”

“I need you in me—I need you to fuck me. Please!”

It seemed that was enough. He thrust against you slowly, groaning at the feel of entering you for the first time in years. The stretch burned, but you wanted more of him. You wanted to take all of him. You gave a short groan of frustration when it seemed he couldn’t go any more.

He gave a soft chuckle at you and raised his head to look at you. He gave a look of appreciation at the way your head was titled back against the wooden panel, mouth slightly agape and softly panting, and the way the blush of color had spread all across your face and neck.

“Hey, look at me.”

You obeyed, flexing your head forward and meeting his gaze, as unfocused as yours.

He pushed forward slowly and met more resistance.

“I can’t—”

“Hush, it’s okay.”

He leaned forward and kissed you, working in with shallow thrusts that had you moaning into his mouth at the sensation of fullness. You tangled your hands into his hair and pulled him more securely into you. You relaxed, and then gave a moan of surprise when he closed the last remaining distance between the two of you and buried himself fully.

He kept still for a brief moment, letting you acclimate. You let him feast on kisses while you relaxed around his length.

“I love how you feel around me,” he murmured against your lips when he finally started to move. “So fucking good.”

You made some non-coherent noise in response to his slow, hard thrusts. A fast stroke and then a slow deep slide into you had you clenching around him. He picked up the pace, burying his head into your neck, thrusts hitting harder. The angle had him grazing the peak of your sex with every thrust, and it had you panting appreciatively into his ear. It had been so long since you’d had him in you. Every nerve felt primed and over-sensitive. The heat of his breath striking your neck to the feel of his suiting jacket against your exposed shoulder to the feel of him inside you stoking that fire that had been quenched for so goddamn long had you arching against him in pleasure.

You let go of his hair with one hand, smoothing it roughly down his back to keep him pressed to you.

He felt you fluttering around him and slowed down, pulling away to look at you, a smile pulling at his lips at how flushed and dazed you looked.

“Better tell me when you’re coming, sweetheart.”

You managed a nod before he picked up the pace again. It didn’t take you long before you the rise of pleasure rose, and this time he kept going, taking you swiftly past that point of no return, determined to make you cry out his name.

“I-I’m cum—” you couldn’t even get out your sentence before you fell over that precipice. “Ri—” You gasped against his neck as your entire body tightened and your most intimate muscles clenched over and over and the pressure of his cock inside you sent you flying even higher.

Riku clenched his teeth against his orgasm as he felt the way you gripped him. He could barely thrust against you with how tight you had become, but finally, he couldn’t help it as you finished riding that high. He thrust hard and as your body clenched hard around him once more, he couldn’t help coming then, spilling inside you with a satisfaction he hadn’t known in years.

You barely heard him curse against your neck with the way blood pounded in your ears, but it sounded highly complimentary. You both shook at the force of your orgasms, foreheads buried into the other’s necks. It was a comforting feeling to still have him inside you as you came down from your high. When you could muster the energy to move, you pulled away, both hands coming up to cup his face and tilt his head back towards you.

You kissed him softly, warmth spreading inside you as he kissed you back. It wasn’t long—you both needed air. Riku untangled your legs from his waist, slipping out of the warm confines of your body, and set you down, keeping a tight grip on your waist as your legs wobbled. You tucked him back with still shaky hands, wondering what he was going to do about his slacks. You looked down farther to see your underwear still dangling on one foot.

You couldn’t stop the giggles at the situation, but then felt mortified when the giggles turned into sobs.

With the acute pain of regret of ever hurting you, he held you to him, running a soothing hand on your back.

“I—miss—missed—y-you,” you hiccuped into his chest.

“I missed you too,” he murmured into your ear. He held you securely against himself until your tears stopped and you had ruined his white shirt with your makeup.

He lead you to the bench set on the far side of the room, which you first attempted to reach on wobbly legs before Riku nixed that idea and swept you up. He set you down gently, kneeling in front of you. He gently swatted away your hands from your eyes and used his own handkerchief to gently wipe away your tears and ruined eye makeup.

You looked ridiculous. You had never been more beautiful.

He hadn’t seen you in years, and here you were, looking radiant as ever, grown into your own being, and you hadn’t pushed him away. He was humbled and a little more than ashamed that he had been the cause of your sadness.

In an uncharacteristic moment, he stammered out his apology as you finished sniffling. “I’m sorry.” He couldn’t bring himself to meet your eyes; instead, he looked at where his handkerchief rested in your lap.

“Will you stay with me?”

He met your gaze then, a hand coming up to cup your cheek. His heart warmed when you instinctively leaned into him.

“As long as you want me,” he answered truthfully.

You gave a short laugh amidst the sniffles at the sheer absurdity your day had taken. But here he was, very much in your presence, willing to correct the mistake of your past.

“I want you always, silly man.”

His lips quirked up and then broke out in a silly smile reminiscent of his youth. “You call me silly,” he said as his hands ran down the calf of your leg. Your breathing quickened and the sensual feel of his hands gliding down the length of your lower leg. Until they hooked onto your panties and gave a playful tug.

You snorted, mood rapidly improving. “That, sir, is your fault. You couldn’t let me shake it off before distracting me.”

“I can’t help it when all I wanted to do was be buried inside you.”

You sputtered at his boldness. He was much more a tease than he had been before, if that was even possible.

“You play so dirty!”

“You’re calling me dirty,” he said, working your other leg back into your underwear and sliding them back up, “when you’re the one sitting there with my cum between your legs.”

Your cheeks burned as you stood up, hypersensitive of the sticky remnants of the two of you between your thighs. He looked up at you, eyes burning with desire as he slid your underwear the rest of the way. His hands rested a little too long on the curve of your ass when he was done, and then his hands were gone.

He rose and then frowned when he saw you: your hair was a mess, there was a stain on your dress, and a very noticeable hickey blossoming on your neck. You looked hot as fuck, and he couldn’t wait until he could take you again, but perhaps this was not the best setting. He shrugged out of his suit jacket and slipped it onto a surprised you.

“Maybe we should get leave.”

You raised an eyebrow at the mark on his slacks. “You think?”

He followed your gaze and groaned. “Looks like we both got wrecked.”

“You’re still the same, you know that?”

He leveled a cheesy smile at you. “If you mean hopelessly in love with you, then you’re right.”

“I love you too, Riku,” you replied. You closed the distance between him, settling your head against his shoulder and wrapping your arms around him. He was more than happy to wrap his own around you and secure you against him. “Don’t you dare try to leave again.”

He only smiled, wrapping his arms tighter around you. “Not without dragging you with me, I promise.”

He needed to find a way to get them both out, but for the moment, he only held you closer, content to enjoy the peace for which he had been searching for years.

#Riku x reader #kingdom hearts #smutty smut smut #silver hair just does it for me #and when you're kind of a bitch but have character development #honestly riku woke up some shit in me ya feel

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currantlee · 4 years ago

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Language: English Rating: Teen and Up Audiences (T) / P16 Warnings: Heavy topics Fandom: Kingdom Hearts Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort Characters: Sora, Roxas, Xion (mentioned) Relationships: Sora & Roxas Words: 4,312 Chapter: 1/2 Chapter Summary: The best part about birthday parties is that everyone gets to share the happiness. So when Roxas isn’t feeling well, Sora takes it upon himself to check up on him Beta: @theeeveetamer Notes: Written for the 19th Anniversary of the Kingdom Hearts series. I’ll admit I haven’t really done the “happy” part justice though. Other Platforms: -

Sora had expected all the usual things returning home. The sun burning on his skin, the sound and smell of the sea, his mother demanding an explanation, not actually feeling at home on Destiny Islands anymore, being told to rest some more…

If he was completely honest though, Sora didn’t actually know what he had been expecting. He hadn’t really thought about it… The most important thing was that he was back home safely.

The one thing he definitely hadn’t been expecting though was a party.

So this was why Kairi had curled her hair… He turned to her in confusion, but seeing her smile so brightly in what surely was expectation of his joy made him turn to Riku instead. He didn’t want to disappoint her.

He scratched his head in a bit of embarrassment. “Uhm… You really didn’t have to organize a welcome-back-party for me…” It wasn’t like he deserved one anyways. Not after all the worries he had caused them, and after everything he had done in the past year.

His best friend chuckled lightly in response. “Do you even know what day today is?”

“The day after… Uhm… Yesterday?”, Sora offered, glancing at Kairi in a search for help. Gosh, out of all the things he could have said, it had to be the dumbest… He was absolutely clueless about what there, so he just stayed silent when Kairi shook her head.

Luckily, Riku took over before his silence could become even more awkward. “It’s the twenty-eighth of March.”

Oh… Oh! That meant…

“Happy birthday!”, everyone shouted in unison.

---

It was supposed to be a joyful day for everyone involved. The thing Sora loved most about birthday parties was that everyone involved got to share the happiness. As such, he always tried to make sure that everyone felt comfortable at his own birthday parties, regardless of whether it was a surprise party or an expected one.

So when Xion told him that Roxas wasn’t feeling that well, Sora insisted on checking up on him, even though she mentioned that he wanted to be alone. He made sure to grab some ice cream before he went to look for Roxas.

It didn’t take Sora very long to find him. He wasn’t really hiding somewhere, but even if he had been Sora knew all of the best spots from hours of playing hide and seek on the Play Island with Riku and Kairi back when they were kids.

Sora found him was sitting under the paopu fruit tree, back leaning against its trunk, legs drawn close to his chest and chin resting on his knees. He was staring at some undefined, distant point, apparently lost in thought.

Sora knew that if he just walked up to Roxas and sat down, it would probably startle him. Therefore he approached him more slowly. He also tried to be more quiet than he usually would be, while also not avoiding noise completely.

Only when Roxas turned to him, looking a bit surprised, he finally addressed him.

“Hey Roxas, you alright?”

Roxas sighed in response. “Shouldn’t you be with your friends?”

Sora sighed as he slowly walked up to him. He wasn’t sure if Roxas was comfortable with being so close, so he wanted to make sure to not pressure him. But to his surprise, Roxas lightly patted the space besides him and nodded. Sora took the invitation and sat down.

“Xion said you’re not feeling well,” he explained. “I just wanted to make sure that you’re okay.”

Roxas didn’t give him an answer to that – he just let out a sigh and turned away again.

But Sora wasn’t about to give up that easily. He carefully placed a hand on Roxas’ shoulder – feeling the texture of his jacket and not feeling it at the same time, like through a glove, was a sensation he’d probably never get used to. “Can I do anything to make you feel a bit better?”

Roxas shook his head in response. “No.”

Sora wasn’t sure whether Roxas’ honesty was an expression of trust or just how he was as a person – but either way, it impressed him. He didn’t even know Roxas that well, since they never really had a chance to get to know each other properly…

“Please, don’t worry about me,” Roxas added quickly. “This is your party, I don’t want to be the one ruining it for you.”

Sora knew that feeling, perhaps way too well. He hated to burden his friends with his worries too, even though he knew that, to some extent, that’s what friends were for. “Is that why you didn’t say anything to Xion? Because you also don’t want to ruin the party for her?”

Roxas sighed. “Yes,” he openly admitted.

“You know, I think she’d be less concerned if you talked to her…”

“I don’t need a lecture from you,” Roxas cut him off a bit roughly. “I can handle myself just fine…”

Sora backed off a bit at that. “Sorry. I just thought I’d go and see if you need anything, really.”

Roxas’ expression actually softened a bit at that. “There is nothing you can do right now, I think. Just leave me alone, I’ll be fine.”

He actually smiled when he said that, but it wasn’t a happy smile. There was melancholy in it, and he actually looked a little bit lonely.

Sora didn’t know if he should really leave him alone like this… On the other hand, it was like Xion said: no one could – or should – force him to talk about whatever was upsetting him.

So he just asked: “You sure?”

Roxas nodded. “It’s okay,” he said. “I like being alone, sometimes.”

“Alright,” Sora said and got up again. “But please tell me if you need somethi-…”

The ice cream package he had grabbed from one of the enchanted buckets containing the food earlier tumbled to the ground. Sora had almost forgotten about it. He had thought that maybe this might do some good for Roxas’ mood as well. Hopefully it hadn’t melted yet…

Roxas face lit up when he saw the packaging. “You… You brought me some ice cream?”

Sora bashfully scratched the back of his head and nodded. “Yeah, I thought it would cheer you up a little! Sorry, I kinda forgot that I still had it…” How could he actually be this dumb?

But Roxas didn’t seem to mind. He just chuckled. “Thank you.”

… He was smiling. Actually, genuinely smiling this time. No underlying melancholy, no looking lonely. Huh. Maybe that little mishap had managed to cheer him up a little bit after all. Perhaps it was a good thing that Sora could be a bit forgetful sometimes.

“No problem,” Sora grinned. “Just tell me if you need anything else, okay?”

Roxas nodded in response, while already ripping the packaging off the popsicle. It was a bit melted already, but that was to be expected.

It was good to see that Roxas was a bit better now. Hopefully, he’d soon join the others again. Sora smiled as he turned to do exactly that.

“This whole birthday thing…”, Roxas suddenly said. “It just reminds me…”

“Huh?” Sora turned around in surprise. Could Roxas possibly have changed his mind? If so, then he was of course going to listen, but he had seemed very adamant about it before. Maybe he was just thinking aloud or talking to himself?

“You were born seventeen years ago,” Roxas mused quietly. “But I was… Created… Almost three years ago.”

Oh. So that was what this was all about…

Admittedly, Sora had never thought about it like that. To him, Roxas had been his own person ever since he’d first learned of his existence. And even though most other people shared this view by now, that didn’t change the fact that initially everyone had only regarded Roxas as a different version of Sora, or even a part of him. He hadn’t even been treated like the independent personality he was, but like a replacement for someone else, or even worse, like a tool.

In addition to this, he didn’t enter this realm like… Well, like most other people. Seeing as Roxas’ biological age matched Ven’s from the moment he first came into existence, he had never had a real childhood. From what Sora had heard about Roxas, he had lacked a lot of abilities at first, and was still lacking a lot of the knowledge the others naturally had.

That also meant…

Sora thought about his own childhood memories for a second. Racing with Riku on the beach, painting the walls of the Secret Place with Kairi, making plans for the raft that ended up starting their entire adventure… He had seen so many worlds, experienced so many things, met so many people, made so many memories – and yet, his childhood memories were his most precious ones.

His heart ached when he realized that Roxas didn’t have any of that. Aside from maybe some of Sora’s own memories that he knew weren’t his own… Sora didn’t really know about that part.

He went back and knelt down next to him. “I’m sorry, Roxas.”

Roxas shook his head. “It’s not because of you,” he said. “It’s just that except for Xion and Naminé, all of the others…” He let out a heavy sigh. “I’m not… It just feels like all of this isn’t real, Sora.”

Sora watched as one of Roxas’ hands curled into a fist.

“I don’t want to feel that way. After all, that’s exactly what they wanted me to feel like… I don’t want to give them that satisfaction, even though most of them are gone now.” He laughed bitterly. “Funny, huh? Even now, that I’m not bound anymore, I still can’t be free. Why does this have to haunt me all the damn time… Why can’t I just shut it down…”

Sora carefully placed a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to calm him down. Roxas was panting now, perhaps a result of getting emotionally worked up and trying not to shout.

“The heart isn’t always logical,” Sora tried to explain. “Contradicting yourself sometimes is part of having one, especially when it comes to feelings.”

“Is that why it is so difficult to understand sometimes?”

“Probably,” Sora replied. “But you don’t always have to understand it, you know?” After all, why should anyone try to understand something that was impossible to grasp? It was only a waste of energy, energy that was better spent elsewhere.

Roxas shook his head. “Maybe that works for you,” he said. “But you’ve always had a heart. I haven’t.”

“You had Ven’s heart,” Sora argued.

“That’s not the same.” Roxas retorted. “The emotions I felt? At least in the beginning, they were still his. I don’t know when I started having my own, but… That doesn’t change the fact that it weren’t mine.” A heavy sigh escaped him. “Who knows. Maybe they still aren’t mine…”

“Why shouldn’t they be?”

“Because my entire life, everything about me, is a lie,” Roxas hissed. “My surname? Something Naminé and I made up. Childhood memories? I have none of my own! Every time someone asks I have to tell them a story, and I’m not even sure it happened like I’m telling it! My birthday? I was never born in the first place!”

Sora didn’t know how to respond. He tried to understand, but he probably couldn’t. After all, he had everything Roxas mentioned – or in other words: everything Roxas didn’t have.

Regardless of that, Soras heart ached. Roxas deserved so much better than having all of this come back to haunt him again and again. Distantly, he wondered if that would ever stop, if his former Nobody could ever truly feel like somebody. He really hoped he could. Roxas deserved as much.

“The diary I kept during my Organization days and my passport say that I’m… Born,” Roxas pronounced that word with a good portion of spite in his tone, “on the second of September, but…” He didn’t finish whatever he had been about to say. Instead, he averted his gaze back to the horizon and took a bite from the ice cream.

Sora flinched when he did that. He never understood how people were able to do that – it hurt him to just look at someone doing it.

“Is it… Is it because you feel like that date is just made up too?”

“Like everything else about myself,” Roxas nodded. “At least when it comes to maintaining world order.”

Oh yeah, world order… Sora truly hated that concept from time to time. He often found it hard to not constantly rave about all the amazing things he had seen on his travels to everyone he met on his travels – after all, it was just far to exciting to not share with someone.

But Sora understood why it existed.

Truth be told, Sora had always had a hard time not talking about exciting things. Whenever he had seen a fantastical new movie as a kid, or read a new comic that amazed him, he would always talk nineteen to the dozen about it to either his friends on the islands or his parents. They all had a hard time following him.

Sora had fortunately realized this soon enough, and since he didn’t like to be a burden to his friends and family like that, he had learned to explain things in a manner that was more comprehensive to someone who didn’t know what he was talking about. That sometimes included leaving certain details out or explaining things in a much different manner than they actually happened in the movie. He had found that those tactics came in handy when trying to keep world order as well.

“You know,” Sora said, “it’s always a balancing act to keep world order. We all leave out details or change parts of our story whenever we tell someone who doesn’t know about the Keyblades or other worlds. Sometimes, we even have to make up stuff as well.”

After all, if they did tell the truth, they would probably get labelled crazy or dangerous in most worlds. Even if that didn’t happen, it had the potential to cause much more trouble.

And thinking about it some more…

“Honestly, everyone does it from time to time, even completely normal people who don’t wield Keyblades. Even though they do it for different reasons,” Sora continued. “You’re not so different from everyone else in that regard, Roxas.”

“Fair point,” Roxas murmured. “Still… Normal people are born. And they usually know when.”

“Well, it’s not like you don’t know the day you first came into existence,” Sora pointed out.

“That’s not the same!”

“You’re right. It isn’t exactly the same,” Sora replied. “But it’s the closest thing to a birth date you have. Besides, you know the exact date. So that is definitely real.” Just as real as Roxas himself was, and just as real as his emotions were – and Sora was pretty sure those were just as real as his own.

“If I was a normal person, I wouldn’t even need to pick the closest thing to a real birthday though,” Roxas argued.

Sora shook his head. “You know who is a ‘normal’,” he made air quotes as he phrased that, “person and still doesn’t know on which day she was born?”

“Now you’re making things up…”

“I swear I’m not!”

Roxas didn’t respond to that. Instead, he just looked at Sora, still somewhat sceptically, but also with a bit of curiosity in his expression.

“Kairi.”

She had only been a child when she had fallen from the sky all those years ago. Her memories of her home world were foggy, now and back then. All she had remembered was her name, that she was from another world, and that she had never even heard of the Destiny Islands before.

“We’ve always celebrated it on the twelfth of August,” Sora elaborated further. “That’s the day when she appeared here. Besides, I’m pretty sure Ven doesn’t know his actual birthday either.”

Roxas furrowed his eyebrows. Was he thinking about it?

“Maybe you should talk to one of them, if that makes you feel more comfortable,” Sora suggested.

But Roxas shook his head. “They won’t understand it either,” he argued. “Honestly, I think none of you can really understand…”

“Maybe they don’t have to understand everything to help you.”

“Still.” Roxas let out a heavy sigh. “They… All of you at least have something to build your identities on! Me? Xion? Naminé? We have to look for it, but the more I find, the more I question if all of this is even real, if all of this is even truly mine! Even my body was made in a…”

Now Sora was the one averting his gaze. Yes, he knew exactly what Roxas meant, at least with the latter thing… But he wasn’t going to bring that up now. This was about Roxas, not about him.

“Sorry,” Roxas said. “I didn’t mean to remind you…”

“It’s fine,” Sora interrupted him. “I just… Kinda don’t want to talk about it to be honest.”

“That’s okay.”

Sora turned to Roxas in surprise. He wasn’t… Angry about that? Sora had kind of expected to be condemned for that – after all, he had kind of made him talk, even though Roxas initially hadn’t wanted to.

But Roxas just smiled. “I think you might feel better if you do though.”

Probably. But Sora didn’t want to bother his friends with this. They wouldn’t understand… Well, Roxas, Xion and Naminé maybe would, but Sora didn’t want to stir up any more old memories for them, especially now that Roxas was already upset.

So he just shook his head. “It’s fine, I can handle it.” He had come here to help Roxas with his problems, not to load all of his own problems onto him after all. It would be unfair… Besides, Sora didn’t want Roxas to think that he had to help him now because he had ruined the party for him – which was why Roxas hadn’t wanted to talk in the first place.

“You know, I think I can handle it too,” Roxas argued. “If I couldn’t, I wouldn’t have offered it. And I know I feel a bit better after talking to you.”

Sora sighed. “You won’t…” He cut himself off. No. That was exactly what Roxas had been trying to tell him earlier, and Sora had tried anyways.

“I don’t know how to explain this,” he finally admitted. Even though they were in a similar situation regarding this.

“Maybe I don’t have to understand everything to help you,” Roxas answered, echoing what Sora had told him earlier. “Besides, I can ask questions, you know?”

He had a point with that, Sora had to admit… Actually, starting out with a question didn’t seem like the worst idea.

“Have you… Ever felt like your body isn’t really yours, Roxas?”

Sora wasn’t really sure about that part. Perhaps Roxas knew that feeling, since he had been about to say that his body had been made in a lab – but it was just as possible that he had only used this as an argument when overthinking his feeling about being not real. Sora just hoped that he wasn’t bringing any negative thoughts or memories back…

“Depends on what exactly you mean by that.” Roxas responded after a while. “If you mean knowing that your body was made in a lab, that it technically isn’t the same as everyone else’s is… Then yeah, I know how that feels.”

Honestly, Sora was fine with that. It wasn’t like they could have smuggled his body out of Quadratum too. Getting his heart out, past the borders of the different realities and back into the Realm of Light, had been difficult enough. At this point, he was just glad to be back with his friends.

“I mean it more like… Are you getting weird sensations sometimes?”, Sora asked more quietly. “Like… As if you’re feeling things that aren’t really there?”

Roxas furrowed his eyebrows. “What?”

He probably thought Sora was crazy now and maybe he wasn’t even wrong with that. Even Sora himself sometimes didn’t know whether he was still sane.

Spending that last year in Quadratum, isolated and without anyone to interact with or a possibility for escape, had taken a toll on him. Yozora and his team hardly counted, seeing as they were the ones who had caused him the most trouble during his time there.

… Sora had done… Quite a few things he had thought he’d never do… Or at least he hoped he wouldn’t have.

He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to focus on the tension that action caused rather than the resurfacing memories. Those things he did – he could never undo them ever again. They would probably haunt him forever.

He lowered his head. “Sorry,” he mumbled. “I’m probably just crazy…”

Roxas shook his head. “Vex-… Even says that it’s almost impossible to tell a Replica apart from a normal human body, but there are some differences,” he explained. Apparently he still hadn’t gotten used to calling the former Organization member by his real name. “Maybe it has to do with those?”

“I don’t know,” Sora confessed. “Have you ever felt like you’re wearing gloves despite not wearing any, and that sensation kind of overlaps with the sensation of what you’re actually touching?”

That was likely not what Roxas had been expecting. His expression changed from a concerned one to an outright shocked one. “You should definitely check in with Even. That’s not normal, Sora, at least in my experience.”

“I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be, it’s probably just that your Replica needs a few adjustments.” He gave him a smile that was probably supposed to be encouraging, but it couldn’t disguise the worried look in his eyes. “Trust me, that happened to us too.”

“But what if it’s not about that? What if there is something wrong with me instead?”

Perhaps he was turning this into a far bigger deal than what it actually was, but after everything that had happened in the last year…. Sora was seriously scared that some dark part of him was taking over permanently and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Being in Kairi’s heart for a while had been soothing, like taking a long nap in the warm sun. But even that couldn’t fully undo the damage that had already been done.

“If that’s the case, then we’ll find another way to help you.”

Sora lifted his head to look at Roxas in surprise. He just said that… Totally casual, but with confidence, like there was no problem in the first place.

“What if you can’t?”, Sora whispered. “I might be here again, but… What if I’m still lost forever?”

Roxas shook his head. “There is always a way.” He gave him another encouraging smile. “That’s something I’ve learned from you. You always insisted that I had a right to exist, even when you were told that it was impossible for the both of us to exist next to each other.”

He wasn’t wrong about that, Sora had to give him that. But this was an entirely different situation! Roxas may have been a Nobody when he first came into existence, but he had never been potentially lost to the darkness like Sora was. Roxas hadn’t done all, if any, of the things Sora had done over the past year.

… In moments like these… Sora wondered if it would have been better if he had just died. If not after abusing the Power of Waking to save Kairi, then in Quadratum. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to live anymore, in fact he was glad to be alive still, see his friends again, but… If he had died, he wouldn’t have to live with those feelings. That was just a thought that crossed his mind sometimes, starting when he was still in Quadratum.

“You never gave up on me,” Roxas said as he gently placed his hand on Sora’s shoulder, who almost forgot about the strange feeling of heavy fabric that deafened the sensation. “Don’t you dare give up on yourself, Sora.”

“I…” He sobbed as his vision became blurry.

Roxas… Was right.

“Sora, it’s okay…”

Before Roxas could say any more, Sora pulled him into an impulsive hug. He didn’t really know what he was doing… It happened before he could think about it.

“Thank you!”

Roxas didn’t react immediately, and for a short moment, Sora feared that he had pushed him out of his comfort zone – but then, he felt two hands on his back. “You’re welcome,” Roxas said. “And… Thank you too.”

“No… No big deal.” Sora still couldn’t hold the sobs back. But he didn’t even try to not cry this time around. It was okay.

They sat together in silence for a while after resolving the hug, each of them lost in their own thoughts.

Sora still felt a bit guilty. He had come to comfort Roxas after all – but in the end, Roxas had ended up comforting him instead, even though he knew he probably didn’t need to. After all, it was like he had said: he could always say no.

So it was probably okay… Or at least, it would be.

He was back with his friends now. Whether he was messed up or not, with them on his side, he would heal over time. As long as he didn’t give up on himself – there was always a way. His mind already knew that, and his heart would hopefully soon follow up.

“Come on.”

“Huh?” Sora hadn’t yet noticed that Roxas had stood up. Now he was offering him his hand, as well as another encouraging smile.

“The others are waiting.”

#Kingdom Hearts #KH Fanfiction #*sigh*#... I didn't do the happy part in happy birthday justice #I'm sorry #Sora #Roxas #Angst #Hurt/Comfort #Heavy topics #Fanwork #Fanfiction #Long Post #Re:Birth #Currantlee writing #Currantlee completed #Currantlee completed Story #Currantlee completed KH Fanfic

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writingpaperghost · 4 years ago

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Chapter 11: Will I Ever Be More Than I've Always Been?

There's a lot going on. Too bad Mayu doesn't have much of a clue about it.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22967815/chapters/81590014

It’s been a week since Zero left and Mayu had managed to fall into a nice sort of rhythm, almost like Zero had never happened. She hadn’t even seen Kurow, who didn’t even appear at school anymore. Occasionally, she wondered what he was up to (but what good would that do, worrying?).

She’d, admittedly, had some… odd feelings, in that time, though. They were hard to explain, sort of like someone was watching or following her, but whenever she looked, there was no one. (You worry too much) She hadn’t said anything about it to anyone, yet, but she was starting to think she should.

The bright side about Zero being gone, though, after she told the others about it, was that she had a lot more time. She’d chose to spend that time either in her little garden, or with Noa. But whenever she was with Noa, she couldn’t help but think about the conversation about her that Mayu and Zero had had, before he left.

What if someone else hadnoticed that strange energy Zero mentioned? What then? (You’re worrying again)

She was starting to think that Noa was noticing how distracted she was. She should probably talk with Noa about that, too.

Mayu scrolled idly through her phone, sitting on the ground in the garden, leaning up against a particularly large rock. She’d just finished watching a video of someone building a really large wooden bag of popcorn, then filling it with a lot of popcorn and using it to prank some friends. She wasn’t sure what she wanted to do at that moment, so she filled the time with watching videos instead. She supposed. Setting her phone down for a moment, she learns her head back and closed her eyes.

Not knowing what exactly to do with herself, like this at least, was a bit of an odd feeling for Mayu. She was trying to get through it, at least, but it wasn’t exactly easy, since she didn’t really know what she was trying to get through. Maybe she should just add it to the list of things she should talk to Noa about. (Not that you actually have to talk to her about any of it) Which she should get around to doing. Soon.

When she opened her eyes, the sun was starting to go down. She frowned and checked the time on her phone. Mayu hadn’t thought she’d spent so much time out (Yet you have, one way or another), but it seemed like she had. Standing, she dusted herself off, feeling more tired than she’d thought she would have, given how little she’d really done today. (Oh, how little you’ve done… Yet it’s a lot more than you think.)

Mayu shakes her head to clear it of her straying thoughts, she should head home before her parents start worrying.

---

Once more, Mayu checked her phone for the time. There was no way that she just spaced out for three hours. Not when she had an alarm set to remind her to meet up with Noa. The alarm had been set for what was now two and a half hours ago (Noisy thing). She texts Noa, apologizing for being late, but saying that they really needed to talk. Because they did, she’d put it off long enough. There was a lot to talk about, she just had to figure out what to start with.

Noa’s already at the park where they were going to meet, sitting on one of the benches. She waves when she sees Mayu, “Hey, what’s up?” She already sounds concerned, which is fair, all things considered.

Mayu sits down beside her and considers what to start with. “Well, I’ve been having this… strange feeling, I guess. Lately.”

“Like what?”

“Like… Like someone’s watching me. Or following. But every time I look… I don’t see anyone.” Mayu sighed. She hadn’t exactly realized how much that had been stressing her out, not that sharing it with Noa made it much better. “But it’s not just that, now.”

Watching her carefully, Noa notes, “That’s already pretty bad.”

Letting out a scoff, Mayu can’t help but agree, “Yeah, well you know how I missed even saying anything to you until two hours after we were supposed to meet?” She didn’t wait for Noa to answer, “I closed my eyes and next thing I know it’s two hours later. That’s not the first time something like that has happened. I keep closing my eyes and then next thing I know an hour or more has passed…”

“Oh, Mayu… That’s…”

“I’m scared, Noa,” Mayu says quietly, “I don’t know what to do.”

Noa’s face scrunches up as she thinks, “Maybe you should tell someone else about it? It’s pretty concerning…” She pauses, again in thought, “Maybe Riku or something? It’s definitely not normal.”

Shaking her head, Mayu can’t agree, “No, I don’t want to worry them.”

“But Mayu,” Noa pleads, “You’re scared and I’m worried. I really don’t think this is something you can just brush off…”

“I just… I don’t think it’s worth worrying them about,” Mayu insists, “Not yet.”

“If you say so…”

“They’ve got a lot more to worry about then whatever I’ve got going on,”

That’s where the conversation ends. It’s not until Mayu gets home that she realizes she forgot to talk to Noa about the strange energy she apparently had. She’d have to tell her some other time it seemed.

---

Mayu’s on her way home from school when Kurow appears seemingly out of nowhere. She jumps a bit, but otherwise is glad to see him. She’d been starting to worry about him, after she hadn’t even so much as seen him.

“Oh, Kurow, I was starting to wonder if something happened to you,”

“No,” He responds, then rather awkwardly adds, “Have you been… well?” He sounds unsure if he’s speaking correctly.

With a small and awkward laugh, Mayu responds, “Uh, yeah, I guess. Haven’t exactly been doing much, Zero left to go do some stuff, so I’m just kind of… existing, I guess,” She shrugs, “What have you been up to?”

He stares at her for a moment, before also shrugging, “Not much, I guess,” Then, his brow furrows ever so slightly and he adds, “Well, I guess I’ve been looking into some things.”

“What sort of things?”

“That’s not… That’s not very important. Don’t worry about it,” They stand in silence for a moment and Mayu wonders if she should just go back on her way. As she begins to take a step away, Kurow speaks up once more, “Listen, has everything been alright? I think I’ve seen you just… Walking, the past couple weeks. But not like normal… Like you’re not yourself.”

Mayu blinks. That doesn’t sound right. “You have?” Kurow’s face twists into something that mightcount as worried and he nods. “I don’t… remember that.” She thinks for a moment, before admitting, “Although… I’ve been having these moments of losing time. Like, I close my eyes and then it’s an hour later.”

Kurow looks surprised at that, “Mayu that’s not normal,”

“I know,”

“Who else have you told?”

“Er,” She begins sheepishly, “Noa?”

“Just Noa?” Kurow sounds like he can’t decide whether to be annoyed or something else. At least as much as he ever seems to. “Mayu, you should tell someone else. One of those other friends of yours, maybe.”

“They already have too much on their plate,” Mayu says, and she thinks if she says it enough, it will become more true, “I can’t bother them with this.”

“Somehow I don’t think they’d be bothered,” Kurow sighed, “But since it seems I can’t convince you… Just be… Careful or something. I don’t know.”

She regards him for a moment, wondering if this really was the Kurow she’d been beginning to think he was. “I thought you didn’t care,”

His shoulders tense up and brings one of his hands out of his pocket to rub at his forehead. It’s a weirdly human gesture, one that she’s not used to seeing on him. “It’s just. Ugh,” He groaned and Mayu thinks that maybe he’s a bit better at expressing emotions than she’d thought. “It’s different with you.”

Mayu wasn’t sure how to respond to that, “Ex-excuse me?”

“I don’t know how to explain it,” He sounds a bit angry, or annoyed, when he said it, “Just, keep out of trouble or whatever.” And with that he turns around and leaves, leaving Mayu standing confused. What had just happened? Was Kurow sick or something? That seemed a bit out of character for him…

Or maybe he just cared about her, as odd of a thought as that was. (But why would he?)

---

Kurow was not sure what to make of the revelations that Mayu had so nonchalantly dropped on him in their conversation. He’d sought her out both because he’d seen her acting so odd, but also because he had genuinely wanted to see her – as much as he hated to admit that. Now though, he had other things to worry about. While Mayu didn’t want to do much about her odd blackouts, Kurow wasn’t just going to sit around and do nothing.

What was it that she said, sometimes? Sitting around doing nothing won’t get you anywhere.

So he was going to get up and do something. He’d already been looking into a lot of alien activity in the city. He’d found out that the Pitts had been working for someone and he wanted to find out who. He managed to trace them back to a group of Alien Dadas who were working for a group of Alien Babarus, who were working for a group of Alien Magmas. Those Alien Magmas were working for a guy named Emari, a nasty alien from several galaxies and a few dimensions over.

Emari seemed just like the type of person that an Ultraman like Zero would be chasing after. Kurow was certain that Emari’s appearance on Earth being shortly followed by Zero’s was no coincidence. This meant that Emari most likely knew that Mayu was Zero’s host… He might have been watching her and might have known that Zero was gone.

That didn’t actually explain much, though. A part of the problem was that Kurow had no clue what Emari could do. There wasn’t really a good way of figuring that out on his own. He needed someone who might have that information…

Which is what brought him to Noa, Mayu’s friend. Kurow, even now, wasn’t sure what to make of her. She seemed like a normal human, but there was something about her that wasn’t quite right. It wasn’t always very obvious but… But he just wasn’t sure. Either way, as much as he hated it, he needed her help.

In some uncanny manner, she manages to notice him before he’s even very close to her. She waves and calls out, “Hi Ayumu! Haven’t seen you in a while.”

He waits until he’s closer to actually speak to her, “I need your help with something,”

Noa jumps, startled and looking at him like he’s grown a few extra pairs of appendages, “Did you just… You can talk?”

Kurow rolls his eyes, “Yes, now listen,” And Noa does, “I need you to take me to those friends of yours. The AIB. But you can’t tell Mayu.”

At that, Noa looks like she’s about ready to fist fight him if she has to, “And why not?”

“It may have something to do with her… moments of losing time, so to speak,” He tells her, trying not to look to bugged, “She doesn’t want anyone to worry about it.”

Noa’s face scrunches up, “Then why are you, of all people?”

“Because I think it has to do with a lot more than she thinks.”

She doesn’t respond immediately, looking like she wants to argue. Then her shoulders fall, “Alright, then. Off we go, I suppose.”

As it turns out, Noa’s idea of taking him to meet the AIB was meeting up with them in a park. Which was fine, he didn’t really care, so long as he was able to speak with them. Standing beside him, Noa crosses her arms.

Across from him is Moa, and beside her is who he can only presume is Zena. Moa smiles at him, “Kurow, it’s good to see that you’re… okay.”

Kurow rolls his eyes, “Let’s not waste time,” He said bluntly, “I’m only here for one reason. You remember those Alien Pitts?”

“Oh, the ones that were chasing after you?”

“That’s not the important part,” He reminds them, “I did some… digging. It turns out that those Pitts were connected to an alien called Emari. You might know him as the reason that Ultraman Zero was on this Earth.”

Zena expresses even less emotion than Kurow when he says, “That shouldn’t be a problem for you,”

Kurow can’t help but feel… something… flare up. Not exactly annoyance, but close. “It’s not, but that’s also not why I’m here,” He acknowledges, “Emari’s still here, he knows that Zero left, and he knows that Mayu was Zero’s host.”

Moa’s eyes widen, “You think she might be in danger?”

Looking away, to the side opposite of where Noa stands, Kurow simply says, “I’m not discounting it.” Then he adds, “Not to sound… Rude, I guess, but in a fight between a stick and Mayu, I think the stick would win. If someone wanted to do something to her, there wouldn’t be much she could do on her own. She might not even be entirely aware it’s happening.”

After having spent the whole conversation listening, Noa butts in, “Wait, do you think that’s what’s been happening?” And Moa looks confused at the question, while Zena doesn’t seem to react at all. That shouldn’t make Kurow feel like it does. It proves to Kurow that the two really didn’t know about what had been going on with Mayu. She really was stubborn. The expression on Noa’s face shifts to what can only be fear, “Kurow. Kurow. What do you think has been happening?”

He turns to face Noa, “I think, I’ve seen her in places she wouldn’t and shouldn’t be, acting in a way that she probably never would of her own accord.” He states bluntly, “I think, she hasn’t been in control of her actions during those times, nor is she aware of it.”

Across from them, Moa looks terribly shocked. Almost as though she can’t believe what she’s hearing. Zena, though, is the one who speaks, “You think that Emari is controlling her,” He states, because it’s clearly not a question, “But you don’t have anyway of figuring out if that’s something he can do. That’s why you’ve come to us.”

“Bingo,” And if Kurow were a different person, he’d grin. Instead, he let his lips twitch a little, “Got it in one.”

Zena regards him for a moment, not that Kurow has any clue what might be going though the other Alien Shadow’s head. Finally, Zena responds, “It’s certainly something we have evidence to say he can do,”

“But why?” Moa asks, “What’s his goal?”

There’s a few things that Kurow could suggest. To use against Zero, to use against the AIB, to use against him. But he doesn’t say any of them, instead, he just shrugs. “Could be plenty of things.” And that’s all he actually says on the matter.

“There is one question I have for you, Kurow,” The way that Zena says his name, though unemotional and blank, bugs something in the back of Kurow’s brain. It takes all of Kurow’s self-restraint, all his barely repressed annoyance and anger at what he’d gone through before being thrown off his planet, not to just stop and straighten up. But Kurow, contrary to what one might think, is actually a bit of a spiteful being. So he doesn’t and Zena continues, “Why are you going through all this trouble? It doesn’t benefit you.”

Some part of Kurow knew that someone would ask the question eventually, it doesn’t surprise him that it’s Zena. There’s a lot of ways he could answer, but in a situation like this, the real reason isn’t one that should so simply be tossed about. After a moment of thought, he answers, “Mayu’s… A nice person. She’s kind in a way that makes me think she does it to spite everyone who thinks she shouldn’t. It would be a shame if something bad happened to her. And it would be bad for everyone here if Emari does something to this planet, like he clearly wants to. So I’m just doing my part so I don’t have to go find another planet to live on.” He turns around, “This one’s kind of nice-“

He sees something, out of the corner of his eyes. He can’t make out what exactly but… Then he sees it again. This park is pretty much empty save for them, so any movement stands out. For a similar reason, he’s only slightly surprised that the Alien Magma he sees moving isn’t disguised.

“Magma,” He says, then dodges out of the way of the Magma’s incoming hand. Except, instead of trying to grab him, it goes for behind him. The only person behind him is Noa.

Noa makes a sound that’s a mix between and scream and a gasp as the Alien Magma grabs her arm and pulls her towards him. She tries to wiggle her way free, but the Magma seems to have to tight of a grip on her. The Magma moves back away from them as Kurow moves forward to try to pry the Magma’s hands off Noa, he’s followed by Zena and Moa.

The Magma is moving too quickly though, “Thanks for leading me right to what I was looking for, Shadow,” The Magma says in an annoyingly smug manner, “The Boss will be really happy about this.”

Attempting to elbow the Magma, Noa yelps, “Hey! Let go of me!” This has little effect, unfortunately, and the next thing anyone knows, the Alien Magma and Noa are gone.

Moa stares at where the two were just a moment before, “…What…?”

Kurow, though, realized that Mayu’s weird but not so weird friend was a lot weirder than he’d initially thought. At least, if the Magma’s interest and search for her was any indication. As far as Kurow was concerned, it was.

The Magma had mentioned having been looking for Noa, which seemed pretty odd. Unless it wasn’t Noa that the Magma was looking for? But then why would he say that he had been? Then he thanked Kurow – presumably the Shadow he was referring to – for leading him to her. That obviously meant that the Magma had been following Kurow. He’d probably been doing it since Kurow had tracked down the Alien Magma base, when he was following the thread from the Alien Pitts. The last thing that the Magma had said was that “the Boss” would be happy about him getting Noa. Kurow could only assume that “the Boss” was most likely Emari.

There were a lot of things in that train of thought that was bad. “I should go,” He glanced at Moa and Zena, before turning to leave. “I have things to do.”

“Wait,” Moa scrambles, “What do you mean?”

Kurow holds in the feeling of a sigh, debating with himself if he should tell them. He has no reason to trust the AIB, but they were also probably the best equipped to deal with this, at least until Zero returned. Even then, there was no guarantee that Zero would be able to do much about Noa, given everything with Mayu.

Some part of Kurow gave him an odd feeling at the thought. He didn’t care much about Noa, except what reasons that the Magma – and more importantly Emari – might want her for. But he didn’t want to see something bad happen to Mayu. He also knew that Mayu would probably be upset if something happened to Noa. So, he supposed that the thing he should do is try to tell them at least something about what he’s planning. Even if he didn’t really want to.

“Zena, have you ever noticed anything… strange, about Noa?”

Zena’s expression didn’t change, not that it ever did, “Perhaps,” He says, not really answering Kurow’s question, because of course he wasn’t, “You think that it might have something to do with the Magma kidnapping her?”

Shoving his hands in his pockets, Kurow hopes he portrays how obvious he thinks the answer to that question is, “I’m almost certain,” It was the only real answer, “Why else would anyone go through the trouble of kidnapping an otherwise average human?”

“Then,” Zena begins, “Do you know where the Alien Magma base is?”

Looking between the two of them, Moa looked a combination of concerned and just sort of lost. She looked between the two of them. Kurow debated what to do from here. He could tell Zena and Moa where the Magmas’ base was, but there was no guarantee that Noa was even there. He was certain that Emari had his own base, and once he got ahold of Noa – however long or short of a time it took for that to happen – she would surely be there.

“It might not matter,” Is what he chooses to say, “There’s no guarantee that by the time you get there that she’s still there.”

“Oh,” Moa chimes in, “You think that Emari will bring her to wherever he’s hiding out.”

“It’s certainly a possibility,” Zena considers, “We’d need to know for certain where Noa is.”

Considering his options, Kurow wondered if he was really about to say what he was pretty sure he was about to say. It was incredibly stupid and not really worth it, but for some reason, he felt inclined to. Maybe Mayu was rubbing off on him an ungodly amount. “I could figure it out,” He said, after much deliberation, “I know where the Magma base is, and I could probably get in there unnoticed. I’d be able to see if she’s still there.”

“That’d be very dangerous,” Zena responded, “And what would you gain from it.”

“I’m offering to help you,” Kurow couldn’t help the edge in his voice, “Don’t question it too much or I’ll just leave.”

It was then that Moa intervened, “That would be very helpful, Kurow!” She said, with a terribly enthused smile on her face. He was pretty sure she was faking it, but it was probably for the best someone intervened regardless, “We’ll let you get to it.”

Only after that and Moa dragging Zena off, did Kurow realize that he didn’t really have a way to get it contact with them even if he wanted to. Well, he figured he’d manage, one way or another.

---

On the outside always looking in,

Will I ever be more than I’ve always been?

Mayu wasn’t entirely sure where this was. It seemed like her garden, but something was… off. There was this sort of haze around the whole thing that made it feel like all the details were blurry. A fog lingered across the ground and in the air, while it felt like just beyond the edge of the trees, something was lurking.

She wasn’t sure if she was imagining it.

‘Cause I’m tap, tap, tapping on the glass

I’m waving through the window

When she tried to go past the trees, she’d find herself walking into the fog. Once she’d exit the fog, she’d be right back in the garden. She’d tried over and over again, until finally, her legs were too tired to keep trying.

I try to speak but nobody can hear

Do I wait around for an answer to appear?

Sliding her back down the rock, she came to a sitting position on the ground, with her back against the rock. She brings her legs up to her chest and wraps her arms around them.

While I’m watch, watch, watching people pass

Waving through the window

She’s so terribly alone. Alone, scared, and confused. What was this place? Why did she always end up back here? How did she get her?

Can anybody see?

Is anybody waving…?

She’d accepted she wasn’t getting any answers.

When you’re falling in a forest and there’s nobody around

Do you ever really crash or even make a sound?

When you’re falling in a forest and there’s nobody around

Do you ever really crash or even make a sound?

Did I even make a sound, did I even make a sound?

It’s like I never made a sound

Will I ever make a sound?

#like father like daughter #mayu igaguri #my writing #ultraman

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landprince · 5 years ago

Text

I thrive off validation so here’s the soriku WIP so far I’ve got more left to write and this will likely be changed another dozen times before I’m satisfied

straight up I wanna know if I made it too spicy because my partner has now worried me about that

Fear held him tightly in its icy grasp. It was a chain that wrapped around his torso and kept him tethered to the kitchen floor, it kept him from running even if he currently had the ability to realize that he should really be running.

His heart, such a frantic thing now, fluttered about inside his chest worse than a bird with a broken wing. It battered itself against his ribcage, bruising and wounding with each pump of blood that coursed through him.

Is this what it feels like before people die? He thought as the looming figure in front of him dipped it’s head closer.

A sharp inhale. The scent of sweat and copper.

Sora shut his eyes as cool lips pressed against the tight column of his bowed neck. A shudder wracking down his spine at how careful and genuine the kiss was. It was almost as if he wasn’t about to be devoured by a monster and instead was receiving a lover’s kiss.

His fingers dug into the fabric of a shirt, tugging closer the cold body that was hard and unyielding against him. His head lolled even more to the side, abundantly baring pliant flesh to the creature that pinned him against the rickety fridge in his apartment. He could feel the heat of the blush blazing across his skin, and when the blood bloomed underneath the tissue he could feel how Riku became more excited and pressed him harder against the front of the fridge.

If he wasn’t seeing stars before he surely was now.

Magnetic letters clattered to the floor as the appliance creaked in protest the weight of two men against it. He wondered if it might be best to move somewhere else, but before he could continue that train of thought something cold and wet dragged along the juncture where the neck meets the shoulder.

“I promise to be as gentle as I can…” Cool breath blew over saliva slicked skin and this time his knees nearly gave out. The gentle graze of teeth followed Sora whimpered out a pathetic noise caught between a whine and a moan.

His eyes squeezed tight as he gave a sharp bob of his head once in acknowledgement, desperately trying to will his heart to pause it’s marathon long enough that he could suck in some air without his chest aching. He looked up into pupils blown wide while surrounded in a sea of blue-green.

“I know. I trust you, Riku.”

Hands were on his face, tilting it upwards enough that he could connect with the lips that were on his skin mere seconds ago. His racing pulse finally settled and for a moment he thought it stopped altogether as two mouths melded perfectly together.

It was heaven.

It was torture.

Distantly he was aware of the affectionate gesture of his hip being stroked by Riku’s free hand, but he didn’t have long to ponder on the notion before the tang of copper filled his mouth.

He was bleeding and a sudden panic flared to life inside his chest. The broken bird of his heart once more clashing against the bars that were his ribs as the vampire pulled back, eyes no longer holding any trace of that lovely shade of seafoam he adored and now a deep inky black.

“Sora--” Riku’s voice was strained, the blood on his lips honestly probably too much for him at the moment. His gaze was darting back and forth between Sora’s eyes and mouth. “Are you really sure?”

Warmth now spilled down his chin while the vampire stared at him with a starved expression.

A low rumble sounded from deep within Riku’s chest and seemed to reverberate into his own. The scrape of metal made him wince momentarily as Riku dug his nails into the seemingly fragile door of his fridge.

The vampire had his teeth bared somewhat, fangs poking out past his lips. He was hungry, and Sora knew that if he said no Riku would be okay and stop immediately. He truly did care for him and didn’t want to hurt the fragile human.

He’d never really seen Riku’s fangs before now. Sure, he caught a glimpse a few rare times, but up close they looked so much bigger. Sharper. And, oh gods, they were going to sink into his neck and the thought excited him if anything.

What could be more intimate than sharing your life with someone you deeply cared for?

“I told you: I trust you,” he mumbled, sounding even to himself just a tad unsure. His tongue darted out to lick up some of the blood on his mouth, suddenly self conscious of the potential rudeness of bleeding openly like that.

He knew it was unfair to Riku to just bleed like that in front of him. But Riku had him pinned so all he had to work with was his own tongue and the back of his wrist to wipe away the last sluggish flow of crimson.

Digging up some more resolve he let it saturate his next few words. He wanted this, he really did, and he wanted Riku to know he wanted to be bitten. “What kind of a friend would I be if I didn’t help you get food? And I know you would stop before I-- well, before I would die.”

His body once sang with tension, but now every muscle felt leaden as the adrenaline crashed and he slumped against Riku’s chest, knowing his weight meant nothing to the vampire, and allowed Riku to just hold him upright for a while. Talking about death, about dying, was terrifying, but he truly did trust Riku with his life.

“I promise to always treasure this, Sora. This gift, this moment, all if it will become a very dear memory for me,” Riku vowed as he resumed his gentle stroking of the sensitive skin right above his hip.

The urgency of the need to feed seemed to have settled down into a stable simmer once more. The rumbling in Riku’s chest no longer something loud (and scary!) but a soft rumbling that resembled a content cat’s purr. If they were on his bed Sora could fall asleep to the soothing sound.

“That’s so sappy.” Sora scoffed out a little snort as he shoved his face into Riku’s shoulder. As embarrassed as he was, he couldn’t let Riku see the silly grin that was now plastered onto his face. “You’ve been reading terrible poetry again.”

Cool breath washed over his ear when Riku laughed, causing Sora to let out a soft hiss as gooseflesh broke out across his skin. “Wrong. Those penny dreadfuls you hate so much.”

“Ugh, those are awful. You would think after living so long you would have taste.” The words dripped sarcasm, but both men knew there was an inkling of truth within it all as well.

“I chose you,” Riku drawled out as he nudged Sora’s face out of the crook of his neck.

“You made one good choice and that’s it.” Sora looked up at Riku with a half lidded expression.

Sucking in another breath to steady his nerves he pushed the jelly from his legs and managed to hold himself upright once more. His arms laced around broad shoulders and his fingers gently tugged at long strands of silver hair. “Please, eat before my heart tries to fall out of my chest again.”

Another laugh spilled from Riku.

Riku kissed him again, tongue pressing into one of the no-longer-bleeding divots in his lip and coaxing back some semblance of blood flow. The twang of metal once more splashed against his own tongue as the kiss turned into something macabre, but Sora couldn’t care as the vampire pressed hard kisses against him that ran down his jaw, his neck and a few stray ones peppered across the top of his chest.

The scrape of something solid against his jugular made him jolt momentarily before he felt fingers gently scratching his scalp in an attempt at alleviating the sudden nervousness that flooded his system. Riku could no doubt hear the sudden upkick in his heart rate and was trying to keep Sora calm in order to keep himself in check.

His own teeth dug deep into his lower lip, close to breaking skin but never quite managing to get through. He breathed in through his nose, fingers digging into the strong muscles of his friend’s back as he steadied himself.

Sora barely managed to muffle the cry that escaped him when Riku bit into him.

One Year Earlier

He wasn’t a regular, not really, but Sora had seen his face enough to be able to pick it out in the small crowd that always seemed to appear inside the bookstore he worked at.

#ark.txt #ark.WIP

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nadziejastar · 5 years ago

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How do you think Axel would have been viewed if he was a woman, but otherwise written exactly the same?

I think a female Lea (Leah?) would have been very popular. She’d be a breath of fresh air considering how stereotypical most female characters are. She’d have as many fanboys as Lea does fangirls. I don’t think she would have been shipped with Roxas as much, though. I just don’t think it would have been as popular if it weren’t a yaoi pair with an uke and seme. If anything, I think people would have assumed she was a lesbian, lol. But that’s just my speculation. I think her relationship with Saix would have been far more acceptable to see as romantic if she’d been female, whether Saix was male or female. Female/Female relationships are just more socially acceptable. If Axel had been a girl, I’d still like her with Isa.

Lea the Crybaby

“Even if we don’t see each other, it’s more important that we think about each other all the time, anyway, right? …Got it memorized?”

Roxas grinned. “It doesn’t suit you, saying things like that.”

Those words were meant to make them feel better, but… if I went into that, I’d look weak. “Shaddap,” said Axel, looking away.

Xion laughed. Roxas found it funny too, and he started to laugh.

“Is it that funny?!” Axel asked almost unconsciously.

Roxas and Xion stopped laughing for a moment, but when they looked at each other, they burst out laughing again.

If Axel had been a girl, he wouldn’t have to be written or perceived any differently. I don’t think there’s anything about his personality that couldn’t have been possible in a female character. Heck, I think many aspects of him would have been more accepted as a female character. If he were female, he would have been perceived differently, though.

And because of that, he wouldn’t have been robbed of all his emotional depth in KH3. As a Nobody, Axel had balls of steel. He smiled even as he was disappearing. He always smiled through the worst pain. He was a total hardass. It’s a big reason why he became so popular. Most of the male fans I know in real life liked Axel because he was a total badass in Castle Oblivion. And he was. He was cold and ruthless and COOL. All of that is fine in female characters, too.

“I want everybody I meet to remember me. Inside people’s memories, I can live forever.”

“I know I won’t forget you. Believe me, I try all the time,” Isa replied with a bit of humor in his tone.

“See? I’m immortal!”

“You’re obnoxious.”

But Axel was not naturally cold and badass. He became that way because he was VERY sensitive. He was a very multi-dimensional character. You can especially see it in the novels. He was so softhearted that he became desensitized to pain. That’s how he was able to smile all the time. In BBS, you can see he’s not really “badass”. He’s a huge dork that gets teased by Isa. I’ve seen some fans (mostly male) dislike the direction they took him in Days and BBS because he seemed too nice. But that’s the real Lea. A kindhearted, lovable, childish dork.

On the sofa opposite him, Naminé spoke up instead. “Sora and Riku are best friends.”

Axel’s eyes crinkled as he remembered his own best friend—the only friend he’d ever had, in fact.

“If your best friend goes away, you’re sad, and if you get to be with them, you’re happy,” Naminé added. “Isn’t that how it is, Axel?”

“…That’s about the size of it.” Axel nodded and sat down on the remaining empty sofa, staring at the sea-salt ice cream he held.

“So you are capable of sincerity,” said Riku.

Axel only shrugged at the jab and finished his ice cream pop.

I think Axel became more flat and was reduced to mainly comic relief in KH3 specifically because the KH3 team was afraid of the backlash they might receive if they did what they were originally gonna do with him. The were scared to go all the way and take his story to its natural conclusion because he’s male. Probably because it would change the way people perceived him. He’s not really as cool and badass as people thought. If he had been female, this side of his personality would have been embraced. But as a male, it was much more difficult to pull off, and ultimately, Square was too cowardly to do it.

He’d never deluded himself that tracking down Riku would be easy, and neither had Saïx. It was just that if he went back and reported that he couldn’t find anything, he would have to deal with those attempts at “personality”—the sneers, the snide remarks, the only trappings of human emotion that Saïx ever showed. Not that Saïx was even capable of annoyance or disappointment, of course, what with the lack of a heart and all.

Heading up the slope to the station, Axel bit into the ice cream bar. “This stuff is so salty,” he murmured to himself, as he often did.

Axel was a very deep character. He had many sides. Kanemaki was a writer on Days and I think she had a lot to do with how fleshed out he became. Due to his trauma, he appeared to be very stoic and other times very carefree. But deep down, he was very vulnerable. He hated showing it. He hated it when people saw him cry. He hid his feelings very well. Roxas and Xion never saw the emotional side of him. And many fans didn’t either. Axel was still smiling the last time he saw Roxas in person, when he said let’s meet again in the next life. He only cried for the first time in KH2FM. The scene didn’t go too far. It was ambiguous if Roxas could even tell Axel was crying. Axel never allowed himself to showed true vulnerability with Roxas.

“Let’s meet again in the next life.”

At those words spoken with just a hint of a smile, Roxas nodded quietly.

“Yeah. I’ll be waiting.”

There was something funny about Roxas’ serious answer, and Axel laughed.

Same with Kairi. And that was the problem. Axel/Lea was more emotional in KH3. He had a heart, so it’s only natural. He cried with Kairi, but ran away afterwards. When he reunited Roxas and Xion, he cried again. But IMO, that wasn’t the catharsis he really needed. He was still bottling a lot of strong feelings up. He never has a scene where he has to confront his emotional baggage and deal with it. He never had to deal with the fact that he was using Roxas as an emotional crutch for much deeper issues.

Then someone else spoke behind him. “I’ve been waiting for you, Axel.”

“Yeah, I figured you’d show up.” His smirk turned nastier as he turned to see Saïx. He didn’t take his eyes off the other man as he spoke to the girl in the cage.

His final fight was robbed of almost all emotion. It didn’t feel like he had anything to fight for. He lacked passion or a strong purpose. Look how many people say that Lea shouldn’t have even gotten a Keyblade. The fight wasn’t for Axel and Saix to finally settle their issues. It felt more like Roxas and Xion were the stars. Then the stupid Subject X crap was shoehorned in.

Lea is mostly known in KH3 for having a few quips where he breaks the fourth wall. His humor was allowed to be played up as much as possible. But, he wasn’t allowed much genuine emotion. Despite having a heart, he felt more hollow than ever in many ways. His reunion with Roxas and Xion was…cute? I guess? To me it felt forced. Lea still acted kinda “meh”. Roxas and Xion were crying, and he was still trying to play it cool. He was never allowed to take his mask off. He still never had true a moment of emotional catharsis.

You’re ultimately still a crybaby, but you don’t need the marks anymore.

The truth is, Lea needed a resolution where he wasn’t forced into the cool and aloof big brother role. It’s why the Roxas and Xion reunion didn’t provide any closure to his character arc. Lea wasn’t really aloof, like he acted on Day 96. He was super emotional. He needed someone to be truly 100% vulnerable with. The only character to know that side of Lea was Isa. And it’s obvious that “Lea the crybaby” is something that revolved around his relationship with Isa more than anyone. It’s mentioned in Isa’s Character File story.

The sunset stung my eyes. I’ve been a bit of a crybaby lately. I wonder if it’s because the upside-down tear charm is gone.

And also Lea’s Character File story called “I Will Not Forget You”. His character arc in KH3 was “resolved” by hastily reuniting with Roxas and Xion and “working it out” with Saix. But…it really wasn’t resolved at all.

Axel suddenly broke his silence. “Well, even if things change, we’ll never be apart—”

“—As long as we remember one another,” Xion finished. “Right?”

The day the ‘Winner’ stick was finally mentioned, it’s called “Sunset” and Axel told them they’d never be apart. He was acting like nothing was wrong, even though he knew there was barely any time left for them to be together. He never let Roxas and Xion know how sentimental he was. On Xion’s “Day 6″ she disappeared. It was called “Tears”. That’s the day Axel finds the white envelope with the stick in it.

Maybe, this is the last time I’ll see Saix, too.

Thinking, Axel looked at the seated Saix’s back. “We’ve known each other for a pretty long time, haven’t we?”

Ignoring Axel’s words, Saix continued typing on the keyboard.

“Say something. Have you even thought that maybe I can’t erase Roxas?” Axel said, in a playful tone, and Saix finally looked up. “It’ll be all right. ‘Cause I’m tough.” Axel puffed out his chest.

“How stupid,” said Saix, and for a moment he smiled. “Let’s hurry up and prepare. Time is limited. The hero will wake up soon, too. I’ll send you in right in front of Roxas.”

“Okay.”

Axel stood in front of the sending device. Saix rested his finger on the button.

“I’m off the~n!” Waving to Saix, Axel’s figure disappeared.

On Roxas’s “Day 6″, Axel had a very emotional exchange with Saix after looking at the white envelope. He was bonding with Saix just before he attempted to eliminate Roxas. He joked with Saix about it. That sends a very powerful message about the nature of Axel’s feelings for Saix. Axel was emotionally dependent on him. Saix thought Axel didn’t need him anymore, but that simply wasn’t true. He did. It’s obvious to me that the ‘Winner’ stick was meaningful to Axel due to his relationship with Isa more than anyone. That stick was a symbol of Lea’s tears. Yet…it was never even mentioned in KH3. Saix only briefly glanced at it just before he mentioned that Axel’s tear marks were gone. The rest is left to your imagination.

“Oh, c’mon, it’s not that funny!” Axel scolded.

They paused, looked at each other, and giggled again.

“I don’t know why I put up with this…”

“But, I mean…it just didn’t sound like you, Axel.” Xion could barely hold in laughter long enough to get the words out.

A wish that they could always be together—was longing for the impossible. But at least they could always remember one another.

I think it was hinting that Isa originally given him that stick. It was probably so Lea would always remember him, even when he was gone. Lea cried that day. A LOT. Just like Roxas finally shed tears when Xion was gone, leaving behind nothing but the shell. Lea’s feelings for Isa were as powerful as Roxas’s feelings for Xion.

Axel became numb by the time he became a Nobody. Then he started to grow a heart again. That’s what his entire arc in Days was about. These extremely powerful feelings for Isa got totally ignored in KH3, though. Changing Lea’s arc with Isa robbed him of all his emotional depth. It really, truly did. It hurt his character SO much. Lea had nobody to be vulnerable with. Most people could tell Axel/Lea was handled poorly in KH3, even if they weren’t not sure what exactly was missing.

I chose to disappear because I did not want to become what Xemnas had planned for me. Therefore, I had no regrets. I remember disappearing in front of the clock tower while Roxas held me. Roxas also went to sleep afterwards, leaving Axel alone. The person who probably suffered the most was Axel. Because he’s the one who forgot the most. Being forgotten and forgetting, they’re both painful.

What was missing was genuine emotion and vulnerability. Lea’s resolution in KH3 needed to be emotional. WAAAAY more emotional than a quick hug with Roxas and Xion, then going back to being comic relief and breaking the fourth wall. He needed to bawl his eyes out. Even in Xion’s Character File, she said he had more pain than her or Roxas. He needed to finally drop his cool big brother exterior and show his pain. Isa needed to be the one to comfort the “crybaby” and let him know he never forgot about him.

Lea needed a lot more from Isa than just him grudgingly admitting he was jealous and dismissively telling him to stop crying. Lea needed a shoulder to cry on. Someone he could show his weakness to. That’s something Roxas and Xion could not offer him. Without that, his character did not really grow in KH3. He remained the same as he was in Days. Static.

I think the whole idea of Lea’s character was changed because it was too “gay”. Square/Disney we’re afraid of a character like Lea. A male character with a powerful emotional arc revolving around the tears he shed for another man. The story of Axel tear drops got dropped like a hot potato in favor of some stupid retcon with Skuld. If Axel had been female, nobody would care about the subplot with Subject X. Everyone would have been clamoring for more details about how and why she got her tear marks.

#akusai #leaisa #kh lea #kh axel

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true-intha-blu · 6 years ago

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I propose this simple Question

First: why I ask this. Since the infancy of the KH fandom all the way back from KH1, I noticed this simple trend one that picked up tremulously after kh2. No this has nothing to do with shipping. Also to note; I have genuine curiosity if anyone else notices this and this is from my perspective and experience with dealing with the Kingdom hearts fandom. Others may have very different accounts but others (that I have asked) have indeed noticed this as well in my own view. I am not aiming to stir up hate or discourse. I aim for peaceful fandoms. However, this subject is something I see no one ever addresses and well... maybe breaking a status quo or ‘unspoken rule’. I hope this can be a reasonable discussion where I can learn another perspective or some people may notice it and just go... “Oh yeah. That is a thing.” To which the question at hand. “Why does R*ku always have to be cool?”

(Disclaimer I do not hate this character. This question is not hateful. It is not anti or whatever. I mean exactly what I say. I will not be tagging this in the R*ku tab to prevent any misunderstandings. I ask others do the same. Anyone who reblogs this with hate is in no way associated with me.)

I will state the positive traits about R*ku. He has had the greatest character arc out of all the Kingdom Hearts Characters. A great redemption arc from his lowest to blooming into practically a whole new person in his own struggle against his KH1 self. He’s loyal to his friends. Smart. Gets along with Mickey and Yen Sid. Mellow. Saved Kairi and Sora. Knows what he has done. He’s honest and shares his concerns with others. Since KH2 he has always been trying to help Sora in the best of his ability. In acknowledgment of his misdeeds in CoM and Days is very good and we see a character who has genuinely f’d-up and his trying his best to move past that by helping his friends despite the limited resources offered to him. ^These are very good traits for a character to have. Any character. Besides his one time self in KH1, what else is there to him? What can be addressed as a flaw or criticism of him? (I approach characters as even though a character goes through a development arc, does not mean they are void of flaws. No one works like that. Not characters or actual people.) I say this. I love Sora and Vanitas in the Kingdom Hearts fandom. However, I am not afraid to draw them doing stupid or silly things and point out they have various of unfavorable flaws. Sora is utterly dense and I hate the fact how he was portrayed in DDD but I accept it and I will drag him along pointing out that fact. It is part of his character. He’s a dork (and not always in a good way). He impulsive and is kinda a mess of a human being. He's stubborn in the worse ways and volatile. Vanitas appears to be on the surface a straight up evil villain. As far as the games go, he is just utterly vile in his contempt for the characters and his actions have brought suffering and misery to various of characters. (though there may be other traits that could set for his own arc) (I still love them both) But note how none of these flaws listed above are ‘endearing’ or even remotely positive. They are problems, that hinder the characters and those around them. These are persistent traits even though both Sora and Vanitas have mellowed. Sora far more than Vanitas. I just do not see this done with R*ku. I rarely (they do exist but in comparison to the likes of Sora, Org XIII, even foretellers, or Roxas [who could be compared to be as “badass” as R*ku], its rarely ever there) I don’t see anyone talking about Riku doing dumb stuff. Being silly or being the butt of a joke or just not, not being good. Example of the latter: When there was talk about Sora cooking in KH3, rarely did I see that, ‘oh, Sora learns how to cook and becomes very good at it’ and most I see ‘R*ku is already a fabulous cook’.... what about Kairi? What about even Lea? Aqua? There is no mention of these other characters being good at cooking. R*ku is usually A.) always the cooler looking one, or must be made to look cooler and B.) always be the better or best at something. I know that is kinda the thing in KH, that R*ku is talented and gifted as a person. As for the coolness factor, Nomura does this as well. Sora gets a keyblade, R*ku gets an edgier cooler keyblade with more details. Riku gets the powers of both light and darkness. R*ku gets the Keyblade Master title. R*ku gets actual growth in his body. He gets the more competent companion (Mickey). I am not saying these things are detractions or upsetting, they are just there and be defacto, cooler than other characters. He becoming edgier and emo was a good play on Normura because back in early 2005′s people thought that was cool and hot. Silver hair is automatically an attractive trait and western audiences love a person with a muscled body like R*ku’s. I don’t blame fans for being appealed to his character. But I suppose I am getting off-topic. Why do fans keep feeling compelled to make R*ku perfect? When people make fanart of him like say a monster form or pirate outfit, they always make it more detailed, edgier or just cooler than anyone else who would be drawn that way. He always looks more impressive than an original canonical design when other characters are drawn or written in ways that are not as impressive or equally the same to a canonical design/form/power. Has the cool wolf animal companion or the cooler weapon, the more detailed designs etc etc Even Axel who is a badass assassin can be silly or dumb-looking. Heck, they even did that in games. They made Axel failed and acknowledge it. I see Aqua who is awesome in design and badass moments, be criticized for her flaws that persist and others who wish to see her have more moments of weakness even with what we have seen in 0.2 Xion who has had a great arc in Days (Character arcs don’t always have to be a positive development) doesn’t get the coolness factor. Roxas who is probably the second most popular character still is known as a goofy boy who thought he could fight heartless off with a stick. That’s hilarious. The most notable thing about R*ku recently that wasn’t cool or badass or edgy was his infamous “WHAT?” response to Mickey in Kh3. And that was one thing. Only really that. But how Mickey worded it, anyone would have done the same. And I noticed that people use what Mickey said “Aqua is like Sora’ is a way to poke fun at Sora by implying that Aqua is like a dense 15 year old. (Again these are just observations I have made over a decade worth watching the Kh fandom). In talks with other people who are Sora stans or other stans, there is nothing but a lot of talk about R*ku being really good about things. Being superior to Sora, or Kairi, or Aqua and Terra. Over Roxas. Giving Axel two keyblades is never done, but people have given two to R*ku. I get it, people who love characters like to do so much with them. I do the same. I just... never seem to regard the characters I love as perfect as others see R*ku. Also... I just don't see anyone criticizing him (I mean criticism in actual acknowledgment of his character and not hating on said character). Or taking about traits or flaws that are not endearing “He cares too much about his friends” is not really that bad of a flaw in consideration. A lot of people would prefer to have that over say... anger issues. What about the fact he falls back into following the orders of others or doesn’t often decide things for himself?... What about Minor flaws? I just never see them in regards to these characters. Alright, so these are my observations I have made over... 14+ years of watching this fandom. And I want to ask, why do fans see him as such? Besides the only reason being for them is “I like him.” Has it just become such a normal thing to make R*ku better? Is he really that good of a character than he is so universally loved? Or is the backlash of actually criticizing R*ku and seeing that maybe, making him too perfect is... not doing favors for him? An arc is just that, an arc. Doesn’t mean a character is perfect or done with. Doesn’t mean those flaws that persisted in him, are gone. Make your favorite character silly, or doing something very dumb (that does not even have to do with shipping), or put forth of what you would like to see improve in this character or express more about their flaws and their struggles. I love pointing out the negative traits in all my characters because I like seeing their struggle and how that makes them interact with new nuances in other characters. Maybe it's a running joke that R*ku is ‘Mr Perfect’ in the Kh fandom and I am just not seeing it. But it's daunting and just kinda rubs me the wrong way that all these characters in Kingdom Hearts have so many nuances to them and the one who has the best character arc so far in KH is regarded as... ‘Perfect’ I would like to know your opinion and if anyone else who is not a R*ku stan notice this, or is it just me and my own personal bias? (anything said above is in no way should ever be used to promote hate against R*ku or even bash him. In no way, I want to make others hate R*ku. I do not blame people who love this character to portray him in a superior way over everyone else. My address is that I just see this all the time. And I was wondering... why is it so widespread? Not even Axel who has a great redemption arc gets this.) (also another things is the whole sexgod R*ku that is also about however that may go into shipping and that I will not poke a stick at)

#kingdom hearts #character development #just a question #i wish to hear opinions #no bashing #no character hate #fuck antis #fuck character bashing #be mature people #positive and supportive enviroment

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system-of-a-feather · 4 years ago

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I saw a post in the tags about exotrauma, and so I wanted to write some thoughts about it from our experience. So without further ado, on the topic of exotrauma...

(DISCLAIMER: THIS IS BASED ON OUR PERSONAL EXPERIENCE)

Firstly, we discredit the concept of exotrauma in relation to otherkin, fictionkin, and spiritual shit. If you had trauma in a “past life”, whether your beliefs are real or not, they do not stand to THIS life trauma, are not comparable and do not give you a pass to speak over people that have experienced in first hand in this life. You also can not form a system due to exotrauma. Exotrauma =/= Trauma. In every case, exotrauma should never be compared to or used to talk over people who have actual lived - in this world, this life - trauma. If you do so, you are a fucking asshole and really being a huge fucking dick. If the body hasn’t lived through the trauma *personally* you have no right to act as though you know what it is like because your brain generated memories and filled in the gaps. Inherently your understanding of that abuse, if you haven’t gone through it, will be wrong and built off of common knowledge from media, websites and information you read online, and stereotypes, none of which are anywhere good enough of a depiction of what it is actually like.

Also on the point of exotrauma, I / we personally hate the term when used for systems. There is no “external trauma” or trauma from “somewhere else.” It is a term very heavily associated and seen in fictionkin / otherkin communities and “faith” or “spirituality” based things rather than a function of DID. We aren’t going to say people who use it in a genuine way as their preferred term is wrong, but we personally really dislike it.

With all that being said, I will be moving forward using the terms I prefer for the topic, which are psuedomemories and substitute beliefs. Psuedomemories can include stuff that feel very real as past experiences and they can include things that the brain perceives as traumatic.

Having psuedomemories that carry “trauma” that the body didn’t live through or - more often than not - that carry trauma that the body did live through, but warped and/or repainted to make it easier to cope with, digest, understand, or conceptualize are real and they can greatly affect the part that has it.

It’s been on my mind a lot since I’m a part that has “trauma” from “events that didn’t happen” that are very real in my memory and as far as shit goes for processing it, it is very similar to how our *real* and genuine lived trauma is processed. Mine is a very light repaint of what the body went through, but how I perceive it is absolutely disconnected from our real life and it is my experience and unique to me. Other parts hold the same trauma, but they hold the “original” and “real” version.

Still, the aspects of what I went through in my psuedomemories fuck me over regularly. Innately, my feelings towards them and my actual trauma response is coming from what the body went through, and the emotions that we had when we went through it, and it is internalized and redirected to what I now experience. This is why I will still have flashbacks and panic responses to my “psuedomemory” shit because my false memories have substituted and rewritten over our experiences without changing the feelings with it.

Similarly, the other part in our system that has both psuedomemories and trauma-related emotional responses to it is similar. With that being said, they have not lived through everything that the brain has repurposed to be their false memories. Some of the trauma they lived through in their psuedomemories did not happen to this body. As a result, they will not act as if they actually know what it is like in the real world or try to talk over people. It would be very fucked up for them to act as if they know the horrors genuinely in first hand experience, because they do not. Their feelings and emotions about them are still valid and genuine because it is internalized from trauma that is similar and how that trauma was experienced, but they do not have the right to talk publicly about the altered / substituted version of their trauma because that would be overstepping what is okay and what is not.

Additionally, Riku, the host, has psuedomemories from their source, though despite there being many things that should have theoretically been “traumatic” (considering they come from a high combat source), they don’t have any psuedomemories that are perceived as traumatic. That also happens and exists.

Not all psuedomemories are traumatic, not all traumatic psuedomemories cause trauma responses, but some psuedomemories can still elicit trauma responses, and with the nature of psuedomemories, they feel very real and personal - even if they had “never really happened.”

Also, as I said in another post, psuedomemories, substitute beliefs, and “exotrauma” aren’t exclusive to introjects. Riku and the other part mentioned in this are fictional introjects; I on the other hand am just alter, and not an introject of any form.

Substitute beliefs and psuedomemories happen and it isn’t abnormal that when they happen to have emotions that were found in real life experiences the body went through to be attached to them, especially if the psuedomemories and substitute beliefs closely resemble what *actually* happened to the body.

-Ray (Gatekeeper)

#actuallydid #dissociative identity disorder #discourse #syscourse #psuedomemories #fictive #factive #fictional introject #intorject #substitute beliefs #exotrauma

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kingdomhearts-and-soriku-trash · 6 years ago

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oh no plz don't feel bad! Ok, you like writing about them being kids right? how about Sora takes Riku to a world with snow after learning Riku hasn't seen snow yet? (ps, would you feel better if i wrote you something?)

I feel better now bc I can write that!!! And I’m sorry I was being a little over dramatic bc I do that when I feel bad fjwnnehw. But yes I can write that and you don’t have to write me something but if you do please tag me in it!

Okay now enjoy some Soriku. Or well Riku loving Sora. Sorta. He’s just. Complimenting him in his mind bc he’s an awkward boi like that.

Also I couldn’t remember what they called it when they go to see Santa so I just called it Christmas town...unless it was actually called Christmas Town idk djwnwb.

Also, last time I interrupt, I wanted it to be like at Santa’s house but I didn’t know how to include it so the couch is in his house (???).

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As an islander, you never really got to see any snow. Or any in that case. Because of that, Riku never got to see any snow.

Well Sora had other plans. Whether he liked it or not.

“Sora, why are we in Halloween Town?” Sora had dragged Riku out of bed at 10 AM in the morning for this. Riku could’ve said no and Sora would listen, but Riku couldn’t say no to those puppy eyes he always gave. Sora dragged Riku by the hand even faster. “We have to go through Halloween Town to take you to the surprise!”

Sora had mentioned a “surprise” to Riku while he was getting dressed. Riku liked surprises sometimes, and sometimes he could guess them. However, Soras surprised were crazy, so he had a hard time guessing what they were. Especially, when you’re in Halloween town surrounded by a bunch of weird creatures and people. They soon had arrived to a tree with a door shaped like a Christmas tree. Was he taking them to Christmas town? Riku couldn’t remember the last time they celebrated Christmas. It’d be so long before they ever had a moments rest.

Sora opened the door and bowed with a hand gesturing to the open door. “After you.” Riku let out a little laugh. Sora was always extra and was adorable. Even if he wouldn’t tell him. Riku stepped in and then grabbed Sora all of a sudden. “Woah!” Riku laughed as they both ended up falling into snow. Riku looked around in surprise. “What is this?” He asked. Sora laughed and pulled him to his feet. “It’s snow!” Riku saw how excited Sora was and it warmed his heart, even if he was freezing from being in snow.

He’d never really seen snow, he’s heard of it, but never seen it. Sora was practically rolling in it and looked so cold, but he didn’t seem to mind. Riku laughed and felt a bit embarrassed as he look at his best friend with new feelings he just realized. However, he didn’t care at this point. He’d tell him one day. But right now, he was just going to enjoy his time with Sora. “How about we build a snowman?” Riku suddenly was brought back to the real world as Sora was in front of his face, looking at him with such excitement.

Riku didn’t really know how to do that, so he just agreed. He sat there dumbfounded as Sora explained everything to him. Everyone thought Riku was smarter than Sora and thought he was better than Sora, but Riku felt that they were wrong. Sora was the smartest guy he knew.

Even if he didn’t use all of his brain cells sometimes.

At the end of the day, he and Sora had gone inside somewhere and both got hot chocolate. Riku never really had good days. They’ve both been through a lot and never had time to just relax with each other. He looked towards Sora as he layed down enjoying his hot chocolate. “Thank you, Sora.” Sora looked up at him in surprise but happiness. “Was it fun today? I really wanted you to have a good time. We don’t have as much time together as we used too,” he said with a sadness in his tone.

He was right and Riku hated it. Riku and Sora grew up together and were rarely separated. So, now being far away from each other, even spending a YEAR away from each other, hurt both of them. However, he did admit that he had an awesome day. “It was an amazing day, Sora. Thank you for today,” he said with a genuine smile. Sora couldn’t help but rub the back of his neck with a little blush and smile on his face. Riku rarely smiled, so him making him smile was an amazing accomplishment to him. “I had a good day too!”

Riku and Sora finished their hot chocolates and ended up falling asleep on a couch. Sora fell asleep first and Riku remembered how they always held hands as children. It didn’t feel weird. It never felt bad. When had that changed? He didn’t know. He decided to be brave and grabbed Soras hand while he wa sleeping. He was almost asleep when he felt Sora squeeze his hand a little bit tighter.

Sora apparently seemed to miss the feeling of Rikus hand. They both fell asleep and they both somehow ended up hugging each other in their sleep. They don’t mention it because they’re 2 awkward bois but they know they both enjoyed it.

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AAaAaAaaaAaH. I loved this! I hope you enjoyed it as well! I wrote them as not an established relationship but they still loved each other. Plus, I didn’t know how to like make them as children so I’m sorry if that didn’t exactly meet your demands but I hope you still enjoyed this and I hope you come back soon to me❤️💖💗❤️. Plus, thank you for being patient with me because I sometimes just suck at writing.

#kh #kingdom hearts #riku x sora #sora x riku #soriku #my writing

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talinexa · 6 years ago

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Little One - One Shot

So... there are quite a few memes about KH3 Riku looking like Noctis... and I don’t entirely disagree so I really couldn’t help myself.

Riku left Insomnia for Destiny Islands when he was still young. He didn’t remember Insomnia well. Some days he couldn’t remember it at all. Regis and the queen knew, after finding out that their eldest, Noctis, was the Crystal’s Chosen King, that they had to protect their youngest from the dangers that would surround Eos. Noctis being the Chosen meant the Starscourge was coming to its peak.

It was the only secret Riku never told his friends when he was little. The one secret his biological parents made him promise to keep. Sora and Kairi knew Riku wasn’t born on the islands, but unlike Kairi, Riku had been there long enough that Sora couldn’t remember when Riku first arrived.

Riku hated Destiny Islands. He knew he’d been sent away from Eos to keep him safe, but he felt trapped. He desperately wanted to escape.

Not necessarily return to Insomnia---just get off the islands. Be free. Travel and explore. See more than the same ocean and the same group of people.

He loved his adoptive parents, but the isolation of the island was getting on his nerves.

It took Riku many adventures to want to go back to the islands. To seek something familiar.

He was eighteen, with a Keyblade in his hand, the first time he thought about both Destiny Islands and Insomnia as home. He hadn’t been to Insomnia since he was almost too small to remember, and knew he likely would never consider it a real home, but he wanted to see it again.

More as a... learning opportunity. Just to see it again. To get familiar. To see where he came from and understand why it was so important for him to leave.

He sighed and sat on the ground. His Keyblade dissolved into light.

“What’s wrong, Riku?” Mickey asked.

“I haven’t seen my birthplace in... fifteen years? Fourteen? A long time,” he said. “I barely remember it. I have an older brother I barely remember. Noct... he and I were... total opposites.” Riku chuckled. “My adoptive parents on the islands told me he was more like Sora---a bit of a slacker. I’m... more... driven. I guess.” He folded his legs and leaned his elbows on his knees. “I want to go back. To see the place. To meet my brother again.” He closed his eyes. “I used to write, you know. I would send letters to my brother and my biological parents. I used to get letters back. Then... one day when I was still pretty young... they stopped.”

“Riku... I don’t see why you couldn’t go back. For a little while. We all need to follow our hearts,” Mickey remarked.

“You’re right, Your Majesty. As usual.” Riku smiled sadly and shoved his fingers through his silver-white hair. “We just... never seem to slow down long enough for me to have time.”

“You could try now. We have some time.”

Riku looked to the horizon, where the moon was setting. It distorted slightly, appearing larger, as it neared the edge of the world. “Yeah. Yeah I think I will. Thanks Mickey.”

The king nodded.

Riku hit the ground hard with an, “Oof!” as the robot struck him down.

He heard a cry and then saw a streak of blue light. There was a loud Clang! and the shrieking of metal-on-metal and the robot crumpled. Riku coughed to get his breath back and sat up gingerly.

“Y’alright, kid?” a voice asked.

A young man, not much older than Riku himself, was holding a hand out to offer Riku help in standing. Riku took the young man’s offer and let him help him to his feet. The newcomer wasn’t particularly tall---but then again neither was Riku---and had spiky black hair. There was a genuine grin on his face. Riku’s mouth fell open.

“N... Noct?” he asked.

The young man took a step back, his own jaw dropping. “R... Riku?”

In moments, smiles broke out on both of their faces and they were pulling each other in for a hug. Riku felt tears brimming in his eyes, and felt something fall to the shoulder of his shirt. “I can’t believe it’s you,” he whispered, clinging to Noctis tightly. He remembered Noct better than the rest.

As far as he could recall, they’d been close.

“It’s me, Little One. It’s me,” Noctis replied. “I thought I’d never see you again!”

“Me too.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I came to... to see Insomnia again. Eos. I don’t... remember it nearly as well as I should,” Riku said.

Noctis sighed and let Riku go. “Come with me,” he said.

They started to hike across the field. Riku watched his older brother carefully. “You inherited Dad’s bad knee,” he observed.

Noctis started laughing. He slowed his pace and turned. “Oh, Little One, you probably will too. A bad knee is hereditary on the Lucis Caelum side.”

Lucis Caelum. It had been a long time since Riku heard that name.

“I hope not,” he said. “And stop calling me Little One! I’m taller than you!”

“By like four centimeters,” Noctis retorted with a smile.

Riku smirked. “Still taller.”

Noctis snorted---then went quiet. “Mom and Dad used to call you Little One,” he said. His voice was soft and sad.

“Noct... what happened?”

“C’mon. Let’s get back to the others and we’ll explain. Ignis... he’ll tell it better than I can.”

Riku blinked. “I vaguely remember Ignis,” he said.

“You’ll remember more when he starts talking,” Noctis joked somberly. Riku couldn’t help but smile to himself.

“Who are the others? The ones other than Ignis.”

“Prompto and Gladiolus. You never met Prompto. And Gladio... no you never met him either.” Noctis shook his head. “C’mon. Just over this hill.” They started a shallow climb. “And, for the record, my limp isn’t that bad yet.”

“No,” Riku agreed. “It’s barely noticeable. But I knew to look.”

At the crest of the hill, Riku caught sight of a tent up ahead. Three young men were bustling around it. Two taller ones and one shorter.

Noctis jogged down the hill. Riku followed.

“Guys! Look who’s back!” Noctis shouted.

Ignis dropped the pot he was holding. Thankfully it was empty. “Your... Your Highness?”

Riku couldn’t remember ever being addressed that way and it took him aback. “Huh?” he asked eloquently.

Ignis gave him a bow. “Welcome back, Prince Riku.”

“Please don’t.” Riku shook his head, uncomfortable with the formality.

“WAIT! This is your brother, Noct?!” the shortest of the four demanded---he had slightly-spiky yellow-blond hair and lots of freckles.

Noctis chuckled. “Yup. Prompto, this is Riku. Riku, this is my best school friend, Prompto Argentum.”

Riku found his hand being shook aggressively by Prompto. “Such a pleasure to finally meet you. Noct talks about you a lot! You two didn’t have enough time together.” Prompto kept rambling, shaking Riku’s hand for a lot longer than necessary. Riku glanced at Noctis, silently pleading to be saved.

Noctis smirked. “That’s enough, Prompto. You’re overwhelming him.”

Prompto immediately let go. “Whoops. Sorry.”

Riku shrugged. “It’s fine. It’s just... this is a lot to take in.”

“I know---Noct having friends? What gives?” the tallest of the four---who was absolutely towering with bulky muscles---joked.

“Shut up, Gladio,” Noctis retorted.

Riku laughed. Then sombered up. “So... what’s with the camping?”

Ignis sighed and pushed his glasses up his nose. When they were younger, four years older seemed like a huge gap. Ignis had always seemed so grown-up and mature. But now that they were older, the gap between 18 and 22 seemed a lot smaller---and Ignis looked too young to be as worn-down with heavy burdens as he was. “That... is a long story. Have a seat, Your Highness. We’ll explain to the best of our abilities over some dinner,” he said.

Riku squirmed. “Don’t... call me that. Please.” He brushed some loose bangs back into place. “Riku is fine.”

Ignis shrugged and put the pot he’d picked up again onto the camping stove. “Very well,” he said.

Noctis guided Riku to a set of camp chairs and pulled him to sit down. “Before we get to the sob story and the doom-and-gloom, tell me about what’s been happening to you.”

Riku snorted. “A sob story with some doom-and-gloom,” he said. “My best friend is the Chosen One destined to open the door to light to dispel the darkness and put an end to the Heartless and I’m...” He shook his head. “I have too much darkness in my heart. The ‘bad guys’ target me and try to make me one of them but I can’t just... abandon Sora like that. I tried and it... went very badly. For me. I got possessed by an extremely powerful Heartless and nearly killed my best friend and that was just the beginning.”

“I do believe the darkness in your heart is a function of who you are,” Ignis remarked from the stove.

“Huh?”

“You’re a Lucis Caelum,” Noctis put in.

“Right...”

“The power of the Lucis Caelum family has long been considered ‘black magic,’” Ignis said. “Apart from their ongoing attempts to rid the lands of the Starscourge and protect the Crystal, many of your ancestors could be considered... as you said... ‘bad guys.’” He paused in thought. “Though, I’d rather not consider Niflheim ‘good guys.’ Conquering the countries around them and attempting to take control of the world is hardly a move made out of kindness. But rather, greed.”

“So you’re saying I have so much darkness in my heart because I’m a Caelum?” Riku asked.

“It’s very possible,” Ignis said. “Difficult to know for certain when we’re not sure how darkness functions in the lands you grew up in, but possible.”

Riku sighed and set a hand over his heart. “I see,” he muttered. “So I’ll never conquer it?”

“That’s unclear,” Ignis said. “I’m unfamiliar with how darkness works for you. I could very well be incorrect on multiple accounts. And given my unfamiliarity, I assume I am incorrect. Perhaps the darkness I know and the darkness you know are different forces, Prince Riku. I see the ‘black magic’ of the Lucis Caelum line as being considered ‘darkness.’ However that brand of magic doesn’t exclude the notion that its wielder is incredibly kind and caring. Merely a label attached to a certain set of powers. The Nox Fleuret family magic is considered ‘white magic’ due to its incredible restorative properties. Healing. Whereas the Lucis Caelum power is more... destructive. Take everything I say with a grain of salt. The darkness you know could likely be quite simple for you to conquer, however neither you nor I are aware of how.”

Riku fiddled with one of the buckles on one of the belts around his leg. “Thanks Ignis,” he mumbled.

Ignis pushed his glasses up his nose. “Of course.”

“Wow. Insomnia fell... just like that?” Riku asked.

“Make no mistake, we weren’t there,” Ignis said. “I’m certain there was more to it than what we’ve told you.”

“It definitely had to have been more complicated than that,” Prompto agreed.

“So... there’s no chance of me seeing Dad again,” Riku said. “Or Mom.”

“Mom died when we were still really young. Not long after you left,” Noctis said. “I was about... seven or eight. Meaning you would have been five or six.”

“Explains why the letters stopped,” Riku remarked.

Noctis rubbed the back of his head. “Sorry, Riku. I never meant to stop writing. It was just... when Mom died... Dad got more distant and I...”

“Hey man, I get it. I’m just glad to know the reason why the letters stopped,” Riku said. “Hey Ignis, can I help you clean up dinner?”

“I would appreciate the assistance, yes,” Ignis said.

Riku helped Ignis gather up everyone’s plates and silverware and took it over to the cooking station. While they started washing dishes, Riku sighed. “Ignis?” he asked quietly. Prompto and Noctis were shouting about a game Riku didn’t know anything about, drowning out him and Ignis to the other three.

“Yes, Your High---Riku?”

“How’s everything really been while I’ve been gone?” He rubbed the back of his head. “How’s... how’s Noct been?”

“He’s been handling it as best he can,” Ignis said. “It’s not his fault his father and his home were taken from him. Your arrival could not have been more opportune. Nor could it have been any more ill-timed.”

“Meaning?”

“You’ve lifted his spirits but it’s dangerous here.”

“Ignis, I’ve been fighting darkness and monsters since I was fifteen now. I can handle myself.”

“I never said you couldn’t,” Ignis said in his peculiar accent. “I just mean your parents sent you away to keep you safe from the dangers of Eos until your brother completed his destiny. That hasn’t happened yet and the dangers are coming to a head. If your parents knew you’d returned now, they would be extremely cross. I suggest you return later in order to ensure your safety. After Noct has completed the Crystal’s mission and fulfilled his destiny.”

“Fulfilled his destiny...” Riku muttered. He shook his head. “My big brother. Then my best friend. Looks like I’m always the one that destiny skips over in favor of someone else.”

“That’s not necessarily a bad thing, don’t you agree? You are free to make whatever life you want.”

“I don’t think I should be trusted to make decisions like that. When I made the life I thought I wanted I ended up giving in to the darkness in my heart and getting possessed by an evil Heartless.”

Ignis sighed. “No one makes good decisions in their teen years.”

“Even you?” Riku teased. “You seem... really responsible and mature.”

Ignis laughed. “Even me,” he said. “There’s a lot you don’t know about me. Even Noct doesn’t know about my rebellious activities.”

Riku laughed. “You’ll have to tell me about those sometime.”

“I will.”

“Hey Riku! You gotta take a ride with us in the Regalia in the morning! You’ll love it!” Noctis shouted.

“Sure thing!” Riku smiled over his shoulder. He vaguely remembered the Regalia—just like everything else about his earliest memories in Eos, all he really had for certain was a glimmer of an idea. A sleek black vehicle that was graceful and should never ever be driven by Riku.

He’d been so busy learning how to use a keyblade and fighting darkness and Organization XIII that he’d never learned how to drive. Even Sora knew how to fly a Gummiship but Riku never really had the chance.

And for a while he hadn’t had the need. When he’d given in to the darkness for the second time in order to defeat and subdue Roxas, taking on Ansem’s appearance again, he could open dark Corridors and use them to travel. But since then... he still hadn’t found the chance.

But he was looking forward to riding in the Regalia as a passenger.

He glanced at Ignis. “I’ll head home after taking a ride,” he said quietly.

Ignis nodded. “Of course, Your Hi---Riku.”

“You’ll get it eventually,” Riku remarked. “I’m glad I got to meet you guys again.”

“As am I,” Ignis agreed. “Perhaps at some point the four of us could come meet this best friend of yours.”

Riku thought of how strange his life might seem to any on the outside. He couldn’t remember talking, magic ducks in Eos. He knew Eos was beyond the reach of the Heartless. They had their own problems.

But he also knew they would all love Sora. How could they not? Sora was just one of those lovable people.

He smiled and nodded. “Yeah. Yeah maybe.”

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nobodies-png · 6 years ago

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Christmas anon here! aw yeah, time to be Very Merry. Could I please see some hcs about modern (i love the fact that you're open to modern asks, btw!) roxas, vanitas, and kairi skyping their s/o (who traveled to see family) on christmas morning? maybe each opening a gift the other gave them, even though there far away from each other (this idea got away from me yikes) thank you so much, merry christmas!!

hell yEAH for this christmas spirit ! Modern AU isn’t the only thing I can do so feel free to just go w i l d with these AUs

I had so much fun writing this ? ? ? w o a h

Roxas :

Roxas would be a little bit late to the Skype session because he’s just. Horrible with timezones and he might’ve overslept a bit - cough. He’d probably stay in his bed as a blanket burrito while Skyping. After apologizing for over a thousand times, he’d make some polite small talk : asking how are you, if you had breakfast or lunch yet, what were you up to… Anything to avoid letting his excitement show. The boy tries so hard to be seen as mature and cool around you, it’s adorable.

His façade drops as soon as you wave around the little gift he got you for Christmas, which managed to arrive just in time, safe and sound ! Roxas would immediately get defensive and explain that he’s just horrible at picking things for others. Like he’s managed to convince himself that you’re gonna hate his gift and he’s just unable to stop rambling now. Okay, tiger, calm down.

You’re just gonna have to shush him and open the package so he can stop whining. Surprise ! It’s that one Moai Tissue Box (from the 358/2 manga, yes - for the love of god read it) ! Roxas would go on and explain that Xion and Axel helped him get all the winner ice cream sticks to get this for you - and he would bury his head in the pillows, groaning while you just laugh your ass off. But there’s no malice in your voice, the fact that he actually worked hard to get you this funny gift is just so precious.

Under that there would be a heartfelt letter for you, extremely fucking corny and cheesy - with a thousand other cute things blurred out - about how grateful he is to have you in his life and that he hopes you stay forever ! But he’d beg you to read that once you two stop Skyping just so he doesn’t die from embarrassment.

He’d be a bit pouty while opening your gift, not gonna lie. Maybe stick his tongue out at you once in a while. But he’s lowkey excited to know what’s inside - no matter what you end up giving him, he’s gonna love it and cherish it. The tackiest, ugliest sweater in existence ? No problem, he’ll wear that shit even past February.

Vanitas :

This guy is shitty enough to be late for the Skyping session on purpose, just so he can pull the “AW DID YOU MISS MEEEEEEE ?” stunt on you. Truth be told, he’s just horrible with electronics and couldn’t figure out how Skype works. Password ? What the fuck was his password ? ? But he’ll obviously never tell you about that so - heEEY DID YOU MISS HIM ? Wait. What do you mean yes. Oh no. Genuine love and signs of affection, his w e a k n e s s. Please, stop before you melt his dark persona away.

He’d sulk and get flustered, but he’d hide that pretty well by getting a head start in opening the gift you got fro him. Vanitas would be all smug, saying shit like “I’m surprised I got a gift, considering i’m always on Santa’s naughty list” and other things that will just make you facepalm to hell and back. You’d be begging for him to shut up and open the box already.

And oh b o y, his expression would be priceless. You just see a rush of emotions cross his face : from shocked, to happy, to flattered, to maybe a bit of fear, biting his lip before finally setting on b i t t e r. The gift is probably something so meaningful and wholesome that Vanitas would need a few moments to process what the fuck is happening in his brain. Before you can even ask what’s wrong, he’s already pouring his heart out and explaning that he’s just so happy that you got him something so nice. Sad because he probably thinks he doesn’t deserve you and bitter because, well. He got you a stupid gift as a joke.

You’re probably gonna tear up at his confession. He’s definitely gonna tear up. Everyone’s tearing up at this point. You’re used to Vanitas’ complex personality, but seeing him so vulnerable and open is truly a Christmas miracle. You two spend the next few hours comforting each other and sharing sweet nothings. Until you remember that you still have a gift to open !

Vanitas is probably back to his mean self, begging you to just throw that shit away. But it’s too late, pandora’s box has been o p e n e d. And surprise ! It’s a dumb plushie of a Moogle wearing a Christmas sweater that says “Youre Santa’s favorite Ho Ho Hoe !” and some mistletoe on it’s groin. You can decide Vanitas’ punishment and fate for this.

Kairi :

First of all. Kairi doesn’t use Skype, she uses Discord cause she’s not a p e a s a n t - okay, jokes aside, she’s definitely gonna be ready hours before you are, looking hella cute in her Christmas outfit. You’ll wake up to a couple of sweet good morning texts from her, as well as gentle reminders to take your time and have a decent breakfast before getting on a call with her. Reading those always gives you some b u t t e r f l i e s in your stomach.

Unlike Roxas, Kairi cannot control her excitement and as soon as she sees you, she’ll clap excitedly and bounce on her bed, r e a d y to open the gifts. Of course, she’ll remember her manners and make some small talk first. She wants to know everything ! Are you eating well ? How’s your family doing ? Speaking of family, she’s so popular among yours that you can expect your relatives popping up occasionally to greet her. And because she celebrates Christmas with Riku and Sora, those two would also pop up to greet you too - before being kicked out by Kairi herself.

After catching up, she’d insist on opening the gifts at the same time. Kairi has a thing for matching accesories or clothes with her loved ones. So if she hasn’t given you a cute wayfinder charm to match hers, then you can expect one inside the box - resting on top of a thousand other gifts. How she managed to fit all of this inside is a complete mystery.

Kairi always gets carried away when shopping things for her friends because she just sees so many things that they all could like ! So she just. Gets them all. There’s a pair of mittens, a few little trinkets you wanted and some plastic mistletoe with a note attached, it reads “You owe me a kiss when you get back !”. You’ll definitely feel that your gift for her is nothing compared to this, but you’ll feel so much better once you see the way her face lights up while hugging your gift to her chest.

You two would have so much fun just talking for hours, already planning the things you two can to do once you go back. Riku and Sora would probably tag along the call after a while cause they also miss having you around !

#kh headcanons #roxas #vanitas #kairi #anonymous #reader insert

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themattress · 6 years ago

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More bullshit from Mod A in regards to Xion. Mod M is more reasonable (although I question if toxic male fandom does hate anything that reads like fanfiction at first glance...I think that if it reads like the kind of fanfiction they like, then they’ll eagerly accept it. I like to consider myself equal opportunity in this regard: if it reads like any kind of bad fanfic, then I dislike it.)

I’m with @riniuchihaa here. For me, Xion, far from being the best KH character, was the first glaring neon warning sign that the series was going off-course, that an original character was being created for the sake of it despite not being able to impact much of anything given her placement, and then was not ever let go of even though the excuse given as to why she was forgotten by KH2 should have rendered it impossible for her to appear in the series again.

“not a damsel in distress, action girl or sex object”

Is she not those things, though? She has to be rescued or protected several times throughout the game. She wields a Keyblade and can even be better at it than Roxas if she’s absorbed enough of his strength. And there are a lot of creepy guys online that will argue that she is sexy, particularly with KH3′s model of her suggesting that she’s not wearing anything underneath that coat, which is open all the way to just above her chest. By KH3, she’s even taken Namine’s “plot device to make convoluted shit happen” status. If anything, people take issue with her being all of those things, and not even being them as well as other KH girls. She’s very derivative with little to add for herself.

“she’s a regular human being with a regular human emotional arc”

I would actually say that of Xion in the manga.

In the game, I think this is a case of projecting. Xion’s personality and arc are written as such a blank slate, with more people talking about Xion and what she’s going through than her and it being onscreen, that it’s easy to project on to. But when looked at objectively, there isn’t much humanity to it at all.

Ask yourself this: what is Xion like when she’s not around Roxas and Axel, doing missions and eating ice cream? What are her likes and dislikes, her own personal hobbies or aspirations? What are her feelings on matters completely unrelated to her friends? For the life of me, I can’t come up with an answer. The closest I can get is with the text of her Secret Reports, where she honestly shows more character than she actually shows in the game itself (but then, that’s the same with Roxas and his Diary entries.)

Before her identity crisis kicks in, all of Xion’s scenes are shared with Roxas and/or Axel, in the context of missions, ice cream, and being good friends with them, simply going along with whatever they’re doing and saying. Any feelings of inadequacy she feels during periods of time where she’s “malfunctioning” are skimmed over, and again is talked about more by other people than by her. Once her identity crisis happens, any scene she has apart from Axel and Roxas either still works them in somehow (they are consistently her biggest motivations in her own personal conflict, the only reason she’s conflicted about her existence is because of them since they give her a reason to exist) or just focuses on her freaking out about the fact that she’s a replica whose personality was formed based on the fragmented memories of another person that leaked into Xion through that person’s Nobody, which makes her less fit to exist than those who aren’t meant to exist. Yeah, totally a regular human emotional arc right there! Can’t count the number of times in the history of the human species that people have had to go through that!

Kairi in KH and Namine in COM actually felt like human beings with emotional arcs in spite of their extraordinary circumstances. Xion feels more like KH2′s Kairi and Namine, where I get the basic trope behind their personalities and development, but can’t really pin them down as three-dimensional and realistic. That’s Xion - the writing for her is very trope-y, not human. The main points of how she was written were three-fold: as a plot device (a means of getting Roxas from point A to point B), as a wish-fulfillment character (she’s basically Tomoko Kanemaki’s self-insert), and as an exploration of a theme (the “What Measure is a Non-Human?” theme that Kanemaki is obsessed with). The humanity being inferred in regards to her being a trans girl case study was not at all intended to be there, and it can only happen because she was sketched thinly enough for it to be applied to her.

“complains that she’s taking too much space or stealing the spotlight”

I’m sorry, but this is a valid complaint. When it was announced there was going to be a game about Organization XIII set between COM and KH2, everyone was wanting and expecting more development and focus on the members who had already been firmly established, most of whom were in desperate need of such development and focus. So to suddenly have Xion introduced and be the major focus of the game, whether she’s actually on-screen or not, would be very jarring and disappointing.

What’s worse is all the games she pops in after Days, as not only does it destroy the established rules of canon in regards to her fate, but she ultimately steals the spotlight in an even more harmful way in KH3: Kairi, the original KH girl, who had been receiving build-up for YEARS as a Keyblade-wielding Guardian of Light, is literally screwed out of this role in favor of Xion, her Mary Sue copycat whom no-one asked for to begin with and whom many people weren’t keen on having return, as not only did it destroy the main thing she had going for her (her nature as a tragic character) but it robbed Kairi of development and focus that, again, she was in desperate need of. But Xion got over 30 more votes than Kairi in a Japanese popularity poll, so...priorities?

“Xion’s story is about the right to define her own existence, to live as her own true self, etc.”

No, that’s not what Xion’s story was about. It was about her learning that she had no right to her existence because it was actively hurting the existences of others, including her best friends’, and that the right thing to do is to disappear. I take some issue with how it played out (mainly that Xion accepts this way too easily and becomes a “Too Good For This Sinful Earth” type who does the right thing for the sake of her friends even when a more angry, selfish and conflicted Xion would’ve been more engaging and human, and that Riku is OOC in his treatment of her considering his treatment of Roxas), it was still incredibly tragic and it owned that. So for that tragic story to be undone in favor of a “lol, just kidding, Xion can exist and get a happy ending with her friends after all, no tragedy here!” way of appeasing the fans who called foul and raised a stink about it (especially in Japan) will never sit right with me, especially when the writing doesn’t even TRY to justify it. It just happens for the sake of it.

“It has a lot to do with the fact that Xion is a young girl whose story expects us to genuinely empathize with her”

OK, here’s a tip: it is rarely EVER a good idea to expect your audience to all feel a certain way toward something and try to force that reaction. “Death of the Author” is a thing, which is why you’re best not taking sides or playing favorites when making a story, you’re better off putting your personal feelings aside and just letting things play out, allowing people in the audience to make up their own mind. When the story pushes for the audience to genuinely empathize with Xion, with lines by others such as “poor Xion!”, then it’s not surprising that the opposite effect happens: some fans don’t like or empathize with her because they resent the hamfisted attempts at being told that they should.

“That’s like saying Kairi didn’t matter in KH1 because Sora forgot her in COM”

That’s a false equivalence if I ever saw one. KH came out before COM, and Sora didn’t forget her so much as she was replaced by someone else, Namine, in his memory, which drove that story’s conflict. Its resolution was Sora learning the truth and remembering Kairi again. Kairi is still a factor in COM, a very important factor at that. Days came out after KH2, where there isn’t even a hint of Xion, she is not a factor in that game because she wasn’t invented yet. Sure, Xion matters to Days, but that mattering doesn’t feel like it amounts to much when she isn’t seen, heard from or mentioned for the entirety of the game it was leading up to.

“But so what?”

So, it feels incredibly unnatural to have a character jammed into a pre-existing timeframe and pre-existing dynamic prior to KH2, with mass amnesia being used as a plot device to explain away why she wasn’t present in any way in KH2, only for every game taking place after KH2 (and thus after Days was made) to suddenly start featuring Xion again, with the mass amnesia plot device being casually discarded. What’s worse is how canon rules were obliterated so that Xion could return in KH3 and reverse the tragedy element that made her story effective to begin with, at the expense of characters like Kairi who have been around longer than Xion and who desperately needed exposure more than Xion. Seriously, in addition to the point I already raised about Xion taking Kairi’s place, just think about this: characters that were created as a trio, Sora, Riku and Kairi, are no longer a trio, just the duo of Sora and Riku, while characters that were created as a duo, Roxas and Axel, are now a trio thanks to Xion. It feels like a slap in the face to all the fans who liked Kairi and the Destiny Trio, and it’s a big reason as to why Xion’s inclusion in the series feels like a mistake to those fans and thus why she’s such an off-putting character to them.

The only statements made here that I agree with is that Xion sadly wouldn’t have gotten as much hate if she was a badass, older male character, that her being forgotten due to memory magic isn’t really a mark against her since that’s a cheap plot device that happens to a lot of characters in the series, and that you can’t really do the story of 358/2 Days without her since she’s so integral to it...but on that note, the story of 358/2 Days didn’t need to happen. The KH series during its early days was meant to be Sora, Donald and Goofy’s story, so leaving the period of time where they were asleep a blank made perfect sense. We never needed to know about Roxas’ time in the Organization beyond what was said and shown in KH2, and to this day I honestly wish we hadn’t. In game form, anyway. The manga is great, it can stay!

#Disney #Square Enix #Kingdom Hearts #Xion #Opinion #Objection #Correction #Fandumb #Bad Writing #Jumping the Shark #This Franchise Got Screwed Up #Anti-Xion #Anti-Kingdom Hearts

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oveliagirlhaditright · 6 years ago

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A comment I just left on ProdigyXD’s awesome video about Kairi needing her own game:

Thank you so much for this video, Prodigy. To be honest, I didn't watch your other KHIII Kairi video... After KHIII, and all of the hate that Kairi got from fans there... as someone who loves Kairi, I've been very selective of the videos I watch. I just- I've been with this series from the beginning. I went through the horrible Kairi hate years of 2005-2006, and while I dealt with it all there... I just don't want to go through it again at this point in my life. I'm not saying that some of the criticisms people have aren't valid, of course. God, no! I'll be the first knocking down Nomura's door, telling him he honestly hasn't treated Kairi the best and begging him to get better with her. But I just don't want to see art of Sora and Riku murdering Kairi anymore. I don't. I'm not saying it's gotten that bad again (I actually don't know if it has or not. God, I hope not). And I'm not saying that that's what I thought your first video was... but do you maybe get with all of this why I was reluctant to watch your first one, not for sure knowing what kind of video it would be? But, ANYWAY. Seeing the title/screenshot of this video "Why Kairi Needs Her Own Game", I went "Cool. I've wanted that for years. I'll check this out". And I'm so glad I did! What a wonderful thing this is, that really hammers out all the fine points and is fair to both sides. And you going and counting all her hours of screentime in the main games is you going above and beyond the call of duty. Major kudos. Kairi is probably my favorite character of all time, because KH is my favorite series of all time... And that's weird, I know. Since Kairi isn't utilized as well as she could be, you'd think I'd prefer someone else. But I think I was always destined to side with Sora, Riku, or Kairi, since those are the main three we start out with. And I'm someone who always has their heart with the firsts. And Sora (who-from a writing standpoint in I and III-is probably my favorite, but shh) just always seemed... too perfect to me. I don't mean that in a way to slight him or his writing. But that I wanted a character I could somewhat relate to, you know? And I just never thought I could reach the standard of Sora. And Riku... Well, I hated him in the first game so he was out. LOL (I was a nine-year-old who saw the first game in black and white, and despised him for trying to hurt my Disney characters.). And while I've grown to love him now, of course-and think his arc in the series is probably the best-the rule of firsts for me made me prefer Kairi over him (that, and because I just genuinely like more upbeat protagonists). But it isn't just through process of elimination that made Kairi my favorite. Not at all. I've always really loved and respected Kairi for who she is... the things she's done, and her potential. Kairi was actually a role model for me, growing up. Because many forget (or just don't know, if they came into the series later), that Kairi was created when the Disney princesses at the time... weren't the greatest. And in a lot of ways, I saw Kairi as better than them: Just her take charge attitude with the boys as they built the raft... the fact that she wanted to go on this adventure to see other worlds WITH them (in a lot of media back then, the girl would have been left out of that dream)... and how Kairi-even while unable to defend herself, sure-was still selfless and wasn't content to just be saved, but would then want to try and help rescue Sora and Riku... was some powerful stuff back then. And her sass. That might be my FAVORITE Kairi trait (which is why I'm sad it's a bit watered down in KHIII. It's still there, it is, but not nearly as much as it was in KHI and KHII): In a time, where a lot of the Disney princesses could be best described as "nice". Having a character who did things like slapping Sora upside the head and calling him a "lazy bum", saying Sora was "completely hopeless" without her and Riku, insisting that Axel wasn't "being very friendly" when he tries to kidnap her (after he just said he thought he and Kairi were friends already) meant a lot to me (this is also how friends behave with each other, and why I bought the Destiny Trio's friendship more than the Wayfinder Trio's). I also think it shows Kairi isn't perfect, and why I see the arguments that she has no personality or is a Mary-Sue as unfounded. Plus... just the fact that the girl with a heart of pure light is one of the most snarky characters in the series is an amazing dichotomy to me, that a lot could be done with. And don't even get me STARTED on this girl's potential, and all the plot threads that have for some reason been left untied with her (I'm also irritated that it seems like, for example, KHIV is going to deal with experiments done on Skuld in the basement of Radiant Garden's castle. Instead of first doing it with the main girl, Kairi-and filling that story in-when the novels say Apprentice Xehanort experimented on her before throwing her into space. Why can't we see this crap? Why?). I might make another comment with all of her potential and whatnot (because I've had YEARS to think about all of this. Especially when the cast was small, so I then thought more would be done with Kairi). And just the fact that Nomura has yet to really do anything with it... just saddens me to no end. I have my own suspicions about that: I think he has trouble with writing female characters in general, and is even somewhat afraid to. But most of all... I don't think he knows how to write someone who's supposed to have a heart of pure light (not even Ven counts, since he has half a heart). Especially a girl one. So I think he leaves her out for that reason, instead of risk botching her... And I wish he'd just realize that I think he already answered his own question long ago, and to just go on ahead wit it: That just because she has a heart of pure light, doesn't mean she can't feel emotions that can be associated with darkness in this series... but rather, that it just-for whatever reason-won't turn to darkness for her like it would with anyone else. Because we've for sure already seen her and the other Princesses experience despair, anger, ambition, or what have you. But, yeah: It's really sad what's happened with Kairi (just think about the fact that the only worlds Kairi has been to are Destiny Islands, Hollow Bastion, Traverse Town, the End of the World, Twilight Town, The World That Never Was, The Mysterious Tower, Merlin's Time Chamber, an The Keyblade Graveyard, when she started this series wanting to go on a grand world tour, too. Why does only SHE get just the traumatizing worlds, and none really with Disney and Disney fun?). And I hope and pray that Nomura fixes it with IV (or whatever game), by having Kairi feel guilty about everything that's happened with Sora, get stronger, and save Sora (or at least be a key part to it), because as much as I hate to say it... If he doesn't, there may never be any going back for this character:( I don't know why he did what he did to her in III: if it was to subvert expectations (we all thought Kairi's warrior story would finally have its pay-off, so he decided to go against that idea to surprise us? Nomura has said he tries to surprise himself. And I don think one of his faults as a writer, is that he bends over backwards to try and make these crazy twists happen when he should just write the story and have them come naturally), to do a tragic romance (which surely it is. But still... there were other ways. And I don't know if the way this has now damaged Kairi was worth it. Maybe this is why Nomura's been quoted saying he doesn't think he writes romance well...), or what. ...I also will say that Nomura has a problem with fridging female characters that is pretty worrying, and should maybe be addressed: Aerith in FFVII was HIS idea, Luna in Final Fantasy XV was probably him (since she's essentially rewritten Stella. And Stella was his. And oh, how I worry for Verum Rex girl now, for these reasons), Strelitzia, and now Kairi. So, I REALLY hope Nomura didn't just think undermining everything Kairi was worth it to just give Sora man-pain... but I'm worried it was. -sigh- Like I said above... I do hope Nomura has some master plan with this and that it's all going somewhere. And that at the end of the day, this will be the start of a good payoff for Kairi: And in a few years, her KHIII performance won't even be a blip on the radar. We've fallen down so low, we can only go up at this point (and since Kairi has now been killed to be used against Sora, it can never happen again. So that's a plus). But at the same time... I do think it's best that us as a community-kindly, of course-let our voices be heard about this, so hopefully it will get back to Square Enix... and they'll realize we want a Kairi game (or whatever), and will give the fans what they want and make it, and fix some of these issues. And I thank you for, perhaps, starting some of that here:)

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soaringlanddormitory · 6 years ago

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🔎 (Mi and Tatsuya), 🔮 (Riku and Yuriko), 👑 (Michiko and Toshio), 🔪 (Masae and Kuga)

Thank you for sending these in!! I’m going to have fun while writing all of this omg!

Also this got pretty long so I’ll place it on read more!!

🔎 - Detective AU

It heavily irritated the male every time he was called for an interview by the detectives, but what annoyed him most was him suddenly getting arrested and questioned for a crime he didn’t do. Yes, it’s understandable why he was always the suspect. But the process was getting to his nerves. He was currently handcuffed outside a room.

“Please tell me it;s not Detective Kaoru. The last time I saw him, he made me sing a song of the Backstreet Boys.” He hissed at the cop who was currently removing his handcuffs. “If it were him, I’m going to fucking snap.” He may have known Kaoru before he became a criminal, but he was getting very tired of everything.

“It’s not.” The cop who covered his eyes with his hair replied. “It’s someone else. I am not sure if you’ve seen her before.” He opens the door and he gestures for him to get inside. “If you want to see who it is, you should enter the room.”

“Whatever, Ibusaki.” Those were the last words he was able to say before the door was shut behind him. “You’re just going to waste my time interviewing me.” He spat.

“Now that’s not really a nice way to greet your girlfriend, Tatsuya!”

The detective he had to face was his childhood friend, but also his current girlfriend. They dated before he got arrested, and to his surprise they were still together once he went out of jail. “Che. Make it quick. I hate this process.” He went to the chair and sat down.

“Actually, I know you didn’t do it. But people say that it could be you.” She shrugged before she brought out some files. “Since some evidence leans to you. You have a similar knife that you’ve said you lost in the murder case.”

“Okay yeah. It’s not me. I’m not that fucking stupid to leave a weapon. Added to that, I never did the crime and people got the wrong guy.” He began looking at the papers that was set before him. “But of course I can’t talk shit now, at least I’m free and now I have a fucking chance of going back to that hell hole.”

Mi sighed before she brought her hand to his face. “You have to know that you’re one of the reasons why I wanted to do what I’m currently doing. I want to be a better detective so people like you wouldn’t be caught in messes like this. Especially if they didn’t do it.”

Tatsuya suddenly became quiet and a small blush appeared on his face. “You’re fucking stupid, you know that? Trusting me so easily. I could be lying to you and yet you’re treating me like this. Job before love, you brat.”

“Alright then! Let’s do this quick.” She laughed before she placed her hand away. “But of course I trust you. I’m a detective. I can read your gestures. I know you’ve always been telling the truth. Always.”

🔮 - Fantasy AU [Moe belongs to @polar-stars !! Keiko belongs to @polar-star-dorks!!]

Yuriko always disliked that she fell in love with a mage. He was much smarter than her and he was so clever that she could never reach his level. She only fell in love with him after he used magic to protect her while he had to remain damaged. If he didn’t protect her that day, she wouldn’t be feeling this way.

“God, I hate this man so much.” Yuriko leaned on the wall of the guilt and her friend only stared at her. “He’s so ridiculously smart and he will probably end up rejecting a mere fighter like me, I’d rather not feel this way if I already know the outcome! This is so stupid to talk about! Ugh! I’m so sorry, Moe…”

“You can tell me anything even if you think it’s stupid.” The girl who was listening her began talking. “I wouldn’t want you to keep it all in.” Moe sounded blunt but Yuriko was terribly happy to hear that from her.

“Moe, I love you so much. You’re the best.” Yuriko began carrying the female, and she instantly cheered up. “I’m so happy that you’re my friend! Now, we should go to our quest with Keiko and Takashi.”

Moe was currently being carried by Yuriko, but she gave a tiny nod, agreeing with the female. The two went out of the guild and they saw two of their companions squealing.

“Takashi! Did you see that?! They kissed!”

“Yes! I totally saw that!! I wish I had the ability to freeze time!”

Yuriko placed Moe down and it actually confused her on why her two other friends were acting this way. “Wait… who kissed?”

Moe raised her arm and pointed at one direction. “They kissed again.”

Following the direction of Moe’s fingers, she glanced up to see Tamotsu and Himari together and Yuriko twitched slightly just seeing them. If they were together at this moment, that would mean that the person who she was talking about just some minutes ago will probably be here too…

“Yuriko, is that you?”

Fuck. He was there.

Keiko suddenly had her soul going out of her body once again because the day was truly a blessing. First, HibiTori partnered up for a quest, then one of Takashi’s main ships kissed and now one of her NGM pals was having a conversation with her crush.

Moe only watched everything go down. Her expression didn’t change but she did know that her other current members would probably be feeling very happy seeing this. However, her day wouldn’t be completely perfect until she saw one of her OTPs together for who-knows-what reason.

“Riku?” Yuriko felt her heart beat faster but she chose to act completely like herself. “My, my~! I didn’t expect you to be here!” She playfully punched his chest and he grabbed her hand. “Awww! Aren’t you being sweet holding my hand like that?” She began teasing him a bit to hider her current feelings.

“Being sweet? What? No. It’s a little warning because your fist grew tense and it actually did hurt when you punched me.” He sighed but he used his magic to heal herself. “I wanted to tell you something, but I do believe you and your current party is planning to do something important.” He places his hand down before turning around. “Maybe another time.”

“Be sure to tell me soon!” She went forward to slide her finger on his back to surprise him. “You might forget it.”

“… Alright.” Honestly, he wished that he could forget it. “Next time then.”

Forget that he might have gained feelings for her. But she didn’t know that.

👑 - Royalty AU [They were mentioned so!! Suzume and Akio belong to @polar-stars and Tamaki and Yoko belong to @polar-star-dorks!!]

There were several people who were in the princess’ place. There were a bunch of suitors who wanted to win her heart and be the next king of the throne. Honestly, even if people may think she might be dense because of her appearance- they were wrong. She could totally read their intentions, and most of the time, it gave a bitter taste in her mouth.

She never really liked any of her suitors. They all acted so polite and loving, but once they talked… it changed. She felt all the dishonesty in their voice, and knew that they’d never keep their promises to her. Of course, she should have expected that because she’s going to be the next queen. But she actually wanted to feel genuine love from one of her suitors.

“Princess Suzume is lucky she was able to get someone like Prince Akio in her life.” Michiko began talking to herself. “I wonder how she was able to find such a great suitor like Akio… I wish I could get someone like that…” She placed her hands together. “Or maybe marry someone who isn’t in a noble background… Prince Tamaki was able to meet someone so loving. Yoko had a bad reputation but that was proven wrong… Not much expected that but their relationship is so sweet…”

The door suddenly opened and Michiko fixed her posture, and began bring in a fake smile on her face. “Good Evening.” She instantly did a curtsy bow and the person in front of her only began laughing at her reaction. That laugh… it was someone who she wished was one of her suitors… but she’d never say that out loud. “Toshio?!” She lifted her head and spotted a man in armor.

“Yes, princess. It’s me.” Toshio responded but quickly removed his helmet. “It’s your favorite knight. Toshio Nakiri.” She was able to see his ginger hair and his purple eyes and admittedly, those two colors became her favorite because of him. He could have been one of her suitors if it weren’t for him being a knight.

“What brings you here?” She asked. It was not because she was against his visit, but currently it was time for him to do his job. He shouldn’t be talking to her at this time, he should be guarding the gates. “My father might be mad at you if he knew about this… You know how protective he is, and knowing our best knight isn’t doing his job-”

“Don’t need to worry about that, princess. The current guards are great too! We only changed our shifts recently because I requested it!” He went closer to her and began ruffling her hair. “I only wanted to talk to you… because it’s your almost your birthday and I can’t afford to miss it.”

“And that is?”

“Happy Birthday and be careful with whoever you pick, Michiko.” He brings her hand to his lips to give a soft kiss. “Because if it isn’t me, they better treat you right.”

🔪 - Yakuza AU [Canción AKA Emile belongs to @polar-star-dorks and Lotus AKA Hanako belongs to @polar-stars!!]

Kuga placed his hands in his pocket as he walked around the area of the gang of Aroon, Gaia, Canción, Lotus and Sukiru. They were a gang that only consisted of 5 people, but according to several people- they all did their job well despite being at a small number compared to other gangs. Their place looked totally normal and they even acted as if they had nothing to do with a gang.

Canción was currently playing with a guitar and Aroon was swooning over the music he was playing. “You’re doing great, Guitar Hero! Damn you’re so great at this!” He leaned at the couch before gesturing for other people to come. “Daddy Wolverine, Flower! Come over here! Let’s listen to the Guitar Hero do his thing!” He patted the empty spaces near him. “Let’s all sit together!”

“It still surprises me that you’re all happy despite how dark our real job is.” Lotus was the only female present at the moment, but she decided to sit down next to her gang leader while Sukiru refused to move anywhere close to them.

“I don’t want to be called that.”

“Wolverine?”

“The “D” word, Aroon.”

“Daddy?”

“Yes.”

Kuga really didn’t know how this gang worked. Canción seemed so innocent, he was playing his guitar and it gave a calm atmosphere. Lotus was looking at papers and managing the plans, Sukiru was preparing dinner for the rest while Aroon was only messing around, while declaring his love for the gang… But… Gaia was nowhere to be found.

Kuga began looking around and Canción noticed him. “Oh! If you’re looking for Gaia, she’s in the basement.” He started playing the guitar again after he told her about one of his closest friends’ whereabouts. “She goes back up again once any of our amigos or amigas call her!”

“Thanks, Guitar Hero.”

“Hey? How dare you? Only I and the gang can call him that name. Be original, you runt.”

“Fuck you!”

“Please be quiet. I’m trying to organize these plans.” Lotus sighed before Aroon wrapped an arm around her and looking over at the papers she was holding.

“Okay. I’ll shut up now so you can do your managing skills. Canción, please play the song again. Sukiru continue making dinner. Damn I love my gang.”

Their voices faded as soon as Kuga decided to take some steps down to the basement. He was so lucky that he knew the secret pathway so he wouldn’t need to ask them anymore. Their basement had some targets and weapons, and even a couple of boards where there were a bunch of writings. He spotted the girl with brown hair and grey eyes.

The moment he took his last step, she turned around and pointed the gun she was currently holding at him. “Woah- Woah- Woah! It’s just me!” Kuga almost yelled but even if she shot him by accident, he could have dodged the bullet. She placed her gun in the holster before looking away.

“Sorry.” She doesn’t say a word besides that but she did walk to him and touch the right side of his cheek. Until now, Kuga didn’t understand every gesture she did, but he knew what this one meant.

“Yeah. I know. At most you’d only damage my cheeks.” He holds her hand and places it away. “It’s fine though! The greatest man in the whole yakuza would be able to dodge that kind of hit.” He always praised himself and she only smiled a tiny bit when he said those words.

“I don’t expect anything less from you, Terunori.” She smiled at him before squeezing his hands. “… Wait, I meant Kuga.”

“Actually, I prefer you calling me Terunori.” He allowed her to grip his hands. He was always told by her fellow members that only meant that she cared for you. “Masae.” It was only recently where he heard her real name, but he would only call her that when they’re alone.

“Still… not used to it.” There was a blush on her cheeks and he only laughed at her reaction.

“To be honest, I’m not used to seeing you with your real hair color and eye color either. But I don’t really mind it! Seeing your real self makes me think that you might like me.” He winked at her and he noticed that her grip only became softer and she pulled her hands away to cover her face.

“… Please don’t say that.” She mutters softly before she started walking away. “I’m going back to practice.”

“Aw! Did my charm make you fluster?” He tried to joke around but her steps only got faster. “I was kidding! At least let me practice with you before it’s time for dinner!”

They may have never really told each other’s feelings for one another yet, but they already knew each other’s answers.

#writing #mi tanaka #tatsuya sato #yuriko #riku #michiko #toshio #masae milas #takashi #kuga terunori #tetsuji kabutoyama #other people's ocs #moe #keiko #hanako #emile

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