#I have fucking THOUGHTS ABOUT THEM OKAY !!! OKAY!!!!!!!!! GAH

[delusionsofspace]

Ideas/HCs based off friend post?? <3

OH MAN LMAO OKAY UH?

I wasn't expecting AU asks but that actually is a fucking hilarious concept to me

Edit I am adding a fucking readmore because I am INSANE please click for submas rambles

So the tags say l4d and I'm gonna be so fr I don't know a lot of the lore, but I do know zombies and that there are special types

I honestly think, theres two kinds of scenarios that can definitely play out and it all depends on if Ingo gets amnesia or not (if we go with the no pokemon theory, therefore Uxie does not exist, BUT there are other ways to get amnesia so we vibing) because there are plenty of scenarios that make sense for random persok to have serious amnesia. If Ingo just, Wakes Up somewhere he definitely would be logical about it and start off with "I must have been injured whilst trying to survive" rather than "I'm from a different fuckikf universe help me"

My first thought is, if he does get amnesia from idk hitting his head or just Arceus being a cunt, then I think he is a very practical man and would adjust accordingly. He would be stressed as fuck, yeah sure. He would be VERY unhappy about having to be more aggressive in his stance on how he approaches situations (and not understand why he feels like there should be somebody else at his side handling more aggressive/threatening scenarios) but, much like in Hisui, he can definitely go from being funny train man so scarily ripped old man who can and Will deal with shit as needed.

I think guns would absolutely be a learning curve, though. He is used to the loudness because of trains, and I personally headcannon Ingo as hard of hearing and that's why he yells so much (which he would also have to learn to control to not alert the zombies in his immediate area) but I still think he is autistic enough to probably not appreciate how loud guns are. I think he would Deal With It but be moderately grumpy about it, I also think he sould probably be a great shot because of how calculating he can be, rather than if Emmet was in the situation where he would just shoot first and think second.

If we were in a situation where Ingo did have his memory though, I genuinely think that woukd be worse in a way?

The entire time he would be trying so hard to get back to Emmet, it would be literally his only goal, right next to not dying. He would probably speak about Emmet a lot, and also regularly use him as his motivation. God forbid he got injured, his only words would be "I can't die here, I need to get back to him, he must be so worried". He would absolutely also likely put his own health above others slightly more than if he had amnesia, because when he cannot clearly remember Emmet he falls back into his protective older brother stance of making sure everyone else is okay first. ESPECIALLY if they are kids, like in Arceus with the player character.

I also think if he ever got returned to Emmet, he would be much more of a changed man than when/if he returns from normal Hisui. Like deeply traumatized type beat. Amnesia or not, returning to a safe place after being in a horrible location that you literally have to kill to survive would do numbers on his mental health. I think he likely would end up very jumpy, with some form of PTSD, maybe even from the guns and would have issues with loud sudden banging noises. I think he would likely require Emmet to straight up be like a service animal (servive sibling? lmao) to keep him company in public so he wouldn't start tweaking. Crowds would probably stress him out, and he'd also probably be much more touch repulsed than before hand, where I imagine Ingo to be neutral to touch while Emmet is deeply touch adverse (minus Ingos touch, obviously)

Wow I fucking rambled . More asks if you have more questions please because I am unwell (I also deeply enjoy this AU idea ngl I think we should traumatize Ingo a little bit more. For the sillies. It's enrichment to him)

[loverboybrightsideghost]

so has anyone checked rusty quill's youtube lately

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

night sucker, m | jjk

pairing(s): jungkook x reader

summary: You and your hot-sexy-maybe-an-idiot-but-definitely-horny-and-always-perfect boyfriend Jeon Jungkook had mutually agreed not to fuck in the middle of the night. And... Well. You're still gonna fuck in the middle of the night. What?! It just happened! He slipped and his dick fell in your mouth! (It's the weekend, it's okay! :D)

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; established relationship; playful banter and shitty jokes; you were asleep (not really) until his dick fell in your mouth (nice!); crack and fluff; smut (fem reader, m and f-receiving oral, fingering, m-masturbation, face sitting); squabbling tbh; non-idol!BTS - short black-haired!JK with his two lip rings; the parenthesis are the reader’s inner thoughts

crackhead best laid plans / counter point / well dressed / cursed hours couple no need to read the others, but they’re there if you want more

--

You woke up to your boyfriend’s hard dick sliding into your open lips.

Fuck yeah!

(Do we sense a kink developing? Mayhap.)

Most people would be a little surprised, annoyed perhaps, but thankfully you were pretty used to the unhinged horny behavior of Jeon Jungkook (encouraging it, even, oop). You weren’t completely in the dark (well, you were – er, never mind) about it, because you had felt the very suspicious bowing of the bed by your right shoulder, plus you could smell him (mmmm, that vanilla almond body wash still lingered), and you had sucked his cock many, many, many times before. Oh. Right. Should have led with that.

Point was, your mouth was well acquainted with his dick.

(You’d have matching friendship rings but Jungkook would complain too much, keke.)

Delicately, you turned your head a bit and molded your tongue around the shaft, feeling the head twitch in your throat as his hips began to carefully thrust. Jungkook must have known that you were awake and not sleep-sucking his dick, but he wasn’t making any obvious noises.

(The aforementioned kink alive and well, folks!)

You heard him shudder and felt his fingertips skim over your cheek and clavicle. Probably to check the distance. His right leg must have been hovering over your body (you appreciated him not kneeing you in the boob, thank you, very kind), with his left knee by your right shoulder. You started curling your tongue back and forth as he moved, keeping your head still, and Jungkook gasped (a little too loud, pfft), being slightly rougher about it as your throat closed in around his twitching cock. He was mumbling something (useless prayers, your name, fuck me, the usual), and you still hadn’t moved your limbs yet, keeping the illusion alive. All activity in the depths of your mouth, squeezing, swirling your tongue around, letting him pause and edge himself with your lips rubbing the bottom of the swollen head, before shoving himself back in with a whining hiss, surprisingly not too deep, giving a whole new meaning to the term night sucker.

(Insert eyebrow wiggle here.)

His breathing was deepening, taking himself to the edge again, probably enjoying his full control of the pace as he filled your mouth over and over again, slow, deep, almost lazy, reaching his full girth and hardness.

This was when you let him know you were actually awake.

Because you grabbed his ass and jammed his cock all the way to the base, his balls smacking into your chin.

“Gah!”

You heard his palms smack into the headboard (or wall?) and, without giving him a moment to react, you extended the tip of your tongue past your lips to lick his balls, raising the back of your tongue to cup his cock and press It repeatedly against the back of your warm, tight throat.

“Woah, h-hey!”

You tipped your head back and took him deeper. Circled around his balls, leaving them wet, slippery, and tingling. His gruff, half-asleep moan drifted up to the ceiling, mixed with an exasperated whimper.

“I was… I was s-supposed to be catching you off guard… Now you’re just showing off!”

(He’s not wrong.)

You lifted your torso a bit, twisting, and rubbed your breasts against his thigh, sending sparks all throughout your torso. (Mmmm.) He was all tensed up and hard (heh) from maintaining his position above you. You knew he could feel your hard nipples because you heard the snack of his fist against the wall and his defeated groan, his head falling forward.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck…”

Jungkook was hot – er, ahem, ran hot. While being trapped between his (very sexy) legs was (very super) arousing, the summertime night heat was being exacerbated by his (very hot) body (you get the point), so you lowered back down to your pillow, kneading his incredible ass (won’t start again but, man, did you love his obsession with working out), nudging him to start moving again.

Thus, you comfortably enjoyed him face-fucking you, providing plenty of tongue action in your own right, his balls smacking against your chin with each thrust, with your spit sticky on your skin.

(Didn’t think that though, huh. Oh well.)

He kept a steady but intense pace. Since he led the movement, you could focus every muscle in your mouth – loose and soft around the length, lips tight, tongue roughly stimulating all his favorite spots, just under the head and along the underside, your saliva providing that frictionless slip, and then you felt his body shift.

His hand was moving.

A startled yelp stifled by his cock vibrated in your throat as his fingers slid down your stomach. His gasps hiked in pitch, and you curved your hips towards his touch, folding one of your legs to raise your lower body, and then his searching fingers grazed over your slick, dripping pussy, bringing the fire.

(And setting the night alight, iykyk.)

The human body could do a lot of creative things in the name of horny. Awkward body positions could be made comfortable by depraved adrenaline, and that was exactly what was happening right now, since there was no way in hell you were going to complain about Jungkook burying two fingers into you and sloppily rubbing your throbbing clit with his thumb. Not that you could say anything at all with him relentlessly thrusting his full-mast dick into your mouth (mhm, you just gushed down there, oh yeah, you felt that), rapidly building up his orgasm, deeply, slowly cutting off your air.

You could hold your breath a little longer.

(You could, in the name of lewd!)

And you were losing yourself in the pleasure, his fingers pumping in and out, fast and powerful, the wet slaps obscene, rocking your hips to his hand, tilting your head back as you sensed his body tensing up, his sounds ceasing into mute ecstasy and then.

“F-Fuck, yeeeeeees!”

He exploded (like… dynamite!), filling the back of your mouth with way too much cum (damn, his internal factories been working overtime), thick and heady and intense. Delicious. He stopped moving, soaking in the bliss, and you didn’t have a moment to swallow because you were too preoccupied hitting your own high, arching your spine, your eyes rolling back, your spasming pussy sucking in his fingers, sweat sticking to the top of your chest.

On instinct, you swallowed.

Too fast. Jungkook whined, pleading and desperate. Evidently, he seemed to figure out that you couldn’t control it since he didn’t react violently, only hitting the wall again (rest in disturbance, neighbors), screaming behind closed lips. You drew back a little, ghosting your tongue over the head, gently, and he moaned, drawn-out and wanton, clutching the headboard like a lifesaver as he was drowning in heavenly euphoria.

Wait.

His fingers were still stuffed into your pussy.

That meant he hit the wall with his forehead.

(Bro, you good?)

You couldn’t ask, but you patted his thigh to get his attention. After a moment of slow thrusting, you felt him try to move away (you sucked a little harder and Jungkook yelped at the oversensitivity,), and so you let go, only to be slapped in the face with his wet, half-hard cock.

“Ow.”

“Serves you right,” Jungkook shot back, sounding utterly drained. He still hadn’t moved his fingers from inside you. “How’d you wake up so fast?”

(‘Cause you’re not subtle, my lovely dummy.) “Mmmm, guess my mouth knows what to do when you put your dick in it.”

“Sus.”

He was stroking your wet pussy.

“What are you doing?”

“Touching your pussy, duh.”

You shifted your eyes and saw the fingers of his free hand wrapping around his hard cock. “Um.”

“What?”

“Nothin’, I was just thinkin’, ya know, I’m not very involved here.”

You were mocking his Busan accent and Jungkook growled, shoving another finger into you to express his irritation (wink wink). You didn’t react much except for grinning and spreading your thighs open more.

“Aren’t you sleepy? I’m thinking about your feelings.”

You were trying not to laugh at his poor attempt to be somewhat deadpan. Pretty difficult considering he was jacking himself off while fingering you. You clenched around his fingers and Jungkook hissed, whispering under his breath, again, and you did it again, fuck, feels so fucking good when you do that, ugh, and the fake spat was forgotten. Your hips rising, your hands fanning over your breasts, toying with your hard nipples, for you to melt and for him to watch, hotter, your chest tightening, biting your lip hard, the sting of pain deliberately delaying your rapidly building orgasm.

“Open your mouth, quick–”

You slid down and he shot thick, warm streams onto your tongue. Gasping and shuddering, those big eyes staring down at the amount (quite a lot, damn, proud of him) and you kept your cum-covered tongue extended, right up until you came onto his three fingers stretching you out, leaning your head back to let his orgasm hit the back of your throat as the first intense waves overcame you, strong flinches resonating up to your chest and head, swallowing and clamping your thighs shut around his muscular forearm.

A suspended, elated moment as you came down, gradually relaxing.

“Hah… fuck… uh…?”

Your tongue lazily snaked out and covered the tip of his softening cock, licking it off.

“Mmmm… ah, yeah…”

“How long you been planning that?” you asked without opening your eyes, squeezing his arm.

“I didn’t plan it.”

You could believe that. Jungkook didn’t plan shit. “Hmmmm…!”

“I swear!” He sounded like he was pouting. “I just happened to wake up really horny.”

This was not news. However, you continued to play dumb. “In the middle of the night?”

“Uh, yeah?”

“HMMMM!”

“What?! You’re naked!”

(Wait a second. Hold your oxen.) Your eyes snapped open. “Where are my panties?”

“Eh, I dunno.”

“Jungkook! You can’t just hide my panties whenever you want!”

(Yes, he can.)

“Uh, yeah, I can…!”

(Sigh.)

Your boyfriend’s teasing voice was sing-song and freaking annoying.

You shot up, and Jungkook was laughing, his short hair stuck up every which way (his bedhead was somethin’ fierce, so cute), backing up, and you saw your underwear on his nightstand, prompting a brief but rather titillating naked wrestling match. You lunged over him and Jungkook grabbed your waist, dragging you back with a prissy nuh uh, and you squirmed and twisted (probably turning him on, yup, you heard him moan a little just now), pawing for your panties. Somehow you hooked a leg over his shoulder, streaking a smear of your still-wet pussy over his built chest, and you attempted to sit on him. Repeatedly. Jungkook wasn’t making it very easy.

“Ow, damn, I worked out my chest today, come on!”

(If you insist.)

You stuck your tongue out to the biggest peepers glaring at you from below.

Then you got a great idea.

Brillant, really.

You sat on Jungkook’s face.

His big eyes shot open even wider and you had a moment of pre-nut clarity, since (um) your legs were a bit askew and you were half-crouching over him like a gremlin (not the hottest look), but in less than a second, Jungkook had his hands on your ass and lifted you up, planting your trembling pussy firmly onto his hungry mouth, shoving his tongue inside you. You gasped, clutching fistfuls of the sheets for some sense of stability. Meanwhile, your man was in a different dimension, groaning loudly under you and making your insides vibrate with his sound, jarring for a moment before you forgot whatever it was that had surprised you, oooh, damn, you couldn’t remember for the life of you what the heck you were worried about, too busy grinding onto his nose like a mate in heat.

(Ah… well, let’s not go there for today. Uh.)

Your panties were within reach, but you didn’t care, throwing your head back and moaning as you felt his tongue glide all over, rubbing against your clit, sucking on it noisily, more for effect than for pleasure, making you laugh, and then you melted into his hands, rocking your hips forward.

The palms of his hands pushed against your abdomen, and you realized his (big) nose was having trouble breathing (serves you right!), but after a moment of resisting on purpose, you leaned back, snickering at the gush of hot air washing over your crotch, his low moan trapped in his chest. He pinned your thighs in place, and you flexed them, feeling the power in his hands, shivering in delight at the sensations of his closed lips and swirling tongue, precise and careful and better than you remembered it. You pressed your hips into his mouth and he got the hint, putting more strength into it, there, ah, fuck, yes, Jungkook, clenching your core to hold yourself up.

Hey, you worked out too! (Okay, yes, it’s a stretch but we gotta take the small wins where we can.) Your ass was going to get sweaty at this rate (see!) due to how warm Jungkook was getting (oh…), but you sacrificed for the greater good (cumming on his face), consumed by the harsh rhythm of his tongue, closing your eyes, blanketed in lust-drunk darkness, your muscles tensing, clenching your jaw.

“Mmmm, yes, Jungkook, yes…!”

Strangely you could only now really feel the press of his two lip rings in the dip of your thigh, but perhaps that was because you were forcefully gripping his head and pressing your throbbing pussy into his mouth, moaning, your torso flinching strongly, throwing yourself forward with a gasp, another wave of your orgasm shooting up from between your legs, spreading all over your shaking chest and through your arms. Aaaaaaah. The high wound down, dissipating all over. Your limbs were giving the consistency of fruit jelly.

Delicious.

Actually.

You could use some bingsoo right now, to be honest.

Fuck, it was hot.

You let out an exhilarated exhale, lifting your hips (someone was smacking your thigh, how odd), and Jungkook gulped lungfuls of air, groaning, running his tongue up and down between your legs as you reached over and snatched up your underwear.

Truth was…

You had indeed been jostled awake to Jungkook fumbling around with your panties earlier. Even lifted your hips to help him out. You had known damn well what was coming. Ten minutes of him laying down next to you, his hand over your pussy, calmly caressing the outer lips. Allegedly, he innocently liked to touch your bits because your pussy was pretty. He just wanted to hold it before he went to sleep. Uh huh. Yeah, okay. Even if that was true (it was, how sweet), inevitably, his lizard brain would overcome him (and that it did) and you would soon end up in a compromising position (in this case, his dick in your mouth, mhm, talk about a midsummer night’s dream). If you hadn’t wanted it, you would have stopped him, but (not gonna lie) his dick was a very tasty midnight snack.

It was the weekend, so might as well give into the voices.

(He was probably getting you back for all the times you shook him awake at three in the morning to ride his hard dick, as he should. We’re all unhinged in this house.)

You got off him and Jungkook complained immediately, only to be shut up by you throwing the hand towel on your nightstand at him.

“You’re sweaty!”

“Whose fault is that?!”

“Yours, you horndog!”

“I didn’t tell you to sit on my face!”

“Oh, like your big peepers weren’t BEGGING for it!”

“Well, SOR-REEEE that I think my future wife is hot, what a CRIME!”

He was following (chasing) you to the bathroom. You attempted to close the door in his face and he shoved his naked booty in there with you despite your protests of needing to pee.

“So what! I’m looking!”

“You’re such a creep,” you accused (fondly).

You sat down on the toilet and did your business with Jungkook pointedly staring at you and you pointedly staring back. He was wiping down his shoulders. In the bathroom light, you could see his black hair was slightly damp from sweat. His forehead was glistening, droplets beaded on his skin. His pecs were indeed looking especially delectable today. You stared harder. He twitched and did the same, his big brown eyes making him look extra psycho. He raised the towel just a bit, and you jumped for the toilet paper.

“EY!”

You smacked his tattooed forearm. “Wipe your face!”

“This is the best part!”

“You’re gross,” you snapped, somewhat annoyed but also too used to it (this was the definition of being too comfortable with each other), finishing up neatly and quickly, flushing with a glare before getting up to wash your hands. “What weirdo stands there when a girl is going to the bathroom?”

He looked extremely offended and pouty. “Um, your future husband?”

“My future husband is a creep,” you chirped annoyingly, rinsing off your hands and drying them off.

“As I should be,” Jungkook shot back. “How else will you know I love you?!”

“By being, I dunno, nice and wholesome?”

“I am wholesome! That’s why you put up with me!”

You flapped your hands in mock exasperation.

“What would you do without me?”

Jungkook clasped a hand over his chest, all hilarious dramatics, putting on a solemn expression.

“Be full of cum and empty of heart.”

He placed the back of his hand over his forehead, pretending to sob. You fell into him in roaring laughter, wrapping your arms around him. He immediately showered you with kisses amidst giggles, the towel around his shoulders, flicking his sweat on you (freaking annoying), and you couldn’t ask for a better man. Jungkook could propose to you with a goddamn tempura onion ring and you’d say yes. You were only complaining to complain. It was fun to bicker knowing full well neither of you meant it.

That was how you knew this love was true and perfect.

(See, look at us, a wholesome lovey-dovey couple!)

You both had to spend several minutes standing in the apartment naked, enjoying the air-conditioning, wondering out loud if your neighbors heard anything, asking each other if, hm, maybe a house should be in the works at some point? The living room couldn’t always be Jungkook’s personal gym (yes, it could, he liked to work out while watching television and you weren’t gonna stop him). Anyway, you two might need space, later, just in case.

“You know you’ll have to control yourself if we end up having kids.”

Jungkook made a face of mock disgust. “They’ll have to know how they were made eventually.”

You facepalmed.

(We’ll have to work on it. Future you problem. Future you was a sucker. For Jeon Jungkook. Gross.)

--

masterpost

[slamminslamminmcgill]

Can you pretty please write a fic where Logan and Deadpool are having an argument about how they should be fucking the reader, like going over techniques while the reader is just drooling and mindless like “whaaa”

hell YEAH i love getting fucked stupid by big strong men >:3333€

this is a rly good prompt btw so i could GLADLY expand on this but for rn here’s a snippet 😌

warning: dp, painal, sadomasochism, mild transphobia, slurs, degradation, overstim, dubcon, daddy kink

anatomical terms: cunt/pussy/bussy

They talk about you like you’re not even there.

Well, physically you were right there with them. Mentally you were nowhere to be found, certainly not on their conversational level. Wade had been bouncing you in his lap for god knows how long. His cock in your cunt had thoroughly fucked your train of thought off the tracks. Your internal monologue was nothing but bitchy whimpers and primal burning for more. Welp. What do you expect? Back to back orgasms will do to that to you. You couldn’t even recall how the argument started, and context would’ve really been helpful.

“Wow! Okay! That’s a shitty thing to say to our guest! Wanna apologize and maybe try that one again, JK Rowling?”

"Oh, get fucked. That's not what I meant and you know it." Logan kept his firm hands on your shoulders, assisting your bounce, since your legs were damn near liquified.

“Mmmmm, ah, gah-fuuuck… Wh... Wha? Huh?”

“How is that not what you meant?" Wade, questioned, maintaining his steel grip on your ass. He felt that he had to protect you from the big bad wolf and his transphobia. "You just said he’s not a real man because he has a pussy. A tight, sweet, JUICY pussy that feels like a fleshlight full of microwaved angel dust. And yet SOMEHOW this makes him not a real man to you? Maybe you’re just not man enough for HIM, sugar-tits!”

"I said you gotta fuck him like a real man. You’re being too good to him. It's gonna fuel his ego, and I’m not letting you turn him into a spoiled brat. Fuck him in the ass, that'll teach him a lesson. Show him this shit ain't a joke."

"No way! Ass is ass is ass is ass. Everybody's got an asshole, peanut, and newsflash? They all feel the same. But this boy's pussy? This hot buttery premium A5 wagyu bussy that's—SQUEEZINGmyfuckingdicksotight, oh, fuck, fuckfuckfuck, angel baby, sweet boy, you feel so GOOD! Making your Daddy feel so good, good boy!"

Praise was easy enough to process. It didn't require any cognitive effort on your part. You didn't have to weigh in and have an opinion, you just have to take it, and be grateful for it. "Hah, fuck! Thank—thank you, Daddy! FUCK! Wade! WadeWadeWadeWade—WADE! WadeWadeWade..."

But Logan wouldn't let it go. "I'm serious. Make him take it up the ass, or I will."

“Un-be-lievable. You know something? You must be the one guy in this universe who could see a whimsical forest path that leads to a magical unicorn fountain, and says 'Oh, no, none for me. Let me go spelunking in the poop-chute, thank you very much!' And if that's not the single gayest thing I've seen in my entire—"

"WADE, SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

"Eeep!"

Oh, you poor thing. He nearly gave you a heart attack! It's terrifying when someone yells out of nowhere, especially when that someone has you naked and vulnerable in their hands. Logan had slammed you down on Wade's cock when he yelled, completely stopping the scene and trapping you between them. Woah. Time out. Shit has officially just gotten real. You and Wade held bated breath, and traded a glance that said "We're cooked. Nice knowing ya."

But Logan just laughed at you both. Delighted by the atmospheric tension he had just created.

"Heh... heh heh heh..."

Then he relaxed his grip on you, and those big strong calloused man hands started to explore. They massaged your shoulders, rubbed your neck and jaw, and groped and squeezed wherever they pleased. All the while, his hot breath, tinted with whiskey and malice, ghosted over the shell of your ear as he talked. He spoke very firmly. Targeted. Slow. He wanted you to get every fucking word.

"Listen, bub. I’m not about to question whether or not you’re a man, okay? But I’ll say this. When real men wanna take cock? It hurts. Oh, it hurts real bad. And most of ‘em don’t get the luxury of a cushy little cunt that’s meant to take a pounding. No, son. Real men get ripped apart by cock. It makes them cry and scream and sometimes their tiny little rims even bleed because of it. And you know what? They love it. They love how much it hurts them. Cause they’re men. Strong men. And you’re no fuckin’ better than them, you know that? You think just cause you got another hole that you can take the easy way out? Everything's gonna be peaches and cream, huh? Nuh uh. Not on my watch, you little shit. You wanna act like you're such a fag? Well then you’re getting fucked like one of us too."

…

…

…

“Jesus fucking Christ, babycakes, if you don’t want him up your ass I’ll GLADLY take the heat for you.”

[prttykittes]

Hii i was wondering if you can write smt in which reader’s personality is similar to chii from chobits!!

⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡ preferably nsfw if that’s oki, any char from bsd is fine by me!

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ love your theme btw ！

I had to look up chii ! Is she from a hentai? (It said erotic on the wiki) Thank you for your compliment ! ꒰⁠⑅⁠ᵕ⁠༚⁠ᵕ⁠꒱⁠˖⁠♡

๑ Dazai, Atsushi, Mori x GN!reader [you/your]

— Synopsis:: you and your lover was doing romantically stuff and you and him decided to let loose and have some fun !

CW. Soft sex, awkward sex, first time, virginity loss, riding, pet names(sweetheart, spouse, hunny), smoking(Dazai), cock warming, protected sex, sex guiding, handjob(Dazai)

A/N :: chii from chobits, I had no idea what to do! @-@ I never saw chobits so sorry if this is bad! I had to add Mori in because Mori is one of my favorites, he is well written ! \⁠(⁠ϋ⁠)⁠/⁠♩- written by a minor. — no genitals expect from hole, this really isn't chii reader with her personality but eh

[MASTERLIST] — (⁠ʃ⁠ƪ⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠）works all of them !

DAZAI — (⁠♡⁠ω⁠♡⁠ ⁠)⁠ ⁠~⁠♪

Your chest was against his back. "dazai-kun!". You whined, he was blowing a smoke before you guys went to bed. You were on his back, he lets out a laugh. You roll off the bed, the floor meeting you. He continues to smoke as he continues to stare at you. "Eh?" He says before you go to him and put your face in his crotch. He blows out smoke before putting it in the ash tray, you rub your face in his crotch. "What are you doing?~" his voice playfully teasing you, you let out a sigh his body jolts and you lift up your head. "Dazai-kun!" You pout, he looks down between his legs. "Do you want to care of something~?" He says with a wide grin on his face, you tilt your head on confusion. Take care of something like a toy or an animal? You thought to yourself before nodding your head. "Take my pants off" he commands you, you nod and pull his pants until it's completely off his legs. "Now my underwear..." He says in a low voice, you lift up his underwear before you pull it down enough. His dick flops onto his stomach, you gasp as his penis stands up. "Woah" you poke at it, it twitches. "Wrap your hand around it~" he says, you nod and wrap your pretty hands around his shaft. "Mmh... Now up and down" he says, his voice was low. You nod your head and move your hand up and down. "Good job, sweetheart!" He pats your head, you smile and began to stroke faster. His praise wanted you to please him some more, your hands moving fastly. He moans and gently grips the back of your head, you stick out your tongue near his tip as you focused on pleasing him. He noticed your tongue out and began thinking about erotic thoughts about you giving him head, he shook it off because he thinks that you will gag. "Keep going, hunny" he pats your head and grabs your wrist, you take that as a sign to go faster. Some of his liquids drool down into your hand, some seconds later your whole hand was covered. "Woah" you say as some of his pre-cum was still drooling out, he groaned and his head was thrown back. "Fuck—" you continued to go faster until his dick twitches and his white cream goes all over your face. You take a lick of his tasty goodness, you want some more of his cream.

ATSUSHI — ╰⁠(⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠´⁠꒳⁠`⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠)⁠╯

You were both sitting down next to each other, he was blushing and his face was turn away from yours. He had wanted to lose his virginity with you but you were both awkward with each other. "Atsushi-kun?" You said his name and he flinched and yelp. "Gah! Yes {name}?!" He smiled at you, his hand holding yours. "Are you ready?" You poke his nose, he nods his nod and smiles before sighing. "Yeah, just I don't know what to do!" He said, you make an "O" face before smiling. "Me too! I am sure we can do it together!" You smile and hug him, he blushes and nods his head as well. "Okay!" He blushed and smiles, you get on the floor. Your hands are in his pants, you look up at him. You pull down his pants and his underwear, his dick flops onto your face. "Hehe!" You let out some giggles, he grabs you by the arm and lays you down on the bed. Your legs on his shoulder, you smile and you bring your fingers down to your hole. He blushes while he looks at your actions, he bites his lower lip. "Go ahead!" He nods his head while aiming at your entrance. He entered, your hole clenches around his dick. His dick twitches at the sudden warmth, you bite your lip. "AHh!" He almost falls on you but he manages to catch himself and he puts his face in your neck. He waits until you get comfortable then he began to move inside of you. "Keep moving!" You say and he nods his head, his movements never stop. His dick twitches before you can feel him filling you up.

MORI — ლ⁠(⁠・⁠﹏⁠・⁠ლ⁠)

"Mori!" You cried before you rest your head on his lap, he continued to write in his workpaper before he smiled and patted your head. "Ah! {Name} chan!" He smiled and lifted your face to meet his before he kisses your forehead. "Mori San" you place your head in his crotch, he smiles and pats your head. "Come sit on my lap, hunny!" He pats his lap, you smile and turn around before flopping down on his lap. "Garh" he grunts slightly before wrapping his arms around your waist, you smile and bounce on his lap. He ruffles your hair before going back to work, you got a bit bored so began rocking back and forth. "Mmh... Sweetheart can you stand up for a second?" You turn to face him and smile. You stand him while standing up you can hear a sound of a zipper. You feel his hands around your hips as he carefully and slowly puts you on something. "Huh?" You feel something filling you up. You twitch and in result you feel his thing twitch as well. "Just sit still and look cute, my dear!" He kisses your temple, he continues to work as you warm his cock until he decides to finish you off.

[jhunals]

team dragonborn dashboard simulator 2

(in which taliesin enjoys a new username, lucien has a panic attack, and nebarra is a bit of an opp)

prev. here

🐱 thlmr.tal Follow

For the last time, people, I do not endorse the Thalmor, despite what my username says. Gods.

🐉 ldb Follow

tally you know you can change your username right

🐱 thlmr.tal Follow

What? How?!

🐱 tally.loves.kitties

Thank you.

2,564 notes

⚔️ skyrimbelongstothen0rds Follow

🐊 lucifer.the.argonian Follow

i know you guys find this funny and all but op is a stormcloak supporter

⚔️ skyrimbelongstothen0rds Follow

Um. Did you read my DNI???

🐊 lucifer.the.argonian Follow

this is the kind of person whose stuff you're reblogging.

🥘 lawman_xel Follow

Lucifer, that's Nebarra's sideblog. He's trolling.

🐊 lucifer.the.argonian Follow

⚔️ skyrimbelongstothen0rds Follow

And I said no snowflakes either. I swear, we didn't have this problem when only Nords lived in Skyrim.

🌱 greenauri Follow

skyrim was never "only nords" tho

⚔️ skyrimbelongstothen0rds Follow

76,454 notes

🐱 tally.loves.kitties Follow

🖕nebarras_wines Follow

you post the worst memes i've ever seen in my fucking life

🐱 tally.loves.kitties Follow

15,603 notes

🌺 khash.khash Follow

i thought adventuring with a group of adults would teach me something about life or responsibility. all it has taught me is to wear armor at all times

🌼 wanderingmusings Follow

so glad you finally joined tumblr!

🐊 lucifer.the.argonian Follow

do you need help setting anything up?

🗡️ dragonguard_kaidan Follow

I don't think this website is safe for a child.

🌺 khash.khash Follow

i am a teenage girl?? i have had this hellsite for years

4,567 notes

📜 scholarlucien Follow

someone stole my study notes guys im shaking and heaving

🌱 greenauri Follow

he's not using proper punctuation. this is serious

😈 bluecatinigo Follow

i'm so sorry, lucien. make an awareness post and then wait a bit. i'm sure they'll turn up.

📜 scholarlucien Follow

i can NOT let anyone see these inigo. theyre extremely personal

📜 scholarlucien

ugh im gonna be sick

😈 bluecatinigo Follow

take a deep breath, my friend. use the technique i taught you. everything will be okay

📜 scholarlucien Follow

agh okay. im pretending to put out dragonflame

🌼 wanderingmusings Follow

ah i think i found them!

📜 scholarlucien Follow

oh thank you thank you thank you so much

🌼 wanderingmusings Follow

it's these, right?

😈 bluecatinigo Follow

oh my.

📜 scholarlucien Follow

GAH OH GODS OH GODS

🌱 greenauri Follow

i wish you'd told us about this, lucien. i have some input to share!

📜 scholarlucien Follow

KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME

🐉 ldb Follow

lucien what

🗡️ dragonguard_kaidan Follow

By the Gods

👹 rumarin Follow

where did you rank me?

48,942 notes

urls (again):

ldb = the last dragonborn

thlmr.tal / tally.loves.kitties = taliesin

skyrimbelongstothen0rds / nebarras_wines = nebarra

lucifer.the.argonian = lucifer

lawman_xel = xelzaz

khash.khash = khash (yes its a dumb pun on cash cash)

wanderingmusings = caryalind thallery (incognito)

bluecatinigo = inigo

scholarlucien = lucien

greenauri = auri

rumarin = rumarin

[hils79]

Hils Watches The Spirealm - Ep 1

Well, it's time to watch a new drama and this has been on my list since basically the day it dropped and was then removed an hour later. Looking forward to seeing just how gay it is.

Considering how much people have been talking about it I don't actually know that much about it really. I know Lost Tomb Reboot Xiaoge, my boy Huang Junjie, is one of the leads and that it's an adaptation of a danmei novel (I think?). But in terms of the actual plot no idea.

And how do you even pronounce the title? The Spire Realm?

I have many questions and I haven't even started watching yet.

Okay, I'm going in.

For the sake of clarity I am watching this on Viki so I will be using their episode numbering system not the original one.

Wait, is this a gaming drama? Like The King's Avatar?

Ah, so it's VR rather than a classic video game

Well, that sort of explains how you pronounce it but not really. Is it more like The Spy Realm?

A game where you experience severe hallucinations and possibly die? Who would play such a game? I'll take one guess...

Okay, the only drama I've seen him in is The Lost Tomb Reboot so it's going to take a while for me to get used to him speaking and having regular facial expressions

BWAHAHA! Zero lies detected

I'm pretty sure this is not Huang Junjie's actua voice, and the dubbing doesn't quite match the movements of his mouth. But I'm not complaining, I'm just glad we're able to watch it at all

Uhh...has he got super hearing? Or is he getting all messed up because he played the hallucination death game?

KITTY!

I know they've explained it as 'hallucinations' but this feels very urban fantasy, which is a genre I particularly enjoy

Ohhh! Okay. When the dude said people sometimes die playing the game I kind of thought he meant it gave them seizures or something. But no, he just walked into the path of an oncoming car because he was looking at something that only he can see. I guess that's the sort of deaths the dude was talking about

Oh so he actually does have super hearing! Well, I hope someone in the DMBJ fam is writing the Liu Sang version of this

Oh hello

Uh oh

Well, the answer to how gay is it is them looking like they're about to kiss 2 minutes after they met. Good work everyone.

Okay, I haven't learned anyone's name yet but I do hope this is setting the tone for the rest of the drama. Dude in white pretending to be badly injured from a small scratch on his arm and Huang Junjie immediately being 'OMG LET ME CARRY YOU 🥺' even though it's obvious the other dude is faking

Well this just turned into The Ring very quickly

Ehehe. There's only one bed.

GAH! JESUS FUCK THE GHOST IS IN THEIR BEDROOM! Is now the time to mention I'm not good with horror?

I don't know how I'm supposed to survive another *checks* 37 episodes when they're acting like this already

[jungwnies]

warnings : hand job, cursing, arguing, mentions of cheating (no one cheated), jealousy, smut , very descriptive , mdi pairing : boyfriend!yeonjun x gn!reader

                              𖤐 kinktober masterlist 𖤐

yeonjun's eyes were fixated on the road before him. the two of you were on your way back home from the beach and to be honest, the beach wasn't all that pleasant.

you and yeonjun happened to have an argument about him being too much of a flirt, him staring at other people while you guys were at the beach, and it was just all jealousy.

it's not that you felt insecure in your relationship but more so, you couldn't trust anyone else around yeonjun.

he was yours, and you didn't want anyone to look at him. but you couldn't necessarily yell at random people for looking at your boyfriend like candy, so you resorted to taking it out on him.

"jun, can you please talk to me." you beg as yeonjun's eyebrows were furrowed. "i know you're mad but, i'm really sorry."

"do you not trust me y/n? i prove to you that i love you more than anything else, but you continue to make me feel like i'm a cheater or something." yeonjun snaps. "does my loyalty mean nothing to you?"

"it means everything to me junnie, you mean so much to me and i just, i got jealous." you admit sighing.

yeonjun takes his right hand of the wheel and grabs yours, his eyes still fixed on the road. "y/n, i love you so much, i would never do anything that would hurt you."

"junnie..." you say putting taking your hand from his and putting it on top of his thigh. "i'm really sorry."

yeonjun knew where this was about to go, the way your hand was right below his dick. the way your hand rubbed his thigh up and down, "y/n, i'm driving."

"it wouldn't be the first time though, right?" you tease pulling the end of the drawstring that kept his shorts up. you tug at his shorts and pull them down slightly with the help of yeonjun slightly holding himself up so you could properly pull down his shorts.

"gah, y/n." yeonjun says breathily as you rubbed your hand against his cock. "we've still got a long way to go, love."

"just shut up jun, let me do this for you." you hiss. your eyes were fixed on the road as well, but your hand was focused on his cock. your hand went from the tip of his cock to the base of his balls.

"god y/n, always doing some fuck shit in the car." yeonjun bites as he feels your finger rub down the slit of his cock. "you never fucking listen."

"you know you love this, junnie." you say as you continue to rub up and down.

pre-cum leaking from his cock helping you lubricate him for an easier hand job. "look at you, all hard and leaky just for my hand."

"fuck y/n, stop messing around." yeonjun moans as you stopped rubbing down his cock.

"i thought you wanted me to stop?" you tease turning your head towards him. you lean towards him, buckle still on and kiss his neck sucking slightly leaving a mark. your hand continued to go up and down on his cock.

“no, no it’s okay.” yeonjun moans as you continue to go up and down.

you move your hand away, “are you sure?” you ask and yeonjun nods.

quacking your pace, you can feeling yeonjun begin to buck his hips. "shit, y/n, fuck!" he moans loudly shooting out strings of cum onto your hand.

"i hope you can forgive me jun." you whisper in his ear leaving one last mark on his neck before pulling away.

2022 © jungwnies

taglist [closed] : taglist : @luvsoobs , @floweryjessy , @fairyoftaehyun , @toxicccred , @suga-nya , @baldi-2 , @effielumiere , @army24–7 , @felixpapi , @sk1reader , @choihyunsuk02 , @synnfulqt , @8211997 , @ruefulposts , @sunnyteume , @dinosaur-i-am , , @number1jihyofan , @bollocks-io , @lilactangerine , @itbtoblikethatsometimes , @l1a00 , @lexxxtxt , @kayleeshinee , @emonatural191 , @emmaroseb8729 , @jerrykarrot , @peachymccnsthoughts , @strawberr1esandcream , @linlovejunhui , @burningupp-replies , @Hobiibobii , @tvqir , @lemon-sqvare , @bonescanwrite , @frommypasttlife , @soonyoungsworld , @vern0nsworld , @solihwng , @bekah931215 , @bangtanjake , @hoseoksteardrop , @ggyulicious , @lvuaniyah , @vatterie , @donkydok , @sunghoonsluv , @ericvoguue , @leyss , @duolingofanaccount , @kendalllovestxt , @pshchives , @f4iryhyjin , @evan-rose , @wubbster , @viagumi , @junniessugar , @kyufessions , @fearwonu , @prettxyliies , @fairyoftaehyun , @lydiairl , @nanamik3nto , @yeosayang , @parkweylynwraya , @iliana26 , @sansluvr , @cha0thicpisces (bolded - could not be tagged)

[keirawantstocry]

An idea: Pac and Fit learn and then watch Tubbo doing his trampoline (or maybe even gymnastics in general) routine<3

oh tia. have i mentioned you're a genius. rotating this in my mind. i didn't do it justice nobody can. gah its just so good

“What's this?” Pac asked, as Fit and him walked up to Tubbo's place. There he stood next to a large rectangular trampoline with cushions on the sides. 

“I used to be a trampolinist when I was younger,” Tubbo said as he began to shed the outer layers of his outfit. Pac barely processed his words as his eyes narrowed in on the strong thighs now on display under short black shorts and the muscled biceps under the tank top. 

He glanced up and saw Fit's eyes trained on the same thing. Fit noticed him looking and glanced up at him. Their eyes were saying the same thing to each other. 

“Bagi suggested I get back into it,” Tubbo continued as Pac tore his attention away from Fit, away from Tubbo's thighs and tried to pay attention to what he was saying. “It's a way to release pent up stress and energy.” 

“There's other ways to release pent up energy,” Pac muttered under his breath in Portuguese. 

“What was that?” Tubbo said, looking up but thankfully the translator hadn't caught it. 

“Nothing,” Pac said, trying to look innocent and like he hadn't just been staring at Tubbo's thighs again. 

Tubbo squinted at him suspiciously but turned back around to climb onto the trampoline. Their eyes were definitely not zeroed in on his ass. 

With a quick few bends to his torso followed by snapping, Tubbo was ready. 

The performance could only be explained as incredible. Every movement of his body was fluid and followed the move before it perfectly. Pac was utterly obsessed with the way his muscles twisted and flexed with his movements. How his calves flexed, how his incredibly strong core kept himself balanced through every flip and jump. 

The flips were the main event, up and down over and over again as he flipped, quickly tucking his knees in before straightening again to touch down and bounce back up even higher. He spun in the air, elegantly twisting with his arms tucked into his sides. 

Pac would be the first to admit that trampolining didn't seem like a very attractive sport but now? Watching Tubbo land gently with a flushed face and wide grin, he had to change his mind. 

With barely a glance at Fit he could tell his boyfriend was thinking the same thing. 

Tubbo climbed carefully off the trampoline and stood in front of them, panting heavily. “Good?” he said with a laugh. 

“So good,” Pac said, feeling dizzy as his eyes dipped down the sweat dripping down Tubbo's chest. 

“It was amazing,” Fit said, slightly more capable of thought then Pac was. 

“Is your boyfriend okay?” Tubbo asked Fit with a slight laugh. “He's fucking vibrating.” 

They both looked at him and Fit laughed loudly. “Yeah, yeah, he just wants to jump your bones so bad it's making him dizzy.” 

“Fitch!!” Pac cried out, avoiding both of their eyes. “Shut up.” 

Fit laughed, that deep laugh from his chest as Tubbo eyed him curiously. “Is that so?” 

Pac perked up at his inflection. “Are you interested?” 

Tubbo flushed, looking between two of them. “Pac, man, your boyfriend is right there.” 

“So?’ 

Tubbo raised an eyebrow incredulously. “I… I don't think he'd appreciate you flirting with me right in front of him.” 

“Pffft,” Pac said, waving him off. “Não, pretty sure he wants to… jump your bones as he said as well.” 

Tubbo froze. “Sorry… what?” 

Pac couldn't stop his eyes from dipping down again as a drop of sweat fell from his face onto the stretch of skin above his shirt. His brain short-circuited. 

Distantly he could hear Fit's rumbling laugh. “Aw come on, Tubbo. If you don't know by now that he wants you, you're kind of stupid.” 

Tubbo spluttered. “Hey, I'm not stupid! Wait, he wants me?” 

“Don't talk about me like I'm not here,” Pac said half heartedly, taking a step forward so he could run his hand over Tubbo's collarbone. 

“Fit,” Tubbo said in a strained voice. “You better tell me if you're serious or not right now before I actually make out with your boyfriend right fucking now.” 

“Go right ahead. As long as I get a shot at you next.” 

Tubbo let out a weak noise of surprise before he and Pac were falling into each other desperately, all clumsy hands and gentle mouths.

[helluvahusker]

Gah okay wait I just had a thought. Work with me here. Blitzø does NOT enjoy hurting people's feelings like, forreals forreals unless he's been hurt first. We can see that in Truth Seekers when he asks Moxxie why he keeps his true feelings inside because Blitzø only wants people to be honest with him. He gets anger from Loona and cheerful (usually) indifference from Millie and exaggerated tolerance from Moxxie, or so he thought. Look, he's gonna keep being mean and being a peeping stalker because that's who he is right now. But he still didn't want to be someone that Moxxie felt like he couldn't stand up to.

And then in Oops with Fizz, he's so fucking angry. He thinks Fizzaroli abandoned him, so he's a dick. Actually, they have a pretty similar style in that they both think the other hates them for unjustified reasons so they're expressing that their hurt by trying to hurt each other further. Still, when Fizz starts asking for more information, Blitzø is so quick to give to him AND apologize and get emotional and be sincere. Bam, over a decade of believing false information starts unraveling with one deep meaningful conversation.

Which of course brings us to Stolas and The Full Moon. Relationship number 3 where Blitzø does not realize that what he's saying is truly hurting someone, and that he needs to adjust. Firstly, he immediately starts to apologize except Stolas kicks him out before he can. And then at the end of TFM and beginning of Apology Tour he's just. So hurt and confused and still so sure Stolas is fucking with him AND won't even have sex with him about it like wtf. Still, at the end of the ep all he wants to do is apologize to Stolas and make it better. But Stolas isn't like Moxxie and Fizz. He's not an imp, for one thing, so his upbringing is something Blitzø cant really understand, and the feelings they have for each other are way different.

But hey, Blitzø did in fact patch things up with Fizz and Moxxie, Moxxie being at the top of his apology tour list aside. Excited to see what happens, obviously.

[artbyremi]

This has been sitting on my laptop for ages so I thought I'd at least share the wip. Be mindful it's currently unedited so there may be a few grammatical errors.

Established Aprilnardo with mentions of blood/violence and swearing.

In which Leo shows up at April's after a pretty bad fight and April performs some emergency care.

Leonardo stood outside of April’s window, sopping wet from the rain that had recently passed. His face was a mess of cuts and bruises. His left eye purple and swollen from what must have been a pretty vigorous strike to the face. Directly below it was a nasty gash, possibly from a tanto, running about an inch long. A small bit of sticky red blood was oozing out of it. Leo hadseemingly tried to wipe it away earlier, but it was a futile attempt and only left a giant smear of red all over his cheek. 

April should have been used to this. 

It was the third time this month he’d shown up at her window with injuries. Though usually he didn’t look quite this bad. She feared what the rest of him looked like. 

There were a lot of perks that came with having a trained ninja as a boyfriend but the amount of fights Leo would find himself in was not one of them. April admired how much Leo wanted to protect the city. It was sweet and noble. She just wished it didn’t involve him getting hurt so much. 

April grabbed Leo’s face in her hands, not caring about getting blood on them. “What the hell happened to you?” She seethed as she turned his face around to inspect it. She found more cuts and a pretty bad bruise forming under his chin but nothing seemed life threatening. 

“Got ambushed,” Leo responded in a small croaky voice. 

“Ambushed by who?” April demanded as she prodded lightly at the gash on his cheek. 

“Just some ninjas–gah,” he leaned forward, grasping tightly at his side. 

April felt her heartbeat quicken, “What’s wrong?” She reached out to help him stand back up. Leo took her hands to steady himself. April chose to ignore how wet they were, lying to herself that it wasn’t blood. It had been raining earlier after all. Though rain usually wasn’t warm and sticky. 

“Got a little cut,” Leo forced out through gritted teeth. “You have that first aid kit? Aarrgh,” he winced, again grabbing at his side. “Can you help me wrap it?” 

April took in a deep breath through her nose and out through her mouth. She needed to calm down. Leo was alive. Pretty beaten up, but alive. He’d survived the whole mega mutant cracking his shell thing, he’d survive some cuts from a ninja gang. She’d ask about that later. Now, she just needed to focus on getting him wrapped up. “Okay–okay.” She pinched at her temples, “Just come inside and sit on my bed. I need to find the first aid kit.” 

Leo smiled at her softly, “Thanks, Hon.” 

April smiled back, giving his cheek a soft caress before heading out of her room in search of the first aid kit. 

When April returned with the small white box, she just about screamed. Leo was sitting on her bed, holding both hands securely to the left side of his plastron. A large mass of red was seeping out between his fingers. There was no more lying to herself. That was a lot of blood.

April tossed the first aid bin to the ground and ran to his side. “What the fuck, Leonardo!” 

Leo glanced up at her with glazed over eyes, “Sorry about your sheets,” he coughed, then struggled a bit for air, “I didn’t realize it was bleeding so much.”

April wanted to shake him by the shoulders and scream at him that she didn’t give a shit about blood on her sheets. However, her boyfriend sitting there bleeding out on her sheets, she cared about that. She cared about that a lot. 

April took another centering breath. She needed to keep her cool. She could kill him later but right now she needed to keep him alive. “Leonardo, I don’t think whatever’s in that tiny ass first aid kit is gonna be able to help with the—the,” she motioned to the cut, “giant laceration in your plastron!” April brought her hand up to run it through her hair to help calm herself. Keep it cool April. “You need to go to the hospital.” Leo shook his head, “Can’t,” he choked out. “We don’t have health insurance and Dad can’t afford the hospital bills.”

Damn. This country was so backwards. They save the whole city and still can’t afford health insurance. April shook her head. There wasn’t time to worry about that. Leo was sitting on her bed with a massive gash in his plastron losing more and more blood by the minute. She needed to get him to the ER like twenty minutes ago. 

“I know how to fix it. Raph cut his plastron when we were like thirteen. Dad and Donnie fixed it.” 

April couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Did he really expect her, a person with zero medical knowledge or ability, to perform some kind of emergency surgery? “Leo—“

“Please, April!” 

“Okay—okay.”

I do plan on finishing this eventually! Will be posted on my AO3

[creativitysparks4everxoxo]

Nah, but for real: WE NEED AN ANIMATED SERIES THAT FOLLOWS THE ADVENTURES OF MIRAGE AND NOAH AFTER THE EVENTS THAT TOOK PLACE IN ROTB!

I need a post-credit scene animated series follow-up!!!!

I just can't stop thinking about Noah and Mirage's interactions throughout the entire movie, and how the post-credit scene leaves us wanting more. It leaves me wanting to see just how many late nights Noah spent rebuilding Mirage from scratch. I want to see Noah's frustrated moments and his breakdown moments when all the memories of Mirage going to extreme lengths to protect him during the final battle flood his mind. I want to see an extremely exhausted but very determined Noah working on rebuilding Mirage.

I want to see the moment when Noah got to watch Mirage transform into his root mode for the first time after Noah made major progress with his repairs. (Assuming this happened before the post-credit scene) If it didn't, then instead I want to see the moment when Mirage first spoke to Noah during his repair stage and how absolutely ecstatic Noah was.

✨️ I want to see Noah's face when Mirage looks at him for the first time after his repairs. I want to see all the emotions on Noah's face and all the comfort that Mirage gives him! ✨️

Gimme all of the emotions!!!!!

But most importantly, I want to see Noah and Mirage's friendship continue to grow stronger throughout a multi-season animated series. At least 3 seasons minimum. I want to see it all!

I want to see them have those intense moments where they stare into each other's eyes/optics. I don't know how bold the writers would be for a show like this, or if they would be willing to go beyond the platonic borders of Noah and Mirage's relationship. It would be cool if there was romance between them in the show, but it might be considered "too much" to some people. Honestly though, I wouldn't mind if they took platonic relationship approach. I wouldn't mind because it works just as well and the writers could still write Mirage as the naturally teasing/flirty/over confident bot that he is and it would probably go over the bigots head. But we would know what's up. 🤭 And the extra Noah/Mirage content would give us fanfic/fanart inspo. It's essentially a win-win either way you slice it.

I just want a Mirage & Noah centric show, OKAY! 🥺

Gah! Just give us a show where we get to see Mirage take Noah on long drives to calm him down and they can talk about heavy shit. A late night drive to the beach, or even a drive to some fast food joint's drive thru, and then they go back to the garage and talk. Or they go for a walk in a secluded area.

Give us a show where Noah and Mirage get to have that "closure" and a chance to really talk about the moment where everything changed between them. The original deal was for Noah to steal the transwarp key from the museum and in return Mirage would let Noah "sell" him for cash that he could use to support his family. But instead they went on dangerous mission to Peru together and now there's no way in hell that Noah would ever sell Mirage! Not after they literally fused together to become one! I want them to talk about this! I want Mirage to tell Noah why he kidnapped him that fateful day and then Noah could chime in and be like, "I thought I was going to die, man. Your driving was terrifying!" And then of course Mirage would pretend to be offended, say his piece and humour would ensue and they would both be laughing and having a good time. Gimme a scene like that!

And give me scenes when Decepticons stir up trouble and Mirage jumps to protect Noah fiercely (naturally). And don't be afraid to give us those "Oh shit!" episodes when some type of disaster happens that's like level 3 on the "Disaster Metre", but Noah is still freaking the fuck out because he's scared that Mirage is hurt/dying, but instead he's not. He's totally fine, maybe a few scratches to his paint, but he's not in severe pain or in any pain at all. But Mirage sees his boi freaking out, so he has to gently calm him down before he spirals out of control. Yes, more fluff please!

And also, I really want to see Elena in this show! She is so awesome and needs to be in this show, continuing to bring in the knowledge and her warm heart and kindness. I need to see her interact with the other Autobots and maybe even become close friends with Arcee. I need to see Elena interact with Mirage and hear the funny shit he would say to make her laugh. I NEED THIS! And of course OP, Bumblebee, Wheeljack and other Autobot characters would need to be in the show. Maybe we could even get a few episodes featuring Charlie and Bee sneaking out to see her, or maybe not sneaking out at all.

But also, I would love to see Noah and Mirage moments where Mirage tries to get out of patrol duty and essentially leaves his post to go hang with Noah. Noah would be the "voice of reason", but he will end up caving because he can't bring himself to say no to Mirage. Not after everything they've been through together. I imagine Noah would be struggling with some PTSD and other psychological trauma, so when Mirage goes on patrols or does general Autobot stuff, Noah would worry A LOT. This would lead to fluffy scenes and angst and sweet comfort. I NEED THIS!

Honestly, I just need more Mirage and Noah moments, because these two are awesome and I've just been watching Bumblebee and ROTB back to back on repeat ever since ROTB was released digitally. And now I am forever basking in the sweet glow of this Transformers reboot, that is full of action, adventure, comedy, heart and everything that we've ever wanted to see in a Transformers movie. The amount of kindness and compassion that Charlie showed to Bee is wholesome. And the amount of kindness and compassion that Noah and Elena showed the Autobots and Maximals is also wholesome. This is what being a human companion to giant alien robots should look like!

I don't know the whole creative process and other fine details that would need to be worked out in order to get a show like this on the air, but I really do think that this Transformers reboot needs to start making some post-movie shows to help fill in the gaps and give us additional content to obsess over. It's not uncommon for a movie's success to carry over into a show, so I really think we need a post-ROTB show!

~And I think that's it. For now. 🙂

I almost didn't post this 🙈

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Hiiiii cal!!! I’m so glad you’re enjoying writing this way because I love getting to read these snippets - it’s like a bunch of mini cliffhangers that prompt my imagination to go wild and it’s so much fun!! I’ll be sending emojis for as long as you’re wanting them!

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️(they’re getting a house! And about to get married!!! And i might be misremembering but i don’t think you’ve done a detailed buddie wedding in any of your fics yet? I’m very excited to see how you do it!!)

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨(the shenanigans and tomfoolery of being bad at hiding a secret relationship… it amuses me so!)

🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸(as i’ve said many times before, my love for this fic goes beyond words!! And you’re venturing into truly riveting territory here i’m so pumped!!)

🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮(my heart breaks for babby - my typo for baby bobby and i’m keeping it - my dear sweet babby)

🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟(i can already feel this one becoming my new obsession! Idk why i thought it was going to be something shorter when you first started posting about it but i was thrilled to see that anticipated chapter count on ao3!)

👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑(islands in the stream has been stuck in my head all day and i blame you! I’m so looking forward to the madney sweetness!)

🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼(oh my god cal the angst! It’s angsting!)

💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐(huge fan of mays crush being named april - it makes me giggle every time)

🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮🦮(cranberry my baby! And the covidness of it all is so vivid - i’m loving the buck-chris dynamic!)

I never count the amount of emojis i type as i go so i’m always a bit shocked at how many sentences i’ve requested of you when you post the reply 😬 thank you so much for putting up with my crazy requests it brings me such joy!

I hope you have a lovely weekend and week!!

SO AS I WAS FILLING THIS OUT MY FUCKING LAPTOP CRASHED. WHICH SUCKS BECAUSE IT HAS TAKEN ME HOURS AND HOURS ACROSS TWO DAYS. FUCK. Let's see if I can find the sentences I wrote again.

For TWATYTK and Zombies, those parts have already been posted, because as I said, this was taking so long. GAH!

I had a whole message typed out about how much I appreciate you. You are so kind! IT'S LOST TO TIME NOW.

I think this was what I had for ⚡️:

---

Their next call is to the scene of a fire. 

This should not be especially eventful, considering that they are firefighters and all. And, for the drive there, it isn’t. The transit process? Just fine. 

It’s the rest that sends Buck into a tailspin. 

He spends the ride seated next to Eddie, thighs touching. They’re back being partnered together. Sadie earned her shield a couple months back, and has been working as Ravi’s partner since. Buck is pretty proud of her - and himself, for training her. He liked working with her a lot. But he’s happy to be back where he belongs, in terms of workplace duos. 

Buck and Eddie - okay, mostly Buck - talk everyone’s ear off about the house for the time it takes them to get to the fire. They should possibly be a little less giddy headed towards an actual three alarm fire, but at that point, Buck thinks his mood simply can’t be shaken. How naive. 

It is perhaps due to this focus on the house, which is nowhere near the direction they’re headed in to get to this fire, that Buck doesn’t realize what is in the direction of the fire. In his defense, neither does anyone else! Not even Eddie! Even Bobby, who knows better where they’re going, doesn’t put the pieces together. 

Maybe it’s because they spend so much time driving around the city. Here and there. Fires and car accidents and medical emergencies everywhere. Everywhere looks familiar! They could all be city tour guides. It’s not like driving through a city where you only know a few places, so the places you know feel like beacons.

Or Buck is just making excuses for his lack of attention. Either way. 

Really, it’s not until they turn onto the street that Buck notices. Though, it’s a long road, and they’re still a few miles out. 

“This is weird,” Buck says. 

“What is?” Sadie asks. She’s sitting across from him. Noticing his sudden onslaught of nerves. 

“We’re on the same street as the wedding venue.”’

That makes Eddie look. He’d been typing a rather long message to his mother and not paying much attention to where they’re going. At Buck’s words, his attention snaps to the window.

“Shit, you’re right.” 

Well, obviously Buck knows he’s right. 

“Bobby,” he asks. “What’s the address of where we’re going?”

“Uh, it is…” Bobby reads. “Oh.”

“Oh?” Buck repeats. He grabs Eddie’s arm. “Oh? Oh, what?”

“Okay, well first let’s remember we don’t know how bad it is yet,” Bobby says, maintaining a steady facade. 

“Bobby, it’s a three-alarm fire!” Buck exclaims, voice raising an octave.

“And the wedding is in days,” Eddie adds, voice wavering with stress. “There’s no time to do any repairs, even if it’s not totally ruined.”

Days. Days. What the fuck are they going to do?

“Okay, let’s not jump to any conclusions. Technically, the address is for the building next door,” Bobby explains. “Everything might be fine.”

Everything is not fine. Quite the opposite, in fact. 

Two minutes after his painstaking revelation, Buck finds himself standing next to his fiancé on the street in front of their wedding venues, watching it plume with smoke. The wind blew the flames from the building next to it, and the roof caught. It won’t fare as badly as the other building, but it certainly won’t be available for their wedding. 

They are getting married.

In three days. 

Their wedding is in three days. 

Their wedding is in three days and has no venue. 

Because their venue is burning right in front of him. 

Their venue was also their caterer, so add that to the fucking fire. 

“Buck! Eddie!” Bobby calls. “Work first, react later!”

Easy for him to say! It’s not his wedding venue! 

“Come on.” Eddie tugs on his turnouts. “We’ve got to go.”

Buck feels like he’s been possessed by a heap of barbed wire. 

He turns his head to Eddie. His eyes are bugged out so wide they might pop from his head. An absurd but sticky thought pops into his head. 

“You jinxed us,” Buck accuses. 

“Buck!” Eddie complains.

---

And 🚨:

---

“Okay, that makes sense. Was it his family?”

Buck nods. “They were religious. Conservative. Southern.”

“I can relate,” Eddie tells him. 

“Eventually, I just wanted to be able to relax, though,” Buck says. “I made him promise we’d do it at the end of the tour. Not to his family. Just, to friends… And in public.”

Eddie’s expression softens as he realizes.

“And then he died.”

“Yeah.” 

And then he died. 

“I’m so sorry,” Eddie exhales.

Buck shakes his head. His eyes start to sting. 

“It’s stupid, Eddie. I know there’s no logic behind it. It just feels like once something is out loud, it can be taken away.”

Eddie nods, understanding the thought process. 

“We both know I can’t promise you I won’t spontaneously die,” he says. “Especially in a global pandemic.”

“I know,” Buck nods. 

“But, uh…” Eddie sighs. “It’s like you said when I was worried about Chris, right? I’ll just have to prove it to you.”

“Prove it to me?” Buck asks.

“Yeah,” Eddie nods. “I’ll just prove that we get to have a life together. Even if we’re both a little bit scared of dying.”

“I’m scared of you dying,” Buck reminds him. 

“Okay, well we’re at an equal risk, so… Not the point, actually. Buck, the point is, I’ll show you every day, alright?” Eddie promises. “We get to have this.”

Buck takes a deep breath. He leans forward in bed and grabs Eddie’s hand. 

“I don’t know if I’d believe anyone else,” he says quietly. 

Eddie shuffles up the mattress, closer to Buck.

“Believe me,” he says. 

“Okay,” Buck relents. “But only because you’re very pretty.”

Eddie smirks. “It’s a gift.”

“Mmm, or a trick.”

Eddie chuckles and kisses his temple, right beside the birthmark. 

“I love you,” he says. “That’s not going anywhere, okay?”

“Okay,” Buck breathes. 

He decides to try his best to believe him. 

---

And the 90 sentences I wrote for this damn 🩸:

---

But it does show Buck what she’s up to. 

It kind of makes him mad, actually. Eddie has gone to such intense, devastating lengths to hide himself. Meanwhile, his attacker has been out here, just living life. Posting about walks through the park and her latest baking experiment. How is that fucking fair? 

It’s not. 

It’s not fair. 

And while Buck knows what he has to do isn’t fair either - isn’t right or human or good - he tries to keep that in mind. 

She ruined Eddie’s life. Twice. She didn’t have to do that. Now, what choice does Buck have? 

February 10th, 2025

Eddie does something on Monday that he perhaps should not do. Something the tiniest bit risky. After his call with Adriana, he’s feeling that a bit of risk taking to get his life back where it needs to be is necessary. And anyway, he’s not doing anything illegal. Not doing anything wrong. Nothing he can be arrested for. 

He’s picking his son up from school. 

Chris pauses, exiting Durand School to see Eddie in the driver’s seat of the truck. His eyes widened with nerves for a moment. Eddie felt a rush of guilt. He doesn’t want to make Chris worry. Doesn’t want to cause any undue stress. He just wants to feel like a normal dad again, picking his kid up from school. 

But then Chris breaks out into a wide grin, and Eddie feels his whole body relax. 

“You came!” Chris exclaims, surprised, when he reaches the vehicle. 

Eddie climbs out to help him into the front seat. Not that Chris needs a lot of help anymore. Mostly just someone to hold his crutches and bag. 

“I did,” Eddie confirms. He tries to keep his voice even. 

“You’re not worried?” 

“No,” Eddie says. “Well, maybe a little. But I’m not doing anything I’m not allowed to do.”

Chris thinks about this. “I’m glad you came today.”

“Me too,” Eddie decides. “Do you want to grab ice cream or something on the way home?”

Chris narrows his eyes. “I’m not a little kid, remember?”

“Jeez, I didn’t know ice cream had an age limit,” Eddie frowns. “Buck will be devastated to hear this. You know how seriously he takes his Neapolitan.”

Chris smirks. “Fine. Okay. I want ice cream.”

Eddie grins. “Thought so.”

Fifteen minutes later, they’re sitting on a little patio, under the shade of an umbrella. Eddie is in the darkest seat, also covered by sunglasses and a hat. Chris sits in the sunshine, spooning strawberry ice cream from a little paper bowl. 

“So, I wanted to run an idea by you,” Eddie says. 

“Me?” Chris asks. 

“Yeah, you. Who else?”

“I don’t know,” Chris shrugs. “What is it?”

“Well, I think I need to get a job,” Eddie says. 

“But you can’t be a firefighter,” Chris fills in.

“No,” Eddie says. “I don’t think I can.”

“So, then what?” 

“Well, May suggested I look into telehealth services. Like a hotline for medical advice or something,” Eddie says. 

Chris nods. “You’d be good at that.”

“Thank you,” Eddie replies. “But, uh, I did a little research and I think I found something different that suits me even better.”

“What is it?”

“Well, there’s this nonprofit that operates out of Los Angeles looking for people with medical experience. Nurses. Doctors. Paramedics.” 

“Like a charity?” Chris asks. 

“Yeah, but I’d get paid,” Eddie says. “It’s a job. Bringing emergency medical care to people who maybe don’t feel safe to call for help.” 

“Like… You?” Chris whispers the last part. 

“Yeah, but not just like me,” Eddie explains. “All kinds of people. People facing deportation. Homeless people. People who can’t afford an ambulance ride. Stuff like that.”

---

This is easier to count again haha 🔮:

---

Buck wakes up with his cheek pressed into the bannister support poles of Bobby’s apartment stairwell. He can feel their imprint as he woozily pulls his upper body upright. His head is pounding and he feels vaguely nauseous. Almost like he’s been drugged. Though, the comedown when they’d been spiked with LSD had been far more gradual than the sudden, brutal snap back to reality that had been whatever that was. 

Not a coma, he realizes. If he’s sitting in the stairwell to Bobby’s apartment, not a hospital room, then it wasn’t a coma dream. Kind of an insane regular dream, though? And why had he passed out in the first place?

Acutely aware he won’t find any answers here, parked on his ass, Buck pulls himself to his feet. Slowly, and gripping the bannister for support, just in case, he straightens out his body. His legs give a little wobble. 

What the fuck happened to him?

Partway down the stairs, Buck looks up and down. Should he go out to the Jeep and risk driving home? Feeling like this? He supposes he could call Eddie. Eddie would come for him, no questions asked. He knows he could ask Bobby for help, too. No matter what just happened between them. But his brain is battling two contradictory memories; the fight he had with Bobby in the kitchen and the memory he somehow intruded on of Bobby at his father’s funeral. If that was even real. The easy thing to do would be to go downstairs and call Eddie, not deal with any of it. Hold onto the only thing he knows really happened. 

With a sigh, Buck turns and climbs the stairs. Up towards Bobby’s. 

The moment his foot hits the landing on Bobby’s floor, Buck sees the breathless, similarly disoriented face of his captain jogging down the hallway. He looks pale. Hair a little mussed. Half his face is red, like it’s been pressed against something, too. 

---

A bunch for this guy here 🧟:

---

“May is awake and lucid,” she says. “She’s asking for you.”

Athena grabs one of Hen’s hands and squeezes it. 

“Thank you. Thank you.” 

Then she hurries off in the direction of her daughter’s sickroom. 

Hen doesn’t go after her. She waits, lingering, to speak with Bobby. 

“Did you find Michael?” She asks. 

Bobby shakes his head slightly. 

“It looks like he was infected in the initial outbreak or sometime soon after.”

Hen’s shoulder sag. “Damn it. Poor Athena. Poor kids.” 

Bobby nods. He doesn’t know what else to say. Yes. It’s horrendous. Everything is always so horrendous and everyone’s families are always dying. 

“We should ask her to stay,” Hen says quietly. “She’s a friend. We trust her. The kids will be good for Denny.”

Bobby knows they have enough food to stretch to more than just the three of them. Plus, more hands means more potential to harvest more. Fish more. Preserve more. 

“It’s not just my decision,” Bobby says. “We’ll have to discuss it as a group.”

“No, but it’ll go whatever way you want it to go,” Hen says. “You know that.”

He does. 

“I think it’s a good idea, Hen. But I want everyone’s input.” 

“Like you did with the radio?” She asks.

Bobby raises his eyebrows in surprise. “Buck told you?”

“Oh, yes.” She says. “Wanted to get ahead of it, I guess.”

“Do you think I did the wrong thing?” Bobby asks. 

Hen might be the only person he’s willing to ask this of. The only person whose answer he really wants to know. 

“No,” she says. “I don’t think you did the wrong thing. But I’m worried about him anyway.”

“Me too, Hen.” Bobby admits.

He’s always worried about Buck. All the time. Every minute. Even when Buck hasn’t done anything deserving of Buck’s worry. 

One day, Buck is going to finally let himself realize they’re all dead. Maddie. Abby. Every person he knew and loved before this. He’ll realize they’re all gone. And Bobby worries, every moment, that it will destroy him. He worries he won’t find a reason to keep pushing forward.

---

A few here 👑:

---

Chim finally gets a chance to talk to Hen about it, privately, somewhere around four in the morning. They’re in the ambulance, driving back from yet another party gone wrong that resulted in a hospital transport. At least this time no one puked. Just a badly broken ankle from a drunken trampoline adventure. 

“So you forgot to get her number,” Hen says. “Can’t you go back?”

“Stroll up to a gated mansion tomorrow and say, ‘hi, I’m the guy who kissed your daughter while you were trying to set her up with rich hedge fund types?’ I don’t think so, Hen.”

“She’s probably trying to find your information, too,” Hen tries. 

“I hope,” Chim grumbles. 

“And, hey, you’re very findable on social media,” Hen adds. “She won’t have trouble.”

“Should I message her brother?” Chim asks. “Is that crazy? He was nice!”

“Mmm, maybe wait until you’ve slept for all forms of communication,” Hen advises. “She knows you’re at work, anyway. She won’t be expecting to hear from you.”

“Right. Right. You’re so smart. Why are you so smart?”

“I had a nap in the bunk room while you were at the party.”

Damn. Yeah. A nap would make him sharper. 

“So, it’s just a waiting game for now,” Chim sighs. This is not helping with the resounding feeling that he may, in fact, be a complete fool.

“I think so,” Hen agrees. “Sorry, Chim.”

👑👑👑

By some stroke of fate, he’s not waiting very long. 

When they park the ambulance in the engine bay and climb out, sore and tired, Chim is met with the sound of a strangely familiar voice. One he thinks he may just be hallucinating. 

“You’re the captain? That’s so cool!” He hears. “That means you’ve been doing this forever, right? You know a lot about it?”

---

OKAY BACK TO OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAMMING! THAT IS WHERE MY LAPTOP ABANDONED ME.

30 for 🔼:

---

She accepts the cards she’s been dealt, just like last time. After all, didn’t she shuffle the deck?

She sees her son as much as she can. She goes back to her office admin job as soon as she’s able. She misses Eddie’s shield ceremony. His request. She avoids his parents while they’re in town altogether. Her choice. 

Other than coworkers, she really has no adults to see. Compounded with that, she and Eddie have made the decision not to tell family - even Christopher - until her second trimester. So Shannon finds herself existing in this strange vacuum of silence. Again, one of her own making. But difficult to navigate nonetheless. 

That changes about seven weeks after her accident. Completely unintentionally, she might add. 

None of it was ever a plan in her head. 

She’s been seeing a physical therapist for her shoulder. Her ankle has healed on an intended timeline, not causing her much additional trouble. Her shoulder, on the other hand, has been a source of difficulty. Perhaps with everything else changing in her body, it can’t quite figure itself out. It wouldn’t be the only thing. 

She’s thirteen weeks along now. Almost at that second trimester mark. Almost at the point where not only will they be able to tell people, but they’ll have to. Namely their son. She’s not really showing per say, but she certainly feels bigger and tighter. Her chest is another matter entirely. 

So, to paint the picture, there she is; thirteen weeks pregnant with a man whose trust she shattered, shoulder hardly functional, sitting in the waiting room of her physical therapist in loose sweats and her baggiest tee shirt because nothing fits her boobs properly anymore, and who walks in? Or hobbles in, rather? Her soon-to-be-ex-husband’s best friend. 

---

33 for 💐 (YEAH THANKS I THOUGHT APRIL WAS FUNNY):

---

She orders a wine spritzer. April orders a cider. They sit in a corner booth and for a good few minutes, it’s awkward as hell. Neither of them really seems to know where to start. Which makes sense, because they didn’t exactly have any solid communication foundations to begin with. May is reminded, strangely, of the time Sue left her and Claudette to sort out their issues in the quiet room, right before the fire at Dispatch. Not that she thinks this will end the same way, obviously. 

“Listen,” May starts after the server brings them their drinks. “I’m sorry if I misunderstood things. I really got the sense you didn’t like me.”

April frowns. “I’m not sure how, honestly. I was trying pretty hard to get to know you.” 

“I think I definitely, uh, read things wrong,” May admits. “I’m definitely… Confused about things. But, come on, April. You have to admit, you were acting super competitive with me in class.”

Her brows furrow, hazel eyes giving the impression she’s sifting through memories. 

“Was I that bad?” She asks. 

“Yes,” May insists. “You disagree with everything I say. You compete over grades. When you did better than me on the criminology midterm exam, you literally said April always comes before May.” 

April’s cheeks redden. 

“Oh my god,” she mumbles.

“You did say it!” May reiterates. 

“No, I know,” April says. “I’m sorry, I just… God, it’s stupid. You thought I was serious?”

“Well, yeah?” 

April takes a long sip of her cider.

---

45 for darling Cranberry! 🦮:

---

Cranberry brings Chris the ball, pressing it eagerly into his hand. 

“Ew, so much slobber,” Chris complains, wiping his hand on his pants. Luckily, laundry day is tomorrow. 

“Well, you’re the one who keeps throwing it for her,” Buck says. He’s just been snapping photos to send to Eddie. 

“Gross, Cran,” Chris chides, and throws the ball again, a little absentmindedly. This time, the ball goes high. Higher than Buck would have liked. And at an awkward angle.

Cranberry twists her body as she jumps, catching the ball midair. When she comes back down, she fumbles, front left paw hitting the ground hard and buckling under her. She yelps and stumbles forward. 

“Cranberry!” Chris shrieks. 

Buck lurches forward to where they’re playing, straining his leg. 

Cranberry stands and stumbles a little again. She lifts her injured paw, favoring it. Tail tucked between her leg, she limps towards Buck, seeking comfort.

Buck lowers himself down as quickly as he can manage to examine her. 

“Are you okay, baby?” He asks. 

“Did she break her leg?” Christopher asks, bottom lip trembling.

Buck lifts Cranberry’s injured leg. It doesn’t look broken. He flexes it. Her elbow and shoulder move without resistance, but she fights him when he tries to straighten her wrist. It can move, it just hurts her. 

“Is she okay?” Chris asks again. 

Buck feels a pang of annoyance. 

“This is why I asked you not to throw it too high,” he grits out. 

Tears spill out from the boy’s eyes. 

“I-I’m sorry, Buck.” He blubbers. “I didn’t mean to hurt her!”

Buck clenches his jaw. He feels unreasonably angry and panicked. If Christopher had just listened this wouldn’t have happened. 

“I know it was an accident,” Buck manages. 

“I’m sorry, Cranberry,” Chris cries. He takes his glasses off to wipe his eyes. 

“I think it’s just twisted,” Buck says. “I’m going to bring her inside and call the vet to see if she needs to get checked out. Okay?”

[bijouxcarys]

𝑻𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑩𝒊𝒏𝒅 (𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝑹𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒏𝒔 𝒙 𝑶𝑪) - 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝑻𝒘𝒐

Masterlist

Character Profiles/Face Claims

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A/N: I can't say I'm overly happy with this chapter, but I rewrote it a gazillion times. I hope it's okay, and it's a good healthy dose of The Bloodline in their natural habitats lol. Also, I would just like to thank everyone for the support on the first chapter. Makes me feel all mushy inside gah. <3

Tags: @trippinsorrows @empressdede @thetribalqueen @heauxvibez @bigsimperika

@cyberdejos2 @keyaho @headoftheetable @jstarr86 @southerngirl41

@tshepisho @cry1nwhileimcumm1n @maeb99 @thedesireds @dzdndcnfsd

@expert-texpert @niknakbucks92 @sillyteecup

(let me know if you want to be tagged in future Roman fics)

Some may call it a mansion. To Roman, it was simply home. He never understood why having a large house, albeit accommodating necessary facilities, constituted being pompous. When he first bought the house, he knew his family would be joining him, so why not go all out? A gym, a shooting range, a pool… it had everything he needed to continue being the Head of the Table.

He pushed open the heavy mahogany doors, the familiar creak announcing their arrival. The grandeur was unmistakable—high ceilings, oak chandeliers, adorned walls with art he’d brought with him from the family’s storage unit back in Florida.

The twins flanked Roman, their almost identical features set in pure fatigue, as their younger brother brought up the rear. Jimmy dropped his tie and jacket onto the marble-tiled floor. “Man, I thought that shit would never end.”

Jey followed suit, collapsing onto a plush leather couch once the group entered the living space. “Tell me about it. These events are always the same, just a bunch of wannabes tryna impress.”

Roman loosened his tie, heading straight for the bar that lined the back of the room. “Yeah, but it’s necessary. We gotta show face, let ‘em know we still run things.”

Jey glanced at Jimmy with a raised eyebrow, before turning his head to look back at his cousin. “We ain’t run shit tonight. You see the Russians were there? They run this shit, Uce.”

“For now,” Solo added, wandering over to one of the windows that overlooked the sprawling greenery of the estate’s garden.

“Whatchu talkin’ ‘bout “for now”, man, they shady as fuck,” Jey insisted with a small “pshh,” throwing his hands up. “I don’t trust ‘em, never have, never will.”

“Nah, Solo’s right,” Roman pointed out, pouring himself a glass of whiskey. “They can’t be in charge forever. Besides…” he took a sip, the amber liquid burning his throat in a familiar, comforting way, “Their family ain’t as big as it used to be. If anythin’, we got numbers. But right now, we ain’t got a problem with ‘em.”

“And that means they ain’t got a problem with us? C’mon, man–”

“Jey,” Roman interrupted, lowering his glass and veering over to where his cousins lounged. “There’s no problem between us and the Volkovs right now. And I intend to keep it that way.” His words were carefully emphasised, dropping the lax cadence for one of assertion. “So if you don’t mind,” he loosened the tension in his shoulders, rolling them once, “I’m gonna go call my babygirl.”

“Ah, tell her I said hi,” Jimmy quickly got in before Roman could leave for the staircase.

“And me!” Jey leaned over the back of the couch.

Roman sighed lightly, turning on his heel to look at the twins, and then over at Solo, who still has his gaze fixated outside.

“Him too,” Jey spoke for Solo, the latter sending him a sideways glance and eventually looking at Roman with a small nod of confirmation.

“It’s like livin’ with a bunch of kids, seriously…” Roman muttered as he turned and headed upstairs to his office, all whilst hearing the usual discourse from Jey about being hungry and neglecting to ask if anyone else wanted something as he strolled off into the kitchen.

Once the door to his office was shut, Roman took a moment to take a deep breath, closing his eyes, and letting it all back out, feeling every ounce of strain leave his body in the process. Hey, he needed it to make room for the other strain in his life to take its place.

He pulled out his phone and checked the time—just early enough to risk a call without Maria causing a fuss.

So, he dialled the number he so wished didn’t have such an important place in his seemingly endless list of contacts, hoping the only person he wanted to talk to was still awake. And that he didn’t need to have a ridiculous back and forth with the owner of said number.

Thankfully, Maria must have known the reason for Roman’s call, so when the FaceTime ringtone cut out, it was replaced with a small, sleepy voice. “Daddy?”

Roman’s face softened instantly, a rare smile spreading across his lips. “Hey, Princess. You still up?”

Ava nodded, her eyes heavy and on the verge of unintentionally closing. “I wanted to wait for you to come home.”

“I’m here now, baby… How was your day?” Roman asked, settling into an armchair.

“It was okay. Mommy let me watch a movie, but I missed you…”

“I missed you too, sweetheart.” Roman felt his heart aching with the guilt he possessed for not always being there to see his daughter enjoy her childhood. “I’ll see you soon, I promise.”

Ava’s face brightened the best it could in her sleepiness, yawning as she spoke the words Roman could never get enough of. “I love you, Daddy.”

“I love you more, Ava. And so does your Uncle Jimmy. And Jey. And Solo. You are loved so much, Princess, and don’t you ever forget it.”

It was impossible to miss Ava’s subtle glance to the side, signalling that she wasn’t alone.

“Mommy wants me to go to bed now, Daddy.”

“She’s right, baby. Can’t be havin’ you all tired at school tomorrow, can we?”

“No,” Ava replied with a small, but sad smile.

“You get some sleep now… And pass the phone to Mommy for me, baby.”

“Okay… Goodnight, Daddy.”

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

There was a lot of shuffling on the other end, and for a moment a black screen as Ava passed the phone back to Maria. Roman’s features were already hardening again, knowing what was coming next. It was almost instantly that his stomach twisted in disdain once the face of his ex-wife appeared on the screen. She was retreating from Ava’s bedroom to find a place that didn’t disturb the 6-year-old.

“Roman,” Maria’s voice was cool and clipped.

“Maria,” Roman replied, trying to keep his tone neutral. “We need to talk about Ava.”

“Oh, now you wanna talk about her? Convenient.”

Roman rubbed at his temples, already feeling the headache coming on. “Maria, this isn’t about us. It’s about our daughter.”

“Is it? Because it feels like you’re trying to undermine my parenting every chance you get.”

“I’m not undermining shit, I just want to be more involved.”

“Well, flying off to meetings and dealing with your ‘business’ isn’t exactly father of the year material.”

“Don’t start this crap, Maria, you know I’m doin’ my best.”

“Your best? Your best would be staying out of trouble and being there for her.”

Roman’s jaw tightened. “I am there for her. You’re the one makin’ it difficult.”

“Oh, please, spare me the victim routine, Reigns. You’ve never been there when it counted.”

“That’s not fair,” Roman snapped, his patience wearing thin. “I’ve always done what I could.”

“What you could? Roman, what you could was never enough. You’re too wrapped up in your own world to see what’s right in front of you!”

He closed his eyes, trying to rein in his temper. “And I’m trying to change that. I want to be better for my babygirl.”

“Then let’s start by respecting the fact that she needs stability. Not the chaos that follows you everywhere.”

“I am stable, Maria. My life, my work—it’s all under control.”

“Is it? ‘Cause from where I’m standing, it looks like a fucking mess.”

Roman gripped the arm of the chair, his knuckles whitening. “You don’t know what the fuck you’re talkin’ ‘bout.”

“Aw, don’t I? I lived that life with you, stronzo, I know exactly what’s going on.”

Hell, here come the Italian insults…

“Then you should already know that I’m doin’ everythin’ I can to keep that little girl safe! Damn.”

“Actions speak louder than words. And your actions? They’re not convincing anyone. Least of all me. So,” her voice switched to a sickly, patronising sweetness, “If you want to continue seeing your “babygirl,” you’ll get your head outta your ass and do something about it. We could start by respecting the mother of your child, how ‘bout that one?”

“Respecting the mother of my child?” Roman repeated sarcastically. “I do respect you, but respect goes both ways. You gotta respect that I’m her father and I want to be in her life.”

“Oh, really? Is that what you call it?” Maria snapped back, her eyes narrowing on the screen. “All you do is throw money at her and expect that to make up for your absence. She needs a father, not a fucking ATM.”

“I’m more than that, and you know it. I’m tryin’, Maria. But you make it impossible. You twist everything I do into something negative.”

Maria let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. “You think this is about me twisting things? Nah, this is about you being a shitty father. You’re never there. You’re too busy playing the big shot, running your little empire, while Ava is left wondering why her daddy doesn’t care enough to be there.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it!” Roman’s voice rose. “I love Ava more than anything. I’m doin’ all this for her. To make sure she has everything she needs!”

“Love? You call this love?” Maria shot back, her voice icy. “Love is being there, showing up, and not just when it’s convenient for you. You think you can just waltz in and out of her life as you please, and everything will be fine?”

“I fuckin’ balancing shit! Work, responsibilities, bein’ a father—this shit ain’t a fuckin’ walk in the park!”

“Oh, poor you,” Maria sneered in contempt. “Must be so hard, being the big boss. But guess what, Roman? Ava doesn’t care about your business. She cares about her daddy. The daddy that keeps letting her down. You think a few phone calls and visits are enough to make up for all the times you weren’t there? Buying her love? Doesn’t work.”

“I know that,” he replied, softly and with a tinge of desperation. “And I told you I’m doin’ everything I can to make it work.”

“No, you’re doing everything you can to make yourself feel better. To ease your guilt. But it’s not about you, it’s about Ava. Until you realise that, you’re never going to be the father she needs.”

“I ain’t givin’ up on that girl, Maria, you can believe that. You can’t keep using her to punish me.”

Maria’s eyes flashed with anger. “Punish you? This isn’t about punishing you, you narcissistic asshole. I’m protecting my daughter from her father and his dangerous life. I’m giving her stability, which is something you will never be able to provide.”

Roman was tempted to just end the call and carry on with his night. His ex-wife’s voice ran straight through him like an airhorn. There was a reason he couldn’t stand the woman to begin with, and that was it. He just didn’t realise how fucking psychotic she’d end up being, and that the voice was just the tip of the iceberg.

“You think I’m dangerous?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’re the one filling her head with lies, turning her against me every chance you get.”

“Lies?! The only lies here are the ones you tell yourself. That you’re a good father, that you’ll be there for her, that she’s the only thing that matters… You’re pathetic, Roman…”

Rolling his eyes, he had no choice but to take in insult after insult. Who knew what she’d do if he did just hang up on her? It would just add ammunition to her already extensive list of why he was no good as a dad. Or a man, for that matter.

“You either need to cut the crap, or stay out of her life for good so I can find someone who’s more of a man, more of a father, than you.”

“You ain’t bringin’ no man around my little girl, tu puttana,” Roman growled, jaw tight and nose flared as he sat forward, bringing his face closer to the screen. 

“Or what?” Maria smirked. “You gonna send Dumb and Dumber to take him out? You gonna send some other poor, sad subject to take a little girl’s daddy away? Better yet, you gonna come up here yourself? Is that what it’s gonna take, Roman? You’d rather show up to kill someone than to see your child.” She scoffed. “Don’t think for a second I won’t reverse that shared custody bullshit that we don’t use anyway. And don’t think for a second… that I can’t keep her from you. One word from me to CPS, and she’s mine.”

Okay, this bitch had stooped low before. But this? This was a whole other level of fucked up that even she hadn’t reached in the years he’d known her. She’d attacked his character, his business, his past, his present, his family—fuck, she even went as far as criticising him in bed. When she fully knew a single night with him made any bitch wobbly for the next few days.

This? A threat born of pure, unbridled hatred and malice, to legally stop him from seeing his own flesh and blood? Nothing cut him deeper.

But what was he to do? Return the threat? Give her a valid reason to complain to CPS, or the fucking authorities? She fucking wished.

Well, at least he had the authorities in New York right in the palm of his hand. He could handle that. Florida was a whole other ball game.

“This conversation isn’t going anywhere, Maria, I think you should hang up now, don’t you?” Roman forced himself to calmly request, his knee bouncing up and down from the agitation. And the smile on this woman’s face did nothing to help; the smile that indicated her arrogance. The sheer knowledge that she was in charge of this dynamic. She held the power over him when it came to Ava, and it would take a miracle to have that change.

“I’m inclined to agree. Sort your shit out. Goodbye, Roman.”

The call ended abruptly, leaving Roman staring at the blank screen. He lowered his head into his hand, rubbing at his temples once again. He knew Maria was right, to some extent. Of course, his line of work meant he wasn’t around as much as he would have liked to be, or should have been. But it was never as simple as she made it out to be.

It seemed the longer he stayed in his office, the more the conversation replayed in his mind, every word cutting deeper each time. He needed to figure this out. He needed some kind of balance. Or risk losing Ava. 

He needed to vent, to get all this pent-up anger out before it completely consumed him to the point of no return. With a deep sigh, he stood up, stretching out his back and rolling his head both ways to release some of the tension.

Figuring some shit-talking and mild relaxation would distract him enough, he made his way back downstairs and to the living room, where Jimmy and Solo were still lounging around, looking up as he entered.

“You good, Uce?” Jimmy asked, a wary look in his eyes.

“Just had a call with the she-devil,” Roman bitterly replied, snarling slightly. “Doin’ her usual routine. Tryna make me feel like shit for not bein’ there enough.”

Jimmy shook his head, leaning back on the couch. “She’s always got somethin’ to say, huh? You’re doin’ your best, man, don’t let her get to you.”

“Yeah, well, it’s hard not to when she’s constantly using an innocent 6-year-old to get what she wants,” Roman huffed, grabbing a glass to pour himself another drink. “Actin’ like I’m the worst father in the world.”

“Ay, man, that ain’t true,” Solo chimed in, looking over his shoulder. “You know Ava loves you.”

“I just hate that she knows exactly how to push my buttons.” He swigged back the entirety of his amber liquid at once.

“Of course she does,” Jimmy said with a smirk. “She’s your ex for a reason. Knows all your weak spots.”

Roman couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “Yeah, and she ain’t afraid to use ‘em, either.”

The three of them fell into a comfortable silence for a moment, the weight of the conversation still hanging in the air. Roman took another sip of his drink, letting the alcohol soothe his frayed nerves.

“So, we got the drop-off with The Judgement Day tomorrow,” Jimmy said, shifting the conversation. “We need to be on our A-game.”

“Yeah, we can’t afford any mistakes,” Roman agreed, settling himself into one of the chairs, reclining back and staring up at the ceiling. “It’s a big score for us. We need to be rested and alert.”

“We got this,” Solo affirmed with a nod. “We’ve handled worse.”

The Head of the Table nodded, feeling a sense of camaraderie with his cousins. They had been through a lot together, and he trusted them with his life.

Just then, Jey entered, his usual swagger in place. “Whassup, fellas? What’d I miss?”

“Just talkin’ about the drop-off tomorrow,” Jimmy replied, motioning for Jey to join them. “And Roman’s usual bullshit with Maria.”

Jey rolled his eyes with a loud groan as he plopped down on the couch next to Jimmy. “Man, she’s always gotta be causing trouble, huh?”

“Tell me about it,” Roman muttered, shaking his head. “Anyway…” he trailed off, trying to come up with something to talk about that wasn’t overly depressing as fuck. “That event, huh? That was some, uh…”

“White people shit,” Jey finished his sentence.

“Ay, I’m not sure you’d class the Russians as white, Uce, they’re Asian,” Jimmy leaned back, sending his brother a pointed look.

Roman raised an eyebrow, pulling his head up to look at Jimmy. But Jey took the words right out of his mouth before he could think about uttering them.

“Nah, they ain’t Asian, man, what the fuck?”

“They ain’t Asian?”

“European, right?” Solo joined in.

“Imma squash this right now,” Jimmy straightened his posture, looking straight ahead of him. “Russia borders with Asia, so they Asian!” He emphasised each point with exaggerated hand movements.

“Bitch, they also border fuckin’ Europe. What’s the matter witchu, man?” Jey swatted the back of Jey’s head.

“Oh, okay then, let’s ask our Tribal Chief over here,” Jimmy clapped, gesturing over at Roman.

“What do I look like, your fuckin’ geography teacher or somethin’? The fuck outta here, man…” Roman shook his head, scrunching up his eyebrows.

“You got a phone, use it, and shut up,” Jimmy pointed to the phone sitting in Jey’s lap. “Find out where fuckin’ Russia is.”

Roman snickered, running his hands over his face. “Either way, tone down the shit-talkin’ on the Russians, ‘kay? I told your ass we ain’t got a problem with ‘em. They could be fuckin’ blue for all I care, we good with ‘em right now.”

“Uh, I have been meaning to ask you, Uce,” Jey started as he typed away into Google. “That blonde you were with tonight. That tan was fake, right?”

“Very.” Roman didn’t even hesitate the response. He’d hit the nail on the head.

“She was somethin’ else, though, fake tan or not.”

Roman laughed, the tension finally starting to ease within. “She was a piece of work, just a way to kill time. Nothin’ serious about her.”

“She didn’t seem like the nicest person, not gonna lie,” Solo commented, watching Jey’s phone as he did.

“She’s not,” Roman admitted, stretching his legs out and resting his hands in his lap. “Clingy as hell and fake as they come. But she was free tonight, so I figured why not?”

Jimmy chuckled, shaking his head. “Man, you always attract the crazies.”

“It’s a gift,” Roman replied with a smirk. “But seriously, she’s just a distraction. Nothin’ more.”

“Ay, as long as you can handle ‘em in bed, am I right, Uce?” Jey peered up from his phone.

“Damn straight,” his smirk turned into a full grin. “It’s about knowin’ what they want and how to give it to ‘em… You make ‘em feel real good, they be runnin’ back for more.”

Jimmy cackled. “Oh, we goin’ there tonight?”

“It’s both!” Jey shouted, lifting up his phone as if everyone could read what the hell was on the screen.

“The fuck you talking bout, man?” Roman asked in exasperation.

“Russia is technically in both Europe and Asia…” Jey trailed off. The other three just sat there staring at him, waiting for him to say something else. “Anyway, tell us how you nail a bitch, Chief,” he casually continued, tossing his phone onto the coffee table.

“I swear, you gotta get checked out, Uce, somethin’ ain’t right up there,” Jimmy mumbled.

“Now that we’ve established where everything is in the world, do you wanna hear what I have to say or not?” Roman asked, a knowing smirk on his face. Yeah, his cousins were fully grown men, but man… when it came to experience, nobody could even touch the Head of the Table.

Jimmy leaned forward, clearly more interested in this topic than the topic of where the hell Russia is. “Alright, hit us wit’ it.”

Looking down at his lap, Roman teased the moment, reigning in all the knowledge he’d gathered over the years. He loved the silent tension. Loved making people wait. Which led him to step one.

“You gotta be confident,” he started. “Women can smell insecurity a mile away. When you with her, make sure she knows you in control. Lead, don’t follow.”

Jey nodded, clearly taking mental notes.

“Pay attention to her reactions,” Roman continued. “When you’re kissin’ her, touchin’ her, whatever… Watch how she responds. If she likes somethin’, then you keep on doin’ it. If she doesn’t, switch it up.” He breathed in, momentarily remembering the night he shared with Ms Fake Tan the other week. Running a hand over his beard. “It’s all about readin’ her body.”

Up until now, Solo had been quietly listening, as he did with most things. “What about the actual thing? You got a go-to move, Uce?”

Chuckling, Roman leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “It ain’t about havin’ a go-to move, Solo. It’s about variety. You can’t keep doin’ the same thing every night, over and over again. Keep it fresh, keep it exciting. Surprise her.”

Jimmy grinned ear to ear like a schoolboy, enjoying the conversation. “Man, I remember the first time I switched things up with Trin—she was all about that shit.”

“Exactly,” Roman drawled, fist-bumping his cousin. “Keep ‘em on their toes. Make ‘em want more… That’s how you keep ‘em hooked.”

Jey leaned back, a satisfied look on his face. “Man, I need to find me a girl who appreciates that. Most of the ones I’ve been with just want the flashy stuff.”

“They’re out there,” Solo added. “You just gotta look in the right places.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jey waved him off. “Easier said than done.”

As the night wore on, they eventually started to wind down, the weight of tomorrow’s task looming over them

“We should get some sleep,” Roman declared, standing up with a small grunt and stretching. “We need to be sharp for tomorrow.”

“Yeah, you right,” Jimmy agreed, following suit. “We’ll handle it, Uce. Don’t worry.”

“I know we will,” he clapped Jimmy on the shoulder. “G’night, guys. Get some rest.”

“Night, Chief,” Jey bid him a goodbye, exchanging fist bumps. “We got this shit.”

[nightghoul381]

Dead or Love ~ Ellis Twilight

This a fan translation so it is definitely not 100% accurate. I do not own anything related to Ikemen Villains. Support Cybird by buying their amazing stories!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Bitter End | Premium End | Epilogue

Ellis: “Kate, what kind of Christmases have you had so far?”

While having tea in a café as the Christmas season approaches, Ellis, sitting in front of me, tilts his head.

I couldn’t help but smile at the light steam coming from the hot chocolate that Ellis was drinking.

Kate: “I was usually working, Christmas is especially busy with the deliveries.”

Ellis: “Oh, Christmas cards?”

Kate: “Fufu, correct.”

Ellis: “So, I guess you had a busy Christmas at work.”

Kate: “But it wasn’t all bad, was it?”

Kate: “I felt like Santa Claus because I got to see the happy faces when I delivered the Christmas cards.”

(Now I feel a little nostalgic for those days)

As I trace the memories of the Holy Night with my fingertips and immersed myself in a nostalgic feeling, Ellis murmured.

Ellis: “I want to be your Santa Claus this year.”

Kate: “Eh…?”

Ellis: “I want to give you a very special, very happy Christmas.”

Ellis: “…no good?”

Kate: “Well, in that case, I’ll join you too—”

Ellis: “That’s not allowed.”

Kate: “Why?”

Ellis: “Because Santa Claus doesn’t ask for anything in return, right?”

I imagine Santa Claus walking around, handing out presents without asking for anything in return.

Kate: “Ah…sure?”

Ellis: “Fufu, right? That’s why you’re not allowed to return the favor.”

(I’m sure Ellis is trying to give me some wonderful Christmas memories.)

Although, I am a little reluctant to keep his indiscriminate kindness he gives me to myself.

Kate: “If it’s okay with you, Ellis, I’m happy to do it.”

Ellis: “…I did it. I’ll do my best to make you happy.

--Secret Room- Ellis’ POV—

Ellis: “…What is the best Christmas?”

Ellis: “What do you think is the best Christmas, Jude?”

Jude: “Aah? I don’t know anything about that.”

As I looked at Jude, who was working on paperwork, I heard an annoyed sigh.

Jude: “Hah… annoying to be so deep in thought.”

Jude: “People don’t go out of their way to pay a lot of money to eat in a high-end place for nothing. I don’t know.”

Ellis: “High-end. Why?”

Jude: “Ha. It’s a childish Christmas only blue-eyed brats like you would enjoy.”

Ellis: “I see. Yeah, maybe so.”

Jude: “More importantly, Christmas Eve is—”

Ellis: “A conviction for illicit exports, right?”

Ellis: “Ah, it’s not a crown mission, so I guess it's a punishment."

According to Jude, the organization refines and sells dangerous drugs.

Apparently, they were working carefully behind the scenes so that Jude’s company would be looked upon with suspicion if something were to happen.

Ellis: “I know the loss is only a few thousand pounds. Do you want me to kill? Not kill?

Jude: “They were targeting women and children with those drugs, it’s just so shitty it’s not even funny.”

Ellis: “Kill, you mean… got it.”

And then it was Christmas Eve, December 24th.

Jude and I went into the mansion where the organization was eating.

Jude: “Sorry to disturb you while you’re eating.”

Head of Organization: “Jude Jazza…”

Jude: “Ha, that looks like an expensive wine. You seem to be having a lot of fun.”

Jude steps up onto the table with bare feet and puts his toes on the chin of the man who seems to be the head of the organization.

Jude: “Are you saying that the person who tried to pin the blame on my company had no knowledge of the law?”

Head of Organization: “N-No…”

Jude: “Heh…?”

Jude: “—No, of course not, you fucking idiot.”

Head of Organization: “AAAAAHHHHH!!!”

There was the sound of a jaw being crushed, and the throats of the people around them rang out in fear.

Jude: “Your disgusting screams are hurting my ears. Ellis.”

Bottom of the Organization: “I-I’m sorry…Aah!”

Organization member 1: “Don’t run away you guys! It’s only two people, kill them…!”

Ellis: “…If you can kill me, good luck.”

Organization member 1: “Gah!”

One by one, I thrust a knife into them and take their lives.

While I think about these people not being able to have a Christmas,

Someone touched my leg--.

(…!)

The movement was delayed for a moment.

Organization member 2: “Aah!”

When I killed the last one, all I could hear was me and Jude breathing.

I felt something strange on my leg and looked down…

(Ah…)

Jude: “What?”

Ellis: “Looks like I’ve got a bomb attached to me.”

Perhaps it was a dying struggle, but the person I had just killed seemed to have touched my leg to set off a bomb.

(24 hours left? Oh, it’s a time bomb.)

(…but)

Ellis: “I guess there’s no one left to tell us how to disarm it.”

Ellis: “…What should I do?”

Jude: “Ha. I don’t know, wipe your own ass.”

(I usually do that, but tomorrow…)

--Flashback—

Kate: “If it’s okay with you, Ellis, I’m happy to do it.”

--End Flashback—

Ellis: “Jude, I have a favor to ask of you.”

Jude: “Yeah?”

--Crown Castle—Kate POV

Then, just as the cold of winter was getting stronger, December 25th—Christmas arrived.

I promised to meet Ellis in the town around the time the sun sets.

(My work is finished, so I have to start preparing now.)

Then, there was a knock at the door and a maid delivered a large box.

(…I wonder what?)

When I opened the box, inside was a long, light purple dress.

And a message card was attached to it.

Merry Christmas, Kate.

It’s a present from Santa Claus.

(This is from Ellis…)

(I had no idea you had prepared such a present for me.)

The unexpected Christmas present makes my heart feel fluffy and sweet like cotton candy.

It’s like it’s a preview of the best Christmas yet to come.

(I need to quickly change my clothes and hurry to Ellis.)

I felt as excited as a child receiving a present from Santa Claus.

I change into the dress and head to the meeting place.

(Wow…!)

London is decorated with Christmas colors and welcomes me with an even more gorgeous look.

(The meeting place was supposed to be here…)

Ellis: “Beautiful lady over there. Are you meeting someone…?”

Part 1 | Part 2 | Bitter End | Premium End | Epilogue

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

i love your monster au so much!!

pls consider the twst charas reacting to yuu cracking their joints and being like

"did you... just break your bones.....?" or "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU OKAY??????"

or or them reacting to yuu telling them how dangerous human bites are like,,,

"did u know human bites are the second most dangerous animal bite?? (after mosquitos!) because of the amount of bacteria they carry? yeah lol sometimes ppl who get bitten (mostly by children) have to get that limb AMPUTATED bc of infection :))"

"what........ the. fuck???"

these have probably been mentioned before, but i'd love to see you elaborate or share your thoughts on them! it's not a request, but you can write something about it if you want to! :) <3

Technically the human bite one was touched up on in this ask here, but as for the other one...

It’s amazing how—despite the fact that cracking joints is healthy for us when we’re out of sorts—there are so many people who are shocked or recoil when they hear someone seemingly crack and pop every single joint in our body. XD

Humans are weird even to themselves, let alone to monsters who know next to nothing about us hoomans. :V So let’s take an extra crinkly Yuu and toss them in amongst these monsters, shall we?

////-------------////

It was another normal day at NRC, the sunlight streaming in through the clean windows of the freshly renovated Ramshackle Dorm. Stirred from their slumber, Yuu slowly sat up—minding Grim as the chimera continued snoozing beside them—and yawned. Despite the bed being comfortable, they still woke up stiff and tense. Without a second thought, they put a hand to their chin and—

K-r-r-ack!!

“Mrah!?” Grim yowled as he jumped, staring at Yuu in horror as they repeated the process on the other side and earned more pops and cracks. “What the heck was that?! Are you okay!?”

“Mornin’ Grim,” Yuu greeted, stifling a yawn before twisting their back—earning a multitude of creaks and pops. “Just slept a little funny last night and woke up stiff, so I’m getting the kinks out.”

Kk-krk-krk-pop!

“Okay, I’m ready!” Hopping out of bed, they started getting ready and asked, “So what do you want for breakfast today?”

“…I think I lost my appetite,” Grim uttered.

“Okay, breakfast sandwich to go it is, then.”

///

Krk-kk-k-kh!

“Gah! Yuu, what the hell?!”

“Are you okay?!”

“Human! Are you injured?!”

“Wot the hell?!”

“Urk!?”

“Can’t the Great Grim eat his breakfast sandwich in peace?!”

“Sorry guys! I just woke up really stiff this morning and needed to stretch.”

Ace looked at them in horror as he said, “Are you kidding me? Everyone thought you broke your arms and legs with all that cracking you did at PE this morning! How can you still be making more noise?”

“What? I was just loosening up a few joints with some stretches so I could keep up with everyone!”

“Coach doesn’t even chase you as hard as he chases us around the track, yet you’re the one who sounds like a crumpled soda can,” Epel commented warily.

“Is this normal for humans?” Deuce asked in concern, forelegs shuffling nervously as they made their way towards their next class. “It sounded like it really hurt…do you need to see the nurse?”

Yuu shrugged and said, “No, I’m fine, really. It only really hurts if you try to force it and don’t let the muscles relax first. Back home, we have people called ‘chiropractors’ who do the cracking for us when we’re in too much pain to move a certain way. Don’t your joints crack and pop too?”

“Well yeah, whenever we stretch it can happen sometimes,” Ace answered. “But if it’s constant clicking like what you’ve been doing, it usually means that something is wrong like an injury or something.”

“Oh.”

“In canine monsters, it usually means that there’s a torn ligament or it’s bone rubbing against bone,” Jack explained. “My father experienced that once before, and it took him a while to heal after he got the problem fixed.”

“Oh wow…sorry, I didn’t mean to make you guys worry so much,” Yuu said, thinking back to the grape incident as they entered the classroom together. “I’ll try not to do it as often, okay?”

“If you have to do it, then don’t do it before or after I eat!” Grim said.

“You’re still eating the breakfast sandwich I made even though you complained about losing your appetite this morning.”

“As if the Great Grim would ever let good food go to waste…”

//

Class began as normal, Yuu listening to Professor Crewel as he instructed them on what was on the agenda for the day as the homework assignment was collected. For the most part it wasn’t bad, but today Yuu was feeling more tired than usual after the workout from this morning. As they sat at their desk, they shifted a little uncomfortably. There was some tightness in their upper back, and no amount of shoulder rolls or slight stretching could ease the pressure.

Out of the corner of their eye they saw one of their monster classmates begin to stretch, stretching his arms over his head as he yawned before settling back in his seat. Maybe that was the kind of stretch they needed to do…worth a shot anyway!

Raising their arms and interlocking their fingers, Yuu straightened their back and curved as their arms bent back—

CR-AK-KK-K-KH!!!

The whole classroom fell silent, multiple pairs of eyes turning to face Yuu as they sat frozen in their seat with arms still stretched over them. Even Yuu was stunned by the sheer volume of the cracks that escaped their back, faintly making out their friend’s expressions as they stared in open mouthed disbelief and horror. That was the loudest crack they’d ever heard their body make! At this point Yuu was afraid to move, looking like some comically stretched out statue.

Before anyone could ask if they were okay, Yuu asked, “…am I dead?”

///

Despite the sheer amount of panic and concern the class had over their wellbeing, Yuu was given the all clear by the medical researchers after a quick x-ray revealed that they had not—in fact—broken any bones. It was during a discussion with the researchers that it was discovered that chiropractors were in fact a thing in Twisted Wonderland. But given the fact that most monsters don’t use it as often as other medical practices such as acupuncture, it’s become a rare practice that very few still teach.